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■ **«'^ --tfipewf^ariv

He shot his hand across an' pulled his gun quick as a flash; but

Horace didn't move, he just sat still, with a friendly smile on
his face

Frontispiece. Su fag* 923

FRIAR TUCK

BEING THE CHRONICLES OF THE REVEREND JOHN

CARMICHAEL. OF WYOMING. U.8.A.. AS SET

FORTH AND EMBELUSHED BY HIS

FRIEND AND ADMIRER

HAPPY HAWKINS

AND HERB RECORDED BY

ROBERT ALEXANDER WASON

AUTHOR OF "HAFFV HAWW«," ..tH£ WHIOHT-IMamt "

rrc.

ILLUSTRATED BY

STANLEY L. WOOD

TORONTO, CANADA
McLEOD & ALLEN

PUBLISHERS

COPYRIOHT, 191a

By Small, Maynakp and Company

(iNCOirOIATBO)

EnttrtJ 01 Stationen' Hail
Publiihed, September 7, 1911 { fifth printing before publication

THE UNIVEMITY PRESS, CAMBRIDGE, U.S.A.

1996

MASr thin are wh ri,p,nd u thi cmmonplaa,
m,Hot>nou, call of Duty, and year after year uncom-
platmngly spend their lives on the treadmill of Routine •
hut who still feel in their hearts the call of the open
road, the music of the stars, the wine of the western
wnd, and the thrilling abandon of a mad gallop out
beyond speed limits and grass signs to where life has
ceased to be a series of ogs and—a man is still a
man.

To the members of this fraternity, whose emblem,
hidden behind deep and steadfast eyes, is often missed
by man, but always recognized by dogs and horses, I
dedicate this book, in the hope that for an hour or two
tt may lift the pressure a little.

R. A. W.

JUST BETWEEN YOU AND ME

Reviews are not infrequently colored by a temporary ele-
vation of the critic's mind (or a temporary depression of the
critic's liver), advertisements are not invariably free from
bias; so, perhaps, a few words of friendly warning will not
be considered impertinent.

Whosoever is squeamishly sensitive as to the formal tech-
nique of hterary construction will save himself positive irri-
tation by avoiding this book. It is a told, rather than a
written story; and this is a compromise which defies Art
and frankly turns to the more elastic methods of Nature

It IS supposed to be told by an outdoor man in those de-
lightful moments of relaxation when the restraint of self-
, consciousness is dropped, and the spirit flows forth with a
freedom difficult to find, outside the egoism of childhood.
Ihis general suggestion is easily tossed out; but the reader
must supply the details -the night camps with the pipes
sending up incense about the tiny fires, the winter evenin<.s
when the still cold lurks at the threshold or the blizzard
howls around the log corners; or those still more elusive
moments when the riding man shifts his weight to a single
thigh, and tells the inner story which has been rising from
his open heart to his closed lips for many a long mile
^or will these details suffice to complete the atmosphere

1 ;i! "! ,?' ^^ ^'*' '^^ ''""'y '' *°''^- The greatest charm in

(the told story comes direct from the teller; and, toil as we

will over printed pages, they obstinately refuse to reproduce

! the twinkle of bright, deep-set eyes, the whimsical twist

JUST BETWEEN YOU AND ME

which gives character to a commonplace word, the subti
modulations of a mellow voice, the discriminating acce
which makes a sentence fire when spoken, and only ash
when written ; or, hardest of all, those eloquent pauses ai
illuminating gestures which convey a climax neither tong
nor pen dare attempt.

Happy Hawkins is complex, but the basic foundation
his character is simplicity. His audience is usually a mix
one, men of the range and an Easterner or two, fortuna
enough to find the way into his confidence. Occasionally
amuses himself by talking to the one group over the hea
of the other ; but even then, his own simplicity is but thir
veiled. The phases of life which he holds lightly are €
ploited with riotous recklessness; but whoever would vi
his private shrines must tread with reverent step.

His exaggerations are not to deceive, but to magnify
an adjunct to expression invariably found among primiti
people. A brass monkey is really not sensitive to variatic
of temperature ; and yet, even among the civilized, a pec
iarly vivid impression is conveyed by stating that a p;
ticular cold snap has had a disintegrating eflfect upon 1
integrity of a brass monkey. There is a philosophy
exaggeration which is no kin to falsehood.

Happy has an eager, hungry, active mind, a mind wort
of careful cultivation ; but forced by circumstances to gatl
its nQurishment along lines similar to those adopted by 1
meek and lowly sponge. A sponge is earnest, patient, a
industrious ; but, fixed to a submerged stone as it is, it
hampered by limitations which no amount of personal a
bition is quite able to overcome. As Happy himself \
fond of saying: "The thing 'at sets most strangers ag
each other, is the fact that each insists on judgin' eve

le subtile
g accent
ily ashes
luses and
;r tongue

dation of
a mixed
fortunate
onally he
the heads
)ut thinly
y are ex-
Duld visit

agnify —
primitive
variations
, a pecul-
at a par-
upon the
isophy of

id worthy
to gather
ed by the
tient, and
it is, it is
sonal am-
nself was
[ers again
in' every-

JUST BETWEEN YOU AND ME

thing from his own standpoint. A cow-puncher gets the idee
that because an Eastener can't sit comfortable on a bronco
when it 's sunfishin' or twistin' ends, he jes nachely ain't
fit to clutter up the surface o' the earth ; while the Eastener
is inclined to estimate the puncher an' his pony as bein' on
the same intellectual level. If they 'd just open up an' ex-
amine each other impartial, they 'd mighty soon see 'at the
difference in 'em came from what they did, instead o' the
choice o' their lines o' business dependin' on their natural,
make-up. I once had a no-account pinto which refused to
squat back on the rope, and I rejoiced exceeding when I
got seventy-five bucks for him ; but the feller I took advan-
tage of clipped his mane, docked his tail, introduced him into
swell-society, and got three hundred for him as a polo pony ;
which all goes to show — " (The finish of this is an expan-
sive wave of the hand, a tilt of the head to the right, and an
indescribably droll expression.)

The above is a fair sample of the leisurely way in which
Happy Hawkins tells a story. This is not the proper way
to tell a story. A story should travel an air-line and not
stop at the smaller stations, while Happy prefers to take
his bed along on a spare horse and camp out wherever the
mood strikes him. The reader who delights in a story which
speeds along like a limited, will probably be disappointed
in this book ; while, on the other hand, the reader who enjoys
the intimate association which is lighted with the evening
camp fire, runs a risk of finding some relaxation in taking
another little trip with Happy Hawkins.

R. A. W.

CONTENTS

Chapter Pag«

I The Meeting i

II The Bettin' Barber o' Boggs 15

ni Above the Dust 34

IV Ty Jones 41

V The Hold-Up 49

VI A Reminiscence 57

VII Horace Waipole Bradford 66

VIII A Case of Nerves 76

IX Treating the Case 84

X Injuns ! 93

XI Benefits of Fasting 102

XII A Complete Cure in

XIII An Unexpected Cache 119

XrV Happy's New Ambition 126

XV Tender Feelings 133

XVI Themis in the Rockies 144

XVII Kit Murray 158

VIII Testing the Friar's Nerve -i

XIX Other People's Business i

XX Quarreling for Peace 193

XXI Peace to Start a Quarrel 203

XXII A Progressive Hunt 214

n A Little Glts'-Play. . . . : 222

CONTENTS

Chapter

XXrV Night-Prowlers

XXV The Trade-Rat's Christmas-Gift

XXVI A Contested Life-Title ....

XXVII A Strange Aluance

XXVIII The Heart of Happy Hawkins .

XXIX The Little Town of Bosco . . .

XXX Ty Jones Gets a Woman ....

XXXI Justice Undelayed

XXXII The Friar Goes Alone

XXXIII The Frlui Given Two Weeks .

XXXIV A Cross for Every Man ....
XXXV The Friar a Complication . . .

XXXVI A Side-Trip to Skelty's ....

XXXVII Promotheus in the Toils ....

XXXVin Olaf Runs the Blockade. . , .

itXXIX Skirmishes

XL An Irritating Grin

XLI The Night-Attack

XLII Hand to Hand

XLin The Gift of the Dawn ....

XLIV Ty Jones Nods His Head ....

XLV The Little Gust o' Wind . . .

XLVI The Final Moves

]

ILLUSTRATIONS

Pack

le shot his hand across an' pulled his gun quick as a flash ;
but Horace didn't move, he just sat still, with a friendly
smile on his face. See page 223 Frontispiece

l^e found the singer on foot with a noose about his neck
an' nine rather tough-lookin' citizens holdin' a parley
with him /;

["he cow had forgot all about havin' had her hoofs pared,
an' she took after him like a hungry coyote ....

106

' I intend to kill you," said Olaf, as calm as though talkin'
about a sick sheep

' It would be a foolish waste of time," replied the Friar, as
if he was advisin' a ten-year-old boy not to fish when
the Blue Bull was high and muddy, " It wouldn't do
any good, and I shall not allow it " 173

m
II''

FRIAR TUCK

CHAPTER ONE

THE MEETING

■iH

It's a curious thing — life. Ya might just as well ask a
kitten to chase her own tail or a dog to bay at the evenin'
star, or a periodical spring to run constant, as to ask a feller
right out to tell a story. Some things can only be done
spontaneous.

Friar Tuck used to say 'at whenever he could cut it, he
alius got on the lee side o' human nature and let it ' 'ow
down on him natural ; and my way o' gettin' to the le ide
o' human nature in story-tellin' is not to ask for a story,
but to start tellin' one myself. And it 's a good plan not to
put over too good a one either ; 'cause if it seems as though
a feller is short run on stories, some listener is likely to take
pity on him and fit him out with a new assortment so as
he won't be such bad company for himself when he 's alone
again. This is the way I 've picked up most o' my stories.

Then again, it 's alius hard for me to tell what is the true
beginnin' of a story. It 's easy enough to tell cream from
milk — after the milk has stood long enough for the cream
to rise to the top; but the great trouble is, that a man's
own recollections have n't stood long enough for him to skim
out just what part he might be in need of.

Without meanin' the least mite o' disrespect to any one, it
does seem to me that if I was able to plan out any sort of

1^;

11!

¥:'

"I ;_

I ■ ':

I, I:

1)111!

a FRIAR TUCK

a memory at all. I could have made a few improvements

on the ones wc now have.

My ON^n memory is as stubborn as a mule and as gnppy as
a bulldog. What it does remember, it calls up in the shape
o' pictures; and I see old things just as plain as hvm'.
brcathin- bemgs; but try as I would. I never could keep
my memory from loadin* herself down with so many tnflcs
that sometimes I 've had to spade it over as many as six
limes to turn up some it-portant item which I was actuall>
in need of. When my memory's in a good humor, I hke
to start a pipe and lean back and just watch old scenes over
again, the same as if I was in a the-ater ; and I can see ever>^
twinkle in a pair o' well-known eyes, which have been lookm
up through six feet of earth for this many a long year,
and I can hear - actually hear -the half tones npphn
through voices which have no more part in my to-day than
the perfume o' last year's flowers; and then, like as not. my
memory '11 lay her ears back and refuse to confide what
I did with my shavin' soap.

When I look back at my own life and compare it with
others, it seems like a curious, patch-worky sort of affair
and not much more my own than the lives o' those other
with which I compare it. I alius liked my work, and yet i
never attracted my attention much. Side-trips and such-hk.
stand out plain as figures in a hand-paimed picture, sucl
as I 've seen in hotels down at Frisco; but the work part i
just a blotchy, colorless sort of smudge, the same as th
background o' one o' these pictures.

When I first took on with Jabez — every one called him o
Cast Steel Judson at this time -they wanted to know if
could ride I was nnthin' but a regular kid then, so I hande
in a purty high average as to my ridin' ability; thougl

.i ..

THE MEETING 3

truth to tell, I was n't no bronco buster those days. They
gave mc a genuwine mean one as a sta.ter, and told me to
ride him clean or step off and valk.

At that time I didn't even know how to tliscard a boss
when I couldn't stand the poundin' any longer; so when
I felt my backbone gettin' wedged too far into my skull, I
made a grab for the horn. My luck was on the job that day
and I got the quirt, instead. .\: his next pitch, my hand went
up as natural as ever, and I slammed down the quirt as hard
as I could. It landed on a ticklish spot and before he had
time to make up his mind, the cayuse had started to run,
me whalin' him at every jump and givin' thanks between 'em.
I rode him good and out as soon as he started to stampede,
and they all thought I was a real rider. Well, this gave me
a lot o* trouble — ii m' to live up to my reputation — but
that 's a good sort o trouble for a kid to have.

Now I can feel all the sensations o' this ride as plain as
though it was this mornin' ; but the's a thousand rides since
then which have all melted an' run together. The same with
most o' the rest o' my work : I alius aimed to do my bit a
little quicker and cleaner 'n the rest ; but as soon as I
learned all the tricks of it. it fell into a rut, like breathin' and
secin'. Eastcners seem to have an idee that our life must
be as carefree and joyous as goin' to a different circus every
(lay in the year; but it ain't: it's work, just like all other
work. We 're a good bit like our ridin' ponies : when we 're
in the thick of it we 're too busy to take notice ; and when
we 're through, we 're hungry — and that 's about the whole
story.

Jabez Judson was a high peak, and once a feller knew him,
he never ran any risk o' gettin' him mixed up with any one
else. He was the settest in his ways of any man I ever had

;• !,

'.ill

I';
ll

ri-

4 FRIAR TUCK

much doin's with; but he didn't change about any -if he
faced north on a question one day, he faced north on it
always; so a feller could tell just how any action would
strike him, and this made livin' with him as accurate as
workin' out a problem in multiplication, which I claim to
hold qualities o' comfort.

His daughter, Barbie, was a little tot when I first took on ;
and she was the apple of ol' Cast Steel's eye; an' his curb
bit, and his spurs a. well. Barbie and I were pals from one
end o' the trail to the other, and this explains a lot o' my
life which otherwise would n't have any answer. My ordi-
nary work at the Diamond Dot was n't out-standin' enough
to give me any special privileges; but I happened to come
back one time when the Brophy gang was about to clean
things out, and Jabez gave me credit for savin' Barbie's life ; so
'at he did n't check up my time any and I did purty much as
I pleased, only quittin' him when I couldn't put up with his
set ways any longer. I aimed to play fair with Jabez, and he
with me^ but once in a while we locked horns, though not
often, takin' everything into account.

It was shortly after ol' Cast Steel had brought in the D
lazy L brand, an' we was still pickin' up strays here an' there.
Whenever he bought up a brand he alius put the Diamond
Dot on the stuff as soon as he could, his mark commandin'
more respect than some o' the little fellers'.

When I 'd get tired o' loaring about the home place, I 'd
take one o' the boys an' we 'd start out to look for stray
bosses. Spider Kelley was with me this time, an' we had
meandered here an' there until we had picked up a big enough
string to stand as an excuse for our trip, and were about
minded to start back.
We had just forded a little crick when we heard a man's

THE MEETING 5

voice singin' off to the right. The' was a mess o' cottonwoods
between us, an' we stopped to '" ten. Now I had never
heard that voice before, an' I had never seen the man who
was running it ; but right then I was ready to believe any-
thing he had a mind to tell me. It was a deep, rich voice ;
but mellow an' tender, an' a feller could tell that he was
singin' simply because he could n't help it.

Spider looked at me with his face shinin', an' I could feel
a sort o' pleasant heat in my own face. The' was a lift an'
a swing, and a sort of rally-around-the-flag to this voice
which got right into ya, an' made you want to do something.

'"T is thine to save from perils of perdition

The souls for whom the Lord His life laid down;
Beware, lest, slothful to fulfill thy mission,

Thou lose one jewel that should deck His crown.
Publish glad tidings; tidings of peace;
Tidings of Jesus, redemption and release."

" That feller can sing some." sez Spider Kelley ; but just
then the ponies turned back on us an' b>:, the time we had
started 'em on again, the singer had passed on up the trail,
so I did n't make any reply.

I was tryin' to figure out whether it was the words or the
tune or the voice, or what it was that had made my whole
body vibrate like a fiddh string. As I said before, I see
things in pictures an' I also remember 'em in pictures: a
sound generally calls up a picture to me an' it ain't alius
a picture anyways connected with the sound itself. This
sopg, for instance, had called to my mind a long procession
of marchin' men with banners wavin' an' set faces, shinin'
with a glad sort o' recklessness. There ain't no accountin'
for the humnn mind : I had never seen such a procession
in real life, nor even in a picture ; but that was what this

r'.l

I i\

FRIAR TUCK
there on the open range suggested to me, an'
cottonwoods eager to measure the snig

song out

hurried out o' the
\vith my open e}xs.

When KC cHmb«l up out of the woods, we saw h,m go.n

up the pass MKa<l of us with our ponies follow u behmd as

"hcuM, Ihcv .V.S pan ot his outfit. Wc coul.l ,ust catch

^ , ;scs of hi,u; couoh .0 show that ho was a h,g .nan on

a Jr roan h.»s. a,,' that he was a ri.lin- n-an ,n sp.to o the

hct°.hat he was wcarin' black clothes ntadc up Eastern style.

e was still si„.in- his song, an' 1 straightened up ,n ntv

dl an- bea: llntc with tuy hand as though I hel.l a gen_

".vine swor.l in it. which is a t^l I've never had tr.ueh

't- :::Ll..ed on ,,p the trail, at. when we reaelKd *e

fnM"c o spruco 'ivccs aDoiu u. i "<- t.

„„i;.u eu. an- we foun.l the singer „u {""•.-"-"',:.",
: V „, bi^ neck au- nine rather tough-loolan' c.t.eus hobhu .
, ., ev with bin,. X\-e eatue to the sa.uc sort of a s ,1 e
',„,,,„.,. an- Spider Kellcy sez in a low tone, W h.at do ya

suppo.-ic this IS .•' " ,, , , ...

•' I don't know." scz T. touchni' my pon>, hut I m
the sln-er " ; so mc an' Spider rode on down to em.

I mmv well sensed what it was: the' was a heap o re-
,lrUn'doneatthattimean'stnn,in'amanu^

.,posedtohetheonlyc^.Vn.I..sw^^^^^^^
roll that this smger was n t a rustkr. 1 no le
,,,, „„..c was an c-vil-lookin' cuss, an if he d a ha I tne
^ V • I- U wouldn't have looked so misplaced,

rope aroun.l Ins neck, it ^^^^^ "^ ^^, ^^^^^j ^-^^ .^

ITo was ridin' a Cross hrand hoss . so .uc
helone to the Tvrrcl h>nes outtu. Most o the uth.rs in
':;'.!: ... , i'lm- U,e same brand o' hosses an weann

>■■ J

i :

We foutul the singer on foot wit!', a noose about his neck an'
rather tough-lookin' citizens holdin' a parley with him

See fage 6

nine

1 1
■ I

THE MEETING ^

the same brand of expressions. It was a tough-lookin*
bunch.

We came up to 'em an' they looked our ponies an' us over
an' nodded. We nodded back an' I asked 'em what seemed
to be the trouble.

" We 've finally got the feller who has been doin' the
rustlin' out this way," sez the leader, whose name was Flan-
nigan, Badger-face Flannigan.

" That 's good," sez I ; " but he don't look the part."
" He acts it all right," growls Badger-face, showin' his
fangs in what was meant for a grin. " He 's ridin' one of
our bosses, an' leadin' a string o' D lazy Ls."
"Leadin' 'em?" sez I.

" Yes, he 's got some sort of a charm in his voice. Whis-
kers, here, saw him go up on foot an' rope this colt an' lead
him off the same as a plow boss."

"Did Whiskers, here, see him charm the loose string,
too ? " I asked.

" No, he came in an' collected the posse, an' we decided
that this would be a good place to try him ; so we cut up the
other pass an' waited for him. When he came up, this bunch
o' ponies was taggin' after him."

I looked at the man with the noose about his neck, an' he
was grinnin' as easy an' comfortable as I ever saw a man
grin in my life. He was wearin' a vest without buttons an'
a gray flannel shirt. He had a rifle on his saddle an' a six-
shooter on his right hip. He had big gray eyes set wide
apart imder heavy brows, an' they were dancin' with laughter.
I grinned into 'em without intendin' to, an' sez : " Well, I
don't really think he charmed these loose ponies intentional.
Me an' Spider was takin' 'em in to the Diamond Dot an' we
had a hard time makin' 'em ford the crick. I 'm some thank-
ful to him for tollin' 'em up the pass."

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FRIAR TUCK

Badger-face scowled. " Well, anyhow, he charmed the
beast he 's ridin, all right ; an' he has to swing for it."

" Are you all done with tryin' him," sez I.

" What 's the use of a trial ? " snarled Badger- face. " Ain't
he ridin' a Cross brand boss, ain't the brand unvented, don't
every one know that we never sell a boss without ventin' the
brand, an' can't any one see 'at this boss was never rode
before?"

" Got anything to say for yourself, stranger?" I asked.

" Not much," sez the prisoner. " I have an appointment to
keep at Laramie; my boss gave out; so I just caught a
fresh one an' started on."

" What more do you want ? " asked Badger-face of me.

" Well, now, the' ain't any particular hurry ; an' I 'm kind
o' curious to learn a little more of his methods," sez I im-
partial. " Don't ya know 'at this is what they call hoss-
stealin' out this way? " I asked of the stranger.

" No, this is not stealin'," he replied. " I turned another
boss loose that I had picked up a hundred miles or so farther
back; and I should have turned this one adrift as soon as
he had tired. They alius wander back to their own range."

This was n't no unheard-of custom to practice out our way ;
but it was a new sort o' defence for a man with a noose about
his neck to put up, an' I see that some o' the others was
gettin' interested. The big man had a smile like a boy, an'
steady eyes, an' a clear skin; an' he didn't look at all the
kind of a man to really need stretchin'.

" What 's your plan for earnin' a livin' ? " I asked.

" I am a kind of apostle," sez he, " an' I live on the bounty
of others."

" Do you mean 'at you 're a preacher? " asked Badger- face.

" Yes," the stranger replied with a smile.

THE MEETING 9

" Well, I never see a preacher with as short hair as yours,

nor one who carried so much artillery, nor one who made a

practice o' pickin' up a fresh hoss whenever he felt like it.

Where 'd you learn to ride, an* where 'd you learn to rope? "
" Eastern Colorado. I lived there four years, an' travelled

on hossback," sez the stranger.
" I '11 bet you left there mighty sudden," sez Badger-face

with an evil leer.

" Yes," replied the stranger, with a grin, " an' I also left
on hossback."

" Well, ya satisfied now? " grunted Badger-face to me.

Livin' out doors the way I had, I naturally had a big re-
spect for brands. It 's mighty comfortin' to feel that ya can
turn your stuff loose an' know that it's not likely to be
bothered ; so I was up something of a stump about this new
doctrine. " Where 'd you get your commission from to pick
up a hoss when*;ver you feel like it ? " sez I to the stranger.

He had a little leather sack hangin' from his saddle horn,
an' he reached into it an' fished out a small book with a soft
leather cover. The feller 'at was holdin' his hoss eyed him
mighty close for fear it was some sort of a gun; but the
stranger ran over the leaves with his fingers as ready as a
man would step into the home corral an' rope his favorite
ridin' pony.

"Here's my commission," sez he, as self-satisfied as
though he was holdin' a government document ; an' then he
read aloud with that deep, mellow voice o' his, the story of
the time the Lord was minded to let himself out a little an'
came into Jerusalem in state. He read it all, an' then he
paused, looked about, holdin' each man's eyes with his own
for a second, an' then he read once more the part where the
Lord had sent in a couple of his hands after the colt that

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10 FRIAR TUCK

no man had ever backed before — an' then he closed the book,
patted it gentle an' shoved it back into the leather bag. I
looked around on the posse, an' most of 'em was rubbin'
their chins, an' studyin'. I 've noticed that while the earth
is purty well cluttered up with pale-blooded an' partially ossi-
fied Christians, the's mighty few out an' out atheists among
'em.

" That don't go," sez Badger-face, after he 'd taken time
to pump up his nerve a little.

No one said anything for a space, an' then the stranger
put a little edge on his voice, but spoke in a lower tone than
before : " That does go," he said. " No matter what else
in life may be questioned, no matter how hard and fast a
title may stick, it must crumble to dust when one comes and
says, ' The Lord hath need of this.' It may be your life
or it may be your property or it may be the one being you
love most in all the world; but when the Lord hath need,
your own needs must fall away.

" Now, boys, I love the West, I glory in the fact that I
can lay something down and go on about my business an'
come back a month later and find it just where I left it ; and
if I was takin' these bosses to sell or trade or use for my own
selfish ends, why, I would n't have a word to say again' your
stringin' me up. I brought my own boss into this country
and when it gave out I did n't have time tu barter an' trade
for another one; so I just caught one, and when it grew
weary, I turned it adrift. I don't claim the bosses I ride ; I
don't want to o\v n them ; I simply borrow them for a while
because my Lord hath need of them. I treat then- well, and
when they weary, senil 'em back to their own ra..ge with a
pat, and pick up another. The next fcLow who rides that
boss will find it a little less trouble than if I had n't used it,

THE MEETING

and there 's no harm done at all. I 'm working with you,
I 'm going to make your own work easier out here by raisin'
the respect for brands, not by makin' property rights any
looser; and you are goin' to work with me — whether you
want to or not. Now then, how much longer are you goin'
to keep this fool noose about my neck ? "

That posse wasn't easy minded, not by a jugful. This
stranger was speakin' as thougli he had power an' authority
an' public opinion all on his side, and they felt consid'able like
the tenderfoot who 'd roped the buflfalo — they was willin' to
quit any time he was.

The Cross brand boys were purty sullen an' moody; but
four o' the posse belonged to another outfit, an' they
could n't stand the strain. One of 'em, a grizzled old
codger with one lamp missin', lifted the noose from the
prisoner's neck, an' sez most respectful : " Parson, I 'm an
old man. I ain't heard a sermon for forty years, an' I 'd
be right obliged to ya if you 'd make us one."

Badger-face, he snorted scornful; but the rest of the
posse was scattered all the way from repentance to sheep-
ishness, an' the stranger he stepped to a little rise an' he
certainly did speak us a sermon. First off, he sarg us St.
Andrew's hymn — I got to learn a good many of his songs
after this, but o' course at that time I was as shy on hymns
as the re^t o' the crowd.

I tell you it was wonderful up in that little park, with
the lush grass for a carpet, the spi 'ce trees for panelin',
the bare peaks stickin' out for rafter-beams, the blue sky
above for ceiling, and that soft, deep voice fillin' the whole
place an' yet stealin' into a feller's heart as easy an' gentle
as a woman's whisper. He sort o' beat time as though
plavin' on an instrument, until before he was through

i "I

FRIAR TUCK

we were all hummin' in time with him — an' then he
preached.

He told us about the fisher folks an' how they lived out
doors under the stars the same as we did; and that this
was probably why the Lord had chose 'em first to follow
him. He said that city folks got to relyin' on themselves so
much 'at they was likely to forget that the whole earth was
still held in the hollow of the hand which had created it ;
but that men who lived with nature, out under the sun and
the stars, through the heat and the cold, the wind and the
rain, the chinook and the blizzard, felt the forces and the
mysteries all about them and this kept 'em in touch, even
when they did n't know it themselves, with the great cen-
tral Intelligence back o' these forces and mysteries. Then
he told 'em how grand their lives might be if they would
only give up their nasty little habits of thought, and learn
to think broad and free and deep, the same as they
breathed.

He told 'em 'at their minds could breathe the inspiration
of God as easy as their lungs could breathe the pure air o'
the mountains, if they 'd only form the habit. Then he
talked to 'em friendly an' confidential about their natural
devilment. He did n't talk like a saint speakin' out through
a crack in the gates o' Paradise, like most preachers do. He
called the turn on the actual way they cut up v/hen they
went to town, and just how it hurt 'em body an' soul ; and
his face grew set and earnest, and his eyes blazed; and
then he said a few words about mothers an' children and
such, and wound up with a short prayer.

Well two o' those fellers owned up right out in public
and said that from that on they was goin' to lead a decent
sort of life ; and one other said 'at he did n't have any

THE MEETING

faith in himself any longer; but he insisted on signin' the
pledge, and said if that worked, why, he 'd go on an' try the
rest of it.

The preacher shook hands with 'em all around — he had
a grip 'at wouldn't be no disgrace for a silver-tip — an'
then he sez that if any of 'em has the notion that bein' a
Christian makes a weakling of a man, why, he 's willin' to
wrastle or box or run a race or shoot at a mark or do any
other sort of a stunt to show 'at he 's in good order ; but
they size him up and take his word for it.

" Now, boys," sez he, " I hope we '11 meet often. I 'm
your friend, and I want you to use me any time you get
a chance. Any time or any place that I can serve one of
you, just get me word and I '11 do the best I can. It don't
matter what sort o' trouble you get into, get me word and
I '11 help — if I can find a way. And I wish 'at you 'd speak
it around that I 'm hard on bosses, so that the other fel-
lows will understand when I pick one up, and not cause
any delay. I '11 have to hurry along now. Good-bye ; I 'm
sorry I 've been a bother to ya."

He swung up on the big roan, waved his hand and
trotted out o' the park ; and just as he went down the pass
on the other side, it seemed that he could n't hold it in any
longer; so he opened up his voice in his marchin' song
again, an' we all stayed silent as long as we could hear the
sound of it.

"Well we are a lot of soft marks!" sez Badger-face at
last.

" That there is a true man," replied old Grizzly, shakin'
his head, " an' I '11 bet my boots on it."

This seemed to be the general verdict, an' the Cross
brand fellers went off discussin' the parson, an' me an'

■■I ..

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14 FRIAR TUCK

Spider Kelley collcctrd our punics an' went along to the
ranch, also discussin' him.

That was the first time I ever saw Friar Tuck; I made
up my mind about him just from hearin' his voice, an' be-
fore I ever saw him; but I never had to make it up any
diflferent. New lead an' new steel look consid'able alike:
but the more ya wear on lead, the sooner it wears out, whi!e
the more you wear on steel, the brighter it gets. The Friar
was steel, an' mighty well tempered.

CHAPTER TWO

THE OETTIN' UARBKK u' BOGGS

Yes, this was about the time I got interested in the bettin'
barber over at Boggs. He has n't anything to do with this
story I 'm about to tell ya, except that it was him 'at give
the Friar his name; so I '11 just skim through this part as
hasty as possible. When a feller is tellin' me a story, I
want him to stick to the trail of it ; but it seems like when
I try to tell one, myself, some feller is alius askin' me a
question 'at takes me clear out o' range.

All barbers are more or less different, except in what
might be called the gift o' gab. This one came out to Boggs
station, an' started a shop. His name was Eugene, ai ' he
was a little man with two rollin' curls to his front hair,
which he wore short behind. A curious thing about little
men is, that they don't iievrr find it nut. A little man pro-
duces more opinions 'n airy other kind, an' being small,
they haven't no place to store *em up until they get time
to ripen. A little man gives out his opinion an' then looks
savage — just as if he 'd get a switch an' make ya believe
it, whether you wanted to or not.

Eugene had come from every city the' is in the world,
an' he used to tell scandlous tales about the prominent
people who lived in 'em whose hair he had cut. He was
also familiar with the other things which had happened
since they 've begun to write history, an* if any one would
doubt one of his statements, he'd whirl about holding '\p

'(■;

i6 FRIAR TUCK

his razor, an' say: "I'll bet ya a dollar I can prove

it."

All of us fellers used to go in as often as we got a chance
to get our chins shaved an' our hair shampooed — just to
hear Eugene get indignant about things which was n't none
of our business. We used to bet with him a lot, just for
the fun o' makin' him prove up things; wh'ch he did by
writin' letters to somebody an' gettin' back .he answers he
wanted. We did n't have any way to prove our side ; so
Eugene got the money an' we had the fun.

or man Dort ran the general store and kept a pet squirrel
in a whirlabout cage, which was the biggest squirrel I ever
see, an' had its tail gnawed off by a rat, or something, be-
fore Eugene came. 01' man Dort had a reputation for
arguin', which spread all over our part of the earth. We
had made a habit o' goin' to him to get our discussions
settled an' when we began to pass him up for Eugene, he
foamed about it free an' frank.

He wore a prodigious tangle o' hair and a bunch o' griz-
zled whiskers, about as fine an' smooth as a clump o' grease-
wood. He used to brag that razor nor scissors hadn't
touched his hide for twenty years, an' one of us boys would
alius add, " Nor soap ixor water, neither," an' ol' man Dort
would grin proud, 'cause it was a point of honor with him.
Eugene used to send out for his wearin' an' sech, so ol'
man Dort did n't get a whack at him in his store ; ol' man
Dort batched, an' Eugene boarded, so they didn't clash
up at their meals; an' finally ol' man Dort swore a big
oath that he was goin' to be barbered. The news got out
an' the boys came in for forty miles to see the fun— -an'
it was worth it.

We went early to the shop an' planted ourselves, lookin'

BETTII>r' BARBER O' BOGGS

THE

^^*^ v^ XJV-/VJVJO 1^

solemn an' not sayin' anything to put Eugene on his guard.
When at last ol' man Dort hove in sight with his brows
scowled down an' his jaws set under his shrubbery, we all
bit our lips; an' Eugene stopped tellin' us about the hair-
roots o' the Pr.:...e ul Wales, an' stood lookin' at ol' man
I>ort with h s mouth gai] .d wide open.

The or t. M. came In, jhut the door careful behind him,
glared at Eugene, a^ though darin' him to do his worst, an'
said : " I want my hair shamped, an' my whisker.^ shaved
off."

" If you expected to get it all done in one day, you should
ought to have come earlier," sez Eugene soberly, but tossin'
us a side wink.

*' Well, you do as much as you can to-day, an' we '11 finish
up to-morrow," sez ol' man Dort, not seein' the joke.

or man Dort peeled off his coat, rolled up his sleeves
an' climbed into the chair as if he thought it was liable to
buck him off. Then he settled back with a grunt, an'
Eugene tucked the bib in around his neck, combed his
fingers through ol' man Dorfs hair a minute, an' sez; " Your
hair 's startin' to come out. You should ought to use a
tonic."

" Tonic, hell! " snaps the ol' man. " My hair sheds out
twice a year, same as the rest o' the animals."

" Then you should ought to comb it," sez Eugene. " I 've
got some hair here in my hand which was shed out two
years ago. Leavin' dead hair an' such rubbish as that layin'
around on your scalp is what kills the hair globules."

" It don't either; it acts like fertilizer, the same as dead
grass does." sez ol' man Dort. He had made up his mind
to take the contrary side of everything 'at Eugene said, an'
It was more fun than a dog fight.

FRIAR TUCK

Eugene started in by mowin' away tiie whiskers, an' it
was a long an' painful job ; 'cause it was almost impossible
to tell where they left off an' ol' man Dort began, an' then
they was so cluttered up with grit an' dead hair and kin-
dry deb-ris that his scissors would choke up an' pull, an'
then ol' man Dort would bob up his head an' yell out a
bunch o' profanity, and Eugene would stand back an' say
that he was a barber, not a clearer of new ground, an' that
the job ought to be done with a scythe and hoe, not with
scissors an' razor. Eugene wasn't covetous of ol' man
Dort's trade an' did n't care whether he insulted him or not.
The most fun came, though, after Eugene had got down
to where he could tell the outline of ol' man Dort's face.
First he soaked it with lather, combin' it in with a comb,
an' puttin' hot towels on it to draw out the alkalie frit an'
give his razors some show.

One of ol' man Dort's manias was, that a man ought to
pay his debts, whether it killed him or not ; so as soon as
Eugene had him steamin' under the towels we begun to talk
about a man's first duty bein' toward his kin, an' that if he
could n't pay his debts without bother, he ought to let the
debts go an' show his relatives a good time while they was
still on earth an' able to enjoy themselves.

or man Dort could n't stand it, an' tried to answer back
from under the towels ; but got his mouth full o' ouds, an'
choked on the corner of a towel until Eugene said that if
he could n't sit still an' behave himself he could go out to
some alfalfa farmer to get his tonsoral work completed.

It wasn't the ol' man's fault — he simply couldn't help
it. Touch him up on a ticklish subject, an' he just had to
come back at ya, same as a rattler. Finally, however,
Eugene had the stubble wore down an' softened until he

THE BETTIN' BARBER O' BOGGS 19
decided that he stood a chance again' it, an' then he lathered
an' nibbed, an' lathered an" rubbed, until nothin' stuck cut
below ol' man Dort's eyes except the peak of his nose ; an'
then us boys pulled out our trump card an' played it strong.
We began to talk about red squirrels.

Now, we did n't know anything professional about squir-
rels, except what ol' man Dort had told us ; but we slewed
his talk around this way an' that as if it was our own pri-
vate opinions ; an' the ol' man began to groan audible. He
gritted his teeth, though, an' bore up under it like a hero,
until Eugene begin to chip in with whr : he knew about
squirrels.

Eugene was never content to just speak of a thing in a
general way — his main method of convincin' us was to
alius fall back on his own personal experience; so this
time he began to tell of squirrels what he had been full
acquainted with. He called 'em by name an' told how they
would run to meet him an' climb up on his shor »rs an'
chatter for nuts, an' so on ; until the ol' man's ears turned
red with the strain he was under. And then, we got to dis-
cussin' the size o' squirrels.

We told about squirrels we had heard about, ai:' contested
again' each other to see which had heard o' the biggest one ;
but we never even mentioned ol' man Dort's squirrel.
Eugene had shaved his way down to below the lobe of ol'
man Dort's right ear, slippin' in a side remark to our talk
every minute or so ; an' purty soon he sez 'at he knows a
squirrel by the name o' Daniel Webster back in Montpelier,
Vermont, which was a full half inch longer 'n airy red
squirrel we had spoke of. The ol' man could n't stand this.
His head bobbed up, cuttin' a gas?h on the crook of his jaw,
and as soon as he could blow the foam out of his mouth, he

#'' 1

FRIAR TUCK

sez, " I 'n stake my life, the' ain't another squirrel in this
country as big as my own Ben Butler."

Eugene put his hand on ol' man Dort's forehead an'
pushed him back into the headrest. " You lie there," sez he,
" until I get done shavin' ya. Then, I '11 bet ya' a dollar
that I can produce a livin' squirrel which '11 out-stand, out-
weigh, an' out-fight your squirrel — an' I ain't never seen
your squirrel."

" A dollar! " snorts the ol' man, flickin' up his head. " I
would n't bother wakin' Ben Butler up for a measly dollar.
I '11 bet ya ten dollars."

" Get back on that headrest," orders Eugene. " Ten dol-
lars looks a heap sight better to me than one, an' I 'II be
mighty glad to accommodate ya."

Eugene took his fire-stick an' burned the ol' man's cut,
an' the ol' man had to scruge up his shoulders with the pain
of it; but he did it without noticin', 'cause his mind was
on squirrels. "What breed o' squirrels is yours?" he
asked.

" If you don't keep your head where I put it, I 'II throw
up the job an' let you go forth lookin' like the lost Goog o'
Mayhan," sez Eugene, raisin' his voice. 01' man Dort was
a whalin' big man, an' it tickled us a heap to see little Eugene
givin' him directions, like as if he was nothin' but a pup
dog.

or man Dort settled back with a sigh, an' Eugene leath-
ered up his razor without sayin' anything for a minute or
two. Then he sez, as he begins shavin' again: "That
squirrel I have in mind for ring contests is the short-tailed
grizzly ground-squirrel; and it's the biggest breed of
squirrels the' is."

" The' ain't no such a breed of squirrel as that I " yells ol'

THE BETTIN' BARBER O' BOGGS 2i

man Dort, springing erect in his chair, an' dullin' Eugene's
razor by the operation.

Eugene stepped back an' looked at the blood flowin' from
the fresh cut, an' he sez slow an' sarcastic; "If it don't
make any difference to you whether you have any skin on
your face or not, why I '11 just peel it off an' tack it on a
board to shave it; but hanged if I 'm goin' to duck around
trym' to shave you on the jump. The' is too grizzly ground-
squirrels."

Well, that 's the way they had it back and forth : every
time they would settle down to business an' Eugene would
get a square inch o' the ol' man's face cleared up, one of us
boys would speak something in a low tone about there bein'
rumors of an uncommon big squirrel out at some ranch
house a hundred miles or so from there, Eugene would ask
what breed of squirrel it was, an' then decide that it could n't
be a patchin' on a genuwine short-tailed grizzly ground-
squirrel, an' then ol' man Dort could n't stand it no longer
an' he would forget what he was doin', bob up in his chair,
an' lose some more of his life fluid.

Eugene scraped down both sides o' the ol' man's face,
givin' all of his razors a chance to take part in the job, an'
then he set his lips an' started in on the chin.

"What does short-tailed grizzly ground-squirrels eat,
Eugene I" asked Spider Kelley, as innocent as an infant
pigeon.

" They eat chickens, — " began Eugene, but ol' man Dort
flew clean out o' the chair an' stood over Eugene shakin'
with rage.

"Chickens?" he roars. "Chickens! The' never was a
squirrel foaled into this world what ct chickens."
Eugene looked at ol' man Dort, an' then he wiped his

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FRIAR TUCK

P ^-1

razor an' sat down on a chair, so full of disgust that he
could hardly breathe.

" I wish you 'd take off that apron an' bleed into the
spittoon," he said as calm as he could. " I 've got customers
whose patronage is what makes up my living expenses; an'
I don't want 'em to come in here an' see the whole place a
welter of gore.

"What do you think this shop is, anyway?" yelled
Eugene springing to his feet an' entirely losin' his pa-
tience. " Do you think that I make my livin' by grubbin'
down wire grass which has been let grow for fifty years,
an' eJacatin, ignoramuses in the knowledge of squirrels^
I don't care whether you believe in short-tailed grizzly
ground-squirrels or not; but if you don't let me tie your
head down to that chair, I won't shave another sprout off
your chin. I take some pride in my profession, an' I don't
intend to have no man go out o' my shop leavin' a trail o'
blood which will draw all the dogs for miles around. Now
you can take your choice."

or man Dort had to give in that this was reasonable
enough; so he climbed back into the chair, an' Eugene tied
down his head an' finished him off without any more trouble
As soon as he had stopped the bleedin' an' put on the per-
fume an' oil an' powder, he sez : " Now, what I am goin' to
do IS to get some nourishment to recuperate back my
strength, an' if you want the\vaste products washed out o'
your hair, you come back here at one o'clock prompt."

" I want to settle on that bet first," said ol' man Dort who
was just as pernicious as Eugene, once you got him riled up
" I '11 make that bet with you after dinner," sez Eueene

aint with weakness.

Now, I 'm goin' to lock i o my shop.

THE BETTIN' BARBER O' BOGGS 23
After Eugene had marched off to his boardin' house, we
all gathered around oV man Dort. an' complimented him on
his improved appearance, though to be strictly honest, the'
was considerable doubts about it. He had two teeth out in
front, an- the tobacco habit; and now, with no shrubbery
to catch the spray, he spluttered terrible when he tried to
talk fast. He said, though, that as long as he haa started
m he nitended to take the full course, ?.n' was comin' back
as soon as he 'd had a bite to eat, to get his hair laundried an'
trimmed up some around the edges; an' then he was goin'
to make that bet about the squirrels.

It was some amusin' to see the ol' man get his hair sluiced
out, but not near as much fun as seein' him shaved. When-
ever Eugene found any stray product, he 'd call us all over
an' show it to us, an' this riled the ol' man up consider-
able; but the best joke was when Eugene found a woman's
hairpin.

The ol' man vowed an' declared an' carried on somethin'
fierce; but there was the hairpin, an' we made him pay for
three rounds on the strength of it. As soon as Eugene was
all through, the ol' man settled the bill, payin' for a full day's
work like a regular sport, an' not tryin' to beg off at the
ordinary retail price; and then he hardened his face an'
sez: " Now I bet you ten doll.v., that you can't bring for-
ward a squirrel as big as my Ben Butler."

" I '11 take that bet," sez Eugene, " but you got to give me
time to locate a short-tailed grizzly. It 's the scarcest breed
the' is, an' it '11 probably cost me twice the sum to get one,
but I don't care about that. What I want is to vindicate
myself. I 'd like to see that squirrel o' yours."

" You come right along," sez ol' man Dort, glowin' with
pride. " I reckon when you see him, you '11 just hand over

FRIAR TUCK

the money at once- That is. if you know anything at all
about squirrels."

We all marched around to the general store, an' ol' man
Dort pounded on the cage. When Ben Butler sat up an'
looked around to sec what was up, the ol' man wave, his
hand at him, looked down at Eugene, an' scr : " Well ? "
He said it just like that : " Wu-el ? "

Ben Butler was rollin' fat, an' he certainly did look like
some squirrel to us; but Engene merely glanced at him, an'
sez: " Hum, what we call a dwarf red squirrel, up in Nova
Scotia. They have tails, though, up there."

The ol' man spluttered till we had to pound him on the
back. "Dwarf?" he chokes out. "Dwarf! You produce
a squirrel to match him, will ya, or else you pack up your
truck an' move on. I don't intend to have no — "

" See here, ol' man," sez Euerene. pointin' a finger at him
the same as if he 'd been a naughty child. " A short-tailed
grizzly ground-squirrel is from Uvo to four times as big as
this one, so if you want to sidestep the bet, you can do it;
but if you want to have some show for your money, I bet
you fifty to ten that I can get a squirrel three times as big
as this one. I own up that for its kind, this squirrel is of
fair, average growth ; but — "

" I '11 take that bet ! " yelled the old man. " We '11 put
up our money with Ike Spargle this minute; but I don't
want your odds. I '11 bet you even money."

Eugene shook his head as if he pitied the ol' man, an'
he sez, "Haven't you never travelled none, or seen a zoo-
logical garden ? "

" Yes, I 've travelled some, an' I 've seen all kinds o' gar-
dens," flares back the ol' man ; " but what I want now is to
fix up this bet."

THE BETTIN' BARBER O' BOGGS 25

" Who '11 be the judges? " sez Eugene.

" I don't care a snap. Any man who can see through the
holes in a ladder '11 be able to decide between the claims o'
two squirrels. Ike Spargle an' Bill Thompson can be the
judges."

" There has to be three," sez Eugene. " We '11 have Dan
Stedman be the other."

So they pit up the money an' Eugene was to have six
weeks to get h-s squirrel; an' from that on we begun to
divide up into rival camps. The' was n't any tree squirrels
out in that neck o' the woods, an' we had all forgot what
wild squirrels really was like. We knew the' was ground-
squirrels, red squirrels, gray squirrels, an' flyin'-squirrels —
although an argument was started about there bein' flyin'-
fish all right, but no flyin'-squirrels, which would have ended
in warfare if Eugene had n't been handy to settle it.

You wouldn't think that a little thing like a bet about
the size of a squirrel would take the way it did ; but Eugene
was so confident on his side, an' ol' man Dort was so dead
sure of Ben Butler, that the rest of us split up an' we each
had a little side bet on the outcome. It seemed a tarnation
long time while we was waitin' ; but in a little over a month,
Eugene got a big box which he took into his back room with-
out lettin' even the fellers who had backed his squirrel get
a peep at it.

From that on we got shaved twice a day an' our heads
washed till the hair started to change color ; so that Eugene's
trade was so improved that even if he lost the bet, he was
money ahead ; but he scoflFed the idy o' losin' the bet, even
after his squirrel arrived ; and as he was the only man who
had seen both the contestants, he had the whole country up
in the air.

FRIAR TUCK

^if

= I:

or man Dort h id made his squirrel run around the wheel
four hours a day, pokin' him up with a stick when he got
lazy; an' this gave Ben Butler sech a prodigious appetite
that the ol* man had to set up late at night to give him an
extra meal. As the day o* settlement came closer, the ol'
man tapered off on the exercise, an' doubled up on the feed,
until Ben Butler looked a full size larger, an' us fellers who
had our money on Eugeni s squirrel began to get shaky. If
it had been just an even race, it would have been a fair deal ;
but to have to show a squirrel three times larger than Ben
Butler seemed an impossibility.

Eugene had been fussin' over his entry too, an' we used
to sneak up behind his shop at nights to listen to him. We
could hear him snippin' with scissors and pullin* stoppers out
o' bottles and when he was through he 'd say : " Stand up
there, Columbus " — which was the name of his champion,
an' then he would seem to pass in a bunch o' feed, an' say —
" Gc>od boy, Columbus ! that dwarf red squirrel can turn a
double handspring in your shadder."

This used to hearten us up again, and we 'd lay a I'.ttle
more money on Eugene's squirrel. Ike, an' Bill, an' Dan —
the judges — said that they did n't claim to know anything
about the breeds o' squirrels, an' all they was to judge on
was the size, which would be settled by weight if the' was
any dispute. They got kind o' nervous toward the end,
'cause the fellers were all on edge, an' a rank decision meant
trouble in bunches.

When the final day o' settlement arrived, Boggs was seven
deep with fellers on edge to see the outcome. Most of us
had all we could spare hung up in bets ; but the' was still
a lot o' coin in the crowd, and a crew came over from
Cheyenne to take charge of it.

THE BETTIN* BARBER O' BOGGS 37

They had a game which certainly was attractive, I '11 say
that much for it. It was a round board full o' numbers, and
up the middle was a tower with slopin' sides covered with
nails, A marble was dropped into a hole at the top and
hobbled on the nails until it went into a row of holes at
the bottom, and came out in a groove leadin' to one o' the
numbers. Some o' these numbers doubled the player's
money, some of 'em paid it over to the table; but most
of 'em was neutral, and a feller had to double what he
already had up, in order to stand a show. It was an inno-
cent-appearin' game, but deceptive. When a feller had up
all he could raise, some stranger would offer him two bits
for his chance, put up the doublin' money — and win. This
was a capper o' course; but crowds don't have any sense
when they start gamblin', and this crew was cleanin' us out
until, all of a sudden, I heard a clear, low-toned voice say:
"If one o' you boys would upset that table, you 'd see the
lever which controls the marble."

I glanced up, and there was the Singin' Parson, as cool
as a frozen fish. Ol' Tom Williams, commonly known as
" Tank," had just lost six dollars, and he upset the table and
saw just how tight braced the blame game was. Then he
unlimbered his gun, and suggested that he would feel calmer
if he had the six dollars back, and the Cheyenne gambler
looked into Tank's free eye, which was pointin* at the ceilin',
and he seconded Tank's motion. After this the rest o' the
boys collected what they felt was due 'em, and the Qieyenne
crowd had to fall back on charity for their noon lunch.

Just about one o'clock, the head crook saw the Singin'
Parson standin' close to Eugene's barber shop. The shop
was locked, and the crowd around was lookin' at it. The
crook did n't want to attract any attention ; so, instead o' usin'

r. i

a8 FRIAR TUCK

a gun, he struck at the Parson with a club. He miscalculated,
and hit the shoulder instead o' the head. The Parson whirled,
grabbed the club with his left hand, and the crook's shirt
collar with his right. The crook started to pull; but we
settled down on him, and were all ready to serve out justice,
when the Parson interrupted to say that it was none of our
business, and if we 'd just form a ring, he 'd settle it to every-
body's satisfaction. He said he expected to live among us
for the rest of his life, and this would be a good time to
introduce his method.".

We took off the crook's weapons, and then formed a big
ring. The Parson was smilin" a business-like smile, while
the crook was palin' up noticeable. " I am convinced that
a man must settle some things, himself, in a new country,"
sez the Parson. *' I am larger than you, so it is fair for you
to use this club ; but I warn you in advance that 1 under-
stand how to guard again' clubs, so do your best. I 'm ready,
begin."

It was quite eddifyin' to behold: the crook made a vicious
smash at the Parson's head, the Parson bent his arm at the
elbow, muscle out, so the bone would n't get bruised, stepped
in, and hit the crook a swing in the short ribs. Some say it
lifted him ten feet, some say only eight; but any way, when
he lit, he gave a grunt like an empty barrel, and the Parson
had no trouble in layin' him over his knee and givin' him
the most liberal spankin' with that club I ever was spectator
to ; while the crowd howled itself hoarse in the throat.

Now the Parson was n't angry, he grinned all the way
through, and when he had taken as much exercise as he felt
was good for him, he set the crook on his feet, and talked
fatherly advice to him as sober an' dignified as was possible
— considcrin' the fact that the crook was dancin' about like

THE BETTIN' BARBER O' BOGGS 29

a spider on a hot skillet, and rubbin lie part which had got
most intimate with the club.

Efgene had seen it all through his window, and when it
was over, he came out and shook the Parson's hand, and
said he was just the kind needed in such an ungodly com-
munity, and that he reminded him for all the world of Friar
Tuck in Robin Hood. Now, we had n't none of us heard of
Friar Tuck up to that time ; but it was a name well fitted to
the tongue, and from the way Eugene said it, we elected it
was a compliment ; so we gave it to the Singin' Parson on
the spot, and it soaked into his bones, and he has n't needed
any other since.

This little incident kept us all in a good humor until three
o'clock, which was the fatal hour for the squirrel-contest.

Then ol' man Dort marched to the center o' the street,
carryin* his cage as though it was full o* diamonds ; an' Ben
Butler sat up an' chattered as if he was darin' the whole race
o' squirrels to bring forth his equal.

" I don't reckon a squirrel could get three times as big as
him without explodin'," sez Spider Kelley, who also had his
money on Eugene's squirrel.

" Here comes Eugene with Columbus," sez I. not carin'
to waste breath on an opinion I had backed up with good
money.

Eugene came down the street carryin' one c d of a box,
with Doc Forbes carryin' the other. The bo < was covered
with a clean apron, an' Eugene was n't lookin' down in the
mouth or discouraged.

" From the size o' that box, we 're goin' to have a ru.i for
our money," sez Spider. " If Columbus just looks good
enough to make 'em settle by the scales, I have n't any kick
comin'."

30 FRIAR TUCK

Well, as Eugene drew closer, that crowd fell into a silence
until all a body could hear was Ben Butler braggin' about
all the nuts he had et, an' what a prodigious big squirrel he
was; but Eugene never faltered. He walked up an' set his
box down careful, motioned Doc over to the side lines, made
a graceful motion to ol' man Dort, an' sez: "As yours is
the local champion you introduce him first, an' make vour
claim." ^

or man Dort removed his tobacco, wiped his forehead
an' sez: " Feller citizens, I make the claim that Ben Butler
IS the biggest full-blooded squirrel ever sent to enlighten
the solitude of lonely humanity. This is him."

The or man looked lovin'ly down at his squirrel, an' we
every one of us gave a rousin' cheer. It was all the family
the or man had, an' it meant more to him 'n a body who
hadn't never tried standin' his own company months at a
time could realize. 01' man Dort thrust some new tobacco
mto his face, bit his lips, winked his eyes rapid, an' bowed
to us, almost overcome.

Then Eugene stepped a space to the front, bowed to the
crowd in several directions, an' sez: " Gentlemen, an' feller
citizens— From Iceland's icy mountains to India's coral
strands an' Afric's sunny fountains, every nation an' every
dime has produced some peculiar product o' nature which
lifts it above an' sets it apart from all the other localities of
the globe. When you speak of the succulent banana, the
golden orange, or the prickly pineapple, Nova .Scotia remains
silent; but when you speak of varmints, she rears up on her
hind legs and with a glad shout of triumph, she hands forth
the short-tailed grizzly ground-squirrel, an' sez, * Give me
the blue ribbons, the gold medals, an' the laurel crowns of
victory.' I have the rare pleasure an' the distinctive honor

THE BETTIN' BARBER O' BOGGS 31

of presenting to your notice Columbus, the hugest squirrel
ever exhibited within the confines of captivity."

We was so took by Eugene's eloquence that we hardly
noticed him slip the apron from in front of his cage; but
when we did look, we could hardly get our breath. I was
standin' close to the Friar ; and at first he looked puzzled,
and then his face lit up with a regular boy's grin ; but he
did n't say a word.

Columbus was certainly a giant; he stood full two feet
tall as he sat up an' scrutinized around with a bossy sort of
grin. He was dappled fawn color on the sides with a curly
black streak down the back an' sort o' chestnut-red below,
with a short tail an' teeth like chisels. He won so blame easy
that even us what had bet on him did n't cheer.

or man Dort give a grin, thinkin' Ben Butler must have
won, an' then he stepped around an' looked into Eugene's
cage. He looked first at Columbus, an' then at Ben Butler,
then he looked again. " That damned thing ain't alive," he
sez. " It 's made up out o' wool yarn. Poke it up an' let me
see it move."

" Poke it yourself," sez Eugene. He was one o' these
cold-blooded gamblers who ain't got one speck o' decent sen-
timentality ; an' he was mad 'cause we had n't cheered.

or man Dort took a stick an' poked Columbus, an' Colum-
bus give a threatenin' grin, chattered savage, an' bit the
stick in two. " Give him the money, Ike," sez ol' man Dort.
" I own up I never was in Nova Scotia, an' I never supposed
that such squirrels as this grew on the face o' the whole
earth. What '11 you take for him ? " he sez to Eugene,

" It ain'* your fault that you did n't know about him," sez
Eugene, thawin' a little humanity into himself. " I don't
want to rub it in on nobody ; and I '11 give you this here

FRIAR TUCK

;

squirrel free gratis, 'cause I admit that you know more about
squirrels 'n anybody else what ever I met; an' you have the
biggest red squirrel the' is in the world."

Then we did give Eugene a cheer, an' everything loosened
up, an' we all crowded into Ike Spargle's so that them what,
won could spend a little money on them what lost.

After a time, ol' man Dort got up on a chair, an' sez : " I
want you fellers to know that Columbus won't never be my
pet. Ben Butler has been the squarest squirrel ever was, an'
he continues to remain my pet ; but I '11 study f eedin' this
condemned foreign squirrel, an' give him a fair show ; so
that if any outsiders come around makin' brags, we will have
a home squirrel to enter again' 'em an' get their money."

Eugene led the cheerin' this time, which made Eugene
solider than ever with the boys, an' when Spider an' me
got ready to ride home, he an' ol' man Dort had their
arms around each other tryin' to sing the Star Spangled
Banner.

Spider talked about Columbus most o' the way home, but
I was still. The' was somethin' peculiar about the Friar's
grin when he first sighted Columbus, and the' was somethin'
familiar about that squirrel, an' I was tryin' to adjust myself.
Just as we swung to the west on the last turn, I sez to Spider :
" Spider, I don't know what I ought to do about this? "

" About what ? " sez Spider.

" About this bet ? "

"Well, it was a fair bet, wasn't it? Columbus is full
four times as big as Ben Butler,"

" Yes," sez I, " but he ain't no squirrel."

Spider pulled up to a stop. " Ain't no squirrel ? " he sez.
" What do you take me for, did n't I see him myself? What
is he then ? "

THE BETTIN' BARBER O' BOGGS 33

" He 's a woodchuck, that 's what he is," sez I. " He 's a
genuwine ground hog with his hair cut stylish and died ac-
cordin' to Eugene's idy of high art. I remember now that
I used to see 'em when I was a little shaver back on my dad's
farm in Indiana."

Spider give a whoop, an' then he laughed, an' then he
sobered up, an' sez : " Well, you can't do nothin' now, any-
way. The judges have decided it, ol' man Dort has give it
up, it ain't your game nohow, an' if you was to try to equal
back those bets after they have been paid an' mostly spent,
you 'd start a heap o' blood-spillin' ; an' furthermore, as far
as I 'm concerned, I ain't right sure but what a woodchuck,
as you call it, ain't some kind of a squirrel. We '11 just let
this go an' wait for a chance to put something over on
Eugene."

So that 's what we made up to do ; but this gives you an
idy of how fine a line the Friar drew on questions o' sport.
He knew 'ti: we were n't full fledged angels, and that we had
to have our little diversities; but when any professional
hold-up men tried to ring in a brace game on us, he could n't
see any joke in it, and he upset the money-changers' tables,
the same as they was upset that time, long ago, in the temple.

f: !

CHAPTER THREE

ABOVE THE DUST

I 'm only about twice as old as I feel ; but I 've certainly seen
a lot o' changes take place out this way. I can look back to
the time when what most of us called a town was nothin' but
a log shack with a barrel of cheap whiskey and a mail-bag
wanderin' in once a month or so, from goodness-knows-
where. I 've seen the cattle kings when they set their own
bounds, made their own laws, and cared as little for govern-
ment-title as they did for an Injun's. Then, I 've seen the
sheep men creep in an inch at a time until they ate the range
away from the cattle and began to jump claims an' tyran-
nize as free and joyous as the cattle men had. Next came
the dry farmer, and he was as comical as a bum lamb when
he first hove into sight ; but I reckon that sooner or later
he '11 be the one to write the final laws for this section.

We 're gettin' a good many towns on our map nowadays,
we 're puttin' up a lot o' hay, we 're drinkin' cow milk, and
we 're eatin' garden truck in the summer. The old West has
dried up and blown away before our very eyes, and a few of
us old timers are beginnin' to feel like the last o' the buflfalo.
The 's more money nowadays in boardin' dudes 'n the' is in
herdin' cattle, an' that 's the short of a long, long story.

But still we hammered out this country from the rough,
and no one can take that away from us. The flag follers
trouble, an' business follers the flag, an' law follers business,
an' trouble follers the law ; but always the first trouble was

ABOVE THE DUST 35

kicked up by boys who had got so 'at they could n't digest
home cookin' any longer and just nachely had to get out an'
tussle with nature an' the heathen.

They 're a tough, careless lot, these young adventurers ;
an' they 're always in a state of panic lest the earth get so
crowded the' won't be room enough to roll over in bed with-
out askin' permission ; so they kill each other off as soon as
possible, and thus make room for the patienter ones who
follow after. From what I 've heard tell of history, this
has been about the way that the white race has managed from
the very beginning.

As a general rule it has been purt' nigh a drawn fight be-
tween the dark-skins an' the wild animals; then the lads
who had to have more elbow-room came along, and the dark-
skins and the wild animals had to be put onto reservations
to preserve a few speciments as curiosities, while the lads
fussed among themselves, each one tryin' to settle down
peaceable with his dooryard lappin' over the horizon in all
directions. Room, room, room — that was their constant
cry. As soon as one would get a neighbor within a day's
ride, he 'd begin to feel shut in an' smothered.

Tyrrel Jones was one o' the worst o' this breed. He came
out at an early date, climbed the higb^^t peak he could find,
and claimed everything 'at his gaze v iild reach in every
direction. Then he invented the Cross brand, put it on a few
cows, and made ready to defend his rights. The Cross brand
was a simple one, just one straight line crossin' another ; and
it could be put on in about one second with a ventin' iron, or
anything else which happened to be handy. Tyrrel thought
a heap o' this brand, an' he did n't lose any chances of puttin'
it onto saleable property. His herd grew from the very
beginning.

36 FRIAR TUCK

His home ranch was something over a hundred miles north-
west o' the Diamond Dot ; but I alius suspicioned that a lot
of our doggies had the Cross branded on to 'em. Tyrrel was
mighty particular in the kind o' punchers he hired. He liked
fellers who had got into trouble, an' the deeper they was in,
the better he liked *em. Character seeks its level, the same
as water; so that Tyrrel had no trouble in gettin' as many
o' the breed he wanted as he had place for. They did his
devilment free and hearty, and when they had a little spare
time, they used to devil on their own hook in a way to shame
an Injun.

The sayin' was, that a Cross brand puncher could digest
every sort o' beef in the land except Cross brand beef.
Tyrrel used to grin at this sayin' as though it was a sort of
compliment; but some o' the little fellers got purty bitter
about it. When a small outfit located on a nice piece o'
water, it paid 'em to be well oi'«: o' Ty's neighborhood. No
one ever had any luck who got in his road; but his own
luck boomed right along year after year. He alius kept more
men than he needed; an' about once a month he'd knock
in the head of a barrel o' whiskey, an' the tales they used
to tell about these times was enough to raise the hair. Ty
would work night an' day to get one of his men out of a
scrape; but once a man played him false, he either had to
move or get buried. He was n't a bad lookin' man, except
that he alius seemed keyed up an' ready to spring.

His men all had to be top-notch riders, because he had n't
any use for a gentle boss ; he did n't want his bosses trained,
he wanted 'em busted, an' the cavey he 'd send along for a
round-up would be about as gentle and reliable as a band
o' hungry wolves. If a man killed a boss, why Ty seemed
to think it a good joke, an' this was his gait all the way

i T

ABOVE THE DUST

along — the rougher the men were, the better they suited
him. He kept a pack o' dogs, and the men were encouraged
to kick an' abuse 'em; but if one of 'em petted a dog, he
was fired that instant — or else lured into a quarrel. The*
didn't seem to be one single soft spot left in the man, an'
when they got to callin' him Tyrant Jones instead of Tyrrel,
why, it suited him all over, an' he used it himself once in a
while.

The next time I saw Friar Tuck, he recognized me at first
glance, an' his face lit up as though we had been out on some
prank together an' was the best pals in the world ever since.
He wanted to know all I knew about the crowd that had
started to string him up; and when I had finished paintin'
'em as black as I could, what did he do but say that he was
goin' up their way to have a talk with 'em.

I told him right out that it was simply wastin' time; but
he was set in his ways, so I decided to ride part way with
him. He had two bosses along this trip, with his bed an'
gnib tied on the spare one ; and on the second day we reached
a little park just as the sun was setting. It was one o' the
most beautiful spots I ever saw, high enough to get a grand
view off to the west, but all the rest shut in like a little room.
He jumped from his boss, had his saddle off as soon as I did,
and also helped me with the pack. Then he looked about the
place.

" What a grand cathedral this is, Happy ! " he sez after a
minute.

I didn't sense what he meant right at first, and went on
makin' camp, until I happened to notice his expression. He
was lookin' off to the west with the level rays of the sun as
it sank down behind a distant range full in his face. The twi-
light had already fallen over the low land and all the hazy

38 FRIAR TUCK

blues an' purples an' lavenders seemed to be floatin' in a misty
sea, with here an' there the black shadows of peaks stickin'
out like islands. It really was gorgjeous when you stopped
to give time to it.

It had been gruclin" hot all day, an' was just beginnin' to
get cool an' restful, and I was feelin' the jerk of my appetite ;
but when I noticed his face I forgot all about it. I stood a
bit back of him, half watchin* him, an' half watchin' the
landscape. Just as the sun sank, he raised his hands and
chanted, with his great, soft voice booming out over the hills :
" The Lord is in His holy temple — let all the earth keep
silence before Him."

He bent his head, an' I bent mine — I 'd have done it if
the'd been a knife-point stickin' again' my chin. I tell you,
it was solemn ! It grew dark in a few moments an' the even-
ing star came out in all her glory. It was a still, clear night
without a speck in the air, and she was the only star in sight ;
but she made up for it, all right, by throwing out spikes a
yard long.

He looked up at it for a moment, and then sang a simple
little hymn beginnin', " Now the day is over, night is draw-
ing nigh ; shadows of the evening steal across the sky." It
didn't have the ring to it of most of his songs; it was just
close an' friendly, and filled a feller with peace. It spoke o'
the little children, and those watchin' in pain, and the sailors
tossin' on the deep blue sea, and those who planned evil —
rounded 'em all up and bespoke a soothin' night for 'em;
and I venture to say that it did a heap o' good.

Then he pifc^:ed in an' helped me get supper. This was his
way ; he did n't wear a long face and talk doleful ; he was
full o' life an' boilin' over with it every minute, and he 'd
turn his hand to whatever came up an' joke an' be the best

ABOVE THEDUST 39

company in the world ; but he never got far from the Lord ;
and when he 'd stop to worship, why, the whole world seemed
to stop and worship with him.

We had a merry meal and had started to wash up the
dishes when he happened to glance up again. He had just
been tellin' me a droll story about the first camp he 'd ever
made, and how he had tied on his pack so *at the hoss
couldn't comfortably use his hind legs and had bucked all
his stuff into a crick, an' I was still laughin' ; but when he
looked up, my gaze followed his. It was plumb dark by now,
an' that evening star was fair bustin' herself, and the light
of it turned the peaks a glisteny, shadowy silver. He raised
his hands again and chanted one beginning: "Praise the
Lord, O my soul, and all that is within me, praise His holy
name."

The' was a part in this one which called upon all the works
o' the Lord to praise Him, and I glanced about to see what
was happenin'. A faint breeze had sprung up and the spruce
trees were bowin' over reverently, the ponies had raised their
heads and their eyes were shinin' soft and bright in the fire-
light as they looked curiously at the singer ; and as I stood
there with a greasy skillet in my hand, something inside of
me seemed to get down on its knees, to worship with the
other works o' the Lord.

It was one o' those wonderful moments which seem to
brand themselves on a feller's memory, and I can see it all
now, and hear the Friar's voice as it floated away into the
hills until it seemed to be caught up by other voices rather
than to die away.

Well, we sat up about the fire a long time that night! He
did n't fuss with me about my soul, or gettin' saved, or such
things. I told him the things I did n't understand, and he

40 FRIAR TUCK

told me the things he did n't understand ; and I told him
about some o' my scrapes, and he told me about some o' his,
and — well, I can't sec where it was so different from a lot
of other nights ; but I suppose I 'd be sitting there yet if he
had n't finally said it was bedtime.

He stood up and looked at the star again, and chanted
the one which begins : " Lord, now let thy servant depart
in peace " ; after which he pulled off some of his clothes and
crawled into the tarp. I crawled in beside him about two
minutes later; but he was already asleep, while I lay there
thinkin' for the best part of an hour.

Next mornin' he awakened me by singin', " Brightest and
best of the sons of the morning"; and after that we got
breakfast, and he started on to Ty Jones's while I turned
back to the Diamond Dot. I did n't think he 'd be able to
do much with that gang; but after the talk I 'd had with him
the night before, I saw 'at they could n't do much to him,
either. I had got sort of a hint at his scheme of life ; and
there isn't much you can do to a man who doesn't value
his flesh more 'n the Friar did his.

CHAPTER FOUR

TY JONES

Ty Stood in his door as the Friar rode up, and he recognized
him from the description Badger-face had turned in. Bad-
ger-face had been purty freely tongue-handled for not havin*
lynched the Friar, and Ty Jones was disposed to tilt his
welcome even farther back than usual; so he set his pack
on the Friar. He had six dogs at this time, mastiffs with
a wolf-cross in 'em which about filled out his notion o' what
a dog ought to be.

The Friar had noticed the dogs, but he did n't have an idee
that any man would set such creatures on another man ; so
he had dismounted to get a drink o' water from the crick,
it havin' been a hot ride. The pack came surgin' down on
him while he was lyin' flat an' drinkin' out o' the crick. His
ponies were grazin' close by, and as soon as he saw 'at the
dc^s meant business, he vaulted into the saddle just in time
to escape 'em.

They leaped at him as fast as they came up, and he hit
'em with the loaded end of his quirt as thorough as was pos-
sible. He was ridin' a line buckskin with a nervous disposi-
tion, and the pony kicked one or two on his own hook;
but as the Friar leaned over in puttin' down the fifth, the
sixth jumped from the opposite side, got a holt on his
arm just at the shoulder, an' upset him out of the saddle.
In the fall the dog's grip was broke an' he and the Friar
faced each other for a moment, the Friar squattin' on one

4^ FRIAR TUCK

knee with his fists close to his throat, the dog crouchin' an'
snarHn'.

As the dog sprang, the Friar tipper-cut him in the throat
with his left hand and when he straightened up. hit him over
the heart with his right. He says that a dog's heart is \HX)rly
protected. Anything 'at did n't have steel over it was poorly
protected when the Friar struck with his right in earnest.
The dog was killed. One o' the dogs the pony had kicked
was also killed, but the other four was able to get up and
crawl away.

The Friar shook himself and vent on to where Ty Jones
and a few of his men were standin*. " That 's a nice lively
bunch o' dogs you have," sez he, smilin' as pleasant as usual ;
" but they need trairin'."

" They suit me all right," growls Ty, " except that they 're
too blame clumsy."

The Friar looked at him a minute, and then said drily,
" Yes, that *s what I said ; they need trainin'."

Ty Jones scowled : " They don't get practice enough," sez
he. " It 's most generally known that I ain't a-hankerin' for
company ; so folks don't usually come here, unless they 're
sure of a welcome."

" I can well believe you," said the Friar, laughin', '• and I
hope the next time I come I '11 be sure of a welcome."
" It 's not likely," sez Ty shortly.

The Friar just stood and looked at him curiously. He
did n't believe that Ty could really mean it. The' was n't a
streak of anything in his own make-up to throw light on a
human actin' the way 'at Ty Jones acted ; so he just stood
and examined him. Ty stared back with a sneer on his
face, and I 'm sorry I could n't have been there to see 'em
eyein' each other.

TY JONES 43

" Do you really mean," sez the Friar at last, " that you
hate your fellow humans so, that you N' e a perfect
stranger away from your door ? "

" I have n't any use for hoss-thicvcs," scz Ty,

The Friar's face lighted. *' Oh, that 's all right," sez he
in a relieved tone. " As long as you have a special griev-
ence again' nie, why, it 's perfectly natural for you to act
up to it. It would n't be natural for most men to act up to
it in just this way, but still it *s normal ; while for a man to
set his doge on a total stranger would be monstrous. I 'm
glad to know 'at you had some excuse ; but as far as hoss-
stealin' goes, that roan is back with your band again. I
saw him as I came along."

Ty was somewhat flabbergasted. He wasn't used to
havin' folks try out his conduct and comment on it right to
his face; and especially was he shocked to have his morals
praised by a preacher. He knew 'at such a reception as had
just been handed to the Friar would have taken the starch
out o' most men an' filled 'em with a desire for revenge
ever after ; but he could see that the Friar was not thinkin'
of what had been handed to him, he was actually interested
in himself, Ty Jones, and was honestly tryin' to see how it
was possible for such a condition to exist; and this set
Ty Jones back on his haunches for true.

" For all time to come," he sez slow and raspy, " I want
you to leave my stuff alone. H you ever catch up and ride
one of my bosses again, I '11 get your hide ; and I don't
even want you on my land."

Then the Friar stiffened up; any one in the world, or
any thing, had the right to impose upon the Friar as a man ;
but when they tried to interfere with what he spoke of as
his callin', why, he swelled up not ;able. The Friar's hu-

44 FRIAR TUCK

mility was genuine, all right ; but it was about four times
stiffer an' spikier than any pride I've ever met up
with yet.

" I shall not ride your bosses," sez he, scornful, " nor
shall I tread upon your land, nor shall I breathe your air,
nor drink your water; but in the future, as in the past, I
shall use for the Lord only those things which belong to
the Lord. The things which are the Lord's were His from
the beginning, the things which you call yours are merely
entrusted to your care for a day or an hour or a moment.
I do not covet your paltry treasures, I covet your soul and
I intend to fight you for it from this day forward."

The Friar spoke in a low, earnest tone; and Ty Jones
stared at him. Ya know how earnest an insane man gets?
Well, the' was something o' this in the Friar when he was
talkin' business. You felt that he believed that what he
was sayin' was the truth, and you felt that if it was the
truth, it was mighty well worth heedin', and you also felt
that in spite of its bein' so everlastin' different from the
usual view o' things, it might actually be the truth after all
and a risky thing to pass up careless.

After waitin' a minute without gettin' a reply, the Friar
turned on his heel to walk away, stumbled, and slipped to
the ground, and then they noticed a pool of blood which had
dripped from him as he stood. He had forgotten that the
dog had torn him, an' the men had looked into his eyes,
as men always did when he talked, and they had forgot it,'
too. Now, when he fell, Olaf the Swede stepped forward to
help him up.

Olaf was tlie best man 'at Ty Jones had, from Ty's own
standpoint. Ty had happened to be over at Skelty's one
night when Skelty was givin' a dance. Skelty had six girls

TY JONES 45

at this time, an' he used to give a dance about once a week.
Along about midnight, they got to be purty lively affairs.
This night Skelty had bragged what a fine shot he was, an'
the boys were kiddin' him about it, because Skelty wasn't
no sliot at all as a rule. It was a moonlight night, and while
they was sheepin' Skelty about his shootin', two strangers
rode up, tied their bosses to the corral, an' started up the
path toward the door.

Skelty looked at 'em an' sez, " Why, if I had a mind to,
I could pick one o' those fellers off with this gun as easy
as I could scratch my nose." He pulled his gun and held
it over his shoulder.

All the boys fair hooted, an' Skelty dropped his gun an'
shot one o' the strangers dead in his tracks. The other
came a g on the run with Skelty shootin' at him as fast
as he could pop; but he only shot him once, through the
leg, and he limped in an' made for Skelty with his bare
hands. Skelty hit him in the forehead, knocked him down
an' jumped on him. He kept on beatin' him over the head
until the stranger managed to get a grip on his wrists He
held one hand still, an' puttin' the other into his mouth, bit
off the thumb.

The's somethin* about bein' bit on the thumb which melts
a man's nerve ; and in about five minutes, the stranger had
Skelty's head between his knees, and was makin' him eat
his own gun. It must have been a hideous sight ! Some say
that he actually did make Skelty eat it, and some say that
he only tore through the throat; but anyway, Skelty
didn't quite survive it, and Ty Jones hired the stranger,
which was Olaf the Swede.

Olaf was one c' those Swedes which seem a mite too big
for their skins. The bones in his head stuck out, his jaws

3 it

FRIAR TUCK

stuck out prodigious, his shoulders stuck out, his hands
stuck out — he fair loomed up and seemed to crowd the
landscape, and he was stouter 'n a bull. When he let himself
go he alius broke somethin'; but he had a soft streak in
him for animals, an' Ty never could break him from bein*
gentle with bosses, nor keep him from pettin' the dogs
once in a while. Olaf had n't no more morals 'n a snake at
this time, an' when it came to dealin' with humans, he suited
Ty to the minute ; but he just simply would n't torture an
animal, and that was the end of it. Olaf was n't a talkin'
man; he never used a word where a grunt would do, and
he was miserly about them ; but he certainly was set in his
ways.

The Friar hadn't fainted, he had just gone dizzy; so
when Olaf gave him a lift he got to his feet and walked
to his horse. He alius carried some liniment an' such in
his saddle bags, an' he pulled off his shirt and cleaned out
the wound and tied it up, with Olaf standin' by and tryin'
to help. Now, it made something of a murmur, when the
Friar took off his shirt. In the first place, the dog had
give him an awful tear, and for the rest, the Friar was
a wonderful sight to behold. He was as strong as Olaf
without bein' bulgey, and his skin was as white and smooth
as ivory. He was all curves and tapers with medium small
hands and feet, and a throat clean cut and shapely like the
throat of a high-bred mare. Olaf looked at him, and
nodded his head solemnly. Badger-face hated Olaf,.
because Olaf had a curious way of estimatin' things and
havin' 'em turn out to be so, which made Ty Jones put
faith in what Olaf said, over and above what any one
else said.
As soon as the Friar had finished tyin' up the wound, he

TYJONES 47

turned and walked up to Ty Jones. "Friend," he said,
" I don't bear you a grain o' malice, and nothing you can
ever do to me will make me bear you a grain o' malice. I
know a lot about medicine, and perhaps I can help you that
way sometime. I want to get a start with you some way ;
I want to be welcome here, and I wish 'at you 'd give me
a chance."

" Oh, hell ! " sneered Ty Jones. " Do you think you can
soft-soap me as easy as you did the boys ? You 're not wel-
come here now, and you never will be. I 've heard all this
religious chatter, and there 's nothin' in it. The world was
always held by the strong, by the men who hated their ene-
mies and stamped them out as fast as they got a chance;
and it always will be held by the strong. Your religion is
only for weaklings and hypocrits."

The Friar's face lighted. " Will you discuss these things
with me? " he asked. " I shall not eat until this scratch is
healed, I have my own bed and will not bother you ; won't
you just be decent enough to invite me to camp here, give
me free use of water, and grass for my bosses, while you
and I discuss these things fully ? "

" I told you I did n't want you about, and I don't," sez
Ty. " The's nothin' on earth so useless as a preacher, and
I can't stand 'em."

" Let me work for you," persisted the Friar. " All I ask
is a chance to show 'at I 'm able to do a man's work, and
all the pay I ask is a chance to hold service here on Sun-
days. If I don't do my work well, then you can make me
the laughin' stock o' the country ; but I tell you right now
that if you turn me away without a show, it will do you
a lot more harm than it will me."

Ty thought 'at probably the Friar had got wind o' some

48 FRIAR TUCK

of his devilment, and was hintin' that his own neck de-
pended on his men keepin' faith with him ; so he stared at
the Friar to see if it was a threat.

The Friar looked back into his eyes with hope bearnin' in
his own; but after a time Ty Jones scowled down his
brows an' pointed the way 'at the Friar had come. " Go,"
sez he, stiff a. ever. " The' ain't any room for you on the
Cross brand range; and if ya try anything underhanded,
I '11 hunt ya down and put ya plumb out o' the way."

So the Friar he caught his ponies and hit the back trail ;
but still it had been purty much of a drawn battle, for Ty
Jones's men had used their eyes and their ears, and they
had to give in to themselves 'at the preacher had measured
big any way ya looked at him ; while their own boss had
dogged it in the manger to a higher degree 'n even they
could take glory in.

As the Friar rode away, he sagged in his saddle with his
'lead bent over; and they thought him faint from his
wound ; but the truth was, that he was only a little sad to
think 'at he had lost. He was human, the Friar was ; he
used to chide himself for presumptin' to be impatient; but
at the same time he used to fidget like a nervous boss when
things seemed to stick in the sand; and he didn't sing a
note as long as he was on the Cross brand range — which
same was an uncommon state for the Friar to be in, him
generally ma. chin' to music.

CHAPTER FIVE

THE HOLD-UP

This was the way the Friar started out with us ; and year
after year, this was the way he kept up. He was friendly
with every one, and most every one was friendly with him.
Some o' the boys got the idea that he packed his guns along
as a bluff ; so they put up a joke on him.

They lay in wait for him one night as he was comin'
up the goose neck. I, myself, didn't rightly savvy just
how he did stand with regard to the takin' of human life
in self-defence; but I knew mighty well 'at he wasn't no
bluffer, so I did n't join in with the boys, nor I did n't warn
him ; I just scouted along on the watch and got up the hill
out o' range to see what would happen.

He came up the hill in the twilight, singin' one of hfs
favorite marchin' songs. I 've heard it hundreds of times
since then, and I 've often found myself singin' it softly
to myself when I had a long, lonely ride to make. That
was a curious thing about the Friar: he didn't seem
to be tampin' any of his ideas into a feller, but first
thing the feller knew, he had picked up some o' the
Friar's ways; and, as the Friar confided to me once, a
good habit is as easy learned as a bad, and twice as
comfortin'.

Well, he came up the pass shufflin' along at a steady
Spanish trot as was usual with him when not overly rushed,
and singin':

so FRIAR TUCK

" Guide me, O Thou great Jehovah f
Pilgrim through this barren land;
I am weak, but Thou art mighty;
Hold me with Thy powerful hand."

He came up out of the pass with his head thrown back,
and his boy's face shinin' with that radiatin' joy I have n't
ever seen in another face, exceptin' it first caught the re-
flection from the Friar's; and the notion about died
out o' the boys' minds. They were all friends of his and
wouldn't have hurt his feelin's for a lot; but they had
itched about his weapons for such a spell that they finally
had to have it out; so when he rounded a point o' rock,
they stepped out and told him to put his hands up.

They were masked and had him covered, and his hands
shot up with a jerk ; but he did n't stop his singin', and his
voice did n't take on a single waver. Fact was, it seemed
if possible a shade more jubilant. He had reached the
verse which sez:

Feed me with the heavenly manna

In this barren wilderness;
Be my sword and shield and banner.

Be the Lord my Righteousness ";

and as he sang with his hands held high above his head, he
waved 'em back and forth, playin' notes in the air with his
fingers, the way he did frequent ; and it was one o' the most
divertin' sights I ever saw.

Those blame scamps had all they could do to keep from
hummin' time to his song; for I swear to you in earnest
that the Friar could play on a man's heart the same as if
it was a fiddle. He kept on an' finished the last verse while
I crouched above 'em behind a big rock, and fairly hugged
myself with the joy of it. Ol' Tank Williams was a big
man and had been chosen out to be the leader an' do the

THE HOLD-UP

talkin', but he had n't the heart to jab into the Friar's singin' ;
so he waited until it was all over. Then he cleared his
throat as though settin' off a blast of dynamite, and growls
out : " Here, you, give us your money."

Ten six-shooters were pointin' at the Friar, but I reckon
if he had known it would of exploded all of 'em, he 'd have
had to laugh. He threw back his head and his big free
laugh rolled out into the hills, until I had to gnaw at a
corner o' the stone to keep from joinin' in. " My money ! "
sez he as soon as he could catch his breath. " Well, boys,
boys, whatever put such a notion as that into your heads.
Take it, take it, you 're welcome to it ; and if you are able
to find more than two bits, why, I congratulate you most
hearty ; because two bits was all I could find this morning,
and that will only be a nickle apiece, and five cents is small
pay for robbin' a volunteer missionary."

or Tank Williams was a serious-minded old relic, and
he was feelin' so sheepish just then that it seemed to him
as though the Friar had imposed on him by lurin' him into
such a fix ; so he roars out in earnest : " If you ain't got
no money, why the deuce do ya tote those guns about with
ya all the time?"

" Would you just as soon tie me to a tree, or take some
other measures of defence? " asked the Friar politely. " My
arms are gettin' weary and I could talk more comfortable
with 'em hanging' down."

" Aw put 'em down, and talk on," sez George Hendricks.

" Thank you," sez the Friar. " Well, now, boys, the man
who does n't take the time to put a value on his own life,
is n't likely to make that life very much worth while. He
mustn't overvalue it to such an extent that he becomes a
coward, nor he must n't undervalue it to such an extent that

53 FRIAR TUCK

he becomes reckless — he must take full time to estimate
himself as near as he is able.

" I don't know that I can alius keep from judgin' my
fellow men ; but I am sure that I would not judge one to
the extent of sayin' that my life was worth more than his,
so I should never use a gun merely to save my own life
by takin' away the life of another man — much less would
I use a gun in defence of money; but I am a purty good
shot, and sometimes I can get a man interested by shootin*
at a mark with him. This is why I carry firearms. Do
you want the two bits ? "

" Aw, go on," yells ol' Tank, madder at himself 'n ever.
" We did n't intend to rob ya. All we wanted was to hear
ya sing and preach a bit " ; and he pulled off his mask and
shook the Friar's hand. All the rest o' the boys did the
same; and I dumb up on my rock, flapped my wings, and
crowed like a rooster.

Well, we sat on the ground, and he sang for us : and then
he sobered and began to talk about cussin'. It used to hurt
the Friar to hear some o' the double-jointed swear words
we used when excited. He tried not to show it, because he
didn't want anything to shut us away from him at any
time ; but whiles his face would wrinkle into lines of actual
pain.

" Now, boys," he began, " I know, 'at you don't mean
what you say in a profane way. You call each other ter-
rible names, and condemn each other to eternal punishment ;
and if a man said these things in earnest, his life would be
forfeit; but you take it merely as a joke. Now, I do not
know 'N.tst how wicked this is. I know that it is forbidden
to take the name o' the Lord thy God in vain; so it is a
dangerous thing to be profane even in thoughtlessness ; but

THE HOLD-UP

I have heard the Lord's name used by the perfectly respect-
able in a way which must have hurt his tender nature

more.

" Once in the crowded slum district of a large eastern city,
I saw a freight car back down on a child and kill it. The
mother was frantic; she was a foreigner and extra emo-
tional, and she screamed, and cursed the railroad. A man
had come to comfort her, and he put his hand on her arm
and said, ' My dear woman, you must not carry on this
way. We must always bow our heads in submission to the

Lord's will.'

" For years the poor people o' that neighborhood had
begged protection for their children ; and I cannot believe
that it was the Lord's will that even one o' the least of 'em
should have been slain in order to drive the lesson a little
deeper home; so, as I said before, I am not going to talk
to you of the wickedness of swearing — but I am goin'
to talk about its foolishness, its vulgarity, and its brutality."
He went on showin' that swearin' was foolish because it
wasn't givin' a man's thought on things in a man's way;
but merely howlin' it out the way wolves and wild-cats had
to, on account o' their not havin' a civilized language with
which to express the devilment which was in 'em. He
showed how it made a feller lazy; because instead of
tryin' to sort out words which would tell exactly what he
meant, he made a lot of noises which had no more real
meanin' than a bunch o' fire-crackers.

Then his voice got low and serious, and he said 'at the
worst thing about cussin' was, that it led a feller into
speakin' lightly about the sacred things of life. "When
you speak the word ' son,' " he said, " you are bound to also
call up the thought of ' mother ' ; and I want to say to you

FRIAR TUCK

right now that any one who can be coarse and nasty ?n
thinkin' or speakin' about maternity, is not a man at all —
or even a decent brute — but has some sort of soul-sickness
which is more horrible than insanity. Always be square
with women — all women, good and bad. I know your
temptations, and I know theirs. Woman has a heavy cross
to carry, and the least we can do, is to play fair."

Then he sprang some of his curious theories on us : told
us how the body was full of poisons and remedies; and it
depended on our plan of livin', whether we used the one
or the other. He said he alius cut out food and tobacco on
Fridays, and if he did n't feel bright and clear and bubblin'
over with vitality, he fasted until he felt able to eat a rubber
boot, and then he knew he had cleaned all the waist prod-
ucts out of him, and could live at top speed again. He
finished up by tellin' of a cross old doctor he once knew,
who used to say 'at cattle and kings did n't have to control
themselves; but all ordinary men had to use self-denial,
even in matters of pleasure.

It was more the way the Friar said things than what he-
said ; his voice and his eyes helped a lot ; but the thing 'at
counted for most was the fact 'at you knew it was n't none
of it put on. He loved to joke when it was a jokin' matter;
but he was stiff as stone with what he called the foundations
of life. A man, you know, as a rule, is mighty timid about
the things which lie close to his heart, no matter how bold
and free he'll talk about other things; but the Friar was
like a little child, an' he 'd speak out as bold and frank as
one, about the things he loved and hated, until he finally
put a few drops o' this queer brand o' courage into our own
hearts.

Of course we did n't get to be troubled with wing-growth

THE HOLD-UP 55

or anything like that; but a short time after this fake
hold-up, or Tank Williams went in to fill up with picklin'-
fluid, and he started in on Monday and kept fightin' it all
that week until Friday. Then he said that he wouldn't
neither eat, drink, nor smoke on that day ; and they could n't
make him do it. He started in on Saturday to continue
what had started out to be one o' the best benders he had
ever took ; but the first quart made him sick as a dog, and
he cami out to the ranch and said at the Friar had made
him a temperate man, and for the rest of his life he intended
to set aside one day a week in the Friar's favor.

After the boys had started for the ranch, the Friar invited
me to spend the night with him; so we unpacked his bed
from the lead-hoss and we built a little fire and had a right
sociable time of it. Me and him was good pals by this
time. He had said to me once : " Happy, you do more gen-
eral thinkin' than some varsity men I 've known."

" I reckon," sez I, modest as I could, " that a man who
has bossed a dozen men and ten thousand cattle through a
three days* blizzard, has to be able to think some like a
general."

Then he explained to m: that general thinkin' meant to
think about stars an' flowers an' the human race an' the
past an' the future, an' such things, and not to be all the
time lookin' at life just from the way it touched a *eller
himself. This was another thing I liked about him. i\Iost
Fasteners is so polite that they haven't the heart to set
a feller right when he has the wrong notion; but the Friar
would divvy up on his knowledge as free as lie would on
his bacon or tobacco; so I opened mysdf up to him
until he knew as much about me as I did myself.

He did n't have much use for the shut-eye this night, nor

' *8

FRIAR TUCK

he wasn't as talky as common; so we sat smokin' and
lookin' into the fire for a long time. Once in a while he 'd
speak a verse about some big deed a man had done years
ago, or else one describin' the mountains or something like
that ; until finally I asked him how it came that a man who
loved adventure an' fightin' an' feats of skill, the way he
did, had selected to be a preacher.

" We don't select our lives, Happy," sez he. " You 're
surely philosopher enough to se that. As far as we can
see, it is like that gamblin' game, e roll down through a
lot o' little pegs bobbin* off from one to another until finally
we pop into a little hole at the bottom ; but we did n't pick
out that hole. No, we did n't pick out that hole."

So I up and asked him to tell me somethin' about his
start

CHAPTER SIX

A REMINirCENCE

I riTY the man who has nev- :lcpt out doors in the Rock)*
Mountains. Swingin' aroui.d wi.h the earth, away up there
in the starlight, he fills i.ims' f lall ■ ncv life with every
breath; and no matter how uwjli rn. .'ny has been, he is
bound to wake up tb^ now nio.aii.' nlunib .. sted, and with
strength and energy fair <Ur.r,in' ilirtuf^'h ! ii veins. For it
to be perfect, a fell r l:.is to lio' c a pipe, a fire, and some
one close and chummy U cliat w th. This night me an' the
Friar both went down lo tho 'lici nd washed our feet.
We sat on a log side by side • .lad*- noises like a flock of
bewildered geese when we first stuck our feet into the icy
water ; but by the time we had raced back and crawled into
his bed, we were glowin' all over.

We didn't cover up right away, because the Friar just
simply couldn't seem to get sleepy that night; and after
a minute he put some more wood on the fire, filled his pipe
again, and said : " So you want me to tell you about my
story, hu? Well, I believe I will tell you about my
boyhood."

So I filled my pipe, and we lay half under th* tarp with
our heads on our hands and our elbows on our x ots, which
were waitin' to be pillows, and he told me about the early
days, talkin' more to himself than to me,

" My mother died when 1 was six years old, my father
divided his time between cleanin' out saloons, beatin' me,

FRIAR TUCK

Ki'

an' Hvin' in the work-house," began the Friar, and it give
me kind of a shock. I 'd had a notion that such-like kids
was n't likely to grow up into preachers ; and T 'd alius sup-
posed 'at the Friar had had a soft, gentle youth. " I was
a tough, sturdy urchin," he went on, "but I alius had a
soft heart for animals. I used to fight several times a day ;
but mostly because the other kids used to stone cats and tie
tin cans on dogs' tails. I used to shine shoes, pass papers,
run errands, and do any other odd job for a few pennies,
and at night I slept wherever I could. I had a big dry-
goods-box all to myself for several months, once, and I
still look back to it as being a fine, comfortable bedroom.

" One morning I was down at the Union Depot when a
farmer drove up a big Norman boss hitched to a surrey.
Some o' the other kids joshed him, called the boss an ele-
phant and asked where the rest o' the show was. The man
was big, well fed, and comfortable lookin', same as the
boss, and he did n't pay any heed to the kids except to call
one of 'em up to hold the boss while he went into the depot.
The kid wanted to know first what he was goin' to be
paid, and he haggled so long 'at the farmer beckoned to
me to come up, ' Will you hold my boss for me a few
minutes ? ' he asked.

" That big gray boss with the dark, gentle eyes seemed
to me one of the most beautiful things I had ever seen, and
I was mighty anxious to have charge of him, even for a few
minutes ; so I sez, ' You bet I will.'

" The other kids roasted me and made all manner o' sport ;
but they knew I would fight 'em if they got too super-fluous,
so after a bit they went on about their business. The's
somethin' about man's love for a boss that 's a little hard
to understand. I had never had no intimate dealin's with

It w

A REMINISCENCE

one before, yet somethin' inside me reached out and en-
twined itself all about this big, gray, velvet-nosed beauty
left in my charge. I reckon it must be in a man's blood;
that's the only explanation I can find. All the way back
along the trail o' history we find the bones of men and bosses
bleachin' together in the same heap ; and about every worth-
while spot on the face o' nature has been fought over on
hossback, so it 's small wonder if the feel of a boss has got
to be part of man's nature.

"The farmer had had a woman and a little girl in his
care, to see oflf on the train, and he was gone some time. I
had a few pennies in my pocket, and I bought an apple an'
fed it to the boss, gettin' more enjoyment out of it than out
of airy other apple I 'd ever owned. I can feel right now
the strange movin's inside my breast as his moist nose
sniffed at my fingers and his delicate lips picked up the bits
of apple, as careful an' gentle as though my rough, dirty
little hand had been made o' crystal.

" I was so interested in the boss that I gave a start of
surprise when the farmer's voice behind me sez: 'You
seem to like bosses, son.'

" ' I had n't no idee 'at a great big one like this could be
so smooth an' gentle,' I said, with my hand rubbin' along
the boss's throat. ' I think he 's a wonder.'

" ' Do you like other animals ? ' asked the farmer.

" ' I reckon I must be an animal myself,' sez I, ' because
I alius get along well with them, while I have to fight a
lot with humans.'

"'Whs-t do you want for tendin' to this boss?' he
asked me.

'"I don't want nothin',' sez I. 'We've got to be
friends, an' I don't charge nothin' for doin' favors for a

6o FRIAR TUCK

friend. Besides, he's got so much sense, I doubt if he
needs much watchin'.'

*' The farmer grinned, looked into my eyes a long time,
and gave me a dollar. ' Now tell me how you '11 spend your
dollar,' sez he.

" Well, I was purty well floored. I had never owned a
dollar before in my whole life, my father havin' taken away
every cent he had ever found on me; and I stood lookin'
at the coin, and hardly knowin' what to do. The farmer
stood lookin' down at me with his eyes twinklin', and after
a minute, I handed the dollar back to him. ' This is too
much,' I sez. ' A dime would be plenty for the jo. even
if I did n't like the boss ; but if my old man would find a
dollar on me, he 'd give me a beatin' for hidin' it from him,
take it away, get drunk, and then give me another beatin'
for not havin' another dollar.'

" So he asked me all about my father ; and I told about
him and about my mother bein' dead, and the twinkle left
his eyes and they grew moist, so 'at he had to wink mighty
fast.

" ' He told me that his own boy was dead and his girl
married, and that the' wasn't any children out at the big
farm, and asked me if I wouldn't like to come and live
with him. He told me about all the bosses an' the cows
an' the pigs, an' that I could have a clean little room to
sleep in, an' plenty o' food and clothes, and could go to
school. It sounded like a fairy talc to me, and I sez, ' Aw
go on, you 're just joshin' me '; but he meant it; so I got
on the seat beside him, and as soon as we got out o' town
he let me drive the big gray boss — and I entered into a
real world more wonderful than any fairy tale ever was.

" When we drove up the shady lane and into the big

A REMINISCENCE

bam lot, a little old lady with sad eyes came to the door,
and sez : ' Now, John, who is that with you ? ' and my heart
sank, for I thought she was n't goin' to stand for me ; but
he took me by the hand and led me up to the door, put his
arm about the little woman's shoulder, and sez with a tremble
in his voice : ' This here is a little feller I 've brought out to
be company for ya, mother. He has n't any folks, and he is
fond of animals, and, and — his name is John, too.*

" At first she shook her head and shut her lips tight ; but
all of a sudden the tears came to her eyes, and she put her
arms about me — and I had found a real home.

" Those were wonderful years, Happy, wonderful ; and
I have the satisfaction o' knowin' that I did them about
as much good as they did me. Their hearts had been
wrapped up in the boy, and he must have been a fine feller ;
but just when he had been promoted out o' the grammar
grade at the head of his class, he had took the scarlet fever
an' died. I was n't used to kindness when I went there ; so
I never noticed 'at they kept me out o' the inner circle o'
their hearts at first. I called the little woman Mrs. Car-
michael for some time ; but one day after I 'd brought home
a good report from school, I called her this, and she spoke
to me sharp — I never knew any soft-hearted person in the
world who got so much solid satisfaction out of actin' cross
as she did. VVell, she spoke to me sharp, and sez : ' John
Carmichael, why don't you call me Mother?'

" I looked into her face, and h lid n't look old any longer,
and the sad look had left her eyes, and they were black and
snappy an' full o' life; so I tried it; and we both broke
into tears, but they were tears o' joy ; and then he insisted
that J call him Dad, and we became a family ; and about the
happiest one in the world, I reckon.

FRIAR TUCK

" I rode the bosses bareback, shot hawks with my rifle,
picked berries, did a lot o' chores, and worked hard with
my books. It was a full, round life with lots of love and
happiness in it, and I grew, body and mind and spirit, as
free and natural as the big oak trees in the woods pasture.

" Mr. Carmichael had looked up my blood father and had
done what he could for him; but it was no use, and one
winter's morning he was found frozen in an alley. I did n't
learn of it until the next June when he took me down to
the city cemetery where my father and mother lay side by
side. I did feel downcast as we all do in the presence of
death ; but it was n't my real father and mother who were
lyin' there beneath the quiet mounds. Fatherhood and
motherhood are somethin' more than mere physical pro-
cesses. The real fathers and mothers are those who put the
best part o* their lives into makin' the big, gloomy world
into a tender home for all the little ones ; and after my visit
to the graveyard I felt drawn even closer to Dad and Mother
than I had before.

" Children ought to have dogs and bosses and plenty of
air and soil about 'em, Happy, We don't learn from
preachin', we learn from example ; and we can learn a heap
from the animals. We talk about our sanitary systems;
but we alius mean the sanitary systems outside our bodies.
Now, the animals have sanitary systems, but they are inside
their own skins, where they rightly belong. Look at the
beautiful teeth of a dog — These come from eatin' proper
food at the proper time and in proper quantities. If a dog
is n't hungry, the dog won't eat. If a child is n't hungry,
it is fed candy in a lot o' cases, and this is downright
wicked. Of course the animals find it hard to live, crowded
up the way man alius fixes things; but as a rule animals

A REMINISCENCE

are temperate and clean, patient and honest, wise and strong ;
and I wish we 'd use 'em more as instructors for the young.
Most mothers think a dog's tongue is dirty — Why, a
dog's tongue is chemically clean, and healin' in its action;
while the human mouth is generally poisonous — ask a
dentist.

" And a cow's breath, after she has rolled in with sweetly
solemn dignity from the clover field — Ah, that 's a pleas-
ant memory ! I '11 venture to say 'at mighty few monarchs
have been as worthy o' bein' kissed before breakfast, as
Nebukaneezer was while he was undergoin' punishment for
his sins. I had gone to that farm with my soul all stunted
and gnarly ; but it straightened out and shot its little stems
up toward the blue, the same as the stalks o' com did.

" All I had as a start was a love of animals ; and this is
why I alius try to find the one soft spot in a man's nature —
Even if it 's a secret vice, it is something to work on. This
is what makes such a problem of Tyrrel Jones. I can't
find out a single soft place in him ; but I 'm goin' to get
into the heart of him yet, if I can find the way.

" Well, Dad and Mother passed away within a week of
each other a short time after I had been graduated. I had
made up my mind to stay on the farm with 'em as long as
they stayed; although all sorts of voices were callin' to
me from the big outer world; but their daughter lived in
the city, and had been weaned away from the farm, so she
sold it, and I started on my pilgrimage.

" They had left me an income of three hundred and fifty
dollars a year; and I determined to go to college. When
I thought of how rich and full my own life had been made,
after its stunted beginning, I wanted to do all I could to
make the whole earth like that farm had been, and it

FRIAR TUCK

seemed to me that the best way was to become a priest of
the Lord. I tried my best ; but I have been consid'able of
a failure, Happy. Now, I hardly know where I stand. I
am sort of an outcast now, and just doing what seems best
on my own hook.

" A lot of my ideals have been lost, a lot of my hopes
have faded, a lot of my work has seemed like sweeping back
the waves of the sea; but for all I have lost, new things
have taken their place, and I have never lost my faith in
the Lord. Now, I am weak in doctrine and a stranger to
dogma; and the things for which I fight with all my soul
and heart and strength, are kindliness and decency.

" As long as one bein' in the world is cold or hungry or
diseased, every other bein' is liable to become hungry and
cold and diseased. What I am fighting for is a world
without poverty. Most o' the ills of life spring from pov-
erty, and poverty is the result of selfishness and greed.
The earth is reeking with riches, but its bounty is not
divided fairly.

" Happy, if I could only hold up the Lord, so that all
men might see the beauty and fullness of Him, the glory
^nd grandeur of His simple life and His majestic self-sacri-
hce, the fleeting cheapness of material things would sink
to their real value, and we would all become one great
family, workin' together in peace and contentment. Now,
go on to sleep."

It was party late by this time sure enough, and I fell
asleep soon after this ; but I awakened durin' the night and
found myself alone. It was cold when I stuck my nose out
from under the tarp, but it was a wonderful night, clear
and still, with the stars swingin' big and bright just above
my reach.

A REMINISCENCE

As I lay there, I heard Friar Tuck singin* softly to himself
out where the trail dipped down into the valley:

" The night is dark, and I am far from home,
Lead Thou me onl
Keep Thou my feet: I do not ask to see
The distant scene, — one stq> enough for me."

I had never heard his voice so wonderfully beautiful
before; but, my stars, the sadness of it made me choke!
It wasn't just a song, it was a cry; and I knew that it
came from a lonely, bleedin' heart. I put my head under
the covers again, puzzlin' over what was on his mind; but
first thing I knew I was awakened by the glad voice of the
old Friar Tuck, singin' his favorite mornin' hymn : " Bright-
est and best of the sons of the morning " ; so I cooked
breakfast, and he went his way, and I went mine.

CHAPTER SEVEN

HORACE WALPOLE BRADFORD

The Diamond Dot, while it was about the idealest ranch in
the West from most standpoints, ws, run a little loose.
Jabez didn't have any luxurious tastes, and he wasn't
miserly ; so he did n't strain things down to the last penny
— not by a whole lot. All he asked was to have his own
way and be comfortable; and so he alius kept more
punchers 'n he had actual need of, and unless they got jubi-
lant over imposin' on him, he just shut his eyes and grinned
about it.

Takin' his location and outfit into account, and he just
simply could n't help but make money ; so we all had a
fairly easy time of it and grew tender fcelin's, the same as
spoiled children ; which is why we sometimes quit, for we
never had any other excuse for it.

Barbie was a notice-takin' child, if ever the' was one;
and she stood out for company as a general and standin'
order. Company didn't affect ol' Cast Steel one way or
the other; they were just the same to him as a couple o'
hundred head o' ponies, more or less ; and so the news got
out that we alius had a lot of extra beds made up and any
one was welcome to stretch out in 'em who wanted to. The
result o' this was, 'at we drew visitors as easy as molasses
draws flies. I lived at the home house on account o' bein'
Barbie's pal, and so I got into the habit o' bein' a sort of
permanent reception committee. Some o' these visitors was

HORACE WALPOLE BRADFORD 67

a plague to me ; but Jabez did n't like to run any risk of
havin' 'cm ruined beyond repair, so it was generally under-
stood that I had to use ex-treme cantion when I started in
to file the clutch oflF their welcome.

This spring 'at I have in mind, we had as visitor one
o' the eastemest dudes I whs ever tangled up with. He
came out for his health, which is the excuse most of 'em
gives ; but this one took more ways of avoidin' health 'n
airy other of 'em I ever saw. He smoked cigars all day
long, big black ones, strong enough to run a sawmill, he
ate fattenin' food from momin' till night, and when he drove
out in the buckboard to take his exercise, he suffered from
what he called fatigue. He used to sit up as wide awake
as an owl till along about ten every night; and half the
time he didn't crawl out until near seven in the momin'.
He certainly was a pest !

What he complained of most, was his nerves ; and he 'd
sit for hours, talkin' about 'em to anything 'at had ears.
He said the worst of it was, he could n't sleep nights. I
had, of course, heard o' nerves before ever I saw him ; but
I had never heard of 'em tumin' to and devilin" a man, the
way his did ; so at first I was honestly interested, and asked
him all I could think up about 'em ; but after a day or so,
I 'd 'a' been perfectly willin' to put up the coin out o' my
own pocket to have him go to a dentist and have every last
one of his nerves pulled.

I don't begrudge sympathy to any afflicted individual;
but the more I sympathized with this feller, the more affec-
tionate toward me he got ; and he used to trot about after
me, warbilin' out dirges about his nerves until I was tempted
to tie a stone around his neck and lose him down the
cistern.

68 FRIAR TUCK

He ran to lanjfuage. too, this one did. His conversation
was so full of it that a feller could scarcely understand what
he was tryin' to say. He was ferocious! interested in the
ancient Greeks; and if a man succeedcci in wedgin' him
away from his nerves, he began immediate to discourse
about these ancient Greeks. Now, I did nt have a single
thing again' any o' these ancient (Greeks Itcfore this Dude
struck us, none of 'em ever havin' crossed my trail before ; but
they sure did have a rotten outfit o' names, and they were
the most infernal liars 'at ever existed. Three-headed dogs,
and women with snakes for hair, were as common in their
tales as thieves among the Sioux. Barbie did n't have any
use for this Eastener either ; so I decided to fit him out with
a deep-rooted desire for home influences.

I took ol' Tank Williams into my confidence, he bein' the
most gruesome lookin' creature we had in our parts. He was
a big man of curious construction and he had one eye which
ran wild. Tank never knew what this free eye was up to ;
and while he would be examinin' the ground, the free eye
would be gazin' up at a tree as intent as though he had set
it to watch for a crow. Durin' his younger days, Tank had
formed the habit of indulgin' in gang fights as much as
possible, and all of his features had been stampeded out o'
their natural orbits ; but this free eye beat anything I ever
see.

They had him down on his back one time, and he was
gnawin' away contentedly at some feller's thumb, when the
feller reached up his trigger finger and scooped out Tank's
eye. The shape and color weren't hurt a bit; but some
o' the workin' parts got disconnected, so that he could n't
see with it ; but it appeared to be full as good an eye as the
one he looked with.

HORACE WALPOLE BRADFORD 69

All the sleep Tank ever wanted was six huurs out o' the
twenty-four, and he did n't care how he got 'cm — ten min-
utes at a time, or all in one lump. He could sleep sittin' up
straight, or ridin', or stretched out in bed, or most any
way. I think he could sleep while walkin,' though I was
never able to surprise him at it. He agreed to back me up,
3 and Spider Kelley also said he was willin' to do everything

^1 in his power to furnish our guest some pleasant recollec-

1 tions after he 'd gone back to a groove which fitted him

better.

As soon as I began to plan my trip, I started to rehearse
curious secrets about Tank to the Eastener, whose name
was Horace Walpole Bradford. I told Horace that Tank
had a case o' nerves which made his'n seem like a bundle
of old shoe-laces; and that if something wasn't done for
him soon, I feared he was goin' to develop insanity. I said
that even now, it was n't safe to contrary him none, and
that I 'd be a heap easier in my own mind if Tank was cor-
alled up in a cell somewhere, with irons on.

I did n't tell Tank what sort of a disposition I was sup-
plyin' him with for fear he 'd overdo it. Tank did n't
know a nerve from an ingrowin' hair; but when he and
Horace paired off to tell each other their symptoms, I '11
have to own up that his tales of anguish an' suflferin' made
Horace's troubles sound like dance music.

I told Horace that a trip through the mountains would
soothe and invigorate him, until he 'd be able to sleep,
hangin' by his toes like a bat; but the trouble was to find
something which interested him enough to lure him on the
trip. There was a patent medicine almanac at the place,
and I studied up its leamin' until I had it at my tongue's
end, and I also used a lot o' Friar Tuck's health theories;

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TO FRIAR TUCK

so that I got Horace interested enough to talk my ear-
drums callous; but not enough to take the trip.

I did n't know much about nerves ; but I was as familiar
with sleep as though I had graduated from eleven medical
colleges, and I knew if he would just follow my directions,
it would give him such an appetite for slumber that he 'd
drop into it without rememberin' to close his eyelids. Ol'
Jabez happened to mention an Injun buryin' ground with
the members reposin' on top o' pole scaffolds, and this
proved to be the bait. Horace wanted to see this, and it
was a four days' drive by buckboa'-d; so I heaved a sigh
o' relief and prepared to do my duty.

When all was ready, we packed our stuff in the good buck-
board, putting in an extra saddle for the accident we felt
sure was goin' to happen. Spider started as driver, while
I rode behind, leadin' a horse with Tank's saddle on, though
Horace thought it was Spider's. We had told him that it
made our backs ache to ride in a buckboard all day, so we
would change off once in a while. Horace wanted to do the
drivin' himself ; but we pointed out that he was n't used to
our kind o' roads, and consequently favored the little hills
too much. He was inhumanly innocent, and it was almost
like feedin' a baby chalk and water.

We trotted along gentle, until the rear spring came loose
goin' down a little dip to a dry crick bed, about ten miles
out. We talked it over and decided 'at the best plan would
be for Spider to drive back and get the old buckboard ; so
after unloadin' our stuff, I took the tap out o* my pocket,
fixed the spring, tied a rope about it to deceive Horace, and
Spider drove back for the old buckboard which had been
discarded years before, but which we had fixed up for this
trip and painted until it looked almost safe to use.

HORACE WALPOLE BRADFORD 71

Before long we saw the buckboard comin' back; but
much to our surprise, Tank WilHams was drivin' it, an'
givin' what he thought was the imitation of a nervous man.
He would stand up an' yell, crack his mule-skinner, and send
the ponies along on a dead run. He came up to us, and said
that he had had an attack o' nerves, had n't slept a wink the
night before; and when Spider Kelley had refused to let
him go in his place, he had torn him from the seat an' had
trampled him.

" I trampled him," sez Tank solemnly, his free eye lookin'
straight into tne sun. " I hope I did n't destroy him ; but
in my frenzy I trampled him."

Horace looked worried. " Tank," sez I soothin'ly, " we
don't really need any one else along. You just help us to
load, an' then go back, like a good feller."

Tank stood up on the seat, an' held the whip ready. " My
life depends on me takin' this trip ! " he yelled. " My life
depends on it ; it depends on it, I tell you. My life depends
on me takin' this trip ! "

He went on repeatin' about his life dependin' on his takin'
that trip, until I made a sign to Horace, and said 'at we 'd
better let him go along. Horace wasn't ambitious to be
trampled; so he concluded to concur, an' climbed into the
seat beside Tank. Any one else would 'a' noticed that it
was Tank's saddle on the boss I was leadin'; but Horace
never noticed anything which wasn't directly connected
with his own body. He did n't even have any idee that the
sun had set habits in the matter o' risin' an' scttin' — which
was another fact I had took into account.

We were drivin' four broncs to the buckboard, an' they
was new to the game and in high spirits. Tank was also
in high spirits, an' we went at a clip which was inspirin', even

72 FRIAR TUCK

to sound nerves. We did our level best to give Horace
somethin' real to worry about, an' from the very start his
nerves was so busy handin' in idees an' sensations that his
mind was took up with these instead of with the nerves
themselves as was usual.

Well, we sure had a delightful ride that afternoon : every
time 'at Horace would beseech Tank to be more careful in
swingin' around down-hill curves, Tank would seize him by
the arm with his full squeezin' grip, an' moan : " It 's my
nerves, my pore nerves. This is one o' the times when I *m
restive, I got to have action; my very life depends on it!
Whoop, hit 'em up — Whee ! " an' he 'd crack his mule-
skinner about the ears o' the ponies, an' we 'd have another
runaway for a spell.

Horace had n't the mite of an idee in which direction he
was travelin'; all he did was to hang on and hope. The
confounded buckboard was tougher 'n we had figured on,
and it didn't bust until near dark. As they went up the
slope, I could see the left hind wheel weavin' purty rapid,
an' as they tore down the grade to Cottonwood Crick, things
began to creak an' rattle most threatenin'. We had decided
to camp on the crick, an' Tank swung up his team with a
flourish. The hind wheel couldn't stand the strain, an'
when it crumbled, Horace, an' the rest o' the baggage, whip-
crackered off like a pinwheel. Of course when one wheel
went, the others dished in company, an' the whole thing
was a wreck.

The ponies were comfortable weary, an' after I had roped
one an' the rest had fallen over him, we soothed 'em down
without much trouble, an' started to make camp. Horace
was all in, an' was minded to sit on his shoulder blades an'
rest; but this wasn't part o' the plan, an' we made him

HORACE WALPOLE BRADFORD 73

hustle like a new camp-boy. As soon as supper was over,
he lit a cigar, an' prepared to take a rest. We had decided
that those big, black cigars wasn't best for his nerves, so
we had smuggled out the box, an' had worked a little sul-
phur into all but the top row. He lit his cigar and gave
us one apiece, but he was so sleepy he could n't keep his on
fire ; and it was comical to watch him.

Every time he 'd nod off. Tank would utter an exclama-
tion, an' walk up an' down, rubbin' his hands an' cussin'
about his nerves. Horace was dead tired from bein'
jounced about on the buckboard all day; but he was wor-
ried about Tank, an' this would wake him effectual.

About ten o'clock I sez : " Tank, what happened that
night when you got nervous up in the Spider Water
country ? "

" Oh, don't ask me, don't ask me," sez Tank, gittin' up an'
walkin' oiT into the darkness.

" I wish to glory he had n't come along," I sez to Horace.
" I fear we 're goin' to have trouble ; but chances are that
a good night's rest '11 quiet him, all right."

Purty soon Tank came back, lit his pipe, an' sat facin'
Horace with his lookin' eye, an' everything else in the land-
scape with his free one. " You know how it is with nerves,"
he sez to Horace. " You perhaps, of all them I have ever
met up with, know how strained and twisted nerves fill a
man's heart with murder, set his teeth on edge and put the
taste of blood in his throat ; so I 'm goin' to tell the whole
o' that horrid experience, which I have never yet confided to
a livin' soul before. Have you got a match ? "

Tank's pipe alius went out at the most interestin' times;
and he could n't no wise talk without smokin'. We all knew
this; so whenever Tank got headed away on a tale, we

FRIAR TUCK

heaved questions at him, just to see how many matches we
could make him burn. He 'd light a match and hold it to
his pipe; but he alius lit oflf an idee with the match, and
when he 'd speak out the idee, he 'd blow out the match.
Or else he 'd be so took up by his own talkin', he 'd hold the
match until it burnt his fingers; then, without shuttin' off
his discourse, he 'd moisten the fingers on his other hand,
take the bu.-nt end of the match careful, and hold it until it
was plumb burnt up, without ever puttin' it to his pipe. I
did n't want to waste matches on this trip so I told Horace
to hand Tank his cigar. Horace had already wasted two
cigars, besides the ones he had given us ; and I wanted him
to get to the sulphur ones as soon as convenient.

Tank's mind was preoccupied with the tale we had made
up ; so he took Horace's fresh cigar, lit his pipe by it, threw
the cigar into the fire, and said moodily: "He was un-
obligin'. Yes, that cross-grained old miner was un-
obligin'. Of course, I wouldn't have done it if I hadn't
been nervous ; but I say now, as I 've alius thought, that
he brought it on himself by bein' unobligin'."

Tank's gloomy tones had wakened Horace up complete;
and as he started to light another cigar, I got ready for bed.
" You two have already got nerves," I sez to 'em ; " but I
don't want to catch 'em so I '11 sleep alone, and you can
bunk together." I unrolled my tarp close to the fire and
crawled into it, intendin' to take my rest while I listened
to Tank unfold his story.

It was a clean, fresh night, just right for sleepin' ; and it
almost seemed a shame to put that innocent little Eastener
through his treatment; but it was for his own good so I
stretched out with a sigh o' content, and looked at the other
two by the fire.

HORACE WALPOLE BRADFORD 75

Horace was short and fat around the middle with stringy
arms and legs. He wore some stuff he called side-burns
on his face. They started up by his ears, curved along his
jaws and were fastened to the ends of his stubby mustache.
He kept 'em cropped short and, truth to tell, they were an
evil-lookin' disfigurement, though he did n't seem to feel
a mite o' shame at wearin' 'em. His face was full o* trouble,
and yet he was so sleepy he had to hitch his eyebrows clear
up to his hair to keep his eyes open. Tank's face never did
have what could rightly be called expressions. His features
used to fall into different kinds o' convulsions; but they
were so mussed up it was impossible to read 'em. I looked
at these two a minute, and then I had to pull my head under
the tarp to keep from laughin'.

CHAPTER EIGHT

A CASE OF NEKVES

" I WAS all alone," sez Tank. " I had been up in the Spider
Water country lookin' for a favorite ridin* pony; but my
boss broke a leg, and I packed my saddle and stuff on my
head until my nerves began to swell. Then I threw the stuff
away and hunted for a human. I roamed for weeks without
comin' across a white man, and my nerves got worse an'
worse. You know how it is with nerves ; how they set up
that dull ache along the back o* your spinal cord until you
get desperate, and long to bite and scratch and tear your
feller-bein's to pieces — well, I had 'em worse this time 'n
ever I had 'em before ; and they loosened up my brain-cells
until my self-control oozed out and I longed to fling myself
over a cliff. Have you got a match ? "

Horace passed over his fresh cigar, and Tank lit his pipe
and tossed this cigar into the fire also. Horace looked at it
sadly for a moment ; but he was game, and lit another.

" Finally," sez Tank, " I caivri upon a lonely cabin at the
bottom of a gorge; and in it was a little man who was
minin' for gold. He was about your build, except that
toilin' with pick and shovel had distributed his meat around
to a better advantage, and he wore his whiskers complete,
without any patch scraped off the chin. It was just night
when I reached the cabin, and he invited me in to eat ; which
I am free to say I did until I was stuffed up to my swaller,
and then we prepared to sleep.

A CASE OF NERVES 'J^

" Now, a feller would nachely think I 'd 'a' gone right
to sleep; but instead o' this, my nerves began to twist an'
squirm an' gnaw at me until I was almost beside myself;
and after fightin' it for several hours, I woke up the miner,
and asked him as polite as a lady, if he would n't rub my
brow for a few minutes. Seems like when I 'm nervous,
the' won't nothin' soothe me so quick as to have my brow
rubbed; but this little coyote refused pointblank to do it,

" I finally got down on my knees and begged him to ;
but he still refused. He said he had fed rne six meals at
once and given me shelter, and this was as far as he 'd go
if my confounded nerves exploded and blew the place up.
I was meek about it, I tried my best to ward off trouble;
but just then a nerve up under my ear gave a wrench which
twisted me all out o' shape, and I lost patience. I seized
that little cuss by the beard and I yanked him out on the
floor, and I said to him — "

Tank had once been unusual gifted in framin' up bright-
colored profanity, but he had been shuttin' down on it since
the night he had helped to fake the hold-up on the Friar, and
I thought he had lost the knack. This night, though, he
seemed to find a spiritual uplift in tellin' to Horace exactly
what he had said to the lonely miner. Before he finished
this part, he had used up all of Horace's good cigars, as
lighters, and the Fastener's face had turned a palish blue,
I 'd be willin' to bet that Tank made the swearin' record that
night ; though of course, the' ain't any way to prove it.

When Tank could n't think of any new combinations, he
covered his face and broke into tears, Horace sat and
looked at him with his eyes poppin' out, " Don't you think
you could go to sleep? " he asked after a bit,

"Sleep!" yelled Tank. "Sleep? I doubt if I ever do

■Hi

78 FRIAR TUCK

sleep again. I feel worse right now 'n I did that night in
the gorge."
*' What did you finally do that time?" asked Horace.
" I hate to think of it," sez Tank ; and he put his elbows
on his knees, his chin in his hands, and stared into the fire
as though seein' ghosts.

Horace watched him a while, and then he lit a cigar out
of the second layer. He took one puff and then removed
the cigar and stared at it. He tried another puff, and then
threw it into the fire, where it spluttered up in a blue flame.
He tried six more, and then said somethin' I could n't quite
catch and threw the whole box into the fire; while Tank
continued to stare into it as though he had forgot the' was
any one else on earth.

" Let 's go to bed," sez Horace.

" Have you got a match ? " sez Tank, lookin' around with
a start. Horace took a bumin' stick from the fire, and Tank
lit his pipe with it ; and from that on Horace kept a lighted
stick handy.

" How in thunder did you get to sleep that night in the
gorge?" demanded Horace, who was gettin' impatient.

" Well," sez Tank, " after I had told this unobligin' little
cuss exactly what I thought of him, he pulled out a gun and
tried to shoot me — actually tried to shoot me in his own
cabin, where I was his guest. My feelin's were hurt worse 'n
they 'd ever been hurt before ; but still I tried to calm
myself ; and if it had n't been for my nerves, I 'd ht /e gone
out into that gorge in the dead o* night, and never set eyes
on his evil face again ; but I could n't get control of myself,
so I took his gun away from him and knocked him down
with it. When he regained consciousness, he was in a re-
pentant mood ; and he consented to rub my head.

A CASE OF NERVES 79

" He rubbed my head a while an' I sank into a dreamless,
health-given repose ; but as soon as I was asleep, the traitor-
ious sneak crept out an' started to run. I fled after him as
swift as I could, an' caught him about two a. m. I had to
twist his arms to make him come back with me; but when
I had once got him back to the shack, I tied him good an'
tight, an' made him rub my brow again. When he 'd rub
slow an' gentle, I 'd sleep peaceful an' quiet ; but the minute
he 'd quit, why, I 'd wake up again ; so he rubbed an'
rubbed an' rubbed " — Tank smoothed his left hand gentle
with his right, an' spoke slow an' whispery ~ " an' I slept
an' slept an' slept an' — "

The darn cuss said it so soothin' an' natural, that hanged
if I did n't fall asleep myself, though the last I remember,
I was bitin' my lips so I could stay awake an' see the fun.
I must have been asleep full an hour before I was woke up
by Tank's voice, raised in anger. I stuck my nose out o'
the tarp, an' there was Tank kneelin' straddle o' the other
bed which he had rolled up in the shape of a man. Horace
was standin' close by with his hands on his hips an' lookin'
altogether droopy.

" I raised his head from the floor, like this," said Tank,
i.llustratin' with the bed, " an' then I beat it down on the
planks o' the floor ; an' then I raised it up again, an' then
I beat it down, an' then I raised it up — "

I had to stuflt a corner o' the soogan into my mouth to
keep from laughin' out loud at the expression in Horace's
eyes: but Tank kept raisin' that poor head an' beatin' it
down again for so long that I fell asleep again without
intendin' to.

The next time I woke up Horace was speakin'. He was
so earnest about it that at first 1 thought he had been

FRIAR TUCK

weepin' ; but he was simply tryin' to make his voice winnin*
an' persuadish.

"1*11 rub it," he sez. "I'll rub it soft an' gentle,
just like you say you want it rubbed. Come on, let
me rub it." I looked at Tank with his free eye rollin'
about as though it was follerin' the antics of a delirious
mosquito ; and I 'd just about as soon have rubbed the
brow of a porcupine; but Horace was all perked up with
sympathy.

•' No," sez Tank, sadly. " You 're a guest, an' it would n't
be polite. If you was a stranger, now, why, I 'd choke your
heart out but what I made you rub it ; but not a guest. No,
I could n't do that. I 'd wake Happy up an' make him rub
it ; but he alius sleeps with a gun under his head, an' he 's
apt to shoot before he 's full awake."

" Well, just let me try it a while," sez Horace.

" I 'm feared to," sez Tank, beginnin' to weaken. " If
you was to start, an' I was to fall asleep, an' you was to
quit, I might dream 'at you was that unobligin' man which
betrayed me back in the lonely shack ; an' I might strangle
you or somethin' before I came to my senses. Nope, the
best plan is just to sit an' chat here till daylight. My nerves
is alius better after sun-up."

" I don't think I can stay awake much longer," sez Horace,
almost whimperin'.

"What?" sez Tank in surprise. "You claim to have
nerves, an' yet you can talk o' fallin' asleep at this time o'
night. Great Scott, man, you ain't got no nerves ! You are
as flebmatic as a horn toad. Oh, I wish I could just fall
sleepy for one minute."

" Let me try rubbin' your brow," sez Horace, whose eyes
were blinkin' for sleep, but whose face was all screwed up

A CASE OF NERVES

into lines of worry at what was goin' to happen to him after
he had finally give in an' drifted oflF.

" Well," sez Tank, " I '11 let you try ; but if you 're already
sleepy, I doubt if any good comes of it. You sit there at
the head o' the bed, an' I '11 lay my head in your lap, an* you
rub my brow soft an' gentle. If I do get to slcepin' natural,
why o' course the* won't be no harm done in you takin' a
few winks ; but for the love o' peace, don't sleep sound."

I blame near choked while they were gcttin' settled,
'cause Horace was one o' those finicky cusses, an' Tank's
head looked like a moth-eaten buffalo robe. Finally, how-
ever. Tank stretched out with the covers up around his neck
an' his head pillowed in Horace's lap, and then Horace began
to rub his brow as soft an' gentle as he knew how.

" You don't do it clingy enough," sez Tank. " You want
to just rest your fingers lightly, but still have 'em draw along
so 'at they '11 give a little tingle. There, that 's better. Now
then, I '11 lay as quiet as I can, an' try to go to sleep." Tank
was doin' such an earnest job, he had plumb fooled himself
into believin' it was mostly true.

He gave a start after layin* quiet for five or ten minutes,
an' this put Horace on edge again; but Tank didn't wake
up. Horace had a saddle blanket ar jund his shoulders ; and
the last I saw just before I fell asleep, myself, was Horace
gently rubbin' Tank's brow, an' lookin* down careful for a
change of expression. They made a curious sight with the
firelight back of 'em.

It was grayin' up for the dawn next time I woke up ; and
I 'd had my sleep out, but when I stuck my nose out from
under the tarp, I found it purty tol'able frosty. I knew it
was my duty to roust out an' keep Horace from gettin' more
sleep 'n my treatment for his nerves called for ; but I was

82 FRIAR TUCK

too comfortable to pay much heed to the still, small voice of
duty. At the same time I was curious to see what my boon
comrades was up to, so I stretched my neck an' took a look
at 'em.

Horace had keeled over so that his elbow rested on Tank's
chest an' his head rested on his hand; but the other hand
was still on Tank's brow, an' I reckon Horace must have
rubbed until he didn't care whether it was sleep or death
he drew, just so he got rid o' keepin' awake. Tank had
reached up one hand so it circled Horace's waist ; and they
made the most lovable group a body ever see.

While I was still watchin' 'em, Horace's arm gave out, ati*
he settled down on top o' Tank's nose. In about two minutes
Tank came to with a jump, an' heaved Horace to the foot
of the bed. Tank was really startled, an' he came to his feet
glarin'. " You blame little squab, you ! " he yelled. " What
are you tryin' to do — smother me ? "

Horace staggered to his feet, but he could n't get his eyes
open more 'n a narrow slit. " I did n't do it on purpose, Mr.
Williams," he blubbled like a drunk man. " I rubbed until
I thought my hand would fall off at the wrist ; but I reckon
I must 'a' dropped asleep. Lie down again, an' I '11 rub
/ou some more."

" Too late," sez Tank, " too late, too late. I never c .
sleep while daylight 's bumin' ; but still, my nerves don't
get so dangerous until after nightfall; so we'll just turn
to an' get breakfast."

Well, I got up after yawnin' a few times ; and after askin'
if they had had a restful night, I started to get breakfast.
Horace staggered about, gettin' wood an' water an' doin'
what he was able to, while Tank wrangled in the bosses.

After breakfast, which I must say for Horace, he et in

A CASE OF NERVES

able shape, we started to saddle up, puttin' the spare saddle
on the hoss I had rode the day before. " Which one o' you
is goin' back after the other buckboard ? " asked Horace.

" Why, we ain't goin' back at all," sez I. " It 's full fifty
miles, an' we can't keep switchin' buckboards every day on
a trip like this. We '11 just ride the ponies the rest o' the
way."

" Ride ? " sez Horace. " Ride I "

CHAPTER NINE

TREATING THE CASE

Horace started to enlarge on how much he didn't know
about ridin' ; but Tank breaks in with a plea for his nerves.
"Look here," he said, scowlin' at Horace with his good
eye, while the free one rove around wild in his face, " your
nerves are a little out o' fix, an' mine is plumb tied into knots.
This here outin' will be the best thing we can do for our-
selves, an' you got to come along. No matter which way
you go, you got to ride ; so the' ain't no sense in makin' a
fuss about it. We '11 mount you up on as gentle a cayuse as
the' is in the West ; an' we won't tell no one if you hang on
to the saddle horn goin' down hill."

" That 's right, Mr. Bradford," sez I respectful. " You 'd
have to ride back anyway, so you might as well come on
with us an' have a pleasant outing."

" Besides," sez Tank, " up there in the Wind River
country we stand a chance o' gettin' somethin' for our
nerves, if the Injuns happen to be in a good humor. Those
Injun doctors know all about hurbs an' which diseases they
grow for, an' when they 're in a good humor, they '11 sell
ya some."

" What '11 they do if they 're not in a good humor? " asked
Horace.

"Well, that's the beatin'est question I've yet heard!"
sez Tank. " How does any one know what an Injun '11 do
when he 's not in a good humor ? I don't reckon any one

ti'

TREATING THE CASE 85

ever tried to learn the answer to that question. When an
Injun 's not in a good humor, either you 've got to kill him
or he '11 kill you. If we hear tell 'at they 're out o' humor,
we'll simply scurry back at the first hint, an' don't you
forget it."

Horace was n't resigned yet ; so he kept sawin' away with
his questions all the time we v/ere tyin' on the beds an' grub.
The grass had been purty brown down below, but it was fat
an' green up above, an' the ponies felt fine. We had picked
out good ones, an' it took some time to get 'em wore down
to where they was willin' to pack; but by seven o'clock
we were ready to start, an' then Tank lifted Horace into the
saddle, while I held the pony's head. We had chose a steady
old feller for Horace, because we didn't want any serious
accidents. Ol' Cast Steel was dead again' sheepin' the East-
eners, an' I knew they'd be doin's about what we'd done
already, let alone havin' any sort of a mishap.

We told Horace just what to do to save himself, an' we
fixed his stirrups to just fit him ; but he took it purty hard.
It takes a ridin'-man a couple o' weeks to harden up after
he 's laid off a spell ; but when a man begins to do his first
ridin' at forty, it comes ex-tremely awkward. Horace was
the first feller I ever saw get sea-sick on hossback ; but he
certainly did have a bad attack. I suppose it was the best
thing 'at could have happened to him, an' after he was
emptied out, he rode some easier. We only covered about
thirty miles that day altogether, an' Tank had plenty o' time
to get all the sleep he could use ; but when he came to lift
Horace down from the saddle, Horace couldn't make his
legs stiff enough to stand on.

We let him stretch out while we were makin' camp ; but
he fell asleep, so we had to wake him up to help get supper.

FRIAR TUCK

I was beginnin' to feel sorry for him, but he had pestered us
regardless about his nerves, an' I knew 'at pity for him
now would be the worse for him in the long run.

After supper, Horace spent consid'able time in bewailin'
his fate because he had got disgusted an' thrown his whole
box o' cigars into the fire. " I 've got an extra pipe, if you *d
like to try that," sez Tank. " It 's lots better for the nerves
than cigars — though from what I can tell o' you, you ain't
bothered much with nerves. I wish to glory I was in your
skin."

" Oh, man," sez Horace, " you can't imagine how I suffer.
I ache like a sore tooth all over, an' it gives me a cute pain
just to sit here on the grass."

" Sit on the saddle-blankets," sez Tank, sympathetic. As
soon as Horace had piled up the blankets an' sat down on
'em, groanin' most bitter. Tank sez with feelin' : " Gee, how
I envy you. You have nothin' but a few muscle-aches and
chafed skin an' such, while my nerves is beginnin' to
threaten me again. I 'm not goin' to bother either o' you
fellers, though. I 'm goin' to have you tie me to a tree to-
night if I can't sleep."

Horace filled the pipe, which was an ancient one, bitter
as gall ; but when he began to smoke, his face became almost
satisfied. The pipe was purty well choked up, so that he had
some bother in keepin' it goin', but after we 'd run a grass
stem through it, it worked purty well, an' we was right
sociable until along about nine o'clock, when I got sleepy,
myself. Then Tank began to worry about his nerves.
Horace had about forgot his own nerves, he was sufferin'
so from Tank's.

When we see that Horace could n't keep awake any longer
without bein' tortured. Tank began to carry on fiercer. He

TREATING THE CASE

rumpled up his hair, gave starts an' jerks, but the thing 'at
worked best, was just to sit an' look at his fingers, an' pick
at 'em. He 'd form a circle with his left thumb and fore-
finger, then poke his right finger through this circle and try
to grab it with his right hand before it could back out. It
was the craziest thing I 'd ever seen ; but before long Horace
got to tryin' it hims^^lf. While Tank was lookin' at his
fingers with his good eye, the free one rambled around, an*
half the time it rested on Horace, an' fair gave him the
creeps; but when I couldn't stay awake myself, I gave
Tank the sign, an' he got delirious.

" I can't sleep," he wailed, " I can't sleep ! My nerves,
oh, my nerves ! One minute they 're like hot wires, an' the
next they 're like streaks of ice. You '11 have to tie me up,
boys, you certainly will have to tie me up."

I argued again' it as bein' inhuman ; but Tank begged so
that finally I gave in, an' we tied him to a down pine tree.
Horace helped to tie hiu. an' he sure did his best to make
a good job of it. I was a little doubtful, myself, about
Tank gettin' loose ; but he had blowed up his muscles, an'
he coughed me the all-right signal, so me an' Horace
turned in.

Horace groaned consid'able while stretchin' out; but he
began to snore before I had got through findin' the soft
place. When I first go to bed, I like to roll about a bit, an'
stretch, an' loosen up my muscles — I like to stay awake
long enough to feel the tired spots '•" k down again' the
earth, an' sort o' ooze into it ; and be I had drifted off,
Horace was buzzin' away at a log in great shape.

I must 'a' slept an hour when I was wakened by a bright
light, an' lookin' out, I saw Tank Williams standin' with
his back to the fire an' glowerin' down at Horace. " As soon

FRIAR TUCK

as this log burns oflF, I 'm goin' to get you," sez Tank between
set teeth.

'What are you goin' to get me for?" asked Horace.
" You asked me to tie you to it. I did n't want to tie you
to it, but you insisted. I 'U untie you if you want me to,
and rub your brow again."

" It 's too late," muttered Tank. " It 's too infernal late.
Nothin' could put me to sleep now. As soon as this log
bums off, I 'm goin' to get you. You was the one which
brought back my nerve trouble, an' you are the one what
has to suffer."

Tank had n't been able to free himself from the pine tree ;
so he had dragged it in an' across the fire. It was n't such
a big one as trees go; but it was a mighty big one for a
man, tied to it as he was, to tote along. Horace reasoned
with him a while longer, an' then when he saw that the
trunk was about burned through, he got purty well off to
one side, an' threw a chunk at me. I popped out of bed on
the instant, an' began to shoot about promiscuous; so as
to live up to my reputation.

When I 'd emptied my gun, I looked at Tank, as though
seein' him for the first time, an' sez : " What in thunder
da you mean, by raisin' all this havoc ? "

" My nerves," sez Tank, " my pore nerves. I can't sleep,
an' I can't keep my senses if I 'm left tied to this tree any
longer. It 's all his fault, an' as soon as this log burns up,
I 'm goin' ta hunt him down."

Tank an' I argued fierce as long as we could think of any-
thing to say ; an' just as the dead pine was gettin' too hot
for Tank to stand it any longer, Horace calls in from the
darkness, " Don't you want me to rub your brow a while
an' see if that won't put you to sleep? "

TREATING THE CASE 89

" Come in here," I sez, cross. " This man is liable to kill
himself, an' you know more about nerves 'n I do."

Horace crawled out from behind a big rock, came in,
shiverin' with the cold; an' we untied Tank from the log.
He had managed to get his feet loose; but his hands had
,| been tied behind him an' when they got cold, he couldn't

make a go of it. " Well," sez I, as soon as Tank was free,
" what are you goin' to do now ? "

" I move we get up the bosses, an' start at once," sez
Tank. " I don't trust myself any longer, an' we can ride
faster at night. My one hope, is to get to an Injun doctor,
or else get so tired out that I can fall into a dreamless
sleep."

"Why don't you ride alone?" demanded Horace with a
sudden burst of intelligence. " Why don't you ride alone ;
an' then you could ride as fast as you wanted to, an' if you
found the Injuns out o' humor, you could come back an'
let us know."

This set us back for a minute: we had been playin'
Horace for bein' utterly thought-loose ; but he had figured
out the best plan the' was, an' his eyes were bright an' eager.

" Take the boss that 's fastened on the rope here," Horace
went on; "an' we can take the manacled bosses in the
momin' and foller ya. Yes, that 's the best plan."

You see the fact was, we were only twenty or twenty-
five miles from the ranch house. We had been circlin' an'
zig-zaggin' through the hills, an' at night we hung up
Horace's pony on a picket an' put hobbles on the balance.
Bein' fooled on direction was n't any sign of Horace bein' a
complete lunkhead ; I 've known a heap o' wise ones get
balled up in the mountains.

Tank stood puzzlin' over it with his free eye trottin' about

til

FRIAR TUCK

in a circle ; but he could n't think any way out of it. " All
right," sez he, " if you two can get along without me, why,
I '11 risk my life by bein' a scout."

" Nonsense," sez Horace ; " the Injuns have n't riz for
years, an' they 're not likely to again."

Tank only winked his lookin' eye, an' proceeded to fling
the saddle on the picketed boss. Horace was smilin' purty
contented with himself, until I sez : " Which boss are you
goin' to ride to-morrow, Mr. Bradford ? "

Then his face went blank as he recalled the blow-up we 'd
had that mornin' gettin' the pack ponies contented with their
loads. " By Jove, I can't ride any of them ! " he exclaims.
" It would kill me to have a boss buck with me. I 'm so sore
now I can hardly move."

" You don't look as nervous as you did, though," I sez to
him for comfort.

He did n't pay me no heed, " Here, Williams," he calls,
" you can't take that boss. He 's the only one I can ride,
and you '11 have to catch another."

" You ort have thought o' that before," sez Tank, goin'
on with his arrangements, but movin' slow.

" Well, } ou two straighten it out among yourselves," sez
I. " I 'm gom' back to bed. No wonder you 're nervous.
It would make a saw-horse nervous to jibe around the way
you two do."

I went oflf grumblin', an' I went to sleep before they settled
it; but Tank stretched it out as much as he could, an'
Horace didn't oversleep any that night. Next mornin'
when I looked out, I saw him tied up with his back again'
a tree, an' Tank's head in his lap. He was swathed in his
sHc ♦• an' saddle-blanket to keep warm, an' was sound
asleep. He looked purty well hammered out, but hanged if

TREATING THE CASE 91

he did n't look a lot more worth while 'n he did when he
started to take my treatment.

It seemed a shame to do it, as it was just gettm' into the
gray ; but I woke him up, an' asked him in a whisper what
he was doin'. He sat an' blinked at me for a full minute
before he remembered what or where he was, an' then he
told me that he finally induced Tank to try havin' his head
rubbed again, by lettin' Tank truss him up so he couldn't
keel over on him. " Gee. but I 'm cold an' stiff," he sez in
a husky, raspin' voice. " I don't see how it can be so hot
daytimes, an' so cold nights."

" This '11 do you a world of good, Mr. Bradford," sez I.
" You see, you swell up with the heat daytimes, an' crimp
down with the cold nights ; an' this will goad on your circu-
lation, fry the lard out o' ya, an' give your nerves a chance
to get toned up." I quoted from the patent medicine alma-
nac occasional, just so he wouldn't forget he was takin'
treatment.

" I can't possibly ride, to-day," he sez, shakin' his head.
" Honest, I 'm in agony."

" That 's just 'cause you 're stiff," sez I, kindly. " That '11
all wear off when the sun softens up your joint-oil. Why,
man, you '11 look back on this trip as one o' the brightest
spots in your whole life."

" I got hit in the back o' the head with a golf ball once,"
he flares back real angry ; " an' that showed me a lot o*
brightness, too. I don't want no more brightness, an' I
don't intend to ride to-day."

I was especial pleased at the human traits he was dis-
playin'. He had n't acted so healthy an' natural since he 'd
been with us, an' I was encouraged to keep on with the treat-
ment. " You will have to ride with us, even if we have to

FRIAR TUCK

n )

tie you on," I sez. " We are now close to the Injun country,
an* we're responsible for you. O' course the' ain't any
danger from regular war parties ; but Injun boys is just as
full o' devilment as white boys, an' they haven't as many
safety valves. They 're all the time sneakin* off an' playin* at
war, an' they play a purty stiff game, too, believe me. If
a dozen o' these young bucks, eighteen or twenty years old,
was to stalk us, they 'd try most earnest to lift our hair."

'* I 'd as soon be killed one way as another," he sez. " I
can't stand it to ride, an' that 's all the' is to it."

Here was a queer thing: the little cuss actually wasn't
af eared of Injuns, which I had counted on as my big card.
Nerves or no nerves, Horace Walpole Bradford was n't no
coward; 'cause we are all afeared o' crazy folks, an' he
thought Tank was crazy. If Tank had had two good eyes,
chances are he would n't 'a' feared him ; so I kicked Tank
in the side an' woke him up.

CHAPTER TEN

lit

INJUNs!

Well, we sure had a hard time gettin' Horace in the saddle
that day. He was some Hke a burro, small but strong minded.
Finally he agreed to try it if we would put the saddle-
blanket on top the saddle instead of underneath.

" The boss don't need it as bad as I do," sez he; " 'cause
he 's covered all over with hoss-hide an' has hair for paddin'
besides ; and furthermore, the saddle is lined with sheepskin
underneath, while it 's as hard as iron on top; and I 'm just
like a boil wherever I tourV it."

We told him that a 1.. saddle was lots the easiest as
soon as a feller got used to it; but he broke in an' sn'l he
did n't expect to live that long, an' that we could take
choice of leavin' him, or puttin' the saddle-blanket on top.
The's lots of folks with the notion that a soft saddle or a
soft chair or a soft bed is the easiest ; an' it ain't much use
to argue with 'em, though the truth is, that if a feller lived
on goslin' down, he 'd get stuck with a pinfeather some day
an' die o' loss of blood ; while if he lived on jagged stones,
he'd finally wear into 'em until he had a smooth, perfct
fittin' mold for his body. Still, the truth is only the tr'^
to them 'at can see it; so we put the blanket on top, an'
perched Horace astride it.

He stood it two hours, an' then said it was stretchin' his
legs so 'at he was af eared a sudden jerk would split him to
the chin ; an' then we put the saddle on right, an' he found

FRIAR TUCK

it full as easy as it had been the day before. The best way,
an' the easiest an' the quickest, to toughen up, is just to
toughen up. The human bo<ly can stand almost anything
in the way o' hardship. After it has sent up word, hour
after hour, that it is bein' hurt, an' no attention ge^s paid
to it, why, it sets to work to remedy things on its own hook.
In order to ride comfortable, a lot of muscles have to loosen
an' stretch. Most o' the pain in ridin' comes from ridin'
with set muscles. A feller can't balance easy with set
muscles, it's just one strainin' jerk after another, an' the
trick o' ridin' is to move with the horse. Just as soon as ya
get to goin' right along with the boss, loose an' rubbery, you
take the strain off o' both you an' him ; but while you 're
bumpin' again' him, it 's painful for both.

We rode about forty miles that day ; and at the end of it
Horace was n't complainin' any worse 'n at the start. Well,
he could n't, as far as that goes ; but his body had already
begun to find the motion o* the boss. Of course he had n't
learned to balance, an' he still rode rigid ; but we had give
him an easy-gaited old hammock, an' when we drew up to
make camp, he sat on his boss without holdin' to the horn,
an' said he was beginnin' to like it. When Tank lifted him
down, though, his legs wobbled under him like rubber an'
he squashed down in a heap, groanin'. We let him sleep
where he lit while we were gettin' supper; 'cause we was
sure he would need it before mornin'. He was n't nervous
any longer ; all he wanted was food, sleep, an' a lung full
o' tobacco smoke. I felt rather proud o' my treatment.

Tank had to boot him about purty freely to waken him
up enough to take his vittles ; but he took a good lot of 'em,
an' I was glad of it, 'cause this was the night the Injuns
were goin' to attack us, an' he was a't scheduled lo have any

INJUNSI 9S

more solid nourshment until we got back to the ranch
house. After supper he went to his pipe Hke a young duck
to a pudule o' water. He had n't learned to handle his mois-
ture while smokin' a pipe, an' when the pipe began to gargle,
he muttered a little cuss-word under his breath. H. Walpole
Bradford was cumin' uut wonderful.

The stifTcnin' had all blew out o' the rim of his hat, givin'
the sun full swing at him, an' his nose looked like a weakly
tomato Bung in a bed o' geraniums. He had wrinkled up his
face around where his glasses fit, an' now with the sun gone
down his skin had loosened up again, showin' the inhumed
wrinkles like painted marks. He sure did look tough ! He
was wearin' a gray suit with a belt around the middle an'
canvas leggins.

Along about nine o'clock he nodded over into the fire, right
at the most excitin' part of an Injun tale which Tank was
niakin' up for his especial benefit. We fished him out an'
shook him awake ; but he came to as cross as a hornet, an'
swore he was goin' to sleep right where he was with all his
clothes on.

" You 're a wise pigeon to sleep with your clothes on,
to-night," sez Tank ; " 'cause this is the Injun country,
an' ya can't tell what '11 happen ; but the best plan for us to
do is to divide up an' keep watch durin' the night."

" Keep watch ! " yells Horace, glarin' at Tank. " I
wouldn't keep watch to-night if I was bound to a torture
stake. You can keep watch if you want to — an' it would n't
discommode you no more 'n if you was an owl. Your dog-
gone, doubly condemned nerves won't let you nor any one
else sleep — but I 'm goin' to get some rest ii I die for it."

" You 're a nice one, you are ! " sez Tank. " This here
expedition was got up just on account o' your nerves, an'

96 FRIAR TUCK

now that we've come to the most important point of all,
why, you flam out an' put all the risk on us."

" You make me tired," sez Horace, scowlin' at Tank as
fierce as a cornered mouse. "If you 're so everlastin' feared
o' the Injuns — what ya got this bloomin' fire for? "

" We don't intend to sleep near the fire, Mr. Bradford,"
sez I, soothin'. " We intend to roll up our beds like as if we
was in 'em an' then sneak off into the bushes an* sleep.
We don't want any trouble if we can avoid it. If you '11
notice, you '11 see we have n't turned the hosses out to-night."

" These here Injuns is livin' on a reservation," sez he.
" an' I don't believe 'at they 'd dare outrage us."

I was indignant with the little cuss for not bein' afeared
of Injuns. My theory was, 'at nerves was a lot like hosses:
keep a boss shut up an' he '11 get bad an' kick an' raise Cain ;
but take him out an' ride his hide loose, an' he'll simmer
down consid'able. I wanted to give Horace's nerves such a
complete stringin' out that they wouldn't worry him any
more for a year; an' here he was, not carin' a hang for
Injuns. " Beliefs is all right to the believers," sez I, stiff-
enJn' up ; " but facts is facts whether you believe in 'em or
not. Every Injun outrage since the Civil War was planned
on a reservation, an' we can't take no chances."

While he was studyin' over this with a pouty look on his
face. Tank sez : " It 's time we fixed up an' moved out into
the dark " ; so we put rolls o' brush in the beds, an' went
on up the side o' the rise where the' was a level spot I knew
of, Horace stumblin' an' grumblin' every step o' the way.
We were about two hundred yards from the fire an' it looked
cozy an' cheerful, dancin' away beside the tarps. I was
half a mind to join in with Horace, an' go on back ; but our
plans were all laid, an' besides, I had a little bet up with

INJUNSI 97

Spider Kelley, that I 'd return Horace in such fine condition
that he '■ be willin' to drink blood or milk a cow calf-fashion.

"You go to sleep first," sez Tank to Horace; "I'll
watch till I get sleepy an' then I '11 call Happy, he '11 watch
two hours, an' if it ain't dawn by that time, he '11 call you.
I may not get sleepy at all, but you know how nerves is.
I stayed awake ninety-six hours once, an' couldn't get a
speck sleepy. Then I decided to stay out the even hundred
an' see how far I could jump after stay in' awake a hundred
hours. I went to sleep in ten minutes an' didn't wake up
for two days — so I 'm liable to be took sleepy to-night."

We had brought the slickers up, an* Horace rolled up in
one, under a low evergreen, and began to snore in half a
minute. As soon as he had got to wrastlin' with his breath
in earnest, I went to the head o' the trail an' whistled for
Spider Kelley. He an' four others were there, an' I told 'em
it was all right to start in an hour, an' then I came back
to Horace chucklin'. Spider enjoyed anything like this,
an' he had fixed up the boys with feathers an' fringe an'
smears o' chalk an' raspberry jam, till they looked as evil-
minded as airy Injuns I 'd ever seen.

We set Horace's watch ahead five hours. Tank curled
up an' went to sleep, an' then I started to wake Horace up.
..t took so long to get him to consciousness that I feared
the hour would be up ; but he finally got so he remembered
what he was, an' then I told him not to make any fuss if he
saw any Injuns, but to just wake us up. I tried to get
him to take one o' my guns, but I did n't wear triggers on
'em an' he did n't savvy snap-shootin', so he took a club in
his hand an' started to parade.

He looked at his watch while I was stretchin' out in his
warm spot, an' he looked at it again before I was through

111

■!

: I!

98 FRIAR TUCK

loosenin' up my muscles. It beats the world how slow time
crawls to a man on watch. I was sleepy myself, but I 'd
have bit out my tongue before I 'd have give in. I lay half
on my right side with my hat drawn down, watchin' Horace.
After about ten minutes, he pulled out his watch again an'
looked at it. He pulled out the snap to set it ahead, in order
to fool us, but he was troubled with too much morality, so
he snapped it shut an' spoke to himself between his set
teeth for several moments.

I reckon he must have kept on his feet for twenty minutes,
an' then he settled down with his face to the fire, which I
had fed up on my way back from seein' Spidt an' said
loud enough for me to hear : " This is all damn foolishness."

He said it so slow an' solemn an' earnest, that I purt nigh
choked; but I kept still, he kept still, an' the fire kept
dancin' before him. His breathin' grew deep an' steady,
his nerves was all coiled up comfortable ; and tired muscles
don't make a feller wakeful. Purty soon Horace began
to gargle his palate, an' then I was ready for Spider Kelley.

The plan was for him to come up close so as to entertain
Horace while his braves sneaked on to the dummies in the
tarps; but the' was no occasion for sneakin'. Horace had
turned over the camp to fate, an' he wasn't worryin' his
head about what was goin' to happen to it.

Finally, Spider got disgusted an' he went down an' joined
the others, an' they sure raised a riot; but all the time,
Horace slumbered on. Spider caught up our bosses, put
our saddles an' packs on 'em, threw some pieces of old
canvas he brought along on the fire; and he an' the rest
raised a wild warwhoop and galloped away; but Horace
was too busy to pay any attention. Spider an' the boys had
to work next day, an' they was some put out not to have a

INJUNS! 99

little more fun for their trouble. It was all Spider could
do to keep 'em from sneakin' back an' kidnappin' Horace,
but this was liable to give the whole thing away, so he
talked 'em out of it. As soon as the noise had died down,
I set Horace's watch back five hours, an' then I went to
sleep myself. It was purty chilly, and I wasn't quite sure
who the joke was on.

When Tank woke up, he started in on Horace; but his
noise wakened me up first. When Horace saw what had
happened to the camp, he was about wordless; but after
we had called him down about it for five or ten minutes, he
flared up an' talked back as harsh as we did. He said 'at
he had kept guard for over three hours, fightin' off sleep by
walkin' back an' forth ; and had n't sat down until it had
started to lighten in the sky. He stuck to this tale, and I 'm
sure he believed it himself. He 'd been so sleepy the night
before that he could n't ive told a dream from an actual
happenin', so when he began to get excited, we dropped it,

" All right," sez Tank at last ; " you 've put us into a
nice fix, but the' ain't no use tryin' to pickle yesterday.
What we 've got to do is to hoof it back, an' we might as
well begin. We 're in a nice fix : nothin' to eat, not a single
cabin on the road back, an' for all we know the's a pack
of Injuns watchin' us this blessid moment."

" How do ya know it was Injuns? " sez Horace.

" Look there, an' there, an' there," sez Tank, pointin' at
moccasin prints an' feathers. " Then besides, no white men
would 'a' burned up the tarps."

" Do you tpean to say 'at we got to walk all the way
back ? " sez Horace.

" All the way, an' without no grub," sez Tank.

Horace sat down on the end of a charred log. " Well,

100 FRIAR TUCK

I '11 die right here," sez he. " This spot suits me as well as
any other."

" You don't have to die at all," sez I. " A body can go
forty days without food, an' it does more good than harm."
Friar Tuck had told me a lot about fastin', an' I was keen
to try it out on Horace. From all I could see from the
theory o' fastin', it was just what was needed for Horace's
nerves.

"Look at me," sez Horace, puUin' at the waist of his
clothes. " I bet I 've lost twenty pounds already, on this
fool trip. Twenty pounds more would make me a corpse,
an' I 'd just as soon be made one here as anywhere. As
soon as I rest up a little, I 'm goin' to begin to yell until I
draw those blame Injuns back, an have 'em finish the job
in short order."

He wasn't bluffin', he was simply desp'rit. "You'U
have to walk with us," sez I ; " come on."

Tank took one arm, an' I took the other, an' we started
forth. For the 5rst hour he hung back, and then he began
to step out on his own hook. When we rested at noon, he
was the freshest one of uj. Tank an' I had ridin' boots, an'
ridin' muscles ; while he had walkin' shoes, an' no muscles
at all worth mentionin'. " I can play at this game as well
as any one," sez Horace, chewin' a blade o' grass, an' lookin'
proud of himself.

Tank was purty well fussed up: he wasn't workin' out
any theories, he had just come along to help pester Horace
an' have a little amusement ; but it began to appear to him
that his fun was comin' high-priced.

By nightfall we was all tol'able hungry ; but Horace was
so set up over bein' able to put over a full day's walk on
nothin' to eat that he was purty speechy, an' it was nine

INJUNS! 101

o'clock before he went to sleep. As soon as he had dropped
off, I went down to meet Spider Kelley an' get the grub he
had brought out for me 'n' Tank. He said 'at the other boys
wasn't braggin' none about their trip the night before; but
they were all ready to roast me an* Tank as soon as we got
in. We 'd had it fixed that Spider an' the rest was to take
turns worryin' Horace on the back trip; but Spider said
that it looked to him as if I 'd win the bet anyway, so he
intended to play neutral from that on. As soon as me an'
Tank had eaten, we turned in, an' all of us slept like logs.

>ii

CHAPTER ELEVEN

BENEFITS OF FASTING

The next day Horace walked easier 'n any of us. Now I 'm
tellin' this to ya straight 'n' you can believe it or not just
as ya please; but that little cuss stepped right along, began
to notice the scenery, an' even cracked a few jokes now an'
again; while me an' Tank just plod-' d with our minds
fixed on the meal we were goin' to get that night. Horace
had give up all thought o' meals, so they didn't pester him

At the end of the third day Horace had lost his appetite
complete. Friar Tuck had swore that hunger didn't worry
a man more 'n three days, an' sure enough, it did n't. ^ Horace
did n't care whether he ever et again or not. He 'd get a
little dizzy when he'd start out. an' once in a while he'd
feel a bit fainty; but as far as bein' ravenous went, me an
Tank had him beat a mile.

" Where is the joke o' this fool trip?" growled Tank to
me on the evenin' of the fourth day as we were eatin' the
supper Spider Kelley had brought out. " He ain't a human
at all. Horace ain't; he's a rep-tile, an' can live without

food." .. .

Spider was tickled a lot, and said he didnt care if he
did lose his bet, that it was worth it to find how everlastin'
tough a little half-hand like Horace could be when drove
to it. I'd been thinkin' it over all day, but I didn't say
anything.

BENEFITS OF FASTING 103

Friar Tuck had said it was a question of will power,
more 'n anything else: that if a man just held his thoughts
away from food it wouldn't bother him; but if he kept
thinkin' of it, the digestin' juices would flow into his
stomach an' make him think he was starvin'; so I was
minded to try a new plan next day.

" Spider," I sez, " you put a cow an' calf up in Nufty's
Corral " — which was the name of a little shut-in park we
would go through the next afternoon. " Put 'em there in
the momin', a cow with an off brand, if you can find one,
an' trim their hoofs down close, so they won't go back to
the bunch. Remember 'at we 're on foot, an' trim 'em close
enough to make it hurt 'em to walk. I 'm goin' to make
Horace hungry if I can."

" I hate to play again' him and my own bet," sez Spider ;
" but I '11 have the cow there, just to see what you 're up to.
If you're goin' to butcher it, though, I don't see why a
young steer would n't be better."

" I '11 count on you havin' it there," sez I ; an' then Spider
rode back to the ranch house, an' me an' Tank went to

sleep.

Next momin' me an' Tank put the catridges out of our
belts into our pockets. As soon as we started to walk 1
began to talk about my hunger, an' weakness, an' the empty
feelin' in my head an' stomach. At first Horace did n't pay
any heed; but from the start, ol' Tank Williams caught
every symptom I suggested; until I feared he 'd curl up on
the trail an' die o' starvation. Finally, though, Horace
began to pay heed to my suggestions, an' to sigh an' moan
a little. What finally got him was my gnawin' at my rope
an' gauntlet. Tank an' I had saved our ropes, 'cause we
expected to have need of 'em; and when noon came an'

104

FRIAR TUCK

fi I

I I

I sat with a stupid look in my face, chewin' first the rope,
an' then the wrist o' the gauntlet, Horace began to have
some of the symptoms I was fishin' for. Finally he bor-
rowed one o' my gauntlets, an' after he had munched on it
a while, he was as hungry as any one could wish.

" I can't go another peg," he sez when I got up to start
on again.

"How does that come?" I asked him. "When we
stopped to rest you was feelin' more chipper 'n any of us."

"I'm dyin' o' hunger," he replied, solemn. "I've got
a gnawin' pain in my stomach, an' I 'm all in. I fear my
stomach is punctured or stuck together or somethin'."

I had had a lot o' discussions with Friar Tuck about the
power o' suggestion ; but I had never took much stock in
it. I could see now, though, that it actually did work. As
long as Horace was tellin' himself that everything was all
right, why, it was all right. Then when I suggested 'at we
were dyin' of hunger, why, he actually began to die of
hunger; an' it was wonderful to see the change in him.
He showed us how he had ganted down ; and the fact was,
his bones had become purty prominent without any help
from suggestin'. He did n't have any more belly 'n a snake ;
but his eyes were bright, an' his skin clear, except that it
was peelin' oflf purty splotchy, from sun-burn.

We finally left him an' started on ; and after we 'd got
some distance, he staggered after us; but he was just goin'
on his nerve now, an' not gettin' much joy out of existence.
About four in the afternoon, we reached Nufty's Corral,
a fine little park with only a na row entrance at each end.
Horace was up with u? by this time, an' we were all ploddin'
along head down. Suddenly Horace grabbed us by the
arms. " Hush ! " he sez.

BENEFITS OF FASTING 105

" What 's up? " sez I, lookin' at him.

" Look," he whispers, pointin' at the cow an' calf ;
" there 's food."

We drew back an' consulted about it. " The great danger
after a fast," I sez in wamin', " lies in overeatin'. All we
can do is to drink a little blood for the first few hours."

" Why can't we broil a steak over some coals ? " sez
Horace.

" It would kill us to eat steak now," sez I.

He held out for the steak; but I finally sez that if he
won't promise to be temperate an' eat only what I tell him,
I 'U drive off the cov. ; and then he comes around, and agrees
to it.

" You sneak around to the far openin', Tank," I sez, then
I pauses, an' looks i»t him as though shocked. " Where 's
your catridges, man ? " I asked.

Tank felt of his belt, and seemed plumb beat out, then
he looked at mine, an' yelled, " Where 's yours ? "

We both sat down on stones an' went over what we had
done every minute o' the time since we had started out;
until Horace became frantic, an' sez : " What 's the difference
what became of 'em ? Your revolvers are loaded. You can
sure kill one cow out o' twenty-four shots."

" Twenty shots," I corrected. " We alius carry the ham-
mer on an empty chamber ; an' I 'm so bloomin' weak I
doubt if I could hit a cow in ten shots."

Horace turned loose an' told us what he thought of us,
an' it was edif>in' to hearken to him — he hit the nail on
the head so often. Finally I sez : " Well, a man can do no
more than try — Go ahead, Tank, but don't let her get
by you, whatever happens."

The cow, which was a homely grade-whiteface with

io6

FRIAR TUCK

a splotch on her nose which made it look as if most of the
nose had been cut off, stood in the center of the park, an'
she was beginnin' to get uneasy, although the wind was

from her way. ...!.•

As soon as Tank got to his entrance he shot m the air;
an' she came chargin' down on me. I shot over her, an
she charged back. We kept this up until Horace lost pa-
tience an' called me a confounded dub. "Here," itz I,
" the's two catridges left. You fire 'em, I won't."

At first he refused, but he was desperate, and finally after
I 'd told him to use both hands, he took a shot. The cow
was standin' closest to us, but lookin' Tank's way, an'
Horace nicked her in the ham. Instead of chargin' Tank,
like a sensible cow, she came for us head on. Now. when
a bull charges, he picks out somethin' to steer for, then
closes his eyes, and sets sail; but a cow keeps her eyes
open, an' she don't aim to waste any plunges either. Horace
stood out in the center of the entrance an' banged away
again, strikin' the ground about ten feet in front of him.
" Run! " I yells to him, jumpin' back behind a big rock,

" Run ! "

He forgot all about bein' hungry, an' he started to back-
trail like a scared jack-rabbit. The cow had forgot all about
havin' had her hoofs pared, an' she took after him like a
hungry coyote. As she passed me, I roped her, took a
snub around the rock, an' flopped her; but she did just what
I thought she'd do -rolled to her feet an' took after me^
She was angry. I 'd have given right smart for a tough
little pony between my knees.

The rock was too big to get a half hitch over, so I just
ran at right angles from her, hopin' to stretch out more
rope'n she could cover. I did it by a few feet; but she

The cow had forgot all about havin' had her hoofs pared, an' she
took after him like a hungry coyote

See fas* tot

I i:

BENEFITS OF FASTING

107

swung around into my rope head on, an' this flung me up
again' her side. I managed to hang on to the rope, how-
ever, an' this fixed her, 'cause she 'd have had to pull that
rock over before she could 'a' come any farther. Horace
had stopped an' was gappin' at us from a safe distance ; but
Tank arrived by this time an' put another rope on her an' wc
had her cross-tied between two big rocks by the time Horace
arrived.

" What ya goin' to kill her with ? " he asked, his eyes
dancin' like an Injun s at the beef whack-up.

" My catridges are all gone," scz Tank.

" Mine too," sez I.

"Can't you use a knife, or a stone?" sez Horace, the
dude.

" You can try it if you want to," sez I ; " but hanged if
I will."

He took a big stone an' walkec*. to the head of the cow,
but his nerve gave out, an' he threw down the stone. " What
in thunder did you tie her up for, then ? " sez he.

" I beg your pardon," sez I, " but I thought perhaps she
might be a little vexed with you on account o' your shootin'
her up. She was headed your way."

He sat down on a stone an' looked at the cow resentful.
Suddenly his face lit up. " Why don't you milk her?" sez
he. " We can live on milk for weeks."

It *s funny how much alike hungry animals look. As
Horace sat on the stone with his anxious face, his poppin'
eyes, his mussed up side-burns, an' the water drippin' from
his mouth at thought o' the milk, he looked so much like
a setter pup I once knew that it was all I could do to hold
a straight face.

" Do you know how to milk, ' vk? " I sez.

io8

FRIAR TUCK

" I don't," sez Tank ; " nor I don't know what it tastes
like."

" Go ahead an' milk her, Mr. Bradford," I sez, " You 're
the only one what knows how to milk, or who cares to
drink it. What you goin' to milk it in ? "

" I never milked in my lif'/' sez he; " but I saw it done
once when I was a boy, ai 1 'm goin' to try to milk in my
hat."

He had a bad time of it ; but he only got kicked twice,
an' both times it was short, glancin' blows, not much more 'n
shoves. Finally, he came over to where me an' Tank was
settin' an' flopped himself down beside us. " Can't you
strangle her with those ropes ? " he sez, in what might well
be called deadly earnest.

We shook our heads, an' continued to sit there lookin' at
the cow as though we expected she 'd point the way out of
our trouble. Presently the calf remembered his own appe-
tite, an' rushed up an' gave a demonstration of what neat
an' orderly milkin' was. Horace sighed. " Gee, I bet that 's
good," he said, the water drippin' from his lips again. He
had been four days without food, walkin' all that time
through the mountains, sleepin' out doors with no cover but
a slicker ; and he had about burned up all his waist products,
which Friar Tuck said was a city man's greatest handicap.
His eyes got a little red as he watched the calf, an' I saw
that he meant to slaughter it ; so I sez to him : " That 's
the way to milk, Mr. Bradford. Why don't you sneak
up on the other side an' try it that way, the same time the
calf is?"

He studied a moment, an' then shook his head. " No, she
could tell me from the calf," he said sorrowful. " Our fore-
heads are shaped ' .Terent, an' I 'd have to get down on my

BENEFITS OF FASTING 109

hands and knees. She'd tell me in a minute, an' I don't
want to be on my hands an' knees when she kicks me."

" We could throw an' hog-tie her," sez Tank ; " and you
could get it easy an' comfortable. Would you want us to
do >hat, Mr. Bradford?"

Norace jumped to his feet an' shook his fist in Tank's
fate. " Don't call me Mister again," he yelled. " I 'm
plumb sick of it. If I ever live to get another bath an'
back East where the's food in plenty, why, I '11 take up
the Mister again ; but now that I 've got to a point where
I have to suck milk from a hog-tied cow, you call me Horace,
or even Dinky — which was my nickname at school. Yes,
for heaven's sake, tie the cow. I have to have milk, an'
that 's the only way I see to get it."

Well, Tank an' I was so full o' laugh we could hardly truss
up the cow; but we finally got her on her back so 'at she
could n't do nothin' but snap her tail, an' then Horace threw
his hat on the ground, an' started in. I was entirely joyful :
I knew 'at Spider Kelley, an' as many o' the boys as could
sneak away, were watchin' us from up on the hill, an' this
was the grand triumph of my treatment for nerves.

Horace approached the cow with consid'able caution, as
she was in an awkward position. The calf had been inter-
rupted in his meal, before he had squenched his thirst, an'
he was still prospectin' about on his own hook.

" Here," said Horace, givin' him a push, " this is my
turn."

You know how a calf is: a calf ain't afeared o' nothin'
except hunger. Here was his food-supply bein' robbed,
right when he was needin' it. He blatted down in his throat,
an' tried to nose Horace out of the way. Horace was findin'
that milk the best stuff he had ever tasted, an' he fought oflF

no FR aR tuck

the calf with his right hand, while he steadied himself by
puttin' his left on the hind leg o' the calf's mother, an' got
a nice coat o' creamy froth in his side-burns. He was so
blame htmgry he did n't see a speck o' humor in it ; but me
an' Tank nearly died.

" Say," sez Horace, raisin' his head, the milk drippin'
from his lips, " can't one o' you fellers fend off this calf till
I finish."

Tank held the calf while I advised Hoi ace to be temper-
ate, an' after a bit he gave a sigh an' said, that that was all
he could hold just then, but not to let the cow escape. We
loosened her, left one o' the ropes on for a drag picket, an'
took off the other. She was purty well subdued; but we
refused to give Horace any more milk that night, an' he
went to sleep before we had a fire bjilt. Spider Kelley was
wabblin' with laughter when he brought us our supper. He
had been the only one who could stay after bringin' up the
cow ; but he said he would n't 'a' missed it for three jobs.

CHAPTER TWELVE

A COMPLETE CURE

Next momin' we fed Horace all the milk ]r"i could hold, an'
tried to drive the cow along with us ; but her hoofs had been
pared so thin that it made her cross an' we had to give that
projec' up.

" How far are we from the ranch house?" asked Horace.

" About sixty miles," sez Tank.

" That 's what I thought," sez he. " Now, I can't see any
sense in all of us hoofin' that distance. I 'd go if I knew
the way ; but one of you could 3^0, an' the other stay with me
an' the cow. Then the one which went could bring back food
on the buckboard, and it wc ' be as good as if we all
went."

Now this was a fine scheme ; but neither Tank nor I had
thought of it. We had intc ued to follow our own windin'
circle back every step o' the way; but when the milk set
Horace's brain to pumpin', he fetched up this idee which
saved us all a lot o' bother.

" I shall go myself," sez Tank ; " weak as I am, I '11 go
myself."

It was only about fifteen or twenty miles by the short cut,
an' this would get him back to regular meals in short order ;
so he left me his rope an' set out. Horace helped me with
the cow that night, an' he proved purty able help. He was
feelin' fine, an' the milk had filled him out wonderful. He
said he had n't felt so rough 'n' ready for twenty

ty years ;

' i I

(

'. - i<

112 FRIAR TUCK

Spider Kelley failed to arrive with my meal that night, and
I went to bed feelin' purty well disgusted. Tank had met
him before noon that day, an' he had gone in for a hoss ;
and they had decided that it would be a good stunt to give
me some o' my own treatment.

Next momin' I felt as empty as a balloon ; so after Horace
had enjoyed himself, I took a little o' the same, myself ; but
I didn't take it like he did. I held my mouth open an'
squirted it in, an' it was mighty refreshin'.

" Huh," sez Horace, " you 're mightily stuck up. The
calf's way is good enough for me."

" I got a split lip," I sez, half ashamed o' myself.

They left us there three days to allow for the time it
would have taken Tank to walk if it had been as far as
we claimed it was; and then Tillte Dutch drove out the
buckboard. He said 'at Spider an' Tank had quit and gone
into Boggs for a little recreation; but after I had eaten
my first meal out o' the grub he brought, I did u c bear
'em any ill will. The joke was on me as much as it was
on Horace ; but I 'd 'a' gone through twice as much
to test that theory, an' I 'd had the full worth o' my bother.
Horace was a new man: he was full o' vim an' snap, an'
he gave me credit for it an' became mighty friendly an'
confidential.

He stood up in the buckboard an' made a farewell speech
to the cow which lasted ten minutes. He also apologized
to the calf, an' told him that when he got back East, he
would raise his hat every time he passed a milk wagon.
He sure felt in high spirits, and made up a ramblin' sort of
a song which lasted all the way back to the house. It had
the handiest tune ever invented and he got a lot o' fun out
of it. It began:

A COMPLETE CURE

113

' Oh we walked a thousand miles without eatin' any food,
An' then we met a cow an' calf, an' gee, but they looked good!
Her eyes like ancient Juno's were so in-o-cent an' mild.
We could n't bear to take her life, we only robbed her child.
She rtrove to save the lactual juice to feed her darling boy;
So wc had to fling her on her back to fill our souls with joy.
Now Tank an' Happy were too proud to compete with a calf,
So they sat them down an' dined on wind, while they weakly tried to

laugh.
I 'm but a simple-minded cuss, not proud like one of these;
So I filled myself so full of milk, I 'm now a cottage cheese."

;

Horace was as proud o' this song as though it was the
first one ever sung. He used the same tune on it that blind
men on corners use. I reckon that tune fits most any sort
of a song ; it 's more like the " Wearin' of the Green " than
anything else but ten times sadder an' more monotonous.
He said he had once wrote a Greek song at college but it
wasn't a patch on this one, and hadn't got him nothin'
but a medal. I used to know twelve or eighteen verses, but
I 've forgot most of it. It was a hard one to remember
because the verses was n't of the same length. Sometimes
a feller would have to stretch a word all out of shape to
make it cover the wave o' the tune, an' sometimes you 'd
have to huddle the words all up into a bunch. Horace said
that all high class music was this way ; but it made it lots
mere bother to learn than hymns.

The verse which pleased me the most was the forty-third.
Horace himself said 'at this was about as good as any,
though he liked the seventy-ninth one a shade better, himself.
The forty-third one ran :

" A cow-boy does not live on milk, that 's all a boy-cow 'U drink;
But the cow-ma loves the last the most, which seems a funny think.
I do not care for milk in pans with yellow scum o'er-smeared.
I like to gather mine myself; and strain it through my beard."

114

FRIAR TUCK

i 1

I never felt better over anything in my life than I did
over retumin' Horace in this condition. It was some risk
to experiment with such a treatment as mine on a feller who
regarded himself as an invalid; but here he was, comin'
back solid an' hearty, with his shape shrunk down to normal,
an' full o' jokes an' song.

Tillte Dutch had been one o' the braves in Spider's Injun
party ; so when we got in, about ten in the evenin', he lured
the rest o' the pack out to the corral, an' we agreed not to
make the details of our trip public. The ol' man would n't
have made a whole lot o' fuss seein' as it had turned out all
right ; but still, he was dead set on what he called courtesy
to guests; and he might 'a' thought that we had played
Horace a leetle mite strong. Barbie noticed the change in
Horace and, o* course, she pumped most o' the story out
o' me.

Horace himself was as game a little rooster as I ever saw.
He follered me around like a dog after that, helpin' with my
chores, an' ridin' every chance he had. He got confidential,
an' told me a lot about himself. He said that he had n't never
had any boyhood, that his mother was a rich widow, an'
was ambitious to make a scholar out of him; that she had
sent him to all kinds o' schools an' colleges an' universities,
and had had private tutors for him, and had jammed his
head so full o' leamin' that the' was n't room for his brain
to beat; so it had just lain smotherin' amidst a reek of all
kinds o' musty old facts. He said that he never had had
time for exercise, and had never needed money ; so he had
just settled into a groove lined with books an* not leadin'
anywhere at all. He said that since his mother's death he
had been livin' like a regular reecluse, thinkin' dead thoughts
in dead languages, an' not takin' mud: interest in anything

A COMPLETE CURE

115

which had happened since the fall o' Rome; but now that
he had learned for the first time what a world of enjoyment
the' was in just feelin' real life poundin' through his veins,
he intended to plunge about in a way to increase the quality,
quantity, and circulation of his blood.

Ya could n't help likin' a feller who took things the way
he did — we all liked him. He told us to treat him just as
if he was a fourteen-year-old boy, which we did, an' the'
wasn't nothin' in the way of a joke that he was n't up
against before the summer was over; but he came back at
us now an' again, good an' plenty.

Tank an' Spider tossin' up their jobs had left me with
more work on my hands 'n I generally liked, so I had to
stick purty close to the line until they went broke an' took
on again. Then one day me an' Horace took a ride up into
the hills. We had some lunch along and about noon we sat
down in a grassy spot to eat it. We had just finished and
had lighted our pipes for a little smoke when we heard Friar
Tuck comin' up the trail. I had n't seen him for months, an'
I was mighty glad to hear him again. He was fair shoutin',
so I knew 'at things was right side up with him. He was
singin' the one which begins : " Oh, come, all ye faithful,
joyful ar' triumphant," and he shook the echoes loose
with it.

Horace turned to me with a surprised look on his face;
"Who's that?" hesez.

" That 's Friar Tuck," sez I, " an' if you 've got any
troubles tell 'em to him."

" Well, would n't that beat ya ! " exclaimed Horace, an'
just then the Friar came onto our level with his hat off an'
his head thrown back. He was leadin' a spare hoss, an'
seemed at peace with all the world.

ii6 FRIAR TUCK

When he spied me, he headed in our direction, an' as soon
as he had finished the chorus, he called : " Hello, Happy !
What are you hidin' from up here? "

I jumped to my feet, an' Horace | ot to his feet, too, an'
bowed an' said : " How do ya do, Mr. Carmichael ? "

A quick change came over the Friar's face. It got cold
an' haughty ; and I was flabbergasted, because I had never
seen it get that way before. " How do you do," he said, as
cheery an' chummy as a hail-storm.

But he did n't need to go to the trouble o' freezin' himself
solid; Horace was just as thin skinned as he was when it
was necessary, an' he slipped on a snuffer over his welcomin'
smile full as gloomy as was the Friar's. I was disgusted:
nothin' pesters me worse 'n to think a lot o' two people who
can't bear each other. It leaves it so blame uncertain which
one of us has poor taste.

Well, we had one o' those delightful conflabs about
the weather an' " how hot it was daytimes, but so cool
an' refreshin' nights," an', " I must be goin' now," an' " oh,
what 's the use o' goin' so soon " — and so on. Then
Horace an' the Friar bowed an' the Friar rode away as
silent an' dignified as a dog which has been sent back
home.

" Well," sez Horace, after we 'd seated ourselves again, " I
never expected to see that man out here. I would n't 'a' been
more surprised to have seen a blue fish with yaller goggles
on, come swimmin' up the pass."

"Oh, wouldn't ya?" sez I. "Well, that man ain't no
more like a blue fish with goggles on than you are. He 's
ace high anywhere you put him, an' don't you forget
that."

" You need n't arch up your back about it," he sez. " I

A COMPLETE CURE

117

have n't said anything again' him. I gave up goin' to church
on his account."

" That 's nothin' to brag about," sez I. " A man '11 give
up goin' to church simply because they hold it on Sunday,
which is the one day o' the week when he feels most like
stackin' up his feet on top o' somcthin' an' smokin' a pipe.
A man who could n't plan out an excuse for not goin' to
church would n't be enough intelligent to know when he
was hungry,"

" You must 'a' set up late last night to whet your sar-
casm ! " sez Horace, swellin' up a little. " Why don't you
run along and hold up a screen, so 'at folks can't look at
your parson."

" How 'd you happen to quit church on his account ? "
sez I.

" He was only a curate, when I first knew him," sez
Horace.

" He 's a curate yet," sez I. " I tried one of his cures
myself, lately; an' it worked like a charm." I turned my
head away so 'at Horace wouldn't guess 'at he was the
cuss I had tried it on.

"A curate hasn't nothin' to do with doctorin'," sez
Horace. " A curate is only the assistant of the regular
preacher which is called a rector. The curate does the hard
work an' the rector gets the big pay."

" That 's the way with all assistants," sez I ; "so don't
bother with any more details. Why did you quit goin' to
church?"

" I quit because he quit." sez Horace.

" What did he quit for," sez I ; " just to bust up the church
by drawin' your patronage away from it ? "

" He quit on account of a girl," sez Horace ; an' then I

I 8 FRIAR TUCK

stopped my foolishness, an' settled down to get the story
out of him. Here I 'd been wonderin' for years about
Friar Tuck; an' all those weeks I had been with Horace
I had never once thought o' tryin' to see what he might
know.

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

AN UNEXPECTED CACHE

Humans is the most disappointin' of all the animals : when
a mule opens his mouth, you know what sort of a noise is
about to happen, an' can brace yourself accordin'; an' the
same is true o' screech-owls, an' guinea-hens an' such ; but
no one can prepare for what is to come forth when a human
opens his mouth. You meet up with a professor what knows
all about the stars an' the waterlines in the hills an' the pet-
rified fishes, an' such ; but his method o' bein' friendly an'
agreeable is to sing comic songs like a squeaky saw, an'
dance jigs as graceful as a store box ; while the fellow what
can sing an' dance is forever tryin' to lecture about stuff
he is densely ignorant of.

The other animals is willin' to do what they can do, an'
they take pride in seein' how well they can do it; but not
so a human. He only takes pride in tryin' to do the things
he can't do. A hog don't try to fly, nor a butterfly don't try
to play the comet, nor a cow don't set an' fret because she
can't climb trees like a squirrel; but not so with man: he
has to try everything 'at anything else ever tried, an' he
don't care what it costs nor who gets killed in the attempt.
Sometimes you hear a wise guy say : " No, no that 's con-
trary to human nature." This is so simple minded it alius
makes me silent. Human nature is so blame contrary, itself,
that nothin' else could possibly be contrary to it. To think
of Horace knowin' about the Friar, an' yet doggin' me all
over the map with that song of his, was enough to make

120 FRIAR TUCK

me shake him ; but I did n't. I wanted the story, so I pumped
him for it, patient an' persistent.

" I never was very religious," began Horace. Most peoj .e
begin stories about other people, by tcllin' you a lot about
themselves, so I had my resignation braced for this. " I
alius liked the Greek religion better 'n airy other," he went
on. " It was a fine, free, joyous religion, founded on Art
an' music, an' symmetry — "

I was willin' to stand for his own biography ; but after
waitin' this long for a clue to the Friar's past, I was n't re-
signed to hearin' a. joint debate on the different religions;
so I interrupted, by askin' if him believin' in the Greek reli-
gion was what had made Friar Tucl. throw up his job.

" No, you chump," — me an' Horace was such good
friends by this time that we did n't have any regard for one
another's feelin's. " No, you chump," he sez, " I told you he
quit on account of a girl. I don't look like a girl, do I ? "

" Well," sez I, studying him sober, " those side-burns look
as if they might 'a' been bangs which had lost their holt in
front an' slipped down to your lip ; but aside from this you
don't resemble a girl enough to drive a man out o' church."

I alius had better luck with Horace after I 'd spurred him
up a bit.

" You see, Friar Tuck, as you call him, was a good deal
of a fanatic, those days," sez Horace, after he'd thrown
a stone at me. " He took his religion serious, an' wanted to
transform the world into what it would be if all people
tried their best to live actual Christ-like lives. He was a big
country boy, fresh from college, an' full of ideals, an' feelin'
strong enough to hammer things out accordin' to the pat-
tern he had chose.

" It was his voice which got him his place. He had a

,51

AN UNEXPECTED CACHE

131

perfectly marve.^us voice, an' I never heard any one else
read the service like he did. This was what took me to
church, and I 'd have gone as long as he stayed. You see,
Happy, life is really made up of sensations an' emotions;
and it used to lift me into the clouds to see his shinin' youth
robed in white, an' h*;ar that wonderful voice of his fillin*
the great, soft-lighted church with melody an' mystery. It
was all I asked of religion an' it filled me with peace an' in-
spiration. Of course, from a philosophical standpoint, the
Greek religion — "

"Did the girl believe in the Greek religion?" I asked to
switch him back.

" No, no," he snapped. " This Greek religion that I 'm
speakin' of died out two thousand years ago."

" Then let 's let it rest in peace," sez I, " an' go on with
your story."

" You understand that this was a fashionable church," sez
Horace. " They was willin' to pay any sum for music an'
fine readin' an' all that ; but they was n't minded to carry out
young Carmichael's plan in the matter of Christianizin' the
world. They was respectable, an' they insisted that all who
joined in with 'em must be respectable, too; while he dis-
covered that a lot o' the most persistent sinners was n't re-
spectable at all. His theory was, that religion was for the
vulgar sinners, full as muv^n as for the respectable ones ; so
he made a round-up an' wrangled in as choice a lot o' sin-
ners as a body ever saw ; but his bosses would n't stand for
his corralin' 'em up in that fashionable church.

" He stood out for the sinners , an' finally they compro-
mised by gettin' him a little chapel in the slums, an' lettin'
him go as far as he liked with the tough sinners down there
through the week ; but readin' the service on Sundays to the

123

FRIAR TUCK

respectable sinners in the big church. This plan worked
smooth as ice, until they felt the need of a soprano singer
who could scrape a little harder again' the ceilin' than the
one they already had. Then Carmichael told 'em that he
had discovered a girl with a phe-nominal voice, an' had been
teachin' her music for some time. He brought her up an'
gave her a trial — "

" An' she was the girl, huh ? " I interrupted.

" She had a wonderful voice, all right," sez Horace, not
heedin' me ; " but she was n't as well trained as that church
demanded; so they hired her for twenty-five dollars a
Sunday on the condition that she take lessons from a pro-
fessor who charged ten dollars an hour. She was game,
though, an' took the job, an' made good with it, too, improvin'
right along until it was discovered that she was singin' week-
nights in a cafe, from six to eight in the evenin', an' from
ten to twelve at night.

" The girl had been singin' with a screen o' flowers in front
of her; and some o' the fashionable male sinners from the
big church had been goin' there right along to hear her sing ;
but they could n't work any plan to get acquainted with her,
and this made her a mystery, and drew 'em in crowds.
Finally, as her voice got better with the trainin', critics ad-
mitted 'at she could make an agreeable noise ; and the com-
mon sinners was tickled to have their judgment backed up,
so they began to brag about it. The result o' this was, that
one ol' weasel had to swaller his extra-work-at-the-office
excuse, and take his own wife to hear the singer. Then the
jig was up. The woman recognized the voice first pop; and
within a week it was known that Carmichael had been goin'
home with her every night.

" Now, you may be so simple-minded that you don't know

AN UNEXPECTED CACHE

123

it ; but really, this was a perfectly scandalous state of affairs,
and the whole congregation began to buzz like a swarm of
angry bees. Carmichael was as handsome a young feller
as was ever seen; but he had never taken kindly to after-
noon teas and such-like functions, which is supposed to be
part of a curate's duties ; so now, when they found he had
been goin' home nights with a girl 'at sang in a cafe it like
to have started an epidemic of hysteria.

" They found that the girl lived in a poor part o' the town,
and supported her mother who was sickly, that they were
strangers to the city, and also not minded to furnish much
in the way o' past history. They insisted upon her givin' up
the caf6-singin' at once ; and from what I 've heard, they
turned up their noses when they said it.

" Carmichael pointed out that she was givin' up twenty a
week for lessons which they had insisted upon; and asked
'em if they were sure a girl could be any more respectable,
supportin' a sickly mother on five a week, than if she added
fifteen to it by singin' in a cafe. He got right uppish about
it and said right out that he could n't see where it was one
bit more hellish for her to sing at the cafe than for other
Christians to pay for a chance to listen to her.

" This tangled 'em up in their own ropes consid'able ; but
what finally settled it was, 'at their richest member up and
died, and they simply had to have a sky-scrapin' soprano
to start him off in good style; so they gave her twenty a
week and paid for her lessons. The cafe people soon found
what a card she 'd been and they offered her fifty a week ;
but she was game and stuck to the agreement."

" How did you find out all this, Horace ? " I asked.

"A friend o' mine belonged to the vestry," sez Horace;
" and he kept me posted to the minute. This was his first

124 FRIAR TUCK

term at it, and it was his last; but he was a lucky cuss to
get the chance just when he did. I have since won him
over to see the beauty o' the Greek religion."

" What became o' the girl ? " sez I with some impatience,
for I did n't care as much as a single cuss-word for the Greek
religion.

" Carmichael was a gentle spoken young feller," sez
Horace, " but for all that, he was n't a doormat by inherit-
ance nor choice, and he kept on payin' attention to the girl,
and got her to sing at his annex in the slums. Night after
night he filled the place with the best assortment o' last-
chance sinners 'at that locality could furnish; and he an'
the girl an' the sinners all pitched in and offered up song
music to make the stars rock ; but St. Holiemthou was n't
the sort of a parish to sit back and let a slum outfit put over
as swell a line b' melody as they were servin', themselves;
so they ordered Carmichael to cut her off his list. He tried
to get 'em to hire another curate, and let him have full swing
at the annex ; but they told him they 'd close it up first.

" Next, a delegation o' brave an' inspired women took it
upon 'emselves to call on the girl. They pointed out that she
was standin' in the way o' Carmichael's career, that, under
good conditions, his advance was certain; but that a false
step at the start would ruin it all. They went on and hinted
that if it was n't for her, he mighi have married an heiress,
and grow up to be one o' the leadin' ministers o' the whole
country."

" What did she do, Horace? " sez I.

" The girl was proud ; she thanked the delegation for takin'
so much interest in her — and said that she would not detain
'em any longer; but would think it over as careful as she
could. Then she walked out o' the room ; and the delega-

AN UNEXPECTED CACHE

125

tion strutted off with their faces shinin' like a cavey o' pros-
perous cats. The girl vanished, just simply vanished. She
wrote Carmichael a letter, and that was the end of it. Some
say she committed suicide, and some say she went to Europe
and became a preemie donner — a star singer — but anyway,
that was the end of her, as far as that region was concerned."

" She was a fine girl," sez I ; " though I wish that instead
of slippin' off that way, she had asked me to drown the mem-
bers o' that delegation as inconspicuous as possible. I
wouldn't put on moumin', if the whole outfit of 'em was
in the same fix your confounded Greek Religion is. What
was her name, Horace ? "

" Janet Morris," sez he.

I said it over a time or two to myself; and it seemed to
fit her. " I like that name," sez I. " Now tell me the way
'at the Friar cut loose and tied into that vestry. I bet he
made trade boom for hospitals and undertakers."

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

Happy's new ambition

Ol' Tank Williams alius maintained that I had a memory
like the Lord; but this ain't so. What I do remember, I
actually see in pictures, just like I told you; but what my
memory chooses to discard is as far out o' my reach as the
smoke o' last year's fire. I 've worked at my memory from
the day I was weaned, not bein' enough edicated t^ know
'at the proper way is to put your memory in a book — and
then not lose the book. I 've missed a lot through not gettin'
on friendly terms with books earlier in life ; but then I 've
had a lot o' fun with my memory to even things up.

This part about the Friar, though, isn't a fair test.
Horace's vestry-man friend was what is known as a short-
hand reporter. Short-hand writin' is merely a lot o' dabs
and slips wh^ch 'd strain a Chinaman ; but Horace said it was
as plain to read as print letters, and as fast to write as spoke
words. Hugo took it down right as it was given; and
Horace had a copy which I made him go over with me
until I had scratched it into the hardest part o' my memory ;
and now it is just the same as if I had seen it with my own
eyes — me knowin' every tone in the Friar's voice, and the
way his eyes shine ; yes, and the way his jaws snap off the
words when he 's puttin' his heart into a thing.

Horace sat thinkin', before he started on with his tale ; and
I sat watchin' his face. It was just all I could do to make
out the old lines which had give me tlic creeps a few weeks

HAPPY'S NEW AMBITION 127
before. Now, it had a fine, solid tan, the eyes were full o'
fire, and he looked as free from nerves as a line buckskin.
The Friar sez we 're all just bits o' glass through which the
spirit shines; and now that I had cleaned Horace up with
my nerve treatment, the' was a right smart of spirit shinin'
out through him, and I warmed my hands at it. He simply
could not learn to roll a cigarette with one hand; but in
most things, he was as able a little chap as ever I took the
kinks out of.

" I 'm sorry I did n't belong to that vestry," sez Horace,
after a bit. " When I look back at all the sportin' chances
I 've missed, I feel like kickin' myself up to the North Pole
and back. From now on I intend to mix into every bloomin'
jambaree 'at exposes itself to the vision of my gaze. I 'm
goin' to ride an' shoot an' wrestle an' box an' gamble an'
fight, and get every last sensation I 'm entitled to — but I '11
never have another chance at a vestry-meetin' like the one
I 'm about to tell you of.

"You saw how toppy Carmichael got this afternoon; so
you can guess purty close how he looked when he lined up
this vestry."

" Oh, I 've seen the Friar in action," sez I ; " and you can't
tell me anything . >ut his style. All you can tell is the de-
tails. So go to 'em without wastin' any more time."

" How comes it you call such a man as him Friar Tucl-' "
asked Horace, who alius was as hard to drive as an only son
burro.

" Well, I don't approve of it," sez I, " and I kicked about
it to the Friar; but he only laughed, and said 'at one name
was as good as another. A bettin' barber over at Boggs give
it to him for admonishin' a gambler from Cheyenne."

"Was he severe?" asked Horace.

138

FRIAR TUCK

" Depends on how you look at it," sez I. " He took a club
away from the gambler an' spanked him with it; but he
did n't injure him a mite."

'* Humph," sez Horace, " I guess the name won't rust
much while it's in his keepin'. He took other methods at
this vestry meetin', though I don't say they were any more
befittin'. Hugo — such was the name of my friend — said
it was the quietest, but the most dramatic thing he ever
saw.

" They started in by treatin' him like the boy he was, gave
him a lot o' copy-book advice, especially as to the value o'
patience, how that Paul was to do the plantin', Appolinaris,
the waterin'; but that the size an' time o' the harvest de-
pended Oil the Lord, Himself; and that it was vanity to
think 'at a young boy just out o' college could rush things
through the way he was tryin' to.

" The' was a hurt look about Carmichael's eyes ; but the
hurt had come from the letter, not from them, so he sat
quiet and smiled down at 'em in a sort of super-human calm-
ness. They thought he was bluffed speechless, so they girded
up their loins, an' tied into him a little harder, tellin' him
that his conduct in walkin' home nights with a cafe-singer
was little short of immoral, although they wouldn't make
no pointed charge again' the woman herself. Then they
wound up by sayin' 'at they feared he was too young to
spend so much time amid the environs o' sin, and that they
would put an older man in charge o' the annex, and this
would leave him free to attend strictly to cu-ratin'.

" When they had spoke their piece, they were all beamin'
with the upliftin' effect of it; and they settled back with
beautiful smiles o' satisfaction to listen to Carmichael's
thanks and repentance. He sat there smilin' too — not smilin'

HAPPY'S NEW AMBITION 129
the brand o' smiles 'at they were, but still smilin'. It
would strain a dictionary to tell all there is in some smiles.

" Presently he rose up, swept his eyes over 'em for a time,
and said in a low tone: ' Then I am to understand that I am
to follow in the Master's footsteps only as far as personal
chastity goes? ' said he. ' That I may respectably pity the
weak and sinful from a distance; but must not dismount
from my exalted pedestal to take 'em by the hand an' lift
'em up — Is that what you mean ? ' sez he.

" They still thought he was whipped, so one of 'em pulled
a little sarcasm on him : ' Takin' the weak an' sinful by the
hand an' liftin' 'em up is all right,' said he; 'but it's not
necessary to go home with 'em after midnight.'

"Carmichael bit his lips; he tried to hold himself down,
he honestly tried for some time; but he wasn't quite able.
His hands trembled an' his lip trembled while he was fightin'
himself; but when he kicked off his hobbles an' sailed into
'em, his tremblin' stopped an' the words shot forth, clear an'
hot an' bitish. Hugo sat back in a corner durin' this meetin',
without speakin' a single word ; and he was glad of it. It
saved him from gettin' his feelin's kicked into flinders about
him, an' interf erin' with the view ; and it gave him a chance
to take his notes.

" • As a matter o' faith,' said Carmichael, ' we believe that
Jesus never sinned ; but we cannot know this as a matter of
fact. Yet we can know, and we do know, as a matter of
history, that He mingled an' had fellowship with the fallen,
the sinful, the outcast, and the disreputable. With these He
lived, and with these and for these He left the power and
the life and the glory of His religion — and you say that I
must live in a glass case, may only look in holy dignity down
at the weak and sinful; but that I mustn't go home with

itij

130 FRIAR TUCK

'em after midnight. With God, a thousand years is but as
a day — and yet it would be wrong for me to be in a sinner's
company after midnight ! '

" Carmichael paused here to give 'em a comeback at him ;
but their mouths were dry, and they only hemmed an'
hawed. * Every Sunday, in the service of this refined an'
respectable church, hunderds of you admit that you have
no health because of your sins — and yet, because of my
youth, you say I must remain with you where sin is robed
in silk and broadcloth, and not risk my soul where sin is
robed in rags.'

" He paused again, and this time his eyes began to shoot
jerk-lightning, an' when he started to speak his deep voice
shook the room like the low notes of a big organ. ' No,' he
said, ' I am not content to walk with the Lord, only on the
day of His triumph — The very ones who strewed the path-
way of His majesty with palms, and filled the air with ho-
saners, deserted Him at the cross — but I must walk with
Him every step of the way. I do not pray that my earthly
garments be spotless, I do not pray that my sandals be un-
worn an' free from mud ; but I do pray that when I stand
on my own Calvery I may stand with those who bear crosses,
not with those who have spent their lives in learnin' to wear
crowns.'

" Carmichael had discarded that entire vestry by this time,
and he didn't care a blue-bottle fly what they thought of
him. He towered above them with his face shinin', and his
voice rolled down over 'em like a Norther sweepin' through
the hills. ' Many there were,' he went on, ' who cried to Him,
Lord, Lord ; but after the tomb was sealed, it was the Mag-
dalene whose faith never faltered, it was to her He first ap-
peared; and on the final resurrection morning, I hope the

HAPPY'S NEW AMBITION

131

I .

I I

lesser Magdalenes of all the ages, and from all the nasty
corners of the world into which man's greed has crowded
'em, will know that I am their brother, and, save for a lovin'
hand at the right moment, one of them to the last sordid
detail.'

" Carmichael stopped after this, and the room was so
quiet you could hear the consciences o' that vestry floppin'
up and down again' their pocketbooks. When he began again
his voice was soft, an' the bitterness had given way to sad-
ness. ' The old way was best, after all,' he said. ' When
you pay a priest a salary, you hire him and he becomes your
servant. The custom is, for masters to dictate to their ser-
vants ; it is an old, old custom, and hard to break. I think
I could suit you ; but I do not think I shall try. The roots
of my own life lead back to the gutter, and through these
roots shall I draw strength to lift others from the gutter.
I do not value my voice as a means to amuse those already
weary of amusement : I look upon it as a tool to help clean
up the world. You are already so clean that you fear I may
defile you by contagion. You do not need me ; and with all
your careful business methods, you have not money enough
to hire me.

What you need here, is a diplomat ; while I yearn to be
on the firin' line. I care little for the etiquette of religion,
I want to get down where the fightin' is fierce an' primitive
— so I hereby resign.

This girl whom you have driven out of my life, needs
no defence from me or any man. I have known her since
she was a little child ; poverty was her lot, and self-sacrifice
has become her second nature. We are forbidden to judge ;
so I judge neither her nor you ; but I will say that often I
have stood silent before the beauty of her character, and

13a FRIAR TUCK

often my face has burned at the tainted money you have
put on the plate. Part of this money comes from the rental
of dives. I have seen the dives themselves, I have seen
their fearful product ; and I cannot believe that profit wrung
from a helpless slave can find its way to God - even on the
contribution plate.

" ' I love the music an' the service an' the vestments o'
this church ; and I hope I need not give them up ; but my
heart is in rebellion, and from this time on I take the full re-
sponsibility of my acts. I shall not choose my path ; but will
go as the spirit moves me ; and if ever I find one single spot
which seems too dark for the Light of the world to enter,
then shall the soul in me shrivel and die, and I shall become
a beast, howling in the jungle.' "

Horace said that after the Friar had left the room, those
vestry fellers sat in a sort of daze for some time, and then
got up an' sneaked out one at a time, lookin' exceeding
thoughtful ; while Hugo had hustled around to his room to
read off his notes.

We sat there on the hill until dark, me tryin' to pump him
for more details, but he did n't have 'em. He said the Friar
had started to work in the slums ; but was soon lost sight of,
and the first he had heard of him for years was when he had
come up the pass, singin' his marchin' song. Course, I 'd
liked it some better if the Friar had knocked their heads to-
gether ; but still, takin' his eyes an' voice into consideration,
it must 'a' been a fine sight ; and if ever I get the chance, I 'm
goin' to take on as a vestry-man, myself, for at least one
term.

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

TENDER FEELINGS

Me an' Horace was regular chums after this. I had got to
likin' him after he had showed up good stuff under treat-
ment ; but I never took him serious until he got enthusiastic
about Friar Tuck. This proved him to have desirable quali-
ties and made him altogether worth while. A man never gets
too old to dote on flattery ; but the older he gets the more
particular he is about its quality. It 's just like tobacco an'
pie an' whiskey an' such things : we start out hungry for 'tm
an' take a lot o' trouble to get 'em in quantity ; but after a
time we 'd sooner go without altogether than not to have a
superior article; an' it 's just the same way with flattery.

I took Horace into my most thoughtful moods as soon as
I found out that he was as sound as a nut at heart, an' that
it was n't altc^ether his fault that he had been a pest to me
at first. The human mind is like new land, some of it 's rich
an' some poor. Facts is like manure, idees is like seed, an'
education is like spadin' up an' hoein' an' rakin'. Rich soil
is bound to raise somethin', even if it 's nothin' but weeds ;
but poor soil needs special care, or it won't even raise weeds.
Now, manure can be put on so thick it will turn ground
sour, an' seeds can be sowed so thick they will choke each
other, an* a green hand will sometimes hoe up the vege-
tables an' cultivate the weeds; but the soil ain't to blame
for this.

Poor Horace's mind had been bungled to an infernal de-

'34 FRIAR TUCK

gree; an' it kept me busy rootin' up sprouts o' Greek reli-
gion. I 'd have stood this better if the Greek godt an' god-
duses had had Christian names ; 'cause I own up 'at some o'
his tales of em was interestin' ; but I could n't keep track of
'em, an' so I made him discard em in his conversations with
me; an' the way he flattered me was, to reform himself ac-
cordin' to what I demanded.

I was teachin' him how to shoot, an' he was enjoyin' it a

lot. He had plenty o' money, and took pleasure in spendin'

it. This was good, 'cause it costs a lot o' money to become

a good shot. I 'm glad I don't know what it cost me to learn

how to shoot a man through both ears after doin' the double

reverse roll. I never had but one fit chance to use this, an'

then I shot Frenchy through his ears without rememberin*

to use the roll. I alius felt bad about this, 'cause I had a good

audience, an' nothin' saves a man from the necessity o'

shootin' his fellows, so much as havin' it well advertised that

he is thoroughly qualified to do it in proper style. I kept up

my own practicin' while teachin' Horace, an' we had right

sociable times.

He could throw up a tin can with his left hand, pull his
gun and, about once out o' ten shots, hit the can before it
fell; which is purty fair shootin'; but he was beginnin' to
suspect that he was a regular gun-man ; which is a dangerous
idee for any one to get into his head. I tried to weight down
his head a little to keep him sensible, but instead o' thankin'
me he went off with Tank, who shot up a lot of his catridges
at target practice; and in return, puffed up the top-heavy
opinion Horace already had of himse'f.

He took Horace down to a warm canon where the' was
a lot o' rattlesnakes, claimin' it was necessary to test him out
an' see if he had nerve on a livin' creature. He shot oflf the

TENDER FEELINGS

»35

heads o' three snakes, hand-runnin', an' it nearly broke his
hatband.

When he told me kc - it, I let him know 'at Tank was
only workin' him. "A rattlesnake will strike at a flash,
Horace," sez I ; " an* it was the snake's eyes which were ac-
curate, not yours." This cut him up an' made him a little
offish with me for a few days, until he found I had told him
the truth. 01' Tank Williams wasn't no fancy shot; but
I 'd rather have tackled Horace with a gun, cocked in his
hand, than ol' Tank, with his gun asleep in its holster.

After Horace had made the test of shootin' at dead snakes
an' had fotmd that he couldn't pop off three heads hand-
runnin', he simmered down a little an' paid more heed to what
I told him ; but after I had proved that I told him straightcr
stuff 'n Tank did, I decided it would be necessary to punish
him a little. I did n't get downright cold with him, because
I did n't want to exagerate his vanity any more 'n it already
was; but I made it a point to do my loafin' with Spider
Kelley. Horace was crazy to go bcar-huntin' ; but I did n't
seem interested, an' I recommended ol' Tank Williams as
bein' some the best bear-hunter the' was in existence. I
was n't jealous of Horace goin' off shootin' with Tank ; but
still if a feller chooses to dispense with my company, I alius
like to show him 'at I can stand it as long as he can.

Quite a string o' years had slipped away since the bettin'
barber o' Boggs had strung ol' man Dort; so I reminded
Spider 'at we had agreed to help even that up sometime ; and
Spider, he said he was ready to do his part, whatever it
happened to be ; so we planned idees out among ourselves,
while Horace hung around lookin' wishful.

We had never given it away about the woodchuck not
bcin' a regula quirrel ; so the boys still used to congregate

136

FRIAR TUCK

together purty often at ol' man Dort's to marvel at the way
Columbus had filled out an' took on flesh. He had got rough
an' blotchy soon after he had won the contest from Ben
Butler, the red squirrel, an' it was plain to all that Eugene
had done some high-toned barberin' on him before the day o'
the show.

or man Dort didn't have no affection for Columbus —
fact is, li« sort o' hated him for bein' bigger 'n Ben Butler ;
but he kept him fat an' fit so as to be ready to enter in a con-
test the minute any feller came along with a squirrel he
thought was big enough to back up with a bet. The trouble
was, that mighty few fellers out that way owned any squir-
rels, an' as the years dragged by without him gettin' any
pastime out o' Columbus, ol' man Dort's affection for him
grew thinner an' thinner. Some o' the boys discovered him
to be a woodchuck ; but no one told of it for fear the old
man would slaughter Eugene.

The old man kept on gettin' barbered, so As to have the
chance o' clashin' with Eugene about every subject which
came up ; but finallv he got so he could be shaved in a decent,
orderly manner without havin' his head tied down to the
rest. Him an' Eugene was the most antagonistic fellers I
ever met up with ; but it was a long time before me an' Spider
could think up a way to get 'em fairly at it again.

One day Spider came ridin' in from Danders, bubblin' over
with excitement, and yells out — " Pete Peabody 's got a
freak guinea-pig."

" That 's glorious news," sez I. " Let 's get all the boys
together an' hold a celebration."

"I guess a freak guinea-pig's as worthy o' bein' com-
mented on as airy other kind of freak," sez Spider, stridin'
off to the corral, purty well pouted up.

TENDER FEELINGS 137

He had n't more 'n reached it before an idee reached me,
an' I ran after him. "What is the' freakish about this
guinea-pig, Spider ? " sez I.

" He 's got a tail, ' snapped Spider.

" Ain't they all got tails? " sez I.

" You know they ain't," he sez. " You remember what
that feller from the East said last spring — if you hold up
a guinea-pig by the tail, his eyes fall out, an' then when
we did n't believe it, he told us they did n't have no tails.
Pete sez that this guinea-pig is the only one in the world
what has a tail."

" Do you reckon he 'd sell it ? "

" He 'd sell the hair off his head," sez Spider.

" Well, you go back there an' — But say, has Pete got
any others ? "

" He had ten when I left, an' no knowin' how many he 's
got by this time. Pete sez 'at guinea-pigs is the prolificest
things the' is," sez Spider.

" You buy three of 'em. Spider," sez I ; " a male one an'
a female one, an' this here freak."

" What do I want with 'em? " sez Spider.

" I '11 pay half, an' show you how to make money out of
'em," sez I.

" I don't want to tinker with no such cattle as them," sez
Spider.

" You get a fresh pony, an' it won't take you no time at
all," sez I.

So Spider got the pony an' went off grumblin'. When he
brought 'em back he had 'em in a small box an' they certainly
was curious lookin' insects. " I paid four bits apiece for the
male an' the female," sez Spider, "an' twenty-five real
dollars for the freak."

138

FRIAR TUCK

" If that 's the way prices run," sez I, " it ain't no wonder
that guinea-pigs what are ambitious to be popular, are willin'
to give up the luxury o' tails."

" Now then, what in thunder are we goin' to do with
'em ? " sez Spider.

"Get a fresh pony," sez I, "an' we'll go on over to
Boggs."

" You go to the equator! " yells Spider. " I ain't had no
sleep for a week."

" Sleep," sez I, " what 's the use o' botherin' about sleep?
You keep on losin' your strength this way, an' in about a
year they'll be trundlin' you around in a baby cart. All
right then, you stay home an' be company for the freak.
We '11 hide him up in the attic so the rats can't get him."

" Oh I could stand it to go without sleep, if I saw any
sense in it," sez Spider; "but hanged if I 'm goin' to ride
my bones through my skin just to please you."

" Suit yourself," sez I. " We '11 put the freak in the tin
cake-box an' punch a few holes in it to give him air. I '11
do that while you 're makin' up your mind about goin' along
to Boggs."

" What you goin' to do with the male an' the female? " sez
Spider as I started away.

" I 'm goin' to sell 'em to Eugene," I calls back over my
shoulder, an' then I knew I 'd have company.

" I thought you was goin' to Boggs," sez Spider as soon as
we had settled into a travelin' trot. I alius find that I get
along easier with people if I just leave 'em one or two items
to puzzle over.

" Webb Station is closer," sez I ; "an' if this deal causes
any hard feelin' it will be just as well not to be mixed up in
it ourselves."

TENDER FEELINGS

139

" I thought you was goin* to sell these to Eugene ? " sez
Spider.

" If you 'd just go to sleep, Spider," sez I, " it would save
your brain the trouble o' thinkin' up a lot o' thoughts which
ain't no use anyhow. I 'm goin' to let Shorty take 'em over
this evenin' an' sell 'em to Eugene,"

" How do you know he wants 'em ? "

" 'Cause I know Eugene," sez I. " I '11 fix up Shorty's
tale for him."

Well, we explained to Shorty the bettin' principle of
guinea-pigs, an' gave him the pigs, tellin' him he could have
all he won from Eugene on the first bet; but to then sell
'em to Eugene without lettin' any o' the other fellers know
anything about it, an' to make Eugene think that he had
picked 'em up from a train passenger, not from us.

Shorty said that he 'd go over that afternoon as soon as
the passenger had gone — Shorty was the telegraph opera-
tor — so Spider an' I came back, he sleepin' all the way.

" Where do we come in on this deal ? " sez Spider next
day.

"We'll give Eugene a chance to cut their hair a new
way, an' then we '11 go over to Boggs an' line things up."

" I 'm beginnin' to see how it could be worked out," sez
Spider, grinnin'.

In about a week we went over to Boggs, an' found the
town purty well deserted. We dropped into ol' man Dort's
to compliment Columbus some an' sympathize with Ben
Butler a little, while tryin' to hear if Eugene had made
his play yet. The ol' man was gloatin' over the fact that
Eugene wasn't havin' much trade, but he didn't mention
anything about guinea-pigs.

" You don't seem rushed, yourself," sez I.

140 FRIAR TUCK

" Course I ain't," he flares back. " Most o' the fellers
are still roundin' up, an' the rest are out huntin' for Red
Erickson."

" Red been gettin' thoughtless again? " sez I. Red Erick-
son was a big Dane who had the habit o' runnin off stock an'
shootin' any one who disagreed with him.

The or man merely pointed to a paper pinned up on the
wall offerin' fifteen hundred dollars for Red, dead or
alive. He had n't been operatin' on Diamcaid Dot stuff, so
we had n't paid much heed to him.

We strolled on over to Eugene's an' found him sittin'
down an' talkin' about the peculiar custom o' guinea-pigs;
so we knew that he had swallered the bait; but he didn't
offer to bet with us.

Then we went back an' asked ol' man Dort if he believed
that a guinea-pig's eyes would fall out if he was held up
by the tail.

"It's all rot!" sez the ol' man, indignant. "Any one
who sez such nonsense never studied the way eyes is
fastened in. The tail ain't got nothin' to do with it."
" What kind o' tails has guinea-pigs got ? " sez I.
" Why they got — " sez the ol' man, an' then stopped an'
looked blank. " What kind o' tails have they got ? "

" They have n't got any," sez I. " Now listen ; would you
be willin' to risk a little money to even up with Eugene ? "
" I 'd risk every thing I got, down to my very hide," sez
the ol' man, earnest to a degree.

" Well, then, you play careful an' we '11 provide you with
the cards," sez I. " Eugene has some guinea-pigs, an' he
is plannin' to string you on a bet. You come right along
just as though you was as ignorant as you look, have a day
fixed to decide the bet, let us know, an' for the small sum

TENDER FEELINGS

of fifty

141

provide

guinea-pij4 which

dollars wi
has a tail."

" I '11 make a pauper out of him," sez the ol' man. " I
haven't had a chance to get a bet on Columbus since I
owned him."

"You just land Eugene," sez I, "an' that'll be sport
enough for one while."

'* I got shaved twice to-day." sez the ol' man feelin' his
chin, " 'cause we got into a discussion about comets ; but I
reckon I can stand another to-morrow."

The next day the old man asked Eugene what all kind
o' game grew in Africa. " Elephants, hippopotamusses an'
guinea-pigs," sez Eugene.
"Guinea-pigs?" sez the ol' man.

" Yes, they 're the most curious animals the' is in exis-
tence," sez Eugene

"How big are they?" asked ol' man Dort. He hadn't
an idea in the world, an' was beginnin' to think that if they
sized up with elephants an' hippopotamusses, he didn't
want to have to lift one by the tail to ivin his bet.

"They ain't any bigger 'n young rabbits," sez Eugene,
stroppin' his razor; "but the curious part of 'em is that if
you hold up one by the tail, his eyes 'II drop out."

" I '11 bet a hundred dollars they would n't do it," sez the
ol' man.

" That 's a safe enough bet," sez Eugene, calm an' easy.
" They 're worth all the way up to five hundred dollars a
pair, an' it ain't likely that a man would invest that amount
in something, just to win a hundred-dollar bet."

They sparred back an' forth for a couple o' days until
finally Eugene bet nine hundred in cash — all he had in the
world —«n' his shop an' fixin's, again' eleven hundred dol-

142

FRIAR TUCK

lars, that the old man couldn't lift a guinea-pig by the
tail without his eyes fallin' out. If the ol' man did n't lift
one by the tail, he lost the bet. They set the date for a week
ahead, an' the ol' man bet Eugene three hundred dollars that
he'd win the bet, takin' Eugene's prcmiissory agreement
for his end of it.

We brought in the freak the day before the contest an'
the ol' man's eyes lit up when he see the tail. It wasn't
much of a tail at that; but it was a sure enough tail an'
plenty long enough to lift him by, an' strong enough too,
an' the' was regular bones in it, just like any tail.

The' was only a fair sized crowd of us on hand to see
the test; but Eugene went through all the preliminaries,
an' then took the cover off his box an* pointed to the
gumea-pigs. He had shaved the parts of 'em where tails
naturally belong, an' when the boys see that they didn't
have no tails, they howled with laughter an' began to hoot
ol' man Dort ; an' Eugene confided to 'em the plans he had
for spendin' the money he 'd won.

or man Dort, he walked calmly up to the box, examined
the guinea-pigs, an sez : " These here is not the full-
blooded guinea-pigs. The full-blooded ones live in a moun-
taineous country an' use their tails to steer with when they
jump from rock to rock ; while this kind live in swamps an'
the young aligators keep on eatin' oflf their tails until they
don't have any. I '11 go get a thoroughbred an' do my
liftin' on him."

Well this set 'em back a good ways; an' as the ol' man
was walkin' off to get his own speciment, a good many bets
was put up, but Eugene did n't take any.

Purty soon, back come the ol' man; an' hanged if he
had n't clipped the hair oflf o' his one's tail too. He reached

TENDER FEELINGS

143

in his hand an' stroked the long-faced little duffer, an' sez :
" Gently, George the Third, gently." Then he put on an
anxious look an' picked up the guinea-pig by the tail, holdin'
his other hand underneath to catch any eyes what happened
to spill out. They did n't none drop out, an' the crowd give
a cheer; but Eugene was all in.

He was a bad loser was Eugene, an' he did n't join in the
festivities any. He just took up his two guineas an' wen:
back to his shop, while the rest of us celebrated a few.
After a time me an' Spider went to console with him a
little. He was so infernally down in the mouth that I began
to get a little conscience-struck. Eugene said he had been
savin' up his money to pay off the mortgage on his birth-
place; an' he made a purty sad story out of it. Fact was,
that he made so sad a story out of it that I decided to get
him back his tools and give him a new start.

I
i

1 1

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

THEMIS IN THE ROCKIES

" How much money you got, Spider? " I sez.

" I reckon I got sixty dollars," sez Spider.

" I don't mean just what you got with ya, I mean how
much cash do you possess in the world."

" I suppose I could raise a hundred an' fifteen," sez Spider,
after thinkin' a while. " What do you want to know for? "

" We got to give Eugene a start," sez I.

Spider looked at me until he saw I was in earnest, an'
then he talked out loud. " What 's the matter with you? "
he yells. "We haven't adopted Eugene, have we? Why-
f or do we have to give him a start ? Did n't he lose at his
own game. Great Snakes ! You make me tired I "

" That was a low-down trick we played," sez I.

" It was n't no lower down 'n him ringin' in a woodchuck
on the old man ; and all we did it for was to square things
up."

" Yes," sez I ; " but it took us some several years to
square it up, and I don't intend to have Eugene's moanful
voice surgin' through my ears until I 'm able to think up a
come-back for him. I 'm goin' to give him a start, and if
you don't feel like riskin' your money, I '11 do it alone."

" Do you mean 'at you 're just goin' to pay over the price
of his tools, an' let it go at that? " sez Spider.

" That would n't be any fun," sez I. " I 'm goin' to get
the tools; but I intend to get 'em for as little expense as

THEMIS IN THE ROCKIES 145

possible, and if I can have a little fun out of it, I don't in-
tend to pass it up."

Spider studied it over a while. " Well, I '11 risk fifty," he
sez after a bit ; so we went back to Eugene's.

*' Would you be willin' to do a stunt to get back your
tools?" sez I.

He raised a pair o' weepy eyes to me an' sez : " Aw, the'
ain't no show. I 've a good mind to kill myself."

"Please don't do that," sez Spider, who never could
stand a bad loser. " When you lose your money, you alius
stand a chance to win more money ; but when you lose your
life, why, the' ain't nothin' left except to go up an' find out
what reward it earned for you."

" Aw hell," muttered Eugene.

" Ye-es," agreed Spider, talkin' through his nose, like a
missionary preacher, "I reckon that is about what you'd
draw, if you was to cash in now ; but if you stick around
an' do your duty, you run the risk o' havin' better luck
later on."

After Spider had insulted Eugene until he began to sass
back a little, I broke in and sez that if Eugene will agree
to do what I tell him, I '11 agree to get him back his outfit ;
so then he wants to know what I have in mind.

" Are you willin' to disguise yourself as a genuwine moun-
tain trapper?" sez I.

When I sez this, Spider exploded a laugh which would 'a'
hurt the feelin's of a sheep, and Eugene tied into us as
wordy as a fox terrier; but I soothed him down an' told
him I was in earnest. " I 'm willin' to do most anything
K) get my tools back," sez Eugene ; " but I don't see how
( can make myself look like a genuwine trapper."

" Have you got any false wigs and beards?" sez I.

{•I

146

FRIAR TUCK

" No, I have n't," sez he ; " but I saved up the stuff I
reaped off o' ol' man Dort, and I reckon I could make
some."

" The very thing ! " sez I. " You fix up a rig that '11 make
you look to be a hundred years old ; and we '11 hunt up
clothes for ya. All you '11 have to do will be to guide a
green Eastener out to shoot a bear, and we '11 have the bear
and everything ready for ya."

" No, ya don't," sez Eugene. " I don't fool around no
bears."

" I thought you was tired o' life," sez Spider.

" Well, I 'm not so tired of it that I 'm willin' to have it
squeezed out o' me by a bear," sez Eugene.

" This won't be a real bear," sez I ; " and anyhow, they '11
be a ravine between you and it. You claimed once to be
a show actor, and all you 'U have to do will be to pertend
'at you 're actin'."

" I once was a genuwine amateur actor," sez Eugene,
" and if you '11 make it clear to me that there ain't no danger,
I '11 take the job."

Then I explained just what he had to do; and after this
me an' Spider, who was now keen for the outcome, went
around to dicker with ol' man Dort. He was bumpin'
around among the clouds, so we did n't have any trouble in
buyin' back Eugene's stuff on time. When I asked him
what he'd charge for Columbus, the woodchuck, he gave
a snort, and said he 'd throw him in for good measure ; so
I told him to just keep him out o' sight for a few days, and
we started back to Eugene's.

"What do you want with that dog-gone woodchuck?"
asked Spider.

" I want him to take the part of a grizzly bear," sez I.

THEMIS IN THE ROCKIES 147

Spider stopped an' looked at me. " This is goin' too far,"
sez he. " It 's bad enough to try to fool some one into
believin' 'at Eugene 's a genuwine trapper ; but you could n't
make a rag doll believe 'at Columbus was a grizzly bear."

" You go borrow that squaw dress from Ike Spargle, an'
then we '11 see how much like a trapper Eugene '11 look,"
sez I.

I went on an' found 'at Eugene had done a master job o'
wig makin', even fixin' false eyebrows, an' when he put
on ol' man Dort's hair-crop he looked older 'n the human
race. As soon as Spider came in with the squaw dress, we
put it on Eugene; and while he didn't look like anything
I 'd ever seen before, he looked more like the first man 'at
ever started trappin' than like anything else, an' Spider
Kelley nearly had a convulsion.

We bunked with Eugene that night ; but he kept us awake
bemoanin' his cruel fate until Snider threatened to drown
him head first in a bucket o' water and after that we had a
little go at slumbcrin'. I routed 'em out about two an'
drilled 'em up to the high ground above Spear Crick, where
we waited until sun-up. Eugene was wearin' his trapper
i"iggin', and in the starlight, he sure was a ghastly sight.

Just across from us on the other side o' the crick was
Sholte's Knoll, and when the sun rose, I lined us up to be
just in a direct line with it across ti - knoll. Both Eugene
and Spider bothered me with questions and discouragin'
kicks; but I felt purty sure my scheme would work, and
only told 'em what was really *or their good.

The crick ran south in a gorge, and just below us it ran
into Rock River, which came from the east and made a
sharp turn to the south just where Spear Crick ran into it.
After the sun was up, we climbed vlown a circlin' trail until

148 FRIAR TUCK

we came to Rock River. Eugene refused to try to ford it ;
but Spider and I went across and up to Ivan's Knoll. Rock
River was bigger than Spear Crick, and Ivan's Knoll was
bigger than Sholte's Knoll; but not one tenderfoot in a
million could have told 'em apart, and Spider got gleeful at
the plan — except that he kept at me to know who I was
tryin' to land. Back of Ivan's Knoll was a round hole about
ten feet across, called the Bottomless Pit, because the' was
no bottom to ' After examinin' this place, we went on
and crossed Rov.. River again until we came out at Sholte's
Knoll across from where the shootin' was to be done.

" What you are to do. Spider," sez I, " is to be at this
place before dawn with Columbus tied by a stout cord. Tie
him to the rock at the south end of the knoll by a weak
cord, then pass your stout cord up over that jag o' rock
at the top, and just as soon as the sur. hits the knoll, pull
hard enough to break the weak cOrd, lead him gently up the
slope until he has been shot at several times, then — "

" Is Eugene, that genuwine, ancient trapper goin' to do
the shoo^-ii'?" interrupted Spider.

" He is not," sez I. " If Columbus gets shot, all you '11
have to do will be to wind around to Boggs and meet me
there. If he don't get shot, you can either turn him adrift,
kill him yourself, or pack him back to ol' man Dort's, ac-
cordin' to the dictates o' your own conscience. I '11 bring
the party 'at does the shootin' up to Ivan's Knoll, an' make
him think the bear has fallen down the Bottomless Pit after
he was shot."

" Happy," sez Spider, " hanged if I believe it '11 go
through ; and I won't be a sucker tmless you tell me who is
to do the shootin'."

" Horace," sez I, " Horace Walpole Bradford."

THEMIS IN THE ROCKIES 149

Spider's face changed expression a half dozen times in
two moments ; but he did n't have any more kicks ; so we
went back to Eugene, and took him up to a de. •- <.d cabin,
where he was to stay until needed. I left him and Spider to
fix up the ca'oin, while I went back to the Dot to fix up
Horace. Horace had a lot o' money; but it did go
again' me to make him pay for Engene's outfit by puttin'
up a nru'tv^al joke on him. Still, I I'eU called upon to
squarr it p wit'- Fnsrene, and this seemed the fairest
way.

VVh.n \ rp.ch'u the P ,% Horace came forth to meet me;
ami lie was to v{ ad tc ^ f me 'at I purt' nigh gave up the
scheme; but ' lin ' got e too far to back out now, so I
a -t^d CO. i, n* i nit him short with my answers.

Afte. su; per f ^ri lank started on bear. He saw I had
somethinn ; my ^hi ^c, so he talked bear until Horace's
mouth begai* ic \.aicr. " I 'd give a hundred dollars, just
to get a shot at a bear," sez Horace.

"This ain't the time o' the year to hunt bear," sez I.
" Food 's so common at this season that a bear spends most
of his time loafin' ; and it 's hard to get sight o' one. Course,
if you was to go to a professional hunter, he 'd know where
bears were spendin' their vacation; but it might take a
month for one of us to root one out."

" Do you know of any professional hunters ? " sez he.

I didn't say nothin', and Tank told of some he knew
several hundred miles off. v fter Tank had talked himself
out, I mentioned careless 1.: ^ that old Pierre La Blanc
was livin' less 'n twenty miles away ; but that I doubted if
he 'd take a bear-huntin' job. I went on to state that he had
money saved up, and it would take a sight o' coin to tempt
him.

ISO FRIAR TUCK

" I 'd give five hundred dollars for a shot at a real grizzly,"
sez Horace.

" Did you ever use a rifle? " sez I.

"Ask Tank," sez Horace.

Tank told about Horace havin' borrowed ol' Cast Steel's
forty-five-seventy, and that he had learned to hit a mark
with it in able shape. Before we turned in that night, I
had let Horace tease me into takin' him over to Pierre's
next day.

We reached the old cabin next afternoon, and found it
lookin' purty comfortable. Eugene had soiled his hands
and what part of his face showed; and he certainly did
look outlandish. He could act some, I '11 say that for him ;
and he pertended so natural that it took Tank a half hour
to tell who he was. He didn't talk much, but when he
did he used broken French, and he made a contract with
Horace to get the five hundred as soon as he had showed
him the bear, Tank to hold the check.

Eugene could n't get food through his whiskers ; so he
said most of his teeth were gone, and et his supper in pri-
vate. After supper, I stole down the gulch and found
Spider waitin'. He promised to be on hand the next mornin'
and we turned in early.

Next mornin' we started at three, and took up our place
at the mark I had made across from Sholte's Knoll. Horace
thought it perfectly wonderful that the old trappe; would
know exactly where a grizzly bear would be at sun-up ; and
he chattered constant in a hushed voice. We told him it
was a full qur.rter across to the knoll, and he had a regular
ecstasy about how deceivin' the atmosphere was — which
was rank libel, the al.nosphere bein' about the least de-
ceivin' member o' that party.

THEMIS IN THE ROCKIES 151

Presently, I caught the smell o* dawn, and I told Horace
to keep his eyes g'ued on Chimney Peak, a little over twenty
miles to the west. He did so, and in about five minutes, a
gob o' rich crimson splashed on it, rippled down the sides,
and poured along the foothills at the bottom. Horace gave
a gasp. You don't see such a dawn as that with your eyes
alone; you see it with somethin' inside your bosom; an I
when I saw the gleam in Horace's eyes, it made me feel
ashamed of what I was up to ; but I could n't stop just for
this; so I nudged Eugene, and that hoary old trapper
gfrowled out to Horace to watch the knoll, or he 'd miss his
chance.

Horace was surprised to see the east still in a black
shadow. He started to speak words about it, but just then
the sun, lookin' like an acre of red fire, jumped up from
behind Sholte's Knoll like a sacred jack-rabbit.

The knoll was consid'able higher than us, and just as the
sun was half-circle behind it, a gigantic form started to walk
across it from south to north. I knew, positive, that this
was Columbus the woodchuck; but it was just all I could
do to believe it, myself, and Horace thought it was the
biggest silver-tip in creation. I did n't think the woodchuck
ran much risk of gettin' shot ; but Horace did n't lose his
nerve a particle. He banged away, Columbus gave a lurch,
took a snap at his side, and rolled out o' sight behind the
knoll, as natural as a fried egg.

Horace jumped up and down, hugged himself, slapped us
on the back, and almost knocked the aged trapper's fur off;
but if he had, I doubt if he would have noticed it, he was
so eager to get to his first bear.

We wound down the path, and he complained about it
bein' so much farther 'n he had expected; but I spoke a

152 FRIAR TUCK

few words about the atmosphere, and he was soothed.
When we struck Rock River, he was surprised to see how
much wider it was than it looked from where he 'd shot ;
but he did n't falter none about goin' in ; while I purt' nigh
had to twist ofiF the seasoned trapper's arm before he 'd get
his feet wet. The water was purty high, and Tank and I
had our hands full gettin' 'em across.

We climbed the trail on the other side to Ivan's Knoll.
This was about a mile south o' Sholte's Knoll, and natu-
rally I did n't expect to find any game on the other side of
it; so you can judge my feelin's when we got around to
the other side, and saw that wooJchuck's carcass, lyin' flat
on its back with its front feet folded across a piece o' paper.

Horace saw it, too ; but he was n't interested at first, and
dove all about, loolcin' for his bear. He was plumb wild;
but finally he picked up the piec o' paper, and read what
was wrote on it in scrawly letters, which I knew to be the
work o' Spider Kelley : " Before I was shot I was a grizzly
bar but it made me feel so small to get shot by a tender-
foot that I have shrank to what you see befor you."

That confounded Kelley had n't been able to resist workin'
the joke back on me ; so he had toted Columbus down from
Sholte's Knoll, and then skipped. I knew I would n't see
him for some time — but I also knew I wouldn't forget
what was comin' to him when I did.

Horace . jad the note through in silence, then he looked
at the remains of the woodchuck, then he read the note
again, and his face got like a sunset. He read the note once
more, and then he leaped through the air for that veteran
trapper, and grabbed him by the beard. The beard and wig
came off in his hands, and Eugene started to flee, with
Horace a close second, kickin' the seat o' that squaw dress at

THEMIS IN THE ROCKIES 1-3

every jump. Horace was in able shape, and Eugene was
flimsy ; so when he tripped and rolled over, Horace got him
by the ears, and proceeded to beat his head on a stone, the
way Tank had told about doin' to the unobligin' old miner.

I pulled Horace off to save Eugene's life, and then Horace
pulled out a gun and tried to take my life. It took us two
solid hours to cool Horace down below the boilin' point;
and then he started off alone with his lips set and his eye-
brows pulled down to the bridge of his nose. I liked him
better 'n ever. He was as game as they made 'em, and had
even forgot the check 'at ol' Tank Williams was still holdin' ;
but I was honestly worried about Eugene.

Part of it may have been due to havin' his head beat
mellow on a stone ; but still he alius did lack sand when he
was losin', and now he sat tuggin' at his real hair an' swearin'
he was ruined, and would take his own life the first chance
he had. It was partly my fault ; so I made Tank help me
tote back Eugene's needin's from the deserted cabin to his
shop, Eugene goin' along in a stupor and repeatin' to us
constant that he intended to drink his own heart's blood.

I sent Tank back to the Dot to see what he could do toward
pacifyin' Horace, and then I returned the squaw dress to
Ike Spargle. He broke into a side-split when I stepped into
his place, and fairly daluged me with liquor ; but I was n't
in no mood for it. Ike told me 'at Spider had gone out to
the Dot to notify that he had quit temporary ; and then he
was goin' ou. to hunt down Red Erickson for the bounty.
Ike was equally willin' to talk about bears or Red Erickson ;
but I was n't conversational, so I went back to Eugene's.

He had his door locked, and at first refused me admit-
tance; but finally he let me in. and I told him I would let
him have his outfit on time. He wouldn't scarcely listen

154 FRIAR TUCK

to me; so the best I could do was to get his promise that
he would n't slay himself inside the house, as the boys were
superstitious again' it, and would bum it down. As it was
again' my credit at ol' man Dort's, I felt more agreeable
toward payin' for a standin' house, than for just the ashes
of one.

" When I 'm gone, Happy," sez Eugene, " I want you to
send my watch back to Sommersville, Connecticut. That 's
all I ask of ya. You 've been as near a friend to me as any
one in this ungodly community has, and I don't bear ya no
ill will. If I could just have paid off that mortgage — "

I shook hands with him and went outside, where I settled
myself comfortable and made ready to keep watch on him
until he started to drink. I felt sure that if he 'd once get
to elevatin' a bottle, it would take his mind off suicide ; but
he paced up and down inside his room until I was purt' nigh
out o' my own head.

It must have been nine in the evenin' when he stole out
his side door with a forty-five under his coat ; and started
up the ravine which opens west o' town, and I follered like
a coyote.

He went up it about a mile, an' then he stopped an' I flat-
tened out an' crept closer an' closer. I knew he would make
a few remarks first, even though he was alone, an' I judged
I could wriggle up close enough to grab him in the act.

He fished out his gun, an' I see that he did n't savvy the
use of it, which put a little uncertainty into my end o' the
game.

" Farewell, cruel world," he muttered mournfully, ustn'
his gun to gesture with. " Farewell, sweet dreams of child-
hood ; farewell ambition an' love an' dear tyianic duty ; fare-
well moon an' stars an' gentle breezes, farewell — "

ffl

THEMIS IN THE ROCKIES 155

Eugene would probably have gone on sayin' farewell to
each particular thing in the world until he talked himself
to sleep, but just then a pebble slipped from the side o' the
ravine and rolled to his feet, and he stopped with a jerk an'
listened. Then he straightened himself an' sez in a deter-
mined tone : " Nobody can't prevent me. I shall end it
now."

Before I could move, he placed the muzzle to his forehead
an' fired, roUin' over on his back. I heard a sort of cough,
like when a man hits his best with an ax, an' somethin' came
plumpin' down the ravine like an avalanche.

I rushed up, lit a match, an' there on his back was Eugene,
a small red welt on his forehead, but looking calm and satis-
fied, while almost on top of him lay a man in a heap. I
straightened him out, lit another match, an' looked at the
stranger. His hair was flarain' red an' you could have lied
his red mustaches around the back of his neck. He was
shot through the forehead an' plumb dead.

I saw how it was in a flash : Eugene had almost missed
himself, but had shot Red Erickson, who had been hidin' up
the side of the ravine behind him. I slipped Red's empty
gun into his hand, emptied Eugene's gun; an' then I tore
for town, gathered up the boys an' told 'em that Eugene had
gone up the ravine bent on mischief. We got a lantern and
hurried up the ravine where Eugene was just comin' back
to genuwine consciousness again.

He sat there with his head in his hands tryin' to cheer him-
self with some o' the mournfullest moanin' ever I heard.
I held the lantern to Red's face a moment an' bawled out :
" Boys, this is Red Erickson ! Him an' Eugene has been
duelin', an' they have killed each other."

This gave Eugene his cue — an' a cue was all Eugene

156 FRIAR TUCK

ever needed. He pulled himself together, took plenty o'
time to get the lay o' the land ; an' then he gave us a tale
o' that fight which laid over anything I ever heard in that
line.

We carried 'em back to town, an' Eugene was a hero for
true. He got the reward all right, paid off his debts, an' kept
addin' details to that fight until it was enough to keep a
feller awake nights. His reputation picked up right along
until even ol' man Dort had to admit the' was more to
Eugene than he had allowed.

Next day when I got back to the Diamond Dot, I found
Horace all packed up for leavin'; and it made me feel
mournful to the bones o' my soul. I did n't know how much
I thought of him until he started to pull out ; and I felt so
ashamed at what I had done, that I offered to let him kick
me all about the place if he 'd just forget about it and stick
along.

But Horace had a stiff neck, all right, and he would n't
give in. Tank had had all he could do to get Horace to take
the check back ; and now, try as I would, I could n't get him
to stay. I drove over to the station with him, and we had
a long talk together. He was in a good humor when he left,
and I could see he was wishful to stay ; but havin' made up
his mind, he stuck to it. He said he had had more fun while
with us than durin' all the procedure of his life ; and that if
we had just kept the joke among us Dotters, he would n't
have felt so cut up about it. I told him he had acted just
right and that I had acted dead wrong, although it was him
takin' Tank's word above mine which had first made me
sore.

This was new light to him, and he softened up immedi-
ate. Fact was, we got purt' nigh girlish before the train

THEMIS IN THE ROCKIES 157

pulled out with him wavin' his handkerchief from the back
porch.

I still feel some shame about this episode; and if any o'
you fellers ask any more questions to lead me into tellin'
of my own silly pranks, why, I '11 drive you off the place,
and then get my lips sewed shut.

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

KIT MURRAY

After Horace had left, I felt purty lonely for a while. It 's
hard for me to look back and keep things in regular order ;
because the different lines cross each other and get mixed
up. Always, little Barbie's affairs came first with me ; but
I reckon most of you have heard her story, so I 'm keepin'
shy of it this time. First of all there was my innermost life,
which would have been mostly mine no matter where I *d
gone; then there was the part of my life which touched
Barbie's, and this was the best and the highest part of it;
and then there was the part which touched Friar Tuck an'
a lot of others, each one of which helped to make me what
I am ; but back of it all was my work ; so it 's not strange if
I find it hard to stick to the trail of a story.

Anyway, it was while I was fcelin' lonesome about Horace
leavin' that the Friar first began to use me as a trump card,
and called on me for whatever he happened to want done.
I was mighty fond o' bein' with the Friar ; so I lent myself
to him whenever I could, and we got mighty well acquainted.
He loved fun of a quiet kind ; but the' was alius a sadness
in his eyes which toned down my natural devilment and
softened me. The' was lots o' things I used to enjoy doin',
which I just couldn't do after havin' been with the Friar
a spell, until I had give myself a good shakin', like a dog
comin' up out o' water.

For several quiet years about this time, I used to act as

KIT MURRAY

scout for him, now and again, goin' ahead to round up .i
bunch when he had time to give 'em a preachin' ; or goin'
after him when sonir one who could n't afford a doctor was
took sick. We talked about purt' nigh everything, except
that some way, we did n't talk much about women ; so I was
never able to pump his own story out of him, though he
knew exactly how I felt toward Barbie, long before I did
myself.

Durin' these years, the Friar tried his best to get on terms
with the Ty Jones crowd ; but they refused to get friendly,
and the more he did to make things better in the territory,
the more they hated him.

It was right after the spring round-up that I first heard
the Friar's name mixed up with a woman. This alius makes
me madder 'n about anything else. When a man and a
woman sin, why, it 's bad enough, and I 'm not upholdin' it ;
but still in a way it 's natural, the same as a wolf killin' a
calf. It 's the cow-puncher's business to kill the wolf if he
can, and he ought to do it as prompt as possible. This is all
right ; but gossip and scandal is never all right.

Gossip and scandal is like supposin' the wolf had only
wounded the calf a little, and a posse would gather and tie
the two of 'em together, the wolf and the wounded calf;
and take 'em into the center square of a town and keep 'em
tied there for all to see until they had starved to death ; and
then to keep on stirrin' up the carrion day after day as long
as a shred of it remained.

The Friar was alius a great one to be talkin' about the
power of habits. He said that if folks would just get into
the habit of lookin' for sunshiny days, an' smilin' faces an'
noble deeds, and such like, that first thing they knew they 'd
think the whole world had changed for the better ; but in-

i6o

FRIAR TUCK

stead o' this they got into the habit of lo(dcin' for evil, and
as that was what they were on the watch for, o' course they
found it. He said it \ as like a cat watchin' for a mouse.
The cat would plant her'^t-lf in front of the mouse hole and
not do anything else but just watch for the mouse. While
she would be on guard, a king might be assassinated, a city
might fall in an earthquake, and a ship-load o' people go
down at sea ; but if the mouse came out and the cat got it,
she would amuse herself with it a while, eat it and then
curl up before the fire and purr about what a fine day it had
been, all because she had got what she had been lookin' for ;
and the's a lot in this.

Now, when I came to think it over, I had n't heard the
Friar express himself very free on women. I had heard him
say to alius treat 'em kind an' square, the good ones and
the bad; but when ya come to ponder over this, it wasn't
no-wise definite. Still I couldn't believe ill of him; so I
took a vacation an' started to hunt him up.

The feller who had told me did n't know much about it,
but the feller who had told him knew it all. When I found
this feller, he was in the same fix ; and he sent me along to
the one who had told him. They were all a lot alike in not
knowin' it all ; but I finally found out who the girl was.

She was a girl named Kit Murray, and she alius had been
a lively young thing with a purty face, an' could ride an'
shoot like a man. She had took part in a couple o' frontier-
day exhibitions, and it had turned her head, and she had
gone out with a show. When she had come back, she had
put on more airs 'n ever, and naturally the boys were some
wild about her — though I had n't seen her myself.

News o' this kind travels fast, and I heard buzzin' about
it everywhere; but it was just like all other scandal. Most

KIT MURRAY i6i

people, when they gossip, believe an' tell the story which
comes closest to what they 'd 'a' done if they 'd had the same
chance; and what I figured out to be true was, that Olaf
the Swede and another Cross-brander by the name o' Bud
Fisher had scrapped about the girl, Olaf near killin' the
kid and the girl runnin' off to the Friar. Now, all the good
deeds 'at the Friar had done had n't caused much talk ; but
this news spread like wild-fire; and a lot o' those he had
helped the most turned again' him and said they wished they
could find out where he was hidin'.

I took it just the other way ; I knew the Friar purty well,
and what I feared most was, that he wasn't hidin' at all,
and that Olaf would find him before I could give him
wamin'. It was two weeks before I found the Friar; but
once I came upon Olaf, face to face, and we eyed each other
purty close. This was the first time I ever noticed his eyes.
They were the queerest eyes I ever saw, a sort of blue ; but a
deeper blue, a bluer blue 'n anything I had ever seen out-
side a flower. The's a flower on the benches in June just
the color of his eyes, a soft, ^relvety flower ; but Olaf 's eyes
were n't soft and velvety the day we met, and they gave me
a queer, creepy feelin'. I hope I did n't show it any ; but I
did feel relieved after I 'd passed him.

Finally I found the Friar, just as I might have expected
— by the sound of his voice. I had got clear over into the
Basin and was crossin' through Carter Pass when I heard
his voice above me, singin' one of his marchin' songs. I was
mightily rejoiced to find him ; but I had that all out of my
face by the time I had wound around up to him. He was
totin' a log on his shoulder, and struttin' along as jaunty
as though the whole earth was simply his backyard.

" Here," I growls to him, indignant, " what do you mean

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^S (716) 288 - 5989 - fo«

i62 FRIAR TUCK

by makin' such a noise? Haven't you got a grain o'
gumption ! "

He looked up at me with the surprise stickin' out from
under his grin. "Well, well, well!" sez he. "Who are
you — the special officer for the prevention of noise ? "

" I ain't no special officer of anything," I answers ; " but
the's people lookin' for you, and you ought to have sense
enough to keep quiet."

" And I 'm lookin' for people," sez he, grinnin' like a
boy; '^and the best way to find 'em is by makin' a noise.
The' ain't any rules again' walkin' on the grass up here is
there?"

" Olaf the Swede is after you on account o' the gal," I
blunted; "and he ain't no bluffer. He intends to do away
with you for good and all; and you 'd better be makin' your
plans."

" Coin' to do away with me for good an' all," he repeats,
smilin'. " Well, Olaf the Swede is a gross materialist. The
worst he can do will be to tear off my wrapper and leave me
free to find out a lot of things I m deeply interested in.
Why, Happy, you 're all worked up ! You 've lost your phi-
losophy, you 've become a frettish old woman. What you
need is a right good scare to straighten you up again.
This Olaf the Swede is part of Ty Jones's outfit, isn't
he?"

"He is," I replied, shakin' my head in warnin', "and
the whole gang '11 back him up in this."

" Good ! " sez the Friar, smackin' his hand. " I 've wanted
an openin' wedge into that outfit ever since I came out here.
Of a truth, the Lord doth move in a mysterious way, his
wonders to perform."

" We'l, he certainly will have to perform some mysterious

KIT MURRAY

163
I was put

wonders to get you out of this scrape," I gjiid.
out at the way he took it.

" Don't be irreverent, Happy/' sez he, the joy-lights
dancin' in his eyes. " V/e are all merely instruments, and
why should an instrument take it upon itself to question the
way it is used. Where is this Olaf ? "

" I met him yesterday ; and for all I know, he 's been fol-
lowin' me."

" Fine, fine ! " sez the Friar. " Now, yoiv go on back to
the Diamond Dot, and I '11 go back over your trail and save
Olaf as much bother as possible,"
" I 'm goin' along with you," I sez.
" No," sez he.
" Yes," sez I.

" It '11 make folks think 'at I 'm afraid for my skin, and
have you along for protection," sez he, gettin' earnest.

" If you had good judgment, you would be afraid for your
skin," sez I. " I tell you that Olaf is after your blood. He 's
one o' the worst ; he kills with his bare hands when he gets
the chance."

" Fine, fine ! " sez the Friar again, his eyes glowin' joy-
ous. " I 'd have a right to defend myself with my hands,
Happy. I would have a right to do this, for the sake of
Olaf, you see — to prevent him from risking his own soul
by committin' murder. This is a great chance for mc,
Happy ; now, please, please, go on back like a good fellow."
I was secretly tickled at the argument the Friar had put
up for a chance at physical warfare — and a barehand fight
between him and Olaf would have been worth goin' a long
way to see — but I was as obstinate as either of 'em; so
I just said 'at I was goin' along.
" Well, you 're not goin' with me," sez the Friar, as pouty

164

FRIAR TUCK

as a schoolboy. " I 'II not speak to ya, and I 'U not have a
thing to do with ya " ; and he threw down his log and glared
at me.

I took a certain amount o' pride because the Friar lived
up to his own standards; but I also found a certain deep-
rooted amusement in havin' him slip out from under 'em for
a spell and display a human disposition which was purty
much kindred to my own. " What do you purpose doin'
with that club, Friar ? " I asked, pointin' to the log he had
flung down.

He pulled in his glare and looked to be a little discom-
posed. " Why I — I 'm livin' in a cave I got back there."

" Are you dead set again' havin' a little company ? " sez I,
slow an' insinuatin', " or are ya livin' alone ? "

First off, he was inclined to be resentful, then he grinned,
shouldered his log again, and said : " Come and see."

I foUered him back into the hills until we came to a little
park in which his ponies were grazin', and then I hobbled
mine, cached my gear alongside his, and trailed after him
again. His path turned a crag and then skirted along the
edge of a cliff as straight up and down as the real truth.
The path kept gettin' narrower, until every time the Friar
turned a comer ahead of me, I expected to see him walkin'
off in the air with the log still on his shoulder.

Presently I turned a corner around which he had disap-
peared, and there wasn't a soul in sight. The ledge still
led along the cliff; but it had got thinner than a lawyer's
excuse, and a worm could n't have walked along it without
hangin' on. While I stood there puzzlin' about it, a hand
reached out o' the side of the cliff, and the Friar's voice said
mockingly : " Take my hand, little one ; and then shut your
eyes for fear you might get dizzy."

KIT MURRAY

i6;

Then I saw a jag of rock stickin' out just above my head,
I grabbed it with my left hand, and swung around into what
was the mouth of a cave. It was nothin' but a crack about
eighteen inches wide, and the far side was sunk in enough
to keep it hid from where I was standin*. The Friar was
standin' a few feet back in the entrance with his log leanin'
up again' the side. " I know not what other animals may
have sought shelter here," he said, " but for the past three
years this has been my castle, and, Happy Hawkins," —
here the Friar bowed low — " obstinate and unreasonable as
you are, I offer you a hearty welcome."

The Friar said this in fun, but the' was an undertone to
it which tightened the laces around my heart consid'able.
Well, that cave was a sure enough surprise; he had three
or four pelts and a couple of Injun blankets on the floor,
he had a couple o' barrels fixed to catch snow water,
he had some cookin' tools; and books! Say, he must
have had as many as a hundred books, all of 'em hard-
shells, and lookin' so edicated an' officious that I had to
take off my hat before I had nerve enough to begin readin'
the titles.

After I 'd taken everything in, I sat down in an easy chair
he 'd made out o' saplin's and rawhide, and looked all about ;
but I could n't see any signs of their bein' any other rooms
to this cave; and then I jumped square for the mark, and
sez : " Friar, the's a lot o' talk about you bavin' run oflf with
Kit Murray. Now I v.ant the straight of it."

His face went grave and a little hurt. " It 's strange," he
said after a time, " how hard it is for a man to believe in his
own guilt, and how easy for him to believe in the guilt of his
neighbor. Have you had any dinner ? "

" Yes," sez I. " I did n't know just where I was headin' ;

til
ill

-I

l66 FRIAR TUCK

so I et three different times this momin' to make sure of
havin' enough to run on in case of emergency."

" It 's a fine thing to be an outdoor animal," sez the Friar,
smilin'. " Well then, I 've made up my mind to take you to
see Kit Murray."

He did n't waste any time askin' me not to talk about
what was other folks' affairs; he just went to the door,
grabbed the jag of rock, swung around to the ledge, and I
foUered after.

We saddled up, rode down a windin' path 'at I 'd never
heard of before, and then rode up again until we came to a
little clump o' swamp shrubbery, backed up again' the north
face o' Mount Mizner. We foUered a twisty path through
this and finally came out on an open space in which stood a
fair-sized cabin. He whistled a five-note call, and the door
was opened by an old woman who was a stranger to me.
" Mother Shipley, this is Happy HawMns," sez he. " How 's
Kit?"

The old woman gave me a gimlf t look, and then her sharp
features expanded to a smile, and she bobbed her head.
" Kit 's gettin' hard to manage," sez she.

We went into the cabin, and found Kit with a bandage
around her ankle, sittin' in a rockin' chair, and look'i' pa-
tiently disgusted. She was a fine-lookin' girl, with a fair
streak of boy in her, and she had never had enough practice
at bein' an invalid to shine at it. Her face lit up at the Friar ;
but her gaze was mighty inquirin' when she turned it at me.

"You know Happy Hawkins, don't ya?" sez the Friar.
She nodded her head, and he went on. " Well, he 's one o'
the fellers you can trust, if you trust him entire ; but he 's
got such a bump of curiosity that if you don't tell it all to
him in the first place, he can't do no other work until he

KIT MURRAY 167

finds it out on his own hook. He 's my friend, and he '11
be your friend; so I want you to tell him just how things
are, and then he '11 be under obligations to do whatever we
want him to."

So Kit cut loose and told me her story. Her father, ol'
Jim Murray, had got crippled up about ten years before, and
since then had become a professional homesteader, nosin'
out good places, an' then sellin' out to the big cattle outfits.
He also made it his business to find ways to drive off genu-
wine homesteaders ; and in addition to this he was a home
tyrant and hard to live with. He alius had plenty o' money,
but was generally dead broke when it came to pleasant words
an' smiles — which was why Kit had gone oflF with the
show.

While she was away, she had married a low-grade cuss,
who had misused her beyond endurance; so when he had
skipped with another woman, she had come back to the old
man. She did n't want folks 'at knew her to find out how
bad hit she 'd been ; so she had tried to bluflf it out ; but the
young fellers kept fallin' in love with her and wantin' to
marry her. She had n't meant no harm ; but she had played
one again' the other, hopin' they 'd soon have their feelin's
hurt and let her alone. This was a fool notion, but she had
been honest in it.

Bud Fisher, the Texas kid in the Ty Jones outfit, had got
daflfy about her ; and then one night at a dance she had shot
some smiles into the eyes of Olaf the Swede. She said he
was such a glum-lookin' cuss she had no idee he would take
it serious ; but he had stood lookin' into her eyes with his
queer blue ones, until she had felt sort o' fainty ; and from
that on, he had declared war on all who glanced at her.

Bud Fisher thought it a fine joke for Olaf to fall in love,

i68

FRIAR TUCK

and he had teased him to the limit. This made a bad condi-
tion, and all through the spring round-up, each had done as
much dirt as possible to the other ; but Ty was mighty strict
about his men fightin' each other; so they had n't come to a
clash.

Finally the kid brags that he is goin' to elope with Kit;
and then Olaf kicks off his hobbles an' starts to stampede.
The kid was wise enough to vamoose; so Olaf rides down
to ol' man Murray's, and reads the riot act to him. Kit was
hidin' in the back room and heard it all. He told the old
man that he would slaughter any one who eloped with Kit
or who had a hand in it ; and then he had gone back to hunt
the kid again.

The ol' man turned in and gave Kit a complete harrowin'
as soon as Olaf had left and she had told him pointedly that
she 'd eat dirt before she 'd eat his food again ; so she sad-
dled her pony and started to ride without knowin' where.
Her pony had slipped on Carter Pass and she had sprained
her ankle so bad she could n't stand. Just at this junction,
the Friar had come along, and had put her up on his horse
and held her on with one arm about her, because the pain
in her ankle made her head light. On the way they came
smack up again' the kid, and he gave 'em a grin, and
gone on without askin' questions.

He went straight to Olaf, and told him that Kit had eloped
with the Friar. The Friar had brought her up to Shipley's,
they havin' been friends of his in Colorado. They had a
daughter livin' up in Billings, Montana ; and as soon as her
ankle could stand it. Kit was goin' up to live with the
daughter, she havin' three little children and a railroad hus-
band who was away from home more 'n half the time.

This was the whole o' the story; but you can easy see

KIT MURRAY

169

what a fine prospect it made for gossip, and also what a fine
time a young imp like Bud Fisher could have with a sober
feller like Olaf. Olaf would n't have just grounds for makin'
away with Bud for doin' nothin' except grin, so long as the
Friar remained alive with the girl in his keepin'. It was a
neat little mess; and from what we found out afterwards,
the kid was as irritatin' as a half-swallcred cockle-burr.

Big, siltiit fellers like Olaf are just like big, new boilers.
A little leaky boiler fizzes away all the time, but when it
comes to explode, it has n't anything on hand to explode
with; while a big, tight boiler, when it does go off, gen-
erally musses up the landscape consid'able ; and when Olaf
started to stampede he made more noise in a week'n Bud
Fisher had in his whole life.

When Kit had finished tellin' me the story, I shook hands
with her, and said that while she hadn't used the best
judgment the' was, she had probably used the best she' had;
and that it was more the men's fault than hers, so she could
count on me as far as I could travel. Then I went outside
while the Friar and ol' Mother Shipley fixed up her ankle.

They all seemed pleased about the way it was healin', and
after it was tied up. Kit stood on it and even took a few
steps. It twisted her face a time or two at first ; but after
she 'd gone across the room and back a few times, she said
it felt better *n it had for years. This made us all laugh,
'cause fact was, she had n't been housed in near up to the
average of a sprained ankle. The Friar allowed 'at she 'd
be fit to travel day after the next ; so it was planned to start
in the evenin', and for both of us to go with her. Then we
had an early supper an' started home.

On the way, I complained about the foolish way in which
Kit had acted, for the sole purpose of drawin' the Friar out

170

FRIAR TUCK

and gettin' his views on women. Nearly always when I got
him started, I was able to pick up some little sayin' which
furnished me with more thought-food than his blocked-out
sermons did.

" Of course Kit was foolish," he admitted ; " but what
show has she ever had? Her father never was fit to bring
her up ; and he did n't even do the best he could. A woman
has more vital strength than a man, because the future of
the race depends on her; but she also has more emotions,
so 'at the wear an' tear is greater. Man, on the other hand,
has more muscle 'n woman, and more brutality. Foolin'
man has been the best way a woman had to fight for a good
many centuries; and this was the way poor Kit tried to
fight. The plain, simple truth generally works best; but
it takes wisdom to see this, and wisdom is seldom anything
more than the dregs o' folly. The' was no one to teach Kit
wisdom; so she has had to strain off her own folly; but
she is a fine, brave girl, and I think she will profit by
experience."

Now this was a new thought to me, about wisdom bein'
nothin' but the dregs o' folly ; but it 's a good tough thought,
and I 've had a heap o' chewin' on it since then ; so I feel
repaid in havin' took sides again' Kit and lurin' the Friar
into heavin' it at me.

It was dark when we reached his twistin' path along the
ledge, and I stepped as cautious as a glow-worm in a powder-
mill; but as soon as we had our pipes an' the fire goin', I
wouldn't have swapped seats with the fattest king in the
universe.

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

TESTING THE FRIAR's NERVE

As soon as we had eaten breakfast next momin', the Friar
sez : " You, bein' one o' the earth animals, have never had
much chance to see a view. Yesterday your curiosity was
itchin' so 'at I doubt if you could have told a mountain peak
from a Mexican hat; but now that you have temporarily
suppressed your thirst foi gossip, had a good sleep, and a
better breakfast, drag yourself out to the front porch and
take a bird's-eye view of the world."

Well, it was worth it, it certainly was worth it ! What he
called the front porch, was the ledge after it had flipped itself
around the jutting; and when a feller stood on it, he felt
plenty enough like a bird to make it interestin'. The Big
Horns ran across the top o' the picture about a hundred an'
forty miles to the north, and gettin' all blended in with
the clouds. On the other t"/o sides were different mem-
bers of the Shoshone family, most o' which I knew by
sight from any angle; and down below was miles an'
miles of country spread out like a map, but more highly
color-d.

" Friar," I scz, " you 're a wealthy man."

This tickled him a lot, 'cause he was as proud o' that view
as if he 'd painted it. " I am, Happy," he said, " and I have
yielded to a wealthy man's temptations. Any one who comes
here will be welcome ; but I own up, I have kept this place
a secret to have it all to myself."

17* FRIAR TUCK

" A man like you needs some quiet place to consider in,"
sez I.

" Get thee behind me, Satan, get thee behind me," cried
the Friar. " I have been on far too friendly terms with that
excuse for many a long month. I'.ut I do enjoy this place;
so I am going to let you help me lay in my winter's supply of
wood, and then make you a joint member in full standing."

We packed wood along that spider thread of a path all
morning ; and finally I got so it did n't phazc mc any more 'n
it did him. He sang at his work most of the time, and I
joined in with him whenever I felt so moved, though it did
strike me 'at this was a funny way to keep a place secret ;
and my idee is that he sang to ease his conscience by showin'
it that he was n't sneakin' about his treasure.

I remember him mighty plain as he walked before me on
the ledge, totin' a big log on his shoulder, and singin' the
one 'at begins, " Hark, my soul ! It is the Lord ! " This was
onv^ he fair used to raise himself in, and it seemed as if we
two were climbin' right up on the air, plumb into the sky.
When he 'd let himself out this way, he 'd fill me so full of
a holy kind of devilment, that it would 'a' given me joy to
have leaped off the cliflf with him, and take chances on goin'
up or down.

We had about filled his wood place, and were goin' back
after the last load when just as he swung around a corner,
I saw his hand go up as though wamin' me to stop ; and I
froze in my tracks. He had n't been singin' this trip, for a
wonder; but the next moment I heard a sound which purt
nigh jarred me off. It was a low, deep growl which I in-
stantly recognized as belongin' to Olaf the Swede. Olaf
did n't talk with muc' brogue, though when he got excited
he had his own fashion for hitchin' words together.

" I intend to kill you," said Olaf, as calm as though talkin' about

a sick sheep
" It would be a foolish waste of time," replied the Friar, as if he

was advisin' a ten-year-old boy not to fish when the Hlue Bull

was high and muddy. " It wouldn't do any good, and I siiall

not allow it "

Std page 173

TESTING THE FRIAR'S NERVE 173

" Where is the girl? " he asked with quiet fierceness, and
for a space I was sorry my parents hadn't been eagles.
There wasn't room to fight out on that ledge, the Friar
didn't have a gun on, I couldn't possibly shoot around
him ; and Olaf was seven parts demon when he laid back his
ears and started to kick.

" Where she cannot be bothered," sez the Friar, full as
quiet but without any fierceness. The' was a little bush about
eight feet up, and I felt sure it would hide me, so I stuck my
fingers in the side o' the cliff and climbed up ; but the' was
no way for me to get out to the bush, and I had to drop back
to the ledge and stand there with the sweat tricklin' down
between my shoulders until I felt like yellin'.

" I intend to kill you," said Olaf, as calm as though talkin'
about a sick sheep.

" It would be a foolish waste of time," replied the Friar,
as if he was advisin' a ten-year-old boy not to fish when the
Blue Bull was high and muddy. " It would n't do any good,
and I shall not allow it."

I got out my gun, and made ready to do whatever the
angels suggested; but for some time the' was silence, and
durin* this time I was keyed up so tight my muscles began
to ache. I * ew they were lookin* into each other's eyes, and
I 'd have given a finger off each hand to see how the Friar's
steady gray eyes handled those queer blue ones of Olaf.

" Is she all right? " asked Olaf, and all the threat had left
his voice, and it had just a glint o' pleadin' in it. I would n't
have been one bit more surprised to have seen a prairie-dog
come flyin' up the gorge, blowin' a comet with his nose.

" She has sprained her ankle ; but aside from this has
no physical ill," sez the Friar. " You men have caused her
a lot of worry, and her soul is sick ; but her body is well."

174

FRIAR TUCK

After another silence, Olaf said slowly : " Yes, yes ; I
can tell by the light that you speak true. What do you in-
tend to do with her? "

" I intend to cure her," sez the Friar. " I intend to help
and strengthen her ; and I want you to help her, too. Olaf,
she has had a lot of trouble, and her wild gaiety is only a veil
to hide the wounds in her heart. I want you to help her."

*' I know, I know she is honest," said Olaf, and blamed if
his voice didn't sound like a new boy talkin' to the boss;
" but she made me love her. Yes, I do love her. I must
marry her. Yes, this is so."

" She cannot marry you, or any one else, now," sez the
Friar, kindly. " This is why she has gone from one man to
another — to disgust them all and make them leave her
alone."

" That is a damn devil of a way," cried Olaf in anger.
" Why should she go to dances, and out ridin', and so on, if
she wants men to leave her alone ? "

" She was foolish, she knows that now ; but her father
is not the right sort of a man, and her home was not pleas-
ant," said the Friar.

" I told him I kill him, if she marry any one but me," said
Olaf. "I know he is not honest; but he is afraid of me,
and he will not bother her now. I go to see him again
purty soon, and tell him some more. Won't you tell me
where she is ? "

" I want to be your friend, Olaf," said the Friar gently.
" I tell you honest that she cannot marry now. When I see
her again, I shall tell her of meetin' you, and what you have
said. I have no desire except to do the best for all of you,
and if you love her truly, all you will want will be to do that
which is best for her."

it'

TESTING THE FRIAR'S NERVE 175

The Friar paused, and I pulled my ear clear to the edge o'
the rock, so as not to miss a word. " Olaf ," he went on in
a low, sorrowful voice, " the love of a man for a woman is
a wonderful thing, a terrible thing, a soul-testing thing.
Don't let your love become common for men to talk over.
In believing what men have told you of me you have insulted
her, by admitting that such a thing is possible. Go back
to your work, kill no man for what he says of her; but
keep her pure in your own heart, and this will be the best
way to keep her pure before the world. Silence the gossips
by living above them ; and if it becomes necessary for you
to take your own love by the throat, then do it, and do it for
love of her. I shall do all I can to make her worthy of you."

You should have heard the Friar's voice wh^n he was
sayin' this. I stood on the little ledge, just breathin' enough
to keep my lungs ventilated, and lookin' out across the
landscape — mountains on all sides of me, and down below
the broken ground and the benches, with the green strips
along the cricks lookin' like lazy snakes in the hot sunshine.
I couldn't see a livin' creature, I felt like the last man on
earth; and that deep, musical voice seemed comin' to me
from somewhere out beyond the limits of life. I did n't have
any more fear now : the' was n't anything in the shape of a
human who could have done violence to the Friar after
hearin' him say the words I 'd just heard; so I put up my
gun, and listened again.

" Can't ya tell me why she can't marry me?" asked Olaf,
and the* was a tremble in his voice, almost as though it
flowed up from a sob.

" I think I can trust you to keep her secret," sez the Friar.
" She is married already. The man was a beast and de-
serted her; but he is still alive, and she cannot marry again."

176

FRIAR TUCK

I heard Olaf make a queer, animal sound with his breath,
and then he said : " Yes, you speak true — I can tell by the
light ; but she loves me — I can tell that also by the light.
Will you tell nie when she can marry?"

" I will," sez the Friar, and his voice was a pledge.
" There 's my hand on it."

They brought their hands together with a smack I could
hear, and then Olaf turned on the narrow ledge, with the
Friar holdin' him on, an' started off. The Friar went
along with him, and I sneaked after, keepin' a turn between
us. Olaf mounted his boss and rode away without lookin'
back, which, as a matter o' fact, was his way o* doin' things ;
and when he was out o' sight, I joined the Friar.

The' was still a look of sadness in the Friar's face ; but
back of it, and shinin' through it, was a quiet satisfaction.
He was full o' the scene he had just gone through; and
presently he turned an' said : " That was a glorious victory
he ga'ned over himself, Happy. That man has a good heart,
and who knows but what he will yet be the means of bringin'
me an' Tyrrel Jones together."

'• What do you reckon he meant by the light tellin' him
that you were an honest man ? " I asked. This was the most
curious part of the whole thing to me.

"How can I tell," he sez. "Life is so crowded with
wonders that I have nuit wonderin' about 'em ; but I always
feel a thrill when the stubborn spirit of a strong man

melt and run into the mold the Master has prepared for it."
" I '11 own it was about the weirdest thing I ever saw,"
sez I ; " but I 'm willin' to bet that whatever else Olaf's spirit
has molded itself into, it 's not a doormat with ' welcome '
wrote on it; as the first feller 'at fools with that girl is
likely to find out."

TESTING THE FRIAR'S NERVE 177

" Never doubt the power of the Lord, Happy," sez he.
" The hand that piled up these hills can easy shape even so
stubborn a thing as the human will."

" Yes," I agreed ; " but it generally takes just about the
same length of time to do it, and a man don't usually last
that long."

"Time!" sez he; "what do you know about time? It
may have taken ages to form these hills ; and then again, it
may have been done in the twinklin' of an eye. From the
way the streaks tilt up, I 'm inclined to think it was done
sudden."

I looked at the lines along the faces o' the hills, and I
was inclined to believe it, too; so I dropped that subject,
and we sat down close tc^ether and looked off down the
trail where Olaf had vanished.

We sat in silence a long time, me thinkin' o' what sort of
a light Olaf had seen to make him know 'at the Friar '""s
honest ; and of the way the Friar's voice had gone through
me when he had talked of love.

This was a new idee to me, and one o' the biggest I had
ever tried to grapple with. Before this, my notion o' love
was, for a man to get the girl any way he could; and it
took me some time to see the grandness of a man takin' his
own love by the throat for love of a woman. I knew 'at the
Friar had done this himself; but it never was clear to me
until I heard the heartache moanin' through his voice as he
laid out this law for Olaf, and Olaf bowed his stiff neck
and accepted it.

I 'm purty sure that if I 'd 'a' known that day, that a few
years later I would have to take my own love by the throat
for the sake of little Barbie, I would n't 'a' had the nerve
to go on playin' the game — but this is life. We pick up a

178 FRIAR TUjCK

stone here, and another there, and build them into our wall
until the flood comes ; and then if the wall is n't high enough
to turn back the flood, all the sting and bitterness comes
from knowin' that we haven't made use of all the stones
which came rollin' down to our feet.

That night we had an uncommon fine fire in the cave.
I used to enjoy these evenin' fires with the Friar, as much
as a dog likes to have his ears pulled by the hand he loves
best. He would tell me tales of all the ages 'at man has lived
on the face of the whole earth, and I 'd sit and smoke my
pipe, and make up what I 'd 'a' done, myself, if I 'd been
one o' these big fellers. These chummy little fire-talks
used to broaden me out and make me feel related to the
whole human race, and it was then 'at I came to know the
Friar best — though the' ain't no way to put this into a
story.

Along about nine o'clock the Friar began to lecture me
again' the use o' violence, pointin' out that war nor gun-
fightin' nor any other sort o' violence had ever done any
good; and endin' up with the way he had handled Olaf
as illu .atin' how much better effects spiritual methods
had.

" Humph," sez I, " so you 're tryin' to put that over as
an ordinary case, are ya? Did you ever before see such
eyes in a man's nci.d as what Olaf has ? "

" Now that you mention it," sez he, " I did notice they
v>cre peculiar."

" I ruhly believe you 're right," sez I, sarcastic. " When
he said he saw light he was n't speakin' in parables. He can
see things 'at you nor I can't see — though I doubt if he
understands 'em himself."

" Still, violence would have spoiled everything," persisted

TESTING THE FRIAR'S NERVE

179

huii:

bronco when you tried

the Friar, who was
to make him back up.

" Now, don't forget anything," sez I. " It was n't my face
'at lit up when I said 'at he did his killin' with bare hands ;
nor it wasn't me who gloated over this as fumishin' an
excuse to use my bare hands in defendin' myself."

" Oh, Happy, Happy," sez he, with one o' the bursts 'at
made ya willin' to go through fire and water for him. " I 'm
the entire human race : there is n't a single sin or weakness
which has n't betrayed me at one time or another, and yet the
wicked pride of me persists in stickin' up its head an' crowin'
every time I take my eyes off it."

" Well, I like your pride full as well as any other part o'
ya," sez I ; " and before you wrangle it into its corral again,
I want to say 'at no other man in the world could 'a' told
Olaf what you told him this mornin', and lived to talk it
over around this fire to-night — unless, he had used the best
and the quickest brand o' violence the' is, in the meantime."

" Now, that you have succeeded in flatterin' both of us,
we'll go to sleep," sez the Friar, and the' was a deep
twinkle in his eyes which alius rejoiced me to call up.

Next night soon after dark, we started out with Kit
Murray. She rode like a man and could tick out her fifty or
sixty a day right along, without worryin' her pony. As soon
as she was safe located in Billings, I turned back to the Dot,
while the Friar rounded up some stray sheep he had near
the border, and as far as I can recall we did n't meet again
all that summer.

CHAPTER NINETEEN

OTHER PEOPLES BUSINESS

Olaf's theories concernin' violence didn't harmonize com-
plete with the Friar's ; but his method for discouragin' scan-
dal was thorough to a degree. He silenced the gossipers all
right, though so far as I heard, most of 'em recovered ; and
the outcome was 'at the Friar stood higher after the scan-
dal 'n he had before.

The Cross brand outfit was a good deal like a pack o'
dogs: they each sought Ty Jones's favor, and they were
all jealous of each other. Olaf stood high on account of his
mysterious insight; so Badger-face, the foreman, backed
up Bud Fisher to devil Olaf as far as possible without givin'
Olaf what Ty would judge a fit excuse for unscrewin' the
kid's neck; and from the talk I heard, their outfit trotted
along as smooth an' friendly as seven ' e bears hitched to a
freight wagon ; but our trails did n't cross frequent, so it was
all hearsay.

The winter before had been so fierce 'at a lot o' small
outfits could n't winter through their stock. Towards spring,
ol' Cast Steel had bought in the Half Moon brand for a
hundred an' fifty dollars; and that summer me an' Spider
Kelley put in our spare time huntin' strays. Spider had
come back, flat broke and full o' repentance ; so aiter I 'd
stood him on his head in a I f!alo-wallow full o' mud, I
forgave him free and frank, and this summer we rode to-
gether most o' the time.

OTHER PEOPLE'S BUSINESS i8i

or Cast Steel was as lucky as a hump-back cat, and this
summer the grass was fatter 'n ever I 'd seen it. We
rounded up over five hundred head o' ponies, and over sixty
cows, which was just like bein' caught out in a gold storm
without your slicker on ; so we did n't sympathize any with
the old man, but prospected around for pleasure whenever
we felt like it.

One afternoon after the fall round-up, me an' Spider
found ourselves in a mighty rough bit o' country on the
north slope o' the Wind River range. We had been herdin'
six or eight Half Moon ponies before us for several days,
devilin' a parcel of Injuns into thinkin' 'at we was out
tradin* ; but we had got weary o' this, an' were just foolin'
around and wishin' 'at somethin' would turn up to amuse us.
" Aw, let 's go on back home." sez Spider, not knowin'
he was speakin' wisdom. " I 'd sooner work at work than
work at huntin' up somethin' to amuse myself with."

" Well," I sez, " we '11 finish out this afternoon, an' then
if nothin' turns up, we '11 go back, draw our pay an' go into
Boggs."

We saw our ponies start around a butte ahead of us an'

stop to examine somethin'. We followed 'em around the

butte, and there below us on a little level, was a bunch of

men — seven of 'em. We drew up an' gave 'em a look-over.

" What do you make out? " sez I.

" Olaf the Swede with a rope around his neck, an' Bad-
ger-face Flannigan holdin' the other end o' the rope," sez
Spider. "What do you reckon they're goin' to do to
him?"

" Comb his hair, or fit a new sun-bonnet on him," sez I,
sarcastic. " What else do they put a man's neck in a noose
for? Let 's go down an' see what happens."

I li

182 FRIAR TUCK

" A feller 's not sure of a welcome at such times," sez
Spider.

" No," I agreed ; " but I want to see Olaf 's eyes again,
and this may be my last chance."

" It may be your last chance to see anything," sez Spider.
" The best thing we can do is just to back-track. We in-
terrupted 'em once before ; and I don't want 'em to get the
idee that we spend all our time doggin' their footsteps for
a chance to spoil their fun. This ain't any of our business."

" We won't spoil their fun," sez I. " If they get suspi-
cious, we can take a hand in it, an' that will fix it all right.
Olaf ain't nothin' to us; and I don't intend to risk my fat
for him, just 'cause he 's got curious eyes."

" No, I 'm not goin'," sez Spider.

I looked across at the group again, an' there comin' up the
trail behind 'em was Friar Tuck, ridin' a round little pinto,
an' leadin' a big bay.

" Well, you just stay here, an' be damned to you," sez I to
Spider. *' I 'm goin' on down." So me an' Spider rode
down together, an' arrived at just the same time as the Friar
did.

Badger-face looked first at us, an' then at the Friar.
" What the hell do you fellers want this time ? " he sez to us
in welcome.

" W^e just happened along," sez I. " What 's goin' on? "

" You 're goin' on yourselves, first thing," sez Badger-
face. " That 's what 's goin' on."

" I guess 'at you ain't got neither deeds nor lease to this
land," sez I. " We have n't any intention of interferin' with
you; but we don't intend to be sent where we don't want
to go. We 've got business here, huntin* up stray bosses,
an' I reckon we'll just stick around."

OTHER PEOPLE'S BUSINESS 183

"You got business here, too, I suppose?" sez Badger-
face, turnin' to the Friar.

" Yes," sez the Friar calmly. " I came here entirely by
accident; but now it is my business to inquire into why
you have a rope about this man's neck. You recall havin*
put me into a similar perdicament, Mr. Flannigan."

" Yes, an' the only thing I regret is, that I was inter-
rupted," growls Badger-face. " But this time, the' ain't any
chance to change the programme, so you might just as
well poke on into some one else's affairs."

"What's the matter, Olaf?" asked the Friar,

Before Olaf could reply. Badger-face gave a jerk on the
rope. " You shut up," sez he.

" Surely you will give the man a chance to speak," cried
the Friar, indignant.

'^It won't do him no good to speak," sez Badger-faT
" He 's committed a murder,, but of course he denies
Now, get out o' here, all three of ya."

" Listen," sez the Friar, as steady an' strong as the sweep
of a deep river, " I care more for justice 'n I do for law.
I know that hangin' a man has never done any good; but
it is usually regarded as a legal form of punishment, and
the prejudice in its favor is still too strong for one man
to overcome. If you convince me that this man would be
hung by a court, why, I shall never say a word about it ;
but if you do not convince me, I shall stir up all the trouble
I can. I have quite a number of friends, Mr. Flannigan."

Badger-face studied over this a moment; and he saw it
had sense. " All right," sez he, " we '11 try him fair an'
square; and then you three will have to help string him,
an' I guess that '11 keep your mouths shut."

Tell

your story, Olaf," sez the Friar.

IIP

,84 FRIAR TUCK

" Well," «ez Olaf, " we came up short on the round-up,
an" the old man raised Cain about it, an' sent us out to hunt
for strays. Badger-face split us into pairs, an' made me
an' Bud Fisher work together. We saw some cows up
on a ledge where we could n't ride to; so we left the hosses
below, an' climbed to see if they had our brand. If they
had, we intended to ride around and get 'em. If not it
would save half a day. Bud Fisher had a rifle along, hopin'
to get a mountain sheep, an' he insisted on takin' it with
him. He climbed up on a ledge, an' I passed up the rifle
to him. It was a long stretch, an' I passed it muzzle first.
The hammer caught on a point of rock, an' shot him
through the stomach. I did n't bear him any ill will any
more — I ran down to the hosses, an' brought up the saddle-
blankets an' the slickers, an' made him as comfortable as
I could. Then I hunted up Badger-face an' told him. When
we got back he was dead. This is the truth."
" I think it is," sez the Friar.

" Aw rol ! " sez Badger-face. " Come on, now, an' finish
it. Every one knows how they hated each other ; and it 's
plain enough that when the Swede here got the chance, he
just put Bud out o' the way, an' Bud was one o' the finest
boys the' ever was in the world — always full o* fun an*
frolic ; while Olaf has alius been sour an' gloomy."

Most men are as sappy as green grain, an' they bow which-
ever way the wind blows. The Cross brand punchers all
looked extremely sad when Badger-face spoke o' what a
royal good feller Bud Fisher had been, an' when he stopped,
they all glared at Olaf as friendly as wolves, especially a
skinny feller by the name of Dixon, who had the neck and
disposition of a snake.

"If you thought 'at Olaf an' Fisher hated each other.

OTHER PEOPLE'S BUSINESS 185

why did you make 'em work together?" atked the Friar;
and the Cross brand punchers pricked up their ears an'
looked pointedly at Badger-face.

" I thought they had made it up," sez Badger-face, sur-
prised into takin' the defensive.

" I have noticed that you are likely to jump hasty at con-
clusions," sez the Friar, speakin' with tantalizin* slowness.
He was a fisher of men, all right, the Friar was ; and just
then he was fishin' for those Cross brand punchers. " Did
Bud speak before he died, Olaf?" he asked impartially.

Olaf hung his head : " All he said was, that she had n't
never cared for him, an' that he did n't know one thing again'
her," said Olaf.

" Aw, what 's the use c' stringin* it out," sez Badger-face.
" Let 's hang him and h» . it over with."

" Hanging a fellow-bein' is a serious matter, Mr. Flanni-
gan," sez the Friar. " I am a party to this now, and shall
have to assume my share of the responsibility. I shall never
consent to swingin' a man on such evidence as this. Let us
go and examine the spot. The hammer may have left a
scratch, or something. H you convince me that Olaf com-
mitted the murder, I pledge to assist in hangin' him. That 's
certainly fair, mei:," he sez to the Cross-branders, an' they
nodded their heads that it was.

So we dumb up to the spot where Olaf claimed to have
handed the gun ; but the' was n't any scratch on the rock.
"Did he fall from the ledge when he was shot?" asked
the Friar.

" No," sez one o* the punchers. " He fell on the edge
an' hung on."

" Did the bullet go clean through him? " asked the Friar.
" Yes, it went clear through," sez the feller.

i86

FRIAR TUCK

" Point with your finger just where it went in, an' just
where it came out," sez the Friar.

The feller pointed with one finger in front, an' one be-
hind. The Friar took a rope an' had me hold it behind the
feller at just the level of that finger an' then he made Spider
stretch the rope so that it passed on a line with the finger
in front. The whole crowd was interested by this time.
" Now, then," sez the Friar, " where could Olaf have stood
to shoot such a line as that. He could not have shot while
he was climbin' up, nor he couldn't have reached high
enough while standin' below."

" He could, too," sez Badger-face, " for Bud would have
been leanin' over, reachin' for the gun."

" If he had been shot while he was reachin' over, he
would have fallen from the ledge," flashed the Friar.

" Maybe he did," snapped Badger-face, just as quick.
" Olaf here is as strong as a horse, an' maybe he put him
back on the ledge. He had blood on his hands an' you can
still see it on his shirt. A man don't bleed much when shot

in the belly."

Olaf's queer blue eyes turned from one to the other, but
his face did n't change expression much. He had about give
up hope in the first place, an' his face had the look of a
boss, after he's been throwed four or five times an' just
keels over on his side an' sez to himself : " Well, they 've
put the kibosh on me, an' I don't intend to make a fool of
myself any more by tryin' to break loose." The rest of
us was more excited about it than Olaf was himself.

"Which one of us is the nearest size to Bud Fisher?"
asked the Friar.

They all agreed that Spider Kelley was ; so the Friar had
him coon up on the ledge. Then he had Olaf take the empty

OTHER PEOPLE'S BUSINESS 187

rifle just as he had held it when he passed it up ; but made
him give it to Badger-face himself o pass up. Badger-
face passed it up, Spider Kelley reached for it, took it, and
started to straighten up — The hammer caught on the
precise knob that Olaf had said it had, an' snapped hard
enough to set off a catridge. " There," sez the Friar,
sweepin' his hands wide. We could all see that the bullet
would 'a' gone through just where it did go.

" Hand back the rifle, an' I '11 show ya how he passed it
up," said Badger-face. Spider passed it down, an' we all
walched intent. It had become like a real court o' law ; we
had forgot what the case was about, we was so interested
in seein' the scrap the lawyers were puttin' up.

Badger-face cocked the rifle so slick we did n't see him,
called out to Spider to catch it, an' tossed it up to him. It
came just short o' Spider's hand; and without thinkin' o'
what he was doin', Spider reached for the gun. This brought
him squattin' just the time the gun dropped back into
Badger's hands, and quick as a wink, he pulled the trigger —
and hanged if that bullet would n't have traveled through the
same hole the first one had made.

I never saw circumstantial evidence give such a work-out
before. If we had all been fair-minded, it would have puz-
zled us; but as it was, we sided accordin' to our prejudices;
an' the Cross brand fellers cnose Badger- face to Olaf, Bad-
ger-face bein' foreman. The Friar saw he was stumped.

" Are there any marks up there ? " he asked of Spider.

" There 's some blood streaks on a stone," sez Spider.

" Did you notice 'em ? " asked the Friar of Badger- face.

" Yes," sez he ; " but they don't mean nothin'."

" Let 's go up an' look at 'em," sez the Friar, so we all
dumb up.

I-.

1 1,

i88

FRIAR TUCK

They pointed out just where Bud Fisher had laid when
they found him; and close beside him was a smooth
white stone with blood marks on it. The Friar examined
the lay o' the ledge; but it didn't tell nothin', so finally
he got down on his knees an' studied the blood-stained

stone.

Presently he nodded his head and straightened up. " Ex-
amine that stone," he said, pointin' with his fingers. We all
crowded about an' studied it. The' was finger an' thumb
prints all over it ; but if you looked close, you could make
out the rude image of a man puUin' up a gun which had ex-
ploded on the edge of a ledge. It was a smudgey, shakey
affair, but if ya looked just right you could make it out. Yet,
even this did n't floor Badger-face.

" The Swede there did that himself," he growled ; " and
this makes him out sneakier 'n we thought him. Let 's hang
him, and get rid o' this foolishness."

" Flannigan," sez the Friar in cold, hard tones, " you have
gone too far this time. If you had hung Olaf at first, you
might have done it from a proverted sense o' justice ; but
to do it now would be murder ; and your own men would n't
help. Do any'^of you men chew tobacco? "

If he had asked for a can o' face-paint, we would n't 'a'
been more surprised; but to show the hold the Friar had
gained over that crowd, every feller there but Badger-face
held out his plug to him.

" Make some tobacco juice, Olaf," he said.
Olaf bit off a hunk the size of a walnut from his own
piece, an' proceeded to make juice, as though his life de-
pended upon the amount of it. "Wet your thumb and
fingers with it, and make marks on the white stone," com-
manded the Friar.

OTHER PEOPLE'S BUSINESS 189

Olaf did so; and when we saw the difference in size and
shape, we savvied the game.

" Olaf took Bud's hand and made the marks with Bud's
own blood," sez Badger-face.

" Did any one here ever try to handle a dead man's hand ? "
asked the Friar; and that settled it. We all nodded our
heads, except Badger-face, an' he had sense enough to see
'at he had lost the deal, so he did n't say nothin*.

" What I can't see is, why he did n't write," sez the
Friar.

" He could n't write," chirps up two punchers at once, an'
the they took the rope off Olaf's neck.

They talked it over and decided that the best thing to do
was to bury Bud Fisher right there in the canon, iuj was
a little cave on the ledge back o' where we were standin'
so two o' the punchers went down where they had him laid
out under the slickers, an' brought him up. W had to
hoist him on ropes, an' the Friar looked a long time into
his face.

It was just a lad's face: not bad nor hardened; just the
face of a mischievous boy, weary after a day's sport. We
all took a look, an' then put him in the little cave an' heaped
clods over him an' piled stones on until the door was blocked
shut again' varmints.

The Friar sat down on a big rock — he had work»d is
hard as any of us — and sat thinkin' with his chin in his
hand. The Cross brand fellers muttered among themselves
for a moment, an' then one of 'em took off his hat, an' sez,
" Don't ya think ya 'd ought to speak somethin' over him,
parson?"

"Do you want me to?" asked the Friar. And they all
nodded their heads.

■
I

in.-
M

190 FRIAR TUCK

So the Friar, he took off his battered hat and stood up
before us an' spoke a sermon, while we took off our hats,
an' sat around on stones to listen.

I 'm convinced 'at the Friar's long suit lay in the fact 'at
he alius preached at himself. Most preachers have already
divided the sheep from the goats; 'and they alius herd off
contented with the sheep on green pastures, and preach down
at the goats on the barren rocks; but if the Friar made any
division at all, he classed himself in with the goats.

You see, in agreein' to help string Olaf should he be con-
victed, the Friar had bet his soul on the outcome ; and this
braced him up in that crowd as nothin' else would; for they
knew that if he had lost, he 'd have pulled harder on the
rope 'n any one else.

It 's child's play to put out a funeral talk over some old
lady who has helped the neighbors for seventy or eighty
years; but to preach the need of repentance to the livin',
and then to smooth things out for 'em after they 've died
in their sins, in such a way as it will jolly up the survivors
and give 'em nerve to carve cheerful tidings on the tomb-
stone, is enough to make a discriminatin' man sweat his heir

out.

The Friar stood with his hands clasped in front of him,
and his eyes fixed sort o' dreamy-like on the distance. It was
a perfect day, one o' those days 'at can't happen anywhere
except in our mountains in the fall o' the year, and my
mind drifted off to some lines the Friar was fond of re-
hearsin', " Where every prospect pleases, an' only man is
vile." Then I saw a change come to the Friar's face, and
he began to chant the one which begins : " Lord, let me
know mine end, and the number of my days."

He chanted slow, and the words did n't mean much to us ;

OTHER PEOPLE'S BUSINESS 191

but the solemn voice of him dragged across our hearts like
a chain. One line of it has haunted me ever since. It seems
to suggest a hundred thoughts which I can't quite lay my
hand on, and every time I get sad or discouraged, it begins
to boom inside me until I see 'at my lot ain't so much differ-
ent from the rest ; and I buck up and get back in the game
again : " For I am a stranger with Thee and a sojourner as
all my fathers were."

The Friar did n't preach us a long talk, and most of it
circled about his favorite text, that a man's real children
were those who inherited his character, rather than those
who inherited his blood. Once he raised his finger and
pointed it at us and sez : " You were fond o' this boy ; but
did you love him for his good, or did you love him for your
own selfishness? I knew him not save through the dark
glass of reputation ; yet after looking into his dead features,
to-day, I think I know him well. Death tells, sometimes,
what Life has hid away. I did not see in his face the hard,
deep lines of stealthy sin; I saw the open face of a child,
tired out after a day wasted in thoughtless and impulsive
play; but comin' home at nightfall to have his small cares
rubbed away by a lovin' hand — and then, to fall asleep."

O' course, the Friar landed on us good and plenty; but
this was the part of his talk which stuck to us after the
scoldin' part was all forgotten. When he was through he
said a short prayer, and sang in a low tone the one be-
ginnin', " One sweetly solemn thought." His eyes were
^listenin' through a mist when he finished this, and he
climbed down from the ledge, hurried over to his pinto, and
rode off without sayin' another word.

We all sat silent for quite a spell, and then Spider and
I got up and nodded good day to 'em. The Cross-branders

192 FRIAR TUCK

also got up and shook 'emselves, and started down with us
— all except Olaf. He sat there on a stone with his fingers
run into his hair, and his face hid in his hands. Olaf had
had regular religion when he was a child; and it had come
back to him up there on the ledge. They say it 's worse 'n
a relapse o' the typhoid fever when it hits ya that way.
I know this much, Olaf was doubled up worse 'n if he 'd had
the colic; and from that time on, the Ty Jones outfit looked
mighty worldly to him.

Even Spider Kelley was savin' of his nonsense until we
got in sight of the Diamond Dot again.

ii'i

J 1
ill

CHAPTER TWENTY

QUARRELING FOR PEACE

We had a visitor once, which was a business man. One of
his chief diversities was to compare sedantary occupations
with what he called the joyous, carefree outdoor life. He
said 'at sedantary came from sedan-chair, and meant to sit
down at your work. I rode the range next spring until I
felt more sedantary 'n an engineer ; and sometimes at night
it used to strain my intellect to split the difference between
myself an' my saddle.

I got out o' humor an' depressed and downright gloomy.
Fact is, I was on the point o' rollin' up my spare socks and
givin' Jabez a chance to save my board money, when I
heard a sound 'at jerked me up through the scum and gave
me a glimpse o' the sky again. I was ridin' in about dusk,
and I had hung back o' the dust the other fellers had kicked
up, so I could be alone and enjoy my misery, when I
heard this inspirin' noise.

or Tank Williams once tried to learn to play on a split
clarinet a feller had give him, and at first I thought he had
found where we had buried it, and had resumed his musical
studies; but this outrage came from an instrument a feller
has to be mighty cautious about buryin'. It was a human
voice, and these were the words it was screechin' :

"Fair Hera caught her wayward ^[wuse
With a mortal maid one dawn.
Zeus charmed the maid into a cow.
To save himself a jaw'n'.

194

FRIAR TUCK

■ f-

This seemed to me a liber-tee

To take with poor I-oh;
But now I find that he was kind, —

'T was I who did not know.
For girls use flang and girls chew gum,

And drape their forms in silk;
While cows behave with de-co-rum,

And furnish us with milk."

Well, I gave a whoop and threw the spurs into my pony.
This was the seventy-ninth verse of Horace's song, and it
was his favorite, because it was founded on the Greek reli-
gion. I found him perched up behind a rock, and he kept
on slammin' chunks of his song up again' the welkin until
I shot some dirt loose above his head ; and then he climbed
down and reunioned with me.

He was lookin' fine, except that some of his waist prod-
ucts had come back, and we talked into each other until
the air got too thin to breathe. Then we suppered up and
began talkin' again. He had tried all sorts of gymnastical
gamco back East, from playin' golf to ridin' hossback in a
park, but it did n't have the right tang. Folks thought he 'd
gone insane an' lost his mind, the air did n't taste right, he
got particular about how his vittles were cooked; until
finally, his endurance melted and began to run down the
back of his neck. This decided him 'at he'd had full as
much East as was good for him ; so he loaded up a box with
firearms, tossed some clothin' into a handbag, and he said
his grin had been gettin' wider all the way out until it had
hooked holes through the window lights on both sides o'
the train.

We were all glad to see him, an' he dove into ranch life
like a bullfrog into a cream jar; and he got toughened to
a hard saddle in a mighty short time for a feller \\ho had
got used to upholstery back East. He said 'at the only

QUARRELING FOR PEACE 195

thing 'at had kept life in him had been to sing his song
constant; but he denied 'at this was his main excuse for
fleein' from his own range.

He didn't seem to bear a mite o' malice for the joke I
had put up on him ; but still, I have to own up 'at he half
pestered the life out of me with his song. He had what
he called a tenor voice; but it was the dole fullest thing I
ever heard, and the more he sang, the more his notes stuck
to him until I coveted to hear a love-sick hound serenadin'
the moon. When he saw it was riskin' his life to drag out
any more o' the song, he would pause temptingly, and then
begin a lecture on the Greek religion. He got me all mussed
up in religion.

Of course, I knew 'at the Injuns had a lot o' sinful reli-
gious idees, and I was prepared to give the other heathens
plenty o* room to swing in; but not even an Injun would
'a' stood for as immoral a lot as the Greek gods an' goddusses
— especially the top one, which Horace called Zeus an' Jove
an' Jupiter.

This one did n't have as much decency as a male goat, and
yet he had unlimited power. He was alius enticin' some
weak-minded human woman into a scrape; and when h«s
wife, who was called Hera and Juno, would get onto his
tricks, Zeus would snap his fingers, say " Flip ! " and charm
the human wom^n into some sort of an animal. It was a
handy scheme for him, true enough ; and he did n't care a
scene how embarrassin' it was for the humc^ women.

He turned one of 'em into a bear, and, like most other
women, she was feared o' bears an' wolves an' snakes, an'
the rest o' the company she was forced to associate with.
She led a perfectly rotten existence until her own son went
bear huntin', and was just on the point of jabbin' a spear

196 FRIAR TUCK

into her, when even Zeus himself admitted 'at this would
be carryin' the joke a leetle too far ; so he grabs 'em up and
sticks 'em into the sky as a group o' stars.

Horace tried to argue 'at this proved Zeus to be merciful ;
but as far as I can see it 's as idiotic as havin' the law hang
a man for murder. Supposin' some feller had murdered
me — would I feel any happier because this feller who
could n't put up with me in this world, is sent over to pester
me in the next? Course I wouldn't; but if one o' my
friends was murdered, and I had a chance to slay the feller
'at did it, this would give me a lot o' satisfaction an' joy an'
pleasure — though I don't say it would be just.

Puttin* the woman an' her son up in the sky did n't square
things in Horace's religion, neither ; 'cause he said 'at Hera
got jealous of Zeus for elevatin' the woman and she went
to her foster parents who had charge of the ocean, and made
'em bar this woman and her son from ever goin' into it, the
same as the other stars did, and he could prove it any clear
night. I told him that he might get away with such a tale
as that back East among the indoor people; but that he
could n't fool a day-old child with it out our way.

We started this discussion the day after the fall round-
up was over, Horace had toughened up before it began, and
he had rode with me all through it, and takin' it all in all
he was more help than bother, except that he shot too much.
When he had come out before, he had been so blame harm-
less he could n't have shot an innocent bystander ; but this
trip, he was blazin' away at every livin' thing 'at did n't have
a dollar mark on it, and when these wasn't offered, he'd
waste ammunition on a mark.

I had some details to tend to after the round-up, so we
didn't get a chance to settle the bet for several days. It

QUARRELING FOR PEACE 197
was only a dollar bet ; but when the time came, I picked
out a couple o' good bosses, bein' minded to look at the
stars from the top o' Cat Head.

We reached it about dark, made some coflFce, an' fried
some bacon. Then we smoked an' talked until it was entirely
dark before we ever looked up at the stars. " Now, bluffer,"
sez I, " show me your woman-bear."

He looked up at the sky, an' then moved on out o' the fire-
light, an' continued to look at the stars without speakin'.
"Don't seem to see 'em, do you?" I taunted.

He turned to me an' spoke in a hushed voice: "Man,"
he said, " this is wonderful. Why, the way those stars seem
to be hangin' down from that velvet dome is simply awe-
inspirin'. I 've looked through three good telescopes, but
to-night; I seem to be viewin' the heavens for the first time."
" I thought you was n't much familiar with 'em, or you
would n't have put out that nonsense about a bear-woman,"

I sez.
" That," sez he, pointin' to the best known group o' stars

in the sky, " is Ursa Major."

" That," sez I, " is the Big Dipper, an' you need n't try
to fool me by givin' it one o' your Greek names."

He did n't argue with me ; but came back to the fire an*
fixed some stones in the shape of the Big Dipper stars, then
drew lines with a stick, an' sez 'at this maue up the Great
Bear. I looked him between the eyes, but he held his face,
so I knew he was in earnest. ' AH right," I sez. " I 'U take
you huntin' some o' these days, an' if we chance to come
across a silver-tip — a real grizzly, understand, and not a
pet varmint backed up again' the risin' sun — you '11 change
your mind about what a bear looks like. If that was all
your fool Greeks knew about wild animals, I would n't waste

[' t

198

FRIAR TUCK

my time to hear what they had to say about god« an' god-
dusses. I 'm goin' to start back, an' you can come or not,
just as you please." This was the first time I had hinted
about the woodchuck ; but I was disgusted at his nonsense.
He took it all right, though, which proves he was game.

I rode some comin' back, an* he kept tryin' to square him-
self ; but I did n't heed him. Just before we reached the
foothills, we saw a fire, an' when we reached it, & Jriar
was just finishin' his supper. He an' Horace bowed stiffly
to each other, an' I was just put out enough by Horace's
star-nonsense to feel like roastin' some one; so I decided
to roast 'em both.

I sat on my boss an' looked scornful from one to the other.
" Here is two religious folks," I said, impersonal to the pony,
but loud enough for all to hear. " Here is two genuwine
religious folks ! One of 'em is workin' for universal brother-
hood, an' the other is peddlin' Greek religion which he claims
to be founded on beauty an' love an' harmony. They meet
in the mountains, an' bow as cordial as a snow-slif'e. T think
if ever I pick out a religion for myself, I '11 choose the
Injun's."

I could n't have asked for any two people to look more
foolish 'n they did. Neither one of 'em seemed to have any-
thing to say ; so I said to my pony : " Don't you worry none.
Muggins, I got a match o' my own, an' if we want to set
bv a fire, why, we can ride on to some place where wood is
free, an' build us one."

" Will you not dismount an' rest a while at my fire ? " sez
the Friar, in a tone meant as a slap at me.

" No, thank you," sez Horace, " wc must be goin'."

" Yes, Friar," I sez hearty. " Me an' Horace has a bet
up, an' you can decide it. Also, you owe him somethin' on

QUARRELING FOR PEACE 199

his own hook. You drove him out o' your religion an' into
the Greek religion ; an* if that don't give him a direct call
on you, why then you don't realize what a pest the Greek

religion is."

They were so embarassed they were awkward an' splut-
tery; but I was sure 'at this was good for 'em, so I got
off, threw the reins on the ground, an' warmed my hands at
the fire ; while Horace apologized for me not knowin' any
better, an' the Friar assured him coldly that everything was
all right, an' he was rejoiced to have a little company.

Well, for as much as ten minutes, we sat around en joy in'
what I once heard a feller call frapayed convivuality, an'
then I took pity on 'em an' loosened things up by tellin' the
Friar about the trip me an' Tank an' Horace had took into
the mountains to pacify our nerves, just before he had
stumbled on Horace that other time. O* course I didn't
tell it all, as I did n't want Horace to know any more about
it than he knew already ; but I told what a seedy little wind-
fall Horace had been when we started out, an' how he had
come back crackin' jokes an' sii'.gin' the infernalest song 'at
ever was made up. I finally got Horace to sing ten or
fifteen minutes o' this song, an' he droned it out so unusual
doleful that he fetched a chuckle out o' the Friar, an' then
we were feelin' easy an* comfortable, like outdoor men
again.

Then I told the Friar what our bet was, expectin' o' course
that he 'd back me up ; but what did he do but say 'at Horace
was right as far as the stars was concerned. This tickled
Horace a lot, an' he began to crow over me until I concluded
to test the Friar ; so I sez to Horace that his religion havin'
been endorsed by the Friar himself, I 'd become a Greek
the first chance I had.

vi
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h ;S

S :

li I

!ll

200 FRIAR TUCK

Horace didn't take any trouble to hide his satisfaction,
an' he began to expound upon the beauty, an' the art, an' the
freedom of the Greek religion at a g^eat rate.

"They certainly was free," I sez, "an' easy too, an' I
don't deny 'at they might 'a' been some weight in art an'
beauty ; but, confound 'em, they did n't know as much about
bears as I know about e-lectricity. I 'd just like to r
Zeus himself go up into the Tetons in the early spring, to
hunt for Big Dippers. I "11 bet the first hungry grizzly he 'd
come across would set him right on the bear question,"

This was a good opener, an' in about two shakes, the Friar
an' Horace had locked horns. Horace was a crafty, sar-
castic, cold-blooded little argufier; while the Friar was
warm an' eager an' open as the day. It was one o' the best
gabbin' matches I have ever started.

They dealt mostly in names I had never heard of before,
although once in a while they 'd turn up one a little familiar
on account of Horace havin' told me some tale of it. The
Friar knew as much about these things as Horace did;
but he called 'em myths, an' said while they didn't mean
anything when took literal, they had great historical value
when regarded merely as symbols. He said that I-oh —
the human maid which Zeus had turned into a cow — was
nothin' but the moon, an' that Argus of the hundred eyes
was simply the sky full o' stars ; and that the old god which
ate up his children was nothin' but time.

I didn't really understand much of what they said; but
I did enjoy watchin' 'em bandy those big words about. We
all use a lot o' words we don't understand; but as long as
they sound well an' fill out a gap it don't much matter.
These two, though, seemed to understand all the words they
Vised, an' I was highly edified.

QUAR'' Li h'G for PEACE 201

As they talked, an i kept watchin' the Friar's face, I
learned somethin' : the Friar had been mighty lonesome with
only us rough fellers to talk with, an' had been hungerin'
for just such a confab a- this to loosen up his subsoil a
little.

Every now an' ag .'n, I'd cast .'.n eye up to the stars;
an' while I didn't knew tiie religi us names of 'em, I knew
how to tell time by 'em; an' 1 Knew 'at those two would
have a turn when they remembered to look at their watches.
It was full one o'clock when the conversation came to its
first rest, an' then the Friar recalled what I had said when
I had dismounted; so he up an' asked Horace point-
blank what he had had to do with makin' Horace quit the
church.

Horace was minded to sidestep this at first by intimatin'
that I was not responsible for what I said; but he finally
came across and told the Friar that he had give up that
church for about the same reason that the Friar himself
had. This set the Friar back purty well on his haunches,
an' put him on the defensive. He had hammered Horace
freely before, but now when he conscientiously tried to
defend the gang he had left, and also excuse himself for
leavin', he had some job on his hands.

I thought Horace had him when he compared the Golden
Age of Greece an' Plato's Republic with the Dark Ages,
which was a stretch of years when the Christian religion
about had its own way ; but the Friar admitted that what
he called economical interests had put a smirch on the church
durin' the Dark Ages, an' then he sailed into the Golden
Age of Greece, showin' that slavery was the lot of most o'
the decent people durin' that period. When I fell asleep,
they were shakin' their fists friendly at one another, about

202 FRIAR TUCK

Plato's Republic, which I found out afterwards was only
a made-up story.

Bein' edicated is a good deal like bein' a good shot in a
quiet community — once in a long while it 's mighty com-
fortin', but for the most part it 's tiothin' but shootin' at a
target.

•J ■'■■

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

PEACE TO START A QUARREL

It was broad day when I woke up — that is, the sun was
beginnin' to rise — an' the fire had dwindled to coals, the
breeze had begun to stir itself, an' I was consid'able chilly.
I saw the Friar's nose stickin' out o' one side of his tarp an'
Horace's nose stickin' out the other, an' I grinned purty
contentedly.

My experience is, that quarrelsome people usually get
along well together an' make good company ; but sad, seri-
ous, silent, polite folks is about the wearin'est sort of an
affliction a body can have about.

I once heard a missionary preach about what a noble thing
it was to control the temper. He must have been a good
man, 'cause he was unusual solemn an' wore his hair Ioni-
an' oily ; but he only looked at one side o' the question. I 've
known fellers who had such good control o' their tempers
that after they 'd once been put out o' humor over some little
thing, they could keep from bein' good tempered again for
a year. And then again, when a feller keeps too tight a
holt on his temper, his hands get numb, an' his temper 's
liable to shy at some silly thing an' get clear away from
him.

What I liked about both the Friar an' Horace was, 'at they
had n't froze up all their f eelin's. It was possible to get 'em
stirred up about things, an' this alius struck me as bein'
human; so I was glad to see Horace warmin' his feet in

204

FRIAR TUCK

i 11

the small o' the Friar's back, an' I whistled a jig under my
breath while gettin' breakfast.

They grumbled consid'able when I rousted 'em out; but
by the time they had soused their heads in the crick, they
were in good humor again ; an' hungry ! Say ! Ever since
I 'd give him his treatment, Horace had had an appetite like
a stray dog ; while the Friar alius was a full hand at clearin'
tables, except on his one oflf-day a week. I gave the Friar
a wink just as Horace splashed into his third cup o' coffee,
an' sez : " Friar, you should have seen this creature when
he first came out here. His muscles had all turned to fat,
so that he could hardly wobble from one place to another,
an' he was so soft that when he'd He down at night, his
nerves would stick into him an' keep him awake. Now, if
it was n't for that f ringy thing he wears on his face, he 'd
look almost exactly like a small-sized human."

The only come-back Horace made was to start to sing
with his mouth full o' cornbread an' bacon. This was
more 'n any one could stand, so I tipped him over backward,
an' asked the Friar which way he was headin'.

The Friar's face went grave at once ; and then he began
to post me up on Olaf the Swede. I had heard some rumors
that summer, but hadn't paid much heed to 'em. It
now turned out that the Friar and Olaf had struck up
friendly affiliations; so he was able to give me all the
details.

Badger-face had a disposition like a bilious wolf, and
when he was denied the satisfaction o' jerkin' Olaf out o' this
world, he had turned to with earnest patience to make Olaf
regret it as much as he did. Olaf could stand more 'n the
youngest son in a large family o' mules, but he had his
limitations, the same as the rest of us ; so when he saw that

P^ACE TO START A QUARREL 205

Badger was engaged in makin' the earth no fit place for him
to habitate, he began to feel resentful.

When a boss is mean, he is still the boss and he don't irri-
tate beyond endurance; but a foreman is nothin' but a
fellow worker, after all ; so when he gets mean, he 's small
and spidery in his meanness; and I reckon 'at Olaf was
justified in tryin' to unjoint Badger-face, thorough and
complete.

O' course, Ty had to back up Badger for the sake o' dis-
cipline; but he didn't wreak any vengeance on Olaf when
he tendered in his resignation, which proves 'at Ty still was
full o' respect for Olaf. Badger was groanin* on his back
when Olaf left; but he called out that he intended to get
square, if he had to wear all the curves oflf his own body
to do it.

Olaf had the gift o' sensin' men, all right ; but his judg-
ment was n't such as to make a yearlin' bull willin' to swap,
and what he did was to take the Pearl Crick Spread as a
homestead. It was only about fifteen miles from the Cross
brand ranch house, and it was one o' the choicest bits in the
whole country. This act was on a par with an infant baby
sneakin' into a wolf den to steal meat. The Friar put the
finishin' touch by sayin' that Olaf had bought the old, run-
down T brand, and then I lost patience.

" Does Olaf sleep with a lightnin' rod connected to the
back of his neck ? " I asked as sober as a boil.

" What do ya mean ? " asked the Friar, who was innocent
about some things.

" Well, that looks like another good way to attract trouble,"
sez I.

" Olaf does not want any trouble," sez the Friar with dig-
nity. " All he wants is an opportunity to work his claim in

2o6

FRIAR TUCK

ri ii
ii

1 t

.i-,

peace. He has more self-control 'ii airy other man I 've ever
known."

" It 's a handy thing to have, too," sez I, " providin' a fel-
ler knows how to use it. Why, ya could change a T brand
to a Cross quicker 'n a one-armed Mexican could roll a
cigarette. Ty Jones '11 get more o' that brand 'n ever Olaf
will. How is Kit Murray gettin' along?"

" She is a fine girl," sez the Friar, his face lightin'. " She
has cut out all her wild ways, and Mother Shipley sez her
daughter thinks as much of her as if they was sisters. I got
word last week 'at her husband died in a hospital; and I
hope she '11 marry Olaf some day."

" Well, I '11 bet the liquor again' the bottle 'at she never
does it," sez I. " In the first place, she 's got too much style,
and in the second, she 's got too much sense. Ty 's already
got more stuff 'n he can take care of through a dry summer,
and the next one we have, he is goin' to need Fearl Crick
Spread. A grizzly traffics along without bein' disturbed,
until he gets the idee that he owns consid'able property,
and has legal rights. Then one day the' don't seem to be
anything else demandin' attention, so out go a parcel o'
men and harvest the grizzly. That 's the way it '11 be with
Olaf."

" I advised him to move," sez the Friar ; " but he *s set in
his ways."

" Self-control," sez I, " I was workin' in a mine once
with a mule and a Hungarian ; and both of 'em had an un-
usual stock o' self-control. One day right after a fuse had
been lit, the mule decided to rest near the spot ; an' the Hun
decided to make the mule proceed. We argued with 'em
as long as it was safe ; but the mule • ad his self-control an'
all four feet set, and the Hun was usin' his self-control an'

PEACE TO START A QUARREL 207

a shovel. All we ever found was the mule's right hind leg
stickin' through the Hungarian's hat, and we buried these
jus' as they was."

The Friar sighed, pursed up his lips, and sez : " I wish I
could help him."

" Help him all you can, Friar," sez I ; " but after the fuse
is burnin', you pull yourself out to safety. Ty Jones could
easy spare you without goin' into mournin'."

The Friar rode on about his business, an' me an' Horace
went back to the ranch, him pumpin' me constant for further
particulars about Olaf an' Kit. " Horace," sez I finally,
" did you ever see these folks ? "
" I never did," sez he.

" Then," sez I, " what you got again' 'em 'at you want 'em
to marry ? "

" Marriage," sez he with the recklessness common to old
bachelors, " is the proper condition under which humans
should live — and besides, I don't like what you tell about
Ty Jones."

From that on, Horace began to talk hunt; and when
Horace talked anything, he was as hard to forget as a split
lip. He had brought out some rifles which the clerk had told
him would kill grizzlies on sight, and Hor xre had an awful
appetite to wipe out the memory o' that woocchuck.

I admit that no one has any right to be surprised at any-
thing some one else wants to do ; but I never did get quite
hardened to Horace Walpole Bradford. When ya looked at
him, ya knew he was a middle-aged man with side-burn
whiskers ; but when ya listened to his talk, he sounded like
a fourteen-year-old boy who had run away to slaughter
Injuns in wholesale quantities.

All of his projecs were boyish; he purt' nigh had his

2o8 FRIAR TUCK

backbone bucked up through the peak of his head before he 'd
give in that ridin' mean ones was a trade to itself; and the
same with ropin', and several other things. It ground him
bitter because his body hadn't slipped back as young as his
mind, an' he worked at it constant, tryin' to make it so.

He wore black angora chaps, two guns, silver spurs,
rattlesnake hat-band, Injun-work gauntlets, silk neckerchief
through a silver slip, leather wristlets, an' as tough an ex-
pression as he could work up; but the one thing of his old
life he refused to discard was his side-bums. Sometimes
he 'd go without shavin' for two weeks, an' we 'd all think
he was raisin' a beard ; but one day he 'd catch sight of him-
self in a lookin'-glass, an' then he 'd grub out tne new growth
an' leave the hedge to blossom in all its glory.

We were long handed for the winter as usual, an' the'
wasn't any reason why we couldn't take a hunt; so Tank
an' Spider egged him on, an' I was n't much set again' it
myself. Horace agreed to pay us our wages while we were
away, an' offered Jabez pay for the bosses; but o' course
he would n't listen to it; and for a few days he even talked
some o' goin' with us, though he didn't ever care much for

huntin'.

Finally we started out with a big pack train an' enough
ammunition for an army. Besides me an' Horace, the' was
Tank, Spider Kelley, Tillte Dutch, an' Mexican Slim. Slim
was to do the cookin', an' the rest of us were to divvy up
on the other chores all alike, Horace not to be treated much
different simply because he was payin' us our wages; but
he was to have the decidin' vote on where we should go an'
how long we 'd stay. It was fine weather most o' the time,
though now an' again we 'd get snowed up for a day or so
in the high parts.

PEACE TO START A

QUARREL 209

I had alius felt on friendly terms with the wild creatures;
an' I had told him before we started that I wouldn't have
no part in usin' bosses for bear-bait, nor shoolin' bears m
traps, nor killin' a lot o' stuff we had no use for ; but Horace
turned out to be as decent a hunter as I ever met up with,
an' after the second day out he did as little silly shootm' as
any of us. He was n'. downright blood-thirsty, like a lot of
'em who get their firsi taste too late in life. He cared more for
the fun o' campin' out an' stalkin' game than he did for kilhn'.
We only got one silver-tip, most of 'em havin' holed up; but
we found all the other game we wanted. Horace killed the
grizzly, which was a monster big one, and this wiped the
woodchuck off his record, and inflated his self-respect until
the safety valve on his conceit boiler was fizzin' half the tune.
We made a permanent camp not far from Olaf 's shack, an'
it didn't take me long to see at the foxy Horace was more
interested in Olaf an' his war with Ty Jones than he was
in huntin'. As soon as we had our camp arranged, he got
me to take him over to Pearl Crick Spread to call on Olaf.
I told him that Olaf wasn't what you'd call sociable; but
he insisted, so we went.

We found Olaf in an infernal temper, an' some tempted
to take it out on the first human he met; but this didn't
phaze Horace. He thought he could start Olaf by tellin'
him that Kit Murray was a widow; but the Friar had
already told him and Olaf would n't thaw worth a cent. He
kept on askin' questions, even when they was n't answered,
until Olaf got hungry an' asked us in to eat dinner with
him. After we had eaten, we sat around the fire smokin', an'
Horace looked as contented as a cat. He kept at his ques-
tionin' until he got Olaf to talkin' freer 'n I had supposed
he could talk.

i:i':

I '!'■

I fit

210 FRIAR TUCK

Horace tried him out on all sorts o' things, an' vhen Olaf
snubbed him, why, he just overlooked it an' tried somethin'
else. Finally he tried his hand at religion, an' this was what
loosened Olaf up. Now Olaf was actually religious, and
called himself a Christian, but the' was a heap o' difference
between his brand o' it an' the Friar's.

Olaf's God took more solid satisfaction in maUin' hell
utterly infernal than a civilized community takes in a pene-
tentiary; an' Olaf was purty certain as to who was goin'
there. When he got to talkin' religion in earnest, his
face grew hard an' his eyes bright, an' he gloated over
the souls in torment till he showed his teeth in a grin.
The' wasn't any doubt in his mind that Ty Jones was
goin' to be among those present, an' this led him into tellin'
what had put hin so far out o' humor before we 'd come

along.

He had found another one of his cows shot an' only a
couple o' steaks cut off. He fair frothed at the mouth when
he told us this, ar' he did n't make any bones of givin' Ty
the credit for it. He cut loose an' told us a string o' things
'at he knew about Ty, an' ya could n't blame him for feelin'
sore. He talked along in a rush after he got started, tellin'
o' the way 'at Ty changed brands an' butchered other
fellers' stock an' wasn't above takin' human life when it
stood in his way. " He made me as big a devil as he is,"
sez Olaf ; " an' now he knows 'at I can't get any backin' ;
so he is just persecutin' me; but some o' these days, I'll
get a chance at him."

Horace had dropped into a silence while Olaf was talkin' ;
but now he raised a finger at me, an' said : " I '11 tell you
what we'll do: instead of huntin' ordinary wild beasts.
we'll just keep watch on Olaf's stuff, an' when any one

PEACE TO START A QUARREL 211
bothers it, why, we'll take 'em into some town with a

jail."

Olaf shook his head, an' I told Horace that the* was n't
any law for hip cattle men ; but Horace was all worked up,
an' after we'd left Olaf an' started for camp, he didn't
talk of anything else. He put it before the boys ; but they
were all again" it, an' told him a lot o' tales about fellers who
had tried to buck the big cattle men. Horace called us
all cowards ; but we only laughed at his ignorance an' let
him carry on as far as he liked. He sat up way into the
night broodin' over it, an' from that on he did a lot o'
scoutin' on his own hook. We used to keep an eye on him,
though ; so after all he had his own way about it, an' Olaf 's
stuflf was watched purty close.

The boys was proud of Horace, just as they 'd have been
proud of a fightin' terrier; but they was worried about
him, too, in just about the same way.

" I tell you, that little runt would shoot to kill if he got
a chance," sez Tank Williams, one night while Horace was

away.

"Aw ya can't tell," sez Spider. *' He thinks he would;
but he 's never been up against it yet, an' ya can't tell."

" Well, what if he did shoot," sez Slim, " we would n't
have to mix in, would we ? "

"You know blame well we'd mix in," sez Tank, "an'
you can't tell where it would end. U Horace had 'a' come
out here when he was a kid, he 'd 'a' turned out one o' the
bad men for true. It 's in his blood. Look at him ! when
he came here first, he did n't have no more get-up 'n a sofy
piller ; but look what he 's gone through since. I saw him,
myself, march along without food for four days, an' when
we came up with that cow, he was willin' to help kill her

212 FRIAR TUCK

with a rock or strangle her to death, an' he did n't make no
more bones o' calf-milkin' her than a coyote would. He
started out in life with more devilment in him 'n any of us,
an' what he 's achin' for now is a mix-in with the Cross
brand outfit. That 's my guess."

" An' that 's my guess," I chimed in ; but just then we
heard two shots close together, then a pause an' three more
shots. We jammed on our hats an' guns an' rushed outside.
It was a moonlight night, an' we hustled in the direction
o' the shots. Before long we made out Horace an' Tillte
Dutch comin' towards us, an' Horace was struttin' like
Cupid the bulldog used to walk, after he 'd flung a steer.
It was the first time I 'd ever noticed this, but I noticed it
plain, out there in the moonlight.
"What's up?" I asked.

" I reckon 'at somebody knows by now that Olaf's stuff
is havin' a little interest took in it," sez Horace.

We came back into the old log cabin where we was
campin', an* Dutch told about how Horace had got him to
walk with him, an' had sat down on a rock where they could
see Olaf's little bunch o' cattle grazin*. He said 'at Horace
sat with his rifle across his lap and kept watch like an Injun
scout.

After a time they saw two men creep out of a ravine not
far from where they was sittin' an' sneak down on the
bunch o' cov . One of 'em had shot a cow, an' Horace
had shot him, bringin' him down, but not killin' him. The
two had run for the ravine, an' Horace had tried to cut
'em off, an' he had gone along 'cause Horace had ; but the
two had got to their bosses first. Each o' the two had taken
one shot, an' Horace had shot back but none o' these last
shots had hit anything, an' the two had got away.

PEACE TO START A QUAR7EL 213
" I '11 bet they have n't got so far away but what we '11
hear from 'em gain," sez Tank.
" The thing for us to do is to start back to the Diamond

Dot," sez I.

" We shall stay here, an* see what happens," sez Horace,
lightin' his pipe. His eyes were dancin' an' he was all
puffed up. I did n't say any more. I just looked at him.
He was the same old Horace, side-burns an' all ; but still
the' was enough difference for me to begin to regret havin'
give him the treatment. I had cured his nerve so complete
it seemed likely to boss the whole crowd of us into trouble.

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

A PROGRESSIVE HUNT

|; :;!:■

The Friar sez it 's all rot about men bein' better for havin'
sowed their wild oats when young. He sez 'at it 's utter
foolishness to sow any crop ya don't want to harvest ; but
I dunno. I don't mind havin' a colt try to turn himself
inside out with me on its back; but I'm some prejudiced
again' an old boss which is likely to pitch when I 've got
other business to attend to. When a young boss is mean,
why, ya can reason it out of him; but when an old boss
turns bad, you might just as well put the outlaw label on
him an' turn him adrift.

We could n't do a thing with Horace after he 'd taken his
shot at the feller who potted one of Olaf's cows. Ol' Tank
Williams was huge in size an' had a ponderous deep voice
which rumbled around in him like a bulldog croakin' in
a barrel ; an' he decided that it was his duty to be firm with
Horace, seein' the way 'at he had bluffed him when we went
on that trip for the nerves ; so the follcrin' mornin' he put
a scowl on his face, grabbed Horace by the chest of his
shirt, lifted him so 'at nothin' but the tips of his toes touched,
an' sez : " Look here, you little whippcrsnapper, we agreed
to go where you said an' stay as long as you said ; but we
meant on a game-huntin' trip. You have n't any idee what
you 're up again' out here, an' you got to give in an' come
back with us."

Tank's free eye rolled about in his head, runnin' wilder 'n

A PROGRESSIVE HUNT 215

I 'd ever seen it ; but Horace was n't as much phazed as if
a fly had bit him. He scowled down his eyebrows, an' piped
out in his squeaky tenor : " Take your hand off me, Tank —
and take it off now."
'• I 've a notion to raise it up an' squash ya," sez Tank.
"Yes," sez Horace, without blinkin' a winker, "you've
got notions all right; but they lie so far to the interior of
ya that they generally weaken before they find their way
out. Take your hand off me."

Well, Tank was beat. He gave Horace a shove, but
Horace was light on his feet, an' he never lost his balance.
He just danced backward until he had his brakes set, an'
then he fetched up in front o' the fire, put his fists on his
hips, an' stared up at Tank haughty.

" Ignorance," sez he, " is the trouble with most people.
The ignorant alius judge by appearances. If body-size was
what really counted, why, we'd have an elephant for an
emperor. Instead of which we use 'em to push logs around.
Goliath did a lot o' talkin' about squashin' David, but as soon
as David got around to it, he fixed Goliath all ready for the
coroner. Napoleon was of small size, an' fat, an' nervous,
but he didn't count it a fair day's work unless he had pre-
sented one of his relatives with a full-sized kingdom.
Where are the buff alos — where are they — the big clumsy
brutes! They're shut up out o' harm's way, that's where
they are; but where are the mosquitoes? Why the mos-
quitoes are takin' life easy at all the fashionable summer
resorts. If you feel like freightin' your big, fat carcass
back to where it don't run any risk o' bein' bumped into,
why go ahead; but I 'm goin' to stick around here an' see
what happens."
Well, there we were: we didn't none of us have the

! Nil

216

FRIAR TUCK

courage to own up *at we were afraid of anything 'at Horace
wasn't afraid of; so we decided to stick with him, but
that he had to take the blame. It was Tillte Dutch who said
this, an' Horace looked at him an' grinned. " Take the
blame? " sez he. " Why you big chump, it 's the small-sized
men who alius take the blame. The big boobs rush about,
makin' a lot o' noise ; but they only do what the small-sized
men tell 'em to. I 'U take the blame all right, an' if you
back me up, you '11 be right pleased to have a share in the
kind o' blame the's goin' to be. This Ty Jones outfit is
nothin' but a set o' cowardly bullies who sneak around in
the dark doin' underhanded work; but I intend to let the
daylight in."

" I '11 bet the daylight will be let in, somewhere," sez I ;
" but I 'm just fool enough to stick with ya."

Tank was still smartin' from the way it had been handed
to him. " Say," sez he, " p'raps you don't know it ; but
that David you was cacklin' about a while ago was n't nothin'
but a sheep-herder."

" That don't change no brands," sez Horace, who did n't
have any more use for a sheep-herder 'n we did. " He was
a small-sized man, an' he just drove sheep a whi! . to help
his father out. Sheep-herdin' wasn't his regular trade.
Bossin' men an' fightin' an' bein' a king was his natural
line o' business. It alius seems to me 'at big, overgrown
men ought to be sheep-herders, so they could drive about
in house-wagons, an' not wear down so many good bosses."

or Tank slammed about, makin' a lot o' noise; but he
had lost this deal, an' it was plain to see.

" I 'm goin' to ride over to Olaf 's, an' tell him about what
happened last night, an' say 'at we'll keep an eye on his
stuff if so be he wants to take a little trip to Billings." said

A PROGRESSIVE HUNT 217

Horace; and when he started I went along with him. At
first Olaf was so white-hot about havin' another cow killed
that he couldn't think; but finally he looked at Horace a
long time, an' said: "You have very brave flame, an' you
speak true. I shall go to Billings, an' trust everything

with you."

I was flabbergasted clear out o' line at this; but Olaf
packed some stuff on one boss, flung his saddle on another,
an' set off at once. Now, I knew Olaf to be slow an' stub-
bom, an' I could n't see through this.

After Olaf had rode out o' sight to the north, Horace sez:
" Has he alius been crazy? "
" He 's not crazy," sez I.

" Then what did he mean by sayin' I had a very brave
flame an' that I spoke true? " sez Horace. " Course he 's
crazy. Did n't you notice his eyes."

"Yes," I sez, "I've noticed his eyes a lot; but I don't
think he's crazy -except in thinkin' 'at Kit Murray 'U
marry him. Why, she would as soon think o' marryin' a

he-bear as Olaf."

" Well, I think they have drove him crazy," sez Horace ;
" but I 'm goin' to bestir myself in his favor."

He took himself as serious as if he had been Napoleon
an' David both ; an' I could smell trouble plain. We decided
to move our camp down to Olaf's. an' wrangle his herd into
the Spread every night. Pearl Crick Spread was as fine
a little valley as a body ever saw; filled with cottonwoods
an' snugglin' down out o' the wind behind high benches.
The crick came in through a gorge, an' went out through
a gorge; an' it was plain to me that the Spread was worth

fightin' for.
When we got back to the camp we found that a couple o

2l8

FRIAR TUCK

Cross brand boys had happened along, by accident, of
course, an' were tryin' to swap news o' the weather for
news o' the neighbors. Our crowd hadn't loosened up
none; and as soon as we came back the Cross-branders
left

Horace looked pleased. "I bet I got one of 'em last
night," sez he, shakin' his head.

Well, we all grinned, we could n't help it. " I bet you
get another chance at 'em, too," sez Slim. Our outfit had
been peaceable for so long that the prospect of trouble
actually made us feel nervous enough to show it.

We moved down to Olaf's, and each night we fetched in
his little bunch o' cows, an' alius kept up some bosses in the
corral. The Cross-br^^nders used to wander by our place
purty frequent, but alius in the matter o' business.

One day, after we'd been livin' at Olaf's about a week,
Badger-face Flannigan, an' a pair of as mean-lookin'
Greasers as ever I saw, came ridin' along. Me an' Horace
had been up in the hills after some fresh meat, an' we see
them before they saw us. They were ridin' slow an' snoopin'
about to see what they could pick up, an' when they saw us
they looked a bit shifty for a moment.

Then Badger wrinkled up his face in what was meant
for a friendly grin, an' sez : " Hello, fellers. Have you-un's
bought Olaf out?"

" Nope," sez I. " We 're just out here for a little huntin' ;
an' Olaf got us to look after his stuff for a few days while
he went visitin'."

"Wasn't the' any huntin' closer to home?" sez Badger-
face, a little sarcastic.

" Not the kind o' huntin' we prefer," sez Horace, sort o'
dreamy like.

A PROGRESSIVE HUNT

219

Badger-face drilled a look into Horace, who had put on
his most no-account expression. "What's your favorite
game," sez he, "snow-shoe rabbits?"

" Oh, no," drawled Horace as if he felt sleepy, " silver-
tips an' humans is our favorite game; but o' course the
spring is the best time — for silver-tips."
"Where might you be from?" asked Badger-face.
" I might be from Arizona or Texas," sez Horace ; " but
I ain't. I'm a regular dude. Can't you tell by my
whiskers ? "

Badger-face was so puzzled when Horace gave a little
rat-laugh ,hat I had to laugh too; and ya could see the
blood come into Badger's cheeks, but still, he could n't savvy
this sort o' game, so he could n't quite figure out how to
start anything.

Horace had practiced what he called a muscle-lift, which
he said he used to see the other kids do on parallel bars ; and
now he slipped to the ground an' tightened his cinch an'
cussed about the way it had come loose, as natural as life.
Then he put one hand on the horn an' the other on the cantle
an' drew himself up slow. He kept on pushin' himself
after his breast had come above the saddle u:*'' he rested
at arm's length. Then he flipped his right leg ov.., an' took
his seat as though it was nothin' at all. Any one could see
it was a genuwine stunt, though it was of no earthly use to
a ridin' man.

Now, just because the' was no sense to this antic, it made
more of an impression on Badger-face than the fanciest sort
o' shootin' or ropin' would 'a' done ; an' he puzzled over what
sort of a speciment Horace might be, till it showed in his
face.
" Come on down an' have supper with us," sez Horace.

-fe-

'i!|

I'lil

220 FRIAR TUCK

" You can sec for yourself what the prospect for fresh meat

is ; 90 you can be sure of a welcome."

" No, we can't very well come this cvenin'," se* Badger-
face.

" Why not? " sez Horace. " You look to me like a man
who was gettin' bilious for the want of a little socia-
bility. Come on down an' we'll swap stories, an' have
a few drinks, an' I'll sing ya the best song you ever
hearkened to."

" No, we got to be goin'," sez Badger-face ; an' he an'
the Greasers rode off while Horace chuckled under his
breath as merry as a magpie.

" That 's what you call a bad man, k it .' " sez he. " I tell
you that feller 's a rank coward."

"Would you have the nerve to pick up a horn-toad?"
sez I.
" No," sez he ; " 'cause they 're poison."
" They ain't no more poison 'n a frog is," I sez ; " but
most people thinks they are, an' that is why strangers are
afraid of 'em. Now, Badger-face ain't no coward. He's
a shootin' man ; but he can't make you out, an' this is what
makes him shy of ya."

"Well," sez Horace, "I'd rather be a free horn-toad
than a mule in harness. Come on, let 's go eat."

The next afternoon Horace went along to help bring in
the bunch o' cattle ; an' some one up on the hill took a shot
at him. He could n't ride up the hill, so he hopped oflF the
pony, an' started up on foot. Mexican Slim was closest to
him, an' he started after ; but the feller got away without
leavin' any trace. Horace was wonderful pleased about it,
an' strutted more than common.
" There now," sez he after supper ; " do you mean to tell

A PROGRESSIVE HUNT 221

me 'at that feller was n't a coward? Why the' ain't enough
sand in their whole outfit to blind a flea! "

We just set an' smoked in silence. When a feller as little
as him once begins to crow, the's nothin' to do but wait till
his spurs get clipped.

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

A LITTLE GUN-I'LAY

It's curious how hard it is, sometimes, to get trouble
started. We all Knew 'at the Cross-branders was ready
to clean us out, an' itchin' for the job; but the's one
curious little holdback in the make-up of every healthy
animal in the world. Every sane animal the' is wants
self-defence as his excuse for takin' life. I admit that
now and again beasts an' men both get a sort o' crazy
blood-lust, an' just kill for the sake of it; but it's the
rare exception.

One of us alius made it a point to go along with Horace ;
an' most times when we 'd meet up with any o' the Cross-
branders,, they 'd never miss the chance to fling some polite
smart talk at him; but the little cuss could sass back
sharper 'n they could, an' I reckon they was suspicious that
he would n't 'a' been so cool if he had n't had bigger backin'
than was in sight. It was perfectly natural to think 'at he
had been sent out as a lure by some big cattle outfit, or even
the government ; so they went cautious till they could nose

out the game.

One day Badger-fact an' the two Greasers came along
when Horace was out ridin' with Tillte Dutch. Dutch
was one o' these innocent-lookin' Germans — big, wide-open
eyes, a half smile, an' a sort of a leanin' to fat. He never
had but one come-back to anything — which was to splutter;
but he was dependable in a pinch.

A LITTLE GUN-PLAY aaa

" Whatever made you so unspeakable little? " scz Badger-
face to Horace.
Horace looked behind him, an' all about, an' then scz in

surprise: "Who, me?"

" Yes, you," sez Badger-face. " You seem to dry down
a little smaller each day."

" Well," sez Horace, speakin' in a low secret-tellin' tone,
" I '11 tell ya ; but I don't want ya to blab it to every one ya
see. When I was a young chap, I used to go with a big,
awkward, potato-brained slob, about your size. I could out-
shoot him, out-ride him, run circles around him, an' think
seven times while he was squeezin' the cells of his brain so
they 'd touch up again' each other ; but one day he made a
bet that he could eat more hog-meat 'n I could ; an' he won
the bet. When I found out that the' was one single thing 'at
this big, loose- jointed galoot could beat me at, I felt so blame
small that I never got over it, an' this is why I disguise
myself in these whiskers."

The two Greasers couldn't help but grin, an' the fool
Dutchman sniggered. This was more 'n Badger-face could
stand. He shot his hand across an' pulled his gun quick as
a flash ; but Horace did n't move, he just sat still, with a
friendly smile on his face ; an' Badger-face sat there with
his gun in his hand, scowlin' jerk-lightnin' at him.

Spider an' Slim had gone after meat that day, an' they
came into view with the carcase of a doe, just as Badger
drew his gun. Me an' Tank was listed to wrangle in the
bunch, an' we came ridin' along just after the other two
came into view. The Greasers gave a little cough an'
Badger-face looked up an' saw us. It looked like a put-up
job, all right ; an' chariots of fire, but he was mad! Pullin'
a gun on a man is the same as shootin' at him. Badger-face

I':

>(<■

224 FRIAR TUCK

had been tricked into givin" us just grounds to slaughter
him, and he was n't quite sure what move to make next
Our outfit had been purty well advertized, through cleanm'
out the Brophy gang, me an' Mexican Slim were both two-
gun men an' known to be quick an* accurate, while Tank
was ever-lastin'ly gettin' into trouble, owin' to his friendly
feelin's for liquor. As we drew closer we made our smoke-
wagons ready, while his two Greasers kept their hands in
plain view, and harmless.

Badger had a trapped look in his face; but he didn't say
anything, an' he didn't cover Horace with his gun; he just
held it ready. We did the same with ours, an* it was the
foolest lookin' group I was ever part of. Ol* Tank was the
one who finally started things. " Look here, Badger-face,"
he bellowed, " if you so much as harm a hair o' those blamed
or whiskers, why, we 'U have to put ya out o' business."

Horace turned an' looked at Tank in surprise. " Aw, put
up your gun," he said. " Badger-face ain't in earnest. We
had an argument the other day : I said 'at a man lost time
crossin' his hand to pull his gun, an' he said it could be done
quicker that way 'n any other ; so to-day he joked me about
bein' as small in the body as he is in the brain, an' I came
back at him, also jokin' in a friendly way; an* he took this
excuse to pull his gun on me, without any ill intent; but
only to prove how quick he could do it. It stuck in his
holster, though; an' if we'd been in earnest, I 'd have had
to kill him. I 've had him covered all this time; but you
can see for yourselves 'at his gun ain't cocked. Now put up
your guns, and next time, don't be silly."

I know 'at Horace did n't have any gun in his hand when
we came up; but when he stopped speakin', he pulled his
hand with a cocked gun in it out from under his boss's

A LITTLE GUN-PLAY 225

mane, an* Badger-face was the most surprised of any

of us.

" Come on down to supper, Badger-face, an' I '11 sing ya
my song," sez Horace. *' We alius seem to have fresh deer-
meat when you happen along."

We all put up our guns along with Badger-face, an' he
mumbled some sort of an excuse an' rode away with the
Greasers. O' course we'd ought to 'a' killed him right
then, 'cause he was more full o' hate than a rattler ; but the
simple truth was, that Horace had gained control over us
complete, an' we let him have his way.

" When did you get that gun in your hand, Horace?" I
sez to him after supper. " You did n't have no gun when

I rode up."

" That 's what 's puzzlin' Badger-face right this minute,"
sez Horace. " I did n't draw that gun until Tank made his
talk; but at the same time I wasn't as defenceless as I
looked. I have told you all the time 'at that man did n't have
the nerve to harm me. He 's a coward."

" I reckon you '11 be killed one o' these days, still believin'
that," sez ol' Tank. " How much fightin' experience have
you ever had ? "
" How much did Thesis ever have? " asked Horace.
" Never heard of him," sez Tank. " Who was he? "
" He was a Greek hero," sez Horace. " He never had
had a fight till he started out to go to his father ; but he
cleaned out all the toughs along the way, an' when he
reached his father, who was king of Athens, he found
'em just ready to send out seven young men an' seven
maidens, which they offered up each year to the Minnietor,
which was a beast with the body of a man, and the head
of a bull, just like Badger-face. Thesis volunteered, an'

F 1

ill

226 FRIAR TUCK

what he did was to kill Uie Minnietor a«' end aU that

nonsense." ,

" Well, I never heard tell o' that before, an* I don't more n
half believe it now." sez Tank ; " but I 'm willin' to bet four
dollars 'at the Minnietor did n't know as much about gun-
fightin' as what Badger-face does. He'll get ya yet, you
see if he don't."

" Tell ya what I 'm game to do." sez Horace. " I 'm game
to go right to Ty Jones's ranch house alone. Do ya dare

me?"

" No, you don't do that," sez I. " That 's a heap different

proposition. Ty Jones wouldn't pull his gun without
shootin' ; and besides, he 'd most likely set his dogs on ya.'^
" Well, I own up 'at I don't want no dealin's with dogs,"
sez Horace, thoughtful. " Dogs have n't enough imagination
to work on. If they 're trained to bite, why, that 's what
they do; but give a human half a chance, an' he 'II imagine
a lot o' things which are not so. You could n't tell Badger-
face a big enough tale about me to make him doubt it. I
tell ya, I got him scared."

We didn't argue with him none; the' was some doubt
about him havin' Badger-face f^ooled; but the' wasn't any
doubt about him havin' himself iooled — which is the mam
thing after all, I reckon. Anyway, we let Horace sit
there the whole evenin'. tellin' Greek-hero tales^ which
must have blistered the imagination o' the feller 'at first

made 'em up.

Along about nine o'clock we be/an to stretch an' yawn ;
but before we got to bed. Mexican .^lim said 'at he heard a
noise at the corral, an' we all looked at one another, thinkin'
it was the Cross-branders ; but Horace was the first one to
get back into his boots an' belt ; an' he also insisted on beitf

A LITTLE GUN-PLAY 227

the first to open the door, which he did as soon as we blew
out the candle. Then we all filed out an' sneaket^ i

toward the corral ; but first thing we knew, a voice out o*
the dark whispered: "This is mc-Olaf. Is everythmg

all right?"

We told him it was. an' he whistled three times. You
could 'a' knocked me down with a feather when Kit Murray
an' the Friar came ridin' up; an' then we turned the ponies
loose an' went into the house. It only had two rooms,
countin' the lean-to kitchen, an' we made consid'able of a
crowd ; but we were all in good spirits, on account of Olaf
gettin' the girl an' us bein' able to hand him back his stuff
with not one head missin*.

It had been some interval since I 'd seen Kit Murray, an'
I was surprised to view the change in her. She did n't look
so much older, but all the recklessness had gone out of her
face, an' it had a sort of a quiet, holy look about it. " Kit."
I sez, " I wish ya all the joy the' is; but I 'd 'a' been willin'
to have ^et my eyes 'at you 'd never take Olaf. I was glad
to see him go up after ya. "cause gettin' knocked on the head
is some better 'n bein' kept hangin' on a hook; but you sure
got your nerve with ya. This homestead is purty likely to
get in some other folks' way."

Kit had as snappy a pair o' black eyes as was ever stuck
in a face; and now they flashed out full power. " I know
it 's goin' to be hard to hold this place," sez she, " but I
reckon I can help a little. I can ride an' shoot as well as a
man, if I have to. and you know it. I don't want anythmg
but the quietest sort of a life the' is ; but I 'm ready to stand
for any sort o' luck 'at comes along. As for Olaf, he 's the
onlv man in the world for me. I saw sor'Khing o' the big
cities back east, an' Billings, an' the boys on the range here.

'I:

228 FRIAR TUCK

and out of 'em all, Olaf 's my man. The thing I hope more 'n

anything else is, that we can die together."

Her voice caused a hush to come to the room. I had
meant to be jovial an* hearty; but the' was an undercurrent
of earnestness in her voice which put a tingle into a
feller. Kit Murray had changed a heap, but all for the

better.

Olaf cleared his throat, an' we all took a look at him. He
had changed, too. He had lost the chained-bear look he
generally wore, an' the' was a light o' pride an' satisfaction
in his face which was good to look upon. " Boys," he said.
" I 've been purty tough an' unsociable, an' I don't see why
you've took so much trouble for me; but I tell ya right
here that I stand ready to square it in any way or at any
time I can. Now, it seems mighty funny 'at Kit Murray
should love me, an' I can't account for it any more 'n you
can ; but I knew right from the start that she did love me —
I could tell by the light. H ever the time comes that she
don't love me any more, I get out of her way, that 's all about
that ; but I 'm not goin' to make her stay here any longer 'n
I have to. I sell out when I get the first chance. Friar
Tuck, he softened my heart, an' he watched over her. He "s
a man. That 's all I can say."

Well, this was an all-around noble speech for a stone
image like Olaf had been, an' we cheered him to the echo;
but Horace had sort o' been jostled to the outside an' forgot.
Now, he come forward an' shook Olaf by the hand an' con-
gratulated him, an' sez: " The's one thing I 'd like mightily
to know, an' that is — what the deuce do you mean by this
light you 're alius alludin' to? "

Olaf was some embarrassed : but it never seemed to fuss
Horace any when he had turned all the fur the' was in sight

A LITTLE GUN-PLAY 229

the wrong way; so he just waited patiently while Olaf
spluttered about it.

" I don't know myself," sez Olaf. " Always, since I was
a little child, I have seen a floating light about people. I
thought every one saw this light an' I spoke of it when I
was a child an' asked my mother about it many times ; but
at first she thought I lie, an' then she thought my head was
wrong; so I stopped talkin' about it; but always I see it
an' it changes with the feelings and with the health. All the
colors and shades I cannot read, but some I know. I knew
that Kit Murray loved me before she knew it, and I knew
that the Friar was a true man when they told me tales of
him. Animals, too, have this floatin' light about 'em, an'
I can tell when t^ 'v are frightenec' an' when they are mean.
This is why I hai .-ie bosses without trouble. Now I do not
know why my eyes are this wiy ; but I have told you because
you have been good friends to me. I do not want you to
tell of this because it makes people think I am crazy."

" Course it does," sez Horace. " It made me think you
were crazy. I never heard of anything like this before. Tell
me some more about it."

" There is no more to tell," sez Olaf. " When I see the
flame I do not see the people. The flame wavers about them,
and sometimes I have seen it at night, but not often. I do
nothing to make myself see this way. Always my eyes did
this even when I was only a baby."

"Well, you have everything beat I ever saw yet," sez
Horace. " What do you think o' this, Friar? "

" I never heard of such a case," sez the Friar ; " although
it may have been that many have had this gift to some ex-
tent. I think it is due to the peculiar blue of Olaf's eyes.
I think that this blue detects colors or rays, not visible to

230 FRIAR T IJ C K

ordinary eyes. I wish that some scientist would study

them." ,,

" I '11 pay your way back East, Olaf," sez Horace, \t

you '11 have your eyes tested."

" No, no," sez Olaf, shakin' his head. " I don't want to
be a freak. What is the use? I can not tell how I do it, so
it cannot be learned; and I do not want things put into my
eyes for experiments. No, I will not do it."

*' Tell me how Badger-face looks to you," sez Horace.

" Oh, he is bad," sez Olaf. *' He has the hate color, he
loves to kill; but he is like the wolf; he does not like the
fight, he wants always to kill in secret."

" I bet my eyes are a little like yours," sez Horace, noddin'
his head. " I knew 'at Badger-face was this way as soon

as I saw him."

" Oh, here now," sez the Friar. " You are puttin' down
a special gift to the level of shrewd character-readin'."

" What sort of a flame does a dead person have, Olaf ? "

sez Horace.

A queer look came into Olafs face, a half-scared look.
" A dead person has no flame," sez he, with a little shudder.
" It is a bad sight. I have watched; I have seen the soul
leave. When a man is killed, the savage purple color fades
into the yellow of fear, then comes the blue, it gets fainter
and fainter around the body ; but it gathers like a cloud
above, and then it is silver gray, like moonshine. It is Mot
in the shape of the body, it is just a cloud. It floats away.

That is all."

" Well, that 's enough," sez Horace. " Can you see any
flame about a sleeping person?"

" Yes," sez Olaf, " just like about a waking person; and
there is marks over a wound or a sick place."

A LITTLE GUN-PLAY 231

" Well, Mrs. Svenson," sez Horace to Kit, " you '11 have
to be mighty careful or your husband will find you out."

" I am perfectly willin'," sez Kit with a proud little smile.
She was game, all right, Kit was.

" That is why I say it is all right," sez Olaf . " She is
young, she cannot know how she will change. If ever she
no longer love me, I will not bother her. That would be
a foolishness ; but so long as she love me, no other man will
bother her. That would be devilishness ! "

" You certainly have a nice, simple scheme of life," sez
Horace. " If ever you change your mind, I '11 put up the
money to take you back East, an' pay you high wages."

"No," sez Olaf, "I hate circuses an' shows, an' such
things. I not go."

" You say you can tell sick places, an' fear, an' hate, an'
honesty," sez Horace. " Now, when I came out here, I was
just punk all over. You give me a look-over, an' tell right
out what you see."

At first Olaf shook his head, but we finally coaxed him
into it; an' he opened his eyes wide an' looked at Horace.
As he looked the blue in his eyes got deeper an' deeper, like
the flowers on the benches in June, then when the pupil was
plumb closed, the blue got lighter again, and he said : " You
have not one sick point, you have good thoughts, you are
very brave, you are too brave — you are reckless. You have
very great vitality, an' will live to be very old — unless you
get killed. I knew an old Injun — over a hundred years old
he was — he had a flame like yours. It is strange."

You could actually see Horace swellin' up with vanity at
this ; but it made ol' Tank Williams hot to see such a fuss
made about a small-caliber cuss ; so he rumbles around in his
throat a minute, ;ui' sez : " Well, you fellers can fool around

but

232 FRIAR TUCK

all night havin' your souls made light of, if ya want to;

as for me I 'm goin' to bed."

Kit insisted that we sleep on the floor just as we had been,
while she an' Oiaf bunked in the lean-to; but a warm
Chinook had been blowin' all day, an' it was soft an' pleasant,
so we took our beds out in the cottonwoods. Horace an'
the Friar got clinched into some kind of a discussion; but
the rest of us dropped off about as soon as we stretched out.
The moon was just risin', an' one sharp peak covered with
glitterin^ snow stood up back o' the rim. I remember thinkin'
it might be part o' the old earth's shiny souL

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

NIGHT-PROWLERS

Whenever thes anything on my mind I sleep purty light;
an' the whole Cross brand outfit was on my mind that night ;
so it 's not surprisin' that I woke up after a bit. The moon
had climbed consid'able, an' the stars told me it was about
two. I had been sleepin' alone ; Horace havin' decided to
crawl in with the Friar so they could quarrel at short range.
The Friar's tarp was next to mine, an' I raised myself on
my elbow an' looked at it. I could hear him breathin' nat-
ural, an' the bulk of him was so large that Horace would n't
have made much of a mound anyway ; so at first I could n't
tell whether he was there or not. I crept out till I could sit
up an' get a clear view ; but Horace was n't there, so I put
on my boots as quick as ever.

I sneaked over to the Friar's tarp ; but Horace's hat was
gone, so I knew he was up to some mischief, an' started for
the corral to see if he had taken a boss. What I feared was,
that he had got to thinkin' about what a super-wonderful
flame he had, and had decided to give it a fair work-out by
sneakin' down to Ty Jones's on his own hook. I was worried
about this because I knew they 'd do for him in a minute, if
they 'd catch him where they could hide all traces.

Olaf had built a large square corral an' a smaller round
one, to do his ropin' in ; and when I reached the near side o'
the square one, I heard a slight noise near the gate of the
round one. I peered through the poles of the corral, but the

234 FRIAR TUCK

dividin' fence got in the road so 'at I couldn't see, an' I
started to prowl around. All of a sudden. Horace's squeaky
tenor piped out : " Halt " ; an' I flattened out on the ground,
thinkin' he had spotted me; but just then the' was a
smothered curse from the round corral, an' when I started
to get up I saw Badger-face vault over the fence in the
direction of Horace's voice.

Then I saw Horace standin' behind a clump with his gun
on Badger-face. " Put up your hands," sez Horace.

Badger was runnin' straight for him ; but he put up his
hands at this order, and came to a slow stop about five feet
from Horace. The square corral was still between me an'
them, an' I drew my right gun an' started around, keepin* my
eye on 'em as much as I could through the poles.

"I reckon I got ya this time," sez Horace, just as I
reached the corner.

" I reckon you have," sez Badger in a give-up voice; but
at the same moment he took a step forward, threw his body
back, an' kicked the gun out of Horace's hand. Then he
lunged forward an' got Horace by the throat, flung him on
his back an' straddled him — an' I broke for 'em on the run.
Just before I reached 'em, the' came a heavy, muffled report,
an' Badger-face fell on his side an' rolled over on his back,
clutchin' at his breast.

Horace rose to his feet, holdin' a toy pistol, put his hands
on his hips, looked down at Badger-face, an' sez: " If you 'd
'a' just asked Olaf what kind of a light I give out, you 'd 'a'
stayed at home an' saved your life." That 's how nervous
Horace was.
" Don't stand an' talk to a shot man," I sez. " Alius get

his gun first."

Horace gave a jump at the sound o' my voice, an' covered

NIGHT-PROWLERS

335

me with his pop-gun. " Oh, it 's you, is it ? " he sez. " Well,
then, you get his gun ; but I don't much think he can use it."

By the time I had lifted Badger's gun, the other boys were
arrivin', an' when they found that Horace had gone out
alone an' shot a hole through Badger-face, they certainly
was some surprised. Purty soon Kit Murray came out with
Olaf, an' then Horace told about not feelin' sleepy an' bein'
so disgusted at the way we were snorin' that he had got
up to take a little stroll. He said he just went toward the
corral 'cause that was the least uninterestin' place he could
think of, and that Badger had sneaked down an' started to
cut the stirrups off the saddles right before his eyes.

" I gave him all the time he wanted," sez Horace, " so 'at
there would n't be any doubt as to his intentions. I reckon
'at cuttin' up saddles in another man's corral is goin' about
far enough, ain't it?"

Just then the Friar finished his examination of Badger, an'
went after his saddle bags for a bandage. " Went clear
through his lung," was all he said as he passed us on the

run.

It was purty chilly at that time o' night ; and as the cold
began to eat in, it suddenly came over Horace that no matter
how much justified he was, he had shot an' most likely killed
a feller human, an' he began to shake. He went over to
Badger-face an' put his coat over him, an' sez: "Great
heavens ! are ya goin' to let this man lie out here in the cold
till he dies? Ain't the' some place we can put him? This

is horrible."

" Bring him in the house." sez Kit. " He don't deserve it ;
but we can't let him lie out here — can we, Olaf ? "

"No," sez Olaf. "If you say bring him in, in he
comes."

ill ;

ii i

i ■

236 FRIAR TUCK

" That 's right, that 's fine. I don't bear him any malice,"
scz Horace. " I hope he gets over it an' lives to repent"

We packed him into the house an' Kit made a fire an'
heated some water. As soon as the water was hot, the Friar
cleaned out the wound with it an' some foamy stuflf out of
a bottle. Then he dissolved a drab tablet in some water an'
tied up both openings. Horace sat in a corner durin' this
operation, with his head in his hands, shiverin'. The reaction
had set in ; an' all of us knew what it was, though I don't
suppose any of us had had the chance to give way to it as
free as Horace did.

Badger-face was all cut an' scarred when we stripped him ;
but he looked as tough an' gnarly as an oak tree, an' the
Friar said he had one chance in a hundred to pull through.
He did n't speak to us until after the Friar had finished with
him. Then he said in a low, snarly voice : " I don't much
expect to get over this ; but before I slip off, I wish you 'd
tell me who the little cuss who got me really is, an' what 's
his game."

We did n't hardly know what to say ; but finally Tank sez :
" We don't feel free to tell you who he is. Badger-face ; but
I '11 say this much, he ain't no officer of the law."

I thought it would be the quickest way to straighten
Horace up, so I told him 'at Badgcr-face wanted to talk to
him. Sure enough, Horace took a de-p breath an' stiffened
his upper lip. Then he walked over to the bed. " How do
ya feel, Badger- face ? " sez he.

"Oh, I been shot before," sez Badger; "but it burns
worse 'n usual th.s time, an' I reckon you've got me. It
grinds me all up to think 'at a little runt like you did it, an'
it would soothe me to know 'at you had some sort of a
record."

NIGHT-PROWLERS

337

Horace looked thoughtful : he wanted to comfort the man
he was responsible for havin' put out o' the game ; but he
could see that the whole truth would n't in no wise do, so he
put on a foxy look an' sez : " I never worked around these
parts none ; but if you 've ever heard o' Dinky Bradford,
why, that 's me. I know just how you feel. You feel as
much put out at bein' bested by a small-like man, as I would
at havin' a big feller get ahead o' me ; but you need n't fret
yourself. There 's fellers right in this room who have seen
me go four days without food an' then do a stunt which beat
anything they 'd ever seen. Don't you worry none. Now
that you *re down an' out, we all wish ya the best o' luck."
Me an' Spider an' Tank had to grin at this ; but it was
just what Badger needed to quiet him, an' his face lit up
when he asked Horace how he had managed to shoot him.

" I used my auxilary armyment," sez Horace, but that 's
all the explanation he 'd make. I found out afterward that
he had a thing called a derringer, a two-barreled pistol, forty-
one caliber, which he carried in his vest pocket. I told him
'at this sneaky sort of a weapon would give him a bad name
if it was found out on him; but he said 'at he shot from
necessity, not choice, and that when it came to gettin' shot,
he could n't see why the victim should be so blame particular
what was used — which is sensible enough when you come
to think it over, though I would n't pack one o' those guns,
myself.

Badger-face was out of his head next day, and for two
weeks foUowin'. The Friar an' Kit an' Horace took turns
nursin' him, an' they did an able job of it. Water, plain
water an' wind, was about all the Friar used in treatin' him.
Kit wanted to give him soup an' other sorts o' funnel fond ;
but the Friar said 'at a man could live for weeks on what

It .

338 FRIAR TUCK

was stored up in him ; an' Horace backed him up. Kit used
to shake her head at this, an' I kno>^ mighty well that down
deep in her heart, she thought they would starve him to
death before her very eyes.

We tore up the old shack on the hill, snaked the poles down
with Olaf's work team, an' set it up in the Spread; so 'at
we 'd be handy in case we was needed. A couple 0' the
Cross-branders drifted by, an' we gave 'em the news about
Badger-face an' Dinky Bradford havin' come together an'
Badger havin' got some the worst of it; but they wouldn't
go in to see him, an' they quit wanderin' by ; so 'at we did n't
hardly know what to expect.

We had hard work thawin' out the clay for chinkin', an'
we did n't get the cabin as tight as we 'd 'a' liked ; but we
had plenty o' wood, so it did n't much matter as far as
warmth was concerned ; but we had the blamedest time with
a pack-rat I ever did have.

I don't know whether pack-rats an' trade-rats is the same
varminU or not ; but neither one of 'em has a grain o' sense,
though some tries to stick up for the trade-rats on account
o' their tryin' to be honest. A pack-rat is about three times
as big as a barn rat, an* fifteen times as energetic. His
main delight is to move things. Horace said 'at he was con-
vinced they were the souls o' furniture-movers who had died
without repentin' of all the piano-lamps an' chiny-ware they
had broke. A pack-rat don't care a peg whether he can
use an article or not ; all he asks is the privilege of totin'
it about somewhere.

We were n't at all sure 'at v/e would n't be routed out in
the night ; so when we went to sleep, we 'd stack our boots
an' hats where we could find 'em easy. Sometimes the pack-
rat would toil so industrious 'at he 'd wake us up an' we 'd

NIGHT-PROWLERS

239

try to hive him ; but most o' the time he d work sly, an'
t'.en next mornin' we 'd find our boots all in a heap on the
table, or in the corner under tlie bunk or somewhere clear
outside the shack ; until we was tempted to move the shack
back where it was, there not bein' any pack-rats up there.

Then either the pack- rat ref >rmed into a trade-rat, or
else he sold out his claim to a trade-rat. Anyway, four
nights after we 'd been settled, we began to get trades for
our stuff.

Horace was sleepin' this whole night with us, an' next
mornin' he wakened before light an' started to dress so as
to relieve the Friar. He had put his boots on the floor under
the head o' his bunk, an' when he reached down for 'em he
found one potato an' the hide of a rabbit. The rabbit hide
had been tossed out two days before, an' it had froze stiff an'
had a most ungainly feel at that hour o' the mornin'. Horace
scrooged back into bed an' pulled all the covers off Tank
whom he was sleepin' with. When Tank awoke, he found
Horace sittin' up in the bunk with the covers wound around
him, yellin' for some one to strike a light.

We all struck matches an' finally got a candle lit. When
Horace saw what it was, he was hos-tile for true, thinkin'
it was a joke one o' the boys had put up. We had had a
hard time convincin' him o' the ways o' pack-rats, an' now
when we sprung trade-rats on him, he thought we were
liars without mercy ; but when the Friar came out to learn
what the riot was, an' told Horace it was all so about trade-
rats, he had to give in.

" Well, they 've got a heap o' nerve," sez he, from the
center o' the beddin' which was still wound around him, " to
lug off a good pair o' high-heeled ridin' boots, an' leave
an old potato an' the shuck of a rabbit in place of 'em! "

240 FRIAR TUCK

After this Horace took a tarp into Badger's room an
bedded himself down in a corner, which was all around the
most handy thing he could do; but the rest of us had a
regular pest of a time with that rat. We could n't find out
where the deuce he got in; but he distributed our belongin's
constant, an' generally brought us some of Olafs grub-stuff
in exchange. We couldn't trap him nor bluff him, an' it
generally took a good hour mornin's, to roun \p our wearin'

apparel.

One night we kept the fire goin' an' changed watchers
every two hours. Ol' Tank was on guard from two to four,
an' he woke us up by takin' a shot. We found him on his
back in the middle o' the floor, an' he claimed he had been
settin' in a chair an' had seen the rat walkin' along the lower
side o' the ridgepole with one o' Tillte Dutch's boots in hts
mouth. Dutch had the spreadin'est feet in the outfit, an'
we couldn't believe 'at a trade-rat could possibly tote it,
hangin' down from the ridgepole ; but Tank showed us a lot
o' scratches along the ridgepole, an' a bruise on his chin
where the boot had hit him when the rat dropped it. The
was also a hole in the boot where his bullet had gone, but
this did n't prove anything. Still, Tank stuck to his story,
so we had to apologize for accusin' him of lettm' his good
eye sleep while he kept watch with his free one.

We stuffed burlap into the hole about the ridgepole, an'
that night bein' Christmas eve, we all gathered in and held
festivities. We danced an' told tales an' sang until a late
hour. None of us were instrument musicians; but we
clapped our hands an' patted with our feet, an' Kit took turns
dancin' with us, till it was most like ? regular party. Mex-
ican Slim bet that he could do a Spanish dance as long as
Horace could sing different verses of his song; but we sup-

NIGHT-PROWLERS

141

pressed it at the ninety-first verse. Tank wanted to let him
finish, in the hope it might kill the trade-rat; but we
could n't stand any more, ourselves.

Then the Friar taught us a song called, " We three Kings
of Orient are"; an' we disbursed for the night. It was a
gorgeous night, an' me an' the Friar took a little walk under
the .stars. One of 'em rested just above tli crlisteny peak
up back o' the rim, an' he sang soft an 1 .v. the " Star of
beauty, star of night " part o' this sent,'. - ' ' u'Ui: lifto ' me
oflf the earth when he sang this way. '! hen »i ; -,>.i to tie:
"After all, Happy, life ppys bip tlis Mends, it ".e jus- ive
it hard enough"; an" he gave .. little igii an -tta i-i to
tend to Badger-face.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

THE trade-rat's CHRISTMAS-GIFT

Trade-rats have n't as much idee of real music as coyotes
have. Ninety-one verses of that infernal cow-song, sung
in Horace's nose-tenor, was enough to drive bed-bugs out
of a lumber-camp; but that night the trade-rat worked
harder than ever. We had hid our stuff an' fastened it down,
an' used every sort of legitimate means to circumvent the
cuss ; but he beat us to it every time, an' switched our stuff
around scandalous."
"Merry Christmas!" yelled Spider Kelley. holdin' up a

rusty sardine can.

The trade-rat had remembered us all in some the same
way, but we recalled what day it was an' took it in good
part'; until, all of a sudden, ol' Tank gave a whoop, an' held
up a brown buck-skin bag. We crowded around an'
wanted him to open it up an' see what was inside; but
he said it most probably belonged to Olaf or Kit or
the Friar; so we toted it into the cabin' an' asked tbe
one who could identify it to step out an' claim his

diamonds.

Then we had z surprise — not one o' the bunch could
identify the bag! We stood around an' looked at the bag
for as much as five minutes, tryin' to figure out how the deuce
even a trade-rat could spring stuff on us none of us had
ever seen before.

" This is a real trade, sure enough," .sez Horace.

TRADE-RAT'S CHRISTMAS-GIFT 243

" I tell ya what this is," sez I. " This is a Chri-tmas-gift
for the Friar. Go on an' open it, Friar."

The' was some soft, Injun-tanned fawn-skin inside,
wrappin' up a couple o' papers, an' two photographs, and
an old faded letter. " I don't think we have the right to
look at these," sez the Friar.

" Hovt '11 we ever find out who they belong to, then ? "
asked Horace. " Look at the letter anyway."

It was in a blank envelope, an' it began, " My dear son,"
and ended, " Your lovin' mother." The letter was just the
same as all mothers write to their sons, I reckon: full of
heartache, an' tenderness, an' good advice, an' scoldin' ; but
nothin' to identify nobody by ; so we said 'at the Friar should
read the papers. One of 'em was an honorable discharge
from the army; but all the names an' dates an' localities had
been crossed out. It was what they call an " Excellent "
discharge, which is the best they give, an' you could tell by
the thumb print 'at this part had been read the most by who-
ever had treasured it.

The other paper was simply a clippin' from a newspaper.
It was a column of items tellin' about Dovey wishin' to see
Tan Shoes at the same place next Sunday, an' such things.
The Friar said 'at this was the personal column, an' he sure
labeled it ; 'cause if a feller chose to guess any, some o' those
items was personal enough to make a bar-tender blush ; but
they did n't convey any news to us as to where the trade-rat
had procured the buck-skin bag.

The photographs were wrapped in tissue paper an' then
tied together with pink string, face to each. The Friar
balked a little at openin' 'em up; but we deviled him into
it. The first he opened was a cheap, faded little one of an
old lady. She had a sad, patient face, an' white hair. Horace

244

FRIAR TUCK

iiiij

was standin' on a chair, lookin' over the Friar's shoulder, an'
he piped out that the photograph had been took in New
York, an* asked if we knew any one who lived there, which
most of us did ; but not the subject of tlie photograph.

Then the Friar opened the other one. He took one ! ok
at it, an' then his face turned gray. " This one was took
in Rome," sez Horace. " Does any one here have a list o'
friends livin' in Rome, Italy ? "

He had n't looked at the face on the photograph, nor at
the Friar's face ; but when we did n't answer, he looked up,
saw that we had sobered in sympathy with the Friar, an'
then he looked at the face on the photograph an' got down
off the chair. The face was of a beautiful lady in a low-
necked, short-sleeved dress. Not as low nor a-; short as
some dresses I ve seen in pictures, but still a purty generous

outlook.

The Friar's hands shook some; but he gradually got a
grip on himself, an' purty soon, he sez in a steady voice:
" This is a picture of Signorina Morrissena. Does any one
here know of her ? "

Well, of course none of us had ever heard of her ; so the
Friar vvrapped up the package again an' put it back into
the buck-skin bag. We had expected to have some high
jinks that day, an' Kit had baked a lot o' vinegar pies for
dinner, we had plenty o' fresh deer-meat, an' we had agreed
to let the Friar hold a regular preachin' first ; but when we
saw how the picture had shook him up we drifted back to
our own shack an' sat talkin' about where the deuce that
blame trade-rat could possibly have got a holt o' the buck-
skin bag. I was purty sure that it was a picture o' the Friar's
girl, the extra trimmin's on the name not bein' much in the
way of a disguise, an' as soon as I got a chance to see Horace

TRADE-RAT'S CHRISTMAS-GIFT 245

I questioned him, an' he said it was the girl, all right ; but
that she had developed a lot.

The Friar had taken a hoss an' gone up into the mountains,
an' had left word that he did n't want any dinner. We were
as full o' sympathy with him as we could stand, but not in
the mood to sidestep such a meal as Kit had framed up ; so
we ate till after three in the afternoon. We did n't want to
do anything to fret him a speck ; so we hardly knew
what to do. Generally it tickled him to have us ask him to
preach to us ; but we could n't tell how he 'd feel about it
now, and we were still discussin' it about the fire when the
Friar came back.

He looked mighty weary, an' we knew he had been drivin'
himself purty hard, although it was n't just tiredness which
showed in his face. Still, the' was a sort of peace there,
too; so after he'd warmed himself a while, ol' Tank
asked him if ho would n't like to preach to us a bit.

The Friar once said that back East some folks used good
manners as clothin' for their souls, but that out our way
good-heartedncss was the clothin', an' good manners nothin'
more than a silver band around the hat. " And some o' the
bands are mighty narrow. Friar," I added to draw him out.
" Yes," sez he, " but the hats are mighty broad."

You just could n't floor ihe Friar in a case like this. He
knew 'at the politeness an' the good-heartedness in Tank's
request was divided off about the same as ti.c band an' the
hat ; and that all we wanted was to ease off the Friar's mind
an' let him feel contented; so he heaved a sigh and shook
his head at Tank.

When a blacksmith goes out into company, folks don't
pester him with questions as to why tempered steel wasn't
stored up in handy caves, instead of havin' nothin' but rough

246

FRIAR TUCK

ore hid away in the cellar of a mountain ; and a carpenter
is not held responsible because a sharp saw cuts better 'n a
dull one ; but it seems about next to impossible for a human
bein' to pass up a parson without insultin' him a little about
the ways o' Providence, and askin' him a lot o' questions
which would moult feathers out o' the ruggedest angel in the
bunch.

We could all see 'at the Friar had been havin' a rough
day of it ; so Tank began by askin' him questions simply to
toll him away from himself ; but soon he was shootin' ques-
tions into the Friar as rough shod as though they was both
strangers to each other.

" You say it was sheep-herders what saw the angels that
night the Lxjrd was bom," sez Tank. "How come the'
was n'l any cow-punchers saw 'em ? " Tank had about the
deep-rootedest prejudice again' sheep-herders I ever saw.

" The' was n't any cow-punchers in that land," sez the
Friar, " It was a hilly land an' — "

" Well I 'd like to know," broke in ol' Tank, " why the
Lord picked out such a place as that, when he had the whole
world to choose from."

O' course the Friar tried his best to smooth this out ; but
by the time he was through, Tank had got tangled up with
another perdicament. " Then, there was ol* Faro's dream."
he said, " the one about the seven lean cows eatin' the seven
fat ones. I 've punched cows all my life, and I saw 'em so
thin once, when the snow got crusted an' the chinook got
switched off for a month, that the spikes on their backbones
punched holes through their hides; but they'd as soon
thought o' fly in' up an' grazin' on clouds, as to turn in an'
eat one another."

By the time the Friar had got through explainin' the dif-

TRADE-RAT'S CHRISTMAS-GIFT 247

ference between dreams and written history, Tank was ready
with another query. " I heard tell once 'at the Bible sez, ' If
thy eye offends thee, pluck it out.' Does the Bible say this ? "
" Well, it does," admitted the Friar ; " but you see — "
" Well, my free eye offends me," broke in Tank, " It
never did offend me until Spike Groogan tried to pluck it
out, and it don't offend me now as much as it does other
folks. Still, I got to own up 'at the blame thing does offend
me whenever I meet up with strangers, 'cause it alius runs
wilder in front of a stranger 'n at airy other time. Now,
what I want to know is, why an' when an' how must I pluck
out that eye — specially, when it sez in another place that
if a man's eye is single his whole body is full o' light. My
eye is single enough to suit any one. Fact is, it 's so blame
single that some folks call it singular ; but the' ain't no more
light in my body 'n there is in airy other man's."

You couldn't work off any spiritual interpretation stuff
on Tank. He thought an allegory was the varmint which
lives in the Florida swamps. Well, as far as that goes,
I did, too, until the Friar pointed out that it was merely a
falsehood used to explain the truth; but Tank, he didn't
join in with any new-fangled notions, an' a feller had to
talk to him as straight out as though talkin' to a hoss. The'
was lots of times I did n't envy the Friar his job.

But after he had satisfied Tank that it was n't required of
him to discard either of his lamps, especially the free one, he
drifted off into tellin' us how he had spent the day — and
then I envied him a littie, for he certainly did have the gift
o' wranglm' words.

He told about bavin' rode up the mountain as far as he
could go, and then climbin' as far as he could on foot. He
showed how hard it was to tell either a man or a mountain

. i

248 FRIAR TUCK

by the lines in their faces, and he went on with this till he
made a mountain almost human. Then he switched around
and showed how much a mountain was like life, ambition
bein' like pickin' out the mountain, the easy little foothills
bein' the start, the summit alius hid while a feller was
climbin", and each little plateau urgin' him to give up there
and rest. He compared life and a mountain, until it seemed
that all a feller needed for a full edication, was just to have
a mountain handy. Then he wound up by sayin' that he
had n't been able to reach the peak. He had sat in a shel-
tered nook for a time, gazin' up at the face of a cliff with an
overhangin' bank o' snow on top. the wind swirlin' masses
o' snow down about him, and everything tryin' to point
out tb t he had been a failure, and might as well give up in
disg> "u He stopped here, and we were all silent, for, as was
ustr 'th him, he had led us along to where we could see
lit lugh his eyes for a space.

:er a time," sez the Friar as soon as he saw we were
•ui the Hght mood. " I caught my breath again and followed
the m row ledge I was on around to where I could see the
highest peat tand out clear and solitary ; and from my side
of it, it was r.\ possible for any man to reach it. There was
no wind here, the air was as sweet and pure as at the dawn
o' creation, and everywhere I looked I met glory heaped on
glory. A gray cloud rested again' the far side o' the peak,
and back o' this was the sun. Ah, there was a silver and a
golden linin' both to this cloud; and all of a sudden I was

comforted.

" I had done all I could do, and this was my highest peak.
Whatever was the highest peak for others, this was the
highest peak for me; and there was no more bitterness or
envy or doubt or fear in my heart. I stood for a long time

TRADE-RAT'S CHRISTMAS-GIFT 249

lookin' up at the gray cloud with its dazzling edges, and some
very beautiful lines crept into my memory — * The paths
which are trod, by only the evenin' and momin', and the
feet of the angels of God.' "

The Friar had let himself out a little at the end, and his
eyes were shinin' when he finished. " I guess I have given
you a sermon, after all, boys," he said, " and I hope you can
use it to as good advantage as I did when it came to me up
on the mountain. We all have thoughts we can't put into
words, and so I 've failed to give you all 'at was given me -,
but it 's some comfort to know that, be they big or be they
little, we don't have to climb any mountains but our own,
and whether we reach the top or whether we come to a blind
wall first, the main thing is to climb with all our might and
with a certain faith that those who have earned rest shall find
it, after the sun has set."

This was one of the days when the magic of the Friar's
voice did strange things to a feller's insides. We knew 'at
he was talkin' in parables, an' talkin' mostly to himself ; but
each one of us knew our own little mountains, an* it was
dam comfortin' to understand that the Friar could have as
tough a time on his as we had on ours.

We all sat silent, each feller thinkin' over his own prob-
lems; and after a time, the Friar sang the one beginnin',
" O little town of Bethlehem ! " It was dark by this time,
but the firelight fell on his face, an' made it so soft-like an'
tender that ol' Tank Williams sniffled audible once, an' when
the song was finished he piled a lot more wood on the fire,
an' pertended 'at he was catchin' cold. When Kit called us
in to supper, we all sat still for a full minute, before we
could get back to our appetites again.

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

A CONTESTED LIFE-TITLE

The bullet which had gone through Badger-face hadn't
touched a single bone. It had gone through his left lung
purty high up, but somethin' like the pneumonie set in, an'
he was a sorry lookin' sight when the fever started to die
out after havin' hung on for two weeks. He had been
drinkin' consid'able beforehand, which made it bad for him,
an' the Friar said it was all a question of reserve. If Badger-
face had enough of his constitution left to tide him over, he
stood a good chance ; but otherwise it was his turn.

He did n't have much blood left in him at the end of two
weeks on air and water, and he did n't have enough fat to
pillow his bones on. We all thought 'at he ought to have
something in the way o' feed ; but the Friar would n't stand
for one single thing except water. He said 'at food had
killed a heap more wounded men 'n bullets ever had ; so
we let him engineer it through in his own way.

When the fever started to leave, he got so weak 'at Horace
thought he was goin' to flicker out, an' he felt purty bad
about it. He did n't regret bavin' done it, an" said he would
do just the same if he had it to do over ; but it calls up some
mighty serious thoughts when a fellow reflects that he is
the one who has pushed another off into the dark. On the
night when it seemed certain that Badger-face would lose
his grip, we all went into his room an' sat around waitin'
for the end, to sort o' cheer him up a little. Life itself

A CONTESTED LIFE-TITLE 251

is a strange enough adventure, but death has it beat a
mile.

Along about nine o'clock, Badger said in a low, trembly
V(MC«: " What 'd you fellers do to me, if I go* well?"

He did n't even open his eyes ; so we did n't pay any heed
to him. When he first got out of his head, he had rambled
consid'able. Part o' the time he seemed to be excusin' himself
for what he had done, an' part o' the time he seemed to be
gloatin' over his devilment ; but the' was n't any thread to
his discourse so we didn't set much store by it. After
waitin' a few minutes, he quavered out his question again,
an' the Friar told him not to worry about anything, but just
to set his mind on gettin' well.

Badger shook his head feebly from side to side an' mumbled,
" That don't go, that don't go with me." He paused here
for a rest, an' then went on. "I 've been in my right mind
all day, an' I 've been thinkin' a lot, an' tryin' some experi-
ments. I can breathe in a certain way which makes me easier
an' stronger, an' I can breathe in another way which shuts
off my heart. I don't intend to get well merely for the
pleasure o' gettin' lynched ; so if that 's your game, I intend
to shut off my heart an' quit before I get back the flavor o'
life. It don't make two-bits difference with me either way.
What d' ya intend to do? "

He had been a long time sayin' this, an' we had exchanged
glances purty promiscuous. We had n't give a thought as
to what we would do with him, providin' he responded to
our efforts to save his life ; but it was purty generally under-
stood that Badger had fitted himself to be strung up, just the
same as if he had n't been shot at all. Now, though, when
we came to consider it, this hardly seemed a square deal.
There was n't much common sense in chokin' a man's life

2S2

FRIAR TUCK

down his throat for two weeks, only to jerk it out again at
the end of a rope, an* we found ourselves in somethin' ui a
complication.
" What do ya think we ort to do to ya? " asked Tank.
" Lynch mc." sez Badger, without openin' his eyes; " but
I don't intend to wait for it. I don't blame ya none, fellers.
I did ya all the dirt I could; but I don't intend to furmsh
ya with no circus performance — I 'm goin' on."

He began to breathe different, an' his face began to get
purplish an' ghastly. "Can he kill himself that way?"
I asked the Friar.

" I don't know," sez the Friar. " I think 'at when he loses
consciousness, nature 'II take holt, an' make him breathe the
most comfortable way — but I don't know."

" Let Olaf take a look at his flame," sez Horace; so Olaf
looked at Badger a long time.

Olaf hadn't wasted much of his time on Badger. lie

was n't long on forgiveness, Olaf was n't ; an' ever since the

time 'at Badger had been so enthusiastic in tryin' to have

him lynched for killin' Bud Fisher, Olaf had give it out as

his opinion that Badger was doomed for hell, an' he wasn't

disposed to take any hand in postponin' his departure. Olaf

was the matter-o'-factest feller I ever knew. The' don t

seem to be much harm in most of our cussin', but when

Olaf indulged in profanity, he was solemn an' earnest, the

same as if he was sayin' a prayer backwards.

" It don't look like Badger's flame." sez he after a time.

" It 's gettin' mighty weak an' blue, an' the's a thick spot over

his heart which shows plainer 'n the one over his wound."

" I move we give him a fresh start." sez Horace.

" He 'd ort to be lynched," sez Tank. " I don't see why

we can't try him out now, an' if we find him guilty, why ho

A CONTESTED LIFE-TITLE 253

can kill himself if he wants to, or else get well again an'
we '11 do it for him."

Neither what Horace said nor what Tank said called out
much response. We knew the' was n't any one could say a
good word for Badger-face an' so he well deserved his
stretchin* ; but on the other hand, there he was turnin' gray
before our eyes, an' it went again' our nature to discard him,
after havin' hung on to him for two weeks. The Friar left
the side of the bed an' retired into a comer, leavin' us free
to express ourselves.

" I don't see how we can let him go free," sez Tank. " He
scz himself 'at he ort to be lynched ; an' when a feller can't
speak a good word for himself, I don't see who can."

" Badger-face," sez Horace, " you 're the darnedest bother
of a man I ever saw. First you infest us until we have to
shoot a hole through you, an' then we have to nurse you for
two weeks, an' now you 're diggin' your heels into our con-
sciences. I give you my word we won't lynch you if you
get well. We '11 turn you over to the law."

Badger's thin lips fell back over his yellow teeth in the
ghastliest grin a live man ever hung out. " The law," sez
he with bitter sarcasm, " the law ! Have you ever been in a
penitentiary?"

" No," sez Horace, " I have not."

" Well, I have," sez Badger. " I was put in for another
feller's deed; an' they gave me the solitary, the jacket, the
bull-rings, the water-cure, and if ycu '11 roll me over after
I 'm dead, you can still see the scars of the whip on my back.
I 've tried the law, an' I '11 see you all damned before I try
it again."

Badger-face was as game as they generally get. As soon
as he stopped talkin' he began to breathe against his heart

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254

■

FRIAR TUCK

again. Horace stood lookin' at him for a full minute, an'
then he lost his temper.

" You 're a coward, that 's what you are ! " sez Horace.
" I said all along 'at you were a coward, an' another feller
said so too, an' now you 're provin' it. You can sneak an'
kill cows an' cut saddles in the dark, but you haven't the
nerve to face things in the open. Now, you 're sneakin' off
into the darkness o' death because you 're afraid to face the
light of life."

This was handin' it to him purty undiluted, an' Badger
opened his eyes an' looked at Horace. His eyes were heavy
an' dull, but they did n't waver any. " Dinky," sez Badger-
face, " the only thing I got again' you is your size. I 've
been called a lot o' different things in my time ; but you 're
the first gazabo 'at ever called me a coward — an' you 're
about the only one who has a right to, 'cause you put me out
fair an' square. I wish you had traveled my path alongside
o' me, though. You ain't no milksop, but after you 'd been
given a few o' the deals I 've had, you 'd take to the dark too.
You can call me a coward if you want to, or, after I 'm gone,
you can think of me as just bein' dog tired an' glad o' the
chance to crawl off into the dark to sleep. I don't want to be
on your conscience; that 's not my game. All I want is just
to get shut o' the whole blame business."

He talked broken an' quavery an' it took him a long
time to finish ; but v/hen he did quit, he turned on his bad
breathin' again. Horace had flushed up some when Badger
had mentioned milksop; but when he had finished, Horace
took his wasted hand in a hearty grip, an' sez : " I take it
back, Badger. You ain't no coward. I only wanted to
taunt you into stickin' for another round ; but I think mighty
well o' ya. Will you agree to cut loose from the Ty Jones

A CONTESTED LIFE-TITLE 255

crowd an' try to be a man, if we give you your freedom, a
new outfit, and enough money to carry you out of the
country ? "

!t was some time before Badger spoke, an' then he said :
" Nope, I can't do it. Ty knows my record, an' he 's treated
me white ; but if I quit him, he '11 get me when I least
expect it. Now understand. Dinky, that I don't hold a thing
again' you, you 're the squarest feller I 've ever met up with ;
but I 'm not comin' back to life again. From where I am
now, I can see it purty plain, an' it ain't worth the trouble."

" You coi'.ld write back to Ty that you made your escape
from us," sez Horace.

" That 's the best idee you 've put over," sez Badger, after
he 'd thought it out ; " but I have n't enough taste for life
to make the experiment. Don't fuss about me any more.
I don't suffer a mite. I feel just like a feller in the Injun
country, goin' to sleep on post after days in the saddle. He
knows it'll mean death, but he's too tired out to care a
white bean."

" Have you ever been in the army ? " asked the Friar from
his place in the corner. We all gave a little start at the
sound of his voice, for it came with a snap an' unexpected.

Badger's lips dropped back for another hideous grin.
" Ye.s," he said, " I 've been in both the penitentiary and the
army — and they 're a likely pair."

" Did you have a buck-skin bag? " asked the Friar, comin'
up to the bed.

Badger-face tried to raise himself on his elbow, but he
could n't quite make it. " Yes, I did," sez he, droppin' back
r^ain. " What became of it ? "

" I am keepin' it for ya," sez the Friar. " Do you wish
to leave any word in case you do not recover ? "

256 FRIAR TUCK

" No," sez Badger, " the' ain't no one to leave word to.
That letter was from my mother, an' that was her picture.
She 's been dead a long string o' years now."

"There was another picture an' a newspaper clippin',"
sez the Friar.

Badger-face didn't give no heed; an' after a time the
Friar sez: " What shall I do with them?"

" Throw 'em away," sez Badger-face. " They don't con-
cern me none. I was more took with that woman's picture 'n
airy other I ever saw. That was all."

" Where did you get it? " asked the Friar.
" I got it from a young Dutchy," sez Badger wearily. " He
killed a feller over at Leadville an' came out here an' took
on with Ty Jones. He said she was an opery singer, an'
got drugged at a hotel where he was workin'."

Badger-face was gettin' purty weak by now, an' he siopped
with a sort of sigh. The Friar took holt of his hand. " I
am very much interested in this woman," he said, lookin'
into Badger's face as if tryin' to give him life enough to go
on with. " Can you tell me anything else about her?"

" Not much," sez Badger-face. " She was singin' at what
he called the Winter Garden at Berlin, Germany. Some
Austrian nobility got mashed on her an' drugged her at the
hotel. Dutchy was mashed on her, too, I reckon. They
had advertised for him in a New York paper, an' when he
got shot, over at Little Monte's dance hall, he asked me to
write about it. His mother had died leavin' property, an'
all they wanted was to round up the heirs. I reckon they
were glad enough to have Dutchy scratched from the list.
I don't know why I did keep that clippin'."

" Have you any idee how long ago it was 'at the woman
was drugged?" asked the Friar.

A CONTESTED LIFE-TITLE 257

" I have n't any idee," sez Badger- face weakly. " Carl
was killed four years ago this Christmas eve; so it had to
be before that."

" Listen to me, Badger-face," sez the Friar, grippin' his
hand tight. " I want you to get well. I know that all these
men will stand by you and help you to start a new
life."

" How long is it since I 've been laid up ? " asked Badger.

" Two weeks," sez the Friar. " This is two days after
Christmas."

"Who tended to me?" asked Badger.

" We all did," sez the Friar, " and we all stand ready to
help you make a new start."

" I had a good enough start," sez Badger ; " but I fooled
it away, an' I 'm too old now to make a new one."

" Is there any word you want sent to your friends at Ty
Jones's ? " asked the Friar.

Once more Badger skinned his face into the grin.
" Friends? " sez he. " When you trap a wolf, does he send
any word to his friends ? I have n't got no friends."

" Swallow this milk," sez Horace holdin' some of '♦; out
to him in a big spoon. Kit had made Olaf start to milkin*
a cow, 'cause she wanted to use milk in cookin', and intended
to make butter when she had the cream saved up. Badger
put the milk in his mouth, an' then spit it out again.

" Don't you put anything else in my mouth," he sez. " I
told you I was goin' to die ; an' by blank, I am goin' to die."

" Fellers," sez Horace, turnin' to us, " do you think this
man is goin' to die ? " We all nodded our heads. " Then,
will you give his life to me, to do with as I will?" asked
Horace ; and we nodded our heads again.

Horace took off his coat, an' rolled up his sleeves, an*

258 FRIAR TUCK

then he came over an' shook Badger-face by the shoulder.
" Listen to me," he sez. " I fought ya once before, for your
life, and I 'm goin' to fight you for it now. Do you hear
what I say — I 'm goin' to fight you for your own life.
I 'm goin' to make you swallow milk, if I have to tie you
an' pour it in through a funnel. You can't hold your breath
an' fight, an' I 'm goin' to fight you."

Badger-face opened his eyes an' looked up into Horace's
face. He looked a long time, an' the ghost of a smile crept
into his face. " Well, you 're the doggonedest little cuss I
ever saw ! " he exclaimed. He waited a long time, an' then
set his teeth. " You beat me once," he muttered. " Now,
see if you can beat me again."

It was after midnight ; so when Horace dropped the hint
that he wouldn't need any help except from me an' the
Friar, the rest o' the boys dug out for the bunk shack.
Then Horace took us over to the fireplace an' asked us what
was ihe best thing to do.

" I do believe 'at you have stumbled on the right plan to
save him," sez the Friar. " He has no fever, the wound is
doin' splendid, and he has a powerful constitution. The
trouble is that he does not will to live. We must spur on his
will, and if we can make him fight back, this '11 help. Also
we must control him ^s much as. possible through suggestion.
Have you any plan o' your own?"

" No," sez Horace candidly. Horace did n't need any-
thing for any emergency except his own nerve. " I am
determined that he must live, but I have no plan."

" The first thing is to give him a little warm milk," sez
the Friar.

"All right," sez Horace. "You tell me what to do —
by signs, as much as possible — but let me give the orders

A CONTESTED LIFE-TITLE 259

to Badger-face. My size has made an impression on him,
and we can't afford to lose a single trick." The Friar
agreed to this an' we went back to the bunk.

" Badger-face," sez Horace, " I 'd rather give you this
milk peaceful ; but I 'm goin' to give it to ya, an' you can
bet what ya like on that."
■] Badger opened his eyes again, an' they were dull an'

glazy. " This reminds me o' the water-cure at the pen," he
said, an' then set his teeth.

" Hold his hands, Happy," sez Horace, as full o' fight as
a snow-plow. " Hold his head. Friar. Now then, swallow
or drown."

It looked purty inhuman, but Badger had to swallow after
a bit, an' when we had put as much milk into him as we
wanted — only a couple o' spoonfuls — we let him go, an'
he fell asleep, pantin' a little. We woke him up in half an
hour, an' put some more milk into him. When he slept, his
breathin' was more like natural, an' the fourth time, I
didn't have to hold his hands; so I went to sleep
myself.

Well, Horace won this fight, too. In about four days,
Badger-face began to have an appetite, an' then it was all
off with him. He couldn't have died if we'd left him
plumb alone ; but he had n't give up yet. The Friar kept
him down to a mighty in fan-tile diet, sayin' that a lung shot
was a bad one, an' tht pure mountain air was all that had
saved him; but even now fever was likely to come back
on him.

It was close to the tenth o' January when Horace came
in from a ride one evenin', an' went in to see Badger-face,
still wearin' his gun. Quick as a wink, Badger grabbed
the gun; but Horace threw himself on Badger's arm, an'

26o FRIAR TUCK

yelled for help. The Friar an' Olaf rushed in from the
lean-to, an' corraled the gun in short order.

" You blame little bob-cat, you ! " sez Badger. " I did n't
intend to use the gun on you."

" I know what you intended to do," sez Horace ; " but
you don't win this deal as easy as all that."

CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

A STRANGE ALLIANCE

After this we tied Badger-face in bed an' kept watch of
him. He kept on gettin' stronger all the time, an' a good
percent of his meanness came back with his strength. Some-
times he 'd spend hours tauntin' Horace an' the Friar ; but
they did n't mind it any more 'n if Badger had been a caged
beast. Then one night he concluded to try cussin'. He
started in to devise somethin' extra fancy in the way o' high-
colored profanity; but he hadn't gone very far on this
path, before Olaf came in as black as a thunder cloud.

" Do you want to be whipped with a whip ? " he demanded.

" Naw, I don't want to be whipped with a whip," sez
Badger-face.

" Then you stop swearin'," sez Olaf. " We been to enough
trouble about you, and I don't intend to have my wife listen
to any more o' your swearin'. U you don't stop it, I whip
all your skin off. You say you want to die — I whip you to
death before your very eyes."

Badger heaved at his ropes a time or two, an' then he
realized his weakness, sank back on the bed, an' the tears
rolled down his cheeks. He fair sobbed. " You 're a set o'
cowards," he yelled, " the whole pack o' you ! You would n't
let me die, and now you threaten to whip me to death. I
dare any one of ya to shoot me — you yellow-hearted
cowards ! "

" I care not for what you say I am," said Olaf. " You

262

FRIAR TUCK

! 'I

i;i.

lilt

know if I am a coward, and you know if I keep my word.
I say to you, slow an' careful, that if you yell swear words
again in my house, I whip your hide off."

Well, this had a quietin' influence on Badger's conversa-
tion ; but he fretted himself a good deal as to what we in-
tended to do with him. Finally one day when he began to
look a little more like a live man than a skeleton, Horace
sez to him : " Badger, you said you did n't have any friends,
an' it must be true, 'cause not one of your own outfit has
ever been to see you, not even Ty Jones."

" Ty Jones don't stay out here through the winter," sez
Badger-face. " If he 'd been here, he 'd have squared things
up for this, one way or another."

" Where does he go? " asked Horace.

" I don't know," sez Badger-face.

Horace asked Olaf about it, and Olaf said 'at Ty Jones
alius pulled out in December, an' didn't come back until
March.

Then Horace came in and sat by Badger again. " I 've
got a proposition to make to you," sez he, " and you think
it over before you answer. I have plenty o' money ; but
I 've wasted most o' my life, sittin' down. If you are sick
of livin' like a wolf, I '11 pay your expenses and half again
as much as Ty Jones is payin' you, and all you '11 have to
agree to is to go along as a sort of handy-man for me. I
think we can get to be purty good friends, but *hat can wait.
I intend to ramble around wherever my notions take rne. If
you '11 give your word to be as decent as you can, I '11 give
my word to stand by you as far as I 'm able. Your life is
forfeit to me, an' if you '11 do your part, I intend to make
the balance of it worth while to ya. Now, don't answer me ;
but think it over an' ask all the questions you want to. I '11

A STRANGE ALLIANCE

263

answer true what I do answer; but I won't answer any 'at
1 don't want to."

If Horace had crept in an' cut off his two ears, Badger
would n't have been any more surprised. Well, none of us
would, as far as that goes ; though why we should let any-
thing 'at Horace chose to do surprise us by this time is
more 'n I know.

He an' Badger talked it over complete for several days,
Horace agreein' that he would n't ask Badger to go anywhere
the army or the law was likely to get him an' not to make
him do any stunts 'at would make him look foolish. He told
Horace 'at he had served one enlistment an' got a top-notch
discharge, an' had then took on again ; but a drunken officer
had him tied on a spare artillery wheel because Badger had
laughed when the officer had fallen off his horse into a mud-
puddle. He said they had laid the wheel on the ground and
him across it, the small of his back restin' on the hub o' the
wheel, an' his arms an' legs spread an' tied to the rim, an'
had kept him there ten hours. He said that he had deserted
the first chance he got ; but he refused to tell what had hap-
pened to the officer afterward.

Finally Badger said he would take up Horace's proposi-
tion ; an' Horace called Olaf in to see if Badger was speakin'
true. This was the first Badger had ever heard about Olaf 's
eyes seein' soul-flames ; but he said 'at this explained a tot to
him he had n't understood before. Olaf looked at him care-
ful ; an' Badger held up his right hand an' said that as long
as Horace treated him square, he would be square with
Horace, even to the point of givin' up his life for him.

"He is speakin' true," sez Olaf; and from that very
minute. Badger- face became a different man, an' Horace took
off the ropes.

i il

364 FRIAR TUCK

" You do look some like a badger with that bum beard on,"
sez Horace; " but I don't like this name, and I want you to
pick out a new one. Pick out some Christian name, your
own or any other; but now that you are startin' on a new
life, it will help to have a new name."

Badger-face studied over this a long time, but he could n't
root up any name to suit him so he told Horace to pick
out a name, and he 'd agree to wear it.

" Well," sez Horace, after he 'd give it a good thinkin'
over, " I think I '11 call you Promotheus."

Badger looked at him purty skeptical. " I don't intend
to take no Greaser name," sez he. " Is that Mexican? "

"No," sez Horace. "That's Greek; an' the original
Promotheus was an all around top-notcher. He was a giant,
so you couldn't complain none on your size; he rebelled
again' the powers, so you couldn't call him a dog-robber;
but the thing 'at you two are closest together in, is your in-
fernal stubbornness. They tried to break Promotheus down
by chainin' him to a rock while the vultures fed on his liver,
but they could n't make him give in. ' Pity the slaves who
take the yoke,' sez he; ' but don't pity me who still have my
own self-respect.' "

Badger-face was so blame weak that his eyes filled up with
tears at this; an' the only way he could straighten himself
up was to put a few florid curses on his own thumby Icft-
handedness ; but Olaf had gone after some wood, so it did n't
start anything. " I 'U take that name," sez he, " an' I 'II
learn how to spell an' pronounce it as soon as I can ; but
you 've diluted down my blood so confounded thin with'your
doggone, sloppy milk diet that I 'm a long way from havin'
that feller's grit, right at this minute."

Horace stood over Badger-face, an' pointed his finger at

r'>

A STRANGE ALLIANCE 265

him, fierce. " Listen to me. " scz he. •' The next time you
heave out an insult to milksops or milk diets, I '11 sing you
my entire song — to the very last word."

We set up a howl ; but Badger-face did n't realize all he
was up against when he took on with Horace, so he only
smiled in a sickly way, an' looked puzzled.

" I 11 tell ya what I 'm willin* to do, Dinky," said he, as
soon as we stopped our noise ; " now that I 've took a new
name, I don't need to wear this sort of a beard any more,
an', if ya want me to, I '11 trim it up the same fool way 'at
you wear yours ; an' I '11 wear glasses, too, if you say the
word."

" We '11 wait first to see how you look in a biled shirt," sez
Horace ; " but in honor of your new name, I 'm goin' to
let you have some deer-meat soup for your dinner, an' a
bone to gnaw on."

We had a regular feast that day, and called Badger-face
Promotheus every time we could think up an excuse; so
as to have practice on the name. The Friar did his best
to take part ; but I knew every line in his face, and it hurt
me to see him fightin' at himself.

After dinner we took a walk together ; but we did n't talk
none until we had climbed the rim, fought the wind for a
couple of hours, an' started back again. It was his plan to
think of some big, common chunk of life when he was in
trouble, so as to take his mind as much as possible oflF him-
self ; and he started to talk about Horace an' Promotheus.
He even laughed a little at the combination which Promotheus
Flannigan an' Horace Walpole Bradford would make when
they settled down on the East again.

" The more I think it over," said the Friar, " the plainer
I can see that most of our sorrow an' pain and savageness

I 'I

266 FRIAR TUCK

comes from our custom of punishin' the crops instead of the
farmers. Look at the possibilities the' was in Promotheus
when he started out. He has a strong nature, and in spite
of his life, he still has a lot o' decent humanity in him. Who
can tell what he might have been, if his good qualities had
been cultivated instead o' smothered ? "

" That 's true enough," sez I ; " and look at Horace, too.
They simply let him wither up for forty years, and yet all
this time he had in him full as much devilment as Promo-
theus himself."

"Oh, we waste, we waste, we waste!" exclaimed the
Friar. " Instead o' usin' the strength and vigor of our man-
hood in a noble way, we let some of it rust and decay, and
some of it we use for our own destruction. The outlaw
would have been the hero with the same opportunity, and
who can tell what powers lie nidden behind the mask of
idleness ! "

" Well, that 's just it," sez I. " A human bein' is like a
keg o' black stuff. For years it may sit around perfectly
harmless ; and only when the right spark pops into it can we
tell whether it 's black sand or blastin' powder. Even Horace,
'iiraself, thought he was black sand ; but he turned out to be
a mighty high grade o' powder."

We walked on a while without talkin'; but the Friar v.dz
wrastlin' with his own thoughts, an' finally he stopped an'
asked me as solemn as though I was the boss o' that whole
country : " If you had started a lot o' work, and part of it
promised to yield a rich harvest with the right cafe, and part
of it looked as though it might sink back to worse than it
had been in the beginnin' — is there anything in the worid
which could make you give it up ? "

The Friar knew my life as well as I did ; so I did n't have

A STRANGE

ALLIANCE 267

" Yes," I sez, " the right

f %

to do any pertendin' with him.
woman would."

The Friar did n't do any pertendin' with me either. He
stood, shakin' his head slowly from side to side. " I wish
I knew, I wish I knew," he said.

We walked on again, an' when we came in sight o' the
cabin, I sez to him, in order to give him a chance to free
his mind if he saw fit : " Horace told me what he knew
about it."

" Yes, I know," sez the Friar ; " but no one knew very
much. She was a splendid brave girl, Happy. I had known
her when she was a little girl and I a farmer boy. I was
much older than she was, but I was alius interested in her.
There was n't one thing they could say against her — and
yet they drove her out o' my life. I thought she was dead,
I heard that she was dead; so I buried her in my heart,
and came out here where life was strong and young, be-
cause I could not work back there. I tried to work in the
slums of the cities ; but I could not conquer my own bitter-
ness, with the rich wastin' and the poor starvin' all about
me. I have found joy in my life out here ; but she has come
to life again with that picture, and once more I am at war
with myself."

" Well, I '11 bet my eyes, Friar," sez I, " that you find the
right answer; but I haven't got nerve enough to advise
ya — though I will say that if it was me, I M pike out an'
look for the girl."

"I wish I knew, I wish I knew," was all the Friar
said.

Promotheus didn't have any set-backs after this. We
talked over whether it would be better to have him go up to
Ty's an' tell the boys some big tale about Dinky Bradford,

268

FRIAR TUCK

n '^^

^1 ij^

Ilii

hi'

or to just pull out an' leave 'em guessin* ; and we finally came
to the conclusion 'at the last would be the best.

He was still purty weak by the first o' February; btit
he was beginnin' to fret at bein' housed up any longer, so
we began to get ready to hit the back-trail. By takin' wide
circles we could get through all right, at this season ; but
with Prometheus still purty wobbly, it wasn't likely to be
a pleasant trip, an* we did n't hurry none with our prepara-
tions. Horace insisted on payin' Olaf two hundred dollars
for his share o' the bother, an' I 'm purty certain he slipped
Kit another hundred. He wasn't no wise scrimpy with
money.

We started on the tenth of February, Promotheus ridin' a
quiet old boss, an' still lookin' purty much like a bitter recol-
lection. They were consid'able surprised when we arrived
at the Diamond Dot; but we only told 'em as much of our
huntin' as we felt was necessary.

Horace intended to start for the East at once; but next
day when he put on his dude clothes again, Promotheus purty
nigh bucked on him. Most of Horace's raiment was summer
stuflF, nachely ; but he had a long checked coat 'at he wore
with a double ended cap, which certainly did look comical.
He had cut some fat off his middle, an' had pushed out his
chest an' shoulders consid'able; so that his stuff wrinkkd
on him ; and it took a full hour to harden Promotheus to the
change.

" Do I have to look like that ? " sez he.

" You conceited ape you ! " sez Horace. " You could n't
look like this if you went to a beauty doctor for the rest o'
time; but as soon as we get where they sell clothes for
humans, I 'm goin' to provide you with somethin' in the
nature of a disguise."

A STRANGE ALLIANCE

269

Disguise sounded mighty soothin' to Promotheus, so he
gritted his teeth, an' said he would n't go back on his word.
The fact was, that it did give ya an awful shock to see Horace
as he formerly was. We had got so used to seein' him gettin'
about, able an' free, that it almost seemed like a funeral to
have him drop down to those clothes again.

The Friar went over to the station with us, and he an'
Horace had a confidential talk ; and then Horace and Pro-
motheus got on the train and scampered off East.

" I 'm goin' to stick right here, Happy," sez the Friar. " I
have let my work get way behind, in tendin' to Promotheus ;
but from now on I 'm goin' to tie into it again. I 'd like to
do something to put the cattle men and the sheep men on
better terms ; but this seems like a hard problem."

" Yes," sez I, " that ain't no job for a preacher, and I 'd
advise you to let it alone. The cattle men will put up the
same sort of an argument for their range 'at the Injuns did;
but between you and me, I doubt if they stand much more
show in the long run."

^^ " I can't see why there is n't room for both," sez the Friar.
" It seems to me that the cattle men are too harsh."

" Nope," sez I, " there ain't room for 'em both, an' the's
somethin' irritattn' about sheep that makes ya want to be
harsh with all who have dealin's with 'em. Hosses can starve
out cattle an' sheep can starve out hosses ; but after a sheep
has grazed over a place, nothin' bigger 'n an ant can find any
forage left. Cattle are wild an' tempestus, an' they bellow an'
tear around an' fight, and the men who tend 'em are a good
bit hke 'em ; while sheep just meekly take whatever you 've
a mmd to give 'em ; but they hang on, just the same, an' mul-
tiply a heap faster 'n cattle do. A sheep man is meek — like
a Jew. If a Jew gets what he wants he 's satisfied, an' he 's

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270

FRIAR TUCK

willin' to pertend 'at he 's had the worst o' the deal • but
cattle man is never satisfied unless he has grabbed what h
wanted away from some one else, an' then shot him up
httle for kickin' about it. It '11 probably be fifty or a hun
dred years yet. before the sheep men are strong enough t(
worry the cattle men; but they'll sure do it some day.'
That s what I told the Friar that time at the station, an' ]
guessed the outcome close enough, though I didn't mak<
much of a hit as to the time it was goin' to take

Well, the Friar, he rode away east to Laramie, and I went
north to the Diamond Dot, and got things ready for the
summer work.

CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT

THE HEART OF HAPPY HAWKINS

Late the next summer, I got a fine long letter from Horace
— and blame if he didn't succeed in surprisin' me again.
He wrote this letter from Africa, which is about the foreign-
est parts this world is able to exhibit, I reckon. He told
about the East not findin' favor with Promotheus, though
he had done all he could for him, startin* out with high
society and endin' up by takin' him down one night to a
sailor's saloon and lettin' him mix into a general fight ; but
that Promotheus just simply couldn't stand the tameness,
and so they had gone to A: :^a to hunt big game, and give
the folks out our way a chance to forget there ever had
been such a cuss as Badger-face.

He sent along some photographs, too, and they was as
novel as a blue moon — Horace, Promotheus, and a lot o'
naked niggers totin' packs on their heads. Horace was the
funniest lookin' mortal a body ever saw; but Promotheus
had him beat a mile. They both wore bowls on their heads
an' colored glasses; but Promotheus with side-bums was
sure enough to frighten a snake into c-vulsions! His
gnawin' teeth stuck out through a self-sa ed grin ; and
I was willin' to bet that as soon as the heathen saw him,
they 'd give up bowin' down to wood an' stone.

The next time I saw Friar Tuck, he told me about re-
ceivin' a letter from Horace who had gone to Berlin on his
way to Africa, but had n't been able to learn anything satis-

!i k

ill. i :

272 FRIAR TDCK

factory. The singer had been the big card at their concerts,
an' there had been some talk about her gettin' drugged by
an Austrian who belonged to the em-bassy; but she had
disappeared complete, an' nobody could be found who seemed
to know anything about it. The Friar kept himself goin*
, like a steam-engine these days ; but while he became a little
more tender if possible, he lacked something of his old-time
spirits. Before this, he used to come sweepin' along like
a big cool breeze, an' a feller's spirits just got up an' whirled
along with him, like dry leaves dancin' in the wind.

He said 'at since Promotheus had slipped out o' the
country, the Cross-branders had n't bothered Olaf any ; but
I called his attention to the fact that this was a wet spring,
an' told him 'at when we had a long dry spell, Ty Jones
would just swallow Olaf like quicksand.

Things drifted along purty steady in our parts for sev-
eral years. Once in a while, the Friar would tell me some-
thing about Olaf or something about Ty Jones ; but for the
most part, I was too much took up with other things to care
much for even the Friar's doin's.

I was takin' my own Moses-trip durin' these years ; and
I say now, as I alius have said, that it was n't a square shake
to show Moses the promised land, an' then not let him into
it for even one meal o' milk an' honey. I 've handled a small
bunch o' men an' trailed cattle with 'em for only three
months at a stretch ; but I don't mind tellin' you that the'
was times when I had to sit up till after midnight, sewin'
up the rips in my patience — an' we did n't have any women
an' children along either. Moses had forty years of it in the
desert; with a whole blame tribe of Israelties; and yet,
instead o' praisin' him for hangin' on to his sanity with all
the odds again' him, he was handed a tantalizer, simply be-

HEART OF HAPPY HAWKINS 273
cause he said he could n't see why somethin' did n't happen
in a natural, orderly way, once in a while, without everlast-
ingly ringin' in some new kind of a miracle on him.

If I had to pilot a mob like that through a desert for forty
years, foUerin' a cloud by day an' a pillar o' fire by night,
havin' dressed quail an' breakfast-food tossed to me out o'
the sky, gettin' my drinkin' water by knockin' it out of a
rock, an' tryin' to satisfy the tourists that it was n't altogether
my fault that we traveled so everlastin' slow — I 'd 'a' been
mad enough to bite all the enamel off my teeth, and yet as
far as I could see, Moses did n't do a single thing but show
out a little peevish once in a while.

Still, we did n't choose our natures nor the kind o' life to
range 'em over nor the sorts o' temptations we 'd prefer to
wrastle with ; an' even our own experiences are more 'n we
can understand — to say nothin' o' settin' back an' decidin'
upon the deeds of others. My own test was n't the one I 'd
'a' chosen ; and yet, for all I know, it may 'a' been the very
best one, forme.

Little Barbie had finally grown up through childhood to
the gates o' womanhood — and as generally happens, she had
found a man waitin' for her there. Through all the years of
her growin', she had been sendin' out tendrils which reached
over an' wound about my heart, and grew into it an' through
it, and became part of it. If it had n't 'a' been for Friar Tuck,
I might 'a' married her, myself; for I could have done it,
if all the men I 'd had to fight had been other men — but
the man I could n't overcome, was myself.

Through all the years I had known Friar Tuck an' rode
with him an' worked with him an' slept out under the stars
with him, he had been quietly trainin' me for the time when
it would be my call to take my own love by the throat, for

I '
hi,

yi e I

I ,1

974 FRIAR TUCK

the sake of the woman I loved. It don't weaken a man to
do this ; but it tears him — My God, how it does tear him !

I, my own self, brought back the man she loved to her,
and gave her into his arms ; and I 've never regretted it for
one single minute ; but I doubt if I 've ever forgot it for
much longer 'n this either.

I did what it seemed to me I had to do — an' the Friar
thinks I did right, which counts a whole lot more with me 'n
what others think. I went through my desert, I climbed my
hill, for just one moment I saw into my promised land —
and then I was jerked back, and not even given promotion
into the next world, which Moses drew as his consolation-
prize. And yet, takin' it all around, I can see where life has
been mighty kind and generous to me after all, and I 'm not
kickin' for a minute.

The great break in my life came in the fall, and it left ol'
Cast Steel a more changed man 'n it did me. I wanted to
swing out wide — to ride and ride and ride until I forgot who
I was and what had happened ; but the ol' man worked on
my pity, an' I agreed to stay on with him a spell. Durin' the
three ye" s precedin', I had got into the handlin' of the ranch,
more 'n he had, himself ; so I spent the winter makin' my
plans, an' goin' over *em with him. He came out toward
spring and was more like himself ; but when the first flowers
blossomed on the benches, they seemed to be drawin' their life
blood out o' my very heart. All day long I had a burnin' in
my eyes, everywhere I went I missed somethin', until the
empty hole in my breast seemed likely to drive me frantic;
an' one day I pertended to be mad about some little thing,

n' threw up my job for good and all.

The ol' man was as decent as they ever get. He knew
how I had been hit, an' he did n't try any foolishness. He

1 .vi'

HEART OF HAPPY HAWKINS 275

gave me what money I wanted, told me to go and have it
out with myself, an' come back to him as soon as I could.
I rode away without havin' any aim or end in view, just
rode an' rode an' rode with memories crowdin' about me
so thick, I could n't see the trail I was goin'.

Then one night I drew up along side o' Friar Tuck's fire,
saw the steady light of his courage blazin' out through his
own sadness, the same as it had done all those years; an'
I flopped myself off my hoss, threw myself flat on the
grass, an' only God and the Friar know how many hours
I lay there with his hand restin' light on my shoulder, the
little fire hummin' curious, soothin' words o' comfort, and
up above, the same ol' stars shinin' down clear and un-
changin' to point out, that no matter how the storms rage
about the surface o' the earth, it 's alius calm and right, if
a feller only gets high enough.

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

THE LITTLE TOWN OF BOSCO

■I!

I hadn't done much eatin' or sleepin' on that trip, an' I
was plumb beat out; so after I fell asleep, the Friar put
a soogan over me and left me by the fire. He awakened
me next momin', gettin' breakfast, and it didn't take
him very long to talk me into joinin' on to him for com-
pany. I had been avoidin' humans, for fear I might be
tempted to start trouble and find the easy way out of it all ;
but his plan was just the opposite — to dive so deep into
humanity that I could catch a glimpse o' the scheme o'
things.

The Friar held that we all had crosses comin' to us any
way. If we picked 'em up an' put 'em on our own shoul-
ders, we 'd still be free, an' the totin' of our crosses would
make us stronger ; while if we tried to run away, we 'd be
roped an' thrown, an' the crosses chained on us. I 'd a heap
sooner be free than a slave; so I decided to carry mine,
head up, an' get right with myself as soon as possible.

The Friar didn't work oflE any solemn stuff on me, nor
he did n't try to be funny ; he just turned himself into a
sun-glass, an' focused enough sunshine on to me to warm
me up without any risk of blisterin'. I got to know him
even better those days than I had before. His hair was
gettin' a bit frosty at the temples; but aside from this, he
had n't aged none since the first day I had seen him. He
was like some big tree growin' all by itself. Every year it

THE LITTLE TOWN OF BOSCO 2TJ

seems a little ruggeder, every year it seems to offer a little
roomier shade ; but the wind and the rain and the hot sun
don't seem to make it grow old. They only seem to make
it take a deeper root, and throw out a wider spread o'
boughs.

He told me o' some o' the scraps between the cattle men
an' the sheep men — the Diamond Dot was out o' the way
of sheep at that time. Then I began to take a little more
interest in things, an' after takin' note for a day or so, I
prophesied a dry summer; and this brought us around

to Ola! .

The Friar warmed up at mention of him. He said 'at he
had never seen a match turn out better 'n Olaf 's. He said
Kit had just what Olaf lacked, an' Olaf had just what Kit
lacked, an' their boy was jup* 'K)ut the finest kid he knew
of anywhere. We decided to .ad up their way an' pay a
visit.

As we rode along we took notice of the way things were
changin'. We passed several sheep wagon ■=;, five or six
irrigation ditches, an' here and there, we found men who
put more faith in alfalfa 'n they did in stock. The Friar
had been well to the north when I happened upon him, and
we traveled a sight o' country before we reached our desti-
nation. Everywhere folks knew him, an' he knew them;
and when I saw their faces light up at sight of him, I had
to admit that he had done the right thing in stickin*.

Mostly he sang the "Art thou weary," one for his
marchin' song, now; and it got into my blood and did a
lot to healthen me up again. I can't rightly say 'at I ever
got religion; but more 'n once religion has got me an'
lifted me up like the Crazy Water in flood, bearin' me on
over rocks an' through whirlpools, an' showin' me what a

i! ill;

ill

27B FRIAR TUCK

weak, utelcM thing I was at the best. Thc's somethin* in-
side me 'at alius responded to the Friar's music, an' made
me willin' to sweep on over the edge o' the world with
him ; but when he tried to reason out religion to mc, I have
to own up 'at the' was a lot of it I could n't see into.

We passed Skelty's old place on our way in, an' found
a red-eyed, black-headed man runnin' it. His name was
Maxwell, but they still called the place Skelty's. We went
in an' had dinner, an' found five or six Cross-branders
there. They were doin' plenty o' drinkin' an* crackin' idi-
otic jokes with the girls ; but they nodded friendly enough
to us, an' we nodded back.

As soon as we finished, the Friar went outside for his
smoke ; but I leaned back right where I was for mine. One
o' the Cross-branders, a tall, gaunt, squinty cuss by the name
o' Dixon, was >ittin' near me, and presently he turned an'
sez: " You 're Happy Hawkins, ain't ya?"

" That 's me," sez I.

" Well, on the level," sez he, " what became o' Badger-
face?"

" I 've often wondered about that myself," sez I.

"We supposed he got killed," sez he; "but two fellers
claimed they saw him goin' south in the spring with your
huntin' party."

" What made ya think he got killed ? " sez I.

" 'Cause he started over here one night, and never showed
up again," sez he.

"I don't know what become of him," sez I. "Dinky
Bradford said he was goin' to take him to Africa; but
whether he did or not I can't say. I never felt no call to
pry into Dinky's business. Looks to me as though we were
goin' to have an extra dry summer."

THE LITTLE TOWN OF BOSCO 379

"I say so too," sez Dixon. " Who was this Dinky
Bradford?"

" That 's bothered me a heap," sez I. " He claimed to be
a Greek hero, though what sort o' business that is, I can't
say. Finished your round-up yet ? "

"Just got through. Where is this Greek hero these
days?" sez he.

" Can't prove it by me," sez L " He 's one o' these fellers
no one seems to know anything about. I saw him gc with-
out eatin' for four days once, an' he came out of it ir better
shape 'n he went in. Badger-face was your foreman,
wasn't he?"
" Yes," sez he. " 01' Pepper Kendal is foreman now."
" I should think a foreman would have some load on his
shoulderj with the boss gone all winter," sez L

" The boss brought a woman back with him this time,"
sez Dixon.

"What!" sez L "You don't niean ta tell me 'at Ty
Jones has got him a woman after all these years ? "

" That 's what," sez Dixon. " Somethin' queer about her,
too. Ty has had a new shack built for her up back o' the
old house. They don't seem overly friendly for a bride
an' groom."
" Ain't nothin' overly friendly with Ty, is the'? " sez L
" Oh, I dunno," sez he. " Ty ain't as sticky as taffy, but
he 's a mighty good man to work for."
" What sort of a woman did he get ? " sez I.
" She don't show herself much," sez he. " SV? 's tall an*
shapely, an' right smart younger 'n Ty; but she spends
most of her time in the new shack; and from all we can
tell, she 'z froze up tighter 'n Ty is."
" Well, I guess we '11 have to jog on. Good luck/' sez I,

28o

FRIAR TUCK

il^ :l

IS 1

and me an' the Friar rode on. He was as much beat out
over Ty Jones gettin' a woman as I was ; but first thing he
thought of was, 'at this might have a softenin' effect on Ty,
an' give him an openin'.

We reached Olaf's in time for supper, and found Kit
bustlin' about as happy as a little brown hen. The Friar
had n't sprung it none about the kid. He was a solid little
chunk with a couple o' dimples and all the signs o' health.
I looked careful into his eyes. They were full o' devilment,
an' he scowled his brows down over 'em when I held him ;
but they were brown like Kit's.

" Oh, he 's too dirty to touch," sez Kit, beamin' all
over with pride. " I just can't keep him clean, try as I
will."

" Be careful, Happy, and don't soil your hands on that
baby ! " yells the Friar as though in a panic. " Let me have
him. I was dirty once, myself."

It was plain to see 'at the kid an' the Friar were old
cronies; and it was a pleasant sight to see 'em together.
The Friar got down on the floor with him an' played bear
an' horse an' the kid entered into it an' fair howled with
merriment. Kit scolded 'em both an' took so much interest
in their antics she hardly knew what she was doin' to the
supper things.

Before long Olaf came in. He still took up all the space
not otherwise occupied; but he had an altogether-satisfied
expression which made ya forget how everlastin' ugly he
really was. He took us out an' showed us the garden, an'
the new wire fencin' an' the baby's swing, an' all the rest of
his treasures. Olaf didn't want any more changes to take
place in the world. If his vote could have made it, things
would just continue as they were until the earth wore out.

THE LITTLE TOWN OF BOSCO 281
It made m feci a little lonely for a moment; but I entered
in as hearty as I could.

Durin' supper I sez to Kit: "Well, Ty Jone» has a
woman, now; and if it improves him as much as it has
Olaf, he may blossom out into a good neighbor to you yet."

" Ty Jones got a woman ! " exclaimed Kit. " Well, I 'd
just like to lay my eyes on the woman 'at would take Ty

Jones."
" Oh, all women ain't so set on havin' a handsome man as

you were," sez I.

" Well, I would n't have any other kind," sez Kit, an' she
gave her head a toss while Olaf grinned like a full moon.

They were both purty well beat out to think o' Ty Jones
havin' a woman, an' we all talked it over durin' the rest o'
the meal. After supper, Olaf took the kid on his lap and sat
by the fire tellin' us his plans, while Kit cleared up the
dishes an' stuck in a word of her own now and again. It was
plain to see 'at she did full as much o' the plannin' as he
did, an' this was probably what made her so satisfied. The
kid regarded Olaf's mustache as some sort of an exercisin'
machine, an' Olaf had to fight him all the time he was talkin',
but he certainly did set a heap o' store by that boy.

He told us he had about sixtv cows and a fair run o' two
an' three year olds with a high average of calves ; but that
he intended to sell the whole run to the Double V outfit up
on the Rawhide, and get a small band of sheep. This flat-
tened me out complete; but he had a lot of arguments on
his side. He was also experimentin' with grain seed which
he had got from Canada, an' he already had a patch of
alfalfa which was doin' fine. He was one o' those fellers
who can't tire 'emselves out, an' so just keep on workin' as
long as the law allows 'em to use daylight. He had a young

■it

282

FRIAR TUCK

Swede workin' for him, but just at that time, he was off
lookin' for the work hosses which had voted 'emselves a
vacation, an' had gone up into the hills.

The Friar wanted to go up into the Basin country next
day, so we bedded down purty early. I lay awake a long
time thinkin' over what a fright Olaf had once been, and how
he had straightened out of it.

Next momin' we started soon after sun-up. The Friar
had a couple o* women runnin' a Sunday School a,t Bosco,
and he wanted to see how they were gettin' along. They had
belonged to his brand of church clear back in Ent^ md, and
he set a lot of store by 'em; but owned up that they had
their work cut out for 'em at Bosco ; it bein' one o* the most
ungodly little towns in the whole country.

We nooned on Carter, slipped over Boulder Creek Pass,
and reached Bosco at sun-down. It alius surprised me to
see how much travel the Friar could chalk up, takin' his
weight into account ; but he was less irritatin' to a boss 'n
airy other man I ever met up with. The more of a hurry
he was in, the more time he took on the bad hills; and he
never robbed a boss by sleepin' an hour late in the mornin',
an' makin' the boss even up by travelin' beyond his gait.

The husband of one o' these women ran a saloon, the hus-
band of the other — the women were sisters — was the
undertaker and also ran a meat market. I thought this
about the queerest business arrangement I had ever been
confronted against ; but the man himself was full as peculiar
as his business.

I have a game I have played with myself all my life. I
call it " why," an' I suppose it has furnished me more fun 'n
anything else has. I take any proposition I come across an'
say all the whys about it I can think up an' then try to

t %i

THE LITTLE TOWN OF BOSCO 283

answer 'em. Why did anything ever happen just as it did
happen just when it did happen? This is the joke o' life to
me. I have played it on myself times without end ; but only
once in a while even with myself can I follow the line back
to common sense.

»■

CHAPTER THIRTY

TY JONES GETS A WOMAN

Bosco was a regular town with twenty or thirty houses, a
post office, two general stores, three saloons, an' all such
things; and right on a good stage road runnin' north an'
south. We stopped with the meat-market undertaker, 'cause
they did n't think it quite respect?' ^^ for the Friar to live
off the profits of the liquor traffic ; though the Friar alius
said 'at he had a heap more respect for a square saloon-
keeper 'n for a sneaky drygoods merchant.

Shindy Smith was the saloon-keeper, an' Bill Duff was the
undertaker. Duff was the absent-mindedest man I ever got
intimate with, an' about drove his wife to distraction, she
bein' one o' these hustlers who never make a false move.
He had the idee that bein' an undertaker took away his license
to laugh, so he alius walked on his toes an' disported as
solemn a face as nature would allow ; but nature had in-
tended him for a butcher, an' had made his face round and
jowly. Whenever he didn't have anything else to do, he
usea to sit down an' practice lookin' solemn. He 'd fix his
eyes on the ceilin', clasp his hands across his stomach, pull
up his eyebrows, droop his mouth, an' look for all the world
like a man dyin' o' the colic.

He was so absent-minded that he 'd raise his cup to take
a drink of coffee, forget what he had started to do, an' like
as not pour it over his flapjacks for syrup. He started to
engineer a funeral once with his butcher's apron on, and

TY JONES GETS A WOMAN 285

they told all sorts of stories about him which was shockin'
to an extent ; though his wife kept such a sharp eye on him,
that I don't believe more 'n half of 'em. Still it was n't any
sort o' business for an absent-minded man to be in.

It was an uncertain business. Of course all lines o' trade
in a thinly settled country go by fits an' starts ; but his was
worst of all. Sometimes he 'd have as many as three funerals
a month, and at others it would take him six weeks to sell
out a beef carcass. A feller who had a spite again' him
started the story 'at he soaked his meat in embalmin' fluid,
an' then if they came an extra special rush in both lines of
his business at the same time, he'd — but then his wife
kept such a skeptical eye on him, 'at I don't believe a word of
these stories, an' I 'm not goin' to repeat 'em. The worst
I had again' him was that he was so everlastin' careless. I
lay awake frettin' about his carelessness till I could n't stand
it a second longer ; and then I rolled up half the beddin' an'
started to sleep on the side porch.

" Where you goin' ? " sez the Friar.

" This here Bill Duff is too absent-minded an' forgetful
for me," sez I.

" What do ya mean ? " sez the Friar.

" Well," sez I, " I don't want to make light o' sacred things,
nor nothin' like that ; but Bill Duff 's got somethin' stored
up in this room which should 'a' been a funeral three weeks
ago, and I intend to sleep outside."

The Friar chuckled to himself until he shook the whole
house; but it wasn't no joke to me; so I shunted the
beddin' out on the roof o' the porch, which was flat, and
prepared to take my rest where the air was thin enough
to flow into my nostrils without scrapin' the lid off o* what
Horace called his ol' factory nerve.

'']

286

FRIAR TUCK

'<'

As soon as the Friar could recover his breath, he stag-
gered to the window, an' sez : " That 's nothin' but cheese,
you blame tenderfoot. Limburger cheese is the food Bill
Duff is fondest of, and he has four boxes of it stored in
this room."

" Then," sez I^ comin' in with the beddin', " I '11 sleep
in the bed, an' the cheese can sleep on the porch; but
hanged if I '11 occupy the same apartment with it." I set
the cheese out on the porch — it was the ripest cheese in
the world, I reckon — and it dre'v all the dogs in town
before momin'. After they found it was above their
reach, I 'm convinced they put up the best fight I ever
listened to.

It took a long time for the memory o' that cheese to find
its way out the window; and I lay thinkin' o' the Friar's
work, long after he had drifted off himself. He was n't
squeamish about small things, the Friar wasn't, and this
was one of his main holts. When we had got ready to eat
that night, Mrs. Duff had tipped Bill a wink to ask the Friar
to say blessin'. Bill was in one of his vacant spells, as usual,
so he looked solemn at the Friar, and sez : " It 's your deal,
Parson." Now, a lot o' preachers would 'a' gone blue an'
sour at that ; but the Friar never blinked a winker.

Then after supper, all the young folks o' that locality had
swooped in to play with him. This winnin' o' young folks
was a gift with the Friar, and it used to warm me up to
watch him in the midst of a flock of 'em. He showed 'em
all kinds o' tricks with matches an' arithmetic numbers, an'
taught 'em some new games, and then he put up a joke on
'em. He alius put up one joke on 'em each visit.

This time he puts a glass of water under his hat, look:
solemn, and sez 'at he can drink the water without raisin'

TY JONES GETS A WOMAN 287

the hat. They all bet he can't, and finally he goes into a
comer, makes motions with his throat, and sez he is now
ready to prove it. Half a dozen rush forward and lift the
hat, and he drinks the water, and thanks 'em for liftin' the
hat for him so he could drink the water an' make his word
good.

Some folks used to kick again' him and say he was worldly ;
but his methods worked, an' that 's a good enough test for
me. He took out the shyness an' the meanness an' the stu-
pidity, and gave the good parts a chance to grow ; which I
take it is no more again' religion than the public school is.
Why, he even taught 'em card tricks.

He could take a deck of cards and turn it into a complete
calendar, leap year and all; and then he could turn it into
a bible, showin' easy ways to learn things, until a feller
really could believe 'at cards was invented by the early
Christians who had to live in caves, as some claim. All the
time he was playin' with 'em, he was smugglin' in wise
sayin's with his fun, pointin' out what made the difference
between deceivin' for profit, and deceivin' for a little joke,
tellin' 'em how to enjoy life without abusin' it — Why, he
even went so far as to say that if a feller could n't be reli-
gious in a brandin' pen he could n't be religious in a cathe-
dral — which is a two-gun church with fancy trimmin's.

By the time he had expanded the young folks and made
'em easy and at home, the older ones had arrived ; and then
he held a preachin'. The whole outfit joined in with the
singin', and when he began to talk to 'em every eye in the
room was glistenin'. You see, he ..new them and their life ;
and they knew him and his. He had nursed 'em through
sickness, he had tended their babies, he had helped to build
their cabins an' turn 'em into homes; so the words flowed

'%■■,

11 -■

288 FRIAR TUCK

out of his heart and into theirs without any break between.
This was the Friar and this was his work — but I can't
put it into a story.

The* was a no-account cuss by the name o' Jim Stubbs
who lived — if ya could call it livin' — at Boggs ; and the
Friar induced him to go along on one of his trips. When
Jim came back he was a made-over man, and every one
asked him if he had religion. " Hell, no," sez Jim, tryin'
to be independent, " I ain't got religion ; but a feller catches
somethin' from the Friar the same as if he had the measles ;
and I don't covet to be a bum no more."

This gives ya the best idy of the Friar that I can think of ;
and I finally fell asleep there at Bill Duflf's, with my mind
made up to bury my own heartache, keep the grave of it
green, but live out my life as hard as the Friar was livin'
his.

We had intended to projcc about in the Basin next day to
rustle up some new trade in the Friar's line ; but my pony
turned up lame, so we held over to get him shod. When the
stage pulled in that evenin', me an' the Friar went down to
see it. A little feller sat on the seat with the driver. His
hat was coveied with dust an' pulled down over his eyes,
an' what ya could see of him was the color o' cofi'ee; but
the moment I lay eyes on his side-burns, I grabbed the Friar's
arm an' whispered, " Horace ! " and by dad, that 's who it
was. Promotheus was in the back seat, an' he looked for
all the world like an enlarged copy, except that his side-bums
were r^d an' gray, while Horace'' were mostly brown. But
they were cut exactly the same, startin' from his ears, runnin'
across his cheeks an' lips, an' then curvin' down to the crook
of his jaw, close cropped an' bristly.

Horace an' Promotheus hit the ground as soon as the stage

TY JONES GETS A WOMAN 289

stopped, an' me an' the Friar dropped back out o' sight in-
side the hotel. Horace gave orders about his two boxes an'
started into the hotel. Just as he came through the door, I
stepped out an' gave him a shove. "You can't come in
here," I growled.

He stepped back as fierce as a rattler. " I can't, huh?"
he piped. " Well, we '11 see if I can't."

Then he recognized me, an' we began to pump hands.
He said 'at he and Promotheus had only reached home three
weeks before ; but they could n't stand it, an' so had made
a streak for the West. He said they had been in Africa an'
India, until they had become plumb disgusted with tropical
heat, an' so had come out the northern route, expectin' to
outfit at Bosco an' ride down to the Diamond Dot.

We suppered with 'em an' next day they bought a string
0' bosses, packed their stuff on 'em, an' said they were ready
for some amusemeht. Horace had got a little snappier in
his talk an' his movements; but that was about the only
change. As soon as we told 'em about Ty Jones havin' a
woman, that settled it. Horace insisted upon seein' the
woman, an' Promotheus echoed anything 'at Horace said,
though his face clouded a bit at the idee of foolin' around
the Cross brand ranch. The Friar didn't feel any call to
go along with us ; but it was more to my mind just then
'n his line was, so I jumped at the chance.

Horace was also n.ghty glad to add me to his outfit. He
had been used to havin' a lot o' Zulus an' Hindus waitin' on
him, and had n't adjusted himself to a small outfit yet. He
said he had sent a lot o' hides an' heads an' horns and other
plunder from London, England, to the Diamond Dot; but
had been too busy to write durin' the past few years. He
and the Friar had quite a talk together before we left ; but

y\\

390 FRIAR TUCK

I could tell from their faces 'at Horace didn't have any
news for him.

We had high jinks when we reached Olaf's; but Horace
did n't make any hit with the kid. The kid had a jack-in-
the-box toy 'at looked consid'able like Horace, an' the kid
couldn't square things in his own mind, to see a big size
one, out an' walkin' about like a regular human ; but when
he also got to study in' Promotheus, he was all undone. Olaf
tried to have him make up to Horace, but he would n't stand
for it. He 'd sit on Olaf's knee and look first at his jack-
in-the-box, then at Horace, and wind up with a long look at
Promotheus. Promotheus would try to smile kind an' in-
vitin', and then the kid would twist around and bury his face
in Olaf's vest. Horace nor Promotheus did n't mind it any ;
but as far as that goes, the kid was only actin' honest an'
natural, accordin' to his lights, an' the jack-in-the-box had
as much of a kick comin' as anybody.

Ty had been down there just the day after we had left,
an' had wanted to buy Olaf's place; but only offered halt
what it was worth. He had done this half a dozen times,
an' alius insulted Olaf as much as he could about it. Olaf
had wanted to sell out at first ; but Kit had been able to see
'at they had a homestead fit for any thing, and she had alius
insisted that they get full price or hang on. Now, it was
improved way beyond common, an' they were both fond of
it ; so they had decided to stick it out.

" This is goin' to be a dry summer," sez I.

Olaf's face clouded up but he only shut his lips tighter.
We told 'em we were on our way up to try an' have a look
at Ty Jones's woman, and Olaf said he 'd go along if he
did n't have to trail his cattle up to the Raw Hide, this bein'
part o' the deal he had made. He said it would take him

TY JONES GETS A WOMAN 391

about ten days probably, an' wanted us to camp in the Spread,
an' keep an eye on his stuff. Olaf clipped the first joint off
o' Promotheus's name, an' I was glad of it.

We chucked our stuff into the barn next momin' an'
started to stalk the Cross brand neighborhood. Horace had
a small field glass which was a wonder, and we worked as
careful as we could. It was only fifteen miles across from
Olaf 's ; but all we were able to do the first day was to find
a little sheltered spot up back o' the ranch buildin's where
we could get a good view of 'em through the field glass.

Next day Olaf an' Oscar started with the bunch o' cattle,
an' we rode along part way with 'em to give 'em a good
start ; but Olaf had handled his stuff so gentle that it was
no trouble, an' we turned back an' took up our watch again.
We watched for a week without seein' a thing, ridin' in
each night to sleep back of Olaf 's shack. Me an* Theus —
I had seen Olaf 's ante an' had raised him one — were gettin'
purty weary o' this sort o' work ; but Horace was as patient
as a spider. Finally though, we got a little more risky,
and leavin' our bosses up in our sheltered spot, we foUered
down a ravine to get nearer to the new cabin.

We had caught several glimpses of a woman to prove to
us 'at the' was one there ; but that was about all, an' so we
went down this ravine, tryin' to figure out what excuse
we 'd give if we came across any of Ty Jones's men. Neither
me nor The — Promotheus had said 'at we could n't be no
politer 'n he could, so he had lopped off the last joint, and
now had as neat a workin' name as any one, although Horace
still insisted on usin' the whole outfit when he had occa-
sion to address him. Well, neither me nor The felt just
easy in our minds at snoopin' about Ty's when we had n't
any business to, especially The; but Horace was as self-

39*

FRIAR TUCK

>i '

composed as though he was hcrdin' lions out o' tall grass,
which it seems had been his favorite pastime durin' the last
few years.

The knew the ravine well ; he said it ran full o* water in
the spring, but after that was dry all the year. We got
about half-way down it, an' then we came to a path "at was
plain enough to see. «e stopped an' wagged his hca<l.
*' No one ever used to use this," sez he.

" Well, some one uses it purtv constant, now," sez I.
** The woman is the one who uses it," sez Horace. " She 's
tonely, that 's plain enough. The path climbs the opposite
bank — let 's cross an' go up."

Me an' The bucked at this for some time: but Horace
hung out ; so we went along with him. We finally came to
a little glen with a spring in it, an' grass, and in a little clump
o' small trees, we came across a book lyin' face down on a
Navajo blanket.
" That 's gettin' r'os ," sez Horace.
" Yes I " sez we, in low tones.

We scouted all around; but no one was there, an' then
we took a line on the hill back of us, picked out a likr ly spot.
and returned the way we had come, this bein' the only direct
way. We did n't meet a soul — at least none wearin' bodies,
though from the creepy feelin' I had part of the time, I wont
ever be certain we did n't meet any souls.

Next day, we circled the peak and got up to the spot we
had picked out. We could see the clump o' trees plain
enough ; and along about three in the afternoon, we saw the
woman come up the path, walkin' slow an' actin' weary. She
had two big dogs with her, and whenever she 'd stop to rest
a bit, she 'd pet 'em. " Well," sez The, " things has chanc d
a heap when ol' Ty Jones stands for havin' his dogs patted."

TY JONES GETS A WOMAN 293

We could n't get a good view of her face from where we
were, btL we could get a fine view o' the ranch buildin's.
The' did n't seem to be much work on hand, and we saw eight
or ten men foolin' around an' pretendin' to do chores. The
recognized the two Greasers he had been ridin' with the day
he had pulled on Horace, and one or two others ; but most
of 'em was strangers to him. He said the Greasers were
about the most devilish speciments he had ever herded with
— an' Ty's whole outfit was made up o' fellers who had
qualified to wear hemp.

Horace was keen to go on down to her an' get a good look ;
but me an' The took the bits in our teeth at this. We knew
what those dogs were like, an' refused pointblank to go
a peg unless he could think up a good enough excuse for us
to give to Ty Jones — and we would n't let Horace go down
alone.

" The best plan I can see," sez I, pointin' to a cluster o' big
rocks down the slope to the left, " is to circle back to those
rocks. We can see her face plain from there when she comes
back the path."

After examinin' this plan we decided it was the best ; but
when we went after our bosses, Horace's had broke his reins
an' gone back through the hills. By the time me an' The
had rounded him up, it was too late, so we had to wait till
next day.

Next day I left the other two at our first look-out and rode
on to the new one. As soon as she came in sight, I waved my
hat to 'em and they sneaked down to the bunch o' rocks. I
rode back an' left my boss with theirs, an' then joined 'em.

She did n't come into view till after ^ve o'clock. When
she reached the edge of the ravine '' started down, «he
paused an' looked off into the valley with her face in plain

294

FRIAR TUCK

view. Horace looked at it through his glasses, gave a start,
and then handed the glasses to The. " Have you ever seen
any one who looked like her ? " sez he.

The looked and broke out into a regular expression.
" That 's the original of the phonograph I had," sez he.

" That 's the Friar's girl, s. e as the sky 's above us," sez
Horace.

I grabbed the glass and took a look. She did look like the
picture, but older and more careworn. Some way I had
alius thought o' the Friar's girl as bein' young and full of
high spirits, with her head thrown back an' her eyes
dancin'; but just as I looked through the glasses, she
pressed her hands to her head, and her face was wrinkled
with pain. She was better lookin' than common, but most
unhappy.

" That devil, Ty Jones, is mean to her ! " I growled be-
tween my teeth.

" Dogs or no dogs, I 'm goin' down to have a talk with
her," sez Horace.

He started to get up, but I pulled him back to the ground.
I had kept my eyes on her, and had seen the two dogs turn
their heads down the ravine, and her own head turn with
a jerk, as though some one had called to her. Horace looked
through the glasses again, and said he could see her lips
move as though talkin' to some one, and then she went down
into the ravine. We could n't see the bottom of the ravine
from where we were, nor we couldn't see the ranch build-
in's; so we hustled back throuq^h some washes to our
look-out, and reached it just as she and Ty came out at the
bottom.

They were walki side by side, but Horace, who was
lookin' through the g 'asse 5aid they seemed to be quarrelin'.

lil

TY JONES GETS A WOMAN 295

" It 's moonlight to-night," sez Horace, " and I 'm goin' to
sneak down and try to see her."

We argued again' it all we could, but he stood firm ; so
ail we conld do was to sit there and wait for the lights to
go out 'I the bunk-house. As she was a reader, we figured
'at she 'vi be the last one to turn in; normal habits an' appe-
tites not havin' much effect on book-readers

\i\

I ^''l

CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE •

JUSTICE UNDELAYED

Human emotions are like docks: some of 'em will run
longer 'n others ; but they '11 all run down unless they 're
wound up again every so often. Even fear will only run
so long, as several late-lamented bullies have been forccil
to learn just before they passed over .he Great Divide. After
you 've scared a feller as bad as he can get, it is well enough
to let him alone. U you keep on addin' horror onto horror,
his fear is likely to run down; and the chances are 'at he "11
get irritated, and slaughter ya.

I don't know whether or not patience can rightly be called
an emotion ; but anyway, mine runs down a little easier 'n
airy other o' my faculties, and sittin' up in the chill an'
waitin' for a lot o' festive fools to go to bed. alius was just
the sort o' thing to disgust me. Those Cross-brandei s
did n't seem to have any more use for shut-eye that night
than a convention o' owls. Some of 'em rode off at dusk.
but more of 'em arrived, and they held some sort of higli
jinks in the bunk-house, till I began to talk back at myself
loud enough for all to hear. It was full moon an' we could
see dogs loafin' an' fightin' down at the ranch, the light in
the new cabin was the first to go out, an' for the life of me.
I could n't see where we had a single pair to stay on ; but
Horace seemed to accumulate obstinacy with every breath
he drew. The sided with me, but criticizin' Horace went

!l I

JUSTICE UNDELAYED 297

again' his religion, so he did n't make pny more uproar than

a gnat fight.

Finally I calmed down until I could stretch each word out
a full breath an' sez in my doviest voice: " Horace, will you
kindly tell me what in hell you intend to do?"

He studied the situation careful, and took all the time
he needed to do it. " I 'm goin' back to camp," sez he.
"To-morrow night they'll be sleepy, and we'll have the
whole place to ourselves."

" Hurrah for hot wtdther ! Greece has finally melted ! "
I yelled, an' we hustled for our ponies.

I have a buck-skin riggin' I put on the bridle of a boss
who gets into the evil way of steppin' on his reins ; and I
had fixed one on Horace's boss to bring him back to his
senses should he attempt to play the same trick he had
worked on us the day before. When a boss wearin' one o'
these contrivances steps on h reins it pinches his ears,
down close to his head where they 're tender, and generally
works a reformation in short order.

We forgot all about this, .ad when Horace jumped into
his saddle, he gave a jerk on the reins -and got bucked
into a clump o' cactus. The boss didn't try any runnin',
though, which proves he had learned a proper respect for
trailin' reins. Still, Horace was n't quite in the mood to see
the beauty o' my method, so he insisted upon my swappin'
bosses with him. It was a good two-hours' ride to Olaf 's,
and by the time we had changed saddles, and I had con-
vinced the pony that his idees of buckin' were childish an'
fu-tile, and his show of temper had only given him a hun-
dred an' ninety pounds to carry instead of a hundred an'
twenty, it was after nine o'clock.
We were hungry enough to call for speed ; but still it

1 1'

■ i

298 FRIAR TUCK

was eleven by the time we reached the Spread. We thought
we had seen a horseman go into it from the other direction ;
but the moon had ducked under a cloud and we couldn't
be certain.

We didn't intend to waken Kit if we could help it; so
we started to put the bosses into the corral as quiet as pos-
sible. Just as we had thrown our saddles over the top bar,
we heard a commotion from the cabin, and started for it
on the run.

There was n't any light in the cabin ; but we heard Kit
screamin', and before we arrived, we saw a man rush
around the comer just as the door was flung open, and two
other men jumped towards him from the inside. These two
had knives in their hands ; and the man outside took a step
back. They rushed him, but he hit one with his right fist,
and the other with his left, and curled 'em both up again'
the side o' the house in a way to make a feller's heart oance
for joy. Then we saw it was the Friar himself, and we
gave a whoop.

Kit had banged the door shut, put up the bar, got a
rifle and made ready for what was to come next; but
when she heard our whoop, she put on her wrapper
and opened the door. The two men 'at the Friar had
crumpled up were those same two Greasers 'at The
had told us were the meanest pair he had ever herded
with.

We took 'em by the heels an' straighened 'em out, while
Kit indulged in a few little hystericals. The Friar had alius
been a great hand to expound upon moral force an' spiritual
force, and such items, and now when the two Greasers
refused to come back an' claim their own bodies, he got a
little fidgetty.

JUSTICE UNDELAYED 299

" Friar," I sez, " I give in to you. Your quiet way o'
lettin' the right work out its own salvation is the surest way
I know ; and in an emergency like this, it docs full as well

as violence."

The Friar wasn't in no mood for hilarity, though; so
after gettin' their weapons an' tyin' 'em up, we soused the
Greasers with water, and brought 'em back to give an ac-
count o' themselves. Kit all the time tellin' us what had
happened.

It seems 'at Kit had been hoein' in her beloved garden
that day an' had been purty tired at night ; so after waitin'
for us until she got exasperated, she had eaten her own sup-
per, put ours on the table, an' turned in. Olaf had put up
another cabin the same size as his first. He had put 'em
side by side with a porch joinin' at their eaves. In one
cabin was the dinin' room an' kitchen, all in one, and in the
other was the bedroom an' settin' room.

Kit had heard a noise in the settin' room and had opened
the door before she was full awake, thinkin' it was the dog
or cat. The minute she had opened the door they had
grabbed her, and she had begun to scream. They shut off
her wind a little ; but they was n't rough with her — quite
the contrary. They leered into her eyes, and patted her on
the shoulders, and made queer, gurglin' noises in their dirty
brown throats; but they didn't speak to her, not one
word.

Kit was strong, an' she had fought 'em to a standstill for
what she thinks was twenty minutes, at least ; but she was
beginnin' to weaken. One of 'em kept his arm about her
neck, and whenever she tried to scream, shut oflf her wind.
She had heard the Friar's boss nicker when he opened the
first pole gate, and this provided her with enough moral

N ;

I 'I

300

FRIAR TUCK

courage to sink her teeth into the wrist of the arm about her
neck. The feller had give a yell, and struck her; but at
the same time, she had opened up a scream of her own which
loosened things all over the neighborhood.

The Friar had first put for the settin' room door ; but they
had locked this door on the inside, intcndin' to go out the
side door. He savvied this so he dove into the porch-way
between the two cabins, and made a rattlin' on this door.
They had paused at this ; but he had to rattle several times
before they took down the front bar. We had been fordin'
the crick about this time.

The Greasers had tried to get out the window once ; but
Kit had called out what they were up to; so they had turned
on her an* choked and beat her scandalous.

This was Kit's side, and by the time she had finished tellin'
it, the Greasers had begun to moan an' toss. The Friar gave
a sigh of relief, as soon as they came to enough to begin
grittin' their teeth. I sat 'em up with their backs again' the
side of the cabin, and intimated that we were ready to receive
their last words.

We had to encourage 'em a bit, one way or another ; but
we finally got out of 'em that they had poisoned the dog,
and then cut a crack in the door till they could raise the
bar. They said 'at Ty Jones had n't had no hand in plannin'
their trip; but had offered 'em a hundred apiece if they
could put Olaf in the mood of wishin' he had sold out

peaceable.

" Well," sez I, as soon as they were through, " shall we
finish with 'em to-night, or give 'em till to-morrow to

repent ? '

" We shall of course deliver them to the proper officials to
be tried by due process of law," sez the Friar.

JUSTICE UNDELAYED 301

" What for? " sez I. " Ya never can tell how a trial will
turn out; but we know 'at they have forfeited the right
to live ; so we '11 just give 'em what they 've earned and save

all fuss."
" No good ever comes of men taking the law into their

own hands," sez the Friar firmly.

"How come, then, that you didn't run an' tell some
justice o' the peace, 'at these two snakes was actin' disre-
spectful—instead of knockin' 'em up again' the logs?"

sez I.
" I should have done so if I had had time," sez the Friar

with dignity.

" Well, you 're better trained 'n we are," sez I ; " but it
still takes a little time for you to make your hands mind your
self-control, after you've been het up. You can do it in
ten minutes, say ; but it takes us about a week, and by that
time the' won't be any need for the law."

" No," sez the Friar, " I insist that we rely upon the law.
We count ourselves as of the better element ; and the most
vicious conditions arise when the better element takes the
law into its own hands. When a vicious man does illegal
violence, it roes not establish a precedent; but when the
decent man does the same thing, it tears away forms of
civilization which have taken centuries to construct."

" That sounds like sense," sez I ; " and after this is all
over, I don't mind arguin' it out with you ; but right now,
it would seem to me that if we went to law about this, it
would be because we wanted to shoulder onto the law the
responsibility of doin' what we feel ought to be done, but
which we have n't the nerve to do ourselves."

" If yoti attempt to lynch these men, I shall ride at once
and give the alarm," sez the Friar.

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302 FRIAR TUCK

" And when you came back, you would find 'em swingin'
from a limb," sez I. " I 'm with you in most things, Friar,
and if the' was a shred o' doubt, I 'd be with you in this ;
but it 's too plain a case. I 'm willin' to hold these two in
secret until we can collect a posse o* twelve to give 'em a
jury trial ; but this is the most I '11 do. Ty Jones has got
others of his gang away from the law, but he don't get
these two — not if I can help it."

Horace sided with me, and so did The, though he did n't
have much to say. He was thinkin' of his own trip to pester
Olaf, and it came back to him purty strong. The Friar
finally had to agree not to notify the law until I 'd had time-
to gather up a posse. I made Horace promise not to tell
the Friar aboUv our seein' the woman back at Ty's, saw that
the Greasers were planted safe in Olaf's log barn, and sot
out at once for the Diamond Dot on a fresh boss. I never
want to eat none before startin' a ride like this.

I rode all that night through the moonlight ; swingin' up
over the passes, fordin' the rivers, and reachin' the Diamond
Dot at noon the next day. I did n't let on to Jabez 'at I was
there at all ; but I got Spider Kelley, ol' Tank Williams,
Tillte Dutch, and Mexican Slim to take a vacation and come
on back with me. This gave five for the jury, as 1 did n't in-
tend to have Horace or The sit on it, not knowin' how far
their prejudice might prevent 'em from executin' my idee
of justice. We set out to return, about five o'clock, and rode
into the Spread at seven the next mornin' with eight other
fellers we had brought along for good measure.

Old Jimmy Simpson and his four grown sons were in
this bunch, and I was purty well acquainted with 'em. I
knew 'at they had been amply pestered by Ty Jones's outfit,
and would n't be too particular about what book-law might

JUSTICE UNDELAYED 303

have to say on the subject, though ol' man Simpson was up
on book-law. The other three were fellers they knew and
were willin' to guarantee. We were all a little sleepy, so
we decided to hold the trial after dinner.

The Friar had spent as much time with the Greasers as
they 'd stand for ; but he had n't made much impression on
'em. I knew 'at he was heart-whole in his attitude, an' I
hated to cross him; but this was a case o' principle with
me, so when we got ready for the trial, I tried to get him
to take a long walk, but he refused.

We held the trial in front o' the barn, and it was as legal
as any trial ever was, and as solemn, too. We untied the
prisoners, and called Kit for the first witness. She told it
just as she had told it to us, but her bruised face would
have been all that was necessary. Then we called the Friar
and he told his part, and we let him make a speech in favor
o' law and order; and cheered him hearty, too, when he
got through.

I had just begun to give my part, when Olaf and Oscar
rode up. Olaf sat on his boss and looked at us a moment,
at Kit with her bruised face, holdin' the boy in her arms,
at the prisoners and us ; and then he asked the Friar what
it all meant. The Friar was sunonomous with truth, as far
as Olaf was concerned.

Olaf listened quietly, the dark red risin' in his cheeks
bein' about the only change in him. When the Friar
finished, Olaf got off his boss. " The' won't be need of any
more trial," sez he. " Kit, you go to the house."

Kit started for the house, and the Friar asked Olaf what
he intended to do.
" Kill 'em," sez Olaf, " with my two hands."
He unbuckled his belt and threw it on the ground, then

304 FRIAR TUCK

kicked off his chaps, and stepped through the ring we had

formed. " Stop," said the Friar. " Olaf, I forbid this."

" You had better go to the house. Friar." said Olaf with
pleadin' in his voice. " Go in — please go in — an' comfort

Kit."

The Friar made a rush, but we fended him off. The
Greasers also tried to make a get-away; and between the
three of 'em we were some busy ; but it did n't last long.
When the Greasers saw they could n't break our ring, they
turned on Olaf like cornered rats. They struck him ati.l
they choked him; but not once did he speak, and whenever
his grip closed on their flesh, he ruined that part forever.
It was a horrid sight; but I couldn't have turned my eyes
away if I 'd wanted to. In the end he broke their necks,
one after the other, and then he stood up straight and wiped
his forehead. " I take the blame," said he. " I take all the
blame, here and hereafter"; which certainly was a square
thing to do, though we had n't counted on it, any.

CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

THE FRIAR GOES ALONE

The Friar had been in earnest tryin' to get to Olaf ; so 'at
the four Simpson boys had finally been forced to throw, an"
sit on him. As soon as it was over, they got up and apolo-
gized, offerin' to let him take out any spite on 'em he saw
fit, and promisin* not to feel any ill-will; but the Friar
was n't angry. He was hurt and sad to think 'at we 'd do
such a thing ; but he had no resentment towards us.

" I know most of you men well," said he ; " and I know
you have done this because you felt it was right. I don't
put you on one side and myself on the other. I take my
full share o' the blame. It merely proves that my influence
with you during the many years we have been together has
not been for the best, and I am very sorry to learn how poor
my work has been."

He turned and went up to the house; and we all felt
nearly as bad about the way he had taken it as though the
confounded Greasers had got away altogether. We talked
it over and finally loaded their bodies into Olaf's wagon,
and hauled 'em up on the rim, where we buried 'em and
heaped a lot o' stones over 'em. We began to feel better
after this, and shook hands all around, and the Simpsons
and their three friends rode away.

Then we told the others about havin' seen the Friar's girl
at Ty Jones's and held a council as to how we should tell
him. We finally delegated Horace to do it, though he was n't

306 FRIAR TUCK

ambitious for the job. The Friar had told Kit that it was
all over, and had left to take a walk without eatin' an;
supper. Wc still felt purty low-spirited, and we did n't cat
much ourselves; though we felt certain he wouldn't bother
his head much about a couple o' Greasers, as soon as he
found out his own girl was Ty Jones's woman.

The boys had come light from the Diamond Dot, but
Horace had outfitted way beyond his needs, intendin* to do
consid'able campin' around, and Olaf also had a couple of
extra tarps and plenty o' bcddin' ; so we fixed up our old
bunk-shack which had been left standin', and settled down
as though the interval between our previous visit hadn't
been more 'n ten days.

The Friar came back about ten o'clock. He came into our
shack as quiet as he could ; but Horace was sittin' before the
fire waitin' for him. It was a warm night; but we had
built the fire to make it a little more cheerful, and had left
the door wide open. Horace saw the Friar the minute he
reached the doorway, and he got up and went outside with

him. ,

They were gone nearly an hour, and then Horace sneaked
in, and wakened me up. I follered him outside; and he
said that the Friar intended to ride down to see Ty Jones
as soon as it was day, and that he insisted on ridin' alone.
The Friar was walkin' up and down in the moonlight, his
face was all twisted up, through his tryin' to hold it calm.
when I took my turn at reasonin' with him; but it wasnt

any use.

" Well, you '11 not go alone." I said at last ; " and you can
make up your mind to that now. We don't know how much
Ty already knows about our puttin' the Greasers -at o the
game and we don't know how much of it he '11 lay to you;

I 'J

THE FR!\R GOES ALONE 307
but we do know that he hates you, and would wipe your
name off the list the first K(H)d chance he had. I 'm goin'

along."

The Friar was hot; we stood there in the moonlight
facin* each other and takin' each other's measures. He was
a shade taller and some heavier 'n I was ; and ya could see
'at he'd have given right smart to have felt free to mix
it with me. "Do you think I'm a baby?" he burst out.
" Do you think 'at I "m not fit to be trusted out o' your sight?
You take entirely too much on yourself, Happy Hawkins! "
I did n't want to taunt him to hurt him — I 'd rather been
kicked by a boss than to do this — but I did want to arouse
him to a sense o' the truth. " You have adjusted yourself to
this locality purty well. Friar," scz I ; " but the's still a lot
you don't quite savvy. Some cases must be settled by a
man himself, but some must be left to the law. If ^^is
woman is the wife o' Ty Jones, he has the law on his side."
He turned from me and stamped off into the night with
his h:mds clenched. He disappeared in the cottonwoods,
and I was just beginnin' to wonder if I had n't better foUer
him, when he came back again. " Oh. I 've been a fool,
I 've been a fool ! " he cried. " All my life I have tried not
to judge others, but all my life I have judged them. I
have tried to put myself in tl ir place, but alius I judged
and condemned them for giv^g way to temptations which
I felt that I, in their place, could have resisted. I have been
a fool, and I still am a fool. I admit that you are right, and
I am wrong — but, I am going to Ty Jones's at dawn, and
I 'm goin' alone."

Well, that settled it — me an' the Friar had to buck each
other again. He continued to stalk up an' down through
moonlight and shadow ; while I tried to plan a way to head

! ,

hi ;ii

308 FRIAR TUCK

him off. I was dead sleepy, but I went around and wakened

up all the other fellers, and told 'em not to get up in the

mornin' until called; next I got Tank to help me, and we

waited until the Friar had walked in the opposite direction.

and then we took the ponies out o' the corral and headed 'em

toward the hills. The farther we got, the rougher with 'em

we got, and then we turned our own mounts loose, and sent

'em after the bunch. It was a big job to pack our saddles

back on our heads, but we did it, and tore down the fences

to pertend 'at the ponies had vamoosed on their own hook.

Horace was walkin' with the Friar now, arguin' the benefit

of a little sleep, so 'at he'd be at his best. After a time

the Friar did go to bed in Horace's tarp in the comer.

I didn't wake up till after seven, myself, and all the
fellers were pertendin' to sleep as though it wasn't more'n
three. The Friar did n't wake up till eight. He was beside
himself when he found the ponies gone; but he ate break-
fast as calm as he could, and then set out with us to wrangle
in some bosses on foot.

Coin' after bosses on foot is sufficiently irritatin* to a
ridin' outfit to make it easy enough to believe 'at this was
all an accident, and we did n't come up with the ponies till
nearly noon. When we cornered 'em up, I never in my life
saw as much poor ropin', nor as much good actin' ; but we
finally got enough gentle ones to ride bareback, so we could
wrangle in the rest; and after a quick lunch, the Fnar
started to make his boss ready.

We all started along with him. He stopped and faced
on us, givin' us a long, cold look-over. You can say all you
want to again' swearin', but the's times when it springs out
of its own accord in a man. as natural and beautiful and
satisfyin' as the flowers blossom forth on the cactus plants;

THE FRIAR GOES ALONE 309
and I have n't a shred of doubt that if the Friar had handed
us some o' the remarks that came ready-framed to his tongue
just then, they'd have been well worth storin' up for future
needs; but all he did was to fold his arms, and say: " Your
methods are not my methods. I am not goin' there to start
trouble, and I do not even wish to give them the slightest
excuse to start it of their own vo-lition. If you are my
friends, you will respect my wishes."

" Well, but you '11 take at least one of us along, won't ya,
Friar? " sez ol' Tank. " Likely as not we would n't take it
up, nohow; but still if they made away with ya, we 'd sort
o' like to know about it as early as possible, in order not to
feel suspensed any longer 'n was necessary."

" I should like to take one man along as a guide, as I am
not entirely familiar with the trail from here," sez the Friar,
still talkin' to us as though we were a lot of evil-lookm'
strangers. " If one of you were to go along until we came
within sight o' the ranch buildin's- No, they might see
him and get the idee that he had gone back to join a reserve
body, and I do not wish them to have the slightest grounds
for resorting to force on their side. I shall have to go

alone." ^^ x L-

" I can see what you 've been drivin' at, now," sez Tank,
whose face was so muddled up that no one ever tried to read
his thoughts in his features, and so he could lie with mi-
punity. " Yes, I can see what you mean, now, and I got to
own up 'at you 're right about it. Still, you know. Friar,
we're bound to worry about ya. How long do you want
us to wait before we start to projectin' around to get some

news of ya?"

A look of relief came to the Friar's face: "Why, if I
don't come back within a week," sez he, "I haven't any

3IO

FRIAR TUCK

objections to your notifyin' the legal authorities that you
fear something has happened to me — but don't make much
fuss, foi it does n't really matter."

We all kicked about waitin' a week, but finally compro-
mised on five days as bein' about the right interval to allow
before notifyin' the legal authorities. Then we advised
the Friar to go down by the ravine as it would take him to
the ranch by the back way where he would n't be so likely
to attract attention, especially from the dogs.

He asked Horace to ride with him until he could get a
landmark ; so Horace flung his saddle on a boss an' started
along, while the rest of us made ready to go trout-fishin',
or take a snooze, or shake the cards, accordin' to the way
we generally amused ourselves when loafin'. The Friar
turned back once on the pretense that he wanted to get a
good drink o' water before startin* ; but he found us scat-
tered out peaceful an' resigned, so he headed away at good
speed.

Horace took him the open road, while we went mostly
through cuts, the way we had alius gone to our look-out.
Our way was some the longer; but we pushed our bosses
a little more, and made the look-out just as the Friar reached
the point where the path went down into the ravine. Horace
had agreed to do all he could lo get the Friar to go up
to the clump of bushes where the woman spent her
afternoons, though he said he doubted if the Friar would
do it.

I had the field glasses with me, and kept 'em on the Friar's
face when he paused to examine the spot and make sure he
was right. He could n't see the ranch buildin's from where
he was, nor the path leadin' to the clump of trees. I could
see his face plain through the glasses, and he had taken the

J
a

THE FRIAR GOES ALONE 311

guy ropes off and let it sag into just the way he felt. It was
filled with pain an' sufferin'.

As soon as Horace came, he and I sneaked down to the
bunch o' big rocks from which we could see the path as it
dipped from the opposite edge of the ravine, leavin' the rest
of the boys to watch the ranch buildin's. We could see them
from where we were, and they could see us, and we had a
signal for us to come back, or them to come to us ; and an-
other that the Friar was gettin' it bad down below, and to
make a rush for him. We had n't seen any one about the
buildin's, except the Chinese cook. Our plan was to not rush
the buildin's right away, unless we saw the Friar gettin' man-
handled beyond his endurance. Horace said 'at the Friar
had refused to go ,0 the clump o' trees to see the woman,
as it might give the impression that she had sent word to
him to meet her there, and he wouldn't cast the slightest
suspicion upon her name.

" Horace," I said, as an awful fear struck me, " supposin'
after all, it ain't the right woman ! "

Horace's eyes stuck out like the tail lights on a freight
caboose. " Oh, I 'm sure it 's the same woman," sez he.
" Course she 's changed some ; but we could n't all three
be mistaken."

" I still think it 's the same woman," sez I ; " but as far
as all three not bein' mistaken, the's nothin' to that. Half
o' the fellers who make bets are mistaken, and most of us
make bets. Still I think she 's the same woman."

In spite of this doubt, I was feelin' purty comfortable.
The other time we had been there, I hadn't been able to
think up any excuse as to why ; but this time I felt I was
in right and it left me free to enjoy the prospects of a little
excitement. I alius try to be honest with myself ; and when

312 FRIAR TUCK

I 'm elated up over anything, I generally aim to trail back
my feelin's to their exact cause. I 'm bound to admit that
when I 'm certain that any trouble likely to arise will be
thrust upon me in spite of my own moral conduct, I alius
take a pleasant satisfaction in waitin' for it.

The Friar slid his boss down the bank o' the ravine, and
disappeared just a few moments before we saw the woman
comin' along the path from the clump of trees. We kept
glancin' up at the look-out now and again, but mostly we
glued our eyes on the woman. Horace hogged the field
glasses most o' the time, but my eyes were a blame sight
better 'n his, so I did n't kick about it much.

When she reached the edge o' the ravine, she paused and
gave a little start. " Does she know him, Horace ? " I sez.

" She don't seem to," sez Horace. " She 's speakin' down
at him ; but her face looks as though she did n't know him."

"If it 's the wrong woman," sez I, " I 'm goin' to start
to the North Pole to locate the fool-killer."

While I spoke, she started down the path slow and matter
o' fact; and me an' Horace scuttled back to the look-out
to be in time to see 'em come out at the bottom — providin'
the Friar went on with her.

We did n't get there more 'n two minutes before they came
out at the bottom ; bnt it seemed a week. When they finally
came into sight, the Friar was walkin' an' leadin' his hoss,
and she was walkin' at his side about four feet from him
with a big dog on each side of her. Just then we saw six
Cross-brander,, ride in toward the corral.

" It looks calm an' quiet," drawled ol' Tank, his free eye
bouncin' about like a rubber ball ; " but I '11 bet two cookies
again' the hole in a doughnut that we have a tol'able fair
sized storm before momin'."

CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

THE FRIAR GIVEN TWO WEEKS

As Friar Tuck and the woman came out of the mouth of the
ravine, Ty Jones came out of the back door of the old cabin.
He stopped a moment, lookin' at 'em, rubbed his eyes an'
looked again. Then he walked towards 'em. He spoke
somethin' to the Friar, and the Friar answered it. The
woman did n't pay any heed at all ; but went around the
new cabin to the door which was on the other side. Three
more Cross-branders rode in, and Ty Jones shook his fist

at the Friar.

or Tank was cussin' under his breath for comfort, but it
did n't keep him from gettin' fidgetty. " Is n't the' no sort
of a tool, Horace," he blurted out, " that '11 stretch out your
hearin' the way these field glasses stretch out your eye-
sight? I 'd be willin' to have one of my ears run as wild as
my free eye, fore-"*' after, if it could just hear, now, what
Ty Jones is a-speat. .1' to the Friar. I 'm beginnin' to get
nervous."

We all felt about the same way; but it was about two
miles down to where they were, so all we could do was to
watch.

Olaf had come with us, leavin' Oscar with Kit, and now
Horace turned to him and said: "You and Promotheus
know more about Ty Jones 'n the rest of us. I have never
tried to pump Promotheus. but now I want you to tell us
what you think he '11 do with the Friar."

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314 FRIAR TUCK

They said 'at Ty was generilly purty cold blooded, and
likely to take enough time in j^ettin' rid of a feller to make
it purty hard to tell just how it had been done; but that
when he once let go of himself, he didn't care what hap-
pened, and if the Friar angered him about the woman, the
chances were 'at the Friar would never leave the ranch alive."

The shadows were beginnin' to fall, down in the valley;
but Ty and the Friar kept on talkin', Ty wavin' his hands
now and again, while the Friar stood straight with his hands
hangin' easy at his side. I could n't stand it any longer.

" I believe 'at a feller could get almost to 'em without
bein' seen, by goin' along the edge o' the ravine," sez I;
" and I 'm g.-in' to do it. It '11 be dark in a few minutes.
If you want me to hustle to the Friar, wave a torch up and
down ; if you want me to come back here, wave it sideways."

" I 'm goin', too," sez Horace.

" So 'm I," sez Olaf and The.

" Well, that 's full enough," sez I, " and the rest of ya keep
a sharp watch, and also keep the bosses ready, in case we
need 'em."

The four of us started down the side o' the slope at good
speed. There were only two places on the way down where
we caught sight o' the ranch buildin's ; but just before we
reached the top o' the cliff, we heard a sound down below in
the ravine. Glancin' cautious over the side, I saw the Friar
comin' back alone, on foot and leadin' his boss.

I drew back and whispered to the others, and we felt
purty blame cheap. We hardly knew what to do, as the
Friar was likely to see us if we tried to run back to our
look-out before he reached the place where the path came
up out o' the ravine, and most of all, we did n't want him to
know 'at we were foUerin' him.

THE FRIAR GIVEN TWO WEEKS 315

He had passed us by this time, so we looked over the
edge o* the ravine at him. He was walkin' slow with his
head down, and his hands in his pockets. " He '11 ride
home slow," sez I ; " and we can easy beat him."

" Hush," sez The, draggin' us back from the edge,
" the's two fellers foUerin' him."

" Horace," I said, quick and firm, so as not to have any
back-talk, " you go about forty yards up the ravine, and keep
your eyes on these fellers. Don't shoot 'em unless they try
to pass you. Hurry, now ! I 've given you the most im-
portant post. If you shoot, shoot in earnest."

Horace stooped over and ran to where a rock jutted out.
" Now, then," sez I, " as soon as these fellers pass us, we '11
try to bowl 'em over with one stone each, and then drop
back out o' sight. We don't want to shoot unless we have
to."

" They 're wavin' us to come back," whispered The, who
had took a glance at our look-out.

" Never mind," sez I, lookin' down and seein' the two fel-
lers crouched over and sneakin' after the Friar. " Now
then, throw and drop back."

We stood on our knees, threw one stone each, and dropped
back. They rattled in the ravine below, and we heard a
sharp yelp of pain. I had only dodged away from the edge
of the ravine and ran to where Horace was.

" One feller was hit in the shoulder and knocked down,"
sez he ; " but he got up again right away, and both of 'em
ran back."

" What did the Friar do ? " I asked, not darin' to look
over, lest he see me.

" He turned around and started back," sez Horace. " I
was afraid he 'd see my head again' the sky, so I pulled it

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3i6 FRIAR TUCK

back. I have n't heard him move since those fellers started

to run."

" Well, I don't believe 'at even the Friar would be daffy
enough to go back," sez I ; "so we '11 just lay here and
listen. They signalled us from above a while back, but
they 've stopped again."

We waited some time without hearin' any one pass us,
and then we sneaked up along the edge of the ravine. Be-
fore long we saw the Friar come up the side. He paused
on top and looked back, then mounted and started for Olaf's
at a slow shuffle. As soon as he was well under way, we
pushed for the look-out, and mounted.

" Slim, you and Tillte would n't be missed as soon as the
rest of us; so you trail the Friar, while we try to beat him
home," sez I. " If you need us, shoot. Otherwise come in
as unnoticeable as you 're able."

We reached Olaf's, had our saddles off and the bosses
turned loose before the Friar rode in. His face was white,
but this was the only thing 'at showed what he was goin'
through. We made a big fuss about his gettin' back all
right and asked him plenty o' questions, without overdoin'
it enough to make him suspicious. He answered our ques-
tions right enough, but he didn't open up and talk free.
Slim and Tillte joined us at supper without bein' noticed.

After supper we gathered around the fire in Olaf's settin'
room, and the Friar gave us a purty complete account of
what had happened. He said that it was his old girl all
right; but he said that the' was somethin' the matter with
her, that she did n't recognize him even after he had made
himself known to her. He said she seemed dazed-like and
not to take any interest in anything.
He said they had walked down the ravine together, and

THE FRIAR GIVEN TWO WEEKS 3^7
she had told him that she was comfortable enough but not
happy. That she had lost something which she could not
find; but that she was getting stronger since havin' come
out to the mountains. He said 'at when Ty Jones saw 'em
together, he had carried on somethin' fierce, and had ordered
her into the house. Then he had turned on the Friar and
told him that he would give him two weeks to leave the state
and after that his life would n't be safe in it. He said he
had tried to reason with Ty ; but it was n't any use ; so he
had just come away.

"If he had set upon you, would you have shot him?"

asked Tank.

*' I did n't have anything to shoot him with," sez the Friar.
" I was careful to leave my weapons behind."

" Well, you did n't show much judgment in doin' it," sez
Tank. " He might have sent a couple o' fellers after ya, and
finished you out in the dark somewhere so 'at we never
could 'a' proved it on him."

" I did think for a minute that some one was foUerin' me,"
sez the Friar. " I heard a rattle of stones and a cry a few
hundred feet behind me in the ravine ; but I think it was
some animal slippin' down the side."

" Like as not," sez Tank. " If it had been any o' Ty's
gang, they would n't have give it up so easy ; but another
time we '11 some of us go along with you ; so as to get your
last words anyhow, if so be 'at you 're bent on suicide. What
do you intend to do now ? "

" That 's the worst of it," sez the Friar. " I don't know
what to do. She said she did not think she was married ;
but she was not sure ; and Ty refused to give me any satis-
faction about it."

" Is n't the' any law out here, at all ? " sez Horace. " Seems

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to me as though there ought to be some way to get at Ty
Jones."

" What would you charge him with ? " asked the Friar.
" She is not being abused or kept a prisoner, she says she
is comfortable and gettin' stronger — I can't think of any
way to bring him under the law. If you had not taken the
law into your own hands in regard to his two men, we
might have made the claim that he was behind them in this ;
but really, I do not see where we have any just grounds to
go to law."

" That little matter o* the Greasers don't hobble us none,"
sez ol* Tank. " Don't you get the idee that you 're bound in
any way by this. The whole country would uphold us ; so
if you want to use it as a lever, just make your claims again'
Ty to the law officers, and we '11 tell 'em 'at the Greasers con-
fessed 'at Ty put 'em up to it."

This seemed to us like sage advice ; and we all chipped in
and urged the Friar to act on it. Laws are all right, I have n't
a word to say again' laws. Fact is, I believe 'at we 're better
off for havin' a few than not ; but after all, laws come under
the head of luxuries like diamonds and elevators and steam
heat. We all know there is such things, and we haven't
any objections to those usin' *em who can aflFord it; but
most of us have to wear cut-glass, pack in our own wood,
do our climbin' on foot or hossback, and settle our troubles
in our own way with as little bother as possible. When you
figure it down to the foundation, laws depend on public
opinion, not public opinion on laws; and all the public
opinion worth takin' into account would have said 'at we
had done the right thing with those Greasers. If they 'd 'a'
tried to law us for a little thing like this, it would have
started an upraisin' which would have let the law see how

THE FRIAR GIVEN TWO WEEKS 319

small a shadow it really does throw when it comes to a
show-down.

The Friar didn't answer us right away, and when he
did, it was in the most discouraged voice I 'd ever heard
him use. " I 'm in the dark, boys," sez he, " I don't know
what to do. Even if I could find some way to take her
away from Ty Jones, I do not know what to do with her.
She is not herself, she needs care and protection — and
I am not in a position to supply them. I have an income
of three hundred and fifty dollars a year, which is much
more than enough for my own needs, for I live mostly upon
the hospitality of my friends as you well know " — we also
knew 'at he spent most of his money in helpin' those
who never saw enough money to get on intimate terms with
it; while all they gave him in return was a little meal and
bacon for savin' their souls and doctor-bills. " I don't know
what I could do for her, even if I had the right to take her
away from him," continued the Friar. " My life has been
a good deal of a failure ; and I — "

" For the love o' common sense, Friar ! " broke in Horace.
" You don't seem to have the smallest degree o' judgment.
You know mighty well 'at I 'm bothered to death to know
what to do with my money. You get her if you can, send
her to any sort of a sanitarium you want to, and I '11 foot
the bills. Don't you ever sit around and whine about money
in my presence again. It worries and disgusts and irritates
nie — and I came out here for rest. You talk about faith
and takin' no heed for the morrow, and such things; but
you act as though you were riskin' a man's soul when you
gave him a chance to be of some little use in the world."

The Friar was purty well overcome at this; but figure
on it the best we were able, we could n't see just how to

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320 FRIAR TUCK

get a man's wife away from him without provin' that he had
abused her. It was a complication, any way we looked at
it ; so we all went to bed in the hope that one of us would
have a lucky dream.

We did n't have any more idees next morniii' than we 'd
had the night before; so after breakfast, the Friar took a
walk and the rest of us sat around in bunches talkin' it
over. About ten o'clock a feller named Joyce who lived
about fifteen miles east of Olaf came by on his way for a
doctor, his boy havin' been kicked above the knee and his
leg broke. The Friar could patch up a human as good as
any doctor ; so we went after him, knowin' that this would
be the best way to take his mind off his own troubles, and
the' was a look o' relief iu the Friar's face when he rode
away with Joyce.

I never knew any feller yet who didn't spend a lot o'
time wishin' he had a chance to loaf all the laziness out of
his system ; but the fact of the matter is, that work gives
us more satisfaction than anything else. A wild aii nal's
life is one long stretch after enough to eat ; but he *s full 0'
health an' joy an' beauty. On the other hand, put one in
a cage and feed it regular and it turns sick immediate.
What we need is plenty o' the kind o' work we are fitted
for — this is the answer to all our discontented feelin' ; and
what the Friar was best fitted for, was to help others.

CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR

A CROSS FOR EVERY MAN

Thinkin', just plain thinkin', is about the hardest work the'
is; and for the next several days, we lay around doin'
mighty little else. The trouble was, 'at we could n't devise
a way to put Ty Jones out o' business. He was n't an out-
law ; fact was, he stood high with the big cattle men ; and
we got light headed tryin' to scare up a plan which would
remove Ty in a decent manner, and leave the Friar free
to take the woman without causin' him any conscience-
pains. We were the mourn fulest lookin' bunch o' healthy
men ever I saw ; and finally I decided to loaf with Kit and
the kid, they not bcin' expected to do any thinkin' and there-
fore havin' smooth an' pleasant faces.

Sometimes I wonder if women don't get along just as
well without thinkin' as men do with it. I hadn't talked
seven minutes with Kit before she suggested just what I
would have thought up if I *d been able. She did n't even
know she had suggested it ; so I did n't call her attention
to it for fear it might up-heave her vanity and give Olaf
bother, I had a plan now and it was of such a nature that
I was glad the Friar was n't there to mess into it.

I found Promotheus an' Tank lyin' on the grass along the
crick. They were back to back, and their faces were so
lined with genuwine thought, that they looked like a pair
of overgrown nutmegs. I sat down beside 'em lookin'
worried.

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FRIAR TUCK

Presently Tank sez: "What ya thinkin' about?"

I shook my head, and in about half an hour The asked
the same question. I waited a minute, hove out a sigh, and
sez : " Gee, I wish I was you."

" Why do you wish you was me ? " sez he.

*' 'Cause," sez I, " you 've gOt a chance to do the biggest
deed I know of."

" What is it?" sez he, examinin' my face to see if I was
sheepin' him.

" No," sez I, shakin' my head ; " I ain't got any right to
even think of it, let alone hint at it. You might think
I was buttin' into your affairs, and then again — No,
I refuse to suggest it. If it 's your duty, you '11 see it
yourself; but I won't take the responsibility of pointin' it
out."

" What in thunder did you mention it at all for, then ? "
sez The, gettin' curious an' exasperated.

" And then besides," sez I to myself, out loud, " there 's
Horace. Like as not he would n't allow you to run your
head into danger any more."

" What ! " yelled The. " Did n't we run our heads into
danger all over the tropics of the Orient, didn't we goad
up danger an' search for it and roust it out of its hidin'
places and — Why, confound you — "

In about ten minutes I stopped him, an' sez in a quiet
voice : " Well, then, if I was you, I 'd go on down to Ty
Jones's and take on with him again."

We lay on the grass there, along Pearl Crick for some
time without speakin'. Up on the rim, the grass was burned
to a crisp ; but along the crick it was still green. Promo-
theus pulled blade after blade of it and chewed 'em up in
his mouth, while me an' Tank watched him.

A CROSS FOR EVERY MAN 323

" What you mean, is for me to take on with Ty Jones —
and then to act spy on him. Ain't that what ya mean ? " sez
The after a time.

I 'd 'a' sooner he had n't put it into words — it did look
rather raw when he stood it up before us naked. " I don't
mean nothin' in particular, The," sez I. " You and I are
different, and what I could do without feelin' — "

" That 's all right," he broke in. " The' ain't any need
to treat me like an infant baby. Come right out with it —
What you want me to do is to play spy, ain't it? "

" That 's the only way I can see to help the Friar," sez I ;
" but he would n't want you to do anything for him you
didn't feel was right."

" I kn' w, I know," he sez, lookin' down at his hands,
" Ty Jones is as mean as a snake, and I don't deny it ; but
he 's been square with me, and once he saved my life. Then
again, the Friar has been square with every one, and if he
hadn't nursed me night and day, Horace wouldn't have
had a chance to save my life. If Horace had killed me it
would have spoiled his life ; so that the whole thing is held
together in a tangle. I 'm willin' to cash in my life for the
Friar — it ain't that — but I do hate to turn again' Ty Jones
underhanded."

" Better just forget I mentioned it," sez I.

" No," sez Promotheus, " I intend to lay the plan before
Horace, and let him settle on it."

" That 's a good schenje, that 's the best way out of it,"
sez ol' Tank, and I joined in with him.

We sat there on the bank a long time, thinkin' the thing
over, and finally just before supper, Horace hove in sight
and started to josh us ; but when he saw how sober we were,
he settled down, and asked us what was up.

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324 FRIAR TUCK

" Horace," sez The, " what would you think of my takin'
on with Ty Jones, and playin' the spy on him ? "

"That would be madness!" exclaimed Horace. "He'd
see through it and kill you first pop. I don't know though
— you might fix up a tale — but then it would be too infer-
nal risky. Nope, don't you try it."

" If it could be done," persisted The, " what would you
think of it?"

" Oh, it would be a great thing for the Friar," sez Horace ;
" but, Promotheus, I don't like to have you take the risk."

" It ain't the risk I 'm fussin' about," sez The. " Ty was
square to me in his own way. The Friar has been square
to me also, and I know 'at his way is the best; but at the
same time — don't you think it would be downright snakish
for me to go back to Ty, tell him some excuse for my stayin'
away, and then plot again' him while I 'm eatin' his vittles ? "

It didn't sound good to us when Promotheus came out
with it so everlastin' unpolluted; but he had worked up a
sense of honesty since bein' with Horace, which wouldn't
let him do any pertendin'. Horace didn't answer, and he
went on after waitin' a minute: " I haven't any prejudices
again' fightin' him in the open; but it does go again' my
grain to wear a dog hide when I 'm playin' wolf, and Ty
Jones was square to me."

" Well," sez Horace, " I have n't the heart to advise you
to do this, Promotheus. We'll sure be able to find some
other way, and as long as it goes again' your grain the way
it does, I don't want you to do it."

"Would you think any the less of me if I did?" asked
The, his eyes takin' on a sad, hungry look, like a dog's eyes
get when he 's worried over what his master '11 say about
some trick he 's been up to.

A CROSS FOR EVERY MAN 325

"Course I wouldn't think any less of ya," sez Horace
without hesitatin' ; " but hang it, I 'm afraid somethin' 'U
happen to ya."

" Would the Friar think any the less of me? " sez The.

" If the Friar heard about it, he would n't let ya go," sez
Horace.

" I 've puzzled more about the Friar 'n about airy other
man I ever saw," sez The, thoughtful. " I wanted to lynch
Olaf that time, guilty or not guilty ; but the Friar straight-
ened things out by riskin' his own soul. He hates lynchin',
it goes square again' his grain ; but he made a bet with us
to help stretch Olaf if we could prove him guilty ; and this
has stuck with me. This was a big thing to do, and I 'd
like to do somethin' big for the Friar — But I swear it
would hurt me to spy on Ty Jones ! "

We didn't have anything to say on the subject; so we
just sat and chewed grass.

" I 've been thinkin' about that old Greek feller, 'at you
named me after," sez Prometheus at last. " He did n't ask
no one else to take the responsibility of tellin' him what to
do. He just decided what was right, and then did it. If
I go to Ty Jones, and he treats me right, my own thoughts '11
tear at me like vultures ; but this here other Promotheus, he
stood it, 'cause it was for man's good ; and I 'm game to
do the same.

" I don't intend to be any more sneakier 'n I have to be.
AH I intend to do is to find out what I can about the woman,
and, if Ty ain't treatin' her right, to help get her away from
him ; but I want it understood right now that I 'm not goin'
to work any tricks on Ty to get him into the law for
what he 's done in bygone days. Now then, I take all
the blame on my own shoulders ; but we '11 have to fix

326 FRIAR TUCK

up a tale to fool a wise one, 'cause Ty won't be took in
by chaff."

We talked things over a long time ; but it seemed mighty
unreasonable for Promotheus to have pulled out without
sayin' a word, and then to come back without writin' in the
r. eantime ; and we could n't quite hit on it. Finally the idee
came to me.

" They 're goin' to graze the grass down to the roots, this
summer,"' sez I; "but still, the' won't be enough to go
around. A lot o' cattle will have to be sold off early, and
some will be trailed up into Montana, and cow-punchers are
goin' to Le in demand. Ty is long on cattle and short on
grass, and he '11 be glad to have extra help he can trust ; so
he won't question ya too close. You tell him 'at Horace here
was a government agent, and that he arrested you as a de-
serter, and took you to prison where you was given a life
sentence; that you broke out a couple o' months ago, and
have been workin' your way back as cautious as you could."

" My Lord, I hate to tell him that ! " sez The. " It 's too
infernal much like what I told him the first time."

■' You got to make up a good story, or else give up your
plan," sez I.

"Yes, that's so," he agreed. " Ty 'd believe that, too.
What prison had I better say I 've been in ? "

" Which one was you in ? " sez I.

" I never was in any government prison," sez he. " I was
in a state prison."

" Have ya ever seen a government prison ? " sez I.

" Yes, I 've seen two, one in Kansas, and one in Frisco,"
sez he.

" Which would be the hardest to get out of?" sez I.

" The one in Frisco ; it 's on an island," sez he.

'i J-

A CROSS FOR EVERY MAN 327

" Oioose that one," sez I ; " and make up your escape just
as it might have happened."

"Ty won't haggle me with questions," sez The sadly.
" He '11 just believe me, an' this '11 make it ten times as hard."

" You ought to be paler an' more haggard," sez I ; " but I
doubt if the's a way to do it."

" Keep soakin' his face in hot towels for a few days," sez
Horace. " That 'U bleach him out."

" Are ya goin' foot or hossback ? " sez I.

" I stole a boss down in Texas the last time I came," sez
he, " and traded him off when he got footsore."

" We got some bosses with a Nevada brand, over at the
Dot," sez I. " I '11 slip over an' get one while you 're bavin'
your complexion bleached off. They broke out an' got with
the herd before we finished brandin' 'em, and we just let it
go. The chances are they have n't been rebranded yet."

" All right," sez The. " If I 'm to do it at all, I want it
to go through ; but I have an idee 'at those vultures pickin'
at my liver are goin' to be mighty unpleasant company."

Me an' Spider Kelley, Tillte Dutch an' Mexican Slim rode
over to the Dot and found two o' those Nevada bosses, still
rangin' with their old brands untouched ; so we roped one,
and came back with it, without havin' word with any of the
outfit. The Diamond Dot range was the best of any we rode
over, and they had put up a lot o' hay that summer; but
still I felt sure 'at they would have to cut down purty close,
though I knew 'at Jabez would hold as many as he could
for a high price the foUowin' year.

We found The's complexion purty well stewed out and
haggard. Kit havin' put soda in the hot water ; so I told him
to play sick, and loaf around the house as long as possible.
He agreed to it ; but the* was a settled look o' regret in his

338

FRIAR TUCK

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face which was a heap different from the one he had wore
when he dismounted from the stage at Bosco.

" Night and day," sez I, " the'll be at least two of us at
the look-out, and you come up with any news you have.
Get into the habit of whistlin' Horace's tune; so that if
ever you 'd want to warn us to vamose rapid, you can whistle
it. You might ride that way with some o' Ty's outfit, or
somethin'."

" It 's not likely," sez he. " The's no range up that
way, and no trail leadin' near it; but you fellers want
to scatter your tracks all you can, so as not to make a
path."

We made plans for all the unexpected details we could
think up; and then he started forth one night, meanin' to
circle to the southwest, and come in from that direction. He
wore a red handkerchief under his nose as if to shut out the
dust; but shaved clean, and pale as he was, mighty few
would have recognized him either as Badger-face, or as the
feller what had come in with us a few weeks before. We
all shook hands solemn when he left, and promised to be at
the look-out the foUowin' night, and to be there steady from
that on.

" What makes you fellers trust me ? " sez he just as he
started. " I came down here to put Olaf out o' business,
and then I turned over to your side. Now I 'm goin' back
to Ty's. What makes you think I won't turn again' ya, if
I get into a tight place ? "

Horace went over and took his hand. " Promotheus," sez
he, " I 've been with you through hot days and cold nights,
I 've been with you through hunger and thirst and danger ;
and I 'd trust you as long as I 'd trust myself. You 're not
goin' to Ty's because you 're a traitor. You 're goin' because

A CROSS FOR EVERY MAN 339

you 're a changed man, and the new man you 've become is
willin' to risk his life for what he thinks is right. No matter
what happens, I '11 trust ya ; so take that along to think
over."

Promotheus winked his eyes purty fast, then he gave a
sigh and rode oflF into the night. The' was n't the hint of a
smile about his lips, nor a glint o' gladness in his eyes ; but
somethin' in the straight way 'at he held his back let ya
know 'at the inside man of him was finally at peace with
what the outside man was doin' — and if ya don't know what
that means, the's no way to tell ya.

K t

k t]

;!(

"'I

II'

CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE

THE FRIAR A COMPLICATION

We all felt purty down-hearted after Promotheus had rode
away, and we sat before the fire in Olaf's settin' room a
good deal the same as if we were holdin' a wake,

" Olaf," I sez, " you can't have any finicky notions about
treatin' Ty Jones square, after all the persecutin' he 's handed
you. Do you know anything on him you could have him
sent to prison for ? "

Olaf shook his head. " He 's too clever to get caught in
a trap," sez he. " He scarcely ever gave any orders to have
things done. He 'd just say aloud as though talkin' to him-
self, that some one or Qther was in his way; and then his
men would begin to take spite on that feller. If the,calf tally
showed a hundred percent increase, he would think that
about right, and no questions; but if ever it fell short o'
what he expected, we had it to make up some way. He 'd
send us out until we had brought in enough to satisfy ; but
he 'd never give us straight orders to rustle. He is a smart
man. When one of his men got into trouble, he got him out.
no matter what cost; but he expected his men to do what
he wanted, without askin' questions. He has no fear, none
at all. I know, I have seen. He has no fear, and he is very
strong. It is bad to be at war with him ; but I should like
to have my hands at his throat once, and none to interfere."

" Maybe you will, Olaf," sez I, " maybe you will ; and I
don't mind sayin' that I hope to be on hand to see it."

■m
1

THE FRIAR A COMPLICATION 331

We kept two men alius at the look-out with Horace's
field glasses. It was a queer sort o' summer, the air was n't
clear like it usually is, but hazy, as though full o' dust ; and
in lots of places they were turnin' stock on the grass they
generally aimed to save for winter. There were only a few
punchers around the Cross brand ranch houses ; but we saw
Promotheus every day. He hobbled about with a stick part
o' the time, holdin' his hand on his back as though he had
the rheumatiz, which was natural enough from bein' shut
up in an island prison. Some days we saw the woman ; but
she never came up the ravine path any more.

Promotheus did n't make a report to us for about a week.
Then he came out one night about eleven. He said 'at Ty
had n't doubted a word he 'd said ; but had done everything
possible to make him comfortable, tellin' him to just loaf
until he got in good order. He said 'at Ty and the woman
didn't have much to do with each other and hadn't had
since she 'd come out. He said 'at the woman was kind to
all the animals, in spite of everything 'at Ty could do, and
the dogs was gettin' to act like regular, ordinary dogs. He
said all but a few new pups had remembered him, and one
had even wagged his tail, though he could n't see any sense
in this, he never havin' as much as spoke a kind word to the
dog, so far as he could recollect.

He said he had held several talks with Ty, and Ty had
asked him if he thought 'at Olaf was in league with any big
outfits. He said 'at he had told Ty that he was sure Olaf had
been in league with 'em several years before, but o' course,
he could n't know anything o' what had happened since. Ty
said he had come to the conclusion that Olaf was set out for
a kind of bait to draw him into trouble, which was why he
had let him alone ; but that he was short o' grass this season,

■ -',1

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,;.

332 FRIAR TUCK

and wanted Pearl Crick Spread bad. He also told The
about the two Greasers disappearin', though he W3 n't sure
what had happened to 'em. He knew about us bein' over at
Olaf's off and on, and The warned us to be careful, as Ty
expected to have Olaf's place watched as soon as he got
through movin' several bands o' cattle.

The said 'at the woman had a soft spot for any dumb brute,
or even a human in distress, and that he had touched her by
hobblin' around with the stick. He said she had cooked him
some flabby invalid-food with her own hands, and that it
was mighty captivatin'. He said she didn't speak much;
but he was tryin' his best to get on the good side of her. He
said 'at all the boys claimed 'at Ty treated her well; but
did n't seem to care much for her. Horace did n't happen
to be with us when The came ; but we said we 'd move our
camp higher up on the slope, to be on the safe side when
Olaf's was watched, and would have Horace on deck sure
the next time The came out ; and we did this the next day.

The land was all slashed an' twisted around and broken,
up west o' the Cross brand ranch houses. The ravine leadin'
down to 'em ran east and west, the path leadin' up out of it
to the trees where we had first seen the woman was n't near
so steep as the one comin' out of it on the north side toward
the clump o' rocks. After the north path came out, the
ravine narrowed down until it was n't more than a crack, the
south side not risin' so high as on the north ; so that soon
the north side stood up like a cliff above the land leadin'
down to the clump of trees, and the only way we could get
over to it was to go down the ravine and up again on the
other side.

We made our camp consid'able higher than our look-out
had been, and it was a well sheltered spot. An easy slopin'

THE FRIAR A COMPLICATION 333

itretch led up to it from the north, and a ledge skirted the
face o' the cliff up back of it, to the south. We examined
this some distance; but it didn't seem to lead anywhere.
We found several dips back in the hills where the snow
water made grazin' for our ponies, and we were as comfort-
able as it 's ever possible to be while waitin'.

I know what my plan would be for makin' a hell which
would be punishment for any mortal sin, and yet not severe
enough to make me hate all the peace out o' my own exis-
tence. I 'd make the wicked sit in the dark for a hundred
years, waitin' to hear what their sentence was. Then, I 'd
let 'em into heaven, and I bet they would be in a fair way
to appreciate it. I never met up with any one able to out-
wait me without showin' it more 'n I did ; but I '11 wager
what I got, that the suspense was gorin' into me worse 'n
into them, all the time.

One evenin', me an' Tank went up to camp after doin' our
stunt at the look-out, and as we went, we caught sight o' two
riders headin' our way. We hastened along so as to be ready
to move in case this was a pair we did n't care to draw to ;
but by the time '.ve reached camp, they were close enough to
recognize as the Friar and Olaf . The plan was to keep the
Friar in the dark as long as possible, and we waited their
comin' with consid'able interest.

The Friar had squeezed the whole thing uut of Olaf, as
we might have known he would. You could n't trust Olaf
with a secret where the Friar was concerned. Tank, now,
would have sent the Friar off to Bo 00 or Laramie as con-
tented as a bug; but just as soon ns Olaf was backed into a
comer, he told the truth, and spoiled all our arrangements.

The Friar rode into our camp, dismounted, threw his
reins to the ground, and sez : " Where is Promotheus? "

, I

334 FRIAR TUCK

We looked at Olal, and he nodded his head as sheepish as
the under dog at a bee-swarmin'. " He 's down at the
ranch," ser Horace.

" Has he brought any news ? " asked the Friar. So we
told him all "at The had reported. He took a few steps up
and down, ponderin*.

" I can't permit this," l.o said after a minute. " He is
riskin' his life do\ •> there, and I can't allow him to
continue."

The rest all joined in and argued with him ; but he was
as obstinate as a burro, once he got his back up ; so I did n't
say anything. I went off and started to eat my supper.
When I was about half through, Horace came over and said
the Friar was bent on goin' down to Ty's himself. " Well,
let him go," sez I as cool as a snow-slide.

" Yes, but if he goes, Ty will kill both him and Promo-
theus I " sez Horace raisin' his voice. I noticed the others
headin' toward us so I only flung my hands into the air,
meanin' that it -.as none o' my business.

" Do you mean to say 'at you back the Friar up in this? "
demanded Horace.

" Do I look like a fool? " sez I. The Friar's eyes were on
me, and I knew they were cold; but I pertended not to
notice him.

" You don't look like a fool ; but you act like one," sez
Horace, gettin' riled.

" You can't blame me, Horace," I sez in my most drawly
voice, " because the Friar cares more for havin' his own way
than he does for human life."

*• What do you mean by that? " demanded the Friar,
" Oh, nothin'," sez I, " except that if you go down there,
it shows Promotheus up at once, we 'd all have to go along

THE FRIAR A COMPLICATION 335

to save Prometheus, and this would start a fight, with us to
blame ; and no one knowin' what the woman is, or how sh»
stands in the matter. She seems perfectly satisfied witli
Ty Jones ; and no matter how it turned out, all of us who
survived would have to leave the country. I don't intend
to argue with you, or to cross you in any way; but I do
intend to stand by Promotheus, as it was me who first put
the idee into his hca*! "

I sympathizeo wi; ' ;hc F: ar, j Vnew that he wasn't him-
self. To fino tuc wom^.j he lovcci in the hands of the man
who hated hini. rtftcr all t'le >eai le had been in suspense
about her was mou^h ^o rip an; jne off his balance; and
I also kne / the F'-iar 4e had ij-ained himself for eternity
so long that sjr.t oi } ib rarthl) idees weren't sound, and
the surest way to b-'t:-: hu i to himself was to let him bark
his knees a time 01 Sow c imported bosses carry their

gaze so high they can't see their footin' but after they 've
stepped into a few prairie-dog holes, they learn to take a
little more interest in what they 're treadin' on.

The Friar came over and looked down at me. " I shall
wait until Promotheus comes up here, and then he can stay ;
and I shall go down," said the Friar in the voice a man uses
when he thinks it 's wrong to show the sarcasm he can't help
but feel. " Have you any objection to this? "

" I have no objection to anything you choose to do, Friar,"
I said, finishin' my supper.

" Do I understand that you approv ' " sez he.

" Certainlee not," sez I. " Ty would see the connection
between you and Promotheus at once. He knows 'at The
was a deserter, and he would set the law on him in one direc-
tion, and try to run him down on his own hook in the other.
If you had been on hand while we were discussin' the plan,

\:i

336 FRIAR TUCK

you would have had the right to veto it; but now, it looks

to me as though Promotheus was the one to consider."

The Friar sat down and ran his hands through his hair.
" I can't see any way out! " he sez at last ; " but I 'm forced
to admit that since Promotheus has gone down there, it
would put him in danger for me to interfere."

" Well," sez cl' Tank, " here is The himself. Now, we '11
know better what to do."

We looked up, and there was Promotheus with a bruise
over his eye, comin' into our little nook.

CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX

A SIDE-TRIP TO SKELTY'S

We all crowded around him, thinkin' 'at the bruise betokened
some sort of trouble ; but he said he 'd got afraid they 'd
begin to suspicion him ; so he had tried to ride a boss that
day, and had let it buck him oflF. He said the' was n't much
lettin' needed, as it had been a mean one ; but he had got
his forehead grazed, and had lain on the ground, claimin'
his back was hurt. It was only about eight o'clock, and we
wondered how he had the nerve to come so early; but he
said they were bavin' a drinkin' bout over havin' dogged a
feller by the name o' Bryce off his claim on Ice Crick, thus
gettin' a new outlet to grass and water.

He said the woman had been mighty good to him after
his fall; but that he couldn't get her to talk about herself
at all. " Have you ever mentioned the name of Carmichael
to her?" I asked.

" No," sez he, " why shorld I? "

" That 's the Friar's name," sez I. " He used to preach in
a regular church down east, and she sang in the choir. Next
time you get a chance, try to draw her out about this."

The Friar told him a lot o' small details to ask her about ;
and went part way back with him, as he would n't stay long
for fear o' bein' missed. The Friar insisted on stayin' along
with us, while Olaf went back to the Spread.

Two nights after this Promotheus came up to our camp
again. He said he had had several talks with her, and that

■■ Hi

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338 FRIAR TUCK

she remembered the names and places, all right, but insisted
that Carmichael was dead. She said he often came to her
in her dreams ; but that she knew he had died long ago.
" Does she ever sing? " asked the Friar.
" Never," sez The. " She don't even talk much. She has
some sort of a pain in her head, and sometimes she seems to
wander ; but at other times she is perfectly clear."
" Is Ty Jones ever mean to her ? " asked the Friar.
" Never," sez The. " Ty ain't mean to those about him.
He has his own idees — he likes to have his men and dogs
and bosses all fierce and nervy — but he 's not mean to 'em.
And all the boys treat her respectful, too. Fact is, I don't
see where we got any grounds to take her away."

" But she does not care for him," sez the Friar ; " she
could not care for him ! He must have used trick or force
to bring her here ; and you must find out the truth about it.
It all depends on you, now."

" I 'm doin' all I can. Friar," sez The; "but it's a hard
tangle to see through."

When he left to go back, me an' the Friar and Horace
went with him. " Supposin' they should see you comin'
back?" sez the Friar.

" Well," sez The, " Ty don't keep his men in prison, and
I 'd tell 'em, I was up takin' a little air after bein' shut away
from it so long."

"Supposin' they got suspicious an' foUered ya?" asked
the Friar.

"I try to be as careful as I can," sez The; "but I
own up I alius feel a bit nervous till I get back to my
bunk."

" The best plan is for one of us to wait where the path
leads down into the ravine each night at eleven," sez the

h'f

A SIDE-TRIP TO SKELTY'S 339

Friar. " We could go at ten and wait until twelve. If we
went any closer, the dogs might get scent of us."

We agreed 'at this would be the best plan ; and after this,
two of us made it a point to spend a couple of hours waitin'
there, while the rest stayed at the look-out ready to hustle
down if the' was any excitement ; but nothin' happened and
we got purty fidgetty.

" Tank," sez I one afternoon, " let 's ride over to Skelty's.
The's generally some Cross-branders there, and perhaps we
can find a little amusement."

We reached there about seven, and ordered supper. There
were five Cross-branders there already, eatin' and drinkin' ;
and one of 'em was the tall feller by the name o' Dixon. I
nodded to him when I sat down and he nodded back. It 's
funny the way a man feels when he goes into an unfriendly
place to measure an' be measured. It 's not like fear, that
is, not like panicky fear; but still I suppose it's something
like what a jack-rabbit feels when the hounds are strung out
after him. He knows well enough what '11 happen if he
can't run fast enough — but then he takes a heap of exhilar-
ation in the thought that he most certainly can run fast
enough.

All those fellers knew something o' me an' ol' Tank ; while
Dixon was the only one we knew, the rest bein' mostly young
chaps who had taken on with Ty durin' the last few years ;
but as most o' Ty's m n were trailed out o' some other state
by a posse, it was a safe bet that they had more or less rattler
blood in 'em. They were all on friendly terms with the girls,
and the girls called 'em by name, whenever they could n't
think up some other term 'at suited their taste better. One
o' these young fellers still had a boy's eyes ; but most o' their
eyes were purty hard an' chilly.

340

FRIAR TUCK

li «

I never did set any store on havin' a strange woman call
me " dear " ; and neither did ol' Tank. With his eye runnin'
wild, and his mussed-up features, the term dear fitted him
about as snug as false bangs an' face-powder would; but
one o' these young hussies came over an' stood behind his
chair, and sez : " Why hello, dearie, where have you been all
the time?"

" I 've been over teachin' my grandchildren how to play
the pianer," sez Tank. "Have you got any pork an'
beans ? "

Most any girl knows 'at most any man '11 stand for most
anything ; so this one grabbed hold o' Tank's hair and gave
it a pull ; but she savvied 'at he did n't have any love for her,
so she brought in his grub, threw it down in front of him.
and went back to soft-soapin' the feller with a boy's eyes.
He was still young enough to feel flattered by it, and truth
to tell, she was n't a bad lookin' girl, except that she drenched
a feller so constant with her feminine charms that she washed
away any hankerin's for 'em he might have had to begin

with.

Any healthy woman has all the allurement she can possibly
need, if she '11 just take care of it. I like to see a boss full
o' fire, and I like to see a woman full of enticement ; but I
like to see both the fire an' the enticement kept under good
control, and not made to show out unnecessary.

Once, when I was in Frisco, I saw a parade of the Friendly
Order of Hindu Cats, and the Grand Thomas Cat o' Creation
rode in front on an old gray boss. This boss had feet like
worn-out brooms, and the' was knots all over his legs. All
he asked in the way of entertainment was to pass a peaceful
day in a quiet stable, face to face with a bale of hay ; but
they had clipped his mane an' tail, hung a beaded belt across

A SIDE-TRIP TO SKELTY'S 341

his brisket, put a scarlet blanket on him, and jabbed him
with spurs until he was irritated to a degree.

The feller ridin' him had learned to ride in a barber's
chair ; but he had a heavy frown, and a lot o' gold lace, and
a big canoe-shaped hat ; and I have to admit that if they had
tied him fast to the saddle, and put rubber spurs on him, he
would have looked the part like a picture. Every time he 'd
see one of his friends he 'd stab the boss on the off side, then
jerk back on the curb, and smile benevolent, as though he
intended to save the populace from that liery steed or sprain
every bone in his face.

The old gray was as forgivin' a boss as I ever see ; but
he had his limits as well as the rest of us. For the first ten
or fifteen blocks, he 'd only swish his tail and prance when
his rider jabbed him an order for a little more fire; but
finally his flanks got touchy, and his sense o' justice began
to write the declaration of independence on his patience.
This would have been the time an intelligent human would
have traded off his spurs for an apple or a lump o' sugar, or
some other welcome little peace-offerin' ; but just then the
parade passed under a window jammed full o' the Grand
Thomas Cat's closest friends, and o' course, they had to see
a little fire.

He straightened out his legs, and then clamped the spurs
into the old gray's flanks. I had fought my way through
the crowd for fifteen squares just to see it happen, and it was
well worth it. The gray was stiff and awkward, but in his
youth he had taken a few lessons in buckin', and what he
lacked in speed and practice, he made up in earnestness. The
Thomas Cat did n't know any more about balancing than a
ball, and the grip of his knees would n't have put a dent in
a pullet's egg ; the' was no horn to the saddle, and the mane

111

< ■:■..

SaKg^l£¥^^^^aS?^ . :,^S4^ffS/i

342

FRIAR TUCK

had been clipped, so all he had to hang on with was the spurs
and the curb bit; and things certainly did happen.

The old grzy pitched and kicked and reared and backed
and snorted and got mixed up with flags and citizens and
umbrellas and red-lemonade stands and policemen; until
finally he scraped off the Grand Thomas Cat of Creation on
an awning, and tore off home, jumpin' and kickin' ; while the
population threw their hats in the air and yelled their palates
loose. They threw fruit and popcorn and friendly advice
at the Grand Cat as he hung from the awning ; but friend
or foe, the' was n't a soul in that crowd to help him get down ;
so as soon as he got calm enough to remember what he was,
he dropped the three feet to the sidewalk, and ran into the
store and hid.

If ya want to fill a crowd with content and satisfaction and
joy and felicity and such-like items, just have some terrible
accident happen to a popular hero, and all the joy-wells '11
overflow and gush forth like fountains — But what mado
me think o' this little incident was the fact that this girl at
Skelty's put the spurs to her feminine charms a leetle too
continuous.

Dixon, the Cross-brander, was one o' these lean, skinny
ones, and as a rule, I don't crave to make their acquaintance.
His Adam's apple ran up and down in his neck like a dumb-
waiter, and the' was plenty o' distance for consid'able of a
run. If ya looked at just the part of him between his chin
and his shoulders, he resembled an ostrich, chokin' on an
orange ; but I decided to be as friendly as possible : so as
soon as I 'd filled a cigarette paper, I offered him my sack o'
tobacco. He took it, and while he was roUin' himself a cigar-
ette, he sez : " I see you 've cut loose from your preacher."
" Nope," sez I, " he cut loose from me."

A SIDE-TRl P TO SKELTY'S 343
"How come you fellers spend so much time out this
way?" sezhe.
" Nice country and pleasant folks," sez I.
" I 've heard tell 'at you got so familiar over at the Dia-
mond Dot, that the old man turned ya loose," sez he. " Is
the' anything to it ? "

I did n't reply at once. My first impulse was to sec if I
couldn't pull him and his Adam's apple apart; for this
was n't no accident. This was a studied insult, and every
one there was watchin' to see what would happen ; but the'
was too much at stake ; so I gripped myself until I had time
to put that remark where it would n't run any risk o' spoilin' ;
and then I sez : " Well, I don't just like to have it put that
way ; but I will admit that you have n't missed it so terrible
far."
*' Lookin' for a job? " sez he.

" Oh, I 'm not carin' much," sez I. " I 'm thinkin' some
o' takin' a homestead, or buyin' some other feller out ; but I
ain't in any hurry. I may go on down into Texas, or take
on again up here. Any chance for a job with your outfit ? "

Durin' the time I had been decidin' on what I 'd say, Dixon
had been wonderin' how I 'd take it ; and I don't doubt he
was some relieved. Anyway, he thawed out a little. " Nope,
I hardly think so," sez he. " We 've been hard pushed for
grass this season ; but Ty bought a water-right on Ice Crick,
and things has smoothed out again. Another thing is, that
Badger-face has come back."

I gave a start as natural as life, and I did n't put it on,

neither. I had no idy he'd mention Badger-face without

a lot o' pumpin' " Badger-face? " sez I. " Good Lord, I

thought he was dead! "

" Well, we thought so, too," sez Dixon. " We had n't

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344 FRIAR TUCK

heard a word from him ; but he showed up a while back, and

as soon as he gets able, he '11 take to ridin' again."

" What 's wrong with him ? " ser I.

" He 's purty well played out," sez Dixon. " He sex 'at
that feller, Bradford, is some sort of a government agent.
Now, we ain't got nothin' again' the government out this way,
so long as it minds its own business ; but when it gets to
interferin' with our rights, wny it generally has to find a
new agent. You were along with this feller, Bradford, when
he scooped in Badger-face ; and I doubt if that has slipped
Badger's mind yet. Badger's memory for such things used
to be purty reliable."

"Well, if it comes to that," sez I, "I'd rather have
Badger-face on my trail than Dinky Bradford; though I
own up, I don't just know what government position Dinky
holds."

" or man Williams there was along with ya, too, was n't

he ? " sez Dixon.

" Sure he was," sez I. " We got a heap better paid, for
that trip 'n we usually get."

" Yes," sez he, slow an' drawly, " but a feller can never
tell when he 's all paid out for such a trip as that."

" A feller has to take chances in everything," sez I. " I
still got a little money left to amuse myself with."

" It dcm't seem to make ya reckless," sez he. Dixon had
been drinkin' purty freely, and I rather liked the eflFect liquor
had on him.

" Maxwell," I called, " this is a dry summer. Set up the
drinks for the house." Some saloon-keepers fawn on ya as
if they 'd melt the money out o' your clothes while some of
'em are cold and haughty, as though it was an insult to offer
'em money. Maxwell was one o' this kind. He glared his

A SIDE-TRIP TO SKELTYS 345
red eye« at me as if I 'd been rude ; but he set out the drinks
all right.

Tank had been shut away from drink for so long that I
had plumb forgot how he had happened to win his title ; but
as soon as I had give the order, I sensed that he was in the
mood to sluice himself out thorough. The very minute we
had cooled off from the drinks — Maxwell kept a brand o*
poison which would eat holes in an iron kettle, if you let
it set five minutes — Well, the very instant the steam had
stopped comin' out of our mouths. Tank ordered a round ;
and before that had got on good terms with the first drink,
Spider Kelley had arrived.

Mexican Slim had guessed where we were headin' for, and
Tank had owned up to it, and Slim had told Spider, and, o'
course. Spider had n't been able to stay behind ; so when he
stuck his nose in the door, Tank sez 'at the drinks was always
on the last-comer, and Spider ordered a round.

I can journey about with a fair amount o' booze, without
lettin' it splash over into my conversation ; but I was there
on business, so I drank as short drinks as would seem so-
ciable. Tank, on the other hand, had formerly been as im-
mune to liquor as a glass bottle ; but he was out o' practice
without realizin' it; and he splashed into Maxwell'* forty-
rod as though he was a trout hurryin' back to his native
element. Spider was a wise old rat, and he played safe, the
same as me. O' course, the Cross-branders could n't stand
by and see us purchase Maxwell's entire stock, without
makin' a few bids themselves ; so for a while, we peered at
the ceiling purty tol'able frequent.

The young feller with the boy's eyes was chin-ful to begin
with, the other three Cross-branders were purty well cal-
loused to a liberal supply o' turpentine ; while Dixon would

I -1

I |{ s

346 FRIAR TUCK

load up his dumb-waiter and send it down as unconcerned
as though his throat was a lead nipe, connectin' with an irri-
gation ditch. He had reached the stage where he was reck-
less but not thoughtless, and the didn't seem any way to
wash him down grade any farther.

" Any more o' you fellers liable to drop in? " sez he, lookin'
at me. I waved my hand towards Spider, as though he, bein'
the last to arrive, would have the latest news; and Spider
sez: "Nope, I reckon not. Leastwise, not so far as I

know."
•• Badger-face has come back and taken on with Ty again,"

sez I.
•' The hell he has! " exclaimed Spider, just as I knew he

would.

" Yes," sez Dixon with an evil chuckle, " he 's come back,
and I doubt if he 'd feel any sorrow at meetin' up with some
o' you boys."

" As far as I remember," sez ol' Tank, bulkin' up as pon-
derous as a justice o' the peace, " I don't recall havin' asked
Badger's permission to do anything in the past, and I don't
intend to begin now."

" Well," sez Dixon, " I don't mind tellin' ya that Ty Jones
ain't so sure o* Badger as he used to be ; and nothin' would
suit him so well as to see Badger cut loose and get some 0'
you fellers for helpin' to have him railroaded."

This surprised me. Dixon did n't seem a shade worse 'n
he 'd been when Spider arrived, but he 'd sure enough
leaked out the news I was after. Ty was suspicious o' Pro-
motheus, and we 'd have to finish our job as soon as pos-
sible. I did n't want to start anything at Skelty's so I pro-
posed a little friendly poker. The Kid was asleep in the
comer; so the seven of us played stud for an hour or so

A SIDE-TRI P TO SKELTY'S 347

until Tank fell out of hit chair, and then we broke up for the
night

Tank was all in ; so we had to put him to bed, and the Kid
had to be put to bed, also ; but Dixon and the other three
took a final drink and started back to Ty's.

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CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN

PROMOTHEUS IN THE TOILS

Tank weighed like a beef when he «■«, «'l"»;-'~«' l^""
was all me and Spider could do to get h.m to bed. His legs
:"e i^e rubber' but he insisted on tellin- us what he
ftought ab. ut things. He begged us to surt back and let
Se. sayin' thafi. was only the heat o' the room, no. Ae
dik" which had upset him; but he was in no shape to nde
a hav waeon, SO we put him to bed. ^

"I think more o' the Friar than of airy oth^ man I
know "he sez to us at the head o' the stairs; " but I own up
'rr don't take kindly to religion; and I'H tell ya why.
The's hundreds an' dozens of hymns to the doggone sheep-
^rdtrs; but the' ain't one single one to the cow^unchers
Now, what I sez is this, if ya want to round me up ma reU
gion, you got to find one 'at has hymns to cattle men.

We did n't bother to explain it to him, 'cause he was n un
condtion to know a parable from a pair o' boots^ W
draeged him along the hall and flung h.m on h.s bed. By
'ranfe we put him on the bed with his lx>ots on ft. p.Hen
tZ wen! sound asleep the moment he stretched out; so
t" iust tang his hat on his toe, folded the blanket over h.m
Sed th^ L, put the key in my pocket, and went across
fte hall to our own room.

I did n't want to harbor that liquor any longer n I Wo,
so me an- Spider slipped down, got some -^^ "-^-^^'^J
soaked it in water, drenched ourselves -and repented

PROMOTHEUS IN THE TOILS 349

havin' been such fools. Then we went up to bed. It had
been some time since we had stretched out on springs, and
we were cordial for sleep; so we mingled with it in short

order. . » , j

Still I wasn't easy in my mind, and twice I woke up and
went into the hall; but I couldn't hear anything, though I
had a feelin' that the'd been some good cause for my wakm'
up I lay on the bed the last time with my mind made up to
watch Skelty's had alius had the name o' bein' a tough
joint, anc*. this red-eyed Maxwell with his Injun hair wasn't
of the kind to purify it to such an extent that the old cus-
tomers would n't feel at home.

As I lay there, I saw the window rise, slow and careful.
The' wasn't any moon; but I could see a hand in the star-
light I made up my mind to sneak out o' bed, grab the
hand, pull it in to the shoulder, and then throw all my weight
on it, and yell for Spider. I got up as noiseless as cider
tumin' into vinegar -and then upset a confounded chair,
which sounded like two houses runnin' together.

The window dropped with a bang; and at the same mo-
ment the' came a shriek from across the hall, followed by
some scufflin' and the sound o' broken glass. After this all
we heard was Tank's voice tryin' to explain his opinion o'
ihat part o' the country and all its inhabitants. I had thought
that Tank had discarded most of his profanity; but by the
time we had got our guns and crossed the hall to him, I
changed my mind. When I put the key in the lock, he sug-
gested to us what was likely to happen to any unfriendly in-
dividuals who attempted to enter that particular room.

I told him genUy to stuff the piller into his mouth, if he
couldn't find any other way to stop his yappin' ; and then I
unlocked the door, just as Maxwell and his bartender came

^5*

li^

350 FRIAR TUCK

into the hall. The bartender had one gun and one candle,

and Maxwell had two guns.

When we opened the door, there was Tank with the blood
runnin' down his leg, while he stood in a comer of the room
holdin' his weapon up above his shoulder. " What 's the
matter with you? " I sez, a little cross.

" I 'm homesick, you blame ijiot! " sez Tank. " What else
would likely be the matter with me? " Tank was about as
far out o' humor as I ever saw him get.

Maxwell came in and looked at the pool of blood. " Don't
stand there and bleed on the floor," sez he.

Tank looked at him baleful. " What do ya wish me to do
— upset your rotten dive and bleed on the ceilin'? " sez he.
" I did n't come here determined to smear up your place with
my life blood; and I want ya to understand t'.iat I didn't
punch this hole in myself simply to cool off. I know what
you 're afraid of — You 're scared that some o' your liquor
has got into my blood, an' that it'll leak out and set your

floor on fire."

" You run get a bucket for him to bleed into," sez Max-
well to the bartender.

" Yes," sez Tank, sarcastic ; " and be sure to get a big
one, as I am minded to draw off all o' my blood, just to see
how much I have in me at this time o' the year."

Sayin' which. Tank walked over an' sittin' on the bed,
held out his boot for me to pull off. He had been stabbed
through the leg, through the thick part o' the calf, and a jet
was spoutin' out of the top cut, and a steady stream oozin'
from the bottom one. I put my finger knuckle above the
top jet, and the palm of my other hand over the lower one,
and then sent Maxwell after a small rope and some bandasres.
While he was gone, a couple o' the girls strolled down

PROMOTHEUS IN THE TOILS 351

the hall to see what the excitement was ; but Tank began to
lecture about morals and maimers, and they didn't bother
us long. We patched Tank up in good order, and made
him lie down again. He said that he had been woke up
when his leg got stabbed, and had grappled with a man ; but
the man had got out the window again.

Skelty had built his place on a side hill. The bar and
dinin' hall was in front, and a small dance hall and kitchen
back of it. Upstairs were bedrooms, and the ground sloped
so, that the back rooms were only about five feet from the
ground. This made the downstairs easier to heat in winter
— and it was also convenient for any one who wanted to
get in through a window.

Me and Spider ate breakfast next momin'; but we
wouldn't let Tank eat, rememberin' the Friar's rules for
wounds. When we started away. Tank insisted on goin'
along; so we had to ride slow. We went north, instead of
in the direction we wanted to go, for fear some one might
be spyin' on us. I was mighty sorry we had come, even
though I had found out that Promotheus was ui.der sus-
picion; and as soon as we had come to a pass Vvhere we
could see a good distance in all directions, I sent Spider on
a circle to tell the boys to bring things to a head as soon as
possible.

Tank's leg ached him consid'able; and we had to ride
purty slow; but by noon we had come to the Simpsons'
cabin. We told 'em that Ty Jones was suspicious about
the Greasers and intended to get square with all who had
took a hand in removin' 'em ; so they agreed to stand with
us whenever we were ready to make a raid on Ty.

I made Tank lie down all afternoon, and drink all the
water he could swallow, but that night when I started to

'iw

352 FRIAR TUCK

ride over to the look-out, he insisted on goin' along. It was
a hard ride, and I wanted him to wait until the next night,
but he tagged along, so I had to ride slow. We had figured
out that the feller who had tried to get him had seen the
hat on his foot at the head o' the bed; and before he had
h^d time to locate him proper, the noise the other one had
made slammin' the window to my room had scared him,
so he had taken his stab haphazard.

This must 'a' been the way, 'cause when drinkin', Tank
was usually a regular long range snorer, and only a hurried
man would have mistaken his feet for his head. Tank in-
sisted that he had seen the feller's outline again' the window,
and that it had been Dixon. I doubted this; but Tank in-
sisted that the feller had had a neck Uke a beer bottle, and
then I had to give in.

We didn't reach camp until sun-up, and then we found
'at Promotheus had been there the night before, with word
that he had had a long talk with the woman, who had been
in the most rational mood he had ever seen her in. He had
drawn her into tellin' him all she could remember. She had
told him about havin' her head full o' pictures ; but not bein'
able to tell the real ones from those she had dreamed. She
said she had 1 st the key to them and could not understand
'em, that she remembered havin' sung on many different
platforms, but could not tell where or when, and could not
sing any more, though she sometimes tried. She said that
whenever he said the name Carmichael, she saw the pic-
ture of a young man in white robes, but that he had died.
When Promotheus had tried to make her understand that
he was still alive, she had become frightened, and told him
never to speak the name again.
He asked her about the Winter Garden in Berlin, and she

PROMOTHEUS IN THE TOILS 353

said 'at this called up the picture of a man with curled-up
mustaches, and then she had covered her eyes, and told him
he must not mention this again, either. Horace was tellin'
me all this; and when he finished, I sez: " Well, if this is
the most rational she has ever got, she 'd be a nice one to
handle in her usual condition. I don't see what we 're to
do ; but we have to move fast, as Ty Jones is suspicious."

The next night the Friar and I were down at the head of
the path leadin' into the ravine when Promotheus came. He
said that Dixon had come in with his face cut, and had told
about seein' us over at Skelty's, and how we had bragged
about gettin' him rail-roaded, and Dixon and the others had
told him they were ready to back him up any time he wanted
to go an' get even. He also said 'at Ty had been roastin'
the whole gang of 'em for bein' afraid of Olaf, and advised
us to warn Olaf to be on guard. He said the woman had
told him that day that at all times she had a dull pain in
the top part of her head. The was beginnin' to get worried,
this was plain to see, and he did n't stay very long.

When we told the others what he had said, we decided
it was our duty to go and tell Olaf that very night, so that
he could send over the next day and get a couple o' the
Simpson boys to come over and help watch his place at
night, until we were ready to finish with Ty. We wanted
to put it off as long as possible, as Ty would soon be in the
fall round-up and th, c wouldn't be so many men at the
home place.

Mexican Slim and Tillte Dutch started to ride to Olaf 's ;
but I was restless that night, so I rode along with 'em. Just
before we reached the Spread, we saw a bright light at the
side o' the cabin. In a minute two other lights shot up, and
we knew they were finn' brush at the side of it. We threw

354

FRIAR TUCK

in the spurs and rode, keepin' close watch. Two men rode
towards us, and we drew off to the side of the road. Just
as they got opposite, we ordered 'cm to halt; but they
whirled and fired at us. We fired back, and started after
'em ; but it was dark in the cottonwoods, and they gave us
the slip and got away.

When we reached the cabin, we saw it was doomed.
Piles o' brush had been heaped on all sides ot it and fired
one after the other. Everything was so dry that even the
dirt on the roof would have burned, and there was nothing
to do. Kit with the boy in her arms, and Olaf and Oscar
beside her were standin' close by, watchin' it bum, and they
felt mighty bitter. We told 'em why we had come, and
advised 'em to go and leave Kit with the Simpsons, and
come to our camp the next night. Then we rode back
before daylight and told the others what had happened.
We were all purty hosstile. Settin' fire to a cabin with a
sleepin' woman inside wasn't no fair way o' fightin'.

That afternoon as we were watchin' the ranch through
the field glasses, we saw the woman and Promotheus walkin'
together toward a little open space in the cottonwoods
where the' was some grass close to the edge o' the crick.
Thick bushes was all about this place, and it was cool and
pleasant in the heat o' the day. They hadn't been gone
very long when we saw two others sneakin' after them. I
looked through the glasses, and one appeared to be the
skinny feller, Dixon, and the other, the Chinese cook. We
saw 'em sneak into the bushes and disappear close to where
the woman and Promotheus were sittin'. Part o' the time
they talked together, and part of the time she read to him
out of a book.

We fair ached to yell to 'em and put 'em on their guard ;

f i

PROMOTHEUS IN THE TOILS 355

but all we could do was to sit up above in our look-out,
feelin' weak and useless. I suppose we felt like a mother
bird when she sees some inhuman human foolin' about her

nest.

After a time the Giink crept out and scurried along to
the old house. He bounced across the porch, all crouched
over, and we knew he had some evil tale to cheer up his
yellow soul with. In half a minute, Ty came out with him
and foUered him into the clump o* bushes. We could see
the woman and Promotheus plain, with our naked eyes. It
was a good thing, too ; for Horace hung on to his glasses
as though they were life preservers.

In about ten minutes, the bushes parted, and Ty stepped
into the open space in front of 'em. Promotheus got to his
feet slow, but the woman sat still, and did n't seem much
interested.

Ty glared at Promotheus durin' the few minutes he was
questionin' him, and then they all went back towards the
ranch house. The woman went on to her own cabin, and
Ty blew on the horn which hung at the side of the door,
and that sneak of a Dixon came on the run, as though he
had no idee what was wanted. Actin' under orders from
Ty, he took The's gun and then tied his hands behind him
and shut him up in an out buildin' near the stables. There
did n't appear to be any one else about the ranch, and I sug-
gested that we make a rush and take possession right then.
While we were debatin' it, we saw the punchers comin'
in from the east, across the crick. There were about a dozen
of 'em, strung out and ridin' hard the way they generally
rode.

" They 're likely to string him up this very night," sez I ;
" and we '11 have to settle this business before sun-up."

1 1

356 FRIAR TUCK

" They are not likely to be in any hurry," set the Friar.
" If we go to-night it will mean a lot o' bloodshed. To-
morrow they will go out on the range again, and we stand
a good chance of rescuing him without even a fight."

Olaf, of course, sided with the Friar, Horace sided with
me, and we had a purty heated discussion. The Friar ar-
gued that he had the most at stake and had a right to select
the plan with the least risk. I argued that Promotheus had
the most at stake, and we had no right to take risk into
account. We got purty excited, I usin' the word coward
freely, while the Friar stuck to the word folly and kept
cooler 'n I did. He finally won 'em over to a compromise.
We were to go down close and keep watch durin' the night ;
but not to make a rush until we saw Promotheus actually
in instant danger.

H i

'dRpi

CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT

OLAF RUNS THfi BLOCKADE

Ty Jones had been as wise as a fox when he located his
ranch house. It sat on high ground, while back of it rose
a cliff; so 'at the only way you could get to it without ropes
from the back, was through the little ravine. The cliffs
circled around to the crick on both sides, and the crick was
so full o' rocks that the* was only two places a hoss could
cross. He had strung barb wire through the cottonwoods in
a regular tangle along the crick, and the only places he had
to watch in case of an attack, were the ravine and these
two fords. He could see for miles in all directions by goin'
to the head o' the ravine; and you could hardly pick out
a purtier place for a last-stand 'n the one he had selected.

The new cabin for the woman was right in front o' the
mouth o' the ravine, the old cabin a hundred yards or so
farther on, the cook-house and the Chink's quarters -.u the
north o' this, the mess-hall for the men to the east of this, the
bam, wagon-sheds, workshop, and so on, some distance u>
the south, and the bunk-shack a little to the north of the
stables. He had several corrals back o' the barn and a pas-
ture of about thirty acres shut in by a wire fence.

After I had cooled off a little, I saw that the Friar was
right. The thing we could n't tell was, just how much they
had forced Promotheus to confess. If they had simply
got Ty jealous that he was tryin' to get the woman away,
we might make it all the worse by chargin' down on 'em;

358

FRIAR TUCK

while on the other hand he might have told where we were,
and Ty might take it into his head to try to get us all. This
last would have been the finest thing 'at could happen to us ;
but the' was no way to tell ; so after eatin' supper, we went
down to the edge o' the cliff to see what we could see.

We were most of us surprised to see how far the cabin
stood from the cliff. In lookin' down from our look-out, we
had failed to take the slope into account so it had looked as
though we had been able to see the woman the minute she
had come out o' the mouth of the ravine, while the fact was
the cabin stood several hundred feet from the mouth. If
it had n't been for the confounded dogs, we could have gone
down and found out what we wanted to know. We made
some remarks about those dogs which would have seared
their hair off if they 'd 'a' been a little closer.

The light was kept in the mess-hall long after time to
finish eatin' ; and we guessed they were tryin' Promotheus,
right while we were lookin' on from above. All of a sud-
den, Olaf struck his palm with his fist, and exclaimed:
" What a fool I have been ! Those dogs remembered Pro-
motheus, and he never patted 'em. I have patted 'em and
spoke soothin' words to 'em, and they would know me. I
shall go down and listen."

Now this was a noble thought and we had n't a word to
say again' it ; so Olaf went back to camp, shed his boots and
put on moccasins. Slim was a good shot with a rifle, so he
staid with Horace, who had an elephant gun and a yeamin'
to use it, up en the cliff above the mouth o' the ravine. Th^y
had seven rifles of one kind and another, and they thought
they could make a disturbance if Olaf started anything.
The rest of us went down the ravine to the last curve. We
tried to get the Friar to stay behind ; but his blood was up,

OLAF RUNS THE BLOCKADE 359
and he would n't heed us. We had it made up to rope and
tie him hand and foot, when we were finally ready to wind
thing$ up with Ty Jones.

Olaf left us with his big, hard face set into rigid lines.
He had a long score to settle with Ty Jones, and he had
made a funny gruntin' hum in his throat every few steps as
we had walked down the ravine. We waited what seemed
weeks; but the* was no uproar, and finally, he came out o'
the gloom, and spoke to us in a whisper. We went back
with him to the top o' the path before he told us what he
had heard.

He said they were tryin' to make Promotheus confess
who was back of him; but that Promotheus had steadily
refused. He sa'.d 'at Ty had told him over and over that
if he would tell him where he could lay hands on either the
Friar or Dinky Bradford, he would give him a month to
get out o' the country himself ; but Promotheus had stood
firm, and they had shut him up in the workshop again,
tellin* him he would get nothin' but water until he did
confess.

This made us some easier in our minds. Promotheus had
acted so worn out and done up since his return, that he had
fooled Ty ; and Ty looked upon him as a broke-down man,
and nothin' but a tool in the hands of some stronger men.'
Olaf said 'at Ty acted as though he thought the Friar had
sent in a report to the government, and had got Bradford
to come out here the time that Promotheus had disappeared ;
and in some way they had got word o' Horace comin'
through Bosco this last time. Dixon had told about seein'
us at Skelty's, and a strange feller told about bein' shot at,
the night Olaf's cabin had been fired. They bunched all
this together, and decided 'at the best thing to do was to

360 FRIAR TUCK

trade Promotheus for Horace or the Friar, If it could be
done. I had a chuckle all to myself, when I pictured Horace
as he had been when I took him in hand, and now with the
reputation he hadn't quite earned, bein' a worry to the
Ty Jones outfit.

" I alius said they were cowards," sez Horace, as soon as
Olaf had finished his tale. " A man 's got an imagination,
and as soon as he starts to live like a wolf, this imagination
fills the world with watchdogs. Ty Jones never has fought
in the open, and we '11 have no trouble with him as soon as
we once get him on the run."

" Ty Jones has no lear," sez Olaf. " I know ; I have seen
with my own eyes. He is too clever to be trapped; but he

has no fear."

" Well, wait and ?ee," sez Horace.
Me and Tank kept watch on the cliflf until momin' and
then as nothin' had happened, we went up to camp, and Slim
and Dutch took watch at our regu.. • look-out. As we sat
down to breakfast, we noticed 'at the Friar was gone. Sev-
eral spoke of him havin' been restless the night before and
not tumin' in when the rest did. The Friar alius was un-
regular in his habits, especially at night; so we didn't pay
much heed to him when he wrote by the fire, or went off by
himself in the quiet starlight, to sing some o' the pressure
off his heart ; but at such a time as this, we anticipated him
to be as circumspect as possible.

We started to hunt him up. but it didn't take long.
Horace found a note pinned to the Friar's tarp. and the note
told us that he had thought it all over careful durin' the
night, and had decided that his duty compelled him to go
down and offer himself in exchange for Promotheus. He
said that when things came to such a tangle that no human

OLAF RUNS THE BLOCKADE 361

ingenuity could unmix 'em, it was time to put trust in a
higher power; that it was for him that Promotheus had
risked his life, and that he felt he must take his place, as
Ty had promised to let Promotheus go if he would betray
him. He said that he could not see any way to help the
woman, and that if he lost his life, for us not to think of
revenge, as it would all turn out for the best in some myste-
rious way. The Friar had gone through a lot durin' the
last few years, and it had finally undermined his patience.
I knew just how he felt : he wanted something to happen
which would end his suspense, and he didn't care much
what it was.

As soon as Horace had finished readin', we all sat around
in complete silence, gawkin' at each other. " Things has
finally come to a head," sez Spider Kelley, solemnly.

" There now, that 's the Christian religion ! " exclaimed
Horace. " The Christian religion is founded on self-sacri-
fice and martyrdom, and all those who get it bad enough
spend the bulk o' their time on the lookout to be martyrs
and sacrifice theirselves for something — and they don't
care much what for. Look at the crusades — the flower o'
Europe was lured into the desert and dumped there like
worn-out junk, even children were offered up in this sacri-
fice. Nothing but sentimentality, rank sentimentality.
Now, when the ancient Greeks — "

" The thing for us, is to decide on what we 're to do next,
not what the ancient Greeks did a few thousand years before
we were born," sez I. " There is no use hidin' any longer.
The strongest card we have up our sleeve is the fake repu-
tation of Dinky Bradford, and what we must do is to make
up the best plan to play it."

"Why do you say fake reputation?" demanded Horace.

1 1
1 1

362

FRIAR TUCK

" Well, you 're not a government agent, are ya? " I asked.

" No," sez he; "but at the sarpe time—"

" I did n't say 'at you was a fake, Horace," scz I in a
soothin' voice. " I merely intimated that the things Ty
Jones most fears about you are the things which were
not so."

" I see what you mean," sez Horace, " and it 's all right.
What's your plan?"

" Well, as soon as we are sure 'at the Friar has reached
Ty's," sez I, " we '11 send Ty word to deliver him back at
once, and to appoint a meetin' place to explain things to us.
Not make any threats nor bluffs nor nothin'. Just a plain,
simple statement of what we want done, and sig^n your name
to it."

" I think it would be better to tell him we had his place
surrounded," said Horace.

" Nope," said I, " your old theory is best : let their imagi-
nations supply the details. If we put the government into
their minds too strong, they 're likely to find some way to
deliver Promotheus over to the law. I have a sort of im-
pediment that The was a little rough with an officer or two,
after he deserted, and Ty knows all about him."

" How the deuce will we get word to Ty ? " sez Horace.
" As fast as we 'd send messengers, Ty would shut 'em up."

" One thing is certain, at least," sez I. " Ty won't string
'em up as long as he knows he 's bein' watched. And another
thing is, that all of Ty's men are wanted for one thing or
another, and the longer we keep 'em in suspense, the sooner
they '11 weaken. We ought to send word to the Simpson
boys. They are at least two to one again' us as we stand
now."

Just at this junction, Slim arrived with the news that the

OLAF RUNS THE BLOCKADE 363

Friar was ridin' up to the ford. I was purty sure 'at he
wouldn't go down by the ravine. The Friar might lack
judgment in certain matters; but you could count on him
lookin' out for his friends, every time.

We hustled down to the look-out, and saw the Friar ride
out into the open, and hail the house. In a minute the' was
a crowd about him and they pulled him from his boss and
dragged him toward the mess-hall, actin' mighty jubilant.
The dogs raised a consid'able fuss ; but they did n't let any
of 'em get to the Friar this time. I don't know whether they
were tryin' to save the Friar or the dogs.

They took the Friar into the mess-hall, and kept him there
a good long time ; but I felt sure he would n't tell more 'n
he wanted 10. Then they brought him out and shut him up
in the workshop with Promotheus.

" You don't see 'em tumin' Promotheus loose, do ya? " sez
ol' Tank.

"Ty Jones would cheat himself playin' solitaire," sez
Spider Kelley.

" He did n't agree to turn Promotheus loose if the Friar
surrendered," sez Olaf. " He only said he would if Pro-
motheus enticed the Friar into a trap."

Ty Jones certainly did have what ya call personal mag-
netism. His men stuck up for him, even when they was
wilHn' to help snuff him out.

We sent Oscar over to get the Simpson boys; and then
we made our plans. The' was no way to get to our camp
from above, and we could easy guard the two trails 'at led
up from below. Nothin' would have suited us better 'n to
have Ty decide to come and get us; so we told Oscar to
make all the fuss he wanted when he came back.
Nothin' happened down at the ranch that day. The

1 I

364 FRIAR TUCK

woman drifted about, the same as usual, not seemin' to ob-
serve 'at the' was anything different from ordinary, and
the punchers all stayed in sight. A few of 'em rode up to
high spots across the crick and took gappin's, and a couple
of 'em came up the ravine and examined the ground on top ;
but they did n't seem to find anything to interest 'em.

That night Horace wrote an order on Ty Jones to release
the Friar — we had decided not to mention Promotheus —
and Olaf started down with the message. We posted our-
selves the same as we had done before; and after about
an hour, Olaf returned.

He said he had examined the workshop, which was of
logs, the same as the rest o' the buildin's, and had heard
the Friar and Promotheus talkin' ; but had n't ventured to
say anything for fear they were watched. He said 'at the
Friar was holdin' out on the value o' fastin' ; while Promo-
theus was speakin' in defence of ham an' eggs. Then he
said he had crept up to the front door of the old cabin, and
had fastened up the order with a dagger.

Olaf looked to me as though he had been enjoyin' himself
a little more 'n his tale gave reason for ; so I pressed him,
and finally he admitted that there had been a man on watch
at the mouth o' the ravine. He said he had wriggled through
it on his belly, thinkin' it too good a place to be overlooked
since the Friar had put 'em on their guard ; and after lyin'
still a moment, he had heard the man move. He said he had
snaked up to him, and had got him by the throat. He said
he thought it was Dixon because the' was so much throat
to get hold of. Dixon had been perfectly resigned to havin'
Olaf lynched that time and Olaf's memory was not o' the
leaky kind.
"What became of him, Olaf?" I asked.

OLAF RUNS THE BLOCKADE 365

" Oh, he fought some," said Olaf.

" Did he get away ? " I asked.

" Un, yes — yes he got away," sez Olaf.

" Where did he go to? " sez I.

" I think he went down — way down," sez Olaf.

"Down whtre?" sez I. "Why don't you tell us what
happened to him ? "

Olaf looked down at his right hand. It did n't resemble
a hand much ; but it would 'a' been a handy tool to use in
maulin' wedges into a Ic^. " Why," sez he, " he wriggled
about, and started to squeak; and when I squeezed in on
kls neck to shut off the squeak, why his neck broke. It was
too thin to be stout."

I held out my hand. " Olaf," I sez, " I want to shake the
hand that shook his neck."

"Yes," sez Tank, "and by dad, so do I!" Tank's leg
was still tender.

i^a

IJ!

CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE

nil

SKIRMISHES

Oscar arrived durin* the night with the whole four Simpson
boys ; and word that Kit and the kid were in fine shape, with
ol' man Simpson keepin' a sharp watch, and Kit ready to
take a standpat hand any time trouble crowded too close.
We expected to keep Ty busy, and so did n't worry any about
Kit. Before dawn we started the four Simpsons out to
make a circle and cross the crick, tellin' 'em to use their own
judgment to some extent; but not to run any risk. We
wanted 'em to act like scouts and, if possible, to draw Ty
into chasin' 'em, and then to lead him back to our camp.
We could see all of the other side o' the crick from our
look-out.

By dawn the rest of us were down on the edge of the cliff,
and we saw 'em find Dixon's body. They were consid'able
excited about it ; so we judged they had also read the notice
on the door.

" What shall we do, to-day?" asked Horace.

" Shoot dogs," sez I. " There ain't any call to play safe
any longer, and those dogs are the worst bother we have."

" All right," sez Horace. " This will be a good chance
for me to see if I 'm still in practice. I 'm a purty good rifle-
shot, Happy."

I never could quite harden myself to Horace. The change
in him was almost as much as that between an egg and a
chicken ; but yet the' was still a suggestion of what he had

SKIRMISHES 367

been at first — his side-burns, most likely — and it alius
jarred me to see him steamin' ahead with self-confidence
fizzin' out of his safety valve. He took his elephant gun and
trained it on one o' the dogs which was sniffin' around the
place where Dixon's body had lain. We were purty well
off to the north of the ravine ; but it was still a consid'able
angle of a down-shot, and a good long one too.

" Remember," sez I, " that when shootin' down grade,
you are mighty apt to shoot too high."

He lowered his gun an' looked at me as though I had
called him a girl baby. " I have shot from every angle the'
is," sez he ; " and I 've shot big game, too."

" Ex-cuse me! " sez I. " Shoot now, and let 's see what
happens."

You had to take off your hat to Horace when it came to
a cultivated taste in firearms. The thing he had got Pro-
metheus with had been small enough to conceal in your back
hair, while his present instrument wasn't rightly a rifle at
all, it was a half-grown cannon. It shot a bullet as big as
your thumb which mushroomed out and exploded, as soon
as it hit. The dog died a merciful death; but he left a
mighty disquietin' bunch o' remains.

" Good boy, Horace ! " I said, slappin' him on the shoul-
der. " You keep on removin' the dogs, and I '11 go up the
slope, and oertect your rear, should they try to come up the
ravine."

I heartily endorsed this slaughter o' the dogs; but I
was n't ambitious to see it done. I have been well acquainted
with a large number o' dogs of all sorts and sizes, and I
have deep feelin's for dogs. When it comes to livin' ac-
cordin' to a feller's own standard, a dog has us all beat.
When a dog signs up, he don't whisper nothin' under his

'm\

368 FRIAR TUCK

breath. He signs up for the full trip, and he don't ask a
lot o' questions about how long the hours '11 be, or what sort
o' grub and quarters and pay he '11 draw. He just wags
his tail, and sez : " This here feller is my idea of exactly
what a feller ought to be ; and I'm for him in all he does.
If he wants me to fight, I 'm hungry for it, if he wants me
to be polite and swaller a lot o' insults, I '11 do it, or if the
time comes when my death is worth more to him 'n my life,
why, I don't know nothin' about future rewards or such
truck ; but I 'm perfectly willin' to swap life for death in
his name, and I 'm proud to take the consequences — so long
as he gets the reward."

I own up 'at a dog has no morality ; he 's only a reflection
of his master. A decent man has a decent dog, a vicious
man has a vicious dog — and this is why it would have hurt
me more to watch Horace testin' his aim on the dogs 'n it
would if he had been minded to pot a few Cross-branders
themselves, especially Ty Jones.

Now, the sound o' this gun, and the sight of the dead
(Ijg made things buzz down below. The men peered out
from all directions, but hardly knew what to do. I had sent
Mexican Slim off to the right, just above the ravine, to pick
off any dogs 'at came in that direction, and soon after Horace
got his, Slim also got one ; and Ty whistled the dogs to come
to the house. Here was where his method of treatin' a dog
showed up bad. Any time before this, a dog which so much
as set foot on the porch had been belted with anything
capable of inflictin' pain, and now they refused to go inside.
The Chink was able to whistle 'em to the cook-house ; but
that was as far as they 'd go; and while they were standin'
in a bunch, Horace and Slim each got one. Ty was standin"
near one o' the poles which upheld the back porch, and

SKIRMISHES

369

Horace exploded a slab from this pole in such a way that
it knocked Ty down. This put the whole bunch into a con-
sternation. Horace certainly could shoot some. It made
me think o' the poorhouse, when I reflected on what it had
cost him to learn how.

Nothin' much happened that day. Horace and Slim stuck
to their knittin', and the Simpson boys played their part
well. They rode in a bunch, and when they 'd come in sight
o' the ranch house, one would hold the field-glass case to
his eyes, as though lookin' through the field glasses, and
another would turn and wave his hands, as though signallin'
to some one up in the hills. Once, two punchers went to the
corral and saddled bosses ; but Horace shot one o' the bosses,
and both men flew for the stable without waitin' to take off
the saddles. They had never seen such wounds as Horace's
elephant gun created, and it put 'em in a mighty thoughtful
mood.

The Simpson boys came in soon after dark; and we all
held a council of war while eatin' supper. I was purty certain
that we had a better bunch o' men than those we were
fightin'. It is no test of nerve to kill a man : a lot o' men
who got the reputation o' bein' bad were nothin' but acci-
dents or sneaks ; but when you have to stick through a slow
fight without knowin* the odds again' ya, it gives your nerve
a mighty searchin' fy-out. I had hopes that after a day or
so, they 'd be certain that the hills on all sides of 'em were
full of enemies, and they 'd be mighty glad to settle on our
terms. I did n't want to kill a single man more *n was neces-
sary. Horace also thought we could wear out their nerve;
but Olaf shook his head.

" Some o' the punchers may desert in the night," sez he ;
" but as long as a single one remains to stand back to back

li-;

370 FRIAR TUCK

with Ty Jones, Ty Jones '11 stay and fight. He has no fear
— I have seen."

" The question is this," sez I, " if those fellrrs arc the
kind to get fiercer the longer they 're kept in suspense, the
thing to do is to raid 'em to-night ; but, on the other hand,
if they 're the kind whose nerve evaporates when it is kept
uncovered, the thing to do is to wear 'em down. Let 's vote
on it."

We decided to do some more wearin' ; so we kept a guard
at the camp, and the rest of us went down to the cliff, and
tossed over stones to where we thought they 'd be hid, pro-
vidin' they had put guards at the mouth of the ravine. We
raised a yelp the first throw, and heard a rush o' men from
the new cabin, though the shadow was so dense down below
we could n't see a thing. This showed us that some o' the
dogs still survived and were bein' used as guards, and also
that there were men quartered in the woman's cabin. This
was a bother, as it would force us to be careful until we
found out where she was livin'.

We posted a guard at the top of the path leadin' up from
the ravine, another at our camp, and went to sleep, feelin'
purty tol'able well fixed. Nothin' happened that night, and
the next day, we made ready to do about the same as we had
done the day before; but when we reached the cliff, the'
was n't a sign o' life below — not a single, breathin' thing in
sight, not even a boss in the pasture.

" They 've got away ! " exclaimed Horace.

" Where to? " sez Olaf. " Ty Jones has n't any more use
for the law 'n we have, and you '11 never make me believe
'at he 's pulled out and left all his belongin's for whoever
wants 'em."

" That 's so," sez I ; " but where the deuce are they?"

SKIRMISHES 371

We watched all mornin' ; but not a sign, not a bit o' smoke
from the cook-house, just the ranch buildin's settin' there as
deserted as the Garden of Eden. The Simpsons were workin'
their stunts across the crick ; so about ten in the mornin',
Slim and Dutch rode over to tell *em to come in, as they
would look mighty foolish, providin' they were makin' sig-
nals to one of the hills where the Cross-branders themselves
were hid.

After eatin' dinner, the rest of us went down to the look-
out, Horace shoulderin' his elephant exterminator, and
lookin' peevish and fretful, 'cause the' was nothin' to shoot
at. " Boys," sez I, " do ya suppose 'at poor old Promo-
theus has been goin' all this time on nothin' but water."

" He 's gone longer 'n this on nothing but water," ^ez
Horace ; " and so have i. Over in Africa, once, we sent a
tribe o' blacks aroui / beat some lions out for us; but
they fell in with anot* r tribe who were not friendly, and
they just kept on goin'. Promotheus and I were i* -om
everything, and we got into a desert before we found a , .y
out. We went for I don't know how long without water.
Anyway, we went long enough to get into that numb con-
ditiMi when the earth becomes molten copper, and the sky
a sun glass, and a man himself feels like another man's night-
mare. That tender old Promotheus you 're sympathizin'
with, carried me the best part of a day, or a century - :ime
had melted entirely away — and when we came back \ our
senses we lay beside a pool of water. He 's tough, Promo-
theus is."

" At the same time," sez Tank, " settin' cooped up in a
log hut with nothin' to cheer ya but water, is n't my idy of
havin' high jinks."

" Perhaps, too," sez Spider Kelley, who did n't have enough

^7^

FRIAR TUCK

p I

sense of fitness to change a nickel, " those mongrel coyotes
lynched both him an' the Friar before they vamosed."

"They wouldn't do that," sez Olaf; "but I wish we
knew what they had done."

" Let 's go and shoot at the old cabin or the bunk-shack,"
sez Oscar.

" I move we wait, and raid 'em to-night," sez I, and this
was what we decided to do.

The rest of u'j lolled about purty patient — as active men,
an' beasts too, are likely to do when the's nothin' on hand
— but Horace who haJ lived in a room most of his life,
had n't quite learned to turn off his steam when he had n't
any use for it ; so he kept bobbin' up and fussin' about. All
of a sudden, he gave a sort of gasp, and pointed up the slope.

We looked and saw one man crouched over and runnin'
along where the south trail to our camp swung around a
crag ; and we sprang to our feet, and looked up at the camp.
As we looked, the face of Ty Jones with a grin on it, poked
up over a stone and leered down at us most exasperatin'.

CHAPTER FORTY

AN IRRITATINC. CHIN

Now, you can mighty easy understand that this was a fair
sized, able-bodied, bite-and-kick consternation for us, if
ever the' was one in the world. Our look-ot t was behind a
ridge which sheltered it complete from below, but left it as
open from above as the straw hat which Stutterin' Sam
made the dude crawl through. Up above us, lookin' down
from the rocks in front of our camp was Ty Jones, grinnin'
•'s self-composed an' satisfied as a cat which has just re-
moved all evidence of there ever havin' been any Canary
birds; and truth to tell, we felt as indiscriminate and em-
barrassed as a naked man at a dance party.

All we saw was just Ty and his grin. We knew the' was
one other man with him, but that was all we did know;
while our strength was as plain to them, as Tillte Dutch was
the time he fell in love and used iodaform on his hair in-
stead o' perfume. We just stood and looked up at Ty, and
then we turned our heads and looked at each other, and I
never saw as many stupid expressions in one mess. We felt
as though every minute was liable to be our next.

Whenever ol' Tank Williams was surprised or puzzled
or wrastlin' with his own thoughts, he a'^us put me in mind
of a picture I once saw of a walrus The walrus was
loungin' up on a rock, and he looked as solemn and philo-
sophical as though some young snip of a school boy had
tested his intellect by askin' him what two times one made.

i^^' I

374 FRIAR TUCK

I never saw Tank look so much like the walrus as he did
this time 'at Ty Jones surprised us. O' course Tank's teeth
was different, but his mustaches stuck down in much the
same way, and when I looked at him, I busted out laughin'
though I own up I was scared enough to stampede the mo-
ment before. When I laughed, it seemed to break the charm,
and before I buttoned up my lips again, Horace had pulled
up his elephant gun, and taken a blast at Ty's grin. Tj
pulled down his face behind the stone as soon as Horace
aimed at him ; but the range was long enough to strain ever
such a devil-tool as this half-grown cannon, so nothin' came
of it.

After my chuckle, I began to think in streams. The
ground to the right of us — as we looked up towards Ty —
was broken, and it occurred to me that he had been holdin' us
with his grin so as to give some of his men time to sneak
down and cut us off, he and the balance were above us, the
ravine to our left, and straight back of us the cliff. We
could n't stick where we were again' odds, and there was n'l
any water in the clump of rocks which faced the path where
it come out of the ravine. As I ran over these details
in my mind, I had as little temptation to laugh as I
ever did have; but the second I thought of the clump o'
rocks facin' the path, I saw that the path itself was the
answer.

There was no reason to hurry, as far as I could see ; they
could not come to us without exposin' themselves, and every
moment we wa'ted, the closer would come Dutch, Slim, and
the four Simpson boys. To the right of us, as I said, the
ground was broken, and here was where they would be most
likely to sneak down on us. By goin* in a diagonal direc-
tion, we could get to where we could see straight up the

AN IRRITATING GRIN

375

washes which made up this broken ground, and so know
w..at we had to fight.

" Come on, fellers," sez I, climbin' up over the ridge.

" Where ya goin'? " sez Horace.

I sat down on top o' the ridge, " Have you got an>
plan?" sez I calmly.

" No," sez he, " I have n't ; but I 'd like to know — "

" If you 're willin' to take charge," sez I, " why, go
ahead, and I '11 obey orders ; but I don't care how small
the body is, it can't do quick work with more 'n one head,
as you ought to know better 'n any of us — it havin' been
tried frequent in those Greek tales you 're all the time in-
flictin' us with."

Horace put his back up a little. " I 'm willin' to agree
lo anything reasonable," sez he ; " but I don't see any sense
in leavin' this spot until we know where we 're goin'."

I folded my fingers together, set my thumbs to chasin'
each other, and began to whistle. I wasn't jealous of
Horace; but it just occurred to me that I had handled men
before he'd mustered up courage enough to stay out after
seven o'clock p. m. without gettin' his mother's permission,
and I wanted to test the others and see if they thought he
had picked up more craft in three years 'n I had in a life-
time; so I whistled the tune to his song, and looked up
at the clouds.

" What 's your idee, Happy? " sez ol' Tank. I had nour-
ished Tank on thought-food for a good long session, and
I knew he 'd feel mighty much like a lost calf if I left him
to rustle up his own idees ; so I just gave my hands a little
toss and kept on with my whistlin'.

"Aw, don't be so blame touchy," sez Spider Kelley. I
had pulled Spider through a number o' tight places, also,

■I -J

376

FRIAR TUCK

and I knew he 'd soon begin to feel trapped up and smothery,
if I left him to sweat out his own idees for a few minutes
longer; so I gave him the same gesture I had bestowed on
Tank.

" What do you think we 'd better do, Olaf ? " sez Horace.

Olaf looked all around but did not see anything. " They
have come up the ravine, took the path up the other side,
through the clump o' trees, made a wide circle and got to
our camp," sez Olaf. "If we try to get away, they cut us
off. If we stay here, we die for want of water. If we rush
up the hill, they shoot us from behind th'» rocks. All I can
see is to wait until night, and then make a rush for it."

" Well, that don't look like much of an idee to me," sez
Horace. I kept on whistlin'.

" I move we foUer Happy," sez Spider Kelley.

" I second the motion," sez Tank.

" I 'm willin' to," sez Olaf, and Oscar nodded his head.
This was about all Oscar ever used his head for except to
hang his hat on ; but he was a good boy and sizey.

" All right," sez Horace. " Now then, Happy Hawkins,
the responsibility is on you."

" Now, be sure you mean this," sez I ; " for my plan is
a foolish one, and I don't care to explain each step. I don't
claim 'at my scheme is the best ; but my experience has been,
that a poor plan carried out beats a good plan which never
came in. Climb up here, and we '11 walk off in that direc-
tion without lookin' behind us."

They couldn't see any sense in this; but they follered
me without chatterin', and I was satisfied. Horace had the
field glasses in his pocket; so when we had reached the
place I thought would do, I set him to lookin' across the
crick careful to see if he could see anything. All the others

AN IRRITATING GRIN

377

watched him, and I got behind and looked up the slope. I
saw several men hidin' in the washes, and I said in a low
tone : " Keep on lookin' across thf^ hill, Horace. Now, you
others get out from behind him. Now, Horace, whirl and
examine the washes up the slope and sec how many men
you can count."

Horace whirled, as did all the rest of 'em, and we found
seven fellers in sight. We figured 'at there must be at least
fifteen Cross-branders in the neighborhood, and probably
more, and the ones we were able to see in the washes con-
vinced me 'at Ty had staked everything on gettin' us cor-
nered. T^cy did n't have enough to split up, so I felt sure
they would leave the ine open, not thinkin' it likely we 'd
try to go down there.

" Now,'* sez I, " let 's go to that clump o' rocks and hide."
They all came along but did n't seem enthusiastic, because
the washes led down close to the rocks — we, ourselves,
havin' sneaked down 'em while we were waitin' for the
woman that day. We could n't see the path the boys would
take in comin' up to our camp from across the crick, while
the Cross-branders could see 'em a good part o' the way,
and this fretted me a lot; though I hoped they had heard
Horace's elephant gun.

After a time, Horace, through the glasses, saw a feller's
head watchin' us from our old look-out; so we knew they
had crept up along the back o' that ridge. Then we heard
consid'able shootin' off to the right, and knew the boys had
got back. There were several good places for ambush, and
we felt purty blue at what had most likely happened; but
they were on hossback, and would be on their guard after
knowin' 'at the Cross-branders were up to some trick; so
we hoped for the best.

' II

t 'I

378

FRIAR TUCK

111

H M

This clump o' rocks we were in was composed of one
big crag and a lot o' little ones. The big one shut of¥ our
view, and finally Horace said it would be a good plan to get
on top of it, as the chances were we could get a good view
in all directions. It was fifteen feet up to where the' was
footin', and we didn't see how it could be done; but he
said it was simple ; so we let him try it. He made Olaf and
Tank face the rock, holdin' on to each other. Then I
climbed to their shoulders and they passed up Horace. I
handed him up as far as I could reach, and it was as simple
as peelin' a banana. The signal was for him to drop a
pebble when he wanted to come down.

In about two moment, stone the size o' your fist fell on
Oscar's head; which was a good thing, for it might other-
wise have hurt a head we had more use for. We laddered
ourselves again' the rock, and Horace came down without
missin' a single one of our ears. When he reached the level,
he put his finger on his lips, and said he had seen ten men
sneakin' up toward the rock and only a few hundred feet
away. Oscar was still holdin' to the lump on his head, so
Horace explained 'at the' hadn't been any pebbles on top
the crag.

" Now, what ya goin' to do? " asked Horace to me.

" You, Olaf, and Oscar go around the rock to the left,"
sez I ; " and Tank, Spider, and I '11 go around to the right.
Each fire only once, and then run around the rock again and
make for the path leadin' down into the ravine. Keep close
together all the way."

" The ravine ! " exclaimed Spider.

" Sure," sez I.

" All right," sez Spider, draggin' out the " all " until it
would do for " I told ya so," in case we got pocketed.

AN IRRITATING GRIN 379

It worked fine; we flew around, surprised 'em, shot a
volley into 'em, made 'em seek cover, and then we flew for
the head o' the path. Ol' Tank, with his damaged prop,
was as nimble as a one-legged Norman hoss, and Horace
was loaded down with elephant ammunition ; so that it was
wise to have all the time we could get. Ty and five others
jumped up from our look-out, and tried to head us off ; but
they had to go twice as far as we did. Ty and two others
had rifles, and they stopped and took shots at us, but nothin'
came of it.

" Hurry on to the ranch buildin's," I called as we went
down the path. Then I turned back, to see what they were
doin'.

" Let me take a shot at 'em," sez Horace's voice at my
elbow.

" Why did n't you go on with the rest? " sez I. " I can
give you half way and beat you runnin'."

" Let me take just one shot," sez Horace, so I gave in
and let him. Two fellers were runnin' at a long angle
toward the mouth o' the ravine to head us off, and get a
shot from above; so I told him to try for one o' them.
He fiddled with his hind sight as calm as though shootin'
for a Christmas turkey, and hanged if he did n't topple one
over. The other stopped, and then ran back with his head
ducked low to the ground, while the wounded one crawled
behind a rock.

" Now dust for the buildin's," sez I ; " and don't try any
more nonsense. Let me carry the weapon, and you won't
be so overloaded. I '11 start after you in a jiffy."

When I looked back, I saw that all of 'em had slowed
down consid'able, out o' respect to the elephant gun; but
I could still count seventeen, so we hadn't seen 'em all

■ t ,

t ;
t ■■

ih!

I!"

i ^^

■'' 'ft

II I

380 FRIAR TUCK

before. When they started towards the head of the path
again, I took a shot at Ty Jones; but I didn't savvy the
rear sight, and all it did was to make 'em slow down once
more. Then I slid down the path and hot-footed it down
the ravine. I saw signs o' bosses, so I knew they had rodt
most of their trip, and would be in a position to circle around
all they wanted to.

I soon caught up with the others, and Tank was puffin
purty freely. All the rest were runnin' easy, and we came
out o' the mouth o' the ravine without seein' a single soul.
Now, we hardly knew what ■> do. It was about the same
distance from the mouth o' the ravine to the first curve in
it, as it was to the woman's cabin ; so I told Spider to staj
at the corner o' the cabin, and watch that curve.

Then we went around and found the door locked. We
called twice to the woman, but the' was no reply; so Olai
picked up a big stone and knocked off the lock. We madt
a quick examination ; but the' was no one there. I posted
Horace and Spider in this cabin to watch the mouth o' the
ravine through the window facin' it, and to shoot into 'em,
should they foller us close.

We next went to the big house, where we had more trouble
as everything was fastened with bars on the inside, except
the front door which had an immense padlock on the out-
side. We finally broke it off, and out dashed three o' theii
confounded dogs. We killed 'em, and went inside ; but the
was no one else there. Next we went to the workshop, and
after breakin' off the padlock, we found the Friar and Pro
motheus gagged and tied. The Friar was sad, and Pro
motheus was mad. We sent 'em up to the cook-shack tc
get on speakin' terms with food again, and rummaged the
rest o' the buildin's ; but could find neither the woman noi

AN IRRITATING GRIN 381

the Chink, and by the time we were through, it was gettin'
along towards dark.

I set Tank to cookin' a meal while the rest of us carried
logs and piled 'em in the mouth o' the ravine. It would
be moonlight up to ten o'clock, and after that I intended to
have a fire to see by. We also set up some logs at each o'
the two fords. After supper we divided into two equal
groups o' four each, to stand guard, each man to watch
two hours, one at the window of the new cabin, the other
from the porch of the old one, where a view across both
fords could be had.

The Friar was purty downcast at our not bein' able to
find the woman, and at our still bein' in a state o' war ; but
he did n't kick none. He promised not to go over and sur-
render himself any more, and said he would stand guard
careful, and warn us the first thing 'at happened. We de-
cided 'at they would probably attack us that night, and we
finally chose the old shack, as it had water piped into it from
a spring a hundred yards above. I figured 'at they 'd be
most apt to come down the ravine, so I picked out the Friar,
Olaf, and Tank to help me watch it, and the others to take
turns watchin' the fords.

About half past nine, we lit the fires and turned in, with
Oscar on the porch, and Olaf at the window of the new
cabin, I thought they wouldn't come before two o'clock,
and had it arranged so 'at the last ford watches would be
held by Spider and Promotheus.

n *

: !

itJ'l

siii

ut'

CHAPTER FORTY-ONE

THE NIGHT-ATTACK

I WAS n't sleepy, and lyin' stretched out is the worst cu
for sleeplessness 'at ever I tried ; so after twistin' about f
a while, I got up and took a look around. Oscar hadt
seen a thing, which I took to be a mighty encouragin' sig
Mostly, when you set a boy on guard he rouses ya out
meet the enemy every fifteen minutes, and then go
to sleep just before the enemy actually does arrive; b
Olaf had trained Oscar to do what he was told,
he was told — when he was told — and then not to ta
about it for a couple o' years afterward. Oscar w
reliable to a degree; but for conversational purposes, I
sooner have been shipwrecked with a brindle bi
pup.

I didn't have any doubts of Olaf; but I dropped in
see what sort of a view he had, now that it had got dar
The fire was burnin' high, and the ravine was as bright
day. Enough o* the fire would last until momin' *.o give
good view, so I strolled down around the bunk-shack ai
stables. I saw a form movin* in the shadow o' the cotto
woods, and stalked it careful, finally gettin' close enough
make out the Friar.

** Can't ya sleep, Friur ? " sez I.

" No, no, I can't sleep," sez he with a sigh. " Where (
you think she is, Happy?"

" They probably took her with 'em ; and left the Chii

THE NIGHT-ATTACK 383

to guard her, back in the hills," sez I. " No matter what
happens, they 're not liable to harm her."

" It 's sore hard to be patient," sez the Friar. " I am
honestly opposed to all violence and bloodshed. I have alius
believed that all wars were useless and unnecessary; but
it 's sometimes hard for me to love my enemies."

" You 're just worried and can't see clear," sez I sooth-
in'ly. " It *s plain enough if you just think it out — that 's
the best part o' religion. One place it sez : ' Love your ene-
mies.' In another it sez : ' Poller the Lord's example.' In
still another it se^ : ' Whom he loves, he chasteneth ' —
which you said meant to punish. Now then, you have it aU
worked out : the proper way to love your enemy is to punish
him; and, accordia' to this rule, we're goin' to love the
hide off o' one o' your enemies, if so be we *re able to do it."

But the Friar never would stand for havin' his religion
doctored to suit the taste, he had to take it as stiff and raw
as alcohol, where he was concerned, himself ; so he turned
in and explained things to me until from my standpoint,
misery was the only religious excuse a feller had for bein'
happy.

By this, it was time to change watches, so the Friar re-
lieved Olaf, while Horace and his elephant-pest went out
on the front porch to watch the fords, and I turned in.
None of us took our boots off that night ; we had a little
fire in the big room, and slept on the floor, holdin' our belts
in our hands, i drowsed off quick enough this time, knowin'
'at Tank and Promotheus would be next on watch and cer-
tain not to let anything surprise them.

Sure enough, just about the time we had slept ourselves
into complete forget fulness, we were all jerked to our feet
by the first shot Tank fired, and this one shot was followed

■If

384 FRIAR TUCK

by a bunch of others. The Cross-branders had crept dor
the ravine, and a Httle after three when the fire had burn
low, they had tried to get by unnoticed. Ol' Tank only li
one eye, but it was a workin' eye, if ever the' was one, a
he shot two of em with one o' their own rifles, and wli
they rushed him in a body, sprcadin' out wide, he retreat
to the old cabin, accordin' to directions.

The old cabin had loopholes in it, and we had found thi
fairly good rifles, but not much ammunition. Vve did
waste any shots while it was still dark ; but they fired at
now and again. They had brought the five rifles w? li
left at our camp, and used 'em freely. Slim had taken t
other rifle with him.

All durin' that day they broke the monotony by tak
frequent shots at us; but the logs in the cabin had be
matched up for just such a purpose, and not one of us \\
even scratched with a splinter. What we were most afr;
of was, 'at they would find some way to set fire to the cab
and we counted on that bein' one o' the night's diversitie

There were three good sized rooms in the old cabin whi
was only one stor> high. One big room occupied the f
south half o' the cabin, a bedroom was in the northe;
corner, and a library in the northwest corner. Yes, sir
regular library, and the Friar and Horace both said it v
a choice collection o' books. Horace showed us one be
which had a photograph of the original Promotheus chair
to a rock with the vultures peckin' at his liver, and he c
tainly must have been some man to stand it. This picti
made The's eyes light up consid'able.

The' was also some chromos of naked stone images
the wall, which the Friar and Horace called mighty f
copies. They were purty well dumb-founded to find 'at

THE NIGHT-ATTACK

385

Jones did n't live as much like a bob-cat as they 'd thought.
Under the book shelves was a row o' locked drawers. They
stuck out farther than the shelves above 'cm, and we wanted
to pry 'em open to see what was inside; but the Friar
would n't let us.

That was a wearin' day, and we were all glad when it
finally dragged itself to the lake o' darkness, and dove in.
We had our minds made up for a busy night, but waitin'
for trouble is more crampin' to the soul than bein' in the
midst of it, so we felt cheerfuller as soon as night actually
settled down.

We didn't dare have a fire in the fireplace, for fear it
would show 'em our loopholes, and we didn't care to ad-
vertise these any more 'n was necessary ; but we set a lighted
candle far back in the fireplace, to see to load by. The fire-
place was across the southwest comer o' the big room.
There were no loopholes in the library, but we feared the
light might leak through a chink in the window shutter,
so we didn't have any light there. We kept one man
watchin' through loopholes in the bedroom, and two
watchin' in the big room, and were able to cover the whole
neighborhood.

The cook-shack was the nearest buildin', and only the two
loopholes in the north end o' the bedroom covered that ; so
we decided to fling the library window open and fire through
;hat, in case they made a rush from that direction. We
knew they wouldn't be likely to start anything until after
eleven, as the moon would n't set until then, so we stretched
out on the floor, leavin' Oscar, Horace, and Spider on watch.

When a feller has been keepin' his attention wound up for
several days, his mainspring finally gets strained, and the
o^s in his head get to cuttin' up regardless. I managed to

f'l ;'

386 FRIAR TUCK

get a purty fair dab o' sleep ; but it seemed as though I do
straight out o' wakefulness into a dream, and it was some t
rottenest dream I ever had. I dreamed that Ty Jones h
come and stooped over me and asked mc what I thought
the way he had conducted his life. In a dream a feller
apt to do the foolest things imaginable, so I looked up ir
Ty's face and ^old him my true opinion. I sez to hit
" Ty, if you. rains were blastin' powder, they would
make enough explosion to raise your hat."

Ty didn't take kindly to this opinion; so he jumped ir
the air and lightin' on my face, began to trample it with I
heels. The discomfort of this wakened me; but at fii
I did n't know I was awake. Several men had been actua
tramplin' on me. and the' was a general Bght takin' place
that room which was hard to make head or tail of.

In the flickeiin' candle rays, it was mighty bothersoi
to tell who from which ; so the' was no shootin'. Aside f re
Ty and Pepper Kendal, we averaged bigger 'n they d
except Kora*. and Spider. Spider had length but he r
small in the arms and legs, while Horace was twenty-ti
caliber any way you looked at him. They abused Hora
some consid'able, and he got kicked and tiampled on pui
liberal ; but he was of terrier blood, and the second or tlii
time he got kicked into a corner, he crawled out on his han
an' knees, picked out a pair o' legs which was strange
him, wrapped his arms about 'em, and fetched their owr
to the floor with a thun^p. I spared enough time to kno
the feller on the head; and then Horace played his tri
over again.

Olaf was a mad bull in a mix-up like this — Horace sj
he had beershirker blood in him, and this must be good sti
for it made Olaf grin when Horace accused him of it.

THE NIGHT-ATTACK 387

course the' ain't much head or tail to such a fight, and in
iookin' back on it. it's just Uke spurtin* the pages of a
picture-book with your thumb and tryin' to observe the pic-
tures. I saw tiic Friar Icanin' again' the mantel-piece with
a hurt look on his face ; and it disgusted me.

In times o' peace, I respected his prejudice again' violence;
but this was no time for foolishness, and I recall t lutterin'
to myself a wish that Horace might have the loan of his
big body for the rext half hour. I saw 0!af knock down
two men with one blow, I saw The save ol' Tank's life, just
as a half-breed was about to knife him from beh.nd; but
for the most part it was just about as orderly a mess as
a popper-ful o' corn over a bed o' coals.

The fight did n't last more 'n five or ten minutes. They
had banked on surprisin' us ; and when this failed they were
ready to back out. I afterward found out that it was the
Friar who had caught sight of 'em first, he not bein' able
to sleep.

Ty and Pepper Kendal were the last to leave the big room ;
and when tiieir own men were out of it, they opened fire
on us ; we fired back, and when they backed into the library
where the rest o' their gang had disappeared, we made a
rush for 'em. I supposed they had come in through the
library window, and I called for a candle, hopin' to grab Ty
before he could get out.

Spider Kelley had already picked up the candle, and he
had it in the doorway in a second. The big drawers at the
bottom o' the bookcase were swung back, showin* a stair-
way behind 'em, and Ty Jones stood at the top with Pepper
Kendal just behind him. I dove through the air, catchin'
Ty's wrist with my left hand .' u his throat with my right.
Pepper Kendal bent his gun on me, Olaf grabbed the gun

388

FRIAR TUCK

which was fired just as The grabbed Pepper's arms. ]
looked to me as though the bullet must have gone into Olaf '
head; but just then we tripped, rolled down the stairs an
the imitation drawers swung to behind us.

All holts were broke on the way down, and when I rea« ;ie
the bottom, I lay a^ ^uiet as a frozen moonbeam. I hf r
steps runnin' away irom me in the dark, and presently th
legs of the man next to me moved, and he got up. I ros
to a crouchin' position, held my arm above my head, an
whispered, " Who is this ? "

For answer, I got a smash on the arm with the butt of
forty-five which drove it down again' my head hard enoug
to bring me to my knees and wake up my horse-sense,
might 'a' known they 'd have a sigfnal.

I waited with my back again' the wall until the silenc
began to soak into my nerve. One o' my guns had got los
durin' the mess upstairs ; but I still had the other, and whe
I closed my grip around it, it seemed like I was shakir
hands with my best friend. As far as I could discover
had n't been shot ; but several knife-cuts and bruises bega
to hum little tunes which was n't in nowise cheerin'. I jus
simply don't like to be kept waitin* in the dark!

After a bit I reached my hand out cautious, and felt th
heel of a ridin' boot. I examined as careful as though th
feller inside the boot was a disguised bear-trap; but the
was no need. His neck was broke. I felt of his face, and i
was soft and smooth. The face of the young feller witl
the boy's eyes, I had seen put to bed drunk that night a
Skelty's, flashed across m^. and I gave a sigh ; but I had to
much on my mind to turn soft, so I began to feel arouni
again.

Presenth my fingers struck the heel of another boot.

THE NIGHT-ATTACK

389

shut down on my bellows until the breath did n't get down
past the top inch o' my neck, and I was as gentle with the
heel o* that boot, as though it was a bitin' man's eyeball;
* 'ofcause I sure felt a quiver in it. I slid my fingers up that
Ij t (A a quarter inch at a time, and I did n't use no more rude-
I r -ss 'n a mouse would use in tryin' to sneak a cheese piller
out from under a sleepin' cat. When my fingers finally
struck corduroy, I purt nigh gave a shout, for this was what
Promotheus wore.

It alius embarrasses a man to be felt over in the dark, so
I took my time with The ; but after locatin' both hands and
his crooked mouth, I discovered he 'd been knocked out
complete. I rubbed his wrists until he began to moan, and
then I pinched his nose until he was able to notice my name
when I whispered. He had bumped his head in fallin', and
it made him sick to the stomach; so while he was gettin'
tuned up again, I prospected around.

I crawled up the stairs but couldn't hear a sound, I
scratched with my fingers, knocked softly, and pushed until
my eyes began to hurt ; so I knew 'at the only way out for
us was to follow the Cross-branders. Things had happened
so sudden up above that I had n't an idy as to how
many were fightin' us; but I was still purty certain that
a fair sized bunch had run out the tunnel just as I dove
into it, and I didn't choose to bump into 'em in the
dark.

When I came down the stairs, The felt able again ; so we
started to prospect. W^e agreed that strikin' our teeth to-
gether would be our signal, and then wc made our examina-
tion. The right side o' the tunnel was smooth, the way
Nature works, the left side was rough, and indicated man's
doin's. Aside from us two, the only other one in the tunnel

390

FRIAR TUCK

was the boy with the broken neck ; but the tun: el opene
into a big cave, and we did n't know what to do about it.

Finally we started around the right hand wall, me crawlir
first, and The's fingers *ouchin' my boot at every mov(
After goin' some distance, a great, straggly gray form ros
up from the floor o' the cave, and gave me a shock whic
stopped my entire works. I kept my presence o' mind a
right ; but I 'd 'a' been mighty glad to swap it off for absenc
of body. This was a most ghastly lookin' form, and I nestle
up again' the side o' the wall, and felt my hand back for Thi
He crawled up alongside o' me, and when he spied it, li
gave a start which made his teeth click, " What 's that ?
he whispered.

It 's funny how the min J works. This form did n't n
semble anything earthly ; so I had n't really tried to figui
on it much ; but when The threw his question at me, I looke
at the shape more careful, and grew ashamed o' mysel
Here was I, a feller who had spent consid'able time aroun
mines, and yet had got all balled up over seein' thing
underground.

" That 's your old friend, daylight, comin' down throug
a hole. The," I whispered so prompt that I doubt if h
noticed any gap.

He gave a sniff through his nose, and then we crept on t
where this light was comin' in through the opposite tunne
It was mighty weak and sickly lookin' light, but the outlir
o' the tunnel mouth soon got perfectly plain to us. Ever
few inches we stopped to listen; but we got clear to th
mouth without hearin' anything. Then we paused. Just i
that time, I 'd have given right smart to have had m
eyes fastened on like those of a lobster I once saw i
a window down at Frisco. This insect had his eyes fixe

THE NIGHT-ATTACK 39i

to the ends o' fingers which he could stretch out in any

direction.

To be honest, I felt some reluctant to push my face around
that comer ; but when I did there was n't a thing in sight.
The tunnel stretched ahead of us for what seemed miles,
but we couldn't see the outer openin', although the light
was strong enough to recognize each other by. The was a
sight, for the bump on his head had leaked continuous ; but
it had n't disabled him none, so we drew back to consult a

little.

If we had known whether they were ahead or behind us,
it would have been easy to decide ; but under the circum-
stances, we hardly knew what to do. Bein' in the dark was
one thing; but bein' out where we could be seen was still
another ; so we thought full and deep.

After a few minutes I told The a little story about a feller
I helped to pick up after he ad jumped from a thirty-foot
ledge onto a pile o' stone. Why did you do it?" sez I.
He blinked his eyes at me a time 'r two, hove a long sigh,
an' said: " The' was a pu"- le dragon in front o' me, a lot o'
long-legged yaller snakes back o' me, and the peskiest pink
jack-rabbit you ever saw kept swoopin' into my face an'
peckin' at my eyes. If I ever drink another drop, I hope it '11
drown me."

The considered this story careful, an' then we crawled out
into the tunnel, rose to our feet, an' ran along crouchin'.
The tunnel ran upward at a sharp incline, which was why
the light came down it so far. We kept to the right wall,
and after goin' some distance, we came across a small cave.
In this we found another dead Cross-brander ; but we
were n't enough interested in him to risk strikin' a light ; so
we sat down a moment to rest and listen.

! ('

39*

FRIAR TUCK

■I

Presently we noticed some curious noises, but for sonw
minutes we could n't decide on what they were. Suddenlv
The grabbed my wrist an' said : " That 's shootin' ; that s
what that is ! "

It was as plain as home-cookin' the minute he pointed ii
out ; so we rose to our feet and made a rush for the moutl
o' the cave. We came out about half way up the face o' th(
cliflf; and for a moment we paused to admire Ty Joncs'i
foxiness. This openin' couldn't be seen from below, no
noticed from above, and for the most part the whole tunne
was natural, only havin' been hand-widened in three or fou
places.

The fightin' was goin' on near the face o' the cliff betweei
us an' the mouth of the ravine ; so we circled around unti
we caught sight of 'em. The first feller' we made out \va
Mexican Slim ; so we knew our boys had n't been ambushe
up above, and this raised our spirits like a Walloon. We crej
up until we could get good angle-shots, hid ourselves, gav
the old Diamond Dot yell, and began to shoot. Ty's me
had been losin' their bullet-appetite for some time, and the
took us to be genuwine reinforcements. They were we
planted where they were, but they started to retreat, and w
crowded 'em close.

Then it was that Ty made Olaf 's word good : he expose
himself to shots, he rallied his men, and that wolf-grin nevi
left his face ; but still the tide had changed, and he had '
go back with the rest. The woman, with her hands ti(
behind her, was in charge o' the Chink, who was tall ai
heavy-set with a dark, evil, leathery face. He kept a gr
on his face, too, which reminded me most of a rattlesnake
sheddin' time. He used the woman as a shield, an' tli
checked our fire an' kept us dodgin' for new positions. Sti

THE NIGHT-ATTACK

393

all in all, this part o' the fight was about as satisfactory as
any I ever took part in.

Finally they retreated to the dip where the tunnel came
out, and we had to skirmish up the rocks to keep our van-
tage. Soon we discovered that Ty had lost control of his
men. He, Pepper Kendal, and two others stood in the mouth
o' the tunnel, and took a few shots at us before disappearin' ;
but six of his men ran straight across the dip, and down the
other side toward the crick. Tillte Dutch was standin' close
to me, and I asked him where the bosses were. He said they
were tied across the crick just above the upper ford; so
I sent him for 'em full speed.

Horace and Tank stayed to watch the mouth o' the openin',
while the rest of us wrangled the six Cross-brandcrs through
the cottonwoods. They had a good start, and so had time
to cut the wire and cross the crick toward some broken land
on the left. By this time Tillte had tied the reins and thrown
'em over the horns o' the saddles so as to lead a string, and
he came lopin* into view.

Slim, two o' the Simpson boys, Olaf, and myself mounted
and cut oflF the six Cross-branders, who were too weary to
even scatter. They had had enough and surrendered. We
tied their hands, and herded 'em back to the old shack, where
Oscar, Spider, and three disabled Cross-branders were
runnin' a little private hospital. We fixed up wounds as
well as we could, sat the last six on a bench along the wall,
and left Dick Simpson to guard 'em. Spider had been shot
and cut consid'able ; but he was able to stagger around some,
while Oscar had been punctured below the ribs, and things
looked bad for him. Olaf had been shot in the head, all
I right, just as The and I dove down the stairway the night
before, but his skull was bullet-proof, so nothin' came of it.

394

FRIAR TUCK

The Friar had been ransackin' the locality, and had found
one o' the Simpson boys dead, and one badly hurt. Badly
crippled, as we were, we did n't see any way to get at Ty
except to starve him out. First oflf, we made some coffee,
and those who weren't hurt dangerous were given some
side-meat and corn bread ; for, truth to tell, we were about
once through. We spent the afternoon under a tree half wav
between the mouth o' the tunnel, and the old cabin, so as to
be handy in case we were needed. After talkin' it all over,
we could n't quite see why they had split up, some of 'era
tryin' to escape, and some stayin' with Ty.

Finally I went to the cabin, durin' a time the Friar was
on watch at the cave mouth, and picked out the weakest
lookin' of the prisoners, I brought him down, and we tor-
tured him with questions until he got fuddled and told us
that the two who had stuck to Ty had been so bad hurt,
they could n't go any farther ; but that neither Ty nor Pepper
were hurt to speak of.

The fact is, that in a general fight a feller loses his aim
complete. We had all aimed at Ty and Pepper the most,
and here they were the two not hurt at all. As darkness fell,
the Friar could n't hold himself in. All afternoon he had
done what he could for the wounded ; but at thought of the
woman spendin' another night in the cave with those men,
he became as wild-eyed as a bronc at his first brandin'.
Durin' the afternoon. Tank had stiffened until he couldn't
do much travclin' ; but I saw the Friar had his mind made
up to take a plunge, so I tried to fix things to prevent it.

Olaf, two o' the Simpson boys, Promotheus, Tillte, Slim,
Horace, and myself lined up as bein' still in workin' order;
but while he was in the act of claimin' to be all right. Slim
doubled up in a faint, and we found he had been bad hurt

THE NIGHT-ATTACK 395

without even himself knowin' of it ; so countin' Horace who
had two black eyes and a shot through the fore-arm, the'
was seven of us able to get about purty nimble. Hid away
in the cave, somewhere, were Ty Jones, Pepper Kendal, and
the Chink, unhurt so far as we knew, and two others, still
probably able to help a little.

We placed a couple o' logs again' the fake drawers in the
library, and left Tank to take charge of the prisoners and
the cabin. Then we rustled up some tarps from the bunk-
shack, and prepared to camp near the openin' with a man
alius on guard, to prevent them from comin' out — and the
Friar from goin' in. We kept a lantern lit under shelter of
a rock, and made ready to rest up a bit.

I had told all the fellers to watch the Friar close, for he
just simply couldn't get the upper hand of himself. He
tried his best to simmer down and go to sleep, but every few
minutes he'd boil over again. I lay awake in my tarp
watchin' him for some time ; but I was so sore and weary
myself I could scarcely recall what business I was on, and
first I knew I had drifted off — and been shook awake again.
Promotheus was bendin' over me with the news 'at the
Friar had decided to go into the tunnel, and they could n't
hold him back. I sprang up and started for the opening
with the rest following me. Dan Simpson had relieved The
on watch and when he found what was in the Friar's mind,
he had crept down and told The, who had awakened the rest
of us.

We reached the Friar, just as he was goin' into the openin'.
I called to him in a low tone ; but he only shook his head.
It was eleven o'clock, and the shadow from the moon had
already crept out from the base o' the cliff almost to the
openin'. I saw that the Friar had took the bit ; so I whis-

396

FRIAR TUCK

pered to the others : " I am goin' in there with him ; bu
more 'n this would be bad. We 'd be in each other's waj
Listen and watch, but do not loUow us in."

" I know the way as well as you, and we could keep sid
by side," sez Promotheus ; but I shook my head.

He came over to the openin' and said in a low tone :
haven't time to make you understand; but — but I jo;
have to go in with you."

" If you come, the rest '11 come too," sez I, exasperated,

" You fellers stay here," sez he to them in a pleadin' tone
" but I have reasons. I just have to go in."

So we shed our boots and started down the incline aft(
the Friar, Promotheus touchin' my feet with his fingers i
eve-y step I crav.led. I did n't want to be there, I could n
see how we could do any good ; but the Friar had made ir
world for me, such as it was, and I understood better 'n tl
rest what was gnawin' at his heart ; so I had n't any choic
I had to go in, and somethin' inside Promotheus drove hi
in also. The only crumb o' comfort I could find, lay in tl
fact that Horace had been winged, and so could n't foller i
whether he wanted to or not.

Eia ,,i

CHAPTER FORTY-TWO

HAND TO HAND

At first it was black as pitch ; but I crawled as fast as I
could in the hope of catchin' up with the Friar. It is in-
stinct with most men to follow the right wall when goin'
through a strange place in the dark, though I never could
see why. A man carries his weapon in the right hand and
naturally ought to be as free with it as possible. Still, most
men do it, so I foUered the right wall, hopin' each time I put
out my hand it would touch the Friar.

After a time, I saw a faint glimmer o' light to the left,
and I stopped and pointed it out to The. We came to the
conclusion that they had a candle lighted in the offset where
we had come upon the body, and we discussed whether they
were likely to be in there, or had gone on farther back and
left the light to see any one who tried to crawl after 'em.
I held out 'at they would n't expect any one to crawl after
'em ; but The said 'at Ty would be likely to go into just such
a place himself, and so would expect others to do the same.
Ty certainly had the way of impressin' his own men.

When we got a little closer, I lay flat and scanned along
the floor, tryin' to make out the Friar between me and the
light ; but I could n't see him, and we went on again. I hope
I may never have to do any more such work as this. Creepin'
along in the dark cats up a feller's nerve like a forest fire.

When wc got so close 'at I could see my hands by the
light, I sent The across to the other side, remindin' him to

"it

398 FRIAR TUCK

knock his teeth should he chance upon the Friar, or in cas<

we come together again, ourselves.

Then I lay flat with my hat down low. and hudged mysdl
along with my elbows and toes. I could n't even make ou
The across the tunnel, which was only about twelve fee
w.de, and just for the fraction of a second it came acros
me that he l.ad formerly been a Cross-brander, himself ; bu
this thought didn't live long enough to draw its seconi

breath.

Finally I reached the spot where the light threw a splasl
on the walls and floor, and I made my gun ready and stuc
out my neck in what was the most breathless silence I eve
tried to listen to. Across the splash o' light in front of mi
all was a solid wall o' darkness ; and I 'd have paid ov(
quite a sum to know what eyes were lookin' out of it.

Farther and farther I pushed myself into the light withoi
seein' a thing; until finally I saw the candle, itself, and b
side it — the Friar.

I wriggled across the tunnel just as The crept into tl
room from his side, and we felt a little better to be in tl
light, together again. The body still lay again' the wall, ar
The looked at the face; but he didn't know it. The Fri;
had n't seen or heard anything, either ; and we were up
tree to the top branches. We talked it all over, tryin"
imagine what we would do under the same circumstance
and finally decided they had gone on down the tunm
leavin' a man on guard just below the light, and that ti
man had gone to sleep.

" Well," sez I after we had discussed things around in
circle for a while, " here we are holed up again, as cozy as
cavey o' rats with traps set at all the openin's and en-thu
astic terrier dogs diggin' down from above. If it 's not be

HANDTOHAND 399

too inquisitive, Friar, what plan did you have in comin' down

here?"

" I wanted to be close to her." sez Friar Tuck. " I kept
thinkin' o' how lonely .t must be for her through the dark,
and I hoped the' mi^ht be some chance o' helpin' her to
escape. I did not have any definite plan — only faith and
hope."

" Like the shark which swallered the parasol," sez I, for
I was consid'able put out ; " he had faith in his digestion
and hoped the parasol was some new sort o' health- food.
But to get down to facts — Have you any weapon with
you, and are you willin' to fight ? "

" I have no weapon," sez the Friar ; " but I am willin'
to do whatever seems best. I am trusting in the same power
which upheld Gideon, and I ask to see no farther than he

saw.

This was the Friar all right, so I merely swallowed a
couple o' times and did n't say anything. Whether he lived
or died was the same to the Friar, as whether he lived in
Idaho or Montana would be to another man; so I saved
myself a certain amount of irritation by just thinkin' quietly
as to what was best for us to try. Fact was, I did n't take
as much stock in Gideon just then as I did in Ty Jones.

" I '11 tell you what I think is best," I sez after a bit ; " for
me to crawl down the hall in the hope that the watcher
really has gone to sleep ; while you two stand ready in this
offset. If they chase me, I '11 run up the tunnel, and you
spring out and take 'em at a disadvantage as they go by."

0' course they both wanted to do the crawlin', but it was
my plan, so I stuck out for it, and started. I was really glad
to be out o' the light again, and I crawled as gentle as though
crossin' a bridge of eggs. Before long my fingers struck a

^'t

400 FRIAR TUCK

boot, and I felt of it ex-treme-lcc careful. If ever I gc
blind, my experience durin' those days will help - msidabl
in transferrin' my eyesight to my finRcrs.

The feller had toppled over again' the right wall, and
crept up alongside, holdin' my gun by the barrel, and read;
to swat his head as soon as I had located it ; but the' wa
no use - - the man had already died. He had been shot tvvici
but they thought he could last a while on guard, and tlii
was why we had been able to cross the lighted place.

Just beyond this, I came upon another offset, on the oppc
site side from where the candle was. We had n't notice
it that mornin' 'cause we ha a gone out along the other wal
I heard some heavy breathin' in here; but I also heai
some one tossin' about an' mutterin', and I hardly dared ri:
an examination. I looked back at the splash of light, at
it seemed mighty cheery and sociable, compared with tl
darkness and company I was in.

It 's astonishin' the way pictures fly across a feller's niii
at such a time : I saw the boy down at the foot of the staii
I saw him as he must have been, a few years before soi
quick, rash deed of his had drawn a veil across the lauglii
in his eyes ; I saw the feller in the offset, and wondered h(
much it had taken to turn the expression of his face it
that beastlike hunger for revenge, and then dozens
schemes and plans for capturin' Ty began to flash upon ti
but each time, the presence of the woman spoiled eve
thing. They had used her for a shield once, they would
it again, and I could n't see a way to get around her.

We knew 'at Ty had vowed he would never be taken all
and I could n't see what we would do with him even if
did take him alive ; but I could see that he would take r'(
ure in draggin' as big a bunch into the next world with 1

HAND TO HAND

401

as possible, and yet every scheme 'at came to me was blocked
by the presence of the woman. Finally I crept a little way
into the offset. My hand touched a piece of cloth, I felt
over it with nothin' except the ridges on my fingers touchin' ;
but just when I made sure it was the Chink, he moved and
sat up. I stopped breathin* ; but after a minute, he sighed
and settled back.

I waited a little longer and then crawled back and told
what I had discovered. " H the' was only some way we
could throw a light into that offset," sez I. " I think we could

fix 'em."

We studied over this for some time before the Friar
thought up a way which seemed worth tryin'. I said I 'd
go back and stay at the far side o' the openin', and when
they brought the rope back, to come right on with it along
the left wall, and I 'd knock my teeth together to show it was
me — provided I was still there and able. So the Friar
pulled off his boots, and The kept watch in the offset while
the Friar ran back. I thought it must be several days since
we'd come in, but he looked at his watch before startin',
and it was only two o'clock.

From where I was, I could make out the shape o' the feller
they had put on watch, and knew I could keep cases on all
within the little rock room After an age, I saw two forms
creep like ghosts out of tl .* dark beyond the candle, and ooze
into the offset without makin' a sound. Then in a moment,
Promotheus came stealin' along the wall with the end of
the rope. I made my signal to him, and he went on down
the tunnel, slowly pullin' the rope after him.

I was mighty curious to see how they had fixed the lan-
tern, which they were to light with the candle in the offset,
and it made me feel a lot better when it came out of the

402

tl 1

,'''

ll*-

FRIAR TUCK

recess. Horace had done the fixin', I afterward found out,
and it had nearly broke his heart not to come in with it
but he realized that it was necessary to have an outer guard
so he had stayed with the two Simpson boys. He had pui
the lantern into a box after nailin' a couple o' short piece-
of rope on the bottom for runners ; and now it came slidin
along without makin' a sound. He had sawed a piece out o
the side, so that all the light came up again' the ceilin', am
onto the side where the openin' was.

Slowly it came along, and I stood in the shadow watchir
it. Finally it fell on the face of the man lyin' near th
openin', and I saw he was one of those who had been a
Skelty's that night — for all I know, it was his hand I ha
seen raisin' the window to my room. Next, it lighted u
the openin', itself; and then The stopped puUin' and crei
up opposite me. We heard 'em sighin' and groanin', in th
recess, and finalW the woman's voice gave a weary moan i
she came awake.

In a second, Ty's voice was heard, askin' what was tl
matter ; and we all braced up our nerves. A weak, delirioi
voice started to babble, but it was broken by a shot, and
bullet ripped through the box, but without puttin' out tl
light. I started across the hall ; but The had already se*
it, and had taken the rope and ran down the tunnel with
He turned the box, so 'at just the left edge o' the Hg
touched the openin', and then came across to my side. V
were n't in a black shadow now ; but still, with the light
their faces, it would have been hard to see us.

A hand reached out of the openin', and fired in our din
tion, I dropped to my knee and aimed at the hand, lat neitl
shot counted; and for the next few minutes, all we hea
was that weak voice, babblin' indistinctly. It had n't work

%
f

HANDTOHAND 403

out as I thought it would. I figured that they'd be sur-
prised when the light shone in their faces, and would rush
out and give us a chance. Now that it was too late, I thought
up half a dozen better schemes.

Even while I was thinkin' up a perfect one, I saw a form
come out from the recess, and threw my gun up — but I
did n't snap the hammer. It was the woman, and behmd her
I could make out the shaved head o' the Chinaman.

We all stayed silent for some time, an' then Ty's voice
said: "Well, what kind of a settlement do you fellers

want?"

He spoke as self-composed as though puttm through a .
beef-dicker, and no reply was made for several seconds.
Then, as no one else spoke, I sez: " All we want is just the
woman and what 's left o' your outfit, Ty."
" Who 's that speakin' ? " sez Ty.
" He 's generally called Happy Hawkins, Ty," sez I.
" Who 's in charge o' your gang? " sez he.
"Dinky Bradford," sez I after thinkin' a moment; "but
I 'm delegated to speak for him."

" Tell ya what I '11 do," sez Ty ; " I '11 trade ya the woman
for Dinky Bradford an' the Singin' Parson. Send those
two in to me, and I '11 send her out to you."

This was the foolest proposition ever I heard of. The
woman would n't 'a' been any use to us without the Friar.
" Dinky Bradford is guardin' the mouth o' the tunnel," sez
I ; " but he would n't stand for any such nonsense, nohow."
" Is the preacher here?" asked Ty.
"Yes, I am here," sez the Friar, steppin' out from the
offset and comin' toward us. Olaf, who was with him,
caught his arm and kept him from exposin' himself.

" Damn you," sez I'y, slow an' deliberate. " I hate you

ii m

^ i-' .

:^1'

404 FRIAR TUCK

worse 'n any man in this territory. You 're at the bottorr
of all this kick-up. You 're the one which has turned mj
own men again' me ; and all I ask is a chance to settle ii
out with you."

"You're mistaken if you think that I advised thii
method," began the Friar; but Ty broke in, and said
"Never mind any o' that preacher-talk. I know what'
what, and I 'm all prepared to have you hide behind you
religion, after havin' started all the trouble. I 'U offer yoi
a plan which any man would accept — but I don't class yoi
as a man. The fair way to settle this would be for the mei
who are with us to empty their guns an' lay 'em on the flooi
then you and me strip to the waist an' fight it out with knives
They have n't anything at stake ; but I suppose you '11 b
true to your callin', and make them take all the risk."

" I want to be true to my callin'," sez the Friar ; " an
fightin' with knives is n't part o' my callin*."

Ty laughed as mean as a man ever did laugh ; and bot
Olaf and I offered to take the Friar's place ; but Ty said h
did n't have anything special again' us any more 'n he 'd ha\
again' the Friar's ridin' boss ; and then he offered to figl
the Friar and Dinky Bradford at the same time.

He kept on roastin' the Friar till I bet I was blushin' ; bi
the Friar just stood out straight in the gloom o' the tunn
and shook his head no. Then the woman took a half ste
forward, an' the Chink jerked her back, twistin' her wri
and makin' her give a smothered scream.

I had moved the box around to give us a little more Ugh
and when she screamed, I saw the blood rush up the Friai
pale face to his eyes, where it burst into flame. Livin' fi
it was, and in a flash it had burned away his religion, li
scruples again' violence, the whole outer shell o' civilizatic

HAND TO HAND

"and

405

the

i '

and left him just a male human with his woman
power of another. " Strip," he said, and his words rolled
down the tunnel like a growl of a grizzly. " Stnp, and
fight for your life, for I intend to destroy you."

I can still hear the laugh Ty gave when the Friar said this.
"Destroy me? "he said. "Destroy me? That 's a good one !
Now, do your men agree to let us go free if I win ? "

" I do," sez The.

" I do," said I, after I *d taken another look at the Friar,
who was already unbuttonin' his shirt.

" I do — if you fight fair," said Olaf slowly.

" Then one of ya hold the lantern while we empty the

guns," said Ty.

I did n't like t.is part of it ; but could n't see any way out ;
so while The held the lantern, one on each side emptied a
gun and tossed it to the center of the tunnel. We emptied
all of ours, and they emptied all of theirs, and then while
Ty was takin' off his shirt, I went up to the Friar. When I
saw the taut muscles ripplin' beneath his white skin, I felt
comforted; but when I saw him holdin' his knife point
down, the way they do in the picture-books, I got worried

again.

"Take your knife the other way, Friar," I whispered;
" and strike up under the floatin' ribs on his left side. That 's
the way to his heart."

"I know how to fight with a knife," he snapped; so I
didn't say any more. Horace had become a gun-fighter,
here was the Friar claimin' to know the knife game, and if
the woman had stepped out and challenged the winner to a
fight with stones, why, I was so meek I wouldn't 'a' got het

up over it.

Then Ty Jones came out of the other offset, stripped to

4o6 FRIAR TUCK

the waist also and holdin' his knife in his left hand. The
woman had gone into the niche on our side, me an' Olaf
leaned again' our wall, Pepper Kendal and the Chink leaned
agam' the wall opposite us, The held up the lantern, and for
a full minute the only sound was the wounded Cross-brander
babblin' out his delirium back in the cave-room.

Ty was a shade beefier 'n the Friar; but his skin was dull
and the muscles did n't cut oS into the tendons so sharp, nor
they didn't seem quite so springy or well oiled; but there
was half a dozen knife scars on his chest, and he had come
up our way from Mexico.

They walked toward each other, Ty'<, eagle eyes an' wolf-
grm tryin' to beat down the grim set to the Friar's face
They both crouched over an' circled about each other like
a pair o' big cats. Ty made a few lunges, but the Friar par-
ried 'em as simple as though it was a game, and purty soon
Ty was forced to slip his knife to his right hand with the
blade pointin' up for a rip. When he did this, the Friar
smiled, turned his own knife the same way; and I recalled
the Friar havin' told me about learnin' knife tricks from an
I-tahan he had helped back East.

I don't like knife fightin', and I don't approve of it; but
I will say 'at this fight was the cleanest, quickest thing I ever
saw. The Friar was the best man, but Ty was the best
posted; and time and again the Friar saved himself by
foot work. The follered 'em close with his lantern, while
Olaf and I kept a half watch on the two opposite us.

They kept movin' faster and faster and the' was a con-
tinuous spattin' as they parried with their left hands. Finally
the Friar grabbed Ty by the wrist, Ty grabbed the Friar's
wrist at the same time, lowered his head, and butted the Friar
in the pit o' the stomach. It looked bad ; but the Friar had

HAND TO HAND

407

raised his knee and caught Ty on the chin; so they stag-
gered apart and breathed deep for a minute, before beginnin'
again.

The grin had left Ty's face, and it had settled into black
hate. When they began again, the Friar seized Ty's wrist
every chance he got, twistin' it, bendin' the arm, and tryin'
to thrust with his knife ; but Ty was tough and wiry, and
managed to twist out every time. At last the Friar caught
Ty's right wrist, dropped his own knife, ran his head under
Ty's right arm, caught the slack of his right pant leg, gave
a heave and threw him over his head. It was a clean throw
and the Friar stooped, picked up his knife and started for
Ty before he had time to get to his feet. Ty rolled to his
feet and dodged away as though to run, whirled, took the
blade of his knife between thumb and forefinger, and spun
it through the air. It struck the Friar's collarbone, cut a
gash through his shoulder, and twanged again' the wall o'
the tunnel.

The two men eyed each other for a moment, the calm of
victory in the Friar's eyes, the red of baffled hate in Ty's.
They were about eight feet apart. " Will you give up ? "
asked t. Friar.

" No," sez Ty. He doubled up his fists as though to
spring, then whirled and stepped into the oflFset behind him.
In a moment, he came out with a gun in his hai;c

As soon as he had said no, Pepper Kendal an the Chink
had made a dive for the offset, and Olaf and I had made a
dive for them. I got Pepper who was old and stiff, and I
managed to hit him in the center o' the forehead just as
Ty came out with his gun. Olaf was havin' trouble with
the Chink, and I picked up a gun and tapped Pepper on the
head with it, and then turned to knock the Chink. Just as I

it'i

4o8 FRIAR TUCK

turned, I saw the woman walkin' slowly down the tunnel
behind the Friar, and I saw Ty bend his gun on him. Even
then he had to pause a moment to enjoy his deviltry, and I
still see that picture in my dreams — the Friar standin' silent
and proud, with his head thrown back and his level eyes full
on Ty, while back of him stood the woman as unconcerned
as a snow-bird. About six feet beyond 'em stood Promotheus
holdin' the light above his head, while his face seemed
frozen with horror.

For an instant they stood like stone images. Then The
lunged forward and caught Ty's arm, the lantern went out,
I heard one clear report, and one muffled one, and then I
started for 'em. I bumped into a heavy form, two naked
arms went around me in a bear-g^ip, and we rolled to the
floor. The candle in our offset had burned out ; but I knew
it was the Friar, 'cause his was the only smooth face among
us. " This is Happy," I muttered, and we rose to our feet.

A struggle was goin' on beyond us, and I thought it was
Olaf and the Chink ; so I lit a match, knowin' that Ty would
'a' had plenty o' time to get away already. As the match
burned up, I saw the Chink lyin' stretched out, and Olaf and
Ty locked together. Olaf had his leg wrapped around Ty's,
and was bendin' his back. Ty's eyes were stickin' out white
an' gruesome, and he was gurglin' in the throat. Suddenly,
somethin' cracked and they both fell to the floor o' the
tunnel just as the match went out.

I heard hard breathin'. and then Olaf's harsh voice came
out o' the darkness. " Well," he said, " I guess that squares

things."

" What 's happened, what 's happened? " asked a panting
voice, and then I knew 'at Horace had n't been able to stant
it any longer, and had come in, game wing and all

HAND TO HAND 409

"We've settled up with Ty Jones — that's what's hap-
pened," said OUf ; and as we stood there in the gloom, the
drip o' the dawn came roUin' cold and gray down the slant
o' the tunnel; and I shuddered and turned away to find
somethin' for my hands to do.

CHAPTER FORTY-THREE

THE GIFT OF THE DAWN

The first thing I did was to light the lantern, for the day-
light which came down there was too much in keepin' with
the conditions to suit me. Promotheus was doubled up an'
holdin' his side; so the first thing I did was to ask him if
he was bad hurt. The' was a smile on his lips, a regular
satisfied, self-composed smile, but I did n't just like the look
in his eyes.

" Nope, I don't ache at all, Happy," he said in a firm voice;
" but I can't move much. Tend to the others first."

It seems 'at Ty's first shot had hit the woman in the head,
and his next had got The in the side — but The had man-
aged to get the gun away from him, which is why the rest
of us were spared.

The Friar had carried the woman into our offset, and
was rubbin' her wrists and workin' over her, though the'
did n't appear to be much use. She was still alive; but that
was just all, so I left them and examined the rest. Ty was
all twisted out o' shape, and lay with his eyes open, glassy
an' stary and horrible. Olaf had n't had time to quite finish
the Chink, and he was crawlin' down the tunnel when I
nabbed him. Then Horace took the lantern while Olaf and
I hog-tied Pepper Kendal and the Chink.

We next examined the cave-room where Ty had made his
last stand. It was fair-sized an' well stocked, and also had
half a dozen extra guns in it. When I saw these fresh guns,

THE GIFT OF THE DAWN 4"

I gave a low whistle to think what a lot o' suckers we 'd been
to discard our own trumps and set in a game against a
marked deck ; but as the Friar alius said : " Wrong feeds
on death and Right feeds on life ; so the' can't be no doubt
as to the final result, even though things do look blue
sometimes."

There was a fine spring in the corner o' this room — the
same spring which afterwards came out near the mouth of
the ravine and was piped into the old cabin. The wounded
Cross-brander was still babblin', so we fed him some water
and eased him around a little.

Next we went outside and nailed some pieces to a couple
o' light poles, and we were mighty glad to have enough left
to man this vehicle when it was finished, for we were all
purt nigh used up, Tillte, the two Simpson boys, and myself
carried the litter, while Horace ran the illumination, and
Olaf tended to Pepper and the Chink.

We took 'em all out, even to the dead ; and the one at the
foot of the stairs turned out to be the boy, just as I 'd
thought. Next to the woman, with the Friar walkin' beside
her his head on his breast, this trip with the boy cut me
worse 'n any. Promotheus got off three average good jokes
while we were packin' him out, and cheered us up a lot;
but we put Ty Jones down with the dead. As we straight-
ened him out he gave a groan which made us all jump.
The whole thing had become a nightmare, and .we staggered
about like the ingredients of a dream.

The woman's head was shattered on top an' the* wasn't
any hope for her; but still, it gave the Friar comfort to
work over her, so we acted as though we thought she had
a chance. The nearest doctor was at Meltner's stage sta-
tion, a full day's ride. Tillte went after him, while Dan

if "i|

1 L

4ia

FRIAR TUCK

111

Simpson rode over to his father's to break the news an(
bring back Kit. What with the prisoners still on our hand:
the dead to bury, and the wounded to wait on, we were ii
chin-deep ; and the worst of it was, 'at we did n't want th
news to get out. We had tried to settle things withou
botherin' the law, and we preferred to finish that way i
possible.

We buried the four Cross-branders across the crick an(
down stream from the lower ford, and we buried Tir
Simpson just a little way above the upper ford. The Fria
went along and helped dig the graves and carry them t
it ; but he did n't preach nor sing, and his face was drawi
with sorrow.

By evenin' we had got things to some system. Spidei
Tank, Slim, and Horace were able to help quite a little
but Oscar, Tom Simpson, and Promotheus were in hsa
shape; while we had seven prisoners, countin' the Chin!
and seven wounded enemies to look after. The feller Horac
had shot, up on top, got out o' the country, I reckon. Any
way they left him above with the horses, and we never hear
of him again.

or man Simpson, Kit, and the boy arrived durin' th
moonlight, and we were all mighty glad to see Kit, thougl
we hated to face the old man. Still, he was game, and too
it mighty well. Tillte had got a fresh boss at Meltner'
and had started right back with the doctor ; so they arrive
a little after seven next momin'. The doctor was purt
young lookin' to me; but he had a bagful o' shiny instru
ments, and he made himself at home without any fuss. H
had been in a Colorado hospital for two years, a minir
hospital, and he was as familiar with a feller's insides, as
pony is with the range he was foaled on. He had took

THE GIFT OF THE DAWN 4»3

claim near Meltner's, and was able to Ulk a long time on
why it was better for a young doctor to come west.

He praised the Friar's work to the skies — and then
turned in and did it all over to suit himself. He said that
all the wounded stood a good show except the woman,
Promotheus, and Ty Jones. We none of us thought 'at The
was in much danger ; but the doctor shook his head. Ty's
spinal column had been unjointed near the base, and he was
paralyzed from the hips down; but in all that skirmishin',
he was the only one who had n't lost a drop o' blood. The
Friar, himself, had two flesh-wounds beside the one Ty had
give him.

I was with the doctor when he started to work on the
woman's head; but I couldn't stand it. I'm not ovcry
squeamish ; but I own up I could n't stand this ; so I backed
out, leavin' the Friar with his face like chalk, to hand in-
struments while little old Kit held a basin. I hated to leave
'em; but I didn't take a full breath until I was beside
Promotheus again.

His voice had got weaker, but the smile never left his
lips, and it was restful just to sit and watch him. Horace
hovered over him like a young hen, and The drank so much
water, simply to please Horace, that I feared his bones
would dissolve. Horace had told the doctor he would pay
all the bills, and to go the full limit and not try to economize
none on his patch-work. We put the seven prisoners in
the workshop, and slept in tarps around the door, which was
fastened with a chain, so 'at if they got it open, a board
would fall on these sleepin' next, and wake 'em.

The Friar was all for notifyin' the authorities; but old
man Simpson had been a notorious public, or some such
official, back in Vermont and naturally he was up on all

414 FRIAR TUCK

the twists and windin's of the law. He said it would ta
the Su-preme Court itself fifteen years to sift out t
actual legalities of our tangle; and even then he wasi
sure which side would get the worst of it, so he advis
us to just work it out on our own hook, which we had d
cided to do anyway.

For three days, the woman lay in a stupor. Kit had to
me that her skull had n't been actually shattered — that s
had been shot in just about the same way that Olaf ha
but that Nature had counted on Olaf gettin' into some sik
a fix, and had provided for it by givin' him a flint sku
while the woman's skull was n't of much use except in tim
of peace. Kit said the doctor had taken out a few splinte
of bone, and had fastened up the openin', but had said th
was n't any show for her.

On the other hand, Olaf had looked at her careful, ar
had said that all the vital part of her was workin' on ju
this point. He said that the light about her body was I)
blue o' weakness; but that just at this , oint, the' was a coi
stant bulgin' out o' different colors in a way he had ncv(
before seen. The doctor heaved up his eyebrows at Olaf
verdict, anl looked as though he thought perhaps Olaf
brain had been shifted a little out o' line, in spite of h
flint skull.

On the third night I was what the doctor called hi
orderly, and went on duty at midnight. I was sittin' out o
the porch of the old cabin when the Friar came out holdir
his hand across his eye;. We had moved th*; wounded me
over to the bunk-shack, and the woman was in Ty's bedrooir
I did n't speak to him, and he stood leanin' against one o' th
posts for some time without seein' me.

He trembled all over, and his breath came quick ani

THE GIFT OF THE DAWN 415

catchy. Final' looked up at the $tar« and said in a low
tone, as thoug.. kin' personal to some one near at hand :
" Save me, oh God, from mockery I I have spoken for others
in my vanity; and now that my own hour has come, oh
save me from the rebellion of my flesh ; and give me grace
to say in my heart, Thy will be done."

As he stood with his face upraised, the late moon crept
out and shone full upon it, and the agony in it struck me like
a blow; but even as I looked, the change came. Before
my very eyes, I saw the sign of peace made upon the Friar's
brow. A moment before and it had been torn into wrinkles
and covered with beads of sweat ; but now it was smooth
and calm. He clasped his hands across his breast, closed his
eyes, and the' came a smile to his lips which drew a mist
to my own eyes. I can't be absolutely certain of it, because
o' this blur in my eyes ; but I think, I actually and honestly
do think, that I saw white forms hoverin' in the moonlight
above him.

He drew a full breath and turned to go in. but saw me
settin' with my back again' the wall o' the cabin, and came
over and put a hand on my shoulder, I could n't say any-
thing. I wanted to say somethin' to comfort him; but I
couldn't speak a word, until he asked me how the others
were gettin' along. I told him they were all doin' fine, and
that even Ty had been restin' well. He turned to go in,
and then I found the nerve to ask him how things were
inside.

" It is all over, Happy," sez he, without even a catch in
his voice. " Just before I came out here, the doctor said the
pulse had stopped."

He -aught his breath with a little gasp at this ; but that
was all. " What did Olaf say? " I asked.

416 FRIAR TUCK

" Olaf says that she still lives," he answered; " but I fear
that Olaf is not to be relied upon this time. He has a strange
gift; but he does not understand it himself, and while I
know he would not deceive me, I feel that the doctor must
know best."

" Well, I '11 not give up until Olaf does ! " I blurted.

He smiled again and put his hand back on my shoulder.
" Come in and look at her," he said, " she is very beautiful.
The strange mask has fallen from her face, and she is once
more as she was in those old, happy days when we walked
together through our own Garden of Eden. Come in, I
want you to see her."

I went in with him, though I didn't want to. I knew
what love did to a man, and that I hadn't see^* the same
woman he had; but the' was another face alius .fore my
eyes, and no one else was beautiful to me. I did n't want
to do any pertendin' to the Friar, even at such a time as
this.

I follered him inside, f eelin' out o' place and embarassed ;
but when I looked down at the quiet face in the bed, I was
glad I had come. She didn't look like the same woman,
not at all. All the weary, puzzled expression had left her
face, and in spite of its whiteness, it looked like the face of
a girl. I looked at her a long time and the thought that
came to me over and over was, what a shame she could n't
have had just a few words with the Friar before she was
called on ; just a few words, now that her right mind was
back.

After a time I looked up. Kit sat near the head of the
bed, leanin' over and holdin' a handkerchief to her eyes,
Olaf sat near her, a strange, grim set to his lips. His head
was bandaged and he looked less like a human than usual,

THE GIFT OF THE DAWN 417

as he kept his eyes fixed on the white face o' the woman.
The' was a lamp on the stand and I could see his eyes.
Blue they were, deep blue, like the flowers on the benches
in June, and they didn't move; but kept a steady gaze
upon the white, still face. The doctor sat in a corner, his
eyes on the floor. At first I thought he was asleep, and
goodness knows, he was entitled to it ; but just as I looked
at him he rubbed his fingers together a moment and stood up.
He walked over and put his hand on the Friar's shoulder.
" You might as well all go to sleep, now," he said, gently.
" There is nothing more to do."
" Are you positive? " asked the Friar.
" Positive," said the doctor. " There is no heart action,
and when I held a mirror to her lips no vapor was formed."
" She is still alive," said the deep voice of Olaf, and we
all gave a little start.

The doctor took a silver quarter and held it to the woman's
nose for a minute, and then looked at it. A puzzled look
came to his face, and he went back and sat down in the
corner again.
" Was it discolored ? " asked the Friar.
" No," sez the doctor slowly ; " but I am sure there is no
life remaining. I have seen several cases of suspended
anomation, but nothin' like this."
" She lives, and the light is getting stronger," said Olaf.
Kit took the handkerchief from her eyes which were still
full o' tears. She wiped them away, and looked first at the
woman and then at Olaf, and then she gave a sigh. The
Friar's hands were opening and shutting. He had fought
his fight out, on the porch ; but the suspense was beginnin'
to undermine him again.
I went back to the porch and stayed a while. Wlien I

4i8 FRIAR TUCK

went in again, they were all as I had left them ; and after
a few minutes I made my rounds, found everything all right,
and came back. I went into the room several times, and
just as I caught the first whiff o' the dawn breeze, I went
in once more, determined to coax the Friar to lie down and
try to sleep.

They were still in the same positions. Not a line had
changed in the woman's face, the Friar was almost as white
as she was but still stood at the foot o' the bed lookin' down
at her ; while the wrinkles on Olaf 's set face seemed carved
in stone.

I had just put my hand on the Friar's arm to get his at-
tention when Olaf rose to his feet, pressed his hand to his
blinkin' eyes, and said wearily : " The blue color is givin'
way to pink. She will get well."

" Don't say it unless you 're sure t " cried the Friar, his
voice like a sob.

For answer Olaf pointed down at the woman's face. A
faint color stole into her cheeks, and as we looked her eyes
opened. The first thing they rested upon was the Friar's
face bent above her, and her lips parted in a wondcrin'
smile — a smile which lighted her face like the mornin' sun
on ol' Mount Savage, and made her beautiful, to me an' to
all who 've ever seen her.

" Is it you? " she whispered. " Is it really you? "

A warm, rosy beam of sunshine slipped in through the
window and fell across the bed, and the rest of us tiptoed
out, leavin' the Friar alone with the gift of Hfe which the
Dawn had brought back to him.

warn

CHAPTER FORTY-FOUR

TY JONES NODS HIS HEAD

It was a week after this before Olaf could see properly
again. The doctor was wild to take Olaf back East and hold
doin's with him ; but Olaf would n't listen to it. He hated
to have people take him for a freak, and said it was n't any
fault of his that he saw the way he did. The doctor said 'at
what Olaf saw was called the aurora ; he said that science
had been tryin' to locate it, but had n't found any way to do
it, and that it was some sort o' rays shootin' out from this
which had put the inflammation into Olaf's eyes.

Olaf had had one of his teeth filled when he was young,
and ever since that he 'd been suspicious o' science ; so he
just clouded up his face when they tried to devil him into
bein' an experiment, and they couldn't do anything with
him. The Friar might have been able to, but the Friar
would have sent his own eyes East by freight before he 'd
have asked Olaf to do a single thing he did n't want to do.
The ignorant alius scoflf at the idee of Olaf seein' the soul-
flame; but the edicated alius take a serious interest which
seems mighty funny — don't it?

From the very moment Janet opened her eyes and smiled
up at the Friar that mornin' she continued to improve. The
doctor listened to all that was told him about her havin'
pains in the top of her head and not bein' right intellectu-
ally, and he said she must have had a blow there at some
former time which had probably formed a tumor on the

420

FRIAR TUCK

brain or knocked off a few splinters of bone into it, and tha
in removin' the pressure, she had been put into perfect orde
again.

She had the smoothest voice I had ever heard, and I ji,s
doted on hearin' her speak the Friar's name, John Car
michael. I had a legal right to use the name John, myself
but it alius had the feel of a stiff collar to me, so I was glad
enough to have it forgotten. But when Janet spoke the
words John Carmichael, why, it cleared up the atmosphere
and started a little breeze. She didn't recall how she had
come to Cross Crick, nor anything much which had hap-
pened to her since the night in Berlin. She said she had took
smgin' lessons in a place called Italy, and had expected to
reach grand opery.

She had sung for pay whenever she got a chance, in order
to get money enough to go on with her studies, and was
gettm' what I 'd call mighty lucrative wages at the Winter
Garden; but was all the time bothered by a lot o' foreign
dudes who had the desire to make love, but not the capacity.
She said her manager had introduced an Austrian count for
advertizin' purposes, and she had finally consented to eat
a meal with him; but had been taken sick and had fallen
This was when she had bumped her head and she never got
clear in it again until that morning when she had hovered
between goin' out with the night or comin' back with the
dawn.

She said she had a hazy, dreamlike remembrance of havin'
tried all kinds o' work after this; but couldn't tell the rea!
from the unreal; and she didn't have any recollection of
how she had come to the ranch. We never mentioned Tv
Jones to her for she was comin' along like a colt on grass,
and we did n't want to risk any set-back. She said she still

TY JONES NODS HIS HEAD 421

had it on her mind that she had lost something precious;
but she could n't make out what it could have been, and the
Friar alius told her not to worry, but to just rest herself
back to complete strength.

Oscar and Tom Simpson had turned the corner, and it
was only a question of time when they 'd be all right again
— which was true of all the others except Ty and Promo-
theus. Ty wouldn't speak to us at all, though he didn't
seem to suffer to amount to anything. The doctor said he
might live for years, or he might slip away at a moment's
notice ; but either way, he was doomed to be paralyzed for
the rest of his life ; while the' was n't any hope for Promo-
theus at all.

He had been shot through the liver, which pleased him a
lot as bein' so in keepin' with his name ; but we could n't
see why a feller who had survived bein' shot in so many
other places, should have to give in on account of an extra
hole in his liver. Horace divided his time between waitin'
on The and spurrin' up the doctor to try some new treatment.
He read aloud to The out o' Ty's books, and he seemed as
fond o' those old Greek fellers as Horace was himself. He
was also mighty pleased to have the Friar read and talk to
him, and it softened us all a lot to see how patient and gentle
Promotheus had become. Humanity is about the finest thing
the' is about a human; and all humans have a showin'
growth of it, if ya can just scratch the weeds away and give
it a chance.

The prisoners bothered us a heap ; we feared they might
have some leanin's toward revenge ; so we did n't dare turn
'em loose until they showed some decided symptoms of
repentance. Finally we got to bringin' 'em up two at a time
to talk with The. At first it did n't do any good, as Ty sat

422

FRIAR TUCK

111

r i

I U

propped up in a bunk, grinnin' scornful, while The lay flat
on his back lookin' mighty weak and wan ; but after several
trials at it, they seemed to pay more heed to what The told
'em. We figured that Ty must have ten or a dozen men still
out on the range somewhere ; but they never showed up.

In about two weeks, or it might 'a' been three, all the
wounded were able to walk about except Promotheus, Ty
Jones, and Oscar. Oscar was doin' fine; but the noise of
the other men bothered The a little at night, though he
denied it up and down. Still, we thought best to move him
and Ty to a couple o' cots at the east end of the mess-hall,
which was large and airy, with a big fireplace for cool
nights. By this time Janet was able to take short walks,
leanin' on the Friar's arm ; but the Friar had n't come any
closer to findin' out what it was she had lost, nor whether
or not she was Ty's wife. The only reply Ty ever made to
questions, was to skin back his lips in a wolf-grin.

The used to lay with his eyes fixed on Ty's face an J a
look of hopeless sadness in his own. When we 'd come and
talk to him, his face would light up ; but as soon as we left
him, he would look at Ty again with a sorrow that fair
wrung a feller's heart. I wanted to separate 'em ; but when
I suggested this to The, he shook his head. " Nope," he
said, " he may speak to me before the vultures finish with
my liver ; and if ever the mood crosses his mind for a sec-
ond, I want to be so handy 'at he won't have time to change
his mind."

I told The 'at what was worryin' the Friar most was that
all the fightin' had been on his account ; but that next to this,
it was because he did n't know whether or not Ty was mar-
ried to Janet.

That evenin' just when the thinky time o' twilight came

TY JONES NODS HIS HEAD 423
along, I was settin' by the fire in the mess-hall, where I could
see Ty, and his face did n't have quite so much the eagle
look to it as common. The's eyes rested on Ty's face most
o' the time, and he, too, noticed it bein' a little less fierce

than usual.

" Ty," he said in a low tone, " I was drove into turnin'
again* ya. Not by force, ya understand, nor by 'ear; but
by something which has crept into me durin' the last few
years, and which I can't understand, myself. Horace and
the Friar have been mighty good to me — they saved my
life, ya know, after I had forfeited it by raidin' 'em durin*
the night. I told 'em I would n't be a spy on you about any-
thing else except the woman. You haven't much excuse
to bear me any ill will, seein' as it was your own hand which
shot the move-on order into me. I 'm goin' to slip out
yonder before long ; but the's no knowin' how long you '11
have to sit penned up in a chair."

The's voice gave out here, and he stopped a few minutes
to cough. Ty's face had n't changed, and his eyes looked
out through the south window to where the western sky
was still lighted into glory by the rays o' the sun, which had
already sunk.

" I 've been locked up in a stone prison, Ty," said Pro-
motheus as soon as he had quieted down again ; " and I
want to tell you that the minutes drag over ya like a spike-
tooth harrow, when you have n't nothin' to look at but four
gray walls and the pictures on your memory. A feller feeds
himself on bitter recollections in order to keep his hate lusty ;
but all this pilin' up o' hate is just one parchin' hot day
after another — like we've had this Summer. Everything
green and pleasant in a feller's nature is burned down to the
roots, and in tryin' to hate all the world, he ends by hatin'

iji

424 FRIAR TUCK

himself worst of all. Every kindly deed he 's done seem«
like a soothin' shower, and counts a lot in keepin' him from
fallin' down below the level o' snakes and coyotes.

" I 'm not preachin' at ya, I 'm tellin' you just what I know
to be so from actual experience. I don't bear you no ill will,
Ty, whether you tell me what I want to know, or not ; but
you have it in your power to give me more content than air)
other man in all the world. Are you married to the woman
Ty?"

For a moment Ty did n't move, and then his lips tightened
and he nodded his head. Promotheus gave a sigh and set-
tled back. He stayed quiet for some time and then said in
a weak voice: "Thank ya, Ty. I 'm purty certain that at
such a time as this, you would n't deceive me. I 'm sorry
you are married to her — on the Friar's account, under-
stand—but I 'm mightily obliged to you for tellin' me the
truth. The Friar is a square man, and he 's a strong man.
He '11 be able to fight what he has to fight ; but none of us
can fight uncertainty, without losin' our nerve in the end.
I wish you would talk to me, Ty. I thought more o" you
than of airy other man I ever knew, except Horace and the
Friar; and I wish, just for old time's sake, you 'd talk to me
a little before I slip away. You can talk, can't ya ? "

" Yes, I can talk," sez Ty Jones, facin' The with a scowl;
" but I have n't any talk I want to waste on traitors. If I
was to speak at all, it would be to ask 'em to separate me
from your sloppy yappin'. You may think 'at you sound as
saintly as a white female angel when you whine about duty
and forgiveness and such-like rubbish; but the more oil
you put on your voice, the more I know you to be a sneak,
a hypocrite, and a traitor. I won't ask 'em to move me;
because I 'm not in the habit of askin' any man. When I

TY JONES NODS HIS HEAD 4^5
had two legs to stand on, I gave orders. Now that I can't
give orders, I don't speak at all ; but every time you try to
speak like a hen-missionary, you can know that I 'm sayin'
to myself — sneak, hypocrite, traitor ! "

One thing you '11 have to say about Ty Jones, an' that is,
that when he started north, he did n't wobble oflf to the east
or west much, let what would come in his path. The only
reply The made was to sigh ; but what I wanted to do, was
to lull Promotheus into a deep sleep, and then to fasten Ty
Jones's neck to a green bronco, and let them two settle it out
between 'em which was the tougher beast. What I did do,
was to steal out and tell Horace what had been said, and I
also told him not to separate Ty and Promotheus as I
thought The would set him an example which might finally
soften him a little and make him more fit to die, when the
time came 'at some quick tempered individual lost patience
and tried to knock a little decent conversation out of him
with an ax.

Horace, though, thought only o' The, and he hurried in
and sat beside him. I also went in and took my seat by the
fire again. Horace took The's hand in one of his and patted
it with the other. Horace did n't have any upliftin' words
to match the Friar's; but he had some chirky little ways
which were mighty comfortin' to The, and when Horace
would be with him, all the sadness would leave his eyes, and
he would talk as free as he thought — which, to my mind,
is the final test of genuwine courage.

Mighty few of us can do it. I know I can't. Time and
again, I have had deep feelin's for some one in trouble ; but
when I 'd try to put 'em into words, the knees o' my tongue
would alius knock together, and I 'd growl out somethin'
gruff, cough, blow my nose, and get into a comer as soon as

!!;

. I

i-1l

4^6 FRIAR TUCK

possible. The Friar was the first man who ever showed ine
'at a feller could speak out his sc mess without losin' any of
his strength, and I have honestly tried to do it myself ; but
I generally had to dilute it down over half, and even then,
it alius sounded as though I had wrote it out and learned it
by heart.

The asked Horace to either move him or Ty, said he did n't
feel quite comfortable beside Ty, and made out that it was
his own wish ; but Horace vetoed the motion, and pertended
to scold The for not havin' a more forgivin' nature. T»ic
thought he had been as circumspect as a land agent, and
when his request rebounded back on him, he found himself
without any dry powder.

He lay quiet for some time, and then spoke in so low a
tone I could hardly hear him. " I can understand the real
Promotheus purty well, Horace," sez he; "and I've tried
to be as game as he was ; but I can't quite understand the
One the Friar tells about. I have thought of Him a heap
since I 've been laid up this time ; but I don't believe I could
bring myself to forgive them who had nailed me on a cross
for doin' nothin' but good — I don't believe I could do that.
" I can feel things clearer now 'n I ever could before ; and
when I picture my own self as hangin' from nails drove
through my hands and feet, it just about takes my breath
away. I 've been handled purty rough in my time, but alius
when my blood was hot, and pain don't count then ; but to
have nails drove— My God, Horace, that's an awful
thought I That 's an awful thought.

"Then, too, I don't feel that any one has ill used me
lately. The treatment I got in the army, and in the pen, was
consid'able hellish ; but I have n't had much chance to try
forgivin' any one for the last few years. Horace, you can't

TY JONES NODS HIS HEAD 4^7
imagine all the joy the last part of my life has been to me.
I didn't know what life really was, until you and the Friar
pointed it out to me. I 've been so happy sometimes it has
hurt me in the throat ; and now that I 'm goin' on, I don't
want to cause any one any bother. I asked Ty to tell me
if he was married to the woman, and he did tell me. I 'm
sorry to say 'at he is married to her. Horace ; but I 'm thank-
ful to Ty for tellin' me. He don't feel easy near me; so I
wish you 'd move me back to the bunk-shack."

It was some minutes before Horace could speak, and when
he did, he had to put on pressure to keep his voice steady.
" I don't care one single damn what Ty Jones wants," sez
he. " Let him stay right where he is and learn the meanin'
of friendship from the best friend a man ever had." After
which Horace gave The's hand a grip and hurried out of the
room.

CHAPTER FORTY-FIVE

THE LITTLE GUST O' WIND

I HA. seen some mighty quick changes brought about by
flood o' circumstances breakin' on a man all of a «udden -
or Cast Steel Judson, himself, had melted and run into a ne'
mold the night o' Barbie's weddin' — but I never saw such
a complete change as had took place in The since I 'd first
seen him. He loved devilment then, like a bear loves honey;
while now he had swung back with the pendulem clear to
the other side, until he was more unworldly 'n the Friar him-
self. It was n't what he said 'at made a feller feel funny
inside, it was his eyes. His eyes were all the time tryin* to
♦ell things 'at his tongue could n't frame up, and it acted like
brakes on a feller's breathin' apparatus.

I asked the Friar about it one evenin' while we were
walkin' back through the ravine. He walked along with his
brows wrinkled a few minutes, and then said: "You see.
Happy, the whole human race is made up o' millions of in-
dividuals, and each one is some alike and some different. A
man goes through childhood, youth, his fightin' period, an.i
old age ; and the race has to do the same thing.

" Now, ages ago when the childhood o' the race bcj^ati.
folks were downright primitive; they used stone axes, skins
for clothing, and ate raw flesh. They were fierce, impul-
sive, passionate, just like children are if you watch 'em close
enough ; but they lived close to nature, just like the children

THE LITTLE C.UST O' WIND 4^9
do, and their bodies were vigorous, and their minds were like
dry sponges, ready to absorb whatever fell "r • . 'em.

" The outdoor man of to-day is still primitive ; he delights
in his dissipations, and recklessness, but the grim, set face
which he wears, is a mask. The rich, pure air is all the time
washin* his body clean, his active life keeps his nerves sound
anr! ! v ui i*c, and his heart is like the heart of a little child —
Vunpt tor p - 1 or evil, and needin' a guiding hand all the

time,

*' 1 ti tlie .Tiornin' i child is so full o' life that words don't
M .an mucM .o him . ' ut when the play o* the day is over, he
corr's li. tne, .hroui.h the twihght shadows, bruised an' dis-
apv >in d nn' purt; well tired out. All day long he 's waged
hiS lit.le wa:'^ : hut now he is mighty glad to pillow his he^d
clr.r; 'vs it-otl cr's heart; and then it is that the seeds o'
gentiu.w« aic easiest sprouted. This is the twilight time
for Promotheus."

We did n't have anything more to say on this walk ; but
we both had plenty to think of. It alius seemed to me that
in some curious way, the Friar, himself, was better 'n his own
religion. His religion made badness a feller's own fault;
but after gettin' to know the Friar, it alius made ya feel
more like takin' some share in the other feller's sin, than like
pointin' your finger at him and sayin' he never was any good,
nohow.

A couple o' days a v^r this, the doctor told us that the
sands were runnin' m^ ity low in The's hour-glass, and it
would n't be long to the end ; but still we could n't believe
it. He did n't look bad, nor he did n't suffer ; and we had
seen him come back from the grave almost, that time at
Olaf 's when Horace had claimed his life, and had saved him
in spite of himself.

llil'ilj*

ii !

430 FRIAR TUCK

Then again, the doctor had missed it on Janet, and vn
were all hopin' he'd, get slipped up on again; but Tli
himself seemed to side with the doctor, and Olaf took on
long look, an' then shut his lips tight an* shook his heac
The said he wanted to live, and had done all he could t
get a clinch on life; but that it was slippin' away fror
him drop by drop, and he couldn't stay with us mud
longer.

He seemed to want us about him, so we dropped in and sai
beside him as long as we could keep cheerful. All througli
the afternoon he lay with a serious, gentle smile on his lips,
but the sadness was mostly gone, even from his eyes. I
closed my own eyes as I sat beside him, and called up the
picture o' Badger-face the day he had wanted to lynch Olaf.
Then I opened my eyes and looked at the real Promotheus,
and I understood what the Friar meant by bein' born
again.

I spoke o' this to or Tank Williams, and he fired up at me
as though I had poured red pepper in the nose of a slecpin'
cripple. "You're a nice one, you are!" sez he. "Id
sooner fill myself with alcohol and die in a stupor than to
call up The's past at such a time as this. You ought to be
ashamed o* yourself,"

The' was no way to make Tank see what I meant so I
sent him in to set with The a while, and took a little walk
up the ravine. Every step I took brought some memory 0'
the time The and Horace and I had first started to find out
^bout the woman; and it was n't long before I was rcdy to
turn back.

Janet was quite strong by this time, though she still had
to wear a bandage; and after supper, the Friar took her in
to see Promotheus. He had told her all about him, and she

THE LITTLE GUST O' WIND 431
was mighty so/rv to think 'at his end was near. She did n't
recall havin' been kind to him when he was playin' cripple ;
but the Friar had told her about this, too. Horace had told
the Friar about what Ty had sa'd, and it had cut him purty
deep; but he had braced up better 'n we expected. We
did n't any of us know what effect bringin' Janet in si£ ht o'
Ty would have, and when she came into the mess-hall, we
watched purty close.

Ty sat propped up, with his clenched hand restin' outside
the blanket, and an expression on his face like that of a
trapped mountain-lion. He glared up at her as she came
near; but she only looked at him with pity in her eyes, and
she didn't seem to recognize him, at all — just looked at
him as though he was a perfect stranger which she was sorry
for, and Tank, who was settin' next me, gave me a nudge
in my short ribs, which was about as delicate as though it
had come from the hind foot of a mule. " Well? " I whis-
pered. " What do ya mean by that ? "
" Could n't ya see 'at she did n't know him ? " sez Tank.
" That 's nothin'," sez I. " He knew her all right."
" Yes, but Great Scott," sez he, " a man can't claim that
a woman 's his wife if she don't know him, can he ? "

" Pshaw," sez I, " if you 'd settle things that way, the'
would n't be any married people left. The' ain't one woman
in fifty 'at knows her husband, and the' ain't any men at all
who know their wives."

" You 're just dodgin' the question," sez Tank. " I claim
that if a man marries a woman when she 's out of her mind,
he ain't got any claim on her when she gets back into her
mind again."

" Look here, Tank," sez I ; " you 've never had much ex-
perience with the world, 'cause every time you went where

432

FRIAR TUCK

experience was to be had, you got too intoxicated to tal
notice ; but I 'm tellin' you the truth when I say that
women did n't sometimes get out o' their right minds, the
would n't get married at all."

" Aw, shut rp," sez Tank.

Janet had gone over to Promotheus, and was smoothii
his forehead. She had a beautiful, shapely hand, and
made me feel a little wishful to watch her. The lay pei
fectly still, and his sensations must 'a' been peculiar. T
Jones did n't even look at 'em. He kept his brows scowlei
down and his gaze ou' the south window.

Presently Janet turned and walked out to the porch. I
was an unusually warm night, and she sat there alone, whil
the Fri?r came back to The. Horace had gone off by himsel
to get a grip on his ^eelin's; but he came in about nim
o'clock, and went up and took The's hand. " Well," sez he
" have you finally got over your nonsense? I have a let o
plans I want to carry out, and you know I can't have yot
loafin' much longer."

Nothin' suited The so well as to have a little joke put at
him ; but he did n't have any come-back to this. He caught
at his breath a time or two, and then said : " I can't do it,
this time, Horace. I hate to disappoint ya — I've been
countin' on what a good time we were goin' to have — up
there in the hills — but I can't come back this time — I.
can't, quite, make it."

He ended with a little gurgle and sank back on the pillow.
Horace shook him a little and then flew for the doctor, who
was on the porch o' the old cabin. They were back in half
a minute, Horace pushin' the doctor before him ; and we all
held our breaths when he felt The's pulse. The doctor
squirted somethin' into The's arm, and after a bit, he opened

IJBW

THE LITTLE GUST O' WIND 433
his eyes with a long sigh, and when he saw Horace bendin'
over him, he smiled. ^

" I mighty near slipped away that time," sez he. -U s
not goin' to be hard, Horace ; and I don't want you to worry.
I feel as comfortable as if I was sleepin' on a cloud, and
there isn't one, single thing to grieve about. I've been
like one o' those hard little apples which take so long to ripen.
I 've hung up on a high bough and the rains beat on me, and
the sun shone on me, and the winds shook me about, and the
birds pecked at me until at last just the right sort o'
weather came along and I became softer and softer, and riper
and riper, until now my hold on the stem begins to weaken.
Purty soon a little gust 'U come along and shake me down
on the green grass; but this is all right, this is perfectly
natural, and I don't want you to feel bad about it.

*' I own up now, that I "ve been afraid o' death all my :-.e ;
but this has passed. I don't suffer a bit ; but I 'm tired, just
that pleasant weariness a feller feels when his last pipe has
been smoked, and the glow o' the camp fire begins to form
those queer pictures, in which the doin's o' that day mingle
with the doin's of other days. I 'm liable to drop off to sleep
at any moment, now ; and 1 'd like -I 'd kind o' like to
shake hands with the boys before I go."

Well, this gave Horace something to do, and he was
mighty glad to do it. After we had all shaken hands with
The, hf narched up the prisoners, even to the Chink, and
they all shook hands, too; and by this time Promotheus was
purty tired ; but he did look unusual contented. He glanced
across at Ty; but Ty had turned his face to the wall, and
The gave a little sigh, settled down into the pillow again, and
closed his eyes. Horace backed around until The could n't
see him, and shook his fist at Ty, good and earnest.

434 FRIAR TUCK

Purty soon a regular grin came to The's face, and he
opened his eyes and looked at the Friar with a twinkle in
'em. " Friar Tuck," sez he, " I don't know as I ever men-
tioned it before, but I '11 confess now that I 'm right glad
I did n't lynch you for stealin' those bosses." He lay there
smilin' a minute, and then held out his hand, " Good-bye,
Horace," he said in a firm voice.

Horace had been doin' uncommon well up to now; but
he could n't stand this. He threw himself on the bed, took
both o' The's hands and looked down into bis face. " Pro-
motheus, Promotheus," he called to him in a shakin' voice.
" Don't give up! You can win if you fight a while longer.
Remember that day in the desert, when I wanted to lie down
and end it all. You said you did n't take any stock in such
nonsense; and you picked me up and carried me over the
molten copper, while queer things came out o' the air and
clutched at us. You reached the water-hole that time, Pro-
motheus, and you can do it again, if you just use all your
might."

Promotheus opened his eyes and his jagged, gnarly teeth
showed in a smile, weak and trembly, but still game to the last
line of it. " Nope," he said so low we could hardly hear
him, " I 'm Promotheus, all right. I hung on as long as I
could; but the vultures have finished my liver at last,
Horace — they have finally finished it. I hate to leave you ;
but I '11 have to be goin' soon. The's only one thing I ask
of ya — don't send a single one o' the boys to the pen.
They don't know what the world really is ; but shuttin' 'cm
out of it won't ever teach 'em. If the's anything you can
do to give 'em a little start, it would be a mighty good thing
— a mighty good thing." His voice was gettin' awful weak,
an' he 'd have to rest every few words.

THE LITTLE GUST O' WIND 435

" And Ty Jones, too," he went on, " Ty was square with
me in the old days. Try to make him understand what it was
'at turned me again' him; and if the's any way to make
things easier for Ty, I want you to have it done. Ty had
a lot o' tough times, himself, before he turned all the hard
part of his nature outside. Don't bear him any malice,
Horace. Seventy times seven, the Friar sez we ought to
forgive, and that many '11 last a long time, if a feller don't
take offence too easy. The's a lot o' things I don't under-
stand; but some way it seems to me that if I could just go
out feelin' I had squared things with Ty, I 'd be a leetle
mite easier in my mind."

Horace stepped to Ty's bed and shook Wm by the arm.
" Did you hear what he said ? " he demanded. " You know
he 's achin' to have you speak to him decent. Why don't ya
speak to him ? "

Ty looked cold and stony into Horace's eyes, and then
took his left hand and pushed Horace's grip from off his
arm. Horace stood lookin' at Ty with his fist clinched.
The turned and saw it and a troubled look came into his
face.

"Friar Tuck," he said, "you meant it, didn't ya — that
about forgivin' seventy times seven ? "

" I did," sez the Friar, his voice ringin' out clear and
strong in spite of its bein' low pitched. " Be at peace, Pro-
motheus, the laws of man are at war with the laws of God ;
but they 're bound to lose in the end. I want you to know
that I forgive Ty Jones as fully as you do — and I shall
do everything in my power to square things up with
him."

The held out his hand to the Friar, and they clasped in a
comrade-grip. " i can trust you," he said ; " and I know

*";T?-t'«»

436

FRIAR TUCK

you '11 do all you can to make Horace see it that way,
too."

" I forgive him, too, you big goose ! " cried Horace. " I
promise you that I '11 do all I can for him — on your account.
Though I must say — but no, I mean it, Promotheus.
I forgive him from my heart, and I '11 be as good a friend
to him as I can."

" Now, let the little gust o' wind come," sez The. " I 'm
perfectly ripe and ready for it, now."

The' was silence for several minutes; and then Promo-
theus said in a faint voice : " Friar, I wish you 'd sing to
me. All my life I 've longed to hear a cradle-song, a regular
baby cradle-song. I know it 's a damn-fool notion ; but I
never had it so strong as I 've got it now — and I wish
you 'd sing one to me. My mother was a widow, mostly.
She cleaned out offices at night to earn enough to keep us
alive. She sacrificed her life for me, but I could n't under-
stand this then.

" Night after night I used to creep in from the street
through dirty, stinkin* halls, and cry myself to sleep. An
achin' came into my heart then which hasn't never quite-
left it; and it was this lonesomeness 'at finally made nu'
run away — leavin' her to face it out — all by herself.

" My blood has turned to water, I reckon, and I feel like a
baby to-night I don't suffer, understand ; I feel as thoii,i,di
I was a little chap again, and that my mother didn't have
to work ; but was holdin* me on her lap. She did hold nie
that way once — the time the ambulance brought my old
man home — but she could n't sing then. It seems to me
that if you 'd just sing me a regular cradle-song — I could
slip away into pleasant dreams."

The Friar cleared his throat a time or two before he

THE LITTLE GUST O' WIND 437

found his voice ; and then he said in a low tone : " I used
to sleep in a store-box, Promotheus, when I was a lad —
and I know exactly what you feel. I '11 sing you a cradle-
song, a song for little children of all ages. It is a great
privilege to be a little child, Promotheus, and — and I wish
you pleasant dreams."

Then Friar Tuck drew a deep, full breath, and held it
down until all the quiver had gone from his lips. When
he started to sing, his voice was low an' soothin', and
full o' tenderness; and after the first line, Promotheus
gave a little sigh o' content, nodded his head, and shut his

eyes.

The' was one tune we every last one of us liked. The
Friar generally sang it to words which began : " Guide me,
O Thou great Jehovah " ; and he usually sang it with a swing
which was like a call to battle; and this time he sang the
same tune, but soft and close and restful, and the words he
used began: "Jesus, tender Shepherd, hear me." These
words sound purty flat when ya give 'em cold; but they
did n't sound empty to us, as we stood lookin' down at Pro-
motheus. All alone, he had taken his chance when he took
on with Ty Jones ; and now he was cashin' in this chance
and it made us mighty sober.

The Friar finished the first four lines alone and then the
angels seemed to join in with him. We had all been purty
certain that the' wasn't nothin' in the shape of earthly
melody fit to hold a candle to the Friar; but just at this
point a new voice joined onto the Friar's which sent a thrill
through ys and made us stop breathin'. A queer, half
frightened look crossed the Friar's face for a second; but
his voice did n't waver for a single note. Instead, the' came
a new tone of thanksgivin* and confidence in it which took

438

FRIAR TUCK

'ti

all the sting out o' death and made it all right and pleasant,
like the cool and restfulncss o' night, after the heat of day.

"Al! this day Thy hand has led me,
And I thank Thee for Thy care;
Thou hast warmed me, clothed and fed me;
Listen to my evening prayer,"

went on the ->ong and the' came an expression of wonder
and of joy into The's tired face.

There are only three little verses to this one, and to fill
out the tunc they had to sing the first one over again, soft
and low. The candles threw a soft glow on The's face which
hid the pallor of it and the rotigh lines, but brought out
all the kindly strength we had come to be so fond of ; and
when the music died away, we all sat still for fear o' dis-
turbin' him.

Horace had been settin' holdin' one of his hands, and
after a bit he leaned forward and whispered, " Was that
what you wanted, Promotheus ? "

But the' was n't any reply. The little gust o' wind had
come with the song — and fully ripe, and soft to the core
of his big, warm heart, Promotheus had loosed his hold on
the bough of life, and dropped off onto the soft, deep grass
of eternity.

" Promotheus ! Promotheus ! " cried Horace, and then
covered his face with his hands and dropped forward upon
The's quiet breast.

" Badger-face," called a harsh voice, and we looked at
Ty Jones and saw him leanin' towards The. " Wait, Bad-
ger-face, wait — I want to speak to ya. I want to tell you
that I lied to ya. Oh Lord, it 's too late, it 's too late ! "
And Ty Jones pressed his hand across his eyes and sank
back.

THE LITTLE GUST O' WIND 439

Horace whirled to tell Ty what he thought of him;

but the Friar placed his big hand on Horace's shoulder,

and pointed down to The's placid face. Horace gave

a shuddcrin' sob, and settled back into his former

position.

Janet Morris crossed the floor to the Friar just then and
said tc him in a low tone : " I have found it again — my
voice has come back to me."

Ty Jones took his hand down from his eyes and straight-
ened up and looked at her. All the eagle had gone from
his face, and it looked old and haggarH. " r jn't you really
know who I am? *' he asked.

She looked at him and shook her head.
"I'm your half-brother," he said. "I'm Tyrell Jones
Morris. Your mother might have been a good woman,
but she was not good to me — she was n't fair ; she preju-
diced my father again' me. You were scUin' tickets at an
elevated station in New York when I found you. You
looked a good deal like your mother, for you were weak and
sickly. I didn't know then, whether I brought you back
with me because we had the same blood in our veins, or
because I hated you — and I don't know yet. I *m not tellin'
you this now, because I care any thing for you, or the
preacher; but Badger-face was square, and I know now
'at he 'd never have turned again' me if the rest of ya had n't
tampered with him. I 'm sorry I did n't tell him before he
died — and that 's why I 'm tellin' you now."

I winked my eyes to the boys, and we filed out and went
over to the bunk-shack. We li|?hted our pipes and sat a
long time smokin' in silence. One by one they dropped off
to bed until only me and ol' Tank Williams was left. Tank
sat with a sour look on his face, and so (feeply buried in

440 FRIAR TUCK

thought that the burnt matches around his stool looked like
a wood pile. " What are ya thinkin' of, Tank?" 1 said to
him.

" I *m not kickiii', understand," sez he ; " but it does seem
to me that when all The asked for was a cradle-song, the
Friar could 'a* thought jp somethin' besides another one 0'
those doggone sheep-herder hymns. The didn't have any
more use for sheep-herders 'n I have."

This was the real Tank, all right. Once an idee took
possession of him, it rode him rough shod till he keeled over
with his tongue hangin' out.

CHAPTER FORTY-SIX

THE FINAL MOVES

We buried The by the side o' Tim Simpson. Horace insisted
on makin' a coffin for him — fact was, he wanted to have a
regular funeral, but we talked him out o' this ; so he made
a coffin himself and lined it with silk which Ty Jones had
brought out for Janet to make dresses of. The Friar h^ld
some short services, but he did n't sing or prerich any. Some
way, the' didn't seem to be any need of it. After we
had covered him over we stood around talkin' for quite
a while ; and then only turned away because the first rain
we had had for months came rattlin' down from the
mountains.

"Do you see that, now?" asked ol' Tank after we had
reached the porch and were sittin' watchin' it come down
in torrents.
" I 'm not totally blind," sez I.

" Well, I 'm not superstitious," sez Tank ; " but I 'm
bettin' that he's had that tended to, himself. He wasn't
one to forget his friends, and he knew 'at what we heeded
most was rain — so he's called attention to it the first
chance he 's had."

Fact was. Tank was so everlastin' superstitious that he
spelt Tomas with an " h " in it to keep from havin' thirteen
letters in his full name; but it did seem queer about this
rain, because they wasn't any sane man in the world who
would have expected a rain just at this time. It *s astonishin'

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442

FRIAR TUCK

how many curious things there is if a feller just takes not

of 'em.

The Friar and Ty had had a long talk the night 'at F
motheus slipped away, and the Friar had agreed to se
down at the ranch and do what he could for Ty. Ty was
thankful ; but he had n't much choice, so he behaved bette
any one would have expected. The Friar wanted me
stay and be foreman for him ; but I told him I had promi
Jabez to come back as soon as I had got a good holt
myself again; and I intended to leave for the Diam
Dot the minute things were right at the Cross brand.
Friar did n't much trust Pepper Kendal for foreman ;
the minute I thought it over, I saw that Olaf was the \
man, and this suited the Friar to a T.

We brought the prisoners up to Ty and he told 'em 1
things were and advised 'em to adjust themselves to 1
conditions as fast as possible, and they all agreed to d
and went to work under Olaf. The Friar knew a preac
at Laramie ; so Horace gave Tillte Dutch the job o' g
after him, and as soon as he came, the Friar and Janet \
married, and then I made plans to hit the trail for the 1

mond Dot.

Horace had made up his mind to build himself a c
up at our old camp and he ' led to hire me for life ; b
had taken root at the Diamond, and when I explained th
to him, he owned up I was right. I suggested to Ho
that ol' Tank Williams was the very man for him, and he
mitted, when he came to look it over, that Tank would
him a heap better for hired help 'n I would. He even 1
so far as to say he never could understand how it cam
a stiff-necked man like ol' Jabez could put up with my i
pendent ways. I told Horace the' was a lot of tliinj

;^tiW^*

THE FINAL MOV"ES 443

was n't necessary for him to understand, and then I whistled
to Tank, and he came over and joined us.

Tank rolled the notion about in his head a while, and then
he sez : " Horace, I '11 take ya up. We both got cured up
of our nerves on the same trip, and ever since then I have to
own that you 've found favor in my sight ; but the one thing
'at counts bigger 'n anything else, is the fact that, come
what will, you '11 never have any more hankerin' to be pes-
tered by a lot o' sheep, than I will."

Olaf started to get things ready for the round-up and us
Diamond Dot boys, aside from ol' Tank, rode off home, where
we found things in consid'able of a muddle. Durin' the
three years previous I had been takin' more and more o' the
responsibility onto my own shoulders, and ol' Cast Steel found
himself purty rusty. We turned to and straightened things
out, and then I settled down to the sober business o' handlin'
a big outfit with a view on the future.

After this, I did n't do any more skitin' around than my
peculiar nature seemed to insist on; but I did make out
to pay the Cross brand a visit every once in a while. The
Friar only intended to stay long enough to get things to
slidin' easy; and then he and Janet were to go back East
and work among the city poor ; but the chance never came.

Janet grew perfectly strong and well again ; but the city
alius made her nervous to return to the mountains, and they
were kept so busy on the ranch that the years slipped away
without bein' noticed.

Ty's backbone was all in one piece, and solid — except
whtTt Olaf had unjointed it — and it took years to wear
him down to friendliness; but when the Friar's first baby
got big enough to creep, the contrary little cuss took more
interest in ol' Ty Jones, than in airy other thing the' was

444

FRIAR TUCK

on the place. I never saw any one yet who did n't feel fla
tered at a baby's endorsement — though why a baby shou
be supposed to actually have better judgment than gro\i
folks has never been fully explained to me yet.

Horace kept his word to The, and he did all he could f
Ty. Ty didn't like him and he didn't like Ty; but 1
was human, and it made him lonely to sit in one spot ;
the time, so that while he refused to be thankful, he grad
ally got to relyin' on Horace ; and Horace was also huma
and the more he did ior Ty on The's account, the more foi
he grew of Ty on his own account. He got him a whe(
chair first, and this was a big help. Then he fixed up
trapeze for Ty to practice on. Ty got mad about this ai
said that cripple though he was, no man could make
monkey of him ; but one night when he could n't sleep 1
practiced on it, and it gave him a lot o' relief.

The name of the Chinaman was Yuen Yick, and 1
thought 'at Ty Jones was some sort of a god, and fair wo
shipped him — every one o' Ty's men swore by him, cv(
after he turned decent. Ty used to abuse the Chink all 1
could and it pleased 'em both; and the Chink saw tli
Horace meant well by Ty, so he kept Horace posted on ju
what Ty did and thought ; and Horace had Janet make son
flannel bricks filled with cotton for Ty to throw at tl
Chinaman. Ty got a lot o' satisfaction out o' these brict
and the exercise helped him too.

Next, Horace had a wide porch built all around T\
house, and he swung ropes with rings on 'em from the ce;
ing, an equal distance apart ; and Ty got so he could swii
from ring to ring, and go all around the house, and clin
ladders, and as the boy got big enough to become tyrannic;
which was soon enough, goodness knows, he made Ty do i

THE FINAL MOVES

445

manner o' stunts — throw balls and juggle 'em, tell stories,
draw pictures — Well, the fact was, that between 'em all,
they kept Ty so active that first we knew, the devil had all
been worked out of him and he was as civilized as any of
us. One day when Horace was down visitin' him, he sent
in the Chink and had him bring out a set of ivory figures,
carved most beautiful and called chess-men ; and he dared
Horace to play him a game, and this was the final surrender
of the old Ty Jones.

He was a well edicated man, Ty was; and each winter
when he had left the ranch, he had gone to some big city
where he had pertended to be a regular swell. No one
ever found out just what had soured him so on the world,
for his nature was to be sociable to a degree. He said that
no one knew the cause of it except ol' Promotheus, and it
was mightily to his credit that he hadn't devulged the
secret.

Ty strung out his surprises quite a while. It seems he was
also an inventor, and had patents which brought him in a
lot o' money. He had found this cave and had just widened
it where widenin' was necessary, and had built hif cabin
above it. The floor was double and filled with earth, and
the fake drawers were also filled with earth, so 'at no sound
would show that it was hollow underneath. The drawers
swi^rg en a steel piller which could be worked from above
by a rope which hung back o' his bookcase and from below
by a lever.

It was a curious thing to see Ty Jones with his
bristly eyebrows and his eagle's beak of a nose, makin'
mechanical toys for the Friar's and Olaf's children.
They didn't put any limit on what he was able to do, and
he used to grumble at 'em as fierce as a grizzly — and then

V.ii

446 FRIAR TUCK

back-track like an Injun, and do whatever they want
him to.

The Friar never quite gave up his plot to go back ai
work among the poor; but the' was alius so many thin
imposed upon him by the home folks that he was pester
with letters every time he left; and usually compromis
by gatherin' up a bunch o' the poor as hasty as possible, ai
bringin' 'em back with him. His head was full of what
called welfare plans, and he settled the poor along all t
likely cricks he found vacant, and bulldozed 'em into goi
to work. It 's a curious coincident ; but most of em turn
out well.

The' was a bilious feller out visitin' me once, which call
himself a sosologist. I told him about some o' the Friai
projects ; and he said that the Friar was nothin' but a rai
Utopian, and that this sort o' work would never remove ,
the evils of the world.

" You can call him anything ya want to," sez I, " so loi
as it 's a word I don't understand ; but the Friar 's not tryi
to remove all the evils in the world. He only removes the
evils he can find by spendin' his whole life in huntin' f
'em ; but he certainly does remove these ones in quick ai
able shape."

Another time, right after the Friar had brought about
settlement between some sheep and cattle men, a preacli
dropped oS to give his appetite a little exercise at the Di
mond Dot. He belonged to the same herd that the Fri
had cut out from, and I thought he would be interested ;
I told him consid'able about the Friar. He was a most ju(
cious-lookin' man, but baggy under the eyes and chi. I
got all fussed up when I spoke well o' the Friar, and sa
he was un-co-nonical, said he was unorthodox — Oh,

THE FINAL MOVES 447

cut loose and swore at the Friar in his own tongue 'til I
about lost my temper.

" Look here," I sez to him, " it would take me some months
to tell you all the good deeds the Friar has actually done ;
but I '11 just give you one single example. If I was to live
up to my natural disposition, I 'd wring your neck, or shoot
off your ears, or somethin' like that ; but owin' to the Friar
havin' taught me self-control, I 'm not even goin' to snap
my fingers again' your blue nose. Make yourself perfectly at
home here, and stay as long as the East can spare ya ; but
you '11 have to excuse me for a while, as the Friar has just
written me an order to go over into the Basin to see what
can be done for a young feller who has been arrested for
hoss-stealin'."

Horace contributes liberally to the Friar's projects; but
he don't take a hand in the game, himself — except with
the imported poor which are gathered at the Cross brand,
waitin' to be transplanted. Every year he seems to shrink
about an eighth of an inch smaller, and get about that much
tougher. He lights out for a trip now and again, and ol'
Tank alius tags along, grumblin'. Tank thinks full as much
of Horace as The did ; but Tank 's a different proposition.
The easier his lot is the more he grumbles ; but I like nothin'
better than to have a chat witu him over old times.

One night I was up visitin' Horace, and after supper we
got a little restless and star^ u out for a walk. We sauntered
down to our old look-out and stood gazin' down at the
lights of the Cross brand ranch. Ty had rigged up a water
power to manufacture e-lectricity, simply because the chil-
dren had needed it to run some o' their idees, but the' was
plenty of it to light the whole place. In token of Ty's brand,
and also as a symbol of his own callin', the Friar had built

448 FRIAR TUCK

an immense cross on the cliflf just above the mouth of I
ravine, and on the upright, and at each end o' the cross-pii
were big electric lights. These could be seen for miles, a
every one knew 'at whatever troubles they had, there v
alius welcome, cheery hospitality, and sound advice wail
for 'em in the shadow of this cross.

It was a moonlight night, one of those crisp, brifrht nigl
when it makes a feller feel solemn just to get up high i
look down at the beauty of the old, hard Earth. We I
been talkin' o' the old days as usual ; but not talkin' mu
for we each saw the same set of pictures when we lool
down from here, and they did n't need many words.

" Life is like a game o' chess," sez Horace. " The opet
is not so absolutely vital ; but after a time the' comes >
little move which is the keynote of all the balance of the gt
— and the same is true o' life. The way things has tur
out down yonder seems to be the very best way they co
have turned out ; but it 's hard to look back and tell i
what was the keynote of it all. Of course Promotheus
Promotheus was the prime mover; but then all the a
along you can see the Friar's influence. What would
say was the keynote o' this tangled game, Happy? "

I looked down at Horace : he was wearin' a battered
hat, rough clothes and leggins, and smokin' a corncob p
" That 's an easy one," sez I, tryin' to shake off a feelin
sadness which was beginnin' to creep over me, in spite
all I could do ; " gettin' your nerves cured up, Horace,
the keynote of it all."
" That was a long time ago," sez Horace, " a long, 1

time ago."

1th of the
:ross-piecc
miles, and
there was
ice waitin"

rht nights,

I high and

We had
kin' much,
we looked
ds.

'he openin'
comes one
-f the game
has turned
they could
id tell jubt
notheus —

II the way

would YOU

attered old
rncob pipe.
a feclin' o'
in spite of
[orace, was

long, long