Handy Speaker. Nos. 1, 2, 3, i, 5 and 6, 50 Selections in each. Price 1.5 cents each. 1^ CopyrlKht, 1876, by Qkobob M, Bakbb. Mrs. VTalthrop's Bacbelors. Comedy in Three Acts. Translated from Qerman by Oeorge M, Baker. 25 cents. The Fairy of the Fountain. Play for Little Folks. Two Acts. By George M. Baker. 25caBU. Coupon Bonds. Drama in Four Acts. Bv J. T. Trowbridge. 25 cents. Under a Veil. Ccimmedetta in One Act. By Sir Randal Roberts. 25 cents. Class Day. Farce in One Act. By Dr. F. A. Harris. 25 cents. Uncle Robert. Comedv in Three Acts. 7 male, 1 female character. 15 cents. The "Wile's Secret, flay in Five Acta. 9 male, 3 female characters. 15 cents. Xbe Virsiuia "Veteran. Drama in Four Acts. 11 male, 4 female charactera. SficeDtf. J^ Spencer's Universal Stage. A Collection of COMEDIES, DRAMAS, and FARCES, adapted to either Public or Private Performance. Containing a full description of all the jiecessary Stage Business. PRICE, 15 CENTS EACH, os- No Plays Exchanged. 1. LOST IN LONDON. A Drama in 3 Acts. 6 male, 4 female characters. 2. NICHOLAS FLAM. A Comedy in 2 Acts. By J. B. Buckstoiie. 5 male, a female char. 3. THE WELSH GIRL. A Comedy in 1 Act. By Mrs. Planche. 3 male, 2 female cliar. 4. JOHN WOPPS. A Farce in 1 Act By W. E. Suter. 4 male, 2 female char. 6. THE TTJKKISH BATH. A Farce in 1 Act. By Montague Williams and F. C. Burnaud. C male, 1 female char. e. THE TWO PUDDIFOOTS. AFarceinl Act. By J. M. Jlorton. 3 male, 3 female char. 7. OLD HONESTY. A Comic Drama in 2 Acts. By J. M. Morton. 5 male, 2 female char. B. TWO GENTLEMEN IN A Pi:}^ /! Farce in 1 Act. By W. E. Suter. 2 male char. 9. SMASHINGTON GOIT. A Farce in 1 Act. By T. J. Williams. 5 male, 3 female char. I TWO HEADS BETTER THAN ONE. A Farce in 1 Act. By L«nox Home. 4 male, 1 female char. 11. JOHN DOBBS. A Farce in 1 Act. By J. M. Morton. 5 mule, 2 female char. 12. THE DAUGHTER of the REGIMENT. A Drama in 2 Acts. By Edward Fitzball, C male, 2 female char. 15. AtTNT CHARLOTTE'S MAID. AFarceinl Act. By J. M. Morton. 3 male, 3 female char. 14. BROTHER BILL AND ME. A Farce in 1 Act. By \V. E. .Suter. 4 male, 3 female char. \B. DONE ON BOTH SIDES. A Farce in 1 Act. By J. SI. Morton. 3 male, 2 female char. 16. DTTNDITCKETTY'S PICNIC. A Farce in 1 Act. By T. J. Williams. G male, 3 female char. 17. I'VE WRITTEN TO BROWNE. A Farce in 1 Act. By T. J. Williams. 4 male, 3 female 19. MY PRECIOUS BETSY. A Farce in 1 Act. By J. M. Morton. 4 male, 4 female char. 20. MY TURN NEXT. A Farce in 1 Act. By T. J. Williams. 4 male, 3 female char. 22. THE PHANTOM BREAKFAST. A Farce in! Act. By Chas. Selby. 3 male, 2 female char. 23. DANDELION'S DODGES. A Farce in 1 Act. By T. J. Williams. 4 male, 2 female char. 24. A SLICE OF LUCK. AFarceinl Act By J. M. Morton. 4 male, 2 female char. 25. ALWAYS INTENDED. A Comedy in 1 Act By Horace Wigan. 3male,3fei -.alechar. 26 A BULL IN A CHINA SHOP. A Comedy in 2 Acts. By Charles Matthews. C male, 4 female char. 27. ANOTHER GLASS. A Drama in 1 Act By Thomas Jlorton. C male, 3 female char. 28. BOWLED OUT. A Farce in 1 Act By H. T. Craven. 4 mule, 3 female char. 29. COUSIN TOM. A Conmiedietta in 1 Act. By Geo. Roberts. 3 male, 2 female char. 30. SARAH'S YOUNG MAN. A Farce in I Act. By W. E. Suter. 3 male, 3 female char. 31. HIT HIM, HE HAS NO FRIENDS. A Farce in 1 Act. By E. Yates and N. 11. Har- rington. 7 male, 3 female char. 32. THE CHRISTENING. A Farce in 1 Act. By J. B. Buckstunc. J male (i female char. 33. A RACE FOR A WIDOW. A Farce in 1 Act By T.J. Williams. 5 male, 4 female char. 34. YOUR LIFE'S IN DANGER. A Farce in 1 Act By J. JNI. Morton. 3 male, 3 female char. 35. TRUE UNTO DEATH. A Drama in 2 Acts. f» By J. Sheridan Knowles. 6 mule, 2 female char. Df — 'tth"> Catalogjte vtailed free on application to «eo. M. imker, 41-45 Franklin St., Boston. 36. DIAMOND CUT DIAMOND. An Interlude in 1 Act. By W. U. Murray. 10 male, 1 female char. 37. LOOK AFTER BROWN. AFarceinl Act By George A. Stuart, M. D. 6 male, 1 female char. 39. A F 40. BROTHER BEN. A Farce in 1 Act. By J. M. Morion. 3 male, 3 female char. 41. ONLY A CLOD. A Comic Drama in 1 Act By J. P. Simpson. 4 male, 1 female char. 42. GASPARDO THE GONDOLIER. A Drama in 3 Acts. By George Almar. 10 male, 2 female char. 43. SUNSHINE THROUGH THE CLOUDS. A Drama in 1 Act. By Slicgsby Lawrence. 3 male, 3 female char. 44. DON'T JUDGE BY APPEARANCES. A Farce in 1 Act. By J. M. Morton. 3 male, 2 female char. 45. NURSE Y CHI CKWEED. AFarceinl Act By T. J. Williams. 4 male, 2 female char. 46. MARY MOO ; or, Which shall I Marry? A Farce in 1 Act. By W. £. Suter. 2 male, 1 female char. 1 5 Acts. 8 mole, 48. THE HIDDEN HAND. A Drama in 5 Acts. By Robert Jones. 16 male, 7 female char. 49. SILVERSTONE'S WAGER. A Commedi- etta in 1 Act. By R. R. Andrews. 4 male, 3 fe- T male char. 50. DORA. A Pastoral Drama inS Acts. By Chas. Reade. 6 male, 2 female char. 55. THE WIFE'S SECRET. A Play in 5 Acts. By Geo. W. Lovell. 10 male, 2 female char. 66. THE BABES IN THE WOOD. A Com- edy in 3 Acts, By Tom Taylor. 10 male, 3 fe- 57. PUTKINS -, Heir * 3 Castles in the Air. A Comic Drama in 1 Act By W. R. Emerson. 2 male, 2 female char. 58. AN UGLY CUSTOMER. A Farce in 1 Act By Thomas J. Williams. 3 male, 2 female char. 59. BLUE AND CHERRY. AComedy inlAct 3 male, 2 female char. 61. THE SCARLET LETTER. A Drama in 3 Acts. 8 male, 7 female char. 62. WHICH WILL HAVE HIM? A Vaude- ville. 1 male, 2 female char. 63. MADAM IS ABED. A Vaudeville in 1 Act 2 male, 2 female char. 64. THE ANONYMOUS KISS. A Vaudeville. 2 male, 2 female char. 65. THE CLEFT STICK. A Comedy in 3 Acts. 5 male, 3 female char. 66. A SOLDIER, A SAILOR. A TINKER, AND A TAILOR. A Farce in 1 Act 4 male, 2 female char. 67. GIVE A DOG A BAD NAME. A Farce. 2 male, 2 female char. 68. DAMON AND PYTHIAS. A Farce. 6 male, 4 female char. 69. A HUSBAND TO ORDER. A Serio-comic Drama in 2 .A.cts. fj male, 3 female char. , 70. PAYABLE ON DEMAND. A Domestic Drama in 2 Acts. 7 male, 1 female char. y OUR MUTUAL FRIEND J §omttIi>, I JSr r-OXTR. A.GTS. DRAMATIZED FROM CHARLES DICKENS By HARRIETTE R. SHATTUCK. r -u..:;±lJ-..M~ BOSTON: LEE & SHEPiVriD, Piablishiers, 18 7 9. COPYRIGHT, 1 S 7 0, By IlArniF.TTic E. Siiattuck. /Z-3'SUj Stereotyi)ed at the Boston Stereotype Foundry, No. 19 Spring Lane. OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. CHARACTERS. Jonx RoKESMITH, (" Our Mutual Friend.") R. WiLFER, (" Cherubic Pa.") Mr. Boffin, (" The Golden Dustman.") George Sampson, (" The Friend of the Family.") Bella Wilfer, (" The Lovely Woman.") Mrs. Wilfer, (" Majestic Ma.") L.WINIA Wilfer, (" The Irrepressible Lavvy.") Mrs. Boffin, (" A dear, a dear, the best of dears.") Scene : London. OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. COSTUMES. John Eohesmith — ( " A dark gentleman, thirty at the most.") Phiin black suit. Act IV., Dark suit. Light overcoat and gloves. Silk hat. R. Wilfer — (■' Rusty. Ruddy, Round.") Black suit and hat, worn and rusty. Act IV., Dressing-gown and slippers. Must be short, stout, and blonde. Mr. Boffin — (" A broad, round-shouldered old fellow.") Thick shoes. Thick leather gaiters. Pea overcoat over suit of mourning. Broad-brimmed felt hat. Acts II. nnd III., Checked or striped suit. High-colored vest. Flashy neck- cloth. Watch and seals. Act IV.. Add overcoat and hat. George Sampson — (" A young gentleman of rising prospects.") Blonde hair, parted in the middle. White trousers and vest. Velvet coat. Yellow gloves. Bright neck-tie. Silk hat. Large cane, the round head of which he holds in his mouth all the time. Bella — (" So mercenary, so wilful, hut so pretty.") Act I., Plain biack dress. Act II., Elegant riding habit. Act III., Rich house-dre.ss, changed in Scene 2 to very ])lain dress, sacque, and hat. Act IV., Stylish walking costume, (not too rich.) Mrs. Wilfer — (" A tall woman, and an angular.'") Severely plain brown or gray waist and skirt — short enouj^h to show slip- pers and black stockings. Plain collar. Handkerchief tied over head and knotted under chin. Large-sized cotton gloves (worn all the ume.) Lavvy — ("Old enough to be engaged.") Short costumes of girl of sixteen. Act IV., Long traihng house-dress, of bright color and over-trimmed. Mrs, Boffin — (" A smiling creature, broad of figure and simple of nature.") Elegant velv.t or silk costumes. A profusion of 1'ewelry. Broad velvet hat with long plumes. Ads I. and v., Long velvet mantle. OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. ACT I. Scene. — A plainly fumislied room in R. Wilfer's house. Mrs. WiLFER sitting majestically in the corner, L. Bella and LavvY playing backgammon, R. c. Doors R. and L. Window c. Enter R. Wilfer, r. R. W. Well, Piggywiggies, good morning ! and a fine morning it is too ! Mrs. W. If, R. W., you had arisen from your repose at the hour generally adopted by your family as seasonable for leaving their couches, you might have accosted your family in more appropriate language. li. W. Why, what's the matter, my dear ? I'm sure — Mrs. W, {interrupting him with a wave of her gloved hand.) If you will gaze upon the entrance to your domicile, 11. W., as you issue forth to your daily toil, doubtless you will undei'stand my meaning. ii. W. Why, what has happened, my dear ? Lavvy. O lor ! they've been and took off ma's door-plate, pa, that's all. Mrs. W. Yes, the man came himself with a pair of pincers, and took it off, and took it away. He said that as he had no expecta- tion of ever being paid for it, and as he had an order for another Ladies' School door-plate, it was better (burnished up) for the in- terests of all parties. E. W. Perhaps it was, my dear ; what do j-ou think ? Mrs. W. You are master here, R. W. It is as you think ; not as I do. Perhaps it might have been better if the man had taken the door too ? It. W. My dear, we couldn't have done without the door. . Mrs. W. Couldn't we ? B. W. Why, my dear ! Could we ? Mrs. W. It is as you think, R. W. ; not as I do. 5 6 OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. R. W. (sitting.) What I was thinking of, my dear, was, that as we have let our first floor so well, and as we have now no place iu ■ which you could teach pupils, even if pupils — Mrs. W. (interrupting.) The milkman said he knew of two young ladies of the highest respectability who were in search of a suitable establishment, and he took a card. Tell your father whether it was last Monday, Bella. Bella. But we never heard any more of it, ma. a. W. In addition to which, my dear, if you have no place to put two young persons into — Mrs. W. (waving her gloved hand.) Pardon me, they were not young persons. Two young ladies of the highest respectability. Tell your father, Bella, whether the milkman said so. R. W. My dear, it is the same thing. Mrs. W. No, it is not. Pardon me ! R. W. I mean, my dear, it is the same thing as to space. As to space. I carry it no further than that. And solely looking at it — as I am sure you will agree, my love — from a fellow-ci'eature point of view, my dear. Mrs. W. I have nothing more to say. It is as you think, R. W. ; not as I do. (Bella jerks the backgammon board off the table and crosses to hearth-rug, C. Lavvy goes down on her hands and knees, and picks up the men.) Poor Bella ! R. W. And poor Lavinia, perhaps, my dear ? Mrs. W. Pardon me, no ! No, R. AV. Lavinia has not known the irial that Bella has known. The trial that your daughter Bella has undergone, is, perhaps, without a parallel, and has been borne, I will say, nobly. When you see your daughter Bella in her black dress, which she alone of all the family wears, and when you re- member the circumstances which have led to her wearing it, and when you know how those circumstances have been sustained, then, R. W., lay your head upon your pillow, and say, " poor Lavinia ! " Lavvy [from under the table.) I don't want to be "poored" by pa, nor anybody else ! Mrs. W. I'm sure you do not, my dear, for you have a fine, brave spirit. And your sister Bella has a fine brave spirit of another kind — a spirit of j)ure devotion, a beau-ti-ful spirit. Bella. I am sure, though you have no feeling for me, pa, I am one of the most unfortunate girls that ever lived. You know how poor we are, and what a glimpse of wealth I had, and how it melted away, and how I am here in this ridiculous mourning — which I hate ! — a kind of a widow who never was married. And yet you don't feel for me. — Yes you do, yes you do. (Goes to him and passes her hand throuqh and through his hair.) R. W. My dear, I "do. Bella. Yes, and I say you ought to. If they had only left me alone and told me nothing about it, it would have mattered much less. But that nasty Mr. Lightfoot feels it his duty, as he says, to OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. 7 write and tell me what is in reserve for me, and then I am obliged to get rid of George Sampson. Lavvy {rising.) You never cared for George Sampson, Bella. Bella. And did I say I did, miss ? George Sampson was very fond of me, and admired me very much, and put up with everything I did to him. Lavvy. You were rude enough to him. Bella. And did I say I wasn't, miss ? I am not setting up to be sentimental about George Sampson. I only say George Sampson was better than nothing. Lavvy. You didn't show him that you thought even that. Bella. You are a chit and a little idiot, or you wouldn't make such a dolly speech. What did you expect me to do ? Wait till you are a woman, and don't talk about what you don't understand. You only show your ignorance ! It's a shame ! There never was such a hard case ! I shouldn't care so much if it wasn't so ridicu- lous. It was ridiculous enough to have a stranger coming over to marry me, whether he liked it or not. It was ridiculous enough to know I shouldn't like him — how could I like him, left to him in a will like a dozen of spoons, with everything cut and dried beforehand. Those ridiculous points would have been smoothed away by the money, for I love money, and want money — want it dreadfully. I hate to be poor, and we are degradingly poor, offensively poor, mis- erably poor, beastly poor. And if the truth was known, when the Harmon murder was all over the town, and people were speculating on its being suicide, I dare say those impudent wretches at the clubs and places made jokes about the miserable creature's having pre- ferred a watery grave to me. And the idea of being as poor as ever after all, and going into black, besides, for a man 1 never saw, and should have hated — as far as /te was concerned — if I had seen! And now he is dead, and all the Harmon property is gone to those Boffins, and of course they will never take any notice of me, and I'm as poor as ever. It's a shame ! Mrs- W. Doubtless old Mr. Harmon was pleased with your per- sonal attractions, — as who is not pleased with a child of mine ? — and judged you a fit companion for his son, — as who would not ? Bella. Yes, without consulting Ids taste at all. Mrs. W. When I married your father my taste was not con- sulted. Lavvy. Nor his either, was it, ma ? Mrs. W. Certainly not. It w as not the custom with mamma and papa (I allude to my parents) to consult the wishes of their offspring on such matters, Lavvy. Such matters ! What matters? Bella. They don't concern you, Lavvy, at least. As for me, pa, I am resolved to get money, and to get money I must marry money ! "Talk to me of love ! Talk to me of fiery dragons ! But talk to me 8 OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. of money, and horses and carnages, fine dresses and jewelry, and then indeed we touch upon realities. (^ knock L.) Mrs. W. Who is it ? Enter ! Enter John Rokesmith, l. Eoke. The servant-girl had her key in the door as I came up, and directed me to this room, telling me I was expected. I am afraid I should have asked her to announce me. Mrs. W- {rising.) Pardon me ; not at all. Two of my daugh- ters. R. W., this is the gentleman who has taken our first-floor. He was so good as to make an appointment for this morning, when you would be at home. Eoke. Seeing that I am quite satisfied, Mr. Wilfer, with the rooms, and with their situation, and with their price, I suppose a memorandum between us of two or three lines, and a payment down, will bind the bargain ? I wish to send in furniture without delay. {Takes a chair which R. W. offers him.) Mrs. W. The gentleman, R. W., proposes to take our apart- ments by the quarter. A quarter's notice on either side. R. W. Shall I mention, sir, the form of a reference ? Boke. I think that a reference is not necessary ; neither, to say the truth, is it convenient, for I am a stranger in London. I re- quire no reference from you, and perhaps, therefore, you will re- quire none from me. That will be fair on both sides. Indeed, I show the greater confidence of the two, for I will pay in advance whatever you please, and I am going to trust my furniture here. Whereas, if you were in embarrassed circumstances — this is merely supposititious — Mrs. W. {stitinrj.) Perfectly. Roke. Why then, I might lose it. R. W. Well, money and goods are certainly the best of refer- ences. Bella. Do you think th3y are the best, pa? B. W. Among the best, my dear. Bella. I should have thought, myself, it was so easy to add, " the usual kind of one." (La VVY gets pen and ink, and R. W. and Roke. sign the agreement.) Bella {taking the pen.) Where am I to go, pa, here in this cor- ner ? {Signs. As she looks up RoKE. looks at her and she at him..) Boke. Much obliged to you, Miss Wilfer. Bella. Obliged? Boke. I have given you so much trouble. Bella. Signing my name? Yes, certainly. But I am your landlord's daughter, sir. (Roke. pays money to R. W., and exit R.) Bella. Pa, we have got a murderer for a tenant. OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. 9 Lavvy. Pa, we have got a robber. Bella. To see him unable for his life to look anybody in the face ! There never was such an exhibition. R. W. My dears, he is a diffident gentleman, and I should say particularly so in the society of girls of your age. Bella. Nonsense, our age ! What's that got to do with him ? Lavvy. Besides, we are not of the same age : — which age ? Bella. Never yoic mind, Lavvy : you wait till you are of an age to ask such questions. Pa, mark my words ! Between Mr. Roke- smith and me there is a natural antipathy and a deep distrust ; and something will come of it! , (Goes to mirror.) a. W. My dear, and girls, between Mr. Rokesmith and me, there is a matter of eight sovereigns, and something for our supper shall come of it — something you all like. So now good morning, dears, and be sure to have a good fire kindled and the kettle boiling mer- jily, and this shall supply the rest. (Exit L.) Lavvy. And by this time to-morrmv we shall have Mr. Roke- smith here, and shall be expecting to have our throats cut. Bella. You needn't stand between me and the light for all that. This is another of the consequences of being poor ! The idea of a girl with a really fine head of hair having to do it by a few inches of looking-glass ! Lavvy. You caught George Sampson with it, Bella, bad as your means of dressing it are. Bella. You low little thing ! Caught George Sampson with it ! Don't talk about catching people, miss, till your own time for catch- ing — as you call it — comes. Lavvy. Perhaps it has come. Bella. What did you say ? What did you .say, miss? Nothing to wear! Nothing to go out in! Nothing to dress by! Being obliged to take in suspicious lodgers ! (A knock L.) Mrs. W. Peace ! Lavinia, attend ! (Bella sits R.) Lavvy (going to the door.) Please to walk in ! Our servant is out. Enter Mr. and Mrs. Boffin, l. Mr. Boffin. Mornin', niornin' ! Lavvy. Mr. and Mrs. Boffin, I think? Mrs. B. Yes, dear, that's our name. Lavvy. If you'll step this way. — Ma, Mr. and Mrs. Boffin. (Exit Lavvy, R.) Mrs. W. (rising.) Pardon me ; to what am I indebted for this honor ? Mr. B. To make short of it, ma'am, perhaps you may be ac- quainted with the names of me and Mrs. Boffin as having come into the Harmon property. Mrs. W. I have heard, sir, of such being the case. (Motions them to seats, which they take.) 10 OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. Mr. B. And I dare say, ma'am, you are not very much inclined to take kindly to us? Mrs. W. Pardon me. 'Twere unjust to visit upon Mr. and Mrs. Boffin a calamity which Avas doubtless a dispensation. Mr. B. That's fairly meant, I am sure. Mrs. Boffin and me, ma'am, are plain people, and we don't want to pretend to anything, nor yet to go round and round at anything ; because there's always a straight way to everything. Consequently, we make this call to say, that we shall be glad to have the honor and pleasure of your daugh- ter's acquaintance, and that we shall be rejoiced if your daughter will come to consider our house in the light of her home equally with this. In short, we want to cheer your daughter, and to give her the opportunity of sharing such pleasures as we are agoing to take ourselves. We want to brisk her up, and brisk her about, and give her a change. Mrs. B. That's it ! Lor ! let's be comfortable. ^ Mrs. W. Pardon me. I have several daughters. Which of my daughters am I to understand is thus favored by the kind inten- tions of Mr. Boffin and his lady.^ Mrs. B. Don't you see? Naturally, Miss Bella, you know. Mrs. W. Oh-h ! My daughter Bella is accessible, and shall speak for herself. Bella. I am much obliged to you, I'm sure, but I doubt if I have the inclination to go out at all. Mrs. W. Bella ! you must conquer this. Mrs. B. Yes, do what your ma says, and conquer it, my dear ; because we shall be so glad to have you, and because you are much too pretty to keep yourself shut up. We are going to move into a nice house, and we'xe going to set up a nice carriage, and we'll go everywhere and see everything. {Kisses Bella.) Mr. B. Yes, Mrs. Boffin has carried the day, ma'am, and we're going in neck and crop for Fashion. 3Irs. W. 'Twere far from me to deny the right of JMr. and Mrs. Boffin to such pretension?. 3Irs. B. (laughing.) Yes, what I want is Society. 1 say, a good house in a good neighborhood, good things about us, good living and good society. Lor-a-mussy ! when I think of me in a light 3ellow chariot and pair, with silver boxes to the wheels — Air. B. Oh ! you was thinking of that, was you, ray dear ? Mrs. B. Yes ! And with a footman up behind, with a bar across, to keep his legs from being poled ! And with a coachman up in front, sinking down into a seat big enough for three of him, all cov- ered with upholstery in green and white ! And with two bay horses tossing their heads and stepping higher than they trot longways ! And with you and me leaning back inside, as grand as ninepence! Ha ha ha ! And so says I to Noddy, my dear, [to Bella'] let's do something for that poor disappointed girl that's had her riches all took away ; and so here we are, and we want you to come and live OUR MUTUAL FRIEND, 11 with us, and see the sights and enjoy the money that ought to be your own, my love. You mustn't take a dislike to us, to begin with, because we couldn't help it, you know, my dear. Mr. B. That's it ! that's it ! What a thinking steam-ingein this old lady is ! And she don't know how she does it. Neither does the ingein. Enter Lay^y , followed by George Sampson, r. Mrs. W. (rising.) My youngest daughter, Lavinia, Mr. George Sampson, a friend of the family. Mrs. B. If you like to bring your sister with you when you come to stay with us, of course we shall be glad. The better you please yourself. Miss Bella, the better you'll please us. Lavvy. Oh, my consent is of no consequence at all, I suppose ? Bella. Lavvy, have the goodness to be seen and not heard. Lavvy. No, I won't ! I'm not a child, to be taken notice of by strangers. Bella. You are a child ! Lavvy. I'm not a child, and I won't be taken notice of. " Bring your sister," indeed ! Mrs. W. Lavinia ! Hold ! I will not allow you to utter in my presence the absurd suspicion that any strangers — I care not what their names — can patronize my child. Do you dare to suppose, you ridiculous girl, that Mr. and Mrs. Boffin Avould enter these doors upon a patronizing errand ; or, if they did, would remain within them, only for one single instant, while your mother had the strength yet remaining in her vital frame to request them to depart ? You little know your mother if you presume to think so. Lavvy. It's all very fine — Mrs. W. Hold ! I will not allow this. Do you not know what is due to guests ? Do you not comprehend that in presuming to hint that this lady and gentleman could have any idea of patronizing any member of your family — I care not which — you accuse them of an impertinence little less than insane ? Mr. B. Never mind me and Mrs. Boffin, ma'am ; we don't care. Mrs. W. Pardon me, but / do. Lavvy. Yes, to be sure. Mrs. W. And I require my audacious child to please to be just to her sister Bella ; to remember that her sister Bella is much sought after ; and that when her sister Bella accepts an attention, she considers herself to be conferring qui-i-te as much honor as she receives. Bella. I can speak for -myself, you know, ma. You needn't bring me in, please. Lavvy. And it's all very well aiming at others through conven- ient me ; but I should like to ask George Sampson what he says to it. 12 OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. Mrs. W. {glaring at Geo. S.) Mr. Sampson, as a friend of this family and a frequenter of this house, is, I am persuaded, far too well-bred to interpose on such an invitation. Mrs. B. We should be happy to see him at any time. George S. Much obliged to you, but I'm always engaged, day and night. Mr. B. By the way, ma'am, you have a lodger ? Mrs. W. A gentleman undoubtedly occupies our first floor. Mr. B. I may call him Our Mutual Friend. What sort of a fellow is Our Mutual Friend, now ? Do you like him ? Mrs. W. Pardon me! From the limited period of my acquaint- ance with Mr. Rokesmith, he seems to be a very eligible inmate. Mr. B. Well, i'm not particularly acquainted with him, ma'ara. You give a good account of him. Is he at home ? Mrs. W. Mr. Rokesmith has but a short period since left this apartment. Indeed, {looking from window, c.) there he stands at the garden gate. Waiting for you, perhaps. Mr. B. {rising to go.) Perhaps so. Saw me come in, maybe Mrs. B. {going.) Good-bye for the present, Miss Bella. We shall meet again soon. Mr. B. 'Mornin', 'mornin' ! {Exit Mr. and Mrs. BOFFIX. L.) Lavvy. There, Bella I At last I hope you have got your wishes realized by your Boffins ! You'll be rich enough now icith your Boffins ! You can have as much flirting as you hke at your Bof- fins ! But you won't take me to your Boffins, I can teil you ! You and your Boffins too ! Geo. S. {taking cane from his mouth.) If Miss Bella's Mr. Boffin comes any more of his nonsense to me, I only wish him to under- stand, as betwixt man and man, that he does it at his per — (Lavvy jerks his cane in again forcibly.) Mrs. W. Of their manners I say nothing. Of their appearance I say nothing. Of the disinterestedness of their intentions towards Bella I say nothing. But the craft, the secrecy, the dark, deep, underhanded plotting written in Mrs. Boffin's countenance, make me shudder. {Exeunt Mrs. W., Lavvy, aiid Geo. S., r.) Bella, {taking a book, and throwing herself into a chair, R.) If there is anything ma delights in, it is in making us all seem ridicu- lous before strangers. ]3ut I mean to go and live with that dear old Mrs. Boffin I I know I shall love her I Enter Rokesmith, l., and stands silently. And then I shall escape all this poverty and misery, and having to take in suspicious lodgers — Boke. {interrnptinq.) 1 beg your pardon. Miss Wilfer, but I — Bella. Eh ? Oh, it's you, is it ? Roke. Only I. A — fine — morning. Bella. Is it? I was not thinking of the morning. OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. 13 Bohe. So intent upon your book ? Bella {confused.) Yes. Boke. A love story, Miss Wilier P Bella. Oh clear, no, or I shouldn't be reading it It's more about money than anything else. Boke. And does it say that money is better than anything ? Bella {throwing down the book.) Upon my word, I forget what it says, but you can find out for yourself if you like. I don't want it any more. Boke. I am charged with a message for you, Miss Wilfer. Bella. Impossible, I think ! Boke. From Mrs. Boffin. She desired me to say to you (what she forgot), that she will be ready to receive you in another week, or two at furthest. You do not know, perhaps, Miss Wilfer, that I am Mr. Boffin's Secretary. Bella. I'm as wise as ever, for I dont know what a Secretary is. Not that it signifies. Boke. Not at all. Bella. Then are you going to be always there, Mr; Rokesmith ? Boke. Always? No. Very much there ? Yes. Bella. Dear me ! Boke. But my position there as Secretary, will be very different from yours as guest. You will know little, or nothing about me. I shall transact the business ; you will transact the pleasure. I shall have my salary to earn ; you will have nothing to do but to enjoy and attract. Bella. Attract, sir? I don't understand you. Boke. Excuse me. Since I have become entrusted with Mr. Boffin's affairs I have naturally come to understand the obligation he feels towards you, and the deep interest he takes in your welfare. I venture to remark, that much of your loss may be repaired. I speak, of course, merely of wealth, Miss Wilfer. The loss of a perfect stranger, whose worth, or worthlessness, I cannot estimate — nor you either — is beside the question. But this excellent gen- tleman and lady are so full of simplicity, so full of generosity, so inclined towards you, and so desirous to — how shall I express it ? — to make amends for their good fortune, that you have only to respond. I take the liberty of saying these few words. You don't consider them intrusive, I hope ? Bella. Really, Mr. Rokesmith, I can't say what I consider them. They are perfectly new to me, and may be founded altogether on your own imagination. Boke. You will see. Be-enter Mrs. W., r. Boke. I have been telling Miss Wilfer that I have become, by a curious chance, Mr. Boffin's Secretary, or man of business. 14 OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. Mrs. W. 1 have not the honor of any intimate acquaintance with Mr. Boffin, and it is not for me to congratulate that gentleman on the acquisition he has made. Roke. A poor one enough. Mrs. W. Pardon me ; the merits of Mr. Boffin may be highly distinguished — may be more distinguished than the countenance of Mrs. Boffin would imply — but it were the insanity of humility to deem him worthy of a better assistant. Roke. You are very good. I have also been telling Miss Wilfer that she is expected very shortly at the new residence in town. Mrs. W. Having tacitly consented to my child's acceptance of the proffered attentions of Mrs. Boffin, I interpose no objection. Bella. Don't talk nonsense, ma, please. Mrs. IF. Peace ! Bella. No, ma, I am not going to be made so absurd. Inter- posing objections ! Mrs. W. (very grandly.') I say that I am tiot going to interpose objections. If Mrs. Boffin (to whose countenance no disciple of Lavater could possibly for a single moment subscribe) seeks to illuminate her new residence with the attractions of a child of mine, I am content that she should be favored by the company of a child of nline. Roke. You use the word, ma'am, I have myself used, when you speak of Miss Wilfer's attractions there. Mrs. W. Pardon me, but I had not finished. Roke. Pray excuse me. Mrs. W. I was about to say, that when I use the term attrac- tions, I do so with the qualification that I do not mean it in any way whatever. Bella. Quite enough about this, I am sure, on all sides^ Have the goodness, Mr. Rokesmith, to give my love to Mrs. Boffin — Mrs. W. Pardon me ! Compliments. Bdla. Love ! Mrs. W. No ! Comp'iments. Roke. Say Miss Wilfer's love, and Mrs. Wilfer's compliments. Bella. And I shall be very glad to come when she is ready for me. The sooner the better. Mrs. W. One last word, Bella, before descending to the family apartment. I trust that, as a child of mine, you will ever be sen- sible that it will be graceful in you, when associa:;ing with Mr. and Mrs. Boffin u])on equal terms, to remember that the Secretary, Mr. Rokesmith, as your father's lodger, has a claim on your good word. {t'xeiint Bella and Mrs. W., r.) Roke. (alone.) So insolent, so trivial, so capricious, so mercenary, so careless, so hard to touch, so hard to turn I And yet so pretty. so pretty ! And if she knew ! {Exit slowly L.) Act Drop. OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. 16 ACT II. Scene. — Drawing-room in Mr. Boffin's mansion ; clock on mantel ; long mirror, C. ; plants and flowers in background. Doors R., L., and c. Enter Bella in riding -Jiahit, c. Bella. I could endure that hateful ride no longer. I must see Mr. Rokesmilh to-day, and I've sent for him to meet me here. Telling me of my duty to my family, indeed ! Setting himself up as my adviser! I have a right to be rude to him! {Takes off her hat and gloves, and sits in arm-chair by a small table, R.) Enter Mr. Boffin, l. Mr. B. Ah, Bella my dear, back again ! That's right ; " enjoy each day while yet yqji may," as says my literary man with a wooden leg. Bella. He must be a queer man, sir. Mr. B. He is, my dear ; a regular slasher at poetry. Why, I'll tell you how he lapsed into it one day nearly every other line. Want to hear it, my dear ? Bella. Yes, do say it. Mr. B. {repeating mechanically.) " I'll tell thee how the maiden wept, Mrs. Boffin, When her true love was slain, ma'am, And how her broken spirit slept, Mrs. Boffin, And never woke again, ma'am. I'll tell thee (if agreeable to Mr. Boffin) how the steed drew nigh. And left his lord afar : And if my tale (which I hope Mr. Boffin might excuse) should make you sigh, I'll strike the light guitar." The poem was to me and Mrs. Boffin, and I consider that it brings us both in, in a beautiful manner. 1 got Rokesmith to make a copy of it, and the old lady thinks of having it framed. By the way, you've no idea what an amount of work that Secretary does, Bella, my dear. He takes such wonderful care of my affairs. And yet, somehow, I can't make him out. Bella. May I ask why, sir ? Mr. B. Well, my dear, he won't meet any company here but 'you. When we have visitors, I should wish him to have his regu- lar place at the table, like ourselves ; but no, he won't take it. 16 OUR MUTUAL FHIEND. Bella. If he considers himself above it, I should leave him alone. Mr. B. It ain't that, my dear. He don't consider himself above it. Bella. Perhaps he considers himself beneath it. If so, he ought to know best. Mr. B. No, it ain't that neither. Rokesmith 's a modest man, but he don't consider himself beneath it. Bella. Then what does he consider, sir ? Mr. B. Dashed if I know! It seemed at first as if it was only the lawyer he objected to meet, but now it seems to be everybody except you. Bella {rising and walking up c.) Indeed! That's it, then! Rather cool, I think, in a Secretary and pa's lodger, to make me the subject of his jealousy and keep eligible people off! 3Ir. B. {aside.) Oho, that's it, is it? Well, my lady, we must bring you round. Enter Rokesmith, i.. {aloud.) Here's Rokesmith now. Good bye, my dear. Now's a good chance to tell him what you think of him. - Put it to him strong, Bella, my dear. Ha, ha! {Exit L.) Bella '{turning.) Mr. Rokesmith, I wanted to say something to you when I could have the opportunity. You have no right to think ill of me, sir. Boke. You don't know how well I think of you. Miss Wilfer. Bella {sitting.) Truly, you must have a very high opinion of me, Mr. Rokesmith, when you believe that in prosperity I neglect and forget my old home. Boke. Do I believe so ? Bella. You did, sir, at any rate. Boke. I took the liberty of reminding you of a little omission into which you had fallen — insensibly and naturally fallen. It was no more than that. Bella. And I beg leave ta ask you, Mr. Rokesmith, why you took that liberty ? — I hope there is no offence in the phrase ? it is your own, remember. Boke. . Because I am truly, deeply, profoundly interested in you, Miss Wilfer. Because I wish to see you always at your best. Be- cause I — shall I go on ? Bella. No, sir ; you have said more than enough. I beg that you will 7iot go on. If you have any generosity, any honor, you will say no more. I wish to speak to you, sir, once for all, and I don't know how to do it. I beg for a moment's time. {After a pause.) You know how I am situated here, sir, and you know how I am situated at home. I must speak to you for myself, since there is no one about me whom I could ask to do so. It is not generous in you, it is not honorable in you, to conduct yourself towards me as you do. OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. 17 Eohe. Is it ungenerous or dishonorable to be devoted to you ; fascinated by you ? Bella. Preposterous ! Roke. I now feel obliged to go on, though it were only in self- explanation and self-defence. I hope, Miss Wilfer, that it is not unpardonable — even in me — to make an honest declaration of an honest devotion to you. Bella. An honest declaration ! Boke. Is it otherwise ? Bella. I must request, sir, that I may not be questioned. You must excuse me if I decline to be cross-examined. Boke. Oh, Miss Wilfer, this is hardly charitable. I ask you nothing but what your own emphasis suggests. However, I waive even (hat question. But what I have declared, I take my stand by. I cannot recall the avowal of my earnest and deep attachment to you. and I do not recall it. Bella. I reject it, sir. Boke. I shoufd be blind and deaf if I were not prepared for the reply. Forgive my offence, for it carries its punishment with it. Bella. What punishment? Boke. Is my present endurance none ? But excuse me ; I did not mean to cross-examine you again. Bella. You take advantage of a hasty word of mine to make me seem — I don't know what. I spoke without consideration when I used it. If that was bad, I am sorry ; but you repeat it after con- sideration, and that seems to me to be at least no better. For the rest, I beg it may be understood, Mr. Rokesmith, that there is an end of this between us, now and for ever. Boke. Now and for ever. Bella. Yes. I appeal to you, sir, not to pursue me. I appeal to you not to take advantage of your position in this house to make my position in it distressing and disagreeable. I appeal to you to discontinue your habit of making your misplaced attentions as plain to Mrs. Boffin as to me. Boke. Have I done so ? Bella. I should think you have. In any case, it is not your fault if you have not, Mr. Rokesmith. Boke. I hope you are wrong in that impression. I should be very sorry to have justified it. I think I have not. For the future there is no apprehension. It is all over. Bella. I am much relieved to hear it. I have far other views in life, and why-should you waste your own? Boke. Mine ! My life I Pardon me. Miss Wilfer ; you have used some hard words, for which 1 do not doubt you have a justifi- cation in your mind, that I do not understand. Ungenerous and dishonorable. In what ? Bella. I would rather not be asked. 2 18 OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. Boke. I would rather not ask, but the question is imposed upon me. Kindly exjilain ; or if not kindlj-, justly. Bella, dh, sir ! is it generous and honorable to use the power here which your favor wirh Mr. and Mrs. Boffin and your ability in your ])lace give you, against me ? Boke. Against you ? Bella. Is it generous and honorable to form a plan for gradually bringing their influence to bear upon a suit which I have shown you that 1 do not like, and which I tell you that I utterly reject? Would it be generous and honorable to step into your place — if you did so, for I don't know that you did, and I hope you did not — anticij)ating, or knowing beforehand, that I should come here, and designing lo take me at this disadvantage ? Boke. This mean and cruel disadvantage ! Bella. Yes. Boke. You are wholly mistaken. Miss Wilfer ; wonderfully mis- taken. Bella {rising.) At least, sir, you know the history of my being here at all. And was it not enough that I should have been willed away like a horse, or a dog, or a bird ; but must you too begin to dispose of me in jour mind, and speculate in me, as soon as I had ceased to be the taik and the laugh of the town ? Am I for ever to be made the property of strangers? Boke. Believe me, you are wonderfully mistaken. Bella. 1 should be glad to know it. Boke. I doubt if you ever will. Good-night. Of course I shall be careful to conceal any traces of this interview from Mr. and Mrs. Boffin while I remain here. Trust me, what you have complained of is at an end for ever. Bella. I am glad I have spoken then, Mr Rokesmith. It has been painful and difficult, but it is done. If I have hurt you, I hope you will forgive me. I am inexperienced and impetuous, and I have been a little spoiled, but I really am not so bad as I dare say I appear, or as you may think me. {Exit Rokesmith, l.) I didn't know thf lovely woman could be such a dragon. {Going to the viir- ror.) You have positively been swelling your features, you little fool ! I wish pa was here to talk about avari'^ious marriages, but he is better away, poor dear, for I know I should pull his hair if he icas here. {A pause.) He has no right to any power over me, and how do I come to mind him, when I don't care for him ? Pa's lodger and a Secretary ! indeed ! {Sits l.) Enter K. Mrs. AVilfer, folloived by Lawy and Geo. S. arm-in- arm. They advance slowly towards Bella. Lawy {pointing out objects in the room to George.) Exotics, George. An Ormolu clock, George. An Aviai'y beyond, George. Bella {rising as she notes their approach.) Why, ma, is this OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. 19 you? And here is Lavvy too ! and George Sampson! How do you do, all ? Ma, you shall have this very best chair, Mrs. Boffin's own favorite. {Pushes arm-chair towards Mrs. W.) Mrs. W. Pardon me ! It were not fitting for me to occupy Mrs. Boffin's magnificent reclining couch, coming as we do from the abode of conscious though independent poverty. {Crosses to L. and sits on a high stool.) This is quite an honor for its. You will probably find your sister Lavinia grown, Bella. Lavvy {loho has been examining the room, suddenly comes for- ward.) Ma, I really must request that you will not dragin such ridic- ulous nonsense as my having grown when I am past the growing age. Mrs. W. I grew mj'self after 1 was married. Lavvy. Very well, ma, then I think you had much better have left it alone. George S. To be sure, certainly. Lavvy. I suppose you won't consider yourself quite disgraced, Bella, if I give you a kiss ? Well '. {Sitting R., with Geo. S. by her side.) And how do you do, Bella ? And how are your Boffins ? Mrs. W. Hold ! I will not sufl'er this tone of levity. Lavvy. My goodness me ! How are your Spoffins, then ? since ma so very much objects to your Boffins. Mrs. W. Impertinent girl ! Minx ! Lavvy. ^ I don't care whether I'm a Minx, or a Sphinx ; it's ex- actly the same thing to me, and I'd every bit as soon be one as the other ; but I know this — I'll not grow after I am married ! Geo. S. No, certainly not. Mrs. W. You will not? Foit will not? Lavvy. No, ma, I will not. Nothing shall induce me. Mrs. W. It was to be expected. A child of mine deserts me for the proud and prosperous, and another child of mine despises me. It is quite fitting. Bella. Ma, Mr. and Mrs. Boffin are prosperous, no doubt ; but you have no right to say they are proud. You must know very well that they are not. JjUvvy. In short, ma, you must know very well — or if j'ou don't, more shame for you! — that Mr. and Mrs. Boffin are just ab- solute perfection. Mrs. W. Truly, it would seem that we are required to think so. And this, Lavinia, is my reason for objecting to a tone of levity. Mrs. Boffin (of whose physiognomy I can never speak with the com- posure I would dtsire to preserve) and your mother are not ou terms of intimacy. Lavvy. After all, you know, Bella, you haven't told us how your Whats-his-names are. Bella. I don't want to spe'ak of them. They are much too kind and too good to be drawn into these discussions. Mrs. W. Why put it so ? Why adopt a circuitous form of speech ? It is polite and it is obliging ; but why do it ? Why not 20 OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. openly say that they are much too kind and too good for us? We understand the allusion. Why disguise the phrase ? Bella. Ma, you are enough to drive a saint mad ; and so is Lavvy ! Mrs. W. Unfortunate Lavvy ! She always comes in for it. My poor child ! Lavvy. Don't patronize me, ma, because I can take care of my- self. Mrs. W. {to Bella.) I only wonder that you find time and incli- nation to tear yourself from Mr. and Mrs. Boffin, and come to see us at ali. I shall expect you hut seldom. Bella. Ma, I think you are too bad, and so is Lavvy. Pa is too magnanimous to feel envy and spite towards my generous friends, and pa is delicate enough and gentle enough to remember the sort of little claim they thought 1 had upon th.-m. And I always did love poor dear ]ia better than all the rest of you put together, and I always do, and I always shall ! {Bursts into tears.) Mrs. W- {raising her eyes to heaven.) Fate has spared you this, R. W., whatever it may have thought proper to inflict upon me. {Bursts into tears.) Lavvy, {walking around excitedly.) I hate the Boffins ! I don't care who objects to their being called the Boffins. I WILL call 'era the Boffins. And I sii^' they are mischief-making Boffins, and I say the Boffins have set Bella against me, and I tell the Boffins to their faces, that they are detestable Boffins, disreputable Boffins, odious Boffins, beastly Boffins. There! {Flings herstlf into a chair and weeps.) George S. {rising.) What I mean to say is. Why do you take me to the glittering halls with which I can never compete, and then taunt me with my moderate salary ! Is it generous ? Is it kind ? Bear with a wretch, Lavinia, bear with a wretch, ma'am, who feels the noble sacrifice you make for him {slaps his forehead), but is goaded almost to madness when he thinks of competing with the rich and influential. {Falls on his knees at Lavvy's feet and weeps.) Act Drop, (quick.) OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. 21 ACT III. Scene I. — Sarne as Act II. Mr. and Mrs. Boffin discovered sitting together on a sofa, C. Mr. B. And so that is the secret, is it, old lady ? Mrs. B. Yes, Noddy ; and to think that he is our own little John Harmon, our own little boy that we watched and tended ; and he so sad and sorrowful, and we never to know. Mr. B. But how did you find him out, tell me now? Mrs. B. O, when I looked in last night and saw him sitting lonely by the fire, so sad, so lonely, after what our Bella had been saying to him, every grain of the gunpowder that had been lying sprinkled thick about him ever siiice 1 first set eyes on him when he came to be your Secretary, took fire, and I knew him. Too many times I'd seen him when he was a poor child, sitting, lonely, to be pitied heart and hand. I just made out to cry, '* 1 know you now, you're John ! " {Laughs and cries at once.) Mr. B. Well, well, old lady, it's all right now. He's come to life again, and shall have his money bark and be happy. Mrs. B. But he won't take it. Noddy. Mr. B. O, that's all a notion. It's all because — now I've got a secret to tell i/ou, old lady. Rokesmitb — 3Irs. B. {iidemipting.) My Hitle John Harmon. Mr. B. Yes, our John Harmon, old lady, only he will call him- self otherwise. Well, he's in love with our Bella, and now I've got a plan to make her fall in love with him. Don t you see? M}S. B. Bless her dear little heart, Noddy ; I think she loves him now, only she don't know it herself. Mr. B. But she has refused him. She wants to marry money. She has mighty grand ideas ! Mrs. B. Bless you, that's all a notion, Noddy, that's all a notion. Mr. B. Well, I've got a notion too. You know how I've been treating him of late on purpose to make her take his part. Now, to- day we shall see. I'll go it stronger. I'll be a regular old grisly growler. Mrs. B. Don't be too hard, Noddy my love. Mr. B. (rising and walking about.) Yes I shall. I'll be a brown bear, a regular old grim one. Now, old lady, you mustn't spoil it all. Come, put on a sober face, for here comes Bella. Enter Bella, R. Mr. B. Don't be alarmed, Bella, my dear. I'll see you righted. Bella. See me righted, sir ? 22 OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. Mr. B. (drawing her hand through his arm.) Ay, ay ! See you righted. Enter Rokesmith, l. Mr. B. Shut the door, sir ! I have got something to say to you which 1 fancy you'll not be pleased to hear. Boke. I am sorry to reply, Mr. BofEn, that I think that very likely. Mr. B. What do you mean ? Boke. I mean that it has become no novelty to me to hear from your lips what I would rather not hear. Mr. B. Oh! perhaps we shall change that. Boke. I hope so. Mr. B. Now, sir, look at this young lady on my arm. Boke. I do so. Mr. B. How dare you, sir, tamper, unknown to me, with this young lady ? How dare you pester this young lady with your im- pudent addresses ? Boke. I must decline to answer questions that are so offensively asked. Mr. B. You decline to answer, do you? Then I'll tell you what it is, Rokesmilh ; 111 answer for you. There are two sides to this matter, and I'll take 'em separately. The first side is, sheer Insolence. That's the first side. It was sheer Insolence in you even to think of this young lady. This young lady was far above yon. This young lady was no match for you. This young lady was lying in wait for money, and you had no money. What are you, I should like to know, that you were to have the audacity to follow up this young lady ? This young lady was looking about the market for a good bid ; she wasn't in it to be snapped up by fellows that had no money to lay out ; nothing to buy with. Bella, {going quickly to Mrs. Boffin.) Oh, Mr. Boffin ! Mrs. Bof- fin, pray say something for me ! {Mrs. B. weeps.) Mr. B. Old lady, you hold your tongue. Bella, my dear, don't you let yourself be put out. I'll right you. Bella. But you don't, you don't right me ! You wrong me ! Mr. B. Don't you be put out, my dear. Now, you Rokesmith ! You hear me tell you that the first side of your conduct was Inso- lence — Insolence and Presumption. Answer me one thing, if you can. Didn't this young lady tell you so herself? Bella, {burying her face in her hands.) Did I, Mr. Rokesmith ? O say, Mr. Rokesmith ! Did I ? Boke. Don't be distressed. Miss Wilfer ; it matters very little now. 3Ir. B. Ah ! You can't deny it, though ! Bella. But I have asked him to forgive me since ; and I would ask him to forgive me now again, upon my knees, if it would spare him. {Mrs. B. bursts into tears.) OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. 23 Mr. B. Old lady, stop that noise ! Tender-hearted in you, Miss Bella. Now, you Rokesmith, I tell you that's one side of your con- duct — Insolence and Presumption. Now, I'm a-coraing to the other, which is much worse. This was a speculation of yours. Boke. I indignantly deny it. Mr. B. It's of no use your denying it ; I've got a head upon my shoulders, and it ain't a baby's. What ! Don't I know what grabs are made at a man with money ? If I didn't keep my eyes open, and my pockets buttoned, shouldn't I be brought to the workhouse be- fore I knew where I was ? I'm agoing to unfold your plan before this young lady ; I'm agoing to show this young lady the second view of you ; and nothing you can say will stave it off. {Bella sinks into a chair and hides her face.) Now, attend here, Bella my dear. Rokesmith, you're a needy chap. You're a chap that I pick up in the street. Are you, or ain't you ? Boke. Go on, Mr. Boffin ; don't appeal to me. Mr. B. Not appeal to you! No, I should hope not ! Appealing to you, would be rather a rum course. You come and ask me in the street to take you for a Secretary, and I take you. Vei-y good. Boke. Very bad. Mi: B. What do you say ? This Rokesmith is a needy young man that I take for my Secretary out of the open street. This Rokesmith gets acquainted with my afiliirs, and gets to know that I mean to settle a sum of money on this young lady. " Oho !" says this Rokesmith; "this will be a good haul; I'll go in for this!" But fortunately she was too many for him, and a pretty figure he cuts now he is exposed. There he stands ! Look at him ! Boke. Your unfortunate suspicions, Mr. Boffin — Mr. B. Precious unfortunate for you, I can tell you. Boke. — are not to be combated by any one, and I address my- self to no such hopeless task. But I will say a word upon the truth. Mr. B. {snapping his fingers.) Yah ! Much you care about the truth. Mrs. B. Noddy ! My dear love ! Mr. B. Old lady, you keep still. I tell him again, much he cares about the truth. Boke. Our connection being at an end, Mr. Boffin, it can be of very little moment to me what you say. Mr. B. Oh ! You are knowing enough to have found out that our connection 's at an end, eh ? But you can't get beforehand with me. Look at this in my hand. This is your pay, on your discharge. You can only follow suit. You can't deprive me of the lead. Let's have no pretending that you discharge yourself. I discharge you. Boke. So that I go, it is all one to me. Mr. B. Is it ? But it's two to me, let me tell you. Old lady, don't you cut in. You keep still. Boke. Have you said all you wish to say to me ? 24 OUR MUTU.AX FRIEND. Mr. B. I don't know whether I have or not. It depends. Roke. Perhaps you will consider whether there are any other strong expressions that you would like to bestow upon me ? Mr. B. I'll consider that at my convenience, and not at yours. Mrs. B. Noddy ! My dear, dear Noddy ! You sound so hard ! Mr^ B. Old lady, if you cue in when requested not, I'll get a pillow and carry you out of the room upon it. What do you want to say, you Rokesmith ? Boke. To you, Mr. Boffin, nothing. But to Miss Wilfer and to your good kind wife, a word. Mr. B. Out with it then, and cut it short, for we've had enough of you. Roke. I have borne with my false position here, that I might not be separated from Miss Wilfer. Since Miss Wilfer rejected me I have never again urged my suit, to the best of my belief, with a spoken syllable or a look. But I have never changed in my devo- tion to her, except — if she will forgive my saying so — that it is deeper than it was, and better founded. Mr. B. Now. mark this chap's saying,- Miss Wilfer, when he means Pounds, Shillings, and Pence ! Boke. My interest in Miss Wilfer began when I first saw her ; even began when I had only heard of her. It was, in fact, the cause of my throwing myself in Mr. Boffin's way, and entering his service. Miss Wilfer has never known this until now. Mr. B. Now, this is a very artful dog. This is a longer-headed schemer than I thought him. See how patiently and metliodically he goes to work. "He says to himself, " I'll gi^t in with Boffin, and I'll get in with this young lady, and 111 work 'em both at the .same time, and I'll bring my pigs to market somewhere." I hear him say it, bless you ! Why, I look at him now, and I see him say it ! But luckily he hadn't to deal with the people he supposed, Bella my dear ! And he's beat, that's what he is ; regularly beat. He thought to squeeze money out of us, and he has done fcr himself instead, Bella my dear ! There's your pay, Rokesmith, (//o-oi^Z/j^ money on ihefioor.) I dare say you can stoop to pick it up, after ■what you have stooped to here. Boke. I have stooped to nothing but this ; and this is mine, for I have earned it by the hardest of hard la'ior. Mr. B. You're a pretty quick packer, I hope ; because the sooner' you are gone, bag and baggage, the better for all parties. Boke. You need have no fear of my lingering. 3Ir. B. You pretend to have a mighty admiration for this young lady ? Boke. I do not pretend. 31r. B. Oh ! Well. You have a mjghjty admiration for this young lady — since you are so particular? Boke. Yes. Mr. B. How do you reconcile that, with this young lady's fling- OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. 25 in^ up her money to the church-weathercocks, and racing oflf at a splitting pace for the workhouse ? Eoke. I don't understand you. Mr. B. Don't you ? Or won't you ? AVhat else could you have made this young lady out to be, if she had listened to such addresses as yours? Roke. What else, if I had been so happy as to win her affections and possess her heart ! Mr. B. Win her affections and possess her heart ! Mew says the cat. Quack-quack says the duck, Bow-wow-wow says the dog ! Win her affections and possess her heart ! Mew, Quack-quack, Bow-wow ! What is due to this young lady is Money, and this young lady right well knows it. Roke. You slander the young lady. Mr. B. You slander the young lady ; you with your affections and hearts and trumpery. You and your affections and hearts are a Lie, sir ! Roke. Mrs. Boffin, for your delicate and unvarying kindness I thank you with the warmest gratitude. Good-bye ! Miss Wilfer, good-bye ! Mr. B. And now, my dear, I hope you feel that you've been righted ! Bella, {starting up.) O Mr. Rokesmith, before you go, if you could but make me poor again ! Oh ! Make me poor again, some- body, I beg and pray, or my heart will break if this goes on ! Pa dear, make me poor again and take me home ! I was bad enough there, but I have been so much worse here. Don't give me money, Mr. Boffin, I won't have money. Keep it away from me, and only let me speak to good little pa, and lay my head upon his shoulder, and tell him all my griefs. Nobody else can understand me, nobody else can comfort me, nobody else knows how unworthy I am, and yet can love me like a little child. I am better with pa than any one — more innocent, more sorry, more glad ! (Throws herself at Mrs. Boffin's feet, weeping.) Mr. B. There, my dear, there. You are righted ; and it's all right. Bella. I hate you ! At least, I can't hate you, but I don't like you. Mr.B. Hullo! Bella, (rising.) You are a scolding, unjust, abusive, aggravating, bad old creature. I am angry with my ungrateful self for calling you such names, but you are ! You are ! You know you are ! I have heard you with shame ! — shame for myself, and shame for you. You ought to be above the base tale-bearing of a time-serving creature, but you are above nothing now. When I came here I honored you and respected you, and I soon loved you. But now I can^t bear the sight of you. At least, I don't know as I ought to go so far as that — only — you're a monster ! The best wish I can 26 OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. ■wish you is that you hadn't a single farthing in the world. If any true friend could make you a bankrupt you would be a duck, but as a man of property you're a — demon. Mr. Kokesmith, pray stay one moment. Pray hear one word from me before you go. 1 am deeply sorry for the reproaches you have borne on my account. Out of the depths of my heart I earnestly and truly beg your ])ardou. {Gives her hand.) Boke. God bless you ! Bella. Mr. Boffin's speeches were detestable to me, shocking to me. It is quite true that there was a time when I deserved to be so righted, but I hope that I shall never deserve it again. (RoKE. raises her hand to his lips, and exit L.) Bella. He has gone. He has been most shamefully treated, and most unjustly and basely driven away, and I am the cause of it. I must go home. I am very grateful to you for ail you have done for me, but I cannot stay here. Mrs. B. My darling girl ! Bella. No, I cannot stay here. Oh, you vicious old thing ! Mrs. B. Don't be rash, my love. Think well of what you do. Mr. B. Yes, you had better think well of what you do. Bella. I shall never more think well of yoM. And, what is more, you're wholly undeserving of the Gentleman you have lost. Mr. B. Why, you don't mean to say, Miss Bella, that you set up Rokesmith against me .►* Bella. I do ! He is worth a Million of you. I would rather he thought well of me, though he swept the street for bread, than that you did, though you splashed the mud upon him from the wheels of a chariot of pure gold — There! Mr. B. Well, I'm sure ! Bella. And for a long time past, when you have thought you set yourself above him, I have only seen you under his feet — There ! And throughout I saw in him the master-, and I saw in you the man — There ! And when you used him shamefully, I took his part and loved him — There! I boast of it. {Throws herself into a chair, and cries.) Mr. B. Now look here. Give me your attention, Bella. I am not angry. Bella. I am ! Mr. B. I say I am not angry, and I mean kindly to you, and I want to overlook this. So you'll stay where you are, and we'll agree to say no more about it. Bella {rising hurriedly.) No, I can't stay here ; I can't think of staying here. I must go home for good. Mr. B. Now don't be silly ; don't do what you're sure to be sorry for. Bella. I shall never be sorry for it ; and I should always be sorry, and should every minute of my life despise myself, if I remained here after what has happened. OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. 27 Mr. B. At least, Bella, let there be no mistake about it. Look before* you leap, you know. Stay where you are, and all's well, and all's as it was to be. Go away, and you can never come back. Bella. I know that I can never come back, and that's what I mean. Mr. B. You mustn't expect that I'm agoing to settle money on you if you leave us like this, because I am not. No, Bella ! Be careful ! Not one brass farthing. Bella. Expect ! Do you think that any power on earth could make me take it, if you did, sir? (Goes to Mrs. B. and falls on her knees before her.) You're a dear, a dear, the best of dears ! I can never be thankful enough to you, and can never forget you. If I should live to be blind and deaf, I know 1 shall see and hear you, in my fiincy, to the last of my dim old days ! Mrs. B. My dear girl ! My darling giil I My sweet pretty ' Bella {rising and going to Mr. B.) I am very glad that I called you names, sir, because you richly deserved it. But I am very sorry that I called you names, because you used to be so different. Say good-bye ! Mr. B. Good-bye. Bella. If I knew which of your hands was the least spoiled, I would ask you to let me touch it, for the last time. Mr. B. Try the left hand ; it's the least used. Bella {taking his hand.) You have been wonderfully good and kind to me, and I kiss it for that. You have been as bad as bad could be to Mr. Rokesmilh, and I throw it away for that. Thank you for myself, and good-bye ! Mr. B. Good-bye. (Bella kisses him suddenly, embraces Mrs. B., and runs out L.) Mr. B. {slapping his knees and laughing.) Ha, ha ! What do you think of me now, old lady ? Wasn't I a regular old brown one ? Mrs. B. {wiping her eyes.) O Noddy, you was so hard. Mr. B. Of course I was, old lady ; but didn't I bring her round ? Ha, ha ! {Imitating Bella.) " You're a monster ! and I never again shall think well of youl " Didn't she put it to me, old lady ? {Imitating as before.) "I hate you!" Ha, ha ! Didn't she look pretty, and didn't her little eyes snap and her little feet beat the floor? I tell you, old lady, we've done a glorious day's work. Mrs. B. But we've lost her for ever, Noddy. Mr. B. Not a bit of it. She thinks so, no doubt. But I tell you it'll be all right before we know it. Wasn't I a grisly old growler, though ? I knew she'd come through it true golden gold, and she has. Now she'll run home and John will go after her, and they'll both be happy, and we'll be hapjiy too, old lady, and bide our time. This is the happiest piece of work we've ever done, old lady, I'll be bound. {Seizes Mrs. B. round the icaist and dances withher aSout the room and out through the entrance c.) 28 OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. Scene II. — A dmgy office. Deshs, stools, &c. Doors R. and l. Window c. R. W. seated at desk, R. c, eating bread and milk. R. W. I wonder if my little Bella is really enjoying herself with all her riches and elegance. {Sighs.) When she comes to see her poor, shabby old father, she looks so lovely and is dressed so beau- tifully that I feel almost afraid she'll forget us all one of these days, after she marries the enormously wealthy husband that she talks so much about. Well, well, poor old Rumty will be sorry to lose his lovely woman, for she's a very sweet and dear little woman in spite of her mercenary ideas. God bless her ! (Bella runs in l., seizes R. W. round the neck and kisses him heartily.) Bella There, dear pa, how do you like that.'' .B. W. {breathlessly.) Very much, my dear. But, my dear, I never was so surprised ! The idea of your coming down the lane yourself. Why didn't you send the footman down the lane, my love ? Bella {sitting by his side.) I have brought no footman with me, pa. 7?. W. Oh, indeed ! But you have brought the elegant turnout, my love ? Bella. No, pa. a. W. You never can have walked, my dear ? B4la. Yes, I have, pa. R. W. The idea of a splendid — Bella. What's the matter, pa ? R. W. — of a splendid female putting up with such accommo- dation as the present. Is that a new dress you have on, dear? Bella. No, pa, an old one. Don't you remember it ? R. W. Why, I thought I remembered it, my dear ! Bella. You should, for you bought it, pa ? R. W. Yes, I though* I bought it, my dear ! Bella. And have you grown so fickle that you don't like your own taste, pa dear ? R. W. Well, my love, I should have thought it was hardly suf- ficiently splendid for existing circumstances. Bella. And so, pa, you sometimes have a quiet tea here all alone ? I am not in the tea's way, if I draw my arm over your shoulder like this, pa ? R. W. Yes, my dear ; and no, my dear. Yes. to the first question, and Certainly Not to the second. Respecting the quiet tea, my dear, why you see the occupations of the day are sometimes a little wearing ; and if there's nothing interposed between the day and your mother, why she is sometimes a little wearing too. Bella. I know, pa. R. W. Yes, my dear. So sometimes I put a quiet tea at the win- OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. 29 dow here, with a little quiet contemplation of the Lane (which comes soothing), between the day, and domestic — Bella. Bliss. R. W. And domestic Bliss. Bella. And it is in this dark dingy place of captivity, poor dear, that you pass all the hours of your life when you are not at home ? R. W. Not at home, or not on the road there, or on the road here, my love. Yes. You see that little desk in the corner ? Bella. In the dark corner, farthest both from the light and from the fireplace? The shabbiest desk of all the desks ! R. W. Now, does it really strike you in that point of view, my dear ? That's mine. That's called Rumty's Perch. Bella {indignantly.) Whose Perch ? R. W. Rumty's. You see, being rather high and up two steps, they call it a Perch. And they call me Rumty. Bella. How dare they ! R. W. They're playful, Bella my dear; they're playful. They're more or less younger than I am, and they're playful. What does it matter ? I might be Surly, or Sulky, or fifty disagreeable things that I really shouldn't like to be considered. But Rumty ! Lor, why not Rumty ? {Resumes eating.) Bella {after a pause.) Pa dear, don't be cast down, but I must tell you something disagreeable. R. W. {not heeding Bella.) My gracious me ! This is very ex- traordinary. Bella. What is, pa ? R. W. {looking out of window.) Why here's Mr. Rokesmith now! Bella. No, no, pa, no ; surely not. R. W. Yes, there he is ! Look here ! Enter Rokesmith, l. He comes forward quickly, and as Bella rises, catches her in his arms. Roke. My dear, dear girl ; my gallant, generous, disinterested, courageous, noble girl ! {B^hhK lays her head on his shoulder.) I knew you would come to him, and I followed you. My love, my life 1 You are mine ? Bella. Yes, I am yours, if you think me worth taking, {A pause.) But we must think of dear pa. I haven't told dear pa : let us speak to pa. R. W. {faintly.) I wish first, my dear, that you'd have the kind- ness to sprinkle me with a little milk, for I feel as if I was — Going. Bella (kisses R. W. and makes him drink some milk.) We'll break it to you gently, dearest pa. R. W. My dear, you broke so much in the first — Gush, if I may so express myself — that I think I am equal to a good large brea/i age now. 30 OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. Eolce. Mr. Wilfer, Bella takes me, though I have no fortune, even no present occupation ; nothing but what I can get in the life before us. Bella takes me ! {Embraces her.) B. W. Yes, I should rather have inferred, my dear sir, that Bella took you, from what I have within these few minutes remarked. Bella. You don't know, pa, how ill 1 have used hira ! Hoke. You don't know, sir, what a heart she has ! Bella. You don't know, pa, what a shocking creature I was growing, when he saved me from myself! Boke. You don't know, sir, what a sacrifice she has mad:? for me ! B. W. My dear Bella, and my dear John Rokesmith, if you will allow me so to call you — Bella. Yes do, pa, do ! 1 allow you, and my will is his law. Isn't it — dear John Rokesmith ? (RoKE. embraces Bella again.) B. W. I think, my dears, that if you could make it convenient to sit one on one side of me, and the other on the other, we should get on rather more consecutively, and make things rather plainer. (They sit one on each side of R. \V.) John Rokesmith mentioned, a while ago, that he had no jiresent occupation. Boke. None. Bella. No, pa, none. B. W. From which I argue that he has left Mr. Boffin. Bella. Yes, pa. And so — B. W. Stop a bit, my dear. I wish to lead up to it by degrees. And that Mr. Boffin has not treated hira well ? Bella. Has treated him most shamefully, dear pa ! B. W. Of which a certain mercenary young person distantly re- lated to myself could not approve ? Am I leading up to it right? Bella. Could not approve, sweet pa. B. W. Upon which the certain mercenary young person distantly related to myself, having previously observed and mentioned to myself that prosperity was spoiling Mr. Boffin, felt that she must not sell her sense of what was right and what was wrong, and what was true and what was fdse, and what was just and what was unjust, for any price that could be paid to her by any one alive ? Am I leading up to it right ? Bella. Yes, pa. B. W. And therefore — and therefore this mercenary young per- son distantly related to myself refused the price, took off the splen- did fashions that were part of it, put on the comparatively poor dress that I had last given her, and trusting to my supporting her in what was right, came straight to me. Have I led up to it ? Bella {stealing her arm round his neck.) Yes, pa dear. B. W. The mercenary young person distantly related to myself did well ! The mercenary young person distantly related to myself did not trust me in vain ! I admire this mercenary young person distantly related to myself more in this dress than if she had come to me in China silks, Cashmere shawls, and Golconda diamonds. I OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. 31 love this young: person clearly. I say to the man of this young per- son's heart, out of my heart and with all of it, " My blessing on this engagement betwixt you, and she brings you a good fortune when she brings you the poverty she has accepted for your sake and the honest truth's ! " (Kisses Bella, and shakes Roke. by the hand. ) Bella. Thank you, pa dear, for being so good to your little wilful Bella. Boke. I thank }-ou, sir, for my Bella and myself. B. W. {lightly.) Well, well, now let's be merry. Here is another loaf and plenty more milk, and if it isn't a very sumptuous repast, we can be just as happy as the three bears in their house in the forest. {Laughing.) I'll be the great big large bear. Boke {gaily.) And I the middle-sized bear. Bella (taking a hand of each.) And 1 the little, small, wee bear. Only, pa dear, and John, you must not eat up the poor little wee bear, because she's a very weak and silly little bear, and you are such great, wise, strong bears. Boke. My darling ! B. W. My own little Bella ! Bella. And now, pa dear, and John, I'll set the stylish table with the elegant repast, and we'll all be happy and comfortable. {They prepare to eat.) Act Drop. 32 OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. ACT IV. Scene. — Same as Act I. Mrs. Wilfer, sitting l. Lavvy setting table R. c. George S., with cane in mouth, extreme R., gazing at Lavvy. R. W. changing coat and boots for dressing-gown and slippers, L. C, as curtain rises. Mrs. W. You do not, R. W., inquire for your daughter Bella. R. W. To be sui-e, my dear, I did omit it. How — or perhaps I should rather say where — is Bella ? Mrs. W. {folding her arms.) Not here. E. W. Oh, indeed, my dear ! Mrs. W. Not here. In a word, R. W., you have no daughter Bella. B. W. No daughter Bella, my dear ? Mrs. W. No. Your daughter Bella has bestowed herself upon a Mendicant. B. W. Good gracious, my dear ! Mrs. W. Show your father his daughter Bella's letter, Lavinia. I think your father will admit it to be documentary proof of what I tell him. I believe your father is acquainted with his daughter Bella's writing. But 1 do not know. He may tell you he is not. Nothing will surprise me. Lavcy, {handing letter to R. W.) Posted at Greenwich and dated this morning. Hopes Ma won't be angry, but is happily married to Mr. John Rokesmich, and didn't mention it beforehand to avoid words, and please tell darling you, and love to me, and I should like to know what you'd have said if any other unmarried member of the family had done it ! {Sits close by George's side with a con- descending air.) R. W. {reading the letter.) Dear me ! Airs. W. You may well say " Dear me ! " R. W. Dear me ! Mrs. W. You said that before. R. W. {sitting.) It's very surprising. But I suppose, my dear, that we must make the best of it? Would you object to my point- ing out, my dear, that Mr. John Rokesmith is not (so far as I am acquainted with him), strictly speaking, a Mendicant. lilrs. W. Indeed ? Truly so ? I was not aware that Mr. John Rokesmith was a gentleman of landed property. But I am much relieved to hear it. R. W. {meekly.) I doubt if you have heard it, my dear. Mrs. W. Thank you. I make false statements, it appears. So be it. If my daughter flies in my face, surely my husband may. OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. 33 The one thing is not more unnatural than the other. There seems a fitness in the arrani^cment. By all means ! Law;/. Ma, I must say I think il would be much better if you would keep to the point, and not hold forth about people's flying into pcojjle's faces, w'hich is nothing more nor less than impossible nonsense. Mrs. W. How ! Latvij. Just im-pos^ible nonsense, ma ; and Georije Sampson knows it is, as well as 1 do. The true point i-, thi.t Bella has be- haved iii a most unisteily way to m", and might have severely com- promised me with George and with George's family, by making off and getting married in this very low and disreputable maimer — V ith some pew-opener or other, I suppose, for a bridesmaid — when she ought to have confided in me, and ought to have said, " If, Lavvy, you consider it due to your engagement with George, that you should countenance the occasion by being present, then. Lavvy, I beg you to be )}resent, keeping my secret from ma and pa." As of course I should have done. Mrs. W. As of course you would have done ? Ingrate ! Viper ! George S. {risivg and feebly advancing ) I say! You know, ma'am. Upon my honor you mustn't. With the highest respect for you, ma'am, upon my life you mustn't. No really, you know. When a man with the feelings of a gentleman finds himself engaged to a young lady, and it comes (even on the part of a member of the family) to vipers, you know ! — I would merely put it to your own good feeling, you know. (Mrs. W. rises and glares at Geoiige S.) Lavvy, {rising and stepping tragically between them.) My own unnatural mother wants to annihilate George! But you shan't be annihilated, George. I'll die first! {Flings her arms round his neck and clings to him with a melodramatic air.) George S. {shaking his head at Mrs. W.) With every sentiment of respect for you, you know, ma'am — vipers really doesn't do you credit. Lavvy, {wildly.) You shall not be annihilated, George! Ma shall destroy me first, and then she'll be contented. Oh, oh, oh ! Have I lured George from his happy home to expose him to this ? George dear, be free ! Leave me, ever dearest George, to ma and to my fate. Give my love to your aunt, George, and implore her not to curse the viper that has crossed your path and blighted your existence. Oh, oh, oh! {Falls into mock hysterics in his arms; he deposits her in chair C, where she remains moaning and sobbing extravagantly.) George S. {bending over Lavvy.) Demon — with the highest re- spect for you, ma'am — behold your work ! Lavvy, {faintly.) George dear, are you safe ? Geoi-ge love, what has happened? Where is ma.-* (George assists her to Mrs. W., who kisses her forehead ; he then returns her to chair c.) George dear, I am afraid I have been foolish ; but I am still a little 3 34 OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. weak and giddy ; don't let go my hind, George. George dear,, after what has passed, I am sure ma will teil pa that he may tell Bella we shall all be glad to see her and her husband. George S. I am sure of it. I eminently respect Mrs. Wilfcr, and ever must, and ever shall. Never more eminently than after what has ])asscd. Mrs. W. {in a very deep voice.) Far he it from me to run counter to the feelings of a child of mine, arid of a Youth who is the object of her maiden preference. I may feci — nay, know — that I have been deluded and deceived. I may feel — nay, know — that I have been set aside and ])assed over. I may feel — nay, know — that after having so far overcome my repugnance toward Mr. and Mrs. Boffin as to receive them under this roof, and to consent to your daughter Bella's residing under theirs, it were well if your daughter Bella had profited in a worldly point of view by a connection so dis- tasteful, so disreputable. I may feel — nay, know — that in uniting herself to Mr. Rokesmith she has united herself to one who is, in spite of shallow sophistry, a Mendicant. And I may feel well as- sured that your daughter Bella does not exalt her family by be- coming a Mendicant's bride. But I suppress what I feel, and say nothing of it. George S. This is the sort of thing, ma'am, that a man must expect, you know, from one who has ever been an example in her family, and never an outrage. Never more so, ma'am, than after what has passed. I shall never forget, ma'am, the touching feelings that your conduct has awakened within me. And Lavinia's also, whom I respect with a feeling little less than — divine. Yes, ma'am, I hope there isn't a man with a beating heart, ma'am, that isn't ca- pable of — yes — of — yes certainly, to be sure. {Restores cane to his mouth, and sits confused.) Mrs. W. Therefore, R. W., let your daughter Bella come when she will, and she will be received. So — so. will her husband. Lacvy. And I beg, pa, that you will not tell Bella what I have undergone. It can do no good, and it might cause her to reproach herself. George S. My deaiest girl, she ought to know it. Lavvy. No, dearest George, let it be buried in oblivion. George S. Too noble ! Laevy. Nothing is too noble, dearest George. And I hope, pa, that you will avoid mentioning George's rising prospects when Bella is present. It might seem like taunting her with her own poor for- tunes. Let me ever remember that I am her younger sister, and ever spare her painful contrasts, which could not but wound her deeply. George S. Ah, such is the demeanor of Angels ! Lacvy. No, dearest George, I am but too well aware that I am merely human. OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. 35 Mi's. W. {suddenly turning to R. W.) Can you think of your (laughter Bella, and slkep ? 11. W. {waking.) Yes — I think I can, my dear. Mrs. IV. Then I would recommend you, if you have a human feeling, to retire to bed. R. W. Thank you, my dear ; but I think we will have a little supper first. {Goes to table.) Lavvy. George ! Ma's chair. (George folloios Mrs. W. to table and places chair for her ; she glaring at him. They sit at table, Mrs. W. facing audience l. Lavvy same, R. George and R. W. beside them in front. Leave space behind table for Bella and Roke. R. W. cuts loaf and helps all.) Laccy. Now, ma and pa, tell me if I wasn't right about those Boffins. George Sampson, speak ! What did I tell vou about those Boffins ? George S. {murmvring.) Yes, indeed. Lavvy. Yes ! I told George Sampson, as George Sampson tells you, that those hateful Boffins would pick a quari-el with Bella, as soon as her novelty had worn off. (George passes his arm round her tcaist, but toithdraws it with a sharp exclamation.) You must be careful, George. As I was saying, those Boffins have behaved in a detestable manner, and as Bella's sister and an engaged young lady — {Geokg^ essays as before) Lookout, George, you'll prick yourself again — I feel bound to express my opinion of them. R. W. Will you have a little of the salad, my dear? Mrs. W. I thank you, R. W. Lavvy. I wish to goodness, ma, that you'd loll a little. Mrs. W. How! Loll! Lavvy. Yes, ma. Mrs. W. I hope I am incapable of it. Lavvy. I am sure you look so, ma. But why one should sit at one's own table as if one's under-petticoat was a backboard, I do not understand. Mrs. W. Neither do I understand how a young lady can mention the garment in the name of which you have indulged. I blush for you. Lavvy. Thank you, ma ; but I can do it for myself, I am obliged to you, when there's any occasion. George S. After all, you know, ma'am, we all know it's there. Mrs. W. AVe know it's there ! Lavvy. Really, George, I must say that I don't understand your allusions, and that I think you might be more delicate and less per- sonal. George S. Go it ! Oh yes ! Go it. Miss Lavinia Wilfer ! Lavvy. What you may mean, George Sampson, by your omni- bus-driving expressions, I cannot pretend to imagine. Neither do 36 OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. I wish to imagine. It is enough for me to know in my own heart that I am not going to — ^o it. George S. Oh yes ! Thus it ever is. I never — Lavvy. If you mean to say that you never brought up a young gazelle, you may save yourself the trouble, because nobody supposes that you' ever did. We know you better. Mrs. W. Mr. Sampson, I cannot permit you to misrepresent the intentions of a child of mine. Lavvij. Let him alone, nia. It is indifferent to me what he says or does. George S. Dearest Lavinia, I adore you ! Lavvy. Then, if you can't do it in a more agreeable manner, I wish you wouldn't. George S. I also respect you, ma'am, to an extent which must ever be iielow your merits, I am well aware, but still up to an un- common mark. I am painfully conscious of my own unworthiness. Is it not pardonable if I feel sensitive, ma'am, when I see a disposi- tion on the part of my adorable Lavinia to take me up short ? Lavvy. George, notwithstanding all these surroundings, I am yours — as yet. How long that may last is another question, but I am yours as yet. Enter Bella and Rokesmith, l. Bella. Dearest ma, how do you do, dearest ma P And Lavvy dar- ling, how do you do ? And George, how do you do ? And when are you going to be married, and how rich are you going to grow ? You must tell me all about it presently. {Throws off her hat and sits at table.) Dearest pa, how do you do? good dear little pa! John dear, kiss Ma and Lavvy, and then we shall all be at home and comfortable. (lloKE. kisses Mils. W. and Lavvy, and then sits beside Bella.) Now let me pour out the tea. Dearest Ma and Lavvy, you both take sugar I know. I didn't before I was married, but I do now, because John does. Cut some more bread and butter, John, there's a love ! Ma likes hers doubled. And, John dear, did you kiss Ma and Lavvy ? Oh you did ? Well, I only asked because I didn't see you. Lavvy. What's the matter, ma, ain't you well ? Mrs. W. {icho has been glaring motionless at Bella.) Doubtless I am very well. What should be the matter with me ? Lavvy. You don't seem very brisk, ma. Mrs. W. Brisk ! brisk ! Whence the low expression, Lavinia ? If I am uncomplaining, if I am silently contented with my lot, let that suffice for my family. George S. Yes, ma'am, to be sure. Bella. And now you must tell me, dearest Ma and Lavvy, upon your words and honors ! Didn't you for a moment — just a moment — think I was a dreadful little wretch when I wrote to say OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. 37 1 had run away? I think it must have made you rather crnss. But you see I had "been such a heedless, heartless creature, and had led you so to expect that I shouI:l marry for money, that I was sly about it, and so I said to John that if he liked to take me without any fuss, he might. And as he did like, I let iiim. Mis. W. On a day hke this, the mind naturally reverts to papa and mamma. (I here allude to my parents.) I was considered tall ; perhaps I was. Papa and mamma were unquestionably tall. I have rarely seen a finer woman than my mother ; never than my father. Lavvij. Whatever grandpapa was, he wasn't a female. 3Irs. W. Your grandpapa was what I describe him to have been, and would have struck any of his grandchildren to the earth who presumed to question it. It was one of mamma's cherished hopes that I should become united to a tall member of society. M imma would appear to have had an indefinable foreboding of what after- wards happened, for she would fi equently urge upon me, " Not a little man. Premise me, my child, not a little man. Never, never, never marry a little man." Among the most prominent members of that distinguished circle, was a gentleman measuring six feet four in height. He was not an engraver. George S. No, ma'am, of course not. Mrs. W. This gentleman was so obliging as to honor me with attentions which I could not fail to understand. George S. When it comes to that you know, you can always tell, ma'am. Mrs. W. I immediately announced to both my parents that those attentions were misplaced, and that I could not favor his suit. They inquired was he too tall ? I replied it was not the stature, but the intellect was too lofty. I well remember mamma's clasping her hands, and exclaiming " This will end in a little man ! " Within a month I first saw R. W., my husband. Within a year I married him. It is natural for the mind to recall these dark coincidences on the present day. B. W. My dear, I am really afraid you are not enjoying yourself. Mrs. W. On the contrary, R. W., quite so. Bella. And now you will naturally want to know, dearest ma and Lavvy, how we live and what we have got to live upon. Well ! And so we live on Blackheath, in the charm-ingest of dolls' houses, de-lightfully furnished ; and we have a hundred and fifty pounds a year, and we have all we want, and more. And lastly, if you would like to know in confidence, as perhaps you may, what is my opinion of my husband, my opinion is — that I almost love him ! Boke. And if you would like to know in confidence, as perhaps you may, my opinion of my wife, my opinion is — Bella. Stop, sir ! No, John dear ! Seriously ! Please not yet a while ! I want to be something so much worthier than the doll ia the dolls' house. Boke. My darling, are you not ? 38 OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. Bella. Not half, not a quarter, so much worthier as I hope you will some day find me ! Try me through some reverses, John, and tlien tell me what you think of me. Pioke. I will, my Life. I promise it. Bella. That's my d ar John ! And you won't speak a word now ; will you ? Boke. And I won't speak a word now ! Bella. I'll go further, Pa, and Ma, and Lavvy. John don't suspect it — he has no idea of it — but I quite love him ! licike. And nmv may I speak a word, my dear ? Bella. Yes, John dear, now I'll allow you. Boke. (rishifju) My love, now that we are all here together, and so h;ippy and contented, I have a little surprise for you. Bella, Another surprise, John ? Boke. Yes. (Goes io door L. and admits Mr. and Mrs. Bof- fin.) And I hope a pleasant one. Bella (rising and meeting Mrs. B.) Dear, kind Mrs. Boffin. Mrs. B. My dearest dear darling, sweet pretty pretty. (Em- braces BelL-^.) And here is Noddy too, my child; don't you see him ? Bella. Yes, but — I thought — Air. B. (shaking her by the hand.) Never mind what you thought, Bella my dear. Ha ! ha ! John understands all about it ; so does the old lady. Bella. John understands ? But what does it all mean ? B. IV. (bringing chairs forward, c.) Hadn't you better .offer your visitors some chairs, my dear ? Bella. Yes, pa ; but — I am so bewildered, I quite forgot. Mrs. B. Come, deary, sit right here by me ; and John you sit the other side ; and then we shall be comfortable. (Mrs. B. and Bella sit in chairs c. RoKE. sits at Bella's left. Mr. B. sits R. c.) Mrs. W. (advancing down C) Pardon me ! But when persons comparatively unknown to this household enter here, after wiiat has transpired in regard to my daughter Bella, it were surely fitting in one who claims to be a parent, though a humble one, to seek to know their design. Mr. B. (rising and shaking Mrs. W.'s hand.) I hope you'll ex- cuse us, ma'am, and I'm sure you will after you've heard the story. Lord bless us, the old lady'U fix it up in a minute. Mrs. W. Pardon me! but it were — Lavvy. Oh lor, ma, don't make such a fuss about nothing. Mrs. W. How! Lavvy. I say don't make such a fuss about just nothing at all; and pray don't stand staring at me in that intensely aggravating manner ! If you see a black on my nose, tell me so ; if you don't, leave me alone. Mrs. W. Do you address Me in those words ? Do you presume ? OUR MUTUAL FRIEXD. 39 Lavvy. Don't talk about presuming, ma, for goodness sake ! A girl who is old enough to be engaged, is quite old enough to object to be stared at as if she was a Clock. Mrs. W. Audacious one ! Your grandmamma, if so addressed by one of her daughters, at any age, would have insisted on her re- tiring to a dark apartment. Lavvy. My grandmamma wouldn't have stood staring people out of countenance, I think. Mrs. W. She would ! Lavvy. Then it's a pity she didn't know better. A pretty exhibi- tion my grandmamma must have made of herself! I wonder whether she ever insisted on peo])le's retiring into the ball of St. Paul's ; and if she did, how she got them there ! Mrs. W. Silence ! I command silence ! Lavvy. I have not the slightest intention of being silent, ma, but quite the contrary. I am not going to be eyed as if I was a nat- ural curiosity, and sit silent under it. I am not going to have George Sampson eyed, and sit silent under it. Oeorge 8. No, certainly not, ma'am, you know. Mrs. W. If Mr. George Sampson, as a friend of this family, chooses to join with other members in setting aside and passing over your wife, R. W., she has nothing to say. It is quite fitting and appropriate, R. W. R. W. (bringing chair forward to K. c.) My dear, will you have a chair.P Mrs. W. Thank you, R. W., no ! My place is not here. (Mrs. W. turns, walks to extreme R. and sits stiffly. Lavvy and George S. push back table and clear it during the following.) B. W. {sitting R. c.) Just as you like, my dear. (A pause, during which Mrs. B. rocks herself back and forward, laughing, clapping her hands, and embracing Bella by turns.) Mr. B. {sitting R. c.) Old lady, old lady, if you don't begin, some- body else must. Mrs. B. I"m agoing to begin. Noddy, my dear ; only it isn't easy for a person to know where to begin, when a person is in this state of delight and happiness. Bella, my dear — tell me, who's this ? {pointing to RoKESMlTH.) Bella. Who's this ? My husband. Mrs. B. Ah ! But tell me his name, deary ! Bella. Rokesmilh. Mrs. B. No, it ain't ! Not a bit of it. Bella (bewildered.) At least his name is John, I suppose? Mrs. B. Ah! I should think so, deary! I should hope so! Many and many is the time I have called him by his name of John. But what's his other name, his true other name ? Give a guess, my pretty ! 40 OUR MUTUAL FRIEXD. Bella (faintly.) I can't guess. Mis. B. I eoulci, and what's more, I did ! I fouad him out, all in a flash as I may say, one night. Didn't I, Noddy ? Mr. B. Ay •' That the old'^ lady did ! Mrs. B. Harkee to me, deary. It was after a particular night when John had been disappointed — as he thought — in his affec- tions. It was after a night when John hud made an offer to a cer- tain young lady, and the certain young lady had refused it. It was the very next nigiit. My Noddy wanted a paper out of his Secre- tary's room, and I says to Noddy, " I am going by the door, and 111 ask hini for it." I tapped at his door, and he didn't hear me. I looked in, and saw him a-silting lonely by his fire, brooding over it. He chanced to look up with a pleased kind of smile in my company when he saw me, and then in a single moment, Bella my precious, I knew him ! Yes ; too many a time had I seen him, when he was a little child, in need of being brightened up with a comforting word! Too many and too many a time to be mistaken, when that glimpse of him come at last! No, no ! I knew it was John! So what might you think by this time that your husband's name was, dear? Bella. Not Harmon .'' That's not possible ! Mrs. B. Don't tremble. Why not possible, deary, when so many things are possible ? Bella. He was killed. Mrs. B. Thought to be. But if ever John Harmon drew the breath of life on earth, that is certainly John Harmon's arm round your waist now, my pretty. If ever John Harmon had a wife on earth, that wife is certainly you. Bella. John, O John ! I — cannot understand it all. Bok-e. My darling, what Mrs. Boffin says is true. I was sup- posed to be killed, and was even suspected of my own murder ; but I am John Harmon, the very John Harmon who was left to you in old Mr. Harmon's will. Bella. Oh, I see it all now ! Dear, good, unselfish John ! You gave up everything, name, ^rtune, and position, for my sake — that I might not be forced into marrying you, you dear, splendid old John! Boke. Yes, you have guessed the secret, dear. Mrs. W. It seems, R. W., that your daughter Bella's husband is not what he has hitherto represented himself to be. You will per- haps remember my dark forebodings at the hour when he entered our abode. B. W. But, my dear, think how much better it is for Bella and all of us. Lavvy. Yes, ma, think of being deprived of the privilege of being a Mendicant's mamma ! Mrs. W. Peace, Lavinia ! It is as you think, R. W., not as I do. Mrs. B. But that isn't all yet, my beauty. Bless you, it wa.sn't John only that was in the secret. We was all of us in it. OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. 41 Bella. But — I don't understand — Mrs. B. Of course you don't, my deary. How can you till you're told ! So now I am going to tell you. Once, twice, three times, and the horses is off. Here they go ! When Noddy and me found out that this was our little John, and that we was living on his rightful property, you should have seen how frightened ray Noddy was ; and says lie. " Old lady, we must give it all back to John and make him happy." But you see John wouldn't do that on account of a certain lovely wom;m. This naturally brings up a confabula- tion regarding the certain fair young person ; when Noddy gives it as his opinion that she is a deary creetur. " She may be a leetle spoilt, and nat'rully spoilt," he says, " by circumstances, but that's only on the surface ; and I lay my life," he says, " that she's the true golden gold at heart." Mr. B. That's it, that's it ! And you said so too, old lady. Mrs. B. Don't you mind him, my dear ; stick to me. Then says John, O, if he could but prove so ! Then we both of us ups and says that minute, "Prove so!" "What will content you ?" says we. " If she was to stand up for you when you was slighted, if she was to show herself of a generous mind when you was oppressed, if she was to be truest to you when you was poorest and friendliest, and all this against her own seeming interest, how would that do ? " " Do ! " says John ; " it would raise me to the skies." Mr. B. " Then," says I, " make your preparations for the ascent, John, it being my firm belief that up you go." Mrs. B. And then he began, Bella my precious ; and Lord bless us, how he did begin ! Mr. B. I was a i-egular grisly old growler, wasn't I, Bella my dear ? Ha, ha ! " Mew," says the cat, " Bow wow," says the dog, "Quack quack," says the duck. Ha! ha! ha! {^Walks about, laughing.) Bella {risi7ig.) Oh, now I see it all. You dear, dear Mr. BofRn ! You didn't mean it, after all. ( Goes to him and shakes his hand in both of hers.) And, Mrs. Boffin, how kind and good you were to me when I was such a little wretch. {Embraces her ; she rises.) And John too, all of you doing everything to bring good-for-nothing little me to my senses. {Going to R. W.,who rises.) Pa dear, why is it that you all have been so kind and considerate with me ? Dear, good little Pa ! And Ma dear, now you see how good and kind my Mr. and Mrs. Boffin have been to me. Airs. W. {rising.) The claims of Mr. and Mrs. Boffin upon my child are doubtless of paramount importance. It is quite fitting, R. W., that such should be the case. Bella. But is the story done? Is there no more of it? Mrs. B. What more of it should there be, deary ? . Bella. Are you sure you have left nothing out of it ? Mrs. B. 1 don't think I have. Bella. Then, sir, please, I've something to say to you. {Ih Mr. 42 OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. B., uiho stands c.) Please I beg your pardon, and I made a small mistake of a word when I took leave of you last. Please I have found out something not yet mentioned. Please I don't believe you are a hard-hearted miser at all, and please I don't believe you ever for one single minute were ! Mrs. B. That's it, my deary ; he pretended it all, and O my, how he did it! Mr. B. I assure you, my dear, that on that celebrated day I made what has since been agreed upon to be my grandest demon- stration — I allude to Mew says the cat. Quack quack says the duck, and Bow-wow-wow says the dog. Never thought of it afore the moment, my dear ! When John said, if he had been so happy as to win your affections and possess your heart, it come into my head to turn round upon him with " Win her affections and possess her heart ! Mew says the cat. Quack quack says the duck, and Bow-wow- wow says the dog." I couldn't tell you how it come into my head or where from, but it had so much the sound of a rasper that I own to you it astonished myself. I was awful nigh bursting out a-laughing though, when it made John stare ! Ha, ha, ha ! Mrs. B. Well now. my dear, here we all are, and your mother and father 's agreed, and Noddy and me 's so happy in telling you, and the horses is in, and the story is done, and God bless you, my Beauty, and God bless us all. Mrs. Boffin. Bella. Mr. Boffin. Rokesmith. R. WiLFER. Lavvy. Mrs. WiLFER. Geo. Sampson. Curtain. Always Get the Best. 50 of the Choicest Selections in the M Reading Club and Handy Speaker. Edited by Geokge M. Bakisr. ■e, cloth, SO cents; paper, IS cents. CONTENTS. The Red Jacket .... George M. Baker. Old Age Miihmoud Leigh Hunt. The Closet Scene from "Hamlet" How he saved St. Michael's . Aldine. Samson The Story of the Bad Little Boy who didn't come to Grief. Mark Ticain. Mr. Caudle and his Second Wife . Douglas JerrokVs Fireside Saints Taiiler Whitticr. The Doorstep E. 0. Stedman. Old Farmer Gr.iy gets photographed Mr. O'Gallagher's Three Koads to Learning Capt. Murryat. The Jester's Sermon Walter- Thornburij. '< The Boofer Lady "... Dickens's " Mutual Friend."* Deliunco of Harold the Dauntless . Scott. Battle Hymn Korner. The Story of the Faithful Soul Adelaide Procter. " Curfew must not ring To-ISTight " The Showman's Courtship How Terry saved his Bacon . The Senator's Pledge Charles Sumner. Overthrow of Belshazzar Harry Cornwall. The Hour of Prayer Mrs. Ilcmam. The Squire's Story .... John Phaenix. The Happiest Couple Sheridan. Godiva Tennyson. Farmer Bent's Sheep-Washing . The Deutsch Maud MuUer . Cart Prctsel. Charles Sumner .... Carl Schurz. The Bricklayers . • . . G. H. Barnes. A Stranger in the Pew . Harper's 3Iag. The Mistletoe-Bough . . . Bayley. Tlie Puzzled Census-Taker . J. G. Saxe The Voices at the Throne I. Westwood. Hans Breitmann's Party . Charles G. Leland. Hob Roy MacGregor Walter Scott. Der Drummer The Yankee and the Dutchman's Dog Popping the Question . The Bumpkin's Courtship The Happy Life . . . . Sir Henry Wotton. At the Soldiers' Graves . Robert Collyer. Nobody there Anoni/mous. The Factory-Girl's Diary . Morton. Jn the Tunnel ..... "Jones" The Whistler " Good and Better "... Sold by all booksellers and publishers, and sent by mail, postpaid, on receipt of price. LEF & SHEPARD, Publishers, Boston. Toa will find one of your Favorites among 50 of the Choicest Selections In the M Reading Club and Handy Speaker, Eilited by George M. Baker. Price, cloth, 60 cents; paper. Id cents. CONTENTS. John Brownjohn. DickeiiK. Mm. II. A. Bingham, Elisabeth Kilhum. It. II. Stodihird. John II. Yates. Miss Mnloch. Shakspeare. John G. Whittier, John G. Saxe. Mark Twain. Alfred Perceval GraMI, Priest. Sheridan Knowlet. The Rescue .... The I'ickwickians on Ice . A Picture Tube's Monument The Two Anchors .... The Old Ways and the New . By the Ahna River . Trial Scene from "Merchant of V The Sisters .... Farm- Yard Song ... The Fortune-Hunter . . Curing a Cold .... In the Bottom Drawer Two Irish Idyls Over the Ri;'er . . . . , The Modest Cousin . . . , Biddy's Troubles ... The Man with a Cold in his Head Harry and I . . . . The Shadow on the Wall The Little Puzzler . A Traveller's Evening Song . Calling a Boy in the Morning . Cooking and Courting A Tragical Tale of the Tropics The Paddock Elms ... The Bobolink .... Toothache .... The Opening of the Piano Press On .... The Beauty of Youth Queen Mab . . . .' A Militia General Address of Spottycus Our Visitor, and what he came for " What's the Matter with that Nose Workers and Thinkers The Last Ride . Baby Atlas Possession There is no Death The Learned Negro Nearer, my God, to Thee A Short Sermon &oin' Home To-day The Broken Pitcher A Baby's Soliloquy The Double Sacrifice Sunday Morning The Quaker Meeting 9old by all booksellers and newsdealers, or sent by mail on receipt cfpri*^ LEE & SHEPARD, Publishers, Boston. Sarah M. B. PiaU. Mrs. Uemans. B. E. Wool/. Aldine. Atlantic Monthly. Park Benjamin. Theodore Parker, liomeo and Juliet. Thomas Concin. Chtr Fat Contributor. Riiskin. Mora Perry. (keen Meredith. Sir E. Bulwcr Lytton. Congregationalist. Sarah F. Adams. Not hxi a Ilard-Shell Baptist W. M. Carleion. Anonymous. Arthur William Austin. George A. Bakir, Jan. Samuel Lover. You will find the Piece you are looking for among SO of the Choicest Selections in the !fo.3 Reading Club and Handy Speaker. Edited by George M. Baker. Price, cloth, SO cents; paper, IS cents. CONTENTS. Man Fra Giixcomo Bob Ci-iitchit's Christmas-Dinner TlK- First Snow-Fall . TliL' CJuuiitcss and the Serf Aurelia's Unfortunate Youn; Losj^es .... Mad Luce The Sokmn Book-Agent What the Old Man said Bone and Sinevv and Brain I'at and the OyKtors Twilight Tlie Singer . Speech of the Tlon. Ptrvese Pcahody on llie Acquisition of Cuba Bunker Hill .... Two Births .... The Old Fogy Man Auction Mad .... The Wedding. Fee . Sclineider's Tomatoes . The Wolves .... The Ballad of the Oysterman Th(! Decklland and the Mule A Lay of Ileal Life Kidiiig Down .... The Minute-men of 75 Uncle Reuben's Baptism How I'ersimmons took Cah ob der Baby The Evils of Ignorance Scenes from the School of Reform Ambition The Victories of Peace For Love 'J'he Flower-Mission, junior The Sons of New England . The .lonesville Singin' Quire The Last Tilt .... The Burial of the Dane Appeal in Behalf of American Liberty The Church of the Best Licks . The Roman Soldier. Destruction of culaueum .... Temperance Uoast Pig. A Bit of Lamb . Siniilia Similibus .... Two Loves and a Life . The Recantation of Galileo . Mosquitoes The Law of Kindness ; or, The Old man's Ii;iilway Signal . Ode Mr. Stiver's Horse StUi by Her- Hohert Buchanan. IJUkenx. ■Jumen /itmse/l Loivelt. J. Shividun Knoioles. Mark Tuain. Francis lironme. All the Year Hound. Dftroil Free Press. Alice Hobbins. John Boyle O'Reilly. Spanish Oijpsy. Alice Williams. George IT. Calvert. Charles J, Sprague. Wo-j R jr. Streeter. Charles F. Adams. J. T. Trowbridge. Oliver Wendell Ifolmea. Tom ITood. Nora Perry. George William Curtis. Vicksburg Herald. St. Nicholas. Horace Mann. Thomas Morton. Ill nry Clay. Charles Sumner. Earl Marble. lion, George B. Loring. My Opinions and Betsey BobbH, Henry B. Hirst. llmry Howard Brownell. Story. Edward Eggleston. Atherslone. Wendell Phillips. Charles Lamb. William Saroyer. Francis E. Raleigh. K. K. Elihu Burritt. George Sennott. The hanbury Neios Man. booksellers and newsdealers, and sent by mail, postpaid, on receipt of price. LEE & SHEPARD, Publishers, Boston. Ho, It you are looking for Something New, you will find tt among ^ 50 of the Choicest Selections in the Eeading Club and Handy Speaker. Edited by George M. Baker. rrice, vloth, 60 cenU; paper, IS cents. CONTENTS. The Tramp Joan of Arc Dfcoration Minot's Ledge . • ,; , Scene from " The Hunchback Widder Green's Last Words The Cane-Bottomed Chair The House-Top Saint . Tom . . . • The Song of the Dying . Mv Neighb^.'s Baby " The I'aper Don't Say " The Po8t-Boy . . What is a Minority? Itobert of Lincoln . Daddy Worthless . Zenobia's Defence . William Tell . . Mary Maloney's Philosophy Custer's Last Charge Mother's Fool • ^ • •, , The Little Black Eyed Rebel " The Palace o' the King " Grandfather . • . • " Business " in Mississippi The Indian's Claim . The Battle-Flag of Sigurd The Way Astors are Made Mr. W:itkins celebrates . Tlie Palmetto .and the Pine Pip's Fi^'ht . . • • Cuddle Doon . . . The Hot Itoasted Chestnut . St. John the Aged . The Bell of Atri Mr. O'HooUihan's Mistake The Little Hero . _• The Village Sewing-riociety He Giveth His Beloved Sleep The Dignity of Labor . A Little Shoe . . • " The Penny Ye Meant to 'ii < A Question The Cobbler's Secret The Lost Cats . • • The Pride of Battery B . Leedle Y.awcob Strauss . Two Portraits . Elder Sni tiles' Courtship Goin' Somewhere . Sold by all booksellers and George 3r. Baker. JJeQtiincey. T. W. Iligginwn. Filsjumes O'Brien. Sheridan Knowles. Thackeray. Mrs. J. D. Chaplin. Constance Fenhnori Mrs. C. J. Despard. J. B. Gough. Bryant. Lizzie W. Champney. William Ware. Ph ila delph ia Bn Uetin. Frederick Whittuker. Will Carleton. William Mitchell. Theodore Parker. Chronicle, Augusta, 6a. Everett. J. M. Bailey. Detroit Press. Mrs. Virginia L. French. Dickens. Alexander Anderson. J. Ed. Milliken. Longfellow. Rev. Kevoman Halt. n.n. F. TT. Gassavay. Charles F. Adams. L,EE newsileafers, and sent by mail, postpaid, receipt of price. SHEPARD, Publishers, Boston. The Freshest, Brightest, and Best, are the 50 Choice^ Selections in the No.5 Eeading Club and Handy Speaker. Edited by George M. Baker. Price, cloth, 60 cenU; paper, 16 cents. CONTEXTS. Thomas S. Collier. " Manxie Wu^ich." Margaret Vandegrift. T. W. fligginson. IIurper'B Magazine. Char lex Follen Adam*. Earl Marhle. R. U. Stoddard. The Ballad of Ronald Clare . The Scotchman at the Play . The Dead Doll A Charge with Prince Rupert An Irish Wake The IJonest Deacon JTact and Talent The Two Glasses . Whistling in Heaven Koble Revenge Dot Baby off Mine. (By permission) The Amateur Spelling-Match Why Biddy and Pat got Married Art-Matters in Indiana . Miss Edith helps Things along The Flood and the Ark . Not Dead, but Risen Ballad of a Baker . Five ...... Uncle Remus' Revival ITymn A Mysterious Disappearance An Indignation-Meeting. Something Spilt From the Sublime to the Ridiculous " 'tis but a Step " Scene from " The Marble Heart" , The Seven Ages ... A Watch that " wanted cleaning." (By permission) Tired Mothers .... Good-by *' One of the Boys " The Bridge .... A Rhino Legend The Little Shoes did it . Burdock's Goat Faithful Little Peter Blue and Gray Mollie, or Sadie? . Butterwick's Weakness . Between the Lines . Somebody's Mother The Ballad of Constance Failed The Canteen .... A Blessing on the Dance An Exciting Contest The Last Redoubt . " If We Knew "... Scene from " London Assurance " The Kaiser's Feast . Sidewaj-8 Sold by all booksellers and newsdealers, and sent by mail, postpaid, on receipt of price. LEE & SHEPARD, Publishers, Boston. Charles Dickens' Pickwick Papers, Charles Selby. Shakspeare. J. T. Fields. Frank Foxcroft. IT. W. Longfellow. Curtis Guild. William, Winter. a O. Ilalpine {Miles O'lieilly'). Irwin Russell. Alfred Austin. e, 6 The Best Yet. 50 Rare Selections. Reading Club and Handy Speaker. Edited by George M. Baker. Price, cloth, 60 cents ; paper, 16 cents. CONTENTS. ; Count Eberhard's Last Foray Thos. S. Collier. 'J'ammy's Prize Deaf and Dumb Anna F. Bumham. Tlie Changed Cross ■ Virginius to the Roman Army Elijah Kellogg. The Fountain of Youth Uezekiah Buticrvoorth. ' They Met J Clerical Wit \ Greeley's Ride Mark Twain. i Der Shoemaker's Poy ' 'J'he Sergeant of the Fiftieth The Fan Drill Spectator. * Warning to Woman The Cavalry Charge F. A. Ihtrivage. \ Widow Stebbins on Homoeopathy Churle-i F. Adams. j The Fight at L«okout IL L. Can/, Jun. '. The Well-Digger John G. Saxe. \ Behind Time Freeman Hunt. 'i A Miracle Charles U. Webber. 1 Weaving the Web The Great Future George F. Iloar. - A Christmas Carol j "Them Yankee Blankits" Samuel W. Small. j Jim Lane's Last Message Sherman 1). Richardson. \ One Touch of Nature i A Disturbance in Church Max Adeler. \ The Palmer's Vision J. G. JluUand. a A " Sweeter Revenge " j The Farmer's Story David Hill. --j Paddy O'Rafther Samuel Lover. i The Fireman's Prayer Russell If. Contoell. j Down with the' Heathen Chinee! 2i'etv- York Sun. John Chinaman's Protest M. F. I). j The Sweet Singer of Michigan • Ten Years After Kate Pntvam Osgood. \ Putty and Varnish Josh Biltiiigs. ,, Nationality Rufus Chmite. . Tacking Ship off Shore Waltnriucred at Last" Maria L. Fve. i The Ship-Boy's Letter I An Irish Lovc-Letter George M. Baker. j Reserved Power I 'J'alk about Shooting \ The King's Kiss Nora Perry. ; Joe's Bespeak : A Disturbed Parent i Sold by all booksellers and newsdealers, and sent by mail, postpaid, on , receipt of price. ( LEE & SHEPARD, Publishers. Boston. "^ COMPILED BY HIMSELF. Comprising the Fainoiis Amej'ican Readings. In Neat Paper Covers. Price, 15 cts. Each. IICHOLAS NICKLEBY (at the Yorkshire School). THE STORY OF LITTLE DOMBRY. MR. BOB SAWYER'S PARTY. A CHRISTMAS CAROL. DR. MARIGOLD. BOOTS AT THE H jLLY TREE INN. NICHOLAS NIC «~— . •",.-- (. T^_ Geo. M. Baker & Co Al-4b Franklin St. BnsTon. i^ Baker's Humorous Dialogues. Baker's Humorous Olaloftues. Male characters only. 5 Female characters only* i cenU. ssaent Deacidified using the Bookkeeper process. Neutralizing agent: Magnesium Oxide Treatment Date: March 2009 PreservationTechnologies A WORLD LEADER IN COLLECTIONS PRESERVATION 1 1 1 Thomson Park Drive Cranberry Township, PA 16066 (724)779-2111