f '^ •^ (^ u ^ \ 'je Book — The conflict — The muddy stream — Ood in littlo tlungs — Forget-me-not — Self- examination — Watchfulness — " Bible enough'"— Ragged-school — The earthly bouse— " Balancings of. the clouds" — Return to Tor- quay 100 CHAPTER IX. The "highest attainment" — Another conversion — "In the world again" — A pervert — A Personal Christ and a personal devil — Cross-bearing — Discipline, its aim — Closer intimacy with God — "Eccentric philantlirophy" — Home-affections — The earthen ves- sel — The earnest— " Cannot be agitated" — A snare — The look — Working — The "talents" — "Dashing on the rock"^I'ayson — Ridley — A longing — Not Christianity, but Christ— The "meet- ing-place" — Wilderness-lessons — A communion — "This do" — A retrospect — Final leave of Torquay 117 CHAPTER X. Diary — "Not streams, but wells" — Letter-writing— A test — Mar- liage — The "fatal calm" — "Ripen for glory" — "Senses exer- cised" — The primitive taste— Spirit breathing through us — Genial affections — Self-reproach — The Magnet — "A bettor com- munion" — "Treasures in heaven" — A bereavement — "An eter- nal present" — Meditation — Grace and sin — A gourd withered — "Expect" — Impotence and Omnipotence — "Playing with flowers"— Habakkuk — David — " Live upon God" — Self-sacrlfico — " Money, money !" — " Ourselves" — The love-token — Christmas thonghts 1-lS CONTENTS. CHAPTER XI. PAOI Work on Cftntlclcs— The press—" SUshtlng the "Word"— Gliding the pathway— A birthday wish— "Xcarinc: the port"— "Viva- clous self-intcrost"— The thorns -" Dacis"— The furnace-" Only two men" — The Father's eye— Thankfulness— "Tides of love"— Cbri-;t for us — The two tliinjjs- Hor church — "My baseness" — Kmblttcrlng the world— "The earthly hut"— The Evil One— Kellgious dissipation — "My leanness" — Christ and bodily tired- ness — The three vl>itors — A Tuscan prison - Sealinc and witness- Inft — Unbelief and humility—" Our own clay" — Haifa Saviour — "That brink" — Christ leadlnq; the praises - Outward adorning — Clothed with iniinortality- Tinging of the dark cloud — Jesus a personal Friend — " The balm ' 168 CHAPTER XII, The daily resurrection — Mental trials and bodily— Another conver- sion — The heliotrope— "Seeing Jesus" — "Looking on lllm" — "Handling" Him— "^fearer to Thee"- The blood— "Do all for Christ"- Infancy of the heart- Christ in His risht jilace— "The Church and the Churches" — Manifold discipline— Her bonk blest — Hours at the Throne — Strength revived — TVit- lesson — Hebrews — Guidance — "One indulged sin" — Sanctiflcation — Bright side of tbo cloud— Diary — Lowering lessons — "Covered with Jesus"— Battle-Held 185 CHAPTER XIII. The ftjmlly-anectlons — Christ and Antichrist — Her father's last Ill- ness— "Cried myself to sleep" — Diary — Fruit ripe — Insensibility — " Falnteth not" — " But one sting" — " Wc shall meet again" — Polishing other side of the stone — Occupy to-day— Anticipations — Closing scene — " All Joy" — "Go np" — Kesurrection — Recogni- tion — "Jesus wept" — "Come forth'" — Unclothed state — At home In the body — Absent from It — " Clothed upon"— Left behind — Uppcrmoa*. feeling — Adoration — " Hajipy In his happiness" 10$ C; O N T K X T 3 . XI CHAPTER XIV. PAUB School of aflBlctlon — Now lessons — Isolation and desolation — Christ's body — The " daylight" — Diary— Breathings — " Glory" — Eivcr's brinlc and river's side — A retrospect — The waves and the haven — "A thorough pilgrim" — " Not satisfied" — The "higher occupa- tion" — Satan's method of temptation — "Fighting in Canaan" — The burnt-offering — Visits — "Each moment's need" — "Not un- derstood" — Suffering and service — "Strengthening to carry the cross" — The worm at the root — Restraining grace — Study of Hebrew — Sanctifying wealth — A "weight" — "Sensitive to sin" — "Better home" — Future recognition — "Shut up to Jesus" — The oak and the storm 210 CHAPTER XV. Kitualism — "Outside things" — "Visiting the people" — High- Churchism — "My notions of the Church" — Only true value of life — Henry Martyn, at Calcutta and at Dinapore — Congenial home — The eternal day — Braincrd — God, not self—" Never wearies of me" — "No silent moments" — "Turn your bed" — Sick-room — The reward — Luther — Atonement — The " living sacrifice" — ^The fashioning of the " mystical body" — Infancy and manhood — Per- son of Christ — Answer to prayer, why delayed^" Within three days" — The ravens — The "bruising" and tho " darkness" — The "sacrifice" and the "burning lamp" — The misty atmosphere — Tho lambs and the sheep-" Dread not" 229 CHAPTER XVI. Portrait — Bible In hand — "Absorbed in God"— Strong Conflicts — Mental habitude — Diary — Tho orange -tree — Life a business — " Joy of the Lord" — The preparation — Krummacher — " The holy dove'" — "Purging the floor" — The "two rests" — Unuttered groaning?— Prophetic study — Tho "conflict in the land" — The " garment of praise" — The " waves" — " It is I " — Waiting — Evans — Hewitson — Intercession — " Unripe fruit"— The valley — Health stationary — The Spirit and the flesh — Secret of usefulness Ten- derness and hardness — Earnest labour 24T jnl C O X T K .V T 3 . CHAPTER XVII. PAGI " A real Btratagem" — Tho child and Iho dojr — Glimpses through the lattice— '• A pasp of His hand" — Soft wliispers — The shell and the kernel — "An uncertain sound' — " Conio up hi;:hei" — "Tender papes"— Watch! -The narrow wny — Infidelity — Sinai- tic inscriptions — The buds and the fruit — Memoirs — The un clouded sunshine — Bodily depression — The white hyacinth — "Solitariness" — A "beloved Persis" — Maturing experiences — Intimacy with Jesus — The " wheel full of iron spikes" — The now wine of the kingdom — Melchizedec— The Man of Soitows — Re- surrection — Ever-varying tiilos — " Tiaitor-like character" — The blind children — " Wailing upon God" — Bible's adaptedness — A cure for " wretched spirits" — Ripened Christians 266 CHAPTER XVIII. Augustine — The Bible — A glimpse Into her chamber — The bee— The exotic — " Sharpness" — " Perfect through sufferings" — " A little while"—" Brilliantly happy"— The Jew— Egypt— Sinaitlc inscriptions — TlieroglyphUs— Alphabet— Researches — " Harbour In sight" — God's iinniensitj- — Permisslc^n of evil — Prayer, " set speaking" and "silent breathing"— Martin Luther — Thankful- ness — vralching for souls — New sorrows and new joys — Aged Christians — Subduedncss — Satanic agency— The two ends — Oil- painting — Consecrated to God — Strokes upon the stones — The "south wind" — "Beg yourselves rich"— Self-possessedness — Light of alBictlon'8 fire—" All known to Thee ' 2?1 CHAPTER XIX. The shell — Its native sea — Land of Bculah— Breaks in communion —Robert Bolton—" When shall I be dissolved ?"— " Exalted"— " Going to be with Him" — Pilgrim experiences—" Momentary catches''— " A time-state"— The "perfect"- 1 'ps and downs— The four wings— Self-sacriflce— The flame— The "house-devir* exorcised— Soul-nakedness— Apathy— Foretastes-Emma Maur- ice—" Stdf-crushcd"— Increasing weakness— " Singing for Jesus'' —Enoch— Tlio pilgrim— Looking back— "Exalted above meas- ure"— Faith and Conception— Bishop Ridley—" Ileaveu of com- munion"— David's life— The Potter's field— The spiritual body— The Lord's appearing J108 CONTENTS. Xlll CHAPTER XX. PAfll Bpenser— The " dark cottage"— "New light" — "Now come I to thee"— " Pity thyself"— The vails — Kuffled spirit — External ease — Diary — Visits — Work on Hebrews — Energy of purpose — " I owe it so much''— "What sin is' — " My face on the ground" — Sympathies — Jobs three friends — Longings — "Downright stag- gered" — The Great-hearts — "Heaven's own bliss" — David — The Psalms — "No other path" — "The provocation" — "Continued with me" — Cowper— Contemplation — The eagle-pinion — Caleb — "God'sjoy" — Anticipated evil — " The Nazarite" — New discipline — Christian love — " Godliness " — Sin of unbelief — " Useless grief" — " Sonship-positioii" — God in sufl'orings — Renewed elasticity — A glimpse into the sick-chamber — " Maturing for removal" 818 CHAPTER XXI. ' Heaven begun" — Payson — Celestial city in view — " Most of me fled'' — Diary — Labours — " Mastering death" — A message — God's pleasures — "Sinking into Christ" — Jesus prays — The bright cloud — The unchanging Priest — " Deep waters" — " Spoken for to God" — " Feeling the bottom" — God unchanged — Mists — Brightened — " Verifying my experience by the Word" — Work on Hebrews — Irish Missions — Christ "showing Himself" — "Sim- ple faith' — Prostrated — "All bright yonder" — "The grand whole" — A farewell — " Foundation-realities" — " llemembering Him in the night-watches" — Legh Richmond — Silent fortnight — "Looking heaven" — "Rock -like peace" — Payson — "Praise waiteth" — "Higher up" — A parting gift — "Never mind' — Rev. A. Dallas — The silent tear — " I tcill get up" — Heavenly peace — Dismissal — Polycarp — Living martyrdom — " Sweetest Canticle" —The Epitaph 84) 2 CHAPTER I. " I LONG SO earnestly to be growing in grace hour- ly—* filled with the Spirit'— burning with love tc Clirist, and Christians, and sinners — to be a rcflectio]\ of Him in the world, and working whilst it is day." So wrote, on one occasion, the beloved disciple whose brief but bright course we are now to sketch. That aspiration was the key-note of her life. It is fabled by an ancient poet, that, " when Her- cules went to unbind Prometheus (a figurative per- sonification of human nature), he sailed the length of the groat ocean in an earthen pot, or pitcher." And Lord Bacon, applying the fable to the Christian lite, describes the saint as sailing most marvellously in the frail bark of the flesh, through the waves of the world, to tliat home where he shall be "free indeed." It was emphatically a frail bark and a stormy ocean which carried Adelaide Newton to her haven. And others who are still on that ocean, " toiling in rowing," may be comforted mightily as they hear the articulate voice of Him who so often came to her, saying, " It is I ; be not afraid." The town of Derby cannot boast of many holy memories. But He who noted Bethany as " the 16 MEMOIR OF A. L. NEWTOJT. I own of Mary and of her sister Martlia," has noted the birthplace of Adelaide Leaper Newton. It was on 1st March, 1824, that an infant, who was to leave behind her so precious a fragrance, was ushered into this vale of tears. " Life," it has been said, " Beginneth as a little path edged with the violet and prim- rose, A litllo path of lawny grass, and soft to tiny feet." To Adelaide Newton, life's early years were eminently smooth and pleasant. Of a good family, and sur- rounded by every earthly luxury, she gi'ew up into girlhood, her sunny morning betokening a cloudless day. " This sweet spot," we tind her writing to a friend, on her return home after a short absence, " seems like an earthly paradise." And a singular aptness in acquiring each accomplishment to which she successively devoted herself, threatened, as she rose into womanhood, to entangle her still more firmly in the world's meshes. A surviving sister speaks of " her peculiarly sweet touch in playing, and voice in singing," which " made her music unusually attractive." Her delicate pencil, too, seemed to maik her out for no ordinary success in drawing. And graver attainments were added. "A natural talent for languages" found its development in the acquisi- tion of vaiious of the modern tongues; and, in later years, she added to them Greek, Hebrew, and even a little Arabic. She " i)articularly delighted also in mathomatics." And wlien, added to all tlii^, was tho EARLY I0Y6. 17 idornmeiit of a "cliarminij iiiannev," whose ejraceful iiodcsty was " never for an instant spoiled by tlio Draises which were continually heaped npon her in he social circle," it will be seen that seldom has the world held out a more attractive allurement than to the subject of our Memoir. '' Like yourself," she wiites, long afterwards to a <*chool-companion, describing that season of her early joys, " mv heart naturally clung very much to the world. Music was my great snare. I took infinite pains to play well, and delighted secretly in the com- mendation I got whenever I played before any one. Fancy now its being nearly four years since I have touched either piano or organ. And my singiiig, which I had once even more reason to be satisfied with, is probably for ever silenced. You cannot think how I thank God from luy heart that Ho would not let me gratify the secret pride wiiicli was lurking in it, and which was stealing my love from Him." Henry Martyn tells, that, in his student-days, when self and self-pleasing was as yet the centre of his soul, he contrived to pronounce hiinse.f "a reli gious man." Adelaide Newton, also, had, for many days, inscribed her name in the same bede-roll. A child of parents who loved the Lord, scarcely liad she known the time wlien the "things of tlio kingdom" were strangers to her ear. " Pleasant as it was," writes her governess, " to teach her in the school-room, it was still more so to be vvith her at the season for spiiitual instruction, She always appeared to enjoy those opportunities • 2* 18 MEMOIR OF A. L. NEWTON. and on one occasion I remember she said, ' Tiiatik you, I shall now go to sleep on the RocV of Ages.' " And, as years went on, the " reli^riousness" bad grown more intense. " On one occasion," says, her sister, "in 1835, when Mr. Grev-ille was here 1 »r a few days, much that he said, both in the farailv and to herself, deeply impressed her. And I well rei, em- ber how, about that time, we were constantly ref. ling Doddridge's ' Rise and Progress,' Fletcher's 'Add'C-ss,' and James' 'Anxious Inquirer.' " And in the fo'^.ow- ing summer the "religiousness" assumed a still d. rpcr hue. The family had remo\-ed for a few montrs to a neighbouring village, to escape the small-pox winch had seized virulently a member of the houser.old. In an unfurnished attic of the house, Adelaide, and three others, used to spend — each unknown to the rest — many solitary hours in "devotional readmg and in prayer." And the family governess writes : "From the beginning of 1837 to the end of 1839, I liad a daily course of private Bible-reading and prayer with dear Adelaide at her own particular re- quest." But the " religiousness " did not give her rest. " I am the victim," we find her writing, " of the most distressing and pairful contlict. Sometimes I feel ready to give myself up almost to despair, while at other times I seem to enjoy religion. When I look back ujx)n the time when I think this conflict first began in me (which I believe is now six or seven vears ago), I am tempted to believe that it is quit« EARLY STRUGGLES. 19 impossible that one who has triflerl so long mth such things, sinning Against such light and knowledge as I enjoy, shall ever be forgiven." And again: "I am so careless, and so unwilling to pray. Pray earnestly for me, and write faithfully to me. It will not be a small thing to deceive myself on so all-im- portant a subject." And some years afterwards, referring to this period, she writes: "I can perfectly enter into all your feelincrs, because I have been in much the same state of mind myself. I was not happy in the world, and could not be, for there is nothing in it which can satisfy an immortal creature. I had no real enjoy- ment in anything, because I was trying to serve two masters. And this, I now see, cannot be : God will have the whole heart : His pi'omise is, that we shall find Him when we search for Him with all our hearts." And again, to the same friend : " I have often thought of you since you once wrote me a note say- ing you could serve God only as a duty. If this is still your feeling, I can assure you from my own ex- perience, that it is only because your heart is not given up entirely to God. You are trying, as I too long did, to serve God and Mammon; and therefore you find no true enjoyment either in the world or in rehgioTi. I know exactly how you feel, having had j)recisely the same conflict going on in my heart for a long tmie." "Out of about 365 religions in the world," said « hio-hlv-educated .Jew oue dav to his beloved chili. 20 M E M O I n OF A . L . N K W T O X . fin accomplished and lovely girl of nineteen, as she was urjjing upon him the wonderful graciousness of tliat Divine Saviour wliom she had found in the cruci- fied Nazarene, "I don't think your's the easiest; people have to work so hard, and be so distressingly earnest, and so awfully solemn ; it makes me ill to think of it." "Ah!" replied the youthful convert, " this religion is a very happy and a very easy one. I have an inward peace and joy which is unspeak- able. Jesus is precious ; He is Heaven ; He blesses me every moment. Oh ! his boundless love to me !" Adelaide Newton had not yet found Him who was Leila Ada's all. " It is the constant life," says she, "of watchfulness and self-denial required of the Christian which fills me with despair." Her con- science not yet sprinkled with " the blood,'' she was without a leverage to move her to willing service. Her heart, not yet attached to the Lord Jesus, was not, and could not be, detached from a world " lying in the wicked one." A new expedient was now attempted. " I did so much wish to see you," she writes, on the 27th April 1839. "You know that I have at times been very anxious about the state of my mind. Many indeed are the convictions God has most gra- ciously granted me ; but they have been rejected and slighted. All this winter, however, I have been very raucli depressed in spirit, and at times quite miser- able. Wht-n J was staying with us, she slept with ni''. We often talked indirectly on religious subjects; but one night we got nearer and nearer THK NEW EXPEDIENT. 21 home, till it ended in my opening my whole heart to lier. This was no sooner done than I felt a burden taken oft' my mind, which has been weighing mo down fbi months. She gave me most precious ad- vice. I liad never spoken freely to any one before ; and you may imagine what a relief it was. O pray for me ! I trust God is bringing me by a way I kn^ )W not." And again, to another: "There is something with- in which keeps me from enjoying perfect peace. If I could once be sure that I am jvietitied, then all would be right. I wish, more and more, every day, to see some clergyman who would tell me what ho thought of me. Still, I can hardly think that God would liave brought me so far to put me to shame." But a brighter hope was now to dawn. " If," says Cowper, of the condemned felon, who, "in darknesa and heart-chilling fears," hears the warder at his cell- door, about to lead him forth to death, " If then, just theu, all thoughts of mercy lost, When hope, long lingering, at last yields the irl'oat, The sound of pardon pierce his startled car, He drops at once his fetters and his fear; And transport glows in all he looks and speatp. And tlie first thankful tears bedew his cheaka," A.ud the poet adds : Jo)', far superior joy, which much outweighi Tlie comfort of a few poor added days, Invades, jiossesses, and o'erwlieims the soul Of him wliom hope has. witli a touch, mndo ••icla 22 M E M O I U OF A . L . NEWTON. Tis heaven, nil heaven, descending on tlie wings Of the glad legions of tlie King of kings. 'Tie more — 'tis God diffused through every part; 'Tis God Himself triumphant in his heart." The bard of Olaey himself knew little of this joy, but Adelaide Newton was now to realize it as her own. One morning, at Leylands, at family worship, a visitor* read the third chapter of Colossians. Select- ing the first verse — ''If ye, then, be lisen with Christ," he spoke emphatically of the " If^" — urging the necessity of make sure of this starting point, setting forth Clinst and His resurrection-life as the sinner's immediate privilege, and closing with an appeal on the duty of instant decision for Christ. The message went straight to Adelaide's heart. '* The words," says her sister, " were used efieo- tually by the Holy Spirit to decide her to be the Lord's." When Jesus was on earth, the needy " drew near to Him,*^ and found in Him immediate life. Adelaide Newton "drew near" to tlie same Saviour, and found the same immediate life. ]3efore, she had gone with her burden to the creatui'c ; but the creature could not solace. Now she went direct to Jesus Himself, and she was "accepted in the Beloved." " This," we find her writing, "is the only way to life and salva- tion — ' Come, and see Jesus.' This is the way to settle all objections. We may have a thousand diffi- • The Rev. Dr. H. M'Neile. T U £ R I S I S . 23 culties in our minds ; but, by coming to Christ, to see Him for ourselves, tliey all vanish away." Brainerd, in his Diary, contrasting his religious- ness with his godliness, writes of the former thus : " The more I did in duty, the more hard I thought it would be for God to cast mc off. But now I see that my duties laid not the least obli- gation upon God to bestow His grace uj)on me. I see evidently that the whole Avas nothing but self- worship." And of the latter ho writes : " It was the appre- hension of a divine glory. God brought me to a hearty disposition to exalt Him, and to set Him upon the throne. I was sweetly composed. I felt myself in a new world. I wondered that all the Avorld did not see and comply witli this way of salvation, en- tirely by the righteousness of Christ.'''' Adelaide Newton was carried through a like ex- perience. The "annihilation of her religious self she had found " a bitter work." That work, though in some sense a life-long discipline, was now so far done, that, for the first time, she could say, " Not I, but Christ." And, like Brainerd, she felt an indescri- bable repose. " It is impossible," she writes, " to de- scribe what a sight of Christ is. One man cannot tell another. Every one must see for himself. It is perfectly irresistible. And there is something trans- forming in the veiy act of beholding Jesus. It is the Boal's highest joy." CHAPTER 11. One day Henry Martyn wrote in his Diary : "My soul approves tboroiighly the life of God ; and my one only desire is, to be entirely devoted to Him. I have resigned, in profession, the riches, the honours, and the comforts of this world ; and I think, also, it is a resignation of the heart." With Adelaide Newton, also, it was "a resignation of the heart." " ' Whose am I V " she writes, allud- ing to Paul's words that night in the ship : "Why is it that so few, so very few, can at once answer, ' I am thy servant, O Lord V There is no sin more hateful to Christ than lukewarmness. And yet how n)any thousands are victims of it in the present day ! What numbers are spoken of as ' well-inclined,' oi • well-disposed,' young persons, liking to be thought well of by the Lord's people, and yet shrinking fronv lliat 'coming out' from the world and being 'sepa- r;.to,' which alone could enable them conscientiously to affirm, as in the sight of God, ' I am thine.' " " Every one living," she proceeds, " must be Satan's slave or God's child. What an alternative ! Surely those who continue in this uncertainty have never •;''ii N Relieved fiom lior biink'Ti, and lifaring in her hand " the roll," she now with a light heart ascended the hill Difficulty. "Tlicre is blessedness unutter- able," she writes, in true fixedness of heart upon God. It enables a soul to 'sing and give praise' (Ps. Ivii, 7), even amidst dangers and calamities and reproaches." In casting in her lot with Clirist, she had not omitted to count the cost. " One day, Lady L S was asking a mutual fnend about us," we find her writing some time previous ; " and she heard that we were not decided enough to be happy. Iler simple reply was, 'Oh, tell them from me not to be halt-and-half.' You cannot thiiik how those words haunted me ever afterwards, ami how often they have helped me to be out-and-out a Christian in my conduct." The "soul that loveth," has been compared to (ho "Pale geranium, pont within tlie cottage-window." " Behold," says the poet, "How yearningly it stretchetli to the light its leaves! How ptraineth upward to the sun, coveting its sweet influences! How real a living sacrifice to the god of all its wor- ship!" Such was Adelaide Newtcn. Fixing her heart on her beloved Lord, she was transformed into "a Yning sacrifice." " We read," she writes, " of ' many men of l^enjamin and Jmlah,' who came to join them- selves to David. And how did they proclaim their THE CHRISTIAN I ^f THE WOULD. 2'7 true-heartodness ? By flieir entire self-surrender: ' Thine we are, David ; and on tliy side, thou son of Jesse !' " Surrounded by not a little to attract the carnal eye, she "chose the better part," and chose it onco for all. " What I long for most," she writes, " is an habitual and realizing sense of the presence of God at all tinies, and the constant recollection that His eye is upon me, and that nothing, however trivial I may think it, can escape His observation. May it be our experience daily more and more, so that we may grow in conformity to the image of Christ and in meetness for our heavenly inheritance !" Like the " man in the picture," she had not only " the world behind her back," but the " crown of glory hanging over her head." " Every fresh dcvel- tipuient," she writes, "of the fruits of the Spirit in our hearts is fresh treasuie for 'the Lord of the har- vest.' Oh ! did Ave but remember this, in what a difterent light would all the events of time appear to us ! In every friendship we form, in every visit we pay, in every letter we write, we are either sowing to the flesh — of the flesh to reap corruption, or sowing to the Spirit — of the Spirit to reap life everla.stinf>-! How this ought to quicken us to use our moments in sowing seed for our eternal harvest !" In aa age like the present, when " the form of godliness " is so rife, and its " power " so very rare, it is not wonderful that a sensitive heart like hera should early have been called to solve various prob- lems in the daily life. 28 M i: M O I U OF A . L . N E W . O N . One of those proMcnis was "the course to he pur- sued in regard to worldly societj'." Writing to a friend who had solicited her judgment, she says : — " I scarcely think it possible to draw the line too strongly between light and darkness. "We cannot be real Christians only in private. It is written, ' By their fruits ye shall know them ;' and if we are re;dly following God devotedly, it will be evident to Jill around us. Let me, therefore, entreat you at once to resolve to make up your mind to devote yourself entirely, soul and body, to Him, I know you never can be really happy till you do." Tersteegen speaks of " love exercising self-denial without tasting its bitterness, and almost without ever thinking of it." One of Adelaide's sisters, who had been absent from home, writes: "I shall never for- get the impression she made on me by the intense feeling she put into Gal. vi. 14, which was the first text she quoted as soon as we w-ere alone together ; and from that time I saw that the world was cruci- fied to her in a way I had never seen it before." And she herself writes: "The nearer we live to Jesus, and the closer our walk is witli Him, the less inclination we have for pursuits and pleasures in which He is not the object." Many Christians seem only half-reconciled, and therefore only half-separated unto God. Dear Ade- laide felt at home in her Father's house ; and that made her feel a "stranger" in a world which knows not the Father. " Oh ! for a heart," some one baa said, TV I K N I N r, C II E K n F IT L N E S S . 29 " Magnanimous to know Thy worth, poor workl, and let thee gol" Such a heart Adelaide had gotten at Golgotha, and it cost her scarcely a pang to "let go" whatever had been most dear. "I can not help thinking," she writes to a schoolfellow, "that, if you are much occupied with thoughts of heaven, of holiness, of the meek and lowly Jesus, and how He lived and walked on earth, you will feel a secret shrinking from wordly society, which will make balls, e to be with Him for ever." '•'■May 1. — Saw Mrs. II., and read her John iii. ; but I fear she depends on supposed innocency of life for acceptance with God. May God open her eyes to see her danger ! Oh ! that slie may yet be brought into the fold of Christ, and be made His for ever !" "1845. April 9. — Went to see E. E. ; but her spirit had taken its flight that morning. She knew she Avas dying, and on the Tuesday desired her mother to give 'her best love to Miss N., for she should never see me again ;' and in the evening she asked her to take her a candle, and hold it by her while she read my hymn on 'The ]<\i]ness of Jesus.' She also spoke very seriously to her sister S., though the room was full. In the aftei-noon, while her mother was sitting alone with her, she said, ' OIi ! mother, can't you hear it ? It is so beautiful !' After listening for some minutes, she said, with her arms stretched out, ' I'm sure Jesus sent those blessed angels to comfort me.' She also said, when asked if she felt afraid to die, ' No, I'm not afraid ; the sting of death is quite taken away.' She was sensible to the last, and died peacefully." D I A R T . 39 "1846. Jamiary 23, — Spoke to B. of neglecting salvation till avc are sick and dying ; he was quite atlected to tears, and wept some time. lie seemcJ quite cheered when I spoke to him of the precious blood of Jesus." "■ February 23. — Spoke faitlifully to Mrs. D. about her husband, and urged her, instead of trying to talk to him, to talk to God about him." '■'■March 10. — Saw M. W., who had been taken ill oil AVediiesday. She said she had often wondered if her religion would support her in illness and death ; and it did. The woild had never been much to her. She was always afraid of having too mucli, lest it should draw off her aftections from God ; but now it seemed utterly nothing. She said she felt as if stand- ing on the outside of it. She had perhaps led as upright a life outwardly as was possible, exercising always a conscience void of oftence ; but if any ono should suggest that as a ground of acceptance, she spurned the thought. She would consider every- thing in that liglit as ' lighter than a feather to waft her across the ocean.' " It was thus that dear Adelaide went about, like the Master, from day to day, " the common people hearing her gladly." " I would never," we find her wnting, in her diary, at the beginning of 1846, "enter a house without having first asked His blessing — ■ never go to the district without prayer, and i)rayer especially for a blessing on the books lent." And this other entry : " The time is short ; work while it '= ^'ay ; the Lord is at hand : occupy till I come." 40 MEMOIR OF A . L . NEWTON. Her sickle preserved its fine edi^^e; aii.l that made her so successful a reaper in His fields. And the sickles of other reapers she sought to sharpen. "'Who hath beheved our report?'" she writes, in a pointed ajipeal, widely circulated in various parts of England, " is the sad inquiry of the minister, the teacher, and every one who laboui-s to win souls to Christ. Let us, therefore, put the pro- raise of our God to the proof, and see if He will not open the windows of heaven, and pour us out a bless- ing that there shall not be room enough to receive it. True, we need self-denial and resolute effort, to get even time for prayer ; and we must endure some conflict with Satan and self, ere we are enabled to continue in prayer, lint if one hour each day could be devoted by each praying soul in this parish to intercessory prayer on its behalf, what immense re- sults might be expected ! Surely we might be more thoroughly in earnest. Surely we might plead more with God, when infatuated men are deaf. Does not the Lord wait to be gracious, imtil He hears our cry (Isa. XXX. 19) ? ' Ye people, pour out your heart be- fore Him.' " In her visitations, not less than in her own hidileii life, the "blessed hope" grew daily more precious. " I have always found it," she writes in her diary, " pioduce a deeper impression upon the poor tli:in any other subject." And elsewhere she says : " ll opens the Scriptures to us in an entirely new light I find, too, that all who receive this view are agreeJ that it mnkcs them fed less concern and love for tlio THE BLESS KD II OPK. 41 WL.rkl tlian nnythino^ we can iinngino. It gives one this foelinix, ' It" Christ is coining so soon, what mat- ters it what ruc-n think of us, if only we are safe in Christ ? and what is there in tlie world worth caring for, since we shall so soon have done with it?' I know that we may say the same thing with respect to the shortness and uncertainty of life; but we do not realize it in the same way." The " hope " wonderfully quickened her own steps heavenward. " It should ever be the Christian pil- grim's answer," she writes, "to every allurement to loiter or make a home down liere, ' I cannot tarry ; I am journeying.' (Num. x. 29.) And whither? Even to that land of promise, ' of which the Lord hath said, I will give it you.' He is ' going home.' It is already his by promise and by gift, and he is going to take possession of it ! It is not merely a resolution, it is a matter of fact that even now he is on his tvai/. It could bo no question with Isi-ael of old ; for they were neither in Egypt, living in the land of Goshen, nor in Canaan ; but between the two — 'journeying.' And they felt it — knew it — to be so. " 'We are on the way to God :' " 'And nightly do we pitch our tents A day's march nearer home.' We make progress in a journey : we expect none of the rest, or ease, or comforts of home, but press on- wards. And the promise of God leads us on We can trust to it. 4* 42 MEMOIR OF A . L . NEWTON. " ' Thor.gli the shore we hope to land oa Oiil}- b}' report is known, Yet we freely all abandon, Led by that report alone, And to Jesus Through the trackless deep move on.' " Schiller, iu one of his tragedies, has a personage who, in her enthusiasm of attachment exclaims, " lie sails on troubled seas — Amelia's love sails with him ; he wandere iu pathless deserts — Atoelia's love makes the burning sand grow green beneath him, and the stunted shrubs to blossom ; the south wind scorches liis bare head, his feet are pinched by the northern snow, stormy hail beats round his temples — ^Amelia's love rocks him to sleep in the storm. Seas, and hills, and horizons are between us ; but souls escajx?. from their clay-prisons, and meet in the paradise of love." That is but a fond creation of the fancy, without a counterpart in life's realities. Ikit the Cliristian pilgrim finds, in the hope of his Lord's "appearing," a gladness which is here but faintly shadowed. "Jesus endured the cross," writes our pilgrim, " for the joy that was set befo: e Ilim ; and that we may endure it, He would have the 'fulness of joy in His presence,' and the crowns which lie promises to ' those who overcome,' to be ever before us." This annihilates intervening "seas, an 1 hills, and horizons." " IMake haste my Beloved !" the soul cries in its struggle, lifting heavenward its faith and hope, " and be thou like a roe or a young hart upon the mountains of Ik-ther." THE 11 r K OF L O R Y . 43 Ilor tliouiilits »t limes toolc the form of verse. The linos wliich follow, thougli very simple, have a sweet pensivencss about them, betokening the heart of the stranger whose eye is upon the Canaan-rest. They are founded on.Col. i. 27, and are dated " May 10, 1846:" "'the hope of glory.' "So bright is the hope of the glory before me, I'm often impatient, in haste to be gone: 1 long, blessed Jesus, with saints to adore Thee, Those glorified spirits surrounding Thy throne. "So bright is the hope, that I ivould not live alway For pleasures tliis poor fading earth can bestow ; They never can satisfy, never eiin cheer me, For eacl) 'r-iQ is tainted with sorrow and woe. "Of this bo(l\ of sin and of death I 'm so weary, I cling t'j he bright ^hnpe o/gloky' in store For the souln who have found all on earth to be weary And long to attain to the heavenly shore. "Lord, hasten the time of Tiiy blessed returning. To give us the peace and the rest that remain For Thy servants who stand with their lamps ready burning, To enter Thy glory, and wi/Zi Tliee to reign ! "This — this is the Hope that is now set before us; Oh! when shall we enter that glorious rest? Welcome, pain! welcome, death 1 if it brings us to Jesuis, And l-'iuishes liope in our pleasures po.^sessed." CHAPTER IV. He •who tempers the wind to the shorn lamb, had been solacing His servant with tliis "strong consolation," before laying upon her ]Iis chastening rod. Her unceasing labours in the " district" began at length seriously to undermine her never very robust frame. In April, 1844, we find her "going round a new district, containing at least one hundiod houses," and "fairly tired out with e;ich day's work." "1 have been this evening," she writes, in June of the same year, " to see another poor woman, very much like Mrs. , but more anxious. I have had two deeply interesting talks with her. Only think, what a pn'vilege to bo allowed to speak to poor sinners of a Saviour's love ! JNIay our unworthy efforts bo blessed !" And in March, 1845, she writes: "If you knew liow fully every moment has been occupied lately, you would not wonder at my long silence. Suffice it to say, that last wiek I was out at district-work four days out of the six, from breakfast in the morning till foui' or five in (he aft-rnoon." HEALTH BROKEN DOWN. 45 Often protracliiit;: lier visitations until she was obliged to hasten home too late for dinner, she at last sat down one day oveilieated, and caught a chill. It was in June, 1840. It speedily became apparent that only a season of entire rest could afford any hope of real amendment. Writing ft cm Malvern, to which she had gone " for change of air," she says, of date June 30 : " You ask about my health. I am not well, but not ill. A troublesome cough has got me at last into the doc- tor's hands. lie has ordered me to the sea-side, where I may get my constitution strengthened and have no teinptalion to work as I was doing at home. He has positively forbidden me to go into crowded rooms, Sunday-schools, &c., or to sit in the open air. I have had appliances to my chest; and I hope, in time, to be cither restored to health again, or to go where pain aiid sin are known no more — to that per- fect 'rest which reinaineth.' My times are in His liands." Yinet has remarked, that "those who hope and trust in Jesus Christ present us with a strange spec- tacle — that of weak, fiail, mortal men, for whom suf- fering and death are no longer a necessity endured involuntarily, but in sonit sort an act of the will, be- cause, by consenting to those chastisements, they transform them into sacrifices." It was so, emphati- cally, with Adelaide Newton. Not suffering "in spite of herself," but consenting cheerfully before- hand fo the Master's will, she was to find in her com- ing .surterings, only "a bitter dew," which should 46 M E M O I II OF A . L . NEWTON. develope and mature in her soul the gonn of faith and of hope. "Tlien shall tlicse po-wcrs, wliicli work for grief, Enter Thy pay, And, day by day, Labour Tliy praise and my relief: With care and courage buikiing me, Till I reach lieav'n — and, much more, Tlieel " "What an unspeakable mercy it is," she writes to a fellow-sufferer, "that God should give us these trials, and should care so much for us as to watch over them, and over us in them — that, through them, Ave may be brought nigh unto llim 1 You are, I am certain, being 'led by the right way;' and if it is a darker way, will not in all probability the result be brighter ?" And to another : "You know that each drop in your bitter cup is measured out to you by the unerr- ing hand of your heavenly Phj-sician, \\ho never makes mistakes, or ceases to watch His patients for one moment. Sometimes I rejoice to think how very soon I may die ; for I am sadly tied and bound by the chain of sin, and long to be delivered fnm) this body of coiTuption : but I oftener thiidc there is too much to be done in me before I am ' made meet' for glory, to allow me to die yet. How calming it is to remember the words of that hymn — '"Till Hk bids, I cannot die; When the time IIk wills is come, Kought can keep nic from my hjmc.' SUFFERIXGS AND SACRIFICES. 47 A.nd then to think of oui- meeting in glory, wliere (here is fulness of bliss for cvennore ! Oh ! surely this is a prospect which may well cheer us in our wearisome jnlgiimage through the wilderness of lifo temporal. Life eternal we cannot understand at present ; but what we know not now, we shall know hereafter. I will try and pray for you in your present trouble. Let us not double the anxieties of to-day, by adding those of to-morrow: ' Suilicienf unto the day is the evil thereof.' " Cecil observes, that " such is the state of the world, and so much depends on action, that everything seems, to say loudly to every man, ' Do something — do it — do it !' " Dear Adelaide had hitherto been an earnest doer : now she was to be a patient endurer. But, though no longer able to " speak" much about " the King," her " tongue" was transformed into " the pen of a ready writer ;" and greatly was the Lord to bless her words "Is it not wonderful," we find her writing, for example, to one who had not yet decided for Christ, " that you can love such a world so well ? It is ver\ hard to give up all and follow Christ ; indeed, with men it is impossible. But, blessed be God, when He makes us willing, He gives us the needful strength for every trial. What a wonderful reality there is in these things — so difterent from the head-knowledge which so many possess, who never will be partakers of heaven or of Christ ! It is hard, veiy hard, to be- come a true Christian ; but think, only for ono moment, what is the only alternative ! Do not yon shudder at the bare idea of dying unprepared ? Oh ? 18 MEMOIR 01" A . L . N K W T O N . iny doar F , can you go on unconrcrncd, at tho bnnk of everlasting death ? If I may speak from my own experience, I would urge you not to leave the spot where you now are, nor to let the present moment pass by, without making up your mind at once to give up the world and devote yourself to IIim. Forgive me, and don't be offended ; it is all because I love you so much." [' One ilay, a friend romaiked to Cievhar 1 Tersteegen, '"God has much ti'ouble in bringing up his children." " Yes," said Tersteegen, " and in bringing them down." The detaching and the attaching usually go hand in hand. "I think," we find Adelaide writing at this period, " God has been teaching us both the same lesson, though by different means — namely, that we must be weaned from a love of earthly ob- jects and find ha])piness in IIim alone. I have by no means learned the lesson yet myself. No sooner is ore idol removed than I find myself setting up an- other immediately. God finds in me, I am sure, a most rebellious, wayward child ; but lie deals most wisely, most graciously with me. Pray that we both may find our faith growing exceedingly, and our love to each other abounding, whilst the love of so many waxes cold." Wandering about in search of health, she writes to one of her sisters thus : "I have been getting my Irish-reader collection made up, and, thr(nifi:h (xod's help, sent IG^. yesterday. One of my tiials now is such a feeling of indolence ami inability to arouse myself — the re-action, I suppose, of over-exertion in THE IRIS 11 -READER COLLECTION. 49 times past. How you woukl laugh, could you see me at this moment ! sitting all alone in my bed-room, at the open window, with bonnet, shawl, and everything on ! I quite enjoy the air and the sun in this way ; and I must submit to not seeing my friends, remem- bering the blessedness of being left alone with Jesus. You taught me that !" And siie adds : " I can't make out what means to do ; but it is the very best thing for us to have the world embittered to us in all ways. Should we ever have been what we are, if we had had the uncrossed lives so many young people lead ? And I believe, the | more we know of conformity to the ' Man of sorrows,' as lie was ' acquainted with grief,' the more we know of Himself, who is all our happiness, our joy, our peace. May He be glorified in you, dearest N , where you now are, and ask the same for your fondly attached sister, Adelaide." '' The " Irish-reader collection" was an object veiy near to her heart. " I am sure," she writes to the Secretary, on the occasion above noted, " when I look upon my first originating this little plan, I cannot but wonder at the marvellous success which God has been pleased to grant — not so much in my own case, as in raising up, through us, three other instruments in the same service." Four missionaries were now in that field, all of them owing the means of cultivating it entirely to her exertions. And the money was the least element contiibuted. By maintaining a constant correspondence with the agent-s, and communicating the leading features of their labours to a large circle 50 M E M O I 11 OF A . /, . N i: W T O N . of friends, she kept alive iu many hearts a glow of devotion on behalf of the worlc, which bore its fruits in the singular blessing with whicli, their words were attended. In July (184G) she returned huniu "much worse." "The air of Malvern," she writes, "was too keen and bracing for me. And now I am ordered, as soon as possible, to go to the sea, iu some warm, shellered place. I get quite impatient at times to have done with sin, and with this body of sin which I carry about with me ; but I must learn to wait the Lord's time. It is difficult to learn to leave everything in the hands of God ; but it is a lesson we must learn, and we must be thankful for any means by which we are taught it." Later in the season we find her at Sandgate. Re- joicing over one who had at length consecrated her- self to God, she writes, on Sept. 29 : " God has dealt Avonderfully with you, in enabling you to separate yourself from others who serve Ilim by profession only. I cannot help rejoicing with you. It seems as if He were dealing with you as Avith a choice plant, whom He would shelter from the withering blasts which would have assailed you at home. I am sure of one thing, that it is all love, and that it is just be- cause He loves us that He thinks it worth while to try and to prune lis. But I must ask you to pray that the end of His present dealings with me may be fully answered, and that He may still m.'ike use of me in His service, though in a difterent way from that I have been used to." A OLE AM OF SUNSHINE. 51 From Sandgate she went to London. There a gleam of sunshine seemed to break upon her. " Mr. Evans' words to me yesterday," she writes, on Nov. 2, "were — 'I think I see in you beginnings of tliat im- provement which, I fully beheve, will end in perfect restoration by the time you are leaving Torquay.' So that I must look upon this winter," she adds, " as a precious opportunity, which I may never have again, of growing in the knowledge of God. It may be, that a life of active service is still in store for me ; but I delight to think that the future need be no source of anxiety to me, and that our chief object ought to be to live habitually in dependance on that sweet promise, 'As thy day, so shall the strength be.' How sweet it is to lie passive in His hands, and tc know no will but His !" CHAPTEK V. "Our drive through the vale," writes a Swiss traveller, " brought us full in the view of the snowy Blumlis Alps at sunset. "What a form of majesty and glory 1 IIow lie thugs the flaming mantle of the evening sun down upon us, as if he were him- self about to ascend in fire from earth to heaven !" Adelaide Newton now enters on a course of discipline which reminds us, at every step, of that sun-mantled Alp. Torquay is a spot around which not a few assem- ble sadly fragrant memories. Dear Adelaide is not the only saint whose evening sun has here shed its cheering rays. But not often has "An unimpeded commerce with the sun" :iluminc, " I was saying to Miss E , I should really be soriy when the time came for me to leave Torquay. ' I'm not sure,' she replied, veiy kindly, ' that you ever will have to leave it.' I instantly replied, ' Oh ! I'm not going always to live here.' And she added, ' Well, from all Dr. has lately told me, he has quite given me the impression, that he thinks it Mill be necessary for you to live in a mild climate.' I am not much given to anticipate ; and when I think of the extreme uncertainty of life, it would bo vain to be looking forward : but it proves very plainly to my mind, tiiat I have little or no prospect of ever being sti'ong, which at times comes over me with a degree of shrinking; and yet if it is to make me reflect mure of the image of a suffering Saviour, I am sure I ought to be the last to complain." And to the same, on January 15 : "You cannot think how I enjoyed the Sacrament; only I got so tired. I don't think I am so well altogether since I cnme here. Some time ago, I never could have believed that I could be so happy — cut off from all active work for God as I am now. I feel as if it would l)e quite a blessing to have a constant reminder, in this body of sin, that this is not my rest. It will INCREASING ILLNESS. 65 be a constant proof of the chastening hand of God upon rae." And again : " I am more and inoro persuaded, that it is -wrono: so to lone: for death, as I sometimes do ; for nowhere in Scripture is it set before us as a subject for hope, but always the Lord's Second Com- ing ; and, therefore, it is not our own selfish gratifi- cation in the release from such a life which is our hope, but the glory of Christ in the perfected con- dition of the whole body at Ilis coming. At the longest, it is but ' a little while.' Oh ! what a com- fort ! I am enjoying ' Howe on the Righteous' very much ; on Ps. xvii. 15, he speats so very animatingly of likeness to Go J, and of the glory we shall then enter upon ! But what a subject it is for worms like us to think about ! Oh ! for growing likeness to Him now !" It is not easy to praise the Lord in the fires. And yet if these fires, not touching a hair of the garment, only loose the bonds, is there not cause for praise ? "I am beginning to think," dear Adelaide writes to a fellow-sufterer, at the beginning of February, " that His chastenings arc actually the strongest proofs of His intense love to us ; and how sweet that makes them, none know but those who learn it, as you and I are learning it now." As the Avinter advanced, her illness grew more alaiming. A sister, whose " happy privilege it was to be appointed her companion," writes: "At the end of January she became inueh worse ; and she coiitiimeil very ill indeed through February and part 66 M E M () 1 K U V A . I. . N K \V TON. of March ; but, towards the iloj^e of thuv mouth, the hectic fcviT and the iuicoasiiigiics.s of her(;ough rather abated." Aud anotlier trial was added. " I nevar remember to have endured," Adelaide writes to another of her sisters, on Pebruary 22 (ISlY), "more intense paiu than durinc; the last fortnight ; and, the last day or two, mental anguish has aggravated bodily sufiering, to a degree I never at all understood before. I have no doubt that Satan took advantage of the state of extreme weakness I was reduced to, to make his temptations the more effectual; but s.tonger is lie that is in us, than he that is against Ui, blessed be God ! And I delight to tell you, for your own en- couragement, that yesterday in the midst of such mental darkness and bodily pain, I still felt the as- surance that God was the same unchanged God as when I was able to feel Ilim precious to me. I rcould not liolp thinking that it might be in answer to a prayer I have often prayed with trembling, ' that I might know Ilim aud the fellowship of His suffer- ings,' that 1 was made to taste of the bitterness of that cup which He drank when temjited of the devil ; , for that, too, was at a season of peculiar bodily weak- ' ness." And she adds : " I like to tell you all this, dearest N , because I feel it is real experience, which is worth many thousand times as- much written from head-knowledge of l>ible-truths. I am certain now that it is only in the furnace we are purged from sin. And, however trying it may be, I hope you will prar GOD S GENTLE i'RESSURE. 57 that God may accomplisli all His will in me, 1 want to feel more thankfulness for His chastening love, and not to shrink from sutl'ering." She began to " get into smoother waters again." "Positivelj', I am wonderfully better," she writes, April 9 ; " and what is more, I am thankful to be so. It is God's mercy, and shall be continued at His pleasure. At one time Dr, thought very badly of me, and I really hoped my pilgiimage on earth was nearly lam ; but if God should call mo back to the world again, do pray that I may be kept from a worldly spirit. In this ' light affliction' God has been making me feel, by gentle pressure, that He is holding me tightly in His hand. Oh ! what a mercy to be so kept !" Nothing proves so aftectingly our lack of likeness to God, as the faintness of our compassion for perish- ing souls. God loved the world so much that He gave His dear Son for it ; we love the world so little, that too often we feel it an otlbrt to tell men that God has given Him. One of the lessons which dear Adelaide was learning in the school of trial, was an iutenser sympathy Avith God in this matter. "I wonder," she writes to one of her sisters, '' what you and G are doing to-day to make known the riches of God's mercy to fallen men. Oh ! the ho- nour of rescuing but one soul from — oh ! I wish I thought more what it is from. How much more thankful we should be, if we d'd !" And, on another occasion, referring to a woman in her district, who was very ill : " Dc give Mrs. P. a kind message from 68 ME MO in OF A. L. NEWTON. me wlion you see her, and ask her if she remcmbera a long conversation I had with her last May, urging her not to put off seeking Clirist till she came to be ill ? I suppose she had a ' Just as I am ;' will you a«;k her to consider that as my message to her, and entreat her not to rest happy one moment till she has come to Christ? I have so often repented of not having sent a special message to poor Mrs. R , that I am doubly anxious not to lose this oppor- tunity ; and I never but once spoke faithfully to Mrs. P ." If dear Adelaide was unworldly, she was not un- human. llcr warm, genial heai't liad an ear for nature's symphonies. "The day was lovely," she writes, April 14, " and this place so exquisitely beau- tiful, that perhaps natural feelings excite me too much. Yet God has given us all these things 'richly to enjoy ;' and when we can enjoy them, I believe we ought. Sometimes it is a burden to me even to hear the birds sing, so little do I yet know of the joy God has in all His works !" One of her greatest trials this winter was her inability to attend public oidinances. In her Diary, she writes: '■'■Sunday, April 11. — The thirteenth Sunday spent at home 1 ' Lord, show me wherefore thou contendest with me.' " And writing to a friend, April 20, she says : " It is now fourteen Sun- days since I was in church ; and you may imagine what this is to me, who, sooner than stay away, have more than once actually got up out of bed to go. LONELY SABBATHS. 69 But God is al)le to make all grace abound towards me." A little iucident, which had occurred at Leylands the previous summer, illustrates this feature of her character. Living at some distance from town, she was not in the habit of attending evening service. "We were dreadfully starved," writes one of her sisters, " with our afternoon sermons that summer ; and she and I were allowed to go in the evening again in consequence, as long as daylight lasted. But each Sunday we feared it would be the last When it came, I was comforting myself by singing hymns in the garden, whilst the bells were ringing for evening service. Presently she came out, saying, ' How can you sing V I reminded her of an expo- sition we had heard and enjoyed at a fi-iend's house, on Ps. cxxxi., and said, 'I was trying to behave and quiet myself hke a weaned child.' ' Oh,' she said, ' so was I ; but those seem so blessed who can still be praising God in His house — who can dwell there ; — I long for it so. To hear the bells is more than I can bear ; I shut myself in ray room, and bulled my head, while I was tiyiug to bear the dis- appointment.' " And she " took heed how she heard." The same informant adds: "She never would speak, if she could avoid it, after leaving church, and often begged I Avould not talk to her as we walked home, even though it should oidy bo about the sermon we liad heard." But, shut out from the sanctuary, dear Adelaide 80 MEMOIR OF A. h. NEWTON. liad Other joys. "I enjoy my Bible," she writes, April 23, "when quite alone, so that I have no room for complaining. I can never he sufficiently thank- ful for havifig such an opportunity of learning some- thing of God, and of what Ho becomes to us in Christ — a very present help in trouble." And to her sister, a day or two later, thus : " I sot.ietimes enjoy my lonely Sundays very much, and r.hey go quicker than ever. And no wonder, when tliey are spent in the study of that blessed Word which is the very life of the soul ! God can feed us both with Himself, dear N , without either ministers or church ; and it is well worth being deprived of the comfort of either or both, to be driven to Him, the fountain of living waters. " ' Break all thy schemes of earthly joy, That thou mayest fiud thine all in MeI" Is not that just our experience at this very time?" And in another direction she was tasting the same flesh-crucifying but soul-profiting experience. "I see plainly," she writes, "that both in you and in me there is a tendency to fonn an idolatrous kind of at- tachments; and God in mercy makes us feel that they are not Himself. Wliat a bitter lesson it is to learn, and how much teaching we have taken to lea^n eveu what we have learned !" Herbert, in his " Country Parson," has a chapter on "The Parson in Circuit," in which he describes, after his Dwn quaint fashion, the method of a tiue Bhcpherd. Describing a visit from a dear servant of THE SUNKEN FENCE. 61 Christ, who had come a considerable distance to see her, Adelaide Avrites, "April 9 (1847) :" " Mr. Dallas walked up to the window at Holm Cottage with B., about half-past two ; and as he came into the room, -and took my hand — while we stood, he prayed that the Holy Spirit might be with us, to mrike our intercourse profitable and to God's glory, for Jesus Christ's sake. " As B. walked up with him, he had asked if be might speak out plainly to me, or if I could not bear the thought of death, &c. ? She said he might ; so the moment she left the room, he began to talk to me, asking me if I thought much about going to be with Christ ? if I could bear to think about dying, or if I felt afraid of it ? When I said I did not, he said it was right to have a sense of the horrid nature of death as part of the curse of sin, and that it should not be regarded as a light thing. But he was ' very thankful' to find that he might talk to me so quietly about it ; and he said, what a wonderful thing it was that two redeemed sinners could talk in that way of what the world shrinks from the bare mention of. How it magnified the grace of God, which had wrought such a change in us ! He said he hoped I could look on death as a sunken fence, j-.n 1 look over it and beyond it to the glory on the otlier side. Then he talked a great deal about the Second Coming of Jesus, the first resurrection, and how near he thinks it is. " He spoke next to me about depressions in illness — the mind being acted on by the body -that at 62 MEMOIR OF A. L. NEWTON. such times, wliatever we may feel, the believer is just as safe as when asleep, and that the veiy sorrow we feel at our inability to pray, &c., is actually com- munion with God — it is the Spirit working in our hearts. He also talked to me about sleep. He said the best remedy for calming an agitated mind (which, after all, was the cause generally of wakeful nights) was to fix the mind on one thought, such as Christ upon the cross. " Then he knelt down and prayed for me, that I might enjoy much of His presence — much of the Spirit's teaching — very near and close communion with God — a sense of acceptance through Jesus, that all God's pui-i)0ses might be fulfilled, and the end of my coming here, &c., be fully realized, and that I might have patience to wait God's ai^pointed time for going to be with Jesus, &c., &c. Then he prayed for B,, and for each member of our family, and for all we loved in the Lord, and that such as were not yet, might be speedily gathered into His fold; so that, whether we were among the dead in Christ, or the living who were to be caught up to meet them, we might be ' for ever with the Lord.' " We give these jottings, both as indicating the method of visitation which meets such an invalid's necessities, and also as opening up a glimpse into dear Adelaide's own heart. Grace had adorned with a most engaging patience a temperament naturally somewhat quick. " As we moved from lodging to lodging," says her sister, who was with her, " suiting the warmer and lower situa- PATIENCE UNDER LITTLE TRIALS. 63 tions to the colder weeks of winter, she rejoiced in believing that in each she gained something which she could not have had without the move, though that moving was in itself irritating to her natural dis- position, and sometimes, when so ill, a real trial." " In every lodging," her sister adds, " she studied to make friends with our landlady and sei'vants in order to do them good. Though I chiefly waited upon her, some things — such as cleaning her rooms, lighting her bedroom fire, &c. — brought her into immediate contact with the young servant girls, and her patience with each one having to be taught ex- actly how she wanted things to be done, often struck me. One, a girl named Jemima, especially annoyed her. She was very dull ; yet dearest Adelaide beg- ged me to try and teach her about spiritual thing's — would often ask about her interest in them, and if I observed any — and afterwards she took her in hand herself. Indeed, several of these people have told me how they prized her words, and t!>at they believed they 'had got quite a blessing from her.'" In May, " it was thought that the journey and the excitement of going homo would most probaby aggravate her illness beyond the hope of recovery." " I have had a most precious winter here," she writes, May 14, "during which God has been teaching me for eternity. Oh ! how sweet it is to hold commu- nion with our Heavenly Father! It is just a fore- t,en meet to transplant me there. Oh ! for a more tha'jk- ful heart for the very peculiar tenderness which has marked all His dealings with me, and rendered it so sweet, so endeared a spot to me during my pilgriiu- age, especially in regard to the sweet communion with Christian friends, much of which will, I trust not pass away as fruitless, but remain for eternity ! I thank God for giving them to me just when lie knew I needed the comfort of them. May I trust Him for suflScient grace for every future need !" And on reaching home, she writes f o a friend : " I am here again for a time, though I must sjiend the few next winters in Torquay, they tell me, if I live. Oh ! what an if that is ! God has been preparing me for going to be with Him in His own time, be it sooner or later. I only pray that, if His will is that I should live, my life may be more than ever devoted to His single service." And, indeed, she " did what she could." Writing at this pciiod to the Secretary of the Ii'ish Missions, bIic savs : "I enclose O'Gonnor's s:ilarv fi^r tlu.' ncv*^ A 8 E C R E T . 66 quarter. I am thaukful to be well euongli to write and road, and work. I think now that it will become my duty to do Avhat needlework I can for the Soci- ety, as more active work is impossible. In that and in some such ways I may do something, however little, in the service of that Redeemer who, when He bought me, bought my time and talents, and requires all to be used for Ills glory." One of the methods by which she helped forward the work in Ireland was by her pen. We close this chapter with a specimen of some of her earnest ap- peals to the Irish her.rt : '•A SECRET: " ' His secret is wiLli tlio righteous.' "I've just heard a bit of uncommon good news fiom Ireland ; and in these times, when the plague is already begun among the people, I think it is a shame to keoj) it to myself. "Everybody knows how bad the cholera is, and nobody can say that they mayn't be the next to be taken with it ; but eveiybody does not know how to live through it. " I've just lieard of a ' Healer ;' and if you like to know where He is, I'll tell you. The word ' Jesus,' in Irish, means ' Healer ;' and Jesus is the most wonderful man for heahng disease that ever was heard of. It is true He is out of sight ; but then He is in heavot), every bit as true a man as He was when He came down from the mountain and the leper met Him, saying, ' I^ord, if thou wilt, tliou canst maka 0* 66 MEMOIR OF A . L . NEWTON. rae clean. And Josus put fortli His liaiid and touched him, saying, I will, be thou clean.' And ffis Word had that divine power in it, that ' imme- diately his leprosy was cleansed.' (Matt. viii. 2, 3.) " If Jesus was a Healer tlion, Jesus is a Healer still. But the most wonderful part of the secret is, that His Word has got that divine power in it, that, to anybody wlio asks, He can give life without end, and euro them of death altogether. ' The gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.' (Rom. vi. 23.) He can send a breath of the Spirit of life into us, and make our bodies temples of the Holy Ghost, so that no matter what may happen to the earthly hut of these clay tabernacles which we now inhabit — they may decay and they may die, but the immortal inhabitant lives on and on for ever ! The spirit of life which is in them only changes earth for heaven ; and, since it came from heaven, it's no grief to it to return to heaven. It only wants to take all it loves along with it. " Wlio will come ? Who will get this heavenly life, and go to heaven when they die ? I vei'ily believe it only wants asking for. "There is one thing more about this secret, and that is, why so few people give any credit to it ? My answer is, just because it is ' secret.' If Jesus the * Healer' was seen walking in the streets, some few might beheve their own eyes when they saw Ilim. But this is what I have to say : "Heifi// be seen soon — for ' every eye shall see Ilim' — but it will be too late to be healed then. THEHEALER. 6*7 lie is the Healer — now. The cures are wrought by faith, not by sight. The Hfe is the Holy Spirit. It is secret now — ' Your Ufe is hid with Christ in God.' But it will be plain enough by and bye, ' For when Christ who is our life shall appear, then shall ye also appear with Him in glory.' (Col. iii. 3, 4.) " ' A man shall bo as an hiding place.' " CHAPTER VI. " I AM certain there must be more growth in (^Fcace, more study of tbe Word and character of God, and more time given to it — in fact, it must be more our business (Luke ii. 49) — if we are to be exalted Christians." In these words — written in June, 1847 — Adehiide Newton indirectly expressed her own personal life. "It was indeed a privilege," writes one who knew ber well at this period, " to be with her and to enjoy her heaven-born thoughts. " ' In everything she said or did, There was a touch of heaven.' I was struck, especially, with lier complete absorp- tion in the Bible. She was always digging in the precious mine ; and this gave to her mind a peculiar tone — that of searching for the mind of God iu everything." In reading the "Word, she was never content if God was " silent" to her. " Silence," we find lier writing, " betwixt our souls and God is one of the most painful trials we endure ; even as wo know tlie A n S O R r T I O N IN THE BIBLE. 69 bitter trial it is when n, much-loved friend will not speak to us. David felt what it was to bo silent towards God throuo^h his sin. ' When /kept silence, my bones waxed old through my roaring all the day long; my moisture is turned into the drought of summer.' It brings such withering deadness over the soul. Oh ! why do we not ' acknowledge' — sj)eak out — 'our iniquity?' David knew also what it was for God to be silent towards him : hence his praver — 'Be not silent to me ; lest, if thou be silent to me, I become like them that go down into the pit.' The word rendered ' silence' denotes a willing or voluntary silence as opposed to being 'dumb' and unable to speak. How often wo provoke the Lord to silence ! like a father who cannot talk freely to his child, be- cause it has displeased him ! Alas ! how many hours and days, as well as moments, we lose in silence, which might be spent in happy, holy intercourse with our God ! How blessed it is when He is ' not silent' — when we hear His voice in every word wo read in Scripture — when we hear Ilim speaking ♦peace!' 'Sp<'ak, Lord !'" Here lay the secret of her heavenly walk. It was literally a walk with God — a living fellowship — an interchange of thought — God uttering His thoughts to her in the Word, and she uttering her thoughts to God at the throne. On either side she could not brook " silence." It was this holy and happy fellowship with the Father and with the Son which gave to her words and to her whole life so sweet a fraorrance. " I am 70 M E M O I n OF A . I. . N K W T O N . sure that letter-writ. ng ouly on ordinary subjects," she says, July 7 (1847), " is a sad waste of precious time, and very unpardonable amongst the Lord's people, who ought, in their writing, ;i.s well as in their life and conversation, to be ditierent from the world around them." And she proceeds: " It is very try- ing for all three of you to be so much out of health ; but, dearest M , you are able to feel that it is all exactly right and for the very best, are you not ? We who know something of the utterly un- satisfying nature of this world's worth, through sick- ness or bereavcTnent or other trials, feel the want of One who can sympathize with us in it all, and is in Himself sufficient to make amends for all. And surely Jesus is! We only need to know llim, to be sure of it ; and every fresh view of Him shows but the more entirely how 'altogether lovely' He is." A friend had asked her if she thought it " a duty to pray for restoration to health." Replying to the inquiry, July 9, she says: "Don't you think it would not be wrong to do so, even though it were God's purpose not to grant it ? for we have the example of Christ Himself praying earnestly for what God never intended to grant; only, it was with Him, and ought always to be with us, accom- panied by, ' Nevertheless, not what I will, but what thou wilt.' From this, would it not almost seem as if we might pray about anything and everything, so long only as we ask all in submission to the will of God ? Don't you think that God will in some way or other hiniler as fron: asking what we ought not, SYMPATHY OF CHRIST. 71 or asking too deteiininately for any particular thiijg, as He did St. Paul ? He was set upon the removal of the ' thorn in the flesh,' and prayed (he says) thrice about it ; and then God stopped him, not telling him he had done wrong, but only assuring him that His grace was sufficient to enable him to bear it. I readily believe He will deal with us in the same way, and that sincere prayer for the teaching of God's Spirit in prayer will save us from praying sinfully." In her Diary, on July 14, she writes: "Read Canticles. Oh ! to come into the chambers — the secret presence — of my Beloved ! to have sweet fore- tastes now of the heavenly communion to be enjoyed with Him in glory ! (Ps. Ixxiii. 25)." And, another day, she records a visit from a friend who prayed " that, having been separated from others for so long, it might be evident to them now that she had been ■with Jesus." Like Andrew going forth that morning in search of Simon, to speak of Him with whom he had passed the night, dear Adelaide now with a new devoted- ness everywhere commended Christ. " Oh ! what a God we have to do with !" she writes, on July 15 : " what tenderness, sympathy, and wise, unerring love, guide His hand in all His dealings with us ! If any one ever had reason to boast of the loving-ldnd- ness of the Lord, it surely must be myself. Time would fail me to tell of the great tenderness He has shown towards me : but you may take encour- agement, from what He has done for me, that you, 72 MEMOIR OF A . L . NEWTON. too, will find Him the same God. He changes not !" Her state of health since her return home, she notes in the same letter, thus : " I am come home much better, but weak and good for nothing, and quite obliged to be idle. I believe I look very well, and at times I feel very well ; but there are hours of weariness which none know but those who know what real illness is. How precious to feel that each is measured out by our loving Father, and is really working out for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory ! I have thought of you very often in your peculiarly trying circumstances. To see the liand of God in each, renders them almost welcome ; for it is a peculiar honour and privilege to suffer with Christ, and will assuredly end in 'reigning with Him.'" She was no cynic, but rejoiced, like the Master, to make all around her hapj)y. Delicately temper- ing congratulations with a seasonable admoniti