A Caution for SCOLDS: OR, A True way of Taming a SHREW.  
To the Tune of, Why are my Eyes still flowing.  
This may be Printed, R. P.  
 
 

A Noble Man he Married with a cruel Scold,  
Who in her humours would ne'er be controlled,  
So that he was almost weary of his Life,  
By the cross humours of his froward Wife:  
Although he showed himself exceeding kind,  
Yet she was still of a turbulent mind;  
Husband and Servants her Fury must feel,  
For in their Ears she would Ring them a Peal.   

When any Friend approached the presence of her Lord,  
By this vile Shrew they were strangely abhorred;  
With cruel Frowns and Rail she would them salute  
Th●● they were Persons of worthy Repute,  
All was a case, for she would have her Will.  
And the whole House with Confusion she'd fill;  
So that fo' fear of the heat of her Pray,  
They have been forced to run packing away.   

It was his chance to make a worthy noble Feast,  
Inviting full forty couple at least,  
Both Lords & Earls with virtuous Ladies of high fame,  
Who in true Friendship accordingly ●ne:  
All sorts of Dainties he then did prepare,  
No cost nor charge in the least did he spare;  
But e●re they could to their Banqueting fall,  
Sirs, you shall hear how she welcomed them all.   

When she beheld the costly Dishes of rich Meat,  
This Shrew had not any Stomach to Eat,  
But did cry out, I shall be Ruined at this rate,  
This is enough to consume an Estate:  
Before she any more words did reply▪  
She made both Bottles and Dishes to ●ye;  
Both Friends and Husband she the●● did abuse,  
Ask him how he dare be so profuse?   

Like the Thunder loud, her voice the strait began to raise,  
Which made the Guest to stand all in amaze,  
Who never saw the like in all their lives before,  
Dishes of Meat they lay strowed on the floor:  
Thus in disorder they all went their way,  
Each one was glad they were out of the fray:  
Then said her Husband, did ever Man know,  
Any poor Mortal so plagued with a Shrew.   

Now the next day he to a Skilful Doctor went,  
Promising that he would give him content,  
If he could cure the cause of a Distracted Wife,  
Which almost made him weary of Life:  
Yes, quoth the Doctor, I'll do it ne'er fear,  
Bring her, for now 'tis the Spring of the Year;  
I'll take the Lunacy out of her Brains,  
Or else I won't have a Groat for my pains.   

Then home he went, and sent her thither out of hand,  
Now when the Shrew she did well understand.  
All their intent, she called the Doctor sneaking knave,  
Now when he see she began for to Rave;  
Straightways the Doctor did bind her in Bed,  
Letting her Blood, likewise Shaving her Head:  
Sirrah, said she, I would have you to know,  
That you shall suffer for serving me so.   

Madam, said he, I know you are beside your Wits,  
But I will soon bring you out of those Fits;  
I'll cut your Tongue, and when a Gallon you have bled  
'Twill Cure that violent Noise in your Head:  
P●ay Sir, said she, don't afflict me so sore,  
I'll ne'er offend my sweet Husband no more:  
Thus by sharp Usage and Keeping her low,  
He had the fortune to Conquer the Shrew.   

After some time, he came to see his Wife at last,  
Where she begged pardon for all that was passed;  
Saying, her Fits for evermore she would refrain,  
If he'd be pleased to retrieve her again;  
My former Follies I pray now forgive,  
I'll ne'er offend you no more while I live:  
Then in much love they both homeward did go,  
Thus has he made a sweet Wife of a Shrew.   
FINIS.