A SPEECH MADE BY SERGEANT WILD In the Honourable House of COMMONS, IN THE CAUSE OF Mercurius Britanicus.  
As it was also (the next day) delivered from his own Mouth in a Boat, as he passed between the Temple Stairs, and Westminster Bridge, heretofore called KING'S Bridge.   royal crowns of England, Scotland, France and Ireland 
M. DC.XXXXV.   

Mr SERGEANT WILD His Speech in the Honourable House of Commons, the 32. of May, in the Cause of Mercurius Britanicus.  
WE related unto you in our last work, the two, (or both) the Houses were totally or wholly busied all day, (or from Morning till Night) concerning what rewards Mercurius Britannicus was worthy to have, for his serviceable, laudable, and indefatigable painstaking, in his weekly writings for the Parliament, where many of the House of Commons, were of opinion, that the Gentleman had deserved well, but there was not resolved or settled resolution amongst them, what to determine of him; where contrary to the wisdom, wit, sense, reason, and inclination of the House, the Grave and Ancient Knight (Sir Benjamin Ruddyard) only opposing, and bitterly inveighing against him, (as we have truly related in our former occurrences of the 31. of April last) where that important business was left to the discretion and censure of the House. So that this day the matter being again renewed and debated on, Mr Sergeant wild, was appointed to plead in the ease of Britanicus, who like a second Cicero, or a double demie Demosthenes, declared himself both a Learned Advocate, and an Eloquent Orator as followeth.  
RIght Honourable, and most constant Conscript Patriots, if the worth and merits of the Gentleman in whose cause I speak at this time, be well weighed and considered, the speech of an Advocate would be superfluous, and time being so precious as it is, this Honourable Assembly might employ it in more necessary and urgent occasions. But when a person so high deserving, is malignantly traduced, and the Magnificent Beneficence of your unparallelled gratitude to noble endeavourers, and studious paines-takers, so transcendently calumniated, it is then high time to speak, if his own deserts were tonguetied, dumb, mute, silent or speechless.  
I have read in he voluminous collections of Mr Samuel Purchas, (entitled Purchas his Pilgrimage) of the Kingdom of Bornea in the East India: The King of that vast Region (although he be a Prince of mighty unlimitable Potency, for Territories, Men, Arms, Ammunition, Artillery and Money) yet the safest and chiefest trusty guard for his person, is a Regiment of Dogs, those Dogs are his only Lifeguard, in whose serviceable fidelity, his Majestical sequrity doth totally consist. This Canicular allusion, is not impertinent to my following, or subsequent interlocution. For though a man hath not the shape or appetite of a Dog, yet no man hath cause to be ashamed to imitate a Dog in fidelity to his Master. Call to your remembrance (I humbly beseech you) that the Reverend Preachers, and Learned writers of eloquent persuasive Pamphlets, and weekly news have not played the parts of dumb Dogs, but with their vigilant and violent barking, snarling and byteing, they have (with an Vlissean emulation and imitation, been more powerful, than the strongest Ajaxian Army or Sword in the gaining of the seavenfold shield, and divine tempored Armour of the most valiant Achilles with his multitude of Myrmidons.  
It is apparent that had it not been for the perpetual supportation, that this Parliament hath had, by the happy means of those famous Lecturers, and Learned Writers, the King's party had long since prevailed, and the Protestant Religion had flourished and been maintained amongst us, in spite of our teeth. But they, (and none but they are the chief Props, Pillars, Ministers, and Instruments, that have both built, framed, erected, and upheld, the unparallelled Geometrical fabric of all the Mighty unexampled achievements, which (to our lasting renown) we have accomplished, and may happily proceed in: for these men, have not only fully engrafted the People, with a constant belief of us, that our consultations are unerrible, our judgements infallible, our decrees unalterable, our opinions immutable, our power impregnable, our force invincible, and all our Actions unquestionable; by which means, they have continually furnished us, with means and maintenance defensive and offensive, of Men, Money, Shipping, of all the King's Houses, Strengths, fortresses, and Revenues, and finally of any thing, and all things whereby we subsist.  
Amongst the many and numerous Multiplicity of those famous Authors, the industrious and acute Mercurius Britanicus, hath been, and is the Atlas of our foundation, and the Top-galiant of our felicity. Who hath so vehemently reviled the King, who hath more contumeliously railed against the Queen, who hath more Learnedly scandalised the Peers, who hath more Religiously abused the Protestant Religion, who hath more piously scandaled the common-prayer-book, who hath so Reverendly vilified the Clergy, who hath more violently slandered the King's Servants, who hath more Wittily bejeered the Cavaliers, and who hath more prettily run the hazard of a Gregorian danger than he? And all these services he hath done for us, for which my opinion is, that we cannot do too much for him.  
I must confess the rest have done well, but as there are degrees (as our Logicians say) of Good, Better, and Best, so that though Mr Booker, M. Nye, and M. Lilly, have done most Excellent-ly, Astronomical-lye, Astrologicallye, Mathematical-lye, and Chronological lie, in their infusing into the People's credulity, the predictions and pretendings, of Auspicious and Parliamental Proditorious Events; wherein if the Stars and Planets have either not kept touch (or promise with them) or that betwixt the Constellations, Revolutions, and Influences of the Celestial Orbs, Spheres, and Hemispheres, and the Terrestrial Globe there is such distance, that intelligence may fail, messengers may meet with some Malevolent disasters, Letters may be intercepted, and many impediments may chance to alter and change the conclusions, that such Astronomers do ground upon, as it did with M. Booker, when his pretences failed in the taking of Oxford, with two Armies the 29. of May last 1644. although all our Labour was not then lost, for with the dropping down of no more than 700 of our men, we saw Oxford, and Conquered a Mill four miles from thence, and we also took two Carts, laden with Bedsteads, joyn'd-stooles, Washing-bolles, and Bucking-tubbs. Concerning Captain George Wither, it cannot be denied, but he hath approved himself to be the Cream of Wisdom, the Lees of Wit, the Pith, Marrow, and Marrowbone of Invention, for our sakes, cause, and defence, he hath mounted the two topped Parnassus, pumped at Helicon, and drained the Thespian fountain, he hath Ransacked the Muses, rifled the Furies, Plundered the Devil, and Raked Hell, and all this he hath done for our services (as his Learned volume called Campo-Musae will testify. As for the Scout, the Scottish Dove, the Post, Mercurius Civicus, the diurnals, Occurrences, Weekly News Books, and other Aids, Helps, and Assistants, It must be gratefully acknowledged, that their Labours have been prevalent, against the Malevolent, though not Equivalent to the most meritorious Mercurius Britanicus.  
What though Tailor the Thamesissian Aquatican, Humidian, Hydromantian & Hidropican Poet, hath smatteringly sputtered at his fame, & most Amaritudanically dissected & Embowelled his Reputation; Though many of our Malignants, have mounted their Penns against him, as we have done our Cannons (or the Kings) against we know (and know not) whom: yet nevertheless, Hope's Anchor hath Moared him, Fortitudes Pillar hath supported him, Perseverance hath spurred him forward, Opportunity hath been his Handmaid, and old Time (himself) hath not disdained to wait on him, as a Page, or (as the Proverb says) a TO Anthony Pig. So that for our Service, Honour, and dignity, he hath been more violent and vigilant, than all the rest of the Pack; Therefore to put an end, to finish, to make a conclusion, to come to a full point, to shut up all with a Period, and briefly (to avoid Tautology) in a word, to speak faithfully and fully, as I said before, of the King of Bonea's Guard of Dogs, so all those  Worthies, have been, and are a diligent, watchful, and strong guard, for the defence and support of all that we have attempted or accomplished against the King, the Queen, the Nobility, Gentry, Commons, and all that do either adhere, affect, aid, assist, serve, honour or obey, any of the Malignant's cause, Person or Party, amongst which Mercurius Britanicus hath been the most unmatchable, bold, brave, barking, brawling, biting Bandog, and deserves to be held as Captain of all our Guards of Writers, Speakers, Preachers, either for Palpit, Pen, Press, Print, or, (as a man may say) and so forth.  
I will not derogate from the Learned, or detract, diminish, or extenuate, the worths of other famous men in this kind, especially Mr Henry Burton, and Mr William Prinne, they have acted their parts Tragicomically, and have (for the propogation of our matchless and unexemplified Herculean Labours) most Lawfully and Worthily, ascended to fame's Pillar, I, but though these grave Solons, and Reverend Renowned Annaxagor-Asses, have unanimously, jointly, and severally done us services, beyond all Guerdon, yet for as much as they are in a disconcordance, a disunion betwixt themselves, a disparity of opinions, or (to avoid tediousness) a kind of a contention.  
For the much more than nine times most Reverend Mr Burton, he is elevated into the Heroic Humour, and inspired with the all commanding spirit of Pompeius Magnus, who would have no Equal; and Mr Prinne, is of the milder Majestic opinion of Caesar, to allow equals, but no superiors. The one will be Dominus Factotum, a Noun Substantive, or a Substantial Independent, to command, & not to be countermanded; The other is possessed, that the Parochial Presbytery is more justly equal, and may better spin out these our gainful distractions, and wove out the War many a fair year (that we be not forced to a Peace against our wills.) Thus these two, or this Brace of our Main Pillars, can neither agree, nor fall together by the Ears.  
To Return from whence I have digresed (Mercurius Britanicus) whose merits I have partly showed, how he was vilified in this Honourable Assembly, I need not to repeat, for his services I think him worthy of 2000 l per annum out of the Public Faith's next Edition, or else (your grave wisdom's, may take into your considerations, that he is an able Gentleman, and as capable to be made Lord keeper of our new Great Seal as myself, or else he can perform and execute the office of the Master of the Rolls, as sufficiently as Mr Speaker (without disparagement) and so I leave him and his deserts to your wisdoms Honourable disposal, and I also leave Sir Benjamin Ruddyard (who so bodily affronted and calumniated Mercurius Britanicus) to your just and unerring censures.  
At the end, conclusion, or Catastrophe of this speech, the whole house was in a general pause or silence, each of them Raped, or (as it were transported with an ecstasy) struck with a sudden Admiration, at the composure, delivery, accant, cadence, emphasis, utterance, volubility, eloquence, elocution, and ornated phrase or stile, of the Learned Sergeant, that at last, they all were pleased (after some particular favourable coughs and hums) to applaud him with a respective venerable general Hum, (in token of Approbation) and withal clapping their hands (with an unanimous acclamation) they gave such a shout that the noise was heard, from Westminster to Wapping, and Saint Thomas a waterings, and when all was ended, the old Knight (Sir Ben. Rud.) was confined to his Chamber, and Mercurius Britanicus his cause, was referred to an afternoon-Committee.  
FINIS.