To my Worthy Friends, Mr. W.C. and Mr. A.P.  
HAD it not been a necessary Acknowledgement, I had not presumed (Gentlemen) to have occasioned you a Blush, in throwing such a Trifle as this unto your Protection. And yet, I fear, that what I design as an Expression of my Gratitude for your many Favours, may draw on me a greater Obligation from you; I mean in receiving this into your Patronage: It is the first thing I have done public Penance for in a Sheet: Which, yet, had Mr. Blount been less hasty, had been more Correct and Pardonable. You know the Circumstances that provoked me to this Attempt; I shall only put you in mind, that— 
Nil habet Infaelix Paupertas durius in se,  
Quam quod Ridicules homines facit!   
I shall not need to trouble you with the English on't, to whom the Latin is as familiar and easy as your own English Tongue: Nor would I have the Ladies understand it, lest it spoil my Fortunes.  
I must confess there is much in that! But there will be infinitely more in your goodness, if you will not, for this, lessen the kind opinion you have hitherto had of, most Dear Friends!  
Your most sensibly Obliged, Obedient and Humble Servant, A. O.   

THE Fair EXTRAVAGANT OR, THE Humorous Bride. AN ENGLISH NOVEL.  
IT is expected (perhaps) I should say something by way of Introduction to this Discourse, an play the Philosopher before I play the Poet. But at present I am not disposed to be serious; besides I never was fond of that tedious Paradox, the farthest way about, is the nearest way home, and so am willing to be Trudging on to the Story, which tells us:  
Ariadne was as Beautiful as any of her Age, as Witty as Fair, as well Educated, and as Humorous as either; Add to these the advantage of her Uncle's Death, who left her sole Heiress to Twelve Hundred Pounds a Year, besides some Thousands in Money and Jewels, and you will conclude he was the happiest younger Brother in Christendom that Married her: And so (perhaps) he was; for I never heard her Virtue called in question; and 'tis hard if a Man could miscarry among so many Excellencies; at least it must be his own fault. Her Birth two was Honourable enough, being Daughter to a Knight Baronet, by which you may guests she was an English Woman and our Neighbour; for (by the way) I am not going to put any Spanish Intrigue upon you.  
The last fatal time she was in Town, being about the seventeenth year of her Reign, (for Beauty, give me leave to tell you, has a large Empire) she Lodged,— let me see! somewhere about St. James'. I need not describe her Lodgings to you, I must only say, they were agreeable to her Humour and Fortune, which made 'em both splendid and pleasant, being richly hung and adorned with Cabinets, China, Glasses and what not! But much more with excellent Pictures of the best Hands, and those chiefly in her Closet, where (if ever you were there) you might have observed that of Don Quixot, and Sancho Panca, which hung just over against Amadis de Gaul, and directly opposite to Oroondates and Caesario in Combat when they had mistaken one another; with many more fantastics. Nor were her Books better matched. Here you might see Frances Quarles bound up with George Withers, Sir John Suckling and Sir John Denham, Randolph and Broom, Shakespeare and Johnson (though they could hardly ever agree before) B●●●●●● and Fl●cher (you know) always wor● together; many other Modern Poets were piled in a heap; my Lord Rochester was laid aside, only Mr. Cowley stood alone: but what was most pleasant of all, this satirical pretty Lady had bound Rabelais with Dod upon Clever. In short, here lay a Play, there a Sermon; here an Academy, there a Prayer-Book; here a Romance, and there a Bible: not but that she was a good Christian for all this I dare say. Now be pleased to take notice, when she was weary of singing and dancing, she did often read in one or other of these Books, especially Romances, for she was a great lover of Knight Errantry, and was a little 〈◊〉 way addicted, as I fear you'll find, she had had the tender of many Hearts, the proffers of many a fair Service, but either this was a Squire, or that a Clown, or t'other a Fop, and so to the end of the Chapter: she never yet had liked any so well as to M●●●y, One day, being very long and 〈◊〉 at her Devotion, I mean, her 〈◊〉 on a sudden she starts up and run● 〈◊〉 a Cousin of hers, whom she l●●ed ●●ry dearly. My heart (said she) I am resolved on't, my own Miranda (she continued) it must be. I am confirmed in the reasonableness of the project, and I will go through with it; therefore make haste and prepare to second me.— The young Lady her Cousin was surprised, but knowing her humour pretty well, she strait concluded there was some frolic intended, and boldly said, Led on (my Dear●) I'll follow thee, assured that still thy Virtue will guide us always. Perhaps (replied Ariadne) the zealous and the scrupulous may at this time call it in question, but thou shalt be my Judge. Know then (thou tenderest part of my Soul!) I am just now weary of that o'repressing weight of a Maidenhead, which I have laboured under these five long years; and since I have not been Courted by any man to whom I could engage myself for ever and for Ay, I am resolved we will put on two of my Brother's 〈◊〉 and ramble all the Town over, 〈◊〉 will meet with the man with whom I can find in my heart to commit the dangerous Sin of Matrimony. Thou wilt be witness of all my actions, which I hope shall ●●●er cost thee a Blush, Ah (dearest friend) replied Miranda, I know your Virtue keeps too strict a Guard, to permit any thing to be acted contrary to its Prerogative, 'tis absolute and allows but few privileges to the Subject, but those most wholesome and pleasant; and for this little extravagance you have proposed, I think it so Innocent, especially regarding the design that leads you, that I protest I am fond of it myself. Come along then (said Ariadne) let's to my Brother's Chamber and dress! 'tis now about three a Clock, and Evander (that was her Brother's name) is just gone out to take a Bottle before Playtime: How know you t●●t? (said her Cousin,) As I sat in my Closet (replied Ariadne) I heard him ask if the Coach were ready? 'twas answered yes, upon which he went down stairs. This blessed opportunity must not escape us, by 〈◊〉 means (said her loving Second.) Without making any more words therefore they went directly to Evanders' Wardrobe, 〈◊〉 fitted themselves with two of the richest, and most modish Suits that were there, which indeed were very Glorious and fashionable: for by the way, Evander was a Spark of the first Rate, his Father having left above 3000 l. a year, clear Estate in Land, besides a considerable bank of Money. He was very good humoured and very handsome, much like his Sister, and very little Taller; four years older than she, being just turned of twenty one. However were he twenty Brothers, and twenty times more like her, than he was, she was mighty glad of his Absence, for they immediately dressed themselves, and the  sat very well on 'em, being all three much of the same height and proportion. Now (said Miranda) Cousin, Marry assoon as you will, I would advise you not to part with the Breeche●, for I vow to you they become you extremely well! Pardon me Miranda (said our t'other Amazon) if I take not your advice, for I should perfectly hate my Husband, if I perceived he would suffer me to impose on him. But come Child (continued she) let's see if the Coast be Clear, and whip out the back way: saying so, down the Back-stairs they went into the Garden, which Door they presently unlocked, Ariadne constantly keeping a Key of it about her, afterwards they rambled as far as Fleetstreet, and the crowd going in, and coming out, at Richard's Coffee-house, stopped 'em, which made Ariadne curious to know the humours of such a Place, with much ado than they thrust in boldly and sat 'em down: says one, who sat at the Table where they were, In my opinion the Character of a Popish Successor, etc. is as Rational a Discourse as has been writ of late, nor can I think that Mr. L' Strange has any way answered his least Objections to the D's Succession. O (cried Ariadne) a delicate piece 'tis, no doubt! And if he had but applied himself never so little to the Lord Mayor, and Court of Aldermen, immediately upon the Death of Mr. Jordan; in reward he had certainly obtained the Honour of being Poet to the Honourable City of London, before any the most presumptuous Competitor in Town. 'Twas a strange oversight in him (replied Mira●da) but I understand now he sets up for something more Advantageous; I mean, to be Cheif-Firework Maker to the forementioned Honourable City, upon their usual Solemnities on the 5th. and 18th. of November: and it is said he designs to Burn his own Pope Joan next Year. Why, Sir! (said another that sat by) do you imagine it deserves so ill a fate? And that Mr. S. Writes so mean a Style, that it may only become a Pageant. No pardon me, Sir, (replied Ariadne taking up the Cudgels for her friend) we here no ill opinion of your Author, for certainly I like his Scenes of Love and Gallantry very well: but my friend Elkanah had been more highly to be commended, had he left off before he came to Pope Joan and the Character etc. I suppose (said another neat spruce Spark in a Band) you are a Tory. A Tory! Sir, (cried Ariadne) what's that? That is, a Tantivy-man, a Dukes-man, or a Papist in Masquerade. On my word (said Miranda) 'tis of a large signification! But I can assure you Sir, we are none of all these. Perhaps (continued she) we wish the D. all the Right imaginable: so do I too, (replied our Spark with the Band) but than I fear it will go very hard with him. Pray Sir, (continued he very pertly) done't you think the late Parliament dissolved at Oxford, were all wise and honest, well meaning Gentlemen? How Sir! (cried Ariadne very briskly) All w●●… and honest! that can't be, for 〈◊〉 must be some Fools, and some Knaves, or else they are not the true Representatives of the People. At this, some laughed, and some looked Unpleasantly. On my word young Gentlemen (said Sir Formal with his Band) 'tis well our Precedent is not here, for he would have had about with you before now. About with us? (replied Ariadne) what before all this Reverend Company? No, no, let him take about with his Boys, for we are not for his Management. However, (continued she) 'tis time for us to be gone, for fear he should ha' seen us at Paris or Validolid, or somewhere abroad where neither of us have been these forty Years. With these words they moved their Hats as they had seen others do, and left the Company to censure 'em; they tripped on to the Dukes-Play-house, where that day was played the Orphan, or the Vnhappy-Marriage.  
By the way (said Ariadne) I am sure none of those Fellows we left are for my turn. They got into the Pit, before they were ware, and Ariadne had forgotten the Name of the Play. Prithee Jack (says she to Miranda) what's played to day? The— something, or the Vnhappy-Marriage, (answered she.) How! (said t'other in a surprise) pray Heaven it prove not Ominous! Which is enough to convince any charitable Man that she was a good Christian, for I dare assure him, her Prayers were heard.— Well— But— As she was thus piously reflecting, a Gentleman who sat near 'em, and whom she had not as yet observed, over heard her Deprecations, and taking notice of the Zeal with which she uttered 'em. Sir, (said he) you mistake, possibly; this is not St. Paul's Covent-Garden, nor St. Dunstan's Church; and indeed I believe it is not so proper a place to Pray in. How (said she smartly) I'm sure I have heard many a good Sermon here, and I know no reason but that I may add a Prayer to 'em if I please; for assure yourself I have found it very wholesome so to do. Nay, and more than that, I have on the contrary hummed a Minuet to myself, when I have seen many a Reverend Spark in a Cassook hold forth stoutly, and have nevertheless found no hurt by it at all I am sorry Sir (said he) you have perverted both the Places. Perverted (cried Ariadne, looking earnestly on him) I think I made the prop●●st use of them according to the times and Circumstances, for there I have heard such Hum drum Discourse, that I must of necessity have fallen asleep, had I not sung in my own defence. Now here I have often taken notice of some Scenes that have so patly fitted the Circumstances, which I was then under, that I could not forbear saying Amen to them. (Said Polydore, for so the Gentleman was called,) I see (Sir) you value yourself much on your Contempt of the Clergy and things Sacred, but I can assure you, no man in his right Senses will esteem you e'er the more for it. And pray (Sir) give me leave to ask you how long 'tis since you read Mr. Hobbs' Leviath●●? for, I suppose you are mighty conversant with his Notions. Hum!— (said she scornfully) you will pardon me (Sir) if I do not well know whether you mean a Book or a Monster by the Name. The last undoubtedly (cried Miranda.) You are very positive, Sir (said Polydor,) and have soon determined on my thoughts. But by good fortune you are in the right; for, if things that have no resemblance to the other part of the whole Creation, may justly be called Monstrous; this is so. Ha! (said Ariadne, whispering Miranda) This is the Man. I confess (continued she turning to Polydore) to prevent any further discourse on this matter, I have heard before of this old Gentleman, but I never gave myself the trouble to be better acquainted with him, than by Hear-say. You are the happier man, Sir (said Poloydor) for certainly you have avoided giving yourself a great deal of Perplexity.— By this time the Curtain was drawn up, and they suffered themselves to be entertained by the Players. And truly they did themselves not great Violence, for I think 'twas a good Play. They had however some Discourse between the Acts, which (perhaps) was more Harmonious than the Music, especially to Ariadne, who was so extremely pleased with our younger Brother, (for so was Polydor) that she had engaged to go with him to Lockets after the Play. Now ought I in course, to give you a Character of this same Polydor, and so I will.— He had lived about thirty Years, and those chiefly in Paris and London, and a good Christian too was he. I mean no Papist, nor yet a Presbyterian, but (perhaps) of Mr. Lestrange's Faction, if I may call the Church of England a factious Party; but pardon me, I think it more proper to name those so, who descent from it. For pray take notice I mean to represent him as he was, a very honest brave Gentleman, of a good Family, well educated, and of good natural Parts; for his Singing and Dancing I cannot say much, but of his Poetry, the Town has had sufficient opportunities to Judge. He was as handsome too as the best Here I have ever seen upon our Stage. Not so cruel as Almanzor, nor yet so timorous as Sir Nicholas Culley. Not so vain as Sir Fopling, nor so plain as my worshipful friend Justice Cloapate. In short, he was a very deserving man, you may believe, for I have drunk some Bottles with him. He had an excellent virtue too besides all these, which you will have occasion to observe: I mean his Constancy. This was therefore the Man on whom our fair Amazon had already thrown herself away. To Lockets therefore they went in a Coach together, where my dear friend Polydore lost twenty Guinneys, which both the Masquerading Ladies were witnesses of, but they observed him so undisturbed at it, that they concluded him a Stoic. Said Ariadne to him, Tempt your Fortune (〈◊〉) once more, here are some Guinneys at your service. Pulling out a Purse that held forty or fifty, truly I cannot tell which. I thank you, Sir, (said Polydore, very obligingly,) but I must not accept them. I have lost already what I proposed to myself to hazard, besides I am yet so much a Stranger to you that I ought not in modesty to receive so great an obligation of you, for I have not as yet forgotten that the Philosopher said. Qui beneficium accepit, ●●ent a●om vendidit. Pray what is that (Sir) in English? (said Miranda.) O Sir! (replied Polydor) I am sensible of my want of breeding, and I know it was an Error to speak Latin in gentlemen's Company, especially in such a Place. No matter (said Ariadne) since we know (Sir) you will not accept of my Service. But (proceeded she) I have a proposition to make to you, if you can find in your heart to divorce yourself from this good Company, and drink a Bottle or two with my Cousin and me in another Room. I could wish you would Sir (said Miranda) for I vow to you I am uneasy among so many Strangers. Call then for another Room (said Polydor) and I will wait on you immediately Gentlemen. I will but just take my leave here. They did so, after having made their Congee to our Gamesters, and expected him not long: but no sooner were they gone,  one enquired who they were? Another, whether they would Play? A third, what Estate either of them had? And how long he had known them? Nay god (said he) I have not been long acquainted with them; though one of them is a Relation of mine: which was that? (cried his friend Harry.) Why, he that offered me Money, (answered Polydor.) Damn thee for a Coxcomb, (said his other friend Tom) for refusing it! No no (interrupted our third Gamester) I fancy he has better Business with him hereafter. You may swear it Will (said Polydor) the Gold and I had not parted else, at least this Night; for be pleased to take notice, I should not have played an Ace more. Well— However sit down and drink a little more for the Money thou hast lost already (said honest Will.) No faith (cried Polydor going out) I am engaged. He went directly to his new Acquaintance, who (perhaps) were very glad to see him so punctual: and after having saluted him a fresh, (said Ariadne) Let us now lay aside all formality, for if you please (Sir) I mean to be very intimately acquainted with you. (A pretty sort of a Phrase, had he known who spoke it.) It will undoubtedly be my unhappiness if I be not, (said Polydor.) You do not know (cried she very pleasantly) how it would contribute to the whole felicity of my Life, if you would but endeavour it. How do you mean Sir? (answered Polydor by the way of Question.) I mean (said she) that all things might be in common between us two. For believe me, I vow it most sacredly to you: were I a Woman, you are the only man I must love. However I will now make you an offer that may not (happily) be wholly disadvantageous to you, though it will add much to my Quiet.— Dear Sir (Interrupted Polydore) pray spare your Compliments, and assoon as you please propose if you can what I dare refuse to you. Come! To the Business; to the Business, Cousin, (said Miranda.) You shall know then Sir (continued Ariadne) I have a Cousin that is a rich Heiress, being at present possessed of twelve hundred pounds a year in Land, besides some thousand pounds in Money and Jewels: her Person is Tolerable, I think at least it is so, if mine may be thought so; for we are more like than any other two you ever saw. Her humour I think exceeds that Pardon me (interrupted Miranda) they are both so excellent, that it is no easy matter to determine which is most Beautiful and Charming. She is obliged to you (said Ariadne) her Age (continued she addressing herself to Polydore) is the same with mine, being very near Seventeen. You may believe in these Circumstances she could never want the Addresses of many Persons, and those (perhaps) of no mean Quality. But she is very curious in the choice of that fatal thing we call a Husband, for (I dare swear for her) she means to make no Property of him, but to love him as immoderately, unmodishly, and a● virtuously as ever Husband was loved, in the old Sacramental days of Matrimony! And were she mine, (interrupted Polydor I would love her so hearty she should almost complain on it: Not that I mean to kill her with kindness, for if I should attempt that, I die first myself, but I beg your pardon. Pray, Sir, proceed: I must then remind you (pursued she) how difficult it has been hitherto for any man to make the least impression on her Inclinations, which she is so sensible of, that she almost despairs of finding a man she could hearty love. I have often heard her though describe such a Figure of a Lover and of such Qualifications to herself, which made me once offer my Service to her in the search of such a one she had described, insinuating that I was the more likely to Succeed of the two, and the sooner; because my Breeches would admit me into that Company, which her Petticoats would exclude her. She readily accepted my offer, and was pleased to say, she was certain she should approve of my Choice. And now this very minute am I playing the Knight Errand to serve this Lady, which I would do with the hazard of my life, for assure yourself I love her as my own heart. You were saying (Sir interrupted Polydor) she gave you a Figure of the man she could love, pray what was that Sir? If it be not rude in me to desire it, nor inconvenient in you to show it. I beg you would proceed to his Picture. You shall have it Sir, (said she) assoon as I can get yours drawn. As for your humour you are sufficiently acquainted with that already; for your Quality, I know it by your Name. So that to save the expense of so much precious time, I am sure you need only consult your Glass, and you will see the very Man therein all Circumstances. O Dear Sir! (said Polydor) do not Impose on me, but I perceive this is but real Raillery, you have a mind to be merry: But, Come, Sir, my Service to you; this Glass will inspire us with another and (perhaps) as pleasant discourse. She saw him drink off his Glass fairly: And then answered, By all the truth Mankind is capable of, you do me wrong (Sir) to imagine that I have hitherto imposed on you, or that I shall ever hereafter endeavour it; besides, I am very sensible 'tis no easy attempt in any body, especially in me. Yet, give me leave once more to attack your unjust, and if I may say so your unkind mistrust of me, of what I have told you. By all the hopes I have of future Prosperity (pursued she) you are the Man. How can you be assured of that, Sir! (said Polydor.) I am absolutely Confirmed, assured and dare swear it (replied she) For, she see's with my Eyes, hears with my Ears, Understands with my Intellectuals, and thinks as I do. On my word, Sir, (said Polydor) you are a very dangerous Rival then.  
Alas, Sir, (replied Ariadne) were I your Rival; you have a great deal the advantage in your Weapon: And the Combat would be more Pleasant than Fatal. But be confident (continued she) you need fear no Rival, to my certain knowledge, she is passionately in Love with you: And to confess the truth, I was sent to observe your motions, and if possible to fix you so long as to make this discourse to you, with some overtures which yet I have omitted. Polydor all this time regarded her so earnestly, and so strictly surveyed her all over, that he hardly was sensible when she came to this last Period: But at length Recollecting himself, Sir (said he) allowing all this to be real; yet you are to learn the Circumstances, which at present I am under. But forgive me, after all the serious Faces you have used, and after all your earnest discourse, I am still suspicious of my own Merits, though (perhaps) not of your sincerity, and the assurance you have from her. And come continued he drinking to Miranda) my Service to you, Sir. Help me I beseech you to Divert this Gentleman's Melancholy.— Melancholy! (said Ariadne very eagerly, assoon as ever he had set down the Glass) 'Tis you that Impose now, for I see you are about to persuade me that I am a little civilly Distracted, or so.— But (pursued she vehemently) pray (Sir) let us learn those Circumstances of yours which we are yet ignorant of. Polydor seeing her somewhat concerned, did not know what Judgement to make of what he had heard, whether it were Real or Fictitious. But weighing deliberately the Mien, the Habit, Beauty, and Discourse of the Person, began tacitly to accuse himself of Incivility to a Person who at the first sight had offered him so considerable a Service, as Thirty or Forty Guinneys might ha' done him, had he accepted 'em, wherefore he concluded himself mistaken and rather the madder of the two; which obliged him very easily and modestly to reply; Sir, I most Religiously beg your Pardon for my own Madness in mistaking you so long; and that you may the more easily be Invited to so generous an Act I will tell you my Circumstances, and you will find what necessity I had to despair of my own deserts in so great an advantage as this might ha' been to me. You may (happily) have heard of my name (pursued he) if you do not know any of the Family, which I dare say is honest and not altogether Ignoble; my Father (let me speak it with Modesty) enjoys a plentiful Estate, Heaven be praised! However I am the youngest Son: And my Fortune is small enough. I have no dependence but on Providence and my own endeavours, if I should extravagantly continue to impair that little Estate my Grandfather left me; and already the better moiety is engaged, part of which you saw me just now make my last stake in this House; yet, give me leave to add, I am an Honest Fellow, true to my King, and my Mistress when ever I had one; no more a Gamester than my Ancestors, which (may be) was too much; I mean tho, not fond of it, but in hopes to improve the little pittance was left to support this Tenement, too little for the unruly Guest that fills it; for certainly I had never been so unadvised as to hazard my Estate, had it been any thing proportionable to my Humour; but at present I only possess 80 Pounds a year, the Remainder of 150 l. a year left me by the old Gentlemean I spoke of before. And now (Sir) if after all I have discovered to you 'tis possible this Lady should love me, she is a Prodigy of Goodness: But I hope, you are convinced she cannot. So far I am from being convinced that she should not love you for your slender fortunes (answered Ariadne) that it the more Confirms me you only must be the Man. For, these are the very Circumstances she could have wished to have met with in him she Loved; And when her Brother has told her she would sometime or other throw herself away, (as he called it) on some younger Brother, or Extravagant Elder Brother; I have often heard her protest, she had rather bestow herself according to the deserts of the Person, not his Land, since she bade enough to maintain both him, herself and her Children splendidly, without being obliged to any of her Relations. This I dare safely avow (interrupted Miranda) I have several times heard her declare it. Ay— But Sir, (said Polydor) what a pretty Life must that Husband have; when on the least difference imaginable the Lady Wife shall fly out to this Effect; Base Man● do you consider who raised you? God made you 'tis true; but he left you poor; I found you so and made you Rich? And suppose that by the advantage of her Forte●es he should be preferred at Court;— Was i● not I? Was it not through my means you are what you are? Was it not my Money Bribed such a Lord?— Alas poor Thing Thou couldst hardly ha● gone thither in a Hackney-Coach, much loss in a Coach of thine own, but that I taking pity on thy thin Shoes, gave thee Room in mine; nay more, in my Bed: More miserable wretch; more C●●sed Fool I! O damned Infatuated.— Hold, Sir, Hold! (cried Ariadne aloud) and almost out of Breath, or I shall burst my Spleen and Ribs with Laughing. Methinks you act it very naturally; ye are strangely concerned what ever's the matter: But give me the opportunity to Breath a little; and I will tell you, she is a Lady, if not of so good a Family as Polydor's; yet he should have no cause to blush at the alliance he may have, if he pleases. And since we do suppose her such; we may presume she has had such Education as would not allow the least disobedient Word to the Man whom she had once found in her Heart to Marry. And pray let me confirm you in this Opinion of her: But above all (continued she) be absolutely satisfied she Loves you perfectly. This I must urge too (said Miranda.) I am extremely obliged to the Lady (replied Polydor) But what does she expect of me? Reciprocal Love (answered Ariadne.) If you can find in your Heart (said Miranda) to cast yourself away on a most Beautiful, Young, Good Humoured, Virtuous, Well-educated Lady, with a good Fortune, and one that has a great deal of Love in store for you; say the Word, and you both may be happy. How now (interrupted Ariadne) I believe Cousin, you are in Love with her yourself!— But come, Sir, (continued she Addressing herself to Polydore) your Answer? When I see the Lady and have discoursed her a while I'll resolve you (said Polydor) for (continued he) I hope you are not so unreasonable as to propose to yourself that I should make you any promise before that. Still you are scrupulous I see Sir (said Ariadne) and let me tell you without a Cause: Dare not you take my Word? You know my Name by this time I suppose, and some of our Family (perhaps) if not— Or if I do (interrupted Polydor) I must still desire to speak with the Lady first; otherwise I should deny myself the use of my Reason; and that I beg you would not exact of me. I confess (replied Ariadne) that which you ask is but reasonable, but such is the Caprice of this Lady's Humour, that she is resolved the Person she designs for her Husband shall not see her Face till after they are Married. And in short, this is the hazard you must run: Consider on't! To Morrow till Eleven in the Morning is the utmost Minute she will expect you. You'll find her in the Park by Rosamond's Pond, accompanied only with one Lady more, both Masqued. She that gives you her Hand is yours for ever. These are hard Terms you'll say; But Remember, Nothing venture, nothing have. Ay, Sir, (interrupted Polydor) or faint heart, etc. No matter for the rest.— But pray give me leave to tell you, I hazard all the little Estate I have: Besides, perhaps, my Reputation, as 'tis not impossible but she may have loved before to my cost, should I Marry her, and then my Quiet follows my Reputation, or pray Sir pardon me I beseech you, for you may remember too, 'Tis good to look before we leap; I must urge what I can against you to satisfy myself; she may, instead of being so great a Fortune, prove a greater Cheat, and Mary me to keep herself out of a Prison.— Hold Sir (interrupted Ariadne) have I been all this while labouring to persuade you of her Virtue and Wealth to so little purpose! What do you see in me that should make you suspect the truth of what I have told you, after all the Protestations I have made! if she were a lewd Woman, or one who wanted an Husband to go to Goal for her; are there not a now in erior to you every way, that m●ght act such a part? in fine, Credit me; I am sure you may be very happy with her if you embrace the Proposals I have made you.  
I am in earnest, think well on't! This is the last time of ask. 'Tis some what a short warning she gives a Man; methinks (continued Polydor) she might enlarge the Bounds of her Resolution a day or two more. For, she will otherwise have but little Reason to commend my Discretion. No matter; she is already sufficiently satisfied of all your good Qualities. And she can't afford you one Second more. Nay (said Miranda) I know her so well, that I dare engage she will not yield you one Moment. she's very determinate then in her purposes! (said Polydore;) But methinks continued he) I Dream. No, Polydore, (said Ariadne) you wake: But you shut your eyes to your own good Fortune. Open 'em I beg you. I suppose, you may know or have heard of her Brother Sir Fr. Heartwell, inquire at his Lodgings of his Sister Ariadne, and if you find what I have told false concerning her Estate and Virtue, e'en go back again to drink or to play as your Humour shall then serve you. That's pretty fair (said Polydore:) But if she be indeed Sister to Sir Francis, whom I am very well acquainted with, why mayn't I see her before we Mary. No more Questions of that nature, Dear Infidel, (said she) I have partly told you the extravagance of her Humour, and one Caution more I am to give you; If you discourse one Syllable of what has passed between us to her Brother; you lose her for ever. To Morrow Morning you may satisfy your Scrupulous Conscience in the other matters. Well!— for once (said he) I may chance to trust Fortune, at least I shall take the pains to consult my Pillow about it; which I hope she and you will allow me to do. And all the reason in the World! (Replied Miranda.) By all means (said Ariadne) so Sir, my Service to you, (continued she drinking to Polydor.) This is the first time (said Polydor) that I am like to have the Honour of Pledging you: But for my part, what with drinking before the Play and since, I find myself pretty well to pass. Besides, it grows late. Well Consider (said Ariadne, pulling out a Golden Watch) 'tis now turned of ten; and I presume you may be weary of our Company, which has so long made you uneasy. However I would have you part with us resolved, if possible, to see this Lady that so Adores you, at the time appointed. I will endeavour, (Replied he) to persuade myself, which is as much as you can desire. So, immediately they called a Reckoning, which Ariadne would needs discharge: And then parted at the Door, Polydore walking towards Westminster, and Ariadne took Coach with Miranda for her Brother's House; into which they got the back way as they came Where we may leave 'em to shift themselves, for I hold it not convenient to peep into Lady's Privacies. In the mean time my Friend Polydore was making Reflections on what had passed; sometimes he was for going to meet 'em, then presently Cursing himself for being such a Fool as to give ear to so, improbable a Story as he then thought it. Staggering all the way home both in Mind and Body. At last he reached his Apartment to speak Gently; And I think, without saying his Prayers, he went to Bed; where he fell fast asleep till next Morning, about 5 or 6. When Waking, he began afresh to recall the last Night's Adventure, and the Proposition Ariadne made to him. Ha! (said he to himself) 'Tis very odd! Yet there is something in it looks very Rea● The two Sparks very Rich and Gay, especially my particular Friend whose Pockets were doubly lin d: That Watch, that G●●● and those Rings I took notice of on his ●●●gers, were marks of no ordinary Quali●● His Mien was a la mode, Easy and Sweet; His Conversation Free and Generous: Sure he can have no Ends in this.— How Fool! (Replied he to himself) is it not very possible he has been, and (may be) is her Gallant, who now is sated, and would willingly turn her on my hands, with th● advantage of a Great Belly. Yet as ●●●rid, why might not another Man, any Rascal might have served his ends. What shall I do? I am already fallen a Stern very finely; and unless I meet with a good Pilot I shall run o' ground to rights. This Lady then must be my Pilot, I was mor'd before, but now I only hold at one Anchor, and that too drags too fast. Well! I will ' e'en throw at all. Saying so, he was just going to leap out o' Bed; when a second and contrary Thought surprised him and threw him again on his Pillow. What art of going to do— Fool (cried he to himself) See all thy old Acquaintance some of 'em Witty, Satirical Rogues, others Da●n'd, Dull Dogs, all of them Barking at thee aloud; Is this the Spark we have so long mistaken for a Man of Sense! Is this he who was wont to help us Laugh at all those Sots that durst hazard their Carcases with one Woman for better for worse? And is this Jolly Debauche at last overtaken? Nay more, Jilted by a Lewd Woman, pretended Heiress? Very fine i' faith!— No, no, I'll ha' none on't; I shall hardly give 'em the Opportunity to ease their Spleens at my cost.— Yet— (continued he, turning on t' other side;) My little, new Acquaintance did urge what he said so vehemently, and with so much concern; that I must believe him.— Well— Hang't. The Die is thrown, and it is Decreed. At these Words out he jumped, as resolutely as Caesar into the Rubicon: Makes himself as fine as the best of three good Suits could make him! Puts all the Guineas he could then come at in his Pockets, which I think were just three. Then down he drops on his Knees, lifting up his Hands and Eyes; but where his Heart was at that time I will not pretend to determine. Well!— At length up he gets, and out o' doors he marches very courageously to Sir Francis', where he met just coming out, one of his Acquaintance who was very intimate with our young Knight. O Jack (said he assoon as he saw him) you are the only Man I could wish to have encountered! And, if you are not busy we must drink one Bottle this Morning. I am no Morning drinker (said his Friend) However, to wait on you, I don't much care if I take one Glass, provided the Wine be good. Where will you go? The blue Posts in the Hay market I think is the nearest place where we may venture our Carcases (answered Polydor.) Now, I really believe he was in the right on't: For, he had an excellent Palate for French Wines; I dare assure you: And I would assoon take his Judgement of 'em as any Man's I know. To the blue Posts than they went. Where, after they had each of 'em drank their two Glasses a piece; Polydor began to inform himself of Ariadne's Fortune and Humour, which he found answerable to the Character she had given him of herself the Night passed in every particular. The Gentleman who gave him this account did so enlarge on her Beauty and Gaiety of Humour, that Polydore began to be Jealous, he loved her himself: Which made 'em part the sooner by a Bottle or two. Polydor now longed for Eleven o' Clock, being perfectly resolved for once to make a blind Bargain with Fortune, and wholly Committed himself to her Guidance. I think, it was between Nine and Ten when he shook off his Friend; so he went directly to the Park where he expected Ariadne as eagerly as if he had Loved her for seven years together, and that the first time she had ever made him an Assignation. I can but think what Reflections he made on his Friend's Relation of Ariadne's Person, Beautiful (said he) to a Miracle and of an Humour as extravagantly Pleasant. Is she so, Sir (said Polydor to himself as he walked) so much the more happy is your Friend and Polydore like to be. Little dost thou think Dear Heart (continued he) that I am going to be Married with her this very Morning. And ' gad 'tis her own fault too. If she will throw away herself and her Estate on an Honest Fellow of a younger Brother; who can help it! The Devil take them that would hinder her for me. I speak nothing but Reason, I am sure. I think it is fit she should have her Humour. she's like to pay for't, I believe. He told me too, she Sung finely. That's another excellence I mightily well approve of. We may make shift to Sing two parts I fancy. Let me see! what new Song have I to Surprise her with! Charmante Douce, etc.— Damn these French Songs! No I'll Entertain her with plain down right English. As thus (said he humming it softly to himself.)  
Tho' your Pride be great as your Beauty,  
And my Vows you hear with scorn;  
Yet (Alas!) 'tis but my Duty  
Silently to Love and Mourn.  
In hopeless Anguish  
I'd choose to Languish,  
Rather than wish to break the Chain;  
'Tis more Glory  
Thus to Adore y●●▪  
Than o'er all your Sex to Reign!  
Pox on't! (said he) I made these Words myself to a French Air; I don't know whether she'll like 'em or no. But she must take 'em for better or worse, as I take her. By this time he found himself at the farther end of the Wall; I mean that end toward the Mulberry Garden that was. There I say, he found himself; for he was absolutely lost before in the Contemplation of his Mistress' Perfections. Onward he goes to Rosamond's Pond, where he no sooner Arrived, but he was Surprised at the sight of two Ladies in their Dress, Masqued. One of which, who, by the Richness of her  seemed to be of the better Quality of the two, presented him a most Beautiful, Soft, White Hand; without saying one Word to him. He took it, and seeting one Knee to the Ground, kissed it most religiously. I believe you may see the print of his Lips there yet, if she has not used some art to get it out. Well— he looked on it, and kissed it, and kissed it, and looked on it again: Then gazed on her two Delicate, Charming, Black Eyes through the peep holes of her Mask. And fancied to himself a Face, if not so Beautiful altogether as Ariadne's indeed was; yet such as the most excellent Painter could not have flattered if he should endeavour it. The other Lady was somewhat the Kinder of the two; for, seeing him stare thus Silently and Curiously, she pulled of her Mask and asked him if he had never a Tongue to praise what he beheld? No, Madam, (said he) not you yourself neither, so much, as it deserves; though you come so near the excellencies of an Angel. For, to give her her due; she was as Beautiful as any of the Sex, except Ariadne; for, I must maintain the Character of my Heroine, for a Reason that I know. But still,— I say give the Devil his due! Well. She was very handsome, and there's an end on't. Nay Polydore (said Ariadne keeping her Mask on) we know you are a Courtier. But 'tis a little odd (methinks) that you should so highly commend what you have not as yet seen. How do you know now (continued she) but this Mask covers the most ugly Face you ever saw! O 'tis impossible, Madam, (said Polydor in a Rapture) 'tis impossible, I swear, with those eyes. But how can you tell (said Ariadne interrupting him) but the Skin on't may be as black as the Velvet of my Mask. I believe it is as soft (said he very Amorously, feeling on the Mask) But Pardon me (Madam) your Eyelids have confirmed the contrary. I have seen, Madam (continued he) enough to complete your Victory. Dispose, Madam, (pursued he all over in a transport of Love!) Dispose how you please of your Slave. I was an Infidel last Night, 'tis true, but now I will believe, nay I do believe you are the greatest Blessing Heaven could bestow on me in this World.  
hay day! What a hopeful and sudden change is here, (cried Ariadne) sure this is not the same Polydor my Cousin saw last Night. No, no Madam, (said he) not a Word of that over Cautious, Scrupulous, and Ill natured Fellow. I have not one doubt about me: You appear to me all Glorious and Good. But we trifle, (Madam) Let us walk to the other end of the Park and take Coach for Mary Bone. Hold, Sir, (said she) there's a Coach waits us at this Gate; which, I presume, is as convenient. O most advantageous (said Polydore, leading her towards the Gate) where they quickly Arrived, and got into the Coach; which made all the reasonable haste to the Bowling Green that could be expected. Cry your Mercy, I mean to the Church. But I had been oftener at the first, which made it come sooner into my Thoughts.  
Besides I had forgot Polydore had any Business at the last mentioned place, whatever he has had at the Green. By the way, (said Ariadne to him) have you bethought yourself of a Ring? A Ring Child? (said he) no, faith.— But by good Fortune here is one on my Finger which a French Mistress of mine gave me at Paris; and we may make shift for once with it. Nay, nay, (said she) shift now and shift always. But come, it must and shall do. But hark you (continued she) done't you fancy we go as merrily to Execution as any two Condemned People ever did? You may call it what you will (said he) but (methinks) 'twas a little improperly spoken. Was it ever said a Man was Condemned to be happy? For such I apprehend my Circumstance at the present; I don't know what you judge of your own. O (said she) doubt not, I have as good an Opinion of you as you can have of me, for the Heart of you. I see then (interrupted Miranda) you are both in a fair way to be perfectly happy.— You know I must make her speak something, and not let her sit like a Mute all the while; much contrary to the humour of her Sex. Well— But— now or about this time they got within sight of the Steeple, Look there Polydore (said Ariadne) what do you think of turning back? Why (said he) I think of it as of the only thing I must deny you at the present. No, no— (continued he) I am resolved to enter the Enchanted Castle with thee, and try the force of its Charms. Ten to one interrupted Ariadne) you may find 'em too strong for you at a long Run. But for my part (she pursued) I am as Resolute as my Friend John Florio. And so (said she) Coachman open the Door. They all three immediately lighted and went directly toward the Church; just before they came to the Porch, a little dapper old Fellow comes to 'em; and asks 'em, if they had any business with him this Morning. Why faith Friend (said Polydor) if you can mumble over the Matrimony, or so— We have— How! (interrupted Ariadne) mumble it over! No done't you mistake! I mean to have it as Audibly, Distinctly, Laudably, and Plainly read, as ever I have heard part spoken on the Stage: But you are in the right on't Polydore (continued she) for this Right Reverend looks as if he could only mumble it. Well; Madam, (said the little Old Gentleman) I can make a shift to say Amen plain enough I warrant you. But Mr.— the Minister is within— And I believe at leisure by this time to do you that Office which he has doubt this Morning to four Couple more.— But, believe me Gentlefolks you are the finest we have seen today. O! We thank you, Sir, (said Polydor) But pray how long do you Ply here a Days? Ply here Sir! (said he) we expect Company here generally from Six till Twelve.— But see, Sir, (continued he) the last Couple are just coming out! I have a little business with 'em, e'er they go. If you please to walk up to the Altar, I'll wait on you before you have done your Compliments to the Minister.— O! your Servant, good Sir; we don't doubt it (said Polydor, leading Ariadne to the Fatal place:) There Polydor immediately opens their Case, discovers their Grievances, and asks a Remedy; Promising him to reward him like a Gentleman. And now (continued he, addressing himself to Ariadne very Obediently and Amorously as could be expected from any Man in his Circumstances) Now I hope you will discover those Perfections which yet I only Adore in Ideas too Imperfect to be called the true Shadows of 'em. How do you mean? (said she.) I mean (answered he) This Cloud must be removed that I may behold the Sun.— In short, Madam, this Mask must off.— She was very unwilling to unmask, but the Minister urging the necessity of it, she was at last obliged to conform. Polydor at the sight of her Beauty stood like a Statue, and was all over Ecstasied with the Apprehension of his future Happiness. But at length recollecting himself, he would fain have knelt to kiss her Hand, but she prevented him, Charging him to forbear expressing his Sentiments of Love, or any other Passion, till the Ceremony was over, and they in a more convenient place: It lasted not long in the performance, but the Effects I think remain to this day.  
After the last Amen, having before given the Parson a Guinney, and the Clerk and Sexton another, out of which they were to distribute half a Piece to the Poor, (for he was a mighty kindhearted Soul as lived, to my knowledge.) After all this I say, and 'tis true, they took Coach, and drove back to Lockets, where, by the desire of Ariadne, Polydore bespoke two or three pretty seasonable Dishes of Meat: And returned in all haste to say all the most obliging and tender things his Soul was capable of uttering.  
First he threw himself at her Feet, Embraced her Knees, kissing her Hands by force, and almost wept with Joy. Then on a sudden up he starts, and like a mere Tyrant in Love, falls aboard her delicate pouting Lip, and Lovely Rising Breasts, without so much as giving her the opportunity to chide him. Hold— Hold Polydore (said she at last) I must make Articles with you. Hear me I charge you. For this day is all mine, though it be the last I must command in.— O! say not so my Soul (said he almost out of Breath) Thou shalt ever command me.— Observe then (said Ariadne)— If you will sit quietly by me, and once in a quarter of an Hour kiss me; I will now force myself this first time to kiss a Man.— Ah (said Polydor looking on her very Amorously) though your Condition be somewhat ha●d; yet for the Blessing of a Kiss given me hearty by you; I will forbear as much as Flesh and Blood can. Stand fair then (said she) and look on Miranda. O I beg your Pardon (cried Polydor) I shall lose the satisfaction of encountering your Eyes then; which is above half the pleasure of your Obligation; though I could easily be persuaded to look that way, were not Ariadne here. Well then (said she smiling and blushing at the same time) I'll shut my Eyes. O that's cruel (cried Miranda:) No, no, fair play ought to be, Cousin: Come Advance, and do't as you should! Can you Instruct me then? (said Ariadne.) No matter, Madam, (interrupted Polydor) Let Love instruct you.  
Well! Have at you then (cried she throwing her Arms about his Neck, and shedding Tears which I ought to have called Pearls, according to the Laudable custom of other Writers: But these were only Briny Tears, nothing else in the World; which she merely distilled from her Brain through excess of Joy, I presume:) Now my dear Polydore (said she giving him a Thousand Kisses) Are you now convinced Ariadne loves you? I am so well convinced, and so extremely sensible of my happiness, (said he) that I would not change circumstances with the happy and Amorous Mark Anthony, were he now living with his Cleopatra. O (said she, retreating a little) I must take care you do not surfeit on't. Too much will cloy you. Ah! how Cruel are you now (said Polydore, pursuing her) can you imagine I should surfeit before I have tasted! How! Before you have tasted! (replied Ariadne) Why, I believe by this time you are able to distinguish the touch of my Lips, from any Ladies in Town, though in the dark, or hoodwinked; you have already been so familiar with 'em. Alas Madam, (said he) this is but like a Walk and a Glass of Rhenish before Dinner to whet a Man's appetite. Or would you have me be satisfied only with the smell of a Dish of Meat that I Love? No, Madam (continued he) Consummation is the substantial part of our business. That is yet behind. I don't know what you mean by Consummation (cried she) But (methinks) I have already done you all the right in the World.— But (continued she looking toward the Door) I am obliged to the Waiters who have just brought up Dinner, to prevent any farther descant on so unpleasant a Subject. Come (pursued she very eagerly) Let us sit, I am hungry. Ay faith and so am I too (said Polydor) and yet though Grace is said and the meat ready, you won't so much as bring it to the Table, that I may fall on. No more Nonsense (interrupted Ariadne.) 'Tis here already, and you may eat if you please. Come! Let us sit Cousin (continued she looking on Miranda) The Gentleman (perhaps) has no Stomach yet. Gad but he has, and a swinging one too (said Polydore;) and that you shall find Dear heart, e'er long.  
With that he sat him down at the left hand of Ariadne, and eat like a Soldier in a Siege: But drank little. Much good d'it you Don, (said Ariadne) you are welcome to our English Flesh; I fear you have but little on't i' your Country: For, to say truth, and speak plain English, you feed like a Farmer. I thank you, (Madam said he, with his Mouth full, and looking another way) so methinks. But (continued he, pulling of his Peruke) you shall have better proofs of my eating e'er I ha' done yet. Hold! Good Sir! (cried Miranda) pray keep on your Perurke, or I fear we must bespeak another Dish. You may bespeak a dozen more if you please Madam, (said he) but I'm afraid you are like to find none of the effects of my eating. No, nor any body else but yourself I fancy (said Ariadne.) That's as time shall try, sweet heart, (said Polydor) But— you may chance to Groan for it.  
Ariadne could not choose but Laugh down right to hear him talk and see him eat so hearty. And I believe she was well enough pleased with his Stomach; for some reason that shall be kept secret at this time.  
But pray Sir (said she Laughing) Do you always eat thus? Always Honey! (replied Polydor) Ay: I think I do Child. What then? Why, nothing, (said she) but only I think it most convenient we should go live in Wales, or in some other County, where Meat is cheaper than it is here, or you'll eat us out of House and Home.— Nay-gad (said he, looking a little surly) you need not grudge me my Victuals, for you are like to reap the benefit on't. I thank you Sir (replied Ariadne) But I don't care for't at second hand. Lord! (cried Polydore lifting up his Hands and Eyes) what a delicate reasonable Wife have I got! I warrant (continu d he looking pleasantly on Ariadne) you could be satisfied barely with Kissing, Eating, and Drinking with me. Nay, I can't tell that, (said she) But I see you are providing against the worst. No, no, Dear Heart (cried Polydore, transported with Joy) for the best, for the best Ariadne! Nay, (said she) I know ne'er another of the Name besides myself, and if all these pains be taken, for me, I am much obliged to you: for (methinks) you sweat at it! I shall before we ha' done (said he) no doubt. Thus did they eat and talk till they were weary of both. The Cloth was taken away, and the Glass went round merrily as long as one Bottle lasted. Then fell Polydore to kissing again: Till he made both himself and his Lady mad: And I'm afraid he did not a little disoblige Miranda; who was fain to go humming about the Room to divert the Thoughts that sometimes did Assault her.  
Well now (cried Ariadne) I swear I can endure no longer! Pray sit farther, and let us parley a little.— You may remember (continued he) you gave me a Ring to day. Ay (said he,) I fancy I did, what of that? Only I mean to return your kindness (said she) pulling of a Rich Diamond-Ring of her finger) pray wear this for my sake,  
And now (continued she) I must beg you would Entertain yourself with the Bottle till our Return; for my Cousin and I must be private for a Minute or two: And that you may not altogether be Drinking, pray take the pains to tell over this Gold, (said she throwing a Purse full on the Table) There should be a Hundred pieces: See (Sir,) Your Servant for a time.  
Nay, nay, said Polydore, I like the Employment pretty well, since I must be robbed of thy dear Company so long as these two Minutes. Good Sir, (said Miranda) done't be Jealous, I'll be your Argus. If I thought my Ariadne needed Watching, replied he, I would even leave her to the wide World; And her own Roving humour. This he spoke Kissing her, she dropped him a Curtsy and out she went with Miranda.  
He presently fell to telling the Broad pieces, which he found exactly an Hundred in Number: He put them up very carefully, and laid them again on the Table: And took a March three or four times about the Room. At last he bethought himself, and takes to the Bottle. Well honest Polydore, said he, her's to thee: Thy dear Ariadne's good health. But I gad methinks she stays sweetly. He drank off his glass, and expected almost a quarter of an hour longer with indifferent Patience. But seeing no Ariadne come yet, he called up a Waiter, and asked him, where the two Ladies were, that went down about half an hour ago? They took Coach Sir, said the Waiter, assoon as they left you: Why 'tis Impossible. Thou art Drunk sure! Saying so: He took up the Gold in all haste, and ran down to the Bar to be more fully satisfied of his Misfortune; which he was too soon. He ran up into the Room again, like a man distracted where he shut the Door to himself, and fell a railing at all Women kind, What! fitted thus, said he, 'tis very devilish: What a dam'd Sot was I to l●t her go! But rather what an Eternal Coxcomb to Marry such a Jilt! This is no more Ariadne, I warrant, than I am Ariadne. 'Tis impossible a Person of her Quality and Education should be guilty of so lewd an Action! Where the Devil should she go! Or what Business had she, but with me! I find I am merely drawn into a Prison: Ay, ay, she's in Debt, i'll lay my Life on it, and I must suffer the weight of all the Actions that are laid against her.— So, hay for a Prison! But may she not happily be gone to her Brothers? Then shall I look on myself as a rash, Jealous Fop. Well (continued he) I am resolved i'll see. Immediately upon this thought, he flies down Stairs, calls for a Bill, but he was answered, 'twas all paid. Paid, Ha! marry (said he to himself) I like the Matter the better for this. Come, come! Cheer up my Heart! All may be well yet. He call d presently for a Coach, and on he drives to Sir Francis': but just as he came near the House, his Courage failed him, and he was set down within five or six doors of it. He stood still sometime considering what he should do, whether it were Convenient to go directly thither and ask for her, or to pretend a Visit to her Brother, and so learn in discourse, what was become of Ariadne. But at last, he bethought himself of a better Expedient: He knocked at the door, and asked if his Friend were there, with whom he drank in the Morning. The Footman that opened the door told him, he was just risen from Dinner with Sir Francis: Prithee, then tell him (said Polydor) I would speak with him here. The Footman did so, and presently led him to Polydor. O my dear Friend (said Polydor with a great deal of Concern) I must needs drink another Bottle with you this Minute; you shall not deny me: I am so very Melancholy and out of humour, that you will be very unkind if you do. Well (said he) I'll but just make my baise les mains to Sir Francis, and stay one half hour with you: He just went in and returned to his perplexed Friend. They went to the same House again, where they drank their Morning's Draught together: And Polydore began his Circumlocutions before he came to the business. Dear Friend (said he) how happy am I to meet thee again at a time when I stood in most need of thy Company: I have met with un untoward Accident since I left thee; which has. so disturbed me I cannot yet Compose myself. But come! (continued he) Help me to divert the thought on't. Let's drink and talk of things indifferent! When saw you the Beautiful Ariadne whom you so loudly commended in the Morning? Not since last Night (answered his Friend) she went out o' Town this Morning before seven o' Clock as far as St. Alban, to a Cousin of hers who is taken desperately ill; one whom she loves most dearly. Sir Francis went with her himself as far as Highgate: She had an Hackney-Coach and four Horses that waited on her thither empty, till she left her Brother. Ha! (said Polydor) does she go often out of Town, has she such frequent Excursions, She's hardly at Home (replied his Friend) three days in a Week together. A pretty sort of a Lady (cried Polydore:) Is it a he Cousin, or a she Cousin, she's gone to Visit? A very pretty Lady 'tis isle assure you (said he.) Why dost not thou strike in with this same Ariadne, or with some of her fine Cousins? (said Polydor.) O she's too great for me! Besides she has been engaged to a Person of very considerable Quality above these three Months.  
O Cursed Jealousy! A hopeful Spark, and a kind Friend indeed was this same Marwood to Polydore! Now she was no more Engaged than her Monkey. Only he loved her himself, and spoke this least his Friend should have any thoughts of attempting her. And indeed he said enough to make Polydor mad, and to confirm him in the opinion that he had Married a Cheat instead of an Heiress. However, he forced himself to look and talk as pleasantly as was possible for a Man in his Condition: till at last the Bottle being out, Marwood was in haste to be one to his beloved Knight, which made both part very easily with one another. Polydor for his part walked very disconsolately into the Park, to the fatal place where he first saw the false fair One, as he was pleased to call her in his Dumps. The first thing he reflected on was the Pond. Humh! (said he) Rosamonds Pond! What a dull Beast was I not to apprehend the ill Omen, in the very Name of the place where we first met! that ever I should hope to find an honest Woman at a place that took its Name from a lewd Strumpet! Very fine, faith! As if it were impossible to encounter a good Woman there because of the Name it had! When I dare say, I have seen above twenty Citizen's Wives and Daughters at that very place; Nay, if I should say forty, I should not Ly. And whether they could be light or dishonest, I leave all the Town to determine. Nay, more, I myself have walked thither with a She kindred of my own, of about 7 or 8 years Old, but I must confess, I cannot swear she was a Maid, yet it is not improbable but she might be a very good one. But now to our Hero, who all this while has been Cursing the Pond, and Comparing himself to a decoyed Du●k. Heavens! (continued he) was not the sight of those sufficient Caution to thee, to prevent thy Ruin! Then bending his thoughts another way (he pursued) I am glad I did not Bed her: I'll sue her to a divorce now, and swear point blank she stole me.— (Did not he talk like a Madman now!) But he soon recollected his straggling Senses, and (cried) Fool that I am! was ever such a thing heard of! O Death and the Devil (continued he) Whoever She be, She is Beautiful enough to tempt any man to make me a Monster! A Cuckold! Which (perhaps) is just now in Agitation.— O Justice! Justice! How many of my own intimate acquaintance have I served so! Not to name Strangers and Foreigners.— Well! I am at last overtaken, and now I pay for all! For all of them put together could never have made half such a Beauty as my false Ariadne! My Jilting Ariadne, my Devil, Damned impostor Ariadne! Yet one Comfort is (continued he looking on the Diamond Ring she gave him) My Cheat is a Cheat of Quality: for I am sure this Stone is Right, and the Gold is good old Gold! Marwood said she's gone to St. Alban; why let her go to the Devil! who would ride twenty Miles to see himself made a Cuckold! Ah but (continued he) That is the true Ariadne. Well!— True or false, I'll write to her. But first I'll go Play off ten or twenty pieces that I may write more easily.  
In this Resolution he went to look for Company, at most of the Gaming Houses in Town; and at last he met two or three of his Acquaintance at Banisters in the City, where he fell to Play; And fortune, as if she designed to make him amends for the trick she played him so lately; threw every Die to his advantage, so that in two Hours time, he had won above forty Guinneys: So we'll leave him, to find what's become of our two Ladies Errand. They were by this time gotten almost as far as St. Alban: for 'twas true, that her Brother left her at Highgate in the Morning; but he was no sooner out of sight, but she turned and made for St. Jamese's, but assoon as she came into Town, she bid the Coachman take out two of the Horses, and so went to meet her Polydor.  
Now, her Cousin was in as good health as I am at this present writing praised— for the same (as my Mother's Maid, I remember used to begin her Letters, when I writ them for her, about twenty years ago.) But it was a trick of Ariadne's to cover her real design of Marrying that very Morning, who had counterfeited a Letter as from her Cousin, whose hand she knew perfectly well, and show d it to her Brother. But (perchance) you will ask me why she did not take her own Coach and Horses to perform that Journey? for certainly that was easier, and looked greater! But did ever I tell you she kept a Coach? yes, now you shall know she did. However, she foresaw the inconvenience if she had met Polydore in her own Coach; and besides her Servants would have been witnesses of what she intended to conceal, had she returned to Town with them about her. And again, I believe she was willing to spare her own Horses. Now are you satisfied?  
As they were within two Miles of their Journeys End (said Miranda to her fair Cousin) For Heaven's sake what is in your mind, that you leave your Husband the very first day of your Marriage? I should not have wondered had you left him after the Honeymoon; I mean if you had fairly taken your leave of him for a week or so: But this (methinks) is a little inhuman. Alas! How dull thou art my Dear! (replied Ariadne) I design to try his Patience and his Constancy; and all the World shall not dissuade me from treating him much more severely yet, for some days: I Married him too soon, to be acquainted with all his Humours; but I am resolved, I will know most of'em, ere we come closer together. And I think it is but a just Punishment for his easiness, in so soon believing a Stranger, in a matter of so great Importance. I like his Address and Discourse well enough; nay so well, that I was obliged to make the more haste from him, lest he should have made me repent of my purpose.  
Nay, (said Miranda) I very well know the pretty innocent extravagances of your humour, and am sensible, you are not to be prevailed on to forbear them, especially when they carry with them any show of Reason. But (continued she) how long my Dear dost thou intent to torment him? Why— This day Seven-night (replied Ariadne) I mean to give him myself, and all that I have for Ever, and Ever, and Amen. Well be sure you do (said Miranda) Or I'll be certain to discover all to him the very next day following. I give you leave (cried she) but not a word on it before, if thou hast any kindness for me. Be confident (said her Cousin) I will be silent. Nay, 'tis your best way let me tell you (replied Ariadne) for fear I should be revenged on you, and let Marwood know how passionately you love him. You won't be so inhuman I hope (interrupted Miranda) do you think I shall ever be able to see any of our acquaintance again if you do? Never disturb yourself (said Ariadne) I only show you how easily, and bravely I could be Revenged on you, if you begin first.  
By this time they found themselves at the Lady's House they went to Visit, they presently alighted and went in; where they were received with all imaginable Kindness and Respect, and the more because their Coming was unexpected, and the obligation pleasantly surprising. Here I must take my leave of them, and look a little back for my friend Polydore: who that Night came off a Winner by threescore Guinneys, pretty well laden with Wine too, which made him sleep that N●ght the more sound, (perhaps) without ever so much as dreaming on his Bride; for Wine let me tell you, is a Sovereign Remedy against Love, especially if the infection be but newly received: Besides, he was a Man of a strong Resolution, and could swagger it out most Modishly: yet when he gave his mind to it, could Love like a Sparrow, and as Constantly as any Turtle. In the Morning he waked between 7 and 8, for you must know it was passed One ere he got into Bed: and he usually slept six hours upon a Tack, and that che●fly when he had been Drinking over Night. The first thing he did was to examine his Pockets, which he found pretty weighty on one side, and on the other all his old Gold entire in the Purse. His hands indeed were dirty, and he had all the other signs of a Bacchanalian, but an empty Pocket. He was generally very pleasant, and witty after a Debauch; for he was always sure to drink the best Wines. Well! He lay till Eight reflecting on his Good and Evil Fortune, at length, after he had stretched and wished for his Ariadne; false or true, she would then have served turn: After that (I say) he turns out and dresses. When he had done that, and his Devotions, he sat him down, and writ as follows.  
To Ariadne.  
Madam,  
I Had the good Fortune yesterday to be in a place where I presume you dropped a Purse of Gold and a Diamond-Ring, which I am come to restore, and only beg, you would permit me the honour of kissing your hand: I fear, I am utterly a stranger to you, yet I beseech you (Madam) Refuse not this Obligation to  
Your Ladyship's most Obedient, Humble Servant. Beaufort.  
When he had Written it, he knew not where to direct its And was in a Thousand Perplexities about it, but in the end he took heart of Grace, and resolved on a Visit to Sir Francis Heartwell, with whom, 'twas ten to one, but he found Marwoud. He took Coach then immediately, and came soon enough to his Brother in Law's House to take him at home; and to his greater satisfaction there was Marwoud too: Tho he did not in the least contribute to his Information of the place of Ariadne's Retreat, as it happened. For, after the first Compliments were over, Sir Francis sat him down to make an end of a Letter, which he was then dispatching to his Sister, to inquire of his Cousin's Health, or if there were any need of his Presence? Assoon as he had finished it, he desired Marwoud to fold it up, Seal it and Writ the Superscription? For (said he) I have not seen Polydor so long, that I am unwilling to lose one Minute of his Conversation. You! must direct it (continued he) To my Sister, at my Lady Courtin's, two Miles wide of St. Alban ' s. Polydor, overjoy d at such a Blessed Opportunity of seeing the true Ariadne with a Letter from her Brother. Immediately offered his Service to present it to her; Adding, It could be no trouble to him, because he had obliged himself to be at St. Alban by two o' Clock at farthest. Sir Francis told him, by no means he would be guilty of such a Rudeness; and that he had already commanded one of his Servants to deliver it, and to bring him an account of his Cousin's Health, the next day assoon as possible. Polydor urged on the other side, that he must of necessity return himself too, the next day, before Dinner, to meet Company at Banisters. However, Sir, (said the over Courteous Knight) I can by no means permit it. Polydor was then just going to tell him that he had business with her, and discover the Ring and the Gold to them, and how he came by 'em; but that he considered, if they should not prove Sir Francis' Sisters, they would but Laugh at him for his Credulity; or, if they were really hers; she on the other side might be displeased at the discovery  
But after all, he determined with himself to set out with the Knight's Servant, and to his greater Comfort, he understood the Footman was not to begin his Journey till after Dinner: For he was to carry some things with him from the Change, which could not be ready till about one. Polydor therefore had time enough to provide him of a good Horse; which he did assoon as he parted from Sir Francis and Marwoud.  
After he was fixed with every thing for his Journey, he betook him to a little Alehouse almost over against the Knight's House, whence assoon as he saw the Footman come; he mounted and followed him at a convenient distance. 'Tis true, he let him ride a good way before him till they got clear off the Stones; but about a Mile out o' Town, he overtook him. O Friend (said Polydor) well overtaken! Your Servant (said the Footman) I'm very glad that I shall have the honour to wait on you most part of your Journey. I thank thee (replied Polydor.)— But— What! (continued he) Is it your young Lady, Madam— A— Ariadne that is sick? No Sir, (answered the Servant) 'Tis a Cousin of hers. Nay (said Polydor) I only asked that Question, because Mr. Marwoud gave me this Letter just as I left your Master and him, and I think he talked of something there was of advice in it: Saying so, he gave him his own Letter to Ariadne. Is this for my Lady Sir (said the Footman.) Yes, (answered Polydor) for your Master's Sister. I'll take care to deliver it, Sir (said the Footman.) Prithee do! (replied Polydor) There is an answer required, and pray let me have it; for, I have engaged myself to bring him whatever she is pleased to send him. I Prophecy (said the Servant) What her answer will be: For I am sure this is a Love-Letter. Nay, may be so (cried Polydor.) However (continued the Footman) I'll deliver it very faithfully to her, for I have a great respect for my honest Master Marwoud. I'm sure. (added he) I have had many a Half-Crown of him, nay, many a Crown, I may say; since I have known him. O (cried Polydor) if thou hadst not spoke on't, I fear, my Memory is so Treacherous, I should ha' done thee wrong. Here (continued he pulling Money out of his Pocket) Here's a Guinny for thee which he sent thee. I thank you Sir, (said the Footman receiving it) But he is always too bountiful; I would ha' served him ten times more without a quarter of this. No doubt of that (said Polydor) But prithee (continued he) what answer dost thou think she'll send him? Alas Sir (replied the Footman) a very cold or scornful one, I fear. Then she does not Love him? (said Polydor) O, no Sir: I believe (said the Footman) she would not endure to see him, were it not in Complaisance to Sir Francis. How so! (cried Polydor) he is a handsome Man. Ah, Sir! (answered the Footman) As long as she does not think him so; what advantage is his handsomeness to him; in that case! thou'rt in the right (said Polydor) But— How long has he loved her? Above these 2 Years (replied the Servant) They had a great deal more discourse concerning Ariadne's Scorn, and Marwoud's Love, which Entertained 'em till they came within two Miles of the House where the Footman was to go. Now (Friend, (said Polydor) since, as thou sayst, we are so near the Lady's house; show we some little blind Alehouse or hedge Tavern as nigh it as may be: That I may expect an answer of Marwoud 's Letter, by thee assoon as possible. I will Sir, (said the Footman.)  
So they Road on a Mile farther, and the Footman Lodged him at a little thatched House, where they sold good Nappy Ale. There Polydore treated himself and his Horse, which drank Ale as freely as his Rider did Claret. Polydor was Cursing Marwoud hearty, though as yet he was not certain whether it was his Ariadne or no. In the mean time the Footman came to his Post, and delivered his Letters.  
Ariadne not knowing Polydor's hand, and being very curious to see what was in his Letter, opened it first: and looking then on the Name, she was much more surprised by reading it; she began to guests who ' 'twas. What manner of Gentleman (said she to the Footman) was he who gave you this? A very fine handsome Gentleman Madam, (replied the Footman) something with the tallest, delicately shaped, yet very strongly set, of a dark brown Complexion, and hazle Eyes, with a few marks of the small Pox in his Face. By this Description she knew it must be Polydor. Well (said she smiling, which she could not forbear) done't set up your Horse yet, you must go fetch the Gentleman hither. With that she goes immediately to the young Lady her Cousin, to whom she had already related her adventure with Polydore, and desires her Assistance in tormenting him a little. (Said she) I must get you to Personate me. Here is the Letter he sent me. But you must tell him, you know nothing of a Ring or of Gold: these and a few more Instructions made the young Lady Dorothea, (for so she was called) very perfect in her part. Miranda and Ariadne were to keep out of sight.  
When they had agreed upon all circumstances to deceive him, Ariadne sent the Footman to tell Polydor, that his Lady Ariadne, desired to see him, and charged him, not to describe her Person to him, but to bring him directly to Dorothea.  
The honest Fellow obliged her very exactly, and brought Polydore to Dorothea, who by this time really thought herself to be Ariadne. Polydor at the sight of her, was so confounded and grieved to find it was not his Ariadne, that he was ready to sink down. Dorothea seeing him in that rueful Posture began first, Sir (said she) I suppose this is your Letter to me. It is (Madam) replied Polydore, fetching a deep sigh) but I find my Error, you are not the Lady Madam. Indeed I am not Sir, (answered Dorothea.) No! (Madam Interrupted Polydore, with a piteous Groan) To my Eternal shame, Sorrow and Confusion, you are not my Ariadne. Pardon me, I beseech you Madam! and to show you that this is not merely a Pretence; see here the Ring, and the Purse of Gold, which I wrote of to your Ladyship. I once more beg you would forgive this Rudeness, and forget Beaufort. I am your most Obedient Servant Madam, Continued he bowing and went out.  
The Compassionate pretty Lady was so concerned for him, that she was once or twice going to call him back to discover the fallacy to Him: But knowing Ariadne's humour she durst not: for fear of disobliging her. However she went to her, with resolution to chide her severely, for so ill treating so handsome a Gentleman (as she called him) and one who She durst engage loved her most passionately. So much the better (said Ariadne) I am glad to hear it. But ere it be too late (continued she) I must dispatch this Fellow that came with him to observe where he takes up his Quarters, for you have not performed half your part with him yet. O Heavens! (cried Dorothea almost ready to weep) I am resolved I'll not torture the poor wretch any more. Let Miranda do't an She will!— So I promise you, She should (replied Ariadne) if it were convenient, but She knows her too well. And in short (continued she) you are the fittest Person alive. My Dear (pursued she, sweetening the tone of her Voice, and kissing her Cheek) you must oblige me. Nay (said Dorothea) since my Ariadne says there is a Necessity for it, I shall obey. Well (said Ariadne) I thank thee my Dear, I'll instruct thee presently, assoon as I have sent this Footman after him. Which she did immediately, and returned to her fair Scholar, and her Dear Miranda. Now (said she to the first) You must know I will write a most passionate Love-Letter to him, as if I had fallen in Love with him at first sight, and invite him hither, where you are to second what I shall write, and pretend you are deeply in Love with him. O fie! (interrupted Dorothea) I profess you impose a very difficult task on me; and to say truth, I am the rather more avers to this, lest in pretending it, I should really Love him— O! No, (replied Ariadne) think on me, and you are secure enough. Yet I vow to you (interrupted Miranda) 'tis very hard to Counterfeit love to a Man of his Address and Person. Very fine (cried Ariadne) I see I have two dangerous Rivals of you. Yet this must be done. Be satisfied! (said Dorothea) It shall, It shall. Thus as they had been discoursing, and plotting against poor wretched Polydore, for about an hours space; The Footman returned and gave them an Accountorious as my betaken himself to the litt●ut●es of the House where he left him at Ay (pursued how long he would continue there, he could not positively say.  
Ariadne upon this wrote a Letter immediately, as she had before designed, and obliged the Compassionate Dorothea to Act out her part, while Poloydor lay Raving on a Flock-bed in the little Alehouse, not at all regarding or fearing the Vermin that might assault him. Now if I had been he, I would rather have sat down and drank with my Horse, than have ventured my Boots in so suspicious a Place. For all my delight is in clean Linen, (as the Wench said when she washed her dish-Clout.) But he not at all Curious, Solicitous; Anxious or uneasy for his Apartment; began a large and bitter satire against Women; and concluded with no great Encomium of his own Discretion. Ah (said he) was ever man so Credulous! so easily deluded; by a little Lewd ●ilting Scrumpet! O Beast! and which is worst, O, Cuckold! (continued he, scratching 〈…〉 ●re it did not itch.) Now had 〈…〉 ●enchify'd, and had it been 〈…〉 ●e, or Fall of the Leaf, it were not Ridiculous to suppose he might have Entertained his finger's ends with a budding Maid or two; But I dare assure you, he was as sound as a Roach, and besides it was Summer. Yet though he was thus tender of his Honour, he could not but admire and commend to himself his Ariadne's Beauty and Humour. O! (cried he aloud) were not this Creature false, (for did you mark? that's generally the first word your Jealous or forsaken Lovers call one another) had she not been false, (repeated he) she were worth a Thousand such Ariadne's as I saw last, yet I must own by the little notice I took of her, she was extremely Beautiful too!— But (continued he all in a rage) my Devil is so Charming, that if she were already really a Devil, (as in time no doubt She may) she would invite a Saint to her Embraces. Well! I am a Cuckold! and I'll go herd in the City, my Horns will not be perceived there: at least they may not be so notorious as my Elder Brothers the Deputies of the Ward where I fix. Ay, Ay (pursued he) and I'll throw off my Sword, and turn as great a Cheat as any Tradesman of them all! As great a Rebel, and as great an Hypocrite as any Puritan Villain among them, nay more (added he fiercely) I cou●d almost find in my heart to write-Pamphlets against the D. and call the King's late most Gracious Declaration a Libel. But hold, said he coming a little to himself, It must not go there. No, let her be damned by herself, I will not persuade myself to these Impieties lest I keep her Company. Ah, Polydore! continued he; what will thy Mother, thy Brother, thy Sisters, and all thy Relations say to this, will they not scorn thee? will they not point at thee, and shun thee? For there is nothing in the World so contemptible to each other, as Relations, when any one of them Miscarries. Nay, and it carries with it some show of Reason. 'Tis a disgrace to the whole Family! What says one, Marry a Whore! A Jilt! O Devil!— Why I shall become a Town-talk! Be sung about the Streets in a Ballad to the tune of Fortune my Foe. Married! says another, with a Plague, what need he have Married! He always seemed averse to it.— But I beg your pardon Sir, pursued he, If this Woman had been really what she pretended, I would not have been unmarried for an Empire.— But she's False! and I am Lost, Ruined, and Eternally miserable.  
If all this should be true now that he says, there is no body but would pity him. But Well! He said no more for the present: only he hurried up and down about the Room most Violently; as I have seen a Mouse looking for a hole to escape at. In this motion Ariadne's Messenger found him, and delivered his Lady's Letter to him, which held these words.  
SIR,  
Though you mistook, when you thought you had found a Ring and Gold that belonged to me; yet I am not mistaken in accusing you, as the Man that has stolen my Heart and Robbed me of my Quiet: which unless you immediately restore with your Presence, I am resolved to haunt you, as long as I am  
Ariadne.  
hay day, (cried Polydor with a scornful Smile) What's here! more sport for Fortune! Her Ladyship (methinks) is merrily disposed at present. Pray honest Friend and fellow Traveler (said he to the Footman) what does your Lady mean by this? Alas (Sir replied the Footman) I thought that Paper had fully discovered her Intentions to you: I am only to entreat you would please to let me wait on you to her Immediately. Humh! Immediately! (cried Polydor to himself) Her Ladyship's mighty warm on the sudden! But I' gad, she's mistaken her Man, as it happens. The curse on't is, nothing will go down with me now, but that same other false Ariadne. How ever I shall oblige her so far for her Brother's sake, for Civility's sake, and for our Family's sake, who never refused a Visit to a pretty Lady. There may (perhaps) too, be more Gold, or more Rings coming: but I fear, I shan't deserve 'em. Poor Lady! I'm sorry for her. I am an Elder Brother in my humour, and cannot drudge for a Livelihood. Well! Come Friend (continued he turning to the Footman) I'll go with you, so on they walked to the Lady, where I'll leave 'em a while.  
His Guide soon Conducted him to the Couterfeit Ariadne, who expected him in her Closet, assoon as she saw him, she was in such disorder, and her thoughts were so confused, that she could not say one word to him. She blushed and cast down her Eyes, as if she had really been Guilty of loving him. Polydor took notice of it; And began, showing her the Billet she sent him. If this Paper (Madam) has discovered more than you will own, be pleased to condemn it to the Flames, and Sacrifice it to your Indignation. I must confess (continued he) 'tis that has occasioned you the trouble of a second Visit— By this time she had pretty well recovered herself, and answered him. 'Tis true Sir, that Paper has caused the Confusion, which (perhaps) you might observe I was in at the sight of you. But if it had not done me the good Office of discovering my dearest thoughts to you; believe me, I should have had no little difficulty to persuade myself to it. And (continued she) I must needs Justify what you have read there. But I must Chide you, (pursued she with an obliging Smile) I must Chide you Beaufort for calling that a Trouble, which is the greatest Obligation you could have done me at present. Pray sit (said she taking him by the hand) they both sat down, Polydor fixing his Eyes on hers, as if he seemed to ask them what she would be at? You expect (perhaps said Dorothea) that I should make an Apology for my Modesty, which probably you may think I have violated, in treating thus familiarly with a Stranger. But I shall only say, you are very unkind if you do, since you were the cause of it yourself. And give me leave to add, 'twas Love, 'twas Almighty Love that forced me to this Extravagance. Besides (pursued she) I did not know how soon you would leave us and the Country: nor could I tell where to have enquired of you. Madam (replied Polydor) I confess, it had not been very easy to have met with me by that name. And I beseech you pardon me (continued he) and I will undeceive you. He paused, but seeing she expected he should proceed. My name (pursued he) is Polydore; I am not altogether unknown to your Brother Sir Francis. Why then (interrupted Dorothea) did you borrow an other name. Because Madam (replied he) I would have been wholly disguised to you, for some Reasons that are not fit to be discoursed. And I beg you (Madam added he) not to press me to the discovery of them. Alas! I do not mean it Sir, (replied the fair Impostor) I have other Business with you, and of greater Moment to myself. I have Proposals to make to you which (happily) may not prove absolutely Disadvantageous to you, if embraced. I love you (Polydor continued she, without suffering him to speak.) And I love you so passionately, that I can be capable of no rest, nor sensible of any Joy; unless you justly answer me. Nay Madam (Interrupted Polydore) As for that matter I can Love as fast, and as well as any man. And I am ready to do your Ladyship any Civil Kindness. Ah (cried she) I fear you mistake me, Polydor! my desires and designs are honest and Honourable.— We must Marry (continued Dorothea) if you mean to make me Happy; If you will not kill a poor Lady that languishes for you. How! Marry!— (Interrupted he) you don't know what you ask Madam. I wish I could with all my heart! But I have seen enough of that already. I hope in Heaven (cried Dorothea all in a surprise) you are not Married. Are you? If I be not; (answered Polydor) I have seen the fatal Consequences of it in others: No, no Madam (continued he) no more of that! such another word and I shall Swoon, though I ne'er use to do so. Why (replied Dorothea) am I so contemptible then? if you are any way acquainted with my Brother, you may (perhaps) have heard my Fortunes are not. And (pursued she) could it enter into your thoughts, that the Sister of Sir Francis Heartwell could ask any thing but Marriage of you, after the Declaration of her Love? Ah (Madam said Polydore Kneeling) for Heaven's sake forgive me! I am certain you would (added he) if you knew my wretched, Cursed, Circumstances. Heaven knows (pursued he, looking very Amorously on her) I would soon embrace so advantageous an offer if it were convenient for either of us. Seek not I beseech you (continued he with a sigh) seek not to know the miserable Obstacle. Be satisfied, I am lost (Madam!) Condemned to perpetual Infamy while here I Live! My Reputation is Damned, my Fortune and my Rest for ever broken: And my Liberty is no more! Ah pity Madam, (pursued he with a hearty sigh) pity a miserable Creature, that is not capable of receiving the Happiness your Goodness would throw away upon him! And now (continued he rising) Permit me I beg of you to retire, and Curse my Evil Stars, which have heaped so great Misfortunes on me, only for my Credulity; suffer me I Conjure you by your Excellent good Humour, to retire, that I may Rave freely alone! that I may either shake off the thoughts of my Misery, or sink under 'em. O Heavens! (cried Dorothea weeping, which by no means she could refrain,) such was the sweetness of her Temper, I pity you from my Soul. Alas! I cannot but be too sensible that you are much Afflicted. And I wish hearty it were in my Power or Art to relieve you. You may go (continued he) since you must, and will go. But I beseech you, as ever you hope to regain your Quiet, Let me at all times know where to find you. Be confident Madam, you shall (said Polydor kissing her Hand) and making his Obeisance very humbly to the very Door, he left her gazing after him.  
When he was quite out of sight, she went to her cruel Cousin whom she raillyed severely for making her Instrument in Torturing the Poor mistaken Polydor.— But to her greater dissatisfaction, she understood, that she had a Scene or two more to play of her part yet: Which Ariadne began to instruct her in. While Polydore retreated to his little Thatched house; where he weighed every Circumstance of this Last Adventure.  
Heavens! (cried he) was there ever so unfortunate a Fellow as I am, to be abused by a Counterfeit Ariadne, when I might really have had the true one! But, perhaps, I had never seen the last had it not been in quest of the first. 'Tis stranged Methinks, there is still something that hangs about my Heart and will not let me hate that naughty Woman, nor I fear I should receive her again, were I assured of her Virtue: Were I confident she were not in Debt, or had I but an Estate to pay her Debts, whatever they were; upon the assurahce of her truth to me: I should take her into my Bosom. O easy Fool that I am! I am certain I should. she's witchingly fair! I cannot for my Soul forget her Beauty. Her Humour too so justly answers mine; that 'twere too great a Blessing for me to enjoy her had she but Honour too.— But O! (continued he) I have lost a Diamond for a Pibble. Is that so strange! Alas! I have lost myself.— But well (pursued he) I'll to Town, and strive to divert the Thoughts of my ill Fortune and Disgrace with Company and Play. I may meet there with somebody as wretched as myself: And then we'll sit and Rail, and Curse Fortune, Women, and our own Follies— Hold, Polydore! Hold! (pursued he after a little Pause) Does this become the greatness of thy Spirit! No; I will suffer quietly and silently. I'll be as great a Stoic as the best of 'em. Nay more; I'll bear my Afflictions like a Christian Woman, I forgive thee. Thou hast not Damned me yet. Thou hast only made me forfeit all my Happiness on Earth, unless I find it here, here in my Breast. I first must drive thee out and then I may. Alas! Thou couldst not help this Treachery! It is Entailed upon thy Sex. Heaven has ordained that you should all be false. Made Soft and Fair the easier to Deceive.  
'Twas not the Fruit nor Serpent ruin'd Man:  
O no! The Woman looked the Sin into him!  
She Smiled and raised strong Appetites within him:  
The Mighty Charm prevailed! The glorious Bait.  
He speedily devoured; and in one moment  
Thus Poisoned all his Pure, Immaculate Soul!  
And left his Sons weak Preys to's subtle Daughters!  
So (continued he Recollecting himself) I can Preach I see, upon occasion. However, this is no place to Preach in; the Night comes on apace; I will to Town in spite of Darkness. With that, he called for his Horse and a Pen, Ink, and Paper; which with much ado he got: But, I believe, his Hostess was forced to tear a blank Leaf out of the Practice of Piety or some such Book; or, for aught I know, it might as well be torn out of the Famous History of Valentine and Orson; which indeed, is the most likely of the two: For as I understand, it was a Quarter of a sheet of Paper; on which he wrote a piece of his Mind to the Counterfeit Ariadne, giving her notice where she might direct her Commands to him at any time; which he dispatched to her by a Messenger he found there, who undertook to deliver it that Night for a Tester. So, immediately he mounted and came for London; where he Arrived about eleven at Night: He set up his Beast very carefully, and stayed till he had seen his Bed made, and till he had eaten a hearty Supper of Corn. Then— God-a-mercy Horse (said Polydor) and left him to provide for his own self; which he did; taking Coach and driving directly to his Lodgings; where he vowed, Prayed a little and Sighed more, so put out his Candle and went to Bed. What with Travelling and Vexation, he was so tired, that he slept very sound till seven the next Morning, without the help of Wine. When he ' risen he found himself much better for having drank so little the Day past: But still he found his Troubles return into his Thoughts, as fresh as ever. He knew not what in the World to do, to ease himself. At last, he bethought himself of his Friend Marwoud: To whom he resolved to discourse his Misfortunes at large and ask his Advice, what to do in his miserable Condition: For, he had fully determined in his Thoughts to drink no more so largely and frequently as he had done hitherto. To his mistaken Friend than he goes, finds him hardly awake, in Bed. What! Not awake yet (said Polydore, drawing open the Curtains) Who's that? (cried Marwoud, rubbing his Eyes) O Polydore! What Returned already! Will you believe your Eyes, or no, (replied Polydor) you see I am. Hardly (answered Marwoud) for faith thou hast made such haste 'tis almost incredible to me! Since, I presume, you stayed some time with your Friends you went to see: And for my part, I declare to you, I don't love to ride so hard: But did you not travel some part of the last Night? (continued he) I did, (replied Polydor) I should notlike that without Company (said Marwoud) 'tis dangerous, there are Highwaymen abroad every Night on that Road: Besides if it were never so clear of them; I should nevertheless be Assaulted by all the Melancholy Thoughts my Soul could muster. Ay! (interrupted Polydor) Those were my Entertainment all the way. I never was so melancholy in all my Life, (added he) nor ever had reason to be so: How? Prithee why? (said Marwoud) sit on the Bed and let me hear the reason. You shall (said Polydor sitting down) I am Married my dear Friend (continued he, embracing Marwoud; sighing and almost weeping at every word) At last, he summoned all his Resolution, and made shift to discourse all his Adventures with Ariadne to him, which he did in such piteous Accents and with such mournful Gestures, that Marwoud often sighed in Consort with him. But, perhaps, it was more, because he understood that Polydore had robbed him of his Mistress, though he did not know it himself. But as if it had been to make him more enraged; Polydore shows him the Ring and Gold Ariadne left with him. Marwoud soon knew the Purse and the Ring. Which made him say, coldly, On my Word, I should think by this she were a Person of Quality; but her leaving you so strangely confirms me in a contrary Opinion, Polydor then proceeded to tell him how passionately in Love the true Ariadne was with him, all along mistaking Dorothea for her. But (said he tenderly embracing Marwoud again) I will have nothing to say to her, because, I know your Heart is engaged there. How came you to hear that (said Marwoud?) The Footman that I overtook on the Road discovered it to me, by a trick I put upon him. Well then, cried Marwoud, how do you like the true Ariadne? What manner of Woman is she? for, perhaps, continued he, you may be still deceived. That's impossible, replied Polydore, and to convince you that I am not, I will describe her to you. Her Hair is of a pale brown, her Eyes are Grey, full and Languishing. She Lisps a little; and she has a Mole on her left Cheek which become her extremely. Nay, nay, I'm sure 'tis she.  
Well I am satisfied; said Marwoud, who knew well enough 'twas Dorothea, ●y the Description:  
He presently imagined 'twas one of Ariadne's Caprices that set Dorothea to personate her. He began to be very uneasy, and impatient of Polydor's Stay.— When Polydore asked him, Am not I the most wretched Creature breathing? Dost thou not pity me hearty? What shall I do? ●rithee assist me. And a thousand other things that a man in his Condition might propose. He replied, I believe 'tis Nine a Clock; I must rise to take Sir Francis ere he go out. What? shall I drink a Bottle with you at Night? I will not fail to meet you at Eight, at Lockets, or where you will. I'll see you ther● if you please (replied Polydor) bu● I can't Drink. You dull Dog (said Marwood to his Valet de Chambre) ar● these Clothes for this Wether? Wha● occasion have I to Sweat this Wether more than I must of Necessity? Do● your Rogueship think I'm Poxed! yo● are but an ill Physician to prescri●● me a Sweat, amidst all this Heat, 〈◊〉 I were. The poor Devil answered nerens word, but with all submission imaginable brought him another Suit that looked a little Cooler. He put it on and dressed, till he had occasion for his Peruke; by ill Luck, that which he designed to wear that day, was not Combed out.— Defend us! How many Dammees? How many Oaths? How many Insipied Rascally Negligent Beasts were there uttered! Polydor observing him out of Humour, did not know what certainly to attribute it to, but thought it very convenient to leave him. Marwood (said he) good Morrow! To Night at Eight, at Lockets; remember your Servant, answered he in the same Tone, he had spoken to his Valet de Chambre.  
Down Stairs went Polydore, and not long after Marwood took a Chair and went to Sir Francis, where he appeared very much discomposed, all along; insomuch tha● Sir Francis took particular Notice of him. Marwood (said he) What the Devil ails thee? Thy looks are enough to give the most Costive Body a stool! What's the matter? Come, impart, impart 'Tis not wholesome for your knowledge of all men's, (replied Marwood) 'twill blister your Ears if I relate it. You seem to imply (said the Knight) that it Concerns me. And your words have raised my Curiosity to that height, that you must explain 'em, or I cannot esteem you my Friend. My silence (answered Marwood) is now the greatest Argument of my Friendship to you that I can make you. I beg you would not.— Prithee do not beg (interrupted Sir Francis) thou hast stirred all that was Woman in me, and now I must know; thy very Endeavours to conceal it makes me impatient of this tormenting Silence. There's Mischief in it, let me know it. Mischief! I think there is (cried Marwood all in a Rage) Mischief, Base, Treacherous Mischief! Why then art thou so long ere thou lettest me know it? (said Ariadne's dear broth. r) Too soon (said Marwood, shaking his spiteful head, and shrugging up his Shoulders, you will know too soon, the Lady your Sister Ariadne is Married.— Married! (said Sir Francis, keeping his Temper and his face.) Why, then God give her Joy! Can you then so Tamely hear such ill News? (cried Marwood) that your Sister is Married basely, below herself to a Man of no Fortunes, or at least of very small Fortunes, and those too decaying! And without your Knowledge! With all my heart, let her Marry without my Knowledge (replied Sir Francis) But what base Man is he, she has made her Husband? Pray what is his name? Do I know him? yes, I think you have seen him (answered Marwood) and in my Company. Pox o' my Loggerhead that ever I brought him near you!— Prithee (interrupted the good humoured Gentleman) who is he without any more Harangues, let me know his Name, if he has one, I beseech you. 'Tis Polydore, that Treacherous Beggarly Villain! (cried Marwood, his Face all over glowing with Rage and Envy.) Polydore! (said Sir Francis) have a care Marwood what you say! He is a worthy Gentleman and of a good Family, besides he was your Friend. I am hearty glad 'tis so well with her, after all the fears you put me in for her. So well (cried Marwoud. 'Tis true; she might have Married a Hangman, a Cobbler, or a Porter for all you I see; But I don't apprehend how otherwise she could have done worse! The Extravagant Prodigal knows how to spend her Fortunes, and his own too, were they both doubled. Is this all the care you take of your Sister! How now Marwoud! (said Sir Francis putting on a serious Look) what do you mean by this Discourse. Pray keep your Reprimands till they may be more seasonable: will you instruct my Care and Love to my Sister! If I have offended Sir, (answered Marwoud) 'tis through the excess of my Friendship, and Zeal to serve you. I could not think such a Lost Fellow as Polydore, a fit Match, for the incomparable Ariadne. It seems (replied her Brother) Ariade thinks so. And once more I give you Caution, that you treat him at your discourse of him, as he is a Gentleman. If not for his own, and his Family's sake, yet at least as he is my Sister's Husband, and my Brother,— But how came this Wedding about. Marwoud told him every Circumstance as Polydore had related to him, but (added he) I fear he has disguised the Truth, and that he surprised her, and forced her consent to Marry him. If so (replied Sir Francis) I shall take an Honourable Revenge on him: we'll go down to Morrow, and learn the Truth. But I fear, Marwoud you love her, yourself: I have long suspected it, and 'tis Jealous hate that makes you judge so ill of your happy Rival. I hope (replied Marwoud ready to burst with Anger, which he durst not vent there) I had not been altogether so Contemptible and disproportionate a Match; had I been so happy as Polydor. I grant your Estate is proportionable (replied Sir Francis) but how unequal your Humours may be, I know not. And (perhaps added he sharply) she is as Happy as she has disposed of herself, as if she had proceeded according to your deliberate Instructions. 'Tis very possible (replied Marwoud.)  
The next Morning they came to Dorothea's, where I fancy they were expected, because they were so Civilly entertained. Assoon as Sir Francis found his Sister in private, which you may, be confident was before Marwoud had the opportunity of conversing alone with her. He told her all that Marwoud had related to him, all which she owned, who certainly gave her the greatest animosity imaginable against a Gentleman of his Principles, and Circumstances. 'Tis true she was Revenged and that by good Fortune, for (perhaps) Marwoud durst have fought any man on equal terms of Honour or Advantage. He was a Spark that could Love as hearty for interest as any man Breathing! He had a strange Command over himself in Conversation! And would seldom speak Truth, for, that is the rudest thing imaginable, especially if a man always does so. You are to know then, that assoon as her Brother had made this Discourse to her, Ariadne singled out Marwoud, and led him into the Garden. Is it possible (said she) that a Gentleman and your friend, should impudently and falsely report to you, that I was Married to him! and is it not as strange that you should give Credit to him on so slight Circumstances, as the sight of my Ring and Purse. Look here (continued she, showing him the Letter Polydore had written to her, under the borrowed Name of Beaufort.) See now are you not finely abused. But I perceive very faint appearances will prevail on you, to believe the worst things imaginable of me. Ha! (interrupted Marwoud in a pleasing surprise) Are you not then Married to him? Why can't you yet give Credit to me! (said Ariadne.) Why then (cried Marwoud) do you suffer him to wear those things, which are much more precious in their having been worn by you, than an hundred times their Value could make them? ●ou see (answered she) he entreats here ●hat he might kiss my hand; which by no means I would permit, but prevailed with Dorothea to personate me, when upon the first sight of her, he cried she was not that Ariadne he looked for, and left her without returning any of 'em. By Heaven but he shall return 'em Madam, (cried Marwood in a fierce tone) and that ere to Morrow this time. I would not (said Ariadne) Encourage you in any ill design of Revenge upon my Account; but truly I must say, he deserves to be punished for his Indiscretion.  
What a Devil did this Woman mean now, (some will say) to set this Fellow to Murder her Husband, Let them know she was resolved to try his Courage as well as his other Virtues; for undoubtedly she was the most humorous Creature Breathing. And I dare say, she wished from her very Soul, that Polydore might come off Victorious, and Chastise Marwoud for his Tattling.  
They said not much more on that Matter, because they saw Sir Francis leading Dorothea and Miranda to them 〈◊〉 they joined Discourse presently, o● News, and things indifferent, which lasted about an Hour: when they were told that Dinner waited them on the Table, they all went in, and those could fed hearty; Marwoud's Stomach was full already, with his Resolution of fight Polydor, and I think he Eat but little, but drank the more. And assoon as Dinner was over, he took the opportunity to leave the Knight and Ladies in a very hot Dispute, concerning the Constancy of Men, and the Inconstancy of Women, in affairs of Love.  
Marwoud had gotten on Horseback just as they were beginning to be warm in their Arguments, and ordered one of the Footmen to tell Sir Francis, if he should ask for him, that he was gone to make a Visit to a Drunken friend of his about 7 or 8 Miles thence; and that he should not wonder if he did not return to Night, for he doubted there might be hot Service.  
Having left this Charge with the Servant, he Road for London, with all the Convenient speed that might be; where he found himself about Nine a Clock. He was so Impatient, that he hardly could give himself time to change his Boots for Shoe, ere he went to see for Polydor.  
By good fortune for him, he could not light on him that Night: But the next Morning early he took him in Bed. Polydore (said he) you must rise I have Business with you. This he spoke in a Tone so different, from that he used to salute his Friend in formerly, that Polydor almost guessed what he intended, which made him say Rising, Certainly your Business with me is very strange and urgent, that you Visit me thus early, and with that unusual Roughness which you are not wont to accost me with. But (continued he) I am ready to give my Friends all manner of satisfaction becoming a Gentleman. I know it Polydor (said Marwoud) else I had not given myself the trouble to call you to an Account, for an Injury done to a Person of Quality, and my most respected Acquaintance. I don't know what you mean (answered Polydor) but I'll give you the best account I can. You must restore the Ring and Purse which you pretended was given you by Ariadne. How! Marwoud (said Polydor) pretended to be given me!— And must Restore them. Prithee to whom? To me (replied Marwoud.) No Marwoud (cried he) Not so. Bring me to that Ariadne that gave me the Ring, and left the Purse with me; and you may prevent farther Mischief. Talk not of preventing (said Marwoud) I came to seek it. On my word, replied Polydore, you are fonder on't than I am. However I will help you to as much as may satisfy you, within this Hour; if you please to let me see you behind Clarenden House. Well! Good Morrow (said Marwoud) I'll expect you there an hour hence.  
He went directly to the place appointed, where Polydore after he was dressed, according to a laudable Custom which he had always observed; threw himself on his Knees, and recommended the Care of his Soul and Body to Heaven: And I believe, if with Honour he might have avoided it, he wo●●d not have fought any man in cold Blood, much less one that had been his Friend. He could not yet imagine what obliged Marwoud to demand the Ring and Gold.  
He went considering on the odness of that Morning's Encounter, till he came to the aforesaid place, where he found Marwoud ready to receive him, with all the Gallantry and Resolution of a Generous Enemy Said Polydore, I could wish Marwoud, that this matter might be otherwise determined, than by the Sword. Especially between us two. 'Tis in vain (replied Marwoud drawing) The Sword alone must end this Dispute with one of our Lives. Forbidden it Heaven (said Polydor standing on his Guard) Marwoud was very Furious and Violent in his Passes, which Polydore very calmly put by. But Marwoud continuing very eager, made one home Thrust, and slightly wounded Polydore in his left Arm; who immediately threw himself into his enraged Enemy and ●●●arm'd him. Here Marwoud (said Polydor) take your Sword, I will not injure your Courage so mu●● as to expect you s●●●●d ask your Life. What damned misfortunes this! (cried Marwoud receiving his Sword, I thank thee Polydor; but I must again employ it against thy Life! I must be ungrateful (continued he) my unhappy Circumstances oblige me to it!— That's somewhat hard (replied Polydor) however I cannot fear to fight that man a second time, whom I have once disarmed. And now Sir (added he with a threatening Gesture.) This bout may be more fatal to you than the former. I'll take it as it comes (said Marwoud.)  
They both made several Passes, and Polydore was run quite through the right Thigh, but it was only a Flesh-wound, having missed the Sinews. This vexed him hearty, and he pressed most Vigorously on his Rival, insomuch that he made him retreat about two yards of Ground, and pursuing his Advantage ran him into the Sword Arm, almost as far as his Breast. There his Sword was so engaged, that he could not easily get it out: mean while Marwoud was shifting his own Sword into his left hand, that he might shorten it, and run him into the Back, but Polydore prevented him by throwing him on the Ground, where he took from him both the Swords. Marwoud's he stuck into the Earth, and broke it short almost to the Hilt. Now (said he) Marwoud thou hast the Reward of Ingratitude farewell, if thou canst; I'll send somebody to help thee, assoon as I reach the Town. No, hold! (said Marwood) let me walk with you. I have my due, and I am satisfied. And I thank Heaven that we have both scaped with Life. No thanks to you though Sir (said Polydor.)  
They both made shift to get to St. Jamses, where they took Coach, and were both Carried to the same Chirurgeon, who assured 'em there was no great danger on either side; but Marwouds was somewhat the worse. When the Wounds were dressed, they embraced very kindly, and were as good friends seemingly, as ever they had been formerly. I dare engage that Polydore was real, but for Marwoud, I can not say much, for he played him an ill trick after this.  
They parted for the present and went to their several Lodgings. About twelve a Clock Sir Francis came in puffing haste to Marwouds, whom he found upon his Bed asleep, and in a fine breathing Sweat. He was going to steal away softly to leave him to his Repose, but (it seems) he could not avoid making so much Noise as waked Marwoud. Who's there (cried he.) Your Friend. (said Sir Francis) I'm glad to see you alive. How is it with Polydore? Marwoud was amazed to hear him ask so pertinent a Question, not apprehending how he should know any thing of their last dispute. I think Sir (said he) Polydore is as well, if not better than I am: I'm sure his Fortune was. But in the name of wonder how came you acquainted with our Difference? Ariadne when you were gone, was fearful of what might ensue on what she had said to you, (replied Sir Francis) and could not rest till she had told me where you were gone, which brought us all to Town this Morning by ten a Clock, in hopes to prevent what I see is already too severely performed. Ay alas! (cried Marwoud) with too severe Success on his side; Curse on this weak Arm, that could not reach his Heart. I am hearty glad it did not (replied the Knight,) for I should certainly have lost a dear Sister had it been so, that either of you had fallen. O no! (interrupted Marwoud) had the wretched Marwoud fallen as low as Hell, what had that concerned the Adorable Ariadne! I must confess (added he with a scornful Smile:) if the most Accomplished, and thrice happy Polydore had Died; 'twere enough to have broken any Lady's heart. 'Twere enough indeed (answered Ariadne's Brother) to have broken my Sister's heart, had you Killed her Husband on her Account. How! (interrupted Marwoud in a great Consternation) is she then really Married to him after all this? after the Letter she showed me, to persuade me of the Contrary! 'Tis even so after all (replied Sir Francis.) And you ought not to be be troubled, if I desire you to receive him always as your friend. I may be Civil to him (answered Marwoud,) but I fear I shall never really love him. In short (added he) I shall hardly ever endure to see him again. Come! Come (said Sir Francis) this is not like a Man of Honour: I must and will have you perfectly Reconciled. That's as time shall try (replied Marwoud,) but at present it appears to me as impossible, as it is to recall Yesterday. O! (cried Sir Francis) This is only the Effect of your late Animosity. But (pursued he) pray make haste and recover, that you may restore my Friend again to my Arms. You may come to my House Conveniently enough in a Chair: but I would not have you be too hasty to leave your Chamber. I'll send Ariadne to Visit you in the Afternoon. In the mean time take care of yourself. Saying so he left him without expecting his Answer, and went home.  
Marwoud did not at all like the Compliment his Friend made him, of bringing his Sister to Visit him: But he considered, he should at sometime or other be forced to see her, unless he could altogether resolve to forbear Conversing with her Brother, which made him put himself into the best Posture he could to receive her that Afternoon.  
Mean while Polydore fared a great deal better for he could make shift to walk, with the help of a Cane, and the Wound in his left Arm was scarce of any pain to him. Yet he thought it not altogether necessary to leave his Chamber for a day or two; which obliged him to send for his three old Companions whom he used so constantly to meet at Lockets or one Gaming-house or other. They came according to Summons; and expressed some little kind of trouble for that unhappy Accident, which he told 'em was a fall from his Horse. To play they went as briskly as at the Groomporters: And Polydor's Hand held in most luckily! There was indeed some reason it should, for, he Treated 'em very largely and generously with Wine and cold Meats.  
While they were thus throwing away their Money and Time, Ariadne accompanied only with Miranda, came to see her Maimed Soldier Marwood. Which, I believe was no little satisfaction to her, finding him no worse: For, she concluded her Polydor's Case was not so dangerous; having heard as much from her Brother at Dinner. Madam, (said Marwoud to her) you do me too much Honour, and yourself too great a trouble in this Visit; but, perhaps, 'tis a pleasure to you to see me thus vanquished by the Man you had made your Husband, notwithstanding the endeavours you used to disguise it to me. You mistake Sir (replied Ariadne) if it be any pleasure to me to see you in this Condition: 'tis because, I hope it is much worse with Polydore, for, I have already had time enough to repent my hasty Marriage with a Man of his mean Fortunes, and hateful Humours: And I come now to give you the opportunity of revenging yourself and me too. But first, pray give me a particular Relation of your Duel.  
He did so, with much uneasiness; ●nd when he came to that part of the story; How! (said Ariadne) Had you the ill fortune to be twice disarmed by him! Yes (Madam, replied he vehemently) I had that damned confounded ill fortune, for, I am certain it was not through my want of Resolution that it succeeded so well with him. I dont suspect it was (answered she) But I come now to pour Balsam into your Wounds; I mean those of your mind; promise me but secrecy and truth! 'Tis neither Treason nor Murder I dare assure you. Let me know it I beseech you (said he greedily) I will attempt it; notwithstanding I have been unfortunate on your behalf in this last Enterprise. Alas (said Ariadne) 'tis the easiest thing imaginable, there's not the least shadow of danger in it. But you promise Fidelity, and Secrecy so much as to my Brother? For Heaven's sake do not doubt me! (Madam, said he.) I will not (continued Ariadne) your Province then is to lay an Action o● Ten Thousand Pounds on Polydore, in any body's name, under pretence tha● the Debt was Contracted before Married him, manage this as cunningly as Revenge can instruct you; and I doubt not but to be rid of an Husband for some time, if not for ever! For, he not being used to a Prison may the sooner take the infection of it and die; I have been told that there is no Prison about Town but has a peculiar Distemper belonging to it. Ha! (cried Marwoued) This is pretty well designed! Let me alone (Madam) to Execute it. I'll about it the first thing I do, assoon as I can go abroad, and I am persuaded, it will not a little Contribute to the Cure of the wound he was pleased to bestow on me.  
Ariadne thanked him for the readiness with which he embraced her Propositions; and after a little other discourse of things not altogether material to their Circumstances; she took Miranda with her and left him to reflect on this Blessed Opportunity she had given him, of being in some measure revenged on a Man whom now he mortally hated.  
With great impatience, he lingered out a Week: And when he venture d out o' Doors, the first thing he did, before he had returned any of those Visits Sir Francis was pleased to make to him in his Chamber, was to enter an Action of Ten Thousand Pounds against Polydore in Wood-street Compter, at the Suit of Sir Tenacious Heedy: The next was to learn when he went into the City, which he heard would be within two days. He made a Visit to him on the very day he was going, and offered him his Company into the City which was very kindly embraced by Polydor. Heavens! How Solicitous and industrious is malice, to compass its devilish ends! And how easily is an honest man deceived!  
The unwilling Polydore takes Coach immediately with his treacherous friend for the Sun-Tavern behind the Exchange, where he had engaged to meet some Friends; but they were no sooner gotten within Ludgate  the Coach was stopped by half a dozen Officers belonging to that Blessed place I told you on before; who presently seized on both their Swords, and would have hall'd Polydore out, had he not calmly asked 'em what they meant, and promised to make no resistance if they could show any Authority for what they did. One of 'em told him, he had an Action against him, and would show him the Warrant, assoon as they came to any Tavern, that he should name; and withal, like the rest of the wheedling treacherous Fraternity promised him all the Civility imaginable, provided he would obey the Kings Law. Well (said he) let the Coachman drive to Fowlers at the Half-Moon. The Rascals liked that well enough, and very obediently trudged along by the Coach sides till they came to the place aforesaid.  
Marwoud all along seemed Amazed at this Accident, and appeared as the most Concerned man of the two. Now (said Polydor to one of the Officers) at whose Suit am I a Prisoner? At the Suit of one Sir Tenacious Heedy (replied the Rascal) here's the Warrant Sir, you may read it if you please. Certainly friend (said Polydor) you are mistaken, though I confess I find my name here, but may there not be more of my name than myself think you? for upon my Reputation, I never so much as heard of Sir Tenacious— Devils name till this time! Pray what is he? A rich Merchant (answered one of the Furies) and belongs to the East-India Company. Then be satisfied (said Polydore,) I never had Trading with any of the Profession in my Life. No Sir that may be (returned one of the Goblins) for, I suppose it is a Debt contracted by your Lady. O damned Impostor! (cried Marwoud on a sudden, who had instructed this Rogue before.) It must be so I am confident, if the Officers have not mistaken you for another. 'Tis impossible we should Sir, (said one of 'em.) This Adversary was with us when he took Coach at to their end of the Town, and told us this Gentleman was the Debtor. Dear Harpies (said Polydore Smiling,) How could you forbear your Prey so long! O Sir! (replied one.) you were out of our Territories till you came within Temple Bar, where yet we did not think ourselves secure enough of you, because of the Templars, and some desperate Blades that we might have met with in Fleetstreet. You have reason Sir (said Polydor smiling) I think here within your Dominions 'tis a matter of Imprisonment, at least for a Gentleman to draw his Sword in his own defence: It scares your whining Zealots out of the little Sense they had. Besides they are always apprehensive of their own Gild, and fear the Punishment they might reasonably expect from the Sword, for their Rebellious, Seditious and mutinous Endeavours against the Royal Prerogative. I'll tell you (continued he all in a flame, not so much for his own Circumstances, as with Zeal for his Prince.) I will not be Prisoner within these wicked Walls, within this City, in whose Great Streets and highest Places, the best of Kings. (O hellish Riddle!) That Glorious Martyr for the Liberty of his People, was proclaimed a Traitor! I say, I will not be confined to herd one Week to amend with 'em, lest I get the Infection; at least if a Hundred pounds will remove me to the Kings-Bench I will not.— Why the Devil could not my Kt. Merchant Adversary have taken me at our end of the Town? Was there a Necessity that I must be brought hither to this Stage, where the factious Schismatics are playing the old Gaim again with some of the same Cards, only the Knaves are all Changed! where little Machiaville is playing his Pranks! A worthy Puss indeed!— But there are Dogs that may Worry him at last. While he raved thus; and Marwoud walked frowning about the Room. The Officers you may be confident were not Idle, they had topped off a matter of Seven or Eight Bottles of Canary, and devoured the best part of two Neats-Tongues. At last one of them begged leave of his Gut, to speak to Polydor. Well Sir (said he! What do you propose? will you send for Bail? Send for a Whore Sir; I'll go to Prison, (cried Polydor) O fie! (said Marwoud) do not think on't! If I thought my Bail would be taken, I would offer you my Service. O by no means dear Friend! (replied Polydore, Embracing the Snake) I am resolved to stand it out myself. Then (Interrupted one of the Troublesome Attendants,) Since your Worship will go to Prison; yet, however you shall not go into the Compter, but if you please you may Lie at a Prison House over against it, till you have Composed this Business. No Sir I'll go to the Compter upon my word, (replied Polydor.) Indeed you shall not, nor must not, (said Marwoud,) who wished nothing more in the World than that he might Ro● there.  
What Exquisite Mischief may be done with the face of Friendship! I am sorry (answered the true and faithful Polydore) I must be obstinate, but I have some Reasons for it. Now (the Deuce take me) If I know what Reason he could have for it: Unless it were to avoid the Extortions of a Sponging House; which nevertheless, had he been in the Compter so often as I; he would have endured, rather than have seen the inside on't. Indeed Sir, I would not advise you to go into the Compter; you will find it very disagreeable to your humour: The Prisoners there will be all ready to tear you in pieces for Guarnish, (said one of the Officers.) I shall prevent 'em (Sir) for I'll pay it (said Polydor.) Nay, if you please to like it Sir; Replied one of 'em whose Brother in Law kept a Sponging House) you may go into the Prison. But there's the Turnkeys' Fee, and seven shillings a Week for a dirty, dark hole, with Cobwebs about your Bed instead of Curtains. When if you would be persuaded (Sir) you may lie in as good a Bed as my Lord Mayor, and have what Meat and Drink you please, and Dressed how you please, besides, the Liberty of walking down into the Dining Room. But I must pay for it Sir (Interrupted Polydore) I shall have there my Landlord, who (perhaps) Drinks like a Dane, Cringes like a French man, Grins like my Lady's Monkey, when he sees Money coming; but if that be not ready, he looks as surly as a Butcher's Dog, or as the Butcher himself, who is the rudest Beast of the two! His Company I shall never fail of, than one or two of your Worships will come to Visit me, three or four times a day and make me as uneasy as this Sir Booby that Arrests me will be when he hears I'm gone over to the Kings-Bench;— No Sir; I am bound for the Compter; there I'll treat my fellow Prisoners, that want a Bottle of Wine and a lusty Joint of Meat! 'Twill be well bestowed.  
How long is it since you have had so good knowledge of these Houses you have described? (said Marwoud) I hope you never were confined till now. I never was indeed (replied Polydor.) But I have visited some of my acquaintance in such like places several times. Well Sir since you are so obstinate, and will not be prevailed on for your own good; (said one of the Sergeants) you shall even have your humour, but I fear you'll repent it. I shall not however acquaint you with my Penitence if I do, (answered Polydore,) So, let's know what's to pay; that I may be gone to my Palace. Dear Friend (continued he, speaking to Marwoud) oblige me so far as to inquire into this business for me; and see what must be done in't, and give yourself a little farther trouble to send Harry, Will, or Tom, any one of 'em or all of 'em together to me, by to Morrow Noon. I will not fail (replied Marwoud) Can I do you any better Service? I am sorry at the Heart that I must leave you: Yet if my Company may add any thing to your satisfaction, command my stay with you as long as you please, and where you will; I'll put off all business so I may any way contribute to the easing of your Misfortunes. O by no means (answered Polydore again, Embracing his Evil Angel) I cannot suffer it. I know you will be at no great ease in such a place, which will but increase my trouble.  
As they had ended this Discourse, the Drawer brought up a Bill of about eight and twenty Shillings which these Vermin had devoured in less than three hours' time, and yet the Dogs were so greedy that they were craving still; they were for Money for waiting! (with so many Plagues to them as they drank Glasses of Wine!) Money for waiting! (cry d Polydor) yes; let them pay you that set you a-work. They looked a little sour; but said no more, because they saw their Paymaster in the Room; who would needs pay the Reckoning out of the extraordinary satisfaction he received in Polydor's Affliction: But Marwoud pretended, it was for fear Polydore should have occasion for Money, in his ill Circumstances.  
Polydor took leave of him to go to his Enchanted Castle, with a Resolution worthy an Hero who makes such desperate Adventures! He was attended only by four of the Giants Warders. The other two stayed with Marwoud till they had squeezed three Guinneys out of him. He charged them when he was going to look strictly to their Prisoner and not to allow him any liberty, that they might lawfully deny him. They promised to be very observant of his Commands, and left him to go homewards without his Companion; for my part, I wish Polydore had gone homeward without him, and had left him to keep his Bed warm in the Compter! But hang't! 'Tis ridiculous to wish Impossibilities! Well! Let the Treacherous Marwoued even trudge on! we'll return to my good friend Polydore; who by this time had entered the Fort and paid all Duties belonging to it.  
All the rest of the poor Enchanted Souls looked upon him, as the wretched Ghosts in Hell did on Hercules and Theseus whom they were in hopes came to deliver 'em; and truly if Polydore did not altogether enlarge their Bodies, yet he did much increase their Commons, during his stay there. Insomuch, that they all esteemed him their Deliverer from a lingering sort of Famine! For he daily gave Alms to the meanest: You may see Providence in this now! For had he not been sent thither, many a poor Soul might have Perished of Hunger and Thirst.  
His Charity to all, and his kind easy Conversation with the most inferior and Miserable Creature there was so signal, that the Keepers took particular notice of it, and told him, after he had been there two Days and some Hours, by way of Compliment as I suppose they intended it; that, They should be mighty sorry to lose his Company; at least (they added) the Prisoners would have no small cause to Lament his Departure, though they ought to wish it for his sake. He Smiled, and told 'em, ' He thought he was obliged to it as he was a Man, if not as a Christian and a Fellow Sufferer.  
They had more discourse as they walked, at the end of which, a Jolly, Honest Soul, (and so you would judge by the Ruddy Complexion of his Face) one who had no small Authority there, Invited him into the Lodge; telling him, and that truly, that it was the sweeter place of the two. He Embraced his kind proffer; and to show he was not ungrateful for favours sent for half a dozen Bottles of good Claret from Matt. Fowlers, and bespoke two good substantial Dishes of Meat for his Friend, his self and the Prisoners.  
As they were drinking a Glass or two before Dinner; in came those two Officers that stayed behind with Marwoud, who had heard of his Generosity to those in the House, and of his Civility to every Body, and who perceived he had Money enough; O (cried Polydore, looking on his Friend in Authority.) These are some of the Gentlemen that brought me hither to be acquainted with you. Sirs! Pray walk in and drink with us (continued he, to the Officers) They were easily prevailed on, and sat 'em down:  
After a Glass or two had gone about; (said the Sergeant) I wonder, Sir, No body has been with you yet! Ay (said Polydor) 'tis something strange! But I doubt not, my Friend whom you saw with me t'other day, is busy in getting my Liberty; and means I suppose, to surprise me with it; yet I admire he has not sent some other Friends to me whom I expected to see here the next day after my Confinement. You have been very patiented, Sir, (said the Officer) I don't hear that you have sent to any Friend yet. No, no, I need not trouble myself, I'm sure (replied Polydor) my Friend is labouring for my ease. You mean Squire Marwoud, (answered the Sergeant.) I do so (said Polydor.) I can then assure you (continued the Officers) that he is endeavouring, labouring all the ways imaginable to keep you in a Prison all the days of your Life. How Sir (Interrupted Polydore, strangely Surprised!) what, do you know what you say! Ay, ay, Sir, (said the other Sergeant) and I'll swear it, Sir; and two Witnesses are enough to cast a Suit at Common Law. That may be Sir, (answered Polydor) but a thousand Witnesses will hardly make me suspect my Friend. But pray, what ground have you for what you say? Why, Sir (replied one of 'em) since we have found you here among us a Civil, Obliging, and Charitable Person; I'll tell you the whole truth, which I will Swear to, and so will my Friend there. Be assured then, that it was he who set you for three days together, till the very day he secured you in the Coach where we took you. I dare swear it before any Magistrate in England, (Interrupted t'other Sergeant.) ●t may be so Sir, (replied Polydor.) Besides (pursued the Sergeant) I'm sure we had three Guinneys of him. If this be true; (cried Polydor) I am a very unfortunate Fellow, indeed! For, the loss of a Friend grieves me a thousand times more than my Imprisonment. But (continued he) did he say, I owed him any Money? No Sir (replied the Sergeant) he told us, the Debt was real, and Contracted by a Lady whom you had lately Married. This is all a Riddle to me! said Polydor, But I thank you Gentlemen for your Information. I find I am made the sport of Fortune of late. I was a happy Fellow and at Liberty once.— But now— Well!— Gentlemen, your Servant.— I thank you for this Liberty.— Why Sir, will you be going already, (said he who Invited him into the Lodge) Dinner is just a coming I believe, by this time. Be pleased then Gentlemen (replied Polydor) to feed hearty when it does come; and Invite some of your Friends in the House to eat with you, that want it most, at least be pleased to send 'em what you think fit, for my part, I care not for eating. I must mind my own business I see. And pray let me entreat the favour of you, to let me have a careful Messenger sent to me; and you shall command me as much another time, if I ever am in a Capacity of serving you. Ay Sir, we'll be sure to send you a very honest Fellow (answered one of 'em) but we are sorry you will not Dine, when you have already given order for Meat. I thank you Sir (said Polydor) I have business of greater concern than Dining, once more your Servant.  
The Gate was soon opened to him, you may believe; and to his dark Apartment he went directly. Where after two or three hearty Sighs; he began. How should Marwoud come acquainted with my Ariadne! How came she to employ him! And how durst he undertake so base a thing as to betray his Friend! Yet— what made him fight me for the Ring and the Gold! What Title had he to either of 'em. 'Tis a strange Mystery, profound and dark! And I am lost in't. He must know my False Ariadne, if he did really betray me to this place, that's certain, Ariadne did I call her? A very Improper Name it is (methinks) for her: For,— she has led me into a Labyrinth! I see, all Ariadne's are not of the same humour. Her Name sake bravely led her Lover forth, spite of a Cruel Father! Ventured all, and lost herself at last for a false Man! When I Disarmed and naked of deceit, have got into the Labyrinth, and met the Monster. So much for Honesty! So much for Truth! But O! How much for rash Credulity! Had I been practised in the World's great Arts, Treason, Rebellion, and Hypocrisy. could I have nosed my Prince, and to his Teeth have told him that his Power was but painted; could I have sworn a Maid into belief, of any feigned Love, and when I had enjoyed, have thrown the Rifled, Broad, Blown Flower behind me; could I, in my Dear Friend's Bosom lying, pierce it to reach his Heart; and after all, cheat Heaven with pretended Piety, serve God with lift up Eyes and dismal tone; but Heart of Marble, sinking down to Hell, than I had been a Glorious Devil! Then, my Prince might ha' been pitied, the lost Maid have Fruitless Tears with my Friends unrevenged Blood. They'd only suffered.— O! No; I mistake: They had been Blessed (perhaps) and with their Sighs have blasted all my hopes of future Bliss, and blown me down to Hell; for Heaven sees, and is not to be mocked.  
He fetched another deep Sigh at the end of this long Sermon, and threw himself on his Bed: Within a little after the Fellow came to him to know what Service he had to command him. He rose and dispatched him away to his three Gaming Friends; and being then somewhat tired with Grief, and not having yet slept well in his new Lodging, he fell into a slumber for two or three hours.  
About which time the Messenger returned with his three Friends. He was almost out o' Countenance when he saw 'em; and hardly knew how to receive 'em. At last (said Will,) Why, how now Polydore! What brought thee hither? Even my own Folly (replied Polydor) you will not pity me when you hear it. However, I must discourse it to you, that you may give me your Advice; you must know then, I'm Married.— Married (cried all three, in a strange Surprise) Ay, Married (continued Polydor) and to one of the most Beautiful Creatures breathing! One whom I would not leave for the Empire of the World, were she but really what she seemed. You appear Amazed at what I say (pursued he) but sit ye down and I will relate you the whole Adventure; 'Tis pure Knight Errantry, that you must take notice of before hand. Then he began and told 'em every Circumstance till the very Minute that they came to him. They heard it with a great deal of Patience and Wonder, but with no little trouble for their Friend's sake. I'm sorry (said Will,) you are fallen into the hands of Sir Tenacious Heedy, I have heard he's a mere Jew to any Man that owes him Money. No, Pox on't! (cried Harry) Nothing troubles me but that he is Married. And what's worse (added Tom,) that he should throw himself away without ever so much as ask the advice of any of his Friends! You see Friend (said Harry) what comes of Weddings! Pox take me, if I can pity you for the heart of me. Why were there not Wives enough in the Town of other men's but you must needs get one of your own! And (added Will,) to believe a little Rascally Lad in a matter of such moment! A likely piece of business indeed, (cried Harry) that a Lady of twelve hundred a Year and some thousands in Money and Jewels, should dispose of herself on such a Person as thine! There had been some reason; had some probability, that I might have had such Fortune: I might justly expect it. Yes, from such a Lady as Sycorax in the Tempest, with a Dowry of Enchanted Lands (cried Tom) which you may take Possession of when you can discern 'em.— No, Faith, (continued he) to give the Devil his due, Polydore has the advantage of us all, that way. Ay, (replied Harry) and to give the Devil his due, he's the silly'st Devil that ever I heard of! Come! You are Merry Gentlemen at my Cost, (interrupted Polydor) but this is nothing to my Liberty, this is no Advice; tho 'tis what I did really expect from you. Advice, (cried Harry) why prithee send for thy Wife Ariadne with her Clue, if thou knowst whither. I believe she's gone to my Sycorax, for their Lands lie very near together. No, no, (interrupted Tom) I rather imag n Bacchus has taken her up too, into Heaven; he's an old Dog at Ariadne's! You shall see he'll fetch Sir Francis' Sister and all, shortly. Enough, enough of this! (cried Will, very soberly) Let's think what's to be done. Why; I'll tell you my opinion (replied Harry) I know a rich old Widow about threescore, I'll send her to him, if he'll Marry her; so as Marrying brought him in, let it even fetch him out. Very seasonable and wholesome Advice i' gad! (cried Tom) And then, 'tis but leaving her assoon as he gets out, as Ariadne has left him, and he may thus be quits with Fortune. YE are very pretty Fellows truly (said Polydor) But— It may fall to my share to laugh at you, yet e'er I die. Ay, if your Spouse should prove a right Diamond and no Counterfeit, (replied Harry) you might laugh at us for laughing at you. In the mean time case your Sp●●en the other way, if you can, 'twill become you better. Come dear heart (said Will to Polydore) Take no notice of these two Rascals!— I'll do what lies in my Power to serve thee, upon my Soul! Polydor thanked him very obligingly. Hark O! what Gravity! (cried Harry) As if it were not possible that we might be as ready to serve him with our Lives and Fortunes as your Worship; because you talk and look so superciliously, and we so freely! Well said Harry! (cried Tom) What Does the Rogue affront us! Away, ye Brace of Coxcombs! (replied Will.) I don't accuse ye of any Averseness to his Service. But, methinks, you should have pleased yourselves sufficiently with your raillery on him, by this time. Prithee, let's now be serious. Nay, for my part (answered Harry) I can be as serious as a Pickpocket at his business in a Church. And I (said Tom) can be as serious as the Person! Well! And what's to be done now? I think it the best way (repl●●d Will,) to remove him to the Fl●● No (interrupted Polydor) I'll rather remove to the Kings-bench, I have some acquaintance there already, besides I have drank some Bottles with the Marshal, who, I am confident, will give 〈◊〉 all the Liberty 〈◊〉 may with safety. I'll be sure to Visit you every day in Term time at least. And we'll make thee as welcome as we can, (cried Harry;) that is, thou shalt never go over the Water sober. Hang your Dutch Entertainments! (said Polydor) I'm out of conceit of 'em. A Blessed Reformation, if it hold! (said Tom.) It shall Sir (replied Polydore.)  
They had some farther discourse concerning the means of getting him over, which lasted about a quarter of an hour more, than they sent for half a dozen Bottles of Claret to the old House, and a dish of cold Chickens. By that time Polydor's Stomach was come to him. For, if ever you were a Prisoner, you may be sensible the sight of a Friend or two there, revives a Man strangely! He eat as hearty as he did on his Wedding day: And drank off his three Bumpers as he used to do, to the King, the Queen, and the Duke.  
They stayed with him till the Fatal Bell was rung, which commands every Prisoner close to his Chamber, and all others abroad to their business. Here you might see one lugging two Guns (as they call 'em) which in plain English are two Pottle-Pots of Ale and Beer, another following him with some Tobacco, a Candle and Pipes. There a poor Soul with two or three Bottles of the Sheriff's Wine, Anglicè Fair Water; begging of another to fill his dirty Pipe with stinking Mundungus.  
I suppose, the miserable Wretch was one of the Common-side. You may believe me, for I have lain in the House some Nights myself to my Sorrow; Nor is it any great matter of wonder, for a Man of my Circumstances to have been a Prisoner: You know we are generally special Poor. Well! There were a great many other Objects of Pity besides this Man, that a Curious Person would have taken notice on. But Polydor's Friends were none of that sort, for they went out assoon as they could persuade the Turnkey to open the Door. Polydor returned to his Chamber, and very contentedly went to Bed, where he slept sound; for he had drank his share with his Friends.  
Next Morning, he found himself in very good temper, and withal something inclinable to Rhyming. Whereupon he set Pen to Paper and made,  

An Attempt, in Pindaric, On the Blessings of Adversity.  

I.  
THE Just and Brave unmoved appear,  
In Storms where meaner Souls do shrink,  
And even beneath themselves do sink;  
Unable Miseries lest weight to bear!  
Or, if with Wealth and Honour Crowned,  
No room within their narrow Heart is found,  
To entertain the Blust'ring Guest;  
But swelling with the Bubble strait they burst!  
They in Adverse or Prosperous Fate alike are Cursed!  
When, the great Soul does scarce admit  
The Fawning Parasite:  
Or, if he does; 'tis locked within his Breast:  
Nor suffers him to play his part,  
Within the Cabinet of his Heart,  
But slighted, in the Ante-Chamber let's him sit.  
An equal mind in different Fates he bears:  
The one he neither Courts, nor t'other fears;  
Nor is with this puffed up, nor that depressed:  
But in himself alone is ever Blessed.   

II.  
Ambition, Anger, Avarice and Lust,  
With other Passions of the Mind,  
The Generous Soul in Reason's Chain does bind;  
And as his Captives at his Feet does thrust,  
Tho Fierce and Great to Slavery does bring;  
Here Nero's Tyrant lis and Alexander's King!  
When the base Wretch is his Slaves, Slave;  
Which, like a Conquering Prince, does brave  
The reason Heaven to defend him gave:  
It's Throne Usurps, and does affect to Reign,  
Lord of the strongest Castles, both the Heart and Brain!  
And now grows Insolent and Lewd:  
Revels, and mingles with the purest of his Blood!  
Does his best Faculties control;  
And would debauch his chaster Soul!  
At least misleads it for a Space;  
Then leaves it naked to disgrace!  
The Man who thus is by his Passions swayed,  
O'er Beasts should wish to Rule, never to be obeyed!   

III.  
Blessed is the Man whom Heaven does not try,  
With guilded Apples of Prosperity;  
Sweet to the Taste and Beauteous to the Eye,  
But Rotten at the Coat and Poison to the Heart!  
But thrice blessed he who can reject  
The proffered Pleasure of the Bait;  
Who sees the future dire effect,  
If overcome by the Deceit.  
Losing the Pleasure he avoids the deadly Smart!  
But thrice and four times Blessed is he  
Whom Heaven try's with Misery,  
And hardly  with Rags of Poverty!  
Who silently does bear his Fate  
And is contented in his lowest State.  
Inur'd to Grief and sad Mischance,  
Surely, though slow towered Heaven he does advance  
Treading on Thorns the way to Bliss!  
Adversity the greatest Blessing is!  
And nothing than Prosperity is worse!  
Prosperity ill-used, the greatest Curse.   

iv  
Job's Tempter, sure, mistook the way,  
Job's Virtue to betray!  
Or, rather, the All-Merciful denied  
That his Beloved Servant should be tried  
By heaping Riches, so to teach him Pride.  
Hardened in Grief and Plagues his Virtue grew;  
Steeled it became, Temptation-Proof it was!  
The deadlyest Darts which on him Satan threw,  
His Body pierced, but could no farther pass.  
His Patience to his Tempter gave more Pain,  
Than all Job did sustain!  
And he was Plagued, and he was shot in vain!  
When (Lo!) Th' Almighty from Above,  
With Eyes with Pity flowing and with Love,  
Beheld the Afflicted Man, as weak he lay,  
Buried in Ashes on the Ground:  
Vouch'dsafe to Parley with this thing of Clay!  
Taught him to know himself and made him sound.  
And for the Miseries which he had shared,  
Gave him a  Reward.  
Teach me then, Heaven, to withstand  
The heaviest stroke of Sorrows hand!  
That, to myself brought home, I may  
The Obedience which I own thee ever pay!    
He had scarce made an end before an under-Officer of the House came to tell him there was a Gentleman and a Lady below that would speak with him. He was not a little Surprised at it, not imagining what Lady should come to give him a Visit in such a place, unless it were his own Sister. However he bid the Fellow lead them up. He did so. And Polydore then was much more amazed than before, when he saw his own false Ariadne, as he thought her, led in by Marwoud the Treacherous. They stood staring on one another a pretty while, e'er either of 'em could speak. But Polydore was in a strange Perplexity! You would have thought he had been in a Fever by his Face; he would fain have been angry and have railed at her, but when he beheld her Beauty, he was no more able to do't, than I am to fight a Whale in the water! And that is not very probable; for I can Swim no more than a Millstone:  
Heavens! (cried Polydore, pulling his Hat over his Eyes, and walking from her in a great deal of haste) Art thou come now thyself to torment me! Barbarous Woman! Go! Take that Treacherous Man into thy deceitful Bosom, make as much of him as your false Heart will give you leave. And thou Marwoued, Faithless Man! Embrace, Embrace the Siren! Go together! And betray one another into a groundless and vain Opinion of each others mutual Affection! Shameless Man (continued he, looking fiercely on Marwoud) what unheard of Impudence has brought thee into my sight, after thou hast thus betrayed me! But what ill things dare not he do, that durst betray his Friend! Why, this is very strange (Interrupted Marwoud) what do you mean, Polydor? I mean to Cudgel thee (replied Polydore, all in a Rage) for thou art not worthy of my Sword! O! fie! (interrupted Ariadne) Is it thus you Treat your Friends. Peace, Siren! Hypocrite! Fair Devil! Peace! (cried Polydor) Thy Breath and Looks are Infectious! Good Heaven! (said Ariadne weeping) How have I deserved this! Ah Crocodile! (cried Polydore, with an angry Smile) I confess thou hast not deserved that I should speak to thee! But— admire now the sweetness of my Temper! That I can vouchsafe to tell thee I am angry with thee: And that I have much reason to hate thee: O! Would I could! On what Errand has Hell sent thee to me now? Or, rather what greater Affliction is Heaven yet pleased to try me with!— Come! I'll be tame. And gently will confess thy Power to thee. Wert thou but half so Virtuous as Fair; and I a thousand times more Rich and Happy, than now I am miserable: I'd kneel to get one Smile of thee. But— thou art— Hold! (interrupted Ariadne) And hear my Business first;  you proceed to Judgement of me! I come to offer you all that I have; and were it Twenty Thousand times more, I would lay it all at your Feet; I have brought this Gentleman, my Friend; who (it seems) has been long your Friend, however you are willing to mistake him now; him I have engaged to Compound the Debt with Sir Tenacious, and if he will not accept of our Propositions; he has procured another Gentleman his Friend to Bail you with him. She tells you truth Polydore (said Marwoud) though your Passion blinds, and will not let you see our kind Intentions to serve you. And is it really true? (cried Polydor) ' Most certain, (replied Ariadne.) Then Damn ye, Damn ye both, (cried Polydore, furiously) What! Purchase my Liberty with the Prostitution of your Body! I tell ye, though you both consulted to get me into this place; yet I'll make a shift to get out on't, without your Aid, Advice, or Money. And for thy part Marwoud (continued he) expect I will thank thee most justly for thy Industry in delivering me into the hands of these People; who yet have used me more civilly than thou desired'st I should have been.  
He then told him what he had heard from the Officers; while the other laboured with all the Cunning he had, to persuade him, that he was abused by them, in that Discourse: But all to no purpose. Nay (said Polydor) 'tis in vain to hope I should believe thee true to me now; when thy very acquaintance with this Woman Loudly Proclaims thy Gild.  
While they were arguing thus very hotly; Ariadne took up the Verses and slipped 'em into her Pocket. At last they grew loud; and than Polydore taking Ariadne by the hand, led her civilly out of the Room; but Marwoud he almost threw down Stairs; and immediately shut the Door to him.  
Ariadne begged of him with all the earnestness that might be, to open the Door to her; urging that she had something to discover to him that concerned the whole Quiet of his Life; but all in vain! He bid her be gone and come no more near him. She still pressed to come in, and I believe would have made up all Differences had she prevailed; for she was really very sensible that she had been to blame, in treating him thus so long. But being still denied entrance, she went away with a Resolution to play him yet one other Trick  she undeceived him.  
Marwoud was much out of humour, and in a great heat with Polydore, for folling him so basely before his Mistress; but he considered, there was no Sword to be drawn there; and besides, his happy Rival was then Naked whi●h stopped the effects of his Indignation, for a time: Yet he could not forbear threatening him with Revenge, and that in the hearing of Ariadne. Who told him, he need study no greater Revenge than what he had already; or at least, than what he was like to have by her means.  
This pretty well appeased the affronted Squire; and he waited on her home without so much as ever threatening Polydore again.  
Polydor, was a little disturbed at this unseasonable Visit; because (perhaps) since the Fit had just seized him, he designed to have gone on Rhyming, which their unexpected and unwished for Company prevented. Being therefore somewhat discomposed, he went to his Friend in the Lodge and desired to drink a Glass of Wine with him; which was presently permitted him; and they Dined together very plentifully and cheerfully.  
About 5. a Clock, as he was Drinking a Grace Cup, he was told that there was a Lady in a Coach at the Gate who asked for him, and the officious Messenger had hardly said the word,  he saw Dorothea come in, whom he had all along mistaken for Sir Francis' Sister Ariadne. She was attended by two Footmen, one of which was Polydor's fellow-Travellor, to St. Alban's.  
He was mightily surprised at the sight of her; and could not but conclude now, that she was in earnest, and had a real Passion for him.  
He led her up to his da ksom Apartment, where he began to express the sense he had of the House, and Obligation she then did him in that Visit. She told him he mistook, for the kindness was to herself only, and that she was come with a full firm Resolution to know what he refused to tell her, some Days past.  
But (Madam, interrupted he.) First, I beseech you let me know how you found me out here. Marwoud, with much entreaty informed me (said she.) But had he known that I intended you a Visit, and upon what account, I dare believe a hundred Guinneys would not have tempted him to the Discovery. For, in short (I'll be free with you, though you are so unjustly strange to me) he loves me; at least I am confident he has a great Passion for my Money and Estate. The Devil's in him for Ariadne's! (interrupted Polydor.) She seemed to take no notice of what he said but went on. Yet let his Pretences (continued she) be never so generous or so self-interessed I could never love him, much less since I have had the misfortune to see you, who so obstinately deny me the least place in your kind thoughts. Madam, (replied Polydor) I beg of you for Mercy's sake do not do me so great an Injustice, as to believe what you have said. Heaven knows, if it were possible; I would Sacrifice my Heart and all to the Service of Sir Francis Heartwel 's Sister. This is mere Evasion (cried Dorothea,) I cannot apprehend what should hinder but your own Inclination, and unless you will let me know the Obstacle, I shall die in that Opinion.  
Since then, Madam (said Polydor.) you press me so closely to it, I dare not deny you that satisfaction; but I must conjure you by whatsoever has the dearest Influence on you, that you will be secret: I promise it, (cried she) as I hope for any Happiness in your Love.  
He kissed her Hand upon it: And told her of his Marriage with Ariadne, the Circumstances and all the Misfortunes that were Consequences of it.  
She all the time seemed the most troubled Creature that ever was: Sometimes she Sighed, then held her Handkerchief to her Eyes, till she had made 'em look as if they had been so red with Weeping; then she would turn them Amorously on his, and there hold 'em for a considerable time; then at last, with another piteous Sigh fetched from the very bottom of her Lungs, she'd fix 'em Languishingly on the Ground. And twenty other little Arts she practised, (which you know, pretty Ladies are very expert in,) to make him believe how much concerned she was at the loss of him.  
I will not say positively, that she did really Weep; but I am apt to think she might: For, Women (they say) have an excellent Talon that way! Now for my part, I wonder at it! Since, I swear to you, I can't shed a Tear an I were to Hang for want of a Tear, unless I cut Onions (which is a thing I seldom do) or take fine Spanish Snush; and that brings the Rheum partly thro' my Eyes, (which truly I like as well as Sneezing, every whit. It clears my Head and does me as much kindness as I expect from it, but these means you'll say, are too visible to be mistaken for the effects of any Passion. But after all, if I were to cry for my Life; I would go to hear a Comedy or two, that I know.  
The Doleful Tale being over at last; after some little silence on both sides; Dorothea began to lament afresh the loss of the only Man whom, as she pretended, she could Love; and the more to aggravate his Misery; She told him her design in coming then to him, was absolutely to know his last Determination, whether he could Love her as a Wife or no? And to have paid his Debt within a Weeks time, if he had Married her; nay, farther, her extravagant Passion carried her! She offered yet to make him her Husband, and to retire with him to any other part of the Christian World. He could not forbear kissing her Hand again and again, for so prodigious a kind Proposition: But he declined it as modestly as 'twas possible any Man should. He let her see how destructive it would be to her Reputation, how fatal to her Quiet, after a few Months when the Excess of her Passion was allayed. Nay, and added very honestly, that it was not improbable that he should grow sick of a Wife that had so far lost all that was valuable in this World; and then they would both prove most miserable.  
But Madam (continued he) I am very Confident that this is but a trial of my Humour, and if I had accepted your offer, you would only have mocked my easiness in believing your Virtue so weak and unguarded. You may think (said she) as advantageously of me and my Virtue as you please; but assure yourself, I doubt my Love would Sacrifice all to you. But— In the name of good Fortune (pursued she) what happiness can you propose to yourself with your Ariadne! The greatest I could wish (replied he) were she yet but Virtuous. But (perhaps, said Dorothea) in that you suppose Impossibilities. However Madam (answered Polydor) I'll hope the best. Well! (said Dorothea) I see you are deaf to the news of a better Life, and so I leave you: But with all the discontent imaginable, on my part: Saying so, she arose from her Seat.  
Polydor who had forgotten it all this while, now at last bethought him, that (happily) she might have talked herself thirsty; begged of her to accept of one Glass of Wine, and left her in haste without expecting her answer, to send for it. Mean while she took a Paper out of her Pocket, which she conveyed under his Gloves:  
When he returned, she told him, she neither could nor would stay to drink with him, for whom she had lost herself; and in a seeming kind of a Pet, fling out of the Room: He followed her, and taking her hand led her to the Gate, all the way begging her to consider it as it was, his Misfortune, not his Fault. She said no more, than 'twas in his Power yet to make his Fortune good or bad, and therefore she concluded it was his fault. He took his leave very submissively of her at the inmost Gate, looking on her with a very Penitential Face, which (may be) he put on, merely to please her.  
When she was gone, he went to his Melancholy Retreat. Where he reflected on the strange Perverseness of his Fortune; to cheat him thus with a false Counterfeit Ariadne of a true one; for it was passed all doubt with him, that the Lady who just left him was Sir Francis Heartwel's Sister and the Real Ariadne: So many Circumstances there were to confirm him in that Opinion, there was the Livery and the Coach which was near enough to be known to him for Sir Francis', and what was greater than all that! He was certain that one of 'em was really Footman to the Knight.  
These and such like Thoughts kept him in his Chamber for about half an Hour: When, taking up his Gloves to walk down to give his Fellow-Sufferers a Visit; he saw the Paper Dorothea had left there.  
'Twas Superscribed, to Polydor the Credulous. By way of Imitation of his Blessings of Adversity.  
THE Fool and Easy soon are lost  
In Snares which careful Men avoid,  
Or, which their Arts have soon destroyed;  
Too subtle to be made the Coz'ners' Boast!  
Tho Love, or Money be the Bait,  
Their Heart excludes the guilded, gay deceit;  
No room is for the Shadow found:  
But safe in their own Policies they rest.  
They in a Prosperous World, or Adverse Fate are Blest;  
When the kind Soul does straight admit,  
Each fawing Parasite!  
Takes him into his Bosom from the ground  
Nay, suffers him to play his part,  
Even in the inmost of his Heart;  
And in the highest Throne Triumphing lets him sit!  
A Faith like wax to every one he lends,  
Which a soft Word soon melts or a Smile bends,  
Takes the Impression of a Judas-Kiss,  
As deep, as the kind stamp of Faithfulness!  
I think there was a Mock to every Stanza; but on my Word I have forgotten 'em. Polydor was amazed at the Reading 'em, nor could he imagine how ●hey came there. 'Twas a Woman's Hand he concluded, but 'twas a Hand ●oo he had never been acquainted with! ●he had traced him in his serious stuff so exactly, that he could not but Laugh hearty at it!  
He put them up very carefully and went on with his Charitable Design of Visiting some poor Gentlemen in the House that had wanted him for some hours, he was very pleasant with them till Bed time. When he went to sleep till about Six the next Morning. I don't hear that he complained much of his misfortune that Night.  
In the Morning about Eleven a Clock, came Harry and Tom to see him: And brought him news that on the Morrow in the Afternoon, his Habeas Corpus would be ready, and he might hope to see St. George's Church before Night.  
He was well enough pleased with their diligence in his business, but he wanted his third Friend Will. O (cried Harry) he'll be here time enough to rob us of the best part of our Dinner. We have bespoke three Dishes at Fowlers, against two a Clock, and the Wine I suppose will be here within a quarter of an hour. He had scarce spoken e'er it was brought. They got once more the freedom of the Lodge for their Imprisoned Friend; where they Dined assoon as Will came; which was precisely at two, as near as I can remember. They were mighty pleasant all the time and so we will leave 'em; to hear what was done all this while at Sir Francis'.  
There had been (it seems) a strange Catastrophe, for Dorothea and Miranda had now at last prevailed on Ariadne to leave off Tormenting her Polydor and rest satisfied with his good qualities after so many cruel Experiments she had made on him. What most invited her to be at last Civil to him, was the declaration of his Love for her which he made to Dorothea, supposing, she might not have quite lost her Virtue.  
Well! (said Ariadne) I consent to undeceive my Enchanted Squire, on Condition you'll suffer me to discover your Inclinations; yours Miranda first to my Brother, and yours Dorothea to Marwoud: Think not (pursued she not permitting them to reply) that I ask this of ye as a favour too, no I have already resolved on it; and as Good Fortune will have it, see here they both come.— Come Brother (continued she) pray sit and Oblige Mr. Marwoud to sit with us: We must Consult, here is much business to be done, and that very suddenly. Nay; if I can serve you Madam; (replied Marwoud) you need but instruct me, and conclude affirmatively of my absolute Obedience. You promise largely and nobly (replied Ariadne) but I fear you will repent of your Obligation: Tho in my Opinion you have rather cause to be satisfied with it. And, not to hold you any longer in suspense, know 'twas with my consent and the best of my Affections and Endeavours that I Married Polydore; and you have only been my Instrument in trying his humour, which otherwise I could not have been so well acquainted with. Now, therefore (continued she) the Request or Command (which you please to call it) that I have to you; is to lay aside all Animosities to him and Pretensions to his Wife: Not that I mean to rob you of one Mistress and leave you absolutely destitute of an Object of Love; no; I shall rather make you too ample satisfaction for so inconsiderable a loss, when I dare promise you and offer you now the Heart of my Dear Dorothea, I expect no denial after the promise you have given me: 'tis partly an acknowledgement you ought to make me, for the opportunities I have shown you of gratifying your Revenge on your Friend and my Husband. In short, I design you shall be happy with her the same day that I am so with Polydor. Madam (said Marwoud) since you do really Love Polydore, and that there is now no longer any hope for me from your Circumstances, I can't propose greater felicity to myself than Dorothea's Love, if I could be assured on't. I will engage for it (answered Ariadne) Pray make your Addresses.  
They then fell into Cabals, Ariadne discoursing her Brother and Miranda. There she did Miranda the violence to discover the Passion she so long had entertained for Sir Francis, who was most pleasantly surprised with the Relation, and blamed his Sister that she had not revealed it before, that he might ha' Married assoon as she. Something she said to excuse it; but that is not very Material here.  
Marwoud was very well pleased with the Person and Humour of his new Mistress, but still he had a Reluctance or uneasiness in his thoughts for the loss of Ariadne's Fortunes: Dorothea was very well contented with his Humour, Person and Fortunes; for to say truth, she had loved him long, and could have accepted him with half his Estate.  
Ariadne having brought things to so good a Period at home, proposed the day following, to undeceive the poor desponding Polydor. In order to which, Sir Francis and Miranda, Marwo●d and Dorothea accompanied her to him. Ariadne desired to speak with him, and one of the Servants went to acquaint him that the Lady was at the Gate that came to visit Him with a Gentlewoman, three or four days past.  
Polydor bid the Fellow say he was busy, as indeed he was, for there were his three Friends who had brought his Habeas Corpus to remove him. The Messsenger returned for all that, and told him th●●●dy was to Impo●● that to b●●ny'd, that she must speak with him. Tell her she may (said Polydor) If she will take the pains to meet me three or four hours hence at the Golden Lion in Southwark. He did so, and returned once more to let Polydore know that Sir Francis Heartwell would see him if he pleased. Sir Francis Heartwell! (cried Polydor in a great surprise!) Thou mistakest sure. No Sir (replied the Servant) so he called himself, I am certain. D●● him, let him come in (said Harry) If he does affront thee, I shall find a time to cut his throat. I cannot blame thy zeal for thy friend (replied Polydor) though it be mistaken. He is a man of too much honour to offer any Rudeness. Saying so, he went as far as he might to wait on Sir Francis, who was just coming into the House with his Sister, Marwoud leading Miranda and Dorothea.  
After having saluted each other, Sir Francis desired Polydore to leave his friends to entertain one other for a quarter of an hour, that he might discourse him a little privately. Polydor spoke to 'em of it, and went into another Room with the two Gentlemen and the Ladies. Sir, (said the Knight, lifting up his Sister's hood, which till then covered her face) Do you not know this Lady? Too well Sir (Replied Polydor) you had not found me here, Sir, otherwise. Have you any pretensions to her? (said Sir Francis.) Pretensions, Sir (answered Polydor) no, no; and I would she never had had any for me! What's the meaning of this? (said the Knight;) To my knowledge she loves you. Do you know who she is? Yes, and what she is too, (replied Polydore;) she calls herself Ariadne; but the pretty Imposture will not pass for such in this Lady's Company. At these words, he took Dorothea's hand. 'Tis well (continued he) they are both come together. I hope my Ariadne will not any longer pretend to the blood of the Heartwells before you, Sir. Your Ariadne! (said Sir Francis) why, are you Married to either of 'em; Yes, yes, Sir Francis (cried he in a great Passion) To my eternal shame I am married to this false Beautiful creature; yes I am sped with her. Well Sir, (answered Ariadne's Brother) And Heaven give you joy with my Sister! Ah Sir (says Polydor) Do not triumph in the misfortunes of an unhappy Gentleman! I know you do but Impose now; for that Lady's your Sister, (said he bowing to Dorothea.) If you please Sir, (answered Marwoud) That Lady shall be my Wife before Noon yet, as late as ' 'tis. It shall only trouble me (replied Polidor) for the Lady's sake. Come, come, Polydor, (said his kind b●other in Law) pen your Eyes, view her well! Is not your Ariadne more like me than my Cousin Dorothea? for so is that Lady called who has hitherto only personated my Sister, the more to perplex you. Ah Polydore cried Ariadne) I bring thee now thy True and Faithful Ariadne. Let me embrace you together (said Sir Francis.) And now Polydore (cried Marwoud taking him by the hand) Let here all Picques and Feuds cease. I wish thee, and will not envy thee, all those joys thou art like to possess in that Lady; To whose Embraces and caresses I will at present leave you, to withdraw the Action that is against you; which I protest I do, with much more content than I laid it on. Ha! (cried Polydor) This is too much happiness for me in one day! To find my dear Ariadne true, to be reconciled to my friend whom I thought passed it, and to be so nearly allied to one whom I have always been ambitious of serving.  
Marwoud went out and discharged him of the Action and fees of the House, while the other two Ladies complemented him; and began to confess how they had all contributed to his seeming misfortunes. Heaven (cried Polydor) that I should not know that face again and that shape out of Breeches. But I am now awake. Yet (continued he) I must beg you would permit me to distrust your kindness to me before my friends, in the other Room: Be it as your humour Commands (answered Ariadne) But don't let the counterfeit last long.  
Marwoued now returned and brought news of Polydors' Liberty: who straight led 'em to his other Friend. After Compliments had passed, he called his three Friends aside, and told 'em how things had succeeded, but withal added, that he durst not yet trust their Kindness, where fore he entreated they would accompany him to Sir Francis', where he was going, and that he would plant 'em so near, that upon the least call they might come to his assistance if occasion were. They all promised to hazard their Lives and Fortunes in his Service.  
Polydor then taking some Money out of his Pocket to bestow on the poor wretches that wanted it, at the same time pulled out the mock to his Pindaric; and showed it to Dorothea, ask if she knew the hand. She answered, yes, 'twas her Cousin Ariadne's; who smiling, confessed that she had stolen his melancholy stuff with design to abuse it. He was not a little pleased with this Confession.  
As soon as every one had Distributed their Charities, they left the dismal place, and Polydor took Coach with Sir Francis, Ariadne, Miranda, Marwoued and Dorothea: But Harry, Will and Tom were forced to walk into Cheapside, where they likewise took a Hackney Coach, following Sir Francis' Coach, as close as they could. They came in time to their Journey's end: Where Polidor disposed of his three merry Boys in a very convenient Room, leaving 'em Wine enough to supply 'em till he had dispatched his affairs in the next Room. Where as soon as he came, he was amazed to see the Tables already spread, and all things in as much order as if it had been designed a week before! But this was not all the occasion of his surprise, for when his Brother in Law, and his dear Ariadne, led him into an Inner Room, he was there presented with all the Writings of her Estate, and a glorious sight of Rich Jewels, and of Gold and Silver, some in Bags and some loosely scattered about the Chest. This sight was not altogether ungrateful to Polydore, though he did not absolutely do at on Riches.  
Immediately after the show was over, Sir Francis was for calling for the Person whom he had provided to speak some fatal words, (as strong as any Witches Charm, I'm sure) to him and Marwoued, and the other two Ladies. But Polydore begged his three Friends might first be admitted; to which they agreed: and he gave the sign immediately for them to come in. Who no sooner heard it, but with all the Violence and Resolution imaginable, they rushed in with their Swords drawn. Ha! (cried Polydor) whence is this Rudeness! what do you mean Gentlemen! How now Polydore (said Harry) Have you forgot we came to your Rescue? Rather to Divorce me from the greatest happiness imaginable (replied he drawing his Sword, which Sir Francis and Marwoued did likewise) This is strange (said Will.) It is indeed (answered Polydor) very strange; that a man should betray himself into twelve hundred a year besides thousands in Money and Jewels, and throw himself away on so Beautiful a Creature as Ariadne. You (Harry) I confess might have expected it? but for such a person as mine. Death we are fooled then (cry d Tom) well we shall find a time (continued he offering to go.) Hold Gentlemen, pray be'nt angry (said Polydor) you must not go yet, till you have dined with us, and been Witnesses to a little Business that these two Gentlemen and Ladies have to dispatch, Come, Put up! Put up! We are all friends. Ay, Gentlemen (said Sir Francis) we must entreat your Company to day. Nay (added Marwoued) ye must be our Guests. Upon this they all put up; and were as good as so many Certificates to Miranda and Dorothea; that Ceremony ended, they eat and drank plentifully, had the Fiddles, Danced, and were wondrous Pleasant, so we'll leave 'em till night, when I suppose the three Hero's went to Bed with their Ladies; where we'll leave 'em to be more Happy, than I dare tell you they were.  
FINIS.