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How shall 1 greet you, beautiful Spring
Morning, who have come to my doorstep
virgin with the odours of the far fields?

How shall I greet you, long-sought and
long-awaited Solacer, when my soul, which
should leap up at your coming, languishes
in the nostalgia of imperishable shadows?

SONGS OF ADORATION

BY GUSTAV DAVIDSON

AUTHOR OF
"MELMOTH THE WANDERER"

THE MADRIGAL

100 BROADWAY • NEW YORK
MCMXIX

ur. 2J 1319

TITLE PAGE AND DECORATIONS BY I SANDERS, SCULPTOR.

LETTERING BY THEODORE MEHRER. COMPOSITIO-N BY

I MARLIN. COVER AND INTERIOR STOCK SUPPLIED BY

THE JAPAN PAPER COMPANY

TO M M A

Thii Edition printed on
San Marco paper and
limited to joo copies of
•which thii copy is No.

/V.<! /

SONGS OF ADORATION
I -XVIII

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• • • • • • • • • . • • • . • •

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

;,.• ••.::.•• ••.:;.•• ••.::•••••••••,;

SONGS OF ADORATION

LET me sit at the feet of thy goodness,
which thou hast gathered in the years
of thy becoming.

Let me learn only from thy lips the beau-
tiful parable of this world, which thou hast
interpreted according to the manner of thine

evolving.

Out of the chaos of my own soul let me
look steadily to the light of thy spirit.

Lead me, who am lost and loitering, unto
the summits of thy grace, thy blessedness,
and thy tranquility.

SONGS OP ADORATION

EVEN in the dawn of my singing, there
already shineth upon me the sun of
my downgoing.

I mount and look unto the very altitudes;
yet whilst the thin air breatheth about me,
I know how soon will be the immediacy
of my down-climbing.

Thou, singing, look'st only beyond thee to.
wards thy fulfilment. Thou, singing, knowest
only ascent towards thy attainment, and goest
on in thy faith, unafraid.

But I am weak with hesitations, I am full
of misgivings, my faith is constantly assailed.

Yea, darkness descendeth upon me, and I
know not the true road.

SONGS OF ADORATION

III

THOU hast met me in the way of my jour-
neying and hast shown me grace. A
string of amber and carnelian beads, so hang-
eth thy goodness about my neck, so lieth it
upon my breast. I walk, and it shineth. I
move, and it gloweth. I run, and it sheddeth
its lustre all over.

Thy calm floweth unto my very feet, a
river of sweet waters. Its purling soundeth
in mine ears with a sweet sound; it laveth
mine eyes; it cooleth even my noonday thirst-
ing.

Yea, on a day of good-befalling thou earnest
to me: in my most need and in my farthest
lonesomeness. Long didst thou await me on
the shores of my destiny, and ever in thy
hands were the gathered fruits of thy be-
coming, even to overflowing.

Unto the path of my on-going and up-
clirabing didst thou come to deliver me; even
unto the summits of my own fulfilment.

SONGS OF ADORATION

THOU hast touched the heaven and earth
of my soul. Now I am ablaze with
the twin fires of thine enkindling. Now there
dances in me a host of untamable visions
and unforsakable songs.

Yea, like some deep-sea diver didst thou
plunge into my depths. In thy swift and
earliest magnificence, warm with the sum-
mer-heat of life, didst thou burst in upon
me, and like a submerging sun invade my
hidden waters.

Now sorely troubled are the hitherto-still
pools of my spirit, the hitherto slow-flowing
streams of my remoteness. I know not what
maketh me to tremble all over. Only a great
unrest hath taken possession of my heart;
only a sweet sorrow hath hung its jewel,
piece on my breast.

0, thou hast touched the heaven and earth
of my soul, and I am ablaze with the twin
fires of thine enkindling.

/naC I

SONGS OP ADORATION

THOU failest not in remembrance of me.
Thou keepest in mind my constant
need. Thou givest thought to my alone-
being. Thou dost not forsake me.

Thy goodness endureth to the end. Thy
lovingkindness floweth in an unceasing
stream. There is no last to thy fair-bestow-
ing.

0, thou makest me to exult. Thou makest
me to give praises in song. Thou makest
me to utter thy name in many languages, to
sound it on many strings.

For thy sake will I purify my ways and
walk in the paths of my justification. Thou
pointest out the road for my feet to take,
and goest before me. And thou leadest me
back to the days of mine innocence. Yea,
thou makest me to celebrate my renewal.

When I seem to stray, thou arrangest for
me a covenant with my forgotten angels. And
thou strengthenest my purpose. And thou

SONGS OF ADORATION

fortifiest my will. And thou teachest direc-
tion to my soul.

Without thee, what am I? A house with-
out light, a ship that wandereth on the high
waters, a worshipper without faith.

Without thy light what were my dark-
ness? A close-shuttered temple, a night
without stars, a groping that knoweth no end.

0, thou failest not in remembrance of me.
Thou keepest in mind my constant need.
Thou givest thought to my alone-being. Thou
dost not forsake me.

SONGS OF ADORATION

SONG dwelleth not in my heart, and my
lips make no utterance. Like a foun-
tain that playeth no longer, so is my heart
stilled.

My instrument is laid aside, and the strings
have ceased their quivering; they know not
the touch of my hands, nor the communi-
cation of my spirit.

As though turned underground, so runneth
now every prompting to music, even back to
its source. Unheard are all the wontea Har-
monies of my conjuring.

Spring Cometh arrayed and the earth yield-
eth up various scents. The sun spreadeth his
radiance before mine eyes, the trees whisper
about me, the dew falleth upon the ground,
twilight descendeth.

I walk in the paths of my justification and
?n the ways of my on-going. I do not stray
from the right road. I do not linger by the
wayside.

Yet only as a wind striketh the surface of
the waters and maketh it to tremble, leaving
calm all the spaces beneath, even in such
manner am I moved. My heart, deep down,

SONGS OP ADORATION

leapeth not in answer. My lips give forth
po sound.

I know not the interpretation of my own
want, nor the depths of my stillness. My
own sorrow I possess not, nor the joy of its
telling.

The springs of my delight are sealed; the
wells of my utterance. Like a fountain that
playeth no longer, so is my heart stilled.

SONGS OP ADORATION

VII

I WILL seek out a place for myself in the
midst of the city and sit still, with my
hands folded. It will not trouble me to see
the whole world busy with its thousand cares,
for I will not heed it. With my hands folded
I will sit still and meditate upon thee.

Oh, they will come to me and say. How
can you sit there doing nothing? They will
run to me and cry, Do you not see there are
d thousand things to be accomplished ere the
day is done and yet you have not stirred?

To this I will have no answer ready. I
wiU bear patiently their reproaches and make
no reply. Because they may not understand,
why should I grieve them with a single word?
To me it will merely seem that there is no
need for hastening. All my life I have hast-
ened, and what have I accomplished? All my
years 1 have spent in pursuit of the next mo-
ment fleeting — and when have I found it?

No, I will seek out a place for myself in
the midst of the city, and meditate upon thee
with folded hands.

SONGS OF ADORATION

VIII

YOU have given me cause to sing, and
though my heart is without motive, I
will not hesitate to malie songs out of my
own rejoicing.

Because you are the subject of my adora-
tion, it seems to me that the whole world
must put aside its cares and listen to my
singing.

I will take my flute in my hands and play
upon it. And my music will be of the new-
born day which the sun has brought as a
gift to the earth this beautiful, glad morning.
But I will really be thinking of one who has
given me to know the gladness of my own
awakening.

I will sing of the freshness of April fields
and the buoyancy of all things that surround
me. But I will have ever before me the
image of one who has set Spring in my own
heart.

They will hearken, my listeners, and look
to the east and to the west to see the things
whereof my song makes mention; but they
will not know that the thing I have left un-

SONGS OF ADORATION

spoken — it is that which gives such magic
to my flute.

And when I have praised all the visible
sights of the earth, and my listeners have
departed, I shall still be singing.

And when I have extolled the oncoming
stars till they too wane from the heavens,
dawn will find me on the hills with my flute
still in my hands.

For you, who have risen never to wane,
have given me cause for singing, and out
of the joy that is mine through your be-
stowing, I will scatter music into the heart
of all the world.

SONGS OF ADORATION

I WILL set thy name above all others in my
heart, for thou art my salvation.

Therefore will I make songs unto thee
without ceasing, and never weary of extolling
thy goodness all the day long.

I will establish thy worth broadcast, in
the dark and light places of the land, and
cause thy name to be remembered through
many generations.

For I was in distress, and called upon thee
out of my distress, and thou didst answer me.
I appeared before thee empty-handed, and
thou wast not wroth; but thou didst receive
me with willing arms and open countenance.
Even when I came to thy door, thou didst not
turn away. Even when thou sawest my need,
thou didst not forsake me. Rather, thou
took'st me closer to thy bosom and gavest
me full comfort.

Truly thou art my good, and my help, and
my deliverer out of darkness. In thy strength
will I take refuge; in thy sanctuary.

Oh, how will it be with me when thou art
no longer near — when thou standest at a
distance?

SONGS OP ADORATION

In thy presence my heart breatheth in the
sun; and when thou art away from me, my
soul seizeth upon its stars. But when thou
shalt be altogether removed from me, what
shall I do?

Because of thy goodness, song welleth in me
like a river that riseth and overfloweth its
banks; like a water-spill that hurrieth down
the mountainside and becometh a torrent.

Thou art ever with me, by night and by
day. I hear thy footsteps on the cool pavil-
ions of my solitudes; thou companionest me
in my lonesomest hours.

I will set thy name above all others in my
heart, for thou art my salvation.

SONGS OP ADORATION

BECAUSE thou hast brought me the gifts
of thy singing, ray heart breaketh with
pride.

With the jewels of thy Houses of Dreams
thou weightest down my hands, and now I
am crowned.

In the twilight, when I come home from
my tasks, I take thy songs in my hands and
carry them to a chamber of silence. And
there I meditate upon them, full of love and
reverence, because they are the gathered fruits
of thy life, in thy becoming.

But when thou turnest to me and breath-
est upon me thy song, I know it is too great
an honor to be endured, and my heart shat-
ters itself into a thousand fragments at thy
feet.

SONGS OF ADORATION

THERE is weariness in my heart for the
songs I have not sung to you.

Full of the longing to give of my thoughts
in my most perfect words, yet ever am I
cast down because my lips utter only the
merest fragments and the most pitiable im-
perfections. My heart y3arns to give of its
fulness in joy and pain, and I am faint with
useless striving.

Because, in my impatience, I cannot con-
vey to you at once all the music that is in
my soul, I am seized with conflicting tor-
ments. I know you are unmoved by my sing-
ing — therefore I cannot endure my own crea-
tions.

When the day is done and I wend my
way home from my tasks, I love to think
that you are there, at the end of the road,
awaiting me; that your heart, free and at-

27-

SONGS OF ADOnATION

tuned, is a-tremble with expectation of my
singing.

I love to think that each day, as I come
to you, I bear in my own heart a song in
its uttermost perfection.

But my dreams are as bubbles on the
bursting foam, and more than ever do my
unsatisfied longings weigh down upon me like
the spread wings of gaunt and terrible birds.

Oh, I shall become so bitter with myself
at last that I shall create, out of my deepest
anguish, the most beautiful song of all; and
then you, who have hitherto stood inaccessible
of my singing, will crown me with your tears.

SONGS OP ADORATION

XII

YOU who have taught me reverence and
pointed the way to my pride — v

As when you said, because I strove so
hard: ''You need not sing — I know, I under-
stand." And caused my songs to overflow the
more.

As when you wrote: "Who in my hour
of need brought me your own young thirst-
ing soul to feed." And set the torches flaming
in my heart.

And once you took my hand within your
palms, smoothing it gently.

And once you placed your own white, pray,
erful fingers on my head —

You who have taught me reverence and
pointed the way to my pride.

SONGS OF ADORATION

XIII

WHEN the gold of my life is scattered
in the dust and the hope of the
world is no more with me, then like a little
child with outstretched hands will I run to
you, craving the tenderness which will right-
fully be mine. For I will be as a little child
wanting its mother.

I will come to you, knowing nothing. And
you will take me on your knees and fold me
lovingly in your arms. With tales out of
fairyland you will soothe my mind, and with
old remembered tunes, sing me to sleep.

At times my eyes will grow eloquent with
visions that your words will unfold for me;
at times my heart will grow wistful in the
recollections of far-away years. And when,
after a while, my mind will have drifted
away in the tide of your own imaginings, I
will cease to listen and my eyes will be
closed.

You will give me back the gold of my
life and open up again the door of my dreams.

SONGS OF ADORATION

You will honor and crown me anew as I
stand disinherited before you.

When the grey of the world has touched
the colors of my soul, and I am utterly with-
out longing, I will run to you with out-
stretched hands, like a little child, calling
its mother.

SONGS OF ADORATION

XIV

OH, what has been prepared for my
heart which knoweth not whether to
sorrow or to rejoice? Which is weighted
down with many presentiments and feeleth
the hold of an unmentionable fear upon it?

Oh, let it be given my heart to have cause
to rejoice. Let it be given my heart to fold
itself again in the love of many things, to be
exuberant with courage and thanksgiving to.
wards the whole world.

Oh, there is something already unalterably
written in the heavens, and the pulses of my
heart are slow-moving, like the drag of pon-
derous chains.

What has been prepared for my heart which
knowelh not whether to sorrow or to rejoice?

SONGS OF ADORATION

IN THE da3's of my promise, woman, the
grace of your favor lay with sweet weight
upon my soul.

Then, when I sang, though my song was
imperfect and faltering, you listened with
pride to my singing, and your heart trembled,
as with a deep expectation.

Now, in my fulfihnent, you have forsaken
me.

Now, when I sing, and the melodies flow
unhindered from my soul, and utter forth
the whole of my longings perfect as song
can convey them, you turn away and are si-
lent. I lay the full fruits of my efforts hum-
bly within your lap and you accept them
not!

Oh, have I made friends of all the world
with my singing that you should forsake me?

In the days of my promise the grace of
your favor lay with sweet weight upon my
soul.

Now, in my fulfilment, you have forsaken
me.

SONGS OF ADORATION

XVI

JUBILANT were my feet in the days of my
adoration.
Then, ere ever thou hadst uttered the word,
I knew that thy summons had sounded.

Thy heart need only have called — I heard,
and with pace undiminishing sped to thy side.
Jubilant were my feet in the days of my
adoration

But now, when thou sayest "Come!" my
heart pondereth the enigmatic word. Fain
are my feet to fly, yet irresolute I stand, de-
bating thy true intent.

Once I could know ere thou hadst uttered
the word.

Now, when thou sayest "Come!" my heart,
misgiving, knoweth not which way to turn.

SONGS OF ADORATION

XVII

THE temple is dark on the hillside and the
snows have descended the mountains.

I stand in the midst of my wayfaring and
know not whither the road leads.

The temple is dark on the hillside and
night is adrift in the valleys.

Indistinct is the land that surrounds me,
and I hear not the call of thy summons.

The torrents surge white in my pathway,
and I hear not the sound of thy footsteps.

Only the murmur of voices in the pulse
of remembered springtides.

Only the winds blowing chill on the years
that have waded between us.

I stand in the midst of my wayfaring and
know not whither the road leads.

The temple is dark on the hillside and night
is adrift in the valleys.

SONGS OP ADORATION

XVIII

THE vesper lamps are lit, and thou hast
entered the temple.

Before the altar thou kneelest, and thy

heart is solemn with offerings.

Before the altar, in prayer, attending the

sound of my footsteps.

Worshipful I come, as of old, though long
on the highway I tarried.

The road was steep, and the rapids surged
ever more darkling before me.

Worshipful, as of old, with wreaths to
encircle thy forehead!

Through open meadow and upland, through
perilous wild-glen and forest,

I come remembering the law in the days
of our hearts' intercession:

Remembering the songs that were wrought

SONGS OP ADORATION

when Spring still moved through the down-
lands!

The vesper lamps are lit, and thou hast
entered the temple.

I come, though the dusk is fallen, and the
years are adrift in my spirit!

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