Class £5:iXu_ CoipghtN?_^Jj?il CDEXRIGHT DEPOSIT. (Denijonn ^oyalti/ Vlay:i Ig r "Bettys Uji^fBet 'Edith'EUiA T.S. 'Deninojt & Company 'Publidher^ • Chicago "Price SO Cent^ Plays for Schools and Colleges AARON BOGGS, FRESHMAN By Walter Ben Hare. Comedy In 3 acts; 8 males. 8 females. Time. 2% hours. Price, 35 Cent*. AFTER THE GAME ~ By LIndsey Barbee. Comedy in 2 acts; 1 male, 9 females. Time, 1% hours. Price, 25 Cents. ALL A MISTAKE By W. 0. Parker. Farce-comedy In 3 acts; 4 males, 4 females. Time. 2 hours. Price, 35 Cents. ALL ON ACCOUNT OF POLLY By Harry L. Newton. Comedy in 8 acts; 6 males, 10 females. Time. 2^ hours. Price, 36 Cents. AS A WOMAN THINKETH By Edith F. A. U. Palnton. Comedy in 8 acts; 9 males. 7 females. Time, 2% hours. Price, 35 Cente. AT THE END OF THE RAINBOW By LIndsey Barbee. Comedy in 3 acts; 6 males, 14 fe- males. Time, 2% hours. Price, 35 Cents. THE CLASS SHIP By Edith F. A. U. Palnton. Commencement play- let; 3 males, 8 females. Time, 36 minutes. ^^_^_^__________ Price, 25 Cents. CLUBBING A HUSBAND By Edith F. A. U. Palnton. Comedy In 3 acts; 12 fe- males. Time. 2 hours. Price, 36 Cente. A COLLEGE TOWN By Walter Ben Hare. Farce-comedy In 3 acts; 9 males, 8 females. Time, 2^4 hours. Price, 35 Cents. THE DEACON ENTANGLED By Harry Osborne. Comedy in 3 acts; 6 males, 4 fe- males. Time, 2 hours. Price, 35 Cents. AN EARLY BIRD By Walter B. Hare. Comedy in 8 acts; 7 males, 7 fe- males. Time, 2^ hours^ Price, 35 Cente. THE FIFTEENTH OF JANUARY By LIndsey Barbee. Comedy in 3 acts; 11 males, 10 females. Time, 2% hours. Price, 35 Cents. THE GRADUATE'S CHOICE By Edith F. A. U. Palnton. Commencement playlet; 12 females. Time, 35 minutes. Price, 25 Cents. T. S. Denison & Company, Publishers 623 S. Wabash Ave. CHICAGO BETTY'S LAST BET BETTY'S LAST BET A Farce-Comedy in Three Acts BY Edith Ellis AUTHOR OF "Mary Jane's Pa," "Contrary Mary," "The Man "Higher Up," "Mrs. Jimmy Thompson," "Whose Little Bride Are Youf" etc. CHICAGO T. S . DENISON & COMPANY Publishers ^^\ Please Read Carefully^ HE PROFESSIONAL STAGE-RIGHTS in this play are strictly reserved and all applications for its use should be addressed to the publishers. Amateurs may obtain permission to produce it on payment of a fee of twenty dollars ($20.00) for each perform- ance, in advance. Correspondence on this subject should be addressed to T. S. Denison & Company, 623 South Wabash Avenue, Chicago, 111. "^^> "v:> -Cv G/lttention is called to the penalties provided by the Copyright Law of the United States of America in force July 1, 1909, for any infringe- ment of the owner's rights, as follows : Sec. 28. That any person who willfully and for profit shall infringe any copyright secured by this Act, or who shall knowing,ly and willfully aid or abet such infringement, shall be deemed guilty of a misdemeanor, and upon convic- tion thereof shall be punished by imprisonment for not exceeding one year or by a fine of not less than one hundred dollars nor more than one thousand dollars, or both, in the discretion of the court. <:> ^> ^:::> COPYRIGHT, 1921. BY EDITH ELLIS cALL RIGHTS RESERVED .:. JCT 29 1921 ©Cl.[}" 5 9009 / BETTY'S LAST BET For Five Men and Six Women. CHARACTERS. Mrs. Darling A fVido'Xi- ivitli Four Great Problems. Katherine Called "Kitty," Her Eldest Daughter. jNIargaret Called "Peggy," Her Second. Dorothy Called "Dolly," Her Third. Elizabeth Called "Betty," Her Fourth. Hannah A General Servant Who Doesn't Like Men. Richard Wentworth Wealthy Man of Affairs and Colonel of National Guard. Percy Wentworth His Nepheiv and Ward; a Student, and Heir to a Large Portion of the Wentxcorth Fortune. Jack Van Loon . Of the Historic Fan Loons. Hamilton Moriarity A Rising Young State Legislator. Edgar Darling A Cousin Who Is a Student of Archaeology. Scene — Living room in the Darling house in a remote small town in Connecticut. Time — The present. It is a blight summer day. Time of Playing — Tz€0 and one-half hours. 5 BETTY'S LAST BET COSTUMES. Mrs. Darling — Act I, light summer house dress, hecoining; hair done high; earrings. Large white apron. Acts II and III, gray or dark silk or crepe afternoon dress ; lace in sleeves and neck. Hand- some comb. Kitty — Acts I and II, pretty light cotton sum- mer dress, black stockings and slippers. Act III, pretty dinner dress of light or bright material, shoes and stockings in keeping. Peggy and Dolly — Same directions. The girls' dresses should be planned for contrast. Betty' — Act I, first dress, handsome spring cloth dress and long cape, smart hat and gloves. Second dress, pretty cotton summer dress made in more youthful style and shorter ; black shoes and stock- ings. Act II, same as last dress in Act I. Act III, very charming dinner frock, slippers and stockings to match. Hannah — Neat plain cotton dress and apron. Richard Wentworth — Uniform of Colonel of National Guard. Small moustache if advisable. Swagger stick. Percy Wentworth — White flannel suit or white trousers ; silk shirt and dark sack coat, belt and hi'Ight socks and tie; white shoes and straw hat. Jack Van Loon — Gray sack coat and trousers ; silk negligee shirt, brown shoes and socks, motor cap. Hamilton Moriarity' — Blue or black sack suit, light felt soft hat ; fancy tic and socks ; gloves and motor coat. Edgar Darling — Panama hat, brown or oxford suit; cotton negligee shirt, black tie, shoes and socks. BETTY'S LAST BET LIGHTS. Footlights and borders full up, for it is daylight throughout the play. PROPERTIES. Act I. Wall telephone and bell. Large rug. Several small rugs if necessary to cover floor. Two window shades. Two pair sash curtains at windows. Two pair cretonne, chintz or denim lambrequins. Small desk with papers and writing material. Four large pictures on wall. Book shelves and books. Large reading table. Two easy chairs. Three small chairs. Lamp on table. Small desk lamp. Sewing table and chair. Sofa with cretonne cover. Three cushions. Victrola and records. Flower boxes for porch rail. House plants on window sills. Summer hat, flowers and ribbon for Peggy. Work box and sewing material for Peggy. Magazine for Dolly. Plate of fudge for Dolly. Tray of jars, painted inside to resemble canned fruit, for Mrs. Darling. Same for Hannah. BETTY'S LAST BET Three letters for Mrs. Darling. Hand satchel, hand bag and umbrella for Betty. Small book of poems for Kitty. Motor horn. Swagger stick for Richard. Act II. Silver and plates for sounds of cliaracters lunching off stage at opening. Napkin for Betty. Glass of water for Peggy. Locket and chain for Peggy. Suit case and satchel for Edgar. Tray with pitcher of lemonade, six glasses and plate of cake for Hannah. Glass crash off L. Photograpli album for Percy. Act III. Small tray, two wine bottles and eight wine glasses for Mrs. Darling. SCENE PLOT. Porch Rail Informal Garden Drop Window □Chair Window I I 1 Door f- Book^^"^® n ' ""chairDnrn ^^ \ < - Case □ sT^nd oes.LJnChair L.U. Door^'^ - Chair ■ — ■ Stand] I PI R. Doo onograph Lj Table □ I lOChair \\ STAGE DIRECTIONS. R. means right of stage; C, center, R. C, right center; L., left; U. L., up left, etc. Up stage, away from footlights; down stage, near footlights. The actor is supposed to be facing the audience. BETTY'S LAST BET The First Act. Scene: A pleasant Uiing room in the Darling home. Forenoon of the present day. The back wall of the room is broken by a door, C, leading on to a porch. On either side of the door is a win- doic draped with cretonne and fresh net hangings. Beyond the door is seen a porch rail, and back of that a fexv feet is a drop showing a country land- scape. The R. wall is broken by a door in the center leading into a drawing room or parlor. The L. wall has a door up stage leading to the dining room and kitchen. A lower door, L., leads to a pantry. Handsome rug on the floor; good pictures on the walls. Wall telephone R. of C. D. The furniture may be worn, but it is all good mahogany of fine design. Large reading table R. C. with chairs as shown in diagram. A desk up near window, L.; a settee, L. C. Easy chairs, stands, etc., as in diagram. A talking machine is down R., with record stand. Flowers are in vases about the room. A bookshelf or two against the icalls. The room shozcs that it is the home of women of taste, though it is a bit shabby. The sofa and one or two of the chairs have cretonne slips to match the curtains at windows. House plants are on the window sills and flower boxes decorate the porch rail. Rise of curtain reveals Kitty sitting at her desk in the window, L., and writing. She is a charming 9 10 BETTY'S LAST BET girl of twenty- three, very spirited hut dignified. Peggy is trimming a summer hat near the table, R. She is pretty, also, but not so tall as Kitty and of different type and coloring. Age twenty- one. Dolly lies stretched out on the sofa, her head toward the window on a pile of cushions, reading a magazine and munching fudge from a plate on the floor near her. She is also pretty but inclined to be plump, rather slower witted than her sisters, and young even for her age, which is nineteen. All three are dressed in pretty summer cottons suitable for morning wear, and all wear aprons. ^ Dolly. {In a droning voice.) "Gladys turned her eyes upon his with a look so full of pleading that as he gazed into their azure depths, something within his breast fluttered, swelled to bursting, and then like a tide retreated, leaving him helpless before her loveliness. *Gladys, my own,' he said — ^\Reaching for a piece of fudge.) Peggy. {Trying the effect of a bunch of flowers on the hat.) What do you think of this, Kitty.? Kitty. {Without looking up.) It's all right. Peggy. {Annoyed.) "All right".? What do you mean by all right.? (Kitty continues writing in silence.) Why, you haven't even looked. ^^ Kitty. {Looking up.) That's pretty. A httle more to this side, though. BETTY'S LAST BET 11 Peggy. I'm so sick of trimming my own hats. This poor old straw shape has been on duty so long it should draw an old age pension. Dolly. (Resuming, reading aloud, with her mouth half full of fudge.) " 'Gladys, my own,' he said, 'bear with me. I am not the man you thought me. I am not worthy of your love. But, oh, my sweet angel — ' " Kitty. Dolly, will you please shut up. Dolly. " '-—you have opened new vistas of life for me. You have—' " Kitty. And don't read with your mouth full; it's fright- ful. -^ Dolly. Peggy wants to hear this, don't you. Peg.'' Peggy. I haven't heard a word you've been reading. Dolly. It's adorable. I'll begin at the beginning. Listen. ''The sun was sinking behind the old red barn, and—" •, Feggy. {Crossly.) Don't give us anything about barns, or chicken coops. We've got enough of that sort of thing right here. Dolly. But j'-ou should hear how she meets him. It's the most romantic thing. "She was on her knees by the 12 BETTY'S LAST BET spring with her lily hands trailing in the cool water, when the shadow of his broad shoulders — " Kitty. Will you girls keep still? How anyone can write a line of poetry with your gabbing in one's ears, I'd like to know. (Resumes her position of thinking and finally gets a line.) (Dolly is eating the last piece of fudge. Peggy is tacking on the flowers.) Peggy. {Casting an eye on Dolly's fudge plate, and in a low tone.) Mother will give you the dickens for eating all that fudffc. ^ ^ Dolly. She doesn't know I made it. I hid it under my bed last night. {Voices of Mrs. Darling and Hannah are heard off U. L.) Mrs. Darling. {In a strong and rigorous voice, heard off.) We'll put them on the shelves now. Mrs. Darling enters with a tray full of canned fruit in her hands, followed by Hannah with an- other. The cans should he ordinary mason jars- painted on the inside with dark red, purple or hroxcn paint to look like fruit juice. Mrs. Darling is plump, handsome and forty-five, wearing a becoming house dress and hair done well. Hannah. {As she follows her in.) I always think they'd better be stood on their heads in the kitchen another twenty-four hours. BETTY'S LAST BET 13 (Hannah is tall, thin and rather gloomy; she wears a clean kitchen dress and is thirty-eight.) Mrs. Darling. Don't be so stubborn, Hannah. These cans have stood on their heads all night, and I've filled them up with iuice. _._. ^ -^ Hannah. Well, it won't do no harm to give them another twenty-four. , , ^ Mrs. Darling. Please don't argue. I guess I've put up fruit be- fore. Hannah. Yes, and those plums busted their tops off. Mrs. Darling. Dolly, get up and hold this tray for me. Dolly. Oh, mother! ,, .^ Mrs. Darling. Reading a magazine again^ — and eating ! What are you eating now? Dolly. Nothing much. ,, ^ ® Mrs. Darling. Do you want to weigh a ton.^^ It's fudge. I can smell it. Of all the fattening things it's fudge. Get up now and hold this tray. (Dolly does so reluc- tantly.) You lazy girl! How^ do you expect to get a husband if you weigh a ton before you're twenty? {Begins to put awaij jars on shelves in pantry down L) ^ XT Hannah. Oh, there's them that likes 'em fat. Peggy. (Sarcastically.). Yes : the Turks. 14 BETTY'S LAST BET Hannah. All the Turks ain't Mohammedans, Miss Dolly. There's plenty of Christian Turks right up there in New York. ,_ Kitty. (Rising and throwing down her pencil.) Oh, I give up! Y^'ou mig-ht as well try to write poetry in a foundry. Mrs. Darling. (Returning for more jars.) Poetry! What next? There's the garden to be weeded, and the chickens to be fed, and — Kitty. (In a burst of temper.) Oh, I'm sick of it all. We'll be doing these same things until we're a hundred. I'd like to run away. (Goes to the door and out on the porch.) Mrs. Darling. (Amazed.) Well, I never! Katherine, is that the way to talk? And before your sisters ! A nice example you're set- ^'"^- Hannah. (With a solemn wink.) She's got something preying on her mind. Love, most likely. p^^^^. (With a laugh.) Love? Yes, that is likely. Who is there to fall in love with in this place, I'd like to know? Dolly. That's what I say. We're doomed. Hannah. What do you bother about it for? You're ten BETTY'S LAST BET 15 times better off single. ' Look at ine. Do I worry about gittin' married? Not much. Mrs. Darling. {As she goes busily on putting away the jars.) You can't tell me, Hannah, that you're an old maid because you u^ant to be. It isn't human. Hannah. I wouldn't trade my liberty for the best man that ever smelled of tobacco. Peggy. Well, I don't mind saying that if there was a de- cent looking youth m this village, or a marriageable man, I'd take some interest in this danied old hat. But as it is — ugh ! ( With an impatient movement she sails the hat across the room.) ]Mrs. Darling. {Taking the last jars off Hannah's tray.) Tliat will do, Hannah. You may as well start making; those pies. *^ ^ Hannah. Yes, ma'am. {Starts up.) Mrs. Darling. We are going to have company for dinner. Kitty. Company.? ^^^ Darling. A young gentleman. Peggy. ^' Mrs. Darling. Yes ; I had a letter this morning saying we could expect him some time today. Who is it.? Dolly. Mrs. Darling. Your cousin, Edgar Darling, from Ohio. 16 BETTY'S LAST BET Kitty. What's the good of a cousin? Dolly. Why, it isn't against the law to marry a cousin. Mrs. Darling. That's right, Dolly. And beside, his mother, your father's sister, writes that he is a very remarkable youns" man. ^^ Kitty. How.? Mrs. Darling. He is an archaeologist. Peggy. That's all I want to know about him. Hannah. Does an archaeologist eat pie? Mrs. Darling. I should hope so. _.-. ^ Hannah. All right. But I'm only a plain cook, and I don't count on pleasing people that have a lot of 'ologies and 'isms in their systems. (She exits U. L.) Kitty. What is he coming to see us for? Mrs. Darling. He is on his way to Europe with a party of archae- ologists who are going to dig up Greece. {Finishing putting jars away. Takes letters from pocket, one opened, one unopened.) Peggy. What is lie like? Mrs. Darling. (Sitting on the settee. The girls hover around her.) Your Aunt Katherine says — you are named for BETTY'S LAST BET 17 her, Kitty — she says that Edgar is a model son, and devoted to his work; has never tasted liquor; never uses tobacco in any form. His English is so pure that she has never heard him use a word of slang. And as for staying out nights, he has never even been to the movies. (Refers to the letter, re- reading it.) ^^^^^^ Whv doesn't Aunt Katherine preserve him in al- cohol ? -r, Peggy. Yes ; there'll never be two like him. Dolly. Of course any man that comes to see us would be like that. ,^ Kitty. How long is this precious pet going to stay.^ Mrs. Darling. His mother says he will run down from New York ; that he will only have a day and a half to spend with us before his expedition sails. Kitty. I shall stay up in my room and finish my poem. Peggy. I shall make an excuse and go for a lonesome pic- nic in the woods. ^ Dolly. I shall go to bed and say I've got a headache. Mrs. Darling. Y^ou will do nothing of the sort. Teddy may not be the most lively young man in the world, but he's steady and reliable, and you might do worse. Kitty. I resign in Peggy's favor. IS BETTY'S LAST BET Peggy. I'd rather join Hannah's old maid class. You can have him, Dolly. -^ •^ Dolly. Oh, thanks, I'll pass him on to Betty. Kitty. Imagine Betty married to a man like that. She's lucky to be away. Mrs. Darlixg. Here's a letter from your Aunt Elizabeth. An- other complaint about Betty, I suppose. Tliat girl ! I imagine she's driving Elizabeth out of her mind. (Opens letter and starts to read.) Kitty. Betty's in luck. Think of it! School in New York and Aunt Elizabeth's motor car ! Mrs. Darling. ( Gasping. ) Good Lord ! ^ Girls. iTin J. • -i.:) (Together.) What Ls \t? y ir, } What on earth's the matter.^ Has something happened.^ Mrs. Darling. Betty's coming home. Coming home.^ Mrs. Darling. Yes. Coming today. Kitty. What has happened.^ ]Mrs. Darling. Elizabeth doesn't say- But slie says she can't BETTY'S LAST BET 19 have the responsibiHty of Betty aii}^ longer. She's been expelled, too. Expelled! Thmk of it! Peggy. Isn't that just our luck.? Mrs. Darxing. Expelled! Her aunt pays for her schooling and she gets expelled! Oh, that wretched girl! (Gets up and walks the floor.) After all her aunt has done for her. ,^ Kitty. It's probably onl^' one of her pranks. Mrs. Darxing. Only one of her pranks! It has been her pranks that have kept us all in hot water ever since she could walk. „ Peggy. PoorBettv! ^^ ^ Mrs. Darling. Coming today ! Well ! I'll teach her to get ex- pelled. I'll — (Telephojie bell rings suddenly/. It is on the rear wall R. of the doorway.) Peggy. I'll answer. (Runs to telephone.) Mrs. Darxing. It isn't enough that I've got four of you to marry off, but that the youngest, the one to go last, should torment the life out of me — Peggy. Hello. * * Hello. * * Miss Darling.? This is Margaret Darling. * * Oh, Miss Katherine Dar- ling. * * (Kitty jumps up; she motions her away.) I'll take the message. (Her hand over the transmit- ter, to Kitty.) Go away! It's for me. ^^'^^^^ 20 BETTY'S LAST BET Peggy. (Holding Kitty off.) Oh, Mr. Wentworth's butler. * ^ (All are trans- fixed except Kitty, who seems disappointed.) Yes. * * Mr. Percy Wentworth will call this morning.'^ Why, of course she will be at home. * * Very well. (Hangs up receiver.) Mrs. Darling. (Suddenly beaming.) Now that is a piece of good luck. Kitty, do you hear.? Percy Wentworth is coming to call this morn- ing. Well, are you dumb-f^ Kitty. I don't want to see him. (Peggy and Dolly ex- claim in shocked surprise.) Mrs. Darling. Are you out of your senses.? A boy that can buy and sell everybody in this place when he comes of ^^^ ' Kitty. Yes, when he comes of age. He's years younger than I am. ^r -r^ .Mrs. Darling. But think of his mone3^ Kitty. I don't want his money. Any way, he's a perfect fool. JJOLLY. Oh, Kitty, he's ever so good looking. Kitty. And he's shorter than I am. Mrs. Darling. I declare, I don't know what you want; money, position, youth. BETTY'S LAST BET 21, Kitty. I want a real man. Mks. Darling. The best catch, the only catch in Stockbridge, and you talk like that! Now, I want all this novel read- ing and poetic writing stopped. There are a good many million less men in the world than there were before the war. For a few generations you will have to take not the sort of husband you want, but the kind vou can s^et. ^ ^ Dolly. Mother, I'm crazy about Percy Wentworth. Mrs. Darling. Yes, but unfortunately Kitty is the one he is in love with. ,^ Kitty. Calf love. ^ r TA Mrs. Darling. When you can't get roast beef, a veal cutlet will do very well. Hannah rushes in, U. L. Hannah. Look, look ! Here comes Miss Betty, bag and bag- ^^^'- All. What ! Betty here already .^^ Goodness me! (Etc.) {They run to the door and presently Betty is heard.) „ ^ Betty. (Outside.) Hello, there, folks! Ooee! Anybody home.'^ Hello there, everybody ! 22 BETTY'S LAST BET ^lll shout and talk at once as Betty passes the window, R,y and meets them at the door. Mrs. Dar- Ung remains in the room, having crossed over to R. C. The girls are delighted to see her. She is dressed in a smart summer traveling suit, very groxvn up. Her hair is beautifully done. She carries a travel- ing bag and an umbrella. (The three following speeches are spoken together.) Kitty. Oh, Betty, how wonderful you look. What a stunning cape. X EGGY. My goodness, Betty! What in the world has happened at school? Dolly. For the love of goodness ! What are you home for ? Peggy, look at her clothes ! Betty. {Kissing them all around.) Kitty dear, I'm glad to see you. Hello, Peg, you old goop. Dolly, ni}^ g()odness, you're getting fat! ./ ._ Mrs. Darling. (Steimly and with folded arms, as she eyes her fourth daughter.) Well.'^ (There is a silence that might be cut with a knife.) ^ Betty. (With a weak little smile and a lower tone.) Oh, hello. Mamma! (Goes over and kisses her mother on the cheek; then stands looking at her and waiting for the storm to break.) You — you are looking awfully w^ell. BETTY'S LAST BET 23 Mrs. Darling. Thank you. It's a wonder jour conduct hasn't put me on a bed of sickness. Now I want to know the meanine; of this. ^ Betty. Meaning of what.^ Mrs. Darling. Don't answer me tiiat way. And what are you doing with your hair done up, and with this outfit "i You are dressed Hke a grown-up woman. Betty. Why, I am a woman. I'm past seventeen and — KiTTV. That cape is old enough for me. AIrs. Darling. Take it off. (Betty does so ruefully.) Give it to me. (Betty does so.) Now you sit down. All of you sit down. (Kitty, Peggy a?id Dolly' sit on the sofa in the order of their names. Betty' seats herself L. of table and Mrs. Darling on R.) Mrs. Darling. Now, to begin witli, where did you get this outfit.^ Betty. I won it. Mrs. Darling. What do you mean by "won it".? (Betty' does not answer, but looks at her glove.) Have you been betting again.? (Still no answer; the girls look at eaeh other.) Answer me. ^^ Betty'. 1 es. (All exclaim their displeasure.) 24 BETTY'S LAST BET Betty. Well, you set' it was this way. It wasn't my bet, it was Angela Simmons'. She has a lot of money and she's in the senior class. She bet me that cape against my bead bag that I won from Aunt Eliza- beth, that I couldn't get the faculty to let us have a dance in the gym on May Day, and I won. (All exclaim in astonishment.) Mrs. Darling. And that dress .^ _^ ijETTY. I won that from Aunt Elizabeth. Mrs. Darling. For what.f^ _^ Betty. She bet I couldn't run her car. And I did. Mrs. Darling. Have you done anything but bet since you've been in New York.? _, Betty. I should say I had. I've had a perfectly wonder- ful time. iMrs. Darling. Your Aunt Elizabeth has been very kind to give you this opportunity. And now I understand that the end of it all is that you have been expelled in your freshman year. Betty. Yes; isn't it disgusting? (Turning to he?' sisters and beginning to talk verij brightly.) Oh, girls, if you had only seen the — Mrs. Darling. (In a loud, stern voice.) That will do! (Silence instantly.) Now, young woman, what is this about your being expelled.? BETTY'S LAST BET 25 Betty. (With a sickly smile.) Oh, liave you heard about that? Mrs. Darling. Yes, I have. Betty. Oh Mrs. Darling. I should say it was "oh!" I've just got your Aunt Elizabeth's letter about it. Betty. Well, then, we don't have to discuss it, do y,\d? (Starts to rise.) ^^ ^ Mrs. Darling. Sit down in that chair and tell me what you have been doing to get yourself expelled. What new dis- grace have you put upon us all.^ Betty. Well, you see, Daisy Hunter in the sophomore class was crazy about an awfully cute chap up at Columbia. (Getting interested in the story at once, the girls are enthralled.) Her people thought they were too young to marry, and Daisy cried herself sick about it. We girls thought she was going into a decline, and he was just as bad — missed all his classes ; nearly died from drinking home-brew, and went all to pieces. (The girls all exclaim in sympa- thy.) Dais}^ told me all about it, and I fixed up a plan for them to run away and get married. Mrs. Darling, Elizabeth Darling ! ^ ^ Betty. Well, you wouldn't liave the poor girl die, would you.? Kitty. Oh, go on. 26 BETTY'S LAST BET Peggy and Dolly. Yes, do. iJETTY. Well, I borrowed Aunt Elizabeth's car after Hal had got a license, and I took Daisy for a drive. Then I got rid of Aunt Elizabeth's chauffeur. Peggy. Oh, how.? Betty. I bet he couldn't find nie a bunch of wild flowers, and while he was off looking for some I took the wheel, turned back toward town, picked up Hal, took them to the City Hall and they were married. Kitty. Wonderful ! Perfect ! Adorable ! Wasn't it.? Go on. Peggy. Dolly. Betty. Mrs. Darling. Betty. Of course Daisy's people, and Hal's, were furious. And they came to the school, and the papers got hold of it, and the faculty said I had ruined the reputa- tion of the school and all that — and — so they ex- pelled me, and here I am. Mrs. Darling. Y"es, here you are. A nice outlook, too. Four girls on my hands, and you, the hahy, covering us with disgrace! {Breaks down and he gins to cry.) No money; no prospects; and now this! Betty. {Going to her, much affected.) Don't cry, mamma; I'm sorry. BETTY'S LAST BET 27 Kitty. (Beginning to cry, too; the other girls follow suit.) We might as well be buried ali^^e. Peggy. Yes; we'll never get out of this hole. Dolly. I wish rd been Aunt Elizabeth's namesake. Betty. I really am sorry. If I'd realized — (rising) Mrs. Darling. If you'd realized! The same old song. Did you ever do anything in your life but get into mischief? From the time you could walk you've kept every- body around in hot water. But I'll settle you, miss. Y^ou take off that dress and stop putting on these old airs. If you are going to stay at home, you will be what you are, the youngest member of the famil}'. I'll decide what you shall wear after this. Betty. But, mamma — ^r t^ Mrs. Darling. If you'd take less interest in marrying off your schoolmates, and a little more in keeping up the fam- ily dignity, your poor sisters might have a chance. I'm expecting your cousin, Eddie Darling, to pay us a visit today. Betty. (Excitedly.) Mrs. Darling. (Goes to door U. L.) Y"es, really. And if you don't behave yourself I'll lock you in your room until he has gone. And no more bets, young woman ; no more bets. (Exits U. L.) Really? 28 BETTY'S LAST BET Betty. {Running over to C. The girls gather around her,) Who is Cousin Eddie? Peggy. Aunt Katherine's son. Dolly. He's coming today. Betty. What'll you bet he's good looking? Kitty. No more bets. ^ Peggy. Betty, Kitty's got a beau. Betty. Goody! Who is it? Wait till you hear. _. •^ Betty. Tell me. This suspense is killing me. Peggy. Percy Wentworth. _, Betty. Who's he? ^ Dolly. His uncle is the man who has bought the old Rob- inson house on the hill for a summer place. Betty. Then he must have a lot of money. Hooray for you, Kitty! j^^^^^. My dear, he's only nineteen. Betty. The angel clnld! Where did you meet him? Kitty. Mrs. Gordon introduced us at church and he asked to come home with us. BETTY'S LAST BET 29 Betty. But why didn't he take somebody his own age? Dolly. I wisli he would. _^ Kitty. Oh, it's only puppy love. Betty. Marry him for his money. He must be rich. Peggy. I think she's got somebody else in her head. Dolly. Yes, Kitty has taken to mooning ever since she came back from her visit to Aunt Margaret in Tren- ton. ^^ Kitty. All right, then, I have. Dolly. And she is very mysterious about that copy of Sonnets from the Portuguese. Peggy. Yes, never without them in her pocket. Betty. Come on now, Kitt}-, own up. Who's the Romeo P Kitty. No Romeo. He's — he's-;— oh, it isn't anything. {Very self-conscious.) Dolly. Oh, isn't it ! She's fibbing, girls. Peggy. Make her tell us, Betty. Betty. You're not in love with a married man, I hope.'' 30 BETTY'S LAST BET Kitty. I don't know. (.jj^^g (All at once.) What.? My goodness! You don't know? _,. Kitty. Why, you see — oh, it happened a month ago. I took a notion to wander through the woods on the old Robinson place. I got caught in a mass of barbed wire, and while I was trying to untangle myself, a very stunning man came along and helped Dolly. A stunnincc man.'^ „ ® Betty. His name, please. Kitty. I don't know. ^ Peggy. What was he like.? „ Kitty. (Floundering.) \er\ — very — well, cliarming and — and — Betty. Peggy. How old was he? Kitty. About thirty-five, I should think; and with such beautiful manners. _, Betty. Did he know who you were.? Kitty. No. -p, Dolly. How adorable! So romantic! BETTY'S LAST BET 31 Kitty. He flirted a little, and — Betty. (With a wink at the other girls.) And you didn't, of course. Kitty. Wliy? I was nice ; he had helped me to get out of that horrid barbed wire, hadn't he.'^ Peggy. (To Betty and Dolly.) Only gratitude, my dear, nothing else. Betty. What about the Sonnets from the Portuguese.'^ Kitty. The book fell out of his pocket, and when we parted at the Robinson gate he asked me to keep it as a memento. ^ Dolly. Wliat an adorable adventure. Peggy. And you never said one word about it. Kitty. What was the use.^ I'll never see him again. Betty. But perhaps he is one of the Wentworths. Kitty. {Gloomily.) No, there are only two, Percy and his uncle, who isn't down here yet. No, it was some stranger. I'll never see him again. _, Betty. Does mother know.? 32 BETTY'S LAST BET Kitty. No, indeed. She'd have a fit at iiij picking up an acquaintance like that. Betty. You're not the only one who's had an adventure. I have been going some myself. Kitty. Betty, what do you niean.^ Peggy. Do tell us, Betty. _, •^ Betty. {Mysteriously.) Come on over here. {She goes to the sofa; they all follow and the four girls squeeze down on the seat together.) Promise you won't tell. Girls. {Raising their right hands.) We promise! _. Betty. Well, my dears, you haven't heard the end of my escapade in helping out Daisy. The worst is 3^et to come. {They all exclaim in dismay.) Coming back with the car alone, I got into a mix-up with a milk wagon, and a traffic policeman arrested me for run- ning a car without a chauffeur's license. Girls. Arrested? g^^^^, {Smiling.) Yes, wouldn't that thrill you.^ Peggy. Awful! Kitty. If mother knew that! BETTY'S LAST BET 33 Betty. If you tell her I'll murder you. Dolly. Go on. I've got shivers down my back. Betty. Well, the judge was very nice and made the fine very light, but I had no money. Dolly. Heavens, did they send you to jail.^ Betty. No, I didn't even have to tell Aunt Elizabeth. Kitty. How was that.'^ _, Betty. Because my hero was there. ,. - ., Peggy. 1 our liero.'^ Betty. Yes, the best looking thing. Dolly. Adorable ! _^ Betty. He had just been arrested, too, for speeding. So he offered to pay my fine. Kitty. And you let him? _, Betty. What could I do.^ Of course I told him it was only a loan. _. '' Peggy. How much was it? Betty. The judge let me off with ten dollars on consid- eration that I was so young, so fair and so innocent. 34 BETTY'S LAST BET Dolly. But did you ever see him again? Betty. Yes. Wlieii I was changing trains at the Junc- tion, he was there with his car and lie drove me home. Kitty. (Amazed.) Here? He drove you to the door? Betty. Not nuich. I got out at tlie corner and walked. Peggy. Oh, wliat is liis name? Betty. Isn't it lovely. I don't know. Dolly. Everybody has a romance but you and me, Peggy. Bj,^^y. (With a sigh.) Well, it's all over now. We're all stuck here in Stockbridge for life. Except you, Kitty. Marry that child husband and get us out of here. Kitty. I'd rather die an old maid. Peggy. And be buried with a copy of Sonnets from the Portuguese in your hand. Mrs. Darling enters from U. L. with a gingham dress on her arm. Mrs. Darling. Now, miss, you get out of those duds and into something a Httle more suitable. March! BETTY'S LAST BET 35 Betty. What will you bet it's too short? (Going toward her mother.) ,^ .^^ Mrs. Darling. I am not bettinej. t, ^ Betty. My trunk will be right up, and Aunt Elizabeth has given me a very prettj^ dinner dress. Mrs. Darling. Well, if you think you're going to be expelled from school and then sit around in dinner dresses, you're very much mistaken. You will help about the house. _^ Betty. Don't I get a day ofF when I first come home to the bosom of my family .-^ ' Mrs. Darling. You do not. Go along now. (Shoves her out U.L., and turns to the girls, who have scattered. Kitty is at the table looking at her Sonnets. Dolly up at the door, and Peggy putting away her hat and serving material.) What were you all whispering and squealing about .^^ (Xo answer.) I asked you — Dolly. (Excitedli/.) Oh, mother, here comes Percy Wentworth, in his tennis flannels. Oh, he looks too adorable ! Kitty. I'm going. (Starts L.) Mrs. Darling. You will do nothing of the kind. (Untying her big white apron.) Peggy, take my apron away. (Peggy takes it and the sewing things out U. L.) Katherine Darling, you will stay where you are. 36 BETTY'S LAST BET And you will make yourself agreeable to Mr. Went- worth. The idea! {She is up L. C. ready to re- ceive. Peggy runs in again U. L. and places her- self near sofa. Kitty is R. of table. Dolly is by desk U. L., giggVuig hysterically.) Dolly, stop your giggling. Percy Wextworth enters the porch and is about to knock. He is a small but good looking youth of nmeteen, dressed in tennis flannels and wearing a straw hat. He is a shy but very sentimental boy, and it is a peculiarity of his temperament that he is constantly falling in love. So his manner is rather moonstruck. At the same time he is a gentleman and has a rather shy, naive charm. Percy. Is — er — is Miss Darling in? Mrs. Darling. ( Feigning surprise. ) Oh, dear me ! Is this — can this be Mr. Wentworth.? Do come right in. {Going up and almost hauling him in.) How charming of you to surprise us like this. Percy. Didn't my man telephone that I was coming.'' Mrs. Darling. Oh, yes, so he did. But that was the surprise I meant. (Percy is gazing around the room as if seeking someone. His eyes first light on Peggy.) Percy. Oh, how do you do.^ Mrs. Darling. You know Margaret, of course, my second. BETTY'S LAST BET 37 Percy. Oh— je — yes. {He turns up a little and meets Dolly's eyes as she comes down.) Oh, how do you Mrs. Darling. You've met Dorothy, my third. Percy. (Grormng very much embarrassed and miserable un- til he spies Kitty across R.) Oh, Miss Katherine! Mrs, Darling. Ah, now we know wlio you came to see. Percy. Oh, no, really, Mrs. Darling. It's such a pleasure to meet you all. ,^ Mrs. Darling. Won't you sit down? {She motions him to sit L. of table and gives Dolly and Peggy a signal to get out, which they refuse to do.) Isn't it warm this morning.'^ {She goes over to the sofa and seats her- self. Kitty sits R. of table, very bored and quiet.) But in that great big house of yours, you must be quite comfortable. {Again waves the girls off, but they hang on and go back- of the sofa and look in- terestedly at Percy. Dolly especially seems to ad- mire him.) Still you must find it lonely, don't you? Percy. {Xot listening, but gazing rapturously at Kitty, Is suddenly conscious that he is expected to answer.) No — not at all. Er- — yes. Yes — I mean, of course not! (Kitty stares straight ahead, quite unmoved by all this.) .^8 BETTY'S LAST BET Mrs. Darling. What did you say, Kitty .^ (Giving her a sign to wake up and entertain Percy.) Kitty. Nothinef. , , ^ " Mrs. Darling. Poor dear, she's been writing poetry all the morn- ing, Mr. Went worth. And you know how exhaust- ing that is. Vy^^cy. {Happily.) Oh, do you write poetry. Miss Katherine.^ Kitty. I scribble a little. Percy. How lucky you are — to be able to clothe your feelings in words. It must be tremendously — er — you know — and everything. Dolly. {To Peggy, in low voice.) Isn't he adorable? Peggy. {In a half whisper.) Mrs. Darling. You must get Katherine to show you some of her poems. They are so full of feeling and — and things. Percy. I should love to see them. May I? Kitty. I only write for my own amusement. I'm sure Ihey would bore vou. Percy. Not at all. I have an idea we would find that many of our thoughts are alike. I can't write po- BETTY'S LAST BET 39 ctry, but I can feel it. I often have the most won- derful feeHngs, especially in the moonlight. Don't you like the moonlight.^ Kitty. (Blankly.) Yes. ,, ^. Mrs. Darling. Oh, my dear Mr. Wentworth, I wish you could count the colds she has caught from walking in the wet grass watching the moon. I can see that you two have exactl^^ the same tastes. Percy. And that's the great thing, isn't it.^ To — to find people with the same tastes.^ That's what T tell my uncle. ^_ ^ Mrs. Darling. Is your uncle coming dow^n here this summer.'' Percy. Oh, yes. That's why he bought the old Robinson place down here. Y"ou know, he is crazy about his militar}^ work. He is going to plan for a rifle range in this neighborhood. Kitty. No? „ Peggy. Is it possible.'^ ^ Dolly. Oh, wonderful ! (Peggy and Dolly are all excitement.) Mrs. Darling. When do you expect your uncle, Mr. Wentworth.'^ Percy. He came down from the city yesterday. We had a fearful row this morning. 40 BETTY'S LAST BET Mrs. Darling. A row.? ^ Percy. Yes, he thinks I don't know my own mind. But I do, all right. {With a significant look at Kitty.) ^Irs. Darlixg. Of course you do. Kitty, take Mr. Wentworth into the parlor. Kitty. {Pouting.) But, mother — Mrs. Darling. Take Mr. Wentworth into the parlor. Kitty. Oh, very well. Won't you come in? {She goes to the door and waits for him. He rises, very much pleased, and goes to door R.) Percy. After you. (Kitty eo'its R. D. and Percy fol- lows.) ^ Dolly. I think he's perfectly adorable. Peggy. He is too young for Kitty, and too little. Mrs. Darling. Never mind. He's the best catch that will ever darken our door. {Going L.) I'll have Hannah serve some cake and lemonade. Y^ou girls keep out of the way. Y^our turn will come when Kitty's mar- ried and settled. {Exits U. L.) Peggy. We'll be gray-headed before that happens, I guess. ^ "" Dolly. Why couldn't I have Kitty's luck? BETTY'S LAST BET 41 Peggy. If he were only a little older — and taller. Dolly. I think he's just as nice as he can be. Peggy. 1 don't hear a sound from in there. 1 wonder if Kitty is freezing him out. (Going to R. D. and listening. ) ^ ( Joining her.) I wonder. ^ ^ ^ As they stand there with their backs to the room. Betty enters from L. with her hair in pigtails and a short dress on. The girls do not hear her as she runs over on tiptoe. Betty. {Just behind them as they listen.) Boo! {They give little screams and almost tumble bach in the room, then back away. Betty laughs.) What are you two doing.? Peggy. Now you've done it. Dolly. You mean thing. Betty. What's the matter.? Kitty. {Coming in from parlor, R.) What do you girls mean by acting like that.? It's disffustinff. ^ "^ ^ Dolly. It's Betty's fault. Peggy. Oh, go on, you're glad to get away from him. 42 BETTY'S LAST BET B ETTY. For goodness sake, who's in there? Peggy. Kitty's admirer. _, •^ Betty. Perc}'.'* Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know. Kitty. He's too silly for words. Hannah enters with tray containing cake and lemonade. ^^ Hannah. The minute a man enters tlie house, you've got to feed him. Here, you girls, take this. I can't be bothered serving wdth all I've got to do. Peggy. Hush, Hannah, he'll hear you! {Takes tray from Hannah.) Dolly and I will serve him. Dolly. Oh, that would be heavenly. (Peggy and Dolly rush into the parlor with the tray.) Kitty. I will not talk to that idiot another minute. Hannah. (Going back to her kitchen.) That's right, honey. That little whipper-snapper! Don't you bother with him. Kitty. I shall tell mother. Come on, Hannah, and stand by me. {Exits with Hannah U. L.) Betty, Beggars mustn't be choosers. {Goes over to par- lor door and peeks in. Sounds of Dolly giggling. A motor horn is heard outside. Bettv runs to the BETTY'S LAST BET 43 door, then in great excitement jumps up and down and waves her hand as if at someone.) Wait! Stop! Come in. Do come in. {After a moment she rushes back, smooths her hair and primps a little.) Presently Jack Van Loox, a ivell set up young man, enters. He is charming, humorous, polished, impertinent, insinuating and delightful. About tzcenty-three. _ ,. ^ "^ Jack N ax Loon. {From the doorway.) Well, look who's here! Betty. That's just what I say. Won't you come in.'' Jack. So this is where you live when you're at home. Betty. This is where we die of loneliness when we're at home. Won't you come in.'^ Jack. {Coming in.) And who arc we? {Sits in chair L, of table. Betty in chair R. of table.) Betty. Myself and my three older sisters. Jack. Married ? Betty. No, single. Jack. All of them.? Betty. All three. Jack. What's the matter witli this town.'* 44 BETTY'S LAST BET Betty. All the men arc either married or impossible. Jack. That is tough. What made you come back here.'* Betty. I couldn't help myself. My aunt was paying for my school there, and I — I got expelled — and sent home. I'm finished. flACK. Finished.? You.? Never! Betty. Oh, yes, I am. If the other girls can't get a hus- band, how do you think I can.? I'm the youngest of the lot. T Jack. Why, you've got the best chance of all. Why doesn't your father scare up a match or two.? Betty. I have no father. , Jack. Then tell your brothers to get busy. Betty. We haven't any brothers. Jack. What is this.? An Adamless Eden.? {She nods.) Well, this is serious. No wise guardians, old friends of the family, uncles or things.? Nothing like a mas- culine relative to shoo along the victims. Betty. Nothing in the male line nearer than a distant cousin in Ohio. ^ Jack. How did a woman with four daughters come to move to such a place as this? BETTY'S LAST BET 45 Betty. My father lost all his mone^^ before he died ten years ago. My grandfather left this place to my mother, and there was nothing to do but move here. Each of us is named for an aunt that has given each of us an education, and sent us her cast off clothes. Jack. But you showed yourself a pretty good little man- ager the way you helped your chum get married. Can't you do something for your sisters? Betty. In marriage there must be two. I can only fur- nish the bride. Oh, say, why don't you marry one of them.? Kitty is pretty, and Peggy is clever, and Dolly is — is — is good natured. Jack. And 3'ou.'^ {With a smile.) Betty. {Arclily.) Oh, I'm not offering myself. Jack. Unfortunately I am not a marrying man. Betty. {Indignantly.) I hope you don't think that I was liinting. Jack. Certainly not. I won't say that I'm not inter- ested in a girl I've rescued from imprisonment, though. B^^^^, {Jumping up.) Sh ! If my mother ever finds that out ! I'm going to earn my fine and pay you, though, if I have to go out scrubbing to do it. 46 BETTY'S LAST BET Jack. (Rising.) Never mention it again. Betty. By the way, if I should get ten dollars' worth of scrubbing and scrub it out, I wouldn't know where to send it to you. You never told me your name. And I couldn't catch it that day in the police court. Jack. Prisoners don't have names; only numbers. Betty. You won't tell me? What if my mother comes in? What shall I say? •^ Jack. (Taking both her hands playfully.) Tell her— tell her— Mrs. Darling enters from U. L. Mrs. Darling. Betty, whose motor is that at the door? (Sees the strange young man familiarly holding Betty's hand.) Well, what is all this? Betty. (At a perfect loss to know what to say.) Oh, mamma — is — is that you? Mrs. Darling. (Coming down stage, sternly.) It certainly is. (Glaring at Jack.) And who is this person, if you please? Jack. (Floundering, hut with an attempt to pass it off.) Who, I? „ ^ Mrs. Darling. Yes. BETTY'S LAST BET 47 Betty. (Pointing to Jack.) Who is this.^ ^, -^ Mrs. Darling. Exactly. Who is this.^ {Then with a sudden flash of inspiration.) No! It isn't — is it.'^ It is! {Rushing delightedly toward him and grabbing his hands. Jack and Betty are dumbfounded.) My dear Eddie ! How stupid of me ! But then, as I haven't seen you since you were a baby, it isn't sur- prising that I didn't know you. Jack. {Taken off his feet and dumb with astonishment.) Er — no, of course it isn't, is it.^^ Mrs. Darling. My dear boy, aren't you going to kiss your aunt.'^ Jack. {Immediately deciding to play the game and meet the situation.) You bet I am! {Throws his arms around her and kisses her.) ^ ^ . Betty. Goodness ! , r t-. Mrs. Darling. Why didn't you call me, Betty, and tell me that Eddie was lierc? _, Betty. Wliy, I was — {swallowing hard) I was just going to. ^ ^ Jack. Isn't this corking.? Mrs. Darling. {Happily excited.) Wait until I call the girls. They will be delighted. {She rushes up to door L., calling.) Girls, girls. 48 BETTY'S LAST BET Come and see who's here! {Disappears for a mo- ment or t-wo.) ^ ^ Jack. (Quickly, to Betty, down R. C.) Who am I? ' Betty. Mother's nephew, Edgar Darlmg, from Oberlin, ^hi«- Jack. (Repeating.) Mother's nephew, Edgar Darhng, from Oberhn, Ohio. Righto ! Plaj^ the game. Cousin Betty. Betty. You'll ^ei caue^ht. , ^ ^ Jack. What will you bet I don't get all your sisters en- ffaejed before I do.^ „ o o Betty. It can't be done. ^ Jack. What will you bet.? Betty. I'm off betting for good. Jack. One last bet. -r, Betty. I haven't any money to bet. Jack. Bet something else. Betty. What.? ^ Jack. I'll bet you three kisses, one for each sister. Betty. » Goodness ! ^ Jack. Are you game? Think of tlie poor girls. BE^rTY'S LAST BET 49 Betty. All right ; for their sakes, then. Mrs. Darling re-enters U. L., all smiles, with Peggy and Dolly following. Mrs. Darling. Come, girls. Here's your Cousin Eddie. Give him a royal welcome. Peggy and Dolly. (Together.) Oh, Cousin Eddie, I am glad to see you. How do you do. Cousin Eddie? (Mrs. Darling comes down L. Betty is at R. Jack is at C. Peggy comes down on his R. Dolly on his L.) Jack. Are these my cousins? ]\Irs. Darling. (Beaming.) Yes ; Peggy and Dolly. Jack. I must kiss my Cousin Peggy. (He does so.) And you, too, Cousin Doll}-. (Kisses Dolly; then with an arm around each of them.) I'm ever so glad I came. (The girls are delighted; ^Irs. Darling beaming, and Betty laughing.) Kitty appears at door R. Kitty. What's all the row about? Betty. Come on, Kitty. It's your turn. (Kitty comes down beside Peggy.) 50 BEir^ S LAST BET Peggy and Dolly. llei-o's Cousin Eddie. Kitty. {Ddighied.) Oh, how hnely ! ^ Jack. {Without letting the other girls go.) May I kiss you, Cousin Betty .f^ Mrs. Darling. Why, of course. (He takes a step forward and does so.) Jack. (With his arms full of girls.) Isn't this a lovely family party .^ (All appear to agree with this thoroughly except Betty, who now wears a little froimi, as if she has begun to feel that Jack is overdoing it a trifle.) Curtain. BETTY'S LAST BET The Second Act. Scene: The same. That afternoon. As the curtain rises sounds of laughter and talking come from off L. and a rattling noise norv and then of silver on the plates, etc. Betty runs in laughing, holding her napkin in her mouth as though to stifle her laughter. Slie throics herself on the sofa L. in a convulsion of merriment. She has pretended to be choking and coughing as she came in. Presently Peggy follozcs nith a glass of icater, looking concerned. Peggy. (At C.) Here, drink this, Betty. It will stop your cougli- ino^. (Going to sofa and offering it to Betty.) Betty. (Through her laughter.) I don't want it. I made an excuse to get away, that's all. Peggy. Well, I don't wonder you're laughing. Isn't Cousin Edgar amusing.? Betty. Oh, he's wonderful. Wonderful! Peggy. (Puts water on desk up L.) And so charming. He doesn't act a bit like a man 51 52 BETTY'S LASl^ BET who's going to be a professor of — of — oh, you know — digging up old things. Betty. Do jou mean archaeology.? Peggy. Yes, that's it. Betty. Is that Cousin Edgar's specialty.? Peggy. (Goes over and sits above Betty on sofa.) Yes, Aunt Katherine wrote and told mamma. He's going on a digging expedition to ancient Greece. Betty. (Thinking of Jack.) He ought to know^ that. Peggy. What did you say? Betty'. (Recovering herself.) I say he ought to knoAv his business. Peggy. I wish he could make us a longer visit. Betty. You're not getting a crush on him.? Peggy. No — but — (with a sigh) I sliall never love any- body. Betty. Here. Here. Here! (Turning Peggy toward her.) Have you a guilty secret, too.? Peggy. (With a gush of emotion.) Oh, Betty, if I tell you something, will you prom- ise to keep it a secret.? BETTY'S LAST BET 53 Betty. {Holding up her right hand.) Word of honor, word of honor, word of honor, amen ! „ Peggy. It's awfully hard to tell. Betty. What'll you bet I can't guess .^ You're in love. Peggy. How did you know.^^ Betty. Just a hunch when I saw you look like a dying calf. Who is it? Peggy. You'll never guess. Betty. I'll bet my silk umbrella against your flesh crepe blouse that I can. _ Peggy. No betting. „ ° Betty. It's— It's— It's— give up. Peggy, It's the Honorable Hamilton Moriarity. Betty. Goodness! {Hops over on the end of the sofa.) It sounds like the Ancient Order of Hibernians ! Peggy. He's the youngest member of the Legislature and a wonderful orator. _, Betty. (Sitting up again.) Where did i/ou ever hear him orate .^ Peggy. From the end of a train just before election last fall. 54 BETTY'S LAST BET Betty. Mj word! Rather a long distance acquaintance. Pkggv. Just the same he saw I liad on that screaminxr green hat, and he kept looking at me while he was speaking, oh so eloquently! And he kept on look- ing at me, and it gave me such a thrill. It was love at first sight. (She is looking very sentimental. Rises and s:oes C) ^ ^ Betty. {Looking at her and nodding.) I'll say it was. And you didn't meet him at all. Peggy. No, his train had to pull out for the next station. Betty. {Going over to Peggy, R. C.) What'U you bet he never knew you were alive ; you and your green hat.? Peggy. He did because he took a little bunch of pansies out of his buttonhole and threw them at me. {Pulling at a tiny chain, she brings up a locket from inside her blouse and opens it.) Look! I pressed a couple of them. They are in here! See.'^ Betty. Pansies for tlioughts. How romantic ! Peggy. {Ecstatically.) Oh, Betty. I think of him all the time. Betty. What's the good of wasting your time thinking of someone you'll never see again .^^ BETTY'S LAST BET 55 Peggy. How can I help it? Betty. Think of somebody else. Peggy. I can't. Oil, if you could onlj' hear him make a political speecli. _, Betty. What is he? A Democrat or a Republican? Peggy. I can't remember now. But when he speaks you feel that the other party is a worm. Betty. Does the family know? Peggy. No ; I haven't told a soul but you. Betty. Well, Peg, you might as well throw away those pansies. You can't hang on to a forlorn hope until the Honorable Moriarity campaigns for the next election. _, Peggy. Why not? Betty. Why, by that time he'll have forgotten you are on this planet. Xoise of several voices talking at once as Mrs. Darling, Jack, Kitty, Dolly and Percy eiiter from the clining room, L. Jack has Kitty on his R. and ^Irs. Darling on his L., his arm around each of them, Percy and Dolly bring up at the rear. Everybody is beaming. Apparently Jack has been making himself agreeable and entertaining. 56 BETTY'S LAST BET Jack. (As they come down C.) Now, aunty, confess that I don't look one bit as I did when you last saw me when I was five years old. Mrs. Darling. (Taking his shoulders and turning him toward her.) Yes — umm — yes ; there's a little expression — no, you don't look like either your mother or your father. _ Jack. Yes, queer, isn't it.? Still, I have their disposition. Mrs. Darling. Which.? Jack. Both — er — that is, I have my moods. Sometimes mother will say, "Now you're your father's own boy." And then when Dad's sore on me he'll say, "That's your mother all over again." Funny, isn't it.? (Betty bursts into a roar of laughter at this fib. Jack turns to her in mock surprise.) What are you laughing at, Elizabeth.? (Turning back to Mrs. Darling.) That one is Elizabeth, isn't it? Mrs. Darling. Yes, Betty for short. (Jack turns up C. where Betty is. Peggy is over R. of table. Percy has strolled over by the doorway and looks out on the porch. Dolly is down on her mother s L. but star- ing up at Percy, who turns now and then and catches her eye on him, but is unembarrassed and turns his eyes away immediately.) Mrs. Darling. (Beckons Kitty to come to her.) Kitty, is this the way to entertain Mr. Went- worth .? BETTY'S LAST BET 57 Kitty. (Verij softly to her mother.) I'd rather entertain Cousin Edgar. Peggy. ril entertain Cousin Eddie. Betty. (^Overhearing.) No, /'w going to entertain Cousin Ed. Mrs. Darling. Well, we can't all entertain Ned. Dolly.? (Turns and sees Dolly at her L. looking at Percy.) Dolly, come here. Dolly. (Coming to her.) Yes, mamma. _ _ _^ Mrs. Darling. (In a lower tone so that the others may not hear.) Stop staring at Mr. Wentworth. He'll think you're idiotic. ^ •^ Dolly. (With a spontaneous hurst of feeling.) Oh, mamma, he has such adorable eyes. Mrs. Darling. (Sternly.) Has he? Well, his adorable eyes are all for your sister Katherine. Y"ou had better remember that. He doesn't know that you are on earth. (Dolly turns up stage disconsolately. The other girls are hovering around Jack, R. C.) Jack. (Indicating Percy.) Who is this harmless youth crushed on.? ^^... Betty r/r?r7 Peggy. Kitty. 58 BETTY'S LAST BET Jack. {To Kitty.) What.? And you leave him flat Hke that! Here, now; take him right in the drawing room and — and — {faking- and fumbling for a word) — show him the family album! Kitty. {Pettishly.) Oh, the idea. ^ Jack. {In a loud voice to everybody os he tries to get rid of them.) All of you go with Mr. Wentworth into tlie draw- ing room. I know you want to see Kitty's pictures when she was a little girl. Percy. Yes, I should love to, but — Jack. Sure you do. You see, Mr. Wentworth, I am the head of the house today; the only man in the familj'. Percy. {Coming down to Mrs. Darling.) I suppose I should be going. My uncle was to come on the one o'clock train. He will wonder where I am. _ ^ ^ Mrs. Darling. Do stay a_ little longer. Kitty is so delighted to have you. We all are. It is so neighborly of you. The girls are all crazy to have 3^ou stay. {He looks around at them; they are perfectly mute, all eyes for Jack.) Aren't you delighted to have Mr. Went- worth with us, girls? {They all make assent.) Percy. It's — it's — so pleasant here, and it's so lonesome BETTY'S LAST BET 59 over at our big place. And — and — well, I will stay a little longer. Jack. (Coming over and slapping him on the shoulder.) That's right, old chap. Sta}^ as long as you like. We're all tickled to death. Aunty likes you. I'm strong for you. And the girls are crazy about you. {The girls shyly dissent from this; all hat Dolly.) Yes, they are; but they're ashamed to own it. Go right in the drawing room now and let them make a fuss over you. {Leading him to the parlor door.) Go in there and sit down and enjoy yourself. Have a ciejarette. „ ^ Percv. I — I don't smoke. ^ Jack. Oh, don't you.^ Well, then, just go in and sit down. Only go in. {Shoves Percy off R., then turns to Mrs. Darling and the girls.) Now, then, aunty, take the girls in there and all enjoy yourselves. {As they pass in order.) Go on, Dolly. Show him the picture of you when you were six months old, fat and bald. {Passes her in.) Peggy, you make her show it to him; and a few snapshots of you. {Passes her in.) Go on now. Cousin Kitty. Tell him a funny '^""''y- Kitty. {Hanging hack protestingly.) Butldon't^ Jack. {In her ear, passing her in.) Go on. The Wentworths are millionaires. {Turn- ing to Mrs. Darling.) Make her entertain him, aunty. {Shores the mother after them, gr(d)S the door knoh and shuts the door, holding it closed for a moment. Then leans up against it as if exhausted after all his fihhing.) Whew! 60 BETTY'S LAST BET Betty. (^Laughing appreciatively.) Well, that xcas clever. Jack. Talk about a strain ! If your mother asks me any more questions about my family, I shall cut and run. Betty. You've sidestepped very cleverly so far. Jack. Where do I live when I'm at home, Cousin Betty? Betty. Oh, my goodness, I've forgotten the place. Some- where in Ohio and you're an only child. Jack. {Repeating.) Somewhere in Ohio and I'm an only child. Betty. You can't keep this up. Jack. I shall keep it up until I win that bet. Betty. But if mother should catch you, and she's sure to. Jack. Leave aunty to me. Edgar Darling appears on the porch at the door. He is a small, serious young man, wearing dark clothes and horn spectacles and carries a suitcase and a bag, both large. He look's rather travel stained and his clothes need pressing. He knocks on the side of the doorway. They do not hear him. BETTY'S LAST BET 61 Betty. I nearly choked at the table, the way you fibbed your way through everything. (Edgar knocks again. They are so interested in each other that they pay no attention.) Jack. It did take a bit of nerve to deal with your moth- er's questions. „ ^ Betty. If she only guessed. Whew! (Edgar knocks again; still no attention.) Jack. What do you imagine she'd do if she knew.^ Have me arrested for obtaining a dinner under false pre- tences .'^ _, Betty. Of course. And she'd be perfectly right, too. We don't know a thing about you, you know. Even / don't. {Going ov€r L. C. to Jack.) Edgar. {Rather timidly, but in a good strong voice,) I beg your pardon ! Jack. {Turns and sees him.) Eh? „ Betty. What's that.^ ^ Edgar. {Coming into the room.) I don't suppose you heard me knock. Jack. {Suddenly serious.) No, we didn't. 62 BETTY'S LAST BET Betty. (To Jack.) Well, look who's here! Edgar. Is- this the residence of Mrs. DarHiiir? Jack and Betty. Who? Edgar. Mrs. DarHnff. _ Betty. (Grabbing Jack's arm and speaking low.) I have a horrible thought. Jack. (Same business.) So have I. (They look at Edgar, who is stand- ins' down R. C.) ^ ^ Betty. What is your name? Edgar. Edgar Pettingill Darling. Betty. (To Jack, significantly, meaning ''It is Cousin Edgar:') It is. Jack. Yes, isn't it? Edgar. (With a beaming smile at Betty.) Is this — can this be Cousin Elizabeth? (Betty is toa flabbergasted to know what to do.) Jack. (With a warning gesture.) Hush! (To Edgar.) Cousin EHzabcth? What do you mean by Cousin Elizabeth? Are you ad- dressing me? BETTY'S LAST BET 63 Edgar. No, no, of course not. I thought that this young hid}- might be my Cousin EHzabeth. Jack. {Trying to thinl: of something to say.) My dear friend. You — you — does she look like your Cousin Elizabeth.^ Edgar. Well, I can't say as to that. I've never seen her. Jack. {Going over to him.) But, my dear fellow, you can't go around but- ting into people's houses and claiming every young woman as your cousin. First thing you know you'll find yourself in trouble. Edgar. {Becoming alarmed.) I wonder if it is possible that I have taken the wrong; street.'* ^ Jack. You certainly have. Edgar. I am on my way to excavate one of the ancient buried cities of Greece, so I — Jack. Then you are entirely off the track. This town is dead, but it isn't buried yet. Edgar. No, I mean tliat I am sailing from New York the day after tomorrow, and I — {Putting down his lug- S'^S'-) Jack. {Interrupting.) Well, the boats don't leave from here. 64 BETTY'S LAST BET Edgar. (Getting more and more dazed and nervous at Jack's attitude.) I know, but I — Jack. Your mistake was in leaving New York. A little absent-minded, aren't you.^ Edgar. But mj mother wrote my Aunt Mary and Aunt Marj^ wrote my mother that if I would stop off and make her a visit — __ Jack. Visit ? Why, I thought you were going to excavate. Edgar. Well, I am, but — Jack. Don't you think it's going to be pretty hot work at this time of year? ^ •^ Edgar. Y^es, but — ^ Jack. Well, anyway, you have my good wishes. Good luck to you, old man. (Grabs his hand and shakes it; with the other he hands him one of his bags.) Edgar. But if I could see my Aunt ^lary — Jack. She'd be mighty proud of you, I'm sure. You ought to bring her a ruin or two as a souvenir. (Handing him his other piece of luggage.) Edgar. (Now thoroughly impatient and. losing his temper.) Say, look here, sir ! I want to see my Aunt Mary. Jack. I don't blame you. If I had an Aunt Mary I should want to see her, too. BETTY'S LAST BET 65 Edgar. ( Crossing him and speaking to Betty, zcho has taken refuge on th£ sofa and is trijing to keep a straight face.) Perhaps you will be kind enougli to tell me— Jack. Oh, that isn't your Aunt Mary. Edgar. (A?igriJf/ turning to him.) Will you kindl3^ mind 3^our business, sir! Jack. My business.^ What do you mean, my business .'' Edgar. I mean that I'm talking to this young lady. (Turning to Betty again.) Jack. Yes, but my dear fellow, 3'ou've never been in- troduced. Edgar. (To Betty.) I beg 30ur paixlon. My name is — Jack. Yes, Edgar Pettingill. We know. Edgar. (Turning to him, very much annoyed.) No, no. Darling. Darling! Jack. Please don't call me darling. I hate pet names. Edgar. I am speaking to this young lady. Jack. You musn't call her darling. It's too famihar. Betty. What is it, Mr. Pettingill? 66 BETTY'S LAST BET Edgar. {Correcting her.) Darlinff. _. ° Betty. I'm afraid jou will have to excuse me. Jack. {Taking his arm.) Mr. Pettingill, it is a matter of regret, but we shall have to ask 3^ou to leave. Edgar. But if vou would only — Jack. Did you see the motor car in front of the house.'' Edgar. Yes. Jack. {Veri/ gravel^/.) The owner is in this house. Betty. '{Nodding as if this were unusual.) Yes, that's true. ^ Jack. He is at this moment arranging certain family matters. I wouldn't advise you to interrupt. Edgar. But if you would only tell me — Jack. No, no. I'm not at liberty to betray family se- crets. T^ Edgar. But if jou would direct me. Jack. {Turning him up stage.) You take the road straight to your left and keep going. BETTY'S LAST BET 67 Edgar. But that leads to the station. Jack. Of course. You want the train back to New York, don't you.^ liiDGAR. But I don't want to leave without seeing Aunt Mary. t •^ Jack. Oh, she'll understand. Edgar. ( Turning at the door. ) I wonder if the station master would know any- thing about my aunt? Jack. He is a very peculiar man — takes very little in- terest in other people's affairs. I wouldn't bother him if I were you. ^^ Edgar. I know, but if — Jack. You wait for me at the station. I will come down and help you find your aunt. I have an idea that is the family that moved to Hartford last week. If I remember, Darling was the name. I'm sure you will find a Darling family in Hartford. {Getting him out on the porch.) Follow the road to the left. You can get a train for Hartford every half hour. Good-bye. Sorry you made such a mistake and wasted your valuable time. Good luck with your ruins. Ta, ta ! ( Waves his hand; then comes in ex- hausted.) Whew! Getting him off to ancient Greece is some job! Betty. But that is my real Cousin Edgar. This is awful. What if he comes back.^ 68 BETTY'S LAST BET Jack. He won't. I've got him so discouraged he'll be glad to go back to New York and wait for the boat. Betty. What if my mother finds out? Jack. If I'm to win my bet I'll have to take a chance. Betty. That motor of yours out in front will get mamma guessing. Jack. I don't care. I want those kisses. Betty. I don't believe 3'ou will ever win them. (Sits in chair L. of table.) Jack. Won't 1? Wait and see. Betty. Well, I'm waitino\ ' '^ Jack. (Comes down C. and L. of Betty.) Where are all the men, anyway.? Why, in a house like this with four pretty girls in it, there should be a waiting list. „ We are poor. That's our trouble. No man worth having wants to marry us. Jack. No man wants to marry anybody, if he's left to himself. -, Betty. Why do they, then? Jack. Why, the girl's father or brother or uncle or some male relative scares them into it. BETTY'S LAST BET 69 Betty. Oh, I don't believe that. Jack. When a fellow hears the words, "What are jour intentions toward our little girl," he weakens, and then it's Ta, ta, de duni ; dum de day. Da, day, de de, dum de da! (Sings first strains of the Men- delssohn Wedding March.) Betty. Really? ^ Jack. Sure ! That's what you need around here ; a male relative to bring them up to the scratch. Betty. (Rising.) We've first got to find the men. Jack. We've got one in there. And he would be easy. He's so shy I could scare him into anything. Betty. He's crazy about Kitty, but she won't look at a boy three years younger than herself. Jack. What's his name? I didn't catch it. Betty. Wentworth. Percy Wentwortli. Jack. Wentworth, Wentworth? No relation to Colonel Richard Wentworth of the National Guard? Betty. Percy is his nephew. ^ Jack. The poor fish ! Why, that's one of the wealthiest families in the State. 70 BETTY'S LAST BET Betty. They've just bought the old Robinson place on the other side of town. Ever since Percy saw the girls In church he has been crazy about Kitty. Jack. And she is cool to him.^ Betty. Ice. ^ Jack. I'll soon fix matters. Betty. (Going closer to him.) Mother will forgive you anything if you'll do that. Jack. I am a male member of the family and I — Betty. What? Jack. For the time being. Betty. Oh, that's better. Jack. And I'm going to win that bet, Betty. Betty. (Tauntingly.) Y e s, you are ! The parlor door opens and Kitty enters. Kitty. Why don't you two come in here.^* Jack. Percy doesn't want to see any more of us. Kitty. (Going up to the porch door.) What I want to know is who owns that big motor BETTY'S LAST BET 71 that's been standing in front of the house since be- fore lunch. j^^j, (Joining her.) I wonder. Betty ( Following. ) Yes, so do I. j^^j. (Innocently.) It must be Percy's. ,^ ^ Kitty. No, he says it isn't. See, tliere's his Httle run- about. Peggy enters from R., closing the door behind her. Peggy. Kitty, mamma wants to know what you are run- ning away for.? Kitty. (Coming down C.) I can't stand that stupid boy any longer. Besides, I want to get acquainted with Cousin Eddie. Peggy. (Going R.C.) Well, so do I. I'm not going to stay in there. Percy Wentworth didn't come to see me, anyway. Jack. (Coming down R.) I'm very flattered; but what's the matter with Percy.? He looks like a very worthy 3^outh to me. Kitty. Who cares about worthiness? All he can do is to blush and stammer Y'^es or No. Mother has had to do all the talking in there. Jack. Yes, but think of the Wentworth money. Mrs. 72 BETTY'S LAST BET Percy Wentworth will be able to wear imported gowns and spend the winLers in Palm Beach. Betty. (Listening over K.) Mother is calling jou, Kitty. The parlor door opens and Mrs. Darling enters, closing the door behind her. Mrs. Darling. (Heatedly.) What in the world is keeping you all.'^ Kitty, I'm ashamed of you. „ -^ Betty. So am I, mother. She's treating that poor chap ^^l^ly- Jack. (Gravely shaking his head.) It's a pity. And I'm afraid my Cousin Kitty is losing the greatest chance of her life. Mrs. Darling. Exactly what I say ! (Crossing to sofa L. where Jack joins her. Betty is up L. C. Peggy near table R. C.) Jack. Aunty, we must bring this girl to reason. (He sits above Mrs. Darling on the sofa.) Mrs. Darling. It's high time. Peggy, what are you hanging around for? Go out into the kitchen and help Hannah. p^^^Y. (Pouting.) Oh, mamma! ^^^^ Darling. (Sternly.) Do as I bid you ! (Pkggy goes out L. reluctantly.) BETTY'S LAST BET 73 You can see, Edgar, what a trial my life is with four stubborn, self-willed girls. Jack. {Pretending great sympathy.) Yes, indeed, aunty. I can see what you are up against. I'm amazed at Katherine. Here is a per- fectly good rich young man hanging around her, and she doesn't even give him so much as a pleasant look. (Kitty is sulking down R. C. Betty, up near the desk, is highly amused.) Mrs. Darling. (To Kitty.) Do you hear that. Miss.? Kitty. Yes, but Edgar is going to Greece. What does it matter to him whether I am satisfied or not.'^ Mrs. Darling. Satisfied.? If you think that after you are mar- ried you wiilbe satisfied with any man, you are very much mistaken. Kitty. I'd be willing to be miserable with some one I loved; some one who was my ideal. (Jack and Mrs. Darling exchange whispers.) Betty. This chap is so young you can train him to be your ideal. •^ Kitty. Thank you, that's too big a job. ' Jack. (With a wink at Betty, he rises and goes L. C.) Katherine, as the only male representative of the family, I shall now speak very seriously to you. 74 BETTY'S LAST BET Betty. Listen now, Kitty. _ Kitty. (Pouting.) Well, go ahead. I'm listening. Jack. Ideal men don't grow on every bush. Neither do rich suitors. I suppose what you want is a master- KlTTY. ful man.? Of course Jack. (In an oratorical manner.) Which means that he will rule the roost; that you will be a slave instead of a queen. If you marry this modest youth, your will will be law. You will have beautiful gowns, smart motor cars and a magnificent home. And then, Katherine, look what you can do for your sisters. ^^^^ Darling. (Beginning to weep.) Yes, your poor little sisters. Kitty. (Much impressed hy this appeal, and winking hack lier own tears.) I do want to help the girls : but I'd rather be poor all my life than marry some one I don't love. Jack. Bett}^, I hope you will never be as selfish as" your sister. „ Betty. Try to love him, Kitty. Mrs. DarlIng. (Sniffling in her handkerchief.) She won't listen to you, Edgar. The chance of her life, and she turns up her nose at it. BETTY'S LAST BET 75 Kitty. (Getting angry now.) You're all taking a lot for granted. He's never proposed to nie. , ^ ^ Mrs. Darling. Because yow don't give him any encouragement. Jack. Exactly! Why don't you lead him on.^ Kitty. I don't want to. Anyway, he's such a boy he doesn't know his own mind. Jack. Ah, then you should know it for him. {Going ox^er and putting his arm around her playfully.) With such pretty eyes as yours, Kitty, you should be able to lead a man on. Kitty. (Flirting a bit with those eyes.) Well, if he were like you, and — Betty. (Not pleased at the picture she interrupts as she comes down.) Come on, come on, get on with the war. Mrs. Darling. (Taken up with her own troubles.) When I think of all the years of pinching and scrimping, and now — (Breaks down and buries her face in her handkerchief .) Kitty. I do want to help, mamma, but he is such a ninny. Jack. Believe me, a rich ninny is not to be sneezed at. 76 BETTY'S LAST BET Kitty. Well, even if I could make up my mind to marry him, he would never come to the point. He hasn't got spunk enough. I'll get his spunk up. All. How.? Jack. Don't you know how? Kitty. No. _ Hetty. Mrs. Darling. Yes, for goodness sake, tell us. Jack. Make him jealous. All. Jealous ? Jack. Yes. No man is thinking seriously of marriage until he gets a few twinges of jealousy. He may be impressed with a girl ; fond of her ; in love with her. But he won't get beyond the flirting stage un- less you arouse his jealousy of a rival. Kitty. Who would Perc}^ Went worth be jealous of in this dead old town.? ^ Jack. (A little stumped, but a bright idea coming.) Why — er — er — of — Of me ! All. Of you.? Betty. (A little hurt at this idea.) Do you mean to say that 2/ou want to marry Kitty.? BETTY'S LAST BET // Jack. (Gallantly.) I can think of nothing that would give me more happiness. B^^^y. (Miffed.) Well, the idea! Jack. In fact, I'd like to move to Salt Lake City and marry all four of you. But I have to think of my excavations. I'm wedded to my ruins. Kitty. I don't get the point. Betty. Neither do I. _ . „ Mrs. Darxixg. I'm a little bit in the dark too, Edgar. Jack. Why, the thing to do is to let Percy think that I am madly in love with Kitty, and that I have come liere from — from — ( Floundering. ) Betty. (On his L.) From Ohio. j^^^ (Catching the word.) From Ohio — I have come from Ohio ; interrupted my journey to Italy — Betty. To Greece. ^ Jack. Yes, yes, I mean Greece, of course. Interrupted my journey to Greece in order to propose. You must tell him that I — Wait ! He might overhear us. We had better discuss this a little further from that parlor. 78 BETTY'S LAST BET Mrs. Darling. {Rising and going to the door U. L.) Come upstairs to my room. Jack. {Following.) Righto ! Come on, Kitty. You too, Betty. This is a family conference. Betty. A family conference? Shall I call Peggy and JOolly.? ,, ^ Mrs. Darling. Peggy's busy. j^^^ And Dolly's doing her bit holding down the ninny. Come on, aunty. We'll settle Percy's liash, and all live happily ever after. {Exits with his arm around Mrs. Darling.) _. Betty. Isn't he wonderful? Kitty. {With a little determined air.) He certainly is. And I am going to profit by his advice one way or another. {She runs out U. L.) Betty. {Thoughtfully.) "One way or another?" I wonder what she meant by that? Oh, this is a scream! Betty runs after Kitty laughing, and almost collides with Peggy, who is entering from U. L. wear- ing a kitchen apron. Peggy. Where are you all going? Betty. Up in mamma's room. Cousin Edgar is calling a BETTY'S LAST BET 79 meeting of the Matrimonial Committee. You keep your eye on Dolly and Percy. {Runs out U. L.) Peggy. {Aggrieved.) Well, I like that! I'm going to strike. {Tears off apron, tosses it in the closet down L. and is run- ning up to follotc the family, when there is a knock at the door of the porch.) It is Hamilton Moriarity, looking very hand- some and stunning. Peggy stops. Hamilton. I beg your pardon, but I wondered if I could in- quire if — (Peggy has come to the door and they rec- ognize each other. He breaks off.) You! -, Peggy. Y^ou! {They stare for a moment, then he recovers first.) Hamilton. Is it possible that you are the — Peggy. Yes, I am. And you.^ Hamilton. Y^es, I'm the man. X EGGY. I mean you're the one who made that beautiful speech last fall at the station .^^ Hamilton. Was it beautiful? It should have been. For I was thinking of you every moment. Peggy. {Delightedly.) No, not really? 80 BETTY'S LAST BET Hamilton. Or rather 1 was thinking of that Httle green hat. Peggy. {Disappointedly.) ^"* Hamilton. {Gallantly.) And of course the pretty face under it. Peggy. Won't you come in.^ Hamilton. {Coming into the room.) Thank you. -^ •^ Peggy. {Feeling rather shy, hut happy.) Won't — won't you sit down.? {Indicates chair L. of table.) T-T ' ^ Hamilton. Thank you. {He pulls the chair out and turns it facing her as she sits on the sofa.) Peggy. It's — it's funny that you should happen to be in our little town again. Are you going to make an- other speech? -._. Hamilton. No, I won't have to make any more speeches here until I ask the folks to vote for me again. Peggy. But you do speak in the State House.? Hamilton. Oh, yes, when the other fellows let me. Peggy. I expect you put them all in the shade. Hamilton. Well, I don't know about that. I haven't blown BETTY'S LAST BET 81 the rest of them off the map with my eloquence yet. It isn't politics that brings me to Stockbriclge today. I came to see Colonel Richard Wentworth. Peggy. Oh, he doesn't live here. Hamilton. No. »But I believe his nephew is here, and I thought he might give me the information I am lookin^c for. _, '^ Peggy. Yes, he is here — this afternoon. Hamilton. His man gave me to understand that he is a very frequent visitor here. Peggy. Yes, he is. Hamilton. Well, I don't blame him ; especially If he has ever seen you as / saw you In that pretty green hat. Peggy. ( Quickly. ) Oh, he doesn't come to see me. Hamilton. What's the matter with him.?^ Is he blind .^ Peggy. You are Irish, aren't you.^ Hamilton. There's no blarney in that. Peggy. Shall I call Mr. Percy Wentworth.? He's in the parlor. (Rising and starting to cross to R.) Hamilton. (Also rising and intercepting her.) No, wait. I'm in no liurry now. I'd rather talk 82 BEirY'S LAST BET to jou. I wonder if you knew that I threw a bunch of pansies at your feet as my train pulled out that •^' Peggy. Yes, I thought perhaps you meant them for me. Hamilton. I hoped they would keep me in your mind until they withered. ^ Peggy. (Unconsciously clasping the locket.) No, I — I kept them. Hamilton. (Looking at her ardently.) You little ans;el ! _, ^ Peggy. (Pleased but a little embarrassed at his boldness.) Won't you sit down again? Pll call my mother. Hamilton. I'll meet your mother later. What do you say to jumping in my^ car and taking a spin? (Going to the door.) _, Peggy. Splendid! I'll get my hat. Hamilton. Never mind your hat; just as you are. Peggy. (Excitedly.) Oh, all right. (Peggy and Hamilton go out C. D. laughing and chatting.) Presently Hannah enters with a tray containing a pitcher of lemonade and glasses. She marches across to the parlor door and stands in front of it, callings BETTY'S LAST BET 83 Hannah. Miss Dolly! Miss Dolly! Dolly comes to the door in (t moment. Dolly. {Coming out and closing door behind her.) What is it, Hannah .^^ Hannah. .Miss Peggy told me to bring the young man some more lemonade. Though why he should be guzzling so soon after lunch 7 don't see. Where's the rest of the family? -r^ Dolly. ^ I don't know. Hannah. What are you doing in there talking to Miss Kitty's beau.? ^ *^ Dolly. Oh, Hannah, we're looking at the photographs. He doesn't think I'm fat. Isn't that wonderful.? Hannah. Do 3'ou mean that you've got that little clam shell to open his mouth.? ^ Dolly. Well, he doesn't talk much. But he's so interest- ^ Hannah. When I was serving the luncheon I thought he was deef and dumb. ^ Dolly. {Reprovingly.) Oh, Hannah ! Hannah. Tliat's a man for 3^ou ! Either they won't let you get a word in edgeways, or they're about as chatty as a bump on a log. 84 BETTY'S LAST BET DoLi.y. (Taking the tray.) Give me that lemonade. I think you're horrid. Hannah. (Opening the door for her.) What are you doing; getting mashed on your sister's beau? ^ Dolly. Sshh! He'll hear you! (She exits R. D. with lemonade. Hannah closes the door after her.) Hannah. (Muttering to herself, starts for L.) Ci-ftzy over the men. The girls are all alike. (Glances up through the door out beyond and stops.) Well, my land of love! Who's that Miss Peggy's going off with in an otty mobile.^ And two more cars in front of the house. Folks'll think we're hav- ing a county fair here. (Starting off L.) Never saw such an upsetting day in my life ! Men, men, all over the place. (Noise of Kitty's voice heard off L.) Now what.? Kitty, running in from L. and almost colliding with Hannah, catches her by the arms and turns her around. Kitty. Look out, Hannah! Look out! There's someone passing. I want to see him. Hannah. My sakes alive, what are you doing.? I never in all my born days! (She goes out in a fluster, L.) (Kitty starts toward the outer door. Then, realizing that someone is entering the porch, she stops and retreats a step or two and recovers herself.) BETTY'S LAST BET 85 Richard Wentworth enters the porch and knocks at the door casing. He is thirty-five, good looking and dressed in the uniform of a Colonel of Infantry of the National Guard. Richard. I beg your pardon ! KiTxr. {Laboring under great excitement and considerable emotion.) Will you come in? {She smiles at him rather fa- miliarly. ) „ ^ Richard. Thank you. {He comes into the room and recog- nizes her.) No, it isn't — Yes, it is! Kitty. Have you come for your Sonnets from the Portu- guese ? ^ Richard. Not at all. I came to make an inquir^^, and here I find you ! My goddess of the barbed wire. Kitty. Won't you sit down.^ Richard. Thank you. {She goes to the sofa and motions him to the chair R. of table.) Just think of finding you again like this. I don't suppose I can flatter myself that you have given me two thoughts since our meeting in the woods that day.? Kitty. Oh yes, I'm sure I've given you two. Richard. But not more than that. 86 BETTY'S LAST BET Kitty. I'm not good at arithmetic. I see you are in uni- form. I never dreamed that you were an army man. Richard. The National Guard. We are going into summer camp, and I've managed to influence the powers that be to hold it near Stockbridge here. Kitty. Oh, that will wake things up. Sonnets and war are your studies.'^ _, -^ Richard. My diversions. Have you read the Browning sonnets.? ___ Kitty. Yes, they are beautiful. Richard. Do you remember the one — "The face of all the world is changed, I think, Since I first heard the footsteps of your soul".? Kitty. (Rapturously.) Yes, that is my favorite. Richard. (Delighted.) Mine, too. (Hitches his chair nearer the sofa.) Do — do you believe in love at first sight ? Kitty. Why do you ask.? _ -^ *^ Richard. Because, / do. _^ Kitty. But you're a flirt. ^ Richard. What makes you say that.? BETTY'S LAST BET 87 Kitty. The}^ say that all soldiers are. Is it the uniform that does it? -r, KlCHARD. That's all nonsense. I'm not a flirt. Kitty. Oh, but you are. -^ Richard. I've never flirted with you. Kitty. Then what would you call our first meeting.? Richard. Romance. Kitty. It meant nothing to you. Richard. What makes you say that? {Hitching his chair still nearer.) ^^ Kitty. Because you never took the pains to find out who Richard. Well, I was called back to New York and — How do I know that you took pains to find out who / am? Kitty. I don't know who you are. Richard. Fifty-fifty! Why not call it quits? Kitty. Just what I say ; you're a flirt. Richard. I have thought of you so many times that I made up my mind to look you up as soon as I came down. Kitty. You will never convince me you have given me BETTY'S LAST BET two thoughts. Besides, for all I know you may be a married man. Richard. No, I'm a hopeless bachelor. Kitty. Hopeless ? ^ HlCHARD. Yes, in our family we specialize in bachelors. Kitty. {Sarcastically.) Oh, do you.^ In spite of your sonnet reading, and all that.? KiCHARD. Surely you know that all bachelors aren't women haters, any more than all husbands are lovers. Kitty. (^Rising as if to dismiss him.) I believe you said you called on an errand. Richard. {Rising.) Yes, as I was passing the house I saw my nephew's runabout outside. I should like to speak to him. Kitty. {Astonished.) Do you mean that Percy Wentworth is your nephew.? _ Richard. Yes, of course. „ Kitty. But you are so young. Richard. ( Laughing. ) Yes, his father was the eldest and I was the young- est of the family. However, I'm old enough to handle Percy. BETTY'S LAST BET 89 Kitty. Then you are Richard Wentworth? You Hve on the Robinson place ! It was your barbed wire I was cauffht on ! _^ Richard. Exactly. I bought the place for a summer home as it was near the new rifle range. Kitty. {Dropping into her chair again.) Oh, how stupid I've been ! Richard. (Reseating himself.) Not at all. It Avas delightful to meet my little neighbor in such an unconventional way. Kitty. But your nephew? Richard. I shall pack him back to the city with a tutor. He's a very backward student and he's been wasting a lot of precious time down here this summer. I'm trying to get him through Columbia, though it's a hopeless job, I'm afraid. Kitty. It happens tliat he's calling here now. Richard. That's what I thought when I saw his car. I'm going to confide in you. His valet tells me that he has fallen into the clutches of a very designing woman liere in Stockbridge. ^^ IVITTY. He has.f* It's a wonder I haven't heard of it. Richard. It seems she is a great deal older than he. I must put a stop to it before she kidnaps him. QO BETTY'S LAST BET Kitty. {Mentally putting two and two together ^ and get- ting more and more indignant.) Yes, I woidd, if I were you. {She rises, quite fu- rious now.) The sooner you send him •away from Stockbridge the better. Richard. {Rising and not observing her anger.) I wonder if by chance you know who this cradle snatcher is that he is so mad over.^ KiTT.Y. Cradle snatcher? -^ KiCHAllD. Her name, I believe, is Miss Katherine Darling. Kitty. I do know her. _, Richard. Good ! Then I wish you would tell me sometliing about her. „ Kitty. / am Katherine Darling. Richard, {Staggerea.) No! ^ Kitty. ^^^- Richard. {Stammering .) B— b — but — Kitty. ( With flashing eyes, ) I am the cradle snatcher. Richard. B — b^ — ^b — but 3^ou — Kitty. I am the elderly kidnapper who is trying to steal your precious nephew. BETTY'S LAST BET 91 Richard. {Horrified at zchaf he has got himself into.) But my dear Miss — Oh, good Lord! Kitty. Mr. Percy WentNvorth has been a horrible bore and a perfect nuisance to me, though the rest of the family seem to like him. He's the sort of idiot that can never take a hint, and doesn't know when he's snubbed. I wouldn't have liim if he were a hundred times as rich and the last man on earth, and the sooner you ship him off to New York again the bet- ter I shall be pleased. {Marches up stage to the doorway and looks out.) Richard. (In the dust at the mess he has made of everything, follows her up humbly.) But my dear Miss Darling, there has been a hor- rible mistake. Kitty. I should think there had. Richard. It's all the fault of that valet. The man is an infamous liar. I'll make Percy discharge him. I — I — what can I say.'' My nephew isn't worth your beautiful little finger Take him away ! Kitty. (Waving her hand.) Richard. Indeed, I beg 3^our pardon a thousand times for my mistake. Kitty. I'll call him. (Starts down R. for parlor door.) 92 BETTY'S LAST BET Richard. (Grasping her hand and detaining her C.) Wait! Don't go! I've been an idiot! Kitty. That's perfectly true. But you can go, and take your sonnets with you. ( With her free hand she takes the little book of sonnets from one of the pock- ets of her dress and offers it to him over her left shoulder. He still has her left hand.) Richard. Keep them. Throw them away. But do forgive my stupidity. I don't blame Percy or any man for falling in love with you. How could he help it.^ Kitty. {Turning and looking squarely at him.) It is a very good thing for you that my family doesn't know how I've been insulted. Richard. But I never dreamed. I wouldn't have made that remark if I had known. Kitty. {With a sudden inspiration.) Please let go my hand. What if my Cousin Edgar sliould see you.^ _. Richard. {Annoyed and a little jealous.) Why should I give a whoop for your Cousin Edffar.? ^ Kitty. I don't know what he would do if he saw you hold- ing my hand. Richard. What is it to him.? BETTY'S LAST BET 93 Kitty. He is a jealous fiend. He is ready to kill your nephew. _^ Richard. {Experiencing a pang of jealousy.) Do you mean to say that you are engaged to your cousin ? ^^ Kitty. {Lying beautifully.) There's a sort of understanding. But I'm afraid I don't love him as I should to marry him. That is, not as I could love. ^ KiCHARD. ( With a bit of desperation,) Katherine, listen to me. , Kitty. (Excitedly.) Shh ! Please go. I hear Edgar coming. And he is so violent. ^^ Richard. (Kissing her hand.) Let him come. „ Kitty. (Acting frightened.) No, no, he might injure you. Richard. ( Recklessly. ) Let him — if it is for you. Kitty. (Trying to pull him toward the door up C.) No, no ! Do go ! ^ Richard. I won't go until I've had a chance to talk things over with you. Kitty. Oh, please, please! Don't run the risk of meet- ing him. 94 BETTY'S LAST BET Richard. (Now excited and losing his head.) Where can I wait? _.^ Kitty. (Pointing to the parlor. He starts.) In there with jour nephew\ Richard. (Stopping.) No, no. I don't want to meet him. No. Kitty. Oh, dear. Edgar will see you! Richard. (Starting up L.) In here, then. Kitty. ( A Imost screaming. ) No, no. You'll meet Edgar. Richard. (Rushing down to door lower L.) How about this? __ Kitty. That's only a closet. Richard. It will hold me until you can get rid of your cousin. Kitty. (Terribly excited but also amused at the situation.) Oh, dear. Don't let him find you! Richard. (Throwing her a kiss with his right hand and open- ing the door with his left.) You are adorable ! ^^ Kitty. Oh, don't let him liear you ! BETTY'S LAST BET 95 Richard. (Going into the closet but looking out.) Will you forgive my horrible mistake? Kitty. Yes, yes! (Closes the door after him, leans against it and laughs silently. She then runs up and is about to go off U. L. zahen Jack enters.) Jack. Oh, here you are ! ^1^,^^ (Finger to her lips.) Hush! Come over here! (Takes his arm and leads him over down R.) j^ck (In a lower tone.) Where is he? (She points to the closet door.) In there? (She nods.) What is it, a sitting room? Kitty. No, a closet. He's hiding from you. Jack. Did you scare him? Kitty. I tried to. , Jack. Poor kid ! Where's Dolly? Kitty. In the parlor. ^ Jack. Have you made him jealous? Kitty. I tried to. I told him we were engaged; that you were a jealous fiend, and that I was afraid you would kill him. _. Jack. He must have thought I had grown suddenly jealous since luncheon. Poor Percy! Now let us 96 BETTY'S LAST BET see if mj scheme works. If this doesn't bring him to the point of proposing, I don't know what will. Kitty. What do we do now.^ Jack. I shall terrify you, threaten you, and if he has the heart of a man he will come out and offer to knock my block off. Kitty. All right; go on and terrify me. Jack. (Striding over toward the closet door.) Are you ready? -^ ^ Kitty. Yes. Be sure that he hears you. Jack. (Standing close to the closet and facing it when he speaks to Kitty, who stands just behind him.) Kitty, I am not going to stand for your trifling any longer. (Turning his head over his shoulder and whispering.) Answer, answer. Kitty. ( Whispering.) What shall I say.? , Jack. (Loudly at the door.) Ha, you'd better blush. I should think you would change color after the way you've been going on with that Wentworth fellow. Kitty. Oh, Edgar, please don't have one of your jealous fits again. I give you my word he has never tried to make love to me. BETTY'S LAST BET 97 Jack. {Over his shoulder.) Good! {Facing door again.) Do jou tliink I believe you? You torture me with your flirtations with that milksop. When I see you laughing and talking and smiling at him I sec red. Something hursts in my brain and I want to kill — yes, kill! Kitty. Oh, Edgar, don't give way to one of your rages, I^^^^«^- Jack. {Shouting at the door.) Don't argue with me. You make me feel I could })ut my fingers round your beautiful white throat and choke you ! kiTTY. {Screaming; but .standing perfectly/ still behind him.) Oh, Edgar. Don't, don't! {There is a noise of falling glass in the pantry.) Jack. So, you have got your other lover in the closet. Now I know you are faithless. Dolly and Percy run in from the parlor. Dolly. What is all the noise about.? Percy. Has — has something happened.? {He has the fam- ilij album in one hand and a glass of lemonade partly consumed in the other.) Jack. {Turning in aviazement at the sound of Percy's voice.) What are you doing there? 98 BETTY'S LAST BET Mrs. DARLrxG comes on from L. with Betty. ]Ml{S. DxVllI.ING. What in the world? Bktty. Mj' goodness, it's working ! Hannah folloics them in. HANNAIt. Mv land of love, is somebody gettin' killed.^ Jack. Kitty, what are you up to? Kitty. Won't 3'Ou all please go away? Mrs. Darling. I want to know what this is all about? Betty. (To Jack C. He is hetxveen Betty R. C. and Mrs. Darling L. C.) Is the scheme working? Jack. I thought Percy was in that closet, but he is there. (Pointins;.) ^ positions. Dolly Percy Betty Jack Mrs. D. Kitty ,,,, , . ., ., Mrs. Darling. What IS it? {From this point to the curtain the cues must be picked up quickly, and the dialogue go very fast.) Jack. Someone is in that closet. I heard him. Hannah. It's a burglar. (The women scream.) BETTY'S LAST BET 99 Jack. Have you got a gun? Kitty. (Nozc thoroughly frightened.) Don't shoot. Please don't shoot! Jack. Percy, have you got a gun on you.'' Percy. No, I never shoot. Jack. Who's got a gun.^ I'll get him out of there. Who's got a gun.f^ {^He turns to them.) Betty". {Who has been watching the door of the closet.) Look, the handle turned! Kitty. All of you go away. (Steps away from the door.) XT > • .1 Betty. He s coming out ! (Hannah, Dolly and Mrs. Darling scream. Dolly hides behind Percy', who is frightened.) Kitty. (Shrinking away up above the door.) This is awful! The door is flung open and Richard strides out. Everybody exclaims in astonishment. PERCY^ ( Thunderstruck. ) Uncle Dick! j^^^ (Blinking.) What the deuce ! _ Betty. That isn't a burglar. 100 BETTY'S LAST BET Hannah. Nice ffoinffs on ! ^^ ^ ^ Dolly. (To Percy.) Is it your uncle.? Mrs. Darling. What are you doing in my preserve .closet, sir? (She is facing him.) Kitty. Let me explain, mamma. {Coming down beside Richard, L.) ,_ -^ ' Mrs. Darling. Be quiet, Miss ! _ Richard. Madam, I offer you my humble apologies. Mrs. Darling. How did you get in my closet, sir.? Betty. Yes, what are you doing in our jam.? Kitty. Betty, will you keep quiet.? Jack. As the head of the family, I want an explanation. Richard. ( With a ferocious look at Jack.) I don't know what you w^ant, but what you will get is for you to say. I'll meet you outside and we can settle matters with or without gloves. Jack*. I don't know you, but I'm at your service. Richard. {To Mrs. Darling.) Madam, if you peraiit your daughter to marry that fellow, you will be committing a crime. BETTY'S LAST BET 101 Kitty. Never, never, I will never marrj^ Edgar! Mrs. Darling. Kitty, who is this man.? Do you know him.? Kitty. Yes Richard. My name is Richard Wentworth, madam, and if I liave compromised your daughter, I — Jack. You have. _, Betty. Yes, he has, mannna. Richard. I was going to say, madam, I wish to ask your daughter to consider me as a rival to this bully. I want to make her Mrs. Richard Wentworth if she will have me. Kitty. {Overcome with joy.) ^^^' Percy. {Remonstrating.) Oh, uncle! -r» Richard. It was love at first sight, and I never realized it until I was in that closet. {Turning to Kitty.) What do you say? ■^ -^ Kitty. What do you say, mamma.? Mrs. Darlixg. What do you say, Edgar.? Jack. What do you say, Betty.? , Betty. I say yes! 102 BEITY'S LAST BET Jack. We saj — Betty, Jack, Kitty, Dolly, Mrs. D. and Hannah. {All shout together.) KiCHARD. Your cousin doesn't seem to take it very hard. Kitty. He's crazy, anyway. . (Mrs. Darling is shaking hands with Richard and kissing Kitty.) Jl ercy. (To Dolly.) He's stolon my o'irl. ^ •^ ^ Jack. (To Betty, as he raises his light arm with extended forefinger.) One! ^ Positions. Hannah. (Up L. C.) Dolly. Percy. Betty. Jack. (Down R.) (Down C.) Mrs. Darling. Richard. Kitty. (Down L.) Curtain. BETTY'S LAST BET The Third Act. Scene: The same. An hour later. As the curtain rises Hannah with a tray of glasses is standing L. C. and talking to Mrs. Darling, who is in the closet. Dolly and Percy are sit- ting in chairs out on the porch. Hannah. No, ma'am. What I say is, take a good long time to look a man over before you get up before a min- ister and swear to do all those things you hate like pison after you been married a while. (A short pause.) I think that for Miss Kitty to be engaged to a man that pops into her life like a jumping jack is taking awful chances. Mrs. Darling enters from the closet with two bot- tles of some sort of home hrew. Mrs. Darling. {Paying no attention to Hannah's grumblings.) I think this dandelion wine will be just the thing to celebrate the engagement with. Hannah. Lord knows it was work enough digging up the blamed things and brewing it. I hate to see it all guzzled up by a parcel of men that none of us ever saw before. __ ^ Mrs. Darling. Do stop your croaking, Hannah. It is simply marvelous that little Edgar, who was such a plain 103 104 BETTY'S LAST BEl^ child, should have turned out so charming and clever. And that a rich and important man like Colonel Wentworth should have met Katherine in such a romantic way. Hannah. Romantic way.^ Shucks! I don't see — Mrs. Darling. (Wiping off the bottles.) Of course you haven't lieard about it. I hadn't until just now. It was all on account of a barbed wire fence and love at first sight. (Putting bottles on the tray.) __ "^ ^ Hannah. I don't see what barbed wire has got to do with this here love at first sight. Love, my eye ! Mrs. Darling. (Pushing Hannah's arm to get her to move. TJieij go R. C.) Go on in now, Hannah, and put the tray on the little stand. We'll drink to tlie engagement. Yes, that's right ; the small glasses. It's rather strong. I guess one bottle w^ill be enough. (Takes other bottle off tray and staiicls it on table.) Hannah. (Going up to parlor door.) I should say so. All I hope is that Miss Kitty don't regret it all her born days. (Exits grumbling into parlor R.) ^, -^ Mrs. Darling. (Goes up to the porch door.) Come, Dolly, and you, too, Percy. We are going to drink to your uncle's and Kitty's engagement. (Leaves door and goes into parlor.) BETTY'S LAST BET 105 Dolly enters, followed hy Percy, who has been crying. Dolly. Come on in, Percy. We'll have to go in the par- Percy. I'm not going in there. Do you think I'm going to let Uncle Dick gloat over me.? Dolly. My goodness, wliy do you let them see that you care ? -p, Percy. I can't help it. {He is down R. C, she is L. C.) Dolly. Kitty never really encouraged you, did she.? Percy. (Drops into chair and xveeps in his handkerchief.) , No, but your mother did. Dolly. Well, mothers arc like that. Especially where men are as scarce as they are here. I don't suppose Kitty thought you were really in earnest. Percy. In earnest.? Why, I wish you could see the way my appetite fell off. I couldn't take any interest in anything, and I got so I only shaved every other Dolly. {Going over and putting her hand on his shoulder.) I'm sorry you take it so hard. Percy. {Really furious.) I've a good mind to go in there and make a fuss. What if I'd stolen his girl like this.? 106 BETTY'S LAST BET Dolly. Oh, don't do that. It wouldn't help you. It wouldn't change Kitty's feelings. Percy. I wasn't thinking of her. It's my dignity that's been insulted. A man can't stand for that, you know. ^ Dolly. Yes, but he's your uncle. How can you stand on your dignity with him.^ Percy. (Blubbering.) You bet if he was a stranger I'd go in there and punch his face. - ^ Dolly. Is Kitty the only girl you ever loved .'^ Percy. I should say not. I've been in love about five times now. Turned out wrong every time, too. Dolly. (Disappointedly^.) Oh, you must be horribly fickle. (Goes over L.) Percy. I wouldn't be if I could only get married. But Uncle Dick has stood in the way every time. Dolly. Why? p^^er. (Furiously and rising.) He says I'm too young. Isn't that a scream.? Dolly. Well, you aren't of age yet. Percy. But you don't have to be of age to fall in love. BETTY'S LAST BET 107 Dolly. (Casting sheep's eyes at him.) I shouldn't think you'd want to marry a girl older than you. _, ^ Percy. What difference does that make.? Dolly. I suppose we've got to go in there. Percy. If I go in there, I shall have to stand on my dig- nity and make them ashamed of the way they've treated mc. „ Dolly. Well, then, go ahead. Percy. I — I — I don't know what to say. Dolly. Come on into the garden and think of something. Percy. All right, you help me. ( Wiping the traces of tears from his face with his handkerchief. He catches sight of the bottle.) What's that? Dolly. A bottle of mother's dandelion wine. Percy. Let's drink to my revenge. (Picks up the bottle.) Dolly. It makes me dizzy. Oh, Percy, I hope you're not a drunkard ! ^ Percy. Would you care if I were.? Dolly. (Shylz/.) Yes, indeed, I would! 108 BETTY'S LAST BET Percy. (Earnestly.) I only take to liquor when I'm desperate. Dolly. (Reaching for the bottle.) Oh, Percy, I thmk you'd better not have it. Percy. (Retaining it.) Yes, I had ! And anywa^^, I've got another reason for drinking today. ^^ What.? Percy. I hate to tell you. Dolly. Oh, come on, do ! „ Percy. You won't despise mc? Dolly. Of course not! ^ Percy. Well, I want to get up some Dutch courage. Dolly. What for.? Percy. You won't be offended if I tell you.? Dolly. Of course not. „ Percy. Well, while I was in the parlor alone with you, I found out that — er — that — (Too embarrassed to continue.) ^ ^ Dolly. What.? Percy. Sure you won't think I'm changeable if I tell you.? j BETTY'S LAST. BET 109 Dolly. (In hap pi/ anticipation.) No, indeed ! _, Percy. Well, while we were sitting together and looking at the album, I found out that I like you better than I do Kitty. jy^^^^. {Joyously.) Do you.'^ Oh, Percy! (In a practical tone.) Come on out and have your refreshment in the garden. We'll get a glass in here. (Exits U. L.) Percy. (Following her.) You see how perfectly you understand me.^ That's what I like. You're so sympathetic, Dolly! (Exits U. L. after her.) Hannah enters from parlor, R., followed by Jack. Hannah. There they go into the dining room. (Looking after Percy and Dolly.) Jack. Don't call them back. Doll}^ is healing his wounded heart. _._. Hannah. Wounded fiddlesticks ! That was nothing but calf love. T- Jack. Well, what's the matter with calf love? It's like the measles. You catch it while you're young, soon get over it and it leaves no scars. Hannah. (Looking out the door.) My land of love, if there isn't another car! 110 BETTY'S LAST BET Jack. Yes, Colonel Wentworth's. Hannah. What'll the neighbors think.'' Jack. That Mrs. Darling has a parking concession. Betty rmis in from the parlor. Betty. Let's have some music to celebrate. {Begins to select a record.) Jack. That's right. The house of Darling must cele- brate this occasion. (Assists her.) Hannah. (Starting off U. L.) I guess I'd better get into my kitchen or the house of Darling won't have no dinner tonight. And it looks to me as if we was going to have a mob here. (Goes off growling.) Jack. Hannah doesn't seem to take this affair in the rlffht spirit. _, Betty. (Putting dance record on machine.) Hannah's all for the four of us being old maids. Jack. Betty. She took the job of cook with mother years ago just because there were no men around. Jack. Yes, I notice she is the only one that doesn't fall for Cousin Edgar. BETTY'S LAST BET HI Betty. (Starting the music.) Wait until we get found out. Won't she triumph with her "I-told-you-never-to-trust-a-man".? Jack. (Going to her and holding out his arms.) It's a pity to waste all that good dance music. Betty, Yes, isn't it.? (They begin to dance.) Jack. All I've got to say is, Kitty put it over all of us. Betty. (As they dance.) I can't believe it's all true yet. Jack. It looks as if I'd win that bet. Betty. You can't put that sort of thing over more than once. Peggy and Doll^^ are not so clever. Jack. Xo, but as the only male member of the family, I'll go gunning for husbands for them. (They keep dancing around the room.) Betty. I wonder what became of poor Edgar .^^ Jack. Oh, he's back in New York by now. Betty. Poor thing! When mamma finds that out, I may as well pack and leave home. Jack. He'll dig one of his excavations and fall into it. You'll never hear from him again. 112 BETTY'S LAST BET At this moment Edgar with his luggage comes up on the porch. They do not see him. Jack. The poor fish. I feel sorry for him. Betty. Yes, so do I. He looked so stupid. (Edgar is knocking, hut they do not hear him.) • Jack. Yes, he may be clever in archaeology. But as a business man he couldn't put over a deal to sell a twin-six limousine for the price of a tin lizzie. Betty. 1 guess not. (Edgar steps inside,) Jack. Poor old Edffar! _. ^ Betty. Yes, poor little Eddie ! {At this point they hump into Edgar up stage and almost knock him over. Betty screams.) Jack. {Letting her go and jumping to the parlor door (IS Kitty and Mrs. Darling call out, ''What's the matter?'' from the parlor.) All right! All right! Richard appears at the parlor door. Richard. What's the trouble? Jack. Nothing. Nothing, old man. Richard. Didn't vour Cousin Bettv scream? BETTY'S LAST BET 113 Jack. Nothing at all. It's nothing — nothing at all. Richard. {Stepping into the room and seeing Edgar, who is talking in a low tone to Betty.) Who is that fellow.? Jack. (In an undertone.) That.? Oh, that's a peddler. Wants to sell us a patent chicken incubator that you can attach to the electric light. It will also heat a curling iron, grind the co^'ee and rock the baby to sleep. Richard. (Curious.) Well, let US- Jack. (Turning Richard about and shoving him back through R. D.) Go on in there and be happy with Kitty — hang you. I'll get aunty away in a jiffy. Go on in. (Has shoved him back and now closes the door on him. Holds it for a moment and looks at Edgar.) See here, young man, I tliought you were in New York. Betty. He hasn't been back at all. Jack. What.? Edgar. No, you see- Jack. Now, look here. Your train should have gone an hour and a half ago. Edgar. But there is a mistake somewhere. I want to find my aunt, Mrs. Darling. 114 BETTY'S LAST BET Jack. (Coming over to him C.) You're strong on sticking to one idea, aren't you? Sort of single-track mind, I guess. Edgar. You told me to talk to the station master. Betty. (L. of Edgar, who is C.) Yes, why didn't you do it? Edgar. I did talk to him. Betty. What did he say? _ •^ Edgar. He told me where to find my aunt. Betty. {Faintly.) Oh, did he? ^ Edgar. Yes. Jack. Well, then, take his advice and go and find her. Edgar. But this is the liouse he described. Jack. This house? ^ Bktty. Not this house? ^ Edgar. Yes, this is the one. Impossible ! Jack. Betty. Absolutely ! _ -^ Jack. Why, do you know what this house is? BETTY'S LAST BET 115 Betty. Yes, that's what / say. Does he.? Edgar. But I was told that Mrs. Darling — Jack. See here, my friend. {Walks him up to door.) Do you see those cars.? Edgar. Yes. Jack. How many are there parked in front of this house? Edgar. Three. Jack. Did you ever see three cars parked in front of a private house before? Edgar. ^''^' '- Jack. . Of course not. _, Betty. I should say not. ^ Jack. (Turning Edgar about, facing the audience and coming dozen a few steps.) The fact is, there is a convention going on here. Betty. Yes, indeed. „ Edgar. A convention? _ Jack. (Still hiding his arm.) Yes, a matrimonial convention. Edgar. I never heard of such a thins*. 116 BETTY'S LAST BET Betty. You never heard of such a thing? Jack. The idea! Hetty. The very idea! _. ^ Jack. Now, I ask you if your grandmother, or your great aunt, or whoever it is you are looking for, would be holding a matrimonial convention, wher- ever she was.? ^ Edgar. No, I don't suppose — Jack. {Picking up a grip and handing it to him.) Of course not. So don't waste any more of your precious time. I would advise you to get to ancient Greece as soon as possible. Betty. {Handing him another hag.) Yes, here's your bag. And I do hope you'll have a pleasant iourney. -^ ^ J J Edgar. {Now quite dazed.) I was sure the station man said it was the fourth house on the left side of the — Betty'. Isn't that queer.? Jack. {Bustling him tip and off.) I told you he was a queer fish. Don't depend upon what he says, but catch that next train! {Hustling him out the door.) _ ^ Edgar. Thanks very much. BETTY'S LAST BET 117 Betty. You're quite welcome. Jack. You bet you are. (Edgar goes off the porch R. and thei/ look at each other and almost wilt with the sense of relief.) That was a close shave! Betty. (Running to phonograph and stopping it.) I should say so ! Mrs. Darling comes from the parlor, Mrs. Darling. Has the salesman gone.^^ Betty. Yes. Jack. What is it, aunty? Mrs. Darling. I should like to have seen that thing he was selling. Jack. What, the vacuum cleaner,^ Mrs. Darling. (Coming over R. C.) Was it a vacuum cleaner.? I thought it was a cof- fee grinder. 3^^^^. (At L. C.) It was both, mamma. Jack. (At C.) Yes, you could grind your coffee and clean your rugs with it at the same time. Mrs. Darling. I don't believe I'd care for that. 118 BETTY'S LAST BET Betty. That's just what I said, mainina, so I sent hlin away. (She goes out on the porch.) Jack. Well, aunty, how do you like your prospective son-in-law ? -» r -r>. Mrs. Darling. My dear, I can't get my breath over it yet. Think of Katherine making such a splendid match. I can't believe it even now. Poor Perc}'. I can see now wliy Katherine treated him so coldly. Jack. Yes, Percy is a good youth, but not' exactly a fel- low for a girl like Cousin Kitty to rave about. Mrs. Darling. What in the world has become of Peggy? She disappeared an hour ago. Think of it, she doesn't know yet! (Betty is shoxving signs of excitement on the porch, waving her hand and hallooing.) Have you gone crazy, Elizabeth? Betty. {Running inside the door.) Mamma, who is that with Peggy — tliat stunning man? Jack. Hooray, another! Mrs. Darling. {Running up to the window and looking out.) Stunning man? What are you talking about? Well — who in the world? And in another automo- bile! A stranger. Betty. BETTY'S LAST BET 119 Jack. (At Betty's side and in- a loxi^ voice to her.) Steady, Betty. Let the good work go on. Betty. He's getting out, too. Mrs. Darling. Where on earth has that girl been with him.? (She is plainly worried.) , ICasv, aunty. He looks very eligible to me. Peggy and Hamilton are coming up on the porch. Jack. Let us handle him with care. Betty. Where in the world have you been, Peggy.'* {They are coming in.) Positions. Peggy. Hamilton. Jack. Betty. ^ Mrs. Darling. Betty. {Placing him at once.) Oh, Mr. Moriarity, the man who threw the — Peggy. {Quichly, as she turns on Betty.) Sshh ! {Goes and confers with Betty, R.) Jack. {Shaking hands.) We are delighted to meet you, Mr. Moriarity. Mrs. Darling. Yes, indeed. {She is too dazed to know what she is really doing and stares in his face.) 120 BETTY'S LAST BET Hamilton. I am very happy to make your acquaintance. I suppose you thought I had run away with your (laufijhter? __ ^ Mrs. Darling. No, I really have been so busy that I — Jack. (Helping her out.) Yes, we have had rather a whirl of a time today, haven't we, aunty .^ (The three talk in an under- tone. ) -r, ^ 13ETTY. (To Peggy.) And you've been riding all this time with him.'' Peggy. Yes. And oh, Betty, he is wonderful ! You never saw such an adorable flirt! Betty. My dear, don't waste any time on flirts. Choose one that is in earnest, as Kitty did. Peggy. Percy.? ^ -^ Betty. No, my dear, Percy's Uncle Richard. Peggy. I don't know what you are talking about. (Betty imparts the news about Richard and Kitty in an undertone.) _, -_^ Mrs. Darling. Won't you stay to dinner this evening, JNIr. Mori- arity.? tt Hamilton. Why, I should be very glad if — if I sha'n't be in- truding. - ^ Jack. Not at all. This Is Liberty Hall. Isn't it, aunty.? BETTY'S LAST BET 131 Mrs. Darling. I don't know tliat I'd exactly call It that. But we like to be nice to nice people. Won't you sit down, Mr. Moriarity. Hamilton. Thank 3^ou. (Indicates seat for her, and "after ^^^'•") Mrs. Darling. I think I must confer with my cook. Then I want you to meet my daughter's fiance, Colonel Richard Wentworth. {Very proudly as she pronounces his name.) tt ^ Hamilton. Colonel Richard Wentworth? Why, that is the man I came down here in search of. Jack. You don't say. _._. • Hamilton. I am an officer in the guard myself. And I've had some correspondence with Colonel Wentworth over the summer encampment and the new rifle range. Mrs. Darling. Oh, indeed. And what is your rank? Hamilton. Mai or. -r •^ Jack. Major Moriarity, you ought to charm the votes off the bushes at election time with such a name as that. (The three talk in an undertone.) Peggy. (Wildly excited.) And they are really and truly engaged? How marvelous ! _, IJETTY. You never saw anything so clever in your life. We can thank Cousin Edgar for it. 122 V BETTY'S LAST BET Peggy. Where are they? I want to sec him. I want to congratulate them ! _ iiETTY. In the parlor. We drank their health in some of mother's dandelion wine. Peggy. And I missed the whole thing ! Betty. Oh, I guess you aren't sorry. My dear, he is certainly there with the charm. Peggy. He is wonderful w^hen he gets talking. Quotes poetry and everything. Betty. Peggy, you are more in love witli him than' ever. Peggy. Oh, Betty, ^I'm crazy about him ! Betty. {Immediately crossing her and going L. and beck- oning to Jack.) Oh, Cousin Edgar, may I speak to you a moment? Jack. (To Mrs. Darling and Hamilton.) Will you excuse me? (He goes to Betty and the two go up and out on the porch where she is seen to tell him animatedly about Peggy's infatuation. Jack takes the story in with great interest.) Mrs. Darling. Peggy, perhaps you will tell the Colonel that Ma- jor Moriarity wishes to see him. You will excuse me, Major? BETTY'S LAST BET 123 Hamilton. (With a s J)] end id hoTC.) Certainly, madam. (E.vit Mrs. Darling, U. L.) Peggy. Do you suppose I dare interrupt the cooing doves in there.? __ Hamilton. You might give them a moment or two more. (///- dicates that she come over to the sofa xvhere he is standing',) I hate to interrupt love's young dream hy talking about pup tents and camp kitchens. Peggy. (Crossing and sitting on sofa.) How do you find time for military duty with all the wonderful work 3'ou do for the State.? Hamilton. My dear Miss Darling, the work we do for the State is mostly in words. The supply is unlimited and costs nothing;. _, " Peggy. Oh, but I am sure 3^ou must be making all sorts of wonderful laws to make everything better. Hamilton. I shall have to get you to take the stump for me in my next campaign. Peggy. I wish I could. I'd love to be of some use in the wor Id. Hamilton. (Sentimentally .) Ah, but better still you bless the earth with your beauty. As Shakespeare says, "Beauty too rich for use, for earth too dear." 124 BETTY'S LAST BET Peggy. {Delighted hut embarrassed.) I'm afraid I don't deserve all that. Hamilton. What do you think I meant when I threw those pansies at your feet the first time we met? Peggy. I'm sure you say these things to so many girls. Hamilton. Well, if a man has an eye for beauty, why shouldn't he pay tribute to it wherever he meets it? Peggy. (Rises disappointed.) I'd better go in and give your message to my new brother-in-law elect. (Crosses to K. on her way to parlor. ) (Betty comes in C* D. with Jack froni porch.) Betty. Yes, yes, you speak to her about it. (Goes down C. to Hamilton, who has risen.) Jack. Just a moment. Cousin Peggy. (She stops near the parlor door and they talk in an undertone.) Betty. (To Hamilton.) I'm afraid you think we are a very unconven- tional family. Hamilton. I haven't had the luck to meet all of it, but so far I should say it was just about the corkingest family in Connecticut. _, Betty. My sister, Peggy, is so inexperienced, I suppose BETTY'S LAST BET 125 she didn't think anything about going off with a stranger. Hamilton. A man who represents this district in the State Assembly you can't exactly call a stranger. Betty. Oh, but you are a flirt. You'll admit that.? Hamilton. • (Egotistically^.) A little flirting, now and then, is relished by the staidest men. Betty. (Very seriously.) Still, I wish that — oh, well, I mustn't say any- th'"& Hamilton. (Bewildered.) I don't understand. Betty. I only hope that no trouble comes of it. My Cousin Edgar is so hot-headed. Hamilton. (Worried.) I don't know what you 'mean. Betty. (Going- up and around bach of the table as she speaks.) Excuse me, won't you.'* Oh, Peggy, wait for me. (Hamilton is perplexed.) Jack. (Aside to Peggy.) Remember, if you want to be Mrs. Moriarity you will have to follow your Cousin Edgar's lead. Peggy. If I were only sure that he loves me. 126 BETTY'S LAST BET Jack. A man always loves the girl he thinks some other fellow's after. (Turning to Hamilton.) I am sure you will excuse the young ladies, Major Moriarity.? Hamilton. Certainly. (The girls go into the parlor. He looks at Jack, zcho is moodily glaring at him. Feeling nneomfortahle in t^ie pause, he takes out his zcatch and looks at it.) I — I — I think, after all, if you will give my excuses to Mrs. Darling, that I will go back to the Colonel's house and wait for him there. Jack. (Ponderously.) Why.'^ Why not wait for him here.'' Hamilton. (Uncomfortable under Jack's stare.) I think it would be very bad taste for me to butt in at a time like this. (Starts up stage.) Jack. Wait! (Hamilton stops. From now on Jack puts up a big bluff.) I want a few words with you. Do you know that 3'ou are breaking up one of the happiest homes in this country.? Hamilton. (Amazed.) I .? I don't know what you are talking about. Jack. You came here today like a serpent in the garden. Hamilton. (Getting mad.) Oh, here now — _. Jack. You have been destroying the hopes of every man BETTY'S LAST BET 127 in this town who aspired to win Margaret Darling as his wife. ^^ Hamilton. Why — why. Is she engaged.^ Jack. {In a righteous manner.) If she is not, it is simply because she cannot make up her mind which to choose among the young men who are in love with her. Hamilton. She never said anything about — about — Jack. Ah, that was it. You, with your eloquence, your oratory, your command of English, have hypnotized her. You have advertised to everyone in this town that you are interested in her. You, a marked man, a conspicuous political figure. Don't tell me you didn't know what you were doing. Hamilton. But my dear fellow, she wanted to go. Jack. Ah, there you have the weakness of the female nature. She confided her reputation to you, never dreaming that she was driving off those honest but more humble admirers. (This last very threaten- ^^^^'^ Hamilton. Now, look here, Mr. — Mr. — whatever your name is. T ■ Jack. Edgar — Cousin Edgar. But that is of small im- portance. / am thinking of that poor girl's repu- tation. _._. Hamilton. But this is sheer nonsense. I had no idea of any- 128 BETTY'S LAST BET thing but a pleasant drive about the town while I was waiting to see Colonel Wentworth. Jack. Ah, the Colonel ! What will he say ? He is mar- rying into this family. He knows what the gossips are in this town. If he gets down on you, you couldn't be elected poundmaster from this district. Hamilton. {Completely mystified and dazed by all this and beginning to weaken.) But, my dear friend, I really don't know what this is all about. Jack. That's it. Men like you take everything as a matter of course. Hamilton. But my intention was to — Jack. (Bristling up to him,.) Do you know the place that is paved with inten- tions? Good ones at that.^^ Hamilton. (Getting angry.) But I had no intention to — Jack. Ha-ha! No intentions! That's it, no intentions! You break up a girl's life, destroy her future, drive the men who love her to despair, and then you say you have "no intentions." (He is making a good loud bluff himself.) Hamilton. But I tell you there is a mistake. BETTY'S LAST BET 129 Jack. {Taking off his coat with a belligerent air.) There is. But there will be no mistake about what I'm ffoinsf to do. _._ ^ ° Hamilton. Look here, I'm not going into a strange house and start fighting. Keep your shirt on. I am will- ing to apologize to whoever I have harmed. Jack. Apologize? ,-, ^ ^ Hamilton. Certainly. What else can a gentleman do? Jack. He can fight for his woman as did the cave man of old! ^ Hamilton. But I'm not a cave man. Jack. Then you refuse to give me satisfaction as the head of the family.? Very well. We'll see what the Colonel has to say. __. Hamilton. (Alarmed.) Colonel Wentworth? Jack. Yes. And Lord help you if he gets after you. He'll put you in your political grave in this district. (Making a bluff as if starting for the parlor, he grabs up his coat and puts it on again.) Hamilton. Wait. Wait. Can't we find a way to compro- mise ? Jack. There's just one way you can compromise now. _^ ..1.3 Hamilton. How IS that.'' 130 BETTY'S LAST BET Jack. Marry Margaret and make her happy. Hamilton. Isn't that a pretty stiff price to pay for a flirta- tion.? I am not a marrying man, you know, but — Jack. I'll let the Colonel decide, {Makes another break for the parlor door.) Hamilton. (Running and catching his arm R. C.) Here, here ! Wait, wait ! What I was going to say was — I can imagine no more charming wife in the world than Margaret. So if — Jack. {Joyously breaking away and running to the parlor door.) Yes, yes. I understand. You needn't make a speech about it. {Throzcing the door open.) Come out here, Peggy. Come everybody and offer your congratulations. (Hamilton is embarrassed but g^^e.) B^^^y {Rushing out first.) What in the world are you talking about.? Jack. {Introducing her to Hamilton.) This is Miss Elizabeth Darling, the youngest of the Darlings. p^^^^. {Enters breathlessly.) Why, what is it, Edgar.? Jack. The Honorable Hamilton Moriarity has some- thing to say to the family, I believe. BETTY'S LAST. BET 131 Betty. What is it? {She looks dazed and Jack points to Peggy and then Hamilton.) Jack. Yes, get your mother in here. (Betty exits U. L. on the run.) Richard and Kitty enter R. wonderingly. Richard. {Seeing Hamilton.) Isn't this Major Moriarity.'^ Hamilton. {Saluting.) Yes, Colonel. I called to see you about the plans for the camp, and — _. Jack. I think the Colonel is taking a day off from mili- tary matters, aren't you, Colonel.^ {Goes over to Peggy R. and explains how the land lies.) Richard. Yes, rather. Major, let me present you to my future commanding officer, Miss Katherine Darling. Kitty. Pm ever so glad to meet you. Hamilton. Congratulations. ^ Richard. {Happy and glowing as he stands C. with Kitty on his R. and Moriarity L. Peggy is hack of the table.) Love at first sight, it was with us. Wasn't it, Kitty. {Rather shyly.) Yes. Kitty.? 132 BETTY'S LAST BET Richard. That is the sign of the real thing. You look into the divorce cases and you'll find it was a long drawn out courtship. Both sick of each other before they tied up. ^ Kitty. Oh, Richard, do you believe that.'^ Richard. My dear, I intend to be married as soon as you can get your trunk packed. I won't give you time to learn all my bad habits beforehand. Hamilton. (Thoughtfullij.) I believe there is something in that. Jack. That's the idea. Mr. Moriarity was just saying he believed in love at first sight himself. Hamilton. (Choking with surprise.) I— b-b blub— hm ! Jack. My Cousin Peggy, here, too, has a few ideas on the subject. Haven't you, Peg.^ Peggy. {She also scarcely knows what to say, but stares at Hamilton.) Why, I — I — I think it's — b-b-beautiful. Richard. Well, well. Is it possible that — (With a smile at Hamilton, meaning that he is aware.) Hamilton. (Stammering.) Why, you see — it is — it is like this. I — I — I — BETTY'S LAST BET 133 Jack. The I's have it. (To Peggy.) Step lively, Peggy, and clinch it. _. Peggy. (Looking very pretty and helpless as she steps down between Richakd and Hamiltox.) Really— I— I— ,. -^ Kitty. . {Immensely surprised.) Why, Peggy, you don't mean that you — that you — , *' Jack. Exactly. {Nervously looking toward the door L.) Where is your mother.? {To Kitty, with a wink.) I think we all know the dance that Peggy has led several of the eligible young men in Stock- bridge ; the suitors that have been waiting for her to choose. But it has remained for that rising young statesman, that fearless orator, that stalwart young guardsman, the Honorable Major Hamilton Mori- arity, to distance them all in the affections of our dear and fascinating Margaret. Richard. Hooray! Wait till the regiment hears it. Wait till your women constituents get the news ! Cap- tured ! The 3^oungest and handsomest member of the Legislature ! And by my own pretty little sister-in- law elect. We'll have a double wedding. Kitty. {Runs and kisses Peggy.) Oh, Peggy. How did you keep it such a secret.'* Peggy. I never expected to see him again. And then — 134 BETTY'S LAST BET Hamilton. (Now carried away completely/ and losing his in- stinctive fear of marriage, he draws Peggy to him.) Make me happy and say yes. Peggy. (Looking up at him.) Yes! (He kisses her.) At this moment Mrs. Darling and .Betty come in U. L. The good lady is in a terribly fussed state, not knowing whether to be pleased or angry. Jack. Bless you, my children ! Ah, here is aunty. What if she forbids the banns .^ Have you fixed it for them, Betty.? Betty. Yes, Peggy told me all about falling in love at first sight, and- _ Jack. (Bringing Betty down on his R. and Mrs. Dar- ling on his L. and, all at center.) Of course. And forgetting the fellows that were trying to get her to change her name and be Mrs. Them. (All the family are amazed at these zohop- pers, but letting him carry them off.) Why, I knew they had lost out when I saw Peggy advertising to- day that she was going to be Mrs. Moriarity by riding all over the place in Hamilton's car. (Talk- ing glibly and crossing and, as he comes to the end of the above, seizing Hamilton's hand.) Congratu- lations, you've won a prize. Ham, old man, I wish you both joy. (To Peggy.) Peggy, take your Cousin Edgar's blessing. (Kisses her.) Betty. And mine, too. (She kisses Peggy a7id with a BETTY'S LAST BET 135 wicked look up at Moriarity.) What a whirl you must be! t»^ x^ Mrs. Darling. Margaret, dear! (She is weeping a tiny hit as she kisses Peggy.) Mr. — er — a — Major — my son ! (Kisses him; he embraces her.) I hope you will be very happy. (Kitty and Richard have gone up stage. Mrs. Darling is still a bit confused.) Come in to the parlor, my dears. We must have a toast to the happiness of Peggy and — and — oh, yes, Mr. Moriarity. (She exits into the parlor,) Richard. (Following with his arm around Kitty.) Come on in, Moriarity. Come, Peggy, this is a festival da.y. Come, we'll make it a foursome. (He and Kitty go into the parlor. Hamilton is fol- lowing with his arm around Peggy.) Hamilton. (Stopping just outside the door.) I don't know how this has all happened. Peggy. Neither do I. Hamilton. But I'm very happy. How about you.? Peggy. I feel as if I were in a beautiful dream. Hamilton. All right, then. Don't let anybody wake us up. (He kisses her and they exit into parlor.) Jack. ( Who has been watching them, with Betty, holds up his hand, extending his first and second fingers.) Two! 136 BETTY'S LAST BET Betty. You are a wizard. Jack. And our bet.? _^ Betty. It isn't won vet. •^ Jack. Two-thirds won. How about paying.? Betty. {Dancing away L.) Pay in full on delivery. Jack. All right; never say die. Betty. (Stopping suddenly over by the door.) Hush! (Noise of Dolly's and Percy's voices in the dining room.) My goodness, what's the matter with Percy.? Jack. Are they coming in here.? (Goes over to closet door Betty. Yes. Jack. Come here and let us decide what to do next. (Opens the door and steps inside. She follows. They do 7iot close the door. He stands with his hand on the knob, the door screening them.) Dolly. (Outside L.) Come in here. They've all gone now. Dolly and Percy enter U. L., she supporting him. Percy is feeling the effects of the home-made bev- erage. _, ^ Percy. It'sh sho funny. I never felt like thish before. BETTY'S LAST BET 137 Dolly. Oh, Percy, I do hope you are not going to die! Percy. Sho do I. (Dolly is leading him to the sofa, zchich is just above and beyond the closet door.) Jack. {Aside to Betty.) Percy is spifflicated. Dolly. Sit down here, Percy, and rest. {Putting him down on the sofa and sitting below him.) Percy. Yesh- — thatsh it. I need a resht. {Shaking his head sadly.) What I've been through thish evening ish too much. ^ Dolly. Why, it isn't evening yet. Percy. Ishn't it.^ I thought it wash. I've shuffered sho much I can't remember. Dolly. Don't think about it any more. Percy. {Taking her hand and looking at her pathetically.) You feel shorry for me — don't you, Dolly .^ Dolly. Yes, but I don't think it's your suffering that's made you ill. Jr ERCY. Oh, yesh it ish. My shufferings are shimply ter- rible. ^ Dolly. I'm afraid it's mamma's dandelion wine. 138 BETTY'S LAST BET Percy. (Shaking his head solemnly.) It wasn't the wine made me shufFcr. It was that lieartless shister of yours. Dolly. No, no. I mean it was the wine that made you ill. Percy. Did I drink some wine.? Dolly. Why, yes. Don't you remember.? Percy. Ishn't it fiersli P I can't remember anyshing. All I know ish that nobody lovsh me. (Begins to weep.) Dolly. Oh, don't say that, Percy. I — I like you. Percy. Thash jusht it! Thash jusht it! Everybody liksh me. Nobody lovsh me. Speshly girls. Dolly. (Half shyly.) You don't want anybody to love you but Kitty. Percy. (Recklessly.) I don't care who lovsh me; just sho shomebody lovsh me. (Weeping.) It'sh a terrible thing when nobody lovsh you. Terrible ! (Jack has been whispering to Betty, and he noiv steps out of the closet, followed by her.) Jack. Here, here! What sort of a speech is that.? BETTY'S LAST BET 139 Dolly. {With a little scream of fright.) Oh, Edgar! (She jumps up and runs over to the other side of the room. Jack stands in front of Percy ivith folded arms.) Betty. What in the world ails him.? Dolly. Why, he took only two glasses of mother's dande- Hon wine. Then he began to get so wobbly — and like this. j^^j. (Sternli/.) What I want to know is, are you trifling with tnis g^^^-^ Dolly. (Frightened and clinging to Betty.) What is he talking about.? Betty. Be quiet, Dolly ! _, ^ -^ Percy. (Staring up at Jack.) Trifling.? Whash you mean, trifling.? Jack. I mean talking about love to Dolly. Percy. Who elsh will I talk to.? Dolly's sho shympathetic. Jack. Exactly. And you are trifling with her sympa- thies, you young brute. Percy. Brute.? Are you calling me a brute.? Jack. I certainly am. You were taking advantage of 140 BETTY'S LAST BET being alone here to speak of love to mj Cousin Dolly. Weren't you? Percy. Yesh. TA Dolly. Oh, Edgar, how can you? Betty. You know you are crazy about him. Dolly. Oh, hush ! Jack. Dolly, could you make up your mind to marry this besotted youth if he were to ask you? Dolly. Oh, Edgar, I'd adore to. Percy. (To himself.) Brute — who's a brute? Jack. Now, sir, you have won the affections of my cousin. What are you going to do about it? Percy. Affectionsh? Do you mean that shomebody lovsh me ? -. Jack. I certainly do. (Struggling to get on his feet.) Lead me to her. Jack. Dolly, come here. _, *^ Betty. (Steering Dolly over to him,) Now, Dolly, do your part. BETTY'S LAST BET 141 Dolly. If he were only more like himself. (Jack is assisting Percy to his feet.) Betty.. He'd never have the nerve to propose then. Jack. Dolly, would you burden yourself with such a spec- imen as this? _-. Dolly. Oh, Edgar, I'd adore to. Percy. ( Wobblt/ but sincere. ) Dolly, you're the most affectionate girl I ever knew. I'm so crazy about you that I didn't dare shay so. tJ ACJK.. There, Dolly. (Passing her L. C. to Peggy.) Dolly. • Oh, Percy ! •^ Percy. Lesh run away and get married. Dolly. But you're not quite — yourself. Percy. I know it. If nobody lovsh me I want to drink myshelf to death. Could you love me when I'm sober, Dollj^ darling? Dolly. Oh, Percy! You are too heavenly. (She guides him to the sofa.) „ Percy. And will you be Mrs. Pershy Wentworth? Dolly. (Sitting mith him.) But I thought you were in love with Kitty. 142 BETTY'S LAST BET Percy. I wash, until I found out you were sho shjn«pa- thetic. Then I found out it wash you, Dolly, I loved all the time. ^ Dolly. Oh, Percy! {They embrace.) Jack. {Holding up his hand with three fingers extended.) Three! Betty. I don't believe it! ^ Jack. {Running across to the parlor door.) Just you wait. {Calls into parlor.) Come in here, everybody. The latest candidates for congratula- tions are in here. Moriarity, you and Peggy are back numbers already. (Betty goes up to windoxv L.) Mrs. Darling, Hamilton, Peggy, Richard and Kitty come in from the parlor. Jack takes Mrs. Darling hy the arm and leads the procession down the stage in front of Percy and Dolly on the sofa.) Jack. Come on, aunty, you've got another prospective son-in-law. _ _ ^ Mrs. Darling. What in the world do you mean-f^ Dolly. {Jumping up and going to her mother.) Oh, mamma, he — he — (Kitty has taken in the situation and has been whispering to Richard.) Richard. Percy, what the devil are you up lo? BETTY'S LAST BET 143 Percy. I'm through wish college. I'm going to be happy. Mrs. Darting. Do you mean that you have proposed to Dolly ^ Percy. I can't remember. But I want a bleshing on our wedding. _ , ^ ° Mrs. Darling. I don't know whether I'm in my right senses or Peggy and Kitty. How wonderful ! The idea! Hamilton. It seems to be in the air. Richard. Perhaps marriage would make a man of him. Jack. You bet it would! {To Mrs. Darling.) Give your consent, aunty. __ ^ -^ Mrs. Darling. Why — why — {All hut Jack and Betty crowd around in front of the sofa to congratulate Percy and Dolly.) Richard. What's the matter with you, Percy? Percy. Excush me, I'm feeling very ill. Dolly. (Kitty and Peggy kiss her.) Oh, girls, isn't it magical the way things have happened today.? ^ Richard. Well, I hope you will be as happy as I am, boy. 144 BETTY'S LAST BET Hamilton. Congratulations. (Percy cannot he seen hy the audience for the others in front of him.) Jack. ( Who has gone up and got Betty and is now bring- her down.) Come, now; own up. I've won. Betty. Then I suppose I've lost. Jack. Pay up. J Betty. Oh, not now. _. fjACK. When ? Betty. Oh, when there isn't a whole crowd present. Jack. Come out on the porch. {Taking her hand.) He does not see Edgar, who with his luggage is again on the porch coming to the door. Jack. Come on. {They almost hump into Edgar.) Jack and Betty. {Together.) Look who's here! {All the others turn around and see the stranger and exclaim.) Jack. What are you doing back here again .^^ Edgar. {Speaking angrily at the top of his voice.) I want to see my aunt. BETTY'S LAST BET 145 Jack. {Trying to hustle him out.) Don't you see the convention's in session? Betty. Oh, do go away ! Mrs. Darling. Is that the peddler.^ Edgar. {Breaking away from Jack and coming down C) Aunt Mary, don't you know me.? All. Aunt Marv? -^ Jack. (To Betty.) It's all ofF. Edgar. Aunt Mary Darling, I'm your nephew, Edgar Darling. And this person has been trying to keep me from seeing you all afternoon. All. What? __ ^ Mrs. Darling. I think I'm going crazy. Kitty. {To Jack.) Aren't you Edgar Darling? Peggy. Aren't you? ^ -^ Dolly. Aren't you? Jack. I have been for three short hours, but I resign in favor of this gentleman who seems to have a prior right to the title. 146 BETTYS LAST BET ^Iiis. Darling. Good heavens ! What it what and who is who ? {They all stand amazed at this new retwlation.) Edgar. This person and that young lady have been trying to tell me that you didn't live here. Betty. Now, Edgar, can't you take a joke? Jack. I'm afraid we can't depend upon Edgar's sense of humor. Betty {Crossing to her mother.) Xow, mamma, don't be angry. It was a bet. x\ll. Mrs. Darling. And what was this precious bet? Betty. Why, he bet that the girls — {Realizing the dan- ger of telling.) Oh, my goodness, it was just a bet, and I lost. ,_ .^^ Mrs. Darling. And how much shall I have to pay for your losing your bet? Jack. {At L. C.) Oh, my dear madam, I couldn't permit you to pay. Mrs. Darling. Why not? *^ Betty. It was three kisses, mamma, one for each of the ^''^'- . The Giri-s. From us? „ Betty. No, / was the one to pay. BETTY'S LAST BET 147 Richard. And who is this young man? Jack. (Pulling card from case.) Here is my card, Colonel Wentworth. I am Jack Van Loon of the Seventh New York. Hamilton and Richard. Jack Van Loon? Captain Jack Van Loon? Jack. Y"es, I'm down here toda^^ picking out a site for a new factory. I'll be camping here, too, with you fellows. „ Richard. Why, of course. _._. Hamilton. Yes, but what's all this stuff you've been putting ^^^^- Richard. (Seriously.) Yes, what's the idea? Jack. Well, I'm after one of these Darlings, and I wanted to get you fellows out of the way. Hamilton. Which one? ^ Richard. You can't have Kitty, my boy. Hamilton. Nor Peggy. ^^^^^ Nor Dolly. j^^^ (With a laugh.) I'll take what's left of the Darlings. (Peggy a?id Kitty have surrounded Betty, B.C. To Edgar, 148 BETTY'S LAST BET who is talking to ^Irs. DarlixCx earnestly.) Edgar, forgive nie. I have immortalized you, but you didn't know it. _, Betty. Jack Van Loon is the one who paid my fine at the police station, brought me home in his car, and — (Kitty crosses to Richard.) Jack. {Going R. C. fo'BETTY.) And is going to collect three kisses from you now, providing you'll — {He stops.) Betty. What? {He whispers in her ear and she nods.) Jack. You will.^ Then here goes. One! {He kisses one cheek.) Two! {Kisses the other cheek.) Three! {Kisses her forehead.) And four for the future Mrs. Jack Van Loon. {Kisses her on the lips. Betty is enraptured.) Hannah enters U. L. Hannah. My land sakes, there's another ottymobile in front of the house. Wliat'll the neighbors think.? Jack. Tell them there was a bridegroom in every one of them. -.-. Hannah. {Falls back and looks at all the lovers.) ' Good Lord ! _ Peggy. {At the phonograph.) Oh, let's celebrate! BETTY'S LAST BET 149 Mrs. Darling. Make yourself at home, Edgar. These are all your cousins. (She sits in a chair L. of table. Edgar, n^ar her, puts down his grips. Hannah is up L. Percy is now fast asleep on the sofa with his head on Dolly's shoulder. Richard and Kitty L. C. Hamilton and Peggy R. Jack and Betty C.) Betty. {To Jack.) What will you bet that we quarrel .^^ Jack. No, this is my last bet. Betty. And mine, too. 1 swear off. Hannah. Have they all gone crazy .^ What do you call this, ^ ^' Mrs. Darling. This is what I call the end of a perfect day ! {She makes Edgar at home L. C. Percy and Dolly are still on the sofa. Hannah is up L. C The three other happy young couples dance in a circle around the stage to the music of the phono- graph.) Curtain, Mary's Millions nv Frederick G. Johnson A RURAL COMEDY in ?, acts; ', males, f, females, extras optional. Time, 2 hours. Scenes: 1 interior, 1 exterior. CHARACTERS. Jaclv Henderson A Civil Engineer •limmie Barnes His Friend from New York Ezra Stoneham The Village Storekeeper Ahija Boggs A Human Flivver Victor de Selles An Imported Product Jane Stoneham Ezra's Better Halt Eudora Smith The Stoneham's Hired Girl Lola de Selles Victor's Sister Mrs. Mudge Wedded to Her Ouija Board Betty Barlow A Country School Teacher Mary Manners An Heiress to Millions Members of the Choir. "When T go after a side partner, she's going to be a live-wire lady. No corn-fed beauties for mine." "Say — honest — is there anybody in this one-horse town that has a million dollars?" "I've read books. I have, about tliem slick rascals from the city." "Waitin' for the mail? Looks more like waitin' for the female." "More city folks, I'll bet a doughnut." "I believe in sperrits. but I ain't seen none sense the country went dry." "Stop scratchin'! Ain't you got no company manners?" "He looks like a head waiter and he talks like a bottle of seltzer." "All foreign wild ani- mals looks alike to me." "The greatest doin's since the mill dam busted." "What's been swiped an' who done it?" "Any clues? No. all genuine pearls." "She has chain lightning slowed down like the rural free delivery." "I foller the deeductive method. I don't take no clues off no Fiji board!" "Boy, I sure do hate to take you, but I reckon T got to." "Funny what a difference just a few rqillions make." "The third degree trimmed with hayseed." "Eudory, you say the durndest thingsl" Professional stage rights reserved and a royalty of fifteen dollars required for amateur performance. Price, Per Copy, 50 Cents T. S. Denison & Company, Publishers 623 South Wabash Avenue CHICAGO Old Maids Fannv Cannon A COMEDY in 3 acts: 5 males, s leinales. Time, 1' hours. Scenes: 2 interiors. CHARACTERS. Caselda Brown From New York Amanda Chase Her Aunt Alma Bellows Afraid of the Black List Mrs. Bemus No Old Maid, Thank Heaven! Miranda Purcell One of the Old Maids Abby Snyder. , Another Sarah Stone Still Another Emma Nelson And Another Christopher Bellows A Prosperous Farmer Jed Hopkins ; . The Postmaster Henry Perkins The Village "Catch'' William Bemus A Farmer Jasper Elwood From New York This might be called the tragi -comedy of a small town. Alma, aged 25, with a "liorrible example" of a town full of unmated women, accepts the onl\- mar- riageable young man in the neighborhood for fear of being an old maid. But Caselda, an attractive and mouthful-seeming "old maid," arrives from New York, and in dramatic yet laughable fashion she turns things around, opening the eyes of her former townsmen and saving Alma from the "village beau." Running through the comedy is a vein of serious undercurrent on the status of the unattached female, and a hint as to the way out. Every person in OLD MA IDS is a '"type" tliat invites the skill of the artistic performer. Miss Cannon is the author of many professional stage successes as well as an authority on the technique of playwriting, and in this comedy she offers rare oppor- tunity to a group of skillful character players. Professional stas^e rights reserved and a royalty of fifteen dollars required for amateur performance. Price, Per Copy, 50 Cents T. S. Denison & Company, Pnblishers 623 South Wabash Avenue CHICAGO Whose Little Bride Are You? BY Edith Ellis A FARCE Comedy, in 3 acts; 5 males, 5 females. Time, 21/0 hours. Scene: 1 handsomely furnished living room. This play was written by the author of "Mary Jane's Pa" and other nation-wide successes. CAST OF CHARACTERS. Dr. Benjamin Bellows. A Sentimental Retired Physician Algernon Clawhammer. . .His Prospective Son-In-Law Augustus May His Butler Simeon Singleton His Old Friend George Tobin His Prospective Step-Son Florence Bellows His Charming Daughter Mrs. MacEckron His Neighbor Dolly MacEckron Her Daughter Maggie Brady The Maid Mrs. Amelia Tobin The Bride-To-Be At the beginning one potential bride is visible; be- fore the final curtain the woods, so to speak, are full of them. The brides range in assortment from the little flapper not yet out of her teens, to the seasoned 200-pound campaigner who has worn the orange blos- soms no less than four times. Matrimonial pairing proceeds even to the butler and the housemaid. Mis- taken identity furnishes an unusual measure of com- plications until it actually becomes a problem as to which little bride is which, or who. Plot, situations and dialogue dovetail perfectly. The incidents are as humorous and rapid-fire as ever went into a play. It is especially adapted to amateurs, the parts being so vividly characterized and the action so continuous that the piece virtually carries itself. Professional stage rights reserved and a royalty of fifteen dollars required for amateur performance. Price, Per Copy, 50 Cents T. S. Denison & Company, Publishers 623 S. Wabash Ave. CHICAGO Plays for Schools and Colleges THE HIGH SCHOOL FRESHMAN By Charles Ulrich. Comedy in 3 acts; 12 males. Time, 2 hours. Price, 25 Cents. THE KINGDOM OF HEART'S CONTENT By LIndsey Barbee. Comedy in 3 acts; 6 males, 12 fe- males. Time, 2% hours. Price, 35 Cents. MACBETH A LA MODE By Walter Ben Hare. Burletta in 3 acts; 7 males, 7 females. Time, 1V4 hours. Price, 25 Cents. MRS. TUBES OF SHANTYTOWN By Walter Ben Hare. Comedy-drama in 3 acts; 4 males, 7 females. Time, 2^. hours. Price, 35 Cents. A POOR MARRIED MAN By Walter Ben Hare. Farce-comedy in 3 acts; 4 males, 4 females. Time, 2 hours. Price, 35 Cents. A PRAIRIE ROSE By Edith F. A. U. Palnton. Comedy-drama in 4 acts; 7 males, 4 females. Time, 2% hours. Price, 35 Cents. THE REAL THING AFTER ALL By Lindsey Barbee. Comedy in 3 acts; 7 males, 9 fe- males. Time, 2% hours. Price, 35 Cents. RE-TAMING OF THE SHREW By John W. Postgate, Shakespearean travesty in 1 act; 6 males, 5 females. Time. 45 minutes. Price, 25 Cents. RUTH IN A RUSH By LIndsey Barbee. Comedy in 3 acts; 5 males, 7 fe- males. Time, 2^^ hours. Price, 35 Cents. SAVAGELAND By Walter Ben Hare. Musical comedy in 2 acts; 5 males. 5 females. Time, 2^^ hours. Price, 75 Cents. SING A SONG OF SENIORS By LIndsey Barbee. Comedietta; 7 females. Time, 80 minutes. ^ Price, 25 Cents. STAR BRIGHT By Edith F. A. U. Palnton. Comedy-drama in 3 acts; 6 males, 5 females. Time. 2^ hours. Price, 35 Cents. ZARAGUETA OR MONEY TALKS Translated from the Spanish by Clarence Stratton. Comedy in 2 acts; 7 males, 4 females. Time, 2 hours. Price, 35 Cents. T. S. Denison & Company, Publishers 623 S. Wabash Ave. CHICAGO T-1021 Denison's Acting Plays Our list comprises hundreds of titles — comedies, dramas, farces, vaudeville sketches, musical comedies and revues, minstrel material, little theatre playlets, etc. All shades of sentiment are rep- resented, and all varieties of talent, number of characters and time required in presentation are provided for in this list. Denison's Acting Plays contain detailed description of stage business, characters, costumes, settings, and full instructions for staging. Popular Entertainment Books In this series are books touching every feature in the entertainment field; Dialogues for all ages, Speakers, Reci- tations, Monologues, Drills, Entertain- ments, suitable for all occasions; hand- books for home, school and church, etc. Over sixty titles, each written by a specialist in his given line. The books are finely made, clear print, good paper, and each has a most attractive, individ- ual cover design. One of the best and most complete entertainment series published. Send for Complete Descriptive Catalogue T. S. Denison & Company, Publishers 623 S. Wabash Ave. ' CHICAGO ^.