>S 3503 
 R814 
 
 
 Qo(Jitatioi75 
 
 of a 
 
 ttfraffir OInp 
 
 %. J. Iromn 
 
0%^ 
 
 
 s> 
 
Digitized by tine Internet Arciiive 
 in 2011 witii funding from 
 Tine Library of Congress 
 
 littp://www.arcliive.org/details/cogitationsoftraOObrow 
 
Qlugitatinua of a Srafftc QIoji 
 
DEDICATED 
 
 to the men and women I have known, all 
 of whom have helped make my life a little 
 more worth the living:. 
 
 Here^s to you, friends, both old and new, 
 A tribute both sincere and true, 
 
 With earnest hope that naught may ever. 
 The sacred links of friendship sever. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 LIY COUNTRY'S CALL 
 
 My Country calls, 
 And shall I fail to hear, 
 Or heed her call 
 Whom I hold dear, 
 And reverence? 
 
 My Country calls, 
 And shall I fail to give 
 I^Iy all to her 
 In whom I live 
 For her defence? 
 
 My Country calls, 
 And shall I hold my life 
 Too great a gift 
 In the fierce strife 
 For Liberty? 
 
 My Country calls, 
 
 And gladly will I hear 
 
 And give, and die 
 
 That Freedom dear 
 
 Maj' never die. 
 
 Too many people are trying to get ahead with 
 a rabbit's foot. 
 
 It is the practice of some men to work their em- 
 j)loyers. instead of working for them. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 FREEDOM'S STAR 
 
 Oh! glorious star of freedom that lights the west- 
 ern sky, 
 
 Shine out in radiant beauty, for every longing eye. 
 
 Shine o'er the storm-tossed "waters, where ship- 
 wrecked nations lie, 
 
 Let all their sons and daughters behold thee ere 
 they die. 
 
 Thou star, whose rays effulgent have been a bea- 
 con light 
 
 To countless martyred heroes, thru ages dark as 
 night, 
 
 Shine on the fields of battk^ hy struggling mil- 
 lions trod, 
 
 Till the ways of men be lighted to the very throne 
 of God. 
 
 And, oh star, do thou shine the briglitest, where 
 
 dwells earth's darkest night, 
 Where greed, and lust of tyrants have hidden thee 
 
 from sight. 
 Shine till the world be lighted, till every eye shall 
 
 see, 
 Till every Avrong be righted, and every land be 
 
 free. 
 
 It takes ideas, ideals, and actions, to make a 
 really great character. 
 
 If a man has bristles, he's sure to show them 
 when he drives an automobile. 
 
 If eggs go much higher, the hens will just about 
 have to build their nests in trees to sit on them. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 A CHRISTMAS CAROL. 
 
 The moonlight shone down on a calm, peaceful 
 scene, 
 
 And out of the star studded sky 
 An anthem, burst forth, such as never I ween 
 Had been heard before, or e'er shall be again, 
 
 At the sound of a new born babe's cry. 
 For the Angels of God left their Heavenly place, 
 And the stars left their course, the Child's advent 
 
 to grace, 
 And wise men from the East came to look on the 
 face, 
 
 Of the Child, whose bright star they had 
 seen. 
 
 And the shepherds, roused up from their watch in 
 the night 
 
 By the anthem repeated again, 
 On their faces fell down, as there fell on their sight 
 Such a vision as filled them with aM' e, and affright ; 
 
 And the message to children of men 
 Rang out in that anthem of "peace," and "good 
 
 will", 
 Till the earth, and the sky with its sound seemed 
 
 to fill— 
 And hark, on the air, they're repeating it still. 
 
 As they did on that first Christmas 
 bright. 
 
 No; hay fever is not necessarily confined to grass 
 widows. 
 
 Too many people are looking for opportunities 
 through a telescope, Avhen they should be using a 
 magnifying glass. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 CALL TO ARMS 
 
 House ye, my country-men! and as one man arise, 
 To smite a cruel foe, who ev'ry laAV defies. 
 '^Tiirice armed is he, whose cause is just" 
 And if we war. then win we must, 
 For in God's arm alone we trust, — 
 In Ilim our power lies. 
 
 Kouse ye, my country-men! In Freedom's name 
 arise 
 Xor let the haughty foe. our trust in God despise, 
 As ravished Belgium's prostrate form 
 AVe view amid the battle's storm, 
 May love for Freedom, fierce, and warm. 
 Inspire each sacrifice. 
 
 Iiouse ye, my country-men ! AVhv will ye falter 
 still- 
 Have ye the heart to how unto a tyrant's will? 
 What hope have ye, if ye shall spare 
 To smite a foe so gross, and vdiere 
 Your refuge if you fail to dare 
 Your duty to fulfill. 
 
 Ivise up, my countri«-men! nor dare the SAVord to 
 sheath 
 Till Freedom's ev'ry foe her banners bow 
 beneath. 
 Remember pledges unfulfilled, 
 And treaties broken, as they willed 
 By men in base deceiving skilled, — 
 AYho foul the air they breathe. 
 
 Rise now. my country-men! lest Freedom's eiw l)e 
 vain. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 For Freedom crushed to earth, may never rise 
 again. 
 Strike, and your country's cause defend; 
 Strike, that war's cruel curse may end; 
 Strike, lest a greater curse descend, 
 The curse of Slav'ry's chains. 
 
 THE JOHNNY YANKS. 
 
 Bless my bloomin' 'eart it's rippin' 
 'Ow the Johnny Yanks come trippin', 
 H'and the kaisers feet's a slippin' 
 
 Down the 'ill. 
 Wile the cannons roared an thundered, 
 'Indcnburg, an' Tirpitz wondered 
 'Ow in 'ell they'd gone an' blundered, 
 
 Kaiser Bill. 
 For they said, ''That Yankee Duffer 
 'E's a bloomin' blow an' bluffer 
 An' e'll never stand to suffer, — 
 
 But 'e will. 
 Now they've got another notion, 
 For 'e's comin' o'er the ocean. 
 An' 'e's raised, a big commotion. 
 
 For you Bill. 
 Witli your U-boats, an' Zeppelins, 
 'Oav your 'ead was 'urt with swcllin's. 
 But they've busted all your melons, 
 
 "Aus ge spiel." 
 An' your plans to rule creation. 
 Roused a 'ole world's hindignation, 
 An' you're doomed to degradation. 
 
 Kaiser Bill. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 GRANDFATHER. 
 
 (h-andfather sits in his old arm-chair, 
 
 And ^^'aLehes the smoke as it curls in the air, 
 
 Wliile he peacefully puffs on his old cob pipe, 
 
 And dreams of the past, in his old age, ripe. 
 
 lie tells of the days back in sixty-one, 
 
 When the war that he fought in was just begun, — 
 
 Of the stornw scenes, and of Sumpter's fall. 
 
 And the gallant response to Lincoln's jcall. 
 
 Of his campaigns, and battles, so often retold. 
 
 From the rout at Bull Run to the horrors untold 
 
 Of Andersonville, and of Libby as well, 
 
 AVhere his comrades, and he, bore the torments of 
 
 Hell. 
 And then as he rouses from dreams of the past, 
 And his eye takes new fire, and his pulse beats 
 
 more fast, 
 
 ric vo'.vs that through hardships, through flood, or 
 
 through flame. 
 He would follow that flag into battle again. 
 And we know that Grandfather means what he 
 
 says, 
 .Tnst as much as he did in those old by-gone days, 
 For Ills heart is still loyal— his soul is still true, 
 Tliough an empty sleeve hangs from his old coat 
 
 of blue. 
 
 If you were going to put some men on their 
 lionor, it would be a good idea to find out before 
 liiiiid, Avhat kind of a perch they were ""oino- to 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 A VALID CLAIM. 
 
 I've come here to claim exemption from a servin' 
 
 in the war, 
 Tho' it ain't bin my intention fer I knowed I'd 
 
 be sent for, — 
 But sence then I've ben a thinkiu' uv the thhigs 
 
 I've got to do. 
 An' t'nd drive a man to drinkin' jes to try to 
 
 think 'em through. 
 Fer I haf to tote the washin's my ol' lady does 
 
 each day, 
 Though she says, "Good land 'Goshen, " she 
 
 "could make it any way," 
 An' a runnin' to the naybors fer to borry starch 
 
 an' soap, 
 An' a lot uv other labors that you'll never have, 
 
 I hope. 
 An' sometimes I'm druv plum crazy jest a runnin' 
 
 here an' there, 
 Then my ol' woman says I'm "lazy;" that I never 
 
 ' ' wet a liair ; ' ' 
 Says, she "hopes the armj^ gets me, fer I ain't 
 
 no use to her, 
 But a talk like that upsets me,— guess that's what 
 
 she does it fer. 
 An' ef I don't get exempted so's to help her all 
 
 I can, 
 How'd I knov/ but shell be tempted fer to got 
 
 another man. 
 An' while I am dead an' buried some 'er's yonder 
 
 fur away, 
 He'll be totin' home the washin's my ol' lady does 
 
 each day. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 THE AVIATORS. 
 
 Tlie people are roaring, as loose from their moor- 
 ing, the prices go soaring for goodness knoAvs 
 
 Avliere. 
 But high and still higher, thej^'ve taken a flyer, nor 
 
 paused to inquire, if we will be there. 
 Our bread and our butter, farewell to us utter, as 
 
 upward they flutter as if in affright. 
 Our beefsteak and bacon, their farewell have taken, 
 
 while bankrolls are breakin' to keep them in 
 
 sight. 
 Our fuel for burning, is out of discerning, nor looks 
 
 like returning, much nearer to view. 
 And so with each garment, that's to keep us warm 
 
 meant, some ornery varmint has raised on 
 
 them, too. 
 Now won't you please tell us, j^ou people who sell 
 
 us. since this thing befell us, what Ave are to do. 
 For if Ave keep eating, Avearing clothing, or heating, 
 
 Ave'll ncAcr be meeting the bills AA-hen they're 
 
 due. 
 
 Common sense is a A'ariety that is A'ery uncom- 
 mon. 
 
 That AA'hich you can do best, do, and trust God 
 i(\i' the rest. 
 
 A man who is not square with the men he works 
 Avith, AA'ill not be square Avith the man for whom 
 he Avorks. 
 
 You never hear the felloAV aa^Iio is soAving his Avild 
 oats singing "Bringing in the Sheaves," or "Wliat 
 Will Hie Harvest Be?" 
 
COGITATION kS 
 
 THE THING THAT COUNTS. 
 
 It matters not so much, my boy, that you have 
 
 taken a fall, 
 Or more than one, when it comes to that, 
 I'or thmgs often happen that knock you fiat, 
 And to lay with your shoulders pinned close to 
 
 the mat 
 
 Is a thing that has happened to all. 
 
 But this. is what matters, in fact, my boy, when you 
 
 have taken a fall, 
 Tho it may have been to the brink of Hell, 
 With bruises and scars too awfal to tell. 
 What matters, is, whether you lay where you fell. 
 Or struggled to rise thru it all. 
 
 I'or the stone that lies in your path, my boy. or 
 
 the pit that is hid by the way, 
 ^lay be for you only just what they are. 
 Or, the pain of each bruise, and the sight of eacli 
 
 scar 
 May help you to efforts more earnest by far. 
 Than those of another da,y. 
 
 So, it matters not quite so ranch, my bo3^ that you 
 
 have taken a fall. 
 Or more than one, in your journey thru life, 
 As that you have been true to yourself, in its strife, 
 And have risen again with new vigor and life 
 And have striven to rise thru it all. 
 
 You may not cash in on courtesy in dollar divi- 
 dends but it pays just the same. 
 
 Too much of the repentance is for being caught 
 with the goods, instead of for being guilty. 
 
C a I T A T I N S 
 
 HE DIDN'T KNOY\^ 
 
 In the far v/est one encounters many things that 
 are strange and new, and in the politics of the 
 Avestern country many situations arise that couUl 
 liiirdly be duplicated the \vorld ove:--. 
 
 In one of the largest and best known communi- 
 ties in one of the states referred to, they had for 
 their County Superintendent of Education, a native 
 of the country, named Cristobal Esquibel, who was 
 chiefly noted for what he did not know about 
 matters educational. 
 
 It is told that on one occasion he was discussing. 
 with a number of other politicians, the chances of 
 a eercain candidate for office, vrhen one of the 
 men present spoke up and said "Why that man 
 hasn't a chance; he's as dead as Christopher Col- 
 umbus ' '. 
 
 "Why," said Esquibel, "is Columbus dead?" 
 
 At this everybody laughed, and one of them said, 
 "Didn't you knov*^ that, Esquibel?" 
 
 "Well,"' the latter replied slowly, "I heard he 
 was pretty blame sick, but I didn't know he was 
 dead." 
 
 Cussing seems to get more out of some men than 
 coaxing. 
 
 If you really want to help, lay aside your ham- 
 mer, and get a crowbar. 
 
 A man may live on what he earns, but Avhen he 
 starts getting rich he must have help. 
 
 Political fights would not be so bad if the in- 
 .iured could be kept from exhibiting tbeir wounds. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 OUR THANKSGIVING 
 
 Thanksgiving day is coming, and as the day draAvs 
 
 near, 
 In thought our minds go roaming thru strife, and 
 
 death, and fear. 
 We see a world disordered, as every land we view, 
 I'ioodshed, and plague, and famine triumphant, 
 
 thru and thru. 
 And Nations strong arising 'gainst Nations great 
 
 and strong, 
 \n mighty wrath and anger, rejecting right for 
 
 wrong. 
 And, as we vieAv with horror, each deadly, dreadful 
 
 scene. 
 As tho the rape of Mercy were pictured on a 
 
 screen, 
 ^lost Gracious God, Ave thank Thee, that in Thy 
 
 blessed Avord 
 A lasting peace is promised on Earth to be con- 
 ferred. 
 "When as a tranquil river Avhieh shall no ending 
 
 knoAA', 
 Forever, and forever, the peace of God shall Hoav. 
 
 SAD INDEED. 
 
 Autumn iss here und summer iss A^ent, 
 Vinter iss earning und money's all spent. 
 Vake in der morning all cold and shakey, 
 Ofercoat hung up mit Ikey or Jakey, 
 Saddest of Avords in all historA's pages 
 "Ynf did 1 done mit mA' last su5nm.er's vagcs." 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 OUR FLAG. 
 
 Oh! how can I best describe it; 
 AVhat words can I fittingly use 
 To portraj^ the wonderful beauty 
 That a nation's heart ardently woos. 
 AVhat language would be so enthralling. 
 Whose eloquence, full and complete, 
 Would touch the great pulse of the Nation 
 And bring men as one to their feet. 
 For that flag, full of radiant beauty, 
 Sweet symbol of freedom enshrined 
 And enthroned mid the nations forever, 
 With freedom and love interwined. 
 Whose stars are a symbol of Heaven 
 With its canopied vista of blue, 
 And its red, of the blood of its heroes 
 AVho gave up their lives to be true. 
 And whose white is sweet purity's emblem. 
 Unsullied, unstained, undefiled 
 By battles for greed, or for conquest. 
 Pure and clean as the mind of a child. 
 And see, as in ecstasy flutters 
 Its folds, as they float on the breeze. 
 It seems full of life in its motion, 
 And its light shines afar o'er the seas. 
 And the nations in anguish are waiting 
 Till sweet freedom's story be true. 
 And all flags shall symbolize freedom, 
 As Old Glor}^, the red. white and blue. 
 
 The biggest fool is the one who Avon't quit his 
 foolishness when he finds out it is foolish. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 MOTHER. 
 
 There is a name to me more dear than any other, 
 A name that fills me with the sweetest peace, 
 That calms my soul, and bids my sorrows cease, 
 More potent than all else on earth to please. 
 It is the name of Mother. 
 
 There is a love more sanctified than friend or 
 
 brother, 
 A love that e'en tho bright or dark the skies 
 Toils on, rejoicing in each sacrifice, 
 Eternal, infinite, it never dies, 
 
 This great love is a mother's. 
 
 When in my dreams bright Angels round me hover 
 And fill my soul with holy ecstasy, 
 Sweet strains of Heaven's divinest harmony, 
 I hear : Then radiant with immortalit^f , 
 I see my Sainted Mother. 
 
 There is a hope to me more dear than any other, 
 When from this life my Soul is free. 
 From all the ills of this mortality, 
 That I shall be thru all eternity, 
 United with my Mother. 
 
 Don't place too much trust in the wagging of a 
 (log's tail; it's his face with Avhich he bites. 
 
 If brains were necessary for conversation, a lot 
 of fluent talkers would be mutes. 
 
 It often takes a chase all over the farm to con- 
 vince a man that the "No Hunting" sign was true. 
 
 The fire that burns only one day in seven is in 
 sore need of fuel. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 SHE DIDN'T ATTEND SUCH PLACES. 
 
 The use and misuse of liigh-sounding words by 
 some of the old fashioned southern darkies is a 
 never ending source of amusement. 
 
 At the regular Thursday evening prayer meet- 
 ing of a colored congregation a fire broke out, and 
 in the panic that ensued several of the members 
 ^vere quite severely injured or burned, 
 
 A physician in attendance on one of these cases 
 said, ''So you are one of the ladies who were in- 
 jured in the conflagration, are you?" 
 
 "Well, suh," the lady replied with dignit3^ "I'se 
 one ob de ladies dat got hurt, but I'll liab yoh 
 cndehstan dat it wahn't at no conflagration, hit 
 war at a prayeh meetin at de Baptis' church at 
 Seventeenth an Bohregahd." 
 
 An umpire is a losing team's alibi. 
 
 You can't land a shark by baiting your hook 
 with dough balls. 
 
 "Safety last," seems to be the rule with some 
 people, instead of "safety first." 
 
 A man may have to go into an alley to get his 
 liquor, but he's sure to come onto the avenue 
 to display his load. 
 
 The world today would feel a good deal surer of 
 Solomon's v/isdom had it not been for his well 
 known weakness for weddings. 
 
 Honesty and efficiency are supposed to be alwaj's 
 rewarded, but you'll notice that it's getting into 
 the trough with all four feet that makes fat hogs. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 SOME DAY. 
 
 Tile pho7ie rang out in the midnight still, with its 
 
 silvery sudden alarm, 
 Rousing me up with a quickening thrill, from the 
 
 spell of sweet morpheus charm. 
 The call was from Nell's place, way down on the 
 
 row. Avliore sin and disgrace have their sway. 
 But the message Avas urgent, *'0h please," would 
 
 I go; so, I hastened the call to obey. 
 
 It was one of the girls, who, "grown tired of life, 
 
 had chosen to end it," they said, 
 "Wearied out with its sin, and its sorrow and strife, 
 
 and when I arrived she was dead. 
 And as I looked down on the lifeless face, and pity 
 
 welled up in my heart, 
 I wondered if I, had I been in her place, might 
 
 have played any better, her part. 
 
 For 'twas hers to bear the disgrace and the shame, 
 
 and the censure that comes to her kind. 
 But somewhere, sometime, some one else was to 
 
 blame, some one else to whom fate was 
 
 more kind. 
 And somewhere some day, when a balance is made, 
 
 and the God who is Judge of us all. 
 In judgment shall sit in His glory arrayed, — some 
 
 one then shall account for her fall. 
 
 Some men have heads, others a fat lump on their 
 shoulders. 
 
 If you never make any enemies, your friendship 
 is liardlv worth making. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 IN FREEDOM'S NAME. 
 
 There are sounds of mothers crying, 
 And of sweet-hearts softly sighing. 
 There are tales of men a-dying. 
 
 All in freedom's holj' name. 
 
 There are sounds of men assembling. 
 Never faltering or dissembling, 
 There are tales of Teutons trembling, 
 
 AVhile the world's with war aflame. 
 
 There are sounds of lusty cheering. 
 Sounds of soft low words, endearing, 
 Bravely facing, sadly fearing. 
 
 All in freedom's holy name. 
 
 There are sighs of resignation, 
 Solemn prayers of consecration. 
 And our manhood's dedication. 
 
 To avenge the Teuton shame. 
 
 liord of Heaven, we pray thee hear us. 
 Do Thou draw Divinely near us. 
 By Thy counsel guide us, cheer us. 
 
 Lest Ave err in freedom's name. 
 
 Help us on each field so gory, 
 Striving not for fame or glory, 
 But that earth may stand before Thee, 
 Freed in Heaven's holj' name. 
 
 "What can't be cured" should be insured. 
 
 Some men are so like a crawfish that they make 
 all their progress backward. 
 
 The things that seem hardest to endure, are 
 often most necessary to develop character. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 IN UNION THERE IS STRENGTH. 
 
 It would seem that in every breast the spark of 
 ambition smoulders ready to burst into flame at 
 the slightest encouragement, and that in some 
 cases, not even encouragement is necessary to bring 
 ii to light. 
 
 It happened that in a certain city a traffic law 
 had been passed, and, as is usually the case, there 
 was experienced some difficulty in securing its 
 enforcement. 
 
 There was, however, one officer, a man named 
 Boyle, who alwaj's kept his weather eye open, and 
 had achieved quite a reputation for catching speed- 
 ers. As he was walking his beat one day, a big 
 touring ear came humming along. As it was plain- 
 ly exceeding the speed limit Boyle halted it, and 
 ordered the driver to proceed to the police station. 
 "But, man, you don't know Avho I am," objected 
 the driver, "I am the Commissioner." ''Are ye, 
 thin," said Boyle. "In that case yez needn't report 
 at the station. Sure I may be a commissioner 
 mesilf some day and us Commissioners has got to 
 stick togither. ' ' 
 
 'Tis said, "One touch of nature makes the whole 
 
 world kin," 
 But oft 'times one nature fakir makes the whole 
 
 world grin. 
 
 A policeman is a public weeping post. 
 
 It's not always the man with a cool head who 
 gets cold feet. 
 
 A little courtesy does more good than a lot of 
 cussing. 
 
 If you want to make your stock eat straw, put a 
 fence around it. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 THE VOLUNTEERS. 
 
 Ill peace, as well as in battle, in toil, as well as 
 
 in strife, 
 In the struggles, and trials and turmoil, along the 
 
 dark highways of life, 
 In the days of life's greatest triumphs, or the night 
 
 of its darkest fears, 
 To bear the brunt at the battle's front, is the work 
 
 of the Volunteers; 
 To comfort the broken hearted, to heal on the bed 
 
 of pain, 
 To banish the tears of the anguished, to wipe out 
 
 dishonor 's stain. 
 To give, as the good God giveth, wherever the need 
 
 appears, 
 All done in the name of the Master, is the work 
 
 of the Volunteers. 
 To live, and if need be to suffer; to sow, tho the 
 
 reaping be long. 
 Content that their strength be made weakness, that 
 
 they in His strength be made strong. 
 To stand in the front of the battle, till God's rain- 
 bow shall shine thru their tears. 
 Then to reign thru eternity's ages, is the work of 
 
 the Volunteers. 
 
 Religion is not the only cloak in the wardrobe 
 of the hypocrite. 
 
 If it were not for the value of real money there 
 would be no counterfeits. This is also true of 
 religion. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 PEACE. 
 
 We are longing for the time to come when wars 
 
 shall cease to be, 
 And peace shall reign o'er all the earth, throughout 
 
 eternity. 
 Through all the past the world has felt war's 
 
 constant cruel scourge, 
 And music rare, and anthems sweet, have only 
 
 been a dirge. 
 
 We see men marching to the fray, with proud and 
 
 gallant tread, 
 And many in a little while will number with the 
 
 dead. 
 While weeping eyes, and broken hearts, a great 
 
 unnumbered throng, 
 Bow down the knee, and cry aloud, "How long, 
 
 oh. Lord, how long." 
 
 And Lord, we pray that Thou wilt come, and arm 
 
 Thy righteous cause. 
 That wars may cease, and Thou shalt reign supreme 
 
 in all our laws. 
 That men shall cease from bitter strife, and nations 
 
 be at peace. 
 And eager earth shall welcome in Thy kingdom's 
 
 sure increase. 
 
 The barrel of a very small gun looks as big as 
 any other barrel when you get the right view point. 
 
 Human nature is pretty much the same the world 
 over. The anarchist of yesterday, who gets a little 
 money today, will want to hang the anarchists 
 tomorrow. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 A DREAM. 
 
 A dream I dreamt, a hellish thing, as tho the 
 mind of me had been poisoned by a thousand asps. 
 
 And as I dreamed, I saw outdone as tho by more 
 accustomed minds, and hands, the scenes of the 
 Inferno. 
 
 What fiendish forms were there whose shapes 
 seemed like a man's, yet so unlike, my soul revolted 
 at the sight, for what I saw was only parts of men 
 — a clutching hand — a trunk decapitated, and 
 trunkless heads with wide, staring, unseeing eyes. 
 
 And forms there were that moved, with fearful 
 faces, Ghoulishly grotesque. 
 
 And, as on earth, so in the air huge monsters 
 circled round, or darted swiftly, on destruction 
 bound, while hideous lightnings flashed and 
 thunders roared, and monstrous hail, red hot, fell 
 on the festering earth. 
 
 And in the depths foul fishes fed on human 
 flesh, and, lest they hunger, incarnate fiends in 
 human form supplied them more and more. 
 
 And as I dreamed, the very air seemed poisoned 
 with untruth, till all the minds of men were filled 
 with doubt. 
 
 And high above the awful din I heard the wail 
 of widowed women, and orphaned children's cries. 
 
 And as I stood striving to shut out the awful 
 sights and sounds, I saw two forms, both strangely 
 like to pictured ones I'd seen, but still so like 
 each other, too, that as they walked it seemed 
 they merged in one, Satan, smiling as he viewed 
 his work so ably done, and Kaiser Wilhelm, the 
 Master, — and the Man. 
 
 More potent far than any laws, are courtesy and 
 
 common sense, 
 Which make a man, himself, avoid tliat Avhich to 
 
 him would ffive ofi^ense. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 AUTUMN. 
 
 The air is growing cliill apace, 
 
 The summer days are ended, 
 And Autumn's balmy zephyrs now 
 
 With wintry blasts are blended. 
 
 The pawpaw's ripened in the wood, 
 
 A luscious feast affording, 
 And busy squirrels frisk about, 
 
 Their winter's store a hoarding. 
 
 The wild fox grapes upon the Anne 
 In clustered sweetness hanging, 
 
 And ripe persimmons in the tree. 
 Set childhood memories tanging. 
 
 The trees have doffed their coats of green. 
 And gold and yellow donning, 
 
 Are more resplendent now by far 
 "With Autumn's robe and crowning. 
 
 The air is growing chill apace, 
 And summer days are ended. 
 
 But in these golden Autumn da^'S, 
 Both are Divinelv blended. 
 
 Tliere is a crying need for ''conservation" of 
 conversation. 
 
 The things the human ones bite at wouldn't fool 
 a real sucker a minute. 
 
 The foolishness of a wise man has more point 
 to it than the wisdom of a fool. 
 
 A good deal of the foolishness is sensible enough 
 all right. It just sounds foolish to you. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 The pace that kills — Speeding of course. 
 
 All idle mouth often masks a busy mind. 
 
 Many a man's face owes his feet a debt that 
 it never can pay. 
 
 It takes some men so long to mobilize, that their 
 forces never materialize. 
 
 Many a mule would get b}' unsuspected if he 
 could keep from braying. 
 
 The man who has no prejudices, is not apt to 
 have very strong principles. 
 
 Some men with very quarrelsome faces, have feet 
 that are confirmed noncombatants. 
 
 The reason a good many people tell Satan to get 
 behind them, is so he can give them a boost. 
 
 As a rule the town loafer owes his sartorial 
 elegance to the generosity of a lady friend. 
 
 Do you have trouble making up your mind? 
 Better look and see if j^ou have the makin's. 
 
 A great many people are working their feet to 
 death, while their heads are dying for exercise. 
 
 Usually, when a man starts trying to pull the 
 nails out of his coffin, he finds they are clinched. 
 
 It's never hard to figure out the strategy of a 
 retreat that is made in the face of superior gunfire. 
 
 Too many men like the prodigal son of old, wait 
 till the game has slipped away, and then make a 
 home run. 
 
 There are some men so eloquent that they can 
 preach a whole sermon just by keeping their 
 mouths shut. 
 
 A good many people would not be so willing to 
 give tlie Devil his due if they knew who held the 
 first mortgage on themselves. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 BEST. 
 
 Rest weary soul, rest, thy heavenly goal so soon 
 attained, holdeth for thee, boundless, nn- 
 cliained, Eternal life, and peaceful rest. 
 
 Rest troubled soul, rest, sweet is thy sleep, and 
 undistrest; no more shall pain or care molest 
 thy life, or mar its peaceful rest. 
 
 Rest, sorrowing soul, rest, sweet is thy sleep, calm 
 thy repose, uuM^armed by sun, unchilled by 
 snows, ushers thee in to thy long rest. 
 
 Rest, happy soul, rest, thy Saviour stands on 
 Heaven's shore Avith outstretched hands to wel- 
 come thee to Heavenly lands and give thee 
 rest. 
 
 Uneasy lies the foot that wears a corn. 
 
 Too ninny people are trying to soothe the sore 
 spots with sand paper. 
 
 You will only find great sympathy, where there 
 has been great suffering. 
 
 The more filthy a man's cargo is the more likely 
 he is to want to unload it in public. 
 
 Most men are hero Avorshippers, but modesty 
 prevents them mentioning the hero's name. 
 
 It would be a shame to say that some men had 
 "horse sense," even if you were sore at the horse. 
 
 Some men who can sit and listen to smutty stories 
 by the hour, are sound asleep five minutes after 
 the sermon starts. 
 
 Between acting like a bear, making a monkey 
 of himself, and being made the goat, a man is 
 a pretty good menagerie. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 FRIENDSHIP. 
 
 The days may come, and the days may go, 
 As the days will come and go forever, 
 Like the boundless ocean's ebb and flow. 
 Or the windings of an endless river. 
 The sun will rise and set again, 
 As in the days of other ages 
 Welding new links in friendship's chain, 
 Writing new names in friendship's pages. 
 But as long as the human heart is true, 
 Your friends, dear friend, Avill remember you, 
 And thinking, hope that each day may bring. 
 Abundant good, and no evil thing. 
 
 If you think you can't, you won't. 
 
 The idea seems to prevail that a Miss misses un- 
 less she becomes Mrs. 
 
 It doesn't do much good to look before you leap 
 if you don't light where you look. 
 
 Men often fail to realize where they are till they 
 are too far out on the limb to craAvl back. 
 
 The world owes so many people a living that it 
 is generally in debt to all but the best collectors. 
 
 There are two great battles being fought. One 
 is to get more money; the other is to keep from 
 starving. 
 
 A Avise man plans his work, and then works his 
 plan, but a fool has no stomach for either work 
 or plans. 
 
 The man who can take a drink, or let it alone, 
 is unusually interested in demonstrath\g the first 
 proposition only. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 LOVE. 
 
 Lonely my days and lonely my hours, long are my 
 
 nights and dreary, 
 Shadowed my sun, and bedimmed are my stars, 
 
 hungered my heart, and weary. 
 
 Thinking of thee, dreaming of thee, 
 Filled with an infinite yearning; 
 Idol thou art, enshrined in my heart, 
 Where love's sacred incense is burning. 
 
 Joyful my days, and joy laden mj'- hours, and my 
 
 heart ne'er can grow weary, 
 Eadiant the sun, and glorious the stars, dear one, 
 
 if only you're near me. 
 
 If some people were to take treatment for men- 
 tal trouble, they would have to take absent treat- 
 ments. 
 
 In these "bone dry days" many a poor man car- 
 ries home flour when he hasn't a drop of whiskey 
 in the house. 
 
 Eemember, if you are starting to climb the ladder 
 of success, that every round is greased, and that 
 you'll need lots of sand. 
 
 The next few minutes seem like a little thing, 
 don't they; but the.y may be your connecting link 
 between time and eternity. 
 
 Next to the reckless speeder, the biggest nui- 
 sance is the man who drives his rig to andante time, 
 and won't let you pass on either side. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 MOTOR GOOSE RHYMES 
 
 You have all to lose and nothing to gain 
 When racing Avith a railroad train. 
 
 A public road is never the place, 
 For drivers to stage an auto race. 
 
 When in a tight place, don't make a mistake 
 And dodge around, but use your brake. 
 
 If you must still walk like a jay, 
 Don't holler if a fine you pay. 
 
 Your neighbor's safety, and his rights, 
 Demand that you should dim your lights. 
 
 Where ignorance exists it's better to be wise. 
 
 If you can't stand punishment, there is no place 
 for you at the front. 
 
 The man who laughs loudest at another's mis- 
 fortunes, yells loudest at his own. 
 
 An open countenance is a fine thing, but you 
 shouldn't keep it open all the time. 
 
 Nothing is easier than getting in debt, and most 
 anything else is easier than getting out. 
 
 It's better to arrive a little late through careful 
 driving, than to drive carelessly and not arrive at 
 aU. 
 
 Some men go around bemoaning their luck, when 
 better men are in jail, and smarter ones in the 
 insane asylum. 
 
 Why not tackle one of the numerous jobs that 
 are going a-begging, and give your poor over- 
 worked face a rest. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 THE WONDERFUL PREACHER. 
 
 There once was a wonderful preacher, 
 As potent as Talmage or Beecher, 
 
 Who preached every day 
 
 In a practical way 
 With his actions, not words, for a teacher. 
 
 THE FELLOW NAMED BURKE. 
 
 There once was a fellow named Burke, 
 Who worked every day like a turk 
 
 Till the}^ hoisted the price 
 
 On his coal and his ice. 
 Now he's hoisted the price on his work. 
 
 THE FELLOW NAMED MORSE. 
 
 There once was a fellow named Morse, 
 Who got married for "better or worse," 
 But his wife found a letter, 
 Which proved him no better, 
 So she's suing him now for divorce. 
 
 THE FELLOW NAMED WRIGHT. 
 
 There once was a fellow named Wright, 
 Who faithfully promised he'd write, 
 But 'twas only a stall, 
 For Wright wrote not at all. 
 NoAv I reall}' don't think Wright did right. 
 
 THE FELLOW NAMED HERMAN. 
 
 There once was a fellow named Herman, 
 
 Whose war talk was alwaj's pro German. 
 
 Till he made all the people, 
 
 From basement to steeple 
 
 Sore. And now he vieAvs war a la Sherman. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 THE JOLLY OLD SAILOR. 
 
 There once was a jolly old sailor. 
 Who sailed all his life on a whaler. 
 
 But he gave up that life 
 
 For his dear little wife, 
 And he says now she acts like a jailer. 
 
 You need not expect to get ahead unless you use 
 the one you've got. 
 
 In some men all the osseous matter seems to be 
 at the top of the spine. 
 
 If you do your thinking with your mouth, don't 
 blame some one else for telling your secrets. 
 
 The man who keeps a grip on himself, will proba- 
 bly have use for a trunk after a while. 
 
 If you have never known the joy of giving, you 
 have missed one of the greatest joys of living. 
 
 The reason some people love limburger may be 
 because the cheese itself is very scent-imental. 
 
 It is probable that a good deal of the sickness 
 now prevalent is a result of being exposed to the 
 draft. 
 
 When you tell a busy man you are waiting for 
 something to turn up, you need wait no longer, — 
 just watch his nose. 
 
 You think you've been doing your best, but 
 if you have never had a good scare thrown into 
 you, you haven't got started yet. 
 
 There are various ways to get into trouble, but 
 the man with booze inside, and a buzz wagon 
 outside, is making a mighty big bid. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 PRAYER. 
 
 Lord, lead me by the hand I pray, not in mine own, 
 
 but in Thy way. 
 Let Thy lamp guide my wearj^ feet, let Thy voice 
 
 be my music sweet. 
 Lord let Thy Spirit be my guide, while life shall 
 
 last whate'er betide. 
 Do Thou sustain me by Thy grace, until in Heaven 
 
 I see Thy face. 
 
 There's many a slip twixt the cop and the tip. 
 
 A bad law is one which you are caught violating. 
 
 An angry enemy is easier to face than an injured 
 friend. 
 
 Calling a man a sucker is oft 'times a slam on 
 a pretty poor fish. 
 
 No, the crank on the front of your Flivver is 
 not the only auto crank. 
 
 A sober man may make a fool of himself, a 
 drunk one has already done so. 
 
 The minds of some men would be improved by a 
 call from the city garbage wagon. 
 
 The eighth Avonder of the world. — the man who 
 admits he is to blame for an accident. 
 
 Some men take pride in not driving recklessly; 
 others in not having to pay a fine for it. 
 
 Often when you say you are doing your best, it 
 looks as though you were doing your worst. 
 
 Men have the world, the flesh, and the Devil to 
 contend with; women have all the foregoing, with 
 the men thrown in for good measure. 
 
COGITATIONS 
 
 Social success is often spiritual suicide. 
 Being over anxious frequently makes a man un- 
 der honest. 
 
 In the game of life, as in a ball game, the sacri- 
 fices cut a big figure. 
 
 It's a hard job to get sentiment and common 
 sense to travel together. 
 
 That life is misdirected, whose hopes are not 
 dearer than its memories. 
 
 Intelligence will grant you a hearing, when igno- 
 rance slams the door in your face. 
 
 It's not the appearance of cars, but their dis- 
 appearance that worries the police. 
 
 A good many of the people who are knocked 
 senseless, only recover consciousness. 
 
 The trouble with a great many people seems to 
 be tire trouble. Thej^'re born with it. 
 
 Don't be too much impressed by lofty flights, 
 the Buzzard soars as high as the Eagle. 
 
 It takes both grip and grit to shin up a pole, 
 but you can drop to the bottom without either. 
 
 There are a good many ways, but from behind 
 a typewriter seems to be about the safest place 
 from which to take a shot at the kaiser. 
 
 "Say," a man said to a policeman the other 
 day, "did you see what an awful look that woman 
 gave me?" 
 
 "Well," replied the officer, after giving the man 
 the once over, "you certainly have an awful look, 
 but I don't believe that woman ever gave it to 
 you. ' ' 
 
r-l'S-JllllHr °^ F°NGRESS 
 
 018 602 349