The Rump served in with a Grand salad. OR, A NEW BALLAD,  
To the Tune of the Blacksmith.  

1.  
POetical Muses have fallen heavy as a Mallet,  
Upon the Poor RUMP for disgusting their Pallet,  
To cure the Disrellish take now a Grand salad.  
Which nobody can deny.   

2.  
This RUMP is derived by lineal descent,  
As the undoubted Heir, and excrement,  
Of the yet perpetual Parliament.  
Which, &c.   

3.  
This was such an Idol, as the zealots did strain  
Their Purses and Consciences for to maintain,  
Though it proved both of Church and kingdom the Bane.  
Which, &c.   

4.  
The Tail of the Dragon's not so bad as this RUMP,  
Which hath three such kingdom's worens to the very Stump,  
And must leave them for the time a confused Lump.  
Which, &c.   

5.  
Our Laws, Lives, Lands, Liberties, were upon sale  
By this everlasting RUMP, Fag-end, or Tail,  
Yea to save our very Souls they refused to take bail.  
Which, &c.   

6.  
A Tail which was eaten up almost of the Pox,  
That stunk more like carrion, than ever did Fox,  
Or that which was roasted of late at the Stocks.  
Which, &c.   

7.  
A RUMP that the People did hate, scorn, and curse,  
As a Devil incarnate, or of somewhat that's worse,  
Of schism and Rebellion both Mother and Nurse.  
Which, &c.   

8.  
The Orthodox Clergy they forced for to fly,  
They were plundered, and sequestered without reason why,  
But only because that they could not comply.  
Which, &c.   

9  
Then as guilty of Popery the Common Prayer Book was damned,  
And with all kind of News-books the Churches were crammed,  
Venting lies, nonsense, Blasphemy, and what's not to be named.  
Which, &c.   

10.  
Then the ancient order of Bishops went down,  
Which in the Church Christian was ever of Renown,  
The Proverb proves true, No mitre, no Crown.  
Which, &c.   

11.  
In whose stead were planted Elders and Presbyters,  
Which empowered, break Princes, and people in fitters,  
And with their Classes and Asses them all to besquitters.  
Which, &c.   

12.  
They called then a Synod which scarce could agree  
I'th'space of three years whether there be a trinity,  
From such pur-pure-blind Levites GOD bless you and me.  
Which, &c.   

13.  
That Assembly was just like the Members that chose it,  
Without Learning and Honesty, all the World knows it,  
Fit Jakes-farmers for the RUMP, they could twang and nose it.  
Which, &c.   

14.  
They combined with the Scots to bring in a Directory,  
Tending neither to our Good, nor yet to God's Glory;  
'Tis a shame that Tom Fuller should name't in Church-story.  
which, &c.   

15.  
For whereas a Christian should be taught how to pray,  
And both rightly to believe, and humbly to obey,  
Nor Lord's Prayer, nor Creed, nor Decalogue have they.  
Which, &c.   

16.  
Then curse ye Meroz, in each pulpit did thunder,  
To perplex the poor people and keep them in wonder,  
Till all the Reins of Government were broke quite asunder.  
Which, &c.   

17.  
Then Saint Paul's the Mother-church of this City and Nation,  
Was turned to a Stable, O strange profanation!  
Yet this was one of the best fruits of their Reformation.  
Which, &c.   

18.  
Of all that is Christian they make no great matter,  
So they may but gather, they care not who scatter;  
Their Triers would approve none but such as bribe and flatter.  
Which, &c.   

19  
In stead of an Use of Divine Consolation  
These Hypocrites published a late Exhortation  
To trepan and beggar this City and Nation.  
Which, &c.   

20.  
If they be established, bid England farewell,  
And rather than live here i'th' Suburbs of Hell,  
Choose Turkey, or Tartary, or anywhere to dwell.  
which, &c.   

21.  
This Form will ne'er suit with the English Complexion  
Which is free and too heroic to yield base Subjection,  
Or to take from a Pope in each Parish correction.  
Which, &c.   

22.  
Who ever did Lord it like these Self-seeking Elves,  
Which have forced us on Covenants, Vows, Oaths, & other shelves,  
That should warn us for the future to look to-our selves.  
which, &c.   

23.  
All sober Men know that 'tis a mischievous Fate,  
A kingdom to turn into a popular State,  
And Episcopacy into a Presbyterate.  
Which, &c.   

24.  
Yet the Parliament set up the pure Members five,  
Both of Church and kingdom the Downfall to contrive,  
That by the Ruins of our Zion this their Babel might thrive.  
Which, &c.   

25.  
The Presbyters Three Years were long since expired,  
And yet, as if they had not our Patience quite tired,  
To spurgall us still they have afresh conspired.  
which, &c.   

26.  
Then why so many Bonfires of late in the City?  
Why such ringing of Bells, and rejoicing? 'Tis pity  
That ye should be so gulled by the Rump, that does outwit ye.  
which, &c.   

27.  
For the House is like Hydra, if one Head ye kill,  
Another starts up, and another full as ill;  
So, though one Rump is gone, yet another sits still.  
Which, &c.   

28.  
They have altered the Scene, the People to please,  
Because in Commotions they must them appease;  
We have thus changed our Bed, but not our Disease.  
which, &c.   

29.  
Their shifting and shuffling is but to decoy us,  
While Spiders do spin, their cobwebs annoy us,  
If the House be ned swept clean, ere long they'll destroy us.  
which, &c.   

30.  
If they mean as they talk of a Parliament free,  
How comes it that such Qualifications we see,  
That no one known ROYALIST can chosen be?  
which, &c.   

31.  
The best things corrupted do ever prove worst,  
Then that the next, Parliament make amends for the first,  
Let's choose no more zealots, lest in pieces we burst.  
which, &c.   

32.  
For when as the schismatics ' th' House do prevail,  
Than the Head and all the Members are led by the Tail,  
So that all parts in doing their Duty needs must fail.  
which, &c.   

33.  
Let the Militia be settled ere you part with your Money,  
Else you'll find them gall and wormwood whom you take for honey,  
And the soldiers will insult o'er as soon as they 've undone ye.  
which, &c.   

34.  
'Tis believed the three Generals, Fairfax, Waller, and Brown,  
Are sorry now for what they once helped to pull down,  
And 'tis hoped they'll redeem it by Deeds of Renown.  
which, &c.   

35.  
We are sensible now that there is no one thing  
Can full Satisfaction to all Interests bring  
But only CHARLES the Second, our known lawful KING.  
which, &c.   

36.  
Let's dally no longer, but like Britain's let's stand  
For GOD and KING CHARLES, and the Laws of the Land;  
Let's up and be doing, let's do't out of Hand.  
Which nobody can deny.    

LONDON, Printed in the Year 1660.