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LIFE IN^ JESUS: 
 
 A MEMOIR 
 
 MRS. MARY WOSLOW, ' 
 
 ARRANGED FROM HER 
 
 C0rr^spiihna, §mh ^tilr fltougbts. 
 
 BY H5B SON 
 
 OCTAVIUS WNSLOW, D. D., 
 
 AUTHOR OP 
 
 'MTDNIGHT HARMOflES," "PERSONAL DECLENSION AND REVITAL," "THE PRECIOUS 
 
 THINGS OF GOD," ETC. 
 
 " lu her had Nature bounteously combined 
 The tenderest bosom with the strongest mind ; 
 I view the Mother and the Saint in one, 
 And pay beyond the homage of a Son." — KnigM. 
 
 Her children arise up, and call her blessed." — Prao. xxxi. 28. 
 
 NEW YORK: 
 ROBERT CARTER & BROTHERS, 
 
 No. 580 BEOADWAY. 
 1860. 
 
EDWARD O. JENKINS, 
 
 printer & Sterfotgper, 
 No. 26 Frankfort Street. 
 
PREFACE 
 
 There are few literary tasks more delicate in conception, 
 difficult in design, or responsible in execution, than that of 
 composing a parent's life — that parent a mother. Under ordi- 
 nary circumstances, to portray a character distinguished for its 
 preeminent excellence, strongly developed in some of its essen- 
 tial features, and remarkable for a certain idiosyncrasy which 
 assigns to it a place in the portrait gallery peculiarly and 
 impressively its own, would impose upon the delineator the 
 greatest caution ; lest the imagination, enamoured of its study, 
 should be allowed unduly to control the judgment, and thereby 
 an ideal rather than a truthful picture should be the result. 
 But, to sketch a character which, from childhood, we have 
 filially loved and venerated, and, in later life, have looked upon 
 with a deepening admiration, bordering upon a feeling of re- 
 ligious awe ; — a character, too, sanctified in an eminent degree 
 by the grace of God, demands the possession of powers to 
 which the writer can prefer but a feeble claim. A mother ! 
 who has not felt the exquisite tenderness of her love, the magic 
 power of her influence, the sacred reverence of her name ? 
 Has she weaknesses ? — what feeling heart could unveil them ? 
 
 (3) 
 
4 PREFACE. 
 
 Has she virtues ? — what fihal hand can paint them ? And yet 
 the holy office has been undertaken of perpetuating a mother's 
 memory ! It seemed proper that some individual should 
 weave together the incidents of a life too interesting and in- 
 structive to be altogether lost. Who so fitted for the -work, as 
 one who had known her so long, and had known her so well ? 
 The absence of the present Memoir from the biography of the 
 Christian church — imperfectly as its materials are compiled — 
 the writer, with lowliness, hesitates not to say, would have 
 been a real and serious loss. The memorial of a life so unre- 
 servedly consecrated to God, — the publication of a correspon- 
 dence, so rich in Christian experience, and replete with Chris- 
 tion comfort, must, with God's blessing, be greatly and exten- 
 sively useful. To retain and perpetuate, therefore, something 
 of that bright spirit that has passed away, and which itself 
 could not be retained, — to catch the mantle as it fell in its 
 celestial flight, and pass it down, a sacred and precious heir- 
 loom, to the Christian church, were a solemn and imperious 
 duty, from which no conviction of inability or sense of unwor- 
 thiness should be allowed to shrink. 
 
 There were difficulties in the accomplishment of the work, 
 other than those inseparable from its peculiar nature. It was 
 found impossible to give that fulness to the biography, that 
 was desired, without involving allusion to the living. Per- 
 sonal references to some who survive,— increasingly to feel how 
 irreparable is their loss, — have already insinuated themselves 
 into the volume to a greater extent and more prominently than 
 either the judgment or taste of the compiler approved. They 
 were, however, so closely interlaced with her writings as to 
 
PREFACE. 5 
 
 render a separation difficult, if not impossible, without essen- 
 tially impairing their beauty and effect. 
 
 The destruction, by her own hands, of one of her earliest 
 and most important private journals, together with a large 
 mass of letters of a deeply interesting and circumstantial char- 
 acter, deprives the work of that completeness of consecutive 
 and incidental history which the editor would like to have 
 preserved. The habit, too, of not dating many of her letters, 
 and jottings in her diary, would greatly have embarrassed the 
 chronological arrangement of the matter, (and may possibly 
 have done so to some shght extent,) but or the events them- 
 selves, which have formed tolerably correct landmarks, guid- 
 ing our course along the stream of her life. 
 
 Painfully trying to his feelings, and physically exhausting, 
 as the work has been, it is not without some regret that his 
 task is concluded. Not only has he counted it an honour — 
 the least in his father's house — to have been intrusted with an 
 office so responsible and sacred, but the prosecution of his work 
 has conferred a happiness hallowed and indescribable. It has 
 been to him, in many a still hour of night, like a prolongation 
 of personal communion Avith her pure and glorified spirit, thus 
 "preventing the feeling of entire disruption, and forming a 
 kind of intermediate stage between her society in this world 
 and the everlasting union of heaven." 
 
 Acknowledgments are due to those of her correspondents 
 who have kindly furnished for the Memoir letters in their pos- 
 session. It has been, necessarily, but to a limited extent that 
 the compiler has been able to avail himself of these invaluable 
 treasures. He hopes, however, to follow the present volume 
 
6 PREFACE. 
 
 with a second one, composed entirely of selections from his 
 mother's unpublished remains, in which many of these letters 
 will appear. 
 
 The work — already and solemnly dedicated to the Triune 
 God — is now humbly laid at the feet of Christ's one church, 
 with the fervent prayer, that the example which it presents of 
 a LIVING FAITH, and of a Catholic Christianity may in- 
 struct, comfort, and animate many saints in their Christian 
 course ; and thus bring honour and praise to Him whom, liv- 
 ing, it was her supreme delight to serve ; and whom, though 
 dead, through these memorials, she still may glorify. 
 
 " Oh, cherish'd and revered ! fond memory well 
 On thee with sacred, sad delight may dwell ! 
 So pure, 80 blest thy life, that death alone 
 Could make more perfect happiness thine own. 
 He came ; thy cup of joy, serenely bright, 
 Full to the last, still flow'd in cloudless light ; 
 He came — an angel, bearing from on high 
 The all it wanted, — Immortahty I" — Mrs. Hkmans. 
 
 Leamington, England. 
 
CONTENTS 
 
 CHAPTER I. 
 
 PAGB 
 
 Christianity a Spiritual Life— The Believer a Living Soul— The Prevalence of 
 Religious Formalism — Archbishop Leighton — The Moral Incentive of a High 
 Standard — Birth — Ancestry — Early Training — A Mother's Influence — Mrs, 
 Forbes — Providential Preservations — First Prayer — Marriage — The Pilgrim 
 Fathers— Military Life— 11—21 
 
 CHAPTER II. 
 
 The Day-dawn of Grace— First Convictions of Sin—" The Whole Duty of Man "— 
 Residence at Romford— Removal to London — St. James's Chapel, Pentonville 
 —Rev. Thomas Sheppard— Spiritual Distress— Xight of Weeping— Morning of 
 Joy— Full Conversion — Writings of Rev. John Newton — Interesting Stranger 
 —Spiritual Conflicts — Restored Peace — Letter to her Mother — Foreshadow- 
 ings of Trial 22—31 
 
 CHAPTER III. 
 
 The Practical Character of her Religion— Family Worship — ^Letter to her Mother 
 — ^Bermuda, its Salubrity, Inhabitants, Spiritual Condition— Asylum of the 
 Puritans — Andrew Marvel — Whitfield visits Bermuda — His successful Labours 
 — Dr. George Forbes — Her Exertions to secure a Minister for Bermuda — Rev. 
 George Burder — Rev. H. H. Cross — Chapel opened in St. George's — Remark- 
 able Providence — Rev. Duncan Dunbar — Colonial Slavery — Rescue of a Slave 
 Family— Manumits her Slaves — ^Providential Escape — ^Illness of her Husband 
 — Dr. Hamilton— Influence of Christian Physicians— Religious Anniversaries 
 — William Wilberforce, Esq. — Her Young Family .... 32 — 64 
 
 CHAPTER IV. 
 
 God's Adjustment of His People to their Position— Her Illness— Captain Winslow's 
 Retirement from the Army— Loss of Property— Her Removal to America — 
 
 (7) 
 
5 CONTENTS. 
 
 Colonel Bayard— Divie Bethune — Her Opinion of the United States — Death 
 of her Infant — Death of her Husband — Letters to her Son — Inconsolable 
 Grief — Light in Darkness — A Remarkable Dream — An Especial Promise — Her 
 Baptism — Walks of Usefulness — A Pious Idiot— Conflict of Faith— Letter to 
 her Son — Memorial to the King— William Wilberforce — Her Communion with 
 God 55—79 
 
 CHAPTER Y. 
 
 Revisits England- Former Scenes — Return to America — Residence at Mount 
 Pleasant — Letter to her Mother — Removal to New York — The Mothers' Meet- 
 ing—American Revivals — President Edwards — ^The Pilgrim Fathers — Outpour- 
 ing of the Spirit on her Family— Letters to her Children— Remarks on the 
 Baptism of the Holy Ghost — On Faith and Prayer — Resume of her History — 
 Touching Letter to her Son 80—89 
 
 CHAPTER VL 
 
 Her Second Visit to England — Earnest Letter to her Children — Extracts from 
 her Diary — Rev. James Harington Evans— A Remarkable Providence — Heart- 
 searchings— Death of George IV. — Reflection on Christmas — Letter to her 
 Mother — Letter to her Son R. — Letter to her Son H. — Rev. Mr. Evans' Preach- 
 ing-Thoughts in Pentonville Chapel— Interesting Discovery — Letter to her 
 Son — Spiritual Fluctuations— Her Birthdaj^- The Necessity of Trials — Minis- 
 terial Encouragements — Qualifications of a Minister's Wife . . 90 — 125 
 
 CHAPTER VII. 
 
 Her Fitness for Counsel and Comfort — Illness and Death of Mrs. Evans — ^Visit to 
 Cambridge — Haslingfleld — Letter to her Pastor — Rev. Mr. Carus— Diary — 
 Rev. Mr. Melville — Letter to her Son Rev. I. D. W.— Her last Visit to America 
 — Ordination of her Son — Diary— Revival in New York — Return to England — 
 Death of her Mother — Tugby — ^Village Scenes— Her Prayers for the Queen — 
 Anecdote of the Queen— Avoidance of Debt — Rev. R. Cecil— Memoir of Rev. 
 Dr. Payson — Letter to her Son Rev. L D. W.,on Ministerial Work— Heart- 
 searchings — Letter to her Son Rev. G. E. W., on Ministerial Responsibility — 
 Missionary Memoir of Mrs. Harriet Winslow— A Jewel in Mrs. Harriet Wins- 
 low's Crown 126—163 
 
 CHAPTER VIII. 
 
 Her Thoughts on Spiritual Subjects — Communion with God — Dr. Love — Letter to 
 her Son H. J. W.— Letter to her Son R. F. W.— Her Thoughts on Prophetic 
 Truth — Tlie Second Coming of the Lord — Signs of the Times— Puseyism — 
 Gouds Breaking— Parable of the Pearl of Great Price— God's Dealings in His 
 Leadings — Grateful Recollections — Spiritual Joy — The Christian Journey — 
 Godly Sincerity— On Unholy Jealousy— The Unity of the Spirit— Growth in 
 
CONTENTS. y 
 
 PAGE 
 
 Grace— Rev. C. G. Finney— On the Conduct of a Minister's Wife— Parental In- 
 dulgence—Death of her Daughter-in-law— Nearness to God — Feelings at the 
 Lord's Supper— To her Son in Trial— To her Son R. F. W.— Visit to Napton 164—190 
 
 CHAPTER IX. 
 
 The Christian's Chequered Life— Death of her Son H.— Letters on her Bereave- 
 ment — Diary — Letter to her Daughter— Taplow — Reflections on Visiting Wind- 
 sor Castle — Maternal Associations — Address to Mothers — Letter to John-street 
 Maternal Association — Visit to Brighton — Letter to her Son . . 191 — 209 
 
 CHAPTER X. 
 
 Her Passion for Souls — Incident of Rev. Charles Simeon — Faithfulness of an 
 
 American Pastor — Letter to the Duke of Letter to Lord Letter to 
 
 the Archbishop of , on Baptismal Regeneration — Letter to A. G., Esq., of 
 
 New York— Letter to E. T. C, Esq.— Letter to I. W., Esq., Boston, U. S.— 
 Letter to J. T., Esq. — ^Her Love of Union and of Truth — The Evangelical 
 Alliance — Diary — Anti-State-Church Movement — Letter to Miss C. — Letter to 
 the Hon. and Rev. B. W. N. — Letter to a Missionary, on the American Anti- 
 Slavery Society — Letter to her Niece, Mrs. G. — On Public Reading and Prayer 
 — On Ministerial Watchfulness — On Intercourse with God — Her Faith in the 
 Resurrection of Clirist — Looking unto Jesus — Conversion of her Grand- 
 children—Extracts from her Diary 210 — 239 
 
 CHAPTER XI. 
 
 Her Peculiar Talent — ^The Philosophy of Sympathy — Abercrombie on the Moral 
 Feelings — Letters of Consolation : To a beloved Friend — ^To Miss L. 0., on the 
 Death of her Mother — ^To Mrs. F., on the Illness of her Husband — To Mrs. E. 
 B., on the Death of her Infant — To Mrs. C, on her Illness — To the same, on 
 the Death of her Sister— To Mrs. C. , on her Affliction— To Miss L. 0. , on behalf 
 of a Distressed Clergyman — To her Son, on the Death of his Child— To Mrs. 
 G., on the Death of her Husband— To Mr. W., on the Death of his Wife— To 
 Rev. J. H. E., on his Illness— To Mrs. H., on the Death of her Husband- 
 To Miss E. W., in Trial— To Rev. B. P. in Domestic Affliction— " Must I my 
 Brother Keep ? "—Extracts from her Diary— " There is a Voice, it comes to 
 me " 240 — 261 
 
 CHAPTER XII. 
 
 Remarks on Christian Experience — Diary— Letters on Experimental Religion— Let- 
 ter to Lady B., on the Sealing of the Spirit— To a Beloved Friend, on Looking 
 to Christ for Evidences— To Lady L., on Anticipation of Heaven— To Miss M., 
 on Ad /ancement in the Divine Life— To Mrs. T., on Christ's Presence in Sick- 
 ness -To Mrs. A., on the Confession of Sin— To Mrs. W., on Entering Fully into 
 
10 CONTENTS. 
 
 PAGE 
 
 Christ— To Rev. J. H. E. , a Word in Season to a Sick Pastor— To Mrs. Lieuten- 
 ant-Col. P. B., on an open Heart with God — To the Hon. F. T., on making Sure 
 of Salvation — To Lady L.,on the Holy Spirit — ^To Miss S., on the Christian 
 Race— To Lady Mary F. , on Waiting for the Lord— To Mrs. C. , Heaven an In- 
 centive to Religious Perseverance — To Mrs. C. , on the Intercession of Christ 
 
 —To Mrs. C. G., on the Death of her Child— To her Son— To Miss I -, in her 
 
 Illness— To E. S., on Telling Jesus— To W. D. L., in Darkness of Mind— Mrs. 
 AlersHankey 262—319 
 
 CHAPTER XIII. 
 
 Fruit in Old Age— Diary — Rev. Dr. Stone, Brooklyn — Prayer in Suffering — Death 
 of Dr. Chalmers — Burden Cast upon God — ^Her Lameness— Remarkable Re- 
 covery— Napton Vicarage— Death of her Daughter-in-law — Visit to the Grave 
 — Anticipations of Heaven — Bridge on Faith— Her Prayer for the Evangelical 
 AlUance — ^Letter to her Daughter — Death of the Rev. James Harrington Evans 
 — Sympathy with Anxious Inquirers— Letter to Lady A. de Capel B.— Letters 
 to H. and E. S. — Alarming Illness — Dr. Golding Bird — Letters to her Grand- 
 children — Rev. David Fenton Jarman — General Correspondence . 320 — 395 
 
 CHAPTER XIY. 
 
 Last Epoch of the Christian's Life — Growing Heavenliness — Longing to Depart — 
 Devotional Meditations — The Sight of the Dying — Religion the Business of Life 
 — Faith in the Posthumous Answers to Prayer — Exclusive Dealings with God 
 — "Beyond the Smiling and the Weeping " — Broken-hearted Communion — 
 Longing for Revival — The One Church, the Bride of Christ — Recognitions in 
 Heaven — Last Sabbath in the Sanctuary — Failing Strength — Holy Counsels— 
 The Sick Room— The Gate of Heaven— Dying Sayings — ^The Closing Scene — 
 Her Triumphant Death — Concluding Remarks 396 — 42(5 
 
MEMOIE. 
 
 CHAPTEE I. 
 
 The real believer in the Lord Jesus Christ is truly and 
 emphatically a 'a Hving soul.' Christianity with him is more 
 than a creed, a symbol, or a name ; it is a vital and a vital- 
 izing principle, an incorporate of his moral being : in a word, 
 it is a spiritual life. In his experience the ' glorious gospel 
 of the blessed God is not a myth,' but a Divine verity ; and 
 the truths it reveals are not fictions but attested facts, not 
 dreams but solemn realities. He has passed from death unto 
 life, is a new creature in Christ, has his ' fruit unto holi- 
 ness and the end everlasting life.' And while multitudes are 
 thronging the mere vestibule of the temple, offering their 
 dead sacrifices to a living God ; he, approaching by the * new 
 and living way,' has penetrated within the inner shrine, and, 
 enveloped with the incense-cloud of the great Atoning Sacri- 
 fice, is holding ' fellowship with the Father, and with His 
 Son Christ Jesus.' The highest element of his being is to 
 glorify God here ; and the consummation of his hope here- 
 after will be the enjoyment of God for ever. Thus experi- 
 mentally taught of the Spirit, he is led to disbelieve as a 
 fable, and to reject as an impertinence, every dogma and 
 vanity that would supplant the true gospel of Christ, or that 
 offers itself as a substitute for a real heartfelt experience of 
 the truth. To sanctify and adorn this lower world with such 
 ' living temples' of the Spirit, and to replenish the world to 
 come with their wonder and praise, was the great purpose of 
 God in the gracious mission of His Son to our race. " I am 
 
 (11) 
 
12 MEMOIR OF MIIS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 come that they might have life." " The water that I shall 
 give you shall be in you a well of water springing up into 
 everlasting life." " Know ye not that ye are the temple of 
 God, and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you ?" 
 
 In an age Avhen religious formalism — the bane of the Chris- 
 tian church — is so prevalent; and when even in Christ's 
 quickened body the pulse of spiritual life in many throbs but 
 languidly, it is refreshing to meet with an instance of real, 
 earnest religion, exhibiting in its governing principles, and re- 
 flecting in its daily habit, the power and lustre of a heaven- 
 descending and a heaven-alluring Christianity. Such an 
 example now invites the study of the spiritual mind. And 
 to a spiritual mind only will it possess any degree of interest 
 or attraction. The sentimentalist, whose piety sublimates into 
 dreamy mysticism, — the formalist, whose religion evaporates 
 into ritual observance, — or the romantic, whose ideal of Chris- 
 tianity is the vastness and splendour of heroic achievement, 
 will be conscious of a feehng of disappointment as the eye 
 rolls over these pages. The history they detail, and the 
 character they portray, derives nothing of its incident or its 
 charm from sources equivocal as these. And yet it is no 
 imaginary or inimitable Christian we are about to contem- 
 plate. There was nothing in her principles or example — 
 nothing in the grace which made her what she was, and to 
 which she owed all her hope for eternity — to which the most 
 humble saint may not aspire, and to which the feeblest might 
 not attain. " If none go to heaven but such a man as this, 
 what will become of me ?" was the desponding exclamation 
 of one who witnessed with admiration, yet dismay, the pre- 
 eminently godly conversation of the seraphic Leighton. We 
 anticipate, however, no such feeling of despair as the result 
 of the perusal of this volume. We trust that the life we are 
 about to trace, heavenly and holy though it was, will so ex- 
 hibit the fullness and preciousness of Christ, so illustrate the 
 power and sufficiency of divine grace, and so unfold the lov- 
 ing, winning cliaracter of God, as to stimulate and encourage 
 the lowliest heart that admires its beauty, and would ftiin 
 transcribe its excellence. " Nevertheless, it is of incalculable 
 advantage to have before us some bright examples of saints 
 who have outstripped their competitors, and gained the sum- 
 mit of the hill up which the train of feeble pilgrims is still 
 painfully toiling. Such extraordinary proficients in the life 
 
BIRTH — ANCESTRY. 13 
 
 iirid power of godliness are the salt of the earth to keep it 
 from corruption. They rebuke the slackness of those half- 
 hearted, home-sick mariners who stand off and on, wistfully 
 eying the shore from which they have voluntarily parted, in- 
 stead of launching into the deep, and making sail for a better 
 country." * Such a ' proficient in the life and power of god- 
 hness' we are about to present ; and although a filial hand 
 tremblingly attempts the portrait, it yet will be his single aim 
 so truthfully to delineate each feature of her character as to 
 present her as she really was ; and yet so carefully to veil the 
 glory of the creature as shall constrain all who look upon the 
 picture to magnify the grace of God in her. 
 
 Mrs. Winslow was bom in St. George's, Bermuda, on 
 the 28th of February, 1774. On the paternal side she was 
 of Scotch descent. Her grandfather. Dr. George Forbes, f 
 was a native of Scotland, but resided in Bermuda ; and was 
 united in marriage to the eldest daughter of Thomas Jones, 
 Esq., President of the Council, and during two temporary va- 
 cancies in the administration, acting Governor of the colony. 
 Robert Forbes, the youngest son of this marriage, adopting 
 the profession of his father, pursued his studies in Edinburgh ; 
 and on taking his degree, returned to the island, and after- 
 wards married Mary, the only daughter of Alexander Rush, 
 Esq. Mary Forbes, the subject of this Memoir, was the 
 single issue of this union. 
 
 An only child, and the sole representative of his family, her 
 father's affections and hopes concentrated upon her with no 
 ordinary intensity, and his anxiety to fit her for her future posi- 
 tion in life was proportionably great. No means, therefore, 
 which a cultivated mind could suggest, or ample resources 
 command, were spared in placing within her reach the highest 
 literary advantages. After giving, with his own hands the 
 first form and development to her mind and character, a com- 
 petent tutor was procured from Scotland, to whose educa- 
 tional care the interesting charge was now confided. 
 
 But while her mental training, under her father's super- 
 vision, was thus successfully advancing, another and not less 
 potent influence was silently at work, aiding the formation of 
 a character which, for its natural impressibility and strength, 
 
 « Pearson's Life of Archbishop Leigiitoa. 
 
 f Dr. Forbes belonged to a younger branch of the fifteenth Lord Forbes, 
 of Putechie Castle, Aberdeenshire. 
 
14 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 rendered all tlie more necessary the skilful moulding of a 
 mother's plastic hand. Possessing a remarkably matured 
 judgment, great force of character, and gentleness of disposi- 
 tion, few women were better fitted for the task than Mrs. 
 Forbes. Faithfulness, however, compels us to notice an essen- 
 tial deficiency in her early education, which no intellectual ad- 
 vantages, however great, or parental anxiety, however intense, 
 could supply — we refer to the absence of the Christian element 
 Rehgion, indeed, was not entirely excluded, but it was the 
 religion of form rather than of power. It was not until she 
 had reached the culminating point of life, that Mrs. Forbes 
 became a subject of Divine grace. Up to that period of her 
 history she had been basing her hope of heaven upon a mere 
 ethical rehgion. Those winning traits of disposition and mu- 
 nificent acts of benevolence which invested her character with 
 so great a charm, and which won for her such universal love, 
 were made to take the place of the weightier matters of faith 
 in Christ and love to God. The perusal of Hervey's works, 
 (aided by the letters of her daughter,) in which that deep- 
 thinking writer exposes, by a process of reasoning the most 
 scriptural and convincing, though in a style somewhat florid 
 and diffuse, the fallacy of every hope of justification but by 
 the imputed righteousness of Christ, was the first means, in 
 the hands of the Holy Spirit, of bringing home to her mind a 
 conviction of her lost condition as a sinner, and of unveiling 
 to her eye the sufficiency and beauty of the Lord Jesus as a 
 Saviour. From the moment that she exchanged her own 
 righteousness for the righteousness of Christ, she devoted her- 
 self to the service and glory of her Redeemer with a self- 
 sacrificing zeal and singleness of purpose which never swerved 
 nor faltered to the moment that she finished her Christian 
 career, and peacefully rested from her labours in the eighty- 
 sixth year of her age. 
 
 As the chief interest of this Memoir is derived from the re- 
 ligious character of its subject, we cannot too soon introduce 
 the reader to that period of her history which marks the first 
 inspiration of spiritual life ; prefacing it, however, with a brief 
 record of some of those remarkable providential circumstances 
 in her early and unconverted years, which may be regarded 
 as the foreshadowings of G-od's purposes of love and grace 
 towards her. We quote from a narrative penned by herself, 
 and addressed to her family : — 
 
PROVIDENTIAL PRESERVATIONS. 15 
 
 "I have often promised to relate to you some of God's most 
 gracious dealings towards me in my early life, showing how 
 manifestly His people are preserved in Christ Jesus^ and called. 
 With Paul I may say, I have been in deaths oft by land and 
 sea, by fire and water. The first remarkable event of my life 
 was a sudden recovery from illness when about five years of 
 age, after I had been given over by my father to die. But a 
 more striking providence followed. Soon after my almost 
 miraculous restoration as from the grave, I accompanied my 
 parents during the French war on a visit to England. Our 
 vessel was a light barque, carrying a few guns, and but ill 
 furnished for severe conflict with the enemy. On entering 
 the Channel, and midway between the English and French 
 coasts, a ship of war hove in sight. It was towards night, 
 and as she appeared to bear down upon us, our captain pre- 
 pared for action. My mother and I were hurried from the 
 cabin to what was thought a place of greater safety below. 
 My father remained on deck. All was confusion above us. 
 while I was astonished at being thus suddenly removed from 
 my comfortable berth to the dismal quarters beneath the decks. 
 We had not been long there, when I observed a boy come 
 occasionally to the place of our imprisonment, and with a large 
 horn in his hand take something from out of a barrel, having 
 first fixed a lighted candle upon its edge and leaving it there. 
 Observing, as I sat upon my mother's lap — who was too ab- 
 sorbed in anxiety to notice the circumstance — that the piece 
 of candle was nearly burnt to the edge, I got down, put out 
 my hand and took it away, saying ' Mamma, this will burn 
 the barrel.' It was a cask of gunpowder! Had I not re- 
 moved it at that moment, or, in removing it, had a spark fallen 
 from the lengthened wick, the vessel and all on board must 
 instantly have been blown to atoms. What a wonderful pre- 
 servation from instantaneous and eternal destruction ; for it is 
 not supposed that there was a single person on board who 
 knew the Lord ! " 
 
 As night grew on, concealed by its darkness, the man-of- 
 war passed their little vessel unobserved, and thus, through 
 the good hand of God upon them, they were preserved from 
 captivity on the one hand, and from immediate death on the 
 other. They arrived safely in England, and ;if*-er remaining 
 until the health of Dr. Forbes was restored, they returned to 
 Bermuda, by way of the West Indies. They touched at An- 
 
li^ MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 tigua for a few days, and accepted an invitation to dine and 
 spend the night at the house of a distinguished resident of the 
 island, who asked a large party of the inhabitants to meet 
 them. They retired late, but not many hours had passed when 
 the door of their room was burst open, and a voice of alarm 
 roused them from their sleep with the terrific cry that the 
 house was on fire, urging their immediate escape. Not a mo- 
 ment was to be lost. Her mother, wrapping a portion of the 
 l)edclothe3 round herself and child, rushed from the room, while 
 her father, seizing what valuable things he could, prepared to 
 follow. In a few moments the flames bursting from every 
 part, had completely enveloped the house ; the roof fell in with 
 a tremendous crash, and in a short time the beautiful mansion, 
 which a few hours before had been the brilhant scene of festive 
 hospitality, was now a mass of smouldering ruins. Had they 
 not been aroused at the moment they were, so rapid was the 
 conflagration, they must inevitably have perished. Thus was 
 the life of God's chosen one again redeemed from destruc- 
 tion — still preserved in Christ Jesus. 
 
 Yet another remarkable interposition of God's providence, 
 as occurring in early life, may be given. After a short pas- 
 sage from New York to Bermuda, accompanied by her aunt, 
 they arrived on a beautiful morning in sight of the island. 
 Everything looked promising, and all were rejoicing in the 
 prospect of soon landing amidst the welcomings of relatives 
 and friends. The prospect, as they neared the cluster of 
 islands, was surprisingly lovely. The blue hills in the dis- 
 tance — the tall cedars — the coral shore stretching into a trans- 
 parent ocean — the gentle breeze blowing from the land laden 
 with a thousand perfumes — the blue sky above — and the whole 
 panorama bathed in the warm beams of a southern sun, gave 
 to the entire scene the enchantment of a fairy land. All were 
 prepared for going on shore, waiting but the pilot to come off 
 and conduct them in. But ere an hour had passed, the sky 
 grew dark, storm-clouds gathered, a fearful hurricane, common 
 in these latitudes, suddenly arose, and the vessel, driven out 
 again to sea, threatened every moment to founder. All was 
 now confusion and dismay. In a few moments the masts were 
 cut away, and the deck, washed by the mountain waves, was 
 swept of everything but the caboose. It was an appalling 
 spectacle. Every face gathered paleness, and despair seized 
 every heart. Vessels making for the same port were seen to 
 
PROVIDENTIAL PRESERVATIONS. 17 
 
 go down into the yawning billows with all sail standing. As 
 the sea made a complete breach over the vessel, the officers 
 and crew were compelled to take refuge in the cabin, waiting 
 their expected and almost certain doom. The helm was lashed, 
 and the dismantled hulk, which a few hours before was gal- 
 lantly steering for her port, was now tossed like a log upon 
 the ocean. The first long dreary night was one of horror. In 
 this helpless condition they drifted about for several days, 
 when — the gale having somewhat subsided — coming up to a 
 deserted wreck, w^iich like themselves had suffered in the 
 storm, they took from her the masts and rigging, which lay 
 dangling at her side ; and refitting, as best they could, their 
 disabled vessel, once more made their way to the island, which 
 they reached in safety, and were received by their friends as 
 those whom the sea had given back from the dead. It was a 
 singular providence, that on opening the caboose for the pur- 
 pose of preparing some food, the goat, which had taken refuge 
 there in the storm, sprang out ; and thus, in the absence of 
 the supply of water, which the sea had swept from the decks, 
 afforded a little timely nourishment during the remainder of 
 the passage. In narrating this remarkable deliverance, she 
 adds, " But what of God ? "Was there one grateful heart 
 there ? I am sure mine was not. Oh, the wonders of His 
 love ! Oh, the marvellous goodness and long-suffering of our 
 God ! How much has He borne with my manners in the 
 wilderness ! " 
 
 On the 6th of September, 1791, Miss Forbes was married 
 in St. George's, Bermuda, to Thomas Winslow, Esq., who, 
 with a detachment of his regiment, was at the time quartered 
 in the island. A lineal descendant of Edward Winslow, one 
 of the earhest of the Pilgrim Fathers, and Governor of Ply- 
 mouth colony. Captain Winslow was ennobled in his ancestry. 
 The history of the Pilgrims will ever form one of the most 
 entrancing and instructive chapters in the annals of the Chris- 
 tian church. Although many long years have passed since 
 the "May-flower" sailed out of the waters of Delft Haven, 
 and revolution has succeeded revolution, and school has fol- 
 lowed school in church and state, the memory of the Pilgrims 
 still lives in undimmed, undying interest, more precious and 
 fragrant now than ever. It would seem as if it were especially 
 awarded to the intelligence and piety of the present age to 
 exhibit the principles, to vindicate the cliaracter, and to embalm 
 
18 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 the memory of those distinguished confessors. Certainly no 
 preceding age has j^resented a hght more favourable to the calm, 
 accurate study of their history than the present. Historians, 
 differing from them in ecclesiastical views, yet unblinded by 
 prejudice, have delighted to glorify the grace of God in those 
 holy men and women — who, for conscience' sake, for truth's 
 sake, and for Christ's sake, expatriated themselves from the 
 land of their birth, braved the storms of a winter's voyage, 
 and sought amidst the unbroken and inhospitable wilds of New 
 England the religious liberty denied them at home. Linked 
 by her marriage with this "noble array of martyrs," was now 
 the subject of our Memoir. Nor did she prove an unworthy 
 graft of a stem so honoured. In the evangelical principles 
 which she maintained, in the strong faith she exhibited, in the 
 patience in suffering and the fortitude in adversity which she 
 exemplified, the spirit of the Pilgrims would seem to have 
 revived in her. 
 
 It would, perhaps, be unnecessary, under ordinary circum- 
 stances, to venture more than a passing allusion to the history 
 of her marriage ; but, as this event wears somewhat of a reli- 
 gious aspect, it being connected with the first real prayer she 
 is supposed ever to have offered, a more circumstantial detail 
 may be expected. 
 
 Entered upon at an age of extreme youth and warm im- 
 pulse, with but a slight knowledge of the world, and deprived 
 of a father's gentle but firm control, we conceal not that the 
 step as taken by her involved a degree of responsibility and 
 hazard too serious for ordinary prudence to justify. That it 
 was in every respect a suitable alliance, yielding to its latest 
 hour unmingled happiness, must be traced to something beyond 
 the sagacity and forethought of a warm-hearted and confiding 
 girl, of but eighteen bright summers. Referring to it in after 
 years, she remarks, " I acted wrong ; but God most wonder- 
 fully and mercifully directed the whole, and overruled the evil 
 for our good and for His own glory." The ' evil ' to which 
 she here so ingenuously refers was the impetuosity which led 
 her to act, in so momentous a matter, independently of author- 
 ity. Adverse to her marrying in the army, as necessarily in- 
 volving a wide separation from her child, her mother had dis- 
 couraged several military suitors for her daughter's hand, and 
 had as decidedly opposed the attentions of Lieut. Winslow. 
 But her heart's young affections were secretly and irrevocably 
 
FIRST PRAYER. 19 
 
 surrendered, not only to the most admired and beloved officer 
 in his regiment, but to one whose station in life and whose 
 personal excellence were worthy of her confidence. That 
 with a step involving so much excited natural feeling there 
 should be blended a sentiment so thoughtful and sacred as that 
 which we are about to record is, doubtless, the most remark- 
 able and instructive feature in the narrative. Her own pen 
 the most appropriately and beautifully pursues the story. 
 
 "Now nearly eighteen, gay, thoughtless, full of life and 
 vivacity, I felt my freedom and enjoyed it. Three companies 
 of the 47th Regiment arrived at Bermuda from New Provi- 
 dence. The new comers soon obtained introduction to the 
 leading families of the island, and greatly increased its gaieties. 
 It was more than a year before I became sensible of the at- 
 tractions and attentions of one of the officers. These atten- 
 tions grew more marked. My mother became alarmed. I 
 was immediately sent from home, and placed under the care 
 of an aunt residing several miles from town. One day a gen- 
 tleman came out to dinner. In the course of the conversation 
 he casually mentioned that orders had come from New Provi- 
 dence for Lieut. Winslow to join the regiment there. This 
 intelligence went like a dagger to my heart. In vain I strove 
 to disguise my feelings, — bursting into tears, I left the table. 
 Then was I convinced that my heart was not my own. I retired 
 to my room to reflect upon my course. I knew the Governor 
 could not interpose, nor had the Colonel in command power to 
 detain an officer under orders from head-quarters. My happiness 
 was at stake. Great was my distress, intense my agony of 
 mind. "Who could prevent his going ? The thought suddenly 
 occurred to me, — God can ! In a moment I arose, locked my 
 door, and fell upon my knees before Him, It was my first 
 prayer ! In the simplest form of words imaginable, I earnestly 
 pleaded with the Lord not only to prevent his going, but to 
 give him to me as my husband. The prayer was offered — the 
 request was made, — and I arose from my knees with a spirit 
 as light as a feather. My sadness and anxiety all were gone. 
 Was not this of God ? Was not this faith in the power of 
 God ? What brought such instantaneous and perfect relief to 
 my distressed heart? Was it not that God gave me the 
 power to believe that He would grant me my request ? The 
 next day, with the permission of my aunt, I mounted my 
 horse, and attended l^y a servant, rode into town. To my 
 
20 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 astonishment my mother received me affectionately, and uttered 
 not a word of rebuke at my return. The Lord had turned 
 her heart. That evening I met the object of my ajQfections. 
 The proposal of a private marriage was made, and, after some 
 trembling hesitation, was acceded to. The next morning — a 
 hcence having been procured — we met at the house of my 
 
 friend, Judge L , and from thence, accompanied by two 
 
 of the officers and the wife of one of them, we went to the 
 house of the clergyman of the parish,* where I was united in 
 the bonds of holy wedlock to the man of my choice, the be- 
 loved of my heart. The first emotion of my mother, when 
 the intelhgence was broken to her, was distress ; the second 
 was love. I was received and forgiven. Never had she 
 reason to regret my choice. She loved my husband as her 
 own son, and an affectionate son he proved. Thus was my 
 prayer answered three days only after I had offered it up to 
 that God with whom all things are possible. From the mo- 
 ment I uttered that prayer, every obstacle which before seemed 
 insurmountable was removed. "Was there not faith in that 
 prayer — faith in the power of God? Surely there was; and 
 yet how many years did it lie beneath the rubbish of the fall ! 
 Still I was His, and my precious husband was His, and we 
 were to be the honoured parents of many that should be His, 
 some to preach His blessed Gospel, and all, I trust, to be united 
 together in one band of love at His right hand through an 
 endless eternity." 
 
 In throwing back a glance upon the preceding narrative, 
 fidehty as a Christian biographer, yet blended with the most 
 sacred filial reverence, would seem to demand from the pen 
 that records it, an observation in reference to the principle of 
 action which she herself, in moments of calm reflection, and 
 when true religion had become enthroned upon her heart, so 
 honestly and emphatically deprecated. There were two points 
 in her marriage which render the self-responsible course she 
 adopted such as no reasoning could commend, and the imita- 
 tions of which, no results, however overruled by God, could 
 justify. The one was, — the too excited feelings which were 
 allowed to control the judgment, and the other, — the acting in 
 opposition to a parent's wishes. It is true, there does not ap- 
 pear to have been any express command or positive injunction ; 
 but surely it was enough to know that her mother disapproved 
 
 * Tt was then the custom to celebrate marriages in private houses. 
 
mCFLECTIONS. 21 
 
 of the step, to have dictated a more reflective course. " Honour 
 thy father and thy mother," is a divine precept of such impor- 
 tance in God's sight, as to be annexed to the promise, " that 
 thy days may be long in the land which the Lord thy God 
 giveth thee." In no step in life (and for the youthful reader 
 of these pages we especially venture upon the remark) — for 
 none involves consequences of such moment — is a child more 
 imperiously and solemnly bound to recognize parental authori- 
 ty than that which Miss Forbes now took. We are not pre- 
 pared to say that in all similar cases a parent's judgment may 
 be the best — for it may be warped by prejudice, or be con- 
 trolled by unworthy influence, — yet no circumstances what- 
 ever can justify an entire abnegation, on the part of the child, 
 of that sacred relation which God has made a beautiful type of 
 His owp^ and which imparts to the domestic constitution its 
 dignity and strength. 
 
 And yet that first prayer ! Ah ! who can adequately de- 
 scribe i .s preciousness and importance ? It is the first breath 
 of God — the first pulse of spiritual life — the first dawn of end- 
 less gk ry in the soul. How many an earnest pastor, how 
 many a pious parent, how many a fond friend anxiously waits 
 the blfssed announcement — "Behold, he prayeth !" That 
 faint scintillation of spiritual life may retire, as if quenched in 
 utter d'.rkness, and long and dreary may be the night that 
 enshrouds it ; but at some future day it will reappear — for it 
 was in .perishable — and realize, in its fulness of blessing, the 
 hope it? first pale gleam had inspired. Blessed truth ! the 
 little sc ed of grace, once dropped into the soul, will germinate, 
 ' take rrot downward and bear fruit upward' unto life eternal. 
 
 Passing over several years subsequent to her marriage — 
 years spent in military life, and, although not devoid of much 
 that w.'uS interesting and eventful, yet supplying in their his- 
 tory hu^ little material in keejDing with the grave character 
 of this volume — we proceed to record that momentous event 
 which f^ave to all her future life its reality, sanctity, and charm. 
 
CHAPTER 11. 
 
 To a mind in sympathy with the beautiful in nature, there 
 are few spectacles more exquisitely enjoyable than the day- 
 dawn in spring. To watch the gradual dissolving of night's 
 deep shadows into grey twihght, — the twilight blushing into 
 the rose-hue of morning — to catch the iirst new-born ray trem- 
 bling in the eastern sky, all nature starting from its slumber, 
 and hymning its early praise to the Creator, who " maketh 
 the outgoings of the morning and the evening to rejoice" — is 
 a scene of intense interest and beauty. But to a mind sensi- 
 ble of moral beauty, transcendently more lovely is the day- 
 dawn of grace in the soul. To trace the first faint glimmer of 
 spiritual light struggling with the darkness of the mind — to 
 behold that mind gradually emerging from its night of gloom 
 into the calm sunshine of a new spiritual creation, and to watch 
 its progress as it " shineth more and more unto the perfect 
 day," is a spectacle of yet surpassing grandeur. Such a pic- 
 ture, as sketched by her own pen, we are about to contem- 
 plate : 
 
 " From the age of ten years I have been in the habit of 
 reading to my mother, every night, the ' Whole Duty of Man.' 
 This book, I believe, brought me under a law-work of soul. 
 After my marriage, I discontinued reading it, but still what I 
 had read was impressed upon my mind and memory. Often 
 would the thought come over me, ' How can such a one as I 
 get to heaven ? Heaven is a good place, and only the good 
 go there. Oh, if I could but cease from sin and keep the 
 Commandments.' Sometimes I shut myself up, and with the 
 the ' Whole Duty of Man' or the Prayer Book in my hand, 
 upon my knees I have solemnly promised I would keep all the 
 Commandments, and while doing this have felt greatly relieved 
 of my burden, as if the work were done that was to fit me for 
 heaven. But ere the day was over, my goodness had passed 
 away, and I felt as unfit as ever for the abodes of the holy and 
 the good. At other times I thought I was not worse than 
 most people, and that God was too good to condemn the whole 
 world. During this period I never hinted my feelings to my 
 husband : I was afraid he would think from my distress of 
 (22) 
 
FIRST CONVICTIONS OP SIN. 23 
 
 mind that I had committed some dreadful sin, nor could I ex- 
 plain my views to him. I heard no gospel, though a constant 
 attendant at church. Once I ventured to go to the Lord's 
 Table, and recollect shedding tears at hearing of the sufferings 
 of Christ. But soon after I relapsed into the ways of the 
 world and forgot my vows. A young creature, the wife of 
 one of the officers, died at a place where our regiment was 
 quartered. Her death greatly shocked me, as I feared she 
 was not good enough, any more than myself, to go to heaven, 
 I was in the room when she died ; but as we were under 
 orders for Bermuda, I soon, in the bustle and excitement of 
 preparing for the voyage, forgot the serious impression her 
 death made upon me ; but still an earnest desire more or less 
 followed me to try and commend myself to God, and make 
 myself fit for heaven. I often hoped I might die of a linger- 
 ing disease, as that would afford me more time for repentance. 
 "Soon after my marriage I was at a ball; I was then a 
 bride, receiving much attention, and my pride was gratified. 
 I had married the man I loved, and who loved me in return. 
 My mother was more than reconciled to the step I had taken 
 — she was pleased. I had everything my carnal heart could 
 desire, not a wish was ungratified. I was at the very zenith 
 of earthly happiness. On returning from the ball, I took a 
 hasty review of the evening I had passed as I lay sleepless 
 upon my pillow. The glitter — the music — the dance — the 
 excitement — the attention — the pleasure, all passed before me. 
 But oh, I felt a want I could not describe. I sighed, and 
 whispered to myself these expressive words : ' Is this all ?' I 
 felt at the moment that if this were all the happiness the world 
 could bestow, then was there a lack I knew not how to sup- 
 ply, and a void I could not fill. I had reached the very sum- 
 mit of earthly bliss, and found it to fall short of what my 
 heart craved, and my soul required. Prom this time I grew 
 more fond of retirement, and less inclined to mingle with the 
 gay world. I felt that what I had been pursuing in the early 
 part of my life was not happiness. I turned from it with a 
 sensation of loathing, and sought in solitude what I had never 
 found in the brilliant and crowded walks of life. I thought 
 that there must be a state where real happiness was to be 
 found. In this condition of mind I continued for years, striv- 
 ing to keep the law, and to shape my course by the ' Whole 
 Duty of Man.' I endeavoured to walk so as to please God, 
 
24 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 but again and again my best resolutions were broken. These 
 feelings I concealed from all around me, for I would not for 
 the world have breathed a hint that I was unhappy to the 
 dearest friend. I saw every one around me apparently happy 
 in the possession of the world which had lost its charm for me. 
 I now sought peace of mind in domestic enjoyment. I was 
 encircled by my children, possessed a husband who anticipated 
 my fondest wish, and my heart could sigh for nothing of 
 earthly bliss which I did not possess — and still I was unhappy. 
 I was a sinner, — and this secret conviction beclouded every 
 prospect, and embittered every cup." 
 
 Such were the mental exercises — sad, yet hopeful — which 
 foreshadowed the day-spring from on high in her heart. It 
 was now the twilight of grace in her soul. The dark clouds 
 which had so long enshrouded her were breaking, and this 
 dreary night of weeping was fast retiring before the dawning 
 splendour of a morning of joy. After living a military life 
 for some years, Captain Winslow was induced to retire to an 
 ancestral estate near Romford, in Essex. But change of place 
 and diversity of scene supply no real relief to a mind burdened 
 with sin. Referring to her removal, she remarks : 
 
 " While here I was conscious — though surrounded by every 
 earthly comfort, and by all I loved, and had more time for 
 reading and reflection — of the same lack I had felt years be- 
 fore. My mind was restless. My soul wanted what earth 
 could not supply. And yet I could not describe to any one 
 what I needed, nor what I felt. I was unhappy — at times mis- 
 erable ; my weary soul thirsting for what it had not, and yet 
 I could not answer myself, and say what that one thing was." 
 
 It was no longer possible to conceal from her husband a sad- 
 ness which, like the spoiler, wrapped itself within the folds of 
 every flower of earthly good. The quick eye of affection de- 
 tected a lurking sorrow, the cause of which baffled his ingenu- 
 ity to discover. He marked the pallor of her cheek, the stifled 
 sigh, and the vain attempt at cheerfulness. It was enough, 
 however, to know that she was unha]vpy ; attributing it to the 
 solitude of their residence, he instantly resolved upon an ex- 
 pedient for its relief. On returning home one day, he informed 
 her that he had taken a house in town, and proposed an imme- 
 diate removal. The idea of a change was pleasing, and in a 
 short time they were fully established in their new abode. In 
 all this God's hand was signally moving. He was loading her 
 
ST. JAMES'S CHAPEL, PENTONVILLE. 25 
 
 blind steps by a way she knew not, but it was to bring her soul, 
 panting for the " living water," to the spring whence it flowed. 
 It does not appear that the ministry of the parish church in 
 which her new residence was situate was of a character calcu- 
 lated to meet the exigencies of such a case. There was the 
 absence of that evangelical element which could alone consti- 
 tute it a message of " life and spirit " to its hearers. Referring 
 to it, she says, "There was nothing to satisfy my soul." The 
 first event marking God's overruling providence in this change 
 of residence was the appointment, just at this juncture, of the 
 Rev. Thomas Sheppard to the perpetual curacy of St. James's 
 Episcopal Chapel, Pentonville, and who, seven years after- 
 wards, succeeded to the rectory of Clerkenwell. " How beau- 
 tiful are the feet of them that preach the gospel of peace, and 
 bring glad tidings of good things !" Never did these expres- 
 sive words of the evangelical prophet receive a more striking 
 illustration than now. Mr. Slieppard was a decided man of 
 God, and an able minister of the New Testament. His minis- 
 try, sound in doctrine, and richly experimental in its character, 
 was accompanied by an earnestness of spirit, and a persuasive- 
 ness of address, which at once met the peculiar state of mind 
 it was designed to relieve. Thus two individuals under the 
 especial guidance of God entered the parish of Pentonville 
 almost simultaneously. The one was a soul bowed down with 
 grief for sin, and who could in nowise lift up herself — the 
 other was a messenger of peace, whose ministry of grace was 
 to loosen her bonds, and set her captive spirit free. For her 
 sake his feet were guided thither, little divining, doubtless, for 
 what especial intent his Master had thus brought him. But 
 the narrative is best and more fully told by herself: 
 
 "The change of residence was pleasant to me. I was thrown 
 more amongst my friends, and for awhile my mind was diverted 
 from its gloom. We were near the Chapel of Ease. I went, 
 but there was nothing to satisfy my soul. The minister had 
 been preaching here for twenty-one years, but now it was the 
 Lord's time that he should be removed, and that a real shep- 
 herd should take his place. I went, and heard from the new 
 minister, for the first time in my life, the precious gospel op 
 PEACE. This was what I had wanted to know for many years, 
 that Jesus Christ had come into the world to save poor sinners. 
 I was a sinner, and wanted to be saved. Oh, how eagerly I 
 listened, and drank in every word ! I had been in vain trying 
 2 
 
26 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 to work out mj salvation, but my \voik always fell short, and 
 left me as poor and miserable as ever. Now was held out to 
 me the hope that I might be saved by the work of another — the 
 work of Jesus Christ. With one observation of Mr. Sheppard I 
 was much impressed. Describing my spiritual state of mind 
 on one occasion he most solemnly said, ' If there is such an 
 individual present, I will pledge my soul for it that that in- 
 dividual is in the way to Christ.' With this remark I was 
 deeply struck. I thought the free invitation of the gospel he 
 was presenting must be true, since this godly man was willing 
 to risk his soul upon the trutli of what he was asserting. Oh, 
 if this were true, I might after all be saved ! My heart and 
 mind were now at work. I repaired to my Bible, and searched 
 it again and again. By grace are ye saved through faiih^ and 
 that not of yourselves^ it is the gift of God, was a passage that 
 arrested my attention. I found that in the Epistle of James 
 we were justified by works, and my heart sank within me. I 
 had no works, and could do none pleasing and acceptable to 
 God. In the Epistles of Paul I read that we were justified by 
 faith. There seemed a contradiction. My anxious mind could 
 find no rest, but still I felt a ray of hope dawn upon my be- 
 nighted soul, and continued to hear the precious truth as one 
 hungering and thirsting for divine knowledge. One night, 
 watching alone by the side of a sick child, I took my Bible 
 and searched the Scriptures. The question how the sinner 
 could be justified, pressed heavily upon my mind. If I could 
 be saved by faith in the righteousness of another^ then I felt 
 that there was hope for me ; but if there was anything for 
 me to do towards meriting this salvation, I saw I must be 
 forever lost. I read first one epistle and then another, when 
 as I read, the words w^ere brought to my mind, AsJc, and ye 
 shall receive. I reasoned, who is it that says this ? It is God. 
 Can God lie? It is impossible. He must do what he has' 
 said. He has commanded, Aslc, and ye shall receive. I will 
 ask. I fell upon my knees and pleaded the promise. My 
 petition was offered in the simple language of an untutored 
 child. I knew nothing of Christian experience, had heard the 
 gospel but a few times, and the only thing that had fastenad 
 itself upon my mind was the truth that a poor sinner could be 
 saved. Thus I went to God and pleaded the promise, asking 
 him how such a wretched sinner as I was could be s;'v >d. 
 I did not wrestle so much for my salvation as to know hoio I 
 
MORNING OF JOY. 27 
 
 could be saved as a helpless sinner that could do nothing. I 
 arose from my knees, and again took my Bible. I read and 
 compared scripture with scripture, but the one part appeared 
 to contradict the other, and my mind was left in darkness and 
 perplexity. Again I carried the promise to the throne of 
 grace, and again wrestled with the Lord. I returned to my 
 Bible, but it was yet a sealed book. The third time I ventured 
 near the Lord, still pleading this one gracious promise, Ask, 
 and ye shall receive. In an instant light broke in upon my 
 soul. Jesus stood before me and spoke these blessed words, — 
 I AM THY SALVATION ! I hailed the glad tidings — my heart 
 and soul responded — Jesus was with me — He had himself 
 spoken — I had seen the Lord — had heard His voice — my soul 
 was saved — my burden was gone — the grave-clothes in which 
 I had been so long confined fell off — my spirit was free, and I 
 seemed to soar towards heaven in the sweetest, richest enjoy- 
 ment — my heart filled with a joy unspeakable. I arose from 
 my knees to adore, and praise, and bless His holy name. Oh, 
 what a night was that, never, never, to be forgotten ! I had 
 seen Jesus. It was no vision of the bodily senses that I saw ; 
 but I had no more doubt that I was a redeemed and pardoned 
 sinner, that I had seen Christ, and held communion with Him 
 who died that I might live, than I had of my own existence. 
 It was with difficulty I could refrain from calling up the whole 
 house to hear what the Lord had done for my soul, I thought 
 all would believe and rejoice too, so ignorant was I. As soon 
 as it was morning I informed my husband of what the Lord 
 had done for me. He looked amazed at what I said, and 
 feared I should lose my senses. I was grieved that he did 
 not believe and could not understand, and urged him, by every 
 argument I could employ, to seek for the same blessing, which 
 I was sure the Lord would give him. 
 
 " It has since been evident to myself, that when the Holy 
 Ghost gave me the promise to plead, He also gave me a 
 measure of faith to credit God for its fulfilment, and in answer- 
 ing the prayer of simple faith, Christ came into my soul with 
 a full and free salvation. / am thy salvation ! This was good 
 news indeed, fresh from heaven. Christ was mine, heaven 
 was mine, — all care and sorrow had vanished, and I Avas as 
 happy as I could be in the body. I had found what I had 
 long sought. I had been in search of real happiness for years, 
 and in one night I found it all in Jesus. God's richest tre;is- 
 
28 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 ury had been thrown open to my view, and in Him I found all 
 I wanted for time and eternity. In this happy frame I con- 
 tinued many weeks, imploring all I knew and loved to come to 
 Christ, but none understood me. I began to think that no one 
 knew Jesus Christ but dear Mr. Sheppard and myself, and 
 often felt that if I had met a chimney sweep in the street that 
 knew and loved Christ, I could embrace him as a brother." 
 
 Such is the simple, glowing narrative of one upon whose 
 soul the Sun of Righteousness had just arisen. In the earnest- 
 ness of rehgious feeling breathing through these genuine utter- 
 ances of the heart, the reader may trace the leading character- 
 istic of her subsequent Christian life. That at this early period 
 of her new birth there was much holy zeal, as yet unaccom- 
 panied with deep Christian experience, she always meekly 
 acknowledged. She thought every mind would believe her 
 simple story, and that every heart would sympathize with her 
 holy joy. She needed the helping hand of an advanced Chris- 
 tian. It would appear, however, that in the absence of per- 
 sonal intercourse with living saints, she met with the works of 
 that eminent man of God, the Rev. John Newton, Rector of 
 Olney, whose richly experimental writings, clothed in beautiful 
 simplicity of style, were admirably adapted to her state of 
 mind, and were richly owned of God in deepening her Christian 
 knowledge and experience. To the latest period of her life she 
 referred with gratitude to the benefit she had derived from his 
 writings, and one of the books found in her room after death 
 was a volume of her favourite author, John Newton. The 
 foregoing remarks are thus borne out in her continued biog- 
 raphy : — 
 
 " Some months after this Satan w^as permitted to try my 
 young faith, and to cast a cloud over my mind. Unbelief 
 began to work. I feared I might be mistaken, as I could meet 
 with none among all my friends who either understood what I 
 said, or knew what I had experienced. Had I then a matured 
 Christian to whom I could have opened my heart, it would 
 have been a great comfort. And yet it was well it was so, 
 that I might flee, not to an arm of flesh, but to the living God. 
 My mind was brought into darkness. The sensible presence 
 of Christ was withdrawn, and sadness filled my heart. I sought 
 Him but found Him not ; I prayed, but received no comfort. 
 Pacing my room one day under this dark dispensation, and 
 fearing I never again should enjoy what I once had, I threw 
 
SPIRITUAL CONFLICTS. 29 
 
 myself upon my knees, and cried to the Lord to come and 
 bless me if I had not deceived myself. In a moment, in con- 
 descending love, the same precious Jesus stood before me as 
 He did at the first, saying, O thou of little faith, zoherefore didst 
 thou doubt f I well recollect my answer. Clasping my hands 
 in ecstacy, I exclaimed, ' My Lord, and my God ! I cannot 
 and will not doubt; forgive my base ingratitude.' Over- 
 whelmed with that blessed interview, I thought I never, no, 
 never would doubt again. Satan fled from the presence of 
 the Lord, and I was left alone with God, — 7ny God, my own 
 God. I could not tell my joy, and no one understood my feel- 
 ings. At this tim.e I became acquainted with the writings of 
 the Rev. John Newton. I read them with great delight, and 
 if he had been alive, I would have walked miles to have con- 
 versed with him." 
 
 It was not long before the providence of God guided to her 
 door the steps of a deeply-taught, aged Christian in humble 
 life. To him she opened her heart, and found a warm response. 
 He kindly took her by the hand, and in lowliness of mind she 
 yielded herself to his instructions. In a letter to her mother 
 she thus refers to this auspicious circumstance : — 
 
 "I enclose you a note from a poor man addressed to me. 
 He is poor in this Avorld's goods, but rich in faith. He watches 
 over me as a father Avould a child, and I believe loves me as 
 much. He visits me often, comforts and reproves, and en- 
 deavours to build me up in my most holy faith ; and when he 
 cannot come, he writes to me. He is a most pious, excellent 
 Christian. His thoughts and whole heart are continually in 
 heaven. Oh, that I were but more like him ! 
 
 It is an interesting fact, that on her return from abroad 
 some years afterwards, she sought out her early Christian in- 
 structor, found him much advanced in years, in ill-health, and 
 the occupant of an alms-house. Thither she frequently re- 
 paired, bearing with her some httle temporal comfort, and 
 often receiving in return a word of spiritual blessing. She oc- 
 casionally invited him to her house, and administered to his 
 necessities, until the venerable pilgrim exchanged his lowly 
 abode on earth for the many-mansioned home of his Father in 
 Heaven. 
 
 The following letter addressed to her mother at Bermuda, 
 with which we close this chapter, whilst it confirms the pleasing 
 fact of her parent's spiritual change, evidences at the same 
 
80 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 time the remarkable clearness and growth of her own views 
 of divine truth ; and in the illness of her husband, to which it 
 refers, foreshadows those trying dispensations which afterwards 
 gave such maturity to her Christianity, and rendered her so 
 extensively useful in comforting others with the comfort with 
 which she herself had been comforted of God : — 
 
 " My dearest Mother, October 22, 1810. 
 
 "... Thank God you are all well ; but above 
 all things, I desire to thank and bless His holy name that you 
 and Bella are so wonderfully brought to know yourselves, and 
 to know Him whom to know is life everlasting. Blessed be 
 God, who passes by so many, and who has deigned to look 
 upon us who were lying as others, dead in sin. Infinite in 
 sovereignty, infinite in goodness, infinite in power ! why He 
 passes by some and calls others, is only known to Himself; 
 but there is a time coming when we shall know even as we 
 are known, and be enabled to see that He acts consistently 
 with his goodness and mercy. All we have to do in this vale 
 of tears is to press forward to the glorious prize He has 
 placed in our view, looking continually to Jesus, trusting not 
 to our own strength, but waiting in humble dependence upon 
 Him for all our sufficiency to carry us on, and to enable us to 
 hold out unto the end. He that has promised is true and 
 faithful to His w^ord. Oh, that we may be found like His be- 
 loved handmaiden of old, sitting at His feet. His eye is ever 
 upon His dear, dependent flock ; He knows all our need, and 
 has promised to supply it. But for these things He will be 
 inquired of. It is at a throne of grace Jesus makes Himself 
 known to His saints, comforts them, revives their drooping 
 spirits with a view of those blessings He has in store for them. 
 This world is not our home — we look for a better. His people 
 are pilgrims here on earth, and generally are a poor and af- 
 flicted people. They have not their portion here as thousands 
 have, —their portion is to come. Their names are w^ritten in 
 the book of life, and were written before the foundation of 
 the world. They are as dear to Him as the apple of His eye. 
 Then what have we to fear? nothing; but everything to hope. 
 Blessed be God who sent His only Son to pay our debt, to 
 rescue us from the power of Satan, to cleanse us from all our 
 guilt, to clothe our souls with His righteousness, and thereby 
 give us a rightful claim to a crovxai of glory. Blessed be that 
 
LETTER TO HER MOTHER. 31 
 
 dear Son who condescended to come amongst us, to assume 
 our nature, and to do for us what we had no power to do for 
 ourselves. And blessed be the Holy Spirit, who in infinite 
 mercy forms and prepares us for the heavenly kingdom. I 
 
 am dehghted to find dear B has such clear views of the 
 
 doctrine of the Atonement. And oh, that they may reach 
 her heart, and influence all her thoughts, words, and actions. 
 My last letter will have informed you that the children's ill- 
 ness was occasioned by the measles, and my precious husband's 
 from a rupture of a blood-vessel in the lungs. These things 
 altogether, have been a severe trial to mind and body, but I 
 have been in a most wonderful manner supported under them. 
 I have gone through enough to kill a dozen women stronger 
 than myself; but the Lord has fulfilled the promise, and given 
 me strength according to my day. 
 
 " On Monday evening I heard a very popular minister, 
 who was to preach at a chapel in Lincoln's Inn Fields. I 
 waited some time until the doors were opened, and then ob- 
 tained a seat near the pulpit. But although the place was 
 large, every part was densely crowded, and people standing 
 in the aisles. The preacher was Alexander Fletcher, from 
 Scotland, a young man of about twenty-two. But oh, how 
 zealous, fervent, and inexpressibly great and sweet in ex- 
 plaining the glad tidings of salvation ! His discourse was 
 addressed to children particularly, and he has such uncommon 
 power in directing and fixing the attention of both old and 
 young, that I do not believe the eyes of either were off him 
 during the whole service. This good steward of Jesus preaches 
 almost every evening in some part or other of London. Oh, 
 when I see such servants of the Lord spending their strength, 
 their lives, their all for God, and counting it nothing so that 
 they might win Christ, I look at myself and mourn over my 
 unprofitableness, and desire to lie low in the dust. This good, 
 zealous man of God, though followed by crowds, appears 
 humble and lowly, like his blessed Master. Oh, my dear 
 mamma, how I long to have you with me, where you may 
 hear the blessed gospel preached in a thousand places. How 
 precious it is in the ear of the redeemed ! It is the soul's food, 
 and we grow lean and lukewarm without it. May every cove- 
 nant blessing attend you, is the prayer of your affectionate 
 daughter, M. W." 
 
CHAPTEK III. 
 
 The earnest and practical character of her religion soon be- 
 came apparent. The yearning of her heart for the spiritual 
 well-being of others, which now appeared, was not less the 
 natural outflow of her new-born feelings than the forecastings 
 of her future devotedness. The fervent zeal to which her 
 Christianity gave birth, and which was but now in the first 
 pantings of its inspiration, she retained in all its bloom until 
 death. It was natural that those of her own house should oc- 
 cupy her first thoughts, and share her deepest sympathies. As 
 a follower of Christ, she stood alone in her family. She felt 
 her responsibility and resolved to act. Her first step in carry- 
 ing out this her solemn resolution to serve the Lord was the 
 erection, of what until now had no place in her domestic circle 
 — a family altar to God. The accomplishment of her purpose 
 demanded no little moral courage, wisdom, and firmness. The 
 proposal was submitted to her husband, and though kindly, 
 was yet strongly opposed. But the conviction of duty was too 
 deep to be overcome. The energy of will, and the remarkable 
 grace which in after years confronted and vanquished difficul- 
 ties in the way of duty more formidable, and which bore her 
 through trials yet more severe, crovvmed this her first work and 
 testimony for God with the most pleasing success. Consent 
 was at length given ; the effort was made in God's strength, 
 and God blessed it. The family and household were convened 
 for what to them was a novel yet impressive service. Her 
 husband, at first declining to be present, was there. She con- 
 ducted the service, read a portion of God's word, and then all 
 but one of that circle knelt while she offered solemn prayer, — 
 the father of that worshipping family alone stood. But when 
 again they assembled, that heart was subdued, its hostility dis- 
 armed, and side by side with his wife and little ones he bent 
 the knee before their Father in heaven. From this moment 
 (32) 
 
FAMILY WORSHIP. 33 
 
 the fire enkindled on that domestic altar never went out. 
 Whether at home or abroad, journeying on the land, or voy- 
 aging upon the sea, family prayer was never omitted. "As 
 for me and my house, we will serve the Lord," was a holy 
 resolve with which no other engagements ever were allowed 
 to interfere. From the commencement of her Christian course 
 until its close, her grand and single aim was to live for God. 
 To Him her first thoughts, first time, first duties were given. 
 All other and secondary calls, duties, and claims were held in 
 stern abeyance. "Seek jq first the kingdom of God and His 
 righteousness," was the precept in which she undeviatingly 
 walked, leaving God to fulfil as most faithfully he did, the 
 promise with which it is annexed, " and all things else shall 
 be added unto you." Happy if her holy example— the exam- 
 ple of one ever conscious of her own weakness, yet knowing 
 wherein her great strength lay — shall confirm the wavering 
 purpose, or encourage the hesitating heart of some feeble, timid 
 witness for the Lord. Alas ! how many professedly Christian 
 households are there without a family altar, simply because 
 there are no hands in that circle strong enough in faith to rear 
 it, and no hearts fervent enouo-h in love to light its sacred fires. 
 But how grievous the twofold sin, — first, the neglect of a sacred 
 and binding duty ; and then to limit, in its performance, the 
 promised grace and strength of the Holy One of Israel ! The 
 believer should ever remember, that God has enjoined no pre- 
 cept unaccompanied by a promise ; and that it is only as we 
 are found walking in filial, unreserved obedience to the one, 
 that he is found faithfully and fully performing the other. 
 Christ enjoins upon His disciples no yoke, and imposes no bur- 
 den — calls to no service, and sends no trial — for which He 
 does not vouchsafe all requisite aid. " My grace is sufficient 
 for thee," is a promise which embraces in its illimitable range 
 every member, and all the circumstances of each member, of 
 the household of faith. Looking, then, to Him, " Let the 
 weak say I am strong:" let the timid "glory in their infirmi- 
 ties ;" and let those who are cast down exclaim, " In the Lord 
 have I righteousness and strength." Apposite to these re- 
 marks is the following extract from one of her letters to her 
 mother : — 
 
 "Do you, my dearest mamma, have family prayer? I hope 
 
 you do, B and you are of one mind, and when only two 
 
 or three meet together to worship God, He has promised to be 
 2* 
 
34 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 amongst them. He has not said to the seeking seed of Israel, 
 Seek ye my face in vain. How pleasing it is to the Lord 
 when we are enabled, in spite of an ensnaring world, to erect 
 an altar to Him in our house, and say with Joshua, As for me 
 and my house, we will serve the Lord. Call the servants to- 
 gether, read a portion of Scripture, and go to prayer. If you 
 have not yet been able to do this, I hope you will do it. Let 
 the wicked laugh ; let them call you by what names they may ; 
 be not afraid, for more are they icho are for you, than those who 
 are against you. You have all the saints on earth, and all the 
 saints in glory, and all the angels in heaven, and best of all, 
 God Himself on your side. And if God be for you, who can 
 be against you ? You fight under a good Captain, the Cap- 
 tain of your salvation, who will make you more than con- 
 queror. I would earnestly recommend to you extempore 
 prayer. Lay aside your forms of prayer, and the Lord Him- 
 self will teach you to pray from the heart. The blessed Spirit 
 has promised to help our infirmities in prayer." 
 
 Among the first general objects which enlisted her Chris- 
 tian sympathies and efforts, was the spiritual condition of her 
 own native isle. In St. George, the metropolis of the Bermu- 
 das — a beautiful group of islands bestudding the bosom of the 
 Atlantic ocean — there still resided her mother, and a wide cir- 
 cle of kindred and friends. God had done much, in point of 
 natural scenery and salubrity of climate, for the Bermudas. 
 Few spots in this beautiful, though fallen creation, concentrate 
 so much varied loveliness, and of so high a tone, as do these 
 isles of the sea. Poetry, in some of her sweetest, if not her 
 most truthful strains, has often sung their praises ; while his- 
 tory, with perhaps more stern fidelity, has awarded them an 
 honourable page in its no less interesting annals. Nor to poetry 
 and history alone are the Bermudas indebted for their fame. 
 Invalids from distant climes, attenuated by disease, and aban- 
 doned by hope, who have repaired to these islands, seeking 
 but to eke out an enfeebled existence yet a little longer, and 
 to meet death with mitigated suffering, have, beneath their 
 soft skies, and fanned by their balmy breezes, been restored to 
 perfect health ; and lived, either to settle permanently in the 
 island, or to return to the homes they expected to have quitted 
 for ever. Nor were the Bermudas less renowned for the gener- 
 ous kindness and boundless hospitality of their native inhabi- 
 tants, than for the romantic loveliness of their scenery. No 
 
ANDREW MARVEL. 35 
 
 consumptive ever landed upon their shores in quest of health 
 — no tourist ever came to explore their beauties — no wayfar- 
 ing mariner was ever stranded upon their rocks, who met not 
 here a friend, and found not here a home. The only rivalry 
 that existed was, — who should show most kindness to the 
 stranger.* 
 
 But lovely and fertile as these fairy islands were, and still 
 more attractive the native character of their inhabitants, the 
 early history of the Bermudas does not appear to furnish any 
 clear or authentic evidence that evangelical religion had ever 
 very extensively prevailed. And yet, if we may credit An- 
 drew Marvel, of the Commonweath — one of the greatest wits 
 and statesmen of his age, and a Christian poet, too, of no mean 
 worth — it would seem that the Bermuda islands afforded an 
 asylum to some of the Puritans from the tyranny which drove 
 so many to seek in other lands the liberty of conscience denied 
 them in their own.f But, if this be true, the piety which 
 
 * "Waller, in his " Summer Islands," a poem of exquisite beauty, thus 
 portrays this salubrious clime : — 
 
 " For the kind spring (which but salutes us here) 
 Inhabits these, and courts them all the year ; 
 Ripe fruits and blossoms on the same trees live, 
 At once they promise, and at once they give. 
 So sweet the air, so moderate the clime, 
 None sickly lives, or dies before his time. 
 Heaven sure has kept this spot of earth uncursed, 
 To show how all things were created first." 
 
 t This historical fact is embodied iu the following poem, entitled 
 "Bermudas," composed by Andrew Marvel, and pubhshed about the 
 year 1661, It is supposed to be a chant of the Puritans who fled to 
 these islands: — 
 
 " Where the remote Bermudas ride 
 
 In the ocean's bosom, unespied, 
 
 Prom a small boat that rowed along, 
 
 The list'ning winds received this song : 
 " • What should we do but sing His praise, 
 
 That led us through the wat'ry maze, 
 
 Unto an isle so long unknown, 
 
 And yet far kinder than our own ? 
 
 Where He the huge sea-monsters wracks, 
 
 'J hat lift the deep upon their backs. 
 
 He lands us on a grassy stage, 
 
 Safe from the storm's and prelates' rage ; 
 
 He gave us this eternal spring, 
 
 Which here enamels everything ; 
 
36 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 these holy refugees enkindled, in course of time, either expired 
 altogether, or lived only in the smouldering embers which 
 faintly glowed beneath the cold, deadening forms of a preva- 
 lent but lifeless religion. Yet God had purposes of mercy 
 towards these islands, which He was about now to unfold. 
 It was on the 15th of March, 1748, that the Rev. George 
 
 And sends the fowls to us in care, 
 On daily visits through the air ; 
 He hangs in shades the orange bright, 
 Like golden lamps in a green night ; 
 And does in the pomegranate close 
 Jewels more rich tlian Ormus shows. 
 He makes the figs our mouths to meet, 
 And throws the melons at our feet : 
 But apple plants of such a price, 
 No tree could ever bear them twice. 
 "With cedars, chosen by His hand, 
 From Lebanon, he stores the land, 
 And makes the hollow seas that roar, 
 Proclaim the ambergrease on shore. 
 He cast (of which we rather boast) 
 The gospel's pearl upon this coast, 
 And in their rocks for us did frame 
 A temple where to sound His name. 
 Oh ! let our voice His praise exalt, 
 Till it arise at heaven's vault, 
 "Which, then (perhaps) rebounding, may 
 Echo beyond the Mexique Bay.' 
 
 " Thus sang they in the English boat, 
 An holy and a cheerful note ; 
 And all the way, to guide their chime, 
 With falhng oars they kept the time." 
 
 Works of Andrew Marvel, by Captain Edmund Thompson, 
 3 vols. 1776. 
 
 There is, perhaps, no man whose name deserves to be held in more 
 sacred veneration, by those to whom the memory of the Puritans is dear, 
 than Andrew Marvel. He occupied an illustrious niche in the history 
 of his times. His father was a clergyman of great learning and of high 
 repute. He met an affecting and untimely death. Crossing a river with 
 a bridal party, for whom he was about to officiate, a sudden squall arose, 
 and the entire group, including the young and beautiful bride, perished. 
 The son, Andrew, who appeared to inherit much of his father's gifts, 
 was educated at Cambridge, and afterwards represented Forkington- 
 upon-HuU in Parliament, was secretary to the English Embassy at Con- 
 stantinople, and Assistant Latin Secretary to Milton, under Cromwell. 
 To him the blind bard was indebted for the early popularity oi" his sub- 
 lime poem. Finding " Paradise Lost," the copyright of wliich Milton 
 
WHITFIELD — HIS VISIT TO BERMUDA. 37 
 
 Whitfield, the great apostle of his age, landed in Bermuda. 
 He had arrived from New York, with impaired health, borne 
 down with anxiety and toil, seeking amidst the loveliness and 
 tranquillity of these enchanting isles a few weeks' bodily and 
 mental rest from his exhausting labours. An entire stranger, 
 ill, and depressed, his reception was worthy of the people, 
 and soothing to his lone feelings ; it was kind, sympathizing, 
 and hospitable. Whitfield was pleased with the beauties of 
 the place, and charmed with the simplicity and friendship of 
 the inhabitants. A rapid survey of the spiritual condition of 
 the population was sufficient to convince this zealous minister 
 of Christ that an extended field of evangelical labour, white 
 to the harvest, Avas spread out before him. Enfeebled by ill- 
 ness, and oppressed by care, though he was, his mighty soul 
 was stirred within him, and he yearned to proclaim throughout 
 that lovely group the unsearchable riches of Christ. Scarcely 
 allowing himself a week's repose, he commenced his mission. 
 The pulpits of the parish churches being closed against him 
 by a law of the island, which recpired a license from home, 
 and which the Governor would fain have relaxed in his favour, 
 he preached to large, attentive, and affected auditors in the 
 Presbyterian pulpit, in the Town-house of St. George's, in 
 private dwellings, and in the open air. The immediate result 
 was what might have been anticipated from the ministry of 
 Whitfield. Everywhere from the highest to the lowest, — from 
 the Executive to the most ignorant slave in the island, — society 
 was moved to its centre, as by one mighty impulse, on the 
 subject of religion. A general and powerful awakening 
 transpired. Crowds were attracted to his ministry — his word 
 was with power — and multitudes were profoundly impressed, 
 and not a few hopefully converted. Such an outpouring of 
 God's Spirit, such a revival of evangelical religion, those 
 
 had just sold for fifteen pounds, remained unhonoured and unknown, Mar- 
 vel wrote a complimentary poem on its publication, which at once un- 
 veiled its beauties to the undiscerning eye of the public, and brought it 
 into notice. He was a man of great integrity of principle, and of extra- 
 ordinary moral courage. Of him it was said hy an historian of his day, 
 " He had the courage to attack arbitrary government in the reign of a 
 tyrant, and to attempt to defend the Protestant church when the head 
 of it died a Papist." Some poc-t thus refers to two of the greatest men 
 of his day: 
 
 " 'Tis Marvel braves the wicked acts of kings ; 
 But what the Muses dictate — Milton sings." 
 
38 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 islands had, perhaps, never before witnessed. Amongst the 
 first to welcome Mr. Whitfield to Bermuda, and to offer the 
 hospitality of his house, was Dr. George Forbes, the grand- 
 father of the subject of this memoir. He received the inter- 
 esting stranger to his home, paid him the most courteous 
 attention, and employed his influence in obtaining the Council 
 Chamber for his use, in which the Governor, several of the 
 council, the clergymen of the parish, and a number of the 
 townspeople assembled in the most devout order to hear the 
 message of salvation from his lips. The reader will gather a 
 better idea of the remarkable success of Mr. Whitfield's labours 
 in Bermuda, during which he preached generally twice a day 
 for a month, from the extracts given below, selected from his 
 own private journal.* 
 
 * " Wednesday, April 6. After sermon Dr. Forbes and Mr. P , 
 
 the Collector, desired me to favour them and the gentlemen of the town 
 with my company to dine with them. I accepted the invitation. The 
 Governor, the President, and Judge Bascombe were there. All won- 
 dered at my speaking so freely and fluently witliout notes. At table 
 liis Excellency introduced somethhig of religion, by asking me the mean- 
 uig of the word • hades.' Several other things were started about free 
 will, Adam's fall, predestination, &c., to all which God enabled me to 
 answer so pertinently, and taught me to mix the utile and dulce so to- 
 gether, that all at table seemed highly pleased, shook me by the hand, 
 and invited me to their respective houses. The Governor, in particular, 
 asked me to dine with him on the morrow ; and Dr. Forbes, one of his 
 particular intimates, invited me to drink tea in the afternoon. I thanked 
 all, returned proper respects, and went to my lodgings with some degree 
 of thankfulness for the assistance afforded me, but awed before God at 
 the consideration of my unspeakable unvvorthiness. In the afternoon, 
 about five o'clock, I expounded the parable of the prodigal son to 
 many people at a private house, and in the evening had liberty to speak 
 freely and closely to those that supped with me. Oh, that this may be 
 the beginning of good gospel times to the inhabitants of this town ! 
 Lord, teach me to deal prudently with them, and cause them to melt 
 under Thy word. 
 
 " Sunday, 17. God still magnifies His power and goodness more and 
 more. This morning we had a plea.siug sight in Mr. Paul's meeting- 
 house. T began to preach, and tlie people to be affected as in days of 
 old at home. Indeed, the prospect is encouraging. ' Praise the Lord, 
 my soul.' 
 
 " May 7. In my conversation, these two days, with some of my 
 friends, I was diverted much in hearing several things that passed among 
 the poor negroes since my preaching to them last Sunday. 
 
 " One of the number, it seems, said, ' that if the book I preached out 
 of was the best book that was ever bought, and came out of London, she 
 was sure it had never all that in it which I spoke to the negroes.' Tho 
 
WHITFIELD — HIS SUCCESSFUL LABOURS. 39 
 
 "Laden with abundance of prayers and blessings," to use 
 his own words, Whitfield bade farewell to Bermuda and its 
 generous inhabitants, bearing with him, as the expression of 
 their grateful love, ample provisions for his voyage, and up- 
 old man who spoke out last Sunday and said, ' Yes, Sir,' when I asked 
 them whether all the negroes would not go to heaven, being questioned 
 by somebody why he spoke out so. answered, ' that the gentleman put 
 the question once or twice to them, and the other fools had not the man- 
 ners to make me any answer, till at last I seemed to point at him, and 
 he was ashamed that nobody should answer me, and therefore he did.' 
 Another, wondering why I said negroes had black hearts, was answered 
 by his black brother thus ; ' Ah ! thou fool dost not thou understand it ? 
 he means black with sin.' From all which I infer that the Bermuda 
 negroes are more knowing than I supposed; that their consciences are 
 awake, and consequently prepared, in a good measure, for hearing the 
 gospel preached unto them. 
 
 " Sundaj^ May 15. ' Praise the Lord. my soul, and all that is 
 within me praise His holy name!' This morning I preaclied my fare- 
 well sermon at Mr. Paul's meeting-house ; it was quite full, and as the 
 President said, above a hundred and fifty whites, besides blacks, were 
 round the house. Attention sat on every face ; and when I came to 
 take my leave, oh, what a sweet unaffected weeping was there to be 
 seen everywhere. I believe there were few dry eyes. The negroes, 
 likewise, without doors, I heard, wept ])lentifully. My own heart was 
 affected, and though I have parted from friends so often, yet I find every 
 fresh parting almost unmans me, and very much affects my heart ! Sure- 
 ly a great work is begun in some souls at Bermuda ! Carry it on. O 
 Lord, and if it be thy will, send me to those dear people again. Even 
 so, Lord Jesus. Amen. 
 
 "Sunday, May 22. Blessed be God! the little leaven thrown into 
 the three measures of meal begins to ferment, and work almost every 
 day for the week past. I have conversed with souls loaded with a sense 
 of their sins, and as far as I can judge, really pricked to tlieir heart. I 
 preached only three times, but to almost three larger auditories than 
 usual. Indeed the fields are wliite, ready unto harvest. God has been 
 pleased to bless private visits. Go where I will, upon the least notice, 
 bouses are crowded, and the poor souls that Ibllow are soon drenched 
 in tears. This day I took, as it were, another farewell. As the ship 
 did not sail, I preached at Somerset in the morning, to a large congre- 
 gation in the fields, and expounded in the evening to as large a one at 
 Mr. Harvey's house, round which stood many hundreds of people. But 
 in the morning and evening how did the poor souls weep! The Lord 
 seemed to be with me in a peculiar manner. After the service, when I 
 lay down on the bed to rest, many came weeping bitterly round me, and 
 took their last farewell. Though my body was very weak, yet my .soul 
 was full of comfort. I magnified the Lord, and my spirit rejoiced in God 
 my Saviour. Abundance of prayers and blessings were put up for my 
 safe passage to England, and speedy return to Bermuda again. May 
 they enter into the ears of the Lord of SabaothI" — Whitfield's Joiinal. 
 
40 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 wards of one liunclred pounds for his Orphan House, the spon- 
 taneous contributions of several parishes where he had preached 
 the word. The traces of his labours existed for many years 
 afterwards ; and although, in process of time, this powerful re- 
 vival was succeeded by a sad relapse into religious formalism, 
 both in the pulpit and amongst the people, yet the seed then 
 sown by this prince of preachers still bore fruit. Amongst the 
 converts of his ministry appears to have been an aunt of Mrs. 
 Winslow, a family tradition of whom still existed, that her 
 favourite and frequent exclamation was, " Oh, for more grace ! " 
 Alas ! that a declension so melancholy should have followed a 
 spiritual awakening so gracious. But God had not left Him- 
 self without a witness. There still existed a little remnant 
 who preserved the coal unquenched. The occasional visit of 
 a gospel minister in quest of health, or in the providence of 
 God, driven upon the island by stress of weather, helped to 
 keep alive the smouldering embers of vital religion. This 
 feeble band, who may be regarded as the conservators of evan- 
 gelical piety in Bermuda, were wont to assemble statedly for 
 public worship, one of their number generally reading a dis- 
 course from '' Burder's Village Sermons." It was to meet this 
 spiritual destitution that the thoughts of Mrs. Winslow, as ex- 
 pressed in the following letters to her mother, were directed : — 
 "August, 1813. I am trying very hard to send you a 
 dear gospel minister to be settled in St. George's ; and I do 
 earnestly entreat that you all will endeavour, if I succeed in 
 obtaining one, to procure him a place to preach in until he is 
 enabled to build a chapel. The Lord has blessed me, and I 
 think I am called in duty to lay out what He has given me 
 for His glorj', I think I can spare fifty pounds a year to aid 
 the minister until he is sufficiently established, and draws 
 around him a cons-rea-ation who will be able to afford him a 
 proper mamtenance. I have employed several dear minis- 
 ters to inquire for one who may be made a blessing to you all. 
 Now, I wish to hear from you, just to know whether you can 
 obtain a place for him to preach in, and whether you can raise 
 a subscription to pay its expenses until I am enabled to build 
 a chapel ; for I mean to build one myself, in God's good time ; 
 and I trust some of my own children will stand up in it, preach- 
 ing, from heartfelt experience, the unsearchable riches of 
 Christ, when you and I, my precious mother, will be admiring 
 and adoring the same Jesus in eternity. All things are pos- 
 
EFFORTS TO OBTAIN A MINISTER FOR BERMUDA. 41 
 
 sible with our God ; and great are my expectations from Him. 
 He has put large desires in my heart, and has promised in His 
 own word to fulfil them. You must give me a part of the 
 garden, if you think proper; or, if that cannot be, I must 
 purchase a piece of ground in the town. A chapel must be 
 built where my God will be glorified and souls won to Christ. 
 Oh, that you knew how He blesses my soul, and how much 
 He reveals His tender love to me, so that there are moments 
 when I am hfted above the world and feel next door to heaven ! 
 
 "My dear Mother, — I cannot express to you, though I 
 hope you feel it also, the comfort and consolation I derive 
 from seeing my eternal interest in Christ and in the love of 
 God as my Covenant Father. How great, how unspeakably 
 great are our privileges, and how glorious the prospect we 
 have before us ! Jesus will never leave nor forsake those 
 who put their trust in Him. I have been praying much for 
 you all lately, with respect to your spiritual welfare, that the 
 Lord would fill your hearts with peace and joy in believing, 
 and lift you above this poor, fleeting, perishing world. I am 
 doing my utmost to get you a minister, but none are willing 
 to leave their native land." At a later date she adds : — 
 
 " I am doing my best to procure a minister to send to you, 
 but I find it more "difficult than I expected, as those who are 
 good prefer remaining at home, and I will not send you an 
 indifferent one. However, let us trust the Lord, and in His 
 own good time He will provide one." 
 
 The following note, addressed to Mrs. Winslow, from the 
 late excellent and venerable Rev. George Burder, author of 
 the " Village Sermons," just alluded to, manifests the interest 
 he felt in this missionary effort. 
 
 "My Dear Friend,— "London, May, 18U. 
 
 " I have not been unmindful of Bermuda. I men- 
 tioned it at a meeting where many ministers were present, and 
 begged to be informed if they could hear of any. There is 
 no person so hkely to speak to as Mr. Thomas Wilson, of 
 Islington. But, indeed, all the academies are jealous of trans- 
 ferring their students from their original destination, being sup- 
 ported by the public. I will still make inquiry, and hope, sooner 
 or later, we shall succeed. I will call upon you if I can, but 
 my hands are more than full — I cannot do half my business. 
 " I am, Madam, yours in the Lord, George Border." 
 
42 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 From among a large number of candidates who had pre 
 sented themselves, one at length was deemed suitable for the 
 appointment, and was accepted. The Rev. H. H. Cross and 
 his wife embarked on this interesting mission, and arrived safe 
 at Bermuda, amid the cordial and afiectionate greetings of the 
 little Christian band of whom he was to assume the pastoral 
 oversight. The chapel was completed, and dedicated to the 
 worship of God, in connexion with a remarkable and thrilling 
 incident, strikingly illustrative of His gracious and all-govern- 
 ing Providence. The interesting narrative to which we refer, 
 will be found below, in a letter from the Rev. Mr. Cross, ad- 
 dressed to the Rev. John Arundel, of the London Missionary 
 Society.* 
 
 * ''St. George's, Bermuda. June 20, 1821. 
 
 " I am liapp}' to inform you, my dear brother, that our chapel was 
 opened on the ] 3th of April, under peculiar circumstances of gratitude 
 and delight towards Him who conducts all things after the counsel of His 
 own will. 
 
 " Previous to its opening, my mind was a great deal exercised respect- 
 ing the service of that important day. I had no brother to whom I 
 could say, ' Come and help me:' I stood alone; and my feelings often 
 overwhelmed me. My fears, however, were very singularly dispersed 
 by our kind and ever gracious God. On Saturday, previous to the 13th, 
 a ship appeared in sight otf the island, hoisting signals of distress : and 
 a report was soon circulated, ' that she was full of passengers and seve- 
 ral Methodist parsons, in a state of starvation ; six months from Liver- 
 pool, bound for New York.' I immediately thought on Mr. AA^ard ; and 
 by referring to the Magazine, found that the time of his sailing from 
 Liverpool to the United States exactly corresponded. I went up the 
 signal hill, where all vessels are seen, and looked with an anxious eye 
 towards the ship, hoping and fearing that Mr. Ward might be on board. 
 On my return, however, I found from a friend who had just heard from 
 New York, that Mr. W. had been there, and was then about to return 
 to England. On Sabbath afternoon, the ship, with great difficulty, came 
 witliin anchorage off tlie island. Some of my friends went with pro- 
 visions on board, and found the passengers in great distress, yet filled 
 with consolation, and manj'- of them with 'joy and peace in believing.' 
 As the passengers were no strangers to the language of Canaan, my 
 friends were soon introduced to the Rev. Duncan Dunbar, a Baptist 
 minister, his wife and four children; Rev. Mr, Grey, a Presbyterian 
 minister, and his interesting wile (to us particularly so, because we soon 
 learnt that she had been brought to the saving knowledge of the truth 
 from the circumstances of the voyage) ; and Mr. AYest, a teacher, a very 
 pious young man, and son to Rev, Mr. West, of Dublin. They stated, 
 in brief, the distressing circumstance to my friends, who could not then 
 listen to their ' Tale of woe' before they came for some fresh supplies 
 (circumstances prevented the missionaries from landing on the Sabbath, 
 and my duties from seeing them that evening). It appeared they had 
 
CHAPEL OPENED IN ST. GEORGe's. 43 
 
 The subject of colonial slavery has happily ceased to rouse 
 those feehngs of horror and indignation, which at one time 
 stirred the Enghsh mind to its centre, by the universal and 
 
 been at sea nearly six months : for four months they had been on the 
 allowance of five potatoes per day, and for three weeks the Missionaries 
 had scarcely a drop of water in their mouths : such were the cries of 
 many children on board, that they were obliged to deny themselves 
 what they could only obtain from the clouds, to satisfy the thirst of the 
 little ones. They were, however, in good health ; and were constrained 
 to say, 'Though we have had nothing, we have possessed all things.' 
 
 "'J he Divine presence had evidently blessed the labours of these de- 
 voted servants of Jesus to the hopeful conversion of several. 
 
 " P]arly on Monda}- morning I went off with several of my friends to 
 the ship, and was soon in the midst of this interesting Mission family. I 
 found them perfectly happy, yea, rejoicing in the prospect of meeting 
 some Christian friends in a strange country. 
 
 " During their stay with us, we had our new chapel opened. Mr. 
 Dunbar preached in the morning, from Gen. xxviii. 17, and Mr. Grey in 
 the evening, from Zecli. xiv. IG. 17, to a very crowded and attentive 
 congregation. The collection amounted to eighty dollars. Our friends 
 remained with us nearly three weeks, and their circumstances and 
 labours made a deep impression on many. One evening after Mr. D. 
 had delivered an excellent and faithful sermon from Acts, vii. 34, the 
 Collector of the Customs went to one of my friends, and begged that 
 
 his name might be put down for doubloons, (£21 6s. 8d currene}^) 
 
 for the general catastrophe, which, he observed, has been so gratefully 
 remembered by the stranger this evening. In tlie morning we waited 
 on him to return our thank.s, and to say, that as the government liad 
 given orders that the passengers should all be taken care of, and for- 
 warded to New York hy the first vessel, we begged to decline his kind 
 otier. (-n stating, however, the great object of Mr. D.'s mission, and 
 showing him his case which was strongly recommended by most of the 
 ministers in Edinburgh, Glasgow and Liverpool, and particular!}' by a 
 written recommendation from Dr. Chalmers. < whom the Collector knows,) 
 he ver}' generously presented Mr. D. with the sum for the object of his 
 mission, adding, ' When you arrive at New Brunswick, show your case 
 to several gentlemen (whose names he gave Mr. D.) ; and give my re- 
 spects to them, and tell them to look at your book ; and say, I hope to 
 hear from you that they have followed my example. God bless you, 
 and give you success.' "\Ye obtained also, from other friends, subscrip- 
 tions to the amount of £40, besides clothing and necessaries for tlie 
 voyage. Every day rendered them more endearing to the friends of 
 Jesus in this place. Fain could we have said, ' Abide with us, for tliere 
 is room;' and glad would they have been to .sa}^, ' We will continue 
 with you ;' but the piercing cry of the red men of the wood.s, ' No 
 white man teach red man ' had penetrated their hearts. ' For these,' 
 said they, ' we have left all : and for these we must leave you.' Tiiej'" 
 left us on Good Friday, and we are daily expecting to hear of their 
 arrival." 
 
44- MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 entire extinction of the monstrous evil. In the Bermudas, as 
 in all the West-India Islands, slavery of course existed. By 
 a legislative law of the islands, however, the importation of 
 slaves was strictly prohibited. To this enactment, as also to 
 the benevolent feelings for which Bermudian society was pro- 
 verbial, may be attributed the mitigated and mild form Avhich 
 slavery in this colony assumed. 
 
 If in any place involuntary servitude appeared divested of 
 its more repulsive features, it was here. But prune and mod- 
 erate the evil as you may — lighten its yoke, and gild its 
 chain— lessen its toil, and call it by mild and gentle names, — 
 " Slavery, thou art a bitter draught ! " It is a system contrary 
 to all the tender instincts of our nature, is at war with the 
 genius of Christianity, and is opposed by every sentiment and 
 feeling of true religion and virtue. Familiar as Mrs. Winslow 
 was, from childhood, with this species of servitude, she yet 
 never was wholly reconciled to the monstrous principle of 
 holding property in man. On reaching her majority, she 
 found herself the owner of two domestic slaves ; but although 
 lapsing to her by inheritance, it will appear that she was ill at 
 ease in her possession ; in this sentiment she was strengthened 
 by the best feelings and efforts of her husband. An illustra- 
 tion of this may here be given : — A poor free negro man 
 hastened one day to Captain Winslow, in the greatest dis- 
 tress, and informed him that his wife and children, who were 
 slaves, were on the eve of being sold to another master, with 
 the prospect of their removal from the island, and in all proba- 
 bility their separation from him for ever. He came to request 
 his sympathy and aid in rescuing them from so distressing a 
 fate. His appeal met with a cordial and instantaneous re- 
 sponse. Not a moment was to be lost. Seizing his sword, 
 and adjusting it as he passed through the streets, accompanied 
 by the anxious negro. Captain Winslow hastened to the auction 
 mart. The sale had commenced. There stood the poor trem 
 bling woman and her children, for whom a large sum had 
 already been offered. Captain Winslow instantly became a 
 competitor. The contest grew warm. Observing his deter- 
 mination to purchase, the price rose to an enormous sum. At 
 this juncture, the terror-stricken father approached him, and 
 said, " Massa, do not bid any more ; I shall never be able 
 to repay you, Massa." '' Never mind, Ben," was the answer. 
 At length victory decided in his favour, and he bore away in 
 
MANUMITS HER SLAVES. 45 
 
 triumph the slave-wife, mother, and little ones, restoring them 
 FREE to the dehghted and grateful husband and parent. "I 
 shall never be able to repay jou, Massa," was the exclamation 
 of the poor negro. "No matter if you cannot," was all the 
 reply of one, Avhose heart had already fovmd its full reward in 
 the generous impulse it had cherished, and in the pure happi- 
 ness it had conferred. Mrs. Winslow's views on this subject 
 may be gathered from the following letter to her mother : — 
 
 " I wish, my dear mamma, to give my two negroes, Ben 
 and John, their freedom. I cannot bear the idea of having 
 slaves. But if you think it most for their good to keep them 
 in my service, I will have their freedom made out, so that at 
 my death they may not be liable to be sold or made slaves. I 
 sometimes think, that to give such a poor creature as John his 
 freedom now, (in other words to cast him off,) he would soon 
 go to ruin. But still I would desire so to manage things as to 
 make him free whenever he can maintain himself, and to secure 
 his freedom now in case I should be called home," 
 
 It is almost needless to add that her directions were im- 
 mediately and fully complied with. And yet it was one of 
 her bitterest self-accusations, as from the close of her pilgrimage 
 she looked upon its past, that she had ever been the involun- 
 tary possessor of a slave. It is true, they were inherited and 
 not j)urchased — were kindly treated, justly remunerated, and 
 ultimately freed ; yet, as the shadows of eternity deepened 
 around her, this solemn background of human life brought out 
 in bolder relief the circumstances and events of bygone years, 
 and she was known to weep and humble herself before God, 
 for her past participation in an evil which now appeared in a 
 light so sinful, and in a character so abhorrent. 
 
 The spiritual mind will sympathize with the exercises de 
 tailed in the following letter. 
 
 To her Mother. — " Oh that I could commit, with my soul, 
 all my temporal concerns into the hands of my covenant God, 
 and feel that He who has the hearts of all men at His com- 
 mand will give me all things, and do all things necessary for 
 me ! for Jesus will ' do all things well.' Pray, my precious 
 mother, that He would increase my faith, for I need it every 
 hour and every moment of the day. I often go to Him w^ith 
 the intention of casting all my cares upon Him, but as often 
 bring them away again. Oh, how far, how very far do I fall 
 short of what a true Christian ought to be ! I grieve and 
 
46 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 lament my shortcomings, and long to evince myself, by prac- 
 tice as well as by profession, a lowly follower of Jesus Christ ; 
 and He, I trust, with whom all things are possible, will enable 
 me to overcome and be more than conqueror. All my hope 
 is in Him, my eye is up to Him ; and He has promised that 
 he will in nowise cast out. Pray for me." 
 
 In the extract which follows, we trace the early workings 
 of that simple, yet strong faith — a faith all the stronger because 
 so childlike — for which her whole Christian life was so remark- 
 able. It records, too, one of those providential interpositions 
 which so frequently appear in her history. Her eldest son 
 had recently left her, on a visit to Bermuda, and she thus 
 writes to her mother : — 
 
 " I long to hear from my precious child, but still I am not 
 so uneasy about him as you and others would imagine ; for I 
 know who commands the winds and the waves, and I know 
 also who has said, If you ask anything in my 7iame, it shall be 
 granted you. So you see the Lord calls me to walk by faith, 
 and He gives me faith to trust Him, to His own praise and 
 glory. I awoke last night and discovered my room on fire — 
 three of my children were with me. I had prayed that the 
 Lord would watch over me and mine, and not forgetting you 
 
 and B , and keep us from danger. He heard my petition. 
 
 I awoke just in time to save myself and family from being 
 burnt. It was occasioned by a spark falling from the rushlight 
 upon the dressing-table, which set fire to the wainscot and 
 the table, which were burning when I awoke. I extinguished 
 the fire, opened the door to let the smoke escape — for both 
 rooms were filled — without alarming the family, and retired to 
 bed again to meditate on the goodness of God to such an un- 
 worthy creature. Has He not said that His angels encamp 
 round about His people ; and have I not reason to believe 
 Him and bless Him for all His mercies ? So you see, my be- 
 loved mother, that you have no occasion to be uneasy about 
 me, for I am in very precious hands. I only grieve that I 
 make no greater progress in the Divine life. But what a 
 mercy to be in the way to heaven ; and sure I am that He 
 who has put me in that way will keep me there until the time 
 comes to call me to partake of those blessings He has purchased 
 for me with the precious price of His own blood." 
 
 But a dark cloud was now gathering over her domestic hap- 
 piness. The remarkable grace we have seen developing itself 
 
ILLNESS OF HER HUSBAND. 47 
 
 in the infancy of her Christian hfe, was about to pass through 
 the crucible. The precious faith, so richly bestowed, was now 
 to be tried as by fire. And, perhaps, from this period of her 
 history may be dated the commencement of those disciplinary 
 dealings of her Heavenly Father, which gave such a decided 
 impress and complexion to her future life ; and to the salutary 
 influence of which may be attributed that completeness and 
 mellowness of Christian character, for which she afterwards 
 became so eminent. The affliction to Avhich we now refer, was 
 the renewed and alarming illness of her husband, the circum- 
 stances of which, and the exercises of her mind on the occa- 
 sion, she thus details ; — 
 
 " My dearest Mamma, — * London, Aug. 22, 1813. 
 
 " I know it will distress you to hear that my be- 
 loved husband is again laid on a bed of sickness, perhaps the 
 bed of death. He was getting better, and was looking as 
 well as ever he did ; but I thought the Lord would bring him 
 low to save his soul. The world and worldly people were 
 alluring him from all his good resolutions. On Tuesday even- 
 ing I took a short walk with him, and then left him in good 
 health, to go to the House of God. On my return, I Avas told 
 that he had retired. I had stopped to visit a dying saint, and 
 thus made it late before I returned. As soon as he heard me, 
 he called me from the head of the stairs, to come to him. I 
 found him pale and trembling, for just as he was stepping into 
 bed, he coughed and raised blood. I sent for the physician, 
 and endeavoured to tranquillize his mind. The doctor came, 
 but said it was so little he would not bleed him, and after tak- 
 ing something prescribed, he composed himself to sleep. The 
 next morning he appeared as well as usual, and came down 
 stairs. But about twelve o'clock the dreadful hcemorrhage 
 returned rapidly, I sent off for another physician, a Christian 
 man. They took nearly a quart of blood from his arm. The 
 ha3morrhage then abated for about an hour, when it returned 
 again, and continued off and on until five o'clock. My dear- 
 est mother, how you would have felt to have witnessed the 
 agony of his distressed mind. He said there was no hope for 
 him — that he had neglected the day of salvation, and the Lord 
 would have no mercy on his soul. He implored me to pray 
 for him continually. I did pray. I spoke to him of the love 
 of Jesus, and entreated him to call upon Him who had prom- 
 
48 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 ised that those who came to Him he would in nowise cast 
 out. He hung upon every word I said, and repeated, 'Oh, 
 that I had but taken your advice !' He could not speak much, 
 but I continued to repeat to him every precious promise as well 
 as I was able. He now lies between life and death. But 
 while there is life there is hope. The doctors have some hopes 
 to-night that he may recover. The sight of the children threw 
 him into great agitation. Two hours ago he exclaimed, 'Jesus, 
 
 blessed Jesus ! manifest Thyself to me I' It was the first 
 prayer I ever heard him utter ; and I doubt not but Jesus has 
 heard it, too. The physician spoke sweetly to him, and im- 
 plored him to continue to call upon the Lord until He answered 
 him. Mr. Stewart has also been with him, and endeavoured 
 to lead him to Jesus. We have just been at prayer by his 
 bed-side, and I am now writing close by him. 
 
 " This, my precious mother, has been, and is, a trying time 
 to me ; but the Lord, ever faithful to His promise, is with me, 
 and gives me strength according to my day. Fear not for 
 me ; God is my Father ; He watches over me, and will not 
 afflict me beyond what he will give me strength to bear ; and 
 
 1 trust, if it is the Lord's will. He will again restore him. I 
 have entreated him not to think of me or of his children, but 
 only to think of his own soul. I read and pray, and watch 
 over him, and am scarcely a moment from, his side. He says, 
 if he is but spared, how differently will he live. Oh, that 
 Jesus may hear my prayer, and cause his soul to rejoice. 
 
 '■'■Friday nighty 23. — My precious Winslow has had a good 
 night, and has continued so throughout the day. The bleed- 
 ing has not returned, but the physician says he is not out of 
 danger. He says nothing, for he is not allowed to speak ; but 
 I trust he thinks the more. We have just been at prayer by 
 his side. Good Mr. Baker engaged in prayer, and all the fam- 
 ily, as usual, attended. May the Lord in mercy hear our 
 prayers ! My spirits, which for two days and nights have 
 been wonderfully supported, to-night a little flagged, and a 
 trifling thing threw me into tears. I have everything to be 
 thankful for ; but my mind has been on the full stretch, and 
 weeping nov.^ is a relief. But I am, thank God, well, and 
 have no fear but for the salvation of my precious husband's 
 immortal soul. Oh, may he be led, in this affliction, to seek 
 Jesus with all his heart ! 
 
 " 24. — Thank God, he is better to-day. Oh, may this warn 
 
ILLNESS OF HER HUSBAND. 49 
 
 him to flee from the wrath to come ! but I am afraid it will not 
 suflQce. His distress is not occasioned, I fear, by sin committed 
 against a holy, good, and righteous God, but from a fear of 
 death. However, the Lord knows best how to work upon the 
 sinner's heart, and I trust He will save his soul. 
 
 " Saturday afternoon. — The physician has seen Winslow, 
 and says he thinks he will do well. He implored him to pray 
 to the Physician of souls, who knew his heart, and could read 
 
 there his desires. I am rejoiced you have Miss M with 
 
 you : I doubt not, from what Mr. S. tells me, she is a child of 
 God, and knows what it is to be born again. May she prove 
 a real blessing to you. Tell her I love her, because she be- 
 longs to the fold of Jesus, and for her attachment to you. 
 May the Lord, whom we serve, strengthen your heart to 
 persevere in the blessed cause, and to show to all about you 
 what great things he has wrought in your soul ! Broad is 
 the road to destruction, and many go therein ; narrow is the 
 road that leads to glory, and there are few, comparatively, who 
 find it — happy few ! And, oh, what a mercy that he has 
 guided our feet there ! Our souls and bodies ought to be de- 
 voted to Him, to glorify Him for His distinguishing grace ; 
 for what are we more than others, that He should fix His 
 everlasting love upon us while we were dead in trespasses and 
 in sins ? But He will have mercy upon whom He will have 
 mercy. Blessed, for ever blessed, be His adored name. Oh, 
 for grace to serve Him better, and to love Him more ! We 
 love Him^ because He first loved its. Our love is the effect, and 
 not the cause, of His love to us. 
 
 " Sept. 3. — I know it will please you to have a line, especially 
 as I can tell you my dearest Winslow is mending as fast as I 
 could wish. May grace be as thriving in his soul as health is 
 in his body ! I am strong, and in good spirits ; for my Friend 
 above reigneth, and He has enabled me to cast every weight 
 of care upon Him. I have everything to praise Him for ; for 
 
 goodness and loving-kindness follow me all my days. Mrs. 
 
 said to me the other day, " What a blessing it is, situated as 
 you are, that you are religious ! ' She might have said, 'What 
 a blessing it is that God is your Friend ! ' Oh, the sweets of 
 religion 1 To know the Lord Jesus is our Friend, surpasses 
 every earthly good, and is better than the possession of a thou- 
 sand worlds. To have Him to go to, — to lay before Him all 
 our wants, to express our fears, to plead his promises, and to 
 3 
 
50 MEMOIR OF MKS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 expect that because He has promised He will fulfil, — is worth 
 more than all the world can give. His ear is ever open to the 
 prayer of his people, and, 
 
 * Though hell and death obstruct the way, 
 The weakest saint shall win the day.' 
 
 "My precious husband begins to understand and to love the 
 truth. He who has begun a good work, will complete it in 
 him. He loves and admires Mr. Sheppard, our worthy clergy- 
 man, who regularly visits us once a fortnight ; and although 
 Winslow does not say much, he listens with the profoundest 
 attention to everything of a serious nature when we have any 
 religious friends with us." 
 
 Thus, the dark cloud, enshrouding her domestic happiness, 
 and which for a while wore an aspect so threatening, was in a 
 measure removed. The pious physician, to whom allusion is 
 made in the preceding extracts, merits a passing notice. The 
 gentleman referred to, was the late Dr. James Hamilton, a 
 name as sacred to religion as it w^as dear to science. The pe- 
 culiar and salutary influence of the Christian physician was, 
 perhaps, never more strikingly illustrated than in the case of 
 Dr. Hamilton. Everywhere, and on all occasions, he was the 
 man of God ; but nowhere did his Christianity shine with so 
 rich a lustre as by the side of the sick bed. On one occasion, 
 when allusion was made to the happy results of a prescription, 
 with lowliness he remarked, that he "never prescribed a rem- 
 edy imaccompanied with a prayer for the Divine blessing upon 
 its use." It was frequently his habit, extensive as was his 
 practice, to spend five minutes in prayer, before retiring from 
 the sick room, thus leaving upon the mind of his patient a 
 most soothing, healthful influence.* What an incalculable 
 blessing may such an individual be ! The Christian physician 
 
 * A marble tablet, erected to his memory in the City Road Chapel, 
 thus truthfully records his many Christian virtues : "His religion was 
 exhibited in his medical profession, in his family, in his general inter- 
 course with societ}', in the sweetness and amiability of his temper, in 
 the habitual composure and happiness of his life, and pre-eminentl}' in 
 his Catholic spirit, which led him to love all who feared God, without 
 any distinction of sect or party. He ascribed his eminent success in his 
 professional efforts to the power of God in answer to prayer: and he 
 hved and died with the abiding conviction of his own unworthiness as a 
 sinner, and of the sufficiency of a Saviour's righteousness, at the good 
 old age of eighty-six." 
 
INFLUENCE OP CHRISTIAN PHYSICIANS. 51 
 
 is begirt with opportunities of usefulness, to which the gospel 
 minister can scarcely aspire. The clergyman is, in most in- 
 stances, the last attendant of a sick room thought of, the last 
 summoned, and often when too late to be of any essential 
 avail — the patient, perhaps, worn by fever, racked with agony, 
 or stupified by anodynes. But the Christian physician is the 
 constant attendant ; he possesses the ear, the confidence, and 
 the grateful regard of the sick person. "Without awaking a 
 needless suspicion of danger, and thereby producing undue ex- 
 citement, he can direct the languid eye to the good and great 
 Ph3'sician of tlie soul, and tell of His blood, the only remedy 
 for the mind's malady. Thus, like his divine Master, whom 
 of all others he most closely resembles, he may travel from 
 ward to ward in this vast hospital, " healing all manner of 
 diseases, and preaching the gospel of the kingdom." Who, as 
 he accompanies Dr. Hamilton to the bedside of the sinking 
 and alarmed patient, and marks his affectionate fidelity and 
 Christian concern for the higher interests of the soul, feels not 
 a desire that a vocation so ennobled as a science, and so purely 
 benevolent as a profession, might be universally sanctified and 
 consecrated by religion ? 
 
 Mrs. Winslow's ecclesiastical views at this period may be 
 gathered from the following letter to her mother : — 
 
 " We are going on as usual, so that there is nothing impor- 
 tant to tell you. My rehgious pursuits are my greatest delight; 
 and I can truly say, religion's ways are to me ways of pleas- 
 antness, and all its paths are peace. I had a long conversation 
 
 with Mr. the other day on this subject ; but as I am not 
 
 a member of his communion, and dishke much I see in it, and 
 as he is very bigoted to his own views, we, of course, cannot 
 in many things agree. But, lest you should wonder wherein 
 we differ, it will be necessary to say it is only on church gov- 
 ernment and ordinances ; and as he sees not with the Church 
 of England, while I remain in it, he thinks I act wrong. But as 
 I see so many errors in his, I will remain where I am until I 
 find a purer and more perfect branch of Christ's church. I hear 
 the gospel in its greatest purity and excellence, and next to 
 communion with God, it is my greatest comfort and joy to 
 wait upon the preaching of the word. Hardly any weather 
 keeps me at home.'' 
 
 Warmly attached, however, as she was to the Established 
 Church, to which she then belonged, her soul, panting for the 
 
52 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 living water, could slake its thirst at any channel through 
 which it flowed. She delighted, therefore, to attend the 
 weekly ministration of ministers of Christ, other than those of 
 her own church ; and regularly once a-week she walked a mile 
 to Islington Chapel, where her soul was often refreshed by its 
 services. The eminent provincial ministers, who at this period 
 supplied in rotation the pulpits of Tottenham <Jourt Road 
 Chapel, and the Tabernacle, Moorfields, frequently allured her 
 to these " wells of salvation," from which, in seasons of trial 
 and spiritual dejection, she often returned invigorated and 
 comforted. She manifested, at this stage of her Christian 
 course, a deep interest in the spread of the gospel through all 
 lands; and thus refers, in a letter to her mother, to the re- 
 ligious anniversaries then transpiring : — 
 
 "I am just going into the City, to attend the Missionary 
 Meeting, and will write to you on my return. Evening. — I 
 did not return from the meeting until five o'clock, and then 
 only had time to take a cup of coffee, and hurry off to the 
 evening service. I have indeed been animated to-day, at see- 
 ing so many of God's dear people exerting their powers to the 
 
 utmost for the spread of the everlasting gospel. T and I 
 
 set out, as soon as I arranged my family matters for the day, 
 and we were fortunately at the London Tavern in time to 
 obtain sittings ; for many ladies stood the whole service. The 
 speaking lasted from two o'clock until five. All was anima- 
 tion and zeal. My favourite, Mr. Wilberforce, was most ex- 
 cellent. The eloquence of the orator, the elegance of the 
 gentleman, and the piety of the Christian, were all blended in 
 him, and in all he said. The crowd was very great, and the 
 applause at the different speeches so loud and so long that my 
 head ached while my heart rejoiced. Lord Gambler was in 
 the chair, and what little he said showed that his heart and 
 soul were devoted to Jesus. I never saw such an assemblage 
 of gospel ministers in one place before, and such a number of 
 ladies, whose countenances beamed with delight, and whose 
 tears bespoke their love to the cause of Christ. This is a 
 busy w^eek for the church militant. Missionary meetings and 
 sermons in all directions, and by the Church of England, Inde- 
 pendents, and Baptists ; for here they all sweetly unite in send- 
 ing the blessed gospel to the poor heathen. Besides this, there 
 is a society formed for instructing the Jews, and bringing God's 
 ancient people (or rather using the moans, with His blessing, 
 
HER YOUNG FAMILY. §3 
 
 for bringing them) to bow their knee to our Immanuel. This 
 meeting also takes place this week, and I am invited, as a 
 member of the society, to attend, at which I shall, please 
 God, have the happiness of seeing many Jews baptized in the 
 name of Jesus, How I shall rejoice, when it pleases God to 
 bring you to us, to go with you to such places; for I know it 
 will gladden your heart. May the Captain of our salvation 
 keep us steady and persevering ! And when I see the many 
 temptations all around me, and feel my own weakness, I in- 
 deed work out my own salvation with fear and trembling. 
 "What a glorious animating prospect we have before us ! A 
 crown of glory — an inheritance incorruptible., undefiled^ and 
 thatfadeth not away; and this is reserved in heaven for God's 
 people, and they are kept for it by the mighty power of God. 
 Fear 7iot, little flock, says Jesus ; it is your Father's good pleas- 
 ure to give yon the kingdom. Good-night." 
 
 The following familiar letter is introduced as being the only 
 one in the volume which affords anything like a particular ref- 
 erence to her young family ; thus supplying a link in the nar- 
 rative, which, perhaps, would otherwise be missed : — 
 
 " My dearest Mother, — Twickenham Common. 
 
 " Yours was forwarded to me at this |)lace, where 
 
 I am for a week, with my dear little suffering , in the 
 
 hope, with God's blessing, the change of air may be of service. 
 The Lord only knows whether I shall ever rear him. The 
 physician in town pronounces him in a decline, but that the 
 change of air may be of service. He is very dear and pre- 
 cious to me ; but I desire to resign him into His hand, who is 
 able to rescue him even from the grave ; and if it be His 
 blessed will to take him, I have a humble hope that He will 
 give me grace to say. Thy will he done! But oh, my dear 
 mother, you know my heart is wrapped up in my children ; 
 and this sweet little sufferer is particularly dear to me, because 
 he has been almost all his life afflicted ; and I beheve, if every 
 hair of his head were numbered, I have had a tear, a sigh, a 
 groan for each one. I am often afraid the Lord is chastening 
 me for my too anxious concern about my children. But I 
 know that all He does will eventually be for my good and His 
 glory. 
 
 " I have a little cottage on Twickenham Common for a 
 month, where the air is fine, and all the other children seem 
 
54 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 much benefited by it. I have with me the five younger chil- 
 dren. I and E , with a young friend of theirs, come 
 
 down to me on Saturday, as they then break up for the Mid- 
 summer. Dear httle F is one of the loveUest boys, per- 
 haps, you ever saw. R grows a fine fellow, and often 
 
 talks of you and his little wife. He is a good-looking boy, 
 
 nearly as tall as G , who is as wild as possible, and as lazy 
 
 as T . I received a letter from him yesterday, at Cadiz, 
 
 but there is no prospect at present of his coming home.*. . . . 
 God is my Shepherd, and all my concerns are in His hands. 
 Blessed, forever blessed, be His dear and holy name, who has 
 looked with everlasting mercy on such a poor, vile sinner as 
 me, and encouraged me with such sweet manifestations of His 
 love, to trust my soul and all my interests in His hands ; and 
 
 if God is for me, who can prevail against me ? If J\Irs. 
 
 comes home, I will endeavour to see her for your sake ; but I 
 rather decline much intercourse with worldly people ; for if 
 one can do them no good, they are sure to do you some harm. 
 May the Lord bless you in your soul, and enable you to follow 
 after the one thing needful, and induce you to make that the 
 chief concern of your life ! Religion is a personal thing ; we 
 must not leave our salvation to an uncertainty, and merely con- 
 sider Jesus as the Saviour of sinners ; but we are to know 
 that He is our Saviour ; and the Scriptures encourage us to 
 press forward until we do ascertain this ; and God has never 
 promised what he does not mean to perform. The ever-blessed 
 Jesus has encouraged us to ask and implore, and we must take 
 no denial, but, like the importunate widow, never rest until 
 He blesses us, and assures us by the witness of the Spirit, that 
 He is ours, and that we are His blood-bought children. May 
 He give His blessing to these imperfect words, is the earnest 
 prayer, my dearest mamma, of your affectionate daughter." 
 
 * Her eldest son, then a midsbipmau in the Royal Navy. 
 
CHAPTEK IV. 
 
 Probably, in no part of Grod's dealings with His people is 
 the perfection of His work more apparent — His wisdom, love, 
 and power more clearly seen — than in fitting them for the 
 exact niche in life He had pre-ordained them to fill. And it is 
 no shght mercy for the Christian to have a clear, unmistak- 
 able perception of the Lord's mind concerning this matter; 
 and then, be his mission lowly or exalted, his post of duty one 
 of honour or humiliation, to have grace vouchsafed cheerfully 
 to acquiesce, and promptly to obey. Thus had God remark- 
 ably fitted the subject of our Memoir for the position in life in 
 which she was now, and for so many years, in sad and lonely 
 widowhood, to glorify Him. The path she was henceforth to 
 tread, demanded a character of no ordinary energy, fortitude, 
 and strength ; but more than this — and apart from which the 
 miglitiest powers of nature must have succumbed — a large 
 degree of the Saviour's grace, so freely promised, and so 
 richly bestowed upon all who humbly seek it. But, great as 
 was the occasion which now summoned into action the best 
 powers of her mind, by the help of Him who perfects His 
 strength in human weakness, she proved herself equal to the 
 emergency. And we will glorify God in her. 
 
 The retirement of Captain Winslow from the army has 
 already been mentioned. The circumstances which led to this 
 step it may be interesting to the reader more minutely to 
 relate. It was at a critical period of her hfe — when danger- 
 ously ill in Ireland — that the 47th Regiment was under orders 
 to embark for India. The troops had left Cork for Ports- 
 mouth, and were prepared to sail at a moment's notice ; the 
 wind was unfavourable, and the transports were detained. It 
 was a moment of intense anxiety to Captain Winslow. Un- 
 willing to leave his wife under such circumstances, and with 
 no prospect of hearing from her for many months to come, he 
 resolved, without a moment's hesitation, to retire. Permission 
 
 (55) 
 
56 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 to sell was asked from the Duke of York — the Commander-in- 
 Chief Mrs. Winslow's illness increased — the Duke hesitated 
 — a slight variation of the wind would decide the question. 
 The suspense was agonizing. At length the Colonel of the 
 regiment handed him a letter from head-quarters, containing 
 the Duke's consent. In less than an hour afterwards the wind 
 veered, and the transports sailed ; and Captain Winslow re- 
 linquished a commission in the army he had held from early life, 
 with equal honour to himself and fidelity to his sovereign. 
 Tlius, often do the most signal events of our history — those 
 upon which all the future turns as on a pivot — transpire as in 
 a moment, and by a power manifestly beyond ourselves. This 
 were a phenomenon utterly inexplicable, but for the doctrine 
 of a particular Providence, guiding and shaping the minutest 
 as the most important events of our life. Nothing could have 
 been further from his thoughts than the position in which Cap- 
 tain Winslow now suddenly found himself A few hours 
 before, he could not have conceived that he should be walking 
 on the ramparts of Portsmouth, gazing upon the transports as 
 they spread their canvas to the fair breeze, and stretched away 
 to the ocean. This sudden and decisive step was, upon first 
 reflection, a cause of much disappointment and regret to Mrs. 
 Winslow, who had looked forward to the army — for which, 
 from habit, she had now imbibed a strong liking — as the 
 future profession of her sons. She lived, however, to acknowl- 
 edge God's hand in this apparently adverse movement, and 
 gratefully to acquiesce in a circumstance which threatened to 
 bhght so much hope, but which, in reality, resulted in so much 
 good. And although her interest in military affairs never 
 entirely ceased, yet as her Christianity deepened, she desired, 
 and sought for her children other and more peaceful, yet not 
 less honorable and useful vocations. 
 
 Some years after Captain Winslow's retirement from the 
 army, his ample fortune became seriously impaired through ill- 
 advised and disastrous investments. It was this circumstance 
 — an important link in the chain of events, evolving God's 
 purposes of love — that suggested a removal to the United 
 States of America, as offering wider scope for a family com- 
 posed almost entirely of boys, and a place of residence more 
 favourable to resources now sadly crippled. Accordingly, at 
 the close of the Peninsular war, the subject of this Memoir, 
 accompanied by a family of ten children and several of her 
 
HER REMOVAL TO AMERICA. 57 
 
 attaclied household, embarked for New York. Her husband 
 — whom she Avas desirous of preceding, with a view of wel- 
 coming him, on his arrival, to a new and pleasant home — was 
 to follow her in a^ few months. It was a novel and a serious 
 undcjL'taking for a female, lone and unaided, — her eldest son 
 yet a minor, and her youngest child an infant at the breast. 
 Writers of taste have been wont to expatiate with great elo- 
 quence and feeling upon the sublimity presented in the spec- 
 tacle of a woman educated amidst the elegancies and indulg- 
 ences of prosperous life, meeting the sudden reverses of for- 
 tune with fortitude, and proving the comforter and the support 
 of her husband when bowed beneath the stern blast of adver- 
 sity. "As the vine, which has long twined its graceful foliage 
 about the oak, and been lifted by it into sunshine, will, when 
 the hardy plant is rifted by the thunderbolt, cling round it 
 with its caressing tendrils, and bind up its shattered boughs ; 
 so it is beautifully ordained by Providence, that woman, who 
 is the mere dependent and ornament of man in their happier 
 hours, shall be his stay and solace when smitten with sudden 
 calamity; winding herself into the rugged recesses of his 
 nature, tenderly supporting the drooping head, and binding up 
 the broken heart."* At no period of Mrs. Winslow's life did 
 her mental force and decision of character appear more tran- 
 scendent than now. The reverse of fortune, which well-nigh 
 crushed the spirits of her husband, but served to nerve and 
 animate her own. The calamity which despondingly de- 
 pressed him, gave intrepidity and elevation to her. She 
 struck upon an expedient and resolved upon its execution. 
 Few individuals, yet fewer of her gentle sex, could have 
 braced themselves to responsibilities so great, or would have 
 submitted to sacrifices so costly. To expatriate herself from a 
 land of such endeared associations — voluntarily to relinc[uish a 
 home of such luxurious comforts, and a circle of friendships so 
 choice — to adjust herself with such grace to altered circum- 
 stances — to confront with firmness new difficulties, and enter 
 cheerfully upon unknown trials, called into play no ordinary 
 powers, and fully realized the exquisite picture of woman in 
 adversity, as sketched with so much elegance and truth by the 
 American writer we have quoted, and for which, so accurate 
 iu the resemblance, she might have sat as the original. 
 
 ♦ Washington Irving. 
 3* 
 
58 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 It was in the month of June, 1815, accompanied by her 
 responsible charge, she embarked from Gravesend for New 
 York. The Divine precept, " Seek ye first the kingdom of 
 God and His rigliteousness," was still her guiding star. Hav- 
 ing engaged for her large party of ten children and her ser- 
 vants, the entire cabin of the vessel, she was not long in con- 
 secrating it to the service of God. As soon as possible, the 
 family altar was again reared, and throughout the voyage 
 she was enabled to maintain morning and evening worship ; 
 and during the day to carry out her httle plans of domestic 
 instruction and usefulness, Avith the same regularity and zeal 
 as at home. In this God remarkably aided her. For when 
 the voice of praise and prayer first ascended to the deck, the 
 captain, on ascertaining the cause, immediately gave the strictest 
 orders that all interruption should cease during the service ; 
 and he was frequently observed quietly to descend the com- 
 panion-way, take off his hat, and kneel outside the cabin 
 during the prayer. Pie was subsequently invited, with a few 
 others, who requested the favour, regularly to unite in the 
 family devotions. Thus did God honour one who, in her con- 
 scious weakness but godly sincerity, everywhere sought to 
 honour Him. It was a favourite maxim of hers, which many 
 readers of this A^olume will recognise, "Walk in the precept^ 
 and God will fulfil the irromiser In the intermediate part of 
 the ship she discovered a young lady, far advanced in a de- 
 cline, and who, with her little son, was on her way to rejoin 
 her husband. She immediately had her removed to her own 
 cabin, that she might administer to her temporal comfort, and 
 that the invalid migh tenjoy the daily rehgious privileges of 
 the family. Thus, one who was destined to expire with the 
 first breath she inhaled of the land air— for she died as the 
 ship dropped her anchor in the placid waters of the Hudson, 
 and before she met her husband — was permitted, ere she en- 
 tered the eternal world, to hear frequently explained, and 
 affectionately enforced, the grand theme of the gospel — that 
 Christ Jesus came into the world to save the chief of sinners. 
 
 Mrs. Winslow found, in the land of her adoption, a home 
 and a sanctuary. Furnished with introductions to some of 
 the leading families of New York, amongst whom were Colonel 
 Bayard, formerly of the British Consulate, and Divie Bethune, 
 the son-in-law and biographer of Mrs. Isabella Graham, she 
 was solaced with the reflection that, though an exile, and in ad- 
 
HER OPINION OF THE UNITED STATES. 59 
 
 • 
 
 versitj, she was not Avithout that sympathy and kindness which 
 to none is more welcome and soothing than to the lone heart of 
 the stranger. And, as the circle of her friendships widened, en- 
 riched by some of the most eminent for Christian influence 
 and worth, she soon discovered the continent that had attracted 
 her to its friendly coasts to be in hospitality and courtesy, as 
 in language and religion, the affectionate daughter of the land 
 she had left. And when, in after years, she quitted its shores, 
 to spend the evening of her life, and die, amid earlier scenes 
 and older friendships, the recollection of the land that had 
 afforded her a pleasant asylum in adversity, she still warmly 
 and gratefully cherished. America was hallowed ground to 
 her. The history of her sojourn upon its soil had engraven 
 its name more deeply and ineffaceably on her heart than 
 " France" was said to have been on the heart of Mary Queen 
 of Scots. Her interest in its prosperity never decreased. Its 
 religious literature, the histories of its churches, and, especially, 
 the biographies of its saints, beguiled, happily, many an hour 
 of her closing pilgrimage. She contemplated it with a kind 
 of prophetic interest. Its vast territory, its exhaustless capa- 
 bilities, and its glorious revivals, impressed her with the con- 
 viction that America was destined to be the future home of 
 the church, the Mount Ararat, where the Ark would repose 
 from the storms and convulsions of the Old World, the hemi- 
 sphere upon which would dawn the first light of the millennial 
 glory. There was but one dark spot in its history, over which 
 she wept ; and many a fervent petition she sent up to heaven 
 for its removal. That spot effaced, America would stand forth 
 peerless amongst the nations of the earth. Give her entire 
 population equal rights and liberty — civil and religious — and 
 she will soar in national greatness and in moral influence, like 
 her own symbolic eagle, to the sun. 
 
 And yet it was in this land that she was made to drink most 
 deeply of the waters of adversity. She had scarcely become 
 settled in her new and pleasant home ere death invaded it. 
 The infant daughter she had borne across the Atlantic sickened 
 and died. This was the first draught from sorrow's cup. That 
 cup was now to be brimmed. While the corpse of her babe 
 lay yet unentombed, the woeful intelligence reached her that 
 she was a widow! "Deep calleth unto deep at the noise of 
 thy waterspouts ; all thy waves and thy billows are gone over 
 me." Such was now her mournful experience. He letters 
 
60 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 written at this sad period of her history, a few of which only 
 are preserved, will best depict the deep and varied exercises 
 of her mind under this overwhelming calamity. Addressing 
 her eldest son, then in Bermuda, who, on receiving the tidings 
 of his father's death, hastened to England, she thus writes : — 
 
 "My precious Child, — ^^ew York, 1816. 
 
 " Your dear mother is imder the chastening hand of 
 God. My dear suffering infant lies a corpse : and the letter 
 containing the intelligence of your dear father's and my beloved 
 husband's death, was this day put into my hands. I am hum- 
 bled under the mighty hand of God. My soul is bowed down. 
 The death of my child was almost overwhelming; but the 
 death of my dear, my precious, my ever-to-be-lamented hus- 
 band, is the heaviest afSiction I have ever met with. I trust 
 the Lord will yet enable me to say, Thy ivill, God, not 
 mine, he done ! I wish you could have been there. Oh, that 
 you had been in time to have closed his eyes ! I need com- 
 fort. I am in a strange place. The Lord help me and in- 
 crease my faith ! The Lord have mercy upon me, for I am in 
 trouble. I trust his soul and the dear departed spirit of my 
 infant are now rejoicing together in glory. That is my only 
 comfort. I am too much afflicted to write more. May God 
 bless you, my child, prays your truly afflicted, widowed mother." 
 
 But overwhelming as was this affliction, God, whose chast- 
 enings are always tempered with mercy, left her not without 
 strong consolation. It was not in unmitigated and hopeless 
 grief that she wept. The last illness and closing scene of 
 Captain Winslow's life afforded satisfactory evidence that he 
 had sought and found the Saviour. His conviction of sin was 
 deep, and his believing reliance upon the atoning merits of the 
 Bedeemer earnest and childlike. He died in the assured hope 
 of an humble penitent, a sincere believer, "looking for the 
 mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ unto eternal hfe." Such was 
 the inexpressible comfort provided by Him whose hand had 
 now slain her fondest earthly treasure. She now saw the 
 fruit of her long travail of soul. Her prayers were answered, 
 though as by fire. " Thou calledst in trouble, and I delivered 
 thee ; I answered thee in the secret place of thunder : I proved 
 thee at the w^aters of Meribah." The long-sought mercy 
 came —her husband was saved ; but the blessing was draped 
 in woe. ' By terrible things in righteousness' God had an- 
 
INCONSOLABLE GRIEF. 61 
 
 swered her, and her ' song was of mercy and judgment.' The 
 blow fell, however, with crushing effect. Her mental dis- 
 tress seemed to baffle the kindest efforts of her pastor and her 
 friends to soothe. Her soul refused to be comforted. To the 
 deep son:ow of bereavement was now added the yet deeper 
 anguish of spiritual darkness and despondency. Satan was 
 permitted to buffet her, and, for a time, the dark waters went 
 over her soul. Thus the calamity that at once withered her 
 lovely flower, and broke the 'strong staff and the beautiful 
 rod,' was augmented by a momentary suspension of the Di- 
 vine presence. It was at this juncture the following hymn of 
 her favourite author, Newton, read casually to her by her son 
 E , spoke the first consolation to her sad heart. 
 
 " I ask'd the Lord that I might grow 
 In faith, and love, and every grace, 
 Might more of his salvation know, 
 And seek more earnestly his face. 
 
 " 'Twas he who taught me thus to pray. 
 And he, I trust, has answered prayer ; 
 But it has been in such a way 
 As almost drove me to despair. 
 
 " I hoped that in some favour'd hour 
 At once he'd answer my request, 
 And by his love's constraining power 
 Subdue my sins, and give me rest. 
 
 "Instead of this, he made me feel 
 The hidden evils of my heart. 
 And let the angry powers of hell 
 Assault my soul in every part. 
 
 " Yea, more ; with his own hand he seem'd 
 Intent to aggravate my woe, — 
 Cross'd all the fair designs I schemed, 
 Blasted ray gourds, and laid me low. 
 
 " ' Lord ! why is this ?' I trembling cried : 
 ' Wilt thou pursue thy worm to death V 
 
 ' 'Tis in this way,' the Lord replied, 
 ' I answer prayer for grace and faith. 
 
 " ' These inward trials I employ. 
 
 From self and pride to set thee free ; 
 And break thy schemes of earthly joy, 
 That thou may'st seek thy all in me.' " 
 
62 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 How well calculated were these richly experimental breath- 
 ings to pour the oil of soothing over the broken waters now 
 surging her soul ! Bereaved Christian, the same fount of con- 
 solation is yours. Approach, and drink abundantly. Your 
 pleasant picture is, perhaps, destroyed, your beauteous flower 
 has faded, your sheltering arm is withered ; but Jesus is yours, 
 your deathless Friend, the Brother born for your adversity, 
 and you have in Him all, and infinitely more, that was lovely 
 and loving, tender and protective, in the treasure you have 
 lost. This is but the Lord's all-wise and righteous mode of 
 drawing you into a greater nearness to Himself. 
 
 We continue a few of the letters addressed to her eldest 
 son at this period of her grief. "What a beauteous bow ap- 
 pears in the dark cloud of her afiQictions ! Blessed disciphne 
 that results in such weanedness ! 
 
 " My dearest Child, — Kew York, Feb. 7, 1816. 
 
 " I have but little spirits to write, but as I know you 
 will be anxious to hear from me, I have struggled with my 
 feelings to gratify you. The Lord has indeed laid His chast- 
 ening hand upon your afflicted mother. My precious, my 
 beloved husband I shall see no more in the flesh. But, oh, 
 what a comfort to my soul that I shall meet liim at the right 
 hand of God ! I grieve at his sufferings, and in imagination I 
 am ever hovering round his bed. My soul has been bowed 
 down, and I was afraid I should at first sink under so heavy 
 an affliction. Wave upon wave, bitter upon bitter. But the 
 Lord has said, As thy day, so shall thy strength he; and He has 
 
 been faithful to His promise. E has proved himself a 
 
 dear child ; he has been everything to me, at this trying time, 
 that I could wish. How gracious is the Lord to me ! It is 
 my Father that has chastened me, and it shall be for my good 
 and His glory. Now, my precious child, you are my most 
 anxious concern. You will need wisdom from above to direct, 
 and grace to uphold you every moment. Keep close to a 
 throne of grace, and doubt not the God of all grace will give 
 
 you both. Give my love to . It soothed my sorrow to 
 
 know that I possessed the love and friendship of some of God's 
 
 dearest, choicest people. Tell dear Miss M I feel very 
 
 grateful for her letter ; for though it cost me many tears, yet 
 it was by far the most satisfactory one I have had, and my 
 heart has thanked her for it a thousand times. Oh, that I 
 
LETTERS TO HER SON. 63 
 
 could have sat by his bedside as slie did ! Mysterious are the 
 ways of God ! This bereaving providence has done more to 
 wean me from the world, and show me the importance of eter- 
 nal things, than you can imagine. Blessed be God for all His 
 dispensations, the evil as well as the good. 
 
 ****** 
 
 " I am at times miserable indeed beyond conception. Past 
 scenes crowd upon my mind, and unavailing regrets seem to 
 overwhelm my better feelings. I have truly been laid low in 
 the dust, and abhor myself as the chief of sinners. For some 
 days Satan desired to have me, to sift me as wheat ; darkness 
 overpowered my mind ; doubts and fears respecting my ever- 
 lasting safety crowded upon me. This, too, was after I had 
 thought myself resigned to the will of God, and began to be 
 interested in my family concerns. I see it was the enemy. 
 Oh, that I had never left your precious father. See Mr. Shep- 
 herd, and beg he will relate to you exactly every word that 
 passed between him and my dear husband before he died. My 
 severe trials have awakened a general sympathy among the 
 dear people of God, who have visited and endeavoured to com- 
 fort me ; but vain is the help of man ; God alone can comfort. 
 Dr. Stamford, an excellent minister, called upon me, and 
 preached afterwards a sermon on the occasion of my bereave- 
 ment, from the words, — Shoio me wherefore thou contendest with 
 me; but I could not hear it, though I am told it was excel- 
 lent." 
 
 While it is painful to trace the bitter and unjust self-accusa- 
 tions contained in the following letter, it is at the same time 
 delightful to observe how richly the ' rod ' ' blossomed ' with 
 the holy fruits of her deeply-sanctified grief. 
 
 " My beloved Child, — Xew York, May 28, 1816. 
 
 " I have received your letter to-day, for which I have 
 been just thanking my God and your God, the Father to the 
 fatherless and the widow's God. I am thankful that He has 
 supported you under the severest trial you have been called 
 to meet with since you entered the vale of tears — the loss of 
 your dear, your precious father. Neither you nor I knew half 
 his worth. The Lord gave us a treasure, but we knew not 
 its value until too late. I hope this has been a sifting time 
 with you, as it has been with your poor mother. How great 
 a backslider have I been ! How did I let my vile heart go 
 
Gi MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 out after covetoiisness, and wander from the patli of duty, when 
 I left my beloved husband ! Oh, my dear child, this thought 
 liad well-nigh drove me to despair. But, blessed be the rock 
 of my salvation, that, though in some measure He has suffered 
 me to be sifted as wheat, and the enemy to come like a flood, 
 the Spirit helped my infirmities, and I was through Him en- 
 abled to keep a fast hold on the covenant ivMchis ordered in all 
 things and sure. My Father has chastened me, but his loving- 
 kindness he has not taken from me, nor suffered his faithful- 
 ness to fail. It has been good for me that I have been afflict- 
 ed. Oh, my child, self-righteousness, self-will, and a covetous 
 spirit have led me far astray ; but the Lord has overruled even 
 these hated sins for my good, and the salvation of the precious 
 soul of your dear beloved father. All is well. Soon Ave shall 
 meet again ; and this is my great consolation. We are in a 
 strange land ; but the God of Jacob is my God, and the God 
 of my fatherless ones. England is highly privileged for the 
 precious means of grace ; but we have here the simple truths 
 of the gospel, and much sterling piety amongst professors. 
 . . . Lord, have mercy upon me, and let me see Thy hand 
 in this ! Lead my mind to contemplate him where he now is. 
 For millions of worlds would he not return. But still my 
 widowed heart aches, and will ache while I live ; and yet I 
 trust the Lord has reconciled, or will reconcile me to His 
 blessed will. But I have touched a chord that unfits me al- 
 most for everything. 
 
 "May the Lord watch over you, and bring you in safety to 
 me. I have so many mercies for which I desire to be thank- 
 ful, but I am full of misgivings and unbelief, often ready to 
 exclaim. All these things are against me ! The Lord has sup- 
 ported me under a heavy and deep affliction ; what more lies 
 before me, He only knows loho ivorketh all things after the 
 counsel of His own ivill. My mind is often greatly exercised, 
 but the Lord has said, Leave thy fatherless children ; I will pre- 
 serve them alive. To Him do I desire to look, and in Him will 
 I trust. The promise is, Seek ye first the kingdom of God and 
 His righteousness, and all things else shall he added unto you. 
 Did I not hope to see the salvation of the Lord in the land of 
 the living, I should sink in despair. Oh, your dear father ! I 
 mourn. It is no sin to weep : Jesus wept at the grave of 
 Lazarus ; Mary and Martha wept ; and may not I also weep ? 
 I wish you would ,g;o to tlie vault whore your dear father lies, 
 
LETTERS TO HER SON. 65 
 
 and see if tliere is room for your poor unworthy mother too — 
 I wish to lay my bones by him ; if you can do this without 
 too much distressing your own feelings. I cannot account for 
 it, but it has been the constant desire of my heart, (as I can- 
 not see it myself,) that you should see the coffin that contains 
 his beloved body. I shall see that body again, shining more 
 gloriously than the brightest angel in heaven." 
 
 TVe w^ill not longer detain the reader on this mournful part 
 of her history, than to quote a short extract from one of her 
 letters to her eldest son, which blends a cheering lio-ht with 
 the dark shadows in this picture of woe. It is instructive, and 
 to the afflicted believer encouraging, to behold the sparklings 
 of the gold amidst the ' fires ' of the furnace. 
 
 "At times my spirits are low, but I know it is for my good 
 that I have been afflicted ; and I see plainly why it has been 
 permitted, and have to acknowledge that the Lord, even in 
 this, has not chastened me according to my backslidings. I 
 see love and mercy directing this stroke, and I trust it will be 
 abundantly sanctified to my soul. Your dear father is now 
 rejoicing amongst the redeemed, and it will not be long before 
 we shall meet again to part no more for ever. I have indeed 
 been humbled to the very dust, and my mind brought into 
 greater darkness and distress than I ever experienced before, 
 in addition to my great loss. I often sat upon the floor, and 
 wept aloud in an agony of mind impossible to describe ; but 
 the Lord has put the enemy to flight, and again blest me with 
 a sense of His loving-kindness ; so that my mind, upon the 
 whole, is comfortable and stayed upon my God. Tribulation 
 must be felt, or it would not he tribulation ; and it is needful. 
 I think I have learnt more of my dreadfully wicked heart, and 
 the preciousness of Jesus, during this trial, than I ever learnt 
 before. It has been a bitter disciphne, but I hope, with God's 
 blessing, it will bring forth the 2:>eaceable fruits of righteousness ; 
 tending to wean me from the world and from self, and causing 
 me to know where my great strength lieth. Let us go to the 
 Lord, who knows best, for direction ; taking care not to lay 
 down a plan for om-selves, before we ask His counsel, lest He 
 
 leave us to smart for our folly. Thank Mrs. H , and tell 
 
 her I shall never forget her kindness to my dear husband. It 
 was like a Christian, and may the Lord bless her a thousand 
 times for it. My heart is full, and I am weeping while I 
 write." 
 
66 MEMOIR OP MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 The most touching review of this part of her history, written 
 maii}^ years after, is from a narrative addressed to her family. 
 AVe have no strong predilection in favour of dreams, nor did 
 the subject of this Memoir regard them with superstitious rev- 
 erence ; and yet of old the Lord did sometimes make known 
 His will by dreams, and even appointed individuals especially 
 to interpret them. It was in a dream that the mystic ladder 
 appeared to Jacob ; it was by a dream that prophetic revela- 
 tions were made to Joseph ; and, under the New Testament 
 dispensation, it was still by a dream that the angel of the Lord 
 appeared to Joseph, the husband of Mar}^, on several occasions. 
 And among the signs of the universal spread of the Gospel, 
 we are prophetically told this shall be one. " It shall come 
 to pass, that I will pour out my Spirit upon all flesh ; your 
 sons and your daughters shall j^rophesy ; your old men shall 
 dream dreams ; your young men shall see visions."* We 
 would be cautious therefore, of speaking lightly of this mode 
 of producing sacred impressions on the mind. " In thoughts, 
 from the visions of the night, when deep sleep falleth on 
 man,"f we know not Avhat communications God may make, 
 what tf uths He may illustrate, or what lessons He may teach. 
 We should keep in mind, however, that the revealed word of 
 God is our only and sure ' word of prophecy, to which we do 
 well that we take heed as unto a light that shineth in a dark 
 place.' It is thus Mrs. Winslow narrates her mental exercises 
 at this time: — 
 
 " Soon after I was brought to the feet of Jesus, I had a re- 
 markable dream ; and although I place but little confidence in 
 dreams in general, I think this did mean something. I thought 
 I was in the cabin of a ship in the midst of the ocean. There 
 were others with me. We appeared to face the windows of 
 the cabin, from which alone we had light. I appeared with 
 others, struggling to get nearer to the hght, but some invisible 
 being seemed to draw us back at every step we advanced to- 
 wards the window. And still the struggle continued. My 
 eyes were towards the light, but I could make no progress. 
 Presently the roof of the cabin disappeared, and I saw one like 
 an angel coming down from heaven. He approached nearer 
 and nearer, and fixing his eyes upon me, with such a counte- 
 nance of compassion and love I cannot describe, said, ' I am 
 
 * Joel IL 28. f Job iv. 13. 
 
A REMARKABLE DREAM. 67 
 
 with thee.' I exclaimed aloud, ' It is the Son of God ! ' He 
 then ascended, and became like a bird in the air, but not out 
 of sight. Then the tormentors commenced again, and the 
 struggle to get disengaged from them was renewed. Once 
 more the same blessed Being descended, and with the same 
 benignant look repeated the words, ' I am with thee.' While 
 He spake all was quiet, but as soon as He ascended as before, 
 the battle with our invisible enemies continued. The third 
 time He came down, when He said, ' I \vill be with thee even 
 unto the end.' Every object instantly disappeared. He took 
 me in His arms, and appeared to go under the waves. I was 
 tranquil, and felt no fear, but weary, rested my head upon His 
 bosom. How long we were under the water I know not, but 
 it appeared not a moment ere He arose with me, still in His 
 arms, and ascended towards heaven ; and then my joy, my 
 ecstasy, was so overwhelming, my bosom heaved, and I 
 awoke. The impression left upon my mind by this ' vision of 
 the night,' I have never lost. What appeared but a dream 
 has since become a reality. How has the Lord upheld me in 
 the deep, dark waters, not suffering them to overwhelm me 
 quite. He has kept my head above them, so that I sank not 
 in their midst. In the dark night of my weeping He was 
 near ; His eye. His loving eye, was upon me. God's children 
 came to me, but my sorrow seemed too deep for their sympa- 
 thy to reach : they endeavoured to comfort me, but vain was 
 their effort. One day, when alone, my heart overwhelmed 
 within me, a man of God, ' a son of consolation, ' was sent to 
 me. He drew me out to disclose all my feelings, my doubts, 
 and misgivings of God's love. I opened my heart to him in 
 perfect confidence, and the Spirit enabled him to open his 
 mouth for God. He unfolded God's eternal and unchangeable 
 love to His children, and proved from every part of the Sacred 
 Volume, that it was not because I was not His child, He had 
 chastened me ; but because I was His child. Long and faith- 
 ful was his conversation, and oh, how comforting ! I felt all 
 that he said. Every word brought conviction to my mind 
 and comfort to my heart. 'Then,' I exclaimed, lifting my 
 eyes to heaven, and clasping my hands, ' God is still my 
 Father, my reconciled Father.' Light broke into my be- 
 nighted soul, my heart opened to receive the message the 
 Lord had sent by His dear servant, the enemy fled from me, 
 and I w^as comforted. To know I was still His, and that His 
 
68 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 love was unchanged, strengthened me to look up to Him from 
 whence my lielp came. I was comforted, too, by a letter your 
 dear father wrote to me during his illness. I believe tlie Lord 
 took me from him that he might not lean upon an arm of 
 flesh for comfort, but upon Himself alone. He did so. He 
 fled to Jesus, and was saved. The Lord had taken him from 
 the evil to come ; and now I was to gird my mind to bear the 
 burden alone, He supported me." 
 
 We are henceforth to contemplate Mrs. Winslow as occu- 
 pying a new and untried position in life, involving responsi- 
 i^ilities and cares of no ordinary character. She was now a 
 widow, with a large family of sons dependent upon her for 
 their training and settlement in life. " She that is a widow 
 indeed, and desolate, trusteth in God." Such was her present 
 condition. The surges of grief now yielded to a calm, intel- 
 ligent survey of her position. She threw herself upon God. 
 The covenant she made with him when a wife, she now and 
 more solemnly renewed as a widow, — that the Lord should be 
 her God. It was at this important crisis of her history that 
 the following touching incident in her experience occurred : — 
 
 " I had sent one of my sons, a youth of ten years old, ac- 
 companied by a servant, across the river on a matter of busi- 
 ness. The appointed time for his return arrived, but he did 
 not appear. Hour after hour passed away, and nightfall drew 
 on, but he came not. The last steamboat touched the pier, 
 but he was not on board. I walked my room for hours in 
 prayer, and in great agitation of mind. Keenly did I then 
 feel my lonely, helpless w^idowhood. Again and again I 
 sought the Lord. After passing hours in this state of mental 
 anxiety, I sent a brother in search, and soon after, all made 
 their appearance. He had missed his way. The Lord heard 
 a mother's prayer, and brought him in safety to me. After all 
 had retired for the night, I was left alone with God. My 
 mind and heart had been greatly exercised throughout the 
 day. I felt deeply my helplessness and responsible situation. 
 I thought, ' How can I, a helpless woman, care for, and train 
 up, these children to manhood ? ' I felt I should sink beneath 
 the overwhelming conviction of my weakness and insufficiency. 
 I paced my room in prayer, tried to take hold of a promise ; 
 but all was dark, the present and the future, as midnight. It 
 was late before I retired to rest. In vain I endeavoured to 
 compose myself; sleep had forsaken me. Again I lifted up 
 
AN ESPECIAL PROMISE. 69 
 
 my heart in prayer. I tried to cease from thinking, and to 
 close my eyehds, but in vain. All night I continued in prayer, 
 until just before the dawn of the day these words were spoken 
 to my ear and heart, as if an audible voice had uttered them : 
 ' I WILL BE A Father to thy fathfrless children.' I 
 knew this voice, and could make no mistake. So powerful 
 was it, I instantly replied aloud, ' Lord, he thou the Father 
 of my fatherless, my God!' Oh, the solemnity of that 
 hour ! I felt G-od was with me, and my soul was filled with 
 joy and holy reverence. He had condescended to visit my 
 lone room, and fill it with His presence. He had come to 
 comfort his widowed child, and I ivas comforted. My soul 
 poured out its grateful acknowledgments. I could adore, and 
 praise, and bless His holy name. A solemn, sacred influence 
 pervaded the place. God was with me, of a truth. Fatigued 
 with the anxieties of the day, and exhausted with the mental 
 exercises through which I had passed that night, I composed 
 myself to rest. The Lord withdrew, and my weary eyes 
 were closed in refreshing sleep. Years have passed since 
 then, and the Lord has not for one moment forgotten His prom- 
 ise. But I take the promise to extend beyond this poor 
 dying world. Had the Lord given each of my children a 
 w^orld, and they should lose their souls, what would it profit 
 them ? I believe He designs to be their Father to all eternity, 
 and that I shall meet all, all my children in heaven. How 
 often have I gone and pleaded this promise before Him, and 
 have always found my faith increased. And still my faith 
 holds out; for He is faithful that has j^romised.'" 
 
 From the moment God sealed upon her sorrowing heart this 
 especial and remarkable promise, causing her to rest in His 
 own veracity as the pledge of its fulfilment, she became ani- 
 mated as by a new and mighty impulse. Her natural spirits, 
 unstrung by grief, and her mental powers, paralyzed by anxiety, 
 now acquired fresh tone and energy. An overwhelming pres- 
 sure of despondency and care seemed suddenly and entirely 
 to be lifted from off her mind. Strengthened with might in 
 the inner man, she cast her care on God ; and girding herself 
 anew for the arduous duties to which he now summoned her, 
 with a calmness ofjudgment, a firmness of resolution, and a 
 reliance of faith, equal to the dignity of her position, she cheer- 
 fully met and vigorously discharged all its claims. The prom- 
 ise thus given proved as a sheet-anchor to her soul in many 
 
70 MEMOIR OF MRS. MiRY WINSLOW. 
 
 a subsequent hour of storm and cloud. And when at times — 
 for such there were— the sentence of death seemed Avritten 
 upon it, her faith in God never faltered ; giving to that prom- 
 ise, as she herself tells us, its widest range of meaning, she 
 rose al30ve the temporal blessing it involved, and claimed, as 
 the only limit of its fulfilment, a divine heritage, a spiritual 
 birthright, an eternal home for her orphan ones. She knew 
 that she had to do with a Being, all whose resources of power, 
 wisdom and love were as boundless as His own infinity ; who 
 was not only a prayer-hearing, and a prayer-answering, but also 
 a prayer-exceeding God ; and who, in the bestowment of His 
 blessings upon His people, never gave less, but always more 
 than He had promised, or than they had asked. She rea- 
 soned — and it was the logical reasoning of true faith — that if 
 God, in the lone hours of that night of weeping and of prayer, 
 had engaged to be a Father to her fatherless children, that en- 
 gagement bound Him to them as their Heavenly Father. To 
 this broad interi^retation of the pledge, she held Him with a 
 grasp which never for an instant relaxed. And when she 
 died, it was in the firm, unfaltering faith of that promise. Not 
 having received its complete fulfilment, but viewing it afar off, 
 she was persuaded of it, embraced it, and closed her eyes with 
 an undimmed, unshaken assurance, that it would be even as 
 God had said, and that she would meet again all the children 
 He had given her — an undivided family in heaven. 
 
 And yet it must not be inferred from this that her path 
 henceforth was never beclouded by the shadows of a fluctuating 
 faith, or that she was no more of an anxious and a doubtful 
 mind. Far from this. Where are the evidences of grace in 
 the absence of infirmity ? And where the victories of faith in 
 the non-resistance of unbelief? There were seasons — many 
 indeed — when she was cast down with anxious care and pain- 
 ful foreboding. Alone, and with but the wreck of former 
 affluence, she was called to meet the growing demands of a 
 family of nine sons, fast advancing into manhood. It was only 
 by a careful husbanding and wise expenditure of her crippled 
 resources that she was enabled to educate them for professional 
 life ; but with God's blessing upon her judicious, self-sacrificing 
 efforts it was accomplished; and "her children rise up to call 
 her blessed." As her sons advanced in years, she parted from 
 them, one by one, with a view to the completion of their edu- 
 cation at home. There, beneath the eye of her elder son, who 
 
LETTER TO HER SON. 71 
 
 now merged the relationship of an elder brother in the higher 
 one of a foster-father, they were trained for their future posi- 
 tions in life. It was on one of these occasions that she 
 penned the following letter to one of her sons, then a youth, 
 on his way home to pursue his professional studies, and now 
 usefully engaged as a clergyman of the Church of England : — 
 
 " My pkecious George, — New York, 1818. 
 
 " I hope before this comes to hand you are with 
 your dear brother* and sister. This is the fourth day since 
 you left me, and my prayers have been offered up for you 
 morning, noon, and night ; and often has my heart ascended 
 on your behalf, when I have been otherwise engaged. "When 
 my weeping eyes followed you, I felt an inexpressible sweet- 
 ness and comfort in offering up this short prayer, — ' Now, 
 Father, I commit this child into Thy hands. Follow him 
 with thy blessing, shield him from every evil, carry him in 
 safety where he is going, and let him be Thine for time and 
 for eternity. Fulfil Thy promise, on which Thou hast caused 
 Thine handmaid to hope, and be Thou a Father to her father- 
 less children.' From that moment my heart was comforted, 
 though I felt the separation. The night was wet and gloomy, 
 and I followed you in imagination to your lonely berth, ill, 
 and wishing yourself by our comfortable fireside at home. I 
 have thought of you almost continually, my dear boy ; for you 
 are now without a friend or relative. But God is with you, 
 and that comforts me. Your dear brothers tried to look cheer- 
 ful when they returned to me, but I could see they were much 
 affected. While I am writing, you are at this moment on the 
 mighty deep : but, as Mrs. Isabella Graham says, ' it is God's 
 ocean,' — my God's. 
 
 " 20th. — My dear G , when we all gather round the 
 
 evening fireside, I find myself looking, every now and then, 
 at the door, expecting to see you enter ; and once or twice, 
 when we have been going to read the Bible, I have waited a 
 moment or two, looking round for an absejit one, who I then 
 recollected was far, very far away from me. How often have 
 I carried you in the arms of faith to a throne of grace, be- 
 seeching the Lord to put His hand upon you and bless you. 
 Oh, my child, if you but knew the blessedness of the religion 
 
 * Her eldest son T., then recently married and settled in England. 
 
72 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WJNSLOW. 
 
 of Jesus, its sweetness, rich enjoyment, and reality, you would 
 not rest a moment until you could call the Lord your own." 
 
 To her eldest son she thus writes : — 
 
 " I felt so distressed through the whole day and night, at 
 not hearing from you on the arrival of the packet, that to 
 change the scene, and give a turn to my thoughts, I set out 
 
 on a visit to my sweet E , at Mrs. B 's.* I should 
 
 tell you, however, that I had heard through Captain that 
 
 G was well, though he had not reached you. For this, I 
 
 failed not to thank my God, and to implore His aid to 
 strengthen me, and enable me to bear up under this and every 
 other disappointment and trial, through what His infinite wis- 
 dom should see fit I should pass while on my pilgrimage 
 through this wilderness. I felt sensible I was aiming in my 
 own strength to be resigned to His will and to trust Him ; 
 and knowing how impossible it was for me to do this, went to 
 His footstool and confessed my weakness and total inability to 
 do anything without Him. And oh ! how graciously does He 
 at all times deal with His unworthy child, His ungrateful, un- 
 believing child. B is in affliction, and I am obliged to 
 
 remind her of the faithfulness of our God, His promises. His 
 boundless love towards His children ; His power and goodness 
 enabling Him to perform them all; and in doing so, my own 
 spirits are revived, my own faith and confidence increased by 
 the recital; and I am helped thereby to go on from day to 
 day with a cheerfulness, under circumstances which I should 
 have thought, formerly, would have made me lose my reason 
 or break my heart. I speak not of want ; for, blessed be His 
 holy name. He has never suffered me to want any good thing 
 that was absolutely necessary for me; for I am certain, that 
 what I have thought I wanted, it were better I should want; 
 for had it not been so, infinite love would have given it me." 
 
 "December 26th. — My soul longs for the privilege of again 
 hearing a full gospel. I feel my poverty, and my need of 
 Christ, more and more But I do believe these exer- 
 cises of soul, which I often have in consequence of this low 
 state of spiritual enjoyment, will ultimately prove to my ad- 
 vantage, and for the glory of God. My choicest seat is at the 
 foot of the cross. When I can but view His bleeding w^ounds, 
 and obtain one glance by faith of His gracious countenance, it 
 
 * The boarding-school at which her daughter was placed. 
 
HER BAPTISM. 73 
 
 is worth a thousand worlds to me. Nothing else can give me 
 joy an.d comfort. I have had not a few battles with Satan, 
 as it respects past experience, and have been put to my wits' 
 end; but I find it is the safest to keep close to Jesus; and as 
 I came at first, so I come again and again ; in this way the foe 
 is defeated, and my soul is melted with love, while He lifts 
 upon me His heavenly countenance." 
 
 If there were one feature in the religious character of Mrs. 
 Winslow more distinct and palpable than any other, and which, 
 as her Christianity ripened, became a yet more strongly de- 
 veloped, firmly rooted, and all-controlling principle of her life, 
 it was the profound homage with which her whole soul bowed 
 to the supreme authority of God's revealed word. To her 
 enlightened view, no doctrine was propounded in the Bible, 
 the belief of which was a matter of indifference ; and no pre- 
 cept was enjoined, the observance of which was a question of 
 choice. As a child of God, to obey instantly and unquestion- 
 ingly, she regarded as an imperious duty; and as a Christian 
 disciple, to mould her walk according to the example of the 
 Saviour, she counted her sweetest privilege. With her, hu- 
 man opinion, worldly interest, self-ease, were as the fine dust 
 in the balance weighed in the scale with her Lord's solemn 
 and comprehensive injunction — "Teaching them to observe 
 all things whatsoever I have commanded you." Influenced 
 by this principle — a principle which governed the lowliest ac- 
 tions of her life — and in compliance with what she interpreted 
 as a divine and positive injunction, we find her avowing her 
 faith in Christ, and dedicating herself anew to the Lord, in 
 the solemn rite of believers' baptism. 
 
 The spiritual reader, who may not see eye to eye with her 
 on this subject — and there will be many such — cannot yet fail 
 to approve the principle which governed her, and to reverence 
 the conscienciousness which dictated the step. Addressing 
 her mother from New York, she writes : — 
 
 " I trust you will, by God's blessing, be able to come to us 
 in the spring. I had intended to have written to you with 
 respect to my baptism, but the subject requires a clearer head 
 and a mind less agitated than mine is at present. But, my 
 beloved mamma, I saw it to be a plain and positive command 
 of Christ, and I am called to obey Him, as far as He gives me 
 light so to do. I have for years been impressed with the im- 
 portance of the subject. I read in my Bible that only those 
 4 
 
74 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 who helieved, or had true faith, were the scriptural subjects of 
 baptism ; ivhosoever beh'eveth and is haptizcd. Infants cannot 
 believe, and consequently baptism, in their case, loses its sig- 
 nificance. Nor could I, in all my examination, find a solitary 
 passage or example in the New Testament, that wnll lead me 
 to the conclusion for a moment, that children were baptized in 
 the early church. But in the time of the apostles, as soon as 
 sinners, or adults, were called through grace to believe, they 
 were baptized and added to the church, I shall some time 
 hence write more fully to you on the subject. I have not 
 
 heard from T since he sailed for England ; but the Lord 
 
 is my help, and in every trial and trouble my soul looks to and 
 and leans upon Him, and I am comforted." 
 
 In the midst of her personal sorrow and domestic duties she 
 found time for walks of practical Christian usefulness. In 
 one of these rambles she met with the following remarkable 
 instance of the grace of God in a poor idiot girl : " The en- 
 trance of Thy word giveth light; it giveth understanding unto 
 the simple," Such was the case with poor Ellen, who had been 
 brought to a knowledge of the truth through the instrumiental- 
 ity of the Rev. Archibald Maclay, the then esteemed pastor 
 of Mrs. Winslow. On every other subject but the love of 
 Christ to her, the mind of the poor idiot was a perfect blank. 
 But on this, the deepest and sublimest of all themes, she spake 
 with a sincerity and earnestness of feeling which the most 
 eloquent language could not express. In one of her letters, 
 Mrs, Winslow details an interesting visit to this pious imbe- 
 cile : — 
 
 " I entered the little room. It was clean and tidy, with a 
 bed in one corner farthest from the fire, by the side of Avhich, 
 in an old arm chair, sat an idiot girl about seventeen years 
 of age. She was dressed neatly, and looked happy, though 
 ill. Her mother, a respectable -looking woman, was by her 
 side. I took an offered chair, and draAving near the girl, asked 
 her how she was. She replied, 'Sick.' 'And what have you 
 in your lap?' pointing to a book which lay there. She opened 
 it, and with an expression of delight I shall not soon forget, 
 reached it to me. It was the New Testament. 'Do you love 
 the Lord, my dear child?' 'Oh, yes,' she replied, though with 
 great difficulty; 'Jesus is good.' 'He is good, my poor child; 
 what a mercy for you that He has enabled you to know it.' 
 'Oh, yes,' she repeated again, 'Jesus is good. Mr. Maclay 
 
A PIOUS IDIOT. 75 
 
 good man; Mr. Maclaj tell poor Ellen of Jesus.' I turned in- 
 quiringly to her mother, who told me her simple, affecting 
 story. She had a year or two back been convinced that she 
 was a sinner, and her distress of mind in consequence was so 
 great, that it brought on the illness (paralysis) with which she 
 is now affected. Her intellect, feeble from her birth, is now 
 nearly gone, and she is unable to understand little else but 
 that 'Jesus is good, and loves poor Ellen,' and this is her con- 
 stant cry. She is always reading her New Testament, which, 
 with a hymn-book, is her constant companion. She was very 
 attentive to all I said of the Lord, and listened with great 
 eagerness. I read to her a hymn she gave me, and then, look- 
 ing earnestly in my face, she said, pausing between each word. 
 In — my — Father s — house — are — many — mansions. As she 
 could with difficulty speak, I repeated to her the following 
 verses. But, oh, what an expression of joy and delight did 
 she manifest! Her whole body was convulsed, and her ecstasy 
 seemed too much for her poor shattered frame to bear. She 
 spread both her hands before her face, while tears of joy stood 
 in her eyes. As soon as she could speak, 'Jesus is good; 
 Jesus loves poor Ellen,' were the words which seemed most 
 fully to express her whole heart. So great was her agitation, 
 and so incessantly and rapidly were these words repeated, I 
 was compelled to lay my hands gently upon her, and soothe 
 her to silence. When I left her humble abode, I thought, 
 'There dwells an heir of glory, a joint heir with Christ Jesus, 
 in a cellar kitchen, rich in faith.' Oh, how true the precious 
 word of God: God hath chosen the foolish things of the world, 
 and weak things of the ivorld, and base things of the world, and. 
 things ivhich are despised, and things which are not, that no flesh 
 should glory in his j^resence,^^ 
 
 She was not without her severe conflicts of faith; yet we 
 always trace in her experience the irrepressible energy of this 
 mighty grace under circumstances of its deepest trial. Ad- 
 dressing her children from New York, she says: 
 
 ". . . . I have nothing new myself to communicate to 
 you, but I feel a desire to say to you all this evening, 'How 
 are you?' 'Is it well with you?' 'Is it well with your chil- 
 dren?' It will be a long time before I can get an answer. 
 But my God is your God ; and though a vast ocean divides us. 
 He is present with us both, and has engaged that it shall be 
 well; yea, that it is weU with his people. What a mercy that 
 
76 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 a throne of grace is accessible to us both, and at the same time 
 where we meet in Christ, and under the influence of the same 
 Spirit commend each other to the tender care of our dear Re- 
 deemer, who has undertaken to manage all our concerns. Oh 
 that I could at all times take the comfort of this precious truth, 
 and be careful for nothing, but with prayer and thanksgiving 
 make all my requests known to the Lord. My faith is but 
 small at present; sometimes I stand in doubt whether I have 
 any at all; and there have been seasons when I have been 
 tempted to think I never had known the grace of God in truth. 
 For some months past I have had sharp conflicts with my cor- 
 rupt nature and the old adversary ; and when I have cried out 
 in agony of soul, 'Lord, have mercy! Lord, hear! can I be 
 thine? can I be thy child?' this passage of Scripture has in- 
 variably presented itself to my mind. Cast not away your con- 
 fidence^ which hath great recompense of reward. I thought it 
 strange that this passage was ever on my mind, so that I could 
 repeat it aloud as I walked the streets. Nevertheless, I am 
 still called to follow as under a cloud. I feel my vileness, my 
 unprofitableness, my woful shortcomings, and am thankful if I 
 can but only creep to the foot of the cross, and there repose 
 my weary soul refreshed by one look at Jesus, who, 1 do trust, 
 died for my sins. But oh, I want to be more conformable 
 to His lovely image, to be sanctified, body, soul, and spirit, 
 and to have every power of my mind under the constant influ- 
 ence of the Holy Spirit. You, too, have in some degree been 
 in the furnace, but I trust it has been sanctified to you both. 
 You have gone on so prosperously that it was time for the 
 Lord to try your grace. The faith that is not tried is doubt- 
 ful. Trials and crosses test the Christian's faith and Christ's 
 faithfulness, and these things bring rich experience to the be- 
 liever's soul which otherwise he would never have had. 
 
 The following family incident will interest the reader, only 
 so far as afi'ording an illustration of Mrs. Winslow's energy of 
 character, and the deep religious sentiment w^hich pervaded 
 and sanctified all her secular engagements. There is a passing 
 allusion to one of the most catholic Christians, able statesmen, 
 and distinguished philanthropists of his age. With William 
 WiLBERFORCE it was her privilege to be on terms of sacred 
 friendship. His " Practical View of Christianity" was one of 
 her favourite works; and in the early stages of her religious 
 experience, contributed materially to mould and establish her 
 
MEMORIAL TO THE KING. 77 
 
 opinions. To the latest period of life, she cherished, for the 
 memory of this illustrious man, feelings of the most profound 
 veneration. The writer, then a little boy, has a vivid recol- 
 lection of accompanying her on a morning visit to him at Ken- 
 sington Gore, and of receiving some confectionery, offered with 
 the most winning kindness, from those hands which, more than 
 all others, had laboured to wrench the shackles from the slave. 
 The extract that follows refers to a presentation, through Mr. 
 "Wilberforce, of claims supposed to exist upon the British Gov- 
 ernment for the confiscation of large family estates in the 
 North American colonies, when those colonies separated from 
 the Crown. A short time before the revolution, the Provin- 
 cial Council, which, until about the year 1765, was always 
 the aristocratic branch of the Legislature, and, of course, com- 
 posed of the most distinguished individuals in the country, 
 had, for the most part, become attached to the popular party, 
 and hence, in opposition to the Governor.* In consequence 
 of this, commissions were granted by mandamus to distin- 
 guish loyalists, of whom the father of Captain Winslow was 
 one. It is supposed, however, that he never acted under this 
 commission. The appointment was in opposition to the gene- 
 ral sentiments of the people, which soon afterwards terminated 
 in the revolution and ultimate separation of the colonies from 
 the mother country. The consequence of the acceptance of 
 this office, however, was the rehnquishment and subsequent 
 confiscation of a large family property in Boston, U. S., and 
 for the indemnification for such a sacrifice, it was thought, just 
 claims existed upon the Government at home. Writing to 
 her son, she says : — 
 
 " I must now tell you I have petitioned the King with re- 
 spect to your dear father's claims. You may remember how 
 often he intended to prefer those claims himself, on account 
 of his father's services and his own, but never lived to put his 
 intentions into execution. I have, therefore, written to Mr. 
 Wilberforce, and also to Lord Dundas, under cover of my peti- 
 tion, urging them to exert themselves on my behalf. I know 
 that I shall get nothing without the Lord's blessing attends it ; 
 but the hearts of Kings and Princes are in His hands ; to Him 
 I have committed the thing, and hope I shall be satisfied, 
 whatever be the result. Your grandfather Winslow was one 
 
 * Hutchinson. 
 
7B MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 of the King's mandamus Counsellors in Boston ; and durmg 
 the Revolution he quitted it, and all his vast property, to fol- 
 low the army, but died before he reached home. In conse- 
 quence of this, your father lost the fortune that would have 
 been his on coming of age. Your father entered the British 
 service at seventeen, serving both at home and abroad. These 
 are the outlines of my claims upon Government, and I men- 
 tion them to you, as you may be questioned upon the subject. 
 I thought it would be worth while for you to call on Mr. Wil- 
 berforce, at Kensington Gore, and ascertain if there is any 
 likelihood of the claims being recognized. I have referred him 
 to Judge Leonard, who knew your grandfather, and also to 
 Colonel Backhouse, under whom your father served for many 
 years. But all my concerns are in the best hands. However, 
 make every prudent inquiry about it ; and may He who is the 
 widow's God give you all the wisdom that you may need, and 
 follow your attempt to serve your mother with His best bless- 
 ing. You remember when the widow, whose son Elijah had 
 restored to life, cried to the king for her lands, the prophet's 
 servant stood by and pointed her out to him. The Lord 
 opened the king's heart, and her request was granted, even 
 more than she asked. That same God is my God, and still 
 tuorketh all things after the council of His own will. Be not 
 faithless hut believing. ^^ 
 
 Powerful as was the interest with which this memorial was 
 sustained, it failed to secure a response to the prayer, in con- 
 sequence of the length of time that had elapsed in preferring 
 the claim. But higher concerns now engaged her thoughts, as 
 will appear from the following extracts from correspondence 
 with her family : — 
 
 " Your grandmamma seems quite young again. How gra- 
 ciously the Lord has in all things dealt with his aged hand- 
 maid ! She has outlived nearly all her relatives and early 
 friends ; they are passed into eternity, while she has been 
 spared, and blessed to her old age with a knowledge of the 
 truth, and with a stable peace and reliance upon her Saviour 
 for all that is needful for time and for eternity. Her frame 
 and feelings are seldom very lively, but her faith steady, and 
 her peace unceasing. Her spiritual joy is not great, but she 
 goes on her way relying on God, and looking forward without 
 a fear to the moment when she will be called to pass the dreary 
 valley of the shadow of death. While I have my changes, 
 
HER COMMUNION WITH GOD. 79 
 
 sometimes rejoicing in my Saviour, and triumphing over all 
 that opposes my way ; at other times cast down, feeling my 
 unworthiness, and afraid of deceiving myself, she is passing on 
 her way like the sun without a cloud. But our God is wise 
 in all His dispensations towards His people, and all my exer- 
 cises are needful. 
 
 " Oct. 21st. — Oh what a mercy is a throne of grace ! I think 
 I never knew the value of prayer so much as of late. Since I 
 have parted with so many of my children, I feel I have so 
 much more to do with God. I have so many more petitions 
 to present for you all, that it seems to me a more constant in- 
 tercourse is kept up between my soul and Jesus, and thereby 
 enables me to discover such a fulness, such a sufficiency, such 
 goodness, and boundless, matchless love, that at times I can 
 but kneel and weep. My mind is led from earthly things to 
 longing desires after conformity to His holy likeness. Oh, to 
 be holy ! How beautiful does holiness appear to be ! To be 
 holy is to be happy. May the Lord sanctify us ! A little 
 while and we shall be done with those things that but too often 
 encumber us, and then, oh, what glory awaits the believing 
 soul ! 
 
 "January 17. — The cold is intense. Last night, while in- 
 terceding with the Lord to have pity upon the poor and needy, 
 and supply their wants during this trying season, I recollected 
 a widow woman had called on me for help a week ago, but 
 from various causes I had done nothing in her case. I felt 
 humbled before a heart-searching God for my neglect, and this 
 morning I set off and found out her abode, above the Vaux- 
 hall Gardens. Her httle stock of fuel was out ; and finding it 
 a wortliy case, I gave her a note to the Widows' Society, and 
 no doubt she will be supplied with a load of wood. I then 
 called on a young woman in a consumption. She says she 
 has no hope for eternity. I directed her to Jesus, and then 
 left her." 
 
CHAPTER V. 
 
 A RESIDENCE of nearly five years in a new, and, to an 
 European constitution, somewhat trying climate, had greatly 
 impaired her health, and rendered essential to its recovery a 
 sea voyage and a season of entire repose. Accordingly, in 
 1820, accompanied by one of her sons, she recrossed the At- 
 lantic, and spent four or five months with the elder branches 
 of her family. Her first return to England since her sore be- 
 reavement, it were not difficult to imagine what would be the 
 intensity of her thoughts and feehngs on revisiting once more 
 the scenes of former prosperity and happiness. Landing at 
 Deal, she travelled all night, and arrived in London in the 
 grey light of morning, while yet the vast metropolis was 
 wrapped in profound stillness, presenting all the appearance of 
 a great city of the dead. But the sombre and grave-like aspect 
 of the town harmonized with the feelings of her lone and sad- 
 dened heart. Her course from the place where she alighted 
 brought her in view of endeared and sacred spots — the pleasant 
 home which had been the scene of so many years of domestic 
 happiness — the hallowed sanctuary, within whose walls she 
 had first heard the gospel of Christ, and beneath whose shadow 
 reposed the beloved remains of the husband of her youth. 
 "Overpowered by my feelings," she writes, "I allowed but a 
 glance at scenes so painfully dear, and was soon welcomed by 
 the afiectionate greetings of my children. Blessed be God, 
 the God of all my comforts, for His goodness and mercy to the 
 most unworthy of all His creatures. Assist me to bless and 
 praise His Holy name." Soothed by social intercourse with 
 the family of her eldest son, whose generous and afiectionate 
 consideration left nothing to desire that could contribute to her 
 comfort, and renovated in health by travel through diff'erent 
 parts of England and Scotland, after above four montlis' 
 pleasant sojourn she recrossed the Atlantic, and arrived at 
 New York under happier and brighter auspices than those 
 with which she first landed a saddened stranger upon its shores. 
 [80] 
 
RETURN TO AMERICA. 81 
 
 On her return to the United States she retired to a small 
 estate, wOiich she rented, on the banks of the majestic Hudson. 
 Here, favoured with an evangelical ministry, and in the enjoy- 
 ment of the communion of saints, she spent four years of con- 
 genial repose, revelling amidst the rich beauties of nature, for 
 which sJie possessed so exquisite a taste, and indulging in 
 those rural pursuits in which she always took particular de- 
 liglit. Of the many interesting letters dated from this roman- 
 tic spot, we can afford space but for one, as indicating the 
 supremo ascendancy which spiritual concerns still maintained 
 in her heart ; and as containing ' pleasant words ' for those 
 who are sincerely and honestly inquiring for the truth as it is 
 in Jesus. 
 
 " My dearest Mamma, — Mount Pleasant, 1823. 
 
 "... Glad was I to get dear 's letter ; and 
 
 though I grieve he is not rejoicing in the Lord, I am far from 
 being discouraged. He has life. A dead sinner never feels 
 that he is ungrateful to the best of Beings, that he is in the 
 * gall of bitterness,' or is afraid of being a hypocrite. The 
 Lord himself has commenced the work in his soul, and He will 
 carry it on ; not, perhaps, in our way, but in His own w^isdom, 
 until He accomplishes the thing He has put His hand to. I 
 would rather see him diving to the bottom of truth, for the 
 truth, than to take it up, as many do, on the ipse dixit of their 
 fellow-men ; and fancy they beheve the gospel because others 
 do whose opinions they respect, and in consequence of which 
 they are harassed with doubts and misgivings, and their use- 
 fulness impaired, all their journey through. If our gracious 
 
 Lord designs that should be called to labour in the dear 
 
 Redeemer's kingdom (a real, not a featlier-hed soldier). He will 
 bring him to plough deep for the truth, and perhaps bring him 
 through painful exercises too. Blessed be His adored name, 
 for the hope he causes my heart to feel on this subject. I 
 have had to pray, ' Anything, or any way, dearest Lord, so 
 that thou wilt convert his soul and bring him into thy blessed 
 service.' Thomas thought it was all imagination as it respected 
 the resurrection of Jesus, although his brethren declared they 
 had seen Him, till compelled by a view of Christ himself to 
 exclaim. My Lord and my God ! Paul, too, hated the name 
 of Jesus, and thought it a made up story to deceive, until Jesus 
 met him in the way. And I have often remarked that some 
 4* 
 
82 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 of the most eminently useful ministers of the cross have been 
 extricated, by the all-powerful arm of the Redeemer, from the 
 very hotbed of unbelief I do not expect that this work in 
 his soul will be done in a few days, or weeks, or perhaps 
 years ; but that it will be done, I have little doubt, and bless 
 the Lord for his abundant goodness to him and to me. If you 
 see Mr. , inquire how the revival at New Haven pro- 
 ceeds, and how Mr. Bethune's son holds out." 
 
 The return of Mrs. Winslow to America, and her removal 
 from the banks of the Hudson to a permanent residence in 
 New York, formed one of the most interesting epochs in the 
 history of her sojourn in that land. We refer to an especial 
 and remarkable season of Divine grace with which God vis- 
 ited her domestic circle, imparting a quickened impulse to her 
 own spiritual feelings, and resulting in the accession of three 
 of her children to the ranks and service of Christ. The exist- 
 ence of that striking peculiarity in the history of the transat- 
 lantic churches, — Religious Revival, — is now a fact generally 
 well known. There are few intelligent Christians of any 
 clime, who have not heard, and, perhaps, it might be added, to 
 whom in some degree the influence has not extended, of those 
 especial and remarkable baptisms of the Spirit with which the 
 Great Head of the church from time to time visits the 
 churches in America. It comes not within the scope of the 
 present volume to explain the theory of this wonderful phe- 
 nomenon ; all that we can allow ourselves to do is to bear a 
 lowly testimony to the fact of its existence. The ecclesiastical 
 historian, as he traces at some future period — w^hen their na- 
 ture is better understood, and their influence better known — 
 the origin, progress, and results of these extraordinary seasons 
 of religious excitement, will probably date their commence- 
 ment from the first settlement of the Pilgrim Fathers on those 
 western shores. It was not, therefore, remarkable, that New 
 England should have been the birthplace and the cradle of the 
 first religious awakening on that vast continent. The most 
 remarkable displays of Divine power, however, appeared in 
 the times and under the awakening ministry of the elder Ed- 
 wards — a man of colossal intellect, of seraphic piety, and of 
 childlike simplicity. Prom that period, embracing the labours 
 of Whitfield, the Tennants, Davies, Brainard, and other emi- 
 nent and holy divines, to the present time, America has been 
 the theatre of some of the most signal displays of the presence 
 
THE mothers' meeting. — HAPPY RESULTS. 83 
 
 and power of the Holy Ghost the church of God has ever 
 witnessed. We pause not to ask why it should be so. This 
 would lead us into too wide a range of inquiry — but so it is. 
 "We may, however, venture upon the remark, that the social 
 principle in America — though this may not elucidate the origin 
 of these sovereign manifestations of Divine grace — has been 
 found peculiarly favourable to the promotion of religious revi- 
 vals. Commencing with an individual, the sacred influence 
 has extended to a family, from thence to an entire congrega- 
 tion; the impulse thus given to religious feeling has widened 
 until a village, a town, and even a city, has been moved to its 
 centre on the stupendous concerns of eternity. Such have 
 often been the progress and the happy results of American 
 revivals. We turn our attention now to an illustration of 
 these interesting phenomena, more circumscribed, but not less 
 marked. 
 
 The domestic revival to which the following extracts refer 
 was preceded by the devotional meetings of an association of 
 Christian mothers, representing diflferent branches of the church 
 of Christ, who convened weekly for the purpose of especial and 
 united prayer for the Divine blessing upon their families. Mrs. 
 Winslow has often described those seasons as hallowed by an 
 extraordinary degree of the presence and anointing of the Holy 
 Ghost. Frequently has she been seen to return from them 
 with tearful eyes and a glowing countenance, to diffuse around 
 her home-circle the influence of her own solemn and heavenly 
 communings. The wrestling intercessions of this band of holy 
 women, of praying mothers — mighty in their weakness — soon 
 brought the blessing for which they pleaded. Over one fam- 
 ily, especially, the mercy-cloud gathered, unveiling its heaven- 
 sent treasure. Commencing with herself, the blessing ex- 
 tended to one and another, and yet another of her circle, until 
 there was not a room in her dwelling that resounded not with 
 the voice of prayer and praise. In the following extracts from 
 her family correspondence, written from New York, and at 
 diflferent intervals in the progress of the revival, she thus nar- 
 rates this good and wondrous work : — 
 
 "In the commencement of this year, before a revival even 
 was thought of, the Lord met with my soul, after some months 
 of comparative darkness and desertion, during which time I 
 felt like wrestling Israel ; for my spirit was in heaviness, and 
 I earnestly sought and felt after my absent Lord. At last He 
 
■84 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 appeared, and filled my heart with unspeakable joj. Like 
 Mary, I arose from the sepulchre, and hastened to tell the dis- 
 ciples that the Lord had risen upon me as the Sun of Righteous- 
 ness. My heart was enlarged, and my mouth was open to 
 speak good of His holy name ; not only in my own family, but 
 to others, exhorting them to ask and to expect great things, 
 for the Lord was at hand. I entreated them to arise out of 
 the spiritual lethargy they appeared to be in, and Jesus would 
 
 bless them as He had blessed me." 
 
 * * * % 
 
 "In what language can I express my gratitude to God for 
 all His abundant o-oodness to me and mine ? I am at a loss. 
 
 o 
 
 My cup, at times, overflows. Praise Him on my behalf, my 
 dear children, who know the value of this great salvation. 
 My children here are walking in the narrow road, and are 
 sweetly united in the tenderest bonds of Christian love. Not 
 one unconverted soul is under my roof All, all love the 
 
 Saviour. My house is a house of prayer." 
 
 * * * * 
 
 " The good work is still progressing. During this revival 
 my soul has felt its refreshing influence, and still continues to 
 experience a most precious unfolding of Christ's love. For 
 many years I have not felt anything like it. I see a fulness 
 in Jesus I hardly ever saw before. Bless the Lord, my 
 soul ! Several churches have partaken of this heavenly shower, 
 and I trust it will increase more and more. Many who love 
 the Lord are upon their watch-tower looking out for His ap- 
 proach. Oh, it is a refreshing season ! My own soul can 
 testify that Jesus is among us of a truth. It seems as if new 
 strength had been imparted to gird up the loins of my mind, 
 and to set out afresh to run the heavenly race. I can look 
 
 back and see with concern how I have loitered on my way." 
 
 * * 4t * 
 
 " This precious revival is still advancing. The Lord is 
 pouring out His Spirit in a way I never before saw or felt. 
 And what I now see and feel has tended to confirm my soul 
 more than ever in the reality of the religion of Jesus, and of 
 that eternal world to which we are fast approaching. There 
 is nothing like enthusiasm. I am quite inadequate to give you 
 any just idea of this most solemn and gracious work of God. 
 It is to me something like the day of Pentecost." 
 
 * * *^ * 
 
DOMESTIC REVIVAL. 85 
 
 " Everything under my roof seems to wear another aspect. 
 Old things have passed away, and all things have become new. 
 I can say of my children, ' Behold, Lord, they pray ! ' The 
 things of God open upon them with deep interest. The ways 
 of wisdom are pleasant, and everything not connected there- 
 with, tasteless. Oh, what has God, my God, wrought for His 
 unworthy handmaid ! Had He given me an earthly crown it 
 had been dross in comparison. It appears to me that the Lord 
 is about to do great things for our wricked world. He will 
 pour out His Spirit upon all flesh, as He has promised. Oh, 
 that you may feel that he is drawing nigh in your part of the 
 world ! Ask, and expect great things from Him. You can- 
 not ask too much when you ask in Jesus' name, and God can- 
 not give too much when He gives for Jesus' sake. How near 
 He has been to us ! You will hardly think I can speak too 
 much on this interesting subject, when it is said, the angels in 
 heaven rejoice over one sinner that repenteth. And here are 
 three to whom Jesus has given repentance and life under my 
 roof. If the angels rejoice in heaven, well may I rejoice on 
 
 earth," 
 
 * * * * 
 
 " And now my heart is going out after you all. The Lord's 
 arm of grace is not shortened but that it can extend across the 
 Atlantic. Who can tell but at this moment it has commenced 
 among you all ? I must pray on. Elisha was wroth against 
 the king of Israel because he smote on the ground thrice, and 
 stayed ; declaring that if he had smitten five or six times, his 
 enemies should have fallen before him. May I be enabled to 
 carry my unconverted children in the arms of faith to Jesus, 
 until He put His hand upon them and bless them. The re- 
 vival is still going on, not only here (New York), but also in 
 every part of America. In Philadelphia, and in many other 
 places, numbers, I am told, are inquiring their way to Zion. 
 It appears almost like the millennial day. Unitarianism, like 
 a pernicious weed, is spreading in Boston; but lately they 
 have had a more extensive revival than we have had here. 
 This has been a year of wonders ; thousands have been born 
 into the kingdom of our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ. 
 These are glorious manifestations that Jesus lives, and is ac- 
 complishing all His gracious purposes, and will bring His 
 people into a wealthy place at last. How has my faith been 
 strengthened, and my soul established in the truth, from what 
 
86 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 I have seen of His power and grace beneath my own roof, 
 and from what I have experienced in my own soul ! Oh, may 
 He extend His arm of mercy to you all ! ' I do look for it, 
 and am ready to say, ' I cannot let Thee go until Thou bless 
 me in the conversion of all, alV As it respects myself, my joy 
 is settled down into a stable peace, and increasing confidence 
 in the dear Redeemer. I feel a throne of grace very precious, 
 and the name of the Lord a tower of strength. It appears to 
 me that I was to have travail of soul for these children, and a 
 deeper work in my own. I am still utter weakness in myself, 
 but am enabled to keep a more steadfast eye upon Jesus." 
 
 Such is the prevailing power with God of a praying and 
 believing mother. Let the Christian parent, anxious and 
 earnest for the spiritual and eternal wellbeing of her children, 
 take encouragement from the preceding narrative, and give 
 herself to prayer for the outpouring of the Spirit upon her 
 family. Taking hold of His word, let her remind God of His 
 promise, — " I will pour my Spirit upon thy seed, and my bless- 
 ing upon thine offspring ; " and thus travailing in birth a 
 second time in the energy of faith, and in the wrestling of 
 prayer, it will be the joy of her heart to behold Christ formed 
 within them the hope of glory. 
 
 And why are not Revivals of religion more frequent in this 
 land ? Why have we not those special baptisms of the Spirit, 
 for which the churches in America are so distinguished ? That 
 we are not entirely without manifest tokens of the Spirit's 
 presence, we thankfully acknowledge. In the absence of the 
 showers^ we have the continual dew of the Spirit. But are we 
 not justified in expecting more than this — even the Gut2Muri?ig 
 of the Spirit ? Is not the Spirit the property of the universal 
 church ? Is not the present emphatically the dispensation of 
 the Spirit ? Have we not the prediction and the promise of 
 His large bestowment in these last days ? And is not Christ 
 enthroned in heaven, having received the promise of the 
 Father, prepared to rain down righteousness upon His church ? 
 Why, then, have we not the blessing ? Some observations of 
 Mrs. Winslow, on the power of prayer and faith, gleaned from 
 "Thoughts" recorded in her Journal, may probably supply an 
 answer : — 
 
 " Lord, revive us in the midst of the years ! How is it 
 that we have no precious revivals here, and that the all-impor- 
 tant subject lies with so little weight upon our hearts ? It is 
 
THOUGHTS ON THE POWER OF PRAYER. 87 
 
 because we do not believe the matter-of-fact, altliougli God has 
 promised, and declared the truth. When Christ had risen, 
 and some were eye-witnesses of the fact, yet when they de- 
 clared the blessed truth to the rest, they were as those that 
 mocked. We testify that these things are so, for we have 
 seen and felt them ourselves. Our hearts have burned within 
 us, and our souls have been refreshed as with new wine from 
 the kingdom. The doors have been shut about us, and Jesus 
 has been in our midst within, blessing, reviving, and refresh- 
 ing us— giving life to the dead, and speaking comforting words 
 to His saints. It has been the mighty work of an Almighty 
 God, manifesting His power, and displaying His love. 
 
 " Oh, the mighty power of prayer ! Even the best of Chris- 
 tians know but little what it really is. The apostle felt the 
 truth, when he exhorted the saints to pray toithout ceasing. 
 Christian, are you in trouble? — call upon the name of the 
 Lord, and He will deliver. This poor man cried^ and the Lord 
 heard him^ and saved him out of all his troubles. His ear is 
 ever open to the cry of His people, and His arm outstretched 
 on their behalf. His aim is ever to make you happy in Him- 
 self, and happy throughout eternity. Make Him your con- 
 fidant ; entrust Him with all your secrets. Let Christ be your 
 friend, and you need no other. All hearts are at his disposal ; 
 and if a man's ways please the Lord He maketh even his enemies 
 to be at peace with him. Are you poor and needy ? Go to 
 Christ for all you need. Satan may suggest that these are 
 carnal things. But did not the Lord send His servant to the 
 widow, to be fed for many days? and did the barrel of meal 
 waste, or the cruse of oil fail ? Did He not send a celestial 
 messenger to prepare Elijah's breakfast while he slept ? And 
 is He not the same now? Go, then, to Christ for all you 
 need. 
 
 " Faith is the gift of God, and it is a working agent in the 
 soul of the believer. It has to do with God, and with Him 
 only. It takes hold of His faithfulness, who cannot deny Him- 
 self. Simple faith honours God, and God honours simple faith. 
 True faith works in the dark as in the light. It cannot fail, 
 but will always come off triumphant. And what is faith? 
 It is simply believing what God has said — taking Him at His 
 word. Faith tries God, and God tries the faith He gives. 
 Little faith brings home but little. Be it unto you according to 
 your faith. Seek much for this Divine grace. It is for you 
 
88 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 treasured up in Christ. Look not for it in yourself. It grows 
 in its native soil. It is in Christ Jesus' rich treasure-house. 
 It is of heavenly origin, and leads the soul to the source from 
 whence it came. Only believe. Trust Him, ye tried and 
 empty saints, and you shall rejoice in the goodness and tender 
 mercies of your faithful and unchanging God. I may also re- 
 mark, that nothing tests or strengthens faith so much as the 
 trying dispensations of God towards His peopk. The furnace 
 destroys everything but the pure gold. Nothing but real 
 faith can endure the heat of the fiery crucible, and, what is 
 strange, it grows in the fire." 
 
 CoupUng, then, these cognate graces, — prayer and faith, — 
 let the churches of Christ prove God now herewith, if He will 
 not open the windows of Heaven, and pour out a blessing, that 
 there shall not be room enough to receive it. 
 
 The following touching reminiscences, from her own pen, of 
 a period in her history, thus rapidly traversed, may form a 
 befitting close to this chapter of the work. As a personal 
 communication, and unveiling thoughts and feelings most 
 sacred to a mother's heart, some hesitation has been felt in in- 
 troducing it ; but the conviction that it beautifully illustrates 
 her character as a Christian parent, while it bears a noble 
 testimony to the faithfulness of a pray er-h earing God, has 
 pleaded against private feelings. It is addressed to one of her 
 sons : — 
 
 " Before I rose this morning, I was led to take a review of 
 the Lord's dealings with you and me. I could not but see and 
 feel that you have been a child of many prayers, and that God 
 has turned a listening ear to the voice of my supplications for 
 you. A few months before your birth, the Lord met with my 
 soul, and most blessedly drew me to Himself, making Himself 
 known to me as my Saviour and my God. I bore you during 
 this sweet season of my espousal to Christ. It was the time 
 of my ^ first love.' The first spark of divine life I then received. 
 After your birth, I was brought to the verge of eternity ; for 
 nearly twenty-four hours there was hardly a hair's-breadth be- 
 tween me and death. The physicians concealed my danger ; 
 but God did for me what no human skill could do, and I was 
 spared, — snatched as from the grave. When you were about 
 five years old, I took you into the country for your liealth ; 
 and there, through the mistake of the nurse, who brouglit me 
 a wrong medicine, I administered to you a powder, 'sufficient,' 
 
TOUCHING REMINISCENCES. 89 
 
 the doctors said, ' to have killed ten men.' At the moment of 
 the dreadful discovery, these words of a beautiful hymn were 
 brought to my mind — 
 
 ' In all thy troubles sharp and strong, 
 My soul, to Jesus fly.' 
 
 I did so. He heard my prayer. The physicians said that you 
 must die. The Lord said, ' He shall not die, but live.' He 
 answered prayer, and gave you back to me. They afterwards 
 said it was a miracle. During the time of that gracious revival, 
 how did I pray that He would meet with your soul. He did 
 so. He knows, and He only, how I wrestled for your full 
 conversion. I wanted a clear proof of a new birth in Christ. 
 He answered my prayer, and gave you once more to me as 
 from the dead, — a hving child, born again of the Spirit. . . . 
 Oh, it is good to look back, and trace His dealings and His 
 wondrous works to the children of men ! Taking thus a re- 
 view of these gracious things, under the teaching of the Eter- 
 nal Spirit, so far from being puffed up, they will lay us low in 
 the dust under a sense of our base ingratitude towards Him, 
 and the wretched returns we have made for such distinguish- 
 ing mercies. Oh, that He might keep you humble, and give 
 you such views of your own heart as will cause you to feel as 
 well as confess, that you are less than the least of all saints. 
 This is my prayer for you, and myself too. A mother's 
 prayers have been your swaddhng-clothes from your birth. 
 Do you pray for me ? I am sure you do." 
 
CHAPTER VI. 
 
 In 1828, a few months following the interesting events re- 
 corded in the preceding chapter, again prostrated in strength 
 by the excessive heat of an almost tropical climate, and, per- 
 haps, scarcely less so by the extreme mental excitement 
 through which she had just passed, she found it necessary to 
 make a second voyage to England, for the purpose of recruit- 
 ing her health. In contemplating this step, she thus writes to 
 her family : — 
 
 " I am not quite certain but that, with God's blessing, you 
 may see me in the autumn. If I come, you must be prepared 
 to find me much altered in appearance. I suppose you will 
 hardly know your weather-beaten mother. But I think the 
 change of climate would soon recruit my health, with the 
 Lord's blessing. But I am growing old, and nothing can re- 
 pair the ravages of years, I do earnestly pray, if the Lord do 
 not go with me. He will not suffer me to go hence. I long to 
 see all my children, but I desire to wait patiently the Lord's 
 time. My times are in His hands. Oh, that He may direct 
 my steps !" 
 
 After a perilous passage, but marked by especial mercy, she 
 arrived at Liverpool in safety ; spent a few months with her 
 eldest son in the country, and thence took up her residence in 
 London. Anxious for the holy walk, and growth in the divine 
 life, of those of her family she had left in America, she had 
 scarcely touched the shores of England when she addressed to 
 them the following earnest epistle. We have no heart to 
 abridge a document so strikingly illustrative of the spirituality 
 of her mind and the practical character of her Christianity, and 
 so replete with useful sentiments : — 
 
 " My dearest Children, — July, 1828. 
 
 " , . . . And now that I have given you an account 
 of the goodness of God in bringing me throus:h so many dan- 
 [90] 
 
EARNEST LETTER TO HER CHILDREN. 91 
 
 gers, and in the midst of my dear family on this side of the 
 water, let me turn to your best interests. I have left you, my 
 beloved children, (still more beloved, because you belong to 
 Christ,) in the place of your spiritual birth. / have left you, 
 but God is with you. Keep close to Jesus. Forget not my 
 old exhortation, Pray without ceasing. Go to Him for all you 
 need ; lean upon Him. There is a fulness in Christ, treasured 
 up for you, that the highest angel in heaven cannot fathom. 
 Tell Him all that is in your heart. Lay your case before Him 
 as if He did not already know it. This is the sweet simplicity 
 of faith that Christ loves. You cannot come too often. Bring 
 to Him your little cares as well as your great ones. If any- 
 thing is a trouble to you, however small it may be, you are 
 warranted, nay, commanded, to take it to Him, and thereby 
 you glorify His name. / will also leave in the midst of thee an 
 affiicted and poor people^ and they shall trust in the name of the 
 Lord. Pray much for a tender conscience, a conscience sus- 
 ceptible of the least sin, — as susceptible as the eye to the touch ; 
 and never rest if you feel guilt there, however small, until it is 
 removed by a fresh application of the precious blood of Christ. 
 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and Just to forgive us our 
 sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. Wherever you 
 are, at home or by the wayside, lift up your heart to that pre- 
 cious Saviour who has manifested so much love to your souls. 
 Never be afraid to come to Him. Satan will tempt you here ; 
 but beware of his suggestions. He would keep you from 
 Christ ; but Christ is as needful for you, every step you 
 take to glory, as when you were overwhelmed with sorrow, 
 under a sense of your awful state as a sinner before God. 
 Never look within for comfort ; you will find nothing there 
 but what is calculated to humble you. But look to Jesus. 
 There is everything in Him to encourage you in your warfare. 
 And yet it is needful that you examine your own hearts from 
 day to day, that you may be well acquainted with all your 
 spiritual diseases, and forget not that Christ is your Physician. 
 He has undertaken for your cure, and to fit you, by the in- 
 dwelling of His Spirit, for the inheritance He has prepared for 
 you. Oh, live upon Him out of yourselves. You need fear 
 nothing but sin, nor even that with a slavish fear, but with a 
 godly, filial fear. Avoid trifling, lukewarm professors. They 
 are the bane of the church of Christ. If you can do them no 
 good, they will do you much harm. One thing I would espe- 
 3* 
 
92 MEMOIR OF MRS, MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 cially remind you of; in all your difficulties and trials, (for 
 many you will have,) go not first to an arm of flesh, nor sit 
 and ponder what you shall do ; but go directly to your dear 
 Saviour, and ask earnestly for wisdom and grace to guide you 
 through them ; watch the leadings and openings of His gra- 
 cious providence, and follow on as He leads the way, and He 
 will make even these things to work for your good. If you 
 feel your want of faith, ask this of Him, that you may come in 
 faith ; for this is as much His gift, as the blessing you want. 
 Your wives are professors of the same blessed hope. 
 But, the husband is the head of the luife^ even as Christ is the 
 head of the church ; and they will look to you for an example. 
 Walk before them circumspectly ; pray with them, and pray 
 for them, and allow nothing to interrupt family worship. May 
 God give you wisdom in all things. I thought, when you 
 were brought to the knowledge of the truth, my care for you 
 would be over; but I feel as anxious now that you should walk 
 worthy of His blessed name, as I was before that your souls 
 might be saved. Remember that your strength is perfect 
 weakness, and yet with Christ's strength you can do all things. 
 Again, I repeat, live upon Him. Aim to glorify Him in all 
 things, and to possess an abiding sense of the indwelling of the 
 Holy Spirit, that your thoughts, desires, and affections may 
 soar to heavenly and eternal objects. If you lose this, you 
 cannot walk comfortably. Cast your cares, as they arise, upon 
 Him who careth for you. Do not covet riches : pray against 
 this more or less easily besetting sin of many of God's people. 
 Forget not the exhortation. Be content with such things as ye 
 have. Keep close to Jesus ; for if you walk at a distance, you 
 have need to fear the rod : nevertheless. His loving-kindness 
 He will not take from you. He loves while He chastens. A 
 few more years, and we shall have done with all things here 
 below, and eternity, with all its glorious realities, will burst 
 upon your view. Oh, then, live for eternity. Think much of 
 your blessed inheritance there, and let the glory of God be 
 dearer to you than your own lives. Follow on to know more 
 of Him. Be very thankful for what he has already done, but 
 press on for more. Be not satisfied with a little, when He has 
 such immense riches to bestow. 0/jeri thy mouth wide, and I 
 will fill it. Above all, before I close, — and do bear with me, 
 for my heart is very full, and you are doubly dear to me, since 
 you belong to Christ, my beloved children — never, never omit 
 
EARNEST LETTER TO HER CHILDREN. 93 
 
 secret prayer. I take shame to myself that I have not spoken 
 of this before. Remember, the first departures from Christ 
 begin at the closet, or rather in the heart ; and then private 
 prayer is either hurried over, becomes a mere form, or is en- 
 tirely neglected. My dear children, grieve not the Spirit; 
 and whenever you feel a desire to pray, that moment lift up 
 your heart to Him who is always near you. I can truly say, 
 
 ' Sweet the moments, rich in blessing. 
 Which before the cross 1 spend. ' 
 
 How often do I leave the family circle, when one or the other 
 of you is pressing on my mind — passing, perhaps, through 
 some trial, or beguiled by some temptation ; I retire to my 
 room, close the door, and fall upon my knees, plead for you 
 with many tears, and commend you again and again to Him 
 who has promised to carry the lambs in his arms. I wish to 
 caution you against a great evil in many churches ; I allude to 
 gossiping professors, who, when they meet, instead of talking 
 of Christ, talk about almost everything else, — ' busy bodies,' 
 who go from house to house, speaking things which they ought 
 not. Oh, what a dishonour are such to the cause of the dear 
 Redeemer ! Rebuke such in gentleness of spirit, and withdraw 
 from them. Pray that your own minds might be duly solem- 
 nized with the weight and importance of eternal things, and 
 that your conversation might have a savour of the gospel at 
 all times, for your own comfort, and for the edification of 
 others. As ye have received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk ye 
 in Him. Pray and watch against a light and trifling spirit in 
 yourselves, and go nowhere where it is Hkely to be called forth. 
 Remember that God has to do with the heart. To this man 
 ivill I look, even to him that is poor and of a contrite spirit. 
 Humility is one of the sweetest graces of God's Spirit. Ear- 
 nestly seek to know as much of your own hearts as will keep 
 you sitting at the foot of the cross ; and at the same time to 
 know as much of Christ's heart as will enable you to rejoice in 
 the fulness and sufficiency there is in Him. May God keep 
 you, guide and instruct you, in every good word and work, 
 and carry you in His tender bosom, are my unceasing prayers, 
 night and day." 
 
 It may be proper that we should now introduce the reader 
 to the more private and sacred records of her hidden life. 
 The journals from which we ouote were visible to no other 
 
m MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 eye than her own ; and were kept by her but as way-marks 
 of her rehgious progress, and as memorials of God's gracious 
 and providential deahngs in her personal history. Her lowly 
 spirit cannot now be wounded by their publication; while 
 their embodiment in this work will, perhaps, more than anything 
 else, illustrate the close transactions of her soul with God. 
 The essence of real religion is intimacy with God. The di- 
 vine life in the soul will ascend to the source from whence it 
 came. And that record, which reveals to us the sacred mys- 
 teries of this holy life, which throws a ray upon its intricacies, 
 and shows us how, like Enoch and Noah, we too may " walk 
 with God," must be of inestimable value to the Christian 
 church. In the extracts we are about to make, we trace the 
 experience of one who dealt faithfully with her own soul, and 
 honestly with God. She set the Lord always before her. 
 With an eye intent upon her path, yet ever looking to, and 
 resting upon Him, she sought so to shape her course as to 
 please God in all things. She lived as constantly " beholding 
 the Invisible," and felt that she had alone to do with Him. 
 
 In the course of her diary, a name frequently occurs, em- 
 balmed in the memory of many who will read these pages. 
 It was a kind Providence that gently led her steps, soon after 
 her arrival in England, to the chapel of the late Rev. James 
 Harington Evans. But recently returned from the hallowed 
 scenes her letters have so glowingly described, her heart was 
 fully prepared warmly to sympathize with a ministry, the pe- 
 culiar excellence and winning charm of which was the power 
 of the Holy Ghost, with which the Saviour was exalted. On 
 the first occasion of her appearance within this sanctuary, the 
 Lord especially met with her soul, — first in the spiritual, fer- 
 vent prayer, and then, more manifestly, through the powerful 
 message of His truth. 
 
 We now introduce the reader to the more private expe- 
 rience of the subject of this Memoir, as recorded from time to 
 time during 1828 and 1829:— 
 
 " London, July 10th, 1828. — Had nearness to God this 
 morning, and an earnest desire to resign myself, my children, 
 and all, into His blessed hands, and to know no will but His. 
 We are reading regularly through the Bible. The 12th of 
 Exodus was the chapter of the day. Oh, that I and all my 
 household might feed continually upon the precious Lamb of 
 God • and with the bitter herbs of unfeigned repentance may 
 
DIARY. 95 
 
 ■we eat thereof, witli our loins girded about with truth, and 
 our hearts and faces towards the heavenly Canaan ! Prayed. 
 Oh, for more of the spirit of prayer ! Lord, pour it down 
 upon us, for Jesus' sake ! Poor old Mrs. D. came. I must 
 obtain a pension for her soon, or she will be removed, before 
 she gets it, to a better pension above,* She appears ill, but 
 contented, though in a workhouse. God has, I trust, pre- 
 pared her for a home not made with hands, eternal in the 
 heavens. How many such hidden ones has our dear Jesus in 
 this vale of tears ! Although overlooked by the rich and 
 mighty. His eye sees them, His heart pities them, and He is 
 meetening them, by all His dispensations, for the glorious in- 
 heritance He has prepared for them above. What a change, 
 from a body of sin and death — from the privations of a work- 
 house — to the heavenly abode and presence of Jesus !" 
 
 " 12th. — Read this morning the 14th of Exodus, detailing 
 the many trials of faith in the history of Israel of old. They 
 were commanded to ' stand still, and see the salvation of the 
 Lord,' Hedged in on every side, what could they do but 
 stand still, until the Lord opened a way for them ? My way, 
 too, is hedged up just now. May I be able to trust in the 
 Lord, and never be left to murmur or repine, but to wait and 
 see the salvation of my God ! Lord, let me see the pillar of 
 cloud by day, and the pillar of fire by night. Not one step 
 can I take without Thee. My soul is much exercised. Un- 
 dertake, O Lord, for thy widowed handmaid 1 I can truly 
 say. To whom can I go but unto Thee ? I never fail to find, 
 that trials drive me closer to Christ, and quicken me in the ex- 
 ercise of prayer. Oh, how is it that I do so constantly need 
 the rod?" 
 
 " 13th. — I awoke in the night, and a care, something like a 
 trial in prospect, presented itself to my mind. I could not 
 sleep until I laid it before the Lord ; for, to whom can I go 
 in all my troubles and difficulties, but to Him who is a Father 
 to the fatherless, and the widow's God ? Almost directly 
 afterwards I fell asleep. I had unburdened myself to Him 
 who has all hearts in his hands ; and my mind was at peace. 
 Oh, what a privilege is this ! How remarkably precious is a 
 throne of grace to a tried, tempted Christian at all times I 
 Had a sweet opportunity this morning, and much liberty. 
 
 * This pension was secured. 
 
96 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 Could unhesitatingly say, ' Abba, Father ! ' and lay before 
 Him all that was in my heart, believing he heard me." 
 
 " 14th. — Intended to have gone to Hampstead, but the rain 
 prevented. I desire to acknowledge the hand of God even in 
 a shower of rain. I was not to go. Felt a wandering of 
 mind while engaged in prayer for a moment, and in the whole 
 exercise a want of fervour. It was not a heart-searching, 
 melting season, such as I am sometimes favoured with. Oh, 
 how good is God to permit such a one to approach Him ! " 
 
 " 15th. — The Lord orders aU things. I desire to keep a 
 steadfast eye upon Him. How much I felt to-day, my 
 prayers needed to be prayed over and to be repented of. 
 What need have we of a merciful High Priest, who can be 
 touched with a feeling sense of our infirmities! Precious 
 Jesus ! let me feel my dependence upon Thee more and 
 more." 
 
 " 20th. Sabbath. — Illness has kept me from the house of 
 God to-day. I have felt very insensible, although I have so 
 much cause for thankfulness and gratitude. The Lord has 
 heard my prayer, and graciously answered my petition, in 
 spite of unbelief and ingratitude on my part. He has turned 
 away the evil I feared, and made this hard thing easy, and 
 this crooked path straight. Blessed be His ever-adored name. 
 In those things that troubled me, I sought the Lord. My 
 petitions were graciously answered. May I never forget the 
 least of His benefits ! I am surrounded with innumerable 
 blessings. My children round me, the sweet privilege of the 
 gospel at hand, when able to attend, and no bodily pain of 
 any consequence. Bless the Lord, my soul ! " 
 
 "23rd. — Had a most comfortable assurance, both last night 
 and this morning, of my interest in a crucified, risen Saviour, 
 and found I could tell Him all that was in my heart. I am a 
 poor, wanting creature ; always coming for a fresh supply. 
 But oh, what cause for thankfulness it is an ever-flowing, 
 overflowing fountain to which I come ! I have much comfort 
 in commending my children, the dear lambs of Christ's flock, 
 to the especial care of the dear Shepherd. Lord, keep them 
 as the apple of Thine eye ; and may those who are waiting 
 for, and expecting their halting, be ashamed and confounded 
 when they see that Christ is in them of a truth." 
 
 " 26th. — Awoke with distressing thoughts of . As 
 
 soon as I was up, I dropped upon my knees before the Lord ; 
 
DIARY. 97 
 
 and without preparing my mind for prayer, as some are ena- 
 bled to do, I brought my want directly before Him. My 
 heart was troubled, and I told it to the Lord. I did plead 
 with many tears, that as He had given me His Son to die for 
 me, He would not withhold the lesser blessing, and impart to 
 
 all that grace he so much needed to preserve him from 
 
 the ten thousand snares Satan would lay for his unguarded 
 feet. This is the only way I can get on. When trials press 
 upon my mind, I must arise and carry them to God. To 
 whom else can I go ? I would not often tell the dearest friend 
 in the world what passes in my mind ; but I can disclose it all 
 to Jesus ! I can and do unbosom myself to Him whose com- 
 passions fail not, and who remembers I am but dust ; yet pities 
 and loves me better than I love myself. Had much more com- 
 fort and openness in prayer in the family last night. Felt the 
 Lord very near, and eternal things all-important." 
 
 "August 2nd. — Yesterday was dear 's birthday. I 
 
 felt happy at the birth of my son, but that happiness was tri- 
 fling, although all that a fond mother could feel, in comparison 
 of what my heart experienced at the hour of his spiritual 
 birth. I truly did travail with him a second time, that Christ 
 might be revealed within him the hope of glory. Oh, the 
 gladness of that interesting moment ! Angels united in a 
 mother's joy. The church below, the church above, — all, all 
 rejoiced ; and Christ was well pleased to see the travail of His 
 soul. May He who then made Himself known to him as his 
 Redeemer, be graciously pleased to pour into his heart the rich 
 blessing of His grace, and fit and qualify him for great useful- 
 ness in His blessed cause. Give him, O Lord, humbleness of 
 spirit, and stamp Thine image deep within his inmost soul." 
 
 "I increasingly feel that this is not my rest; it is polluted. 
 Go where he may, rest where he will, trials and crosses await 
 the Christian. Oh for faith — a constant, abiding faith, that 
 keeps a steady eye within the veil, where our tempted, tried, 
 and afflicted Saviour, now triumphant Conqueror, is seated, and 
 ever lives to make intercession for His dear people, who are 
 following his footsteps ! What a sore trial is the working of 
 pride within the heart ! I have had to conflict with this enemy 
 of late, which I had almost thought was quite gone. Heard 
 an excellent sermon from the Lord's sent servant, Mr. Evans, 
 from the words. Tell me, thou lohoyn my soul loveth, where 
 thou feedest, &c. He was, as usual^ most sweetly experimerx-. 
 5 
 
98 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 tal. It was chiefly to the cliurch, though he forgot not to ad- 
 dress sinners." 
 
 " Have had mucli exercise of mind, and deep searchings of 
 heart. Some new lesson in the school of Christ is daily, nay, 
 hourly, to be learned ; some hidden evil to be felt ; some new 
 enemy to be encountered ; some fresh, precious views of Jesus 
 to be obtained. Oh, how lovely, how good — exceeding good 
 — is Jesus Christ to unworthy me ! He is enough to satisfy 
 my soul. When disappointed in the creature, and I turn with 
 a sickening feeling from the world to Christ, I find here no dis- 
 appointment; here is fulness of joy, an ocean of love, a heart 
 to feel and sympathize, an eye to pity, and a power, an infinite 
 power, to sup-ply all my wants, to comfort my drooping spirits, 
 to refresh my fainting heart, and fill me with joy and peace in 
 believing. Jesus is an all-satisfying portion, and He is thy 
 portion, my soul." 
 
 " Had an interview yesterday with Mr. Evans. I pray the 
 Lord to bless it. In the evening went where I need not have 
 gone, and found the conversation of some professing Christians 
 a great snare to my soul. Have need to pray, O Lord, not 
 only lead me not into temptation, but hedge up my way, 
 though with thorns and briers, that I go not into it. Oh, the 
 sad levity and trifling of some, even of the ministers of Christ! 
 I am aware of the same evil in myself, and by these things lay 
 up material for bitter repentance. On my return home, had to 
 go to the Lord for fresh pardon, humbled in the dust. But 
 for ever blessed and adored be His name, to me He is love. I 
 feel to-day a sweet tenderness of spirit ; and while reading in 
 the family, my heart was drawn out by faith to Christ, and 
 could not but speak of Him to my children." 
 
 " Mr. , a professed minister of the gospel, has been here, 
 
 and has just left with to see . I wonder what busi- 
 ness a man, declaring himself sent of God to lead poor sinners 
 to Christ, has to do with the sights and shows of this perish- 
 ing world ! How can he exhort his flock to live above the 
 world and all its vanities, while he himself is going after them ? 
 
 As good Mr. says, it is our duty to have our eyes shut 
 
 and our ears stopped to everything that is not a step in that 
 ladder that reaches from earth to heaven. I cannot under- 
 stand some Christians, and they do not understand me. I 
 may be wrong ; but when I read. Come out from among them, 
 and be ye separate; Love not the world, nor the things that are 
 
DIARY. 99 
 
 in the world, and many other such solemn exhortations, with 
 so many exceeding great and precious promises to the over- 
 coming Christian, I am satisfied of the way a behever in Christ 
 should walk, and have only to regret I so often wander from 
 it myself. Dear Saviour, keep me near, very near, thy bless- 
 ed self. Shelter me under thine almighty, protecting wing, 
 till the storm of life is past. And oh, in infinite mercy remem- 
 ber the dear lambs of the flock, and suffer them not to wander 
 from Thee. Let them feel their ow^n weakness, and take hold 
 of Thy strength." 
 
 " Feeble in body, but very happy in the Lord, a sweet, con- 
 tented, childlike spirit, looking upward and feeling, as well as 
 knowing, God is good. His name to my soul is Love. Had 
 a delightful open view, as it were, while engaged in family 
 prayer, of the glorious work of the all-sufficient atonement 
 and sacrifice of the Son of God. Tears flowed while I 
 thanked my God, and my children's God, for this most pre- 
 cious covenant of grace, for my interest in it, and the sweet 
 assurance I have that some of them are also interested therein. 
 Blessed, for ever blessed, be His most precious name. I am 
 not well, and this tabernacle seems daily to decay. Be it so ; 
 it shall be raised again at the last day, fashioned like unto His 
 glorious body. Christ's owm resurrection is the earnest given, 
 and I know that my Redeemer liveth to fulfil His engagement; 
 My soul rejoiceth in Christ my Saviour. Often the enemy 
 whispers to me, when I feel a holy nearness to Jesus, and my 
 soul is very happy, that some trial is near at hand. Lord, I 
 desire to trust in Thee, in whom is all my hope and my salva- 
 tion. My children are Thy children. Blessed be Thy name 
 for that. Help me to say, * Thy will, not mine, be done.' I 
 cannot do this wdthout the especial influence of Thy Spirit." 
 
 "Sept. 1st. — Took possession of my pew yesterday at John- 
 street. May the Lord, in His rich mercy, make this step a 
 blessing to me and to my children. The steps of a good man 
 are ordered hy the Lord. Had to contend, while in the house 
 of God, with a wandering spirit ; felt it impossible to keep my 
 mind stayed upon the precious truths I heard, or attempted 
 to hear. Oh, how the w^orld, with all its cares, crow^ds upon 
 the poor pilgrim, even in his most solemn moments ! He 
 would fain say. Abide thee here^ and I will go yonder and wor- 
 ship. What a mercy that we have a faithful High Priest at 
 the right hand of the Majesty on high, to make intercession 
 
ICO MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 for all — all our manifold short-comings, sins and transgres- 
 sions." 
 
 " Rev. Mr. W called this morning, and mentioned that 
 
 after an unsuccessful attempt to obtain a curacy, he received a 
 letter from his wife, saying, that she had discovered that a 
 confidential servant had robbed them, and that she had deter- 
 mined to dismiss her. Mr. W wrote to say that she had 
 
 better keep her for the present, as his circumstances were too 
 straitened to pay her the wages due to her. A few days after, 
 he returned home, and found his family much tried by the 
 girl, who had refused to remain, and had gone to a neighbour's, 
 alleging as a reason for her leaving, that she would'not be paid 
 for her services. In addition to this trial, a bill from a trades- 
 man was sent in, demanding immediate payment. They had 
 
 no money. Mr. W felt his character as a minister was 
 
 at stake in a village, where everything was soon known from 
 house to house. In this dilemma and distress, they knelt 
 down and laid their case before the Lord. In the morning the 
 postman brought a letter. On opening it, it was found to con- 
 tain a ten-pound note in a blank cover. This paid all demands, 
 and left a surplus on hand. Oh, that men would praise the 
 Lord for his goodness to the children of m.en ! He came to 
 relate to me this remarkable providence. My heart felt re- 
 freshed, and my faith strengthened, by this sweet manifestation 
 of God's kind remembrance of His poor servant. It is good 
 to walk by faith ; to feel dependent for all, and to come to 
 Him as little children for all we need." 
 
 " Sept. 5th. — Find that many of my difficulties and trials — 
 I dare not call them afflictions — arise from quarters where one 
 least expected them. O Lord, help me more and more to 
 cease from man, whose breath is in his nostrils, and to expect 
 nothing but evil from an evil world ! But these are but little 
 trials after all. They do not wring the heart ; they may 
 grieve and wound, but nothing more. I think I know what 
 afflictions are — yea, the deep waters of affliction too. Bereav- 
 ing providences — the joy of my heart, the companion of my 
 youth, the father of my children, cut down as with a stroke ! 
 Dwelling in a strange land, surrounded by a helpless young 
 family, bereft of fortune when most wanted — the enemy suf- 
 fered to buffet my almost defenceless soul, the very foundations 
 of my faith trembling beneath this flood of tribulation — these 
 are afflictions 1 I was in the furnace, but the Lord stood by. 
 
DIARY. 101 
 
 Since then I have been enabled, upon my knees, amidst floods 
 of grateful tears, to thank Him for those very afflictions that I 
 then thought would bring me to nothing." 
 
 " 8th. — Have much cause to be humbled. Why does every 
 little disappointment affect me so much ? I feel truly I am a 
 sinful creature, unable of myself to think a good thought. 
 Never, never did sin appear so hateful, and my own nothing- 
 ness so great, as yesterday at the table of the Lord. Felt 
 something of a broken heart. I wept much, but still my hope 
 was in the Lord, and did look up, like the wounded Israelites, 
 to the cross of Christ. Lord, my help is alone from Thee. 
 Strengthen me with might in the inner man, and let not my 
 enemies prevail against me. Oh, the hidden evil of the heart, 
 unknown and unfelt, until the Spirit of Christ sees fit to reveal 
 the depths of iniquity that are there. It is a sickening view ; 
 and were it not that Christ Jesus came into the world to save 
 sinners, I should lie down in utter despair." 
 
 " 18th. — How has my heart been pained to-day from what 
 it has felt of evil within ! How much I often discover con- 
 trary to the Holy Spirit of Christ ! To-day has been one of 
 sore conflict — the spirit lusting against the flesh, and the flesh 
 lusting against the spirit ; so that I have been obliged again 
 and again to cry to the Lord for help from on high. Nothing 
 but the precious blood of Christ can wash this guilt away. 
 How soon was I ruffled to-day ; and now could weep, yea, and 
 do weep, and shall weep for it. Lord, forgive me, for Jesus' 
 sake. Oh, for a sanctified heart ! Lord, undertake for thy 
 unworthy creature, and come not into judgment with me ! 
 Look upon me in the face of thy dear Son, and when thou 
 lookest, forgive." 
 
 "27th. — Found much sweetness in drawing near to God in 
 family worship — a blessed sense of the reahty of eternal things. 
 Oh, that I might be kept through this day with a steady eye 
 upon Christ ! Read for our morning's portion part of the in- 
 teresting life of Gideon. How true it is — Not hy might, nor 
 hy poiuer, hut my Spirit, saith the Lord. There is an inex- 
 pressible sweetness in the thought, that salvation is not of 
 works ; and that our full and complete acceptance is not in our 
 wretched selves. It is all, all of grace." 
 
 "Nov. 7th. — A little more than twelve months ago the 
 Lord led me up into the mount, and showed me in a small 
 measure His glory, aiid caused His goodness to pass before 
 
102 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY ^YIXSLOW. 
 
 me. My soul was happy, oh, how happy. Felt I was with 
 God, and that God was with me. Was permitted to talk with 
 Him — as a friend talketh with his friend. Perceived in Christ 
 a fulness I had no conception of, and it was but — Ask^ and ye 
 shall receive. My dear children were wonderfully brought to 
 the foot of the cross, and one after another translated out of 
 Satan's dark kingdom into the kingdom of God's dear Son. 
 Shall I ever forget that most precious season of Divine love ? 
 Oh, never, 7iever may it be blotted out of my mind for one 
 moment. But how is it now with thee, oh, my soul ? What 
 has thy God been showing to thee of laie ? He has been 
 showing me more of the hidden evil of my heart, and calling 
 me to sore conflicts with the world, the flesh, and the devil. 
 With this threefold troop I have had much to do lately. But, 
 thanks be to God, my Saviour is not ovit of sight, and he has 
 engaged to bring me ofi" more than conqueror." 
 
 " 20th. — I think it wrong to be always living in anticipation 
 of affliction, just because it is written. Through much tribulation 
 ye must enter the kingdom. Sufficient to the day is the evil thereof. 
 It is very discouraging to hear ministers sa}^, especially to 
 young Christians, ' Pray for faith, but remember, in so doing, 
 you pray for afflictions.' Christ says, Ask anything in my 
 name ; ask, that your joy might he full. I know that the apos- 
 tle speaks of rejoicing in tribulation. Howbeit, I do tliink by 
 constantly poring over anticipated troubles, we lose the sweet 
 enjoyment of present mercies in the expectation of future evil. 
 I pray to be enabled to praise Him for the present, and trust 
 His love for all that is to come. Lord, increase my faith, and 
 let my joy be full." 
 
 "Dec. 10th. — This day is set apart by the churches of the 
 Baptist denomination for prayer and fasting, for the outpouring 
 of the Holy Spirit. May God give His especial blessing, and 
 hear their prayers ! The gracious Revivals in New York have 
 stirred up the Lord's people on this side of the Atlantic. May 
 it be for the glory of His own name." 
 
 " This evenmg attended a prayer-meeting in John-street, for 
 the outpouring of the Holy Spirit. It was full. The fault I 
 generally perceive with most prayer-meetings occurred again 
 to-night. The prayers were too long, and not to the point. 
 Evervthing was touched upon but the one thing we had 
 agreed to meet and pray for, except by one dear brother, and 
 that but slightly. I do wish there were less ^jreaching in 
 
DIARY. 103 
 
 prayer, and more beseeching^ as poor needy sinners, for what 
 we want. On my return home I assembled the domestics, v/ho 
 all profess to know the Lord, and suggested that we should join 
 our supplications as a household, for the great blessing that 
 thousands to-night were looking up for. I read the second of 
 the Acts. We then sang an appropriate hymn, when each — 
 all except the housemaid — prayed, following each other with- 
 out rising from our knees. We had four short, sweet, and 
 simple prayers, and it was a time of refreshing, for which God 
 be praised. Oh, that the Holy Spirit may be poured out from 
 on high upon all our souls, and upon the churches." 
 
 "20th. — Still travelling on, I humbly trust, through this 
 w^aste howling wilderness, to my heavenly home. Want to 
 look more to Jesus, that I may be strengthened for this con- 
 tinual warfare, for so it is with me. But am too often looking 
 to some broken cistern still ; but afterwards can say, when en- 
 abled to turn and take a fresh view of Christ, I do prefer Him, 
 with all my trials and cares, to all that the world calls good." 
 
 "Jan. 21st, 1829. — What a mercy, of more value than a 
 thousand worlds, to walk in the fear of the Lord all the day 
 long ; to be enabled to live above the smiles or frowns of this 
 world, and to find the love of Christ all-satisfying to our souls ; 
 to feel all creature-love swallowed up in Christ, and to know 
 that he loves us better than we love ourselves. Have felt 
 these few days very comfortable, stayed upon the Lord : and 
 to-day, sweet peace and joy, arising from a believing view 
 of the ever-blessed gospel of the Son of God. As soon as I 
 take my eye from Jesus, and look for anything like comfort 
 from this world, or look within for something to rest upon, I 
 begin to be in trouble, and have again to run into the name of 
 the Lord, which is a strong tower to my soul at all times." 
 
 " Have been conflicting more or less, for some time, with 
 vain thoughts. But yet I can say, In the multitude of my 
 thoughts laithin me, thy comforts delight my soul. But yet what 
 grief it is that my thoughts are not always on the Saviour, 
 and that there is such proneness to attempt to draw comfort 
 from the creature, and to sorrow when we find it all vanity 
 and vexation of spirit. Oh, why look to creature-love when 
 the love of Christ is always the same ? " 
 
 " March 8th. — How many mercies have I had to recount 
 since I last wrote in this journal ! How much of God's gra- 
 cious dealings with my soul have I omitted to record — and I 
 
104 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 regret it; for it is good to look back and see, from time to 
 time, how wonderfully and mercifully He leads His people 
 forward through a host of enemies to that happy place He has 
 prepared for them. I find Mr. Evans's ministry as rich pas- 
 ture to my soul, and the fellowship of the church very sweet 
 and encouraging. ' How sweet to my soul is communion with 
 saints ! ' I can truly say so." 
 
 "April 13th. — Had, to-day, a most sweet and endearing 
 view of God, as my Father in Christ. Felt as if the Lord 
 were again about to pour out His Spirit, and revive His work 
 in our hearts. Went this morning to see Yf est's picture gal- 
 lery. A view of ' Death on the Pale Horse,' and ' Christ 
 Kejected,' was very interesting. But who can portray, in any 
 painting, the extent of misery and woe sin has brought into 
 our world ; or the sufferings of that holy, spotless soul, that 
 was once on Calvary made an offering for sin? Upon the 
 whole, it is not an outward exhibition of these important 
 truths to the natural eye, but the application of them to the 
 heart by the power of the Holy Ghost, that can alone con- 
 vince, humblCj and lead the soul to Christ. May I be led 
 more and more to cling to Jesus, and feel increasingly the 
 power of His resurrection in my soul : the Spirit bearing testi- 
 mony within that He still lives to do all He has promised for 
 me and mine, and all who come unto Him." 
 
 " Answered Mr. W 's letter of inquiry, respecting the 
 
 revivals in America. In his acknowledgment, he seems de- 
 lighted with having an account from one who had been so 
 blest in such a season of especial love, and who could bear a 
 personal testimony to the truth of them. Received from him 
 
 a kind invitation to visit N ; but cannot go so far from 
 
 home, unless the Lord had something for me to do there. 1 
 am his. Blessed be His name ! if it were His will to send 
 me to the farthest corner of the globe, to bear my evidence to 
 that most blessed truth, I would most willingly go. God does 
 pour out His Spirit in a most especial manner upon His church. 
 At such times of ' refreshing from the presence of the Lord,' 
 sinners are converted to God, and saints are avrakened out of 
 their slumbers, and set out with fresh vigour and zeal to run 
 the heavenly race. Thanks be to God for such seasons ! " 
 
 "When the first Adam fell, God cursed the ground for 
 man's sake, and said, Thorns also and thistles shall it hrinfj 
 forth to thee. When Christ, the Second Adam, came ta by 
 
DIAEY. 105 
 
 made a curse for us, He was crowned with those very thorns 
 with which the earth was cursed, thereby removing the curse 
 far from us. How wretchedly poor are my best conceptions 
 of this most glorious work ! Dear Lord, enlighten my under- 
 standing, that I may more and more see the infinite value of 
 this wondrous work of everlasting love ; and may my base 
 ingratitude and unbelief never be thorns to wound Thee afresh. 
 Give me more of that precious faith that purifies the heart and 
 works by love." 
 
 " I have been ill, and was much reduced in strength, but 
 the Lord has heard prayer. At a time when my disorder was 
 peculiarly distressing, and was pronounced likely to be fatal, a 
 word of rich comfort was brought to my mind, and I was sup- 
 ported. This was the passage of Scripture my mind was 
 stayed upon : With God all things are possible. Then, thought 
 I, it is possible He can reheve me from this sore disease ; and 
 I know something of his tender mercies, and that His ear is 
 ever open to the cry of His people. My pain was removed, 
 and my strength is gradually returning. Oh, how precious is 
 a throne of grace, and a God of grace to go to ! " 
 
 " Last week, dined with the poor of the church, nearly 
 sixty in number. The rich waited upon the poor, and they 
 seemed happy. The dinner was provided by our dear pastor, 
 who also waited upon them. It was a delightful day — not 
 soon to be forgotten. We had much Christian experience and 
 profitable conversation, and did not separate until near nine 
 o'clock. Want more life in my soul — more of the Spirit's 
 influence — a closer walk with God." 
 
 " How often has an unkind look or word proved a blessing 
 to my soul ! It has made me flee to Christ ; and there I have 
 found no unkindness. He has appeared, at such times, more 
 than to make up for the want of all creature-love and created 
 good." 
 
 " The King of England is very ill, and perhaps will shortly 
 be called to lay aside all his earthly honours and royal ap- 
 parel, and feel his crown of nothing worth. What a change ! 
 What are kings better than the poorest beggar, when they 
 are about to die? One drop of the precious blood that cleans- 
 eth from all sin, and applied by the power of the Holy Ghost, 
 is of more worth to a dying sinner than millions of kingdoms. 
 How does our poor King feel at this present moment ? God 
 be merciful to his soul I " 
 5* 
 
106 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 " The Lord has housed my dear H 's eldest girl before 
 
 she had tasted much of the bitter weeds growing in this waste, 
 howling wilderness. He took her to Himself; and she is safe 
 from the windy storm and tempest. Oh, for grace to improve 
 all His dispensations, and to remember, that all things luork to- 
 gether for good to them that love God, to them who are called 
 according to His purpose. I desire to keep a steadfast eye 
 upon Christ, come what may — desiring no will but His!" 
 
 " Tlie King of England now lies in his splendid palace, 
 closed in his leaden coffin from the sight of every one. Nearly 
 his last words were, ' God, I am dying ! ' And a few mo- 
 ments before he expired, looking wistfully around upon his 
 attendants, he exclaimed, 'This is death!' But oh, what is 
 the death of the body in comparison of the death of the soul 1 
 Mrs. P is also taken away in a moment. She was pre- 
 paring mourning for the king ; but they have met in eternity. 
 The curtain has fallen, and we cannot tell what is passing 
 there. Oh, how needful to be ready ! Precious Jesus ! bind 
 the gospel to my heart, and let it be dearer to me than ever." 
 
 " Dec. 26. — Was ill yesterday, and was obliged to keep my 
 bed. The family had a happy day together. It was pleasant 
 to them to meet so many, and I am sure my kind-hearted 
 
 T was as happy as a prince. After all I could not but 
 
 reflect on the way in which Christmas-day is generally kept. 
 It is the birth-day of our blessed Lord. In general, when the 
 world celebrates the birth-day of a highly distinguished indi- 
 vidual, they speak much of his character, ways, and exploits. 
 But on this day of carnal delight, Christ's name [in the social 
 circle] is seldom mentioned. He is kept out of sight, or if any 
 allusion should be made to him, it would be received with 
 grave looks and sullen indifference. Oh, w^hat a God of long- 
 suffering is ours ! How He bears with, and how much He has 
 to bear with, even in his children. May He keep us from the 
 evil of the world ! * I pray not that thou shouldest take them 
 out of the luorld, but that thou shouldest keep them from the evilT" 
 
 From her diary we turn again to her correspondence, which 
 affords a further insight into the activities of her Christianity. 
 Truly, like her Lord and Master, she "went about doing good." 
 And here it may be appropriate to advert to a feature in Mrs. 
 Winslow's Christianity, thus far almost entirely veiled from 
 sight. The simple design with which we set out was to ex- 
 hibit more her inner and hidden, than her outward and visible 
 
DIARY. 107 
 
 life. The careful reader will not fail to infer from the preced- 
 ing pages, and will still more so from those which follow, that 
 her Christianity w^as eminently irractical. Her whole religious 
 life was an embodiment of the great principle — " No man 
 liveth to himself" From the moment that she felt the power 
 of vital godliness in her own soul, the grand, all-absorbing aim 
 of her hfe was the bringing of souls to Christ. She sought to 
 accomplisli this in that way for which God had peculiarly fitted 
 her. Other Christians, equally devoted and zealous, may have 
 possessed more taste and aptitude for Committee work ; and 
 others might be more frequently seen moving amidst the whirl 
 and din of the great machinery of Christian benevolence. But 
 while in the earlier stages of her religious course, when health 
 and time were more at her command, she took a prominent 
 and active part in the various religious societies of the day, 
 yet as years grew on, and life became more mellowed and con- 
 templative, she sought to promote the same object from more 
 concealed and sequestered points of observation. It would 
 therefore be unjust to the subject of our Memoir to infer, that 
 because we especially restrict ourselves to the more important 
 feature of her Christian character — her walk with God — 
 that therefore it was deficient in that outward and correspond- 
 ing life of Christian activity — that ' looking not upon our own 
 things, but also upon the things of others' — which, more or less, 
 is essential to the harmony and symmetry of Christian charac- 
 ter. If ever an individual laboured for the conversion of sin- 
 ners, it was she. But she laboured, as we have remarked, in 
 that way for which God had peculiarly and eminently qualified 
 her. He had given her the " pen of a ready writer." This 
 gift — a rare and a powerful one — she wholly and constantly 
 consecrated to God. It is believed she seldom wrote a note, 
 however brief, in w^hich there was not something to lead the 
 thoughts to eternity. But not to this instrumentality of doing 
 good was she wholly restricted. For several years she had her 
 district, which she faithfully and systematically visited. And 
 when too advanced in life for so active an employment, she 
 would often steal away to some scene of sickness and sorrow 
 amongst the abodes of the poor, especially to those who were 
 of the 'household of faith,' to administer spiritual instruction 
 and comfort, and on her way home she w^ould frequently make 
 purchases for their temporal necessities. Truly, like her Lord 
 and Master she " w^ent about doing good." 
 
108 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 TO HER MOTHER. 
 
 " I have just returned from visiting the poor and wretched 
 in the lanes and alleys of this great town. I have but little 
 time to write as I formerly did. I often have thought that the 
 Lord had nothing more for me to do ; but He seems to have 
 called me to my old work again, and it is one I always had, 
 and still have, great delight in. IMay He bless it to me and 
 
 to the poor to whom I am sent. Mr. and I go arm and 
 
 arm with our Bibles from house to house, arid from attic to 
 attic. He always gets a little behind when I am leaving and 
 tells them to be sure and ' say their prayers.' He is a high 
 churchman, but I believe he is laying it aside every day. 
 There is no doubt in my own mind of his conversion. He is 
 the Lord's, and He is teaching him." 
 
 " If dear is, through God's blessing, with you, my 
 
 dearest mamma, you will find enough in the journal addressed 
 to him to interest you as far as details go. I do feel very 
 anxious about you all at this unhealthy season of the year. 
 May God preserve you all ! How very necessary to have our 
 witness within quite clear, that when he says, ' Come up 
 hither,' we might be able to reply, ' Lo, Lord, with joy I 
 come !' Oh, to look upon this world continually as one we 
 have nothing to do with but to pass through it to the glory of 
 Him who has prepared a better for us ! The road through it 
 was designed to be a thorny one, that we should not set our 
 affections here ; and as it is our dear Lord's will that we should 
 have tribulation, what a mercy for us that He chooses all our 
 trials, and arranges them in proper order in His infinite love 
 and wisdom to suit our soul's best interests. Let us look 
 oftener to our mercies, and less to our trials, and then see what 
 cause — oh, what cause — we have for thankfulness. I feel at 
 present very low, but am trying to look to Jesus. The cares 
 of my children, though not beneath my roof, and under my 
 eye, are ever mine in a measure. Who can tell what a 
 mother's heart feels, but a mother ? You and I know ; but 
 what is best of all, our God knows. Let us think a little of 
 our home — our pleasant home. A precious Jesus waiting to 
 welcome his weary pilgrims there. A sweet home indeed — a 
 Father's home- — and a happy meeting with all who are dear to 
 us and to Christ, No more sea to separate us — no more sick- 
 ness^ no more sin, nor more labour — but one endless scene ol 
 love and happiness.'- 
 
LETTERS TO HER CHILDREN. 109 
 
 TO HER SON R . 
 
 "My dearest R , 
 
 " How is it that you do not write more often ? It 
 grieves me much when I do not hear. I have heard that 
 your httle R. was ill ; and as no letters have come to hand, I 
 begin to fear some evil, and my spirit seems to rest upon you, 
 my precious child. Oh, that God might keep you from all 
 evil ; above all, keep you from ever sinning against Him, or 
 grieving His Holy Spirit, by whom you are sealed unto the 
 day of redemption. I do pray that the glory of God might 
 be dearer to you than your own life. Oh, be very jealous of 
 it, and watchful over yourself. Think what a God, God has 
 been to me. How He has led me continually to look to Him 
 in all my diflBculties, and dehvered me out of all my troubles. 
 Oh, it is sweet to live a life ol holy dependence upon the 
 Saviour ! I find it more and more so every day. May he 
 save you from trusting your own heart, or leaning to your own 
 understanding in anything. I feel I as much need His faith- 
 ful hand at every step now as when I first started in the divine 
 life, and so will you. Oh, try Him. The more you try Him, 
 the more you will find Him a Brother horn for adversity. 
 Make use of His precious promises. He will accept them, 
 and make full payment, and you shall have to praise and bless 
 His holy name. Oh, that God might be pleased in mercy to 
 keep us all from ever bringing a disrepute upon His holy 
 
 cause. It were better to die. I think is still seeking, 
 
 but he certainly has not found Him yet, whom we love and 
 desire to love more and more. Oh, how precious is Jesus to a 
 poor seeking sinner ! His name is as ointment poured forth. 
 What a mercy that when we sin we have in Him an Advo- 
 cate, and a fountain still open to wash away our sin, and al- 
 ways welcome to come ; never so welcome to Christ as when 
 we feel our misery and poverty, our nothingness and unwor- 
 thiness. He it is who gives the broken and contrite heart that 
 He delights to look upon. The enemy would fain keep us 
 from Christ when we feel our vileness ; but it was for sinners 
 Jesus died. May the Lord bless you, and keep you moment 
 by moment, is the daily prayer of your affectionate mother." 
 
 to her son h . 
 
 " My dearest H , 
 
 " . . , . AYhat should we do were it not for a throne 
 of grace to go to ? In all my troubles and difiiculties I floe to 
 
110 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 Christ, for none can help me but Him. Do you the same. 
 You need not carry your own burdens, when Christ has com- 
 manded you to cast them on Him. Learn, in the earher 
 stages of your Christian pilgrimage, to go constantly to Jesus. 
 Live upon Him for all you need for both soul and body, for 
 He has redeemed and will take care of both. In doing 
 this you honour Christ, and glorify your Father who is in 
 heaven. Another thing I would wish to impress upon yon 
 is, never to keep guilt upon your conscience. As soon as 
 you are sensible of having sinned, go that moment to Jesus, 
 confess it, and ask His cleansing blood to be applied, and the 
 guilt removed. Do not be tempted to put it off to a more 
 convenient hour. Here Satan will endeavour to foil you by 
 persuading you that it is time enough to confess that sin at 
 night, when you retire for prayer ; but go at that moment to 
 Christ, and this will eimble you always to rejoice in Him, and 
 enable you to retain a tender conscience, which is a great 
 blessing. . . . We have no revivals here, but still there is a 
 great deal of sterling Christianity found." 
 
 TO HER SON O . 
 
 " . . . . Oh, what a God do you serve ? How infinitely 
 condescending in all His steps towards you, and how deeply 
 indebted are you to give yourself entirely to Him ! Dear 
 Mr. Evans was showing on Tuesday evening the various 
 w^ays in which a believer first declined from God. One was 
 in making light of little sins. He remarked the Holy Spirit 
 might be grieved even by a look — a lie in the heart which 
 did not escape the lips — a w^ord — a thing which might be 
 liwfnl in itself, but might wound the tender conscience. The 
 Spirit consequently withdraws His heavenly influence, and the 
 soul is left barren and cold : and this state grows more and 
 more, until the Lord again appears, restores the soul, and 
 heals the poor backslider. There is a backsliding in heart 
 which only God can discern. Oh, let us beware of that. 
 Beware of trifling conversation ; it grieves the Spirit. One 
 way to be assured that we are not going hack in the divine 
 life is to go forioard. This is an observation of Mr. Evans 
 yesterday, and which he says he got from good Mr. Adams, 
 of whom he speaks in the highest terms as a minister and a 
 Christian. He preaches at Cowes." 
 
LETTERS TO HER SON. Ill 
 
 TO HER MOTHER. 
 
 " . . . . To-morrow we shall have our dear pastor again. 
 Oh, what a precious gospel we hear ; doctrinal, practical, and 
 experimental religion, beautifully blended. He preaches the 
 gospel, lives and walks in it. We all love him. He is truly 
 a man of God, liighly gifted, yet humble as a little child. I 
 never knew a man who seemed to find his way to one's affec- 
 tions as Mr Evans does in his preaching. He arrests your 
 attention, instructs 3'our mind, and captivates your heart. 
 While he is preaching, you never see a wandering eye. Oh, 
 for many more such labourers !....! have had a minister 
 from on a visit ; but his conversation has been unprofit- 
 able. He is too light and trifling. My soul was grieved ; 
 but remembering that a sparrow falls not to the ground with- 
 out my Lord, I thought he was sent here by Him. I asked 
 the Lord if He had not sent him, to remove him ; or that, if 
 He had, to change his spirit and sanctify his sojourn under my 
 roof. The Lord heard me. This man is changed for the 
 better, and confesses he feels as different as a man could feel 
 from what he did before he came. He attended Mr. Evans's 
 ministry, which was greatly blest to him ; and he is now 
 humble as a little child, and his conversation serious and 
 proper. He remarked to me, ' I believe in Revivals now, for 
 I can truly say I feel a revival in my own soul since I came 
 to town.' So you see how good is God to all who trust in 
 Him. 
 
 TO HER SON 0- 
 
 " Sabbath. — Heard Mr. Evans from the words. Bear ye one 
 another's burdens, and so fulfil the laiu of Christ. How deep 
 are the riches of the love of Christ. The Lord does wonder- 
 fully open His heart to this His beloved servant. In the 
 afternoon the newly-appointed deacons were set apart. It 
 was a most dehghtful season. Mr. Evans so humble and 
 excellent in his address to them, particularly in his allusion to 
 their care for, and their kindness and tenderness towards the 
 poor — their poor brethren. Saw beloved Mr. Whitmore ; he 
 gave me a loving look for you, I know. It was just such a 
 look as he used to give you, so you can fancy it. 
 
 " Well, I have been to prayer for you. What a comfort 
 we can meet at a throne of grace, although so far apart : and 
 
112 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 that Jesus can answer our petitions for eacli other at the very 
 moment they are presented ! God be praised for this glori- 
 ous plan of salvation, and this method of access to Him, so 
 suited to our condition. No other way would have done. I 
 see, dear child, by the papers, you are delivering a course of 
 sermons on the Second Advent of Christ. I pray you may 
 be kept within the strictest bounds of Scripture, for it is 
 critical ground upon which you are treading, and the imagina- 
 tion may be made a handle of by the enemy of souls to lead 
 you into vain speculations, as it has done many others. Keep 
 close to the word of God. Do not wear yourself out. 
 
 " I miss your arm when I go to the house of God, and the 
 little chat when we return. But I think of you as I go, and 
 remember Jesus has said, I will never leave thee nor forsake thee. 
 Heaven would be no heaven to me if I did not find my Sa- 
 viour there — He who loved me in prosperity, loved me in ad- 
 versity, and will love me even unto death. This evening I 
 received your interesting letter. It did me good, but I was 
 grieved to hear your spirits were depressed. My precious 
 child, when you accepted the pastoral office, you commenced a 
 life of trial both from saint and from sinner. Oh, do not be 
 surprised at all you meet with. Look to Jesus. Do not let 
 difficulties dirtress you. The cause is Christ's, and all you 
 have to do is to take them to Him." 
 
 " 16th. — Since I last wrote, the Lord has turned my heart 
 to praise, and has most blessedly drawn my soul nearer to 
 Himself, and blessed me with a clearer view of Jesus seated 
 at His right hand — risen indeed ; risen for me, and risen for 
 you. These words have been a sweet portion to my soul : — 
 This Jesus has God raised up, of ivhom toe all are witnesses. 
 And you all are witnesses too, my dear children; for surely 
 God did bow the heavens, and pour out His Holy Spirit upon 
 you as a witness that He that was dead w^as alive, and liveth 
 for evermore. Oh, witness for Him ! let your preaching wit- 
 ness for Him, let your lives witness for Him, let your hearts 
 witness for Him, abounding in love towards Him, and towards 
 all who bear His image." 
 
 TO HER SON H . 
 
 " .... I have just heard of the loss of your dear little 
 M. E. — I feel more for you than for the dear child ; for she, I 
 know, is happy beyond description ; but you, the dear par- 
 
INTERESTING DISCOVERY. 113 
 
 ients, will feel it keenly. I trust the Lord who has wounded 
 will heal and sanctify. We ought to hold our comforts with a 
 loose hand. This is a little scion severed from the parent stem, 
 and transplanted to the garden of glory above. We ought to 
 rejoice while we mourn, that she is taken from the evil to come, 
 and so soon made happy. Keep your eye upon Christ. He 
 loves you as you loved your little one, but He loved her far 
 more, and so took her to the enjoyment of Himself May He 
 preserve you both, and keep you near Himself" .... 
 
 TO HER MOTHER. 
 
 " .... I am as sure as I have got this pen in my hand 
 that a life of constant employment is the best for the Chris- 
 tian ; and, on the contrary, a life of worldly ease and prosperi- 
 ty is a time of temptation to the soul, and great grace is 
 needed to keep us from falling into it. Trials and difficulties 
 lead to God, and the soul is kept lively and active. When 
 external things flourish, inward things droop. When the 
 world frowns, Christ is welcome, and we flee to Him ; and 
 this is one of the reasons that our Heavenly Father so often 
 appears to chide, for His love is always the same, even when 
 Providence frowns. I do not know whether I told you of a 
 little circumstance that took place a few days ago. I was 
 called to visit the case of a poor widow with seven children, 
 living in a miserable alley, and in great distress and want. 
 After some conversation with her, which did not entirely sat- 
 isfy me that she was altogether a Christian, I left her some as- 
 sistance, pointing her, at the same time, to the widow's best 
 Friend. On visiting her again, after some conversation not at 
 all satisfactory, I went to prayer, bringing her and myself to 
 God, not as saints, but as two poor sinners. My heart was 
 much drawn out to plead for her ,• so much so, that I wept as 
 I prayed. On resuming my seat, the poor woman made some 
 allusion to her husband's ordination. ' Was your husband a 
 minister?' I asked. 'Yes, ma'am, he was • and he preached 
 
 the truth, for which he was persecuted. His name was .' 
 
 'Was he ever in America?' 'Yes, in New York.' Did he 
 ever preach in London ?' ' Yes, and came to this house to 
 die.' I was deeply affected to find I was in the lowly cottage 
 where the Rev, Mr. , whom I had often heard with inter- 
 est, breathed his last. I said, ' I knew your husband in New 
 York.' She eagerly fixed her eyes, swimming in tears, on my 
 
il4 MEMOIR OP MRS. MARY AVIXSLOW. 
 
 face, and said, ' Oh, ma'am, tell me your name.' On being in- 
 formed, she said, ' Ah ! I have heard my poor husband men- 
 lion that name ; and only think that you should be brouglit 
 here, in such a place, to visit me !' I felt very much affected ; 
 and, as you may suppose, more interested in her case than 
 ever. Good-night. The watchman is crying the hour of nine 
 o'clock." 
 
 TO HER SOX . 
 
 "October 9th. — On Sunday evening I worshipped in Pen 
 tonville Chapel, and heard Mr. Sheppard. As soon as I was 
 seated, I felt such an inexpressible love to God for His great 
 and wonderful goodness to me in all my weary pilgrimage, 
 from the time I used to worship there with your dear father 
 and all you little ones, that I wept. I took a review of all 
 the way He had led me, the troubles and difficulties through 
 which He had brought me, His long-suffering patience and 
 unmerited goodness and love in following, upholding, and com- 
 forting me, and at last bringing me back where my eyes again 
 saw my teacher in the sanctuary where I first heard of a 
 precious salvation and a crucified Saviour. He caused all His 
 goodness to pass before me, and my heart overflowed with 
 penitence and love, I felt, too, near the body of my dear 
 husband, whose spirit, I trust, is rejoicing in glory with Christ. 
 Dear Mr, Sheppard preached an interesting sermon on prayer, 
 illustrated by Samson, when he pulled down the pillars, and 
 destroyed both himself and the Philistines. But there wa8 
 too much of Samson, and too little of Christ," 
 
 "IStli, — Heard Mr. Evans from Hebrews iv. 14; Seeing 
 then that we have a great High Priest^ that is i:)assed into the 
 heavens^ Jesus the Son of God^ let us hold fast our iwofession. 
 He dwelt a great deal upon the real professor holding fast his 
 profession, in which he advanced much to encourage ; while 
 he addressed nominal professors very awfully, and half-hearted 
 professors very closely. While the Doxology was being sung, 
 I thought I would raise my voice in praise, which, as soon as 
 I did, the Lord broke sweetly into my soul, and filled my 
 heart with joy and peace, — the peace which the world knows 
 nothino; of." 
 
 Oh for this love let rocks and hills 
 Their lasting silence break." 
 
LETTER TO HER SON'. 115 
 
 " Monday. — I was yesterday enabled to attend the prayer- 
 meeting in John-street liefore the service, which is always 
 very sweet to my soul. Afterwards, Mr. Evans preached from 
 the words, Thy gentleness hath made me great. In the evening 
 we sat round the table of our dying Lord. I had not tliat 
 clear view of my Beloved I am sometimes favoured with. 
 The subject of tlie discourse was the command of Joshua to 
 the IsraeHtes to go in and possess the land. Mr. E. dwelt 
 miich on the freshness of the gift, and the fulness of the good 
 land ; and showed how many stood but on its borders, and did 
 not enter in. He spoke of Canaan being a type of the king- 
 dom of God in this world ; that there were not two kingdoms, 
 but one, part on earth and part in heaven, as Christ says, The 
 kingdom of God is ivithin you. At the new birth the believer 
 enters into this kingdom, and becomes a subject. He was 
 very full and sweet in encouraging the timid Christian to go 
 fully into this good land, and enjoy the rich blessings that are 
 for him." 
 
 " Another sabbath is passed. I could only attend one 
 service. The text was from Genesis xxiv. 53 : Wilt thou go 
 with this man f And she said, I will go. He was very ex- 
 cellent ; but as Mr. Whitmore said, he did not open the casket 
 enough, and speak quite so much of Christ as he might have 
 done. On Tuesday morning I heard Mr. Wilkinson at the 
 Bank. Genesis xxi. 3. It was full of Christ, and so refresh- 
 ing and encouraging. Remember, my dear O , the more 
 
 your sermons are filled with Christ, from first to last, the more 
 will Christ honour your ministry. There is no preaching hke 
 it. Never be afraid of not finding something new to say of 
 Him. The Holy Ghost wiU supply you with matter as you 
 go on. Never doubt it, never fear. The whole Bible points 
 to Christ, and you must make it all bear upon the same sub- 
 ject — Christ the sum and substance of the whole. In Him, 
 God and the sinner meet, and they can meet nowhere else. 
 All the promises are in Christ Jesus, and we must get into 
 Christ before we can get at the promises ; and then they are 
 all yea and amen to us." 
 
 TO HER MOTHER. 
 
 ". . . . I often think how mysterious are the ways of God. 
 It is our mercy, however, to know at all times that He is di- 
 recting our steps, and that not a circumstance in our lives but 
 
116 MEMOIR OF MRS. M4RY WINSLOW. 
 
 is included in the ererlasting covenant that is ordered in all 
 things and sure. I feel your society would add much to my 
 happiness, I often have so much to say to you. But oh, what 
 a mercy that we both have Jesus to open our hearts to ! It 
 is a great thing to be helped to be satisfied with God's deal- 
 ings and ways, and not to dictate to Him, even in our minds, 
 what we conceive would be better for us. It is not change of 
 place or circumstances, but Christ alone that can make us truly 
 happy here and hereafter, God would have us cease from 
 these things, and live upon Him alone for our enjoyments. 
 
 Mr. is fast declining, and seems to have to make a fresh 
 
 acquaintance with Jesus. A cold, intellectual faith, a mere 
 assent to the gospel, will not stand in a dying hour. We want 
 something more." 
 
 "Yesterday I heard a precious sermon from Mr. Evans, 
 from Rev. i. 8, showing, throughout the whole, that Jesus 
 Christ is the omnipotent God, ' the Almighty.' It was grand, 
 it was sublime. I trust I felt something of the convincing 
 power of the truth, that this omnipotent Being was my precious 
 Jesus, in whom I trust, and on whom I daily depend for all I 
 need for time and for eternity." 
 
 TO HER CHILDREN. 
 
 " .... I look upon more in the light of a backshder, 
 
 and have a more favourable opinion of him than his family 
 have, although he is in a most miserable state for a Christian 
 to be in. But let him that thinketh he standeth^ take heed lest he 
 fall^ is an admonition that should cause us to look narrowly to 
 our own way, and not cast the first stone at a fallen brother, 
 but rather pray for such a one. Beware, my dear, dear chil- 
 dren, of the first declension from Christ. Examine your hearts, 
 and bring them daily, yea hourly, to Jesus, with all that you 
 find evil there ; and He will subdue it, and give you the vic- 
 tory. Never sit down to reason with your own heart, for it is 
 deceitful ; but fly to your true, your tried Friend, and He will 
 never disappoint nor deceive you. Never neglect private 
 prayer ; and plead hard with Jesus for a constant and abiding 
 spirit of prayer, so that you can lift up your heart to Him 
 wherever you are, or in whatever you may be engaged. Plead 
 much for the promised indwelling of the Holy Ghost. Be 
 cautious of grieving this most blessed Guest of your souls ; and 
 when you do, go immediately to Christ, and He will wash it 
 
LETTERS TO HER CHILDREN. llT 
 
 all away. Avoid light, trifling professors of religion ; their 
 influence will be as poison to your souls. Be very cautious 
 to whom you open your heart. Make no one your confidant 
 but Jesus. Oh, commune with Him of all that is in your 
 heart. If you are wounded, go and tell Christ. If you are in 
 need, go and tell Christ, — the silver and the gold are His. If 
 you are in trouble, go and tell Christ, and He will deliver you 
 out of it, and you shall glorify Him. Live upon Hira as little 
 children would live upon a dear, kind, and tender father. Oh, 
 how happily will you then pass on your way ! If at any time 
 you are in perplexity or difficulty, through your own impru- 
 dence or otherwise, go not to an arm of flesh, nor sit down to 
 consider how you are to obtain deliverance ; but go directly to 
 Jesus, and tell Him all, all ; and He will appear for you, and 
 bring you out of all, by suggesting to your minds the right 
 means to be used, and following them with His blessing. Oh, 
 I beseech you to do this, and may the Lord incline you to do 
 so for His name's sake ! Amen and amen." 
 
 TO ONE OF HER SONS. 
 
 "How is it with your soul and body to-day, my dear child? 
 I trust you feel Christ very near and increasingly precious. I 
 felt much comfort to-day while pleading with many tears for 
 }ou. I believe the Lord heard, and will graciously answer. I 
 seldom lift up my heart to God, but you are present to my 
 mind, morning, noon, and night. May He hold you continu- 
 ally in the hollow of His hand, and make you a rich blessing 
 whenever He calls you to stand up in His name." 
 
 Elevated as were at times her spiritual feelings, it will ap- 
 pear from the following that she was subject to those changes 
 and depressions which more or less mark the experience of all 
 the Lord's people. And yet it was a characteristic of her 
 faith, that in her gloomiest depressions, and in her deepest 
 trials, she never lost sight of her interest in the unchangeable 
 covenant. That covenant was her sheet-anchor in every storm. 
 She knew that God might vary His dispensations, but could 
 not change in His love. She learned to judge of Him, not by 
 His providence, but by His word ; by what He said rather 
 than by what Ho did ; and tliis kept her soul confiding and 
 serene amidst the fluctuations of hope and the waves of sorrow. 
 One trait, however, of her Christianity we must not overlook. 
 She was never satisfied to remain in a sluggish state of soul, 
 
118 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 or to walk beneath the veiHngs of the divine presence. She 
 arose and "went about the city, in the streets and in the 
 broadways, seeking Him whom her soul loved," nor rested 
 until she found Him. The following extracts, illustrating this, 
 are from letters addressed to one of her sons : — 
 
 "29th. — I feel very low in my soul, and need a plunge in 
 the divine life. I have not, since that precious revival, felt so 
 barren and so listless as of late. But God knows my heart, 
 how I long after Him, and how far I am from being happy or 
 satisfied in such a frame. How miserable it is to walk with- 
 out the sun ! But in the darkest hour the Christian has, he 
 may safely rely on the faithfulness of Him with whom is no 
 shadow of turning. This is my comfort — Jesus is still the 
 same. But I want to walk closer to Him, and to enjoy the 
 smiles of His blessed face. "What is the world, or ten thousand 
 worlds, to me, if He withdraw His heavenly countenance ? 
 Nothing under heaven can compensate for the loss of this. 
 True, we are to walk by faith ; but I always fear something is 
 wrong in us when Christ retires, even for a day or an hour. I 
 have been trying to examine myself, and can see nothing but 
 evil ; therefore I must turn afresh to Christ, and one believing 
 glance of that all-sufficient Atonement will dispel every cloud, 
 and fill my soul with joy and comfort. How I covet the 
 broken heart and the contrite spirit ! I would rather seek my 
 Saviour, sorrowing every step I take, than feel a dull, hard, 
 insensible heart. Jesus has died — Jesus is risen — and Jesus 
 is in very deed at the right hand of God exalted, and there 
 ever lives to plead the cause of His poor, tried, tempted fol- 
 lowers. I have been thinking of the worldling's happiness. 
 It never satisfies — affords no real enjoyment — ^it does not reach 
 the soul. Ten thousand worlds could not satisfy me, now that 
 I have tasted the unspeakably precious love of Christ. Well, 
 then, let us hold fast our confidence, and still look upward ; 
 and when we cannot run, let us walk ; and when we cannot 
 walk, let us creep after him — but still, go forward. Better to 
 follow Him as a Mary did, weeping, than be satisfied without 
 Him. Oh, that we may press on, remembering Jesus' eye is 
 ever upon us, although we may not always be able to discern 
 Him." 
 
 " I am convinced that much intercourse with lukewarm pro- 
 fessors does great injury to the believer, for which reason I 
 longed to return home once more. Oh, avoid such ! Light 
 
LETTERS TO HER SON. 119 
 
 and trifling conversation acts as a poison to the life of God in 
 the soul. It grieves the Spirit, and He withdraws His sen- 
 sible influence. May the Lord keep us from evil, that it 
 grieve us not, and restore constantly to us the joys of His sal- 
 vation." 
 
 " I felt refreshed on Tuesday evening at the lecture. How 
 needful are the means of grace, if we wish to thrive. I hope 
 you will encourage meetings for praj'er, my beloved child. 
 May God give you wisdom in all things, and grace to do His 
 most holy will ! Let me entreat you to look to him con- 
 tinually, for counsel to direct in little as well as in great mat- 
 ters. Great things often spring out of little things. I perceive 
 you have forgotten ' Rutherford's Letters.' I wish you had 
 taken them. Keep to the old divines. Modern divinity is 
 very shallow — has very little of Christ and experience. May 
 God give you a spiritual appetite and deep experience in the 
 things pertaining to His kingdom ! Oh, that we might both 
 be led to sit more constantly at the feet of Jesus, looking up, 
 like little children, into His face to catch His smile and watch 
 His eye — to see what He would have us to do, seeking no- 
 where else for comfort and guidance but in Him. In a short 
 period, and we shall have done with everything but God ; and 
 oh, that we may have chiefly to do with Him now." 
 
 " How sweet to feel that all the kindness and tenderness of 
 the creature flow first from Christ. If this be so, the creature 
 may change, but Jesus never. In all your perplexities, rest in 
 the Loirl, and ivait jMtiently for him. It is in a patient wait- 
 ing for Him and not in an impatient dictating to Him, that He 
 blesses. Does the burthen of your work press heavily upon 
 you ? Try and think it not a burthen — Christ has borne a 
 heavier one for you. Count it an honour ; and be assured 
 that this is a trial of your faith, and to lead you to know more 
 of your own heart and more of the heart of Jesus. The re- 
 ligion of Christ I more and more see to be a divine, a glorious 
 reality. It is no cunningly-devised fable ; it is truth — con- 
 firmed, settled, grounded in the heart and soul by the power 
 of the Holy Ghost. Let us not, then, be faint and weary 
 because of the way. It is the Lord's way. Thorny and 
 steep though may be the ascent, when we reach the summit 
 we shall be well repaid for all our labour." 
 
 " Your dear letter has been a source of much comfort to 
 me, and this morning particularly was much blessed to my 
 
120 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 soul. As you say, ' What a blessing it is to realize the Being 
 of God.'' I feel that He is, and that He is all around us — 
 closer to us than we are to ourselves ; for in Him we live, and 
 move, and have our heing. I often awake in the morning with 
 strong unbelief, attended with such a feehug of despondency 
 as throws a gloominess over all my prospects. How dig- 
 honouring is this to God ! I fall upon my knees, and in a mo- 
 ment it is gone. I see the face of Christ, and his loving, 
 compassionate look disperses the cloud, and all is peace. This? 
 morning, your sweet view^ of God refreshed me while in 
 prayer, and drew forth my soul towards Him in adoring grat- 
 itude." 
 
 "Last evening, at the church-meeting, in relating the ex- 
 perience of a child of God, Mr. Evans spoke of the individ- 
 ual's earnest wish to be honest ivith God. Oh, I thought, 
 that God would make me honest with Him ; that He would 
 give me a holy, upright, honest dealing — having no conceal- 
 ments, no reservations ! A thorough cleansing from all hypoc- 
 risy, vain-glory, and hated emulation — a wanting to be thought 
 something, when we are less than nothing ! What a chamber 
 of iniquity is the heart, all hidden and unknown, until God in 
 mercy shows it to us, as we are able to bear the disclosure ! 
 This is ploughing up the fallow ground afresh." 
 
 " I have never felt God the Father so dear and endearing 
 as of late. To say, 'My father,' — to come to Him as to a 
 father who loves and pities you, and can and will do all need- 
 ful good, — how sweet ! But while He sends the trial until it 
 accomplishes the end for which it was designed, yet he wall 
 give all-sufficient grace while it lasts. I would gladly have 
 you with me, if it were the Lord's will ; but our happiness 
 depends not upon change of circumstances or of place, but 
 upon a submission of our wills to the will of God — a complete 
 surrender of every desire and wish to Him who is acquainted 
 with what is best for us." 
 
 "Feb. 27th. — This is my birthday. This morning, before 
 rising, I had such a precious manifestation of love poured into 
 my soul by the God of love, that my heart was broken with 
 deep contrition and repentance, accompanied with a holy long- 
 ing to be more swallowed up in God — to be more like Him — 
 more wholly and devotedly His, than I have ever been. My 
 heart seemed opened to God, and His heart opened to me. I 
 felt such a spirit of praise as I could scarcely contain. What 
 
LETTERS TO HER SON. 121 
 
 shall I say to these things ? I am Christ's and Christ is mine. 
 He causes me to know it ; I feel it to be so without a doubt, 
 or even the shadow of a doubt. And yet this very thing it 
 is that humbles me in the dust before Him. I weep that I 
 am such a sinner, while I stand in wonder and astonishment 
 that God can love, and does love, such a one as I ; and having 
 loved me in time, will love me through eternity. Oh, help 
 me to praise Him ! Jesus is mine — Jesus is yours ; and we 
 shall live together to praise Him and cast our crowns at His 
 feet." 
 
 "I opened my Bible this morning, and my eye rested upon 
 Nehemiah, i. 11 : O Lord, I beseech thee, let noio thine ear he 
 attentive to the prayer of thy servant, and to the prayer of thy 
 servants, who desire to fear thy name ; and prosper, I pray thee, 
 thy servant this day, and grant him mercy in the sight of this 
 man. It was quite a season of reviving to my soul, and my 
 heart was made glad, for Nehemiah's God is my God, and 
 your God, too, beloved ; and His ear is ever open to our cry. 
 And yet, when the Lord was about to answer Nehemiah's 
 prayer, he was afraid through unbelief What a good and 
 gracious God He is, to bear with us as He does ! Our wicked, 
 soul-destroying, God-dishonouring unbelief, keeps us grovelling 
 in the dust, when we ought to be soaring on the eagle-wing of 
 gratitude and love." 
 
 " How needful it is to have a Guide who knows the end 
 from the beginning, and if we ask counsel from Him, He will 
 give it, only watching our deceitful hearts, that we do not 
 make up our minds, and then go to God for counsel. I be- 
 lieve there are many Christians w^ho are walking in a smooth 
 path, and have nothing outwardly to contend with, who would 
 be thankful to be tried ; for they feel that if they have faith 
 it has never been tested, and are sometimes doubting, because 
 they have never been afflicted as God's people usually are. 
 They have never been led to feel deeply the abounding iniquity 
 of their own hearts ; and while they read. If ye he without 
 chastisement, whereof all are j^drtakei's, then are ye hastards and 
 not so)is, they tremble lest they should only have a name to 
 live, while they will be found wanting in the last day. Oh, 
 that God would make us grateful that it is as well with us as 
 it is ; and that the little trials we have may be so sanctified 
 as to draw us near to Christ, and make Him more precious 
 than ever I " 
 6 
 
122 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WTNSLOW. 
 
 "The difficulties aud trials connected with your holy office 
 as a minister of the everlasting gospel, give me many errands 
 to the throne of grace, where 1 lay your case l:>efore the Lord, 
 and plead with many tears on your behalf. But I pray to be 
 kept, at the same time, from a spirit of dictation. Our heav- 
 enly Father knows better how to control and direct our con- 
 cerns than v,'e know ourselves. Oh, to be among the number 
 who wholly trust in the Lord! What a perpetiial warfare is 
 the Christian's course ! Many of God's saints talk to me as if 
 I had got above these things; but oh, they little know that I 
 am as poor as poverty itself, and am obliged to draw all my 
 supplies from the same source with themselves, and that with- 
 out Christ I can do nothing. Indwelling sin is my daily cross, 
 compared with which every other appears liglit." 
 
 "Nothing but the power of the Holy Ghost can convert 
 the soul. The word, and the preaching of the word, pass for 
 nothing, unless accompanied by the Holy Spirit. It is like 
 attempting to shoot a bird from a gun charged only with 
 powder. This should give the trembling, doubting believer 
 much comfort, and also the more assured one ; for if God has 
 begun His work in the soul, God will complete it, and all sin 
 cannot destroy it. A sinner converted by the Holy Ghost 
 cannot destroy himself He may destroy his comfort and 
 peace, and impair his spirituality, but his soul he cannot de- 
 stroy, for Christ has redeemed and sanctified it by His blood. 
 How poor and contemptible is all the wisdom and talent of 
 man when left to itself! Salvation, from first to last, is of 
 God. God begins it, God carries it on, and God will finish it 
 for ever. Blessed be His holy name ! " 
 
 " January 28th. — I perceive by your letters that you are often 
 depressed. This is natural, from the many trials and difficulties 
 connected with your office. But you must remember that you 
 are called to endure hardship as a good soldier of Jesus Christ ; 
 and must expect to be tried and buffeted if you would be an 
 experimental minister of the cross. And do not forget He is 
 infinite in wisdom, who selects and orders all your trials as 
 those best suited to your case, and most qualified to prepare 
 you for your work. Be assured no other would have done. 
 May we be more sanctified by what we suffer ! I am yet a 
 learner, and seem as if I always required my Father's disci- 
 pline. Oh, for a more subdued and weaned heart from all but 
 God!" . . 
 
123 
 
 " The more T know of the utter impossibihty of the Chris- 
 tian, after he is a Christian, to keep himself for one hour, yea, 
 for one moment, the more deeply anxious I feel for myself, and 
 for all who profess the name of Christ. Those may be ready 
 to say, who are but little acquainted with the deceitfulness of 
 their own hearts, Is thy servant a dog that he should do this f 
 but the longer we are in this warfare the more jealous we 
 should be of ourselves. It was the prayer of David, Hold 
 
 thou me up and I shall be safe. Tender love to dear . 
 
 Tell her I have never been so firmly convinced as of late of 
 the absolute necessity of the holy, wise walk of a minister's 
 wife. It is my constant prayer that God will fully qualify 
 her for her high and solemn position. One consideration is of 
 importance. A minister's wife should never allow her hus- 
 band's mind to be harassed with the anxieties and perplexities 
 of domestic concerns. Every little difficulty and annoyance 
 of that kind should be kept quite from his knowledge. Not 
 long since, I was much pained, when on a visit to a dear man 
 of God, while listening to his many conflicts, his wife, a Chris- 
 tian woman, too, entered, and commenced a tedious detail of 
 a difficulty she had had with one of the domestics. Poor man ! 
 he sighed, and that sigh conveyed a volume of meaning to my 
 mind." 
 
 " Unbelief is the strongest enemy we have to contend with. 
 How it tries and harasses the believer every step of his event- 
 ful journey ! It engenders in him often the basest ingratitude, 
 and causes him to mourn when it is his duty and privilege to 
 rejoice. How much too it curtails all his mercies ; for it is 
 now, as in the days of Christ, Be it unto you according to your 
 faith — so that little faith secures but little comfort, and less 
 enjoyment. Oh, for a stronger confidence in God !" 
 
 As a means of embodying and giving practical effect to the 
 holy sympathy of Christian mothers, perhaps no institution has 
 been found more suitable, or has been more honoured with the 
 Divine blessing, than the " Maternal Association." The influ- 
 ence of pious mothers, silent, yet mighty, has become almost 
 proverbial. How few training for the Christian ministry in 
 the schools of the prophets, or as settled pastors are cultivating 
 successfully the vineyards at home, or on heathen shores are 
 honoured missionaries of the cross, would be found, on inquiry, 
 who had not been blest with godly mothers ! And of these 
 how fewer still the number who would not testify that it was 
 
124 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 that mother's hand that first guided their infant footsteps to 
 the Saviour! It was here, in the bosom of the Christian 
 family, the tiny seed was sown which, in long after years, and 
 when, perhaps, the hand that dropped it was mouldering in the 
 grave, struck deep its roots, and extended wide its branches, 
 blessing the world with its fruit, and beautifying the church 
 witli its comeliness. It was here, in the pious home, the 
 latent desire to be a Christian was inspired, the first thought 
 of being a minister was conceived, and the purpose of a life for 
 Grod was formed. Oh, let Christian parents awake to a con- 
 viction of their mighty, almost creative power ! Few were 
 more sensible of this than Mrs. Winslow, and few more hon- 
 oured than she in the right direction of her influence. Com- 
 pelled by her removal from town, to withdraw from attendance 
 at the meetings of the John-street Chapel Maternal Associa- 
 tion, yet cherishing for its object an undiminished and prayer- 
 ful interest, she addressed the following letter, designed to 
 encourage her in this good work, to the former wife of her 
 pastor : — 
 
 "... And so you are discouraged. Trials and difficulties 
 many, faith tried, and only three met ! Did you expect to 
 undertake a work for Christ and get on smoothly, while there 
 is everything within and without to oppose it ? Did you ex- 
 pect faith would not be tried in this matter ? Faith takes 
 hold of the strength and power of God, and looks alone to 
 Him. You were looking to your little feeble band of three, 
 although you were within the number Christ has promised to 
 bless. In a country place in America, a few Christian females 
 engaged to meet to pray for a blessing on their families ; but 
 after a while it declined, and continued to do so until only two 
 came. " Shall Ave give up ?' was the question. They thought 
 of God's faithfulness to His promise, of His power and good- 
 ness, and resolved to go on. They met. these two only, again 
 and again. They pleaded the promise, and encouraged each 
 other by their prayers. At last the aiisioer came. God tried 
 their faith, Jesus interceded, and it had not failed. Some who 
 had left them returned, others followed ; the place of prayer 
 was soon filled. The Lord poured out His Spirit on them, and 
 they prayed in earnest until the blessing was given. The 
 church felt the holy influence ; their children at home began 
 to inquire what they must do to be saved ; the mothers direct- 
 ed them to Jesus, and prayed on. God in very deed bowed 
 
LETTER TO THE MATERNAL ASSOCIATION". 125 
 
 the heavens, and came down in their midst to bless them. 
 Many of their unconverted children and husbands were led to 
 submit to Christ, and the whole church shared in this remark- 
 able revival. Dear sister, take courage and look up. God 
 loves to hear your prayers. Did the mothers in John-street 
 Chapel but see their children standing on the edge of an awful 
 precipice, and know that none but God could prevent their 
 destruction, would they not cry day and night to Him ? But 
 what can be compared to the eternal death that awaits them, 
 if they die unconverted ? And will they not meet together 
 for united prayer, that their dear children may escape from the 
 wrath to come? Again I say unto you, if two of you shall 
 agree on earth as touching anything that they shall ask, it shall 
 he done for them of my Father luhich is in heaven. Matt, xviii. 
 19. Thi^ is a promise worth millions of gold and silver, and 
 this promise you have to plead. May God help us to give 
 full credence to His word, and deal with Him as one who 
 cannot but do all He has promised, because He is God! In 
 proportion as we feel the infinite value of the immortal soul, 
 we shall feel anxious for its salvation. Now, beloved, expect 
 difficulties, expect opposition, even from your own heart; but 
 you have the Lord on your side. Jesus is waiting to be gra- 
 cious. The Holy Spirit is waiting to do all that He has en- 
 gaged to do ; and angels are w^aiting to rejoice over uncon- 
 verted sinners, in answer to your prayers. We shall never 
 fully know, until we get to heaven, the mighty power of im- 
 portunate prayer with God. If I knew your time of conven- 
 ing, I would unite my poor prayers with yours. I am earnest 
 on this subject, knowing the great blessings that have attended 
 such efforts. Go forward in the strength and power of Jeho- 
 vah-Jesus, and God must and will bless you." 
 
CHAPTER VII. 
 
 Mrs. Winslow was never more at home, and, we might 
 add, never happier — for her happiness and her Lord's glory 
 were one and inseparable — than when administering counsel 
 to the perplexed, or comfort to the afflicted. Her own natu- 
 rally strong judgment early brought into exercise, and schooled 
 for the greater part of her life in adversity, she was thus emi- 
 nently fitted, from the rich stores of her own experience, to 
 administer to the exigencies of others — advising those whose 
 path was intricate, and comforting those who were in any sor- 
 row, by the comforts with which she herself had been comforted 
 of God. Hence so many of the letters which appear in this 
 volume are addressed to persons in circumstances of trial and 
 affliction. 
 
 The bereavement of her pastor, by the removal of his wife, 
 under circumstances of such painful interest, would naturally 
 call forth the expression of her deepest and most tender sym- 
 pathy. During the week which intervened between the sud- 
 den attack and its fatal termination she was scarcely absent 
 from the scene of anxiety ; and one whole night was spent in 
 prayer with Mr. Evans, in the vestry, over which lay the suf- 
 fering object of their long midnight wrestlings. We find in 
 her journal the following references to this mournful event. 
 
 "May 5th, 1831. — Since I last wrote, the Lord has taken 
 my dear friend, Mrs. Evans, after little more than a week's 
 illness. His presence was with her, and He most graciously 
 manifested His love towards her in carrying her through the 
 dark valley. She died in the triumph of faith. Her dear 
 husband was almost overwhelmed by the suddenness of the 
 stroke, and staggered under his irreparable loss. But the 
 Lord who spake such sweet peace to his wife, supported the 
 bereaved husband, and enabled him to say, Thy luill he done ! 
 It was a shock almost sufficient to overcome nature; but God 
 is all-sufficient at all times for His saints." 
 (126) 
 
DEATH OF MRS. EVANS. 127 
 
 "The last time I saw our dear departed sister, Mrs. Evans, 
 was on the day she died. When I entered the room, she held 
 out her hand, and, taking mine, said some most affectionate 
 things ; for her whole heart seemed dissolved into love. I 
 never saw such a death. Her countenance was full of holy, 
 joyful anticipation. Her soul seemed filled with Christ. She 
 said, with uncommon energy of manner, ' See, dear sister, how 
 good is the Lord ! Jesus is most precious. Christ has so 
 blessedly manifested Himself to me. He has been with me 
 through all the operations ; ' and then looking earnestly into 
 mv face, said : ' I have known more of Christ in this week than 
 I have known in all my whole life put together. And now,' 
 she continued, with such a sweet smile, ' I am going to Him, 
 He has prepared a place for me,' 'Yes,' I rephed, 'and He 
 will come and receive you to himself, according to His own 
 word.' After a few words of prayer, I left her, with a sweet 
 hope of meeting her at the right hand of God. Death, in her 
 case, was divested of its sting and the grave of its victory, and 
 Jesus enabled her most blessedly to triumph over both." 
 
 In one of her letters to her family, she refers to the grace 
 which sustained her afflicted pastor : — 
 
 " Dear W\\ Evans will be again in his pulpit on Tuesday 
 evening. He is now in the country. I dined at Hampstead 
 the Friday before we went ; he was very much supported, but 
 still greatly afflicted. He came to me on the Sunday night 
 before the funeral, I heard his voice below, and ran down to 
 meet him. Finding I was alone, he dismissed the carriage 
 and came up. He sat down, and gave vent to his feelings. 
 We had much conversation, and God did bless it to the com- 
 fort of his dear servant. I said, ' God will restore peace to 
 your soul.' He replied, ' He has done it, and within this house.' 
 He left me, composed and comfortable. He told me since, that 
 he shall never forget that spot, to the day of his death." 
 
 Soon after this event, she visited her eldest son, who was 
 then resident at Cambridge. From thence she writes : — 
 
 " I had a pleasant journey to this place, with only two 
 ladies inside. We had some agreeable and, I hope, profitable 
 conversation, althougli they were both, I could see, bnt moral- 
 ists, depending upon their doing and their not doing. Yet 
 they listened very attentively while I endeavoured to show 
 them the cobweb garment of such a profession. They gave 
 me their respectful attention, but I could clearly perceive they 
 
128 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW 
 
 did not at all understand me ; so I left them as I found them. 
 Perhaps they may think more about it some time hence. On 
 
 arriving at the house, dear E met me in the parlour, and 
 
 instantly after Mrs. C , with her good husband, in his gig, 
 
 at a little distance. And now I am seated in the sweet little 
 drawing-room, surrounded with shrubbery, and everything 
 looking delightfully refreshing to the eye. You might fancy 
 yourself twenty miles in the country, it is so encircled with 
 
 trees. In a short time T made his appearance, in cap and 
 
 gown, looking very well. We all went, in the evening, to 
 hear good Mr. Simeon, and my soul was sweetly refreshed 
 
 with the simple, but precious truths of the gospel. G 
 
 took me to some of the colleges ; but although they are very 
 
 fine, I have but little taste for these things. Miss M and 
 
 Mrs. F called yesterday. To-morrow I go to Haslingfield. 
 
 Dear Mrs. C insists that my visit to Cambridge is to her." 
 
 Of the letters Avritten during her visit to Haslingfield, where 
 she met much that was congenial with her taste — a picturesque 
 village, and spiritual and affectionate intercourse — only one can 
 be found. It is addressed to her bereaved pastor ; — 
 
 "Haslingfield Vicarage, Cambridge, May 24tli, 1831. 
 " . . . . I long to know how your mind is, and if the 
 Lord is keeping you resting in the bosom of His love, comfort- 
 ing and refreshing your soul by continual draughts from the 
 overflowing fountain of living waters. Oh, how sweet it is to 
 be kept in such a position ! Pray that I may be kept in it. I 
 have had some taste, and that makes me long for more. I am 
 staying a little while with those who truly love the Lord, and 
 whose works proclaim their love sincere. I see godliness 
 brought into daily practice, without ostentation. These dear 
 friends do the will of God from the heart, and it is their meat 
 and drink so to do. May God bless them more and more ! 
 
 Mrs. C is a real labourer in the cause of Christ, and Mr. 
 
 C one of the kindest-hearted and most benevolent beings 
 
 I ever met with. . . . Oh, what a mercy to have a throne 
 of grace, and a tender, compassionate, loving Christ to go to 
 at all times, and under all circumstances ! A large welcome ; 
 no frown to fear ; no distant look. Oh, that we all might live 
 upon Him, moment by moment ! For this reason, He takes 
 away our props, that w^e might lean altogether upon Himself; 
 and that is why He has dealt with you, my dear brother in 
 
A TOUCHING INCIDENT. 129 
 
 affliction. God knows, I have loved you better since the 
 Lord placed you in the same furnace with myself. My heart 
 can feel all you felt. You will at some time or other see, as 
 I have seen, that that w^as the very thing you needed, and 
 wonder at the Lord's goodness in delaying it so long. Blessed 
 be His name, that He has in a measure comforted you ! and 
 be assured He will fill the void He has made, with Himself. 
 He took your dear wife away to make room for Himself; and 
 the place that w^as prepared was quite ready for her, and she 
 was quite ready for it ; so that all we have to do is to bow to 
 His most blessed will, and fill up the little span that now re- 
 mains for us here, in doing the work He has assigned us, and 
 be ready to go home at a moment's warning. . . . You 
 have a double claim upon Him now ; make good use of it, for 
 He loves to have us argue the point with Him. We need not 
 fear being too familiar or too troublesome. The oftener we 
 come, the more welcome. Now I do thank God, who has 
 blessed you with His own Spirit, or you could not permit such 
 a poor one as I am, who have need to be taught of you, to talk 
 to you in this way. I am persuaded you know all this, and 
 oh, how much more ! But God does often speak a word of 
 comfort through his poor and despised ones, and sends a mes- 
 sage of love by the mouth of a young child to an elder one ; 
 and the elder will be glad to receive it, too. ]\Iay Jesus com- 
 fort your heart, and give you much of His sensible presence. 
 Love to dear C ." 
 
 It was during her visit to Cambridge that the touching inci- 
 dent in her Christian feelings, mentioned in the following ex- 
 tract, took place: — 
 
 "I wrote to you yesterday ; but as I was just now reading 
 dear Mr. Simeon's Memoir, I felt such a gush of holy love, 
 even the love of Christ, filling my heart, that it brought afresh 
 to my mind a circumstance, which, if you see Mr. Cams, I 
 wish him to know. I went to hear Mr. Carus one evening 
 when at Cambridge. My heart during the day had been cold 
 and barren. I took my seat in the pew, in this wretched 
 state of soul. Dear Mr. C. announced his text : / sat down 
 under His shadow loith great delight, and his fruit luas siueet to 
 my taste. — Song of Solomon ii. 3. His first observation was, 
 'These words refer to Jesus.' In a moment my soul was 
 melted, my heart overflowed w^ith love: I wept. His name 
 was as ointment poured forth. I coiled myself up in one cor- 
 
130 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 ner of the pew, and had the most blessed season of commun- 
 ion through the whole service. What he said of whom my 
 soul loved was sweet and refreshing. From that time I have 
 never seen nor heard Mr. Cams, but the Lord did, through 
 him, send a rich blessing to my soul. Give my love to him. 
 We shall soon meet where we shall be all of one mind, in a 
 brighter, happier world, surrounding the throne of Him we 
 love. Blessed be God for this prospect ! It often causes the 
 dark cloud to withdraw, and the weary soul to take fresh cour- 
 age, and press onward, and look upward. Blessed is the hope 
 of the Christian ! Many may be the trials of his faith ; but I 
 believe the most tried Christian knows the most lo\nng heart 
 of the Saviour. He is a tried stone. Tried by the hand of His 
 Father ; tried by the hand of justice ; tried by the wicked, and 
 tried by His saints. He tries the faith He gives. Had He 
 not tried me in the furnace of affliction, my loss would have 
 been immense. I thank Him for my deep, deep cup of sorrow. 
 Whatever draws or drives us to Christ is a blessing. We then 
 breathe a holy, heavenly atmosphere, and see the poverty of 
 all other things to make us happy here or hereafter." 
 
 From her Diary. — " Returned from Cambridge. The Lord 
 carried me out, and brought be home in safety. I have had 
 many things to exercise my mind, and some very important 
 ones to decide upon. May God add His blessing, and merci- 
 fully forgive my manifold infirmities and shortcomings. I 
 have to praise His holy name for a comfortable assurance of 
 my adoption in His family. I can come to Him as my Fa- 
 ther, and find it good to draw near to Him at all times. His 
 loving-kindness He does not take from me, nor suffer His 
 faithfulness to fail. Blessed be God for His goodness to dear 
 
 G ! From a letter received from him, it appears Christ 
 
 has mercifully at last shone in upon his soul. I rejoice over 
 him, and pray he may be kept still going forward, until he ob- 
 tains a clearer view of the loveliness of his dear Redeemer." 
 
 "April 17th. — I have just returned from Islington church, 
 where I heard Mr. Melville. I wished much to hear him 
 preach on the second advent of Christ, but was disappointed, 
 as he did not touch upon the subject ; but he was very great and 
 powerful. The text was, / am the Lord. I change not ; there- 
 fore ye sons ofJacoh are not consumed. He was very excellent 
 upon the immutability of God. I never heard a more power- 
 ful preacher, and one so completely full on every point be 
 
LETTER TO HER SOX, REV. I. D. W. 131 
 
 touched. I thought, however, there was not enough of Christ; 
 but he was more on the attributes of God, particularly on His 
 unchangeable nature, and the impossibility of being otherwise 
 than what he had declared Himself to be — an unchanging 
 God." 
 
 TO HER SON, REV. I. D. W- 
 
 " June 15th. — . . Tiie Lord has wonderfully upheld me 
 
 in 's illness, and under great fatigue and anxiety. As thy 
 
 day Z5, so shall thy strength be, is a promise fulfilled afresh, as it 
 has been a thousand times over in my experience. I have 
 
 been thinking of entering upon his new sphere of labour, 
 
 and it recalled to my recollection, as illustrating the uncer- 
 tainty of life's brightest prospects, the Lord's mysterious deal- 
 ings with two ministers, with whose cases I became acquainted 
 in New York. The one was that of the Rev. George Duffie, 
 minister of St. Thomas's Episcopal church; and the other, 
 that of the Rev. M. Bruen, minister of the Bleeker-street 
 Presbyterian church. Their attached congregations erected 
 for them new and beautiful sanctuaries, with handsome dwell- 
 ings adjacent. Their prospects for the future were bright and 
 promising, but soon after these edifices were completed, and 
 they had taken possession of them, both, after a few days' ill- 
 ness, were brought to the grave. The circumstances made a 
 deep impression on my mind at the time, and which I have 
 
 not yet lost. I have written to to remind him of this, 
 
 and to implore him to turn in upon his own heart, and see how 
 matters stand between his soul and God. It is an easy thing 
 to preach to others, and to do many things : but it is quite 
 another matter to appear naked before a holy God, and to 
 render an account of every idle word. True, His children are 
 already justified, and stand complete in Christ ; but even here 
 we may be taken by surprise, and what is yet more awful, 
 may make a fatal mistake. Therefore it is that the Lord 
 warns us to watch for His coming. Oh, that we may go to 
 Jesus for a fresh anointing of His Spirit ! The Lord has, I 
 hear, suddenly removed one that was committed to your 
 charge. Did you ever examine her as to the state of her 
 soul ? Did you personally warn her of her woful condition as 
 a sinner ? It is easy for you to warn sinners from the pulpit ; 
 but to go to them, examine their hope, and to deal faithfully, 
 honestly, yet affectionately with them as in the sight of God, 
 
132 MEMOIR OF xMRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 is the solemn duty of every one who stands up professedly in 
 the name of Christ. Whatever God has given you to do, do 
 it faithfully as in His sight, whose eye is watching all you do 
 and all you do not. Oh, that you might feel the infinite value 
 of one lost soul, and the responsibility that rests upon you as 
 a professing minister of Christ ! You may reply, that people 
 will resist this personal examination. They may say so at 
 first, and yet they may have to thank you for it to all eternity. 
 It is not talking about religion, or assenting to all you say, that 
 accomplishes the great object ; it is a close personal investiga- 
 tion of the real condition of their never-dying soul. It is not 
 their constant attendance at church, and taking the sacrament, 
 and saying prayers, that will save them ; you have been 
 taught difierently from this, and therefore more will be required 
 at your hands." 
 
 " I was glad to hear from you, and trust you are in your 
 new habitation by this time. Be thankful for it, and look fully 
 to the Lord, and He will supply all your need^ according to His 
 riches in glory hy Jesus Christ. Only think of such an encour- 
 aging promise made to us ! Why need we want any good, 
 when the Lord has said. No good thing loill He loithhold from 
 them that lualk uprightly ? And again, /, the Lord, search the 
 heart, to give to every man according as his ivork shall he. Thus 
 the Lord deals with us according to the working of the heart. 
 How jealous, then, ought we to be over our hearts ; and when 
 we find a traitor there, how earnest should we be to bring him 
 directly to the Saviour, that He might enable us to place our 
 foot upon its neck, while He himself subdues the evil that He 
 hates. How many, alas ! there are, who deem a life of exter- 
 nal decency and order alone sufficient ; who think, if they scru- 
 pulously attend religious duties, visit the poor, &c., God is 
 well pleased, and all is well. But God has to do with the 
 heart, and all these external things might be done, and yet 
 everything be wrong there. He looks at the spring of all we 
 do, not at the action only, but at the motive from whence it 
 springs. The apostle speaks of the constraining love of Christ. 
 Love to God, and love to His people because they are Plis, 
 should be the ruling principle urging on to every good word 
 and work. The Lord is blessing 's ministry. Leaming- 
 ton is highly blest with the Gospel. Mr. Craig is faithful to 
 
 sinners, and so is dear Dr. Marsh. Lord has got the 
 
 honour he sought, but oh, what a bubble ! Oh, that we might 
 
LETTER TO HER SON, REV. I. D. W. 133 
 
 always endeavour in all things, in thought, word, and deed, to 
 please God ; setting aside everything which is not connected 
 with His glory, and contemplate all things and all events more 
 in the light of eternity ! My dear children, I see myself more 
 and more, every hour, a poor sinner, unworthy of the least 
 crumb that falleth from the Master's table. But I see, at the 
 same time, Jesus a great Saviour, divinely able, and most lov- 
 ingly willing, to save the chief of sinners, even me ; and no 
 one can tell how this thought fills my heart with contrition, 
 and my eyes with tears. I have never wept so much for sin 
 as I have done lately. Often have I put up the prayer, Search 
 me, God. The Lord has heard and answered it ; and oh, if 
 it had not been that the fountain was still open, I should have 
 sunk into unutterable despair. He has ploughed up the fallow 
 ground afresh of my poor heart, and the view presented has 
 prostrated me in the dust ; and if ever I felt what a broken 
 heart and contrite spirit was, I have of late. Oh, the evil 
 that is there covered over by the rank weeds of self-love, self- 
 complacency, or self in some hideous form or other, that it is not 
 discernible until the Holy Spirit makes it known. And yet 
 how little do we know of it even by this divine teaching ! 
 But if God is pleased to show us enough to make us cling 
 closer to the cross, to make Jesus more precious, sin more hate- 
 ful, and our prayers more of a wrestling character for the 
 special, sanctifying, life-giving power of the Holy Ghost, shall 
 we not have cause to praise and bless His holy name for ever 
 and ever ? But while I have thus been led of late to mourn 
 so much for sin, I have never felt pardon so abundantly mani- 
 fested. God be praised for a free-grace gospel! Oh, keep 
 close to the cross ! Look well to your own vineyard, and 
 then will you be able to take care of the vineyards of others. 
 Know nothing among men save Christ Jesus crucified. Take 
 Him for an example in all things ; aim to have a single eye to 
 His glory ; and that God may bless you and give you abund- 
 ance of grace here, and a plenitude of glory hereafter, are the 
 prayers of yours, &c." 
 
 It was in 1833 that Mrs. Winslow paid a final visit to the 
 United States. It was at a somewhat advanced period of life 
 tliat she took this step ; but she was constrained to do so with 
 the view of meeting, for the last time on earth, her aged 
 parent, and her children who were residing there. Accom- 
 panied by her daughter slie again embarked upon the ocean. 
 
134 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 Her outward passage was attended with much personal suf- 
 fering and relative anxiety. But God sustained and bore her 
 through it all, and granted her a happy re-union with those 
 she lov^ed. After twelve months of sacred enjoyment, she 
 parted from them, to meet no more until they assembled again 
 " without fault before the throne of God and the Lamb." The 
 following interesting letter to her pastor, Rev. J. H. Evans, 
 and extracts from her private journal, touchingly describe her 
 exercises during this visit ; while they present her as still 
 maintaining the same elevated tone of spirituality, child-like 
 trust in God, and singleness of heart in His service, which 
 characterized her in all places and under ail circumstances : — 
 
 " Beloved Brother, — New York, June 22d, 1833. 
 
 " How I have wished to write to you since my arrival, 
 but hitherto I have not been permitted. The Lord has carried 
 me through many trials and sorrows since I saw you, and He 
 has also given me to see much of His goodness, faithfulness, 
 and unchano:inor love, towards the unworthiest of all His saints 
 — the weakest of the w^eak and the vilest of the vile ; but so it 
 is, and on such he loves to bestow His choicest mercies. For 
 ever blessed be His name, my soul can adore Him ; and it is 
 my heart's desire to trust him to the end. I left England with 
 a heavy heart. The parting w^th my dear children on the 
 deck of the vessel, on a wet, dark, and dreary night, was dis- 
 mal. When they left me, I retired to my cabin, to commit 
 them and myself to God. [Here follow details of the severe 
 illness of her daughter and herself] But God was with me ; 
 and, as soon as I was recovered, I lifted up my heart to Him 
 who alone could help me in this my great time of need. I felt 
 persuaded my dear child might in a moment be in eternity. 
 Oh, it was a trying season. I clung to Christ — pleaded the 
 promise that He once had made over to me, that He would be 
 a Father to my fatherless children, and implored Him, in the 
 dear name of Jesus, to spare her until she knew him as her 
 reconciled Father in Christ Jesus. It was a trial of faith — 
 naked faith, resting entirely on the faithfulness of God. The 
 Lord lieard my petition ; and, although she continued more or 
 less ill, she gradually recovered. The weather was stormy 
 and most unpleasant during the greater part of the passage — 
 but He brought us through all; and on the 7th of May I had 
 the comfort, nay the joy, of seeing my three sons shedding 
 
FINAL VISIT TO AMERICA. 135 
 
 many tears of gratitude over me, on that very spot upon the 
 deck where my heart had been agonized with sorrow, and 
 
 from whence I had sent up so many fervent petitions. E 
 
 was aUve and better ; R , H , and were clus- 
 tering around me, in joyful gratitude to God for bringing me 
 once more to them. I felt happy; but oh, my dear brother, 
 none but God himself could bear wnth such as we are. Did 
 my thank-offerings go up with as much fervour as my earnest 
 wrestlings for help ? Ah me ! This has been my grief, and 
 has often laid me low before God. I abhor myself in dust and 
 ashes on this very account. It is my greatest comfort that 
 Jesus lives, and is at the right hand of God, and His precious 
 blood cleanseth from all sin." 
 
 " Last evening dear was ordained. It was a most 
 
 interesting service. You may suppose what I felt when I 
 saw my son kneeling, while the hands of the Presbytery were 
 laid upon his head, and prayer was offered that God would fit 
 him for tlie great work to which he was solemnly being set 
 apart. TVhen I saw the hands of the ministers resting upon 
 him, my prayer was, ' Now, Lord, lay Thy hand. Thy blessed 
 hand upon him, and fill him with the Holy Ghost, that he may 
 do Thy work from the heart, and be kept humbly sitting at 
 Thy feet.' My paper is drawing to a close, and I have not 
 said half that is in my heart. We both said, that evening, 
 * Oh, that dear Mr. Evans had been in that pulpit ! We love 
 you ; and never can be sufficiently thankful to God for the rich 
 blessing He has made your ministry to us both. Pray for us. 
 I do value your prayers ; for often have they led me nearer to 
 Christ. Dear friend, farewell." 
 
 From her diary at sea. — " May 1st, 1833. — Left England on 
 the 1st of April, from Portsmouth. We are now nearly four 
 hundred miles from New York, with a light wind. Our pas- 
 sage thus far has been most unpleasant. The first ten days 
 
 E was so ill I thought she would have died. I cried to 
 
 the Lord and He heard me, and has been better to me than 
 my fears on her account. We have had unpleasant passen- 
 gers, which has added much to the discomforts of a sea- voyage. 
 My health has greatly suffered, from fatigue of mind and body. 
 Oh, that the Lord may be gracious to me, and overrule all for 
 our good and His own glory! He has been my Helper hither- 
 to, and will he not be my Helper still ? In Him is all my 
 trust. The weather is now fine, and all on deck are enjoying 
 
136 MEMOIR OP MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 it. May the Lord, who has preserved us through so many 
 storms and dangers, carry us in safety, and give me to see my 
 children's face with joy, and not with grief, and lay His cause 
 upon all our hearts ; so that we may, as with one heart, enter 
 upon the work with a single eye to His glory, and find it our 
 sweetest meat and drink to do His will." 
 
 " Neiv York^ 8th. — The Lord has again brought me to this dis- 
 tant land, after passing through much sickness and anxiety on 
 the passage, and caused me to see the faces of my three children 
 
 with joy ; and has, within a few days, brought dear G 
 
 from Bermuda to join our family circle. For ever blessed be 
 his dear name, for so many instances of His wondrous love to 
 unworthy me." 
 
 " 19th. — I have had the comfort of seeing my three children 
 engaged in the service of Christ, on that very spot where, 
 seven years ago, He translated them out of Satan's kingdom 
 into the kingdom of His dear Son. Precious Jesus ! fit them 
 all for great usefulness, and cherish this infant church in Thy 
 tender bosom. Carry the pastor and the fiock near Thy com- 
 passionate heart, and greatly bless with the gifts and graces of 
 Thy Holy Spirit. My dear mother, too, in her 84th year, has 
 arrived, accompanied by B from Cincinnati. She is con- 
 fined to her room from lameness. Her memory fails her much; 
 but, although the earthly tabernacle seems by little and little 
 to be dissolving, she still retains the same kind and tender feel- 
 ing towards all around her. Her faith seems firm in Christ ; 
 and when she can fix her mind, she appears to rejoice in the 
 hope set before her in the gospel. May her last days be her 
 happiest and brightest !" 
 
 " Have had of late increasing reason to know that God's ear 
 is ever open to the cry of His children, and that He will send 
 down answers of peace. I was ill, — my pain very great for 
 some hours, — nothing appeared to give me relief. At last I 
 fled to my stronghold : I cried unto the Lord, and He heard 
 me. The pain abated, and in about fifteen minutes I fell 
 asleep, and awoke in the morning, feeling only weak, and 
 gradually recovered. Oh, that I did but always at once look 
 up to Christ ! But what a lamentable proneness to go every- 
 where else before we flee into the name of the Lord, which is 
 a strong tower to the righteous. Have been helped to rejoice 
 in His goodness of late, and feel my confidence increase while 
 at a throne of grace. It seems, while there, as if I could not 
 
DIARY. 137 
 
 doubt. I can realize the mighty blessings of the everlasting 
 gospel as mine, and my mind sweetly rests on the Divine 
 faithfulness. I seldom rise from my knees without weeping ; 
 my whole heart melted with contrition in view of the wonder- 
 ful love of God to one so poor and vile as I. Oh, how near 
 does He sometimes draw me to Himself! And when I look 
 around, and see so many mercies, so many blessings, such ten- 
 der care in providing for all my wants, no good things with- 
 held, — although my base heart has distrusted Him in the very 
 midst of countless proofs of His love, — I abhor myself in dust 
 and in ashes. God has forgiven, and does forgive me, but I 
 cannot forgive myself." 
 
 "25th. — How is it w^ith thee, my soul? Hovv^ is it be- 
 tween thee and God ? This is a question I often need put to 
 myself as I journey onward. I require to pause and think 
 what I am, and what I am doing, and whether I really am 
 going forward or not. I have been thinking with what a de- 
 lusion Satan continually aims to blind the minds of men as to 
 the brevity and uncertainty of human life. How often does 
 he prevail, even w^ith the real Christian ! On looking back 
 upon the past sixty years of my life, and forward to the little 
 point that remains, what a dream ! How like a vision does it 
 appear ! Oh, how little of it, if any at all, has been spent to 
 the real glory of Him who gave it. I cannot trace a single 
 thing I ever did in my whole life, that affords me any real 
 pleasure to look back upon. Oh, if I had nothing more to 
 comfort me, I should be a wretched creature indeed ! And 
 now I know and feel at times what a behever in Christ should 
 be who is a candidate for a crown of glory, and a disciple of 
 Him who was not of this Avorld ; but how far short do I 
 come ! Sometimes, when at a throne of grace, I can see and 
 feel forcibly the littleness of everything around me ; and when 
 I have a glimpse of God as He is in Himself, as well as what 
 He is to my soul, I sink in all my nothingness, melted into 
 love at His feet. What should I do but for Jesus ? Precious 
 Jesus ! I do love Thee. Thou art the chief among ten thou- 
 sand. I am wearied with the creature, for disappointment is 
 ■written upon the dearest object here below. But in Thee 
 there is no disappointment, thou blessed, dearest one. Oh, 
 that I could love Thee as I wish to do, and serve Thee with 
 all the powers of my mind and body ! Let not my heart 
 wander from Thee : keep me under the shadow of Thy wing 
 till the storm of life be past." 
 
138 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 "Oct. 15th, 1833. — New York. — My dear mother sailed 
 on this day for Bermuda. I felt I never loved her so well 
 before as 1 have since she left us. When I fancy her, aged, 
 feeble, and, perhaps, ill, on a tempestuous ocean, and exposed 
 to all the discomforts of a voyage, I can but weep and pray. 
 Pray for her I do, and that is my only comfort. I believe the 
 Lord loves her better than I do, and to His care I constantly 
 commit her. She was determined to go, as she said, to lay 
 her bones in her own native place. I urged her to remain 
 with me, but it was her wish and decided determination ; and 
 if the Lord takes her in safety, she will escape the cold win- 
 ter here, and may live a few years longer for it. May God 
 in His mercy carry her in safety !" 
 
 It was again her privilege during this brief and final visit to 
 the United States to participate in one of those showers of 
 spiritual blessing to which reference is made in the earlier part 
 of this volume. The following letter, addressed to her pastor, 
 will convey some idea of the themes and the style of the pul- 
 pit addresses which generally prevail on these interesting oc- 
 casions, and the mode of meeting the numerous cases of awak- 
 ening which occur : — 
 
 "Beloved Bro. in the Lord, — N. Y., Jan. 24tb, 1833. 
 
 " The Lord seems to have awakened his servants 
 here to a sense of their duty, and the vast responsibility at- 
 tached to them as His ministers. ' Protracted meetings ' are 
 now held in almost all the churches, and some of them are of 
 a most interesting character. I have been for some days at- 
 tending one ; it is in a Presbyterian church, and the ministers 
 who conduct it seem men of God, and preach as with the 
 great white throne full in view. The grand aim in their preach- 
 ing and addresses is, to rouse the sinner — to follow him in all 
 his refuges of lies — to knock from beneath him every false 
 prop, and to show him that if he perislies, the fault is not 
 God's, but his own. Next to this, their endeavour is to awaken 
 the church itself to activity and earnestness in the cause of 
 God. The whole day, from six o'clock in the morning until 
 half-past nine o'clock in the evening, with intervals, is devoted 
 to prayer and preaching. After the sermon, all who feel 
 themselves lost and undone sinners are invited to come for- 
 ward and occupy pews in front of the pulpit. The praying 
 part of the assembly then cluster round them, and petitions 
 
REVIVAL IX NEW YORK. 139 
 
 are offered on their behalf. This would be a new and strange 
 thing in England, but God sees fit to own this to the salvation 
 of many souls. Last evening I felt it peculiarly solemn. I 
 felt God was there. Seventeen individuals advanced, many 
 young, some elderly men, deeply concerned. Oh, how my 
 heart was drawn out towards God on their behalf ! There was 
 no excitement — no noise or enthusiasm. The feeling was 
 deep, silent, solemn as eternity. All knelt and followed in 
 prayer, which consisted of eight or nine short, earnest, wresthng 
 petitions to God for their salvation. The church was earnestly 
 exhorted to lay aside their earthly concerns for a season, and 
 give themselves wholly up to the Lord and to His work. 
 While some are engaged in the prayer-meetings, others 
 go out in the lanes and alleys to persuade men and women 
 to come and hear the sound of the gospel. The minister 
 visits, and receives visits at home after the meetings for 
 prayer. I feel my heart a little revived already, and bless 
 
 God for it I should remark, that while the church is 
 
 stirred up to plead earnestly for sinners, the Lord the Spirit 
 causes them to feel their own lack, and brings them to God in 
 humble confession of their coldness and unbelief. Unbelief, 
 unbelief, oh, this is our great crime before God ! We will not 
 take Him at His word, fully believing all that He has prom, 
 ised. Did w^e really believe that sinners will be cast into hell, 
 should we not be more earnest both with them and with God, 
 although we do know that salvation is of God, and that He 
 alone can save a sinner ? Oh yes, we should. But our faith 
 is so small, and what we have we do not exercise sufficiently 
 to obtain more. Is it not often but a mere form of words, 
 when we pray. Lord., increase our faith? It is a cold, formal 
 duty, and we go away, and think no more of it, and so God 
 does n3t grant the boon we so little value. I^Iay the Lord 
 renew His precious work in our souls ! If the religion of 
 Christ is not the business of our whole life, it is nothing, and 
 we are nothing, and shall be found as nothing, or worse than 
 nothing, w^hen He comes to judge the world." 
 
 " 25th. — The Lord is doing a great work here, my dear 
 brother, and my soul rejoices in God and in the prospects of 
 
 His church Whole families have, in the last 
 
 two weeks, been translated out of the kingdom of Satan 
 into the kingdom of God's dear Son. The addresses yester- 
 day were chiefly to urge Christians to increased activity and 
 
140 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 earnestness in prayer, showing their great responsibiUty, espe- 
 cially at such a season. It was solemn, heart-searching truth. 
 Oh, if we did but fully believe that God will condemn the 
 impenitent sinner to eternal perdition, w^e should act very dif- 
 ferently. But we do not believe it, although Jehovah is as 
 much bound to fulfil that promise as any other. How He 
 bears with His redeemed ones ! Why are not our children 
 converted ? Because, humanly speaking, we care so little 
 about it. We pray for them, it is true ; but it is with forma- 
 lity and coldness ; and so we wrap it up, whilt; they are 
 rapidly travelling to the regions of eternal woe. Last eve- 
 ning, the ' anxious seats' were filled with those who earnestly 
 desired the prayers of God's people. Many have been recon- 
 ciled to God through the peace-speaking blood of Christ, and 
 many more are inquiring what they shall do to be saved. I 
 am glad to be where Jesus is passing by. I just get a glimpse 
 of His face now and then, and can plead with Him as a man 
 pleadeth with his friend. Help me to praise Him. When I 
 cannot find words, I sit and weep before Him. His name is 
 Love. That my soul knoweth right well. Oh, that all our 
 children might rise up and call Him blessed ! A young lady 
 in the bloom of youth and beauty, living in all the gaiety of 
 the world, was brought under the appalling conviction of her 
 awful state before a holy God. The world she so much loved 
 was at once dressed in sable to her view. She was miserable, 
 and everything else looked so. For nights she knew not 
 scarcely what it was to sleep. Some time after this she 
 thought she had obtained a hope in Christ, but it was soon 
 gone, and she was left in darkness. But in a few days, while 
 she was in prayer, and while prayer was being made for her 
 by the church, the Lord revealed Himself to her soul, and 
 filled it wnth unspeakable joy. Her eyes were now opened, 
 and everything appeared changed. She w^as happy in the 
 Lord, and her countenance was radiant. When her minister 
 entered the parlour, and extended his hand, he said, ' I need 
 not ask how it is with you ; I see you have been with Jesus.' 
 I must add that this young convert, in all the fervour of her 
 first love, went from house to house, amongst her kinsfolk and 
 friends, imploring them to come and hear the gospel." 
 
 "29th, — Never did I feel my mind more solemn, and my 
 heart more drawn out for the salvation of sinners, than at the 
 present time. As I sat last evening in the sanctuary, and saw 
 
REVIVAL IN NEW YORK. 141 
 
 twenty or thirty, old and young, go forward for the prayers 
 of God's people, thus acknowledging that they felt their need 
 of Christ, I raised my heart to my Father, and prayed Him, 
 for Jesus' sake, to have mercy upon them. Dear brother, the 
 Lord is with us, doing a mighty work. The Baptists are 
 much engaged. A cloud of mercy is hovering over this city, 
 and the prayers of God's people will pierce it, and bring down 
 showers of blessing. My children are earnestly engaged in 
 bringing sinners where the Holy Ghost is displaying His 
 miglity power. They visit from house to house, dealing faith- 
 fully with all they meet who know not God. My own soul 
 is greatly refreshed and drawn near to the Lord. For ever 
 blessed be His name for this renewed token of His kind re- 
 membrance to one so unworthy of the least of His mercies." 
 
 " 30 th. — There is not a country in the world where religion 
 and religious intelligence are so constantly and prominently 
 brought before the attention as in this. In fact, it is, at least 
 at the present time, one continued, interesting topic of conver- 
 sation. Every one is talking about it and engaged in it some 
 way or other. This is a dehghtful state of things. Our own 
 prayer meetings are taking a deeper tone, and the members of 
 the church are engaged each in visiting from house to house, 
 endeavoring to induce some poor sinner to come and hear the 
 gospel. This evening is to be spent chiefly in prayer and ex- 
 hortation. The Lord is indeed doing a great work, and all 
 seem alive to its importance, except a few who are endeavour- 
 ing to justify their coldness and supineness under the plea of 
 God's sovereignty, and so sit still while others are reaping this 
 rich harvest of souls to the glory of God. I think I never 
 heard before such fervent appeals to the consciences of men, so 
 completely divesting them of all their refuges of lies, as I have 
 this last week. How I do love old-fashioned conversions, 
 where sinners are brought to feel they are sinners, crying out 
 under the conviction ' What must I do to be saved?' and are 
 then led by the self-same Spirit to look to Jesus, and are at 
 once enabled to believe and rejoice. I cannot understand this 
 long process of months and years seeking, and seeking, and 
 never finding, until, perhaps, at a dying hour. God is the 
 same now that he was in the New Testament times — Christ is 
 the same — the Spirit is the same — and the sinner is the same. 
 "Well, then, there must be a woful lack of the Spirit's holy in- 
 fluence, owing to our unbelief. I will continue to give you, as 
 
142 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 the Lord will help me, an account of His most gracious deal- 
 ings with His churches on this side of the water. Oh, that the 
 Lord might visit you in your part of the vineyard, and so re- 
 vive His work that sinners may be converted, and the saints 
 sealed and set apart under the fresh anointings of the Holy 
 Ghost. I love poor perishing sinners more than I can express. 
 I have been very narrow-hearted and selfish, and I hate and 
 abhor myself because of it. I have been looking for salvation 
 too exclusively for my own family, and the little circle about 
 me, and have wanted more of that expansive love that brought 
 Christ from heaven to save sinners. Dear brother, endeavour 
 to show them their awful condition ; scatter their vain excuses, 
 and tell them they must repent and believe the gospel, or they 
 are lost for ever. They need not be told that they have no 
 power to repent and beheve. They will soon find they are 
 powerless^ and begin to cry for mercy to Him who will give re- 
 pentance, and power to beheve too. Forgive me for saying 
 so much on this subject to you, who are so much better quali- 
 fied to judge than I ; but I feel more than ever the absolute 
 necessity of awakening the sinner to see his lost condition ; 
 for Satan has ten thousand ways of deluding; and shall we 
 not, under God, do all we can, if by any means we may save 
 some by plucking them out of the fire ? Salvation is of God, 
 but the means are ours, and we cheerfully leave Him to give 
 the blessing. My love to the church in John Street." 
 
 After spending a year in happy and useful intercourse with 
 her children, in reviving the cherished friendships of other 
 days, and in seeing her aged parent once more, and for the 
 last time in the flesh, she re- embarked for England. Her 
 homeward voyage and arrival are thus noted in her journal : 
 
 "May 24th, 1834. — On hoard the 2yO'Cket ship Philadelphia, 
 I am once more upon the mighty ocean, on my return to dear 
 England, with E. and J. R. under my care. The weather is 
 delightful, the wind fair, and everything comfortable as I could 
 possibly expect on board ship. It was a severe trial, parting 
 with my dear children. My mind was greatly exercised, as 
 usual, to know the path of duty. So far the Lord has pros- 
 pered our voyage. I do pray He may be pleased to continue 
 His tender mercies towards us, and grant me to see the face 
 of my dear children, to whom I am going, with comfort, and 
 preserve those I have been obliged to leave behind. The Lord 
 is good, and my soul desires to praise His holy name." 
 
DEATH OF HER MOTHER. 143 
 
 "In sight of the Lizard and of dear old En-rland once more, 
 after a prosperous voyage of eighteen days from New York. 
 The Lord has wonderfully appeared for me, and many have 
 been the prayers offered up on my behalf, and which He has 
 in condescending mercy deigned to answer. A pleasant cap- 
 tain and a fine ship," 
 
 " Landed in Portsmouth in good health, and left the next 
 day for London, where I arrived at nine o'clock in the even- 
 ing, and found all well and happy to see me again. The Lord 
 has been merciful indeed to me. His name is ' Love.' For ever 
 blessed be His holy name, for all His dealings toAvards me. 
 My hope is in Him for all things here and hereafter. God be 
 praised !" 
 
 The mother of Mrs, Winslow has already been introduced 
 to the reader. The time arrived when her long and steady 
 course should be finished, and she should enter into the joy of 
 her Lord. Full of year.^, rich in grace, and ripe for glory, this 
 venerable and beloved lady breathed her last in her own native 
 isle, and was buried in the sepulchre of her fathers. In her 
 diary Mrs. Winslow thus briefly but touchingly records this 
 event : — 
 
 "Heard of the death of my beloved and ever-precious 
 mother, the oldest and dearest friend I had in this world of 
 sorrow. She has gone, I trust, to glory, and is now rejoicing 
 with Christ and the many dear friends who have gone before 
 her. Who can tell the glory that surrounds the saints on their 
 entrance into that abode of bliss? How strange that we do 
 not more long to be there ! Dearest mamma, you are now 
 freed from a body of sin and death, and a life of pain and suf- 
 fering. I sorrow, but not as those who have no hope. I do 
 have a hope of her that gladdens my heart, and I trust to see 
 her again at the right hand of Christ, and to spend a happy 
 eternity with her, and go no more out for ever. Oh, that I 
 may be helped to keep my garments unspotted from the world, 
 and to be ready when the summons comes." 
 
 On the appointment of her son, the Rev. G. E. Winslow, 
 to the vicarage of Tugby, Leicestershire, she spent a few 
 months there, from whence the following extracts are dated. 
 Possessing, as we have already remarked, an exquisite taste 
 for landscape beauty, and charmed with the simplicity of rural 
 life, a picturesque country village — its ivy-mantled church and 
 pretty vicarage, its rude hamlets and honest villagers, its sim- 
 
144 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 plicity and repose would harmonize with her feehn^, and 
 supply her with rich material for reflection of an interesting 
 and varied character. And when to her fondness for the 
 country we add the spiritual eye with which she would con- 
 template the works of God — seeing, enjoying, and glorifying 
 Him in all — we are prepared to find her pouring forth such 
 pious thoughts and poetic feelings, and sketching, with her 
 holy and graphic pen, such interesting village scenes as are 
 contained in the following extract from letters : — 
 
 TO HER SON. 
 
 ^^ Tughy Vicarage^ July^ 1837. — How lovely is all nature. 
 As I sit at my window with the casement open, the beautiful 
 lawn in front, the fine tall trees surrounding it, the hawthorn 
 hedges, the green fields stretching beyond, with the bright sun 
 and refreshing breeze imparting life and healthfulness to the 
 whole, truly do I feel that there is nothing like the works of 
 God, I have just been walking round the lawn, inhaling the 
 fragrance of the sweet roses which hang in rich clusters from 
 the house, thrusting their heads into the parlour window. 
 This is a sweet place. But every place where Jesus is, and 
 which He blesses with His presence, is sweet. He can trans- 
 form a dungeon into a palace, and His presence can turn dark- 
 ness into light. G has just gone to Norton to preach. I 
 
 have been praying for him, that while he is preaching to others 
 God might, tlirough the Eternal Spirit, preach to him. And 
 I have been praying for you too. And oh, that God might 
 make you a real blessing, anoint you afresh for jowr all-impor- 
 tant work, and keep you sitting low in a low place at the feet 
 of Jesus. My heart is often drawn out on your behalf, that 
 you may be more and more deeply taught of the Holy Ghost, 
 may preach and act only to please God, losing sight of self 
 and of everything but Christ, in a full view of the great white 
 throne, and under a deep sense of the vast responsibihty that 
 rests upon you as a minister of Christ. I sometimes think I 
 should have wearied out all the host of heaven with my many 
 thousand prayers and petitions for you all, and for myself; but 
 God is love, and His love is never wearied with hearing." 
 
 " At the entrance of the village is the cottage of a poor aged 
 widow, who can with difficulty move upon her crutches from 
 chair to chair ; but she knows and loves the Lord. Her Bibj<^, 
 * Fox's Book of Martyrs,' a volume of sermons by an old divin*.-. 
 
VISIT TO TUGBY VICARAGE. 145 
 
 and the ' Pilgrim's Progress,' have been her chief means of in- 
 struction, and God has blessed them to her soul. She is greatly 
 afflicted with bodily infirmity, but patient, submissive, and 
 thankful. I often leave the vicarage, and bend my steps to 
 this lonely pilgrim, where, seated in an old broken chair by 
 her little fire of dried sticks, we talk of Christ and what he has 
 done for us both, and of our happy prospects, till my heart is 
 soothed and refreshed, and the dear redeemed old saint unites 
 her praises with mine. 
 
 " The church is romantically situated on a rising ground, 
 which looks down on the village below, and commands a beau- 
 tiful prospect of the surrounding country. It is skirted with 
 large and beautiful trees, which overshadow the graves of the 
 many dead who sleep here until the resurrection day. It is a 
 pleasant retreat for contemplation. I often sit here, and turn 
 my eyes from the dead lying at my feet, to the various rural 
 occupations of the living beyond, and some are seen milking 
 the cows, feeding the lambs, or mowing the grass ; others, in 
 the distance, are gathering in and stacking the hay, while the 
 sun setting in rich splendour, imparts animation and loveliness 
 to the whole. Oh, that men would praise the Lord for His 
 goodness ! And oh, that these things did more elevate my 
 heart to Him, the Giver of all good ! And yet, after all, this 
 is not my rest, blessed be God. 
 
 " I have just returned from a visit to my poor pilgrim. I 
 walked softly in, and found her with her glasses on, attentively 
 reading a book she had upon her lap. ' What are you read- 
 ing ? ' I inquired. ' The Shepherd, ma'am ; the Shepherd who 
 laid down his life for the sheep,' looking up into my face with 
 an expression of sweet peace and content. I replied, ' Yes, 
 and for you and for me too, if we are His sheep.' It was one 
 of the sermons of the good old divine I mentioned, and the 
 dear aged saint was feasting upon the precious, sterling truths 
 it contained. I found another excellent work in her rich li- 
 brary : ' Boston's Four-fold State.' I said, ' Have you dined ? ' 
 'Yes.' 'What have you had?' 'Boiled milk.' This, I 
 found, was her chief diet ; and oh, how happy she is ! She 
 says she is happier than the rich or the mighty in their palaces, 
 and from my heart I beheve it. The squire is kind to her, 
 and has lent her a little garden in a field, which her attentive 
 and dutiful son cultivates for her." 
 
 " I went last evening to see another aged pilgrim ; but mark 
 7 
 
146 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 the diflference. This good woman ^for I have little doubt but 
 that she is one) is abounding with all the comforts of life. 
 She is a widow, w^ith two industrious sons, and one kind 
 daughter. She has a nice house, comfortable farm, and every- 
 thing to make her happy. But she is f;ir from being so. For 
 although I believe her to be a child of God, she is constantly 
 harassed with the idea that she has grieved away the Spirit, 
 and will be lost for ever. This, I believe, has arisen from bad 
 teaching and disease of body. I have endeavoured to cheer 
 her up by leading her to look more fully to Christ than to her- 
 self. I sat with her last evening for nearly an hour, and found 
 it refreshing to my soul to speak of Jesus." 
 
 " E writes me that he has had two boroughs offered to 
 
 him, but I have urged him not to stand. The country is in a 
 state of ferment at present. The new accession to the throne 
 involves a new Parliament, and the Tories are straining every 
 point to secure as many Conservatives as possible. In the 
 
 evening G drove me in his phaeton to Alexton Hall, 
 
 where we took tea with Mrs. W , who was alone. We 
 
 had a long conversation on religion and Christian experience, 
 and stayed until a late hour. What a mercy that Jesus is 
 everything to me ! Truly in Him I live, and move, and have 
 my being. He is around about my path by day and by night, 
 and my soul rejoices in God my Saviour. The sun is just set- 
 ting, and looks beautiful as it casts its fading beams upon the 
 tall trees and green fields ere it bids us good-night. The birds, 
 too, are chirping their evening song before they fold their lit- 
 tle heads beneath their wing for rest. 
 
 ' The ploughman homeward plods his weary way, 
 And leaves the world to darkness and to me.' 
 
 So I learned in younger days at school. Nearly a dozen have 
 just passed the garden gate, each with a bundle of sticks upon 
 his shoulders, to kindle a cheerful blaze when he gets home, 
 ere he lays his jaded limbs to rest. The sleep of a labouring 
 man is sweet. 
 
 " Here and there I find a humble soul in a thatched cottage, 
 who but few know, but who are the lowly and hidden fol- 
 lower's of the meek and despised Saviour. I rode on horse- 
 back the other day to the adjoining village ; and while G 
 
 went on some miles further, I alighted at a good man's dwel- 
 ling, the front of which was covered with roses trailed up 
 
VILLAGE SCENES. 147 
 
 against the wall, and went in, and passed two or three hours 
 with him and his aged wife very happily. They offered me 
 the best their house afforded, which was a glass of cowslip 
 wine. I seated myself on their sofa in a nice little parlour, 
 where everything indicated neatness and industry, with a wide 
 window in front, of small panes of glass, but tastefully orna- 
 mented with clusters of fresh-blown roses on the outside. Here 
 I sat and talked of Christ, while the dear old man (his eyes 
 filled with tears) echoed to his wife, who was deaf, what I had 
 said to him from time to time. I had much profitable conver- 
 sation with them. The good man said at parting, ' Oh, ma'am, 
 you do not know how comforting this visit has been to me.' 
 
 When G returned, I mounted my horse, promising to see 
 
 them again, and galloped home to the vicarage." 
 
 "Yesterday was the Sabbath. G preached an excel- 
 lent discourse. He took for his subject the anxiety of Zac- 
 cheus to see Jesus as he passed by. He drew some excellent 
 
 ideas from it, and the application was good. Dear E has 
 
 been greatly blessed in her labours in the school. Her thorough 
 and effective method of discipline, blended with so much win- 
 ning softness, has produced a complete revolution for the bet- 
 ter. You can form no idea how promptly the children obey, 
 and yet how tenderly they love her. She has, with the aid of 
 the mistress, made the mode of instruction so interesting, that 
 the parents could not, if they were so inclined, detain their 
 children at home. Yesterday they were brought to the vicar- 
 age, and underwent a private examination previous to the 
 
 pubHc one, which takes place next week. G examined 
 
 them on two chapters of the Bible ; and it was pleasing to hear 
 how well they answered, while his observations were instruc- 
 tive and solemn. They then sung their hymns, accompanied 
 
 by E on the piano. The chapters on which they were 
 
 questioned were the 18th and 19th of the Gospel of John : and 
 as I sat in an adjoining room, listening to the sufferings of the 
 Redeemer, and the unheard-of ignominy heaped upon the 
 matchless Son of God, the effect on my mind was such that I 
 could not recover my spirits the whole evening," 
 
 " G 's ministry seems much blessed. There is in his 
 
 preaching a rich savour of the Divinity of Christ. He insists 
 constantly and earnestly upon the Godhead of Jesus, as the 
 'everlasting Father,' as 'the mighty God;' and this imparts 
 such strength and consolation to the soul, that my heart has 
 often been refreshed in a way that I little expected " 
 
148 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 " ' How sweet,' as dear Mrs. Winslow* 
 expressions of love from strangers, who show them, not for our 
 sakes, but for Christ's sake.' It emanates from the fulness of 
 His love. All the affection of Christian friends is the result 
 of His overflowing heart — ^just as the beams which scatter 
 light and Avarmth around us flow from the sun, the great centre. 
 He inclines them to love us, and do us good for His sake. I 
 have felt to-day much blessedness in viewing the Lord as my 
 own and only Friend on earth and in heaven ; and making a 
 renewed surrender of my whole heart to Him, desiring above 
 all earthly good that it should be moulded according to His 
 will, and made conformable to His likeness. I feel much of 
 the blessedness of one who is emptied of all confidence in him- 
 self, feeling there is nothing in him of his own, but Avhat he 
 hates, who yet in the midst of all this poverty finds he has a 
 store of incalculable riches in another, and that one is God in 
 our nature — the God-man. Christ is everything to me — I 
 could not live without Him, I could not die without Him, and 
 heaven would be no heaven to me, if my Beloved were not 
 there." 
 
 "Dear , I think your trials have been sanctified to me, 
 
 as well as to yourself; for they have kept me in close contact 
 with God, and have brought me into more of His real charac- 
 ter, not only as to what He is to His redeemed, but also as to 
 what He is in Himself. Is He a good God ? He is goodness. 
 Is His name love ? He is love. Is He faithful ? He is faith- 
 fulness. Is He the true God ? He is truth^ and therefore 
 cannot lie." 
 
 After spending thus happily and profitably some months at 
 Tugby, she left amidst the general and affectionate regrets of 
 the kind-hearted villagers. One of her letters thus pictures 
 the parting scene : — 
 
 " We left Tugby, followed by a weeping tribe of the chil- 
 dren and cottagers. You would have supposed they were 
 parting with the dearest friend on earth. The school was 
 let out sooner than usual, to bid us good-bye at the Vicar- 
 age ; and although most of them were forbidden to follow, 
 when we reached the turnpike-gate they were there, and 
 
 E was surrounded with tears from the young, and with 
 
 blessings from the old. There we left the girls ; but at the 
 
 * Mrs. Harriet Winslow, of the American Mission in Ceylon. 
 
SERIOUS ILLNESS. 149 
 
 end of the field there was another cluster waiting to say good- 
 bye, and the boys ran after the carriage as far as they could. I 
 have never before seen such an exhibition of tender feeling and 
 afiection from people who but a few months ago were perfect 
 strangers." 
 
 On her return to town, she was seized with the prevailing 
 epidemic which carried off so many hundreds, but in mercy 
 her valuable life was spared, God having yet a work to 
 accomplish in and by her. 
 
 "Since I last wrote I have been very near eternity, but the 
 Lord rebuked the fever, and I am able to sit up for a few 
 minutes at a time. It was the influenza in its most powerful 
 form. The Lord, out of His own kind heart, put kindness in 
 all around me. My mind, during those few days and nights 
 of suffering, was in a very peculiar state. I could not pray, 
 or even think. I could only say, and at intervals, 'Lord, 
 have mercy upon me, and heal me.' The whole power of 
 mind seemed prostrated at once. I thought, Oh, if I had left 
 the salvation of my soul to this moment, I should have been 
 lost. Good Mr. D. once ventured to inquire the state of my 
 mind, I recollect saying, 'It is in a cloud, but my hope does 
 not depend upon my feelings, but upon Christ, upon God.' 
 
 "While I sit writing, I see opposite to me two mutes stand- 
 ing at a door. It is the funeral of an individual who died of 
 the same disease from w^hich a gracious God has raised me up. 
 He was a healthy man, but death had a commission, and he 
 has appeared before the judgment-seat of Christ. I, like the 
 barren fig-tree, have been spared a little longer, through the 
 intercession of a precious Saviour, that I may bring forth more 
 fruit to His glory. I have just sent a note of inquiry to dear 
 
 Mrs. R , for I feel anxious to know how they are. Every 
 
 day will appear a year to them as the time draws near for their 
 return to IBrooklyn. God grant they may find all well at 
 home, and then it will be a happy time indeed, I think it is 
 good sometimes to leave those we love, that we may taste the 
 sweetness of meeting again. How many of these happy 
 meetings have I had in my time ! It is almost all over now\ 
 But, oh! the meeting in heaven! that w411 be the best of all. 
 Oh, may God, in His rich mercy, grant that I may meet all, 
 all that He has given me, and all I love on earth, at His right 
 hand at that great day, I know you will say, Amen and 
 amen !" 
 
150 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 How heart searching and solemn, yet how true and precious, 
 are the following thoughts: — 
 
 " I have often thought that, although God did so convince 
 you of sin as to make you flee into the very bosom of Christ, 
 yet you have never been led much into the depth of the 
 hidden evil. You have still to be led into the great chamber 
 of imagery. Oh, the aboundings of sin there which no eye 
 discerneth but God's until He, by increasing light, declares it 
 to us little by little ! How have I to mourn and weep before 
 Him, while He shows me to myself — poor, wretched, sinful, 
 and yet washed and justified from all things ! What can I say 
 to these tilings? Love abounding, — grace subduing, — blood- 
 cleansing, — Jesus pardoning, — the Spirit renewing, — God re- 
 conciled; and all this mighty work for one so vile, so worth- 
 less, so hell-deserving ! Dear , watch, as with a jealous 
 
 eye for God's glory, every hidden spring of action. Look to 
 your thoughts and motives; and while you do this, keep your 
 eye upon the cross of Christ, and you need not fear to see 
 yourself as you are. Tliis is the Spirit's w^ork alone, and this 
 only Avill make us go softly all our days." 
 
 The tender and prayerful interest with which she viewed 
 the accession of the present Sovereign to the throne, was in 
 beautiful keeping with the benevolent feelings of her spiritual 
 and enlarged mind. Called, in the providence of God, to a 
 position of great responsibility, and at an age so tender, the 
 young Queen became an object of her liveliest and holiest 
 sympathies. Frequently has she been known to pour forth 
 the most fervent intercessions on her behalf, especially praying 
 that, next to her own personal interest in the salvation of God, 
 she might have grace vouchsafed faithfully to maintain the true 
 Protestantism of this land. She also formed one of a little circle 
 of Christian ladies who, in different places, and at a given time, 
 met in concert to pray for their Queen. In one of her letters, 
 she relates this touching incident of the youthful Sovereign : — 
 
 "Just as the Princess Victoria came of age, the King was 
 suddenly taken ill, and a few weeks after died. I heard an 
 interesting anecdote of the young Queen. The first death- 
 warrant that Lord Melbourne presented for her signature, she 
 said, 'And must I sign it?' and burst into tears. He replied, 
 'Your Majesty has the power of mitigating the sentence to 
 transportation for life.' She instantly exclaimed, 'Oh, then, 
 let it be ; and transport him.' This looked lovely." 
 
THE QUEEN. 151 
 
 Her Christianity was liiglily perceptive, and her religious 
 character, consequently, singularly practical. It was the testi- 
 mony of David, when referring to his own experience, "I 
 esteem all thy precepts to be right." Such, in truth, might 
 have been her language of wliom we speak. With an en- 
 larged heart, she ran the Avay of God's commandments, finding 
 in their keeping great reward. But there was especially one 
 divine precept by whose clear and holy light she conscientiously 
 and undeviatingly walked ; the apostolic injunction, " Owe no 
 man anything^'" was the precept to which we refer. It was 
 her principle never to incur debt, upon any pretence or under 
 any circumstances whatever. She would make no purchase 
 which she was not prepared to meet, and was always uneasy 
 in the recollection of the smallest claim undischarged. And 
 when deprived of affluence, and combating with limited re- 
 sources, a large and expensive family dependent upon her, she 
 had the strength of character and the grace of heart never at 
 any period to allow her expenditure to exceed her income. It 
 was thus the grace of God enabled her to guide her affairs 
 with discretion, and to provide things honestly, not only in 
 the sight of the Lord, but also in the sight of m^en. By a 
 strict, conscientious observance of this divine rule, she was 
 not only enabled to "render unto all their due," but also to 
 contribute liberally of her substance to the cause of God, and 
 to the necessities of Christ's flock. She refers to this subject 
 in the following extract: — 
 
 "28th. was speaking to me about purchasing a ; 
 
 but I really thought that, under existing circumstances, it had 
 better not be. A thing like this, which one might do without, 
 ought to be let alone. That sweet precept which God laid 
 upon my heart in the commencement of my dreary widowhood, 
 He has enabled me strictly to keep: Owe no man anything^ 
 hut to love one another. If in debt, which I never allowed 
 myself to be, I should have thought nothing was at my own 
 disposal until I had honestly paid that debt. I have endeav- 
 oured faithfully to impress the same upon the minds of all my 
 children, entreating them rather to live on the lowliest fare 
 than incur claims which they have no power to meet. It is 
 as much a command of God as any other, and woe be to us if 
 we disobey it. God will chasten us if we do; and we shall 
 find that what is withheld, justly due to another, He is able to 
 take from us, and make the sweetest ingredient of our cup 
 
152 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 bitter as gall. Let us -walk in this lioly precept of the gospel, 
 and there is then nothing to fear. Let us often look back upon 
 all the way our God has led us, and trace His gracious dealings 
 at every step; and we shall not only acknowledge that He is 
 good, but we shall aim more and more to do everything that 
 is right and pleasing in His sight. Oh, for more grace, more 
 uprightness of heart, and more singleness of eye ! It is with 
 God we have to do, and not with man." 
 
 " Dec. 24th. — I have to recount the goodness and unfailing 
 mercy of my good and gracious God, who has brought me 
 thus far on my weary pilgrimage. I have to lament my un 
 faithfulness and backslidings of heart from Him. This has 
 been a year full of especial mercies. Yet I do not feel my 
 heart, as I could wish, going out towards God. I desire the 
 renewed anointing of the Holy Ghost, and am looking up for 
 this blessing. Nothing can satisfy me without it. An 
 indwelling God ; the water springing up into eternal life ; the 
 constant and abiding presence of Christ, — this is what I want, 
 and for this I pray." 
 
 "Jan. 26th. — Feel much nearness to God. Can tell Him 
 all that is in my heart, — all my wants, — and feel that Jesus 
 hears me. I am directed to carry my small as well as great 
 things to Christ ; everything that troubles, be it what it may. 
 Satan contends with me here, so that at times I feel almost 
 ashamed of troubling the God of heaven with such poor trifles; 
 but I recollect that a sparrow falls not to the ground without 
 His notice, and I am encouraged : God gives me faith, and I 
 conquer the arch-enemy of souls." 
 
 "The way to God has seemed to me of late so dehghtful, so 
 exactly suited to a poor lost sinner, — so suited to me. A way 
 sprinkled with atoning blood ; justice and mercy as a wall of 
 defence on either side ; and this way leading to such a rich 
 treasure-house, filled with all blessing for time and for eternity. 
 All is in Jesus the way to God, the way of holiness, the way 
 to glory. 
 
 " Sweet the moments, rich in blessing, 
 Which before the cross I spend ; 
 Life, and healtli, and peace possessing, 
 Prom the sinner's dying Friend." 
 
 "16th. — The dear Redeemer continues to lift up upon me 
 the light of his countenance. But with all this matchless love, 
 
CHRISTIAN EXPERIENCE DEVELOPED. 153 
 
 I have been, and still am, tried with earthly wa.ndering thoughts. 
 While in the body we cannot escape the worid ; though clois- 
 tered from it, the god of this world would still follow and 
 harass us as much as he is permitted, in order to show us our 
 weakness, and the long-sufiering patience of our God towards 
 us." 
 
 "Feb. 29th. — Yesterday I completed my sixty-second year. 
 Few and evil have been the days of the years of my pilgrim- 
 age. To Jacob's words I can add this testimony, — goodness 
 and mercy have followed me all my days, and I am longing 
 to praise and bless His holy name, who has done great things 
 for me and mine, although we have not returned Him accord- 
 ing to His goodness. I look back, and sigh, and grieve, and 
 think how many evils I could have avoided with my present 
 experience. I think and feel more and more the exceeding 
 sinfulness of sin, and my own w^eakness and inability to stand 
 one moment without the all-upholding arm of Jehovah-Jesus. 
 How needful are trials, and how precious then the sweet prom- 
 ises of the gospel ! " 
 
 " It is wondrous bow God, when we wander from Ilim, 
 Our fears and afflictions can double ; 
 And then comfort impart to tlie sorrowful hearty 
 That we never could know but in trouble. 
 
 " Thus faith in the dark, is pursuing its mark 
 Through many sharp trials of love, 
 In this sorrowful waste which the Christian must pass 
 To the heavenly Canaan above." 
 
 " 22nd. — God is love, and His mercy endureth forever : this 
 my soul knows to be true. I w ould be holy, even as He is 
 holy. My heart longs for full sanctification. I am wearied 
 with sin ; my soul loathes it, and I abhor myself in dust and 
 in ashes. Truly, I tuould not live alway. Heaven would be 
 greatly to be desired, were it only to have done w4th sin for 
 ever. But oh, the presence of Jesus in all His glories, unveil- 
 ed to our wondering eye, will make our happiness complete. 
 earth, earth ! let my heart's best affections go, and trouble 
 me no more. I want this heart only for Christ ! It is His by 
 the purchase of His blood ; it is His by the conquest of His 
 grace ; and I covet it all for Him. Oh, that every throb may 
 beat with love, gratitude, and adoration to Him who has saved 
 my soul, and redeemed me from the power of the enemy ! 
 Amen and amen." 
 7* 
 
154: MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 •' I would not live alway — live alway below I 
 
 Oh no, I'll not linger when bidden to go. 
 
 The days of our pilgrimao-e granted us here 
 
 Are enough for life's woes, full enough for its cheer. 
 
 Would I shrink from the path which the prophets of God, 
 
 Apostles and Martyrs, so joyfully trod ! 
 
 "While brethren and friends are all hastening home, 
 
 Like a spirit unblest o'er the earth would I roam ? 
 
 *' I would not live alway — I ask not to stay, 
 Where storm after storm rises dark o'er the way ; 
 Where, seeking for peace, we but hover around, 
 Like the patriarch's bird, and no resting is found ; 
 Where hope, when she paints her gay bow in the air. 
 Leaves its brilliance to fade in the night of despair, 
 And joy's fleeting angel ne'er sheds a glad ray. 
 Save the gleam of the plumage that bears him away. 
 
 " I would not live alway — thus fettered by sin. 
 Temptation without and corruption within ; 
 In a moment of strength, if I sever the chain, 
 Scarce the victory's mine ere I'm captive again. 
 E'en the rapture of pardon is mingled with fears, 
 And my cup of thanksgiving with penitent tears. 
 The festival trump calls for jubilant songs, 
 But my spirit her own miserere prolongs. 
 
 " I would not live alway — no, welcome the tomb ! 
 Since Jesus hath lain there, I dread not its gloom ; 
 Where He deign'd to sleep. I'll too bow my head ; 
 Oh ! peaceful the slumbers on that hallow'd bed. 
 And then the glad dawn soon to follow that night, 
 When the sunrise of glory shall beam on my sight, 
 When the full matin song, as the sleepers arise 
 To shout in the morning, shall peal through the skies. 
 
 " Who, who would live alway— away from his God, 
 Away from yon heaven, that blissful abode, 
 Where the rivers of pleasure flow o'er the bright plains, 
 And the noontide of glory eternally reigns ; 
 Where the saints of all ages in harmony meet. 
 Their Saviour and brethren transported to greet; 
 Where the songs of salvation exultingly roll, 
 And the smile of the Lord is the feast of the soul ; 
 
 " That heavenly music ! what is it I hear? 
 The notes of the harpers ring sweet in the air ; 
 And see, soft unfolding, those portals of gold ! 
 The King, all array'd in his beauty, behold ! 
 Oh, give me, oh, give me the wings of a dove, 
 Let me hasten my flight to those mansions above. 
 Ay, 'tis now that my soul on swift pinions would soar, 
 And in ecstasy bid earth adieu evermore." 
 
 Rev. Dr. Muhlkxbtjrg. 
 
MRS. HAWKES. — MR. CECIL. — MR. NEWTON. 155 
 
 TO HER SON 0- 
 
 "... If you can obtain the Memoir of Mrs. Hawkes, writ- 
 ten by Miss Cecil, do so, and read it. It is republished in 
 America, with an Introduction, I think, by Washington Irving. 
 Miss Cecil is a delightful Christian. I had a long interview 
 with her after I read the book. To-day I called on her, and 
 was introduced in the drawing-room, and sat in the very chair 
 where good Mr. Cecil, Newton, and Simeon once sat. It is 
 the same house which Mr. Cecil occupied for forty or fifty 
 years, and around the walls are hung numerous portraits of 
 good men, his and Mr. Newton's among the rest. It was a 
 treat of no ordinary kind, — a feast of the soul. These are 
 now before the throne in glory. Once they were like us, tried, 
 tempted, and often sorrowing ; but now they are reaping the 
 rich reward of all their labours." 
 
 "I smiled at your idea of my arranging my thoughts on 
 given subjects when I address my children. Why, I never 
 know what I am going to write, until I take up my pen, and 
 then I give full licence to my ideas as they flow ; and, as it 
 happens, the Lord seems to direct ; for I believe in general, — 
 at least so some of my correspondents say, — what I write 
 comes just in season; but let that be as it may, it comes in 
 season from my heart. Once formality shows its ugly phiz, 
 away would go all I would wish to say. When I write to 
 Christians in trial, I am often comforted with the comfort I am 
 endeavouring to impart to others. The same in conversation. 
 Were I a minister, perhaps this would be my favourite sub- 
 ject. But the Lord has not called me to chat office, so you 
 must take me just as you find me ; for I am too old now to mend 
 my ways in that respect ; but I will try and bear in mind what 
 
 you say when I write to . Pray will you choose a text 
 
 for me when I next write to you ,^" 
 
 "I have been feasting upon the memoir of Dr. Payson, He 
 seems, however, to have looked too much to frames and feel' 
 ings, and as they ebbed and flowed, his faith did the same, 
 and this caused him so much distress, and wore out his health. 
 Sensible enjoyments are very desirable, but they are not 
 Christ. Faith in the dark puts honour on God, and the more 
 we know of His faithfulness, the more will cur peace flow as 
 a river that never changes its course, ^here is al-svays SQme» 
 thing wrong when He hides I^is face j but, after all, He re' 
 
156 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 mains the same, and we must come to Him again as poor 
 sinners. If we confess our sins, He is faitlful and just to for- 
 give us 6ur sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. Con- 
 fession of sin is a liolj strengthening exercise, and brings a 
 sweet blessing to the soul. Never let us keep guilt upon the 
 conscience. The Fountain is always open to us; and we 
 should not leave a throne of grace until we have a sense of 
 pardon through the fresh application of his blood. Have no 
 concealments from God." 
 
 " 25th. — Such a sermon from Mr. Evans ! His mind is 
 gigantic, and so deeply spiritual. The world to him is noth- 
 ing, and God first and everything. He lives near the Lord, 
 and cares neither for the frown nor the smile of man. His 
 ministry has been much blessed to me of late. He has just 
 
 parted with C , who sailed for India on last Saturday. 
 
 His trial — and a great trial it was — lias been sanctified to his 
 soul ; and he preaches like a man standing on the verge of 
 eternity, and in full view of heaven. He has fled into the 
 bosom of God for consolation, and has found it." 
 
 " 4th, — I wish you would always write on the Monday, and 
 then I should know how the Lord dealt with you on the Sab- 
 bath. We had a feast of fat things yesterday. I think Mr. 
 E. preaches more of late as if he looked full into eternity, and 
 saw the great white throne. He is solemn, powerful, and 
 often awfully true. But I must prepare for my Bible class, 
 which I have in my room. They all seem interested, and it is 
 quite encouraging. "We are going on with the 'Pilgrim's Pro- 
 gress.' I trust I had sweet nearness to God this morning in 
 family worship. I was reading the history of Asa and Je- 
 hoshaphat, and could trace the character of God in His deal- 
 ings with them, as well as His general conduct with the Old 
 Testament saints, that it seemed to establish my soul in the 
 truth, enabling me to feel that He was all that He says He 
 is, and the same yesterday, to-day, and forever. Oh, tliat we 
 may walk uprightly before Him, and watch against the treach- 
 erous foe we carry within !" 
 
 TO HER SON, REV. I. D, W , ON MINISTERIAL WORK. 
 
 " . . , I long to hear how you are, and whether the Lord 
 is blessing you with His presence : without it this ^^'orld is a 
 desolate wilderness indeed, I fear you will find it lonesome 
 where you are; but if the Lord gives you plenty of work to 
 
MINISTERIAL WORK. 157 
 
 do for himself, He will give you a sweet reward for your 
 labour, and a contented mind with your lot. If you feel you 
 are put where Jesus would have you to be, how sweet will be 
 the thought ! It will repress every wish to be elsewhere. 
 How delightful to live to please Him, and Him only, who 
 died for you ! I have been just praying for you, and the Lord 
 blessedly drew my heart out. I have prayed that you may 
 feel increasingly the vast responsibility that rests upon you as 
 a messenger of the Lord of Hosts, and that you may continu- 
 ally have an eye to that great day when you must render up 
 the account of your stewardship. Oh that you may hear 
 those blessed words. Well done good and faithful servant ! I 
 asked the Lord, too, to speak to you, and to speak through 
 you to the people. Remember, before you fix your mind upon 
 a text, to go upon your knees and ask your Master for one. If 
 He gives you one, He will speak by it to you and your flock. 
 Oh, you know not what a blessing will always attend this 
 childlike faith in your heavenly Father. Be much in search- 
 ing the Scriptures, for, in so doing, you will find rich food for 
 your own soul, and for the flock over which the Holy Ghost 
 hath made you overseer. If you have only a dozen poor 
 people, never let it be a temptation to be less earnest and fer- 
 vent in your preaching. If you watch the wind, you will not 
 sow ; but keep your eye upon the Lord of the harvest, and 
 do His work faithfully, and He will give you your hire. And 
 may God bless you and make you a blessing ! " 
 
 To some individuals the deep searchings of heart, in which 
 she was wont to indulge, will appear almost painful. But 
 those searchings marked the honesty with which she ever 
 sought to walk before God. And yet the lowliest estimate she 
 entertained of herself was always accompanied with the most 
 exalted views of Christ, and the clearest apprehension of her 
 completeness in Him. She grew downward, and so brought 
 forth fruit upward. Like the banyan-tree, whose branches 
 first strike down into the earth and then shoot up again, she 
 sank into a deep consciousness of her helplessness and depend- 
 ence, and then, as from the lowest depths of self-humiliation, 
 she rose strong in faith, glowing with love, and clinging all the 
 more closely to the Saviour. Such would seem to be her ex- 
 perience, as thus portrayed : — 
 
 "A note from , inviting me to meet a minister and his 
 
 wife who were on a visit to them. But I do not feel in spirits 
 
158 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 to meet strangers. I need a refreshing myself, and blessed be 
 God, He has melted my heart this morning with sweet con- 
 trition, blended with holy joy, and an increasing desire to live 
 to Him and for Him, w4io is all and everything to my soul. 
 Oh, if He were to turn from me, I am lost for ever. This 
 world, with the dearest earthly creatures, could not satisfy my 
 soul. And oh, to call the Creator, the Upholder of all worlds, 
 mine — yes, inhie, for I am His, and He is mine, and that 
 through all eternity — is a privilege so sweet tliat angels might 
 envy. And is it boasting to speak boldly of these things? 
 And yet I have been convinced, on examination, that in what 
 I have felt it a duty and a delight to tell of His great good- 
 ness, there was much of self — hateful self — insensibly, at the 
 time, that has laid me low in the dust before God. For this 
 cause I do not like to meet wath strangers who have heard of 
 me from dear friends, who themselves are willing to overlook 
 ten thousand infirmities and imperfections, because they love 
 me. They do not know me as I know m.yself, and as God 
 knows me. And I can truly say, that it is my unspeakable 
 comfort that He does know me altogether. I would not have 
 one thing liidden from Him, which He in love hides from the 
 world. Oh, the praise due to His restraining grace! 
 
 " Last evening I heard a stranger. His text was singular. 
 And Adam called his icife's name Eve, because she was the 
 mother of all living. He remarked, that as soon as Adam and 
 his wife ate the fruit, in disobedience to God's command, they 
 died — spiritually died. God preached the gospel to them 
 while in this awful state, and by the light of His Spirit they 
 were enabled to believe in the promised seed that was to 
 bruise the serpent's head. He first showed how much all 
 names then had a significant meaning. Thus, God changed 
 Abram to Abraham, because he was the father of the faithful. 
 Jacob's name was changed to Israel, because, as a friend, he 
 had power and prevailed with God. Eve was the mother of 
 all living, who, like herself, were made alive in Christ Jesus. 
 The seed of the serpent could not have been included, as they 
 were always dead, dead in trespasses and in sins. Christ M-as 
 the seed of the woman, and all the members of the body, of 
 which He was the head, were alive in him. Of these Eve 
 was the mother, for she was the living mother of all made 
 alive in Christ Jesus, This sermon was full of Christ through- 
 out." 
 
MINISTERIAL RESPONSIBILITY. 159 
 
 " Heard Mr. E on Tuesday evening. Ought I not to 
 
 grow in grace, and in the knowledge of God my Saviour ? 
 But oh, how slowly I advance to what I ought ! One thing I 
 do know, — I feel increasingly my own vileness, and see in- 
 creasing beauty in the gospel, and its suitableness to the wants 
 of a poor sinner. God shows me more of my own sinful self, 
 and more of that perfect righteousness in Christ Jesus, which 
 is unto all and upon all them that believe." 
 
 " Have you seen ' Mammon,' by the Rev. Mr, Harris ? It 
 is excellent. The next best essay on the subject was by a 
 policeman, who wrote it while on his rounds in the night, and 
 by the light of the lamp. Mr. Baptist Noel has just sent out 
 a tract on the ' Unity of the Church.' It is delightful. There 
 has been such a demand for it, that I could not obtain a copy 
 from the publisher to send you. How needful both to Church 
 man and Nonconformist is such a work just now, when the 
 members of Christ's body are warring against each other, — 
 brother against brother, and that before unbelievers. May 
 God bless this work to His church, and raise up many such 
 faithful heralds of the cross, to warn their brethren of their 
 evil ways ! " 
 
 TO HER SON, REV. G. E. W , ON MINISTERIAL 
 
 RESPONSIBILITY. 
 
 " . . . Yesterday was the Sabbath, and you, I trust, 
 were standing up in your great Master's name, to declare the 
 whole truth as it is in Jesus, The more I think upon it, the 
 more I feel the vast, the weighty responsibility that rests upon 
 the minister of Christ. I look through a series of years, short 
 and uncertain, to the judgment-seat, and there behold him 
 the first to render an account of his stewardship. Oh, the tre- 
 mendous responsibility — the care of precious and immortal 
 souls ! And when I remember that I have three now stand- 
 ing in this all-important position, I feel a trembling lest any of 
 you should come short at last. ' Be faithful unto death.' Be- 
 ware lest you speak peace when God has not spoken peace. 
 Oh, think of a poor, deceived soul, going into eternity, fancy- 
 ing all is well, and the minister helping on the fatal delusion 
 from want of faithfulness and obedience to the command of 
 his God. Shrink not from duty, however painful. Let all 
 things be right between you and God, It would be well to 
 make a report of each day's work to God ; and although you 
 
160 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 may have failed in many things, and have come short in al^ 
 you will yet find this daily exercise sweet and profitable. li 
 will preserve tenderness of conscience, and have a sanctifying 
 influence upon the heart. Never forget for one moment 
 whose you are or whom you serve ; and may the love of 
 Christ constrain you to diligence and devotedness of heart." 
 
 Who does not feel, as he closes the preceding extracts from 
 her letters to her children, how powerful and deathless is the 
 influence of a holy mother ! That influence employed in 
 planting the first seedlings of thought, in shaping the first ac- 
 tions of childhood, still lives to instruct, admonish, and cheer 
 in manhood's riper years. Honoured and privileged are they, 
 around whose toilsome path yet lingers a spell so sacred, a 
 power so gentle, and a charm so holy and persuasive. The 
 sepulchre has closed in silence over her ; but her inspiration, 
 vital, and balmy as the breath of spring, still floats over life's 
 dreary way, gladdening, moulding, and guiding. Thus is it 
 that Christianity ennobles, sanctifies, and immortalizes all the 
 endeared relations of life. Beneath its embalming power the 
 parental relation never dies. The authority to which as chil- 
 dren we bowed so submissively, in later life, when the snow- 
 flakes of time have frosted our brow, still lives to sway ; and 
 the maternal influence which shaped our youthful step, yet 
 holds us in its deathless enchantment. 
 
 TO HER SON . 
 
 " March 14th. — Lord L is expected in town to-mor- 
 row. He has just lost his second daughter, a most interesting 
 and amiable girl of fifteen. She died a week ago, in Paris. 
 I grieve and sympathize with him as a parent. He never left 
 her bedside, and deeply feels her loss. I pray for him, and 
 desire that his heart may be sustained, and his affliction may 
 be sanctified. On "Wednesday morning, Mr. Evans preached, 
 in Rowland Hill's pulpit, the annual sermon for the Baptist 
 Missionary Society. He was most excellent. Surrey Chapel 
 was excessively crowded. His people met at six o'clock that 
 morning, for prayer on his behalf. Previous to his undertak- 
 ing this service, he had entered with much earnestness into 
 the missionary cause, and regrets he had so long stood aloof 
 from it; and now it occupies much of his thoughts and 
 labours ; in fact, it has enlisted his whole heart. This even- 
 ing they meet in John street, to form a missionary auxih- 
 ary." 
 
MRS. HARRIET WINSLOW. 161 
 
 A reference in the foregoing extract suggests the remark, 
 that it is always interesting to trace an important result to its 
 cause. The strong sympathy with which the subject of 
 Christian missions was now regarded by Mr. Ev^ans, appears 
 to have been in a great measure awakened by the perusal of 
 the "Memoir of Mrs. Harriet Winslow," the eminent and be- 
 loved American missionary to Ceylon. Having received a 
 copy from New York, Mrs. Winslow brought it nnder the 
 notice of her pastor in the following letter, addressed to the 
 second Mrs. E. : — 
 
 "... My dear Friend, I want you to get the memoir 
 of dear Mrs. Winslow, the missionary who died not long ago 
 in India. It will do you good. She was a most devoted 
 woman, and bright example. I have read it with deep inter- 
 est. She knew your dear sister in India, and corresponded 
 with her. Your brother's name is also mentioned, I think 
 that, next to the Bible, the lives of God's dear people, their 
 Christian experience, and the dealings of God with their souls, 
 is most profitable. It stirs one up to diligence, and to press 
 forward to great things. I have felt more than ever, since I 
 read the labours of this dear saint, what a poor unprofitable 
 servant I am, and have been led to cry to the Lord for more 
 of the mighty influence of His Holy Spirit. Mrs. Winslow 
 mentions the Maternal Association formed in India, and God's 
 especial blessing upon it in answer to praying mothers. You 
 will see, too, that revivals are not confined to America, but 
 are wherever God gives a wrestling spirit for them, and His 
 people are looking out for the fulfilment of His promise. It 
 has very greatly delighted me to see how Christians of differ- 
 ent denominations live and cling together when away from 
 home, and feel they are engaged in one common cause. The 
 Church of England, Presbyterians, Baptists, Wesleyan mis- 
 sionaries, all aiding each other in this blessed work and labour 
 of love. Oh, for hearts full of the love of Christ ! " 
 
 She again more distinctly refers to the happy influence of 
 this beautiful and soul-stirring missionary biography, in a letter 
 to her daughter-in-law : — 
 
 " . . . I rejoice, my dear A , that you are both 
 
 comfortable and happy, and believe that you are where the 
 Lord would have you be. Oh, that you may return accord- 
 ing to His great goodness, and trace His dear hand in all His 
 tender, gentle deahngs. Walk doubly close to Him in the day 
 
162 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 of prosperity, and watch over your heart with a jealous eye, 
 lest it prove a temptation and a snare. Time is short. You 
 have mucli, my dear daughter, to do for God in a little space. 
 Eternity will be quite long enough to rest. Now is the time 
 for honouring God ; and you may be a great help to your hus- 
 band in the ministry of the blessed word. Oh, that God may 
 keep 3^ou both faithful to His work. Read dear Mrs. Harriet 
 Winslow's memoir. I am sure it will do you good. It was 
 sent to me and I lent it to others. Mr. Evans says he cannot 
 be thankful enougli that I ever placed it in his hands. It has 
 made him quite an ardent missionary at home. John-street is 
 now a missionary church ; and already one of their own num- 
 ber is going forth to carry the glad tidings of the gospel to the 
 heathen." 
 
 Few brighter jewels will adorn Harriet Winslow's crown 
 than this.* To have been instrumental by her holy, self-deny- 
 ing labours in a foreign field, long after she had passed to that 
 
 * Among those jewels is the following : 
 
 " A short time since, tlieie arrived one evening in a small village in 
 the western part of Indiana, a man in middle life, clad in the garb of a 
 sailor. His atidetie form, dark eye. and death-like paleness, together 
 with the peculiar bearing which a sailor alone possesses, drew around 
 him at once a peculiar interest. He had spent his youth and early man- 
 hood on the ocean, amid the toils and perils of a sailor's life. He had 
 enjoj-ed, in one of the New England States, the blessings of an early 
 education, and the instruction of a pious mother. But that mother had 
 long belbre gone down to her grave, sorrowing over the waywardness 
 and absence other wandering sou; while he, far away from the home of 
 his childhood, and the inttuence of a mothers prayers, had become a 
 reckless and ungodlj'- sailor. He mingled among the vicious and profane. 
 He forgot his mother's warnings, and became a swearer and an intidel. 
 Broken down at length, by the excessive toils of seafaring life, and the 
 intiueiice of the burning climes he had traversed, and under the influence 
 of an incurable disease, he was sinking rapidl\' to the grave. He had 
 now turned his face to his own native shore, and on the evening I have 
 mentioned above, had arrived at the hou^^e of an only sister to die. 
 
 " The neighbours and friends all flocked around liim to see and hear 
 a son of the ocean. But he was melancliol}'- and silent. He foresaw the 
 fate that awaited him. He knew tiiat he was doomed soon to die, and 
 to enter upon tliat dark uncertain future, which he had for many years 
 tried to believe to l.e only a phantom of tlie imagination. But now he 
 had no un,t,''(j(l]y eouipauions about him to laugh away his fears. His 
 thoughts ran ba';k to his early life. He rememljered the warnings and 
 counsels of his niotlier. now no more. He called to mind the tracts that 
 had been given him, and how ho had slighted the faithful admonitions 
 he had reciivetl. 
 
 " Christian friends now gathered around his dving bedside, and en- 
 
DEATHLESS INFLUENCE. 163 
 
 crown, in awakening in behalf of the work to which she con- 
 secrated her youth, and in which she sacrificed her hfe, a deep, 
 earnest, practical sympatliy in the heart of such a Christian and 
 such a minister, and, through him, of influencing hundreds more 
 with a zeal for Christ, which still lives and acts, is an honour 
 before which earth's proudest, brightest laurels pale. Such is 
 the deathless influence and the reward of a life devoted to God ! 
 
 deavoured to point him to the Redeemer of lost mankind. He lingered 
 on for weeks, sometimes in the agony of despair, sometimes buried in 
 the most melancholy stupor: at length, through the pardoning mercy of 
 Christ, he found peace in believing. Tlien, oh, what a change came over 
 his whole appearance. A smile of heavenly joy now lighted up his pallid 
 features. His tongue was now unloosed, and he was constantly convers- 
 ing with those around him of the preciousness of the Saviour he liad found. 
 
 " He spoke, too, with mingled feelings of sorrow and interest, of the 
 efforts that had been made for his salvation b}^ Christian passengers on 
 board his ship while he was a sailor. He took particular delight in 
 speaking of the lamented Harriet Wixslow, and of her voyage to India, 
 on board the • Indus,' in which vessel he was then an officer. ' I well 
 remember,' said he, his dying eye brightening with animation, — ' I well 
 remember that devoted missionary band, who then sailed to their tield 
 of labour in our vessel. ^Irs. Wixslow, in particular, I can never forget. 
 She was so kind and faithful, so persevering and constant in her endeav- 
 ours to arrest our attention, and le id us to reflect on our awful condition, 
 that I have always wondered why I did not then become a Christian, 
 with some others of the crew. But I stifled all my convictions, and put 
 off the all-important concerns of my soul. fSome of the tracts she gave 
 I read, others I threw away ; but I could never throw away or get rid 
 of her faithful admonitions. They have always followed me. l\\ the 
 ocean storm — amid the tierce bowlings of the tempest, when a yawning 
 eternity was at my feet, her sweet, kind voice of admonition was sound- 
 ing on my ear, wherever I went, among my profane associates on ship- 
 board, or in the haunts of vice on the shore. When I consider how she 
 liad left for ever the home of her childhood, and her dear brother and 
 friends behind, forsaking all the pleasant associations of her early life, to 
 go and spend her days among an ignorant and barbarous people, 1 could 
 not withstand such arguments against my scepticism. There must cer- 
 tainly be a reality in the religion of Christ. And. then, the delightful me- 
 moir of her. prepared by her husband, I have read it many times. Oh, it is 
 all true! She ivas a Christian, and now I hope to meet her in heaven.' 
 
 " During the few last days of his life, he spoke frequently, with tears 
 of gratitude, of Mrs. Winslow, and enjoined on all his friends to obtain 
 and read the interesting memoir of her life. He died in the triumph of 
 faith in a glorious Redeemer, whom he had, through nearly his whole 
 life, slighted and despised. 
 
 " Dear reader, here you have an example of the wide-spread influence 
 of Christian effort. That same good seed which was sown twenty-eight 
 years ago on board a ship on the ocean, we find springing up in the 
 centre of the great West." 
 
CHAPTER VIII. 
 
 *It is a certain fact,' remarks Foster, 'that whenever a 
 man prays aright, he forgets the philosophy of it, and feels as 
 if his supplications really loould make a difference in the deter- 
 minations and conduct of the Deity. In this spirit are the 
 prayers recorded in the Bible.' Mrs. Winslow, whose life 
 was baptized in devotion, whose soul was clad with prayer as 
 with a garment, presents a striking illustration of this beautiful 
 thought. While ever deeply conscious of the solemnity of 
 prayer, recognizing it to be, what it truly is, the most exalted 
 exercise of the soul, the most elevated state of thought and 
 feeling of which the mind is susceptible, — yet none engaged 
 in the exercise with more simple views or with a more child- 
 like spirit than she. Convinced that God answered prayer in 
 a way consonant with the Divine purpose, and worthy of 
 His own character, she yet so wrestled, and argued, and rea- 
 soned with Him, as if, in the words of the profound thinker we 
 have just quoted, her 'supplications really could make a differ- 
 ence in the determination and conduct of the Deity.' And so 
 must we approach the mercy-seat, not as philosophers, but as 
 Christians, — not as slaves, but as children, feeling that if prayer 
 cannot move God to us, prayer yet can move the lowly sup- 
 plicant towards God. The 'Thoughts' we are about to glean 
 from her private record and her letters, will give us a deeper 
 insight into the interior of her inner life, and exhibit her views 
 on some important doctrinal and experimental points of divine 
 truth. 
 
 ON COMMUNION WITH GOD. 
 
 " How little is this understood ! A cold, formal, heartless 
 prayer often; and if not in God's own children altogether 
 heartless, yet how little real communion, — oh, how little! No 
 interchange of love, no confession of sin, no adoring gratitude, 
 no emptying of the burdened heart into the loving heart of 
 God. This is communion, and such as even the angels them- 
 selves behold with dehght, while they can but imperfectly un- 
 [164] 
 
COMMUNION WITH GOD. 165 
 
 derstand tlie happiness known only to the saints of God. How 
 w^as I privileged this morning, confessing my own and my 
 children's sins, and giving myself and them up into the Lord's 
 hand, to do with us as seemeth Him good." 
 
 " Taplow, July 9th. — The Lord has been very gracious in 
 suffering me to draw near to Him, and granting me much of 
 his sensible presence. Dr. Love, in his ' Letters,' describes 
 my experience better than I can myself. If ever my heart 
 truly rejoices, it is in the view of what God is, as seen in 
 Christ, irrespective of my personal interest, and yet not losing 
 sight of my union to Christ. Dr. Love, whose attainments 
 were giant-like, compared with my poor speck of knowledge, 
 expresses this more fully ; but his experience is mine. On the 
 same ladder the Lord has placed my foot, though he is higher 
 up by many rounds than I. "When the character of God is 
 unfolded in Christ, — His infinite greatness, overpowering good- 
 ness, and glorious perfections, — my soul is filled with inex- 
 pressible joy ; I feel swallowed up in their vastness, and weep, 
 without being able to say why I w^eep. Oh, if a glimpse now 
 and then is so overpowering, what must the full vision of that 
 glory be ? The body here could not contain it. God be 
 praised for the little view, and for the full revelation that 
 awaits us in that better, brighter world above." 
 
 " 12th. — Dr. Love remarks, 'How sweet is the bitterness of 
 that repentance which is truly divine and gracious ! The same 
 light which opens the springs of godly sorrow, also uncovers 
 the fountain of divine joy.' These words express my own ex- 
 perience, and which I had thought w^as peculiar to myself; 
 and have therefore seldom advanced it to others, lest I should 
 mislead or perplex those to whom I wish to do good. Still I 
 think dear Dr. Love did not deal sufficiently with the manhood 
 of Christ. He seemed to look too little to God in Jesus. What 
 comfort or sympathy can a poor sinner desire from looking to 
 an infinitely holy God out of Christ ? When God spoke to 
 men, He came down clothed with a cloud ; and when this 
 same God speaks to us, it is in Jesus, robed in the cloud of our 
 sinless humanity. Thus revealing Himself, we look and live. 
 It is then we behold Him in all the milder rays of divine light 
 and glory, and adore, love, and bless Him who says. Fear not, 
 it is /." 
 
166 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 TO HER SON H- 
 
 " I received your long and interesting letter, and thank you 
 for it. . . . When you enlisted under the banner of King 
 Jesus, you commenced the life of a soldier, and are therefore 
 called, as a good soldier of Jesus Christy to fight manfully. 
 Your enemies are the word, Satan, and the flesh ; this last is 
 the greatest of all ; it lies down and rises up with you, and 
 wherever you are, this enemy is always at hand. But you are 
 exhorted to put on the whole armour of God, and to stand ; 
 and by faith in Christ you shall conquer. Keep your eye 
 steadily upon Jesus. Be not surprised at the conflict you 
 wage ; it is an evidence that you are Christ's true disciple. If 
 you were not a possessor of spiritual life, you would have noth- 
 ing to oppose you from within. Those who are dead in sin 
 know nothing of this warfare. A corpse floats down with the 
 stream ; but where there is living faith in the soul, it stems 
 the tide, buffets with the waves, and makes its way through 
 all that opposes it. Be of good courage, keep close to Jesus, 
 and you have nothing to fear from within or without. God, 
 who is our Sun and shield^ ivill give grace and glory; and no 
 good thing ivill He luitliliold from them that walk uprightly. Be 
 diligent in the use of all the means of grace, and may the Lord 
 abundantly bless your soul, and provide for all your wants." 
 
 To the same. — " I did not mean to write to you this time, 
 but you are so good yourself in writing to me, that I could not 
 bear to pass you by. . . . It is a mercy to be kept with 
 our eyes, and our hearts too, up to the dear Saviour, that we 
 may be ready when He gives the summons. This world is 
 nothing more than a wretched, dying vanity. But the bright 
 world to which we are travelling has substantial blessing and 
 happiness unutterable to bestow. Oh, then, what folly to 
 grieve here, and suffer our affections to wander from God ! 
 
 I am glad you attend Mr. S 's. The prayer-meetings will 
 
 revive your fainting soul. I do not recollect what first led me 
 there, but it was the Lord who directed my steps. The steins 
 of a good man are ordered hy the Lord. May He meet with 
 your soul and bless you. Many a time have I poured out my 
 heart for you in that sanctuary, and my fervent prayers were 
 offered up for your salvation. Those were blessed times. I 
 often think of them now. May Jesus keep our soul going out 
 after Him. I had rather seek Him sorrowing from morning 
 to night, than not to seek Him at all, or feel cold and barren 
 in my soul. Kiss the little ones for grandmamma." 
 
LETTER TO HER SON, R. F. W. 167 
 
 TO HER SON, R. F. W 
 
 " . . . I earnestly hope nothing will induce you to re- 
 linquish your habits of temperance. How earnestly and con- 
 stantly I pray that God may keep you from everything that, 
 by slow and insidious steps, might lead to certain and, perhaps, 
 irremediable ruin. Anything in the form of drink, but simple 
 water, — I mean, of course, of an intoxicating nature, — is dan- 
 gerous. I have, in the course of my life witnessed such sad, 
 such awful effects resulting from moderate drinking, that my 
 heart sickens at the very remembrance of it. Place nothing 
 to your lips stronger than water. No one but God can know 
 how anxious I am that all my professing children may be kept 
 walking in the fear of God, and in the love of the Spirit. Re- 
 member Him who loved you unto death ; live to Him and for 
 Him, and resolve rather to die than do aught dishonouring to 
 His dear name, who, in so remarkable a manner, called you out 
 of darkness into His marvellous light. Dear child, bear with 
 a fond and anxious mother ; for you know not how my heart 
 goes out after you. The Lord has wonderfully kept me these 
 twenty-eight years in His blessed way, and has never per- 
 mitted me to bring dishonour upon His dear cause. And 
 yet I feel that I as much require His upholding hand, and His 
 restraining grace, at this moment, as I did at the first. Let 
 him that thinketh he standeth take heed lest he fall. Jesus is 
 very precious to my soul. I feel I cannot live without Him. 
 He is my all-in all. The world, and all its glory and riches, 
 is as dross to mc in comparison of Him whom my soul loveth. 
 And yet I find the Christian life to be one of constant war- 
 fare, and feel, at times, as though a host were encamped against 
 me. 
 
 "Again, let me exhort you to keep close to Christ. Make 
 Him your Counsellor and your Confidant; Him to whom you 
 may entrust all your concerns, and into whose ear you may 
 breathe all your wants. Keep an open heart with Christ; you 
 need no other friend. Do all you can for His cause, and He 
 will take care of you. Walk in uprightness before Him, in 
 heart, lip, and life. Should you discover failures, go at once 
 and confess them, and get your pardon sealed to you afresh by 
 the Holy Ghost. Never keep a sense of guilt upon the con- 
 science when it can be removed at once by the blood of Christ. 
 There is not a more holy exercise in the Christian's life than 
 
168 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 the confession of sin to God, I mean by this, that confessing 
 sin to God has a sanctifying influence on the heart, maintains 
 purity, and keeps the conscience tender. You need not wait 
 until you can retire and fall upon your knees; you can do it 
 in a moment. The heart lifted up in silent prayer is sufficient. 
 /, the Lord, search the heart. I have no greater joy than to 
 see my children walking in the truth. Put on Christ, walk in 
 Christ, and may God bless you and make you a blessing." 
 
 The subject of prophetic truth, doubtless the more solemnly 
 urged upon her attention by the remarkable aspect of the 
 times, of which she was a close and spiritual observer, began 
 at this period to interest and occupy her thoughts. The doc- 
 trine of the Lord's second coming, — the signs which appeared 
 to herald, and the events which probably would be ushered in 
 by his glorious advent, — seemed to be the great truth which 
 particularly arrested her attention. AVe gather her sentiments 
 and feelings on these interesting topics of inquiry, from her 
 diary and correspondence : — 
 
 ^' Awoke this morning at about six o'clock, and read 'Hugh 
 White on the Second Advent/ and was led to lift up my heart 
 to the Lord to direct my mind into this important truth, and 
 enlighten what was dark in me on the subject. In the course 
 of the day, felt much tried at my want of spirituality, my 
 coldness and worldliness. I besought the Lord to revive in 
 my soul every drooping grace of the Spirit, to save me from 
 sad declension, quicken me afresh by the power of the Holy 
 Ghost, and draw me nearer and yet nearer to himself." 
 
 "My dear Lord's day, Torrington-square. 
 
 "Have you ever read the Rev. Hugh White on the Second 
 Advent? If you have not, obtain it, and read it. I am 
 perusing it with deep interest, and, as far as I have gone, I 
 can enter fully into his views. I am longing to have my eyes 
 open to the subject more than they were. It appears to me a 
 delightful theme for close and prayerful investigation. Do 
 give it your attention. May the Lord unfold His own truth 
 to your soul and mine! Mr. Evans's mind is also opening to 
 this truth. Could I but be sure that He would indeed soon 
 come, how my soul would rejoice; but of this I cannot so far 
 see any clear evidence. Oh, for more weanedness from the 
 world ! Oh, to love Jesus more, and to have Him more in our 
 thoughts ! How soon we may behold Him in all His glory, 
 
THOUGHTS OX THE COMING OF CHRIST. 169 
 
 coming in the clouds of heaven, with all His saints and holy- 
 angels ! May the Lord keep us watching and waiting, and 
 looking for the summons, and enable us to say, Come., Lord 
 Jesus^ come quickly ! I grieve that I have so long neglected 
 to search into this glorious subject; but I am only now just 
 beginning to investigate it, with much prayer, as I read that 
 the Lord would lead me into the truth, and keep me from 
 all error in judgment. But as it opens upon me, I feel my 
 soul led out in grateful praise and thanksgiving. Do get the 
 book I have mentioned, and read it with prayerful attention." 
 The following unfinished letter, addressed to her pastor, on 
 the subject of the Lord's Coming, and found among her papers, 
 it is believed was never sent : — 
 
 "My dear and beloved Brother, 
 
 " I send you the enclosed, and hope, if you can spare the 
 time, you will give it a perusal, and compare it with the 
 Word. Truly it behoves us, as much as it did Daniel, to 
 search diligently to know and understand the signs of the 
 times. God was far from being angry with Kis servant at 
 that time; and if the apostles wrote and spake so much of the 
 coming of the Lord in their days, as it is now nearer to us 
 than it was to them, it is assuredly of the greatest consequence 
 to examine for ourselves. Truly I can say, for one, Come., 
 Lord Jesus, come quickly! I trust you will make time to in- 
 vestigate this subject, and may the Lord enlighten all our minds. 
 That some great movement is going on in the kingdom of 
 Christ on earth, is as evident to my mind as that I live. "We 
 cannot close our eyes to what is passing all around us. The 
 wheels of God's wonderful providence are moving onward, 
 and I think that none who love Him but must be prayerfully 
 anxious to watch the way He is taking with His church. My 
 heart is at times overwhelmed with the thought of His near 
 approach. How delightful the prospect of being with Jesus, 
 our dearest and best friend on earth and in heaven ! To see 
 Hira whom we have loved, communed with, confided In, gone 
 to in every time of trouble, and found Him a present help ! 
 And then to meet with those dear to our hearts, who have got 
 there before us to welcome us home ! I long to see Jesus; He 
 is very, very precious to my soul, and I trust He is to yours." 
 
 To one of her sons in America, who held what she consid- 
 ered extreme views of the Lord's coming, she thus faithfully 
 writes : — 8 
 
170 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 " There is no doubt but that the coming of the 
 
 Lord draws nigh, but as to the exact time no man knows, nor 
 can know; therefore you have been wrong in fixing a time, 
 and running into extravagance, and causing the infidel to boast 
 and tauntingly to ask. Where is the promise of His coming ? 
 The believer is so to live, that whether he goes to Christ, or 
 Christ comes to him, he may be found with his lamp brightly 
 burning, ready to obey the summons. While you have fixed 
 in your mind that you shall certainly be on earth at the com- 
 ing of the Lord, should death arrest you, you might in one 
 sense be totally unprepared for the event, and probably disap- 
 pointment and anguish would fill your heart. Such has been 
 the case with some, who as fully expected the Lord as you do; 
 and yet the Lord sent for them, and they had to pass through 
 the dark valley of the shadow of death, that they might swell 
 His train when He really did come. Two members of our 
 church were sadly tried w^hen the Lord sent for them, and for 
 some time their minds were greatly distressed, and they met 
 the last enemy with reluctance. Now, see the danger of fix- 
 ing the time as to the designs of God towards us. I long for 
 the coming of Jesus, and would leave the world ; but as I 
 know not the day nor the hour, let me be ready to meet Him 
 in whatever way He might appoint. It is not for you to know 
 the times or the seasons ivhich the Father hath put in His own 
 power^ 
 
 It has been remarked — and the reader will have gathered 
 from these pages confirmation of its truth — that she was a close 
 and intelligent observer of the characteristics of the times in 
 which she lived. Events which to others might pass as trivial 
 and meaningless, would, to her deeply spiritual and observing 
 eye, be replete with interest and pregnant with significance. 
 She read the journals of the day, and studied the movements 
 of the age, with but one object, — the development of God's 
 purpose in the progress of His truth and kingdom in the world. 
 It is thus she records her sentiments on this subject : — 
 
 " The- Lord God will sift His church, and throroughly purge 
 His floor. He has commanded His ministering servants to 
 separate the precious from the vile. This duty they have 
 most awfully neglected, but now He is about to do it Himself; 
 and what He does will be loell done. Satan is endeavouring 
 to overturn, but God holds him in His hand, and Avill overrule 
 all his wicked designs, for the welfare of His church, the hor,- 
 
SIGNS OF THE TIMES. 171 
 
 our of His truth, and the glory of His name. So shall the 
 precious be separated from the vile, and the world be driven 
 out of His church. The work began in Scotland, has com- 
 menced in England, and will go on until the whole is accom- 
 plished. Then comes the Bridegroom, in the clouds of heav- 
 en, to meet His bride, purified by fire from all her dross. 
 The time is drawing nigh. Everything indicates it. How 
 strange that any who profess to be the disciples of Christ, 
 should be indijfferent to what is passing before their eyes at 
 this momentous period ! Surely the wise virgins are slumber- 
 ing. Oh, that the church would awake and rejoice at the 
 glorious prospect that is before her ! The Lord Jesus is on 
 His way. Puseyism is the forerunner of His second coming. 
 It is preparing the way of the Lord. How truly can God 
 overrule all things to accomplish his own purposes, — even 
 Satan's device, to work His will, and do His chosen people 
 good." 
 
 "clouds breaking." 
 
 "The Lord is about to do a great Avork in the nominally 
 professing church of Christ. He is preparing the way for His 
 second advent. Error, in the shape of semi-popery, is spread- 
 ing like wildfire, and this will finally consume the chaff, and 
 leave the pure wheat yet more pure. Satan thinks differently ; 
 but God designs much good to His church, by permitting the 
 abounding of this error. The church of Christ has nothing to 
 do (in its union) with this world ; but Satan has contrived to 
 mix up the world with the church, and now a holy and jeal- 
 ous God has put His own hand to the work, and a complete 
 and final separation will take place. I have long seen His 
 blessed hand like a bright light rising in the darkness that has 
 obscured the glory of His church. To me, it grew more dis- 
 tinct as the darkness grew more palpable ; and while many, 
 trembling for the ark of God, were quaking for fear, I have 
 been enabled to keep my eye upon the little bright cloud 
 which grew brighter to my view. And oh, how my soul 
 has rejoiced ! for I could discern the faithfulness and love 
 of my God, in that He was not unmindful of his promise, 
 and that His eye was upon, and His heart still toward, His 
 church." 
 
 It was probably in its prophetic light that she was led to 
 study the Lord's parable of "the pearl of great price," and to 
 
172 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 offer an interpretation differing entirely from the one generally 
 received. 
 
 "I can truly say," she writes in her diary, "0 Lord, come 
 quickly, and take Thy one church — Thy bride — to the home 
 prepared for her. This is the ' pearl of great price,' the church 
 — not Christ — hidden in the field. Jesus comes down, parts 
 with the last drop of His precious blood to purchase this 
 'pearl,' and also the field — the world — for the sake of the 
 pearl which is the church. The world is now kept in exist- 
 ence for the sake of the church alone ; and when the church 
 is complete and brought home, the world, being of no further 
 use, will be burnt up and destroyed. Now the matter in dis- 
 pute stands thus ; either the church purchases Christ, or Christ 
 purchases the church. As the church had nothing wherewith 
 to purchase Christ, then Christ must have purchased the 
 church ; and such was the magnitude of the price, that none 
 save God's own Son could have bought it. In this sense 
 Christ died for the whole world. He purchased the world for 
 the sake of the treasure that was hid in the world. To sum 
 it up in a few words, — 'the pearl of great price,' and the 
 'treasure hidden in the field,' are identical — the elect church 
 of God. Christ parts with all that He had, even life itself, to 
 complete the purchase ; and on the day of His public espousals 
 with His church He will wear the pearl in His crown of re- 
 joicing ; and the world in which it was hid, and from whence 
 it was taken, will then be consumed." 
 
 As sustaining this interpretation of the parable, she was 
 wont to quote Toplady's beautiful and familiar fines : 
 
 " Deathless Principle, arise ! 
 Soar, thoii native of the skies ! 
 Pearl of price, by Jesus bought, 
 To his glorious likeness wrought ; 
 Go, to shine before his throne, 
 Deck his meditatorial crown : 
 Go, liis triumph to adorn ; 
 Made for God, to God return." 
 
 The study of God's general providence necessarily implies 
 attention to His particular providences. The eye that is broad 
 awake to scan with prayerful interest each new sign in the 
 political and ecclesiastical firmament, eager to trace some indi- 
 cation of God's unfolding purposes towards his church, was 
 not likely to overlook His more especial dealings in individual 
 
GRATEFUL RECOLLECTIONS. 173 
 
 history. We find her, therefore, thus recording what she en- 
 titles 
 
 " god's dealings in his leadings." 
 "The text last evening is from the 146th Psalm, 8th verse: 
 The Lord raiseih them that are bowed down. It was excellent 
 truth, and most comforting to the tried believer. How little 
 do we think of whose care we are under, and whose loving 
 eye is ever guiding our way through the wilderness, causing all 
 things we meet to work together for our good ! Thus has He 
 led me. He has brought me into the wilderness to teach me, 
 to lead me to cling closer to Himself; to brighten every grace 
 of the Spirit ; to wean from a dying world, and to show me 
 this was not my rest, because it Avas polluted. Here He gave 
 me precious faith, and then tried the faith He gave. 
 When bowed down, He lifted me up. He shut me out of the 
 vain things of a poor empty world, and shut me in to Himself, 
 He gave me my work to do, and fitted me for it. Every mo- 
 ment was occupied in doing His will. Whatever I needed I 
 went to Him for, and never was denied one good thing. He 
 proved himself the Husband to the widow, the Father to the 
 fatherless, the home of the stranger. His name to me has 
 been a strong tower, into w^iich I could flee and be safe. His 
 Spirit came upon me with all His hfe-giving, converting, and 
 reconverting power; filling my dwelling with the richest 
 blessings of heaven. Oh, what returns can I make for all His 
 abounding goodness to me ? Shall I not sing the loudest in 
 heaven ?" 
 
 " grateful recollections." 
 " Reading a New York religious journal, I observed an ac- 
 count of the erection of a new place of w^orship in Oliver 
 street, the former one having been destroyed by fire. This 
 little circumstance recalled to my mind many trying yet hal- 
 lowed scenes that have passed away for ever, yet cannot be 
 forgotten. It was in that sanctuary I sometimes worshipped, 
 the pulpit being then occupied by the late Rev. John Wil- 
 liams. When my soul has been oppressed and desolate, find- 
 ing comfort nowhere else, I have repaired thither, and have 
 found it. Dear Mr. Williams was an eminent man of God, 
 and a deeply experienced preacher of the gospel. The precious 
 truths, as they fell with so much weight from his lips, were 
 
174 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 often clothed witli a remarkable degree of the unction of the 
 Spirit. And altliough I have gone tliere often with my heart 
 overwhelmed within me, I have yet been enabled, by his min- 
 istrations, to look afresh to the Rock that was higher than I. 
 Oh, that I could then have seen how blessedly and \visely the 
 Lord was training me and mine for better things to come ; 
 causing me to pass under the rod, that He might bring me into 
 the bond of the covenant !" 
 
 "the true source of spiritual joy." 
 "I believe that our joy and rejoicing in Christ Jesus de- 
 pends upon our faith, that is, our believing more firmly the 
 matter-of-fact truths revealed to us in the Bible. Do I helieve 
 that Jesus Christ lived, and died, and rose again from the 
 grave, and is now alive in heaven, and is there for us ? In 
 proportion as we are thoroughly persuaded of this, we can and 
 must rejoice. It is written. In ivhom ye also trusted ; after that 
 ye believed, ye loere sealed with the Holy Sjnrit ofpro7mse, which 
 is the earnest of our inheritance. Eph. i. 13. Therefore it 
 follows, that in proportion to our firm belief of these divine 
 verities, these glorious realities, we shall not only rejoice, but 
 be transformed into the Divine image. Another mistake com- 
 mon to many Christians, is the habit of looking for ever 
 within for some evidence of their adoption ; and finding noth- 
 ing there satisfactory, they do not and cannot rejoice. Now, 
 this is a serious defect. It is not by looking within ourselves, 
 but, on the contrary, it is by looking quite out of ourselves, 
 and directing the eye alone to Christ, — to what Christ is, and 
 where Christ is, — that can alone give us real consolation ; and 
 in proportion to our faith in Him, we not only rejoice, but our 
 evidences brighten, and the Spirit within, whose office it is to 
 glorify Christ, bears witness w4th our spirit that we are born 
 of God. The life of God in the soul of man is one of the 
 most glorious works of God. It is a greater work than that 
 of creation. He says. Let there he light, and in a moment 
 there is in the soul the light of life. The sinner looks to Jesus, 
 believes, and is saved. He lives now for God and for a glori- 
 ous eternity. Tlie Holy Ghost, having full possession of the 
 soul, carries on the great work of sanctification. He has 
 written on the heart, Holiness unto the Lord ; and the constant 
 prayer of the renewed soul, as a result, wiU be, Lead me in 
 the way of up7'ightness.^' 
 
GODLY SINCERITY. 175 
 
 " THE CHRISTIAN JOURNEY. 
 
 "Life is a journey, often a short one, and always uncertain. 
 But there is another journey. The behever is travelling 
 through a waste howling wilderness, to another and a glori- 
 ous region, where ineffable delight and happiness await us. 
 The road is narrow, the entrance' strait, so strait that 
 thousands miss it and perish in the wilderness ; but true be- 
 lievers, under the teaching and convoy of the Holy Ghost, 
 find it and walk in it. The King, in His infinite love and 
 compassion, has made a hedge about them, separating and de- 
 fending them from the many beasts of prey that lurk around 
 them ; and although they hear their bowlings and behold their 
 threatnings, they are safe from their power. But their stron- 
 gest foe is within themselves, — a heart deceitful above all things 
 and desperately wicked. From this there is no escape but by 
 constant watchfulness, and earnest cries to their best Friend 
 and Guide for protection. And were it not for this faithful 
 Guide, how often, discouraged by reason of the way, would 
 they turn back ! But He watches over them by night and by 
 day, strengthens them when weak, upholds them when falling, 
 encourages them when cast downi, defends them when at- 
 tacked, provides for them when in need, leads them by living 
 streams, and causes them there to lie down in pleasant pastures, 
 and on sunny banks. And as they advance they obtain brighter 
 views of the good land they are nearing, and they long to see 
 the King in His beauty, and the land that is yet very far off, 
 and to meet those that have already arrived on that happy 
 shore." 
 
 " GODLY SINCERITY." 
 
 " Never pay a compliment at the expense of conscience or 
 of truth. Fear God. Never say what you do not really feel. 
 Confess those sins of heart which no eye sees but God's. As- 
 sume nothing that does not belong to you, and comes not from 
 your heart. Beware of adopting another person's experience 
 as your own. Let the fear of God dwell richly in you. Let 
 your heart be right with Him. Do all with your eye upon 
 eternity. Think little of time, except to improve every mo- 
 ment. Have an abiding sense of the Lord's presence with 
 5'ou, and do not be satisfied without it. Never suffer your 
 politeness to carry you beyond truth. Fear God. Let truth 
 dwell in your heart, and nothing but truth flow from your lips. 
 
176 MEMOIR OF MES. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 Pray, and look for tlie answer. Aim always to liave the con- 
 sciousness of God's ear harkening. Be not satisfied with an 
 empty, lifeless form, nor leave the throne of grace without a 
 recognition. Honour the Spirit, and the Spirit will honour 
 you. Plead for His indwelling power. Grieve Him not, lest 
 your heart grow cold, and your soul become barren. Strive 
 to live on high, and you will live holily ; and to live holily is 
 to liv^e happily." 
 
 " UNHOLY JEALOUSY." 
 
 'A suspicious, jealous spirit is one of the most corroding 
 evils and uncomfortable states of mind an unhappy individual 
 can be tormented with. It makes its subject, and all others, 
 miserable. It impairs confidence, weakens friendship, sepa- 
 rates the best friends, and produces incalculable mischief far 
 and wide. It was jealousy that hurled the sinning angels from 
 heaven. It w^as jealousy that caused the fall of our first par- 
 ents, and drove them from paradise. It was jealousy that 
 led to the first murder. It was jealousy that produced 
 hatred and revenge in Esau towards Jacob. It is marked 
 in God's word as a hateful, God-dishonouring, soul-de- 
 stroying sin. Let us beware of it, watch and pray against 
 it, and the moment we detect its workings within us, crush it 
 at once. It is the offspring of Satan, and the destroyer of 
 mankind. Let us also beware of engendering and encourag- 
 ing dislike to any one with wdiom we associate. This evil un- 
 checked, tends to corrode the whole inner man, sours the 
 temper, and causes us to be an annoyance to every one 
 around us. The instant we discover the hateful feeling, let 
 us go at once to Jesus, lay the heart open before Him, unveil 
 the festering wound to His loving eye, and He will heal, and 
 give us the victory over ourselves." 
 
 "the unity of the spirit." 
 "The Spirit recognises His own image wherever He meets 
 with it. If I have the Holy Spirit dwelling in me, (and if I 
 have not the Spirit of Christ, I am none of His,) the same 
 Spirit dwelling in another will acknowledge it. The Spirit 
 is a Spirit of love as well as of holiness. And this He has 
 made the test of our sonship. We know we have j^nssed from 
 death unto life, because ive love the hrdhren. Not brethren 
 only of the church at Ephesus, or of the church at Rome, 
 but brethren in Christ bavins: his own blessed imaeo en- 
 
GROWTH IN GRACE. 177 
 
 graren on the renevred soul. "Whenever we feel not this 
 spirit of union, we might well doubt our spiritual life and our 
 allegiance to the Son of God. If I meet a beggar in the street, 
 or a poor woman at an applestall, or one of the great of the 
 earth, and discern in that individual the Spirit of Christ, I ask 
 not of what church he is, or to what communion he belongs ; 
 my heart goes out in love to him, and this is the one and self- 
 same Spirit recognising His own image in another. How is 
 it with you? Do you love Christ's image wherever and in 
 whomsoever you meet it ? Do you speak unkindly or think 
 uncharitably of any of God's redeemed ones, because they are 
 not of your sect ? Then you may well doubt your sincerity. 
 The love of the Spirit — the love which he inspires in the heart 
 — is an unselfish love, a holy love, a uniting, cementing love, 
 a bond of union to the one family of God, and to Christ the 
 one Head. Again I repeat the unfailing test. By this shall 
 all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to 
 ano^erP 
 
 "growth in grace." 
 "There is such a state as growing in grace. Not that I 
 believe, in one sense, I am a whit better now than I ever was ; 
 for in my flesh there dwelleth no good thing. The flesh is the 
 same that it ever was, and will continue the same until laid in 
 the grave. But is there not such a thing as knowing more of 
 God, and more of the absolute certainty of the truth of the 
 gospel? Is there not such a thing as knowing more of Christ, 
 His excellence, preciousness, and fulness, through the teaching 
 of the Holy Spirit? And will not this advancing knowledge 
 confirm and establish our souls, strengthen our confidence, pro- 
 mote our happiness, and lead to holiness of heart, and of life ? 
 This growth in divine knowledge, this knowing more of God 
 in Christ, is calculated to invigorate the new man, and thus to 
 keep in subjection the evil which we feel is ever striving for 
 the mastery. This is growing in grace, and this is grace 
 growing in us. Then let us not grieve the Holy Spirit, this 
 Divine Indweller of our hearts. Also to know more of our 
 wretched, lost condition, our helplessness and unworthiness, is 
 growing in grace ; for this view of our state will cause us to 
 value that precious blood that can alone atone for our sins, 
 and to cleave more closely to Christ, endearing Him to the 
 heart, and glorifving Him in the life." 
 8* 
 
178 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 The writings of the Rev. C. G. Finney, an American Pres- 
 byterian clergyman of much and deserved celebrity, are ex- 
 tensively and favourably known in this country. Some of his 
 theological views were not considered as strictly sound ; favour- 
 ing, as it was supposed, the notion of a certain degree of moral 
 ability in the sinner. It would appear from the following 
 quotation, found in Mrs. Winslow's journal, that his views on 
 this point have become essentially modified ; thus ranking him 
 more decidedly amongst the orthodox, as he previously was 
 amongst the most zealous and useful divines of his age. It is 
 with peculiar satisfaction we transcribe the extract for the 
 present work: — 
 
 "In a recent publication by the Rev. Mr. Finney, I met 
 with the following statement from his pen: — 'I have thought 
 that (at least in a great many instances) sufficient stress has 
 not been laid on the necessity of Divine influence on the hearts 
 of Christians and sinners. I am confident that I have some- 
 times erred in this respect myself In order to rouse sinners 
 and backsliders from their self-justifying pleas and refuges, I 
 have laid (and I doubt not others have also laid) too much 
 stress upon the natural ahility of sinners, to the neglect of 
 showing the nature and extent of their dependence upon the 
 grace of God and the influence of His Spirit. This has grieved 
 the Spirit of God. His work not being honoured by being 
 made sufficiently prominent, and not being able to get the 
 glory to Himself of his own work. He has withdrawn or 
 withheld His influence.' How much it is to be regretted that 
 Mr. Finney did not make this discovery earlier. Much mis- 
 chief might have been avoided, and much more substantial 
 good accomplished." 
 
 ON THE CONDUCT OF A MINISTER'S WIFE. 
 
 ". . . . Every time I bow my knees before God, I pray for 
 you that you may be spared to your dear husband, and be in- 
 creasingly fitted for the all-important work He has given you 
 to do. Oh, how important the care of precious souls — souls 
 that are destined for an endless eternity I A minister's wife is, 
 of all others, placed in the most responsible situation in the 
 church of God. Much of his usefulness depends upon her. 
 She must be a helpmate to the Lord's servant, and a servant 
 of the Lord herself. His mind is to be kept free from the 
 little cares and annoyances that would interrupt and distract 
 
PARENTAL INDULGENCE. 179 
 
 him in his studies ; and, above all, his ears closed to the trifling 
 gossip of those who talk much, but do little for the cause of a 
 precious Saviour. I am persuaded that Satan is ever on the 
 watch to make a handle of evcrj^thing to impair the usefulness 
 of God's ministers. Be humble, prayerful, and watchful, always 
 feeling yourself as much called to aid the work in your way 
 as he is in his. And may God bless you both, beloved chil- 
 dren." 
 
 ON PARENTAL INDULGENCE. 
 
 " How necessary it is to bring up children in the nurture 
 and fear of the Lord ! Without this, even in a worldly point 
 of view, they and others are often miserable. No children 
 are so happy as those who have been early taught implicit and 
 immediate obedience to a parent's wishes, or will, or commands. 
 "^V^ould that parents more universally felt that, when they 
 suft'er their children to disobey them, they are absolutely teach- 
 ing them to sin against God by breaking one of His command- 
 ments, and one to which the promise of long life is given. 
 No wonder if God, in just displeasure, remove the child from 
 such tuition. Remember what a solemn and instructive lesson 
 the Holy Ghost has given in the history of Eli. There is 
 much danger, from an amiable wish to gratify a child, of 
 counter-ordering our own orders. If you once direct a child 
 to do a thing, however unpleasant it may be to yourself or 
 the child, insist in firmness upon immediate and full obedience. 
 There should be no demur, nor delay. Prompt obedience is 
 as lovely in a child, as its enforcement is dignified in a parent. 
 The firm and gentle constraint of parental authority commands 
 respect, and even inspires reverence and love in the child 
 towards the parent. Thus, then, if you desire your children 
 sliould grow up, cherishing for you profound esteem and affec- 
 tion, insist upon this filial duty — the duty of implicit obedience 
 — and commence early. To begin right is the way to end 
 right." 
 
 The death of an amiable and much-loved daughter-in-law, the 
 
 wife of her son E , whom she had fondled as an infant, 
 
 and who, in later life, clave to her w^th an affection the most 
 tender and inseparable, w^as a sore bereavement. She was 
 never so conscious of her own weakness as when under trial ; 
 and yet, to those who knew her best, she never, in reality, 
 more fully exhibited the strong marks of a Christ-clinging, 
 
180 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 God-honouring faith as then. This problem will be of easy 
 solution to the Christian, It was at the moment of felt weak- 
 ness, that Christ's own strength was jDerfectecl in her, and His 
 grace found suificient for her need. A letter to a daughter-in- 
 law in America describes her state of mind under this calamity. 
 
 " My dear J , Leamiugton, March 19tli, 1844. 
 
 "You will be grieved to hear that the Lord has seen 
 fit to lay His heavy hand upon us, and to take to Himself, 
 
 most unexpectedly, our dear, precious S . She has gone, 
 
 leaving us all to mourn her loss, which, I doubt not, is her 
 eternal gain. The stroke has been most afflictive to every 
 member of the family, but to none more so than myself. She 
 was tenderly and deservedly beloved by all, and we shall miss 
 her in a way that few can be missed. To me no daughter 
 could have been more devoted, or more tenderly and sincerely 
 affectionate. During intervals of her illness, her mind was 
 taken up with eternal things, and her thoughts of Jesus were 
 sweet. The Lord had been for some time preparing her for 
 this event — it was a preparation for heaven, for glory, and for 
 the full enjoyment of Himself. During the most irying period 
 of anxiety I ever passed through, the Lord mercifully sup- 
 ported me. Prayer was offered for her by the whole church 
 in John-street, I may say morning, noon, and night ; and also 
 by all who had the happiness of knowing her, who could pray. 
 But the Lord had need of her, and He took her from the evil 
 to come. She was an obedient wife, a devoted mother, a lov- 
 ing sister, and a most affectionate daughter to me. I never 
 knew what it was to have a care, when with her. She always 
 thought of me, and everything she imagined would contribute 
 to my comfort, she did. Always cheerful, and never out of 
 temper, her home was made happy for all. I never knew a 
 more unselfish person in my life ; her whole aim and study 
 was to make all happy around her. She ever considered her 
 husband's interests above everything else, and to please him 
 was the first thought of her heart. He never left her, but 
 hung over her until the last, with the most tender, heart-rend- 
 ing solicitude. Dear, precious saint ; she has escaped from a 
 world of trial, sin, and sorrow, and is now with Him she loved. 
 
 The stroke has been almost too much for dear E 's state of 
 
 health. But after all, there is one Friend from whom death 
 cannot separate us. In imagination I have followed her into 
 
LETTER TO A FRIEND. 181 
 
 the presence of Jesus, witnessed her adoring, sinless gratitude 
 and love ; her pure spirit recogniing those once known and 
 dear to her, around the throne of God. My thoughts have 
 been much in heaven, and I seem, sometimes, (so real has it 
 
 been,) to wish to be there. Dear J , Hve more and more 
 
 for eternity. That the Lord may keep you and me, and all 
 we love, in close readiness for the summons, come when it will, 
 is my prayer." 
 
 From her Diary. — "March 20th, 1844. — Dear S 's 
 
 death has brought eternal things very near to me. Heaven 
 seems always before me, and in imagination I am constantly 
 there. I long to be gone. I much enjo}*, in anticipation, the 
 blessedness of that place where Jesus is, wjiere He unveils 
 His beauteous face, and we shall behold Him without a cloud 
 between. My sweetest meditation, lying down and rising up, 
 
 or waking in the night, is heaven. Dear S 's pure spirit 
 
 walking in white, enjoying the unutterable bliss of perfect free- 
 dom from sin, in the presence of Jesus, her dearest, her best 
 friend, is before me. She once heard of Him with the hearing 
 of the ear, but now lier eyes behold Him. I can scarcely 
 realize that she has outstripped me in the race, and has reached 
 the goal before me. The first shall he last, and the last first. 
 How often have we conversed together of Him, as we walked 
 arm-in-arm to the house of God. Now she sees Him — is at 
 His side — adoring gratitude fills her soul, and boundless love 
 beams in every look. Dear relations, too, meeting to part no 
 more for ever. What do we not owe a good and gracious 
 God for the hope of immortality beyond tlie dark and dreary 
 
 grave! Precious S was mercifully preserved from all 
 
 those dismal forebodings, w^hich the thoughts of death and 
 the grave often create in the dying believer. Before she knew 
 her danger she was there, safely housed in the mansion pre- 
 pared for her. Thanks he unto God for His imsjxakahle gift ! 
 And now, my dear Lord, my soul waits and longs for the fruit 
 springing from this dispensation. Oh, let it not pass away 
 without a rich and mighty blessing. It may, but God can 
 speak, if not in affliction, yet in prosperity. The work is His. 
 When He begins, none can hinder. If He speaks but the 
 word, it shall be done." 
 
 TO A FEIEND. 
 
 " Dear Sister in Jesus, — ^pril 4th, 1844. 
 
 " Accept my thanks for your little volume ; it just came 
 
182 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 at a moment when most acceptable and most needed. My be- 
 loved daughter's death has brought lieaven very near to me. 
 It appears but a step and I am there. I have followed her 
 departed spirit into the presence of Him whom she loved ; have 
 beheld her wondering delight, adoring gratitude, and over- 
 whelming love, w^hile she gazed on Him whose precious blood 
 redeemed her soul from all sin and sorrow for ever. I have 
 imagined the recognition of her dear relatives who had gone 
 before her, and have fancied the holy joy of her pure spirit in 
 meeting them again. Oh, heaven is worth living for ! A life 
 of trial and of tribulation is as nothing when compared with 
 the mighty blessings that await the believer in Jesus, when he 
 drops the body of sin and of death. After recovering, in some 
 measure, from the shock of her sufferings and death, my mind 
 turned to the bright scene above, and there my soul has been 
 more or less regaled ever since. I have been, and still am, 
 looking to the things that are not seen, and that are eternal. 
 It seems to have raised me some feet above earth, and I pray 
 that I may not only be kept there, but rise higher and still 
 higher. Precious Bible! precious revelation of God's most 
 gracious doings of eternal mercy to such sinners as we are ! 
 Oh, to look beyond that dark and dismal grave, and remember 
 the word that says, Absent from the hody^ inesent luith the 
 Lord! My soul does rejoice at this moment in God my Sa- 
 viour. Oh, He is very, very precious — none like Him on earth 
 or in heaven. Much as I anticipate of happiness in meeting 
 dear, very dear relatives in heaven, it would be no heaven to 
 me if I did not see Jesus, my best, ni}^ dearest, my constant 
 friend, w^ho, wnth unceasing patience, tenderness, and mercy, 
 has followed me through all my wanderings in this wilderness 
 world, and has never, no, never left nor forsaken me for one 
 single moment. To know Him aright, is a little heaven begun 
 below. The nearer we get to Jesus here, the more we taste 
 of the blessedness that awaits us above. Never, dear friend, 
 be satisfied with what you know of Him now. Press on to 
 know more and more. And w^hat a humiliating reflection it is, 
 that Vv-e require often trial upon trial to rouse us from our slum- 
 bers, not only to our duty, but to our sweetest, highest privi- 
 leges ! Dearest Jesus, help Thy pilgrims to live more like 
 pilgrims, above a poor dying world, and more in full view of 
 the glory that awaits them wdien they shall see Thee face to 
 face. Dear friend, forgive me ; but my heart is full of this one 
 
LETTER TO A FRIEND. 183 
 
 subject, and I can seldom write, speak, or think of anything 
 
 else. Precious S 's death has been in some measure new 
 
 Hfe to my soul. I thank God for it ; oh, it was a mercy to her 
 and a mercy to me. Jesus does all things well. I cease now 
 to think of her in the grave ; I see her with the eye of faith 
 alone. Let us aim in all things to follow Him who, despising 
 this world's show, left us an example how we should walk. 
 The world and its nothings are often a sad snare to God's 
 saints. Oh, that by faith we may overcome it all, and keep 
 close to Jesus. Ye are not of the tuorld, even as I am not of the 
 world. Let us try and not attend to its gewgaws, and keep 
 a more steadfast, unwavering eye upon Christ. He has gone 
 a little before us, and stands beckoning us to follow. One 
 word before I close. Live for eternity. Let go your hold 
 upon the world. I need this exhortation myself, as much, per- 
 haps more, than you do ; but receive it from an aged pilgrim 
 who, as she nears the solemn scenes of eternity, and more real- 
 izes the inexpressible joys that await, and the welcome that 
 will greet us there, is anxious that all the behevers who are 
 travelling the same road, might have their hearts and minds 
 more disentangled from earth and earthly things, and them- 
 selves unreservedly given to Christ. Have your lamp trimmed 
 and brightly burning, for every day and every hour bring us 
 nearer and nearer to our home." 
 
 The heart must be right with God, that can maintain a 
 fixed, filial, and confidential intercourse with the Holy One. 
 As the proximity of the compass to some false attraction de- 
 ranges its movements, and perils the bark it steers ; so the 
 Christian's heart, brought too near some creature object, or 
 some earthly good, flies off from God, and thus disturbs the 
 serenity, and retards the sanctity of the soul. But how envi- 
 able the conscious nearness to God, unveiled in the following 
 familiar epistle to her family ! — 
 
 " I could not forbear telhng you how graciously God is 
 dealing with my soul. There seems no distance between the 
 Lord and your unworthy mother. He draws nearer and still 
 nearer day by day. I cannot describe, for language fails me, 
 His exceeding gentleness, His tender. His almost speaking love 
 to my soul. How condescending is He in all His dealings and 
 varying dispensations ! I go to Him often in perplexity, not 
 knowing where to look ; and as a babe is hushed to quietness, 
 soothed and comforted on its mother's bosom, so the Lord 
 
184 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 cairns and quiets me. Even down to old age I ivill carry you^ 
 is His promise fulfilled in my experience. I cannot describe 
 the inconceivable enjoyment, mingled with much sorrow for 
 sin, I have had for these many weeks. And as I cannot de- 
 scriae, so I must leave it, praying that should the Lord ever 
 cause you to feel the world, and all that you have loved, in- 
 sufficient to impart one grain of real happiness, you may find 
 in Jesus all, and more than tongue can express, of what your 
 soul needs — an everflowing, overflowing fountain of indescrib- 
 able happiness and holy enjoyment. This is my sweet experi- 
 ence. I lie at His feet a poor, saved sinner, in sure and cer- 
 tain hope of eternal life already begun — heaven foreshadowed 
 and foretasted. May this encourage you, in a time of deep 
 need, to apply for, and expect similar blessings. Never, never 
 could it enter into the heart of man to conceive the rich gifts 
 there are in the heart of Christ for His saints. But He has re- 
 vealed a little to my weary spirit, and God be praised for His 
 wondrous condescension and grace, so richly bestowed upon 
 the chief of sinners. 
 
 The communion of the Lord's Supper has ever been regard- 
 ed by the spiritual Christian as an occasion of especial nearness 
 to Christ. It is then he seems to be brought the closest to the 
 cross. All other objects vanish from his view, and, like the 
 disciples on the mount, he feels himself with 'Jesus only,' 
 This was pre-eminently Mrs. Winslow's experience. The 
 occurrence of this institution was always a season of broken- 
 hearted and endeared communion with Jesus. She brought 
 nothing of her own to the Lord's table but her emptiness. 
 Lying at this beautiful gate of the temple in all her helpless- 
 ness and need, she fastened her believing eyes but upon one 
 object, 'expecting to receive something from Him,' or 'seeking 
 to catch something out of His mouth.' It was seldom indeed, 
 if ever, that she was sent empty away. Happy for the church 
 of God would it be if such scriptural and simple views of the 
 nature and design of this ordinance more generally prevailed ! 
 She thus describes her feelings on this hallowed occasion : — 
 
 "I trust the Lord was with us last evening, at His own 
 table to bless us. It is generally to me a feast of love, and of 
 close communion with Christ, I then feel I am more at lib- 
 erty to make any especial request at the hands of the Lord. 
 While I am trying in my poor way to remember Him, is it 
 likely that He will not at that moment more especially remem- 
 
COMFORT IX AFFLICTION. 185 
 
 ber me, the child who is looking full in His blessed face, for 
 an answer to her request ? It is a season of remembrance on 
 both sides. Jesus and His redeemed one meet together in 
 close contact and sacred fellowship. It is, too, a season of 
 melting love. The heart is softened ; Christ crucified for my 
 sins is placed before the eye ; deep repentance aud holy affec- 
 tion fill the soul." 
 
 It was to one of her family passing through a season of 
 relative and painful anxiety that she penned the following 
 letter so replete with comfort, and glowing with holy, elevated 
 feeling : — 
 
 '■''In the day of my trouble I ivill call upon Thee, for Thou 
 wilt ansiuer me. The Lord has favoured me this morning with 
 such a blessed interview, that my heart is full of His goodness, 
 and expression fails me quite. He is the same, the very same 
 that He ever was ; and all that He says is true, blessedly true. 
 He spake to Abraham, to Jacob, and to Moses, and to all the 
 prophets ; and He speaks to you and to me, the unworthiest 
 of all, the poorest of the poor, and the vilest of the vile. 
 Every new trial, and every fresh cross, drive me into the very 
 bosom of Jesus ; and it seems as if I could lie there, and feel 
 the very throbbings of His loving heart. In the cup of trial 
 we are called to drink, there is no wrath, all is love, though 
 faith may be tried, and we may for a season weep. Dearest 
 child, language fails me to tell you of the sweet condescension 
 of my God and your God, to my waiting, wrestling soul, this 
 morning. I could do little but weep, and my tears fall even 
 while I write. Surely Plis name is love, and w^e shall see 
 how needful this trial of our faith was. Whatever draws or 
 drives us to Christ is a mighty blessing. Who can be permit- 
 ted to have intercourse with God, and not find it a blessing ? 
 Can we come in close contact with Infinite Goodness and not 
 get good ? Dear child, all God has said to us in His word is 
 true ; heaven is true, and we are very near it. It is all around 
 us. Jesus is there before us — ^there to welcome us. Oh, to 
 realize it ! try and realize it. Every dispensation of His lov- 
 ing providence is to cause us to realize all that He has said. 
 He wants us to be more and more like Himself, and therefore 
 we should be more anxious to derive the full benefit of the 
 affliction, than that it should be removed. This is a time for 
 wresthng prayer with God, our own God. How needful are 
 these high winds and storms to cause us to cling to our heav- 
 
186 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 enlj Pilot, and to speed our way to our blessed harbour of 
 eternal rest. May this season of trial be fraught with a large 
 blessing. The Lord, I trust, after He has tried our faith and 
 
 blessed the affliction, will restore dear to us again. He 
 
 has ordered every circumstance attending it. Be fully per- 
 suaded of this. Satan often endeavours to work upon the 
 wretched infidelity of our nature, by leading us to look at 
 second causes. The Lord has done it, and the reason He will 
 by-and-by reveal to us. Prayer is continually offered up here 
 on her and your behalf, by your loving people. They have 
 proved their love to Jesus, and to you as one given to lead 
 them in the way to glory. I am thankful the Lord has sent 
 dear Mr, Evans to comfort you at this time. May He make 
 you a mutual blessing. Mr. Franklin is to preach. The post 
 has come. The Lord be praised for the good news. May He 
 give us grateful hearts for all His mercies " 
 
 " I received yours, and was glad to hear of your safe return 
 home ; and that the Lord not only preserved you in your jour- 
 ney, but was blessing your labours. He is everything to us ; 
 without Him we are wretched, and with Him we have all that 
 can be desired. What would heaven be without Jesus ! On 
 Friday evening I had a most blessed season. The Lord drew 
 sensibly near, filled my heart with love, and my mouth with 
 arguments, I felt I loved Him better than the dearest object 
 on earth, and could appeal to Him for the truth, who alone 
 could search the heart. It was a season of mutual love and 
 holy confidence, I pleaded for my children and for my chil- 
 dren's children, while His loving eye was upon, and his heart 
 tow^ards me, I wept for sin, and wept for joy, God caused 
 all His goodness to pass before me, and this it is that breaks 
 the heart of a poor sinner. It was one of those special seasons 
 I have been favoured wnth in my pilgrimage. I was again 
 favoured at family worship ; to my own soul it was a solemn, 
 endearing season, while I prayed for the conversion of the 
 whole household and all that were dear to me. The enemy 
 has since suggested that some heavy trial was near, and that 
 this was sent as a preparation. Well, I am His, and in His 
 own loving hands, and can fully trust Him for all," 
 
 TO HER SON R, F, W . 
 
 "I was glad to get your last, and am anxious to encourage 
 you to keep up the correspondence during the little space that 
 
LETTER TO HER SON, R.. F. W. 187 
 
 is now allowed your mother in this vale of tears. It is a 
 world lying in the wicked one, and we are encompassed about 
 with a body of sin and of death. It is a mercy that it is as 
 well with us as it is ; and above all, that our gracious and 
 long-suffering Father has given us such a bright and good hope 
 of a better one to come. God be praised that, vile as I am, 
 that hope shines brighter and brighter as I draw nearer the 
 
 end of my race. There is such a thing, my dear R , as, 
 
 in a measure, living with God even here. Take Him as your 
 dearest and best Friend. Treat Him as one to whom you can 
 fully confide your all. Never be afraid of opening your whole 
 heart to Him, however hateful you may feel it. Did you but 
 more know the depth of that love that is in the heart of Jesus, 
 you would never be reluctant to go to Him for all you needed. 
 It is to know the character of God as your Father in the per- 
 son of Jesus Christ, that can alone give you confidence in 
 Him. Dear child, a few years and you pass away to millions 
 and millions that await you. Waste not the little space allot- 
 ted you to prepare for them. I pray for you; you will never 
 know how often until we meet above. Oh, that I might have 
 the happiness of meeting you and all my dear children in 
 heaven ! Is it not worth living for ? Is it not worth dying 
 for? The ' signs of the times' declare that the coming of the 
 Lord draweth nigh. All sanctified hearts seem to feel this. 
 I seem myself, like a vessel that had weathered storm after 
 storm, and tempest after tempest, and at last was brought 
 within sight of my desired haven, but have not yet cast anchor. 
 But oh, the land is in sight, and it looks dehghtful to the eye. 
 
 Jesus is on his way. Dear H , who was always looking 
 
 for Him, will come with Him Remember, that to 
 
 walk in the precept is the way to the full enjoyment of the 
 promise. We must not expect the comfort of the one without 
 the observance of the other. Rather than incur debt, exer- 
 cise the most rigid self-denial. Go not against God, and God 
 will be for you. None ever disobey Him, but are sure to pay 
 the penalty of disobedience : I speak now of His own chil- 
 dren. The wicked are turned into hell, but His own elect are 
 punished here. Some men's sins go before to judgment ; some 
 men's sins follow after. The Christian has been brought to 
 judgment here, and acquitted. There is^ therefore^ now no 
 condemnation to them that are in Christ Jesus. And again. We 
 are chastened of the Lord, that we should not he condemned with 
 
188 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 the loorld. 1 Cor. xi. 32. Nev^er undertake a cause* without 
 kneeling down an'd asking tlic Lord for wisdom and grace. If 
 Solomon felt it needful to do this, well may you. Christ says, 
 Without me ye can do nothiurj. Be not fearful you will lose 
 your cause by so doing ; but only trust your case in the Lord's 
 hands, and if a just one, He will prosper you. Walk in His 
 fear, and you need fear nothing else. The account of your 
 visit to Mount Pleasant, and of our friends there, was very 
 interesting to me. I never lose sight of old friends, particu- 
 larly those whom I hope to meet in another world." 
 
 While on a visit to her son E , at Taplow, Bucks, she 
 
 met with a slight accident, the consequences of which might 
 have been severe, to which she thus gratefully refers : — 
 
 '■'■ Taplow. — Came here on the 25th, and am much recruited 
 
 in strength. Mr. and ]\Irs. E called, and passed an hour. 
 
 A few days ago, on returning from visiting a sick cottager, and 
 while conversing for a few minutes in the road with the medi- 
 cal man, about the young woman I had just left, his horse 
 backed the chaise ; and before either of us could get out of 
 the way, he was forced against the wall, and I was thrown 
 down, the wheel passing over my foot. I fainted, and was 
 carried home ; but on examination, no bones were found to be 
 broken, only a few cuts and bruises received, and so the Lord 
 preserved me from the greater evil. Enough of this, but not 
 enough of God's tender love in it all. Had my hip been dis- 
 located, as my dear mother's was by a much less accident, I 
 should have been crippled for the remainder of my Hfe. 
 What you said of God's adopted children was very sweet to 
 me to-day. How often one word — a simple sente-nce — when 
 applied by the Holy Ghost, gives comfort, and lifts one up ! 
 How much we need these helps all through our weary pil- 
 grimage ! We are such forgetful creatures ; too often forget- 
 ting what we are, and what a God He is." 
 
 "I have often thought of the goodness, kindness, and ten- 
 der sympathy of God, that though man had sinned and was 
 at enmity with his Creator, Benefactor, and Friend, so that 
 the ground was cursed for his sake, there should yet be so 
 much in this world to comfort, to alleviate, and delight; so 
 much still lingering of its pristine beauty to regale and please. 
 And if this world is still so attractive, so lovely to the eye 
 
 * Her son to whom these holy admonitions were addressed was then 
 practising at the American Bar. 
 
LETTER TO HER SON . 189 
 
 and pleasing to the senses, what must that world be which in- 
 finite love has gone to prepare for the redeemed and pure 
 spirits designed to inhabit it ! " 
 
 " I want to learn to live by the day, trusting God for the 
 daily supplies of His grace, and for the leadings of His provi- 
 dence ; leaving the morrow in His own blessed hand, who 
 knows how to give, and when to withhold." 
 
 From her Diary. — " This is a lovely day. Have had near- 
 ness to Jesus in prayer. Felt I loved Him above all earthly 
 love. Could recall all His past dealings, watchful provi- 
 dences, unwearied care, from infancy to the present moment. 
 I delight to trace before Him His wondrous dealings all my 
 journey through. Oh, what a God He has been to me ! and 
 what return? often the basest. How often these thoughts 
 bring forth tears from my aged eyes, in the remembrance of 
 what He has been to me, and what I have been to Him. I 
 think I love the saints above better than the saints below. 
 Their pure spirits look so lovely to me. Oh, the purity of 
 heaven ! what attraction has it to one conflicting at every 
 step with an unholy nature ! Precious Jesus, help and 
 strengthen Thy unworthy one in doing what is right in Thy 
 sight, I am Thine, and thou art mine." 
 
 TO HER SON 
 
 " I have just been trying to sing to your tune, my dear child, 
 that sweet hymn which we have often sung together, — 
 
 'There is a fountain fiU'd with blood, 
 Drawn from Emmanuel's veins.' 
 
 Oh that you and 1, and all we love, may be washed in that 
 blessed Fountain. May we live more to the honour of Him 
 whose precious blood it is. Oh, for more grace, more love, 
 more engagedness of heart in His blessed service, more wean- 
 edness from a poor dying, disappointing world, which at best 
 is but a cheat, promising much, but performing little. The 
 poor King of the French, Louis-Philippe, who, a few weeks 
 ago, sat proudly upon his throne, has just landed in England, 
 seeking an asylum in the political storm. When the steamer 
 that bore him and his family approached the shore, seeing a 
 number of people assembled, he was afraid to land, thinking 
 he should be insulted. In vain the people on board endeav- 
 oured to encourage him ; he insisted upon the vessel stopping 
 
190 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 until an individual went on shore, and returned with the assur- 
 ance to the dethroned monarch, that no indignity would be 
 offered him. He then ventured to land, shook hands with 
 several individuals, bowed to all around him, and stepped 
 hastily into the carriage that awaited him, expressino- his o-rati- 
 tude that he was on English ground, and that he had been re- 
 ceived with feelings of courtesy as a stranger in distress. Oh, 
 what a world is this ! What a mercy that we have a Friend 
 who rules over all. and who has said, / change noV' 
 
CHAPTER IX, 
 
 The believer's life is changeful and chequered. The path 
 along which he is retracing his steps back to paradise, is paved 
 with stones of variegated hues. And yet, painfully diversi- 
 fied as are often the events in his history, that very diversity 
 is as essential to the symmetry and completeness of his Chris- 
 tian character as are different shades of colouring to the per- 
 fection of a picture, or as opposite notes in music are to the 
 creation of harmony. " I will sing of mercy and of judgment ; 
 unto Thee, O Lord, will I sing." Mrs. Winslow was called 
 to record two events in her domestic history, singularly illus- 
 trative of this thought, in which two characteristic features of 
 her Christianity were beautifully exhibited — her unwavering 
 faith in suffering, and her grateful spirit in joy. 
 
 The first event to which we refer was the death of her son 
 
 H . His conversion has been alluded to. From the 
 
 time that he became a subject of Divine grace, during the 
 revival already narrated, he was to her, in the highest sense, 
 'a dear son,' a 'pleasant child,' 'tenderly loved of his mother.' 
 They took sweet counsel together, and walked to the house of 
 God in company. It was often his privilege to speak a word 
 of heart-cheer when her soul was depressed, and, by his filial 
 affection and sympathy, to fling many a warm sunbeam upon 
 her lone and shady path. He was in all respects worthy of 
 the grief she thus touchingly records in her Diary of his 
 decease : — 
 
 " April 2nd. — The Lord has again laid His chasening hand 
 upon me, but in love. Dear Henry is gone home, and I am 
 a bereaved mother. He sleeps in Jesus, that is my only com- 
 fort ; and oh, what a comfort it is ! Oh, to be with Jesus, — 
 that is happiness. It is happiness to walk with Him here, 
 but what happiness to see Him as He is, and to behold His 
 glory. And now, dear, precious Henry, thou art beholding 
 [1911 
 
192 MEMOIR OP MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 Him in all His glory, whom thou didst long to r^ee coming in 
 that glory in the clouds of heaven. How highly favoured 
 thou hast been ! Oh for faith to see this, to me, painful dis- 
 pensation in its true light. Let not your heart he troubled ; ye 
 believe in God, believe also ^V^ me. Lord, I believe ; help thou my 
 unbelief. Oh, to believe that Jesus is indeed at the right hand 
 
 of God ! If He is there, H is there too, and I shall meet 
 
 him again. On the resurrection of Christ depends our eternal 
 all. Upon that single and glorious truth hinges every other. 
 If that be true, all that He has said, all that He has promised, 
 and all that He has engaged to do, is true. Lord, increase 
 
 my faith, and sanctify this trial to us all. Dear received 
 
 the mournful intelligence, and immediately left home, and 
 
 came to me, to comfort me under my trouble. Dear H 
 
 was taken to his happy rest on Saturday morning, and spent 
 a happy Sabbath with the Lord of the Sabbath. He was 
 fully prepared for the change, and was more fitted for heaven 
 than for earth. The world seemed to have no charms for him. 
 It had lost its hold for a long period. He w^as livmg in full 
 expectation of Christ's coming, and now he is with Him whom 
 he so ardently longed to see. Day and night he was looking 
 for Him, as if hastening unto the corning of the Lord ; so that 
 Christ was in all his thoughts. Ought I not to rejoice that he 
 has realized his wish, though not in the way he anticipated ? 
 When he had to grapple with the 'last enemy,' he feared not 
 death ; and, to use his own w^ords, ' longed to clap his glad 
 wings and fly to Jesus.' May God, in His tender mercy, be 
 the Father to the fatherless, and the widow's God." 
 
 " 5th. — I love to contemplate him there, to think of the 
 welcome he has received, first from Jesus, and then from the 
 dear ones who had gone a little before him. All is now per- 
 fect knowledge, perfect purity, perfect love. If communion 
 with departed spirits is attainable, I have realized something 
 of it. I have felt such a nearness to him, and such soothing 
 from knowing that he was quite safe and happy with Christ. 
 How sweet, how comforting is the thought that I shall see him 
 sooner than if he had continued on earth. Heaven is nearer 
 to me than New York.* This affliction has wafted me closer 
 to my happy home. Oh to realize it fully even /zere." 
 
 * " Do you think your daughter lost, when she is but sleeping in the 
 bosom of the Almio-hty ? Think her not absent who is in such a Friend's 
 house. Is she lost to you, who is found to Christ ? He is an ill debtor 
 
DEATH OP HER SOX H. 193 
 
 A few extracts from one or two letters penned at this time 
 of her affliction will still further evidence the submissive, 
 heaven-breathing spirit with which she bowed to this chasten- 
 ing of love. She thus addresses the bereaved widow of her 
 son : — 
 
 " What can I say to comfort you, my dear J , in this 
 
 heavy trial, while I feel heartbroken myself? I trust ere this 
 the true Comforter has enabled you to cast your heavy burden 
 upon Him, who has promised to be a Father to the fatherless, 
 and the widow's God, The shock that I have received has 
 brought me a little nearer to my home ; and my great comfort 
 is that I shall see my dear child much sooner than if he had 
 remained where he was. Heaven seems nearer to me than 
 New York, and dear Henry nearer too. It seems but a step 
 and I am there, where there is no more sin, nor death, and 
 where all tears are for ever wiped away. This is a vale of 
 tears. I have been a child of sorrow, and yet not one trial too 
 many have I had. Dear Henry was more fit for heaven than 
 for earth. The Lord has been weaning him from things below 
 for some time, preparing him for a better home above. He 
 was looking for Jesus, and longing to see Him, and the Lord 
 has given him his wish in His own way and time. We must 
 not look at second causes. Every circumstance connected 
 with God's children, living or dying, is ordered by Himself. 
 He has not gone a moment sooner or a moment later than God 
 had appointed. Chosen in Christ before the world was, so 
 were all things connected with him here wisely and mercifully 
 ordered. Oh, I love to think of him with Jesus, mingling 
 with the pure spirits above, and long to join them. ... Go 
 to Jesus for all you need. Take Him as your true, your best, 
 your only Friend. There is not another like Him. Take Him 
 as your brother born for adversity. The oftener you go to 
 Him, the more welcome you will be, and the better acquainted. 
 You were His child before, but now you are His widowed 
 child, and have a double claim upon Him. Put in your claim. 
 Do not first go to an arm of flesh, and then to Christ. But 
 go to Christ first, before you make up your mind as to the 
 course you should take. Ami to bring up your children for 
 eternity. May the Lord bless, comfort, and guide you, is my 
 constant prayer." 
 
 who payetli that which he boiroweth with a grudge. Prepare yourself; 
 you are nearer your daughter this day than yesterday. It is self-love 
 in u? that maketh Ui= mourn for them that die in the Lord." — Rritherford. 
 
194 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 TO MRS. C . 
 
 " I have not written to you for some time, although my 
 thouo-hts have wandered to you. I have been in trouble. The 
 Lord has laid His loving hand again upon me. I know it is 
 in love to my soul, and not one unkind feehng has lurked in 
 mj heart towards Him. He has taken home to His own 
 bosom one of my dear and justly loved sons ; my dear Henry 
 is with Jesus. He has sweetly housed my child, leaving me 
 one the less on earth, and one more to welcome me to glory. 
 Dear friend, in spite of all I know of His goodness, my poor 
 heart has deeply felt this stroke, and the shock to my nerves 
 has brought me a httle nearer to the grave ; but the support 
 and consolation I have experienced under it, have amply re- 
 paid me for all I have suffered. Oh the goodness of God 
 towards unworthy me ! What can I render unto Him for all 
 His loving-kindness and tender mercies towards me and my 
 departed one ? I have not the shadow of a doubt of his hap- 
 piness at this moment. There was not one in my family, not 
 myself excepted, who was so thoroughly prepared for this 
 great change as he. He was brought to the feet of Jesus at 
 nineteen, and since then has held on his way, carrying out the 
 principles of the gospel in his life and conversation. He had 
 much of the Spirit of Christ, manifested in all kindness and 
 benevolence, even, as some thought, to a feult. For the last 
 two years he has been looking for the coming of Christ, and 
 imagined, with many others, that the time was near. So did 
 the Lord prepare him for his inheritance. Dear as he was, I 
 would not recall him for a thousand worlds. If there is such 
 a thing as connnunion with departed spirits, I think I have felt 
 something of its sweetness. Oh the comfort, the rich consola- 
 tion and blessing, this trying dispensation has afforded me ! It 
 has enabled me to realize the unseen realities of the eternal 
 world. ... I long to hear how your soul prospers. You are 
 the Lord's, His portion for ever ; and He is training you and 
 me for our happy inheritance. Oh, let us try and live up to it. 
 What are the various sorrows of the way, compared with the 
 glory that shall be revealed in us ? May the Lord lead us into 
 an experimental knowledge of Jesus. No other is worth hav- 
 ing, living or dying. As I draw near the confines of eternity, 
 how poor and contemptible is everything that has not Christ 
 in it, — Christ first, Christ last, and Christ all through. Jesus 
 must be all in all, or He is nothing. Oh, to be ready, quite 
 
195 
 
 ready, to obey the welcome summons, to believe all that God 
 has promised us in His word, and to live more under the sancti- 
 fying influence of the Holy Spirit within us. We must honour 
 the Spirit more than we do, and He will honour us, by reveal- 
 ing more of Christ to us, and in us the hope of glory. . . ." 
 
 From her diary. — " Received a letter from J , announc- 
 ing the death of her mother, six weeks after my dear H . 
 
 This is a severe stroke to her. May it lead her closer to Jesus. 
 She would, perhaps, have leaned more upon her mother than 
 upon Christ, and so He removed this prop too. He will have 
 His people lean upon Him alone. I hope she was ready for 
 the change. Oh, to be quite ready ! O Lord, keep me mind- 
 ful of my latter end. Prepare me for that great change. 
 Confirm me in the truth of Thy precious resurrection; and 
 when the time comes, take away all fear of death and the 
 grave, and let me see Thy face. Thy welcome face, all through 
 that dark valley, and give me an abundant entrance into Thy 
 kingdom of glory above. Absent from the body, I shall be 
 present with the Lord. To be with Thee, will be heaven. 
 Come, Lord Jesus, come quickly." 
 
 The second event to which we refer (although not occurring 
 at the same time) was well calculated to illustrate another fea- 
 ture of her religion — her praiseful spirit in joy. The conver- 
 sion of her daughter to Christ, was in answer to the wrest- 
 lings which had broken the stillness of many a midnight hour, 
 and was the precious fruit of a faith that had long and patient- 
 ly travailed. Ever on the alert to win a soul to the Saviour, 
 the decision of one for Him, so near and so justly beloved, 
 would enkindle in her heart a joy such as none but a mother, 
 a Christian mother, and such a Christian mother, could feel. 
 Her private journal thus records this pleasing occurence : — 
 
 "April 30th. — About two months ago, the Lord most gra- 
 ciously answered my prayers, in bringing my dearest E 
 
 to sit at the feet of Jesus. She is now a child of God, par- 
 doned, justified, and adopted into His family, and walking in 
 that narrow, blessed way that leads to life eternal. God be 
 praised for His marvellous goodness to her and to me. Oh, 
 he is, in very deed, a God hearing and answering prayer. I 
 receive it as a precious earnest of greater things to come. 
 dearest Lord, I cannot rest until all are called, and all call 
 Thee blessed. A dear company of believers meet several 
 times in the week, unitedly to pray and wrestle for the out- 
 
196 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 pouring of the Holy Spirit. This is what I have long been 
 urging upon the minds of the pastor and the people, and now 
 it has commenced. Lord, hear ! Lord, pardon our luke- 
 warmness, and come with all Thy glorious train, and take a 
 full possession of every heart, and bring rebellious sinners to 
 relinquish their enmity, and bow to Thy rightful sceptre. Let 
 Thy kingdom come, and Thy will be done on earth, even as 
 it is done in heaven. Amen and amen." 
 
 "May 10th. — Still feeble in body, but oh, how thankful at 
 times ! My heart overflows with love to Him who is to me 
 an ocean of love. Eternity, eternity will only be sufficient for 
 my song of praise and thanksgiving. Dear E 's conver- 
 sion has lifted me nearer to God. Jesus lives, still lives to an- 
 swer prayer, and give life to the dead." 
 
 "i/O, God hath given thee all that sail n-ith thee."— Acta xxvii; 24. 
 
 "Father! who o'er time's boisterous tide 
 
 A precious bark art steering ; 
 Mother ! who anxious at his side 
 
 Each distant storm art hearing ; 
 Bind ye the promise to your heart, 
 
 Thus by the angel spoken ; 
 Believe ye that your circle blest 
 
 Shall gain the port unbroken. 
 
 *' "When stranded on the rock of woe, 
 
 Life's last faint watch-light burnetii, 
 And shuddermg toward that bourn to go 
 
 From whence no guest returueth, — 
 Then may each bark yowr love has launch'd. 
 
 Gliding with sail unriven, 
 Send forth a seraph soul to form 
 
 Your family in heaven." 
 
 "God, in the riches of His grace, grant that it may be so 
 with my own dear ones ; and I believe it will, for God has 
 said to me, I will he a Father to thy fatherless children. For 
 Jesus' sake, hear my prayer, Lord, my God." 
 
 TO ONE OF HER SONS. 
 
 " My mind, body, and whole heart, are engaged in the 
 blessed work of the Lord, which is now going on. Precious 
 
 E 's conversion is a pledge to me of greater blessings to 
 
 come. God is a great God, and He loveth to do great things 
 like Himself; and I come not in my own most worthless name, 
 
THE BLESSING OF EARLY DLSCIPLINE. 197 
 
 but in the name of a great Saviour, in whom He is well pleased, 
 and who has said, Ask anything in my name, and I will do it. 
 Here is encouragement for a poor w^orm of the dust, to come 
 with large demands upon the rojal bounty of the King of 
 kings and Lord of lords. We have constant meeting for 
 prayer for the outpouring of the Holy Spirit. The hearts of 
 God's people are stirred up to wrestle for the blessing, and be 
 
 assured we shall receive it. E 's conversion has awakened 
 
 many to inquiry, and has done much good. She is indeed a 
 new creature. Glory to God in the highest, for this mighty 
 blessing. 
 
 " Last evening dear Mr, Evans met his Bible class, both 
 male and female, in the body of the chapel. It was full, and 
 solemn as eternity. E returned w4th her mind much en- 
 gaged, and rejoicing in the prospect of the blessings that 
 would follow such a solemn and deeply interesting service." 
 
 It often seems good to Him who is " excellent in council 
 and wonderful in working," to bring early to the proof the 
 grace He early gives. Painful and mysterious as this may 
 appear at the time, it is yet in after years that the reason, as 
 the results, of such a procedure, is more apparent. "When 
 the duties of life increase, and with them, life's trials — when a 
 matured Christian experience, a strongly-developed character, 
 and a mellowed judgment, are demanded, — it is theniho, Chris- 
 tian reaps the golden harvest of his early training, and traces 
 the infinite wisdom and love which in the first and gentlest 
 evolvings of his faith marked for him a path of early suffering. 
 Thus immense and far-reaching are the blessings which flow 
 from sanctified sorrov*-. The illness of her daughter, while 
 yet in the glow of her new-born joy, elicited from Mrs. Wins- 
 low's pen some of the most affecting expressions of her quick 
 and tender sympathy. The following choice extracts, com- 
 posed at this and at other periods, are culled from her 
 
 letters to her daughter. 
 
 "Dearest E , 
 
 " I have just been praying for you, and oh, that a 
 good and gracious God might condescend to send down an- 
 swers of peace to the petitions offered in the name of Jesus, 
 His own well-beloved Son. I cannot hear until to-morrow 
 what Dr. Jephson says, and wishes you to do ; so I must con- 
 tinue to look up. Oh for more precious faith ; I feel I need 
 
198 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 it. May you enjoy much of the presence of Him who can 
 make a sick room a Bethel to your soul. All places where 
 He is, are a heaven below. That presence can make every 
 cup of affliction sweet. May God give all needful judgment 
 to Dr. J., and incline you strictly to adhere to his advice. I 
 have prayed continually that wisdom might be imparted to 
 him. Now that you are in his hands, my mind is compara- 
 tively composed." 
 
 " I have been desponding about you this morning, precious 
 child. Oh that God, my God and your God, may answer my 
 prayers in His rich mercy ! I know that He always hears 
 them. I believe that there is not a single petition put up by 
 a child of His, however faintly expressed that petition may 
 be, but He hears it. The smallest degree of faith will send it 
 not only into the ear, but into the heart of God. The Spirit 
 indites it, and Christ, the believer's surety and advocate, pre- 
 sents it, sprinkled with His own precious blood, to the Father. 
 How can a poor believer ever fiiil, in his lowest state, of hav- 
 ing the perfections of God — His power, love, and faithfulness 
 — encircling him moment by moment? His tender heart now 
 enters into all your weakness and pain, and all is sent in love 
 to your precious soul, more precious in the sight of God than 
 ten thousand worlds." 
 
 " The Lord stretch forth His healing hand, and restore you 
 to health and strength ; and may He cause your soul, above 
 all, to prosper and be in health. Surely our times are in His 
 hands^ who loves us better than w^e love ourselves. Oh, to 
 trust Him wholly ! He careth for us. How much easier at 
 times it seems to trust Him w^ith our eternal all, than with the 
 inferior concerns of a few short and uncertain years. I have 
 
 just been reading the Journal of Sir A 's Scripture Reader. 
 
 Sir A 's remarks on the iniquity of removing such men 
 
 from a sphere of usefulness, on the plea that they interfere Avith 
 clerical duties, are excellent. . . You are in your Father's 
 hands, and besides, Jesus was the healer of bodily disease, 
 when on earth, as well as spiritual. Is He less so now ? By 
 no means. Have faith in this Physician ; He is able, and as 
 willing as He is able, to do us all possible good. Simple, child- 
 like faith, a constant coming and looking to Jesus, will do won- 
 ders. Have not I called upon him in trouble, times without 
 number, and has He ever denied me ? Never, no never in any 
 one instance. Oh to know the character of God ! When He 
 
LETTERS TO HER DAUGHTER. 199 
 
 imparts a glimpse even of Himself, it seems as if the heart 
 could not contain Avhat it feels. To behold Him in Jesus, 
 sheds a holy mildness, gentleness, and lustre over all His great 
 and glorious attributes. I am at a loss at times for language 
 to express what I feel." 
 
 " I often think, how could I live without a throne of grace ! 
 It is a sure refuge, a resting-place to my soul, endeared by a 
 thousand most tender, soul-humbling, soul-refreshing interviews 
 ■with the God of heaven, — the God of love to me and mine. 
 How sweet to draw near to Him, and hear the whispers of the 
 still, small voice of the Spirit, reproving, counselling, and sooth- 
 ing the too often turbulent and excited feelings of the soul ! 
 My dear child, you need never mourn that you are fatherless, 
 since God, the eternal God, is your own Father, better than 
 ten thousand earthly parents. Oh, trust Him fully ; open your 
 wliole heart to Him ; tell Him all you wish, all you feel, all 
 you fear. Keep nothing back. He will remove all that is 
 wrong, set everything right, and keep you quietly resting in 
 the embrace of His matchless love. It is a heaven below, to 
 be I assive in His hands, and know no \vill but His, believing 
 tliat His is best." 
 
 " Taplow. — I could sing of the praises of the Lord by day 
 and by night. He is the joy of my heart ; yea. He is my life. 
 So may He ever be to you. Cling to Him, nor let Him go. 
 If He hides himself behind a cloud, it is only to make you more 
 earnest in seeking Him. Go again and again, until you find 
 Him. Think of a poor sinful mortal holding converse with 
 God, the mighty God, the everlasting Father ! But so it is. 
 Be not satisfied with a commonplace Christianity. How^ many 
 there are who have no certainty as to their union with Christ, 
 are satisfied with a lifeless form, and go no further. Ah, what 
 losers they are ! No tongue can tell the blessedness, when 
 the believer can testify at times that he is with God, and that 
 
 God is with him. Give my love to dear Lady L , and to 
 
 dear C . I feel much love to that dear child. May the 
 
 Lord draw her nearer and nearer to Himself. He has given 
 her one who fears Him, which is a sweet token to her of the 
 love He has towards her. Let us watch the gracious hand of 
 our God in all His eventful providences. How circumspect 
 should we be, yet not w^alking in bondage, but as dear children, 
 watched over and directed by a tender, loving Father, whose 
 aim is to make us hap2:)y here, and eternally happy hereafter," 
 
200 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 "Yesterday we were at Windsor Castle. It was a solemn 
 sermon to my soul. Where are all those kings and queens, 
 and other great ones, whose pictures and monuments cover 
 these walls ? Where are they now ? They have passed away, 
 and all the pomp and shov*^ that surrounded them liere has 
 vanished with them. Oh, how trifiing does everything appear 
 but tlie one thing needful ! We, too, are passing away ; and 
 vrhat a mercy if enabled to say, 'I am going to my Father's 
 home above, my happy home, prepared by Him who laid 
 down His life for me.' " 
 
 " May the Lord in mercy keep us in liealth, best of all, in 
 soul-prosperity ; for I have had to learn that the wealth and 
 honours of this poor, dying world cannot compensate for the 
 loss of the sweet and precious life-giving influence of the Holy 
 Spirit within. My soul has of late been much tried, so that it 
 has been a trial to me to open my mouth in prayer ; and often, 
 when I did, a cloud would pass that obscured every ray of 
 divine light. My soul seemed like a bark at sea, without a 
 helm to steer or a pilot to guide it. And yet the Lord has 
 not been quite out of sight in private prayer. Like Mary, I 
 have been ready to say, Jliey have taken away my Lord., and I 
 hnow not ivhere they have laid Him. And yet, like her, I have 
 stood weeping and sorrowing after Him. This may be owing 
 to a pressure on the nerves and an over-tried mind ; but this I 
 know, when I turn within to search for the cause, I see so 
 much reason that God should thus chasten me, that I only 
 wonder He should ever cast a look of mercy towards me. 
 Unprofitable, unprofitable servant I feel I have been all my 
 life, and am compelled to lay my mouth in the dust before 
 Him. Such have been my feelings of late, and yet, though 
 cast down, I am not in despair, blessed be God. When he 
 has tried me, I shall come forth as gold, I trust, and shall yet 
 praise Him who is the health of mv countenance and my 
 God." 
 
 It was during this domestic trial — the illness of her daughter 
 — that she received the following characteristic letter from her 
 Pastor, the Rev. J. H. Evans, touchingly expressive of the 
 sacred sympathy peculiar to the beloved writer. 
 
 "John Street, July G. 
 " My beloved Friend and dearly-esteemed Sister in 
 Jesus, our sympathizing Head, — 
 
 "How much did I wish to see von vo.-lerdav before vou 
 
LETTER FROM REV. J. H. EVANS. 201 
 
 left for Leamington, but it was out of my power. "We can do 
 but little — nothing. Jesus has all, is all, can do all, and will 
 put all forth in our necessities, be they ever_so deep. You 
 shall find him everything in this your need of all things — a 
 very present help. We could never know His heart but for 
 our troubles, never know His grace but for our worthlessness. 
 There is a tenderness in the love of the Saviour which our 
 miseries, I will not say draw out, but exhibit. In no other 
 school could we learn it. Be not afraid, dear and precious sis- 
 ter, of the form in which His loving hand has placed you ; He 
 will come and sit by you, and should it be painful to the flesh 
 and the spirit too. He can smooth it. One smile of his can 
 
 dry up all your tears. Your dear and precious E is more 
 
 near to Him than she is to you, dearly as you love her. Oh ! 
 leave her in His hands. He has a right to her. And wheth- 
 er He lend her to you for a little longer or not, yet He will 
 have you trust her with Him. His is a tender bosom, and 
 tenderly has He borne up your weary head in many a weary- 
 ing day, and sleepless night. He said that He would, and He 
 has done it according to His word, and He will yet do it, be- 
 cause He has said that He will. 
 
 "I was lately told of a dear brother who said that when he 
 first thought of losing his only daughter — and he had but one 
 other child — he felt that he could not part with her ; but when 
 he followed her body into the churchyard it seemed as if he 
 was going to her wedding. This was the husband of Lady L. 
 S. What cannot grace do ? Dear and precious sister, may 
 the all-sufficient God and precious Saviour be your sufficient 
 help in your deep trial. He alone can. My best love to dear 
 
 and his wife. Thank her for her kind letter. My 
 
 tender love to dear E., when she can bear to be told of it." 
 
 FROM HER JOURNAL. 
 
 "Brighton, Feb. 6. 
 " Came here a week ago. ... I have just had some sweet 
 interviews Avith a young Christian for whom the Lord has 
 done great things. Surrounded by v/orldly connexions and 
 worldly prosperity, yet brought to sit at the feet of Jesus, and 
 blessedly taught by the Spirit, I was interested to find so young 
 a creature in so short a time (only two years) with such a 
 deep experience of spiritual things. The Lord has laid ill 
 health at her door, so that she has her cross to carry, but it 
 
 Or 
 
202 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 has been most graciously sanctified to her soul's best interests. 
 . . . The Lord be praised for all His tender mercies and 
 loving-kindnesses — unceasmg and unwearying as His love. 
 My continual shortcomings, and oftcoming for forgiveness again 
 and again, does not exhaust Him. I should have wearied out 
 the whole host of heaven before this ; but Jesus is never wea- 
 ried with hearing the cries of His poor tried and tempted 
 saints. Always are they welcome, and I think the oftener I 
 go, the more welcome I am. Not a frown upon that counte- 
 nance towards one wdio really feels his need of Him. A smil- 
 ing welcome, fraught with mighty blessings, which, while it 
 gladdens the heart, fills the soul with a humlDling sense of its 
 own vileness, — humbled in self, exalted in Christ." 
 
 " I want to live more on high, — more above the world and 
 all its little things. Oh, for wisdom to enable me to discharge 
 all relative duties without being cumbered ; to live in heavenly 
 places in Christ Jesus. The Lord has strengthened me to 
 maintain family worship ; the people of the house regularly 
 attending, and gratified in being permitted to come. The Lord 
 helps me to speak a word now and then in His name, and gives 
 me liberty in prayer ; and yet I feel quite unequal in body and 
 mind. I feel it a cross, but dare not withdraw. May the 
 Lord forgive all my mistakes, my reluctance to do what I felt 
 it was my duty to do. But oh, how good and how kind He has 
 been to me ! What a God, no one can know or tell but my- 
 self. It almost breaks my heart when I think of the w^ondrous 
 love He bears towards one so utterly worthless. I am wea- 
 ried to find I do not get on, except in knowing more of my 
 wretchedness and vileness, and more of the sufficiency of 
 Jesus, and the absolute necessity of going to Him for every- 
 thing I need, and living upon Him moment by moment. But 
 this is to be learnt out by means of much ploughing of the 
 Holy Ghost upon the renewed heart, and this through the 
 providence of God. God's providence acts as the handmaid 
 to faith ; and there is not a truth in God's word but what must 
 be learnt out in the same way and by the same process. Oh, 
 to be a real Christian ! This is no easy matter. How many 
 trials and crosses, ups and downs, are needful to fit us for the 
 mansion Jesus has gone to prepare for us ! And as soon as 
 our education is complete. He takes us home to the full enjoy- 
 ment of our inheritance above. Blessed be God for the hope 
 He has given us in the gospel of His d(\ir Son." 
 
LETTER TO HER SON, . 203 
 
 " 13tli. — A stormy day — the sea in a foam. Heard a ser- 
 mon on tlie llesstdness of the man unto whom God imjmted 
 rigldcousntss icithout loorks. The great conflict in my soul 
 when I first sought the Lord was, how I was to be saved 
 without works, for I had no works to come with. How bless- 
 edly did Jesus manifest Himself to me that night, and say to 
 me, ' I am thy salvation without thy works ; ' — a night to be 
 remembered throughout eternity ! Bless the Lord, my soul! 
 Hitherto has He blessed me, chastened, upheld, and comforted 
 me ; and even down to old age has He carried me." 
 
 "This morning, was led in prayer to ask the Lord, if it were 
 good in His sight, to make me in some way a humble instru- 
 ment in His hands of good to Lord 's precious, never-dying 
 
 soul. It came twice, after waking from sleep, so forcibly to 
 my mind, that I felt I must pray for him. How could I show 
 my regard in a more suitable way than in praying that he 
 might know what it was to possess durable riches and honours; 
 for oh, how far do they exceed all earthly glory ! Oh, to know 
 to a certainty that God hears the prayers of His saints, and 
 not one shall ever be disregarded. The Spirit indites them, 
 the Son presents them in the incense of His own sacrifice, and 
 God the Father is well pleased to honour them for Christ's 
 sake and His own. After offering up my humble petition for 
 Lord , the thought occurred to me, how utterly impossi- 
 ble it was for me to be of any spiritual service, circumstances 
 like mountains preventing. But the thought again occurred, 
 what are mountains in the way of the Lord's purposes ? He 
 can do all things, and He can do this. There I leave it. My 
 request has been made, and if not through me, yet through 
 some other means, may God bless him and save his soul at 
 last." 
 
 TO HER SON O . 
 
 "Brighton, Feb. 18th. 
 
 "E went to the Town Hall, at a meeting for the Jews, 
 
 last night. Dr. Marsh spoke, and also his son. She says the 
 latter spoke remarkably well and to the purpose. We have a 
 nice circle of friends here, which makes it pleasant. As it 
 respects myself, one or two to whom I can speak of Jesus, of 
 Him whom my soul loveth, is quite sufficient. What a com- 
 pany I shall meet (if permitted to get there) in heaven ! It 
 makes me long at times to depart and be with them. I feel 
 
204 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY VvINSLOW. 
 
 i hat all is true that is written of Him ; and if so, I shall see 
 llim and be with Him for ever. On His resurrection hangs 
 all my hope. If He is risen, my soul is as safe as if it were 
 there now. The whole truth of the gospel hangs on the res- 
 urrection of Christ. I am writing with the ocean full in view, 
 and it looks beautiful and serene." 
 
 "22nd. — How continually is the Christian's experience vary- 
 ing, chiefly through the varying providences of God ! There 
 is a close connexion between what is passing within the 
 believer and what is transpiring without; both engaged in 
 furthering the work of the Lord in His kingdom of grace in 
 the soul. There is no cessation. The Spirit unceasing in His 
 work, and Satan as busily engaged in thw^arting it, through 
 the artful and corrupt propensities of the flesh. How heartily 
 do I hate the flesh, and long to drop the body of sin, and be 
 done with it for ever," 
 
 "Monday It seems a long time to w^ait for the post, 
 
 before I can hear how the Lord has been dealing Avith you on 
 the Sabbath. Had I not Him to look to for comfort, I know 
 not what I should do. Yesterday, again and again I lifted up 
 my burdened heart for you ; and last evening, at our feast of 
 love (the Lord's Supper), I forgot you not. That is always 
 an especial season of sweet communion between my soul and 
 my God. Jesus sits at His table, and I am permitted to sit at 
 His blessed feet, and many gracious tokens of love do I re- 
 ceive. Last evening, w4iile thus communing, He gave me a 
 gentle rebuke, which dissolved my heart into holy contrition, 
 and laid me in the dust ; but oh, how condescending His love, 
 no tongue can tell ! I w^ept — He pardoned — showed me His 
 loving lie art, and made me weep still more. My great sin was 
 in looking to an arm of flesh, instead of the living God ; that 
 God w^lio lias said, / loill never leave thee, nor forsake thee. 
 This produced a murmuring spirit, and sorrow followed in its 
 train. But I was to go to the table where Jesus sat, and 
 obtain a full view of Him, before my sin w^as discovered to 
 me ; and then did I prostrate myself before Him, confessing 
 my sin, and He forgave it all. He looked upon me as- benig- 
 nantly and lovingly as He did upon Peter, and this brought 
 my ingratitude and unbelief — God-dishonouring unbelief — to 
 mind ; and I fell before Him humbled, penitent, and forgiven. 
 Is not this just like Jesus? The text was. Let us draw near ; 
 and truly did a good and gracious God draw near to me, uii- 
 
LETTER TO HER SON, . 203 
 
 worthy though I was ; and my prayer then ascended, that He 
 would draw near to you and bless you with strong faith in 
 His love ; for there is no love like the love of God. The faint 
 glimmer of a rushlight, compared with the brightest noonday 
 sun, is the love of the creature, the tenderest and the fondest, 
 in comparison with the wondrous, boundless love of God in 
 our nature — God is us." 
 
 "... I have nothing particularly new to tell you; but 
 when I remember that the Lord is especially in all the events 
 of His providence towards His people, I ought not to say I 
 have no good news to tell you. Jesus reigns, and that is good 
 news, though not new to you. And yet we require to be con- 
 tinually reminded of it, for we are prone in our v,-orldliness to 
 lose sight of it, and then, like the Israelites, we murmur. 
 Jesus is alive, and at the right hand of the Majesty on high. 
 He is at the helm, guiding our vessel skilfully and safely 
 through all dangers and storms, ever varying and changing, 
 through this eventful voyage ; and He Avill most assuredly 
 bring us at last to anchor, where all suffering, and trial, and 
 perils are at an end for ever, in that harbour of perfect rest 
 which remaineth for the people of God. . . . Civil affairs are 
 just now in rather a perplexed, transition state. They cannot 
 form a government. How wonderful the way God takes to 
 accomplish His mighty purposes in this lower world ! Who 
 would have thought that the potato disease would have been 
 the means of overthrowing the government, v,'hich but a short 
 time ago seemed so strong and powerful ? But so it is. Sir 
 Eobert Peel was for opening the ports ; the Duke was not ; 
 and this broke up the Cabinet. Oh, how truly God is in all 
 things ! By the most trivial and mean things, in His allwise, 
 wonderful providence. He performs His wonders and accom- 
 plishes His purposes. Never mistrust Him. Let us keep from 
 unbelief, walk uprightly, and no good thing will He withhold." 
 
 " Lord's day. ... I have prayed again and again to-day 
 for you, remembering the vast importance of the subject on 
 which you are to preach ; and oh, may the Holy Ghost descend 
 with all His mighty power upon preacher, saint.^, and sinners, 
 that great good may be done in the name of Jesus to the glory 
 of the Tri-une Jehovah. I was enabled, though feeling unv/ell, 
 to be at the house of God this morning. The text was. The 
 way of life is above to the ivise, thai he may depart from hell 
 beneath, Prov. xv. 24. He was excellent, as usual, and spoko 
 
206 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 with apparent comfort ; but, Lord, I long to see a Avhole 
 congregation brought under the power of the Holy Spirit. 
 There is a constant hearing of sermons, but nothing effectually 
 done in comparison with what ought to be done. Slumbering 
 saints and dead sinners compose most of the congregations. 
 Oh ! for more of the power of prayer among the children of 
 the kingdom. How my soul longs for it ! How I wish I 
 heard in those who wait upon the sanctuary more of the enjoy- 
 ment of the truth in their own souls, and of the sensible 
 presence of the Lord. How sweet it is to have the enjoyment 
 of nearness to God ; and how can we feel near to Him and 
 not express our gratitude and love for His kind condescension ? 
 We know when we have the society of, and enjoy intercourse 
 with, an earthly friend ; how much more endearing and soul- 
 refreshing is that of our Heavenly Friend ! The defect is, we 
 do not have His sensible presence, and this is our own fault, 
 and not His ; for the essence of His nature is love — ^love, free, 
 unbounded to the poorest, the vilest, who look for it, expect it, 
 and will not be satisfied without it. The secret is, we grow 
 cold towards this precious Friend, and are then satisfied to do 
 without an expression of His love. No wonder dear Mr. Evans 
 remarked to-day that 'there were none so basely ungrateful on 
 earth as God's own children. And so it is." 
 
 " How often does God answer prayer by terrible things in 
 righteousness ! When we are in a thick mist we can discern 
 nothing, and are anxious to escape from its perils. But, as it 
 rolls away, we begin to see a gleam of light, and hail it as the 
 commencement of a fuller and brighter discovery. Now this 
 is often the case w^ith the objects of God's everlasting love. 
 We pray for what we believe would promote our happiness 
 and the comfort of others, and for the glory of God. Perhaps 
 we do not in so many words ask for this favour ; but we 
 earnestly desire it in oiu: hearts, and often plan in our minds 
 how it may be brought about. God sees the heart's fond wish, 
 presently iEIe brings us, by His all-wise providence, to the very 
 thing we desired ; but oh ! in such a different way from what 
 we had planned in our own minds. And yet, how much more 
 effectually has He done it than we had thought. Such is our 
 God, and it is a mercy when we do see His blessed hand in 
 every dispensation towards His own elect. But how few — 
 how very few — wat'^h the hand and the doings of God, and 
 lacking this, they continue blind to His great goodness and His 
 
LETTER TO HER SON, . 207 
 
 unceasing care. How many walk with a sickly Christianity, 
 and although often tried, they seem not to profit from their 
 trials, because they are not earnest in watching God's loving 
 hand. For years they are under the rod, yet we see so little 
 real advance. Oh ! let us watch against an infidel Christianity, 
 if I may so express myself; for there is so much infidelity in 
 our fallen nature still lingering in the renewed heart, that we 
 have reason mightily to pray against it. The believer should 
 seek to make the most of his trials. They are disguised 
 covenant blessings, and as such, in love are sent. We should 
 pray over them, and pray in them, and regard them all as 
 designed but to prepare us for an eternal glory. They are sent 
 for an especial purpose, to accomplish an especial good." 
 
 " Thus, then, it is good to see God answering our prayer, 
 although it be by sharp trials of faith. This tried faith glorifies 
 God, purifies our hearts, endears Jesus as a precious Sympa- 
 thizer in our sorrows, and fits us for His dwelling-place. We 
 may not, as I have remarked, see how God is working for us 
 in the event ; for, in the language of Job, Men see 7iot the bright 
 light lohich is in the clouds^ hut the loind passeth and deanseth 
 them^ and then the bright light is visible. I bless God again and 
 again for His most trying dispensations ; and that He has given 
 me, even such a one as me, to see Him in all things connected 
 with my present good and eternal happiness. What losers are 
 some of God's children, who watch not and see not Him in 
 every step they take through the wilderness world ! Oh ! it 
 is inexpressibly sweet to walk with God full in view ; to trace 
 Him in everything — in creation, in providence, in grace, in all 
 things on earth and in heaven. What manner of person ought 
 we to be in all holy conversation, who have thus to do with 
 God ! Keep a steady eye upon His ways, although they may 
 be at times wrapped in mystery. Watch the leadings of His 
 providence ; be careful not to go from Him ; there is the 
 danger. Follow after, and patiently wait with a watchful eye, 
 and a praying heart, and a trusting mind. His doings, seeking 
 childlike obedience to His most blessed, loving will. And 
 when the Lord thus brings our self-willed hearts into meek 
 submission, so that we are perfectly sati fied to have Him to 
 do with and by us as best pleases and glorifies Him, having 
 no choice in this or that, then it is God Avorks like Himselfj 
 educes good from evil, and brings light out of darkness." 
 " How much of needless care and anxietv does unbelief cut 
 
208 MEMOIR OF MRS. MAllY WIXSLOW. 
 
 out for the tried believer in this wilderness world ! Distrust, 
 base, ungratefid distrust, seems to follow close at my side, to 
 mar present comforts, and to dishonour Him whom, in spite of 
 all, my soul loveth. Since four o'clock this morning, the hour 
 at which I awoke, has this enemy had a hard contest with me. 
 I went to the Lord and asked for that help which only He 
 could give ; but it was not until half-an-hour ago I opened my 
 Bible, and my eye rested on the 53rd Isaiah, 4tli verse : Surely 
 He hath home our griefs and carried our sorrows. At once my 
 base ingratitude dissolved my heart into deep contrition, and 
 tears flowed down my cheeks. Did he indeed carry my 
 sorrows, wdiich I must have carried through eternity? Did 
 He bear my grief, was He striken for my transgression, for 
 which hell must have been my portion for ever ? Even for 
 this my sin of distrust did He suffer, and shall I doubt, for one 
 moment, of His wondrous love, unceasing and unchanging? 
 He was indeed the Antitype of the ram caught in the thicket, 
 and offered up in my stead, as a burnt-offering to a holy God, 
 and by His stripes my soul is healed, and healed for ever. 
 How marvellous is the display of electing love and sovereign 
 grace to such a one as me ! How do I abhor myself in dust 
 and in ashes, while I remember that, unless upheld and pre- 
 served by that same love, the very next difficulty that occurs 
 will find me as distrustful and doulDting as ever. What a God 
 is ours ! He loves to pardon and delights in mercy. And yet, 
 God forbid that we should think lightly of sin because He is 
 so good and ready to forgive !" 
 
 to her son, rev. g. e. w. , on iiis illness. 
 
 "Dearest G , 
 
 "God is love, and this has been most blessedly 
 manifested to us from first to last. He has been to us a God 
 hearing and a God answering prayer ; and yet he has not left 
 us without a Father's chastening hand. As His children. His 
 redeemed ones. He has caused us to pass under the rod, but it 
 has been in such a tender, gentle way, and so blended with 
 manifestations of love and goodness, that we have to bless 
 and praise Him for it all. lie is raising you up again, I trust, 
 {or greater usefulness, and more devotedness of heart and life. 
 It is no small matter to l^e a consistent Christian, an Israelite 
 indeed^ in whom there is no gvile. To accomplish this great 
 end, we too often need the discipline of that covenant which 
 
LETTER TO HER SON, REV. C. E. W. 209 
 
 is ordered in all things and sure — and we shall have it. How 
 often and how much do we mistake the character of God ! 
 We think He is such a one as ourselves ; but He must do all 
 Pie has declared that He will, because He is God. 7, the Lord^ 
 change not. There is no after purpose or thought with God ! 
 He sees the end from the beginning. This is a delightful sub- 
 ject for contemplation ; and if you will give it your attention, 
 restricting yourself to the study only of God's pure word, 
 comparing scripture with scripture, you will find a delightful 
 field of truth in which to roam, w^orthy the labour of a whole 
 life ; for out of it will grow many most precious and important 
 truths, on other branches of the glorious gospel of our Lord 
 and Saviour Jesus Christ. ... I should have wished to have 
 been with you, but it seems I was to stop here for a season, 
 and this was without my own planning, and therefore I know 
 it to be of the Lord. Oh how much infidelity there is in our 
 fallen nature to contend with, all our journey through. May 
 the Lord increase our faith ! Let me hear from yourself, how 
 you are and how you feel, I was grateful for your last, and 
 praise God on your belialf." 
 
 " A holy familiarity between God and His redeemed chil- 
 dren is most lovely and blessed. He feeds the lamp and keeps 
 it burning, and the soul rests quietly in the hands of the best 
 of Friends, and best of Fathers. I think tliat, in general, we 
 do but take too superficial a view of what sin is in the sight of 
 God, a holy God, and we do not sufficiently examine our 
 hearts by Plis holy law. Such a view of what sin is would 
 make us cling closer to the cross of Christ ; it would send 
 us oftener to the atoning blood for cleansing, and endear 
 to us the preciousness and worth of a throne of grace. It 
 would also keep us from being mere yea and nay Christians, 
 or half-hearted Christians, and make us more earnest for the 
 salvation of others. It would, too, enable us to form a better 
 judgment of our own case, as well as more clearly discerning 
 the case of others, A slight, imperfect knowledge of what sin 
 is, leads to almost every evil a Christian is liable to fall in, and 
 is dishonouring to God. Let us look more at what He inflicted 
 upon His beloved Son for sins not His own. Oh pray to have 
 just that insight into it as may make you cling more to Christ, 
 and fit you for increased usefulness to souls. May the Lord 
 lead you into all truth, keep your eye and heart towards Him- 
 self, moment by moment, and make you a faithful minister of 
 Jesus Christ. 
 
CHAPTER X. 
 
 Compassion for the well-being of souls is one of the most 
 holy and spontaneous impulses of our religion. In this con- 
 sists what is termed, the ' energies of Christianity.' Chris- 
 tianity is not a person, but an idea ; and the development of 
 this idea in the soul of those who believe and obey the truth, 
 inspiring all its faculties, and consecrating them to God, is the 
 power or energy of Christianity. " The expulsive power of a 
 new affection," as Dr. Chalmers beautifully expresses it, dis- 
 lodging from the heart its reigning selfishness, inspires it with the 
 feeling and sentiment of the purest benevolence, which yearns 
 to make others partake of its joy. When Andrew found the 
 Messiah, moved by the impulse of a discovery so great, he 
 went in quest of his brother Simon, and " brought him to 
 Jesus." The impassioned exclamation of the Jewish quceu, as 
 she contemplated the threatened massacre of her nation, may 
 befittingly express the intense and holy solicitude of a pious 
 heart, yearning to save the objects of its love from a more cer- 
 tain and appalling doom, " How can I endure to see the de- 
 struction of my kindred ?" And yet, while thus I write, we 
 are far from speaking of personal faithfulness on the subject of 
 religion as either a facile or a pleasant task. Nay, it is prob- 
 ably the most difficult and delicate of all Christian duties. 
 To conquer an instinctive feeling of delicacy and reserve; to 
 assume an appearance of superior sanctity ; to chill, perhaps, 
 affection ; forfeit friendship ; and to rouse a feeling, if not of 
 hostility, yet of dislike, and yet be faithful^ demands no ordi- 
 nary grace. 
 
 AVe have already spoken of her passion for souls. Never 
 was the subject absent from her mind ; it entwined itself with 
 all her thoughts, engrafted itself on all her actions, breathed in 
 all her praj'ers. Her views of eternity were so realizing, her 
 conviction of the truth of the gospel was so strong, and her 
 [210] 
 
HER PASSION FOR SOULS. 211 
 
 sense of the preciousness of the Saviour was so great, that the 
 interests of the soul rose before her eye with a magnitude so 
 vast, and a solemnity so overpowering, as to lessen the com- 
 parative importance of every other object. No one crossed 
 her path, and her pen traced no lines, without a word that spoke 
 of a world to come. With singular appropriateness might she 
 have embodied her deep and holy passion in the expressive 
 language of the poet : — 
 
 '' For me, when I forget the darling theme, 
 Be my tongue mute, my fiincy paint no more, 
 And, dead to joy, forget this heart to beat." 
 
 In illustrating the importance of a direct appeal to individ- 
 uals on the subject of personal religion she would frequent- 
 ly quote a touching incident, related to her when at Cam- 
 bridge, of the late excellent Rev, Charles Simeon. On one 
 occasion he was summoned to the dying-bed of a brother. 
 Entering the room, his relative extended his hand to him, and 
 with deep emotion said, " I am dying, and you never warned 
 me of the state I was in, and of the danger to which I was ex 
 posed from neglecting the salvation of my soul !" " Nay, 
 my brother," replied Mr. Simeon, "I took every reasonable 
 opportunity of bringing the subject of religion before your 
 mind, and frequently alluded to it in my letters." " Yes," ex- 
 claimed the dying man, " you did ; but that was not enough. 
 You never came to me, closed the door, and took me by the 
 collar of my coat, and told me that I was unconverted, and 
 that, if I died in that state, I should be lost. And now I am 
 dying, and, but for God's grace, I might have been for ever 
 undone !" It is said that this affecting scene made an inefface- 
 able impression on Mr. Simeon's mind. To this startling fact 
 she w^ould add another, scarcely less affecting, authenticated 
 by the gentleman to whom it referred. A distinguished Amer- 
 ican clergyman was especially and deeply concerned for the 
 conversion of a member of his congregation who, from his 
 great wealth and moral worth, occupied a position in society 
 of considerable importance. He had' for years attended the 
 faithful ministrations of the pastor, but as yet gave no evidence 
 of a change of heart. Regular in his attendance at the sanc- 
 tuary, fascinated with the eloquence of the preacher, and gene- 
 rous in his expression of admiration, he yet remained immersed 
 in the world and without the pale of the church. His minister 
 
212 MEMOIR OF MRS. MAIIY V\'INSLO\V. 
 
 yearned for liis conversion. Calling upon him early one morn- 
 ing, he requested a private interview. He at once disclosed 
 his mission. In a conversation, brief but pointed, earnest but 
 affectionate, personal but courteous, he pressed upon his friend's 
 serious attention the immediate consideration of his soul, the 
 claims of eternity, and the duty of immediate submission to 
 God. The solenm appeal was listened to with kindly respect, 
 but with the brief, emphatic reply, " I have no time for these 
 things." "Not time!" exclaimed the beseeching, faithful 
 minister, "then, sir, you must y???f? time!" With these brief 
 but thrilling w^ords, uttered with the profoundest solemnity, he 
 left him. The merchant repaired to his counting-house, and 
 was soon immersed in the world. In vain, however, he strove 
 to give his thoughts to business ; the words, " You must find 
 time," still vibrated on his ear, and excluded every other 
 thought from his mind. Quitting the scene of his gains, he 
 returned to his home, bowed down under the conviction of his 
 lost condition as a sinner. The Spirit of God was now mov- 
 ing, as of old, upon the dark, disordered elements of the soul, 
 and soon a new creation Avas to spring forth — holy, beautiful, 
 and deathless. In a few days the object of this holy solicitude 
 and personal appeal became a new creature in Christ Jesus, 
 and afterwards a distinguished and useful member of His 
 church. 
 
 Such was the tender fliithfulness to souls she was wont to 
 urge upon all Christians, and which she herself so beautifully 
 exemplified. AjjjjUcatio?! of gospel truth in the pulpit, and 
 direct personal appeal out of it, were points upon which she 
 would insist with an earnestness and solemnity of manner 
 peculiarly her own. It was no slight evidence of the sincer- 
 ity and depth of her holy sympathies, that she shrunk not 
 from the task of addressing, on all the momentous subjects of 
 religion, individuals occupying high places of responsibility in 
 the land. She was frequently, and with tears, heard impas- 
 sionately to exclaim, " Oh, who will warn — who will entreat 
 them ? " Copies of letters thus addressed, w^ere found among 
 her papers, one or two of wdiicli may be given, as illustrating 
 this noble feature of her Christian character. 
 
 "to the duke of . 
 
 " Understanding that your Grace knew Colonel Mackinnon, 
 of the Coldstream Guards, and having heard that he died a 
 
LETTERS TO THE DUKE OF . 213 
 
 believer in the Lord Jesus — a truly converted and holy man 
 — I have taken the liberty of sending you a copy of a small 
 book of prayers, composed by himself, and expressing, as I 
 trust, the true breathings of his heart. A few friends of his, 
 I have understood, finding them among his manuscript papers, 
 published them after his death. I sliould hope, however, 
 that at a later period of his life, clearer light was vouchsafed 
 him, as from one of the prayers, which I shall mark, it is evi- 
 dent he then had not. I presume that as you knew him when 
 a young, gay, thoughtless man of the world, his conversion 
 will not be entirely without interest to you. In the prayer to 
 w^hich I have referred, it is evident that he is mixing up his 
 repentance and reformation, in some degree, with the atoning, 
 finished work of the Saviour. Now it is clear from the gos- 
 pel of Christ, that he could not be saved by any work done in 
 him, nor for any work of merit done by him. God pardons, 
 justifies, and saves poor sinners for Christ's sake alone. It is 
 Christ's obedience and death which honours the law of God, 
 and which satisfies divine justice on our behalf The Holy 
 Spirit works repentance, faith, and every other Christian grace 
 in the believer, as a fruit and consequence of his free justifica- 
 tion, not to justify him, or to fit him for being justified. As a 
 believer he is already justified by the Atonement made on his 
 behalf by the Lord Jesus. We are saved as sinners, not as 
 saints ; and if we come to Christ lost and undone in ourselves, 
 having nothing to commend us to His notice, or to propitiate 
 His favour, and seek this great mercy with our whole heart, 
 we shall surely find Him, and He will manifest Himself unto us 
 as He does not unto the world. The Lord grant that you may 
 have this precious blessing before you go hence. It is a peril- 
 ous and an awful thing to be satisfied with a form of godhness 
 without the vital, saving power. Except a man^ says Christ, 
 he horn again,, he cannot see the kingdom of heaven. Eternity 
 and an immortal soul, surely, are solemn realities, and not to 
 be sported with. God, w4th whom we have to do, is holy as 
 well as merciful, and righteous as v^^ell as gracious. Justice 
 must be satisfied, and holiness must be honoured, ere mercy can 
 reach the sinner. Jesus Christ is alone able to save you from 
 eternal ruin ; and if you have not sought Him with the whole 
 heart, I would most affectionately and earnestly implore your 
 Grace to lose not a moment in this all-momentous work. The 
 mistakes of time cannot be rectified in eternity. You cannot 
 
214 MEMOIR OF MRS. MiRY WINSLOW. 
 
 return to make good the errors of the present. It is, there- 
 fore, of infinite moment, that you should be sure that you are 
 building your hope of heaven upon the one, only foundation, 
 which is, Christ Jesus. Believe in the Lord Jesus Christ, and 
 thou shalt he saved. I do not thus address you because I think 
 you are a greater sinner than myself, or than thousands who 
 are basing their acceptance with God upon unscriptural and 
 fatal grounds ; but because the Lord has laid you much upon 
 my mind ; and situated as you are — encircled by the pomp 
 and gilded vanities of this poor, dying world — it was not likely 
 that the truth, the precious truth, would reach your ear. I 
 pray God that you may be faithful to your own soul, and be 
 led to examine yourself, and ascertain if you are prepared to 
 stand at the bar of God. He may summon you at any moment 
 — at midnight the cry may come, 'Prepare to meet thy God !' 
 Come to Jesus then, just as you are. He will receive, and 
 Avelcome, and save you, for He will in nowise cast out any 
 who come to Him. Come as a poor, bankrupt sinner ; come 
 empty and self-loathing ; come with a life of sin, and rebellion, 
 and folly : only come to Jesus, and He will be gracious and 
 and save you, luithout money and without price. This is from 
 one who wishes to meet you at the right hand of Christ. 
 
 "to lokd , on his illness. 
 
 "My Lord, — 
 
 " I have heard with regret that you are ill, seriously ill, and 
 likely soon to stand before God. Permit me, with unfeigned 
 respect and sincere sympathy, to approach you with the ques- 
 tion. Are you ready ? Are you prepared for the solemn change 
 that awaits you? Eternity, with its dread realities, is before 
 you, and you have a soul to be saved or lost for ever ! What, 
 at the present moment, can be of such importance to you as a 
 correct knowledge of your real condition as a sinner in the 
 sight of a holy God, who searcheth the heart? You must be 
 sensible that you have hitherto lived in neglect of your soul, 
 in forgetfulness of God, and in oblivion of eternity. The 
 world with all its pomps and gaieties, its interests and honours, 
 has had complete control of your mind, and full possession of 
 your heart. You have lived ivithout God and without hope in 
 the world. That you may have observed the forms of godli- 
 ness I admit, but God will not be mocked with a mere exter- 
 
LETTER TO LORD . 215 
 
 v.rI vrork ; He has to do with the heart. Plis language is, My 
 .<?o;7, give me thy heart. And now, my lord, you are about to 
 appear in the presence of this holy Lord God, who is just to 
 Himself, while He is most merciful to the sinner. Most ear- 
 n vastly and respectfully do I urge upon you the immediate con- 
 sideration of the things that make for your eternal peace. 
 Trifle not with your endangered and immortal soul. Even 
 now, at the eleventh hour, you may find mercy. The fatal 
 error in your present state may be a false security, or a reli- 
 ance upon the mere mercy of God's character, not knowing 
 that if He does not accept you in the righteousness of Christ, 
 He is to you, and will be to all eternity, a consuming fire. 
 Flee to the Saviour now as a lost, self-ruined, and helpless sin- 
 ner. Listen to His own most gracious and encouraging word, 
 God so loved the luorld, that He gave His only-hegotten Son^ 
 that luhosoever helievcth in Him should not perish^ hut have ever- 
 lasting life. Do not reply, 'I do believe,' if your belief is but 
 the bare assent of the understanding to the truth of the gos- 
 pel. With the iii:art man helieveth unto righteousness. If, 
 with the penitent jailer, you truly believe in the Lord Jesus 
 Christ, if your faith is a simple coming to Jesus, as a lost, un- 
 done sinner, receiving Him with your whole heart, you will 
 experience a joy, and peace, and hope, which nothing in this 
 poor world could ever give or take away. Cease not to 
 wrestle with Him in prayer until He bless you. Yield your 
 heart, if now a conviction of guilt burdens it, if now a sense 
 of sorrow saddens it, to the gracious invitation of the Saviour, 
 Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will 
 give you rest. Seek that rest nowhere else but in Christ. The 
 heart of Jesus overflows with love to sinners. It was to save 
 sinners He condescended to hve, and consented to die. He 
 came to seek and to save that luhich teas lost. Those who seek 
 Him with the whole heart shall certainly find Him, Oh, lose no 
 time ! Ever}^ moment is of more value to you now than ten 
 thousand worlds. Close your door, and exclude every object 
 uom 3'our mind l)ut Clirist. Be importunate, and give Him 
 no rest imtil you yourself find rest in His atoning work, and 
 the Holy Ghost, in the riches of His mercy, applies to your 
 conscience that precious blood of Christ that can alone impart 
 peace to a poor, guilty, condemned sinner. Banish from your 
 mind the notion of making your peace with God. It is only 
 the Lord Jesus who can make our peace, by becoming, as Ho 
 
216 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 has done, a peace-oflfering to God for us. To Him, then, flee, 
 who saves to the uttermost all who come unto God hy HimP 
 
 to the archbishop of , on baptismal regeneration. 
 
 " My Lord Archbishop, — 
 
 " Observing, by the papers, that the case of Mr. G is 
 
 soon to come before you for adjudication, I presume to address 
 you on the subject. It is as a fellow-behever in the Lord 
 Jesus that I take this hberty, feehng that the question, that is 
 to pass under your consideration, is closely connected with the 
 glory of God and the honour of our Redeemer. Eternity is 
 before us, and at the tribunal of God you and I will soon 
 stand, pardoned, I humbly trust, by the blood and justified by 
 the righteousness of Christ. It is with a close realization of 
 this solemn fact I now write. The doctrine of Baptismal 
 Regeneration, — a doctrine which, by those who hold it, is 
 made to take the place of the renewing, quickening power of 
 the Holy Ghost — is a dogma not found in the Word of God. 
 That it may be taught in the writings of men I admit — and it 
 is appalling to reflect how many souls, deluded and ensnared 
 by this error, have gone to their account ' with a lie in their 
 right hand,' cauglit in this net of Satan — but it has no place 
 in the Bible. The Word of God is the Christian's sole rule 
 of faith. It is from this word we are to draw the truths we 
 believe — by this word we are to order our steps — and by this 
 word we shall be judged in the last day. ' To the law and 
 to the testimony.' A most solemn admonition meets us at the 
 close of this sacred record. If any man shall add unto these 
 things^ God shall add unto him the plagues that are written in 
 this hook. Thus jealously has God guarded the purity of His 
 holy word. He has spoken it, and I believe it. Baptismal 
 Regeneration has been added by the dictum and teaching of 
 men as a doctrine to be believed. For this He has a contro- 
 versy with His church. I believe that He is sifting her, and 
 is showing, by the existence and spread of Puseyism, the 
 great iniquity of those who have engrafted, and would engraft, 
 upon the revealed word an error so fatal to souls, and so dis 
 honouring to the work of the Holy Spirit. I do most respect 
 fully and earnestly implore you to ponder well your position. 
 Seek counsel from the Most High. May He enable you to 
 set aside the world's opinion, and to act with your eye fixed 
 
LETTER TO THE ARCHBISHOP OP . 217 
 
 upon tlie great white throne anrl in view of an endless eter- 
 nity. How many have passed into the eternal world fatally 
 deceived by this error ! Baptized in infancy, they were taught 
 to view themselves as spiritually regenerated, as made the 
 children of God; and they died, it is to be feared, with no 
 more light and no more grace, believing they were safe. Ter- 
 rible delusion ! I beseech you to enter your solemn and de- 
 cided protest against this insidious and spreading error. Who 
 can tell but that God has placed you in your present eminent 
 position, in order to deal a death-blow at this unscriptural and 
 fatal dogma. "When the Jewish nation was to be massacred, 
 Mordecai said to the queen : If thou altogether holdest thy peace 
 at this time, then shall there enlargement and deliverance arise to 
 the Jews from another quarter. . . . And who knoiveth 
 whether thou art come to the kingdom for such a time as this ? 
 May the Lord God impart to your grace all wisdom, prudence, 
 and faithfulness to do His will in this, and in all things con- 
 nected with His glory. Soon will He come whose right it is 
 to reign ! All the devices of Satan, and all false doctrine, and 
 erroneous teaching of men, will then vanish before Him. Oh, 
 let us meet our God wnth unspotted hands ! Cleansed by the 
 blood of atonement, and sanctified by the indwelling Spirit, 
 we shall stand complete, not having spot or wrinkle or any such 
 thing. Regard me as one who prayerfully desires to see you, 
 in your present position of responsibility and influence, act 
 boldly for God, for His truth, and for His one church, so that 
 His dear and blessed name be not dishonoured. 
 
 TO A G , ESQ., OF NEW YORK. 
 
 " Dear Friend,— May 3, 1848. 
 
 " I was much grieved to hear that your dear mother 
 was no more. I believe she loved the Lord Jesus, and that 
 she is now with Him who loved her, and washed her from her 
 sins in His own most precious blood, I cannot forget her. 
 Very dear was she to me. Many hours of happy inter 
 course we have had together ; and the sincere, disinterested 
 affection manifested towards me and mine has never been 
 forgotten. I never cease to love, or can forget old friends. 
 And oh, what a joy it is to know that, although she is gone 
 from earth, I shall see her again, and enjoy a far more delight- 
 ful intercourse with her above than ever I did below. God 
 be praised for this good hot)e through grace. This^ my dear 
 10 
 
218 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 Mr. G , was jour denr mother's hope, and it is mine, and 
 
 oh, may it be yours! Time is i^hort, and eternity, with all its 
 solemn realities, is before us. Oh, let me urge upon you to 
 give your mind, your heart, your every |'(nver, to seek earn- 
 estly and perseveringly an interest in tlic Saviour of sinners ! 
 What can the world do for you at a dying hour ? What could 
 the wealth of ten thousand worlds avail you when you stand 
 before the judgment-seat of Christ ? When I last saw or 
 heard of you, you were an unconverted man. But how is it 
 with you now ? Do you love Jesus, the sinner's Friend ? 
 Are you reconciled to God ? Do you know Christ for your- 
 self? Sincerely do I trust that God will answer your precious 
 mother's ten thousand prayers, offered up for you, her only 
 child and her beloved son. You were everything on earth to 
 her. May you meet her in heaven ! Shall I tell her when I 
 meet her there (for soon my time will come), that you are on 
 your way to glory ? Write and tell me what are your views 
 on the all-important subject of religion, and what are your 
 hopes for eternity. Oh, flee to Jesus ! He requires no work 
 from you in order to purchase salvation. It is His own free 
 gift of everlasting and unchanging love. Go to Him, then, as 
 you are ; He will open His arms to embrace you, more glad 
 to receive you than you are to come. He came into the 
 world to save sinners — poor, helpless, lost sinners — sinners that 
 could do nothing to save themselves. To them he says. Look 
 unto m,e, and he ye saved. Him that cometh unto me, I will in 
 nowise cast out. I will not weary you, but will conclude, only 
 expressing the hope that you will let me hear whether you 
 have been brought to sit at the feet of the Son of God, that I 
 may carry the news to your dear mother, whom ere long I 
 hope to see, when we shall know even as we are known, and 
 when all tears will be wiped from our eyes for ever. Believe 
 me, heaven is worth living for, and worth dying for. It is all 
 true. Heaven is true, and Christ is true, and God is true, and 
 His word is true. May He bless you, dear friend, and save 
 your never-dying soul. 
 
 TO E T c , ESQ. 
 
 "Dear C , June 3, 1848. 
 
 "Poor Mr. is dead! Have you heard of it. 
 
 If so, what was the state of his mind ? Write and tell me. 
 His poor wife, bow I feel for her ! Is not this a solemn call to 
 
corhespondencb. 219 
 
 us all ? "What is our life ? How uncertain ! and yet is it not 
 awfully true that poor wretched man rushes heedlessly on, 
 thoughtless of what awaits him in an endless eternity ? Oh, 
 that we who profess to have our eyes open — we who profess 
 to know the way, the truth, and the life — did but so let our 
 light shine around us, that others might be led to seek the 
 same mighty blessings that await all who value their own 
 souls ! Dear friend, this is a solemn warning to you and to 
 
 me. Poor is gone ! and we are travelling fast through 
 
 this wilderness world, and soon shall pass away too. Let us, 
 then, feel more like pilgrims and strangers here. Let us not 
 seek our rest where our precious Jesus had no place to lay His 
 head. Let us rejoice more in the prospect of that glorious in- 
 heritance prepared for us above, where He is who hath loved 
 us unto the death. Oh, for ten thousand world would I not 
 have my portion here ! But I only intended when I took my 
 
 pen to inquire of you any particulars of poor 's state of 
 
 mind before he departed. He was your friend, I presume, or 
 what the Avorld calls a friend. Will you not go and see his 
 poor wife ? Be, in the best sense, the good Samaritan to her 
 now. Visit her in her sorrow, and lead her mind to Jesus, 
 the Friend of the friendless. Such has He been to me and 
 mine, and as such I can commend Him to all. Oh, that all 
 did but know Him, then all must and would love Him ! My 
 love to your wife. I wish I knew her better. 
 
 TO I W , ESQ., BOSTON, U. S., ON THE ATONEMENT. 
 
 "Dear Friend, — London, June 6, 1848. 
 
 "Although I have not written to you for some time, 
 yet you have been much in my thoughts, and I determined, in 
 the strength of the Lord, to address you once more, and, per- 
 haps, for the last time on this side of eternity. You and I are 
 hastening fast through time. At the longest period of our ex- 
 istence it is but short. But, oh, our spiritual existence! where 
 and when will it end ? Never, never ! It is a solemn and 
 awful truth, yet to the Christian dehghtful. As long as the 
 existence of God Himself, so will be ours. Because I live 
 (says Christ), ye shall live also. It is a blessed thought that 
 the Triune God — the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost — are all 
 engaged in the salvation of a poor sinner. The Father so 
 loved the world as to give His only-begotten Son. The Son, 
 
220 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 Jesus Christ, came into the world to save sinners. And it was 
 through the Eternal Spirit He offered himself without spot 
 unto God. Tlie whole seventh chapter of Hebrews is full of 
 the precious Atonement made by Christ for the redemption 
 of the soul. Without the shedding of blood there can be no re- 
 mission. I could wish, if possible, to be much in earnest on 
 this subject ; as it is here, my dear friend, I fear that we differ. 
 If I am not saved by the Atonement made on Calvary, I am 
 yet in my sins, and am unsaved. To be sound in the doctrine 
 is needful (as you justly observe), for who can build a hope of 
 heaven on any other foundation than that which is laid, Jesus 
 Christ himself, the chief corner-stone ? This one foundation is — 
 God manifest in the flesh — offered and making a full and suffi- 
 cient atonement for the sins of His people, laid to His account 
 by the hands of Eternal Justice. He ivas made sin for us, 
 who knew no sin, that we might be made the righteousness of 
 God in Him. Without the Divine Atonement, I repeat, 
 I am lost for ever. No mere creature could atone for the 
 sins of millions of the human race. It was the Divinity of 
 Christ that made efficacious all that he did and suffered. 
 His resurrection was a receipt from Divine Justice that 
 ample satisfaction had been given for the broken law of a 
 holy God. All our righteousness is but as filthy rags, and 
 how can we commend ourselves to God but as we stand 
 in a better righteousness than our own? I feel my journey 
 drawing to its close, and if I had to put my finger upon one 
 single good action that I have ever done during my life that 
 was not tainted and defiled by sin, as a term of my salvation, 
 I should be eternally separated from God, Sin is mixed 
 with every thought, and nothing but the blood of Jesus Christ 
 can cleanse us from its defilement. If Christ is (not the power 
 of God) not God Himself — God in our nature — He could not 
 have atoned for one single soul of Adam's race. On this doc- 
 trine of the Atonement hangs our everlasting happiness. Our 
 eternal all is at stake. Oh, let us never forget that Jesus 
 Christ came into the world to save sinners ! My only hope is 
 in this ; and I believe I shall be saved through the vicarious 
 sacrifice made on the cross, when he exclaimed. It is finished. 
 The Holy Ghost, too, the Third Person in the glorious Trinity, 
 performs His part in this great work, in applying the atoning 
 blood to the conscience, renewing, sanctifying, and taking pos- 
 session of the soul here, and fitting it for the full enjoyment of 
 
UNION WITfl CHRIST. 221 
 
 the glory that awaits it hereafter. May the Lord the Spirit 
 open our eye to see, and our heart to receive the truth as it 
 is in Jesus. Love to all your circle. 
 
 TO J. T , ESQ., ox REALIZING OUR ONENESS WITH CHRIST. 
 
 "Dear Christian Friend, — May 30th, 1848. 
 
 " I have just received yours, and hasten to answer 
 it. I am never Letter prepared to reply to a letter than when 
 I first receive it. The memory is treacherous, and at 74 (this 
 is, I suppose, the case with all dying mortals) particularly so. 
 But I am wrong ; the believer in Christ is, in a sense, immor- 
 tal. For although the body dies, it only sleeps in Jesus, and 
 shall be raised again at the last day. Three times in one chap- 
 ter Jesus says, / ivill raise it up again at the last day. Here is 
 comfort for you and me. Is Jesus increasingly precious to 
 you ? I gather from your letter that He is so. Bless Him for 
 it. He is faithful to all His exceeding great and precious prom- 
 ises, and by them we are made partakers of the divine 
 nature. Keep hold of your oneness with Christ. If we lose 
 sight of that blessed truth, we are at sea in a moment. I in 
 you and you in me. Think, then, that Jesus and you are one ; 
 one in time, and one in eternity ; never separated, and insepara- 
 ble. Oh, how this precious truth should be ever present with 
 us on all occasions, at home and abroad, in public and in pri- 
 vate, living or dying ! Dear brother, go on to know more of 
 the power of the resurrection of Christ in your soul, that you 
 may thereby glorify Him who is your life, and that you may 
 be more abundantly useful in His service. I am glad to hear 
 that you have been able to do good in the name of your belov- 
 ed Lord. Time is short — life is uncertain. Let us, then, em- 
 ploy the talent God has given us, that we may have more abun- 
 dantly. Each behever has his or her gift, whatever that 
 gift may be ; and Christ says. Occupy until I come. Let us 
 not bury our talent in earthly things, for these pass away, and 
 we shall live for ever. We are on a journey the most event- 
 ful that ever an immortal undertook. We must press forward. 
 There is no standing still in this journey. We are to follow 
 on to know the Lord ; to grow in grace. You have already 
 travelled some stages in this heavenly road since I saw you ; 
 but there is much of the good land yet to be possessed. We 
 are to go forward to know more of Christ and of our election 
 
222 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW, 
 
 of God ; so shall we be happy in our souls and established in 
 the truth. I am often grieved in meeting some, professing 
 godliness, who seem to be standing still in the same place for 
 years, and know no more of God than at the first. . . Let 
 us, then, live near to Christ, and go oftener to Him. I find, 
 from long experience, that confession of sin is one of the most 
 healthful exercises of the renewed soul — constant and imme- 
 diate confession. If toe confess our sins, He is faithful and just 
 to forgive us our sins. If I feel a corruption in my heart, dis- 
 honouring as it must be to God, what am I to do ? If I sit 
 down to reason it away, I might as well attempt to create a 
 world. Then what am I to do ? Take it at once to Jesus ; 
 tell Him all about it ; and the faith that carried it to Jesus will 
 overcome it in His name. Precious faith, with which we are 
 to fight all our battles, and overcome in the name of Jehovah- 
 Jesus. Oh, what mighty privileges has the follower of the 
 Saviour ! We learn to deal unceasingly with God, and God 
 deals unweariedly with us. Let us aim in all things to glorify 
 Him, for in a little while. He that shall come will come, and will 
 not tarry. Let us keep a purified conscience by constant con- 
 fession. "We need not always retire to do this. In the street, 
 in company, or anywhere, we can lift up our heart to Him ; 
 and a thought, a sigh can reach His heart, and He can mani- 
 fest His forgiving love. I think, if there is a verdant spot in 
 this wilderness world, it is where a poor believing sinner, with 
 a contrite broken heart, sits at the feet of Jesus. The sinner 
 confessing — Jesus pardoning — the blood applied, and the con- 
 science cleansed — all guilt removed, and the redeemed of the 
 Lord rising from his knees, rejoicing in the Lord his God. 
 Such have I often experienced, and therefore I commend it to 
 all who are followers of the Lamb. We have had trials of 
 sickness ; but the Lord often tries the faith of His saints, that 
 they may try His faithfulness in the fulfilment of His promise. 
 He is ever with them in all their troubles, and in all their con- 
 cerns He is equally concerned. When we depart from Him 
 He chastens, but does not lose sight of us, no, not for an in- 
 stant. His glory is closely connected with all Ave say and all 
 we do. Know ye not that your bodies are the tetnj^les of the 
 Holy Ghost ? Oh, how should this keep us watchful, lest we 
 grieve this blessed Inmate ! The Lord bless you and increase 
 you in all spiritual knowledge, prays yours in a most precious 
 Jesus." 
 
LETTER TO HER SOX. 223 
 
 It is a lesson which the church of Christ, in "these last 
 days," has been practically learning, that the broadest spirit of 
 Christian charity may exist in connexion with the most inflexi- 
 ble fidelity to Christian truth. A union that demands, as a 
 holocaust upon its altar, the right of private judgment, freedom 
 of conscience, and the privilege of ' speaking the truth in love,' 
 is w^anting in all the essential elements of a true and holy 
 union. No individual ever maintained more strenuously the 
 unity of the church of God, and at the same time bowed with 
 profounder reverence to the supreme Headship and authority of 
 Christ, than the subject of our memoir. To those who knew 
 her but partially, she might have appeared, at times, exclusive 
 in her views, and stern in her spirit. But to those who knew 
 her long and well, that exclusiveness was but an uncompro- 
 mising attachment to God's word, and that sternness but the 
 intensity of her love to souls. As illustrating these happy fea- 
 tures of a truly catholic Christian, we quote from her letters 
 and journal : — 
 
 TO HER SON, REV. I. D. W . 
 
 "I have just had a sweet visit from my own dear pastor Mr. 
 Evans. How full of Christ is the heart of this dear man of 
 God ! Oh, that we were all more like him, or rather more like 
 Christ. . . . Where I see the love of Christ most prevail 
 in the heart, there I see love to the saints. Love ye one another, 
 even as I have loved you. Blessed be God there are no sepa- 
 rating walls in heaven ; and of this be assured, wherever you 
 meet with one who bears much of the image of Christ, you 
 will find no bigotry or exclusiveness, but a prevailing love to 
 all who are conformed to the same image. Let us beware of 
 a spirit of sectarianism and exclusiveness, for sure I am, God 
 is displeased with it, and will show His displeasure in due time. 
 Let us live above all unholy, unrighteous feelings, and have 
 little to do with those who hold them, for evil communications 
 corrupt good manners. God is love. Heaven is one ocean of 
 love, and believers are commanded to love one another, even 
 as Christ hath loved them. The Spirit does not love to dwell 
 where love is not the prevailing feeling. In fact where the 
 Spirit is, there will be love ; and the manifest want of this 
 grace in any, is a proof that the Spirit of Christ is not in them." 
 
224 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 TO ANOTHER OF HER SONS. 
 
 " If God will, I shall come to-morrow, and remain over the 
 Lord's-day. May the Lord direct all my step?, and all my 
 doings, and hedge up my way where I would go wro]ig. I 
 shall see you, please God, soon after you receive this. 1 long 
 to hear more about the sailing of that precious ship called the 
 ' Evangelical Alliance.' I was fearful of a wreck on the 
 slavery question. May the Lord, the Pilot, conduct her safe- 
 ly through all the dangers of her boisterous voyage. His ban- 
 ner over her is Love ; and her freight is composed of precious 
 gold, and jewels of the first water." 
 
 On a subsequent occasion she again alludes to this sub- 
 ject:— 
 
 " I rose early, and after a hurried breakfast, prepared to go 
 to Exeter Hall, to the Meeting of the Evangelical Alliance. 
 The place was filled, many standing. The meeting was not 
 of that animated character that was exhibited at the first gath- 
 ering at Liverpool ; but still it was truly gratifying to see so 
 many happy faces assembled together, to join heart to heart to 
 aid in this alliance of Christian love and fellowship. The first 
 speaker said a few words which, to me, were anything but en- 
 couraging. He remarked that we were not to expect much, 
 or look for any great results at present, &c. I could hardly 
 sit patiently, and listen to his unbelieving speech. We are to 
 ask for, and expect great things, from a great God. Dr. Lief- 
 child followed, and spoke well. Then Mr. Bickersteth, who 
 also spoke much to the purpose. And then a hymn, and a 
 long, a very long prayer, from a vicar. A Wesleyan minister 
 followed, and after him Mr. Baptist Noel rose, and spoke with 
 great energy, earnestness, and a clear head, but without ex- 
 citement, for above an hour, and miich to our satisfaction. 
 Others were to speak, but, it being late, we were obliged to 
 leave. There was, in my judgment, a deficiency. There 
 needed more of the humble acknowledgment of sin, — the sin 
 of disunion, want of love, &c., — and looking to the Holy Spirit 
 for help, which always indicates the Divine presence. Tliere 
 was this great lack. Nevertheless, it was cheering and pleas- 
 ant to witness the union." 
 
 FROM HER DIARY. 
 
 " The love of Christ in the heart of the believer, is the 
 cement that unites the church together as one body — Christ 
 
LETTER TO A MINISTER. 225 
 
 the Head. The Spirit of Christ in me recognises and acknowl- 
 edges His own hkeness in another, and goes out to that Chris- 
 tian in holy love. This is the sweetest of all Christian fellow- 
 ship. It is thus the Lord is preparing His church on earth for 
 the blessed place He has gone to prepare for it in heaven. He 
 is spiritually educating and training her for her glorious in- 
 heritance above. It is ready, and the invitation from the lips 
 of Jesus will soon be heard, Enter into the joy of thy Lord. 
 And oh, the unspeakable happiness and joy of the redeemed 
 and glorified family ! With a calling so heavenly, and with a 
 hope so glorious, what manner of persons ought we to be in 
 all manner of holy conversation and godliness?" 
 
 " Then let the rude tempest assail, 
 The blasts of adversity blow, 
 The haven, thoup^h distant, I hail, 
 Beyond this rough ocean of woe. 
 When safe on the beautiful strand, 
 I'll smile at the billows that foam, 
 Kind angels to hail me to land, 
 And Jesus to welcome me home."* 
 
 TO A MINISTER ON THE ANTI-STATE-CHURCH MOVEMENT. 
 
 " On reading your excellent remarks on the Anti-state- 
 Church Association, I felt a union with your conciliatory spirit, 
 and a sympathy with your views. With you, I think, as I did 
 indeed from the first, that the movement was inexpedient and 
 unwise. No one upon earth, calling himself a Christian, and in 
 reality one, could more earnestly desire than myself, the sev- 
 erance of the Church of Christ from the world ; and no one 
 could more deeply deplore, or sincerely mourn over, such an 
 alliance, than I. The Church of Christ upheld by the world, 
 is contrary to Christ's express word, — Ye are not of the ivorld, 
 even as I am not of the luorld. My kingdom is not of this world. 
 He who is the Head and Husband of the Church, surely is 
 able to sustain and guide it through the wilderness, and con- 
 duct it at last to glory. It is not the puny arm of man that 
 can accomplish this great work. From the moment that I saw 
 the serpent head of Popery, under the disguise of Puseyism, 
 rear itself in Oxford, from that moment I felt that God Him- 
 self was about to accomplish a great work, and by this very 
 thing at which all were alarmed and which all deplored. 
 
 * Miss Taylor. 
 10* 
 
226 MEMOm OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 What is impossible with man is possible with Him. And 
 when I saw, and firmly believed, that God was beginning to 
 purify His one church, and with His fan thoroughly to sift His 
 floor, separating the precious from the vile, I did deplore such 
 an organization ; and wondered that its promoters did not so 
 discern ' the signs of the times' as to see God's own hand work- 
 ing. It appeared to me like Uzzah's attempt to steady the 
 ark. And though I feared not like sad consequences as befel 
 him, still the attempt seemed to me as unnecessary and feeble. 
 I fear it has done no real good, and has but resulted in widen- 
 ing the separation already too much existing between the truly 
 spiritual of God's people within the Establishment and those 
 without its pale. At the same time I do call in question the 
 motives of those who have embarked in the movement." 
 
 TO MISS M. C , ON HER BAPTISM. 
 
 ''Taplow, Lord's-day. 
 "I do rejoice to hear that the Lord is evidently in your 
 midst, and with you, my young sister, in a particular manner, 
 who has led you to acknowledge Him before a gainsaying 
 world, and His church here below. Not that you are one bit 
 more safe, or more in Christ than you were before your bap- 
 tism ; but you have showed your love to Him in obeying His 
 sweet command, and casting away all confidence in what you 
 once thought would do quite as well. You have now openly 
 put on Christ — huried loith Him in haj^tism^ ivliei'ein you are 
 risen luith Him through the faith of the operation of God, who 
 hath raised Him from the dead. So, beloved one, I trust, as 
 in a figure, you were baptized in the likeness of His death, and 
 your death, too, to the world, and the flesh, so you will be 
 helped to go on your way rejoicing in Christ Jesus. Precious 
 Jesus ! how sweet to walk with Thee, taking up every cross 
 we meet in the way. Thy love making it light and pleasant. 
 Oh, to have faith simply to follow the Lord w^herever he sees 
 fit to lead us ; to live for eternity, manifesting that we are not 
 of the world, even as He w^as not of the world. So let us 
 walk as He walked, taking His word only as our guide and 
 directory ; and I am persuaded, that if we go to Jesus and in- 
 quire of Him only. He will make our path plain before us, yea, 
 and will travel every step of that way with us, too. We shall 
 walk in God's company when Jesus is with us, and we walk 
 with Him. . . . While T do wish to enforce upon all believers 
 
LETTER TO THE KOX. AXD REV. B. W. N. 227 
 
 the great duty of obeying Jesus in all He commands, I do not 
 wish to attach any undue weight to this sweet and most ex- 
 pressive ordinance. And yet I do think it is the duty of every 
 believer to follow Christ, to walk as He walked; and in so 
 doing, I believe it will add much to his comfort, consolation, 
 and advance in the divine life. May the Lord lead us all safe- 
 ly and uprightly in the way, and the glory shall be to His 
 holy name for ever and ever. 
 
 TO THE HON. AND REV. B, W. N , ON UNITY OF JUDGMENT 
 
 IN THE CHURCH OF CHRIST. 
 
 ". . . . I am informed that you are writing a work on the 
 church. . . . How important to remember that we are Christ's 
 servants ; that He hath given us all needful direction, and left 
 us not to our own wisdom in any one thing connected with 
 His glory, and the spiritual welfare of His one church. How 
 necessary that in His church there should be unity of judgment 
 in what He has taught and enjoined. The exhortation is. Be 
 of one mind. I beseech you^ hrethren, by the name of our Lord 
 Jesus Christy that ye all speak the same thing^ and that there he 
 no divisions among you ; but that ye be j^f^'ffsctly joined together 
 in the same mind and in the same judgment^ 1 Cor. i. 10. . . . 
 Dear brother in Jesus, examine, in prayerful attention, the 
 word of God. La}^ the case before the Lord, and when you 
 pray, expect an ansioer. Jesus is the very same — as full of 
 compassion, sympathy, gentle, tender love, as when he walked 
 the streets of Jerusalem. Oh, aim to get his listening ear. 
 Without me, He says, ye can do nothing. It is as needful to 
 hearken and to expect an answer, as it is to pray. The Lord 
 does in reality bow down His ear to what His child would say. 
 J'his j)Oor man cried^ and the Lord heard him. Dear brother, 
 bear with an aged pilgrim who has almost got home — the 
 pearly gates in view. Heaven seems a glorious reality, and I 
 shall soon be there. It is all around us. Oh, to live for Him 
 who died for us, and in constant communication with the 
 Father, and His Son Jesus Christ. I am seldom in town, but 
 when I am, I occupy my place in John-street, and have found 
 it pleasant to hear and see you in that pulpit, where but a little 
 while ago I heard my beloved friend and pastor for so many 
 years." 
 
 To an eminent missionary, who, in his fervent and somewhat 
 indiscriminate denunciations of slavery, had alluded in strong 
 
228 MEMOIR OF Mr^S. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 terms to the system in the United States, without recognizing 
 the existence, and encouraging the labours, of those Cliristians 
 in America who, amidst obloquy, self-denial, and loss, Avere 
 toiling for the extinction of the evil, she addressed the follow- 
 ing affectionate and faithful remonstrance : — 
 
 " Beloved Brother in Jesus, — 
 
 " I rejoice that the Lord has so graciously blest your 
 work of faith and labour of love among the poor slaves in the 
 West Indies ; and may He go on to bless you. I feel it, 
 however, a duty I owe to many dear people of God, to en- 
 deavour to correct an unintentional mistake into which you 
 appear to have fallen, with respect to slavery in America. It 
 is in the Southern^ and not in the Northern States, that slavery 
 exists ; and even where it has its stronghold it is yielding to 
 the force of public sentiment. In the non-slave-holding states 
 there exists a noble band of Christians, who have come boldly 
 forward to grapple with the evil, and whose labours God is 
 blessing. You speak from hearsay, but I from personal obser 
 vation. During my recent visit to New York, the first anti- 
 slavery meeting was held by men who, in the fear of God, 
 went forth with their lives in their hands, boldly and fearlessly 
 protesting against the system. They took the spoiling of their 
 goods joyfully; their dwellings were assailed — their sanctuaries 
 were outraged — their persons were endangered ; but God up- 
 held them, and has so marvellously blest their efforts, that the 
 little band has become a great one, continues to increase, and 
 will increase, I doubt not, until there exists not a slave in 
 America. These dear men are not to be overlooked, but 
 acknowledged and affectionately encouraged, by all who love 
 the cause of universal emancipation. I am personally ac- 
 quainted with some of them, and a witness to what they 
 endured for C'~ rist's sake. We, in this land, can speak quietly 
 on this mattu-r, but it is quite another thing to confront the foe 
 on his own ground, which these men of God do. God bless 
 them and uphold their hands, until they shall see the blessed 
 gospel carried through the length and breadth of the land ; and 
 not a slave in that highly-favoured country be found who shall 
 not, in all the glory of his freedom, both from the bondage of 
 Satan and of man, stand up to praise God for having inclined 
 the hearts of His people to advocate their cause. May the 
 Lord bless you, and keep you near himself, that while you are 
 
COMMENCING THE DIVINE LIFE ARIGHT. 229 
 
 labouring for the souls of others, your own soul may be con- 
 tinually refreshed from the Fountain of living waters, is the 
 sincere prayer of, yours in the dear Redeemer." 
 
 TO HER NIECE, MRS. G. , ON COMMENCING THE DIVINE 
 
 LIFE ARIGHT. 
 
 "Dear M , March 30. 
 
 " I have only time to write a few lines in answer to 
 
 your question. Mr. E never did preach one thing and do 
 
 another. He does not himself baptize, as his health would 
 not admit of it ; but that he has been baptized is certain, and 
 your informer has been misinformed. . . . May the Lord 
 direct you in every step you take in this heavenward journey. 
 It is most important and eventful. Nothing on earth can 
 possibly be of equal moment to you and to me. Oh, to be 
 quite sure that we are right ! Short may be our journey, as 
 we have seen by many dear to us. They have passed away, 
 and we are following. The scene unfolding before us is grand 
 — it is most glorious. The prospect to me, at times, is most 
 dehghtful, and soon shall I see Jesus, my best Friend, with 
 whom I have had sweet communion here, and so many precious 
 souls dear to me, among the millions that surround the throne. 
 Oh, commence this journey right. Everything depends upon 
 a right beginning. One wrong turn in setting out, and all will 
 be wrong the whole of the way. The starting point for the 
 saint of God is the finished work of Jesus — to know he is 
 pardoned and accepted in the Beloved of God the Father. It 
 is then he knows his election of God, and can. say, ' I am 
 saved ! ' He then can run the race with holy delight ; and 
 though he may necessarily have many enemies to contend with, 
 botli from within and from without, yet He who has once set 
 him upon his feet and bid him go forward, will watch Over 
 him, by day and by night, guide him and correct him when 
 needful, and assuredly enable him to hold out to the end. 
 And then the reward ! — Come, ye blessed of my Father. I do 
 not say that all the children of God have equally clear and 
 distinct evidences of their sonship ; but I do say they ought 
 to have it, and it is their own fault, and not Christ's, if they 
 have it not. I would inquire of such, Has Christ spoken 
 peace to your soul ? Has He manifested himself to you, 
 according to His promise ? If He has not, do not rest your- 
 
230 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 self, or gire Him rest, until you have that mighty blessing. 
 It is for any poor, needy, seeking sinner. Seek it until you 
 receive it, and be not satisfied without it. ' Ye shall find me 
 wlien ye seek me with your whole heart.' Many who, from 
 not setting out aright, have gone on sickly and infirm all their 
 journey, are never truly happy in themselves, or capable of 
 administering to the happiness of others. Jesus Christ is the 
 same now that He ever was. He that spoke to Abraham, to 
 Isaac, and to Jacob — who was with Moses in the wilderness, 
 and with the Apostles in their labours — who appeared to Saul 
 of Tarsus, and to many others, after His resurrection, is the 
 very same now. He is not changed one bit. He is as ready 
 now to make Himself known to His saints, and to speak sweet 
 peace to their souls, as He ever w^as. Only believe, and you 
 shall see, and your soul shall rejoice w4th joy unspeakable and 
 full of glory. Oh, to liave the Lord always with us, by day 
 and by night, and not to rest without we are sensible of His 
 precious presence ! Seek for Him ; for everything indicates 
 that His coming draweth nigh. Have your lamp bright and 
 shining — plenty of oil in your vessel." 
 
 TO ONE OF HER SONS ON PUBLIC PRAYER AND READING. 
 
 " . . . .1 have often wished to say a word on the 
 subject of public pra3'er and reading. You know my dislike 
 to 2)reaching in j:)rayer ; and you also disapprove of it. And 
 yet I think many ministers are apt to fall into the same evil, 
 although I know some who never do. Prayer is the most 
 holy exercise of the soul, and should be the pure breathings 
 of the renewed heart in humble, earnest petition, as in the 
 presence of a holy God. And when the soul feels in the pres- 
 ence of God, and loses sight of the worms of the dust who 
 are listening to Him, there is no self-seeking or wish to please 
 the ear of man, but humbly to get the blessed ear of God him- 
 self. This may be a difficult matter at times, but the more it 
 is tried, the more the Lord, the Spirit, will aid the effort. My 
 opinion is, that both prayer and preaching should be what the 
 poorest might imderstand and feel, and also meet the warmest 
 desires and approbation of the most cultivated intellect. How 
 sweet is the simple, precious truth just as the Scriptures give 
 us ! May the Lord bestow every gift and grace of His Holy 
 Spirit, and anoint most richly for His own work. Again, I 
 have observed that in reading the Scriptures in public, there is 
 
ox INTERCOURSE WITH GOD. 231 
 
 frequently this defect. For instance, the epistles are often 
 read in a devotional tone of voice. Now, they are merely 
 letters to the churches, and should be read in the same tone of 
 voice as one would read a letter, and not as if one were pray- 
 ing. Then, again, the gospels are mere narratives, or details 
 of the history of the church and the apostles, and should be 
 read in the same manner in which one would read any other 
 history. Some of the Psalms may be read in a more solemn 
 and devotional tone of voice, but not all. Those that David 
 offered as prayers should be read as prayers, but no others 
 A person with a refined taste and a cultivated ear would soon 
 detect the inconsistencies. I think a good reader is almost as 
 necessary as a good 2)reacher ; indeed, the one seems essential 
 to the other." 
 
 TO HER SON, REV. G. E. W , ON INTERCOURSE WITH GOD. 
 
 " . . . . As it respects what is generally called 
 'news,' I have none to tell; but as you will expect to hear 
 from me, I can have a little chat with you ; for how strange it 
 would be if a Christian mother had nothing to say to a believ- 
 ing child, without adverting to this poor dying world, while 
 professing to be striving for another and a better ! Is there 
 not enough in a precious Jesus to engage all our thoughts and 
 all our hearts? We love to talk of an absent friend who is 
 dear to us ; and what friend is there like Him ? And should 
 He not be dearer to us than the dearest object on earth? 
 He is that Friend that sticketh closer than a brother^ and a Brother 
 born for adversity. Let us not for a moment imagine that 
 when things go smooth with us here, that we are no more to 
 see tribulation, that we shall have no more time of trouble. 
 If we forget or neglect Him in prosperity, will He hear and 
 answer us in adversity ? Oh, let this base ingratitude be far 
 from us. Let Him be our chief joy now. Let us keep very 
 near to Him, and let no idol come between our soul and our 
 best, nearest, and dearest Friend. Believe me, when I have 
 passed an hour in company with the worldling, and the pre- 
 cious Saviour has never been mentioned, I have felt, when 
 upon my knees, guilty before Him, and have hid my face in 
 shame ; and more so still, when He has condescended to seol 
 a fresh pardon through the application of His precious blood, 
 by the power of the Holy Ghost, Oh, how dead are the 
 unconverted to this heavenly, holy intercourse between a child 
 
232 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 of God and his Heavenly Father ! Truly, the secret of the 
 Lord is ivith them that fear Him. ... I wish you had 
 one day set apart at your own house, or in the church, for 
 meeting and conversing with those who are inquiring their 
 way to Zion. Good Mr. does this, and also has a par- 
 ticular service with the believers every week, to know the 
 state of their souls. Be thou diligent to hnoiu the state of thy 
 flock. Take heed^ therefore, imto yourselves, and to all the flock 
 over which the Holy Ghost hath made you overseer, to feed the 
 church of God, ivhich He hath purchased with His oiun hlood. 
 Oh, walk in the truth, to the glory of Him who will have you 
 render up an account of your stewardship at that great day, 
 for which all other days were made." 
 
 The reader will not fail to have remarked how strong a hold 
 upon her faith and Christian feelings the doctrine of our Lord's 
 resurrection maintained. It might almost be said to have 
 been the truth which the Holy Spirit unfolded to her mind. 
 She saw, as w4th the keen eye of the acutest theologian, the 
 intimate and essential relation of this single truth to the whole 
 Christian scheme. This one fact of the gospel verified, she 
 knew that all other doctrines were true. Her whole Christian 
 life was a constant dealing with the life of Jesus. In the 
 grace that sanctified her, in the strength that supported, and in 
 the consolations that soothed her, she was a constant witness 
 of the fact that — Jesus ivas alive. She was never known to 
 linger at His empty grave. Often has she been seen to weep 
 at His cross, never at His tomb. The sufferings of Christ 
 have been known to dissolve her whole soul into penitence ; 
 the resurrection of Christ to fill it with the sublimest joy. 
 And who, with any spiritual apprehension of this truth, will 
 charge her with exaggerating either its importance or its pre- 
 ciousness ? The resurrection of Christ is the resurrection-life 
 of the Christian. A living Christ dwells in him — a living 
 Christ intercedes for him — a hving Christ upholds, guides, 
 shields, and comforts him; and when "Christ, toho is our life, 
 shall appear, then we also shall appear with Him in glory." 
 
 " I experienced much comfort and enjoymerrt this morning, 
 in meditating on the resurrection of Christ. I felt that He 
 was really risen ; that my best and dearest Friend was truly 
 alive and in heaven for me ; there, seated at the right hand 
 of God, loving and watching over me and mine, and that I 
 was safe in His hands, come life, come death. I fell upoa 
 
LOOKING UNTO TESUS. 233 
 
 mj knees, and poured out my soul in adoring gratitude, praise, 
 and thanksgiving. I long for another fresh token of His love 
 in the conversion of all dear to me. I thought of the stone 
 rolled from the door of the sepulchre, while Mary was pon- 
 dering in her mind how it could be accomplished. The Lord, 
 who can do all things, can remove the stone that lieth upon 
 the dead, and the dead shall live to praise and bless His holy 
 name." 
 
 " The only way which a good and gracious God has pointed 
 out to us in the Scriptures, in which we may be enabled to go 
 on our heavenly journey is, by looking unto jesus, not only 
 when we first commence, but all our journey through. In 
 the first place, we ought to be well assured that we have really 
 and truly been reconciled to God through the precious peace- 
 speaking blood of His dear Son. If we have sought Him 
 with our whole heart, we have found Him ; and if we have 
 found Him, we must know that all our sins are freely forgiven 
 for His sake. Ye shall find me luhen ye seek me ivith your 
 whole heart. This is true, for God, who cannot lie, says it." 
 
 "LOOKING UXTO JESUS. 
 
 "Wherefore droops thy trembhng soul? 
 
 Wherefore sadden'd is thy brow ? 
 Clouds around thy path may roll, 
 
 But thy God is present now. 
 Raise thine eyes, the cross is there, 
 
 Steadfast still, though tempest frown ; 
 Lift up thy head, and make tliy prayer, 
 
 Claim thy Saviour for thine own ; 
 Make through Him thy deep appeal, 
 LooKiN'Cr UXTO Jesus, kneel. 
 
 " He, the Author of the faith 
 
 winch thy Spirit sliall renew, 
 In His sacred hour of death 
 
 Finish'd th}^ salvation too. 
 Learn thy Saviour's power to see ; 
 
 He, the life, the truth, the way, 
 Ints-'rceded e'en for thee, 
 
 Ere thy heart had learn'd to pray. 
 Lift thy heart, and raise thy hand, 
 Looking uxto Jesus, stand. 
 
 " When the water-floods of grief 
 
 Round thy helpless head shall rise, 
 When there seemeth no relief, 
 
 Look toward the eternal skies : 
 
236 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 God is only effectually profitable as it is worked out by the 
 trying providence of God in the soul's deep experience. Head- 
 knowledge will not do. Hearing with the outward ear does 
 but little for the soul, enables it to make no headway towards 
 heaven, or unfolds to us the tenderness of Christ, or the real 
 character of God. The truth as it is in Jesus is more known 
 in one deep trial than a year of smooth sailing. Worldly pros- 
 perity is but indifferent soil for the Christian to grow in. It 
 rather stunts the soul ; and nothing but an Almighty arm can 
 save from the sleep of death." 
 
 Not only w^as she permitted to see her children, but her 
 children's children, avowing her covenant God as their God 
 and Portion. She thus gratefully records the interesting 
 event : — 
 
 From her Diary. — " The w^ork of grace in the family has 
 
 filled our hearts with wonder and joy. Three of T 's 
 
 children, I do trust, have been brought to surrender their 
 hearts to Jesus. The Lord is answering my prayers ; He has 
 dropped the mantle of His love upon my grandchildren, and 
 called them into His kingdom. The work in their hearts is a 
 gentle drawing with the cords of love to a Father's reconciled 
 bosom, where, I trust, their precious souls will be screened 
 from all the evil of an evil world, and be prepared to serve 
 Him here and hereafter. Their convictions of sin have not 
 been deep, but God the Spirit works as a Sovereign in all He 
 does ; and what they know not now they will know hereafter, 
 as he leads them onward. Perhaps, if they knew w^hat a bed 
 of impiety lies deeply seated in their hearts, they would at 
 once sink into despair, and give up all for lost. But the Lord 
 will, by little and little, make them acquainted with their own 
 hearts in the same proportion as they know His heart. Oh, 
 how wisely He acts in all His dealings with His children ! 
 He gives no account of any of His matters, but acts as a Sove- 
 reign on His throne." 
 
 " In my private reading this morning, went through God's 
 gracious dealings with the children of Israel, in tlie third chap- 
 ter of Joshua, in dividing the waters of Jordan, and taking 
 them over in safety to the good land He had promised to 
 Moses. Afterwards, I read the same in the family, and found 
 much liberty in speaking a little from it. It was sweetly en- 
 couraging to my own soul ; for Joshua's God is my God ; and, 
 although I hear no audible voice from heaven, I hear the still 
 
DIARY. 237 
 
 small voice of the Spirit speaking to my inmost heart. Blessed 
 be God for the precious revelations of His holy will concerning 
 us ! I am in a wilderness, but God is with me. I walk by 
 faith, and not by sight. He is in all things concerning me. I 
 find it the hardest thing to sit still when in difficulties. My 
 busy, unbelieving heart is ever for doing or undoing, — planning 
 and arranging better and quicker than a good and wise God. 
 Oh, to be still and wait patiently on God ! this is my wisdom. 
 I thank Him for keeping me from betraying outwardly my 
 spirit, however the storm may have raged within, and thus 
 bringing dishonour on Him whom my soul loveth. I bless 
 him for preventing grace, for restraining grace, for a throne of 
 grace, where I can relieve my burdened heart, and tell Him 
 all, keeping nothing back, good or had. Oh, is not this a 
 mighty privilege ? The God of Heaven, the Creator of all 
 worlds, stooping in love to simple dust! Had sweet access to 
 Him this morning in private. His presence humbled and 
 melted my heart with deep contrition. How I loathe myself, 
 at such favoured seasons, in dust and ashes before Him !" 
 
 "Have been forcibly impressed with the truth, that the 
 kingdom of God comes not with observation. A stander-by 
 knows nothing of what is passing within the soul of the be- 
 liever — the mighty work which God the Spirit is carrying si- 
 lently on. The hidden evil is revealed — his soul, in sorrow, 
 flees to Jesus — the Comforter applies the blood to the accusing 
 and disturbed conscience — the throne is erected — the King 
 reigns supreme — the soul rejoices ; — all this transpires in the 
 believer without any outward sign, and the world knows it 
 not. And so the kingdom of God's grace in the soul worketh 
 secretly and silently, and without observation." 
 
 " My memory fails me Lord, whatever else fails me, 
 
 never, oh, never let me forget Thee, nor cease to pray and 
 praise while I have breath to do it ! Oh, thou blessed and 
 Eternal Spirit, help my infirmities, and open both my heart 
 and my mouth ! Oh, take of the things of Jesus, and show 
 them to me, that I may be enabled to ask and expect 
 great things from Thee for His dear sake ! Lord, teach me to 
 pray ! I would sit at Thy feet as a httle child and learn of 
 Thee. Lord, help me ! Strengthen me, for I am poor and 
 needy ! My soul trusteth in Thee ; let me not be put to 
 shame. Suffer me not to grieve Thy Holy Spirit, or dis- 
 honour Thee before the rising generation ! Thou hast prom- 
 
238 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 ised never to leave nor forsake me, and, even down to hoar 
 hairs, to carry me." 
 
 " How wonderful is God in all His great and gracious deal- 
 ings ! He places us, as soon as the spiritual eye is opened, in 
 His school. First, the infant-school ; and then onward and 
 upward, from class to class, losing no opportunity of spiritual 
 instruction. Many hard lessons have we to learn and to re- 
 learn. But, oh, the unwearied patience and tenderness of our 
 Teacher ! Some of His children are slow learners, dull schol- 
 ars, and require the discipline of the rod to stimulate them to 
 more earnestness, attention, and submission. Some imagine 
 they have arrived at the end of their education, and sit down 
 at their ease : but presently they are called upon to solve some 
 hard problem, and they find that they know less than they 
 thought, and for their boasting are sent back to a lower class, 
 and made to commence where they first began. Such is the 
 school of Christ. Lord, teach me more and more of Thyself, 
 and of my own poverty, misery, and weakness. And, oh, un- 
 fold to my longing eyes and heart what there is in Thyself to 
 supply all my need, and in Thy loving, willing heart, to do all 
 for me, and all in me, to fit me for Thy service here, and for 
 Thy presence hereafter ! Sanctify abundantly all Thy varying 
 dispensations to the welfare and prosperity of my soul, and in- 
 crease in me every gift and grace of thy Spirit, that I may 
 show forth Thy praise, and walk humbly and closely with 
 Thee. Thou knowest what a poor, worthless worm I am, and 
 how utterly unworthy of the least mercy from Thy merciful 
 hands ; but Thou lovest to bestow Thy favours upon the poor 
 and needy, such as me, thou most precious Lord. Thou hast 
 been a good and gracious, sin-pardoning God to my soul, and 
 a very present help in every time of trouble. Leave me not, 
 nor forsake me, now that old age is overtaking me, and grey 
 hairs thicken upon me. I know Thou wilt not. Thou, who 
 hast been with me all my journey, wilt not leave me now ; for 
 Thou art faithful that hast promised. I feel my dependence 
 on Thee more than ever. Without Thee I can do nothing. 
 Helpless as an infant, I hang upon Thee, to do all for me and 
 all in me. Oh, what a Friend is Christ to me ! " 
 
 " 111 in bed with influenza. The Lord still gracious and 
 kind. All is in love. No good thing does He withhold. 
 Mercy, mercy, mercy, all is mercy. The bush on fire, and not 
 consumed, — such am I. Sin enough in my flesh to kindle a 
 
DIARY. 239 
 
 flame that never could be quenched ; but the Spirit is there to 
 overcome ; and faith, however weak, is always a conqueror. 
 Faith honours God, and God honours faith. Little faith never 
 need to hang its head ; it can do wonders with God, and for 
 God. It is His own gift, and given like Himself, full and free, 
 and it is ever pointing to eternity. " 
 
CHAPTER XI. 
 
 *' If the Lord has ever honoured me in any way by making 
 use of me, it has been in comforting the comfortless, or in 
 speaking a word to the tried and heavy-laden ; but never, to 
 my knowledge, in rousing the dead sinner, I must leave that 
 to better hands. God does not honour me much in that way. 
 He fits His people for whatever work He has for them to do, 
 and when they attempt any other they fail. And yet I do 
 feel most anxious for the conversion of sinners. No subject 
 lies so near my heart, and for nothing do I more earnestly 
 pray." Such were the lowly views of herself, as cherished by 
 the subject of this memorial. And what, though her talent 
 w^as single, and her mission limited ? What if God had con- 
 fided to her no other and costlier gift, or had appointed her to 
 no higher or wider sphere than that of counselling, succouring, 
 and sympathizing with the perplexed, the feeble, and the tried 
 of His family ? Surely, it were a gift to which the highest 
 angel in heaven might aspire, and a mission he might pant to 
 discharge. To this work, for w4nch she seemed peculiarly and 
 pre-eminently fitted, she was, in the providence of God, fre- 
 quently called. Schooled in adversity, she knew how to ad- 
 dress herself to those who Avere tracing the dreary path she 
 had already trod. Having drunk deeply of the cup of grief, 
 she could speak a word of heart-cheer to those whose lips were 
 but just touching its brim. Call we this a feeble gift, a minor 
 mission ? Oh, there is no distinction like that of being a hene- 
 factor of MIND ; and there is no privilege like that of expressing 
 sympathy witli sorrow. But how little is the philosophy of 
 sympathy understood ! How few regard and cultivate it as a 
 self-disciplinary feeling, equally as a means of soothing and al- 
 leviation to others ! And yet there is scarcely a single one in 
 the class of our emotional feelings more peculiarly adapted to 
 work out this grand res?ult. "Sympathy," as an eminent phil* 
 [2401 
 
ON CONSOLATION. 241 
 
 osophical writer justly remarks, "by bringing us in contact 
 with individuals in various forms and degrees of suffering, tends 
 to withdraw us from the power of self-love, and the deluding 
 influence of present things. . . . The due cultivation of the 
 benevolent affections, therefore, is not properly to be considered 
 as the object of moral approbation, but rather as a process of 
 moral culture. They may enable us in some degree to benefit 
 others, but their chief benefit is to ourselves."* Who cannot, 
 from experience, testify to the truth of this ? Who that has 
 sought to soothe another's woe has not found a balm for his 
 own lonely grief ? Who that has poured out his soul in inter- 
 cessory supplications for others has not felt the prayer he 
 breathed to Heaven returning into his own bosom laden with 
 its joy and peace ? In a word, who, in the indulgence of a 
 sacred benevolence, and with a single eye to the Divine glory, 
 has ever attempted the accomplishment of any good, has not 
 been conscious of a mental enjoyment the most exquisite, and 
 of a moral discipline the most salutary ? Such is the reflex 
 influence of true sympathy. It is now our privilege to present 
 a few of Mrs. Winslow's letters of Christian consolation, se- 
 lected from a large mass, without any particular regard to 
 exact chronological arrangement. The following remarks from 
 her Diary may not be an inappropriate introduction to these 
 epistles : — 
 
 " I think, if the believer makes any attainment in the knowl- 
 edge of God and of himself, or any advance in the Divine life, 
 he must have much to do with the varied and changing prov- 
 idences of God. In this way the Spirit chiefly and mainly 
 worketh in him, and grounds and settles him in the truth. 
 There is not a single truth in God's word which will be of any 
 avail to us, but as it is wrought out in the experience of the 
 soul, by the power of the Holy Ghost, through the varying 
 dispensations of Divine Providence. Thus the Israelites were 
 led through many trials and difficulties in the wilderness, to 
 show them what was in them. We are such obtuse scholars ; 
 and I often wonder and wonder again at the patience of a 
 good, gracious, and unchanging God towards us. He varies 
 His dealings, that He might teach us our nothingness, weak- 
 ness, and total helplessness. Faith, too, is constantly brought 
 into exercise, and is thereby increased in strength, by an in- 
 
 * Abercrombie on the Moral Feelings. 
 ]] 
 
CHAPTER XI 
 
 *' If the Lord has ever honoured me in any way by making 
 use of me, it has been in comforting the comfortless, or in 
 speaking a word to the tried and heavy-laden ; but never, to 
 my knowledge, in rousing the dead sinner. I must leave that 
 to better hands. God does not honour me much in that way. 
 He fits His people for whatever work He has for them to do, 
 and when they attempt any other they fail. And yet I do 
 feel most anxious for the conversion of sinners. No subject 
 lies so near my heart, and for nothing do I more earnestly 
 pray." Such were the lowly views of herself, as cherished by 
 the subject of this memorial. And what, though her talent 
 was single, and her mission limited ? What if God had con- 
 fided to her no other and costlier gift, or had appointed her to 
 no higher or wider sphere than that of counselling, succouring, 
 and sympathizing with the perplexed, the feeble, and the tried 
 of His family ? Surely, it were a gift to which the highest 
 angel in heaven might aspire, and a mission he might pant to 
 discharge. To this work, for which she seemed pecuharly and 
 pre-eminently fitted, she Avas, in the providence of God, fre- 
 quently called. Schooled in adversity, she knew how to ad- 
 dress herself to those who were tracing the dreary path she 
 had already trod. Having drunk deeply of the cup of grief, 
 she could speak a word of heart-cheer to those whose lips were 
 but just touching its brim. Call we this a feeble gift, a minor 
 mission ? Oh, there is no distinction like that of being a hene- 
 f actor of MIND ; and there is no privilege like that of expressing 
 sympathy with sorrow. But how little is the philosophy of 
 sympathy understood ! How few regard and cultivate it as a 
 self-disciplinary feeling, equally as a means of soothing and al- 
 leviation to others ! And yet there is scarcely a single one in 
 the class of our emotional feelings more peculiarly adapted to 
 work out this grand result. " Sympathy," as an eminent phil- 
 [240] 
 
ON CONSOLATION. 241 
 
 osophical writer justly remarks, "by bringing us in contact 
 with individuals in various forms and degrees of suffering, tends 
 to withdraw us from the power of self-love, and the deluding 
 influence of present things. . . . The due cultivation of the 
 benevolent affections, therefore, is not properly to be considered 
 as the object of moral approbation, but rather as a process of 
 moral culture. They may enable us in some degree to benefit 
 others, but their chief benefit is to ourselves."* Who cannot, 
 from experience, testify to the truth of this ? Who that has 
 sought to soothe another's woe has not found a balm for his 
 own lonely grief ? Who that has poured out his soul in inter- 
 cessory supplications for others has not felt the prayer he 
 breathed to Heaven returning into his own bosom laden with 
 its joy and peace? In a word, who, in the indulgence of a 
 sacred benevolence, and with a single eye to the Divine glory, 
 has ever attempted the accomplishment of any good, has not 
 been conscious of a mental enjoyment the most exquisite, and 
 of a moral discipline the most salutary ? Such is the reflex 
 influence of true sympathy. It is now our privilege to present 
 a few of Mrs. Winslow's letters of Christian consolation, se- 
 lected from a large mass, without any particular regard to 
 exact chronological arrangement. The following remarks from 
 her Diary may not be an inappropriate introduction to these 
 epistles : — 
 
 " I think, if the believer makes any attainment in the knowl- 
 edge of God and of himself, or any advance in the Divine life, 
 he must have much to do with the varied and changing prov- 
 idences of God. In this way the Spirit chiefly and mainly 
 worketh in him, and grounds and settles him in the truth. 
 There is not a single truth in God's word which will be of any 
 avail to us, but as it is wrought out in the experience of the 
 soul, by the power of the Holy Ghost, through the varying 
 dispensations of Divine Providence. Thus the Israelites were 
 led through many trials and difficulties in the wilderness, to 
 show them what was in them. We are such obtuse scholars ; 
 and I often wonder and wonder again at the patience of a 
 good, gracious, and unchanging God towards us. He varies 
 His dealings, that He might teach us our nothingness, weak- 
 ness, and total helplessness. Faith, too, is constantly brought 
 into exercise, and is thereby increased in strength, by an in- 
 
 * Abercrombie on the Moral Feelings. 
 11 
 
242 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 creasing knowledge of God's veracity, power, and love. We 
 often pray, Lord^ increase our faith. The Lord, in answering 
 this prayer, places us in such circumstances as call it forth. 
 The little we have (and we often find we have much less than 
 we thought we had) is to set to work with God, with whom 
 alone faith has to do. Providences, adverse and painful, stir 
 up to cry mightily unto God. Then come in the promises. 
 These become unspeakably precious. Faith takes them, as so 
 many promissory notes, to the great Promiser for acceptance. 
 Faith takes them, as so many promissory notes, to the great 
 Promiser for acceptance. Faith knocks and waits, knocks and 
 waits again ; thus is it exercised and increased. Presently the 
 hand, the helping hand, is held out, and deliverance comes, 
 and God, the mighty Deliverer, is seen. Then we say, The 
 Lord is my helper ; I luill not fear what man can do unto me. 
 All our journey through, from first to last, the great work of 
 preparation for usefulness in His service here, and for the rich 
 enjoyment of His presence in glory, is thus carrying on in the 
 soul of the believer. When his spiritual education is finished, 
 he is at once put in possession of the inheritance prepared for 
 him from before the foundation of the world. Oh, what a God 
 is ours ! Who is like Him in wisdom and goodness, mercy 
 and truth ?" 
 
 To a beloved friend, endeared by a long and tried friend- 
 ship, she thus writes, in a season of anxiety : — 
 
 "Beloved in the Lord Jesus, — 
 
 " I remember you in my poor prayers, and do trust 
 the Lord will be with you, giving all needful grace, wisdom, 
 and above all, precious faith, to cast your burden upon Him, 
 and from whom cometh all our help. Is He not a present help 
 in time of trouble ? He w411 carry you through your labour 
 of love, for His name's sake, and give you to acknowledge, 
 that as your day, so was your strength. Has He not given 
 you a work to do for Him, and will He not fit you for the 
 work, seeing His own glory is connected with it ? Fear not, 
 then ; Jesus is with you and me. He has laid by one upon 
 whom, perhaps, you depended too much, to show you how 
 easily and blessedly He can work by whatever instruments He 
 chooses to employ. We are so prone to look to the creature ; 
 and then He takes our prop away, that we may lean upon 
 Him and upon Him only. . . . Now, beloved sister, be of 
 
LETTERS OF CHRISTIAN SYMPATHY. 243 
 
 good courage. God is with you, Christ is with you, the Holy 
 Ghost is with you, and all the host of heaven are with you, 
 and you need not fear. Be not over-anxious. There is an 
 anxiety that borders on unbelief. Get rid of that, and believe 
 that Jesus is really with you in all you have to do for the 
 spiritual welfare of those dear children. I grieve for dear 
 
 Mr. . May the trial be abundantly sanctified to him. If 
 
 he is to be useful, he must have trials ; and, perhaps, God is 
 teaching him some precious truth from soul-experience, for 
 which he will have to praise and bless Him throughout 
 eternity. He does nothing in vain towards His own people, 
 for He loves them too well to afflict them for nought. I shall 
 continue to remember you all ; and do not forget your sister 
 in the tribulation and kingdom of Jesus Christ, for I truly need 
 your prayers. 
 
 TO MISS L. , ON THE DEATH OF HER MOTHER. 
 
 " My dear YOUNG Friend, — October 28th, 1851. 
 
 " I have been longing to write to you ; but although 
 I have not done so yet, you and your dear sisters have been 
 much in my heart and in my thoughts. The Lord has taken 
 from you your dear mother, I humbly hope to His own loving 
 self. If so, you will meet her again ; and oh, what a meeting 
 will that be ! What a gathering ! Your dear mother is now 
 beyond all care and anxiety, hushed to peace in the bosom of 
 Jesus, the Saviour of sinners. Think of her as she now is. 
 She has seen the Lord. What a change, from a bed of weari- 
 ness and a body of suffering, to be in an instant in the presence 
 and within the arms of Christ ! Oh, let it be our aim, our 
 chief business, and the desire of our souls, to walk humbly and 
 closely with God ! In a little while and we pass away ; and 
 oh, how we shall wonder at ourselves that we could have suf- 
 fered any one thing to divert our minds, even for a moment, 
 from the great, the overwhelming concerns of eternity! . . . 
 And now you are cast, in an especial manner, on the all-pro- 
 tecting care and love of Jesus Himself, who will be both a 
 Father and a Mother to you all. I often think of the last 
 
 interview I had with your dear mother. Lady , when 
 
 she called upon me at Brighton. How little did I then think 
 I should see her no more on earth ! She looked so well, and 
 was in such good spirits. Now she is wdth Jesus. Oh, the 
 infinite comnassion of the Lord ! A look, a desire, a sigh He 
 
244 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 will acknowledge. Great faith will bring great comfort into 
 the soul, but little faith can get to heaven. If no more than 
 as a grain of mustard-seed, it will land the soul safely there. 
 Blessed be God for all His great, rich, and precious promises. 
 They are all like Himself. And now, beloved friend, it is the 
 will of God that you should look to Him, and to Him only. 
 He is a Father to the fatherless. Whatever your care or 
 trouble may be, take it at once to Jesus. Your present position 
 is an enviable one ; for, if God be for you, who can be against 
 you ? Were your dear father and mother still with you, what 
 could they do for you more than God Himself can do ?" 
 
 TO THE SAME. 
 
 "January 10th. — I am longing to hear how the Lord your 
 God and Father is dealing with you. You are peculiarly His 
 own. When father and mother go, then the Lord will take 
 you up, and carry you in His loving fatherly arms, care for, 
 and lead you through this wilderness ; so that you have noth- 
 ing to fear, and nothing to do but to trust in the Lord with all 
 
 your heart. Has your brother E arrived ? and how is 
 
 he ? I feel deeply interested in you all, since your trying and 
 heavy loss. Your orphan state, at present, is one of peculiar 
 and tender interest. May the Lord enable you to take a fresh 
 hold of Him, and he will prove Himself better than ten par- 
 ents. Why has he dealt thus with you ? To bring you to a 
 better acquaintance with Himself, that you might know more 
 of that loving, faithful heart, that says, I will never leave thee 
 nor forsake thee. I would not have been without my sad trials 
 for ten thousand worlds. What should I have known, the 
 little I do know, of His wondrous, tender, and imchanging 
 love, but for them ? The Lord bless you and your dear sis- 
 ters, and keep them in the hollow of His hand, and bring them 
 to His heavenly kingdom. And oh, what a meeting we shall 
 have in heaven ! This is but a wilderness, and, like the chil- 
 dren of Israel, we must pass through it to reach our heavenly 
 home. Live much in holy contemplation of the glory that awaits 
 you. This will enable you to bear the bitter trials that daily 
 cross your path. Carry all your difficulties, small and great, 
 at once to Jesus. His ear is open to your requests, and He 
 will make every crooked path straight, and rough path smooth. 
 We are on a journey, and how soon it terminates ! But, oh, 
 how awfully blind are many who call themselves Christians ! 
 
LETTERS OF CHRISTIAN SYMPATHY. 245 
 
 Religious formalism is the bane of thousands. They say 
 prayers — but never pray. They know nothing of the great 
 change from nature to grace — nothing of the new birth. They 
 have no personal, spiritual acquaintance with Christ ; nothing of 
 real conversion. Is it not melancholy to see so many whom 
 we love, yet living in the gall of bitterness and in the bond of 
 iniquity, while we know that dying in that state they are lost 
 for ever ? Oh, let us pray for them, who know not to pray 
 
 for themselves. My love to Mrs. F ; to your aunts at 
 
 Brighton. I love all who love Christ. Also, your brothers 
 and sisters. They are one family. Oh, to be a whole family 
 in heaven ! Let me hear from you." 
 
 TO MRS. F , ON THE ILLNESS OF HER HUSBAND. 
 
 " Beloved Friend, — January 26th, 1852. 
 
 "I hear your dear husband is ill. May the Lord heal 
 and comfort him. May he have the enjoyment of His mani- 
 fested presence. Satan will try hard to harass him, but Jesus 
 is near. His darling attribute is mercy — mercy to the chief 
 of sinners is the delight of His soul. Call ujDon me in the day 
 of trouble^ and I will deliver thee, and thou shalt glorify me. 
 Look unto me, and he ye saued. This same Jesus, tell your 
 husband, is waiting to be gracious to him. He listens to hear 
 his voice. I trust he is resting alone in Him. Tell him not 
 to look within for evidence, but to look direct to Jesus only. 
 He is just the same that He was when He trod the streets of 
 Jerusalem. Was He ever known to reject any who came to 
 Him ? It is not in the heart of Jesus to turn away from the 
 vilest who call upon Him. It is sinners He came to save, not 
 saints, and as sinners we must come. I trust the Lord will 
 comfort you in your present trial. May He manifest Himself 
 to your dear husband ! I enclose for you the ' Untrodden 
 Path.' " 
 
 TO THE SAME ON THE DEATH OF HER HUSBAND. 
 
 " I only heard of your loss yesterday. The Lord has taken 
 your dear husband from the evil to come, and in a Httle while 
 you shall meet him again. May He comfort your sorrowing 
 heart with a blessed realization of that glorious truth. Them 
 also luhich sleep in Jesus ivill God bring with Him. And should 
 He call us away before He comes, we shall still meet them in 
 glory, and join our shouts of praise with theirs. In the mean- 
 
246 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WTNSLOW. 
 
 time, beloved friend, you are the object of His especial care, 
 as His endeared child. You have a double claim on Jesus 
 now, who is the liusband to the widoiu. Gro to Him with all 
 your fears, your difficulties, your pressures, whatever they may 
 be ; great or small, real or imaginary. His loving ear will be 
 ever open to listen to your voice. Your oneness with Jesus 
 makes your cares His cares, your concerns His concerns. He 
 will deny you nothing that will be for your good or comfort. 
 This will make the little space left us on earth less irksome ; 
 and constant communion with this precious Friend will tend 
 to conform us to His image. Let me hear how the Lord dealt 
 with your dear departed, and how He is dealing with your 
 bereaved heart. Oh, what an honour put upon us, to have 
 Christ as our Husband; and now that He has written you a 
 widow, this is what He is to you and to me." 
 
 TO MRS. E B , ON THE DEATH OF HER CHILD. 
 
 " My DEAR YOUNG FrIEND, 
 
 "I see, by the papers, the Lord has been pleased again 
 to try you in removing, or shall I not rather say, in housing, 
 another of your little ones ; it is gone to join the host of those 
 already there. ^ 0/ such,' says Christ, '^s the kingdom of 
 heaven.'' This has been, no doubt, a severe trial, and your 
 affectionate heart has deeply felt it, as well as your dear hus- 
 band. But as there is nothing that can take place towards a 
 child of Gi-od but what our Heavenly Father designs, in infinite 
 love, for our spiritual advancement, which is closely connected 
 with His own glory, we are to submit to His holy will, and 
 believe that there was a needs-be for it. The Lord loves His 
 children too well to lay upon them the weight of a feather, 
 without an absolute necessity. I hope you have been enabled 
 to say, Not my will, hut Thine he done. Perhaps, in this afflic- 
 tion, you have felt it hard in God to deal thus with you ; and 
 the enemy may have suggested that God could not love you, 
 or He would not so afflict you. Now, the reverse is the case. 
 The Lord chastens those whom He loves; and were we 
 without chastisement, we might well doubt our sonship. 
 Your little ones are not lost, but have only preceded you to 
 glory. They are taken from the evil to come. The Lord 
 loved them better than you could do, or He would not have 
 reheved them so soon from all the ills and temptations of this 
 poor, wicked world. A time of affliction should be a search- 
 
LETTERS OF CHRISTIAN SYMPATHY. 247 
 
 ing time with our liearts. "We should see how matters stand 
 between our souls and a heart-trying God, He is jealous of 
 our love. Pie will occupy the first place. And if, upon in- 
 vestigation, we find tliat the world or the creature has displaced 
 the Saviour from our affections, what, then, have we to do ? 
 Only to acknowledge our iniquity, returning to Him who is 
 willing to receive our confession, and to pardon our sin .... 
 May He comfort your heart and bless your soul." 
 
 TO MRS. C , ox HER ILLNESS. 
 
 " My dear Friend, — September 2nd, 1852. 
 
 " I was glad to see your handwriting to-da}^, but how sorry 
 [ was to hear you continue so tried in body ! Surely the 
 Lord loves you too well to lay the weight of a feather upon 
 you, were it not for some wise and loving purpose He has in 
 view preparing you for the full enjoyment of the glory He has 
 gone to prepare for you. Think of this wlien resting your 
 afflicted body, — Jesus had no bed on Avhich to rest — no voice 
 to speak a word of kindness ; persecuted and reviled, He 
 sought the dark and dreary mountain, and there He rested. 
 He was then paying our debt of sin to Divine Justice, and He 
 
 paid it to the last mite God, even our own 
 
 God, deals wisely and graciously with us in all His varying 
 dispensations. God is love, and no one that knows Him can 
 doubt it for a moment. If tears could be shed in heaven, we 
 should weep that we ever mistrusted His goodness in His 
 dealings towards us. Let us, in this world of trial, cling close 
 to Him, and lean more upon Him as little helpless children. 
 Keep a constant intercourse with Him. Tell Him all you feel, 
 or wish or want. Christ and you are one. We are bone of 
 
 His bone, and flesh of His flesh May the Lord's 
 
 richest blessings rest upon you." 
 
 TO THE SAME, ON THE DEATH OF HER SISTER. 
 
 " You have been in trouble, and I knew it not until last 
 evening. And has the Lord at last appeared for His suffering 
 child ? Has He taken her out of all her troubles, to lier hap- 
 py, happy home ? Long had she been refining in the furnace, 
 and preparing for that place Jesus had gone to take possession 
 of for her. Not one pain did she suffer, or sorrow did sh^ 
 feel, but had in it the tenderest love of Jesus, All was need- 
 ful. He was preparing her for the full enjoyment of His pres- 
 
248 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 ence. Shall not the Judge of all the earth do right? I wish 
 her joy. She has made her escape from a world of sin and 
 trouble, and from a body, not only of sin and death, but of 
 suffering, and long a clog to her soul. She has broken loose 
 from her cage, and is with Jesus. Oh, the happiness to look 
 upon Him — to behold Him in all His unveiled beauties — to 
 see Him face to face ! I rejoice that she is at last released. 
 1 feel heaven is very near. Oh, to be ready, quite ready ! 
 
 The recognition of the saints in glory is a sweet 
 thought. Shall we know Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, and 
 not know those with whom we have had sweet fellowship on 
 earth ? Surely we shall ; and one of the delightful employ- 
 ments of heaven will be, to trace back the way the Lord led 
 us safely, in spite of ourselves, through the wilderness world ; 
 and then shall we see how needful was every cross, and trial, 
 and pain, and dispensation, with which our precious Jesus saw 
 fit to exercise us. And we shall meet w^here all differences of 
 sentiment will be for ever done away, and w^e shall see eye to 
 eye, and Christ w^ill be all in all to our unhappy souls. Let 
 us try to be more like Christ, and less like ourselves. May 
 the Lord bless you, and comfort your heart, and the heart of 
 the bereaved widower,* and the motherless children, is my 
 earnest prayer." 
 
 TO MRS. C , AT A TIME OF DEEP AFFLICTION. 
 
 " Dear sister in Jesus, — Leamington, May 9th. 
 
 "My dear son has permitted me to see your mournful let 
 ter; and having myself passed through the dark waters of 
 tribulation, I thought I would drop you a line, to encourage 
 your heart in the Lord. When we recollect that Jesus and 
 His saints are one — I in you and you in me — that this blessed 
 union is eternal, and can never be dissolved ; then is He in all 
 our afflictions and trials, great and small. Nothing can take 
 place towards us but is especially designed for our advance- 
 ment in the Divine life. He has now placed you in just that 
 position to prove His faithfulness and love. Watch His tender 
 dealings towards you, and see if He does not prove to you that 
 He is better than ten husbands, or ten thousand friends. He 
 
 * The late Venerable Archdeacon Hodson, one of the brightest lights 
 of the Church of England, eminent for his sound theological views, as 
 for his earnest piety. He died recently, while making the tour of {ho 
 Continent. 
 
LETTERS OF CHRISTIAN SYMPATHY. 249 
 
 wants you to be better acquainted with Himself — to know 
 Him more personally. He wants you to have more to do with 
 Him, that you may understand more of His real character, 
 both as to His divine and human natures. These are stately 
 steppings Jesus is now taking with your soul. He says to you, 
 * Now come nearer to me, My child ; look more into My lov- 
 ing heart — see your name written there never to be effaced. 
 Fear not. I will never leave thee, for we are owe.' You 
 have hitherto loved Christ for saving your soul; now He 
 would have you love Him for what He is in Himself. How 
 can this be, unless you are brought into closer contact with 
 Him ? He has taken your husband, to place Himself in the 
 same position. He wants you to live a life of sweet, holy 
 dependence upon Him as your Husband, Friend, Provider, 
 Care-Taker, Benefactor. He designs to be all to you and 
 yours, a Father to the fatherless, and the widow's God. Be- 
 loved, you are highly honoured of God ; you are now in a 
 position to live a life of faith on the Son of God, — the hap- 
 piest, the holiest life a mortal can enjoy in this world. You 
 have now a twofold claim upon God, as His adopted and His 
 widowed child. Take Him now as one who has engaged to 
 provide for all your wants, and the wants of your children. 
 Go to him for all you need — not first to the creature, but to 
 Jesus at once. If we honour the creature more than we hon- 
 our Christ, we must expect He will suffer us to be disappoint- 
 ed. Tell all to Jesus ; keep nothing back from Him. Only 
 trust Him fully. Honour Him with your entire confidence. 
 "We live at too great a distance from Christ. He wants us to 
 experience more of His sympathy, His boundless love. His 
 nearness to, and His oneness with us. Forgive me if I have 
 presumed in giving this advice to one whom I only know 
 through her sweet letter, I am an aged pilgrim, who has 
 travelled this thorny road before you. I may be permitted to 
 speak a word for Jesus to one who, in some measure, is travel- 
 ling the same. May the Lord make these few hints a little 
 help to you in your pilgrimage. 
 
 to miss l. o , in behalf of a distressed clergyman. 
 
 "Dear young Friend, — 
 
 " You will, perliaps, call to mind the circumstance of the 
 ilev. Mr. , the clergyman, who has fallen into very dis- 
 tressed and trying circumstances. His health prevents him 
 11* 
 
250 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 from labouring as he could wish, and his family is large. I 
 wrote to dear Mr. Noel, and he has sent me a httle help ; and 
 now I must remind you of your promise to do what you can for 
 this dear afflicted servant of God. Inasmuch as ye have done 
 it unto one of the least of these^ my hrethren, ye have done it unto 
 Me. Do you remember James Montgomery's ' Stranger and 
 
 his Friend,' which S. C used to play with so much feeling, 
 
 and which always brought Jesus, precious, compassionate Jesus, 
 present to my mind ? A verse will remind you of it : — 
 
 'A poor wayfaring man of grief 
 Has often crossed me in my way, 
 And sued so humbly for relief, 
 That I could never answer, Nay. 
 
 ' I had not power to ask his name, 
 Whither he went, or whence he came ; 
 Yet there was something in his eye 
 That won my heart, I knew not why.* 
 
 I must send you the music. Your dear sister, M , will 
 
 sing it with effect. Now, will you endeavour among your 
 friends to assist this dear man ? See Christ in His servant, 
 believe and feel that you are doing it /or Him. Return me 
 the enclosed letters, and what your hand findeth to do, do it 
 quickly^ as I must hasten to send him all the aid I can. Dear 
 
 has commenced a course of sermons on the Creation. 
 
 The one last Lord's Day evening was on Genesis i. 2 : And 
 the earth was without form^ &c. The sweetest part was the 
 Spirit of God moving upon the face of the waters — figurative 
 of the Spirit hovering over the dark, chaotic soul of man. 
 The lecture was listened to with breathless silence, and, I hope, 
 was blessed to many a dark, unconverted soul present. Be 
 not long in answering this, as I shall wait impatiently until 
 some help be sent. I am informed they are really suffering 
 from want. My Christian love to all your circle." 
 
 TO HER SON, ON THE DEATH OF A CHILD. 
 
 "The Lord has mercifully housed our dear little sufferer; 
 has taken it to His garden of perfume above. It was so ap- 
 pointed by Infinite wisdom. I trust you will see it so. If 
 the utmost tenderness and love could have saved her, she 
 would have been saved, . . . She is not lost ; she is in the 
 tender bosom of Jesus ; and this was designed from eternity. 
 
LETTERS OF CHRISTIAN SYMPATHY. 251 
 
 May your hearts be comforted, and you be enabled to say, 
 ' The Lord gave^ and the Lord hath taken away ; blessed he the 
 name of the Lord.'' " 
 
 TO MRS. G. , ON THE DEATH OF HER HUSBAND. 
 
 "DearC , May 1849. 
 
 " I loved your precious mother, and now that you are 
 in trouble, my heart turns to you in this your hour of deep 
 sorrow. God had need of your dear partner, and has sent for 
 him home. He only lent him for a season ; and now look at 
 him where he is. Would he, if he could, return to this poor, 
 wicked world, and again take up that body of sin, and of 
 suffering, and of death? Think of him as a pure spirit in the 
 presence of God, at the feet of Jesus, mingling with that holy, 
 goodly company, your dear sainted mother among them, around 
 the throne. Much as he loved you, would he return ? And 
 now, dear C , fulfil your mission ; let your heart be com- 
 forted, and say to the Lord, * Here am I ; what wilt thou have 
 me to do? Be assured He will comfort and soothe your widowed 
 heart, and enable you to give it all to Him. He is a jealous 
 God, and covets the whole heart, and well does He deserve it. 
 Your dear husband never did for you what Jesus did. He 
 paid the full penalty due for all your sins, and now claims you 
 for His own. But still you have your work assigned you. 
 These little ones are given you to bring up for God. I would 
 comfort you with the comfort with which I myself have been 
 comforted of God. . . . And now only have I spoken of my- 
 self, but to lead your bleeding heart to the same rich source of 
 consolation. God is love, an ocean of love, nothing but love. 
 His tender, loving eye is upon you, and His loving heart is 
 towards you at this moment. Ask what ye will and it shall 
 he done unto you. See what a God and Father He is. He has 
 given you a work for Him ; and soon we shall all pass away, 
 and have done with sorrow and sin for ever. A thousand 
 times have I thanked the Lord for all my trials and afflictions. 
 I would not have been without them for worlds. They have 
 been messengers of boundless love and mercy to me and mine. 
 I do trust this will be your rich experience. ' 
 
 TO THE REV. J. H. E , ON HIS ILLNESS. 
 
 "My Beloved Brother, — October isth, 1845. 
 
 "The word in my heart at this moment is, 'Praise 
 
252 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 God from whom all blessings flow.' Yes, beloved, even your 
 trial, your present trial, shall be to the praise of His dear and 
 holy name. Be of good cheer, God has sent it ; it is a mes- 
 senger of love, — nothing but eternal, boundless, never-ending 
 love. The Lord sent you to preach glad tidings to poor, lost 
 sinners ; and to gather in His own sheep, feeding them in rich 
 pastures, and causing them to lie down beside the still waters. 
 But now He has closed your hps for a season. He who sent 
 you to preach, now bids you cease for a time, until again He 
 says, ' Go and preach the preaching that I bid thee.' Well, 
 beloved, is He not as full of love in all this as ever ? Just 
 the very same. Only trust Him for all consequences. He is 
 doing all things well. Leave yourself in His blessed hands, 
 and seek more for cheerful submission than for the removal of 
 the trial. Resignation will follow, and then, what a calm I 
 Oh, how soothing is the voice of our Beloved ! How it com- 
 forts and hushes the restless, agitated feelings to peace ! we 
 then lie quiet in His hands, and feel that His will must be best, 
 because He is God, and knows the end from the beginning, 
 while we know nothing. Dear, dear brother, let us rejoice 
 that you and I are in His loving hands, and leave ourselves 
 there. If He says to me, ' Be satisfied to be lame and a cripple 
 for the little remnant of your pilgrimage ; ' * and if he says to 
 you, ' You have preached My gospel, but now it is my will 
 that you be silent ;' what ! are we to think hardly or unkindly 
 of this ? How restless and earnest I was to be healed ; but 
 no healing came, until prompted by the Spirit to ask for suh- 
 mission; and in a moment it was given, and all was calm and 
 quiet within. And what then ? Li due season the cure most 
 unexpectedly came, and I was made whole. So may it be 
 with you, my tried brother. Be assured this affliction is sent 
 for some especial good, — for a great blessing to your soul, and 
 to the church at large. I would not now have been without 
 my trials, no, not for a thousand worlds. Oh, the goodness of 
 God was so richly displayed, that I have no power of language 
 to express it. Wondrous is He in His dealings with us, and 
 He is dealing with us every moment of our existence, and 
 we with Him. How little does the world know of the won- 
 drous transactions that are going on every instant between 
 lieaven and earth, — the unceasing intercourse between God 
 
 * The allusion is to a lameness, which for a time prevented her from 
 walking, and which threatened to render her decrepit for life. 
 
LETTERS OF CHRISTIAN SYMPATHY. 253 
 
 and His chosen and adopted family ! But why should I en- 
 large on a subject to you, who are so much better taught than 
 I am ? only you are now in the cloud, and I have just come 
 out of it, and can and may be allowed to speak a w^ord of 
 comfort to your tried soul. May the Lord comfort and guide 
 you in every step, and enable you to lie passive in His loving 
 hands." 
 
 TO MRS. H , ON THE DEATH OF HER HUSBAND. 
 
 " Dear Sister in Jesus, — January 9tb, 1853. 
 
 " I may say, too, in tribulation, for the Lord has writ- 
 ten you a widow indeed. Such are His loving dealings 
 towards those, one and all, whom the Father has given Him. 
 We must all pass through much tribulation to the kingdom He 
 has gone to prepare for us. Let us, then, take up the cross, 
 and follow hard after Him. A little while, and we shall be 
 there, and join all who have got there before us. Sweet 
 thought ! Oh, let us try and realize it. Heaven is not so far 
 off as we imagine. The world of spirits is all around us. 
 Absent from the body, we are present with the Lord. Dear 
 friend, I do trust this trial will draw you so sensibly near to 
 Jesus as to enable you to go on your way, realizing more and 
 more the gracious manifestations of the Lord to your wid- 
 owed spirit. Jesus is always near to you, listening to hear 
 what you would say to Him. Take Him now as your Hus- 
 band, Friend, and Brother, — that Brother born for your adver- 
 sity. Oh, is He not all that you could wish or desire ? Take 
 Him for your constant companion ; He will never fail you. 
 I feel my time here cannot, in the common course of nature, 
 be very long. But, as I draw nearer and nearer, heaven seems 
 to open with increasing attraction ; and the prospect of seeing 
 Jesus, that same Jesus that bore all my sins on the accursed 
 tree, and so many dear to me in the ties of nature, around 
 that glorious throne where Jesus sits, fills me with joy unspeak- 
 able and full of glory. It is all true. I can see afar off, as it 
 were ; the distance seems to vanish, and the realities of the 
 better world seem sensibly near. Oh, dear friend, live upon 
 your best Friend. There is nothing too small to carry to Jesus. 
 Abroad, at home, in company, or in the street, lift up your 
 heart, and tell Him all you feel and all you desire. Aim to 
 have constant communion with Him. Let Him not be long 
 out of your sight. Oh, to have to do with Jesus, and with 
 
254 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 Jesus only! Do not make up your mind to do aught before 
 you ask counsel from Him. The heart is deceitful, and will 
 lead us astray. Let us be very jealous over this inward foe, 
 and only consult our dearest and best Friend. . . . If it be 
 pleasant to have fellowship with the saints of the Lord in the 
 midst of much imperfection, what must it be when we get 
 home, and cluster altogether around the feet of Jesus, who 
 lived and died, and rose again for us ! Oh, help me to praise 
 Him ! You cannot think how often I take my walks above, 
 and how pleasant they are. It is so real. I seem to see so 
 many I have loved, and had fellowship with here, all around 
 the throne ; and to see that loving, tender, sympathizing Jesus, 
 who once was a man of sorrows, who bore my sins, paid all 
 my great debt, and ransomed my soul from the destroyer, — 
 now, in all His glory and infinite beauty, waiting to welcome 
 home every new-born soul. Oh, He is an ocean of love, — 
 nothing but love is in His dear heart towards you and me. 
 Who would not serve Him here that knows Him ? Follow 
 on, dear friend, to know more and more of Him. Keep up a 
 constant intercourse with Him. I hardly know how to stop, 
 my heart is so full. Pray for me, and may His sweetest bless- 
 ings be with you." 
 
 TO MR. W , ON THE DEATH OF HIS WIFE. 
 
 "... The Lord has laid His heavy hand upon you. All 
 is in love. May He open your eye to see it. He loves us 
 too well to afflict us without a need-be. When we get above, 
 we shall see how needful the chastening of Him who loves us, 
 for our preparation for the full enjoyment of that place He has 
 gone to prepare for us. Oh, what a change ! from earth to 
 heaven — from a suffering bed to a mansion of glory. You 
 are the sufferer ; but dry your tears, for home will come at 
 last, and may we receive from His own loving lips a Well 
 done^ good and faithful servant ; enter thou into the joy of thy 
 Lord. I feel for you, and pray you may be sustained and com- 
 forted of God. Jesus is very near. He is ordering all things 
 for you. He docs not willingly afflict us. It is to wean us 
 from a dying world and from ourselves. We too much grovel 
 here ; tlie Lord sees the encroachment of earthly ties, which 
 leave but half for Him. Let us, then, gird up the loins of 
 our mind, and make a fresh start for heaven. A crown of 
 glory awaits us. Jesus, the very same Jesus, is on the throne, 
 
LETTERS OF CHRISTIAN SYMPATHY. 255 
 
 as full of love, compassion, and sympathy as when a man of 
 sorrows here upon earth. And, although He has taken wife 
 and child from you, blessedly housing them near Himself, He 
 has not taken Himself, but is with you, and will comfort your 
 poor sorrowing heart. Soon you will meet again those you 
 love, and be for ever with the Lord. Oh, the glory that 
 awaits the Christian ! By all these painful dispensations He 
 is preparing us for the full enjoyment of that glory — glory 
 begun here — glory increasing throughout eternity. This 
 world is not worth a thought ; and we should ever bear in 
 mind, it is but a passage to a better. . . . Dear brother, 
 let this fresh trial, like a stormy gale, drive you nearer and 
 still nearer to Jesus. Make Him your all in alk Live upon 
 Him, and you may hve with Him even here upon earth. Oh, 
 it is a little taste of heaven below to enjoy the lifting up of 
 His own loving countenance. Covet these gracious manifesta- 
 tions of His presence to your soul. Heaven is all around us. 
 Angels are the Lord's messengers watching over every step. 
 Yes. 
 
 * The hour, the hour is hastening. 
 
 Spirit shall with spirit blend, 
 Frail mortality is wasting, 
 
 Then the secret all shall end. 
 
 ' Let, then, the thought hold sweet communion, 
 
 Let us breathe the mutual prayer ; 
 Till in heaven's eternal union 
 
 We meet with those we've loved while here.' 
 
 " May this season of sorrow draw you closer to his heart." 
 
 to an afflicted friend. 
 " My dear Friend, — 
 
 " The Lord has tried you of late, and I do feel anxious 
 to speak a word of comfort to you in this affliction. Those 
 whom He loves He invariably tries. The graces of the Spirit 
 are thus brought into holy exercise. Jesus is thereby hon- 
 oured, and our souls ascend a higher round in that ladder that 
 reaches from earth to heaven. We must sit at His feet, and 
 believe that He does all things well. What we know not now, 
 we shall know hereafter. The Judge of all the earth must do 
 right. Oh, let us cling closer and closer to Him than ever. 
 Let us make Him our all in all. Oh, to live for eternity ! 
 Eternity ! solemn thought ! The eye, the all-searching eye 
 
256 MEMOIR OP MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 of God IS upon us at this moment. May the constraining love 
 of Christ, the eternal love of the Father, and the sanctify- 
 ing love of the Holy Ghost, rest upon you, guide, and bless 
 you." 
 
 TO MISS E. W- 
 
 " Dear Friend, — April 1 6th. 
 
 "You are one of God's tried ones. The trial of your 
 faith is much more precious then gold, for it will appear in the 
 end that it was needful, and that you could not have done 
 without it. Do not think, because I have not written for some 
 time, that I have forgotten you. Ah, no ! You have often 
 been in my heart. 
 
 " Dear friend, this is our season for the trial of faith, and every 
 fresh trial, under the loving eye of Jesus, and sanctified by the 
 indwelling Spirit, is like a fresh gale wafting us nearer and 
 nearer to our port — to the place He has gone to prepare for 
 us. All these things work together for our prosperity of soul. 
 'Heaven is a prepared place, for a prepared people,' — the one 
 family of God. Oh, beloved, what must it be to be there ! 1 
 am now living on the verge of it. A few weary steps more, 
 and I shall be put into my possessions, all prepared by the 
 hand of eternal, unchanging love. "We shall never think when 
 we get there that we had one trial too many. "We shall see, 
 too, that we could not have done without one of them, for that 
 all were so many needful lessons to instruct us in a journey 
 through a wilderness full of temptation ; and that Infinite wis- 
 dom had chosen them for us. I know your trials are often 
 great, but the loving eye of Jesus is upon you, and your name 
 is deeply engraved upon His heart. Whom He loves He 
 loves unto death. I am near my eternal home. Jesus is very 
 precious and His presence is sensibly with me. I have at 
 times most precious glimpses of the glory of heaven, and of the 
 reality of the resurrection — of Jesus seated on the throne, look- 
 ing as full of pity, sympathy, and boundless love upon all the 
 weakest of His little flock, as when here below. He is just 
 the same now. Go to Him at once, dear friend, be your 
 trouble Avliat it may. Lift up your heart, though surrounded 
 with company, or sitting by your dear sick sister ; only raise 
 it, in silent breathing, and He will hear and answer. It will 
 be the prayer of faith — the faith of one who feels she has no 
 help but Jesus. May his sweetest, richest blessing rest upon 
 
LETTERS OF CHRISTIAN SYMPATHY. 257 
 
 you, my dear sister ; and if I see you no more here, I will 
 meet and welcome you above. 
 
 "P. S. — I live now more as a little helpless child (an infant) 
 upon Christ, than ever I did in my long hfe." 
 
 TO THE REV. B. P , AT A TIME OF SEVERE DOMESTIC 
 
 AFFLICTION. 
 
 " Leamington, Oct. 26th, 
 "Dear Brother in a precious Jesus, — 
 
 " One in Christ, and in the kingdom of tribulation, I 
 feel a desire to drop you a line, though personally unknown. 
 You are in trouble — this is enough — and having myself passed 
 through the same, I feel doubly anxious to speak a w^ord, if the 
 Lord permit, of comfort to your w^eary and tried spirit. It is 
 through much tribulation we are to enter the kingdom — how 
 true is this to every saint ! . . . Oh, dear brother, it is an 
 honour put upon a saint of God to be called to taste a little of 
 that sorrow through which Jesus, our Elder Brother, passed 
 for us. Deep, awful, and mysterious was His tribulation when 
 our heavy debt was laid upon His righteous soul. What we 
 are called to taste is but to refine and meeten us for the full 
 enjoyment of that place He has gone to prepare for us. Be it 
 so, Lord, only let our tribulation cause us to cling closer and 
 closer to Thyself. I am sure this will find an echo in your 
 soul. Submission to His loving will under trial He only can 
 give. In vain we try ourselves — our reasoning powers will 
 not avail us : our deceitful hearts will argue the point, and 
 leave us as far off its attainment as ever. We must go in all our 
 helplessness to Him who has said. Without Me ye can do 
 nothing. Dear brother, this you know better than I do. But 
 this I know, that when a storm comes upon us, often a mist is 
 cast before us by the enemy, and we cannot clearly see our 
 way ; then is the time to cast ourselves at the feet of Him who 
 is watching over us with a loving, sleepless eye. We are in 
 the furnace, but not alone ; the Son of God is with us, saying. 
 Be not afraid^ it is I. I have passed through deep, dark 
 waters, but I now feel that these things were sent for my good, 
 and I would not have been without His chastening for ten 
 thousand worlds, and you will have to declare the same. The 
 Lord deals with us with a view of causing us to know more of 
 His wondrous love, and the glorious mystery of fellowship with 
 his suffering. Jesus who loves us has ' done all things well,' 
 
258 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 and tliis we shall acknowledge before angels and men. I should 
 never have known so much the tender sympathy, gentleness, 
 and matchless love that there is in the heart of Jesus, nor have 
 enjoyed so much union and communion with Him, or the inter- 
 change of a holy recognition, but for His dealings. . . . 
 The Holy Spirit is given since Jesus came to restore, in a 
 measure, the sensible presence of a good and gracious Father 
 to His children. And those who walk closely with God are 
 permitted to hear His voice, evermore speaking to them by 
 the Spirit within. Great is the mystery of godliness ! Oh, to 
 hold fast our oneness with Jesus ! To come with an open 
 heart, in all our helplessness, and tell Him all. Is not this a 
 mighty privilege for a poor, helpless sinner ? What need we 
 fear when He invites us to cast our burden upon Him who is 
 able to bear our burden and sustain us too ? We want more 
 childlike simplicity in obeying the commands of Christ. Soon 
 we pass away to our heavenly inheritance, and then we shall 
 see all the way He led us through the wilderness was the right 
 way, and that not one trial or cross could have been dispensed 
 with. Forgive me for troubling you Avith this, written amidst 
 much interruption ; but the Lord laid you on my heart, and I 
 could not refrain from telling you so. 
 
 Accompanying the preceding and touching letter, addressed 
 to an honourable servant of Christ, was a copy of the following 
 exquisite lines on Christian sympathy, for which she might 
 have sat as the original to the gifted author : — 
 
 " Must I my brother keep, 
 
 And share his pains and toil; 
 And weep witli those that weep, 
 
 And smile with those that smile? 
 And act to each a brother's part, 
 And feel his sorrows in my heart ? 
 
 " Must I his burden bear, 
 
 As though it were my own, 
 And do as I would care 
 
 Should to myself be done ; 
 And faithful to his interests prove, 
 And as myself my neighbour love ? 
 
 •' Must T reprove his sin, 
 
 Must I partake his grie^ 
 And kiudl}' enter in 
 
 And minister relief; 
 The naked clothe, the hungry feed, 
 And love him not in word, but deed? 
 
DIARY. 259 
 
 " Then, Jesus, at thy feet 
 A student let me be, 
 And learn, as it is meet, 
 
 My duty. Lord, of Thee : 
 For thou didst come on mercy's plan, 
 And all thy life was love to man. 
 
 " Oh, make me as Thou art, 
 
 Thy Spirit, Lord, bestow ; 
 The kind and gentle heart 
 
 That feels another's woe, 
 Tliat thus I may be like my Head, 
 And in my Saviour's footsteps tread."* 
 
 Sucli are a few specimens — culled from an extensive corres- 
 pondence — of lier letters of Christian sympathy. The thoughts 
 and feelings they so glowingly express welled up from a heart 
 trained in that most blessed and instructive of all schools — 
 sanctified sorrow. Her posture while penning them would 
 seem to have been that of the ' disciple whom Jesus loved,' — 
 leaning upon the bosom of her Lord ; or, to quote her own 
 expressive words, ' taking her walks above,' and dating as 
 from the borders of the Celestial City. Comforted herself by 
 Jesus, she sought to lead all who were in any trouble to the 
 same divine source of consolation. From heartfelt experience 
 she could say, " Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good !" 
 Again we ask, What, though this Avere her only gift, where, 
 in the Church of Christ, is there one more rare or more pre- 
 cious ? And yet what Christian, whose consolation has 
 abounded by Christ, may not go and do likewise ? Who that 
 has a wound healed by the Saviour's sympatliy, may not gen- 
 tly lead another bleeding heart to Him ? It is thus we aid Him 
 in His mission of love to our world. We recur again to her 
 Diary. 
 
 "April 23rd. — Surely I have seen an end of all perfection 
 both in myself and in others. But, oh, there is One, and only 
 one, and He is perfect. The Lord be praised for this ! The 
 goodness, the long-suffering, the loving-kindness of God sur- 
 passes our conceptions. Eternity only can unfold it to us, and 
 we shall be even there learning it out for ever and ever. O 
 Lord Jesus, make me holy — sanctify me for Thyself Fill me 
 with Thyself, that I may know what it is to be filled with all 
 the fulness of God. Sanctify me, body, soul, and spirit." 
 
 * Rev. Dr. Raffles. 
 
260 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 " 27th. — When disappointed in the creature, I take refuge 
 at once in Jesus. I run to Him, and find Him all my heart 
 could wish. Oh, how precious is a throne of grace to my soul 
 — a meeting-place between a holy God and a poor sinner, 
 sprinkled with the blood of His dear Son, and ever a verdant 
 spot, inviting a poor, needy, trembling sinner at all times and 
 under all circumstances. Lord, how could I live without 
 Thee? Thou art my all in all! my comfort, my joy, my 
 peace, my strengthener, my home for time and eternity." 
 
 "30th. — How intricate is often the believer's way! So 
 hedged up that He cannot discern a single step before him. 
 All is dark. He here and there goes too often to the creature 
 for counsel, and, perhaps, for sympathy, but finds all but broken 
 cisterns. But Jesus is at hand — a Fountain of living waters, 
 ever ready to impart all comfort, wisdom, and direction. But, 
 oh, how slow to approach this Fountain! How base and un- 
 grateful the heart, and wretched the unbelief that still lurks 
 within, ever leading us away from Him who is a present help 
 in every time of need. Take up thy rest, oh, my soul, in Him 
 who hath loved thee with an everlasting love, and will love 
 thee unto the end !" 
 
 " There is a voice— it comes to me 
 On memory's happy wing, 
 When doubts and dark despondency 
 
 Their fearful shadows fling ; 
 ' I am thy Helper, I thy Friend, 
 I'm with thee always to the end.' 
 
 " When trials came, and threat'ning ill, 
 And dearest comforts fled, 
 I look'd above to Zion's hill, 
 
 And the blest promise sped, 
 To soothe my heart, to chase my fear, 
 ' I'm with thee always — I am near.' 
 
 " When duties press'd with heavy weight 
 
 Upon ray bosom sore, 
 My pathway seemed more dark and strait. 
 
 I lieard the voice before — 
 ' Take up my cross and follow me, 
 Soon thou shalt my salvation see.' 
 
 " And when the spoiler's cruel dart 
 
 Had toudi'd my fairest flowers. 
 Dear, cherish'd objects of my heart. 
 
 And sadd'ning all my hours. 
 The voice then came so small and still, 
 It bow'd me to Jehovah's will. 
 
DIARY. 261 
 
 " 'Twas dark upon life's rugged sea. 
 And friends who once did shine 
 In days of fair prosperity, 
 
 I could not claim as mine ; 
 One then replied, ' I am thy Friend, 
 I'm with thee always to the end.' 
 
 "And oft when sickness, feverish pain, 
 
 Came with relentless power, 
 Methought I heard the voice again, 
 
 Sustaining in that hour ; 
 * I am thy Saviour, I thy Friend, 
 I will be with thee to the end.' 
 
 " And when the strife of death comes near, 
 And darkly rolls cold Jordan's wave, 
 
 I'll look to yonder brighter sphere, 
 To Him who has the power to save. 
 
 Oh ! may I trust Him to the end. 
 The sinner's everlasting Friend !" 
 
CHAPTER XII. 
 
 True religion, as we have had occasion to remark, is essen- 
 tially experimental in its nature. Find it delineated where 
 we may — in the sacred volume, or in the uninspired records of 
 the saints of God — its nature, its phases, and its effects are 
 identically the same. Who can trace the histories of Abra- 
 ham, of Moses, and of Job — read the psalms of David — glide 
 along the enchanting stream of prophetic truth — listen to the 
 discourses of Jesus — peruse the letters of His apostles, or catch 
 the last tones of inspiration as they float from the lonely Isle 
 of Patmos, and not feel that true Christianity is nothing less 
 than the life of Jesus dwelling in the soul of the believer ? 
 But Christian experience varies ; it may be more strongly de- 
 veloped in some individuals than in others. One believer may 
 present a more robust type of this essential characteristic of 
 Christianity than another. It is not, perhaps, difficult to ac- 
 count for this difference. He may have been more an object 
 of God's especial dealings, and consequently he has had closer 
 dealings with God. He may have been more variedly tried, 
 more heavily afflicted, more frequently chastened ; he may 
 have been led into a deeper insight into his own heart ; he 
 may have been permitted more thoroughly to learn his native 
 vileness and weakness, and by a process most painful and 
 humiliating ; he has had more to do with providential dispen- 
 sations — he can tell of bhghted hopes, of disappointed schemes, 
 of withered flowers, of broken cisterns ; he has become more 
 closely acquainted with God ; has learnt more of Jesus, has 
 kept a closer eye upon the hidden work of the Spirit in the 
 heart ; and thus, by these varied processes, he has become a 
 more deeply sjnritual and experimental Christian, Of this class 
 Avas the honoured subject of our memoir. Christian experi- 
 ence, in some of its most holy, lovely, and touching unfoldings, 
 was pre-eminent in her rehgious hfe and correspondence. Not 
 [262] 
 
CHRISTIAN EXPERIENCE. 263 
 
 merely do we trace it in the recorded exercises of her own 
 soul, but also in the intense, holy concern she felt and ex- 
 pressed for the religious progress of others. To the illustra- 
 tions already given, a few more are added, gleaned alike from 
 her private journal, and her general correspondence. The fol- 
 lowing touching resume of past experience is taken from her 
 diary. 
 
 "'Faint yet pursuing,' is my present motto. Hitherto has 
 the Lord been with me, and so far has He brought me on my 
 eventful journey. On looking back, I have much to mourn 
 over, and I have much to be thankful for, — mercy and good- 
 ness, faithfulness and boundless love, have followed me every 
 step of the way. The Lord has gently and tenderly led me 
 on. Once, and but once, He laid His hand sorely upon me. 
 But it was the rod of the ' covenant, ordered in all things and 
 sure.' It pressed heavily. I could not discern a Father's 
 hand. Overwhelmed, almost stunned, Avith the suddenness of 
 the affliction, I lost my hold and confidence in Him who had 
 said, '■He ivould never leave nor forsake 7??e.' The enemy seemed 
 to sift me as wheat. Bereaved of an affectionate husband — 
 deprived of fortune — friends far away — in a strange land, 
 heart-broken and alone — while the pitiless storm raged over 
 me, I would steal away and weep in secret agony. Such was 
 my state and such my misery, when the Lord sent a man of 
 God to me with a message of love to my soul. He spoke of 
 the unalterable love of Jesus, and of His never-failing com- 
 passion, even while He chastened. He opened up and unfolded 
 the precious truths of the gospel with such power accompany- 
 ing every word, that I once more raised my head, and lifted 
 up my heart to God as my Father still ; who though He had 
 chastened me, yet His anger was turned away, and I was 
 comforted. Many, since then, have been the trials I have had 
 to pass through, but the Lord has stood by me, and delivered 
 me out of them all. Strength has been given to me equal to 
 my day. The precept was laid upon my heart, Owe no man 
 anything ; and I have been enabled to walk in that precept, 
 and God has fulfilled the promise. Your bread shall be given 
 you, and your luater shall be sure. I was led to walk by faith 
 in an unseen Protector, Provider, and Friend. I never went 
 to bed owing anything but love. I repaired to God for all I 
 wanted, feeling I w^as His child and doubly so as his w^idowed 
 child. As such, I called upon Him in every time of need for 
 
264 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 counsel in difficulty, for strength in weakness, for healing in 
 sickness, for supplies of grace to uphold and keep me near 
 Himself, my best, my only Friend on earth and in heaven. 
 He never, no, never failed me. His ear was ever open to my 
 cry, and His love shed abroad in my heart, was my joy and 
 my comfort by day and by night. My children are grown up 
 — some are walking among those that fear His name ; and I 
 still pray and believe that the promise will be fulfilled which 
 He gave me in the early days of my lonely widowhood — / ivill 
 he a Father to thy fatherless children. How can He be a Father, 
 and one be lost ? Not so, Lord, for Thy word shall never fail 
 of all that Thou hast put Thy name to." 
 
 ''How is it with Thee now, my soul? Is thy God still 
 gracious, and art thou yet upheld and comforted ? Has old 
 age overtaken thee, and thy pains thickened upon thee, and is 
 thy God still faithful to His promise ? Yes, oh yes ! He is 
 all and everything He has said He would be. He is my joy 
 by night and by day. My comfort in sorrow — my stay in 
 trouble — my strength in weakness — the lifter up of my head, 
 and my portion for ever. God be praised ! God be praised ! " 
 
 " Still, I have cause to praise and bless the God of my sal- 
 vation, and the God of all my comforts. ' His loving-kindness, 
 oh, how great!' I am, however, still called to fight, to watch 
 and pray. The world with its cares, unbelief with its fears, 
 and Satan ever on the watch to tempt, harass, and allure : and 
 yet, in the midst of it all, the Lord indulges me with much 
 nearness to Himself, and a subdued heart at a throne of grace. 
 I pray, and praise, and weep before Him, and feel He is my 
 Father in heaven. Jesus is precious. I felt to-day as if I 
 could say I loved Him better than all created beings, however 
 near and dear to me. But, while thus pouring out my heart 
 to Him, I tliought of poor Peter, and remembered how httle 
 he knew of his own heart when he said so boldly that he was 
 willing to lay down his life for his beloved Master. I acknowl- 
 edged my inability to do better than Peter, but could say, 
 I did desire to love Him supremely from my very heart, and to 
 prefer His love to every other love beside." 
 
 "February 28th. — This day I am nearly three-score years 
 and ten, and during that period the Lord has borne with my 
 manners in the wilderness, while goodness and mercy have 
 followed me all the way. What shall I do, or what can I say 
 to Thee, thou God of love ! Oh, for a heart filled with grace. 
 
DIARY. 265 
 
 that I may make some little return for sucn an ocean of good- 
 ness ! But no, I must still come a poor, needy, unworthy 
 sinner to the throne of grace. The dust is my proper place ; 
 there must I lie. But a little space may now be left me ; my 
 journey may soon come to an end. How glorious does the 
 gospel appear to my soul ! It just suits my case. Blessed be 
 the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ for His unspeakable gift. 
 And oh, the thought, that if I had been the only sinner on the 
 face of the earth to be saved. He must have died — He must 
 have been that Man of sorrows — He must have sunk down to 
 the utmost depth of degradation — He must have grappled with 
 death, hell, and the grave — He must have shed every drop of 
 that rich blood that cleanseth from all sin, ere I could have 
 entered the kingdom of heaven ! Oh, then, how vile am I to 
 serve Him so ill, and make so few returns of love for such an 
 ocean ! God knows it is my desire to love Him supremely, to 
 live to Him, and to live for Him, and Him only. But oh, this 
 heart of mine ! what can I do with it ? Lord help me ! Help 
 one that is willing to be helped, and looks alone to Thee for 
 that help she so much needs." 
 
 "I felt humbled at what passed last evening — too much 
 trifling conversation. I do hope the Lord did bring me to His 
 footstool this morning with a broken heart. I think there is 
 more danger in being with lukewarm professors than with the 
 unconverted. I shed many tears, and abhorred myself before 
 Him. Oh, the exquisite tenderness, compassion, and long- 
 suffering of Jesus towards such a one ! Oh, for more wisdom, 
 discretion, and the power of the Spirit within ! Blessed be His 
 holy name, for every precious promise He has left to encour- 
 age our souls in this incessant warfare. Trying it often is ; 
 there is no other help but to run to Jesus, and the Fountain 
 opened for sin. It is there we get the broken and contrite 
 heart, and fresh strength to go on in spite of all that opposes 
 us in our progress homewards. Lord, strengthen Thy poor, 
 aged, feeble one, and keep me moment by moment, as in the 
 hollow of Thy hand. Leave me not to dishonour Thee in old 
 age. Hitherto Thou hast upheld me, and not suffered me out- 
 w^ardly to dishonour Thee. Thine holy eyes have seen enough 
 to cast me off for ever ; but oh, for ever blessed be Thy name, 
 though Thou hast in some measure rebuked and chastened, 
 and caused me to see and lament my sin, Thou hast kept my 
 secrets within Thine own loving bosom, thou most precious 
 12 
 
266 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 Son of God. This it is that breaks my heart, and causes tears 
 to run down my aged cheeks. Wliat, oh what shall I render 
 unto Thee for Thy wondrous goodness and patience towards 
 me ? Nothing have I to render. I am poor and needy, and 
 dependent upon Thee moment by moment. God be praised 
 for such a Sav.iour, just suited in every way to my necessities. 
 Oh, for a heart to praise and bless His holy holy name!" 
 
 " There is, in the Christian mind, such a proneness to be 
 satisfied with a little. No pressing onward and upward. We 
 receive a little, and then sit down and live upon it until it is 
 all exhausted, and our very bones stand out from leanness. 
 We forget, that the oftener we apply for more, the more wel- 
 come we are, and the holier and happier we become ; and not 
 only this, but the more we receive, the more we feel our need 
 of deeper supplies, grow in grace, and in the knowledge of our 
 Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. We need to know more of 
 Jesus. The more frequently we go to Him, the better Ave shall 
 know Him. Always welcome. Never will He frown a poor 
 beggar from His footstool. He upbraids us for not coming. 
 Ye will not come unto Me. Why should our grace droop, and 
 languish, and die, when we can repair to the Fountain of living 
 water, at all times and under all circumstances? Oh, the 
 blessing of having such an Almighty Friend in glory, waiting 
 to be gracious to us, whose power is infinite in heaven and on 
 earth, and whose love, like Himself, is from everlasting to 
 everlasting ! " 
 
 " It is a lovely day. Experienced a precious nearness to 
 Jesus in prayer. Felt I loved Him above all earthly love ; 
 that to me He was the chiefest among ten thousand, and alto- 
 gether lovely to my soul. Could recall all His tender dealing, 
 watchful providence, unwearied care, all-protecting hand, from 
 infancy to the present moment. I delight to trace before Him 
 His wondrous, unwearied love, in His providence all my jour- 
 ney through. Oh, what a God has He been — and what returns? 
 Often the basest. How humbling is this ! How often does 
 the remembrance of what He has been to me, and what I have 
 been to Him, bring tears to my eyes." 
 
 "What a grief it is to me to see those professing Christ, and 
 yet living to the world. If ye love the ivoi'ld,, the love of the 
 Father is not in you. Oh that all this evil might be subdued 
 in me ! Truly can I say, in my flesh dwelleth no good thing. 
 Lord, put thoughts in my heart, and suitable words in my 
 
DIARY. 267 
 
 mouth, that I may speak to sinners — one word followed with 
 Thy blessing ! Only make me a humble instrument of some 
 good where I am. Dear Lord, wilt Thou condescend to use 
 me for Thyself, and for the good of those around me ? Often 
 am I afraid of speaking, lest I should do more harm than good 
 by exciting the enmity of the carnal mind. Lord, when I 
 would do good, evil is present with me. Help me. I am 
 Thine, and Thou art mine ! Oh, thou blessed Spirit of all 
 grace, truth, and power, work that in me that shall be for Thy 
 glory, and the good of poor dying souls. Never did I more 
 feel my incompetency to do anything, or to speak a word for 
 Christ. I can talk to those who love Thee, and enjoy it ; but 
 faithfully and fearlessly to speak to and warn the empty pro- 
 fessor and the unrenewed sinner, I shrink from it. Precious 
 and beloved Jesus, help and strengthen Thine unworthy one 
 in doing what is right in Thy sight." 
 
 "Oct. 1st. — The Lord has brought me in safety to town 
 through His tender and never-ceasing mercy. What thanks 
 do I owe Him for His watchful providence over me moment 
 by moment. Among other blessings would I praise Him for 
 the affection and devoted love of my children. I have paid 
 the three in the country each a visit ; and never did a mother 
 meet with more tenderness and love — anticipating my every 
 wish, and watching over me as a nurse her tender babe. God 
 be praised for all His unmerited favours." 
 
 " I cannot see God for one moment out of Christ. I behold 
 Him in all His glorious attributes in Jesus, the Son of His love. 
 He that hath seen Me hath seen the Father. I often feel, in 
 drawing near the throne of grace, I need a Father's pity. I go 
 to Him as my Father. At other times I feel I need all the 
 sympathy and tender compassion of Christ's manhood. And, 
 again, I feel I need the poAver of the Holy Ghost within me, 
 to teach, to sanctify, and to heal. Thus a Triune Jehovah is 
 made known to us through Jesus. And these three — Father, 
 Son, and Holy Ghost — are, one and all, engaged in the glori- 
 ous work of saving fallen sinners. God be praised for what 
 we do know. God be praised !" 
 
 " Had precious nearness to-day in pleading for my children 
 — much sweet, holy liberty in prayer. Oh, how blessed are 
 these opportunities, when heaven seems opened, and God re- 
 veals the love of His heart, and His willingness to do all we 
 ask! Felt, too, much brokenness of heart, under a deep sense 
 
268 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 of my unworthiness of such unbounded love. It is a great 
 comfort to me to think that the Lord knows me altogether. I 
 would have no concealments from Him. He graciously per- 
 mits me to come with an open heart." 
 
 "0 Lord, my God, bring salvation to my house again. 
 Make bare Thine holy arm. Remember Thy gracious promise 
 given to Thine handmaid in the time of her deep sorrow. For 
 ever blessed be Thy name for the consolation then afforded 
 her, and for what Thou hast so wonderfully accomplished. 
 But, dear Lord, there is yet to be a fulfilment of Thine own 
 
 precious word. Remember, too, in great mercy. Lord, . 
 
 Open Thou his eyes to behold himself a sinner in Thy sight, 
 and Thyself able to save to the uttermost. Oh, lay him low in 
 the dust of self-abhorrence at Thy dear feet, there to sue for 
 pardon through that precious blood that can alone cleanse from 
 sin. Have mercy ere he goes hence ; and may he leave a 
 testimony behind him to the precious fulness of Thy great sal- 
 vation." 
 
 " Unto the upright there ariseth light in the darkness. Oh, to 
 walk with an open, unveiled heart w4th God. To have no 
 concealments, not the shadow of a wish to conceal ; but rather 
 rejoice that He who loves us knows us altogether just as we 
 are. He alone can heal all our diseases, and help all our infirm- 
 ities. He has graciously undertaken to meeten us for that 
 place He has gone to prepare for us. What a Saviour is ours ! 
 God be praised for His unspeakable gift." 
 
 " How utterly impossible for me to choose for myself. This 
 is the second time in my life, w^hen in the providence of God, 
 I have had to decide upon a point of some moment, and which 
 might lead to important results. I have carried it again and 
 again to the Lord, but to this moment no hght has shone upon 
 my way. I think I feel willing to have no wish to determine 
 for myself. I do desire that the Avill of the Lord should be 
 done in me. Precious Jesus, my Guide, my Guardian, my un- 
 ceasing Friend, undertake for me. Still I am to walk by faith 
 through the wilderness." 
 
 " I believe that every word of God is only profitable as it is 
 wrought out in the soul, often by trying providences. Head 
 knowledge will not do. Hearing with the outward ear profits 
 not the soul. It makes no headway towards heaven, and 
 knows nothing of the love of Christ, or the real character of 
 God. The truth as it is in Jesus is more known in one deep 
 
DIARY. 269 
 
 trial than in years of smooth saihng. Worldly prosperity is 
 unfavourable soil for the true Christian to grow in. It benumbs 
 the soul, and nothing but tlie Almighty power of God can 
 keep it from the sleep of death." 
 
 " My posture is still waiting upon God. To know His will 
 is my chief desire. Be still, and knoio that I am God. These 
 words were applied to my soul to-day with much sweetness. 
 I think, small crosses stir up the corruptions of the heart more 
 than deep afflictions. The flesh frets ; pride is set in motion ; 
 and at once the soul is called to conflict with a host of enemies 
 that lie dormant until roused to strive against the Spirit. Sa- 
 tan, then is busy, and the soul has, with all speed, to betake 
 itself to its stronghold. Oh, it is then the throne of grace is a 
 blessed resource. Jesus is most precious." 
 
 " Blessed, thrice blessed, is the prospect of eternal companion- 
 ship in heaven with those from whom we differ in judgment 
 upon earth." 
 
 " What a brittle thing is all the glory, wealth, and honour 
 of this vain world ! How empty and what trash does it ap- 
 pear ! And yet men sell their souls to grasp it, and at last 
 pass away from it and find it all a phantom. How unceasing 
 is Satan in for ever bringing it before our eyes, in some form 
 or other." 
 
 "How much stronger faith it requires to go to the Lord in 
 our little difficulties than when greater troubles press us. I 
 feel, at times, almost ashamed to bring my small trials, and feel 
 as if it required an apology. But, oh, in a moment I am helped, 
 at such a season of temptation, to prostrate myself before the 
 Lord, and humble myself for the pride of my wretched heart ; 
 for it is that, aided by the enemy, that creates the suggestion. 
 In one sense, all our circumstances are trifles in the sight of a 
 great Almighty God ; but if Christ hath said that tlie very 
 hairs of our head are numbered, how much more does He con- 
 descend to care for what is a trouble to us." 
 
 The following presents the " child of the light walking in 
 darkness." This was not often her dreary path ; but when so, 
 like her blessed Saviour on the cross, her faith never relin- 
 quished its hold on God. 
 
 " March 6th. — Good and gracious has been the Lord to me 
 in all outward comforts ; but my soul has been led to walk in 
 a dark way, and although I do feel Jesus more precious than 
 ever, I have not that abiding enjoyment of His presence as 
 
270 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 formerly. I am greatly straitened in myself, and particularly 
 in fomily prayer am greatly tried. My niind is confused, and 
 my memory tails me, and the presence of so many becomes a 
 snare to me, that I feel I am sinning in attempting to address 
 the heart searching God in such a state of mind. The Lord, 
 the Spirit, has withdrawn His sensible presence, and my soul 
 has been in great trouble. I search for the cause, and the 
 more I search, the plainer I see great cause indeed wherefore 
 He should leave my soul to barrenness and wandering. Sure- 
 ly, I have followed Him of late like sorrowful Mary, and 
 would cry. Oh, that it were with me as in days that are past ! 
 And yet, Jesus is not out of sight, and I feel that the wealth 
 of ten thousand worlds could not compensate for the loss of the 
 light of His countenance. I feel, at times, that I am His, and 
 that He is mine ; l)ut still there is a want in my soul that He 
 only can meet. Lord, help me, and revive Thy work for 
 Jesus' sake. I never before had such wrestling with God, and 
 never before walked in such a dark, bewildering way. Lord, 
 show me the why and the wherefore. Subdue my sins, give 
 me deep repentance, and set my soul once more at happy, holy 
 liberty." 
 
 " 20th. — Bless the Lord, who has heard the voice of my 
 supplication, and though He bore long with me, has again 
 spoken peace and comfort to my troubled, tempest-tossed soul. 
 My soul rejoices in God my Saviour, in whom is all my hope 
 and my salvation.'' 
 
 Let those who fear the Lord, who are walking in darkness 
 and have no light, be encouraged to trust in the Lord. 
 " Light is sow}i for the righteous, and gladness for the upright 
 in heart." VTe propose following these extracts from her 
 private papers with selections from her general correspondence, 
 as still further illustrating the experimental character of true 
 godliness. 
 
 TO LADY B . ox THE SEALING OF THE SPIRIT. 
 
 "Dear Lady B , Leamingtou. March 17th. 
 
 " . . . . How poor and trilling is everything else, 
 compared with the glory of God in the salvation of His saints — 
 in their well-being and their progress homeward. It is a certain 
 thing, that there is no standing still in our heavenly course. 
 T^^e have too many enemies to contend with to allow of this. 
 'We have need, indeed, of all the help we can obtain from 
 
THE SEALING OF THE SPIRIT. 271 
 
 above and below, to keep our feet from falling, and our heart 
 steadfast in the way to glory. "What is all the pomp, and 
 wealth, and rank of this poor fieetiiig world, in contrast with 
 the glory that shall soon be revealed in all them that love His 
 appearing ? In whom also after yc believed ye were sealed with 
 that Holy Spirit of jjrojiiise w'hich is the earnest of ovr inheri- 
 tance. Eph. i. 13, 14. This passage of Scripture is very 
 precious, and it is mosr important that we should be experi- 
 nienially and practically acquainted with it. It is not peculiar 
 to the apostles and the disciples of old ; but it belongs to you 
 and to me, and it should be a question of great moment to us 
 both ? Have I been sicaled with the Holy Spirit of promise ? 
 Have I the witness in my soul that I am a child of God ? 
 Plave I really believed, and am I thus scaled as an heir of 
 God, and a joint-heir with Christ Jesus? Have I made my 
 calling and election sure to myself? Oh, are not these im- 
 portant questions to put to ourselves, particularly when we 
 know not how soon we may be called to render in an account 
 to God ? One step and we are there — in the very presence 
 of a holy, heart-searching Jehovah. Is there anything upon 
 earth of equal importance to this? Earnestly, then, would I 
 urge you to press onward ; and if yet unacquainted with the 
 sealing of the Spirit, which is the earnest of your heavenly 
 inheritance, to go again and again until you obtain it. It is 
 for you. It is the certain pledge of God's eternal, unchange- 
 able love to your soul. Oh, do but try for it. Though faint 
 at first, it will increase more and more. It is the image of 
 Christ stamped upon the soul of His redeemed one. Oh, to 
 know this precious Jesus is life eternal. The world is passing 
 away, and we are passing away, but this will never pass away. 
 I feel as if standing on the very verge of the eternal world — 
 full in view before me — and I cannot but say to all I love, The 
 Bible is true — God is true — Jesus is true — all that He has 
 said is true. He stands ready to receive, to pardon, to sanc- 
 tify, and to SEAL as His own, all who come to Him, and has 
 promised that He will cast out none that come. I should like 
 to hear that all is well with you, and that you are making pro- 
 gress heavenward, homeward, and that Jesus is increasingly 
 precious to your soul. Oh, I do love the saints. I have this 
 one evidence that I have passed from death unto life, because I 
 love the brethren. All who love Christ, I love. And I shall 
 love them even better when I get above. Heaven's atmos- 
 
272 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 phere is love. Christ's heart is an ocean of love. Let us 
 endeavour to have as much as we can of heaven in our souls 
 while here. 'We have but a brief space left to show our love 
 to Christ. Let us work for Him, live for Him, live to Him, 
 and look forward to living with Him. There is such a thing 
 as a most blessed fellowship and communion with the Saviour. 
 I once heard Mr. Evans say, 'there were some professors of 
 religion who did not know when the Lord was Avith them, 
 or when He was not.' Is not this a most painful truth ? 
 Oh, how can these walk happily or holily in such a state of 
 soul? . . ." 
 
 TO THE SAME. ON A SPIRITUAL MINISTRY, 
 
 "Your pastor has been obliged again to leave you; but oh, 
 what a mercy, although the under-shepherd is away, the Chief, 
 faithful Shepherd never leaves his flock. How much the soul 
 needs the constant supplies of spiritual food to sustain it in 
 health and vigour ! Christ is the bread of the spiritual life, 
 and Christ is the sum and substance of the gospel ; and there- 
 fore the gospel is needful, that we may grow in grace. And 
 
 now, dear friend, you will be Avithout it at , I fear. Your 
 
 work, then, is before you. ' Ask anything in My name, and 
 it shall be done unto you.' You want the gospel ; it is more 
 needful for you than your necessary food ; you want it for 
 yourself, for those you love, for the poor around you. I do not 
 urge you to wander, seeking an under-shepherd that you think 
 will suit ; but I do say, go to Jesus, to the compassionate, the 
 Chief Shepherd, and ask Him to send you one after His own 
 heart. Do not be satisfied with going once, or twice, or 
 thrice, but go, and continue to go, taking no denial. The 
 Lord loves importunity. A greater blessing God could not 
 send you than this. You will honour Him by asking, and He 
 will honour you by giving. If the man that comes does not 
 preach Christ from first to last — if he puts anything else in as 
 a substitute — God has not sent him. Then go and tell the 
 Lord. Oh, let this be a grand transaction l^etween God and 
 yourself. . . . ." 
 
 TO THE SAME. ON CONFORMITY TO THE WORLD. 
 
 " What a difficult matter it is to be in the world, and yet 
 not to be of the world ! Our Lord has said of his disciples, 
 They are not of the world, even as I am not of the world. Christ 
 
CONFORMITY TO THE WORLD. 273 
 
 himself carried out this principle. He passed through the 
 world as one who was not of it. Oh, that we could but 
 imitate His holj example, and aim onlj, while in it, so to let 
 our light shine, that others may take knowledge of us that we 
 have been with Jesus, and have learned of Him. It should 
 be our whole endeavour to do all the good we can in it and 
 for it, and yet to set at nought its spirit, its principles, and its 
 maxims. ' How can this be ?' I think I hear you say. Go 
 to Jesus, and ask of Him strength for any duty that devolves 
 upon us. Without Me ye can do nothing. And yet with 
 Christ strengthening us, we can do all things. What a 
 present helper is Jesus ! When we are called to go amongst 
 those who know not God, let it be from an absolute duty, and 
 with a desire only to do good to their souls, and after much 
 prayer — honest, sincere prayer — to be preserved from evil. 
 Oh, how much need have we to watch over our hearts, and 
 ask the Lord to purify our motives in all that we do ! We 
 have need to keep close to our dearest, our best Friend, and 
 beseech Him to save us from ourselves. How can a believer 
 walk through this world safely and securely, but as he is up- 
 held by a strength that is Omnipotent ?....! am passing 
 through a world lying in the wicked one. I belong to an- 
 other kingdom, wliich is not of this world. I am a subject of 
 the kingdom of Christ ; hence it is my duty and my high 
 privilege to obey and to serve. And, oh. His service is no 
 slavery ; it is perfect freedom. Dear friend, see, then, our 
 high calling ! He has called you and me to come out of the 
 world and to be separate, in principle, in practice, in heart. I 
 once sat by the bedside of a dying saint. She had devoted 
 her life to the Lord, and no one could say but that she walked 
 as a believer should walk. But, oh, her great grief, when she 
 was about to appear before Him was, that she had lived too 
 much to the world. Her sorrow was great ; and, although she 
 expressed no fear as to her acceptance in Christ, yet, on look- 
 ing back upon her past life, she saw so much to deplore of 
 heart-departures^ that her sorrow in this respect obscured, in a 
 measure, her prospect of the endless glory that doubtless 
 awaited her, and which, I believe, she is now enjoying with 
 Him she loved — ' chosen in Christ before the foundation of 
 the world !' . . ." 
 12* 
 
274 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 TO A BELOVED FRIEND. ON LOOKING TO JESUS FOR 
 
 EVIDENCES. 
 
 "Dear and beloved Friend, — Tuesday Evenino-. 
 
 "I have just returned from service, and found your 
 kind letter. Many, many thanks. I have long wished to 
 write and inquire how it was with your soul, which, I believe, 
 is as dear to Christ as the apple of His eye. . . . Precious 
 friend, look full at Jesus. Look no longer to your own weak, 
 sinful heart. Look ujjon Me, and he ye saved. Only believe^ 
 and you shall have eternal life. It is the record God has given 
 of His dear Son we are called to believe ; and the moment you 
 believe this with all your heart, you have peace. All your 
 trouble arises from your looking for evidences within ; and 
 when Satan blinds your eye, and you cannot find them, direct- 
 ly you think you have no part or lot in this matter. Your 
 salvation does not hinge in the slightest degree upon what is 
 done in you or by you, but what Christ has done for sinners ; 
 and if you are a sinner, then Christ has done it for you. Oh, 
 look and live ! Keep your eye upon Jesus. Try and realize 
 the simple, plain, matter-of-fact truth that God was in Christ 
 Jesus ! that He came into the world for the express purpose 
 of saving sinners, the vilest of the vile ; and that He rose from 
 the dead, and is now above, at the right hand of the Father, 
 to fulfil every promise he has left in His last will, signed with 
 His own blood. Now, faith does not consist in believing that 
 I am a believer, but in believing in Jesus Christ ; and all the 
 rest — ^joy, peace, love, hope, and every other blessing — will 
 assuredly follow. Oh, how simple is faith, and how many 
 make a Christ of it, when it is nothing more than believing ! 
 But, lest I should mislead here : this faith is a divine opera- 
 tion, and is the gift of God ; but all that we have to do is to 
 deal with the matter-of-fact truth of the Gopsel. In the Acts 
 of the Apostles, you will find that they invariably stated to 
 sinners the things concerning Jesus, and when they heard they 
 believed and rejoiced. You do not find they looked into their 
 own hearts for evidences when they were called to believe. 
 They received the truth at once, and rejoiced with a joy un- 
 speakable and fall of glory. AYe are to look for comfort only 
 to Christ. The bitten Israelites looked at once and direct to 
 the brazen serpent, and were healed ; and when we want 
 (renewed) healing, we must look again and again. Oh, the 
 
THE EVERLASTING LOVE OF GOD. 275 
 
 precious fountain for sin and uncleanness ! I am obliged to 
 come again and again to it. May the Lord disperse every 
 dark cloud from your mind ; for well I know, Jesus loves not 
 to see His child mourning in unbelief. The weakness of the 
 body often affects the mind ; but, let what may be our feelings, 
 Jesus' love is always the same, and the Lord changes not. 
 What I have written, you know, beloved friend, as well as I 
 do. And yet often when a cloud comes over the mind, it is 
 the privilege of one who is travelling in a lighter part of the 
 road to speak a word of consolation. Cheer up, beloved of 
 God, it is all right ; for God, even our own God, is with you, 
 to do you good ; and every trial you now meet with is to make 
 you cling closer to Jesus, that you may know Him better and 
 love Him more I am fighting on my way, often sor- 
 rowing and rejoicing at the same time, — mourning for my sins, 
 w^liile I can and do rejoice that Christ has made an all-suffi- 
 cient atonement for all, past, present, and to come; which, 
 while it humbles me in the dust of self-abhorrence, makes me 
 increasingly long to be like Him. Only believe, and it will be 
 well with you through time and throughout an endless eter- 
 nity." 
 
 TO THE SAME. THE EVERLASTING LOVE OF GOD. 
 
 " . . . . It is so pleasant to talk of an absent friend, — a 
 friend that one dearly loves, and longs to see ; particularly if 
 tlie person with whom you are conversing is especially inter- 
 ested in the subject. As I sat musing alone, I thought of 
 Christ, and then of you ; and as I am too far to hold a conver- 
 sation, I must write a little about Him we both love ; and we 
 love Him because He first loved us. If we feel one particle of 
 love to Him, be assured it is a proof that He loves us. But 
 still there are seasons when our hearts are so cold and insensi- 
 ble, that it would not do always to have this as a test of His 
 love to us. What a mercy of mercies to have such a God to 
 deal with, who cannot cease to love, because He cannot 
 change ! How much solid comfort is in this thought ! How 
 it quiets and soothes all our doubts and fears, and puts Satan's 
 ' ifs' to the blush ! There is no uncertainty with God. His 
 thoughts of love towards us have been from everlasting to 
 everlasting. He loved us when we were wandering far from 
 Him, and fur from happiness. He loved us when we knew 
 Him not. He loved us out of vSatan's kingdom into the king- 
 
276 MEMOIR OF MRS. M iRY WINSLOW. 
 
 dom of grace, and He will love us into the kingdom of glory. 
 Our doubts and fears may harass us, but they can make no 
 alteration in His eternal purposes. Jesus is alive ; never fear ! 
 He is risen and at the right hand of the Majesty of heaven, 
 and is tho executor of His own will, entrusting it not to the 
 highest angel in heaven. Let us then encourage our hearts in 
 the Lord, and know that w^hile we are looking to Jesus, He is 
 at that very moment looking on us with a heart overflowing 
 wath love, as eternal as Himself. May He draw us nearer to 
 Himself, and conform us to His own lovely image." 
 
 TO THE SAME. SPIRITUAL ENCOURAGEMENT. 
 
 " . . . . I was rejoiced to hear that you were enabled (if 
 it was only for a moment) to cast yourself upon Christ. Be 
 assured the time will come when He wnll enable you to do it 
 wholly. He is leading you by degrees, to see what He is, and 
 what He is to you ; and for wise purposes. He is teaching you 
 many hard lessons, that you may be prepared to teach others ; 
 and thus He is fitting you for future usefulness. Let me not, 
 in thus speaking, put a stumbling-block in your w^ay. There 
 is such a fulness in the boundless love of Christ's heart, that 
 there is no necessity for staying out of it for one moment. It 
 was framed for sinners ; and there is room enough for you, for 
 me, and for ten thousand more. Oh, let us enter in at once 
 and feel at home, no longer strangers, but at home with a loving 
 Father and a precious Christ. This is what I covet for you. 
 I pray you may be led to cease from all teaching but that of 
 the Eternal Spirit, and with the word of God in your hand. 
 May God pour into your soul such a sense of His wondrous 
 love for you, as will enable you to triumph over all the host of 
 foes within and without. And when you see His holy face, 
 and can cast a thought on me, oh, remind Him what a poor one 
 He has in your unworthy sister." 
 
 TO LADY L . ON ANTICIPATION OF HEAVEN. 
 
 " Beloved in the Lord, — April 21st. 
 
 " I grieve that I was obhged to leave home without 
 seeing you again ; but if we meet no more on earth, there is a 
 blessed world where I expect to meet you, and all we love 
 who have preceded us there. Let us keep our eye and our 
 hearts upon it. Earth is but a stage erected as our passage to 
 
POWER OF CHRIST'S RESURRECTION. 277 
 
 the place Jesus has gone to prepare for us. And what a place 
 must that be, which Infinite power and love has engaged to 
 provide I Oh, let us not lose sight of heaven for a moment. 
 How prone we are to allow our minds and hearts (treacherous 
 hearts!) to become entangled with the baubles of a dying 
 world. No wonder Christ exhorted us to icatch and pray. 
 Heaven is our home — our happy home, We are but strangers 
 and pilgrims here. Try and realize it. Let us keep ourselves 
 ready to enter with Him to the marriage supper of the Lamb. 
 In a little while, and we shall see Him, not as the ' Man of 
 sorrows,' but the 'King in his beauty.' Shall we not know 
 Him the moment we get there ? Shall we not recognise that 
 blessed countenance, which so often cheered and encouraged us 
 when cast down ? Dear friend, w^e shall. Then, let us fight 
 against earth and all its false attractions, for it passeth away. 
 Let us keep close to Christ ; go to Him on all occasions, and 
 never be satisfied without an interview with our best beloved. 
 TVere the Queen to invite us to visit her, and we went to the 
 palace, but did not see her, should we return satisfied or 
 pleased ? Just so with the King of kings. When we go to 
 Him, let us not come away without having an interview. We 
 must speak to Him, open our whole heart to Him, while He 
 opens His loving heart to us. This is communion, and there 
 IS no communion without it. May all your children be led to 
 choose the one thing needful. What a mercy for a family to 
 have a praying mother ! Love, tender love to you." 
 
 TO MISS M . THE POWER OF CHRISt's RESURRECTION. 
 
 " Dear Sister ix Jesus, — May 4th. 
 
 " What shall I say to you for my apparent neglect 
 
 of your kind and considerate letter, when dear was with 
 
 you? I take shame to myself that I have not before thanked 
 you for it, and trust it is not now too late, . . . God be 
 praised for the precious Gospel, which reveals to us the whole 
 will of God. What should we do without the Bible ? and 
 what should we do without Jesus, the source and substance of 
 the Bible ? and what should we do without the Spirit's holy 
 teaching ? God be praised for all ; all is boundless, f?,^homless 
 love, from first to last. Dear friend, I have often had you in 
 my mind since I saw you at Leamington, and thought I would 
 write and induce you to tell me now and then how gracious 
 
278 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 God was dealing with you. Pie is full of love. No tongue 
 can tell how gracious He is to unworthy me ; and is He not 
 so to you, dear friend ? Could you live without Him ? I can- 
 not. He is the health and joy of my soul. His name is as 
 ointment poured forth. What will heaven be, where we shall 
 see Him face to face ? Do you not at times long to be there, a 
 pure spirit, in due time inhabiting a glorified body, mingling 
 with the happy beings, many of whom we knew and loved, 
 around the throne ? Mighty are our present privileges. What 
 could we do without a throne of grace ? Do we not need it 
 every step Ave take, and at each turn of Providence ? Let us, 
 then, endeavour, dear friend, to live more on high, — more in 
 full expectation of our great change. I believe that a constant 
 looking to the glory that awaits us, will enable us to live above 
 the trials of the way ; will strengthen our faith to overcome, 
 and cause us to sit in heavenly ^jlaces in Christ Jesus ; realizing 
 in our soul's experience, that all is true that our God has told 
 us and promises us. The resurrection of Christ is to me a 
 blessed confirmation that all else that is revealed is true. If 
 Christ be risen from the grave and is in heaven, then my soul 
 is as safe as if I were there at this moment. Every other re- 
 vealed truth rests upon this one ; and if this is a verity, all 
 else is so. Now we have but to believe this, and joy and 
 gratitude, love and hope, at once spring up in the soul. Then 
 comes the question, Lord^ luhat icouldst thou have me to dof 
 The believer will not be satisfied with merely being saved. 
 Though this is a great mercy, there yet are enjoyments, I do 
 believe, experienced as we travel onward in the heavenly 
 journey, that far, — oh, how far ! — surpass the paltry glory of 
 this poor passing world ; experienced only by those who are 
 united to the living Vine. May the Lord help you to go for- 
 ward, to know more and more of the power of His resurrec- 
 tion, — to follow on to know the Lord. The more we have to 
 do with Christ the more we shall know of His excellencies, 
 His sympathy, and His exquisite, boundless love. Pray for 
 me, that I may be more anxious to press forward, and not be 
 satisfied to know these things in theory only, but in my soul's 
 sweet experience. In a little while, and we shall be there. I 
 believe, from the signs of the times, we may hope soon to see 
 Him whom we love, coming in the clouds of heaven, to take 
 His weary Church to Himself. Think of me when waiting 
 before our mutual Friend." 
 
FORESHADOWING OF THE COMING GLORY. 279 
 
 to mrs. t . jesus with his saints in sickness. 
 
 " My dear Friend, — 
 
 " I hear from dear E , that your dear husband is 
 
 very ill. Perhaps this illness is not unto death, and that he 
 will yet be spared to you, and you to him, a little longer in 
 this vale of tears. But oh, when faith is in lively exercise, 
 how sweet is the thought of going home ; dropping the weary, 
 worn out body for a season, in full confidence of one day being 
 united to it again ! How kind it was in Jesus to give us that 
 promise from His own dear lips, / will raise it up again at the 
 last day ! That identically same body ; but oh, how changed, 
 how beautified ! Then soul and body in re-union shall stand 
 before a holy Lord God, and Christ shall fully see and perfectly 
 enjoy the travail of His soul. Tell him that all that Jesus has 
 said is true ; that He is in heaven who died for sinners ; and 
 that no believing soul, however great his sins, can be lost while 
 Christ lives. He has said to him. Because I live, ye shall live 
 also. The same Jesus who, a poor and despised Man of sor- 
 rows, trod the streets of Jerusalem, is in heaven, as full of 
 goodness, tenderness, and love, as when here below. He is 
 now with you, and is watching beside the sick-bed of your 
 dear husband, saying to him, ' Fear not, it is I. It is I that 
 lived for you, that died for you, that rose again for you, and 
 am now waiting to w^elcome you home. I have prepared a 
 place for you.' Absent from the body, we shall be present 
 with the Lord. When his eyes close on earth, at that very 
 instant he will open them upon Jesus Himself. Comfort him 
 with these precious truths. May God be with you." 
 
 TO THE SAME. FORESHADOWING OF THE COMING GLORY. 
 
 " April 13th. 
 " . . . . We must not lose sight of each other, for the time 
 is shortening. The present signs speak loudly to us. Prepare 
 to meet thy God! But oh, what a pleasant prospect is before 
 us, almost in full view. Jesus is at hand, and if He does not 
 soon come to us, we shall soon go to Him, our best and dear- 
 est Friend. Oh, to see His face, once so wearied and care- 
 worn, traced with sorrow and with grief, — and that because 
 our sins were laid upon Him, — but now resplendent v/ith 
 glory ; His countenance beaming w^ith ineffable delight upon 
 His redeemed, blood-bought family, rescued from the power of 
 
280 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 hell, death, and the grave. Can we conceive of anything to 
 equal such a scene ? The Bridegroom rejoicing over his bride, 
 saints singing, angels admiring. Endeavour to realize this, 
 dear friend. Take your walks in the good land flowing with 
 milk and honey. I am never so happy as when I am able so 
 to do. To hold converse with spirits around the throne ; above 
 all, with Him who sits upon it. Nothing in this fading world 
 can equal it. A throne of grace, with a broken heart for sin, 
 and a pardoning Saviour, is a verdant spot in this wilder- 
 ness. . . ." 
 
 to mrs. a . on the confession of sin. 
 
 " Dear Sister in the Lord, — 
 
 " . . . . AA^hile I recommend this dear Christian friend, as 
 a companion, sweet it is to think how soon, how very soon, we 
 shall be fitted for the companionship of Jesus Himself, behold- 
 ing Him in all His unveiled beauties. Does not the thought 
 often gladden your heart, and fill your eyes with tears of joy, 
 and holy contrition for sin? I cannot conceive of holy joy 
 unaccompanied with godly sorrow. Confession of sin should 
 make up one -half of our lives. Only achiowledge thine 
 iniquity. And when we remember that we have to do with 
 One so willing and so able to pardon, it becomes then a 
 mingled feeling of pleasure and pain. By confessing sin, we 
 gather strength to resist it ; thereby the enemy of our souls 
 is foiled, the conscience is kept tender, the heart is sanctified, 
 and the blood of Jesus becomes increasingly precious. Let 
 us constantly flee to the cleansing fountain ; for if we say 
 loe have no sin, tve deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. 
 If ive confess our sins. He is faithful and just to forgive 
 us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. Oh, 
 to go and acknowledge the hidden, concealed evil of our hearts 
 — that sin that no eye has seen or can see but God's holy eye. 
 Is not this a high privilege ? And who can subdue sin in us 
 but Jesus ? I might as well attempt to remove mountains, as 
 to reason away one corruption of my fallen nature. But if we, 
 the moment we detect it, carry it to Jesus, He will do it all 
 for us. This is one of the most difficult lessons to learn in the 
 school of Christ. I am but just beginning to learn it, and 
 therefore I am placed in the youngest class, travelling to Jesus 
 more as a little helpless child, for Him to do all for and all in 
 me. My fancied strength is all vanished, my boasted rea^son 
 
GRATEFUL REVIEWS. 281 
 
 turned into follj, and now, thus living on Christ in childhke 
 siraphcity, my peace, joy, and consolation, are past expression. 
 Oh, the love, the matchless love of Jesus to a poor sinner ly- 
 ing thus at His dear feet, waiting to receive a welcoming smile 
 beaming from His countenance. Dear friend, keep close to 
 Him. Let not the world or its cares come between you and 
 Christ. If there is a cloud, rest not until it Avithdraws. Go 
 again and again, should there be but a shade, until it is put 
 away, and you see Him who loves you. I think, if it were 
 possible to be sensible of shame in heaven, we should be 
 ashamed of our sins, — above every other, of the sin of unbelief. 
 . . . You may, perhaps, wonder why confession of sin should 
 be the subject upon which I have chiefly written, I had just 
 returned, when I took up my pen to address you, from my 
 cojifessional — the throne of grace — so sweetly refreshed and so 
 blessedly pardoned, that I could not refrain from recommend- 
 ing it to all I love and write to, as one of the most hallowed 
 exercises of the Christian. I often repair to it heavily laden, 
 and return as though nestling beneath the wing of the Saviour. 
 I tell Him all that is in my heart, and what I could not tell 
 the dearest friend on earth. He keeps all my secrets ; and 
 while I open my sinful heart to Him, He unveils His loving, 
 gracious heart to me. This truly happy intercourse with God, 
 I would urge upon all whom I love, and who love Him. 
 Nothing must be kept back. Descending to particulars, we 
 must deal with God in small as well as in great matters. One 
 lifting up of the heart — one thought darting heavenward, when 
 surrounded by clouds, is sufficient for Jesus. Lord, help us so 
 to live and so to die." 
 
 TO MRS. R . GRATEFUL REVIEWS. 
 
 " Dear Friend, — October 5th, 1852. 
 
 " My own dear pastor, Mr. Evans, has often said to me, 
 ' Dear sister, what a poor world it is !' And such I find it in- 
 creasingly. We shall soon be gathering up our garments in 
 preparation, I trust, for a better. What folly to wish to stay 
 in a wilderness longer than is needful. You and I are daily 
 Hearing our heavenly home, and Jesus stands ready to put us 
 in full possession of our glorious inheritance, prepared for us 
 before the foundation of the world. With adoring gratitude I 
 look back on all the way He has led me, and stand in wonder- 
 ing praise at His long-suffering patience, gentleness, kindness, 
 
282 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 and forbearance. My heart seems ready to melt into contri- 
 tion in view of the ten thousand, thousand sins, wilful and 
 aggravating, that I have committed against Him, who loved 
 me with an everlasting love, and with loving-kindness drew 
 me to Himself, I think, were it possible, there would be weep- 
 ing in heaven. But not so. My tears will be wiped away 
 there. Repentance is not a thing to be once done and then 
 done with. Not so. The more I see of Jesus, the more He 
 opens to me His loving heart, the deeper is the sorrow for sin. 
 I lie down in the dust of His feet closer than ever I did be- 
 fore. I can truly say, I abhor myself in dust and ashes before 
 Him. Sins of early days are brought before me as if just com- 
 mitted — over them I weep. As I get nearer the land of glory, 
 the light dawning from thence shows more vividly the dark- 
 ness within, and the hatefulness of that which crucified the 
 Lord of life and glory. I am nearing day by day my heaven- 
 ly inheritance. It seems at times almost in view. It is but a 
 step, and I am there. I am led often to live [as it were] my 
 life over again ; and how plainly do I see now the why and 
 the wherefore He dealt with me, in leading me through trials 
 and tribulations. How good is the Lord ! At present my 
 feelings are blended. I rejoice while I weep. Oh, there is 
 none like Jesus in earth or in heaven, I sometimes long to 
 be there, I am quite sure the nearer we get to glory, the at- 
 mosphere becomes clearer, and we can see afar off, Stephen, 
 when departing, saw Him standing at the right hand of God, 
 ready to welcome His first martyr home, Wliat will heaven 
 be ! Let us live more in preparation for it, and realize it more 
 than we do. I find nothing so keeps the heart right, as hav- 
 ing constant communication with Christ. . . . As soon as we 
 are born again, He puts us to school, the Holy Ghost being 
 our teacher ; and many hard lessons we have to learn. Some 
 of us are dull scholars, and require to learn the same lessons 
 over and over again, and often need the rod. The hardest 
 task we have to study is ourselves. Another lesson is, to hun- 
 ger and thirst for more, not satisfied witli what we do know, 
 but to follow on to know more of the matchless love that there 
 is in the Jieart of Jesus, And this, I believe, we shall be 
 learning out through eternity, and never come to the end of it. 
 Oh, let us hold fast our oneness with Christ ! And not only 
 pray, but go not away without an answer. The blessed spirit 
 who indites the prayer, responds to it, and thus we know we 
 have the ear of God." 
 
ENTERING FULLY INTO CHRIST. 283 
 
 to mrs. w on entering fully into christ. 
 
 "Dear Friend, — 
 
 " , . . . Many years have I laboured with you, 
 and yet you have not arrived at the state in which I have long 
 wished to see you — full of the Holy Ghost and of joy. And 
 why is it ? What hinders ? All things are ready — the table 
 is spread — Christ invites you. There is everything in the gos- 
 pel to fill you with gladness and joy, above all with real happi- 
 ness, such as this poor world knows nothing of. This is what 
 I covet for myself and for all God's redeemed ones. It is a 
 mercy and a great one, to know that we are saved ; but this 
 is only the beginning of blessings. Greater blessings await us 
 journeying through the wilderness to the land of glory. Sup- 
 pose we have faith in Christ, and a good hope through grace, 
 this is but the first round in that ladder that reaches from earth 
 to heaven. We are to ascend higher and higher, always 
 looking upward, never downward, lest we become dizzy and 
 fall. Oh, it is only looking to Jesus that keeps us ascending. 
 They go from strength to strength^ every one of them in Zion ap- 
 peareth before God. As I have often said before, we cannot 
 be stationary in the divine life — we are advancing or receding. 
 It must be one way or the other. How many, dear I believe 
 to Christ, do I find, who, after years of profession, are just in 
 the same spot at which they set out ! They know no more of 
 Christ than they did at the first. Now in worldly things this 
 would not be so. But, oh, when such riches await us — honour, 
 glory, and immortality — how diligent and earnest should we 
 be to make progress in the way, and so glorify our God ! 
 Every stage on the road brings us nearer to our happy home. 
 Oh, the joy of soon being with Jesus ! Heaven is very near. 
 The eternal world is all around us. Oh, to realize this con- 
 tinually ! We do not dwell sufficiently on these glorious 
 realities ; we do not bring them home to ourselves. We are 
 either too much engaged with earthly things, or are looking 
 more within the dark recesses of our hearts, than to the glory 
 that awaits us, and into the possession of which we might be 
 any moment introduced. 
 
 " In studying the prophecies, there might be much benefit 
 in our researches, if we found more of Jesus. It is the looking 
 to Jesus — the going to Jesus — the confession of sins to Jesus 
 — the constant application of His blood — disclosing to Him all 
 we fear, all we doubt, all we hope, all that is in our hearts, 
 
284 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 which, dear friend, I would have you cultivate. Let nothing 
 come between you and your best Friend, Never forget, you 
 and Christ are one — one in time and one in eternity. The 
 world, and all its riches, glories, and honours, is as dross when 
 compared with the blessedness of our union with Jesus. Do 
 not be satisfied unless in prayer you have the presence of God. 
 Rest not in mere prayer. I must feel that I have the ear of 
 God when I draw near to Him ; and when I have not a sense 
 of His presence, I am not hajDpy ; and I go again and again, 
 until He lifts up upon me the sweet light of His countenance ; 
 and if ever I have had the broken and the contrite heart, it has 
 been when He most shone into my soul. Oh, the wondrous 
 condescension of our God! He does even now leave the 
 heavens and come down to bless us. How boundless is the 
 love of God to the feeblest of His little ones ! Excuse all my 
 mistakes. I write thus in haste, and I am as busy as an old 
 woman of seventy eight can be. My tender love to your hus- 
 band. May you both grow daily in grace, and in the knowl- 
 edge of Christ." 
 
 TO THE SAME. ON HEARING THE VOICE OF JESUS. 
 
 " . . . . Do you think that you have sought the Lord all 
 these years, and that He has not heard you ? But, you will 
 reply, ' He has not answered me.' Well, that is your fault, 
 and not His. You have been looking within yourself, instead 
 of looking full at Jesus. He, who was once a poor despised 
 Man of sorrows, is now risen from the dead, and having paid 
 the full penalty of your sins and mine, is now ready to hear 
 your plea, and to send into your soul a full sense of pardon. 
 Wrestle with Him until He answers. Jesus will speak, and 
 speak comfortably to you. Once I pleaded with Him, and I 
 did not rest until He said, ' I am thy salvation.' I went to my 
 bed unconverted ; I rose in the morning a saved sinner — an 
 adopted child of God. I never closed my eyes to sleep until 
 Jesus spoke peace to my longing heart. Oh, how sweet and 
 how wonderful was the voice of Christ to my soul ! And this 
 voice I have heard again and again since then. When in deep 
 trouble, often has He spoken words of comfort and rich con- 
 solation, allayed my fears, and soothed my sorrows. Oh, such 
 a Jesus is He ! He cannot but hear you, and cause you to 
 hear Him. His love transcends the united love of all crea 
 tures, as the Infinite exceeds the finite. Do not rest without 
 
A. WORD IN SEASON. 285 
 
 a sense of it. On my knees this morning, I had such a blessed 
 interview with the Saviour of sinners, as I would not exchange 
 for a thousand interviews with all the kings of the earth. The 
 Spirit seemed to bring you so fresh to my mind afterwards, 
 that I could not help again urging you, in the dear, loving 
 name of Jesus, not to stop short of this blessing, that you too 
 may be enabled to say, ^ I sought the Lord, and He heard me, 
 and saved me from all my fears.'' I find confession of sin — sins 
 of heart, lip, life — a season of penitential communion with Jesus, 
 and a time of refreshing from the Lord. He loves to hear 
 your voice. He waits to be gracious. Think of Christ wait- 
 ing and listening to hear your voice pleading with Him. Jesus 
 never turns away from the broken-hearted sinner, and never 
 can. "When you hear the precious voice of Jesus, you must 
 let me know. ' My sheej) hear my voice.^ You cannot mistake 
 it. Read the Psalms of David. David's God is the same as 
 He was in David's time. '/, the Lord, change not.^ Deal with 
 Him as such, and rest not until you can say, ' He has spoken 
 peace to my soul.' 
 
 ' My soul, ask what thou wilt, 
 
 Thou canst not be too bold. 
 Since for thy sake His blood was spilt, 
 
 What else will He withhold ? ' 
 
 TO THE REV. J. H. E . A WORD IN SEASON TO A PASTOR 
 
 IN ILLNESS. 
 
 " Beloved Brother, — 
 
 " Has He who is all love, nothing but love to you and 
 to me, again laid that loving hand upon you, and taken you 
 aside for a little season, that He might converse with you 
 alone ; that He might show you more privately what is in His 
 heart, and lead you deeper and deeper into that mine of un- 
 fathomable wealth that is in store for you and me, and all that 
 are His own elect ? Oh, what a God is ours ! how gracious, 
 how mighty in all His dealings with us ! And has He not to 
 do with us moment by moment ? His dear loving eye is upon 
 you in your sick chamber, in your retirement. Who can sepa- 
 rate you from Christ ? not from his love only, but from Him- 
 self. He is in you, and you are in Him — a partaker of His 
 nature ; one with Him, through time and through eternity. 
 Blessed thought ! Oh, to live for Him and Him only ! Jesus 
 is watching over you with the tenderest sympathy, such sym- 
 pathy as mortals know nothing of. He is now most kindly, 
 
286 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 most mercifully dealing with you. He has some communica- 
 tions to make to your soul, be assured, which can be done in 
 no other way. So the Lord works with His beloved ones. 
 In a little while, and we shall be with Him, see and love Him 
 as we now desire, but cannot. And yet we might have more 
 of heaven below than we have. If we had more constant 
 dealings with Him than we have, how much more real happi- 
 ness should we experience ! To be loith Jesus is heaven below 
 and above. Heaven itself would be no heaven to me if He 
 were not there. No, though all I loved on earth were there, 
 and He not, it were no heaven to me, nor you either, beloved 
 brother. The presence of our God will make that place of 
 bliss all that it ever will be to us throughout an endless eter- 
 nity ; and when I think how near we are, and how soon we 
 may be there, how trifling does all the glory of the world ap- 
 pear ! Oh, to live on high ; to get closer and closer to Jesus, 
 and see in a Father's heart all that the feeblest of His tender 
 weaklings can desire ! Dear brother, the Lord has brought 
 me to live more as a helpless infant upon Him day by day, 
 and so enter more fully into that truth, Without Me ye can do 
 nothing. How sweetly does the spirit work in us after truth ; 
 and although we need and acknowledge it, yet it is only by deep 
 experience and by the mighty power of the Holy Spirit we 
 are effectually taught. Dear brother, you know all this a 
 thousand times better than I can tell you ; but still it is a com- 
 fort to speak together of Christ's doings, and the Avay He takes 
 with us. There is not a circumstance but infinite wisdom and 
 love are in it. Christ is in the furnace with you now, and not 
 a hair of your head shall be injured. He is at your side mo- 
 ment by moment, and you shall see the wherefore He has laid 
 you aside from your pleasant work. May you listen and hear 
 what the Lord would say unto you in this providence. There 
 is a voice. It is not in the strong wind, it is not in the earth- 
 quake, it is not in the fire. It is the ' still small voice' of our 
 Jehovah-Jesus, that w^ill sweetly, blessedly speak to your soul. 
 The voice of His Spirit within. When He speaks comfort, 
 who can, what can give disquietude ? When Jesus speaks, all 
 is hushed into silence ; for there is no voice like His. Is He 
 not the same who spake to Abraham, to Isaac, to Jacob, and 
 to Moses in the wilderness ; and who tabernacled in the flesh 
 for a season here below ? Is He not the same who spoke to 
 Saul of Tarsus, after his resurrection, and who stood by him in 
 
THE LORD THE REFUGE IN THE STORM. 287 
 
 the storm, to encourage his heart ? And is He not the same 
 to you and to me now ? I feel He is the same, and I desire 
 to go to Him as such, expecting great things, since He is a 
 great God and a great Saviour. Therefore He savs, Open thy 
 mouth wide, and I loill fill it. I fear I may weary you, though 
 I could write a volume on the subject. Precious, precious 
 Jesus, bless, oh, bless my beloved brother ; heal him, and lift 
 up upon him the light of Thy countenance, and draw him 
 nearer and nearer to Thyself. 
 
 TO HER SON. THE LORD THE REFUGE IN THE STORM. 
 
 "I wrote to you, that I have had for several days a sore 
 conflict, greatly tried by sin within, and by cross-providences 
 without. I was in a storm, and had no more power to guide 
 it than an infant conflicting with a giant. I went to my strong- 
 hold again and again. I felt that Christ could do it. I lay 
 prostrate at His feet, pleading the promises as flist as the Holy 
 Ghost brought them to me. In a short time afterwards I was 
 placed just in that position that was the most trying ; but all 
 was calm, peace, and quietness. It was the Lord, Oh, how 
 grateful I felt ! I retired to my room, to thank the Lord for 
 His goodness. He tried my faith, and at last brought me 
 down powerless at His feet, who has said, All power is Mine, 
 in heaven and on earth. By these things we are taught experi- 
 mentally wherein our great strength lies. Mere head-knowl- 
 edge will do no good. The Lord is the helper of His people, 
 and there is no other. Thus the Holy Ghost works in the 
 souls of the redeemed. Precious Jesus ! Thou art that Friend 
 that sticketh closer than a brother, or the tenderest and dearest 
 object on earth. I was led this morning to reason with the 
 Lord in His own words. Without Me ye can do nothing. If 
 you have ever beheld a vessel in a fearful storm, followed by 
 a sudden calm, you can fancy my situation. The Lord be 
 praised for His goodness. My soul desires to give Him the 
 glory." 
 
 to mrs. lieut.-colonel p b , india, on keeping 
 
 an open heart with god. 
 "Dear, very dear Friend, — 
 
 " Through the kindness of dear Mr. C , I have 
 
 obtained your address, and a kind message from you. Thus 
 does the Lord unite His own family in the blessed bonds of 
 
288 MEMOIR OP MRS. MARY WINSLOW 
 
 Christian love. Oh, may this be to us a sweet earnest that 
 this union, commenced in the wilderness, will continue through- 
 out a blessed eternity ! Since I last saw you, we have made 
 some rapid strides towards the haven of rest. I trust, if we 
 meet no more in this vale of tears, we shall meet there. There 
 will be no wide ocean to separate the one dear family of God, 
 and we shall know as we are known. There will be perfect 
 knowledge, perfect purity, perfect love. Oh, may a view of 
 the blessings awaiting us encourage our hearts to press on to 
 know more and more of the power of the Lord's resurrection 
 in our souls ! By faith are we saved, through the finished 
 work of Jesus Christ ; and if the Holy Ghost has taken pos- 
 session of our hearts, we shall manifest it by a holy walk and con- 
 versation before a gainsaying world. Oh, that you may follow 
 on to know more and more of the truth as it is in Jesus ! Be 
 not satisfied with your present measure of faith. Press on for 
 m.ore. Greater things await you. Jesus stands ready to 
 bestow all you need, all you ask. When you go to Jesus to 
 make known your requests, go in the expectancy of prayer. 
 The importunate prayer will meet with an answer. Lord^ Thou 
 hast heard the desire of the humble; Thou wilt prepare their heart; 
 Thou toilt cause thine ear to hear. Psa. x. 17. When I go to 
 the throne of grace, I cannot be satisfied unless I feel I have 
 the ear of God. I cannot be happy if I have not communion 
 with Him my soul loveth. Perhaps you will reply, * But I do 
 not know or feel that I love God.' Well, go and tell Jesus 
 that. If your heart appears cold, hard, and insensible, take it 
 to Jesus, and tell Him how it is with you. He wnll warm, 
 soften, and fill it with His love. Go, under all circumstances, 
 and tell Him all you feel, and all you do not feel. Oh, keep 
 an open heart with the Saviour of sinners! Make sure of 
 heaven. Let nothing of an earthly nature come between you 
 and it. Let it be your chief w^ork, and occupy your best 
 thoughts. Look not behind, but press forward, and Christ will 
 give you life and love, joy and peace in believing. Keep close 
 to Jesus, for He is your life. In all your fears, failures, and 
 discouragements, go to Him, and tell Him all. Oh, live for 
 eternity! Realize your adoption into God's family. Never 
 rest until you know you are born of God. Go again and again 
 until He answers your prayer, and satisfies you on this all-im- 
 portant point. I sought the Lord^ and He heard me. There 
 must be first union, and then communion. I hasten to conclude. 
 
LETTER OF CHRISTIAN CONDOLENCE. 289 
 
 Oh, that I might meet jou in heaven ! My journey on earth 
 cannot now be much longer. Jesus is ready to receive me, 
 and my prospect at times is bright and glorious. I shall know 
 you then. Perfect knowledge we shall then have. Heaven 
 is worth living for, and it is worth dying for. I commend the 
 loving Saviour to you. He is all that He says He is. His 
 heart is ever towards you, and His eye is ever upon you." 
 
 "Dec. 19, 185L 
 To the >Sa??ie.— "Deeply has my heart felt for you, my dear, 
 widowed friend, since I heard how the Lord had dealt with 
 you in removing your dear husband. I know what that 
 widowed heart feels, from having passed through the same 
 myself while in a strange land. I do feel for you ; though, 
 long before this reaches you, I trust the Lord has comforted 
 your soul with the consolation which He alone can impart. 
 All these things are to lead you to Himself; and He says now 
 to you, ' Daughter, give me thy heart. I have taken thy hus- 
 band, but I will be unto thee better than ten husbands, for I 
 am the Husband of the widow. Look unto Me, and be saved 
 from all your fears.' I have heard no particulars of your sad 
 bereavement, and write at a venture. Should you return to 
 this country, how much I should like to see you once more ! 
 The Lord is still keeping me here, and preparing me for the 
 great change from earth to heaven. Who would not be a 
 Christian? Dear friend, I do trust that this heavy affliction 
 has brought you nearer to Jesus, and that you can now say, 
 ' He is my Saviour and my God.' The Lord does nothing in 
 vain. All His dispensations are intended to awaken us to a full 
 and just sense of our responsibilities, and of our accountability to 
 Him. He has made us, and made us for Himself; and what a 
 mercy to be brought to know this, and to turn to the Lord ! 
 He loves us too well unnecessarily to afflict us. Nestle now 
 under His loving, protecting wing. Get close to Jesus. Open 
 all your heart to Him. His ear is open to all your requests. 
 Take Him as your Husband, Brother, Friend, Counsellor, and 
 present Help in every time of trouble. I have had you much 
 in my thoughts and in my heart. If you can, drop me a line. 
 I may not be long here. Jesus, the very same Jesus that once 
 was on earth, is waiting to welcome all who seek and love Him 
 here into the realms of eternal blessedness. No more tears 
 there — no more sorrow — no more sin ; all glory begun and 
 13 
 
290 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 never ending. Make your calling and election sure ; and en- 
 deavour to induce- others to come to Jesus, and partake of the 
 same mighty blessings. Farewell! If you see the dear 
 C s, give my love to them both." 
 
 TO THE HON. F. T , ON MAKING SURE OF SALVATION. 
 
 "My dear Friend,— Leamington, March 9, 1853. 
 
 " TVe are still journeying onward, but ivhere? is the 
 question. Is it not a solemn thought ? Should we not examine 
 well our chart and the way-marks, to see if we are in the right 
 way ? Should this be left to an uncertainty by a wise man ? 
 Again I repeat the solemn truth, we are on an eventful journey, 
 which must terminate in eternal life or in eternal death. Men, 
 blinded by the enemy, will keep fully occupied with everything 
 and anything but what would conduce to the soul's salvation. 
 Beware of Satan's whiles ! Turn in upon your own soul, and 
 ask yourself, 'Am I ready to give in my last account to the 
 Judge of all the earth ? Can I stand before His scrutinizing 
 eye ? Can He look upoH me, and see no spot, or wrinkle, or 
 any such thing ? Can I appear in perfect holiness before Him 
 who cannot look upon sin but with the greatest displeasure ?' 
 Dear friend let me entreat you to be honest with your own soul. 
 Eternity, eternity, with all its solemn realities, is before us. 
 Flee at once to Jesus, the Saviour of poor sinners, nor leave 
 Him until He speaks peace to your soul. Wrestle with Him 
 for this mighty blessing ; for, sure I am, if you do, you will 
 get it. Give no rest to your soul, until you can say, 'My soul 
 is saved ! Christ is my surety ! Christ is mine, and I am 
 Christ's!' How busy is Satan Avhen a poor sinner is about 
 securing a glorious inheritance ! He suggests, ' You are saved. 
 You go to church ; you say your prayers ; you give to the 
 poor ; you do no harm ; you have often good thoughts in your 
 heart. What more can you do ? Are you not in your duty 
 when you attend to your parliamentary concerns — the concerns 
 of the nation? Oh, what a wily foe is he! He will try 
 every means to keep a soul from seeking Jesus as a lost sinner; 
 and you will never find Him until you do. How would it 
 gladden my heart to hear you say, ' I have found Him of whom 
 Moses and the prophets have written.' Leave Him not until 
 He speaks peace to you, and sends you away rejoicing in Him, 
 I long to see you going on your way heavenward, rejoicing 
 in Christ Jesus, and helping on all who may be halting or have 
 
MAKING SURE OF SALVATION. 291 
 
 got entangled in this world's wilderaess. Take this world in 
 its best attire, it is but a wilderness of bitter-sweets. Dear 
 friend, give up your whole heart and soul to Jesus ; He will 
 accept you just as you are. He has said, ^ I will manifest my- 
 self unto you.'' Go and plead this promise. And, now, why 
 has Jesus laid you so near my heart as to cause me to write 
 this long letter? Because He loves you. Ever since the 
 memorable day we met, your salvation has been near my heart, 
 so that I do know that the Lord loves you, and that you are 
 dear to Him." 
 
 To the Same. — ""Wednesday morning. It is vain for me 
 to promise to see you in the evening. I r.m old and feeble, 
 and cannot do as I could wish. I am nearing my heavenly 
 inheritance ; and as this poor body must be laid by for a while, 
 it also is preparing for its quiet resting-place. But, oh, could 
 I but tell you of the blessed prospect that is before me, while 
 I gaze into the better world, and am sometimes favoured with 
 glimpses of the glory that awaits me — of Jesus ! If you and 
 I are ever saved. He bore all our sins in that fearful moment 
 when He hung upon the cross. He must have paid the full 
 penalty to the uttermost ere we could get to heaven. Oh, 
 think of this ? And how we ought to love Him ! "Was there 
 ever love like His ? And was there ever sorrow like His ? 
 It is this that often breaks my heart, and melts it into deep, 
 deep contrition for sin." 
 
 To the Same. — "June 15. My Christian brother, as I 
 believe you really are one of Christ's little flock, I wish to say 
 a word, seeing I may not meet you again in this poor, passing 
 world. It is a poor world, could we possess the whole of it, 
 with all its hopes and glory. You mentioned having a better 
 record of the Forbes family than mine. My son is preparing 
 a family tree, and I should like your record, if you can spare 
 it. But, oh, dear friend, how much better for you and me to 
 be a living branch of Christ Jesus, the true Vine ! According 
 to the regular course of things, we are hastening to the period 
 when the summons must come to each of us, ' Come up 
 hither !' Oh, the change from earth to heaven ! The thought 
 of seeing Jesus face to face ! Think, the joy of that moment ! 
 And yet how few I find are living in the full and joyful ex- 
 pectation of this coming event. And why ? because they 
 
292 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOvr. 
 
 have so few transactions with Jesus. ' They have so Httle to 
 say to Him, so httle to do with Him. He may be a friend or 
 an enemy, they are not quite sure. They have a sort of hope, 
 but it is fleeting and uncertain. What a poor hfe is this ! 
 Dear, worthy friend, I am more and more jealous on this sub- 
 ject, and would urge upon all I love not to rest short of 
 knowing their reconciliation to God through Jesus Christ. 
 Aim to walk with God even noiu ! To live upon Jesus — to 
 hold sweet, holy converse with Him — to go with an open 
 heart and tell Him all ! He will never frown your soul away. 
 He will smile a w^elcome, and listen to all you have to tell 
 Him. And when, conscious that we fall short of what w^e 
 ought to be. He says. Only acknoivledge thine iniquity. Let 
 us set out afresh to run the heavenly race — warmed wnth the 
 love of Christ in our heart, anointed with the Holy Ghost, 
 heaven in view, a crown of glory awaiting us, and Jesus on 
 the throne ready to bid us welcome. All, all is true. Heaven 
 is true, Christ is true. While everything around us appears 
 what it is not, fixing our eyes on the glory that awaits the 
 Christian, we can exclaim to the world lying in the wricked 
 one, Arouse from your slumbers, and come to Jesus. He 
 stands ready to receive all that come to Him, and will in no- 
 wise cast out. It is worth ten thousand worlds to know Him, 
 whom to know is life eternal ! All w^ould send love, but I 
 am alone in my room, where the Lord has often made himself 
 sweetly, blessedly known to my waiting soul. It has often 
 been a Bethel to me. There is none on earth or in heaven 
 like Jesus — the chiefest among ten thousand, the altogether 
 lovely. Oh, love Him ! Give your whole, your undivided 
 heart to Him. If I had a thousand. He should have them 
 all. Adieu. 
 
 " Believe me, affectionately, your sincere friend and fellow- 
 traveller to a better, brighter world." 
 
 TO LADY L , ON THE NECESSITY OF THE HOLY SPIRIT. 
 
 " My DEAR Friend, — 
 
 "How is it, above everything else, with thy soul, 
 that better part, that must live for ever ? And yet, though 
 we know this, how much more are our thoughts engaged 
 with this present evil world, and our poor decaying bodies, 
 than concerned to know what awaits us in an endless eternity. 
 
NECESSITY OF THE HOLY SPIRIT. 293 
 
 Is not this one of Satan's devices? He will endeavour to 
 engage our thoughts with often the veriest trifles that would 
 shame a child, in order to hide from us the eternal realities of 
 the glorv that awaits the believer. Oh, let us beware of 
 Satan's devices ! Many hard conflicts have I had with him 
 through my long and chequered life ; and, had I not been up- 
 held by Jesus, the sinner's Friend, I should have made ship- 
 wreck of my faith long since. But this dear Friend stands 
 ready to help you too. Recollect, He is a present help in 
 every time of need. You are now in a wilderness ; but a 
 wealthy land lies before you. Make your calling and election 
 sure. Make sure your acceptance in Christ. Is there, or can 
 there be, anything on earth of equal consequence to this ? A 
 soul saved, or a soul lost ! Come, just as you are, to Jesus. 
 The prayer, 'God be merciful to me a sinner,' springing from 
 a real sense of our need, and breathed from a heart feeling its 
 awful sinfulness, and the utter impossibility of salvation in any 
 other way, will, in due time, be responded to by the Holy 
 Spirit. We cannot utter one real prayer but b/ the Holy 
 Ghost. He it is who shows us our iniquity and helplessness, 
 teaches us how to pray, and what to ask for, and then responds 
 to our prayer. Oh, dear friend, pray over your Bible, that 
 this same blessed Spirit (the th^'rd Person .^n the blessed 
 Trinity) may unfold to your mind the precious truths it con- 
 tains. You do not know how anxious I am for your soul's 
 welfare. I long to see you going on your way rejoicing. 
 Never rest until you can say, ' I have found Jesus, and my 
 soul is saved !' You can go to Jesus, the same as did the dis- 
 ciples when He walked the streets of Jerusalem. He is the 
 same loving, tender, condescending Jesus that He was then, 
 and will never deny Himself to any who feel their need of 
 Him. I am looking forward to my great change. Absent 
 from the hody, present with the Lord. The only thing worth 
 living for, is to be prepared for the full enjoyment of the glory 
 that is now prepared for all who come to Jesus. Come, just 
 as you are. Be assured of this, if you have one wish in your 
 heart to love Jesus, it is because He has first loved you ; and 
 the Holy Spirit is giving you the desire to wish to love Him. 
 Excuse all blunders. Make allowance for poor old eighty. I 
 am not far from my happy home, and it looks so inviting. Oh, 
 the welcomes ! oh, the joy ! oh, the meeting with those that 
 have gone before ! We meet to part no more for ever !" 
 
294 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXKLOW. 
 
 TO MISS S , ON RUNNING THE CHRISTIAN RACE. 
 
 "My DEAR Friend, — 
 
 " I have not forgotten my promise, to drop you a 
 line of remembrance. I have often thought of you, and my 
 hope abideth that you have really and truly set out on your 
 journey heavenward. May the Lord speed you on your 
 way. May He keep you, moment by moment, looking unto 
 Him who is your life. May you be led to see unceasingly 
 that this world is not worthy of one anxious thought. It is 
 all passing away, and we shall soon stand before the great 
 white throne. As you have commenced your journey, so go 
 forward. Do not rest where you are. We are on a race- 
 course. The point from which we start is conversion ; the 
 goal to which we run is heaven ; the prize for which we con- 
 tend is a crown of glory, which the righteous Judge will give 
 us at that great day. If, dear friend, you have started in this 
 race, So run that you may obtain. How few lay these great 
 things to heart! The world and its trifles so engross the 
 thoughts, that God and Christ, and eternity, with our vast 
 responsibility, are shut out of sight ; and Satan, the great foe 
 of mankind, gains his point, unless Sovereign grace interferes, 
 and opens the bhnd eye to see the danger, and Jesus the 
 Refuge. Oh, what a mercy of mercies to know all this, and 
 to act upon it ! Yet how many are satisfied with the form of 
 godliness, while they know nothing of its power. They go to 
 church, repeat many prayers, yet never feel sin a weight, a 
 grievous burden, nor shed one tear before God for having 
 sinned against Him. Oh, it is with a holy, heart-searching 
 God that we have to do. And the soul is of more value than 
 ten million worlds. What shall it profit a man if he gain the 
 ivhole world and lose his oicn soid? These are solemn, awful 
 truths ; but only by a few are they laid to heart. May the 
 Lord enable you to bring your heart to Him, who alone can 
 heal it thoroughly ; and may he lead you in the right way. I 
 believe that none will ever come to Jesus until they feel that 
 they are lost and undone in themselves. He came not to call 
 the righteous, but sinners to repentance. Oh, come as you 
 are — bhnd, wretched, helpless, and in that state cast your- 
 selves at the feet of Jesus, and He will not spurn you from 
 His presence. Read the third chapter of Jolm's gospel to all 
 whom you may find anxious about eternal realities. May you 
 
WAITING UPON GOD. 295 
 
 be made a blessing to many. A great work has been done in 
 you, and a great work is to be done by you. All who know 
 the Lord should let their light shine before men, that others 
 might be led to the true light. Oh, the mercy of being in the 
 right road — the narrow road, that leads to life eternal. Dear 
 friend, study your Bible with prayer for the teaching of the 
 Holy Spirit. Read the first and second chapters of Ephesians, 
 and pray over these precious portions of God's Avord, that the 
 Spirit may lead you into all the riclmess, fulness, and sweet- 
 ness therein ; that with an assured hope you might not only 
 go on your way rejoicing, but may also be instrumental in 
 leading others to examine for themselves. Oh, what is all the 
 grandeur, wealth, and honour of this fleeting world, compared 
 with the glory that awaits the believer in Jesus ? Kings and 
 queens pass away, and leave their crowns ; but the Christian 
 goes to his, and wears it through eternity — ever bright, ever 
 pure." 
 
 To an aged Christian, whose trembling faith her letters had 
 often nourished, and who, since her own departure, has gone 
 to unite with her in the song of the Lamb, she thus encourag- 
 ingly writes : — 
 
 TO LADY MARY F — , ON WAITING UPON GOD. 
 
 " Dear Sister in the Lord, — London, May 25, 1848. 
 
 " For as such I hail you. We are travelling fast, and 
 are nearing at every step our heavenly home. We shall both 
 see Jesus soon — oh, how soon ! — and know even as we are 
 known. All that he has spoken is confirmed truth. Then, let 
 us take Him at His word, believe it, and go on rejoicing in 
 Christ Jesus. What a mercy of mercies that He has conde- 
 scrmded to call us out of darkness into His marvellous light, 
 and to translate us into the kingdom of His dear Son ! What 
 do we not owe Him for this rich display of sovereign mercy ? 
 I often have to exclaim. Lord, why me? such a poor sinner 
 as I am to be brought nigh unto God — adopted into His fam- 
 ily — made an heir of God, and a joint-heir with Christ Jesus ? 
 Such are we in Him. Let us hold fast our oneness with 
 Christ, then we shall be better enabled to walk with God. 
 We are journeying to the inheritance which the Lord our God 
 has given to us, through a world crowded with temptations on 
 either side, which would divert us from the way, if it were 
 possible. Our %vorst foe. the body of sin and death, we bear 
 
296 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 about with us. But our Jesus is for us, and withal we can 
 sav, More are they icho art fur lis, than they ivho are against us. 
 God the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost, are on our side, and 
 these are Almighty . Dear friend, seeing these things are so, 
 what manner of persons ought we to be, in all manner of holy 
 conversation and godliness ! God be praised on your behalf, 
 that He has brought you so for. T\'e may not meet in this 
 vale uf tear.-, but I shall meet you above, and shall know you 
 amongst the goodly company that are around the throne upon 
 which Jesus sits, in all the majesty of heaven, waiting to wel- 
 come his pilgrims home. Let us endeavour to allure all we 
 love to join us on the way. I have just been bringing all 
 mine, one by one, to Him who is able to save to the uttermost. 
 I know something of His power and unparalleled love towards 
 poor sinners. Let us pray on for those who are dear to us. 
 Our God hears and answers prayer. On him let us wait, and 
 wait unweariedly until He answers. In waiting on Him for 
 those dear to us, we shall receive a blessing for our own soul. 
 We cannot approach Infinite Goodness without getting good. 
 And oh, how blessedly refreshing and in\'igorating is the lifting 
 up of the light of His countenance upon our wearv and tried 
 souls ! It is a wonder that we are not oftener at His gracious 
 footstool. What could we do in this poor dving world with- 
 out a throne of grace, and a Gt^d of grace upon the throne, in 
 our every time of need ? Oh, let us keep close to Him who 
 loved us with an everlasting love, and with loving-kindness 
 has drawn us to Himself. In waiting upon Him, let us not 
 be satisfied without the feeling that His ear is hearkening to 
 us. This is very important — I must feel that he hears me, the 
 blessed Spirit bearing witness with my spirit that God, even 
 my God and Father, hears his poor child's pleadings. This is 
 the pri^-ilege of all the dear family of God. To each one He 
 says, Ask% that your joy may he full. He upbraids His disci- 
 ples for asking so little ; AsJc what you icill in my name, and 
 it shall be done unto you. There He sits at the right hand of 
 God, to make intercession for us. He is waiting to be gra- 
 cious. Let us, then, trim our lamps, that at His coming we 
 may be found quite ready. The Lord bless you with much of 
 His sensible presence, is my prayer." 
 
EXCOURAnEMEXTS TO PRAYEE. 297 
 
 TO MRS. W . ENCOURAGEMENTS TO PRAYER. 
 
 " My Dear Christian Friend. — Nov. 24. 
 
 '* . . .1 trust the Lord will in due time answer 
 Tour prayers, as it respects your dear children. All power is 
 mine, says Christ, in heaven and on earth. Oh, the mighty 
 power of prayer with God our Father, in the name of His 
 beloved Son ! We must get to heaven before we know what 
 that power has been in its fullest sense. Command ye vie. 
 Oh, the luxury of prayer ! "We have intercourse truly, famil- 
 iar intercourse with God. To talk with God. To go and shut 
 the door, and tell God all, all that is in our heart. To feel 
 that He is listening to hear what we have to say to Him ; and 
 then to wait and see what He will say to us. Dear friend, 
 such, as you know, is the privilege of all the saints. It may 
 be long ere you see your prayers answered ; for faith must be 
 brought into exercise ; and often, when we are ready to give 
 all up, then the Lord comes, and, although in a very different 
 manner to what we expected. He answers our prayers, and 
 puts our unbelief to the blush. Oh, to have such a God to 
 deal with, and to know that He is always deahng with us in 
 His providence and by His Spirit ! Glorious is our high call- 
 ing in Christ Jesus. It is He who says, ^Ask anything in my 
 name, and I will do if.' Is anything too hard for mef saith 
 the Lord. What could I do with such a heavy charge laid 
 upon my heart, if I had not such a God to deal with ? Fifty- 
 seven immortals, bearing my name, do I think of, and pray 
 for. Some are converted, others still in nature's darkness. Is 
 there not work enough here for one poor pilgrim ? But such 
 is the power of the Most High, and such the fulness of Christ, 
 and such the boundless love of God in Jesus, that I am greatly 
 encouraged to make large demands upon Him in the dear and 
 all-prevailing name of His own Son and of my own Saviour. 
 So you see I would try to encourage you, too, to pray on, and 
 
 to expect an answer when your faith is fully tried 
 
 I have been greatly exercised as to the path of duty for . 
 
 But I gave myself to prayer, which, in all circumstances, ad- 
 verse or otherwise, is my stronghold. I can find my way to 
 the heart of God, when I cannot elsewhere do good, or shape 
 things as I would Avish. He is, and ever has been, a present 
 help to me in all my troubles, trials, and adversities. I would 
 not now have been without them all. It was in love He dealt 
 
298 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 with me. . . . This is the God I have now to do with, 
 day by day, moment by moment. I rest on His loving, Fa- 
 therly care ; and no tongue can tell the rich enjoyment of sit- 
 ting in all tlie helplessness of infancy at His feet, and know 
 that He is listening to all I would say to Him, and all that I 
 would need to say, though unexpressed. Oh, how few really 
 know God ! I meet with many hearsay Christians, who have 
 heard of Jesus, as Job did, with the hearing of the ear, but 
 who have no personal acquaintance with Him. They have 
 never come to Christ as poor, wretched, blind and naked ; and 
 therefore they know nothing of that peace which the applica- 
 tion of the atoning blood alone can impart. They have never 
 come in contact with Christ. They only believe what others 
 say of Him, and know nothing of a blessed recognition, a 
 oneness, and a holy intercourse between Jesus and the poor 
 sinner, saved by sovereign grace, and eternal, everlasting love. 
 Pray on ; wrestle with Christ." 
 
 TO THE SAME, ON THE OXFORD TRACTS. 
 
 "The Lord, I believe, is answering prayer by all these 
 things that at present alarm us. I have long regarded the 
 church, the one church, composed of all the chosen of God, as 
 comparable to a house out of order, with nothing in its right 
 place ; so that it has been my constant prayer, ' Lord, when 
 wilt Thou come and set Thine own hand to the work, putting 
 down the work of men, and causing Thine own ordinances to 
 be duly honoured ?' When the ' Oxford Tracts' first made 
 their appearance, I remarked that the Lord was about to com- 
 mence His own work, in His own way. That Baptismal Re- 
 generation would do it. From that moment I have been 
 watching events : and when the Papal Aggression came, it 
 gave me no alarm. Jesus reigns. Oh, that He would appear 
 in this awful state of confusion, and cause His own people to 
 come out of Babylon, shake off the dust from their feet, and 
 separate themselves from the ungodly. The Lord is about to 
 do a great work, and what we have to do is to humble our- 
 selves before Him on account of the abominations of the land. 
 I believe that His hand is in this ^Aggression,' — in the con- 
 fusion that confounds our senators, and in all that is now going 
 forward ; and if we watch and pray, we shall see it plainer 
 and plainer. My soul rejoices in God my Saviour, and I have 
 no fears nor misgivings. My prayers are about to be answered, 
 
HEAVEN, AX INCENTIVE TO PERSEVERANCE. 299 
 
 and the one elect church will be purified from all the dross, 
 and will stand forth fair as the moon, clear as the sun, and ter- 
 rible as an army icith lanners. I have had a blessed praying 
 time this morning, and could open my mouth wide, and ask 
 great things concerning His one church. Thirteen ladies have 
 engaged to meet every morning, at eight o'clock, in united 
 prayer for the Queen. Oh, I do know something of the mighty 
 power of prayer, particularly united prayer. In the midst of 
 all the public excitement, my little bark is riding serenely 
 through the storm, and soon I shall drop my anchor in the still 
 waters of eternal rest and glory." 
 
 "... I feel that one reason why many real Christians do 
 not go on their way rejoicing, is, that they deify the humanity 
 of Christ. They feel they are coming to a holy God, who 
 cannot look at sin without infinite displeasure ; and this view 
 of Jesus repels and throws them back. Whereas Jesus is the 
 very same Jesus now that He was when He walked the streets 
 of Jerusalem. Though His body is glorified, He is not altered. 
 His heart is still the same, full of sympathy and love, ready to 
 listen to all we have to say to Him, and to do all w^e ask Him 
 to do, and in the best possible w^ay. Precious Jesus ! is He 
 not altogether lovely ? He is everything to my soul. Life 
 were an aching void without Him. Now and then He lifts 
 the veil, and gives me a blessed glimpse of the glory that 
 awaits me and all who love His appearing." 
 
 TO MRS. C , ON HEAVEN, AN INCENTIVE TO 
 
 PERSEVERANCE. 
 
 " Dear Friend London, Feb. 10th, 1840. 
 
 " How is it with the poor body, and how is it with 
 your precious soul ? Looking forward, I trust, to your blessed 
 meeting with Him, who so loved you as to die that you might 
 live with Him in that place He has gone to prepare for you. 
 Only think of this ! Jesus is above, and is ready to welcome 
 you home. Let us hourly realize this, — realize heaven, with all 
 its glories. Your dear sister stands ready, amongst many 
 more, to welcome you there. And more than all, and above 
 all, is Jesus, wath a countenance radiant with love, prepared 
 to rejoice over every emancipated soul that leaves this world 
 of sin and sorrow, to enter into the enjoyment of w^hat He has 
 prepared for it. And behold the goodly company around the 
 throne ; and believe, that if there is joy in heaven among the 
 
300 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 angels of Grod over a sinner that repenteth, there is also a joy 
 among saints and angels over every released saint that reaches 
 heaven at last. Glory to Him who hath done such great 
 things for us ! "When Lazarus departed, angels attended him, 
 nor left him until they bore him to Abraham's bosom. I be- 
 lieve this is the case with all who love the Saviour. They are 
 absent from the body, and that same moment they are present 
 with the Lord. What rapture to fall at His feet, and to hear 
 Him say, Come^ ye blessed of my Father I Oh, that the saints 
 of God would live more in the anticipation of the glory that 
 awaits them ! There is much of heaven to be enjoyed even 
 on earth. Let us live, too, more in holy familiarity with 
 Jesus. Nothing is too much beneath His notice. As dear 
 old Mr. John Newton says, 'If the buzzing of a fly is an an- 
 noyance to us, it is our privilege to carry it to Jesus.' 
 
 " The question again recurs, how is it with your soul? Are 
 your prospects growing brighter and brighter as you travel on ? 
 Do you find Jesus nearer and more precious day by day ? 
 "What progress have you and I made ? We have had our 
 conflicts, our wanderings and backslidings many ; but still on- 
 Avards we must go. There is no standstill in this journey. We 
 know less or more of Christ than we did a year ago. Tell 
 me when you saw Him last, and how you feel in the prospect 
 of soon being with the beloved One for ever and ever. I am 
 not happy here without Him, and should be miserable indeed, 
 were I not quite sure of seeing and dwelling with Him in glory. 
 Jesus is all in all to my soul, and life would be wearisome in- 
 deed were it not so. He makes up the sum of my happiness 
 here, and will be my joy, my life, and my glory hereafter. 
 Dear friend, let us speed more our journey, nor loiter in the 
 way. I must conclude. The Lord is prospering His work 
 amongst us." 
 
 TO MISS C , ON THE INTERCESSION OF CHRIST. 
 
 " I am sitting in my quiet room, beloved friend, where I 
 have been blessing and praising God for His ten thousand, 
 thousand mercies, in giving me such an all-sufficient Saviour 
 and precious Intercessor as His beloved Son. Having taken 
 a body like our own, though free from all taint of sin. He is 
 both able and willing to make intercession for us with a holy, 
 holy Lord God, wlio cannot but behold sin with infinite dis- 
 pleasure. What a mercy for such as we are, who feel tlie 
 
THE GOODNESS OF GOD. 301 
 
 taint of sin in all we do and saj, to be enabled to present all 
 our petitions in the dear name of God's Son, with whom the 
 Father is ever well pleased ! Such an intercessor was need- 
 ful. God has said to Jesus, ' If thy children backslide^ I luill 
 chasten them with the rod ; nevertheless my loving -kindness will 
 I not utterly take from them, nor suffer my faithfulness to failj 
 We often sin, and deserve a Father's rod ; but Jesus, at the 
 right hand, prays, ^Father, forgive them! Such is Jesus tc 
 us, making intercession moment by moment, and presenting 
 all our petitions in His own blessed name. Is not this most 
 blessed ? Does it not give us an inexpressibly endearing view 
 of Jesus, our elder Brother, our Brother born for adversity? 
 
 And now I am going to tell you good news. Dear W is 
 
 converted. He has found Jesus precious to his soul. 
 It is a mercy to see any asking their way to Zion, with theii 
 faces thitherward. I believe that God is about to work like 
 Himself; and to overturn, overturn, and overturn, to accom 
 plish His own blessed will. Let us, who are of the day, watch 
 and pray. Who would not live for eternity ? Is it not strange 
 that we can for one moment lose sight of heaven, and the in- 
 creasing glory, as long as the existence of God Himself, and 
 grovel in the dust to gather pebbles, for the pleasure of throw- 
 ing them afterwards away ? Man walks in a vain show, and, 
 blindfolded, goes down to the grave unsaved ! Join me in 
 praising God for His great and distinguishing mercy to us, in 
 opening our eyes, and leading us to His beloved Son, that we 
 might be saved with a sure and everlasting salvation. Let us 
 keep close to Jesus, and pray for each other. I thank you 
 again for the nice help to my blind eyes. The spectacles are 
 always at my side." 
 
 TO THE SAME. 
 
 " I have written to you of the Lord's goodness to us in the 
 
 conversion of W . The Lord is good indeed. My soul 
 
 rejoices in God my Saviour. Let us ever trust Him for His 
 unchanging and unchangeable love. From everlasting to 
 everlasting He has loved us ; and all the varying dispensations 
 of His loving providence are only to prepare us more completely 
 f jr the place He is now preparing for us. Let us aim to see 
 Him in all things, and to have Him ever present with us. 
 How sweet to walk through the wilderness v.-ith our hand in 
 His hand, feeling that He is leading us safely along tl^e 
 
302 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 narrow road that leads to everlasting life! Dear friend, may- 
 Jesus be more and more precious to you and me. Cannot jou 
 repeat from your heart these lines with me ? 
 
 Is there a thing beneath the sun 
 That strives with thee my heart to share ? 
 
 Ah ! take it thence, and reign alone, 
 The Lord of every motion tliere. 
 
 Then shaU my heart fi-om earth be free, 
 
 When it hath found repose in thee." 
 
 " None but Jesus can make us happy here and hereafter. 
 Only^ believe, and wait the time when we shall more fully 
 understand this great mystery of godliness. Oh, the glorious 
 prospect that is before the feeblest child of God ! Look often 
 at your inheritance. Take your walks in the garden of love 
 above. See Jesus there, no longer wearing a crown of thorns, 
 but a diadem of glory, in the very same body He carried up 
 with liim. There is your dear sister among the number, and 
 oh, how many that I love who are waiting to welcome me 
 home ! Dear friend, realize it. It will tend to strengthen your 
 faith, and brighten your hope. My loving love to your cousin.'* 
 
 TO HER SON O , A MOTHER's PRAYERS. 
 
 " I have just had an interview with the Lord our 
 
 God, and a blessed one it has been to my soul. And do you 
 think I forgot you all ? Oh, that the Lord might be to you 
 what He was to the family at Bethany — the Martha, and the 
 Mary, and the Lazarus, whom He loved ! I have been asking 
 great things for you all; for, while He held out the sceptre, 
 my heart was full, and my mouth opened wide to ask much 
 for you all, and all whom God has given me. Oh, what a 
 mighty privilege is the believer's — to have holy^ intercourse 
 with, and blessed access to, the God of heaven ! May we 
 never lose sight of it, but ask much, and expect what w-e ask 
 for. God is leading us in a right way to the New Jerusalem 
 above ; and all we have to do is, to keep a steady eye upon 
 Him ; for, be assured, He will never leave nor forsake us. 
 All is true, as God is true. Keep your eye intently upon Him. 
 Take no step without Him. Beware of forming plans in your 
 owm mind, and then coming to ask counsel of God. Never 
 let us forget that God has to do with us every moment of our 
 existence, and we ought to liave to do with Him. We are 
 not to he like the world around us, but to walk humbly and 
 
CHRISTIAN UNION. 303 
 
 closely with God. Blessed be His name, he gives me at times 
 such blessed access to Him, that I can testify it is real, it is 
 true. Mj soul seems swallowed up in God. I feel heaven so 
 near, that I am almost in the actual presence. Yes, Jesus is 
 above. Our own Joseph lives, and for you and for me He 
 has said it, and I believe it. Oh, I do think He will give us a 
 revivah He will do again what he has once done. What 
 blessed nearness to Himself He gave me one morning when I 
 descended from my room, and said ' Look out for the Lord, for 
 He is near you ! ' Oh, may He appear once again for us, and 
 revive His work in all our souls, and in His churches! How- 
 do I long to see it ! To-day He has given me fresh testimony 
 of his unchanging love, and that He is near to us, oh, how 
 near ! May he suffer no root of bitterness to spring up among 
 us, and the Spirit be grieved, and the work be hindered. God 
 be gracious to us, and come and bless us ! We cannot do 
 without Him, for He is our joy, our hfe, our all. Without 
 Him, the world, and all it calls good, is a wretched wilderness ; 
 with Him, a wilderness can be a paradise to our souls, and a 
 little heaven below." 
 
 TO THE SAME ON CHRISTIAN UNION. 
 
 " Wednesday Evening. 
 " You are just now preaching, and I have been praying for 
 you again and again. I am alone in the drawing-room. I 
 was just thinking, after reading about the Evangelical Alli- 
 ance, could you not write a work on the Unity of the Church, 
 grounding your subject on the passage, Love ye one another, as 
 I have loved you ? Love to the brethren springs from the love 
 of God in the renewed soul. This love surpassing all creature 
 love, and enkindled by the indwelling of the Holy Ghost, 
 must necessarily unite the one family of God. If the Holy 
 Spirit dwells in me, when communicating with another, who 
 also is a temple of the Holy Ghost, the Spirit within me will 
 surely acknowledge His own image in the other, and love will 
 necessarily flow out towards the individual. Therefore the apostle 
 says. We knoiv that we have passed from death unto life, hecause 
 we love the brethren. If the Lord lay this subject with power 
 on your mind, and open it to you, so that you can write upon 
 it, it may be a great blessing to the church of God. The love 
 of Christ to His saints is to be the measure of their love to 
 one another." 
 
304 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 TO MRS. H , ON THE INFINITE LOVE OF CHRIST. 
 
 "Dear Friend, — January 17. 
 
 " I must not forget to wish you a ' happy new year,' in 
 the best sense of the word. Oh, that in this new year, you 
 and I might grow in grace and in the knowledge of Jesus 
 Christ more rapidly than we have hitherto done ! Thus we 
 shall grow in meetness for our heavenly inheritance. Christ 
 has gone to take possession of heaven in our behalf. He 
 would not delegate this to the highest angel in glory. He 
 knew that He was the fittest One to do this. It was love, 
 infinite love, that brought Him down to earth. It was infinite 
 love that led Him to pass through the tremendous conflict, 
 when He grappled with death, hell, and the grave. It was 
 infinite love that sustained Him in it, and that brought Him 
 out of it a royal Conqueror. It was infinite love that bore 
 Him back to heaven, where he is now, and where we shall be 
 also. Oh, for this hope, this good hope, through grace, let our 
 hearts abound with holy love towards Him. 
 
 "And now, what have we to do here, but to glorify Him 
 who has done such great things for us ! The influenza has 
 been raging, and many, strong and healthy, have been sum- 
 moned into eternity What a stormy life is this ! 
 
 Gale after gale, all to show us that this is not our rest, but that 
 a better awaits us, even a heavenly. Who would live away? 
 Who would desire to dwell on these lower grounds, where 
 sickness and sorrow, the sad consequences of sin, follow in our 
 wake ? In heaven, our happy home, we shall enjoy perfect 
 holiness and perfect happiness. Oh, that you and I might live 
 for that, towards which time is so rapidly hurrying us ! Dear 
 friend, keep close to Jesus and a throne of grace. If you feel 
 your heart cold, go at once, and He will warm it. If you feel 
 it hard and impenitent, go, and He will soften and awaken it 
 to sweet contrition. Go, under all circumstances and with all 
 frames. All your difficulties, however small or however great, 
 you have a right to bring to Jesus, casting all your care upon 
 Iliin^ for He careth for you. Dear friend, Jesus wants you and 
 me to live more upon Him, like little helpless children. I 
 hardly know how to dismiss this darling theme, so full of con- 
 solation is it. May the Lord bless and keep you very near 
 Himself" 
 
DEATH OF A CHILD. 305 
 
 TO MRS. C. G , ON THE DEATH OF A CHILD. 
 
 " My dear Friend, — Sept. 9, 18.30. 
 
 " I was not aware, until I called to inquire after you 
 this (v.-ning, that the Lord had taken your little one. My 
 heart tenderly sympathizes with you; for I know, by sad ex- 
 perience, what the feelings of a bereaved mother are. May 
 the Lord be gracious to you, and whisper sweetly to your 
 heart, 'All is well!' He has mercifully housed your sweet 
 flower, and when you get above you will find him there, 
 blooming in eternal youth. We know not when our little 
 ones are so early removed, from Avhat evil a gracious God has 
 taken them. He sees the end from the beginning ; we cannot 
 discern a single step. How much better, then, to leave all in 
 His dear hands, who loves them better than we can, and be- 
 cause He loves them, takes them home. All His dispensations 
 are designed to draw us closer to Himself, and He would re- 
 move every object that comes between Him and us. Your 
 faith, as well as mine, has been sharply tried ; but Jesus is 
 watching us both, and not one trial too much shall we have. 
 His loving eye is upon you ; let yours be up to Him. Call 
 upon me in the day of trouble, and I loill deliver thee, and thou 
 sJialt glorify me, is a promise which has been worth untold gold 
 to me. I never knew it to fail. If He did not remove the 
 trouble in my way, He did so in a far better way. I have 
 felt for you, and have brought your case before the Lord. 
 May he sanctify abundantly the discipline of the covenant. 
 Whom he loves He chastens. Let us make sure work for 
 eternity. There are some who take these things for granted. 
 Now in a matter of such tremendous importance, God is 
 too good to leave us to an uncertainty. There is such a thing 
 as knoiuing that our sins are forgiven, and having the witness 
 of the Spirit with ours that this is the case. Look not so much 
 within for evidences, as to Christ, who has done the great, the 
 mighty work for us who believe with all our heart unto salva- 
 tion. The Lord bless you." 
 
 TO MISS B , ON THE SOLEMNITY OF DEATH. 
 
 *' My dear Friend, — Feb. 17. 1851. 
 
 " . . .1 cannot but feel that it is a solemn thing 
 to hear that one is so soon to enter the eternal world before 
 me, so much younger than myself. And vet this awaits us 
 
306 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 all ; and blessed is the thought, that if we are really what we 
 profess to be, we may rejoice when tli£ summons comes to 
 bring us home to God. In a little while, and we shall meet 
 to go no more out for ever. Should not this make us to rejoice 
 in the prospect before us, and cause us to trim our lamps afresh, 
 and be quite ready when the message comes ? It is a solenm 
 thing to die ; and yet how few are thoroughly prepared for it ! 
 May we be found in readiness ; this only can be as we are 
 living and walking with the Lord. Death, to the believer, is 
 but passing out of a world of sorrow and sin, and entering 
 upon a world of indescribable glory. If we lived more in an- 
 ticipation of the happiness that awaits us, earth would have 
 less hold on our heart's best affections. Love to all." 
 
 TO MISS M. H. . LIGHT IN SPIRITUAL DARKNESS. 
 
 " Leamington, March 28th. 
 " Dear Sister in a most precious Jesus, — 
 
 " I must address you thus. Although a stranger to 
 3'ou, I am not a stranger to Him who loves you, nor a stranger 
 to the road you are now treading. As an old pilgrim, who 
 has walked the narrow way for many years, and has passed 
 through many trials and changes, I tliought I would drop you 
 a line ; and perhaps the Lord may make it a comfort to your 
 soul, which will not prevent my son, when he is more at leis- 
 ure, from giving you his views of your case. The Holy Ghost 
 IS leading us — sees fit to guide us just as, in His own wisdom, 
 He sees best for our advancement in the Divine life. As I 
 have in some measure trodden the dark path you now tread, I 
 may be qualified to speak a word in season to you. The 
 changes — oh, many there are ! — through which the believer 
 passes, are richly calculated to mature his graces, to confirm 
 him in the truth of the Bible, and render Jesus more precious. 
 AVe are to follow on to know the Lord ; and, in proportion as 
 we know Him, we shall trust in Him in the dark day as well 
 as in the bright noon-day, when the sun of His blessed counte- 
 nance is upon us. But although your way is now dark, there 
 is no necessity why you should remain in darkness. The ear 
 of our loving Father is open to the cry of His child, and His 
 heart is ever towards you. He delights to hear you always; 
 and a sigli, a groan, a desire, is iyrayei\ though you utter not a 
 word. Besides, a throne of grace is ever at hand ; and, as you 
 Bay you cannot prav, go and tell Jesus. Keep nothing back 
 11 
 
LIGHT IX SPIKITUAL DARKNESS. 307 
 
 from your dearest and best Friend. He requires an open 
 heart. He has given you His^ and He asks yours in return. 
 Have no secrets with Him, and He will have no secrets with 
 you. Whatever your feelings, no matter how bad, take them 
 to Him ; for He has engaged not only to save you from all 
 evil, but to save you from yourself. 
 
 " It is no uncommon thing for God's beloved ones, dear to 
 Him as the apple of His eye, to walk sometimes in spiritual 
 darkness. Who is among you that fear eth the Lord., that oheyeth 
 the voice of His servant, that lualketh in darhiess, and hath no 
 light ! Let him trust in the name of the Lord, and stay upon his 
 God. Not many years ago, I was called to walk in much 
 darkness, after a long and blessed period of sweet, holy, and 
 uninterrupted enjoyment of His presence. I was greatly dis- 
 tressed. I searched diligently for the cause, and I saw clearly 
 enough why the Lord should have hid from me the light of 
 His countenance. In a little while, I felt I must flee from 
 myself to Jesus. I humbled myself before Him, confessed my 
 sins, and gave Him no rest until He appeared for me again, 
 and restored me to the sweet enjoyment of His presence. This 
 He did. Oh, the blessings of importunate prayer ! Think of 
 the wonderful condescension of God, to say to us, ' Command 
 ye me.' Will He withhold any good thing from us ? You will, 
 perhaps, reply, 'not if we walk uprightly.' Well, if we have 
 not, let us go and tell Him so. Confession of sin is one of the 
 sweet, holy, and profitable exercises of the soul. It endears us 
 to Christ, and endears Christ to us. It brings us into a broken- 
 hearted, contrite communion with a loving, sympathizing Sav- 
 iour, purifies the heart, and keeps the conscience tender and 
 watchful. Have I said enough, without wearying you, to induce 
 you to go at once to Jesus, and lay bare your whole heart be- 
 fore Him ? He waits to be gracious. You need not be long 
 in darkness. Fervent, importunate prayer will bring light into 
 your soul, and Jesus, with all the tenderness and compassion 
 of His nature, will show you He is yours, and that you are 
 His through time and eternity. J, the Lord, change not. We 
 change, everything around us changes ! but our gracious God 
 and Father changes not. Go to Jesus, and all will be well. 
 When He visits you, let me know, that I may praise Him on 
 your behalf." 
 
308 MEMOIR OF MIlS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 to miss r . the superlative excellence of curist. 
 
 "Dear Friend, — 
 
 "What a high and holy privilege it is to walk in 
 the fear of the Lord all the day long ! And not in the fear of 
 God only, but also in the love of the Spirit. I have sensible 
 access to God. To listen to His still, small voice, and to feel 
 an echo to it in our hearts, is not this a mighty privilege, worth 
 a thousand worlds like this ? What is all the pomp and glory 
 of this dying world, compared with five minutes' such com- 
 munion with the Holy Lord God, manifesting Himself in the 
 face of Jehovah-Jesus? Beloved, this is your privilege and 
 mine. God, in His rich mercy, causes us to enjoy it every 
 day, and all the day long. What could we do in this world 
 of manifold temptations, had we not a God to go to, ever ready 
 to be a present help ? Suffer no distance to arise between you 
 and your best friend. He has undertaken for us in all things. 
 We want Him as our Counsellor, as our Guide, as our Pro- 
 tector, as our Deliverer, in ten thousand ways. How needful 
 and how sweet to be ever sitting at His feet, looking up and 
 meeting His eye bending down upon us in love ! I took my 
 pen to address you, and my thoughts ran into this subject; my 
 heart filled, and I could not but express what was passing 
 there. Jesus is indeed very precious to my soul. All creature 
 love sinks into nothing before it. If ever a mother loved her 
 children, I have ; but what are they, or all their love, com- 
 pared to Jesus ? The more I see of the fulness, the boundless 
 love of Christ, the more I sink in the dust of self-abasement 
 before Him. 
 
 " And now you are in the house of mourning. If the dear 
 mother is safely landed, blessedly housed in the mansion long 
 prepared for her, should it not be a house of joy ? In her 
 Father's house above, at home with God, freed from all pain, sin, 
 and sorrow for ever, saved from the evil to come. What joy 
 were this ! Heaven is a i^lace^ and a place of the most perfect 
 enjoyment ; and the presence of Jesus makes it all that an im- 
 mortal soul can desire. Its happiness, too, is ever increasing, 
 as well as the capacity of the soul expanding, to receive and 
 enjoy an ever-growing knowledge of God. Were our faith 
 but stronger, we should clap our hands when our dear ones 
 were taken to their heavenly home, and say, with Mrs. Isabella 
 Graham, 'I wish you joy!' May the Lord comfort your 
 
THE NEARNESS OF HEAVENLY SPIRITS. 309 
 
 hearts, and fill up the void He has made amongst you, and 
 cause you to rejoice." 
 
 TO HER SOX . 
 
 " London, Wednesday. 
 "... We returned yesterday from Taplow. The Lord 
 brought me in safety here again. May He condescend to use 
 me for Himself the little space that is now allotted me here 
 below ! It seems as if my time hitherto had gone to waste, 
 and I had been an unprofitable servant. May the Lord for- 
 give, and grant me all the grace I need to do His will ! I 
 
 was glad to find your interesting letter. Mrs. W called 
 
 yesterday, I gave her the work on the ' Recognition of the 
 Saints in Glory,' of which she is doubtful, and fears it leads to 
 carnality. She says the ' Glory of the Redeemer ' is a great 
 source of comfort to her. I have just been pleading with the 
 
 Lord to make the books a great blessing to the . All 
 
 hearts are in the hands of Him with whom we have to do. 
 He can bless them. Oh, how many things I have to ask Him 
 for ! and I believe He hears me always. There is never a 
 work to be done, but Satan will endeavour to raise up an ad- 
 versary. I have just been reading the Lord's deliverance 
 wrought for Hezekiah when the Assyrian king came upon 
 him. He is the same God now, never having changed since 
 Adam fell. Hezekiah's God is our God. Let us encourage 
 our hearts in the Lord, and keep close to a throne of grace. 
 Take care of your health." 
 
 TO E. AND M. W . ON THE NEARNESS OF HEAVENLY 
 
 SPIRITS. 
 
 " Dear Friends, — March 10. 
 
 "Why have I not heard from you for so long a time? 
 How is it with your poor bodies, and, above all, how is it with 
 your precious souls — souls that Jesus loves, and for whom He 
 shed His precious blood? Oh, may we never forget what it 
 cost the Son of God to redeem us from endless perdition. We 
 must remember from what we are redeemed, and to what we 
 are redeemed. Eternal woe would have been our portion in 
 infinite justice ; but now eternal felicity will be our portion, 
 and that, too, on the ground of infinite justice. Bless the 
 Lord for His wondrous goodness in providing such a plan, by 
 which He could be a just God, and a holy God, and yet save 
 lost and rebellious man. Help me to praise, and let us en- 
 
310 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 courage each other to love Him more, day by day. I want to 
 love Him to-day better than I did yesterday, and so through 
 an endless eternity. Dear friends, how little, in general, do 
 we think of these things ! The trifles of a day, yea, of an 
 hour, occupy our thoughts, and cause us to grovel here below. 
 Gladly would my soul be on the wing, ready to mount upwards 
 at His bidding. In a little while, and we shall see Him as 
 He is. We know not how soon. The heavenly world is all 
 around us, and could we leave the clay, we should behold the 
 air filled with the heavenly messengers sent down to minister 
 to us, and to guard us from the evil power of darkness. Oh, 
 the care of the Good Shepherd ! His wakeful eye is ever 
 upon us, and His loving heart is ever towards us. 
 
 " . . . Since I last wrote I have had a severe attack of 
 influenza. It is the Lord, and a part of the discipline of the 
 covenant. . . . And now I must hasten to close. Let us 
 take courage, and press onward, keeping our happy home in 
 view. In a little while, and we shall be there. Let me hear 
 from you both. I hope the dear invahd is better. Never 
 mind. We shall have new bodies, more beauteous than the 
 brightest angel in heaven, and standing, too, nearer to the 
 Saviour than they. Oh, I Avould encourage you both, dear, 
 dear sisters, and myself, too, in anticipating the glory that 
 awaits us ! . . . " 
 
 TO THE SAME ON TELLING JESUS. 
 
 "I have thought much of you both, beloved in the Lord, 
 and wished to tell you so, but we have been in much anxiety 
 on dear E 's account, who has had an attack of inflamma- 
 tion on the lungs. . . . was to have accompanied 
 
 his brother to New York on business, but her illness prevented, 
 and the steamer leaves to-day without them. So the Lord has 
 ordered it. Praise to His holy name, who hedges up our way, 
 sometimes with thorns. Oh, we shall see, when w^e arrive in 
 heaven, how wonderful has been the wisdom that has guided 
 us in all our journey through ! Only realize your oneness to 
 Him, then you may be quite certain that all that takes place, 
 small or great, is in that covenant that is ordered in all things 
 and sure. Nothing is uncertain with God. We walk by faith 
 in Him, and not by sight. Oh, carry all your wants to Him, 
 nothing doubting that He not only hears you, but is every 
 moment watching over you! All is well, and though dark 
 
A GOOD MINISTER OF CHRIST. 3ll 
 
 clouds come between, there is a bright h'ght behind them. Go 
 at once with your trouble, be. it Avhat it may;, nothing is too 
 trivial to carry to Him. In this you honour Christ, showing 
 you believe His words, Without me ye can do 7iothing. Now, 
 then, Jesus Avill do all things for you, and all things well. A 
 sparrow falls not to the groimd without Him. You are of 
 
 more value than many sparrows. E is better. Oh, it 
 
 has been, I trust, a time of deep searching of heart ! She 
 was left alone with God. Solemn thought ! "We often need 
 be compelled to turn aside with God, and hear what He wnll 
 say to us. "We want no intruders there. We want to speak 
 to God alone. Oh, doubt not that God does even now speak 
 to His saints by the still small voice of His Spirit, so that we 
 can respond, Speak, Lord, for thy servant heareth. He openeth 
 the ear to discipjline ; and how sweet it is to wait and listen, to 
 hear what God would say to us. Be not satisfied with pray- 
 ing, but wait for the answer, for it will come in some way. 
 Let me have a line, I always remember you (one time in the 
 day, perhaps,) in my prayers." 
 
 TO HER SOX O , ON A GOOD MINISTER OF CHRIST. 
 
 " How often it is, that while God is in His own way answer- 
 ing our prayers, unbelief will mist our eyes, and tempt us to 
 fret and repine at His dispensations, not thinking that this is 
 the way He takes to accomplish what Ave wish. Last Lord's- 
 day was very refreshing to my soul. I went into the sanctu- 
 ary, and then the Lord gave me a little insight into His doings. 
 . . . Do you recollect what I wrote to you, that a dear, 
 aged Baptist minister once remarked, that ' when God means 
 to make a man rich. He takes away his money ?' How often 
 we think we could do the Lord's work better than He can 
 
 Himself! F sent his carriage to take me to Mr. C 's 
 
 yesterday, where I spent most of the forenoon. What a dear, 
 precious Christian he is ! I think He is one of the most lovely 
 saints I ever met with. His gifts for the ministry are not 
 great, but what he has he honestly lays out in the service of 
 the Lord — his whole heart devoted to Him, and his whole hfe 
 a constant aim to glorify Him. Holy, upright, walking closely 
 with God, and evidently experiencing much of the approving 
 smiles of the Saviour. And although his holy fear of offend- 
 ing may incline a little at times to legality, it is yet a most 
 lovely spectacle to behold. He will receive a Well done, good 
 
312 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 and faithful servant, thou hast been faithful over a few things^ 
 enter thou into the joy of thy Lord. 
 
 "... Oh, to look into eternity, and in its light to see 
 the folly and madness of ungodly men. How do I long for 
 the end of all things ; for the coming of the Lord to put all 
 things straight ! for even the Church of Christ has wandered 
 far from the right way, and has greatly dishonoured her Head. 
 . . . I found it very sweet to meet at the Lord's Table. 
 
 Dear Mr. E recognised me, and gave me one or two of 
 
 his kind looks, but I was too much engaged with Him, who is 
 one ocean of love to my soul, to take much notice. He 
 returned thanks to the Lord for preserving me in the time of 
 danger, and for bringing me among them again. When will 
 
 the book be out ? I long to see it. Love to A and the 
 
 dear chicks." 
 
 to miss j , soothing thoughts in illness. 
 
 " Dear Friend and Sister, — 
 
 " I hear that you are not well. Do drop me, if only a 
 few lines, and tell me all about yourself. Oh, dear friend, the 
 world is one vast hospital filled with diseased inmates, and 
 only one class can ever hope for a perfect cure. We shall all 
 be well when we get above. This is not our rest, nor our 
 home. We seek a better, and, blessed be God, our best Friend 
 is preparing it for us. When we get there, we shall find it 
 far beyond our highest and most enlarged expectations. Oh, 
 help me to praise and bless His holy, holy name ! . . . . 
 There are seasons when, alone in my little sanctuary in this 
 house, I am favoured with such precious glimpses of the glory 
 that awaits the Christian, that I could shout aloud. It is all 
 true! The atmosphere between this world and the other 
 seems clearer and lighter, and but a step and I am there. 
 What a meeting around that great white throne, basking in 
 the glory emanating from the countenance of Him who so, 
 loved you and me as to live for us, to die for us, and to live 
 again, and to say, Because I live ye shall live also. Oh, let us 
 encourage each other in the way ! Our poor bodies, too, will 
 be raised again, glorious bodies, beautified and prepared for 
 the reception of the glorified spirit. The prospect is opening 
 fast before me. Satan would try hard to mystify, or withdraw 
 us from the simplicity of the Drecious Gospel. But let us 
 
TO A FRIEND, ON HER CONVERSION. 313 
 
 come to Jesus, and bring to Him all our cares, large and small, 
 and tell Him all that is in our hearts. 
 
 " P.S. I am still at L , and thank God for giving me 
 
 such a home for the little while I am here. I am fed with the 
 sincere milk of the precious Gospel, by him whom the Lord 
 gave me in infancy to nurse for Himself. I am watched over 
 with the tenderest care, as a babe that can do little for itself. 
 I have no care. I talk to Jesus, and tell Him all I wish and 
 all I want. Sweet to close the door, and admit Him to my 
 heart, confessing my sins again and again — the sins of my 
 Avhole life, as the Holy Spirit brings them to remembrance. 
 Repentance, I find, is not a thing once done, and ever after 
 done with. Oh no ! I go again and again, as sin arises in the 
 mind, lay myself at the feet of Jesus, there to confess, weep, 
 and love — no rebuke, all pardoned. Oh, the wondrous, the 
 ocean-like love of Jesus ! "\Ylio can fathom it ? Dear friend, 
 we can have some little glimpses elsewhere of Heaven. Cheer 
 up ! we shall meet above, and spend an endless eternity to- 
 gether. Oh, what a gathering there ! I love to anticipate it, 
 and do, in a measure, realize it. How beautiful they look 
 clothed in the wedding garment, clean and white, — the infinite 
 righteousness of Christ Himself Why should we not rejoice ? 
 Let not the enemy keep you back. "When he comes in like a 
 flood, go directly to Jesus, and He will fight your battles. 
 Let us pray for one another. Once more, farewell ! 
 
 * For us the Lord intends 
 
 A bright abode on high ; 
 
 The place where sorrow ends, 
 
 And nought is known but joy ; 
 With such a hope let us rejoice, 
 We soon shall hear the Bridegroom's voice.' " 
 
 TO MRS. C. W. J , ON HER CONVERSION. 
 
 ** My dear Friend, — 
 
 "Although so lately known to me, yet having seen 
 how blessedly Jesus — my Jesus and your Jesus — has drawn 
 you to Himself, I can and do rejoice over you as one of the 
 redeemed of the Lord, and a willing candidate for a crown of 
 glory. Oh, dear friend, let no man take your crown. Watch 
 and pray that you enter not into temptation. You and Christ 
 are one. You are now called out of the world's wide wilder- 
 ness, and you have taken up the cross to follow Jesus. Yoii 
 are now a soldier of the cross, and it is written, Fight the good 
 14 
 
314 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 fight of faith; lay hold of eternal life. AYhat an honour to be 
 called, as you have been, to own your Lord and Saviour be- 
 fore a gainsaying, Christ denying world ! For this you can 
 never be grateful enough, 
 
 " Oh, to grace l)o\v great a debtor 
 Daily I'm constrain'd to be ! 
 Let that grace. Lord, like a fetter, 
 Bind my wandering heart to thee." 
 
 Oh, that Jesus might indeed bind you to Himself with cords 
 of love ! Never forget that you and Jesus are one. All your 
 concerns are His concerns. All your cares are equally his 
 cares. Therefore you are to be careful for nothing, for He 
 careth for you. See what an honour it is to be a child of God, 
 and to have grace given to walk boldly forth and own Him as 
 your Saviour, Sovereign, and PViend. I do, indeed, rejoice 
 with you, and rejoice over you. Hold fost your profession. 
 You must expect to meet with scoffers, and those who would 
 lead you far from Jesus. But cling firmly to Him, and hold 
 fast to His word. I would say here, that confession of sin is 
 a most sanctifying exercise of the soul. When you feel in 
 your heart that you liaA'-e grieved the Spirit, at once confess it 
 to your dearest, best Friend ; and He will, by the application 
 of His own precious blood, not only give a sense of pardon, 
 and grace, but will strengthen your faith and confidence in 
 Himself. Do not forget this. It is of consequence that you 
 do not. Let me write to you as a tender mother would to her 
 beloved child. I have felt all this toward you. And oh, the 
 prayers I have offered up for you ! You will never know un- 
 til you get to glory. Let me meet you there, beloved friend. 
 I bear you in my best afiections. When you meet with suf- 
 ferings, remember your dear Lord met with such before you ; 
 and it is a great honour put upon you to be as He was in this 
 
 present evil world. I do not wonder that said that you 
 
 had ' united yourself to a vulgar religion,' for so said the mul- 
 titude when Jesus was on earth, and when the Apostles went 
 forth to preach Christ. The religion of Christ is not the relig- 
 ion of the world, but is in opposition to the world, and there- 
 fore the world will ever hate it and its followers. But there is 
 a cross Christ's true disciples have to take up. Ask the Lord 
 to strengthen, uphold, and comfort you. 
 
 " P.S. The following lines, dear friend, suit you : — 
 
SOUL DARKNESS. .315 
 
 'Jesus, I my cross have taken, 
 
 All to leave and follow Thee; 
 All things else for thee forsaken, 
 
 Thou from hence my all shalt be. 
 
 ' Perish every fond ambition, 
 
 All I've sought, or hoped, or knovm, 
 
 Yet how rich is my condition, 
 
 God and heaven are still my own ! 
 
 * Let the world despise and leave me, 
 
 It has left my Saviour too ; 
 Human hearts and looks deceive me, 
 Thou art not, like them, untrue. 
 
 * And whilst Thou dost smile upon me, 
 
 God of wisdom, love, and might. 
 Foes may hate, and friends disown me, 
 Show Thy face, and all is bright. 
 
 Go, thou eartlily fame and treasure, 
 Come disaster, scorn, and pain, 
 In 'J'hy service pain is pleasure, 
 With Thy favour loss is gain. 
 
 * I have call'd Thee, Abba Father, 
 
 I have set my heart on Tliee ; 
 Storms may howl, and clouds may gather, 
 All must work for good to me.' 
 
 "The enclosed Paper on 'Religious Progression," I had 
 printed. "We are to go forward. The Christian's watch-word 
 is — Follow on to know the Lord. You have just commenced 
 your heavenly race. You are to go on to know more of this 
 great and glorious salvation. May the Lord Jesus teach you, 
 and bless you w^ith much of His sensible presence." 
 
 to mr. w. d. l , in soul darkness. 
 
 "Dear Brother in Jesus, — 
 
 " I think I must write a line to you ; I have long 
 wished it, but did not know how to intrude myself upon you. 
 My dear son has sometimes given me a sight of your kind 
 letters, which has led me to lift up my heart to the Lord in 
 heaven to bless you, and to cause His face to shine upon you, 
 filling you with joy and peace in believing. The love of God's 
 saints to each other is as far superior to the natural love of 
 relationship, or to the common friendship of the world, as the 
 heavens are higher than the earth. This love emanates from 
 God. It is a Divine cement that unites the one family of 
 
316 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 heaven. TVe know lue have passed from death unto life, because 
 lue love the hrethren. How sweet is tliis most precious evidence 
 of our sonship ! Hail it, dear friend, as a grand evidence of 
 God's eternal, everlasting love to you. I have passed my 
 threescore years and ten, and am looking out for the messenger 
 from my Father's house to bring me to my happy, blessed 
 home. It is almost in sight. I am favoured Avith some 
 precious glimpses of the glory that awaits me. . . . Oh, 
 to come to Jesus just as we would have done when He walked 
 with His disciples here below ! ' Precious Jesus, Thou Son of 
 God, bless my young friend, and lift up upon him the light of 
 Thy countenance, and say, It is I, be not afraid.^ My heart is 
 full of love towards you. I think I know a little of the road 
 by which the Lord is leading you at this moment. Oh, let us bow 
 our neck to the cross, for Jesus is walking with us every step 
 of the way ! . . . When tried, rush at once into the very 
 bosom of Christ, and feel the warm pulsations of His own 
 loving heart, and rest your head there. All will be well. He 
 is with you now, and will never leave nor forsake you. Pray 
 for us, and may the richest blessings rest upon you, beloved 
 friend.' 
 
 to e. s . encouragement to come to jesus. 
 
 "Dear Sufferer, — 
 
 " How have I thought of you since last evening; you 
 looked so ill ! My long letter, written some days ago, would 
 not, I fear, be of much comfort to your heart. But Jesus 
 loves you, and He will comfort you, I know. One glance of 
 His loving eye beaming upon your inmost soul will be all- 
 sufficient for your peace, and rich consolation under your 
 present suffering of body. The body is but the casement to 
 the jewel, which is rich and valuable enough to place in the 
 crown of Him Avho died and who rose again, and who at this 
 moment is seated on His throne in glory, waiting to welcome 
 all who feel their need of Him, and can do nothing for them- 
 selves. It is upon such, Jesus has His loving eye. While 
 you think you will try and do your best to please God, you will 
 find you will come short, and will be weary of your efforts. 
 But when you cast yourself, in all your helplessness, upon His 
 mercy and power, and His word which says. Come unto me, 
 all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I loill give you rest, 
 then, my beloved friend, you will find Jesus, the Saviour of 
 
THE DESIRE TO LOVE CHRIST PRECIOUS. 317 
 
 sinners, all that He has said He is, and ever will be, to every 
 needj one who looks to Him for help. A glance, a sigh, a 
 desire. He never, no never will overlook. His heart is one 
 ocean of love — love to sinners, as sinners, not as saints. He 
 loves the saints too, but He first loves them as poor, lost sinners, 
 that can do nothing for themselves, and who come to Him to 
 be saved. Oh, how welcome you are now, just in your present 
 state of mind, to the heart of Jesus ! His heart is yearning 
 over you at this present moment. I will say no more. I have 
 been to prayer for you, dear friend, for you are laid much upon 
 my heart." 
 
 TO THE SAME. THE DESIRE TO LOVE CHRIST PRECIOUS. 
 
 " Do not attempt to answer my note of yesterday ; there is 
 no necessity for it. I only thought I would give a word of 
 comfort in your trouble. The poor body's necessities call for 
 all your energies and patience, without having to write and 
 answer notes. Be assured of this truth, — you would never 
 have had a wish to love Jesus if He had not first loved you. 
 That love is divine in its character, and springs from the power 
 of the Holy Spirit. It never grew in nature's soil — it is above 
 and beyond fallen nature. It comes from Christ, and quick 
 returns are made to Christ. And if we have but one spark in 
 our souls, it will kindle into a holy flame. Oh, to be a living 
 member of Christ's living body ! We are the members, and 
 He is the Head, These are great mysteries, which you will 
 better understand as you travel on in the narrow road that 
 leads to the land of glory. Go with all you want to Jesus — 
 keep nothing back. Gro with all the simplicity of a babe, and 
 tell Jesus. He will bow down His loving ear, and listen to 
 all you have to say to Him. I must not weary you, but finish 
 with what I began with — that if you have the faintest wish 
 throbbing in your heart to love Jesus, it is one of the sweetest 
 evidences that you can have that He first loved you. Now, 
 the more you know Him, and have to do with Him, the more 
 you will love Him." 
 
 TO HER SON O , ON THE SUDDEN DEATH OF A DEAR 
 
 FRIEND. 
 
 " Saturday Evening. 
 " I received yours this afternoon. I saw, by the papers this 
 morning, that Mrs. Alers Hankey had gone to her happy 
 
318 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 home, and imaiediately wrote, as the Spirit led me, a word of 
 comfort to the afflicted daughters. She is safe, I have not the 
 shade v.- of a d;3iibt. She is with Jesus, Little faith can get to 
 heaven. It was a happy dismissal, just such a one as, in all 
 her w(aknes^ and trembling, suited her, sparing her much 
 bodily and mental suffering. How much do I see the tender 
 love and sy, apathy of Christ in deahng with her thus ! He 
 knew all h?r feebleness, and how Satan would attempt to 
 harass her in a lingering illness ; and so He took her away as 
 in a deep sleep ; and before she knew that she was dying she 
 was safely 1 .>dged within His loving bosom. Oh, the goodness 
 and gentleness of Jesus — our God-man Mediator ! How 
 beautiful does the tender sympathy of the manhood appear in 
 its union with the power and glory of the Godhead ! Such is 
 Christ to me. . . . Every now and then, the thought of 
 the gracious dealings of our God towards dear Mrs. Hankey, 
 as it respects her sudden and gentle dismissal, passes over me 
 with much sweetness ! What a realizing view it gives me of 
 the exquisite character of Jesus — His gentleness, tenderness, 
 and sympathy ! Oh, how enviable such a death ! Let me die 
 the death of the righteous, and let my last end he — just as He 
 would have it. Only would I say, ' Let me see Thy face all 
 through the dark valley.' My soul at this moment rejoices in 
 God my Saviour. He is all to me, living or dying. The last 
 time I saw dear Mrs. Hankey, she sat listening with the 
 deepest attention, and with tearful ej^es. And when we parted, 
 she kindly drew me towards her, and kissed me affection- 
 ately." 
 
 " Lord's-day. — This clause in one of the Psalms has been 
 very sweet to me to-day : For God is for me. What, then, 
 need the believer fear, here or hereafter ? This is His comfort. 
 Christ and he are one in time and in eternity. Looking into 
 'Bridge on Faith,' these words met my ej-e : 'Suffering times 
 are self-recollecting times.' And we may add, suffering times 
 are, or ought to be, fruitful, growing times. Every branch 
 that beareth fruit, He purgeth it that it may bring forth more 
 
 fruit. Oh, that it may be so with dear E and me ! I 
 
 have followed you Avith my prayers to-day, that the Lord 
 might heal the sick, strengthen the w^eak, and bless His own 
 word to saints and sinners. Love to all." 
 
 What pen could have given so faithful a delineation of her 
 elevated Christianity as her own has unconsciously presented 
 
THE REALITY OF TRUE RELIGION. 319 
 
 in the foregoing utterances of her heart ? The impression on 
 the mind of the reader must be, how real is true rehgion, and 
 how earnest is its spirit ! And yet tliere is nothing in that re- 
 ligion, as thus exhibited, that the lowHest subject of grace may 
 not experience. Precious is the sentiment with which the 
 chapter closes — " little faith can get to heaven." 
 
CHAPTER XIII. 
 
 "As the sunbeams united in a burning glass to a point 
 liave greater force than when they are darted from a plain 
 superfice, so the virtues and actions of one individual, drawn 
 together into a single story, strike upon our minds a stronger 
 and more Hvely impression tlian the scattered relations of 
 many men and many actions."* It is upon this principle of 
 concentration, for whose discovery we are indebted to the 
 Bible, that God has condescended to reveal Himself to man. 
 In the person of His Son He has so embodied the perfections 
 of His nature, and has so concentrated the beams of His 
 majesty, as to present in focal grandeur the "light of the 
 knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ." 
 In picturing the sunset of a life so prolonged and honoured of 
 God as that which these pages record, it will be our endeavour, 
 as that life approaches its close, thus to collect and concentrate 
 its retiring beams, intercepting them only so far as a gentle 
 hand may be required to guide them to the focus. It is a rich 
 autumnal sunset we are about to contemplate. The 'sear and 
 yellow leaf is falling thick and fast; but in the hngering fresh- 
 ness and fertility, the reader will be reminded of the character 
 appertaining to the aged godly, so beautifully delineated by 
 the sacred penman, — " The righteous shall flourish like the 
 palm tree : he shall grow like a cedar in Lebanon. Those 
 that be planted in the house of the Lord shall flourish in the 
 courts of our God. They shall still bring forth fruit in old 
 age ; they shall be fat and flourishing ; to shew that the Lord 
 is upright." It is the remark of an elegant writer, and the 
 sentiment is not less true than beautiful, — "Cheerful piety in 
 the decline of life, is like a tree which the storm has shattered, 
 but which yet retains much of the verdure of summer, and is 
 still the resort of the birds which sing among the branches." 
 
 * Addison. 
 [820J 
 
DIARY. 321 
 
 These pleasant characteristics of religion in old age will be re- 
 cognised in the extracts we proceed to make from Mrs. "Wins- 
 low's diary and correspondence, indicating an extraordinary 
 elevation of spiritual feeling, blended with a solemn yet radiant 
 consciousness of her nearness to the glory within which she 
 was soon to pass. Our first quotations are from the private 
 journal which has supplied us with so much rich material, but 
 which, alas ! is soon to receive its final record of a pilgrimage 
 from earth to heaven. 
 
 " Leamington. — I could never have believed that I should 
 have such nearness to Jesus, as I now, at times, enjoy. Read 
 this morning the twenty-first of John, from the 4th, particu- 
 larly pausing at the 12th verse, Jesus saith unto them, Come 
 and dine. His care. His forethought of His disciples, is now 
 just what it was when this circumstance took place. He had 
 watched the fruitless labour of His disciples through the night 
 — they had caught nothing. Just at this juncture, when 
 weary, discouraged, and hungry, He appeared. They needed 
 refreshment — He was not unmindful of it. Coals were kin- 
 dled — fish was laid thereon, bread was provided — nothing 
 omitted suitable to their wants. And then they were invited 
 to dine. They need not ask, Who art thou ? The multitude 
 of fishes they had caught at His word, the repast He had pro- 
 vided — the invitation He had given — all proclaimed who He 
 was — their dearest friend. Is it not so with thee, O my soul? 
 Has Jesus ever been unmindful of thy wants? Never, no 
 never. Always ready to supply my need. He has gone before 
 me in the wilderness, and prepared a table for me. Remem- 
 bering the thorn and the briar, He has made a narrow road for 
 , my feet, saying, Folloiv thou me ! Had I ever need to inquire. 
 Who art thou, Lord ? Did I not know Him ? Yes ! Even now 
 I feel His presence. I know the person, and I hear the voice. 
 How sweet, how cheering, how comforting ! To be with 
 Jesus, and to know it ! With such a visit have I been favoured 
 this day. Oh, what little things do worlds appear, when so 
 blessed ! W^ondrous in all His dealings has Christ been to me. 
 Chosen in Him before the foundation of the world, in due time 
 called, justified, sanctified, and shall be soon and eternally 
 glorified." 
 
 " The Lord does wonderfully seem to let heaven down into 
 my soul. I have no power to describe it. Then does heaven 
 i|-3elf seem so inviting, so attractive. I feel it but a step, and 
 14* 
 
322 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 I am in the midst of happiness, perfect and supreme. I have 
 asked the Lord not to send the grim, pale messenger for me, 
 unless he comes with him. I must see His own, well-known 
 face, ere I can welcome the summons. Oh, to be in His bosom, 
 there to rest without a fear or misgiving — to pass through that 
 dark valley in His own loving, Almighty arms, reposing upon 
 His very heart ! May this be my case. He so condescend- 
 ingly answers my poor prayers, and in a way so remarkable, 
 that were I to tell some individuals, they would declare it a 
 delusion. But I know otherwise. Every precious word He 
 has spoken is true. My soul rejoices in God my Saviour, my 
 Friend, my Father. I shall see Him — see Him as He is ; be 
 like Him ; dwell with Him through eternity, in perfect knowl- 
 edge, perfect purity, perfect happiness, perfect glory. Precious 
 Jesus, Thou knowest all things ; Thou knowest that I love 
 Thee. And though, like Peter, I have often wandered from 
 Thee, yet Thou hast never left me, nor denied Thyself. Glory 
 be to thy dear and holy name." 
 
 " How gracious, how transcendently good has the Lord been 
 to me this day ! The 20th Psalm was made a rich blessing to 
 my soul. How wonderfully does the Lord reveal Himself 
 through His own word to the heart and conscience of His 
 children ! Truly is His loving ear open to the faintest cry of 
 His feeble ones — such condescension in stooping to catch their 
 faintest breath of prayer ! Language seems to fail, when the 
 heart is thus filled with the Spirit, to express its deep emo- 
 tions — the feelings of a broken and a contrite spirit. Never, 
 no never, does sin appear so hateful as when the Lord comes 
 down to bless. Prostrate at His feet I fall, love and sorrow 
 so strangely mingled that they cannot be separated. Oh, for- 
 a close walk throughout this day, my eyes and heart fixed 
 upon Jesus — Jesus risen ! He that was dead, is now alive, 
 and reigns upon the throne above ; all power on earth and in 
 heaven is His. With Him I shall dwell throughout eternity — 
 blessed thought ! Precious Jesus ! heaven would be no heaven, 
 wert Thou not there. Not all I love on earth, were I to meet 
 them, could compensate for the loss of Thyself. Lord, help 
 me this day to pass through its cares without contamination, 
 upheld by the Spirit. I am all weakness ; with Thee is all 
 power. Help Thy weak one, and leave me not to myself. 
 Take my whole heart and soul in Thy hands, and order all my 
 goings, for Thine honour's sake." 
 
DIARY. 323 
 
 " Tuesday. — The text this morning was from Song of Solo- 
 mon ii. 10 : My beloved spake^ and said unto me, Rise up, my 
 love, my fair one, and come away. . . . The Lord is 
 pleased to enable me to hear without excitement. Surely He 
 has heard my prayer, and answered it. And not only so, but 
 in blessing the word to my soul. Every word seems to tell ; 
 and to all my heart can echo its sincere Amen. Oh, what 
 cause for thankfulness is this ! His dear name shall have all 
 the glory." 
 
 "Wednesday Evening. — The text this evening -was from 
 Phil. iv. 19: My God shall supply all your need according to 
 His riches in glory hy Christ Jesus. ... A word to the 
 rich and the poor of the flock. We have a spiritual and a 
 temporal need ; both supplied in and by Christ Jesus, in whom 
 God has treasured up a fulness adequate to all the wants of 
 His bride. His beloved, His fair one, whom He invites to rise 
 up and come away. Glory is prepared for her — a mansion 
 suitable to her dignity and station as the bride of the Lamb 
 and the Heir of God. Who can tell what this will be ? We 
 grovel so much here, we can hardly raise our poor ideas to that 
 inheritance that awaits us. Oh, for an eagle's wings to mount 
 higher toward heaven ! How trifling would then everything 
 appear here, but that which was connected with things above ! 
 Lord, help Thy creature to live more on high — more in com- 
 munion with Jesus — more looking to a risen Christ. 
 
 " 10th. — I have met with the following excellent observa- 
 tions from the pen of the Rev. Dr. Stone, Rector of Christ's 
 Church, Brooklyn, which are in close accordance with my own 
 views : ' The object of God, in the revelation of His will, and 
 in the incarnation of His Son, is to save men from sin, and to 
 bring them to eternal life. Every one in whom the required 
 faith is found has a direct and personal union with Christ ; so 
 that He draws his spiritual life, not by succession from another 
 believer, but immediately from the Saviour Himself. Nothing, 
 however thin, intervenes between the two. By faith the be- 
 liever is in Christ, and by the same faith Christ dwells in the 
 believer's heart,* This mystic union between Christ and each 
 individual Christian is as close and as perfect as though Christ 
 and each individual were the only ones in all the world con- 
 cerned in that union. As a foundation, Christ is as broad as 
 
 * "Would it not be more correct to say, that Christ dwells in tiio 
 believer's heart by the in-hein-g of the Holy Ghost .?— EpixqR. 
 
324 MEMOIR OF MIJS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 the realm of sin, and as long as the age of grace ; so that every 
 true believer touches, immediately and for himself, that on 
 which he builds. Each single character holds this living con- 
 nexion and communion with the Saviour as immediately and 
 as closely, and draws life therefrom as largely and as perfectly, 
 as though himself and the Saviour were the only beings con- 
 cerned in the Divine affinity. There are, then, in the world, 
 and there have been from the beginning, and will be to the 
 end, a steadily growing, and at length a very great company 
 of human beings, maintaining the character which I have just 
 explained — the character of true believers in Christ, and the 
 relations of a holy, individual union with Christ. These, as 
 represented in the Bible, and as found in fact, are an exceed- 
 ingly "peculiar people." There are none like them in all the 
 world. If what has been wrought in them could be laid open 
 to the eye of sense, they would instantly be known from other 
 men all over the earth.' Thus writes Dr. Stone. Oh, how 
 precious is this union ! How closely it draws the heart to 
 Jesus ; and how the heart entwines around its better part, and 
 exults in the thought, that nothing, not death itself, shall sep- 
 arate it from its dearest and best Friend, This is my highest 
 
 Following this extract from an American divine we find 
 transcribed in her journal an appropriate poetic piece of touch- 
 ing beauty. The lines are suggested by the words of Jesus, 
 "The foxes have holes, and the birds of the air have nests, 
 but the Son of man hath not where to lay His head." 
 
 " Birds have their quiet nest, 
 Foxes tlieir holes, and man his peaceful bed ; 
 
 All creatures have their rest, — 
 But Jesus had not where to lay His head. 
 
 '• Winds have their hour of calm, 
 And waves, to slumber on the voiceless deep ; 
 
 Eve hath its breath of balm. 
 To hush all senses and all sounds to sleep. 
 
 "The wild deer hath his lair. 
 The homeward flocks the shelter of their shed; 
 
 All have their rest from care, — 
 But Jesus had not where to lay His head. 
 
 " And yet He came to give 
 The weary and the heavy-laden rest, 
 
 To bid the sinner live, 
 And soothe our griefs to slumber on His breast. 
 
DIARY. 325 
 
 " "What, then, am I, my God, 
 Permitted thus the path of peace to tread ? 
 
 Peace, purchased by the blood 
 Of Him who had not Avhere to lay His head? 
 
 " T, who once made Him grieve ; 
 I, who once bid His gentle spirit mourn ; 
 
 Whose hand essay'd to weave 
 For His meek brow the cruel crown of thorn— 
 
 " Oh, why should I have peace ? 
 Why ? but for that unchanged, undying love, 
 
 Which would not, could not cease 
 Until it made me heir of joys above ? 
 
 " Yes ! but for pardoning grace 
 I feel I never should in glory see 
 
 The brightness of that face 
 That once was pale and agonized for me ! 
 
 " Let the birds seek their nest. 
 Foxes their holes, and man his peaceful bed ; 
 
 Come, Saviour, in my breast 
 Deign to repose Thine oft-rejected head! 
 
 " Come I give me rest, and take 
 The only rest on earth tliou lovest — within 
 
 A heart, that for Thy sake 
 Lies bleeding, broken, penitent for sin." 
 
 " Still going on my way, leaning on my Beloved, Jesus 
 is very precious. No tongue can tell how precious. Language 
 often fails, when on my knees, to tell Him how much I love 
 Him. My soul is kept near Him. I often have Him full in 
 view. If a cloud intervenes, I cannot rest until it be with- 
 drawn. Oh, for more of the wrestling power of prayer ! How 
 sensibly is He then present, lifting up the light of His counte 
 nance, and bending low His ear. When thus He shines, 1 
 then see what sin really is, and I weep. The sin pardoned, 
 the sinner beloved — this it is that breaks the heart, if anything 
 can. What an honour put upon a poor vile sinner, to be per- 
 mitted to love Jesus — to be invited to come to Him just as we 
 are. No wonder there is joy in heaven, and there ought to 
 be more joy on earth. Him truly we now only see through a 
 glass darkly. And yet there are times when the vail seems a 
 little withdrawn. I believe this is often the case at a dying 
 hour, just at the instant when the soul departs, and leaves its 
 clay behind. Lord Jesus, be a present help to me then. Let 
 no misgivings come over my mind. Keep Satan far from me. 
 
326 JIEMOIR OF MRS. MARY Vv'lNSLOW. 
 
 Remember Thy weak, Thy aged one. Speak to my struggling 
 soul. Speak holy words of comfort. Be near, and let me hear 
 Thy well-known voice. Let not the conflict be long. Give 
 me a speedy dismissal, and an abundant entrance into Thy 
 kingdom above. Oh, to be for ever with Thee ; that will be 
 heaven enough for me ! To gaze upon Thy ineffable face for 
 ever — to love Thee as I long to do — oh, it is worth dying for ! " 
 
 " The Lord has most preciously drawn sensibly near to my 
 soul. This morning, lield sweet communion with Him. My 
 mouth was opened Avide, to make great demands on His love. 
 I felt I had not only His ear, but His blessed countenance 
 shone upon me. How did I feel that to be with Jesus would 
 be heaven ! I longed to be with Him — wanted to get nearer, 
 and still nearer. I wept in an agony of love. How little did the 
 world, and all that was in it, appear to me ! Seemed as if I 
 could with ease have left the body, and mount up on high. 
 Felt overwhelmed with shame that I could ever have har- 
 boured one unkind thought of such a Being. He is all love, 
 nothing but love. Not one cold, upbraiding look has He ever 
 given me. Go as I will, and when I will, His ever-benignant 
 face smiles a welcome. Blessed Saviour, may I never, no 
 never, mistrust Thee, nor grieve Thy Spirit. Keep, oh, keep 
 me near Thee. Keep thine own blood-bought child from de- 
 parting from Thee now. Let me not lose sight of Thee, no, 
 not for one moment. Be Thou in all my thoughts day and 
 night, and let my thought, wish and desire centre in Thyself." 
 
 " What communion can a formalist have with God ? Com- 
 munion is supposed to be an interchange of sentiment, feeling, 
 and expression. AVhat communion could one have with a 
 statue ? You may speak to it, question it ; but there is no 
 response, no intimation of feeling, no communion. So is it 
 with the mere religious formalist. He regularly says his 
 prayers, but it is to an unhioivn God. He repeats the same 
 again and again, but he knows not the Being he addresses. 
 There is no response, no interchange of feeling, above all, of 
 love. Tliere is no answer from the Lord, no bending down of 
 His ear, no lifting up of His countenance, no cheering wel- 
 come ; and the formalist is satisfied. He does what he thinks 
 is his duty. He repeats his lifeless, heartless prayers, and 
 tliinks he has done well ; and so he lives and dies with a lie in 
 his right hand, unless God, in his sovereign mercy, awakens 
 him from his awful delusion, and shows him his lost and undone 
 
DIARY. 327 
 
 condition. But oh, how great are the behever's privileges ! He 
 draws near to a reconciled God and Father. Unless he has 
 communion, he cannot be happy. He pleads in the name of 
 Jesus, opens all his heart to One who loves him, and whom 
 he loves. He finds a response in the heart of God. He knows 
 God hears him, and will withhold no good thing from him. 
 He makes all his requests know^n with thanksgiving. He 
 often goes heavy laden, and returns with a lightsome heart, 
 overflowing with love. God has whispered peace to his troub- 
 led soul, and the Spirit within has borne the witness that 
 God loves him. This is communion. Oh, what a mercy to 
 know it ! " 
 
 " Text, Men luondered at. May the Lord bless it, and give 
 him who preached it strength of soul and strength of body to 
 go onward and live upward ; to gather all his supplies of grace 
 and providence from Him who is God all-sufficient, ready to 
 bestow all needful good for body, soul, and spirit. Text on 
 Sabbath morning, Psalm xviii. 35 : Thy gentleness hath made 
 me great. In the evening, Luke xv. 2 : This man receiveth 
 sinners^ and eateth luith them.'^ 
 
 "This is the Lord's day. Confined to the house. Dear 
 
 is now standing up in the name of the Lord, proclaiming 
 
 the glorious gospel of a precious Saviour. I have been to 
 prayer for a blessing upon it. Oh, that the Lord would pour 
 out a mighty blessing on the church ! Oh, that He would be 
 pleased to bow the heavens, and come down in the power of 
 the Holy Ghost, and encourage the heart of His tried servant ! 
 Lord, do be pleased to bless him throughout the day, and 
 made him the honoured instrument of great good. Oh, that 
 to-day sinners may be converted, and saints re-converted ; for 
 how many such are but half-awake, alas ! ' resting on theii 
 lees.'" 
 
 " The Lord has a controversy with this sinful land, this un- 
 godly nation. The famine and the pestilence is sweeping away 
 its hundreds and its thousands in Ireland and in Scotland. 
 The land may indeed be clothed with sackclotli. But do the 
 ungodly take knowledge of this ? Are the churches of Christ 
 humbling themselves? Is not the famine in Ireland sent as a 
 messenger of woe to proud and haughty England ? Are we 
 not partakers of the sins of Ireland? Are we less criminal 
 than they ? No ; not one whit less. Equally guilty are we 
 of trampling upon every precious precept, and of substituting 
 
328 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 our own views of truth, formed to please and honour the Hesh, 
 instead of the pure and precious gospel ! Oh, when will mei> 
 he wise, and consider their latter endf When will thej obey 
 God ? The world, the world is in their hearts, and the god of 
 this world reigns supreme, and there is no room for Jesus. 
 Precious Saviour ! still I pant for a closer walk with Thee. 
 The more man sets Thee at nought, the dearer art Thou to my 
 soul. I could weep to think how little Thou art thought of 
 by the world at large, and how little even by the professing 
 church. What a corrupted Christianity spreads, what cold, 
 heartless formality prevails ! How many are saying, ' Lord, 
 Lord ! ' who know Thee not ! How many are standing up 
 this very day in the name of the Lord, to preach a gospel — 
 which yet is no gospel — of their own invention ! " 
 
 " Spent the evening at . Had much to mourn over 
 
 afterwards. Lord, help me ! keep me humble, meek, and 
 lowly in heart ! I am powerless ! all power is Thine. With 
 Thy strengthening arm I can do all things. Be with dear 
 
 in his study to-day. Prepare him to preach a full gospel 
 
 this evening, and accompany it with the power of the Holy 
 Ghost to every one that heareth. Fill the place with true 
 worshippers. Oh, that sinners may be converted, and saints 
 sanctified ! Glorify Thyself in the midst." 
 
 " / cried unto the Lord ivith my voice ; with my voice unto the 
 Lord, did I make my supplication. I poured out my complaint 
 hefore Him ; L showed before Him my trouble. How often has 
 this been my case ! I, too, have cried unto the Lord in my 
 trouble, and He has heard me. He has bent low His ear, and 
 listened to my cry, and, oh, how graciously has He answered 
 my request, and done more and better for me than I asked ! 
 The Lord always exceeds our requests, and is better than our 
 fears." 
 
 "The Lord laid His hand upon me a few nights ago, and 
 brought me very low. My children did all that could be done 
 to alleviate my sufiTering; but I lifted up my heart to God 
 while fainting and sinking, and He heard me, and I am now 
 slowly recovering. When my spirit was overwhelmed within 
 m,e, then Thou hiewest my path.''' 
 
 " My God, whose gracious pity I may claim, 
 Calling thee ' Father,' sweet endearing name, 
 The sufferings of this weak and weary frame 
 All, all are known to Thee. 
 
DIARY. 329 
 
 "From human eyes 'tis better to conceal 
 Much that I sutfer, much I lionrly feel ; 
 But oh ! this tliought does tranquillize and heal, — 
 All, all is known to Thee. 
 
 " When in the morning unrefreslvd I wake 
 Or in the night but little rest I take. 
 This brief appeal submissively I make, — • 
 All, all is known to Thee. 
 
 *' And this continued feebleness, this state 
 Which seems to unnerve and incapacitate. 
 Will work the cure my hopes and fears await ; 
 That cure I leave to Thee. 
 
 "Nor will the bitter draught distasteful prove. 
 While I recall the Son of Thy dear love ; 
 The cup Thou wouldst not, for our sakes, remove, 
 That cup He drank for me. 
 
 *' He drank it to the dregs, no drop remained 
 Of wrath, whose cup of woe he drain'd, 
 Man ne'er can know what that sad cup contain'd, — 
 All, all is known to Thee. 
 
 " And welcome, precious can His Spirit make 
 jMy little drop of suffering for His sake. 
 Father, the cup I drink, the path I take, 
 All, all is known to Thee." 
 
 " Dr. Chalmers was found dead in his bed a few days ago. 
 How ready Ave all should be for the summons ! Blessed Jesus, 
 keep Thine handmaid in perfect preparedness, looking and 
 longing for Thy coming. 'What,' says Bishop Hall, 'is death, 
 but the taking doAvn of these sticks whereof this earthly tent 
 is composed. The separation of two great and old friends till 
 they meet again. The great gaol-deliverer of a long prisoner. 
 Our journey into the other Avorld, for what we, and this 
 thoroughfare, were made. Our payment of our first debt to 
 nature. The sleep of the body, the awakening of the soul.' 
 Lord, come Thou Avith the last enemy, and let me see Thy 
 smiling face all through the dark valley. 
 
 " HoAv often, Avhen a difficulty or trial has arisen, either 
 from feelings within or from circumstances without, helpless as 
 an infant, I have shut to my door, and come to tlie Lord, and 
 laid it before Him, pleading the promise — Cast the hiirden on 
 the Lord^ and He shall sustain thee. In a short time I have 
 risen from my knees, not only Avith my pressure entirely gone, 
 
330 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 but with such a sense of His faithfulness and abounding love 
 towards me, as has caused me to rejoice even to tears. At 
 other times, when a similar necessity has arisen, and I have 
 sat down to consider what I ought to do in the matter — 
 thus trusting my own heart, and leaning to my own under- 
 standing — and afterwards have carried it to the Lord, I have 
 been left still to bear my burden, attended with much discom- 
 fort the while, the Lord having left me to my own way. All 
 events are in His hands to direct, and overrule, and bless to 
 His own redeemed people. I say not that we are to fold our 
 arms and do nothing ; but I do say, that after carrying our 
 care in simple faith and obedience to His commands, w^e are to 
 wait and watch the leadings of His infinitely wise providence, 
 which is always at work for us." 
 
 " Yesterday was much tried. The Lord seemed to with- 
 draw His blessed countenance. I had not, as usual, a sense 
 of His presence. My heart failed me, I missed Him, and was 
 troubled. But it was not long. I cried unto Him with my 
 voice, and He heard me. The cloud, the dark cloud that veiled 
 His face, was removed, and He again appeared. I wept for 
 joy. Oh, how inexpressibly kind and indulgent He is to all 
 to whom He is the centre of all happiness, joy, and comfort I 
 How sweet the fresh recognition, the inward whisper, 'I am 
 thine, and thou art mine. Why didst thou doubt?' Lord, 
 I did not doubt Thy faithfulness, but feared I had displeased 
 Thee, and that Thou hadst put Thy child away from Thy 
 presence. Now I know that Thou art pacified towards me, 
 and my heart is glad in Thee. Hide not Thy face from Thy 
 aged one, and put not Thy servant from Thoe ; for Thou art 
 my chief joy, my life, my all. Without Thee this world were 
 wretchedness itself I would not live always here, though 
 blessed witli Thy presence. I want to see Thee as Thou art, 
 in all Tliy glory, surrounded by the pure spirits redeemed from 
 the curse, and to join my song of praise with theirs. Keep, 
 oh keep me near Thyself, nearer, nearer still ; and suffer no 
 earthly love to occupy Thy place in my heart." 
 
 'Jesus, first-born Priest and Brother, 
 
 Changing not as others change ; 
 Wherefore should we seek another ? 
 Whither should our spirits range ? 
 
 " While tliy gracious arms enfold us, 
 Should we seek another rest ? 
 
TO MISS R , OX HER liETUUN FROM AMERICA. 331 
 
 Could another stay uphold us, 
 
 Like our Saviour's faithful breast? 
 
 " Earthly love, how fitful, gleaming, 
 O'er life's tossing, troubled tide; 
 Thine the lamp for ever beaming, 
 With the golden oil supplied. 
 
 " Jesus, come, our strength renewing 
 Blessed, living Fountain Head ; 
 Bid our souls to cease from hewing 
 Broken cisterns in Thy stead." 
 
 The few incidents of her subsequent sojourn upon earth, and 
 much of the spiritual exercises of her mind, will be gleaned 
 from extracts from her correspondence. 
 
 to miss r , on her return from america. 
 
 " My dear Miss R , 
 
 " I have heard a report that you have arrived safely 
 in England once more. But I should much like to receive the 
 intelhgence from yourself, and to hear all about our friends on 
 the other side of the water, — some dear to me as well as your- 
 self in that happy land. I love America, and always shall be 
 interested in the welfare of that country. For though my 
 deepest trials were there, so there also I experienced some of 
 my richest consolations, and much Christian love and fellow- 
 ship. It is good to feel that we are in the Lord's hands, and 
 that all our trials, small and great, are designed by Him for 
 the furthering His work in our souls. They are great bless- 
 ings in disguise to a child of God. Nothing takes place, 
 within or without, but is designed for our especial benefit and 
 the glory of His own dear name. We shall have to thank 
 Him for all, when we see Him face to face. What a blessed 
 time will that be ! Oh, that we did but live more in holy an- 
 ticipation of that event, to which all things else are subservient ! 
 How much do we need of weaning from this poor disappoint- 
 ing world, — a world lying in the wicked one ; and yet so 
 closely do we cling to it, He who loves us is compelled to give 
 us many a wrench to tear us from it. Oh, to be on the wing 
 for our blessed inheritance above, looking to those things that 
 are eternal ! Love not the worlds neither the things that are in the 
 world. With what hearts of unbelief do we read the Bible ; 
 and how prone are we to forget its commands, precepts, and 
 promises; and so we call down a Father's gentle rod, to 
 
332 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 awaken us to a sense of our folly and our sin. But, oh, it is 
 all in love to our souls that He thus acts towards us. He is 
 now trying my faith in this dispensation. I have been some 
 weeks confined to the house, and with but little prospect of 
 being able to walk again soon, if ever. I needed it, I doubt 
 not. Now write me a long letter ; it will cheer me in my sick 
 room. My love to your nieces." 
 
 The bodily infirmity alluded to in the preceding letter threat 
 ened at one time the most serious consequences. It sprung 
 from a weakness, which increased to such a degree, as not only 
 to occasion at times intense suffering, but also entirely to pre- 
 vent the use of the limb. For some months she was dependent 
 upon others, and could only move from place to place in a 
 wheel chair. After having the best surgical advice in town, 
 she was carried to Leamington, relinquishing all hope of ever 
 again being able to walk. The temper of her mind under this 
 severe trial, and the details of its removal, we gather from one 
 of her familiar letters to a friend. 
 
 " Leamington, March 24th. 
 " .... I have thought much of you lately in your 
 painful position. There was an expression m my last to you 
 that has worried me, because I feared it might wound you. I 
 remarked, among other things, that the Christian should sup- 
 press that murmuring spirit that adheres so closely to us. 
 Now, beloved, I feel in your case it is quite a different thing ; 
 and that in expressing your daily sufferings, there may be no 
 murmuring against a good and gracious God who loves you, 
 and is trying your faith to the utmost. May the Lord enable 
 us more and more to look alone to Him, for he is a present 
 help in every time of need. His heart overflows with tender- 
 ness, sympathy and love. But there are real believers who 
 do, too often, repine at the providence of God. If all things 
 do not go as they Avish, they fret and are dissatisfied. This 
 state of mind I believe is injurious to them and dishonouring 
 to God. Oh, for a stronger confidence in Jesus ! Whatever 
 draws or drives us to Him is good. The oftener we go the 
 better ; and the Lord frequently places us in such peculiar cir- 
 cumstances, as compel us to apply to Him for the help we can 
 get nowhere else. You will remember my trouble in the loss 
 of the use of my limb. I was obliged to be carried about like 
 an infant. Then often I went to the Lord, and earnestly be- 
 sought Him to restore to me its use. I fiUed my mouth with 
 
HER LAMENESS. 833 
 
 arguments, and told Him He had but to speak the word, and 
 I should be whole. I felt he could as easily heal me as He 
 did the lame man that lay at the pool of Bethesda. I re- 
 minded Him again and again of this, and my faith was strong 
 in His power to do now as He did then. But still my lame- 
 ness continued, and I was totally helpless. And now Satan 
 took advantage of this to upbraid me, — ' Where is the answer 
 to your prayers ? You asked not to be left to be a burden to 
 yourself or to others, — where is now the answer of which you 
 so often boast ? ' But still I clung to the Lord, and believed, 
 bad as my case was. He would heal me. One day these words 
 came powerfully to my mind — 'Ask for submission.' I im 
 mediately obeyed the heavenly admonition, and turned my 
 prayer into an earnest petition for this grace. At that very 
 moment it was given. I felt in an instant quieted down, and 
 all my restlessness of spirit and anxiety to be healed was gone, 
 and I was cheerful and composed. I was satisfied to be borne 
 about hke an infant, if it were the Lord's will. A fortnight 
 after this my medical man called, and seeing me in the draw- 
 ing-room in my wheel chair, inquired the cause. I told him. 
 He asked to examine the limb, which presented a highly in 
 flamed appearance. He said nothing then, but called the fol- 
 lowing day. Finding me down, he took my arm, and insisted, 
 against my remonstrance, that I should walk round the room. 
 This I did three times ; and from that hour the healing process 
 commenced, and I was perfectly restored. "Was not this of 
 the Lord ? He first gave me submission to His will, and then 
 answered my prayer by restoring my limb, and I was no 
 longer a burden. Thus does He try the faith He gives. Oh, 
 for faith in the power of God ! Why have I detailed this long 
 story ? Simply to encourage your confidence in the Lord, who 
 has said, Is anything too hard for Me f . . . 1 am, through 
 mercy, well, and go on my way rejoicing in the Lord. Live 
 much in heaven, and earth will grow less attractive. Realize 
 what awaits you, and go fully into the good land. There are 
 many borderers; they go not up to possess and enjoy their in- 
 heritance. They follow not on to know the Lord. They do 
 not know what close fellowship with Christ is. They do not 
 come with the expectation of being absolutely heard and an- 
 swered. They are satisfied to go away without a response. 
 If we have the Spirit of Christ within. He indites our prayers ; 
 for aye know not ivhat we should 2^'>'ay for as we ought ; hut the 
 
331 MEMOIR OP MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 Spirit itself maketh intercession for us according to the will of 
 God ; and that self-same Spirit will respond to our petitions. 
 . . The present times are momentous. The Lord himself is 
 showing us that He is about to deal with His one church, for 
 He has but one, composed of all that are born of the Spirit, 
 and are thus new creatures in Christ Jesus. This is His bride, 
 His spouse. This one church He is about to sift. It needs it, 
 for there is much chaff with the wheat. Let our eye and our 
 hearts be up unto Him, and see what He designs in all the 
 great movements around us. I sit quiet as a babe, and can 
 saj, ' It is my Father, let Him do as it seemeth Him good.' 
 He will do us all possible good, and no harm. I hope I have 
 not wearied you. May the Lord heal, comfort, and bless 
 you." 
 
 Another domestic sorrow was darkling over her path. The 
 alarming illness, and its fatal termination, of a much-loved 
 daughter-in-law, the wife of her son, the Rev. Isaac Deblois 
 "Winslow, Vicar of Napton,* bowed her aged frame with 
 sorrow to the earth. Endeared, through many long years of 
 tried affection, by a character of peculiar excellence, by an 
 amiability of disposition as rare as it was charming, and by 
 sincere and simple piety, her loss was a sore bereavement to 
 her family. Mrs. Winslow's diary and letters describe her 
 thoughts and feelings in this keenly-felt affliction. We quote 
 from her journal : — 
 
 " Feb. 1 1th. — Dear F has been seriously ill, and at times 
 
 not expected to recover. G is with her, and so is E . 
 
 I am feeble and depressed. My threescore years and ten have 
 expired, and I feel everything a burden and a sorrow. But 
 the Lord is very gracious, and at times my heart is overwhelm- 
 ed with a sense of His unmerited love towards one so utterly 
 unworthy. I long to be with Him. The thought of heaven 
 is very sweet. And when I can realize it, my soul feels as if 
 upon the wing. I long to see Him in glory, who has so 
 frequently and tenderly dealt with me. Even to old age has 
 He carried me, and I believe will never leave nor forsake me, 
 but land me safely in glory." 
 
 " 14th. — Still the accounts of dear F are far from being 
 
 encouraging. I fear for her life. I pray the Lord will be 
 graciously pleased to spare the mother to her children, and 
 
 *Now Vicar of Bucklington, "Warwick. 
 
DEATH OF HER DAUGHTER-IN-LAW. 335 
 
 sanctify the affliction to lierself and to all her family. How- 
 needful to be ready ! What a constant source of temptation 
 the world is, in some shape or other, to the believer all through 
 his journey homeward! Its cares and its pursuits, its pleasures 
 and its claims, lawful though they be,, yet, through the w^eak- 
 ness of the flesh, are constantly a snare to the heavenly pilgrim. 
 Its principles and its pursuits are adverse to the prosperity of the 
 soul, which struggles on through a host of foes from within and 
 from without, and often exclaiming, 'How shall I ever maintain 
 my standing to the end ? Lord, hold Thou me up, and I shall 
 be safe. Thou, who hast delivered my soul from death, wilt 
 Thou not deliver my feet from falling, that I may walk before 
 Thee in the land of the living ? ' A patient waiting upon God, 
 and a constant application to the Fountain, is the safest w^ay 
 to glory. Precious Jesus, strengthen thy poor dust, and enable 
 me to cling closer and closer to Thee. Increase my faith, and 
 sanctify me for Thyself Be with the dear sufferer to-night, 
 
 and give some refreshing sleep, and keep dear E from 
 
 over-fatigue. Lord bless, heal, sanctify, and restore! 
 
 " 15th. — Dear F has fallen asleep in Jesus." 
 
 To her pastor she thus unfolds her sorrow: — 
 "... The Lord has again laid upon me His afflictive hand. 
 My heart has been sorely tried, and n^y soul cast down. God 
 has taken another from me, very dear, and I cannot describe 
 how greatly it has oppressed me. I am sad, very sad, and 
 have not been able to rise above it, as on former occasions. 
 Pray for me. The Lord is good, I know ; in the midst of it 
 all, there is a reason for all that He does, and He will make 
 it plain in His own time. The sufferings of the dear departed 
 one still press me down; but at time=: I get a glimpse of her 
 pure spirit above, and I weep for joy, but much oftener for 
 sorrow. See how much I need year sympathy just now. 
 
 Dear E has been deeply tried. She w^atched by this dear 
 
 departed one, untiringly and devotedly, day and night, for 
 weeks, scarcely in all that time having one night's rest; and at 
 last her sister, as she wished, expired in her arms. Beloved 
 brother, do not forget us. My soul is cast down, but in the 
 midst of all I can say, 'Thy will, O my Father, and not mine, 
 be done.' Pray for us and the motherless ones." 
 
 " Dear Miss D . 
 
 "... This has been a severe trial to us all. Dear 
 Fanny was tenderly beloved by my whole family, who have 
 
336 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 known her from almost a girl. Her sufferings were severe, 
 and from the first she resigned all expectation of recovery, and 
 said, ' I shall die.' Her mind, in the early part of her illness, 
 was much exercised and greatly tried in view of eternity ; and 
 she lamented she had not cultivated a closer walk with God. 
 
 Dear E reminded her that Jesus was ready to receive her 
 
 now, even now^ just as she was. She replied, 'Yes, I must 
 come, as a poor wretched sinner, now.' The Lord, however, 
 appeared, and her mind became stayed upon Christ. A day 
 or two before she died, she sang the whole night such hymns 
 as these — 
 
 ' Rock of ages, cleft for rae.' 
 
 'Jesus, lover of my soul.' 
 
 And on one occasion said, * Oh, that I might recover to tell 
 you what the Lord has done for my soul on this sick bed.' 
 . . . Dear friend, how these things should remind us of the 
 uncertainty of life, and the necessity of living prepared to meet 
 the Lord in the clouds of heaven, at His second coming, or 
 when he sees fit to summon us to Himself! To be with Jesus, 
 let that be as it may, is heaven. How precious is the thought, 
 to be for ever with the Lord ! — to see Him in all His glory, to 
 mingle with the pure spirits around the throne, and be a 
 pure spirit too. Oh, I think the very purity of heaven is its 
 sweetest attraction ! Dear friend, ere long I hope to meet you 
 there. Blessed hope, beaming with immortahty, which I some- 
 times long to realize. Let it be our chief aim to glorify Him — 
 to live upon Him, and live for Him. Oh, he is most precious, 
 so tender, so full of love, so watchful over our interests, caring 
 for us in all things, and entering into all our poor concerns! 
 He is one with us in our tribulations, one with us in suffering, 
 one in time and in eternity; for there is no separating Christ 
 and His saints." 
 
 The following interesting extracts are from her diary while 
 at Napton Vicarage, the scene of her recent bereavement. 
 The brief record of her visit to the grave of the dear departed 
 one, evinces the triumph of real faith in the living, as in the 
 dying Christian, over its gloom and sadness. "0 grave, where 
 is thy victory?" might well now have been her challenge. 
 Let us, who repair to the graves of the holy dead who sleep 
 in Jesus, to weep there, cherish the feeling and indulge the 
 hope she thus so touchingly describes. 
 
 "Napton. — I had often wished, during my visit at Napton, 
 
VISIT TO THE GRAVE. 337 
 
 to see the spot where the dear body laj, but for fear of exciting 
 my feehngs and producing illness, I refrained. After the lapse 
 of some weeks, still cherishing a strong desire to go there, 
 
 accompanied by H , I ascended the hill to the church. I 
 
 drew near and looked at it, and as I stood bending over it, 
 these w-ords sounded in my ears, as distinctly as if audibly 
 spoken, 'She is not here.'' 'Oh yes,' I replied aloud, 'she is not 
 Aere, she is there,' looking up.- It was the well-known voice 
 of my Beloved. Oh, to know His voice ! May I hear it 
 again and again, speaking words of comfort when I am called 
 to pass through the dark valley. The Lord is ever near; He 
 is about our path. "We have not far to go to seek Him, I 
 think I know something of the still, small voice of the Spirit 
 within, and desire so to walk as to be better acquainted with 
 God, and to feel that He is always with me, and that I am 
 not alone." 
 
 " Called to see a young woman in the village, dying of a 
 consumption. She does not know Christ. Read and prayed 
 with her. She begged me to come again. Spoke to the 
 woman who has the care of her; found her quite ignorant. 
 This sick woman has three young children, one a suffering 
 cripple, and another not expected to live, and her husband 
 scarcely able, by hard labor, to maintain them all. What a 
 suffering world is this, and how little anxious poor sinners are 
 to secure a better! Went into another room, and talked to an 
 old woman, poor but respectable, seventy-five years old. She 
 does not know Jesus. Spoke faithfully to her, at which she 
 seemed to feel and expressed herself thankful. Called at an 
 adjoining cottage, and had a long conversation with another 
 aged woman, who acknowledged she was not converted. Ex- 
 horted her to lose no time in applying to One, who alone could 
 save her soul. While speaking loud to her, as she was deaf, 
 I found a young woman in the next room, with a family of 
 children about her, heard me. She v/as rejoiced to see me, 
 expressed herself as happy in the Lord, and while speaking of 
 Christ her heart seemed to overflow with love. She had known 
 Jesus for some years. Returned to the Vicarage, comforted that 
 I had seen one who knew Him whom my soul loveth." 
 
 "How difficult it is, at least for me, to sustain anything like 
 spiritual conversation Avhen many are present, even though they 
 are religious professors! The interest languishes. I find it 
 more profitable to spr^ak to one or tv.^o alone; and but seldom 
 
338 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 feel refreshed when the conversation descends to generals. 
 Oh, to keep close to Christ, to talk of Christ, to encourage one 
 another to believe, to get more of heaven in our souls, more 
 of the power of Jesus within, to believe with all the heart — 
 that is what we want ! " 
 
 'Have been unwell, but am better, though still feeble. 
 
 H is with me, and is very careful and tender. After a 
 
 little walk upon the lawn, was tired, and glad to rest. What 
 a mercy to be able to look beyond this dying world, to the 
 prospect of meeting Him who has pardoned all my transgres- 
 sions, and of being with Him for ever! — to meet again those 
 we have loved here, mingling with their pure spirits, and 
 uniting in their eternal anthems of praise to Him who brought 
 us there. And shall I, the unworthiest of the unworthy, see 
 Him face to face, against whom I have so often sinned, whose 
 Spirit I liave so often grieved? Shall I be near Him, and be 
 permitted to love Him as my soul wishes now to do, but 
 cannot? Oh, glorious prospect! My heart is humbled w^hile 
 I rejoice in the wondrous goodness of a sin-pardoning God, 
 who could, and does, love such a one as I. How I long to be 
 holy even as He is holy! And will it not be so? When I 
 drop this vile body, shall I not awake in His righteousness? 
 When I see Him, shall I not be like Him? Everything in 
 
 this house reminds me of dear F . She is with Christ. 
 
 Her little faith would take her ^vithin the gate of heaven. She 
 mourned over her short-comings, wept that she had not walked 
 closer with God. But her end was peace, and that was enough. 
 returns from the Evangelical Alliance Conference to- 
 morrow. I hear, the Lord has been graciously pleased to be 
 with the dear brethren. Oh, for a greater outpouring of His 
 Spirit before the close ! Lord, set Thy seal of approval afresh 
 to this great movement of Thy one church, for thine own 
 name's sake." 
 
 For the works of the old divines she had imbibed an early 
 taste. Their sound theology, depth of thought, and elevated 
 spirituality, harmonized with the peculiar order of her own 
 mind. She was wont to remark, that there was more of Christ, 
 more of the marrow of the gospel, and more of Chri&tian 
 experience in a single page of such authors as Owen and 
 Charnock, Leighton, Bates, and Newton, than in entire volumes 
 of some modern theological writers. Interwoven with her 
 diary, we find the following extract from one of her favorite 
 
BRIDGE ON FAITH. B39 
 
 authors. Its perusal may be a word in season to some tried 
 reader of this volume, as it was to her when transcribed : — 
 
 "On the subject of faith, Bridge has these striking and 
 excellent remarks: — 'God doth so give blessings and mercies 
 unto His own people, as that He may be most of all seen in 
 them. Beloved, God doth not only give us these outward 
 creature comforts to supply our wants, but to bear up the 
 honor of His own greatness. When He gives to His people, 
 He gives in such a way as He may most of all unfold Himself. 
 If it were only to supply their w^auts, then, possibly, the sen- 
 tence of death would never come upon the second cause ; but 
 it is also to bear up His own name, and the honor of His own 
 greatness, and that is done this way. Hereby God is known 
 to be the living God. So long as there is life in the means, 
 God is not so well known to be the living God; but when all 
 means are dead, and yet the mercy comes, 'Oh,' says the soul, 
 'now I see that God is the living God.' Hereby the power 
 of God is made known. He must needs be great in power, 
 that can say to things that are not, 'Be,' and give a resurrec- 
 tion to dead things. So long as there is strength and ability 
 in the means, the soul doth not so much consider the power and 
 the all-sufficiency of God ; but when all means are strengthless, 
 and all means are dead, and yet the mercy comes, 'Oh,' says 
 the soul, 'now I see that God is Almighty, God all-sufficient.' 
 Secondly, God goes to work this way with His people, that 
 they may learn to trust more in Him, and in Him alone. The 
 apostle says, 'She that is a widow and desolate trusteth in 
 God.' We seldom trust in God till a desolation comes upon 
 the means ; then we learn to trust in God. So long as one 
 who is learning to swim, can touch earth with his feet, he does 
 not commit himself to the stream. So long as the soul can 
 stand upon second causes, he does not commit himself to the 
 stream of mercy. Again, God is pleased thus to order things 
 that the comforts of His people may be more sure and stead- 
 fast. If our comforts hang at the girdle of the creature, they 
 are most uncertain; but if they are all laid upon God, His 
 promise and His power, they are certain. Again: A mere 
 rational considering of the means — their straitness, narrowness, 
 and scantiness — is a great enemy to the act of believing. The 
 Scriptures have laid a flat opposition between faith and sense. 
 We hve by faith, and not by sense. The reasons drawn from 
 sense are sense. If you live by faith, you do not live by sense. 
 
340 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 They are two buckets — the hfe of sense and the hfe of faith, 
 when one goes up, the other goes down. The higher faith 
 rises, the lower sense and reason sink. If you would believe, 
 you must crucify that question, ' Why ? ' God would not have 
 us so fall of wherefores. And if you would believe, you must 
 go blindfold into God's command. Abraham subscribed to a 
 blank when the Lord called him out of his own country. It 
 is the privilege of all the children of Abraham to believe when 
 means fail. It is exceeding pleasing to God, and most accept- 
 able. Oh, what encouragement is here to believe above hope 
 and against hope, and when death sits upon the life of the second 
 cause ! Some there are that can believe for the bodies, but they 
 cannot trust God for their souls wdien means fail. Some say 
 they can trust God for their souls when means fail, but they 
 cannot trust Him for their bodies. Some say they can trust 
 God for themselves, but they cannot trust Him for their 
 famihes. my soul, trust thou upon God I"* 
 
 TO MRS. C . TRIALS, A HEAVENLY DISCIPLINE. 
 
 " Yery dear Friend, "Naptoa, August 22d. 
 
 "The Lord has brought me here, I trust, for some ser- 
 vice He has for me to do. If His servants, we ought to be 
 doing His work ; and it is so sweet to work when love turns 
 the wheel. It is the love of God in the heart that sets us all 
 in motion. I am persuaded it is irksome where this is not the 
 case. To work for God as a hireling is one thing, and to work 
 
 for Him as a son is another. Dear E is one of the most 
 
 efficient curates a parish minister need have. She is up and 
 doing the will of the Lord in everything to which he points. 
 
 I is from home, and she is doing his work, all but going 
 
 into the pulpit ; and this she gets properly supplied, and has 
 this morning gone ten miles to procure a clergyman who she 
 knows loves and preaches the gospel. ... I was glad to hear 
 
 dear Mr. C was better in health. We must not expect 
 
 much here ; all our richest blessings are to come, reserved for 
 us who are kept for them. This time-state is but a prepara- 
 tory state. We are disciplining and preparing for the glorious 
 inheritance above ; but how often, through wretched unbelief, 
 w^e seem to w^ish to have our all here. And although, from 
 bitter experience, we feel and acknowledge it is polluted, and 
 
 * Rev. William Bridge died 1670. 
 
EVANGELICAL ALLIANCE. 341 
 
 IS not our rest, yet more or less we go on, often repining, be- 
 cause we cannot have things just as we wish. Oh, to leave 
 ourselves in a loving, tender Father's hands ! He knows what 
 we need, and what we ought to have, and will deny us no good 
 thing. But He must judge for us, who are but as babes, who 
 cannot judge for ourselves. . . . You are in His hands, and 
 although He tries your faith, in due time, if you look alone to 
 Him, He will appear for you, and show you the why and the 
 wherefore He has tried you. Blessed is the man that trusteth 
 in the Lord : may this blessing rest upon you. It is so diffi- 
 cult to keep from looking to an arm of flesh, and yet say, we 
 must make use of the means. I do not plead for indolence, 
 nor would encourage inactivity ; but I would not work out a 
 way for myself, but leave it to Him, who sees the end from the 
 beginning, to work for me. It is a happy position for a behever 
 to be in, when he is brought to that point to see he can do no- 
 thing for himself, then to rest and wait patiently for the Lord, 
 fully believing He will do all things in the best possible way. 
 Whatever the Lord does in this way for us, is the best, the 
 very best, better than with all our wisdom and management 
 we could have done for ourselves. I am persuaded, the more 
 we live by faith, the holier and the happier Ave are. Is it not 
 written. Casting all your care upon Him, for He careth for you? 
 "What, then, need I care, when my Saviour is caring for me ? 
 Am I not one with Christ, and is He not one with me ? Then, 
 are not my concerns His concerns, and has He ever failed me? 
 Then, my soul, why not trust Him now ? May He increase 
 our faith ; this will more glorify Him than all our fleshly burnt- 
 oflerings and sacrifices. 
 
 "How do you both feel towards the 'Evangelical Alliance,' 
 now assembled in London ? I consider it one of the grandest 
 movements of the one church below since the apostles' time. 
 One of Christ's last commands was. Love ye one another, as 1 
 have loved you. Now we are always anxious to fulfil the dying 
 requests of one we love, and everything then said seems of the 
 greatest moment to us. This was one of our dying Lord's last 
 requests to His church. These dear men are carrying it out 
 on the broad foundation, simply of love to all who love Him, 
 and who hold Him the Head ; while all minor things are laid 
 aside, and they agree on the fundamental truths of the gospel. 
 I believe this movement is of God Himself, and that already 
 He has put upon it His seal of approbation. Satan will en- 
 
342 MEMOIR OF MRS. ilARY WTNSLOW. 
 
 deavor to hinder it ; but be assured tlie Lord will bless it, for 
 it is a holy attempt to obey His command, which has been too 
 much neglected. Many will sa}-, w^ho stand aloof from the 
 Alliance, 'But I do love all God's people.' We answer, 
 ' Show your love by uniting with these men of God as one in 
 Christ.' God is love. The atmosphere of heaven is love. 
 When w^e arrive there, we shall swim in an ocean of love ; 
 then why not have as much of heaven here as we can ? Why 
 not try to be as much like what we shall be, while journeying 
 towards that ocean of bliss and love ? I think, were I upon 
 my dying bed, and were called upon to address them, I should 
 say, ' Go on, my beloved brethren, to show your love to Jesus, 
 by exhibiting your love to every member of His own body ; 
 for you are all members of that Body, and members one of an- 
 other. Love ye one another^ as I have loved you.'' I believe 
 that popery is working its silent way, and that the last effort 
 of the ' beast ' will soon be manifest. No wonder that the Lord 
 is calling his people to unite together in a holy confederacy to 
 resist the common foe. It will require the united force of God's 
 church to withstand this arch enemy. I believe that this ' Al- 
 liance ' is preparatory to the great onset ; that the work is the 
 Lord's, and that He will bless it. I can and do pray for it, 
 nor can I express to you in language the measure the Saviour 
 permits me to enjoy of His sensible presence while pleading on 
 its behalf Oh, there is a truth in the religion of Jesus ! There 
 is an enjoyment in communion with the holy God, of which the 
 worldling knows nothing. It is foolishness with the wisest of 
 men ; but the sincere, lowly follower of Christ Jesus, loved of 
 God, regenerated by the Holy Ghost, is made to sit in heavenly 
 places in Christ Jesus. Oh, the infinite value of a throne of 
 
 grace 
 
 " Dear beloved Friend, '• Leamington, 27th, 1851. 
 
 "It is long since I heard it'om you. We are both near- 
 ing our port, where we are to cast anchor for ever. Sweet 
 thought! What a mercy for you and me tliat we have known 
 Jesus ; a still greater mercy that He has condescended to know 
 and acknowledge us as His! Let us rejoice together in the 
 goodness and loving-kindness of our God. My heart is often 
 overwhelmed at the thought of His avowing such a worthless 
 worm as myself as one of His sheep for whom He shed His 
 precious blood. Dear friend, let us never for a moment forgot 
 
LETTERS TO HER DAUGHTER. 343 
 
 what we were, and what we now are — candidates for a crown 
 of glory, heirs of God, and joint-heirs with Christ. Is not this 
 worth Uving for, and worth dying for? Let us now aim to 
 walk humbh' and confidingly with Him, and never suffer Him 
 to be out of our sight. Oh, to travel on, leaning upon our 
 Beloved! His arm will support us in our feebleness; His eye 
 will guide us in our blindness ; He will strengthen, uphold, and 
 comfort us, and never leave nor forsake us. I cannot express 
 to yon on paper, hardly in language, how graciously the Lord 
 does at times enable me to anticipate the heaven of glory that 
 awaits the believer in Jesus. There sits Jesus, He who was 
 once despised and rejected of men ; who suffered, the innocent 
 for the guilty ; w^ho paid the full demand to stern justice for 
 our sins ; He who had no place to lay His weary head, though 
 Maker of all things; there He now is, enthroned in the majesty 
 of heaven, and encircled by that goodly company who have 
 escaped from earth, and are now hymning His praises, and 
 standing nearer His thro7ie than the highest angel in heaven. 
 I sometimes so realize the blessedness of the believer, that I 
 could shout to the whole world that all is true, the Bible true, 
 Christ true, heaven true. May the Lord bless you w^th much 
 of His sensible presence ; and when we get above, we will 
 unite our praises to Him who loved us, and washed us in His 
 own most precious blood," 
 
 AYe continue extracts from her family correspondence, as 
 exhibiting a yet greater variety of topic : — 
 
 TO HER DAUGHTER, 
 
 " . . . . Oh, to look fully to Jesus, not with a half-heart, 
 but to carry all our every varying care to Him, and plead the 
 promise. Sure I am, if we walk in the precept, He will fulfil 
 to us the promise. May He continually give us grace to do 
 so ! Oh, the luxury of living upon Him ; to be constantly 
 depending upon our covenant Father in Christ Jesus ! But 
 faith has, and must have, hard travail to bring forth, and to 
 press through the crowd of difficulties and impossibilities that 
 lie in the way to the kingdom of glory. Thus faith fights all 
 the journey through, and upholds the poor, trembling believer; 
 and not only so, but brings him off victorious at last. The life 
 of fxith in the soul of man is wonderful, and is, I believe, a 
 wonder to the angels in heaven ; and I am sure we are often 
 a wonder to ourselves, — at least I am. Oh, what a God we 
 
344 MEMOIR OF MRS. M vRY WINSLOW. 
 
 have to do with ! so full of love and compassion ; and although 
 He tries us, it is all in love to bring us to know Him more, 
 that we might love Him better. Should w^e not give our un- 
 divided hearts to this gracious God and Father in Christ 
 Jesus? The last chapter of the Gospel of John is so full, 
 precious, and abounding in the love of the Triune-Jehovah, 
 from the 14th to the 18th verse. Read it with prayer, and 
 see how certain and secure is our salvation, what a firm foun- 
 dation it rests upon. What is the world, or the glory of a 
 thousand such perishing worlds as this, when compared with the 
 glory that shall be revealed in them that love His appearing?" 
 " What a mercy to have a good and gracious God to look 
 to, and ask what you will, and to know that He always hears 
 and stands ready to answer ! Think what an honour put upon 
 a poor worm, to have the ear and the heart of the mighty 
 God I to know that He loves you, and cannot cease to love, 
 because He cannot change. He knows what we -were, and 
 what we should be to the end ; and yet He loved us, and will 
 love throughout eternity. And what does He require ? Only 
 our heart — -just as it is, with all its imperfections. He asks the 
 gift, and that it may be His, and His only. He loves not a di 
 vided heart — He will not share it with the creature. . . . He can 
 never do aught but good to you, because you are His — His child. 
 His ow;7i child by adoption — His child by regeneration — His child 
 by an especial promise. I will he a Father to thy fatherless chil 
 dren^ says God to you. So you see what a claim you have upon 
 God. Remind Him of this. He loves to be reminded of His 
 promises, though He never forgets them ; but He loves to see 
 that we remember them too. Oh, what a holy endearing in- 
 tercourse there is between a child of God and his heavenly 
 Father ! No earthly parent could have loved you as He does. 
 There is something so precious in coming to Him, your Father 
 in Jesus. These tw^o names are better and sweeter than all 
 the names on earth and in heaven ; a name which is above 
 every name ; and these are yours made over to you by an ever- 
 lasting covenant of grace, which will finally end in glory to all 
 eternity. Be not over careful about earthly things ; get above 
 them as much as you can. Look to Jesus for help when they 
 press upon you, and He will not fail you, for He knows that 
 without Him you can do nothing. All power is His in heaven 
 and on earth. Go to Him for little things, in little straits and 
 difficulties, at home or abroad, in a crowd or w]\on alone ; raiso 
 
JOY IN THE RESURRECTION. 345 
 
 your heart to your Father who heareth alway, and will never 
 leave nor forsake His own child ; for He will be with you even 
 unto the end. Look at the scenes of a busy world, how they 
 pass away ; it is but as the buzzing of a summer fly, and all is 
 gone. Therefore, set your affections on things above, where 
 friends pass not away. Oh, for stronger faith, to give full 
 credit to what the Lord says, to act upon it, and carry it out 
 in every department of life ! " 
 
 "... How have I thought of you all this day, travelling 
 to a strange place, and the weather so cold ! You have not 
 been a moment, I think, out of my mind. I thought, and 
 prayed, and could have wept. I trust the Lord heard my 
 prayer and strengthened you, and shielded you from the sever- 
 ity of the weather, and caused you to see His own loving hand. 
 If you do not find Clifton to suit you, try Torquay, or Ventnor. 
 Oh, that the Lord may lend a gracious ear, and cause us to see 
 all was directed in a special way by Himself! . . . But I 
 must again advert to the great mercy of having such a Helper 
 as our loving Lord to do all for us, and far better than we 
 could think of or imagine for ourselves. I trust, when He 
 places us in such peculiar situations, it is to make us see 
 and feel there is a reahty and power in faith in God. Write 
 
 as soon as you can, if it is only a few hues. is in his 
 
 study ; H and P are reading Miss Grant's Memoir, 
 
 written by her mother. Good night. May you enjoy much 
 of the presence of the Lord, and feel you are not alone, but 
 that you have the best Friend that mortal can have to watch 
 over you, and to whom you can open your whole heart, and 
 talk to Him as a man talketh Avith his fellow." 
 
 To her son, in acknowledging a small work on the Resur- 
 rection, she thus touches upon her favorite theme : — 
 
 " Blessed is the pen, blessed the hand that holds and the 
 heart that indites, that gives one cheering view of the mighty 
 blessing that awaits the sleeping, holy dead ! The dust of the 
 Christian reposes in quietude until the voice of Jesus shall bid 
 the slumberer arise in perfect beauty, in His own likeness, and 
 suited to the happy spirit, and both now joyfully mingling with 
 the blessed of the Lord in the kingdom prepared from the 
 foundation of the world. Happy Christian ! Your journey 
 here was thorny, and the last enemy may even now be look- 
 ing upon you ; but, take courage ; the time will come when 
 this very body shall rise again to life immortal, and soul and 
 15* 
 
346 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 body be ever with the Lord, increasing in beauty, growing in 
 knowledge and glory through eternity. Happy saint ! Oh, 
 to meet, too, with those we love, the dear departed ones for 
 whom we have mourned ! We shall meet again. Jesus on 
 the throne will rejoice with us when He beholds our happiness 
 complete, Himself its sole author and finisher. Oh, the glory 
 of that moment ! Preach much on the resurrection of the be- 
 liever. It will encourage, perhaps, many a timid, sorrowful 
 spirit. I find it so when able to glance at it myself. How 
 wearisome is now the poor body, creeping to the grave, and 
 Satan ever ready to suggest his * ifs ' and ' buts ! ' It is a dying 
 body, but it shall rise again. Jesus has said it. Lord, increase 
 my faith." 
 
 " I was so thankful to-day, so refreshed and comforted, in 
 reading your welcome letter, that it led me with a heart full 
 of love to a throne of grace. I closed my door, and kneeling 
 before my chair, gave vent to my grateful and deep emotions 
 to Him who heareth His own redeemed, bought with His 
 precious blood, always. Oh, the matchless love that is in our 
 reconciled Father's heart ! Can we suppose for a moment that 
 He sees not our trials, temptations, and conflicts ; and that He 
 is not caring for, and watching over us ? Oh, no ; God is with 
 us and for us, working all things, even now, for our good and 
 His glory." 
 
 " Saturday morning. — I have just been praying for you, and 
 I do feel I have the ear of the most blessed, the most precious, 
 most loving God and Saviour that ever poor sinner had to 
 deal with. I am often overwhelmed with such a sense of His 
 wonderful condescension, that language fails me, and I can do 
 little else than weep. Oh, how strange that He should listen, 
 and so listen, as if He said, Yes^ yes, to every request I make ! 
 He overcomes me with His love. He breaks my heart, then 
 heals it again. It is His love that does it. He gives godly 
 sorrow ; puts forth His hand and draws me near to Himself, 
 and then says, What is thy j)etition, and ivhat is thy request f 
 Then I hasten to tell Him all, all, as if I feared He would 
 withdraw before I could do so. But He lingers and listens, 
 and then sends me away rejoicing that I have such a Friend 
 in heaven, and longing to drop this body of sin and death, that 
 I might be with Him. Oh, God is such an ocean of love to 
 me! The more His wondrous love is manifested, the more I 
 hate and abhor myself Tins is your God, too. And though 
 
DIARY. 347 
 
 He tries the faith of His people, He will appear. Remember, 
 Joseph was two long years in prison, after he had got the 
 promise from the chief butler ; and no doubt his faith was 
 sharply tried, for God had partly given him the promise, by 
 enabling him to interpret the dream. But, at last, the promise 
 was fulfilled, and the blessing came in rich abundance. Take 
 courage. He is the same now that He ever was." 
 
 " This morning while the children were surrounding my 
 breakfast table, I spoke to them of some of the providential 
 dealings of God with me, passing through this wilderness- 
 world, by land and by sea. Among others, was brought to 
 my recollection the circumstance of my embarking on board 
 ship on a long voyage to Bermuda, in ill-health, going to join 
 the regiment to which we belonged. Our provisions were 
 nearly exhausted ; and there was little else on board but salt 
 meat, fit only for the hardy sailors, and most unsuitable for me, 
 an invalid just recovering from a severe illness. But the Lord 
 sent a calm, and with the calm a shoal of dolphins alongside, 
 which followed us from that time a great part of the passage, 
 affording us a wholesome meal every day, of great delicacy. 
 Oh, how wonderful is our God in all His dealings with the 
 children of men ! My soul is refreshed, and I have been on 
 my knees to thank Him for bringing these incidents to my re- 
 membrance. It is good to call to mind the many deliverances 
 we have met with from the hand of cur God. Shall we not 
 often think of them, and tell them to our children, and recount 
 them by the way ? Lord, pardon my heartless sin of unbelief, 
 and let my w4iole heart sweetly, safely confide in Thee. I am 
 afraid your health is not as good as it was. Try and cast this 
 burden on the Lord, and He will help you. I know^ He is 
 willing as He is able. Only believe, and let the precept be as 
 precious as the promise, and the Lord w^ill appear for you in 
 His own good time. Wait on the Lord. The Lord exercises 
 faith, and this is needful to conform us to His own lovely like- 
 ness. We want to be like Christ, but we do not like the way 
 He takes to make us so. What a mercy it is that He takes 
 His own way, and not ours ! Fear not^ is the dear Redeemer's 
 watchword to His saints. Why should we fear? Are not 
 our worthless names written in the Lamb's book of life ? If 
 He is ours, and we are His, will He withhold anything that is 
 really good for us ? No, not even the rod ; for that is often 
 for our good. I wonder how it is that Christians do not fear 
 
348 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 the rod more than they do. They think that God is altogether 
 such as themselves, and will not chasten His beloved child 
 when He sees he needs it. But He will chasten, because he is 
 His child ; and that, too, should make us hate sin, and watch 
 against its risings in our hearts ; though love is a more influ- 
 ential grace than/e«r." 
 
 "I had one of my alarming fainting fits, and often think I 
 may go off in one of them. And if indeed ready, which I 
 trust I am, what a mercy would this be ! Absent from the 
 body, I should be present with the Lord.* I am better, but 
 feeble. God be praised for all His love-tokens. These visita- 
 tions are nothing more. They are designed to prepare us for 
 our glorious inheritance above. The oftener the gold is put 
 in the furnace, the more the dross is consumed, and the brighter 
 it shines. In the trial, we cling closer to Jesus ; we see more 
 of His loving heart, and imbibe more of His holy image. We 
 cannot come in close contact with Christ, and not get good. 
 Touch but the hem of His garment, and virtue flows. Last 
 night I rode to the Episcopal Chapel, West-street, to hear one 
 of a course of twelve sermons on the New Covenant. Some 
 of these sermons have been excellent, but this last evening 
 was rather prosy. I could not see with the good man, and 
 think he overstrained the Scriptures. However, the subject is 
 well worth close investigation. There is a volume just out, 
 composed of twelve sermons, one of which is by Mr. James 
 Haldane Stewart, on the present signs of the times, which are 
 considered very ominous. They are looking for judgment on 
 the Gentile church, and the restoration of God's ancient peo- 
 ple ; and certainly there is a moving of the waters in that 
 quarter just now. Oh, that God might give us a right judg- 
 ment in all things ! May he keep you steady to your princi- 
 ples, and enable you to hold fast that which you have received 
 and been taught by the Holy Ghost ! Trying times are 
 coming upon the church of Christ ; men's souls will be tried 
 as gold is tried in the furnace." 
 
 " The way the Lord is teaching you is the right way. To 
 be well acquainted with our own hearts, is to bring us nearer 
 
 * " I'etter a thousand times live under the government and tutory of 
 Christ, than to your own, and hve at will Live in Christ, and you 
 are in the suburbs of heaven ; there is but a thin wall between you 
 and the land of praises, — ye are within an hour's sailing of the shore 
 of the new Canaan. — Rutherford. 
 
DIARY. 349 
 
 to Jesus, and to make us more firmly cling to the Cross. Your 
 poor heart is the same as it was years ago, but there was no 
 light to show its evil. But as you grow in grace, you will see 
 more and more the goodness of God in the gift of His dear 
 Son, to make an all-sufficient atonement for sinners so vile and 
 utterly helpless as we are. It is a great mercy that, while 
 the Holy Ghost opens up the deep fountain of iniquity within 
 to our view. He also, at the same time, shows us the Fountain 
 open, always open, in which we may wash and be clean. This 
 makes Jesus so precious to the deeply -taught Christian. To be 
 well acquainted with your own heart is worth all the pain you 
 may be called to suffer. I am often tempted to say to you, 
 make the most of your time now to acquaint yourself w^ith 
 God. A time of affliction is like material thrown into the 
 ground to enrich it, that it produce a good harvest in good 
 time. This is rather a homely way of expressing what I 
 mean ; nevertheless, I refer you to the whole tenor of Scrip- 
 ture for the truth of this. Sweet affliction, that brings us near 
 to God." 
 
 " Oh, to have the heart right with God ! It is so awfully 
 deceitful, and wo are so continually more or less deceived by 
 it, that we fancy all is right, when, in fact, all may be wrong. 
 Then comes the trial. The rod our all-wise Father will not 
 withhold. And what a mercy it is to be able to bear the rod, 
 and to see the cause ! But how often do we close our ears, 
 and go on in our crooked way until he speaks by some louder 
 and yet heavier blow ! and then it is our mercy to run at once 
 into the tender, loving bosom of God, confess our sin, and beg 
 for renewed grace, to enable us to forsake it. I do not think 
 there was ever one of His own dear children who more re- 
 quired this discipline than myself. I seem to need the rod all 
 the way to heaven. Well, if I can only see a Father's loving 
 hand in it all, and it does but endear Christ to me, it is weliy 
 
 " Lord's-day. — I am still poorly, and kept at home. You 
 are now in the midst of your sermons. May the Lord's sen- 
 sible presence be with you. May you preach as if the Lord's 
 eye, not the eyes of the people, were full upon you. May the 
 Iloly Ghost clothe His truth with power, that every soul may 
 hear and feel it, and that great good may be done in the name 
 of Jesus, sinners converted, and saints rc-converted ; the one 
 is as much needed as the other. Nature sometimes puts on a 
 show of religion, and will go a great way vrhile i\\Q heart is 
 
350 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 not changed, and the fear of God and the love of the Spirit is 
 not there, and is not known. Thousands, I fear, deceive them- 
 selves into this resemblance of religion ; and it is a great mercy, 
 if, when death looks them in the face, the Lord divests them 
 of all false confidence, and brings them guilty to the Fountain 
 open for sin and uncleanness. Then, and then only, do thoy 
 know what real conversion is — sorrow for sin, and joy in God." 
 
 "Yesterday I was enabled to go twice to the House of God, 
 and the Lord did bless the truths I heard, and sweetly drew 
 out my heart's best affections to Himself, particularly at the 
 Supper, and during the reading and singing of the hymns. As 
 dear Mrs. Graham says, ' My memory fails me as to the text, 
 &c., and yet my soul is fed and strengthened by the word.' " 
 
 The illness and death of one who had sustained to her for 
 above twenty years the closest relation of a friend, and the yet 
 more sacred and enduring relation of a pastor — during which 
 period not a wavelet had ruffled the surface, nor a cloud had 
 shaded the glow of a friendship which God had made the 
 channel of so much mutual blessing — would naturally elicit 
 some of the tenderest features of her Christianity. Hearing 
 of the illness of the Rev, J. H. Evans, she thus seeks to com- 
 fort and cheer him : — 
 
 " Yes, beloved, even your present trial shall be to 
 
 the praise of His dear and holy name. Be of good cheer ! 
 God has commissioned it as a message of love, nothing but 
 love, — eternal, never-ending love. The Lord sent you to 
 preach glad tidings to poor, lost sinners, to gather in His own 
 sheep, feeding them in rich pastures, and causing them to lie 
 down by the side of still waters. But now He has closed 
 your lips for a season. He who sent you to preach, now bids 
 you cease until He says, * Go again, and preach the preaching 
 that I bid thee.' Well, beloved, is He not as full of love in 
 all this as ever? Just the very same. Only trust Him for 
 all consequences. He is doing all things well. Leave your- 
 self in His blessed hands, and seek more for cheerful submission 
 than for the removal of the trial. Be earnest for submission, 
 and He will give it, and resignation will follow, and then, what 
 a calm ! Oh, how soothing is the voice of the Beloved ! How 
 it hushes to rest all the agitated feelings ! To be quiet in His 
 hands, and feel that His will must be best, because He is God, 
 and knows the end from the beginning, Avhile we know noth- 
 ino: ! All our wisdom is in cur adorable Head. How earnest 
 
LETTERS TO REV. J. H. EVANS. 351 
 
 and restless I was to be liealed (when lame), but no healing 
 came, until prompted by the Spirit to ask for submission, and 
 in a moment it was given ! God the Holy Ghost indited the 
 petition, and God the Father heard it, and all was peace within. 
 And what then ? After awhile the healing most unexpectedly 
 came, and I was made whole. So may it be with you, my 
 tried and beloved brother. Be assured this affliction is sent 
 for some special good, and a great blessing to your own soul 
 and to the church at large. I would not now have been with- 
 out my trial for a thousand worlds. Oh, the goodness of God ! 
 His name is love, and wondrous is He in all His dealings with 
 us ; and He is deahng with us every moment of our brief ex- 
 istence, and we are dealing with Him. How little does the 
 world know of the wonderful transaction that is going on every 
 instant between earth and heaven — the constant intercourse 
 between God and His chosen and adopted family ! But why 
 should I enlarge upon this subject to one so much better taught 
 than I am? Only you are now in the trial, and I have just 
 come out of it, and may be allowed to speak a word of comfort 
 to your dear and tried soul. Be assured it will be well, it must 
 be well, for it is the Lord who doth all things well. Many 
 are the afflictions of the righteous : hut the Lord delivereth him 
 out of them all. I believe, though the Lord may try your 
 faith to the utmost, yet that He will appear for you ; only 
 leave yourself in His loving hands. Some great good will 
 come out of this trial. It is much more difficult to be quiet 
 and passive than to labour. We want always to be doing ; 
 but the Lord says. Be stilly and knoiu that I am God. Fare- 
 well ! May the Lord comfort, heal, and guide you in every 
 step you take, and enable you to repose passive in His dear 
 hands, is the prayer of your affectionate sister in a precious 
 Jesus." 
 
 "Beloved brother and fellow-traveller in the kingdom of 
 God, it is through much tribulation we are to enter into His 
 kingdom of glory above. I have heard of the late trial your 
 Father has sent in much love. When we arrive at home, and 
 trace our steps through this wilderness, we shall see that every 
 trial, cross, and disappointment was needful, and that the work 
 would not have been complete without all, even the least. 
 Our loving God and Father takes no pleasure in afflicting us; 
 but it is by these things we are brought to be better acquainted 
 with ourselves and with Him, He does it all. Even this fall 
 
352 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 from the carriage is designed to produce some great good. . . . 
 Can anything happen to you or to me but what God does in 
 love to our souls? Oh, that He may remove every wish 
 contrary to His present dispensation towards you, giving you 
 cheerful submission 1 He will take care of His own church. 
 John-street church is His, not yours. Be not any more care- 
 ful about it. The Lord wants to have you to himself; and oh, 
 you will find it sweet to be alone with Jesus ! Is it not a 
 great and might privilege to be shut out from labor, and to be 
 shut in with Grod ? You will yet see the goodness and loving- 
 kindness of God in thus setting you aside from your work, 
 pleasant as it was to you, and keeping you for Himself. I 
 feel quite sure, dear and beloved brother, that you will have to 
 bless and praise Him for all His present dealings with you. 
 He will open his ever-loving heart to you, and you shall see 
 more of the heart of God than ever you have done before. . . . 
 Oh, that we could always believe all that He says of Himself! 
 He is the same God that He was to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. 
 Does He not often speak to us now by the still, small voice of 
 His Spirit, and does He not allow us often to speak to Him as 
 a man would to his dearest friend ? "Will He not do us all the 
 good we need? Are we not in His heart, and can anything 
 happen to us but what He designs, and comes to us with a 
 blessing? Are we not one with Christ, and is not Christ one 
 with us ? And now, dear, precious brother, if you have had 
 patience to wade through this, accept my thanks, and be 
 assured I often have you in my mind and on my heart. Cast 
 all your care on Him, for He careth for you. He will do all 
 things for you and for John-street church too. He is better 
 able to bear the burden than you are. Lie contented in His 
 loving hands, and let Him take His own way with you. You 
 would be working for Him, but He says to you, 'Be still, and 
 know that I am the best Judge of what is good for you !' 
 Heaven will be no idle place. God has a work for you there. 
 I love to think of heaven. What a change ! To see and be 
 with Jesus — to be like Him — a pure spirit mingling with pure 
 spirits — perfect holiness — perfect love. Let us take courage 
 and look up. My love to your dear wife. Let us join to 
 praise and bless our God that He has spared your life, and may 
 you be able to trust Him fully to the end." 
 
 About three months after the preceding letters were written, 
 we find the following mournful record in her diary : — 
 
353 
 
 "December 4, 1849. — Heard to-day of dear Mr. Evan's 
 escape from a bodj of suffering to a land of glory. It took 
 place on the 1st, at about six o'clock in the morning. He 
 died in Scotland, and the remains are to be brought to town 
 for interment on the 6th. Praise G-od for the blessed and good 
 hope, through grace, of life eternal beyond the grave. A letter, 
 addressed to the church, thus speaks of some of his closing 
 moments : ' I said to him, I felt sure that prayer was made for 
 liim that day, and that I had written to the church that he was 
 worse.' He said, ' You should tell them the state of my mind.' 
 I then asked him if he had any message, and he answered, 
 ' Tell them I stand accepted in the Beloved, notwithstanding 
 all my sins and infirmity.' In a minute after, he proceeded, 
 'I never felt more than now my sins, but in Jesus I stand, 
 Jesus is a panacea.' It being previously remarked how soon 
 he would be with Jesus, in a few minutes he said, 'And am I 
 so near eternal glory, and not more rejoicing in it?' It was 
 replied, 'But do you;' to which he answered, 'In a measure.' 
 When sympathy and tenderness were expressed to him, he said, 
 'But soon to be with Jesus, whom I love — who loved me 
 before I loved Him.' And now he is luiili Jesus^ partaking of 
 His fulness of joy, happiness and glory. The days of his 
 mourning are ended for ever." 
 
 This deeply-felt bereavement elicited the following character- 
 istic letter of sacred sympathy, addressed to the w4dow of her 
 lamented pastor: — 
 
 December 15, 1849. 
 
 "My dear and prp:cious Sister in the Lord, — 
 
 "I think I wrote you such an unfeeling letter yester- 
 day, that I have been quite distressed about it; but I did so 
 fully and truly realize the joy, the glory, the full, overflowing 
 cup of happiness of the dear departed one, that I did not, as I 
 ought to have done, sufficiently consider your loneliness, deep 
 sorrow, and long dreary nights of watching, while looking 
 upon suffering you had no power to alleviate; and now those 
 sorrowful hours and scenes are passing before your imagination, 
 and Satan will be busy in bringing them to your recollection, 
 for he seeks to harass those whom God loves. May faith be 
 given to you to enable you to look above, and in due time to 
 rejoice with him in spirit, who now no longer is a sufferer here 
 in this vale of tears, and who would say to you, ' Weep no 
 more for me, for the days of mv mourninsr are ended, and 1 
 
354 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 have entered into the joy of my Lord. I have seen Jesus 
 whom I loved, and lo ! the half of His glory, His goodness, and 
 His love, was not told me while below.' Dear sister, ere long, 
 and we shall both be away too, and we shall see him again, 
 and all spend a glorious and an endless eternity together." 
 
 "There is so much lurking infidelity in our fjillen nature, 
 that we httle reahze what God has said in His blessed word, 
 and therefore we do so little go on our way rejoicing. It will 
 be according to our faith, here and there too. It is faith that 
 enables us to realize what the Lord has promised, and brings 
 us into close contact with Christ here; and in the same pro- 
 portion as we have Christ in our souls here, we shall have 
 Christ in our souls there. And although there will be no lack 
 to any — for every vessel will be full — yet the larger vessels 
 will hold more in the very same proportion they did here below. 
 So that we need, not only for our present comfort and useful- 
 ness, to live upon Christ as much as we can here, but with the 
 blessed hope before us of enjoying Him to the utmost when we 
 hereafter shall arrive in the regions of the blessed. Such is 
 now my dear brother's complete felicity. He is with Jesus, 
 and Jesus is with him. His vessel is full, and it will be 
 enlarging through eternity, capable of holding more and more 
 of God, and that throughout the existence of God Himself. I 
 am persuaded we are great losers by not fully realizing what 
 God has promised us, and by not dwelling more on the glorious 
 realities of the world to come, and also by losing sight of our 
 nearness to Christ. Christ has been with you in all your late 
 deep trial, and He is with you now. See what a Friend you 
 have by your side — to talk to in your solitude — to tell Him all 
 you feel and fear, all you wish and want ! Oh, what a Friend 
 is Jesus! He is better than ten thousand husbands and children. 
 What a Friend has he been to worthless me ! I could not live 
 without Hmi here, nor in heaven either. He is the chief of all 
 my joys, and my comfort by day and by night. Dear, precious 
 sister, sucli will He be to you. The Lord says to you, ' Cleave 
 to Me. I am thine, and thou art mine. Ask what you will, 
 and I will do it. Ask, that your joy may be full. I will 
 never leave thee nor forsake thee. Keep thy steadfast eye 
 upon thine inheritance; a few more days of trial, and thou shalt 
 be Avith Me.' I would f lin comfort you with the comfort with 
 wliicli God has comforted me. This life is a dark passage to 
 a world of liglit and glory above. Many whom we love are 
 
r.KTTKRS FROM HER LATE PASTOR. ^00 
 
 there, having outrun us in the race ; but we shall meet them 
 again, and recount together all the way He has led us through 
 the wilderness ; and, if there could be weeping in heaven, we 
 should weep there, that we so faintly beheved all He told us 
 while here." 
 
 But two unpuljlished notes addressed to her by Mr. Evans, 
 remain. They are so beautifully characteristic of the writer, 
 that they may form a befitting close to the reference which 
 this volume has so frequently and necessarily made to this 
 eminent Christian, and beloved and lamented minister of 
 Christ. 
 
 " My beloved Friend, — 
 
 " Grace, mercy, and peace be with you and yours. 
 All things are in the hands of that Jesus whom we love, and 
 who, wonderful thought ! loves us. He bears us and our low 
 concerns upon His heart, and into those hands would I ever 
 commit myself and mine. He who has borne my sins, must 
 bear my sorrows and cares, great and small. . . . However 
 sweet the stream, the channel down which it flows and the 
 source from whence it springs give it a double sweetness. On 
 the Lord will I wait, and for Him too. My dear sister, we 
 shall soon be in the eternal world — with Jesus — eternally 
 happy, and infinitely, in Him. This may well lift us above 
 all anxiety. I last night preached Balch's funeral sermon. 
 The chapel was crowded, and the subject was deeply solemn, 
 and I as usual, was alas ! alas ! very much below the occasion. 
 But the Lord will humble me in the pulpit. It is my dispen- 
 sation — in tender love does He it — and I need it. With kind 
 Christian regards, and affectionate remembrance to your 
 daughther, ever believe me, dear sister, 
 
 "Your ever affectionate, 
 
 "J. H. Evans." 
 
 "My dear and beloved Sister in a precious 
 Saviour, — 
 
 "How great is our mercy that we know Christ, or 
 rather, are known of Him ! and how cheering is the thought 
 that we, through wondrous grace, shall soon see Him whom 
 our soul loveth ! Your letter refreshed our souls. It was 
 sweet to us. It had the savour of His name in it ; and by the 
 power of the same Spirit who indited it, was it made as oint- 
 ment to our souls. Dear and precious sister, we are but slow 
 
MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 learners of the two great truths of the gospel ; the one, that 
 *bj grace ye are saved;' the other, 'Christ is all.' And I 
 believe that they are but half learned, even at the last. Oh, 
 how deep is the power of sin and Satan, ignorance and unbelief, 
 •in our poor hearts ! all working together to hide this precious 
 object from our sight. How often do even lawful things, and 
 things which in themselves He approves of, still tend to this, 
 except the blessed Spirit breaks through all and shows Him 
 to us! 
 
 "And yet amidst all our neglects, and coldness, and ingrati- 
 tude, still He bears with us, comes over the mountains of our 
 base forgetfuhiess, and restoreth our souls. I am sometimes 
 led to think, that even in heaven one shall weep to think of 
 the returns which He has received from our treatment of Him ; 
 but all tears shall be wiped away, if any are shed there, by 
 His own blessed hands. 
 
 "It will rejoice you, I am well assured, to be told by me, 
 that I am wonderfully better than I was; and, although the 
 complaint has not quite left me, yet, through the tender mercy 
 of our God and Father, it has nearly done so. For fourteen 
 nights I was quite unable to lie down in my bed, and they 
 were generally sleepless nights. But I was not alone, and I felt 
 it. I fully believe dear sister, that this attack has an especial 
 message in it. May the Eternal Spirit cause me to learn it, yea, 
 all of it; unimproved mercies — and such are trials, overlooked; 
 the loving hand which sends them, and the infinite necessity 
 there w^as for them ; the secret sins they are meant to detect ; 
 and the gracious discoveries they are intended to disclose of 
 the unutterable fulness of Jesus and the Divine goodness, — are 
 very serious things. 
 
 "I have lost much by this in past days. May He who is 
 able, give me full possession of this especial dispensation. 
 With my very kindest love to dear , and every affec- 
 tionate remembrance to all his, and especial affection to E ; 
 
 and with every prayer that your own soul may be filled with 
 all the fulness of God, 
 
 " Ever yours, with truest affection, 
 
 "J. H. Evans." 
 
 How unconsciously did she betray her own spiritual progress 
 in her anxiety for the advance of Christ's kingdom in the souls 
 of others ! Writing to a beloved family whose parent pre- 
 
SOLICITUDE FOR SPIRITUAL PROGRESS. 357 
 
 ceded her only a few weeks previous to her own departure to 
 the "rest that remaineth for the people of God," she earnestly 
 inquires : — 
 
 "How is it, dear, dear friends, with your precious souls? 
 Are you speeding on your way ? I have not heard from you 
 of late. Is there not one among you to tell me how matters 
 stand between you and our best Friend ? Are there no new 
 communications from above? Have you nothing to say to a 
 poor weary traveller, on the same road with yourself? Well, 
 I must say a little about it to you, which may encourage us 
 all, — me to write, and you to join me to praise and bless His 
 holy name who is preparing us all for that happy, blessed place 
 He has gone to prepare for us. How little, beloved, do we 
 think of this as we ought! How faintly we realize it! 
 How little do we believe what God has promised us. Oh, 
 for a stronger faith to give full credit to what we read of God's 
 word! We are travelling home to God. This is not, and 
 never was intended to be, our rest. It is a wilderness we are 
 passing through, and shame, shame to us, that we so often want 
 to sit down amidst its weeds and briers, and amuse ourselves 
 with the trifles of a fallen world lying in the wicked one. All 
 here is polluted and tainted by sin, therefore does Christ say, 
 ArisCj my love, my fair one, and come away. Dear friends, 
 tell me how it fares with your souls. Do you find Christ more 
 precious day by day. Let us keep very near to Him, sensibly 
 so. Oh, there is a joy unspeakable in walking near to Jesus — 
 m having daily, sweet holy intercourse with Him — never 
 satisfied to have our best Friend out of sight !" 
 
 " 6th. — Beloved in the Lord, I do love you all most tenderly, 
 not only in Christ, but for your own sakes too, and cannot be 
 reconciled to lose sight of you ; so do let hear. I have this one 
 evidence, if I have no other, of my election of God — I love 
 all the saints in the bowels of Jesus Christ. I feel a oneness 
 to them that I feel to no other. But oh, what will that love 
 be when we get above ? It is there I am looking. There is 
 my only, my best Friend, and there is my heart. Behold 
 Him seated on His throne, and all the goodly company of the 
 redeemed around Him. Oh, the blessedness of beholding all 
 His unveiled beauties, and of basking in the sunshine of His 
 countenance ! Does not your heart burn within you when you 
 think of these things — these glorious realities? My heart is 
 full to overflowing ; for I have just been at His blessed foot- 
 
358 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 Btool, and had a few holy, precious moments of intercourse 
 with Him. But I must tell you of two sermons yesterday. 
 In the morning, from the words. He endured as seeing Him 
 who is invisible. — Heb. xi, 27. In this discourse Jehovah was 
 exhibited as revealed in Jesus. Jesus, the visible manifesta- 
 tion of the invisible Grod. In the evening, from the words, 
 Bat ive see Jesus, Heb. ii. 9. I cannot express to you how my 
 heart rejoiced in God my Saviour, while listening to such an 
 exhibition of His glory, though robed in humanity for our 
 redemption. I wept for joy; my heart was overflowing. 
 Well beloved, we shall all soon see Him eye to eye, face to 
 face. Do not let us lose sight of Him altogether. There is 
 much of heaven to be enjoyed while here, a foretaste of what 
 we shall realize through eternity. Let us hold fast the pro- 
 fession of our faith, without wavering. We are pretty well. 
 
 Dear little E , from her spinal affection, is still reclining 
 
 upon her back. This is a trial of faith, but we must all have 
 them ; they are good for us — are disguised blessings. Nothing 
 but good from the hands of Him who loved us unto the death. 
 He could do no more than die for us. Yes, He rose again. 
 Blessed be His dear name. He did all that He could to save 
 us from eternal woe, and bring us to eternal glory. Farewell, 
 beloved sister in a beloved Lord. May you enjoy much of 
 His presence." 
 
 TO HER SON O- 
 
 " .... I went, according to invitation, to the 
 
 T 's yesterday. The admiral led me down to lunch, and 
 
 afterwards left, to meet an engagement. We retired to the 
 drawing-room, and had a sweet conversation. I think Christ 
 was there, for our communion was of Hitn. You will be 
 
 amused to hear that Lady C (Lady T -'s mother) and 
 
 myself met at a dinner-party in Bermuda, fifty-seven years 
 ago, both of us then young, and but recently married! Now 
 we meet as old ladies, but, best of all, as followers of the Lamb, 
 saved and sanctified by sovereign grace. How strangely 
 people are thrown together in this wide, wide, wilderness world! 
 But, oh, the home of the blessed, where all the saints shall 
 meet, and know as they are known! I am reading your book, 
 every now and then ; may the Lord bless it to the quickening 
 of saints and sinners. I cannot but think it would be better to 
 
LETTER TO HER SON, . 359 
 
 place quotations from God's word in italics.* I had a sweet, 
 refreshing, and heartbreaking view of the infinite goodness of 
 God on first rising this morning. It was a melting of love to 
 my soul, so plainly could I read my interest in Christ, and my 
 title to my home in heaven. I have not lost its richness yet, 
 nor the deep sense of my worthlessness. Truly, the goodness 
 of God leadeth to repentance. I did not forget you. May the 
 Lord's choicest blessings rest upon you all !" 
 
 " Sabbath Morning, — I have just been praying for you. 
 Oh, that He might answer the prayer, and put strength in 
 body and soul, and the fulness of the Spirit in the word 
 preached, that all may feel that the Lord of a truth has sent 
 you with a message of mercy to all who hear it ! ... This is 
 another cause of gratitude to Him who deals so lovingly and 
 graciously towards us. Let us praise Him now, and praise 
 not only with our lips, but may our lives show forth His praise, 
 by walking before Him in all the holy precepts of the Gospel. 
 If ye love Affi, keoj) my commandments. Not one nor two only, 
 but all. It is not given us to choose which we shall keep, and 
 which we shall break. Oh, for a closer walk ! To walk in 
 company with Jesus — side by side — my hand in His hand — 
 my eye on His eye — my heart ever toward Him ; this is fel- 
 lowship with God's dear Son. How have I been wrestling for 
 you to day ! May He give you a holy, happy Sabbath ! May 
 the word be attended with the power of the Holy Ghost to 
 every soul present ! I have prayed for quietness of soul, and 
 for healing for the poor head." 
 
 Her pen, always at home in the Lord's work, was never 
 
 * A striking coincidence of opinion on tliis point with that of Mrs. 
 Isabella Grraham, whom she personally knew, and whom in so many 
 features she resembled, may be worthy of note, " Mrs. Graham," ob- 
 serves her biographer, '• was very partial to the works of Dr. John Owen, 
 the Rev. W. Romaine. and the Rev. John Newton, and read them with 
 pleasure and profit. One day she remarked to Mr. Bethune, that she 
 preferred the ancient writers on theology to the modern, because they 
 dealt more in italics. 'Dear mother,' he replied, 'what religion can 
 there be in italics?' 'You know,' said she, -that old writers expected 
 credit for tiie doctrines they taught by proving them, from the word of 
 God, to be correct: they inserted the Scripture pas-ages in italics, and 
 their works have been sometimes one-half in italics. Modem writers on 
 theology, on the contrary, give us a long train of reasoning to persuade 
 us to their opinions, but very little in italics.' This remark of hers has 
 great force in it, and deserves the attention of those who write, and those 
 who read, on theological subjects." — Life of Mrs. Lmhdla Grahim. 
 
360 MEMOIR OP MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 more appropriatelj or usefully employed than in imparting 
 spiritual instruction and encouragement to individuals anxiously 
 and earnestly seeking the Saviour. To her own heart He was 
 so truly precious, and to her mind to believe in Him was so 
 exceedingly simple, that it was her peculiar delight to meet 
 and aid a soul earnestly asking the way of salvation. To 
 specimens of her letters addressed to the unconverted — to those 
 of Christian sympathy — and to others appropriate to various 
 circumstances and states of mind, we add a few selections from 
 her correspondence, especially illustrating her peculiar gift in 
 leading the anxious, tremulous mind to a full repose in Christ. 
 
 TO LADY A. DE CAPEL B- 
 
 '' Dear Lady B April 20. 
 
 " How kind of you to write to me that little note, 
 when your suffering head must have rendered it an exertion ! 
 It is a mercy for you and me that there is a Head w^hich is 
 always right, and a heart, too, that is ever disposed to do us all 
 possible good. Oh, to have such a Friend as Jesus is in the 
 court of heaven, who feels all our sorrows, carries all our bur- 
 dens, and has promised to bring us safely through this trying 
 world, and place us at last at His own right hand, where neither 
 sickness nor sorrow shall ever come ! Dear friend, let me com- 
 mend you to keep close to this precious Friend, who can only 
 be spiritually known and seen by the eye of faith. To all 
 others he is invisible. Faith can discern Him when sense ut- 
 terly fails. But it is our mercy, that, though this world knows 
 and sees Him not, yet He does and will make Himself known 
 to those who seek Him with their whole heart. Oh, the kind- 
 ness, the loving-kindness that fills the heart of Jesus towards 
 one poor feeble soul who can but waft a sigh, a wish, a desire 
 towards Him ! To such. His heart in a moment responds. 
 Oh, how attentively He listens to hear, and how eager to 
 respond to tlie first pulsation that arises in the soul towards 
 Himself! That desire to know and love Him is the blessed 
 work of His own Holy Spirit. Dear friend, go to Him just as 
 you are, nor rest short of a holy, familiar, abiding sense of His 
 presence. To know Him is life, and life eternal. He says, / 
 a7n the way, the truth, and the life. How sweetly and lovingly 
 He invites us. Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy 
 laden, and I will give you rest. If you and I have come and 
 cast ourselves at His blessed feet, we need fear nothing, for 
 
LETTERS TO H. AND E. S . 361 
 
 He will do all things well for us, here and hereafter. I could 
 fill a dozen sheets on this precious subject, but will not fatigue 
 you to read more than is needful to assure you of my sincere 
 desire and good wishes for returning health, and that body and 
 
 soul may prosper. My Christian love to dear Miss T , 
 
 She belongs to Jesus, and is one of His fold. My sheep hear 
 ray voice^ and I know them, and they follow me. I know my 
 sheep, and am known of mine. Oh, it is a mercy of mercies to 
 know Jesus as my Shepherd. May he draw you nearer and 
 nearer to Himself." 
 
 TO H. AND E. S . 
 
 " My beloved Friends, — 
 
 " I have been thinking of you, and thinking of Jesus 
 too. What a heart has Christ ! Do you know what it is 
 made of? It is an ocean of goodness. It is a sea, fathomless 
 and shoreless, of matchless love — ^love to poor sinners who but 
 look to Him or sigh for Him. It is the joy of His heart to 
 save sinners. This was His express mission to our world. 
 Then would I have you look, not to your evidences, or to your 
 own goodness, or to your unworthiness, but to Jesus, with a 
 believing heart, and you shall be saved in Christ and for 
 Christ. By simply believing in the Lord Jesus, He becomes 
 one with you, and you one with Him, the Holy Spirit taking 
 possession of your souls for Himself. In a little while, and we 
 pass away, and one thing only is needful. Come, then, to 
 Jesus, and be saved ; and give Him no rest until He manifests 
 Himself to you, as He has promised. We tvill come and mani- 
 fest ourselves unto you. This manifestation of the Lord Jesus 
 Christ to your souls, when you experience it, will be worth 
 more than millions of worlds to you. I am convinced you will 
 echo this when you receive the blessing. He waits to be 
 gracious, lingers for your coming, just as you are, not waiting 
 to make yourselves more acceptable. He undertakes to make 
 you all you ought to be, and will work in you to will and to 
 do, and all that is pleasing in His sight." 
 
 " If you will cultivate the habit of going and telling Jesus 
 all you wish or fear, you will find in Him a hearkening ear ; 
 and thus you will become acquainted with God and His peace. 
 Your desire is to know Jesus, to believe in Jesus, to be as- 
 sured of your interest in Jesus. Can there he a better way of 
 accomplishing this than bv going to Him in all simplicity, and 
 16 ' ' 
 
362 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 opening freely and fully your whole heart to Him ? Put from 
 you all cold formality, and deal with Christ as if He were now 
 what you read of Him when upon earth. He is the same that 
 He was then. He was never known to reject any that came 
 to Him for help ; nor will He turn Himself away from you. 
 Go to Him, and continue going until you can say, I have found 
 Him of whom Moses and the jjrophets did ivrite. Oh, the joy 
 and hope that will then spring up in your heart, when thus 
 you have found Him ! He is not far from you now. In one 
 moment you may make acquaintance with Jesus, and a pre- 
 cious Saviour you will find Him. And what a mercy it will 
 be to have such a Friend always near yuu, to guide, protect, 
 and bless you, and make you, in return, a Messing to others ! 
 Remember wresthng Jacob, who said, I will not let Thee go 
 until Thou bless me. This was that same Jesus with whom the 
 patriarch wrestled, who afterwards was manifested in a body 
 like ours, to pay to Divine justice our mighty debt, to suffer in 
 our stead, and who rose again from the dead, appeared to 
 Mary, and now waits to be gracious unto you.^' 
 
 " The Lord taketh pleasure in them that fear Him, in them 
 that hope in His mercy. On opening my Bible this morning, 
 my eye rested upon these words, and I thought, beloved 
 friends, of you. I felt they suited your state of mind. The 
 Lord your God, manifest in the flesh, taketh pleasure in you. 
 Go alone, and thank Him for this precious word, with a heart 
 fully open to His view. Have no concealments from your 
 best Friend. He loves an open, candid heart. He wants you 
 to approach Him with your low frames, with your bad feelings, 
 with your cold affections, with your wandering minds, with 
 your unbelieving hearts. He will listen to your voice, and 
 regard your wants, and do all that you can possibly think of, 
 and more than your highest thought or imagination can con- 
 ceive. The Lord is nigh unto all them that call upon Him, 
 unto all that call upon Him in truth. You shall never seek His 
 face in vain. One loving look from Christ will dissolve your 
 heart into love and sweet contrition. His invitation is. Look 
 unto Me, all ye ends of the earth, and he ye saved. And when the 
 Holy Ghost shall take of the things of Christ and show them 
 unto you, you will then say, ' Not half has been told me ; now 
 we know Him, not because you have told us, but because He 
 has made Himself known to us.' I long to see you rejoicing 
 in Christ, as if you were a part of myself I hope to welcome 
 
LETTERS TO H. AND E. S . 363 
 
 you in heaven. Think of 'the meeting there ! Who would 
 not strive for it ? Tarry not, nor stop, until you are quite sure 
 that you are saved." 
 
 " It seems to me that the chief concern of life is to get to 
 heaven. This, the grand object of our brief sojourn in this 
 vale of tears, should engross our every thought, and enlist 
 our utmost aim. Is not everything else that would allure us 
 from this great concern a device of the enemy, plying his ef- 
 forts and powers to divert us from our eternal interests ? My 
 beloved friends, keep your eyes open to the ten thousand 
 temptations of the enemy of souls, and cultivate a readiness to 
 obey the summons, which at any moment may come. Prepare 
 to meet thy God. The subject upon which I write is of the first 
 moment. How stands the matter between God and your 
 souls? Have you the sealing of the Holy Ghost? Has Jesus 
 manifested Himself to you ? Press the question upon your 
 consciences, and, oh, may the answer be an honest one ! A 
 heaven, with all its glory, or a hell, with all its horrors, is de- 
 pendent upon your present decision. A soul saved, or a soul 
 lost ! A soul eternally happy, or a soul eternally wretched ! 
 But Jesus stands ready to receive to his loving bosom every 
 poor sinner that comes to Him, in all his helplessness, for salva- 
 tion. May this be your happy case ! " 
 
 "I wish, my beloved friends, to quote a passage from God's 
 word, for your comfort, which arrested my attention in the 
 course of my reading, and my thoughts wandered to you in a 
 moment ; and may the Lord Jesus make it a quickening, com- 
 forting, refreshing portion to your precious souls. / know the 
 thoughts that I think towards you^ saith the Lord, thoughts of 
 peace and not of evil, to give you an expected end. Then shall 
 ye call upon Me, and ye shall go and pray unto Me, and I will 
 HEARKEN unto you. And ye shall seek Me, and find Me, ivhen 
 ye search for Me ivith all your heart. Jer. xxix. 11. Is not 
 this worth wrestling for ? Can you go a day or an hour with- 
 out receiving it? Seek earnestly, then, until you find the 
 Lord, and He says to you, lam thy salvation. The blessing is 
 ivithout money and without price. My soul travails in birth for 
 you, until Christ is formed within you, the hope of glory. 
 There is nothing in this poor, passing world that is to you, at 
 this present moment, of such vast consequence. Dear, very 
 dear are you to me, and I do feel that you are dear to the 
 heart of Jesus. You have my fervent, earnest prayers : and 
 
364 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 how will it gladden my heart to see you rejoicing in Christ 
 Jesus; and when you do, come and tell me, that we may 
 rejoice together," 
 
 " . . . Many thanks, dear, loved friends, for the flowers, 
 and also for the lights. I had some, but yours eclipse them 
 entirely, and burn beautifully at night, when mine are quenched 
 in darkness. Oh, that your spiritual light^ and mine too, may 
 shine brighter and brighter unto the perfect day! How 
 brightly will that light shine, when once introduced into the 
 glories of the upper world. No night there, for Jesus will be 
 the light and glory thereof. Beloved friends, press onward to 
 know more of this most precious Friend. I am very feeble ; 
 pray for me." 
 
 In the following extracts we trace the application of divine 
 truth to a more mature stage of Christian experience : — 
 
 TO MRS. H . 
 
 " Yesterday we had a day full of Christ — His 
 
 death and glorious resurrection. The Fast-day was a day of 
 feasting w4th our souls. The word was full of manna and fat- 
 ness ; from seven o'clock in the morning until half-past nine in 
 the evening, w^e were more or less in the sanctuary, humbling 
 ourselves at the feet of Jesus for the sins of the nation, and for 
 
 our own. The Lord was most blessedly with . The 
 
 word came with power, and accompanied with the unction of 
 the Spirit. It was a day long to be remembered by us. Dear 
 friend, what could we do without the Gospel ? It is bread to 
 the soul, the living soul, — for a dead soul does not value it; 
 but we need it, that we may grow in grace and in the know- 
 ledge of Jesus Christ, who is its sum and substance. "We 
 must feed upon him. 
 
 ' None but Jesus can do helpless sinners good.' 
 
 " . . . . How important it is that we should be quite sure 
 that we are on the right foundation. Is there, or can there be, 
 anything of equal importance to this ? And yet, how many 
 are wasting their precious time on the things of this poor 
 world they are so soon to leave, and are risking the never 
 dying soul, yet hastening on to the bar of God, unprepared for 
 that great day for which all other days were made ! Is not 
 this madness ? May the Lord make us faithful to them and 
 to others, urging all we love to flee from the wrath to come, 
 
LETTER TO MRS. W . 365 
 
 pointing them to the Lamb of God, whose Oiood, while it 
 cleanses us from all sin, sanctifies the heart. We often shrink 
 from this duty, and Satan endeavours to hinder us ; but Jesus 
 requires it at our hands, and by coming to Him, and telling 
 Him our weakness, He will strengthen us, and help us to do 
 His will. The text yesterday was, Who shall roll us away 
 the stone from the door of the sepulchre f And when they 
 looked, they saw that the stone was rolled aivay, for it was very 
 great. How often we have our stones of diflBculty lying in our 
 path ; and as often, when we come to the difficulty, we find 
 that the stone has been rolled away by a hand invisible to 
 mortal eye. But the saint of God knows whose it is." 
 
 TO MRS. w- 
 
 " I was just thinking of Jesus, our dearest, best, and never- 
 failing Friend, and I thought I should like to talk to you about 
 Him. It is so sweet to talk of one dear to us who is absent. 
 Bless God with me, that we are both so near our home, each 
 day's travel bringing us nearer and nearer. Our eyes shall 
 behold Him whom our souls love beyond all created good. 
 What a prospect is before us ! For ever with the Lord ! Oh, 
 for stronger faith, to give full credit to all we profess to believe ! 
 You will recollect I told you, I have more communion with 
 the saints above than with the saints below. Many whom I 
 meet seem to have so little to do with Him, and their acquaint- 
 ance with Him is so slight. Precious Jesus ! who would not 
 know Thee? and in knowing Thee, who would not love Thee? 
 I long to see Him, to tell Him how much I love Him, Is He 
 not all in all to us ? Are we not His, and is He not ours? 
 Does He not sit enthroned upon our heart's best affections. 
 Do we not commune with Him as a Friend to whom we can 
 open our entire heart, tell Him all, and Hsten to his gracious 
 response ? Oh, how precious this intercourse with One we 
 love, and who loves us ! My thoughts are, more or less, iu 
 heaven. There is Jesus ; the same gentleness, sympathy, and 
 goodness, portrayed on His blessed countenance, every feature 
 beaming with love, as w4ien on earth. Oh, beloved, let us join 
 to praise Him ! Help me to love Him better. We should bo 
 helpers of each other's joy. Our journey is drawing to an end. 
 Look forward, look upward. Jesu's eye is upon you; His 
 heart is towards you. A few more severe trials, a few more 
 staggering steps — and we are there /" 
 
MEMOIR OF MRS. M i.RY WINSLOW. 
 
 TO HER SON, RET. G r. W . 
 
 " .... I was grieved to hear was of a sceptical turn. 
 
 Oh, what a mercy to have godly parents ! and how much have 
 they to answer for, who have brought up their children to rest 
 their happiness only on a world that is passing away, and is 
 bearing them on to another. Godly parents cannot convert 
 their children ; God alone can do this. But they can lead 
 them to Jesus, and bring them up in the fear of the Lord ; and 
 when they have done this, they have done all they can do ; 
 for the Holy Ghost alone can change the heart, and this is 
 what we have to pray for, until we see them safe within the 
 ark. Every moment they are without it, is replete with 
 danger. They must be born again. Christ has said it. It 
 is not a change of sentiment, nor an outward reformation of life ; 
 it is a new heart imparted by the Holy Ghost; and when they 
 have it, they will know it. May we, who do know our sins 
 are pardoned, be fully sanctified, body, soul, and spirit for the 
 Lord. We want more devotedness of heart, more of the 
 single eye to His glory, and to feel more the value of precious 
 souls. Oh, think of lost souls — of the eternal woe, where the 
 worm dieth not, and the fire is not quenched ! Do we believe 
 God ? And has He not said this ? Let us, then, put far from 
 us all the false charity that leaves sinners to stand upon 
 the precipice, because we will not disturb their carnal 
 security." 
 
 TO HER SON . 
 
 " I have been feeble ; but this I must expect, 
 
 according to the course of things in this changing, fading world. 
 And when I look back upon, and think of all that I have 
 passed through, I have cause to bless and praise the Lord, 
 that I am as well as I am. I was glad to hear of the arrival 
 
 of Captain B 's vessel in Australia. I have felt anxious 
 
 for their safety, and have seldom forgotten them in my prayers. 
 Would they all knew the value of prayer! Oh, to live upon 
 Jesus — to live for Him — and in a measure, even now, to live 
 with Him! But I must not write you a long letter, for I know 
 you have but little time to read it. I bless the Lord you were 
 carried comfortably through your labours yesterday. It is a 
 mercy to have the Lord's blessing, even in a small way ; to be 
 quite assured that His presence is with us, though all the 
 world should be against us. It is a narrow road the followers 
 
LETTERS TO HER SOX. 367 
 
 of Christ walk ; but it is the foothpath He Himself travelled, 
 and it is a great honour put upon a follower of Him, to tread 
 in the same. In all my helplessness, I lean upon Him. I 
 must not detain you, though my heart is full." 
 
 " E has been unwell. What frail bodies we carry 
 
 about with us for a season ! and bless God, it is but for a 
 season, and a short one, when, if in Christ, all will be, must be, 
 
 well in the end I constantly repair to my stronghold 
 
 on your behalf. There is none like Jesus, the once despised 
 Nazarene, who trod this earth in loneliness and poverty, 
 despised and rejected of men. Oh, to walk as He walked, 
 waiting, as He patiently waited, for the crown of glory pre- 
 pared for all who follow in His blessed footsteps ! The 
 honours of this poor world are not worth a thought. May the 
 Lord keep you more than merely satisfied ; may you always 
 rejoice that He has called you to take up a cross for Him who 
 bore so heavy a one for you, tliat you may hereafter, in a little 
 while wear a crown. I am increasingly feeble. Old age is 
 infancy again. Who would live alway ? Oh, for the eye of 
 faith to look within the vail, and see Jesus there, in full 
 possession of His kingdom, waiting to welcome every weary 
 pilgrim home with, Come, ye blessed of my Father ! Humanly 
 speaking, I think this will be my last summer on earth. Well, 
 be it so ; the Lord knows the best time, and He will take care 
 of His own. Do not let ' Octavius, jun.,' forget grand- 
 mamma." 
 
 Soon after the letters were penned from which the above 
 extracts are made, and while still on a visit to her son in town, 
 she was seized with an illness which filled her family with the 
 greatest alarm. Her advanced age and enfeebled constitution, 
 combined with the severitj^ of the attack, left but faint hope of 
 her rallying. It were needless to say, that the most skilful 
 medical aid that London could afford was obtained, the respon- 
 sibility being too great for a near relative to sustain. It was 
 an especial and signal kindness of God's providence, that the 
 physician thus summoned to her couch should be the late 
 Dr. GoLDiNG Bird, of Russell-square. Never, perhaps, did 
 two individuals meet in the relation of patient and physician, 
 between whom, in some of the finest points of natural, as in 
 many of the higher features of Christian character, there ex- 
 isted a closer resemblance, or a stronger sympathy. They 
 met, 
 
 6-' 
 
368 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 "New as if come from other spheres, 
 Yet welcome as if loved for years." 
 
 Until then they were entirely unknown to each other. In a 
 short time, however, they discerned that a powerful and 
 responsive sympathy existed between them ; that, taught by 
 the same Spirit, their hearts fashioned alike by the same 
 Divine hand, they were " no more strangers, but fellow-citizens 
 with the saints, and of the household of God." The tender 
 interest with which Dr. Golding Bird became at once inspired 
 in his venerable patient — the anxiety, skill, and gentleness, 
 with which he watched her case — could not have been sur- 
 passed by the devotion of the oldest friend, or the tenderness 
 of the fondest son. It was a touching spectacle, — and it would 
 have formed a fine study for the pencil, — which met the eye 
 of the writer, on his return from Switzerland (from whence he 
 had been summoned by the illness of his parent,) when for the 
 first time, he saw Dr. Golding Bird. On entering the room, 
 Mrs, Winslow was seated on a sofa, then convalescent, her 
 beloved physician at her side. His pale, intellectual counte- 
 nance was bent over her with an expression of the profoundest 
 interest and veneration, while she was expatiating with her 
 wonted energy and earnestness on her favourite themes — the 
 preciousness of the Saviour, and the glorious hope of the 
 Christian beyond the tomb. The grateful and affectionate 
 regard which the recovered patient cherished for the Christian 
 physician — himself then battling Avith an insidious and rapidly- 
 ripening disease — ^by whose skill and care, under God, her 
 invaluable life had been reclaimed as from the grave, found 
 expression in the following letters addressed to Dr. Bird : — 
 
 '•39, Upper Bedford-place, Sept. 24, 1853. 
 
 "To THE Beloved Physician. 
 "Dear Brother in Jesus, — 
 
 "How can I sufficiently thank you for all your 
 Christian kindness, tenderness, and love to a stranger, to -whom 
 you came in an hour of suffering ? I am convinced the Lord 
 sent you ; and may the life He has spared be increasingly de- 
 voted to Him, and may the sweetest, richest blessing rest upon 
 you. Inasmuch., says our Lord, as ye have dons it unto one of 
 the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto Me, It is one 
 of the strongest evidences of our adoption, the love which the 
 
LETTERS TO A BELOVED PHYSICLVX. 369 
 
 Spirit creates, and which cements and binds together the one 
 family of God. By this we know our election of God, and 
 that we have passed from death unto life. I am leaving town, 
 but could not go without one word to you, as we may not meet 
 again until we meet above. And oh, the meeting then! 
 What will it be ? We shall behold that same Jesus who trod 
 this lower world, now enthroned in glory, as full of love, ten- 
 derness, and sympathy as ever, saying to us then — to you, 
 beloved brother, and to unworthy me — Enter into the joy of 
 thy Lord ! Oh, for that blessed recognition ! May we have 
 stronger faith to realize our high calling, and to live in more 
 constant intercourse with Jesus here, even amidst all that 
 would fain turn us aside. It must and it will be a fight of 
 faith ; but if, in childlike simplicity, we keep our eye intent 
 upon Jesus, travelling to Him for all we need, we shall be able 
 to go on our way rejoicing. My own dear brother, in the best 
 sense, I must now bid you farewell. I am better than I ever 
 expected to be in this vale of tears. Heaven is my home, my 
 happy home. Where Jesus is, there you and I must be. 
 Again let me thank you for all your kind attentions ; and ever 
 believe me your grateful sister in Jesus." 
 
 "January 9th, 1854. 
 
 " . . . It is in my heart to enclose you a little work, 
 which you may read when resting from your labours on the 
 sofa. To me it has been a rich repast, a sweet morsel for a 
 weary, aged traveller through a wilderness world, which, take 
 it at its best, is nothing else, and God designed that it should 
 be nothing else. But the prospect beyond, oh, how glorious ! 
 A Father's house — a house not made with hands, eternal in 
 the heavens! Dear friend, the Lord sent you to me at a time 
 of suffering. He blessed what you did for me, and I was 
 brought back when I expected soon to be with Him whom my 
 soul loveth, and have done with sin and sorrow for ever. 
 'Not yet,' said the Saviour; 'a little longer trial and conflict 
 in the wilderness.' I have something more to learn of my 
 helplessness and weakness. It is but a little, and we shall pass 
 away; all our sicknesses, trials, and disappointments, are need- 
 ful to fit us for it. I have, through a long-protracted life, 
 waded through much tribulation, and now feel that I have not 
 had one sorrow amiss. The port is almost in view, and how 
 
STO MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 pleasant it looks ! Let me send my Christian love to your 
 dear wife, and believe me most gratefully yours in Jesus." 
 
 "April 18th, 1854. 
 
 " . . . And now we are both nearing day by day, hour 
 by hour, our glorious inheritance. It is all ready for us, and 
 Jesus, whom we both love, because He first loved us, stands 
 prepared to bid us welcome. Fear not, dear brother; you 
 have a right to the inheritance; it was purchased for you, and 
 the full price paid down, before you had existence, save in the 
 foreknowledge of God. I shall meet you there, and recognize 
 you too. There will be a perfection of knowledge, as of every- 
 thing else. We have been for years pressing on through a 
 wilderness, and now, through the weakness of our faith, we 
 are loth to leave it. But be of good cheer, for it is all true, 
 all real. Our best Friend, He who loved us unto the death, 
 is there, and at times so very near does it seem to me, I can 
 hardly contain the joy that fills my whole soul. Truly, it has 
 not entered into the heart of man to conceive the things that 
 God has prepared for them that love Him. Sometimes He 
 draws the curtain back a little, and gives me a glimpse, and 
 then, overpowered with the sight, I can but weep for joy, — 
 yes, and weep for sin too. Oh, the wondrous love of God in 
 the gift of His beloved Son, to suffer, bleed, and die for such 
 poor, wretched sinners ! Only believe. I have had such a 
 view this morning of the glory that awaits the believer, that 
 I could not bear much more. I write now to encourage you 
 in the conflict. I may be there to bid you welcome. Who 
 can tell ? The Lord sent you to my bedside, as His messenger, 
 to bring me back again to earth, to see the conversion of 
 several of my grandchildren, in answer to my many prayers, 
 and also to witness, even in this poor world of sorrow, some 
 glimpses of the glory that awaits the believer. When Stephen 
 was dying, the curtain of heaven was drawn, and he saw 
 Jesus standing ready to receive him. He is the very same 
 now, — the same yesterday^ to-day, and for ever. I will not, dear 
 friend, trouble you longer, but will ask the Lord to bless 
 you, to encourage your heart, to comfort your dear wife, and 
 to prepare all you love to follow you into the land of glory. 
 Oh, to spend eternity together with all we have loved on earth ! 
 That glory shall be increasing through the countless ages of an 
 endless existence." 
 
LETTERS TO A BELOVED PHYSICIAN. 371 
 
 The warm response which these utterances awoke, was 
 worthy of him on whose Christian heart they fell Hke the soft 
 breath of evening on the sweet ^olian. The finest chords of 
 his gentle nature were touched, and trembled with holy ecstasy.* 
 A brief note, penned from his couch of languor, survives to 
 complete and close the record of a friendship too sacred and 
 too brief for earth: — 
 
 "48, Russell-square, Feb. 3rd, 1854. 
 
 " I must, my dear Mrs. Winslow, write a few lines to you, 
 to thank you gratefully for your last kind letter. I cherish all 
 your letters, but the last was very genial and comforting to me. 
 It came just as I began to feel again the pressure of the burden 
 of my work on my feeble frame ; and although I have not been 
 quite laid aside, I have been obliged to limit myself to my 
 home practice, so as to rest for the other part of the day. It 
 was comforting to be reminded by you, who had so long tasted 
 that the Lord is gracious, that we should go to Him even with 
 our small cares, as without Him we could do nothing. I fear 
 I have too much reason often to say, with the trembling sup- 
 pliant of old, ' Lord, I believe ; help Thou my unbelief T My 
 dear wife, who deeply enjoyed your letter — for we regard it 
 as common property — desires to unite Avith me in earnest 
 prayers for your preservation during the perils of the winter, 
 and that you may yet long be spared as an example of one 
 who in this world is enabled, by grace, to live in the land of 
 Beulah. 
 
 "Do give my affectionate regards to Miss W , and your 
 
 dear son O , and 
 
 "BeHeve me to remain, ever your friend, 
 
 "GoLDiNG Bird." 
 
 " To Mrs. Winslow." 
 
 "I shall never forget," adds one who survives to mourn, as 
 none others can, his irreparable loss — " I shall never forget his 
 reading the last letter sent. Tears of joy fell from his eyes at 
 the sweet mention of that dear Saviour whom he so loved. 
 His love for your dear parent amounted to a kind of reverence." 
 Religion mourned the loss of one of her brightest ornaments, 
 
 * ** His fine toaed heart, like the harp of the winds, 
 Answers in sweetness each breeze that sings ; 
 And the storms of grief, and the breath of joy, 
 Draw nothing but music from its strings." 
 
372 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 and science one of her noblest sons, when Dr. Golding Bird 
 was numbered with the dead. Seldom have more brilliant 
 powers or brighter hopes become suddenly quenched in the 
 darkness of the sepulchre, than when this accomplished scholar 
 and eminent physician succumbed to the power of a disease 
 accelerated, if not caused, by his extreme devotion to his pro- 
 fession, on the loftiest summit of which he stood when death's 
 dart laid him low. But distinguished as were his talents, and 
 successful as was his career, the highest encomium of Dr. 
 Golding Bird is, — that he was a believer in the Lord Jesus 
 Christ. Nature made him great. Providence made him useful, 
 religion made him good ; and nature. Providence, and grace, 
 unite to accomplish the purposes of Him " who is wonderful in 
 counsel, and excellent in working." The grace of God was 
 "exceeding abundant" in him. He was not "ashamed of 
 Christ and of His words," but everywhere, and on all oc- 
 casions, — whether lecturing from the chair of the professor, or 
 administering in the sick room of the patient, — he invariably 
 exhibited the character, maintained the dignity, and exerted 
 the influence, of the — Christian Physician.* 
 
 It was soon after her recovery from the- illness just referred 
 
 * " On one point,'' remarks the elegant pen of his biographer, " he 
 entertained a strong opinion, regarding it an unpardonable fault, to 
 delude the dying patient with false hopes, when all earthly means of 
 relief had failed, and death remained inevitable. Whilst rational hope 
 existed, he encouraged it ; but when it was shut out for ever, he always 
 told the truth. He spoke emphatically on this subject some j^ears ago, 
 when called by a late eminent member of his profession to the bedside 
 of a dying physician. He was assured that their suffering brother did 
 not know his danger, and had not been told of it. ' Then be it my task,' 
 was the reply, ' to tell him. If we cannot preserve his life here, we 
 must not let him hazard life hereafter.' . . He had always pursued his 
 profession under the conviction that the spiritual and practical physician 
 was inseparable : that between tliem a kindred tie existed, a union often 
 to be usefully emploj'ed, and which it was an important duty to preserve 
 and strengthen. By him it was never broken. At the risk of being 
 deemed sometimes intrusive, he never failed, when he felt that it was 
 necessary, to direct the attention of the dying to that reliance on the 
 Divine sacrifice which, when liis own voice was hushed in the silence of 
 death, and his worn-out and suffering body was at rest, graced his thin 
 features with a smile of tranquillity and peace.^'- -Biographical Notice 
 of the late Dr. Golding Bird, A.M., M D.. F.R.S.. F.L.S. 
 
 While thus touching upon the union of the medical profession with 
 Christianity — the connexion of science with religion— as illustrated by 
 the life of Dr. Golding Bird, it may not be inappropri ite to quote some 
 observations, yet further and more ably elucidating this important and 
 
LETTERS ON HER RECOVERY. 373 
 
 to, that the following letters were penned, the elevated, 
 heavenly tone of which would alone indicate that she had 
 been so near to her eternal home as to have gazed within the 
 
 interesting question, by Dr. Forbes Wixslow. the youngest son of the 
 subject of this Memoir. The extract is taken from a volume, entitled 
 '• Lettsomian Lectures on Insanity, by Porbes Winslow, M.D., D.C.L., 
 1856." 
 
 When speaking of the psychological vocation of the physician. Dr. 
 Forbes Winslow observes: — "I claim for the cultivators of medical 
 science higher and more e.xalted functions than those usually assigned 
 to the physician. We form but a low and grovelling estimate of the 
 high destination, and of the solemn duties of our dignified vocation, if 
 we conceive, that the operations of the physician are limited to the 
 successful application of mere physical agents. The physician is daily 
 called to witness the powerful eflect of mental influences and moral 
 emotions upon the material organization. He perceives that such causes 
 engender disease, destroy life, retard recovery, and often interfere with 
 the successful nctioni of the most potent remedial means exhibited for the 
 alleviation and cure of bodily disease and suffering. Although such in- 
 fluences are admitted to play an important part, either for good or evil, 
 T do not conceive that the practitioners of medicine have had a sufficient 
 appreciation of their great importance. The physician is often called 
 upon, in the exercise of his responsible duties, to discharge medico- 
 theological functions. It is occasionally his painful duty to sit by the 
 couch of the dying, and witness the last sad conflict between mind and 
 matter. It is on such occasions that he lias, either in co-operation with 
 the recognised minister, or in his temporary absence, an opportunity of 
 whispering words of comfort, hope and consolation to the wounded spirit, 
 and of directing the attention of the patient, and those immediately about 
 him. to the only true and legitimate .source of the Christian's hope. Let 
 the physician not lightly esteem or neglect the solemn functions thus 
 imposed upon him. 
 
 " Our position as medical philosophers, occupied in the investigation 
 of the phenomena of life, of mind, and of disease, entails upon us anxious, 
 solemn, and responsible duties. In the hour of pain, wh.en the spirit is 
 humbled by suftering— in the day of distress -in the solemn moment of 
 dissolution —it is our high and noble privilege, like guardian ang'els, to 
 hover about the couch of the sick and dying. We enter the chamber of 
 the man writhing v/ith agony, bereft, perhaps, of that which alone made 
 existence plea-curable, the right exercise of tlie mental powers, and 
 loud and aftcctionate demands are made upon our sagacity and skill. 
 Life -the silken thread,— the fragile chord of life— depends upon our 
 rapid appreciation of the phenomena of disease, and read}^ administration 
 of remedial agents for their relief and cure. Our profession is a noble 
 one — a most dignified, exalted, and honourable calling While feeling 
 that the best of our works are imperfect, and tliat we must rely for our 
 future happiness upon the mercy of God, in Christ Jesus, and not upon 
 our own merits. I cannot be forgetful how great is our responsibility, 
 for the rig4it use of our talents, and the faithful discharge of our solemn 
 and anxious duties." 
 
374 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 vail, and to have felt and heard what it was not possible 
 fully tc utter. 
 
 TO MRS. c- 
 
 " My DEAR Friend, — Nov. 25th, 1853. 
 
 " I have often thought of you, and have inquired of 
 those who knew, how you were. But when we get above, 
 we shall not have far to seek each other. Oh, that^ not this, is 
 our home ! Here all is tainted, defiled with sin ; God has 
 something better in store for us. Make your calling and elec- 
 tion sure for that better land. I go to prepare a place for you. 
 I have lately been brought by severe illness almost in view of 
 my glorious inheritance. My children were weeping around 
 me, and all thought my time was come, I felt quite ready. 
 In a few moments I expected to be in the presence of Him 
 my soul loved. But it was not to be so ; and here I am still 
 in this vale of tears, kept for a season out of my eternal in- 
 heritance, and, for some wise and gracious purpose, have been 
 wonderfully raised up again. The will of the Lord be done. 
 And now, my dear friend, I feel I must live more than ever 
 upon Jesus. He is alone able to counsel, direct, and overrule 
 all our concerns, and in the best possible way. Why, then, 
 should you and I be over anxious about any one thing, when 
 w^e can cast all our cares upon Him ? Oh, it is sweet living 
 when we thus live upon Jesus ! Go often and talk with 
 Christ, and tell Him all you feel and desire. The smaller the 
 case you take to Him, the more 3^ou honour Him ! for in this 
 act you acknowledge your belief in what He says that. Without 
 
 me ye can do nothing. I am with , and greatly enjoy his 
 
 ministry. When he was an infant I fed him, and now in my 
 old age he is permitted to feed me with the sincere milk of the 
 word, which is very sweet and refreshing to my waiting soul. 
 The Lord Jesus draw you nearer and yet nearer to Himself, 
 and make Himself more sensibly known to you. Do not lose 
 siglit of Him ; He is your Helper in this vale of tears, and has 
 promised that He will never leave nor forsake you. And oh, 
 to see Him in all his glory above, and be acknowledged there, 
 in the midst of all the host of heaven, as His beloved, this is 
 worth living and is worth dying for ! In a little moment, and 
 eternity will burst upon our view. Lean upon Jesus for every- 
 thing, and you will find you cannot do without Him here or 
 hereafter." 
 
LETTERS OX HER RECOVERY. 375 
 
 TO MRS. C. . 
 
 "... Since I last heard from you, I have been brought 
 almost in full view of my eternal home. My physician gave 
 
 me up, and my children, who were all about me but dearO , 
 
 who was abroad for his health, were expecting my departure. 
 But the Lord said, ' Not yet ; ' and so I was raised up, and 
 brought back to suffer a little more of earth's trials. I felt 
 peaceful and satisfied that I was safe. There was not that re- 
 joicing that I sometimes have had, but a calm, trusting, con- 
 fiding state of mind ; not the shadow of a doubt, nor a cloud 
 between my soul and Him whom my soul loveth. Oh, dear 
 friend, let us often meditate on heaven ; it will assist us to bear 
 more serenely the ills of life. Our Jesus is there, the self-same 
 Jesus who dwelt in the flesh. Was it not sweet and lovely in 
 Him to lead His disciples out to the spot from whence he as- 
 cended to glory, in order that they might see that the identically 
 same body He had borne about with Him on earth. He bore 
 up with Him to heaven ? I am quite sure that if we dwelt 
 more in all godly simplicity in the full expectation of seeing 
 and being with Jesus for ever, we should be found oftener re- 
 joicing in the prospect before us. Have, my dear friend, 
 constant transactions with this precious Saviour. A holy 
 famiharity with Him will tend much to conform us to His 
 likeness. But few go to Jesus just as they are, and with no price 
 in their hand. A poor, needy sinner, empty and helpless as a 
 babe, is inconceivably welcome to Christ. From such He will 
 never, no never, turn away. This simple, believing living upon 
 Christ has a most sanctifying, purifying tendency upon the 
 whole inner man ; and thus sin grows more hateful, and the 
 world less attractive, and the pleasures of sense increasingly 
 distasteful, and we are better fitted to sustain the trials of life. 
 I must now conclude, but my heart is so full of this glorious 
 theme, that, were it possible, I could proclaim to the whole 
 world the willingness there is in the heart of Jesus to receive 
 and save sinners, as sinners^ and not as saints. Let me hear 
 from you." 
 
 How often in the Christian's deepening experience are old 
 and long-familiar truths brought to the soul with all the 
 power, and clothed with all the freshness and beauty, of a 
 new revelation ! What an evidence this of the divinity of the 
 Bible, and what a touching unfolding of the love of the Spirit ! 
 
376 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 It is thus she confirms, by her own personal experience, this 
 thought : — 
 
 " Dearest , Sabbath Afternoon. 
 
 " I am still confined to bed, quite unable to exert 
 myself. I have prayed for you again and again, many times 
 to-day. Oh, what a mighty privilege it is to have to do immed- 
 iately with God, with God Himself, the mighty God in Christ ! 
 How could we have known anything of God, had He not 
 stooped to reveal Himself in Jesus ? I have been thinking 
 much to-day of this wondrous stoop. It has opened in my 
 mind a new spring of thought, has given me a fresh view of 
 God, to an extent I have never had before. For, although I 
 have often read and spoken of God reveaHng Himself in my 
 nature, yet it has never appeared so vividly true, so blessedly 
 real as to-day. Oh, as I travel on to my heavenly home, and 
 near the time when the vail will be drawn altogether, how 
 increasingly wonderful are the glorious realities of eternity ! 
 wonder upon wonder opening up to the astonished sight, almost 
 overwhelming. Praise our God. What could I do without 
 Jesus ! Old age, with its untold infirmities, would be a serious 
 drag if He were not by me, and had I not the privilege of 
 leaning upon Him with all the weight of care, pain, sin, and 
 sorrow. Again would I say, how inexpressibly precious the 
 incarnation of the Son of God has been to my soul to-day, the 
 Holy Ghost unfolding it in a new light, and giving me to take 
 a more simple, direct hold upon it as a matter- of-fact truth ! I 
 ask you now to help me to praise Him for the depth of love, 
 matchless, wondrous love, it has unfolded to me, and to urge 
 you to preach more and more of God, the mighty God, dwelling 
 in Jesus, in a body like our own. I have been praying that 
 the Holy Ghost may help you to-day, and carry the word 
 home to the hearts of all, that many poor sinners may be 
 brought to the feet of Jesus. It has not been a barren Sab- 
 bath to me, although I have been kept at home. Oh, the 
 goodness of God, the wonders of His matchless love ! Eternity 
 will be only long enough to tell of it. Love to all." 
 
 It was a pleasing interpretation of the design of God in thus 
 turning her back again into the wilderness, after giving her so 
 close and vivid a view of the good land, to the borders of 
 which He seemed to bring her, that she was spared to behold 
 several of her children's children avow her God and Father to 
 
LETTERS TO HER GRANDCHILDREN. 877 
 
 be theirs, — thus permitted to sickle, ere she departed, a "kind 
 of first fruits" of the golden harvest of her long-sown prayers. 
 We have space but for a few extracts only of the many in- 
 structive and encouraging letters her pen addressed to them on 
 this occasion, all breathing much holy joy in their conversion, 
 and godly jealousy for their consistent walk. 
 
 to her grandson, t. e. w . 
 
 "Dearest T , 
 
 "Dearer to me now than ever, since you came into 
 this world of trial and sorrow. The love of Jesus acts as a 
 holy cement, uniting the one family of God to Himself and to 
 each other. Bless the Lord for His great goodness and His 
 tender love to you all, not forgetting the dear departed one, 
 the father of you all. So eternal and deep, so sovereign and 
 boundless is the love of God, angels cannot fathom it. And I 
 believe that a sigh, sincere and deep, coming from the chief of 
 sinners, even at a dying hour, the loving, sympathising heart 
 of Jesus could not resist it. Oh, the wondrous love of God in 
 giving us such a Saviour, able to save to the uttermost all who 
 feel their need of Him ! Now is the Lord answering my ten 
 thousand poor prayers, and these, I think, when I was so near 
 my happy home, almost in sight. He brought me back to see. 
 Oh, He is a God who loves to answer prayer, and is faithful 
 to His every word ! You cannot ask too much of Him. The 
 more you ask, the better is He pleased. Go with large de- 
 mands. Ask anything in My name^ and I will do it. Ask, that 
 
 your joy might he full. We heard from W , who gives as 
 
 a reason for not writing sooner, that they had set apart one 
 
 evening in the week, H S and himself, for reading 
 
 the Bible and for prayer. A young man whom they have 
 met in the University, and who is a dear Christian, and ad- 
 vanced in the ways of God, has joined them, and is a great 
 acquisition. My love to your wife. Oh, that we might be a 
 whole family in heaven ! " 
 
 TO HER GRAND-DAUGHTER S- 
 
 " No one can tell how my soul rejoiceth over you, my be- 
 loved cliild. Now do I see why the Lord brought me back 
 to earth ; it was to cause me to see the answer, before I left, 
 of my poor prayers. And now I shall hope to meet and dwell 
 with you throughout a blessed eternity, and many more so 
 
378 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW, 
 
 dear to us both. How grateful I am to Him for all His abun- 
 dant goodness and tender mercy to us as a family ! God be 
 praised. My heart has been melted in love to-day to Him, 
 who is all over and all within, nothing but love unfeigned, 
 constant, and unabating, to the weakest, the most unworthy of 
 all His little flock. And now let me urge you to live upon 
 Him as a young child, going to Him for all you want and 
 with all you fear. You will find Him ready to respond to 
 your request by the still small voice of His Spirit. Hear me, 
 O Lord, when I cry luitli my voice : have mercy also upon me, 
 and answer me. Psalm xxvii. 7. Oh, that He may go on in 
 His own loving way until all we love are horn again, and set 
 out on their heavenly race to the land of glory ! " 
 
 " Oh, how my heart rejoices over you, my beloved child, 
 doubly dear to me now ! Oh, the mercy of mercies, to be be- 
 loved of Christ ! The Lord has at last condescended to bow 
 the heavens, and listen to my ten thousand prayers for you all. 
 May the great and mighty work go on among the others still 
 to be called into the kingdom ! Oh, the wondrous power of 
 prayer when we come in the name of Jesus, God's dear and 
 beloved Son ! My heart is brimful of joy on your account and 
 dear Octavia's. I wish you would both come and see me. 
 The Lord has raised me up from the borders of the grave, to 
 see the fruit of my prayers. I wondered what I was spared 
 for, but I see it now. Keep an open heart with Jesus. Re- 
 member He is bone of your bone, and flesh of your flesh. He 
 can enter into all your fears and hopes, desires and difficulties. 
 Having once been in the body. He knows how to pity and to 
 succour you, and to be a present help in time of need. Thank 
 dear E for her kind letter, giving me such precious news.'' 
 
 "I bless God, dear child, often on your behalf; but now 
 remember, you have but just begun to run the race — a race 
 for a crown of glory. So run that you may ohtain. Many 
 I have seen set out well in this race, but I have lived to see 
 them fall short at last of the prize. They forsook their first 
 love, and sought their enjoyment in the poor wretched trifles 
 of time and sense. May it not be so with you, darling child. 
 Keep close to Jesus. How do I pray for you and for dear Oc- 
 tavia too, and for all those who have truly set out on their heaven- 
 ly journey ! You are in a world full of temptation. Satan, the 
 foe of Christ and the enemy of souls, goeth about to draw 
 aM%iy Christ's lambs from closely following their Shepherd. 
 
LETTERS TO RER GRANDCHILDREN. 379 
 
 He has a thousand ways to alkire and entrap them to do and 
 say that which will grieve the Spirit, and dishonour the Saviour. 
 He will say to you, ' This is no sin, and that is no sin ; other 
 Christians do it, and why may not you ?' And what can you 
 do, thus assailed by the arch enemy? You have no more 
 self-power to resist him than an infant has over an elephant. 
 But Jesus, who loves you, and has all power in heaven and on 
 earth, invites you to come to Him, and be saved from all your 
 enemies, from the power of Satan, and from the evil that is in 
 the world, and from the corrupt tendencies of your own sinful 
 nature. And although you are now saved, and your name is 
 written in the Lamb's book of life, yet you are still in the body, 
 and have daily and hourly to contend with the world, the 
 flesh, and Satan. And Satan is sure to find a hidden foe in 
 your heart, ready to betray you into his power. And what 
 can a feeble child do in such a case, but run at once to Jesus ? 
 Be where you may, in company, in the street, or at home, lift 
 up your heart to Jesus for aid, and He will prove a present 
 help in your time of need. He listens to the feeblest breath- 
 ings of the heart. He requires not the voice ; a wish, a faint 
 desire, will be all-sufficient. Wherever you are, there is Jesus. 
 And may the Holy Ghost w^rite upon your heart the precept. 
 Grieve not the Holy Spirit^ ivherehy you are sealed unto the day 
 of redemption. One wrong step in the early part of your 
 Christianity may lead to an eventual going back far to the 
 world. Remember, you are commanded to come out of the 
 world, and to touch not the unclean thing. I wish you to be 
 much in the study of the Bible, before you unite yourself with 
 any particular church. See what your Lord says as respects 
 the ordinances of His house, for it is most important that we 
 walk in the right ways of the Lord ; this you can do, and still, 
 if you prefer it, attend the ministry of Mr. Jarman." 
 
 " Go nowhere where you cannot take Christ with you. 
 Put your hand, as it were, in His hand, and whatever you do, 
 let your whole aim be to please Him, who suffered, bled, and 
 died that you might live for Him, and with Him for ever. 
 Let me hear often from you. It is but a little while that I 
 
 shall be here. Pray for dear H and P . Encourage 
 
 dear S and H in maintaining the worship of the Lord 
 
 in the family. Make it a point to take the younger children in 
 to hear God's word and to pray. May the Lord bless you, my 
 own beloved child, make you useful, and keep you near to 
 
380 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 Himself. Let darling Octavia read this ; it is for you both. 
 Pray, pray, pray without ceasing. God listens to your faintest 
 breathing. Oh, the marvellous potency of prayer, when we 
 
 plead the name of Jesus ! Thank dear E for her precious 
 
 letter; but you must not any of you cross your letters, as I 
 cannot make it all out, and then I am cross too !" 
 
 A name occurs in one of the preceding extracts which it 
 may be proper, in this part of the Memoir, to introduce. It 
 was her privilege, during her visits to town, and as the close 
 of life drew on, to wait occasionally on the ministry of the late 
 Rev. David Fenton Jarman, incumbent of Bedford Episcopal 
 Chapel, Bloomsbury. It was just the character of ministration 
 that her soul needed to nourish and strengthen it for its pas- 
 sage over Jordan. Often would she repair to his sanctuary 
 when scarcely able to walk from the carriage to the pew, and 
 when more than once compelled to retire, from faintness, before 
 the service closed, and as frequently has she returned refreshed 
 by, and rejoicing in, the glorious truths that had fallen with so 
 much power from the lips of this honoured servant of Christ. 
 Grateful for the souMielp thus derived, and sympathizing with 
 the impaired health from which he was a constant sufferer, she 
 would occasionally visit his apartment adjoining the chapel, 
 and seek to cheer and strengthen his lone and depressed heart. 
 But not to her only were the labours of Mr. Jarman blest. It 
 pleased God to own his ministry, in the conversion of several 
 members of her family ; and this circumstance was well calcu- 
 lated to deepen her affectionate and prayerful interest in this 
 tried minister, and draw yet closer the bond that linked in 
 holy fellowship two kindred spirits destined so soon to meet 
 together before the throne of God and of the Lamb. We 
 venture upon a few extracts of the correspondence which 
 resulted from this hallow^ed friendship. It is thus she seeks 
 to convey the richest comfort that an earnest, faithful minister 
 of Christ can possibly desire or receive : — 
 
 TO THE REV. D. F. JARMAN. 
 
 " My DEAR Brother in Jesus, — Leamington, Dec. 13th. 
 
 " Youvrill rejoice, I am sure, to hear that the Lord 
 has made your ministry a blessing to several of my very dear 
 grandchildren, and thus has answered my ten thousand prayers 
 for them. They have sought and found Christ precious to 
 their souls, and are going on their way rejoicing. Thus you 
 
LETTER TO THE REV. D. F. JARMAN. 381 
 
 see, beloved brother, you are not labouring in vain for the 
 Lord ; for, although these dear ones have heard and known 
 the gospel as from infancy, yet the seed has laid dormant until 
 now, and God has blessed your ministry to the enkindling of a 
 flame of holy love to the precious Saviour of sinners in their 
 hearts. I could not refrain from tellmg you this. Since I saw 
 you I have been very near to the kingdom of glory, but the 
 Lord has detained me here a httle longer. Yes, it is but a 
 little while, and we pass away to better things prepared for 
 us, and then you will hear the words. Well done^ good and 
 faithful servant ; enter into the joy of your Lord. God be 
 praised that this is not our rest ; better things are prepared for 
 us. He will make amends for all your sorest trials and dis- 
 comforts. Oh, to be there ! 
 
 " Many thanks, dear brother, for your kind note of yester- 
 day. How unspeakably sweet is that love which unites the 
 members of the one body — Jesus Himself the Head ! Ye are all 
 one in Christ Jesus. This love is one of the strongest evidences 
 of our adoption, and one of the most sweet unfoldings of our 
 spiritual life. Christ has but one church, but one spouse — all 
 born of one Spirit, and by that self-same Spirit educating for 
 the place Jesus has gone to prepare. Is not this a blessed 
 thought ? I seem to stand upon the margin, ready to pass 
 over; and, standing where I do, can affirm that all is true, 
 gloriously true. Oh, the thought of reahzing the whole truth ! 
 Dear brother, this life of sickness and suffering is worth ten 
 thousand worlds, for it brings us to live more as helpless children 
 on God, and more readily to realize the world to come. Be 
 of good cheer, and work on ; the more you are made to feel 
 your weakness, the more welcome are you to Christ." 
 
 " Ever varyin^g are the dealings of our God, but they are all 
 in wisdom and in love. He knows the windings and the wants 
 of our immortal souls, and so fits His dispensations as to ac- 
 complish the great work to be carried on there. Oh, it is a 
 great work, for it is to glorify a great King ! Had we our 
 way, how should we mar this work ; and yet how often are we 
 tempted to dictate to Him who is so skilfully carrying it on ! 
 Deeply do I feel for you. You love your work; and yet the 
 Lord, who loves you better than you love yourself, is laying 
 you aside from it. Oh, could we but take a glimpse within the 
 vail, we should see how intent the eye of Jesus was upon the 
 progress of His own mighty work in our souls ; and in the 
 
382 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 midst of the many infirmities of body from which you suffer, 
 you would see that even in that state what great things He 
 was accompHshing in and by you ! You are now in the fur- 
 nace, but Christ is with you. But I know something of the 
 working of the heart, the sighs, the regrets, perhaps the repin- 
 ings, and the ten thousand drawbacks springing out of the 
 flesh ; and Satan making the most of them to cause us to 
 murmur, and vainly to suppose that we could manage better 
 for ourselves. But, beloved, though you know all these things, 
 you will not be offended with an old warrior, who has had a 
 thousand battles with this arch foe, and should have fallen a 
 prey to his devices, had not Jesus interposed His shield, and 
 quenched the fiery darts. ' Does God love me ? Is He my 
 reconciled Father? If so, why these aflQictions, why these 
 temptations ?' Thus is the believer often tempted to reason. 
 Thus have I been tried, and thus too have argued. But now 
 that I am hastening to my happy home, I can look back and 
 testify to you and to others, that the trial of your faith is much 
 more precious than gold, though it he tried with fire. Jesus was 
 a tried stone, the apostles were tried men, — as soon as a sinner 
 is born of the Spirit, he enters uj^on a school of trial, and this 
 is the path to the kingdom." 
 
 The following is the last letter she penned to this beloved 
 and afflicted minister of the Lord Jesus, written at the com- 
 mencement of her final illness, and dated as from the confines 
 of glory. 
 
 " My dear brother in Jesus, I am ill, preparing to obey the 
 summons, 'Come up hither.' And oh, how blessed is the 
 prospect ! Eternal love ! eternal glory ! To be ever with the 
 Lord, basking in the sunshine of his blessed countenance ! I 
 shall be there to welcome you home. Take courage, dear 
 brother, for it is all true and all glorious. The more I am 
 enabled to realize the mission of Jesus to this lower world, the 
 more my whole soul is filled with joy and hope. / know the 
 thoughts that I thiyik toiuards you, saith the Lord ! thoughts of 
 -peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end. Reading this 
 passage to-day filled my heart with a blessed conviction that, 
 both in the Old and in the New Testaments, Jesus was the 
 speaker, and that what He was then He is now. Be of good 
 courage, dear brother; we shall surely see Him and dwell 
 with Him for ever and ever. Amen and Amen." 
 
 How soon was this blessed hope realized ! A few brief 
 
LETTER TO THE REV. D. F. JARMAN. 383 
 
 months of increased suffering intervened, and Mr. Jarman 
 finished his course, and went to join her glorified spirit before the 
 throne. She had preceded him, as she desired, and was there 
 to * w^elcome him liome.' And now that he is gone, it may 
 not be inappropriate to embody in this work a brief quotation 
 from a letter, the publication of which, Avhile he lived, might 
 liave grieved the lowliness of his affectionate spirit. In for- 
 Avarding her Correspondence, Mr. Jarman thus remarks : — 
 
 ". . . . Not only are they highly characteristic of dear 
 Mrs. "Winslow's elevation and spirituality of mind, but, 
 being among her last letters, they exhibit her at her very 
 highest stage of Christian attainment and proximity to heaven. 
 They show, too, how she united practical godliness with the 
 blessed visions of her home and her glorified Saviour. Rapture 
 never made her forgetful of her own daily duties, or the human 
 trials and cares of others. She was never exalted above 
 measure by the abundance of the revelation given unto her ; 
 but you cannot help observing that she constantly employs, in 
 her letters, these bright visions of Christ which she enjoyed to 
 the enforcement of greater activity and patience in the believer's 
 warfare. To have known a spirit Avho could pen such words 
 and such truths, is one of the greatest privileges of my life. 
 I feel it has done me good. I trust it has drawn me much 
 nearer to God. I believe it has elevated my faith, and in- 
 troduced me to clearer views of my rest and of my glorified 
 Saviour. I never shall forget her or her heavenly conversation. 
 In my case, the influence of acquaintance was not the only one 
 she produced on me. Most powerfully did I feel attracted 
 towards her even in our first interview, and before any letters 
 had passed between us. I think, and I believe I may say, that 
 attraction ripened into the deepest regard on both sides ; and 
 I cannot read the expressions of love and sympathy in her 
 precious letters, without deeply feeling that I have lost a very 
 dear mother in Israel. Oh, that God's Spirit may so sanctify 
 the regard she felt towards me, that it may daily draw me 
 upwards to her, and may give force and power to her kind and 
 invaluable advice ! Oh, that the remembrance of what she 
 was may help to prepare me for beholding, with increased love 
 and closer communion, what she is ! I commit the enclosed to 
 your careful keeping. Do not mislay them in the very per- 
 plexing work of selecting examples of her correspondence for 
 the memoir, for very precious are her w^ords to me, and the 
 
384 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 truths they contain. May God bless your efifort, and make it 
 very useful. 
 
 "Yours, with every expression of regard and sympathy, 
 
 "David Fenton Jarman." 
 
 But her work was not yet finished. Gently led back to 
 earth, as from the gates of the celestial city, she was not only 
 to be the recipient of a new joy enkindled by a work of grace 
 in those so dear to her, but she was still to scatter around her 
 the golden fruit of her rich and matured experience as she 
 passed to her eternal home. We glean a few of the riper 
 ears. 
 
 "Dear-beloved Friend, — Leamington, July 28. 
 
 " How glad was I to see your well-known hand- 
 writing, for it was long since I had either heard of, or from 
 you! Think you that all this time I could forget you? Oh 
 no, dear, dear friend ; the remembrance of you is as dear as 
 ever; and we shall meet above in our Father's house. And, 
 oh, that meeting ! to be always together, and to go no more 
 out for ever. Cheer up, Jesus is there, your Jesus and mine. 
 And, next to Him, I may be ready to bid you welcome. He 
 is risen from the dead, and He will raise our dead bodies, and, 
 vile and troublesome as they now are, yet shall they be re- 
 newed like unto His glorious body, and we shall be ever with 
 the Lord. I have been a great sufferer for a long time, and, 
 in my eighty-first year, it is hard to bear. And yet Jesus 
 sweetens every care, and His kindness, oh, how great ! He 
 has favoured me at times with such glimpses of the glory that 
 is round about the great white throne, on which He is seated, 
 that it seems as if I could not have much more w^hile in the 
 
 flesh. Help me to praise Him And now, my dear 
 
 friend, I feel my strength failing, and must lay down my pen. 
 Tender love to your dear sister, and to dear Mr. P — — . I 
 cannot tell you how dear you are to me. Can I ever forget 
 you, on earth or in heaven ? No, never, never. May the 
 Lord bless you with much of His spirit. One word on the 
 blessed manifestation of Jesus to our longing souls. Let us 
 never be satisfied Avithout this precious recognition. I meet 
 with many professing Christians who appear to know nothing 
 about it, and therefore know not what it is to rejoice with joy 
 unspeakable and full of glory. But I seem as if I could not 
 stop. I will meet you above. I do so love you." 
 
ON CLOSENESS OF SPIRITUAL WALK. 385 
 
 TO MISS A . ON CLOSENESS OF SPIRITUAL WALK. 
 
 " My dear YOUNG Friend, — Leamington, June 9. 
 
 " Many thanks for your kind letters, which I have 
 been too ill to answer. Through much tender mercy, the 
 Lord has again raised me from a bed of severe suffering ; and 
 may this painful dispensation be abundantly sanctified to the 
 soul. There was a needs-be for it all. The Lord does not 
 willingly afflict the children of men, but for their profit. This 
 is designed to be the place where God's children are disciplined 
 for their bright and better home above. And, oh, dear friend, 
 what must be that place which infinite love and power are 
 preparing for us, unworthy though we are ! Oh, the boundless 
 love of Jesus, our own Jesus, who lived and sufi'ered, died and 
 rose triumphant from the grave, and is now seated on His 
 throne, ready to receive every poor, needy sinner that comes 
 to Him for salvation, or for grace to help in time of need ! 
 This is the precious Friend I would recommend. Remember, 
 you are not coming to a stranger. When you come to Jesus, 
 you come to one who is bone of your bone, and flesh of your 
 flesh. Be not afraid of taking all your concerns to Him, how- 
 ever trifling they may be. He has an ear to listen to the 
 feeblest request you have to make. You cannot go to God, 
 the mighty God, but in Christ, the man Christ Jesus. Now, 
 this is the Jesus whose ear listens to our smallest requests; 
 and when we carry them to Him, we the more honour Him, 
 seeing that we believe what He affirms to be true — Without 
 me ye can do nothing. Dear friend, let us all agree to live more 
 decidedly for a glorious eternity. We are here but for a little 
 while and then we pass away. Live more upon Him. Do 
 not walk at a distance. The more you go to Him, tlie better 
 you will become acquainted with Him, and feel you really 
 cannot do without Him. Hold fast your oneness. You are 
 a partaker of His nature, and He of yours, sin only excepted. 
 Make sure your calling and election. Keep near to your best 
 Friend, who has heaven and earth at His command. A crown 
 of glory awaits the poor sinner that clings to Jesus. Who 
 would not live, and die too, for a crown of glory ? Oh, let us 
 entreat all we love to cast in their lot with us, and surely 
 we will do them good ! My tender love to your very dear 
 mother and sisters. Ever think of me as one who prays for 
 17 
 
386 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 your best interests, and hopes to meet you in that better world 
 to which we are so rapidly approaching." 
 
 TO MISS M. C , ox THE ILLNESS OF HER SON 0- 
 
 " Beloved Feiend, — Leamington, July 24 
 
 " Unite your prayers with ours for dear , who 
 
 is very ill in Paris. We only heard last evening : and the 
 moment he can be moved, he will be with us, if God so 
 wills it. We are greatly tried. Jesus is now my stronghold. 
 He can heal, and He only." 
 
 " Monday. — By the last accounts, was a shade better. 
 
 Oh, that it may be abundantly sanctified to us all ! An espe- 
 cial prayer-meeting was held on Saturday evening. Major 
 T , who was there, says he never heard more earnest, fer- 
 vent petitions offered up as then. My soul is able to rest in 
 Jesus, and my eye is continually up to Him. Oh, the mercy 
 of having such a Friend in Heaven, who is able to do all we 
 call upon Him for ! They leave Paris for Dover on Tuesday, 
 where we go to meet them." May the Lord bless you for all 
 the tender expressions of your love to me and mine." 
 
 " Wednesday morning. — Oh, what a God we have to do 
 with — so slow to anger, so ready to forgive ! Help me to 
 praise and adore His holy name. I have just had a blessed 
 interview with Him whom my soul loveth, and He will do all 
 things well for me and mine. I did not forget you, and I 
 know he heard me, and listened to all I had to say and to ask 
 at His blessed hands. Oh, there is a needs-be for every trial ! 
 He loves us too well to grieve us ; but we need sharp disci- 
 pline to cause us to know the wondrous love He bears towards 
 us, and in order to bring us to cling closer to Him. No tongue 
 can tell how much I have enjoyed of nearness and holy mani- 
 festation, and endearing intercourse of Jesus, in this late trial. 
 Beloved, we shall have to thank Him through eternity for 
 every sorrow we have had while training us, as it does, for 
 that full enjoyment that awaits us above. This late trial has 
 loosened another peg of my earthly tent, and unfolded to me 
 more of the heart of Him who once on earth was the Man of 
 sorrows and acquainted with grief. And now you w411 be 
 impatient to hear more of our invalid ; but my heart was so 
 brimful of love to Jesus — for that's the name I most love — 
 that I was obliged to lodge a little of its overflowing in your 
 loving bosom before I could come down to the creature, how- 
 
LETTER TO THE REV. E. C. W . 387 
 
 ever dear. Dear is better, and they are preparing to 
 
 leave Paris for Dover. How thankful I am dear E was 
 
 able to nurse him, and he could not have had a better ! " 
 
 " Dover. — I know you will join your praises with mine to the 
 
 Giver of all good, for His great mercy in so far restoring . 
 
 Oh, these frail bodies ! How all these thing should remind us 
 that God has some better thing in store for His chosen, while 
 He constantly says to us, Arise^ my love, my fair one, and come 
 away. And yet how closely do we cling to earth and to 
 earthly creatures. But who would not love Him, whose ear 
 bends down to listen to our requests, saying to us, WJiat is thy 
 petition, and what is thy request f Open thy mouth ivide, and I 
 will fill it. Oh, let us draw largely upon this treasure-house 
 of blessing ! The oftener we come, the more welcome. Why 
 does the Lord try us, but that we may try Him, and prove 
 that he is able and willing to do all that He has promised? 
 We often ask with so much unbehef in our hearts, the wonder 
 is that He condescends to hear or answer us at all. We have 
 met with some dear saints here, richly taught of God. The 
 Lord bless vou." 
 
 TO THE REV. E. C. W- 
 
 " Dear Brother, — Leamington, May 12. 
 
 "For this I beheve you to be. My reason for 
 addressing you now is to acknowledge the receipt of your kind 
 letter to my dear son, who is just hurrying to town, and has 
 not a moment to write. Your letter was a sweet word of 
 encouragement to him, and I promised to drop you a line of 
 thanks on his behalf. Your note was so hke a loving disciple 
 of a loving Saviour. How truly does the Eternal Spirit knit 
 the children of God to each other ! This is one of the most 
 incontestable evidences of their sonship. Although I have not 
 seen you or your dear wife, as soon as I read your letter, my 
 heart went out towards you. The Lord Jesus has but one 
 church, and this is composed of all who are born of the Spirit. 
 They may be scattered up and down through the wilderness, 
 but He knows where to find them, and will make no mistakes. 
 As it respects myself, my pilgrimage may soon terminate, but 
 the prospect brightens as it draws near. It is my wish to 
 encourage all that are journeying to heaven, to get much of 
 Christ in their souls while here, not only for their present 
 comfort, but beheving that, in the same proportion, they will 
 
388 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 enjoy the glory of heaven hereafter. There every vessel will 
 be full ; but the soul enlarged while here will contain the same 
 proportion there. There will be no lack felt, for every vessel 
 will be full. God be praised for the hope, the blessed hope 
 of eternal life beyond a poor dying world. I perceive you are 
 one of his tried ones. It is all right. I have waded through 
 seas of sorrow, but now bless the Lord for all. I do believe 
 He loves us so that He would not lay the weight of a finger 
 upon us, but for some special good, and to bring us to know 
 
 Him better May the Lord heal you, dear Christian 
 
 brother and sister in the Lord. If we do not meet here, we 
 shall above. Let us reahze what awaits us. Oh, help me to 
 praise and adore Him who has given us such a hope, such a 
 blessed hope ! How we will sing in heaven ! Live, dear 
 friends, in anticipation of the glory to come. ... I often think, 
 if anything will make us ashamed in heaven, it will be the 
 recollection of our mibeheving prayers. Oh, for the spirit of 
 prayer, and for the faith of prayer ! This brings heaven down 
 into the soul, and lifts the soul towards heaven. We ought 
 to have to do with Jesus all the day long, and the more we 
 have to do with Him, the more we shall resemble Him." 
 
 TO G. M , ESQ., ON THE LOSS OF HIS CHILD. 
 
 "... I have only within a few moments heard of your loss. 
 May the Lord comfort your heart, and make this affliction a 
 stepping-stone to lift you nearer to Himself, and a little higher 
 towards your heavenly home. This is not our rest, and the 
 Lord causes us to find it so. The Lord, who loves you better 
 than you love yourself, knows how and when to pour the 
 balm of consolation into your soul, saying to you as He once 
 did to me, ' I have done it.' Oh, to live so with God as to 
 listen to the still small voice of His Spirit, responding, ' Speak, 
 Lord, for thy servant heareth ! ' This He often does in His 
 providence, and still oftener when interceding with Him in 
 earnest prayer. Sin, dear brother, threw us at an immense 
 distance from God, but Christ came to bring us back again, 
 and the Spirit is given to draw us sensibly near. May He 
 speak to you in this trying dispensation, and comfort you as 
 mortal cannot. It is inexpressibly delightful to know that in 
 all our tribulations we have access to the ear of God, and His 
 heart, too, is ready to answer. Let not the enemy suggest to 
 your sorrowing heart that the Lord docs not love you, or He 
 
TO A CHRISTIAN FRIEND. 389 
 
 would not chasten you in this waj. The Lord does chasten 
 those whom He loves, and for wise and gracious purposes too. 
 Let us lie passive in His hands, leaving ourselves to be dealt 
 with according to His infinite wisdom and love. Nestle in 
 the bosom of Jesus, and wait until He speaks peace to you. 
 Our dear pastor has arrived safe, and is now with Jesus, and 
 ere long we shall join Him there. Let us, then, live more for 
 eternity, and less for this poor dying Avorld. I know you have 
 your cares ; but if you would carry them simply to Christ, He 
 would make the rough places plain, and the crooked straight. 
 In every difficulty, go at once to Jesus, before you decide in 
 your own mind, or listen to the dictates of your own heart. 
 Seeing you are shut up to God, let this trying dispensation 
 result in a closer fellowship with Him ; for I am persuaded He 
 so loves you, that He would not lay the weight of a feather 
 upon you more than is needful. The love of Jesus passeth all 
 knowledge, here and hereafter. We shall never be able to 
 fathom or come to the end of it. You may know these things 
 better than I ; but when unexpected trial comes, Satan en- 
 deavours to fill the mind with misgivings and doubts about our 
 interest in our best beloved, our dearest Friend in heaven ; 
 and it is for this I venture to send you these few lines." 
 
 TO A CHEISTIAN FRIEND. 
 
 " . . . . Thus has the Lord tried us ; but His goodness has 
 been manifested all through. He has heard and answered 
 prayer again and again ; and I have often thought it was worth 
 a few -trials to experience the blessedness of having constantly 
 to do with One who is so ready to do all we call upon Him 
 for, so able, so willing, so blessedly true to His own word. 
 "We must try the Lord before we can know Him ; but first He 
 must try us, before we will ever try Him. In this way our 
 trust and faith in God is increased, and our souls established in 
 
 the truth. I have written to dear Mrs. W , and I do hope, 
 
 and indeed I do believe, she will have to say this was one of 
 the richest and most fruitful seasons of spiritual blessing of her 
 whole life. The just shall live hy faith. The Lord has now 
 placed her in such a position as to compel her to know more 
 of Himself and more of her own heart, and to put her trust in 
 His faithfulness to the test. I could say to her, if it did not 
 appear unsympathizing, I wish you joy ! I did not know, 
 dear sister, of your own illness. I trust you are better and 
 
890 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 nearly restored by this time. I feel at times feeble, but still 
 travel on, sometimes rejoicing, and sometimes sorrowing over 
 the evil within. I w^ould be holy as God is holy ; but, oh, the 
 conflict makes one long to depart and be with Christ, which 
 ^v\\\ be far better ; so we think ! But the Lord is more glori- 
 fied by the exercise of our faith while battling with, and over- 
 coming the host of evil without, and with a host yet more 
 formidable within. How easy were it for Him to remove all 
 sin in a moment ; but is it not more for His glory that the 
 work of the Holy Spirit should be made more manifest in our 
 souls in subduing, counteracting, and overruling; overruling 
 that for good which would be otherwise dire destruction ? And, 
 oh, is it not that thing that lays us low and keeps us humble 
 at his feet? I am longing and praying for a gracious revival. 
 Often do I go to the Lord and say, ' What hinders, what re- 
 strains the blessing ? Why not here ? What was done, and 
 is still doing in America, and what has been done in Scotland, 
 Avhy have we not in England ? Lord Jesus, send us, in much 
 mercy, a gracious revival in our churches.' Join your prayers 
 to mine for this blessing. The signs of the times are, at present, 
 most significant. Is the Lord on His way ? Is He coming 
 whom we look for ? It is a time for much prayer and looking 
 up. Oh for lamps trimmed and brightly burning, that we may 
 go out to meet the Bridegroom ! Soon we shall be in glory. 
 A httle while and we pass aw^ay, and are for ever with the 
 Lord. He that was dead is alive, and because He lives we 
 shal] live also. He lives for us, and we shall live together 
 with Him." 
 
 TO HER DAUGHTER. 
 
 "... What a resource is prayer — prayer to that God who 
 loves and hears us always ! We do know^ when Ave have the 
 ear of God, w^hen prayer is jjvayer. Oh, that these things 
 might be made plain by the inward teaching of the Holy 
 Ghost to those we love ! No wonder Paul could say. Pray 
 without ceasing. It is my greatest comfort and richest employ- 
 ment. I often have so much to ask, I know not how to stop. 
 The golden sceptre is held out, and my mouth is open to make 
 large demands upon infinite power and love. Oh, this holy 
 intercourse ! Oh, that all we love knew more about it ! I 
 only intended to write a few lines, but now I feel as if I could 
 fill a sheet. It is a mercv to have the heart rifjht with God — 
 
• LETTERS TO HER DAUGHTER. 891 
 
 to have an open heart, no hindrances, to confess and forsake. I 
 think there is nothing on earth Hke it. No happiness that all 
 the glory of this world could produce is equal to that of a broken 
 heart at the feet of Jesus. It is sweet to creep into the very 
 bosom of Christ, while we feel how utterly worthless and un- 
 worthy, yet how welcome w^e are." 
 
 " The poor woman that you are anxious about, dearest 
 
 E , continues the same. No hope yet, but still anxious. 
 
 At evening time it may be light to her soul. I read and 
 prayed ; she groaned, and seemed to feel ; that was all the en- 
 couragement I could get. It is in the Lord's hands. Oh, 
 what a Avretched thing to leave the concerns of the soul to the 
 last ! . . . The Lord is good and gracious, slow to anger, and 
 of great kindness. May He, dear child, make you useful 
 where you are, and keep you near Himself, Remember, you 
 are not your own, but belong to Christ. You are to do His 
 work, and have no will but His ; for be assured of this one 
 thing. His will is best at all times. For the world, I would 
 not be left to have my own way in any one thing. God grant 
 you may feel the same, and much more than your unworthy 
 mother." 
 
 "I received your letter, and am thankful you continue well. 
 May the Lord keep you so, in his own tender mercy, and 
 direct your every step, and mine, too. The providence of God 
 is a sure direction to the believer now, as the pillar of cloud 
 and of fire was to the Jev/s of old ; although I must say it re- 
 quires more caution and prayer, and much reliance on God, to 
 discern His will. We must be honest when we ask to be kept 
 from our own way ; and if we are honest, the Lord will be our 
 guide ; and a safe guide He is to all who trust in Him." 
 
 "We had rather a cold ride, but the country to me i]"ver 
 appeared more beautiful. When I looked around me, and 
 thought of His goodness in leaving this world (which, for man's 
 sin, is under the curse) with so much of its present grandeur 
 and loveliness, and recollected that the very creatures he was 
 thus mindful of, really hated Him in their hearts, and returned 
 Him nothing but evil for His good, I could have wept, and 
 did not wonder at the Prophet's speaking of rivers of tears 
 flowing from his eye as he thought of man's rebellion against 
 God.'" 
 
 "... What a poor creature I am, within and without ! 
 What a mercy to have a blessed hope of a thorough renewing, 
 
^92 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 botli of soul and body ; and what is still more glorious, both 
 to exist in union through a vast, an interminable existence ! 
 Praise be to God for this thrice-blessed hope, worth a million 
 
 of worlds. Hold fast, dearest E , your confidence, and 
 
 grow in grace and in the knowledge of God your Saviour. 
 May the Lord keep you from all evil, and your eye up to Him, 
 that you may call upon Him in every time of need, making 
 known your requests with thanksgiving. The best of blessings 
 rest upon you." 
 
 " It is wintry cold. Oh, what a mercy to have the love of 
 Christ keeping the heart w^arm within ! May it never, precious 
 child, be dreary winter with your soul and mine ; and the only 
 way to prevent this is to keep close to Jesus, and bask in the 
 sunshine of His blessed countenance. When the heart glows 
 with the love of God, everything looks pleasant and happy. 
 Happiness felt within, makes a pleasant prospect without. 
 "When Christ smiles, all is light and lightsome. May the Lord 
 give you health of body and prosperity of soul, and enable you 
 to cast all care upon Him, w^ho has cared, and who ever will 
 care for us. It were heathenism to doubt, when God Himself 
 declares it." 
 
 " My beloved child, is it not an inexpressible mercy to be 
 enabled to see God in everything, and in everything connected 
 with us individually? We do not sufficiently realize this 
 grand truth, that we are in Christ, and Christ in us. We ac- 
 knowledge it with our lips, but do not fully from the heart 
 believe it ! and, in consequence, we lose a rich enjoyment, and 
 fall far below our privilege." 
 
 TO HER SON O- 
 
 "... I hope you received my note, informing you that I 
 was better, and again in the drawing-room. So the Lord 
 graciously deals with your poor mother — every now and then 
 giving me a love-admonition to remind me that this is not my 
 rest, but that another and a better is in reserve for me. And 
 if the prospect sometimes appears to the imagination so in- 
 viting, ' what must it be to be there ! ' How great is His 
 goodness, that even here, in this vale of weeping. He should 
 at times afford precious glimpses of the coming glory, and a 
 calm assurance that it is all ready for us, waiting but our fuU 
 preparedness for its enjoyment. Last evening I joined the 
 family circle, and enjoyed some sweet hynuis. I am quite 
 
LETTER TO HEU SOX . 393 
 
 certain that for some special purpose I have been sent back 
 when so near mj home, almost in sight of it. A little while, 
 yea, a little while, and then ! May I then be better pre- 
 pared for the glory that shall be revealed to all those who love 
 his appearing. Oh, for stronger, more abiding, increasing 
 
 faith ! I am just expecting Mrs. General F . Lady L 
 
 and Miss M called yesterday, and I was able to see them. 
 
 I tell you this that your mind may be easy on my account, 
 and that you may enjoy your visit. . . . Tell dear Mrs. 
 
 R she must learn the beautiful piece, 'Jesus wept,' and 
 
 play it for me when we again meet, if permitted, in this vale 
 of tears. No weeping in heaven ! Blessed be God for the 
 hope He has given us beyond this scene of sin and sorrow. 
 Let us arise, and travel on, and ' Forward ! ' be our counter- 
 sign. The Christian life is a warfare, a conflict of faith ! and, 
 as good soldiers of Christ, we are to fight our way to glory 
 under the banner of the Captain of our Salvation, who, as the 
 Mighty Conqueror, has overcome for Himself, and has paved 
 the way for us to follow. Vs it not a fight, the flesh, the world, 
 and Satan, all withstanding us at every step? But Jesus 
 stands ready to be a present help in our every time of need. 
 I am increasingly persuaded that it is alone by constant inter- 
 course with Jesus we can attain to anything like progression 
 in the divine life. Oh, preach Jesus more and more, and you 
 will never labour in vain ! In this warfare to which I have 
 alluded, there must be no truce, no cessation. Think of a val- 
 iant soldier in an enemy's country, and in the heat of the bat- 
 tle, resting on his arms before he has gained the victory ! The 
 battle never ceases until we enter heaven more than conquerors^ 
 through Him that hath loved us. But I am sorry to say, we 
 often meet with what we call in the army, stragrjhrs — men 
 who grow weary of following the troops, who linger behind, 
 and sit down by the w^ayside. These are hinderers to those 
 who are engaged in the heavenly warfare, and are a dishonour 
 to their glorious leader. Stir up such, wherever you meet 
 with them. Only think of the crown of glory, and the ' Well 
 done, good and faithful servant,'' that awaits the overcoming 
 saint, the faithful follower of Christ ! This subject seems to 
 grow upon me as I travel on ; but I must stop. I meet with 
 50 few that seem to be in right-down earnest in this holy, 
 heavenly warfare. And yet what is there on earth that can 
 compare with this ? A warfare it is of vast importance. But 
 IT* 
 
394 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 I will close. Let me charge you to avoid everything that 
 may injure your head, and thus unfit you for your holy en- 
 gagements. A true soldier in this eventful battle may be en- 
 feebled by long exhaustion, but his Captain is no hard task- 
 master, and provides rest for His weary and wounded ones. 
 But I must conclude, although this subject opens upon me. 
 
 My love to the dear heads of the R family, and to . 
 
 Overlook all vain repetitions in my letters ; remember the 
 aged cannot do what they have done. There is more in my 
 heart than it can well contain. Oh, what will heaven be ! 
 There, and there only will there be a continuous emptying and 
 filling again of the renewed, sanctified vessel of mercy. Write 
 to me soon." 
 
 " P.S. I have written to Forbes to offer my proper con- 
 gratulations upon the Oxford University honour,* which, 
 through his indefatigable exertions, has been conferred upon 
 him, not forgetting the goodness of God in it." 
 
 The following extract should have appeared in an earlier 
 part of the volume, but the sentiments it contains are too 
 valuable and precious to be omitted : — 
 
 " Lord Lyndhurst is now able to see, the operation having 
 proved entirely successful. Oh, to give the glory of all our 
 blessings not to man, but to God ! How needful is the long- 
 suffering patience of a good and gracious God to us ! How 
 slow to anger, how ready to forgive ! How we ought to love 
 Him, and by our love make up the deficiency of all that is 
 lacking in those that love Him not ! How sweet it is to go 
 and tell Him how much we love Him, and then to feel that 
 we love Him because He first loved us ! "What a stupendous 
 privilege, this holy union and communion with Jesus — God- 
 man Mediator — God-with-us ! How blessed it is to open our 
 heart just as it is, with all its coldness, deadness, and sinful- 
 ness, to Him, keeping nothing back, but telling Him all ! What 
 a rehef, under any circumstances, is the mighty privilege ! 
 Though the whole world were to turn its back upon us, and 
 clouds gathered thick and darkened around, yet here is a 
 shelter, a pavilion, and a hiding-place, full of comfort and 
 safety, in the verv heart of Jesus, God's dear and well-beloved 
 Son. 
 
 * At the installation of the Earl of Derby, the honorary degree of 
 D.C.L. was conferred upon her son, Dr. Forbes Winslow. 
 
TELLING JESUS ALL. 895 
 
 '' Oh, the mercy of mercies to know Him, even were there 
 not an endless hereafter, when we expect to see and enjoy 
 Him through an endless eternity ! Shall these eyes see Jesus ? 
 Yes, those very eyes shall behold Him whom my soul loveth. 
 Let it be our aim to glorify Him here, and when we fall short, 
 hasten to acknowledge at once. Keep nothing back from 
 Christ. Have no concealments. Let us carry our failures 
 and misdoings, our seen and unseen evil — evil within and fears 
 without — all, all at once to Jesus. He has engaged to heal 
 all our diseases, to help all our infirmities, and to give us every 
 possible good for time and for eternity. Oh, do help me to 
 praise Him — help me to love Him! I think if I had ten 
 thousand hearts, I could give them all to Him. Good-bye. 
 Do not go where there is fever, nor expose yourself to the 
 heat of the day, nor overwork yourself. Remember, the body 
 is redeemed as well as the soul, and that both belong to 
 Christ." 
 
CHAPTER XIV. 
 
 The last epoch of the Christian's hfe — such a life as these 
 pages have attempted to portray — cannot but be pecuharly 
 interesting and impressive. It were, perhaps, incorrect to 
 speak of it as the most instructive part of his history. A pro- 
 longed course of unreserved consecration to Christ, the record 
 of which would be but a continuous testimony to the truth of 
 the Bible, the character of God, and the power of the Saviour's 
 grace in upholding and succouring, sanctifying and comforting 
 the believer, must necessarily constitute a volume of instruc- 
 tion, such as the most triumphant departure could scarcely 
 supply. If this be so, of how much greater moment, then, is 
 it that the Christian should be solicitous how he should live, 
 rather than forestall, by vain and fruitless speculations, the 
 question how he shall die ! It is the life, and not the death, 
 that supplies the most satisfactory and assured evidence of real 
 conversion. "Tell me not," says the excellent John Newton, 
 "how a man died ; rather tell me how he lived.^' Let but the 
 religion of an individual be a living, practical embodiment of 
 the noble sentiment of Paul, "For me to live is Christ," and 
 he need not be unduly anxious about his final change ; that 
 change, be it whatever God appoints, must be his gain. It is 
 not always that a life of such transcendant beauty — ' the beauty 
 of holiness' — as that which we have sought to delineate, is 
 closed by a departure of such corresponding interest and 
 grandeur. As if to illustrate the importance, and to enforce 
 the lesson of a holy life, as a thing of essential moment, God 
 has sometimes disappointed a too eager and, perhaps, too 
 curious expectation, and has taken home His child, not in a 
 chariot of fire, but of cloud. We are now, however, to trace 
 the harmony between an eminently godly life, and a singularly 
 happy death. Indeed, so strangely and beautifully alike were 
 the two, it were difficult to decide which the most became her, 
 and which brought most honour to God — the dying life or the 
 living death. Both were emjiliatically — life in Jesus. 
 
LAST EPOCH OF THE CHRISTIAN LIFE. 397 
 
 The reader, as he unfolds the closing leaves of this volume, 
 will not fail to mark, we will not say the growing spirituality 
 of its subject, but the deepening glory into which she was so 
 soon to enter. Every thought and word, every look and action, 
 now indicated the nearness of the soul to a higher, nobler, and 
 more genial state of being. While the ' weary wheels of life ' 
 moved slower and slower, the ' deathless principle ' within 
 gathered fresh strength, and with uplifted pinions and panting 
 bosom, waited and watched the signal for its flight.* Uncon- 
 sciously to herself, but visibly to all around her, she grew still 
 more heavenly. And as each day some crumbling fragment 
 of the earthly house gave way, the opening chinks let in upon 
 her soul richer streams of the light and blessedness of the 
 upper world, imparting to her countenance inimitable beauty, 
 and to her conversation an indescribable charm. And now 
 she wearied to be gone. As pines the fond child for its home, 
 as sighs the way-worn traveller for his rest, as longs the storm- 
 tossed voyager for the port, so panted she to depart and be 
 with Christ. 
 
 Nothing could now exceed the hallowed, elevating tone of 
 her conversation. Many flocked to her, as much to be in- 
 structed by her holy counsels, to be comforted by her heavenly 
 words, and to be encouraged and stimulated by her trustful, 
 cheerful piety, as to watch the growing splendor of her setting 
 sun. All who now heard her testify of God, of Christ, and 
 of heaven, irresistibly felt what a reality was vital religion, 
 how beautiful was gospel holiness, how glorious was a risen 
 Saviour, and how solemnly true, and strangely near, was the 
 eternal world ! Turn we now to some of her precious thoughts 
 gathered from her closing remains, and recorded in her journal 
 a short time preceding her last illness. 
 
 " There remaineth, therefore, a rest for the j>eo2)le of God. Oh, 
 what a rest that will be ! Sitting down to rest awhile this 
 aged body, I am reminded of that blessed, eternal rest prepared 
 for both soul and body. Lord, let me even here find Thyself 
 
 • " The nearer slill she draws to land, 
 The more her sacred joys expand; 
 With steady hehn, and well-bent sail, 
 Her anchor drops within the vail : 
 Triumphant now she claps her wings, 
 And her celestial sonnet sings, 
 
 Glorv to God ! " 
 
398 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 my sweetest resting-place. Oh, to rest in Thy exceeding great 
 and precious promises — to rest in Thy tender, unchanging love 
 — to rest in Thy Almighty power and Godhead — to rest in 
 Jesus, my own Jesus, who has made Himself over to me as my 
 Saviour, my Redeemer, and Friend, and who has promised 
 never to le^ve nor forsake me ! Then He is here ; and while 
 I rest this weary frame. He is present with me. Bless the 
 Lord my soul ! " 
 
 "Texts last Sabbath: morning — Now, our Lord Jesus Christ 
 Himself, and God, even our Father, which hath loved us, and 
 hath given us everlasting consolation and good hope through 
 grace, comfort your hea7'ts, and stahlish you in every good word 
 and work. 2 Thess. ii. 16, 17. Evening — Thy sun shall no 
 more go down, neither shall thy moon withdraiu itself; for the 
 Lord shall he thine everlasting light, and the days of thy mourning 
 shall he ended. Isaiah Ix. 20. These precious portions have 
 been each a word of rich consolation to my soul, drawing forth 
 my heart to the Lord in gratitude and love. Blessed, for ever 
 blessed, be His name for all His great goodness to me and 
 mine. What a God has He been to me, who hath loved 7ne 
 a)id given me everlasting consolation and good hope through grace, 
 no tongue, no, not that of the highest angel in heaven can tell. 
 They know not, nor can they enter into my feelings ; nor have 
 they any cognizance of what is passing between a broken 
 heart for sin and a sin-forgiving God. My sins, which are 
 mountains high, are all pardoned, blotted out of the book of 
 God's remembrance by the precious blood of His dear and 
 well-beloved Son. Praise God for His marvellous goodness 
 to me a sinner." 
 
 " A most refreshing view of Jesus this morning has filled 
 my heart with love, and joy, and hope — love to Him who has 
 done so much for unworthy me. What shall I render unto 
 Him for all the benefits received at His hands ? He draws 
 me sensibly near to Himself, and indulges me with precious 
 views of that glory that will be revealed in me and in all them 
 also who love his appearing." 
 
 " My heart within me leapeth, 
 It cannot be downcast ; 
 In sunshine brig-ht it keepetb 
 A never-ending feast. 
 
 *' The sun which, sniiUng, hghts me, 
 To Jesus Christ alone, 
 
CLOSING RECORDS OF DIAEY. 399 
 
 And what to sing invites me, 
 Is heaven on earth begun ? " 
 
 " The Lord is most gracious in permitting me so sensibly to 
 approach him, to talk with Him by the way, to hft up upon 
 me the light of his ineffable countenance. I have been plead- 
 ing with Him to-day to be especially near to me in a dying hour ; 
 to come with the pale messenger, and let me see the uplifting 
 of his face, irradiated with beams of love, as I tread that dark 
 valley. Oh, to feel Jesus with me then, applying His precious 
 blood to my conscience, speaking pardon, peace, love, full and 
 complete ! May I be enabled to triumph over my last enemy, 
 and exclaim, Death,, where is thy sting f Grave, where is 
 thy victory? Bonar remarks, ' Our life throughout is one un- 
 ceasing battle with death, until, for a season, death conquers 
 us, and we fall beneath his power ; but the prey shall be taken 
 from the mighty, and his victim rescued for ever. The trum- 
 pet shall sound, and the dead shall arise triumphant over death, 
 hell, and the grave,' " 
 
 " What a blessing it is to have such a Friend to go to as 
 Jesus, wdth all our difficulties, small and great, transferring 
 them to His hands who is infinite in wisdom and in power, and 
 will do all things well. Is not this a mercy worth recording 
 in letters of gold, to be written in the deep recesses of every 
 believing heart? May I have stronger faith and deeper views 
 of truth. Lord, impart to me more of Thyself. Fill this heart 
 with Thy love, engrave Thine image there, and let me not 
 lose sight of Thee for one small moment." 
 
 "Thou Lamb of God, Thou Prince of Peace ! 
 For Thee my thirsty soul doth pine ; 
 My longing heart implores Thy grace, 
 Oh, make me in Thy likeness shine. 
 
 '• "With guileless, ever-humble mind. 
 Thy will in all things may I see ; 
 In love be every wish resign'd, 
 And hallow" d my whole heart to Thee. 
 
 " Close by thy side still may I keep, 
 Howe'er life's various currents flow; 
 With steadfast eye mark every step,^ 
 And follow Thee where'er Thou go.*' 
 
 " How can I ever recount the wonders of His love ! Won- 
 drous are, and ever have been, all His doings with me. His 
 
400 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 'vhole heart is love, and nothing but love ; nor will eternity 
 see its end. Thou beloved of my soul, tell, oh, tell me, how 
 I can show forth Thy praise, and best speak of Thy Avondrous 
 goodness to me, the chief of sinners. I think of what Thou 
 didst suffer for me — Thy night of watching, Thy day of grief, 
 the trial, the cruel mockings, the thorny crown, the breaking 
 heart — all, all for me, my sins, my cruel sins, charged to Thy 
 account. Jesus, precious Jesus, put such a heart within me 
 as shall never let me forget for one moment what it cost Thee 
 to save my soul. Hell would have been my portion, hadst 
 thou not died that I might live for ever. And now, what 
 returns ! Often the worst. Often have I forgotten Thee, 
 though Thou hast never once lost sio-ht of me. Dear Jesus, 
 give me a heart like Thine own. I cannot be satisfied without 
 one cast in Thy mould, reflecting Thy own likeness. How 
 precious Thou art to me, language fails to express. I cannot 
 even tell Thee. I can but weep out my love at Thy feet, and 
 there would I lie to all eternity. When, dear Lord, shall I 
 see Thee face to face ? Prepare me for the last struggle. And 
 should the enemy come in like a flood, arraying my sins 
 before me, oh, manifest Thyself then, and fill the gloomy val- 
 ley with the brightness of Thy presence ! When heart and 
 flesh are failing, leave me not. Be gracious, be merciful, and 
 say to my panting spirit. It is I, he not afraid; and let me 
 leave a testimony behind to Thy unceasing faithfulness. Oh, 
 blessed prospect of soon being with Thee whom my soul 
 loveth ! How my heart bounds at the thought. And shall I 
 behold that dear, that blessed face without a veil, that has so 
 often beamed upon me its ineffable love and sympathy? 
 Lord, I love Thee with a love so ardent, all language fails 
 me." 
 
 " Have been much impressed with some remarks on the 
 
 sight of the dying. ' The late remarked, when he was 
 
 dying, '^ Mother, I can see a great distance," Doubtless this 
 is the experience, beautifully expressed, by every one who 
 comes with a chastened faith to a calm deathbed. In his 
 progress through ordinary life, the vapors that float in his 
 mental atmosphere render the vision imperfect, and he cannot 
 see afar off; but as he draws near eternity, the air grows purer, 
 the light brighter, the vision clearer, and serenity pervades 
 the whole being ; the vista of futurity opens to the eyes of the 
 soul ; he beholds the gate of heaven, and the river of life, 
 
CLOSING RECORDS OF DIARY. 401 
 
 its glad waters kissing the footstool of the throne of God ; the 
 glories of the new world grow brighter upon him ; with Ste- 
 phen, he beholds Jesus at the right hand of the Father ; and 
 as he dwells with rapture on these entrancing sights, the earth 
 and all its scenery grows dim about him, and like Elisha's 
 servant at the gate of Damascus, he is instantly environed 
 with troops of angels who come to take him up over the ever- 
 lasting hills in the chariot of the Lord of Hosts.' Oh, that 
 this might be my experience ! Then, when my eyes are 
 closing in death, may I have these refreshing, far-seeing views 
 of Jesus, my best, my dearest Friend." 
 
 " Blessed he the Lord^ my strength, ivhich ttacheth my hands 
 to luar, and my fingers to fight; my goodness and my fortress^ 
 my high toiver, my shield, and He in whom I trust. Such is 
 God, my God, to his unworthy handmaid. "Without Him, 
 hfe w^ere an aching void, earth a wilderness of woe and sor- 
 row. He it is Avho maketh my heart glad, and in Him I con- 
 fide. And if thus He can transform this wilderness into a 
 little heaven, making it radiant with His presence, what must 
 heaven itself be ! " 
 
 " / will sing of Thy poioer ; yea, I ivill sing aloud of TJiy 
 mercy in the morning ; for Thou hast been my defence and refuge 
 in the day of my trouble. Unto Thee, O my strength, will 1 
 sing ; for God is my defence and the God of my mercy. Psa. 
 lix. 16, 17. This has God been to me throughout my event- 
 ful pilgrimage ; and so is he now that that pilgrimage is draw- 
 ing to its close. How can I praise Him as my heart desires ? 
 Language fails me, and thought is too big for utterance. Vast 
 as eternity are His mercies, infinite His perfections, and won- 
 derful all His ways. What will eternity disclose to my 
 astonished sight, my ej^es then imveiled to see what now I 
 understand not ! O God my Lord, draw me sensibly nearer 
 to Thyself. Reveal to me Thy hidden love, and conform me 
 closer to Thy image. My soul longeth to behold Thee, to see 
 Thy face unveiled. Surely I shall know Thee ; for have I 
 not, even in this vale of tears, been favoured with precious 
 glimpses of Thy countenance, radiant with love and sympathy? 
 When trouble has threatened to overwhelm me, then Thou 
 hast condescended to speak comfortable v.'ords to Thy sorrow- 
 ing child. May I never ferget it ! May I be humbled, even to 
 the dust, for my base returns ; for how often, when fresh trou- 
 ble has arisen, I have so little remembered past deliverances. 
 Oh, the baseness of man ; the goodness of God ! " 
 
402 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 " Religion should be tlie whole business of a man's life. 
 Nothing is of such vast, such paramount importance. And is 
 not the thought appalling, that it is one of the last things the 
 generality of men think of, if left to themselves? Then how 
 ought we to pray for and exhort sinners to repent and turn to 
 God! Should we not thus reason with them — 'You have 
 departed from God : repent and believe the Gospel ; for why 
 will ye die ? " This should be our expostulation with evei y 
 unconverted person we meet. May the Lord make us faithful 
 and dihgent ! God be praised for the boundless love treasured 
 up in Jesus for every poor sinner that seeks it with the whole 
 heart. Let us who believe, pray, and exhort, and employ 
 every opportunity to arouse, to instruct, and win all to Christ, 
 who has life, yea, eternal life, to give to all who seek it sin- 
 cerely and earnestly, even with the whole heart." 
 
 " When I go hence, shall not my ten thousands of prayers 
 be answered in the salvation of n "^ seed and of my seed's 
 seed to the latest generation ? Is L ^ not a God bound by 
 His own word to answer prayer ? and did He not promise me 
 in the days of my deep sorrow, ' I will be a Father to thy 
 fatherless ? ' And oh, how blessedly, in spite of all my base- 
 ness and unworthiness, has He fulfilled that promise ? As for 
 Me, this is my covenant with thee, saith the Lord. My Spirit 
 that is upon thee, and my words which I have put in thy mouth, 
 shall not depart out of thy mouthy nor out of the mouth of thy 
 seed, nor out of the mouth of thy seed^s seed saith the Lord, from 
 henceforth and for ever. Isa. lix. 21. May I not take this 
 promise to myself?" 
 
 " Confined to my bed. All my thinkings, and all my doings, 
 are now with God. I have to deal most clearly with God in 
 Jesus now. He is all in all to me. I feel a blessed nearness 
 to Jesus, to heaven. My soul holds converse with Him, and 
 sweet I find it to lie as a helpless infant at His feet ; yea, 
 passive in his loving hands, knowing no will but His. Holy 
 and distinguished is the privilege of talking with Him as a 
 man talketh with his friend, without restraint or concealment. 
 What a mercy, thus to unburden the whole heart — the tried 
 and weary, the tempted and sorrowful heart — tried by sin, 
 tried by Satan, tried by those you love ! What a mercy to 
 have a loving bosom to flee to, one truly loving heart to con- 
 fide in, which responds to the faintest breathing of the Spirit. 
 Precious Jesus, how inexpressibly dear art Thou to me at this 
 
BEYOND THE SMILING AND TflE WEEPINO.*' 40B 
 
 moment ! Keep sensibly near to me. Lift up upon me thy 
 heavenly countenance, for it is sweeter, dearer, better than 
 life." 
 
 " Oh, the abounding, superabounding mercies of my God 
 and Father, my reconciled Father, to my soul ! How amply 
 has He met my every exigence, and cared for my necessities, 
 body, soul, and spirit, and manifests Himself to me in this 
 pleasant, quiet room. Precious Jesus, Thou hast put love in 
 the hearts of all, who are so tender, kind and loving to Thine 
 aged one ; bearing with her many infirmities, and helping me 
 patiently to endure my weakness. Blessed be Thy name for 
 placing me beneath this roof to breathe out my last moments 
 on earth here, until I exchange earth for heaven with dear 
 
 to watch over me, and finally close my eyes, when I shall 
 
 re-open them in glory. Oh, to be there ! Oh, to see Jesus 
 face to face ! To behold Him whom my soul loveth, and be 
 with Him for ever ! But a little while, and I am there." 
 
 " Beyond the smiling, and the weeping, 
 
 I shall be soon. 
 
 Beyond the waking, and the sleeping, 
 
 Beyond the sowing, and the reaping, 
 
 I !-hall be soon. 
 
 Love, rest, and home, 
 
 Sweet hope ! 
 
 Lord, tarry not, but come ! 
 
 " Beyond the blooming, and the fading, 
 I shall be soon. 
 Beyond the shining, and the shading. 
 Beyond the hoping, and the dreading. 
 I shall be soon. 
 Love, rest, and home, 
 Sweet hope ! 
 Lord, tarry not, but come ! 
 
 " Beyond the rising, and the setting, 
 
 I shall be soon. 
 
 Beyond the soothing, and the fretting, 
 
 Beyond remembering, and forgetting, 
 
 I shall soon be. 
 
 Love, rest, and home, 
 
 Sweet hope! 
 
 Lord, tarry not, but come ! 
 
 *' Beyond the gathering, and the strovving, 
 I shall be soon. 
 Beyond the ebbing, and the flowing, 
 Beyond the coming, and the going, 
 
404 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 I shall be soon. 
 
 Love, rest, and home, 
 
 Sweet hope ! 
 
 Lord, tarry not, but come ! 
 
 "Beyond the parting, and the meeting, 
 I shall be soon. 
 Beyond the farewell, and the greeting. 
 Hearts fainting now, and now high beating, 
 I shall be soon. 
 Love, rest, and home, 
 Sweet hope ! 
 Lord, tarry not, but come! 
 
 "Beyond the frost-chain, and the fever, 
 I shall be soon. 
 Beyond the rock-waste and the river, 
 Beyond the ever, and the never, 
 I shall be soon. 
 Love, rest, and home, 
 Sweet hope ! 
 Lord, tarry not, but come!" 
 
 " There are periods in one's eventful history when one sees, 
 and yet does not see, hears, and yet does not hear. Thus, 
 when I see and hear what I would not, and cannot remedy, I 
 go to Jesus and disclose my impotence to Him, beseeching 
 Him to undertake. Oh, the unspeakable privilege of having such 
 a resort, a resort so accessible to a poor, weary, oft-tried pilgrim, 
 moving on through a wilderness thronged with the thorn and 
 the briar, and often echoing with the bowlings of that roaring 
 lion who seeks to devour, and yet cannot touch the saints, 
 since the Lio7i of the tribe of Judah has chained him fast. How 
 true that it is a life of faith the Christian has to live while 
 passing to his crown of glory ! Many are the trials, disap- 
 pointments, and vexations he is to meet with by the way ; but 
 these are things which keep the life of faith in vigorous exer- 
 cise, work the soul's best interest, and glorify God. Whatever 
 drives or allures us to Jesus is a blessing. The great welfare 
 of the soul is the concern of heaven. All the heavenly host 
 are deeply interested and absorbed in the salvation of Christ's 
 little flock, whom the Shepherd that died for them is conduct- 
 ing to the fold above. Oh, to be ever looking forward to 
 what is to come!" 
 
 " How sweet and sacred is broken-hearted communion with 
 Jesus, God's dear Son, crucified for our sins, and risen again 
 for our justification ! It is a mercy of mercies to be permitted 
 
BROKEN-HEARTED COMMUNION WITH JESUS. 405 
 
 to draw near to Him with an open, confiding, thougli a contrite 
 heart — telhng him all one feels, and desires, and fears. What 
 an inestimable privilege to have such a friend always so near ! 
 We have not to ascend into heaven, nor have we to descend 
 into the deep, to seek for Him ; for Ho always is near, one 
 with us, one in us, yea, a part of ourselves. How constantly 
 is the Lord seeking to withdraw us from the arm of flesh, to a 
 more simple and unbounded confidence in Himself ! To whom 
 shall we look ? He answers, Look unto Me, and he ye saved, 
 all the ends of the earth ; for I am God, and there is none else. 
 Blessed be God, even my God, for every precious word written 
 in that Book of Books — the Bible. Oh, that it may be un- 
 ceasingly precious to my soul. It is good for me to have been 
 tried, though it scarcely can be called a trial, since so sweetly 
 and blessedly has the Lord dealt with me in it. When I can 
 call Jesus mine (as I can at this moment,) trials are no trials. 
 Yes, Jesus is mine, He is sensibly near ; and all I need and 
 all I desire is in Him, in comparison of whom all the glory, 
 and honour, and riches of the world are as dross. How 
 sweetly and confidingly can I rest in His faithfulness and love. 
 He lives, and I shall live, because my life is bound up with 
 His life. Blessed reality ! Lord, my time now is short ; 
 I would fain be useful in encouraging others to come to Thee, 
 thou Fountain, 3- ea, thou Ocean of living waters, that they, too, 
 may draw supplies from Thine infinite, inexhaustible fulness. 
 Oh, the mightiness of the privilege of having, not the hearken- 
 ing ear only, but the loving heart of God towards and upon us ! 
 And if He has set His heart upon us, making us His people," 
 redeeming us from all evil, past, present, and to come, should 
 we not set our hearts upon Him, and upon Him only and con- 
 fidently ? Lord, here is my heart, my poor heart ; take it just 
 as it is, and make it all that Thou wouldst have it to be ; cast 
 it into Thy mould, and let it receive and reflect Thine image, 
 Thou Son of God, thou inexpressibly, precious Jesus, thou 
 Saviour of sinners, thou Redeemer of my never-dying soul!" 
 
 " Oh, that the Lord would descend, and give us a gracious 
 revival in our souls, and in the congregation. We need an 
 especial outpouring of the Holy Spirit. Lord, send down 
 gracious answers to our prayers. Come Thou among us, and 
 do us good ; for none but Thyself can do us good. Follow the 
 
 letter "that I have written to Lord with Thy blessing. 
 
 Direct in all our i:)Oor concerns. Make us upright before Thee. 
 
406 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 Let Thy fear rule, and Thv love constrain us to do Thy will. 
 Search all our hearts, and cast out that which is wrong in Thy 
 sight. May we live upon Thee, and for Thee, and rejoice and 
 be glad that Thou seest us always, desiring to have no con- 
 cealments from Thee, our best and dearest Friend. Be with 
 Thine handmaid throughout this day, directing in all that lies 
 before her, giving wisdom and grace, a right judgment and an 
 upright heart, and withholding not thy presence. Amen and 
 amen." 
 
 " Nothing in my hands I bring, 
 Yet all things from thy hand receive." 
 
 " The apostle, speaking of those who separated themselves 
 from the true Church of Christ, says. They went out from us^ 
 hut they were not of us; for if they had been of us, they would 
 no doubt have continued with us ! but they went out that they 
 might be manifest that they were not all of us. 1 John ii. 19. 
 It strikes me, these are the real dissentients, those who separate 
 themselves from the church of God. We are evidently draw- 
 ing near the time which will mark the consummation of all 
 things. The light of the glorious gospel of the blessed God 
 will shine brighter and brighter, and then will be more clearly 
 revealed — only to be entirely and for ever effaced — the dark 
 spots that now obscure the beauty of the Lord's church ; and 
 then will she, freed from all that is now dishonouring to her 
 Head, stand forth a glorious church, complete in all her loveli- 
 ness, in the presence of a holy God. Oh, then, let us, who 
 really and truly are the Lord's, unite together in bands ot 
 Christian love to contend earnestly for the faith once delivered to 
 the saints, and aim in all things to return to the beautiful sim- 
 plicity of Christ. Lord, pour out Thy Spirit upon Thy people, 
 enlightening, healing, and sanctifying ; and hasten the time 
 when, coming in all Thy glory, the glory of the Father and of 
 the holy angels. Thou wilt claim Thy bride. Thy one r^ --r>]i^ 
 and present her without sjjot, or ivrinkle, or any such thihj. 
 
 " Give ear to my prayer, God; and hide not Thyself from 
 my supplications. Oh, that my children might live before Thee ! 
 This is my daily prayer, that to the latest generation they may 
 be a seed to serve Thee. Lord, incline Thine ear to 
 my request, and deny me not, for Jesus' sake. I am Thine, 
 and Thou art mine. Jesus has said it, and I believe it. God 
 be praised for His wondrous goodness to me, as poor and needy 
 
LONGING FOR REVIVAL. 407 
 
 a sinner as ever lived ; and vet I shall live for ever, and rejoice 
 in God my Saviour through an endless eternity," 
 
 " When Christians meet together, do they not too much talk 
 ahout religion, preachers and sermons ? I cannot but think, 
 that if they communed less about religion, and more of Jesus, 
 it would give a higher tone of spirituality to their conversation, 
 and prove more refreshing to the soul. He v^-ould then oftener 
 draw near, and make Himself one in their midst, and talk with 
 them by the way." 
 
 " Jesus, Thou art unspeakably precious to my soul. How 
 precious, Thou knowest. Do not I love Thee? Search my 
 heart, for Thou canst read its every thought and feeling, and 
 see if I do love Thee. Blessed by Thy name for Thy love to 
 worthless me. I love Thee, because Thou first loved me. / 
 am He that liveth and ivas dead, and, behold I am alive for 
 evermore.'^ 
 
 " 'Tis past -the dark and dreary night, 
 And, Lord, we liail I hee now, 
 Our morning star, without a cloud 
 Of sadness on thy brow. 
 
 *• Thy path on earth, the cross, the grave, 
 Thy sorrows, all are o'er ; 
 And, sweet thought ! Thine eyes shall weep, 
 Tliy heart shall break, no more. 
 
 ** Deep were those sorrows ; deeper still 
 Ihe love that brought thee low — 
 That bade the stream of life from Thee, 
 A lifeless victim, flow. 
 
 "The soldier, as he pierced Thee, proved 
 Mans hatred, Lord, to Thee ; 
 While in the blood that stain "d the spear, 
 Love, only love, we see." 
 
 "Heaven in prospect is very sweet tome. My happiest 
 moments are spent in its contemplation. My soul holds un- 
 seen communion with Christ and with the pure spirits around 
 the throne, now in the full enjoyment of His unveiled beauties. 
 I think I can behold their joy, and seem at times to be so near 
 that but a transparent vail separates me from them, and that 
 with one step I am there. I delight to contemplate some near 
 and dear to me (dearer and nearer now than ever,) who have 
 recently passed away from a world of sin and sorrow. Happy 
 spirits ! ye are safe at last. Ye have outrun me in the race, 
 have reached the goal, and are at home before me." 
 
408 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 " Beloved ones, whom i hope through infinite 
 mercy, to meet in heaven, 
 
 "First and chiefest, my own most precious Redeemer, en- 
 throned in all His glory. His comitenance radiant with ineffable 
 love, and a welcome beaming from every feature. So shall I 
 behold Him who loved me with an everlasting love, and 
 landed me at last in the kingdom of glory. Then I shall meet 
 my beloved husband, his little faith at the eleventh hour saving 
 him for ever. Then my eyes will be fixed upon my precious 
 mother, saying to me, as she welcomes me home, ' Here, my 
 
 child, the weary find eternal rest.' And then dear H , 
 
 whose simple faith, more costly than the most splendid gifts, 
 placed him beyond the reach of hfe's stormy winds. And then 
 will come dear S and dear F , whose sincere, child- 
 like confidence in Jesus gave them the victory, and lodged 
 them safely within His arms. There, too, shall I greet many 
 whom I knew and loved below. Dear Mr. Evans and his 
 wife, dear Mr. Whitmore, and a host of others, all encirchng 
 the throne, and basking in the full sunshine of the Redeemer's 
 countenance, while I shall lie prostrate at His feet in wondering 
 joy and adoring love at the matchless grace that brought me 
 there. Hallelujah! hallelujah! praise, endless praise to God!" 
 
 "With indescribable solemnity and tenderness of feeling, we 
 thus have transcribed the last record of her journal. It was 
 with a trembling hand we lifted the vail that disclosed to other 
 eyes the most sacred thoughts and feelings of her soul. We 
 drop the vail — for we can disclose no more ! Bearing us 
 through many years of daily walk with God, to the threshold 
 of heaven, she disappears within its unapproachable glory, and 
 the last notes we catch from her closing lips are, ' Praise, end- 
 less PRAISE to God ! And then she laid aside her harp 
 below, because she could rouse it to no sweeter, loftier strain. 
 
 '• Death darken'd her eye. and folded her wings, 
 And the sweetest note is the la-it that she sings." 
 
 It was in the early part of the year 1854, that the indications 
 of a gradual decay of nature became apparent. To those who 
 watched with wakeful eye each new symptom of waning 
 power, the evidences were painfully unmistakable that she 
 was nearing her long desired haven. She still, however, 
 persisted in attending the public means of grace — for she 
 Moved the habitation of God's house, and the place where His 
 
LAST SABBATH IN THE SANCTUARY. 409 
 
 lionour d^velt' — often when the state of the weather and her 
 own-felt weakness might have pleaded her exemption. Her 
 last service in the sanctuary of God below, was on Lord's'day 
 morning, July 30th. The subject of the discourse could 
 scarcely have been more in harmony with the affecting oc- 
 casion, had the sad truth been known, that her next minghng 
 with the great congregation would be in the New Jersualem 
 above, of which the Lord God Almighty and the Lamb are 
 the temple. The text was selected from the tenth chapter of 
 John's gospel, and the first clause of the twenty-eighth verse — 
 "I GIVE UNTO THEM ETERNAL LIFE." The Varied aspccts of 
 the theme, — the glorious truths which it developed, the bright 
 visions of future blessedness which it necessarily brought before 
 the mind, were well calculated to afford nourishment for passing 
 over Jordan. And so she acknowledged. Returning from 
 this her final public service on earth, she expressed in affecting 
 language the refreshment her spirit had experienced, and gave 
 vent to her full heart of thanksgiving and praise for the 
 glorious gospel of Christ, and for the assured hope of eternal 
 life which it revealed. 
 
 As the sea air — her native air — always acted upon her con- 
 stitution like a charm, it was hoped that a few weeks' sojourn 
 at Brighton would prove a restorative. It failed, however, to 
 realize the hope cherished ; and finding her powers rapidly 
 failing, she expressed an earnest desire to return to her home. 
 Most grateful was she to find herself once more in her own 
 quiet chamber, which had been to her so often, as she expressed 
 it, ' a Bethel to her soul,' the very walls of which might be said 
 
 The quiet chamber where the Christian sleeps, 
 And where, from year to year, he prays and weeps ; 
 Whence, in the midHight watch, his thoughts arise 
 To those bright mansions where his treasure lies ; 
 How near it is to ah his faith can see ! 
 How short and peaceful may the passage be ! 
 One beating pulse — one feeble struggle o'er, 
 May open wide the everlasting door. 
 Yes, for that bliss unspeakable, unseen, 
 Is ready, and the vail of flesh between 
 A gentle sigh may reud— and then display 
 The broad, full splendour of an endless day. 
 Tills bright conviction elevates his mind, 
 He presses forward, leaving all behind. 
 Thus from the throne the tyrant foe is hurl'd, — 
 Tliis is the faith that overcomes thp world." — Jaxe Taylor. 
 18 
 
410 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINS LOW. 
 
 to have been tinted with her prayers.* Sbo Avas not, however, 
 entirely confined to her room. Until within a few weeks of 
 her translation — for such we must designate her departure — 
 she was enabled, occasionally, to join the family circle, unite 
 in its devotions, and listen to some of her favourite hymns upon 
 the piano, often affected to tears while they were sung. During 
 intervals of her illness, supported in bed, she still employed her 
 pen in brief, holy exhortations, a few quotations from which 
 are subjoined. 
 
 "... Oh, to live for eternity ! To live to-day, as if to- 
 morrow we should be there. Eternity ! eternity ! Oh, solemn 
 thougjit ! The eye, the all-searching eye of God is upon us at 
 this moment. Let us, then, dear brother, act for eternity. 
 May the constraining love of Christ — the eternal love of the 
 Holy Ghost, rest upon you, keep, direct, and bless you ! " 
 
 In a solemn entreaty to an unconverted individual, her love 
 of souls, — the ruling passion of her life, — never appeared more 
 earnest. 
 
 "... And are these things so, dear friend ? Yes, they 
 are. Jesus Christ is risen indeed, and has gone up on high, 
 and has opened the kingdom of heaven to all believers. Oh, 
 then, why not live ? Jesus stands ready to receive, is prepared 
 to welcome you. He will cast none out who repair to Him 
 for help and safety. Oh, I could stand upon the housetop, and 
 cry aloud. Come to Jesus — come now — come at once. He is 
 all-sufficient to save, and is as willing as He is able. In a lit- 
 tle while, and whether rich or poor, high or low, learned or 
 unlearned, o?ze thing will be of infinite moment — your calling 
 and election made sure to you. Lose no time in this great, 
 this greatest of all great transactions — the salvation of your 
 soul. Delay not, lest the enemy take possession of you, and 
 you are lost for ever. Why luill ye die f " 
 
 A temporary reviving of her strength elicited in a brief note 
 to a friend some grateful, holy thoughts. 
 
 " Through the unchanging mercies of a good and gracious 
 God, I am yet spared a little longer in this vale of tears. My 
 education for a crown of glory is not yet complete. When it 
 is, I shall be called to behold Him whom my soul loveth, and 
 go no more out for ever. eternity ! eternity ! An endless 
 life of never-ceasing glory awaits the feeblest follower of that 
 same Jesus, who sufiered, bled, and died on Calvary, and who 
 now, in that very same body (though glorified), is enthroned, 
 prepared to welcome home the feeblest of his little flock. 01 1, 
 
HOLY COUNSELS. 411 
 
 to live, while here, in close intercourse with Him ! This is 
 our mighty privilege. Do not let us, dear friend, lose sight of 
 Jesus. Daily intercourse will bring us more to partake of 
 His lovely likeness. I can write no more, my strength fails. 
 Friends so kind — children so tender — a little while, and I shall 
 be with those above, who are waiting to bid me welcome. 
 Realize more and more your glorious inheritance, and covet 
 not the poor trifles of time and sense." 
 
 The following touching and solemn counsels are supposed 
 to be nearly the last sacred words her pen ever traced. They 
 were written in acknowledgment of a kind note of affectionate 
 sympathy addressed to her a few weeks before her departure : — 
 
 TO MISS L- 
 
 " Dear young Friend, — 
 
 "I am sorry to have let your kind letter remain so 
 long unanswered; and also that I am thoroughly unable to 
 say all that is in my heart to say. Young travellers to the 
 glorious kingdom need often a little counsel from those who 
 have Avaded through trials and tribulations, and have had many 
 hard lessons to learn, preparatory to the full enjoyment of the 
 coming glory. Oh, prepare to meet your God ! A little 
 while, and we pass away — all is uncertain. Oh, to be quite 
 ready ! The enemy is ever on the alert to entangle the young 
 Christian, and draw him into sin. Sin darkens the eye, and 
 hardens the heart. Keep close to Jesus. Oh, the compassion 
 that is in His heart ! Never more welcome than Avhen we 
 come with an open heart to tell Him all our failures, all our 
 sins — sins of omission and sins of commission. Always wel- 
 come to Jesus — not a feature, not a look in that blessed face 
 to grieve us. ' Oh, how He loves ! ' Keep close to Jesus. 
 Carry all your little things to Him, as well as greater matters. 
 He will bow His ear, and listen to all that you have to say. 
 Let your walk and conversation be such as to commend Him 
 to all you meet with. Be ye lioly^ for I am holy. Oh, dear 
 young friend, I have been very ill ; my happy home almost in 
 sight ! It looks lovely — oh, how lovely ! Make Jesus your 
 cliief Friend, and look more to the things that are not seen 
 find eternal. I can write no more, sitting in bed supported by 
 ] illows. My Christian love, to your worthy father. Oh, may 
 i '.i'.eet you in heaven ! Make sure of heaven. You may 
 
412 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 make man/ mistakes as it resi3ects this poor workl, but I 
 beseech you, make no mistake as it respects a vast eternity y 
 
 An unfinished note, inscribed to one of her sons, was found 
 amongst her last records. Ahnost too sacred for pubHcitj,and yet 
 too characteristic to be suppressed, we venture to subjoin it. 
 After referring to her deep maternal affection, she proceeds : 
 
 " This love emanates from the love, the pure, holy love of 
 God's dear Son, shed abroad in my heart. I know you will 
 go forth and preach Jesus Christ to poor sinners. I believe 
 He will make you a blessing. God grant it ! When I am 
 gone home, may you live long to do the will of the Lord, and 
 may I be one of the first to bid you welcome, when your work 
 is finished. I feel almost too ill to write, and must lay this by." 
 
 It was but within a short period of her happy release that 
 all hope of prolonging on earth a life so holy and precious, 
 yielded to the agonizing conviction that she w^ould soon leave 
 us. The conflict between the desire for her full enjoyment of 
 the heaven for which she longed, and the affection that would 
 still detain her here, was painfully severe ; nor was it until a 
 few moments before the last fetter was dissolved, that we could 
 find it in our hearts to comply with her often-made request, 
 and ask of God to release her from her extreme suffering, and 
 take her to Himself.* Her chamber was now literally the 
 gate of heaven, A visitor to that privileged spot might have 
 supposed himself in communion with a being standing v/ithin 
 the precincts of glory. So entirely abstracted were now all 
 her thoughts from time, and so concentrated were they upon 
 eternal things — so filled was she with the Holy Ghost — so 
 glowing with the love of Christ — so spiritual her conversation, 
 and so tender and affecting her expressions of love to all around 
 her, nothing could equal the tenderness and unearthliness of 
 the scene. It pleased God that her bodily suffering should at 
 times be severe, but the unimpaired vigour, to the last, of her 
 mental faculties was graciously vouchsafed. During the fevr 
 months of her last illness, as might be supposed, many holy 
 and precious observations fell from her Hps, some of which 
 
 * " Me, let the tender office long engage, 
 To rock the cradle of declining age ; 
 With lenient acts relieve a mother's breath. 
 Make languor smile, and smoothe the bed of death ; 
 Explore the thought, explain the asking eye, 
 And keep awhile one parent from the sky." 
 
 Pope ox Old Age. 
 
DYING SAYINGS. 413 
 
 were noted down at the time, but many others, it is to be re- 
 gretted, were not preserved. We present them rather in a 
 fi-agmentarj and detached form, than interwoven with the nar- 
 rative of the closing scene : — 
 
 "I am so happy — I cannot tell you how happy I am ! Not 
 a ruffle, not a cloud." 
 
 " Oh, how graciously the Lord is taking down the tent, pin 
 by pin. What an eventful life mine has been ! I have lived 
 much in camp, and have seen the tents struck, and the regiment 
 move off. Such is life. Jesus is all to my soul. Oh, how I 
 realize His presence ! I have a full view of Him at this mo- 
 ment. Heaven is a reality. We mystify heaven ; it is a place. 
 I am going to my family, and I shall see those whom I ought 
 
 to love as my family. Dear Mr. E , and a countless 
 
 throng of others, as dear to me as my own loved family — or, 
 who ought to be, for they have been purchased by the precious 
 blood of Jesus." 
 
 " I wonder if we shall not go over our eventful lives in 
 heaven? I think we shall." 
 
 " I wish you to keep my poor wandering mind fixed upon 
 th'at one blessed truth — Christ's glorious resurrection; for it 
 Christ rose again and is alive, I shall certainly rise and live 
 with Him for ever." 
 
 Portions of the 15th chapter of the First Epistle to the 
 Corinthians were frequently read to her, together with much 
 that fell from our Lord on the subject of the Resurrection. 
 
 " I shall enter heaven a poor sinner saved by grace. I 
 seem to have done nothing for the Lord, who has done so 
 much for me." On being reminded that she had been a faith- 
 ful parent to her children, and had also been a succorer to 
 many in affliction, she replied: — "Ah! faithless, faithless have 
 I been to my trust. 
 
 " ' Nothing in my hand I bring, 
 Simply to Thy cross I ding.'" 
 
 " I think many Christians dishonour Christ by refusing to 
 obey Him. Oh, keep close to Jesus, and neglect none of His 
 commandments. Whatever your hands find to do, do it with 
 all your might." 
 
 " Shall soon be with Jesus — shall see Him face to face. 
 Oh, glorious prospect ! Who would not be a Christian ? " 
 
 To her daughter she said : — 
 
 " Go and tell Jesus all your sorrows ; keep back nothing 
 
414 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY VriXSLOW. 
 
 from Him. You will soon be an orphan, but remember, you 
 are Christ's orphan, and will be His especial care. When 
 your father and your mother forsake you, then the Lord will 
 take you up. When you feel desolate, remember that Jesus 
 lives, and you cannot grieve alone, for He dwells within you. 
 Oh, how have I, throughout my pilgrimage, proved the Lord, 
 and ever found Him faithful to his promises ! He has never 
 failed me in any one thing, giving me more than He promised, 
 and far more than I had asked. I asked Him to restore you to 
 health, that you might comfort me in my old age^ and attend 
 me in my dying hours. What should I have done now, if He 
 had not answered me ? I am such a poor dependent creature, 
 [ cannot think for myself When you come to your last sick- 
 ness, I trust and pray that the Lord will raise you up one 
 who will be as tender a nurse to you as you have been to me. 
 May Jesus make all your bed in your sickness. He is the 
 best friend to trust ; He changes not. Oh, how full His heart 
 IS of love, I cannot express to you ! And if I had millions ot 
 tongues, I could not tell you how precious He is at this moment 
 to my soul. I feel His sensible presence. He is near to me ; 
 so near, that I feel as if I could embrace Him." 
 
 " What a glorious prospect I have in view ! Who can 
 picture it ? No tongue can tell how I love Jesus ; not because 
 it is my duty to love Him, but because I cannot help loving 
 Him. He is the chiefest among ten thousand, and the One 
 altogether lovely." 
 
 " This is Wednesday evening (the weekly lecture). Oh, 
 may the Holy Ghost rest upon the people ! Hov/ have I 
 prayed for the church. Lord, pour out Thy Spirit upon that 
 little flock, and upon , its under-shepherd." 
 
 " Talk to me of the glorious Resurrection ; I wish my mind 
 stayed upon that fact." Upon being reminded of the trans- 
 porting view Stephen had of glory, seeing Jesus standing as 
 if rising to welcome His first martyr, she replied, " Beautiful ! 
 beautiful ! and you will perhaps say, ' Mamma thinks herself 
 of much importance,' when I say that I believe Jesus will 
 stand to receive me, even me. I am the chief of sinners, but 
 am dear, very dear to the heart of Jesus, who shed His blood 
 to save me, even me, as if there were not another soul to be 
 saved." In this elevated frame she continued several days, 
 frequently observing, that "as she neared eternity, the atmos- 
 phere of heaven became brighter and brighter." 
 
DYING SAYINGS. 415 
 
 That the enemy should not allow her to pass away unchal- 
 lenged to a final conflict, is not surprising ; but it was permit- 
 ted by Him who loved her, only to render his defeat the more 
 signal, and her own victory the more complete. All one long 
 night she battled with the foe, and when morning dawned she 
 exclaimed : — 
 
 " Oh, pray for me ! pray for me ! I am under a cloud. Oh, 
 what a night of conflict I have passed ! — a conflict with death, 
 hell, and the grave. The enemy would conquer me, if he 
 could." She was reminded that all these were conquered 
 foes, and that Jesus had promised that no one should pluck 
 His people out of His hands. She replied, " True, true ; but 
 Jestis prayed, did He not? " The words were repeated, " Oh, 
 my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass away." She 
 answered, " Oh, then, is it any wonder that if the incarnate 
 Grod should thus pray, I should feel the need of prayer ? It is 
 one thing to talk of death ; it is quite another thing when it 
 becomes a reality to grapple with it. It is an easy thing to 
 speak of the war in the East — perhaps to plan an attack upon 
 the enemy ; but it is quite a different thing to be in the heat 
 of the conflict, the mighty foe contending with you foot by 
 foot. Some go out of the world without a fear, but they know 
 not and feel not the magnitude of sin. To have one's sins all 
 in review before the mind's eye, and eternity in view — this is 
 a reality, and it needs the Trinity to comfort and support the 
 sinking soul." She then referred to Bunyan's Christian pass- 
 ing over the river, and said, " How long, Lord, wilt Thou 
 keep me in the valley of the shadow of death ? Why are His 
 chariot- wheels so long in coming ?" Various passages of Scrip- 
 ture were read, which appeared to afford her much consolation; 
 to which she responded, " The Lord will comfort me through 
 His truth." 
 
 It was delightful to hear her exclaim soon after : — 
 
 " The gloom has all passed, and I have a full view of the 
 glory that awaits me. I shall soon see all the dear ones that 
 
 have gone before me. Dear F ! I shall never forget, 
 
 when visiting her grave, the words that came to me as with 
 an audible voice : She is not here, she is risen. You were 
 (addressing her daughter) a great blessing to her, and you 
 have been equally so to me. The Lord will take care of you. 
 Thousands, oh, thousands of times have I committed you to 
 His keeping." On her asking her daughter if there was any- 
 
415 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 thing she could do for her, before the Lord took her, it was 
 rephed, only that she would pray that grace might be given to 
 follow her, as she had followed Jesus. She answered, " No, not 
 as I have followed Jesus ; for I have come so far short of His 
 example. But I will pray that you may follow Jesus ivhollyy 
 
 On being asked by her daughter, on Lord's-day evening, 
 if she felt able to spare her just to go and partake of the com- 
 munion, she replied, " By all means ; and may Jesus, our 
 Head, meet you there, and speak comfortably to all His dear 
 saints. I shall not partake of it again until I drink of the new 
 wine with Jesus in our Father's kingdom. There we shall sit 
 down together at the marriage-supper of the Laml)." 
 
 " This night is long and weary. Come and let us talk 
 together of the better land, then the time will pass sweetly. 
 Oh, how often has Jesus comforted us when cast down, upheld 
 us when ready to give up our hope ! And when trouble came, 
 how often has He spoken sweet peace, and delivered us out 
 of it unhurt. Oh, to see Him in all His unvailed glory, and 
 then to turn and behold the many we have loved in the flesh 
 around the throne, shining bright and lovely in their milk- 
 Avhite robes ; Oh, the hope of heaven ! when shall I be there ? 
 I was almost in sight of it, and brought back again, seeing my 
 meetness was not complete. Even so. Thy will, not mine, 
 my Father, be done." 
 
 "You must pass through tribulations, as I have done. "VYe 
 require to be taught by various trials that this is not our rest. 
 And then come the results — the weanings, the heart-search- 
 mgs, the drawing of the spirit nearer to God, the sweet, encour- 
 aging recognitions, the gracious whispers of Jesus' love. His 
 voice saying, ' Fear not, it is I ; I will come and receive you 
 to Myself, that where I am, ye may be also.' And then comes 
 the last enemy, and the final conflict ; and the happy spirit, 
 freed from the body of sin and of death, trembling and panting, 
 is at the feet of Jesus. Oh, the bliss, the unutterable bliss 
 of that moment ! Absent from the body, it is present with 
 the Lord. Oh, the glory ! To see Jesus, once a Man of sor- 
 rows, now enthroned ; that very same Jesus who was upon 
 earth, and who has often spoken words of comfort when others 
 could not comfort." 
 
 " Lord, I weary, I weary, I lueary, to lie gone. Keep me, 
 patient, waiting Thy will. I must be perfected through siiffcr- 
 hig ; not one pang too severe, nor one sorrow too much," 
 
DYING SAYINGS. 417 
 
 *' My faith is still strong and confident that I shall meet all 
 my dear children in heaven. The Lord promised to be a 
 Father to my family. It was not for this poor world that He 
 gave me that promise, but for that world which is to come. 
 He is my Father, and He will be my children's Father. Oh, 
 I cannot find words sufficiently expressive of His loving kind- 
 ness to me. I enter heaven as a poor sinner, saved by grace." 
 
 " Kead to me the precious words of Jesus. Endeavour to 
 keep my mind upon His truth. Christ is the Rock upon which 
 my feet are placed." 
 
 " Keep close intimacies with Jesus. We must live upon 
 Christ, and we must die upon Christ." 
 
 To her daughter she said, — 
 
 " A mother's blessing rest upon you. Oh, what loving- 
 kindness has the Lord shown to me ! He has denied me 
 nothing. I have every comfort I need. I am just where I 
 would wish to die. This room has been so often a Bethel to 
 my soul. I have seemed to commune here with God face to 
 face. I am so thankful that I am liere^ 
 
 " How sweet is the sympathy of Jesus ; Jesus wept He 
 mingled His tears with Mary and Martha, and yet he met 
 Calvary without a tear." 
 
 " Oh, live for eternity ! This poor world is passing away; 
 the reality is to come, and a glorious reality it is. How im- 
 portant it is to walk so as to j^lease God in all things." 
 
 " Little faith will bring the soul to heaven ; great faith will 
 bring heaven into the soul." 
 
 " My first joy in heaven will be to see Jesus ! " 
 
 " I am passing away, but not a single cloud veils Christ 
 from my view. Language cannot express how happy, happy 
 I am. Words fail to describe the preciousness of Jesus to my 
 soul. I seem as if Christ were beckoning me to come, saying, 
 ' Why do ye delay ? Come up hither !' " 
 
 "Your prayers detain me here." 
 
 "It ought to be to you a joyous thought that I am going 
 home — going home! A welcome home. I have not a want, 
 nor care, nor trouble." 
 
 "You are going to the prayer-meeting; oh, be faithful to 
 2wofessors.^^ 
 
 "I never so felt my dependence upon the power of the 
 Holy Ghost as I now do. I have not honoured Him as I 
 should have done. One in the Godhead, he is worthy of equal 
 19* 
 
418 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 honour and praise. The power of the Holy Ghost carried 
 Christ through all of His work. In the saints, it is first seen 
 in quickening and calling them ; then, in teaching, sanctifying, 
 and comforting them all their journey through. I repeat it ; 
 I never so much felt my dependence upon the Holy Ghost as 
 I do now. My first prayer in the morning when I awake is 
 addressed to the Holy Spirit, that He would take possession of 
 my thoughts, my imagination, my heart, my words, throughout 
 the day, directing, controlling, and sanctifying them all." 
 
 " Dwell more prominently and earnestly, in your preaching, 
 upon the truth that nothing but the power of the Holy Ghost 
 can convert the soul." 
 
 " You have a great work before you, and I shall be in heaven 
 to welcome you home. Be faithful unto death. My God 
 shall supply all your need, according to His riches in glory hy 
 Christ Jesus y 
 
 "Oh, for a revival of religion! perhaps the Lord is keeping 
 me here to see it. Wrestle with God for it. If there is a 
 spot upon earth more blessed than another, it is the mercy-seat. 
 None can tell the joy that springs from it." 
 
 " Few people are aware of the communications that are 
 going on between earth and heaven. I do not wish to be 
 visionary, but many such manifestations have I had." 
 
 " This is the hour to test the reality of the gospeh It is a 
 reality, a most blessed reality." 
 
 " There is a service in heaven for Christ." 
 
 "I wish 'Praise God from whom all blessings flow,' to echo 
 through this house when I am gone." 
 
 "Soon I shall be singing His high praises in heaven. Oh, 
 how great His love ? How can He love so vile a sinner as I ? 
 Yet he loves me. I have nothing of my own goodness to 
 bring in my hand, — all, all I cast away." 
 
 " What will the music of heaven be !" 
 
 "Many people sa}^ to those going to another place, 'You 
 talk so much about it, you will be disappointed;' but oh, 
 heaven \vill transcend our highest expectations !" 
 
 Gazing one evening from her bed upon a magnificent sun- 
 set, she remarked, "Oh, if the outside of heaven is so beautiful, 
 what must it be loithin /" 
 
 "I never take a glass of cold water, but I think of Jesus' 
 words — ^'I thirst.' Lord, shall I not weep when I fix my eyes 
 upon Thy blessed face, and remember that my sins caused Thy 
 
DYING SAYINGS. 419 
 
 sufferings ? Oh, if there were a thought of my heart for 
 which Jesus did not atone, I should never enter heaven!" 
 
 "I long, I weary to be gone; but I would not be im- 
 patient." 
 
 After a day of extreme languor, she said, " The Lord has 
 fed me to-day with drops of honey. Do not grieve after 
 me." 
 
 " Note this. — There is a buoyancy, a vitality in the principle 
 of the renewed soul, which in dying, cannot be depressed. 
 The more the body decays and sinks, the higher it rises to its 
 native heaven." 
 
 "If ever there were one graciously, gently, wisely led, it is 
 I. Would that I had kept a more perfect record of all His 
 dealings with me. He would not have me a spoilt child, 
 therefore He has employed the rod; but all His corrections 
 and rebukes have been in love^ 
 
 On her grandson asking her, if he should read to her from a 
 dehghtful little book, entitled, " AYords of Jesus," placing her 
 hand upon her heart, she replied : — 
 
 " I have them all here. The Holy Ghost administers to me 
 like a little child. My loving Shepherd cherishes the lambs 
 as well as the sheep ; and He will come and take me to Him- 
 self. I shall not go alone. I want to go — I want to go," 
 
 "Oh, why are His chariot- wheels so long in coming? "Why 
 does He delay? I am longing to depart, to be with Christ. 
 All is real. If Christ is risen from the dead, then I am safe. 
 If He is ahve, then I shall be with Him for ever. I long to 
 end this mortal struggle, and can truly say — 
 
 " ' Jesus, lover of my soul, 
 Let me to thy bosom fly.' '* 
 
 On the draught being brought to her, which had so often 
 revived her sinking powers, she said, " Is it wrong to take the 
 draught that detains me here ? No, it is not wrong. I would 
 not be impatient, but I long to end the conflict, and be with 
 Jesus, Oh, how precious He is to my soul!" On the passage 
 being repeated to her, " Our light affliction, which is but for a 
 moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal 
 weight of glory," she replied, " Oh, yes ! that glory is to behold 
 the face of Jesus. The glory of heaven is Christ. It has been 
 a hard conflict through life to hold fast my confidence. Oh, 
 how far have I come short even as a professor ! But I rest 
 
420 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 upon the finished work of Jesus. I am complete in Him. 
 Stephen when dying, in such painful circumstances, saw Jesus 
 at the right hand of God. That is a sure evidence that He is 
 alive y 
 
 It was on Tuesday evening, October 3, 1854, that she de- 
 parted to her rest. At six o'clock in the morning of that day, 
 she had sunk into a state of exhaustion so extreme as scarcely 
 to betray any signs of life. Observing the alarm this produced, 
 she rallied her feeble powers, and indicated her perfect con- 
 sciousness, and recognition of all around her. One of her son3 
 then took his position at the head of her bed, and as the Holy 
 Spirit aided his memory, repeated for three hours such passages 
 of Scripture as were appropriate to her solemn circumstances. 
 To nothing were her quick sensibihties more responsive than 
 this. The occasional elevation of her attenuated hand — the 
 heaven-cast glance of her dim eye — the soft whisper of her 
 faint voice indicated her felt preciousness of God's word, and 
 the support it was imparting to her soul, around which the deep 
 waters were now swelhng. Soon after, while another of her 
 sons was holding her hand, she raised them both, still retaining 
 his, and fixing her ej^es upon his face, with a look of the pro- 
 foundest solemnity and tenderness, pointed upward. The act 
 was too significant not to be understood. "Meet me in 
 heaven !" was her dying charge. And then, when her lips 
 were thought for ever sealed — lips that had testified so long and 
 so faithfully of Jesus — she exclaimed, with a voice of won- 
 drous energy and power, "A cloudless death! — a cloudless 
 death ! — a cloudless death !" So resplendent was the glory 
 now surrounding her — so sacred and awe-struck the feelings of 
 all who gazed upon the scene — the spot where the last conflict 
 was waging seemed more like the vestibule of heaven, than the 
 chamber of death. And now her oft urged prayer was an- 
 swered, her utmost wishes were fulfilled ; Jesus, "that very 
 same Jesus who once trod this earth, had come with the pale 
 messenger," lightening the dreary valley with His presence, 
 and manifesting Himself, as once He did to Stephen, as her 
 own risen, living Saviour, waiting to welcome her to her long- 
 wished-for home. While her gathered children were surround- 
 ing her dying bed, watching the closing scene, expecting eacli 
 moment to catch her last sigh, her eyes partly opened, her lips 
 moved, and with a low yet distinct voice, she rapidly repeated 
 the words, "I see Thee ! — I see Thee ! — I see Thee ! — I see 
 
THE CLOSIXn SCENE. 421 
 
 Thee !" The imeartlily grandeur of the scene transcends all 
 description. We felt that heaven was opened — that Christ 
 was there — that the eternal world enclosed us. 
 
 "What do you see, dearest Mamma? "The only reply was, 
 '■'- 1 see, Thee I — I see Thee! And as her voice grew fainter 
 and fainter, and the words died softly upon her lips, she ceased 
 to move — a holy quiet reigned — a solemn calm ensued — her 
 sanctified spirit was in the bosom of her Lord. 
 
 " The long yearnings of her heart Vv-ere still'd." 
 
 She lay like a conqueror — as more than conquerer she was 
 — surrounded with the spoils of victory. By the power of a 
 simple faith in a living Saviour, she had wrested the dart from 
 the King of Terrors on the confines of the eternal world, and 
 death was swallowed up in victory. Her countenance was 
 the image of repose — the sublime of tranquillity. No statue 
 from the master's hand was ever chiselled as were those fixed 
 and marble features. From the mental emotion, the soul-ecstasy 
 through which she had but just passed — wrapt in the vision of her 
 living Lord — there still lingered a lustre in the eye, a smile 
 upon the parted lips, and a glow, like that of sunset, upon the 
 countenance, which formed a picture of inimitable beauty and 
 grandeur. 
 
 " There lived no trace on that pale brow 
 
 Of wishes unfulfill'd ; 
 The only hope of answered prayer, 
 The calm of perfect peace, was there, 
 
 The saint's last sleep to gild ; 
 'Twere more than crime to mar a rest 
 So tranquil, so supremely blest." 
 
 Our work is nearly done. With a deep feeling of regret — 
 for the preparation of the last few pages of the volume has 
 rendered us quite unequal to the task — we relinquish a feature 
 which entered into the original plan of this Memoir, of present- 
 ing a minute analysis of the Christian character and experience 
 it has attempted to delineate. We trust, however, the reader 
 will have no difficulty in forming a just estimate of the princi- 
 pal characteristics of its subject, and of gleaning for himself 
 those practical lessons which may be learnt from the history 
 we have thus recorded. A few observations are all that we 
 can attempt in briefly suggesting those points which appear to 
 be worthy of especial study. 
 
422 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIXSLOW. 
 
 Constituted although she was by God with a mind of supe- 
 rior order, and possessing remarkable strength and decision 
 of character, great energy, and promptness of action, it yet 
 will not be her mental, so much as her spirituil endowments, 
 upon which the Christian reader will most delight to dwell. 
 The grace of our Lord was exceedingly abundant in her, with 
 faith and love. That grace, by the side of whose perennial 
 stream she perpetually dwelt, imparted inspiration to her 
 thoughts, a mould to her actions, and invested her whole habit 
 of life with a sanctity and charm indescribably impressive 
 and heavenly. None but those w^ho saw her in all the rela- 
 tions and phases of domestic and every-day life, can form an 
 adequate conception of the beautiful proportions and exquisite 
 symmetry of her Christian character and course. They alone 
 could testify how practical godliness was exhibited, not in fitful 
 and impulsive throes, but as a principle suffused over her 
 whole character, shedding everywhere the bloom and fragrance 
 of spiritual life — noiseless and uniform as the hght of day. 
 Reader, the same grace by which she was what she was, is 
 alike accessible to you. By this grace you may be assimilated 
 with the Divine will, may be transformed into the Divine 
 image, may be trained for active toil, or for passive endurance, 
 as was, in an eminent degree, her sacred privilege. Limit not 
 a Divine blessing so inexhaustible in its resources, and so free 
 in its bestowment ; but out of the Saviour's fulness receive 
 grace for grace, that in all things " the name of our Lord Jesus 
 may be glorified in you, and ye in Him, according to the 
 grace of our God and the Lord Jesus Christ." 
 
 Her power oi faith and prayer — the two distinctive features 
 of her Christianity — are suggestive of deep practical instruc 
 tion. Her faith was of the most simple character, and in its 
 simphcity may be found the secret of its mightiness. She Avas 
 " strong in faith, giving glory to God." She took Him at His 
 word, believing Him because He was God. This childlike, un- 
 questioning faith, purified her heart, sustained her under present 
 trial, enabled her to triumph over things seen, and brought eter- 
 nal realities vividly and constantly before her mind. Her faith 
 honoured God by believing, and God honoured her faith by be- 
 stowing. With this vigorous grace of feith, was naturally con- 
 nected great power in prayer. She cherished the most exalteJ 
 views of the prevalence of prayer with God. With this weapon, 
 wielded by the arm of faith, she felt nothing was too difficult 
 
COXCLUDIXG REMARKS. 4'^ > 
 
 of accomplishment, since with God all things were possible. 
 She was a woman imgldy in inayer. Apart from all figure of 
 speech, and without any exaggerated conception of the idea, 
 it might be said, she literally " walked with God." She 
 seemed to live, and move, and have her being in fellowship and 
 communion with the Invisible. Her habit was, — be the errand 
 trivial or momentous, — to use her own simple and expressive 
 language, a continuous "going and telling Jesus." She remem- 
 bered his own words, "Without me ye can do nothmg^''^ and 
 so she lived, as a little child, upon His guardian, incessant 
 care. The closeness of her walk, and the holy familiarity of 
 her intercourse with God may astonish some, but so it was. 
 She seemed to have her home in His very heart, and thus to 
 have penetrated its infinite depths, and to have unveiled its 
 hidden love to an extent startling to those whose transactions 
 with God are distant, cold, and unfrequent. God was all in 
 all to her. No. thought nor wish, no want nor plan, did she 
 cherish or devise, with which His counsel and glory were not 
 sought. " The Lord direct," was always the calm, submissive 
 response to every question of doubt and perplexity. In this 
 impressive feature of her Christian hfe, how powerfully does 
 she speak ! Could her living voice now be heard addressing 
 each tried reader of this volume, with w^hat earnestness of man- 
 ner, and persuasiveness of tone, would she still say, — " Go, 
 
 AND TELL JeSUS." 
 
 How forcibh^ do these pages illustrate the essential relation 
 of strong faith, full assurance of hope, and elevated rapture of 
 pious feeling, with profound humility of heart, and an almost 
 entire negation of self! "When Isaiah, in the heavenly vision, 
 " saw the Lord sitting upon a throne, high and lifted up, and 
 His train filling the temple," and heard the seraphim cry, 
 " Holy, holy, holy is the Lord of hosts ! " overwhelmed by the 
 glory of the Lord, he exclaimed, "Woe is me, for I am undone ; 
 because I am a man of unclean lips ! " And wlien the be- 
 liever obtains a near view of the " glory of God in the face 
 of Jesus Christ," he, too, falls prostrate at His feet, lost in a 
 sense of His vileness. It is in the light of the Divine coun- 
 tenance the exceeding sinfulness of sin is seen, and seen but to 
 whelm the soul in self-abhorrence. Before the deepening 
 glory of Christ, the glory of self pales, as the morning star 
 retires before the ascending sun. The closer the acquaintance 
 with Jesus, and the strons-er the assurance of Divine forgive- 
 
424 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WIN.SLO^.V. 
 
 ness, the more softly and lowlily will tlie spirit walk with God. 
 " There is forgiveness with Thee, that Thou mayest he feared ^ 
 As the vessel more heavily laden sinks deeper into the water, 
 so the soul, the more that it is filled with Divine grace, sinks 
 the lowest into self-annihilation. Almost painfully humiliating, 
 at times, were her views and expressions of herself; and 3'et, 
 in the deepest, gloomiest vale of soul-humihation which she 
 trod, she appeared never to lose sight of her completeness in 
 Christ. Her 5eZ/'-denial never betrayed her into ^mce-denial. 
 
 Let the ividow's desolate heart be cheered as she reads these 
 pages. They are the records of one who, perhaps, like her- 
 self, was early bereft of the husband of her youth, and left to 
 tread the remainder of life's journey in lonely widowhood, and, 
 single-handed, to rear a family for God. Did that God, the 
 widow's God, forsake her? Did any single promise of His 
 word, upon which He caused her soul to hope, fail ? Did He, 
 as a God of providence, or as a God of grace, betray the con- 
 fidence He asked, disappoint the trust he invited, or leave un- 
 healed the wound, unsoothed the sorrow, unaided the burden, 
 His own hands had made ? No ; not in a solitary instance. 
 Then, all that He has been, He still is, and ever will be — the 
 God of the widow who putteth her trust in Him. 
 
 The aged Christian., too, will gather much to encourage her 
 heart and strengthen her hands in God from the life under re- 
 view. A saint of God, closing her pilgrimage of toil and con- 
 flict, in her eighty first year, bears her dying testimony, that 
 His aged ones are the especial objects of His loving, tender, 
 faithful care. Lean in all the decrepitude of years, in all the 
 weakness, pain, and tremulousness of advanced age, in all the 
 fears, misgivings, and becloudings of life's close, upon this Di- 
 vine rod and staff. Now that thou art old and grey-headed, 
 thy God will not forsake thee. Rest in the faithfulness of 
 God, lean upon the finished work of Jesus, and hope on for 
 the glory so soon to be revealed. Let thy believing ])raycr 
 be, " Cast me not off in the time of old age ; forsake me not 
 when my strength faileth." And God's faithful answer will 
 be, "Even to your old age I am He; and even to hoar hairs 
 will I carry you." 
 
 How great the power and charm of a holy life ! Such is 
 the lesson these pages impressively teach. The world is replete 
 with beauty. There is beauty in nature, and beauty in art, 
 and beauty in coimtless forms ; but there is no beauty like 
 
COXCLUDIXd REMARKS. 425 
 
 " the heauty of holiness^ The brightness which gleams through 
 a good man's Hfe outshines the sun in its meridian splendour. 
 The world, too, is mightj in its forces. There is the power of 
 intellect, and the power of learning, and the power of genius, 
 and the power of wealth, and the power of rank ; but there is 
 no power so commanding and so effective as the power of holi- 
 ness. The power it wields is omnipotent for the achievement 
 of good. And a more precious and enduring legacy parental 
 affluence and affection cannot bequeath to posterity, than the 
 record of a life traced bj the sanctifying influence of faith, the 
 achievements of prayer, and the adornments of holiness. Such 
 a life is a living demonstration of the Divinity of the Bible, 
 and does more to confirm its veracity, and spread its truths 
 through the world, than all that has ever been spoken or writ- 
 ten on the evidences of Christianity. 
 
 How measureless the loss of such a saint of God ! To her 
 family and friends, to the church of Christ and the world, the 
 withdrawal for ever from earth of her living piety and fervent 
 prayers, her holy conversation and consistent example, is a 
 serious and far-reaching calamity. And yet she still hves 
 amongst us, not in our hearts and memories only, but in the 
 undying influence of her holy life. " The righteous shall be 
 had in everlasting remembrance." The grave hides them from 
 sight, but not from memory. Neither the green turf nor the 
 salt wave can bury the still surviving, and still moulding recob 
 lections of the holy dead. In the embalmed remembrance of 
 their graces, their prayers, and their actions, they still live to 
 guide, to stimulate, and cheer us in our homeward march. 
 Nor do we cease to live with them ! They remember and 
 love us still. Bearing their friendships with them to the skies, 
 purified, subhmated, and enlarged, they yet think of us, vearn 
 over us, and long to have us with them there, with a tender- 
 ness of interest, and an intensity of affection, such as thev 
 never felt on earth. For aught that we know, they still hover 
 arovmd our persons, encompassing our path to the abodes of 
 bhss. Angels are ministering agents to the heirs of salvation ; 
 and may we not suppose that many of the glorified spirits of 
 "just men made perfect" are clothed with a like embassv ? 
 " They serve Him day and night in His temple ; " and who 
 will say that it does not enter essentially into that service for 
 the Lord, to administer in some unknown way to their former 
 companions in tribulation, and the expectant sharers of their 
 
426 MEMOIR OF MRS. MARY WINSLOW. 
 
 gloiy? But until we rejoin them in the home of the Father, 
 we should think of them but to follow their holy example, to 
 gather encouragement from their faith and patience, to learn 
 lessons from their failings, and to take up and carry forward 
 the work of the Lord, which dropped from their dying hands, 
 until we, too, are summoned to rest from our labours, and re- 
 ceive our reward. 
 
 Such is her happiness, whose sacred memorials we close. 
 She has reached, at last, the heaven of glory, for which her 
 panting thoughts and heaving heart so yearned. She has 
 looked upon Christ, whom her soul adored with an affection so 
 a1)sorbing and intense — has seen angels, and talked with those 
 she once knew and loved below. And now she feels that all 
 indeed is true ! Mysteries which the hoary sages of antiquity 
 should never know, — glories which the human eye could never 
 see, — joys which human thought could never conceive, — and 
 music such as earth never heard, have burst upon her wonder- 
 ing, blissful spirit. At His feet, who died for her, and who 
 rose again, adoringly she casts her crown, exclaiming, "Wor- 
 thy IS THE Lamb ! " Ascribing to the Triune Jehovah — as 
 we now devoutly do — the praise and the glory of all that she 
 was, as a partaker of life in Jesus, we will rejoice that, 
 through His sovereign grace, she " fought a good fight, finished 
 her course, kept the faith ; " and that now — 
 
 She is gone to the mountain of myrrh, and to the 
 
 HILL OF frankincense, UNTIL THE DAY BREAK, AND THE 
 SHADOWS FLEE AWAY. 
 
 THE END.