A merry new Song how a Brewer meant to make a Cooper cuckold▪ and how dear the Brewer paid for the bargain.  
To the tune of, In Somertime.  
 

IF that you list now merry be,  
Lend listening ears a while to me:  
To hear a song of a Brewer bold,  
That meant a Cooper to cuckold.   

The Cooper walked down the street,  
And with the Brewer chanced to meet:  
He called work for a Cooper dame,  
The Brewer was glad to hear the same.   

Cooper quoth the Brewer come hither to me,  
Perchance I have some work for thee:  
If that they doings I do well like,  
Thou shalt have work for all this week.   

The Cooper with cap and courtesy low,  
Said ready I am my tunning to show,  
To do your work sir every deal,  
I do not doubt to do it well.   

Then quoth this lusty Brewer tho,  
If thou my work dost mean to do:  
Come to me to morrow before it be day,  
To hoop up these old tubs out of the way.   

And so to make up my merry rhyme,  
The Cooper the next day rose betime  
To the Brewer's gate he took his race  
And knocked there a great pace.   

The Brewer leapt from his bed to the flore,  
And to the Cooper he opened the door:  
He showed him his work without delay,  
To the Cooper's wife than he took the way.   

The Cooper he called at mind at last,  
His hatchet he had left at home for haste:  
And home for his hatchet he must go,  
Before he could work the cause it was so.   

But when he came his house somewhat near  
His wife by fortune did him hear:  
Alas said she, what shift shall we make,  
My husband is come you will be take.   

O Lord (said the Brewer) what shall I do,  
How shall I hide me: where shall I go:  
Said she if you will not be espied,  
Creep under this Fat yourself to hide.   

The Brewer he crept under the same,  
And blundering in the Cooper came:  
About the shop his Tubs he cast,  
To find out his hatchet all in haste.   

Then his cursed wife began to prate,  
If thou let out my Pig i'll break thy pate,  
A Pig said the Cooper I knew of none,  
If thou hadst not spoke the pig had been gone   

If it be a Sow-pig said the Cooper,  
Let me have him roasted for my supper:  
It is a Boar-pig man said she,  
For my own diet and not for thee.   

It is hard if a woman cannot have a bit,  
But straightway her husband must know of it  
A Boar-pig said the Cooper so me thinks,  
He is so ramish fie how he stinks.   

Well said the Cooper so I might thrive,  
I would he were in thy belly alive.  
I thank you for your wish good man,  
It may chance it shall be there anon,   

The Brewer that under the Fat did lie,  
Like a Pig did assay to grunt and cry:  
But alas his voice was nothing small,  
He cried so big that he marred all.   

Wife said the Cooper this is no pig,  
But an old hog he grunteth so big,  
He lift up the Fat then by and by,  
There lay the Brewer like a Boar in a sty.   

Wife said the Cooper thou wilt lie like a dog  
This is no pig but a very old hog:  
I swear quoth the Cooper I do not like him,  
I'll knock him on the head ere i'll keep him.   

O Lord said the Brewer serve me not so,  
Hold thy hand Cooper and let me go:  
And I will give thee both Ale and Beer,  
To find thy house this six or seven year.   

I will none of thy Ale nor yet of thy Beer,  
For fear I be poisoned within seven year:  
Why said the Brewer if thou mistrust,  
Hold here the keys of my best chest.   

And there is gold and silver store,  
Will serve thee so long and somewhat more:  
If there be store quoth the Cooper I say,  
I will not come empty handed away.   

The Cooper went and filled his hat,  
The Brewer shall pay for using my Fat:  
The hooping of twenty tubs every day,  
And not gained me so much as I do this way.   

When he came again his house within,  
Pack away qd he Brewer with your broken shin:  
And under my Fat creep you no more,  
Except you make wiser bargains before.