Mistress PARLIAMENT Presented in her Bed, after the sore travail and hard labour which she endured last weeek, in the Birth of her Monstrous Off▪ spring, the 
 Child of Deformation.  
The hopeful fruit of her seven Years Teeming, And a most precious Babe of Grace.  
With the several Discourses between Mrs. Sedition, Mrs. Schism, Mrs. Synod her dry-Nurse, Mrs. jealousy, and others her Gossips.  

Oh sick! oh saint! alas my sight doth fail,  
My Members tremble and my Spirits quail;  
Oh what a chillness doth my heart oppress,  
But what the cause of't is, I know you'll guess  
'Tis this most hedious Birth doth me a maze,  
And much torment me when on it I gaze:   

But more when as I think what men will construe,  
To see th'expected Babe of Grace prove Monster.   
BY Mercurius Melancholicus.  
May .10th London  
Printed in the Year of the Saints fear. 1648.   

Mrs. PARLIAMENT presented in her Bed, after the sore travail and hard labour which she endured last week, in the Birth of her Monstrous offspring, the CHILD OF DEFORMATION. Mrs. Shisme 
The Kingdom's mine, I am the child, My name's Tom. Presbyter.  Mrs. Sedition 
'Tis false, 'tis Th' Saints; whose King I'm, styled, Holy St. — Oliver.  Mrs. Schism 
We are the Saints, we, Presbyters.  Mrs. Sedition 
We Independents, are.  King Charles 
Nor Saints, nor Kings, what need these stirs?  
'Tis mine which you would share.  Jealousy 
I smell a plot, the Kings no doubt,  
To prove true, what is known;  
When Thiefs about stolen goods fall out  
True men still get their own.  Mrs. Sa. Yandseal 
No, no, arm, arm (the common Foe  
Appears for Charles) I'll; bawl  
Herod and Pilate made friends so,  
Though Christ, he then must fall  
The Child-wif's laid, the tables spread: but oh!  
The Gossips strive for place, 'tis always so.   


Act. 2. Scen. 1.  Sedition. 
ANd why you first, Mrs. Schism. Pray you give place to Seniority.  Schism. 
Nay, nay, neighbour Sedition, me thinks you and I should be better friends, our affections are the same.  Sedition. 
And one Progenitor, the Devil, belongs to both I confess, only, because I come of the Elder house (for though you are of the House of the Incendiaries in the Church, which is a very ancient Family, I grant, yet I am of that of the Incendiaries in the State, which precedes in antiquity) I claim the priority, both here, and also in presenting my service to Mrs. Parliament, yea, I expect the pre-eminence above you in her Honour's employments too.  Schism. 
Cousin! Whatsoever your seniority may plead for you to her in your behalf, my past actions in her service may exact as due to my deserts: Never did any State Incendiary bring the Designs of any Tyrant to such perfection in an age, as I have done Mrs. Parliaments in less than seven years, under the vizard of Religion, therefore, by your leave Mrs. Sedition, I think myself worthy to be preferred before you in her affections.  Sedition. 
Marry gip with a wynnion! you preferred before me. Have not my pretences, to make every freeborn Subject a quiet possessor of his propriety and liberty, to suppress Tyranny, and prevent Arbitrariness in the King (which I intent to act myself) brought Mrs. Parliament to this height of unlimited power which now she is at, and do you think now to carry away her favour from me?  Mrs. Sa. Yandseale. 
Fie, fie friends fall out about trifles? You have both deserved well, and no doubt shall in fit time and place receive your reward; but agree, agree, and the rather because the common enemy gins to stir and hold up his head again: and will you by your divisions give life to their dead hopes? what were this but to blast all your former glorious actions, absolutely frustrate all your golden hopes, and wholly annihilate your vast expectations, and will you now prove such enemies not only to her, whose servants ye profess yourselves to be, but also to yourselves and all your friends? Come come, you shall (like gentlewomen of equal birth and merit) walk hand in hand, and have the same degree of place at her table and in her affections: only for the present I must prevail with Mrs. Schism, that Mrs. Sedion may have her right hand; for Mrs. Parliament hath now occasion to use the sword, (as indeed when will she not find occasion to use?) and we all know Mrs. Sedition knows how to wield that best for her advantage.  Mrs. Schism. 
I am content, for I must confess that I am no ●●ghter, though none could ever match me for an Incendiary and Abettor to war and blood▪ shed.  please you walk to Mrs. Sedition?  Mr. Sedition. 
Your Servant, in your hand, sweet Cousin Schism.  Mrs. 
So this is well and timely brought about.  Exeunt. Sa. andseale. 
We lose our precious hopes if these fall out.   

Scen. 2.  Enter Mrs. Parliament in Childbed. Mrs. Parl. 
Nurse, Nurse,— why Nurse, Where art thou Nurse?  Enter Mrs Synod Dry Nurse. Nurse. 
Anan forsooth Mistress, I am here: What is't your pleasure I should do?  Mrs. Parl. 
O, prithee Nurse speak softly (for a time:) the noise which tho● makest with thy babbling and prating pierceth my head, and may prove a great hindrance of my Recovery, if not totally obstruct it. I am very weak with my past sore Travail, and should I fall into a Relapse it might cost me my Life; and then Nurse, you would (I know) confess (as being sensible of your loss) that the most bountiful Mistress, that ever you had, is deceased: Was it ever known that such a rate was given a Dry Nurse before; four shillings a day, besides other by-blows, gratuities and especially three or four steeple-houses and pofitable Lectures? therefore Nurse it nearly concerns you to have a special care of me.  Nurse. 
Dear Mistress, you shall for the future experience my diligence to comply in all things with your desires, and my care hereafter shall evidence the readiness of my obedience to your commands.  Mrs. Parl. 
It is well said Nurse:— But is Mrs. Truth gone?  Nurse. 
Gone, quoth you? Why what should she do here? Do you ever hope to recover your strength or regain your credit by her? If you should follow her Directions and take such Physic as she would prescribe you, she would give you such a Potion as would make you fall a vomiting with a witness, and then up would come (to the view of the whole World) all that you have converted to the satisfying of your own private Lust, though pretended to be done for the public good of the Kingdom; as the Revenues of the Crown—  Mrs. Parl. 
O, prithee Nurse speak softly.  Nurse. 
Noble men's Estates, Bishops Lands and Houses, all Sequestrations, and vast Compositions, besides great sums of Loan-money for Rebel's Lands in Ireland, Public Faith Money, Excise money, Contribution and Freequarter; All would up. Verily Mistress, if you be ruled by her, it will inevitably follow, that you cannot escape your (I too sadly fear too too sudden) dissolution.  Mrs. Parl. 
It is truth Nurse; I have ever rejected her Counsels (though I have always made the World believe I have followed them most precisely) and though I sent for her in my extremity, and desired her to indite that feigned Confession so to blind the eyes of the World that I might the more securely and undiscovered compass mine own Design, yet know Nurse, that I hate her company, and loath her sight, much less will I follow her Dictates and Directions.  Nurse. 
No, do not Mistress, Did you ever reap any benefit by her company? or, Did at any time any good accrue to you by following her counsel? If the People should know all that she can tell of you (and she can as well be hanged [which you know is the least you have deserved] as conceal her knowledge, but will at some time or other discover all) What would be the event thereof? Indeed Mistress I tremble to think (being in the same condemnation, and deserving the same reward with yourself) and by that little experience thereof, which you have had of late you may be sensible enough what you must expect.  
No, no, Mistress, if you hope to recover again, make use of Mistress Mendax, the whole Pack of your weekly forging Pamphleteers, they have ever stuck close to you, and by employing them still, you know how advantageous it hath been to the advance of your Designs; but among them all there is none (since Britannicus his decease) comparable to Luke Haruney or Walker, the quondam pillory Iremonger, he is always at your elbow, with his outside Satin, and inside Devil, ready to breathe into the ears of your tame Gulls and noosed Woodcocks, what you think may best advantage the Cause (though never so false) in his perfect Occurrence.  
Besides it is evident what service his double diligence hath done you in endeavouring to suppress your worst Enemies, the Tell-truths of the Times, Pragmaticus, Melancholicus, Elentichus, etc. whose publishing the Truth of those foul Enormities which they by intelligence have and do daily discover in your Actions, have done you more hurt of late, than all the King's Army could heretofore; by their pens having wounded you deeper in your credit and reputation, than ever the Sword of the Cavaliers did your body in your Soldiers; and therefore the care of your creature Walker, in endeavouring to discover and so suppress them, deserves your notice and encouragement. Besides as a testimony of his affection to your Service, and to manifest his knowledge to be as deep in the Greek as Hebrew Tongue, he hath desired you to hear this Etymology of Parliament, 1648.  Mrs. Parl. 
Read it, good Nurse, let me hear it: I know he ever puts that forth that shall tend to my Honour and advancement in the good opinion of the Saints. Read it Nurse, read it Nur. Parliament in the Greek is written thus 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉.  
They that can read and understand it may, I'll look for the English of it according to his direction, Rev. 17. v. 5.  Mrs. Parl. 
Do good Nurse, I long to know the English of it, MYSTERY BABYLON THE GREAT, the Mother of Harlots and Abominations, Nurse of error, heresy and blasphemy. Parl. O hold Nurse, sick, sick, a sudden shivering careers through every part, besides— a— deadly— qual— O — Nurse. Help good Women, help, help. Mrs. Schism, Mrs. Toleration, What are ye all deaf? Cannot one of you hear? Why Mrs. Sa-Yand-Seal. Help, help.   
Scen. 3. Enter Mrs. Sa-Yand-Seal in haste, after her Mrs. jealousy and the rest of the Gossips shrieking and screeming with Mrs. Suburbs the Deputy. Mrs. Sa-yand-seal. 
What's the matter Nurse?  Nurse. 
O Mrs. Parliament, Mrs. Parl.— is gone, is gone.  Mrs. Suburbs. 
Be patiented Nurse, she is but in a swoone, burn some ill-scenting thing under her nose: that will bring her again.  Nurse. 
Oh what shall I burn?  Mrs. Sa. Yandseale. 
Nothing makes a loathsomer smell than the Vote wherein she resolved upon the question, that she would make no more addresses to her husband, herhead, and that it should be treason for any to bring Messages from, or carry intelligence to him.  Mrs. Suburbs. 
'Tis well thought on, Mrs. Sa: Yandseale good Nurse run to H. Elsing, and wish him to cut it out of the journal book, and bring it thou hither, and burn it presently  from behind the Curtain Nurse. 
I fly — Melancholy 'tis more than time, shall I hail Rainsborough for you.  Mrs. Jealousy. 
But Gentlewomen do you not deceive yourselves? (pardon me I am jealous for Mrs. Parliaments good, and am the foundation upon which her rising to this height was laid at first) as I conceive no incense would smell better, and be more comfortable in all men's nostrils than the fume of that, burnt  Mrs. Sa. Yandseale. 
Yea (Gossip Jealousy) but not in the nostrils of all women, especially hers, because it would trouble her much to be made sensible of the burning of that her darling: and as for others, it is good to please fooles a while: so she recover, it is no matter for burning of it: when she ge●s strength again, 'tis but pre●mbling that it was done in fear, and in case of eminent danger, and t●en she may revote it again.  M●s Sedition. 
There spoke an Ac … p●l 〈◊〉 indeed, and he must needs be a good man, for we read th●t his counsel was as the Oracle—  Nurse. 
He ', her ', here '●is. Mrs. Sa. That's well burn it quickly, rub her temples, she sneezes— so, so,— she com●● again— why M●s. Parliament.  Enter Nu●se Mel. behind the curtain, 
And I hope shortly to see he come to that goodman's end, it will save G●ig the trouble.  Parl. 
Where am I— O sick, Awe— Awe,  Sa. 
A Basin Nurse, quickly:— so— up with it Women— so 'tis well.  Mrs. Sub 
God bless us, Whaa is here?— What black stuff is this?  Sa. 
Nothing but Atra bilis or melauchollicke adust, throwed aside, throwed aside, I have many times myself vomited the like.  Mell from behind the curtain. 
I believe you indeed Mrs. Sa-yand-seal, for (good People) it is no less than and Heresy Blasphemy, which during her health she winked at and swallowed, and now in her weakness up it is come: And— let me see— there is something else in the bowl— What is this?— A scroll?— and something writ in it too?— Read it Gentlemen, I warrant she hath uttered her mind in it.  

The Scroll.  
From XLI. to VIII. have I (a Brood  
Of Vipers) England swayed: and (in an hood  
Of zeal close lurking and the public Weal)  
Bewitched the simple and their hearts did steal.  

But now by time unmasked 'tis plainly seen  
For England's Blood and Wealth my thirst hath been.    
Gentlemen, I am sorry she's come again, I was in good hope she would have gone this bout, but (believe me) she's not long lived, the next news from Wales sets her packing, if that from the North do not do it before.  

Rouse up your valiant hearts brave English men  
And put in Charles his hand his sword again.   
God bless and save Him.    
FINIS.