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"'C o 1^29 n \C ■ ) // 643208. 3, IO.S6, '^ .mf CONTENTS. Handsome is as Handsome Does. By CH — S R — DE. 5 Lothaw 21 ,Muck-a-Muck. After Cooper 37 Terence Den ville. By CH— L L— V— R 48 ISelina Sedilia. By Miss M. E. B— DD— N and Mrs. H— N— Y W— D 57 |The Ninety-Nine Guardsmen. By AL— X— D— R D— M— S 70 [The Dweller of the Threshold. By Sir ED— D L— TT— N B— LW— R 81 iThe Haunted Man By CH— R— S D— CK— NS .... 89 I Miss Mix. By CH— L— TTE RR— NTE 102 [Guy Heavystone. By the author of " Sword & Gun." 118 Mr. Midshipman Breezy. By Capt. M— RRY— T, R.N. 129 I John Jenkins. By T. S. A— TH— R 143 INo Title. By W— LK— E C— LL— NS 151 IN. N., being a Novel in the Frencii Paragraphic Style. 164 Fantine, after the French of Victor Hugo 171 " La Femnie," after the French of M. Michelet 179 JMary McGillup, with an Introduction. By G. A. S— LA 186 1^ I I HANDSOME IS AS HANDSOME DOES. By CH S R DE. CHAPTER I. The Dodds were dead. Eor twenty year they had slept under the green graves of Kittery church- yard. The townfolk still spoke of them kindly. The keeper of the alehouse, where David had I smoked his pipe, regretted him regularly, and Mis- tress Kitty, Mrs. Dodd's maid, whose trim figure ' always looked well in her mistress's gowns, was inconsolable. The Hardins were in America. Raby was aristocratically gouty; Mrs. Raby religious. Briefly, then, we have disposed of — 1. Mr. and Mrs. Dodd (dead). 2. Mr. and Mrs. Hardin (translated), 3. Raby, haron et femme. (Yet I don't know Uibout the former ; he came of a long-lived family, [and the gout is an uncertain disease.') G IIANDBOME 14 AS HANDSOME DOES. Wc have active at the piescnt writing (place aux H ge dames) — H ^j 1. Lady Carol iiio Coventry, niece of Sir Fred-IBtl erick. ^ i„ 2. Faraday Huxley Little, son of Henry and Grace Little, deceased. Sequitur to the above, A Hero and Heroine. :| ^ CHAPTEK IL On the death of his parents, Faraday little was taken to Eaby Hall. In accepting his guardian- ship, Mr. Raby struggled stoutly against two prejudices : Faraday was plain-looking and scep- tical. "Handsome is as handsome does, sweetheart," pleaded Jael, interceding for the orphan with arms that were still beautiful. "Dear knows, it is not his fault if he does not look like —his father," she added with a great gulp. Jael was a woman, and vindicated her womanhood by never entirely forgiv- ing a former rival. " It's not that alone, madam," screamed Kaby, " but, d — m it, the little rascal's a scientist, — an atheist, a radical scoffer ! Disbelieves in the Bible, ma'm ; is full of this Darwinian stuff about natural ■■^wwwff iL H Wii i mi HANDSOMK IS AS HANDHOMK UOKM. I sehictioii and descent. Descent, foraootli I In my day, madam, gentlemen weie content to trace their ancestors back to gentlemen, and not to — monkeys !" ** Dear heart, the boy is clever," urged Jael. "Clever!" roared Kaby ; " what does a gentleman 1 want with cleverness ?" CHAPTER II r. Young Little icas clever. At seven he liad con- structed a telescope ; at nine a flying machine. At ten he saved a vahiable life. Norwood Park was the adjacent estate, — a lordly domain dotted with red deer and black trunks, but scrupidously kept with gravelled roads as hard and blue as steel. There Little was strolling one sum- mer morning, meditating on a new top with con- cealed springs. At a little distance before him he saw the flutter of lade and ribbons. A young lady, I a very young lady, — say of seven summers, — tricked [out in the crying abominations of the present fa- ishion, stood beside a low bush. Her nursery-maid [was not present, possibly owing to the fact that I John the footman was also absent. Suddenly Little came towards her. "Excuse 8 IIANDHOMK IS AM llANDMOMi; IK>KS. 1110, but do you know wluit llioso lujiTies an!?" He* was pointing to the low l)U«li lillcd witli dark clus- tei'fi of yliining — .susjiiciously aliining — fruit. " Certainly ; they are bluebeniea." "Pardon me; you are mistaken. They belong to quite another family." Miss Impudenee drew herself up to her full height (exactly three feet nine and a half inches), and, curling an eighth of an inch of scarlet lip, said, scornfully, " Your liimily, perhaps." Faraday Little smiled in the superiority of boy- hood over girlhood. " I allude to the classitication. That plant is the belladonna, or deadly nightshade. Its alkaloid is a "»arcotic poison." Sauciness turned pale. " 1 — have — ^just — eaten — some !" And began to whimper. " dear, what shall I do V Then did it, i. e., wrung her small fingers and cried. " Pardon me one moment." Little passed his | arm around her neck, and with his thumb opened I widely the patrician-vined lids of her sweet blue eyes. " Thank heaven there is yet no dilation of the pupil ; it is not too late !" He cast a rapid glance around. The nozzle and about three feet of garden hose lay near him. " Open your mouth, quick 1" 11 v ?5?^'***»*»*"**»'*S»WW"ff^^!??^?iWiPiow, don't move." He wrapped liis liandkerchief ai'ouiid a lioop- stick. Then he inserted both in the other end of the stiifhose. It titted snugly. He slioved in and then drew it back. Nature abhors a vacuum. The young patrician was as timenable to this law as the cliild of the lowest peasant. '^ She succumbed. It was all over in a minute. Then she burst into a small fury. ** You nasty, bad — uc/hj boy." Young Little winced, but smiled. " Stimulants," he whispered to the frightened nursery-maid who approached; "good evening." He was gone. . • The breach between young Little and Mr. Raby was slowly widening, Little found objectionable features in the hall. " This black oak ceiling and wainscoating is not as healthful as plaster; be- sides, it absorbs the light. The bedroom ceiling is too low ; the Elizabethan architects knew noth- ing of ventilation. The color of that oak panel- 10 HANDSOME IS AS HANDSOME] DOES. i' yi ing which you admire is duo to an excess of car- bon and the exuvia from the pores of your skin—" " Leave the house," bellowed Eaby, " before the roof falls on your sacrilegious head I" As Little left the house, Lady Caroline and a handsome boy of about Little's age entered. Lady Caroline recoiled, and then — blushed. Little glared ; he instinctively felt the presence of a rival. CHAPTER V. Little worked hard. He studied night and day. In five years he became a lecturer, then a professor. ^ He soared as high as the clouds, he dipped as low as the cellars of the London poor. He ana- lyzed the London fog, and found it two parts smoke, one disease, one unmentionable abomina- tions. He published a pamphlet, which was violently attacked. Then he knew he had done something. But he had not forgotten Caroline. He was walking one day in the Zoological Gardens and he came upon a pretty picture, — flesh and blood too. ! f HANDSOME IS AS HANDSOME DOES. "before the resence of a Lady Caroline feeding buns to the bears ! An exquisite thrill passed through his veins. She turned her sweet face and their eyes met. They recollected their first meeting seven years before, but it was his turn to be sliy and timid. "Wonder- ful power of age and sex ! She met him with per- fect self-possession. "Well meant, but indigestible I fear" (he alluded to the buns). " A clever person like yourself can easily correct that " (she, the slyboots, was thinking of something else). In a few moments they were chatting gayly. Little eagerly descanted upon the diiferent animals ; she listened with delicious interest. An hour glided delightfiUly away. After this sunshine, clouds. To them suddenly entered Mr. liaby and a handsome young man. The gentleman bowed stiffly and looked vicious, — as they felt. The lady of this quartette smiled amiably, as she did not feel. " Looking at your ancestors, I suppose," said Mr. Eaby, pointing to the monkeys ; "we Avill not dis- tuib you. Come." And he led Caroline away. Little was heart-sick. He dared not follow them. % 12 HANDSOME IS AS HANDSOME DOES. But an hour later lie saw sonietliing which filled hi.s heart with bliss unspeakable. Lady Caroline, with a divine smile on her face, feeding the monkeys ! I I f Encouraged by love, Little worked hard upon his new flying-machine. His labors were lightered by talking of the beloved one with her French maid The'rese, whom he had indiscreetly bribed. Mademoiselle The'rese was venal like all the class, but ill this instance I fear she was not bribed by British gold. Strange as it may seem to the British mind, it was British genius, British eloquence, British thought that brought her to the feet of this young savan. "I believCj'' said Lady Caroline, one day, inter- rupting her niafd in a gl jwing eulogium upon the skill of 'M. LeeteD," — "I believe you are in love with this Professor." A quick flush crossed the olive cheek of Therese, wliich Lady Caroline after- ward remembered. The eventf id day of trial came. The public were gathered, impatient and scornful as the pigheaded public are apt to be. In the open area a long cylindrical balloon, in shape like a Bologna saus- )OES. hich filled hi.s on her face, HANDSOME IS AS HANDSOME DOES. 13 ed hard upon i^ere lightered I her French I'cetly bribed, all the class, lot bribed by to the British ■sh eloquence, he feet of this ne day, inter- um upon the u are in love h crossed the Caroline after- le public were he pigheaded I area a long- Bologna saus- age, swayed above tlie machine, from which, like 8oine enormous bird caught in a net, it tried to free itself. A heavy rope held it fast to the ground. Little was waiting for the '"ballast, when his eye caught Lady Caroline's among the spectators. The glance was appealing. In a moment he was at her side. "I should like so much to get into the machine," said tlie arch-hypocrite, demurely. " Are you engaged to marry young Eaby," said Little, bluntly. " As you please," she said with a courtesy ; "do I take this as a refusal 1" Little was a gentleman. He lifted lier and her lapdog into the car. "HoAvnice! it won't go off]" " Xo, the rope is strong, and the ballast is not yet in." A report like a pistol, a cry from the spectators, a thousand hands stretched to grasp the parted rope, and the balloon darted upward. Only one hand of that thousand caught the rope, — Little's ! But in the same instant the horror- stricken spectators saw him whirled from his feet and borne upward, still clinging to the rope, into space. u HANDSOME IS AS HANDSOME DOES. CHAPTER VII/'^ Lady Caroline fainted. The cold watery nose of her dog on her cheek "brought her to herself. She dared not look over the edge of the car ; she dared not look up to the bellying monster above her, bearing her to death. She thrcAV herself on the bottom of the car, and embraced the only living thing spared her, — the poodle. Then she cried. Then a clear voice came apparently out of the cir- cumambient air: — " May I trouble you to look at the barometer V She put her head over the car. Little was hang- ing at the end of a long rope. She put her head back again. . In another moment he saw her perplexed, blush- ing face over the edge, — blissful sight. "0, please dor't think of coming up! Stay there, do !" Little stayed. Of course she could make noth- ing out of the barometer, and said so. Little snuled. ^ * The right of dramatization of this and succeeding chapters is reserved by the writer. '4^ )OES. HANDSOME IS AS HANDSOME DOES. 15 h* ;'.! watery noso to hersolf. he car; she lister above V herself on e only living ti she cried. > of the cir- "Will you kindly send it down to me?" But she had no string or cord. Finally, she said, " "Wait a moment." Little waited. This time her face did not appear. The barometer came slowly down at the end of — a stay-lace. The barometer showed a frightful elevation. Little looked up at the valve and said nothing. Presently he heard a sigh. Then a sob. Then, rather sharply, — " Why don't you do something 1" barometer 1" )le was hanir- ut her head lexed, blush- : np! Stay make noth- so. Little 1 .« succeeding CHAPTEE VIIL Little came up the rope hand over hand. Lady Caroline crouched in the farther side of the car, Fido, the poodle, whined. " Poor thing," said Lady Caroline, it's hungry." " Do you wish to save the dog V said Little. *'Yes." " Give me your parasol." She handed Little a good-sized affair of lace and silk and whalebone. (None of your " sunshades.") Little examined its ribs carefully. " Give me the dog." 16 HANDSOME IS AS HANDSOME DOES. Latly Caroline liurricdly slipjocd a note under the dog's collar, and i)assed over licr pet. Little tied the dog to the handle of the parasol and launched them hoth into space. The next moment they were slowly, but tranquilly, sailing to the earth. " A parasol and a parachute arc distinct, hut not different. Be not alarmed, he will get his dinner at some farm-house," » , " Where are we now 1" " That opaque spot you see is Londoji fog. Those twin clouds are North and South America. Jerusalem and Madagascar are those specks to the | right. Lady Caroline moved nearer j she was becoming i interested. Then she recalled herself and said i freezingly, " How are we going to descend 1" " By opening the valve." ** Why don't you open it then V " Because the valve-string is broken !" mmm HANDSOME IS AS HANDSOME DOES. 17 note under tlio CHAPTER IX. Lady Caroline fainted. Wlien she revived it was dark. Th(;y were apparently cleaving their way througli a solid block of black marble. She moaned ond sliuddered. " I wish wo had a light." " I have no lucifers," said Little. " I observe, however, that you wear a necklace of amber. Amber under certain conditions becomes highly electr.cal. Permit me." He took the amber necklace and rubbed it brisk- ly. Then he asked lier to present her knuckle to the gem. A briglit spark was the result. This was repeated for some hours. The light was not bril- liant, but it was enough for the purposes of pro- priety, and satisfied the delicately minded girl. Suddenly, there was a tearing, hiss.ing noise and a smell of gas. Little looked up and turned pale. The balloon, at what I shall call the pointed end of the Bologna sausage, was evidently bursting from increased pressure. The gas was escaping, and already they were beginning to descend. Little was resigned but firm. " If the silk gives way, then we are lust. Un- 18 JIANDSOMi: 18 A« IIAND80ME DOE.S. ii:;i I'ortuiifitcly 1 have no rope nor material for binding it." Tluj woman's instinct had arrived at the samo conchision sooner than tlic man's reason. But she was liesitating over a detail. Will you go down tlie roi)e for a moment f she said, with a sweet smile. Little went down. Presently she called to him. She held something in her hand, — a wonderful invention of the seventeenth century, improved and perfected in this : a pyranud of sixteen circular hoops of light yet strong steel, attached to each other by cloth bands. AVitli a cry of joy Little seized them, climbed to the balloon, and fitted the elastic hoops over its conical end. Then he returned to the car. " We are saved." Lady Caroline, blushing, gathered her slim but antique drapery against the other end of the car. CHAPTEE X. TuEY were slowly descending. Presently Lady Caroline distinguished the outlines of Ivaby Hall. " I think I will get out here," she said. Little anchored the balloon and prepared to fol- low her. HANDSOMK I^S AS HANl)«OMK DOES. 19 " Xot HO, my friend," slio wuid, witli an arch Kiiiilo. ** AVo must not be seen together. Peophi might tar , Farewell." Little sprang again into tlie balloon and sped away to America. He came down in California, oddly enough in front of Hardin's door, at Dutch Flat. Hardin was just examining a specimen of ore. *' You are a scientist ; can you tell me if that is worth anything T he said, handing it to Little. Little held it to the light. " It contains ninety per cent of silver." Hardin embraced him. " Can I do anything for you, and why are you here ]" Little told his story. Hardin asked to see the rope. Then he examined it carefully. "Ah, this was cut, not broken!" " With a knife 1" askod Little. " !N^o. Observe both sides are equally indented. It was done with a i^cissors /" " Just Heaven 1" gasped Little. " Therese !" CHAPTEPtXI. Little returned to London. Passing through London one day he met a dog-fancier. "Buy a nice poodle, sir T !i) 20 MAMJSOMF IS AS IIANDSOMR DORS. Soniclliiiij.' in the nniuial iittrm'toil his aitt'iitioii. " Kido!" lie gasjKMl. The do^' yt'lju'd. Little l)(>u;,flit him. ( )ii taking oil" his collar a l>iec(! of jtaper rustleil to the floor. lie knew tlu^ handwriting ami kissed it. It ran : — To THE Hon. Augustus Rady : — I cannot marry you. If I marry any one " (sly puss) " it will be the man who has twice saved my life, — Professor Little. " Caroline Coventry." And she did. im |i^ LOTH A.A\^ ; OR, THE ADVENTURES OF A YOUNG GENTLE- MAN IN SEARCH OF A RELIGION. «•»-•- CHAPTER I. " I REMEMBER liiiu a little boy," said the Duchess. " His mother was a dear friend of mine ; you know she was one of my bridesmaids." " And you have never seen him since, mamma?" asked the oldest niarried daughter, who did not look a day older than her mother. " Never ; he was an orphan shortly after. I have often reproached myself, but it is so difficult to see boys." This simple yet first-class conversation existed in the morning-room of Plusham, where the mistress of the palatial mansion sat involved in the sacred 99 I.OTIIAW privacy of lu'riiuurit'd dauglitt'is. One (li'xlrvoiisly aj)j»litMl goMcii kiiitting-iu'«'(lK's to \hv i'abricntion of a jiursi' of Hos.s silk oi the nuvst texture, which lutiic wlio knew the almost fabulous wealth of the Duke wouKl believe was ever destiiu'tl to hold in its silken meshes a less sum than .£1,000,000; another adorned a slipper exclusively with seed pearls ; a third emblazoned a page with rare j)ig- ments ami the finest (piality of gold leaf. Beautiful forms leaned over frames glowing with embroidery, and beautiful frames leaned over forms inlaid with mother-of-pearl. Others, more remote, occasionally burst into melody as they tried the i)assages of a new and exclusive air given to them in MS. by- some titled and devoted friend, for the private use of the aristocracy alone, and al)Solutely prohibited for publication. The Duchess, herself the superlative of beauty, wealth, and position, was married to the highest noble in the Three Kingdoms. Those who talked about such matters said that their 2)rogeny were exactly like their parents, — a peculiarity of the aristocratic and wealthy. They all looked like brothers and sisters, except their parents, who, such was their purity of blood, the perfection of their manners, and the opulence of their condition, might liave been taken for their own children's elder son IMTIIAW 23 iiiul (laii;^'liU'r. Tliu ihiii}ly ivli- gious convictions were impressed. He instantly went up to this gifted being, confessed, and received absohition. '* To-morrow, lie said to himself, " I will partake of the communion, and endow the Church with my vast estates. For the present I'll let the improved cottages go." CHAPTER ly. As Lothaw turned to leave the Cardinal, he was struck by a beautiful face. It was that of a matron, slim but shapely as an Ionic column. Her face was Grecian, with Corinthian temples ; Hellenic eyes that looked from jutting eyebrows, like dormer- windows in an Attic forehead, completed her perfect Athenian outline. She wore a l)lack frock-coat tightly buttoned over her bloomer trousers, and a standing collar. " Your Lordship is struck by that ftice," said a social parasite. " I am ; who is she ?" " Her name is Mary Ann. She is marri(?d to an American, and has lately invented a new religion." " Ah !" said Lothaw eacjerlv, witli difhcultv r<'- straining himself from rushing toward her. 28 r.UTIIAW. •• Yes ; sliall I iiitruduct? you?" b.tluiw tliought of Lady Coriander's lligli Church inoclivities, of the Cardinal, and hesitated : '* Xu, I thank you, not now." CHAPTER V. LoTHAW was maturing. He had attended two woman's rights conventions, three Fenian meetings, liad diney at White's, and had danced vis-a-vis to a prince of the royal blood, and eaten off of gold plates at Crecy House. His stables were near Oxford, and occupied more ground than the University. He was driving over there one day, when he perceived some rustics and menials endeavoring to stop a pair of runaAvay horses attached to a carnage in which a lady and gontleman were seated. Calmly awaiting the ter- mination of the accident, with highbred courtesy Lothaw forbore to interfere, the carriage was over- turned, the occupants thrown out, and the runaways secured by the servants, when he advanced and offered the lady the exclusive use of his Oxford stables. Turning upon him a face whose perfect Hellenic P I-OTIIAW. n (lotails lie rL'iiieiiibuit.'(l, she slowly dragged agentle- man from under the wheels into the light and pre- sented him with ladylike dignity as her husband, Major-Gencral ('ami)eidown, an American. " Ah," said Lothaw carelessly, '* I believe I have some land there. If I nii>;take not, my agent, Mr. Putney Giles, lately purchased the State of — Illi- nois — I think you call it." " Exactly. As a former resident of the city of Chicago, let me introduce myself as your tenant." Lothaw liowed graciously to the gentleman who, except that he seemed better dressed than most J^nglishmen, showed no otlier signs of inferiority and plebeian extraction. " We have met before," said Lotha-w to the lady as she leaned on his arm, while they visited his stables, the University, and other places of interest in Oxford. " Pray tell me, what is this new reli- gion of yours V "It is Woman Suffrage, Free Love, Mutual Affi- nity, and Communism. Embrace it and me." Lothaw did not know exactly what to do. She however soothed and sustained his agitated frame and sealed with an embrace his agitated foini. llie (ieneral approached and coughed slightly with gen- tlemanlv tact. I. '* My husband will be too happy to talk with 90 LOTHAW. ; ': VLvu further vn this sul)ject," she said with quiet •.iignity. as she regained the General's side. " Come wir^h us to Oneida. Brook Fami is a thing of the CHAPTER VI. A^ Lothaw drove toward liis country seat, " The Mural Enclosure," he observed a crowd, apparently of tiie working class, gathered around a singular- looking man in the picturesque garb of an Ethio- pian serenader. " What does he say V inquired Lothaw of his driver. The man touched his hat respectfully and said, '• Mv Marv Ann." " ' Mv Marv Ann 1' " Lothaw's heart beat rapid- ly. "WTio was this mysterious foreigner? He had heard from Lady Coriander of a certain Popish plot : but could he connect Mr. Camperdown with it? The spectacle of two hundred men at arms who advanced to meet him at the gates of The Mural Enclosure drove all else from the still youthful and impressible mind of Lothaw. Immediately behind them, on the steps of the baronial halls, Avere ranged LOTHAW. 31 Ilia retainers, led by tlie cliief cook and bottle- washer, and head crumb-remover. On either side were two companies of laundry-maids, preceded by the chief crimper and fluter, supporting a long Ancestral Line, on wliich depencled the family linen, and under whicli the youthful lord of the manor passed into the halls of his fatl^ers. Twenty- four scullions carried the massive gold and silver plate of the fainily on their shoulders, and deposited it at the feet of their master. The spoons Avere then solemnly counted by the steward, and the per- fect ceremony ended. Lothaw sighed. He sought out the gorgeously gilded " Taj," or sacred mausoleum erected to his grandfather in the second story front room, and wept over the man he did not know. He wan- dered alone in his magnificent park, and then, throwing himself on a grassy bank, pondered on the Great First Cause, and the necessity of religion. "I will send Mary Ann a handsome present," said Lothaw, thoughtfully. I.UTIIAW CHAPTKH VI r. B HNr "Each of these pearls, my Lord, is worth fifty thousand guinoiis," srid Mr. Amethyst, tlic fashion- al)le jeweller, as lie lightly lifted a large shovelful from a convenient hin behind his counter. " Indeed," said Lothaw carelessly, " I should pre- fer to see some expensive ones." " Some number sixes, I suppose," said Mr. Ame- thyst, taking a cmiple from the apex of a small pyramid that lay piled oii the shelf. " These are about the size of the Duchess of I^illingsgate's, but they are in finer condition. The fact is, her Grace permits her two children, tlie Martjuis of Smithfield and the Duke of St. Giles, — two sweet pretty boys, my Lord, — to use them as marbles in their games. Pearls recpiire some attention, and I go down there regularly twice a week to clean them. Perhaps you Lordship would like some ropes of pearls'?" "About half a cable's length," said Lothaw, shortly, " and send them to my lodgings." Mr. Amethyst became thoughtful. " I am afraid I have not the exact number — that is — excuse me one moment. I will run over to the Tower and borrow a few from the crown jewels." And before If R": .1 T.OTHAW. 33 Lotluiw could prevent liiiii, ho seized his hat aiul left LoMiaw aloni\ His position certainly was embarrassing. He (•ould not move without stepping on costly gems which had rolled from the counter ; the rarest diamonds lay scattered on the shelves; untold for- tunes in priceless emeralds lay within his grasp. iVltliough such was the aristocratic purity of his blood and the strength of his religious convictions that he probably would not liave pocketed a single diamond, still he could not help thinking tliat he might be accused of taking some. " You can search me if you like," he said when Mr. Amethyst re- turned ; but I assure you, upon the honor of a gen- tleman, that I have taken nothing." " Enough, my Lord," said Mr. Amethyst, with a low bow; we never search the aristocracy." CHAPTEE VIII. As Lothaw left Mr. Amethyst's, he ran against General Camperdown. " How is Mary Ann V he asked hurriedly. '' I regret to state that she is dying," said the General, with a grave voice, as he removed his cigar from his lips, and lifted his hat to Lothaw. L^. -T • Si > m |: 34 I,<)TnAW (< << Dvin;,':" said I "tliaw, iiicnMluluusly. Alas, tuo triu* :'' )<'].H old stone bottle?' "Ugh!" said the Indian,— " ugh ! good. The "White Eabbit is wise. Her wordc fall as the snow on Tootoonolo, and the rocky heart of Muck-a-Muck is hidden. What says my brother the Gray Gopher of Dutch Flat r " She has spoken, Muck-a-Muck," said the Judge, gazing fondly on his daughter. "It is well. Our treaty is concluded. No, thank you, — you need not dance the Dance of Snow Shoes, or the Mocca sin Dance, the Dance of Green Corn, or the Treaty Dance. I would be alone. A strange sadness overpowers me." "I go," said the Indian. " Tell your great chief in "Washington, the Sachem Andy, that the Red Man is retiring before the footsteps of the adven- turous Pioneer. Inform him, if you please, that westward the star of empire takes its way, that the chiefs of the Pi-Ute nation are for Reconstruction to a man, and that Klamath will poll a heavy Re- publican vote in the fall." And folding his blanket more tightly around him, Muck-a-Muck withdrew. 42 MUCK-A-MUCK. ' ■! %' CHAPTER III. Genevra Tompkins stood at the door of the log- cabin, lookmg after the retreating Overland Mail stage which conveyed her father to Virginia City. "He may never return again," sighed the young girl as she glanced at the frightfully rolling vehicle and wildly careering horsrs, — " at least, with un- broken bones. Should he meet with an accident ! I mind me now a fearful legend, familiar to my childhood. Can it be that the drivers on this line are privately instructed to despatch all passengers maimed by accident, to prevent tedious litigation 1 No, no. But why this weight upon my heart 1" She seated herself at the piano and lightly passed her hand over the keys. Then, in a clear mezzo- soprano voice, she sang the first verse of one of the most popular Irish ballads : — " Arrah ma dheelish, the distant dudheen. Lies soft in the moonlight, ma louchel vourneen : The springing gossoons on the heather are still, And the caubeens and colleens are heard on th« hills.'' But as the ravishing notes of her sweet voice died upon the air, her hands sank listlessly to her side. Music could not chase away the mysterious MUCK-A-MUCK. 43 shadow from her heart. Again she rose. Putting on a white crape bonnet, and carefully drawing ?i pair of lemon-colored gloves over her taper fingers, she seized her parasol and plunged into the depths of the fine pine forest. CHAPTER IV. Genevra had not proceeded many miles before a weariness seized upon her fragile limbs, and she would fain seat herself upon the trunk of a prostrate pine, which she previously dusted with her hand- kerchief. The sun was just sinking below tho horizon, and the scene was one of gorgeous and sylvan beauty. " How beautiful is Nature !" mur- mured the innocent girl, as, reclining gracefully against the root of the tree, she gathered up her skirts and tied a handkerchief around her throat. But a low growl interrupted her meditation. Start- ing to her feet, her eye met a sight which froze her blood with terror. The only outlet to the forest was the narrow path, barely wide enough for a single person, hemmed in by trees and rocks, which she had just traversed. Down this path, in Indian file, came a monstrous grizzly, closely followed by a California lion, a wild y 44 MUCK-A-MUCK. ^ly .i cat and a buffalo, the rear being brought up by a wild Spanish bull. The mouths of the three first animals were distended with frightful significance ; the horns of the last were lowered as ominously. As Genevra was preparing to faint, she heard a low voice behind her. "Eternally dog-gone my skin ef this ain't the puttiest chance yet." At the same moment, a long shining barrel drop- ped lightly from behind her, and rested over her shoulder. Genevra shuddered, " Dern ye — don't move." Genevra became motionless. The crack of the rifle rang through the woods. Three frightful yells were heard, and two sullen roars. Five animals bounded into the air and five lifeless bodies lay upon the plain. The well-aimed bullet had done its work. Entering the open throat of the grizzly, it had tra'^'ersed its body only to enter the tliroat of the California lion, and in like manner the catamount, until it passed through into the respective foreheads of the bull and the buffalo, and finally fell flattened from the rocky hillside. Genevra turned quickly. " My preserver !" she shrieked, and fell into the arms of Natty Bumpo, the celebrated Pike Kanger of Donner Lake. *•, MUCK-A-MUCK. 45 ^: I CHAPTER V. The moon rose cheerfully above Donner Lake. On its placid bosom a dug-out canoe glided rapidly, containing Natty Bumpo and Genevra Tompkins. Both were silent. The same thought possessed each, and perhaps there wa& sweet companionship even in the unbroken qinet. Genevra bit the han- dle of her parasol and blushed. Natty Bumpo took a fresh chew of tobacco. At length Genevra said, as if in half-spoken, reverie : — " The soft shining of the moon and the peaceful ripple of the waves seem to say to us various things of an instructive and moral tendency." " You may bet yer pile on that, Miss," said her companion, gravely. "It's all the preachin' and psalm-singin' I've heern since I was a boy." " Noble being !" said Miss Tompkins to herself, glancing at the stately Pike as he bent over his paddle to conceal his emotion. "Reared in this wild seclusion, yet he has become penetrated with visible consciousness of a Great First Cause." Then, collecting herself, she said aloud : " Methinks 'twere pleasant to glide ever thus down the stream of life, hand-in-hand with the one being whom the soul 40 MUCK-A-MUCK. claims as its affinity. But what am I saying ?"— and the deHcate-mindcd girl hid her face in her hands. A long silence ensued, which was at length bro- ken by her companion. " Ef you mean you're on the marry," he said, thoughtfully, " I ain't in no wise partikler !" " My husband," faltered the blushing girl ; and she fell into his arms. In ten minutes more the loving couple had landed at Judge Tompkins's. CHAPTER VI. 1 i^ A YEAR has passed away. Natty Bumpo was returning from Gold Hill, where he had been to purchase provisions. On his way to Donner Lake, rumors of an Indian uprising met his ears. " Dern their pesky skins, ef they dare to touch my Jenny,' he muttered between his clenched teeth. It was dark when he reached the borders of the lake. Around a glittering fire he dimly discerned dusky figures dancing. They were in war paint. Conspicuous among them was the renowned Muck- a-Muck. But why did the fingers of Natty Bumpo tighten convulsively around his rifle 1 MUCK-A-MUOK. 47 Tno chief lield in his hand long tufts of raven hair. The heart of the pioneer sickened as ho recognized the chistering curls of Genevra. In a moment his rifle was at his shoulder, and with a sharp " ping," Muck-a-Muck leaped into the air a corpse. To knock out the brains of the remaining savages, tear the tresses from the stiflening hand of Muck-a-Muck, and dash rapidly forward to the cot- tage of Judge Tompkins, was the work of a moment. He burst open the door. Wliy did he stand transfixed with open mouth and distended eye- balls? Was the sight too horrible to be borne? On the contrary, before him, in her peerless beauty, stood Genevra Tompkins, leaning on her father's arm. " Ye'r not scalped, then !" gasped her lover. " No. I have no hesitation in saying that I am not ; but why this a bruptness T responded Genevra. Bumpo could not speak, but frantically produced the silken tresses. Genevra turned her face aside. " Why, that's her waterfall !" said the Judge. Bumpo sank fainting to the floor. The famous Pike chieftain never recovered from the deceit, and refused to marry Genevra, who di( d, twenty years afterwards, of a broken heart. Judge Tompkins lost his fortune in Wild Cat. The stage passes twice a-week the deserted cottage at Donner Lake. This was the death of Muck-a-Muck avenged. TERENCE DENVILLE. BY CH — L — S L— V— R. CHAPTER I. ^ "it, MY HOME. The little village of Pilwiddle is one of the smallest and obscurest hamlets on the western coast of Ireland. On a lofty crag, overlooking the hoarse Atlantic, stands " Denville's Shot Tower " — a corruption by the peasantry of UEnville^a ChateaUf so called from my great-grandfather," Phelim St. Eemy d'Enville, who assumed the name and title of a French heiress with whom he ran away. To this fact my familiar knowledge and excellent pronunciation of the French language may be attributed, as well as many of the events which covered my after life. The Denvilles were always passionately fond of iield sports. At the age of four, I was already the boldest nd'«r and the best shot in the countrv. TERENCE DENVILLE. 40 .! When only eight, I won the St. Romy Cup at tho Pilwiddle races, — riding my favorite bloodmare Hellfire. As I approached the stand amidst tho plaudits ot the assembled multitude, and cries of " Thrue for yo, Masther Terence," and " 0, but it's a Dinvillo !" there was a slight stir among the gentry, who f^ irrounded the Lord Lieutenant, and other titled personages whom the race had attracted thither. " How young he is, — a mere child ; and yet how noble-looking," said a sweet low voice, which thrilled my soul. I looked up and met the full liquid orbs of the Hon. Blanche FitzroY Sackville, youngest daughter of the Lord Lieutenant. She blushed deeply. I turned pale and almost fainted. But the cold sneering tones of a masculine voice sent the blood back again into my youthful cheek. " Very likely the ragged scion of one of these banditti Irish gentry, who has taken naturally to * the road.' He should be at school — though I warrant me his knowledge of Terence will not extend beyond his own name," said Lord Henry Somerset, aid-de-camp to the Lord Lieutenant. A moment and I was perfectly calm, though cold as ice. Dismounting, and stepping to the side of the speaker, I said in a low, firm voice : — ** Had your Lordship read Terence more carefully, n 50 TERENCE DENVILLE. m •I, you would have learned that banditti are sometimes proficient in other arts beside horsemanship," and I touched his holster significantly with my hand. I had not read Terence myself, but with the skillful audacity of my race I calculated that a vague allusion, coupled with a threat, would embarrass him. It did. "Ah— what mean youl" he said, white with rage. "Enough, we are observed," I replied; "Father Tom wiU wait on you this evening ; and to-morrow morning, my lord, in the glen below Pilmddle we will meet again." " Father Tom — glen !" ejaculated the Englishman, with genuine surprise. " What 1 do priests carry challenges and act as seconds in your infernal country V " Yes !" I answered, scornfully, " why should they not ? Their services are more often necessary than those of a surgeon," I added significantly, turning away. The party slowly rode off, with the exception of the Hon. Blanche Sackville, who lingered for a moment behind. In an instant I was at her side Bending her blushing face over the neck of her white filly, she said hurriedly : — " Words have passed between Lord Somerset and TERENOE DENVILLE. 51 yourself. You are about to fight. Don't deny it — but hear me. You will meet him — I know your skill of weapons. He will be at your mercy. I entreat you to spare his life !" I hesitated. " Never !" I cried passionately ; <* he has insulted a Denville !" " Terence," she whispered, " Terence — for my sake r The blood rushed to my cheeks, and her eyes sought the ground in bashful confusion. " You love him then T I cried, bitterly. " No, no," she said, agitatedly, " no, you do me wrong. I — I — cannot explain myself. My father I — ^the Lady Dowager Sackville — ^the estate of Sack- ville — ^the borough — my uncle, Fitzroy Somerset. Ah I what am I saying % Forgive me. Terence," she said, as her beautiful head sank on my shoulder, " you know not what I suffer I" I seized her hand and covered it with passionate kisses. But the high-bred English girl, recovering something of her former hauteur^ said hastily, " Leave me, leave me, but promise I" " I promise," I replied enthusiastically ; " I will spare his life !" " Thanks, Terence, — thanks !" and disengaging her hand from my lips, she rode rapidly away. The next morning, the Hon. Captain Henry < I mi 52 TERENCE DENVILLE. Somerset and myself exchanged nineteen shots in the glen, and at each fire I shot away a button from his uniform. As my last bullet shot off the last button from hib siecv^e, I remarked quietly, "You seem now, my lord, to be almost as ragged as the gentry you sneered at," and rode haughtily away. CHAPTER II. THE PIOHTINQ PIPTY-SIXTH. When I was nineteen years old my father sold the Chateau d'Enville and purchased my commis- sion in the " Fifty-sixth " with the proceeds. " I say, Denville," said young McSpadden, a boy-faced ensign, who had just joined, " you'll represent the estate in the Army, if you won't in the House.'* Poor fellow, he paid for his meaningless joke with his life, for I shot him through the heart the next morning. " You're a good fellow, Denville," said the poor boy faintly, as I knelt beside him : " good by !" For the first time since my grandfather's death I wept. I could not help thinking that I would have been a better man if Blanche — ^but why proceed 1 Was she not now in Florence — ^the belie of the English Embassy. "■ TERENCE DENVILLE. 53 ■ But Napoleon had returned from Elba. Europe was in a blaze of excitement. The Allies were pre- paring to resist the Man of Destiny. We were ordered from Gibraltar home, and were soon again en route for Brussels. I did not regret that I was to be placed in active service. I was ambitious, and longed for an opportunity to distinguish my- self. My garrison life in Gibraltar had been mono- tonous and dull. I had killed five men in duel, and had an affair with the colonel of my regiment, who handsomely apologized before the matter as- sumed a serious aspect. I have been twice in love. Yet these were but boyish freaks and follies. I wished to be a man. The time soon came, — the morning of Waterloo. But why describe that momentous battle, on which the fafe of the entire world was hanging ? Twice were the Fifty-sixth surrounded by French cuiras- siers, and twice did we mow them down by our fire. I had seven horses shot under me, and was mounting the eighth, when an orderly rose up has- tily, touched his cap, and, handing me a despatch, galloped rapidly away. I opened it hurriedly and read : — " Let Picton advance immediately on the RIGHT." I saw it all. at a glance. I had been mistaken ^r 1 'Si i 1 54 TERENCE DENVILLE. for a general officer. But what was to be done Picton's division was two miles away, only accessi- ble through a heavy cross fire of artillery and mus= ketry. But my mind was made up. In an instant I was engaged with an entire squad- ron of cavalry, who endeavored to surround me. Cutting my way through them, I advanced boldly upon a battery and sabred the gunners before they could bring their pieces to bear. Looking around, I saw that I had in fact penetrated the French cen- tre. Before I was well aware of the locality, I was hailed by a sharp voice in French, — " Come here, sir !" I obeyed, and advanced to the side of a little man in a cocked hat. " Has Grouchy come "?" " Not yet, sire," I replied, — for it was the Em- peror. " Ha !" he said suddenly, bending his piercing eyes on my uniform ; " a prisoner 1" " No, sire," I said, proudly. " A spy r I placed my hand upon my sword, but a gesture from the Emperor bade me forbear. " You are a brave man," he said. I took my sn iff-box from my pocket, and, taking a pinch, replied by handing it, with a bow, to the Emperor, ■< TERENCE DENVILLB. 55 His quick eye caught the cipher on the lid. "What? a D'Enville? Ha! this accounts for the purity of your accent. Any relation to Rode- rick d'EnviUe 1" " My father, sire." " He was my schoolfellow at the Ecole Polytech- nique. Emhrace me 1" And the Emperor fell upon my neck in the presence of his entire staff. Then, recovering himself, he gently placed in my hand his own magnificent snuff-box, in exchange for mine, and hanging upon my breast the cross of the Legion of Honor which he took from his own, he bade one of his Marshals conduct me back to my regiment. I was so intoxicated with the honor of which I had been the recipient, that on reaching our lines I uttered a shout of joy and put spurs to my horse. The intelligent animal seemed to sympathize with my feelings, and fairly flew over the ground. On a rising eminence a few yards before me stood a gray- haired officer, surrounded by liis staff. I don't know what possessed me, but putting spurs to my horse, I rode at him boldly, and with one bound cleared him, horse and all. A shout of indignation arose from the assembled staff. I wh^^elad ^^uddenly, with the intention of apologizing, but my mare misun- derstood me, and, again dashing forward, once more 56 TERENCE DENVILLE.- m '':\ 1 y ji:. vaulted over the head of the officer, this time imfor- tunatelj uncovering him by a vicious kick of her hoof. " i^eize him !" roared the entire army. I was seized. As the soldiers led me away, I asked the name of the gray-haired olhcer. "That — why, that's the Duke op Wellington !" I fainted. # ^ # # # For six months I had brain-fever. During my illness ten grapeshot were extracted from my body which I had unconsciously received during the battle. When I opened my eyes I met the sweet glance of a Sister of Charity. " Blanche !" I stammered feebly. " The same," she replied. "You here r *• Yes, dear ; but hush ! It 's a long story. You see, dear Terence, your grandfather married my great-aunt's sister, and your father again married my grandmother's niece, who, dying without a will, was, according to the French law — " " But I do not comprehend," I said. " Of course not," said Blanche,with her old sweet smile ; " you 've had brain-fever ; so go to sleep." I understood, however, that Blanche loved me ; and I am now, dear reader. Sir Terence Sackville, K..C.B., and Ludy Blanche is Lady Sackville. SELINA SEDILIA. By miss M. E. B— DD— N and MRS. H— N—Y W— D. CHAPTEK I. The sun was setting over Sloperton Grange, and reddened the window of the lonely chamber in the western tower, supposed to be haunted by Sir Ed- ward Sedilia, the founder of the Grange. In the dreamy distance arose the gilded mausoleum of I.ady Felicia Sedilia, who haunted that portion of Sedilia Manor, known as " Stiff-uns Acre." A little to the left of the Grange might have been seen a moulder- ing ruin, known as *^ Guy's Keep," haunted by the spirit of Sir Guy Sedilia, who was found, one morning, crushed by one of the fallen battlements. Yet, as the setting sun gilded these objects, a beau- tiful and almost holy calm seemed diffused about the Grange. The Lady 3elina sat by an oriel window, over- looking the park. The sun sank gently in the 58 SELINA SEDILIA. bosom of the German Ocean, and yet the lady did not lift her beautiful head from the finely curved arm and diminutive hand which supported it. When darkness finally shrouded the landscape she started, for the sound of horse-hoofs clattered over the stones of the avenue. She had scarcely risen before an aristocratic young man fell on his knees before her. " My Selina !" " Edgardo ! You here V "Yes, dearest." " And — you — you — have — seen nothing V said the lady in an agitated voice and nervous manner, turning her face aside to conceal her emotion. "Nothing — that is, nothing of any account," said Edgardo. " I passed the ghost of your aunt in the park, noticed the spectre of your uncle in the ruined keep, and observed the familiar features of the spirit of your great-grandfather at his usual post. But nothing beyond these trifles, my Selina. Nothing more, love, absolutely nothing." The young man turned his dark liquid orbs fondly upon the ingenuous face of his betrothed. " My own Edgardo ! — and you still love me 1 You still wonld marry me in spite of this dark mystery which surrounds me 1 In spite of the fatal liistory of my race 1 In spite of the ominous pre- dictions of my aged nurse V HBLINA 8EDILIA. 59 did liTed it. she )ver risen lees " I would, Selina ;" and the young man passed his arm around her yielding waist. Tlie two lovers gazed at each other's faces in unspeakable bliss. Suddenly Selina started. " Leave me, Edgardo ! leave me ! A mysterious something — a fatal misgiving — a dark ambiguity — an equivocal mistrust oppresses me. I would be alone !" The young man arose, and cast a loving glance on the lady. " Then we will be married on the seventeenth." " The seventeenth," repeated Selina, with a mys- terious shudder. They embraced and parted. As the clatter of hoofs in the court-yard died away, the Lady Selina sank into the chair she had just quitted. "The seventeenth," she repeated slowly, with the same fateful shudder " Ah ! — what if he should know that I have another husband living ! Dare I reveal to him that I have two legitimate and three natural children 1 Dare I repeat to him the history of my youth t Dare I confess that at the age of seven I poisoned my sister, by putting verdigris in her cream-tarts, — that I threw my cousin from a swing at the age of twelve 1 That tlio lady's-maid who incurred the displeasure of my girlhood now lies at the bottom of the horse-pond 1 No ! no ! he 60 fcJELINA SEDILIA. I is too pure, — too goot], — too innocent, to hear such improper conversation !" and her wliolo body writhed as slio rocked to and fro in a paroxysm of grief. But she was soon cahn. Kising to her feet, she opened a secret panel in the wall, and revealed a slow-match ready for lighting. '* This match," said the Lady Selina, " is con- nected with a mine beneath the western tower, where my three children are confined ; another branch of it lies under the parish church, where the record of my first marriage is kept. I have only to light this match and the whole of my past life is swept away !" She approached the match with a lighted candle. But a hand was laid upon her arm, and with a shriek the Lady Selina fell on her knees before the spectre of Sir Guy. her CHAPTEE II. I if " Forbear, Selina," said the phantom in a hollow voice. " Why should I forbear 1" responded Selina haughtily, as she recovered her courage. "You know the secret of our race." " I do. Understand me,-— I do not object to SELINA 8EDILIA. 61 Juch khecl sho led a to the eccentricities of your youth. I know the fear- ful destiny which, pursuing you, led you to poison your sister and drown your lady's-maid. I know tlie awful doom which I have broughu upon tliis house ! But if you make away with these child" ren— " " Well/' said the Lady Selina, hastily. "They will haunt you!" " Well, I fear them not," said Selina, drawing her superb figure to its full height. " Yes, but, my dear child, what place are they to haunt 1 The ruin is sacred to your uncle's spirit. Your aunt monopolizes the park, and, I must bo allowed to state, not unfrequently trespasses upon the grounds of others. The horse-pond is frequent- ed by the spirit of your maid, and your murdered sister walks these corridors. To be plain, there is no room at Sloperton Grange for another ghost. I cannot have them in my room, — for you know I don't like children. Think of this, rash girl, and forbear ! WoiUd you, Selina," said the phantom, mournfully, — " would you force your great-grand- father's spirit to take lodgings else :vhere T Lady Selina's hand trembled ; the lighted candle fell from her nerveless fingers. " No," she cried passionately ; " never !" and fell fainting to the floor. 62 SELINA SEDILIA. R I ' ail ; ml '--i I i'\ CHAPTER III. Edgardo galloped rapidly towards Sloperton. Wlioii tlio outline of the Grange had faded away in the darkness, he reined his magnificent steed beside the ruins of Guy's Keep. " It wants but a few minutes of the hour," he said, consulting his watch by the light of the moon. " He dare not break his word. Ho will come." He paused, and peered anxiously into the darkness. " But come what may, she is mine," he continued, as his thoughts reverted fondly to the fair lady he had quitted. *' Yet if she knew all. If she knew that I were a disgraced and ruined man, — a felon and an outcast. If she knew that at the age of fourteen I murdered my Latin tutor and forged my uncle's will. If she knew that I had three wives already, and that the fourth victim of mis- placed confidence and my unfortunate peculiarity is expected to be at Sloperton by to-night's train with her baby. But no ; she must not know it. Constance must not arrive. Burke the Slogger must attend to that. " Ha ! here he is ! Well V These Avords were addressed to a ruffian in a HELINA 8EDILIA. 63 ton. |way teed slouched hat, who suddenly appeared from Guy*H Keep. ** I bo's here, measter," said the villian, with a disgracefully low accent and complete disregard of grammatical rules. • " It is well. Listen : I'm in possession of facts that will send you to the gallows. I know of the murder of Bill Smithers, the robbery of the toll- gate-keeper, and the making away of the youngest daughter of Sir Reginald do Walton. A word from me, and the officers of justice are on your track." Burke the Slogger trembled. " Hark ye ! serve my purpose, and I may yet save you. The 5.30 train from Clapham will bo due at Sloperton at 9.25. It must not arrive!" The villian's eyes sparkled as ho nodded at Ed- gardo. " Enough, — you understand ; leave me !" CHAPTER IV. About half a mile from Sloperton Station the South Clapham and Medway line crossed a bridge over Sloperton-on-Trent. As the shades of eveiiiiig were closing, a man in a slouched hat might have been seen carrying a saw and axe under his arm, % 64 SELINA SEDILIA. I it hanging about the bridge. From time to time he disappeared in the shadow of its abutments, but the sound of a saw and axe still betrayed his vicinity. At exactly nine o'clock he reappeared, and, crossing to the Sloperton side, rested his shoulder against the abuutment and gave a shove. The bridge swayed a moment, and then fell with a splash into the water, leaving a space of one hundred feet between the two banks. This done, Burke the Slogger, — for it was he, — with a fiendish chuckle seated himself on the divided railway track and awaited the coming of the train. A shriek from the woods announced its approach. For an instant Burke the Slogger saw the glaring of a red lamp. The ground trembled. The train was going with fearful rapidity. Another second and it had reached the bank. Burke the Slogger uttered a fiendish laugh. But the next moment the train leaped across the chasm, strilting the rails exactly even, and, dashing out the life of Burke the Slogger, sped away to Sloperton. The first object that greeted Edgardo, as he rode up to the station on the arrival of the train, was the body of Burke the Slogger hanging on the cow- catcher ; the second was the face of his deserted wife looking from the windows of a second-class carriage. m in SELINA SEDILIA. 65 he the lity. ising linst lidge linto feet the ckle and CHAPTER V. A NAMELESS tenor seemed to have taken posses- sion of Clarissa, Lady Selina's maid, as she rushed into the presence of her mistress. " my lady, such news !" " Explain yourself," said her mistress, rising. " An accident has happened on the railway, and a man has been killed. " What — not Edgardo !" almost screamed Selina. " No, Burke the Slogger !" your ladyship. "My first husband !" said Ladj^ Selina, sinking on her knees. " Just Heaven, I thank thee !" CHAPTER VI. The morning of the seventeenth dawned brightly over Sloperton. " A fine day for the wedding," said the sexton to Swipes, the butler of Sloperton Grange. The aged retainer shook his head sadly. " Alas 1 there's no trusting in signs ! " he continued. Seventy-five years ago, on a day like this, my young mistress — " But he was cut short by the appear- ance of a stranger. 66 HELINA BEDILIA. I " I would SCO Sir Edgardo," said the now-comer, impatiently. The bridegroom, who, with the rest of the wed- ding-tram, was about stepping into the carriage to proceed to the parish church, drew the stranger aside. " It 's done !" said the stranger, in a hoarse whisper, " Ah ! and you buried her 1" " With the others !" " Enough. jS"© more at present. Meet me after the ceremony, and you shall have your reward." The stranger shuffled away, and Edgardo returned to his bride. " A trifling matter of business I had forgotton, my dear Selina ; let us proceed." And the young man pressed the timid hand of his blush- ing bride as he handed her into the carriage. The cavalcade rode out of the court-yard. At the same moment, the deep bell on Guy's Keep tolled ominously. CHAPTER VII. Scarcely had the weeding-train left the Grange, than Alice Sedilia, youngest daughter of Lady Selina, made her escape from the western tower, owing to a lack of watchfulness on the part of 1 1 SELINA SEDILIA. 67 5r, 3d- to jer rsc ;er Clarissa. The innocent child, freed from restraint, rambled through the lonely corridors, and finally, opening a door, found herself in her mother's oou- doir. For some time she amused herself by examin- ing the various ornaments and elegant trifles witli which it was filled. Then, in pursuance of a childish freak, she dressed herself in her mother's laces and ribbons. In this occupation she chanced to toucli a peg which proved to be a spring that opened a secret panel in the wall. Alice uttered a cry of delight as she noticed what, to her childish fancy, appeared to be the slow-match of a fire-work. Taking a lucifer match in her hand she approached the fuse. She hesitated a moment. What would her mother and her nurse say ? Suddenly the ringing of the chimes of Sloperton parish church met her ear. Alice knew that the sound signified that the marriage party had entered the church, and that she was secure from interrup- tion. "With a childish smile upon her lips, Alice Sedilia touched off the slow-match. 68 SALINA SEDILIA. in li'i- is;.). CHAPTER VIII. At exactly two o'clock on the seventeenth, Rupert Sedilia, who had just returned from India, was thoughtfully descending the hill toward Sloper- ton manor. " If I can prove that my aunt Lady Selina was married before my father died, I can establish my claim to Sloperton Grange," he uttered, half aloud. He paused, for a sudden trembling of the earth beneath his feet, and a terrific explosion, as of a park of artillery, arrested his progress. At the same moment he beheld a dense cloud of smoke en- velop the churchyard of Sloperton, and the western tower^f the Grange seemed to be lifted bodily from its foundation. The air seemed filled with falling fragments, and two dark objects struck the earth close at his feet. Rupert picked them up. One seemed to be a heavy volume bound in brass. A cry burst from his lips. " The Parish Records." He opened the volume hastily. It contained the marriage of Lady Selina to " Burke the Slogger." The second object proved to be a piece of parch- ment. He tore it open with trembling fingers. It was the missing will of Sir James Sedilia ! m 8EMNA 8BDILIA. 69 CHAPTEK IX. When the bells again rang on the new parish church of Sloperton it was for the marriage of Sir Rupert Scdilia and his cousin, the only remaining members of the family. Five more ghosts were added to the supernatural population of Sloperton Grange. Perhaps this was the reason why Sir Rupert sold the property shortly afterward, and that for many years a dark shadow seemed to hang over the ruins of Sloperton Grx&nge* I if n u I ^" THE NINETY-NINE GUARDSMEN. By AL— X—D—R D— M—S. CHAPTER I. 8H0WING THE QUALITY OF THE CUSTOMERS OF THE INN-KEEPER OF PROVINS. Twenty years after, the gigantic innkeeper of Provins stood looking at a cloud of dust on the highway. This cloud of dust betokened the approach of a traveller. Travellers had been rare that season on the highway between Paris and Provins. The heart of the innkeeper rejoiced. Turning to Dame Perigord, his wife, he said^ stroking his white apron : — " St. Denis ! make haste and spread the cloth. Add a bottle of Charlevoix to the table. This traveller, who rides so fast, by his pace must be a Monseigneur." _ , THE NINEIT-NINE GUARDSMEN. 71 Truly the traveller, clad in the uniform of a musketeer, as he drew up to the door of the hostel- ry, did not seem to have spared his horse. Throw- ing his reins to the landlord, he leaped lightly to the ground. He was a young man of four-and- twenty, and spoke with a slight Gascon accent. "1 am hungry, Morhleu ! I wish to dine !" The gigantic innkeeper bowed and led the way to a neat apartment, where a table stood covered with tempting viands. The musketeer at once set to work. Fowls, fish, pdfes disappeared ^ before him. Perigord sighed as he witnessed the devastations. Only once the stranger paused. " Wine !" Perigord brought wine. The stranger drank a dozen bottles. Finally he rose to depart. Turning to the expectant landlord, he said : — "Charge it." " To whom, your highness T said Perigord, anxiously. " To his Eminence !" " Mazarin !" ejaculated the innkeeper. " The same. Bring me my horse," and the mus- keteer, remounting his favorite animal, rode away. The innkeeper slowly turned back into the inn. Scarcely had he reached the courtyard before the clatter of hoofs again called him to the doorway. A young musketeer of a light and graceful figure rode up. ^- 73 THE NINETY-NINE GUARDSMEN. :ii iH i t\ i " ^arbleUf my dear Perigord, I am famishing. y^-' ! it have you got for dinner?" " \ onison, capons, larks, and pigeons, your excel- lency," iv;i»lied the obsequious landlord, bowing to the ground. " Enough !" The young musketeer dismounted and entered the inn. Seating himself at the table replenished by the careful Perigord, he speedily swept it r,s clean as the first comer. " Some wine, my brave Perigord," said the grace- ful young musketeer, as soon as he could find utter- ance. Perigord brought three dozen of Charlevoix. The young man emptied them almost at a draught. *'By-by, Perigord," he said lightly, waving his hand, as, preceding the astonished landlord, he slowly withdrew. "But, your highness, — the bill," said the as- tounded Perigord. "Ah, the bill. Charge it !" " To whom r "The Queen!" " What, Madame r " The same. Adieu, my good Perigord." And the graceful stranger rode away. An interval of quiet succeeded, in which the innkeeper gazed wofuUy at his wife. Suddenly he was startled by THE NINETY-NINE GUARDSMEN. 75 a clatter of hoofs, and an aristocratic figure stood in the doorway. " Ah," said the courtier, good-naturedly. " What, do my eyes deceive nie ? No, it is the festive and luxurious Perigord. Pcrigorc' xis^^n. I famish. I languish. I would dine." The innkeeper again < "e ed the table with viands. Again it was swept ;lean as the fields of Egypt before the miraculc s ./arm of locusts. The stranger looked up. " Bring me another foAvl, my Perigord." " Impossible, your excellency; the larder is strip- ped clean." " Another flitch of bacon, then." " Impossible, your highness ; there is no more." " WeU, then, wine !" The landlord brought one hundred and forty-four bottles. The courtier drank them all. " One may drink if one cannot eat," said the aristocratic stranger, good-humoredly. The innkeeper shuddered. The guest rose to depart. The innkeeper came slowly forward with his bill, to which he had cov- ertly added the losses which he had suffered from the previous strangers. "Ah, thebUl. Charge it." " Charge it I to whom r • 74 THE NINETY-NINE GUARDSMEN. T m ,L;t i 'Kii'i, i 1 m ii i " To the King," said tho guest. *' What ! his Majesty 1" ** Certainly. Farowcll, Pcrigord." The innkeeper groaned. Then he went out and took down his sign. Then remarked to his wife : *' I am a plain man, and don't understand poli- tics. It seems, however, that the country is in a troubled state. Between his Eminence the Cardi- nal, his Majesty the King, and her Majesty the Queen, I am a ruined man." " Stay," said Dame Perigord, " I have an idea." " And that is—" " Become yourself a musketeer." ^ CHAPTEE II. rf; 'i If. ' ' THE COMBAT. On ieuving Provins the first musketeer proceeded to Nangis, where he was reinforced by thirty-three followers The second musketeer, arriving at Nan- gis at the same moment, placed himself at the head of thirty-three more. The third guest of the land- lord of Provins arrived in Nangis in time to assem- ble together thirty-three other musketeers. I THE NINETY-NINE GUARDSMEN. 75 The first stranger led the troops of his Eiuinonce. The second led the troops of the Queen. The third led the troops of the King. The fight commenced. It raged terribly for seven hours. The first musketeer killed thirty of the Queen's troops. The second musketeer killed thirty of the King's trocps. The third musketeer killed thirty of his Eminence's troops. By this time it will be perceived the number of musketeers had been narrowed down to four on each side. Naturally the three principal warriors approached each other. They simultaneously uttered a cry. " Aramis !" "Athos!" "D'Artagnan!" They fell into each other's arms. " And it seems that we are fighting against each other, my children," said the Count de la Fere, mournfully. " How singular !" exclaimed Aramis and D'Ar- tagnan. " Let us stop this fratricidal warfare," said Athos. ** We will !" they exclaimed together. " But how to disband our followers 1" querried D'Artagnan. re THE NINETY-NINE GUARDSMEN. Aramia winkod. Thoy understood each other. " Let iiH cut 'eiu down !" Tliey cut 'em down. Aramis killed three. D'Ar- tagnan three. Athoa three. The friends again embraced. " How like old times/' said Aramis. " How touching !" exclaimed the serious and philosophic Count de la Fere. The galloping of hoofs caused them to withdraw from each other's embraces. A gigantic figure rapidly approached. " The innkeeper of Provins !" they cried, draw- ing their swords. " Perigord, down with him !" shouted D'Ar- tagnan. " Stay," said Athos. The gigantic figure was beside them. He ut+sred a cry. " Athos, Aramis, D'Artagnan I" " Porthos r' exclaimed the astonished trio. " The same." They all fell in each other's arms. The Count de la Fere slowly raised his hands to Heaven. " Bless you 1 Bless us, my children I However different our opinion may be in regard to politics, we have but one opinion in regard to our own merits. Where can you find a better man than Aramis V t THE NINETY-NINE GUARDSMEN. " Thau Porthos 1" said Araiiiin. " Than D'Artagnan V said Porthos. Thau Athos V said D'Artagnan. 77 (i I CHAPTER III. SHOWING HOW THE KING OF FRANCE WENT UP A LADDER. The King descended into the garden. Proceed- ing cautiously along the terraced walk, he came to the wall immediately below the windows of Ma- dame. To the left were two windows, concealed by vines. They opened into the apartments of La Valliere. The King sighed . " It is about nineteen feet to that window," said the King. " If I had a ladder about nineteen feet long, it would reach to that window. This is logic." Suddenly the King stumbled o\er somr>liing. " St. Denis !" he exclaimed, loolcing down. J t was a ladder, just nineteen feet long. The King placed it against the wall. In so doing, he fixed the lower end upon the abdomen of a man who lay concealed by the wall. The man ^ 78 THE NINETY-NINE GUARDSMEN. Ml I i did not utter a cry or wince. The King suspected nothing. He ascended the ladder. The ladder was too short. Lord the Grand was not a tall man, he was still two feet below the win- dovr. " Dear me," said the King. Suddenly the ladder was lifted two feet from below. This enabled the King to leap in at the window. At the farther end of the apartment stood a young girl with red hair and a lame leg. She was trembling with emotion. "Louise!" "The King!" " Ah, my God, mademoiselle I'* "Ah, my God, Sire!" But a low knock at the door interrupted the lov- ers. The King uttered a cry of rage ; Louise one .of despair. The door opened and D'Artagnan entered. " Good evening, sire, " said the musketeer. The King touched a bell. Porthos appeared in the doorway. " Good evening, sire." " Arrest M. D'Artagnan." Porthos looked at D'Artagnan, and did not move. The King almost turned purple with rage. He again touched the bell. Athos entered. ^ •; I THB NINETY-NINE GUARDSMEN. 79 " Coiint, arrest Porthos and D'Artagnan." The Count de la Fere glanced at Porthos and D'Artagnan and smiled sweetly. ^^ Sucre ! AVhere is Aramis?"said the King, violently. " Here, sire," and Aramis entered. " Arrest Athos, Porthos and D'Ai'tagnan." Aramis bowed and folded his arms. ** Arrest yourself." , Aramis did not move. The King shuddered and turned pale. " Am I not King of France T " Assuredly, sire ; but we are also severally Por- thos, Aramis, D'Artagnan and Athos." " Ah !" said the King. , "Yes, sire." " What does this mean ?" " It means, your Majesty," said Aramis, stepping forward, " that your conduct as a married man is highly improper. I am an Abb^, and I object to these improprieties. My friends here, D'Artagnan, Athos, and Porthos, pure-minded young men, are also terribly shocked. Observe, sire, how they blush." Athos, Porthos, and D'Artagnan blushed. "Ah," said the King, thoughtfully. "You teach me a lesson. You are devoted and noble I- }l<:i 80 THE NINETY-NINE GUARDSMAN. young gentlemen, but your only weakness is your excessive modesty. From this moment I will make you all Marshals and Dukes, with the exception of Aramis. " And me, sire ? " said Aramia. *' You shall be an Archbishop ! " The four friends looked up an 1 then rushed into each other s arms. The King embraced Louise de la Valliere, by way of keeping them company. A pause ensued. At last Athos spoke : " Swear, my children, that, next to yourselves, you will respect — the King of France ; and remem- ber that * Forty years after ' we will meet again." THE DWELLER OF THE THRESHOLD. BY SIR ED — D L TT — N U — LW — K. -♦ BOOK I. THE PROMPTINGS OF THE IDEAL. It was noon. Sir Edward had stepped from his brougham and was proceeding on foot down the Strand. He wao dressed with his usual faultless taste, but in alighting from his vehicle his foot had slipped, and a small round disk of conglomerated soil, which instantly appeared on his high arched instep, marred the harmonious glitter of his boots. Sir Edward was fastidious. Casting his eyes around, at a little distance he perceived the stand of a youth- ful bootblack. Thither he sauntered, and carelessly placing his fooi on the low stool, he waited the application of the polisher's art. " 'T is true," said Sir Edward to himself, yet half aloud, " the contact of the Foul and the Disgusting mars the general effect 8? THE DWBLLER OF THE THRESHOLD. i' if h of the Shiny and the Beautiful — and, yet, why am T here 1 I repeat it, cahnly and deliberately — why am I here ? Ha ! Boy ! " The Boy loooked up — his dark Italian eyes glanced intelligently at the Philosopher, and as with one hand he tossed back his glossy curls from his marble brow, and with the other he spread the equally glossy Day & Martin over the Baronet's boot, he answered in deep rich tonea : '^ The Ideal is subjective to the Keal. The exercise of apper- ception gives a distinctiveness to idiocracy, which Is, however, subject to the limits of Me. You are an admirer of the Beautiful, sir. You wish your boots blacked. T)"- Beautiful is attainable by means of the Coir., "Ah," said Sir Edward thoughtfully, gazing upon the almost c^upernal be^^Aity of the Child before him ; " you speak well. You have read Kant" The boy blushed deeply. He drew a copy of Kant from his blouse, but in his confusion several other volumes dropped from his bosom on the ground. The baronet picked them up. "Ah!" said the Philosopher, " what's . this ] Cicero's (le Senednfe, at your age, too ? MartiaVs Kpigrauts, Ccesar's Commentaries. What ! a classi- cal scholar % " " E pluribus Unum. Nux vomica. Nil despe- THE DWELLER OF THE THRESHOLD. .^•'» 8«» randimi. Nihil fit ! " said the Boy, enthusiastically. The Philosopher gazed at the Child. A strange presence seemed to transfuse and possess him. Over the brow of the Boy glittered the' pale nimbus of the Student.. "Ah, and Schiller's Robbers, too?" queried the PhOosopher. " Eas ist ausgespielt, said the Yioy, modestly." " Then you have read my translation of Schillfv^s Balladd ? " continued the Baronet, "vvith some sliow of interest. " I have, and infinitely prefer them to the origi- nal," said the Boy, with intellectual warmth. * You have shown how in Actual life Ave strive for a Gal we cannot reaclr; how in the Ideal the C" il is attainable, and there effort is victory. You li ive given us the Antithesis wlii' i is a key io tli" Remainder, and constantly balances before us tlic conditions of the Actual and ihe privileges of tiie Ideal." " My very words," said ihe Baronet ; " wonder- ful, wonderful I" and he gazed fondly at the Italian boy, who again resumed his menial employment. Alas ! the wings of the Ideal were folded. The Student had been absorbed ir the Boy. But Sir Edward's boots \vere blacked, and ho turned to depart. Placing his hand upon the clus- ^ i'i ■/; W t 84 THE DWELLER OF THE THRESHOLD. -a ■ ;i teriug tendrils that surrounded the classic nob of the infant Italian, ho said softly, like a strain of dis- tant music : — "Boy, you have done weli. Love the Good. Protect the Innocent. Provide for The Indigent. Respect the Philosopher. . . . Stay I Can you tell me what is The True, The Beautiful, The Inno- cent, The Virtuous V " They are things that commcnoc with a capital letter," said the Boy, promptly. " Enough ! Eespect everything that commences with a capital letter ! Respect Me !" and drop- ping a half-penny in the hand of the boy, he departed. Tiie Boy gazed fixedly at the .coin. A frightful and instantaneous change overspread his features. His noble brow was corrugated with baser lines of calculation. His black eye, serpent-like, glittered v/ith suppressed passion. Dropping upon his hands and ioet, he crawled to the curbstone and hissed aite>' tlu, retreating form of the Baronet, the single Vuri • — ' . ■ "Bilk!" k THE DWELLER OP THE THRESHOLD. 85 BOOK II. IN THE WORLD. (( Eleven years ago," said Sir Edward to himself as liis brougham rolled him toward the Committee Room ; ''just eleven years ago my natural son dis- appeared mysteriously. I have no douht in the world but that this little bootblack is he. His mother died in Italy. He resembles his mother very much. Perhaps I ought to provide for hiuL Shall I disclose myself? No ! no ! Better he should taste the sweets of Labor. Penury ennobles the mind and kindles the love of the Beautiful. I will act to him, not like a Father, not like a Guardian, not like a Friend — but like a Philoso- pher !" With these words. Sir Edward entered the Com- mittee Eoom. His Secretary approached him. " Sir Edward, there are fears of a division in the House and the Prime Minister has sent for you." " I will be there," said Sir Edward, as he placed his hand on his chest and uttered a hollow cough. No one who heard the Baronet that night in his sarcastic and withering speech on the Drainage and I 66 THE DWELLER OF THE THRESHOLD. Sewcmgc Bill, would have recognized the lover of the Ideal and the Philosopher of the Beautiful. No one who listened to his eloquence would have dreamed of the Spartan resolution this iron man had taken in regard to the Jjost Boy — his own beloved Lionel. !None ! " A jfine speech from Sir Edward to-night," said Lord Billingsgate, as, arm-in-arm with the Premier, he entered \m, carriage. ** Yes ; but how dreadfully he coughs I" " Exactly. Dr. Bolus says his lungs are entirely gone ; he breathes entirely by an effort of will, and altogether independent of pulmonary a;=jsistance." " How strange !' and the carriage rolled away. BOOK IIL " Adon Ai, appear, appear !" And as the Seer spoke, the awful Presence glided out of Kothingncss, and sat, Sphinx-like, at the feet of the Alchemist. ** I am come !" said the Thing. " You should say, * I have come,' — it's better grammar," said the Boy-iS'eophyte, thoughtfully accenting the substituted expression. THE DWELLER OF THE THRESHOLD. m V of ruivo luid 'V(hI " Hush, rash Boy," said the Seer, sternly. "Would you oppose your feeble knowledge to the intinite intelligence of the Unmistakable 1 A word and you are lost forever." The Boy breathed a silent prayer, and, handing a sealed package to the Seer, begged him to hand it to his father in case of his premature decease. " You have sent for me," hissed the Presence. " Behold me, Apokatharticon, — the Unpronounce- able. In me all things exist that are not already co-existent. I am the Unattainable, the Intangible, the Cause, and the Effect. In me observe the Brahma of Mr. Emerson ; not only Brahma himself, but also the sacred musical composition rehearsed by the faithful hindoo. I am the real Gyges. None others are genuine." And the veiled Son of the Starbeam laid himself loosely about the room, and permeated Space gene- rally. "Unfathomable Mystery," said the Rosicrucian in a low, sweet voice. " Brave Child with the Vit* reous Optic ! Thou who pervadest all things and rubbest against us without abrasion of the cuticle. I command thee, speak ! " And the misty, intangible, indefinite Presence spoke. 88 THF DWBLLEU OF THE THKESHOLU. l.\ BOOK IV. MYSELF. After the events related in tlie Itist chapter, the reader will pen^eive that nothing wan easier tlian to reconcile Sir l^dward to his son Lionel, nor to resuscitate the heautiful Italian girl, who, it appears, was not dead, an- it > ors, and pictiirosqiu* blanket, dirt, disoaso, and an unsynunetrical contour. I obsorvo beneath liis in- flated rlietoric dcceipt and hypocrisy ; beneath liis physical hardihood, cruelty, malice, and rt^venge. The Noble Savage is a humbug. 1 remarked the same to Mr. Catlin." " Come," said the phantom. The Haunted Man sighed, and took out his watch. " Could n't we do the rest of this another time?" " My hour is almost spent, irreverent being, but there is yet a chance for your reformation. Come!" iVgain they sped through the night, and again halted. The sound of delicious but melancholy music fell upon their ears. ** 1 see," said the Haunted Man, with something of interest in his manner, — "1 see an old moss- covered manse beside a sluggish, flowing river. I see weird shapes : witches, Puritans, clergymen, lit- tle children, judges, mesmerized maidens, moving to the sound of melody that thrills me with its sweetness and purity. But, although carried along its calm and evenly flowing current, the shapes are strange and frightful : an eating lichen gnaws at the heart of each. Not only the clergymen, but witch, maiden, judge, and Puritan, all wear Scarlet Letters of some kind burned upon their hearts. I am fas- I.; TUB HAUNTED MAN. 99 riimie«l and thrilled, but I feel a morbid neiisiitivo- ueBS creeping over me. I — I beg your puidon." The (.Toblin was yawning frightfully. " Well, per- haps wo had better go." " One more, and the last," said the Goblin. They were moving homo. Streaks o'' red wore beginning to appear in the eastern sky. Along the banks of tlio blackly flowing river by moorland and stagnant fens, by low houses, clustering close to the water's edge, like strange mollusks, crawled upon the beach to dry ; by misty black barges, the more misty and indistinct seen through its mys- terious veil, the river fog was slowly rising. 80 rolled away and rose from the heart of the Haunted Man, etc., etc. They stopped before a quaint mansion of red brick. The Goblin waved his hand without speak- ing. " I stfl," said the Haunted Man, " a gay drawing- room. I see my old friends of the club, of the college, of society, even as they lived and moved* I see the gallant and unselfish men, whom I have loved, and the snobs whom I have hated. I see strangely mingling with them, and now and then blending with their forms, our old friends Dick Steel, Addison, and Congreve. I observe, though, that these gentlemen have a habit of getting too i 1 > .n 100 TIIF IIAUXTED MAN. I' ;,ii- i !ii i 'I % iniK.'li ill ili(5 way. 'I'lii' royal .staiidavtl of (^)uoom Anno, not in itself a heautifiil ornament, is vatlicr too ])rr)niin<'nt in the pictniT. The long gallcriuH of black oak, tin; formal fiuniture, the old jiortraitw, are picturesque, but depressing. The house is damj). I enjoy myself better here on the lawn, where th«y are gexting up a Vanity Fair. See, the bell rings, the curtain is vising, the puppets are brought out for a new jday. J.et me see." The Haunted Man was pressing forward in his eagerness, but the hand of the (Joblin stayed him, and pointing to his feet he saw, between him and the rising curtain, a new-made brave. And bend- ing above the grave in passionate grief, the Haunted Man beheld the phantoni of the previous night. * # # -H- * The Haunted Man started, and — woke. The bright sunshine streamed into the room. The air was sparkling with frost. He ran joyously to the window and opened it. A small boy saluted him with " Merry Christmas." The Haunted Man in- stantly gave him a Bank of England note. " How much like Tiny Tim, Tom, and Bobby that boy looked, — bless my soul, what a genius this Dickens has r A knock at the door, and Boots entered. " Consider your salary doubled instantly. Have you read David Gopperfield f llilli THE HAUNTED MAN. 101 " Yczziir." " Your salary is qnadriiplcnl. What ilo you tliink of the Old Ctin'osifi/ S/top ?" Thu man instantly Imrst into a torrent of tears, iiiid then into a roar of laughter. "Enough! Here are five thousand jjoumls. Open a porter-house, and eall it, *(lur Mutual Friend.' Huzza ! I feel so happy !" And the Haunted Man danced about the room. And so, bathed in the light of that blessed sun, and yet glowing with tlie warmth of a good action, the Haunted Man, haunted no longer, save by those shapes which make the dreams of children beautiful, reseated himself in his chair, and finished Our Mutual Friend. liii''A' MISS MIX. By CH— L— TTE BK— NTE. I' CHAPTER I. My earliest impressions are of a huge, missliapen rock, against which, the hoarse waves beat unceas- ingly. On this rock three pelicans are standing in a defiant attitude. A dark sky lowers in the back- ground, while two sea-gulls and a gigantic cormorant eye with extreme disfavor the floating corpse of a drowned woman in the foreground. A few brace- lets, coral necklaces, and other articles of jewellry, scattered around loosely, complete this remarkable picture. It is one which, in some vague, unconscious way, symbolizes, to my fancy, the character of a man. 1 have never been able to explain exactly why. I think 1 must have seen the picture in some illus- trated volume, when a baby, or my mother may have dreamed it before I was boni. MIHS MIX. 103 As a child I was not handsome. When I con- sulted the triangular bit of looking-glass which I always carried with me, it showed a pale, sandy, and freckled face, shaded by locks like the color of seaweed when the sun strikes it in dtep water. My eyes were said to be indistinctive ; they were a faint, ashen gray ; but above them rose — my only beauty — a high, massive, domelike forehead, with polished temples, like door-knobs of the purest porcelain. Our family was a family of governesses. My mother had been one, and my sisters had the same occupation. Consequently, when, at the age of thirteen, my eldest sister handed me the advertise- ment of Mr. Rawjester, clipped from that day's " Times," I accepted it as my destiny. Neverthe- less, a mysterious presentiment of an indefinite future haunted me in my dreams t^at night, as I lay upon my little snow-white bed. The next morning, with two bandboxes tied up in silk hand- kerchiefs, and a hair trunk, I turned my back upon Minerva Cottage forever. 104 MISS MIX. CHAPTER II. BluNderbore Hall, the seat of James Rawj ester, Esq., was encompassed by dark pines and funeral hemlocks on all sides. The wind sang weirdly in the turrets and moaned through the long-drawn avenues of the park. As I approached the house I saw several mysterious figures flit before the win- dows, and a yell of demoniac laughter answered my summons at the bell. AVhile I strove to repress my ^^:o.,'Y Torebodinga, the housekeeper, a timid, scared -looking old woman, showed me into the library. I entered, overcome with conflicting emotions. I was dressed in a narrow gown of dark serge, trimmed with black bugles. A thick green shawl was pinned across my breast. My hands wore creased with black half-mittens worked with stccl beads ; on my feet were large pattens, originally the property of my deceased grandmother. I carried a blue cotton umbrella. As I passed before a mirror, I could not help glancing at it, nor could I disguise from myself the fact that I was not handsome. Drawing a chair into a recess, I sat down with folded hands, calmly aAvaiting the arrival of my I £. \ MISS MIX. 105 awj ester, funeral irdly iu ig-drawn liouse I ;he win- ered my repress a timid, nto the motions, k serge, 1 shawl Is wore th stcul ally tiie arried a mirror, disguise lie. 'II with of my ► master. Once or twice a fearful yell rang through tlic house, or the rattling of chains, and curses uttered in a deep, manly voice, broke upon the oppressive stillness. I began to feel my soul rising with the emergency of the moment. " You look alarmed, miss. You don't hear any- thing, my dear, do you?" asked the housekeeper nervously. " Nothing whatever," I remarked calmly, as a terrific scream, followed by the dragging of chairs and tables in the room above, drowned for a momciit my reply. "It is the silence, on tlio contrary, which has made mo foolishly nervous." The housekeeper looked at me approvingly, and instantly made some tea for me. I drank seven cups ; as I was beginning the ""eighth, I heard a crash, and the next moment a man leaped into the room through the broken window. CHAPTER III. The crash started me from my self-control. Tlic housekeeper bent toward mo and Avhispercd : — " Don't be excited. It's Mr. .1-vawjestcr, — ho prefers to come in sometimes in this way. It's liis playfulness, ha ! ha ! ha !" 106 MISS MIX. If ii I perceive," I said calmly. " It's the unfettered imindse of a lofty soul breaking the tyrannizing bonds of custom." And I turned toward liim. He had never once looked at mc. He stood witli his back to the fire, which set off the hercu- lean breadth of his shoulders. His face was dark and expressive ; his under jaw squarely formed, and remarkably heavy. I was struck with his re- markable likeness to a Gorilla. As he absently tied the poker into hard knots with his nervous fingers, I watched him with some interest. Suddenly he turned toward me: — "Do you think I'm handsome, young woman?* " IS^ot classically beautiful," I returned calmly ; " but you have, if I may so express myself, an abstract manliness, — a sincere and wholesome bar- barity which, involving as it does the naturalness — " But I stopped, for he yawned at that moment, — an action which singularly developed the immense breadth of his lower jaw, — and I saw he had for- gotten me. Presently he turned to the house- keeper : — " Leave us." The old ivoman withdrew with a courtesy. Mr. Kawj ester deliberately turned his back upon me and remained silent for twenty minutes. I de iM.\ ifettered anniziiig liin. le stood e hercu- ^is dark formed, I his re- 'd knots til SOliii; roiiian V calmly ; ^self, an »me bar- Iness — " ment, — mmense lad for- lionse- ik upon ites. I MISS MIX. 107 M I drew my shawl the more closely around my shoul- ders and closed my eyes. " You are the governess ]" at length he said. " I am, sir." " A creature who teaches geography, arithmetic, and the use of the globes — ha I — a wretched rem- nant of femininity, — a skimp j^attern of girlhood with a premature flavor of tea-leaves and morality. Ugh !" I bowed my head silently. " Listen to me, girl !" he said sternly ; " this child you have come to teach — my ward — is not legiti- mate. She is the offspring of my mistress, — a common harlot. Ah! Miss Mix, what do you think of me now ]" "I admire," I replied calmly, ''your sincerity. A mawkish regard for delicacy might have kept this disclosure to yourself I only recognize in your frankness that perfect community of thought and sentiment which should exist between original natures." I looked up ; he had already forgotten my pres- ence, and wa£! engaged in pulling off his boots and coat. This done, he sank down in an arm-chair before the fire, and ran the poker wearily through his hair. I couM not help pitying him. i' ^iti i. i V- >\l: LajuHj 108 MISS MIX. Tiic wind liowlod dismally without, and the rain l)(!at furiously against tli(.^ windows. T crept toward him and seated myself on a low stool beside his cliair. Presently he turned, without seeing me, ami placed his foot absently in my lap. I atiected not to notice it. But he started and looked down. " You here yet — Carrothead ? Ah, I f(jrgot. Do you speak French 1" " Qui, Monsieur" " Taisez-vous f" he said sharply, with singular purity of accent. I complied. The wind moaned fearfully in the chimney, and the light burned dimly. I shuddered in spite of myself. " Ah, you tremble, girl !" " It is a fearful night." " Fearful ! Call you this fearful, ha ! ha ! ha ! Look ! you wretched little atom, look !" and he dashed forward, and, leaping out of the window, stood like a statue in the pelting storm, Avith folded arniF. He did not stay long, but in a few minutes returned by way of the hall chimney. I saw from the way that he wiped his feet on my dress that he had again forgotten my presence. " You are a governess. What can you teach V he asked, suddenly and fiercely thrusting his face in mine. ri" MISS MIX. 109 li tlio mill 'pt toward xisido liis 1110, and ected not own. I forgot. singular inoanod b burned "Ah, lia ! ]ia ! and he ivindow, h folded minutes w from that he teach V ■is face " Manners !'* I replied, calmly. " Ha ! teach me /" " You mistake yourself," I said, adjusting my mittens. " Your manners re(|uire not the artificial restraint of society. You are radically polite ; this impetuosity and ferociousness is simjdy the sincerity which is the basis of a proper dei)ortment. Your instincts are moral ; your better nature, I see is religious. As St. Paul justly remarks — see chap. 6, 8, 9, and 10—" He seized a heavy candlestick, and threw it at mo. I dodged it submissively but firmly. "Excuse me," he remarked, as his under jaw slowly relaxed. " Excuse me. Miss Mix — but I can't stand St. Paul ! Enough — you are engaged." CHAPTER IV. I FOLLOWED tho liousokoeper as she led the way timidly to my room. As we passed into a dark hall in the wing, I noticed that it was closed by an iron gate with a grating. Three of the doors on the corridor were likewise grated. A strange noise, as of shuffling feet and tho howling of infuriated animals, rang through the hall. Bidding the house- no MISS MIX. I m M f ! . > -ill: u -4:^ m keeper good-night, and taking the candle, I entered my beduhaniber. I took off my dress, and, putting on a yellow flannel nightgown, which I could not help feeling did not agree with my complexion, I composed myself to rest hy reading lilairs lihetoric and Palcjjs Moral Philosophy. I had just put out the light, when I heard voices in the corridor. I. lis- tened attentively. 1 recognized Mr. Eawj ester's stern tones. " Have you fed No. 1 ?" he asked. " Yes, sir," said a gruff voice, apparently belong- ing to a domestic. •' How's Xo. 2r " She's a little off her feed, just now, but will piclc up in a day or two !" " And No. 3 r '■ " Perfectly furious, sir. Her tantrums are un- governable." "Hush!" The voices died away, and I sank into a fitful slumber. I dreamed that I was wandering through a tropi- cal forest. Suddenly I saw the figure of a gorilla approaching me. As it neared me, I recognized the features of Mr. Rawj ester. He held his hand to e J MISS MIX. Ill ^ I entered 1 «* yello\v '<^'lp feeling (!ompo.se(l dorlc and )ut out the or. I lis- R«'iwj ester's Jy belong. ', but will h' s are un- to a fitful 1 a tropi- a gorilla iiized the hand to liis yido as if in pain. I saw ♦hat lie had been wounded, lie recognized me and calleil nic by name, but at the same moment the vision ehanged to an Ashantc village, where, around tlie fire, a group of negroes were dancing and participating in some wild Ohi festival. I awoke with the strain still ringing in my ears. " Hokee-pokee wokee fum !" Good Heavens ! coidd I be dreaming 1 I heard the voice distinctly on the floor below, and smelt something burning. I arose, with an indistinct presentiment of evil, and hastily putting some cotton in my ears and tying a towel about my head, I wrapped myself in a shawl and rushed down stairs. The door of Mr. Rawj ester's room was open. I entered. Mr. ElUwj ester lay apparently in a deep slumber, from which even the clouds of smoke that came from . the burning curtains of his bed could not rouse him. Around the room a large and poAverful negress, scantily attired, with her head adorned with feathers, was dancing wildly, accompanying herself with bone castanets. It looked like some terrible fetich. I did not lose my calmness. After firmly empty- ing the pitcher, basin, and slop-jar on the burning 112 MISH MIX. I t . • • 1 ''I III: *l fcit Ik'<1, J jn(iiec(k>(l ciiutiously to tlio ganU'ii, and, returning' with the giirdoii-ongiiio, I directed u small stream at Mr. liawjester. At luy entrance the j^'igantic nogrcss lied. ]\Ir. Raw jester yawiu'il and woke. [ exi)laine(l to him, as he rose drippi:';.^ iVom the bed, the reason (jf my ])r('sencc. lie did n ::t sc'ni to he excited, alarmed, or discomposed. He gi'^' 1 at me curiously. " 8o you risked your life to save mine, eh 1 you canary-colored teacher of infants." I hlushed modestly, and drew my shawl tightly over my yellow liannel nightgown. " You love me, Mary Jane, — don't deny it ! This tremhling shows it I" He drew me closely toward him, and said, with his deej) voice tenderly modulated : — " How's her pooty tootens, — did she get her 'ittle tootens wet, — bess her V* > I understood his allusion to my feet. I glanced down and saw that in my hurry I had i)ut on a pair of his old india-rubbers. My feet were not small or pretty, and the addition did not add to their beauty. "Let me go, sir," I remarked quietly. "This is entirely improper ; it sets a bad example for your child." And I firmly but gently extricated myself \ MISH MIX. 113 ^o hun, of iny ^ ? you tightly »y it/ ndevly t her meed oil a not i to is is ^our self from liis graaj). T approuchcxl tlio door. He seemed for a luoniciit buried in deep thought. " You say tliia was a negress^" " Yes, sir." "Humph, No. 1, I suppose?" " Who is Number One, sir ?" " My Jli'fft" he remarked, with a significant and sarcastic smile. Then, relapsing into his old man. ner, he threw his boots at my head, and bade mo begone. I withdrew calmly. CHAPTER V. My pupil was a bright little girl, who spoke French Avith a perfect accent. Her mother had been a French ])allet-dancer, which probably ac- counted for it. Although she was only six years old, it was easy to perceive she had been several times in love. She once said to me : — " Miss Mix, did you ever have the r/rande pas- sion? Did you ever feel a fluttering here?" and she placed her hand upon her small chest, and sighed quaintly, " a kind of dislj^ste for bonbons and caromels, when the world seemed as tasteless and hollow as a broken cordial drop." HI IflBR MIX. " Tln'ii yoii have felt it, Ninn V 1 said quietly. " () {hnr, yes. There wa.s Buttons, — that was our i)age, you know, — I loved liini dearly, hut i»a])a went hiui away. Then there was Dick, the groom, hut ho laughed at me, and I Huflered misery !" and nhe struck a tragic French attitude. " There is to ho company here to-morrow," she ailded, rattling on with childish naivete, "and papa's sweetheart — Blanche Marabout —is to be here. You know they say she is to bo my mamma." What thrill was this shot through me 1 But I rose calmly, and, administering a slight correction to the child, left the apartment. Blunderbore House, for the next week, was the scene of gayoty and merriment. That portion of the mansion closed with a grating was walled up, and the midnight shrieks no longer troubled me. But I felt more keenly the degradation of my situation. I was obliged to help Lady Blanche at her toilet and help her to look beautiful. For what 1 To captivate him 1 — no, no, — but why this sudden thrill and faintness? Did ho really love her 1 I had seen him pinch and swear at her. But I reflected JJiat he had thrown a candlestick at my head, and my foolish heart was reassured. It was a night of festivity, when a sudden mes- ■if-V I. MI8S MIX. 115 iiictJy. thut wa.s but j){i|)a y .'" aiKl »ere is to iiiiig oil tlieart — ow they Jiut I erection yas the itiori of IJed up^ mo. of my iiche at For t why really it her. ick at mes- sage obliged ^h'. Rawjestor to leave hia guests for a few hours. " Make yourselves merry, idiots," ho added, under his breath, Jis he passed mc. The door closed and he was gone. An half-hour passed. In the midst of the dan- cing a shriek was hoard, and out of the swaying croud of fainting women and excited men a wild figure strode into the room. One glance showed it to be a highwayman, heavily armed, hohling a pistol in each hand. " Let no one pass out of this room !" he said, in a voice of thunder. " The house is surrounded and you cannot escape. The first one who crosses yon- der threshold will bo shot like a dog. Gentlemen, I'll trouble you to approach in single file, and hand me your purses and watches." Finding resistance useless, the order was ungra- ciously obeyed. " Now, ladies, please to pass up your jewellery and trinkets." This order was still more ungraciously complied with. As Blanche handed to the bandit captain her bracelet, she endeavored to conceal a diamond necklace, the gift of Mr. Rawjester, in her bosom. But, with a demoniac grin, the powerful brute tore it from its concealment, and, administering a hearty box on the ear of the young girl, flung her aside. pi P c B'i tt Mil'' Ki'! H'i'i B'- ■ 1; Hi 1- f :■ . MISS MIX. It was now my turn. With a boating heart I made my way to the robber chieftain, and sank at liis f(>et. "O sir,,! am nothing but a jioor gover- ness, pray let me go." " O lio ! A governess 1 Give me your last month's wages, then. (Uve me Avhat you have stolen from your master !" and he laughed fiend. ishly. I gOLod at hi 111 quietly, and said, in a low voice : " I have stolen nothin.g from you, Mr. Eawjester!" " Ah, discovered ! Hush ! listen, girl !" he hissed, in a fiercer Avhisper, " utter a syllable to frustrate my plans and you die ; aid me, and — " But he was gone. In a few moments the party, with the exception of myself, were gagged and locked in the cellar. The next moment torches were applied to the rich hangings, and the house was in flames. I felt a strong hand seize me, and bear me out into the oj^jen air and place me iij^on the hillside, where I could overlook the burning mansion. It was Mr. Eaw- jester. " Burn !" he said, as he shook his fist at the flames. Then sinking on his knees before me, he said hurriedly : — " Mary Jane, I love you ; the obstacles to our J\ u ^ 'I'- f*i|i MISS MIX. 117 union arc or will bo soon removed. In yonder mansion wore confined my tlivoe crazy wives. One of them, as you know, attempted to kill me ! 11a ! tliis is vengoanee ! But will you be rfiine 1" I fell, Avitliout a word, upon his neck. 'in '■ H -»1 r OUY HEAVYSTONE; OR, (I ENTIEE ,•« >* A HU8CVLAR NOTEL. BY THE AUTHOR OF " SWORD AND GUN." CHAPTEK I. " Nerei repandiroBtnim incarvicervicum pcciis." A DINGY, swasliy, splashy afternoon in October ; a school-yard filled ^v.ith a mob of riotous boys. A lot of us standing outside. Suddenly came a dull, crashing sound from tlie school-room. At the ominous interruption I shud- dered involuntarily, and called to 8mithsye : — " What's up, Smithums ?" " Guy's cleaning out the fourth form," he replieJ. At the same moment George do Coverly passed me, holding his nose, from whence the bright Nor >. GUY HBAVYSTONE. 119 man blood streamed redly. To liim ilic |>lcbeian Smitlisye laugliingly : — <( Cully ! how's liis nibs V I pushed the door of the school-room o])eu. There are some spectacles which a uiaii never forgets. The burning' of Troy probably seemed a large-sized conflagration to the pious yEneas, and made an impression on liim which he carried away mth the feeble Anchises. In the centre of the room, lightly Ijrandishing the piston-rod of a steam-engine, stood Guy Heavy- stone alone. I sa^ alone, for the pile of small boys on the floor in the corner could hardly be called company. I will try and sketch him for the reader. Guy Heavystone was then only fifteen. His broad, deep chest, his sinewy and quivering flank, his straight pastern, showed him to be a thorouglibred. Perhaps he was a trifle heavy in llie fetlock, but he held his head haughtily erect. His eyes were glit- tering but pitiless. There was a sternness about the lower part of his face, — the old Heavystone look, — a sternness, heightened, perhaps, by the snaftle-bit which, in one of his strange freaks, he wore in his mouth to curb his occasional ferocity. Hie dress was well adapted to his square-set and ■Ui' il m li ■''1 '■'] 1^ ■; i- • 'i 120 (JUV IIEAVYSTONE. Jici'ciilcan fmmo. A striped knit undershirt, cJosc- litting striped tiglits, and a few spangles set off his figure ; a neat Glengarry cap adorned hi? head. On it was displayed the Hcavystone crest, a cock reao.t'dant on a dunghill or, and the motto, " Devil abetter!" I thought of Horatius on the l)ridge, of Hector before the walls. I ahvays make it a point to tliink of sometliing classical at such times. lie saw nie, and his sternness partly relaxed. ^Something like a smile struggled through his grim lineaments. It was like looking /)n the Jungfi'au after having seen Mont JJlanc, — a trifle, only a trifle less sublime and awful. Resting liis hand lightly on the shoulder of the head-master, Avho shuddered and collapsed under his touch, he strode toward me. His walk was peculiar. You could not call it a stride. It was like the "crest-tossing Bellerophon," — a kind of prancing gait. Guy Ileavystonc pranced toward nie, luul cha Vi X\' ill' >' •:*. , GUY IIEAVYWTUNE. 121 CHAPTEH ir. " Lord Lovel ho stood at tlie garden gate, A-combing his tnilk-wliito steed." It wns ill the Avinter oi 18G- wlion T next met Criiy Heavystonc. He had left the University and had entered tlie TGtli " Heavies." " I have ex- changed the gown for the sword, you see," he said, grasping my hand, and fracturing the bones of my little tinger, as he shook it. I gazed at him with unmixed admiration. He was squaror, sterner, and in every Avay smarter and more remarkable than ever. I began to feel toward this man as Phalaster felt towards Phyrgino, as somebody must have felt toward Arcliididasculus, as Boswell felt toward Johnson. " Come into my den," he said, and lifting me gently by the seat of my pantaloons he carried me up stairs and deposited me, before 1 could apologize, on the sofa. I looked around the room. It was a bachelor's apartment, characteristically furnished in the taste of the proprietor. A few claymores and battle-axes were ranged against the wall, and a cul- verin, captured by 8iv Kalph Heavystone, occupied the corner, the other end of the room being taken '■ ' I' f". M 122 GUY HEAVYSTONE. - |H [ - i^^Hi il , ! ■'" '^^H ii m 1 1" *' '*- i J ^ ■ ■! ■ ii .{ Ij up by a light battery. Foils, boxing-gloves, saddles, and iishing-poles lay around carelessly. A small pile of billets-doux lay upon a silver salver. The man was not an anchorite, nor yet a 8ir Galahad. I never could tell what Guy thought of women. " Poor little beasts," he would often say when the conversation turned on any of his fresh conquests. Then, passing his hand over his marble brow, the old look of stern fixedness of purpose and unflinch- ing severity would straighten the lines of his mouth, and he Avould mutter, half to himself, " S'death !" " Come with, me to Heavystone Grange. The Exmoor Hounds throw off to-morrow. I'll give you a mount," he said, as he amused himself by rolling up a silver candlestick between his fingers. " You shall have Cleopatra. But stay," he added thoughtfully ; " now I remember, I ordered Cleo- patra to be shot this morning." " And why T I queried. " She threw her rider yesterday and feU on him—" "And killed him r " Ko. That's the reason why I have ordered her to be shot. I keep no animals that are not danger- ous — I should add — deadly !" He hissed the last GUY HEAVYSTONE. 123 septence between his teeth, and a gloomy frown descended over his calm brow. I affected to turn over the tradesman's bills that lay on the table, for, like all of the Heavystone race. Guy seldom paid cash, and said : — " You remind me of the time when Leonidas — " " 0, bother Leonidas and your classical allusions. Come !" We descended to dinner. CHAPTER III. " He carries weight, he rides a race, 'Tis for a thousand pound." " There is Flora Billingsgate, the greatest co- quette and hardest rider in the country," said my compenion, Ralph Mortmain, as we stood upon Dingleby Common before the meet. I looked up and beheld Guy Heavystone bending haughtily over the saddle, as he addressed a beauti- ful brunette. She was indeed a splendidly groomed and high-spirited woman. We were near enough to overhear the following conversation, which any high-toned reader will recognize as the common and natural expression of the higher classes. m m Irf 1 ;::)»:' ■i;M •■T'i!''r' f' ■ ii'i ■ r 1.1 ,^i' I- !!#lr'i I.; • 124 GUY HEAVYSTONE. "When Diana takes tlio field the cliasc is not wholly confined to objects /nyoi vfffirra-,'' said Guy^ darting a .significant glanc(^. at his companion. Flora did not shrink eitlier IVoiii the glance or the meaning implied in the sarcasisi. " If 1 were looking for an Endymion, now — " she said archly, as she playfully cantered over a few hounds and leaped a five-barred gate. Guy whispered a few words, inaudible to the rest of the party, and, curvetting slightly, cleverly cleared two of the huntsmen in a flying leaj), gal- oped up the front steps of the mansion, and dashing at full speed through the hall leaped through the drawing-room window and rejoined me, languidly on the lawn. " Be careful of Flora Billingsgate," he said to me, in low stern tones, while his pitiless eye shot a baleful fire. " Gardez vous /" " Gnothi seauton," I replied calmly, not wishing to appear to be behind him in perception or verbal felicity. Guy started off in high spirits. He was well carried. He and the first whip, a ten-stone man, were head and head at the last fence, while the hounds were rolling over their fox a hundred yards iixrther in the open. V t flUy IIEAVYSTONE. 125 But iiii iiuoxpt'ctiul (;ircumHtiinco occiu'iumI. Com- ing' Ixick, his clicstuut muo I'cfir-^ed a tuii-lbot wall. Slu) reared and fell haekward. Again ho lud her up to it lightly; again slus refused, falling heavily from the coping, (luy started to his fecit. The old pitiless fire shone in his eyes ; the old stern look setthid around his mouth. Seizing tho mare hy the tail and mane he th^(.!^v her over the wall. Slie landed twentv feet on the other side, erect Jind trembling. Lightly leaping the same obstacle him- self, he remounted her. She did not refuse tho wall the next time. m CHAPTER IV. " He holds him by his glittering eye." Guy was in tho North of Ireland, cock-shooting. So IJalph Mortmain told me, and also that tho match between ISLiry in'andagec and (Juy had been broken off by Flora Ijillingsgatt;. " I don't like those Billingsgates," said lialph, " tliey'ro a bad stock. Her father. Smith fiekl do Billingsgate, had an unpleasant way of turning up the knave from the bottom of the pack. But nous vcrrons ; let us go and sec Guy. m ^ ;;.!!. !' :. * I: l\ I ( , i ; I '1 ■ 120 (lUY IIEAVYSTONK. 'I'lic next laorning wo started for Fin-ina-(Jour.s (vrossing. Wlion 1 readied tlie sliootiiig-hox, whore (luy was entertaining a select company of friond.s, Flora Billingsgate greeted nie with a saucy smile. Guy was even Hijuarei jind sterner than over. His gusts of passion were more frequent, and it was with diificulty that lie (,'ould keep an able-bodied servant in his family. His present retainers wore more or ''!ss maimed from exposure to the fury of their master. There was a strange cynicism, a catting sarcasm in his address, piercing through his polished manner. I thought of Timon, etc., etc. One evening, we were sitting over our Chamoer- tin, after a hard day's work, and Guy was listlessly turning over some letters, when suddenly he ut- tered a cry. Did you ever hear the trumpeting of a wounded eleidiant 1 It Avas like that. I looked at him with consternation. He was glancing at a letter which he held at arm's length, and snorting, as it were, at it as he gazed. The lower part of his face was stern, but not as rigid as usual. He was slowly grinding between his teeth the fragments of the glass he had just been drinking from. Sudd(uily he seized one of his servants, and, forcing the wretch upon his knees, exclaimed, with the roar of a tiger : — GUY IIEAVYSTONE. 127 " Dog ! why was this kopt from iiic 1" " "VVliy, please, sir, Miss Flora said us how it was a reconciliation I'roni Miss IJranda^'eo, and it was to he kei>t from yon where you wuuld not he likely lo see it, — and — and — " " Speak, day; ! and you — " "I put it among your bills, air!" With a groan, like distant thunder, Guy fell swooning to the lloor. He soon recovered, for the next moment a ser- vant came rushing into the room with the informa- tion that a number of the ingenuous peasantry of the neighborhood were about to indidg(; that even- ing in the national pastime of burning a farm-house and shooting a landlord, (xuy smiled a fearful smile, without, however, altering hi;-i stern and pitiless expression. " Let them come," he said calmly ; " I feel like entertaining company." We barricaded the doors and windows, and then chose our arms from the armory. Guy's choice was a singular one : it was a landing net with a long handle, and a sharp cavalry sabi'e. We wore not destined to remain long in igno- rance of its use. A howl was heard from without, and a party of fifty or sixty armed men })recipitated themselves against the door. .m ■ : I 128 dUY IIKAVYSToNK. ^P: if i • Suddenly lln' Avindov- oponod. With tho i'iii>id- iiy of lij^lilniii.ij:, (Juy irciivystoiio cast the not ovov tlu> head ol' tli(^ vin^;k'ad('i', ejai'-uliited " Uuhif .''* and with a hack stnikt! of Ih'm cavalry sahio suv- L'l'cd tlic uiciiilx'i' IVoiii ij-! trunk, and, dra\vin«^' tlie ncit ])a(:k aL;ain, cast tlic •^ovy licad n])on the Hour, wiyin^' qr.ii'tly :~ " One." Again the net was ca^t, the .steel llasliod, the net was withdrawn, and an ominous "Two!" accom- panied the head as it roljed on the lioor. " Do you romcmhei- "what Pliny says of the gla- diator T said (>ny, cahuly wiping liis ahre. "llow grajjluc is that passage conniienein^* ' Liter vo.s\ etc.'" 1'he sport continued until the heads oi" twenty desperadoes had heen gathered in. The rest seemed inclined to dis[)erse. (Juy incautiously showed himself at the door ; a ringing shot was heard, and he staggered hack, pierced through the heart. Grasping the door-post in the last uncon- scious throes of his mighty frame, the whole side of the house yielded to that earthquake tremor, and wo had Ijarely time to escape before the whole building fell iji ruins. I thought of (Samson, the Giant Judge, etc., etc. ; l)ut all was over. Guy lieavystone had died as he had lived, — hard. MR. MIDSHIPMAN HRKEZY. A KAVAi: OKI'ICKI!. ill Bv (JAITAIX ]\[--l{]iY--'i\ \l. N. CIIAPTEli I. My Mlicr was a noitli-coimliy snr<:,'0()]). He had retired, a "widower, from her j\Iajesty\s navy many years l)cfore, and had a small praotiei' in liis native village. When I was seven years old he em[tloyed me to carry medicines to his patients. Being of a lively disposition, I sometimes amnsed myself, dur- ing my daily rounds, hy mixing the contents of the different pliials. Although I had no reason to douht that the general result of this practice was bonelicial, yet, as the deatli of a consumptive curate followed the addition of a strong mercurial lotion to his expectorant, my father concluded to withdraw me from the profession and send me to school. I i k, 130 MR. MIDSHIPMAN BREEZY. (frulDhins, the schoolniastGr, was a tyrant, and it was not long before my inipetuoiis and self-willed nature rebelled against liis authority. I soon be- gan to form plans of revenge. In this I was iis- sisted by Tom Snaffle, — a schoolfellow. One day Tom suggested : — " Suppose we blow him up. I've got two pounds of powder !" " Xo, that's too noisy," I replied. Tom was silent for a minute, and again spoke : — " You remember how vou flattened out the curate, PiUs ! Couldn't you give Grubbins some- thing — something to make him leathery sick — ehr A flash of inspiration crossed my mind. I went to the shop of the village apothecary. He knew me ; I had often purchased vitriol, which I poured into Grubbins's inkstand to corrode his pens and burn up his coat-tail, on which he was in the habit of wiping them. I boldly asked for an ounce of chloroform. The young apothecary winked and handed me the bottle. It was Grubbins's custom to throw his handker- chief over his head, recline in his chair and take a short nap during recess. Watching my opportu- nity, as he dozed, I managed to slip his handkor- i I -I* T .'I ^ ti |1 (11 fli ri .:-; . i. - lii MR. MIDSHIPMAN BREEZY. 131 chief from his face and substitute my own, moist- ened with chloroform. In a few minutes lie was insensible! Tom and I then quickly shaved his head, beard, and eyebrows, l)lackened his face with a mixture of vitriol and burnt cork, and tied. There was a row and scandal the next day. My father always excused me by asserting that C}rulv biMS had got drunk, — but somehow found it conve- nient to procure me an appointment in her Majesty's navy at an early day. CHAPTER II. An official letter, with the Admiralty seal, in- formed me that I was expected to join H. M. ship Belcher, Captain Boltrope, at Portsmouth, without delay. In a few days I presented myself to a tall, stern-visaged man, who was slowly pacing the lee- ward side of the quarter-deck. As I touched my hat he eyed me sternly : — " So, ho ! Another young suckling. The service is going to the devil. !N"othing but babes in the cockpit and grannies in the board. Boatswain's mate, pass the word for Mr. Cheek !" Mr. Cheek, the steward, appeared and touched i'r- wni, t ' f ,l; ■ ; ii y-i •I ' ' i f > III *■« - E. 'i ^•1 t )• 132 MR. MIDSHIPMAN BKEEZY, liis hat. " Tntroduco Mr. Breezy to tlio youiin gentleincn. 8top ! Where's Mr. Swizzle ?" " At the masthead, sir." " Where's Mr. Lankey ^" " At the masthead, sir." " Mr. Briggs V " IMasthead, too, sir." " Ami the rest of the young gentlemen ?" roared the enraged officer. " All masthead, sir." "Ah !" said Captain Boltrope, as lie smiled grindy, " under the circumstances, j\Ii. Breezy, you had better go to the masthead too." CHAPTEE III. At the masthead I made the acquaintance of two youngsters of about my own ago, one of whom informed me tliat lie had been there three hundred and thirty-two days out of the year. " In rough weather, when the old cock is out of sorts, you know, we never come down," added a young gentleman of nine years, with a dirk nearly as long as himself, who had been introduced to me as Mr. Briggs. " By the w^ay, Pills," he continued. MR. MIDSHIPMAN BUEE2Y. 133 " how did you come to omit giving the ctiiiiain a naval salute V " Why, I touched my hat," I said, innocently. " Yes, but that isn't enough, you know. Tliat will do very well at other times. Hd expects the naval salute when you first come on board — greeny!" I began to feel alarmed, and begged him to explain. "Why, you see, after touching your hat, you should have touched him lightly with your fore- finger in his waistcoat, so, and asked, * How's his nibs V — you see V " Ho\\ his nibsl" I repeated. " Exactly. He would have drawn back a little, and then you should have repeated the salute, remarking, * How's his royal nibsl' asking cau- tiously &.rter his wife and family, and requesting to be introduced to the gunner's daughter." " The gunner's daughter V " The same ; you know she takes care of us young gentlemen ; now don't forget, Pillsy 1" When we were called down to the deck, I thought it a good chance to profit by this instruc- tion. I approached Captain Boltrope and repeated the salute without conscientiously omitting a single 4 10. I i .' .1' 134 Mli. MIDSHIPMAN BREEZY. detail. He remained for a moment, livid and speechless. At length he gasped out : — " Boatswain's mate !" " If you please sir," I asked, tremidously, " I should like to he introduced to the gunner's daughter !" " 0, very good, sir !" screamed Captain Boltropc, rubbing his hands and absolutely capering about the deck with rage. " tl — n you ! Of course you shall ! ho ! the gunner's daughter ! 0, h — 11 ! this is too much ! Boatswain's mate V Before I well knew where I was, I was seized, borne to an eight-pounder, tied upon it and flogged ! '■> )' M^ 1 iv n f\ - CHAPTER IV. As we sat together in the cockpit, picking the weevils out of our biscuit, Briggs consoled me for my late mishap, adding that the " naval salute," as a custom, seemed just then to be honored more in the . bi'each than the observance. I joined in the hilarity occasioned by the witticism, and in a few moments we were all friends. Presently Swizz'e turned to me : — " We have just been planning how to confiscate a keg of claret, wliich Nips, the purser, keeps under mi. MIDSHIPMAN BEEEZY. 135 Ilia bunk. The old nipchceso lies there drunk half tlic day, and there's no getting at it." " Let's go beneath the state-room and bore through the deck, and so tap it," said Lankoy. The proposition was received with a shout of applause. A long half-inch auger and bit was procured from Chips, the carpenter's mate, and Swizzle, after a careful examination of the timbers beneath the ward-room, commenced operations. The auger at last disappeared, when suddenly there was a slight disturbance on the deck above. Swizzle withdrew the auger hurriedly ; from its point a few bright red drops trickled. " Huzza ! send her up again !" cried Lankey. The auger was again applied. This time a shriek was heard from the purser's cabin. Instantly the light was doused, and the party retreated hurriedly to the cockpit. A sound of snoring was heard as the sentry stuck his head into the door. " All right, sir," he replied in answer to the voice of the officer of the deck. The next morning we heard that Nips was in the surgeon's hands, Avith a bad wound in the fleshy part of his leg, and that the auger had not struck claret. .!-' m > 4''' if '• fn i ; -fi. .1 It, •; h 'M. 130 MR. MIDSHIPMAN BREEZY. CHAPTER V. " Now, Pills, you'll havo a chance to smell pow- der," said Briggs as he entered the cockpit and buckled around his waist an enormous cutlass. " We have just sighted a French ship." We \vent on deck. Captain Boltrope grinned as we touched our hats. He hat(d the purser. " Come, young gentlemen, if you're boring for French claret, yonder's a good quality. Mind your con, sir," he added, turning to the quartermaster, who was grinning. The ship was already cleared for action. The men, in their eagerness, had started the coffee from the tubs and filled them with shot. Presently the Frenchman yawed, and a shot from a long thirty- two came skipping over the water. It killed the quartermaster and took off both of Lankey's legs. " Tell the purser oui account is squared," said the dying boy, with a feeble smile. The fight raged fiercely for two hours. I remem- ber killing the French Admiral, as we boarded, but on looking around for Briggs, after the smoke had cleared away, I was intensely amused at witnessing the following novel sight : — i. Briggs had pinned the French captain against 1:1'*; MR. MID.SIIIPMxVN BREEZY. 137 the mast with his cutlass, and was now engaged, with all the hilarity nf youth, in pulling the cap- tain's coat-tails hetween his legs, in imitation of a dancing-jack. As the Frenchmen lifted his legs and arms, at each jerk of Briggs's, I could not help participating in the general mirth. " You young devil, what are you doing ?" said a stifled voice behind me. I looked up and beheld Captain Boltrope, endeavoring to calm his stern features, but the twitching around his mouth be- trayed his intense enjoyment of the scene. "Go to the masthead — up with you, sir !" he repeated sternly to Briggs. " Very good, sir," said the boy, coolly preparing to mount the shrouds. " Good by, Johnny Cra- paud. Humph !" he added, in a tone intended for my ear, " a pretty way to treat a hero. The service is going to the devil !" I thought so too. CHAPTER VI. We were ordered to the "West Indies. Although Captain Boltrope's manner toward me was still severe, and even harsh, I understood that my name had been favorably mentioned in the despatches. m 138 MR. MIDSHIPMAN BIIEEZY. %■■ ]' ii". iImIH Eeader, was you over at Jamaica 1 If so, you romomboi' tlic nogrosses, tho oranges, Port Royal Tom — the yollow fever. After being two Aveeks at tlie station, I was taken sick of the fever. In a month I was delirious. During my paroxysms, T had a wild distempered dream of a stern face bend- ing anxiously over my pillow, a rough hand smooth- ing my hair, and a kind voice saying : — "i3oss his 'ittle heart! Did he have the naughty fever?" This face seemed again changed to tho well-known stern features of Captain Boltropc. When I was convalescent, a packet edged in black was juit in my hand. It contained, the news of my father's death, and a sealed letter which he had requested to be given to me on his decease. I opened it tremblingly. It read thus : — My dear Boy : — I regret to inform you that in all pro- bability you are not my son. Your mother, I am grieved to say, was a highly improper person. Who your father may be, I really cannot say, but perhaps tho Honorable Henry Boltrope, Captain 11. N., may be able to inform you. Circumstances over which I have no control have (leferred this important di.sclosure. " Your Stricken Parent," And BO Captain Bol trope was my father. Heav- ens ! Was it a dream ? I recalled his stern man- ner, his observant eye. his ill-concealed uneasiness M \ti'. V MR. MIDSHIPMAN BREEZY. 139 when in my presence. I longed to embrace him. Staggering to my feet, I rusiied in my scanty apparel to the deck, where Captain Boltrope was just then engaged in receiving the Governor's wife and daughter. The ladies shrieked ; the youngest, a beautiful girl, blushed deeply. Hooding them not, I sank at his feet, and, embracing them, cried : — "My father!" " Chuck him overboard ! " roared Captain 3>olt- ropo. " Stay," pleaded the soft voice of Clara Maitland, the Governor's daughter. " Shave his head ! he's a wretched lunatic ! " continued Captain Boltrope, while his voice trem- bled with excitement. " No, let me nurse and take care of him," said the lovely girl, blushing as she spoke. " Mamma, can't we take him home ? " The daughter's pleading was not without effect. In the meantime I had fainted. When I recovered my senses I found myself in Governor Maitland's mansion. uo MR. MIDSHIPMAN BREEZY. CHAPTER VII. \ i The reader will gucBs what followed. I fell deeply in love with Clara Maitland, to whom I confided the aecret of my hirth. The generous girl asserted that she had detected the superiority of my manner at once. We plighted our trotli, and resolved to wait upon events. Briggs called to see me a few days afterward. He said that the purser had insulted the whole cockpit, and all the midshipmen had called him out. But he added thoughtfully : ** I don't see how we can arrange the duel. You see there are six of us to light him." ' *' Very easily," I replied. " Let your fellows all stand in a row, and take his fire ; that, you see, gives him six chances to one, and he must be a bad shot if he can't hit one of you ; while, on the other hand, you see, he gets a volley from you six, and one of you '11 be certain to fetch him." "Exactly;" and away Briggs went, but soon returned to say that the purser had declined, — " like a d — d coward," he added. But the news of the sudden and serious illness 1 1 MR. MIDSHIPMAN DREEZY. 141 of Captain Bolti cpc put ott' tlio duel. I hastened to his bedside, but too late, — an hour previous ho had given up the ghost. I resolved to return to England. I made known the secret of my birtli, and exhibited my adopted father's letter to Lady Maitland, who at once suggested my marriage with her daughter, before I returned to claim the property. Wo were married, and took our departure next day. I made no delay in posting at once, in company with my wife and my friend Briggs, to my native village. Judge of my horror and surprise when my late adopted father came out of his shop to welcome me. " Then you are not dead ! " I gasped. " No, my dear boy." " And this letter ? " My father — as I must still call him — glanced on the paper, and pronounced it a forgery. Briggs roared with laughter. I turned to him and demanded an explanation. a Why, don't you see. Greeny, it's all a joke, — a midshipman's joke ! " " But—" I asked. " Don't be a fool. You've got a good wife, — be satisfied." I turned to Clara, and was satisfied. Although m m Hi,; 112 .MH. MTOHIIIPMAN nREEZY. Mrs. Miiitluiul never for^javo mo, the jolly old (loveriioj" laughed heartily over the joke, uiid so well used his influence that I soon became, dear reader. Admiral Breezy, K.CJi. JOHN JEMINIS. •j:* OR. THE SMOKER REFORMED. BY T. S. A— Tir— 1?. CHAPTER I. << One cigar a day !" said Judge Boompointer, "One cigar a day I" repeated John Jenkins, as with trepidation he dropped liis half-consumed cigar under his work-bench. " One cigar a day is three cents a day," re- marked Judge Boompointer, gravely ; " and do you know, sir, what one cigar a day, or three cents a day, amounts to in the course of four years ?" John Jenkins, in his boj'hood, had attended the village school, and possessed considerable arithmetical ability. Taking up a shingle which lay upon his work-bench, and producing a piece Mil - 1 1^^ •' W N I -t'», i':,\": ti> u 144 JOHN JENKINS. of chalk, with a feeling of conscious pride, he made an exhaustive calculation. " Exactly forty-three dollars and eighty cents," he replied, wiping the i)erspiration from his heated hrow, whilo his face flushed with honest enthusiasm. " Well, sir, if you saved three cents a day, instead of wasting it, you would now be the pos- sessor of a new suit of clothes, an illustrated Family Bible, a pew in the church, a complete set of Patent Office Reports, a hymn-book, and a paid subscription to Arthur^ Home Magazine, which could be purchased for exactly forty-three dollars and eighty cents; and," added the Judge, with increasing sternness, ** if you calculate leap- year, which you seem to have strangely omitted, you have three cents more, sir ; three cents more ! What would that buy you, sir ? " "A cigar," suggested John Jenkins; but, coloring again deeply, he hid his face. " No, sir," said the Judge, with a sweet smile of benevolence stealing over his stern features ; ** properly invested, it would buy you that which passeth all price. Dro^jped into the missionary- box, who can tell what heathen, now idly and joyously wantoning in nakedness and sin, might be brought to a sense of his miserable condition. fit JOHN JENKINS. 145 he Its," his lest and made, through that three cents, to feel the torments of the wicked ?" With these words the Judge retired, 1 saving John Jenkins buried in profound thought. ** Three cents a day," he muttered. " In forty years I might be worth four hundred and thirty-eight dollars and ten cents, — and then I might marry Mary. Ah, Mary I " The young carpenter sighed, and, drawing a twenty-five cent daguerreotype from his vest pocket, gazed long and fervidly upon the features of a young girl in book muslin and a coral necklace. Then, with a resolute expression, he carefully locked the door of his workshop and departed. Alas ! his good resolutions were too late. We trifle with the tide of fortune which too often nips us in the bud, and casts the dark shadow of misfortune over the bright lexicon of youth ! That night the half-consumed fragment of John Jenkins's cigar set fire to his workshop and burned it up, together with all his tools and materials. There was no insurance. v:C .1 m II JOHN JENKIN8. the' <] $i I'' ; i| ll 150 .lOlIN JENKINS. .; 1 bade them smoke. ''It's better than Ijread !" hiughed the wretch boarsely. Mary Jeiikhis, though of a patient nature, felt it her duty now to speak. "I have borne much, John Jenkins," she said. " But I prefer that tlie children should not smoke. It is an unclean habit, and soils their clothes. I ask this as a special favor !" John Jenkins hesitated, — the pangs of remorse began to seize him. "Promise me this, John !" urged Mary upon her knees. *'I promise !" reluctantly answered John. '' And you will put the money in a savings- bank?" " I will," repeated her husband ; " and /'ll ujive up smoking, too. "'Tis well, John Jenkins !" said Judw Boom- pointer, appearing suddenly from behind the door, where he liad been concealed during the inicnwiew. "NoMysaid! my man. Cheer uj) ! I will sec that the children are decently buried." The husband and wife fell into each other's arms. And Judge Boompointer, gazing upon the aftect- ing spectacle, burst into tears. From that day John Jenkins was an altered man. i ■HMiii ^0 TITLE. BY W~IiK— E C— Lli— NS. PROLOGUE. The following advertisement appeared in tlio " Times " of the 17tli of June,, 1845 :— w ANTED. — A few young men for a light gen- teel employment. Address J.W-P.O. In the same paper, of same date, in another column : — TOLET. — That commodious and elegant family mansion, No. 27 Liraehouse Koad, Pultneyville, will be rented low to a respectable tenant if applied for immediately, the family being about to remove to the continent. Under the local intelligence, iu another col- umn : — Missing. — An unknown elderly gentleman a week ago left his lodgings in the Kent Road, since which I m ijl 152 NO TITLE. JIIM I nothing has been hear I of him. He left no trace of his identity except a portmanteau containing a couple of shirts marked " 209, Ward." To find the connection between the mysterious disappearance of the elderly gentleman and tlie anonymous communication, the relevancy of both these incidents to the letting of a commodious family mansion, cand the dead secret involved in the three occurrences, is the task of the writer of this history. A slim young man with spectacles, a large hat, drab gaiters, and a note-book, sat late that night with a copy of the '* Times " before him, and a pencil which he rattled nervously between his teeth in the cofi'eo-room of the " Blue Dragon." h ' CHAPTER I. MARY JONE's narrative. I AM upper housemaid to the family that lived at No. 27 Limehouse Road, Pultneyville. I have been requested by Mr. Wilkey CoUiugs, which I takes the liberty of hero stating is a gentleman born and bred, and has some consideration for the feehngs of servants, and is not above reward- kt no trace of fning a couple NO TITLE. 153 aJai'gehat, e that night Miim, and a petween his ' I>i-agon." that Jivi'd G. I have gs, which I gentleman I'ation for ve reward- ing them for their trouble, which is more than you can say for some who asks questions and gets short answers enough, gracious knows, to tell what I know about them. I have been requested to tell my story in my own langwidge, though, being no schoUard, mind cannot conceive. I think my master is a brute. Do not know that ho has ever attempted to poison my missus, — which is too good for him, and how she ever came to marry him, heart only can tell, — but believe him to be capable of any such hatrosity. Have heard him swear dreadful because of not having his shaving-water at nine o'clock i3recisely. Do not know whether he ever forged a will or tried to get my missus' property, alltough, not having con- fidence in the man, should not be surprised if he had done so. Believe that there was always some- thing mysterious in his conduct. Kemember dis- tinctly how the family left home to go abroad. Was putting up my back hair, last Saturday morning, when I heard a ring. Says cook, " That's missus' bell, and mind you hurry or the master 'ill know why." Says I, *' Humbly thank- ing you, mem, but taking advice of them as is competent to give it, I'll take my time." Found missus dressing herself and master growling as usual. Says missus, quite calm and easy like, m m , -'J ,:'V 154 NO TITLE. il'V III It'; ?.■; (11 »■ I' " Mary, we begin to pack to-day." '• What for mem?" says I, taken aback.. ''What's tliat hussy asking? " says master from the bedclothes quite savage like. " For the continent — Italy,'* says missus — " Can you go Mary ? " Her voice was quite gentle and saintlike, but I knew the struggle it cost, and says I, "With i/ou mem, to India's torrid clime, if required, but with African Gorillas," says I, looking toward the bed, '• never." " Leave the room," says master, start- ing up and catching of his bootjack. *' Why Charles! " says missus, *' how you talk ! " affect- ing surprise. " Do go Mary," says she, slipping a half-crown into my hand. I left the room scorning to take notice of the odious wretch's conduct. Cannot say whether my master and missus were ever legally married, What with the dread- ful state of morals nowadays and them stories in the circulating liberaries, innocent girls don't know into what society they might be obliged to take situations. Never saw missus' marriage certificate, though I have quite accidental-like looked in her desk when open, and would have seen it. Do not know of any lovers missus might have had. Believe she had a liking for John Thomas, footman, for she was always spite- I AM b; the presi ways ha< been dis* uiysteric On the 1 office a bright a mind tl: read in portion repeati; NO TITLE. 155 ' What for, Vhat's tliat bedclothes lit— Italy/, Her voice liuew the ii mem, to 'ith African the bed, i«ter, start- k. '' Why k 1 " affect- ^e, slip2)iiig the room IS wretch's ^^ missus the dread- • stories in iris don't obliged to marriage tental-like "Id have s missus liking for lys spite- tiil-likc— poor lady — when wo wore together — though there were nothing between us, as Cook well knows and dare not deny, and missus need u'i have been jealous. Had never seen arsenic or Prussian acid in miy of the private drawers —but have seen paregoric and camphor. One of my master's friends was a Count Moscow, a Russian papist — which I detested. CHAPTER II. THE SLIM YOUNG MAn's STORY. I AM by profession a reporter, and writer for the press. I live at Pultneyville. I have al- ways had a passion for the marvellous, and have been distinguished for my facility in tracing out mysteries, and solving enigmatical occurrences. On the night of the 17th June, 1845, I left my office and walked homeward. The night was bright and starlight. I was revolving in my mind the words of a singular item I had just read in the '* Times." I had reached the darkest portion of the road, and found myself mechanically repeating : " An elderly gentleman a week ago .1. mm jfli^^^^^^^^^Bki*' I 156 NO TITLE. *;,(;»,;■" ' left his loclgiuga ou tlio Kent Road," wlicn m\- (lenly I heard a step behind mo. I turned quickly, with an expression of horror in my face, and by the light of the newly risen moon beheld an elderly gentleman, with green cot- ton umbrella, approaching me. His hair, which was snow white, was parted over a broad, open fore- head. The expression of his face, which was slightly flushed, was that of amiability verginf» almost upon imbecility. There was a strange, inquiring look about the widely opened mild blue eye, — a look that might have been intensified to insanity, or modified to idiocy. As he passed me, he paused and partly turned his face, with a gesture of inquiry. I see him still, his white locks blowing in the evening breeze, his hat a little on the back of his head, and his fingure painted in relief against the dark blue sky. Suddenly he turned his mild eye full upon me. A weak smile played about his thin lips. In a voice which had something of the tremulousness of age and the self-satisfied chuckle of imbecility in it, he asked, pointing to the rising moon, *' Why? —Hush ! " He had dodged behind me, and appeared to be looking anxiously down the road. I could feel his aged frame shaking with terror as he laid his t me iu ti^' " Hu8 lUste iug of ^^ eudeavo that iu pearcd o «' Wh; succeed( .«Wh '' \Vh ering ov iu the o'er hill a feebl in the stamm the tea openec I to a shad leadin "A louslj "I modi< m\ 1 m NO TITLE. 157 wJicii sua. *" of Iiorror ^^^vJj^ risen pigrecucot. ', which was open fore, [which was ^y verginr, a strange, f^miJdbJue tensified to ^e passed ice, with a his white his hat a is fingure sky. ponme. A In a voice usness of >eciJity in Why? (( red to be I could »r as he laid his thin hands upon my shoulders and faced me in the direction of the supposed danger. " Hush I did you not hear them coming ? " I Ustencd ; there was no sound but the sougii- iu" of the roadside trees in the evening wind. I endeavoured to reassure him, with such success that in a few moments the old weak smile ap- peared on his benevolent face. " Why ? — " But the look of interrogation was succeeded by a hopeless blankness. " Why ! " I repeated with assuring accents. " Why," he said, a gleam of intelligence flick- ering over his face, *' is yonder moon, as she sails in the blue empyrean, casting a flood of light o'er hill and dale, like — Why," he repeated, with a feeble smile, "is yonder moon as she sails in the blue empyrean — " He hesitated, — stammered — and gazed p^ me hopelessly, with the tears dripping from his moist and widely opened eyes. I took his hand kindly in my own. " Casting a shadow o'er hill and dale," I repeated quietly, leading him up the subject, " like — Come, now." " Ah !" he said, pressing my mand tremu- lously, " you know it ? " ** I do. Why is it like — the — eh- the com- modious mansion on the Limehouse Koad ? " f. 158 NO TITLE. m \ i :fBi!' ■H »■' A blank staro only followed. He shook his head sadly. •* Like the young men wantctiror a light, genteel employment ?" He \vaggcd his feeble old head cunningly. " Or, Mr. Ward," I said, with bold confidence, " like the mysterious disappearance from the Kent Pioad?" The moment was full of suspense He did not seem to hear me. Suddenly ho turned. *' Ha ! " I darted forward. But ho had vanished in the darkness* CHAPTER HI. NO, 27 LIMEIIOUSE KG AD. It was a hot midsummer evening. Limehouse Road was deserted save by dust and a few rattl- ing butchers' carts, and the bell of the mufl&n ami crumpet man. A commodious mansion, which stood on the right of the I'oad as you enter Pnlt- neyville, surrounded by stately poplars and a high fence surmounted by a clievaux de/n'se of broken glass, looked to the passing and footsore pedes. trian like the genius of seclusion and solitude. A bill announcing in the usual terms that the house vants' NO TITLE. 159 ^e «Iiook his ^ wanted or ^ >^^^ confidence ^<^<^ from the Ho did not ■ned, ""Shed in tlie ). I^imehoiise a few rattl- e muffin and ision, which ' enter Pult- s and a high ^ of broken soj'o j)cdes. »<1 solitude. IS that the house was to let, hung from the bell at the ser- vants' entrance. As the sliades of evening closed, and the hmg shadows of the jioplars stretched across the road, aman cjrrying a small kettle stopped and gazed, first at the bill and then at the house. "When he had reached the corner of the fence, he again stopped and looked cautiously np and down the road. Apparently satisfied with the result of his scrutiny, he deliberately sat himself down in the dark shadow of the fence, and at once busied him- self in some employment, so well concealed as to be invisible to the gaze of passers-by. At the end of an hour he retired cautiously. But not altogether unseen. A slim young man with spectacles and note-book, stepped from be- hind a tree as the retreating j&gure of the intrud- er was lost in the twilight, and transferred from the fence to his note-book the freshly stencilled inscription, "S—T— 1 800— X." i M 'i ;l 160 NO TITLE. CHAPTER IV. COUNT Moscow's NARHATIVE. fj'r 1 1 1 1 fi f 1 :. §j ' 'i ;*■■ ■' A ^ I AM a foreigner, Observe ! To be a foreign- er in England is to bo mysterious, suspicious, intriguing. M. Collins has requested the history of my complicity with certain occurrences. It is nothing, bah ! absolutely nothing. I write with ease and fluency. Why should I not write ? Tra la la ! I am what you English call corpulent. Ha, ha ! I am a pupil of Macchi- avelli. I find it much better to disbelieve everj'- thing, and to approach my subject and wishes circuitously, than in a direct manner. You have observed that playful animal, the cat. Call it, and it does not come to you directly, but rubs itself against all the furniture in the room, and reaches you finally — and scratches, Ah, ha, scratches ! I am one of the feline species. Peo- ple call me a villain — bah ! I know the family, livmg No. 2*7 Limehousc Road. I respect the gentleman, — a fine, burly specimen of your Englishman, — and madame, charming, ravishing, delightful. When it became known to me that they designed to let their de- NO TITLE. 161 >o a foreigj). suspicious, tl»e history Alices. It ig J'y sljoiild I 'Oil English 1 of ]\Iaechi. lieve evt'iy. ^nd wishes You havG t. Call it, y, but rubs i*oom, and Ah, ha, iies. Peo. jimehouso ne, burly madanio, it became their de- lightful residence, and visit foreign sliorcs, I at once called upon them. I kissed tlie hand of matlamc. I embraced the great Englishman. Madame blushed slightly. The great Englishman shook my hand like a mastiff I began in that dexterous, insinuating manner, of which I am truly proud. I thought madame was ill. Ah, no. A change, thtn, was all that was required. I sat down at the piano and sang. In a few minutes madame retired. I was alono with ray friend. Seizing his hand, I began with every demon- sti'ation of courteous sympathy. I do not repeat my words, for my intention was conveyed more in accent, emphasis, and manner, than speech. I hinted to him that he had another wife living. I suggested that this was balanced — ha ! — by his wife's lover. That, possibly, he wished to fly ; hence the letting of his delightful mansion. That he regularly and systematically beat his wife in the English manner, and that she repeatedly deceived me. I. talked of hope, of consolation, of remedy. I carelessly produced a bottle of strych- nine and a small vial of stramonium from my pocket, and enlarged on the efficiency of drugs. His face, which had gradually become convulsed, suddenly became fixed with a frightful expression. M I . ■[• mi r ' mi] If 162 NO TITLE. i: Ho started to jiis feet, and roared: "Yoiid— d Frenchman ! " I instantly changed my tactics, and endeavor- ed to embrace him. He kicked me twice violent- ly. I begged permission to kiss madame's hand. He replied by throwing me down stairs. I am in bed with my head bound up, and beef- steaks upon my eyes, but still confident and buoy. ant. I have not lost faith in Macchiavelli. Tra la la ! as they sing in the opera. 1 kiss every body's hands. CHAPTEE V. i ji! t It DR. DIGGS'S STATEMENT. My name is David Biggs. I am a surgeon, hv- ing at No. 9 Tottenham Court. On the l5th of June, 1854, I was called to see an elderly gentle- man lodging on the Kent Eoad. Found him high- ly excited, with strong febrile symptoms, pulse 120, increasing. Repeated incoherently what I judged to be the popular form of a conundrum. On closer examination found acute hydrocepha- lus and both lobes of the brain rapidly filling up U (1— ti fleavor- k'ioient- s liaiul tl beef, buoy. Tra s every IfO TITLE. 163 i with water. In consultation with an eminent phrenologist, it was further discovered that all the organs were more or less obliterated, except tliat of Comparison. Hence the patient was en- abled to only distinguish the most conunon points of resemblance bcitween objects, without drawing upon fa^tulties, such as Ideality or Language, for assistance. Later in the day found him sinking — being evidently unable to carry the most ordin- ary conundrum to a successful issue. Exhib- ited Tinct. Val. Ext. Opii, and Camphor, and pre- scribed quiet and emollients. On the 17th the patient was missing. on, liv- [5th of gontle- 1 high- , pulse .^hat I drum, sepha. ng up CHAPTER LAST. STATEMENT OP THE PURLISIIEIl. On the I8th of June, Mr. Wilkie Collins left a roll of manuscript with us for publication, with- out title or direction, since which time he has not been heard from. In spite of the care of the proof-readers, and valuable literary assistance, it is feared that the continuity of the story has been destroyed by some accidental misplacing of chap- ters during its progress. How and what chapters are so misplaced, the publisher leaves to an indul- gent public to discover. "til « .J . , m ;* ,ji| is ■ I.I-:- ^' if -i ■ I..'' ■ ■ i' J ■ ■ '■ ' If ^ i • It" » h i \ly% NN. KEINO A NOVEL IN THE FRENCH PARA«RAPniC STYLE. — Mademoiselle, I swear to you that I love you. — You who read tliese pages. You who turn your burning eyes upon these words — words that I trace — Ah, Heaven ! the thought maddens me. — I will bo calm. I will imitate the reserve of the festive Englishman, who wears a spotted handkerchief which he calls a Bdchio, who eats biftek, and caresses a bulldog. I will subdue myself like him. — Ha ! Poto-beer ! All right — Goddam ! — Or, I will conduct myself as the free-born American — the gay Brother Jonathan ! I \vill whittle me a stick. I will whistle to myself "Yankee Doodle," and forget my passion in exces- sive expectoration. — Hoho ! — wake snakes and walk chalks. I N'. X. A XOVKl,. 16") Tlie world is divided into t\vo great divisions, — Paris and the provinces. Tlu-rc is hut one Paris. Thereare several provinces, among wlncii may bo niinibored England, America, Ilussia, and Italy. N N. was a Parisian. But NN. did not live in Paris. Drop a Paris- ian in tl>e provinces, and you drop a part ot* Paris with him. Drop him in Seneganibia, and in three days he will give you an omelette sou^ee, or a pate de foie (jrafi, served by the neatest of Sene- gambian /77/^s, whom he will call Mademoiselle. In three weeks he will give you an opera. N N. was not dropped in Senegambia, but in San Francisco, — quite as awkward. They find gold in San Francisco, but they don't understand gilding. N»N. existed three years in this place. He be- came bald on the top of his head, as all Parisians do. Look down from your box at the Opera Comique, Mademoiselle, and count the bald crowns of the fast young men in the pit. Ah — you tremble ! They show where th'^ arrows of love have struck and glanced off. N. N. was also near sighted, as all Parisians finally^d>ecome. This is a gaUant provision of Nature to spare them the mortification of observ- 5 w- ; I I ■m ii m !■. : i ■ if inn \ N. A NOVEL. iiig t)mt the ' ■ friends grow old. After a certain ago every wo. - n is handsome to a Paris- ian. One day N. N. was walking down Washington street. Suddenly he stopped. He was standmg before the door of a mantua- maker. ]5eside the counter, at the further ex- tremity of the shop, stood a young and elegantly formed woman. Her face was turned from N. N. He entered. With a plausible excuse and seeming indifference, he gracefully opened con- versation with the mantuamaker as only a Paris- ian can. But he had to deal with a Parisian. His attempts to view the features of the fair stranger by the counter were deftly combated by the shop-woman. He was obliged to retire. N. N. went home and lost his appetite. He was haunted by the elegant basque and gracijful shoulders of the fair unknown, during the whole night. The next day he sauntered by the mantuama- ker. Ah! [leavens! A thrill ran through his frame, and his fingers tingled with a delicious electricity. The fair inconnne was there! He raised his hat gracefully. He was not certain, but he thought a slight motion of her faultless bonnet betrayed recognition. He would have t ] y. N. N. A NOVEL. 1G7 wildly darted into the shop, but just then the lig- ui'Gofthe mantuamaker appeared hi the door- way. — Did Monsieur wish anything ? Misfortune ! Desperation. N. N. purchased a bottle of Prussic acid, a sack of charcoal, and a quire of pink note paper, and returned home. He wrote a letter of farewell to the closely fitting basque, and opened the bottle of Prussic acid. Some one knocked at his door. It was a Chi- naman, with his weekly linen. These Chinese are docile, but not intelligent. They are ingenious, but not creative. They are cunning in expedients, but deficient in tact. In love they are simply barbarous. They purchase their wives openly, and not constructively by at- torney. By offering small sums for their sweet- hearts, they degrade the value of their sex. Nevertheless, N. N. felt that he was saved. He explained all to the faithful Mongolian, and exhibited the letter he had written. He imph)r- ed him to deliver it. The Mongolian assented. The race are not cleanly or sweetly savoured, but N. N. fell upon his neck. He embraced him wtth one hand, and closed his nostrils with the other. Through him, he felt he clasped the close-fitting basque. i >i % 108 N. N. A NOVEL. ,! 'T' '^a'.K : !• 'i;;-; r ■.ii2 I The next day was one of agony and suBponsc. Evening came, but no Mercy. N. N. lit the char- coal. But, to compose his nerves, ho closed his door, and first walked mildly up and down Mont- gomery Street. When he returned, he found the faithful Mongolian on the steps. —All lity ! These Chinese are not accurate in their pro- nunciation. They avoid the r, like the English nobleman. N. N. gasped for breath. He leaned heavily against the Chinaman. — Then you have seen her, Ching Long ? — Yes. All lity. She cum. Top side of house. The docile barbarian pointed up the stairs, and chuckled. — She here — impossible ! Ah, Heaven ! do I dream? — Yes. All lity, — top side of the house. Good by, John. This is the familiar parting epithet of the Mon- golian- It is equivalent to our au revoir. N N. gazed with a stupefied air on the depart- ing servant. He placed his liand on his throbbing heart. She here, — alone beneath this roof. Heavens, — what happiness ! m {V, l' N. N. A NOVEL. I GO But how? Tom from hor homo. Ruthlcsslv dragged, perhaps from hor evening dovotious, hv the hands of a rolontloss barl)ariiin. C'onld sho forgive him ? Ho dashed frantically up the stairs. lie open- ed the door. She was standhig 1 eiide Ijis couch with averted face. A strange giddiness overtook him. He sank upon his knees at the threshold. — Pardon, pardon. My angel, can you forgive me ! A terrible nausea, now seemed added to the fearful giddiness. His utterance grew thick and sluggish. — Speak, speak, encluuitros;s. Forgiveness is all I ask. My Love, my Life ! She did not answer. He'stagg ered to his feet. As he rose his eyes fell upon the pan of burning charcoal" A terrible suspicion Hashed across his mind. This giddiness, — this nausea. The ig- norance of the barbarian. This silence. merciful heavens ! she was dying. He crawled toward her. He touched her. She fell forward with a lifeless sound upon the floor. He uttered a piercing shriek, and threw himself beside her. r !d ■'■ IB '-:< * 170 N. N. A NOVEL. ^^ A file of gciitlai'mes,accorapauio(I by tho Chef- Burko, found liim tho next morning lying help- lessly upon the Moor. They hiughed brutally, — these cruel minions o'^ the law, — and disengaged his arm from the waist of tho wooden dummy which they had come to reclaim for the mantua- maker. Emptying a few bucketfuls of water over his form, they tinally succeeded in robbing him, not only of his mistress but of that Death he had coveted without her. Ah ! we live in a strange world. Messieurs. ) -' if' I FAiXTiNE AFTER THE FRENCH OF VICTOIt HUGO. PROLOGU]]. As long a ; there sliall exist throe parutloxes, a moral Frenchman, a religious Atheist, and a believing sceptic ; so long, in fact, as bookseJlers shall wait — say twenty five years— for a new gospel ; so long as paper shall remain cheap anil ink three sous a bottle, 1 have no hesitation in saying such books as these are utterly profitless. ' Victor Hugo. I. 'M o -t \i 1'* To be good itJ to be queer. What is a good man ? Bishop Myriel. My friend, you will possibly object to this. You will say you know what a good man is. Per- haps you will say your clergyman is a good man, for instance. Bah ! you are mistaken ; you are an English- man, and an Englishman is a beast. ■iji - r^f I ! ! I Ik Ml '. 172 FA NT INK. Eiiglishinon think they are moral when they arc onlv serious. These Knsjlishmen also wear ill-shaped hats, and dress horribly ! Ball ! they :ire nniaillc. Still, J^isho]) Myriel was a good man, — quite as gocxl as you. Better than you, in fact. One day M. Myriel was in Paris. This angel used to walk about the street like any other man He was not proud, though iine-looking. Well, three ijinninH de Paris called him badnnmes. Says one : — "Ah, vum Dicu ! there goes a priest ; look out for your cGfji:s and chickens !" What did this good man do. He called to them kindly. " My children," said he, "this is clearly not your fault. I recognize in this insult and irrev- erence only the fault of your immediate pro- genitors. Let us pray for your immediate pro- genitors." They knelt down and prayed for their imme- diate progenitors. The eflect was touchinuj. The Bishop looked calmly around. "On reflection," said he, gravely, "I was mis- taken ; this is clearly the fault of Society. Let us pray for Society." FANTINE. 173 rear igel They knelt down and prayed for Society. The effect was sublimer yet. Wliat do you think of that ? You, I mean. Everybody remembers the story of the l^ishop and Mother Nez Ectroussc (.)ld jVIotlier Nez Eotrousso sold asparagus. S!io was poor ; there's a great deal of meaning in that word, my friend. Some people say, "poor but honest." I say, "Bah ! Bishop Myi'iel bought six bunches of aspara- gus. This good man had one charming failing ; he was fond of asparagus. He gave her a franc and received three 6t>//.s change. The sous were bad, — counterfeit. What did this good Bishop do ? He said : '' I should not have taken change from a poor woman." Then afterwards, to his housekeeper : *' Never take change from a poor woman." Then he added to himself : *• For the mun will probably be bad." II. When a man commits a crime, society claps him in prison. A prison is one of the worsl hotels imaginable. The people tliere are low and vulgar. The butter is bad, the cottee is green. Ah, it is horrible ! ff I i ft ■' If I ■ ^- -jy ■; * .■■i r , . t l^ ?! 'I !i 174 FANTINE. In prison, as in a bad hotnl, a man soon loses, not only his morals, but what is worse to a Frenchman, liis sense of refinement and delicacy. Jean Valjean came from prison with confused notions of society. He forgot the modern pecu- liarities of hospitality. So lie walked oflf with the Bishop's candlesticks. Let us consider : candlesticks were stolen ; that was evident. Society put Jean Valjean in prison; that was evident, too. In prison, Society took away liis refinement ; that is evident, like- wise. Who is Society ? You and I are Society. My friend, you and I stole those candlesticks ! III. The Bishop thought so, too. lie meditated profoundly for six days. On the morning of the seventh he went to the Prefecture of Po- lice. He said : " Monsieur, have me arrested. I have stolen candlesticks." The ofiioial was governed by the law of Socie- ty, and refused. What did this Bisliop do ? FANTINE. 176 He had a charming ball and chain made, affix- ed to his leg, and wore it the rCvSt of his life. This is a fact ! rv. Love is a mystery. A little friend of mine down in the country, at Anvergnc, said to me one day : " Victor, Love is the world, — it contains everything." She was only sixteen, this sharp-witted little girl, and a beautiful blonde. She thought every- thing of me. Fantine was one of those women who do wrong in the most virtuous and touching man- ner. This is a peculiarity of French grisettes. You are an Englishman, and you don't under- stand. Learn, my friend, learn. Come to Paris and improve your morals. Fantine was the soul of modesty. She .ilways wore high-neck dresses. High-neck dresses are a sign of modesty. Fantine loved Tholmoyes. Why ? My Clod ! What are you to do ? It was the fault of her parents, and she had n't any. How shall you teach her ? You must tracli the parent if you wish to educate the child, How would you be- come virtuous ? Teach your grandmother ! » ''MM - JhMl 111.* t"MM' f .^ui. 176 M^i FANTINK. V. When Tholmoyes van n^vay from Fantine, — wliicli was done in a charming, gentleLianly man- ner, — Fantine becamo, convinced that a rigid sense of jiropriety miglit look upon her conduct as immoral. She was a creature of sensitiveness, and her eyes wor.' opened. She was virtuous still, and resolved to break ott the liaison at once. So she put up her wardr(?be and baby in a bundle. Child as she was she lovf>d them both. Then left Paris. VI. Fantine's native place had clianged. M. Madeline — an angel, and inventor of jet- work — had been teaching the villagers how to make spurious jet. This is a progressive age. Those Americans, children of the West, — they make nutmegs out of wood. I myself, have seen hams made of pine, in the wi'T^wnms of those children of the forest. i'Ut civil* zation has acquired deception too. Sceiety m made up of deception. Even the best F:ien*:h society. biil) i;bei"e was one sincere episode. The French Revolution ! ii " in- let is, a FANTIXK. VII. 177 M. Madeline was, if anything, bettor tlian Myriel. M. Myriel was a saint. M. Madeline a good man. M. Myriel was dead. M. Madeline wcs living. That made all the difference. M. Madeline made virtue profitable. I have seen it written : — " Be virtuous and you will be happy." Where did I see this written ? In the modern Bible? No. In the Koran? No. In Rousseau? No. Diderot ? No. Where then ? In a copy-book. VIII. M. Madeline was M. le Mai re. This is how it came about. For a long time he refused the honor. One day an old woman, standing on the steps, said : " Bah, a good mayor is a good thing. ** You are a good tiling. " Be a good mayor." Tiiis woman was a rhetorician. She under- stood inductive ratiocination. p } , ■^ w\ mif ^B ' ^ ' B' i i 1 M u|h B'i 1' ' t$ «•; H ' 'll^ oummUKm i jii l ll-i i | ]»j « m I ui. j r im l uf w .u ii mi ij m u ' m i rTfnmu mtia^-i r t ll ' '< 178 KANTJNK IX. k \ When this good M. Madeline, whom the reader will perceive iiuTst liavc been a former convict, and a very bad man, gave himself up to justice as tl.e real Jean Valjean, about this same time, Fantine was turned away from the manufactory, and met with a number of losses from society. Society jittacked her, and this is *vhat she lost : First her 'over. Then her child. Tlien her place. Then her hair. Tiien her teeth. Then her libertv. Then her life. What do you ihhxk ol" society :ifter that? 1 tell vou the i>r( s«.nt social system is a lnunbu left. An rcroir my- -friend. "LA FEMME." AFTER THE FRENCH OF M. MICH E LET. WOMEN AS AN INSTITUTION. "If it were not for Avomen, few of us would at present be in existence." Tins is the renuirk of a cautious and discreet writer. lie was also sagacious and intelligent. Woman ! Look upon her and and admire her. Gaze upon her and love her. If she wishes to embrace you, jjermit her. Kemember she is weak and you are strong. But don't treat her unkindly. Don't make love to another woman before her face, even if she be your wife. Don't do it. Always bo polite, oven should she fancy somebody hetter than you. If your mother, my dear Anadis, liad not i' :KiUS'iv: t*^ m ': I -.1 tm 111; II' I i pit' 5;:; ■ ii;;;ki !t!l|S6! I 180 " LA FEMME.'" fancied your iiither bettor thun f>;uinol)()(ly, you iniglil liiivc been that Homebody'H won. Consider thiH. Always be a philosoplicr, even about women. Few men understand women. I^\*eneh- men, perhaps, better tlian any one else. 1 am a Frenchman. II. THE INFANT. She v^ a child — a little thing — an infivnt. She has a mother and ftxther. Let us suppose, for example, tljcy are married. Let us be moral if we cannot be happy and free — they are mar- ried — perhaps — they love one another — who knows ? But she knows nothing of this; she is an infant — a small thing — a trifle ! She is not lovelj- at first. It is cruel, per- haps, but she is red, and positivol}- ugly. She feels this keenly and cries. She weeps. Ah, my God, how she weeps ! Her cries and lamen- tations now are really distressing. Tears stream from her in floods. She feels deeply and copiously like M. Alphonso do La- martinc in his Confessions* u LA FEMME. 181 If you arc her mothor, Madame, you will fancy worms ; you will examine her linen for pins and what not. Ah ! hypocrite ! 3'ou, oven you, misunderstand her. Yet she has charming natural impulses. See how she tosses her dimpled arms. She looks longingly at her mother. SJjo has a language of her own. She saj'-s, ^' goo goo," and "gaga." She demands something — this infant ! She is faint, poor thing. She famishes. She wishes to be restored. Restore her, Mother ! It is the first duty of a mother to restore her child ! ,-11 S" 'I; ( f'.li V' III. THE DOLL. She is hardly able to walk ; she already tot. tors under the weight of a doll. It is a charming and elegant affair. It has pink checks and purple-black hair. She prefers brunettes, for she has already, with the quick knowledge of a French infant, perceived she is blonde, and that her doll cannot rival her. Mon Dieu, how touching! Happy child! She spends hours in preparing its toilet. She begins '':Ui r ki .,,><* I I |iP# Ci I ^ f ;/ Is * i I 182 " LA FEMME." to show her tasto in the exquisite details of its dress. She loves it madly, devotedly. She will prefer it to bonbons. She already anticipates the wealth of love she will hereafter pour oui on her lover, her mother, her father, and liiially perhaps, her husband. This is the time the anxious parent will guide these first outpourings. She will read her ex- tracts from Michelet's L^ Amour, Rosseau's Heloise; and the Eevue des deux Mondes. IV. THE MUD PIE. She was in tears to-day. She had stolen away from her homie and was with some rustic infants. The}- had noses in the air, and large, coarse hands and feet. They had seated themselves around a pool in the road, and were fashioning fantastic shapes in the clayey soil with their hands. Her throat swelled and her eyes sparkled with delight as, for the first time, her soft palms touched the plastic mud. She made a graceful and lovely pie. She stuffed it with stones for almondr* and plums. She forgot everything. It was being " LA FBMME." 183 bilked in the solar mys, whou madum^ c*am« juul took her away. She weeps. It is night, and she is weopiog still. V. t I HER FIRST LOVE. She no longer doubts her beauty. She is loved. She saw him secretly. He is vivacious and sprightly. He is famous. Ho has already had an atl'air with Finfin, the fille de chambre, and poor Finfin is desolate. Ho is noble. She knows he is the son of Madame la Baronne Couturiere. She adores him. She affects not to notice him. Poor little thing ! Hippolyte is distracted — annihilated — inconsolable and charmini'. She admires his boots, his cravat, his little gloves — his exquisite pantaloons — his coat, and cane. She offers to run away with him. He is transported, but magnanimous. He is wearied, perhaps. She sees him the next day offering flow- ers to the daughter of Madame la Comtesse Blan- chisseuse. She is again in tears. !i IMAGE EVALUATION TEST TARGET (MT-S) z LO I.I Jim 1 1^ IM 1.8 1.25 1.4 1.6 .« 6" - ► Photographic Sciences Corporation 23 WE^T MAIN STREET WEBSTER, N.Y. 14580 (716) 872-4503 ^^^ .y 184 i(. LA KKMMB. She roads Paul et Virginie. She is secretly transported. When she reads how the exemplary young woman laid down her life rather than appear en deshabille to her lover, she weeps again. Tasteful and virtuous Bernardine de St. Pierre ! — the daughters of France admire you ! All this time her doll is headless in the cabinet. The mud pie is broken on the road. yi. THE WIPE. She is tired of loving and she marries. Her mother thinks it, on the whole, the best thing. As the day approaches she is found fre- quently in tears. Her mother will not permit the affianced one to see her, and he makes several attempts to commit suicide. But something haj^pens. Perhaps it is winter, and the water is cold. Perhaps there are not enough people present to witness his heroism. In this way her future husband is spared to her. The ways of Providence arc indeed myste- rious. At this time her mother will talk with her. She will ofter philosophy. She will tell her .she was married herself " LA PEMME ' 185 But what is this new Jind ravishing light that breaks upon her? The toilet and wedding- clothes ! She is in a new sphere. She makes out her list in her own charming writing. Here it is. Let every mother heed it.-^^ jK '}» 'K ^K ^K 'J* '1^ I* She is married. On the day after, she meets her old lover, Hippolyte. He is again trans- ported. VII. HER OLD AGE. A Frenchwoman never grows old. • The delicate reader will appreciate the omission oi certain articles for which English synonymes arc forbid- den. (i I • t liSH |i liiii ' la ■I 1 11 MARY MOGILLUR A SOUTHERN NOVEL. After BELLE BOYD. WITH AN INTRODUCTION BY G. A. S — LA. INTRODUCTION. " Will you write me up ?" The scene was near Temple Bar. The speaker was the famous rebel Mary McGillup, — a young girl of fragile form, and long, lustrous black hair. I must confess that the question was a peculiar one, and, under the circum- stances, somewhat puzzling. It was true I had been kindly treated by the Northerners, and, though ^/^'cjudiced against them, was to some extent under obligations to them. It was true that I know little or nothing of Ame- rican politics, history, or geography. But when did an English writer ever weigh such trifles ? Turning to the speaker, I inquired with som6 caution the amount of pe- cuniary compensation offered for the work. " Sir !" she said, drawing her fragile form to its full height, " you yisult me, — you insult the South." !«.. MARY M'gILLUP. 187 L. leer was the of fragile onfess that le circum- had been i^-'ejudiced gations to g of Ame- len did an ing to the unt of pe- its full »« But look ye here, d' ye sue — the tin — the blunt — the ready — the stiff, yoii know. Don't ye see, we can't do without that, you know !" « It shall be contingent on the succtss of the story," she answered haughtily. " In the mean time take this precious gem." And drawing a diamond ring from her finger, she placed it with a roll of MSS. in my hands and vanished. Although unable to procure more than Jb'l 2s. Gd. from an intelligent pawnbroker to whom I stated the circum- stances and with whom I pledged the ring, my sympa- thies with the cause of a downtrodden and chivalrous people were at once enlisted. I could not help wonder- ing that in rich England, the home of the oppressed and the free, a young and lovely wom-an like the fair author of those pages should bo obliged to thus pawn her jewels — her marriage gift — for the means to grocure her bread ! With the exception of the English aristocracy, — who much resemble them, — I do not know of a class of people that I so much admire as the Southern planters- May I become better acquainted with both ! Since writing the above, the news tf Mr. Lincoln's assassination has reached mo. It is enough for me to say that I am dissatisfied with the result. I do not attempt to excuse the assassin. Yet there will be men who will charge this act upon the chivalrous South. This leads me to repeat a remark once before made by me in this connection, which has become justly celebrated. It is this : — " It is usual, in cases of murder, to look for the crimi- nal among those who expect to be benefited by the 188 MARY m'gILLUP. crime. In the death of Lincoln his immediate successor in office alone receives the benefit of his dying." If her Majesty Queen Victoria were assassinated, which heaven forbid, the one most bcnefifed by her decease would, of course, be his Royal Highness the Prince of Wales, her immediate successor. It would be unnecessary to state that suspicion would at once point to the real culprit, which would of course be his Royal Highness. This is logic. But I have done. After having thus stated my opin- ion in favor of the South, I would merely remark that there is One who judgeth all things, — who weigheth the cause between brother and brother, — and awardeth the perfect retribution ; and whose ultimate decision I, as a British subject, have only anticipated. G. A. S. CHAPTER I. Every reader of Belhe Boyd's narrative will remember an allusion to a " lovely, fragile- looking girl of- nineteen," who rivalled Belle Boyd in devotion to the Southern cause, and who, like her, earned the enviable distinction of being a " rebel spy." I am that "fragile" young creature. Al- though on friendly terms with the late Miss Boyd, now Mrs. Hardinge, candor compels me to state that nothing but our common politics MARY m'GILLUP. 189 d my oi)in. remark that eigheth tliu ■vardeth the sion I, as a G. A. S ative will , fragile- led Belle luse, and isti notion re. Al- ate Miss pels me politics prevents me from exposing the ungenerous spirit she has displayed in this allusion. To bo dismissed in a single paragraph after years of — But I anticipate. To put up with this feeble and forced acknowledgment of services rendered would be a confession of a craven spirit, which, thank God, though "/*m^i7e" and only ^^ nine- teen," I do not possess. I may rot have the « blood of a Howard" in my veins, as some peo- ple, whom I shall not disgrace myself by nam- ing, claim to have, but I have yet to learn that the race of McGillup ever yet brooked slight or insult. I shall not say that attention in certain quarters seems to have turned some people's heads ; nor that it would have been more deli- cate if certain folks had kept quiet on the sub- ject of their courtship, and the rejection of cer- tain oifers, when it is known that their forward conduct was all that procured them a husband ! Thank Heaven, the South has some daughters who are above such base considerations ! While nothing shall tempt me to reveal the promises to share equally the fame of certain enterprisesj which were made by one who shall now be nameless, I have deemed it only just to myself to put my own adventures upon record. If they are not equal to those of another individual 1 1 u m J I 190 MART MGILLUr. it is because, though " fragile," my education has taught me to have some causideration for the truth. I am done. CHAPTER II. I WAS born in Missouri. My dislike for the Northern scum was inherent. This was shown, at an early age, in the extreme distaste I exhibited for Webster's spelling-book, — the work of a well-known Eastern Abolitionist. I cannot be too grateful for the consideration shown by my chivalrous father, — a gentleman of the old school, — who resisted to the last an attempt to introduce Mitchell's Astronomy and Geography into the public school of our district. When I state that this same Mitchell became afterward a hireling helot in the Yankee Army, every intelligent reader will appreciate the prophetic discrimination of this true son of the South. I was eight years old when I struck the first blow for Southern freedom against the North- ern Tryant. It is hardly necessary to state that in this instance the oppressor was a pale, overworked New England " school marm." The principle for which I was contending, I felt, however, to be the same. Resenting an affront put upon me, I one day heaved a rock ^ at the * Note by G. A. S. — In the Southwest, any stone larger than a pea is termed a " rock." 3IARY M'GILLUP. 191 [oduoation t*ation for slike for This was e clistasto ?ok,— the ionist. I sicleration entleman last an lomy and r district, i became ee Army, 3iate the 'on of the > the first le North- to state » a pale, I." The U I felt, n aifront * at the 5ne larger head of the Vandal schoolmistress. I was seized and overpowered. My pen falters as I reach the climax. English readers will not give credit to this sickening story, — the civilized world will avert its head, — but I, Mary McGil- liip, was publicly spanked ! CHAPTER III. But the chaotic vortex of civil war approached and fell destruction, often procrastinated, brood- ed in storm.f As the English people may like to know what was really the origin of the re- bellion, I have no hesitation in giving them the true and only cause. Slavery had nothing to do with it, although the violation of the Decla- ration of Independence, in the disregard by the North of the Fugitive Slave Law,*f* might have provoked a less fiery people than the South- rons. At the inception of the struggle a large amount of Southern indebtedness was held by the people of the North. To force payment t I make no pretensioa to fine writing, but peri;aps Mrs. Hardinge can lay over that. 0, of course ! M. McG. * The Declaration of Independence grants to each subject " the pursuit of life, liberty, and happiness." A fugitive slave may be said to personify " life, liberty, and happiness." Hence his pursuit is really legal. This is logic. G. A. S. i ■* i 'i ' 192 MAUY M*GILLUr. from tho generous but insolvent debtor — to ob- tain liquidation from tho Southern planter— was really the soulless and mercenary ubjeet of the craven Northerners. Let the common people of England look to this. Let tho improvident literary hack ; the starved impecunious Grub Street debtor; the newspaper frequenter of sponging-houses, remember this in their criti- cisms of the vile and slavish Yankee. C^HAPTEK IV. The roasting of an Abolitionist, by a greatly infuriated community, vv^as my first taste of the horrors of civil war. Heavens ! Why will the North persist in this fractricidal warfare? The expulsion of several Union refugees, which soon followed, now fairly plunged my beloved State in the seething vortex. I was sitting at the piano one afternoon, singing that stirring refrain, sojustly celebrated, but which a craven spirit, unworthy of England, has excluded from some of her principal restau- rants, and was dwelling with some enthusiasm on the following lino : — " Huzza! she spurns the Northern scum!" when a fragment of that scum, clothed in that detestable blue uniform which is the symbol of oppression, entered the apartment. " I have the MAUY MOILLUr. lua >»•— to Ob. itor-~;vus |«c't of tlie people of fprovidcnt pus Grub |»entoi' of icir criti- ikoo. a greatly sto of the y will the re? The hich soon >ved State ifternoon, slebrated, England, al restau- thusiasm III" in that ^mbol of have the honor of addressing the celebrated rebel Hpy, Mi^s McGillup," .said the Vandal officer. In a moment I was perfoclly calm. Witli the exception of slightly expectorating twice in the face of the minion, 1 did not betray my agitation. Haughtily, yet Hrnil}', I replied : — " I am." "You looked, as if you might be," the brute replied, as he turned on his heel to leave the apartment. In an instant 1 threw myself before him. "You shall not leave here thus," I shrieked, grappling him with an energy which no one, seeing my frail figure, would have believed. "I know the reputation of your hireling crew. I read your dreadful purpose in your eye. Tell mo not that your designs are net sinister. You came hero to insult me, — to kiss me, perhaps. You sha' n't, — 3^ou naughty man. Go away !" The blush of conscious degradation rose to the cheek of the Lincoln hireling as he turned his face away from mine. In an instant I drew my pistol from my belt, which, in anticipation of some such outrage, I always carried, and shot him. CHAPTER V. " Thy forte was less to act than speak, Maryland ! Thy politics were changed each week, Maryland I il \04 MAUY MdlLLUI'. ' m With Northern Vandftla thou wast meek, With syniputhi/erH thou woukl'Ht shriek, I know tlici' — (), 'twus like thy chtck ! Maiyhuid! my ftlnryhuul!" After committing the act doscribod in the proceeding chapter, which every English reader will pardon, I went up stiiir.s, put on u clean pair of stockings, and, placing a rose in my lustrous black hair, proceeded at once to the camp ol' Generals Price and Mosby to put them in possession of information which would lead to the destruction of a portion of the Federal Army. During a great part of my flight I was exposed to a running fire from the Federal pickets of such coarse expressions as, *' Go it, Sally Eeb," " Dust it, my Confederate beauty," but I succeeded in reaching the glorious southern camp uninjured. In a week afterwards I was arrested, by a lettre de cachet of Mr. Stanton, and placed in the Bets- tile* British readers of my story will express surprise at these terms, but I assure them that not only these articles but tumbrils, guillotines, and conciergeries wore in active use among the Federals. If substantiation be required, I refer to the Charleston Mercury, the only reliable organ, next to the New York Daily News, published in the country. At the J5rt5fi7elmade the acquaint- ance of the accomplished and elegant author of Guy Jbivingstone,^ to whom I presented a curiously * The recent conduct of Mr. Livingstone renders him unworthy of my notice. His disgusting praise of Belle Boyd, and complete ignoring of my claims, show the art- fulness of some females and puppyism of some men. M. McU MART M OILLUP. \9% carved tliigh bone of a Union officer, and from whom I recoivod the following beautiful acknow- ledgment : — ii Demoiselle : — Should I ever win hanie to my ain countrie, I Diukc mine avow to enshrino in my reliquaire this elegant bijouterie and offering of La Belle Kebelle. Nay, methinks this fraction of man'H anatomy were somu compensation for the rib lost by the ' grand old gardener/ Adam." CHAPTER VI. KsLEASED at last from durance vile and placed on board of an Erie canal-boat, on my way to Canada, I for a moment breathed the sweets of liberty. Perhaps the interval gave me oppor- tunity to indulge in certain reveries which I had hitherto sternly dismissed. Henry Breckin- ridge Folair, a consistent copperhead, captain of the canal-boat, again and again pressed that suit 1 had so often rejected. It was a lovely moonlight night. We sat on the deck of the gliding craft. Tlie moonbeam and the lash of the driver fell softly on the flanks of the off horse, and only the surging of the tow-rope broke the silence. Folair's arm clasped my waist. I suffered it to remain. Placing in my lap a small but not ungrateful roll of checkerberry lozenges, he took the oc- casion to rej)eat softly in my ear the words of a motto he had just unwrapped — with its graceful 196 MARY MOIIiliUP. covering of the tissue paper — from a sugar almond. The heart of the wicked little rebel, Mary McGillup, was won ! The story of Mary McGrillup is done. I might have added the journa' of my husband, Henry Breckinridge Folair, but Di it refers chiefly to his freights, and a schedule of his passengers, 1 have been obliged, reluctantly, to suppress it. It is due to my friends to say that I have been requestod not to write this book. Expres- sions have reached my ears, the revsrse of com- plimentary. I had beeL told that its publica- tion will probably insure my banishment for life. Be it so. If the cause for which I labored have been subserved, 1 am content. K. r I London, May 1865. THE END." « U .\)if', /)w . li ♦,. / /