THE GENERAL'S DINNER At the Lady CRISPES, with His LADY, and Officers of the ARMY How his Excellency was invited by a Cook.  
THE Manner of the Dinner, Their great danger of being all poisoned; and remedies used to preserve them.  
AND The COOK who was the Chief Actor, COMMITTED.  
Printed in the Year, 1647.   

THE GENERAL'S DINNER, At the Lady CRISPES, with hi● LADY, and Officers OF THE ARMY.  
ILL men plot mischief, and the good may su●fer, yet not always, The Acts of treachery do n●● ever prosper; The guard of heavenly power defend the Saints, from the malice of hell, and wicke● men.  
A Design was laid against his Excellency S●● Thomas Fairfax, what the bottom of it was, is pr●vate only to the Plotters yet not hid from the deity.  
A Cook who came out of France, (as he said,) with some gentlemen, came to Hammersmith, to the Lady Crispes House, where he desired to speak with th● Lady herself.  
The Lady Crispe coming to him, he told her that he was come from two Gentlemen, newly come from France, who were there, well acquainted with Sir Nicholas Crispe her Husband, who is now there in good-health, And they would be very willing to wait upon her, (saving moreover,) that these Gentlemen had some Officers of Sir Thomas Fairfaxes Army to invite to a dinner, And the business of his coming at that time was to entreat the use of her house, for him to dress the dinner for them, which would be a very convenient place for that purpose, and a noble favour to those Gentlemen who would be glad to enjoy that opportunity to acquaint her Ladyship, with some things from her Husband, And that if she pleased to do that favour for them, They had apppointed him, to get the Dinner ready for them.  
The Lady Crispe, being desirous to hear from her Husband, and willing to accommodete, any Gentlemen with such a courtesy, especially in such a case as this, and to receive such Guests, she told him, that with all her heart, her house was at their service.  
Then this Cook went to Turnham-greene, to the General's Excellency Sir Thomas Fairfax; where his Excellency then was with his Lady, intending to return from his Lady, back to Putney after a day or two.  
The Cook asked to speak with the General's Lady: where he was demanded by one of the Lady's Gentlewomen whom he came from, he answered, from 〈◊〉 Lady crisp, upon a business which required a ●●●●aine Answer.  
The General's Lady came to him, and asked what he had to say to her, The Cook told her Ladyship, that he was sent from (a noble Lady) the Lady Crispe Sir Nicholas Crispes Lady, who is at Hammersmith to desire her Ladyship, that with his Excellency, she will be pleased to honour the Lady Crispe so fare as to Dine with her, and that her Ladyship would take it for a very great honour, if his Excellency, and her Ladyship, will be pleased to answer her expectations herein.  
The General's Lady told her, that she knew the Lady Crispe, to be a very noble Lady, and of good repute in those parts, And that she would speak to her Husband, and suddenly return an answer.  
Accordingly the General's Lady went to his Excellency and told him, that the Lady Crispe had sent to invite them to a Dinner, with her, The General was unwilling to go, but by the persuasions of his Lady in regard of that good repute which the Lady Crispe hath in all those parts, she prevailed with his Excellency to consent to it. And accordingly the Cook was told, that he was desired to give thanks to the Lady Crispe; And that the General with his Lady would wait upon her at the time desired.  
The Cook returned, and acquainted the Lady Crispe, that the Gentlemen would be there to trouble her house for meeting and dressing of a dinner, upon her Ladyship's consent: and for that purpose this Cook brought in meat, so much as cost him only 16. s. and no more, which he dressed for dinner in the Lady Crispes house.  
About noon his Excellency Sir Thomas Fairfax, with his Lady, came to Lady Crispes house, it being the time appointed; and with his Excellency, came Colonel Reinsborough, Doctor Steines, with his Excellencies, and her Ladyship's attendance.  
The Lady Crispe had news presently brought to her, that Sir Thomas Fairfax was come thither, with his Lady and others, which did no little amaze her, wondering what should be the cause of his coming thither, and yet it came into her mind, that perhaps his Excellency might be invited by some eminent persons though she knew not who they were, but in regard she knew nothing how things were appointed, she was puzzled exceedingly what to do.  
The General wondered as much that he should come and sit in the Hall, and the Lady Crispe not come presently to welcome them, yet charitable thoughts made the best construction of it.  
His Excellency (after a while) was brought into the dining room; but the Lady Crispe wondered that the General and his Lady were there, and no body but the Cook to entertain them, so that she knew not how to carry herself in the business; but she went in and saluted the guests, though she was very ignorant whose they were, yet was loath to discover it, until she knew what the issue would be, yet she did much admire that none should appear to invite such guests but the Cook.  
At last dinner was brought up, and his Excellency with his Lady, and Colonel Rainsborough, and Doctor Steines late down with the Lady crisp to dinner, the General, & the rest of his company supposing it had been provided by the Lady Crispe, and the Lady Crispe (though puzzled what to think of it, yet) imagining that perhaps it might be sent in by the General.  
There was of this meat which cost but 16. s. made above twenty dishes of meat, all French Quickslas, such as none of the company knew what any of them were, save only the Cook himself, yet they all had very good tastes, and it was supposed they had been dishes of greater value: the General conceiving them to be appointed by the Lady Crispe, she by the General's Lady: but the Lady Crispe called for wine, and what she had in the house fit for that table.  
About the middle of the dinner, the usual time of discourse, and drinking one to another, and bidding each other, much good do it you, and the like; the Lady Crispe made an Apology to his Excellency, and the rest, desiring to be excused, that she was so wanting in things fit for their entertainments, in regard she had no knowledge at all of their coming, and that had she known herself to be worthy of that visit, she would have had something fitting for the entertaining of such honourable persons, the want whereof she desired to be excused in, because of the sudden surprise.  
With that they were all startled, and the invitation by the Cook (in the Lady Crispes name) told: where upon the Cook was called for, who being demanded the reason of his abuse therein: Answered, that he heard his Excellency wanted a Cook, and he did not know how to present himself better to his Excellency, then by making a visible demonstration of what he was able to do, and with little cost.  
The Cook hereupon is committed to the custody of the Marshall-Generall of the Army.  
And a great fear being had of some poison, that might be in the meat (as probably some mischief was in it) They all had potions given them, and have since been in a course of physic, so that (God be praised) they are all well.  
FINIS.