THE REPENTING SINNER Pardoned: BEING A Brief Relation of the Wicked Life, and Penitent Pious Death of James Wilson of Wolverhampton in Stafford-shire: who died February 21. 1668. Made public by such as were Ear and Eye Witnesses of the same; For a warning to such as live ungodly. Prov. 28.13. He that covereth his Sins shall not prosper, but who so confesseth and forsaketh them shall have mercy. LONDON, Printed for Nevil Simmons at the three Crowns at Holborn Conduit. 1669. The Repenting Sinner pardoned, etc. GOD hath several ways to convince the world of the Evil of Sin, and of the excellency, safety, and goodness of his holy ways. Amongst the rest, this is one (which sometimes the useth, in a place where sin is countenanced, and godliness decried, disowned, and reproached.) He maketh the mouths of the most vile (if any have been more vile than others) to prclaim before they die, with the greatest seriousness, and sin abhorrency, the odiousness of the sins they have lived in, and persuade with the most powerful persuasions all about them to loath and leave the same. And as seriously doth his goodness make them own the scorned at, and despised ways of godliness; and as earnestly persuade others to them; which the Lord doth as in mercy to the sinner himself: so also that such as have been Companions in the same impieties, may be warned by the mouth of their Leader, to renounce the sins they have lived in, and to follow him in repentance, as they followed him in sin: whilst the Penitent lives and warns his ungodly fellows with his own tongue; they seem to regard, and possibly may have some thoughts of returning to God; but when the Preacher of repentance hath his mouth shut up, and he is silent and cold in his grave, they let slip all thoughts of reformation, and begin afresh to pursue their lusts, and wear off the fears they had of God's Anger for sin, and leave their short loathing of their wicked ways; and as greedily return to their ways of folly as if they never had a call, or cause to leave them. It is undoubtedly the duty of all, but especially of those that abide in sin, and scorn at the ways and means of holiness, to regard the warnings they have from the mouths of their Companions, who have tasted of the sweetness of sin & have known the best of it, and at a dying hour, when they should be wisest have declared their Judgement concerning the ways of sin and the ways of God. And it is the concernment of every living man, to remember and to lay to heart the Counsels of dying men, and the conclusion of their time and life, especially of such as have been visible, open, known and noted for the common vices and faults of mankind, and have the grace given them of the Lord to see the evil thereof. The sense of our duty herein, hath occasioned this ensuing Narrative. IN Wolverhampton in Stafford-shire, there dwelled a young man, a Widow's Son, whose Father and Grandfather had owned, and walked in the ways of God, and left many Prayers on record for their posterity. His Name was James Wilson, about twenty four years of age; one that had degenerated from the ways of his forefathers, and spent his time in fulfilling the lusts of his flesh, following the sins of Drunkenness, Sabbath-breaking, Swearing, and all manner of debauchery. He delighted not in following his Calling diligently, but was given to Cocking, and Company-keeping; he was a scorner at godliness, and a Jeerer at those that served God, and a reproacher of his Sister, and such as desired to fear the Lord and serve him; He was very froward and illnatured, cross and dogged to those in the Family, and led them very uncomfortable lives; but he was very courteous and pleasing to strangers, and to the Neighbours; that his Companions much delighted in him, and were glad of his Company when he was sober. In these profane ways he lived, seldom coming to the public worship of God, or minding the service of God in private, though he could read if he pleased: but his heart was hardened against God and godliness. Upon the 14. day of February 1668. he was according to his usual manner, vainly passing away the day of the Lord in folly and vanity, without any sense of God upon him, or regard of the Life to come. In the beginning of the Week he was sent to Stafford Fair, where he was very wet and waded coming home; but he came home on the Wednesday night; on the Thursday, his friends perceived some trouble upon him, he went to the Shop where he wrought, and told them there, that he was a dead man, and bade them farewell: He came home again and told his friends that he thought he should not live, but they believed him not. He passed that day very seriously, and seemed to have much affliction on his Spirit; and the assurance he had on his heart of death approaching, made him restless. On the Friday morning some of our godly Neighbours came in, and fell into discourse with him about eternal things and the Judgement Day to come, and minding him of a passage they had heard in a Sermon preached on the Lord's day, by an ejected Minister in that Town. How terrible a thing it was to a wicked man to arise and come to Judgement; and how comfortable it would be to the righteous, who should be as bold as a Lion: then he began to weep and shake his head, and was woefully disturbed at their discourse. And when his Neighbour's w●● away he earnestly desired their Prayers, and he cast himself upon his bed most part of that day in a restless condition: on Saturday morning his bedfellow arose and lighted him a Candle, and to him he began to impart his trouble; and told him he had been a great sinner, and would fain have Christians to pray for him; and also he said he had been in Prayer to God for mercy the most part of that Night (now he begns to pray) and also he desired his Sister to arise and make him a fire, and reach him a Bible, and she did gladly. Who as soon as he had the Bible, he fell a reading and a crying: And so he read & wept, and wept and read till morning. Sometime he would read a good while, and then lay down the Bible and weep most bitterly, and could read no more a while. When it was daylight he lay on his bed with much affliction and horror for his sin upon him, all the morning. At last household hold in his Sin no longer, but opened his mind to his Sister; and said, Oh my dear Sister! what a grievous wicked sinner have I been, Oh! I have been as wicked a drunken swearing Rogue as ever lived, the earth never bore so vile a wretch. Oh Sister, is there any mercy for me? She told him, that if he did now repent from the bottom of his heart for his Sin, there was hope. He fell a weeping grievously, and said, that he did repent from the very bottom of his heart; Oh said he, do you think that I dare dissemble with God now, now I am so near death and another world, and many words to that purpose; and shaking his head, and looking on his Sister with a dreadful eye, earnestly said, That for all manner of Roguery he was as wicked a man as ever lived; and said that no sin came amiss to him when he was drunk, and he had been so mad when he was drunk, that he did not fear all the Devils in Hell, he cared not what he did. And then his soul began to adore the Lord for his mercy to him, in keeping him from the Devil when he was drunk, and from committing Murder when he was near it, when he had been in drink: and also, that God had kept others from murdering him; and once from being drowned, when he was in danger of it; and that he was not swept away in his sin. The sense of these mercies made him weep bitterly. And his Sister added, that it is a mercy never to be forgotten, that after all his sins and wicked life God should wait to be gracious to him, and exalt himself to show him mercy: at which his heart seemed to be wonderfully broken, and then more earnestly than ever he desired Prayers, both in public and private; and begging of every one that he thought to be godly, to pray hard for him; and did not cease, but with the greatest earnestness did pray by himself: And holding his Sister by her hand he said, That if the great Jehova would spare him this time; that where his Sister went to look after Salvation, he would never forsake her company whilst he lived, let his Companions jeer and scorn as much as they would, and did also tell her, that when he did jeer and scorn at her for going to the Meetings, his Conscience did even then prick him, and he thought he did not do well in reproaching her, and he did most earnestly profess, that it was his strong Resolution to break off with his old Companions, and to close with the people of God, and walk with them, if God would spare him life. His Sister asked him, if such and such men had not been instruments of drawing him into sin; and he said no: none but himself drew him, he was the worst instrument of his own damnation; no one was so bad as he, and if there was not great mercy for him, he was utterly undone. He asked his friend this Question, Whether God made any one man to damn him? his friend told him, that God made man for himself, and it was for sin which any committed, and lived and died in, that they were damned, and because they would not come to Christ for life and salvation. He was then exceedingly troubled about his sin, that at night he could not lie in his bed; but risen about eleven of the clock, and fell to reading and weeping as he did before, till about one of the clock; when he had a great conflict with Satan, for to his thinking he said, he saw Satan, telling him of all his evil ways, and bidding him swear and curse as he had done; and he said, avoid Satan, avoid: I am not now as I have been, I have now an Interest in Christ, and have forsaken my sin: then the Devil bade him blaspheme God, and he said, he would not, but bade him avoid, and so he fell a praying, and about two a clock Satan left him; then he went to his friend in bed & asked him if he should come to bed to him, and he bade him come, than he told him of the conflict he had with Satan, and how he resisted him, and that he was gone; and thus they passed the rest of the night in heavenly discourse till the day broke on the Lord's day. When he risen he told them that he should die before Dinner, & so lose the Prayers of the people of God that were to be put up for him, which much afflicted him, for he set much by Prayers, and would ask his Sister if God would not remember the Prayers of those that are now dead, that they put up in their life-time, for he knew his Father and Grandfather were much in that Duty. He asked a Neighbour that came to visit him, to read by him a Book that was lately set forth of a young man in London, that was a Murderer, and died for it: and when he heard some precious promises, and that in particular, when a sinner doth repent from the bottom of his heart God would have mercy on him, he wept bitterly and said, That so far as he knew his heart he did repent unfeignedly; and often desired us to pray for him, that he might have longer time to repent. When it pleased God to lengthen out his life till after Dinner, he was exceeding joyful, for that he was in hopes to enjoy the benefit also of the Prayers of those Christians who meet together on that day to worship God, labouring to get acquaintance with him and his truth; that knowing his will they may do it, and in so doing find rest for their Souls. And although such Assembling were the scorn of this young man, and reproach, yet on this day he was glad to have the case of his Soul presented by them to the Father of Spirits; and how glad would he have been, to have been there in person? But he desires his Sister to read by him, good friends came to visit him, Madam L. did the office of a Gentlewoman and a good Christian for his temporal and eternal good, she brought and sent him things proper for him; but such was the hand of God upon him, that though he could eat, yet he could not swallow Drink or such liquid things towards his end, which was marvellous in our eyes. When he was told that an ejected Minister that preached in the Town that day, would come to visit him, he was extremely glad, and longed for him, and feared his breath would be stopped ere he could come; in the evening he came to him, as soon as he came to his bed side, he was wonderfully raised in his Spirit, that God had let him live to see his face, and took him by the hand and kissed it again and again, and said, Oh Sir! I have but two breaths to fetch in this world and I am gone; Oh, what shall I do to make my Calling and Election sure? tell me quickly, for I am afraid I shall not speak to you long. The Minister thought at first, that he was through want of sleep and the height of his distemper somewhat distracted he spoke so eagerly, and repeated things over so oft: yet though the distemper might be something, after we saw that the certain persuasion of the shortness of his time, the nearness of death and judgement, the wickedness of his life, and the fears of condemnation, made him so exceeding earnest in his expressions and prayer. And in all his discourse he did not speak any idle or impertinent word. The Minister told him, he could not in two words help him to make his Election sure, but must discourse with him first about many things. And asked him why he did doubt of his salvation, for most of the ungedly think they are sure of it? He answered, Because he had been so wicked a sinner as ever breathed, and I fear there is no mercy for me? The Minister said, That all will cry out they are sinners, when affliction is on them, when they are convinced of the evil of no particular sin; yea, but said he, I have been a wicked Drunkard, and a Sabbath breaker, and a profane Swearer: and every one of these fins torment my soul; Oh, good Sir tell me, what shall I do for salvation, I would not cast this poor soul into eternal misery if I could escape it. Canst thou willingly leave these sins said he, as well as grieve for them? Oh, if God would spare me, and give me time to live in the world; All should know that I would never sin as I have done said he. Hast thou no hope that thy soul may be saved from the sin that is past? Answer, Said he, all my hope is in the mercy of God, and the Prayers of good people. Then the Minister said, That God was a merciful God, and full of bowels to poor sinners; but he had no saving mercy now, to such as were under the Gospel, and out of Jesus Christ; for he that made us will not save us, but on the account of satisfaction to his Justice, by Jesus Christ, and it is now in Christ that thou must have redemption; and through his blood the remission of thy sins. Thou must look upon God in Christ, who is God and man, and expect redemption in his blood, and his blood only? After this he wonderfully cried our for redemption in the blood of Christ, and mercy in Christ, and then none but Christ would serve, that Christ seemed to be form in him; and all his Discourse and Prayers savoured of Christ ever after. The Minister asked him why he had such a desire to see him and speak with him, that he never saw before; neither did care for such as he the other day? Because said he, I hear you area good man, and willing to teach the way of salvation; and though I never saw your face till now; yet if I live, I will be still where you are, for you comfort my soul. What thoughts have you of your Companions in sin now, and why do you not desire their Company? Oh saith he, they come not to me now, but those that do come, by the grace of God I will warn them to take heed of sin. And when any did come near, he would ask who's there, such a one? yea; then he would say, Get Christ, get Christ; Oh, repent of sin, make sure of Christ; with such seriousness and life, that it moved the people much that heard him. He asked the Minister, if he thought he had time enough to repent in, for he said he was just dying now; and he thought it was too short, and that God would not accept it. He told him, that if it were true, it was long enough. The Thief on the Cross was but a little while in repentance, and yet he was in Heaven. The soul may turn from sin in a short time, and turn to God in as short. Repentance is but a means the Minister told him also, that if his heart was so grieved for sin and afflicted, that he could wllingly turn from, leave and abhor sin, and as hearty embrace Christ Jesus and an holy life, than his repentance was long enough, if he did now leave the world, and God would accept it, and bade him tronble himself more about the truth of his repentance than the time of it, or length of it. At which he seemed satisfied, for he said still he did repent for sin with all the powers of his soul. The Minister prayed with him, and he would earnestly repeat some Petitions after him. After Prayer the Minister spoke to him something about his sickness, and how he took it, and hoped that it was not to death, but that he might live, and let the world see his repentance in his holy life. He said there was no hope of his life, for he was just going out of the world; but if he did live, he would never be from the place where he preached and prayed. But all his trouble was, that his Election was not sure, so he spoke to his Sister, that he might be decently brought home; and that she should be sure to do what he had spoken to her of; which was to pay some debts. There was another Christian that spoke to him many sweet and precious promises that God had made to repenting sinners. The Minister then took his leave of him, and spoke to this effect to him, That when God did make man, he made him for his own glory, and gave him a righteous Law to walk by: But man fell from God to sin, and regarded not his law at all, but followed the temptations of the Devil and his own Counsel, yet God had bowels of love in him stirring towards poor man, and sent him a Redeemer Jesus Christ, and in him made a Covenant of grace and mercy; that though man had sinned, yet if he would leave sin, and return to God, receive his Son for his Lord and Saviour, he would again receive him into favour, and place him in his glory everlastingly; and to let the world know these things he published the Gospel, and commanded his Ministers to acquaint the world of this love of God Now albeit he had been one of the worst of men, and plunged himself into the sea of God's wrath, and was on the brink of eternity, and dropping into eternal misery, and a separation from the presence of the Lord. Yet so large were the mercies of God to poor sinners in Christ, and for his sake, that if he could now but receive Christ on his terms, to be guided by him, sanctified and saved, and by repentance could loathe the dearest sins he had lived in, and by the spirit of grace raise up his heart to full purposes of newness of life: God had abundantly promised, that though his sins were as red as scarlet, yet he would make them as white as wool; and where sin had abounded, grace should superabound, and though he came in the Vine-yard at the eleventh hour, the last week of his life, yet should he have the penny; and he exhorted him to stretch out the desires of his soul towards Jesus Christ, & lay the stress of his happiness on his blood shed & merits, and then though God had been always angry with him for his wickedness, yet he always loved Christ, and through Christ he would love him, and prayed him willingly to choose Christ for his Priest to satisfy God for his sin; and his King and Lord to save him from sin and Satan, and under his shadow to go to the Father: and as the Prodigal did confess his sin, and then there was hope concerning his everlasting happiness; as he had made the pleasing of his flesh to be his happiness in the sins of drunkenness, so now make God thy chiefest good, and Christ the way to enjoy him, and it will be well with thee: commit thy soul into his hands, as into the hands of a merciful Redeemer, and the Lord be thy everlasting portion in Heaven. And after the fullest expressions on his part to choose God for his God, and rely on Christ for redemption; They parted with many sweet wishes for an happy meeting in Heaven, and with the stirring of much affection of those that stood by. One offered him some drink which he refused, and said, I have but two breaths to fetch, and do you stop me now, & hinder me, away away; then he exhorted to leave sin and get Christ, all that come to him that he knew had been his Companions; and encouraged the godly in their religious ways. And fell into serious Prayer for saving grace, and for the holy Spirit, and that Christ would save his soul, oftentimes repeating this word, Blot me not out of thy remembrance good God. And he said, it is an hard work I am upon, but a sweet work; then he cried, Oh tell my Companions, and warn them to get Christ, and not to put off repentance so long as I have done! And looked on his Sister Dorothy, and earnestly entreated her to Sound out his Repentance; for said he, The Town knoweth that I have been a wicked sinner, this he said several times; and feeling death near, he said to his friends that stood by. Come now one faithful Prayer at the last, one faithful Prayer at the last; he than prayed more silently, and continued till death seized on him. The last Petition he was hearp to say was this, Come Lord Jesus and meet me, Now come my Christ; and so he fell asleep (we hope in the Lord) about one of the Clock in the morning, Feb. 21. 1668. FINIS.