.0^ .•VL'^ <> V *'* <^ -OHO- ^' ^ •" ^^ f' ^ A^ ^lL^*^> V" •I.'.f' «;i<. A^ .♦W ^-,* "^jv AT ^^raa^* *^ «. *^^^*• *r>. AT *irf?^ /h." '^ t^ ♦ CiiiK^i * ^4* A^ * rf^ S» /)l. "^rk W^ * y\j|| nV . O « • ^ »q • A^ ^C<» o .4,^^v -.1 <\ V • • • , ▼ ' MY in^THER'S KISTELL: onns, IN M E M O R Y O b' 3. @.. WHO WAS DROWXED NEAR GLOUCE'^TER, MASS., AUGUST 16th, 1850, AGED LIII. ^rintcL> for |.ln(3:ite pistrlbutiaiT NEW YORK : FEINTED BY EDWARD 0. JENKINS, 2 6 Frankfort Street. 18 5 6. Entereil iiiTonHng !•> Ai-t of CuiiEress, in the year 1856, by A. MASON, y /( V- la the Clerk's Office of the Dietiiot CoiMToTTlie United Slates, for the Southern District ot New York. CONTENTS PREFACE, . . . . . . . . 6 ON BEADING TENNYSON'S "IN MEMOEIAM," . . d 1. HOME. AS IT WAS, 12 II. HOME AS IT IS, 15 III. HOME AS IT WILL BE, 18 IV. TEARS, - . 21 V. ARISE, MY LOVE, MY FAIR ONE, AND COME AWAY, . 23 VI. MY FATHER'S BOOK 26 VIL YEARNINGS, 8) VIII. THE SEALED FOUNTAIN, 34 IX. FRIENDS IN HEAVEN .87 X. WEAKNESS' 4) XI. ACQUIESCENCE, 41 XII. THE APPROACH OP DEATH, .... 42 XIII. A SABBATH EVENING, 45 XIV. " WEEP NOT, FOE THE LION OF THE TRIBE OP JUDAH HATH PREVAILED," 48 XV. '• I WENT OUT FULL, AND THE LORD HATH BROUGHT ME HOME EMPTY," 52 XVI. WEARINESS, 55 XVII. THE FAVORITE PSALM, 58 XVIII. THIRTY-SEVENTH PSALM, 60 XIX. DOUBTLESS HE IS AT REST, . . . . .62 XX. THE PARTING YEAR, 65 XXI. DEPARTURE, ........ 68 XXIL ST. JOHN'S PARK 71 XXIII. CLOUDS 74 PAGE XXIV. MESSAGES TO THE DEAD, 7T XXV. CHEERFULNESS, 80 XXVI. THE WISH, 83 XXVII. "SUDDEN DEATH SUDDEN GLORY," . . 85 XXVIII. A FEW MORE YEARS FROM HEAVEN, . . 8T XXIX. WHY SHOULD WE KEEP HIM? ... 89 XXX. OLD LETTERS, 91 XXXI. THE FIRM FOOT, 94 XXXIL I WOULD NOT BE WITHOUT THIS GRAVE, . . 96 XXXIII. YOUTH HAS FLED, , . 99 XXXIV. THE WALDENSIAN PASTOR, .... 1<)2 XXXV. SYMPATHY, lOT XXXVL THE RECALL, 1C9 XXXVII. "LET NOT HIM THAT GIRDEfH ON THE HARNESS BOAST HIMSELF AS HE THAT PUTTETH IT OFF," 112 XXXVIII. FROM JAFFA TO JERUSALEM, .... 115 XXXIX. THE THREE PICTURES, 118 XL. A SKETCH 12) XLL THE WHITE STONE, 123 XLII. THE QUEST FOR THE SPIRIT, ... 125 XLin. MY MOTHER'S SONG, . . . ... .128 XLIV. THE SICK ROOM 13J XLV. THE MINISTRY OF ANGELS, .... 133 XLVI. THE TRIUMPH OF CHRIST'S CAUSE, . . 186 XLVIL MOONLIGHT ON THE SEA-SHORE, . . . 139 XL VIII. FAMILY PRAYER, ...... 142 XLIX. MY TWO DREAMS, 144 L. THANKSGIVING, 150 LI. THE BIRD, 1S2 LII. MOURNER'S LITANY, . . . . • 156 LIII. RESURGAM, 159 L'BNVOI, 161 NOTES, 163 P K E F A C! £„ Few words are needed by way of preface to a volume not meant for general use, printed merely to avoid re- peated transcriptions, and read, for the most part, by those bound either to subject or writer, in ties of family affection or long friendship. Yet as two or three passages, considered separately, may seem to breathe a degree of sadness inconsistent with Christian hope, it may not be amiss to mention that this is by no means their design. They do but attempt to express, in turn, some of the darker phases of feeling incident to a real sorrow. Such feelings of course differ, according to the tem- peraments of different sufferers, and the scenes around them. Over some heads the shadow of affliction passes with comparative speed,- — their life-tempests, though heavy for a ,time, soon cease, leaving behind them an air all the purer, a sunshine all the more brilliant, for the brief darkness. But in other cases they are more like that which befell St. Paul on his way to Italy, " when neither sun nor stars in many days appeared," 6 and escape from sliipwreck proved but the forerunner of wearisome captivity. The cloud may, now and then, divide and yield g-limpses of the serene brightness bej'ond it ; yet, when these are over, Heaven seems again absent — sorrow is present — and the heart sinks. For this state there is but one cure— "looking unto Jesus." The exulting songs of a faith less tried or more triumphant, may fall on the sad spirit like trumpet-notes of cheer upon the heart of a wounded soldier left alone by the way-side. Inspiriting to others, they only deepen the anguish of one who cannot arise and answer their call. But the thought that He who sends trial was Himself " acquainted with grief," can change murmuring into submission, and induce a willingness to follow that Saviour with patience, if not with rejoicing, to the end, Since he— so tenderly loved, so truly mourned — in memory of whom these verses- are written, was taken away, how many of his associates and kinsfolk have fol- lowed ! Scarcely will this little book find its way into a single household " where there is not one dead ;" and doubtless this very fact will do much toward winning for it a welcome. To his surviving friends and kindred it is now offered in affectionate trust, as a memorial of the departed. New Yokk, May 5, 1856. I* O E M S. ON READING- TENNYSON'!^ ''IN MEMORIAM." FAIR memorial ! thou wert planned In poet-vision, purged by tears; And thou wert piled through lingering vears Of love and grief, with tireless hand. For Love alone so rich a store Of thoughts like jewels, ever brought From secret mines, in stillness wrought, No Grrief less faithful might explore. And lavished now, as treasure spent On saintly tombs, they serve to show His wealth of heart who sleeps below, And his, who reared the monument. 1 10 For while we read, the rainbow light From stained oriel seems to fall Aslant on snowy marble pall, With chisell'd broidery bedight ; And marble mourners, carved with care, In motionless attendance kneel. As though their vigil could reveal How he was loved whose dust is there. My own dear Father, could my sighs Embalm thy name in deathless song,- Or could my tears, by process long, Thus into splendors crystallize, — Then with what gladness v^^ould 1 raise By patient toil, as pure a shrine, And from oblivion worth like thine There shelter for a few brief days ! Alas, I cannot even tell How funeral wreaths may best be twined, Or in thy chaplet blossoms bind. Of amaranth and asphodel : ii Yet as through village laues, a sound Regretful sweeps from passing bell, Numbering the years with solemn knell, Of one in cerements newly wound ; So the deep love within my soul In long vibration still intones Our loss afresh, and daily moans Thy death, with melancholy toll. We will not rear some costly stone To publish how our dear one died, Nor suffer idle tongues to chide His requiem's plaintive monotone : Ah no ! let reverent footsteps tread Beside the turf where violets be. And only eyes which loved him see The words that mourn our holy dead. 12 HOME AS IT WAS. We had a home, a happy home, a home that never changed, Though site and casing varied oft, and far its mem- bers ranged ; A spirit-tent, with magic folds, to curtain us around. Repelling every evil thing from their enchanted bound. It stood within a city's walls, and yet in bustling mart. The hum of business could not drown the music of the heart ; It crossed the seething ocean, and rough gales in fury blew. But failed to rive one bulwark of a love so firm and true. 13 'Twas then a simple cabin, o'erhung by locast trees, Where fragrant blossomings allured the humming- birds and bees. And the bright-crested rover, as he bent to kiss the flowers. Seemed like happiness alighting on that quiet home of ours. Next from its roofing gazed we forth upon a noble bay, There argosies from every clime in floating phalanx lay; But oh I how trifling looked the gauds of luxury and pride. To us whose chosen place of rest was by each other's side. We had no need of alien mirth to make our house- hold gay, For a glad atmosphere of peace encircled it alway ; And faith grev/ stronger when, at times, affliction's gentle rain Brushed from its drooping leaves the dust, and bade it bloom again. 14 We had been told that bliss was brief, we knew life's brittle thread Could easily be severed, and all its pearls be shed ; But still we hoped our own bright home for many a year might stay, Ere from the precious belt of love dropped one fami- liar ray. The callow birdling tranquil lies, yet unaware how blest, Nor sees the tempest gathering to hurl away its nest ; For downy is the fragile couch, the parent wings are warm. And it has not learned to tremble at vague omens of a storm. Ho lived we in our happy home, until Death's shadow fell Across the threshold suddenly, and overcame the spell. Rent for awhile our charmed roof of shelter from the blast. And left us but a rifled home, whence light and joy had past. 15 11. HOME AS IT IS. A STILL, secluded spot Where man intrudeth not, Though close along the beaten way it lies ; The terraces are green, And cedar-branches screen, Those modest tenements that round it rise : And there the sun's rays pause at eve, As dear friends linger ere they take their leave. Unto the postern low, I often, often go, And could " continual coming" entrance win, Long since mine eager will Had gained the wished-for skill To put aside the bolts, and pass within, And now my vexed soul might share The peace inherited by dwellers there. 16 Alas ! that fierce assault Is in itself a fault, And proves that 1 the meet credentials lack, All passionless and calm, Each breast and folded palm, At whose approach the rigid doors fly back, And leave the path unchallenged, free, Welcoming them, though pitiless to me. I linger there in Spring, And hear the wild birds sing In the blue dome, above the cedars flying ; For in my heart their lay Tells of a sunnier day When, to ray mute advance at length replying, Those long-locked portals will unclose, And I shall taste an unimpaired repose. And when the autumnal breeze Sighs through the rustling trees, Clothed in the raiment of their bright decay, (Like the resplendent dress Some youthful votaress Wears when she turns her from the world away. Her gorgeous robes and crown of pride, Soon for white coif and vesture flung aside.) 17 Then wistfully 1 wait For hours bet'ore the gate, In fruitless watching for some furtive sign ; The Warders dare not swerve, And iu austere reserve, Meet with their silence every plea of mine ; No force is needed to withstand The feeble efforts of my feeble hand. Impatient heart, be still ! One day the grating will Repulse no longer, though thou cease to pray ; Encloistered thou must hide Thy buried ones beside, And then thou wilt forget the flinty way, Where thy unwilling feet now roam, Far from the precincts of thy peaceful home. 1* 18 III. HOME AS IT WILL BE. Home as it will be ! the vision rises In perfect loveliness, refulgent, pure, As sudden moonlight joyfully surprises One lost at nightfall on a pathless moor! Home as it will be ! Would the veil were lifted, Shrouding its pinnacles in golden haze ; And would some fragments of its wealth were drifted O'er the dim channel mocking our sad gaze. *One who in spirit saw our home, narrated His rapt remembrances, in tones that seem With the full harmonies of Heaven dilated, Caught from the "harpers harping" in his dream. * Rev. ch. 1 : 10 and chaps. 21 and 22. 19 Transparent streams, through greenest meadows flowing, And odorous incense, wafted on the air, And trees of life, tlieir mellow fruits bestowing On holy beings, walking white-robed there ; Seas in their smoothness, like a crystal flooring. Half tesselate with clouds of ruby glow ; And emerald rays, that fall on saints adoring, A shadowy limning of its beauty show. For glorious were the far-off scenes unfolded Before the loved disciple's eagle ken, And glorious was the form wherein he moulded Their blissful memory for his fellow-men. But from another's lips* the tidings issue In simpler phrase, yet with deep meaning fraught, Craving the aid of no imperial tissue To robe its inborn majesty of thought. The flaming barrier for his way was levelled, And palms of Paradise around him waved. His tranced ear in her rich music revelled. While her weird lessons on his heart were graved. * 2 Cor. xii. 1-4 ; Phil. i. 23. m 20 But mortal tongue such secrets may not utter, And in the strife both speech and symbol fail, His bravest words in brief aspirings flutter, Then with bowed pinions from the splendors quail And yet that Silence, in its dove-like brooding, Bears to Faith's ear a message, sweet and clear. As if an Eden-gale, the guard eluding. Came whispering, " It is better there than here." Home as it will be ! From our side receding. Beneath its lintel kindred feet have trod. They wait us there, and we, 'mid briars impeding. Still hasten onwards to our home with G-od. Home as it will be ! 0, when re-united, That untold " weight of glory," we shall share. The house of praise, by Grod's own presence lighted, May well outshine the earthly house of prayer ! 1 21 IV. TEARS. Oh do not say my father see.* Each heart- wrung tear I shed ! To deem him near me could not ease My sorrow for the dead. 1 would not have him read the sign Of straggle with despair Upon a face whose every line He used to think so fair. I would not have him hear the cries I cannot yet control, Nor ripple with my dreary sighs The quiet of his soul. 22 I would not have him watch my t(;ars — Tears that would quickly cease, Might his calm voice but chide my fears, And soothe me into peace. And do not say " So great his gain, His affluence of joy, Even the knowledge of thy pain Would bring it no alloy." Can I believe he loves me less? My smiles could always raise Smiles of responsive tenderness, In the old happy days. And if a shade of saddening thought Upon my features fell, How eagerly his fondness sought To share it, or dispel. Tears were unlovely in his sight While he remained below ; Why should they trench on Heaven's delight? I would not have him know. 23 ARISE MY LOVE, MY FAIR ONE, AND COME AWAY. Was it the voice of a turtle-dove, Her truant mate pursuing, Filling the vs^elkin with notes of love. And his presence meekly w^ooing? " Spring-time is coming in copse and glade, " And rills are singing, and nests are made ; " Groodly the smell of the vine's young spray, " Haste, my beloved, come away ! Was it the murmur of southern breeze, To a convalescent sighing Of far savannahs 'mid foreign seas That in bloom and warmth are lying? 24 " Come from this region of snow and mist, " To an isle by unfailing sunlight kiss'd, " There the soft Zephyrs in spice-groves play, " Rise, thou pale one, come away !" Was it the cry of a nation's wrong, In its simultaneous waking, When the feudal harness strained so long, As a worn-out withe is breaking ? " Wilt thou follow forever a tyrant's beck, "And bow at his bidding thy vassal-neck ? " Tarn not aside from the righteous fray, " Thy country claims thee, come away !" Was it a clarion's sudden sound, On the hush of midnight pealing. Bearing this message — " The foe is found, " And his men on our flank are stealing ! "Yonder their files through the brushwood creep, " Soon on the column our fire shall leap, " Never a laggard may linger to-day, " Hark to the onset ! come away !" Was it some angel's dulcet song. Through a darkened chamber thrilling. And on the dying a foretaste strong. Of the bliss of Heaven distilling ? 25 " Fain would we bear thee, in bright convoy, " Up to a realm of unfading joy, " Life hath no beauty to lure thy stay, " Arise, fair one, come away !" Nay, dearest father, none of these Upon thy heart was pressing ; Nor ring-dove's moan, nor scented breeze Thy cheek and brow caressing, Nor tocsin's clang, nor trumpet clear, Had power to win thy willing ear ; Nor do I think an angel's lay Could woo thee from thy child away. One voice, one " still small voice" alone, O'er all thy wishes swaying. In loving, but resistless tone. Could charm thee to obeying. The Saviour spake : thy soul was stirred At his low call, by us unheard ; That summons might not brook delay, And our beloved went away. il 26 VI. MY FATHER'S BOOK. Written after his departure in a little volume of manuscript Poems, (so ciillcd,} which belono'ed to him. Ah poor, neglected book I How hard it is to look Again on thy once over-cherished leaves ; They rouse afresh the sense Of loss and grief intense, Now brooding ever o'er our household eaves. My Father^s book no more, . The dear delight is o'er. To soothe and cheer hiin with thine artless lays, It is no joy to read. He cannot hear or heed, — And every line seems harsh without his praise. 27 Why, when his fingers last Along thy pale leaves pass'd, Did'st thou not warn him of that fearful day, And mournfully unroll Some sad Sibylline scroll, To presage sorrow, and to bid him stay ? It is a bitter woe, When love can never know The latest utterance of departing life : could'st thou but reveal, (Breaking the grave's thick seal,) What thoughts thronged on him in that lonely strife! Vain wishes — bootless now I None, none may tell me how His placid spirit left its earthly tent : Of sky, and land, and sea, T question wearily, But answer to my cry is never sent. The songs recorded here Were full of buoyant cheer. Drawn from the springs of love and hope within ; But now my darkened heart Has lost its mirthful art. And only breathes out murmurs, moans, and sin. 28 little heeds the wren, Far down in peaceful glen, How loftily the eagle's flight may soar ! And voice of lilied brook, Laving some verdurous nook, Seeks noi to emulate the ocean's roar. The streams of nobler song Might rush in strength along — Bearing, like waifs, men's plaudits on their tide; 'Twas joy enough for him To hear my simple hymn Sung in the twilight by our own fireside. Never — ah never more ! Till life's long grief be o'er, Will those dear eyes in fond approval shine ; Nor that indulgent ear Again be bent to hear With partial praises each new lay of mine. Yet, selfish heart and weak ! Though life to thee look bleak, Why should his blessedness involve thy woe? Because in light he walketh, And with his Saviour talketh. Our home is silent, and our footfall slow. 29 And seraph-voices dear, Ring on his quickened ear, For home's old melodies he doth not pine. Most beautiful exchange I Why should I call it strange, If in their songs he have forgotten mine ? 30 VIT. YEARNINGS. Cold in death the frame now lieth, Dark and silent is its grave, Scarce the Holy Book supplieth Knowledge my weak heart will crave ; Prone to falter When God's Altar Claims the thing that most we prize, As a willing sacrifice. for a celestial missive ! Dated in some bower of light, Not with brightness too oppressive, Baffling the bewildered sight. ;-!! liufc in living, Langaagcj giving Out linens of that Sabbath shore Wliich the lansomed quit no more. Though I r(;ad that Heaven is better Than the holiest scenes below, Free fr