Youth's Behaviour, OR DECENCY IN CONVERSATION AMONGST MEN. Composed in French by grave persons for the Use and benefit of their YOUTH. Now newly turned into English BY FRANCIS HAWKINS. The fourth Edition, with the Addition of Twenty six new Precepts, (which are marked thus ⋆) LONDON, Printed by W. Wilson for W. Lee: and are to be sold at the Turks-head near the Mitre Tavern in Fleetstreet. 1646. To the READER. GENTLE YOUTH, Think it not amiss to peruse this Piece, yet connive at the Style: for it hath need thereof, since wrought by an uncouth & rough File of one in green years; as being aged under eight. Hence, worthy Reader, show not thyself tootoo rigid a Censurer. This his version is little disguised, and therefore likely will it appear to thee much imperfect. It ought to be his own, or why under the Title is his name written? Peradventure thou wilt say, what is it to me? yet hear: Such is it really, as that I presume the Author may therein be clearly seen to be rendered faithfully: with this courteously be thou satisfied. This small Treatise in its use, will evidently appear to redound to the singular benefit of many a young spirit, to whom solely, and purposely it is addressed. Pass it therefore without mistake, and candidly. In laudem Authoris. THough here be wonder when 'tis known, A Child should make this work his own, (Since he that can translate and please, Must needs command two Languages:) Yet this is nothing to the rest Of treasure, which this little Chest Contains, and will in time break forth To call just Volumen of his worth. If thus, a Branch! what will he be When he is grown to be a Tree? So glorious in the bud, let men Look for th' Hesperides again, And gather fruit, nor think't unfit, A Child should teach the world more wit. J. S. The Contents. CHAP. I. General and mixed precepts as touching civility amongst men. Pag. 1 CHAP. II. Of the first duties and Ceremonies in conversation. pag. 10. CAAP. III. Of the fashion of quailfying, or titl'ing of persons to whom one speaketh; to advise them, to break a jest. pag. 19 CHAP. IV. Of , and arraying the body. p. 23 CHAP. V Of walking, be it alone, or in company. pag. 25 CHAP. VI Of discourse. p. 29 CHAP. II. Of Carriage at the Table. pag. 42. Youth's Behaviour, OR DECENCY IN CONVERSATION AMONGST MEN. CHAPTER I. General and mixed Precepts as touching Civility among Men. 1. Every Action done in the view of the world, aught to be accompanied with some sign of reverence, which one beareth to all who are present. 2 It is ill beseeming to put one in mind of any unclean, or ill-savored thing. 3 Take heed as much as thou canst in the presence of others, to put thy hand to any part of thy body, which is not ordinarily discovered; as are, the hands and face: and to accustom thyself thereunto, it is well done to abstain from so doing, yea, being alone. 4 Do not thou show any thing to thy companion, which may affright him. 5 Sing not within thy mouth, humming to thyself, unless thou be alone, in such sort as thou canst not be heard by others. Strike not up a Drum with thy fingers, or thy feet. 6 Rub not thy teeth, nor crash them, nor make any thing crack, in such manner, that thou disquiet any body. 7 It is an uncivil thing to stretch out thine arms at length, and writhe them hither and thither. 8 In coughing, or sneezing, make not great noise, if it be possible, & send not forth any sigh, in such wise that others observe thee, without great occasion. 9 In yawning, howl not, and thou shouldst abstain as much as thou canst to yaw, especially when thou speakest, for that showeth one to be weary, and that one little accounted of the company: but if thou beest constrained to yawn, by all means for that time being, speak not, nor gape wide mouthed but shut thy mouth with thy hand, or with thy handkerchief, if it be needful, readily turning thy face to another side. 10 When thou blowest thy nose, make not thy nose sound like a trumpet, and after, look not within thine handkerchief. Take heed thou blow not thy nose as children do with their fingers, or with their sleeves: but serve thyself of thy handkerchief. 11 To sleep when others speak, to sit when others stand, to walk on when others stay, to speak when one should hold his peace or hear others; are all things of ill manners: but it is permitted to a superior to walk in certain places, as, to a Master in his School. 12 It is a thing unseemly to leave one's bed out of order, and one ought not to put off ones in the presence of others, nor go out of one's Chamber half unready, or with a nightcap. Let not thy Chamber, nor thy Table where thou studiest, be unhandsome, especially in the sight of another, and if so be that thou hast one to make thy bed, leave it not uncovered when thou goest out thence. 13 During the time thou shouldst study, if thou beest in the company of others, it is not fit to make a noise, or read so loud that thou beest understood by others who study: Likewise it is mis-beseeming to study, or read other books unseasonably, while the Master explicateth a lesson, as also to hinder thy fellows attentions. 14 Hearing thy Master, or likewise the Preacher; wriggle not thyself, as seeming unable to contain thyself within thy skin, making show to be the knowing, and sufficient, to be misprice of others. 15 At play, and at fire; good manners will, that one give place to them who are newly come. 16 Take heed, that in playing thou do not overheat thyself; Contest not, nor speak louder than thou mayst with moderation. Drink not when thou art hot, be it that it cometh by play, or by walking a pace, or other labour: for it is a thing very prejudicial to health, to drink at such a time. 17. It is not decent to spit upon the fire; much less to lay hands upon the embers, or put them into the flame to warm one's self, nor is it beseeming to stoop so low as even to crouching, and as if it were one sat on the ground. If there be any meat on the fire, thou ought'st not to set thy foot thereon, to heat it. In the presence of a well bred company, it is uncomely to turn one's back to the fire, or to approach nigher than others: for the one, and other savoureth of pre-eminence. It is not permitted but to the chief in quality, or to him who hath charge of the fire, to stir up the fire with the fire-fork, or to kindle it, take it a way, or put fuel on it. 18 When thou settest, put not undecently one leg upon the other, but keep them firm and settled, and join thy feet even, cross not them one upon the other. 19 Gnaw not thy nails in the presence of others, nor by't them with thy teeth. 20 Spit not on thy fingers, and draw them not as if it were to make them longer: also sniffle not in the sight of others. 21 Neither shake thy head, feet, or legs, Roll not thine eyes. Lift not one of thine eyebrows higher than thine other. Wry not thy mouth, Take heed that with thy spittle thou bedew not his face with whom thou speakest, and to that end, approach not too nigh him 22 Kill not a flea, or other unclean virmine in the presence of others. And if thou seest any filth on the ground, as some thick spittle, or the like, put thy foot thereon dexterously, if thou canst: if that were upon the of thy companion; show it not to others: but if thou canst, put it off neatly, yet without his taking notice thereof, if it may so be: and if another do for thee, the like office, show thyself unto him with tender of thanks. 23 Spit not far off thee, nor behind thee, but aside, a little distant, and not right before thy companion: but if it be some gross phlegm, one ought if it may be, tread upon it. Be-spet not the windows in the streets, nor spit on the fire, nor on a Basin, nor on any other place where the spittle cannot be taken away, by putting thy foot thereon. 24 Turn not thy back to others, especially in speaking. Jog not the Table, or Desk, on which another doth read, or write; Lean not upon any one; pull him not by his cloak to speak to him; push him not with thine elbow. 25 Set not in order, at every hand-while, thy beard or thy stockings. Keep not thy nails foul, or too long, and keep thy hands, and thy teeth clean, yet without overmuch attendance thereon, or curiosity. 26 Puff not up thy cheeks: Lall not out thy tongue; Rub not thy beard, nor thy hands. Thrust not out thy lips, or by't them, and keep them neither too open nor too shut. 27 Take heed thou beest not a flatterer: for such an one showeth to have little opinion of the judgement of him whom he flattereth, holding him for a simple fellow. Play not with him who taketh no pleasure therein. 28 It be cometh not to read Letters, Books, or other Writings, whilst one is in company, unless there be some necessity, & as it were in passing by; & then also thou shouldst crave leave of the company, be it not that thou art the chief of them all. No more may'st thou touch the writings, Books, or such like things of others, nor go near them nor fix thine eyes upon them, unless thou beest invited thereunto, by him who is the owner of them: and thou shouldst not blame them, or praise them, until one asketh thy advice therein. Also thou ought'st not to approach, or look nigh, when another readeth a Letter, or such like thing. 29 Let not thy countenance be like that of a fantastical, or hare-brained, stern, amazed, melancholic, pensive, inconstant man, in such sort that one thereby may discern some passion, or unruly affection: rather show a good countenance, and pleasant cheer, avoiding too much mirth in serious affairs, and too much gravity in things familiar and ordinary. 30 ⋆ Letoy the gestures of thy body, be agreeable to the matter of thy discourse, For it hath been ever held a solaesime in oratory, to point to the Earth, when thou talkest of Heaven. 31 ⋆ Scorn not any, for the infirmities of nature, which by no Art can be amended, nor do thou, delight to put them in mind of them, since it very oft procures envye, and promotes malice even to Revenge. 32 ⋆ When thou shalt hear the misfortunes of an other, show not thy self gladded for it, though it hap to thy enemy, for that will argue a mind mischevous, and will convict thee of a desire, to have executed it thyself, had either power or opportunity seconded thy will. 33 ⋆ When thou seest justice executed on any, thou mayst inwardly take delight in his vigillancy, to punish offenders, because it tends to public quiet, yet show pity to the offender, and ever Constitute the defect of his morality, thy precaution. 34 ⋆ Laugh not too much, or too Loud, in any public spectacle, lest for thy so doing, thou present thyself, the only thing worthy to be laughed at. CHAP. II. Of the first duties, and Ceremonies in Conversation. ALthough superfluous compliments, and all affectation in ceremonies are to be eschewed, yet thou ought'st not to leave them which are due, otherwise thou displeasest the person with whom thou dost converse. 2 Put off thy cap, or hat, to persons of desert, as are Churchmen, Justices, and the like, turning thy cap, or hat, to thy self-wards, make them a reverence, bowing thyself more or less, according to the quality of the persons, and the custom of the better-bred. So in like sort, it is an undecent thing, not to do reverence to whom it appertaineth, & among thy equals, to expect that thy companion prevent thee in that duty. Also to put off ones hat when there is no necessity, appeareth to have of affectation; in like manner it is reprovable, to observe whether one doth resalute thee: For the rest, in manner of saluting, or resaluting by word; keep the most common custom of the best-trained up. 3 It is ill said, Sir be covered, or put on your hat, to one of more eminency than thyself, as also not to say so much, to whom it is due. Likewise he who maketh too much hast to put on his hat, and he who at the first putteth not on, or after some few entreaties; do not well: and therefore one ought to be covered after the first, or for the most part after the second time; if so that in some Countries, the contrary custom be not received, and among equals, or superiors, who are of the self same house, the inferior may cover himself at the first request. True it is, that equals, at the instant, or immediately after, are wont to interchange a sign of covering themselves jointly. Now what herein is spoken of qualification in behaviour, ought likewise to be conceived, in what concerneth taking of place, and sitting down: for ceremonies without bounds are too troublesome. 4 He who being inferior, or held for such an one, would put on his hat, his companion being uncovered, aught to demand leave of the other: then in good time let him do so; upon condition, that he may presume, that nothing will offend the other. 5 If any one come to speak with thee whilst thou sittest; stand up: especially if the person do merit it, be it that he be greater than thyself, or for that he is not thy familiar, or though for the rest he were thy equal, or thy inferior: and if there be any thing for one to sit on, be it a chair, be it a stool, give to each one his due. 6 When thou shalt meet any one of greater rank than thyself, thou oughtest to stay thyself, yea, and even retire a little; especially if the meeting be at a door, or other strait passage, giving way that he may pass. 7 Walking in Company of the like, thou shalt give them the more worthy hand (according to the custom of the country) in which speaking in general, it seemeth to be the most common use, that the more noble place is on the right hand, the right, I say, in such sort, that he, who doth honour to any other, placing himself on his left hand, giveth him the right. But if three walk together, the chiefest place in rank is for the most part, that of the midst; then that which is on the right hand: and the last that of the left. Yet, in France, for so much as the place near the wall is ordinarily more high, more sure for easy walking, and cleaner, commonly one giveth it to the more worthy, namely, where there are but two. 8 Being with thy equals, be not the first to take the best place: but if one present it unto thee, be not wilful in refusing it: thou mayest well express some act of civil courtesy, showing that thou exceptest it rather to obey them, or for that thou wouldst not enter into importunate striving, than for any merit of thine; at least let it appear, that thou rendrest thanks. 9 If any one fare surpassing others, either in age or in desert, would give place to a meaner than himself in his own lodging, or elsewhere; even as he ought not to accept of it, so he on the other part, should not use much earnestness, nor offer it unto him more than once, or twice; to the end he be not suspected of incivility. 10 But to him who is ones peer, or almost the same, one ought to give the cheivest place in ones own lodging; & he ought gently to refuse it: then at the second offer to accept it, with thanksgiving, and recognizance. 11 In walking to, and fro an house, thou oughtest to observe the same, but it is enough that one put one's self on the left hand at the first, and afterwards continue where one is. Which may likewise be observed, being with ones superiors; yet use the most common custom of the Country. 12 They who are in dignity, or in office, have precedence in all places: but whilst they are young, they ought to respect them who are their equals in birth, or other qualities, although they have not any public charge, if they be much more aged, principally if they have the degree of Doctorship: nay, when they give to them, the chiefest place, they ought notwithstanding at the first to refuse it, afterwards to take it civilly with thanksgiving. 13 It is good manners to prefer them to whom one speaketh, before ones self, especially if they be fare above us, with whom in no sort ought one to contend. 14 Meeting by the way the Bishop of the City, the sovereign Lord, or other person of like quality, it is the duty of each one to do them the reverence which appertaineth to them, staying one's self until they are passed by. 15 For that which concerneth ceremonies, or compliments; we ought to have respect of time, place, age, and condition of persons: and with them who are much employed we must be brief, nay rather we should make them understand by sign, that which we would say unto them. 16 Even as Artificers, and other persons of low conditions, ought not to trouble themselves to use many ceremonies to them who are great, & Lords; but respect them and humbly honour them: so likewise on the other part, they ought to treat with them in all sort of affability, and courtesy, keeping themselves from each action, or sine of arrogancy. 17 Speaking to men of quality; lean not, and look not them wistly in the face. Approach not too near them, and at the least keep thyself a pace from them, or thereabout. 18 Visiting any sick body, do not play suddenly the Doctor of Physics part, if thou therein understand nothing. 19 Writing Letters, or speaking to any person of honour, and quality; thou shalt give to each one the title which belongeth unto him, answerable to his degree, and the custom of the Country: and it will not be to ill purpose to read over again that which thou hast written, to the end thou mayest correct the faults, if any therein be found. 20 ⋆ Strive not with thy superiors, in argument or discourse, but always submit thy opinion to their riper judgement, with modesty; since the possibility of Erring, doth rather accompany green than grey hairs. 20 ⋆ Do not undertake to teach thy equal, in the Art himself professeth, for that will savour of Arrogancy, and serve for little other than to brand thy judgement with Rashness. 21 ⋆ Letoy thy Seremonyes in Courtesy be proper to the dignity and place, of him with whom thou conversest. For it is absurd to honour a Clown, with words courtly and of magnificence. 22 ⋆ Do not thou express joy before one sick, or in pain: for that contrary passion, will easily aggravate his misery. But do thou rather Sympathise his infirmities, for that will afford a grateful easement, by a seeming participation. 23 ⋆ Show thyself humbly, tractable, to thy Superiors, especially to Magistrates, and men in Authority, let thy demeanour towards thy equals be such as may argue thee free from arrogancy. And be thou assured, that gentle affability towards thy inferiors, will fix to thy name the Epithet of courteous. CHAP. III. Of the fashion of qualifing, or titling of Persons to whom one speaketh; to advise them; to break a jest, 1 TOuching the Titles, and Attributes which comomonly one giveth to great persons; it is needful to observe the use of times, and of the Country, and to take counsel of them, who are versed and experienced in such things. Also one ought to take heed in speaking to such an one, that one change not his Title, giving unto him sometimes one, sometimes another, if one be not mistaken at the first. 2 To persons of lesser rank; one saith, you, without thou-ing any body, be it not some little child, and that thou wert much more aged, and that the custom itself amongst the more courteous, and better bread, were to speak in such manner. Yet, Fathers to their Children, untell a certain age, as in France until they be set at liberty; Masters, to their little, Scholars; and others of a like command, seem according to the more common use, to have power to say, Thou, Thee, even plainly: for, what concerneth familiar friends, amongst them the custom doth comport in certain places, that they (Thou) one another more freely; in other places one is more reserved. 3 When a man doth the uttermost he can, and aught, although it succeedeth not to thy wishes; take heed to blame him: for in it, he rather deserveth praise. 4 Having whereof to advise, or reprehend any one, take good heed whether it ought to be done in public, or in private; or indeed, whether it be fit to remit it to another time: consider in what terms thou shouldst do it, especially when he who should be counselled, seemeth not to give hope of remedy to his passed, or future faults: above all, in reproving any one, show no sign of choler, nor speak to him with too high an accent: but do it with all sweetness. 5 Being admonished of any whosoever, and in what time, and place soever; show to take it in good part, thanking him who hath done thee such an office; but if afterwards, being not culpable, it seem to thee necessary to justify thyself; thou mayst do it in time, and place, and with decency, rather to content him who adviseth thee, than to excuse thyself, especially, if he be thy superior. 6 Reproach not any's imperfections, although they be natural. Take not pleasure to make any body blush, either by thy deed, or word. 7 Neither mock, nor scoff in a thing of importance, nor be reproachful; nor also break a jest, in biting like a dog: but if thou deliverest any conceit which is ready, and not too much permeditated, and without offence to any body, thou mayest do well. Witty conceits, and passages of the tongue, ought not to be in base and mis-beseeming things such as are those of jesters: and when so it falleth out that thou deliver some happy, lively, an jolly conceit; abstain thou, and let others laugh. 8 ⋆ Be sure thy conversation be in that point virtuous, wherein thou art desirous to retain another, lest thy Actions render thy advice unprofitable; Since the ratification of any advice, is the serious prosecution of that virtue, For example hath ever been more prevalent than precept. 9 * In writing, or speaking to any deprive then not of their acquired Titles, lest thou seem Censorious of their deserts. 10 * Thou oughtest not too suddenly to be seen a flying Rumour of a friend, or any other. But let charity guide thy judgement, until more certanty: for by this means thou securest his Reputation, And free's thyself of rashness. 11 * Use no reproachful language against any man, nor Curse, or Revile, For improperations and imprecations; will rather betray thy affections to censor than in any manner, hurt him against whom thou utters them. CHAP. IU. Of , and Arraying the Body. 1 BE not too solicitous in setting thy bands, thy hair, or thy beard. Carry not about thee any sweet smell. Wear not thy hat too high on thy head, nor too close on thine eyes, nor in the fashion of swaggerers, and jesters. 2 Untruss not thyself, nor make thyself ready for the close stool in the presence of others: afterwards if thou be to touch any meat, first, wash thine hands: but if it may be, not in the sight of any whosoever. 3 It is a point of cleanliness, and of wholesomeness, to wash one's hands and face as soon as one is up; and to comb one's head in time, and season; yet not too curiously. 4 Wear not thy foul, unsowed dusty, nor old; look that they be brushed commonly once a day. Take heed where thou sittest, or kneelest, and whom thou approachest, for fear that there be dust or some uncleanness. Carry not thy Cloak, under thine arm, like a Braggadoche. If thou layest by thy Cloak, or thy Gown, wrap it up, takeing heed where thou puttest it. 5 For what concerneth ; accommodate thyself to the fashion of thy equals, civil and orderly men, according to the use of times, and places: Yet thy ought to be rather more plain, and grave, regard had to others, than richer and . 6 ⋆ Ever be modest in thy apparel, rather seeking to Accommodate nature, then curious by Art to procure admiration: may give thee ornament, but the judicious will never seek thy perfection on thy outside. And I'm sure if decency be thy only aim, thou wilt be sure to shoulder off the censure of a Fantastic. 7 ⋆ Admire not thyself in thy apparel, for that will so far monstrate thy defects, as thou art willing to seek perfection, in the skill of a Tailor. CHAP. V Of walking, be it alone or in Company 1 Run not in the streets, also go not too slowly, nor with thy mouth open: Move not to and fro in walking, go not like a ninny, nor hang thy hands downwards: Shake not thine arms: kick not the earth with thy feet: Throw not thy legs across here and there, and walking, draile not thy feet after thee: Truss not up thy breeches at every hand-while: go not upon the top of thy toes, nor in a dancing fashion, nor in a stooping, nor in a capering or in a tripping manner with thy heels. 2 Play not the Peacock, looking every where about thee, whether thou be'st well decked, and trim, if thy shoes sit well, if thy stocking be fitly drawn up, and thy other clothes handsome, and well accommodated. Go not out of thy chamber with thy pen in thine ear, cap, or hat; carry not thy handkerchief in thy hand, nor in thy mouth, nor hang it at thy girdle, nor under thine arm, nor upon thy shoulders, or under thy gown: but put it in a place where others see it not, and from whence thou mayst take it out when thou needest. Beware, although thou hadst scarcely made use thereof, to present it to others. 3 Eat not in the streets, principally in the Town, be'st thou alone, nor in company; nor in the house out of season, and in the presence of strangers. 4 Laugh not, nor speak not thou being alone; for it is not the part of a man. Walking alone, sing not in such manner, that thou be overheard. Make not any sign of admiration, as if thou thoughtest of some great business: Also throw not in the streets a stone, a stick, or any other thing. Tread not purposely one the pebble stones, and remove them not out of their places, for it is the act of a fool; Go not with thy head too high, nor too low, nor hanging to the right, or left, and look not giddily here and there. 5 Above all things, if thou esteemest of thy reputation, associate thyself with men of good quality: but if it cannot be, because thou knowest none, or for some other reason; it were better, as one saith, to be alone, than ill accompanied. 6 If thou goest with one of thy rank, take not the upper hand, and amuse not on points of precedence; and having not the place which belongeth to thee, let it not trouble thee, but go on roundly. It indignity he be more eminent than art thou; give him the right hand, or the most worthy place, and beware thou go not before him. 7 Walking up and down an house with one only, if he be greater than thyself; at first give him the right hand, and stop thou not then, when he stayeth; be not thou the first to return; and turn not thy back to him, but thyself towards him. If he be a man of great quality, walk not at all by him cheek by jowl, but somewhat behind him; yet in such manner, that he may easily speak to thee. If he be thy equal, carry thyself so that thou turn proportionably with him, and make him not always the first: Likewise stop not too often at midway, if there be not great necessity: for that savoreth of superiority, & is accounted troublesome. He, in the midst walking with equals, or as it were equals, aught to turn himself, now to the right, then to the left hand: and if so be that they be not equals, let him turn for the most part towards him who deserveth best. Finally, they who are on the side, ought always to turn themselves towards him who is in the midst, neither before him nor behind him. 8 ⋆ In thy walkings alone, express no passion in thy gesture, lest by that means thou shouldst turn thy breast into Crystal, and let others read thy mind at a distance. 9 ⋆ Letoy thy conversation be without malice or envye, for that is a sign of a tractable and commendable nature. And in all causes of passion, admit reason for thy governess, so shall thy Reputation be either altogether inviolable, or at the least not stained with common Tinctures. 10 ⋆ Never express any thing unbeseeming, nor act against the Rules moral, before thy inferiors, For in these things, thy own guilt will multiply Crimes by example, and as it were, confirm Ill by authority. 11 ⋆ Be not imumodest in urging thy friend to discover his secrets; lest an accidental discovery of them, work a breach in your amity. CHAP. VI Of Discourse. 1 Utter not frivolous things amongst grave and learned men, nor any very difficult question or subject, amongst the ignorant, nor things which are hard to be believed. Farce not thy language with Sentences, especially amongst thy equals, and much less amongst thy betters. Speak not of mischances, and doleful things inopportunely, and to the company: In time of mirth, or at the Table, speak not of melancholic things, of wounds, of sculls, of death; and if others speak in that kind, change the discourse, if thou canst, dexterously. Tell not thy dreams, if it be not to thy intimatest friends, when they might seem to be of great and notable presage; to which notwithstanding thou shalt not give credit. 2 A man well bred ought not to vaunt himself of his brave achievements, or rare qualities of wit, of virtue, or of the like; much less speak of his nobleness, honour, riches, or his kindred, if he be not more than constrained; also he ought not to depress himself too much without occasion. 3 It is to no purpose to break a jest there where one taketh no pleasure in mirth. Laugh not aloud, and to the disfiguring of thy countenance, or without subject, only be custom. Deride not the misfortune of any one, although there seem to be some cause why. 4 Speak not an injurious word; be it in jest, or in earnest. Nip not any by word: Likewise one ought not to scoff any body; especially, if they be greater than thyself, although they give occasion. 5 Be not froward, but friendly, and courteous, and the first to salute others: hear, and answer, and be not pensive, when it is a time to converse and discourse. 6 By no means detract from any other, nor speak of things which belong unto him; also be not too excessive in praising. 7 Go not thither, where thou knowest not whether thou shalt be welcome. Give not thy advice, except one ask it of thee, be it not that thou art the best there, principally out of season, and where there is no hope of profiting: and being entreated to deliver what thou thinkest, be brief, and come quickly to to the point. 8 If too contend amongst themselves, take not the part of either, if thou beest not compelled: and take heed that thou be not obstinate in thine opinion. In things indifferent, be thou on the part of the most of the Company, who deliver thereon their opinions. 9 Reprehend not the imperfections of others, for that is the part of Fathers, Masters, and Superiors: thou mayest well show, notwithstanding, that they distaste thee: Likewise may'st thou now and then sagely give some good counsel in time, and place. 10 Stay not to gaze on the marks or blemishes appearing on others, although they be natural, principally, if they be in the face: and ask not from whence they come; and that which thou well mayest speak in secret to thy friend, deliver not in the presence of orhers. 11 Speak not in an unknown language, or in what thou knowest not well, be it not in case of necessity to be better understood: but use thine own natural tongue, as men of quality of the Town speak it; not like the mean sort. especially, take thou heed to utter words which savour of immodesty, although in secret, or to move mirth. Use not homely, and clownish words, when things sublime and serious are treated of 12 Speak not before thou thinkest what thou wouldst deliver, and in the vulgar language. And make not a show of nimble conceits, and clinches. Pronounce not imperfectly, nor hastily bring forth thy words: Likewise utter not thy words so slowly, that thou trouble the hearers. 13 When another speaketh, take heed that through thee he be not neglected by his auditors; and be attentive, turning not thine eyes here and there, nor busy thyself in aught else. If any drawl forth his words, help him not therein, nor prompt him, be it not that he entreat thee so to do, or that it were in private, or that thou hadst great familiarity with him. Likewise interrupt him not, nor answer him, until he have brought his speech to a period. 14 Being in the midst of a discourse, ask not of what one treateth, since that it is a draught of authority; but thou mayst well entreat gently, that he proceed, if thou perceivest that for thee he hold his peace. On the contrary, if any one come on a sudden whilst thou talkest, especially if he be a person of quality, it is seemly to make a little Epilogue, and brief collection of what thou deliveredst, & then afterwards go on with thy discourse. 15 Thou ought'st not to make face, or use any other action of undecency with thy mouth, eyes, or thy hands, to express what thou wouldst deliver; neither ought'st thou to hold thy hand behind thy back, either clasped, are across; for that savoureth of one's pre-eminence: but place thy hands before thee, one over the other, somewhat under thy breast, or under thy girdle. When thou talkest, be circumspect how thou carriest thy body. Shake not thy head, nor move thy hands much, and hold thy feet still. 16 Whilst thou speakest, put not on thy hat, nor ought else before thy mouth. Chew not paper, nor other thing. Shake not thy head. Deal not blows with thy elbows. Stand not tittertatter, on one foot. Put not one leg overthwart the other. 17 Point not with thy finger at him of whom thou speakest. Approach not too nigh his person; less, his face, to whom thou talkest. 18 If thou beest in Company, speak not in secret with whomsoever, but refer it to another time, if so be that thou hast no authority over them. 19 To treat with men at an unfit time, is to do nothing, or rather to anger them with whom thou wouldst speak. 20 Take thou heed that thou make no comparisons; and if any body happen to be praised, for some brave act, or virtue; praise not another for the same virtue in his presence: for every comparison is odious. 21 Be not apt to relate news, if thou knowest not, that for the most part they be true. Discoursing of things which thou hast heard, say not; who told them unto the, if thou thinkest not that he will take it well, What hath been told thee in secret; relate it not to another. 22 Be not tedious in thy speech, reading, discourse: principally when the thing is of small importance, or when thou perceivest that the company doth not well like of it. 23 Be not curious to know the affairs of others: and approach not to that side where one speaketh in secret. 24 Undertake not that which thou canst not perform; but keep thy promise. 25 When thou dost a message, deliverest a relation or manifestation of a business; endeavour to do it without Passion, and with discretion: although it be thou treatest with persons of mean rank or quality. 26. When those that are thy Tutors talk to any body, or other; be thou ware to speak, to laugh, or to hearken to them. 27. Take heed to mumble, or make a noise within thy teeth. 28. Assure not that which thou knowest not, to be true. 29. Being with persons of more quality than art thou, principally if they have power over thee; speak not until thou art asked: and then stand upright, put off thy hat, and answer in few words, if so be they give thee not leave to sit, or to put on thy hat. 30. In disputes which occur, especially in conversation; be not so desirous to win, that thou leave no liberty to each one to deliver his opinion: and be it that thou art in the wrong, or right, thou ought'st to give way to the judgement of the major part, or at the least to the most choleric and peevish, and fare rather to them under whom thou art, or who are Judges of the dispute. 31. Although thou beest bitten, or injured by words, answer not; and endeavour not to defend thyself; but make show to take them in jest, and that thou carest not for them; although others do move thee to defend thyself; for, as the Proverb saith, Each question doth not deserve an answer. 32. Contradict not at every hand-while, that which others say, contending and saying, It is not so; it is as I say: but apply thyself therein to the opinion of others; principally, when the things are of small consequence. 33. Being in company also even with them of thy condition, play not the Mountebank and prattler, but speak with measure, and in due time, having wherewithal to talk to the purpose of that which is handled, and with certainty of truth: For, to speak, or rehearse a thing, not knowing it, and afterwards to excuse ones-self, in saying, I do not remember it well, I know well that I have read it; that becometh not. 34. If any one had begun to rehearse a History; say not, I know it well: and if he relate it not a-right, and fully; shake not thy head, twinkle not thine eyes, and snigger not thereat; much less mayst thou say, It is not so, you deceive yourself. 35. Speak not very loud, as would the Crier of Proclamations. Nor speak so low, that one cannot understand thee. 36. Let thy carriage be beseeming a man moderately grave, settled, and attentive to that which is spoken: to the end thou hast not occasion to say at eve-discourse; What say you? How happened that? I understand you not; and the like. 37. In discourses, walking, hold not back thy companion, as it were by a bridle, staying him at every three words. Approach not so nigh unto him, that thou justle him. Keep not thyself further from him than a span, or thereabout. 38. Be not a year in the beginning of a Discourse, and in certain long excuses, or ceremonies, saying; Sir, excuse me, if I know not to deliver myself well, etc. yet to obey you, etc. and other-like troublesome and sottish drawling, and nice curiosities: but enter readily into the matter; as much as may be, with moderate boldness: then proceed without being troubled, even to the end. Be not tedious; make not many digressions, nor repeat oftentimes the same manner of speeeh. 39 He who hath an unready speech, let him not always take upon him the Discourse: but let him endeavour to correct the default of his tongue by silence, and good attention. 40. ⋆ Speak not evil of one absent, for it is unjust to detract from the worth of any, or besmear a good name by condemning, where the party is not present, to clear himself, or undergo a rational conviction. 41 ⋆ It is a thing very improper, if not altogether ridiculous, to treat of matters about ●bove the capassitie of thy Auditors, for by so doing though thou shouldst purchase admiration from their ignorance; yet, it will procure derission from the wise, since by that means: thy discourse will become common air, and they who hear thee, will be altogether unsatisfied in thy Conclusions. CHAP. VII. Of Carriage at the Table. 1 BEing set at the Table, scratch not thyself, and take thou heed as much as thou canst, to spit, cough, and to blow thy nose; but if it be needful, do it dexterously without much noise, turning thy face sideling. 2 Take not thy repast like a glutton. 3 Break not bread with thy hands; but cut it with a knife, if it be not very little, and very new, and that all the others did the same, or the major part. 4 Cast not thyself upon the Table with thine arms stretched out, even to the elbows. And lean not thy shoulders, or thine arms, on thy chair undecently. 5 Eat not with thy cheeks full, and with full mouth. 6 Sop not in Wine, if thou beest not the Master of the house, or hast some indisposition or other. 7 Make not show to take great delight in thy Meat, or in thy wine; but if he who feasteth thee, ask of thee, how thou likest it, thou may'st answer him with modesty, and prudence, much less shouldst thou find fault with the meat, or procure others or more. 8 Taking salt, beware that thy knife be not greasy, when it ought to be wiped, or the fork. One may do it neatly with a little piece of bread or as in certain places with a Napkin; but never with a whole loaf. 9 Entertaining any one, it is decent to serve him at the Table, and present him with meats, yea, even those which are nigh him: but if one be invited by another, it is better to attend until that the Master or other do carve him meat, than that he take it himself, were it not that the Master entreat him to take freely, or that one were in the house of a familiar friend. Also one ought scarce offer one's self, as undesired, to serve others out of one's house, where one might have little power; be it not that the number of the guests were great, and that the Master of the house could not have an eye on all the company; then one may carve them who are near ones self. 10 Blow not upon thy meat; but if it be hot, stay until it be cold: Broth may be cooled, turning it gently with a spoon; but it is not comely to sup one's broth at Table, it ought to be eaten with a spoon. 11 Smell not to the meat; and if thou holdest thy nose to it, set it not afterwards before another. 12 Besmear not thy bread round about with thy fingers, but when thou wilt cut some bread, wipe them first, if they be greasy. Therefore take heed as nigh as thou canst of fouling thy hands, or of greasing thy fingers. And having a spoon, or fork, make use of it, as becometh thee, according to the custom of the best bread. 13 If thou soakest thy bread or meat in the sauce; soak it not again, after that thou hast bitten it, dip therein at each time a reasonable morsall which may be eaten at one mouthful. 14 One ought not to cast under the Table, or on the ground, bones, parings, wine, or such like things; notwithstanding, if one be constrained to spit something, which was to hard to chew, or which causeth irksomeness, then may one throw it forth dexterously upon the ground, taking it decently with two fingers, or with the left hand half shut; so that it be not a liquid thing; in such case one may more freely spit it on the ground, turning one's self, if it be possible, somewhat aside, as hath been said here above. 15 Likewise it appeareth not a seemly thing, to spit forth the stones of Plums, Cherries, or such like on a dish; but one ought first to gather them neatly, as it hath been said, in the left hand, bearing it to one's mouth, and then lay them upon the brim of a trencher. 16 Put not thy meat in thy mouth, holding thy knife in thy hands, as do the Country clounes. 17 Cast not thine eyes upon the trenchers of others, and fix them not wistly upon the meat on the table & lift them not up whilst thou drinkest, or whilst thou puttest the meat in thy mouth. 18 Cut not much bread at once, and make not too great shives; but of a small, or middle size. Cut thy bread even, without framing a tub thereof, taking unto thee only the crumb thereof; also flaw it not, solely taking the crust thereof. Cut not morsels of bread upon thy trencher. 19 If thou hast bad teeth, in such manner that thou canst not eat a crust of bread, or bread burned, or too hard; it seemeth better to pair the piece thou cuttest; than the whole loaf. 20 It is mis-beseeming to stoop much to one's dish, or meat; it sufficeth to bow a little then when one carrieth the morsel which is sauced to one's mouth, to the end that one soul not one's self, and afterwards to sit up right again. 21 One ought sometimes to look off the meat; yet without gazing to and fro, or wistly looking upon the guests, or them who wait, or on the meat which is before others. 22 In like manner it is undecent to soil the Table cloth; and that which is worse, to clean ones face, or wipe away ones sweat with the Napkin, or with the same to clean ones nose, ones trencher, or the dish. 23 Present not to others that whereof thou hast first tasted, be it Wine or other thing. 24 Wipe not thy hands on thy bread if it be a whole loaf: yet if they be greasy, it seemeth that thou may'st clean them first with a piece of bread, which thou art to eat forwith; then with a Napkin, to the end that thou foul it not much. 25 When thou eatest or drinkest, make not much noise with thy teeth, neither in supping, nor in grinding too hard, nor in any other manner. 26 Suck no bones, at least in such wise that one may hear it: Take them not with two hands, but with one solely, and properly. Gnaw them not, nor tear the flesh from the bones with thy teeth, as dogs do: but make use of thy knife, holding them with one hand, or rather with two fingers, as nigh as thou canst. Knock no bones upon thy bread, or trencher, to get out the marrow of them, but get out the marrow with a knife. To speak better, it is the counsel of the most wise, that it is not fit to handle bones, and much less to mouth them 27 Make not use of a knife to break bones, plum-stones, or other hard thing; also break them not with thy teeth, or other thing, but let them alone. 28 Take not from the common dish, that which is before thy companion, but only that which is on thy side, and also no more than others. And if they be fruits, or such like, handle them not to take the best: yet, if any one eat of thy dish, take no heed what he doth. 29 Put not a bit in thy mouth, until the former be swallowed: let them be such that puff not up thy cheeks notably. Serve not thyself with both thy hands, to carry a morsel to thy mouth, but make use of the customary way, that is the left. 30 Fill not thy glass in such manner that the wine run over, and fall upon the Tablecloth. 31 Drink not with meat in thy mouth; Call not for drink then, speak not then; Fill not thy glass to drink, and drink not, whilst thy next companion drinketh, or he who sitteth at the upper end of the Table. 32 When thou drinkest, gaze not here and there. 33 Drink not too leisurely, nor too hastily, nor as chawing the wine, nor too often. Before and after that thou hast drunk, wipe thy lips, and breathe not with too great a noise then, nor ever: for it is an uncivil thing. 34 Cleanse not thy teeth with the Tablecloth, or Napkin, nor with thy finger, fork, or knife: much worse would it be to do so with thy nails; but use thy picktooth. It seemeth likewise uncomely to clean them at the Table, were it so that the others do not the same, and that it were the custom of the best bread. 35 Rinse not thy mouth with wine, to spit it out before others, but when thou shalt be risen from the Table, usually wash thy hands with the others. For the mouth, it seemeth unfit to wash it in men's presence; and therefore, when water is given at the Table, one ought to wash only ones hands. 36 It is a thing little praise-worty, and now adays almost out of use, to call upon the company to eat; principally too often, and with importunity, for it seemeth that one bereaveth them of their liberty: much less shouldst thou drink to others every time thou drinkest; but if one drink to thee, thou mayst refuse it civilly, rendering him thanks for his courtesy, and acknowledging that thou yieldest, or rather taste a little of the Wine, especially with men who are accustomed to it, and take a denial in ill part. 37 When others have left eating, dispatch also, and hold not thine arms upon the Table, but rest thy hands only on the edge thereof. 38 It is peculiar to the chiefest of the company, to be the first to unfold his Napkin, and fall to the meat; and therefore it is the duty of others, to attend patiently, without setting hand on any thing before him. 39 On the contrary part, he ought to be solicitous to begin in time to provide all, and entertain the guests, and finish all with such dexterity, that he may give time to the slowest to eat at their leisure, entertaining himself, if it be needful, in slightfull tasting meats, or when it is lawful to discourse at the Board, intermingling some little Relation, until the company might make an end. 40. Be not angry at the Table whatsoever happeneth, or if so be thou be vexed, make no show thereof, especially there being strangers at the Table: a cheerful Countenance makes one dish a Feast. 41. Set not thyself at the upper end, but if it be thy due, or that the Master of the house would have it so, contend not mcuh for thy going thither, that thou trouble all the Company. 42 If one read, or talk at the Table, be thou attentive; and if it be expedient that thou speak, talk not with meat in thy mouth. 43. ⋆ Let thy Speeches be seriously reverend, when thou speakest of God or his Attributes, for to jest or utter thyself lightly in matters divine, is an unhappy impiety, provoking heaven to justice, and urging all men to suspect thy belief. 44. ⋆ In all things which are to be learned, whether it be in the contemplation of humane actions, let not precept be neglected: for what at the first view, may seem useless upon thy second thoughts, thou mayst find worth observing. 45. ⋆ Since Wisdom is the perfection of understanding, let Prudence to practise be the end of all thy Science; for the knowledge of Precepts, teaching thee what is good, is not of sufficiency to entititle thee virtuous, no more than thy body in thy soul's absence can express thee a man: Therefore neglect not to adorn thy intellect with knowledge directive, nor be thou wanting in such actions as may truly crown thee happy. 46. ⋆ Content not thyself with the bare knowledge of these Precepts: but when thou hast imprinted them in thy mind, express them in thy conversation; for virtue consists in Action, not in Contemplation. Laus Deo trino-uni. FINIS.