QJP 
 
 111 $ 
 

 
 
 
Uniform 'with this Volume 
 
 JOCK, JACK, AND 
 THE CORPORAL 
 
 By Rev. C. C. MARTINDALE. 
 
 Wrapper, 3s. 6d. net. 
 
 “ Fr. Martindale has done a great number of things 
 well, but nothing better in its way than ‘Jock, Jack, 
 and the Corporal.’ ... We have never recommended 
 a volume with greater pleasure . - ’ — Catholic Book 
 Notes. 
 
 ‘‘We see Fr. Martindale wrestling with his invalids, 
 trying to persuade those battered warriers that Christ 
 and His message are not above them or beyond them, 
 but just for them ; labouring with endless play of con- 
 ceit and phrase till it all seems one big joke, and all the 
 more tremendous at that. And he is working at the 
 reader too, arousing him, coaxing him, and in the end 
 winning him too.’ — Tablet. 
 
 * 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 

 
 
 * 
 
 
 
MR* 
 
 FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 C. C. MARTINDALE ^ 
 
 f 
 
 B 0 CT 6 S ObitMB BSUX- 
 
 CHESTNUT H^L, 
 
 MATRE & COMPANY 
 CHICAGO 
 1922 
 
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 Printed in Great Britain 
 
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 A? 6 J 
 
MEDICO DILECTO 
 
 M y dear dr. counsell. 
 
 On the day which has brought the news of a great sorrow 
 for us to share, I have decided to offer you this continuation 
 of Jock * No one can doubt but that your help meant every- 
 thing to Father Plater during this difficult year, and I can never 
 feel thankful enough for having so obstinately urged you to take the 
 holiday you so much needed, by way of escorting him to Malta* 
 That journey has left you with many memories besides its anxious 
 ones, and you witnessed the quite extraordinary affection and 
 enthusiasm which seemed to spring up wherever he passed* 
 Pertransiit benefaciendo * 
 
 On the way back you say you had Jock for travelling companion ; 
 you must detect his influence throughout this second volume, 
 though I seldom name it* 
 
 Perhaps you will say that Mr* Francis Newnes has caused me to 
 fall heavily between two stools, and that it is neither a proper in- 
 struction book, nor, assuredly, a craftsmanlike story* Well, the 
 two stools were there; but, from the start, I decided not even to 
 try to sit on either of them* I assumed deliberately a safe and 
 humble position on the floor between them* I have meant to em- 
 phasize some four points which were (naturally) not much insisted 
 on in Jock, though even there you will find them sticking out undis- 
 guised; and I have wanted to live a little longer in the company (for 
 as such I feel it) of people whom I loved* Hence the story comes 
 down, I own, with a thud on to the heavy fields of 44 instruction ” 
 at least four times; and here and there the path across that plain 
 
viii MEDICO DILECTO 
 
 may seem to become invisible* Still, I trust that it remains, and 
 may be tracked by an observant eye* 
 
 I know, anyhow, that you won't just condemn it, spiritually, as 
 vulgarized “ propaganda/' nor artistically, as a novel 44 with a 
 purpose*" The Creator had a purpose in His great Poem; I have 
 no wish to write just novels; but neither do I fear to try to incarnate, 
 in a measure, God's Catholic Truth* 
 
 So accept it, together with my personal gratitude and affection* 
 
 Campion Hall, 
 
 January 24-25, 1921. 
 
 C C* MARTINDALE* 
 
 P*S* — One or two paragraphs in Chapter III* I have not altered* 
 When I read the MS* to Father Plater, he laughed over them, and 
 would not have wished them changed* 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 Chapter I 
 
 
 
 44 AND with that,” said Mrs* Bolton, severely, 44 I puts my 
 fork down; and when I puts down my fork, they knows 
 what that means*” 
 
 She saw I was about to speak, and hastily proceeded* 44 What 
 Fve had to put up with time an' time again, none knows better than 
 your Reverence* Never a word said I when that Miss Jenkins as 
 you recommended left her shoe-cream in a plate by the fender an' 
 your Reverence's dog rolled in it; an' a nice mess the carpet would 
 be in this very minute 'ad I not brought up the parlour rug as was made 
 by St* Aloysius's Widows an' put it over the place as you can see 
 with your own eyes, though not suitable to a single bed-an'-sitting 
 room I will say* And never a word says I when the theatrical young 
 lady stood 'er stout bottles all of a row on the mantel an' started to 
 shoot at them with her — elastics,” said Mrs* Bolton, overcome with 
 a sudden but tremendous sense of decorum, 44 knowin' as 'ow you 
 wanted to get her for the Stage Guild an' trusting it would teach 
 'er better* An' there's much more as I've sat down under and said 
 no word, but offer a candle regular to St* Joseph as 'ow 'e would 
 bless the lodgers bein' the Head of families an' Patriarch of 'omes, 
 as Father O'Reilly said this very month of March* But when this 
 Miss Silver, though not your Reverence's recommendation an' never 
 would I suggest it, she marches into me own room, an' me at supper 
 an' tired out, with the 'Oly Father in 'er 'ands as Miss Barbara 
 give me, with the war on an' all, an' says she won't 'ave 'im hanging 
 in 'er room — well, I puts me fork down, an' the last straw it was, I 
 will say*” 
 
 44 But is she a violent anti-Catholic, or what ?” 
 
 Mrs* Bolton assumed a shrill voice, and clipped her words. 
 
 44 4 Of course, my dear Mrs* Bolton,' sez she, smilin' vinegar at 
 me , 4 it's not for myself I mind, an' the pore dear Roman Catholics 
 J i 
 
2 
 
 MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 are welcome to tlieir Pope whatever he may mean to them ' But at 
 
 that I ups an" 4 Pore they may be/ says 1, 4 but dear I am not. Miss, 
 nor will you find me so if so be as you speak against the 'Oly Father, 
 an' as for what he may mean to us, ' is meaning's clear an* definite 
 enough, an' not the same as some / I says with a significant nod an' 
 keeping me dignity; 4 though 1'm not denyin',' I says with a smile, 
 not wishin' to quarrel nor go against due charity, 4 though not 
 denyin' you might lose your way in his holy Palace of the Vatican, 
 it havin' one thousand an' eight hundred rooms (as your Reverence 
 told me yourself) an' never a 'ousemaid in it*' " 
 
 44 What did she say to that ?" 
 
 44 Well, she repeats as 'ow it isn't 'erself that minds, but it's along 
 of her friends, they bein' like to regard the Pope as an inkybus, 
 though what she meant I know not an' I care not, and a raxonary 
 drag on progress* And I ups once more an' 4 Well, Miss,' I says, 
 
 4 dash about you do and flash about you do, and never will I deny 
 it; but Fm not seeing much progress about your dashin' and your 
 flashin', not with prices what they are an' soaring steady*' For dash 
 she do, an' in and out all day, and her friends likewise, these three 
 blessed days, not to mention the newspaper young men, she writing 
 for the Babbacombe Bugle , an' signs herself 4 Clarionette,' as Mr* 
 Tuke of the Wilchurch Argus told me hisself, and have a good laugh 
 over her he did in this very room* And twice did I carry back the 
 'Oly Father with me own hands, and twice did she carry him down 
 again, and there you may see 'im leanin' against the dresser, an* 
 what to do I know not*" 
 
 She paused and folded her hands* 
 
 44 Well, anyhow," said I, 44 Miss Silver's course of lectures at the 
 Morris Institute only goes on for three weeks, I think; and after 
 that I've got a beautiful lodger for you, Mrs* Bolton* A Mr* John 
 Raikes; he was a sergeant, and very badly wounded, and became 
 a Catholic in hospital here* Miss Travers is giving him a part- 
 time job at their house; and he'll do some secretarial work at the 
 Social Guild, which'll keep him from standing up too much, and 
 he'll do odds and ends for me* He's a very steady fellow and a good 
 Catholic, and you'll like him and you'll be sure of your rent* So 
 what do you say to that ?" 
 
 44 Anything for that young lady," she exclaimed, lifting hands and 
 eyes to heaven, 44 anything for that sweet young lady most willingly 
 would I do* And anything to oblige your Reverence, it goes without 
 saying* And as for the pore gentlemen as has been wounded, there's 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 3 
 
 nothing I wouldn't do for them as is but right an' proper an' ever 
 will be. So it's thrice grateful an' willing I am for your Reverence's 
 kind offer. Though as for Miss Barbara Travers, who, if ever a 
 angel dropped from heaven she is him, why ever she don't marry 
 I cannot tell, though the man's not living who'd be good enough." 
 
 44 I've always had half a hope for my friend Captain Orwylstree, 
 d'you know 1 He was a fine soldier, and he'd give her a lovely 
 home. And he's a very sensible sort of Catholic. You heard him 
 make a speech at our soldiers' club once, if you remember !" 
 
 44 Do I not I" she replied, once more looking heavenwards. 44 And 
 God bless his kind heart, and wanted to make me dance the 'Esita- 
 tion Waltz or some such, he did, an' him in that lovely uniform an' 
 all. And a dream of a pair they'd make, the lambs 1" 
 
 44 Well, say a Hail Mary it may happen if it's meant to." 
 
 I rose. 
 
 44 Many a one I will," she promised. 44 And if your Reverence 
 could but pop up one moment to Miss Silver's an* put in a word for 
 the 'Oly Father, you could get round her Fm sure, an' the pore 
 holy gentleman be in his proper place once more. Respectful do 
 I beg it." 
 
 I whistled. 
 
 However, after a moment I decided to try. I wanted to see Miss 
 Silver. ♦ . . 
 
 So I ascended, and timidly knocked at her door. 
 
 44 Come . . ♦" called a rather reedy voice. 
 
 I entered, and stood hesitating. 
 
 44 Excuse me," I said, 44 I am a Catholic priest, and Mrs. " 
 
 44 The Priest ?" she cried, rising. 44 But how too interesting ! 
 Let me welcome you. Dare I feel your coming indicates a — an 
 Approach ? an Attitude ? . . ." 
 
 44 I'm sure," said I, very frightened, 44 that I can hardly regard 
 myself as — er, symbolical ♦ I merely " 
 
 44 Oh, but let me hope it 1" she interrupted. 44 An offered hand ! 
 
 A If but the great Roman Church would ♦ ♦ ♦ oh ! ♦ ♦ ♦ one 
 
 step ! ♦ ♦ . forward /" 
 
 I resolved to alter all my tactics. 
 
 44 I knew from Mrs. Bolton," said I, 44 that you were following 
 the lectures on the Ethics of Hygiene at the Morris Institute, and 
 that you were a stranger in Wilchurch; and I more than hoped I 
 might be able to be of a little use to you. ♦ . ." 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 4 
 
 “ Oh ?" she queried, rather surprised, but evidently curious. 
 
 “ Coming as you do from " suddenly I forgot where Babba- 
 
 combe was; I plunged recklessly: 44 from the Land's End — I keep 
 longing to go there — I thought it just possible you mightn't know 
 that the Social Guild has rather an important centre here. We co- 
 operate a good deal with the Institute." 
 
 44 Indeed ?" she said, more and more astonished. 
 
 “ We had a little strike here lately," I went on, 44 at the jam 
 factory. The strike was rather complicated, and involved the whole 
 turnip industry; but the men were in the right, and that was recog- 
 nized till the Tolstoi Tribunal introduced a good deal of bad blood 
 and outside speakers; and things were looking ugly till the Cathe- 
 dral, the Morris Institute, and the Social Guild went in a combined 
 deputation and saw managers and men together. Though, I confess, 
 it was the personal touch which smoothed things rather than argu- 
 ment. The representative of the factory and the leader of the men 
 had both, by an odd coincidence, forgotten their handkerchiefs; and 
 a priest, who is a friend of mine, by extraordinary good luck had a 
 clean one, and lent it to each of them. After that all went well." 
 
 She actually laughed. 
 
 “But how splendid!" she cried. “How sharing! The true 
 fraternal touch." 
 
 “ That is why," I went on hurriedly, “ I so much value getting 
 into personal contact with intelligent people from other parts. Now 
 your presence. Miss Silver, is exceptionally fortunate. You come 
 from the South, and we are a great link between the Midlands and 
 the North. I expect the social problems at Babbacombe are rather 
 — special; but you know how important the North is. Now we can 
 put a whole lot of unpublished information in your way. In fact, 
 I may say that since Mrs. Bolton tells me you represent the Babba- 
 combe Bugle , I don't see why you shouldn't regularly supply them 
 with a lot of unique matter which they'd never get otherwise." 
 
 Her eyes sparkled. Though dishevelled, she looked quite attrac- 
 tive when sincere. 
 
 “ I expect we'd be grateful, if you could possibly find time," 
 said I, “ to look in at our Leo Club one night. Named, of course, 
 after Pope Leo XIII. No doubt you know his series of social 
 encyclicals well. Working-men here are not so extraordinarily 
 keen students and debaters as in the North, but they get a very good 
 grip on those encyclicals. Of course, every Papal pronouncement 
 has an all but limitless influence. Come and join one of our dis- 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 5 
 
 cussions. Mr. Burton of the Morris Institute often comes, and our 
 vice-president actually held a scholarship there/' 
 
 “ I shall come," she said, smiling and holding out her hand 
 frankly, “ and listen . I thank you sincerely/' 
 
 On my way down I put my head in at the kitchen. 
 
 “ Don't worry about that picture, Mrs. Bolton," said I. 44 She's 
 a nice girl, and she'll put it back of her own accord." 
 
 She did. 
 
Chapter II 
 
 I WENT straight on from this interview to the Travers's, and 
 asked for Barbara* 
 
 The maid favoured me with the information that she was out 
 playing golf with Captain Blake, whom she defined as a gentleman; 
 but otherwise she had nothing to say except that they'd certainly 
 be in to tea, so I said I'd go up and wait* 
 
 I entered the drawing-room, and there, to my amazement, was 
 Reggie Orwylstree* 
 
 44 Hullo, Reggie," said I* 44 I've just been talking about you*" 
 
 44 Thank you," said he , 44 for your kind words* Where's Barbara ?" 
 “ Playing golf," said I, “ with Captain Blake*" 
 
 44 What's he ?" said Reggie* 
 
 “ A gentleman," I said* 44 I'm quoting Elspeth, who vouches 
 for the fact*" 
 
 He growled* 
 
 44 They'll be in to tea," I hastened to assure him ; 44 and, if I may 
 ask, what are you doing here ?" 
 
 “ Staying a few days," said he, vaguely* 44 Meant to look you 
 up a bit later*" 
 
 44 I should hope so* But why didn't I know anything about your 
 coming ?" 
 
 44 Only settled a day or two ago* Met Barbara in London* I — er, 
 just rolled into the Oratory to see if there were any of the fellows 
 about and " 
 
 “ I trust," said I, 44 you all had a pleasant and profitable conver- 
 sation*" 
 
 44 Oh yes," said he serenely* 44 I saw old Barlow, and Teddy 
 Fitzjames, and that awful little blighter, Shooten, and one or two 
 others; but when I was — er, plunged in prayer* someone came up 
 and slogged me over the head with a missal, and it was Barbara* 
 She insisted on my coming down to stay for a couple of days, and 
 I caught an earlier train than I'd expected, and here I am*" 
 
 44 How nice of her l" 
 
 44 But what about this Blake ?" 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 7 
 
 44 He's a young man/' said I, “ of lofty views, wide experience, 
 and prepossessing air*" 
 
 44 I thought you didn't know him*" 
 
 44 I don't* But we ought to think him that till we know the con- 
 trary, especially since he's playing golf with Barbara*" 
 
 But at this moment Barbara came in, followed by a pleasant youth 
 whom I'd not seen before* 
 
 She welcomed Reggie, said she was glad he'd managed to come 
 early, that she was sorry she'd been out, and introduced Captain 
 Blake* 
 
 The two young men grunted at each other, and remained like 
 highly-dignified icebergs which had happened to collide, but never 
 intended to let it occur again* 
 
 Tea appeared* 
 
 44 You know, it was such luck my meeting Reggie," said Barbara, 
 
 as she poured out* 44 I was saying my prayers in the Oratory " 
 
 “ When he came up and hit you over the head with a missal," I 
 murmured* 
 
 44 He did no such thing I" she indignantly cried* 44 But I heard 
 someone coughing and growling so desperately behind me, that I 
 had to look round, and there was Reggie*" 
 
 44 And you asked him down ?" 
 
 “ Well, he said he was running down to see you," she said , 44 and 
 wondered if we could put him up*" 
 
 44 How nice of him !" said I, contemplating Reginald* 44 But why 
 on earth," I added, “ people should come by earlier trains than they 
 arrange, I can't imagine*" 
 
 44 How rude you are l" she cried* 44 To see some more of me, of 
 course*" 
 
 “ I only said that to give him the chance of saying so himself," 
 said I; 44 but," I continued to Captain Blake, 44 Captain Orwylstree 
 cherishes such a devotion to the exact truth that- — 
 
 “ Here I say you know by Jove l" ejaculated Reggie, all in a 
 breath. 
 
 But at this moment old Mr* Travers came in, and saved the 
 situation, which was beginning to bewilder Captain Blake* 
 
 I told him I had been getting a room for Sergeant Raikes, and 
 how relieved I was he v/as equipped with a job* It was a desperate 
 business; even Wilchurch was full of out-of-works; and when men 
 like Raikes, who could never really do a full day, were out of luck, 
 getting in again seemed really at times impossible* 
 
8 
 
 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 44 So the present arrangement/' said I, 44 is ideal/' 
 
 44 I'm getting an old fellow/' said he, 44 and a drag on Barbara. 
 We need a man in the house, and he and Elspeth and old Mrs. 
 Evans ought to do the work well, and yet not have too much of it." 
 
 44 Have you heard of any of the others ?" asked Barbara. 
 
 44 Well, Hallinan's gone home to Australia, as you know; as for 
 the Corporal, I've not had a letter from him for ages; but he hates 
 writing, anyhow. The last I heard of him he was a sort of porter 
 in a cinema, but he won't do that long. His ideal is a pub." 
 
 I mentioned one or two other names. But the whole subject of 
 jobs was apt to make me despondent. 
 
 44 It's no consolation," said Mr. Travers , 44 to be told the country's 
 out of gear, and can't help being so for some time yet. As things go, 
 I don't see how it's to get in gear again." 
 
 44 You're a pessimist, sir," said Reggie. 
 
 44 I'm old, and I don't want revolutions, but I shouldn't like to see 
 it in the old sort of gear again. But I can't see that all these gentle- 
 men who talk about reconstruction have got so much as a real 
 principle between them. Least of all the Cathedral, though the 
 Dean's a man of good will; in fact, they mostly are." 
 
 44 What about the Morris Institute ?" I asked. 
 
 44 I don't like it," he said. 44 Frankly, I don't. But you know 
 more about it than I do. No. We look to the Guild, Father ! 
 The country'll never prosper till it gets God back." 
 
 Captain Blake looked so aghast at the mention of God in a drawing- 
 room that it became clear he wasn't a Catholic. 
 
 I shifted across and sat down next to him. 
 
 44 Are you billeted in Wilchurch ?" I said. 44 Or d'you live 
 here ? I'm afraid I practically know no one in the town." 
 
 44 We live at Hanton," he said. 44 But I've got a job on this 
 unemployment stunt at the Town Hall. It's the Government 
 department. Nothing directly to do with the army. But most of 
 the pensioners still in hospital come through my hands. So if you're 
 interested in that sort of thing I might be of some use." 
 
 He spoke rather stiffly, but was polite. 
 
 44 I'm delighted to hear it," I said. 44 It'll probably be a great 
 help. D'you find the men know what they want ?" 
 
 44 A minority does," he said. 44 Most of 'em have no idea where 
 they are. A lot, especially from hospital, of course, can't go back 
 to their old sort of job, d'you see, and ten to one when you've got 
 'em a billet they won't stick to it." 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 9 
 
 “ Restless ?" 
 
 44 That's right. After-war nerves. Can't settle down." 
 
 44 But they'd like to, d'you think ? I mean, they've got the idea 
 of working ♦ . . ?" 
 
 “ They're like most of us," said he, with a short laugh. 44 Got 
 to do something, but want to do as little as possible for as much as 
 possible. Don't blame 'em. But lots of them can go on strike, 
 lucky devils; we can't !" 
 
 44 You don't think they combine the notions of fair pay and fair 
 work ?" 
 
 44 Tell you the truth," said he, 44 human nature's the same 
 everywhere. Get all you can, and have a good time while you've 
 got it." 
 
 “ Well, perhaps I believe more in human nature than that. As 
 Mr. Travers says, human nature needs principles to govern itself 
 with; but it's good stuff in itself !" 
 
 44 Oh, it's all right, I expect," said he, vaguely. 
 
 “ It's magnificent stuff," I said, more emphatically; “ and even 
 if they do try to get what they can, they haven't got a lot, anyway, 
 and they help one another out of it more than — well, most of us. 
 On the whole, there's more sharing," said I, thinking of Miss Silver, 
 44 among the folks who've not got much to share, than among the 
 moneyed classes." 
 
 44 He's a frightful socialist," said Barbara. 
 
 44 Beneath his meek and mild exterior," said Reggie, at a great 
 pace, and fully determined to pay me out at all costs , 44 he conceals 
 the most red and revolutionary sentiments." 
 
 44 No but I say look here by Jove 1" said I, and Captain Blake 
 gasped. 
 
 “ Anyway, let's meet," I went on. “ You might come round 
 sometime and have a bad cigarette. I want to know how the Town 
 Hall stunt really works." 
 
 44 Thanks very much," said he. 44 Miss Travers has very kindly 
 asked me to look in whenever I like, and I hope to be round a lot." 
 
 " What the Corporal wants," said Barbara, at the most amazing 
 tangent, 44 is to marry. A Catholic girl. That would be a mixed 
 marriage one really could approve of." 
 
 Everyone looked rather blank. 
 
 44 1 mean," she said, 44 a good Catholic girl would keep him in 
 order; and he's such a nice man that he'd never break the promises, 
 and he'd probably end happily himself." 
 
10 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 44 I've known very few mixed marriages/' said her father, “ that 
 have worked out well." 
 
 44 I hate 'em," said Reggie, with emphasis. 
 
 Then he felt awkward, because of Captain Blake. 
 
 “ Mind you," said he to him, “ I'm not saying a word against — 
 er, anybody; but — well. I'm sure you'll agree with me that it's very 
 much better that — well, it's pretty awful if the parents don't agree 
 about the things that really matter, y'know; and then the kiddies 
 and — well, there you are, y'know," he broke off rather abruptly. 
 
 44 Still," said Captain Blake, feeling rather at a loss, “ I suppose 
 both sides would — I mean there'd be give and take, wouldn't there ? 
 and you could agree not to mention religion. . ♦ ." 
 
 4 * You could ," said Reggie, so grimly that Barbara laughed and 
 went off at another tangent so successfully that I renewed my 
 homage to her calm skill and talked about nothing in particular till 
 Blake got up to go. 
 
 I got up with him. 
 
 “ Are you going back to the Town Hall ?" I asked. 44 Because if 
 so we might go together as far as Curfew Corner, and I can show you 
 how to get to our house." 
 
 44 Thanks very much," said he, and we went out. 
 
 “ How did you meet the Travers's ?" I asked, when we got 
 outside. 
 
 “ Playing golf," said he. 44 Miss Travers was there with a fellow 
 I knew and his sister, and they suggested a foursome. D'you know 
 them well ?" 
 
 44 Her brother was a great friend of mine: he got killed quite 
 early on." 
 
 44 Fine chap, from all accounts." 
 
 “ One of the best," I said , 44 and the best of those." 
 
 44 They were always the ones to get knocked out." 
 
 “ He was a little like Captain Orwylstree; but a bit more brilliant. 
 I don't mean clever, exactly, though they are a clever family. But 
 — radiant, somehow ♦ . ♦ In sidera sidereus . . . ." 
 
 44 That their motto ?" 
 
 “ No. But it might have been his. . . . Anyhow, how d'you 
 like Orwylstree ?" 
 
 44 Bit of a fanatic, isn't he ?" 
 
 44 A fanatic ?" I laughed. 44 It's the first time I've heard him 
 called that. What makes you think so ?" 
 
 “ Well, he sort of lashed out about marriages. But I suppose I 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES n 
 
 can't expect you to agree with me, padre ! Still, Miss Travers did 
 give him a bit of a snub, what ?" 
 
 44 A snub ?" 
 
 44 Changed the subject rather abruptly, didn't she ?" 
 
 44 Oh well, that might have been for your sake." 
 
 44 My sake ?" 
 
 44 Well, there's no obligation on you to think the same as we do 
 about mixed marriages." 
 
 44 But I suppose even R.C.'s aren't all the same way of thinking 
 about that sort of thing ?" 
 
 44 When it's a question of faith, we don't have personal opinions 
 at all. We believe, and we all believe exactly the same thing. In 
 a question like mixed marriages we all know they're allowed, but in 
 that house you won't find anyone that likes them." 
 
 44 I should think Miss Travers was pretty broad-minded ?" 
 
 44 She is; but not lax-minded. And if you ask me, I think she 
 expected she'd conveyed to you her views on mixed marriages a 
 moment before." 
 
 I was rather alarmed at saying this, because all things considered, 
 it was rather cheek. Still, I thought that as he clearly hadn't taken 
 her hint, he might take mine. 
 
 However, we'd reached the corner. 
 
 44 Look here, padre," said he. 44 I can take you at your word, 
 can I, and come round some evening ? There might be one or two 
 things I'd like to ask you about." 
 
 44 Of course," said I. 44 Send a postcard a day or two ahead, that's 
 all. And don't think Reggie Orwylstree's a fanatic. He's quite a 
 good sort, really." 
 
 44 Right-o," he said; and we parted. 
 
Chapter III 
 
 T HE very next night I called on Miss Silver to escort her round 
 to the Leo Club, where a meeting was to take place which I 
 was sure would interest her* 
 
 She was very excited, and foresaw good copy for the Bugle. 
 
 44 I shall be very shy ! " she exclaimed, as we proceeded* “ I 
 shall be quite terrified ! I've never had anything to do with your 
 people, you know; and two girls from Hereford who came to cocoa 
 last night were quite furious with me for consenting to come at all, 
 because they're sure you're so dreadfully reactionary and they're 
 convinced I shall fall a victim to the glamour of Rome*" 
 
 44 There isn't much glamour about the Leo Club," said I* 
 
 44 That's just it l It's all so terribly puzzling* They say it all 
 looks so simple and above-board, and all the while there's something 
 underneath which captures you before you know where you are 1 
 They say Roman priests are so plausible — oh dear ! I quite forgot 
 I was talking to you /" 
 
 44 Never mind," said I* 44 I'm quite used to it* But if only 
 people wouldn't suppose priests to be benighted idiots and also the 
 subtlest of diplomats, it would simplify matters* I'm always sorry 
 for folks who have to imagine that the Church is such a lot of con- 
 tradictory things*" 
 
 44 Well, anyhow. I'm sure you'll not ask me to do anything I 
 oughtn't to* You know I've never even seen your ceremonies, and 
 I shan't know how to behave ! You know I couldn't take holy 
 water ! It wouldn't be — true l" 
 
 44 The nearest you'll get," said I, “ to holy water will be highly 
 respectable tea* If they don't forget to make it* And for your 
 bread of iniquity, biscuits, perhaps, with luck*" 
 
 44 Oh, are you so condescending to human frailty as to have tea ? 
 How splendid ! I'm sure we shall make friends over tea*" 
 
 “ Listen," I said* " I'll tell you who'll be there* There'll be 
 Father Fawkham* He's a sort of chaplain for the whole thing here* 
 He knows a lot about it* It's not my department at all, really, 
 
 12 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 13 
 
 though it stands to reason I see how deadly important it is, and Fm 
 all for it. Then there'll be Mr. Winterton, who's the lay head of 
 this particular branch; and Mr. O'Hara, that's the secretary; and 
 we've got two men staying with us from High Green in Lancashire, 
 who'll contribute no end of solid sense and energy; and " 
 
 44 Will they all be men ?" she asked anxiously. 
 
 44 Well, I expect there'll be Miss Longfield and Mrs. Ash, of the 
 Catholic Women's League, and probably Miss Poole, who's a very 
 well-known school-teacher here — in fact, she represents the women 
 teachers on all educational things in Wilchurch. . . ." 
 
 44 But I thought Roman Catholics took no interest in education 1" 
 
 I remained silent. 
 
 44 And there are Catholic Feminists ?" she enquired in quite a 
 deprecating voice. 
 
 44 1 will show you a small textbook — at least, it serves very well 
 as a textbook, called Christian Feminism said I. 44 It's true that 
 in some ways Catholic Feminism doesn't flourish, or hasn't till 
 lately, as well as it did in the thirteenth century " 
 
 44 The dear quaint Middle Ages !" she exclaimed. 44 Of course, 
 you'd be able to tell me about them. But " 
 
 44 1 will” said I. 44 Make no mistake about it. Where d'you 
 put the date of the Renaissance ?" 
 
 44 Ah l" she said, 44 the Renaissance," and she looked yearningly 
 before her. But all she saw were the v/indows of the 6Jd. bazaar, 
 and they failed to inspire either her or me. So I broke off. 
 
 44 I'll just tell you in a few words," said 1 , 44 what's going to happen 
 to-night. For some time we've had here in Leo House what we 
 call preliminary study-classes. No doubt you'll hear a sort of 
 account of what they've achieved. But now we are inaugurating a 
 proper Study-Circle, or Club, as it's called." 
 
 44 Oh, I know all about those," she interrupted. 44 We have one 
 in Bidmoor, where I live. In fact, I think I was partly responsible 
 in getting it up. I love to hope . ♦ ." she again peered wistfully 
 into the gloom. But this time she only saw the Conservative Club, 
 with Canon Chawner and Colonel Warbur ton-Smith seated near 
 the window, and this again disheartened her. 
 
 44 May I ask how you work it ?" I said. 
 
 44 Well, of course, we meet " she began. 
 
 44 Who's we ?" 
 
 44 Oh, a little group . People who think — who feel there's so much 
 to do. . . ." 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 i4 
 
 “ Yes; but all educated people ?" 
 
 She hesitated a little. 
 
 “ Well, we're most anxious to have the workers, of course ! We 
 feel we aren't complete without them. I'm always urging it. But 
 it's so difficult 1 Sometimes we've had one or two; but they don't 
 stick to it; and they're so hard to elevate . We talk to them, of 
 course " 
 
 44 Ah. Yes. What about ?" 
 
 44 Well, we have one member who's very well up in all modern 
 problems; and he reads papers on alcohol and eugenics and so on, 
 and it's most instructive and valuable. But I daresay most of us 
 find it hard to keep abreast, though we try, and read and discuss. . . . 
 But we do seek to introduce a little colour into those grey lives, a little 
 sense of the Divine . . . the Beyond. Dante 1 Athens ! Old 
 legends from Egypt and the East ... all that can show the Spirit 
 of Man struggling and striving and reaching ever upwards. ♦ . 
 
 44 In short," I said, 44 you form a group that has lectures, I sup- 
 pose; and from time to time debates ?" 
 
 44 Oh yes; debates, of course. We had a splendid one last session 
 on — Which came first. Thought or Language ?" 
 
 44 Which did you decide ?" 
 
 44 Oh, language, of course ♦ . ♦ . And we know all about Evolu- 
 tion, I needn't say." 
 
 44 Lucky people. But I'd like to say at once our Study Clubs 
 are not , first. Lecture Clubs. Not even clubs where courses of 
 lectures are given; still less isolated lectures, Dante, Evolution, and 
 so on. Not even clubs, where the lectures are given by the members 
 themselves; still less clubs where they're just talked to ♦ Nor yet 
 debating clubs, nor yet what they call Instruction Classes, which the 
 Cathedral's very keen on here. The Cathedral Clergy take a book 
 and read it aloud to their audience and sometimes discuss what 
 they've read after the tea-interval. ... All these things are ex- 
 cellent, no doubt; in fact, they all exist in our Catholic parish here; 
 but they aren't what we mean by Study Clubs' ' 
 
 44 But what are they, then ?" 
 
 44 1 expect you'll hear it put pretty plainly to-night. Anyway, 
 we'll be there in a minute." 
 
 We ascended the spiral staircase of the 4 oldest house in Wilchurch,' 
 and entered the circular room where we had our meetings. The 
 building was really part of an old tower-chapel which joined on to 
 the city walls, and for the time being we occupied it. Above this 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 15 
 
 room was the library, and a sort of reading-room, and the C*S*G* 
 offices* 
 
 Except for a crucifix and a very old stone statue of Our Lady, 
 and a portrait of Leo XIII*, the room was unadorned; not more than 
 a dozen persons were present; the only lady, after all, was Mrs* 
 Ash* I rapidly introduced Miss Silver, and Mrs* Ash, true to her 
 sex's power of intuition, instantly grasped the situation* She 
 executed a sort of mental enveloping movement, so that Miss Silver, 
 while being made to feel quite happy and at home, also began to 
 feel like a little school-girl, and sat as still as a mouse* A contented 
 school-girl ! Happy Miss Silver ! I had always admired Mrs* Ash* 
 
 After the preliminary odds and ends of business, Mr* Winterton 
 made a statement* The study-class which had existed now for 
 five years was still to exist; but something more was needed if Wil- 
 church Catholics were to be able to hold their own, and more than 
 that, to lead in local affairs* The class had followed the usual 
 procedure* It had taken for its last textbook Christian Citizenship , 
 and the four chapters had provided material for no less than sixteen 
 lessons* The director, whose role had usually been filled by Father 
 Fawkham, had first read out as much of each chapter — sometimes 
 no more than one section — as he thought the class could assimilate; 
 explained its more important points, and was then questioned by 
 the class, which numbered about fifteen or eighteen members* 
 During the following week the members discussed or thought about 
 what they had heard, and arrived primed with further questions at 
 the next meeting* There had been three outside lecturers, and 
 one lecture from the Director himself* The choice of the outside 
 speakers had been rather bold* The class had invited Canon 
 Peabody, a well-known Greek scholar, to describe the main lines 
 followed by Greek civilization; Professor Burden had explained the 
 chief contributions made by the Roman Empire towards the creation 
 of Europe; and no less a person than the Rabbi of the Peckley 
 Synagogue had given the Jewish view of the structure of Old Testa- 
 ment life* A vigorous discussion followed each of these lectures, 
 especially the last* Father Fawkham's lecture showed how modern 
 civilization was unintelligible apart from a general knowledge of 
 these ancient civilizations, the Hebrew, the Greek, and the Roman, 
 without which it would never be existing at all* No more was 
 aimed at than a bird's-eye view; but it was wished to enlarge horizons, 
 to enrich imaginations, to unparochialize the ideas of the students, 
 and to show them how much deeper the roots of modern problems 
 
16 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 struck than into merely modern soil. Besides this, the class had 
 made a tour of Wilchurch under the care of the Dean of the Cathe- 
 dral, and Miss Imelda Smith had afterwards written an essay, showing 
 the social bearing of many of the facts the Dean had told them about 
 the ancient buildings, monastic and educational, of the place. So 
 good work had been done. But though the class was to continue, 
 it was felt that a more complete and scientific study of narrower 
 problems must be made possible for a smaller group who should have 
 both time and wish to apply their brains to them; and that was why 
 a Study Club was to be inaugurated. Since the idea was new to 
 Wilchurch he asked Father Fawkham to explain what had been 
 done elsewhere. 
 
 44 But this is frightfully serious/' whispered Miss Silver. 
 
 u Of course," said I. 44 So's life," I added sententiously. 
 
 She sighed. 
 
 44 It makes me feel so terribly amateur I" 
 
 “ We ail started as amateurs. I'm nothing else now. But these 
 northerners aren't. And the Study-Club won't be. Father Fawk- 
 ham's beginning. . . ." 
 
 44 We've done very well, so far," said Father Fawkham rapidly. 
 “ We've got to do better still. We're going to try to be as good at 
 Wilchurch as they are at Preston and Rochdale and Oldham. We're 
 going to get a move on right now. A study club has been suggested, 
 and we mean to have it. Mr. Holden from High Green will probably 
 have something to tell us of what they're doing there. Mr. Holden, as 
 you know, is a real live wire, and we want to get some of his current 
 through to zzs." 
 
 At this point the bull-dog, who always attended these meetings, 
 snapped at a moth. 
 
 44 Be quiet. Bill," said Father Fawkham. 44 But I expect that's 
 a hint to us to get to business. And we're only a few here, but that's 
 as it should be. A Study Club ought to be a few only. Sound 
 brains, real keenness, and above all, perseverance is what's needed. 
 Sound brains, because we don't want brilliance or epigram, but we 
 do want solid intelligent work. However, more people can do that 
 than think they can. Keenness means that members will give a 
 good deal of time, even after their hard day's work, to the business 
 of the club. And perseverance, because there are bound to be dull 
 tracts. Heavy going. Statistics aren't romantic, and there'll be 
 plenty of them. Now, lots of men with excellent heads and plenty 
 of keenness still can't afford the time or are honestly too tired at 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 17 
 
 the end of the day, to come here or to write essays at home. So 
 it's no reproach to them if they don't belong. They'll come to the 
 class. They'll go to the Lectures and Debates at the Parish Hall. 
 They'll belong to the C.Y.M.S. or the S.V.P. and do good work 
 there. But in the club we want regular attendance and the other 
 qualifications I've mentioned. So we're starting with seven: Mr. 
 Winterton, Mr. O'Hara, Mr. Edward Jones, and Mr. John Jones, 
 Mrs. Ash, and Miss Longfield, and Mr. Atherton, though he's not 
 yet a Catholic. Now, in this town it's really wages that are the most 
 pressing problem; that and housing. On the whole, I think we 
 can manage a successful attack on both these problems this session 
 and next. For textbooks we propose to have J. A. Ryan's Living 
 Wage to start with; and," said he for the sake of Miss Silver, whose 
 presence he intermittently remembered, “ a list of books on the 
 subject, with a brief criticism pointing out their leading points and 
 main defects will be posted on the notice-board, and all of them can 
 be consulted in the library upstairs. I should like to make it clear 
 that I'm not springing these topics, out of the many possible ones, 
 upon our members, because we've discussed this club very thor- 
 oughly together, haven't we ? and this really is an inauguration and 
 not just one more preliminary meeting. Very well. Next week 
 we start on Ryan. Mr. O'Hara will read a section, which we shall 
 discuss, taking principles rather than details, and certain questions 
 will be set, to which every member has to write answers during the 
 week . Now, that's never got to be left out. This is where the perse- 
 verance comes in. A question needn't be answered at great length; 
 a quite short answer, even a line or two, will do; but there must he 
 an answer. Just one point to be made clear right now. Never put 
 down one word you aren't sure you mean. No talk . No frills. 
 Hard business every time. If you don't know what to say, say that. 
 Sooner than have to say that, you'll hunt up some member of the 
 club and thrash it out with him before the next meeting. If your 
 opinion doesn't coincide with his, so much the better. If we all 
 agree, we'll have no discussion. And you'll probably find your 
 practical opinions differ because you aren't clear about your prin- 
 ciples. Very well. At the next meeting the answers are read out. 
 Since we're so few, we shall probably all have time to read our 
 answers. If we haven't, we'll take turns or postpone the reading 
 of the others till next time. It's often a very good thing to come 
 back a step or two, and see what we think of our answers a time or 
 two ago, after we've studied a bit farther. So keep your answers. 
 
 2 
 
i8 
 
 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 Have a regular connected set of documents at the end of the course. 
 Then re-read them and see how you've developed. I daresay if Mr. 
 Winterton has time he'd be willing to take the papers home and 
 mark 'em. I may say we're very lucky to have Mr. Winterton for 
 leader of our club. You know him, and you know he knows his 
 job. He won't do all the talking by any means. He'll direct our 
 talking. He'll add evidence from other quarters to what we can 
 pick up, and he'll illustrate conditions in Wilchurch by conditions 
 elsewhere. On and off we'll have special stunts. I may say that 
 we'll be on delicate ground, because a lot of important people in 
 this town aren't likely to see eye to eye with us in all our conclusions* 
 But we've got good backers. The Dean of the Cathedral is very 
 sympathetic, and you probably know that one of the Cathedral 
 choristers has written an excellent little monograph on the jam 
 industry, started by the late Mayor, you know. He wrote it imme- 
 diately under the Dean's protection. It made rather a sensation, 
 especially when the Sunday after its publication there was a Cathedral 
 anthem which said : 4 In our gates is every kind of apple, new and 
 old. . . .' and the author had to sing the solo. The Mayor's three 
 nieces became High Church on the strength of it, and attend St. 
 Titus's ever since, though they always used to turn up their noses 
 at incense. . . ♦" 
 
 “'So would anyone," said Mrs. Ash, who was a convert , 44 at that 
 incense. ♦ . ." 
 
 This broke up the meeting for a while, and to her regret Mrs. 
 Ash departed, having an appointment. This left Miss Silver the 
 only lady present, and she was unanimously elected to make the 
 tea, which she did with much eclat, heating the tea-pot first, 
 which we should never have remembered to do, and altogether 
 coming in for a lot of attention, which cheered her rather drooping 
 spirits. 
 
 After the tea Father Fawkham asked Mr. Holden to speak. He 
 stood up, squared his shoulders and began: 
 
 44 Reverend Fathers, Lady and Gentlemen " (Miss Silver quivered 
 all over with delight ), 44 Mr. Winterton has told us about the study- 
 class you've been having, and Father Fawkham has told us about 
 the study-circle you're going to have, and it was grand to hear what 
 you've done and what you hope to do, and may you do it. But I've 
 a word I want to say upon this subject, and this is it. The study- 
 class had for its textbook Christian Citizenship ♦ That means it 
 believes in Jesus Christ, and, of course, it does; so do all of us, those 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 19 
 
 that's here* And the study-club is going to discuss wages and 
 housing, and from what I know of the way discussions on those 
 subjects go you'll be talking of the right given to all men by God 
 to lead a decent life in decent surroundings* That means you believe 
 in God and you intend to examine what's God's views are on wages ; 
 what God's got to say on housing* Well, you'll come to certain 
 conclusions, and unless you want to remain shut up in this ancient 
 old tower, you've got to go out to Wilchurch an' say: * This is what 
 we think right and wrong on these subjects, and this is what we 
 consider is God's law on the matter, and this is what we ought to do 
 as Christians*' Now, ladies and gentlemen," said he, warming to 
 it, 44 that's all very well for the Dean and his young choristers and 
 the ladies of St* Titus's and the respectable folk of this old town, and 
 the steady, chapel-going folks and the people who get their names 
 down as patrons of your concerts and your theatricals and your 
 hospital-fetes and what not* They're all Christians, or think they 
 are* They all believe in God, or say they do* But whether they 
 really do or don't — and there's a big query mark to that, if you ask 
 my opinion — I'll lay you what money you like that the majority 
 of the folks that gets the wages and has to live in the houses don't; 
 and them as gets at them don't, not even theoretically* Who do I 
 mean ? Why, the Tolstoi Tribunal that I've been visiting; and the 
 most at the Morris Institute, as Mr* Winterton'll be the first to 
 acknowledge; and now I'll go back and say right out that the Church 
 folks and the concert patrons don't either, the most often, let them 
 say what they will, and even think it* But I'm not talking about 
 them so much as the real leaders that affect the mass of the people 
 even here; they know they don't, and it's no good your starting on 
 what ought or oughtn't to be, bringing in God and Jesus Christ with 
 them* The half of the time they'll deny your premises even if they 
 accept your conclusions* I've been about a bit these last three days 
 in the various pubs*, which is just what you reverend gentlemen 
 can't do, though I'm not suggesting that Father Fawkham and the 
 other reverend Father don't know the sort of thing that's said there* 
 But I say that in this sleepy old town, same as in the big ones, you'll 
 hear the truths of Christianity, as Catholics hold them, out and out 
 denied by the ordinary working man, because, though in his heart he 
 wants to believe and in a way does, the leaders he listens to don't 
 believe and don't want him to* And he repeats them, and him and 
 his friends they accustom one another to hearing that sort of talk, 
 and more than ever since the war; and men have got more darin' in 
 
20 
 
 MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 what they say and more sick with the whole bundle of tricks that 
 made up the so-called civilization which landed them in the war* 
 So what I say, and what I go nowhere without I hear my friends 
 say, is, we want to be taught how to defend these very principles 
 Father Fawkham was alluding to, that there's a God; that He 
 matters; that Jesus Christ isn't just a name nor yet wasn't a mere 
 dreamer that's kept things back rather than the opposite; and that 
 the New Testament's to be trusted and has things to tell us right 
 here about these very problems that we think is so modern* So 
 I say you want, and we want, and we all want regular Catholic 
 instruction in things like: Why I believe in God, why I believe in 
 Jesus Christ, and not only why I believe in indulgences and why 
 I'm not a fool for taking holy water* We want 44 apologetic " 
 clubs, though I hate the name, we not having to apologize for any- 
 thing, but it's the official word and we understand it here at all 
 events* And I daresay I've been none too helpful about your new 
 club, seeing as I've only saddled you with a new job on top of it* But 
 that's my own opinion and it's more than that, for you'll find never 
 a priest in the north, or few enough, whom I'm not repeating the 
 words of* But the priests themselves need to be reminded of it 
 by men like us who see the world now and again from a different 
 angle like* And I'll not regret having come from High Green — 
 well, not for many reasons; but I'll not regret it if I've made that 
 point clear* Underneath all your club and class discussions is 
 God and Jesus Christ, and it's over them that the battle's to be 
 fought in the long run, and may God forgive us if we can't fight it, 
 fo* besides us Catholics there'll soon enough be never a man 
 who can*" 
 
 He sat down* 
 
 Very little was said after that, save by way of brief agreement* 
 An immense solemnity seemed to invade the little room; the august 
 names that had been mentioned w r ere no new thing there; they 
 belonged to it, or rather, it to them* In the massive walls of the old 
 fortress-chapel the Catholic civilization of underlying centuries beat 
 like a heart; the Faith thrilled like a soul; the very stones cried out 
 and chanted their unchanged Credo ♦ The strong virility of the 
 Lancashire lad, his robust voice, his direct grasp upon the very 
 innermost of the matter, were part and parcel of a mighty Life* 
 Life had throbbed here strongly; here men had fought, died, sinned, 
 repented, prayed* Here still must they so do, drawing the same 
 life from the same source* The same Crucifix spread wide its 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 21 
 
 arms; from the same pierced human heart still sprang the divine 
 vitality* It seemed natural that before we separated, we should 
 kneel, and repeat Our Father , and the I Believe, and, looking 
 to the ancient statue of the Virgin Mother, the immemorial Hail 
 Mary * 
 
 We went out into the starlit town* I walked with Miss Silver 
 and allowed the others who were going our way to get somewhat 
 ahead* Miss Silver was very silent* 
 
 After a while I asked her if she'd liked it* 
 
 “ I — I don't know," she said* ** It was all so different * * * from 
 what I'm used to, and from what I'd expected* I can't say what I 
 mean* Looking back it all feels so — so aneemic, what we used to do* 
 I shall never dare to write to the papers again* I feel I've been — 
 frivolous* Yet I thought I was in earnest* And now I shan't know 
 what to do*" 
 
 She searched for her handkerchief and dabbed her eyes* 
 
 “ Oh, but you mustn't give up," I cried* 44 You've seen nothing 
 whatever to make you want to do that 1 Surely, just the opposite* 
 No, no ! There's ever so much in which we can co-operate * ♦ ♦ 
 we could correspond * * *" 
 
 44 Oh, but you surely wouldn't think that worth your 
 while ?" 
 
 44 Of course we would ! Good heavens 1 we're not conceited* 
 We're learning * We're struggling frightfully hard, with our lack 
 of knowledge, our lack of interest, our poverty, our lack of men and 
 women who care * * * * We want every kind of co-operation and 
 fellowship we possibly can have*" 
 
 “ But could you, as Roman Catholics, have anything to do with 
 me ? Because — well, I never thought I'd feel just what I am 
 feeling now; but I'm not any nearer believing in your faith. I'm 
 afraid, and " 
 
 “ You believe in God, and in the brotherhood of men through 
 Jesus Christ ?" 
 
 44 I don't know that I do !" she said rather piteously* 
 44 I've talked a lot * * * I've — oh well, you know the way we 
 talk — about modern times, and restatement of old ideas and — 
 oh, but it does seem so unreal when I see a man like Mr* Holden — 
 so unhesitating, so open-eyed too — oh dear, I don't know any - 
 thing /" 
 
 She was an impulsive girl, and I thought her despondency might 
 be less heavy on the next day; so I just promised we'd keep in touch, 
 
22 
 
 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 and would send her our literature and would like to know what she 
 was doing, and after a while we said good-night. 
 
 44 Thank you so much/' she said. 44 I don't believe I shall forget 
 it all. I'm sure I've been helped." 
 
 44 We've shared /" said I, smiling. 
 
 44 Oh, don't /" she cried, and ran down the little passage which 
 led to Mrs. Bolton's. 
 
Chapter IV 
 
 A LITTLE while after this Miss Silver invited me to tea* I 
 found her alone, and rather anxious, for she had also invited 
 her two lady friends and Mr* Tuke of the Wilchurch Argus, 
 and she hadn't the least idea how we should fuse* Nor had I; and 
 I recommended ourselves to the benison of His Holiness, now 
 restored to his proper place above a massive sideboard* I trusted 
 I was not disrespectful in thinking I observed the tiniest flicker of 
 a smile at the corner of his lips* Anyhow, round his eyes were 
 amiable little crinkles* 
 
 Miss Elsie Newton and Miss Malfa Sykes came in, though it was 
 long before I discovered their Christian names, because these three 
 young ladies called one another stalwartly by their surnames until 
 a crisis of emotion re-feminized them* Miss Newton was down- 
 right and uncompromising, and Miss Sykes rather ecstatic and talked 
 almost entirely in capitals; but I liked them both, so far as I could 
 divert my attention from Mr* Tuke, who was very young and 
 frightened and felt far more at home with Mrs* Bolton than with 
 any of us* 
 
 4 * I don't know whether I ought to be sitting down to tea with 
 you at all,** said Miss Newton, very abruptly* 
 
 44 Am I a bad character ?" I asked* 
 
 44 I expect you're congratulating yourself on having captured 
 Silver ! No doubt your Church applauds you, but I can't say / 
 do*" 
 
 44 Are you captured, Miss Silver ?" said I* 
 
 “ She is not,** said Miss Newton* 44 I*ll see to that* But I — I 
 knew what you were up to* / saw*" 
 
 44 The Wilchurch Press," said Mr* Tuke, melodramatically, 44 is 
 his slave* Journals of both sides*" 
 
 “ The Power of the Press !" cried Miss Sykes, with nondescript 
 emotion* 
 
 “ Do I drive you hard ?" I asked* 
 
 “ More like coo," said he* 44 Coo, and we come* But ever since 
 
 23 
 
24 MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 that night you took down the Belgian gentleman's speech for us — 
 we not being able to take French/' he explained, 44 and got us copied 
 into every paper of the land, it's us for you*" 
 
 44 It's very kind of you," said I* 44 It was an amusing job* Did 
 you see that. Miss Newton ? Amazing incidents during the German 
 occupation of Belgium* Such headlines ! Jesuits in disguise* 
 Priestly Pimpernels* Clerics as carters, pastry-cooks, anything you 
 like*" 
 
 44 It was well known," she said, “ priests were pro-German* I 
 don't want to hear about it* What did they do ?" 
 
 44 Work in conjunction with Nurse Cavell," I replied* 44 Getting 
 wounded and maltreated prisoners out of Belgium into Holland, or 
 even England* And co-operate with the Admiralty in getting news 
 across about imminent air-raids*" 
 
 She looked a little blank* 
 
 44 But I don't think I've gone far towards capturing Miss Silver* 
 She's not even on parole*" 
 
 44 Well, she came back from your meeting absolutely hypnotized* 
 
 I don't know what she could have heard there* She said she'd 
 never seen anything like it*" 
 
 44 She could hardly speak about it, next day even !" said Miss 
 Sykes* “ She sat for hours telling us about it* The Northerner 1 
 The Earnest Priest — yet so human l And the Tea ! — And then 
 the Prayers ♦ ♦ ♦ I So old and strange l How glad I am I 
 wasn't there ! And yet * ♦ *" she looked doubtfully at Miss 
 Newton* 
 
 “ I really must say," I interrupted, 44 we're not extraordinary at 
 all* We know perfectly well that crowds of institutions, societies, 
 and w r hat not, of any colour or creed, are far better equipped than 
 we are* All we profess to have of special, is principles*" 
 
 44 But we are not unprincipled, please /" cried Miss Silver* 
 
 44 What are your principles ?" 
 
 44 Betterment /" sighed Miss Sykes* 44 The Betterment of the 
 Race — of fellow-sufferers*" 
 
 44 Excellent ! But how do you judge what's better and what's 
 worse ?" 
 
 44 A Fair Wage," said Miss Newton , 44 is obviously better than an 
 unfair one*" 
 
 44 Yes, but how d'you judge what's fair ? Equal shares all round ?" 
 
 44 Of course not*" 
 
 44 But aren't men equal ?" 
 
25 
 
 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 “ Yes. No. At least they ought to be/' 
 
 44 Why ? Does Nature give any hint of human equality ?" 
 
 44 No cake for anyone/' she said with determination, “ till there's 
 bread for all." 
 
 “ Ah. So you think everyone ought to have the chance of leading 
 a certain sort of life ?" 
 
 44 A human life," said Miss Silver, very sensibly. 
 
 44 And for that," said Miss Newton, “they must have more leisure 
 and more money." 
 
 44 Play-time/' breathed Miss Sykes; and Mr. Tuke, who liked 
 her very much, applauded. 
 
 44 But what," I said, 44 is a human life ? A luxurious life ? A 
 comfortable life ? Who's going to set the standard so that you'll 
 know when they've got enough money ? And what are they to be free 
 to do in playtime ? Just anything ? Lounge in a pub. ?" 
 
 44 Most certainly not. We shall take the drink question in hand 
 from the outset. And there we know we shall have the Romanists 
 against us." (Mr. Tuke winked at me.) 44 We shall start too, at 
 once, by educating ." 
 
 44 So it's not just material betterment you want ?" 
 
 44 Of course not." 
 
 “ Spiritual ?" 
 
 44 Soul- betterment," cried Miss Sykes. 
 
 44 But what's soul ?" 
 
 They all three began to speak at once, and subsided without saying 
 anything. 
 
 44 Let's say," said I, 44 they're to be taught to use their minds. 
 And regulate their emotions. But use them on what ? And regulate 
 them by whose rule ? Who's going to tell us what's true, so that 
 we can think it ? or what's good and beautiful, so that we can love 
 it ?" 
 
 Miss Sykes, somewhat embarrassed by the consciousness that 
 Mr. Tuke's eyes were earnestly fixed upon her, murmured that those 
 were mysteries. 
 
 44 But," I urged, 44 educators can't educate towards something of 
 which all they know is that it's a mystery. Some sort of truth and 
 right must be agreed upon. But by whom ?" 
 
 44 The State shall uphold the Ideal." 
 
 44 Any State ? Prussia ? China ? The Capitalist State ?" 
 
 44 Oh dear ! a right State, of course; the true State." 
 
 44 But how does one know when a State's right and true ? You 
 
26 
 
 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 wouldn't get Prussia or China or any Government to acknowledge 
 they were wrong and false/' 
 
 44 The Government isn't the State 1" 
 
 44 I agree. But what is ?'* 
 
 44 The mass of right-minded men and women, of course." 
 
 44 Oh dear ! But who's to decide who's right-minded ? How 
 d'you know ? Is the majority always the right-minded ?" 
 
 44 Alas, far from it. Else public opinion would long ago have 
 abolished our present horrible system." 
 
 “ Oh, an elite, then ? A favoured few ? A minority recognized 
 by themselves as right ? Yourselves, in short. But — most respect- 
 fully, who are you ? The State, anyway ! L'Etat c f est moi ♦ There 
 we are; back again, full circle, to Autocracy." 
 
 44 You're only arguing for the sake of arguing," said Miss Newton. 
 44 I ought to know better than to chop logic with a Roman casuist !" 
 
 44 Oh, Elsie 1” cried Miss Silver; so I found that out. 
 
 “ Forgive me," I said. 44 It was scarcely arguing. Probably I 
 should agree with you about half the things you want done. But I 
 don't think you're clear about why you want them done. I think I 
 am. And I have principles which tell me why, and show me a lot 
 more things to be done than even you, I fancy, want; and better 
 things, that go deeper; and I have stronger motives. It's no good 
 talking about progress till you're clear where you are, and where you 
 want to go; and what sort of creature you are. Else you may be 
 asking a wingless creature to fly, and to fly to the wrong place. And 
 don't talk about the Race, still less about posterity, nor self-sacrifice, 
 nor, again, self-determination, till you know what man is, what he's 
 meant for, and how he may hope to become it." 
 
 44 Ah ! You talk. We act /" 
 
 44 Listen ! We've got a few, perfectly clear principles, without 
 which, I consider, you can't safely act. Two sets, in fact, neither 
 of which will we give up. Into the first set the Church doesn't 
 enter at all. Isn't mentioned. Nor even Christianity. They are, 
 we consider, warranted by pure reason. Without them, you'll 
 merely act at random. We believe in the existence of God, who is 
 not the world, nor us. God is. Necessarily. And God is absolute. 
 An absolute authority. The whole ultimate well-being of the race 
 and the group and the individual comes about through obeying the 
 Divine law. All our duties are ultimately to God. For, that we 
 have intelligence to know Him sufficiently, and free will to adapt 
 ourselves to Him, we also hold as a principle. And again, that we are 
 
gOSTOlf COLLEGE LIBRARY 
 
 MR. FRANCIS NEW^RS'^ ¥J ' 27 
 
 unities made up both of body and spirit. And that spirit is immortal. 
 Therefore, that our duties and scope and goal are not limited to this 
 body-soul period of living, but extend beyond it. Therefore, that 
 not only material comfort, nor yet intellectual triumphs affecting 
 our condition here and now, nor even that of posterity, in earthly 
 conditions, will ultimately do for objective. Therefore, that all 
 reform and legislation ought to use at least those principles, and that 
 consequently only such as do will construct human life properly, 
 for each man, or for groups, or the race/' 
 
 “ That seems right ," said Miss Sykes, and Mr. Tuke thought so, 
 too. 
 
 44 Let him go on," said Miss Newton, magnificently. 
 
 44 There is a second group of principles which we are given by 
 what we call Revelation, and they are supernatural. Here certainly 
 Our Lord, through whom this unique revelation was given, comes 
 in, and so does the Church. But these I leave to one side, though 
 along of them chiefly, and better, we reach the knowledge of man's 
 true equality and fraternity and dignity. Now I say that all efforts 
 on behalf of man which don't flow from these principles, which 
 we boldly and logically apply in detail to each department, fall short 
 of what must be done if we are to succeed. And I say that on the 
 whole reformers neglect those principles. Our Guild studies these 
 in themselves and in their application; and in that alone, if you like, 
 it is better than many another such society, even if in all else it 
 might be worse, though I don't think it is so." 
 
 44 But you'll never," she said rather soberly, 44 get people at large 
 to believe in all that. I don't myself. I have to be much less 
 sure." 
 
 44 People did once !" I said, 44 and there was a coherent society. 
 And I'll tell you this," I added, not looking at Miss Sykes, 44 nine- 
 tenths of the neurasthenia and the mental instability of our times is 
 precisely due to lack of guiding Mie-principles ♦ A doctor said so to 
 me only yesterday; and I've always believed it." 
 
 44 But mental instability may be a good symptom I" she cried. 
 44 Crystallized errors ! To me, that is what your Church stands for. 
 Break up all these dreadful out-of-date conventions and creeds ! 
 Let thought be active and form itself ever anew 1" 
 
 44 To some extent that may be good. Superficial, untrue 
 formations, yes. They may be harmful. But unless a man, or 
 nation, has some absolutely valid fundamental primary convictions, 
 which are, in the long run, right ways of being, he's a mere flux, and 
 
28 
 
 MR, FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 the nation mere chaos. The same doctor said to me he didn't see 
 how a man, who really lived out his religious principles, could possibly 
 be neurasthenic. And I said that I'd often noticed that neuras- 
 thenic religious people were, at some point, not allowing them- 
 selves to carry out their innermost religious convictions, and were 
 accordingly in a state of deep-seated conflict, and downright 
 miserable," 
 
 44 He must have been a very odd doctor !" 
 
 44 Not so unusual as you'd think. Far more than they suppose, 
 even, but often consciously, doctors occupied with that department 
 are coming round to the Catholic doctrine of the soul, and to recog- 
 nize the inestimable value of Catholic principles and wishing they 
 were true," 
 
 “ I suppose you'd persuaded him," 
 
 44 Not at all. He'd not require it. He works in the very big 
 shell-shock and neuropathic hospital five miles from here; and as 
 he emphasized, these men can't get well, because they want to do some- 
 thing with life — they seek a purpose — and can't offer themselves one; 
 and they want a method to apply it to their existence in detail, and 
 don't know of one, 4 I,' he said, 4 can analyze, I can show them 
 where they're wrong, or what they lack; but it's for you, priests 
 especially, to put 'em together again, and reveal to them satisfactory 
 principles. For yours work. Only / can't honestly recommend 
 them. For I'm not sure,' / said, 4 Doctor, your method takes you 
 a long way. It shows we have a lot of primary and secondary 
 instincts which need governing and co-ordinating unless we're to 
 get in a mess. You own they can only be governed by ideas ♦ And 
 you own you oughtn't to suggest ideas you believe to be false, or, 
 may be false. And if the patient thinks the idea you're suggesting 
 is false, it won't work for him. It loses its dynamic value. For an 
 idea to work and go on working I've got to be convinced it's true. 
 So our whole job is, to find out ideas, governing ideas, which we can 
 be sure are true , If we can't we — and you in particular — may as well 
 throw up the sponge,' But there must be a way of finding out 
 truth , Well, let's make use of it," 
 
 44 What is the way ?" said Miss Sykes, 
 
 44 Ah ! we'd better not embark on that now, had v/e ?" 
 
 44 Pearls before swine, I suppose l" she sighed, 
 
 “ Oh, Malfa /" cried Miss Silver; so I found that out too. 
 
 44 Say rather, acorns before angels," I murmured, and bowing, got 
 up to go, I walked home with Mr. Tuke, and the conversation 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 29 
 
 gave him matter for a paragraph, off which he made half-a-crown, 
 and stood his pal a cinema* 
 
 ***** 
 
 After dinner Captain Blake called. 
 
 He was very timid, so I asked him if he'd like some coffee* He 
 refused, of course, but I insisted that it could easily be hotted up, 
 and I reflected it was sure to be so nasty that he'd have no time for 
 any other emotion, and would be normal when he'd finished his 
 cup* So I messed about with the coffee things till we'd got over 
 the first ten minutes; he then drank his, and became neutral; and 
 when he began to smoke he had all his courage, and took the plunge* 
 
 44 You said I might come and ask you a thing or two, padre," he 
 began* 
 
 44 Sure* You wanted an explanation about mixed marriages, 
 didn't you ?" 
 
 44 Well — I did. But I don't any more* I may as well tell you 
 I've decided to become an R*C*" 
 
 44 Oh* Why?" 
 
 44 Well, I daresay I'm not telling you anything when I say I'm 
 most awfully struck with Miss Travers; and though it would be a 
 bit of a gulp to become an R.C*, what with my parents and all, y'know, 
 I expect it would give me a better chance, y'know, if I was one, and 
 then this mixed-marriage business needn't be gone into at all*" 
 
 44 If you want," said I, 44 to do exactly the one thing which 
 would absolutely ensure Miss Travers saying No, you suggest to her 
 that you are willing to be an R.C* for her sake*" 
 
 He looked extremely blank* 
 
 44 The way," I continued, 44 to obtain leave for a mixed marriage, 
 is to promise that the children shall be brought up Catholics, and 
 that you won't interfere with your wife's religion; and she promises 
 she'll try in a reasonable way to show you the truth of hers* And 
 the one and only way of becoming a Catholic is to acquire a complete 
 conviction that the Catholic Faith is absolutely true." 
 
 44 Well," he said, rather glumly, “ of course, I haven't gone into 
 these things, but I daresay it's all right." 
 
 44 You've got to dare to say a lot more than that." 
 
 “ But look here, padre, I know a whole heap of fellows who 
 become R.C.'s in order to marry; at least I know a couple or so; but 
 you're always hearing about it; you don't mean to tell me it really 
 makes much odds to them ? They want to please the girl they're in 
 love with; and then they reckon what's good enough for her is good 
 
30 MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 enough for them* They wouldn't care one way or the other, left 
 to themselves*" 
 
 “ Well, of course, I'd consider that converts aren't left to themselves* 
 If they're called to have the Catholic Faith, God intervenes* He can 
 quite well start work upon a man through the instrumentality of a 
 girl, or a friend, or a book, or pretty well anything* I knew a man 
 once who was going on a job to Naples, and thought — God help 
 him ! — it would be a sound business proposition if he were the same 
 religion as the natives — out there at least* He made quite a good 
 Catholic in the long run* * * * But you've got to have the faith , 
 personal conviction, or whatever phrase you're used to* Else no 
 priest would receive you*" 
 
 44 But surely the priests wink at it now and again ? What about 
 these political marriages ?" 
 
 44 Look here," said I, 44 in any other department of life you 
 wouldn't dream of making that sort of suggestion* It's perfectly 
 astounding to me when I think of the state popular imagination 
 must be in when quite decent folks like you can say that sort of thing 
 to other decent folks, let's hope like me* I remember another man 
 — he hadn't the least spark of Catholic faith in him, and never has 
 had, but his prospective mother-in-law had set her heart on his 
 being a Catholic before he married her daughter, and was chivying 
 him — and at last he came to me and said: 4 Look here, padre, I'll 
 tell any old lie you like for the sake of peace* Carry on; you can 
 make me an R*C* right now*' I said: 4 If you'd even begun to get 
 hold of the idea of what you're talking about, you'd see that you were 
 insulting your fiancee in supposing she'd like you to tell lies; and 
 insulting the R*C* religion in supposing it would condescend to 
 accept you on the basis of a lie; not to mention your mother-in-law* 
 So don't do it*' I tell you, he was properly relieved !" 
 
 44 Well," Blake said, rather stiffly, 44 1 didn't quite realize you'd 
 take it like that* Perhaps I'd better apologize*" 
 
 I laughed* 
 
 “ Don't take that part too seriously* I know it's the conventional 
 thing to suppose priests are all out fishing for converts and appar- 
 ently don't much mind how they get 'em* As if it were the priest 
 who stood to gain by getting one, and not the convert*" 
 
 “ But look here, padre, I may as well speak plainly* In my view 
 I'm all right as I am* I don't see how I'd. gain particularly by 
 becoming an R*C* except for having peace in the house and 
 so on* And, of course, what Orwylstree said had something in 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 31 
 
 it. Bit awkward if one party goes one way and one the other. 
 But " 
 
 44 Wait a minute/' I said. 44 It strikes me you're romping on a 
 bit rapidly. Suppose you became a Catholic as you suggested and 
 then she said No ? Where'd you be ?" 
 
 44 It's not an idea I like to think of." 
 
 44 No; but you oughtn't to shut your eyes to the possibility. 
 Where would you be ?" 
 
 44 Blest if I know. Make the best of it, I suppose. In short, be 
 pretty well where I am, with a different label on." 
 
 44 Well, d'you mind my asking, What are you ?" 
 
 44 Oh, C. of E. Army C. of E.," he added, with a little laugh. 
 
 44 What exactly does that mean ?" 
 
 44 It doesn't mean anything exactly ," he said, rather sharply. 
 
 44 You mean you were brought up that way ?" 
 
 44 1 suppose so. After all, what else could you be ? Officially, I 
 mean. A man can't very well be a Primitive Methodist, can he ? 
 Not but what since a different sort of man began being made officers, 
 we've had a Baptist in the mess, I believe. Non-Con., anyway. 
 But good Lord, that's what I say, it made no difference. They were 
 just like the rest of us, as far as that went. Hadn't had the same 
 sort of home or schooling as most of us; but his religion didn't make 
 much odds, as far as I could see. Nor yet ours to us, I'm afraid." 
 
 44 So you think denominations are part of social status ?" I asked, 
 grinning a little. 44 And that provided a fellow's a decent sort of 
 fellow, he can have any religion or none, and no odds made ?" 
 
 44 Well, as I practically said, I haven't got a religion, except in the 
 sense all decent men have; and frankly, I don't see what I'd be the 
 better for having one. I'm not a saint; but I've got a conscience, 
 and there are certain things I wouldn't do, or, anyway, I feel a bit 
 disgusted when I do; I reckon I'm pretty average, and I don't set 
 out to be anything else." 
 
 44 Well, you believe in God ?" 
 
 44 Oh, yes,", he said, rather coldly. 
 
 44 Don't be offended. I always ask that. I've no doubt you do. 
 And I'm not going into all the reasons which prove His existence. 
 But d'you know anything about Him ?" 
 
 “ Oh, I suppose so. I learnt the Bible at school. . ♦ . No. As 
 you were. Can one know anything about Him ? I don't see how." 
 
 44 Well, you can. But anyway; d'you know anything or, if you 
 like, feel anything about Him so as to make any practical difference ? 
 
32 
 
 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 Is there any one thing you do or don't do just because of God ? 
 D'you keep off adultery or perjury or stealing because you feel He'd 
 object ? D'you do your best for these fellows at the Town Hall, 
 even when you've got a liver and feel like cursing the lot of them, 
 because He orders you to be just ?" 
 
 44 Don't suppose so." 
 
 “ D'you ever say any prayers ?" 
 
 “ Not since I left school." 
 
 “ Well, I bet you do. I don't mean kneeling down and. reciting 
 long prayers, or any set prayers. But d'you ever pray on your own ?" 
 
 44 I go to church on and off when I'm at home." 
 
 44 No, no. Not church. But you occasionally speak to God ?" 
 
 “ Well, possibly." 
 
 “ What d'you say ?" 
 
 He moved restlessly. 
 
 44 Look here, this is getting a bit intimate." 
 
 44 Sorry, Blake. But I consider we aren't casual acquaintances any 
 more. I'm not meaning to be intrusive. I perfectly well under- 
 stand when a man's sensitive too. Listen. I'll tell you a thing. 
 During the war you prayed when you had wind up. But not only 
 then. In fact, you almost felt you'd be a hypocrite to pray much 
 then. Still, you did. But there are moments when you feel so fear- 
 fully fit and bucked with life, especially at rather unusual moments, 
 and when there's a sort of sense of purity about, like a very clear 
 summer morning when, by a fluke, you've been up, and you some- 
 how feel God's at the back of all, and you feel He's jolly good* . ♦ . 
 And, similarly, I expect you've once or twice been so up against it 
 that you've almost angrily appealed to God to lend a hand. ♦ ♦ ♦ 
 And, finally, you've prayed a bit more since you've been in love; 
 and I daresay on other occasions when you've been in love. . . ♦" 
 
 He smiled quite pleasantly. 
 
 44 Well, I'm not always falling in and out of it, exactly. . ♦ ♦ 
 Still, I own to being a bit susceptible. But it's queer your guessing 
 it took me that way — made me say my prayers, I mean. ♦ ♦ ♦ By 
 Jove, haven't I asked, once or twice, that she should — er — like me 
 a bit ! I say, padre," said the young man quite anxiously, “ should 
 you say I had the ghost of a chance ?" 
 
 44 Oh — well, you know ! I've seen you together exactly once !" 
 
 “ Well, will you put in a word for me if she — if you — if there's an 
 opportunity ?" 
 
 “ Ah 1 You mustn't ask me to play Providence ! It's not my 
 
MR, FRANCIS NEWNES 33 
 
 line, honest ! And are you asking me to cut out my friend Reggie 
 Orwylstree ? Suppose he asked me the same thing ? He hasn't, 
 I promise you — but " 
 
 44 D'you suppose " he interrupted, 44 I say — is Orwylstree — 
 
 oh damn l" 
 
 Then he apologized for his language, and murmured something 
 about my 44 cloth," , ♦ , 
 
 44 Look here," I said, 44 Let's get back a moment, I assure you 
 Orwylstree's never mentioned the subject, and if he did I'd say the 
 same as I do to you. But now listen. Why d'you apologize to me 
 for saying 4 damn ' ?" 
 
 44 Oh well, y'know, parson, you know. Leastways a padre, anyhow. 
 Suppose it's much the same thing . . . don't want to shock anyone." 
 
 44 No. But d'you consider 4 damn ' wrong ?" 
 
 44 Can't say I do. Still, well, one has to be a bit careful before 
 padres, I suppose. Though he broke off, 
 
 44 Now, look here. Either it's wrong, and you oughtn't to say it, 
 parson or no parson; or it's not, and then they oughtn't to be shocked. 
 Though, really, even without any army experience, I should say 
 parsons would be kept pretty busy if they had to be shocked every 
 time they heard 4 damn ' said." 
 
 44 You don't consider it wrong ?" 
 
 44 Wrong ? Well, it's a word, merely, isn't it ? It has no mean- 
 ing. Anyway, I don't understand the idea of being shocked at 
 words, merely ! I might dislike a word, or even object to it if it 
 had an objectionable meaning. But shocked ? To be shocked 
 implies being unpleasantly surprised. I'd be shocked if you lost 
 a couple of stone in the next week. I'd be shocked if you told me 
 you had a wife already, and yet were courting Barbara ! But 
 swearing, on the whole, is a matter of taste. Sometimes disgustingly 
 bad taste. ♦ . . Now blasphemy, that's a different story. I loathe 
 it inexpressibly. But what I'm getting at is, if you and I are ever 
 to get any forrarder we've got to cut out all these frills and con- 
 ventions and thinking things'll shock me because I wear what you 
 call 4 cloth ' . . and not because they're wrong in themselves. 
 Absolute sincerity, Blake, or we shall be at cross-purposes all the 
 while. But I'll take sincerity for granted from now on, and we shall 
 say to each other what we really think about real things. That all 
 right ? No half-beliefs and half-disbeliefs. If possible, we'll get 
 right back to the fundamental stuff. But don't have wind up ! I 
 gather you've not much use for parsons ?" 
 
 3 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 34 
 
 44 Well — to tell you the truth — well, I don't honestly see what 
 they're /or, y'know. I suppose you've got to have 'em to baptize 
 you — though — well, it'd be rum not to have been baptized, though 
 what exactly the point of it is, I don't know. And you require 'em 
 for marriages and funerals, though why parsons, again I don't know. 
 Any of your pals'd be only too glad to say a prayer over you when 
 you were being put away. But they seem to require 'em for mar- 
 riages, and floating round hospitals, and to take Church parades and 
 so on — though look here, padre, if we're not to be conventional, 
 what can be more conventional than a church parade ? Make it 
 optional, and not a man would go." 
 
 44 They all say that. But I'll tell you a yarn about parsons. It's 
 become famous; but I go guarantee for it. I was most meekly 
 sitting in my corner of a railway carriage, most unprovocative, I 
 assure you — when a greasy individual opposite me fixed me for 
 about a minute and then said suddenly : 4 Parsons is bloody !' I was 
 so taken aback that I said, 4 There's bloodier !' He was so astonished 
 that he said, 4 Well, I'm damned !' And I said, 4 Not yet 1 ' " 
 
 He yelled with laughter. 
 
 44 Four words ! Not so bad, was it ? If one had had time to 
 think one would have made a mess of it. The whole carriage 
 rocked with delight, and the man rolled himself up in his Mirror 
 and I hugged myself all the way home." 
 
 44 Say what you will," said he, 44 people are more scared of a 
 parson than a baby. You're awkward when they come to dinner; 
 same at tennis parties; same anywhere. Pity they're so black ♦ 
 Sheer sight of a long black coat puts the wind up me. And it's 
 just the same when they're R.C.'s — not that I've seen many. Bit 
 worse, if anything. Mysterious, y'know. Different somehow. 
 One half expects 'em to talk Latin at you suddenly, or burn you 
 at the stake or something. But I expect there are good sorts among 
 'em, same as elsewhere. In fact, I know there are. Both our padres 
 in France were damned good sorts. Sorry !" 
 
 44 I thoroughly agree," said I. 44 I could cap any instance of the 
 decency of Anglican parsons, and Nonconformists too, that you 
 might offer me. But, on the whole, you feel they aren't natural, 
 don't you — I mean any black-coated cleric of whatever denomina- 
 tion — and that you aren't able to be natural either while they're 
 there ?" 
 
 44 That's it. Have to be on one's best behaviour. Very good 
 for us, probably." 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 35 
 
 “ It isn't, if it's resentful and not genuine. Well, listen. We've 
 had a longish yarn, and I don't mind if you get nothing from it, 
 except that nothing matters to start with, except absolute mental 
 sincerity. I'm perfectly sure you'll come back for some more, won't 
 you ?" 
 
 44 1 should hope so. Tell me some more yarns like that one, and 
 I'll come every night I" 
 
 44 Oh, no. That was unique. Nothing so artistic could happen 
 twice. But make up your mind that this huge fact, God, is as real 
 a fact as that table," said I, hitting it, 44 or your food, or Barbara ♦ 
 And you don't tell her lies, or think lies about her, nor yet mere 
 conventionalisms ; but you're sincere all through." 
 
 44 By Jove, I am," he said ; 44 I'd kick myself if I wasn't." 
 
 44 Right," said I. 44 Then go on your knees very sincerely before 
 God to-night for a minute or two, even if you don't say anything. 
 Take your hat right off. . ♦ ♦" 
 
 After that we talked about indifferent things till he went away. 
 
Chapter V 
 
 T WO or three days after this I was waiting to cross Victoria 
 Street just by the station, and reflecting with a certain melan- 
 choly on tea at the Ladies' Minerva Club, to which I had 
 been bidden by Lady Olivia Binny, the well-known West-End 
 Democrat; she wanted to show me the MS* of her youngest niece's 
 collected poems, of which Little Laughing Larches was said to display 
 a truly mystical perception of the Underlying Reality, and, if I could 
 find an agreeable publisher. Lady Olivia was sure the book would 
 sell extremely well* Lady Olivia had herself supplied the child's 
 illustrations and designed a cover, representing a little girl kissing 
 a larch-tree* 44 1," Lady Olivia had written to me, 44 have merely 
 contributed the craftsmanship, the mere mechanical extermination. 
 The work is really Flora's; the inwardness, the Thing, is hers* But 
 I have been careful not to be too ♦ ♦ ♦ expert ! The Thought was 
 — great, and yet it was a child's* The pictures must express 
 that* * *" 
 
 I was roused from these meditations by a devastating whistle, 
 which held up the traffic, I am sure, from Shepherd's Bush to 
 Whitechapel; and lo! Mr* Francis Newnes, ex-Corporal, in heated 
 altercation with a policeman* 
 
 44 There ain't no la w agin it, as I've heard on," he was saying* 
 44 Carn't a bloke whistle if 'e likes, street or no street ? Carn't 'e 
 give vent to 'is innercent light-heartedness ? This ain't no funeral, 
 as I knows on* This ain't Westminster Abbey* When a bloke sees 
 a bloke as he's a pal on, an' is full of joy an' rapture consequently, 
 an' wishful to attrack 'is attention like, 'oo's to prevent 'im whist- 
 lin' ? 'Oo's to do it ? I ain't imitated none of your bloomin' cop's 
 
 calls, I ain't* Tain't my fault if the buses stops Well, an' 'ow 
 
 are you," he broke off, shaking hands with incredible violence, for 
 by now I had crossed to the island* 
 
 “As you appear 'to know this man, sir," said the policeman to 
 me , 44 I'll be glad if you takes him elsewheres*" 
 
 44 Old army acquaintance, Sergeant," said I, forming a rapid 
 
 36 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 37 
 
 opinion* 44 Knew him in hospital* * * * Hope you prefer your 
 present job to a couple of years ago ♦ ♦ * ?" 
 
 He grinned, saluted, and I piloted the Corporal back into Wilton 
 Road. 
 
 44 Where'll we go ?" he said, excitedly* 
 
 44 Wait a moment; I must 'phone to somebody to postpone a tea*" 
 He whistled* 
 
 44 A lady ?" he enquired* 
 
 44 Oh yes !" 
 
 44 She'll never forgive yer !" he said, with intense earnestness, and 
 stood still in the middle of the pavement, clutching my arm* 
 
 She never did; still, as I told him, it was worth the sacrifice* 
 
 I telephoned, somewhat distracted by hearing Frank Newnes, just 
 as I closed the little door, declare in a hoarse whisper to an elderly 
 flower-seller: 
 
 44 Goin' to tea with a lady, an' turns 'er down for Mr* Francis 
 
 Newnes, late 'Olioway, an' Corporal in " 
 
 What further he said I didn't hear; but he must have so touched 
 the heart of the flower-lady that she presented both of us, on my 
 exit, with a buttonhole, to my great embarrassment* 
 
 44 What you want, Frank," said I, looking at him, 44 is a meal* 
 Choose a likely-looking place*" 
 
 We found an eating-house, almost empty at that hour, sat down, 
 and he perused the list* 
 
 44 Hossidges ?" said he* 44 N-a-ow* Heard too much about 'em* 
 
 Quiver an' achin' ? Ar* 'Ad f im yesterday* Gripe an' bunions 
 
 Knows too much about f im , leastways the trimmin's* * * *" 
 
 44 Frank, if you go on like that, I shan't be able to eat anything 
 myself* Look here* Have some steak and onions, and I'll have 
 sausages* I like 'em* But don't attack my imagination; and I 
 think you might modestly convey my buttonhole to the young lady 
 who'll wait on us, because I can't wear it*" 
 
 (I may add that he covered me with confusion, while he pre- 
 sented it, by saying it was a present from the reverend gent to a good 
 girl* Fortunately she tossed her head and said she might give it 
 to her girl-friend; but she was quite pleased, really, and the meal 
 was excellent*) 
 
 44 Now," said I, 44 give an exact account of all you've been doing 
 since we met*" 
 
 44 Well," he said, 44 1 wrote to say 'ow I done cinema-shouter for 
 a bit, though I reckon you thought it were a West-end lay, it bein' 
 
38 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 be'ind Commercial Road in reality, a littl'un, where there's shoutin' 
 allowed an' coaxin' the public in like. But that weren't much. 
 Then my pal as I were stayin' with previous to this 'ere movie-stunt, 
 'e gets me a job drivin' a van for parcels like; deliverin', for a 
 millinery firm, Oates's; don't know if you know it; millinery an' 
 'aberdashery an' wot not. That were a fair job, long as it lasted." 
 
 44 Why didn't it last ?" 
 
 “ Why, they reckoned to send me to a branch at Berkhamsted. 
 Gawd 'elp us ! Berk-ham-sted 1 Now you look 'ere, Far-ther. 
 First rule in the game is: It's got to be London. London every 
 time, or I snuffs it. See Francis Newnes of 'Olloway in Berkham- 
 sted ? Pine away, I would, an' become a interestin' angel like as 
 you used to talk on. No. London for me, an' when they mentions 
 Berkhamsted, I faints away where I stands, an' then I 'ops it, an' 
 never goes back to Messrs. Oates, not nohow. Well, then I picks 
 up with this 'ere coffee-house stunt, wot only staffs itself with dis- 
 abled men, an' that were all right for a time, seein' as 'ow I could 
 sit on a stool 'arf of the hours, there bein' no one cornin' an' me 
 havin' to 'ave a 'arf-time sitting job; that's rule numberTwo." 
 
 44 Well, why didn't that go on 1" 
 
 44 Oh Far-ther 1" said he, very plaintively. 44 Now do you see 
 me at it ? See me settin' on a stool an' 'andin' out cups o' coffee, 
 one per hour, to respec'ble folks, or tea most like, not to call it tea, 
 an' save in the evenin', just as we're goin' to close, never a soul 
 wot'll appreciate me conversation save now an' again a taxi 7 driver 
 wot's in the Salvation Army simultaneous. Now if it had been one 
 of them coffee-stalls at 'Yde Park Corner like, open all night, an' 
 just wot's wanted for — well, you knows for 'oo — the early mornin' 
 worm, anyways, an' the fly-by-nights wot cops 'em — now that was 
 me ; but they're 'ard to come by." 
 
 44 So you chucked it ?" 
 
 44 Say rather it chucks me. I won't lie to you, nor would I. I 'as 
 me couple, one day, feelin' I'd go roarin' mad if I didn't. An' a nice 
 little bust it were. An' drunk I was, I'm not denyin' it. An' talk a 
 bit I did, I make no doubt; an' cop a p'liceman under the chin with 
 a saucer I make no doubt I did; which it were required fer the sauce 
 'e was out-pourin' onto me, it sure were; not but wot I give it 'im 
 back with a ounce or two o' pepper added an' I loves to think of it ; 
 but they fires me, after that, an' 'ere I am." 
 
 44 Where's here ?" 
 
 44 Well, I has a stall in 'Addock Road: Isle o' Dogs way — meat- 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 39 
 
 stall But that's only good o' nights, Saturdays specially* But you 
 look 'ere* 'Tain't wot it was* Wot can you give 'em for twopence 
 nowadays ? Nothink* Why, the scraps an' skins alone comes to 
 more nor twopence, prices bein' wot they are, an' it's the bone as 
 counts. An' when I tried to 'elp it out a bit with stale buns an' bits 
 as you gets off the eat 'ouses day before, the bun-stalls objects, an' 
 says that's their monopoly* An' when me leg 'urts, shout I cannot* 
 Not to rival 'im wot's opposite side o' the road as was A*S*C* I make 
 no doubt, or anyways, never stopped one* 'Aven't got the 'eart for 
 shoutin'* Want to be let alone, more like, an' curl up in me comer* 
 Shoutin' ? Naow." 
 
 44 What d'you do during the day-time ?" 
 
 44 Parcels* Open a door or two* 'Ave a bit of a gamble now an' 
 again, an' gets me gate-money for the football* But ail the places 
 is monopoly, down to the opening of taxi-doors*" 
 
 At this point the neighbouring Cathedral came into my mind* 
 He had practically finished his meal* 
 
 44 Frank," I said, 44 whenever I come to London, if I'm in this 
 neighbourhood, I look in at our Cathedral, round the corner* I 
 always go to see how the mosaics are getting on* Besides, it's a 
 great place, and I like it*" 
 
 44 Very good," said he; 44 toddle along*" 
 
 But at the steps in Ambrosden Avenue, he halted, and said: 
 44 Don't be too long, Far-ther 1" 
 
 44 Well," I said, 44 you aren't going to stop out there ?" 
 
 44 Sure thing," said he; 44 you don't see me cornin' into these 
 grand places with clothes like this on me ? If I'd known I was to 
 meet you, I'd have got meself up in me nifty blue serge an' me 
 clarssy yellow boots, and me bowler 'at*" 
 
 Frank was wearing no collar, but a large handkerchief knotted 
 round his neck; and his frayed coat cuffs had worked themselves 
 so far up that quite three inches of his extraordinary tattooing (which 
 began on his chest and between his shoulder-blades and came right 
 down to his wrists) were visible* So I concluded he wore a sleeve- 
 less vest, only, beneath his coat* 
 
 44 No one worries here about clothes," I said, 44 or shouldn't do* 
 Anyway, who's going to have the cheek to criticize ? You're my 
 friend, aren't you, and you're along with me* Where I go, you can* 
 If anyone makes remarks, you'll hear me make some; that I promise 
 you* But the point is, this isn't a grand place* Or if it is, it's because 
 it's God's house and He's good enough to let the two of us into it*" 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 40 
 
 He followed me rather moodily. 
 
 But in that enormous place he was unable to maintain the mood. 
 In that exempted air, the associations of 44 outside ” dissolved. That 
 was always the first impression. From the massive, turbid air of 
 London, swirling with energies and passion, this great hollow of 
 silence and immobility had been exempted; it was a cathedral-under- 
 the-sea; a church in the mountain's heart; true sanctuary. Up to 
 its walls, and on them, and down upon its roofs, pressed and strained 
 all the dense work of London; the interwoven effort; the impulse, 
 irresistible, out there, of humanity; packed thoughts and judgments, 
 condensed endeavour; but here, all had been flung back by these 
 vaults and these straight walls; here was an interspace, a vacuum, 
 where we might be admitted and yet draw breath, living otherwise. 
 
 Frank stood still, automatically, at the bottom, looking with anxious, 
 unaccustomed eyes, up the enormous nave, flooded with faint fog, 
 offering but few outlines for his eyes to fasten on — a dim altar# 
 built beneath great columns; a gigantic, shadowy cross, that floated 
 dark and high. I could see him sink, almost, into a dream, the 
 dream of relief that comes when pressures are gone; loads removed; 
 a peace, in which thought had no more to be restless, nothing had 
 to be done . 
 
 But after a few moments you became aware that the cathedral was 
 living its own life; this was no vacuum; this, if any, was the focus of 
 force; this was the reality, sending off waves of energy through the 
 shadowy unstable elements that tumultuously surged outside it, else, 
 without form and void. An incomparable life, generating its own 
 low thunderous voices, luminous with what was neither night nor 
 day; a life indeed that seemed to me not just diffused, but having 
 its own heart, welling up most of all over there, at the left, far down 
 the church, where a few lights twinkled and you could see, now, a 
 kneeling blackness, worshippers looking all one way. ♦ . ♦ 
 
 Obedient to I know not v/hat instinct I led the Corporal away 
 from that, to the right, where even the brilliant adornment of these 
 chapels remained veiled and indistinguishable at this hour, just 
 shadows upon shadows, not interfered with by the myriad starry 
 points of gold. 
 
 We went right up to the Lady Chapel and sat down on two chairs 
 near the back of it. 
 
 He let himself sink heavily and sighed. He was certainly very 
 tired. 
 
 I let him remain in silence as long as he wished. 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 4i 
 
 Then he said: 
 
 “ I was silly about them clothes* I ain't got no blue serge, nor I 
 ain't got nothing but this cap* I were ashamed of lettin' on to you 
 about it — I '' 
 
 But his words broke o c f, and he remained silent once more, 
 held hypnotized by a candle near to the Lady Altar* 
 
 After a pause he said: 
 
 “ Reckon there's another thing I'll tell you* That there cinema 
 shouting wasn't the first thing I did after leavin' me pal; that were 
 0*K*; I did stay with that pal of mine you knows on for a bit, an' 
 we 'ad a good time, but it stands to reason that bit o' money wouldn't 
 last; so we goes down to Brighton an' we starts s ingin' on the beach, 
 reckonin' on its bein' good sport an' bringin' in enough to starve on* 
 But it's truth I'm tellin' you; I didn't go down a bit, not me songs or 
 patter. I'm meanin'* Odd, ain't it ? Now in the army it was me 
 for them, every time* Concerts, but still more the sing-songs wot 
 happened informal, or as you knows, in the wards* Yarns by the 
 'undred I 'ad; an' songs; an' there was a good few as could be sung 
 anywheres, in public like, no matter 'oo's listenin'* Al-ways went 
 down* Always welcome* Reckon there's something special in the 
 army* Ready to accept cheerful, the lads is* Provided you knows 
 wot's wot and aren't offensive, which you soon picks up 'ow not to 
 be, pals they all is, an' chums up automatic and accepts wot you 
 'ands out real friendly* That's wot I found, anyways* And 'avin' 
 a bit more cheek than most, I reckon, I kept on at it an' put it down 
 to me own superior cleverness an' winnin' ways* Wrote meself 
 down irresistible, I aid* * * * But on that beach — course they'd 
 gather round, an' they'd laugh a bit; but then slide along, never a 
 thank you, never a shout to come an' 'ave a friendly one; or rare as 
 honesty, that was* I reckon there weren't nothin' special about 
 me after all* Just one more v/ounded sojer, cadgin' coins an' too 
 lazy to work* * * * An' that's where I first struck monopolies* 
 Reckon the beach should be free, if nowhere else* But never a bit 
 of it* Marked out, it were, 'xcept where no one goes* Shoved off, 
 you was, fer plantin' yerself on the next man's claim* * ♦ *" 
 
 “ That'll have disheartened you a lot ?" 
 
 44 Well, I keeps cornin' up like the cork you called me* Down I 
 wouldn't stay, nor will* But there's something changed like in me* 
 When I think of 'ow I shouted to fetch 'em in to that there Spinx 
 I told you on, or even for me old tripe barrow — why, it was me, the 
 show was; "come an' listen to Kid Newnes,' the sayin' was; but 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 43 
 
 now ? Love you ! it's 'ollow like, me shoutin' is, something's 
 
 gone out of me, an' 'e won't come back." 
 
 44 Don't you really want to get something a bit more settled ?" 
 
 44 Well, could I?" he said. 44 Money ? I can't keep it. And 
 you wants money to get anything worth 'avin' on your own." 
 
 44 Yes, but need it be on your own ? Won't you have to get a 
 job under someone who'll certainly be master, and you work — with 
 him, of course, but — well, take orders 1" 
 
 “ Ar," he said ; 44 but could I ? Could I ?" 
 
 44 You did in the army." 
 
 44 And if it wasn't for me leg wouldn't I go straight back to it." 
 
 “ Well, shift the spirit you liked there into civilian conditions." 
 
 44 Can't be done. The army's spoilt me for everything but army. 
 Restless I was before, in a way, but put me 'ole 'eart into all I did; 
 an' I'm restless still, but I can't put me 'eart into nothing." 
 
 44 But you can't possibly go through life like that. You can't 
 make a life out of that. I'd give you a lot of scope for variety and 
 change, but you must have some thread running through it to hold 
 it together." 
 
 44 Why ?" 
 
 “ Well, you won't always be able to hop from one thing to another. 
 You'll grow old. You'll want something permanent to give you 
 the necessary foundation l" 
 
 44 Ar. Don't talk about growin' old !" 
 
 “ Well, but you will. At least I hope so." 
 
 44 An' I 'opes not , not if it's to mean slavery. Ow ! don't I feel 
 'appy," said he, wriggling his shoulders, 44 when I knows I'm not 
 tied down by hours and wages an' wot not, not even to a 'ouse, but 
 doss where handy. See me marchin' down the street, limp or no 
 limp, feelin' meself naked-like, ready to fly like, fly without a aero- 
 plane, but me — jest me " said he, in ecstasy. 
 
 After a moment he resumed. 
 
 44 Not but what I am a simple innercent kid, or was, though me 
 thinkin' I knew the world backwards ! Remember me askin' you 
 if you'd come an' see me in 'Olloway ? Thinkin' as 'ow all I'd 'ave 
 to do would be to 'op out of 'ospital straight into them old digs ? 
 Never so much as occurred to me they'd not be there for me. No- 
 thing there; nothing the same; not the landlady, not the rents, not 
 me friends. An' not me. Changed it all is, an' me with it. Brought 
 down a lot, I am." 
 
 I locked up to where, through an arch, I could just see the great 
 
MR- FRANCIS NEWNES 43 
 
 crucifix, pale now, with a slight reflected light, and forming a high, 
 uplifted point to which all the lines of the Cathedral seemed to 
 converge- I stared and stared at the Crucifix, and since I knew it 
 well, I felt that I could see the gaunt rigid figure upon it, nailed, 
 immovable, pierced right through, scarcely a man at all, scarcely a 
 dead slave - - - 
 
 44 Wot are you thinkin' of ?” said Frank- 
 
 44 1 think I was thinking you might have to be brought down all 
 the way — right down — before you can start on the life I so much 
 hope for you-” 
 
 44 Was you,” he said, with mock indignation- 44 You was ? Well, 
 I won't 'ave it- Tell you wot I've bin thinkin'in this rum old church 
 of yours, though Mr- Francis Newnes inside of a church is the 
 rummest start of any- Time was when I looked forward to 'avin' 
 a little pub- of me own, why, 'ave it in the country, even, I would 
 'ave, I was that set upon it- But I reckon that's far away- Now, 
 wot I might 'ave in the corner of me eye, p'raps and p'raps not, is 
 a little fried fish shop down Stepney way, somethink special an' out 
 of the ordinary an' worthy of me, me not bein' ordinary, as you f ave 
 to own- I might even see 'ow to raise the necessary, borrowin' a 
 
 bit off one or two I knows on, an' payin' gradual ” his eyes lit 
 
 up; he saw the flaming window of his shop, aglow through the 
 Cathedral- 
 
 44 Ow's that for settled life an' the golden thread ?” he asked/ 
 rather too loud for where we were- 
 
 “ I don't like the borrowing,” I said- 44 But — well, anything to 
 give you some sort of a purpose in life ! Else we'll have you going 
 to bits, and that won't do- Now look, Frank, come and I'll give you 
 a glass of beer, as it's late enough by now, and then I have to be off- 
 I have to see a man at dinner and catch the 9-30 back to Wilchurch-” 
 
 We parted soon after that, he swearing every oath that he'd write 
 and let me know how he was thriving- 
 
Chapter VI 
 
 I WAS on my way to Barbara's birthday party when I met Blake* 
 u Blake !" I cried, “ for Heaven's sake come along with me 
 to the Travers's* It's Barbara's birthday; there'll be a mob, 
 but if you and I go together, we can support one another in the back- 
 ground* I’ve got to go*" 
 
 “ As a matter of fact I was going there myself," said he. “ But if 
 there's going to be a crowd * * ♦" 
 
 ** Well, we'll back one another up* We needn't talk to anyone. 
 But wait a minute 1 Old Lady Sophia'll be there* Lady Sophia 
 Lindale — Barbara's great-aunt* She's rather terrifying, but as 
 good as gold, and she'll love you if you stand up to her* ♦ ♦ ♦ I'll 
 introduce you*" 
 
 " Oh, Lord," he groaned ; 44 this is awful 1 I'm not good at great- 
 aunts, and anyhow, I tell you I'm getting downright self-conscious, 
 keeping on going to that house ! Keep thinking they'll be thinking 
 — oh, all sorts of things," he wound up lamely* 
 
 44 People don't think about one* They just notice one vaguely 
 and then float off to something else* Most chastening* * Oh, here's 
 — er — Captain Blake, isn't it ? I believe he manages all the un- 
 employed or something* What a lot of soldiers there are about 
 still 1 By the way, how is your dear nephew ? ' " 
 
 44 Yes," he said, indignantly; 44 Or, 4 Here's that Roman priest* 
 Extraordinary how priests work their way in everywhere* * * * Of 
 course, the Travers's are so kind * But, talking of priests, the dear 
 
 Archdeacon said to me yesterday * * ♦' " 
 
 “ Quite so* You obviously know all about it*" 
 
 44 But I very much hope," he said, with a portentous sigh , 44 Miss 
 Travers notices me a little more than that*" 
 
 44 She falls," I said , 44 into obvious ecstasy on sight of you*" 
 
 44 No, no, I say ! Look here, you mustn't pull my leg about Miss 
 Travers !" 
 
 44 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 45 
 
 I grinned and squeezed his elbow, and we arrived thus at the 
 Travers's door* 
 
 The room was full, and at first I thought I knew no one. How- 
 ever, there sat Lady Sophia, bolt upright on a sort of throne, occu- 
 pied with a charming and excessively cheeky boy of seventeen, called 
 Cecil Calthrop, who was probably the only person in the room, 
 except Barbara, who could manage her* What Barbara did with 
 Blake, I couldn't quite see ; I know she swept him from me, and then 
 steered me miles away towards a very hatted and pearly lady whom 
 I didn't know, though, when Barbara murmured introductions, I 
 thought she said we'd * met '; and then she left me with a glint of 
 obvious malice in her eye* 
 
 The lady looked annoyed, and went on looking it* I could see 
 she took me for one of the thronging Wilchurch curates, and gradually 
 I realized that she was wanting, inside, to get attached to Lady 
 Sophia's group, and I was preventing her* 
 
 She began to talk very rapidly of the miseries of the Wilchurch 
 climate, and how she wouldn't dream of being out of London just 
 then, if she hadn't felt she really ought to take pity on her husband, 
 for a change, though really she had been thinking of the Riviera, 
 44 though nowadays," she said, fingering her pearls, 44 everything 
 is so fearfully expensive 1 But perhaps you don't know the Riviera ?" 
 She looked sideways at me, lifting her eyebrows. 
 
 I murmured something* 
 
 44 Of course," she went on, 44 1 simply couldn't live without it; 
 but I daresay you wouldn't enjoy it* I go at all seasons ! At the 
 very time the Travers's were at Lourdes last year, was at Monte * 
 Wasn't that terrible, padre ?" 
 
 Her voice was shrill, and carried* Cecil Calthrop caught her eye* 
 
 “ Why ?" called he across the room. “ Had you got into trouble 
 there or something, Mrs. Vale ?" 
 
 “ I thought, of course, the padre might object to my being at 
 Monte." 
 
 “ Far from it," I said, fervently* 
 
 “ Oh, it's quite as bad as it's painted," she said, piqued, and 
 suspicious of Cecil's chuckle* 
 
 “ I'm told," said Lady Sophia, “ that all those lovely places are 
 quite spoilt*" 
 
 She said it to Cecil, but Mrs* Vale felt herself admitted into the 
 circle, and changed her chair to one on my left so that she could 
 speak more easily* 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 46 
 
 44 Of course, the poor dear Theatre-people ” she began* 
 
 44 I was not speaking of theatre folks, my dear,” said Lady Sophia* 
 
 44 They have the right to be vulgar, and so they aren't* Besides, 
 my kinsman, St* Ermyn, married a charming girl from the variety 
 stage* I meant people who have no right to be vulgar*” 
 
 44 But one should be grateful to them,” cried Cecil* 44 Theatre 
 folks are so discreet nowadays that if the others didn't look so 
 theatrical, no one would know which v/as which*” 
 
 She smiled at him indulgently* 
 
 44 We have abdicated,” she said* 44 Pleasure for its own sake is 
 usually vulgar* Luxury for its own sake always is* We were 
 brought up to be able to use luxury and to do without it* The 
 ball-rooms were gorgeous, but the bedrooms— oh dear me l Fires, 
 my dear ? Not we 1” 
 
 44 A splendid Sparta,” he murmured* 
 
 44 What I disliked at Monte Carlo,” said I to Mrs* Vale, who after 
 a gasp, looked almost respectfully at me , 44 was the children* Curled 
 and frizzed and doliified until they weren't human* That, and the 
 pigeon shooting*” 
 
 She recovered herself* 
 
 44 There was plenty of skill in the pigeon shooting,” she declared, 
 44 though perhaps you wouldn't notice that* Do you shoot ? Or 
 perhaps you don't — er — approve of sport* I notice clergymen 
 often don't'' 
 
 44 Perhaps not,” I said* 44 I don't know many; but the last bull- 
 fight I was at — — ” 
 
 This time she really looked astonished* 
 
 44 I confess it was also the first* Certainly I hated it, though it 
 was most skilful* * * * At Nimes, you know, but Spanish matadors 
 and bulls — but perhaps you don't go in for bull-fighting*” 
 
 44 I've certainly never seen a bull-fight*” 
 
 44 Neither should I, if I hadn't been hung up there on my way to 
 Lourdes*” 
 
 44 Dear me ! Did you go to Lourdes, too ? I'd have thought 
 
 you Oh well, after all. I've been myself and I confess I 
 
 don't believe in Lourdes, either*” 
 
 44 What do you mean by 4 either ' ?” 
 
 44 Well, I suppose I ought to — but you " 
 
 44 If you ought to — well, you ought to 1 But why ought you to ? 
 And why oughtn't I ?” 
 
 44 Of course,” she said, 44 I make a point of never dragging religion 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 47 
 
 into general conversation* But personally I'm a Catholic* Roman 
 Catholic* In fact, a convert/' she said firmly* 
 
 44 Oh — well — I'm a Catholic priest myself after all 1" 
 
 44 Oh — High Church I suppose* But — well, I own I'm broad- 
 minded, but I can't allow you're priests, you know; oh no ! But do 
 let's talk of something else*" 
 
 44 But I assure you I'm the genuine article ! Roman, Papist, 
 black as black !" 
 
 44 But — good heavens ! I quite understood — well — I jumped to 
 the conclusion, when Barbara Travers introduced you, you were one 
 of the Cathedral clergy I" 
 
 44 Do I look it ? Nothing so respectable*" 
 
 44 I'm afraid I don't know the Catholic clergy here* I — well, I 
 am here very little* You're always here ?" 
 
 44 Except when he's at Monte or bull-fighting," said Cecil* 
 
 44 Oh do please let's talk of something else," cried Mrs* Vale* 
 
 44 Well," said 1, 44 if we mustn't talk about religion or roulette, 
 what shall we talk about ?" 
 
 44 My dear Father," said Lady Sophia, 44 do not let us talk about 
 anything else for a moment, because, my dear," she said to Mrs* 
 Vale, 44 since we clearly may mention — ah ! — roulette in general 
 conversation, why not our much more dignified religion ?" 
 
 44 1 always feel it's somehow rather bad taste——" she 
 began* 
 
 Lady Sophia's eyebrows went up* Then she relented, but 
 dangerously* 
 
 44 Like talking about one's ancestors," she said* 44 Or one's pearls* 
 / see I" 
 
 44 Of course, it's very wonderful to feel about it like that," said 
 Mrs* Vale, wishing she hadn't put her necklace on at tea-time* 44 I 
 do myself sometimes — I remember I did when I was first received 
 and someone told me I'd joined the religion of the scullery* * * *" 
 
 44 So they did me," said Cecil ; 44 and next time I called I rang 
 the area bell and sent up my card from the kitchen — wouldn't come 
 up till I was fetched*" 
 
 4 Sculleries," said Lady Sophia, 44 are often cleaner than the 
 drawing-room* It is true I don't often visit them, but I dare say 
 there's not much to choose between sculleries and carpenters' shops* 
 My first ancestor did carpentering, my dear*" 
 
 44 But how interesting," began Mrs* Vale* Then she saw, said 
 44 Oh 1" and collapsed* 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 48 
 
 44 My spiritual mamma/' said Cecil, to the rescue, 44 was a quite 
 too charming demoiselle in a confectioner's at Havre." 
 
 44 My dear boy J" said Lady Sophia, tapping his arm. 
 
 44 Sure thing, ma tante ♦ I adore coffee fondants and till I'd set 
 going a really passionate affaire she wouldn't pick 'em out for me. 
 But afterwards all went well. ♦ ♦ . Then one Sunday she took me 
 to High Mass at St. Michel's. I didn't like the High Mass, but 
 there was a warm corner in that church where I could go and eat 
 my fondants and contemplate a certain — er — statue. It was sym- 
 bolical. Which'd I choose? I confronted the two — er — ideals. 
 Which'd I concentrate on ? Fondants ? or the other ? I decided 
 fondants were too — well, fondant as a basis for life. I substituted 
 coffee walnuts. Still too sweet. Remarkable chapel, that. Sacred 
 Heart chapel. Lady Sophia. On the left at the bottom. " 
 
 44 My dear child," she cried. 44 Havre doesn't attract me. But 
 you must have been a mere infant then, so that I needn't worry 
 about that flirtation 1" 
 
 44 Oh, but think of my appalling career ever since, godmamma !" 
 
 44 I think of it, godson, with the greatest satisfaction." 
 
 44 I touches my cap," said he. “ But the real shove was given 
 me by another girl in a little music hall in the docks there, a bit later. 
 Some music hall, godmamma ! Most maritime ! All sailors but 
 me. I expected to be knifed, or doped, at the least. I'd ordered 
 coffee. What a hope ! Coffee nothing ! I made 'em break the 
 neck of a brandy-bottle so that I could be sure what I was drinking 
 hadn't been tampered with. I poured the coffee out on to the floor. 
 And then I made the girl tell me what the medal she was wearing 
 was, and it was Our Lady of Lourdes, and she began to cry and 
 poured out her drink on to the floor. Such a mess ! So I went to 
 Lourdes like the rest of us, apparently, and that finished me." 
 
 44 And that reminds me," said Lady Sophia, determined to change 
 the subject, 44 and why don't you believe in Lourdes, my dear, if 
 you think you ought to ?" 
 
 44 Oh — well, after all, one needn't, need one ? And I live quite 
 among non-Catholics, you know, and one wants to show one's broad- 
 minded, and not to make things harder for them . ♦ . and, well, 
 I did go to Lourdes once; we were staying at Pau, and motored over 
 with the Ecclesleighs. But I didn't see anything like a miracle, 
 and I didn't enjoy it — all the horrid crowds ! So I made dear Lord 
 Eck and Ecclesleigh take me off to Gavarnie for the day." 
 
 44 I bet Hughie wanted to stop at Lourdes," said Cecil. 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 49 
 
 44 Don't know him well enough to judge/' said Lady Sophia. 
 44 But his great-aunt, Susan, was a nice woman, though prehistoric. 
 But, of course, my dear, there's nothing quite so easy as not to see 
 what you're not looking for 1" 
 
 44 I'm always seeing things I don't look for," said Cecil, 44 or 
 even at." 
 
 44 Don't be modern and paradoxical, child 1" said she. 44 Some- 
 times you're very annoying. Because, after all, there's something 
 in what you say." 
 
 44 But isn't there something, too, in the modern instinct ?" said 
 Mrs. Vale, who really was not lacking in pluck. 44 That things like 
 miracles are out of date ?" 
 
 44 There's a deal more in the Catholic instinct," said Lady Sophia, 
 44 that they're neither in nor out. God doesn't trouble about 
 dates." 
 
 But the room was thinning. Mrs. Vale got up to go. 
 
 44 I'm afraid I've shocked you terribly, Lady Sophia," she said, 
 as she shook hands, 44 but I have got my poor little principles." 
 
 Lady Sophia swallowed her rage at the idea that anyone short 
 of the Queen could shock her, in favour of this assertion of principle, 
 and said good-bye most pleasantly, and added: 
 
 44 1 do hope, my dear, you'll look me up in Curzon Street, if you 
 hear I'm in London. We don't entertain at Linborough since my 
 nephew's death. My second nephew, Odo, who's now Lindisfarne, 
 is very seldom there. But in London, do come. Not Mondays, 
 unless you want a crowd. Any other day, if you'll take pity on an 
 old woman. . . ♦ Good-bye !" 
 
 Mrs. Vale retired, walking upon air. 
 
 44 By no means a bad woman," said Lady Sophia, when all our 
 little group had gone. 44 But very silly." 
 
 44 She represses excellent instincts," said Cecil, 44 under second- 
 rate conventions. Hence her absurd behaviour." 
 
 44 Imp 1" cried Lady Sophia. 44 What are you talking about ? 
 And what should you know about it ? She might be your mother 
 twice over." 
 
 44 I doubt it," said he. 44 Barely thirty-five." 
 
 44 Detestable child," she cried, 44 hold your tongue. Barbara, 
 my dear, is she a friend of yours ?" 
 
 44 She showed great pluck," said Barbara, 44 when she became a 
 Catholic. It certainly did seem like the scullery for her. She 
 knew no one. And nobody seemed to want to know her. I can't 
 
 4 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 5o 
 
 imagine a conversion more an affair of conviction, for I don't think 
 she was ever — well, devote.” 
 
 44 And I could tell you young people," said Mr. Travers, who 
 came in after the guests had gone, for functions tired him nowa- 
 days, 44 that she's stuck to it in harder conditions than you'd prob- 
 ably guess. I respect Mrs. Vale, in spite of her silly little ways. 
 She's still cut off from a lot, and apt to fight for crumbs." 
 
 44 I'll see to it that she doesn't have to do that now," said Lady 
 Sophia. 44 She'll respond. She's second-rate now, but she'll 
 become first-rate when once she meets the first-rate." 
 
 Cecil whistled. 
 
 44 And the first-rate's you , venerable lady ?" he asked, almost too 
 cheekily. 
 
 Lady Sophia levelled her brows at him. 
 
 44 I'm proud," she said, 44 of all the breeding God has given me. 
 The best of my breeding has been the Catholic religion. I've had 
 several generations of other good breeding, too. And I'm proud of 
 the lot. She shall learn to be proud of her Catholicism for its own 
 sake, even if I have to use my other assets as a make-weight. And 
 she shall learn to stop propitiating upstarts by petty little broad- 
 mindednesses and finicky unorthodoxy. Yes, I'm very proud of 
 the goodness of God's gifts to me — and not conceited like you, Cecil 
 Calthrop," she added, smiling suddenly. 
 
 44 Oh, not conceited ," he cried. 44 Don't say that. A little vain, 
 perhaps. Childishly, but quite charmingly. Give me time. I'll 
 grow out of it. Meanwhile I, too, has me principles. ..." 
 
 44 I've never heard such a lot about principles," said Blake, 
 abruptly, 44 till I came to this house ! I'm sure I understood what 
 she said about instincts better. I should say that if your instincts 
 are tolerably all jright, as Mr. Calthrop said, what more do you 
 want ?" 
 
 44 Tut, tut," said Lady Sophia. 44 You've got to have a skeleton, 
 though Mrs. Vale would say it was bad taste to talk about it. But 
 you've got to have it. Such a lot of young people are filleted nowa- 
 days ! Though I shouldn't like even this household to walk about 
 with all its ribs sticking out." 
 
 44 You could hook your umbrella," said Cecil , 44 on my ribs." 
 
 44 I value it too much," she said. 44 But with all your faults, I 
 wouldn't call you ribby ." 
 
 44 Padre," said Blake , 44 help me out a bit. I bet you that decent 
 average men, real good men, don't know much about their prin- 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 51 
 
 ciples ! But just follow instinct — feeling. And keep that sound by 
 mixing with other decent men. Follow their conscience. A sort 
 of general decent conscience. What's conscience but instinct, after 
 all ?" 
 
 44 A lot," I said. 44 But I refuse to talk about conscience in a 
 drawing-room. As Mrs. Vale would say, it isn't done* I am a shy 
 Britisher." 
 
 44 But I ought to have an answer." 
 
 44 The answer," said Barbara, “ is in Cecil's chapel at Havre." 
 
 Cecil had shamelessly helped himself to a surviving coffee-eclair, 
 but this statement so startled him that he pinched that collapsible 
 cake harder than he meant to, and a jet of cream shot forth from 
 either end. 
 
 Amid the turmoil, Blake and I escaped. 
 
 “ What did she mean by that last remark?" he said, when we got 
 outside. 
 
 44 D'you think we're all mad ?" I asked. 
 
 “ Not mad ," he said, 44 but really a bit queer. I'm sure I didn't 
 understand any of you. Mrs. Vale. Is she what you call a good 
 Catholic ? I'd have said she was just a worldly sort of snob, and 
 if you met her at Monte — well, you'd see things 1 And does that 
 young blighter, Calthrop, mean himself to be taken seriously ? 
 Either he's bluffing, or he's a bit of a rip, I should say, and if that's 
 so, I consider it irreverent to say all he did say about High Mass 
 and that chapel and — look here, what did Miss Travers mean ?" 
 
 44 And expect you find it hard to reconcile Lady Sophia's religious 
 belief with her very obvious great-lady-ishness ?" 
 
 " Oh well, she's another generation." 
 
 “ But she's as alert and interested as ever she was ! And really 
 she's very humble. She was thinking how she could help Mrs 
 Vale all the time. And she's done a lot for Calthrop." 
 
 44 Young blighter," he repeated. 
 
 " Well, listen. The point really is this: What would he and Mrs. 
 Vale be without their religion ? It's true he's never had to fight 
 outside circumstances as Mrs. Vale has. No one cared a curse 
 when he became a Catholic, or if they did, he found it all too easy 
 not to care whether they cared. He's a horribly independent kid. 
 But he has had to fight himself, and has to now. He's really a lazy, 
 sensual young cynic, and as sceptical as if he were forty; he certainly 
 does bluff a good deal, but also he takes the — well, deceptiveness off 
 his bluffing by playing the obvious fool, and meanwhile, he's very 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 52 
 
 circumspectly building himself up with the help of the most rigid 
 principles* Yes — principles ! And as for Mrs* Vale, I remember 
 all about her, now* She became a Catholic more or less as a girl; 
 then she married a rich man, but a lot beneath her, and he's treated 
 her shockingly* Nothing could be easier for her than to get a 
 divorce, but, as a Catholic, she won't* She's cut off from her real 
 environment, and she can't — in fact, she oughtn't to — mix with his; 
 so she's a lonely woman and apt, as Mr* Travers said, to fight for 
 unimportant crumbs of cake, finding the — er — Bread of Life very 
 dry indeed* Yes, I mean it* She's not all she ought to be, else 
 probably she wouldn't find it dry, or could be content with the dry- 
 ness; but she's got it in her to learn; she's never spoilt her palate; 
 and Lady Sophia, who won't flatter her, will teach her how mucky 
 the cake-crumbs are*" 
 
 44 Well, but I say, what did Miss Travers mean ? That's what I 
 want to know*" 
 
 44 I'll tell you now," said I* 44 Calthrop mentioned a Chapel of 
 the Sacred Heart* By the Sacred Heart we mean, partly, the Love 
 of Jesus Christ, God made man for men * All these people we've 
 talked about have a skeleton of 4 principles,' as we've said* You 
 wanted 4 feeling.' Barbara was suggesting you were both right. 
 She meant, a skeleton's not much use without — well, flesh on it, and 
 unless it's alive and fully human* Well* Jesus Christ is that* I've 
 said again and again that the principles you've got to have come 
 from God, and in the long run are God* But God — took flesh* 
 The whole of our religion is Our Lord, Jesus Christ* A person. 
 If a man once gets hold of that he needn't theorize much* He can 
 let himself go a good deal to the instincts roused in him by associating 
 with — well, with his friend* See ?" 
 
 44 By Jove," he said , 44 this is getting into deep waters." 
 
 44 There's deeper yet," I answered* 
 
Chapter VII 
 
 M EANWHILE, the Sergeant, as I still found it difficult not to 
 call him, was getting on extremely well in his new post* 
 In the Travers's house he wore a cloth suit, but when he 
 came across for his afternoon work at the Guild offices he wore grey 
 flannel trousers and a Norfolk jacket, and they suited him very well* 
 He educated himself with great rapidity, and, living as he did, sur- 
 rounded with books and often taking down reviews of them in 
 shorthand and then typing his own work out, he was becoming 
 well-informed and able to express himself to the point* I foresaw 
 the day when he would speak quite forcibly and reliably in public* 
 I went to the office one afternoon and saw him sitting unusually 
 upright at his machine, typing away with an air of importance* A 
 lady, with her back turned, was examining books in a corner, and 
 in the dark little room I didn't even try to see who she was* 
 
 ** Hullo, Jack," I said, going up to him* ** How's life ?•" 
 
 “ Very fair, thank you, Father," said he; u I've a bit of news for 
 you later on* But I think here's someone you know*" 
 
 I turned round, and lo, Miss Silver, smiling rather nervously 
 through the shadows* 
 
 “ How very astonishing !" I cried, and shook hands* 44 What on 
 earth brings you here ?" 
 
 44 1 know I ought to apologise for not calling first," she said* 44 But 
 every now and again, when I'm going to London, I have to change 
 at Wilchurch, and between the two trains I just have time to slip 
 up here and look at this dear old house and peer round the library,. 
 I know how busy you are, and I — I didn't dare to let you know*" 
 
 44 1 wish you had ! However, I'm sure Mr* Raikes has done the 
 honours properly*" 
 
 The Sergeant didn't look round, but even in that light I could 
 see the back of his neck get quite red* 
 
 44 He's been most helpful," she said* 44 There was so much I 
 wanted to ask, and he's given me a lot of useful names*" 
 
 53 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 54 
 
 “ How are things going at Bidmoor ?" 
 
 44 Well — so so ! Better than worse, I hope ! But — well, I've 
 rather quarrelled. At least not quarrelled , but after seeing how you 
 all went to work, and your Lancashireman , I simply couldn't content 
 myself with our dilettante little meetings about Dante and Bees and 
 Futurism, and I said, we must be serious . And, well, you know, 
 they wouldn't be serious. I mean they always took themselves 
 seriously, of course; and their silly little way of being — well, arch 
 and humorous, and having silly little inner-circle sort of catch- 
 words isn't what I mean by not being serious. ♦ ♦ ♦ But I said one 
 day, 4 Look here, my dear people, the long and short of it is we're 
 not being serious ♦ We're very ignorant. We never work back to 
 principles ' " 
 
 I sighed. The 44 principle-motif " had been rather heavily 
 played upon, I felt, of late. However, I applauded her sentiment. 
 
 44 And you fell out on that ?" 
 
 44 Well, it was never quite the same. And I and two or three 
 others" (the Sergeant stopped, with his fingers in the air . ♦ .), 
 “ all girls , I'm afraid, the men would not be interested " (the 
 Sergeant went on typing), “ have tried to — well, be serious as well 
 as take ourselves seriously." 
 
 44 What's your method ?" 
 
 44 Well, we sit and either we read a bit out of a newspaper, or even 
 one of us says the first sentence that comes into her head, and the 
 moment we are not quite sure what a sentence means, or a word, we 
 stop, and say , 4 What does that mean, exactly ?' or * My dear, what 
 do you mean exactly by 44 democrat," or 44 convention," or — or 
 “ psychic " or 44 telepathy," ' and if we can't answer we fine one 
 another, and you'd be astonished how it mounts up !" 
 
 44 What do you spend it on ?" 
 
 44 Well — we thought we ought to have a little relaxation. Choco- 
 lates l" 
 
 44 Excellent ! But isn't it rather — scattered ? Don't you want 
 to get a little more shape about it all ?" 
 
 44 Yes, indeed we do ! And we also read the Guild's Primer of 
 Social Science, and were astonished to find how commonsense and 
 un-Roman-Catholic it is — at least, I mean " she hesitated* 
 
 44 Yes, yes, of course ! You mean how what you see to be 
 naturally right and just is part and parcel of Catholic belief and 
 practice ?" 
 
 44 Well, I was going to say, how Catholics seem to be not so very 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 55 
 
 special in this department, anyhow* But Til put it in your way, if 
 you like*” 
 
 44 Well, it's a true way* I had a friend who came to me 
 seriously annoyed, because — he was a student of social history — he 
 said he was afraid he'd got to become a Catholic, because he found 
 that whatever he'd independently liked — liberty, fraternity, true 
 methods of association, and so on — were not only essential in the 
 Catholic scheme, but had been always taught by the Church, very 
 clearly, very undilutedly, and for reasons both commonsense and 
 sublime*” 
 
 “ Dear me,” she said , 44 how very odd*” 
 
 44 No,” I said, 44 if the Church is right in calling herself Catholic 
 in every substantial way* She's universal* Nothing that's real — 
 and only true things are real — is left out of her, and all of all of it 
 is in her*” 
 
 44 That's almost a frightening notion, I should think, for a Catholic* 
 You'd feel you had so much more than you can manage*” 
 
 44 It manages us, or ought to*” 
 
 44 Oh dear, Catholicism is so very different from what I used to 
 think it was 1” 
 
 44 Listen* May I make you a sort of explanation ! Or give you 
 — well, just topics which you might think over; and if any appeal to 
 you particularly, work those out a little* I'm sure Mr* Raikes will 
 be able to put you on to the right books, or the right section of the 
 library, anyway; then you might go on arranging your trains to 
 London, in view of a visit here 1” 
 
 She blushed and looked away, for she'd realized that I had per- 
 fectly well recalled there was no reason whatever for her to change 
 at Wilchurch on her way from Bidmoor to London* 
 
 “ Well, I think by now that you will see that the principles of 
 social economics, anyway, that you can recognize as valid and 
 enduring, all work into the Catholic scheme* They don't anything 
 like exhaust the Catholic doctrine about society, but if you examine 
 the Catholic system, you find, from that end, that it possesses elements 
 that include your valid natural principles of justice and human 
 life, and so on* And people who know, tell me that one of the 
 most marked undercurrents of popular feeling and opinion is towards 
 just those principles* So that makes one optimist* Then, politi- 
 cally, look at all the heaving, restless struggle of opinion making 
 towards the ideal of a League of Nations* I don't mean any par- 
 ticular league necessarily, but a League* Then work downwards 
 
56 MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 from Catholic doctrine, and you'll see that it necessarily goes towards 
 a brotherhood of Nations, and very nearly created it in the Middle 
 Ages* When Christendom broke up, it did so because nationalism 
 grew so exaggerated that first you had nation against nation, and 
 then groups of nations opposed, and then the Balance of Power, 
 which has just collapsed so badly* That was a very cynical idea; an 
 equilibrium of mutually disliking groups, not a firm union of love. 
 Now, what the Church can do, is to pick out all the good elements 
 in the new popular desire, if it exists, and show how good they are, 
 and then, how she has always said they were good, and has offered 
 as good and better*" 
 
 “ If I may interrupt," said the Sergeant, 44 1 have been endeavour- 
 ing to put that to Miss Silver on more than one occasion*" 
 
 “ Well, we both thank you*" 
 
 “ I do, Fm sure," she said* 44 Mr* Raikes has made it so much 
 clearer*" 
 
 “ Well, if only I were a philosopher I'd go right to the opposite 
 extreme and tell you something he won't have talked to you 
 about* I'll just mention it* Ever since the German philosopher, 
 Kant " 
 
 The Sergeant gave a loud chuckle, begged my pardon, and pro- 
 ceeded violently with his typing* When I had recovered from my 
 surprise, I proceeded* 
 
 “ Well, ever since then, it's been the fashion to say we only know 
 our own ideas — our own feelings — don't know outside things with 
 any certainty at all; and that still less can we attach any intrinsic 
 value to ideas like cause or effect, or even God* The essence 
 of Protestantism is in that, really ! It's individualism run wild* 
 When people gave up thinking in terms of Christendom they thought 
 in terms of nations, as I told you, and finally, in terms just of them- 
 selves* One result of that was Pantheism — everything was your - 
 self , and as far as God meant anything, you were God, too* Or if 
 you didn't run to that sort of mystical v/ay of looking at things, but 
 had a practical temperament, the cult of self led to just self-realiza- 
 tion, as they said; to the Superman, who cares for nothing but 
 himself* Now, not only that's dead against all Catholic doctrine, 
 but I'm told there are signs of a swing-back among quite non- 
 Catholic thinkers, when they've seen what nonsense, or what horrible 
 results it will lead to." 
 
 “ As a matter of fact, Mr* Raikes did tell me something about that 
 very topic." 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 57 
 
 " Did you, Jack ?" 
 
 In his extreme shyness he reverted almost to the military manner, 
 swivelled round in his chair, fixed his eyes about an inch above my 
 head, dropped his hands to his side (for he couldn't exactly stand/ 
 after all, to attention) and recited: 
 
 44 Mr. Winterton, Father, having had occasion to mention to me 
 the series of simple Philosophical Handbooks the Guild is bringing 
 out, I took the liberty of asking him what philosophy might really 
 be, me having heard the word but never understanding it properly. 
 And Mr. Winterton, he very kindly took me over part of the ground 
 himself, and partly to make sure I'd properly understood his ex- 
 planations, and if I'm to tell the truth I make no doubt through me 
 having something of a swollen head as regards the whole matter, I 
 put the main points in due order to Miss Silver on her next visit." 
 
 He ceased abruptly. 
 
 “ Very good," I said , 44 you are dismissed." 
 
 He stared, grinned suddenly, and plunged back to his 
 work. 
 
 44 Now," I said, 44 since I can trust to the Sergeant for your 
 philosophic illumination, and since I know you like psychology, 
 and since I like history, I shall make a remark or two about what's 
 going on in those departments, unless, of course, I shall make you 
 late for your train." 
 
 She smiled wanly, and told me there were several. 
 
 44 Well, you told me Miss Newton had been discussing this new 
 psychology which everyone's talking about. She said that every- 
 thing you thought or ever did could be reduced to the automatic 
 working out of a few primary instincts about which you knew nothing 
 except that they existed, and which either had free exit, in which 
 case you were normal, or were repressed and forced their way out 
 distorted, in which case you were an eccentric. That, she said, 
 explains Man. All the things you think are so noble and beautiful 
 are really illusions, sort of shadow-spectres, thrown on the clouds 
 outside you by these instincts in you. Well, even if all the facts she 
 relates are observed facts, and rightly observed, they don't explain 
 men any more than you've explained a working electrical machine 
 when you've catalogued the rods and wheels. There's the electric 
 spark which must be there, and which is different from rods and 
 wheels. It explains why they move, but they don't explain it, 
 though it's got to be there if they are to move. Very well. As this 
 new science advances, people begin to see the same sort of thing. 
 
58 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 It explains some of the machinery of mind, but it doesn't explain 
 mind. It exacts the existence of something special which they call 
 4 psychic energy/ Something quite different from even that 
 mysterious fact they call 4 physical energy/ Now Catholic phil- 
 osophy, by another road, proves that something which it calls 
 4 spirit 9 exists, and Catholic psychology shows that one element in 
 us is spiritual. And when we talk of spirit as united with matter 
 in such a way as to make one complete substance, in the way that 
 a human person is one, we call it 4 soul '; and when we speak of it 
 more precisely as working in with that matter — i.e., the body and 
 the brain in particular — we can call it 4 mind/ But it's all the same 
 thing. So the special psychic energy which the new psychologist 
 reaches is the special work of that special stuff which we've always 
 believed to exist and have called 4 spirit ' or 4 soul ' or 4 mind.' 
 And two more points. If it's a thoroughly different sort of thing 
 to the brain and the body, it didn't evolve out of that, and the old 
 crude theory of evolution of everything out of one thing gets another 
 knock. You can put things in a regular series of more and more 
 perfect, if you like; but it's not one thing continually becoming more 
 perfect. And finally, I think I told you that the same students are 
 beginning to recognize what they call the dynamic value of ideas — 
 that is, that ideas do a work that instinct can't, and that it's their 
 business to govern and put order in all that shapeless instinct. 
 But they also are recognizing that that's just what they can't do, 
 unless they're believed to be true. And it's impossible to believe 
 they are if you suspect they aren't; for instance, I shan't get any 
 better if I think the doctor isn't telling me the truth when he tells 
 me I am better. So the Pragmatist philosophy which was so 
 fashionable, and said that you couldn't ever tell if a thing was 
 true, but only whether it worked, and then it was true for you f 
 well, that gets a nasty knock, too. For unless you can believe 
 a thing's true in itself, it won't work, and Pragmatism fails 
 pragmatically." 
 
 44 I don't follow the last part," she said, meekly. 44 But I'd love 
 to learn some more about evolution." 
 
 44 Some day," I said, 44 and Mr. Raikes, I'm sure, can do that 
 part, too. But let's get to something much more concrete. Take 
 history. I'll be short, but I do want to touch on most of the main 
 topics you might like to think about." 
 
 44 I always feel I don't really know history," she cried. 44 I 
 mean, I read and I read, but I can't get a general impression 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 59 
 
 that I can feel is true. Can one trust English History 
 books ?” 
 
 44 Sergeant,” I said, 44 what do you mean by not giving Miss 
 Silver some general impressions she can trust ?” 
 
 44 I made bold,” he said, rather haughtily , 44 to indicate to her such 
 articles in the Catholic Encyclopedia as you advised me to read 
 myself, and I trust I wasn't wrong. I also referred her to 
 your reverence for further general impressions,” said he, quite 
 wickedly. 
 
 44 It is true, Jack,” said I, with propitiatory meekness, 44 that for 
 detail work I can't compete with you. Still, it is useful to provide 
 general ideas — sort of frameworks, or organic notions, and even 
 picturesque views, isn't it, so as to be able to make something solid , 
 and also living out of the details ?” 
 
 He grunted, and was evidently most pleased at having established 
 his position. 
 
 “ Well,” I said to Miss Silver, 44 I want to point out that I con- 
 sider there've been two great swing-backs, so to say, in modern 
 historical work. One concerns the Middle Ages. They used to 
 be treated as a sort of blank period or barbaric, or at least no better 
 than romantic and productive of Cathedrals. But now people are 
 beginning to realize what a wonderful society there was then, and 
 how active; and how much thought. The Renaissance is getting 
 dislodged; its real contribution was much more imitative than 
 creative, and anarchic than constructive. Luther and Calvin are 
 quite pushed off their pedestals, for different reasons, I confess; 
 and as for Henry VIII. and Elizabeth, and poor little Edward VI., 
 even, as far as the Reformation goes — well, no one now ought to 
 think much of them. They were engaged in cutting England off 
 from the immemorial civilization of Europe, and they succeeded all 
 too well. The substitution of their authority for the old authority 
 of Christendom was a mere first step — because it was so ridiculous 
 — to the throwing off of all authority altogether, which is what we're 
 tending to, ever since we realized that the modern State tends to be 
 the Almighty Tyrant which replaces royal absolutism. Now, lots 
 of holes can be picked in that, but it's a general impression, I assure 
 you, you can trust. Miss Silver I And Mr. Raikes shall fill in 
 details.” 
 
 The Sergeant's mind had meanwhile taken its rather stately way 
 towards repentance. 
 
 u Fve already tried to do so. Father,” he said, 44 by taking Miss 
 
6o 
 
 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 Silver round the Cathedral like you did me. In the absence of 
 yourself, we used the local guide, but I was able to repeat much 
 that you had said in the days when you took me there in a chair. 
 And this time/' he added superbly, 44 there was n't no nonsense — any 
 nonsense — with the verger. Right round we went. And I en- 
 deavoured to draw lessons." 
 
 44 And I was most grateful," she cried. 44 I saw it all with different 
 eyes ! I got so enthusiastic that I crawled right into St. William's 
 tomb. . . 
 
 The Sergeant suddenly covered his mouth with his hand to hide 
 a grin at I know not what memory. Then he turned scarlet, and 
 typed furiously. 
 
 44 The other great swing-back," I said, 44 is this. Non-Catholics 
 used to make out that Roman Catholicism really began in the Middle 
 Ages. When they began to know more about the Middle Ages they 
 pushed its beginning back — oh, say, to St. Augustine, about four 
 hundred. And since then, right to the very first generation after 
 the Apostles. All the structural elements of Catholicism are seen 
 alive and working then. And even more generally than that, the fact 
 that the Church was a corporation, an organic concrete social fact, 
 and that Christianity never was a sort of pious mood merely — a 
 religious vapour taking shapes and colours from whatever blew upon 
 it and shone upon it, finally being condensed and bottled up, so to 
 say, into a bottle supplied by a series of flukes, so that it turned into 
 the Church as we know it — well, that's more and more recognized. 
 From the outset the Christian religion was a Catholic Church; 
 hierarchical, sacramental. This is so true that scholars began to say 
 the early Church borrowed her sacraments and formulas and so on 
 from pagan systems round about her; but they oughtn't to say that 
 any more; that theory, too, is out of date. And even the Gospels, 
 well, the Church has always believed they were written by the people 
 they profess to have been written by, and at certain traditional dates, 
 say, for the first three, from 6o to 70 a.d. Fifty years ago, however, 
 the modern civilization of that time would have called Catholics 
 perfect fools for maintaining that, and no doubt did, and lots of 
 people still do. But they don't realize that criticism has swung very 
 far back indeed, and that very un-Catholic minded students now say 
 about the Gospels pretty well what we do, and always did. So even 
 in your study of history. Miss Silver, I believe it will pay you to see 
 what the Church believes on certain topics, and use that as a sign- 
 post. I believe you'll find it points to what every kind of science is 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 61 
 
 more and more realising to be true each in its own independent way * 
 In fact, if Catholics are 4 out of date ' it's because they're a little 
 ahead of their times !" 
 
 The Sergeant was pursuing some dream of his own, and said 
 nothing, though I gave him the chance* 
 
 44 One thing more, Miss Silver* Work back like that, and you 
 discover at a certain date, say 100 a*d*, an extraordinary going 
 concern, the Catholic Church* A whole Christian folk, very soon 
 spreading from Spain to Persia, and from Tyneside to the Sahara, 
 all thinking the same, all feeling the same, all ready to die in thou- 
 sands in incredible torments — slaves, soldiers, children, aged bishops, 
 great ladies and repentant sinners — for their faith* A hundred 
 years before that you find nothing that can account for that* Lots, 
 no doubt, that is far more intelligible once the Church exists, and 
 throws light backward, but nothing which is any sort of sufficient 
 cause for that phenomenon of the Church* So its cause was in 
 between* And it can only be what the Church with one voice 
 said it was, and says, namely, Jesus Christ* It was for Him 
 they died; for a Person; for better than father or mother or 
 lover*" 
 
 The Sergeant stirred* 
 
 44 Them days was good," he said, quietly, 44 in the hospital. 
 And the first best day was the one when you told about the Prodigal 
 Son, by the fire* Never got over that, the Corporal didn't* Reckon 
 I f ve come home* Reckon he's got to* And I've that bit of news to 
 tell you afterwards, Father," he said, more briskly* 44 But you 
 finish v/hat you're going to say, first*" 
 
 44 Only this. Jack — if I may say so, Miss Silver, study Jesus Christ 
 and His revelation* You'll see then what it all flows from and goes 
 back to* Let me look for a small book that may help you — you can 
 take it " 
 
 I went off into the shadows, for Miss Silver stood nervous, twist- 
 ing the cords of her little bag* There is always a certain shock 
 when a soul encounters Christ* 
 
 I came back in a moment* 
 
 “ Why shouldn't we," said I, 44 go and get some tea ?" 
 
 "To the Too Too Tea-rooms," she cried, clapping her 
 hands* 
 
 44 So you know them ?" 
 
 44 I ” said she and the Sergeant simultaneously, and then 
 
 stopped* 
 
62 
 
 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 44 What were you both going to say ?" I asked. 
 
 44 Of course I saw them when I was staying here in the summer/' 
 said Miss Silver, elusively. 
 
 The Sergeant looked reproachfully at her. 
 
 44 Why, that was where I took you. Miss Silver/' he said , 44 when 
 we'd finished the Cathedral. Telling you it was the Reverend 
 Father's favourite place." 
 
 This astonishing information — both parts of it — left me speechless; 
 so without more discussion, we proceeded with much dignity (for 
 I might have said the bull-dog had come with me) to the Too Too 
 Tea-rooms. The rooms were unchanged; the same three instru- 
 ments exhaled their hesitating souls in much the same music; only 
 the people there were different — not so happy, surely, as when the 
 timid Tommies were being supplied with tiny teas. ... I missed 
 the blue flannel and red ties, and the big rough overcoats, and oh ! 
 how I missed the Corporal ! Even from the Sergeant, something 
 had evaporated and was lost, though he'd gained so much, I knew. 
 We sat down at our old table. I had some snap-shots with me, by 
 good luck, and showed Miss Silver the Sergeant as he was then, and 
 Hallinan, and little Jock, and Francis Newnes, then Corporal, now 
 Mister. She was enchanted with him, and grew so enthusiastic 
 over his forelock that the Sergeant, moved by some primary emotion, 
 suddenly announced, with vast severity: 
 
 44 Silly, I called it. But erratic he was, and ever will be." 
 
 44 Now tell me your news," said I. 
 
 He looked deprecatingly at Miss Silver. 
 
 “ You'll forgive me, Miss Silver," said he, 44 if I tell the Father 
 what perhaps you won't quite sympathize with. My old mother," 
 said he, turning back to me , 44 is to become a Catholic." His state- 
 liness fell off him like a cloak; he turned red, grinned all across his 
 broad and honest face, and punched me very hard on the chest, quite 
 as he'd done on that distant Whitsun-eve. . ♦ . 
 
 “ My dear Jack ! I am delighted ! Be delighted, Miss Silver ! 
 I assure you it's worth it." 
 
 And I told her quickly about that heroic old lady, managing her 
 household so vigorously despite her terrible crippled state (she had 
 no arms); giving her three sons to the war; going of her own free- 
 will, lest she should be an encumbrance, to the Refuge, where she 
 still was, being too weak now to be moved; writing her letters with 
 that pencil strapped so that she could hold it in her teeth, and 
 collecting pence for her boy in hospital by singing her little songs. 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 63 
 
 Miss Silver mopped her eyes quite unaffectedly* 
 
 44 An' you remember that old badge/' he cried, 44 that was given 
 me by the mamselle " (he glanced maliciously at Miss Silver, but 
 she only smiled), 44 and how I worked it on to that square of old- 
 gold silk, an' how you made me crosses an' alphas and omegas an' 
 a wreath of flowers an' such to decorate it ? Well, I sends it to her, 
 an' she's that proud of it she has it put up beside her and won't have 
 it down ; and they all asks her about it, and she don't know how to 
 go to explain it, and on my first leave I tell her all about it, and that 
 Mrs* Wroxton, she tells her more, and the priest, he notices it and 
 tells her more , an' someone starts chippin' her about receiving 
 valentines from her pal, much as I used to think those badges were; 
 and she ups and she'll have none of it, but she explains what she's 
 learnt it means, and in her heart she's thinking what it means to met 
 me being her favourite, though why, I don't know, my brothers 
 bein' worth a dozen of a chap like me* P'raps that's why," he said, 
 meditatively, and quite forgetting Miss Silver, and I daresay me, 
 44 Never any too satisfactory, I wasn't* Both headstrong and stupid ♦ 
 Never took advice and never acted really sensible on my own account* 
 Worried her terribly, I did, but always came back when in trouble, 
 or rather, not till I'd got out of it, for I was powerful obstinate* But, 
 however," said he, pulling himself together, 44 she gets the idea 
 that the Heart of God has been with me and carin' for me, 
 and — well, Father, it's topsy-turvy, I know, but I can't help it, 
 for it's like that, I'm sure, and there's many a mother I'm sure, 
 too, it would be like that for — once she gets it into her head that 
 the Heart of God loves me, she loves it back more than ever she 
 could if it had just loved her, she loves it all over again when she 
 understands I love it, which I do," he said, looking at me with 
 great dog-like eyes, almost as Hallinan used to do, 44 an' I tell 
 her all about the Jock saying Communion was the one thing, 
 and she begins to want it too, wanting to be in God's Heart, 
 and may I be forgiven if I say what I shouldn't, wanting to get 
 God into herself in a manner of speakin' and hug Him in a 
 manner of speakin' — an' oh lor, I'm afraid I'm talking a deal of 
 nonsense*" 
 
 44 So your dear mother's decided on being a Catholic, Jack," I 
 said, after waiting a little* 
 
 44 She has that, Father* And Mrs* Wroxton, she wrote to me 
 to-day to say it could be quickly done, for like a child she is; takes 
 to it like a fish in water, if you take me*" 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 64 
 
 “ This is the crown to your happiness, Jack,” I said* 44 We'll all 
 thank God together*” 
 
 Miss Silver then said rather chokily that she must go and catch 
 her train, and I answered that if she didn't mind. I'd ask Mr* Raikes 
 to escort her to the station as I had an enormous number of letters 
 to write, which was not only, I considered, truthful, but certainly 
 tactful, too* 
 
Chapter Vlil 
 
 Q UITE late in December I was walking along the tow-path by 
 our river Hale when Reggie Orwylstree caught me up* It 
 isn't much of a river, but it has its charms, especially when 
 it broadens out, and on an afternoon like this* There was a mist, of 
 course, but the sun was bright behind it; it was surprising how many 
 leaves remained, shining a strong gold, on the trees nearer the 
 town; old buildings stood among them, they, too, brown-golden 
 or almost copper colour, and the shadows were every blue, from 
 sapphire blue to peacock* And over it all, softening, fusing it, 
 the mist drew silver veils* 
 
 We said " Hullo " to one another; Reggie said he'd come my way 
 for a bit, and then we relapsed into the silence of friendship* 
 
 At last he said: 
 
 " This fellow Blake is getting a bit of a strain*" 
 
 44 Oh! How?" 
 
 " Positively haunts me*" 
 
 " Since you're billeted at Bursdon ?" 
 
 44 That's right* Constantly over on his motor-bike and wants 
 to take me out in his side-car*" 
 
 "Rather flattering, isn't it? Or perhaps he's got no friends 
 near Hanton*" 
 
 44 Dozens* Popular sort of chap, apparently*" 
 
 44 Well, don't you like him ?" 
 
 44 Oh, I like him all right*" 
 
 44 Well, what's the matter ? So do I* So do we all, as far as I 
 know*" 
 
 He heaved a portentous sigh* 44 It's all most deucealy com- 
 plicated* Everything was comfortable till he came*" 
 
 I didn't think it complicated at all, but I merely told him to 
 behave decently, anyway* 
 
 44 Oh, I'll behave decently," he said* Then he added : 44 It must 
 be rotten for padres always having to feel alike to everyone*" 
 
 6 5 5 
 
66 
 
 MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 44 I don't.” 
 
 44 Well, to behave as if you did; that's worse/' 
 
 44 Well, in another sense I do* There's always one or two 
 large things that are true about everybody, and they're apt to 
 swamp the minor differences, or, at any rate, keep 'em quite 
 secondary*" 
 
 44 What d'you mean ?" 
 
 44 You know perfectly well*" 
 
 44 You make me tired when you're pious," he said, but 
 smiling* 44 Of course, I needn't say old Blake is always catechizing 
 me about the Catholic religion* Well, I don't know anything 
 about it*" 
 
 44 Don't be silly* You know quite enough* After all, you're a 
 convert yourself*" 
 
 44 Oh, ages ago, just after I left the 'Varsity*" 
 
 44 Well, you've learnt a lot since* I hope you aren't tongue-tied 
 when Blake asks you things* It's much better you should explain 
 than I*" 
 
 44 But I tell you he's a bit of a strain* He asks me no end of 
 questions out of a little book*" He glared at me indignantly* 
 
 44 Well," I said* 44 Don't blame me* I don't particularly want 
 him to have a little book* I didn't give him any* I don't even 
 know what he's got* If anything, I want to keep him off little books* 
 I want to keep him to principles*" 
 
 44 If you ask me, he's getting a bit fed up with principles* He 
 says he hasn't got any, or if he has he doesn't know what they are* 
 In fact, I think he thinks it a bit indecent to talk about that sort of 
 thing* He said he thought decent average men got along all right 
 without 'em, or without discussing 'em, anyway; like healthy people 
 and their livers*" 
 
 44 I know; he said just the same sort of thing to me* And I agreed* 
 We don't talk about 'em* Barbara doesn't explain her principles 
 to you, that I know of* Nor I mine to her* Because we're healthy 
 living Catholics, and, as you say, we take 'em for granted* But we 
 have them, and we ought to know them, and then keep healthy and 
 just live. But he's like a man — oh well, he can't do any of the 
 Catholic things because he knows nothing of the Catholic life, 
 nor that he's half dead, from that point of view* It's no good 
 plaguing him with no end of details when he hasn't got the main 
 ideas* You can't start building your house from the chimney 
 downwards*" 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 67 
 
 44 But I thought you told me I ought to answer him when he asks ?" 
 44 Oh, Lord, yes* Tell him what we do, so that you can clear the 
 ground of mistakes* He probably thinks we believe images are 
 alive, or that the Pope's God, or something* But if you can, show 
 him the idea of the thing — Purgatory, for instance — in an accurate 
 way; but always point out it joins on to something much deeper* 
 Drive him back to the bottom-most* God; his immortal soul; sin; 
 revelation; Jesus Christ*" 
 
 He looked very worried* 
 
 44 I'd feel such a damned hypocrite," he said* 
 
 44 Not at all* You're not a hypocrite* You've got a very good 
 record, all things considered* You aren't even rickety nowadays* 
 You go ahead and tell him*" 
 
 44 I'm not exactly a pyramid, you know* Things still upset me, 
 on and off*" 
 
 I have a great respect as well as affection for Reggie, so I told him 
 he was all right, and then said: 
 
 44 You'll do him a good service if you do no more than make him 
 understand religion isn't effervescent piety, or odds and ends of 
 behaviour, but a very practical logical working out of — well, princi- 
 ples* Sorry, but I can't help it*" 
 
 44 It's all very well* You know I'm not emotional* But he's got 
 to feel something or other* Else it'll just stay an affair of theory for 
 him, even if he sees it*" 
 
 44 Well, on the whole. I'd trust God for that part* However, if 
 you 4 feel,' don't sheepishly pretend you don't* Of course, you'll 
 never pretend you do when you don't* As a matter of fact, I was 
 trying to engineer a sort of transition to this sort of thing after he 
 and I left the Travers's after Barbara's birthday party*" 
 
 44 What d'you mean by transition ?" 
 
 44 I was trying to get him across from too much abstract prin- 
 ciple to — to Our Lord*" 
 
 44 Oh, I see*" 
 
 44 Cecil Calthrop mentioned the Sacred Heart* Well, there you 
 are* • The Incarnation* All our principles are true; but we're 
 meant to see them incarnate* We're meant to* To learn about God 
 in Jesus Christ, or through Him* Religion isn't a theory, nor yet 
 just an institution* It's a Person*" 
 
 I was touched to see a sort of sadness come into his expression* 
 44 Henceforward," I continued, 44 it's all personal* Our Lord is a 
 person, and He wants us to think of God as Father*" 
 
68 
 
 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 44 It's odd* One's accustomed to think of Christ as — oh 
 well in Holy Communion and being crucified, and so on* But, 
 somehow, one never thinks of Him as having told us very 
 much about God* Does one think about * God ' much ? I 
 don't know* I dare say I do* But I don't think about thinking 
 about God*" 
 
 44 Well, He did tell us, you know — in fact, it's the centre — a sort 
 of fountain — of His revelation* It was new* Even for the Jews, 
 in the mass* God — not just creator and master, nor King nor 
 Father even of a people — but Father of each soul — all that's lovable 
 in human fatherhood first of all, and far better, in Him; and all the 
 consequences with regard to one's fellow-men, who are all His sons, 
 and our brothers* That's one of the large things that tends to push 
 down personal likes and dislikes to quite a low place* It brings in 
 love, you know*" 
 
 44 Oh, Lord !" he cried* 44 It's a queer thing, all this love busi- 
 ness* * * *" 
 
 He stopped, and leant over the railing of a little bridge* 
 
 Yellow leaves floated by, and the warm December was silent all 
 around us* I waited a little to let the image of Barbara flicker out of 
 his half-awareness* Then he said: 
 
 “ But do I love God ? Do I ? Do I — like Him as much as — 
 well, as anyone I do like ?" 
 
 44 The deeper love is, the more silent and less tumultuous it 
 becomes, I suppose* You notice the sea more when it's stormy* 
 But storms aren't the sea* True love goes straight into service* 
 Service of the person you love and of persons he or she loves* You 
 don't have to talk a lot* You hardly have to feel you feel* * * * 
 You just do* * . *" 
 
 “ All the same," he said astonishingly, “ there's moments when 
 I could hug God*" 
 
 So he and the Sergeant met there* * * * 
 
 Bells began to chime in Wilchurch* Fountains of praise rose 
 from the old towers, and all creation stirred together and aroused 
 itself to hymn the revelation of the sons of God* The willow 
 trees and the river swam before my eyes for a moment and then 
 vanished* Then Reggie's voice recalled me, saying he had to be 
 getting back* 
 
 44 Come to tea with Barbara," said I* “ I'm going*" 
 
 44 Can't," he answered, walking very fast* 
 
 “ Where are you going ?" 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 69 
 
 “ Tea with Blake* At the Club/' 
 
 “ The Club teas/' said I, “ are getting worse and worse*" And 
 we grumbled peaceably together till we parted at Curfew Corner* 
 ****** 
 
 I, however, went on to tea, as I'd said, to the Travers's* Barbara 
 was writing in the drawing-room, and Mr* Travers was dosing by the 
 fire, and just nodded and smiled to me* The drawing-room was 
 unlit save by this fire, and two candles at the far end, on Barbara's 
 writing-table* They shone in her hair* 
 
 “ Oh !" she cried, when I came in* 44 Thank goodness you've 
 come*" And she flung down her pen* 
 
 44 Thank you," I said* 44 What were you doing ?" 
 
 “ C*W*L*," she answered, crossing to the fire* She sat down by 
 it, on a stool* Then she suddenly said: 
 
 44 Reggie Orwylstree is a very exorbitant young man*" 
 
 I swallowed a smile, but said nothing* 
 
 44 Don't you want to know why ?" she asked* 
 
 “ Very much*" 
 
 44 I had to do all these letters, and he wanted me to go for a walk 
 with him*" 
 
 44 Oh, I met him* We went on a bit together* I thought he 
 seemed rather sulky*" 
 
 “ What did he talk about ?" 
 
 44 How bad the teas are getting at the Club* So did I*" 
 
 " Oh Father l What else ?" 
 
 44 On the importance of having High Principles*" 
 
 44 Didn't he say anything about me ?" 
 
 “ Alas, alas, my poor Barbara ! I believe we forgot to till the 
 very end* Then I asked him to come to tea here and he said he 
 was going to see Captain Blake*" 
 
 44 That's another very encroaching youth," she remarked* 
 
 “ Whom does he encroach on ?" 
 
 “ Me, of course." 
 
 “ Oh l" 
 
 44 He's always round, asking things*" 
 
 “ About Catholicism ?" 
 
 44 Oh, dear no 1" she exclaimed, sitting bolt upright* 44 Why 
 should he ? He isn't thinking of becoming a Catholic, is he ?" 
 
 “ How should I know ?" 
 
 44 Oh, for goodness' sake don't be discreet " 
 
 “ I'm very sorry*" 
 
70 MR, FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 44 Now you're being meek ! That's worse ! I can't possibly 
 bear it, ♦ ♦ . Do you think we need have the lamps ? I suppose 
 tea by fire-light is all right ? Daddy likes it," 
 
 44 Unless it tastes different, like tobacco," I said, 44 I want your 
 tea to taste exactly as it always does," 
 
 44 Discreet, meek, and then affable 1" she cried, getting up, 44 I 
 won't have it. Help me move the table, I must have my tea after 
 all those letters," 
 
 “ Have the C,W,L,-ites been annoying ?" 
 
 4 * Not as C.W,L,-ites, But these combined meetings are per- 
 fectly Satanic." 
 
 “ Are you having a combined meeting ?" 
 
 44 If only," she said, 44 you condescended to mix in decent Society, 
 you'd know we're having a general women's meeting — all sorts — in 
 January; and, by the way, you're down to speak. You're a side- 
 show." 
 
 44 First I've heard of it." 
 
 44 Yes, you haven't been told yet. I've only just put you down," 
 
 44 Thanks immensely," said L 44 I'm not being meek," I hast- 
 ened to add. 
 
 44 You certainly aren't," she said, 44 In fact. I'm afraid you're 
 going to be fidgety. . . ♦ But, besides you, there'll be Miss Acacia 
 Tremayne to represent the Stage Guild " 
 
 44 How did you get Miss Acacia Tremayne ?" 
 
 44 I was waiting in the vestibule of the Piccadilly Palace Hotel." 
 
 44 Dear me," I gasped, 44 was you ?" 
 
 44 Sometimes," she said, reproachfully, 44 you are a very silly 
 padre. I'd gone there to take out poor old great-uncle Dick, who 
 was staying there, and he'd forgotten his umbrella and had to go up 
 again to fetch it." 
 
 Great-uncle Dick was a Rural Dean. I don't quite know what 
 Rural Deans are, but anyhow, he was it; and true to the custom of 
 the lesser dignitaries of the Anglican Establishment, had evidently 
 taken rooms at the Piccadilly Palace as being central and inexpensive 
 and (I suppose) innocuously worldly. On my rare visits there I 
 had always admired the mixture of gaitered ecclesiastics, pink young 
 men, and, well, their cousins, I suppose, 
 
 44 But that still doesn't explain how you met Miss Acacia Tre- 
 mayne," I urged. 
 
 44 She had a little dog," said Barbara, 44 on a chain. And while 
 she was putting a little powder on her nose the little dog ran out to 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 71 
 
 the full length of the chain to bark at a lift girl who was talking in 
 that extraordinary voice they do, and great-uncle Dick came down 
 and tripped over the chain and pulled poor Miss Tremayne over too, 
 of course, and she scratched her nose on somebody's spurs — 
 everyone ran to pick her up — and great-uncle Dick trod on her puff- 
 box* She was too sweet about it, because it was a very pretty one* 
 So I had to lend her some of mine for her poor nose, and " 
 
 “ Barbara ! Do you powder your nose ?" 
 
 She just smiled at me, in a pitying but quite affectionate sort 
 of way* 
 
 44 Well, you see, everything flew out of her little bag, and there was 
 a rosary, so I saw she was a Catholic* So while she was putting her 
 hat straight, I collected her for the Stage Guild, and she said she'd 
 be here in January, playing in Miss Chutney of Putney, and so I've 
 put her down to speak at the combined meeting*" 
 
 ** Well, well, well !" 
 
 44 Don't you approve ?" 
 
 44 Oh, delighted ! All the lads'll roll up like anything* Having a 
 collection ?" 
 
 44 How sordid ! No ! Well, we'll see* What could we have it 
 for ? Think of something*" 
 
 44 What's the meeting for ? I should think that'd give you an 
 idea*" 
 
 44 Well, to get the Catholic Societies to know one another and 
 co-operate* And even to get the Catholics to know one another*" 
 
 44 I suppose they don't ?" 
 
 44 We've about eight hundred Catholics here, and each Catholic 
 knows about three other Catholics*" 
 
 44 Reggie was a guest in a Mess once where the doctor said he had 
 a story, but wouldn't tell it if there were any Catholics present* 
 Reggie held up his hand and seven more out of eighteen held up 
 theirs, and till then none of 'em had known the others were* And 
 once in Italy someone wouldn't believe I was a proper priest because, 
 they said, there were no Catholics in England* * * * However, 
 that's off the point* Why don't they know one another ? I bet 
 they know all about one another*" 
 
 44 Of course, I vas exaggerating* But it is dreadful how cliquey 
 people are* And the worse the less reason there is for it*" 
 
 “ Ah* Where there are big social differences you can't talk 
 about cliques* It's where there are practically no differences that 
 people emphasize them to show they do exist* Between Mrs* A*, 
 
12 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 who can afford three sunflowers and a parrot on her bonnet, 
 and Mrs. B., who can only afford two sunflowers and a pine- 
 apple." 
 
 “ Pineapple /" she said. 44 All the same, hats do make a difference. 
 Anyhow, nobody wears bonnets now, except the Cathedral old 
 women/' 
 
 44 Once," I said, 44 a lady told a friend of mine she didn't know 
 me to bow to, though she moved, to me because she thought she ought ♦ 
 She wouldn't know-me-to-bow-to because I knew her husband's 
 friend, who was better than he was at the flageolet. Also one of the 
 two played poker. I forget which. I'd never heard about 4 moving- 
 to ' before. But I'd noticed a kind of ripple when she passed me. 
 I thought she was nervous." 
 
 44 It's perfectly wonderful," said she, 44 how approved of I am 
 when Aunt Sophia's been here. Everyone knows. Everyone says 
 for weeks afterwards , 4 And how is dear Lady Sophia ? ' or else , 4 How 
 wonderful your dear aunt is, dear Miss Travers !' " 
 
 44 If," said I, 44 poor people feel awkward or silly about the rich, 
 well, it's easy to forgive them. But if rich or 4 upper-class ' people 
 behave wrongly to the poor, I can't forgive them. They ought to 
 be scourged for it, simply. And the middle ones, educated ♦ I 
 can't think of anything more uneducated than to make class distinc- 
 tions. Only people who are afraid of their position collapsing have 
 to bolster it up. Only people who think they won t be taken for 
 4 upper ' have to let other people know they are 4 upper.' And that 
 proves they aren't ." 
 
 44 That's why I like stage folk," she said. 44 Tney're so good- 
 hearted ! They're so tolerant. Too tolerant, I daresay. People 
 say they do all sorts of things they shouldn't. I don't know, but 
 I expect other people do other things they shouldn't. And they're 
 vain and jealous, of course. But at bottom they're kind-hearted. 
 They're human." 
 
 44 And do let's be divine 1 Another thing Reggie and I talked 
 of, if you want to know, is the Fatherhood of God. If He's Father 
 we're sons and daughters, and therefore brothers and sisters. 
 We are l If only people wouldn't think of these things as 
 metaphors ! One can't make 4 Our Father ' mean about as much 
 and as little as 4 Dear Sir '1 God isn't a sort of North Pole with 
 all the lines of longitude knotted on to it, but the Father of a 
 family. . . . Sorry, Barbara; but I do feel so strongly about this ! 
 Even without knowing about grace, and the Body of Christ, and 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 73 
 
 Christ in us — well, anyway, God's in us, and if we remember that, 
 how can we remember anything else l” 
 
 Here at last Elspeth really did bring in the lamps, and I rose and 
 said good-bye* 
 
 She remained there, however, looking into the fire and smiling 
 to herself* Then she said, half afraid lest I should fancy her 
 irreverent : 
 
 u Well, I promise you I'll be a sister to both of them* * * * I" 
 And I departed* 
 
Chapter IX 
 
 A WEEK or two after this Blake invaded my room and sat 
 down on my bed* 
 
 44 Look here/' said he, 44 I particularly want you to come 
 to dinner to-night* There's a reason* There's a parson called 
 Archer staying in the house, and just as I thought I was getting 
 along all right he's upset the whole apple-cart* I don't believe he 
 believes in anything* Quite a decent sort of fellow; but, by Jove, 
 when I said I knew you, and was half thinking of being an R*C*, he 
 fired up and said it wasn't fair of you to be profiting by me having 
 palled up with you to try to persuade me to 'vert* He thinks I'm 
 a perfect ass, intellectually, and no doubt I am, and that you're 
 bound to be able to argue me into anything* And he says if you're 
 anything like intelligent yourself you've got your tongue in your 
 cheek all the while, because you must know modern thought's 
 exploded all your whole position, or something like that* He thinks 
 you don't really believe it all, you see, but that for some reason or 
 another you're bound to try to make me swallow it*" 
 
 44 I don't think I like your parson," said I* 
 
 44 Oh, he doesn't really mean anything nasty* He thinks you're 
 in a false position*" 
 
 44 Well, I needn't stay in it, need I ?" 
 
 44 No; but you know I began by thinking something like 
 that*" 
 
 44 That was different, though I didn't like it* But he ought to 
 know better* But people constantly try to kid themselves that 
 everyone at heart thinks what they do; especially if what the other 
 person says he thinks, annoys them* What's his particular point ? 
 Or is he just vague ?" 
 
 44 Oh, he's got hold of something to prove the Old Testament was 
 all written a*d*, or something*" 
 
 44 Well, we're New Testament folks, anyway; so it wouldn't 
 matter as much as if the New Testament was written b*c* However, 
 it wasn't* Nor the Old Testament a*d*" 
 
 74 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 75 
 
 44 Well, he didn't say that exactly; but he meant lots later than it 
 professed to be; and somehow he made out that all the prophecies 
 were proved to be not prophecies at all, but written after the event, 
 and meaning something quite different/' 
 
 44 Listen; it's quite true that anything about the Old Testament 
 is specially difficult, because it involves a lot of critical questions — 
 he's right there — which makes it desirable one should know Eastern 
 languages and so on before one tackles them in detail. No one 
 would think of beginning to teach a man Christianity nowadays 
 by discussing prophecies, I suppose. But I believe I could put a 
 few large leading notions to you about the history of the Jews which 
 might be useful." 
 
 44 Carry on, then." 
 
 44 Well, I begin by saying that the Jewish people — the Hebrews 
 — stand absolutely alone in history, in a lot of ways. They're 
 unique." 
 
 44 Thank God for that," said he, disconcertingly. 44 Can't stand 
 Jews. One lot of Jews is plenty." 
 
 ** Well, that's as it may be. But now look at this, first. Here's 
 one little family, clan if you like, detaching itself from a huge race 
 and an enormous Empire in Mesopotamia; a large, rich, complicated 
 military monarchy; very civilized, scientific even, artistic; with a 
 strong established religion. And this tiny group wanders off across 
 the continent and gets towards the coast of the Mediterranean, and 
 gets mixed up with a lot of other tribes, and floats off to Egypt, and 
 comes back, and settles down after a fashion, gets carted away to 
 Egypt again, and comes back again, and has generations of fighting, 
 and at last develops a King, and gets an ancient city for a capital, 
 and then gets knocked about worse than ever, splits into two, and 
 gets deported wholesale back to where it came from; and gets 
 trampled down by Greeks of a sort, and then trampled all over again 
 by Rome, and its capital razed again and again — and then suddenly 
 you find Assyria's dead, and Babylon's dead — Persia and Egypt and 
 Greece, and even Rome, as a pagan Empire, and yet — here are 
 the Jews, scattered everywhere, with no real home, German Jews, 
 Polish Jews, English and French and Eastern Jews, but so alive, so 
 special, that you can single 'em out to hate them as you hate no one 
 else, and certainly none of those ancient Empires they came from 
 or lived among. The race is unique ." 
 
 44 Jove !" he said. " I'd never thought about it like that." 
 
 “ Now notice, the only thing in the least original they provided 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 76 
 
 was their religion. They were the very reverse of artists; they 
 weren't scientists; most certainly not philosophers; nor lawyers in 
 the Roman sense; they produced most assuredly an unequalled 
 poetry, but all their literature is religious, inspired by their religion, 
 treating all history from a religious point of view; loving Jerusalem 
 with a passionate love that Athens was never loved with, nor Rome, 
 nor certainly Paris or London, because the Temple was there; and, 
 in short, such that you see that the law of their religion was the law 
 of their life; and it looks as though, as you can't kill them, so neither 
 can you kill their religion. They live by it, and it makes them un- 
 killable. No persecution ever has annihilated it or them." 
 
 44 Well, if you want me to tell the truth, I consider their religion 
 was perfectly beastly. Absolutely bloodthirsty. I thought so even 
 at school, though lots of the Old Test, was good fun, if you'll excuse 
 my saying so. But I know you want me to say what I think. And 
 as for the Psalms and the old prophets, no one ever made head or 
 tail of 'em, Vm sure. I didn't." 
 
 44 Well, some people do, you know. But I acknowledge I don't 
 think the Old Testament's very well taught in schools, especially 
 Protestant schools, where they make so much of it, and not even in 
 Catholic ones. But now here's a third point, and very much to the 
 point. Notice that whatever was bad in their character — and I 
 agree with you they seem to have had, at any rate, a detestable 
 natural character on the whole — was exactly what urged them away 
 from their religion. Whenever they try to mate with other religions, 
 and they were always trying to, it was with peoples and religions 
 which were savage and lustful and always remained so, and in which 
 the lust and the savagery seem to have been part and parcel of their 
 religions." 
 
 I gave him some details of the worships of Moloch and Astarte 
 till he began to be shocked. 
 
 44 But," I went on, 44 there was always some force or other, or 
 persons — especially your prophets — who kept pulling them back 
 to their own religion, and what's more, kept purifying and purifying 
 their idea of their religion; so that the Jews are the only example in 
 history of a race which consistently pursued an upward evolution in 
 religion, though you'll hear the exact opposite maintained often 
 enough. You'll hear that all races, Jews included, started with 
 worship of ghosts or ancestors, or lots of gods, anyhow, and gradually 
 purified their worship and their creed. But they didn't. To begin 
 with, you have to do violence to the evidence to show that the Jews 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 77 
 
 hadn't — ever since Abraham's period, anyhow — a nucleus of real 
 monotheism, which became even more generally and more properly 
 understood and appropriated by the race; the spiritual worship of 
 one only Eternal and Almighty God* And again, you have to do 
 violence to evidence to show that anything of the same sort went on 
 on the same scale anywhere else* Religions elsewhere became more 
 complicated certainly, but not purer* There's more monotheism 
 in early Egypt, for example, than in later* No; gods became more 
 numerous, save for a few philosophers in some places ; and worship 
 mostly became worse*" 
 
 44 Well," he said , 44 no doubt that's true if you say so. It's all off 
 my beat* But I'll take your word* And I did always feel there 
 was something uncanny about the Jews*" 
 
 44 Call it that if you like* Now a fourth point* All pagan litera- 
 ture looks backwards; all Jewish, forward* See what I mean ? 
 Pagan writers picture a golden age in the past from which we've 
 steadily degenerated. Only once in a way, at a crisis, they are 
 hopeful* From the very outset, Jewish literature, which expresses 
 national belief, acknowledges there's been a crash; that a disaster 
 has befallen the race; but, equally from the outset it asserts that 
 there's to be a restoration; a Restorer* Mind you, asserts * Not 
 just hopes, or guesses, or prays* It asserts ♦ Why ? Because it 
 believes God's promised it* The whole of that literature has a 
 unique feature — absolutely unshared* The God it believes in, who 
 can't lie, has promised a Redeemer* That's prophecy en bloc ♦ Now, 
 that idea is permanent and grows ♦ He's to be a descendant of David 
 — and that f s why David, they feel, is so important; not because he's 
 a great conqueror, but because he's the ancestor of the King-to-be; 
 for it's to be a King, with a Kingdom* And a holy King, with 
 a righteous Kingdom, see ? A Kingdom which is to be the 
 triumph of God* And a worldwide triumph* And an eternal 
 triumph." 
 
 44 I see where you're wanting to take me," he said, gravely* 
 
 44 If I were explaining this to you in detail," I said, 44 I should 
 try to show you how a purer and more spiritual idea of the King 
 and Kingdom is always dawning through a less spiritual one* The 
 prophets often see one thing through another* For example, they 
 saw the nation so persecuted, God's worship so dethroned and defiled, 
 that they very likely longed to feel that the coming of the destined 
 Saviour was due for them ; things couldn't be worse; He must surely 
 come now l But they never exactly say so, or never exclusively so* 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 78 
 
 Always something better dawns across the immediate hope of mere 
 national restoration or triumph* On one side, the idea keeps 
 spreading out and universalizing itself; and on the other it gets tied 
 down and made more detailed in many ways* For example, it is 
 certainly stated that the King was to be born, not only of David's 
 stock, but with David's city Bethlehem for birthplace* Catholics 
 have always believed it was said He would be born of a Virgin* 
 Especially it was said He would be rejected by the very people He came 
 to save, and die — be buried, and yet triumph* But I don't want to 
 go into details, as I said* But do notice that all sorts of converging 
 lines define themselves; three especially, one leading you towards 
 the vision of this destined Saviour as suffering — though the Jews 
 so hated the idea that they tried hard to forget those prophecies; 
 one, that this Saviour was both a * son ' of David, and yet is some 
 quite special superhuman relation to God Himself; and third, that 
 His full Triumph meant the consummation of all history, the end 
 of this world, and the beginning of eternity* No one put all these 
 ideas together; but when Christ came, there they all were, floating, 
 drifting, yet somehow, no more developing; but they're knotted 
 together, they become reciprocally intelligible, they get their full 
 meaning, their fulfilment, in Christ, or nowhere *" 
 
 He sat almost horrorstruck* 
 
 44 I wish I'd never come to you," said he, 44 I can't cope with this*" 
 He puffed at his pipe* 44 I didn't quite mean that," he resumed* 
 44 But it's all pretty beastly 1 And I don't mean that ," he went on 
 after a pause, 44 but, oh Lord ! look here, I don't want to be let 
 in for all this — I'm not a religious fellow* I see it's all damned 
 serious, but I don't want to be serious* You make me damned 
 uncomfortable* I tell you I'm not the sort of man to cope 
 with it*" 
 
 44 My dear boy," I said* 44 The first thing Christ'll tell you when 
 you can listen to Him, is that God's your father, and that there's 
 nothing to be afraid of* No one can cope with it* But He can cope 
 with you, I assure you. He won't make you uncomfortable, except 
 in the sense you make a man who's been snake-bitten — yes, by Jove, 
 snake-bitten ! or frost-bitten, anyway — uncomfortable so that he 
 shan't settle down to sleep and sleep himself into death* You're 
 waking up ; and we all hate getting out of bed* I'm afraid I'm mixing 
 my metaphors* But, anyway, show pluck ! And say 4 Thy King- 
 dom Come*' " 
 
 He groaned, and got up* 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 79 
 
 “ Well, anyway, you’ll come to dinner, won’t you ?” 
 
 “ Oh yes,” said I, “ I’ll come.” 
 
 ***** 
 
 I arrived at Blake's home at 7*30, and the clergyman sat at the 
 farther end of the table, and I couldn't talk to him at dinner at all* 
 He wore a sort of black silk tube instead of a waistcoat, in honour 
 of the meal, and he had sandy hair, very smooth* He didn't talk in 
 the ordinary clergyman's voice at all, but very fast and eagerly, in 
 little jerks, shutting his eyes and pushing his neck forward and 
 smiling* I talked about Cubism to the governess on my right, and 
 about the fourth dimension to Miss Blake on my left, and felt I'd 
 earned my dinner* 
 
 After the meal I was pushed up near Mr* Archer* 
 
 44 I've so much wanted to meet you," he said, shutting his eyes 
 tight, and smiling* 44 I so much value meeting those who — er — 
 take your Aspect* I try to see all sides* I go round and round” 
 
 44 Don't you get rather giddy ?" I asked* 
 
 He laughed his curious little sniffing laugh* 
 
 44 Oh sharp ! sharp 1 " he said; and I swore to myself I'd talk sheer 
 ^uet for the rest of the evening* 
 
 44 I know it's not indiscreet of me," he said, 44 if I frankly tell you 
 how interested I am to hear that you're putting the Roman position 
 to our friend here " (Blake scowled at that, I thought), 44 and I was 
 so impressed to think that I could meet a modern thinker who had 
 made the Reconciliation*" 
 
 44 What reconciliation ?" 
 
 He looked at me suspiciously for a moment* 
 
 44 Between the results of modern scientific criticism and the 
 dogmas of orthodoxy, need I say," he answered* 
 
 44 I really don't know that they need reconciling," said I* 
 
 44 But how interesting 1 You mean the conclusions of science 
 and the assertions of the creeds move in different spheres, on different 
 planes ?" 
 
 44 Oh, partly* Sometimes* For example, anthropologists are 
 always talking about the Fall* Well, they shouldn't* The Fall was 
 a supernatural event, and no amount of research into the history of 
 civilization will ever come upon anything which directly concerns 
 it*" 
 
 44 But," said he, rather less gushingly, 44 you mentioned the word 
 4 supernatural*' Now what exactly do you mean by that ? Can we 
 any longer assert its existence in view of modern knowledge ? Or, 
 
8o 
 
 MR, FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 if we do, must we not mean by it something really different from 
 what they used to mean ?" 
 
 44 What did they mean by Supernatural ' ?" 
 
 44 Oh, take miracles for an example/' he said, 44 Now if there's 
 one thing we can't believe in the old sense, and I'm sure you, like 
 all intelligent people, will agree, it's ' miracles,' " 
 
 44 Look," I said, “ I'm sure the servants want to clear away, and 
 they'll be expecting us upstairs pretty soon; and really, to embark on 
 the philosophy of miracles and get it over in five minutes is too much 
 of a good thing. Shall we put it off ?" 
 
 “ Oh, they don't expect us to go upstairs," said Blake, 44 1 told 
 them we were going to have a yarn, and since you have to go back 
 at 10,30 you can just go up and say good-bye. It's all arranged. 
 We'll go to the smoking-room, I really want to hear this," 
 
 So we trooped off to our fate, Reggie and I sulky beyond words, 
 and the clergyman enjoying the prospect of wiping the floor with 
 me, to the greater glory of the Unknowable, 
 
 Old Mr, Blake went upstairs and so, thank goodness, did Blake's 
 younger brother, so there were only the four of us. 
 
 It was all hideously formal, Blake sat down on the padded railing 
 before the fire, where I wanted to sit, too, because the early spring 
 was nearly as cold as midsummer; but I was put in a large chair, 
 one side, and Mr, Archer in a large chair on the other, and Reggie 
 sat, very surly, on a middle-sized chair between us, opposite Blake, 
 The centre-point of this group, however, was a little round table 
 for our coffee cups, and there was some curagoa, so I felt somewhat 
 pacified, 
 
 44 I can't conceive," said Mr, Archer, still with his eyes shut, and 
 putting the tips of his fingers together, 44 why you make so much of 
 miracles. All religions profess to have had them. What would they 
 prove if they'd existed ? Nothing," 
 
 44 Let's circumscribe the topic," I said, 44 to Christian miracles. 
 It's legitimate. In reality, there aren't many rival claimants. One 
 or two worked by 4 Emperor 's-touch ' — -Vespasian, wasn't it ? — a 
 paralytic whom he touched and who walked.* A few by Apollonius 
 of Tyana. And cures said to have taken place in the clinic-shrines 
 of Asklepios. But those are very few, very badly off for evidence* 
 and they occurred in a setting quite different from that of the Gospel 
 miracles. Frankly, I don't believe there's matter there for argu- 
 ment, You can't be sure enough of what happened." 
 
 “ As a matter of fact," said Reggie — it was amusing to see how 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 81 
 
 resolutely he refused to join in the discussion, but addressed all 
 his remarks to me, seeking an authoritative Yes or No, which 
 annoyed Mr. Archer worse than anything else did, all the evening 
 through. 44 As a matter of fact, could there be pagan miracles ?" 
 
 44 I don't see why not," said I. 44 I don't see why God shouldn't 
 work a miracle on behalf of anyone in good faith and with good will. 
 Unless, of course, the miracle was claimed to prove something false, 
 or for an immoral purpose But whether there were any, I don't 
 believe you can ever find out, now. But I see no reason to reject* 
 unexamined, a miracle worked, say, on a modern Protestant, who 
 asked for it in simplicity, and relying on the promises of Christ." 
 
 44 But have you any better evidence," said Mr. Archer, 44 for the 
 Gospel miracles ?" 
 
 44 You have," said I. 44 But since we can't possibly talk about 
 anything and everything, not, for example, about Biblical criticism 
 as well as miracles, let's stick to miracles. And I say that there's 
 as good evidence for the Gospel miracles happening as there is for 
 any other events related in them; and by miracle I mean here, an 
 event quite beyond the combined result of the laws which normally 
 govern human life, and worked in connection with the historical 
 character Jesus Christ, and usually in function of His claim to be the 
 Messiah and God's spokesman, and often directly offered as a proof 
 that in claiming to be that. He was claiming what God, by such a 
 miracle, could guarantee. And you must let me assume what really 
 I think you ought to, nowadays, that the literary evidence is good, 
 and that whatever the nucleus of the Gospels may have been, it 
 included — they all admit it now, don't they ?-— the narrative of certain 
 outstanding miracles." 
 
 44 They were surely the product of the myth-making spirit of the 
 times ! Of a conviction that the man they thought to be Messiah 
 must have worked such marvels." 
 
 44 Well, was there time — first, to invent such myths; then to con- 
 vince the Apostles, who'd been there with Christ, that the miracles 
 had happened; then to impose such a belief on the Christian folk ? 
 After all, they weren't, I imagine, so very different from the rest 
 of the world; yet, when much more "successful' claimants to 
 Messiahship than Our Lord was came along, the world did not 
 surround them with a halo of invented miracles. I don't believe 
 in this craze for inventing miracles. I see no evidence for it. It's 
 only talked about because some reason has to be found for calling 
 the Gospel ones myths. When people did invent miracles, and 
 
 6 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 82 
 
 publish them, for example, in the Apocryphal gospels, they were 
 pretty quickly turned down* But, after all, I don't see why you 
 want to deny that the things happened* If you think the Gospel 
 miracles are too remote to study properly, look at Lourdes* The 
 same things happen there under your nose — except, I confess, 
 resurrections from the dead, or stilling a storm, or multiplying loaves*" 
 
 “ Oh, ah, Lourdes ! But that's easily accounted for* The power 
 of suggestion in functional derangements is limitless* Hysteria can 
 be cured by hypnosis; and the effect of the will of the crowd upon 
 these semi-hysterical paralytics and what not is an ample explanation 
 of what happens at Lourdes*" 
 
 44 But can that be said ?" Reggie asked me* “ I've read quite a 
 lot about Lourdes* I quite understood that no one now was per- 
 mitted to say that hysteria or nerves or all that sort of thing was 
 sufficient to explain Lourdes*" 
 
 44 Not unless you can say that cancer, lupus, Pott's disease, very 
 advanced consumption, broken bones, very deep and suppurating 
 ulcers, and so on, are nervous illnesses, and can be cured instan- 
 taneously by a nervous shock* Here is a minimum, Mr* Archer* 
 If your philosophy allows you to deny the existence of matter or 
 the reality of time, then I think you can extricate yourself from the 
 miraculous character of what happens at Lourdes* Large masses 
 of living tissue appear instantaneously where there was none before. 
 Caverns in lungs are filled, with living tissue, and instantaneously ♦ 
 Now, even if it could happen that such living tissue should come 
 into existence, by way of nutrition and assimilation, it would happen 
 slowly however much you speeded it up* For it to happen instan- 
 taneously, you require the action of laws which medicine knows 
 nothing whatever about and can't cope with; and that's exactly 
 what the supporters of the theory of miracles say do act*" 
 
 “ Well," said Mr. Archer , 44 I've not been to Lourdes, and I can't 
 test what you say* But why shouldn't it all be due to unknown 
 natural laws, and not God at all directly ?" 
 
 44 I'll allow this* If it's not due to God, it's got to be due not only 
 to natural laws which you don't know, but to natural laws which 
 contradict several you do, as I've said. Now why are you driven to 
 assuming that must be how the Lourdes phenomena are worked ? 
 Because you start with a determination that there shall be no super- 
 natural events, and so, if an inexplicable event occurs, you say, 
 without any evidence, 4 1 now see Nature can not only do more 
 than I thought it could, but what I was sure it couldn't* Sooner 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 83 
 
 than admit divine agency, Fll scrap all I've got of scientific certainty 
 hitherto/ " 
 
 44 Look here/' he said, “ let's be honest* I'll tell you exactly 
 why I can't admit miracles, quite independently of evidence* To 
 my mind it's impossible, and it's immoral for God to interfere with 
 natural laws* If He works a miracle, interferes with nature, for the 
 sake of an individual, well, it's gross favouritism, and it's confessing 
 He'd made the world badly in the first instance; and again, if even 
 one miracle has been worked, still more, if God is liable to work 
 miracles, so to say, well, everything's thrown into uncertainty, and 
 there's an end of science*" 
 
 “ And let it rip," said Reggie, to the ceiling this time* 
 
 “ We have not all the same amount of intellectual detachment as 
 you seem to have, Mr* Orwylstree," said Mr* Archer, rather acidly* 
 44 Some of us value science*" 
 
 Reggie puffed smoke rings, and said nothing* 
 
 44 About all these laws of nature," said I* 0 What's a law of 
 nature ? It means that you watch natural objects and observe that 
 they always act in the same way, in the same circumstances* Push 
 a stone over the edge of the window-sill and if there's nothing to stop 
 it, it'll always fall* Leave it lying on the ground, let nothing touch 
 it, there it'll stay* Well, an architect comes along; he sees the stone> 
 he takes it, and, according to a quite different kind of law, that by 
 which his mind works, he knocks it into a shape, and what is more, 
 into the proper shape for a particular part, say, of a Cathedral* The 
 stone doesn't instantly start yelling out: 4 You're interfering with 
 my laws* Let me alone* Don't bully me !' The architect's not 
 interfering with its laws, but bringing his mind's laws to work in 
 with the stone's laws; and a perfectly different result takes place to 
 what would have been had the stone and the architect never met* 
 And observe, the result succeeds only if both obey their laws perfectly 
 — if the architect's mind gives way, the Cathedral won't stand up; 
 if the stone was soft, and good for carving into a cornice, and 
 suddenly acted 4 illegally,' and made itself hard, it would be a bad 
 carving; and if it really were hard, and was meant to be used as a 
 foundation, and acted softly, it would crumble, and the building 
 fall, and all would be spoilt* So here you get a certain result by one 
 set of laws being brought to work in with another set of laws; the 
 result is utterly beyond what stone-laws could bring about by them- 
 selves; but they've not been interfered with; and if you know both 
 sets of laws you can make a perfectly good scientific statement of 
 
84 MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 what's happened* So if God, whom we believe to exist and to act 
 freely, chooses to bring a higher set of laws to work in with our set, a 
 result else impossible occurs, but nothing unscientific or arbitrary* 
 And as for what Mr* Orwylstree said about science, well, as I said, 
 there are different sorts of laws; for instance, moral laws; and I'd 
 certainly far rather ascertain a moral law than the law, say, which 
 governs telephones* I prize both sorts, but I'd willingly sacrifice 
 physical science to moral knowledge*" 
 
 44 Would you really ?" he asked* 44 Can one be so sure at all that 
 one ever possesses moral certainty ?" 
 
 44 The less you are sure," I said, I fear rather primly, “ the less 
 you must permit yourself to say what God ought or oughtn f t to do, 
 whether by way of a miracle or not* I've even known some gentle- 
 men who said they discerned what miracles in the Gospels or in 
 history to accept and which to reject, by their moral sense* They 
 corrected the Gospels by their conscience* It never occurred to 
 them to educate their conscience by the Gospels* Until you know 
 all the circumstances, and that's the full contents of the soul for 
 whose sake the miracle is worked, and all its future, how can you 
 possibly venture to say whether God ought or oughtn't to lift its 
 system of laws into active conjunction with higher systems, with 
 Himself in the long run ? If there's anyone arbitrary in this depart- 
 ment, it's the man who says God can't , and God shan't ♦ A little 
 humility !" 
 
 He sighed, and I felt kindlier towards him* 
 
 44 Don't you make the whole thing harder for yourself," I said, 
 “ by trying to take one 4 miracle ' at a time and trying to explain 
 it away, and then the next, and so on ? Or, at best, by thinking of 
 them simply as odd conjuring tricks done to make you jump ? 
 Oughtn't one to keep one's eye on Our Lord's miracles, anyhow, 
 as a group, and, in fact, as a series, and as done in connection with a 
 certain teaching and also a certain character ? It is true they can 
 be looked at as signs — as popular proofs, * omnium intelligent^ 
 accommodata,' as the Vatican Council said, 4 suited to the ordinary 
 mind*' But, now look a little further* Suppose you believe — 
 as surely you do believe — in God as what Our Lord told us to 
 think of Him — as a Father, a Heart absolutely yearning with love 
 for His human creatures, yearning to communicate Himself to them, 
 and happy of any excuse, so to say, for revealing Himself to them, 
 isn't it likely that on every occasion we let Him, He'll manifest 
 His power and love, and bring more order into the world, a richer 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 85 
 
 order, and I daresay more quickly ? And if you believe, as I can't 
 help supposing you do, that He'd made a tremendous invasion into 
 our world in the person of Jesus Christ, if He'd made that sort of 
 breach in the closed system we so wantonly keep building up out of 
 our tiny knowledge of one sub-department of nature and its laws, 
 isn't it likely that His love and power would come penetrating into 
 our world through all the chinks and crannies, so to say, as well as 
 through the great central channel of the Person of Christ ? It's 
 possible, as I said, to work up to Christ's personality through the 
 miracles, but when you've got a knowledge of Christ, can't you 
 work back from that to the miracles ? You ought to see all these 
 things in function of one another, prophecies, miracles, Christ* If 
 there had been a quantity of prophecies about someone who turned 
 out to be no one in particular, neither very good nor very influential, 
 like you and me, or even influential in a worldly way merely, as 
 Julius Caesar, or Shakespeare, then one would be right to be biassed 
 against the prophecies, and see if they weren't easily explained by 
 flukes, or mistakes, or in some other way* And if someone who 
 was immoral, or just neutral, with nothing special about him, started 
 to work miracles — Napoleon, or Wellington, or again, you or I — well, 
 you'd be right in hesitating to believe in those miracles and strug- 
 gling to get rid of them* But when you know what you do of God, 
 and that He wants to win souls to union with Him, and love for 
 Him; when you see how, anyhow, He lived in, and was revealed in, 
 Jesus Christ, then it's not wonderful that He should have kept 
 making people want Our Lord; should have promised Our Lord; 
 should have kept saying Our Lord was coming; and when He did 
 come, should constantly and most lovingly and most beautifully have 
 acted through Him, not only as little as possible and in one way only, 
 but as much as possible and in all the ways*" 
 
 44 I didn't know you would still speak like that," said he* “ It's 
 quite different from my habitual line of thought* Can one really," 
 he asked, not smiling now , 44 talk of the love of God and mean any- 
 thing by it ? Isn't it our human way merely of reflecting our own 
 feelings and wishes on to God ? Haven't we built Him up in our 
 own image ? For what is God ? How can we state Him ? And 
 Christ — seriously, can one be expected to feel love for anyone who 
 died 2,000 years ago ? He was a beautiful character, one may be 
 sure, and one can use much of what He bequeathed to us, as example; 
 but even He was limited, subject to the errors of His own time, and 
 I daresay faults* But enter into personal relations with Him ? 
 
86 
 
 MR, FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 Let us be glad if what we feel may have been His spirit is alive in 
 our own hearts, and foster that as best we may,” 
 
 “ I say/' said Blake, who hadn't spoken yet, “ would it be 
 frightful impertinence on my part if I asked how you can carry on 
 as a — in your profession — if you think that sort of thing ? At least 
 unless I'm mistaking you altogether," 
 
 44 I do very little active work, Mr, Blake," said the clergyman, 
 suddenly opening his eyes quite wide, 44 I am — well, a student," 
 
 44 But, look here, you took the services last Sunday, And I know 
 you preached, because the guv'nor told me — I'm afraid I've given 
 myself away rather badly; as a matter of fact, I was playing golf; 
 but then, well, I don't profess to — oh well, the point is, how d'you 
 manage it ? For instance, when you say the Creed ?" 
 
 Mr, Archer shut his eyes again, 
 
 44 It would be tedious if I took each article of the Creed and told 
 you how I can truthfully recite it. The Resurrection ! Well, is 
 Christ dead ? Is not His Spirit, as I said, still living ? He is risen 
 then, and He works among us. And the despised Galilean is wor- 
 shipped by many millions. He has triumphed, more than is given 
 to most men. Is not that an Ascension ? A sharing God's throne ? 
 The Trinity ? Well, I own I have never been much interested in 
 the numerical aspect of the Trinity, But need I go on ? I can 
 preach the eternal truths of science and of morality. And as a 
 clergyman, I can lead many who are tempted to throw all religion 
 overboard, owing to modern difficulties, to the spiritual equivalent 
 for the old dogmas, I can re-state the ancient faith. Indeed, I 
 feel that," said he, with his quick little sniff and smile, 44 to be 
 my special job," 
 
 44 And a damned rotten job it is," said Reggie, flaring suddenly, 
 “ if you'll forgive me saying so, I'm a younger man, I know, and 
 not a scholar, but at least I've got a knowledge of what the average 
 fellow feels, and I tell you, with all due respect, what you say won't 
 wash. If I came to you and said, 4 Was Christ born of a virgin ?' 
 you ought to say, 4 No, He wasn't,' 4 Did He rise from the dead ?' 
 4 No, He didn't,' 4 Does He know or care anything about me now ? 
 And can He help me ?' 4 No, He doesn't, and He can't,' Then 
 we'd know where we were. Then you can start out clear, putting 
 your collar on the ordinary way round and presenting yourself as a 
 don or a doctor or what you like, but not as a minister of the Church 
 of England, Go and try your stunt on the ordinary man. Try it 
 in the army. See what happens. They did try it, lots of 'em. 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 87 
 
 Some of 'em washed it all down to what you do; some of 'em tried 
 to put it on a sort of John Bull or Billy Sunday level — called Our 
 Lord 4 a good sort/ a 4 gallant gentleman/ and what not; and I tell 
 you it disgusted them* Sharp eyes they've got* First-rate sense* 
 See through it every time* The Catholic priest comes round; and 
 he says, 4 Lads, you've committed a lot of mortal sins, very likely, 
 and if you're not sorry, you'll go to hell for it and lose God for ever* 
 But you know what to do* You know how to make your act of 
 contrition, and how to go to confession, and I'll give you absolution 
 in God's name and then you're clean and free* And then I'll give you 
 Our Lord's Body and Blood in Holy Communion, and I'll offer the 
 adorable sacrifice of the Mass for you, and you'll go off and try to 
 do better, and if you're killed you'll go to Purgatory, and the rest 
 of us'll pray for your soul*' Knew where they were, those priests 
 did* Gave 'em something to bite upon* And the Protestant 
 officers or N*C*0*'s, who might be taking the parade, knew it, too* 
 Modernism ? Wash-out* Keep it for Cathedral towns and 
 universities* Don't give it to us*" 
 
 44 My dear Mr* Orwylstree," began Mr* Archer, rather bewildered, 
 * 4 I wouldn't think of giving it to you; I'm only too envious of your 
 
 serene and childlike faith — I " 
 
 44 Oh /or," said Reggie, getting up* 44 Look here, I apologize, sir* 
 You have your way of looking at things, and it's not for a layman 
 like me to criticize* Blake, I'm excessively sorry for making a scene. 
 Shan't occur again* I'll get out my old bike if you don't mind, and 
 hop it* Bye-bye, Father." 
 
 And he disappeared, quite forgetting the family upstairs* 
 
 Blake was driving me back in the side-car, and as the hedges tore 
 past us, he said — feeling, I take it, more at his ease while doing some- 
 thing, and in the dark: 
 
 44 Look here, padre, it impresses a chap like me more than a little 
 when he sees a man like Orwylstree, who's not a pious sort of weak- 
 ling — well, when he sees him care like that for his religion* Makes 
 you see someone feels there's something in it* Better than yards of 
 arguing* I'm glad I asked him* The parson had begun to make 
 me feel rotten* Orwylstree put it right again*" 
 
 44 You may realize, some day," I said, 44 that he's doing more than 
 you guess, just now, for the sake of his religion*" 
 
 44 Is he, indeed?" said Blake; then he continued: 44 And I tell 
 you this* I'm saying my prayers regularly* Not much, you 
 know, just the Our Father and — well, damn it, why not say ? — 
 
88 
 
 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 some prayers for my people, and to be good, and a jolly old 
 hymn or two, something which I'd learnt as a kid. And I've 
 started reading odd bits of the Gospels, just as I would any other 
 book, you know, just to see what happened. And what — what 
 Christ was like . Quite a new idea to me." 
 
 “ And what," I said, 44 d'you feel He was like ?" 
 
 The motor bicycle swerved slightly. 
 
 44 I'm not quite able to talk about it yet, padre. Sometimes it 
 makes me feel rotten, and sometimes — well, sometimes it doesn't." 
 
 But we had come to Wilchurch, and drove noisily through the old 
 East Gate, over which the Angel knelt, uttering his eternal Ave to 
 our Lady, and announcing to the weary millions of humanity God's 
 Incarnation. 
 
Chapter X 
 
 HE spring was still new when I received a letter from Miss 
 
 Silver* She had lost her way near Paddington, looking for 
 
 a Barmaids' Rest-house she had been told to visit in that 
 neighbourhood, and, turning down a side-street, to her amazement, 
 she saw the tawny forelock of the Corporal flickering over the 
 counter of a small fried-fish shop; and when, above the door, she 
 read the simple legend Frank's, she felt so sure that it was he 
 that the audacious woman entered, introduced herself as a friend 
 of mine, and enquired the way* She and the Corporal had, evi- 
 dently, a most pleasant conversation, and she explained to me 
 exactly where the shop was; so when, rather later on, I missed my 
 train at Paddington and couldn't get home, anyway, till late, I went 
 off to try to track him down* 
 
 The shop was tucked away behind the station, as she'd told me, in 
 the sort of district where you didn't expect slums, but where things 
 are pretty bad, and the worse for their dingy wash of respectability* 
 His little street, however, was less respectable than most, and you 
 felt less morally suffocated, whatever you might think about the 
 smells* I visited him rather before what I thought would be closing- 
 time, and decided to take the last train home* 
 
 It was a tiny place; the shop itself, and a cupboard of a room 
 behind it* However, I saw a fire flickering in there, and it might 
 have the elements of cosiness* One gas-jet flared in the shop, and 
 an ingenious system of tin reflectors, which he'd obviously invented, 
 gathered the light and cast it down on the sloping marble slab in the 
 window* The fish looked rather blood-curdling; but the sight of 
 the Corporal under the gas encouraged me, though I couldn't resist 
 pausing a minute to read the head-lines of his price list, placarded 
 by the door* 
 
 AS SERVED TO 
 
 H*R*H* The Prince of Wales 
 in his Dug-out at G*H*Q* Hell, near Ypres 
 by Corporal Frank Newnes* 
 
 (Late of the 107th Middlesex Regiment.) 
 
 F 
 
 'RANK'S 
 
 RIED 
 
 ISH 
 
go 
 
 MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 Aghast at his inventiveness I entered* And I found an elderly 
 lady saying earnestly to the Corporal : 
 
 44 And as I says to Mrs* 'Olmes: 4 If you can't be as good as you 
 should, be as good as you can/ and 4 Mrs* Barrett/ she says to me, 
 4 if we all 'ad the same noble sentiments as you, Mrs* Barrett/ she 
 says, 4 different indeed would be the world, Mrs* Barrett,' she says*" 
 Here Mrs* Barrett fixed me with a hazy eye* 
 
 But the all-seeing Corporal had long ago observed me* He 
 leaned across his counter and shook hands violently* 
 
 But Mrs* Barrett interposed* 
 
 44 Though not wishful to interrupt, Mr* Newnes," she said, 44 nor 
 would I so far demean meself nor afflict me own affairs upon the 
 reverend gentleman, declare I will, and none shall stop me, that if 
 that there Welfare Visitor were a Visitor , give me burglars* Flounce 
 into me room she did, as I were sayin', though flounce is not the 
 word, such is the petticoats they wears nowadays, nor I wouldn't 
 condescend meself, nor do I believe they f as none, but when I says 
 petticoats I mean them skimpy skirts as wouldn't make a coverin' 
 for a bird-cage tho' not to you would I be sayin' it, Mr* Newnes, 
 bein' but a bachelor, nor yet the reverend gentleman* But in she 
 come an' 'as a envelope in 'er 'and wot's marked Urgent by the 
 Council, and 4 Mrs* Barrett,' says she, 4 your Anna Jane 'as got to 
 'ave her teeth see to this instant an' I'm come to fetch 'er*' An' 
 4 Ma'am,' says 1, 4 teeth it may be or teeth it may not be, but see that 
 pore child suffer I will not, nor yet vaccinated, which if it be not 
 flyin' in the face of Almighty Providence I asks you but to tell me 1 
 But see that there innercent child settin' in the dentist's chair an' 
 bein' tortured I could not, nor I will not*' An' I'll make bold to 
 ask the reverend gentleman 'ere, bein' a gentleman as I sees well, 
 'avin' been brought up so meself an' most select, ask you I does. 
 Mister, if I was wrong*" 
 
 44 Perhaps, Mrs* Barrett," said I, timidly, 44 if the Council marked 
 it 4 urgent ' it meant that your little Anna Jane's teeth were really 
 very bad* If she didn't have them seen to she might get poisoned 
 all through, you know, and * * ♦ and * * ♦ her little face come out 
 all over spots," said I, with a really fine flight of imagination* 
 
 44 And if them was not my very words to Mrs* 'Olmes," said she, 
 surprisingly* 44 4 Mrs* 'Olmes,' I says, 4 look at your own little 
 'Epzibah,' says I, 'er bein' Particular Bible Christian an' namin' 
 her family accordin', 4 that's worse spotted nor a Christmas slice, 
 an' never been near the cruel dentist, such is your tender 'eart*' " 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 91 
 
 44 Quite so," said I* “ Perhaps if she'd had a couple of bad teeth 
 out, she might have been saved all those spots* That's what I say*" 
 
 44 That's what you says, is it ?" exclaimed this astonishing woman, 
 turning on me with much ferocity* 44 And '00 may you be, Mister 
 black-coat, which many a decent widder 'as more right to it than 
 you, when all's said ! Sidin' with them Welfare 'ussies invadin' of 
 the 'ome as the 'tecs themselves would think twice on afore they 
 ventured* Spots, is it ? Spots to you, as has never 'ad a mother's 
 'eart, which even my fourth has it, though not a day more nor 
 thirteen, an' when I says to 'er , 4 Amelia,' says I, * if you 'as the face 
 'an the 'eart to take yer little sister to the dentist, take 'er,' says I, 
 4 an' never look me in the eyes again* For see 'er suffer I will not f 
 an' with that she ups an' she screams an' 4 Never arsk me, Ma, 
 cries she , 4 never you arsk me, for see it I could not nor could I ever 
 bear it*' Purple she was afore she'd done, an' the neighbours as 
 was standin' round the door, they 'ad to smack 'er cruel between the 
 shoulder-blades afore she give over, an' Welfare Winnie she pick 
 up 'er skirts an' she run for it, an' as for 'er 'at it would have dis- 
 graced the 'alls," said Mrs* Barrett, dabbing her eyes* 
 
 44 Look 'ere, Far-ther," said Frank, at last getting an edgeways 
 word in , 44 you 'op it fer a hour or so an' then we'll 'ave closed down, 
 an' peace an' quiet will reign once more in me little 'ome* You 
 come back, Far-ther, an' you an' me'll do our bit of yappin' by our 
 lonesome* You 'op it*" 
 
 A prolonged wail from Mrs* Barrett followed me out into the 
 dark, and I left the unfortunate Frank to make the best of her 
 hysterics* I felt sure he was competent* When I returned the 
 little window light was out, and the street was silent* But through 
 the glass I could see into the inner room, of which the door stood 
 open; and there was Frank, sitting and staring into the fire* Even 
 when I entered the shop he didn't hear me* In the firelight the 
 shadows of his stooping face were very defined* They started up 
 by his eyes and followed the hollows of his cheeks and passed into 
 the strong lines scarred downwards by his mouth* He was always 
 thin, but he looked thinner, like that, and the lines very marked 
 indeed* His face was curiously grave; not despondent, not anxious, 
 but somehow very serious* I paused a minute, spellbound by the 
 sense of his personality, his lonely selfhood, as he sat with his elbows 
 on his knees, hands clasped, and stared into the fire* The world 
 fell away around him; nothing mattered, for a moment, that was not 
 he* I was so frightened, somehow, that honestly I almost retreated; 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 92 
 
 I couldn't break through the invisible things that fenced him; it 
 became impossible to feel that anything less than God and His 
 angels, and sin, and hell, and heaven were concentrated there. Yet 
 he never moved, but sat, very grave, Watching the red glow. 
 
 In a moment he felt my presence, and sprang up, grinning. I 
 went quickly in. 
 
 44 Don't light the gas, Frank," I said. 44 Let's sit like this." 
 
 A kettle already was whispering on the fire ; and he produced, to 
 my surprise, the whisky promised long ago, though not, thank 
 goodness, in the threatened quantities. 
 
 44 Wot price Mother Barrett ?" he enquired. “ Fair ole bilious 
 attack, ain't she ? An' yet again she ain't. Got a good 'eart, she 
 "as, though selfish, when all's said. But without knowin' it." 
 
 44 I expect you get a number of customers like that, don't 
 you ?" 
 
 “ Ah," said he. 44 'Tain't the right locality. Give me the East, 
 the genuine East. Not but what the South ain't bad, 'specially near 
 the river. Dirtier ? Well, that's as it may be. Reckon you won't 
 find much dirt round my little dug-out. Fair old 'ousemaid, I'm 
 becomin'. That's where I'm different nor what I were. But, 
 Far-ther, you 'xamine them respeckable residences round about with 
 their lil' white curtains an' lil' bookays o' sham flowers, an' I reckon 
 you'll find 'em fair greasy with the dirt as is in 'em. Curtains ? I 
 'as curtains, as you can see fer yerself; but nothin' doin' in the 
 curtain line if I couldn't afford to 'ave 'em washed. An' flowers ? 
 Give me a honest marigold, yes, or a carrot-top, if I carn't 'ave 
 roses. But calico ? Not Frank Newnes, Esquire." 
 
 I got up and wandered round the room. It was almost bare, but 
 certainly, no fal-lals. I had never expected this. 
 
 I picked up a paper-covered book from a low cupboard, but he 
 jumped up and took it away from me. 
 
 44 Not for you," said he, curtly, and threw it into a corner. 
 
 44 Not but what," he continued, 44 Mrs. Barrett makes it homey 
 for me, on and off, by 'er conversation. Whitechapel, she come 
 from, and in 'er 'eart don't take kindly to the West. Bills an' Jacks 
 and 'Erbs is 'er proper list; not these 'ere Claudies an' Cyrils an' 
 Basils wot's crawlin' all around wiv collars an' cuffs this beat. If 
 there was any Claude 'er way, it were her as clawed 'im," said he, and 
 since his peculiar humour didn't mostly run to puns, I perceived 
 he was forcing himself a little, and I tried to divert him into 
 argument. 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 93 
 
 “ I expect all the curtains and Cuthberts are symbols, if you see 
 what I mean, of their wanting something better l Something 
 prettier — something more dignified than what they've got*” 
 
 “ You listen to me,” said he* 44 That's all right* 'Ope; that's 
 good* Try; that's good, too* But not as they does* Take White- 
 chapel* There's lots of 'ope an' tryin' goin' on there* Fine it is 
 to watch it* Courage ? Believe me * 'Opin' they'll get through, 
 spite of all* Tryin' to keep chin above the black water,” said he, 
 looking constantly at me away from the fire, but his head turning 
 back and back to the red coals where he saw his vision* 44 Try they 
 do an' 'ope they do, an' strewth if it ain't enough ter make a man 
 believe in Gawd to see 'em* But they don't pretend* Or less* Far 
 less* They knows wot they is, an' they is it; sweatin', strugglin', 
 'opin', tryin'; bein' downed an' up again; and 'elpin' an' laughin' an' 
 no airs ; but brothers, they is, an' sisters, an' better nor brothers an' 
 sisters*” 
 
 44 It's good to hear you say so; but why can't I say the same for 
 the Westerns ? They're trying* They've succeeded a bit; but 
 they're trying for better still* You can never catch up with your 
 hope, Frank* ♦ ♦ ♦” 
 
 “True for you,” said he* 44 For once I agrees with you* * ♦ *” 
 His wistful eyes, so different from the flashing squirrel's eyes of old 
 days, still watched the splendid glow* “ You never can catch up* 
 * * ♦ But this is what's the matter with them. They ain't tryin' 
 because they want to be summat, if you takes me, but because they 
 want to be wot the other ain't* 'Tain't love o' the better, s'much as 
 despisin' the worse* They says : 4 Thank Gawd we ain't East End 1 
 Thank Gawd we's Us !' An' they only try to up themselves a bit in 
 order to be one ahead of the next man as is down. 'Ate, it is; not 
 real 'ope* Pride, it is, an' a beastly stiflin' brand of it, not self- 
 respect* Self-respects themselves, do the Whitechapelers, an' don't 
 you doubt it* Tries to do the little bit they can; an' pals, if they 
 succeeds, with them as didn't succeed* Do hanythink for 'em 4 
 But West ? Huh ! 4 Keep meself to meself,' that's their motter. 
 Keep me skirts off that nasty Mrs* Brown* Keep me bright Cuth- 
 bert orf Dirty Dick — an' I'll tell you,” said he, 44 wot I saw no 
 further off nor yesterday* There's a lady wot visits down 'ere, an' 
 a good 'un she is, every time; but she limps, she does, like me, so 
 I sympathizes* Limps. Very well* If 'arf a dozen of them damned 
 Cuthberts didn't take an' limp down the street after 'er, an' talk in 
 a eddicated voice to each other takin' of 'er off, if you follow me* 
 
94 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 Now never would you have seen that in Whitechapel,” said he. 
 44 Whitechapel way, they knows wot's wot. An' if a angel do come 
 down their street, well, they recognizes it.” 
 
 44 Having a dose of the angelic in their own souls,” said I. 44 What 
 did you do when you saw that ?” 
 
 44 Wot I did ? 'Ave a little war on me own ! that's wot I done. 
 Knock their blarsted 'eads together, I did, an' more nor once. And 
 wot I said ? Never you ask me, Far-ther; which it would 'ave 
 made a 'erring blush.” 
 
 44 That would have looked very odd,” I acknowledged. 44 Frank, 
 what a Christian you are, after all.” 
 
 44 Huh 1” cried he, sitting up, and on the point of a violent dis- 
 claimer. Then he sank together again into his chair and reached 
 out his left hand, taking mine quite in the old way. 
 
 He continued quickly, still not looking at me. 
 
 44 No, I ain't that. Never so far in the opposite direction. 
 Reckon,” said he, 44 you ain't goin' to catch up with yer 'ope neither.” 
 Once more gravity descended on to his features, as he watched the 
 glow. I said nothing, and after a while he resumed. 
 
 44 I bin into that old church of yours again, more'n once. I 
 reckon it was offerin' me what you offers, and stronger than you do* 
 I've 'ad to own up to this : your religion's a real thing, an' I've known 
 it all along, only I'd kid meself it were 'umbug. It ain't 'umbug. 
 Real it is, an' it were a real offer that there church was makin' me. 
 Talked, that church did. Or, not talked, but somethin' queerer. 
 Made me a genuine offer, anyways. An' it come thus. 'Twas it, 
 or 'twas this shop. An' this I chose. See the winders of this old 
 shop flickerin' through that there church's walls. . . .” 
 
 He paused again. 
 
 On the dark panes the firelight put faint reflections, and through 
 them I could just see the arcading opposite. 
 
 44 For my part, Frank,” I said, 44 I can feel the Cathedral looking 
 through the walls even of your shop.” 
 
 He sprang up nervously, and pulled a red curtain. Then he 
 returned to his old position, but didn't take my hand. He clasped 
 his own together so hard that the knuckles glistened. 
 
 44 It isn't the Cathedral or the shop,” I said. 44 The two can go 
 together.” 
 
 44 Not for me,” he said, and was silent again. 
 
 44 Have I ever seen such a fight,” I began once more, 44 as between 
 God and you ! I don't think you can conquer.” 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 95 
 
 44 Ah* Let me alone*” 
 
 44 How can I ? And, anyway, it isn't I*” 
 
 44 When wasn't it you ? It was a year of you in 'ospital, an' you 
 ever since*” 
 
 44 I think that hospital was the happiest time of my life* And the 
 holiest*” 
 
 44 That so ?” 
 
 44 And of yours, kid.” 
 
 44 Well, I won't say no. But you can't call me kid no more. I'm 
 a 'undred year older since then.” 
 
 44 In hospital men often become very childlike* Just sub- 
 mit* No possibility of choosing, as far as outside things go, 
 anyway.” 
 
 44 Ah ! I've been choosing since then, sure enough. Fightin' 
 even, for what I wanted.” 
 
 44 But it wasn't only happy because you couldn't choose about 
 outside things. You could do a good deal inside your head* Pain 
 shrivels up such a lot of secondary things* You get — or you may 
 get — just a few simple big things left, clear of cobwebs and illusions, 
 God, your soul, sin; you are apt to judge yourself, judge right, and 
 show yourself to God. And then, to hope. ♦ ♦ *” 
 
 44 Men's minds is weak things,” said he. 44 Those is ideas as 
 flickers through, an' not so strong as me shop-window through the 
 church* For they flickers out in the daylight, and with a bit of 
 health. And with no one to 'elp you fix 'em.” 
 
 44 Didn't you and I fix them at all i” 
 
 44 You worried me some,” he said. 44 But I wouldn't let on*” 
 
 44 Have they really disappeared ?” 
 
 44 Not when me leg 'urts.” 
 
 44 Does it much ?” 
 
 44 Times it does. But 'ope ? I've got me 'ope ! I've got 
 me shop. Wot more do I want ? Caught 'im up, old 'ope, I 
 'ave !” 
 
 44 Is he what you'd expected ?” 
 
 44 No — 'e ain't* Nothin's that, as I told you. But 'e's good 
 enough. Now you 'earken. Us 'ere to-night* Ain't that good 
 enough ?” 
 
 I smiled a little ruefully, but he didn't notice. 
 
 44 Well, then,” he went on. 44 And is it same as we expected ? 
 Sure not. Remember me tellin' you 'ow we was to romp round 
 'Olloway, me king of the district, an' knockin' 'em all with the sight 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 96 
 
 of you ? Well, an' 'ow 'ave we met ? Inside of a Lockhart's. In- 
 side of a church. An' settin' 'ere together in the dark, an' Frank 
 Newnes a shop-keeper. Shop-boy rather. Doin' it all 'imself and 
 as regular as a station clock. And 'avin' chosen it. Gawd A'mighty ! 
 Choosin' it ! Old afore my time, by years an' years. Respeckable ! 
 Gawblimey !" 
 
 44 What about the little Irish girl we'd talked of ?" 
 
 44 Aw. Marryin'. N-a-o-w. 'Twouldn't be fair. It's a 
 gamble, this 'ere shop is, when all's said; and I couldn't bring a 
 wife in." 
 
 44 But aren't you lonely ? When your leg hurts. . . . ?" 
 
 44 Lonely I always was, in a manner o' speakin'," he said. 
 44 Different. Even in me bright-an'-merry days. Even when girls 
 was 'undred strong around me. Never a one would I 'ave spliced 
 meself to, nor could 'ave. Couldn't. Nor them neither; scared 
 o' me, some'ow, even when most lovin'. Quick change, therefore ; 
 new one each week, an' never kept waitin'." 
 
 44 Dear old boy. I tell you, there's only one thing for you and 
 never has been but one. The Infinite; and the Eternal. And don't 
 say you don't understand. You very well do." 
 
 44 Only too well I know what you mean," he said, scowling. 
 44 Now you 'earken. Satisfied I may not be; 'ow should I be ? 
 'Oo's satisfied ? But that ? N-a-o-w ! An' don't you go thinkin' 
 that I'm goin' to the dogs, 'cos I won't 'ave that. I 'as me will, and 
 by me will I've got this shop, and by me will I'm livin' on it, an' 
 livin' straight. Leastways, straight enough. Girls ? Huh ! don't 
 
 worry me, girls don't. I'm through with them. Not but what 
 
 But anyways, through with them I am, to show you . Show you I 
 will that I've no need of your infinite nor yet of your eternal, as you 
 likes to put it. Your old Church, it 'ad somethin' to say on that 
 subject, and it made me the offer. I'd be lyin' if I said it didn't. But 
 I said N-a-o-w” 
 
 44 What did you mean when you said 4 straight enough ' ?" 
 
 44 Wot I've just told you." 
 
 44 Well, aren't you in other ways ?" 
 
 44 Well — p'raps you'd say not about one or two of the wheezes 
 as I brought off in connection with this 'ere shop. Raisin' money 
 in one or two little ways as I'd not go into the details of. Rumblin' 
 this 'ere furniture, and one thing an' another. Not crook, exactly, 
 it wasn't, none of it. But a bit — well, it'll all be paid back, never 
 you fear." 
 
MR, FRANCIS NEWNES 97 
 
 44 Suppose — suppose the shop went bust ? Sorry for even sug- 
 gesting it, but supposing it did ?" 
 
 44 Then it's good-bye Mr, Francis Newnes," said he, looking side- 
 ways at me , 44 for time bein' at all events," 
 
 44 1 think it'll have to be good-bye, anyhow," I said, laughing, and 
 standing up, “ Mustn't risk my train," 
 
 44 Shall I come with you to Paddington ?" he asked, without 
 moving, 
 
 44 Don't you worry. It's no distance. You go to bed," 
 
 I was standing behind him, and had my hands on his shoulders. 
 He put up his own hands and took mine, 
 
 44 I'm thinkin' of our last day on the river," he said, 44 Why 
 couldn't we 'ave stopped there, ever and ever ?" 
 
 44 Perhaps some day you'll come back, I wrote to you that old 
 Sergeant's there. And Jock's grave's there, and so's he, in a sense. 
 Only poor old Hal's the other side of the world ! But he's alive. 
 He's doing good work, , ♦ ," 
 
 “ Can't go back," said he, with terrible truth, 44 Never is no 
 goin' back, 'Twouldn't be that me. Don't you go calling me 
 4 Corporal ' never no more. Nor yet < kid,' Better keep to Frank* 
 I reckon I'm Frank still, though times I don't know me own self 
 proper. But the Corp you used to come an' see in bed ? No, 
 That ain't me," 
 
 44 Old philosopher," I said, 44 You're you, anyway, and that's 
 good enough for me a thousand times over," 
 
 44 Army !" he said, vehemently, 44 The war ! I tell you, it bites 
 right into me to think of it, I reckon I've gone dippy; but I aches 
 with — with I dunno wot, when I remembers the jokes an' the 'orrors, 
 and the camps an' the trenches as I thought was 'ell, 'Ell it was, 
 for sure; yet I wish I was back. Wot a time ! An' wot 'ave we 
 made of it ? Nothin' 1" 
 
 44 Make it, Frank ! You've got the chance this minute. Decide 
 quick. Go on. Choose, Every agony of the war was worth it, 
 if you save yourself along of it, ♦ , ," 
 
 He got up and faced round, and in his turn put his hands upon 
 my shoulders, 
 
 44 If it's to be, it'll be," said he, smiling very gently, “ But not 
 now. Can't, Will I some day ? 'Oo knows. But for now, I 
 can't, I never lies to you," 
 
 His smile died out, I made a little cross on his forehead and he 
 accepted it. He turned back very abruptly and sat down, I went 
 
 7 
 
98 MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 out, but looked round, at the door, and was horror-struck to 
 see him crouching there, his shoulders shaking* I didn't dare 
 return; but through all the streets to the railway, and on the vacant 
 haggard platform, and through the roar of the headlong journey 
 homewards, I couldn't rid myself of the vision of the sobbing man; 
 and not the fathomless black sky and the fields drowned in darkness 
 seemed so lonely as his loneliness* 
 
Chapter XI 
 
 I N the early summer the crisis I had foreseen occurred* Reggie 
 Orwylstree wrote to ask if he could call in one night after 
 dinner, and when he came I was shocked to see how ill he 
 looked* 
 
 44 D'you mind/' he said, almost at once , 44 if we come right away 
 to business ? Matters have come to such a point that I'm nearly 
 going off my head*" 
 
 “ It's about Barbara, is it ?" 
 
 44 Well, it is, in part* You know I've been in love with her for 
 years* I asked her long ago, and she didn't say No, and I think 
 she wanted to say Yes* But she told me it was out of the question 
 for her to think about marrying as long as her father needed her so 
 much* And she didn't think an indefinite engagement was fair* 
 But if she'd been really sure, she wouldn't have minded that* She 
 wasn’t sure, I could see, and in a way I didn't mind, because I felt 
 so certain it would work out all right if only I waited* And it was 
 absolutely everything for me to have something like that to — well, 
 to wait for, and occupy me, and so on* Everything ♦" 
 
 “ Well, aren't things going as you'd hoped ?" 
 
 44 Father, I can't help seeing she isn't any surer* In fact, I can't 
 help feeling that, if anything, she doesn't love me like — like that* 
 And now here's where I begin to feel such a brute* I keep thinking 
 she's really in love with Blake* Mind you, I'm not sure of that, 
 either* But a lot of little things make me think so* And, of course, 
 I love her far too much to dream of — of not wanting her to go where 
 she really does love; though, my God, it's difficult to resign one's 
 self to it* But that's not nearly the worst*" 
 
 He got up and leaned on the mantelpiece and stared into the 
 grate* He went on talking without looking up* 
 
 44 What's so awful is this* I'm definitely sure she wouldn't marry 
 Blake, or anyone, unless he was a Catholic* Now I told you Blake 
 positively haunts me in order to question me about Catholicism* 
 
 99 
 
100 MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 He's always at it* And he's learning very fast* I think he'll be 
 one*" 
 
 “ I see*" 
 
 “ But do you see ?" he cried, wnh the harshness of real suffering 
 in his voice* ** D'you see that every time I help him, I'm cutting 
 my own throat ? D'you realize that whenever I make it easier for 
 him to become a Catholic, I make it easier for her to marry him ? 
 I'm deliberately ruining my whole future if I do my duty, and 
 instruct him* D'you see that ?" 
 
 “ Yes, Reggie*" 
 
 44 At times I feel as if I wished I'd never become a Catholic if 
 I'm to be put through all this* Or I feel as if I wished I'd never 
 met you ; because you know what a rickety sort of Catholic I was at 
 first, and how I slacked off after the first plunge, and never studied 
 it up or anything* And then I met you and you put me through a 
 lot of reading and made me carry on thinking and pulling myself 
 together generally* And here am I, having to use what you taught 
 me in order to teach him ; I try to copy that method* And it works, 
 my God ! If only it didn*t work ! If only he was a rotter ! But 
 he's evidently sincere* He hates it, but he prays* He's going 
 through a little hell, too* But with what a prize at the end of it I 
 Everything together* The best of both worlds* And what's left 
 for me ? A heavenly crown, I suppose," he said, bitterly* 44 At 
 times I hate Blake*" 
 
 44 You must have been very loyal in the past, Reggie," I said, “ if 
 God is asking you to become so like Our Lord* There was nothing 
 He didn't have to sacrifice for the sake of our salvation* He knew 
 that if He preached, He'd be heading straight for death* If He 
 raised Lazarus, He knew He'd be finally signing His own death 
 warrant* But He always 4 set His face steadfastly towards Jerusa- 
 lem*' He had a cup to drink, and He felt 4 straitened,' ill at ease, 
 restless , if I dare say so, till He had drunk it up* It was an awful 
 cup : 4 If it be possible, let this chalice pass from Me*' And He 
 sweated blood in His agony* But He said to His friends , 4 Can you 
 drink My cup ?' They said 4 Yes,' and He took them at their word* 
 Or perhaps not quite ! The bitterest of the gall He kept for 
 Himself*" 
 
 44 I know it's a wrong idea," he said, miserably, 44 but I keep 
 saying to myself, 4 Well, He was God* He was all right, anyway* 
 Nothing could happen to Him in the long run.' But I'm just a man* 
 At times it's pretty awful to be a man at all* * * ." 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES ioi 
 
 44 It's because you're a man that He became a man — a real man* 
 Really man* Not pretending* Not just a disguise* The real 
 thing all through* ♦ ♦ *" 
 
 4 ' He didn't have to do this, exactly*" 
 
 44 His heart was worse broken* ♦ * ♦" 
 
 44 He seems to ask for everything*" 
 
 44 He gave everything first, Reggie* Be heroic, it's a chance that 
 mayn't come twice* Do the right thing* Christ asks you to help 
 Blake to the Faith* To salvation* Think of that only* Don't 
 think of consequences* Do Our Lord that service*" 
 
 44 But — oh, I can't explain 1 It makes me feel sick * I loathe the 
 whole idea, if you see what I mean* How could I put heart into it ? 
 How could I go on arguing, explaining, trying to do it well when I 
 knew that the better I did it the more I was committing a sort of 
 murder on my own life for ever and ever ?" 
 
 44 I know* Don't imagine — Reggie, please don't imagine — that 
 because I'm a priest, and this problem exactly can never trouble 
 me, that I don't understand* It's not easy for me to suggest the 
 heroic way to you* In a way it's harder, because I feel I sit comfort- 
 able here and am advising such a thing to you*" 
 
 44 Yes, yes; I know you're all right* You'd have to say what 
 you're saying, anyhow*" 
 
 44 Listen* I'm sure you'll remember Jock, the Scotch lad I took 
 you to see that time when you came to the hospital with me* You 
 know, he went through an agony of his own* You know he was 
 simply living for his girl, and she chucked him for an Australian, 
 and the Australian came to that very ward* And not only he never 
 let him guess, but he made himself especially friendly to the Austra- 
 lian, and he went through a perfectly frightful crisis of despair before 
 he died* It was a sublime heroism* He's a hero, and with the 
 Saints, I'm sure* Ask him to help you* Yes, if you'd seen him 
 before he died, desperate and dying without having really tasted 
 life * * * having sacrificed everything for nothing * * ♦" 
 
 44 Yes, but don't you see l He was dying* He couldn't have got 
 anything more, anyhow * But I've got to live* I've got to empty 
 out my whole future* And how can I do it ? How can I possibly 
 live as I should when the one good thing in life is denied me; when 
 I deny it to myself ? It'll be awful for me not to be able to marry 
 and live as I want to* I'm not strong enough; I'm not really* How 
 can I get along without any satisfaction, without hope even ? Even 
 if she chucked me, it would be tolerable* I'd leave her free to; 
 
102 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 I'd respect her. But it's so wanton ! I have equivalently to chuck 
 her, and see her with him, and — when all the while Fd fetch and 
 carry for her on my hands and knees, if only I could be with her. 
 It's asking too much." 
 
 4 4 Listen; we must be careful. It's not certain, yet, that she wants 
 to marry you. Nor that she'd marry Blake, Catholic or not. And 
 suppose you dropped him, and suppose he didn't become a Catholic, 
 and that she would have married him if he had, but agreed to marry 
 you because he didn't — well, you couldn't have put up with second- 
 hand love. And, put it at the worst — if it is the worst ! Suppose 
 he becomes a Catholic and she marries him — well, you've offered 
 your supreme sacrifice and you suffer. But it is the difference 
 between time and Eternity. You've done a thing which'll increase 
 your union with God and Our Lord, since you obviously do it for 
 their sakes only — no selfishness can come in; and you'll win for her 
 — oh, anything you like to ask, I should think ! And what won't 
 you have done for him . So your eternal union will be incomparably 
 more intimate with her than ever your marriage could bring about." 
 
 He sighed very heavily. 
 
 44 Oh, well," said he, 44 I'll do it. I never meant not to, you 
 know. Still — it is my life that's at stake." 
 
 44 I know," I said. 44 And you'll have given your life for your 
 friend." 
 
 44 I can't honestly call Blake my friend." 
 
 44 I didn't mean Blake," I said. 
 
 He turned round and looked hard at me under his level brows. 
 Then he turned abruptly back. 
 
 44 I'll tell you what I'd like," I went on. 44 In three weeks I'll 
 be giving a Retreat at Hayland. Come and make it. And bring 
 Blake." 
 
 He sighed and said, 44 All right," and then went away. 
 
 * * * * * 
 
 The weeks flashed by, and the three of us found ourselves in the 
 train for Hayland. It was all rather strained, I thought; conversa- 
 tion was difficult. Reggie had never made a retreat before, and, of 
 course, Blake hadn't; they were both rather strung up and doubtful 
 what they were in for. 
 
 Hayland hasn't much of the rich fields left from which it got, I 
 suppose, its name. It is a manufacturing town, and very opulent 
 and self-satisfied, except in the places you don't see, where the 
 houses tumble down and crush people, perhaps just when the money- 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 103 
 
 kings are dining in hotels not five hundred yards away* But the 
 retreat house lay well outside the town; you taxied first through 
 districts most desolate and grey; endless grey houses, where flam- 
 boyant posters put the only colour, and where the open spaces were 
 the play-yards of poor-schools, vast sheets of asphalt, with iron 
 railings round them, innumerable rods riveted into the low brick 
 walls* You came at last to a square, graced by the statue of some 
 philanthropist, a clock and a drinking fountain, and then the suburbs 
 began, red brick and yellowish stone and shining encaustic tiles* 
 Clipped holly hedges surrounded feudal castles, complete (you felt 
 sure) with loop-holes and portcullis, built seventy years ago by some 
 potentate, since gone bankrupt; massive gates with wrought iron 
 lamps above them opened on to rolled gravel drives, hedged again 
 with laurustinus, rhododendrons, and more holly; you caught 
 glimpses of the turreted garage, or lawns, with their monkey-puzzle 
 trees and geranium beds* ♦ ♦ ♦ These, too, we passed, and at last 
 the real country came, beyond where the trams stopped; and we 
 had been fortunate to acquire a great farm, very old, with wide 
 fields round it, adjoining the ground of a little Catholic church 
 which served that neighbourhood* 
 
 We disembarked, and forgot everything else in the business of 
 arrival; the great living-room already had some half-dozen men in 
 it, smoking, rather shy at first, but cheery and glad to meet us* 
 From then till six, other men kept dropping in — chiefly miners, and 
 men employed in small businesses, and clerks; one or two successful 
 persons; a policeman, a music-hall artist, and a publican* But at 
 four we began with a generous tea; bread and margarine, and two 
 enormous cakes, baked on the premises, very plain, but hot* Tea 
 unloosed their tongues, and friendliness, at the end, was well in- 
 augurated* 
 
 After a cigarette we went up to the attic which had been turned 
 into the chapel, though the Blessed Sacrament was not yet there* 
 Then I explained what the retreat was meant to be* 
 
 I told them the story I had long ago told to the Corporal, about 
 Tomlinson, the man who came to nothing, who never thought his 
 own thoughts, who made no choices of his own, but drifted, and 
 ended nowhere* Impossible that we should consent to sink so low* 
 Yet life is an effort, and we get tired* It is fatally easy to accept, 
 merely, the ideas of others, the conventional view; to let oneself be 
 pushed about by circumstances, never to master one's life; to be no 
 true self , in thought or will* Nearly all these men had been through 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 104 
 
 the war; that, in itself, had made personal thought so hard; had made 
 effort, now that the army's pressure was removed, often impossible* 
 And since the war, what national chaos ! In consequence, what 
 despondency 1 How little principle, how much sheer search for 
 the momentary pleasure which should compensate for the day's 
 drudgery, and cheat a future which might be disastrous and 
 was, anyhow, so uncertain* * * . The retreat was to evoke 
 thoughts — real thoughts, true personal convictions, and put them 
 in due order; and was to brace the will — to build up the whole 
 personality* 
 
 Then I explained very briefly the supreme importance of silence, 
 and then said we would go to the church and bring back the Blessed 
 Sacrament* 
 
 The men lined up outside, taking with them a cross and the two 
 candles* Reciting the joyous mysteries of the Rosary, we went to 
 the little church, sang the O Salutaris , and returned* As we walked, 
 we sang the hymns Sweet Sacrament , and Jesus, My Lord ; the 
 evening wa s warm and still; the sun, not setting yet, was more 
 golden and more mellow than in the afternoon, and all the peace of 
 an evening in early June was round about us* Incomparably sweet 
 were those brief processions through the field and gardens; the most 
 simple faith breathed in them; all the men knew that a Presence had 
 come to the house that was not there before, and that they had been 
 its escort* Several spontaneously stayed in the Chapel to adore its 
 Occupant; the rest went out to the garden to smoke, or I showed 
 them where their rooms were* There were six single rooms, in- 
 cluding mine; the others slept in two rooms which had been arranged 
 as dormitories. 
 
 At half-past six they returned to the chapel and had their first real 
 44 meditation," upon man and God, and the why of man's creation* 
 They isolated themselves; they were each a lonely self; neighbours 
 were forgotten* And God was recalled to them; Infinite Spirit and 
 Eternal; yet intimately present; alone truly present, now, to each* 
 And He had made them* Why ? Made them, and was preserving 
 them. Had preserved them till the war, and through it* They had 
 not fallen. And had placed them among a chosen few, the chosen 
 minority of Catholics in this land; and from among Catholics, had 
 called them out into this strange week-end; out of the hundreds of 
 thousands in that city, they were the only men — perhaps some, out 
 of their town or village, were each the one man — to be thus in 
 retreat* And why ? We refused, for the time being, to answer the 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 105 
 
 question, and they remained kneeling in the twilight chapel, con- 
 fronting that terrific, probing mystery* * * * 
 
 I found Blake, and asked him if he were all right* He looked 
 rather dazed, but answered 0 Yes*” In a few minutes the bell rang 
 for supper* 
 
 It consisted of mutton-pie, rice pudding, and jam, bread and 
 margarine, and tea* Simple enough, but the food was cleanly 
 served, and the table gay with flowers* I insisted on that; it cheered 
 the men, and made them think better of themselves* During supper, 
 a miner from Staffordshire read from a book about the history of 
 retreats, especially in this country* He read with immense energy 
 and conviction, with a sturdy Cannock voice, and loved the job* 
 
 After that there was a half-hour's recreation, and I selected and 
 coached my staff for Benediction* The policeman and the publican 
 were altar-boys, and I gave the incense to the plutocrat manager of 
 some immense linoleum works near by* (He did it very badly, I 
 may say, and was much chaffed next day by the miners, who knew 
 their ceremonies backwards*) So at 8*45 we returned to the chapel; 
 Reggie played the harmonium, and the Staffordshire men sang with 
 the real beauty and force I always expected from them* Imme- 
 diately after Benediction the answer to the 44 Why ?” was given; the 
 old-fashioned answer: God has done all this that we might save our 
 souls* Not waste them* Become the reverse of Tomlinson; 
 become the complete man, natural and supernatural, God wants us 
 to be* And because in the tiny week-end retreats, which were all 
 that these men could afford — and even that meant sacrifice — we had 
 to hasten, we at once mentioned Death, not as a melancholy and 
 depressing topic, not as a finish to existence, but as exhilarating, a 
 stimulus, a reminder that this great enterprise of salvation had its 
 time-limit* Now was an interspace, a break in the midst of our 
 years, so that if life so far had been squandered, if I have risked losing 
 myself, I may quickly recover, and start succeeding* * * * And the 
 vision of their own lives was summoned to their memories ; they saw 
 themselves children, boys; making their first communion, offered 
 by their mothers to Our Lady, consecrated to Mary, never forgotten 
 by her, prayed for by her at that 44 now ” which is each moment of 
 our lives* * * * It was here, I always noticed, that the men first 
 really sank into their retreats; they still sat motionless, eyes riveted 
 on the speaker, missing not one word, but the consciousness of 
 attending, the explicit resolve to be doing the thing well, had relaxed; 
 all went on naturally, and minds flowed spontaneously in the channels 
 
106 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 of these old thoughts which life had weakened perhaps and dimmed, 
 but now revived — powerful, compelling, and yet peaceful* They 
 felt themselves still they, still the children they had forgotten they 
 ever could have been; still with Jesus loving them, and with their 
 Mother. So, after the De Profundis for the souls suffering in Purga- 
 tory, and their own night prayers, they went slowly up to bed. 
 
 The house became quiet and dark, though the windows still held 
 the amethyst June twilight, and from the wide, fragrant country 
 floated the scents and gentle sounds of evening; distant cries, the 
 voice of a child, of a song, came too; transformed, etherealized, not 
 injuring the great tranquillity. 
 
 In twenty minutes I looked into the dormitories to say good- 
 night. I asked new-comers if they were liking it; they grinned up 
 at me from their pillows, honest faces, towselled mops of hair, great 
 children lying there, to be put to bed, and tucked up and blessed. 
 They were all happy. 
 
 I went then to the single rooms, where I had put men with whom I 
 thought I'd value the last few minutes of each day alone. Not yet 
 were they quite at ease; the morrow had its apprehensiveness; con- 
 fession still awaited them; but they felt, I guessed, that everything 
 would be well, that the effort would not be cruel. Then I went to 
 Reggie. He was still sitting at his window, letting the night air 
 bathe his thoughts, and the silence speak to them. 
 
 44 Better turn in, Reggie,” I said. 
 
 He looked at me without speaking, and in that thin light the 
 shadows under his eyes were very dark. 
 
 “ It's going all right, isn't it ?” 
 
 He smiled half ruefully. 
 
 44 It doesn't give a man a chance,” he said. 
 
 I was too awestruck at the thought of what God was working in 
 his soul, to talk much. I asked him to say some prayers for me, 
 so that I shouldn't do anything wrong in the course of the retreat. 
 He got up, smiled, and began to undress. So I went on, at once, 
 to Blake. 
 
 He was sitting on his bed, half undressed. I perched myself on 
 the end of it. 
 
 44 Well, Geoffrey,” I said, 44 who'd have supposed, when we 
 originally met, that ten months later I'd be sitting on your bed — 
 respectfully telling you to shut your eyes and go to sleep like a good 
 boy ?” 
 
 44 I'm not a bit sleepy,” he said, with a grin. 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 107 
 
 44 Well, you ought to be. You've got to sleep eight hours solid. 
 But tell me first if you're feeling pretty comfortable." 
 
 “ First-rate," he said, briskly. 44 Enjoying it no end. Got the 
 wind down, anyway. I tell you I had it properly up when we 
 arrived." 
 
 44 How d'you like the men ?" 
 
 44 Gorgeous chaps, aren't they ! By Jove, what one loses, only 
 knowing one sort of man. You saw what fine fellows they were in 
 the army, even, but as an officer you couldn't really get at 'em. Nor 
 in my present job, of course." 
 
 44 You got on all right at recreation ?" 
 
 44 Absolutely. No difficulty whatever. Palled up at once. I 
 couldn't have believed it of myself. But they took me naturally, and 
 so I took them naturally. How's it done ? I believe this is abso- 
 lutely the only place in England where it could happen." 
 
 44 Oh, there are other retreat houses besides this one." 
 
 44 Well, only in retreat houses, then." 
 
 44 I daresay. And d'you like the retreat itself ?" 
 
 44 I'm not properly in it, of course, yet. But I say, it's a terror for 
 forcing one to look facts in the face ! Why am I here ? What's 
 life for ? By Jove, I'd never thought of it before. I've been a perfect 
 kid in life l Hopping round, enjoying it, grousing, thinking I was 
 a man of the world — but, well, as I say, I'm a perfect kid. It ought 
 to last for a week, though, this sort of thing. I shall only just be 
 getting into it when it's time to leave." 
 
 44 I know; it's a pity. But the men can't help themselves." 
 
 44 You know. I'm not really into it yet ! I feel as if it was all going 
 on around me — I'm looking at it — I agree to all of it — but I'm not 
 living it exactly. . . ." 
 
 44 I think you will, to-morrow. But I also think you must look 
 forward to making your first real Catholic retreat some day. You 
 know, you want the Sacraments. . . ." 
 
 44 Well, padre, I expect you're right. Orwylstree's been telling 
 me a good bit about 'em. I see their point. And look here, padre !" 
 
 44 Well ?" 
 
 44 How about — well, confession ? Can you hear mine ?" 
 
 44 I can't give you sacramental absolution yet, old boy. But we 
 can talk about what you like." 
 
 44 Well, look here. Could I make a sort of informal one to- 
 morrow ? Get a lot off my chest unofficially, so to say ? And get 
 some advice ?" 
 
io8 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 44 It might be quite a good thing, if you like/' I answered. 
 
 44 Then that's that/' he said, satisfied. “ I wanted to ask that." 
 
 I smacked his head gently, made a little cross on his forehead, and 
 went. ♦ . . 
 
 Next day. Mass, and then breakfast. Breakfast was porridge and 
 bacon, and the Staffordshireman finished reading about retreats, 
 war-time retreats this time. About ten, the hard work began. 
 This meditation was on sin; always pursuing our ideal of building up, 
 sin was represented as destructive, as crippling, as defiance of the 
 whole law of life, mercifully revealed by God to us in conscience, 
 and through His Church, for our success. ♦ ♦ ♦ After the talk, and 
 the few minutes' quiet thought upon it, I entrusted the men to the 
 plutocrat and made him take them, saying the Sorrowful Mys- 
 teries, to a statue of Calvary in the garden. Then they separated, 
 and walked or read. Meanwhile, their visits began; they sat and 
 smoked and talked, one by one, and as usual I felt that never in my 
 life should I be able to admire enough the amazing force of the lived 
 Catholicism, the sturdy growth pushing itself up in souls distracted 
 by Heaven knows what complications of our modern life 1 The 
 frightful entanglements of business; how to be honest and succeed ? 
 How cope with rivals, how make a prosperous home; how associate 
 almost, with your fellows in the trade, or the firm, and not violate 
 Catholic justice and truth ? Yet they put up the fight; yet was the 
 unseen, unadvertised, unexhilarating sacrifice of sheer money, for 
 the sake of righteousness, going forward bravely in that smoky, 
 sweating town. And in family life, what secret heroisms ! What 
 obedience to the Catholic law of marriage; what self-control; what 
 renunciation of little social glories, little haloes of this school or that 
 to v/hich children were not sent, because their faith would be 
 endangered. Trivial glories ? Tinsel haloes ? Perhaps. But it 
 needed a strong will to keep the mind's eye clear for realizing that ! 
 So to retreat they came, to purify the sight, to give the will its tonic. 
 And the men from the pits, fighters mostly, tempted to be drinkers 
 — clean-lived, they mostly were. And one but lately from the navy, 
 where chaplains were hard to come by and Catholics were more 
 than usually isolated, and when spells on shore meant, for most, 
 only two sources of enjoyment. What fights for their chastity ! 
 What dogged tolerance of ridicule ! What good-will to be lonely ! 
 One or two were despondent; the struggle had been too hard, or 
 seemed likely to become so ; others had failed, and found the work of 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 109 
 
 the retrieving of their innocence appalling; others, again and again, 
 were thrown, and mauled and half-slaughtered (they would feel) 
 by sin* One by one they came, and left after their talk refreshed, 
 the load removed, ready for God's own healing Absolution* 
 
 But there was another meditation before dinner* And since we 
 had promised ourselves to leave no fact unlooked at , we thought 
 first of the eternal consequence, possible for all of us, of sin; not 
 merely misery and disease, but hell, and the self become waste- 
 product, due for the refuse heap* But at once I related to the men 
 Our Lord's story of the prodigal, and, as always, it was here their 
 faces showed, not only that the retreat had invaded and possessed 
 them, but that it was picking them up, building them up, putting 
 them on their feet and setting them to walk over a road however 
 rough towards the Fatherhood of God* 
 
 Dinner, which was solid and helped out by a dish that looked like 
 tipsy cake, but wasn't ; and cider to assist digestion* The reading 
 was the children's book of stories about Our Lord, which I long 
 ago lent to the Sergeant* Then recreation* Blake found himself 
 playing stump cricket with the miners; the plutocrat himself took 
 a hand, but was no better as batsman than as thurifer* The music- 
 hall artist, a man of a profoundly doleful countenance, which he 
 altered suddenly, at long intervals, into a singularly charming smile, 
 did solemn tricks with coins and bits of string, and ended by tying 
 himself up in a quite alarming knot, for he was also a contortionist* 
 But, on the whole, the men's week of work had tired them; they 
 liked to lie flat — for the day was glorious — and watch the wide sky, 
 and smell the grass* The only real incident was caused by a certain 
 wild young miner, called Mick Brophy, mounting an aged horse 
 which, you'd have thought, not Etna in eruption could have scared 
 into activity, but which abruptly woke up, careered frantically round 
 the field, and deposited the exultant youth into a hawthorn hedge* 
 They spent the rest of the day picking the thorns out* 
 
 Geoffrey Blake and I wandered off to a stile, and we, too, watched 
 the butterflies and flowers, and absorbed the country* He related 
 his life, but, I kept feeling, almost more as a history told for the first 
 time, more as something not himself he was handing over, than in 
 the way I wanted, and he needed* Similarly, I felt he was getting 
 the retreat itself as an interesting outside thing, on the whole, and 
 contemplating even his own conversion as a new thing he might 
 possibly do rather than as a new thing he'd be * 
 
 So I told him I'd explain the topic we'd been speaking of, during 
 
IXO 
 
 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 the next afternoon talk; and I resolved to be bold, and tell him that 
 night what, after all, he could so easily have guessed for himself, 
 what Reggie was really doing, from sheer love of God, when he 
 seemed to be just instructing him. I knew Reggie would trust me. 
 
 We had, therefore, our afternoon conference out of doors, sitting 
 round the Calvary. Never, one would think, can a man hear some 
 subjects, that so poignantly concern him, discussed, save in a tainted 
 atmosphere, and amid what are blasphemies, in truth, of God's 
 great laws of life. They emerged, always, from that conference, 
 joyous, expansive, difficult to control; and I let them talk at tea. 
 
 After the Glorious Mysteries of the Rosary we had the evening 
 talk. It lasted long, and was about Our Lord, His Humanity, His 
 intimacy of friendship, and yet His Kingship, His Kingdom, and the 
 Crusade of that Kingdom against sin and all evil. What though the 
 Crusade meant humiliation, often enough; suffering, possibly even 
 death ? He had borne it first; He asked nothing save what He had 
 given; He had had His Passion; He had died. Christ's Christians 
 would not shirk that, they would ask for it. ♦ ♦ ♦ 
 
 At once, after this meditation, the Blessed Sacrament was exposed. 
 The men, in couples, made a Guard of Honour, and each couple 
 watched before it in silence for a quarter of an hour. Many had 
 doubted whether they could occupy themselves for such a space; 
 none found it difficult; many outstayed their watch. Reggie, when 
 once or twice I looked in, seemed always there. In that time, heart 
 spoke to Heart; Christian to Christ; soldier to Captain; friend to 
 Friend. But what they said was wordless, and rarely would a man 
 speak afterwards of what had been done, nor would I ask. 
 
 At supper the story of the Passion was read ; and after Benediction 
 a short final meditation was given, chiefly on the Sacraments, and on 
 tlie duties of a Catholic life, especially to one's fellowmen; and 
 resolutions — very brief, but powerful — were outlined. 
 
 Such men as had not yet made their general confessions, made them 
 after that, and soon the house, once more, sank into quietness. 
 
 Reggie was again at his window. He turned round when I came 
 in, moved a step forward, and took both my hands. 
 
 44 It'll be all right," he said. Then he said: 44 Give me your 
 blessing." 
 
 I blessed him and he nodded, and turned back to the window. 
 
 I went to Blake. 
 
 44 Hullo," he said, “ come and sit down." 
 
 I established myself on the edge of his bed. 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 hi 
 
 44 Well, how goes it ?" 
 
 44 Fine, thanks 1 And I can't tell you how grateful I am to you 
 for fetching me along here/' 
 
 44 You really liked it ?" 
 
 44 Oh, it's a great experience. Everyone ought to be put through 
 it. Wish it lasted a week. I promise you I will come again when 
 I'm a full-fledged Catholic." 
 
 44 D'you think you've made up your mind to be one, then ?" 
 
 44 Well — yes," he said, a little more soberly. 44 It seems to me 
 incontrovertible. I don't see how I can get out of it. Old Orwyls- 
 tree's done the devil of a lot for me, you know. Fine chap." 
 
 44 You really think you'd be doing grave wrong if you didn't become 
 a Catholic ?" 
 
 44 Oh yes. I've gone too far to turn back with impunity now." 
 
 44 You really value it ? You're not just afraid of seeming incon- 
 sistent ? I don't mean to me, but to yourself." 
 
 44 Look here, you once asked me what I'd do if I became an R.C. 
 and Barbara chucked me. Well, I'd stick to it. And I'd go on 
 further. If she chucked me now, I'd still become an R.C. I can't 
 say more than that, can I ?" 
 
 44 That's certainly saying a lot. Listen. Suppose it meant your 
 being cut off with a shilling. You and Barbara couldn't live on 
 what you get for your job. And suppose she'd got no personal 
 income. I don't know what she's got. But say, nothing. Well, 
 becoming a Catholic would mean you couldn't marry her. Would 
 you become one, then, if she said she'd marry you as a Protestant ?" 
 
 44 I don't think it's fair to ask me that. It's life or death to me, 
 marrying her." 
 
 44 D'you think you could love your faith more than your life ?" 
 
 44 I wish you wouldn't ask. I don't know. Does anybody ?" 
 
 44 Geoffrey. Now, listen to me. You say Orwylstree's been 
 helping you a lot. I don't think you realize what he's been doing. 
 He loves Barbara, and has loved her for years. And as deeply as you 
 do, old boy. At least that. And if you'd not appeared, I think it 
 1 would have been a clear course for him. I expect they'd have been 
 married by now, or engaged, anyway. But he thinks she wants to 
 ! marry you. I don't know whether he's right. But he's sure, and 
 I there he is right, she won't marry you unless you're a Catholic. 
 Well, every word he says to you, to help you to become a Catholic, 
 is a knife into his own chances, see ? Every step he takes you towards 
 the faith is a new death warrant he's signing for himself. At least 
 
1 12 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 he thinks so. So you see. He's done that because he loves his 
 faith better than himself, his life, and Barbara. He believes in it 
 so much that he'll work to give it to you, at that cost. It's been 
 absolute hell to him; he felt he couldn't go on; that's why he came 
 here. That's been what he's been up against in this retreat. And 
 he's triumphed, or God's Grace in him has, for it was superhuman." 
 
 He lay absolutely silent. At last he said: 
 
 “ That's a knock-out. Perhaps you'd not mind going and leaving 
 me to think this out. No. Don't go. Stay a bit, but don't talk." 
 
 I remained till I had said a Rosary. Then he rolled over on to his 
 side, but still said nothing. I made the sign of the cross on his fore- 
 head, and said good-night. 
 
 Next morning the Mass was said early. The men all made their 
 Communion, and then tramped off to the local station or the trams, 
 into the difficult world that was no more so difficult, since God went 
 with them. 
 
Chapter XII 
 
 E ARLY in July I received a frightened little letter from Miss 
 Silver, saying she'd gone to Halbutt Row, and that the 
 Corporal was gone* The fish-shop was still there, but with 
 a different name above it* She had gone in, but the man had been 
 rude, and had refused all information* 
 
 I went up to London as soon as I could, and managed to get to 
 the place, as before, about closing time; and there, to be sure, was 
 44 C* McCurdy ," in large letters, above the window* 
 
 The burly unknown man behind the counter appeared surprised 
 when I went in* I certainly didn't look like a customer for fish* 
 
 “ Excuse me," I said, “ but can you tell me where Mr* Newnes 
 has gone ?" 
 
 44 F* Newnes ?" he queried* 44 'Opped it this couple o' months* 
 Bit behind the times, Mister*" 
 
 44 How do you mean, 4 hopped it 9 ?" 
 
 44 Bust* Sold up* 'Opped it* Na poo," said he* 
 
 44 But have you any idea where he is ?" 
 
 44 Me ? 'Ow should I ? 'E can fry in his own fat, for me*" 
 
 44 But look here; he was a great friend of mine*" 
 
 44 'E was ? Sorry for you* Don't think much o' your taste*" 
 
 “ Oh, well, he suited me all right* But you'll do me the greatest 
 kindness, Mr* McCurdy, if you can help me to find him*" 
 
 44 Preach 'im a little sermon, would you ? Save your breath, 
 Mister*" 
 
 “ Look, Mr* McCurdy, don't worry about me, please ♦ Cut me 
 out* I want to see Frank Newnes* If you know where he is, I'd 
 be extremely grateful if you'd tell me* You mayn't have liked him, 
 and perhaps he did you a bad turn* D'you mind if I ask you to 
 forget it for a moment and tell me what I want, if you can ?" 
 
 44 Well," he said , 44 you speak straight* Pass into the back parlour, 
 if you've a moment, an' when I've shut up I'll be along*" 
 
 I went in and stared at the grate, now empty, where Frank and I 
 had watched the fire* At last he came in* 
 
 II 3 
 
MR, FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 114 
 
 44 Will you 'ave a drop ?" said he* 
 
 44 Thanks very much/' 
 
 44 That's right/' he said* 44 See you're a man after all/ 
 
 Much as I dislike having my masculinity assessed by my capacity 
 for alcohol, and though I absolutely loathe gin, I grinned and 
 pledged him* 
 
 44 Now about this Newnes," he said* 44 There ain't much to tell. 
 Bit of a dark 'orse, Newnes* Don't know where he got his money 
 from in the first instance* Bit 'ere and a bit there, I reckon, same 
 as 'e did off me, me havin' picked him up through a mutual acquaint- 
 ance on the ra2&le at Brighton as I thought I could trust* More 
 fool me*" 
 
 He then told me a complicated story about some financial arrange- 
 ment, which I couldn't follow, but which issued, anyhow, in his 
 having the right to claim the furniture, if Frank couldn't pay him by 
 a certain date* I gathered Frank had failed with the shop, had given 
 over the furniture and had sold what he could and paid part of his 
 debts with the proceeds, and had vanished* 
 
 I sat silent, very depressed* Then he said: 
 
 44 Now, then, Mister, I've told you what I know, an' it ain't much* 
 But in return I want you to let me ask you a question*" 
 
 44 Right-ho ! Fire away 1" 
 
 44 You say you're a friend of Frank Newnes* Now is that pulpit- 
 talk, or d'you mean it ?" 
 
 44 I certainly like him very much and I think he likes me very 
 much*" 
 
 44 Well, you couldn't answer straighter than that ! But I owns 
 meself beaten* A gentleman of your callin' an' Frank Newnes likin' 
 one another very much ? Gawd Almighty ! It's a marvel*" 
 
 44 Why ?" 
 
 44 I likes you when you says 4 why ' like that," said he, slapping 
 my back so hard that I began to wonder if he were a little 
 drunk* 44 4 Why ?' 'e says, cool as you please* 4 Why ?' 'e says 
 to me*" 
 
 44 Well, why ? And why shouldn't I say 4 why ' ?" said I, begin- 
 ning to be annoyed* 
 
 44 I'll tell you," said he* 44 One: because there's few as stands up 
 to C* McCurdy in this street, nor yet in many another; two: because 
 no parson's been known to do it, so far, anyways* But I likes it, and 
 here's my hand*" 
 
 44 Here's mine," I said, more and more bewildered* 44 But I wish 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 115 
 
 you'd tell me why I oughtn't to like Frank Newnes* I thought 
 most people liked him/' 
 
 44 Some did/' he acknowledged , 44 for 'e's a tongue in 'is 'ead as'll 
 make 'em laugh* But also 'e's a tongue as is a bit too sharp, and 
 layin' into 'em he had been, lately, as I'm told, and more'n a bit* 
 And as for language ! Well, I heard 'im myself at that , and 'Eaven 
 'elp us, I couldn't 'old a candle to 'im meself, and I'm reckoned hot 
 stuff at the language*" 
 
 “ It takes him like that sometimes* But with a lot of people, the 
 more they talk, the less they do*" 
 
 44 Do ? 'E done me, anyway* For that furniture didn't com- 
 pensate me for what I give 'im, not by 'arf* And do ? 'Arf the 
 devilment o' the district was due to him, if you ask me* See the 
 devil in 'is eye, you could* No mistakin' it*" 
 
 44 Oh, well, pretty innocent devilment* And I think he's quieted 
 down a lot since his wound, and so on*" 
 
 44 Innocent ? You ask the girls, Mister, and you'll hear whether 
 it was innocent*" 
 
 44 I think you're wrong there* He told me — oh well, I think 
 you're wrong* You haven't evidence, have you ?" 
 
 44 Ah, that's where the gist of the matter lies* All the girls of the 
 place was mad for Frank Newnes, Esquire, with 'is gentleman's ways 
 and his forelock; but 'e'd got 'em so well in his power that you'd 
 not get one of 'em to own up to nothing, and as for 'im, give himself 
 away, d'you think ? Not 'e* Dark 'orse, as I told you* Sly* 
 Evidence ? Course not* But you don't take C* McCurdy in just 
 'cos there's no evidence*" 
 
 “ Well, let's give him the benefit of the doubt," I said smiling, and 
 getting up to go* 
 
 He pushed me back again* 
 
 “ Don't go yet, if you've not got to* This is a bit of novelty to 
 me, 'avin' a parson sittin' in me parlour* An' before you an' me 
 'as our chat. I'll say this for your Mr* Frank Newnes* Generous 'e 
 was; open-'anded to a fault* Chuck 'is money about reckless, while 
 'e 'ad any* Did a powerful sight o' good turns too, unbeknownst* 
 Cropped up after 'e'd 'opped it* But when drunk, oo ! You look 
 out for yourself* Red in 'is eye, had Newnes*" 
 
 44 I'm glad you noticed that, Mr* McCurdy* I mean about his 
 open-handedness* And you have to remember he'd been badly 
 gassed, and also very badly wounded* It was a great shock to 
 him* He was a highly-strung fellow, all nerves* And he'd had a 
 
n6 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 terribly bad time getting a job* And I expect when he thought he 
 had got one — you don't know how he'd been looking forward to 
 his shop — and then found it wasn't succeeding, it would make him 
 very — well, unequal; up and down* I always told him he was an old 
 cork* Push him right down, and he'd come up again* But if he 
 goes down and stays down, it'll be a bad look-out for him*" 
 
 44 Look here," he said , 44 you ought to get out of that black coat an' 
 dog-collar*" 
 
 44 I ? Why ? I'm a Catholic Priest and I " 
 
 44 Oh, are you ?" 
 
 44 Sure* * * * I never thought of mentioning it*" 
 
 44 Well, I don't know much about the Catholics meself* There's 
 some as reckons they're the best of a bad bunch* But this is it: 
 you ain't a bad sort, but I f ate your callin'* I f ate the Church. 
 Ch - - urch I" he drawled, contemptuously* 44 Drown the lot of 
 'em, if I had my way*" 
 
 44 Well, Mr* McCurdy, you may think I know only one word in 
 the English language, but why ?" 
 
 He laughed, and hit me again between the shoulders* I'd been 
 leaning forward, elbows on my knees* But I resolved to sit up- 
 right, from now on* * * ♦ 
 
 44 I'll tell you," he said, “ an' I'll tell you straight* First: you're 
 a Government department, see ? Now I'm agin the Government* 
 Therefore I'm agin you*" 
 
 44 Oh, I suppose you're alluding to the Established Church ? 
 Church of England* There's a lot in what you say* But we aren't 
 like that, I assure you*" 
 
 44 You're not ? How ain't you ?" 
 
 44 Two ways that I expect you'll understand* One is, we don't get 
 salaries from the Government* Not in this country* I think we 
 ought to* But we don't* But I ought to say in fairness that I don't 
 think the C* of E* salaries are a very important item against 'em* 
 Most parsons are miserably underpaid*" 
 
 44 Underpaid ? What's this I 'eard the Archbishop of Canter- 
 bury's worth ?" 
 
 44 He gets a lot* But he has to spend it* He certainly has a very 
 great deal to do indeed* Where oyer-paying comes in, if you ask 
 me, is in the middle sort of crowd of dignitaries, who haven't much 
 to do and have very comfortable houses in Cathedral towns, and so 
 on," said I, thinking, I fear, of the Very Rev* Alderman Canon 
 Chawner* 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 117 
 
 44 There's a thing you said there which I'll come back to/' said 
 he* “But what's your second point ?" 
 
 “ One minute* Honestly, the Catholic clergy are very poor 
 indeed * I can't think, in the whole country, of a class of men who 
 do so much work for so little* I'm not alluding to exceptions, who 
 are well off, or lazy, or both* I don't know any ' boths ' ! But to go 
 on; I think you'll like this* We have our beliefs, and we preach 'em, 
 and we have our orders and we transmit them and we obey them* 
 And any Government in the world could hammer at us till it was 
 sick and we were pulp, and we wouldn't obey if it was against our 
 belief or our orders* Take a case* Divorce* The Government 
 says people can be divorced; and ministers must re-marry divorced 
 folks* We say there's no such thing as divorce* If the Govern- 
 ment say, * These two people are divorced, re-marry them,' we say, 
 4 They aren't, and we won't*' And if we're sent to prison, or fined 
 for it, well, we go to prison and we pay*" 
 
 44 Ah," he said* 44 I admire that* The spirit , mind you* Not 
 what you say about divorce* I hold with divorce, and I reckon it's 
 the Government's job to settle just them things* But if you're 
 against it in your conscience, don't you let Government dictate to 
 you* Good for you, there* But these parsons ? Let the Govern- 
 ment walk straight over them, as it pleases*" 
 
 44 Well," said I, 44 they are a State creation* Kings and Queens 
 and Parliament began them* They didn't us* Christ began us* 
 But they hate the position they're in, and if you ask me, they won't 
 go on being in it; either a lot will come out, and come to us, or, 
 they'll be disestablished, and God knows what'll happen then; it'll 
 be the Church of England on its own, without props ; and I expect 
 it'll tumble down*" 
 
 44 Well, 'ere's my point two* What you said about them fine 
 'ouses* It's a society stunt, the Church is* Now I'm a socialist* 
 Society and socialist, see ? There's all the difference* If anything, 
 I'm Bolshy* I'm full out agin the gentry* As a class, mind you; not 
 this one nor that* Now the proof as the Church is gentry is, if 
 you're down right at the bottom, you goes nowhere* Follow the 
 Salvation band, may be; 'ang round a street orator; but go to church ? 
 Not them* Nor yet to chapel* Chapel's for the respectable class, 
 see ? The shopman* Me, if I 'ad religion* But religion ? In the 
 chapels ? What a hope ! Never nowhere such backbiting, gossip- 
 ing, slandering, and secret muck as in the chapelgoers* Howsome- 
 ever, make a bit more money, shift your street a bit upper, an' you 
 
n8 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 becomes Church. Automatic. Class, it is. And worse. Here's 
 me third point. It's tied up with what's worse nor class. An' wot's 
 that ? Money. Capital. Capital the Church stands for. Get a 
 parson to hit out and tell a capitalist he's grinding the faces o' God's 
 poor ? Not him. Tell a director o' these big stores and the like 
 they won't take 'is damned cheque because it stinks o' the blood an' 
 sweat of the poor from whom he's wrung it ? Catch them / Put 
 up a decent show agin these 'ousing scandals ? Tell a wealthy 
 patron they won't drink 'is champagne when the women 'e rack- 
 rents is too weak to feed their own brats ? Drink the champagne 
 every time, he will. And you say they're poor ! Well then, I say, 
 they're damn fools into the bargain, seein' as 'ow they believe in 
 money and fall down and worship money, and can't get none. In- 
 competent. No guts. And here's me fourth point. Look at 'em l 
 I says, look at 'em ! And listen to 'em. * Ur, me de-urr brurthren, 
 
 the Lurv o' Gurd bids me curm to yer ,' ow, I ' ates it. Cant. 
 
 Pulpit mush. The men knows it every time an' 'arf the women 
 knows it. I tell yer, there's more Lurv o' Gurd among a drunken 
 cursin' troop o' navvies an' sailors and 'arlots, if you will 'ave it, 
 than among that cantin' crowd." 
 
 “ Well," I said , 44 thanks for saying all that. It's your view, and 
 the view of a good many, and it's not the first time I've heard it. I'll 
 own there's something in it. There must be, or it would never have 
 existed. Or there was. I don't want you to think me a bigot, 
 Mr. McCurdy, but it stands to reason, after all, that I believe the 
 Catholic Church to be the true one, and, therefore, the other de- 
 nominations not so good; so you'll not be surprised if I say that the 
 faults you mention hardly exist with us, and never did to the same 
 extent as they do — well, elsewhere. I recognize with you that the 
 C. of E.'s a national concern in the sense it's restricted to this country 
 — for it's quite different in the colonies — but say an Imperial concern, 
 if you like; yet in another sense it's thoroughly un-national, for it 
 represents nothing in the nation whatsoever, not even the Govern- 
 ment nor the upper classes; it hasn't got a doctrine, nor yet a disci- 
 pline, and it seems to me to be there chiefly because it's difficult 
 to get rid of a large thing all at once. Mind you, I respect plenty 
 of people who belong to it, enormously; I envy their qualities; I 
 wish I used my religion as they do theirs. So I do any sincere 
 person, trying to do his best. But as for the C. of E. as an 
 institution, let alone the other sects, I can't see the point of it 
 at all, except for pageants and organizing philanthropic effort. 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 119 
 
 And it's none too necessary for that, now. Look at the 
 Y.M.C.A.” 
 
 44 Well, all this would carry more weight,” said he, reasonably, 
 44 if you was C. of E. yourself. Bein' R.C. you feel 'em rivals, and 
 go for 'em natural.” 
 
 44 We don't feel them rivals,” I said. 44 There's no real likeness 
 between us, as institutions. And I don't want to go for them; I'm 
 stating just what I think I see.” 
 
 44 And I agree,” said he, 44 but I'd lump your crowd in with the 
 C. of E.'s, or would till I learned they didn't deserve it.” 
 
 44 We've deserved part of it, in this way. The Catholic Church 
 is so absolutely sure that she stands for something unchanging, 
 permanent, constructive, that her representatives have always hated 
 revolutions, and have been apt to cling to what was established and 
 conservative, because to that extent she felt it was like herself, and 
 in sympathy with her. And since that sort of thing is what holds 
 the money-bags and controls the armies and the police, some of her 
 representatives have sometimes succumbed to the frightful tempta- 
 tion of relying on shekels and swords for help. But, as a rule, it 
 hasn't been so. As a rule, the history of the Church has been one 
 long struggle for the freedom of the spiritual conscience against 
 coercion; from the days when Christians were massacred by hun- 
 dreds of thousands for refusing to adore the Roman Caesar; through 
 the days when even Christian Emperors thought they could dictate 
 as to who was to be Bishop, who was to marry whom, and so on; to 
 the days when Kings tried to set up national religions which should 
 be under their thumb, and succeeded in England to a great extent; 
 on to our own days when the State tries to prevent us, for example, 
 teaching our children what we believe to be the most important 
 thing of all in Catholic schools, as they did in France and Germany, 
 and even here. Christ against Csesar, when Csesar's against Christ, 
 every time. And I want to be fair. Hasn't the Church persecuted 
 heretics ? Hasn't she burnt them ? Hasn't there been a Spanish 
 Inquisition ? Yes. But I won't tackle those questions of detail 
 now; I see you read,” said I, looking round at book-shelves well 
 laden. 44 I might send you something on that some day, to show 
 you I'm not shirking. But now I'm out for the principle, not the 
 more or less successful application here or there.” 
 
 44 Well,” he said, 44 what if you ain't succeeded nohow ? What I 
 say is, what's the Church good for in any one department, now ?” 
 
 44 The Church is what she has been,” I said. 44 In the first 300 
 
120 
 
 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 years of her existence, not only she emancipated conscience from 
 Caesar, but she revolutionized from within the lot of slaves, of women, 
 of the weak, even of gladiators. And in the second chapter of her 
 story it was she, her Popes, bishops and monasteries who carried 
 civilization forward at the moment when the Roman Empire col- 
 lapsed, in one sense, at any rate, and barbarian invasions brought 
 chaos with them. Through what are called the Dark Ages there 
 was a good deal of light, and the Church upheld all there was of it. 
 She saved the good elements of the past, held 'em together and 
 created the new — namely, Christendom, Christian Europe. And 
 the Middle Ages were the time when she most nearly succeeded. 
 Everything, from art to hospitals, from guilds to universities, sprang 
 up within her and by means of her; things were better , far, then — 
 sheer social well-being was, intellectual energy was — than 300 years 
 later, when nationalism and the anarchical movements in Germany 
 had broken Christendom to pieces. I don't expect you to swallow 
 that whole; I don't even want you to; but with all the qualifications 
 I'd like to put into it, if I had six hours instead of ten minutes, it 
 would still remain massively true. Look here 1 If ever we can 
 arrange for having public lectures on this sort of topic in this neigh- 
 bourhood, will you come ? And will you bring your pals who think 
 like you ?" 
 
 “ I will that," said he, " but you don't know what you're asking 
 for. You'll get some rare heckling." 
 
 “ Heckle away," said I, “ and, meanwhile, go and heckle in 
 Hyde Park on Sunday evenings, near the Marble Arch, where 
 you'll hear the Catholic Evidence League putting it a deal better 
 than I can." 
 
 “ But you won't deny," said he, 44 that the Church has always 
 been agin Socialism ? Now Vm a Socialist." 
 
 44 Socialism means so many different things. I maintain, Mr. 
 McCurdy, that our principles are as social, that is, as constructive 
 of a good Society, as any others, and better. It's partly our fault that 
 you don't know that. I can't conceive why every Catholic in 
 London doesn't belong to the Catholic Social Guild and tell you. 
 Train lecturers and never have a district in London without its 
 lectures going on. Oh, public lectures; undenominational halls, 
 public discussion — free and open, and something Catholic always 
 being told you. One month, social principles; the next, history; 
 the next, philosophy, I daresay; the next, sheer explanation of our 
 doctrine; and then social science once again. The responsibility 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES lai 
 
 on us is terrible if we don't tell you* 4 How shall they believe what 
 they haven't heard ? And how shall they hear if no one tells 'em ?' 
 St* Paul asked that 2,000 years ago, and, my word, it was a pretty 
 obvious question*" 
 
 44 Well, as I said, pulpit mush don't go down nowadays*" 
 
 44 Well, am / talking pulpit mush ? Am I ? I don't consider I 
 am* We've probably all got our mannerisms* No doubt I have* 
 You have, Mr* McCurdy, you know* And one of them," said I, 
 preparing myself, 44 is to slog your decrepit friends very violently 
 between the shoulders*" 
 
 He roared with laughter, and did it again* I knew he would* 
 But as I sat up suddenly, he caught his hand very hard on the 
 woodwork of the chair and said, 44 Damn*" Then I laughed* 
 
 44 Now look," said I* 44 The upshot of all this is, not that you 
 should gulp down all this talk and at once become a Catholic, but 
 you should resolve to know us and to give up hate * If you knew us, 
 you'd find us allies very well worth having, and perhaps even guides* 
 And any ally you can get, for the succouring of this unlucky world, 
 you ought to exult in getting* Hate divides; hate destroys; hate 
 falsifies all you look at; you can't see what you hate, straight ; and 
 it spoils the hater and tends to make the hated hate back, and that 
 spoils him* We can't afford to quarrel, nowadays, we who do 
 want to save the situation* It's an awful situation* You don't need 
 me to tell you so* Never was there such a mental instability — minds 
 that were stable, behaviour anyway that was fairly consistent, grown 
 rickety and toppling* All the world's received a shock; all its 
 framework was broken up, or it found, as in this country, that it 
 hadn't even got a framework* No real principles* Just ways of 
 carrying on; bad ways, often; good sometimes; but unprincipled 
 nearly always* Revolt against the bad is breeding anarchy; the 
 collapse of the good makes anarchy too* A slop; a mess* There 
 never was so much hysteria in the country as now* Or cynicism* 
 Or despair* There was sublimity during the war* It's been killed 
 off* And sentimentalism — a debauch of it — ids lasted, in the shape 
 of self-indulgence* We want the proclamation of principles; you 
 may be sure they'll be unpopular* Labour has some; the Church 
 has more* Labour's unpopular among those who have none; the 
 Church is unpopular with that part of Labour which has too few 
 and doesn't think out fully what it's got itself* So for God's sake 
 let's join hands whenever we can, and join issue whenever we must* 
 Then we may get somewhere* Meanwhile, Fd better be getting 
 
122 
 
 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 to the station, else I'll lose my last train and have to come back and 
 sleep under your counter." 
 
 44 An' you'd be welcome," said he, grinning. 44 Mind you, you 
 ain't converted me, an' I don't expect you think to 'ave done. But 
 I take your point, and I sure see there's two sides to every question. 
 An' I tell you I'll sure go to Hyde Park on a Sunday and hear them 
 lectures. But let 'em look for me to heckle ! An' when C. McCurdy 
 o' Belfast and London heckles, it's some heckling." 
 
 Oh," I said. " Belfast ? Well, I'm anyway London, too." 
 
 44 You are ?" he cried. 44 An' there's nowhere like the old village, 
 when all's said." 
 
 We said good-night, and between there and Paddington station I 
 managed to say the Stations of the Cross for Frank, climbing 
 assuredly a bitter Calvary, God alone knew where. I held my 
 Crucifix tightly in my pocket as I recited the Paters and the Aves, and 
 the indulgences rained cool upon the Souls in Purgatory. They 
 prayed for their fellow-sufferer, that his suffering might be as theirs, 
 cleansing, disentangling, sanctifying. 
 
Chapter XIII 
 
 N EXT day I felt I wanted to tell the Sergeant about this* I 
 didn't go straight to Barbara, to whose prayers for the 
 Corporal I always trusted especially, because she had been 
 looking so worried lately that I wanted to add nothing to the pressure 
 that might be on her* Mr* Travers had been ailing for a long time, 
 and the Sergeant had been transferred for quite three months from 
 Mrs* Bolton's to the Travers's house, so as to be handy if he were 
 needed* 
 
 So I went round to the Guild Offices after lunch, entered, and 
 said “ Oh," and stopped* 
 
 For there, in the window-embrasure, stood the Sergeant and Miss 
 Silver, holding hands* 
 
 Miss Silver gave a little squeal and then shivered with laughter* 
 The Sergeant looked scared out of his wits, turned brick red, and 
 then grinned slowly behind his hand* 
 
 44 It's evident," I said , 44 that I have to congratulate two very lucky 
 people*" 
 
 44 Miss Ernestine Silver," said the Sergeant (and I jumped with 
 delight* How could I have guessed she'd be called Ernestine ?), 
 44 Miss Ernestine Silver has very kindly consented to be my wife*" 
 44 And I do hope you'll forgive us," she implored* 44 I'd no 
 notion it was going to turn out like this when I started coming, I 
 really hadn't* I came most honestly to study your literature; and 
 I really did miss my train the first time, anyway ; and went on wanting 
 to read your literature, but I began to want — to want — Jack to 
 explain it to me, too " 
 
 44 An' I'm goin' to spend my life explaining it to you," said the 
 Sergeant, with high sentiment, and he kissed her and she once more 
 squealed* 
 
 My blood ran chill at the prospect of a life-time of lectures on 
 social economics, even from Jack Raikes, but I applauded the general 
 idea without reserve* 
 
 123 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 124 
 
 44 I've not been received into the Church yet " began Miss 
 
 Silver. 
 
 44 But it won't be long now/' interrupted he. 
 
 “ I hope not; and, of course, I couldn't think of its being done 
 anywhere but here " 
 
 4 * Nor by anyone save you, Father " 
 
 44 Oh, if you would ! Then both Jack and I will have been — oh, 
 it was meant ♦ I'm sure it was meant 1" 
 
 “ And it'll be him that marries us," he resumed. 
 
 “ And may the bull-dog come . . . ?" 
 
 44 An' Mrs. Bolton," he said, 44 will be the one that makes the 
 cake." I remained blinking under this bombardment, which con- 
 tinued for another ten minutes or so, and at last I said that I 
 thought it would be rather nice if I came back in an hour or two and 
 then we'd all go round and tell Mrs. Bolton, and then Miss Travers, 
 
 So at a quarter-to-four I returned, and there they were, sitting in 
 the window-seat, and what enquirers at the office had done mean- 
 while, Heaven knows. 
 
 We marched off, therefore, to Mrs. Bolton's, who held up hands 
 of amazement at the sight of Miss Silver, patted the Sergeant in a 
 motherly way, and then assumed an attitude of expectant resigna- 
 tion. 
 
 “ Mrs. Bolton," I said, 44 this is no ordinary visit. Important 
 events are occurring, and you are to be informed of them right 
 now. Not another soul is aware of what you are about to hear 
 save me." 
 
 44 There now," said Mrs. Bolton. 
 
 44 And two other persons whom you now see before you." 
 
 44 Indeed, your Reverence," said she. 
 
 44 An alliance has been concluded," I said, 44 between Miss 
 Ernestine Silver, your late lodger, and Mr* John Raikes, ex-sergeant, 
 your later lodger. In three words, they're getting married." 
 
 44 Lord forgive us l" cried Mrs. Bolton, somewhat cryptically, 
 " The lambs 1" She then fell upon Miss Silver and kissed her on 
 both cheeks and patted her hands, exclaiming, 44 The lambs," 44 the 
 poor ducks," 44 the lovey-doveys," and other adjurations of a zoo- 
 logical sort. 
 
 44 An' whether 'e'll 'ave it or whether 'e will not," she cried , 44 kiss 
 'im I will, as am old enough to be 'is grandmother, and proud would 
 I be to be so if the Almighty 'ad so ordained an' me not married 
 Bolton bein' no more than seventeen an' a mere girl — though look 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 125 
 
 it I may not, an’ never so much as met ’is grandfather to my know- 
 ledge*” 
 
 The Sergeant made no effort to disentangle these genealogical 
 subtleties, but submitted with a good grace, declaring that Mrs* 
 Bolton didn’t look older than an honest thirty, and if he’d not met 
 Miss Silver there’s no knowing what mightn’t have happened* 
 Whereupon Ernestine cried, 44 Oh, Jack /” and hit him with her 
 gloves, and he deserted Mrs* Bolton and kissed her * 
 
 44 An’ seein’ as Mr* Raikes,” continued the landlady , 44 has removed 
 to Mr* Travers’s house, nor do I blame him, though better cakes than 
 what I make not even that dear young lady could cook for him I will 
 say, and bless her angel fingers — seein’ as he’s no more here, what’s 
 to prevent his sweet young lady spendin’ part of her time afore the 
 marriage in her old room, with her poor old landlady for chaperong, 
 and them see one another often as they like an’ no ’arm said* There’s 
 a lodger there now, I will say,” she continued , 44 but a poor miserable 
 creature he is, an’ never so much as a 4 Fine mornin’, Mrs* Bolton,’ 
 nor a 4 How’s the indigestion to-day, Mrs* Bolton ?’ and go at the 
 end of the week ’e shall, no sooner do you say the word, you dearie 
 you 1” 
 
 44 And I must tell you, Mrs* Bolton,” I said, 44 that Miss Silver’s 
 never going to be naughty again, and if you hadn’t got a picture of 
 the Holy Father in her room, she’d go out and buy one for herself* 
 She’s decided to become a Catholic*” 
 
 44 That’s a dear, good girl,” cooed the old lady, 44 as is much too 
 pretty and too sensible not to know what’s right and proper when 
 she ’as the chance o’ seeing it* Look at the reverend Father ’imself*” 
 44 Well,” I said, 44 look at me if you like; I’m all that’s right and 
 
 proper, and I hope sensible, but ” 
 
 “ Oh don’t,” cried Miss Silver, relapsing, and she enfolded Mrs* 
 Bolton in her arms and said we must go and see Miss Travers* 
 
 44 And may all blessin’s follow you,” cried she, dabbing her eyes 
 with her apron, with extraordinary results, for her apron, like her 
 hands, was floury, 44 an’ give an old woman’s love to that beautiful 
 young angel an’ may she take example from the two of you an’ make 
 poor Captain Regin. ?d a ’appy man, for that Blake,” she said, aston- 
 ishingly, 44 is neither ’ere nor there* Let ’im seek elsewhere, for I 
 wishes ’im no ’arm, nor would I, but my Miss Barbara ’e shall not 
 ’ave, an’ so I tells ’im, or would, if ’e was to ask*” 
 
 So we got along to the Travers’s, and Barbara was alone* 
 
 When we entered the drawing-room panic descended on the two 
 
126 
 
 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 of them and they stepped behind me. I positively felt the Ser- 
 geant standing to attention, with his eyes above our heads, and I 
 expect Miss Silver clutched his sleeve, his fingers being inflexible. 
 
 44 Barbara/' I said, at once, 44 I present to you two happy people. 
 You've not met Miss Silver, I think, but she's often in these parts." 
 
 She shook hands charmingly with the girl, and then with the Ser- 
 geant. 
 
 44 Sergeant," she said (for they all called him that), 44 I'd noticed 
 you've been preoccupied for a long while past — now I see why !" 
 
 44 I trust, Miss," said he, in an army voice, 44 that my duty has been 
 in no way interfered with." 
 
 44 Indeed, no," she said. 44 We'll always be grateful to you for 
 your help. We've come to rely on you. But we shall have to give 
 you a holiday now !" 
 
 44 If I may make so bold, Miss Travers," said he, 44 and voicing 
 the sentiment, I'm sure, of my v/ife that is to be, I shall esteem it a 
 privilege to be allowed to continue any service I can be of, till the 
 last moment. And may that be distant." 
 
 44 The Sergeant," said 1, 44 told me on the way here that he hopes 
 to make his home in Wilchurch, so it's possible that he really may 
 be of assistance to you for a long while yet, whether in exactly the 
 same capacity or not quite, I don't know." 
 
 44 In any capacity, Father, I would be proud," said he, 44 to be of 
 service to Miss and Mr. Travers. And what I say, I've no doubt 
 but that Ernestine says with me." 
 
 After that we all had tea, and the two lambs then departed. 
 
 44 Isn't that too wonderful ?" said Barbara. 44 1 don't mean her 
 becoming a Catholic, exactly. But the whole idea 1" 
 
 44 It's great," I said. 44 And it shows what a really excellent girl 
 she is, and how really simple. Because after all, it's not what you'd 
 have expected for her. To start with she was as absurd as any of 
 'em, and as undemocratic as you make 'em, as these dilettantes 
 all of 'em are; she'd have turned up her nose at the real man of the 
 people. And now she goes and marries him ! They've talked it all 
 out, they say, and their ways and means, and she's been learning up 
 housekeeping — oh, and keeping accounts — and he's explained she'll 
 really have to work, and she realizes it all right, and she's willing." 
 
 44 All the same," Barbara said, 44 I shouldn't wonder if he'll earn 
 a good salary some day, especially if he improves at the pace he's 
 going at. And with his pension, and a little newspaper work on 
 her part, they'll get along. Oh ! we'll have her for the C.W.L." 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 127 
 
 44 I love/' said I, 44 to see this mating of idealism and common 
 sense ! Miss Silver and the Sergeant, converts, and as keen as 
 mustard in different ways — absolutely no side , now, about either 
 of 'em 1" 
 
 We paused; all this talk had been a little too deliberate. I knew 
 she wanted to say something else. At last she said, 44 Father," and 
 waited. 
 
 44 Yes ?" 
 
 44 Father, I don't think Daddy can live very long now. Then 
 what am I to do ?" 
 
 44 Lady Sophia would look after you," I said, for the sake of saying 
 something* 
 
 44 Yes, but that wouldn't do at all. No, Father, I've always 
 thought I wanted to be a nun. And since Dicky was killed. I'm sure. 
 But I wouldn't think about it while Daddy needed me. But now 
 I feel dreadful about it. * ♦ ♦" 
 
 She broke off. 
 
 I was thinking of so many things that I couldn't speak for a few 
 moments. 
 
 44 Help me a little," she said. 
 
 44 It's not that you doubt your vocation, I think ?" 
 
 44 No; I'm sure/ 9 
 
 44 Nor that you can't tell what order or congregation to join ?" 
 
 44 No. The Poor Clares," she said, speaking very low. That, I 
 confess, I had not at all foreseen. However, I left it, and said: 
 
 44 Well, Barbara dear, there's no one living who has the right to 
 prevent you." 
 
 44 And I don't mean Reggie," she said, looking up and smiling. 
 
 44 Then I think you mean Geoffrey Blake," I said, smiling too. 
 
 Her smile died right out, and she looked drawn and unhappy. 
 
 44 It's more dreadful than you think. Reggie's such a Catholic 
 that he'll understand. I can trust him. But Captain Blake isn't 
 even a Catholic yet. If I go, will he become one ? And if I wait 
 till he does, and then go, what will become of him ? I'm not vain, 
 Father. I'm not really, but I am mixed up in his conversion; how 
 can I doubt it ? And I can't tell him or anyone but you, as a 
 priest, who's a friend, too, that I'm determined to; and if I let 
 him linger on and on, so to say, and be converted, and then go — 
 well, how can I ?" she said, flushing. 
 
 44 Oh, Barbara, you don't want me to tell them, or to let them 
 know sort of casually, that you're thinking of it ? 
 
128 
 
 MR, FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 44 It would be cruel to ask you. But everything seems cruel just 
 now/' She paused again, ♦ , ♦ 44 And even as it is,” she said, her 
 voice going up a little, but she had wonderful control, ** don't you 
 see that it looks as if I'd been leading him on — I haven't, but a girl 
 can't help feeling — oh, you can't guess what she must feel if a man 
 thinks that of her — or even playing them off one against the other 
 — being nice — I had to be nice, Father, hadn't I ? And I've never 
 once flirted, ♦ ♦ 
 
 44 I couldn't imagine you flirting, Barbara,'' 
 
 “ No, but they could perhaps. Or Captain Blake — won't he 
 think I've merely been netting him for the Church ? I couldn't 
 bear it. Oh, why can't everyone be Catholics and see things from 
 the inside ? He'd know, then, I couldn't have,'' 
 
 44 I think Reggie'd see him through it, Barbara, He has a cult 
 for Reggie, And he's understood the idea of sacrifice. He's seen 
 examples , ♦ , and of loyalty, , , ♦ He'll not suspect you. They'll 
 both suffer; but they'll have one another's friendship. It'll draw 
 them together, I think. It may — finish Blake's transformation,” 
 She sighed. After a pause she said: 
 
 44 D'you think I'm right about the Poor Clares ?” 
 
 “ It's a new idea to me. I'd have to get my thoughts rearranged,” 
 “ Life has been so very complicated,” she said, 44 I feel I need 
 a great simplification,” 
 
 I couldn't help smiling, 
 
 44 The Poor Clares certainly would provide one !” I said, 44 But 
 you're young, Barbara, You mayn't always feel life's quite so 
 muddled. The Poor Clares would be for all the rest of your exist- 
 ence, , ♦ ," 
 
 44 1 feel very old,” she said, and as she sat like that, with her 
 delicate profile to me, she might have been almost any age, so ex- 
 perienced and calm was her look, albeit the late afternoon made her 
 hair glow like the pheasant's feathers Jock had compared it to, 
 44 Since Dicky died, I feel that — well — that I've lived that part of 
 my life, if it doesn't sound priggish to say so,” 
 
 “ But, seriously, doesn't Lady Sophia want you to live with her ?” 
 44 Yes, she does. But — I don't want to live in a castle — nor 
 Curzon Street, I'd be all wrong there, I don't want that sort of 
 society life, and Linborough is a perfect wilderness, and I couldn't 
 even do C,W,L, there,” 
 
 44 Don't you think she might need you ? She is very old. It 
 would still be sacrifice, Barbara, First for your father, and then 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 129 
 
 for her* No one could call it selfish* And it doesn't really matter 
 whether you wear satin shoes or go barefoot*" 
 
 44 If she needed me. I'd go* And the only human thing that could 
 keep me out of the Poor Clares would be the cold 1" 
 
 44 Perhaps you might do both* She can't live very long*" 
 
 44 Isn't life strange ? From death to death* Dicky; then Daddy, 
 Aunt Sophia — we'd be waiting for them* Counting on them almost* 
 One feels so unreal; somehow, I hardly feel I'm me* One's life 
 
 depending on deaths " 
 
 44 Ego sum resurrectio et vita " 
 
 44 Oh 1" she cried, suddenly animated* 44 I want to pray ! I 
 want the Divine Office ! I want to offer myself ! Every now and 
 then sacrifice seems so everything , that I don't mind those two poor 
 boys suffering — oh. Father ! Don't say I shall have to sacrifice 
 my sacrifice and marry one of them !" 
 
 “ My dear Barbara, we're becoming almost ridiculous," I said* 
 44 I'll say Mass that God may clear up our minds, and you pray for 
 the Corporal* I don't know where he is* I'm sure he's in trouble* 
 I must find him — so pray hard*" 
 
 9 
 
Chapter XIV 
 
 I THOUGHT our prayers were answered when about the 
 beginning of September I received a letter from the Cor- 
 poral* 
 
 “Reverend Father and True Friend: Re St* Edith's Fair com- 
 mencing Monday sixth and finishing Tuesday io o'clock I shall be 
 there Father* Look out for Gorgeous Glancing Gondolas, that's 
 us, some Gondolas you bet when they glances they leaves your 
 stummack hanging on the off horn of the moon it's Truth I'm 
 telling you* Well Father Here's the best of luck and I'll be round 
 sure thing Sunday night we camping at Wilford Bridge ard by I 
 have a lot to tell you you bet Father* Now Father dont you be 
 away I want to see you I tell you I do for sure* Wishing you all the 
 best old friend your sincere friend Francis Newnes* P*S* talk 
 of the frying pan an fire what else is life so you be there Father mind, 
 your old pal if you'll still ave me Frank*" 
 
 I wrote hastily to say I'd be away till late on Sunday, but that I'd 
 come out to see them putting up the Fair on the Monday morning. 
 He answered by a card saying that he'd light a red flare at 5*45 
 prompt, so that I'd see where he was* 
 
 On Saturday night the heavy engines were deposited in St* 
 Edith's, the broad street on to which our house looks. As usual, 
 the heaviest were placed on our side, and exactly opposite our 
 windows* On Sunday they plotted out the areas each show might 
 occupy, and at exactly 5 a*m* on Monday the Fair began to arrive* 
 I got up and went out, never tiring of the extraordinary spectacle* 
 The poor sky didn't want to be woken up yet, and at first showed 
 a dead sort of light, that was no light, and was outraged by the 
 flaring orange-coloured naphthas, and the incandescent, violet by 
 contrast; gradually the wan dawn increased, very austere and cold 
 behind the flares* Enormous vans serpentined to and fro, backing 
 with extreme delicacy, each into its own place* I wondered how on 
 earth all this was done when it was managed by the help of scores 
 of horses* Already the central parts of the merry-go-rounds were 
 
 130 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 131 
 
 in place , huge funnels on the top of each of which a serene youth 
 always sat, smoking a cigarette* I never saw him get there, and 
 how he did it I never knew* But there he sat, catching with aston- 
 ishing accuracy the long iron rods that should support the awning, 
 riveting them, fitting them into the gigantic spokes from which the 
 cars were to hang, and which grew out skeleton-wise, with great 
 rapidity, all round the shaft* Underneath, men were handling with 
 a terrifying impassivity dragons, swans, and mermaids, at which 
 quite a large crowd already gaped* I thought it was really time I 
 lent a hand, for I had ended by feeling indignant at the aloof atti- 
 tude of the onlookers* It is true that at the corner where the show- 
 vans came in procession into St* Edith's, the crowd made awestruck 
 comments* 44 She'll be in there” they all said, when the vehicle 
 painted with the image of the Fat Lady arrived* But round the 
 places where the actual work was being done it would have required 
 a pickaxe to penetrate the apathy of the contemplative male* So 
 amid the general disapproval I assisted elderly ladies in velvet coats 
 to upheave all sorts of beams, trestles, and rails, and got, no doubt, 
 very badly in their way* However, they professed gratitude, and 
 I consider I built a large portion of that Fair* It was odd, I re- 
 flected, how ugly the majority of the show-ladies were, and how lean 
 and good-looking the men* Men who have to do with horses or 
 ships, clerics, judges, and actors develop a special sort of face and, 
 in particular, of mouth; so did these men; they were lean, cynical, 
 alert, yet tired; with sharp eyes, and lips melancholy, though con- 
 trolled* * * * I liked the type; I was sure we should be friends (I 
 exclude a beastly Professor claiming to be from a fashionable studio 
 in Montmartre, and some soul-less voluble cheap-jacks; but these 
 hadn't yet come to the surface); and good temper was already 
 noticeable* When an on-looking lady got in the way, and a world- 
 weary youth roared at her, 44 Now 'op it, mother, else yer feet'll be 
 as flat as wot yer face is, an' that's pancakes," she would merely say, 
 admiringly, "Well, ain't 'e the one for sauce!" and stay exactly 
 where she was till he kissed her into rout* 
 
 But a sudden crimson glare shot upwards a hundred yards away* 
 It was the Corporal* Advancing timidly in the wake of one of the 
 groups of alarmingly competent young girls, who alone lent a squeal- 
 ing vivacity to the rather grim scene, I at length found a gigantic struc- 
 ture between Lieutenant Smith's Amusements (I was longing to find 
 out what they were; poor man, he looked as if he needed them) and 
 The Original Oriental Orgies , Harem Houris and Omar's Odalisques ♦ 
 
MR, FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 132 
 
 And there, at an incredible height, perched on the slender funnel, 
 sat Francis Newnes, 
 
 44 What-oh, Far-ther,” shrieked he, 
 
 A vast crowd instantly began to collect, 
 
 44 Come down, Frank,” I shouted, in terror of this publicity, 
 
 44 'E calls 'im Frank !” murmured the crowd, and I at once went 
 up in their estimation, 
 
 Frank slung himself down by the web of iron rods; but since he'd 
 got up there to put them up, I still was at a loss to guess how he'd 
 reached his perch. He was in trousers, tennis shoes, and sweater, 
 and looked haggard. However, he shook my hand till my wrist 
 felt dislocated, 
 
 44 Knew you'd come,” he cried — 44 knew you would !” 
 
 44 Of course. But couldn't we get somewhere private ?” 
 
 He gazed round, 
 
 44 Inside of the ingin,” said he, 
 
 I crawled after him into the bowels of the merry-go-round, and 
 we sat down on some very oily machinery, over which he'd spread 
 a rag. He went on repeating that he'd known I'd come, and asking 
 how I was, 
 
 44 I'd no idea you'd taken on this job, Frank,” 
 
 44 Didn't meself till a month ago. The old boy wot owned it, 
 crocked; and wishful to do me a good turn, me 'avin' invented the 
 Glance, 'e 'anded it over to me on an understandin'. You ain't 
 never seen it ?” 
 
 44 The Glance ? The Gondolas ? What d'you mean ?” 
 
 44 The Gondolas,” he corrected me, 44 Triple motion. They 
 rotates, same as any; an' they rocks; an' they glances, I mean they 
 whizzes round, rockin' like as the gondolas do, an' then the whole 
 business it suddenly slips back like with a most 'orrible jerk, leavin' 
 your innards somewheres three feet in front of you, I invented 
 that there glance, along of wot you told me they done to you once 
 when you was flyin'. Glide up an' up quiet, and then, whpp 1 back 
 yer goes sudden, you know. Some strain on the machinery, but 
 most delish for the public. Fair loves it. But you 'ave free rides 
 all the time, if so be you likes to. Free for you every time an' all 
 the time, if so be , , ,” 
 
 44 But Frank, I'll be wheeling about spinal carriages all day. I 
 shan't be able to leave them, to have rides, I'm afraid,” 
 
 44 As you please,” said he, 44 Here's me, here's the gondolas 
 complete with Glance, and here's you,” 
 
133 
 
 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 44 Are you running this show by yourself ?" 
 
 44 Along with the Oriental Orgies/' he said, curtly. 
 
 44 Well, anyway, if I take a 'bus, and start back from the hospital 
 at io, I can be here about 10.45, and you and me'll have our yarn, 
 won't we ? We can manage somewhere, I expect. You all shut 
 down at io.o ?" 
 
 44 Oh yes; we'll have our yarn," said he, rather moodily. 
 
 Then we separated. 
 
 I arrived at the hospital at two, and collected a lad called Thomas 
 Carter, who had been on a farm near Hanton before the war, and 
 was now awaiting his twenty-third operation on his spine; he was 
 still sheathed in plaster, and had lain in the same position for three 
 years, now. However, he could wave his arms about, and you 
 could prop his head up a little. We reached the Fair about three 
 o'clock. 
 
 A church, broadways on, blocked the entrance to the wide street 
 — it was quite fifty yards wide, I should say — and only after turning 
 its apse did the full glory of the spectacle burst upon you. The 
 uproar of the merry-go-rounds was such that all the music fused, and 
 only when you were actually beside one, could you distinguish its 
 tune. The Gondolas, as we passed — the Glance was terrific — were 
 playing Rachmaninoff's Prelude in rag-time. Taken at a brisk 
 pace, it sounded quite remarkable. The Corporal was nothing if 
 not up to date. He also had the Ride of the Valkyries in his reper- 
 toire, and plenty of Barcarolles, also 44 ragged." 
 
 We moved slowly down the Fair, which took us a good half-hour, 
 for the crowds were already dense under a blazing sun. Ice-cream 
 stalls; photographers; rifle-ranges; coker-nut shies, and merry-go- 
 rounds. Fortune-tellers, too, but we waited till later to sample 
 them. Likewise the side-shows. 
 
 Having reached the extreme end of the Fair, we returned, and 
 inspected the Mysterious Mole, the Gruesome Girl from Grin- 
 stead (she was a head, no more, floating in mid-air within a box, an 
 illusion which I refrained from explaining to Carter till teatime, 
 when I considered he had gloated over her gruesomeness sufficiently)/ 
 the Fat Ladies (his comments were unprintable), and a good deal 
 more of the same sort. Already the good nature of the Fair-people 
 was manifest. No showman or show-woman would dream of letting 
 me pay for the wounded boy, nor even for myself; actually, they 
 once or twice uprooted poles, and upheld sagging tents to let the 
 chair through an else too narrow aperture. And the crowds parted 
 
134 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 without a murmur till I could wheel him right down to the front, 
 and enjoy to the full at once the spectacle and the decisive perfumes 
 of moles, seals, cowboy leather or patchouli, as the case might be* 
 Carter took the performances with placidity, but interiorly he was 
 enjoying himself immensely* Once or twice, confronted by such 
 mild improprieties as the Fair allowed itself, he murmured : 44 Silly, 
 I call it,” and once, “ Childish*” Once, too, when I explained why 
 we'd cut out the Professor, he austerely began : 44 Them things didn't 
 ought to be allowed* Now, when I was in France * * ♦” All the 
 way to The Last Hope , where we now adjourned for tea, he kept up 
 an account of his experiences over there, but I couldn't listen to him, 
 as the job of steering the chair through the ever-increasing crowd 
 absorbed my attention, and the angry music all round us drowned 
 half of what he said* 
 
 But when we turned off into the High Street he was observing: 
 44 But you mustn't say too much to them, when all's said an' done, 
 seein' as human nature's human nature, an' works itself out regular, 
 no matter what a man's opinions is*'' 
 
 44 Opinions can help a lot,'' said I* “ But you've got to have 'em 
 And to have opinions which apply all the time and every time and 
 don't cease to be true on Armistice night or Fair night*'' 
 
 44 There's few opinions like that,'' said he* 
 
 But we turned off into the courtyard of the Last Hope ♦ I often 
 took wheeled chairs in there, because it was difficult to heave them 
 into proper tea-shops, and, anyhow, the men preferred it* How- 
 ever, since it was not much past four, and supper wasn't to be 
 till six, and Carter said he felt that he could fancy a ham 
 sandwich, I bought him eight at the little meat shop next door, and 
 he ate all of them* Meanwhile, I explained to him the illusion of 
 the Gruesome Girl, and this, with the ham sandwiches and a glass 
 of beer, made him thoughtful* I let my mind rest, in this old- 
 fashioned courtyard, with its plaster walls tinted a warm apricot 
 between dark oak; its Virginia creeper already turning every fiery 
 tint, its evergreens in barrels, its gallery* It pleased me; and the 
 westering sun began to fill it with calm splendour* The angry music 
 of the Fair seemed whole leagues away* 
 
 Meanwhile, Ethel, who brought him his beer and me my cup of 
 tea, made a discovery* 
 
 44 How funny,'' she exclaimed, “ but I seem to know your face*'' 
 She always said this; but now she was looking at Carter as if she 
 meant it. 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 135 
 
 “ Name of Thomas Carter/' said he* 44 Farm 'and at Cotton's 
 by Hanton, previous to the war*" 
 
 “ There now !" said she , 44 ain't that funny ? And me at Hanton 
 too, ever since I was a little one*" 
 
 They sparred for a long time, till he marked her down as Ethel 
 Bennett from Perrin and Peach's, haberdashers* He used to bring 
 in eggs* At every pause, and there were many, she murmured, 
 44 Well, now, isn't that funny !" and he replied with, 44 Queer, ain't 
 it ?" This went on for twenty minutes, while I watched the sun- 
 light* 
 
 At last he said, without any preliminary skirmish: 44 An' what 
 about young Arthur Sparks, 'im as you was walkin' out with ?" 
 
 44 He chucked me for Liza. Nobblet," she returned, with equal 
 serenity, 44 her what served at Edston's*" Then she turned to me* 
 44 Walkin' out with him a matter of eight year, I was, an' on his first 
 leave he chucks me for another* Tried to hide it, he did, an' keep 
 the two on us dangling like, one on each little finger* But she f ad 
 to crow over me, had Liza, it bein' thought none would be wishful 
 for 'er, what with her figure an' then her ways being known*" 
 
 44 That was hard on you," I said* 
 
 Little tired wrinkles showed suddenly all round her eyes, but else 
 she remained placid* 
 
 44 She won't be thinkin' so much of 'im now," said she, 44 he 
 havin' got his what-for, an' one side of his face shot away cruel, an' 
 him being out of khaki an' started a moustache again to hide it, but 
 lazy-like, him not carin' much about life no more an' leaves it ragged*" 
 
 44 Married, was they ?" he asked* 
 
 44 An' quick, too* Funny, isn't it ? Walkin' out for eight years, 
 an' me not so much as lookin' at another, nor yet wouldn't do, an' 
 writin' to 'im regular an' send in' him this an' that when I had a 
 shillin' here an' a sixpence there; an' then, married in a fortnight* 
 Well, I suppose it's natural, she makin' a dead set at him an' me gone 
 off a bit through workin' real hard* Funny, ain't it ? Come natural 
 to him, I reckon, an' didn't think twice about it* I don't wish him 
 no ill luck* 'E don't want more than he's got, not with Liza Nobblet 
 what was* But say, kid, ain't it funny, me meetin' you ? Tell us 
 about yourself, boy* You was married, too, wasn't you ?" 
 
 44 Ah," he said* 44 An' two kiddies as is now with me sister-in- 
 law* Did the dirty on me, she did, and off with a Canadian Ser- 
 geant, through 'er not 'avin' no more use for me like this, an' my 
 divorce is goin' through this very minute, tho' it's none so easy. 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 136 
 
 'im 'avin' left 'er or she ' im , an" livin' with another. Decent chap, 
 too, by all accounts/' 
 
 44 Pore kid," said she. 44 Wish you may get it soon. There's a 
 tidy few as wants 'em nowadays, but the half of 'em don't bother. 
 Arrange it between 'em; 'im an' 'er; and 'er an' 'im; keep your name 
 an' no money spent; or just swops. Funny, ain't it ? I don't hold 
 with it meself, havin' been brought up different, nor ever did, nor 
 will." 
 
 44 We none of us ain't had much bringin' up," said he. 44 Least- 
 ways, it ain't schooling as teaches us them things, aye or nay. It's 
 conscience as does it, an' some 'ave one an' some you'd reckon 
 'aven't. And yet, again, there's plenty as *as consciences what does 
 it, and sorry enough they are when they wakes up to it." 
 
 After this we went back to the Fair. As we passed the Gondolas 
 (which were playing Grieg's Death of Ase, arranged as a waltz), I 
 observed the Corporal standing on the little platform under the 
 electric orchestra. Cymbals palpitated around him, drums rattled 
 to invisible sticks; angels, negresses, harlequins, and gondoliers, all 
 heavily gilded, jerked their arms and necks mechanically around the 
 central portrait of Edward VII* and Queen Alexandra, above whom 
 clusters of electric lights already had begun to blaze. But the sunset 
 flashed back from myriads of little mirrors, flaring fiercely as the vast 
 machine gathered pace, roared as it rotated, and then jerked hideously 
 backwards to the accompaniment of shrieks. The Corporal, very 
 horsey, glistening gaiters, immense pale check riding-breeches, 
 waisted coat with flaps, stock, and a bowler hat at an angle, had put 
 the differentiating touch to his costume by means of a crimson sash 
 He was shouting rather brutally at the crowd, timid, it would seem, 
 of the 44 Glance," and ridiculing their reluctance. He didn't see us, 
 and we turned back a step or two to see Lieutenant Smith's Amuse- 
 ments, which turned out to be twisted mirrors, and a few wax heads, 
 representing Miss Flossie Foljambe, the Morphia Maniac, and 
 some obscure murderesses; there was, too, a peep-show into which 
 Tom Carter couldn't raise himself to peer. 44 Childish," he'd have 
 called it. 
 
 We then decided to finish up with the Oriental Orgy. The tent 
 was stifling, and we had to wait. Two elderly ladies, of a type 
 which the Fair showed frequently, noticed me, and at once began 
 they too. to put the Differentiating Touch. ... 44 Of course, I 
 
 don't really go to these places, dear," said the elder ; 44 but then one 
 always learns something , and on a day like this I thought one really 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 137 
 
 ought to !° 44 Oh, yes, dear; 0 she replied, 44 because * * *" But 
 both remained silent, at a loss to find a motive for this duty* 
 
 44 Jest to see how the pore dear common folks amuses of them- 
 selves, 0 said Carter, so unexpectedly that I jumped* But a curtain 
 drew aside, and there was the Oriental Orgy, sitting on a sort of tripod 
 wreathed in snakes, of which the smaller ones were undoubtedly alive* 
 0 I am the only genuine Oriental Orgy, ladies and gentlemen, 0 
 she announced, in a mincing voice, most unsuited to her stalwart 
 proportions* 0 This snake is, as you see, a cobra, and is the iden- 
 tical species used by the magicians when confronting Moses, and 
 as worn by the Royal 'Ouse of the ancient Egyptians* It was also 
 used by Cleopatra when angered by her defeat by Julius Caesar, as 
 told by Shakespeare* ♦ ♦ *° 
 
 But I was distracted by the two ladies' alarm, which was genuine, 
 and caused one of them to grip me by the collar and then to apologize, 
 and by their fictitious disapproval of the Orgy's attire* At least it 
 didn't prevent their stopping there* But, more than all else, the 
 sudden apparition of the Corporal amazed me; he stood on the 
 further side of the tent, watching the Orgy with a scowl* She had 
 descended from her perch, and was languorously dancing to the 
 thudding of a drum and the clamour of Indian Love Lyrics from a 
 gramophone ; incense curled, but when I looked round, after a blaze 
 of pink fire had made me blink, the Corporal was gone* A series 
 of tableaux followed, in which the Orgy reclined on cushions, backed 
 by a painting, first of the Pyramids, then of the Taj-Mahal, and 
 finally, New York as seen from a roof garden* Such, I could only 
 suppose, was the track of her career of guilty splendour* Finally, 
 with a view of minarets and domes to inspire her, a sort of Omar, 
 who'd decided by now that any wilderness would be happier without 
 her, stood behind her with a scimitar* The light changed to green, 
 and she was seen lying, with plenty of blood about, while a sort of 
 giant bat flapped gauzy wings above her* It was quite horrid enough, 
 and the two ladies went away more self-satisfied than ever* Such 
 never should be their history* * * * 
 
 Outside, I met a large South African sailor of my acquaintance, 
 and we all went home to supper, as it was quite half-past six* They 
 ate cold mutton, cucumber, tomatoes, cress, bread and cheese, and 
 drank tea; and behaved with a petrifying politeness* It was the 
 dining-room which overawed them, and the superfluity of cutlery, 
 and the foolishly small cups* However, they ate with appetite* 
 
 At 7*30 we sallied forth once more, and the South African took 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 138 
 
 charge of the carriage* Our progress waxed tumultuous* He 
 whistled like a steam engine, and the carriage became a tank which 
 hurled the crowd right and left, relentlessly* In fact, all my time 
 was henceforward occupied in steadying the situation* A long 
 column formed itself behind us, of persons who found that thus at 
 last they could move with sufficient speed through the packed 
 throng* Truculent small boys accompanied us, yelling; hundreds 
 of people must have been bruised black and blue by our impact — 
 for it was a rule of the Fair that you should advance with a crab- 
 like motion, sidling along and looking anywhere save before you* 
 But still, tempers were perfect, even when white shoes and stockings 
 were blackened by our wheels; everyone tickled Carter with their 
 whisks; he retaliated; powder flew about; Providence arranged that 
 none fell on myself* The truculence of small boys; the insolence of 
 fourteen-year-olds; the elegance of youths; the seething hordes of 
 girls; the impermeability of middle age, all were alike defeated by 
 the South African* Admirably he adapted himself to each category; 
 the truculent infants adored his bluff, obliterative methods; the 
 rowdies became green with fright when he turned on them with 
 snarl and snap and roar; he took the elegants into his confidence; 
 he leered the girls into squealing ecstasy; his Sirs and Ma'ams en- 
 deared him to pyramidical respectability* Throughout, his tact, his 
 temper, his care for Carter, his thoughtfulness for me, were exquisite; 
 and towards half-past nine I despatched him to finish the day on 
 his own* With a wild whoop he disappeared* 
 
 Suddenly, too, disappeared the violent glare; silenced, the angry 
 uproar of the music, the hoarse braying of the throng, as we turned 
 into a side-street of old Wilchurch, on our way home* For a while 
 the cathedral towers stood up, black this side, red that, a dusky 
 sinister red, where the Fair shone against them* But them we 
 passed; and between old gabled houses, with only here and there a 
 yellow square or red of lamp-light in their blackness, we went down 
 to the East Bridge* You could just hear the swirl of the water 
 between the arches ; the river poured forward from a tunnel of trees, 
 and on between wide meadows where faint mist lay* An enormous 
 sky spread over us, moonless, but full of stars* 
 
 Afterwards the road, too, passed beneath trees, and in the darkness 
 he asked me if I'd enjoyed myself* I judged by his voice that I'd 
 not spoil his day for him if I answered , 44 So so*" 
 
 44 Thought as much," said he* “ You'll be a bit tired, anyway* 
 But you'll soon be seeing your friend*" 
 
MR, FRANCIS NEWNES 139 
 
 44 Well/' I said, 44 the thought of him isn't adding to my enjoyment 
 at this moment," 
 
 44 No ?" he asked, 44 Reckoned you was worrying about what 
 we was saying durin' tea," 
 
 44 It depressed me/' I said. 
 
 44 I'm glad you knows about me an' my trouble/' he said, in a 
 humble sort of voice. He was feeling himself not much of a man 
 in the world, just then; a broken man, with a wife who'd reckoned 
 him not worth her loyalty, 44 No one else in the hospital knows on 
 it," he said, 44 Ethel Bennett, she had to be told, seein' she'll be 
 writin' to Hanton about meetin' me. Queer, ain't it, runn in' up 
 against her ?" 
 
 44 Well, Tom, if you like to count me a friend, do. We've 
 scarcely met except to-day; but I expect you feel a bit lonely in 
 hospital at times, and it's pleasant to have something reliable." 
 
 44 Lonely 1" he said. 44 Reliable. . . 
 
 There was a long silence, 
 
 44 Reckon there'd be nothing wrong in me marryin' Ethel Bennett 
 when I'm well, if she'll have me ?" he said suddenly. 
 
 I felt very desperate, I didn't know how to start, 
 
 44 Listen," I said, at last, 44 It'll be a long time before you're 
 well enough to think of marrying Ethel, or anyone else. However 
 much you occupy yourself with dreams of doing so, and of a home 
 and a future, you'll be bound to go through hours of pain and 
 despondency when you'll be the worse for your dreams. Couldn't 
 you occupy yourself entirely with doing good turns right now, giving 
 a good time to the lads as far as you can manage it, and leave the 
 future to take care of itself ? Perhaps one never gets much out of 
 life except chances of serving." 
 
 44 I bin selfish during the war," he said, 44 I thought of nothing 
 save the good time I'd have in me home when I returned. I was 
 seein' meself all the while, comfortable, and in me little nest; an' 
 now look at me." 
 
 44 Tom," said 1 , 44 I'll risk saying it wasn't all selfish. You didn't 
 just expect that your wife would live as she should, and keep things 
 warm for you, and, meanwhile, do just as you pleased yourself ?" 
 
 44 Never once," said he, trying to look round. 44 I ain't bin no 
 saint; but never once since me marriage. Always turned me 
 thoughts away to me 'ome and me wife an' kiddies. And now 
 look 1" 
 
 44 Never regret it ! Never slack off in your mind ♦ You had a 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 140 
 
 splendid principle there* You believed in your obligation* And 
 also that God was approving of it, Tom ♦ * ♦ ?" 
 
 44 How shouldn't He ? Reckon God prefers 'em straight* But 
 I don't suppose 'E'd mind, or, anyways, Christ wouldn't, if I 
 married Ethel Bennett*" 
 
 " Well, wish to do only what They'd approve*" 
 
 44 I wish I was a kiddie again," said he* 44 Very happy 'twas* 
 Queer, life; ain't it ?" 
 
 But the indescribably solemn space of starlit night was over, and 
 the fragrance and the silence* 
 
 The long lines of hospital lights twinkled in the distance, and in 
 a few minutes we had turned down the asphalt path and entered the 
 long, pale corridor* Carter's excitement bubbled up, now, within 
 him; the carriage advanced into the ward, he all powdery, waving 
 his whisk, and exclaiming that he'd had the time of his life* Kindly 
 eyes twinkled at him from all round the room, flooded with the hard 
 electric light; cheers and chaff greeted him; one or two other men 
 had gone down; all had had their fortunes told; all took them with 
 utmost seriousness, somewhat disturbed to find that the flattering 
 44 You can be Led, but not Driven " had been said to each, and to 
 each that he was 44 passionately fond of music*" To all had been 
 promised health and wealth* All, once more, were flattered to find 
 that they were Rather Wild, but Loyal to their Friends* * * * 
 
 I left them discussing it, ran for my 'bus, and rattled down to 
 Wilchurch* 
 
 The Corporal was standing in the door of his van, behind the 
 roundabout* He was once more in breeches and shirt, and didn't 
 remove his pipe, nor smile, when he saw me* He just nodded* 
 
 44 Tired ?" said I, climbing the little ladder* 
 
 But I was amazed at the interior of the van* It was small, of 
 course, and even so comprised two cabins, so to say, at each end, 
 leaving a tiny square room in the middle* But the furniture of it ! 
 The sheer luxury ! Let alone the miniature range, the dresser, and 
 the lockers — the sheer ornamentation ! Lamp brackets, with 
 dangling glass pendants, projected on each side of a dummy mantel- 
 piece; silver cups — won Heaven knows by whom, possibly by the 
 Corporal himself, in the days of army sports; possibly, I was ready 
 to surmise, by the Gondolas or even the van* A gramophone; a 
 canary; sheaves of calico flowers, looking-glasses everywhere, every- 
 where, everywhere photographs — the Corporal, Kitchener, the King; 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 141 
 
 Carpentier, lots of ladies, and, disconcerting touch ! myself, black 
 and cassocked. 
 
 44 Frank/" I cried, 44 what a magpie you are ! I thought you"d 
 given up all this sort of thing since you came out of hospital/" 
 
 44 "Ave to feel homey, ain"t I ?"" said he, gruffly, and dropped the 
 subject. I"d thought he"d have been pleased, and I felt snubbed. 
 
 A man covered with black oil and an even grimier boy were sitting 
 at a table on which mysterious dishes, chiefly of tinned food, reposed 
 among stout-bottles. 
 
 Frank introduced me as the reverend gent wot done the kindly 
 to him in "ospital, and they extended friendly hands. They were 
 Frank"s satellites, and worked the roundabout. 
 
 44 Mr* Newnes says as "ow you wouldn"t be above sharin" a bit o' 
 somethin","" said the man. “ But I warns you it ain"t gentlemen"s 
 food."" 
 
 44 He eats,"" said Frank, grimly, “ hanythink."" 
 
 44 What I want is a drink,"" said I. “ I"m done in after that spinal 
 carriage and I can"t eat much, Frank; but I"m sure you can make 
 some tea ?"" 
 
 “ Huh !"" said he. “ Wot"s comin" to you ? Tea ? Time 
 was . . . "" 
 
 44 Possibly,"" said I, “ but, Mr. Beeton, don"t you agree that there "s 
 nothing so quenching to a thirst as tea when you"re hot and tired ?" r 
 
 “ There"s them as will "ave it so,"" he answered, glumly, and 
 instantly shoved the boy very hard with his elbow. For that youth 
 had suddenly grinned very wide, and ejaculated: 
 
 44 "Ow should "e know ?"" 
 
 On being shoved, he said, “ "Ere !"" but nothing else whatsoever 
 the entire evening. 
 
 However, I afterwards devoured two sausages and drank about 
 eight cups of tea. 
 
 “ Done good business ?"" I asked. 
 
 “ Reckon this Fair ain"t wot it was. Comes here reg"lar, don"t 
 it ?"" he asked. 
 
 44 Nobody knows how many hundreds of years. Before even I 
 was born, Frank."" For I was feeling millions of years old, just 
 then, and everything seemed to have been happening over and 
 over again in exactly the same way, and as though it always would. 
 
 I tried to tell myself this was just fatigue, but the impression came 
 from within the little room. . . . 
 
 44 But this old town ain"t that old ? This street ain"t, anyways."" 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 142 
 
 “ No* But the tower of the church at this end is 900 years old, 
 and that's not bad; and there was a church where the one at the 
 other end is now, ages before that one was built, and it dates from 
 the Middle Ages* All between was a field till a hundred years since, 
 and that's where the fairs settled*" 
 
 44 Queer to think on," said he, rather depressed* 
 
 44 And for hundreds of years at least, much the same amusements 
 — roundabouts, anyway; pulled round by a couple of cart horses; 
 before steam, you know* And a fiddle for the music* And swings, 
 and coker-nut shies, and rifle ranges — you potted at Napoleon or — 
 well, whoever was the villain of the moment; and lots of fighting- 
 booths; and, of course, dancing* * * * My dear Frank, we're 
 terribly respectable, nowadays ! Shut down at 10 — no dancing, 
 no fighting, and no singing worth alluding to* * * * And yet, a bit 
 nastier, some of it*" 
 
 Frank, you will have gathered, had an imagination* 
 
 “ A hundred years," said he, 44 an' swings an' roundabouts same 
 as to-day* * * ♦ Ain't that remarkable* Up an' down, an' round 
 an' round* Round and round* Never no forrarder* Wot else is 
 life ? Wot else is ruddy life ? nor yet the world* An' arsk a man 
 to set 'imself agin that an' wish to alter things ? Not 'arf* Not 
 me* Not Mr* Francis Newnes* Round an* round*" 
 
 44 When 'e gits like that," said Mr* Beeton, 44 we 'ops it* Hp 1 " 
 ejaculated he, seizing the grinning Alfred by the ear* 
 
 But exactly at that moment the door half opened and a female 
 voice shouted, 44 Come on, kid !" 
 
 The Corporal turned with a roar that sent my heart jumping* 
 
 44 Stuff yer stocking down yer throat," he shouted, 44 an' finish 
 yer noise !" 
 
 44 Cornin', missus," said Mr* Beeton, hurriedly, and looking across 
 at me* 44 Me an' Alf is cornin', cornin' quick*" 
 
 At that the door opened completely, and a vigorous lady, whom 
 I at once recognized as the Oriental Orgy, stood silhouetted in vivid 
 white and yellow in the black doorway* She looked first, with a 
 certain surprise, at the lumbering Mr* Beeton, and then turned, I 
 judged, to make some observations to the Corporal* On seeing me, 
 she paused; and then smiled down at me contemptuously from the 
 height of her superb and florid health* 
 
 44 'Ullo," said she, to Frank* 44 Got a friend, 'ave you ?" 
 
 She compared me rapidly with the photograph, absorbed the 
 situation and then said: 
 
143 
 
 MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 44 Good-night, Mr* Newnes* Keep good*" 
 
 And she disappeared* 
 
 The Corporal was scarlet with rage, and remained with his 
 mouth open, at a loss for words* 
 
 44 Good-night all," said Mr* Beeton, and tumbled out of the van* 
 44 Wasn't that the lady," I said, 44 who performs next door ? I 
 shouldn't like that job* I hate snakes*" 
 
 He found his tongue* 
 
 44 Performs ?" said he* 44 An' a blame fool I was when I took on 
 this 'ere performance, makin' a damn show o' meself hollerin' on 
 the roundabouts and 'er and 'er lousy snakes thrown in along with it 
 by old Smarle, that's 'er father, wot owns the lot an' dragged me 
 into it when I couldn't rightly 'elp meself, 'avin' no job at the time 
 an' reckoning to do well on the roundabout* 'Ow could I 'elp 
 meself ? 'Ad to live; leastways I don't see why, but live one some- 
 'ow does an' will do, a revolver bein' a fool's way out, I reckon; yes, 
 I never arsk to live nor yet to be born, but take the sneak's way out 
 of it, that I never will* An' bound 'and an' foot, I am, by the agree- 
 ment, an' 'e knows it, an' that's wot I say, round an ' round, an' once 
 you're on, if the darn thing don't stop, no more do you not stop, 
 unless you chuck yerself off*" He pulled himself together a little 
 and indicated the disposition of the van* 44 That's where I sleeps," 
 said he, pointing with his thumb at the fore cabin, but staring at the 
 floor* 44 An' old Beeton an' the lad they doubles up in 'tother; an 
 as for Nellie Smarle, she 'as her tent an' van neighbourin', an' comin 
 in 'ere at this hour o' night to git me to go an' clean up for 'er an' 
 prepare the lightin' for to-morrow, it's the limit* If it wasn't for old 
 Beeton an' young Alf, that's wot I'd be doin'; slavin' for Mistress 
 Nellie* Round an* round* Can't get off it*" 
 
 44 Well, old son," said 1, 44 all the more reason for your turning in 
 now* I must, too* See you to-morrow* Good-night* * * *" 
 
 He looked at me, paused, and then said good-night and sat down 
 again, staring at the table* 
 
 I climbed down the ladder, turned, and very nearly tripped 
 over Beeton and Alf, who were sitting smoking on the end of 
 the van* 
 
 44 Finished already ?" said I* They looked at one another and 
 then mumbled something* We said good-night, and I advanced 
 into the open space down the middle of the Fair* I hadn't gone 
 twenty yards before I heard his hurried steps* 
 
 44 I've bin lyin' to you," he said, taking me hard by the elbow* 
 
144 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 44 I know, kid,” said I, disengaging myself and putting my arm 
 through his. 
 
 “ It ain't no good/' he said, and sighed. 
 
 44 What isn't ?" 
 
 44 Lyin' to you." 
 
 But we were now opposite our house. 
 
 44 You'd better come in for a minute," I said. 44 We can't talk 
 here." 
 
 He came, docile, unable to think much, and doing as he was 
 told. 
 
 I stood him with his back to the mantelpiece and then placed 
 myself in front of him with my hands on his shoulders. He kept 
 his head a little sideways, eyes on the ground. 
 
 44 It wasn't really a lie. You didn't expect me not to understand 
 you, and you didn't want me not to." 
 
 44 Now I'll swear that's the truth," he said, looking up and staring 
 at me ; but his eyes were bloodshot. 44 When I hear we're cornin' 
 to Wilchurch, I says to meself, * Now Gawd 'elp us, for I can't but 
 meet 'im. Meet 'im for sure I must, seein' as it's a cert 'e'll bring 
 'ospital cases to the Fair.' Meet you I must, an' wot 'll I say to you ? 
 Even if you notices nothink, I'm not goin' to act no lie to you, let 
 alone tell you none. An' I says deliberate, * Tell 'im straight out 
 I will, an' not shirk it. 'E's got 'is religion, an' it ain't mine; an' 
 I've got my opinions, an' they ain't 'is, an' livin' accordin' to 'em 
 I am, an' will; an' tell 'im straight out I will, honest; an' why not ? 
 That's my philosophy of nature, that is. I'm livin' natural, I am, 
 an' let 'im 'ave it straight I will.' " 
 
 44 Well, why didn't you ?" 
 
 44 Couldn't. Fair couldn't. Why ? Dunno." 
 
 44 I'll tell you. Because you didn't believe your own philosophy, 
 old philosopher ! It's not your opinion that it's all all right." 
 
 44 It is my opinion," he said, jaw set. 
 
 44 Is it ? Was it, even when I saw you in London ? Was it the 
 evening we all went out on the river — Hallinan, and Sergeant, and 
 you and I ?" 
 
 44 Now you're torturin' me," he said. 
 
 44 You said you'd bruise no more souls . ♦ ♦ you're bruising hers 
 — yes you are — and your own." 
 
 The veins of his forehead swelled thick; his lips quivered like a 
 child's. 
 
 I sat down on my bed and pulled him down in front of me. He 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 145 
 
 put his elbows on my knees and his head down between his clenched 
 fists. 
 
 44 Cry, old boy/" I said. 
 
 He was silent. I adored God in his heart, and waited. 
 
 Suddenly he said , 44 Can't/' and was silent again. 
 
 Then he looked up. 
 
 44 Mind you," he said , 44 it's you . It's you every time that I minds 
 about. It ain't God. Don't you go thinkin' it. It ain't God. 
 Nor yet it ain't Christ. Don't you think it. I knew it'd make you 
 desp'rate; but I thought I'd bluff it out, an' I'd kid meself into 
 thinkin' you'd take it sportin', sayin' as it were my instinct an' not 
 'avin' no religion, well, why not ? But it's no go." 
 
 He sprang up, furious. 
 
 44 Good enough," he said. 44 I'm through with you. Fini ! I 
 don't want no more o' you. You've been a gentleman to me, but 
 we'll never think the same, an' I'll never do different. I knows 
 meself. Let me out. I want to go 'ome. Better never see you 
 no more. You're failed with me. You make me mad. I'll make 
 me own life, damn it." 
 
 We went downstairs. 
 
 I felt it might be the last chance. Two minutes — but who could 
 tell? I said: 
 
 44 You must let me walk back to the van with you, Frank." 
 
 44 Please yerself," said he, airily. 
 
 He sighed in a shuddering short of way once, but didn't speak 
 again. 
 
 At the tent I said good-night, and held out my hand. 
 
 44 Night-night," said he, but didn't take it. 
 
 It was just one o'clock. From the two churches at either end of 
 the Fair, ancient bells tolled; and from all over the old town, solemn 
 music echoed. The vans and the roundabouts stood bleached in 
 the starlight, which was keen. They all looked dead. They might 
 have been the Fair of centuries ago. Life repeated itself, and 
 Death, an endless duel; and time tolled itself out. 
 
 10 
 
Chapter XV 
 
 N EXT day, for all I know, I played the coward* But I felt 
 that it was impossible for me to go near the Corporal again for 
 a while* I felt I might drive him desperate and make the 
 separation permanent, for just now he hated me* So I went round 
 directly after lunch to the Sergeant, and told him, in outline, what 
 had happened* I suggested he might try going to the Gondolas 
 himself and getting into conversation, and then come round to me* 
 He came, in fact, as early as three o'clock, which I took to be a 
 bad omen, and when I saw his worried face I knew that things 
 hadn't gone well* 
 
 44 What happened ?" I asked* 
 
 He shook his head* 
 
 44 No go," said he* 
 
 “ What did you do ?" 
 
 44 I went to his merry-go-round," he said, 44 and the moment I 
 saw him I knew there'd be nothing doing* He wasn't drunk, I 
 think, but he'd certainly been drinking. Father, and his face was 
 fixed-like* And he wasn't doing business* Don't know why* 
 Perhaps that sort of jerk in the machinery was too much for 'em; 
 they'd stand there and look on and scream when the boats went 
 jerking back, you know, but then they'd go along and try the 
 ordinary ones* But somehow I think it was more than that* More 
 like the way he shouted at them* Real angry, he was* Shouting 
 in an insulting kind of way, and, of course, they don't like that* 
 Wouldn't try it* Well, I went and stood immediately beneath him, 
 and I'm dead certain he saw me, because he stiffened up, sort of; 
 his face went all stiff and he broke off yelling for a moment; but he 
 didn't let on, but started yelling again. Then I profited by his 
 stopping to take breath, and 4 Hullo, Corp !' I cried* But he 
 wouldn't take any notice* Then I shout out, 4 Hullo, Corporal 
 Newnes 1 How goes it ?' He had to notice that, and he cries out, 
 4 Alludin' to me. Captain ? Some mistake* I ain't no Corporal/ 
 4 No, but you was,' I said , 4 don't you remember Ward B III* in the 
 
 146 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 147 
 
 old hospital ?' 4 Stow it/ he says. 4 I never ain't bin in no 'ospital; 
 so get on in the Gondolas an' pay your threepence and let me get 
 along with me job. Out o' the gangway !' And with that he starts 
 shouting again. So I saw it was no go." 
 
 44 Well, that sounds pretty hopeless," I said. 
 
 44 Cheer up. Father," said this excellent man. 44 If I were you 
 I'd go round to Miss Barbara and let her have a try." 
 
 44 But I can't send her alone into that Fair," I said, 44 and neither 
 you nor I can go v/ith her, because he'd see us and it would be spoilt. 
 Besides, I really couldn't ask her to — well, to risk being insulted." 
 
 44 I reckon she'd be real unhappy, and hurt," said he, 44 if you 
 didn't give her the chance." 
 
 44 Well, I'll go round," I said. 44 There may be a solution. 
 Meanwhile, do be saying some Hail Mary's." 
 
 I went, and the Hail Mary's produced the solution in the shape 
 of Cecil Calthrop, who was motoring northwards to some shoot or 
 other, and had broken his journey here for tea. 
 
 I explained the situation, and Barbara, of course, said she'd go; 
 and I confided her to Cecil, telling him in his turn to come round 
 and say how things had gone. 
 
 He came up at about six, very flushed. 
 
 44 I say, I say, I say /" he began, at once. 44 That's a nasty job. 
 My dear old dear, is that the sort of thing you bring Barbara up 
 against several times a week ? Gee, that girl's some girl; she's it, 
 and then some I She came along with me thinking how you men 
 had muddled it all, and how her sweet girlish smile'd hit him where 
 he feels he wants to cry, and reckoning she'd collar the goods and 
 give you a percentage of the rake-off. And keeping a strangle-hold 
 on her rosary, though thinking I didn't get that. But I did. I'm 
 the all-round eye, I am. And when we got to the Gondolas, I ask 
 you ! 4 Keep out of sight,' she says to me. 4 I'm the bright 
 peculiar star this turn. Spot-light on me, every time and all the 
 time. You fade out,' or words to that effect. Point was, if she 
 failed, I've got to go round later and try my hand. If he sees me 
 with her, I can't go again, get me ? And she goes on to the steps 
 and she smiles fit to split the Pyramids, and your little friend, he 
 stops in the middle of his super-yell as if he'd been shot, and he 
 turned purple, and then — gee ! Some will-power, that lad's got. 
 Pulled himself together, and when she holds out her hand, still 
 smiling, he wouldn't see it, but looks above her head and yells at 
 her; and damn it, I could have killed him," said he, suddenly 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 148 
 
 dropping his pose of the moment* 44 Called out to her to know if 
 she was lonely and he'd take her round himself; called himself by 
 his full name and title/' said Cecil, reviving; 44 Corporal Francis 
 Newnes, the gay lad, the meaty boy with the girls, damn him," said 
 he relapsing suddenly again, 44 and stopped the whole show for her 
 to climb into a gondola, and got in himself* 4 An' we'll 'ave the 
 blinds down,' he said* Of course she couldn't stand it* Even the 
 crowd growled a bit, and told him to shut his nasty mouth* She 
 ran down the steps like a hare, and I took her home right then* But 
 oh ! that girl's pluck ! Didn't speak, but walked with her head 
 high, not angry, I mean not sick because he'd insulted her like that, 
 for she knew he knew her; but because she wasn't going to make a 
 scene in the crowd* But just as she got to the house, she began to 
 cry* And she ran round through the garden with her handkerchief 
 up* And I knew better than to follow* My dearest dear padre, 
 but what a job !" 
 
 44 He's mad," I said* 44 Why on earth did I risk her going ?" 
 
 44 She'd have hated it if you hadn't asked her* D'you think that 
 girl minds because of — of that? It's him she's thinking of* She 
 knows he's got hell's own torments inside of him, before he'd act 
 like that.” 
 
 44 I can't possibly suggest your going there again." 
 
 44 Suggest, my venerable sir ? I should hope not* It'd be up to 
 you to order if I required first aid from you at all* I'm going round 
 at eight, when it's tuned up properly* Yes, sir ♦ And come round 
 here after my own modest efforts. Me not go ? I'll go, you bet, 
 and go for it good !" 
 
 44 If you insist," I said , 44 go and look in at the Oriental Orgy, too, 
 and tell me what you think." 
 
 44 You reprobate !" he cried* 44 That's the bright idea* Who 
 said you'd lost 'em ?" 
 
 44 Lost what ?" 
 
 44 Brains," said he; 44 grey-matter: thinking-spark* I'll go and 
 captivate the Orgy, and he'll get jealous and breathe her the last 
 good-bye." 
 
 44 Ah, don't fool," I said. 44 It doesn't admit of it* Come back 
 when you've tried what's possible." 
 
 44 Say a prayer for me between now and then," said he, looking 
 at me with profound eyes* 44 I'm the mere machinery in this 
 stunt." 
 
 Towards eleven he came back, certainly in a wild state of excite- 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 149 
 
 ment , and looking extraordinarily dissipated* I don't know how 
 he managed it, because he wore immaculate evening dress; an opera 
 hat and a monocle were the only unexpected additions* But he 
 did look most amazingly raffish* 
 
 44 I may as well say at once," said he, huddling himself into an 
 armchair, 44 that it's no good* None*" 
 
 Then he said, giving rein to his excitement, after that moment's 
 control : 
 
 44 I went to the Orgy first* Pretty fatuous; but a bit of extra 
 about it, somehow* Couldn't quite make out what, till your little 
 pal came in and Gorgons weren't in it with his bright, kindly eyes* 
 Talking of eyes, she'd been making goo-goo eyes at me, till then* 
 Stuck myself right in the front, I did; couldn't but see me; and I 
 put on the stage-box yearn, and up to it, she was, in a flash* And 
 suddenly, she went rigid. Eyes glued to a mystery spot behind me* 
 Worked myself round gradually* There he was, by the side; and 
 no more pretty-gentleman touch for me * I tell you, that woman's 
 a study ! Rotten all through, that's clear; and got him under her 
 thumb, sure thing; but if so, he's got her under both thumbs and all 
 his fingers and his boots, if you ask me* Loves him, she does, but 
 goes in terror of her life all day and night. Oo ! Cold shudders* 
 Out I got, moment the show switched off* Then I drooped off 
 to the Gondolas." 
 
 44 Well ?" 
 
 44 Bit more crowded to-night. Packed, in fact* Crowd rougher, 
 and relished his talk* I say, my sainted papa, but you've got a 
 rotten set of girls in this old village* Brrr ! And the lads just suit 
 'em* However, I wriggle in to the steps, and there I lean, hat well 
 on back of my head, and looking more than a bit merry, and I laugh 
 Har Har at his riskier bits, and at last he begins to take notice of me 
 and shouts at me, a bit, and I laugh louder than ever, and then I 
 start shouting, too* 4 Dry work, professor, what ?' I yell* 4 America's 
 a drippin' sop, to me, me lord,' he answers* 4 An' the Sahara's a sea o' 
 syrup to my throat*' 4 /'ll take it on a bit, dear old scout,' I say , 4 /'ll 
 give 'em Juicy Joe, I will, trust me, and, meanwhile, you hop round 
 to the Kiss-and-Run, and order yourself a quick one, and put it down 
 to the Honourable Cecil Calthrop of Park Lane, West One*' Yes 
 — I play that tiny card when needed ! And before he can stop 
 me I jump up beside him and give him a shove in the solar-plexus, 
 and before he has time to say 4 damn,' I start haranguing the pro- 
 letariat, and gee ! I get 'em every time* Crude, my eloquence, I 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 150 
 
 confess. Azure-blue my metaphors; search me ; if I know where 
 I got it all from ! You're a bit too young, papa, to have me repeat 
 it. But roll up ? the Atlantic's a skating-rink to the billows of that 
 mob; I worked those Gondolas for a solid hour and a quarter, and 
 when the Fair shut down I fell fainting into the arms of Mr. Francis 
 Newnes, and he supported me to the shelter of his happy little van 
 and gave me sal-volatile." 
 
 44 Well, you're a genius, Cecil; but I simply can't laugh to-night." 
 
 “ I know, my dear old dear," he said, and I began to wish his 
 excitement would die down. 44 Don't tire yourself trying. Well, 
 when I revived, we sat down to steak and kidney pie, and gad ! I 
 needed it. And I was heading well to harbour, for he was taken with 
 me, Mr. Newnes was, and he was giving me the list of all the places 
 the Fair was to travel to, and I was meaning to re-arrange my 
 autumn engagements in view of following him round a little, and 
 receiving him in my arms when he gets his knock-out, which I 
 reckoned he was sure of pretty soon, because that loving couple 
 won't last long. And plonk ! the castle crashes, for the door opens, 
 and in comes the Orgy herself. Some Orgy, with the paint off, or 
 half off ! Brrr ! Don't ask me to tell you. And he roars at her, 
 oh, horrid ! After all, she's a woman, or was. And a fine one, too, 
 by some standards, I'd say. But he tells her to git, and she says, 
 meek, but angry, can't she come in and sit down a bit and have a sup 
 of something, and he drives her out, and I tell you that old machinery- 
 man of his looked properly ashamed of the whole proceeding, and 
 even the boy showed his teeth. You never saw such a change in 
 Mr. Newnes ! Quite affable, though too damned familiar a minute 
 before; but now — whew ! Face red, eyes red, cheeks all swollen, 
 veins right out on his forehead ! Mon Dieu , how he hates her. And 
 when she's gone, he sweeps the plates off the table — crash 1 And 
 he turns on me and tells me to take myself off. Says he saw .me at 
 the Orgy show. Says I'm after his woman. Says he knows my 
 sort. Takes a handful of coins and chucks 'em at me. Says he 
 wouldn't have my earnings in his pockets not if they were millions. 
 Well, I try to argue a bit, and pacify him; no good; tells me he'll 
 chuck me out if I don't go. And what could I do, with his game 
 leg and he as drunk as a lord; that's what he was by then. Reckon 
 the liquor bit suddenly. I'd have boxed him easily, sober, and with 
 
 both legs working, but as it was " he shrugged his shoulders. 
 
 44 Out I slunk, and here I am. Failed, Father, I'm afraid. If I'd 
 had more grace in me, I'd have won. As it is . . ." He shrugged 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 151 
 
 his shoulders again, and all his excitement was gone so completely 
 that you couldn't have imagined it ever had existed. 
 
 “ Well/' I said, “ then we'll just leave it all to God." 
 
 44 I wish we'd left it there a bit more from the outset," he said* 
 44 I expect I trusted to my method. Thought I'd be bound to get 
 home on it. My God ! D'you think I've mucked the whole 
 business ? But I had to get into contact, somehow. But mark 
 you ! I was enjoying it. I was selfish. I always am. I'm the 
 most selfish little beast in England. Oh, but I wanted to say, I 
 didn't overstep the line when I was fooling around that Orgy, you 
 know. She did all the eye-play." 
 
 “ Of course. Don't be ridiculous." 
 
 44 Yes. But I wanted you to be sure that there was no positive 
 taint that I could have helped, that interfered with God's grace." 
 
 44 Cecil, the awful puzzle is this. It's really I who've driven him 
 desperate. Suppose I'd said from the outset that it all didn't 
 matter much; after all, he's got entangled, but he'll shake loose again; 
 and nearly all the world would think me every kind of a fool for 
 making a fuss about so ordinary a thing as him and her — well, 
 suppose I'd just been easy-going — and, well, he's not a Catholic, 
 he hasn't the Catholic conscience — all these scenes wouldn't have 
 happened. Poor old Sergeant Raikes wouldn't have got that public 
 snub — and he's got his pride, you know, and feelings — he liked the 
 Corporal up to a point; and, of course, he's upset because he thinks 
 1 am; and as for Barbara ! I go hot and cold when I reflect on that 
 incident. And now you." 
 
 44 My dear Father," he said, looking at me quickly, and then 
 turning away again. 44 Excuse me, but you're wrong there. He'd 
 have been heart-broken if you'd been easy-going. The Christian 
 ideal is the one beautiful and noble thing in life for him; and if you'd 
 demolished it — well, he'd have lost all belief in anything and every- 
 one, and in you; and you'd never have been able to help him again, 
 ever. Yes, heart-broken he'd have been. He loves you; and to 
 see you climb down would have been the end of the world for him. 
 You're the only person who in any way is offering to him what he's 
 sickening for." 
 
 44 But what are we to do ?" 
 
 “ Not despair, anyway. You might have, if he'd been cheery 
 with the Sergeant and polite to Barbara, and unchanged to you. 
 Though even then you needn't have. God gets the better even of 
 the cynic; even of the corrupt." 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 152 
 
 He remained looking steadily before him, his clean-cut profile 
 really beautiful, just then* The two little vertical lines graven close 
 either side of his mouth were deeper, just now* Fm quite sure they 
 positively, as a rule, annoyed him* He always protested they were 
 due to dissipated living; really, they meant an almost terrible self- 
 schooling* 
 
 “ Will He get the better of him ?" I asked* 
 
 “ How can I tell ?" he muttered* 44 Fm a kid* Fm a clumsy 
 inexperienced hobbledehoy* Fve only just left school* * * ♦ But 
 I will tell you what's happened hitherto, and I bet Fm right* I bet 
 she saw him somewhere when he was down and out, after his shop 
 went bust* And I bet she went crazy on him; that sort of woman 
 does, especially when she's getting middle-aged* And as for her, 
 she'd be middle-aged quite young* Well, that wiry, hungry, know- 
 ing type's what'd get her* She'd go crazy* And she'd rope him 
 into her show, and sooner than starve, he'd come; and — well, after 
 that spell of self-repression you told me about — trading on his own 
 will-power, and with no motive except to defy you — prove you 
 wrong in what you'd be bound to think of him — he'd experience 
 some sort of spell himself, at least, as long as her first mad adoration 
 lasted; and each of 'em would be boss in their own way; only, when 
 he began to realize how thoroughly she was financial boss, and 
 when she began to play the tyrant, the spell would wane; he can't 
 get away, and he's furious at having to stay; he still loves a little, but 
 he hates more ; and, my God, if he doesn't break away soon, I 
 wouldn't answer for her neck* But he believes; he's fighting a losing 
 battle against Faith*" 
 
 44 He mentioned a Mr* Smarle who, I understood, was boss*" 
 
 44 Mr* 'Arris," said he, 44 there ain't no sich a person*" 
 
 “ My dear psychologist," I said, “ please God you're right; and 
 again, please God you mayn't be* I don't know I Anyhow, human 
 methods aren't going to help us now at all, I think* We've reached 
 the limit*" 
 
 44 They aren't ?" he said, springing to his feet* 44 You really 
 think so ? Then that's great ! Because we can go straight to God* 
 How I envy people, who always can 1 Look at Barbara*" 
 
 44 Does she ?" 
 
 “ She'll be able to, directly she's a Carmelite*" 
 
 44 What have you been talking about, you two ?" 
 
 “ We haven't been* But don't tell me you don't see it for your- 
 self* She can use all the human little ways — Gad 1 can't she though 1 
 
MR, FRANCIS NEWNES 153 
 
 — but she needn't, I don't believe she's being asked to, I believe 
 her soul's meant to burn straight away into God, and then to come 
 back and blaze in other souls. Let her go quick, padre, I want 
 to have her praying for me in Carmel," 
 
 44 I may as well tell you," said I, 44 that I think it'll be the Poor 
 Clares, Don't speak about it. She's just mentioned it," 
 
 He looked graver still, 
 
 44 Ah 1 The Poor Clares," he said, 44 If she can be that , , ," 
 Then he got up, 
 
 44 I'd like to go to confession. Father, please, I wish I'd looked 
 in and gone before starting on that job. Can't be too clean for that 
 work. Give me a minute or two," 
 
 In reality he was always ready; but he knelt, for a while, behind 
 me, and then the blood of Christ stole through the intricate re- 
 cesses of his soul. 
 
 Then he said, “ I suppose I can come to Mass here to-morrow ? 
 I'd better be off now, I billeted myself at the Travers' and the 
 Sergeant'll be sitting up to let me in. He has to be up early, and 
 so'll I, if I have to come round here. Or wait, I'd better go with 
 Barbara," 
 
 44 I can go across directly I get up," I said , 44 and ask leave to say 
 my Mass at the church. Eight, I'd like to give Communion to the 
 two of you," 
 
 44 Fine," he said, “ Oh, and cheer up ! I've got a couple of 
 instructees for you, and p'raps three. One's a perfectly gorgeous 
 book-maker; met him at an oyster bar at Ostend; keen as mustard. 
 Then there's a budding diplomat; needs to be pulled together a bit; 
 very gilded; rather an ass, but I think he'll come along. And the 
 other cert is my mother's maid's young man. She's — well — she's 
 rather — well, you know French maids. But once he's in, he'll 
 straighten her up a bit. Blessing, please," 
 
 He dropped down on his knees again, and I gave him my blessing 
 and asked his prayers. 
 
Chapter XVI 
 
 I N October Mr* Travers caught influenza, and didn't seem 
 likely to recover* Under the strain Barbara began to feel she 
 wasn't being honest if she didn't clear up the situation, and she 
 wrote to Reggie to tell him that should her father die she meant to 
 be a nun* She told me this, and also that she was sure Reggie would 
 realize she wanted it conveyed to Geoffrey Blake* To Geoffrey she 
 couldn't write, of course; because, after all, he hadn't yet asked her 
 definitely to marry him* In this way she displayed not only, I con- 
 sidered, a great faith in God, but a remarkable trust in the nobility 
 of those two young men* 
 
 I heard first from Reggie* 
 
 44 Dear Father, 
 
 44 You know what Barbara's written to me* I believe I half 
 foresaw it, and you know I thought I'd not be able to bear it* Well, 
 it's all right, thank God* It's curious, because I believe I love her 
 as much as ever, but ever since I seriously resolved to carry on 
 helping Blake, the idea doesn't hurt less, but I seem to be able to 
 not mind being hurt* In fact, I feel happier inside than ever yet* 
 I don't think it's just relief that the uncertainty's over, though that's 
 something* But I have a sort of conviction it's all right* I feel 
 very buoyed up — not excited; but I believe your Mass must have 
 been helping me a lot* So much for me* Well, I felt quite sure 
 Blake ought to have it conveyed to him, so I came over to Hanton 
 and wangled a week-end, and I worked the talk round to saying I'd 
 always half thought she meant to be a nun, and now she'd made it 
 clear that when Mr* Travers died she'd do it* He didn't say any- 
 thing then; later on he asked me if I thought it was depression at the 
 idea of losing her father, and I said no, she'd never look at a Convent 
 as an escape, but as a way of offering herself to God, and that she 
 thought she had a vocation* He's seemed a bit dazed since, and he 
 says he's coming over to see you; but I think he meant to convey to 
 me that it wouldn't alter his resolution to become a Catholic, because 
 
 I 54 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 155 
 
 he carried on enquiring about details, and thanked me a lot for 
 helping him* So I hope it's all right* I daresay it may make all 
 the difference to him and me* Cheeriho* 
 
 44 Ever yours, 
 
 " Reggie*" 
 
 44 P*S* — I needn't say, go on remembering me at Mass* I feel very 
 much at a loose end* I think you might invent a course of reading 
 for me* I am awfully ignorant about Mass itself* Couldn't it be 
 that ? — R* You don't know how she occupied all my thoughts* It 
 seems so futile working at one's job now*" 
 
 Three days afterwards Geoffrey appeared* 
 
 We walked out to the hospital together, and all he said about the 
 topic, on the way there, was that no doubt I knew the knock he'd had, 
 and that we'd talk about it a bit later* He was very friendly in the 
 wards; I only took him where there were really bad cases, but one or 
 two men met him in the corridors who had already been to visit him 
 at his office; he remembered them quite well, and he seemed to me 
 glad to be able to meet them less conventionally* He no longer had 
 any army mannerisms, and his voice struck me as singularly respect- 
 ful* I wondered whether this was because, never having been 
 wounded himself, he for the first time sympathised by experience 
 with pain and despondency* But I exulted when he said quite 
 simply, that since I said Mass up here from time to time, he'd value 
 it no end if he could make his first Communion here* I said that 
 Mass was very early, and he said, hesitating a little, that he'd like 
 to be quiet when he was received, and if he might, he'd stay at an 
 hotel in Wilchurch and come up a*m* on his motor-bike* I offered 
 to put him up, and added that he could bring me up, in that case, in 
 his side-car* Neither of us alluded, even remotely, to the idea of 
 his not becoming a Catholic now* 
 
 On the way down he felt he could talk more easily* 
 
 “ I want to say, first," he began , 44 that I consider Barbara's been 
 absolutely first-rate* You know nothing was due to me* She 
 needn't have sent Orwylstree — because I'm sure she did send him, 
 though he was as tactful as possible; and she never need have 
 thought of me at all* But what I mean is, she's been so honour- 
 able* She never tried to persuade me to be a Catholic; she never 
 made the least suggestion she'd be any different if I did become one ; 
 and what strikes me as finest, she hasn't allowed me to interfere with 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 156 
 
 what she thinks is right, even though she might well suppose an 
 average sort of man like me might chuck the whole business when 
 I saw she wasn't going to have me* Well, I suppose I've got to 
 give up thinking of her like — like that; but I shall always respect her 
 more and more for going through with it* D'you know. I'd be half 
 sorry, in a way, if she chucked the idea of being a nun, now*" 
 
 44 It hasn't been too — painful ?" 
 
 44 Well, d'you know. I'd never have believed it* I'd have thought 
 I'd go mad if you'd suggested this even a couple of months ago* 
 But — well, you know, when I wake up in the morning, I feel right 
 away that something's happened, and it takes me a second or two 
 to remember what exactly; and then I feel a sort of thump — don't 
 laugh 1 — in my tummy; a sort of horrid jar; and on and off during 
 the day I feel sort of bruised and sick all of a sudden ; but, honestly, 
 I don't feel miserable* I even feel half — well, rejoicing, sometimes 
 * * ♦ I daresay you understand this sort of thing, but I'm sure I 
 don't*" 
 
 “ I think you've become thoroughly unselfish*" 
 
 44 Well, I jolly well ought to have* Don't think me rude, padre, 
 but all your instructions, for which I'm jolly grateful, you know, and 
 even the retreat, all that's nothing to Orwylstree* Absolute heroism. 
 Couldn't have believed it possible* Well, that settled me* That 
 made it clear as daylight that the Catholic religion's absolutely unlike 
 everything else in the wide world* No one would do what he did 
 for anything else that I can possibly think of* And in a way 
 Barbara's done the same sort of thing* It must have cost her fright- 
 fully to think she might be risking my conversion* Jove ! she's 
 clinched it*" 
 
 44 Also, she showed she trusted you very completely* Next best 
 to — to loving you, Geoffrey* You trust her, and she trusted you* 
 It's a close and beautiful relationship*" 
 
 44 Jove 1" he said* 44 I see how you can have this sort of serious 
 happiness in the middle of, well — I'll own up — the devil of a lot of 
 pain* I believe I've been so deucedly happy I hardly realized how 
 it was hurting*" 
 
 44 What a thin sort of thing pleasure is, compared to happiness 1" 
 44 That's a queer way of putting it 1" he said, and laughed* 
 
 44 Well, isn't it true ? How dull people are who exist for having a 
 good time 1 I'm very seldom bored; but, honestly, I have to 
 struggle not to be bored by them ! How shallow ! How selfish I 
 And how unsuccessful 1" 
 
MR, FRANCIS NEWNES 157 
 
 “ If I live to be ninety, I shall never stop thanking God for letting 
 me see what unselfishness means, in Orwylstree, You begin to 
 believe the whole world's fighting for its own hand, and you sud- 
 denly see that ♦ What's a general or a prime minister or a millionaire 
 to that ? Poor little nonentities !" 
 
 44 God is initiating you," I said, “ But don't ever be contemptuous. 
 One could be any of those things and unselfish !" 
 
 44 I know; but what I'd single out to go down on my knees before, 
 would be the unselfishness. And you know, he never said a word 
 about it, , ♦ , I mean, never hinted it, , , , I'm so blind that I 
 might never have guessed it if you hadn't pointed it out, I say — " 
 cried he, struck by yet another idea — 44 what a life that fellow's 
 leading inside himself — doesn't require to advertise — doesn't seem 
 to need sympathy, even " 
 
 “ Oh, but he does ! He feels very very small and bewildered and 
 lonely, I assure you. He's all right right inside; but he doesn't feel 
 self-sufficient more than you or anyone else does. He requires 
 friends, too," 
 
 44 By Jove ! I hope I may be one of them," 
 
 “ Be sure of that," 
 
 After a long pause, I said : 
 
 44 Don't you think all this hunt for pleasure and excitement is a 
 very rotten thing ?" 
 
 44 Isn't it just after-war reaction ?" 
 
 “ Is it ? Hasn't it gone on too long ? Doesn't it mean people 
 just snatch at all they can get in the way of selfish satisfaction ? And 
 isn't that a lack of principle, much deeper than a mere superficial 
 irritability ? And by now they know , They must know the misery 
 that exists, and the frightful poverty, , , , I'm afraid I feel a lot 
 more strongly than I think on this subject. Yet I don't know l 
 Is it just that people should pay £1,000 for furs ? I saw that the 
 other day. Or food, ♦ ♦ , I once had a dinner which made me ask 
 myself quite seriously whether I'd not committed a sin in eating it. 
 Ever so many courses, and each at almost ten shillings, and special odd 
 things, not even very nice, , , , However, the lad asked me to 
 come; he was on leave; he'd have chucked his money about whether 
 or no. And I remember I shrove him before he went to bed, and 
 he had communion next day — a very simple, honest lad. But, 
 sincerely, until we learn austerity all over again, we shall go from 
 bad to worse; revolution will be the least bad thing 1 We shall lose 
 our souls, ♦ , ♦" 
 
158 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 44 1 say, you know ! But this is pretty awful ! I'd looked forward 
 to having quite a number of good dinners with you, on and off 1 
 Won't you come ?" 
 
 44 Sure ! Very glad to. But this much I will stick to. Unless a 
 man is putting a strong dose of unselfishness into his life somewhere 
 it's a disgusting thing to see him merely out for a good time; it's 
 disgusting, stupid, vile taste, and nowadays half criminal. So 
 there ! Meanwhile, mon cher, we shall buy some chestnuts off this 
 fellow and we'll roast 'em for tea. You buy 'em, and say something 
 amiable to him so that he'll feel warmer." For the October evening 
 was closing damp and chill. 
 
 It was early yet for fires, but in honour of Blake's visit I had pre- 
 pared one. He sat on the hearth-rug, roasting chestnuts, during his 
 tea, and stayed down there after we'd cleared away — for I'd carried it 
 to my room so that we need not break our talk in two unnecessarily. 
 And it is so much easier to talk when you are roasting chestnuts or 
 playing with a poker, anyhow. So there he sat, propped against my 
 knee, growling hideous imprecations when he burnt his fingers, and 
 as pleased as a boy when the shells came off the chestnuts properly* 
 He was like a man who had been very badly wounded, but was so 
 healthy in himself that the wound healed well and quickly. To drop 
 simile: he was content; and not because he was selfish or shallow, 
 as a lot of things made me realize, and not least what he said next — 
 but because he was being vigorously helped within himself to recon- 
 stitute his life. I don't say that this inside help was his own good- 
 will alone; Reggie's human will was intertwined with his; Reggie's 
 supernaturalized human will; and also the human and the divine 
 will of our Lord, healer of all hearts. 
 
 After a longish silence, during which he made such a mess of the 
 chestnuts that it was clear he was thinking hard, he said: 
 
 44 There've been moments, mind you, only moments, when I've 
 asked myself all the silly old stock questions. At least, I suppose 
 everyone asks himself them." 
 
 44 Like what ?" 
 
 “ Like, Why is there such a lot of suffering in the world ?" 
 
 “ What else ?" 
 
 44 It sounds vilely self-important — but after all I am myself — Why 
 should I be put through all this ? I don't quite like to say I haven't 
 deserved it; because at the back of my mind I feel I may have; or 
 even, it may be silly to talk of deserving or not deserving it, if it does 
 one good. Like that woman and the baby and the dentist you told 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES i59 
 
 us of ; it would be silly of the kiddy to say, 4 What have I done to 
 deserve having my tooth out ?' " 
 
 44 But listen* That doesn't quite solve your difficulty — at least, 
 not on a general scale* For the teeth came out, and I presume the 
 spots went away ! The poison came out of the system, anyhow* 
 But what about the people who don't know how to use suffering ? 
 For it's no good unless you use it* Perhaps the suffering doesn't 
 get the spiritual sickness out* It's not quite as automatic as teeth 
 and spots*" 
 
 44 Yes," said he* 44 I'd not followed it up like that* What about 
 the innocent people who suffer, and wouldn't resent it if they knew 
 how to use it, but don't know how to, and can't ? It wouldn't 
 improve them, but spoil them* * * * By Jove !" 
 
 44 Wasn't there one more question ?" 
 
 He hesitated* 
 
 44 There was and there wasn't* It occurred to me to ask. Why 
 does God make a world where there's suffering at all ? But I 
 wouldn't quite let myself* If there's one thing that's clear it's that 
 I'm incapable of judging God* I really have not got the cheek for 
 that* I couldn't judge even my parents properly when I was a kid*" 
 
 44 Well, not judge exactly* But even a child, I think, often has 
 a very accurate instinct of what's just or not, and resents unjust 
 actions of parents* And even with God, it's possible to look at His 
 actions in a limited sort of way, so that if what you see of them were 
 all there was to be seen, they would be cruel or unjust*" 
 
 44 Well, but the fault's in my way of looking at them; that's easily 
 grasped* Not in them* You showed me at the very beginning 
 that God's infinite and perfect and can't be otherwise, and His 
 action's right and must be* Whereas I'm bound to be limited in my 
 view and probably wrong about anything that's even a good deal 
 larger than I am*" 
 
 44 Yes: but as you said, you're you ; and so abstract considerations 
 like that mayn't serve much at a crisis, unless they've really per- 
 meated you and constructed the inside of your mind for you, and 
 regulated the whole flow of your instinct* That takes long* Mean- 
 while, our Lord came and revealed what it would take the intelli- 
 gence too long to see for itself*" 
 
 44 All the same I have asked myself if there could be a world with- 
 out pain*" 
 
 44 What did you decide ?" 
 
 44 I thought of an odd thing* It doesn't really seem to apply* 
 
160 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 But it's this. If there's a lot of things, can one avoid pain ? I don't 
 mean men, but a lot of anything, if it's alive." 
 
 44 You mean they're bound to fight ?" 
 
 44 Well, I mean thing A needs, say, food. Thing B needs food 
 too. Well, perhaps there's plenty of food for both somewhere, but 
 not here. Well, whether they fight or no, one's got to go without 
 and starve, or get only half of what it needs and be spoilt." 
 
 44 Yes, yet the struggle for life is not more deep set than the associ- 
 ative, friendly instinct. The world and its contents do tend to 
 group themselves — to associate. But even if that's true and works 
 on a general scale, the individual may get a thin time of it. How- 
 ever, outside of man, I suppose living creatures have only instinct, 
 and not ideas, so they don't know that they're suffering — in fact 
 they aren't. They aren't exactly automatons; but they can't look 
 backwards and forwards, as even old Homer said men could." 
 
 44 That goes part of the way. But it still remains, why did God 
 make a sort of world in which that could happen ?" 
 
 44 D'you think that's really asking why He made a world at all ? 
 If He did, it had to be limited, and made of limited things. All 
 limited things are imperfect, in this sense that they haven't qualities 
 and assets that others have. So they depend on one another, and 
 the associative instinct is possible and even necessary, and therefore 
 the converse of it — that is, fighting." 
 
 44 Well," he said, 44 it's obviously silly to ask why God made a 
 world at all. . . . And anyhow," he went on , 44 the problem really 
 isn't due to things that suffer and don't know it, but to those that do, 
 and don't know why, and can't cope with suffering, and that's us” 
 
 He began boring holes in the red coal with the poker. 
 
 44 Think of this," I began. 44 There's not only a lot of us, and all 
 of us imperfect; but we can't he perfect and 4 rounded off' at any 
 given minute, because we're involved in a process of which the end's 
 nowhere yet in sight." 
 
 44 Will it ever be in sight ?" 
 
 44 Anyone can see it's not in sight in this world; Christians believe 
 the end — I don't mean the mere finish, but the total thing, the 
 living consummation — is in the next." 
 
 44 Yet everyone feels they have a sort of right to happiness right 
 now” 
 
 44 So they have; to a certain happiness; and they'll get the full 
 happiness if they don't murder their chances. But one most 
 certainly will not get full happiness in one chapter only of life, which 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 161 
 
 this world's experiences are; still less, in one paragraph of this 
 chapter* But you can get plenty of happiness, and even joy, if not 
 always pleasure !" 
 
 44 The reason I said 4 right to happiness,' " he said , 44 was because 
 I had a fearful argument with a girl I once took for a week-end to 
 Maidenhead early on in the war* I suppose I began to feel lofty 
 and moral when I got bored, which I did right away on Sunday 
 morning* I began to see it was all wrong, and she said No, but 
 that we had a right to happiness* I said this wasn't happiness, and 
 it was hypocrisy to pretend it was; but that it was a second-rate 
 enjoyment, and didn't even profess to supply either of us with 
 happiness *" 
 
 44 She must have been very annoyed !" 
 
 “ Oh, she said the world was a miserable place anyhow, and you'd 
 better get what you could while you could, and then take an overdose 
 of something and get out of it*" 
 
 44 Well, you could distinguish between pleasure and happiness 
 yourself, even then*" 
 
 “ Jove, so I did 1" 
 
 “ Of course, if one cuts out the 4 future ' life, the main part of life 
 I prefer to say, or is vague about it, one is almost bound to grasp 
 at the immediate pleasure, because it does seem to round life off 
 for the time being, anyhow* Lots of people don't, because they have 
 a measure of self-control based on some sort of better principle, 
 even though not the best*" 
 
 44 What I see, of course, as clear as daylight, is that you don't want 
 to use the better principles, half the time, even when you know 'em*" 
 
 44 In other words, nearly all the pain, and I think all the worst 
 mental pain in the world, is in the long run due to misuse of will; 
 in fact, to sin*" 
 
 44 If you could cut out certain sins," he said , 44 think of the mass of 
 disease and the mental misery that goes with it you would cut out 
 too*" 
 
 44 And money-grabbing," I said* 44 At the root of the war, was 
 injustice ♦ Trying to grab the whole for one's self, or as much as 
 one can get* And at the root of slums, and sweated labour, and 
 horrible childhoods, and drunkenness*" 
 
 44 That's the idea ! Trying to get too much, if not everything* 
 
 I never expect to be a millionaire, and to be a sort of universal king* 
 But I see I do feel an instinct to get all I can — anyhow what'll make 
 me thoroughly comfortable* Pleasure, money, power* ♦ ♦ *" 
 
 ii 
 
162 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 44 So it's up to someone/' said 1 , 44 to preach poverty, chastity and 
 obedience !" 
 
 For some of our most heated discussions had been about priests 
 and religious cutting themselves off from life. Besides, I wanted 
 him to see Barbara as not only doing what was right for her, but 
 what could be very good in itself. 
 
 He perfectly well saw it. 
 
 44 Now and again," he said, twisting his head up and grinning, 
 "your conversation is not unpleasant; but I believe I like quite 
 a number of things you don't say." 
 
 44 After one more explosion of volubility," I replied, 44 I shall 
 become a Trappist and never talk again. But now do just listen for 
 one moment." 
 
 44 You're very seldom volcanic," he said. 44 And don't become 
 a Trappist." 
 
 44 Well, now take the world as full of crowds of decent folks with 
 honest, limited intelligences, and with honest good-wills. They 
 fasten their conscious loves on to what they see. Old Aristotle said 
 that perhaps we don't love really what we seem to, or even think 
 we do, but one mysterious thing in the last resort. But anyhow, 
 we feel attached to all sorts of excellent small things, and are apt to 
 stop there. Now suppose God's educating such persons, not to 
 mention the race. He's trying to make them see more and deeper. 
 In the long run, if they yield to His educating, they'll love more, and 
 more deeply; but at first, if their will is attached resolutely to all 
 those lesser things, they'll feel it painful to be led away from them to 
 anything larger and wider; and they may resist; they may get angry 
 with each new increase of light, and even deny that it is light. Then 
 they get into bad faith. Perhaps God may foresee that (as we say), 
 and in mercy refrain from giving them extra light. But He may see 
 they'll yield in the long run, and then He detaches their will from all 
 sorts of limited things it was fastened down to, and that hurts . If a 
 soul is strong enough, He may put it through a perfect martyrdom." 
 
 " That was a remarkable thing you said about everyone really 
 being in love with one thing. . . ." 
 
 44 Aristotle said it. But so did St. Paul, when he declared that 
 God had made all men of on blood over all the earth, so that they 
 grope after God, if haply they might find Him. They pause at all 
 sorts of images of God — love of country, love of ideas, love of art, 
 love of women, of home — well, I daresay even, you may say, they 
 pause at caricatures — tyranny, lust, amusement . ♦ ♦ but always 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 163 
 
 that leaves them dissatisfied even if they don't know how to go on 
 to what's better* Such people end heartsick and even suicidally 
 miserable, unless they drug themselves and end just stupid* But I 
 daresay average people end, in this life, with a love of a fairly good 
 image of God, such as a happy and affectionate family, in which wife 
 and husband and child, making a home, are a very wonderful image 
 of the Holy Trinity and heaven, though still an image*" 
 
 44 But are we to end as image-worshippers, then ?" 
 
 “No* And that's why all but accomplished Saints are to have 
 their Purgatory ! That is why Purgatory is pain, because it weans 
 you from images which you'd come to think good enough, and to 
 adhere to; and that's why it's happy, because it's making you capable 
 of loving, and of being happy in, the One Real Thing*" 
 
 44 Jove 1 How it all fits together 1" 
 
 44 And even better when you go on to the supernatural world which 
 our Lord has revealed to us* St* Paul speaks similarly, only with 
 a still richer meaning, I daresay, when he says that all created 
 things groan and travail together towards the revelation of the Sons 
 of God ! What a lot there is in that towards l And in that to- 
 gether l If one could only see human history as a combined, asso- 
 ciated struggle — frightfully painful, because away from the limited, 
 the transient, even the departmental good things towards the full 
 revelation, the something else which we couldn't even have guessed 
 at if we'd not been told it — that the maximum, the sum total, of 
 human satisfaction that is naturally open to us, is less than what 
 God means for us* Our perfection, naturally speaking, lies in the 
 life and association and happiness proper to our being sons of men 
 * * ♦ but we are to be able to have a life, and a union, and a happi- 
 ness which are supernatural and proper to what St* Paul can only 
 call being sons of God*" 
 
 “ I have floating ideas in my head," he said, thoughtfully* He 
 was still sitting on the floor, with his back, now, against my knees, 
 and like the Corporal once in London, sought visions in the fire* 
 
 Can you piece them together ?" 
 
 44 What sort of ideas ? Give me a hint !" 
 
 44 The Crucifixion* The Resurrection* People who say Chris- 
 tianity's a kill-joy * ♦ ♦" 
 
 “ Well, so far, surely, it's proclaimed increase of life* And there's 
 its obstinate paradox* Increase of life is the aim, and the method 
 is always death* Christ said, 4 I am the Resurrection and the Life,' 
 and, He was crucified* He said, 4 I am come that they might have 
 
164 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 life, and have it more abundantly/ and also , 4 If any man would come 
 after Me, let him take up his cross daily and follow Me/ His cross ! 
 Go to the gallows. Go right down. Right down. 4 My God , why 
 hast Thou forsaken Me V He hadn't; but it felt like that. Separa- 
 tion even from the felt love of God; from satisfaction in the joy of 
 the love of God. Quite stripped, quite naked. But He can't stop 
 there. He's killed, but He can't stay dead. Mors et vita duello 
 conflixere mirando . Dux vitas mortuus, regnat vivus . The whole of 
 all history is summed up, do you see, in Christ. He bowed His head 
 and died. 4 Consummatum est. f What did He mean ? Just that 
 the pain was over ? Of course not. But that the whole of the 
 doctrine of sacrifice had been summed up, accomplished fully , in 
 Himself. The perfect offering of life to that for which alone in the 
 full sense it's intended, God. Offered utterly, to that to which alone 
 you can offer anything utterly, God. And at once, a sort of sign by 
 anticipation that death hasn't triumphed. From his pierced Heart, 
 living blood and water spring; His Life shall go on cleansing and 
 nourishing His Church — His mystical Body, us ♦ And after a brief 
 space, needed, I suppose, to leave us in no doubt about the reality of 
 His death. He rises. Death has no dominion over Him. He leads 
 captivity captive. Christianity moves by way of death, but never 
 stops there; it passes all the day long through that gate into life." 
 
 44 It's remarkable," he said, 44 how everyone agrees on giving 
 crosses as marks of honour: V.C.'s, M.C.'s, the Legion of Honour. 
 What a transformation ! Can you picture the gallows turning into 
 the symbol of glory because some criminal had died on it nowa- 
 days ?" 
 
 44 No. There'll only ever be one Christ. But He can transform 
 even gallows ! For what a symbol 1 See the Cross ! it's planted in 
 earth, and it goes all the way dow r n; and it's lifted above earth, right 
 up to heaven. And it stretches its arms, this way and that, right 
 round the world. Perhaps, until a man has gone right down, he'll 
 not have it open to him to go right the way up. He must taste that 
 despair, maybe, which is just not despair, for it holds the God it 
 hides." 
 
 He meditated. 
 
 44 And no wonder after that, that the essence of Catholic life is 
 Mass. Communion. Method and aim. You join yourself to 
 Christ. If you join yourself to Him, you join yourself to Him dying 
 and dead, but by that very fact you can't help joining yourself to Him 
 living, rising, and giving life." 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 165 
 
 “ So it's true/' he said, slowly, “ that Christianity can't be com- 
 fortable* Well, we agreed to practically that early on, even before 
 we mentioned Christianity, that you can't make much out of a life 
 that's merely comfortable* And you can't out of a life that's selfish* 
 It's got to be social* And anyone, God or not, who's doing you any 
 good is bound, in a sense, to draw you away from yourself and join 
 you on to other people; and that involves a lot of giving up and self- 
 sacrifice* So one oughtn't to grouse when a sacrifice comes along, 
 because whatever it is, one can turn it into that sort of sacrifice*" 
 
 44 The worst of it is," said I, 44 after the first pang, you find that 
 the sacrifice has stopped being one, and you've got a lot more than 
 you gave up* Then you go on to the next one 1" 
 
 He frankly laughed* 
 
 44 What on earth'll be my next one ?" 
 
 44 Oh well, you needn't have a next one exactly ! You develop 
 an attitude of will* A good will wanting always more union with 
 God and dislike of what holds you back*" 
 
 “ Then/* said he, “ you romp right away into Communion* I see 
 that* How jolly good Christ is, not only telling us so, but acting 
 the whole in person* Gave up everything, and is everything* Got 
 crucified, and, I suppose, needn't have* I suppose His love for 
 God was so perfect and pure He could have loved God in our name 
 and it would have been good enough, and stood for the whole world ?" 
 
 44 He could have* But it wouldn't have been what we wanted, or 
 what some of us want ! Could you do with a perfectly serene success- 
 ful Christ ? I doubt it, old boy; you want a Friend; and a friend 
 can't be a quite different sort of person from you* We need a Christ 
 like and unlike us* I think some of us need a Christ on the gallows* 
 All the way down* ♦ * * But to take us with Him all the way up*" 
 After that I showed him “ In an Indian Abbey," and one or two 
 other books by the same thoughtful and sympathetic writer, so that 
 he could follow up what we had been saying about evil and pain — 
 the only problem which has really sprung to harass men's minds 
 out of those years of war* Then he talked a little about when he 
 could be received, and he did, in fact, become a Catholic the very 
 day before Mr* Travers died, so Barbara had that happiness, too, in 
 her sorrow* 
 
Chapter XVII 
 
 D ECEMBER came* The skies wept, and the streets were 
 full of sodden leaves* Frost refused to clean the atmosphere, 
 and yet the nights were raw and the cold entered your flesh 
 Like rust* Even Barbara, who was staying at the Nazareth Convent, 
 was depressed and unlike herself* She had gone, after all, to live 
 with Lady Sophia for a while, and I think she foresaw that her entry 
 among the Poor Clares might be postponed* Meanwhile, she had 
 to arrange about the furniture of the Wilchurch house, which was 
 being given up, and had come to stay near by for a fortnight* 
 
 One morning the Sergeant came to call, looking worried* 
 
 44 There's two things I want to speak to you about. Father," said 
 he ; 44 one's silly and one's important* Ernestine and I have had 
 our first difference; and we've agreed to refer the matter to you*" 
 
 I foresaw the lifelong enmity of both of them, whatever I said 
 (for the Sergeant would think my advice bad if I agreed with Miss 
 Silver, and Miss Silver would regret it the moment she'd done what 
 she'd wanted to), and so I held my hands up invoking mercy* 
 
 He smiled a pale smile* 
 
 44 She wants," said he , 44 to study social conditions at close quarters, 
 and to go the round of those London doss-houses in the character 
 of one who has nowhere else to sleep and spend the night in each of 
 'em in turn* When I disapprove, which I most emphatically do, she 
 says, 4 Are we taking this social work seriously, or are we not ? If 
 so, it's up to us to have first-hand knowledge*' She says she can't 
 come to harm, because they're in public streets and too full of folk 
 for risks to be run* I put my foot down and say I won't have it, and 
 she puts hers down and turns it into a duty, it having simply started 
 as a wild dream, and no duty about it whatever; and at last we agree 
 to refer it to you* With all due respect, Father, I don't think it's 
 a thing as we need to refer to you, and when married I don't propose 
 to trouble you with continual decisions re our domestic concerns;- 
 but seeing that this is our first divergence," said he with dignity , 44 I 
 thought it would be good to get your guidance*" 
 
 1 66 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 167 
 
 “ Well, listen, old son. It seems to me that apart from its general 
 desirability or the reverse, it is an experiment that wouldn't succeed. 
 I suppose she'd dress up in poor clothes. But she couldn't disguise 
 her voice. Even if she could talk Cockney she couldn't do it well 
 enough to take in Londoners ; and I doubt if a refined woman would 
 get into a position which would make it necessary for her to go there 
 for a night's lodging, not until she'd got very very sick, and down 
 and out indeed. And Miss Silver can't look that. I'm bound to say 
 she looks extremely well, especially since her engagement. If she 
 could use a very broad Scotch accent or an Irish brogue, she might 
 get through with it. As it is, she'd be instantly recognized, and 
 she'd be taken for a detective or an inquisitor of some sort, or at best 
 a newspaper-woman or a novelist. But they'd resent that frightfully, 
 unless she knew how to talk to them intimately, and put 'em at their 
 ease. And she'd have no idea how to do that. Then there's this. 
 I expect she'd consent to this, wouldn't she — she'd go to one that 
 was at least worked respectably — I mean, by the Salvationists, or 
 something like that. She wouldn't want to go where — well, where 
 no one cares what happens. Well, even in a respectable one it 
 would — well, let's see. It would cost her 5d.; that includes a bed and 
 cocoa p.m., and tea a.m., without food. Now even though they have 
 a vermin-proof mattress and covering, well, that's no real good. 
 There's sheets, too, and those only get changed once a week . . . 
 and the beds are only a few inches apart, and no one undresses, you 
 know. She couldn't escape 'em. Think of the trenches. You 
 know ! Then — well, she'd find excellent human nature to study; 
 but she couldn't judge it. She has no background. She'd not be 
 able to judge the language. ♦ ♦ ♦ Nor the arguments. They'll all 
 decide, you know, that you're better off without your husband than 
 with him, if you can keep the kiddies dressed and fed; and, upon my 
 word ! if you realize how the one occupation of their men is standing 
 in the streets and betting — well, on whether the next woman that 
 looks out of a window has her hair in papers or not — that's how their 
 money goes — you wonder if their wives aren't right. She'd not 
 know what to say if they asked her opinion. And suppose a drunk 
 lady wanted to fight her ? Drunks go there, or the police take 'em 
 there when they judge they're respectable. The police wouldn't 
 think of taking a respectable drunk woman to one of the other doss- 
 jm houses." 
 
 He heaved a great sigh of relief. 
 
 44 Well, Father, I think that's that. All the sorrier I am for having 
 
i68 
 
 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 to suggest what now I do. My job at Mr. Travers' is unfortunately 
 over; I shall have to look for a job as you yourself have pointed out. 
 And I'm anxious not to put off my marriage." He enlarged a little 
 on his gratitude for the arrangement that had held good so far. Then 
 he reminded me that he'd accompanied Lady Sophia and Barbara 
 to Linborough when Barbara went there after the funeral. 
 
 “ Lady Sophia/' he said , 44 though making no offer — for, of course, 
 she would consult you before doing that — asked me if I would like 
 her to offer me the managership of one department of her Settlement 
 in London, and if so, she would apply to you for your opinion. I 
 could live on the salary, seeing that quarters would be supplied; the 
 work would be congenial to me and to my wife, as she then, I hope, 
 would be. I should like to marry," said he (still rather pleased with 
 his accuracy of formula), 44 immediately after the Closed Season. 
 My wife would have plenty to do then, both writing and active work, 
 and we should remain in close touch with the Guild, and even 
 strengthen the links between it and the Settlement. Wishing to be 
 fully above board, I now place the matter before your Reverence, 
 and though," he said, suddenly becoming natural, 44 it'd break my 
 heart to go away from dear old Wilchurch, please God we'll be in 
 very close touch still. Father, and it looks as if I owe you an' Wil- 
 church fair everything, having obtained along of you the Faith and 
 a wife into the bargain, and a Catholic one moreover." 
 
 For Miss Silver was to be received before Christmas. 
 
 So we talked that over, and decided we would like Lady Sophia 
 to consider her exploration of avenues satisfactorily accomplished, 
 and to ask me to ask the Sergeant to ask her to ask him. 
 
 I concluded, therefore, the same night, when I came in and found 
 that Barbara and he were waiting and wanted to see me, that they'd 
 called about that. 
 
 The room was rather dark, and they were sitting with their backs 
 to the light, so I didn't see them clearly. 
 
 The Sergeant stood up. He had an evening paper in his hand. 
 
 ** I regret to say " he began, and his voice made me jump. 44 1 
 
 — perhaps you've not seen the paper — there's a bit of bad news " 
 
 I looked at Barbara more closely. 
 
 44 My dear girl," I said, going to her , 44 what's the matter ?" 
 
 She broke into a tempest of tears. I took her hands, but she 
 pulled them away. 
 
 44 Oh, never mind me /" she cried. 44 Ask him. Make him show 
 you. Be quick” 
 
i6g 
 
 • MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 She pushed me towards the Sergeant. 
 
 He showed me a paragraph. The CorporaFwas arrested on a 
 charge of murdering Nellie Smarle, somewhere in Rotherhithe. 
 He'd acknowledged it ♦ ♦ ♦ he'd sat on the head of the stairs and 
 waited, apparently, to be taken. 
 
 I couldn't assimilate that for a minute, especially as I was afraid 
 Barbara was going to be ill. 
 
 “ Go to the kitchen," I said to the Sergeant. 44 Fetch a cup of 
 tea. Nothing else. And then get a taxi." 
 
 The strain of the last few months had been quite too much for 
 her, and the crash of the enormous hopes she'd been building for the 
 Corporal had left her without any power of thinking. However, 
 she drank her tea, and we took her back to the Convent. I had 
 unlimited trust in the Reverend Mother, and I put her in safe hands. 
 
 “ It's impossible for her to sleep yet," I said, 44 or to rest. But 
 I think if you make the Stations of the Cross with her, that'll be best. 
 She'll need that. Then judge for yourself. If she needs a sleeping 
 draught, try one. And I should think a good deal of work — Christ- 
 mas work — as soon as possible. I'll wire for Lady Sophia. She'll 
 give what even you can't. Reverend Mother, and you will what she 
 can't." 
 
 “ Now," I said, when the Sergeant and I got outside again , 44 tell 
 me about all this." 
 
 The poor man was desperate. It was all his fault. Barbara was 
 at the Guild offices when the evening paper came, and the Sergeant 
 had glanced through it, and when he saw the paragraph had cried 
 out. He cursed his lack of control, for Barbara had turned round 
 and seen his face, and though he'd tried at first to prevent her reading 
 it, she knew far too well that it wasn't anything trivial, nor personal 
 to him, especially because he tried to keep the paper away. With her 
 terrible intuition, and also because, I suppose, she always had the 
 Corporal rather near her consciousness, she jumped to the conclusion 
 it was about him and that it was dreadful. So, unable to help himself, 
 and sure that he'd better be there when she read it, he handed the 
 paper over, and they had come straight round to our house, and had 
 waited an appalling hour for my return. 
 
 The morning paper added next to nothing, and after turning over 
 a number of plans for getting at the Corporal, a grotesque inspiration 
 reached me that I'd better try Cecil Calthrop. So I wired to ask 
 if I could lunch with him in London on Friday, which was the first 
 day I could possibly get away. He wired back, characteristically, 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 170 
 
 44 Right Princes Grill Room One C absolutely topping prospect see 
 you again turned down lunch adorable lady your sake come mend 
 broken heart mine I mean.” 
 
 I arrived then in London wondering how I could possibly cope with 
 Cecil Calthrop, and made my way to Prince's. 
 
 At the bottom of the stairs, the pontifical personage established 
 there asked me with contemptuous deference if I wanted a table for 
 one. I asked if Mr. Calthrop hadn't engaged one for two. Every 
 line of his face and body altered and he enquired if I meant the 
 Honourable Cecil, and I said yes, and a small army of waiters 
 appeared from nowhere and removed as much of my clothing as 
 they decently could and then escorted me to a corner table, where I 
 sat down and waited. The contrast between Prince's and Cecil, 
 and Frank, wherever he was, began to get on my nerves, when a 
 little after one a fearful commotion upstairs indicated the boy's 
 approach. 
 
 44 Sorry, sorry, sorry,” he began, pulling off his gloves, and tossing 
 his raiment right and left into expectant arms. 44 Only just up. 
 Nervous wreck. Debaucheries of the metropolis. Drinks, please. 
 Two mixed vermouths : slightly more French than Italian; and wash, 
 mind you, merely wash the glasses with gin first. And book of the 
 words, please.” 
 
 At this point he collapsed into his chair, and at last looked at me. 
 He frowned. 
 
 44 Ah,” said he. 44 Business evidently. Bad business, I'm afraid. 
 Not yet. Father. You've a little time to spare after feeding, haven't 
 you ? Let's start on oysters. Manage two dozen ? One ? right; 
 two dozen oysters natural, to push off with. Then out-of-works. 
 Friday, isn't it ? We make meagre, waiter. To be followed by 
 Soles at the female miller. Trite, but palatable. Omelette at the 
 rum flamboyant. Suit you. Father ? Mushroom savoury. And 
 drinks ? not fizzy ♦ Ostentatious at lunch and unsuitable to Advent. 
 White, anyway. No. 122, please. Ah ! Admire the brown bread 
 and butter. They know how I like it cut: a mere film. Difficult 
 to hold, but the only way. . . .” 
 
 He prattled continuously during the meal and stopped me when 
 I tried to talk of what I'd come for. 
 
 44 The Corporal ?” he asked. 44 Of course it is. No need to tell 
 me. Eat, there's a good man. And don't talk till coffee.” 
 
 Coffee came, and he looked with distaste at the liqueur-list. 
 
 44 Cura^oa,” he said, 44 even with half brandy, would be cloying 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 171 
 
 after that lunch. Either pure brandy, or I think, since we've had 
 no sweets, Allasch. They have a couple of bottles left, which they 
 keep for me. Know Allasch ?" 
 
 “ Kummel, isn't it ?" I said. 
 
 “ Tut," said he. 44 This is the real stuff. Hummel's crystal and 
 emeralds looking through it; the really real Allasch is diamonds, 
 emeralds, and a flash of genuine sapphires in it. . ♦ . Now then, 
 what's the matter ?" 
 
 I told him in outline. 
 
 He said 44 Aha," and brooded. 
 
 I said : 44 I thought your father would perhaps get us on to some- 
 body. I want to know where Frank is; and I want to communicate 
 with him at once; and, in fact, see him; and I don't want a warder 
 present; and if there has to be one, I want it to be conveyed to him 
 unofficially that he's to be out of earshot. I've had too much of 
 talking to prisoners on opposite sides of a table with a warder at the 
 end of it. With Frank Newnes it would be fatal. Here's a name or 
 two," I added, pushing a list across to him , 44 which I thought might 
 be useful." 
 
 He read it, put it to one side, and meditated till his cigarette went 
 out. 
 
 Then he said: 
 
 44 Dearest papa's no good. He doesn't like me just now. And 
 anyhow he wouldn't." 
 
 He thought again. Then he roused himself. 
 
 44 Paper l" he cried, and the waiter, Heaven knows whence, pro- 
 duced quite a lot. 
 
 He wrote a number of messages. 
 
 44 Get those off quick," he said. 44 Make sure of the car first, 
 and the one to Mr. Penruddock. Teddy Penruddock's the best we 
 can do," he said to me. 44 Frightful rip, but an Ai Catholic at heart. 
 Run round with him a lot, but always say good-night at a certain 
 moment. I've told him to be in at all costs from 3 p.m. on. Else 
 he may be resting between lunch and cocktail time. He'll get us 
 through to Sir Hubert, and he will to Eck and Ecclesleigh, and if he 
 can't do what we want, no one can." 
 
 44 I know Hughie Eck," I said. 
 
 44 Aha ! Well, he's as good a papist as they make 'em, though 
 orthodox. He and your Sergeant'd make a good couple." 
 
 He remained drumming with his fingers on the table, till, after a 
 very short time really, the waiter announced the car. 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 172 
 
 It was bright purple, and torpedo shaped, and after we'd lain down 
 in it, it shot away at nerve-wracking speed towards the Embankment* 
 
 It was easy to find where the Corporal was, and we then turned 
 back into Whitehall* 
 
 44 What a life !" Cecil lamented* And he gave me an outline of 
 his doings lately. “Absolutely shattering to the nervous system: 
 Sanatogen the only thing* Absolutely flattened out, I am*" He began 
 to murmur a sort of hymn to Sanatogen, and with the fantastic 
 perversity of a day large parts of which have absolutely vanished 
 from my memory, the rhymes fixed themselves maddeningly in my 
 brain* 
 
 “ Sanatogen ! the latter men are flatter then ? What matter when 
 Sanatogen is there to make 'em fat again 1 Sanatogen ! A cat or 
 hen, a rat or wren will thrive upon Sanatogen ! Sanatogen 1 The 
 Upper Ten grow sane upon Sanatogen* ♦ ♦ ♦" A policeman held 
 out his arm* We halted under it* 44 Oh batter scatter shatter men, 
 but leave me my Sanatogen 1" said Cecil to the policeman, w T ho 
 nearly arrested us as lunatics* 
 
 The subsequent interviews were at least a nightmare, and sanity 
 seemed not to return till we went to Lord Eck's room* His huge 
 serenity forced into shape the situation, which the mask of im- 
 becility donned by Mr* Penruddock, and Sir Hubert's champing 
 annoyance, had driven quite out of my grasp* 
 
 It was scarcely four when the purple car, ghostly now in the 
 shadows and hectic under the lights, glided southwards once again* 
 
 The prison loomed up, an absurd, cynically decorative, castle, 
 cruelly different from the rigorous paint, plaster, and steel of its 
 interior. 
 
 44 1 won't come in," said Cecil* 44 Hughie's letter's good enough* 
 I'd contribute nothing; they might conceivably think me cheeky* 
 I'll buzz round," he added, 44 to a convent or two. Get the nuns 
 busy, and some kiddies on to it, what ? Now don't you talk. Father* 
 Less you say, the better, I reckon." 
 
 He pulled his great bowler off, and waited, vivid in the headlights, 
 with his purple overcoat, his black and white check tie and trousers, 
 and his bronze-purple socks and soft brown shoes* 
 
 I knew he wanted my blessing* I gave it, and he returned to 
 dance on the tightrope of his temperament over the gulf of London* 
 
 After another interview, I was taken down to a room I knew 
 already* I loathed its sea-green walls, with their chocolate dado, 
 edged with orange* 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 173 
 
 44 I'll go and give instructions, sir/' said the warder* “ I trust 
 you to be tactful* And should he be a bit light-headed, look to me*" 
 “ Oh; trust me*" I said* “ And he'll be all right after the first 
 minute or two*" 
 
 After a quarter of an hour he returned with Frank, who already 
 had the prisoner's cowed way of not looking at things* When he 
 saw me he became quite grey and steadied himself by the table* 
 The warder watched him carefully* 
 
 I took his hands and said, 44 Hullo, Frank*" 
 
 He licked his lips* 
 
 44 Hullo* Found me, 'ave you ?" 
 
 44 Sure* This was the first day I could get down*" 
 
 44 Seen it in the papers, I reckon ?" 
 
 44 Sergeant saw it !" I said, smiling* 
 
 “ Huh ! Sergeant ! Through with me, I reckon, ain't he ?" 
 
 44 No more than I am*" 
 
 Then at last he studied me, and his hands in mine became 
 alive* 
 
 44 It's really you, wot's come ?" 
 
 44 Of course it is* Who else ? Me, right enough*" 
 
 He coughed, and sat down on the edge of the table, still watching 
 my eyes carefully, and with his lips compressed* Then: 
 
 “ I done it, you know," he said* 
 
 The warder, who was just going down the room, halted nervously* 
 “ With these hands," said the boy, looking at them almost, you'd 
 have said, as strange to him* So I held them harder till the physical 
 sensation cut across his thought* 
 
 Then I sat down beside him on the table, and the warder went quite 
 to the end of the room* 
 
 “ Know where I'm feeling myself to be ?" 
 
 " Where ?" 
 
 44 'Ospital* But you wait* Better nor that* Years an' years 
 be'ind the 'ospital* Couldn't call me Corporal, you couldn't* Kid, 
 if you choose* Reg'lar kid. I'm become* Kiddie Newnes* But 
 kid in 'ospital* Because 'ospital was where I knew you, see ? Knew 
 me in 'ospital, you did; but never me as kid* Yet that's me now* 
 So — me, kid; and us, in 'ospital, see ?" 
 
 I began to see* 
 
 44 'Ospital first," he went on ; 44 'ow's all the boys ?" 
 
 44 Hallinan's happy," I said* “ I heard from them; sort of pre- 
 Christmas good wishes* Taffy's happy* Still gardening in Scotland* 
 
MR, FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 174 
 
 No relapse* Very few of the men are the same* None in your 
 ward* Filled up with ex-soldiers of the county regiments mostly/' 
 44 An' Sergeant ? You mentioned Sergeant ?" 
 
 44 He's getting married ! He's settling down in London* He 
 sends you his love*" 
 
 “ Huh ! Never nothing but settled/' said he, smiling, 44 wasn't 
 Sergeant* His love, did he ?" and he broke off, meditating* 
 
 44 So did Miss Barbara," I said, rather anxious about what he'd 
 recollect* But his mind went straight back behind the Fair to her 
 first Christmas visit, two years ago now, all but a very few days* 
 
 44 'Er love ?" he repeated* 44 An' me ready to kiss 'er shoes, and 
 always was* Sun, moon, an' stars, she was, says Private Snell, and 
 I ain't forgotten it* Right for once, was Snell* Wot'll you say to 
 'er from me ?" 
 
 44 I'll say you thank her for it, and that you'll keep remembering 
 it, and that she can trust you* Her father died quite lately, and she 
 wants friends she can rely on*" 
 
 He looked at me, feeling himself again, and smiled wryly* 
 
 44 That's for 'ospital," said he* 44 But be'ind all that 'ave I gone* 
 Call me kid if it pleases you* Dreamin' dreams, I am, of where I'd 
 like to go to* Always restless, as a kid, an' if it hadn't been for 
 London, there'd be nowhere I 'adn't seen by now* Guessed it all, 
 I did* Guessed it, an' then the advertisements* Canada* Snow, 
 and nothin' but snow, an' grey sky an' flamin' sunset* Oo ! An' 
 big boots an' furry gloves, an' me free an' drinkin' in the frost* And 
 India an' Shanghai an' deserts 1 Gold an' scarlet, an' the drums, 
 an' bells an' them queer temples an' the sunlight* Me blinkin' in 
 the sunlight* Huh ! Stretching meself naked to the heat 1 Not 
 a ounce o' flesh on me that shouldn't be* Alive all through meself ! 
 All round the world, I am, since I been in here*" 
 
 44 Was that what you always wanted ?" 
 
 44 Always something else ," said he , 44 same as you said to the Aussie, 
 or 'e told me* An' when all's said an' done, still somethin' else* 
 And," said he, 44 there'll be no London, now, to stop me 'avin' it*" 
 I didn't know how to break in on that* 
 
 He turned round, radiant* 
 
 44 There ain't no London in the way," he said* 44 There ain't 
 no shop, nor no pub, nor yet there ain't no lock upon me* Locked, 
 I was* Locked even in 'ospital* The key's turned an' out I've 
 come. Handcuffs gone; equipment gone; free as the air, inside o 9 
 my head. Free, I am." 
 
175 
 
 MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 I still wasn't sure how far he was hysterical* 
 
 44 The words you'll say to me now/' he said, 44 I can let 'em in* 
 In already if you asks me* An' I talks to God, an' I hears Tm* 
 Why not ? 'Cos there ain't no London in me 'ead, nor yet no shop, 
 nor yet no me * ♦ ♦ see wot I mean ? None of the me as was always 
 play-acting to be me; getting in 'twixt you an' the me I am, the 
 original and one and only Frank, underneath me dreams and me 
 thoughts an' the bluff an' the play-actin'; an' if it's you that's 'ere, 
 then you an' me meets proper, and I'm free to act as you bid*" 
 
 44 You believe in God ? You pray, Frank ?" 
 
 “ Huh 1 When didn't I ? Every time* Pray ? Always prayin' 
 was the me the other me had its foot on the mouth of* Christ ? 
 Far-ther, I tell you, after I done it, the 'ole world bust up round me* 
 Shell into a dug-out wasn't nothing to it* I come out of that room 
 like as if I'd been buried afore the shell come, and it blows me out 
 o' the black an' stiflin' heat into the air* An' I goes an' sits on the 
 stairs* And Christ, He comes and sits beside me* Takes me 
 'ands, 'E does, same as you do, and strokes top of me head and back 
 o' me neck, and best of all, looks at me, 'E does; into me eyes, an* 
 no sham me lookin' back* * ♦ ♦" 
 
 44 I can't live here, Frank, you know* But I'll be able to come 
 
 at intervals till — till something's settled and " 
 
 44 You make no mistake," said he* 44 Sergeant himself couldn't 
 be more settled than wot I am*" 
 
 44 Hush* I'll call on the chaplain, and explain that you're to be 
 instructed " 
 
 44 Entered meself R*C*," he interrupted* 
 
 44 Very well* He'll finish your instruction* And then I'll come 
 and receive you into the Church and give you your communion*" 
 
 “ Communion ?" he said* 44 Goin' all day to it, I am* Christ, 
 'E kisses me*" 
 
 I gave him my rosary* 
 
 “ You just keep this if you may," I said* “ I'm not quite sure* 
 Just hang on to it while possible* I'll arrange with the chaplain so 
 as to know if there's anything special happening* Do whatever 
 you're doing as hard as you can * Be quite sure you're going to 
 sleep* See ? When you go to bed, sleep * Be sure you'll sleep* 
 Without dreaming* And occupy your mind with what the chaplain 
 says* Work, and think that over coolly, and sleep when you're told 
 to* Promise?" 
 
 He laughed a little* 
 
MR, FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 176 
 
 44 You're afraid for me 'ead," he said, 44 Don't you worry. 
 That's all right. Swingin' about I am a bit, wot with one thing 
 givin' me such a shove, an' then another. But steady I am, inside. 
 Somethin' holdin' me. Don't you worry," 
 
 All the same, he quite suddenly went chalk-white. His face 
 glistened with sweat, and he caught hold of my coat, 
 
 “ You'll be with me when necessary ?" he said, 
 
 44 I promise," 
 
 44 An' you'll be thinkin' of me all the while from now on ?" 
 
 44 As far as it's humanly possible. I'll arrange for someone to be 
 thinking of you all the time. Kiddies or nuns or someone , In the 
 presence of our Lord in the Blessed Sacrament," 
 
 44 Ah," said he, recovering, 44 1 'ave 'Im with me. Forgot, I 
 did, for a moment. Reckon 'E don't, though," 
 
 £/ So I left] him for*a while. 
 
Chapter XVIII 
 
 W HEN the due time came an arrangement was arrived at 
 and I was able to establish myself on a footing which 
 enabled me to see as much of Frank as I wished* 
 
 We used to sit side by side on his brown-blanketed bed with the 
 tiny window on our left, the door with its observation hole to the 
 right, and the blank wall opposite, three feet or so away, and nothing 
 assuredly to distract us* At other times I sat on the foot of the bed, 
 and he cross-legged at the head of it and leaning back* Sometimes, 
 when his nerves were altogether too much for him, he lay flat, though 
 he never spoke about that sort of feeling, or perhaps not more than 
 twice altogether* 
 
 This extraordinary lad had, as he said, recovered his boyishness 
 more than I'd thought possible in a man; for though he'd seemed 
 at first of the sort that seems destined never to grow old, and then 
 does quite suddenly, it wasn't a boy's look that had flashed in his 
 squirrel's eyes, but either the rather dreadful air of a clever animal, 
 that might claw you suddenly, or, an exhausting experience which 
 had aged him more, by far, than any years could* 
 
 But now, his eyes shone rather than flashed, and he kept breaking 
 into the most gentle and bewildering smiles, even when he said 
 what you'd have thought to be dictated by despair* To tell the 
 truth, he had despaired long ago and comprehensively of himself 
 and the whole of the gifts of life* 
 
 The first time we had met under the new conditions, he said, 
 looking at me out of the corner of his eyes : 
 
 44 Funny how we've both of us got our way 1" 
 
 44 Have we ?" 
 
 44 Me bein' able to see as much of you as I want, an' all to meself*" 
 44 It's odd how little we ever have seen of one another at all 
 comfortably*" 
 
 “ Oo, didn't I hate old Sergeant when he first come ! Absorbin' 
 you like, when I wanted you settin' on me bed same as before* 
 Always yappin' to Sergeant, an' religion into the bargain*" 
 
 177 
 
 12 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 178 
 
 “ I think I used to come as much as before* And I always used 
 to go to dozens of others, anyhow* And it was a long time before 
 you and I made what I call real acquaintance*” 
 
 44 Ho ! An" didn't I hate you them first weeks after the first 
 time of all, when you wouldn't come*” 
 
 44 I didn't want to thrust myself on you !” I said, smiling at a 
 memory* 
 
 44 I knew that, for sure* But I'd kid meself you was offended 
 by what I said first time — remember that ? Them was my cheeky 
 days* When I sees you marchin' down the ward, black an' 'oly, 
 and sticks me head up an' shouts , 4 Does Jesus love me ? Ah-men,' 
 an' you nips round and collars me hard by the ear, an' says, grinnin', 
 but lookin' at me like gimlets, 4 I expects 'E does, but you don't 
 sound like one of my lads* I'm a R*C* priest,' and I couldn't 
 answer nothin', swelp me ! I hadn't nothin' to say* An' you sits 
 there and fires off a string o' questions at me as though I were under 
 arrest, but grinnin' quiet, and then you 'ops it, an' fer days after 
 that you no more than nodded sharp as you went by, but grinnin', 
 an' me gettin' wild at bein' take no more notice of, till the time 
 when they was all of 'em asleep save me, an' I says for you to come 
 an' 'ave a yarn* And wasn't I ready to knife you for makin' me 
 say it first !” 
 
 44 1 felt sure you would* I always liked your wide-awake eyes, 
 Frank, and your old forelock,” I said* 
 
 “ Not much of f im left,” he said, with that detachment which 
 kept appalling me* 
 
 “ But how have I got my way ? D'you mean you accepting to be 
 taught the Catholic Faith ? Certainly I'm grateful to God for that*” 
 44 Aw* But for why do I accept it ? Remember wot you said in 
 that old church when you was starin' at that big cross 'angin' in 
 mid-air like ? 4 Reckon you've got to be brought right down,' you 
 
 says, and you repeats it, 4 right down first*' An' that was ice in my 
 veins,” said he, for the first time with a little shudder* 44 That were 
 a real — well, I mean that changed somethin'* I wouldn't let on, an' 
 kidded I was indignant with you for so much as suggesting me not 
 succeedin', see ? From then on, I knew I wouldn't* Ho ! Sure on 
 it* I foresees it all; me tumblin' down a cliff like, an' catchin' an' 
 catchin' at the twigs and the stones, an' all cornin' out in me 'ands, 
 an' breakin' off, an' me fetchin' up flat at the bottom, all me bones 
 broken* But that were a thought as went through an' went down 
 an' stayed under, somewhere in the marrow of me mind, in a manner 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 179 
 
 o' speaking an' for weeks 'e didn't come up again, though there 'e 
 was, sleepin,' an' then 'alf-wakin' an' stretchin* hisself, and growin' 
 strong* ♦ * ♦ Quite a big boy 'e become, that old thought, afore 
 'e'd 'arf done*" 
 
 “ Meanwhile, you went on pretending he didn't exist and really 
 fighting him*" 
 
 44 Fought him in this very church," said he, oddly, and feeling 
 himself actually back, I think, in the Cathedral* 44 I knew it was 
 offerin' me somethin', was this old church, as I told you, an' I says, 
 
 4 Naow / Whatever it is, I won't 'ave it* I'll 'ave me shop* I will 
 'ave that shop*' An' I did; long as I did 'ave it* * ♦ *" He sighed a 
 little* 
 
 44 When I says," he resumed , 44 that were the first occasion, I mean, 
 that's the first occasion as he went right in* But there never was a 
 time when 'e weren't floatin' around an' settlin' in a little way* Fer 
 now, Far-ther, you listen* This is it* I ain't sorry fer 'avin' been 
 brought right down, not fer this reason, if fer no other* I'm down 
 on bed-rock an' not in mid-air, an' if I sounds talkin' silly, you wait* 
 That there Cross, it 'ad the right to be in mid-air, an' if you think 
 that's sillier, you wait again, an' I'll tell you* For that's number 
 two 1" 
 
 “ Well, tell away*" 
 
 “ Well, you knows the restless lad I was, an' am, for sure* Though 
 I've give over seein' them pictures o' Canada an' such as I told 
 you on first time you come 'ere* Well, I wouldn't go right down, 
 not to nothin ' ♦ Wot do I mean ? Not to the real truth o' things, 
 not about God, not about me, not about me job, nor me pals, nor 
 girls, nor money, nor nothink* I always was some'ow cuttin' me 
 antics in mid-air an' wondering 'ow long I could stop there* For 
 why ? 'Cos I knew inside me I was 'oldin' meself up in mid-air by 
 me own teeth, in a manner o' speakin'* That's acrobats for you ! 
 Reg'lar acrobat in life, I was* 'Itchin' meself up by the seat o' me 
 own trousers an' 'an gin' myself on a peg I was sustainin' in me other 
 'and* Nonsense, any such a life is* An' lonely ! Strewth ! Never 
 nothin' else, I wasn't* But wilful to he lonely* Proud of it* But 
 perishin' from cold, to tell truth, fair starved with it*" 
 
 44 You were unlike other people, Frank; people who are 4 different ' 
 are bound to be lonely* Because of your vitality, I suppose* The 
 tremendous buck you put into things* And never went on at one 
 thing long enough to get sick of it and do it half-heartedly* Then 
 the war and your wound tired you inside your mind, as I always told 
 
i8o 
 
 MR, FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 you, though you only believed it once in a way. But when you were 
 walking about and trying for a job, and had a succession of little 
 knocks, and didn't find the success you needed, the vitality ran out, 
 and you didn't do things instinctively any more, but laboriously, 
 with definite conscious choices; and they ceased to be effective. 
 In a sense, as long as your absurd old forelock was a spontaneous 
 result of your you-ness — see ? — it was a very lovable old forelock; 
 but once you began to trade on it and try to live up to it, so to say, 
 well — that meant it had become a mere stunt. You'd ceased to have 
 the power to do your acrobatics naturally," 
 
 44 Don't you go criticizin' my forelock," said he, smiling with the 
 corners of his eyes, 44 For it was a good friend to me many a time, 
 an' I nourished it most affectionate. But 'ow can you go tickin' 
 me off for usin' my will an' not livin' on the instinck o' the moment ? 
 Weren't that the very thing you was always wishful for me to do ? 
 Get the golden thread to 'ang on to, an' not drift ? Choose strong, 
 and not be shoved ? 'Ow about old Tomlinson ?" 
 
 He suddenly doubled himself up on the bed and clutched his 
 head, but rose up quickly, though with his face haggard, 
 
 44 I were thinkin' of them rides in the chair an' the movies," said 
 he, deprecatingly, 44 an' them old tea-rooms, an* you an' me. But 
 huh ! Wot's the matter with this ? Ain't this you'n me, same as 
 ever ? An' samer," 
 
 44 Well, I think, using your will and thinking was necessary. But 
 I also think its first effect would be to bring you down a lot. It's 
 a blood-curdling thing, at first, to see right through one's self and 
 one's life. And that will or no will, one can't manage life. And that 
 the only thing one has a chance of managing is one's inside soul; 
 and that you can't manage that, alone. Grip yourself grimly 
 together into some sort of shape, you can, or for a while you can. 
 But you know that life needs more than grimness; and besides, you 
 may come to hate the shape, hate your success and your will — for 
 what's it for ? If my success is useless, why succeed ?" 
 
 “ Ar, don't touch on that side o' things. Wastin' precious time. 
 For I'm not doin' that no more, I went right down on the pavement 
 an' there I lay, an' the walkers trampled over me to an' fro; but God, 
 f E looked down through the gas-light and 'twas my eyes and 'Is , , ♦ 
 starin' at one another; an' I blinks a bit; an' I screws me own up 
 tight, and then blink again, an' then — " he laughed outright — 44 I 
 winks; winks back. Wink of recognition like. Recognize a pal. 
 For I were *appy, lyin' under the 'oofs an' the boots, an' God's eyes 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 181 
 
 on mine* But p'raps I'm goin' a bit too fast * * * 'twasn't till 
 quite the end, an' after the end, as I knew that, an' kept me own 
 eyes steady* ♦ ♦ *" 
 
 * * * * * 
 
 Another time he said: 
 
 “ Wot's queer about me is this* I seem to 'ave jumped right onto 
 the things you wanted me to jump onto without seein' 'ow I got 
 there* 'Ere I am, an' nothing'll push me off* But 'ow I got there, 
 'oo knows ? I sees in a manner 'ow I got down, I don't mean down 
 to doin' what I never thought I would do nor could, for I never 
 wanted to 'urt no one, not to say *urt ; but down to the solid; down 
 out o' mid-air : down to where God is and meself* But Jesus Christ ? 
 Ar* 'Ow I got to 'Im, I dunno* But 'ere 'E is*" 
 
 “ He is ?" 
 
 “ Sits on me bed," said he* 
 
 I looked carefully at him; but though there was a half scared look 
 in his eyes, it wasn't an inmost scare, if I may attempt to express 
 theinexpressible, nor a fear of that Presence itself, but the little scare 
 that comes with all puzzlement, and he was puzzled how the un- 
 mistakable Christ had come there* 
 
 “ Sits on me bed," he said* ** An' walks about in the yard with 
 me* Doesn't talk; but 'E eats and 'E drinks in me bowl; an' 'E 
 'olds me hands, same as you do* But don't you go for to be proud," 
 he said, smiling , 44 'cos you're a ghost compared to wot '£ is*" 
 
 I said the only thing that came into my head* 
 
 “ I can't think what it must have meant to you, being so lonely, 
 and proud of being lonely* Because you've always wanted friends* 
 How defiant you were, Frank, longing for friendship and always 
 pushing it off*" 
 
 " 'Fraid o' bein' 'ooked," said he, smiling again* 44 Now I meant 
 to 'ook you, sure thing; resolved upon it; but you me ? 
 Not you, not in these days* But sure, a 'eart for me friends 'ave 
 I got, an' went nearest to gettin' 'em when I chummed up with two 
 as got killed as I told you on* See ? Nearly got it, but didn't last* 
 An' never 'avin' 'ad no parents * * * Mentioned me sister, didn't 
 I ? Well, she never weren't no sister; leastways 'arf sister* Who 
 me father was, I dunno* An' after me, me mother goes wrong and 
 disappears* Streets, I 'spects* And so they 'ates me, an' I'm give 
 over to a 'ome, after a bit, but I were a little devil, for sure, and I 
 done a getaway; an' when I looks in, on and off, to see my sister, 
 she don't want me, an' she marries, and when you told me I'd 'ave 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 182 
 
 to look after 'er, I nearly told you this wot I'm teilin' now; but, well, 
 I shut meself up just then and there, some'ow bein' wishful you 
 should not think me quite on me lonesome, but with something to go 
 back to or to fit into. But never fit into nothin', I didn't." 
 
 “ But you fell in love, Frank, I'm sure, and soon. You told me 
 you really had — once." 
 
 44 An' that's another odd thing," said he. 44 For at not quite 
 seventeen you don't think for a lad to be able to fall in love proper. 
 But I never was no particular age. O' course I'd 'opped around a 
 lot afore that; tried most things; but didn't bite, none o' that. But 
 — call it kid's love, if you like ; kid's love is real. Leastways mine was. 
 An' then she spoils it; see ? Makes me lose me 'ead with 'er. 
 *Nuff said. After that it weren't no good. All the beauty gone; 
 all the fields withered, if you follows me, just the same as the rest. 
 An', not to exonerate meself, 'twas 'er fault, take it all in ail. Not 
 mine. She done the withering." 
 
 44 Did that harden you ?" 
 
 44 True for you. Nothin' special, afore then, I wasn't. Quite 
 gentle, I was, an' a bit of a dreamer, though 'oppin' round like mad. 
 But then I blossoms out ! Then I becomes Kid Newnes as they all 
 on 'em knew of. An' all goes down before me. One job after 
 another, and one girl after another; quick change and howlin' 
 success, every time. And then; ar ! Now this is it, I reckon. I 
 fall in love again ! Properly in ♦ Gertie, 'er name was." 
 
 Now he looked really scared. 
 
 44 I ain't remembered this since. Leastways I reckon I always 
 remembered it, but think of it I would not. The devil he gets into 
 me. Nice girl she was, and real lovin' too. An' just when all's 
 goin' well, I says sudden to meself, Now it's my turn. I'll spoil it, 
 tins time. Til do the witherin." 
 
 He narrated the tragic episode, insisting, with extreme horror in 
 his voice, that his pleasure had been to see the girl wilt and refuse to 
 believe it when he said deliberately that he'd had enough of her 
 company, and was through with her. 
 
 44 She hung on to me, she did, sayin', 4 You don't mean it, Frank ? 
 You'd never do it ?' But I laughs light, an' I says I'd been tryin' 
 an experiment, and I goes off, screamin' red rage at meself, for that 
 was the only real murder I ever done, an' 'twas a double one, on 'er 
 an' on me own love. For I loved her, and murdered me love 
 deliberate. Now no man couldn't do that, left to 'imself. There- 
 fore, 'twas the devil in me. And after that, hard i Huh 1 Steel 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 183 
 
 wire, I was, all through me; steel wire an' whipcord* Till you comes 
 an' makes a ravin' maniac of me, very near, in 'ospital*" 
 
 “ A raving maniac ?" I said, smiling* 
 
 44 Feeling meself meltin'; failin' into shreds* Bein' pulled to 
 shreds* Not by you, but by God and Christ, I reckon, but it were 
 you as made it impossible for me to keep away from 'em, you an' 
 the Sergeant and that Aussie*" 
 
 “ Chiefly Jock*" 
 
 44 Gawd 1" he said , 44 that Jock ! * * * " 
 
 “ Now," he said , 44 I'll tell you all you wants to know about Nellie 
 Smarle*" 
 
 “ Nothing you don't want to tell*" 
 
 44 Ar* I'd always tell wot's worth telling* Well, that shop* I 
 told you I had me teeth into that shop* It were that or nothing* 
 Leastways, that, suicide, or you* And by you, I mean that old 
 Church an' God* Well, I did not act crook by that shop, nor by 
 them as I borrowed off, whatever they may say* If it 'adn't been for 
 the boiler bustin' an' ruinin' arf the 'ouse and me stock; an' a mad 
 whim I 'ad to give a present to a girl wot was down and out, for to 
 get to 'Uddersfield where 'er home was which I didn't ought to 'ave 
 done, mi still owing; an' that pal o' mine wot I was at Brighton with, 
 askin' sudden for 'is money, which bein' a pal I thought I 'ad to 
 pay first; well, but for that an' trade bein' rotten an' prices 'igh an' 
 fish bein' a gamble anyways. I'd 'ave been there still* But when all 
 that ker-lapsed, I really was down an' out meself* For why ? 'Adn't 
 got nothin', and no spirit to get it* An' I was down Eltham way, one 
 time, makin' wot I could on the edge of a fair there an' ready to pick 
 pockets, so desperate was I, when that there Nellie Smarle she sees 
 me; an' now this is where I feels shy," said he unexpectedly* 
 
 44 Oh, well; don't," I said* 
 
 “ There's no way o' puttin' it but one," he said* 44 She developed 
 a passion for me, see ? Takes 'em like that sudden, at times, specially 
 'er sort* Fell in love with me plonk * Determined on it* An' offers 
 me a billet in 'er show; Orgies she always 'ad; and 'ad the option of 
 them Gondolas if she could but put down the needful* But put it 
 down she could not, not bein' able also to pay the men to work 'em; 
 so corner me she did* Sees I'm starvin'; sees I'll work without pay 
 for me grub; nets me — talk of 'ookin ' ! Offers me the job, the grub, 
 the bunk, an' 'er lovin' 'eart into the bargain* And then she can 
 manage the premium for them Gondolas* So mopped up I was* 
 And that were not the worst*" 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 184 
 
 " What was ?" 
 
 44 Made a mess o' things, in a sense, you did ," he said, reflectively* 
 
 44 Bottled me up so long, you did, though not exactly that, but 
 forcing me to bottle meself up, that I breaks out in a way I 'ates to 
 think on; for I falls in love with 'er, in a 'ideous way* 'Ates it, I do, 
 when I thinks on it* Yet so it were* And I loves and I 'ates; and 
 I meets you at the Fair, an' you drives me frantic, an' the moment 
 comes when after the Gondolas went bust — for make money on 'em 
 I could not — and in the winter, well, there was 'er an' me in that filthy 
 room at Rotherhithe, for stick to me she would, spite of all, and tho* 
 scared of me and 'ating me like 'ell, and me 'er, and well, I comes 
 'ome desperate, and she taunts me, an' she ridicules you, an' she says 
 I'm spittin' in your face each time I comes to 'er and that she's wiped 
 the street with you, an' your superior ways an' your Jesus Christ, 
 an' I goes mad, real mad; I sees you, 'er, Gertie and me shop an' the 
 Church an' all simultaneous, an' I takes 'er by the 'air, arid I — but 
 you knows the rest," he said, and then lay down quietly. 
 
 44 Is this where Our Lord begins to come in ?" 
 
 44 Sat by me on the stairs," said he, in a dream* 44 Sat by me 
 when the lodgers rushed screaming up, an' there was me, sittin' 
 waitin'* By me when the coppers come* By me at the station* 
 An' now on me bed* Sittin'* Lookin'*" 
 
 44 And you like His look ?" I asked* 
 
 He turned towards me, quite simply* 
 
 44 All bloody, 'E is* Oo ! Down an' out ? Talk of *Im l Couldn't 
 be no downer* An' thin ! An' awful eyes — deep; black all round 
 'em* Struck 'Im they 'ad* Torn at 'Is 'air* Terrible* But f E 
 don't mind* Glad, 'E is* Wouldn't want not to be* Knows as 
 I want 'Im to be down* Further down nor me* Oo ! Never none 
 so deep*" 
 
 He paused* The afternoon had darkened, and no sky shone 
 through the window* Only through the door, the light that forbade 
 the very nights to be fully dark, put reflections on the walls and the 
 ceiling. It was good to be thus stripped; bare wall, bare walls and 
 roof and floor; the bed to sit on; a pail — that was all* And a silence 
 that you know was silence, because of the rare low sounds that came 
 across it — long sighs from the town far off, very distant whistles, moans 
 of motor 'bus and tram; and within the building, the echo of the echo 
 of a footfall, or a man moving somewhere* * * * Long since, in the 
 summer evening, all gold and amethyst, sounds had thus stolen up, 
 fused sounds of cries and songs, very distant, into the house where 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 185 
 
 Reggie Orwylstree had been offering his crucifixion, and had 
 ransomed Blake; sounds, pale lights, floating shadows — the world 
 floated and the noises sighed themselves out, and the lights became 
 shadows. What was there, save he and I ? He, I, and the Man 
 of Sorrows sitting there, suffering me to hold the hands He held, 
 and watch the face into whose eyes He looked, the quiet face, the 
 eyes too calm for tears, the eyes held steady by those other eyes, too 
 deep, too penetrating for the blood and grime to blind them, un- 
 fathomable eyes, eyes of Christ that contained the knowledge of all 
 that was in man, 
 
 Jock, long ago, through a Christmas night, I, and the most Blessed 
 Sacrament, , ♦ , 
 
 To-night, Christ, I, and Frank between us; Christ round us; we, 
 in Christ; I trying to see through Christ's eyes; Frank reading him- 
 self in Christ's eyes, Christ watching Himself dawn in Frank's; I, 
 on the knees of my spirit, trying to understand into what mystery 
 I was admitted, 
 
 >jc jjc 
 
 Another time he said : 
 
 44 Told you I'd have rejoined the army, if it hadn't been for me 
 leg. I've been having pictures again; but not of the fancy places 
 I was for travellin' to. Real places; places I been to, Yardley 
 Camp an' trainin'. Good, it were. Real honest; real friendly. 
 Nearest I been to friendship, ♦ ♦ ♦ Picked up them two pals at 
 Yardley, Nothin' very special, wasn't Yardley, save for them. 
 Not harder nor I'd known, afore. Mysterious like, on and off, when 
 you peered into wot's cornin', at night; France, trenches, guns, bein' 
 killed. But even them visions, not dreadful. Over the top, 'atin' 
 it, yet pal with pal, Fer the sake of somethin', you didn't know wot, 
 but oh ! somethin ' l doin' somethin' at last, somethin' real, somethin' 
 with no riddle to it. Do your duty, an' if you cops it, you cops it. 
 An' then France, All the places, an' the little woods, an' the grey 
 mud, an' the naked stumps o' trees; an' the towns be'ind, an' the 
 drunks an' the red lamps an' all; sure, all of it l 'Uman nature in 
 the raw; lookin' at itself and its memories and 'opes from over the 
 world's edge, Oo ! The edge o' the world, and us over it," 
 
 44 It's grass again, Frank, Grass and flowers, and the lines just 
 visible, and the holes all but filled. And silence and sunlight, and 
 birds, ♦ , 
 
 44 There was birds then," he said, reflecting ; 44 but that was cruel* 
 Crueller than the gunfire. Mad, they sounded," 
 
1 86 
 
 MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 “ D'you know what I feel ?" I said* 44 It was so much more real 
 then — so much more of reality was pumped into those places, than 
 there is now, that what you see now isn't what's really there* It's 
 all there, now, the terrific human emotions pumped into that soil — 
 the frightful human experiences gone through there, and so incom- 
 parably beyond anything else that ever happens there or has or will 
 happen, that when one goes back there, one has no right to be 
 conscious of anything else*" 
 
 He smiled whimsically* 
 
 44 There's not many that'd want to be there twice, for all that," 
 he said* “ Save in the way I goes*" 
 
 44 I think we go almost in the same way* I thought I'd never 
 reconcile myself to not being there while it was going on; but there 
 was a lot of curiosity and selfishness in that* * * ♦" 
 
 44 And you'd not 'ave met me," he broke in* 
 
 44 No* And I can honestly feel myself in communion with it* 
 The not having sights and sounds doesn't really matter* The spirit 
 is there, spirit good and bad, but, whatever they say, good inside the 
 bad, in the cursing and hating and madness* And nothing inter- 
 feres with the communion of spirit with that spirit. And there was 
 more there, to be in communion with, than ever anywhere, perhaps*" 
 44 An' I goes round and round through them old places," he con- 
 tinued, 44 an' I remembers this and that, an' I am there, and more 
 there nor I was, and in the souls of 'em I am, of me two pals, of me 
 mates, me fellow corporals, me officers, that was goin' through things 
 they've forgotten, things wot they never understood; but doin' 
 things inside, bein' things, as never they guessed, nor will do, till 
 they wakes up an' sees 'ow Christ was along with 'em, even in all 
 that, even in the 'orrors, an' the beastliness* Blood from 'ead to foot, 
 'E were, an' mud; but with 'eaven in 'is eyes, like as 'E is now* An' 
 don't you call that no mere mush* If that ain't true, nothin' ain't* 
 When'll I make my Communion ?" 
 
 There was little left to teach him; nothing to prevent his Com- 
 munion, and little time for anything* 
 
 So I received him into the Holy Catholic Church, absolved him 
 from the past, and gave him the bread of immortality* 
 
 * * * * * 
 
 From this time on, he lived from Communion to Communion, 
 and received Our Lord daily. At last, I told him I'd spend the next 
 night with him, leaving him only to say my Mass and to bring back 
 the Blessed Sacrament* The night was calm; we said the whole 
 
MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 187 
 
 Rosary, and recalled a strange mingling of his life in hospital and of 
 the life of Jesus* Then he slept* He was still sleeping when I 
 prepared to go to say my Mass* I woke him, to the scandal of the 
 warder, who had wished him to sleep as long as possible* But I 
 knew he would want to keep watch on Christ's Calvary, as Christ* 
 now for so many days, had kept him company on his own* 
 
 I had already heard his confession during the night* He made it 
 general once more, and offered the mixed chalice of his life to God, 
 that He might transubstantiate it into a blood fit for the associated 
 Sacrifice* 
 
 When I came back he made acts of Faith, Hope, and Charity* 
 44 Oh, my God, I believe* * * ” 
 
 Illusions faded, falsehood fallen away* Reality gazing upon him, 
 the substance of things hitherto invisible* The man who had willed 
 to have none of that, who had so obstinately denied, welcomed the 
 truth now and went to it* 
 
 Oh, my God, I believe* 
 
 And oh, my God, I hope * * * all that is in me of ignorance 
 asking to be taught; of emptiness, waiting to be filled; of loneliness, 
 asking for its friends; all of it, all of me, hopes for what now I all 
 but grasp; what has come, now, so very near; what needs no struggle, 
 now, from my exhaustion, to lay hold on* I hope * * ♦ 
 
 And oh, my God, I love l I love with all my heart; my heart that 
 couldn't find, couldn't know, once, what to love, couldn't tell save 
 that it wanted to love, and poured its love out onto the mocking 
 idol, the distorted symbol of Thyself* For Thee always, under- 
 neath the image, my heart meant to love, pitifully betrayed by the 
 very symbol that so earnestly offered Thee to me* But now, the 
 image is done with; finished, the symbol; and my heart can say it 
 loves Thee* * * ♦ 
 
 So, oh my God, I love* 
 
 Corpus Domini Nostri Jesu Christi * * * The Body of Our Lord 
 Jesus Christ * * * 
 
 A body, weak and broken as my own was, and is to be, what can 
 that do for me ? My body, so misused, so offered in the sacrifice 
 of sin, can that be helped ? Weil, You, too, have a body; You, too, 
 are a man; You came all the way down * * * You know * * * * I 
 come to You, I, still able to offer You my body, not fearing to; You 
 understand* You take it* And now that I have finished with it, I 
 leave it and its history alone; I don't attend to it* But my soul, 
 Jesus ; my mind that still has its horrible hour before it passes 
 
i88 
 
 MR. FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 into the life that no one can tamper with ♦ ♦ ♦ Will you help 
 that ? 
 
 Custodiat animam tuam : 
 
 I will mount sentinel, O soul, above you. I will mount guard. 
 And I will guard you, not from outside you. Not from far off, I 
 am within you; I am soul's soul for you. I am Life; I am your life. 
 You can never die. 
 
 In vitam seternam : Unto eternal life. 
 
 Amen. 
 
 * * * * * 
 
 Many Masses were said for him that day, else it would have been 
 
 intolerable not to offer the prevailing Sacrifice forthwith, in those 
 very walls. But on the next day the Catholics were allowed to 
 attend the Requiem in their chapel, a dingy chapel, with mean walls 
 washed pale colours, stencilled with monograms, and harshly lit. 
 Two poor statues stood there; the Sacred Heart and Mary; and over 
 the Altar, Christ hung between two thieves. 
 
 But the better for that poverty, the tremendous Mystery revealed 
 itself, undisguised by anything not itself, offered to souls undistracted 
 by any rival claim. 
 
 I knew how they knelt there, men tired at daybreak, heads thrown 
 back, eyes closed, lips parted, forgetting for a moment the unceasing 
 watch, the imminent necessity, the relentless round; or, with eyes 
 held fixed by the twin tapers ; or, with head huddled down on folded 
 arms, shoulders bowed with the huge weight life had laid on them. 
 
 Here, too, what the sight offered became unsubstantial and thin; 
 all this world's lights went out; across the lattice of its illusions looked 
 forth the grave eyes of God whom even now, perhaps, they didn't 
 understand, whom even now their will was weak for loving ; the 
 manner of whose service, they could not now foresee. But faith 
 flickered there timid, yet unextinguished, in the winds of their 
 thought, in the mist of their dreams ; hope lifted up hands faint from 
 the long effort to close on nothingness; love, too, was there, a certain 
 warmth; a peace. 
 
 But already, at the Altar's foot, the priest stood, and bowed him- 
 self straightway with the worshippers, shouldering his sins; heaving 
 on to his shoulders all their sins. He beat his breast. 
 
 Confiteor : Lord, I confess ! By my fault; my great, great fault. 
 He drew it all to him, all the whole world's sin, for there is but one 
 Altar and one Mass in all the world, and into it all the world is 
 gathered. 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 189 
 
 Gathered there, then, were all those friends, the unforgetting 
 friends, warned of that hour of sacrifice, and kneeling at Altar- 
 stairs that mounted, in reality, towards this self-same Mass, this 
 huge Mass that outstripped time and space; hither, unguessing it, 
 rolled the effort and the anguish of the great city so near by, of 
 England, of the world, and of the hidden world that sent souls 
 flocking round the universal offering* 
 
 The priest mounted the steps, and read the Introit* Requiem, 
 Domine ; Rest, Lord, we ask for these tired folks ; Requiem dona ; 
 the free gift of rest — we cannot earn it ! Requiem eeternam ; eternal 
 rest; for this brief respite will not do for them* Their work re- 
 begins, work so futile, toil how vain I Te decet hymnus, Deus, in 
 Sion * Song were befitting thee, Lord, in Thy Holy Heaven; but 
 these souls are too tired, perhaps, to sing; they prefer to ask Thy 
 mercy, eleison ; and again and again, they ask it, eleison ! Christe, 
 Kyrie, eleison l 
 
 The priest lifts praying hands, and from all the flocking souls, one 
 name is singled out: Thy servant Francis; out of all the centuries, all 
 the flocking millions, one name is called* O Creator! O Redeemer! 
 Thy servant Francis* * * ♦ For all these souls, still toiling; for all 
 those souls out there, whose work is over, who have no more work, 
 nor sin, but in whom the wounds of work and sin still call Thy healing; 
 but for him, too, most of all to-day, Thy servant Francis, for whom 
 the day we all have to expect is come* * * * This is his day, dies 
 ilia * * * ♦ That day, for him, is to-day, and was it all of wrath ? 
 His book has been brought forth, his v/hole life read through to Thee; 
 his whole life, all of it, and therefore, O Just Judge, surely how much 
 of good, of innocence, of joyousness, of kindness, and of loneliness 
 — how much that may be argued ! Yet not he, nor I, will argue; not 
 I assess — O quid dicturus ? Not I can judge; I am not Judge* King 
 of appalling Majesty, Salvation is Thy gift, Thy gift* Not we put 
 mercy into Thee; Thou art its Fountain; from Thee flows forth 
 Salvation; from Thee, the Saviour; from Thee, Jesus* You speak, 
 Jesus ! remember on his behalf what we don't even know; remember 
 on my behalf what even I, your servant Francis, shutting my eyes 
 to all else, do know — recordare l That You travelled far to seek me; 
 You, too, were tired; You came, You didn't hesitate; You came into 
 the horrible room; You came and You sat beside me on the stairs; 
 You sat on my bed; You kept with me * * * You had Your gallows, 
 too* Tantus labor ! O tantum atque talem Redemptorem I It can't 
 have all been wasted* Magdalen You absolved; to the thief You 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 190 
 
 promised Paradise; and to me, You gave hope * ♦ * better than 
 hope; You gave yourself; You were my friend; already, it was 
 enough* 
 
 And in the Gospel, Jesus Himself spoke, reassuring the soul 
 unable to believe in its own comradeship* Yes, I have come* Yes, 
 I am here* It's no dream, it's no mere promise, even* I am 
 Resurrection* I am Life ; you possess me, my Real Presence, and 
 though you be dead, you live* 
 
 And the Priest offers the Bread and Wine, one Bread of many 
 grains, one cup of mingled drops, the water of our weak humanity 
 deluged in God's strong wine, eternal life from the immortal vine, 
 Life deluging our dying; and of His Divinity we are made partakers, 
 who in our Humanity did not disdain to share* 
 
 The bell, cool drops upon fevered souls, announcing that the 
 Thrice Holy, the Infinite and Ineffable, must also by us be named 
 thrice blessed, since He has come so near as to stand, see, at our very 
 doors; Himself, no more now theme of hymn or scripture, nor yet 
 a memory, however precious, of a distant Palestine recalled across 
 slow centuries, but at our doors, our own doors, these prison doors* 
 Not they can keep Him out; the barriers fall* And again, the 
 eager bell; and again, and He is here* You are here, You are lifted 
 up; we see You; you are lifted, and are drawing all men, all of us, 
 to Yourself* Jesus Christ, between earth and heaven, as he saw 
 You himself, both earth and heaven; making the two, one; in Your- 
 self, making them one, and in Yourself, ourselves* Stooping, 
 ascending, coming down, all the way down, down to Your servant 
 Francis; and lifting him up, and us, since You, too, are lifted back* 
 You have ascended to the God whom w T e, as You do, we, priest and 
 people, brothers and sisters of Yourself, now name Our Father* 
 
 Pater Noster ♦ 
 
 God's Lamb ! What did You do with sin, when You took it 
 away ? You took it on Yourself, into Yourself, and it died* You 
 died of it Yourself, and we have to die of it; and yet it wasn't death, 
 since death itself couldn't kill You, who are Life; and we share Your 
 life and have died to no more than death* Finished, our struggle; 
 over, the restlessness; give us Your peace, eternal rest in You* 
 
 For not alone in His arms are we embraced; with Him we are 
 incorporate; our effort, the long ache and strain of the whole world's 
 history mount up into this enormous act of Mass, the adequate 
 petition, the superabundant expiation, the sufficing Eucharist, the 
 full worship, on the part of creation, of its God* Cur peace, then, 
 
MR* FRANCIS NEWNES 
 
 191 
 
 is powerful; our rest, energy; we sleep, but we wake; we are in Him, 
 and He in God, and They in us* 
 
 We cannot but falter, Lord* We are not worthy* Domine, 
 Domine , Domine ; non sum dignus * But who so needy, Lord, just 
 because so unworthy ! We have proved, assuredly, our need; we, all 
 of us, who kneel still at these steps; the friends who have tried to 
 serve Thy servant Francis for Thy sake; Thy Barbara; Thy Ser- 
 geant, and the girl who with his service has loved to join her own; 
 the two lads, who learned to be Thy heroes; the boy, who in the 
 whirl of all that is not Thou, still worships Thee* And these who kneel 
 here at Thy Communion rails, sinners, but absolved, yet needing 
 Thee for the years when Man's help, alas, shall succour them how 
 little; and Thy Church and Thy world, and Thine unseen flocking 
 souls still in their Purgatory, and with them, perchance. Thy 
 servant Francis* * * * O Word of God, utter Thyself in the souls 
 of all of us, that our lives be healed. 
 
 We bow, and we, too, are lifted; Your arms lift us; to Your heart 
 you lift us; You hold us there; You stoop; v/e raise our faces, Lord; 
 and lo, Your Eyes upon our eyes; and upon our lips, Your kiss* 
 
 So that in us no trace of sin remain, whom Thy pure and holy 
 Sacrament has made Thy new Creation* 
 
 Printed in England* 
 
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