A New BALLAD. The Triumph of Justice. Being the Last SPEECH and CONFESSION of Nine Malefactors, and Betrayers of the Lives and Liberties of the Good People of ENGLAND.  

But few Examples here are made  
Of such as have our Laws betrayed:  
The rest that have as ill Deserved,  
For the next Sessions are Reserved.   
To the tune of Packington's Pound.  

I Am glad the happy Time is come, when Justice dare appear in open view. I am blind indeed, to signify my impartial Dispensation of Justice to all the World; but though my Eyes are shut, my Ears are always open to the Complaints of Mankind; and amongst all the Countries I preside over, no Place has so bewailed my Absence as England. This has been the most unhappy Nation in the World. This Place has bred the Monsters of Mankind, and under what Villainies has this brave People groaned for many Years? But now, my Friends, I JUSTICE am returned; and so long as you maintain your Noble English Principles, I will never forsake you: And that you may believe I resolve to establish you upon the firmest Foundation, I have brought some of the Betrayers of your Country to be punished in the sight of this Great People. I have weighed these Men in my Balance, and have found them the lightest that ever these Scals bore; therefore now my Sword takes place, I have brought them to Judgement, and will attend their Execution, and let all the Nation Triumph: for by such Sacrifices Heaven is appeased.   


GOOD Englishmen, Women, and Children give ear,  
Unto the Confesson that we shall rehearse,  
'Tis the dolefullest Story you ever did hear,  
By ourselves writ in Prose, by Friend Bayes put in Verse.  
To be great was my Scope,  
To the Devil and Pope,  
A Slave to Ambition, that ends in a Rope;  
For betraying Fair London, her Gates claim my Quarters,  
Take warning by me ye Supplanters of Charters.   

I cared not for Precedent, Conscience or Law,,  
Bear witness all you whom I have hanged in the West,  
If ever I valued men's Lives of a Straw,  
But could sentence a Prisoner, and then break a Jest.  
The Sword and the Gun  
Left the Work but half done,  
My Breath more destructive, slew Ten for their One;  
For I never gave Quarter where once I did seize,  
The World cursed me for't, but I knew whom to please.   

On the Bench I could roar till I made the Walls shake,  
In Court Ecclesiastic could hector the Church;  
An Evidence too for a need I could make,  
ere I'd suffer the Cause to be left in the Lurch.  
'Twixt the Curtains I got,  
Spied a Child reaking hot,  
Which the Mother ne'er bore, nor the Father ne'er got:  
My Eyes are the Vouchers of what I depose,  
If you question my Eyes, I appeal to my Nose.   

In Wapping at last I was snapped by surprise,  
Thence dragged like a Varlet before my Lord-Mayor,  
Where I had the Honour, in spite of Disguise,  
Out of his small Senses his Lordship to scare:  
Thus much by the way  
Of Caution to say,  
Seemed needful, for those that their Country betray,  
'Twill sooner or later bring hanging about,  
So farewel, and take notice that now my Dream's out   

'TIS Matter of wonderment, how such a Varlet  
As I am, and of so vile Reputation,  
Should all on a sudden be clothed in Scarlet,  
Of Old none but Lawyers were sit for that Station:  
'Tis best to be plain,  
To conceal't is in vain,  
It was to hang Armstrong that thither I came.  
And if you'll know more, give ear, I beseech,  
To the words of Lord Wem, in an Eloquent Speech.   

The Office of Judge, 'tis true, it a Trust is,  
And that you, Brother Hol. are not fit for that Place,  
Because, it is plain, you want Sense, Law, and Justice.  
Dispense with the Laws, we'll dispense in that Case:  
Do but do as you're bid,  
You shall never be chid;  
I may ride Tantivy, but you must be rid.  
Young Jack, will get practice, who at present has none;  
So that I'm to be hanged for the Good of my Son.   

ABhorring Petitions brought me into Play,  
It dubbed me a Knight, and it made me a Judge,  
I resolved for Advancement, I cared not what way;  
And now have Preferment that no Man will grudge:  
To comply with the Court,  
Without Precedent for't,  
I thought three miles Whipping a Progress too short:  
A Sentence that made me abhorred by Mankind,  
Yet was sorry that I no worse Penance could find.   

On Jefferies I fastened, and stuck like a Burr,  
Like a Dog licked his Feet, slunk my Tail, hung my Ears;  
But at last my Patroon kicked me out like a Cur;  
A Misfortune that then cost me many Salt Tears.  
Ye Perverters of Law,  
Before I withdraw,  
Take a word of Good Counsel to keep you in awe:  
Dispenser's with Laws may escape for a Time,  
But Tyburn will never dispense with the Crime.   

SUborners were we, by some called the Pope's Mutes,  
Enriched by destroying of Free Corporations,  
And now of our Treachery reap the Just Fruit  
Who for Pelf made no Bones of dost 〈◊〉 〈◊〉  
Such an infamous Brace,  
Does the Gallows Disgrace,  
And makes even the Hangman ashamed of his Place:  
He grudges his Office on such wicked Elves,  
And could wish for his Part we had hanged ourselves.   

Like Villains abandoning Conscience and Shame,  
No Practice we balked, but could Bribe, Forge and Lie,  
Like Bloodhounds could dexterously find out the Game,  
While a Kennel of Witnesses kept up the Cry.  
To Collogue with the Court,  
Of men's Lives we made sport;  
Old Dogs at Intrigues, but now must swing for't,  
With a Leash of vile Foremen of Juries that follows,  
Whom we then brought to Murders, and now to the Gallows,   

MAke room for such Varlets as ne'er cumbered Sledg,  
The perjured vile Juries three Foremen are we,  
Our Number falls right, and we claim privilege  
T' have each Man his Beam on the Triangle Tree.  
In Verdict agreed,  
Like a true Tory Breed,  
To show ourselves Loyal, made th' Innocent Bleed:  
And after like Miscreants bragged of our Jobs,  
But we must give place to our Orator Nobbs.   

ROom, room for Old Roger, the Scourge of the Nation,  
Through all my Disguises I cannot escape,  
I had better have stuck to my Trade of Translation,  
Than have undertaken to be guide to the Crape:  
I instructed the Raw,  
And taught them to draw  
Good found true Divinity out of false Law:  
Till Preachers and Pleaders came down with their Guinies,  
Which I pocketed up, and then laughed at the Ninnies.   

The Rights of the Subject by me were well known;  
The Frame of our Government none better knew:  
I wrote wrote my Conscience, and Knowledge, I own,  
But with Fools, not Philosophers, I had to do.  
Take warning each Wight  
That for Pensions do write,  
The practice may make a poor Scoundrel a Knight;  
But when you have Scribbled, Buffooned, and Harangued,  
Th' next step of Preferment will be to be Hanged.    
FINIS.