Medicina Animae: Or, The LAMENTATION, And CONSOLATION of a Sinner.  
Together with several Collections out of the Holy Scriptures.  
By Joshua Mullard.  I said I will confess my sins unto the Lord, and so thou forgavest the wickedness of my sin. Psa. 32.6. 
LONDON, Printed by Tho. Harper, 1652.   

To the Reader.  
GEntle Reader, I began some part of this Penitential Meditation long since, when it pleased Almighty God to give me a sight of my sins, and grace to hate and forsake them. It may seem strange that I should make a public confession of them, when they are only known to Almighty God and myself. But I find David confessing his Adultery, and Manasses his Idolatry, and S. Paul confessing himself to be the greatest of sinners; and also I find that whosoever confesseth his sins and forsaketh them, shall find mercy: I must confess I did not intent to publish them, but that I was pressed by many of my friends to it, but more especially when I had read the judgement pronounced against the unprofitable servant that hide his Talon, Matth. 25.30. I thought it more safety to show my imperfections to men, then to disobey my Redeemer, and to lose my Talon. I desire thee, Reader, to read it all over before thou censure, and to pardon the imperfections thou meetest with.  
J. M.   

Medicina Animae: Or, The great Wound cured.  
Being Pious Meditations and Prayers, on the Lamentation, and Consolation of a Sinner.  


CHAP. I.  
O Who shall give water to my head and a fountain of tears to my eyes, that I may be able to bewail the losses of my soul with grief agreeable thereunto? for there is a manifest and great cause of sorrow, when with the sight of my mind I do behold my ancient days, and my youthful years: in this Meditation my spirit hath failed me; for I know what I was, nay rather what I should have been, and understand what I am, and fear what I shall be.  
And the less I sorrow, so much more do I fear: I would to God I sorrowed more, that I might fear less.  
But woe to me, O Lord, for now a long time thou smitest, and yet I sorrow not: Thou callest me, and yet I hear not: thou knockest, and yet I open not the bar of my hard heart unto thee.  
The sorrows of Death compassed me round about; and being filled with many sorrows without, I feel inwardly no sorrow that may work unto salvation: and I feel not only sorrows of old age, but I am a man of sorrow from my youth upward; and all my days are full of travel and grief, and yet I sorrow, because that always sorrowing, I cannot sorrow as I ought to sorrow.  
O marvellous and unspeakable wisdom of the heavenly Physician! O wonderful goodness of the most merciful God O singular benefit of him that is the Giver of all good things! for thou, O Lord, givest unto me sorrow, lest I should parish in pleasures, and that I may learn to rejoice without offence, thou givest me sorrow for a time, that I may not suffer everlasting pain: thou afflictest my body, that thou mayst save my soul.  
Thou scourgest, that thou mayest heal; thou killest, that thou mayest quicken.  
But alas! how unwillingly do I receive thy salve out of the secret hand of thy mercy? and being ignorant, do not acknowledge the sovereign medicine of healthful sorrow, wherein thou art mercifully severe against me: and how do I acknowledge it, if earnestly I desire to be delivered from sorrow, who without sorrow cannot be healed? for how can he be healed without sorrow, who by delight is made sick?  
Therefore, O Lord, make me to sorrow, and teach me a saving sorrow, that my grief may be turned into joy, and that I may rejoice in thy salvation.   

CHAP. II.  
Days pass away, and years slide away; but I unhappy man, after so many corruptions of my soul, after so most grievous and long follies, do not yet repent, nor am not afflicted for my sins; but continue the often falling into them again, and care not for rising, from heaping new unto old, and greater unto less.  
What shall I do, O Lord, or whither shall I go, when my last time shall come? where shall I be hidden from thy wrathful countenance? or whither shall I fly away from thy face, when thou shalt call me unto judgement, and require of me an account, of the talon bestowed upon me? what shall I answer unto thee? or how shall I excuse my negligence, when thou shalt sit upon thy throne of Majesty, and command me to give an account of my stewardship to the uttermost farthing? Surely I have nothing to say, but Lord I beseech thee to answer for me: for who am I that I should answer to thee in judgement? but if thou compel me to answer, I will say as a man confounded, trembling, and fearing; O Lord, I have gained nothing thereupon, but have wickedly and vainly misspent and consumed thy talon by my base living; I should better have said by dying; but then I thought I lived, but I was dead, because I lived without thee my true life; yea the life of a wicked man may rather be called death then life. I may say I sooner began to die then live; first I did not understand what life was, when I had forsaken the life of lives, and fountain of life. And malice did supplant my young age in manifold wickednesses. I was scarce come out of my mother's womb, but I was already a sinner: coming into the world, being yet ignorant of sin, I did bewail the sins wherein my parents begot me: neither did I altogether leave bewailing others sins, when I committed my own, which I knew, and did not bewail. Being an Infant, I followed iniquity, and spent my childhood wherein I should have been pure, impurely. There breathed slimy vapours from the sinful corruptions of my flesh, and the spring of my youth did shadow my heart, that it could not discern light from darkness, and the clearness of the mind, from the mist of lust; and traitorous and crafty pleasures, did carry my weak and forgetful lose age into the headlong rock of lust, so as I boiled up in wicked desires to be satisfied in Hell.  
From my childhood I grew to growing years, neither was I sooner growing towards youth, than my wickedness did grow ripe, and I was bold to grow wild in divers inordinate lusts, by the which being drawn, by the grief of wickedness, I was drowned to death, and destruction: the evil and wicked days of my growing years passed on, and I grew towards youth, but I returned backwards in filthiness and vanity: And as I was elder, I was a young man, and came to be a man; but Vice always flourished in me instead of Virtue: I waxed old and grey, and did not walk in thy ways, but as a child, being now an Old man, I lived childishly.  
Where then at any time have I been innocent, that I should be judged of thee according to the time of my innocency, though thou didst appoint it me unto judgement? for thou art just, O Lord, and righteous in all thy judgements; for thou rendrest to every one according to his works: and I fear all mine, because they are the works of darkness: And I have been a worker of iniquity from the beginning and have always willingly followed the works and paths of unrighteousness; I have wallowed in sin, as the Swine in filthiness, and as the Prodigal was fed with Husks, so was I delighted with filthy and evil words, and grieved with earnest, and profitable say; I did communicate with those that wrought iniquity, and did banquet with the chief of them, and did glory in sin.  
Being mighty in iniquity, I loved to excuse, and could not accuse myself, and made heavy my heart; and the more incurable is my sin, for that I did not think myself to be a sinner: Neither did I not only seek a medicine for my soul which was sick unto death, but refused it being offered, yea, with an unreverent and untamed mind was wroth against them that would minister it unto me; I despised them that reproved me, and embraced them that spoke pleasing unto me, and delighted in their speeches that had not their hearts right unto me: I studied devices, and lies in all things, and loved rather darkness then light: Behold, O Lord, I have delivered myself unto thee; this is the course of my life, wherein I have deserved thy wrath; this will I answer unto thee, when thou shalt ask of me: But do not remember the offences of my youth, nor my ignorances', O Lord, and enter not into judgement with thy servant, for no living creature shall be justified in thy sight; but if thou wilt enter, because thou art a God that loveth judgement, do judgement unto me, but not justice; and judge me according to the judgement of those that love thy name, that I may sing unto thee mercy and judgement.  
Remember, O Lord, that though I am wicked, yet I am thy servant, and the son of thy handmaid; and do not look into the multitude of my sins, but unto the greatness of thy mercies, and when thou shalt be angry with me for my wickedness, remember thy mercy, and be not angry with me for ever; but have mercy upon thy afflicted servant, that my soul may praise thee, and confess thy mercifulness.   

CHAP. III.  
WOE unto me, wretched man, because I have made my Redeemer angry with me, and I have rebelliously neglected his Law, and I have willingly forsaken the right way; and as a sheep that refuseth the shepherd, I have been carried far and wide round about, through dry unwatered places, wand'ring in the wilderness of wickedness, and not in the right way. I have gone to all rough and unaccessible places, and every where was anguish and tribulation: I have been wearied in the way of iniquity and perdition, and have walked in hard ways, seeking rest, and finding none; because I did not seek thee, O Lord, but was in a barren land, in the country of Death, where is no rest, but continual labour & affliction of spirit dwelleth there. I dwelled in anguish with pleasures, and amongst thorns did I make my bed, and sleep in death, and hoped for rest in torments: now therefore what shall I do, whither shall I turn myself in these great dangers? All the hopes of my youth are fallen down, and I am like one that suffereth shipwreck, who having lost all his wealth, swimmeth away naked, being tossed with the wind and sea, and am driven far from the haven of happiness, and do not take hold of the way of salvation, but am carried away on the left hand: the enemy had placed nets for me which way soever I went, and snares for my feet, and I despised them, and walked securely in slippery places, and flattered myself in sins; I thought youth was not held by the laws of death, and being deceived by this confidence, I followed the filthy desires of the flesh, and gave the reins beyond the measure of sensuality, following it wheresoever the force thereof did carry me; and said like a fool in my heart, Wherefore dost thou think of the end before the middle? thou hast many days yet remaining, and mayst be converted when thou listest: so waxed I old in sin, and a most wicked custom was turned into nature: and now as a bondslave to sin, I serve as it were chained, and as a mad man haling his own flesh seeketh to hurt himself, all reason of deliberation being quenched, so I more grievously and dangerously have hated my own soul; for the impenitency of my heart, and obstinate wilfulness, hath laid violent hands upon me, and hath distracted and disturbed my poor distressed soul: and so having brought unto myself the horror of Hell every day more and more, according to the hardness of my impenitent heart, I do heap up wrath against the day of wrath. I have made trial sometimes to shake off the old yoke, but am not able, because it cleaveth to my bones. Oh that at length it may fall from my neck, that I may love thee though late! It shall surely fall away, if thou command, O Lord, and send me help from above. I confess I have not deserved it, but thou, O most gracious giver, who makest the Sun to rise indifferently upon the good, as also upon the bad, and grantest temporal blessings to the unworthy, even when they ask them not; how canst thou deny spiritual things to those that require them? have mercy upon me therefore, O Lord, and fulfil the desires of a poor penitent sinner: thou that art rich in mercy, and wont cheerfully to have mercy, and dost purge the will from evil custom, and hearest the groan of those that are bound, and losest us from the bonds which we have made to ourselves, unless we refuse thy mercy: Give thy right hand unto the work of thy hands, that when I fall I may not be bruised; and that I may not be drawn into the deep pit of perdition: Deliver me from the mouth of the cruel Lion that is ready for the prey, and gapeth for my soul that he may devour it; for thou only art my protector, and my deliverer, and in thy mercy is my hope; let thy mercy therefore be showed unto me, as I have trusted in thee; Lord, in thee do I put my whole trust and confidence, Lord let me never be confounded.   

CHAP. IU.  
MY nights pass away in grief, and vex me with innumerable terrors: my Conscience shaketh me while I am awake, and I am tormented therewith as if I were wounded with a two edged sword; my sleep is troubled with divers illusions, bringing me no rest, but travel; I watch all night in my thoughts, and when (as being wearied) I do endeavour to give some sleep to my eyelids, by and by sleep departeth from my eyes, and when I sleep, I sleep always in sorrow, being wakened with an unquiet weariness from the Care of the day, and all my inward parts are inflamed without rest: the meat which before I desired, is made abominable to my soul, and my drink is mingled with tears, and confusion is before my eyes, and redness in my cheeks, when I remember how grievously I have offended thee, O my God, and in how many thoughts, deeds, and desires I have abused my strength, and thy gifts I have spent in vanity: Everlasting cares have consumed me, and being carried hither and thither with senseless cogitations I have spent my time: I feigned to myself dreams sometimes, and rejoiced, and vanished away being deluded in vanities and madness. To conclude, I lived in all kind of pleasure in the world, being banished far from the delights of thy house; and if at any time the fear of death and the last judgement did quicken my sloth, and for a little time call me from the deep gulf of pleasures, by and by I returned as a dog to his vomit, being dead in them, I yet live, and abiding in death, I hasten to death, and see death swift by coming to me: But let thy mercy quickly prevent me, before the terrible day of misery and calamity do come, the great and bitter day, that though I die, I may live, and declare thy mercies above all thy works: Look back, Lord, and behold how my soul lieth in her concupiscence, sick of the Palsy, and is evil vexed therewith; deliver it from death, that it may cleave to thee alone who art only the true life, and leaving all others, follow thee that art above all: say unto my soul, O Lord God of my salvation, be it unto thee as thou desirest; make me to hear this thy voice a voice of rejoicing, and salvation, that I may run after thee, and take hold of thee, and not let thee go until thou sendest me whole away; for (being sick) to whom should I go but to thee, that I may be cured? or who can heal my infirmities but he, that for me, and mankind, came down from Heaven, that they may be healed of their griefs? who can quicken but he that can mortify, and quicken all things? who can save, but thou O my God and Saviour? save me therefore, and quicken me, thou that art the life, and salvation everlasting, of all that put their trust in thee; and to thee that art without beginning, be glory without end: To thee be Praise and Honour, to thee be continual Worship, and thanksgiving; thou art the everlasting Spring of mercy, for I was gone far from thee, and did run away, and yet thou dost speedily come to him that is sick, and doth run away, when he doth call upon thee, and dost grant his health before thou hearest his sighs; for to be willing to be healed is enough that thou shouldest heal, and to be willing to live, that thou shouldest grant life; and in the blessings of thy sweetness dost prevent the desires of a sinner that doth know himself; therefore I will say unto thee, I know my iniquity, and what it is to know, because all my bones are vexed within me, and my soul is very much troubled for my sin.  
Behold! I lay all my iniquities before thy sight, O my God, that thou mightest heal and cure my soul, because it hath sinned against thee: for thou art a God that desirest not the death of a sinner, but rather that he should be converted and live; for the dead shall not praise thee, O Lord, but we that live do bless thee, O Lord, and do confess that thy mercy is everlasting, and thy compassions never fail.   

CHAP. V.  
I Have revealed my miseries to thee, O Lord, not to make known my ways unto thee, that didst not know them all from the beginning, and hast numbered all my steps; for thou knowest the hidden places of darkness, and all things are naked open to thy eye; and thou dost not only see, but discern the lurking places of our thoughts, and the marrow of our affections: but I uncover, that thou mayest cover and protect: I reveal, that thou mayst hid and give me an humble and contrite spirit, and by the offering of this sacrifice, which is most acceptable unto thee, be merciful unto me, and forgive me my sins. I have spoken many and great things, and yet said little; for the worm of my conscience doth prick me in more: I would to God it might draw away the rottenness, that by grieving it might consume it, and withal be itself consumed: but woe is me, for when I think I have made an end of telling my evils, then am I constrained, as it were, to begin again, and my memory being full of uncleanness, doth abundantly remember much more filthiness; for I have sinned above the number of the sands of the seas; and if I had a hundred tongues, and a hundred mouths, I shall scarce answer one of a thousand thousand; yet that increaseth all my grief, that I cannot remember all my filthiness past, and the fleshly corruptions of my soul; for while I forget new sins I forget the old, but those that I remember I will not hid, not that I will love them again more, but that I may love thee more earnestly, O my God, and that I remembering my wicked ways in the bitterness of my remembrance, thou mayest be sweet unto me by the pardon of them: But I have not purged the old, but rather from them did spring up many new sins, for the which I am as it were cast out from before thy face, O my God; and being deprived of the comfort of thy presence, I fall almost into desperation, knowing not whither I go; and who will look upon my face, if thou turn away from me, and as a Reprobate deprive me of thy sight, I shall undoubtedly become hateful unto all men, and as a wanderer, and a runagate in the Land, I shall be made a slave unto them, when they shall ask of me, where is thy God? and wherefore hath he put thee from him? what shall I do therefore, O wretched man that I am? or what shall I say when I see myself estranged from thy protection, and forsaken in the midst of my enemies that fight mightily against me? I will seek thy face, O Lord, and with sighs and tears beseech thee not to leave me, nor in anger to departed from thy servant; for all mine enemies follow me as a fugitive to destroy my soul: and therefore I must seek refuge at thy hands to whom I fly, O my God, my strength, my health, my refuge, in the day of tribulation: for as there is no God besides thee, so there is no Saviour besides thee. Thou therefore, O Lord, that knowest all my miseries, and from whom the works of my weakness are not hidden, cast behind thy back all my offences, and do not remember all my old iniquities, but save me according to thy mercy from all those that persecute me, and deliver me because there is none can redeem me and save me, but thou, O Lord, who savest all that trust in thee, and deliverest the poor from the mighty, and from the hands of them that are stronger than he. Hid not therefore thy face from me, O Lord, neither despise me, my saving God, my strength, and my deliverer; for I am poor and in misery, and thine eyes look upon the poor: and if thy justice seek me, hid me in the bosom of thy mercy, wherein thou hast with long suffering been with me, and invited me to repentance; for thou art long suffering, and very patiented, and exceeding merciful above all my wickedness; yea nothing is more proper to thee, O Lord, then to spare, and therefore thou hast mercy upon all, and drawest the sons of men to repentance, because thou canst do all, and thou sparest all, because they are thine, O Lord, thou lovest souls; turn me therefore unto thee, and deliver my poor afflicted soul from danger, that my mouth may be filled with thy praise, and say unto thee, Blessed be thou, O Lord, who hast not suffered me to be delivered into the hands of my adversaries; except thou, O Lord, hadst been my Helper, they had swallowed me up quick: my soul as a sparrow was delivered from the snare of the Fowler; the snare is broken, and I am delivered.   

CHAP. VI  
O Wretched man that I am! what shall do? for the great wild Beast hath almost devoured my soul, and I have been made a prey to the enemy: he hath spoilt me of all those goods wherewith thou, O Lord, hast beautified me, and I am afraid to appear before thee; I departed rich and beautiful from thy face, and went wand'ring after filthiness in a corrupt way, and in the wickedness of my heart my soul is made black, and the excellent colour thereof is changed, and I have so impoverished and deformed myself by wearing the foul garment of sin, (according to the likeness of Adam's offence) as thou O Lord, wilt not know me, according to the image wherein thou hast created me, and wilt not suffer me (as a scabbed sheep) to dwell among the sheep of thy pasture: How then shall I presume to return to the presence of thy Divine Majesty, in whose sight the Heavens are not clean, but empty, vile, and unclean? or how shall I presume to communicate amongst thy chosen people, being made foolish by offending: I desire to return unto thee, though ashamed, and afraid, trusting to thy mercy, for thou art a sweet Father to thy Son that did travel into a fare Country; be more sweet to him when he returneth from a long pilgrimage: O my God, I want power to come to thee, for I am kept fast bound by a most cruel robber, not with strong iron, but with iron of my own will, whereof the enemy hath made a chain for me, and bringeth my heart into sorrow, slavery, and bitterness: my refuge is far from me, for salvation is far from sinners, and I am compelled to die in most miserable bondage, unless thou, O Lord, looking down from Heaven, dost help me: I stick fast in the slimy filth of the earth, and a tempest of temptations, even like the waus of the cruel sea, hath overwhelmed me, and almost drowned me, so that I am in despair of avoiding these eminent dangers, unless thou, O Lord, shalt take me up; for the more I endeavour to rise, the more I am bruised; I am both within and without troublesome to myself, and every where I do find domestic enemies that do beat me down; I look on the right hand, and on the left, and see none to whom I may commit myself in safety, but every where fear doth shake me, and to whomsoever I come, I find not a faithful friend; and how should I find any, when myself do not keep my faith given to my God? I have sought means to comfort me in my afflictions, and calamities, and there was none of my dear friends that would comfort me, but I met with friends that were full of words, nay dumb rather, and therefore dumb, O my God, because thy word did not sound from their lips, who did condemn my wants without Compassion, and did falsely provoke strife against me: I have often consented to foolish deceivers, and swerving from the right Path, I ignorant agreed to their opinions, and by little and little was brought to such toys, and madness, as though by the help of thy Grace, I never departed from thy true Religion, yet I did believe in many fables, which makes me unexcusable; for that when I knew thee to be always a God in truth, I did not worship thee in spirit, and in truth, but changed this truth into lies, and served the creature, rather than the Creator, and sought myself, and my pleasures in corruptible things: But thou, O Lord, and my Saviour, proceed on, and as thou hast made me by true faith to acknowledge thee, awaken me up from the sleep of sin, that I never sleep unto death: lighten, kindle, and lift up my heart unto thee, that in thy light I may behold the everlasting light, the unquenchable light that never faileth, the sweet and delightful light, that I may see, and rejoice, and covet that light, and to know, that nothing is to be loved besides thee, but in thee, and for thee: Thou, O Lord, art the true light that dost illuminate all men coming unto thee; cause this light to rise in my darkness, and make me to desire to see thy salvation, that my soul being melted away with the force of love, may attain to thy saving health, and thirst after thy delights: My soul I say, but let me not call it thine, because thou didst make it, and give i● unto me, and mine because I receiced it from thee: keep therefore thy creature, which thou hast especially framed according to thine own Image, and suffer not thy precious gift which thou hast purchased with thy most precious blood to perish; but upon my body and members work what it pleaseth thee; let my flesh be clothed with rottenness, and my bones consumed with worms; but I beseech thee, O Lord, only to spare my soul, and stretch not out thy hand against it, but bring me back again into the way, before the going down of the Sun, for it groweth towards the evening of my age, wherefore compel me to come unto thee, if to call be too little; compel me as it pleaseth thee, so I may come, and not perish; not for myself, who have so often abused thy mercy, and made myself unworthy thereof, but for thy holy name sake, take from me a stony heart, and give unto me a heart of flesh, and place thy spirit in the midst of me, that I may walk in thy Precepts, and keep thy Judgements: I come too late unto thee, O Lord, I confess, I would to God I had come sooner; but I know, and am assured that thou prescribest no time to those that come, so they come at last, and thou receivest the last as gently as thou dost the first: for although thou hatest sin, yet thou hatest not the sinner; neither dost thou rejoice in his destruction: therefore though he tarry long before his conversion, yet thou dost patiently look for him: O how sweet and pleasant is that saying wherewith thou hast given hope and comfort to my soul! thou hast played the harlot with many lovers, yet return thou unto me and I will receive thee: How delightful and pleasant is that word wherewith thou comfortest sinners that are in despair of themselves I if a sinner repent him for all his sins, he shall live and not die; for the death of a sinner is not thy will, for with great joy I hear thee, when thou sayest that the sheep that had gone astray, shall be brought home upon the Shepherd's shoulders, and that the groat shall be laid up in the treasures; the neighbours rejoicing with the woman that found it, and the joy of the solemnity of that house did force tears from me, when I read of the younger son that was dead, and lived again: Therefore give, O Lord, unto my soul the voice of thy virtue; and not of thy virtue alone which shaketh off the sleep of souls; but also the beams of thy light which doth show to men their sins, but giveth light also to the hidden places of darkness: Let thy voice sound in the years of my heart, and say unto my sleeping soul, why art thou so long oppressed with a deadly sleep, and kept in Captive bonds? It is now time that thou forsake thy sins, and to return to thy Maker that Redeemed thee: Return, O thou Shunamite, return, that I may behold thee to return, and defer no longer to come to me; for I am the Lord thy God that calleth thee; I am he that blotteth out thine iniquities for myself, neither carry in remembrance things past: Then will I say boldly to my soul, turn thee to thy rest for the Lord hath done well unto thee; go safely unto him, and though thou be weary in thy wicked ways, go on the swifter in the ways of goodness, that thou mayest the sooner take rest; be not made afraid for thy sins, for if they be as red as scarlet, they shall be made as white as snow; as a Cloud they shall be put away; and fear not to be accused of boldness, where thou art praised for obedience: Go, and make haste, O my soul unto him that came not to call the righteous but sinners; and if thou art a sinner, thy God is the God of sinners, wherefore dost thou fear to go, thou that art not called of a cruel Judge, but by the Father of mercy, that thou mayest obtain mercy: therefore go now willingly, being called to mercy, that thou be not hereafter compelled to go unto judgement. In thee, O Lord, do I trust, wherefore I will not be ashamed to confess unto thee my deformities, and blasphemies, who was not ashamed to confess them before men, and to bark against thee: Let the Pharises murmur and say, who can forgive sins but God alone? for it is God that speaketh unto me, and to whosoever that putteth his trust in him; he that calleth me is mild, and pitiful, and in his wrath remembreth mercy; and therefore upon thy words will I assuredly come unto thee, O my God, my trust and my portion, in the Land of the living; I will come and fall down before thee, and not fear thy Majesty, because thou callest me, and that I offend not thine eyes, when I shall appear unclean in thy sight, I will wash away my filthiness with continual tears, and my eyelids shall not rest from weeping, but my bed shallbe privy to my sorrow, wherein I hope to please thee, though I displease myself, and being by thee converted unto thee, I repent me of those things that I have committed against thee, that I may praise thee with a clear heart, saying, O Lord, who is like unto thee? for than is thy praise seemly in the mouth of a Sinner, and he that hath sowed in tears, shall reap in gladness.   

CHAP. VII.  
HAve mercy upon me, O Lord, for I am in trouble, and vexed with unspeakable miseries; for floods of iniquity do vex me, and the waters have entered into my soul, as a River that is overflown: for my sins which I have hitherto dissembled, and much neglected to confess and amend, are grown so high that they have passed over my head, and bowed my mind and will to the concupiscence of sensual desires, yea made me subject to the slavery of the Devil: Woe be unto me, for I am mortally wounded, and there is no health in me, from the crown of my head, to the sole of my foot: for my enemy hath supplanted me, and as a most cruel tyrant tormented me, and hath deprived me of all my senses, leaving only my understanding, thereby joining the knowledge of my hurt and loss, that he might also increase my sorrows: he had done little hurt if he had deprived me of the use of all my senses, and had made me utterly senseless in all my actions; but he hath deprived me thereof for doing that which is good, and hath violently enforced me unto evil, and hath so infected my mind which is altogether bend towards things with a certain astonishment of inward senselessness, that she cannot feel her inward hurts: for when I should have heard, I was deaf, and turned my ears from the truth, when it had been fit for me to stop my ears from hearing unprofitable things, and the toys of many men, I was swift to hear and a gentle hearer: Heavenly things I tasted unsavoury, and my soul loathed all spiritual meats, but I judged earthly things sweeter than honey, or the honey comb: I was blind and an earthly man in beholding those things that were good, but worldly things I looked on with a proud eye, and desired them with an unsatiable heart: neither in my senses alone, but my members also which God gave me for the service of my soul, did the ancient enemy shut up from me the way of salvation, and prepared such cruel ambushes against me in this cruel siege, as I was never able to avoid them, and as often as I tried to fly away, I fell into his hands: for I did offend both by seeing and refusing to see, by hearing and by being deaf, by speaking and holding my peace; to conclude, I changed all the peculiar and common use of my senses, and members, into a filthy abuse, burning in my unclean desires, for that I have transgressed all the Laws both of God and man, and Nature, and have lived diligently only observing the laws of sin. I would to God I had been only so, and now were not, but alas! because I am the same that before I was, and nothing changed from that, I followed the worst, for my sick will doth yet bear rule, and my most soul and stinking soul that is filled every where with horrible sores that doth proceed only from itself, doth still persevere in the old evils. I am often angry with myself, because I am weary to live, when I am not weary to sin; I know my folly, and am confounded, and being confounded I reproove myself saying; O carnal lover, why dost thou so long walk in the mire of concupiscence? why art thou so carefully busy for earthly things, and dost so earnestly desire those goods that shall perish? or by what reason callest thou them goods which thou gainest with so much labour, and the great hurt of thy soul, and being gained possessest in fear, and being possessed losest with grief and sorrow? O my soul! why dost thou forget thy own proper estate and nobility, and art not ashamed to endure a miserable and shameful bondage under the corruption of thy corporal sense? why art thou deceived with the unfaithful promises of the world? the chiefest good whereof is a mist, or vapour, that appeareth but a little season, and vanisheth as vanity of vanities: Blush, and be ashamed, O miserable sinner; how often hast thou departed from thy Creator, and turned to deceitful creatures? and coming again to thyself, behold with the sight of thy mind, how cruelly thy soul hath bowelled herself of her own bowels, whilst with an inordinate desire catching at a vile prize of Flies, she hath like the Spider made nets for her own self, of her own bowels: again, and again, I say, blush at that where thou hast had no fruit, and lament thy lost time, and yield thy soul unto God: with these speeches I rail against myself, when being inwardly admonished, I enter into myself, and consider with my heart, what I have lost, and what I have found: and I find that I do not that good which I like, but the evil that I will that I do; for my Enemies hold my will and do keep me, (being fashioned according to the former desires of ignorance) captive under the law of sin: but thou, O Lord of virtues, and the tower of my strength, do not withdraw thy help from me; look, Lord, unto my defence, and protect me under thy wings, left I fall in the sight of my adversaries, and my enemies rejoicing against me say, I have prevailed against him: Break the bonds of my reproach under which I have been made crooked; and lose the cords of my sins wherewith I am strongly bound, O most mighty Lord, and make known thy power to thy enemies, that I may offer unto thee a sacrifice of gladness, saying, who shall speak to the power of the Lord, or what shall declare his praises, that delivereth my soul from death, and my feet from sliding? who hath saved me from the Lion's mouth, and from the devouring Dragon. To whom shall I fly but to thee, O Lord, upon whom all our Fathers have called, and have been saved? to thee I say, who never deceivest them that trust in thee, and let any man's hand be against me, for I will fear no evil, because thou art with me: O Lord, all my desires are before thee, blot out, and put away whatsoever is displeasing unto thee; renew, create, and confirm whatsoever thou hast given me; that casting away all carnal and unprofitable desires, the sinner may be accepted in the desires of his heart, and coveting to enjoy thee the only treasure, my request may come before thy face, and I may be confident to say unto thee, Grant unto me, O God, the desire of my soul; for I know, and am assured, that no man can desire thee but by thyself, nor come to thee unless thou draw him: draw me therefore, O Lord, and grant unto me that I may begin in a good desire, that I may end and perfect it in a good work, before my old custom oppress my new desires, and my former will strengthened by age, conquer my new will: clothe me therefore, O Lord, I humbly beseech thee, in the precious garment of thy salvation, and put off the vile clothing of my wicked life, wherein being deprived of thee, I walk according to the ancient conversation of the old man, but being newly clothed in thee, and become a new man, I may with a new spirit serve thee in a new life, and in the sweet smell of thy ointments running unto thee I may rejoice in Jesus my Saviour.   

CHAP. VIII.  
O Lord Jesus Christ, the son of the living God, who with thy hands stretched forth on the Cross, hast drunk the cup of thy Passion for the redemption of all mankind, secure me this day, I beseech thee; behold, O Lord, I that am needy, do come to thee that art wealthy: I that am full of misery do approach to thee replenished with mercy; suffer me not therefore to departed void, or as one worthy to be despised; I begin hungry, let me not end empty, I approach as one hunger starved, let me nor departed unfed, and if I sigh before I eat, grant that I may eat at least after I have sighed; first therefore, O blessed Saviour, I confess against myself mine iniquity; behold, O Lord, for that I was conceived and born in sin, and thou hast washed and sanctified me from the same, and I after this have defiled myself with greater offences, because those sins wherein I was borne, were of necessity; but those in which I afterward lay wallowing were voluntary: this notwithstanding, thou not being unmindful of thy mercy and goodness, hast drawn me from wickedness, and from the fellowship of sinners, inspiring me with thy grace to follow thee in the company of those that seek thy face, who walk the direct way that leadeth to felicity: but I ungrateful and forgetful of so many benefits received, have after my entrance into a Religious way, committed many sins and abominations, and where I ought to have amended my faults, and to have repent for them, in stead thereof I have added sin upon sin: these, O Lord, are the faults by which I have dishonoured thee, and defiled myself; to wit, Pride, Presumption, Vainglory, and Hypocrisy, and many other sins almost infinite, by which my unhappy soul is troubled and afflicted, rend, and destroyed: Behold, O Lord, mine iniquities have overwhelmed my head, being unto me a grievous burden unsupportable to be endured, insomuch as if thou (whose property is to pardon and to show mercy) do not lift me up with the right hand of thy mercy, I shall woefully sink down into the gulf of eternal misery: behold, O Lord God, and see how my ghostly enemy doth insult over me, saying, God hath forsaken him; I will pursue and take him, because there is none that can deliver him: how long, O Lord, wilt thou thus leave me? turn back, and deliver my soul, O save me for thy mercy sake: take pity of me thy son whom thou hast begotten in the great grief of thy passion, and do not so look to my wickedness, that thou forget thy goodness: what Father is there that seeing his son in danger, doth not endeavour to set him free? or what son is there whom his Father doth refuse to correct with the staff of his pity? wherefore, O Lord, and Father, albeit I am a sinner, yet I do not cease to be thy Son, because thou hast made me, and new made me again; like as I have sinned, so correct me and amend me, commit me to the care and custody of thy only begotten Son Jesus Christ our Lord: Is it possible for a woman to forget the child of her own womb? and albeit she should forget it, yet thou, O most merciful Father, hast promised not to forget the same: Behold I cry, and thou dost not hear me; I am afflicted with grief, and thou dost not comfort me; what shall I do or say, being in this extreme misery? alas, I am altogether comfortless, and which is worse, am chased from thy presence: wretch that I am, from how great good into how great evil am I fallen? whither did I attempt to go? and whither am I come? where am I? and where am I not? how is it that I that did sigh after Heaven, do now sigh through so great tribulation? I have sought comfort, and have found affliction, and truly it is better for me not to be, then to be without thee, O sweet Saviour, It is better not to live, then to live without thee, the only true life; where are now, O Lord Jesus, thine accustomed mercies? wilt thou be displeased with me always? be appeased, I beseech thee, and take pity of me, and turn not away thy loving face from me, who to redeem me, hast not turned away thy face from those that did mock, and spit upon thee: I confess that I have sinned, and my conscience doth adjudge me worthy of damnation, neither is my repentance sufficient to make satisfaction, nevertheless it is a thing infallible, that thy mercy doth surmount all offences whatsoever, be it never so abominable: wherefore, O most merciful Lord, I beseech thee enter not into judgement with thy servant, but according to the multitude of thy mercies blot out mine iniquities: woe be to me at the day of judgement, when the Books of our Consciences shall be opened, wherein our actions are registered, when of me it shall be openly proclaimed; see here the man and his deeds committed; what shall I do, O Lord my God, at that dreadful day when the Heavens shall reveal my iniquities, and the earth shall bear witness against me? verily I shallbe mute, and able to say nothing, but holding down my head through shame and confusion, I shall stand before thee shaking and blushing; alas! what shall I say? I will call and cry unto thee, O Lord my God, why am I consumed being silent? nevertheless if I speak, my grief will not cease; and if I hold, I shall inwardly be tormented with unspeakable bitterness: weep, O my soul, and make lamentation, as a young married woman for the death of her new married husband; weep, and bewail thy misery for that thy Bridegroom (which is Christ) hath forsaken thee: O anger of the Almighty rush not upon me, because thou canst not be contained in me; verily there is nothing in me that is able to contain thee; take pity of me, lest I despair of thy mercy, that by despairing of myself, I may find comfort in thee; and albeit I have done that for which thou mayest justly condemn me, yet thou hast not lost thy accustomed property of showing mercy and pity: thou, O Lord, dost not desire the death of sinners, neither dost thou take pleasure in the perdition of those that die; nay rather that those that were dead might live: Thou thyself hast died, and thy death hath been the death of that death that was due to sinners: and if thou dying, they have lived, grant, O Lord, I beseech thee, that thou living, I may not die; let thy heavenly hand help me, and deliver me from the hands of those that hate me, lest they insult and rejoice over me, saying, we have devoured him: How is it possible, O blessed Saviour, that ever any one can despair of thy mercy, who when we were thy enemies hast redeemed us with thy most precious blood, and reconciled us to God? Behold, O Lord, (protected with the shadow of thy mercy) I run (craving pardon) to the throne of thy glory, calling, and knocking until thou take pity on me; for if thou hast called as to pardon, even when we did not seek it, by how much more shall we obtain pardon if we ask it? remember not thy justice, O blessed Saviour, towards me thy creature; remember not thine anger towards me guilty, but be mindful of thy mercy towards me in misery: forget my Pride, provoking thee to displeasure, and weigh my wretchedness imploring thy favour; for what doth thy sacred Name Jesus signify but only a Saviour? wherefore, O Saviour Jesus, be thou my succour, and protection, and say unto my soul, I am thy salvation: I do presume very much of thy divine bounty, because thou thyself dost teach us to ask, seek, and knock at the door of thy mercy; wherefore I do ask, seek, and knock at thy door, as by thy word thou hast commanded me to do: thou therefore that willest me to ask, grant that I may receive; thou that dost bid me seek, grant me likewise to find; thou that dost teach me to knock, open unto me knocking at the door of thy mercy: recover me being diseased, repair me being crazed, raise me being dead; vouchsafe likewise so to direct and govern all my senses, thoughts, and actions in that which is pleasing unto thee, that I may from henceforth faithfully serve thee, and that I may live, and give myself wholly unto thee: I know, O Lord, that by reason thou hast made me, I do owe myself unto thee; and by reason thou hast redeemed me, and hast been made man for me, I do owe (if I had it to give thee) much more than myself unto thee, by how much greater than me, thou art; who hast given thyself for me: I have nothing else to give thee; neither can I give thee this without thee: take me therefore, and draw me unto thee, that I m●y be thine by imitation, and affection, like as I am by condition, and creation.   

CHAP. IX.  
TAke pity, O Lord, take pity, O merciful Saviour of me a most miserable sinner, doing things worthy of blame, and worthily suffering for the same, being by thee daily afflicted, for that continually I am found to offend: if I ponder the evil which I daily commit, that which I endure is nothing in comparison of it; that which I have done, being much more grievous than my affliction: thou art just, O Lord, and right is thy judgement: all thy judgements are just and true: thou, O Lord our God, art just and full of goodness, neither is there in thee any wickedness: because when we do offend, thou dost not unjustly and cruelly afflict us, who when we were not, hast powerfully made us; and when for our sins we were guilty of damnation, thou hast by thy wonderful mercy and goodness, set us in a state of salvation: I know, O Lord God, and am assured, that our life is not governed by the unadvised Influence and concurrence of secondary causes, but is wholly disposed and ordered by thy Almighty providence; wherefore I humbly pray and beseech thee, that thou wilt not deal with me according to mine iniquities, by which I have deserved thy anger, but according to thy manifold mercies, which surmount the sins of the whole world, take pity on me: thou, O Lord, who dost punish me outwardly, give me always an invincible, patience inwardly, to the end I may never cease to praise thee: take pity of me, O Lord, take pity of me, and help me, like as thou knowest to be expedient for me both in soul and in body, thou who knowest all things, and art able to do all things whatsoever it pleaseth thee.   

CHAP. X.  
O God most powerful and potent over the spirits or souls of all flesh, whose eyes behold all the ways of the children of Adam, from the day of their birth, unto the day of their death; to the end thou mayst render to every man according to his actions, be they good or evil: Teach me, I beseech thee, how to confess unto thee my poverty, because I have heretofore vaunted that I was rich, and need nothing, not knowing that I was poor, blind, naked, wretched, and in misery, for that I thought myself to be something, when I was nothing; I said with myself, I shall become a wise man, and I became a fool; I thought myself to be prudent and discreet, and I was deceived, for that I now perceive that it is a gift gratis by thee given, without whom we can do nothing; thus, O Lord, by leaving me, and proving me, thou hast taught me to know myself, not to respect of ti●e, that thou mightst know me, but in respect of me, that I might know myself, because I thought myself to be something of myself, and sufficient of myself; neither did I perceive that it was thou that didst govern me, until thou didst for a while forsake me; whereupon I forthwith fell, by which I did see and know, that it was thou that didst govern me, and that my fall happened through my own fault, and my … ing to grace, by means only of thy grace.  
Thou hast opened mine eyes, O divine light, thou hast awakened and enlightened me, so that now I see that man's life is a temptation upon earth; neither hath frail flesh, or any mortal man living, just occasion to glory of himself before thee, or to presume of his justification, since all the good we have, be it little or great, proceedeth wholly and freely from thee; neither can we attribute any thing justly to ourselves, saving only our iniquity.  
Whereof then shall any mortal man glory? shall he glory of his iniquity? this is not glory, but mere misery: shall he therefore glory of his goodness? shall he glory of that which is another's? Because all goodness and glory is thine, O Lord, and belongeth unto thee; he therefore that usurpeth that glory to himself that is due to thee, is a thief, and a robber, and like unto the Devil, who desired to bereave thee of thy glory; for he that desireth to be praised in respect of the gift which thou hast given him, and doth not seek thy glory therein, but his own, albeit in respect of thy gift he be praised of men, yet by thee be is thought worthy of blame, for that with that gift which thou hast given him, he hath not sought thy glory, but his own; but he that is praised of men, being by thee thought worthy of blame, will not be defended by men when thou shalt condemn him.  
Thou therefore, O Lord, who didst form me in my mother's womb, permit me not to fall into that reproachful infamy, as to be upbraided as one that would bereave thee of thy glory, who art the author of all goodness, and to thee is due all glory, but to us shame and misery, who according to our deserts, are worthy of all wretchedness, were it not that thou dost take pity upon us: Thou, O Lord, art pitiful indeed, full of compassion towards all men, and hating nothing of those things which thou hast made bestowing on us many benefits, & enriching us with thy greatest gifts, because thou dost favour those that are friendless, making them abound with the riches of thy goodness.  
I know, O Lord, and confess that they only that acknowledge themselves to be poor and needy, and confess unto thee their poverty, shallbe enriched by thee; insomuch that they that imagine themselves rich (being indeed poor and needy) are not to expect any spiritual gift or grace from thee: wherefore, O Lord my God, I do acknowledge and confess unto thee my poverty, rendering unto thee all glory, because all the good that is done by me, proceedeth wholly from thee.  
I confess, O Lord, that I am nothing else but mere vanity, the shadow of death, a dark bottomless dungeon, a void and unprofitable plot of ground, bringing forth nothing without thy blessing, the natural fruit thereof being confusion, sin, and eternal death and damnation: all the good that ever I had before, I had it from thee, is wholly thine, and proceeds from the hands of thy liberality.  
When I have stood upright, it hath been by thy assistance; when I have fallen, it hath been through my own negligence: when I was fallen likewise, I should for ever have remained in misery, if thou hadst not raised me: and being blind, I should for ever have been blind, if thou hadst not enlightened me: when I was fallen, I should never have risen, if thou hadst not with thy hand raised me: yea after thou hadst raised me, I should have fallen immediately, if thou hadst not upheld me; I should likewise have perished many times, and been utterly undone, if thou hadst not governed me.  
Thus, O Lord, and in this manner hath thy grace and mercy prevented me from time to time, and continually delivering me from all mishaps that might have befallen me, preserving me from perils that are past, delivering me out of those that are present, and strengthening me against those that are to come, cutting in sunder before me the snares of sin, removing likewise all causes and occasions of the same; for if thou hadst not afforded me this favour, I should have committed all sorts of sins what soever: because I know, O Lord, that there is no sin committed by one man, which another could not likewise do the same, if man's Creator by whom he was made, do not assist him.  
Thou therefore hast caused, and commanded me to abstain from iniquity, giving me grace that I might believe in thee: for thou, O Lord, didst direct me to do that which was to thy glory and my own salvation; giving me grace and understanding, that I might avoid many grievous sins that I was inclinable to.   

CHAP. XI.  
REmember, O Lord I beseech thee thy mercies showed towards me of old time, through which thou hast prevented me with the blessings of thy sweetness, even from the beginnings for thou, O Lord, and my hope, from the very time that I was a suckling, (yea before I was borne) hast provided and prepared the ways that I should walk in, and by them attain to the glory of thy heavenly Kingdom: thou hast known me before thou didst form me in my mother's belly; and before I issued out of my mother's womb, thou hast preordained of me whatsoever seemed good to thy divine pleasure.  
I know not, O Lord, what things are written of me in thy Book, in the secret of thy Consistory, which make me to fear exceedingly: but thou knowest them all particularly, because that which I expect by succession of days and times, a thousand years hence to be fulfilled, in the sight of thy Eternity is already accomplished, and that which is to come is already done: but I, for that I know not these things, (living here in a dark and obscure night) cannot but fear and tremble, whilst I see sundry dangers on every side assaulting me, troops of enemies pursuing me, and infinite miseries of this life environing me. And were it not that the aid of thy grace doth secure me in these my manifold tribulations, I should soon fall into desperation; but I have a great hope and confidence, O my God in thee, who art a God of unspeakable mercy and pity: and the consideration of thy infinite mercies are no small comfort unto me in my miseries.  
The former tokens likewise of thy love and mercies showed towards me before my nativity, but appearing now especially, do put me in hope for the time to come, to receive more ample and greater favours, from the hands of thy bountiful liberality, which thou dost reserve for thy friends, and those that love thee to the end, that my hope may rejoice in thee, O Lord my God, with a sacred and lively cheerfulness, with which thou dost continually comfort my old disconsolate years.   

CHAP. XII.  
O God of Gods! O Lord in mercy surmounting the malice of men; I know thou wilt not always be silent: then I mean when a flaming fire shall burn before thee, and a terrible tempest shall shower down round about thee, when thou shalt call both Heaven and earth to judge and discern thy people; and lo, in the presence of so many millions of people, all mine iniquities shall be revealed, before so many troops of Angels all my abominations shall be displayed; not only of my actions, but likewise of my words, and cogitations; there shall I (poor wretch) stand to be judged by so many as have gone before me in doing good: I shall by so many accusers be thought worthy of Hell, as have given me example to live well: I shall be convinced by so many witnesses, as have admonished me by their wholesome speeches, and by their godly & pious conversation, have carried themselves worthy of imitation: O my Lord! I know not what to say, I know not what to answer: and albeit I am as yet free from that terrible danger, nevertheless my conscience doth afflict me, the hidden secrets of my heart do torment me, covetousness doth press me, pride doth accuse me, envy doth consume me, concupiscence doth inflame me, lust doth molest me, gluttony doth disgrace me, drunkenness doth convince me, detraction doth rend me, anger doth disturb me: behold, O my deliverer, who hast delivered me out of the hands of cruel people; behold with whom I have lived from the day of my birth, with whom I have studied, and with whom I have kept promise: those very studies which heretofore I affected, do condemn me, which in times past I praised do now dispraise me. These are the friends to whom I have assented; the teachers whom I have obeyed; the masters whom I have served; the counsellors whom I have believed, and the familiar acquaintance to whom I have consented  
Woe is me, O my God, for that my abode here is prolonged, woe is me, O my light, for that I have lived with those that live in darkness: and seeing holy David said so much, how much more may I be able to say? my soul hath dwelled too long in a strange land? O my God, my force & my fortress, no man can be justified in thy sight, my hope is not in the sons of men. Whom wouldst thou find justified, if thou shouldest judge severely, setting mercy aside? neither is there any thing whereof a just man may vaunt, or which can bring him to glory, unless thou prevent him before hand with thy mercy, and pity: I therefore, O my Saviour, believe what I have heard, that it is thy goodness that doth draw me to repentance, thy holy lips have told it me: No man can come to me, unless my Father, who hath sent me, draw him. Seeing therefore it hath pleased thee to instruct me, and by instruction hast vouchsafed mercifully to inform me; I beseech thee, with all the forces of my heart and mind, O Almighty Father, together with thy most beloved Son, I beseech thee likewise, O most blessed Saviour, with the holy and blessed Spirit, vouchsafe to draw me unto thee, that I may run after thee, and forsaking all things transitory, I may only adhere unto thee, and devote my soul and body only to thy service.  
Who is like unto thee, O Lord my God? thou art great in sanctity, terrible, and worthy to be praised, doing things that deserve to be admired; too too late have I known thee, O true light, too late have I known thee, and the cause was, for that there was a great and dark cloud before my eyes, that delighted in vanity, which hindered me from beholding the Sun of justice, and the Light of all verity: I was wrapped in darkness, being the child of darkness, & I loved darkness, because I knew not the light; I was blind and loved blindness, and walked through one darkness into another: who hath delivered me from thence, where I remained as a blind man, sitting in darkness and in the shadow of death? who hath taken me by the hand, and led met forth of the same? who is he that hath thus enlightened me? I sought him not, and he called me: but who is he? thou art he. O Lord my God, being most merciful, and pitiful, yea, the father of mercies, and God of all comfort.  
Thou, O Lord my God most holy, art he that hath done the same, whom I confess with my whole heart, rendering thanks to thy holy Name: I did not seek thee, thou hast sought me; I did not call upon thee, thou hast called me.  
Thou hast thundered from Heaven with a great voice into the internal care of my heart, saying, let light be made; and light was made: whereupon that great and dark cloud, which had covered my eyes, departed, and was dissolved, whereby I have seen thy light, and known thy voice, & I said, truly, O Lord, thou art my God, who hast delivered me out of darkness, and from the shadow of death, calling me into the admirable light, so that now I see, thanks be to thee, O Lord, who hast enlightened me: and I looked bacl, and beheld the darkness wherein I had lived, and the deep dark dungeon, wherein I had remained, which made me with fear and trembling, to cry out, saying, woe is me in respect of the darkness in which I have remained; woe is me in respect of my former blindness, in which I could not see the light of Heaven; woe is me in respect of my former ignorance, when I did not know thee, O Lord; thanks therefore be to thee, O my Inlightner, and Deliverer, for that thou hast enlightened me, and I have known thee.  
Too too late have I known thee, O ancient Verity, too late have I known thee, O eternal Truth: thou remainest in light, and I in darkness, and I knew thee not, because I could not be enlightened without thee, for that there is no light besides thee.  
O God the Holy of Holies, the God of Gods, and Lord of Lords, of inestimable Majesty, whose wonderful greatness cannot be uttered or imagined! before whom the Angelical powers do shake for fear, O most mighty, most holy, and most powerful God, the God of the spirits or souls of all mortal creatures, from whose sight the Heavens and the earth do fly away for fear, to whom all the elements do obey at a beck; let all thy creatures adore and glorify thee, amongst whom I, unworthy wretch the son of thy handmaid do bow down the neck of my heart under the feet of thy supreme Majesty being taught so to do, by the faith which thou hast given me, rendering thanks unto thee, for that thou hast vouchsafed by thy mercy to enlighten me.  
O Light most true, sacred, and delightful, most worthy of praise, and most admirable, which enlighteneth every man coming into this world, yea, the eyes of the Angels themselves: Behold, now I see, for which I humbly thank thee: Behold, now I see the light of Heaven, a heavenly bright beam proceeding from the face of thy brightness doth shine upon the eyes of my mind, which maketh all my bones to rejoice.  
Oh that this light were perfect it me; increase it in me, O author o● light I beseech thee: increase I beseech thee that light that shineth in me: let it be augmented, I beseech thee, by thee.  
O fire, which dost always burn, and art never extinguished, inflame me. O light, which dost always shine, and art never darkened, enlighten me. Oh that I were made hot by thee, O sacred fire! how sweetly dost thou heat, how secretly dost thou shine, how desiredly dost thou burn? Woe be to those, that are not made hot by thee, woe be to those that are not enlightened by thee. O true light enlightening all the world, whose brightness doth replenish all the world. Woe be to those blind eyes which do not see thee, who art the Sun that giveth light both to Heaven and Earth. Woe be to those dim eyes which cannot see thee. Woe be to those eyes that are turned away from seeing verity. Woe be to those eyes that are not turned away from seeing vanity.  
Verily those eyes that are accustomed to darkness, cannot behold the bright beams of thy supreme righteousness, neither do they know what to think of the light, whose dwelling is in darkness. They see, love, and approve the darkness, so that walking from one darkness into another, they stumble, and tumble they know not whither. Doubtless they are wretched that know not what they lose, but they are more wretched that know what they lose, who fall with their eyes open, and descend alive into perdition.  
O light most blessed! who canst not be seen of those eyes that are never so little defiled: Blessed are the clean in heart, for they shall see God. Cleanse me, O cleansing virtue, cure mine eyes, to the end that with sound and clear eyes I may be able to behold thee. Remove from my eyes the scales of my former blindness, by the means of thy brightness, that I may be able steadfastly to behold thee, and in thy light I may see light.  
Behold O my light! now I see, for which I most humbly thank thee. Let this my light, O Lord I beseech thee, be increased by thee. Open mine eyes, that I may see the wonderful things of thy Law. I give thee thanks, O my light, for that I now see, albeit obscurely, as it were in a Mirror or looking glass: but when shall I see thee apparently face to face?  
Oh, when will that day of joy and mirth arrive, in which I shall enter into the place of thy Tabernacle, so mach to be admired, even into the house of my God, to the end I may see him face to face that seethe me▪ that so my desire may be accomplished.   

CHAP. XIII.  
I Have exceedingly sinned, and I know my offences to be many, which I have committed, yet I do not despair, because where sins have abounded, there grace hath superabounded. He that despaireth of obtaining pardon for his sins, denieth God to be merciful; he doth God a great injury that mistrusteth his mercy: as much as in him lieth, he denieth God to have charity, truth, and power, in which three doth depend my whole confidence: that is, in the charity of his adoption, in the truth of his promise, and in the power of his redemption: I cannot be terrified with the multitude of my sins▪ if the death of my Saviour come into my mind, because my sins cannot overcome the multitude of his mercy. The wounds of my Saviour do tell me that I am truly reconciled to him, if I love him: wherefore, blessed Saviour, give me grace to love thee truly and sincerely, because love chaseth forth fear: verily the whole world doth not afford such a powerful and present remedy against sin, as is the death of my Redeemer. He stretcheth forth his arms on the Cross, and spreads out his hands, as one ready to embrace sinners: I purpose to live, and desire to die between the arms of Christ that hath saved me, there will I sing securely: I will extol thee, O Lord, for thou hast received me, and hast not permitted mine enemies to triumph over me.  
Who more can crave  
Then God for me hath done?  
To free a slave  
That gave his only Son.  
Blessed be that hour  
When he repaired my loss,  
I never will  
Forget my Saviour's Cross:  
Whose death revives  
My soul; once was I dead,  
But now I'll raise  
Again my drooping head,  
And singing say,  
And saying sing for ever,  
Blessed be my Lord  
That did my soul deliver.   

CHAP. XIV.  
I Render unto the most humble thanks▪ O most gracious and merciful God, for that coming loader with so many and so grievous sins to make my humble confession unto thy divine and sacred Majesty, thou art pleased to give me the grace, that I am not ashamed to open my sins and iniquities unto thee, whereby I may obtain thy pardon; which being granted unto me by thy mercy, and the merits of my Saviour Christ Jesus; I most humbly beseech thee to endue me with thy holy spirit, that I may forget all my wicked inclinations, and that I may offend thee no more, but remain constant to my good intentions proposed at this time: I confess unto thee, O Lord, that it was thy mere mercy and goodness, that thou hadst not cut me off many times before this in the height of my horrid sins, and cast me immediately into Hell for all eternity: O Lord, thou hast had mercy upon me, being but poor dust and ashes; and thou art pleased at this instant to reform my deformities, and to keep me from sudden death and despair, lest I should be swallowed up in the deep: O Lord, I humbly confess, that before thou didst give me a sight of my sins, and hearty sorrow and repentance for them, I was going headlong to Hell, carrying all my sins along with me; but thou, O my Lord and my God, didst call me back unto thee, who art the way, the truth and the life, and didst enlighten my cloudy mind with the brightness of thy light, that seeing my relf at the brink of Hell, thou hast pulled me bacl by thy divine mercy and providence, that I may live to see thy glory: what shall I therefore render unto thee, my most merciful Saviour, for the marvellous ways that thou hast used to correct, and direct my ways into the way of salvation? I was carried away with vanities, O my God, and made my ways fare from thee; but thou, O Lord, moved with mercy didst call back my filthy life from the dirt of earthly pleasures, and didst restrain my untamed mind with the bit and bridle of the calamities, and labour of this wretched world, that I might understand my own misery, and come unto thee: I will therefore glory in my infirmities, and afflictions, that thy grace may dwell in me, O Lord, to whom I own all that I am, for that thou hast forgiven me many heinous, and grievous sins; and for those great benefits, and most holy blessings by which my poor soul shall be saved, I do give unto thee most humble thanks upon the knees of my heart, and in gratitude for thy gracious favours, I do most willingly offer my poor life to be sacrificed for thee, my liberty, and all my worldly substance, and my most humble prayers, saying, Bless the Lord, O my soul, and do not forget all his benefits, who is merciful to all thine iniquities, and healeth all thine infirmities, who hath redeemed thy life from death, who crowneth thee with loving kindnesses and tender mercies: Behold, O Lord, how I am comforted with thy mercies, and thou hast so enlightened me, that I now desire to embrace thee before all the pleasures which have waited upon my miserable life: therefore I humbly beseech thee, O most merciful Father, not to fail in helping me, that I also by thy grace may not fail in confessing thy mercy unto me; and I desire thee to accept of my broken and contrite heart, and my sorrowful soul for my sins past, and grant unto me thy fear, that I may never do any thing to displease thee; but conceiving hope by thy promises of thy mercy, I may henceforth be cherished, and delighted with heavenly things: O Lord, protect me under the shadow of thy wings, and cherish me in the bosom of thy mercy; for while I live in this valley of tears, I will cry unto thee, O my God, and my helper in time of trouble, and need, that thou deliver me from all temptations unto the end; and that thou wilt nourish me as thy child, who having received the strength of thy virtue so long as I shall run in the course of this world, forgetting that which is behind, and earnestly bending myself to thy holy blessings, by thy grace and protection I may go on to the appointed place that thou hast prepared for those that love Christ Jesus our Lord, who liveth and reigneth with thee in the unity of the Holy Spirit God world without end. Amen.    


A Preparative to Prayer.  

WHen to thy God thou speakest,  
O creature mean,  
Lift up pure hands,  
lay down all foul desires;  
Fix thoughts on heaven,  
present a conscience clean,  
Such holy Balm  
to mercy's throne aspires;  
Confess faults guilt,  
crave pardon for thy sin:  
Tread holy Paths,  
call grace to guide therein.   

It is the spirit,  
with reverence must obey  
Our Maker's will,  
to practise what he taught:  
Make not the flesh  
thy Council when thou pray,  
'Tis enemy  
to every virtuous thought:  
It is the foe  
we daily feed and cloth;  
It is the Prison  
that the soul doth loath,   

Even as Elias  
mounting to the sky,  
Did cast his mantle  
to the earth behind;  
So when the heart,  
presents the prayer on high,  
Exclude the world  
from traffic with the mind.  
Lips near to God,  
and ranging hearts within,  
Is but vain babbling,  
and converts to sin.   

Like Abraham,  
ascending up the Hill  
To sacrifice,  
his servants left below,  
That he might act  
the great Commanders Will,  
Without impeach  
to his obedient blow;  
Even for the soul  
remote from earthly things,  
Should mount salvations shelter,  
mercy's wings.   

Nothing more grateful  
in the highest eyes;  
Nothing more firm  
in danger to protect us:  
Nothing more forcible  
to pierce the skies,  
And not departed,  
till mercy do respect us;  
And as the soul  
life to the body gives:  
So prayer revives  
the soul, by prayer it lives.    

A Prayer.  
BEcause I have sinned, O Lord, and done wickedly in thy sight, and provoked thee to anger by my abominable wickedness, making my body which thou hast ordained as a vessel of thy honour, an instrument of most detestable filthiness, O Lord be merciful unto me, and pardon me this great wickedness: look not upon me, good Father, with the eyes of justice, neither do thou draw against me the sword of judgement; for now shall I that am but dust, stand in thy presence, when thy wrathful indignation cometh forth as a whirlwind, and thy heavy displeasure as a tempest, seeing the earth trembleth, the depths as discovered, and the very heavens are shaken when thou art angry? Exercise not therefore thy fury against me, that am but chaff before the wind, and as stubble before a flaming fire: though I have sinned grievously in thy sight, preferring my wicked desire before thy holy commandments, esteeming the pleasure of a moment before eternal and everlasting joys: nay which is worse making more account of vileness and vanity, and extreme folly and madness, then of the glory and majesty of the most excellent, wonderful, and blessed God, nothing dreading his displeasure, whose wrath maketh the Devils to quake, and burneth unquenchable unto the bottomless pit of hell: whose might is so great, that by the breath of his nostrils he can in the twinkling of an eye destroy a thousand worlds: yet am I bold prostrating myself before the throne of thy Majesty, hearty to beseech, and humbly to entreat thee, that thou wilt not deal with me according to my merits; for I have deserved that thou shouldst rain down fire and brimstone from out of heaven to devour me, or to open the earth under me, to swallow me up quick into hell: but thou art gracious and full of compassion, and rich in mercies, therefore do men put their trust under the shadow of thy wings. I have none in Heaven to fly unto but thee, nor in Earth of whom I may receive any comfort but at thy favourable hands, which are stretched out day and night to receive all that by earnest repentance turn to thee, being ready to ease all those that are laden with the burden of their sins, and to refresh their distressed consciences. In the multitude of thy mercies I approach unto thee. O Lord, desiring he to look down from the height of thy sanctuary upon me poor, and wretched sinner, and to wipe away all mine offences, and to blot out all my misdeeds; especially these my ungracious, unclean, and ungodly sins, which I have confessed unto thee, O Lord; oh let them not come up in remembrance before thee, nor be imputed to me for ever, for thy son's sake O Lord, in whom thou art well pleased, in whom thou wast fully satisfied upon the Cross for my sins: grant me free pardon and remission of that I have so foolishly by my exceeding frailty committed against thy divine Majesty: and work in my heart an utter detestation of all my sins, that I may ever hereafter keep myself pure and unspotted for thy kingdom. Thou that art able to make of stones children to Abraham, mollify I pray thee my stony heart, that all manner of sonlike affections may be imprinted therein: pluck up, O good Father, these roots of bitterness, that no unsavoury fruit may come off the tree, which then by thy own hand hast planted; I desire, I look, I call, I cry for thy assistance, that I may conquer all my unruly, and disordinate motions, and desires, and affections. O blessed Saviour, that hast granted so many Petitions upon earth, to them that were careful for the body, fulfil, I pray thee, this my desire, not for health, nor strength, nor riches, nor honour, nor for food, nor apparel, but for thy heavenly grace and inspiration: yea let me lose all those rather than be left in my sinful flesh, that I should be ruled any longer thereby. Mortify in me, good Father, the old body of sin, and give unto me a new body, purged from dead works, to serve the living God: renew my spirit daily, that I may cast away the works of darkness: let it be enough, O merciful Father, that my weakness heretofore, hath been made known unto me, lest I should be too proud Now let thy strength appear, in putting this my enemy under my feet, that thereby I may be bold to put my confidence in thee. Why should my body made by thy hand, and my soul framed according to thy Image, be given as a prey into the hands of Satan? Deliver me, O Lord, from the snares of the hunter, and preserve me from the hands of mine enemy, who lieth in wait for my spiritual life, and laboureth my everlasting destruction; so shall I praise thee for thy goodness, and magnify thy Name, for giving me conquest over my adversary that is too strong for me. To thee I ●…ie for succour, till this tempest be overpast; hid me, I pray thee, under thy shield, and buckler, that no●e of the fiery darts of Satan take ho●● of me. Good Lord, for the lov● thou bearest to mankind▪ for thy Son's sake, who hath taken our nature upon him, grant that I may not be tempted above my strength, and that in all temptations I may fly unto thee, giving thee most humble and hearty thanks for that thou hast given a desire to withstand my sinful flesh, which thy work, I beseech thee, for thy Name sake, to perfect and fully accomplish, Amen.   

A Meditation of the glory of the new Jerusalem.  
Unto the spring of endless life,  
My fainting soul doth thirst,  
Full feign the cloister of her flesh  
With speed she wisheth burst.  
She seeks, she sues, she strives exiled,  
Her Country to obtain,  
Wailing that nothing here she finds  
But misery and pain.  
Contemplating the glory, which  
She when she sinned lost,  
Her woes increase her grief the more  
To think how dear they cost.  
For who can utter with what joy  
That happy peace delights?  
Where Palaces stand stately reared  
With living Margarites;  
With gold the lofty turrets shine,  
And chambers glittering bright,  
And all the frame, with only gems  
And precious stones is dight,  
The streets, the City out are paved  
With gold as crystal clean,  
Where dirt, nor rays, nor dung annoys,  
Nor any filth is seen.  
Stormy winter, scorching summer,  
Come never there to brawl,  
Rose flowers spring continually  
With spring continual:  
Lilies still white and saffron ruddy  
And balsam sweeting grows;  
Meads always green, corn always grown  
And honey in rivers flows,  
Sweet spices breath out fragrant smells,  
Rich liquors and perfumes,  
Fair orchards overshaded stand  
With fruit that near consumes,  
No varying course of sun, or moon,  
Or stars, comes in their sight;  
The Lamb is to that happy City  
A never failing light.  
Nor night, nor morn, nor time is there,  
But a continual day,  
Where Saints in glory shine like suns  
And glittering beams display;  
In triumphs crowned, together they  
With joy conjubilate,  
And the battles of their vanquished foe  
Secured, now relate.  
Purged clean from either blot or spot  
They grudge of flesh seel none;  
For flesh made now spiritual,  
With the spirit grease in one,  
Abounding with untroubled peace,  
No scandals them annoy,  
Who freed from mutabilty,  
Their centre re-enjoy;  
Where now they present see that truth  
Which mortal eyes near saw,  
And from the everlasting spring  
A living sweetness draw.  
Where ere they go they still retain  
The same unaltred state,  
Fair, lively, cheerful, subject to  
No change, of chance, or fate.  
Whose health, no sickness doth decay,  
Whose youth no age doth waste,  
Whose being without passing is,  
For passing now is past.  
They spring, they bloom, they flourish still  
From all corruption free,  
Mortality is swallowed up  
By Immortality.  
Who knowing him, who all doth know,  
Can ignorant not be,  
Who in each others patent breasts,  
All inmost secrets see.  
The same they will, the same they nill,  
One mind the same of all,  
Though according to their several pains  
Their guerdons several.  
Thus what's another's, Charity  
By love so makes her own,  
That what is proper to every one,  
To all is common grown.  
Where ere the bodies, the Eagles there  
Are duly congregated,  
And with it are those blessed souls  
And Angels recreated.  
One bread both Country, Citizens,  
Doth feed; one bread they crave,  
Still hungry, and yet always full,  
Still wishing what they have.  
Whom no satiety doth cloy,  
Whom hunger doth not by't,  
With appetite they ever eat,  
And still have appetite.  
There the melodious singing voice,  
New harmonies concents,  
Their ears are lulled with sweetest sounds  
Of rarest Instruments,  
To him by whom they conquered have  
Due praises there they sing.  
O happy soul! who present dost  
Behold so great a King,  
And from thy lofty throne surviewst  
The underwheeling Globes:  
The sun, the moon, & all the heavens  
In star bespangled robes.  
O Christ, the palm of warriors,  
Vouchsafe me of thy pity,  
To make me when I end my war,  
A freeman of this City.  
Grant me among these Citizens  
Thy bounties to partake,  
Mean while assist me with thy aid,  
A happy fight to make:  
That warring out my time, the rest  
In quiet I may spend,  
And for my guerdon thee enjoy,  
For ever without end.  
Amen.    

A serious discourse concerning the Day of Death.  
LET us imagine how the time being now come, in which the sinful soul is to be separated from the bands of the body with how grievous fear it is terrified! with how great anguish of an afflicted conscience it is tormented! it remembers the things forbidden, which it hath committed; it beholdeth the Commandments of God, which through negligence and contempt it hath omitted: it grieveth that the time which it had to repent hath been so vainly employed: it grieveth the imutable moment of severe revenge is so near at hand, not possible to be avoided: it would fain stay, it is forced to departed; it would feign recover that which it hath lost, and cannot be heard; it looketh backward upon the course of its whole life past, and esteemeth it to be but as it were one only little pace; it looketh forward and seethe infinite worlds of time, which shall never have end: It lamenteth therefore, for having lost the joys of all eternity which it might have gained so quickly; it weepeth likewise, that for the short pleasure of the alluring flesh, it is bereft of everlasting happiness; it blusheth that for the substance sake, which is to be meat for worms, it hath neglected that which should have been placed amongst the quires of Angels.  
At length it lifteth up the eyes of its mind, and considering the glory of the immortal riches of Heaven, it is ashamed, that for the love of the beggary of this present life, it hath lost that glory: again, when it looketh downwards upon the veil of this world, as upon a mist, and contrariwise, seeing above it the brightness of that eternal light, it plainly perceiveth that that which was loved, was but darkness, and night. Oh if it could obtain the favour to have some little time for repentance! how austere would it be in life and conversation? how many, and how great matters would it promise to perform? how strictly would it bind itself to piety, and devotion? in the mean season, whilst the eyesight faileth, and whilst the heart panteth, and the throat doth draw breath with difficulty, whilst the countenance groweth pale, and all the members of the body become stiff through cold; whilst these things, and other such like, happen, as certain signs of death approaching, all its works and words present themselves before it, yea, it's very thoughts are not wanting; and all these give bitter testimony against it, as against the Author of them: All its sins and iniquities are laid as it were in heaps before its eyes, and those which it is unwilling to see, it is forced to behold, whether it will or no.  
Moreover, on the one side of it, it beholdeth a terrible troop of dreadful Devils, on the other side a multitude of heavenly Angels; the soul that lieth in the midst, quickly perceiveth to which of these companies it appertaineth, for if there be seen in it the signs and tokens of goodness, it is comforted by the comfortable speeches of the Angels, and by the sweetness of their harmonious melody, it is alured to come forth of the body: contrariwise, if the darkness of its deserts, and deformity of its filthiness do adjudge it to the left hand, it is forthwith strucken with intolerable fear; it is troubled through the force of the sudden violence that is used; it is thrown down headlong, and assaulted, and (poor soul) is forcibly plucked out of the prison of the flesh, that it may be drawn to eternal torments with unspeakable bitterness.  
Now after it is departed out of the body, who is able to express how many troops of wicked spirits do lie in wait to entrap it? how many bands of frowning fiends being ready with cruel torments to afflict it do beset the way to hinder his passage? and to the end it may not escape and pass through them whole legions of them do assault the same.  
Wherefore, to consider these▪ and such like things, by frequent meditation, is a sovereign means to contemn the enticing allurements of sin, to abandon the world, and to subdue the unlawful motions of the flesh; and finally doth cause, and conserve in us a continual desire of attaining to perfection, which God of his mercy grant us, Amen.  
ALmighty God, and all merciful Father, which art the Physician of my body and soul, in thy hands are life and death; thou bringest to the grave and pullest bacl again: I came into the world upon condition to forsake it whensoever thou wouldst call me; and now the Summoners are come, thy fetters hold me, and none can lose me but he that bond me: I am sick in body and in soul, but he hath strucken me, which in judgement showeth mercy; I deserved to die so soon as I came to life, but thou hast preserved me till now; and shall this mercy be in vain, as though I were preserved for nothing? who can praise thee in the grave? I have done thee no service since I was borne, but my goodness is to come; and shall I die before I begin to live? but, Lord, thou knowest what is best of all, and if thou convert me I shall be converted in an instant; and as thou acceptedst the will of David as well as the act of Solomon, so thou wilt accept my desire to serve thee, as well as if I had lived to glorify thee: the spirit is willing, but the flesh is frail, and as I did live sinfully whensoever thy spirit was from me, so I shall die unwillingly, unless thy spirit prepare me; therefore, dear Father, give me that mind which a sick man should have, and increase my patience with my pain, and call unto my remembrance all which I have heard, or read, or felt, or meditated, to strengthen me in this hour of my trial that I which never taught any good while I lived, may now teach others how to die, & to bear their sickness patiently: apply unto me all the mercies and merits of thy beloved Son, as if he had died for me alone: be not far from me when the enemy comes, but when the tempter is busiest, let thy spirit be busy too, and if it please thee to lose me out of this prison, when I shall leave my earth to earth, let thy Angels carry up my soul to Heaven, as they did Lazarus▪ and place me in one of those Mansions which thy Son is gone to prepare for me; this is my Mediator which hath reconciled me unto thee; when thou didst abhor me for my sins, thou didst send him from heaven to me, to show that thou art ready to hear him for us, therefore in him I come unto thee, in him I will call upon thee, O my Redeemer, Preserver, and my Saviour, to thee be praise with the Father, and the Holy Spirit for ever. Amen.  
Who shall stay me from my Father, and my Brother, and my Comforter.  
I Own God a death, as his Son died for me: ever since I was borne I have been sailing towards this Haven, and gathering patience to comfort this hour, therefore shall I be one of those guests now that would not come to the banquet when they were invited? what hurt is in going to Paradise? I shall lose nothing but the sense of evil, and anon I shall have greater joys than I feel pains; for my head is in Heaven already, to assure me that my soul and body shall follow after: O Death where is thy sting? why should I fear that which I would not escape, because my chiefest happiness is behind, and I cannot have it unless I go unto it; I would go through Hell to Heaven; and therefore if I march but through death, I suffer less than I would for God: my pains do not dismay me, because I travel to bring forth eternal life; my sins do not affright me, because I have Christ my Redeemer; the Judge doth not astonish me, because the Judge's Son is my Advocate; the Devil doth not amaze me, because the Angel's pitch about me; the grave doth not grieve me, because it was my Lord's bed. O that God's mercies to me, might move others to love him; for the less I can express it, the more it is: the Prophets and Apostles are my forerunners, every man is gone before me, or else he will follow after me▪ if it please God to receive me into Heaven before them that have served him better, I own more thanks to him: and because I have deferred my repentance till this hour, whereby my salvation is cut off if I should die suddenly: lo, how my God in his merciful providence, to prevent my destruction, calleth me by a lingering sickness, which stayeth till I be ready, and prepareth me to my end like a Preacher, and makes me by woeful pains, weary of this beloved world, lest I should departed unwillingly, like them whose death is their damnation: so he loveth me whilst he beateth me, that his stripes are Plasters to salve me: therefore who shall love him, if I forsake him? this is my whole desire now to strengthen my body with my heart, and to be contented, as God hath apppointed, until I glorify him, or he glorify me; If I live, I live to sacrifice; if I die, I die a sacrifice, for his mercy is above my iniquity: therefore if I should fear death, it were a sign that I had not faith, nor hope, as I professed but that I doubted of God's truth in his promise, whether he will forgive his penitent sinners or no. It is my Father, let him do what seemeth good in his sight. Come Lord Jesus, for thy servant cometh; I am willing, help my unwillingnesses.   

For the Morning.  

NOw that the day star doth arise  
Beg we of God with humble cries  
Hurtful things to keep away,  
While we duly spend the day,  
Our tongues to guide, so that no strife  
May breed disquiet in our life:  
To shut and close the wand'ring eye,  
Lest it let in vanity:  
To keep the heart as pure and free  
From ●●nd and troubled fantasy:  
To tame proud flesh, while we deny it  
A full cup and wanton diet,  
That when the day light shall go out  
Time bringing on the night about,  
We by leaving worldly ways,  
May in silence sing God praise.  
Amen.   

Come Holy Ghost, our souls inspire,  
And lighten with celestial fire;  
Thou the anointing spirit art  
Who dost thy sevenfold gifts impart;  
Thy blessed unction from above,  
Is comfort, life, and fire of love;  
〈…〉 with perpetual light  
The …nesse of my blinded sight.  
Anoint and cheer my soiled face  
With the abundance of thy grace:  
Keep 〈◊〉 my ●oes, give peace at hom  
Where thou art guide, no ill can come.  
Teach me to know the father, son,  
And thee of both to be but one.  
That through the Ages all along,  
This may be my endless song,  
Praise to thy Eternal Merit,  
Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.   

A Prayer for the Morning.  
O Lord be merciful unto me a miserable sinner.  
O Lord I beseech thee, let thine ears be attentive unto the prayer of thy servant that desires to fear thy name, and prosper I pray thee, thy servant this day.  
And good Lord I beseech thee, send thy holy Spirit into my soul, so to teach me to pray unto thee, that both myself, and my prayers, may be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord my strength, and my Redeemer. And good Lord I beseech thee, to remove all my sins out of thy sight, that they may neither hinder my prayers from ascending up unto thee, nor thy mercies from descending down upon me: And good Lord, I humbly beseech thee, to banish out of my heart and soul all evil thoughts and desires, all fond love and affection, all carnal lust and concupiscence, and whatsoever else may any way hinder me from the true love, and worship of thy divine and sacred Majesty.   

O Eternal God, maker and high possessor both of Heaven and Earth, look down, I humbly beseech thee, with pity and compassion upon a poor, miserable, distressed sinner, who am not worthy to lift up my eyes towards the throne of thy divine and sacred Majesty much less worthy of any of thy mercies, and gracious blessings, which continually from time to time thou hast been pleased to bestow upon me▪ for, O Lord, so many and so mighty are my sins, wherewith I have offended thy divine and sacred Majesty, both in thought, word, deed, and desire, that if thou shouldst enter into judgement with me, and deal with me according to thy justice, and my desert, I must expect nothing but eternal death and damnation: But I most humbly beseech thee for Jesus Christ his sake, that it will please thee to have mercy upon me, and to pardon me all my sins and offences, and to remove all those judgements away from me, which my sins have deserved: and give me grace ever hereafter to amend my ungodly life, and to love, and serve, and honour thee, truly, faithfully, and unfeignedly, without pride, presumption, vain glory, and hypocrisy; from these and all other deadly sins, good Lord deliver me. And good Father, I give thee most humble thanks for all thy mercies and gracious blessings which continually from time to time thou hast been pleased to bestow upon me, more especially for that it hath pleased thee this night past to preserve me from all evils, notwithstanding all my sins, and ill deserts; Lord thou mightest have made my bed my grave, and thrown my soul into the deep pit of hell, hadst thou dealt with me according to thy justice, and my desert, but good Father, as thou hast given me time, so I beseech thee, for Jesus Christ his sake, to give me grace to repent and amend my ungodly life, and to spend those remnant of days which thou hast appointed me to live, only in thy service. And to that end, O Lord I humbly beseech thee, withdraw my heart and soul from the love of the world and worldly vanities, and wholly devote it unto the love and service of thy divine Majesty. And good Father, I humbly beseech thee, for Jesus Christ his sake, that it will please thee to continue thy loving favour unto me, in preserving me this day from all sin and wickedness, from all evil thoughts, words, deeds, and desires, and from all evil and misfortune, both of soul and body: good Lord, sanctify my soul and body this day and evermore to thy service; Lord bless and prosper all my proceed, all my thoughts, words, deeds, and desires, and grant that they may all be directed to the honour and glory of thy Name, the good of others, and the peace and comfort of my own soul and conscience, when I shall come before thee to make my last accounts▪ Lord keep me in thy faith, fear, and love; and give me grace to live in thy fear, and die in thy favour; and good Lord, I humbly beseech thee to grant me the use of my sight, senses, and limbs, whilst I live in this transitory life, that I may be the better enabled to serve thee: Lord be merciful to thy whole Church and chosen people every where, and in thy good time establish thy true Religion and Worship amongst us, which is agreeable to thy holy will and word. And now good Lord, Into thy hands I humbly commend my soul and body my life and all that ever I have, to be guided directed and protected by thee: good Lord, suffer me not this day to do any thing to displease thee, but let thy holy spirit guide and direct me, thy holy Angels pitch their tents round about me, to keep and protect me from all the assaults of my enemies both bodily and ghostly this day and ever: Good Lord, show me the way wherein I shall walk, and the thing that I shall do; and give me grace to walk humbly, faithfully, and sincerely before thee this day and all the days of my life; grant this, O most merciful Father, and whatsoever else thou in thy divine wisdom knowest most needful for me, and that for the merits of thy dear son, my Saviour Jesus Christ; to whom with the Father, and the holy and blessed Spirit, be ascribed all honour, praise, power, and glory, world without end, Amen.   
O Lord pardon the imperfection of my Prayers.  
Dum expiro spero.   

For the Evening.  


BLessed Saviour, Lord of all,  
Vouchsafe to hear when we call:  
And now to those propitious be,  
That in prayer bow to thee,  
Still to be kept from misery.   

Great ruler of the day and night,  
On our darkness cast thy light,  
And let thy passion pardon win  
For what we have offended in  
Thought, or word, or deed of sin.   

And as thy mercy wipes away  
What we have done amiss to day,  
So now the night returns again  
Our bodies, and our souls restrain  
From being soiled with sinful stain.   

Let not dull sleep oppress our eyes,  
Nor us the enemy surprise,  
Nor fearful dreams our minds affright  
While the blackness of the night  
Holds from us the cheerful light.   

To thee who dost by rest renew  
Our wasted strength, we humbly sue  
That when we shall unclose our eyes,  
Pure and chaste we may arise,  
And make our morning sacrifice.   

Honour Lord to thee be done,  
O thou blessed Virgin's Son,  
With the Father, and the Spirit,  
As is thine eternal merit,  
Ever and ever to inherit.   
Amen   

An Evening Prayer for a private Family.  
O Eternal and most glorious Lord God, Creator and Maker of Heaven and Earth, we the most miserable, most sinful, and most unworthy of all thy creatures, do here presume to present ourselves before the Throne of thy most glorious Majesty, from the bottom of our hearts humbly acknowledging our vile wickedness, and upon our knees beg pardon of thy gracious and most glorious Majesty, for all our sins past, committed in thought, word, or deed, against thy divine Majesty: And as in duty we are bound, we give thee glory and praise for all thy mercies, and good blessings from time to time bestowed upon us: and more especially and in particular, we laud and magnify thy great and most glorious Name, for that thou hast preserved us safe this day passed from all evils, and from all dangers, both of body and soul, and hast bestowed thy blessings upon us both spiritual and temporal: for which, as for all the rest of thy good gifts and benefits, which either this day past, or at any other time, thou hast been graciously pleased to bestow upon us, we magnify thy great and glorious Name; beseeching thee, that with thy blessings thou wilt give us thy Grace, that we may live to glorify thy great and most mighty Name for them all. And good Lord, we beseech thee, pass by our great, manifold, and most numberless sins and transgressions: Lord grant us true repentance for them all; and grant us grace ever hereafter, to serve and please thee in newness of life, all the the days we have to live in this our Pilgrimage. Lord teach us so to number our days that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom, and grant us grace, good Father, that we may so spend our remainder of days that we have to live in this world, that they may be to the glory of thy great Name, and to the salvation of our own souls, for Jesus Christ's sake. And as thou hast been a mighty and most glorious Lord God, in preserving and keeping of us, all the days and times of our life hitherto, and especially this day past, so good Lord, vouchsafe to take us all this night into thy most glorious protection: Lord, defend and keep us from all evils, and from all dangers, that may happen unto us either bodily or ghostly Lord, let thy holy Angels guard us to deliver us from all evils. Lord bless us all with the quiet rest and sleep of our bodies: Save us, good Lord, waking, and keep us sleeping, that we may wake in Christ and rest in peace. Bless us, that both sleeping and waking we may be thine. O Lord, leave us not to ourselves, nor forsake us utterly, but in thy blessed time, make us to be sheep of that flock whereof our blessed Lord and Saviour Christ Jesus is the great Shepherd. Hear us, good Lord, in these our weak & most imperfect prayers; grant us them, and what else thou in thy mighty wisdom knowest to be most necessary for us, and that for the glory of thy great Names sake, for thy mercy sake, and for our blessed Lord and Saviour Christ Jesus sake; in whose most blessed name and words we further call upon thee, as he in his holy, and Heavenly, and most blessed Gospel hath taught us saying:  
Our Father, etc.  
Let thy mighty hand and outstretched arm, O Lord, be still our defence; thy mercy and loving kindness in Jesus Christ thy dear son, our salvation; thy true and holy word, our instruction; thy grace and holy spirit, our comfort and consolation, unto the end, and in the end. Amen.   

When we enter into our bed.  
IN the Name of our Lord Jesus Christ, (who was crucified upon his Cross, and laid into his grave for me) I lay me down to rest: he bless me, keep me, and raise me up again, and bring me at last to life eternal. Amen.  
I will lay me down in peace, and take my rest, for it is thou Lord only, that makest me dwell in safety.  
Have mercy upon me, O Lord, now and at the hour of death.  
Preserve me while I am waking, and defend me when I am sleeping, that my soul may continually watch for thee, and both body and soul may rest in thy peace for evermore, Amen.   

An admonition before we go to sleep.  

PErmit not sluggish sleep  
To close your waking eye,  
Till that with judgement deep  
Your daily deeds you try.  
He that his sin in conscience keeps  
When he to quiet goes,  
More desperate is then he that sleeps  
Amidst his mortal foes.   

At night lie down  
Prepare to have  
Thy sleep, thy death,  
Thy bed, thy grave.  
Awake, arise,  
Think that thou hast  
Thy life but lent,  
Thy breath a blast.  
O thou God Almighty!  
Father of all mercy,  
Fountain of all pity,  
Grant I beseech thee,  
Of thy great clemency,  
On me to have mercy,  
Now, and at the hour of death,   
Amen.    


Proverbs of Solomon,  

Chap. 10.  
Treasure's of wickedness profit nothing: but righteousness delivereth from death.  
The Lord will not suffer the soul of the righteous to famish: but he casteth away the substance of the wicked.  
Blessings are upon the head of the Just: but violence covereth the mouth of the wicked.  
The memory of the just is blessed: but the name of the wicked shall rot.  
The blessings of the Lord it maketh rich, and he doth add no sorrows with it.  
The fear of the Lord increaseth the days: but the years of the wicked shall be diminished.  
The patiented abiding of the righteous shallbe gladness: but the hope of the wicked shall perish.  
The righteous shall never be removed: but the wicked shall not dwell in the Land.   

Chap. 11.  
RIches avail not in the day of wrath: but righteousness delivereth from death.  
The righteousness of the just shall deliver them: but the transgressors shallbe taken in their own net.  
He that is merciful rewardeth his own soul.  
As righteousness leadeth to life: so he that followeth evil, seeketh his own death.  
They that are of a froward heart, are abomination to the Lord: but they that are upright in the way, are his delight.  
He that trusteth in riches shall fall: but the righteous shall flourish as a leaf.   

Chap. 13.  
THe hope that is deferred, is the fainting of the heart: but when the desire cometh, it is a tree of life.  
He that despiseth the word, he shallbe destroyed: but he that feareth the Commandments, he shallbe rewarded.   

Chap. 14.  
IN the fear of the Lord is an assured strength, and his Children shall have hope.  
The fear of the Lord is a Wellspring of life, to avoid the snares of death.   

Chap. 15.  
THe Lord is far from the wicked: but he heareth the prayer of the righteous.  
The fear of the Lord is the instruction of wisdom: and before honour goeth humility.   

Chap. 16.  
COmmit thy works unto the Lord, and thy thoughts shallbe directed.  
By mercy, and truth iniquity shall be forgiven: and by the fear of the Lord they departed from evil.  
Age is a crown of glory, when it is found in the way of righteousness.  
He that is slow to anger, is better than the mighty man: and he that ruleth his own mind is better than he that winneth a City.   

Chap. 17.  
A Joyful heart causeth good health: but a sorrowful mind drieth the bones.   

Chap. 18.  
THe name of the Lord is a strong tower: the righteous runneth to it and is exalted.  
The spirit of man will sustain his infirmity: but a wounded spirit who can bear?   

Chap. 19  
HE that hath mercy upon the poor, dareth unto the Lord, and the Lord will recompense him that which he hath given.  
The fear of the Lord leadeth to life; and he that is filled therewith, shall continue, and shall not be visited with evil.   

Chap. 21.  
HE that followeth after righteousness and mercy, shall find life, righteousness and glory.   

Chap. 22.  
THe reward of humility, and the fear of God, is riches, glory, and life.  
My son, give me thy heart, and let thine eyes delight in my ways.   

Chap. 28.  
HE that hideth his sins shall not prosper: but he that confesseth and forsaketh them, shall have mercy.  
Blessed is the man that feareth always: but he that hardeneth his heart, shall fall into evil.  
He that walketh uprightly shall be saved: but he that is froward in his wages, shall fall at once.    

Job. Chap. 28.  
THe fear of the Lord is wisdom, and to departed from evil is understanding.   

Ecclesiastes. Chap. 7.  
A Good Name is better than a good Ointment, and the day of death than the day that one is born.  
It is better to go to the house of mourning, then to the house of feasting, because this is the end of all men: and the living shall lay it to heart. Anger is better than laughter; for by a sad look the heart is made better.  
The heart of the wise is in the house of mourning: but the heart of fools is in the house of mirth.  
The end of a thing is better than the beginning thereof: and the patiented in spirit is better than the proud in spirit.  
In the day of wealth be of good Comfort; and in the day of affliction consider.  
Surely there is no man just upon the earth, that doth good and sinneth not.   

Ecclesiasticus.  

Chap. 1.  
THe fear of the Lord is glory, and gladness, and rejoicing, and a joyful Crown.  
The fear of the Lord maketh a merry heart, and giveth gladness, and joy, and long life.  
Who so feareth the Lord, it shall go well with him at the last, and he shall find favour in the day of his death.  
Who so feareth the Lord shall prosper, and in the day of his end he shall be blessed.  
A patiented man will suffer for a time, and then he shall have the reward of joy.   

Chap. 2.  
YE that fear the Lord, love him, and your hearts shallbe lightened.  
Consider the old generations of men, ye children, and mark them them well: was there ever any confounded that put his trust in the Lord? or who hath continued in his fear, and was forsaken? or whom did he ever despise that called upon him?  
For God is gracious and merciful, and forgiveth sins, and saveth in the time of trouble, and is a defender for all them that seek him in truth.   

Chap. 6.  
HOld friendship with many, nevertheless have but one Councillor of a thousand.  
Depart from thy enemies, and be wary of thy friends.   

Chap. 7.  
LEt not them that weep be without comfort: By'r mourn with such as mourn.  
Whatsoever thou takest in hand remember the end, and thou shalt never do amiss.   

Chap. 8.  
DEspise not a man that turneth himself away from sin, nor cast him not in the teeth withal, but remember that we are all worthy of blame.   

Chap. 9  
TRy thy neighbour as near as thou canst; and ask Counsel of the wise.  
Let thy talk be with the wise, and all thy communication in the Law of the most high.  
Let just men eat and drink with thee, and let thy rejoicing be in the fear of the Lord.   

Chap. 10.  
GOd destroyeth the memorial of the proud, and leaveth the remembrance of the humble.  
Pride was not created in men, neither wrath in the generation of women.  
The fear of the Lord is the glory as well of the rich, and the noble, as of the poor.  
It is not meet to despise the poor man that hath understanding: neither is it convenient to magnify the rich that is a wicked man.  
The great man, and the Judge, and the man in authority, are honourable; yet is there none greater than he that feareth the Lord.   

Chap. 11.  
Wisdom setteth up the head of him that is low, and maketh him to sit among great men.  
Commend not a man for his beauty: neither despise a man in his outward appearance.  
Be not proud of clothing and raiment, and exalt not thyself in the day of honour; for the works of the Lord are wonderful, and glorious, secret and unknown are his works among men.  
Blame no man before thou hast inquired the matter: understand first, and then reform righteously.  
Give no sentence, before thou hast heard the Cause, neither interrupt men in the midst of their tales.  
Prosperity and adversity, life and death, poverty and riches come of the Lord.  
The gift of the Lord remaineth for the godly, and his good will giveth prosperity for ever.  
In thy good state remember adversity: and in adversity forget not prosperity.  
For it is an easy thing unto the Lord in the day of death to reward a man according to his ways.  
The adversity of an hour maketh one to forget pleasure: and in a man's end his works are discovered.  
Judge no man blessed before his death.   

Chap. 12.  
When thou wilt do good, know to whom thou dost it, so shalt thou be thanked for thy benefits.  
Do good unto the righteous, and thou shalt find great reward, though not of him, yet of the most high.  
Bind not two sins together, for there shall not one be unpunnished.   

Chap. 14.  
BLessed is the man that hath not fall'n by the word of his mouth, and is not tormented with the sorrow of sin.  
Blessed is the man that is not condemned in his conscience, and is not fall'n from his hope in the Lord.  
Do good unto thy friend before thou die, and according to thy ability stretch out thy hand and give him.  
He that feareth the Lord will do good: and he that hath the knowledge of the Law, will keep it sure.   

Chap. 21.  
MY son, hast thou sinned? do so no more, but pray for the former sins, that they may be forgiven thee.  
Fly from sin, as from a serpent, for if thou comest near it, it will by't thee: the teeth thereof are as the teeth of a Lion to slay the souls of men.  
All iniquity is as a two edged sword, the wounds where of cannot be healed.  
The prayer of the poor going out of the mouth, cometh unto the ears of the Lord, and justice is done unto him incontinently.  
Whoso hateth to be reform, is in the way of sinners: but he that feareth the Lord converteth in heart.   

Chap. 23.  
ACcustom not thy mouth to swearing, for in it there are many falls; neither take up for a custom the naming of the Holy one, for thou shalt not be unpunished for such things.  
A man that useth much swearing, shall be filled with wickedness, and the plague shall never go from his house▪ when he shall offend, his fault shallbe upon him; and if he acknowledge not his sin, he maketh a double offence: and if he swear in vain, he shall not be innocent, but his house shall be full of plagues.  
Who shall set a watch before my mouth, and a seal of wisdom upon my lips, that I fall not suddenly, and that my tongue destroy me not?  
O Lord, Father and Governor of my whole life, leave me not to the Counsel of the wicked, and let me not fall by them.  
Who will correct my thought, and put the doctrine of wisdom in mine heart, lest my ignorances' increase, and my sins abound to my destruction, and lest I fall before my adversaries, and my enemies rejoice over me, whose hope is far from thy mercy.  
O Lord, Father, and God of my life, leave me not in their imaginations, neither give me a proud look, but turn away from thy servant a haughty mind.  
Take from me vain hope and concupiscence, and retain him in obedience that desireth continually to serve thee.  
Let not the greediness of the belly, nor lust of the flesh hold me, and give not me thy servant over into an impudent mind.     
FINIS.