» >>; gt IIP S3? » £3* OD i smut >> :».» > s> >>> " > > " 1^ i LIBRARY OF CONGRESS, I :»> 3 3 3 ^1 m*% £4$ f UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. ^ ^?«?-S>» ■>»- > 5> > 5 "7- 3 .->:> > ■■»> > g> > > » » >^3»>> » >i >:> s> -< KTlNTERESTING PUBLICATION ! AN EXPOSITION OF DR. COBB'S ART OF DISCOVERING THE Faculties of the Humin Mind AND BODILY INFIRMITIES; TO WHICH IS ADDED AX £ YiC 5" ^€>b Auto-Biographical Sketch of the Author and a Poetic Description of scosral Cities, Towns and Villages which he has visited ; TO WHICH IS ALSO ADDED, A Guide for teaching his Art to other s t explaining the use of his "Marked Strap" with a Blank Ciart, in / which a Description of any person may be inserted.,, [fcj- An interesting Song on an eminent Lawyer ! !] MONTPELIER: 1846. Entered according to an Act of Congress in the year 1846,% ENOS COBB, in the Clerk'* office of the District Court for the District •f Vermont, ; PREFACE. Perhaps there is no science ever yet known, or ever can be known, which can he of more value to the world of mankind than the science of the human mind and the human system. Upon this subject philosophers have been speculating for ages, and forming theories, without illustrating their theories by reducing them to practice — been building caslles in the air, and before they have got them well finished they are blown away by the wind. It is well known of the author of this work that he never builds theories — that he will first know the practical utility of a science before he will attempt to theorize upon the subject. — The science of the human mind and human sys- tem occupied his attention in his youthful days; and his situation in life, (as will be seen by his Biography,) was such as to enable him to have recourse to all the theories, upon any subject, that had ever emanated from the craniums of the wise and learned, ever since the world began. "Lav- arter on Physiognomy," was among the first works on the human mind that interested his attention. He studied it through carefully, then began to make applications among his school mates. Thea "Pailey on the Mind," "Locke on the Under- standing," "Cullen on the First Principles of Philosophy," "Bell on Anatomy," and several Works on Physiology; and all the host of learned writers interested his attention in his school-boy hours. But he thought to himself, that all these learned men's theories would be of little use unless their theories could be applied in practice. Upon this course of thinking he did not ponder long be- fore he began examinations among his school- mates — telling them whether they would be good doctors, lawyers, ministers, sailors, soldiers, me- chanics, &.c. In his examinations he would pay very strict attention to the form of their hands and fingers, the shape and regularity of the features, &c, &c. When he had become more ripened in years, he was induced [from the scurrilous remarks of gos- sips] to believe this examination business to be mere boy's play; therefore, while engaged in other pursuits he let the favorite acquirement of his youth sii>k into forget fulness for some years; then, while in the practice of painting human likeness- es, the science of the human mind and human sys- tem somewhat revived, and interested his atten- tion; but to attempt to make public his ideas, which were not generally known, he concluded wculd have a tendency to bring down upon him more ridicule than profit. Bui, all at once, the science of Phrenology burst in from Germany to astonish the world! Dr. Gaul, of Germany, had discovered an Ar;, by which the knowledge ©f V. every man, woman and chil 1, as well as the cat and do*, could be known by examining the bumps on the head — ,\u(\ any person of learning must be decried as a "thick skull" who should intimate that he did not believe every word of Dr. Gaul's theory. Phrenology has taken a gre?»t run, and has now probably arrived to its summit. Hun- dreds of speculating quacks have made much money by lecturing upon the subject. While it has always been called a science, but in fact it is only a part of a. science — only secondary to the science of the human mind, while Physiognomy, Physiology and Anatomy form the primary. It will be seen, by this work, that the author, in his examinations, blends Physiognomy, Physiology and Anatomy together, and uses common Phre- nology merely as secondary. By this he deter- mines, on principles that cannot be disputed, con- cerning the natural faculties of the mind and of the bodily infirmities — what they are at the time of examining, or what they are liable to be in fu- ture. Each person is bom into the world subject to some natural bodily infirmity, as well as being endowed with certain faculties of mind; and all these can be correctly ascertained by examining, according to the directions here laid down. In regard to the utility of this science, it may be ob- served that every person having a family should take the advantage of having the children exam- ined, in order to know what course in life they ought to pursue. This science is easily taught, and ought to be taught in schools as a common branch of education. Anto Biographical Sketch of Enos Cobb, Styled, Dr. Cobb — Poet Laureate. He is the oldest son of Thomas Cobb, who serv- ed his countrv in arms during the revolutionary war, a volunteer soldier. He himself was a vol- unteer in the last war with England, and served as 2d sergeant 1st Company and 3d Regiment of Massachusetts Minuie Guards, stationed at Bos- ton; was the youngest officer in the corps. He was born in the town of Camden, a port of entry on the west side of the Penobscot Bay, in Maine, and went to Boston in the early part of the war. Previous to his going to Boston he had been an apprentice boy, with an expectation of learning a trade of a carpenter and joiner; was found to pos- sess too feeble constitution to enable him to gain his subsistence by manual labor. He relinquish- ed his apprenticeship, after serving eighteen months, during which time he had learned the use of mechanical tools to such a degree that he could make and construct gun-stock*, fiddles, &c. He acquired an early education in his native town, under the tuition of three learned gentlemen; one was an eminent lawyer, another an eminent doctor, and the other was a merchant, who gradu- ated at Litchfield Univeisiry in England, and was Controller of "The Navigation Company Store, 19 in Camden, in which ''Master Enos, "(as they called him,) was clerk. He attended to the in- structions of these gentlemen, sometimes one and sometimes another, mostly evenings, after his bu- siness hours had closed. He entered a school kept by the parson of the parish, who taught Grammar, Arithmetic, &c, by the quarter. Be- fore his quarter was half out he had learned all the minister knew, who was glad to give him a recommendation to get clear of him. He learned something of the Jlrt of law^ by being frequently by the side of this "eminent lawyer" before men- tioned, when he was managingsome difficult cases before a court. He acquired some knowledge of medicine and surgery by being frequently in com- pany with the '-eminent Doctor" before mention- ed, while he was in the exercise of his profession- al duties; and his mercantile education he acquir- ed by his daily business as clerk. "Boxing the words around" with a goose quill, is a business he became acquainted with in his early days. When the war closed, he entered into mercan- tile business in Boston, under patronage. His patrons failed and he was broken up, with a loss of all the property he had acquired, and making him bankrupt for some thousands of dollars. He was then appointed traveling agent for "The Ply- mouth Beach Lottery Company." and remained in that business until their charter ran out. He then constructed an Illustrator to teach English syntax, which he called "The Grammatical Expositor." He carried it to Albany city, and commenced lec- turing on the "Beauties of Education," Grammar and Rhetoric, Transposition of Poetry, and the like. He was furnished with a room in the State House, and had the public recommendations of several of the most respectable gentlemen in the city. He was taken sick and compelled to leave for New England. He stopped in Connecticut about two years, and followed the business of lec- turing to select classes of ladies and gentlemen in various parts of the State. His health began to fail from over exercise in his labors, and he re- turned home to Boston and published his ays- 8 tern, then established a weekly paper entitled "The Boston ExpoMtor and Philanthropist," of which he was editoi and publisher, hi his paper he advocated a citv government. He is the per- son who made the motion for a city government, in Concert Hall, sometime in the year 1822. Af- ter being engaged in an animated debate against the opposers for some time, the question was tak- en by counting, and carried in favor, and the city of Boston was established from his motion. He is author of the following Works, which were before the public previous to his coming to Vermont. "Elements of the English Language," "Self Explaining Grammar of the English Lan- guage,' 5 "Writer's Guide," and "Writer's Chart," "Fame and Fancy," 2 vols. 12 plates;" also sev- eral pamphlets. He is author of a medical Work, (now in manuscript,) 500 pages octavo, describ- ing the several diseases and disorders incident to the human family — the mode of practice in each case — the mode of compounding medicines to be used in any case — a guide to bone-setting, in diffi- cult cases — a mode of examining to ascertain any disease, its foundation, magnitude, &.c. Previous to his coming to Vermont he had been engaged in reporting trials in the Boston courts, and executing written Instruments of various kinds. His name is in the Boston Register of 1824 as "scrivener." During the last few years, while in Boston, he was part of the time associat- ed among physicians, and part of the time among gentlemen of the Bar. His health failed him, and he took up a country life, as a traveling Physician, and mended his health — was two years engaged in his native State in the business of making papers and obtaining evidence to substantiate claims on the United States government for pensions, &c, was instructed by the Secretary of War and com- missioned by *be District Judge. Thnt business expired in 1830, by an allegation of the law. He has been in Vermont about fourteen years, during which time he bus been called in practice? of med- icine and surgery in more than two thousand cases — has been employed as special deputy and subpoena officer in Caledonia County one year, while attending to his duties as a physician. He has attended at the Vermont Legislature every session foe the last tour years — has employed most of his time while there in lecturing on the Human Mind and Human System, and in writing and publishing in prose and verse. At this last session he was often called before committees to give his sentiments in regard to acts pending before the legislature, and received, as a remuneration for his services, a vote of thanks from the members of the House of Representatives, with the privi- lege of a seat at the right hand of the Speaker, as an extra member.* After many years' fatigue in country practice, in the month of May, 1341, he came into Burling- ton, Vt., with an intention to relinquish practice in his profession, and to publish his medical work before mentioned. This was at a time when the erysipelas was spreading to an alarming degree, and four of the principal doctors of Burlington were down sick with the malady. As soon as he had published a Prospectus for his medical work, he was called into practice, was very successful in relieving patients of the malady, and although a stranger among them, was made a slave in his profession, being continually called by all classes of community. Many called, but few paid. Af- ter following this slavish business ai>out three years, he was compelled to relinquish his station as a practicing physician in Burlington on account of his poverty and depreciated state of his health, both of which had been brought upon him by the [*fcrTliree chcera will starve a cat!] 10 ungrateful usage of those whom he had exposed himself nights and days to serve, and by the influ- ence of some of the leading men in the town. The other doctors recovered from their sickness, after a while, and resumed their former cruses among their old patients, after the rage of the malady had been subdued by "the stranger," (as they called him,) "who ought not to be trusted!" He then at- tempted to collect his debts, and soon found that not one in ten ot those whom he had served were persons of whom he could collect a farthing; and many of them were town paupers, unbeknown to him as such, when he attended upon them. By this operation he had divested himself of a supply of valuable medicine, of his own preparing, which he had brought into the town with him; and could not collect among his patients the means of pur- chasing the materials to manufacture a new sup- ply. The erysipelas is a disorder with which he had made himself acquainted several years before, while in practice in his native State; and by giving very ready relief, he had saved the town many hundreds of dollars of expense by getting poor people well and able to maintain themselves and families by their labor. Taking all these circum- stances into view, by the advice of his friends he petitioned to the town for an indemnity for his loss in doctoring the poor people of the town. His petition was opposed by some of the richest gen- tlemen among thern, one of whom, (**he town clerk,) said, in the town house, li he is entitled to no reward J or curing them. If he had killed them off he would have rendered the town a service!" Since relinquishing his station as a practicing physician, he bas traveled much, visited Legisla- tures, Colleges, Courts, Manufacturing Establish- ments, &c., followed writing and publishing, in prose and verse, and occasionally making out pa- II pers to substantiate claims on the United States Government for individuals who have applied to him. During the last year he has been absent from home about eight months, in the cities of Albany and Troy, and elsewhere, and 8 pari from his writing business, he has been engaged in bring- ing into notice his improved system of discovering the Faculties of the Human Mind and Bodily In- firmities, &c. While in Albany, he became ac- quainted with "The Albany Young Men's Associ- ation," an Institution of great celebrity — having many hundred members, the most respectable gentlemen in the community. The following ex- tract from his Address, delivered before their ex- ecutive committee, explains his title as Poet Lau- reate : "I have here availed myself of the privilege of presenting you with a copy of Mr. Adams' Geolo- gical survey of Vermont. Also, with a few sheets of my own productions, such as 1 have been in the practice of amusing the public with, during the last few years. By these you will perceive that I am styled "Poet Laureate." This title was given to me by a unanimous vote of the members of the Vermont University, in committee of the whole, on the 6th day of March, 1843, and published by a committee chosen in that assembly, in a Burling- ton paper, edited by Mr. James 0'Haleran,a grad- uate from said University, on the 15th day of said March. I have adopted the title as a token of re- spect to the University. It is merely an honorary title — no emoluments arising from it. As I define the title, it means, a poet authorised ami sanction- ed to write on various subjects and on various oc- casions, having public approbation. In monarch- ical governments poets are crowned. When a poet pleases the monarch he allows him to be crowned Poet Laureate. In a free government the monarch is the concentrated will of the people. By this concentrated will, universities are estab- 12 iished. The members or the Vermont University gave me the titta by a vore; their voting was the crowning. John Kay Was the first poet crowned in England: he was crowned Poet Laureate to Edward IV. If 1 should be found right in my analysis of the title, the members of the Vermont University have done me the honor to crown mo the first Poet Laureate to my countrymen, the A- merican People." Extract from Major Jack Bowning's Let- ter to ills Aunt Peggy. Well, Aunt Peggy! Here I am in snug winter quarters! — up here in the Capitol of the Green Mountain State, as happy as a king and as honest as a deacon. Got out ot business and called on the Poet Laureate to learn me to make songs. I have just got one made, and thought I would send it to you. 1 wish you would tell cousin Sukey to sing it to all the folks there in Downingsville, so that they may know mat I am alive! Note. — The song may be sung to the air, "It's my delight in a shiny night, in the season of the year!" — and the Digression to the air "Wreaths for the chieftain," in the close. Going to Quebec is a pleasant voyage! As by m> song you will see — A Lawyer has tried it over the surge, And very much pleased was he! A lawyer he is of great renown, As the people all do say, He carrred a Lady from our town, To comfort him on the way ! 18 Pleasant pass'd his floeting hours, Among the Canada herbs and (lowers. There's nothing hah" so sweet in life -as Lady'f charming smiles! When this Lawyer us'd to preach, The people he led by the nose, Bible Doctrines he tri'd to teach, But his preaching they did oppose! He from the pulpit was sent adrift, Which made his face look long and wry! His business he was compell'd to shift, And with the glooms he had lik'd to die! Then dismal was his passing hours, — Had no delight among herbs and flowers — - No charms then had he for the comfort of his soul f Now, Abolition he did defend — He travel'd, preaeh'd and pray'd; Did Temperance with abolition blend, And many converts madet Him the ladies were pleas'd to see, And thought him no deceptive skunk — They took him a sober man to be; But they found he would get drunk! Now dark and gloomy were his hours — - He had no Canada herbs and flowers; Nor the charms of a lady his spirits for to raise ! Now to a lady he did write, And his secrets she did keep! He did his mind with hers unite. And oft with her did sleep! By his children his letters were found, Which struck them all with awe, And the story they told all round That they had a mother-in-law! He has now got in a pretty muss, And with his wife must have a fuss. O! the charms of the Lady his heart they beguil'd ! 14 This lawyer, you must know, one day. While with his friends was parting, Was going abroad some money to pay, Some brandy drank on starting — Brandy he drank! O, that's the talk! And was boozy on the way — He did not drink — only smelt the cork? As many people do say ! The Lady's charms he did forget, And, drinking more, he was drunker yet! And soon to Noddle's Island this lawyer was found? Two companions he had took to ride, And the bottle they had tipp'd around! And in their friendship he did confide, And soon dead drunk was found! His companions, sly chaps, you know, Him they robb'd and plundered! They take his money and off they go, Of dollars more than three hundred! When to his sense* he had come, He thought he had drank of poison'd rum! And sadly wassurpriz'd when his money he found was gone ! Now, of this lawyer no more I'll tell — He got all his money they do say — His Lady I hope will love him well. The robbers got b«il and run away! For past offences he can make amends, And have this subject stifl'd here! Justice do to his injur'd friends, And nothing further shall appear. Then pleasant ma) pass his fleeting hours Among the Canada herbs and flowers, When there's nothing half so sweet in life as the Lady's charming smiles! General Remarks. The larger the portion of the head there is above the frog of the ear, the larger the quantity of intellectual talents. The wider the eyes are set apart, the greater are the discriminating faculties. If the eyes set deep back in the head and still wide apart, discriminating faculties and a power of deep calculation are combined. The greater the distance frcm the top of the nose to the peak of the forehead, the greater the memory on things of importance. The more sudden the falling off from the forehead to the nose, the more treacher- ous the memory on names, numbers, dates, dis- tances, and all affairs of small consequence. The more regular and upright the side of the head from the ear to the crown, the greater prudence and caution. The greater depth over the head from the nose to the upper part of thj* neck, the great* er firmness, perseverance and determined resolu- tion. If the distance from the frog of the ear is greater than from the centre of the upper lip to the frog of the ear, logical powers overbalance persuasive faculties. The greater the distance from the frog of the ear to the corner of the eye, the greater the deceptive faculties. The larger tht swell back of the ear and the cord connected with the swell, the larger the courage and com- bative powers. If the swell back of the ear be large, and the cord small, it denotes great power of combating in argument, but a want of power to combat with bodily strength. The power of acquiring education is denoted by long, slim fin- gers, blunt at the ends, regular between joints, hands long and slim, both of a size, high forehead, the size of the head over the brain very prominent, 16 and lively, piercing eyes, set at a distance apart* If the forehead juts over with prominent front, a power of calculation in mathematics accompanies the power of acquiring education. Mechanical powers are denoted by prominent ridges on the sides of the head. The nearer these ridges are to the back part of the head, the greater the mechan- ical powers. Generosity and Benevolence are represented by the frog of the ear being large, the ear being large and thick, and standing out well from the head. Kindness and friendship are rep- resented by a prominency over the back part of the brain, and the ears being as before described. A frolicksome, mischievous disposition is represent- ed by a connecting together of the eyebrows over the nose. A covetous, miserly disposition is rep- resented by thin ears, set in close to the head, with the frog very small and thin, thin lips, and mouth hanging down at the corners. A thievish disposi- tion is represented by narrow ears, griping in close at the bottom or towards the lower part, a low forehead, head flat on the top, and a downward look with the eyes. Taste for the beautiful and sublime in nature and in art, is represented by a quick, active glance of the eyes. Poetic talents is represented by a hollow place between the two eye brows, or immediately over the nose. Love of the opposite sex is |a phrenological discovery, which happens to be/partly correct. When two prominent lumps are /found just over the neck joint, they denote that the person has a fondness for the other sex, accompanied with kind, friend- ly feelings. If there is a swell in the neck be- tween these prominent lumps, it denotes a strong propensity to mingle with the other sex without this kindness of feeling. A prominent lump a lit- tle above the othei prominences, denotes a love for children; a little above that, there is another prominent lump, which denotes a loving kindness Towards parents and friends. Notje. — Quack 17 Phrenologists make a great parade about "Ami- tiveness," as they call it, as if that pari of the ♦•x- amination must be of some great consequence, when, in fa.-t, the amorous propensities do not vary more than one degree, upon an average, through all the generations of men and women, ami they may he increased or decreased by habit. Veneration, lo"e of God and divine things, is rep- resented by a prominency between Hn* two peak* of the forehead. Haughty pride is represented by a t»perin: off of the forehead, and being very high at the back part of the head. A sly, roguish, deceitful and cruel disposition is represented by a low, narrow forehead, and the ete coveiers com- ing down over the upper part of the eye-ball. \ low, contracted, conniving disposition is represent- ed by the eyes being placed \^ry near the nose — the nose being long and crooked, chin projecting out, rather peaked and thin ears and thin lips, as before described. Sensitiveness and a quick, flashy temper, are represented bv a delicate, femi- nine form, hands and feet small and regularly formed, countenance open AHd lively, and eves brilliant and sparkling. A sullen, ugly temper is represented by heavy, inactive eyes, a stiff, solid countenance, and a rawuey, masculine form, bands and feet large and irregularly formed. — True courage, and greatness of mind and talents, are represented by a broad, high forehead, full, brilliant eyes, body broad across the shoulders, hands and fVet regular y formed, not too long nor too small in proportion ro the size of the body, and ears as described in Generosity and Benevo- lence. Secreti veuess is represented by a promi- nency just over the back part of the ear. When the forehead is very straight up and down it de- notes a desire to know the whys and wherefores, and not being willing to believe without evidence. 2 The Author's Analysis of the Human Mind and System, With Directions for Examining. First learn the " Marked Strap;!! No. 1 on the Strap means the distance from the upper part of the nose to the peak of the forehead, to determine the degree of memory. No. 2, means the distance across from the outside of the eyes, to determine the degree of discriminating faculties. No. 3, the distance from the centre of the upper lip to the frog of the ear, to determine the degree of persua- sive faculties. No. 4, the distance from the frog of the ear to the top of the head, to determine the degree of logical power?. No. 5, the distance around the head, and over it, to determine the gen- eral powers of the mind. No. 6, the distance from the upper part of the nose, over to thn upper part of the neck joint, to determine the degree of firm- ness and perse verence. No. 7, the di>tanee from the frog of the ear to the corner of the eye, to de- termine the degree of deceptive faculties. The degree'" are from nothing to 7; 7 being the highest, and 4 the medium, is represented hy the long mark across the strap. After learning the Marked Strap, commit to memory all the General Remarks. Then learn to examine for the infirmi- ties. The more equally proportioned the size of the bone, the muscles, and fle>h on the arms, the more free will the person be Irom natural bodily infirmities. The infirmities natural to the human system, the author has >een fit to class as follows: Bilious, Nervous, Chronic, Dropsical, and Asth- metic. All bilious disorders arise from an affec- tion of the liver. When the liver is affected, a 19 pult will beat in the artery in the lower part of the wrist, called Ulnar, and the pult in the artery in the upper part of the wrist, called Radial, will beat irregular, sometimes fast and some times slow. VVhen there is a chronic disease attending the bil- ious, the muscles in the wrist will feel tight.—- When there is a nervous affection of the system, the muscles in the wrist are trembling, and the pult beats fluttering. When the disease is drop- sical, the pult beats slow, and the muscles are all slack. Asthmeiic disease is known by the neck of the person being short, and being formed short be- tween joints. A stout, robust constitution is represented by the body being flat, wide across the shoulders, and rounding, long arms, large hands and feet, and a long neck. A weak, slender constitution is repre- resented by a round, straight body, short arms, small hands and feet, and a short neck. Analysis of describing the Faculties of the Mind and natural Infirinilies oj the Body. Courage, (degree,) No. 12 3 4 5 6 7 Combativeness, 12 3 4 5 6 7 Caution and Prudence, 12 3 4 5 6 7 Deceptive Faculties, 12 3 4 5 6 7 Discernment and Discrimin- ating Faculties, 1 2 3 4 £ 6 7 20 Logical Powers, 12 3 4 5 6 7 Persuasive faculties, 12 3 4 5 6 7 Mechanical power?, 12 3 4 5 6 7 Memory on things of Irnor- tance, 12 3 4 5 6 7 Memory of numbers, dates, distances, &c, 12 8 4 5 6 7 Power of acquiring educa- tion, 12 3 4 5 6 7 Veneration— love of God and Divine things, 12 3 4 5 6 7 Benevolence and generosity, 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 Kindness and friendship, 12 3 4 5 6 7 Love of the other iex, with kindly feelings, 12 3 4 5 6 7 SI Licentious propensities to min- gle with the othor sex with- out kindness of feeling 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 Firmness and perseverance, 12 3 4 5 6 7 Love of children, 12 3 4 5 6 7 Love of parents, 12 3 4 5 6 7 Disgust, 12 3 4 5 6 7 Love of food, 12 3 4 5 6 7 Pecuniary propensities, 12 3 4 5 6 7 Poetic talents, 12 3 4 5 6 7 Propensity to know the whys and wherefores, and not to believe without evidence, 12 3 4 5 6 7 Taste for the sublime and beautiful in uature and in art, 12 3 4 5 6 7 23 Pride, 1 2 3 4 5 6 T Sensitiveness, being easily disturbed and put out of humour, 1 2 $ 4 b 6 7 Temper, Bodily Infirmities, Examination made at day of 184 A Poetic Description of Several Cities, Towns and Villages. Camden, by the side of Penobscot bay, A beautiful town, as all travelers say; The harbor is the best anchoring ground, That anywhere in the world can be found. Camden mountain you can always see, When at a great distance off at sea; That place the British view'd with awe, Where a cannon was mounted in time of war. Next to Camden is Thomastown, A lime-burning place ot much renown; The States prison in that town jou know, io if you are a Rogue, you there must go. 25 Augusta, the Capitol of the State, A large city, has become of late — That lies uii Ken ne beck river side, A short distance above the tide. Boston, you know from days of yore, Has increased In numbers several score. There you can :*ee wealth, beauty and pleasure, And a splendid city, rich with treasure — The Capital of Old Massachusetts pioper, VVhere Politicians jump into the hopper. Boston for wealth and situation, Excels any ether city in our nation. Albany, the Capital City of New York, Of whom so many are heard to talk; is a large flourishing business place, And their gambling houses aie a disgrrpe. — The "Albany Young Ajen's Association" i there. With which no other Institution can compare! The city of New York, the author visited twice, Saw many ladies there very neat and nice, And gentlemen too, .who to him were kind, As often elsewhere, he did always find. This is a large, wealthy, spacious city, With citizens of all kinds, both foolish and witty. He stop'd for a while, in Portland Maine, And, by his profession did some property gain; And after some time he there had passed, Unluckily he was burnt out at last. Portland travelers may always know, By "Dearing's Ridge and Huckler's Row!" Tror is a business place of great repute, That it is a fine city, there is no dispute, — There they have a Hail Road, the people to annoy, Passing through the centre of East Troy. 24 The town of YVpetport, in New York State, Quite a business place has become of late, Tiiere they have Doctors and Lawyers, and a Primer too, As wHI as merchants and traders, not a few — And J lekson's new Blast Foundery, with lots of hands, Where the company much business commands, Pittsburgh, on the ,vest of Lake Champlain, Is a town where much business is done. There the British did bitterly complain, When finding ihe yankees a victory had won. Concord New Hampshire, Is a shire town, Where they can shop up a rogue or a clown; It is the Capital tt»o, where law makers convene, And where horse jockies in throngs are often seen, Isaac Hill to Congress went from there, Made Democratic speeches very fair. Dover &. Somersworth are manufacturing towns Where they employ girls, bright men and clowns. Lowell is the Birmingham of our nation, As a business place holds a high Nation — It i» throng'd with the ingenious, learned and wise, They have people there of every sort and size. Of Whitehall I something will here tell, It is the out-let of the Troy Canal, — Many merchants and traders do business there, Who in their dealings are honest and fair; They have Printers there the news to tell, Who are dealing fair and doing well, They have good taverns to entertain, Of whose tare very few complain. Portsmouth, New Hampshire, is a place for fishes, In Woodbury Vermon* they make wooden dishes; 25 In Portsmouth, old what ye call him, "ate eats for coons," In Attlehury ihey make bastard jewelry and pew- ter spoons. In the Lynn marshes they shoot birds on the wing, In Randolph rhey catch patndges with a spring. In Newark New .levsvy the sand is red as brick In Waldaborough [Maine] the mud is black and thick. To St. Johns the author went one day, His respects to the Canadians to pay, There British soldiers were quite a throng, And among them he could not tarry long! Their soldiers were deserting from their ranks, And some yankees were there cuiting pranks, Of the author they had suspicion, That he was engaged in sedition; Him they tri'd and tri'd all in vain, To confine in prison and him retain, The officers were after him, as some do say, But he made his escape and got away. In Orange town they raise peaches and plumbs; From Ryegate the best of beef and pork comes; In Newbury they sell hay by the ton; Trouting in Groton is nice, pretty fun; In WeatnershVId they weed onions on their knees: In Beverly they raise good beans and peas; From Epping lots of horse-jockies come; In Newhurvpcrt they make rectified rum; In Andover they youug ladies and gentlemen teach; In Brunswick, (Maine,) they teach men to preach; In Wiscassett they have a very strong jail, And many vessels from that port do sad; Topsham is a splendid Green Mountain town, Where they make a gentleman of a clown, In Shelburne they make steamboats, And raise the be»t of peas and oats; St. George is a little town out in the woods; 26 In Burlington the inhabitants buy their goods, In Hinesburgh there is much business done; Of respectable towns Huntington is one; Chelsea is the shire town of Orange County; And for Bumpers of courts should have a bounty; In Danville they have a court house and jail; A bank, too, and merchant* who seldom fail; In St. Johnshury they make patent scales; In Lowell they make the best of nails; Hartford, Connecticut, is a city of renown; Norwich, in that State, is a flourishing town; In Newhaven they have a flourishing College", Where they deal out all kinds of knowledge; In Litchfield, in that State, they have a law school, But they cannot make a lawyer ot'a fool; In Cornwall they have an academy the heathen tt» teach, And learn them how to sing, pray and preach; In Goshen they make the best of eheese 1 ; And in the forest they find lots of bees; In Pom fret the old woh's den is found Where Putnam shot the wolf under ground; In J-feathers tie Id the best of onions are raised, Which everywhere are highly praised; In Charlestovvn, Massachusetts, they had many nuns. Springfield is the place where they make lots o\ guns; In Cambridge is Harvard University, Where they deal out knowledge in great diversity ; This is the oldest college in our nation And always ranks the highest in station. Learning's proud banners are there furled Over the largest library in the world; The celebrated Sargeant graduated there, Whose learning has caused the world to stare; He was rusticated for writing some notes While engaged in ik bushing in his wild oats!"* *He was riding a Jackass with a bush fastened 27 Dartmouth college is at Hanover, you know, W hero students fitr learning by hundreds go; There was Mussey, the greatest surgeon of the age, JFhose name will adorn our history's page; A College at Middlehury in this State They say is last growing in fame of late; The College in Burlington, on a hill, Now takes the lead as a great "knowledge mill!" The president there is a man of fame, For his virtues has an exalted name; The professors, too, are learned and wise, The truth of whieh no one there denies; The students mostly are bright and witty As can he found in any town or city; The graduates here are not neglected; They through the world are mostly respected; A Billings, a Marvin, a Dewey, too, Who for good conduct much respect is due; Benedicks, too, ami others we could name, Who pass in the world with laurels and fame. >own University, in Rhode Island State, or good government does now highly rate; the year eighteen hundred twenty one, )me students, hy way of having some fun, Jome powder placed under the building floor, The quantity a dozen pounds or more, Which they set on fire by means of a train, And caused the good people all to complain. This Mowed up the floor and raised the duce, And for this mischief they had no excuse. On their character this was a damper They had to leave town and run and scamper! Some of them were caught and some ran away; to his tail, and told the College Chaplain that he had sowed all his wild oats and was then bushing them in. 28 This College blow up caused the duce to pay. Of old Burlington, on L k^ (Jhaiiiplain shore, The author now will v\nte a few words more. This is h great flourishing business place, The village in size is gaining apace; Besides the University lutfieed before, They have other establishments halt* a score; They have courts here for trying every cause, A prison to keep those who break the laws; A seminary they have young ladies to tearh, And meeting houses where ministers preach; They also have a Merhnuic Institute — A noble Institution there's no dispute; Glass works they have there, now under full way, Agents good attention to business pay. The "Utile Loco" employed in their store, And the rtdhaiied clerk is making one more; Stone-ware factory to make pans and mugs; Also, covered jars, flower-pots and jugs; An iron foundry where castings aie well done, Down near the lake where many steam boats run; Machine shops, lathes going with steam power, Where lots of work thev run do in ati hour; Roman Catholic church, where members are gain- ing; Respectable priest of whom none are complaining. Respectable taverns I hey have in this ville, With regulations go oil, all quiet and stiJL Now to the celebrated Wiuooski Falls The author his readers their attention calls, There you will Hnd people as busy as bees, All trying their best the public to please; FFoolen factory, an establishment grand. Under care of Mr. Cook who has command; Their specimens of woik are pleasing to the eye, And the people are well suited when there they buy; A new cotton factory they have established there Where goods are well made, all neat and lair; They hive factories there to make combs, chairs ami nail<; They are doing much business and making great Sales. They nuike by machinery axe handles and patent fences: The owners are prosperous in paying their ex- penses. To Montpelier he attention will pay, And something of this plaee attempt to say. Tin* village is on Onion liiver side, Many respectable people here reside; The eapind of th^ Green Mountain State Where Ft. M. Johnson visited of late. The State House is here, a great, splendid dome! But it cannot be seen two m.les from home; It stands uinler a hill on a solid rock; To see this beautiful House people flock; Of writers and printers the news to tell Montpelier village is furnished well! Of fa vet ns here they have great supply, Where you can be served if hungry or dry. A new court house. But a ragged old jail, From which prisoners are compellM to hail. They have stages here for a motley throng, And soon a new rail road coming along. Insurance office. Bank that always pays, And discounts good notes at ninety days. Merchants and mechanics 'here is a host, And of i heir fair dealing they all cat) boast. One merchant among them is quite a wag, Of learning and science he well may brag; With eloquenee he astonishes creation; His voice should be sounded through the nation, Then to Mexico he ought to be sent, Wnere some new orations he would invent; To charm our Armies and frighten the foe Have a mighty influence wherever they go! so Barre from the State House six miles away Is a flourishing town, as people do say, With Stores and taverns and every fine thing, And iron works owned by Joshua Twing; They have good lawyers to plead their eases, Their clients when beat they make wry faces. Windsor is the town where convicts are sent, In the St?te Prison confined till they repent. In Woodstock is a medical college, Where young doctors go to increase their knowl- edge, Vergennes is the only city in the State we find; The citizens are very civil and kind; They have a printing office and bank too; Lawyers, merchants, mechanics not a few. Middlebury is a flourishing inland village, Surrounded with fertile land good for tillage, There they have respectable merchants quite a number, Who deal in manufactured goods, produce and lumber; With the citizens for sobriety and temperance there But few other towns and villages can compare. They have printing offices, factories and mills; Their roads are very good over the hills, Many travelers there go and come, And in their taverns they sell no rum. * # # " * # # In the wars and tumults throughout our land The author has never yet had a hand; The war topic is now going the round. And the war whoop, making an awful sound All parties use it for speculation, And make a great noise all through the nation. In whatever r*ity we chance to go, They talk loud of the war with Mexico. The whigs they all say the war is unjust, And stop it they will, and stop it they rauat, 31 Democrats oppose, say the war is right; And rally all hands to tro on and fight. Third parly men say they no aid will lend: That the war serves slavery to extend; These three parties have now got by the ears, Are pulling oaps all round, as it appears — Make news stock of the subject far and wide: While they expert, in them we will confide; Each his story tell to suit his case best — Quote parts of a statement and leave the rest. Democrats are for war, whigs are for peace; The abolition party with the war to cease. Two parties against one seem to agree, And very much engaged appear to be; Ufa bystander should believe what they write Ke could not know whether to ground arms or ffifht, The Authors Song, Composed on the rising of the Vermont Legisla- ture in November, 1846. Tune, Rory O'More. When the Burlington member his logic did use, The members to hear him did many refuse — Then various diseases among them prevailed, — With hickups and sneezes our ears were assailed! Some had the quinzy , and some had a cough — And some had the diabetis and soon walked off! O, how discontented they all seemed to be — "Such a getting down stairs I never did see!" His speech made a rumpus and caused some touse — A motion was made for a "call of the House !V Tne absentees were scattered — gone to and fro, Where to find them the serjeant was puzzled to know ! Soon in the back yard were sitting on the wall, 32 And some had "cut dust" and heard not the call! They from his eloquence determined to flee, O "such a getting down stairs 1 never did see!" Some were eating ginger-bread, some eatin« cake, Some drinking gi?i slin$ to keep them awake. Anything at all to keep them away From hearing what the spoufer was having to say! The House was most briliant all splendid and light, And then it was coming very late in the night — The hoys were impatient Tor having a "spree!" "such a getting down stairs 1 never did see! In burring off business they got along well — Voted "no!" to the bills as loud as they could yell! With rail roads and banks they cut a fine dash, And the bank men were eager to pocket the cash! With locomotives in heads, rail road men spoke, If the boiler had burs ted it had been a joke! They dropped all in the night, and got off before day- Had they stay'd till morning the due'd been to pay 1 They scampered and run as if stung by a bee — O "such a getting down stairs I never did see!" Herring Factory. — In describing t'o*wns, one town vvas left out; That but lately was known anything about; Herring they make out of perch in the factory there; There work is done in nice, style very fair; This place is much noted for home made goods; It is the town of Woodbury 'way up in the woods. The Author now here this work will close, And no more of Poetry will compose; Come all ye good unties thioughout the land! In aiding the Author now lend a hand! Play off some of your wit upon his name! 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