1^ u Bi A« 
 
/ 
 
 1^^ 
 
M. B. A* 
 
THE 
 
 REJECTED PICTURES, &c. 
 
 WITH 
 
 OF THE SEVERAL COMPOSITIONS 
 
 BY SOME 
 
 CI-DEVANT AND OTHER COGNOSCENTI : 
 f Being a Supplement to the Royal Academy Catalogue of 1815.) 
 
 TO WHICH ARE ADDED, 
 
 A FEW OF THE SECRET REASONS 
 FOR THEIR REJECTION, 
 
 By a distinguished Member of the Hanging Committee. 
 
 " His jocamur, ludimus, amamus, dolemus, querimur, irasclmur, describimus aiiquid 
 inodo pressiins, modo elatiis." — PLINY. 
 
 " The Devil finds some mischief still, 
 For idle hands to do," 
 
 Dr, WATTS's Hymns for Children. 
 
 LONDON: 
 
 PRINTED FOR R. S. KIRBY, 11, LONDON HOUSE YARD, 
 ST. PAUUS; 
 
 Bi/ J, GilUt, Crown Court, Fleet Street* 
 
 1815. 
 
S£trY( 
 
PREFACE. 
 
 It may not be generally known that the 
 Annual Exhibition at Somerset House never 
 contains all the subjects which have been sub- 
 mitted to the Academy. The public announce- 
 ment that Works of Art will be received con- 
 tains so few restrictions, that it produces an 
 influx which inundates every room of the 
 establishment. This may be easily accounted 
 for, when we reflect that in the preparatory 
 estimate of the merits of each competitor, the 
 artist himself, or his most intimate friends, are 
 the only judges. To prevent, therefore, the 
 unnecessary and improper exposure of works 
 
iv 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 which might be unfit for Public Exhibition, 
 and to dispose of those which shall be deemed 
 worthy of that honour, the Academy appoint a 
 certain number of their Members, to whom is 
 delegated the power of selection and arrange- 
 ment. These gentlemen, from their office, are 
 usually known by the name of the ' Hanging 
 Committee.^ 
 
 It is not to be supposed that the decisions of 
 this Committee can be always pleasing to the 
 irritable nerves of a disappointed candidate. 
 Reflections upon their judgment will be made 
 by those who are not admitted, and echoed by 
 animadversions upon their justice by those who 
 are. Envy, jealousy, and mortified vanity, 
 would certainly present their accusations 
 against these judges, even if they were not 
 artists. These complaints might be pitied, but 
 would never be listened to, if graver charges 
 had not been preferred. To mention but a 
 single instance: an existing and rival exhibition 
 could never have boasted its only piece of 
 
PREFACE. V 
 
 sculpture, that graceful and tender monument, 
 if the door of the Academy had been opened 
 wider by manly impartiality. 
 
 This fact directed the compiler of the present 
 catalogue to the subject, and, in the course of 
 his inquiry, he met with so much novel and 
 interesting matter, the articles rejected pre- 
 sented so many singular and important con- 
 siderations, either with regard to their subjects, 
 or the causes of their rejection, that having 
 failed in procuring an actual exhibition of the 
 Pictures themselves, he determined upon laying 
 a Catalogue Raisonnee" before the public. 
 
 In the recital of these productions the com- 
 piler cannot but feel regret, that a rare and 
 affecting modesty of the several artists has pre- 
 vented the addition of their names to this brief 
 memorial of their suffering merit. 
 
 Curiosity may be excited as to the means by 
 which the compiler obtained some part of this 
 
VI 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 work ; or for v^hat reason he has preferred ci- 
 devant critics to existing ones. He has only to 
 state that if there were any extraordinary cir- 
 cumstances connected with these subjects, he 
 has no motives of concealment. No breach of 
 trust was committed by him, or any improper 
 interference attempted. The smallest portion 
 of sagacity will be sufficient to discover all 
 the mystery of the affair. 
 
iBtameg of tfie ^o^mmnti 
 
 WHO HAFE CONTRIBUTED TO THE FOLLOWING WORK. 
 
 Akenside 
 
 Gilbert 
 
 ROCHEFOUCAULT 
 
 Anon. 
 
 Grimm 
 
 Shakspeare 
 
 Armstrong 
 
 Horace 
 
 Selden 
 
 Bacon 
 
 JONSON 
 
 Shenstone 
 
 Burnet 
 
 Juvenal 
 
 Spenser 
 
 BoiLEAU 
 
 Junius 
 
 St. Paul 
 
 Breton (Nicholas) 
 
 Lucian 
 
 Terence 
 
 Cicero 
 
 Milton 
 
 Tacitus 
 
 CONGREVE 
 
 Moliere 
 
 Tasso 
 
 COWPER 
 
 Martial 
 
 Virgil 
 
 Chapman 
 
 Moses 
 
 Voltaire 
 
 Clarendon 
 
 Nepos 
 
 Warton 
 
 CULLEN 
 
 Ofifer 
 
 Whitaker 
 
 Churchill 
 
 OVERBURY 
 
 Walpole 
 
 Drunken Barnaby 
 
 Ovid 
 
 WOTTON 
 
 Donne 
 
 Pope 
 
 Withers 
 
 Dryden 
 
 Phillidor 
 
 West, Richard 
 
 Davies, John, (or 
 
 PuBLius Syrus 
 
 Young 
 
 Hereford) 
 
 Persius 
 
 
 Duck, Stephen 
 
 QUARLES 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 Eu H 
 
 Randolph 
 
 
 Gray 
 
 Rousseau 
 
 
ERRATA. 
 
 Art. 7« For instruc, read instrue. 
 
 — 15. — Oder, — odor. 
 
 — 44. — moltost — multos. 
 
 — 46. — reputable, — respectable. 
 
 — 63. — cossack'd, — cassock^d, 
 
 — 68. — esto, — este 
 
 — 82. species, — spice, 
 
 Art.82. For Asie, read Asia, 
 ~ 89. — Ganse, — Gaure, 
 
 — 114. — peloes, < — pelves, 
 
 — 121, — loose, — lose* 
 
 — 183. — Caucellarius, — Cancellarius 
 156. — N—rth, — 2V— r--5. 
 
 — 158. — has, — have. 
 
THE 
 
 REJECTED PICTURES, 
 
 The smaller numerals refer to the translations in the Appendix. 
 
 1 . For trait of I. P. And — r — d — JEsg^., of Spring 
 Gardens, London. 
 
 elegans, non magnificus ; splendidus, non 
 
 sumptuosus; omnique diligenti^ munditiem non afflu- 
 entem afFectabat." Nepos.* 
 
 2. Portrait of Louis XVIII. ; Sketch for a larger 
 Picture, to be placed in the Hall of the 'National Guard 
 at Amiens, 
 
 This magistrate hath struck an awe into me, 
 
 And by his sweetness won a more re.2:ard 
 
 Unto his place, than all the boisterous moods 
 
 That ignorant greatness practiseth, to fill 
 
 The large unfit authority it wears. 
 
 How easy is a noble spirit discerned, 
 
 From harsh and sulph'rous matter that flies out 
 
 In contumelies, makes a noise, and stinks !" 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 B 
 
2 
 
 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 3. A Design for the Breakwater at Plymouth ^ with 
 Portraits of Mr. R — nn — e and Mr. Wh — db — in 
 Consultation. 
 
 LUCIAN.* 
 
 4. Portrait of Mr. S — rg-^t B — st ; in his hand is 
 the New Insolvefit Debtors' Bill. 
 
 Some will 
 
 Tear forth the fathers of poor families 
 
 Out of their beds, and coffin them alive 
 
 In some kind-clasping prison, where their bones 
 
 May be forth-coming, when the flesh is rotten. 
 
 Bur ?/o?ir sweet nature doth abhor these courses." 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 5. Portraits of L — d B—ym—e and his Protege 
 Master L—e. 
 
 (The nobleman speaks.) 
 
 Thou Vermin, Have I tane thee out of dung, 
 
 So poor, so wretched ; when no living thing 
 Woul^d keep thee company, but a spider or worse? 
 Raised thee from brooms, and dust, and wat'ring-pots ? 
 Put thee in words and fashion? Made thee fit 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 3 
 
 For more than ordinary fellowships? 
 
 Giv'n thee thy oaths, thy quarrelling dinaensions ? 
 
 Thy rules to cheat at horse-race, cock-pit, cards. 
 
 Dice, or whatever gallant tincture else ? 
 
 Made thee a second in mine own great art? 
 
 And have 1 this for thanks ? Do you rebel?'" 
 
 JoNSON. 
 
 6. Bust of the V—e-^Ck — nc — purchased by the Right 
 Honourable L—-d E---d—n. 
 
 ■ Thou shining Supplement of public laws.'^ 
 
 Yo^NG. 
 
 7. Portrait of CoL Q — t—n. 
 
 Tu hosce instruc hie : ego ero post prlncipia: 
 
 indeomnibu' signum dabo," < 
 
 Terence/^ 
 
 I will meditate the while upon some hard 
 
 message for a challenge/^ ~— 
 
 Shakspears. 
 
 8, Captain F-^tcl—r-^e, taking leave of the lOtk 
 Regiment of Dragoons. 
 
 — I have a paper with a spiu-ryal (royal) in iu'^ 
 
 JoissoN. 
 
 B 2 
 
4 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 9. View of the Residence of the M—h — ss of H—t—d^ 
 Manchester Square. 
 
 ubi laetus, 
 
 Una niente confluit caetus^ 
 Nescit locus lachiyiiiarc, 
 Nescit hospes osculari, 
 Facit in amoris testem 
 Anser vd Gallina festum." 
 
 Drunken Barnaby.* 
 
 10. A Sketch of the L 7/ of the City of L 
 
 assembled to prepare Petitions against the Property Tax. 
 Painted for Mr. F—v—lL 
 
 — Dreadful vvas the din 
 
 Of hissing through the Hally thick swarming now 
 With complicated monsters." 
 
 Milton. 
 
 The style of this painting, like the oratory of the 
 assembly which it represents, is obscure, presuming, 
 laboured, and low. All is abrupt and distorted gesti- 
 culation ; the sublime and the ludicrous are violently 
 jumbled together ; and there appears a most deplorable 
 union of boldness and commonplace, — gaudiness and 
 indecency, — humour and absurdity. There is no har- 
 mony of light and shade no softening-down of the 
 prominent groups and figures; all is spotty and party^ 
 coloured. About half a dozen of the characters are por- 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 5 
 
 traits; these are sufficiently marked to intimate that the 
 rest of the assembly are convenient cj^phers, whose 
 office is to give a consequence to the more distinguished 
 units. These important personages are stuck upon the 
 canvas amidst a set of the most unmeaning faces that 
 were ever destined to amuse a caricaturist.— After all, 
 ihe artist has the merit of having caught the spirit of 
 his subject ; though, to effect this, none of the elevation 
 of genius was required, but a sufficient dash of con- 
 fidence, ignorance, and vulgarity. The eminent gen- 
 tleman for whose cabinet this picture is designed has 
 doubtless suggested many beauties, from the stores of 
 his own versatile talent : if congenial qualities are the 
 closest bonds of friendship, the artist and the patron 
 jnay stand ^ par nobile fratrumJ 
 
 Opifer. 
 
 11. Portrait of the Rev. Dr. Ad — m CI — ke. 
 
 — If you had lived, Sir, 
 Time enough to have been Interpreter 
 To Babel's bricklayers, sure the tower had stood 
 
 Donne. 
 
6 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 12. Portrait of S— r H—ph—y D—y, painted after 
 his late travels* 
 
 ^ I have foundered nine score and odd posts.'^ 
 
 Shakspeare. 
 
 f- " cum uxojce veheretur in rheda, penulatus." 
 
 CrcERO.5 
 
 " what's this ? 
 
 A Lullianist ? a Ripley ? Filius artis ? 
 Can you sublime and dulcifie ? calcine? 
 Know you the Sapor Pontick ? Sapor Styptick i 
 Or what is homogene, or heterogene ?" 
 
 I study here the Mathematics and Distillation !" 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 13. Bust of the Rt, Hon^ L — d B—n, Author of 
 C' de H de, cum multis aliis. 
 
 '^Je fais mille sermens de ne jamais ecrire, 
 
 Aussitot, nialgre moi, tout mon feu se rallume, 
 Je reprends sur-le-champ le papier et la plume, 
 Et de mes vains sermens perdant le souvenir, 
 .J'attends de vers en vers qu'elle me daigne venir.^' 
 
 BolLEAU.* 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 1 
 
 14. A sketch of the Rev. Mr. T-^ws-^r, commonly 
 called " Parson T — ws — r.'' 
 
 I wonder why all our young fellows should 
 
 glory in an opinion of Atheism, when they may be so 
 much more conveniently lewd under the coverlet of 
 Religion.^' 
 
 CONGREVE. 
 
 15. Portrait of Mr. D—n — I Jl — x—d—r, of the 
 L — nd — n D — ks. 
 
 This is said to be an architect, but to which profes- 
 sion no allusion has been made by the artist. An 
 obscurity pervades the whole design. — A ragged stock- 
 broker is caressing the hand of the principal figure, 
 while a gentleman in the American naval uniform 
 regards him with a look of bitter contempt. The Stock 
 Exchange, and the Baptist Meeting House, Maze Pond, 
 Southwark, are seen in the distance; the former with 
 its door wide open, the latter with it shut. On a 
 table is a manuscript entitled " The justice of carrying 
 benefits to the debit side of the Ledger;" with the 
 motto He that giveth to the poor, lendethJ' 
 
 Please you, a servant of the Aqua Brethren, 
 That deal with widows' and with orphans' goods. 
 And make a just account unto the Saints : 
 
 A Deacon !" 
 
 " My name is Ananias." 
 
 JONSON. 
 
8 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 Suavis oder lucrl tenet, 
 Parum euro unde venit, 
 Campo, choro, tecto, thoro, 
 Caula, cella^ sylva, foro/' 
 
 Barnaby Harrington.7 
 
 A report from the Church of God assembling in 
 Maze Pond, Southwark, having been read to the Com- 
 mittee, stating the exclusion of an original picture, of 
 which this is a copy, from their walls, it was deemed 
 derogatory to the Academy to admit such an indifferent 
 subject at second hand. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 16. Portrait of H — s — n Cl—ke, Esq. 
 *• A lost mutton/' 
 
 Shakspeare. 
 
 17. Portrait of the Rev. Dr. M — sh. 
 Ecclesia in periculo."^ 
 
 38. Portrait of S—r J. M—r—y. 
 Poet Arma virumque cano." 
 
 S—R J. M. I am no fighter." 
 
 V1RGIL.9 
 Shakspeare. 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 9 
 
 19. Portrait of Dr. Ab — h — m R—s, Editor of the 
 
 Cy p id- 
 
 Homme de lettre, liomme d'erudition — homme de 
 suffisance, homme de capacile — homme consomm6 
 dans toiites les sciences, naturelles, morales, et poli- 
 tiques. Homme savant, savantissime, per omnes modes 
 et casus, — Homme qui possede, superlative, fables, 
 mythologies, et histoires ; grammaire, poesie, rheto- 
 rique, diaiectique, et sophistique, — mathematique, arith- 
 metique, optique, onerocritique, — cosmometrie, geo- 
 metrie, architecture, speculaire, et speculatoire, — me- 
 decine, astronomic, astrologie, physionomie, metopos- 
 copie, chiromancic; geomancie, &c. &c." 
 
 MOLIERE.'"^ 
 
 20. The Flight of the Giaour. 
 
 Who thundering comes on blackest steed." 
 
 Lord Byron. 
 
 There is nothing in this picture which marks the 
 genius of Lord Byron. The landscape has sufficient of 
 the characteristic gloom, without the wildness and 
 originality of the poetical representation. The Giaour 
 is a weak and undecided figure, with too little of energy 
 for the adventurous intriguer, and too much of morbid 
 villainy for the favoured paramour. The painter from 
 Lord Byron should converse with his impassioned 
 poetry, till his own mind becomes embued with the 
 same tenderness and misanthropy, — the same loftiness 
 
10 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 and obscurity, — the same accuracy and abruptness. 
 These studies will not produce a perfect painter, but 
 they will go far to excite strong emotion, and that 
 mingled feeling of admiration and surprise which Lord 
 Byron demands from his readers. It is not in the 
 choice of his materials that this noble bard excels. 
 Even yourThurlows can tell 
 
 ' some shallow stories of deep love, 
 
 How young Leander cross'd the Hellespont.' 
 
 It is in the delineation of intense feeling growing out 
 of common-place occurrences and situations, that this 
 singular poet excels his competitors. His groupings, 
 therefore, have something in them beyond the grasp of 
 an every-day painter. Fortunate is the artist who shall 
 ever receive the praise which belongs to Lord Byron, 
 
 Urit enim fulgore suo.'' 
 
 Opifer." 
 
 ^21. Portrait of the Hon. and Rev. W—ll—sl—yy 
 
 Rector of Ch — k — a, Vicar of — — — , ^c, ^c, <Src., <Sfc., &c. 
 
 Nolo episcopari."'* 
 
 The assertion was not believed by the Committee. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 2^2. A Prospective View of C n H — e, An, 
 
 Dom. 1835. 
 
 • The small Tenement, out of reparations^ 
 
 That, at the end of your long Row of Houses, 
 By the Piscaria.^ It was, in Volpone's time. 
 Your Predecessor, ere he grew diseased, 
 A handsom, pretty customed. Bawdy-house, 
 As any was in Penice, (none disprais'd,) 
 But fell with him ; his body and that house 
 Decay'd together." 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 Omitted, from a respectful and necessary attention to 
 the feelings of the C — rt. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 23. Portrait of R. JB. Sh—r—d-^n, Esq. 
 
 O Faustule, die amico 
 Quo in loco, quo in vico, 
 Sive campo, sive tecto, 
 Sine linteo, sine lecto, 
 Propinasti, queis tabernis 
 An in Terris, an Avernis 
 
 Drunken Barnaby.*^ 
 
 ^ At present it is a market for hay, and not for fish. 
 
12 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 24. The Society of Architects— vide C—rt C—l^d—r, 
 1815. 
 
 The scene is laid in the interior of a tavern ; the mem- 
 bers are earnestly employed in the design of a temple 
 to be dedicated to Obscurity. Models of workhouses, 
 prisons, hospitals, warehouses, bridewells, bedlams, peni- 
 tentiaries, and works unexecuted without number, cover 
 the table. L — w — s, C— k — r — 11, H— rd — k, and 
 S- -nd — rs, are in deep consultation on a proposition of 
 W — Ik— ns to convert unaltered to this purpose an 
 AfpoSivlri^ioy^^ which he found in Magna Graecia: the 
 visual rays of the spectacles of Al — x — nd — r are directed 
 to the consultation, while he is slily endeavouring to un- 
 seat H — rd — k from an enviable place near the model of 
 the Penitentiary : Br — wn and S — x — n are in a deep 
 sleep : Sm— rke is alone, laughing, and making a sketch 
 of the party. 
 
 The temple is intended to be hung with the effigies 
 of the principal members, and to answer a double pur- 
 pose in the gardens of the landlord at Pimlico. 
 
 The grouping of this picture is excellent, and the cha- 
 racteristics of the several members of the society are 
 marked with unusual fidelity. 
 
 Opifer. 
 
 " You must know they have been abroad." 
 
 CONGREVE. 
 
 But when ? and where ? 
 
 Opifer. 
 
 Non cuivis homini contingit adire Corinthum ?'''^ 
 
 This picture was returned to the Exhibitors for a sup- 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 13 
 
 posed mistake in the title ; no architects of the names 
 mentioned being known. A letter from the Society 
 referred the Committee, in rather indignant terms, to 
 Johnson, where was found : 
 
 " Architect, sub., a contriver anything J' 
 
 The Committee saw their error, but it was too late. 
 
 Hangman, 
 
 25. jd Nautical Group ; three Elder Brethren of the 
 Trinity House ; viz. the D — e of M — lb — /?, the M — $ 
 of C — d — w, and the E — I of C — th — m, on a Voyage to 
 Depfford ! 
 
 • This man saw 'em. 
 
 Together on the water, in a Gondola." 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 " We be three poor mariners P' 
 
 26. Portrait of Mr. W. S—th, M. P.for N—r—ch, 
 in the act of presenting the Trinity Bill to the House of 
 Commons. 
 
 " I believe in one God the Father Almight}^ and*' — 
 
 Apostles' Creed. 
 
 • No more." 
 
 Shakspeare 
 
 The orthodox feelings of the Academy were horror- 
 struck at the attempt to introduce this picture. 
 
 Hangman, 
 
14 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 27. Pen and^Ink Drawing of the late Rev. 
 H--nt — ngt — S.S. 
 
 Truly, a very faithful Brother : 
 
 A Botcher; and a Man, by Revelation, 
 
 That had a competent knowledge of the Truth.'* 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 28. The Kiss. 
 
 You know 'twas in the dark you taught me." 
 
 Moore. 
 
 There is something in this picture, which, without 
 being absolutely indelicate, is calculated to excite more 
 warm ideas than the tenderest passages of Catullus, or 
 Joannes Secundus. The artist has, happily enough, 
 contrived to heighten the interest of the subject, by the 
 obscurity with which he has treated it ; had the scene 
 been that of broad day-light, he would have been a little 
 puzzled to have retained his uncertain attitudes and slight 
 draperies, without copying some of the positions of his 
 academical sketch-book, or going to the box-lobby for 
 a study. The colouring is more gaudy than brilliant, 
 more loose than graceful, and more affected than soft. 
 The painter altogether goes along with the poet in 
 leading the imagination to the verge of pruriency, where 
 he leaves it to pursue its own journey through the slip- 
 pery paths whose barriers he has broken dowm. 
 
 Opifer. 
 
 This is a picture which delighted the elder members 
 of the Academy exceedingly, and it was voted to 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 15 
 
 appear nem, con. It has been since put aside, upon the 
 suggestion of the Chaplain, who thought it might, 
 perhaps, be the subject of a prosecution by the Society 
 for the Suppression of Vice. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 29. View of the H—e of C — m—s after Midnight. 
 
 The parUament party doe not play fair play, in sit- 
 ting up till two of the clock in the morning, to vote 
 something they have a mind to. Tis like a crafty 
 gamester, that makes the company drunk, then cheats 
 them of their money.'' 
 
 SeldeNo 
 
 SO. Portrait of R—ch—rdP—xo^ I, Translator 
 of the Ph — m—c-~'p — ia L — din — 7/5 — s, 1809, in a 
 Professional Conversation with one of his Pupils ; Mr. 
 Ph—l—ps, of the Poultry^ attending in the Back Ground, 
 
 Errando disco." 
 
 Barn. Harrington.'^ 
 
 P. " Je tiens que cet empechement de Faction de sa 
 langue est cause par de certaines humeurs, qu'entre 
 nous autres savans, nous appelons humeurs peccantes; 
 peccantes — c'est a dire, humeurs peccantes ; d'autantque 
 les vapeurs formees par les exhalaisons des influences 
 qui, s'elevant dans la region des maladies, venant, pour 
 ainsi dire, a— Entendez vous le Latin ? 
 
16 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 Q. En aucune fagon. 
 
 P. Vous n'entendez point le Laiin ? 
 
 Q. Non. 
 
 P. ( Avec enthousiasme.) Cabricias arci thuram, cata^ 
 lamuSf singulariter nominativo hac mmay la muse ; bonus, 
 bona, bonum, Deussanctus estne dratio Latinas^ Etiam, 
 oui, quare, pouiquoi ? Quia substantivos et adjectivum 
 concordat in generiy numeruniy et casus. 
 
 Q. Ah! Quen'ai-je etudie !" 
 
 Molietie/7 
 
 SI. A Representation of the Council Table of the C — 
 gr—ss at Vienna, zcith Portraits of the Principal Charac 
 ters composing that August Assembly. 
 
 *^ We steal by line and level." 
 
 Shakspeare, 
 
 " You most high and mighty princes of this lower 
 world, who, at this intricate and various game of war, 
 vye kingdoms and win crowns; know there is a Quo 
 Warranto, whereto you are to give account of your eye* 
 glorious actions, according to the righteous rules of 
 sacred justice. How warrantable it is to rend imperial 
 crowns from off the sovereign heads of their too weak 
 possessors, or to snatch sceptres from out the conquered 
 hand of Heaven's anointed Majesty; and by your vast 
 ambitions, still to enlarge your large dominions, with 
 kingdoms ravisht from their natural princes, — judge 
 you ! O let your brave designs and well-weighed actions 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 17 
 
 be as just as ye are glorious : and consider that ali your 
 wars, whose ends are not to defend your own possessions 
 or to recover your dispossessions, are but princely in- 
 juries, which none but Heaven can right/ 
 
 QUAELES. 
 
 32. View of the Victualling Office^ Deptford, 
 
 ubi mures 
 
 Intus reptant, e^tus fures*'' 
 
 Drunken Barnaby.^^ 
 
 33. Group of Young Children; after the manner of 
 Hembrant. By a celebrated amateur. 
 
 Why how, now, you smoky persecutor of 
 
 Nature/' 
 
 JoNSON. 
 
 34. Bust of Mr. R—b—s—n, M.P. 
 
 I shall be hang'd in effigie, and pasted up for the 
 exemplary ornament of necessary houses and coblers' 
 stalls/' 
 
 CONGREVE. 
 
 Fear for the safety of the windows of the Academy 
 prevented the admission of this article. 
 
 Hangman, 
 
 The rejection of this bust will be an epoch in the 
 annals of the Academy. Public opinion, though ex- 
 
 c 
 
18 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 pressed by the lowest members of society, has been at-^ 
 tended to, for the first time since the grant of the 
 charter. — " Sperabimus.'' 
 
 OPIFER. 
 
 35. A View of the P — e R — fs Cottage, in Windsor 
 Great Park. By Mr. N^h, Engineer. 
 
 No description can convey an adequate idea of this 
 performance. Were the design stuck up without an 
 explanation, the first impression it would furnish would 
 be that of an immense tithe-barn converted into a work- 
 house or infirmary. The disjointed forms, the heavy 
 thatch, and the lattice windows would equally support 
 this notion, were it not for the forest of gothic chim- 
 nies, and the colonnade of unhewn firs, which imply 
 too much of grotcsqueness for any purposes of utility. 
 In one point of view this building suggests exalted 
 notions of the munificence of the English court; for if 
 little less than ofSO OOO could be bestowed on such an 
 erection (though by the way, the civil list spoke of 
 about a fourth of the real expenditure) what superlative 
 patronage may we not expect, if the R — t, by any 
 chance, should fall in love with the beauties of classical 
 architecture. 
 
 It was the original intention of the C — n H— e 
 Committee of taste and economy to produce a sort of 
 rural banqueting lioiise, by enlarguig a small cottage 
 at an expense o\ auout o£300, which stood on the site of 
 the present thatched palace. This humble edifice is the 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 19 
 
 root from which all the expanding beauties of the present 
 erection have sprung. The original walls have been so 
 pulled down, and patched up, that they are pretty much 
 in the state of the silk stocking which was darned with 
 worsted till it lost all consciousness of its primitive ex- 
 istence. If the spirit of Ovid could revive, the subject 
 would be worthy a supplement to the Metamorphoses. 
 
 Diruit, sedificat, mutat quadrata rotundis 
 
 Horace,'^ 
 
 — —^^ Some patched dog-hole ek'd with ends of wall.'' 
 Imperial works, and worthy kings 
 
 Pope. 
 
 The 'Engineer committed a mistake in sending this 
 design to the i\cademy. Its exhibition had been for- 
 bidden by an order from C— 1 Mc — m — n. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 36. Portrait of Sir W—n W. W—ne. 
 
 " He accounts none well descended that call him not 
 cousin, and prefers Owen Glendower before any of the 
 nine worthies/' 
 
 OVERBURY. 
 
20 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 37. Portrait of Mr. W. Pl—f—r, composing the 
 hieroglyphick for the Almanack of Francis Moore, 1816. 
 
 Sapientum Octavus !"^° 
 
 I have observed him, at your publick ordinary 
 
 Take his advertisement from a Traveller, 
 (A concealed Statesman) in a trencher of meat; 
 And instantly before the meal was done 
 Convey an answer rn a toothpick. Strange! 
 How could this be, Sir ? Why the meat was cut 
 So like his character and so laid, as he 
 Must easily read the cypher. I have heard 
 He could not read. Sir 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 38. Portrait of Mr. J^s, Editor of the E — h Review. 
 
 To the gates of Tartar, thou most excellent devil of 
 wit." 
 
 " Let there be gall enough in thy ink, though thou 
 write with a goose-pen— no matter." 
 
 " I warrant there's vinegar and pepper in't." 
 
 Shakspeare. 
 
 39. Portrait of L- y C — s—l—gh. 
 
 " Nature 
 
 Never bestowed upon mortality 
 
 A more unblam'd, a more harmonious feature, 
 
 She play'd the Step-dame in all faces else.'^ 
 
 JoNSON* 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 21 
 
 40. Portrait of L-^d T—l — zo, in his Study ^ preparing 
 a new edition of M—nl — t ! 
 
 Best sing it to the tune of light o'love 
 It is too heavy for so light a tune." 
 
 Shakspeare. 
 Aut insanit homo, aut versus facit.''— 
 
 Horace." 
 
 Let me not live if ever I saw any thing moreloose, 
 and almost more childish/^ — 
 
 Whitaker. 
 
 'Tis ridiculous for a lord to print verses : ^tis well 
 enough to make ihem to please himself, but to make 
 them public is foolish." — 
 
 Selden. 
 
 The committee had rejected this portrait conceiving 
 it a libel on his lordship, as the artist, amongst other 
 papers on the table, had endorsed one, * Appointment 
 of Clerk for the Custody of Idiots and Lunatics.' — A 
 recent inspection of the Court Calendar has satisfied 
 them that the painter only intended a harmless reference 
 to one of his lordship's honours. 
 
 Hangman, 
 
 41. Bust of Mr. W—th-^m. 
 " Rem populi tractas ?" 
 
 Juvenal.' 
 
2£ THE REJECTED PICTUEE3. 
 
 42. Portrait of Field Marshal the Duke of W-^U-^n. 
 
 He knows that the hazards of battles, not the pomp 
 of ceremonies, are soldiers' best theatres ; and strives to 
 gain reputation, not by the multitude, but by the great- 
 ness of his actions/' He understands in war there 
 is no mean to err twice ; faults therefore he pardons 
 none. Besiege him never so strictly, so long as the air 
 is not cut from him his heart faints not. He hath 
 learned as well to make use of a victory, a? to get it, and 
 in pursuing his enemy, like a whirlwind carries all 
 before him." " Hasty and overmuch heat he accounts 
 the step-dame to all great actions that will not suffer 
 them to thrive; if he cannot overcome his enemy by 
 force he does it by time. He thinks war is never to be 
 given over, but on one of these three conditions, an 
 assured peace, absolute victory, or an honest death." 
 
 Ovj;rbury. 
 
 43. Design for an intended alteration in the Sta^te" 
 coach and other Paraphernalia of the Lord Mayor of 
 London. 
 
 <^ Why you must know 'tis a piece of work to- 
 ward the finishing of an Alderman." 
 
 CoNaREVE. 
 
 44. Interior of the College of Physicians. 
 
 " Gotham! ubi moltos 
 
 Si non oranes vidi stultos.'^ 
 
 Barn. Harrington/^ 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 45. The Canaille'' ofC—U-n H—e. 
 
 D'un maitre effemine corrupteurs politiques, 
 Plongeoient dans les plaisirs ses langueurs letargiques. 
 Tyrans voluptueux qui regnoient sous son nom." 
 
 Voltaire.*^ 
 
 Omitted, from a respectful and necessary attention to 
 the feelings of the C — rt. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 46» The Return of Jacqueline. A sketch in water 
 colours. 
 
 ^Tis Jacqueline ! 'tis Jacqueline ! 
 
 Her little brother laughing cried ; 
 I know her by her kirtle green. 
 
 She comes along the mountain-side ! 
 
 Rogers. 
 
 The artist has, consistently enough, chosen perishable 
 materials to embody this last freak of Mr. Rogers' 
 Pegasus ; and he has succeeded in producing a picture 
 as cold and washy and undecided as the poet could 
 chuse for the representation of * Jacqueline.' Mr. 
 Rogers has certainly accomplished some laboured ele- 
 gancies in his day, and has exhibited very fair evidences 
 of a correct taste and a musical ear. The • Pleasures 
 of Memory' and ' Epistle to a Friend' will place him in 
 a reputable rank between Hayley and Pope. But if 
 ^ Jacqueline' aspired to any fame, beyond that of the 
 nursery, Mr. Rogers must have been jlyly cockered up 
 
£4 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 by Lord Byron, who might have wanted the gruel of 
 his friend, to stand by the side of his own eau-de-vie, 
 for the amusement of the lovers of Parnassian strong- 
 waters. The bards apj)ear to have seen the absurdity 
 of th( ir connexion, as Mr. Miller, the high-priest of 
 the Nine, has pronounced a sentence of divorce upon 
 these ill-assorted Muses, 
 
 Opifer. 
 
 47. Portrait of the Editor of the T—s Newspaper. 
 
 This swoi'd rU maintain to be the best Divine, 
 Anatomist, Lawyer, or Casuist in Europe." 
 
 CoNGREVE. 
 
 48. Portrait of Jld-'H W—d. 
 
 ^ " your name. Sir ? 
 
 Ald. My name is Politick Wou'dBe! 
 
 O that speaks him." 
 
 JoNSON. 
 
 49. Portrait of the Author of The Art of evading a 
 charitable sahscriptio7i,^^ 
 
 (La Re i lie parle) 
 — " sans doute, il ra^dite un hbelle." 
 
 Anon.*^ 
 
 Omitted, from a respectful and necessary attention, 
 &c. Hangman. 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 25 
 
 50. The Steeple of St. Anns, Soho, L — nd — w, as exe^ 
 cuted by S. P. C — kr — //, Architect to the Cathedral of 
 St. P—l, L—nd—n. 
 
 ORDO— bulbosus.'^ 
 
 RoUSSEAU.^^ 
 
 A master-stroke of absurdity." 
 
 When broken into unmeaning parts, as those 
 (steeples) erected in later times are, they are a pile of 
 barbarous ugliness ; and deform the temples to which 
 they are coupled." 
 
 Walpole. 
 
 velut aegri somnia, vanse 
 
 Fingentur species : ut nec pes nec caput uni 
 Reddatur formae." 
 
 Horace/7 
 
 What lover of his nation's glory, but must be indig- 
 nant to see the author of this monstrous production 
 deemed worthy to rank as one of the successors of Sir 
 C. Wren ! What Englishman who values the monu- 
 ments of his country but must tremble to learn, that 
 one of the most important of them is confided to the 
 judgment of such an architect ! 
 
 It would be curious to learn the progress of this gen- 
 tleman's studies in ecclesiastical architecture — to know 
 in what school they began; and by what c(^urse per- 
 fected ! If qualifications like his lead to the approba- 
 tion of men in such distinguished situations as the four 
 trustees of the cathedral of St. P — 1 : Lose no more 
 
26 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 ticpe, ye students, in searching out and embodying the 
 principles of propriety, harmony, and refined taste — for- 
 get Kings College Chapel and St. Stephen's Walbrook, 
 and hurry away to the Low Countries — there study the 
 architectural abortions with which their churches 
 abound, and after having stripped them of the eccen«* 
 tricities with which an inventive, but mistaken, genius 
 has loaded ihem, produce ihem as models, by which you 
 may win your way to patronage at home ! 
 
 Perhaps the arch-trustee could explain the secret rea- 
 sons of this appointment. Whether laudable or not, as 
 a body the trustees may perhaps succeed to the immor- 
 tality of Erostratus, and be infamous for the destruction 
 of the temple. 
 
 51. Miniature of Mr. C — kr-^H, jun,^ Son of the 
 above. 
 
 And what wilt thou be, young cockerel f 
 
 Dryden* 
 
 52. Portrait of the Rt. Hon. E^lB-^th^t. 
 
 Am I politic ? am I subtle ? am I a Machiavel ?" 
 
 Shakspeare. 
 
 53. Sketches for a Panorama of the Isle of Elba. 
 
 I think he will carry this island home in his pocket, 
 arid give it his «on for an a^pple 
 
 Shakspeare. 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 27 
 
 54. Bust of H—t D—vs, Esq., M. P., intended for 
 the Company of Stationers. 
 
 Davus sum, non CEdipus." 
 
 Terence.** 
 
 55. Portrait of the Rt. Hon. L — d Gl^nb—e. 
 
 I do remember an apothecary/^ 
 
 Shakspeare. 
 
 56. The P jR • inspecting some new patterns of 
 
 Dress for the lOth Hussars. 
 
 Sum time hee delighteth in manye gardes, weltes, 
 pinckes, and pounces; sum time agayne to the contrary, 
 bee weareth his garments as pleyn as a sacke, yet fayleth 
 he not to chaunge also that plaineness if any other 
 newfangle be invented: this is the vanitie of his delite.'' 
 
 Eu H 
 
 57. Portrait of L-^-d C — h — e. 
 
 Deprendi miserum est 
 
 Horace.*^ 
 
 * The anonymous author of" The Institucion of a Gcutlfmau/' 
 1568. 
 
(2S THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 58. Head of a Bibliomaniac. A Study. 
 
 — A fellow, that pretends only to learning. 
 Buys titles, and nothing else of books in him." 
 
 JoNSON. 
 
 59. Interior of the Q -n's P — I — ce, St. J — — s'5 
 
 P— A:, in its present state. 
 
 " Suntfornaces sine fumo 
 Prom ptuaria sine promo 
 Clara porta, clausa domo 
 O camini sine foco, 
 Et culinse sine coquo ! 
 Clamans, domum 6 inanem ! 
 Resonabat Echo, famem! 
 Quinam habitant muros? 
 Respirabat Echo, mures! 
 Ditis omen, nomen habe 
 Echo respondebat, Abe 
 
 Barnaby Harrington.^'' 
 
 Omitted, from a respectful and necessary attention, 
 &c., &c. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 29 
 
 60. A Representation of the Temple of Concord, the 
 
 Pagoda, the Balloon, the Sea-Fight on the Serpentine 
 
 River, and ffty-seven most remarkable Fireworks ; as 
 
 exhibited on the Grand National and Royal Jubilee, 
 
 August \, 1814 ; from the original Sketches of Sir W. 
 C — gr—e. 
 
 Art thoa good at these kickshaws, knight ?" 
 
 Shakspeare. 
 
 61. Head of Mr. C—k—r. 
 
 Ineptus 
 
 Etjactantior hie paul6 est." 
 
 " Neque enim concludere versum 
 
 Dixeris esse satis." 
 
 Horace.^' 
 
 62. Alice Fell'' A Sketch in Distemper. 
 
 " And whither are you going, child. 
 To night along these lonesome ways ?" 
 ' To Durham,' answered she, half wild ; 
 ' Then come with me into the chaise." 
 
 Wordsworth. 
 
 This artist, labouring to be pathetic, has produced, - 
 a caricature ; Mr. Wordsworth, yearning to be natural, 
 has excited, a horse-laugh. So far they are assimilated. 
 If such deplorable inanity as this painter has chosen to 
 
go THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 embody, were the sole characteristic of Mr. W/s poetry^ 
 he would be past criticism. But there is a spark of 
 simplicity and singleness of heart, a loftiness of imagi- 
 nation, and a blaze of virtue, amidst his puerilities, 
 which almost tempt one to kiss the book and burn it, at 
 the same moment. After all, it may be amusing to hear 
 the lispings of the infant fill up the pauses of the philo- 
 sopher ; and yet, a lover of wisdom would dispense with 
 the rattle and the lullaby. Mr. W. has shewn many 
 very encouraging symptoms of amendment in ' The 
 Recluse,' and if it be true, that 
 
 " Spirits are not finely touch'd, 
 
 But to fine issues,^' 
 we may yet hope for a strain of dignity and truth, which 
 may tempt us to forget the rhyming records of the 
 cockle-shells and straws which this poet has raked up in 
 his search after Nature. 
 
 Opiter. 
 
 63. Portrait of the Hon. and Rev. C—p—L 
 
 A cossack'd huntsman, and a fiddling priest/' 
 
 CoWPEE. 
 
 64. The Commercial Hall Wine Company. A Group, 
 NOT q/* Bacchanals. 
 
 Non ad vinum, sed venale.'' 
 
 Drunken Barnaby*^* 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES- 31 
 
 65. Enamel of the Princess T^-ll—y^d, in her BoU'» 
 doir» Painted when Madame Gr—nde. 
 
 • " A wench 
 
 O' the first year ! A beauty ripe as harvest ! 
 Whose skin is whiter than a swan all over ! 
 Than silver, snow, or lilies ! A soft lip. 
 Would tempt you to eternity of kissing ; 
 And flesh that melteth in the touch to blood/' 
 
 JoNsoit. 
 
 66. Portrait of Sir G e B — l—w. 
 
 How now, my nettle of India?" 
 
 SHAKSPEAHEa 
 
 67. Portrait ofW "ll—m W^ds—th, Esq. 
 
 « What art thou. Will? 
 
 A babe of Nature's broode ?" 
 
 Nicholas Breton, 
 
 ^' Put thyself into the trick of singularity V' 
 
 SHAKSPEARSr 
 
32 THE REJECTED PICTUaES. 
 
 68. 69. UTRUM HORUM? two Pictures painted 
 for the Town of W—nds—r. 
 
 No. I. — An imaginary view in IV — nds—r Upper 
 
 Park, taken from the Window of the Q n's Apart^ 
 
 7nents. 
 
 The belt on the east side of the park appears com- 
 pleated, and all the usual avenues are closed; the pro- 
 menade, the belle-vue of W — nds — is destroyed, and 
 one monotonous green covers the v^hole lawn. Those 
 animating groups; which were wont to seek health and 
 high enjoyment on this delightful spot are banished. 
 
 Procul, procul esto profani."^^ 
 
 All are banished ! and cattle only are permitted to visit 
 it! 
 
 Solitudinem faciunt, paceni vocant." 
 
 Tacitus.^^ 
 
 They make a solitude, and call it peace.'* 
 
 Plagiarist. 
 
 For a moment forgetting the evident injustice of this 
 design ; should this misanthropical intention go on to 
 its illegal completion, (and it is all but executed,) the 
 lovers of poetry and nature will be deeply injured. 
 They will be no longer able to contemplate this magni- 
 ficent landscape, or compare its features with the 
 sketch made of it by Gray, when he rambled among its 
 shades free and uncontroled; No longer will they 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 S3 
 
 From the stalely brow 
 
 Of Windsor's heights th' expanse below. 
 Of grove, of lawn, of mead, survey ; 
 
 Whose turf, whose glade, whose flowers among 
 
 Wanders the hoary Thames along 
 His silver winding way. 
 
 Ah happy hills ! ah pleasing shades ! 
 Ah fields belov'd in vain ! 
 
 It is remarkable that, whether at the Congress, or a 
 Castle, whether in parcelling out Poland, or a Park, 
 whether they be male or female, the same selfishness is 
 to be found in crowned heads ; feut I do hope, that, in 
 this country, at least, the same trembling inaction will 
 not always be found on the part of the people. Can 
 there be an attribute of royalty, which, for the gratifica- 
 tion of its own ascetic fancies, shall desire to surround it- 
 self with the gloomy and unsocial privacy of Asiatic 
 power, amidst the recollections of those happier days, 
 when kings, and their train, mixed securely and freely 
 with their subjects, dignifying their own pleasures, by 
 associating them with the enjoyments of all around 
 them ! 
 
 No. 2. A Portrait of Timothy Bennet, of Hampton 
 
 Wick, in Middlesex, Shoe^maker, aged 7 5, 1752. 
 
 This true Briton (unwilling to leave the world worse 
 than he found it) by a vigorous application to the laws 
 of his country, obtained a free passage through Bushy 
 Park, which had many years been withheld from the 
 people.'^ 
 
 Inscription beneath the engraved portrait, 
 i> 
 
S4 
 
 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 A village Hampden that with dauntless breast 
 The little tyrant of his fields withstood/' 
 
 Gray. 
 
 A pawn may check a king/^ 
 
 Phillidor. 
 
 Some patriot like Timothy Bennet must soon enter 
 into a similar contest, and demand similar honours from 
 the townsmen of W — ds — r and the English people. The 
 intended public injury is the same, and the success of 
 another temperate and unyielding application to the 
 laws is as certain : I know from the constitution of 
 human nature, that opposition to the wanton depreda- 
 tions of power is not to be expected from the weeds that 
 grow at a palace foot ; but beyond that pernicious at- 
 mosphere I trust there are Englishmen who will not 
 shrink from a public duty. 
 
 " Possessio pacifica j>02/r anns 60 facit jus." 
 
 PrINCIPIA leg. ET ^QTJIT.^^ 
 
 " Lex non favet delicatorum votis.''^^ 
 
 Let these just and simple maxims of the common law 
 be impressed upon the mind of every Englishman, as a 
 shield against this, or any other oppression, intended to 
 strip him of those enjoyments, which, as " Creation's 
 Heir,'' he has long possessed. 
 
 . Opifer. 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 35 
 
 r The two last pictures omitted, from a respectful and 
 necessary attention, &c., &c. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 ' 70. Portrait of a beautiful English Recluse in the Ab- 
 baye aux Bois, Paris, 1815. 
 
 This form 
 
 Was not intended to so dark a use. 
 
 Had you been crooked, foul, of some coarse mold, 
 
 A cloyster had done well j but such feature. 
 
 That might stand up the glory of a kingdom, 
 
 To live Recluse! is a mere solaecism. 
 
 Though in a nunnery." 
 
 You were created, lady, for the light." 
 
 JONSQN. 
 
 7 1 . Portrait of T -5 M — esq. 
 
 They that dally nicely with words, may 
 Quickly make them wanton." 
 
 ShakspEake. 
 
 — " He crowned 
 
 The brimming goblet, seiz'd the thyrsus, bound 
 
 His brows with ivy, rushM into the field 
 
 Of wild imagination, and there reeFd, 
 
 The victim of his own lascivious fires, 
 
 And, dizzy with delight, profan'd the sacred wires." 
 
 COWPER. 
 
36 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 72. Miniature of the Rt. Hon. G — e C — n — Em- 
 bassador Extraordinary/. 
 
 An embassador is a man sent to lie abroad for the 
 benefit of his country." 
 
 Sr. H. Wotton. 
 This gent-man hath a par'lous head." 
 
 JoNSON. 
 
 On parle peu; quand la vanite ne fait pas parler." 
 
 ROCHEFOUCAULT.57 
 
 73. Portrait of the Editor of the M—n—g P — t. 
 
 The substance of his discourse is news, and his cen- 
 sure, like shot, depends upon the charging.^' 
 
 OVERBURY. 
 
 74. Bust of Mr. K^n. 
 
 " Libera per vacuum posui vestigia princeps, 
 Non aliena meo pressi pede.'^ 
 
 HORACE.^^ 
 
 75. Sketch of the Decorations of the New Order of 
 the Bath. 
 
 ^* Ut Iseti phaleris omnes, et torquibus omnes.'' 
 
 JUVENAL.^5 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES, 37 
 
 76. Portrait of the Rev. Mr. H — b — r, and an Un- 
 believer in the Bibliomania. 
 
 Pertinax Surly 
 
 Will you believe Antiquity i Records ? 
 
 ril show you a book, where Moses, and his Sister, 
 
 And Solomon, have written — 
 
 Aye, and a treatise penn'd by Adam." 
 
 JONSON, 
 
 77. Portrait of L — h H—t, Esq., Editor of the 
 Ex'^m — r. 
 
 There is myself videlicet, myself r 
 
 Shakspeare. 
 
 This is a copy from Mr. R — b*— ts — n's portrait of the 
 same gentleman in the Spring-Garden Exhibition ; we 
 cannot better describe it than in \\\e,'pure and simple cri- 
 ticism of that eminent politico-poetico-artistical critic 
 Mr. R. H — t. ' It is chearfully sober in colour, intel- 
 ligent in its drawing and effect, and pleasingly tender 
 and forcible in its gradations.^ 
 
 Opifer. 
 
 The Academy do not like Ex — m— -rs. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 78. Portrait of an eminent Barrister. 
 
 Respondes, altero ad frontem sublato, altero 
 Ad mentum depresso, supercilio.^' 
 
 Cicero,'^^ 
 
38 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 79. A Bacchanalian Orgie in the gardens of C n 
 
 H~e. 
 
 (The Host speaks.) 
 
 « — ^ prepare 
 
 Me musick, dances, banquets, all delights; 
 The Turk is not more sensual in his pleasures 
 Than will Volpone— " 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 80. S—r J—n N—w—t. 
 
 Maximus in minimis." 
 
 Anon.^* 
 
 He knew perfectly what belonged to the flocci- 
 nauci-nihili-pilification of politics,'^ 
 
 Shenstone. 
 
 81. Portrait of the Rt, Hon. the M—q—s of H d. 
 
 " A beauteous sister, or convenient zmfe, 
 Are prizes in the lottery of life." 
 
 Young. 
 
 82. A Portrait of L — d C-stl—h. 
 
 This is an elegant and spirited representation of the 
 outward semblance of a perfect gentleman. There is 
 nothing about it to mark the man in office : it conveys 
 no expression beyond that of a placid courtier enjoying 
 the ^ otium cum dignitatej 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 39 
 
 If a graceful person, — if a winning deportment,— if a 
 conciliating serenity, were the highest requisites of the 
 
 Palinurus of Great Britain, then might L — d C- h 
 
 justify that tremendous confidence, which, investing 
 him w^ith the wings and caduceus of almost sovereign 
 power, gave him a seat at the faro-table of the Con- 
 gress, to shuffle and cut for the destinies of the world. 
 
 Assuredly his L p carried with him none of that 
 
 grandeur of intellect, or that purity of purpose, which 
 combine the decisions of a present policy with what is 
 past and what is to come, and unite the interests of parts 
 with the security of the whole. The rule and com- 
 passes of the Congress may have proved them good 
 mathematicians, but scurvy moralists. Had the repre- 
 sentative of Great Britain stood erect upon the vantage 
 ground of rigid justice, the fallen angel of France 
 would never have tempted the rash flight which has 
 borne him to a throne, or had our arch-enemy even 
 re-ascended that eminence, there might have been 
 words of high meaning left us which now we have pro- 
 faned. The trip to Vienna and the blue ribband have a 
 
 little seasoned the S — y's old talent of equivoque 
 
 with a species of arrogance. It is to be hoped that his 
 L p will not forget the services of his ancient ar- 
 mour of urbanity ; it has parried many a blow, before 
 which all the bristles of ordinary controversy would 
 have fallen. 
 
 Opifer. 
 
 Comme c'est le caractere des grands esprits de faire 
 entendre en peu de paroles beaucoup de choses; les 
 
40 
 
 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 petits esprits, au contraire, ont le don de beaucoup 
 parler, et de ne rien dire." 
 
 RoCHEFOUCAULT.** 
 
 *^ S'arrivi col saper, ch'e d'alto infuso, 
 Alle cose remote anco e lontane, 
 Deh dimmi, qual riposo o qual ruina 
 Ai gran moti deir Asie* il Ciel destina 
 
 Tasso/5 
 
 I'll not answer that." 
 
 Shakspeare. 
 
 His L p having received the blue ribband since 
 
 the painting of this portrait, the Committee did not 
 think it polite to exhibit him without his honours. 
 
 Hangman, 
 
 83. Miniature of Col. D 
 
 Thou art a votary to fond desire." 
 ' Shakspeare. 
 
 The female visitors of the Exhibition were expected 
 to create an inconvenient crowd, by their anxiety to view 
 this unfortunate victim of gallantry. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 * For Asia read Europe, 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 41 
 
 84. A Design for a Mausoleum to the Memory of tJie 
 
 late S—r Fr — nc — s B rg s, now executing at 
 
 D ch. 
 
 you have had 
 
 For the instruments, as bricks, and lome, and glass, 
 
 Aheady thirty pound — and for materials. 
 
 They say, some ninety more ; and they have heard since. 
 
 That one of Heidelberg, made it of an egg 
 
 And a small paper of pin-dust." 
 
 JoNSON. 
 
 The above design has been superseded by one of the 
 same subject now exhibiting. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 The mannerism of this artist becomes dishonest. In 
 the earlier part of his hfe novelty was his great aim, 
 and he executed some inventions for his various em- 
 ployers. From these he has been stealing ever since. 
 Lincoln's-inn-fields and Dulwich Cottage will lament, 
 not the loss, but the existence, of this Professor of 
 Architecture. 
 
 Opifer. 
 
4^ THE REJECTED PiGTURES. 
 
 85. Heads of r H. M~ld—y and a Lady. 
 
 ^' Cum puella speciosa 
 Cujus nomen erat Tiom 
 
 — — provocavi 
 Ad amandum quam amavi." 
 
 Barnaby Harrington. 
 
 O, thou delicious, damn'd, dear, destructive 
 Woman. I shall be the jest of the town.'' 
 
 CONGREVE. 
 
 86. Portrait of Mr. M—tg—m—y, A—th--rof the 
 W-^nd^r of S — tz nd, S^c. 
 
 Que les vers ne soient pas votre eternel emploi ; 
 Cultivez vos amis, soyez homme de foi, 
 C'est peu d'etre agreable, et charmant dans un livre, 
 II faut savoir encore/ et converser et vivre." 
 
 BoiLEAU.-^^ 
 
 87. Sketch of the French Corps Diplomatique y' of 
 1809. 
 
 What ministers men must for practice use ! 
 The rash, th'ambitious, needy, desperate, 
 Foolish, and wretched, ev'n the dregs of manhood, 
 To whores and women !" 
 
 JONSON. 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 43 
 
 88. Portrait of Mr. Br'—t—n, preparing a new edi-> 
 tion of his Ar—cht — r — / Ant — q—t — 5, ^c. 
 
 An auncient book, hight Briton nioniments.'^ 
 
 Spenser. 
 
 Shall we go see the reliques of this town 
 
 Shakspeabe. 
 
 89. Portrait of S^m^l Wh^-tb—d, Esq., M. P. 
 
 A winter grasshopper all the year long, that looks 
 hack upon harvest, with a lean pair of cheeks.^' War 
 or peace, death or plenty, make him equally discon- 
 tented ; and where he finds no cause to tax the State, 
 he descends to rail against the rate of salt butter." 
 
 Sir Tho. Overrury. 
 
 Laudes, Ganse, nihil ; reprehendis cuncta, videto 
 Ne placeas nulli, dum tibi nemo placet.'' 
 
 Martial.^ 
 
 " Sure he was a man of mickle might, 
 Had he had governance, it well to guide/' 
 
 Spenser. 
 
 90. A Design for the Improvement of Windsor Home 
 Parky by Col. St--v—ns—n, S — v—y—r G—n — Z. 
 
 The present sketch is altogether deficient in drawing ; 
 and except that it includes apian for converting a Lime" 
 Kiln into a Chinese Temple, exhibits no specimen of the 
 
44 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 qualifications of Col. St — v — ns— n, for his accession to 
 the honours of Wren, Chambers, and Wyatt. 
 
 Opifer. 
 
 This is so wretched a performance that the com- 
 mittee could not justify it's admission, by the utmost 
 stretch of their obedience to the wishes of the C — rt. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 91. Portrait of Mr. Co — tes in a proposed new cha- 
 racter, 
 
 Ingenui vultus puer, ingenuique pudoris." 
 
 JUVENAL.^7 
 
 • ^ — I'll tell quaint lies, 
 
 How honourable ladies sought my love. 
 Which I denying, they fell sick, and died.'' 
 
 Shakspeare. 
 
 " Tu fai come la simia, che piu va in alto, piu mostra 
 il cula/' 
 
 Ital. Prov.4^^ 
 
 P£. Bust of the Rev. Dr. P — rr. 
 II se croit un grand homme, et fit une preface." 
 
 GlLBERT.^9 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 4o 
 
 93. A Converzatione at H — U—^d H e. 
 
 (The Hostess speaks.) 
 
 Which o' your poets? Petrarch, or Tasso? or 
 Dante? 
 
 Guerrini? Ariosto ? Aretine? 
 
 Cieco di Hadria ? I have read them all." 
 
 " I would have 
 
 A Lady, indeed, t'have all, letters and arts, 
 Be able to discourse, to write, to paint." 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 94. Elevation of Westminster Bridge ^ as it is intended 
 to appear when the alterations began in 1813, shall be 
 compleatly executed. By the Ar — h — t to the Bridge. 
 
 Hold, Ponticide, thy hand." 
 
 " Ne sutor ultra crepidam." 
 
 Prov. Ap. Plin.^^ 
 
 How is it that the national structures, which are the 
 great features by which cotemporary and future nations 
 will estimate our taste— How is it, that they are intrusted 
 to thesuperintendance of judgments totally uninformed, 
 to the vigilance of minds whose greatest exercise has 
 been to mark the infringements of the building act, and 
 which have rarely looked beyond the districts allotted to 
 them by the County Magistrates? That this design is not 
 a mere ideal reformation, the testimony of the Gentle- 
 man's Magazine gives melancholy evidence. The spo- 
 liation has begun ; under what authority, ought to be 
 
46 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 examined. The simplicity and majestic character of 
 this master-piece of its day are to be removed, and its 
 masculine features tricked out with a variety of conceits 
 and fancied improvements. The commissioners for the 
 preservation of the bridge must answer these charges at 
 their peril. 
 
 I should recommend that L — d Ellenborough^s act for 
 cutting and maiming be extended to our public build- 
 ings, and that this soi-disant architect and his abettors, 
 be indicted for felony against the national taste. 
 
 OPIFER. 
 
 95. Portrait.— An English Tourist visiting les ani* 
 mauxferoces'^ at the ^' Jardin des Plantes'^ at Paris. 
 
 Ubi convenissent ursi, 
 Propinquanti duo horum 
 Parum studiosi morum, 
 Subligacula dente petunt, 
 Quo posteriora foetent." 
 
 Drunken Barnaby/' 
 
 He shall have his 
 
 Adventures put i' th' Book of Voyages'' 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 96. Portrait of Admiral H—'ll—w—ll. 
 
 " They left me to-a bootless Inquisition." 
 
 Shakspeare. 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 47 
 
 97. Full length Portrait of S—r J—s Sh—Wy Alder- 
 man. 
 
 Was there ever such a two yards of Knighthood 
 measured out by Time, to be sold to Laughter ? a mere 
 talking mole. — Hang him ! 
 
 JoNSON. 
 
 The corruption of a citizen may beget a courtier." 
 
 Chapman. 
 
 This canvas and massy frame would occupy a space 
 in the exhibition room that must be given to those of 
 greater men. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 98. View of the interior of Covent-Garden Theatre, 
 
 Quatuor aut plures aulaea premuntur in horas; 
 Dum fugiunt equitum tumse, peditumque catervae : 
 Mox trahitur manibus regum fortuna retortis ; 
 Esseda festinant, pilenta, petorrita, naves : 
 Captivum portatur ebur, captiva Corinthus. 
 Si foret in terris, rideret Democritus ; seu 
 Diversum confusa genus panthera camelo, 
 Sive elephas albus vulgi converteret ora : 
 Spectaret populum ludis attentius ipsis, 
 TJt sibi praebentem mimo spectacula plura/^ 
 
 HORACE,^^ 
 
48 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 99- Portraits of the Rt. Hon. Messrs. C. B—th—t, 
 and F. J. R—b^s—n. 
 
 " Nous pouvous paroitre grands dans un emploi au* 
 dessous de notre merite ; mais nous paroissons souvent 
 petits dans un emploi plus grand que nous/' 
 
 Ro C H EFOU C AU LT." 
 
 100. L— J JK—s— 6—1/, (Miniature.) 
 
 Quam Rosa spiravit ! sed odoribiis Aquilo flavit, 
 Et rugas retulit quas meminisse dolet." 
 
 Barnaby Harrington. 5* 
 
 101. Portrait of S—r F. B—rd—t, bart. 
 
 A fallen angel." 
 
 Milton. 
 
 This is not a new subject, it should have been hung 
 on the death of John Home Tooke. 
 
 Hangman, 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES, 49 
 
 102. Bust, in bronze, of Dr. S—l — m— w ofL—v--p'-f^ 
 Compounder of the celebrated B — m of Gil — d. 
 
 All his ingredients 
 
 Are a sheep's gail, a roasted bitches marrow, 
 Some few sod earwigs, pounded caterpillars, 
 A little capon's grease, and fasting spittle : 
 I know 'em to a dram." 
 
 (The Doctor speaks.) 
 
 " Tis the secret 
 
 Of Nature, naturiz'd 'gainst all infections. 
 
 Cures all diseases, coming of all causes ; 
 
 A month's grief in a day ; a year's in twelve ; 
 
 And of what age soever, in a month ; 
 
 Past all the doses of your drugging doctors." 
 
 Its virtue 
 
 Can confer honour, love, respect, long life. 
 Give safety, valour, yea and victory." 
 
 r ^' Philosophers 
 
 By taking, once a week, on a knive's point 
 The quantity of a grain of mustard of it ; 
 Become stout Marses, and beget young Cupids." 
 
 JoNSONo 
 
 103. Portrait of the Rt. H—7i. N—s V^~t, Ch-^r 
 of the E—ch — r. 
 
 Sure every lock of grey that age has spread, 
 In rich, financial bristles o'er thy head, 
 
 E 
 
50 
 
 THE REJECTED PICTUHES, 
 
 Developed with it some congenial grace 
 
 Of wit or temper, to befit thy place : 
 
 The first that peep'd above thy curls of brown, 
 
 Despis'd the hungry honours of the gown ; 
 
 A second led thee strait from Coke and Bracton, 
 
 To puzzle o'er the wonders of a fraction; 
 
 A third, which saw how senators could count, 
 
 Declared that figures helped the dull to mount; 
 
 And last, a lock of mightiest ambition 
 
 Proclaimed the High-Dutch triumph of addition. 
 
 Oh ! gentle Van, if Nature thus ordain'd 
 
 Thy gifts to flow when others' stores are drain'd. 
 
 The self-same hand that ripen'd thee so late 1 
 
 Shall still preserve thee from the stroke of fate, J- 
 
 As slowest growers reach the longest date. j 
 
 Outliving thus a bankrupt nation^s groans, 
 
 The wreck of omnium, consols, bills and loans, 
 
 Safe shalt thou sneak off when thy course is run. 
 
 While others teach finance to count from one." 
 
 Anon. 
 
 104. Portrait of Sir F-^d—k F-^-d. 
 
 God give them wisdom that have it, and those that 
 are fools, let them use their talents." 
 
 Shakspeare. 
 
 105. Bust of the La — re — t. 
 
 * Ne vulgo narres te sudavisse ferendo 
 Carmina, quae possint oculos auresque morari 
 Caesaris." 
 
 Horace. 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 51 
 
 100. Scene in Jps—y H—e; a celebrated retreat of 
 the Loves and Graces, near Hyde Park Corner. 
 
 — Therein 
 
 A lovely bevy of fair lady sat. 
 Courted of many a jolly paramour," 
 
 Spenser. 
 
 107. Portrait of Mr. F^tzg^d, the PoeU 
 
 — Un vain caprice, un bizarre humeur 
 Pour mes pSches, je crois, me fit devenir rimeur." 
 
 BoiLEAU.*^ 
 
 108. The Effigie of a celebrated aged Banker ; painted 
 for L0-y B^rdr^t. 
 
 The man is an insufficient husband." 
 
 " Oh manhood, where art thou ? what have I come 
 to? a woman's toy at these years! Death! a bearded 
 baby for a girl to dandle ! Oh dotage, dotage.'' 
 
 CONGKEVE. 
 
 109. A series of Models^ in clay^ of all the Crowned 
 Heads in Europe. 
 
 All their actions are governed by crude opinion, with- 
 out reason, or cause. They know not why they do any 
 thing ; but as they are informed, believe, judge, praise, 
 condemn, love^liate, and in emulation of one another, 
 
 E 2 
 
52 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 do all these things alike. Only they have a natural 
 inclination sways 'em generally to the worst, when they 
 are left to themselves. 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 Omitted, from a respectful and necessary attention, 
 &c. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 1 10. Head of the Ar — hb^s?i—p of C— 5s— /. 
 
 " Magis magni clerici non sunt magis sapientes."^7 
 
 111. The Continence of Scipio/' painted for the 
 Marquis of H — d — t, by Mr. S — h—g. 
 
 There is something irresistibly ludicrous in this com- 
 position. Whether the artist taxed himself to the exe- 
 cution of so grave a subject as a penance for his former 
 loose doings, and yet could not help throwing in a spice 
 of his habitual taste,— or w^hether his noble patron 
 instructed him how to make something sly and liquorish 
 out of the most dignified situations, it is pretty clear 
 that their individual or mutual labours have produced 
 no unfit ornament for the Temple of Cytherea. The 
 Spanish Princess bears a slight resemblance to a mo- 
 dern oyster-wench of Billingsgate, and her genu- 
 flections are so nicely studied, and her drapery so 
 pleasingly arranged, that very few of her beauties are 
 left to the conqueror's imagination. The stale moral 
 of the story is thus happily kicked out; for according 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 53 
 
 to this artist's notions, or at least representation of 
 beauty, it is evident that the forbearance of Scipio was 
 more a matter of taste than of virtue. We cannot quit 
 this performance vi^ithout doing justice to three of the 
 figures in the groupe of by-standers, which, from their 
 spirit and individuality, we apprehend to be portraits. 
 The one who stands in the fore-ground, as if he were 
 of a superior rank to his companions, represents a 
 portly, muddy-complexioned, black-whiskered gentle- 
 man of fifty-five, who rolls his eyes towards the fair 
 captive with a most significant leer, which seems to 
 indicate a thousand soft recollections of former plea- 
 sures ; the second, is a younger, vacant-looking, san- 
 guine-haired courtier, who participates very warmly in 
 all the feelings of his portly companion, and copies his 
 attitudes with great minuteness ; the last is a very 
 reverend, grey-haired sort of debauchee, who winks 
 upon the other tvvo, as if they had all seen strange things 
 in their time, which had taught them a most sovereign 
 contempt of Scipio's morality. The Celtiberian Prince, 
 who is receiving his mistress from the virtuous Roman, 
 is a spare and shrivelled figure, who completes the ar- 
 tist's intention of rendering the story ridiculous. The 
 colouring of this piece is in the usual gaudy and flutter- 
 ing style which has so deservedly recommended Mr. 
 S— h — g to the patronage of C— t— n H— e. 
 
 Opifeb. 
 
 iEquum est induere nuptam ventum texilem ? 
 Palam praestare nudam in nebula lineSi 
 
 PuBLius 
 
54 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 Magister artis ingenique largitor, 
 
 Venter." Persius.^9 
 
 Dost thou love pictures ? we will fetch thee straight, 
 Adonis painted by a murmuring brook. 
 And Cytherea all in sedges hid." 
 
 Wherefore have these gifts a curtain before them 
 
 Shaksfea^e. 
 
 A proper respect for the decorum of the Exhibition 
 induced the Committee to request Mr. S — h — g to with- 
 draw his historical caricature. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 112. Portrait of S—r J. S — nc — r, B — t., Compiler 
 of the C — de of H—lth and L — ng — v — ti/. 
 
 In his brain. 
 Which is as dry as the remainder biscuit 
 After a voyage, he hath strange places cramn^'d 
 With observation, the which he vents 
 In mangled forms.'' 
 
 Shakspeare. 
 
 113. X — d D — I — exhorting the Populace at Maid- 
 stone to petition for the Corn BilL 
 
 So having said, awhile he stood, expecting 
 Their universal shout and high applause 
 To fill his ear ; when, contrary, he hears 
 On all sides, from innumerable tongues. 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 65 
 
 A dismal universal hiss, the sound 
 Of public scorn/' 
 
 Milton. 
 
 He hath eloquence enough to save his two-pence/* 
 
 OVERBURY. 
 
 114. A Piece of Still Life, in the Style of Mr. 
 Heaphy. 
 
 " Urceoli, peloes, sartago^ patellae." 
 
 Juvenal.^® 
 
 The Academy encourages no rival exhibitions. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 115. Portrait of the Hon, Wm. S—ff—ng — n. 
 
 O, that's a precious mannikin !" 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 " There is a confederacy between him and his clothes, 
 to be made a puppy.'' 
 
 OvERBURY. 
 
 116. Portrait of Her R 1 H «s the P s of 
 
 W s. 
 
 *^ I have many enemies in Orsino's court.'' 
 
 Shakspeare. 
 
 We do not know how long this picture may have 
 been painted, but certainly the colours have very mate- 
 
56 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 rially faded* We understand that it has been lately 
 exposed to a foreign atmosphere, and this may have 
 produced an effect not altogether agreeable to English 
 vision. 
 
 Opifer, 
 
 Omitted, from a respectful and necessary attention, 
 &c., &c. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 117. Portrait of r H B—te D'-^-dl—y. 
 
 ''The mirrour of knighthood, and pink of courtesie 
 in the age." 
 
 CONGREVE. 
 
 Hum 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 118. Bust of W—lt—r Sc~tty Esq., Poet, Editor, 
 
 " Travaillez pour la gloire, et qu'un sordide gain 
 
 Ne soit jamais Fobjet d'un illustre ecrivain ; 
 
 Je sais qu'un noble esprit pent, sans honteet sans crime, 
 
 Tirer de son travail un tribut legitime ; 
 
 Mais je ne puis souffrir ces auteurs renommes 
 
 Qui, degoutes de gloire, et d'argent affames, 
 
 Mettent leur Apollon aux gages d'un libraire, 
 
 Et font d'un art divin un metier mercenaire."' 
 
 BOILEAU.^* 
 
 r 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 57 
 
 1 19. Head of D—x^n, Esq., Slopseller, London. 
 
 Pannus niihi panis/' 
 
 Barn. Harrington.^* 
 
 120. Portrait of R — ph D d, esq., with a distant 
 
 view of Milford Haven. 
 
 121. Plans, 2^0. of the important national invention for 
 the improvement of the present Lazaretto establishments at 
 Milford, 8^c. 
 
 D. I should be loth to draw the subtle air 
 Of such a place without my thousand aims. 
 ril not dissemble, Sir — 
 
 My means are made already — 
 
 How t'enquire, and be resolv'd, 
 
 By present demonstration, whether a ship^ 
 Newly arrived from Soria, or from 
 Any suspected part of all the Levant, 
 Be guilty of the plague : and where they use 
 To lie out forty, fifty days sometimes. 
 About the Lazaretto, for their trial, 
 I'll save that charge and loss unto the merchant, 
 And in an hour clear the doubt. 
 G. Indeed sir. 
 
 jD. Or 1 will loose my labour. 
 
 G. 'My faith, that's much. 
 
 Z). Nay, Sir, conceive me, 'twill cost me in onions 
 Some thirty livres. 
 
 G. Which is one pound sterling. 
 
SB THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 JD. Beside my water-works : for this I do, Sir, 
 First, I bring in your ship 'twixt two brick-walls: 
 (But those the State shall venture) on the one 
 1 strain me a fair tarpaulin, and in that 
 I stick my onions, cut in halfs ; the other 
 Is full of loop-holes, out at which I thrust 
 The noses of my bellows ; and those bellows 
 I keep, with water- works, in perpetual motion, 
 (Which is the easiest manner of a hundred.) 
 Now, sir, your onion, which doth naturally 
 Attract th' infection, and your bellows blowing 
 The air upon him, will shew (instantly) 
 By his chang'd colour, if there be contagion. 
 Or else remain as fair as at the first. 
 Now 'tis known, 'tis nothing. 
 
 G. You are right, sir. 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 122. The Conference of Octavius, Anthony and Xe- 
 pidus^ — A picture painted by a German Artist at the 
 command of the Emperors of Russia, and Austria, and 
 the King of Prussia. 
 
 Consentiebant Caesar Octavianus, Antonius et Le- 
 pidus."^5 
 
 The artist has seized the moment in which this tri- 
 umvirate agree to divide the sovereignty of the world. 
 Octavius is tracing out the extent of the Roman empire 
 on the sand, and each is pointing with bis sword to the 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 division which he is prepared to claim for himself. A 
 suspicious cunning and a remorseless ambition are very 
 strongly depicted in the features of the several cha- 
 racters. 
 
 Opifer. 
 
 We feared some political allusion. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 1£3. Sketch of the Painting Room of a Keeper of the 
 R^l A—d—y. 
 
 His chamber was dispainted all within, 
 With sundry colours, in the which were writ 
 Infinite shapes of things dispersed thin ; 
 Some such as in the world were never yet, 
 Ne can devised be of mortal wit : 
 Some daily seen and knowen by their names. 
 Such as in idle fantasies do flit; 
 Infernal hags, centaurs, fiends, hippodames, 
 Apes, lions, eagles, owls, fools, lovers, children, dames." 
 
 Spenser. 
 
 Mr. F— s— li having some private objections to the 
 exhibition of this picture, it was rejected in compliment 
 to him. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
60 THE REJECTED PICTURES- 
 
 124. The Discovert/ of Bruce ^ from the Lord of 
 the Isles.'^ 
 
 Then upsprung many a mainland lord, 
 Obedient to their chieftain's word. 
 Barcaldine's arm is high in air. 
 And Kinlock Altine's blade is bare. 
 Black Murthok's dirk has left its sheath, 
 And ciench'd is Dermid's hand of death. 
 Their mutter'd threats of vengeance swell 
 Into a wild and warlike yell ; 
 Onward they press with weapons high, 
 Th' affrighted females shriek and fly." 
 
 Scott. 
 
 Ecce iterum Crispinus.'' 
 
 JUVENAL.^^ 
 
 There is something about this picture which we can- 
 not understand ; upon the whole, we are inclined to be- 
 lieve it a piece of gothic pannelling, representing some 
 quarrel of knight-errantry, which, falling into the hands 
 of a modern artist, has been partially painted over, and 
 most profusely varnished, to produce an odd effect, for 
 the amusement of a certain class of fashionable ama- 
 teurs. Certain it is that the very soul of Mr. Scott was 
 never so accurately embodied, even in the elaborate 
 designs which have been uniformly tacked on to his ela- 
 borate works. Mr. S. has certainly many rich and pe- 
 culiar graces, he has much in him to make a poet ; but 
 thenfve works all in the same strain ! Is it not possible 
 for him to get into another track, or would he fall into 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 61 
 
 a quagmire, were he to step out of the road by way of 
 experiment ? If all this Scottish chivalry is to float down 
 the stream of time," Amadis de Gaul and his multi- 
 farious brethren have a tolerable chance again. 
 
 OPIFEK. 
 
 125. Portrait of the Editor of the M g C cle. 
 
 He has received weekly intelligence, upon my 
 knowledge, out of the low countries (from all parts of 
 the world) in cabbages^ 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 126. Bust of Napoleo7i Bonaparte, 
 
 Ce monstre impetueux, sanguinaire, inflexible, 
 De ses esclaves meme est I'ennemi terrible. 
 Aux malheurs des mortels il borne ses desseins, 
 Le sang de son parti rougit souvent ses mains ; 
 II habite en tyran dans les coeurs qu' il d^chire, 
 Et lui-m6me il punit les forfaits qu' il inspire.'' 
 
 VoLTAIRE,^^ 
 
 127. View of the Excavations at Herculaneum. 
 
 Thesaurus Carbones erant." 
 
 Bland- Prov.^ 
 
62 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 128. Group of Tourists in France— Portraits -^-vide 
 Quarterly Review. 
 
 (Mr. W- r speaks.) 
 
 This is my diary 
 
 Wherein I note my actions of the da3^ 
 
 ^ JSfotandum. 
 
 A rat had gnavv'd my spur-leathers ; notwithstanding 
 
 I put on new, and did go forth. 
 
 Item. 
 
 I went and bought two tooth-picks ; by the way 
 
 I cheapened sprats ; and at St. Mark's I urin'd. 
 R. Taith these are politick notes ! W. Sir, I do slip 
 
 No action of my life thus, but I quote it. 
 R. Believe me it is wise ! 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 129. Miniature of Miss G — dsm-^d. 
 There's twelve thousand pounds, Tom.'' 
 
 CoNGREVE. 
 
 ISO. Portrait of L-^d E—k—e, painted in J 800. 
 
 Faith that is I.— What I ? 
 
 I per se, I, great I." — 
 
 John Davies of Hereford. 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 63 
 
 131. The Assembly of the Embassadors at Congress — 
 Portraits, 
 
 They are the only knowing men of Europe, 
 Great general scholars, excellent physicians, 
 Most admir'd statesmen, profest favourites 
 And cabinet counsellors to the greatest princes. 
 The only languag'd men of all the world ! 
 — And I have heard, they are most lewd impostors 
 Made of all terms and shreds." 
 
 JONSON, 
 
 The utter absence of all truth, consistency and har- 
 mony in the principal figures, rendered this picture ex- 
 tremely disgusting. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 132. Portrait of the Editor of the Cr—t—l zv. 
 
 On croiroit, k vous voir dans vos libres caprices 
 Discourir en Caton des vertus et des vices. 
 Decider du merite et du prix des auteurs, 
 Et fait impunement la le§on aux docteurs, 
 Qu' etant seul a couvert des traits de la satire, 
 Vous avez tout pouvoir de parler et d' ecrire, 
 Mais moi, qui dans le fond sais bien ce que j'en crois. 
 Qui compte tous les jours vos defauts par mes doigts^ 
 Je ris quand je vous vois, si foible et si sterile 
 Prendre sur vous le soin de reformer la ville.'^ 
 
 BoiLEAU.^ 
 
64 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 133. The L-'d H h Ch r, of E d, and his 
 
 Wife, a family piece. 
 
 (The Lady speaks.) 
 
 Do I allow you your half-crown a day to spend 
 where you will, to vex and torment me at such times as 
 these ? who gives you your maintenance, 1 pray you ? 
 who allows you your horse-meat and man's-meat ? your 
 three sutes of apparel a year ? your four pair of stockins, 
 one silk, three worsted 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 ( Caucellarius loquitur,) 
 
 " [lie ego sum qui quondam, 
 Crines, mores, vestes nondum * 
 Sunt mutatae, nam recessi, 
 Calceamentis queis discessi, 
 Neque pectine usus fui 
 Sic me meis j uvat frui/' 
 
 Drunken Barnaby.^^ 
 
 Omitted, from a respectful and necessary attention, 
 &c., 
 
 Hangman. 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 6f> 
 
 134. Portrait of S~^r T. L—wr—e. 
 
 Why now let me die, for I have lived long enough ; 
 this is the period of my ambition.'* 
 
 " Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and 
 some have greatness thrust upon them.'* 
 
 Shakspeare. 
 
 The recent varnish, not being dry, smelt too strong 
 for the Academy* 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 135. Portrait of L^d M e. 
 
 '^He was a man of few words, and of great com- 
 pliance, and usually delivered that as his opinion, which 
 he foresaw would be grateful to the King." 
 
 Clarendon. 
 
 136. Portrait of G / S- — rr — z-- n, in his exile. 
 
 " I do love 
 To note, and to observe, though I live out 
 Free from the active torrent ; yet I'd mark 
 The currents and the passages of things 
 For mine own private use, and know the ebbs 
 And flows of state." 
 
 JONSDN, 
 
66 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 137. Medea renewing the age of jEson. 
 
 — abeunt pallorque, situsque ; 
 
 Adjectoque cavse supplenlur sanguine venae; 
 Membraque luxuriant. iEson miratur, et olim 
 Ante quater denos hunc se reminiscitur annos.'' 
 
 This picture is a copy from a beautiful gem in the 
 cabinet of the P — e R — t. The oriijinal is often sazed 
 at with a mixed feeling of envy and self-deception. 
 There is an enchantress who revives the feats of youth 
 
 in a R 1 body ; but alas ! she has not the power of 
 
 Medea. S — r T. L— -wr — e has approached the nearest 
 to her miraculous skill, as the present exhibition abun- 
 dantly testifies. But what avails the youth of unsj^m- 
 pathising canvas^ beyond the gratification of a passing 
 vanity ! 
 
 Opifer. 
 
 Omitted; from a respectful and necessary attention, 
 &c., &c. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 138. Portrait of a celebrated Anti-ministerial Trium- 
 virate, Messrs. W d, P and T -y. 
 
 " The first of them could things to come foresee; 
 The next, could of things present best advise; 
 The third, things past could keep in memory/^ 
 
 Babblers of folly, and blazers of crime." 
 
 Spenser. 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 67 
 
 139. Portrait of a Ladtf, in the style of S — r W. 
 B 
 
 Iteai^ two lips indifferent red ; item, two grey eyes 
 with lids to them ; item, one neck, one chin, and so 
 forth/' Shakspeare. 
 
 140. Portrait ofW m C—b—t, Esq. 
 
 A man of large profession, that could speak 
 
 To every cause, and things mere contraries, 
 Till all was hoarse again, yet all be law ; 
 That, with most quick agility, could turn 
 And return ; make knots and undo them ; 
 Give forked counsel; take provoking gold 
 On either hand, and put it up."— 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 As there are mountebanks for the natural body, 
 so thei'e are mountebanks for the politic body." 
 
 Bacon. 
 
 II a des reproches qui louent, et des louanges qui 
 medisent/' Rochefoucalt.7^ 
 
 141. Head of W. Th — -d, Esq., R. A,, intended 
 for Messrs. R — nd — // and Co,, Ludgate Hill, and not 
 for the Royal Academy. 
 
 " A certain man, a silversmith, which made silver 
 shrines for Diana, and brought no small gain unto the 
 craftsmen." 
 
 St. Paul. 
 
 F 2 
 
68 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 142. Elevation of the Alms-Houses erected at Hackney, 
 
 by S / Ji—b—ns—n, Esq., ofG—t S—rr—y St—t, 
 
 Bl—kfr—rs. 
 
 Si Ton vient a chercher pour quel secret myst^re 
 
 Alidor ^ ses frais bS^tit un monastere ; 
 
 C'est un homine d'honneur, de pi6t6 profonde, 
 
 Et qui veut rendre a Dieu, ce qu'il a pris du monde. 
 
 BOILEAV J' 
 
 143. Statue of L — d L — n — d — ch. 
 
 I have no urns, no dusty monuments, 
 No broken images of ancestors 
 Wanting an ear, or nose ; no forged tables 
 Of long descents, to boast false honours from : 
 Or be my undertakers to my trust; 
 
 But a new man 
 
 Whom you have dig?iify'd." 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 144. View of N — eh — m H—e, the seat of the E—t 
 ofH—c—ty 18J4. 
 
 Like some lone Chartreux, stands the good old hall, 
 Silence without, and fasts within, the wall; 
 No rafter'd roofs with dance and tabor sound, 
 No noontide bell invites the country round ; 
 Tenants with sighs the smokeless tow'rs survey, 
 And turn th' unwilling steeds another way ; 
 Benighted wanderers, the forest o'er. 
 Curse the sav'd candle, and unop'ning door ; 
 While the gaunt mastiff growling at the gate, 
 Affrights the beggar whom he longs to eat/' 
 
 Pope. 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 69 
 
 145. Head of the Rev. G. Cr — bb — , Author of the 
 Un auteur a genoux, dans une humble preface.*' 
 
 146. The Design of a Monument to commemorate the 
 Public Services of the late Lord Nelson. To be erected 
 in the Sea at Yarmouth, near the Shore of his Native 
 County. 
 
 On the extremity of a winding mole, considerably 
 advanced in the sea, is built a colossal statue of the 
 great admiral, in the act of conteniplaiing the Ocean, 
 erect, and one hundred and thirty feet high ! Beneath 
 his feet, and so composed as to form an extensive base, 
 are the prows of the ships taken by him from the ene- 
 my. The star on his left breast is to be illuminated 
 during the night as a Pharos for mariners. 
 
 By day a pillar of a cloud, to lead them the way ; 
 and by night a pillar of fire, to give them light: to go 
 by day and night/' 
 
 Moses. 
 
 Though Nelson will have 
 
 A statue. 
 
 Not wrought by time, but rooted in the minds 
 Of all posterity ; when brass, and marble. 
 Aye, and the Capitol itself, is dust!" 
 
 Still, the erection of public monuments to his fame is 
 
70 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 honourable to his memory, and beneficial to his coun-» 
 try. At the present moment, the mode of executing 
 them is all that deserves attention. 
 
 Public monuments of every age, erected to indivi- 
 duals, have generally failed in their principal object, 
 when architecture alone has designed their forms. Her 
 characteristic details were ever extremely few, and pro- 
 duced rather by the influence of material and climate, 
 than by the physical or moral habits of man. The 
 three classes of Egyptian, Grecian, and Gothic archi- 
 tecture would include nearly every variety, and if so, 
 diffused as they are, more or less, through every country, 
 they can no longer be able to convey to posterity the 
 traits of any nation exclusively, still less of any indivi- 
 dual, however illustrious. Temples, columns, obelisks, 
 have served to commemorate Egyptians, Persians, 
 Greeks, Romans, Germans, French, English, and the 
 natives of the New Continent; they have recorded the 
 virtues and vices of patriots and legislators and kings 
 and conquerors of every dimension, so long as their 
 inscriptions have existed. What paucity of invention 
 does it then discover to continue this eternal and undis- 
 tinguishing repetition ! What an improvident waste of 
 means for the purpose of exhibiting a perishable in- 
 scription only, or at the most a few basso-relievos ! 
 
 The committee for the county monument of Lord 
 Nelson have fallen into this error, and it is greatly to 
 be lamented. J hey have proposed to honour his me- 
 mory by a column ! A form of all others the least no- 
 vel ; the most unimpressive when standing alone ; and 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 71 
 
 of which there are aheady instances far beyond their 
 means of imitation. In greatness of parts they can 
 never dare to exceed the Monument of London. In 
 abundance or excellence of decoration, all emulation is 
 hopeless with the Trajan Column at Rome, or that in 
 the Place Vendorae at Paris. In singularity of mate- 
 rial, the pillar now building at Moscow will ever bid 
 them a proud defiance. Still, in their wisdom and taste, 
 they have selected an Athenian Doric Column ! In the 
 name of common sense, (who certainly was not present 
 at the decision,) what has an Athenian Doric Column 
 in common with the character, or profession, or actions, 
 of Nelson ? with the country he saved, or the age he 
 rendered illustrious? The Athenians were not a mari- 
 time nation I The Dorians vvere a peaceful people! 
 And there is no instance of the Grecians having vio- 
 lated propriety and good taste by the erection of an in- 
 sulated Doric Column ! To whom, then, ought the 
 county of Norfolk to dedicate this trophy of absurdity? 
 
 Works of this nature should have for their object, 
 the preservation of that individuality of character which 
 must have respectively belonged to the eminent persons 
 they are designed to immortalize, together with its ac- 
 companying circumstances of time, profession, nation, 
 &c. To express this, architecture has no powers; 
 sculpture alone has the means to embody it, but then, not 
 that vitiated practice of it, which has lately prevailed, 
 which exposed the still-existing Napoleon naked to the 
 ridicule of all Paris ; and placed an English philanthro- 
 pist, disguised as one of the Pagan conquerors of the 
 
72 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 world in the Christian church of St. Paul. It demands 
 a chastened and judicious taste to model modern dress 
 into beautiful forms, but it may be done ; and this as* 
 sertion is confirmed by the successful efforts of one 
 English sculptor,* whose merits now command the 
 praise, as they have long enjoyed the envy of his co- 
 temporary artists. 
 
 It is for such a mind to realize, what the design under 
 consideration appears to suggests — the erection of a mo- 
 nument, which by its excellence in the just expression 
 of character should have the name of Nelson appHed to 
 it, and that name only, through all future ages— that if 
 4 buried in the sands by the revolutions of nature, and 
 again recovered in the most remote period, should be 
 recognised (if history or tradition still existed) as the 
 statue of the English Admiral. This, it must be acknow- 
 ledged, is no ordinary task, but Art has succeeded in 
 giving immortality to names by this means. The 
 Apollo, on its reappearance, received its ancient title, 
 even among the followers of another religion ; and if 
 such perfect singleness of character be possessed by this 
 statue, so that it can be mistaken for no other being, real 
 or imaginary, of any age, why should modern artists, or 
 modern patrons, be content with imperfect and ambi- 
 guous memorials ? 
 
 The grandeur of thought in this design, and the 
 poetical idea of its Pharos, are extremely imposing. 
 Amidst darkness, and danger, and death, a spark from 
 the bosom of this intrepid seaman would still animate 
 
 * Mr. Ch— ntr— y. 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 73 
 
 the drooping mariner ; would still excite him to his 
 wonted daring ; and be the means of his preservation. 
 In calmer hours, its radiance would be a faithful remem- 
 brancer^ and, overwhelmed with the recollections of the 
 mighty hero, the sailor's heart would swell with exulta- 
 tion at that great name" being compatriot with his 
 own." Placed in the nursery of British seamen, this 
 boast of Albion would unite with their earliest associa- 
 tions, the history of his great actions would be their 
 Primer, and the splendour of his fame light them on to 
 the same career of glory. 
 
 It is by attributes and effects like these, that this 
 work should stand an object of national admiration and* 
 foreign curiosity. Its importance should be such, that 
 every Englishman would feel constrained to make a 
 pilgrimage to its base, once, at least, in his life ; and no 
 stranger consider his visit to this country complete till 
 he had carried to it his tribute of admiration. Monu- 
 ments of such commanding attractions are those 
 
 Per quae spiritus et vita redit bonis 
 Post mortem ducibus." 
 
 HORACE.75 
 
 And yet such have Englishmen, the friends of Nelson, 
 the masters of the sea; such have thet/ rejected for — 
 
 AN ATHENIAN DORIC COLUMN/ 
 
 Opifer. 
 
 It is only necessary to remark, that the sculptor 
 praised, and in whom the design originated, s not 
 R. A. nor A. R. A. nor any such thing. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
74 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 147. Napoleon Buonaparte meditating the Invasion of 
 Russia. 
 
 " Here's some villainy afoot, 
 He is so thoughtful." 
 
 CONGREVE. 
 
 I would not go through open doors, but break 'em^ 
 Swim to my ends through blood, or build a bridge 
 Of carcases ; make on upon the heads 
 Of men, struck down like piles, to reach the lives 
 Of those remain and stand." 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 148. Bust o/R. S~th—y, Esq., Poet, Sfc. 
 
 — — docteur en style dur 
 Qui passe pour sublime a force d'etre obscur." 
 
 149. Portrait of His R / H $ the P-^e 
 
 JJ painted in the year 1812. 
 
 Omnium consensu, capax imperii, nisi imperasset.^' 
 
 Tacitus.75 
 
 This was look'd for at your hand, and this was baulk'd." 
 
 Shakspeare. 
 
 There is a portrait in the present Exhibition, by an 
 eminent R. A. in which more justice is done to his 
 R -1 H s. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 75 
 
 2 50. Portrait of S—r V y G—s. 
 
 A man of years, yet fresh, as mote appear. 
 Of svvarth complexion, and of crabbed hue, 
 That him full of melancholy did shew ; 
 Bent hollow beetle brows, sharp staring eyes.'' 
 
 Spenser. 
 
 151. jin Allegorical Representation of the Majorities 
 of the two H s of P — rl 1. 
 
 (The M— St— rs speak.) 
 " Flatter 'em both, and you may take their under- 
 standings in a purse net. They all believe themselves 
 to be just such as we make 'em, neither more nor less. 
 They have nothing, not the use of their senses, but by 
 tradition." 
 
 JONSON, 
 
 152. Bust of a Legislator. S — r W m C — rt — s, 
 
 one of the Representatives of the City of L — nd — n. 
 
 placide, plene, plane 
 
 Fregi frontem Prisciani !" 
 
 Drunken Barnaby.^^ 
 
 I very much approve, Gentlemen, of the education 
 of the poor ; I shall therefore propose as a toaht^ Gen- 
 tlemen, the three i?s : — JReading, Waiting, and Arith- 
 metic !" 
 
 S — R W — LL — M, 
 
 as Chairman at a Lancasterian Dinner. 
 
76 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 There's more elegancy in the false spelling of this 
 , than in all Cicero." 
 
 CONGREVE. 
 
 Hagdera laeta bono non est suspensa falerno 
 Thyrsus enim Bacchi, Barnabae nasus erit. 
 Non opus est Thyrso, non fronde virent cupressi 
 Si non Thyrsus erit, Barnabae nasus olet." 
 
 Deunken Barnaby."^^ 
 
 Le satire ne sert qu' a rendre unfat illustre.'" 
 
 Boileau.^^ 
 
 153. Judas betraying Christ. 
 
 This is a tolerable picture by a young English stu- 
 dent, who has lately returned from Paris. It was 
 painted in that capital for Marshal Ney, who, wishing 
 to pay some designing compliment to the English, chose 
 to patronize this painier, by giving him an order for a 
 scriptural composition. The subject was left in the ar- 
 tist's own hands. Unfortunately he had not finished his 
 work till the Marshal was leaving Paris after his cele- 
 brated interview with the King. This picture was thus 
 presented at an unlucky moment; the painter lost his 
 customer, and the Marshal his temper. 
 
 Opifer. 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 77 
 
 154. Portrait of the D^e of N' k. 
 
 " Diem totum stertebat/' 
 
 HORACE.79 
 
 Thou dost not snore distinctly, 
 
 There's meaning in thy snores/' 
 
 Shakspeare. 
 
 155. The Boudoir of W — rw—ck H—e at midnight. 
 Portraits of the P — ss, her Father, and JL—y Cl—f—d, 
 
 P — ss. " Shall I have a barricado made against my 
 friends, to be barr'd of any pleasure they can bring in to 
 me with honourable visitation ? 
 
 P — . O! Amazonian impudence ! 
 
 C — . Nay faith, in this sir, she speaks but reason, and 
 methinks is more continent than you." 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 156. Portrait of the Rev, — JV — rth of Hackney, Au- 
 thor of a Tract against the Bible Society. 
 
 Disputandi pruritics ecclesise scabies.'^ 
 
 Sir H. Wotton.^'^ 
 
 157. Portraits of Messieurs Sm — ths, Authors of the 
 R—j—ct—d Ads—s; H~r—ce in L—nd — n; and 
 some unsuccessful dramatic works. 
 
 Presque tous ces gens qui imitent avec tant d'esprit j 
 
78 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 en ont eux-ni^mes tres-peu, et quand ils cessent d'etre 
 le personage qu' ils ont choisi^ et vous amuse tant, ils 
 deviennent insipides et tristes, parce qu' ils ne sont plus 
 qu' eux. 
 
 158. A Scene at Epsom Races — after the manner of 
 Mr. Wilkie. 
 
 Ambubaiarum collegia, pharmacopolse, 
 Mendici; mimse, balatrones." 
 
 Horace.^'' 
 
 This artist, like many others, believes he completely 
 imitates Mr. Wilkie, when he puts low characters in 
 ludicrous situations. He forgets, that looking into the 
 recesses of the human heart, that accurate delineation of 
 simple humour and powerful feeling, which has placed 
 Mr. W. amongst the most thinking artists of our nation. 
 We have no desire to compare this gentleman with 
 Hoganh, they do not move in parallel lines : the one is 
 the historian of artificial society, with all its evil pas- 
 sions and habits, disgraces, and miseries ; the other de- 
 votes his pencil to the unconstrained and artless expres- 
 sions of joy, grief, love, affection, modesty, and pre- 
 sumption, wliich burst out through the light drapery of 
 rustic hfe. Mr. Wilkie always produces some pleasing 
 and improving sympathy, and yet he has been compared 
 to Teniers, that eternal painter of drunken boors. Most 
 heartily do we vvisli that he had the colouring of the 
 Dutch school ; but in all that regards the choice of sub- 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 79 
 
 ject and the interest of composition, we should as soon 
 thing of preferring Skelton to Crabbe in poetry, as of 
 degrading Mr. Wilkie by such a comparison. 
 
 Opifer. 
 
 159. Portrait of Kw—l — s, Esq,, C — m — n 
 
 S'-rg — t of the City ofL — nd — n. 
 
 . Dost thou despair, my little Nab, 
 
 Knowing what the Doctor has set down for thee. 
 And seeing so many of the City dubb'd ?" 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 160. Bust of the late Hon. C. Gr^v—Ue. 
 
 He was a Man." 
 
 Shakspeare. 
 
 161. Portraits of the Hon. F. e, (brother of the 
 
 above ) and his wife the D — w—g — r C s ofM — sf — d^ 
 
 the prtstnt Patrons of Milford, South Wales. 
 
 For the meaning of the word Patron, vide Johnson's 
 celebrated letter to the late Lord Chesterfield. 
 
 Opifer. 
 
 Women, and men hke women, are timid, vindictive, 
 and irresolute; their passions counteract each other, 
 and make the same creature at one moment, hateful, 
 at another, contemptible." 
 
 <f Why did you not follow the example of your wor- 
 thy brother 
 
 Junius, to the late Lord Mansfield. 
 
80 
 
 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 162. Portrait of the E — / of F-f—, painted at Paris, 
 
 I protest it was no salt design 
 Of seeing countries, shifting a religion, 
 Nor any disaffection to the state 
 Where I was bred, hath brought me out ; much less 
 That idle, antique, stale, grey-headed project 
 Of knowing men's minds and manners. 
 
 But 
 
 . to observe. 
 
 To quote, to learn the language, and so forth.'* 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 163. The Knights of the New Order of the B—h, re- 
 ceiving the last honour from the hands of the L — d 
 Ch — mb — n's Solicitor. Painted for C — n H—e. 
 
 Your Knighthood shall be sued for its fees to exe- 
 cution, and not be redeemed." 
 
 JoNSON. 
 
 164. Sketch of a Civic Jfter-dinner.-^ Scene, Mansion 
 House, East er- Monday. 
 
 Implentur veteris Bacchi, pinguisque farinas.'^ 
 
 VlRG.^^ 
 
 165. Roderick exercising himself in religious mortifi* 
 cation. From Mr. Southefs Roderick. 
 
 There have been strange revolutions in this artist's 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 81 
 
 style. He started as a flashy painter of heroic, and not 
 being over-critical in the choice of his subjects, con- 
 trived to pervert history very laudably ; he was observed 
 to have a particular veneration for anti-patriotic compo- 
 sitions. This failing, he tried his hand on lighter 
 themes, and produced a pretty collection of puerile, 
 feminine, bombastic, and incomprehensible cabinet pic- 
 lures. He then mounted into the sublime obscure, and, 
 wandering into the regions of uncreated being, brought 
 away such forms and fancies as might have accomplished 
 him as an inventor of mythology for unconverted na- 
 tions. Even this answered poorly, so the unfortunate 
 man was at last compelled to sink into loyalty and or- 
 thodoxy. With these he now jogs on very quietly, and 
 what with occasional approaches towards methodism, 
 and occasional attempts to immortalize the new era, 
 contrives to pick up a decent livelihood. Mr. Southey, 
 being an " ex officio'^ bard, of course demands his particu- 
 lar attention. We say nothing of that gentleman's poe- 
 try, for his muse is so fitful between her dullness and her 
 brilliancy, that we know not where to have her. We 
 hope that her tendency to the Bathos is not increasing, 
 and that she begins to recover from the torpid influence 
 of the laureh 
 
 Opifer, 
 
82 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 166. Portraits of three distinguished Intimates at 
 C nH e. 
 
 Dwarf, Fool, and Eunuch, well met here we be, 
 A question it were now, whether of us three, 
 Being all the known Delicates of a rich man, 
 In pleasing him, claim the precedency can ?" 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 167« Portrait of the Right Rev. Father in God, the 
 B — sh^p of B — r. 
 
 Hood an ass with reverend purple. 
 So you can hide his two ambitious ears. 
 And he shall pass for a cathedral doctor."' 
 
 Jon SON. 
 
 168. Portrait of Marshal Soult. 
 
 In hi» great shield was writ, with letters gay, 
 Sans Foy : full large of limb and every joint 
 He was, and cared not for God or Man a point.'' 
 
 Spenser. 
 
 " Ibericis peruste funibus latus/^ 
 
 HORACE.^^ 
 
 169. Gertrude. From Mr. Campbell. 
 
 This is a chaste and beautiful picture, and yet, it 
 has been rejected ! It may be a little too nicely finished 
 in some parts, and too negligently in others ; but there 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 83 
 
 is something irresistibly attractive in the whole. Why 
 does not Mr. Campbell furnibh nezo subjects? We hear 
 of him once in ten years, whilst Mr. Scott coii^es with 
 his annual claims upon our applause and our purses. 
 
 Opifer. 
 
 170. Portrait of S—r W—m G—r—w. 
 
 You have a gift, Sir, (thank your education) 
 Will never let you want, while there are men 
 And malice, to breed causes. Would I had 
 But half the like, for all my fortune. Sir, 
 
 If I have any suits — 
 
 I will make bold with your obstreperous aid 
 (Conceive me) for your fee, Sir," 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 171. An Allegorical Piece, in the style of Mr. Fuseli. 
 
 Fairies, black, grey, green, and white." 
 
 Shakspeare. 
 
 Chimeras all." 
 
 Dryden. 
 
 What's the complexion?— Whitish." 
 
 JONSQN. 
 
84 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 172. Portrait of an III — — s P ge, in the year 
 
 18I0» 
 
 " Tempora mutantur/'^^ 
 
 This is a picture painted soon after the date men- 
 tioned, but the better parts of the principal figure have 
 suffered so rapid a decay, that its public appearance 
 was thought very improper. Had its reputation been 
 considered, our duty shoiild have been performed upon 
 it some years ago.'^ 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 173. Portrait of a Noblemati—( Vide Cat. R. A. Ex- 
 hih, passim,) 
 
 My Lord ***** 
 
 He will not have his name known, now I think on't.'^ 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 174. The Genius of the R^y^l Jc—d—my, A De- 
 sign for an antic la7np ; by the Pr — s—d^t. 
 
 I am the servant of the court, and courtiers, Sir 
 
 CONGREVE. 
 
 This is a most curious article, and shews considerable 
 talent for invention. There is also about it an in- 
 genuity of allegory which is more than usually happy. 
 The prototype of the design has been an enormous 
 oyster, pared indeed of its rugged coat, but retaining all 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 85 
 
 its inelegance ; round its circumference are projecting 
 beaks, carrying semi-transparent glass globes. On these 
 are traced correct physiognomical likenesses of all the 
 R.As. Apollo is triumphantly stuck up against the bot- 
 tom, in such a manner, that although his rays extend to 
 every other person, they can never, by any possibility, 
 illumine the heads of the Ac — d — m — ns. 
 
 The palace of Dullness never boasted so appropriate 
 a piece of furniture ; or a more tasteless compound of 
 heaviness, insipidity, and bronze ! Can it be charac- 
 teristic? 
 
 Opifer. 
 
 This being an exact representation of the lamp hang- 
 ing in the Great Room of the Ac — d — my, and design- 
 ed by Mr. W — st, it was thought unnecessary to exhibit 
 it. N. B. It is intended to trace the features of the 
 members upon the globes immediately on the close of 
 the present Ex — b — t — n. 
 
 Hangman, 
 
 175. Statue of Napoleon. Sketch of the one intended 
 for the Pedestal in the centre of the Champ du Mai. 
 
 To reign is worth ambition, though in Hell.'^ 
 
 Milton. 
 
86 THE REJECTED PICTURES, 
 
 176. Bust of the present hr~d M-^y — r of L~nd—n. 
 
 " Nomine Major eas, nec sis minor omine sedis^ 
 Competat ut titulo civica Vita novo/' 
 
 Barn. Harrington.^ 
 
 177. Portrait of a mil known visitor at D—mh—e 
 
 " — Oh ! your parasite 
 
 Is a most precious thing 
 
 Your fine, elegant, rascal, that can rise 
 And stoop (almost together) like an arrow ; 
 Shoot thro' the air as nimbly as a star ; 
 Turn short as doth a swallow ; and be here 
 And there, and here and yonder all at once ; 
 Present to any humour, all occasion. 
 And change a visor swifter than a thought ! 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 178. The Descent of Ulysses into Hell. 
 
 The picture, of which this is a copy, was executed for 
 M. Talleyrand, at an early period of the French Revo- 
 lution. Of all the heroes of antiquity, the father of 
 Telemachus has been the chief object of this statesman's 
 regard and imitation. Some politicians imagine, that 
 he has copied not only the real but the mythological 
 parts of the life and character of Ulysses, and that he 
 has paid a visit to the infernal regions, in the only way 
 
Ta^ REJECTED PICTURES. 87 
 
 possible for a modern — that is to say, by acquiring no 
 inconsiderable number of those energies and habits 
 which characterise the rulers of Pandemonium. 
 
 Opifer. 
 
 •~— ^^He seem'd 
 For dignity composed, and high exploit ! 
 But all was false and hollow; though his tongue 
 Dropt manna, and could make the worse appear 
 The better reason, to perplex and dash 
 Maturest counsels ; for hi^ thoughts were low ; 
 To vice industrious, but to nobler deeds 
 Timorous, and slothful ; yet he pleas'd the ear ! 
 
 Milton. 
 
 The principal figure was finely conceived, but the 
 prospect of Hell so unhinged the nerves of some of the 
 courtly visitors on the private view, that the picture 
 was removed. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 1 79. Portrait of L — d S — dm — th. 
 
 « Why doe men grudge at those who raysed be, 
 By royall favour, from a low degree ; 
 Know this. Hee should be honour'dy whom the king 
 To place of dignity shall please to bring 
 
 Geo. Withers. 
 
 Nullum ego sum numen, quid me immortalibus 
 aequas 
 
88 TH E REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 180. Portrait qfS. P^rk-^s, Esq. 
 
 He despises barren and unproductive speculation ; 
 he considers science as desirable only so far as it is 
 beneficial ; and proves himself, upon every occasion, 
 no\ only the teacher, but the friend of mankind." 
 
 CULLEN. 
 
 As he made chemistry much the better for his deal- 
 ing in it, so he never made himself either the worse or 
 the poorer for it." 
 
 Burnet. 
 
 181. Bust of the late John H—r—e T—ke, Esq. 
 
 I knew him one of the most dangerous heads living 
 within the state, and so I held him." 
 
 JONSON. 
 
 182. Head of Dr. Th—nt—n. 
 
 A little learning, twenty grains of sense, 
 Join'd with a double share of ignorance." 
 
 Stephen Duck. 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 89 
 
 183. The Annual Assembly of the M-^ss^^-^ri/ 
 Society for the propagation of the Gospel among the 
 Heathens, in the Rev. R—wl^nd H^Vs Chapel. Sketch 
 taken on the spot, 
 
 " Parthians,and Medes, and ElamiteS; and the dwel- 
 lers in Mesopotamia, and in Judea, and Cappadocia, in 
 Pontus, and Asia. 
 
 Phrygia, and Pamphylia, in Egypt, and in the parts 
 of Libya, about Cyrene, and strangers of Rome, Jews, 
 and proselytes, 
 
 Cretes and Arabians." 
 
 St. Paul. 
 
 Tag, rag, and bobtail." 
 
 Anon. 
 
 Happy, thrice happy, now the savage race, 
 
 she gives them grace; 
 
 Pastors she sends to help them in their need. 
 Some who can't write, with others who can't read ; 
 And on sure grounds the gospel pile to rear. 
 Sends missionary felons every year/' 
 
 Churchill. 
 
 184. Miniature of a fashionable Clergyman. 
 
 a fine quick fellow, and an excellent barber 
 
 \)f prayers." 
 
 JONSON. 
 
90 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 185. Portrait of an existing English Juthor. 
 
 " He lisp'd wit worthy of the presse, as if that he 
 Had us'd his cradle as a Ubrarie.'^ 
 
 Ric. West. 
 
 Laudatur et alget."^* 
 
 186. A Lusus Natur^Bj in the Cabinet of theK^y^l 
 S—^c-^ty. Fainted for Mr. P*^e Kn^. 
 
 A thing more strange than on Nile's slime, the sunne 
 E'er bred, or all which into Noah's ark came : 
 A thing which would have pos'd Adam to name : 
 Stranger than seven antiquaries studies. 
 Than Africk's monsters, Guianaes rarities, 
 Stranger than strangers." Donne; 
 
 There was something so equivocal in this picture, 
 that even the unfettered minds of the Ac— d — m— ns 
 were startled. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 187. Portrait of Sir Eg^rt^n IMgh. 
 
 O, this knight 
 
 (Were he well known) would be a precious thing 
 To fit our English stage : he that should write 
 But such a fellow, should be thought to feigu 
 Extremely, if not maliciously." 
 
 JONSON. 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 91 
 
 2 88. Portrait of the late R. C-^mb-^rl^nd, Esq. 
 
 " His easy presence check'd no decent joy. 
 Him ev'n the dissolute admir'd ; for he 
 A graceful looseness, when he pleas'd, put on, 
 And laughing could instruct. Much had he read, 
 Much more had seen ; he studied from the life. 
 And in th'original perus'd mankind.''' 
 
 Armstrong. 
 
 I89. The Fall of Icarus. 
 
 This picture was painted about seven years since, 
 
 under the direction of the late Mr. H e T — k — e. 
 
 Its object was to furnish an impressive lesson to his 
 political pupil ; and the venerable instructor took care 
 to repeat, in many a Diversion of Purley,^ that as 
 the unfortunate boy broke his neck by soaring too near 
 the monarch of the sky, an enthusiastic demagogue 
 might lose his head by approaching too close to the 
 kings of the earth. Happily, there is no fear of the 
 modern Icarus taking too adventurous a flight, although 
 his Daedalus be no more. Westminster's pride, and 
 England's glory," must be content to remain a puppet 
 of Palace-yard for the rest of his career. 
 
 *^ Qui jacet in terra, non habetunde cadat." 
 
 OpiFER.^^ 
 
 This subject has been treated by an R. A., (vide Ex- 
 hibition,) of course no competition could be permitted. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
92 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 190. The exaltation of the L — d Ch—f J—st—e, of 
 the C^rt of C—m—n Pl—s. 
 
 (The M— n — st— r speaks.) 
 
 — I was born to make thee, my good weasel, 
 Set thee on a bench and ha' the twirl a chain. 
 With the best Lord's Vermine of 'em all," 
 
 " A very worthy gentleman in his exteriors, madam. 
 Ay, he shews he is judicial in his clothes." 
 
 JoNSON. 
 
 191. Model for a Bust of JP. L. Ch—nt~y, Esq., an 
 English SctdptoVy of no Academy* 
 
 With native beauties win applause 
 Beyond cold critic's studied laws, 
 
 O ! bid Britannia rival Greece !" 
 
 Warton. 
 
 The reason stated in page 73 applied in full force to 
 the rejection of this article. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 192. Portrait (Miniature) of Mr. W^ll—sl-^-y 
 P — ie, of Wamtead. 
 
 « Why did you marry, Captain ? 
 
 I married with six thousand pounds ; I was in love 
 
 with that." 
 
 JoNSON. 
 
THE REJECTED PICTURES. 93 
 
 193. The H^e of L — ds in grand costume in 1815. 
 
 The little things, elate with pride 
 Strut to and fro, from side to side 
 In tiny pomp, and, pertly vain, 
 Lords of their pleasing orb, they reign." 
 
 Step. Duck, 
 
 194. Finished Sketch of the Champ du Mai,'' Paris. 
 
 ^' Ruffian-pride 
 
 Usurps the throne of Justice, turns the pomp 
 
 Of public powV, the majesty of rule. 
 
 The sword, the laurel, and the purple robe. 
 
 To slavish empty pageants, to adorn 
 
 A tyrant's walk, and glitter in the eyes 
 
 Of such as bow the knee." 
 
 Akenside. 
 
 195. Portrait of the Hon. Author of RoncevallesJ' 
 
 1 was not borne to Helicon, nor dare 
 Presume to think myselfe a muse's heire, 
 I have no title to Parnassus' hill. 
 Nor any acre of it by the will 
 Of a dead ancestour, nor could I be 
 Ought but a tenant unto poetrie." 
 
 Randolph. 
 
 Your verses, good Sir, are no poems, they'll not 
 hinder your rising i' the state/' 
 
 JONSON, 
 
94 THE REJECTED PICTURES. 
 
 igd. Bust of the Hon. H^y Gr-^y B—nn—U, M. P\ 
 
 — " Who 'bove controulment, dares to speak his mind 
 
 Dares, unabashed, in evVy place appear. 
 
 And nothing fears, but what he ought to fear/' 
 
 Churchill. 
 
 Omitted, from a respectful and necessary attention 
 to the feelings of the Court. 
 
 Hangman. 
 
 P. S. The Hangman has observed, with much sur- 
 prise, that one word of the quotation affixed to the last 
 catalogue of the R — 1 A — d — ^y, may be applied to the 
 arts, or their professors. This he laments, as a depar- 
 ture from the usual practice of that distinguished body. 
 He therelbre requests the purchasers of that catalogue 
 to expunge the whole passage from Cicero, and insert 
 the following from a learned modern ; which he trusts 
 will be found an additional instance of that felicity of 
 adaptation, which has distinguished the title-pages of 
 our preceding exhibitions : — 
 
 ANTIPERICATAMETANAPARBEUGEDAMPHICRIBRATIONES 
 MENDlCANTIUMr 
 
 Rabelais. 
 
APPENDIX. 
 
 TRANSLATIONS. 
 
 0.) 
 
 1, Elegans no?i.'] *^ Elegant without magnificence, 
 splendid, without sumptuousness, he aspires, 
 on all occasions, to refined taste, unmixed 
 with extravagance.'^ 
 
 (2.) 
 
 S. Itoc^ fvvn(ro[Ai^cc.'] ^' And shall we two alone be able 
 to heap Pelion on Ossa V' 
 
 (3.) 
 
 7. Tu hosce insirue.'l Do you draw up the troops in 
 order of battle ; TJl take up my station in the 
 rear, and thence give the signal to all/' 
 
96 
 
 APPENDIX. 
 
 (4.) 
 
 9. Ubi Utus.'] Quickly thither 
 
 Jovial boys do flock together ; 
 In which place all sorrow lost is, 
 Guests know how to kiss their hostess ; 
 Nought but love doth border near it. 
 Goose and Hen will witness bear it." 
 
 (5.) 
 
 12. Cum uxore.'] With his wife in a chariot, muffled 
 
 up in his cloak.'' 
 
 (6.) 
 
 13. Jefais,\ I make a thousand oaths never to write 
 
 again : immediately, in spite of myself, my 
 imagination rekindles — I seize, on the spot, 
 pen, ink, and paper, and losing the recollec- 
 tion of my vain resolutions, I write line after 
 line as they happen to suggest themselves." 
 
 (70 
 
 15. Suavis odor, 2 Smell of gain my sense benumbeth, 
 Little care I whence it cometh ; 
 Be't from camp, choir, cottage, carpet, 
 Field, fold, cellar, forest, market." 
 
 17. Eccksia in,'] 
 
 (8.) 
 
 The Church is in danger." 
 
APPENDIX. 
 
 97 
 
 (9.) 
 
 18. Arma virumque.'] Arms and the man I sing !" ' 
 
 (10.) 
 
 19. Homme de lettre.l A man of letters, a man of 
 
 erudition, a man of sufficiency, a man of ca- 
 pacity — a man super-excellent in all the sci^ 
 ences, natural, moral, and political. A learned 
 man — extremely learned, per omnes modos et 
 casus. — A man who understands, superlatively ^ 
 fable, mythology, and historj'^ ; grammar, 
 poesy, rhetoric, logic, and sophistry ; mathe- 
 matics, arithmetic, optics, and the interpreta- 
 tion of dreams ; cosmometry, geometry, archi* 
 tecture, speculative and speculatory ; medi- 
 cine, astronomy, astrology, physiognomy, me- 
 toposcopy, chiromancy, geomancy, &c. &c. 
 
 (n.) 
 
 20. Vrit enim.'] Oppressive dazzles with excess of 
 
 light;^ 
 
 (12.) 
 
 £1. Nolo episcopari.'] ^'I am unwilling to be created 
 a bishop/' 
 
 H 
 
98 
 
 APPENDIX. 
 
 (13.) 
 
 23. O, Faustule. Little Faustus, tell thy true heart 
 
 In what region, coast, or new part, 
 Field or fold thou hast been bousing, 
 Without linen, bedding, housing ; 
 In what tavern, pray thee shew us, 
 Here on earth, or else below us.'' 
 
 (14.) 
 
 24. Afoiivlr\^ioy.'\ Forica, a public jakes, or house 
 
 of office." 
 
 (15.) 
 
 24. l^on cuivis\ It is not the lot of every man to go 
 to Corinth." 
 
 (16.) 
 
 30. Errando disco,] I learn by blundering." 
 
 (17.) 
 
 30. Je tien$ que.'] P. I consider that this impediment to 
 the action of her tongue is produced by certain 
 humours, which we learned men call peccant 
 humours; peccant — that is to say, peccant 
 humours; like as the vapours formed by the 
 exhalations of the influences, which, mounting 
 into the regions of diseases, coming, as we 
 
 say to Do you understand Latin 
 
 Q. « Not at all." 
 
APPENDIX. 
 
 99 
 
 P. You do not understand Latin 
 Q. " No.'' 
 
 P. (with enthusiasm,) Cabricias arci thuram, 
 
 catalamuSy <5rc., ^c." 
 Q. Ah ! why have I not studied 
 
 (18.) 
 
 32. Ubi mures.'\ All about me ; 
 
 Mice within, and thieves without me/^ 
 
 (19.) 
 
 36. Diruit, cedificat'] Now high the building raise, 
 
 Now pull it down ; nor round, nor square can 
 please." 
 
 (20.) 
 
 37. Sapientum^ "The eighth wise man." 
 
 (21.) 
 
 40. Aut tnsanit.'] He's mad, or making verses.'^ 
 
 41. Rem populi.'\ "Do t/ou manage the business of 
 
 the people 
 
 (23.) 
 
 44. Gotham! ubi.} " Gotham ! where sure am J) 
 Though not all fools, I saw many !" 
 
 H 2 
 
100 
 
 APPENDIX. 
 
 (24.) 
 
 45. D'un maitre.'] " Political corruptors of a feeble 
 master, and voluptuous tyrants who reign 
 under his name ; they drown his lethargic 
 languor in pleasures." 
 
 (25.) 
 
 49. ^ Sans doute!\ Certainly he intends a libel." 
 
 (26.) 
 
 oO. Ordo bulbosusj] '^That kind, or order, which has 
 a round head like an onion." 
 
 (27.) 
 
 50. Velut (Zgri somnia,'] " Like a sick man's dreams. 
 
 Varies all shapes, and mixes all extremes/' 
 
 (28.) 
 
 54/ Davus sumJi I am Davus, and not CEdipus." 
 
 (29.) 
 
 57. Deprendi,"] It is horrible to be detected !" 
 
 (30.) 
 
 59. Sunt fornacesJ] " No fire did the chimney enter ; 
 Butt'ries without butlers guarded. 
 Stately gates were double-warded ; 
 Hoary chimneys without smoke too, 
 Hungry kitchens without cook too. 
 
APPENDIX. 
 
 101 
 
 IJallooing loud, O empty wonder ! 
 Echo strait resounded ^ Hunger/ 
 Who inhabits this vast brick house 
 Echo made reply, The titmouse.' 
 Ominous cell ; no drudge at home, Sir ? 
 Echo answer made, ^ Begone, Sir !' " 
 
 (31.) 
 
 61. Ineptus!] ''Is this man a little impertinent and 
 boasting/' 
 
 '' It is not sufficient to tag a verse." 
 
 (32.) 
 
 64. Now ad vinum.'] " Not to bouse wine, but to sell 
 lowr 
 
 (33.) 
 
 68. Vroculy O procuL~] '' Hence, far hence, ye profane." 
 
 (34.) 
 
 68. Solitudinem.'] '' They make a solitude, and call it 
 
 peace." 
 
 Byron. 
 
 (35.) 
 
 69. Possessio pacifica.'] " A peaceable possession for 
 
 sixty years makes a right." 
 
 (36.) 
 
 69, Lex non favet.'] '' The law does not favour the 
 desires of the sumptuous." 
 
102 APPENDIX. 
 
 (37.) 
 
 72. On park pen.'] He speaks little when his vanity 
 does not prompt him.*^ 
 
 (38.) 
 
 74. Libera per.'] " I was the original who set my free 
 footsteps upon the vacant sod ; [ trod not in 
 the steps of others." 
 
 (30.) 
 
 7/5. Ut l<zti phalerisJ] That all should be glad with 
 trappings, and all with collars." 
 
 (40.) 
 
 78. Respondes, altera.'] You answer with one eye- 
 brow elevated to the forehead, another de** 
 pressed to the chin/^ 
 
 (41.) 
 
 80e Maximus in.] Very great in very little things." 
 
 (42. 
 
 82. Comme cest.] " As it is the character of lofty 
 intellects to make many matters understood by 
 a few words, so, on the contrary, little minds 
 have the gift of speaking much and saying 
 nothing." 
 
APPENDIX. 
 
 103 
 
 (43.) 
 
 S'arrivi col super.'] " If in thy skilful heart this 
 lore be writ 
 To tell th' event of things to end unbrought, 
 Then say v/hat issue, and what end, the stars 
 Allot to Asia's troubles, toils, and wars." 
 
 (44.) 
 
 85. Cum puellaJ] With a girl. 
 
 Rose by name, a dainty pearl : 
 — — — I oft'n moved 
 Her to love me, whom I loved." 
 
 (45.) 
 
 86. Que les vers.] Let not verse be always your 
 
 employment; cultivate friendship, and be sin- 
 cere. It is not enough that you are pleasing 
 and delightful in print ; you should know 
 how to introduce these qualities into conver- 
 sation and the world." 
 
 (46.) 
 
 89. LaudeSy Gaure^ " You Gaurus, praise nothing, 
 but blame all things ; take care lest you please 
 no one, whilst no one pleases you." 
 
 (47.) 
 
 91. Ingenui vuUus.] A youth of comeli/ aspect, and 
 ingenuous modesty.'' 
 
164 
 
 APPENDIX. 
 
 (48.) 
 
 91. Tufai come.'] An ape, the higher he mounts, the 
 
 more he shews his tail/^ 
 
 (49.) 1 
 
 92. II se croit] ^*He believes himself a great man, 
 
 and made a preface r 
 
 (50.) 
 
 94. Ne sutor ultra,'} Let not the cobkr go beyond 
 his last." 
 
 (51.) 
 
 95. Ubi convenissentJ] There the bears were come to 
 town ; 
 
 Two rude hunks— 'tis truth I tell ye, 
 Drawing near them, they did smell me ; 
 And, like two mis-shapen wretches. 
 Made me, ay me, wrong my bretches.'^ 
 
 (52.) 
 
 98. Quatnor aut.] Drawn are the scenes, and lo ! for 
 many an hour, 
 Wide o'er the stage the flying squadrons pour; 
 Then kings in chains confess the fate of war, 
 And weeping queens attend the victor's car; 
 Chairs, coaches, carts, in rattling rout are roll'd. 
 And ships of might}^ bulk their sails unfold ; 
 At last, the model of some captive towns. 
 In ivory built, the splendid triumph crowns. 
 
APPENDIX. 
 
 105 
 
 " Sure, if Democritus were yet on earth, 
 Whether a beast of mix'd and monstrous birth. 
 Bid them with gaping admiration gaze, — 
 Or a white elephant their wonder raise. 
 The crowd would more delight the laughing 
 sage 
 
 Than all the farce and follies of the stage/' 
 
 (53 ) 
 
 99. Nous poutons,'] We can appear great in a si- 
 
 tuation below our merit ; but we often look 
 little in employments above our abilities/' 
 
 (54.) 
 
 100. Quam RosaJ] " Fresh was my Rose, till by a 
 
 North wind tost. 
 She sap, scent, verdure, and her vigour lost." 
 
 (55.) 
 
 105. Ne vulgo narresJ] Nor loud proclaim with how 
 much toil you bear 
 Such verse, as may detain e'en Caesar's ear." 
 
 5(5. 
 
 107. Un vain caprice.'] " I believe that capricious 
 vanity, or a ridiculous inclination, has made 
 me a rhymer, for my sins." 
 
300 
 
 APPENDIX. 
 
 (57.) 
 
 110. Magis magni.] *'The greatest clerks are not the 
 
 wisest men.'^ 
 
 (58.) 
 
 111. Mquum estJ] A woven wind shall wedded matrons 
 
 wear, 
 
 And naked in a linen cloud appear !" 
 
 (59.) 
 
 111. Magister artis,'] The belly is a master of art, 
 and a liberal bestower of genius/' 
 
 (60.) 
 
 1 14. UrceoUy pelves.'] " Water-pots, basons, frying- 
 pans, and platters." 
 
 (61.) 
 
 118. Travaillez pour.} Labour for renown; and 
 never permit a sordid gain to be the only ob- 
 ject of a distinguished writer. I am aware that 
 a man of parts may derive, without shame or 
 crime, a legitimate emolument from his works ; 
 but I am indignant with those eminent au- 
 thors, who, lost to the desire of fame, and 
 greedy of gold, let out their muse to the hire 
 of a bookseller, and make a mercenary trade 
 of a divine art !" 
 
APPENDIX. 
 
 107 
 
 (62.) 
 
 1 19. Parmus mihi.'] " Cloth is my bread." 
 
 (63.) 
 
 122. Consentiebant.'] " Caesar Octavianus, Antonias> 
 and Lepidus, united together." 
 
 (64.) 
 
 124, Ecce iterumJ] Here's Crispin again!" 
 
 (65.) 
 
 126. Ce monstre.'] This impetuous, sanguinary, and 
 
 inflexible monster is the dreadful enemy even 
 of his own vassals; — his study is the calamity 
 of mankind ; — the blood of his own party fre- 
 quently stains his hands he tyrannizes over 
 the hearts that he lacerates; — and punishes 
 crimes of which he is himself the inciter." 
 
 (66.) 
 
 127. Thesaurus.'] " Looking for treasure, they found 
 
 charcoal only." 
 
 (670 
 
 1S2. On croiroii.'] To see you, in your wild freaks, 
 safe from the attack of satire, reason likeCato 
 upon virtue and vice, decide upon the merits 
 and value of authors, and attempt, with impu- 
 nity to teach the learned ; one would believe, 
 that you have great ability in speaking and 
 
lOS 
 
 APPENDIX. 
 
 writing; but I, who am in the secret, who 
 count your daily errors, I laugh to see that 
 one so feeble and impotent should assume the 
 task of reforming the town/^ 
 
 (63.) 
 
 133. Ille ego sum^^ What I was once, same am I now, 
 Hair, conditions, garments, too ; 
 Yea, there's no man justly doubteth. 
 These the same shoes I went out with : 
 And for comb, I ne'er us'd any, 
 Lest I lost some of my money." 
 
 (69.) 
 
 137. dheunt pallorque.l The meagre paleness from- 
 his aspect fled. 
 And in its room sprang up a florid red ; 
 Through all his limbs a youthful vigour flies, 
 His empty'd artVies swell with fresh supplies ; 
 Gazing spectators scarce believe their eyes. 
 But ^son is the most surprised to find 
 A happy change in body and in mind ; 
 In sense and constitution the same man. 
 As when his fortieth active year began." 
 
 (70.) 
 
 140. Hades,'] "He has censures which praise, and 
 commendations which revile." 
 
APPENDIX. 
 
 109 
 
 (71.) 
 
 142. Si Von vient!] If we enquire by what secret mystery 
 Alidor has built a monastery at his own ex- 
 pense, we shall find, that being an honourable 
 man, and of profound piety, he is desirous to 
 render to God what he has taken from man- 
 kind. 
 
 (72.) 
 
 145, Un auteur.'] An author on his knees, in a crying 
 
 preface." 
 
 (73.) 
 
 146. Per qucd spiritus.'] By which breath and life 
 
 return to illustrious commanders after their 
 decease." 
 
 (74.) 
 
 148. Docteur en styleJ] " Learned in bombast, he passes 
 
 for sublime, because he is obscure." 
 
 (75.) 
 
 149. Omnium.] In the opinion of all, capable of 
 
 government, had he not governed." 
 
 (76.) 
 
 152. Piacide^plene.] Freely, fully, plainly, 
 
 I've broke Priscian's forehead mainly." 
 
tlO APPENDIX- 
 
 (77.) 
 
 152. Hcedera lata!] Good wine no bush doth 
 need, as I suppose, 
 Let Bacchus' bush be Barnaby's rich nose. 
 No bush, no garland needs of Cypress green, 
 Barnaby's nose may for a bush be seen." 
 
 (78.) 
 
 152. Le satireJ\ "Satire only serves to make a fat^ 
 man ridiculous/' 
 
 (79.) 
 
 154. Diem totum.] He snored out all the day." 
 
 (80.) 
 
 156. Disputandi.'] " The itch of disputation is the scab 
 of the church." 
 
 (81.) 
 
 157. Presque tous.l " Almost all those persons who 
 imitate others with so much wit, have ex- 
 tremely little of it in themselves, and when 
 they cease to be the person they have selected, 
 and with whom you were so much pleased, 
 they become insipid and tiresome; because 
 they are only themselves. 
 
 ♦ Faf^ is not translated. 
 
APPENDIX. 
 
 Ill 
 
 (82.) 
 
 158. Amhubaiarumi] The tribes of minstrels, quacks, 
 strollers, mimics, and blackguards/' 
 
 (83.) 
 
 164. Implentur.] " Glutted wish old port and fat 
 venison.'' 
 
 (84.) 
 
 168. Ibericis.'] His sides are still sore with the Spanish 
 scourges." 
 
 (850 
 
 no.. Tempora.'] " The times are altered." 
 
 (36.) 
 
 176. Nomine major. Now thou hast chang'd thy 
 title unto may'r, 
 Let life, state, style, improve thy charter 
 there." 
 
 (87.) 
 
 179. Nullum ego.] " I am but a mere man, why do you 
 raise me to the honours of the immortals/^ 
 
 (88.) 
 
 185. Laudatur.] He is praised and starves. 
 
112 
 
 APPENDIX. 
 
 (89.) 
 
 189. QuijacetJ] He who is at the bottom, can fall 
 no lower/' 
 
 TITLE. 
 
 Hisjocamur.'\ With these things we jest, sport, are 
 delighted, are grieved, complain, are angry • 
 sometimes we describe them concisely, some- 
 times in a loftier strain 
 
INDEX 
 
 OF 
 
 NAMES AND SUBJECTS. 
 
 Art. 
 
 And — RD — N, J. P. Esq. 1 
 Al — X — D — R,Mr.D — N — L 15 
 Art of evading a Charitable Sub- 
 scription, Author of 49 
 Alice Fell - -62 
 
 Aps— Y H- E - 106 
 
 Anti-ministerial Triumvirate 138 
 
 B— ST, Mr. S— RG— T - 4 
 B — YM—E, L — d - 5 
 B— N, L— d - - 13 
 B— TH— T, E—l - 52 
 
 Bibliomaniac, Head of 58 
 B— L— w, Sir G. - 66 
 
 Bennet, Timothy - 69 
 Barrister, eminent - 78 
 B— RG — s. Mausoleum to the 
 
 Memory of S — r F. - 84 
 Br— T— N, Mr. - 88 
 
 B— TH— T, Rt. Hon. C. 99 
 B— RD— T, Sir F. - 101 
 
 Banker, celebrated aged 108 
 Buonaparte, Napoleon 126 
 B— Y, SirW. - - 139 
 
 B — ^H, Knights of New Order 
 
 receiving the last honour 163 
 B— r,B— pof - - 167 
 B— NN — TT, Hon H — Y G — y 
 196 
 
 Cl — KE, Dr. Ad— M - 11 
 Cl— KE, H— s^N, Esq. 16 
 
 Art* 
 
 C— N H— e, 1835 - 22 
 C— D— N, M— s of - 25 
 C — TH — M, E — 1 of - 25 
 C— M— s, H— e of - 29 
 C — ngr — ss at Vienna - 31 
 C— s— L— GH, L — y * 39 
 C — N H — E, Canaille of 45 
 C— KR— LL, S. p. - 50 
 C— KR — LL, Mr. jun, - 51 
 C— H— E, L— d - 57 
 
 C— GR—E, Sir W. - 60 
 C— K— R, Mr. - - 61 
 
 C— -p — L, Hon. and Rev. 63 
 Commercial Hall Wii:>e Com- 
 pany - - - 64 
 C— -N— G, Rt. Hon. G. - 72 
 C — N H — E, Bacchanalian Or- 
 gie in Gardens of - 79 
 C — STL — n, L — d - 82 
 C—TEs, Mr. - - 91 
 Covent Garden Theatre 98 
 Crowned Heads, Models of 109 
 C — SS— L, Abp. of - 110 
 Conference of Octavius, An- 
 tony, and Lepidus - 122 
 Congress, Embassadors at 131 
 Cr--^t— I R— w, Editor of 132 
 Ch — R, L — d H-— H apd his 
 Wife - - 133 
 C— B— t,W. Esq. - 140 
 Cr«— BB — Rev. G. - 245 
 
INDEX. 
 
 Art. 
 
 C— RT— s, S— r W. - 152 
 Civic After-dinner - 164 
 C — H — E, three distinguished 
 Intimates nt - - 166 
 
 Clergymen, Fashionable 184 
 C — MB — RL — ND, late R. 188 
 Ch— NT— Y, F. L. Esq. 191 
 Champ du Mai - - 194 
 
 D— Y, S— r II— PH~y - 12 
 D— V— s H— T, Esq. M. P. 54 
 D— Y, Col. - - 83 
 
 D— L— Y, Lord- - 113 
 
 D— DL— Y,S— rH. B. - 117 
 D— X— N,Esq. - - 119 
 
 D- D, R— PH, Esq. - 120 
 Discovery of Bruce, from the 
 Lord of the Isles - 124 
 D — nsh — e H — e, V^isitor at 177 
 Descent of Ulysses - 178 
 
 Elba, Sketches of - 53 
 English Tourist - - 95 
 
 E— K~E, L— d - - 130 
 
 Epsom Races, Scene at, after the 
 manner of Mr. Wilkie 158 
 English Author - - 185 
 
 F — zcL — R — E, Capt. - 8 
 
 F— V— LL, Mr, - - 10 
 French Corps Diplomatique of 
 
 1809 - - ' - 87 
 
 F— D, Sir F— D— K - 104 
 
 F— TZG— LD, Mr. - 107 
 
 F— FE, E— 1 of - - 162 
 
 FusELi, Allegorical Piece in 
 
 style of Mr. - - 171 
 
 Giaour, Flight of - 20 
 Gl — NB — E, L— d - 55 
 G— DSM— D, Miss - 129 
 G— s,S— rV— Y - 150 
 
 Gr — V — LLE, Hon. C. - 160 
 Gr— V— LLE, Hon. F. - 161 
 Gertrude, from Mr. Campbell, 
 169 
 
 G— R— w, S— r W— M - 170 
 H— T— Residence of M h ss 9 
 
 Art. 
 
 H — NT — NGT — N, Rev. W. 27 
 H— B— R, Rev. Mr. - 76 
 H— T, L— IT, Esq. - 77 
 H— D, M— q— s of - 81 
 H — LL — D H — e, Converzatione 
 
 at - - - 93 
 
 H — LL — w — LL, Adm. - 96 
 Heaphy, Piece of Still Life, in 
 
 manner of Mr. - 114 
 
 Herculaneum, Excavations at, 
 127 
 
 Hackney, Alms Houses at 142 
 
 Insolvent Debtors* Bill, New 4 
 J— FF— s, Mr. - - 38 
 
 Jacqueline, Return of 46 
 Judas betrayins^ Christ 153 
 Ill—s P— ge in 1810 - 172 
 Icarus, Fall of - - 189 
 
 Kiss, The, from the Poems of 
 T. Moore, Esq. - 28 
 
 K— N, Mr. - - 74 
 
 Keeper of the R— 1 A — d — y, 
 Painting-Room of the 123 
 
 Kn — l — s, Esq - - 159 
 
 Louis XVIIL - - 2 
 
 L — E, Master - - 5 
 
 L— YofL— N - - 18 
 
 Lord Mayor, State Coach of 43 
 
 La — RE — T, 105 
 
 L— WR-E,S— rT. - 134 
 
 L — N — d — cH, L — d - J 43 
 
 L— d M— y— r - - 176 
 
 Lusus Naturae - - 186 
 
 L— GH, S— rE. . - 187 
 
 L— d C—h J— e of C— t of 
 
 C— m P— s - - 190 
 
 L— ds,H— eof- - 193 
 
 Maze Pond Baptist Meeting- 
 
 House - - 15 
 
 M— sii. Rev. Dr. - 17 
 
 M— R— -Y,S— rJ. - 18 
 
 M— LB— H, D— e of - 25 
 
 M — NL — T, a Poem - 40 
 
 M— E, T— s, Esq, - 71 
 
 M— g P—t, Editor of - 73 
 
INDEX. 
 
 Art. 
 
 M — LD — Y, Sir H. and a Lady 
 
 85 
 
 M—TG— M— Y, Mr. - 86 
 Milford, Plan for Improvement 
 of Lazaretto Establishments 
 at - - - 121 
 
 M— -g C— cle, Editor of 125 
 M— E, L-^d - - 135 
 
 Medea renewing the Age of 
 ^soN - - 137 
 
 M— SF— D, D— r C— s of 161 
 M — ss — n — ry Society - 183 
 
 N— H,Mr. - - 35 
 N— w— T, S— r J— N - 80 
 N— eh— m H— e - 144 
 Nelson's Monument - 146 
 N— K, D— e of - - 154 
 
 N — R — s, Rev. - - 156 
 
 Nobleman, My Lord 
 
 173 
 
 Napoleon, Statue for Champ 
 du Mai - - 175 
 
 Order of the Bath, decorations 
 of the New - - 75 
 
 Plymouth Breakwater 3 
 — L, R — CH — RD, M. D. 
 
 30 
 
 Ph— L— PS, Mr. - 30 
 
 P— E R— t's Cottage 35 
 Pl— F—R, Mr. W. - 37 
 Physicians, College of 44 
 P — E R — T inspecting Patterns 
 of Dress - - 56 
 
 P— RR, Rev. Dr. - 92 
 
 p— sofW— s - - 116 
 
 P— Y, G. M.P. - 138 
 
 P— E R— T, in 1812 - 149 
 P — rl — t, majorities of 151 
 P_RK— s, S. Esq. - 180 
 P— -LE, Mr. W— LL— SL— Y 
 
 192 
 
 Q— T—N, Col. - 7 
 
 Q— n's P— 1— ce, - 59 
 
 R — NN— E, Mr. - S 
 
 R— s, Dr. Ab— H— M 19 
 
 Art. 
 
 R— B— s—N Mr. M.P. 34 
 Recluse, English - 70 
 
 R— B— s— N, Rt, Hon. F. .T. 
 
 99 
 
 R— s— B— Y, L—d - 100 
 R— B—s — N, S. Esq, 142 
 Russia, Napoleon meditating In- 
 vasion of - - 147 
 Roderick - - 165 
 R — L A — Y, Genius of 174 
 Roncevalles, Hon. Author of 
 195 
 
 Sh—r— D— N, R. B. Esq. 23 
 Society of Architects 24 
 S— TH, Vy. Esq. M.P. 26 
 Steeple of St. Ann^s, Soho 50 
 St — v — NS — N, Col. - 90 
 Sii — w, S — r J — s - 97 
 S— L— M— N, Dr. - 102 
 Scipio, Continence of 111 
 S— H— G, Mr. - ib. 
 
 S — NC — K, S — r J. - 112 
 S — FF — NO — N, Hon. W. 115 
 Sc—TT, W— R Esq. - 118 
 S — ^RR — z — N, Gen. - 136 
 S— TH— Y, R. Esq. - 148 
 Sm — THS, Messrs. - 15T 
 SouLT, Marshal - 168 
 
 S — DM — TH, L — d - 179 
 
 T— ws— R, Rev. Mr. - 14 
 Trinity House, three Elder Bre- 
 thren of - * 26 
 T— L— w, L—d - 40 
 T — s Newspaper, Editor of 47 
 Temple of Concord, &c. 60 
 T — LL — Y — D, Princess 65 
 Tourists in France, group of 128 
 T~Y, Rt. Hon. M.P. - 138 
 Tu— D, VV. Esq. - 141 
 T— KE, J. H. - - 181 
 Th — NT — N, Dr. - 18^ 
 
 V E Ch — NC R - 6 
 
 Victualling Office, Deptford 32 
 Utrum Horum - 68, 69 
 
 V— T, Rt. Hon. N—s - 103 
 
INDEX. 
 
 Art. 
 
 Wh— DB— Y, Mr. - 3 
 W — LL — SL — Y, Hon. and Rev. 
 
 21 
 
 W— NE, Sir W— N W. 36 
 W— TH— N, Mr. - 41 
 
 W— LL— ic, Duke of - 42 
 W— D, Aid. - - 48 
 W— Ds— TH, W— M, Esq.^ 67 
 W— nds — r Upper Park, iraagi- 
 gin^ry view in - 68, 69 
 Wh— TB— D, S. Esq. M.P. 
 
 ^9, 133 
 
 Art. 
 
 W — nds — r Home Park, design 
 for improvement of 90 
 
 Westminster Bridge, elevation 
 of - - -94 
 
 W — rw — k H — e at midnight, 
 boudoir of - - 155 
 
 Young Children, group of, after 
 Rembrandt - - • S3 
 
 Printed by J. Gillet, Crown Court, Fleet Street, London,