fro iUjJ A BIT OF SCANDAL A PLAY IN TWO ACTS For Female Characters By FANNIE BARNETT LINSKY Price 35 Cents PUBLISHED BY ELDRIDGE ENTERTAINMENT HOUSE FRANKLIN, OHIO Also DENVER, COLORADO 944 So. Logan Some Bright New Christmas Material First Aid to Santa By Ethel Sexton. A mighty bright playlet for 3 boys, 2 girls and 10 acting dolls (girls and boys). Piays 30 or 40 minutes. Price, 25c. The Christmas Chain By Lillian Pearson. A pretty sketch for 14 or more children. The Christmas Angel shows her complete Christmas Chain to two selfish sisters with happy re- sults. Plays about 20 minutes. Price 25c. How the Christmas Song Was Found By Lillian Pearson. A simple, but beautiful sketch for any number of children, 12 required. Shows the real spirit of Christmas and tells how the glad Christmas song was found. Time, 20 to 30 minutes. For day schools or church entertainments. Price 25c. Mr. Richey Changes His Mind By Lee Owen Snook. Story of a crabbed, wealthy employer and how at Christmas time the memory of his mother changed his attitude toward his employes from that of a "driver" to a considerate comrade. An unexpected romance develops. 4 males, 4 females, and others, either high school or adults. Plays about 20 minutes. Price, 25c. The Little Stranger A moving picture Christmas play, by Edna Randolph Worrell. This is really a pantomime, the different scenes being either announced or shown on screen by stereopticon. 4 scenes "The Night Before Christ- mas Home of Orphan Children," "The Little Stran- ger at the Door," "The Little Stranger Entertains," "Christmas Morning." A pretty entertainment for any number of children. Plays about 30 minutes. 25c. Ten Good Christmas Pantomimes By Ethel Eldridge. A collection that will add novelty and effectiveness to your program. Specific direc- tions for pantomiming some well-known hymns, songs and recitations — "Silent Night," ."Little Town of Bethlehem," "When Good Old Kris Comes 'Round," "Favorite Carols," etc. Contains the music also. 40c. Eldridge Entertainment House FRANKLIN, OHIO also DENVER, COLO. 944 S. Logan St. — A Bit of Scandal A PLAY IN TWO ACTS FOR FEMALE CHARACTERS iiiiiimiiiiiiMiiiHiiiiiMiiiiminiiiiii 1SY FANNIE BARNETT LINSKY Price 35 Cents Copyright, 1021, by Eldridge Entertainment House DEC 19 1921 Published by Eldridge Entertainment House FRANKLIN, OHIO ALSO DENVER, COLORADO 944 So. Logan &■*■* 1^5 CAST OF CHARACTERS IN THE ORDER IN WHICH THEY APPEAR GRACE HART ] JEAN LEWIS j room-mates I Students at NAN BARRETT { I Briar View College FRANCINA DEVOTO for Women. MARY SHERMAN J MISS OGILVIE — Dean of the College. Commonly known as "The Ogre." MRS. DEVOTO— Francina's- mother. CORA, the Maid — (If desired, may be played by person who plays part of "The Ogre.") MRS. SHERMAN-WHEELER— Mary's mother. (If desired, may be played by person who plays Mrs. DeVoto.) CI.Q 594 L& •m r SYNOPSIS. ACT I. Scene 1. Library and social room of Briar View College. Early December. Scene 2. Same. (Curtain lowered for moment to denote passing of time.) ACT IT. The garden of Grace's home. The following 1 summer. REMARKS. COSTUMES. The costumes may be the ordinary dress of today. In the first act the girls wear dresses such as any college students would wear in the winter season. In Act II the regulation dress for summer. "The Ogre" — prim and old-maidish — a typical "school- ma'am," should dress to accentuate her character. Mrs. DeVoto and Mrs. Sherman-Wheeler should dress in modern up-to-date garments. Cora, the maid — conventional costume for maid — i. e., black, neat fitting dress, white collar and cuffs, white apron. CHARACTERS. "The Ogre" to talk with an accent very punctilious and correct. Mrs. DeVoto to have very slight Italian accent. Mary and Mrs. Sherman-Wheeler to have noticeable "South- ern Drawl" in their speech. A Bit of Scandal ACT I SCENE I. Library and social room of the college. Tabic at />'. Fire- place with mantel shelf above, k. front. Small vase on shelf. Window in back trail. Book case against trail near ivindow. Duplicate of rase on mantel standing on book case. Large encyclopedia on stand near, book case. Violin in case, and wi/re music stand in R. corner. Several chairs. Books scattered about on tabic. Victrola conveniently placed. Small statue on pedestal, standing on Victrola. Wmdow scat or utility box covered with cushions placed at convenience. Door at L. near front. Another at back wall R. presumably leading to college grounds amd outdoors. Screen conveniently placed. Three girls seated about tabic in attitudes of study and despair. Occasionally writing busily. Grace — (Stretching out arms with a sigh of relief) Well, thank Goodness I've only got one more paragraph to do on this thing. Oh! I certainly do love to write ten-page compositions. Jean — Well, you can't possibly love it any more than I do. Say, how do you spell "Thermopylae?" Grace — Foolish question number 997. Why ask me when Nan's here. She's the star performer in History, 15. Come on, Nan, are you struck dumb at the compliment? {Shies a book at her.) Wake up, will you, and spell Thermopylae for Joan. Nayi — Shut up, will you, or rather both of you? I'm almost finished with this, -and I'm mightly thankful. (Yawns.) Do you know, it's just been the hardest kind of work for me to keep my mind on this stuff today. I'm simply dying to hear what Francina will have to say about tonight. She promised to conn' in here on her way back from her lesson to tell us the news, 0, 6 A BIT OF SCANDAL hang- it, why did you get me started anyhow. (Turns back to work.) I've just got to finish this pesky thing. (Scribbles madly.) Jean — Well, if no one will spell "Thermopylae" for me, I suppose I'll have to rind out for myself. (Goes to encyc. — hums softly as she hunts.) Good land! all the T-H's I can find, seem to be thermometers of some kind. What time do you expect Fran back, Nan? Nan — (Rousing with a start) Um, H'm, yes I guess so (vaguely) . Jean — You guess so? Lord, no wonder you're the star of the history class, If you can put your mind on a stupid old thesis, when there's such a thing as college theatricals only a few hours off— and W(E ARE IN 'EM. Nan — (Sighing) Well, I suppose it's no use trying to finish my work with this crowd around. (Brightening.) But honestly, girls, I'm as excited as I can be, and I'm so N-e-r-v-o-u-s. I just know that I'll forget my cue and pirouette Avhen I ought to be making a bow, or else I'll be bowing to you, Jean, when you have your back turned squarely to me. Jean — Well, come on, let's try it a few times before Fran, comes in. Grace you may be the orchestra. All ready, now. (They go through the steps of an old-fashioned minuet, Grace hums. At end, Nan makes a very deep curtsey, and rolls over on floor. All laugh.) Nan — (Getting up and shaking herself) You hard-hearted wretches to laugh at me. I just know something awful will happen to me tonight when I'll have a hoop-skirt to manage besides. Well, the only consolation is, that if I should roll over, at least I shall be able to make a generous display of my own great-grandmother's best Sunday-go-to-meeting pantalettes — and ruffled ones at that. Grace — Why, Nan Barrett, I'm shocked at you. Nan — Well, I can't help it if you are. Say, do you know I think Francina's going to make a hit with her solo — she plays so beautifully. Don't you think so? Grace — Yes, she surely does, but (thoughtfully) I do just kind of wish that Mary Sherman wasn't down for a violin solo A Bl l" OF SCANDAL 7 too. You know, I can't seem to take to that girl, somehow or other. 1 don't know why, either. I hardly know her — but sh^'s so — so- — er — well. 1 don't know just what she is — hut 1 don't like her. \an — Well, T sort of used to feed that way myself, when she first came here, but lately I've had a feeling that the girl's unhappy, and that's why she acts so queer. Jean — [Surprised) Why Nan, 1 didn't know that you had made friends with her. Nan — I haven't. But sometimes I feel as though I ought to. especially since she has a room on the same floor with us'.' But she's rather distant, I must admit, and — (), here's Fran at last. Now we'll bear what's been done about the program. You know, really. I can't help hoping — (Enter Fran, violin case and music roll in one hand. Hunch of fJoirers pinned on coat.) Francina — Hello there, everybody. (Sinks into chair.) My dears. I'm so tired, I'm simply a corpse. Grace — Well, I must say you're very fittingly decorated. (Points to flowers.) But we've been waiting here hours, haven't we girls, to hear about the arrangements for the big show. Did you get the program? Francina — O, my dears, I'm dead. Don't ask me to say a word, please. If you only knew — Jean — Now, there, there, you poor dear, of course, you're so all in Ave wouldn't think of ALLOWING you to even speak. No indeed, you must just sit right there and rest. (Starts to fake off Francina's hat for tier. Grace removes gaiters for tier. Sfan tier coat, etc.) Chorus — Of course you're tired — now don't think of saying a word ! Francma — (Jumping up and laughing) 0, go on, you old frauds, don't I know I'd never get out of here alive If I didn't tell you all about it. Well (taking a long sheet of paper from pocket), I've got it — here it is. Chorus — 0, do let me see it. Francina — Gently, gently, my children. There is more to this than greets the eye. First, I've got a confession to make. 8 A BIT OF SCANDAL You know "open confession is good for the soul." Well, then, here goes. You see — er — I'm — well — I'm going to play — Nan — Well, that's nothing new. Grace, do give her a poke, please, so she'll get to the important part. I'm slowly dying of suspense. Grace — {Picks up pointer) Madam, our high chief ruler hath commanded me to poke you. Beware, lest I poke too hard. Francma- — (Laughing) 0, do stop your foolishness, girls. Well — here goes. I'm to play for my first number— a — piece — THAT I COMPOSED MYS'ELF. Jean — Why, Francina DeVoto, how perfectly fine — but — you wretch — you never told us! I'm just delighted. Grace — Wonderful ! Nan — Well, for goodness sake, don't stop there. Do tell us all about it. Francina — Why, I've been practicing with Sig. Forni for over a month, and, of course, he's helped me a whole lot. When I first wrote the thing I was almost ashamed to even show it to him, but — well — I finally did, and he thought it was fine, and he spoke to "The Ogre" about it, and she was willing, and — and — well, that's all there is to it, except (unfastening music roll) that here it is and I'm not to touch my fiddle again until I play it tonight. I've practiced three hours today. (Sinks into chair) 0, I'm -so tired. Jean — Well, I just think that's wonderful. Who'd ever have thought that we were entertaining a genius in our midst. That's what comes of having Italian blood in your veins. I always knew that Italians were artistic. I don't see what particular good it ever did me to have my great grandmother's great grandmother come over in the Mayflower. Grace — But Fran, tell us about Mary Sherman. I do hope that you play before she does — I •should hate to have her come first. Francma — (With a frown) Well, she DOES come before me. She's the second on the program and I'm the fifth, and to tell the truth, girls, that's the only thing about this that I don't like one bit — but what could I do. You know the Ogre. No use to start anything in the shape of an argument with her. Nan — No indeed. All the thermometers that Jean found in A BIT OF SCANDAL 9 Brittanica would immediately forget that they had any mercury it would go down so low once she fixed you with her icy stare. Grace — well, Fran, you don't have to be afraid of Mary Sherman. I've heard you play before now, and I'll bet on you every time. Let's forget about 'Contrary Mary' anyhow, and talk about something pleasant, I see she's left her fiddle and stand here all ready. Francina — Yes, you're right, Grace, I'd much rather not talk about her any more nor about the concert either. As a matter of fact, I'm starved. Have you girls had your lunch yet? Jean — No, we waited for you. We wanted to hear the news. And say, girls, I've got a bright idea. Grace — Never ! ,, T -i i , (Together.) ■ Nan — Impossible! v ^ ' Jean — (With a withering look) Suppose, instead of going- over to the Hall Dining Room, we stay here and have a rarebit for lunch. We've got nearly everything here and it'll be a sort of celebration before the great event. Grace — Gee, that'll be fine. Nan — Scrumptious, but we'll have to hustle. You know The Ogre made us all promise to rest at least two hours this after- noon so as to be nice and fresh for the evening. Jean — 0, we'll be 'fresh', never fear. I feel frisky enough to do a Rag Time Jazz right here and now. (Seizes Nan and whirls her round, others all clap.) Francina — Well, I'm tired enough to sleep for a week, the way I feel now, and hungry enough to eat — YOU (makes faa at Grace.) Grace — Well, if it's all decided, let's get a move on. I'll run over to my room and get the chafing dish, and one of you'll have to go over to the Coop (Co-op) and get some 'Good-natured' alcohol. Jean — I'll go. Nan — 0, if all you girls have to go out, I'll go up and get that box of goodies that mother just sent me. I'll contribute it to the feast in Honor of "Our Genius." Think of YOU (tummg to Francina) composing a piece all your own ! (While sJie is speaking, door at L. front opens cautiously. Girls do not notice. Head of girl is seen. Intruder carefully closes door all but a crack and stands listening.) 10 A BIT OF SCANDAL Francina — Well, it's hardly a compliment to me to have you all so surprised to think that I COULD do it. I wrote all about it to my mother last week, and she — Nwv — My, won't she be proud of you Fran. Francina — She will, certainment! But come, I perish of hunger! I must go up stairs with my hat and coat. Will you girls be long? Grace — no, I'll fly. We ought to be back in three shakes of a lamb's tail. Francina — Whatever that may mean. But what shall I do with my precious music? I should die if anything ever hap- pened to it. {Looks about for place to put it.) Not that I need it. I know the whole thing by heart and I could play it with my eyes shut. Jean — Why don't you put it in the drawer of the table. Then we can lock it and hide the key. Nobody else will be using this room before we come back. If you keep it in your room you'd surely dream about it, and we must all be sure and get in our beauty sleep this afternoon. (Opens drawer.) Don't you think this is a good place, girls. Nan — Why yes, I think so, Nobody'd touch it anyway. Come on girls, I can almost taste that rarebit. You girls hurry now. (Meaniohile, door at L. has closed. Listener disappears. Exit Grace and Nan through door at back, Jean lingers to wait for Francina, ivho takes music, places it in drawer, locks drawer, and places key in little vase on top of book case. Exist Jean and Francina.) Silence for few seconds. Door at L. again cautiously opens. Girl is seen. Hesitates, then tip-toes softly into room. Glances around anxiously. Walks about room as if searching. Stops frequently to listen. Tries drawer of table. Shakes head. Looks under rug. Shakes out every tiling on table. Hem^s slight noise. Starts nervously and listens. A II is silence. Goes quickly to book case and appears to be intently looking for a book. A voice is heaved coming nearer, singing a popular air. Enter Grace carrying chafing dish. Does not see girl at book case. Grace — {Setting dish on table) Turn -turn, dee dee, turn turn di dum (turns and sees other) Good gracious, how you startled A BIT OF ►SCANDAL 11 me. I did not know there was a soul here. Can I help you Miss Sherman? Mary — {Quietly) No, thank you, I was just looking for a certain book that 1 saw here last night. 1 have it now. [Takes book from case and goes quickly out of room.) Grace — [To Nan just coming in) Gee, 1 don't like that girl. she's got ■such soft sneaky ways. Nan — (Surprised) That girl? What girl? I didn't see anybody. G-race — 0, that Sherman person. She was in here when I came up, looking for a book, and when I spoke to her she jusl cut me oil' in that cool little way of hers and took herself and her hook off double quick. Nan — Well, I suppose she surmised we were having a jam- boree, seeing you with the chafing dish. You could hardly blame her for not staying. I suppose it would not hurt us to ask her in. Grace — 0, nothing doing. She'd spoil the party. Shh, here eomes the girls. {Enter the others.) Francina — Well, here we are back again. What's doing'.' Nan — Grace, you get the eggs and beat them, there's a good child. Grace — Sure, where are they? Nam — Why, in the refrigerator, of course, where else should they be? Grace — The refrigerator, 0, of course (Goes to window, opens it, takes in large box, from which she carefully extracts two eggs). You see, at the present price of eggs, I didn't think you allowed yours out alone at night. But I've sad news for you. These are the last. I guess it's the collection box for us to gather up the price of another dozen — and I'm as poor as a church-mouse this week. (Takes bust off pedestal, I urns latter upside down, tripes it out with towel extruded from under cushion of one of chairs, upon which Francina has seated herself.) Sorry to disturb you honey, but you see (airily), this light house- keeping's such a bore, especially when one is entertaining. (Places pedestal and ton-el on table, goes to Victrola, and from lower part extracts small frying pan, two saucepans, a few dishes, knives and forks, etc. Puts all on floor, hunts anxiously for 12 A BIT OF SCANDAL something else.) For goodness sake, Nan, the egg-beater's miss- ing. (The others look up.) Jean — Well, you didn't look in the right place. That egg- beater makes sweeter music than ever came out of a Victrola. We keep it in the safe, my dear. Grace — yes, of course, I forgot. (Goes to utility box w window seat, unloads all pillows. Pulls out egg-beater.) Eureka, I have found it. (Waves beater — Sets to work vigorously beat- ing eggs in bowl made of inverted pedestal. Others meanwhile bring salt, pepper, cream, crackers, etc.) Nan — (Stirring) Well. I think we are ready for the eggs. (Grace attempts to hold bowl aloft and pass it to Nan with a flourish. Nearly stumbles.) Grace — Mercy. Jean — Good Heavens, Grace, do be careful. Think what a calamity if you had dropped them. Nan — Shh, just take a look at Francina. She's fallen asleep. The poor kid. She's worn out from all this excitement. We ought to pack her off for a nap double quick, or she'll be 'all in' for tonight. Jean — Just imagine anyone sleeping when there's a rarebit around. She'd never forgive us if we didn't wake her up to have some. Shh, I hear someone coming. If it's the Ogre, we'll all get a call down for not going out for a regular lunch. (A knock. Nan opens. Enter Marry Sherman.) Nan — Why good evening — er I mean good afternoon — er — won't you come in? Mary — (Stepping inside the door) Thank you. I — er — didn't mean to intrude. Jean — 0, that's all right. It's, no intrusion at all. You see we were just having a little celebration in honor of tonight. (Mary starts.) Nan — Won't you stay and join us — the rarebit's all ready. (Gra.ee brings plates and Nan serves.) Mary — no, I really mustn't. You see I was just coming round the corner when I met Miss Ogilvie and she gave me this to give to Miss DeVoto. It must have come this morning while she was away. Isn't she here? (Look around and see Francina asleep — holds up letter.) A BIT OF SCANDAL L3 \m sees. Nan gives Fran plate, and all ■continue to eat.) Nan — Gosh, girls, the rarebit's all cold, but don't blame me. This is what comes of having a genius in our midst. Franeina — Now girls, don't be so silly and call me that. 14 A BIT OF SCANDAL You know it's not so. I just happened to write this piece, and I'll probably never get up enough eour {Turns, and for the first times catches sight of Mary) good afternoon, Miss Sher- man, I hope you'll pardon me but in the excitement of all this I never even noticed that we had a visitor. I guess I quite for- got my manners altogether, but you see I was so overjoyed at the thought of seeing my darling mother that I'm sure you'll forgive me. Mary — Why certainly, don't mention it all all — indeed I don't blame you in the least. Jean — Are any of your folks coming for the grand affair, Miss Sherman. Mary — (Quickly) 0, no, you see there is only my mother, and she wouldn't come. Francina— WOULDN'T. You mean COULDN'T, don't you? Mary — {Sadly) No, I mean WOULDN'T (embarrassed si- lence. ) Grace — (Breaking in with apparent effort) Well, I think it's about time the orchestra was playing "Home, Sweet Home" for all of us. Fran, You're dead tired, and it's time you got to bed, for we've all got a big night ahead of us. and we'll catch it if the Ogre comes in here and finds us celebrating. Anyway, it's Jean and Nan's turn to do the dishes, I'm very thankful to say, so you and I can "Eat it and Beat it." Wan — Heavens, Grace, what slang! Think what Professor "English-as-she-is-spoke" would say if she could hear you! Grace — Well, I should worry, Heavens, there's some more. Well, I can't help it if she is shocked. The dear old frump. She hasn't got a thing on her mind, but English-as-she-should- be-spoke, while as for me (airily), a popular young person like me, why, I've got so much to think about, that I really cawn't be bothered (mocking) abaout figuring aout the correct English expression for every trivial little trifle. Naouw, young ladies — Jean — (Others all laughing) W T hy you old fraud, you haven't got a thing on your brain but your hair, unless — Grace — (Still affectedly) WelL, thank, fortune, I've got plenty of that (touching her 'Crowning Glory') and I don't have to pretend that I like it 'bobbed' (with a face at one of the others who if possible should have short hair) simply because it's fashionable — when we all know — oh, but there, what's the A BIT OF SCANDAL 15 use of my spending my efforts on such a Low-brow, unapprecia- tive audience. Come darling (to Frcmdna) we will leave this plebian atmosphere. (Takes Frcmdna around waist.) { \ a thief — a thief. She stole — she deliberately took my poor Fran- cina's music. She must he expelled — of course — there is no other way. The Ogre — Well, I had hoped that it might not be necessary to go so far, but, of course, if you insist — Mrs. Devoto — Insist — of course I insist — it is the only way. The creature must be punished. My poor little Francina — she must be — must be — what you call it — recompensed — for such humiliation. The idea ! The Ogre — Well, I have sent for Mary Sherman, and she will be here directly. May I ask that you leave us alone for a little while to talk over this unfortunate matter. Mrs. DeVoto — Of course, of course, 1 would not meet the creature for the world. I go to my poor Francina. (Starts to go. Enter Mary Sherman. They meet at door. Mrs. DeVoto turns away in disdain. Mary shrinks hack. Exit Mrs. DeVoto.) Mary — You wished to see me. The Ogre — [Icily) I certainly did, Miss Sherman, although it is the most painful duty that I have to perforin. Never has the honor of Briar View been so sullied. And never has an act so flagrant been committed within its sacred walls. I am amazed and pained — {pauses for breath) ahem, inexpressibly pained, at this — ahem — dreadful occurrence. I am told that you are a Southerner, too. (Mary winces.) That makes your act all the more surprising, for Southerners have always been associated in my mind with people who have been the souls of honor. Have you anything to say, Miss Sherman, about your most — ahem — extraordinary conduct ? Mary — (SloivJy) Why no, I don't know that there is any- thing more that CAN be said. I did it — I took Miss DeVoto's 20 A BIT OF SCANDAL piece and played it — I knew just what I was doing — and — well — that's all there is to it. The Ogre — That's ALL. Well, I should think that was quite enough. At least you are going to say that you are sorry, I hope. Mary— {As if weighing her words) W-h-y, I think I regret all the trouble I have caused you and the College, Miss Ogilvie, but — that — is — all. The Ogre — That is All. Well, I must confess, Miss Sherman, that I certainly do not understand your attitude. It seems to me — in fact, in quite expected to find you bowed down with shame and humiliation at the dreadful thing you have done, and here you stand and calmly tell me that your only regret is at the thought of the trouble you have caused me. Really this seems very strange. (Looks at Mary expectantly — Mary remains silent.) Well, then, it becomes my very painful duty, to say, ahem, that you are expelled from Briar View College IN DISGRACE. I trust that at last you realize — Mary— {Showing signs of JOY) EXPELLED! Really! 0, thank goodness. The Ogre — (Shocked) Miss Sherman! Do my ears deceive me? Really (angrily) I am at a loss to understand — I cannot comprehend such actions. Why — you appear actually — actually • — GLAD that you are expelled. Really this is most extraordi- nary. I have been associated with this college for thir — ahem — a great many years, and I must confess that I have never in all that time been called upon to reprimand a student for being- overjoyed at the news of her expulsion from the college. (Moves towards door.) Of course, I shall notify your mother at once. (Mary winces.) Ah, I am glad to see that your feelings are touched at last. Well, Miss STierman (angrily), if you come to your senses later on, and find that you have something to say to me after all, I shall be in my office. (Exit Miss Ogilvie.) (Mary sinks into chair and covers face with hands. Enter Nan hurriedly. Mary starts up. Nan half retreats.) Nan — (Coldly) Pardon me, I did not know that this room was being used. Mary — (Jumping up) 0, Miss Barrett, please, just a minute ('wipes eyes) I know you must — you must — just hate me — all the girls must — but — A BIT OF SCANDAL 21 Nam — Well, you could hardly expect them to — er — exacth praise you, after what has happened. Y<>u sec. it happens thai we are all extremely fond of Francina. Mary — Yes, yes. I know, and really 1 liked her myself — very much indeed. Nan — You did. Well, 1 must say that you took a mighty queer way of showing it. Mar// — 0, I know that it must seem very dreadful to you all, this thing that I have done — but if you only knew the rea- son—if you only — Miss Barrett, 1 wonder if you'd let me tell you about it. I feel as if I should go mad if I didn't tell some- one. (Cries.) If you could only know what I went through he- fore I could make up my mind to do it at all — I feel as though, perhaps, you wouldn't judge me quite so harshly. Nan — Well, of course, if it will relieve your feelings so much I am perfectly willing to listen. (They sit.) Mary — You know, of course, that I am a Southerner (A t awi nods). "Well, my home is a large old Colonial place that has been in my father's family for generations. My father is dead, and since his death my mother and I have lived there, And 0, we were so happy — we were all in all to each other. I adored my mother, Miss Barrett. I worshipped her. Nan — Why do you speak in the past tense? Your mother is still living, isn't she. Mary — Yes, she is, but it's not the same You see, she married again, and he — that is — my step-father is the cause of all the trouble. I could not bear him, and he certainly returned the feeling most heartily. You see, I knew that he did not care for my mother as I did — I knew that he had only married her for the money and land and property that my father had left her, but mother was infatuated with him and could not see it. 0, how that man hated me. He knew that I could see through his motives. But, of course, it meant that my mother was com- pletely changed towards me. I have lost her — just as much as though she had died. (Breaks down and cries.) Nan — Why you poor child, no wonder you were unhappy. Mary — (Wiping eyes) Well, 1 stood it all until one day. that — that — beast concocted a scheme so dreadful that I could hardly believe my ears. You see. ever since I have been a little girl in pinafores, I have — er — well — 1 have had (blushes) — er a 22 A BIT OF SCANDAL sweetheart — a young boy who lived on the next estate to ours — Robert Manners. i Nan — Not Bob Manners. Why, my brother knows him. Yen mean the one whose father/ lost all his money, and then- — well — committed suicide, and then the son gave up the old home and everything lie had in the world to pay the debts and clear his father's name? Is that the one you mean. Alary — (Sadly) Yes, that's the one, and I have been engaged to him for several years. But now that he has his own way to make in the world it means that we shall probably have to w 7 ait for a long time. But I did not mind that for I sure was mighty proud of the tiling that he did. But my step-father thought differently. You see, a friend of his named Cabot, bought the Manners estate — a man who belongs to one of our oldest South- ern families — and my step-father has made up his mind that I am to marry this man. In fact, he's trying to force me to. Nan — 0, you don't really mean that! Mary — You don't know him. He's capable of anything. Yes, he thinks I ought to marry his friend because he has money, in spite of the fact that he has been married before and is forty at the very least — and fat, too although he's hardly fair. Well, between the two of them they've talked to my mother so much that they've made her agree with them, for you see, this man's family is one of the proudest in Virginia, and they think I ought to feel honored by his willingness to make me his wife. Honored, indeed! I'd like to — choke — him — -and my step-father along with him. Nan — Well, I don't know as I blame you. I think I'd like to help you do it. Mary — Things got so bad at home that I just couldn't stand it. Seemed like I'd go crazy to see my mother ordered round by that man, and I was most worn out trying to hold out against both of them — for, of course, I'd never give in and promise to give up Bob. Nan — I should think not. Mary — So at last I got mother to consent to my coming here to college for this year anyway and letting the matter rest till I got home again. But I was so worried and unhappy about Bob, that I just couldn't mix with the other girls like I wanted to and I just kept thinking all the time how I could find a way A BIT OF SC \M).\L 23 to spoil my step-father's plans. One night, when I \\;is most awfully bliu\ it just popped into my head thai if 1 could do something to disgrace myself, something that would be a blot on a family's honor, or that would gei me expelled from the col- lege, why — well, the Cabot family's so proud, they'd never stand for anything like that, and so, well — then yon see. he wouldn't want to marry me. Nan — Ab. ha! I begin to sec the daylight. Hut the plot thickens. Please go on — I feel as though a real thrill was coming. MarH — Well, the other afternoon I just happened to be out- side the door when Miss — when Francina was telling about com- posing the piece and I don't know just how it happened, but it came to me in a flash, that here was just the opportunity that I had been looking for. But Miss Barrett — I hated to do it — honestly I did— I hope you'll believe me — I — I — never stole a thing in my life, and I don't know what Bob'll ever say to me when he finds out. {Cries.) Nan — {Blows nose violently) Why you poor child, of course, I believe you. {Wipes eyes.) Why, you've even got me going on the water works. You know, I told the girls that I thought there was some reason why you were so distant. Well, well, to. think that here's a girl crying because a man WANTS to marry her, and most of the rest of us are crying because they DON'T. There, there, honey {pats Mary), you cheer up. and I'm going- right upstairs and tell the whole story to Francina and her mother. "Blessed are the Peace-makers," you know, and I'm the greatest little peace-maker you ever knew. We won't tell another soul about it until you have been "duly expelled." My word, just imagine HELPING anyone to GET expelled. Every- thing seems to be turned around just the other way to what it usually is. Well, don't you worry, honey. I'll fix things up all right. {Exit Nan Back.) {Alary picks up magazine, goes to large chair at left, turns it round and seals herself, had: /<> audi' nee, completely hidden from view. Enter dean and Grace, Had: R., carrying out-dooi clothes, coats, lams, ice skates, hockey sticks, etc. Place clothes on chairs, skates and slicks on floor.) Jean — Let's rest in here a few minutes before we go out. 24 A BIT OF SCANDAL (Glances rcmnd.) Hasn't this been a terrible day. I'll never forget it as long as I live. Grace — 0, now please, Jean, don't start that miserable Mary Sherman business again — I'm just sick and tired of hearing about it. Jean — Well, you may be, but it's awful, just the same. But somehow, Grace, I do pity that girl. Grace — Well, I must say that you and Nan do surprise me. I certainly do think that you are both taking this affair in the strangest way. Why you seem to forget that Fran's our friend and that we have known her for years, and this girl's just a new-comer, from goodness knows where, and here you are — Jea/n — Yes, I know it must seem queer, but listen. I met Nan a little while ago, going up to Fran's room, and she looked so solemn and — and — sort of thoughtful that I'll just bet she knows more about this affair than she's telling. Grace — (Hotly) Well, I don't care what she knows. I know all I want to know about Mary Sherman. The girl's a thief, a plain, common, ordinary thief, and that's all there is about it. Jean — (Shocked) Grace, don't say that. (Mary Sherman spring up, knocking over chair, flings magazine on floor in rage and confronts two girls who stand amazed. ) Mary — How dare you say such things about me — how dare you. It's a lie, do you hear — a wicked lie — I'm not a thief — I'm not — I never stole a thing in my life, never, never, do you hear — and you don't know what you are talking about (to' Grace) you — you little — you harradan. (Bursts into tears and rushes from room back R.) Grace — (Drawing long breath) Whew! What a little spit- fire. Who'd have ever thought that she was sitting over there all the time. Well, listeners never hear any good of themselves, tis said, and it certainly proved true in this case. Jean — (Uncomfortably) Yes, I know, but just the same, Grace, I wish — I do wisli you hadn't come out quite so plain and called her — well — a thief. You know, that's an awful tiling to say about a person. Grace — (Angrily) Awful! Well, it's the truth, isn't it? What is she, I'd like to know? I believe in calling a spade a A BIT OF SCANDAL 25 spade. You girls make me tired. {Puts on hat, coat — takes up slates and stick.) I'm going out and get 'some fresh air into my brain and forget all about this whole miserable business. (Makes drive with stick.) I guess it'll do me good to let some of my temper out on a hockey ball. You coming'.' Jean — Er — no. I don't think so, not just now, anyway. I don't feel much like it after all this. I guess I'll stay here and read a while. Grace — {Moving to exit at II.) Well, I'm going. If you change your mind and decide to come out, you'll find me up at the east end of the lake. So long. (Exit Grace.) (Jean sighs audibly. Seats self at table, tries to read. Restless. Flings down book. Walks to L., picks up magazine from floor where Mary has thrown it. Seats self again, tries to read. Finally throws aside magazine, rises, puts an hat and coat, takes up skates and stick. Slowly exits. Back />'. CURTAIN. 26 A BIT OF SCANDAL ACT II (The garden of the Hart home, the following summer. Summer furniture scattered about. Table at L. front. Door at R. front presumably leading to house. Garden bench at R. of door. Golf sticks resting against bench. Tennis racquets against chairs. Canoe paddles and cushions where convenient. Another door back ivall R., if possible all of glass, looking cnit to road. Two steps in front of door leading to house. (Nan and Grace on opposite sides of garden, playing ball.) Grace — Doesn't it seem just great to have all the girls to- gether again. Nan — It sure does. You know that was one of the reasons that I hated to have college close — the girls somehow seem to drift away so soon and some of your best friends you never even see again. But it's certainly awfully nice of you, Grace, to have us all here for this week. (They continue to play ball, talking as they play.) Grace — 0, indeed it was nothing of the sort. I was just dying to see you all again, and besides I felt as though I owed you all something after the perfectly awful way I carried on over that affair of Mary Sherman. (Enter Jean and Francina — R. front. ) Jean — Hi there, give me a catch. (Nan throws ball to her.) Francina — Whom do I hear taking Mary Sherman's name in vain? Say, by the way, where is she, Grace? Grace — 0, she's coming later. Say, wasn't it perfectly great that I could persuade her to come at all. You know, my Dad's quite pleased to think that she's going to be here. The last time she visited us lie took quite a fancy to her — and as for my- brother Dick — well — -it's a shame that Bob Manners got in ahead of him. (Nan looks at Jean.) The only trouble is that we can't get her to come here often enough, not more than once in a blue moon. Jean — Well, you mustn't forget that she is working for her living these days; not like us spoiled darlings, just going around having one perfectly grand time all day long. I think it was just splendid the way she refused to go home after she was A BIT OF SCANDAL 27 expelled and be dependent upon her mother, lint — er — do yon know, Grace, I never noticed that Dick was especially attentive to — er — Mary. Nan — (Aside to Grace) I knew that would gei her started. (To Jean) I never noticed either, that he was particularly (imi- tating Iter) attentive er — to — er — Mary. Did you. Fran? Francina — (Somewhat mystified) 1 — er, why no. I don't jusl get what you're driving- at. Grace — Well, never mind dear, you'll wake up when the joke's all over. You know geniuses are always such unpractical persons. But to get back to the interesting subject under dis- cussion (nudging Nan.) Of course, Dick's MY brother, so I really ought to know whom he likes, oughtn't I? ■/can — Well, Im' perfectly willing he should LIKE Mary Sherman. Chorus— O, YOU ARE! Francina — (Waking up) Well, the idea. And you kept this from me all this time. You wretch. (Gives Jean, a hug.) Jean — (Haughtily) Well, I'm sure I don't know what you girls are talking about. I know I haven't SAID a word. Nan — No, darling, of course you haven't. You didn't say a word to me either at school last winter. I just GUESSED it. You know I'm a Yankee for that. , Jean— Well, I (smiling) do think he's kind of nice, and I guess — Grace — (Interrupting) Well, he must be — lie's MY brother (Goes over to Jean.) There, there, honey, don't you let this bunch "get your goat." Heavens! There goes that old slang again, and I promised dad to forfeit a quarter of my allowance every time I broke out again. Gosh. I'll need a poor-box collec- tion if I keep on. But anyway don't you mind this crowd, Jean. I think Dickie's pretty nice, myself, even if he is my own brother, and (shaking a finger at Jean) 0, what he says about you. (./'"/> looks confused.) Nan — Well, to get back to 'Lady Mary.' Just fancy a girl like that going to ^vork. (Bounces a tennis ball on racquet.) Why, do you know, my brother knows her folks quite well, and he says her father left heaps of money and that half of it is Mary's if she wants to make a fight for it — but she won't do a 28 A BIT OF SCANDAL thing' about it on account of her mother. Southern pride — that's what I call it. Grace — Well, my dad says that if Mary doesn't hurry up and claim the money pretty soon, there won't be any there, for that step -father of hers is a regular scamp, and he's going through the funds just as fast as lie can get hold of them. Francina — Why don't you get your father to talk to Mary about it, Grace ? Grace — He has tried to — but she won't listen on account of her mother — and you know when Mary makes up her mind to a tbing she usually sticks to it. Jean — Yes, I guess she proved that to all of us. Grace — You see, she says that she wouldn't make her mother uphappy for the world, because she knows that it is only a matter of time when she will find that man out for herself — and then she'll be unhappy enough. And I can't tell you how per- pectly awful Mary feels to think that her mother hasn't written her a line since that affair at college. Nan — Well, that's all her step-father's doings. My brother says that Mary's mother is just, as fond of her as she can be, but she's dead scared of that man. She doesn't care for him half as much as Mary thinks she does; and Frank says he'll bet dollars to doughnuts that one of the fine days, Mr. Step-father'll light out, and leave his wife altogether. Francina — Well, I hope he does, and very soon at that, for I know for certain that Mary Sherman will never be happy until she had made up with her mother. What time do you expect her Grace ? Grace — Why she ought to be here on the next train. (Looks at wrist watch.) Nan — Have I told you that my brother Frank met Bob Manners last week? All— No. Francina — 0, do tell us about him — I'm really awfully anxi- ous to meet him. I've heard so much about him and I think those Southern fellows are awfully fascinating. Nan — Well, I'm anxious to meet him myself, but I know he must be pretty nice, for Frank just raves about him, and fel- lows don't usually do that unless there's something to rave about. Bob's doing very well, and he feels very badly to think A BIT OF SCANDAL 20 that Mary insists on working, and saying she'll never marry him unless her mother consents. Grace — Well, I'll tell you something you'll all be interested in. 1 meant to keep it a secret, hut perhaps it is jusl as well to let you all in on it, because then we can plan just what to . (All stand round in expectant attitudes.) Well, my dad prom- ised me that he would do his hest to get Mary's mother to come up HERE some day during- this week, and see if we can't fix things up so that she and Bob can get married. Frcmcina — My, my, but that will he fine. 1 do hope that he will succeed. Grace — And now what do you say to a game of tennis. 1 think we've got time before Mary's train is due. Fran, you and I will play against Jean and Nan in a set of doubles. What do you say? Francina — Suits me. [They all take racquets.) Grace — Wait just a minute till I leave word in ease Mary should come while we are gone. (Goes to door — />'. front — raps Smartly.) Cora, we are going down to the tennis court for a little while, but I expect another guest — Miss Sherman — you remember? The young lady who w r as here in the Spring? Gora — 0, yes indeed, I remember her well, Miss Grace. A very sweet and pleasant-spoken young lady she was. Grace — Well, if she comes before we get back, will you take good care of her, Cora? Give her some iced tea and cookies out here in the garden, and tell her to read and rest until we come. Gora — Very well, I will, Miss Grace. (Exit Cora — A*, front.) Grace — Well, now I think we're readv. Come along girls. (Exit all — laughing and chatting.) (Auto horn sounds out in road. Cora comes running out. Door leading to road opens. Enter Mary Sherman ca » rying suit-ease. Cora takes bag from her. Mary stands in door-way waves her hand to person outside and calls.) Mary — (Out loud) Good-bye, good-bye. Thank you ever so much for driving me up, Good-bye. Horn sounds again growing fainter. (Mary comes to C.) Ah, how do you do, Cora. I see you have not forgotten me. Cora no, indeed, Miss. Miss Grace and I have often spoken of you. 30 A BIT OF SCANDAL Mary — (Looking round) And where is everybody. Surely they expected me? Cora — 0, yes, indeed, Miss Sherman. Miss Grace and the others were here only a moment ago, and they went down to the tennis court to play for a while. I think Miss Grace didn't ex- pect you quite so soon. Mary — No, I suppose she didn't. But you see my employer was coining out this way, and he offered to bring me out in his machine, so I didn't have to wait for the train. Cora — Well, Miss Grace said as how I was to make you comfortable out here in the garden until she came back. Will you be taking off your things, Miss Sherman, and I'll get you a cold drink. (Takes Mary's wraps and bags and goes into house. Mary strolls about and finally seats self at table. Re-enter Cora bringing tray containing tea-things. Goes back to house and returns with magazine. ) Cora — Miss Grace said you were to rest and read here in the garden, Miss Sherman. (Hands Mary the magazine — ar- ranges table.) Mary — All right, Cora. You are certainly taking very good care of me. But first I think I'll do full justice to your very dainty lunch. My! but that iced tea looks good. (Moves chair — seats self fairly facing audience. Proceeds to eat and glanc(\ over magazine at same time.) (Auto horn sounds again. Rapping at door back R Cora goes to door and opens. Mrs. Sherman- Wheeler stands in door-way, clad in duster, auto hat, etc. Mrs. Sherman-Wheeler — Is this the Hart place? (At the sound of the voice, Mary starts, listens in si rained attitude but does not turn.) Cora — Yes ma'am, it is. Will you come in? Mrs. Sherman-Wheeler — Thank you, My but we've had a hard time finding the place. (Mary jumps up. Turns round and faces her mother.) MARY SHERMAN! Mm^y — Mother! (Stands hesitating as though uncertain \ BIT OF SCANDAL 31 what to do. Mrs. Shei man Wheeler opens arms. Tliey rush to each other a/nd embrace. Exit Cora softly I', front.) Why, mother dear. how do v<»n tonic to be here? Mrs. Sherman-Wheeler — [Wipmg eyes) Well, my Wear. Mr. Hart sent me word that you were going- to be here and that if I wanted to see you this would lie a good chance. You see. ho knew how lonely it has been for me, now thai I am all alone. Mary — ALONE! Why mother where is — where is — Mrs. Sherman-Wheeler — THAT MAX! Don't ever mention his name to me again. He's GONE! and I never want to even think of him. You were right, Alary, child you could see through him better than T could. (). how I have suffered {weeps). Mary — Well, never mind, munisie dear [caresses her), it's all over now, and we're well rid of him. Perhaps things can be just as they used to be before he came. Mrs. Sherman-Wheeler — Do you mean that, Mary? Can you ever forgive me for being such a silly old women? Mary — Silly! Nonsense. I won't have you calling your- self bad names! We all makes mistakes sometimes, and you are just the best mumsie that ever was, and I love you as much as ever. [Embraces her.) Mrs. Sherman-Wheeler — Well, you don't know bow thank- ful I am darling, to hear you talk that way. I was afraid that you would never want to see your foolish old mother again. We've been awful lonesome for you Mary, the old place and I — won't you come back to us- — honey? Mary — [Hesitates) W-e-11 — it all depends — on — Bob. Mrs. Sherman-Wheeler — BOB! Bless bis heart. Why the old place is plenty big enough for all of us, and I'm just dying to set my eyes on him. You'll just have to bring him along with you, honey. Mary — [Rushing over and hugging her) You darling mum- sie. That's just what I was hoping you'd say. [Enter Grace. Jean. Van and Francina, just in time to see Mar// and stranger embracing. Swinging racquets and laughing.) Grace— Hello, what's this? Mary — [Turning to meet them) Hello there, everybody. I got here just a minute after you left. [They ail kiss. Mary takes 32 A BIT OF SCANDAL her mother's hand and leads her to C.) And now girls, I want you all to meet my mother, Mrs. Sherman-Wheel — Mrs. Sherman-Wheeler — No, just Mrs. Sherman, plain Sherman from now on. I hope that you girls will all forget that it has ever heen anything else — and we want you all to come down and see us at the old Sherman place in Virgina, don't we Mary? Mary — Deed we do. Because you see girls, that's my old home, and it's going to be my new home too; mother's and — mine — and — Bob's. (Holds out her left hand.) Francina: — Bob's. (Catches up Mary's hand and looks.) Ah, so you are going to be married at last. 0, I am so glad for you, my cherie! (Mary nods smiling at her mother.) Mrs. Sherman-Wheeler — Yes, and the sooner they do it the better pleased I'll be. And girls, I invite you all to the wedding —a real old-fashioned Virginia wedding. Nan — Well, we all accept on the spot, don't we, girls. (All nod.) Francina — (Hugging Mary) 0, you darling, I'm just as ex- cited and pleased as I can be, and just as happy over your news as though it was myself. Who would ever have thought last year in college that it would all end like this. Mary — (Squeezing her mother's arm) Well, at least it's been a very happy ending for me. Grace — It is for us, too, and really it is the first time in my life I've ever know so much good to come from a "Little Bit of Scandal." CURTAIN. ^ NEW HIGH SCHOOL PLAYS ALONG CAME BUD— for 4 boys and 2 girls. Bud, quite inno- cently causes a lot of trouble, but all ends well. when Bud comes along. Price 25c. CLARENCE DECIDES— is for 4 males and 6 females, and is a very clever comedy. All kinds of funny situations are introduced. Price 35c. THE CAPTAIN'S PREDICAMENT— a rattlirg good farce for 3 males and 4 females. Lots of fun. Price, 35 cents. LOST— THE WHOLE CROWD AND THE PARROT— a farce in which many amusing complica- tions aiise. Plays whole evening. 8 males and 5 females. Price, 35 cents. POLLY LOU— a new Gladys Bridgham farce in which there is plenty of action and an interest- ing plot. 6 males, 8 females. Price 35c. THE VISITING SMITHS— a short sketch telling how the Smith's Corner Smiths descended on the New York Smiths for a visit. Price, 25 cents. THE CONVERSION OF PA. THE TRIALS OF EZRA— two new Agricultural Extension plays. Each, 25 cents. Eldridge Entertainment House Franklin, Ohio, also 944 S. Logan, Denver, Colo. 3> LIBRARY OF CONGRESS 015 939 937 Flays for Amateurs BY SEYMOUR S. TIBBALS Mr. Tibbals has won a wide reputation as the writer of plays for amateurs that have dramatic action, bright dialog and clean and wholesome plots. Among the most successful of these are Somewhere In France; 4 m. 3 f ........ . 35c Sergeant Jim of the U. S. Marines; 7 m. 1 2 f ....... . .35c The Little Politician; 7 m. 3 f ....35c Getting Even With Reggie; 5 m. 8 f. 35c At The Village Postoffice; 5£ y acter8 ...35c The Man Haters; 11 f. 4 m ....35c Vinegar's Vaudeville Agency; j^w 35c The Millionaire Janitor; play for boys 35c In Dixie Land; male characters 35c Up Caesar's Creek; boys' play ...35c Christmas Plays Christmas at Finnegan's Flat 25c Christmas at Golden Gulch.. 25c ELDRIDGE ENTERTAINMENT HOUSE FRANKLIN, OHIO, also 944 S. Logan, DENVER, COLO.