Mercurius Vapulans, OR NAWORTH Stripped and Whipped.  
IN ANSWER To a most Base and Scandalous Pamphlet, called Mercurio-Coelico-Mastix, OR AN ANTI-CAVEAT, etc.  
Sent abroad from Oxford, under the Name of G. NAWORTH.  
In opposition to MERCURIUS COELICUS, OR A Caveat to all the People of the Kingdom; Lately penned by Mr. JOHN BOOKER.  
By TIMOTHEUS PHILO-BOOKERUS.  
Printed according to Order for I.F. March 4. 1644.   

NAWORTH Stripped and whipped.  
WIth your leave, Mr. Booker I mean to salute an acquaintance of yours whom I have perceived to walk abroad a pretty while unregarded, or not met with by you: For I am persuaded had you in all this time seen him, you would not have let him pass the chastisement of your Pen. George Naworth is come abroad again in a new suit of Slander, most speciously begirt with lies; but I will on button him for you to his Principles, and strip his libellous soul stark naked and lash him through the streets of London back again to Oxford, with such Whipcord lines, that all the Wit there shall be hardly able to recover him. I must put up this Malignant Chaldean in sharp pickle, that he may relish well, and so powder him with my pennyworth of salt, that his infamous name may be preserved to the ears of posterity, as fresh in villainy, as it was the first day he came in Print.  
I perceive the Devil will have his Agents in every profession, to cross and calumniate the proceed, and favourers of this most excellent and illustrious Parliament: The Court, the Pulpit, and the Country are all become Vassals to the designs of jesuites, and to the desperate sense of forlorn Incendiaries, every one striving by tongue, or pen, to exercise his venom, and blast the glory of this hopeful Reformation. Among the rest, Mr. G. N. is not the least, one of the Egyptian Ptolemy's Bastards; for he never was of the true strain of Astronomy, and were Kepler or Tycho living, they would loathe such an Apostate from their Profession, which should thus disgrace them, leaving Almanacs to live by slanderous Pamphleting; but this hath happened since his Durham brains were referred to the Latitude of Oxford poor allowance, where their Almutens domineer for the most part, like their friends the Capuchins, in Aquarius and Pisces, and if they chance to plunder any better diet, now and then in Virgo, with full Conjunction; yet a safer and honester way G. N. might have been thought upon for maintenance, than in opposition to the bright stars in our firmament, striving to eclipse their lustre with thy malicious malignancy, or then by calculating treason against the State, to give the world occasion of Prognosticating what will become of thee in the end, when Gregory will be predominant, and thou ascendant in the Trine of Tyburn, where thy Influence will be choked, and thou prove a falling Star.  
G. Naworth gives us to understand, that within six days after Mr. Booker had printed his Mercurius Coelicus, it came to his hands in Oxford, and that in the space of six hours he wrote the Answer to it. Neither of these G. N. is any wonder; for had it been never so worthless, weak, and dull, you have so many fast friends here, which will not let the least parcel pass, but if it be possible they will cram it into their Intelligence, and send it to you; much more probable than it is, that so subtle, so well constitutioned a Mercury as that was, of so much concernment against thee, should come in that space to thy hands. And as for thy answer to it in six hours, we lest of all wonder at that, for all of your party are very sufficient Railers, even Naturallized into detraction and lying: such stuff flows freely of itself, you need not strain for it; It is the true temper of your Brains, the very constitution and complexion of the Court, Camp, and University: Every one of you is as another Aulicus, a Rakehill, a store-house of treachery and villainy, full of mischievous Plots and Machinations. But I would have thee, Naworth, with all thy Stargazing, find out another man in the Moon, to manage the next devilish Conspiracy better, and then I prognosticate unto thee at least a Knighthood: it were a more acceptable service than Pamphleting, and the ready road to honour. What a rare sight would it be to see your Worship strut in the streets, like another Vrsa Major, swear in Taverns there is no Sun but Sack and Spanish gold, look scornfully upon your old friends the Planets, and bid defiance to all but Charles-wain. To leave the Zodiac, and all the Celestial Circles, to swagger about in a Military Belt, from George Naworth to become Sir George, and as haughty as St. George for England.  
You think to climb even as Aulicus doth, and I think so too, one day we shall see it: for thou runnest in the some villainous strain with him, and I conceive, justice will not be impartial. Thou sayest, This is not the first time it hath been thy fortune to encounter with a Rebel. Rebels are your best friends, and I can calculate the truth hereof from the 23. of Octob. 1641. at which time the damnable Rebellion in Ireland first broke forth, that they have been the greatest friends to your Cause, and the chief pillars whereupon the main of your Oxford design rested; and this is more than apparent by this which followeth, that having done their work again in Ireland, they should now be brought over hither to further the ruin of this Kingdom. But thou talkest of the encountering, and sayest, it is not the first time. I hope it is not fight you mean, you would not be accounted a Martial trifle: I have calculated thy Nativity, and must tell thee, that Mars was under the Hatches when thou wert borne, Venus like a dirty slut was predominant, and looked askew upon thee, so that ever since she bestowed a livery upon thee at thy birth, thou hast worn her Colours, and followed her Camp, and art as I hear an arrant Craven, fit only to bristle among Hens, in plain English, Dunghill jades, and very likely to live and die in that service, a sworn Votary, Vassal, and Martyr to the Kerchief. There is another kind of encountering, and that is with the Pen, viz. Pamphleting, and in this thou hast been a notable stickler to hold life and soul together, and to eclipse our brightest stars in the Firmament; but thou knowest what I can prognosticate from such an Eclipse, and Mr. Booker will tell thee, the world cannot be deluded in so evident a Prognostic, if thou hold on this course.  
But G. Naworth will hold on that course still; because he, I perceive, is one of those deluded wretches that builds his faith upon Mercurius Aulicus, and so is utterly ignorant of the excellent courses taken here, and says, what many Silly people among them do absolutely believe, that we are fading here, and nothing now left to support us but Fears and jealousies. Yes, you will allow us a little money too, I hope, and some Victuals, though you make your Oxford friends believe we have neither, but that we are almost ready to cut our own throats for want of both. I thought truth might be a little more common among you, but I see you put out the candle before your friends, and leave them in the Dark, lest the light should discover your baseness.  
Thou sayest we are here furnished with an Implicit Faith. It is well that we have some faith, you have not enough to keep you from being Infidels, and Atheists: your Roman Faith is to break Faith, and to break the necks of them which trust you; and so Implicit, that it is a mere snare to an honest heart, and to be abhorred by all that are truly Protestant.  
Thou sayest we mistake grossly, if we think to prevail at Oxford by entreaties. First, we know you are merciless; Secondly, we have no occasion to entreat you, and scorn entreating as much as we hate your former treacherous treating. And thirdly, you will find shortly by experience, that we do not think to prevail by entreating; for we mean to entreat, and handle you, as our valiant brethren of Scotland do Newcastle, so that if yourselves do prevail at all, it must be by entreating bag and baggage.  
Thou sayest that thy infamous Chronologie is not at all ashamed of its Descent, not fearful Mr. Booker should calculate its Nativity. Mr. Booker never intended to calculate either yours, or your Books; Yet I know that Saturn, or some such Dull Planet had an influence upon your brains in the hatching, and he took the pains to calculate your death, though not the Descent of your book, which will be (that I may use my own words) by an Ascent upon the Trine where Gregory is predominant.  
Why dost thou undervalue our Calculations for the Meridian of London? We can Calculate his Excellencies approach to Oxford, and Sir William waller's journeying to the West, and his baiting the Devon and Cornish Brutes into a better sense of Religion, and the Scots conquest in the North, their taking of Newcastle, purging the marquis with a Pill against Popery, making the Gospel shine all over the Northern parts, and so dazzle the Newarkers, that they will not put them to the trouble of Scaling the Works: Many more such exact Calculations as these are we can boast of, and even triumph before hand, not so much from sense and reason, as by those most excellent warlike Engines, Faith, Fasting and Prayer.  
Thou bidst us to know that Rebellion is as the Sin of Witchcraft; your Oxford Rebellion is indeed Witchcraft itself; It were too tedious to number up those many State-Conjurers there, which continually work with the Devil for the raising of more, and greater storms to wrack this small Vessel of the Kingdom, wherein We, our Religion, and fortunes, are embarked. I need not bid you labour for the Art, because I hear you are in a very fair way already, and I suppose that shortly your Scholars will be admitted to Degrees in the profession, it being all the way you have left for the maintenance of your Protestant Religion.  
Thou bidst us also remember what the Earl of Strafford told us at his death. We remember very well that he said, There was a cloud hanging over this Kingdom. He saw it, and it is apparent enough he was throughly acquainted with the Designs now in agitation, which if it be true, what an account could he give before the Celestial Tribunal, for his silence at his death in such a case! He could never have given greater glory to the Majesty of heaven, nor a better testimony of his repentance unto the world, then to have Discovered secrets of so high concernment, to the future happiness of the Religion, and Kingdom.  
Thou confessest thyself to grow Ambitious. Ambition is an Oxford disease, and why then not thou infected with that as well as the rest?  
Thou wouldst have us imitate thee in our extemporary prayers. We have so much Christianity as to remember thee, and all that are in any desperate estate in our prayers; And if so be it be possible ever to hear that you begin to pray, we may chance to imitate you, if your way be tolerable.  
But what have we to do with thy Almanac for the year 1639. that thou shouldest bid us remember, there was something in it which pointed at the Firebrands which kindled this unnatural and bloody War, and a Memorandum likewise of the Insurrection, and intended invasion of the Scots. I suppose those whom thou meanest for the Firebrands, were the Lights of the Commonwealth, which was then overclouded with a general Darkness. But I wonder thou couldst not be as quicksighted now upon the second coming in of our brethren to help to rescue us from our miseries. I know thee of a more ambitious pretending spirit, than to say thou didst not foresee it by the Stars long before. How came it to pass then that thou and thy companion Aulicus should be so impudent, that when their advance forward was generally known, and confirmed, ye did continually deny it in that Rascal Pamphlet, to keep the knowledge thereof from your own Partee, lest they should be disheartened?  
But hold, hold good George, be not so hasty to make yourself famous, by scandalously abusing Mr. Booker, as thou dost; for I would have you take a little patience, whilst I court you with your own language in his behalf; I think thou art already as famous a Rebel, as any I know of thy stamp. I know it hath been thy daily practice, and Profession (otherwise very likely to starve) for a long time to delude the Ignorant with fopperies, and I suppose thou art become ridiculous enough to all such as have had any dealing with thee, or so much as heard of the Name of Naworth.  
Do not for pity's sake rub an old sore, and lash out Sir john Hotham, and call him Rebellious, nor say that he traitorously denied his Majesty entrance into Hull, whereas at last he intended to lay on so fair a plaster, supposedly to salve up his honour; He hath only mistaken the way to Court. I pray you good G. Naworth be not angry with him, for hee-meant your cause no harm.  
But what is the reason G. N. that one while you commend Mr. Booker, and tell us, that you are proud of jumping in the same opinion with him in the year 1639 concerning the Eclipse of the Sun: And now in the year 1644. you are as proud in being of a contrary opinion with him, and very ambitious in taking occasion to thwart him in the business concerning the grand Eclipse of the Sun in our Firmament, by reason of so many Malignant bodies conjoined, to hinder the Royal Influence from us. This is a sign that Mr. Booker is the best Astronomer of the two, and you now mistaken in your Calculation: We have the clear Perspective of a true Parliament, by the help whereof we can discern through all your dark pretences, and behold those many false destructive Clouds, which eclipse the Royal Splendour, and shower down a Deluge of mischiefs, and miseries upon the Kingdom. But thou askest Mr. Booker what all this is for a Caveat to the whole Kingdom. Yes very pertiment: And it is a most honest part to give people warning of the miseries like to ensue, and by a timely Prognostication to anticipate thy vile and abominable Calculation, and demonstrate unto the world what indeed thou art; A counterfeit, pernicious, and lying Pamphleter.  
Thou sayest, that we stand more and more in need of the Scots, and that we had best provide money for them quickly; otherwise, No penny, no Pater noster. What need they have money, G. N. from us, when the Northern marquis is like to bear their charges with his treasure, jewels, Coin, and Coale-pits? I dare say, he will pawn all his Popish Trinkets, and leave himself very bare in Religion to pleasure them. I am persuaded (good kind soul) he will not deny them their Penny nor their Paternoster, nor the Pater noster row of Diamonds, over which he rambles himself quite out of breath a mornings to exercise his devotion into a meritorious posture.  
In the next place thou sayest, thou wilt come closer to Mr. Booker: yet (not to● close I advise you for fear of hanging) And thou wouldst be informed, upon what grounds Mr. Booker deduced the signification of the putting in execution the illegal Commission of Array: And also the settling of the Militia of the Kingdom by the Parliament, from the Conjunction of Mars and Jupiter, the 15. day of May 1643. A weaker Astronomer than Mr. Booker might have Prognosticated this long before that time, with sufficient grounds for the conjecture: for the putting in Execution the illegal Commission of Array, was the effect of the Conjunction before mentioned, when Mars being surrounded with Malignant Constellations, and in a warlike posture was cherished with a favourable Aspect from our Royal jupiter, and radiated the fatal beams of Gunpowder to destroy us, And had destroyed us, had not the opposition of some more benign stars prevented it, by that provident Act of settling the Militia of the Kingdom.  
But thou proceedest, and wouldst maintain, that both these being effects of a contrary nature, cannot both follow the same Conjunction; and demandest, How one and the same Position, at one and the same time, should produce two such contrary effects. I should give thee satisfaction in this, but that thou puzzelst me with Franciscus junctinus, Albohazen Haly, & other Pagan Malignants of thy acquaintance, such as jupiter junctus cum Malevolo, Planetae Vincentes (or rather Victae) pretended Parliament (with you at Oxford) dignities Essential and Accidental (all as frivolous as your Great Seal) I tell thee it is evident enough, that from the same Conjunction abovesaid, proceeded the Illegal Commission of Array, & the settling of the Militia; that to offend & destroy, this to defend & preserve the Kingdom.  
Thou hast another touch at Mr. Booker's Almanac, and deniest that the Sun and Mars were in Opposition on the same day the Battle was at Keynton field, Where our Invincible Army received such a wound, which Westminster Physic will never cure. Is not this a palpable falsehood? Was not our Royal Sun that day in opposition to Mars, and eclipsed too? If we grant it otherwise, we should belie ourselves, and we need not do it, Mr. G.N. when you are so nimble at it. For shame mention not Keynton, nor Edge-Hill any more, where your seduced Comrades received more wounds in their Bodies, than you could supply with ordinary Physic; and the festered Malignity of your Cause was so bruised, that ever since to this day it remains incurable.  
Now thou art on thy way as far as Edge-Hill in lying, thou wilt needs have us to be sound beaten there, and that our truly valiant General was very tame the next morning. If he was so tame, why then did you not cage him? How happened it he was not taken and imprisoned, for letting out so much of your noble, and base, degenerous and wild blood? Let the consideration of this be referred to any but of indifferent judgement; But there is little hope of your confessing truth, till the last judgement, where your consciences must answer for the bloodshed.  
And here, Mr. G.N. you must give me leave to tell you, that though you say, You do not live by cheating and lying, yet you do by making of cheating and lying Pamphlets, and by Calculating of News for the Meridian of Oxford; for the truth of affairs must not walk abroad there, either naked, or in their own clothing, but must be translated into such a habit, as will be most pleasing, and acceptable to the hearers; this you may confess in time, without equivocating, or mental reservation.  
And whereas thou sayest, Mr. Booker dares not go to Oxford, unless it be for a Spy; I think even assoon as thou darest come to London for a morning's entertainment at the Exchange, where you may chance to curse your Ascendant too, and look with such an Aspect, that you never observed a worse upon a Protestant at Court.  
Thou wilt by no means yield that thou camest to Oxford by Sea; but sayest, 'tis well known thou camest by land. Whether by Sea, or by land, is no great matter; but I fear, your last journey will be by neither. And to fit thyself the better for this last journey, here thou beginnest the second part of the Lamentation of Cheapside Cross, well tuned with Blasphemy: for thou sayest, It was the only thing whereby w● are distinguished, and known from Turks, Iew●, and Infidels. it being the true and only badge of the ●ame 〈◊〉 profess. Thus thou makest Cheapside Cross an essential part of Christianity. Is this the fruit o●●●ur Oxford studies? I pray thee Naworth, tell us for what Meridian this Divinity was cal●●l●t●●, it is of too great a latitude for London.  
Now because of the seasonable demolishing this Idol of yours called Cheapside Cross, thou meanest to pay us home with a competent sum of slander for our pains, and being to act the second part of Aulicus, (whose younger brother thou art) thou callest the honourable Parliament, which will remain a true Parliament, in spite of all the devilish calumnies you can vomit up against it, a Pretended Parliament: Our valiant truehearted Colonels and Commanders thou reckonest up to be Wood mongers, Fell-mongers, Button makers, etc. (Thou callest them so, because they fell and knock you down so fast, and teach your Breeches to make Buttons:) O●● grave and religious Assembly of Divines, thou callest, A Schismatical Assembly of Tailors, Millers, Cobblers, and Weavers, etc. (so they are to sew up the rent which your Prelates and their adherents have made in the Church, and cobbled it up with their own superstitious tackle, and wove into the garments of Christ's Spouse strange stuff;) And Millers, I hope they are likewise to grind Popery to powder; and we wish them any thing; so they may hold the Pope's Nos● to the Grindstone. Then thou callest the Scottish Commissioners, the Incendiaries between th● two Kingdoms of England and Scotland. (We will join with them to burn down the house o● Baal to the ground.) The Lord Major, Aldermen, and Common Council men. Taxe-bearing Mules They are still contented to bear your slanderous reproaches, and to bear any burden but th● Popes: they are unwilling to be road on by him, and the Cardinals with a Peter pence bridle.  
Thou wonder'st we go not about to alter the Coin, there being so many Crosses upon it. I t●●● thee we will keep and embrace any Cross that will cross your design of Idolising the Cross▪  
Thou sayest the Scholar's long to see Mr. Booker, and dispute with him, whether Newcastle Coale be the Element of fire or not. There needs no dispute in the matter, though the marquis cannot resolve you, the Coal-pits being out of his possession, and his power quenched there; yet we can inform you, that he intended to create a Region of fire there, by setting th● pits on fire, and Phaeton-like to burn asunder the Axletree of the Kingdom, that we● with himself might all drop into ruin together.  
I cannot believe but that thou art Aulicus his bedfellow, his sole Companion, for thou runnest altogether in the same strain with him every way, and callest the Lord Say, late Lord Say, and his Chaplain a Miller. He hath served an Apprenticeship indeed, and hath learned to grind● Popish Trinkets too, et omnia ejusdem farinae.  
Next of all thou art troubled about Mariana his book, which was burnt at Paris for teaching it lawful for Subjects to kill their Kings and Princes quocunquo modo, etc. And wouldst have i● reprinted by Order of both Houses. If your pretended Houses at Oxford will not order the Printing of it, you may have it done in Ireland: the Doctrine will take there, and I fear at Oxford too. In the mean time forbear such idle slandering that great Conjunction at Westminster. Th● effects of it will last many Februaries, in spite of your Malignant Opposition, and flourish when you and all your hellish Stratagems do fade and fail you. Call them not Opacous, dark and unwieldy stars, which reject to be enlightened with the lively and wholesome Rays of the Sun, (ou● Royal King Charles) For they are bright and shining stars, which disperse reviving heat light, and comfort through all parts of this dying Kingdom, and will still continue glorious in that excellent lustre, which the Royal sun was pleased to bestow upon them, though now he● cannot deign them a favourable Aspect, being clouded from them. And yet we hope once to breath in that happy time, when his Majesty will recollect himself, and call up those engrafted Principles of Nobleness, Piety, true Religion, and Reason, which made him formerly admired and beloved by his People: Nay the very light of nature cannot but be sufficient to dispel t●a● darkness wherein you and your friends walk blind fold to destruction, if you were not wholly besotted and given up to a spirit of delusion. Hence it is that we have so little hope of your conversion; and therefore I shall not spend many words, but leave that to God and his Ministers. Only give me leave to dismiss thee with an Anagram, the English of thy name, 
 GEORGIUS NAWORTH. 'TIS A WHORING ROGVE.  
And this English agrees with the Calculation of thy Nativity I formerly gave thee. I advise you George Naworth, to amend your Calculation and your life in Oxford, if it be possible; for it 〈◊〉 supposed the Scots will fright you from returning to Durham; for if you came thither, the Sentence would be, that you must not return to the place from whence you came, but to the Gallows, against which there will be no Anti-caveat. So farewell.  
Timotheus Philo Bookerus.  
FINIS.