The Welsh Physician, HER New way to cure all kind of Diseases in her Churches and Commonwealths.  

1. Her undertakes to cure perfectly all Diseases in her she-Cousens.  
2. Her will undertake to make all omens that are barons be as pig as her can tumble in two or three nights.  
3. Her professes to restore her Cousin's Maidenheads, and Virginities in a small space, and with much facilities.  
4. Her will cure all the Agues that are in her States and her Kingdoms, arising from her factious and turbulent humours.  
5. Her will set all the bones that were broken at Keinton among her Cousins though it were in her necks.  
6. Her will purge the stomach of her Church of all her Errors.   
Whereas it is caknown that her English Doctors kill not above three quarters of her Patients that come under her hands, her will undertake to kill them all, and make her all live again in an instants.  
By Shinkin ap Morgan, Professor of her medical Arts and Sciences.  
Printed for the good of her Countrymen, this present year, 1647.   

The Welsh-Physitian. Her new way to cure all Diseases in Church and Commonwealth.  
HEr understanding that all her shee-cozens in general are subject to divers qualms and diseases, her having been a long time conversant with her shee-cozens podies, finds by her experiences and her skills, that the generallest disease all her cousins are subject to, is the glimmering of her gizzards, an infirmity which arising from her spleen into her mouth, infects her tongue like a canker, making her call her husband's rogues and rascals, and many other scurvy ords: It makes her likewise oftentimes to strive for her breeches and break her husband's pates with her ladles and skimmers, and is indeed an Epedemical disease, and reigning in most of her shee-Couzens: The cure hereof, though Galen hath not set down, nor her Hypocrates, nor Averro, nor Avicen her Cousins, yet shall her Cousin Jenkin in priefe declare the remedy for that disease.  
First when her gins to be in her fits, her husbands shall perceive it by the bending of her brows, then let him apply to her a plaster of good ords, and if that will not serve her turns, let him take her good hazel cudgel or her rope's end, and baste her as her Welsh-men do her old goats to make them eat tender, for so her Cousin King Tavid did, as you may find it some where written; And Tavid went in and did so lace his wife; therefore her and aule her Countrymen may therefore baste their wives by authority and privilege, and liberty of the subject: for her do find it by experience and by her reading, that the more her do beat her Walnut-trees, and Spaniel and Camomile bank be basted or trodden, the more fruit they will bear, and the women love their husbands the better, and this will cure her presently, with twice or thrice applied to her sides. There is another remedy which Jenkin herself hath often used with her Wives, which is to take her as her fit gins, and lay her upon her back and tickle her Tuquoques, and it shall cure her in an instant; Probatum est.  
The quavering of the kidneys in her she-cozens, is when her is full of her lusts and concupiscences, and her much long and desires to make her husband's Cuckolds. In Spain her Cousins the Spaniards have excellent remedies for these diseases in her Wives, for as soon as her perceives and caknowes that her Wives are bend to be sick of the quavering of her kidneys, her lets her blood in her breast or in the bellies with her sword or her taggers, marry Jenkin would wish her Cousins to use this easier remedies and medicines, which is when her omens flesh rises and would go to man's, let her husbands give her two ounces of could instructions, with three ounces of the oil of man distilled through his own alembic, a vomit and potion made of opium and her turnips, than let her have a diet for a month of her welsh leeks without bread or salt, and it shall recover her perfectly; Probatum est.  
For her barren Cousins, her shall by her preservatives and her Medicines make her as pregnant as her heart can wish, and have every year a shield if there be no defect in her capacities of her podies: First let her eat the brains of a He goat mixed with the marrow of a Stoate, or Polecat (her may caknow him by her sinell and her savours) with the flesh of her monkeys for a Fortnight's, and drink every morning a pottle of her best welsh Metheglins. Then let her get her into a could soft beds, and have every night for the space of a month, a lusty young man to her ped-fellow to salute her podies and recreate her kidneys, and if her pe not with shield Jenkin will forfeit her reputations in Physgigs. This medicine is most predominant over her Cousins in her Cities, and may serve indeed for omens of all Nations under forty years of age, whereas divers of her Cousins have had the wambling trot in her pellies, or the dislocation in the matrix, which is occasioned by much ploods and itches in her podies, whereby oftentimes her comes to lose her Maidenheads and her Virginities, which her foolish Physicians in times past knew not how to cure. Jenkin for the good of her dearest Couhens hath found out the medicines that will restore her to her Virginities, which is, her must take a peck of Fern-sut gathered on Midsummer night, with two ounces of moonshine tasen out of her river of Dee at noon-days, six eyes of the Phoenix, seven eyes of Argus, with her Cousin Mercury pulled out of her head, the brains of the bird of Paradise which sung to her Gransieur Adam, the flesh of the buttock of one of her Welsh goats which her Cousin Noah's had in her Arks, the juice of the apple which her Grandmother Eve eat at the enticement of the Serpent, the head of the great huge fish of two hundred yard long that was taken in eighty eights with a great ruff like a Spaniard, above London bridge, a bottle full of the water of the Enchanters wells which was kept by the great Dragons that was overcome by her Cousins Palmerius, and Saint Tavids, two yards of freeze which was in her Prophet Merlin's old coats, five onions of Jenkins own planting and six pound of leeks, take all these and stamp them upon the stone where Jacob slept, and strain them through one of the clouds which hang over her welsh Mountains, and then take all these her ingredients and lap her up in a yard of Butter-flies-skins, and lay her warm to her cousin's bottom of her bellies, and so let her renew the plaster or cataplasm, do you see every night a fresh, and it shall make her cousins as sound and firm in her Maidenheads and her Virginities as ever her was in her lives, and her may be certain that Jenkin hath made his explorations and experiments upon this medicine, and find it to be very available; Probatum est.  
Her also doth undertake to cure all her Agues and Fevers that are in her states and her Kingdoms arising from her factious and Malignant humours which indeed and insooth none can cure without phlebotomy or blood-letting; but her cousin jenkin's, which must be done in this manner. First her State or her Kingdom must take fifty or threescore heads of her Malignants and poyle them to a jell●y in a hundred Cavaliers ploods, then take the fat of six Jesuits that were hanged drawn and quartered at Tyburn, do you mark, and with the brawn of a hundred of Prelates buttocks stewed in Metheglins, and let all these ingredients be laid on the stomach of her state or her Kingdom, and it shall expel her Agues and her Fevers, or otherwise. take two ounces and six pound of the long hair of your Cavaliers which in welsh her calls Russetings, and make therewith a Cat-a-pulsive with the blood of some Anabaptists, and applied as aforesaid, and your sick state shall recover immediately without the help of her Doctors and her Physicians, as Jenkin has made divers rhymes her experiences and probations upon all the Kingdoms of Asia the less; Probatum est.  
Next whereas her has been informed that divers of her Cousins have lost her legs and her arms, and many of her have book her necks at Kenton battles, her has studied a medicine that shall recover her perfectly, let her come to her Cousin Jenkins lodgings at the sign of the Welsh goat in Garlick-lane with her broken legs, arms, or necks, and her will make her as sound as ever her was in her lives; Probatum est.  
Next her does profess to give her Church a vomit and a purge that shall make her free from all her pains in the stomach, her must first take a long stick of Stibium, which in Welsh is called the Gallows, and hang thereon three hundred Brownists, five hundred Anabaptists, and as many of all sorts of her Separatists, and then let her dry in the sun fourteen weeks, and then beat her to powder, and mix her with a great deal of oil extracted from her Cavaliers slocks, and let this be given to her Church through the great Organ pipe that was in her Church of Paul's, and it shall make her Church vomit and purge up all her errors and her heresies, and put her into as good states and conditions of her health, as her was in the days of her Apostles; especially when her Cousin Jenkin gives her clyster to make her evacuate her Bishop's and Prelates backward, which must be compounded on this manners. First, her must take two handfuls of herb a grace, of which there is enough in her Welsh Mountains, and mingle it with the surrups of two and twenty Mitres, boiled in the jayce of as many Rochets and Surplices, and let it be put in at the fundament or porch of the Church, and is shall give her thirty or forty of her stool which shall clear her podies of all her Bishop's and her Prelates, and send herto the Tivell with a vengeance.  
Lastly with her diet and her purge, her cordial and her vomit, her will cure all her Cousins that are Cuckolds of horns, and make her brows as smooth as the backs of her hands, which if any of all her London Physician can perform, Jenkin will never set up her pills nor her prescriptions, her will also with confection of toasted sheese, metheglin, green leeks and onions, undertake to kill her a hundred a ditty, and with her Goat's milk mixed with the buds of her welsh gunshot, which in English is called Eldern, restore her again to her lifes in a minute's space, and all this to be performed by Jenkin ap Morgan Doctor of Physgig, and studier of all the arts of medicine as her testifies under her hands, and hopes that all her Cousins that are sick of the said diseases will buy her Cousins book of medicines and repair to her for cure, and advice.   

The last Will and Testament of Thomas up Shinkin, up Morgan, up Howell, up Ralph, up Shone, up Taffie, Shentileman of Wales, which her was write and publish fifteen tayes after her teeth.  
IN te name of te great got, Amen, to morrow after te feast of Saint Taffie in te foverteen, fifteen, twenty year of te create Cadwallin te pig, son and heir te create Prate te create Prittain, I Thomas up Shinken, up Shone, up Taffie peing sick of body, put in mind and memory, was here make her last Will and Testament, first her was make her loving wife Madge her sole executioner. Item, her was kive her eldest son Shone up Thomas up Shinkin, up Morgan, up Howell, up William, up ●●ph, up Shone, up Taffie, her create stone house which was stand in te portom of te create Mountain in te full face of te sun.  

Item, her was kive her loving wife Madges her sole extentioner, her other house called her moist shennet with te privy house and awl te appurtenances teteunto.  
Item, her was kive her eldest servant Shames, up G●●t●●, Morgan, up Lewis, up Shones, up Shone, pecaus her was porne a Shentileman, and was stay her servant a treat while, four yard of Frise to make her mourning shaket.  
Item, Her was kive her Taughter Shennie four yard of Pullrush to make her cold ring.  
Item, Her was kive ten shillings for shunkets; Imprimis, four create sheezes cut out in Causebobby, four pushels of creen Leeks roasted, and four pushels of Onions, to make awl her cousins and kinsfolks cry.  
Item, Her was kive ten shillings to te create Clerk of create Saint Maries, tat her could ring te create Pell, to kive warning tat her was coming, that Saint Peter might open her cate, and let her in.  
Item, Her toe entreat her loving wife Madge, her sole execetioner to pe honest, and pay awl her tepts, her cannot choose put pay.  
Item, Her tesire her cretitors to take a pound of criefe for a pound of moneys, for faith if her was long lived, her was peen honest to every body.  
Item, tus her tesire cot to receive her soul, who was her Maker and Redeemer, and her was tesire her body shod pe puried in te shurch of Saint Mary, and also I tesire to see shentilemen tat are my Neighbours present to set their hands here as witless that I tie in te true Protestantie Faith.   
Giles up Morgan, up Harry up Ralph, Simon up Thomas up Mordant, up Taffie, Ralph up Shinkin, up Morgan up Taffie, her Cousins.  
FINIS.