OATES'S Manifesto; OR, THE COMPLAINT OF TITUS oats AGAINST THE Doctor of Salamanca; AND, The same DOCTOR AGAINST TITUS oats: comprised in a DIALOGUE Between the said PARTIES, On occasion of some Inconsistent EVIDENCE Given about the Horrid and Damnable POPISH PLOT.  De Ore tuo Te Judico. 
LONDON, Printed for R. L. Anno Dom. MDCLXXXIII.   

To the READER.  
IF the Publisher had not been too hasty, the Preface, and the Book should have come out together; For the Reader is to be advertised, that the Contradictions and Inconsistencies which are here exposed in this following Dialogue betwixt TITUS and oats, are only a General Extract out of the MASS of his EVIDENCE, without any special regard to This or That Particular Case, or trial.  
It was no hard matter for Him to Impose upon public Justice, for a trial, Two or Three, before he was known, and before he had laid himself open to the World, in so many Absurdities, and Incoherences in Print: But since that gross Discovery of his Impudence, and Folly, He hath Printed himself quiter out of his Title, Dignity, and Credit.  
The Reader is desired also to take further notice, That it is not the Question of these Papers, whether oats spoken any thing True, or Not? But the Impossibility of Reconciling some Passages that do here occur, and the high Improbability of many Others, which is here recommended to the Impartial Consideration of all lovers of Truth and Justice.   

A DIALOGUE BETWEEN Titus& the Doctor.  TITUS 
VErily; sincerely; In the presence of God and Man; as I am a Minister of the Gospel, and Saviour of the Nation; I think I must leave the Town. In verbo Sacerdotis, Our affairs go down the wind extremely. The Pope, Priests and Jesuits, joined to the French-Pensioners, Yorkists, Court-Magistrates, and Church of England-men, have so stupefied the people, that none( ( except some politic Citizens)) but can quietly go to bed, without searching their bed-straw for Fire-balls, or so much as dreaming their Throats will be cut with Consecrated Knives, their Brains knocked out with Black-Bills, and their Wives and Children transported to Compostella by Spanish Pilgrims, before morning.  
The time was, when we could have imprisoned, hanged drawn and quartered, whom we pleased, though never so Innocent, and for what We pleased, though never so impossible or absurd, by Our mere breath and kiss of a Book; not a Man, from the highest to the lowest, daring openly so much as to question Our Veracity, under pain of forfeiting his Reputation, and Fortune, if not his Life, by the force of Our Affidavit.  
But( alas!) The case is altered; Either the Devil, or King of Poland or Both,( I will not be positive) have left us in the lurch; Every one sees through Us; Nay, ( So help me God) stick not, in plain terms, to call us, bloody perjured Villain; Monster of Nature; plague of Our Conntry; Detestation of Heaven, and horror of Man-kind. Well, there will come a Parliament, and then—  Doctor. 
And then, or before, we shall doubtless receive a Reward proportionable to our merit. Prithee what can we hope from any honest Assembly? We have shamefully abused the Authority of the Nation; We have sacrilegiously violated all Divine and human Laws; We have provoked both God and Man to the utmost Vengeance. What can we rely on? 'tis a wonder the very Earth doth not open, and swallow Us alive. We have long abjured all Goodness; We have strugl'd hard with something within us, to shake off and abolish the dreadful Sentiments and Belief of a Deity, a Judge, an Eternity, engraven in our Soul, 'tis true,( alas!) we have found those Characters indelible. Our sacrilege; Our Lusts; Our innumerable villainies, in despite of our hearts, pursue us. The Blood of Innocents; The Cries of Orphans; The hideous guilt of blackest Crimes fly in our face, cleave to our very Entrails, and whether we will or no, render us in a manner Devils to ourselves: And happy it were, if( like true Fiends) we only carried Hell in our Bosoms; But our Folly hath at last betrayed us to public Infamy; As thou sayst, Every one now sees through us: And like Cursed Cain, we bear about us Marks for all human Creatures to know us by. In short, The Gallows groans for us, and it is Thou hast utterly ruined both thyself and Me.  
Let us a while debate the matter seriously: What a strange height of arrogance was it in thee, to swear Me Doctor of Salamanca? as if thou hadst on purpose designed to render my Stupidity and Ignorance a Testimony of Perjury. Why, thou know'st I was never at Salamanca in all my life; nor doth that famous 
See the Attestation of the Doctors of Salamanca cited by the Observator.  University use to admit of such Blockheads as Me to so high a Degree. Thou mightst have remembered whilst I was at St. Omers, the very Boys derided me for my sottish dullness; Yet I, forsooth, must be Doctor of Salamanca. Hadst thou sworn me Muphti to the Emperour of Morocco, it might have strengthened my Evidence against Mr. eliot: But( alas!) neither my Learning nor Behaviour hath any coherence with a Christian-Clergy-man. What could this shame of thine conduce to our Invention of the Plot? Thou mightst easily have foreseen, thy folly herein would make us ridiculous to the Scholars and Students of Oxford and Cambridge: Nay, thou couldst not imagine but that the long Gown and Scarf would give people an occasion to inquire more narrowly into our scandalous Life. What canst thou say for thyself? Art not ashamed to let thy Pride thus over-run thy Wit? Now must I( scorned and rejected by all men of Learning and Honesty) turn Holder-forth, and exercise my lechery, Riot, Forgery and Impudence in a short Cassock at Carolina, and this too at an under, rate, and all through thy Doctorship Sir-Reverence,  
But it is like the rest of thy tricks: Thy arrogance is such, thou canst not contain thyself within any limits or compass. Who but a Mad-man would have fallen foul upon his best Friends? Thou hast vomited out thy spleen, in despite( as I may say) of Truth, Sense, Gratitude, and good Manners, upon the very Persons that first created and supported thee in the Title and Profit of the King's Evidence. By my troth, I begin to suspect the Devil hath got so entire a possession of thy Heart and Mouth, thou art longer thine own Master. What if our present Patrons the Whigs should forsake us; Or what if They themselves should miscarry( as is much to be feared they will) in their Design of a Commonwealth? What course wilt thou take? Whither wilt thou go? Scotland is now clear of the Cargilites, and Ireland is already over-stock'd with the loathsome V rmin of our Trade: Nor is there a Nation in Europe, whom the rancour of thy Calumny hath not provoked to execute Justice on Thee. See therefore to what thou art come: For my part, I tell thee plainly, if I be forced to extremeties, I will follow the example of my Fore-father Judas, and Hang myself.  Titus 
Thou thinkest now to silence me, by crying Rogue first; but that will not do: Since thou art so hot, I am resolved thou shalt hear of some of thy miscarriages. Come, answer me directly, there is no shuffling or lying will serve the turn between Thee and Me; Hadst thou not the best advice Dr. tongue and others could afford thee, towards the cunning Contrivance of our Plot at Lambeth in August 1678? was it nor again and again modelled and revised by Persons of a higher station? was ever Bear-whelp licked over with greater diligence, to bring it into shape? hadst thou not all the Assistance and Encouragement thy very Heart could wish? Did not the Papists lye under a manifest prejudice? were they not despoiled of all ways or means of vindicating their Innocence, otherwise than by a ( morally impossible) Proof of a Negative? In fine, was there any thing left to thee, but bare Swearing and Impudence? Notwithstanding all which advantages helps, props and instructions, what shane and confusion hath thy rashness and exorbitance brought upon our heads! Thou hast foisted into our Evidence such incredible Fables, such gross and palpable Contradictions, such enormous obvions Forgeries, such absolute Impossibilities such irreconcilable Circumstances, such impracticable Chymoera's, such heaps of nonsense and Absurdities, that the whole World, Papists, Protestants, Friends and Foes, cry out upon Us, with amazement and horror.  
For instance: How unluckily hast thou timed thy Plot! How untowardly circumstanc'd it! 
See Staffords Mem.  The whole body of Roman catholics, amongst whom, many at least are acknowledged and experienced by the best of Protestants to be men of Worth, Prudence, Virtue, and unblemished Reputation: These must be engaged by Vows and Sacraments in a Design so Black and Execrable, that God and Nature abhor to think on it: They must hazard their Estates, their Families, their Bodies, their Souls, their All, in an enterprise so desperate and sottish, that none but Mad-men would Attempt it, and nothing less than a Miracle could effect it; And this too at a time when they had no reason or motive to seek a change; They must kill the King, by whose merciful Indulgence they lived in peace. They must wade through blood, to an uncertain Liberty which they already sufficiently enjoyed. They must overthrow the Government, for the Re-establishing of which, they so frankly and unanimously, in the late Wars, exposed their Lives and Fortunes. How couldst thou imagine these monstrous Impostuers should long find credit?  
Then again, what Persons and Parties hast thou mustered into Thy Plot? Those very 
Narrat  Nobelmen, who, above almost all others, had signalized their Loyalty in the Service and Defence both of This and the late King; and who now, through Age and Infirmities, were retired from public business, and weary of the World; These must be the grand actors in thy Roguish Conspiracy. Why man, suppose these Peers had been really engaged in a traitorous Design: 
Ibidem.  who can believe that they would descend so low as to converse with, much less reveal deep and dangerous Secrets to such Scoundrels as Thee? Indeed being, as thou wert, wholly ignorant both of the Affairs and true Genius of any Roman catholic of worth, thou hast been so preposterously rash and stupid, as to impose upon several Persons several Offices and Dignities directly Opposite and Repugnant to their several Qualifications. One, 
Narrat.  because he could seldom go, stand, or feed himself, must be a General; Others, because they had never seen a battle, or Armed Campaign, must be Lieutenant, mayor, and Commissary-Generals; A Third, because an ill accountant, must be general Pay-master; Some again, because they were never trained up in Warfare, nor so much as ever trail'd a Pike, must be Captains, Colonels, and chief Commanders 
Stafford's trial.  Nay, the Jesuits, a regular sort of Popish Clergy, they must sign, seal and deliver Commissions for Military employments; And though all men of Reading, travail or Sense know the Josuits to be by their Vow and institute incapable of Prelacy, yet must They likewise( together with others whose Talents entitled them to nothing but their Beads) be enrolled in the List of thy English Bishops. 
o Ibidem.  How is it possible these gross Fopperies of thine should not at last come out? This it is to attempt a villainy, and want Brains to accomplish it.  Doctor. 
What tell'st thou me of mistiming, misplacing, and wrong circumstancing of things, contrary to known practise, Vows, and Institutes? Didst not thou positively swear, That 
At their several Commitments.  Mr. Gowen Mr. Preston, and others, known by all their Neighbours to be ancient House-keepers and Married-men; Didst not thou, I say, swear, in express contradiction to the acknowledged practise, and Laws of the Church of Rome, That they were Priests; And that thou hadst seen them say Mass, administer the Sacraments, &c. in the public chapels; Didst thou not also swear, That John Smith( likewise a Married-man) was a Lay brother of the Order of the Politiciani, 
Narrat ( an Order in the Moon, out of which this strange Lay-brother dropped down hither; for all the world knows there is no such Order in the Roman Church.) By a like contrivance thou mad'st 
Ibidem.  Twelve Benedictine Monks, Canons of Windsor, whom thou mightst as wisely have made Knights of the Garter.  
And now thou putst me in mind of preposterous Timing, Naming and Circumstancing: 
Irelands trial.  couldst thou find none whereon to fix the murder of the King, but harmless Pickering; a man so remarkably Meek and Innoffensive, he would not have killed a Mouse; A Man who was never so hardy as to let off a Pistol, or handle any other weapon than his Needle; He( forsooth) must be the Person designed for the desperate horrid Action of Killing His Majesty, by the loud shot of a large Gun; In the open day; In the midst of His Courtiers; In the public Park. This grand Engineer, on whose Military Skill and Artifice depended the whole Machine of the Plot, had indeed a Silver Bullet( in complaisance, it seems to the King) but was still at a loss in his other Implements for the Fact; Sometimes the Flint of his Gun was loose; Sometimes there was no Powder in the Pan; and so he continually missed his aim, for which he must( like a School-boy) be whipped, and lastly, have Thirty Thousand Masses,( when he was hanged) said for his Hire. Is not this pleasant matter to be brought before an High Court of Justice, against the Life of an Innocent?  
Such-another of thy Inventions is that of 
Coleman's trial.  Sir George Wakeman's poisoning, and the four Ruffians 
Wakem's trial.  stabbing the King. Sir George must have 15000 l. in all, and 5000 l. in hand for his share; but the Gentlemen-Russians( tho' most of them Persons of Quality) could only be allowed each Twenty guineas, sent them by Coleman to Windsor  
And here also mark how palpably thou hast betrayed thy own Roguery. Thou positively sworest, Thou never wast 
Staff's trial.  Really a Roman catholic, but only feigned thyself to be so, on purpose to discover Popish Intrigues, and by that means Save His Majesty from otherways inevitable Death and Destruction; Yet( see thy prodigious Impudence! 
See Stafford's Memoirs.  at the same time, and with the same breath, thou ownedst thou wert conscious for above a year together of the daily Attempts made by Groves and Pickering to shoot the King; Thou hourly expectedst for several Months the horrid effects of Sir George Wakeman's Poison; Thou wert privy to the designed Assassination at Windsor; Thou knewest the Ruffians were actually upon the place, and ready for the villainy; Thou sawst the guineas sent them for their Encouragement, and every moment waitedst to her the fatal Blow was given: Nevertheless thy Watchful Eye, Loyal Care, Holy Zeal and Tender Conscience would not let thee make a Discovery, though( thou saidst) thou knewest for certain, the Gun was already even at the King's Breast; the Cup of Poison at his Lip, and the Daggers almost at his very Heart: Yet thou never criedst out, murder upon the Lord's Anointed; never calledst for immediate Succour; never warnedst the King of His eminent Danger; never divertedst the Impending Mischief, nor so much as opendst thy mouth to disclose any of these horrid Treasons, until such time as the King might have been killed a thousand times over. What can judicious Persons think of this? Will they not say, Had thy Stories been true, thou mightst and oughtest to have taken the Criminals with their Tools about them: To have caused Pickering with his Gun, and the Ruffians with their Daggers in their hands, to be seized; Thus thou hadst discharged a good Conscience; saved the King's Life, and given some proof of thy prodigious Evidence: But, as matters stand, thou hast demonstratively convinced the world, Thou art either an Execrable Villain, in Swearing such things, or worse, in so long concealing them.  Titus. 
There was a necessity for me to nominate some particular persons, else those who modelled our Plot for us, could not have put it into right shape; and I not knowing any body amongst the Papists likely to commit such horrid Crimes, name at random those who first came to my mind. But Thou, as if on purpose to make all Europe, by the knowledge of its own Innocence, experimental Witnesses of thy Perjury, hast impeached by whole-sale, and pronounced Universally Guilty of the PLOT, most or all Roman catholics, 
Narr.  both Princes and People, not only of England, Scotland and Ireland, but also of France, Italy, Spain, Portugal, Germany, Flanders, &c.( an Affront and Scandal to almost all Christendom. Now tell me, Is it possible that any in their senses should long believe, 
Staffords Memoirs.  that amongst so many Thousands of both Sexes, of several Nations, of different Interests, of all sorts, states and conditions, as must necessary have been privy to, and Partners in thy pretended Massacres, Treasons and villainies, none should have any remorse for so bloody, so Unnatural and Detestable a Wickedness; None Worth, Wit or Grace to reveal it; No intervening Accident; No conviction of judgement; No levity of Mind; No change of Religion; No Temporal Advantage; No Friendship, or Relation; No disagreement of Parties, happen to detect it, for divers years together, till at last Thou, and after Thee, thy other Companions, Bedloe, Dugdale, Dangerfield, &c.( the Scum and Refuse of Mankind, raked out of Goals, whipped, Pillory'd, and one way or other branded with Infamy,) made this grand discovery,( good Men!) out of tenderness of Conscience? Is it possible, I say, that any in their Senses should believe this?  
Then, to second these incredible Lies with greater, thou inventedst huge formidable Armies, composed of 
Narr.  20000 Presbyterian Scots; 40000 Wild Irish; 20000 English Papists, substantial Fighting Men, in the very City of London; a proportionable number in other Counties, the Total, by Computation, amounting to a matter of Two or Three hundred Thousand, Horse, Foot and Dragoons, some above, some under ground,( besides Spanish Pilgrims, 
Ibid.  French, Flemish, and other Foreign Confederates) equipped and ready, most of them within 24 
Ibid.  hours, and all of them within less than ten days time, for immediate Service. These vast Swarms( thou tell'st us) were provided with correspondent Stores of 
Ibid. 5 Jes. Try.  Ammunition, Weapons, Black-Bills, Fire-Balls, Granadoe-shells, Daggers, Screw'd-Guns, Mortar pieces, &c. Now then thou couldst not imagine but that the King's Officers,( unless diverted by the Incredibility of thy Fables) would make diligent search where these Millions of Men, and Mountains of Magazines were: And that, not finding, either by thy directions, or their own scrutiny, the least Foot-steps of any such thing, it must needs bring an unavoidable confusion to our Evidence; Especially seeing all men knew it was impossible these huge Armies and Armouries could be invisibly dispersed, or conveyed away, upon so sudden and unexpected a Discovery, made in the very neck of time when( thou pretendedst) they were to have been used.  Doctor. 
Well, and was thy Impudence less, when thou expressly sworest thou hadst seen 
Stafford's Memoirs.  some Hundreds, and deliver'dst with thine own hands not a few, of Commissions for all Military-Offices, as, 
Narr.  Generals, Adjutant, Advocate-Generals, &c. Divers Patents granted for Dignities of State, as 
Ibid.  Chancellor, Treasurer, &c. all Signed and Sealed ( O Ridiculous!) by the General of the Jesuits: Many Bulls and Briefs for Ecclesiastical Preferments, and numberless Volumes of Letters and packets, containing Damnable Treasons, of all which thou knewest the exact Dates, and couldst tell, when, and where red, to, and from whom writ and directed; Not only so, but thou couldst recite upon thy Fingers-ends the express words of almost every Letter. Nay, thou hadst the confidence ( though a lewd, Beggarly, cashiered Blockhead, and a Vagabond) to affirm thou hadst a 
Coleman's trial.  Patent of thy own, authorizing thee to be a Grand councillor in Civil, Military, and Ecclesiastical Affairs.  
Now, couldst thou not fore-see the Papists would incessantly cry out[ 
Stafford's Memoirs.  Let him produce One single Commission, One Patent, Bull, Brief, or so much as a Scrip of Paper, signed as he pretends; Let him bring some Umbrage of Reason or Argument, distinct from his Bare Swearing; 
5 Jesuits trial.  There were many Thousands of Letters, together with several Bonds, Bills and Writings, for considerable Sums of Money, seized on a sudden in the Chambers and closerts of the Conspirators: Now, if these Men were not surprised, Why did they not save their Indentures and Treasures? But, if they were, How could they preserve their Treasonable Papers?  
The Plotters,( if what oats swears be True) were not very Cantious, or shie of their Secrets: And indeed it is wholly Impossible, in such a Conjuncture of Circumstances, such a Multiplicity of Commissions, Bulls, Letters, &c. but some Original Writing should be extant, and forth-coming.  
Why did not this oats, this Man of Trust and Intrigue, produce at least That 
Coleman's trial.  Patent he said he had to be of the Grand Consult? It would have been of mighty Force to strengthen his Testimony. Why did he not immediately carry to the King, council, or some Magistrate, whilst it was in his Custody, That Damnable Paper or 
5 Jesuits trial.  Instrument drawn up( as he said) at the White-Horse-Tavern, wherein the Confederates stood engaged to pursue the murder of the King? Which Paper, he saith, He himself carried from Club to Club: And saw, and procured it to be signed by each respective Conspirator under his own hand. This would have been an Undeniable Evidence; Especially, produced by a Person who made it his business to discover a Plot, and save the King's Life.] But because( as thou well know'st) there was not any thing of Truth in what thou sworest, nor by consequence could be any thing of solid Proof to make it out: the conclusion at last, though after much mischief and Blood-shed, must needs be Fatal to us Both.  Titus. 
Were not thy Chymoera's as absurd, and in all points as pernicious to us as Mine? Didst thou not in express terms swear, the Jesuits became True-Protestant-Holders-forth, and preached Sedition and Treason in Presbyterian Conventicles? Never fore-seeing or regarding, that when the Government had once found out our Impostures, and accordingly discarded us, the Presbyterians were of all others most likely to become( as now they are) our main Support and Defence. Mark the effects of thy Rashness herein; These very Conventicles are now searched, as the Nests of Jesuits, and Nurseries of Rebellion; Our present Friends disturbed in their Religious Cheats, and their real Designs, Associations, and Treacheries, discovered and prevented, through thy Shams and Fictions.  
Nay, on my Conscience,( if I had any) a body would suspect thou thyself art a Conventicling Emissary of the Jesuits, set on by them, on purpose to embroil the Three Kingdoms, to fix an Infamy upon the face of Justice, and render the Mame of Protestant odious to all Nations.  
Such another Foppery was that of thy swearing, The Jesuits 
Narra.  had 60000 l. a year, and 100000 l. in bank, out of which they made 50 l. per cent Interest; And that they practised in London the Trades of Merchants, Tobacconists, Goldsmiths, Scriv'ners, &c. which Trades they engrossed to themselves and Partners in so high a degree, as to gain an exact estimate of the Riches and Strength of the whole Nation. Now, into what a strange praemunire hast thou here brought the City? If the Jesuits can, and do( as thou saist) upon occasion profess themselves Presbyterians, and at the same time likewise exercise the above-named beneficial Trades: Who knows but all, or most of the Presbyterian Merchants, Scriv'ners and Goldsmiths in London,( for Example, Bethel, Player, Pilkington, Ward, Wilmore,) are really Jesuits? Why may not the King( if He will believe thy Testimony) upon just grounds seize on the Persons and Effects of all the Presbyterian Citizens,( who now maintain Thee) as suspected Traytors, and Managers of the Plot? Especially, seeing thou sworest a Dangerous Matter,( though a lye at both ends) That there were as many 
Ibid.  Papists in London, as might suffice to cut the Throats of 100000 Protestants in it. Now, where and how should people imagine these invisible Swarms of Papists could he shrouded and hide, if not under the mask of Protestant Dissenters? And indeed, no mortal Man can can give a Reason why thy present Patrons the Dissenters are not Papists and Jesuits now, as well as they were when( according to thy Evidence) They 
Preface to the Narrat.  brought His late Sacred Majesty's Head to the Block.  Doctor. 
Why might not I turn the Presbyterians into Jesuits, as well as thou hast metamorphosed the same Jesuits into Fifth-Monarchy-men? The Religion and Interest of the Jesuits are much consonant to the One as the Other; The probability of Complotting dangerous Intrigues; The Trust and Fidelity in keeping each others Secrets; The advantage to be gained by Success,( to wit, mutual Destruction) are likewise the same. Yet thou positively sworest, That 
Narra.  Mr. Strange, Grey, and other Jesuits, meeting with one Green, and Eight more Fifth-Monarchy-men, at Puddle-Dock, and first closing together in Doctrinal Points, they at length combined in a Damnable Contrivance of Firing the City. And mark thy notable Policy here; These Fire-Merchants( as thou call'st them) must be assisted by 50 or 60 Irish, and several French,( besides the above-mentioned Jesuitical Trades-men, who thus became Incendiaries to their own Houses,) They must be furnished with Magazines of monstrous Fire-works in 
Ibid,  Granadoe-shells, and Thousands of Fire-balls, of which 700 were made use on,( though no relics or Footsteps of any such Machines or Balls, upon sedulous enquiry, ever had been, or could be produced.) During the Conflagration, multitudes of Men and Women, ( privy to the Secret) must be employed to ransack and plunder the City, and carry the Spoil of 
Ibid.  Cloth, Plate, Boxes and Bundles, into certain Ware-houses in Wild-street and Somerset-house,( though no such Persons were ever discovered, nor any such Goods or Ware-houses ever known.) Amongst other Booties, they got at one clap, and of one Man, no less than 
Ibid.  1000 ●haracts of Diamonds, which were afterwards sold for 3500 l.( though none ever yet either complained he lost, or owned he had any such Jewels.)  
But all this while( as the Devil would have it.) thou never remembredst what thou hadst immediately before expressly sworn, ( viz.) That the main Drift and Design of the 
Ibid.  Jesuits and Fifth-monarchymen in burning the City, was, during the Combustion, to Murder the King, and make a general Insurrection. Now, who will believe the Jesuits would busy themselves, and employ multitudes of the their Proselytes in pilfering of clothes, Boxes and Lumber, just in the very neck of time, when they were to kill the King; to rise in open Rebellion; to cut all the Protestants Throats; to enslave Three Nations, and manage an Army of at least Two or Three hundred Thousand Men.  
Moreover, if the Jesuits intended to kill the King, &c. How came they to let slip so favourable an advantage? Why did they let fall their Design? A body would think They could never hope for a fairer opportunity. The City was burning; Its Government relaxed; The People all in consternation; The King amongst them; and nothing seemed wanting to complete their enterprise: Yet after all, no Murder, no Treason, no Rebellion, no Disturbance ensued. What will wise Men from hence conclude, but that the Fire itself was an effect of God's judgement; And the pretended Murder, Treason, Rebellion, &c. the mere product of thy villainous Brain?  Titus. 
But I put a Salvo to that Objection, by saying, 
Narrat  The Jesuits were not then secure of the Duke, who about that time was but a well-wisher to them. Besides, They seeing the King so industrious in extinguishing the Fire, could not find in their hearts to kill him.  Doctor. 
Worse and worse; Why should the Jesuits attempt a Design before they were ready for it? Why should they begin an enterprise which they already knew ought not to be pursued? Did the Jesuits set fire to the City, and in the midst of the Flames bethink themselves whether the Duke were secure to them, and whether they had taken right measures, or no? Oh! but They could not find in their hearts to kill the King, when they saw him so busy in putting out the Fire. Mark the inconsistence of thy Perjuries. Didst thou not frequently swear, That the Jesuits accounted it an high Act of Virtue, and meritorious of Heaven, to murder an heretic, especially the King? That they determined, without Pity or Remorse, to cut the Throats of all, even the most Innocent Protestants in England, Scotland and Ireland? That they used to Consecrate Swords, Knives and Daggers for such purposes? That they looked upon the King as a 
Ibid.  Bastard, and traitor to the Pope, and chief obstacle to their Pretences? That therefore they encouraged and hired some to shoot Him, some to poison Him, some to stab Him,& c? And lastly, That they fired the City on purpose to gain an opportunity to take him off,( as thou term'dst it.) But now, when these merciless Jesuits had him in their Clutches, ready for the Slaughter, and all their Confederates waiting for the Blow: just then ( O miracle!) comes a qualm of tenderness upon them, and they could not find in their hearts to kill him. Why? Because he endeavoured to quench the Fire which they themselves had kindled, on purpose to destroy him. This is fine stuff, is it not thinkest thou? and a worthy Subject for an Inscription on the Monument.  Titus. 
If my shame of the Papists Firing the City was absurd and incredible, Thy Figments of Firing Southwark, and Burning the Navy, 
Narra.  were no less ridiculous and equivocal; So there's a double Rowland for thy Oliver. And now give ear to other matters of the same Leaven: Didst thou not swear, That one 
Narr.  John Smith, a Porter or Letter-Carrier, ( a fit Person for a Minister of State) gave Intelligence to the King of France, of all our King's Intrigues and Policies; How he stood affencted for Peace or War, and what daily passed in the Cabinet council,( whereby surely this State-Interloper engrossed all the Trade from the French-Pensioners) for which also he had( as a Reward proportionable to the Grandeur and Importance of his Office) no less than 500 l. per annum? Dist thou not likewise swear, It was plotted by the Jesuits, 
Ibid.  The Emperour should be  told, That the King of England( abounding in Money) had sent under-hand great Sums to the Hungarian Rebels to go on ( as an encouragement, it seems, for his own Subjects to do the like,) in their rebellion; And that a Latine-Letter, importing thus much, was sent by a Lay-Brother,( a proper ambassador) to the Emperour? Didst thou not moreover swear, That Twelve 
Ibid.  English Jesuits were sent into Holland,( because the Flemish Jesuits were not so well known, and capable of acting Treason in their own Country) to inform the Dutch( those States being wholly guided and influenced by the said Jesuits) That the Prince of Orange would make himself King over them. Besides,—  Doctor. 
Stop a little, and take some of thy own Farces along with thee. Did thou not swear, That one Single Jesuit, and he a* Spaniard, had promised 10000 l.( which doubtless he never had, nor could procure) for an hire to those that would kill our King? And that a French Jesuit also( out of a transport of Zeal) had given before-hand the like impossible Sum for the same end? These Jesuits, especially Strangers, are wonderful Prodigals of their money.  
Again, Didst thou not swear, That a certain 
Narrat.  Drummer had Ten Royals of Eight, for carrying some Treasonable lets from St. Omers to Paris? And one 
Ibidem.  Armstrong a Jesuit had allowed 200 l. for the like Portage from Valadolid to Madrid?( though both these Countries were catholics, and thou saidst) Coufederate in the Plot.) Yet, at the same time, thou affirmedst, These, and innumerable others, the like, or worse Letters, containing in exprss terms the blackest Crimes of Murder and Treason, were daily sent from London to St. Omers, Paris, Madrid, &c. 
Ibid.  and from thence also to London, and so up and down England,( though a Protestant Country, and designed Scene of the Tragedy) by the Common-Post, some for Two-pence, and others at most for Eight-pence apiece. Nay, the Jesuits were so careless of their Treasonable Letters, as to 
Ibid.  carry them about in their Pockets, and drop them in their Walks and Divertisements. Was it not pity, that Thou, their Cabinet-Councellor( forsooth) and then also imperceptibly to them, contriving a Discovery, couldst never find, steal, intercept, or discover so much as One of these almost every where obvious Letters? What Inferences, thinkest thou, will Intelligent Persons make from these on all sides so inconsistent Fables?  Titus. 
Why dost thou object to me the Incongruities of filling the Post-Offices; and stuffing mens Chambers and Pockets with invisible Letters of Treason? Thou hast made the Jesuits as lavish of their Tongues, as I have of their Pens. Didst thou not swear, That these Jesuits( sottish stupid Jesuits!) were so regardless of their own Interest; so Mad, Bewich'd, and Infatuated, as to Preach 
Ibid.  in public Sermons, before a Company of Boys,( who seldom keep Secrets, and who might some of them, at least, for any thing they knew, in time become Protestants, and tell all,) That Charles Stuart is no Lawful King, but a Bastard, come of a Spurious Race; And that His Father was a black Scotch-man , and not King Charles I. 
Stafford's trial.  And that His Majesty's Religion entitled Him to nothing but sudden Death and Destruction? Nay, thou affirmedst, the Jesuits were so strangely Impertinent and equivocal, as that, notwithstanding they were certain of one anothers knowledge to the contrary, yet, discoursing privately among themselves, they would often, to no manner of purpose, positively aver, 
Narr.  That Charles I. was not King James's Son, but a Bastard, begotten on the Body of and of Denmark by her tailor; And that this present King was also a Bastard, and endeavoured to rule by the Sword.  
At this rate also thou sworest. That 
Narra.  one Blundel a Jesuit was dignified with a Patent of a wonderful Tenor; First, constituting him Ordinary at Newgate: his Office there being to Retrieve condemned Thieves and Rogues from the Gallows, on purpose to make them Fellow-Conspirators, and Managers,( for want of Papists willing and apt to such Exercises) in burning of Houses, cutting of Throats, and the like wicked and mischievous Designs; Secondly, authorizing him to keep several Catechistical Schools in the City of London: where, instead of receiving, he was to 
Ibid.  give Money,( a Jesuitical Craft) to Parents,( being Protestvnts, for Papists surely needed not to be bribed) to permit them to teach their Children the Popish Secret of Treason against the Life and Interest of the King.  
Again, thou imprudently sworest, That, notwithstanding Mr. Whitebread was assuredly informed that thou hadst made, both 
Ibid.  to the King and a Minister of State, an ample Discovery of all the Plotters Bloody Designs; Yet Whitebread, Instead of running away himself, or advising others his Confederates to do so, 
Ibid.  ordered thee( for sureness to find him) to come to his Chamber; and there the pettish old Man( as if he had a mind to hang Himself and Friends, by irritating one at whose Mercy they lay, and who had already abandoned them,) fell on chiding and beating thee,( poor Child) giving thee three blows with his Cane, and a box on the Ear; After which, ( O Wonderful!) this Whitebread and his Companions still continued so supinely negligent of their own Safety, so regardless of the Affront given, and what might follow this Bastinadoe: that they not only remained in their several Lodgings,( when a body would think it had been more than high time to have betaken themselves to their heels) but one of them, two days after, doubtless to help out thy Information)  told thee, 
Ibid.  Coniers was gone to Windsor to stab the King. Are not these likely Stories?  
But then, for thy quaint Devices of C. R. R. C. Black-boy, Apple-tree-Will, Barley-broth, Mum, Chocolat, Order of Magpies, Firebals of Sheeps Fat, Tormentilio's, and Tewxbury-Mustard-balls: These indeed are so Sublime Notions, such Quintessences of Wit and Art, that nothing under the Degree of Doctor of Salamanca could either invent or understand them.  Doctor. 
What a clutter thou keep'st about a few Peccadilio's whilst I have still heaps of monstrous Contradictions and Perjuries to lay to thy charge. People a long time, some out of Zeal, others out of Policy; some out of deference to Higher Powers, and the rest following the Stream, without examining why? or wherefore? gave implicit Faith to whatever thou imposedst on them; And might have done so still, had not thy Folly, transported by success, become so Rampant and Audacious, that no Bounds or Limits could hold thee. Didst thou not, in the House of Lords, 
Stafford's trial.  upon mature Deliberation, positively swear, Thou hadst now wholly discharged thy Conscience, and declared all thou knewest against any Person or Persons, of what Degree or Quality soever in England? Yet afterwards, finding encouragement, and precipitated by malice, Didst thou not, in the same House of Lords, with an unparallelled Insolence, accuse our Gracious Queen of most Damnable High-Treason? What, in the Devil's Name, made thee thus to Contradict and Perjure thyself, so publicly and palpably, in the very Presence, and to the Face of so Honourable an Assembly? couldst thou not see,( besotted Miscreant) That the Transcendent Lustre of the 
Staffords Memoirs.  Queens Virtue, Innocence, and endeared Affection to His Majesty, leaves no place for Calumny to fix upon? And that the bare charge of so foul a Crime, upon so Renowned a Goodness, is of itself, Independent of other ●ontradictions, more then enough to proclaim thee a Villain? Wretch that thou art! What was it thou proposedst of advantage to thyself by this more than Sacrilegious Temerity? What was it thou hopedst from the Calumniation of an heroic Princess; In Birth and Fortune; In Courage and Constancy; In Meekness and Patience; Piety and Prudence, Superlatively Great? What couldst thou discern in the Fpitome of all the Graces, In the Treasury of all Conjugal Faith and Love, Obnoxious to Obloquy? Surely thou affectedst hereby to be reputed in Villainy the Second of Mankind; and to show all the World, There could be found amongst Mortals, none, but Judas and oats, wicked enough to betray the Life of Christ and the Queen.  
Little less was thy Impudence; Little less the fatal Consequence; Little less thy detestable Villainy, in swearing 
Deposition against the Duke.  Thou sawst the Duke at Mass, through Two or Three several Walls, and as many double Doors, in an obliqne part of a Closet. Why, in the Name of Belial, didst thou give ear to those Malignant Spirits that instigated thee to this Insupportable Arrogance against the Best, and most Accomplished of Princes? What didst thou mean, thus to shame thy own Plot, and by Out-swearing all Possibility, to become an Evidence against thyself?  Titus. 
Thou shalt get little advantage by rubbing up my old Sores. Dost thou not remember how thou 
Deposition at the Council.  disownedst( and truly) all personal knowledge of Mr. Coleman? And being brought face to face at the Council-Board, at a time too when the Design of the King's Murder, and whole system of the Plot, was under examine: Didst thou not there positively assert, Thou knewest him not, nor hadst ever seen him before; No, nor hadst any thing to allege against him, but certain Fictitious Letters( of thy own framing,) no resemblance of which, upon search, ever appeared amongst Coleman's Writings? Nevertheless, about a month after, when thou perceivedst that Zeal for Religion; Hatred of Popery; Tenderness for the King's Life, and Danger of their own Throats, had disposed Men( deluded and frighted by thy Fables) to give credit to all thou saidst: Then, directly contrary to thy former assertion at the Council, thou pretendedst long and great 
Coleman's trial.  intimacy with this same Coleman.( Fair, Tall, Don John himself was no better known to thee at Madrid, then thou wast to Coleman at London.) Thou chargedst him also, 
Ibid.  to have been privy and aiding to the intended Assassination of His Majesty at Windsor; To have consented to the shooting of the King by Groves and Pickering, and to the poisoning of Him by Sir G. Wakeman; To have been at certain Treasonable Consults at the Savoy in August,( when indeed Coleman was in Warwickshire;) To have remitted into Ireland 200000 l.( stolen, I warrant, by the Jesuits at the firing of London, and sent over together with the 40000 
Ibid.  Black-Bills; From whence else can people imagine so vast a Treasure should arise? or how be privately remitted into Ireland? for carrying on the Rebellion.  
Well; But did not Coleman's Letters and Writings, containing real matters offensive to the State, and for which he suffered, put such a varnish upon my Forgeries, that his 
Ibid.  Projects and my Impostures were promiscuously taken for the same thing? Believe me, the finding of those Letters, and the 
Hills, &c. Try.  Death of Sir Edmondbury Godfrey, happening both during the Sessions of a favourable Parliament, were the luckiest Jobbs we ever had, since our first commencing Swearing-Masters.  Titus. 
The more thou stirr'st in defence of thy Villainy, the worse it will stink. Those very 
Stafford's Memoirs.  Writings of Coleman, however in themselves offensive to the State, were yet so far from confirming a Plot, such as thou pretendedst to discover, that they directly evince the contrary; For the whole Subject and Context of the Letters, bear a plain and open face of what the Author designed; And the Writer was a Person so qualified and circumstanced, as that, had there been a Plot, he would in all likelihood have been a main Engine and Contriver of it; Nevertheless, there is not one single word or syllable in them, from whence may be drawn any rational Inference favourable, but rather, every Period candidly understood, in diameter opposite and destructive to thy Chymaera's: The substance of those Letters being only some over-weening Conceits and Policies of an Aspiring Man, willing to be Great, or at least to be thought so; and desiring, perhaps, in some measure, a Liberty of Conscience, without Confronting, much less Destroying the King or Government, as thou wickedly forgedst; wherein also( as far as appears by the Letters) he was no wise seconded by the Papists in general, nor much countenanced by those whose favour he seemed to affect; So that, upon the whole matter, Coleman's Writings, Proclamations and Intrigues, are rather( as is said before a manifest Vindication of the Papists Innocence, than any Proof or Conviction of a Popish-Plot. In short, what connexion is there between an Universal Combination of all Papists, to Murder the King, to Introduce French-Armies, to cut all the Protestant Throats in the Three Kingdoms: And an imaginary fancy of one private Person, to procure the King Money, to work an Alliance with France, and dispose the Parliament to a Moderation on account of Religion? The first is the sum of thy Hellish Plot; The second, the scope and purport of Coleman's unwarrantable Writings and Letters.  
And, as for the Death of Sir Edmundbury Godfrey; Our Brother Prance himself( the Chief Evidence) hath spoiled all our 
On the Annivers. of Q. Eliz.  triumphs and Pageantry on that score, with his 
Hills, &c. trial.  many Self-contradictions; His absurd and impossible Circumstances; His Imprecations and Execrations over and over before the 
Deposit. at Council.  King and Council, pro& con to the same thing; His 
Observat.  Silver-Tankards and Brass-Screws; His Sham-cauterizing of 
The D's Picture at Guild-hall.  Pictures; His 
observe.  Oaths and Blasphemies; His Sacraments and God-damn-me's. As if he designed to render himself Detestable and Infamous, on purpose to make voided his Testimony, and clear the Papists of that Imputation.  Doctor. 
Now stand fair, and let me be Plaintiff. How could it be possible, but that thy rank Perjuries should at last be detected: seeing thou didst so desperately run on, without Fear or Wit; never regarding either Time, Place, Matter, Manner, or Persons; when, where, what, how, or against whom thou sworest? didst thou not aver, Thou sawst Mr. Ireland, 
Ireland's trial.  and held'st Treasonable Discourses with him in London, between the 8th. and 12th. of August 78. when as no less than Twelve Witnesses,( and, if required, Twelve times that number might have been brought) Persons of unquestionable Worth, 
5. Jes. Try.  Honesty and Credit, were produced,( in opposition to whom, neither Thou, nor Thy fellow Knight of the Post, J— n, could procure any other than one single Wench, and she a Passant-Evidence) who all unanimously attested they were in the Company and Conversation of Mr. Ireland, partly in Staffordshire, and partly elsewhere, out of London, day by day, and every day respectively, from the 4th. of the same August, till the 2d. of Sept. following.  
Again, Didst thou not swear, thou cam'st over from St. Omers 
Ibid.  about the middle of April 78. to London, where thou lodgedst at Grove's house,( invisibly, for the whole Family attested they never once saw thee there;) And having managed and dispatched in a few days time divers horrid Treasons, returnedst again to St. Omers towards the end of the same month. In direct contradiction to which frontless Impudence, 
Ibid.  an whole Cloud of Witnesses,( and those such whose Youthful Innocence cannot rationally be presumed to have framed, learned, or even been entrusted with notorious Treacheries and Lies) all gave Clear and Concordant Evidence, That they saw thee, lived with thee, eat with thee, conversed with thee, at St. Omers, where thou wert entertained upon Charity) every day, without discontinuance, excepting two days, when thou wentest to Watten) from Decemb. 76 till June 78. After which time, indeed, thou wert,( as thou know'st) for thy two eminent Qualities of dullness of Wit, and Dissolution of Manners, civilly Expelled the college; in requital for which Dismission, and gratitude for past Charities exhibited, thou piously promised'st to be revenged.  Titus. 
Well; But did not I bravely shift off the weight of all these Testimonies, by insinuating the Witnesses were Papists; 
Ibid.  And then, bringing in a Coach-man, a Kitchen-wench, an acknowledged frantic Old Man, and Two others, whom I and my Assistants( especially Trusty Sir William) picked up, to swear, They thought they saw me here in March, April, and May; the only Months, as to matter of Time, could fall under debate?  Doctor. 
Those very Witnesses of thine,( besides their being, both in Number and Credit, much inferior to the others) granting them Steady and Coherent in their Depositions,( as they were not) are yet so far from strengthening thy Forgeries, or weakening the contrary Testimonies, that Thou thyself hast contradicted their Evidence, and They Thine; For thou publicly professedst, That thou remainedst all March at St. Omers, and cam'st not from thence into England till the 24th. of April 
Narr.  New style, that is the 14th. Old style; That thou landedst at Dover on the 
5 Jesuits trial.  17th. and coming from thence by Coach, arrivedst not,( by consequence,) at London, till at least the 19th. following; That thou wert present at a certain Treasonable Consult( with 50 Jesuits crowded together) at the White-horse-Tavern near Charing-Cross on the 24th. of the same April, Old style; And that within three or four 
Narrat.  days precisely after, that is, at farthest, on the 27th. or 28th. of the same month, thou returnedst with the Fathers( as thou term'st them) back to St. Omers: So that, by thy own calculation, thou couldst not have been above 8 or 9 days in Town; and this within, and towards the latter end of the month of April. Now, thy a-la-mode Witnesses depose, They saw, and spoken with thee in London, some in the latter end of March, or beginning of April; Others in the beginning or middle of May. Wherefore, unless thou canst prove,( by 
Coll. trial.  Maberry's almanac) that March, April and May happened that year all at one individual time; or at least, that the latter end of March or beginning of April, and the beginning or middle of May, was all within the compass of Nine days, and those from the 19th. to the 28th. of April inclusive: Thou must confess, either Thou, or Thy Witnesses, or Both, and All, are Perjured Persons.  
Yet more. Thou sworest, 
5 Jes. Tr.  Thou cam'st over from St. Omers with one Hilsley, on the 13th of June Old style; whenas Hilsley himself attested, Thou never cam'st over with him; and it was proved by at least 15 substantial Witnesses, Thou remainedst at St. Omers several weeks after. In like manner, thou sworest, thou cam'st over into England in the Company of 
Ibid.  Sir Thomas Preston, Sir John Warner and Mr. Pool, on the 24th of April. whenas it was likewise proved, by Irrefragable Testimonies, That the birst of these Persons was at Watten; The Second at liege; and the Third at St. Omers, that very day, and some time immediately after. Also thou sworest, 
Ibid.  Mr. Gaven was at London in July: whenas Gaven sufficiently proved,( though the Proof was stisted) He was then in Staffordshire.  Titus. 
But Thou, as if it were not sufficient to be proved perjured by others Evidence, must needs prove Perjury upon thyself, by Thy own positive Testimony. For,( abating thy various undeniable Self-Perjuries heretofore mentioned) thou expressly 
Coleman's trial.  sworest at White-hall, Thou sawst Mr. Turner at a Consult at Wild-house; But at his trial thou sworest it again, and saidst it was at Mr. Fenwick's Chamber. So likewise, thou positively sworest at Coleman's trial, Thou never sawst 
Langhorn's trial.  Mr. Langhorn after April 78; Yet at Langhorn's trial, Thou sworest thou sawst him twice or thrice in July following. That was a Rapper.  
Moreover, thou sworest in several 
Staff's trial.  Depositions,( particularly those taken before the nutshell and House of Lords) thou hadst given an Entire, Exact, and Faithful Account of all thou knewest of any Person whatsoever concerned in the Plot, amongst whom thou only alledgedst against the Lord Stafford, That thou hadst seen beyond-Seas some Letters signed Stafford, wherein the Writer had testified in general his Zeal for the catholic Design; But when afterwards thou and thy Abetters found this Flam would not suffice to draw Innocent blood,( not once regarding thy former Oaths) thou wickedly imposedst upon my Lord new-invented Treasons, never mentioned, or thought on before.  
These, and innumerable other Perjuries of thine own production, are so convincing, they cannot be denied, and so apparent, they cannot be concealed; And however a transporting Fervour might, for a while, as it were hood-wink even a Just Court, and well-meameaning Jury;( for what human judgement is not, in Moral matters, liable to be abused, and by consequence mis-led, by the Malice and Perjury of Impious Men?) Yet at last the cry of Innocent blood hath awakened Heaven and Earth, And the Justice of the Nation; The Injured Government; The Laws of God and Man, Barbarously profaned and Violated by Thee, will assuredly overtake thee, and inflict upon thee Punishments adequate to thy demerits.  Doctor. 
I might still have run on in a Deluge of blood, and continued my Impostures, as it were in despite of God and Man, hadst not thou exposed our Evidence to open shane at the fatal trial of Sir George Wakeman, Mr. Marshal Rumley, and Corker. 
Wakeman's trial.  There it was we lost our Dominion, by thy blind Miscarriages; There it was thy rank Contradictions, Perjuries and nonsense despoiled us of Credit, and rendered us odious and detestable to all honest thinking Men. Didst thou not, when thou wert called before the King and council, and set face to face with Sir George, positively affirm, thou knewest neither his Person nor his Hand-writing, nor hadst any thing to allege against him, but a Letter writ by a third person, wherein Sir George was mentioned? And being a second time cited, and asked by the council, whether thou hadst any thing more whereof to accuse Sir George? Did thou not again lifting up thy hands and Eyes to Heaven, deliberately and distinctly answer, 
Ibid.  No! God forbid that I should say any thing against Sir George Wakeman, for I know nothing more against him? Notwithstanding which positive and public Assertion, didst thou not afterwards, at Sir George's trial, swear, to the horror of the whole Court, 
Ibid.  That thou hadst been acquainted with him? That thou knewest the Character of his hand, and hadst seen a Treasonable Letter of his writ to Mr. Ashby?( which Letter Sir George proved, both by Witnesses and Circumstances, he neither did, nor could writ.) That he had a Commission to be Physician-general to the Army? That he had undertaken to poison the King, and long bartered with the Jesuits about the Price? That they had proffered him 10000 l. which Sir George refused, as too little: but at length they struck up a bargain for 15000 l?( as if, in a matter whereon the Overthrow of the Government, Laws, Liberties, Lives, and Religion of Three Nations depended, and whereof the main, if not the whole Issue, was committed to Sir George's Artifice, 5000 l. could balance either side.) Thus, without any regard either to thy former Protestations, or possibility of the thing, thou sworest and unswor'st, as if thou intendedst to destroy thy Credit, Body and Soul together.  
The like, or worse,( if worse could be) 
Ibid.  Contradictions and Absurdities thou sworest against Mr. Marshal and Corker; For when, like Judas, thou cam'st with a Band of Men and Officers, with Torches, lanterns, and Weapons, to take Pickering in the Savoy, thou found'st Marshal and Corker there in the same house; Thou viewedst them; Thou long studiedst and debatedst who they should be; The Officers often demanded if thou hadst any thing to lay to their Charge? To which, after demurring upon the matter, thou at last positively answered'st, 
Ibid.  I know not these Gentlemen; I never saw them before; I have nothing to say against them. Now, a body would think, after these serious Asseverations, Marshal and Corker had been( as indeed they were) absolute Strangers to thee. Nevertheless, about a Forthnight or Three-weeks after, when, pumping thy Judgement, thou conjecturedst by the place where they were they might be Benedictines, impudently swallowing thy former Asseverations made before the Constables, Officers, &c. thou deposedst, Thou hadst seen them; Thou hadst known them; Thou hadst conversed with them; Thou hadst been bellow-Plotter with them in the Lord knows how many damnable impossible Treasons against the King and State. Nay, thou wert so intimate an 
Ibid.  Acquaintance, Bosom-friend, and councillor to Corker, that he shewed thee a Patent from Rome for his being Bishop of London, and  told thee of great Sums of Money he had to distribute, towards carrying on the Conspiracy. Thou farther assertedst, 
Ibid.  That He and Marshal were both of them guilty of the Plot; Both privy to the Design of Pickering's shooting the King; Both willing enough the business should be done, but only excepted against the Person to do it; And why? Because( forsooth) whilst Pickering( being a Lay-Brother) attended upon the Altar, an Opportunity might be lost;( as if whilst Pickering was employed in so Mighty a Work, the Priests could find none to serve them at Mass.) 
Ibid.  Thou sworest also, That they both agreed to the Payment of 6000 l. out of the Benedictines Estates, towards driving on the Design. ( a likely story, that the Benedictines, who, as His Majesty often acknowledged, had contributed what they were able, to supply His Necessities during His Exile, without other hope or prospect of Advantage, then the satisfaction of having discharged their Duty and Loyalty to their distressed sovereign: should now give All, and probably More than they have, to take away His Life.)  
Furthermore, 
Narrat  thou attestedst, in thy first Depositions against Corker, That he, on the 17th of August 78. actually lodged, together with other Benedictines, near the Wardrobe behind the Savoy; and did then and there engage to assist the Jesuits with 6000 l. in order to the Design. But afterwards, finding by Corker's Examination before the Committee, That he had declared, and could prove upon Oath, he had been beyond-Seas from the 5th. of the same August, till towards the end of September following: Thou quiter renversedst at his 
Wakeman's trial.  trial all thy former Depositions, and sworest, That he went in June or July to the far-end of Germany, and had been with Monsieur la cheese and others at Paris,( the almost direct contrary way) to give them an account how matters stood in England; That whilst he thus remained beyond-Seas, he writ and sent a Letter to London in the latter-end of August, wherein, 
Ibid.  as President of the Benedictines, he gave his consent for the payment of the above mentioned 6000 l. which Letter thou sawst and readest, being( as thou foolishly saidst, but couldst not prove,) well acquainted with his Hand. Now, see how thou hast here embrassed thy Evidence with manifold Contradictions and Perjuries. For First, Corker was never one day out of the Savoy, throughout the whole months of June and July in the year 78. as those who then lived, and daily conversed with him in the same place, have attested; And thou wilt find it an hard matter to make People believe he could be both in the Savoy and in Germany at the self-same time. 2dly. If Corker went beyond-Seas( as thou sworest) in June or July, and stayed there, and writ a Letter from thence the latter-end of August: Thou art perjured in thy first Depositions, wherein thou swear'st, He was then in the Savoy. But if he lived and lodged in the Savoy( as thou also sworest) on the 17th of August, thou art Perjured in thy Evidence at his trial, wherein thou swoar'st, He was then beyond-Seas; So that which of the two soever is True or False, thou art Self-Perjured. 3dly. Thou sworest, That Corker writ and sent that Letter from beyond-Seas, wherein he gave his consent to the raising of 6000 l. because being President of the Benedictines, it was necessary he should give his Suffrage. Now, if Corker was( as thou formerly sworest) personally present at the Savoy on the 17th. of August, and then and there gave his consent for the raising of that Money: What necessity, or even sense, was there, he should a week or ten days after sand his Suffrage by a Letter from beyond-Seas? 4thly. Thou puttest the whole Stress of thy Evidence upon Corker's being President of the Benedictines, for that, as such, the 6000 l. could not be given without him: Now, Corker, proved by Three( and could have proved by Three-score, 
Ibidem.  if the Court had required it) That not He, but Mr. Stapilton, then was, and had been for several years before, President of that Order; So little wast thou conversant in the Affairs of the Benedictines, and so Rash and Headstrong in swearing to matters whereof thou wert wholly Ignorant.  Titus. 
Could any body swear either more blindly to what they knew not, or more falsely to what they knew, then thou didst at the same trial of Marshal and Corker? Thou sworest 
Wakeman's trial.  that Corker was at the Jesuits Consult at the White-horse-Tavern in the Strand on the 24th. of April; whenas Corker declared, and shew'd by probable Arguments, He was that very time Thirty miles out of Town. Thou sworest 
Ibid.  that Marshal was at another Consult in the Savoy on the 14th. or 16th of August; whenas he offered, under forfeiture of his Life, to prove by a whole Train of good Witnesses, He was those very particular days in Warwickshire.  
Nay, thou couldst not contain thyself within the limits of serious Lies; thou must needs play the Jack-Pudding upon the Sacred Bible, and swear matters of Farce and Drollery, with Pies and Custards to make Sport for the Mobile. Was it not a wonderful refined Conceit and Invention of thine, to swear 
Narra.  Mr. Coniers laid a Wager at the Savoy, of 100 l. with thou knewest not whom( in which Wager 
Wakeman's trial.  Marshal went half with Coniers) That the Villain the King should not live to eat any more Christmas-Pies? Surely thou studiedst hard and long at Salamanca, before thou couldst attain to these elevated Notions.  Doctor. 
Thou hadst not best insist much upon my Miscarriages at the Savoy; I shall retort it home to thee. 
Wakeman's trial.  Was it not thither thou cam'st with Rags on thy Back, and Stockens out at heels, to beg sixpence for a poor distressed catholic? Wast not thou there, as well as at other Houses of Roman catholics, turned from the doors, as a Person of an Idle and debauched Life; and this too, as the Devil would have it, just at the very time when thou pretendest to be most entrusted and engaged with the Popish Priests and Jesuits, Lords and Gent. in the Conspiracy? Was not thus much proved upon thee? Didst thou not thyself publicly own it at my Lord Stafford's trial? 
Staff.'s trial.  And this being so, what Inference, thinkest thou, will rational Persons draw from hence? 
Staff.'s Memoi.  Could this oats( will they say) be privy to all the grand Commissions? Could he be employed in all the deep and Damnable Consults? Could he have at his mercy the Lives and Fortunes of all the chief Conspirators? Men stocked with Banks of Money sufficient ( if we will believe him) to raise Armies, and provide for 2 300000 Souldiers? Could this Man nevertheless starve in a manner for Bread? Could he beg for an Alms at the Papists doors? Could he want Two-pence to clout his Hose? Could he be rejected and contemned as an idle Vagabond, by the very persons who thus had put their Lives into his hands? This is such a Paradox as none in their senses will ever believe.  
And, now I remember it, 
Stafford, trial.  tho' thou confessedst( and truly) thou hadst not Six pence at thy first discovery of the Plot; yet ( O wonder!) thou sworest thou wert 
Langhorn's trial.  700 l. worse since thy detecting of it: having expended great Sums on that Account, above what thou receivedst in His Majesty's Service. Prithee how wouldst thou have People imagine thou couldst come by all this Treasure and Riches, unless thou pick'dst some of Sir George Wakeman's 15000 l. out of his Pocket at the Councel-Board, or Stol'st from Corker his Contributionmoney at the seizing of Pickering? Ungrateful Miscreant! Wast thou not maintained in Pomp, Riot and Luxury at White-hall, upon His Majesty's Charges, even almost to Reflection on his Bounty and Goodness? And hast thou the face to disown the Benevolence, by Redoubled Perjuries known to the whole Nation?  Titus. 
Well, But since our Vices and Villainies have excluded us from White-hall, thou hast taken such desperate courses to get Money, that at length( if the Gallows do not prevent us) we shall be forced either to steal, or beg at the Papists doors again. Thou hast set to sale thy Oaths as it were by way of Auction, or Inch-of-Candle; and prostituted thy Evidence to any one would give most for it. How notoriously didst thou act the Hireling, and profane Sacred epithets, 
Coll. trial.  In verbo Sacerdotis; As a Minister of the Gospel, &c. to serve the Associated Brethren with a Cast of thy Office at Colledge's trial! And then, into what a Labyrinth of shane and Confusion hast thou brought both thyself and thy Friend What-d'ye-call-him yonder, in swearing, That 
Elliot's Vind.  Mr. eliot was a Circumcised Mahumetan-Popish-Priest, and had escaped from Slavery by Poisoning his patron! A body would think thy formerly experienced daily Failures should have taught thee more Wit. Thou seest eliot will not permit himself, without opposition, to be hanged, Drawn and Quartered, in compliance to thee; And he being a Clergy-man of the Church of England, People will not so easily yield an implicit Faith to thy Figments against him, as they did against the Papists, in matters repugnant to their five senses. Let me tell thee in short, this Oathing down eliot was a foul business.  Doctor. 
Why, who could foresee, or even dream, That Elliot's patron should come personally himself from Morocco into England, as it were on purpose to detect our Perjury, and confounded our Evidence? Who, I say, could possibly imagine such an unfortunate chance? But thou, independent on all contingency, hast witting and willingly precipitated into ruin the small remainder of our Credit beyond all Retrievement. When thou wert heated and puffed up with Blood, Wine, Sedition and Arrogance, thou must needs, like a Fool, burn thy Fingers, in Roguing, Rascalling and Popifying the Observator; a Person of that Eminent Learning, public Merit, and known Fidelity to the Established Government, Laws and Church of England, that he is as far above Thy Calumny, as thou art beneath His Worth and Honesty. Surely the Devil owed thee an ill turn, when he egged thee on to this Rashness; For what can a Villain, like thee, expect less then fatal, from such an Head, such an Heart, such an Hand, as that of L'Estrange?  Titus. 
There is a certain Antipathy between Virtue and 'vice; And I( as thou know'st) not having one Dram either of Wit, Learning, Worth or Honesty, can never speak well of any Person endowed with those Qualities. But Thou, and thy unnatural Companions, like Ravening Wolves have devoured one another, and so rent and torn each others Testimony, that nothing but a Rope can fix you together again.  
Dugdale's Evidence hath got a Clap, and now his Credit as well as his Person is rotten. Thou thyself( like a Cocxomb) gav'st Him, Turbervil, Smith and Hayns their Deaths-wounds at Colledge's trial; 
Coll. trial.  And they as well returned thy kindness; For as thou sworest Them, so they swore Thee in open Court, Guilty of Perjury.  
Into the like Predicament hast thou also brought thy Two Northern bloodhound, Balron and Maberry; who, tho' formerly well-Gascoign'd Witnesses, yet running counter, together with Thee, in that untoward trial of college, were so Hamstring'd in their Evidence, the poor Curs can now cramble no farther.  
As for the Irish Witnesses,( those of them, I mean, that remain yet unhang'd) 
Several Narrat.  Thou hast spoiled Their Evidence, and They Thine, in swearing off and on, in direct Opposition to each other, about my Lord of Ormond. So that, in fine, I say, you can never combine well together, unless upon the Gallows.  Doctor. 
No wonder to find Incoherence of Parts in a Story divested of Truth. Alas! Thou know'st, I, and the rest of my Brethren, both English and Irish, of the Swearing Tribe, were only a Generation of Vipers, tainted with all manner of Crimes; A Company of Infamous Persons, of lost Consciences, and desperate Fortunes; raled out of Goals, and varnished over with the specious Title of the Kings's Evidence; encouraged with hopes of Pardon for the foulest Misdemeanours; alured by the Prospect of Present Gain; Retrieved from pressing Want and Misery; Transported with Popular Applause; Instigated and abetted by the undermining Policies, and restless endeavours of the Enemies of the Government; To amuse the Nation; to affright honest Men; to seduce the Ignorant; to oppress the Innocent; to abuse the Laws; to injure the Magistrates; to disturb the Church and State; to raise Intestine Broils, and push on a New Rebellion by the Old Methods of Lies, and Clamours of immediate Dangers and inevitable ruin of our Liberties, Lives and Religion, from Popish Invasions, Arbitrary Powers, Dreadful Chymoera's, and Horrid Phantasms of no body knows what. And though we had neither Credibility of Circumstances, nor Probity of Manners, ( Two necessary Ingredients to a good Evidence) whereby to strengthen our Monstrous Testimonies: Yet, whilst the Case was Popery; whilst we gave Attestation against Priests and Jesuits; whilst we kissed the Sacred Bible, and invoked God to help us, according to the Truth of our Depositions, whilst Zeal possessed some, Fear or Malice others, and deference to Authority restrained the rest: We might at last have compassed the Treacherous Designs of our Ring-leaders; And by heightening of Jealousies, raising of Animosities, &c. have intoxicated Mens minds to that degree, as to make English Protestants destroy one another, to avoid Popish Massacres. We might, I say, as our Affairs once stood, have effected this, and thereby have notably served both the Pope and Dissenters, hadst thou not, by thy acknowledged Impious Practices, defiled and profaned the only thing that sanctifies an Oath, ( viz.) Religion, and rendered Protestanism, through thy owning of it, more Deformed, Polluted and Odious then ever Popery could hitherto be represented by any Invectives of its greatest Adversaries. Say,( amphibious Animal:) Say,( Caitiff,) Didst thou not swear, 
Staffords trial.  That though thou seemingly wentest over to the Roman Church, the better to make Discoveries) yet thou still interiorly remainedst a Real, Constant, and Substantial Protestant? Nevertheless, with the same Breath,( O shane and horror of Mankind!) thou solemnly sworest Thou livedst amongst the Papists, as one of their Church and Communion; Thou exteriorly professedst their Faith; Thou publicly renouncedst and abjuredst the Protestant Religion; Thou exercisedst the Popish manner of Worship, Thou receivedst and adoredst the Consecrated Host,( which, in the judgement both of Protestants and Papists, was in thee, so believing, direct and gross Idolatry; Thou tookest( as thou saist) dreadful Oaths, even upon the Sacrament, to pursue with all thy Might most Hellish and Bloody Designs: And all this without any Remorse or Intermission for divers years together. Are these the Actions of a good and sincere Protestant? Is this the Innocence and Integrity of the King's Chief Evidence? Is this the Piety of a Minister of the Gospel? Are these the Symptoms of a Reformed Religion? Or rather, Is there any, either Protestant, Papist, Turk or Devil, besides thyself, capable of such detestable sacrilege and villainy?  
This is not all; Thou couldst not be contented with the sole Trade of Fiction, hypocrisy and sacrilege in the highest Degree: but thou must needs proclaim thyself an Infidel too. Thou hadst not the Wit to keep to thyself the Atheistical Tenet believed in private between Thee and Me,( viz) That the Crucifixion of Christ is nothing available to Salvation; But thou must needs in express terms, in the presence of a numerous Auditory, publicly preach this execrable Doctrine, in a Sermon before the Company of Weavers. What Christian-ears, thinkest thou, will endure such Blasphemy? Or what credit will hereafter be given to a Monster enured to such perfidy and Atheism?  
But stay; Let me see; now when I think on it: What, if after all, there should be such a Thing as a God; A Revenger; Another World; An immortal state of Bliss or Misery? Certainly there will come a time,( and we know not how soon) when we must depart from hence, never, never more to return again.( woeful Wretches!) Whither shall we go? What course shall we take? I fear we shall meet with No Ignoramus-Juries; No Whig-Sheriffs; No Kings of Poland,( though One be lately gone by the way of Holland to the Devil already;) No foul-mouthed Cares; No colleges, No Janeways, Ealdwins, or Curtisses; No Hunts, or Hickeringils; No suborned Witnesses; No blind Zeals, No Time-serving Interests; No State-shams, No Praepossessions; No Jealousies; No Mistakes, No Robert Hogs; to help us out at a dead lift. Every thing that before supported our Credit, will now advance our Torments,( Alas!) Who shall secure us from the Devils, or( the worst of Enemies) our cursed Selves? How shall we shift off our enormous Villainies? Where shall we find Succour, Defence, Compassion, or Mercy? O Eternity! O worm of Conscience! O Load of Blood! Of Lusts! Of Injustice! Of sacrilege! Of Sins Immense and Numberless! O Death and Judgement! O Fire and Damnation! O Divine Vengeance! Who shall endure it?  
For Beelzebub our grand Master's sake do not fright and torture thyself and Me with these hideous Objects: They too often, in despite of my endeavours to the contrary, seize upon my trembling Soul. Come, I see Thou and I must never be alone together. Call in the Varlets that usually attend us: Let us shake off these Dismal Corroding Thoughts: Let us strive to be careless and senseless of the next Life. We are already Sons of Perdition, and cannot be much worse then we are. If there be no God, or Supreme Deity, Wise, Powerful and Just, we are well enough. But if there be,( as in spite of my heart I doubt there is) we cannot help it; Damnation is our Lot, and there's an end. Nay, though there should be such a thing as a Christian Faith and Law: what are we the better for it? Thou know'st we neither believe, nor were ever baptized, and by consequence can challenge no right to the Passion of Christ; And from what other Fountain can spring any hope? We may indeed profess Presbyterianism, as the Religion most proper and connatural to our present mischievous Purposes. But, in reality, there is no access for us to God, Let us then make the best use of our short time. Over Shoes, over Boots. Let us defy Heaven, and drown ourselves in 'vice and Sensuality, till at length, Divine Justice overtake us; Vengeance seizes us; The Devil claim his due; And we finally sink down headlong into Hell: there to Burn, Howl, Rage, Curse and Blaspheme for ever.   

An Anagram, Composed by a Person of Quality.  
SALAMANKYES DEVIL DOCTOR TITUS oats, DISCORD ON A STATE lie will MAKE AL SOTTS.   
FINIS.