THE FATHERS COUNSELL. OR, Certain useful Directions, for all young persons, especially elder Brothers, whose portion it is or may be, in these perilous days, to be left in a Fatherless or Friendless Condition. By W. T. LONDON, Printed by G M, for Christopher Meredith at the sign of the Crane in Paul's Churchyard, 1644. THE FATHER'S COUNSEL. My Son, GOD hath given thee thy being, in a doleful age, thou livest in times streaming in blood, abounding in sin; and alas, therefore bloody, because sinful, and thine unhappiness is the greater, (though perchance thy fear be the less) that thy blossom years, render thee unsensible of the present misery. Life is now, to them that can judge of it, a sad and melancholy thing, death uncertain, yet at our doors, friends prove flaggy, and foes merciless, the world deceitful, distractions rage within us and dangers without us, GOD'S judgements round about us, and this is the temper of these times; And now my Son, how wilt thou demean thyself, in this comfortless condition. To rest upon Friends is but a fading shelter, Alas how many perils be there on all sides, to take them from thee. To rest on other means, they may prove but broken reeds, for where the Enemy comes, he commonly sweeps clean and leaves men, almost as naked to the world, as Nature brought them into it; Now where Friends and humane Supports fail, what shall be thy Refuge? Why, let Davias' charge to his soul, be the practice of thine, Put thy trust in God. Put thy trust in God, for God and a good conscience in Sunshine days are the sweetest joys, and in the times of trouble the safest harbours, when storms arise, and winds blow, and billows swell, and no Haven appears, but blood and death riot in all places, yet even then an honest and sincere heart, which hath made its peace with God through Christ, is as safely harboured as Noah in his Ark, when the waves surrounded him. Now, my Son, because it is not given me to know to what times, or length of days God hath reserved thee, and for that it may possibly be thy portion, to survive the calamities this present age groans under, and perchance in the mean time lose all those faithful Friends, to whose counsels forty Education, God and Nature hath engaged thee, I thought it fit to leave thee in supply of other helps, these ensuing Directions First, Know this, and lay it up in the Closet of your heart, as your dearest and chiefest meditation, That the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom: A good understanding have they that do thereafter, the parise of it endures for ever. For your carriage towards God let it be even, close and regular, walk sully with him, rest firmly on him, therefore take special heed of spiritual distempers, to be sometimes hot, sometimes cold, sometimes lukewarm, but labour for stability in Religion, as well as truth, for this will arm you against the break out of your corrupt heart, and against those diversities of temptations which the world and the devil will be sure to cast upon thee. For your carriage towards men, and your ordinary demeanour in the general course of your life, see your deal be fair, your words faithful, your heart sincere, your conversation lovely, let thy life speak thy Religion, rather than thy Discourse, be courteous towards all, but familiar only with the best, and make such your bosom friends, in whose choice society you may happily either do, or receive some good. This course will begin you a Heaven upon Faith, and keep your soul alwa es in an improoving condition. What ever your state of life shall be, whether conjugal or single, be sure to exercise your abilities, in some particular calling, I wish it may be in the Ministry, this is the chiefest in my desires, and I pray God it may prove the dearest in your affections, but I speak this in way of advice, not injunction, for the bent and ready inclination of your mind must much direct your choice in this particular, but however your Genius frame, I here charge you, that as you tender the admonition of a Father, to whose faithful Instructions God hath obliged you, that you detest with a perfect hatred, that specious, but pernicious sin of idleness, Yea that you abhor and abandon it with as much indignation as you would a poisonful Serpent; for this destructive vice will render you displeasing to God, unprofitable to the world, unfruitful in your Family, contagious to all men, scandalous to the best, and burden some to yourself, believe it, God hath not placed man on Earth, as the Leviathan in the Sea, to take his pastime therein, But man (saith job) is borne to labour; as the sparks fly upward, so naturally. And here let no elder Brother shelter himself under is fair estate, or plead the Inheritance of his Father, for his sloth, for Cain and Abel, though heirs of the whole world had their employments; and the precept is general reaching in all degrees of persons, Of the sweat of thy brows shalt thou eat thy bread. As for the ordering of the estate wherewith God shall intrust you, for you must remember you are but his Steward, be frugal, but not base, circumspect, but not unjust, One penny in a pound ill gotten, may like a thief in the Candle, eat out all the rest of your increase, Enlarge your heart in works of mercy towards others, as God shall be pleased, to enlarge his hand of bounty towards you. This is the surest way to make your life more comfortable and your estate more full. Let your Hospitality be moderate, and according to the measure of thy estate, rather plentiful then sparing, but not costly, for I never knew any grow poor by keeping an orderly Table, but some consume themselves through secret vices, and then Hospitality bears the blame. Be sure to banish drunkenness out of thy house, which is a swinish vice, and doth impair the health, both of body and soul, consumes much and makes no show. Let it be the business of thine heart, as well as of thine eye to have religious Exercises, constantly performed in thy Family, twice in the day at the least, if not oftener, besides thy private Devotions; And that the same may be performed with such honour, regard and reverence, as becomes so high a work, post not off that service to some ordinary Servant (as is too commonly done) (for who is sufficient for these things) but discharge it zealously distinctly and understandingly in thine own person; Take heed of carrying on these Exercises in thy household as a set and imposed task only, as thinking when the prayers are ended, the business is done. I tell thee, thou mayest speak much to God and pray little; This business is a work of the inner man; and therefore whatsoever you do for God, do it with all your might; Call in your will, understanding, affections, all the faculties of your soul to give attendance on this duty. One thing more, if any sudden and unexpected accident have moved thy passions, and raised some tempest within thee; O pray not to God in that temper, but approach thou to God, as God came to Elijah, in a quiet and still voice, not in a whirlwind. God is a God of love and peace, and therefore compose thy heart and becalm all distempers in thy mind before thou presume into the presence of so high a Majesty. And here (my Son) I must admonish thee of a necessary duty, the which indeed (shame to this enlightened and knowing age) is little known and less practised, that is, the Catechising and instructing of servants and children in the grounds of Religion, in private Families, by the Masters and Governors thereof; Which course were it more generally and effectually set upon, certainly God would be more glorified, his Word and Sacraments, more reverently handled, and the People better edified, than our former days have seen. I know well the duty of Catechising (the general neglect whereof the Land hath cause to lament with tears of blood) doth properly belong to the Pastoral charge, yet all Masters of Families are or aught to be, like Abraham and joshuah, Priests and Prophets in their own houses, and help lay the foundation of Religion in the people's hearts, that so by both working together, the business might be advanced to a more glorious improovement; were this necessary duty throughly pressed, and understandingly carried on through all parts of this Kingdom, then should we not to our scandal and scorn, see so many Schisms in our Church, so many disorders and fractions in the State, such diversities of opinions broached amongst us, such unmannerly and unreverent carriage in God's worship in many places. In a word, then should we not see so many thousand poor souls perish for want of knowledge, walking in the dark ways of their own seduced hearts, and acting all things as their lusts, or (perchance) some ignorant leaders guide them. My Son, according to thy place, power and parts do thou thy duty in this particular, and stir up others in the prosecution hereof, as knowing that he which converts a soul from the error of his way, shall shine as the Stars in the Firmament. If it shall please God to bring thee tomans' estate, use exceeding great care and caution in the choice of thy wife, if thy affections incline that way. And herein in the first place seek unto God to counsel thee, and he will direct thy path, you have his promise for it, Prov. 3.6. in all thy ways acknowledge him (saith Solomon) and he shall direct thy ways: This advice is better known then well improved, often spoken, exceeding, seldom done, but take you God's word for good secu\ritie, believe it, the Psalmists words are true, Psalm. 9.10. He never faileth them that seek him; Now when you have consulted with God, be industriously inquisitive into the disposition, inclination, stock, but especially the Religion of the party commended to your choice, for its heavy drawing in an uneven yoke, and however it be true, that parentage, parts and portion are good Ingredients in your match, yet these must not be the principles to guide your choice, let her be gracious rather then great, yet richly adorned, I mean, all glorious within, and then what ever imperfections shall arise from her nature, they will be her urthen as well as thine; Religion is the sweetest and strongest tie, and those that are so conjoined, nothing but death, nay in truth, neither life nor death can part them. If God shall be pleased to bless you hereafter with any children, be careful to present before their blossom years, an unblameable life, in your own example, For your personal demeanour and ordinary carriage amongst them will have a very powerful Influence upon their dispositions, they being always exceedingly inclined to take in the habits either of virtue or vice from their parents footsteps. And therefore if you find any natural Infirmities (be it passion) or any other innate quality) tolie strong upon you, labour to bear down the strength thereof at all times, but especially in the presence of your children, lest your actual break out, inflame their sparks, and cause those ill seeds to bud forth in them, which your nature hath settled in their blood. Certainly much Christian prudence may be showed in the education of Children, by stopping the stream of their inclinations in the bud, before they flow too high, and by seasoning their mind with religious principles before their corruptions are fortified in them, otherwise at will prove true, Difficulter eradicatur quod rudes animi combiberunt. In your ordinary Conversation amongst your children, be not so indulgently familiar, as to make them forget their distance, nor so rigoriously austere, as to discourage them. I am persuaded the foolish cockering of some Parents, and the oversterne carriage of others, causeth more men and women to miscarry, than their own vicious inclinations. Give your children a competent maintenance according to your ability, otherwise your life will seem their bondage, and what portion you shall leave them, they will thank death for it, not you Bring them up in Religion, learning and obedience, and neglectnot to settle them in some honest vocation; for if thou dost not employ thy children, the devil will. Better thy son were a basketmaker then an idle drone. As concerning the ordering of thy Family, let that be like a little City compacted in itself. Unity and unanimitieare beautiful accommodations in every household, and where they are advanced and preserved inviolable, they facilitate domestical employments, causing them to be carried on with more alacrity and sweetness. In a word, where Truth and Peace, in any civil society, do kiss each other, and go hand in hand together, they usher in God's love, and do clearly evidence that God is in that place indeed, for it is God that makes men to be of one mind in a house: Therefore labour earnestly in thy Family to make good the Apostolical counsel, namely to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. Let thy friends and allies be welcome to thy Table, grace them with thy countenance, and further them in all honest actions, for by this means thou shalt so double the bond of nature, as that thou shalt find them so many Advocates, to plead and apologise for thee, behind thy back. But shake off those Glowworms, I mean Paracits and Sychophonts, who will feed and fawn upon thee, in the Summer of thy prosperity, but in adverse storms will shelter thee, no more than an arbour in winter. Undertake no suit against a poor man without receiving much wrong, for besides that thou makest him thy competitour; it is a base conquest to triumph where there is small resistance, and can be little gain; neither attempt Law against any man, before thou be sure, thou hast right on thy side, and then spare for neither money nor pains, for a cause or two so followed and obtained may free the from suits a great part of thy life. Carry thy mind equally poised through all conditions that shall befall thee, if God be gracious to thee in a large dispensation of his blessings, be thankful, but not secure, perchance some storm may be near at hand, and its wisdom in the midst of abundance to expect a change or, on the otherside, if God shallcast thee under a Cloud, lay some pressure upon thee, be humble, but not discouraged, perchance God will have the world become more bitter to thee, that himself may become more sweet. What ever thou wouldst judge best, if thou wert now to die, the same think always best, even in thy most healthfullest condition, for howsoever a seduced heart doth deceive us, certainly that which is best at last is best at first too, and that is the happiest life which is ruled by dying Principles. When thou seest so much bussing and distemper in the world, cast with thyself, who would bottom his soul upon so base a foundation, and uncertain hold, and be incited hereupon to look upwards, and labour with all thy might to get an interest in Jesus Christ, for union with him always draws safety and protection from him; And whosoever fears to offend him unfeignedly, he needs fear nothing else. If a man be a diligent observer of his course of life, he shall seldom find himself free from all kind of offences, but one corruption shall trouble him much, if another be weakened, yea and without much strength of grace shall prevail against him; lusts will be violent and hardly take an answer; but, my Son, though these unlucky birds light upon thy head, yet let them not lodge within thy heart, and because every man hath his bosom sin, which doth more strongly and more oft besiege him, strive to find that out, and then keep the strongest watch, where thou suspectest the greatest battery. When thou addressest thyself to any duty or employment, whether it be spiritual or civil: Never attempt any thing, haesitante animo, with a doubtful and divided mind, but be always clearly satisfied in thy judgement of the lawfulness of that which thy heart or hand shall go about, otherwise thy too late providence may procure thee long repentance; if the case be of that nature, that thou canst not wind thyself out, light thy candle at others, whom thou hast cause to think by their place and parts should see further than thyself. Certainly many Christians would find more sound peace within, did thy seek themselves more abroad, I mean, if in a prudential way, they did close in with some faithful Pastor or friend, to be a constant counsellor to them, and who in cases of difficulty and above their reach might give them aim and direction; But alas so strong is old Adam in us, that we oftentimes times fear to ask advise, because we would not be taken off and unadvised from those things to which our corrupted hearts advise us, this is a cunning slight of Sa●an, take thou heed of it, and in all thy undertake, consider and consult, and then go on with cheerfulness, and thou wilt conclude with peace. There is a common deceit of heart, possesseth many Christians, in the hearing of the word, which because it suits so well with corrupt nature, is hardly discovered by them. Many there are, who delight to feed altogether upon on the Mountains high and lofty speculations, exceedingly take them; but if the Preacher carry on his endeavours in an humble and low sail, they find but cold acceptance. This is an evil under the Sun, and it is much amongst men, it is a plague in the heart, which wanton wits will one day mourn for. But thou, my Son, know, God never set up this glorious Ordinance of preaching, to woo the fancy, but to win the soul: Abuse not therefore his loving kindness unto wantonness, but ever esteem that most pleasant to thy ear, which proves most fruitful to thy soul. judge not of thy present condition by the plentiful means of grace thou livest under, but by what thou feelest, and what thou art, if the Ordinances of God have wrought upon thy inward man, and thou findest the frame, temper and disposition of thy soul renewed, than hast thou some comfortable evidence of a growing condition; but if there be no new Creation wrought in thee; if thou continuest as proud as ever, as fruitless as ever, as profane as ever, then certainly the word of grace, though in itself, it be the word of life, Yet hitherto hath been but a dead letter unto thee, nay thou art therefore worse, because thou shouldest be better; The light which thou hast received will but heighten thy sin, and add weight to thy punishment. Many hear much yet take in little fruit, because they writ much, but use no after reckon, and so by this means lose both their pains and profit; this is one of Satan's sleights, who when he cannot hinder the free passage of God's Ordinances, labours to make them successlesse in their use. Take heed of this delusion. Shouldst thou note off half thy days, thou canst call nothing more thine own then what thou dost remember, nor will that further pleasure thee then as it shall be digested into thy understanding, and affection and practise. Mistake not, I speak not this to discourage thee in the practice of this particular, which I do highly commend, but to direct thee in the use. It may tend much to the advantage of thy soul, in thy Christian race, sometimes to run over the Story of thy former vanities, and to study the several passages of Gods gracious providence over thee in the days of thy Youth, as to meditate in such manner, * Quanta super eos gratia Deus vigilat quos in sua de si deria non relaxat. Had not the good hand of God restrained me, when the lust of my flesh and the pleasures of my eye, were the only joy of my heart; alas how easily might sin and Satan have then enthralled me, and my lust have become my Law; but blessed be God who hath not given me over as a prey to my corruptions, he hath broken the snare, and my soul is delivered, Therefore whilst I live, will I praise the Lord, yea, so long as I have any being, I will sing praises to my God. Thy whole life, whilst thou sojournest in this valley of tears is nothing else but a dying condition, a continual progress unto death, it will be thy wisdom therefore without further procrastinations, to improve this golden, yet sliding opportunity, to the best advantage of thy soul, as knowing thou sowest here that seed, the fruit whereof will hereafter in another world either for good or for evil, spring up to an everlasting harvest. And therefore in all thy thoughts, words, actions, directions, and conclusions, Let that precious rule of the Prophet David be thy vade mecum, live and die with thee, Keep innocency and do the thing which is right, for that will bring a man peace at the last. And since that, where thy treasure is, there will thy heart be also, therefore where thy God is, there let thy treasure be. All creature comforts have their alleys of bitterness, their ingredients of sorrows in them, they are but shadows and vanity, being laid in the ●allance to things above. Alas what is all the riches thou ●anst here enjoy to the gain of Christ, what thy honour to the inheritance of the Saints, what thy comforts to the joy of the Spirit; yea what thy life to that everlasting, ever glorious being, whose joys shall never find either bounds or bottom; o therefore labour instantly, pray uncessantly, that thou mayst be able to feel & say, The Lord is my portion, therefore can I lack nothing; for he must needs have all things, who possesseth him that possesseth all things. Now that thou mayst have sound evidence in thy soul, that thytreasure is above thee, Lay out all the strength of thy endeavours to gain a burning & flaming love towards God into thy soul, o how happy Christians should we be, could we in David's words with David's spirit say, Lord I love thee dearly. Indeed we cannot love him fully, yet in his gracious and sweet acceptance, We love him sufficiently, if we love him faithfully. And in what measure we love God, we are sure in a far higher and more transcendent measure to be beloved of him. Nemo diffidate se amari qui jam amat, quomodo enim amare pigebit qui amavit, nec dum amantes. FINIS.