The Contriving Lover: Or, The Fortunate Mistake.  
With the Old Woman's Journey to Heaven up the Chimney in a Hand-Basket. Together with her Dreadful Downfall from the Chimney-Top to the Chimney-Corner.  
To the Tune of, I often for my Jenny strove, etc.  
Licenced according to Order.  

(1)  
A Rich Old Miser of Renown,  
Who dwelled within a Country Town,  
He had a Daughter young and fair,  
As lively and as brisk as Air;  
A Spark had got so far in Favour,  
that they oftentimes had been  
Kissing and Clasping, Dying Gasping,  
Lovers, you know what I mean.   

(2)  
The Miser thought the Youth too Wild,  
And not a Match fit for his Child;  
He fearing what had passed before,  
Forewarned him coming any more:  
Further to prevent their meeting,  
and contrivance, out of door  
He did command her, to her Chamber,  
and there Locked her up secure.   

(3)  
When this sad News her Lover knew,  
He greatly discontented grew;  
Resolving by some means, that he  
His loving Dame again would see:  
Knowing the Chimney of her Chamber,  
he got on the Old Dad's Housetop,  
A Letter bearing, words so 'ndearing,  
he did down the Chimney drop.   

(4)  
Desiring that she would next Night  
Take care to keep her Candle light,  
For he intended then by stealth,  
To visit her that way himself.  
This kind News did so surprise her,  
and such Joys to her impart,  
Thoughts of possessing, such a Blessing,  
much revived her drooping heart.   

(5)  
The Night ensuing quickly came,  
When he resolved to see his Damê,  
He then desired a trusty Friend,  
That he would his assistance lend.  
In a Basket he was let down,  
his fair Prize for to obtain,  
Giving him Order, if the Cord stir,  
for to pluck him up again.   

(6)  
When down into the Room he came,  
He welcomed was by his fair Dame;  
Their eager passions to content,  
They Kissed, and into Bed they went:  
Eager to possess the blessing,  
fears and cares were soon destroyed,  
Loving Caresses, and Embraces,  
by these Lovers were enjoyed.   

(7)  
The Miser and his Wife lay near,  
Who did the Tell tale Bed-Cords hear;  
The Old Woman in a heavy plight.  
Cried, Husband rise and strike a Light,  
Somebody's got to Bed with our Daughter,  
for I hear the Bed-cords crack:  
The Miser amazed, soon was raised,  
and into the Room did pack.   

(8)  
They hearing the Old Miser rise,  
Which did the Lovers both surprise;  
The Daughter, in a thousand fears,  
Whips out of Bed, and falls to Prayers;  
Begging God to bless her Father,  
who she thought was best of Men;  
Begging his Thriving, and his living  
to the Age of Methusalem.   

(9)  
He hearing what his Daughter said,  
Returned again and went to Bed;  
And called his Wife an ill'tongued Beast,  
Who did so base a thing suggest:  
The Old Woman lay a while and listened,  
being not well satisfied;  
They possessing, of their blessing,  
than she heard again, she cried.   

(10)  
Then slyly up got the Old Dame,  
And into her Daughter's Room she came,  
She happened to stumble at a Stool,  
Did into th' Lover's Basket fall:  
Up was drawn the poor Old Woman,  
who in the Basket screaming lay,  
To the top he drew her, down again threw her  
whilst his friend escaped away.    

Printed for R. Kell, at the Blue Anchor in Pie-corner. 1690.