635 )28 ►y 1 NO PLAYS EXCHANGED. iAHnR';5 Edition or Pl7\y3 A Suffragette Town Meeting Price, 26 Cents \w Salter ntBTXHER 5?cq. '^|L_J B03T0IS Qy^^i^^i COPYRIGHT, 1889. BY WALTER H. BAKER & CO. B. U)* Pinero's Plays PrkCt 50 Cents €acb TUP A M A 7nNQ Farce in Three Acts. Seven males, five fe- iril!< Jn.VHI\£ji\J ViiJ iMules. Costumes, modern; scenery, not difficult. Plays a full evening. THE CABINET MINISTER ma'les, "nine^"emafes! Co" tvunes, modern society; scenery, three interiors. Plays a full evening- riAWnV niflT Farce in Three Acts. Seven males, four fe- UAnUl LriV/Iv males. Costumes, modern; scenery, two inte- riors. Plays two hours and a half. Ttir r'AV I ADH niirY comedy in Four Acts. Fourmales, itlEi UAI LVIVU V£UEiA ten females. Costumes, modern; scenery, two interiors and an exterior. Plays a full evening. OfC UATTCr IM nOnUD comedy in Four Acts. Nine males, nliJ nUUijL ill UIXUEIV tour females. Costumes, modern; scenery, three interiors. Plays a full evening. TUC UnDDV UriDCr comedy in Three Acts. Ten males, inL nXJDDl nUIVOt nve females. Costumes, modern; scenery easy. Plays two hours and a half. TDIQ Drama in Five Acts. Seven males, seven femal'^s. Costumes, livid modern ; scenery, three interiors. Plays a full evening. I 4|\V DfllTlMTflJITI Play in Four Acts. Eight males, seven LAUI DUUillirULi females. Costumes, modern; scen- ery, four interiors, not easy. Plays a full evening. . I I7TTV Drama in Four Acts and an Epilogue. Ten males, flVe LCil I I females. Costumes, modern; scenery complicated. Plays a full evening. TUU MAPICTDATU Farce in Three Acts. Twelve males, ItlEi IvIAUlO llV/\ 1 H four females. Costumes, modern; scenery, all interior. Plays two hours and a half. Sent prepaid on receipt of price by Walttv H. pafeer & Companp No. 5 Hamilton Place, Boston, Massachusetts A Suffragette Town Meeting An Entertainment in One Act By LILIAN CLISBY BRIDGHAM Author of ^^The Famous Brown vs. Brown Separate Maintenance Case " e i» « BOSTON WALTER H. BAKER & CO. 1912 A Suffragette Town Meeting CHARACTERS Mrs. Manchester, Moderator, Mrs. Briggs, Town Clerk. Mrs. Smart, Tax Collector, Mrs. Gray, Chief Constable, Mrs. Eaton, Fence Viewer. Mrs. Cash, Tree Warden. Mrs. Jones, Superintendent of Streets, Mrs. White, Overseer of the Poor. Mrs. Prouty, Chairman Board of Assessors, Mrs. Snow, Milk Inspector. Mrs. Drake, Highway Surveyor. Mrs. Holmes, Auditor. Mrs. Plain, Chairman Board of Health. Mrs. Blunt, 7^w« Treasurer. Mrs. Gate, Chairman Board of Selectmen, Mrs. Sears, Chairman School Committee, Bridget. Maggie. Nora. Mr. Manchester. Plays one hour. Copyright, 191 2, by Walter H. Baker & Co. / ©Ci.D 31691 A Suffragette Town Meeting SCENE. — Ordinary hall with door right and Uft of rear of stage ; desk in centre of rear for moderator ^ smaller desk in front of that for clerk. Settees at right and left of stage facing centre. Use local names and places where blanks are left. Enter Mrs. Smart, Mrs. Gray and Mrs. Eaton. Mrs. Smart. What do you think I have decided to do ? Mrs. G. Give it up. Do tell. Mrs. E. Yes, do. I'm just dying for some really new news. This town has been as dead as last year's calendar lately. Mrs. Smart. Well — I am going to be moderator of this town meeting ! Mrs: E." } (.disappointed). Oh ! Mrs. Smart. I knew you'd be surprised ; but I just made up my mind in bed last night. You see I was president of the {local ) Basket Ball team, and am well posted on running public affairs, so while personally I might prefer to be a silent on- looker, duty forces me to be willing to become a leader of my people — for the sake of our beloved town — and — of course you must vote for me. I'm going to give the lovehest party next week for all who are on my side. Mrs. G. Why, I suppose we might as well then. Mrs. Smart. Won't you, Mrs. Eaton ? Mrs. E. (hesitating). Well, I — er — er Mrs. Smart. Do you know, dear, I thought to-day when riding by your place that perhaps you would like some nice long rides in our new touring car ? Um — you will vote for me, won't you ? Mrs. E. Oh, I always stand by my friends ! Mrs. G. (aside). Wasn't I a donkey not to hold out longer ? (The three talk together in whispers.') 4 A SUFFRAGETTE TOWN MEETING Enter Mrs. Cash, Mrs. Jones and Mrs. White. Mrs. Cash. I guess I have got a surprise for you this time all right. You can never imagine what I'm going to do. ^^^•|- I What is it? Mrs. W. ) Mrs. Cash. I'm going to be moderator of this meeting and you two can be my Oh, what is it the men call them ? Mrs. J. Well, I rather guess we women have brains enough to think up a name for ourselves. Mrs. Cash. We will say aides. You two be my aides and buttonhole the ladies and get them to vote for me. Mrs. J. And in return ? Mrs. Cash. Oh, yes — let me think. — I'll have you both at my summer cottage in Beverly for two weeks next summer. Mrs. W. Oh, that would be delightful — let us plan our gowns now. Enter Mrs. Prouty, Mrs. Snovit and Mrs. Drake. Mrs. Prou. Oh, ladies, I am just dying to tell you some- thing. Do you know I tried and tried to think of some woman who could run this town meeting — and finally decided I'd simply have to do it myself, so if you will kindly nominate me I am sure all the ladies will be delighted to vote for me. Mrs. D. Why — I kinder thought I'd run for that job my- self. Mrs. Prou. You ? A stay-at-home- mind-the-baby sort of woman like you moderator of a town meeting ! You wouldn't know how to call a meeting to order. My husband was chair- man of the Board of Health for seven years and in the summer time they met in our barn and I listened to the proceedings. Every other minute it would be something like this : ** See here, Tom Jones, if you don't shut up this everlasting chewing of the rag I'll pitch you out of that window heels over head before you can say Jack Robinson." Oh, I'm the one for that job all right. Mrs. Snow. Well, but what is there in it for us ? Mrs. D. Yes, where do we come in ? Mrs. Prou. Why — let me see. — Oh, I'll tell you. — Mrs. Snow, you nominate me for moderator, and I'll appoint you tellers to count the votes, then you can fix them just as you like. (The three whisper together.) A SUFFRAGETTE TOWN MEETING 5 Enter Mrs. Holmes, Mrs. Plain and Mrs. Blunt. Mrs. H. I called for Mrs. Manchester, but she had com- pany, so I didn't wait. There was an auto at her door. Mrs. Blunt. An automobile at the Manchesters' — well, it must have been the doctor, for nobody else who is anybody calls on that faded out Mrs. Manchester. Mrs. D. That's true all right. Do you know she lets her children associate with that drunken Taylor family on {local^ street. Mrs. Plain. Well, they are real nice little children, and it is not their fault that their father drinks. I don't see but Mrs. Manchester is just as good as some other people, and they do say her husband's uncle is a Duke. She never speaks of it though. Mrs. Prou. They do say indeed ! Well, you may be sure that's all it amounts to — imagine that ordinary little woman who lives in a hired house related to a Duke — ridiculous ! Mrs. H. (Jo Mrs. Plain). Well, I hope to goodness they will have a short meeting, for I've got to get home early to get Charles' supper. Mrs. Plain. Well, my husband has his supper when I'm ready to give it to him ; but do stay until the moderator is elected, for I am going to run for that job and want your vote. Will you nominate me ? Mrs. H. Oh, I'll nominate you all right, but you must enjoy hornets' nests to want to run this shooting match. Mrs. Plain. Who is it runs a town meeting before the moderator is elected anyhow ? Mrs. Blunt. Why, the town clerk, of course. — I'll bet she is late. She always is, wherever she goes, and / think it's just because she wants everybody to stare at her. Ssh ! Here she comes now. Enter Mrs. Briggs, Mrs. Gate and Mrs. Sears. Mrs. Gate. I don't care if I am chairman of the Board of Selectmen, I can be elected moderator too, can't I? Mrs. Sears. You ought to be satisfied with what you have got now and not try to be the whole push. Now I had this new gown made expressly to wear here to-night, and I'm just going to run for moderator, and if you'll nominate me I'll (aside to Mrs. Gate) give you that pair of colonial candle- sticks you admire so much. 6 A SUFFRAGETTE TOWN MEETING Mrs. Gate. Well, I should smile — I'll nominate you all right. Mrs. Briggs. Well, I was thinking of nominating Mrs. Manchester if she came. / think she is really quite a brainy little woman. Mrs. Sears. Oh, dear me! What shall I do? Oh, I'll get John to give your husband the job of repainting our house. Mrs. Briggs. All right, I'm with you. Enter Maggie, Bridget and Nora. Mrs. Cash. For the land sake there's my Bridget ! Mrs. Smart. And if there isn't my Nora ! Mrs. D. And my Maggie. Did you ever see such nerve ? (Ladies spread skirts occupying fjiore space.) Mrs. Cash. It is too bad, but really there isn't a bit of room for you. Mrs. Plain. If I had my way^ only women of real estate would be allowed to vote. Mag. Sure and was that the rason you made your husband put your ;^2oo down-ten-doUars-a-month-house in your name ? Come on, girls, here's room. {They squeeze into front seat. Mrs. Plain takes back seat.) Mrs. H. Well, girls, I am glad you are interested enough in the government of our town to come out to-night, but I'm very glad my Molly didn't want to come, for my husband would go wild if there was no one at home to wait upon him. Brid. Faith, it wasn't interest in the givunmint, but we wanted to see who stharted the first row. Mrs. E. It does look as though the men were to let us run this meeting alone after all. I was scared blue for fear some would come, as it was the first one since women were elected town officers. I told my husband if he dared to come I would leave him on the spot. That settled him. Mrs. G. I told mine that the price of his coming would be two new gowns, and he concluded it would be too expensive. Mrs. Cash. Well, I told mine I wouldn't cook baked beans, boiled dinner, or doughnuts again for six months if he came, and that fixed him all right, Mrs. Snow. I just told Ed I should invite mama to come and live with us if he came, and you should have seen his face. A SUFFRAGETTE TOWN MEETING 7 Mrs. Smart. Well, Mr. Smart said he wouldn't miss the show, as he called it, for a good deal, and I had pretty hard work thinking up something that would be sure to keep him away. All. What was it ? Mrs. Smart. Well, he thought my last parlor maid was pretty nice and I discharged her. Now, she was extremely fond of the color and odor of violets, so I got some violet paper and perfumed it pretty high and wrote him a letter. ''My dear Mr. Smart: — I am in dreadful, dreadful trouble and in great need of your wise advice. Will you meet me by the restaurant door of the South Station (insert the present date) evening at 8 : 45, please ? I will not detain you long. Beatrice." I guess he is waiting there now. Ha, ha, ha ! Mrs. Prou. That was clever all right \ but my husband didn't want to come. He said Oh, I guess I won't say what. All. Oh, please do. Mrs. Prou. No, I can't. Really, I shouldn't have re- ferred to it. All. But you must tell us. Mrs. Prou. Well, if you will have it, he said it was all he could do to stand the cackling of one hen, let alone a whole flock. All. Oh, how dreadful ! The villain ! Mrs. Prou. Well, you just made me tell. What did you do to keep your husband at home, Mrs. Blunt ? He told John he was coming, live or die. Mrs. Blunt. Oh, I just simply told him not to come. That was enough. Mrs. Gate. Well, my husband didn't say anything hate- ful, but he had an important engagement, otherwise he wouldn't have missed it for anything. Mrs. Plain. Mrs. Sears, "i r,., ,, .1 u *. u Mrs. J. Mrs. W. \ ^^^^ ?7<='ly '^hat my hus- Mrs. H. Mrs. Briggs. \ ^^""^ '^"^- Enter Mrs. Manchester. Mrs. M. How do you do, ladies ? I have the most won- derful thing to tell you. (All talk and ignore her.) Mrs. Blunt. What is it, dear Mrs. Manchester ? 8 A SUFFRAGETTE TOWN MEETING Mrs. M. It is simply too wonderful — too surprising. Mrs. Smart | (^aside). I do believe she is going to run Mrs. Cash V ^^^ moderator. The very idea ! Mrs. Prou. ) ^ Mrs. M. (Jo Mrs. Blunt). You know, Mr. Manchester is only nephew of the Duke of Waterbury. All (sitiing up and gasping). Yes? Mrs. Blunt. Oh, you are all interested now. Go on, my dear. Mrs. M. Well, His Grace had two lovely sons, eighteen and twenty years old, so of course we never dreamed that there was the least chance of succession for Albert. All. Well ! Mrs. M. Well, we got a message Monday that the two boys were both drowned, and the shock killed their father. Oh (crying), that poor, poor mother ! All. And now ? Mrs. M. Why, Albert is Duke of Waterbury. But how I do pity that afflicted woman. All. Oh ! Your Grace ! Mrs. M. You needn't "Your Grace" me. I am still Emma Manchester to all ray friends, and^ — I fear you won't believe me — but I would be just too happy for anything if only that poor woman could have her loved ones back again — it is so terrible. Mrs. Smart. My dearest — er — Your Grace, I meant — I was going to tell you before — but I give a garden party next week Friday, and you must be sure and come Mrs. M. But we shall be in mourning ! Mrs. Smart. Oh ! but I will make it very quiet and digni- fied, and I will send my limousine for you and Mr. — er — His Grace at eight. Now promise me you will come. Mrs. M. Very well, thank you most kindly. Mrs. Smart. Oh, the pleasure is all mine, and I'll be sure and send the limousine. Mrs. Cash. And, dearest, I want you to spend the whole month of July down at our summer place. — You promised Mrs. Smart, so you won't refuse me, will you? Mrs. M. If you put it on that ground I can't very well. But why are you all so kind to me ? Mrs. Prou. And we take a trip for two weeks along the coast of Maine in our new steam yacht in August, and there will be just room for your family. A SUFFRAGETTE TOWN MEETING 9 Mrs. M. Really, my dear, we go abroad in the fall, for good. My husband will probably go before, and I must spend some time in getting ready. Mrs. Prou. Well, but I shall steal you for our August trip. Mrs. Briggs {rapping for order). The meeting will please come to order. The first business is the election of a mod- erator by ballot. Will some one please nominate ? Mag. I nominate Bridget. Mrs. G. "I TMrs. Smart. Mrs. T. t • .- Mrs. Cash. Mrs. Snow. \ ^ "^^^"^^^ 1 Mrs. Prouty. Mrs. Plain. J l^ Myself Mrs. Briggs. You have heard the nominations. You will prepare your ballots. Slips will be handed you. I appoint Mrs. Sears and Mrs. Gate as tellers to receive and count the ballots. {Each candidate tries to get friends to vote for her,) Mrs. G. I have no pencil. Mrs. Briggs. Well, I have a fountain pen, but it will take forever for all of you to use it. Mrs. Smart. I have several of my visiting cards you may each have for your ballots. Mrs. Gate. Thanks awfully, but I guess each lady can prepare her own. ( While they are marking out ballots Brid. takes Mrs. Gate's coat from back of her chair and tries it on, Mrs. Gate catches her.) Oh, you vile upstart you ! Take off that coat this instant ! It's lucky for you that you don't work for me. I'd dock your pay two weeks for that. Brid. Yer couldn't do it. I belong to the Work-ladies' Union. {Makes faces at her,) Mrs. Briggs. Have all voted who wish ? If so Nora. Please, mum, I can't write Mrs. W. There, now, listen to that. A woman who can't write trying to vote at a town meeting. Nora. Aw, yez didn't let me finish. I can't write with nothing to write with. (Mrs. Gate hands her pen to her.) Biddy, how does ye spell yer last name? Brid. R-i-1-e-y. Shure how would ye spell it ? (Mrs. Sears and Mrs. Gate collect votes and carry them to a high desk to sort them out.) 10 A SUFFRAGETTE TOWN MEETING Mrs. E. Doesn't it make you tired the airs Mrs. Gate puts on, just because she is chairman of the Board of Selectmen ? And there's Mrs. Manchester, a duchess, and not a single bit of airs does she sport. I don't think I'll vote for Mrs. Gate again. Mrs. W. What do you imagine possessed those servant girls to come here ? Mrs. Smart. I'm sure I don't know. Goodness knows what the world is coming to if kitchen girls try to run our town affairs. Mrs. Gate. Madam Glerk, we are ready to report. Mrs. Briggs. Very well. Attention, ladies, to the report of the tellers. Mrs. Gate. Number of votes cast, nineteen ; necessary for a choice, ten. Mrs. Smart has one vote. (Mrs. Smart nearly collapses.) Mrs. Prouty has one vote. (Mrs. Prou. scolds those about her.) Mrs. Gash has one vote. (Mrs. Gash very indignant.) Mrs. Plain has two votes. One is in Mrs. Man- chester's writing. Miss Bridget Riley has three votes. (Nora cries t ** Hooray f) Mrs. Manchester has eleven votes, and is elected. Mrs. Briggs. I declare Mrs. Manchester, the Duchess of Waterbury, elected moderator of this meeting. Brid. Well, begorra, I came out second. What do yez know about that ? Mrs. Briggs. The ladies present will preserve order. Mrs. M. But — er — why — er — why, ladies, this is a great surprise, and I feel wholly unfitted for the honors you bestow on me. Brid. (rising). Very well, mum. It's me for the job, then, for I'm next. Hand over that hammer, Mrs. Glerk. Mrs. J. {pulling her back). Will you sit down and be quiet ? Mrs. Briggs. My dear Mrs. Manchester, we are only too proud to be presided over by so gracious a lady. Allow me to escort you to your throne. {All but the other candidates applaud.) Mrs. M. You are very kind, and since you insist, I'll do my best, but you must be patient if I make mistakes or dis- please you in any way. (Mrs. Briggs escorts her to seat.) A SUFFRAGETTE TOWN MEETING II Mrs. Plain. That's all right, my dear. You have a good level head, and I'm sure you will get along all right. Mrs. Sears. Yes, your ladyship, we are most delighted to have a woman of your natural keenness of perception to lead us. Mrs. D. And we feel sure that your sense of justice will permit all questions in dispute to be settled most amicably. Mrs. G. And your infinite tact, Your Grace Mrs. M. Pardon me, ladies, but we must give our closest attention to the business of the meeting. Let us give the affairs and finances of our town the same careful consideration that we would give our homes and pocketbooks. The clerk will now read the warrant which has brought us here, and will give us in detail the matters to be considered. Mrs. Briggs {reading). " Commonwealth of Massachusetts. {Insert name | of county.') \ To either of the Constables of the town of in the county aforesaid, Greeting : In the name of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, you are hereby required and directed to notify and warn the inhabitants of the town of {local), aforesaid, who are qualified to vote at elections and in town affairs therein, to meet in town meeting at the Town Hall in said {local) on the day of A. D., 19..., at eight o'clock, p. m., then and there to act upon the following subjects and business, viz : Article i . To choose a moderator to preside at said meeting. Article 2. To listen to the reading of the records of the last meeting. Article 3. To listen to the reports of officers and commit- tees elected at the last annual meeting, and special meetings. Article 4. To proceed to the election of officers for the en- suing year. Article 5. To appropriate money for town expenses for the ensuing year. Article 6. To act upon any other matter that may legally come before the meeting. And you are hereby commanded to serve this warrant by posting up at least six attested copies thereof in public places in said town, not less than seven days before the day appointed for said meeting, and by leaving a printed copy thereof at every 12 A SUFFRAGETTE TOWN MEETING occupied dwelling house and tenement in said town at least three days before the day appointed for said meeting. Hereof fail not and make due return of this warrant with your doings thereon to the town clerk. Given under our hands at this day of A. D., 19... i^Local names.) {Local names!) {Local names.) Selectmen of the town of A true copy. Attest : {Local.) {Local name,) Constable of the town of {Local.) " Mrs. M. We will now take up the second article of the warrant. The clerk will read the record of the last annual meeting and the special meetings. (Mrs. Briggs s lands up with a very long paper in her hands.) Mrs. Smart. Goodness me ! if it is that long I move that we dispense with the reading of it, and that it be accepted, and that we pass on to the next solo on the program. Mrs. Cash. I second that motion. Mrs. M. It is moved and seconded that we dispense with the reading of the records, and approve them unread. Is there anything to be said on the subject ? Mrs. G. How do we know that she has everything, if she don't read it? Mrs. J. Well, judging by the length of her report, she has everything and a little more. Mrs. W. Question ! Mrs. M. Those in favor of the records being accepted un- read will signify it by the uplifted hand. {All vote '^ yes.'') Those opposed. It is a unanimous vote, and the records are approved unread. Mrs. Briggs. Well, I don't just fancy that seeing that I spent a dozen evenings working it up, and could have spent the time in much pleasanter ways. Mrs. H. Well, you know you would have to have it ready to place upon your town clerk's book, anyway. Mrs. Briggs {slappiiig paper on the desk). Oh, any old thing would do for that. Mrs. M. Never mind, dear. We are sure it is a very cor- rect and interesting record, and we shall be proud to have it placed upon the books. (Mrs. M. may declare recess here, A SUFFRAGETTE TOWN MEETING 1 3 during which refreshments may be sold.') Next come the re- ports of town officers for the past year. First 1 will call on our beloved town clerk, Mrs. Briggs. Mrs. Briggs (^jumping up quickly and reading). *' Report of the town clerk of the town of , for the year ending A. D., 19... The number of marriage licenses issued by the clerk during the year, thirty- six and one-half." Mag. Sure and phwat's the one-half for? (Mrs. Briggs looks Mag. over very superciliously.) Mrs. M. Yes, do jtell us about that one-half, Mrs. Briggs. Mrs. Briggs. Well, Mary Stone came and got hers, but Bob White, whom she was to marry, found out that she was fourteen years older than she claimed, so didn't get his, but left the country. Maggie, I hope your curiosity is gratified. (^Continues.) ''Nineteen male children, twenty-one female children, and one pair of twins, one of each were born. Thirty-seven dogs were licensed, and twenty-seven people died " Mrs. Blunt. I should think she would put deaths before dog licenses. That woman doesn't have any sense of the eter- nal fitness of things. Mrs. Briggs {continuitig). *' Thirty people were placed on the jury list; twelve men and eighteen women. {^Cheers.) Four subordinate town meetings were held, and I did every- thing else a town clerk should do in the interests of her beloved town. Respectfully submitted, Mary L. Briggs, Town Clerk." Nora. Shure and don't they be after doing anything in this town but just be born, married, license their dogs and die ? Brid. Hush, Nora, dear, there's lots more folks got to toot their horns. Mrs. M. You have heard the report of our esteemed town clerk. What is your pleasure to do with it? Brid. I move and second that it be filed. I call it pretty dull. Nora. I third it. Mrs. E. There ought to be some way to quiet those per- sons. Mrs. M. It is moved that we accept the report and place it on file. Those in favor raise their hands. {All do so.) Those opposed ? It is a vote. We will now hear the report of the town treasurer. |. A SUFFRAGETTE TOWN MEETING Mrs. Blunt. " Balance on hand at begin- ning of the year, $ .18 Received from taxes and as- sessments, 202,739.48 Received from licenses, po- lice department, etc., etc., 4,821. 10 207,560.58 Paid out : support of schools, care of highways, support of poor, fire, health and police departments, etc., etc., etc., ^202,760.42 Expense of run- ning theoffice, 4,800.16 ;^2o7,76o.i6 Making the books come out exactly even. Respectfully sub- mitted, Ellen M. Blunt, Treasurer." Mrs. Briggs. Well, no vi^onder they have a new automo- bile. Nearly ^5,000 for expenses of running the treasurer's office. I move you. Madam Moderator, that this report be in- vestigated. Brid. Shure ! show the grafter up. Mrs. Blunt. Oh, you needn't bother; the auditor has al- ready done so, and finds it all right. {To Brid.) So now, smarty. Mrs. Prou. Ah ! I see a light. Mr. Blunt is in the iron fence business, and Mrs. Blunt's dear friend, Mrs. Auditor, has an expensive iron fence about her home — um — hum. Mrs. Sears. Well, it does look rather grafty, doesn't it? Mrs. Blunt. Now just see here, you fuss budgets — my husband is the largest taxpayer in this here town, and if you don't accept this report — we move bag and baggage, and will sell our place to a family of Italians with sixteen children — so there ! Mrs. Sears. Oh, well, I move to accept the outrageous report. Mrs. W. I second it. Mrs. M. I think I had better not put that motion, for fear some one might vote against it, so you {to Mrs. Briggs) may just say it was read and accepted. Mrs. J. Put it that it was accepted for just what it was worth, while you are about it. Madam Clerk. A SUFFRAGETTE TOWN MEETING I5 Mrs. M. Now we will hear the report of the chairman of the Board of Selectmen. Mrs, H. Don't you think we should say '* select- women " ? Mrs. M. Just as you say — so long as we get the re- port. Mrs. Gate. Well, I was too busy to write it out, but we have done every blessed thing we were asked to do but paint the town hall yellow to match Mrs. Skinner's house next door. (Sifs dowttt then bobs up.) Respectfully submitted, Anna Gate. (^Asidg.) Hurry up and move to accept it. Mrs. J. I move we accept it with thanks. Mrs. Briggs. But it should be in writing. Mrs. Gate. Well, aren't you smart enough to write that? Mrs. M. Well, I'm sure our chairman of selectmen has done good work, so of course we will accept her report. Now will the collector of taxes give her report? Mrs. Smart. I've got my report all written out. It isn't very long, but I'm going to read it, every word of it, or else know the reason why — so there ! " Due on past taxes and un- collected by the male tax collectors during the past five years, ;^5, 1 1 7. 59." And I'll say here that our largest taxpayer {look- ing at Mrs. Blunt) owed ;^ 1,900 of that, but he doesn't now. "To paid out for advertising for sale all of this property upon which taxes were due, $$2. The first week the * ad ' ran there was paid ;^ 1,0 10 " second " " " ** '' >' '' 1,200 " third " " *' " " " '< 2,700 ;^4,9io leaving due on past five years' taxes, ;^207.59." And all I can say is it is a blessed good thing for the town, seeing it costs so much to run the treasurer's office. *' GoUected taxes for the present year, ;^i 10,219. Taxes and assessments still due, ^11,876." But they won't be due long, for I am going to have another seance with (name some local paper) this week, and a few ** ads" will soon bring the balance in. I will say this, though — I don't have much trouble with the men, but I do be- lieve the women had rather pay out money for anything else on earth than taxes, and that's all. << Ellen Blunt." Mrs. M. You have heard the report of our collector of taxes ; what will you do with it ? Mrs. Gash. Well, if you will exclude the parentheses, I'll move to accept it. My husband says the one great good that has come to this town under woman's control is the work Mrs. l6 A SUFFRAGETTE TOWN MEETING Blunt has done, and she has no new iron fence about her lawn either. Mrs. M. Those in favor of accepting this report please raise your hands. It is a vote. The school committee will now give its report. Mrs. Sears. " Well, I've had a horrid time. I collected the very prettiest teachers I could find for our schools, and out of nine six have already become engaged, and I guess the oth- ers will soon follow suit. I shall advise my successor to hire freaks. Then Miss {iiame sovie local teacher) was complained of for having pets; she just let the {local) children do about as they wanted to, and mothers of the other children kicked high because Miss {local) 's young man called on her at school much too often. Miss {local) wore such pretty clothes the children couldn't keep their eyes off of her long enough to study their lessons. Miss {local) had no discipline. Miss {local) made the girls sit on one side of the room and the boys on the other, and that made trouble all right — and, oh, dear ! it was nothing but complaints from morning to night, and but for the fear of my husband's * I told you so,' I should have resigned long ago. I certainly wouldn't take the job another year for ten times the salary. Yours truly, Sally Sears." Mrs. M. Poor thing, you certainly have had a hard time, and deserve a good rest. We will accept your report all right. Now we will hear from the chairman of the Board of Health. Mrs.Tlain. Madam Moderator and townswomen. When I was elected to this responsible position I determined to make good or die in the attempt — and — well, I am not dead yet, you see. {Reads.) " It was evidently the impression of my towns- people that my efforts were to be directed toward {name the lozvest section of the town), but a public officer can be no dis- criminator of persons or caste, so the first one I talked to was {na7ne some leading citizen). He has a beautiful home, you all know, but when 1 learned that he had five cats I was convinced that something should be done. Not only are five cats a pub- lic nuisance because of the evening recitals, but we all know how they drag bones about, leaving them to breed disease. Well, I had a hard fight with him and was obliged to make twenty-seven calls upon him before I was successful. Now he has one inoffensive old tabby cat, and the neighborhood is quiet and healthful once more. Next I learned that our chief of police keeps in his home money, valuables and keepsakes, that are put into his care by men sentenced to imprisonment for A SUFFRAGETTE TOWN MEETING 1 7 wilful wrong-doing. Think, fellow citizens, of the millions of microbes in that home spreading disease germs broadcast and liable to result in an epidemic of smallpox or something equally disastrous. It took seventeen calls to persuade him to transfer them to a vault in the basement of the police station. I wanted him to burn them, but finally had to compromise. Next I learned that our street signs were never cleaned, but stood year after year catching all the deadly germs that blew upon them, and the faintest breeze could blow them into the faces of passers-by. I organized a gang of workmen from the street department, and had every one washed in an antiseptic solu- tion, and well rinsed and dried. Now they stand monuments of health and strength." Mrs. W. Not unless you have them dusted three times a day. Mrs. Plain (not heeding her). " That was but the begin- ning. It would take too long to tell of all my labors, but I have been town cleaning, and although abuse has been poured upon me time and again, I have the supreme satisfaction of knowing that through my tireless efforts, we now live in a ver- itable spotless town. Respectfully submitted, Eliza Plain, Chairman Board of Health." Mrs. Smart. She actually made my kitchen girl throw away a lot of good dish cloths. Brid. Shure, didn't she come nosing into our back yard, telling me to pick up this and fumigate that? The big nuisance ! Nora. Yes, and she came to our house and made me wash our attic walls inside. Mag. Well, she did worse than that to me. She ordered me to wash out the coal bin. I up and towld her that if she objected to the looks she could wash it herself, as I had other fish to fry. And then she had the sauce to tell me that fish should be boiled and not fried, as pork was unfit to eat, and she never allowed it in her house. Brid. Shure and her husband looks it — skinny. Mrs. Briggs. Order in the room. Well, I'll file the report, but I hope she fumigated it first. Mrs. M. We will now hear the report of the Board of Assessors. Well, did you have a picnic too, Mrs. Prouty ? Mrs. Prou. Well, I should say I did. {Reads.) " When I began my labors I little knew what I had run up against, and it was only by putting forth herculanian efforts that I was able, l8 A SUFFRAGETTE TOWN MEETING to Straighten things out. I found that every blessed relation and friend of our former assessor had his property assessed for just one-third of its valuation. Mr. {local) 's fine estate was assessed for ^2,000; Mr. {local) 's for ^1,500; Mr. {local) 's for ^3,000, and Mrs. {local) 's for ^800, and so on. But my little ^2,500 place was assessed for ^3,800, and several others at a similar rate. I quietly ascertained just the amount each property owner would sell his estate for and assessed it for just his own valuation. There was some tall howling, but the deed was done, and now if the town don't owe me a vote of thanks I miss my guess. Yours very sincerely, Mary Prouty, Chair- man of Board of Assessors." Mrs. M. Fine ! Splendid ! You did a grand thing for our town, and I am delighted to accept the report. Mrs. Snow. Well, I am not one bit stuck on it. My hus- band knows perfectly well no one would pay ^5,000 for our place. Mrs. Prou. Well, he considers it worth that much, for he said he wouldn't sell it for one cent less. Mrs. D. I am not smitten with Mrs. Prouty's work either. My landlord raised my rent sixty dollars a year because she put his taxes up fifty dollars. Mrs. W. Mine raised the rent too. Mrs. M. We must expect it to cost us something to have our town run properly. The superintendent of streets will please report now. Mrs. J. *' Fellow citizens: My report is not long, but is full of meat. {All the streets she names are in the immediate neighborhood.) I had a street cut from (local) street to {local) street. {Local) street has been repaved and {local) street has been widened. I had a granolithic sidewalk laid on {local) street. A tunnel has been dug through the hill on {local) street and an esculator put up the hill on [local) street. I wanted to do more but the money gave out, so I had to stop. Respectfully submitted, Amelia Jones (her X mark). P. S. — I cut my hand, so had to have my daughter write this." Mrs. Gate. Well, I never ! She managed to fix up her own neighborhood all right, didn't she ? Mrs. Briggs. If she has the job next year I think I will hire her to move up on {names her street). Well, here goes her report with the others, I suppose. Mrs. M. We will now hear the report of our highway surveyor. A SUFFRAGETTE TOWN MEETING I9 Mrs. D. Well, **The town neglected to supply me with surveying instruments, so I was obliged to tru.st to my eyes alone. 1 visited the highways of our town, that is the highest streets, such as {local ; fiufne some streets on high land), twice during the year, and so far as I could see the sidewalks were laid out on parallel lines and the telegraph posts were equal distances from each other. Very truly yours, in haste, Mary R. Drake." Mrs. M. Next comes the report of the overseers of the poor. Mrs. W. " Officers and ladies : As this has been a specially busy year with me, club work, committee work, church work, company, sickness, and what not, I just turned over the funds appropriated for this work to {name some philanthropic lady)^ who is admirably fitted to perform it. Now, it was enough for her to do the work without having to make a report, so I take the liberty of saying that the funds have be -n ^'idiciously ex- pended and a great deal of good accomplished. In addition to spending the town's money our {najne some woman* s club) club held a rummage sale on {local ; fiame some street in lower part of town) street, thus enabling the poor of our town to clothe themselves with our out-of-date clothing for a mere noth- ing. Your obedient servant, Ella R. White." Mrs. Briggs. Well, what did you do with the proceeds of the sale ? Mrs. W. Oh, we used it to go on an outing to (^some near-by resort). Mrs. M. Well, that report is a little out of the ordinary, but I suppose we will have to accept it. Will the tree warden give her report ? Mrs. Cash (reading). "Know all men by these presents that I, Henrietta V. Cash, tree warden of the town of {local), have superintended the spraying of all trees in our town and have planted twenty-six beautiful new poplar trees on {local) street {the one she lives on) and removed eighteen old un- sightly trees in different sections of the town. Mrs. {locals- name well-known woman) did a lot of complaining because a large branch of a maple tree in front of her house shut off her view of her neighbors across the street ; so I had the offending branch removed. Mrs. {local ; some popular woman) was so modest and retiring that she objected to passers-by seeing her hang out clothes, so I planted three trees in front of her home, and I think that is all. Respectfully submitted, Lucy R. Cash, Tree Warden." 20 A SUFFRAGETTE TOWN MEETING Mrs. Sears. Well, what do you know about that? Next thing people will want the town to build a ten-foot screen about their houses so people can't see what kind of window draperies they have. Mrs. M. Well, we will accept the report. It shows that Mrs. Cash tried to please everybody. Mrs. Gray, what have you to report for the constables ? Mrs. G. First, I don't like the job and won't take it again. I think dirty work like arresting people should be left to the men. (Reads.) " Report of the constables for the town of (Jocal)'. Made ninety-seven arrests during the year. Thirty- nine for intoxication, seven for breaking and entering, eighteen for swearing (you know it is against the law), sixteen for street walking. And I would like to have arrested about twenty young fellows who loaf about street corners making remarks about passers-by. As it was, I broke up several crowds of them. Eight arrested for Sunday card playing, fourteen for selling goods on Sunday, and made eighteen raids for liquor. Now, if any other woman has worked harder than I in the in- terests of this town the last year, I'll wear my last winter's hat another season. Susan Gray, Constable." Mrs. M. a splendid report ; you have done a great service to our beloved town, and I take great pleasure in accepting the report. The milk inspector will now report. Mrs. Snow {reading). "To whom it may concern: I have thoroughly tested milk from every dealer selling in the town, and find that the only one whose milk is always above standard is {local ; some popular milk dealer) 's. Signed, Eliza H. Snow." Mrs. Cate. H'm ! I've wondered how she could afford to take a quart of cream every day from {local ; name same dealer). Mrs. M. Will the fence viewer give her report? Mrs. E. Most delighted. Your Grace. {Reads.) "This is to certify that twice each month I have ascended to the top of {local ; name some hill, tower, or high building) and care- fully viewed for the space of one-half hour the fences of our town, and so far as I could see they were in excellent condition. While making my last trip I was caught in a shower and ruined my new foulard gown, and I herewith present a bill against the town for a new dress — twenty-five dollars. Yours truly, Arabella R. Eaton, Fence Viewer." Mrs. M. But, my dear, we didn't tell you to wear a new A SUFFRAGETTE TOWN MEETING 21 silk gown on a rainy day. It is hardly the regalia of a town officer on duty, and I fear you will have to stand the loss. Why don't you dye the whole dress yourself? It would prob- ably come out lovely ; mine did. Mrs. E. Boo-hoo ! Then I'll never be fence viewer again, and I guess you'll have a time getting any one else for so hard a position. Boo-hoo ! Brid. Shure, I'll take the job, and a shnap it is. Mrs. M. We will accept the report, all excepting the part about the dress, and will now listen to the last report, that of our beloved auditor. Mrs. H. '* My dear Duchess and ladies : ( Wtj^h great itn- pressiveness.) I have faithfully examined the books of the town and found all words spelled correctly and nearly all punctuation marks right. Most cordially, Emma R. Holmes, Auditor." Mrs. M. That ends the reports of the year's work and I am proud of the earnest, thoughtful efforts of our noble town officers, that have given us so clean and well governed a town. {Looks at warrant.) The election of officers for the follow- ing year comes next. Is the nominating committee ready to report ? Mrs. G. We are, and I will read our list of nominations. Board of Selectmen : Mrs. Gate, Mrs. Cash, Mrs. Eaton. Mrs. Gate. I am very sorry, but we move from town next month, so I shall be obliged to decline the nomination, and I move you. Madam Moderator, that Her Grace the Duchess of Waterbury be nominated to serve you in my stead. All. Second the motion. Mrs. M. But I shall only be here for a few months. Mrs. G. Well, you can serve for the time you are here. As you are somewhat modest I will put the vote. Those in favor of Her Grace the Duchess of Waterbury being nominated to serve as chairman of the Board of Selectmen for the coming year, rise. {All rise.) Mrs. G. I will begin again. ''Board of Selectmen: — Duchess of Waterbury, chairman. Mrs. Cash. Mrs. Eaton. Collector of taxes, Mrs. Smart. Treasurer, Mrs. Blunt. Town clerk, Mrs. Briggs. Constables {name three well- known men). School Committee, Mrs. Sears {name two well-known women). Superintendent of streets, Mrs. Jones. 22 A SUFFRAGETTE TOWN MEETING Assessors {iiaine three wealthy wovieii). Milk inspector, Mrs. Snow. Overseers of the poor, Mrs. Drake {name two others). Auditor, Mrs. Holmes. Board of Health, Mrs. Plain {iiavte local ivomeii). Tree wardens {locals if desired). Fence viewers {localy if desired). Highway surveyor {locals if desired).^* Mrs. H. Madam Moderator, I move that the clerk cast one ballot for the entire list. Mrs. Plain. I second the motion. Mrs. M. It is moved and seconded that the clerk cast one ballot for the entire list. Those in favor of that motion will hold up their hands. (All do so.) Please hurry, Madam Clerk ; it is getting late. {Clerk casts ballot and Mrs. M. declares the officers elected.) Mag. Shure, and I object to it. Mrs. M. Why, my dear, what is the trouble ? Mag. Shure the Oirish contingent is lift out intirely. Mrs. M. But those who have no special position are to help in all, you see. Mag. Shure. If you say it's all right, why it goes, your Dukes — er — phwat do they call a Mrs. Duke anyway ? Mrs. M. Now for the list of appropriations. Mrs. Smart. Oh, make it the same as last year to save time. Mrs. D. Same here. Mrs. M. It is moved and seconded that the appropriations be the same as last year ; those in favor of that motion will hold up their hands. {All do so except Mrs. E.) It is a vote. Mrs. E. Hold on a minute. I think last year's appro- priation for the maintenance of schools was much too large. We overpay our teachers. Just think, they only work five hours for five days a week for thirty- eight weeks, and get paid for fifty-two weeks* work of six days each. / think it is out- rageous. Mrs. J. Well, that's all you know about it. I was a teacher, and speak from a long experience. I was in school from 8 : 30 to 12 : 15 a. m., and from i : 15 to 4 P. M., and sometimes until five, and between then and 8 : 30 the next morning spent three or four hours correcting work of the pre- vious day and preparing work for the day to come, so now ! The folks up-stairs in your house do say that you are everlast- A SUFFRAGETTE TOWN MEETING 23 ingly kicking over the noise of their two nice little children. I wonder how you'd like to have forty little imps under your nose all day. Huh ! Nora. Squelched ! Mrs. W. Gracious ! but there's a hornet's nest for you ! Madam Moderator, the appropriation has already been voted, so Mrs. Eaton is out of order. Mrs. M. Mrs. White's point is well taken ; the discussion is out of order. Now we come to the last number on our program, New business. Has any one any new business to bring before this meeting ? Mrs. Prou. Yes, I have. I wish the town would have some new steps built in front of this building. The present ones are so high that women with fashionable skirts have to come up the stairs sidewise. Mrs. W. And the front door is much too narrow for picture hats, so we may as well have a wider door built while we are about it. Mrs. G. 1 want the (Jocal^ railroad company to be com- pelled to burn hard coal. The cinders from that horrid soft coal gets all over my clean washing every Monday. Mrs. E. Well, I want a clock placed in the tower of this building — one that strikes. Every clock in my house tells a different hour, and as a result I got to church five minutes too early last Sunday, and the next day my Evangeline was late to school, because I set the clock too far ahead. Mrs. Cash. Well, I want milkmen prohibited from making so much noise with their bottles in the middle of the night. It always wakes my baby up. Mrs. J. Well, I want them to stop putting that pesky oil on the streets ; my hall rugs are a sight. I have half a mind to make the town buy me some new ones. Mrs. Snow. Well, I want street car conductors to be in- structed to look up and down each street, to see if some one is running for the car. It is outrageous the way they whiz past our street when I am nearly to the corner, and half killing my- self with running. Mrs. D. Well, what I want is to have our public libraries compelled to buy at least twenty copies of every new novel. I never can get them until they are nearly worn out and quite out of date. Mrs. H. Well, I want our teachers to just stop giving so much home work to our children. My Ellen doesn't have a 24 A SUFFRAGETTE TOWN MEETING chance to wipe dishes, or even make her own bed nowadays, she has so many lessons to get. We pay our teachers to teach the children, not to keep them up half the night to teach them- selves. Mrs. Plain. Good for you. My sentiments entirely. I think they ought to begin half an hour earlier and keep half an hour later, and have no home work and sensible lessons. It would do my Mattie much more good to learn to make a loaf of bread and to sew a straight seam than to know how many flowers grow in swampy ground, and how many miles away the nearest planet is. Mrs. Blunt. Well, what I want is to go home right straight off, so I move to adjourn, and to lay all these matters on the table until the next regular town meeting. Mag. I second the motion. (^Motion is put and carried by ong vote. As soon as the moderator declares the vote^ Mr. Manchester enters.) Nora. A man ! Mrs. M. Albert ! Mr. M. I've had a cablegram. All. Well ? Mr. M. {to wife). It was a mistake. It was two other boys that were drowned, and uncle, although prostrated, will recover. Mrs. M. Oh ! Oh ! Oh ! How glad I am. How per- fectly splendid. Why, ladies, those dear boys weren't drowned after all. All. What? Mr. M. It was a mistake. It was two other young men, and we are greatly rejoiced. Mrs. Smart. Then you aren't a Duke. Mr. M. {smiling). No, lady. Only a common ordinary man. Mrs. Smart. Well, I think your wife has played a very shabby trick upon us. {To Mrs. M.) You may consider my invitation revoked, Mrs. Manchester. [Exit, Mrs. Cash. And mine also, woman ! [Exit, Mrs. Prou. And mine, you common carpenter's wife. [Exit, Mrs. Sears. I shall denounce her as a public impostor. [Exit. A SUFFRAGETTE TOWN MEETING 2$ Mrs. G. 1 am going to read up the law on such matters and see if I can't arrest her. \_jExif. Mrs. E. Really, I can't breathe the air in the same room with such a wholesale fraud. \_£xi/. Mrs. J. Well, I shan't ever speak to her again. lExif. Mrs. D. / think it was just a put up job to get elected moderator. [^JSxif. Mr. M. Why, what does this mean ? Mrs. H. It means that just the minute those snobs thought your wife was a Duchess, they almost brushed off her boots with their handkerchiefs. Mr. M. Oh ! I see. And they really made you moder- ator of the meeting ? Brid. Shure, and she made a dandy one too. Nora. And they made her chairman of the Board of Select- men for the next year. Mr. M. What ! Mrs. Plain. Yes, thank goodness thaf can't be revoked. Mrs. Gate. I move that the proceedings of this meeting be declared null and void, and that we hold another meeting one week from to-night. Mrs. W. Second the motion. Hurry up and put it, Mrs. Briggs. Mrs. Briggs {sarcastically). I am so sorry, ladies, but the meeting has already adjourned, and your motion is too late, and would be out of order anyway. Nora, put them out. {Goes out.) (Nora, Brid. and Mag. chase Mrs. Gate and Mrs. W. out.) Mrs. M. But how did you know about the boys being alive ? Mr. M. I got a cablegram just now. They got our cable of sympathy yesterday, and were so pleased with it that they are going to make us a gift of ten thousand pounds. All. Oh ! Brid. Shure, that's ^50,000. Mr. M. {continuing). In appreciation of our sorrow for them and a thank offering for their boys being spared, and they are coming to visit us next summer. Nora. Oh ! Mrs. Smarty ! Mrs. Smarty ! Let me hurry home to tell her. 26 A SUFFRAGETTE TOWN MEETING Brid. Shure, let's all of us go and get ready for torch-light parade in honor of our chairman of selictmin. Mag. Three cheers for Mrs. Manchester, who is good as a Duchess if she ain't one. {They give three cheers while going out) CURTAIN- Plays for Colleges and High Schools The following plays have been given successfully in many of High Schools and Colleges in all parts of the United States, can so far be recommended to other institutions of this sort. the and All Tangled Up Bachelor Hall (25c.) The Bigelows' Butler The Blundering Mr. BroWB A Box of Monkeys Comrades (25c.) The Cool Collegians (25c.) The Doctor (25c.) The Elopement of Ellen (25c.| Down by the Sea For One Night Only Higbee of Harvard His Last Chance A Lion Among Ladies Me an' Otis Mrs. Briggs of the Poultry Yard (26c Mrs. Compton's Manager My Cousin Timmy Our Folks Out of Town (25c.) A Rival bvRequest Tommy's Wife (25c.) Up to Freddie Valley Farm (25c.) Chums (25c.) Class Day (25c.) Her Busy day My Lord in Livery The Revolving Wedgo Two College Tramps A Class Day Conspiracy Quits _ ., The Obstinate Family The Peacemaker Paddle Your Own Canoe The Flying Wedge (25c.) A Romantic Rogue A Rice Pudding (25c.) A Rank Deception Old Acre Folks Nephew or Uncle (25c.) Comedy « Farce Prama Comedy (( tt Drama Comedy «t Acts Males Females 3 5 3 ,) Comedy (I (t Drama Comedy Farce-Comedy Drama Farce «4 Comedy College Comedy 3 11 Price Jljleen cents each unless otherwise stated. SENT. POSTPAID. ON RECEIPT OF PRICE. BY BAKER. 5 Hamilton Place, Boston, Mass. New Plays THE SILVER SPOON A Character Sketch in Four Parts By yoseph S. Jones Ten males, nine females. Costumes, modern ; scenery varied but not difficult. Plays a full evening. A revised and reconstructed version of this old play, Jefferson Scattering Batkins, by William Warren, vi^as one of the notable theatrical achievements of its time. The satire of the old piece is as fresh to-day as in its youth, and a revival would be full of interest. Pricey /J cents. CHARACTERS Jefferson Scattering Bat- Miss Hannah Partridge. KINS, tnember of the General Sarah Austin. Court from Cranberry Centre. Abby Bacon, a girl from Craw Glandon King, a young gentle- berry Centre. man of fortune. Miss Asia Greenwood, a city Ezra Austin, a Boston Joiner. belle. Col. Jerome Splendid Silk, Miss Nightingale {«////45^«f). a speculator. Mrs. Chauncey Shady. Simon Feedle, a lawyer. Miss Swallow. Tom Pinfeather. Miss Righting. Mr. Francis Perkins. Miss Bird, of "The Saints' Rest Biles, a cabman, No. ig82. Society." Bite, a sheriff s officer. Waiters, Dancers, Policemen, Waiter. etc. LONDON ASSURANCE A Comedy in Five Acts By Dio7i L. Boucicault Ten males, three females. Costumes may be modern or of the period, as preferred ; scenery, two interiors and one exterior. Plays a full even- ing. The Boston Museum version of this famous comedy, which is so full of movement and of life, and so absolutely well suited to the actor's ends that it never grows old in effect. Strongly recommended for school performance, as well as for amateur acting in general. This version con- tains all the usual cuts, alterations, and *' gags." Price, /J cents A SCRAP OF PAPER A Comedy in Three Acts By J. Palgrave Siinpson Six males, six females. Costumes, modern ; scenery, three interiors. Plays a full evening. The Boston Museum version of this delightful piece with all the usual cuts and " gags." A perfect play for practiced ama- teurs, high in tone, sprightly in movement, vividly interesting in story and offering good parts to all. Price, I J cents New Farces THE ELOPEMENT OF ELLEN A Farce Comedy in Three Acts By Marie J, Warren Four males, three females. Costumes modern ; scenery, one interior an4 ane exterior. Plays an hour and a half. A bright and ingenious little Diay, admirably suited for amateur acting. Written for and originally produced by Wellesley College girls. Strongly recommended. Frice^ 2^ cents TOMMY'S WIFE A Farce in Three Acts By Marie J, Warren Three males, five females. Costumes modern ; scenery, two interiors. Plays an hour and a half. Originally produced by students of Wellesley College. A very original and entertaining play, distinguished by abun- dant humor. An unusually clever piece, strongly recommended. Price i 23 cents ALL CHARLEY'S FAULT An Original Farce in Two Acts By Anthony E, Wills Six males, three females. Scenery, an easy interior ; costumes modem. Plays two hours. A very lively and laughable piece, full of action and admirably adapted for amateur performance. Dutch and Negro comedy characters. Plays very rapidly with lots of incident and not a dull mo- ment Free for amateurs, but professional stage rights are reserved by the author. Strongly recommended. PricCy i^ cents OUT OF TOWN A Comedy in Three Acts By Bell Elliot Palmer Three males, five females. Scene, an interior, the same for all three acts ; costumes modern. Plays an hour and a half. A clever and inter- esting comedy, very easy to produce p.nd recommended for amateur per. formance. Tone high and atmosphere refined. All the parts good. A safe piece for a fastidious audience, as its theme and treatment are alike beyorid reproach. New Recitations BAKER'S HUMOROUS SPEAKER Readings and Recitations for School or Platform, including pieces in Yankee, English, French, German and Scotch dialect* One hundred and sixty-four selections in prose and verse by Mark Twain, Will Carlton, R. J. Burdette, O. W. Holmes, Betsy Bobbitt, M. Quad, Bill Nye, Max Adeler, John Phoenix, Artemas Ward and others. 307 pages. PRICE, 25 CENTS. BAKER'S PATRIOTIC SPEAKER A Collection of the Best Patriotic Selections for School or Platform* Seventy-aix selections in prose and verse by Will Carlton, F. H. Gassaway, Bret Harte, Joaquin Miller, T. W. Higginson, John L. Swift, John G. Whittier, Gen. Sherman, H. B. Sargent, T. DeWitt Talmage and others. Reprinted from The Grand Army Speaker. 149 pages. PRICE, 25 CENTS, Selections from Standard Authors For School and College. Nearly one hundred selections from standard authors, comprising gems from such writers as Shakespeare, Tennyson, Macaulay, Irving, Scott, Dickens, Browning, Byron, Sheil, Leigh Hunt, Poe, Hazlitt, Hood, Bayard Taylor, I)e Quincy, Lowell, Owen Meredith, Longfellow, Bryant, Trowbridge, Victor Hiigo, Sumner, Webster, and many others. 240 pages. PRICE, 50 CENTS, Sent post-paid on receipt of price by Walter H. Baker & Co., 5 Hamilton Place BOSTON, MASS. New Plays A RUSSIAN UOMANCE A DRAMA IN THREE ACTS For Female Characters only By Helen Kane Author of "A Point of Honor," etc. Sixteen female characters. Scenes, two interiors ; costumes modern. Plavs two hours. A very exceptionally dramatic and effective play for all women, high in tone and quite above the average m quahty. Calls for strong acting by three of its characters, has several good character parts and a number of minor parts that call for handsome dressmg. An excellent play ior a woman's club, easy to stage and absorbing in interest. Confidently recommended to the best taste. Price, 25 cents CHARACTERS Mlle. Sannom {Olga Petrwina), a Mrs. Tremainb, cousin to Mrs. Will' Russian refugee ner ; a ** manager." MADAME IGNATIEFF, tvife of the Rus- Lady Gray, wife [of English Ambaa- sian Ambassador. ^J^^^- -c^.,.,^^™ -f ttK^^i. MADAME LuYOFF wife of Attochi, Madame DE Fa YEUSE,tw/eo/J?VencA Russian Embassy. , Minister. MRS. WiLLNER, Wife of Senator,— Mrs. Weston, "^ Callers at Sen- kindly and inconsequent. Mrs. Ellett, ator Wtllner s ASENATH, her daughter, aged eighteen; Miss de Lorme, VThts number may romantic but loyal. Miss Fairfax, 6e increased t/de- LoRNA, her ''Baby," aged six; rebel- Miss de Peyster.J sirable. lims—" enfant terrible." Sasha, maid at Russian. LegaUf^.U HuiiDAH, maid to Mrs. Willner. SYNOPSIS ACT I. Scene 1. —At Senator Willner 's. Olga (Mile. Sannom) arrives in America, in search of her brother. Scene 2. — The same. She " manages " the " unmanageable. ACT II. Scene 1. — " Calling day " at Senator Willner's. Olga meets an old friend, and is seen by her enemy. ^^ , ^, „ c?i.^^{„ Scene 2. — At the Russian Embassy. Story of the escape from Siberia. The enemv threatens. . ^, , . ACT III. Scene 1. — At the Embassy again. Olga meets her enemy. Scene 2. — At Mrs. Willner's. The enemy conquered. THE LAND OF HEART'S DESIRE A FAIRY PLAT By W. B, Yeats Three male, three female characters. Scenery, a plain interior ; cos- tumes, Irish peasant. Plays half an hour. An excellent example of this author's work. It has been extensively used in this country by schools of acting, and the present edition was made for this purpose. Pei'ieetty act- able, but most unconventional in form and treatment. Offered to atttdenti rather than for acting. Price^ 16 cents CEO 13 191? NEW CHRISTMAS ENTERTAINMENTS Kriss Kringle^s Panorama Of Pantomimes, Tableaux, Readingfs, Recitations^ Illustrated Poems, Music, etc This is a compendium of material for the celebration of Christman Iw school hall, or at home. The selections are carefully made and skilfully employed and arranged, so that variety and novelty may be given to almost any length of programme made up from its matter. Price S3 Cents CONTENTS A Christmas Carol. (Concert Exercise) Bev. A. J. Ryan A Christmas Carol '^'^•^^3^'^ A Christmas Eve Adventure '^'/'irn^ZuL A Christmas Party 'Jr''^-^^^ Carlton A Distant Carol K.VanHarhngen Angelic Song, The ......Ivy English An Old Roundsman's Story. (Pantomime) Margaret Eytxnge Around the World with Santa Claus Children's Day, The. (Tableaux) Children's Gifts, The CT"^"r««V^*7/n^A Christmas Bells S. W. Longfellow Christmas Bells • -■ T"'Tf"whi'tP Christmas Comes but Once a Year -l». -«• ^vn^le Christmas Eve in the Street. (Pantomime) -';•••' it"A^''J''/^ Christmas Guest, The Helen Angell Goodwin Christmas Morning Christmas Morning Christmas Shopping. (Pantomime) • •• • • • • • • • • • •*•••••• Driver's Christmas, The Mrs. M. L. Rayne Filling the Stocking. (Pantomime) o**t"d"V1 Jack Frost and the Christmas Tree ^- «/• JiurKe KiTTiE to Santa Claus 'nV ' "^* *Tr" lir-zl^U Lady Judith's Vision, The. (Tableaux) Mrs. E. V. Wilson Lament of a Left-over Doll, The Merry Christmas On the Quiet. (Pantomime) 'w^y/i'w''n'nV't Prince of Life, The wniinZ'TS?.ol 8NOW Angel, The Wallace Bruce Story Katie Told, The. (Pantomime)... 'i:j""';,"i^''JJh'r,'i'i Swipsey's Christmas Dinner. (Statuary) • • -^^«'^^^^"'^*^fjj Two Little Stockings, The. (Tableaux) Sarah Keables Hunt Sent, postpaid, on receipt of price, by BAKER, 5 HAMILTON PLACE, BOSTON, MASS, Jl* m; Pinero's Plays Price, 50 getits Cacb Min PUAMMn Play in Four Acts. Six males, five females. lYilU-l,>ni\iiilEiLi Costumes, moderu; scenery, three interiors. Plays two and a half hours. THE NOTORIOUS MRS. EBBSMITH 2:;^"' '^^,Z males, five females. Costumes, modern; scenery, all interiors. Plays a full evening. THC PDHFIir'ATF Play in Four Acts. Seven males, five iriEt rIvv/rijlvl/i.lEi females. Scenery, three interiors, rather elaborate ; costumes, modern. Plays a full evening. TOP CPOnnf MICTDrCC Farce in Th?ee Acts. Nine males, InCi OLnUULlTllOlIVEiiJO seven females. Costumes, mod- ern; scenery, three interiors. Plays a full evening. THE SECOND MRS. TANQUERAY Igt'^Sl^S^e females. Costumes, modern; scenery, three interiors. Plays a full evening. CWEFT f AVrMnrD Comedyin Three Acts. Seven males, OVYLLl LAVEillULIV four females. Scene, a single interior, costumes, modern. Plays a full evening. TOr TUITMnrODAI T Comedv'in Four Acts. Ten males, InCi InUllULIVDUH nine females. Scenery, three interi- ors; costumes, modern. Plays a full evening. TIJI7 TIIUIFQ Corned V in Four Acts. Six males, seven females. I llL 1 llTilLiJ Scene, a single interior ; costumes, modem. Plays a full evening. TUP \UV K WD CrV Comedy in Three Acts. Eight males, lnl!i tVEiAIV.LIV OEiA eight females. Costumes, modern; scenery, two interiors. Plays a full evening. A WIFE WITHOUT A SMILE '^^SL^,^^^,£Sl Costumes, modern ; scene, a single interior. Plays a full evenmg. Sent prepaid on receipt of price by Salter ?|. ISafeer Sc Company No. 5 Hamilton Place, Boston, Massachusetts 016 102 457 3^ecent popular ^a^s THF AWAK'FNINfi ^^^^ ^" '^'^^^ ^^^^- ^^ ^- ^- chambers. luL< A TT AlVlwmiiU Four males, six females. Scenery, not ditti- cult, chi'^fly interiors ; costumes, modern. Plays a full evening. Px'ice, 50 Cents. THE FRUITS OF ENLIfiBTENMENT ^^^^lotJn.^^^: one males, eleven females. Scenery, characteristic interiors ; cos- tumes, modern. Plays a full evening. Kecommended for reading clubs. Price, 35 Cents. HIS EXCELLENCY THE GOVERNOR 5^?!"^*^^^ %?2 males, three females. Costumes, modern ; scenery, one interior. Acting rights reserved. Time, a full evening. Price, 50 Cents. MinFAl HINRAKn comedy in lour Acts. By OscAK Wilde. \vui\u iiiUiJUrtin/ Nine males, six females. Costumes, mod- ern; scenery, three interiors. Plays a full evening. Acting rights reserved. Sold for reading. Price, 50 Cents. THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING EARNEST Sr,- ^] -^^m Wilde. Five males, four females. Costumes, modei'n ; scenes, two interiors and an exterior.. Plays a full evening. Acting rights re- served. Price, 50 Cents. LADY WINDERMERE'S FAN '^S^'^i:^'^,^lS^1t males. Costumes, modern ; scenery, three interiors. Plays a full evening. Acting rights reserved. Price, 50 Cents. NATHAIV HAI F ■^^^^' "^ ^^^^^ ^^^^- -^^ Clyde Fitch. Fifteen I'AlIlAli \xA\4\4 males, four females. Costuiues of the eighteenth century in America. Scenery, four interiors and two exteriors. Act- ing rights reserved. Plays a full evening. Price, 59 Cents. THF HTHFU FFTTHW Comedy in Three Acts. BvM. B. Horxe. 1111/ UlULn rmLrVTT Six males, four females. Scenery, tMO interiors ; costumes, modern. Professional stage rights reserved. Plays a full evening. Price, 50 Cents. THE TYRANNY OF TEARS SSt.JS.^Frrtfa'fe^^u^rS, l- males. Scenery, an interior and an exterior ; costumes, modern. Acting rights reserved. ' Plays a full evening. Price, 50 Cents. A WOMAN OF NO IMPORTANCE grA'lvfJr^ig^t^a.?!; seven females. Costumes, modern ; scenery, three interiors and an exterior. Plays a full evening. Stage rights reserved. Offered for reading only. " Price, 50 Cents. Sent prepaid on receipt of price by 5^alter i^. QSafier d Company No. 5 Hamilton Place, Boston, Massachusetts 6. J. PARKHILL & CO., PRINTERS, BOSTON.