A Mad MARRIAGE; Or, The Female Fancy of Debtford.  
Being an Account of one Margaret a Carpenter's Wife, (who to salve up the Credit of a servant named Mary, who had been dabbling with Changed _____ Parsons a Seaman, who soon after left her and went to Sea) dressed herself in Man's  and was Married to the said Mary to prevent the shame of a cracked Maidenhead.  
To the Tune of, Moggies Jealousy.  
 
 

YOu Lasses of London attend me,  
whilst I a true Project shall tell,  
Which lately was acted in Debtford,  
and known by the Neighbourhood well:  
Such things were ne'er heard of before,  
as will by my ditty be shown,  
Nor women's inventions to more  
like to this will for ever be known.   

A Maiden whose name it was Mary,  
at the Sign of the Kings-Head did dwell,  
Who lately we hear did miscarry,  
for her belly began for to swell:  
Her Mistress soon smelled out the matter,  
and took her to task for the same,  
When after some sullen denials  
she freely confessed her shame.   

And said that Changed _____ Parsons a Seaman,  
had been with her something too bold,  
Who Courted and promised her Marriage,  
and by consent rummidged her hauled:  
And how he had left her dejected,  
and unto the Indies was gone  
And she by her Mistress neglected,  
who gave her no ease to her moan.   

She therefore repaired to the Mother,  
of him that had trust up her Wem  
And prayed her to look up some Linen,  
to swaddle the Bantling in:  
Her Son she protested was Father,  
and married they were in the Church,  
But since he is gone to the Indies,  
and leaveth me here in the Lurch.   
 
 

THe Old woman hereat amazed,  
to find a new Daughter in-Law,  
Desired to know when they married,  
whereby her affections to draw:  
And also the Certificate  
she then did desire to see,  
For if that you tell a false Story,  
you lodge not your Bastard with me.   

These words did so nettle our Mary  
she could not what to devise,  
She saw the Old women was careful  
and would not be put off with lies:  
She on the Rack stretched her invention,  
and unto a Neighbour did go,  
And opened all her intention,  
and prayed her some favour to show.   

Says she Neighbour Margot, assist me,  
and hear this my pitiful case,  
I know that you may much befriend me,  
and smother my woeful disgrace:  
If you in Man's habit will dress ye,  
and take up Changed _____ Parsons his name,  
We then in the Church will be married  
and neither of us shall have blame.   

The Carpenter's wife soon consented,  
a Suit of her Husbands she got  
The Wedding-day also appointed,  
when she was to act in the Plot:  
To Saint George's Church they repaired,  
and thereof the Clerk did inform,  
Who soon had procured the Parson,  
that they might be married that morn.   

So soon as these Females were wedded,  
the Clerk he was called aside,  
Then Margaret whispered unto him,  
and said she had wronged the Bride:  
By dabbling with her before hand  
and therefore the Certificate,  
Abundance of kindness you'll do me,  
if that you will it Antedate.   

What is it that money won't do,  
soon answered was the request,  
Then homeward they strait way did go,  
a great deal of my they expressed:  
The Mother of Parsons was joyed,  
a Daughter-in-Law for to find  
The Certificate being produced,  
the Mother was loving and kind.   

Providing all things that were needful,  
her Grandchild when't came to receive,  
And thought herself blest in her Daughter,  
and did all her stories believe:  
Till on a time Margot and Mary  
with some other Neighbours did meet,  
Carrousing full Bumpers of Brandy,  
themselves did discover the Cheat.   

The which being noised through Debtford.  
the Parson soon of it did hear,  
Who straightway acquainted the justice  
and caused them both to appear:  
Who having examined the matter,  
and found in 'em nothing but lies,  
He unto the Round-House did send' unt  
to remain there till the next Assize.    

Printed for I. Deacon, at the Angel in Guilt-spur-street, without Newgate.