NO PLAYS EXCHANGED. ^^^ «,s Look Out For Paint Price, 25 Cents ^^'^ O/jr r? .^s, COPYRIGHT, 1889, BY WALTER H. BAKER & CO. B. lU* Pitiero's Plays Price, SO eent$ €acb THF AMA7nN^ Farce in Three Acts. Seven males, five fe- iriCi i\.lili\£t\Ji%u males. Costumes, modern; scenery, not difficult. Plays a full evening. TII17 TAHIMPT MIIUKTCD Farce in Four Acts. Ten Int. LADlPl£.i iVilillOlLK males, nine females. Cos tumes, modern society; scenery, three interiors. Plays a full evening- HANFlY niPK" ^3,rce in Three Acts. Seven males, four fe- Ui\nU 1 l/l\^IV, males. Costumes, modern ; scenery, two inte- riors. Plays two hours and a half. TUF r* AV I nPn niirY comedy in Four Acts. Four males, inCi UAl LVfRU KIVLmA. ten females. Costumes, modern ; scenery, two interiors and an exterior. Plays a full evening. UfC UATTCr TKT HDnri? Comedy in Four Acts. Nine males, IllO ni/Ui3£i 111 UAUEilV four females. Costumes, modern; scenery, three interiors. Plays a full evening. TUV UnilDV UriDCr comedy in Three Acts. Ten males, ini!i nUDDI nUlViJE. Ave females. Costumes, modern; scenery easy. Plays two hours and a half. IPIQ Drama in Five Acts. Seven males, seven females. Costumes, lIVlO modern ; scenery, three interiors. Plays a full evening. I AnV RniTNTIFITI Play in Four Acts. Eight males, seven LiAUl DV/UlilirULi females. Costumes, modern; scen- ery, four interiors, not easy. Plays a full evening. I I7TTV I>rama in Four Acts and an Epilogue. Ten males, five LiEil 1 I females. Costumes, modern; scenery complicated. Plays a full evening. TUP MAPICTD ATI? Farce in Three Acts. Twelve males, illl!i IViAviliJ 1 IV/\ 1 El four females. Costumes, modern; scenery, all interior. Plays two hours and a half. Sent prepaid on receipt' of price by Walttv H. pafeer & Companp No. 5 Hamilton Place, Boston, Massachusetts Look Out For Paint A Farce Comedy in Three Acts By CORNELIUS SHEA BOSTON WALTER H. BAKER & CO. 1912 c. Lo,f Look Out For Paint CHARACTERS [As originally produced (71 Totienville, N. K, yune g, iQ^i-) Hiram Rodney, owner of " High Up Farm " '"cij^.' , • \ * Percy HE^IiTiJCHE, an "' artist, in love with Rodney s daughter Helen Hickory Homespun, a bashful farmer, who is well to do . . . . . Trot WELL Roamer, a tramp, who is a painter by trade .... Bill, a big, good-natured boy who does the chores ...... Susan Rodney, the farmer s wife Helen Rodney, the farmer s daughter . Hattie Renwick, a stenographer from the city, past thirty and anxious to wed . Lucinda Wheatchaff, a widow in love with Hickory Homespun Mr. Frank J. Dolan, Mr. Benjamin B. Cole. Mr J. J. Malle. Mr. Edward Johnson. Mr. Arthur Parsons, Miss Cecilia Stern. Miss Lena S. Hoehn. Miss Marvel Matthes. Mrs. Willis Larkin. Time : — The present. Locality : — A farm in the upper part of New York State. Time of performance, one hour and a half, \ Copyright, 191 2, by Walter H. Baker & Co, / C(.D 31175 SYNOPSIS Act I. — Dining-room at " High Up Farm." The arrival of the boarder from the city. The two letters. The farmer decides to have his sailboat painted, since the summer boarders have begun to come. Act II. — Lawn at " High Up Farm." Heartache is much per- plexed. Helen helps him fix it. The tramp. The plot. Hattie is surprised. " He has disguised himself to test the depths of my devotion." The tramp tries to escape. Act III. — Same as Act II. An embarrassing mistake. " Look out for paint." Miss Renwick decides that she don't want a husband. The widow wins. Bill settles it all. COSTUMES It will be necessary for Hattie and Helen to change. Hattie is to be stylishly gowned in summer apparel when she enters in first act. Helen to fit the occasion, as a farmer's daughter when at work about the house, and also "dressed up" to receive vis- itors. Bill in ridiculous make-up and big straw hat. Percy in rather dudish style. Roamer in ragged coat and overalls. Hiram as a farmer at work. Hickory "dressed up" a little- Lucinda as a widow just discarding her weeds. Susan with apron, etc. PROPERTIES Churn, table, chairs, benches, etc., broom, feather duster and ordinary furnishings for common sitting-room ; table is set on lawn during intermission between second and third acts Sign, " Cow for Sale." Two paint cans, with brushes. Look Out for Paint ACT I SCENE. — Sitting-room of the ^' High Up Farmhouse.^* Enter Hiram Rodney, drying hands with big, coarse towel. Hiram. So it's city boarders we're going to have, eh? An' one is comin' to-day ! Well, I don't think a whole lot of this pesky business, but Susan got it in her head to take 'em, so I s'pose she's got to have her way about it. Women-folks generally does have their own way, anyhow. I know Susan does; she always has, too. But it's all right. A little cash money from boarders will come in mighty handy, I calculate. It's been so dry that it looks as though the corn crop is going to be a rank failure. An' the hay ( Voices and laughter outside.) Hello! What's this? Bill has brought the new boarder over from the depot, I s'pose. (^Goes to door ate.) Yes, sure enough, she's come. My ! but ain't she dressed up ! Paint an' powder on her face, too ! An' Bill is luggin' in her trunk. Enter Bill, carrying trunk, followed by Hattie Renwick. Bill. Here we are, Mr. Rodney. I found her all right. Ain't she a stunner? I'll bet that dress an' hat of hers cost more'n five dollars, bergosh ! Ain't she Hiram. Shet up, you fool ! Don't you know how to act when we've got company? Hat. (graciously). Oh, don't mind him. I think Bill is just too cute for anything. He is so witty in his conversation that I just enjoyed myself riding over from the depot. {Laughs lightly and glances killingly at Bill, who curtsies and then struts aroufid like a peacock.) So this is High Up Farm, I suppose ? Hiram. Yes, miss, that's just what it is. Be you Miss Hattie Renwick, the new boarder ? 6 LOOK OUT FOR PAINT Hat. Yes, that is who I am, sir. I suppose you are Mr. Rodney ? Hiram. That's me. I'm the boss of this here place- when Susan ain't around, I mean. (^Footsteps at l.) Here she comes now. She'll look after you all right, miss. Susan knows her business. Enter Susan Rodney, from kitchen at l. Hat. Mrs. Rodney, I presume? Susan {bowing and smiling). Yes, that's who I be. You are the young lady come here to board, I take it ? Hiram. That's who she is, Susan. Jest look after her, will you? {To Bill.) Take that trunk up-stairs, Bill, an' hurry up about it. I've got to send you back to the village before you unhitch the mare. I wanted you to do an errand for me, but you went off without me knowin' it. Hurry up now. Bill. All right. I'll git this here trunk up-stairs in a jiffy. {Tries to lift trunk and falls over it.) Gosh ! I missed my hold that time. {To Hat.) Say, miss, there ain't no crockery in this, is there ? Hat. {laughing). No crockery. Bill. Bill. All right, then. (Hiram helps him and the two exeunt with trunk at r.) Hat. {looking about room and breathing a sigh of relief ). What a relief to get out of the crowded, dusty city. I am so glad I am here. Susan. You ought to be, Miss Renwick. There is noth- ing like the dear old country, after all. Shall I show you to your room ? Hat. If you please, Mrs. Rodney. Enter Hiram and Bill, r. Exeunt Susan and Hat., r. Hiram. Now, Bill, I want you to drive over to the village and tell Jim Styles to send a man over here to paint ther boat just as soon as he kin. Since we're goin' ter have boarders, we've got to have the boat so they kin use it on the lake. Tell him it's white paint for the outside an' yaller inside. Don't you forgit, Bill. Bill. I won't. But I'll have to bring in an armful of wood first. I seen there wasn't any in ther wood-box when I come in. LOOK OUT FOR PAINT 7 Hiram. Mighty thoughtful of you all at once. Bill. Say ! but ain't the new boarder a daisy? {Laughs uproariously,') Hiram. Pshaw ! You don't think that city gal would take any notice of you, do yer ? Bill. I don't, eh? That's as much as you know about it. Why, she told me 1 was a fine specimen of a healthy young farmer. {Draws himself up proudly.^ An' she give me a dig in ther ribs, too. She's a reg'lar peach ! {Laughs loudly again.) Hiram. You're a born fool. Bill, an' you don't know it. That gal was jest makin' fun of yer, that's all. \_Exeunt Hiram and Bill. Enter Helen Rodney, with hunch of flowers in her hand. Hel. I see the buggy outside, so I suppose our boarder has arrived. I wonder how she looks? She wrote that she is a stenographer in New York, and the letter was typewritten, too. By the way it read, she must be very much of a lady. Well, as there is no one here now, I'll take my chance to write a note to Percy. I know mother won't object, so I'll invite him over to take tea with us to-morrow afternoon. Percy is just too sweet for anything ; and he is an artist, too ! I hope the new boarder is not good-looking, so there will be no danger of her cutting me out. {Opens drawer in stand and takes out paper ^ pen and ink and writes.) There ! {Holds up note she has written.) That is rather brief, but it will answer the purpose, I know. Percy will be delighted to come, too. When mother and father see him and get acquainted with him they won't mind if he comes often, I am sure. {Reads.) "Dear Percy, come over to-morrow afternoon and take tea with us. Pa and ma will be pleased to see you. Yours lovingly, H. R." {Places paper in envelope and addresses it. Bill is heard whistling outside.) Here, Bill, I want you. Hurry up. (Bill enters on a run and stumbles, throwing an armful of wood on the floor.) Bill {on his hands and knees). What do yer want, Helen? Hel. Get up, stupid. I want you to take this letter to the post-office some time to-day. Bill {taking letter). All right, Helen. I've got to go to ther village right away, an' I'll mail ther letter for yer. 8 LOOK OUT FOR PAINT Hel. Well, see that you don't lose it. Here is ten cents for you. Bill. Hooray I I'll buy a mouth-organ now. Then I'll make some mew-sick around High Up Farm, see if I don't. Helen, you never heard me play a mouth-organ, did yer ? Hel. No ; and I don't wish to hear you, either. Just pick up that wood and be off with you. Bill (^gathering up the sticks of wood^. All right, Helen. I forgot to thank you for this dime. {Puts coin in mouth and then goes off l.) {Exit Hel., c. Enter Hat., r.) Hat. Oh ! Here is pen, ink and paper. Just what I want. I wonder if I could get that simple fellow, Bill, to go over to the post-office ? I must let Percy know I am here. Won't he be surprised ! What a romance, indeed. We have never seen each other, nor even exchanged photographs, but I am sure he loves me, or he would never have answered my second letter after reading my advertisement in a matrimonial paper. When I found High Up Farm was so near the village he is stopping in I could not make arrangements to come here quickly enough. How delightful 1 How romantic ! I'll just write him a few words to let him know I am here. I will ask him to come over to-morrow afternoon. Just think of it ! How romantic it will be ! I am sure I will know him, for I can imagine just how he looks from his letters. And he is an artist, too. Very, very romantic! {Sits down and writes.') There! I think this will do. {Reads.') "Dear Percy: I have just arrived at High Up Farm and will be pleased to meet you here to-morrow afternoon. I know how surprised you will be when you read this, and feel sure that when you see me you will not be sorry you answered my matrimonial advertisement, which was really inserted more in a spirit of mischief than any- thing else. Yours, lovingly, H. R." {To audience.) That ought to land him, if anything will. Since I have decided to get married, I must go the limit. I must land this handsome young artist — I know he must be handsome, for artists always are — and I will surely look my best to morrow afternoon. I wonder where that big booby, Bill, is? (Bill heard whistling outside.) Oh ! there he is now. {Walks to L.) Come here. Bill; I want you. LOOK OUT FOR PAINT 9 Enter Bill, whip in hand. Bill. What do you want, miss ? Hat. When are you going over to the village again ? Bill. Right now. Kin I do anything for yer? Hat. {sealing note in envelope'). Yes; take this letter to the post-office for me. ( Writes address on envelope.) Bill. All right, Miss Daisy; I'll do it for yer. Hat. My name isn't Daisy. Bill. Well, you're a daisy, jest ther same. Hat. {laughing). Do you think so, Bill ? Bill. I don't think so; I know it, bergosh ! Hat. None of that, Bill. I know you don't mean a word of what you say. You are just like the rest of the men. Bill {pulling up trousers and strutting about with chest thrown out). Rest of ther men, eh ? Well, I always thought I was nothin' but a boy yet. But if you say I'm a man, I must be, Daisy. Hat. {handing him letter and piece of money). Here is a quarter for you. Take the letter and be sure and mail it. That's a good boy. Bill {startittg toward i..). Boy, eh? A minute ago I was a man. Well, that's jest like ther wimmen-folks. They say one thing an' mean another. ( Laughs loudly and goes off l. Hat. goes off c.) Enter Susan, r. Susan. Now I suppose I must get dinner ready. The new boarder is most likely hungry, an' I want her to be satisfied. Six dollars a week ain't to be sneezed at these times. {Starts for l., when Hel. enters.) Hel. Mother, I have asked a young man to come over and take tea with us to-morrow. You don't object, do you ? Susan. Young man? You mean that painter you've talked so much about in the last week or two, I s'pose? Hel. Not painter, mother. He is an artist. Susan. Well, ain't a painter an artist? I call him a painter, an' I don't think he amounts to much, though I ain't never set eyes on him. Hel. {taking Susan's face in her hands). Oh, mother, 10 LOOK OUT FOR PAINT you will surely change your opinion when you see him once. He is just too sweet for anything. He is very wealthy, too, and I happen to know that he has more than an ordinary fond- ness for me. Susan {disengaging herself from Hel.), All girls are alike at your age. Well, let him come, if he wants to. I was thinking of inviting the widow over to-morrow afternoon, so Miss Ren wick would have company. Most likely she'll find it rather lonesome here at first. Hick Homespun told your father he was coming over to look at the brindle cow which is for sale, to-morrow afternoon, so it will just come in fine. The widow has set her cap for Hick, an' I've made up my mind to help her along all I can. Yes. Let the painter come over, an' we'll have a httle party. Hel. And we won't say anything about it to father, or the boarder, mother. Let's make it a surprise party, as far as they are concerned. Susan. Very well, Helen. I was goin' to tell your father, but if you want him surprised it's all right. Hel. Where is the new boarder, mother? I haven't seen her yet. Susan. She is up in her room. She seems to be a very nice girl. Hel. Is she good-looking ? Susan. Very. She reminds me of one of them pictures you see in the fashion books. (Starts.) I hear her commg down- stairs now. I'll introduce you right away. Enter Hat., r. Hat. Has Bill gone yet, Mrs. Rodney? I have just dis- covered that I failed to bring my tooth powder with me, and if there is a drug store at the village I want him to get me some. Susan. I'll see if Bill has gone yet. Miss Renwick. {Goes to door at c, and looks out.) There ! he is going now. Hey, Bill! Come back here. You're wanted. {Comes back.) Miss Renwick, let me make you acquainted with my daughter Helen. (Hel., who has been studying the new boarder y advances a step and bows.^ Hat. I am very glad to meet her, I am sure. How do you do, Miss Rodney? {They shake hands. ^ LOOK OUT FOR PAINT II Hel. I am quile well, I thank you. I hope you will like it here at High Up Farm. Hat. I hope so ; but it does seem rather slow here at the start. You see, I am so used to the gay life of the city, with the theatre parties every night or two, and the receptions and balls. It is so different in the country. But I will get used to it, I know. Hel. Miss Ren wick, do stenographers have such enjoy- ment in the city ? They must draw large salaries. Hat. Oh, they do. But of course they don't use their own money for such pleasures. The fellows attend to that part of it — young men interested in Wall Street, and the like, you know. Hel. Oh, I see. It must be delightful to live in the city and be a stenographer. Enter Bill hurriedly from c. Bill. What do yer want, Missus Rodney? You jest stopped me in time. If I hadn't waited to fix ther mare's traces you wouldn't have got me. Hat. {smiling graciously). It is I who want you, Bill. Bill. Oh, it's you, eh, Daisy ? Hat. What did I tell you about calling me Daisy ? Bill. Excuse me. I'll change it an' call you Peach, then. Hat. Stop your nonsense, Bill. {Takes money from purse and hands it to him.) There! Stop at the drug store and get me a box of tooth powder. If you can't get powder, get paste. Bill. An' if I can't git paste I'll git a bottle of mucilage. Hel. The idea. Bill ! Mucilage ! People don't use such stuff as that to clean their teeth. Bill. If they was false it would be good to stick 'em to ther gums. Hat. {sharply). Bill, I want you to understand that my teeth are all my own. Bill. Of course, Daisy — I mean Peach. Whose would they be? If you've got false ones most likely you paid for 'em. Whose would they be? {Goes to door at c, laughing.) But all right. Peach. I'll git ther tooth powder for yer. I won't forgit. I'm goin' to buy a set of clappers with that quarter you give fne afore. Then, with a new mouth-organ an' ther clap- pers, i! ere'll be a regular band of music around High Up Farm. \_Exit, 12 LOOK OUT FOR PAINT Hel. Mother, that boy is getting to be a regular nuisance. The idea of him speaking that way to a stranger ! Hat. Oh ! I don't mind him, Miss Rodney. Bill isn't exactly all right. I noticed that when he met me at the depot. He means no offense, I am sure. His comical actions and re- marks help take away the dullness. Bill is all right. Susan, Well, we've had him ever since he was about ten years old, an' he's always been pretty faithful. I s'pose he can't help it if he's a little loose in his upper story. Most likely he was born that way. Hel. Quite likely, mother. Hat. {sittiftg down). Miss Helen, are there many good- looking young farmers around here ? Hel. There are plenty of young men in the neighbor- hood, Miss Renwick. But as to their good looks, 1 suppose you would be better able to judge than I. You reside in the city, and I presume you see so many handsome young men that you would not think much of those you will meet here in the coun- try. As for myself, I don't care a great deal for farmers. Susan. Shame on you, Helen ! You, a farmer's daughter, talkin' like that. Hel. I can't help it, mother; just because I was born on a farm don't say that I should be a farmer's wife. Hat. Why, I think that would be delightful, provided the husband could give his wife all she wanted. Plenty of fine dresses, a horse and carriage, and a nice automobile. Farmers usually are very wealthy, I have heard. Susan. Well, there ain't many rich ones around here. Miss Renwick. About the only one anywhere around here who's got plenty of money is Hick Homespun, an' his father left it to him. Hick never earned it, though he does know pretty well how to keep it. Hat. Hick Homespun ! What a funny name, Mrs. Rodney. Susan. Yes, it is a sorter old-fashioned name. But Hick is all right, just the same. Hel. His given name is Hickory, but every one calls him Hick, for short. Hat. Is he married ? Hel. No, he is a bachelor farmer. Susan. But he ain't likely to remain a bachelor very long. Lucinda Wheatchaff, the widow, has set her cap for him. She'll catch him, too, for Lucinda has very winnin' ways. She made LOOK OUT FOR PAINT I3 up her mind to get Hank Wheatchaff, an' she jest went ahead an' got him. But Hank didn't live more'n a year, an' when he died he left the widow a nice little farm an' a few thousands in cash. Lucinda will win Hick all right, though he's an awful bashful man. She'll {Kfiock at door c.) As I live ! I believe that's the widow now. I always know her knock. {^Calls out.) Come in. Enter Lucinda Wheatchaff. Luc. Hello, everybody! Isn't this a lovely day? {Sees Hat.) Oh ! excuse me, Mrs. Rodney. I wasn't aware that you had company. Susan {introducing them). Mrs. Wheatchaff, this is our new boarder. Miss Renwick, of New York. Luc. How do you do. Miss Renwick ? We country folks are always glad to meet city folks. Hat. {graciously). It gives me great pleasure to make your acquaintance, Mrs. Wheatchaff. {They shake hands , the widow very demonstrative.) Hel. Lucinda, I was just telling Miss Renwick about Hick. She wanted to know if there were any nice young men around here. Luc. Oh, she wanted to know that, eh ? {Sizes up Hat. critically, and then gives a sniff.) Well, I hardly think Hick Homespun would suit her. Hick has got an awful objection to paint and powder, too. He wouldn't be apt to take to Miss Renwick. Hat. {with sweet sarcasm). Indeed ! Mrs. Wheatchaff, you are very blunt in your way of speaking, I see. But if the gentleman referred to objects to paint and powder, how do you ever expect to win him ? Luc. {holding up her hands in surprise). Me? As if I wanted another man ! I've had one, and I am sure that is enough. {Picks up her parasol and walks about indignantly .) But say! {Pauses before Hat. and shakes parasol at her.) If you think you can get Hick Homespun to take any notice of you, go ahead. I'm sure it is nothing to me. But I don't be- lieve {Loud noise outside, and Hiram enters in great excitement.) Hiram. Susan, get the gun — quick ! There's a big 14 LOOK OUT FOR PAINT chicken-hawk after the old dominick hen an' her chickens. Hurry, Susan ! {Exit Susan hurriedly at r. Hel. grabs a feather duster. Hat. seizes broom which Susan has left itt a corner of the room, and Luc. waves her parasol. Susan enters r. with gun. Then Hiram grabs the gun and all rush out excitedly. Report of gun is heard.^ QUICK CURTAIN ACT II SCENE.^Zawn of the ''High Up Farmhouse ^ Day later. A few chairs and benches scattered about. Churn near side of house. Sign: ** Cow for sale^^ on tree. Enter Percy Heartache, l. Percy (^perplexed). Well, this is a great state of affairs. I don't know how I am to get out of the mess I am in. Who would ever have dreamed of such a thing as that girl I corre- sponded with through the foolish matrimonial advertisement would be here? Why, I never saw her, and I only answered her letters for fun. The idea of her going so far as to come here to board ! It is ridiculous. But to make matters worse {shaking his head sadly) Helen sends me an invitation to come over this afternoon and get acquainted with her parents. The two letters arrived at the same time, and both bear the same initials. {Takes letters from pocket and again shakes his head.') Well {bracing up)^ I made up my mind to come here and make a clean breast of it to Helen, and I came an hour earlier, so I might learn my fate as soon as possible. I wish I could see her without going to the house. Ah ! here she comes now, as I live ! Enter Hel., r. Hurries to the churn and starts churning. Hel. Oh, dear ! I wish the butter would come. ( Churns vigorously.) I won't have time to dress before Percy gets here. The dear fellow. I know he will surely come. (Percy brightens up and steps softly toward her. Hel. has her back to him and has not seen him.) Percy. Ahem ! Hel. \5tops churning and turns). Oh ! is it you, Mr. Heartache ? Percy. Yes, Miss Rodney. I came over a little early, be- cause I have something to say to you. It is of a rather serious nature, and has been worrying me ever since I went to the post-ofSce last night, ( Walks to l.) IS l6 LOOK OUT FOR PAINT Hel. (aside). Gracious ! It can't be that he is going to propose. {Walks toward Percy.) What is it, Mr. Heart- ache? Perhaps 1 might be able to advise you. Percy {brightening up). I am sure you can, Helen — I mean Miss Rodney. 1 surely am in a bad fix. But sit down here and I'll tell you all about it. {They sit upon bench near c.) Hel. Go on and tell me. I am sure your troubles cannot be very great. Percy. Wait until you have heard. Helen — excuse me for calling you Helen Hel. Certainly. To be even with you, I shall call you Percy. Percy. I like that. But let me tell my story. Perhaps after you have heard it you won't want to ever see me again. Hel. Is it so serious as all that? Percy. It surely is. Helen, a month or so ago I was fool- ish enough to answer an advertisement in a matrimonial paper. I did it just for the fun of the thing, you know. Hel. I did the same thing once. A bachelor, whose chief drawing points were that he was bald-headed and had a fortune, advertised that he wished to correspond with a charming coun- try girl who was matrimonially inclined, and I wrote to him. Percy. Ah ! is that so ? Hel. Yes ; but there was no harm in it, was there ? Percy. Certainly not. How many letters did you write to him ? Hel. Only one. I did not answer the one I received in reply, for it seemed as though he meant business, and what did I want of an old bald-headed man, even if he was rich? Percy. Of course you didn't want him. But to be real serious, Helen. The fix I am in at present is all through an- swering an advertisement in a matrimonial paper. I wrote to the young lady twice, and it seems that she took it altogether too seriously. The fact is, Helen, that she is here, and she has invited me to call at your father's house this afternoon. Hel. {rising excitedly). What do you mean ? Percy. Just what I say. Haven't you a young lady stop- ping here? Hel. Why — er — yes. But Percy. Isn't her name Hattie Ren wick? Hel. {completely amazed). Yes, that is her name. LOOK. OUT FOR PAINT I7 \ Percy. Read this note and you will understand it all. \Hands her Hattie's fioie.) I hope you will forgive me, Helen. 1 will never do such a foolish thing again as long as I l\ve. j Hel. {reading note aloud). Well, I declare ! If this isn't a| remarkable coincidence. Why, she must have sent this to the post-office with Bill when I sent mine yesterday. Percy. I received the two invitations at the same time. Imagine my surprise, and my feelings, too, when 1 read them. Hel. Well, I am not a bit jealous of her, Percy. I con- sider this a great joke, indeed I do. Percy. Oh, do you? You are not angry, then ? Hel. Angry ? No. But say, Percy, if you could only get some one to come here and represent himself to be Percy Heartache, what a joke it would be ! Miss Renwick is an old maid, and the way she paints her face is disgusting. Imagine her wanting to marry a handsome young artist ! Why, she is artist enough herself. {Laughs lightly J and Percy, much relieved, joins in,) Percy. I wish I knew how to get out of this. Your sug- gestion is a good one, but who could I get to represent himself to be me ? I suppose I might go back to the village and find some one, though. Hel. {eagerly). Do it, Percy. You can find somebody who would do it just for the fun of it. I will tell mother about it. Here she comes now. Enter Susan, r. Susan. Why, Helen, have you given up the churning? Oh ! you have a visitor, I see. {Smiles and approaches.) Hel. Yes, mother, let me introduce you to Mr. Heartache. He is the young man I spoke to you about — the artist, you know. Susan. So he is the painter, eh? How do you do, Mr. Heartache ? Percy. Quite well, thank you. (^Bows, and then Susan extends hand. Percy accepts it and they shake cordially.) You have a beautiful place here, Mrs. Rodney. High Up Farm is well named. The land is very high and level here and the pure air is simply delightful. The scenery is grand, too, and 1 mean to make some sketches of it, if I receive per- mission to do so. l8 LOOK OUT FOR PAINT Susan. You mean to paint pictures of the trees and such. Percy. Yes, that is it. Hel. Mother, what do you think Hattie Renwick came to board with us for? Susan {surprised). Why, I don't know, unless it was to get away from the city for a while and enjoy herself in the fresh country air. What do you mean, Helen ? Hel. Well, I'll tell you, mother. She came here so she could get acquainted with Mr. Heartache. It seems that he answered a matrimonial advertisement she inserted in some paper, and when she answered him he wrote again, giving his address at the village. She discovered that our farm was right near the village, so she came here. Percy — I mean Mr. Heart- ache — never saw Miss Renwick, and he cares nothing for her, whatever. She had the audacity to Susan. Why, Helen, what do you mean ? Hel. Listen, mother. Let me finish. She had the au- dacity to send Mr. Heartache a note, inviting him here to-day. I invited him, too, as you are aware. Now, he does not want to let the brazen old maid know who he is, and we were just talking and trying to think of some way to play a joke on her. Susan. Weil, if that is why she came to High Up Farm I think she ought to have a joke played on her. I have a notion to go right now and tell her what I think of her. Hel. Don't do it, mother. She is getting along in years, and she no doubt wants to get a husband so badly that she can be excused. What we want you to do is to help us in this. It will only be a little harmless fun, and Percy will be spared the scene that would surely follow if she met him, thinking he had come here for the purpose of meeting her. Percy is going to the village and will try to get some one to impersonate him. Of course it will not be a good-looking young man he will get, either, and there is where the fun will come in. Now, mother, do help us out, won't you ? Susan {shaking her head, as though in douht^. I don't like this kind of business, Helen. But since Mr. Heartache seems to be such a nice young man, an' he is a painter, besides, I'll do as you want me to. The idea of Miss Renwick comin' here for the purpose of tryin' to catch a husband ! Hef,. Oh, mother, I am so glad. Now, then, if a man comes here and is introduced as Mr. Percy Heartache, you will know what to do. Susan. Yes ; I'll call Miss Renwick right away. LOOK OUT FOR PAINT I9 \ Enter Trotwell Roamer, l. Roam. Is this the High Up Farm ? Susan. Yes; what do you want ? Roam, {setting down paint pots and brushes). I'm the painter. Susan {looking at Percy). The painter ? Roam. Yes, ray boss sent me over here to paint a boat for Mr. Rodney. Susan } ,. . >. ^, , TT \ {tn unison). Oh I Percy {smiling at the two). I think this man might fill the bill. Shall I ask him ? Hel. {eagerly). Yes, ask him, Percy. I am sure he would be just the one. He is a painter, too. Think of it! {Laughs,) Roam. Well, maybe I am an artist, then. Does that sound any better ? Hel. Much better, sir. You'll surely do. Roam. Oh ! I'll paint the boat, all right. Where is she ? Hel. In the house. But you don't want to see her yet. Wait until you understand what we want you to do. (Susan goes to churn and begins churning.) Roam, {looking at Percy). What's all this, anyhow ? You ain't tryin' to jolly me, are you ? Percy. Not a bit, my friend. See here ! Do you want to earn five dollars ? Roam. Do I ? Don't I look as though I did ? Why, I've been trampin' for three weeks without findin' a job. I hit the village over here last night an' happened to land with Styles, the boss painter. This morning he found out that I was all right, so he sent me over here to paint a boat. But I didn't think the boat was in the house. {Looks at Hel.) Hel. The boat isn't in the house. Percy, go on and tell him. Percy. Mr. What's- Your-Name Roam. Trotwell Roamer is my name, boss. Percy. Well, Mr. Trotwell Roamer, there is a young lady in the house who is expecting a call from a young man she has never seen. She is looking for a husband, and she will no doubt be dead struck on you, if you take the part. Roam. {looki?ig at his overalls and ragged coat and laugh- 20 LOOK OUT FOR PAINT ing). Well, I don't know why she wouldn't be, boss. But go ahead with your game. Let me see the color of that five-spot first. Then I'll feel more like listenin' to you. Y^\\ Keiley Twelve females. Costumes modern ; scenery unimportant. Plays a*^ hour and a quarter. A humorous picture of the planning of the annua! church fair by the ladies of the sewing circle. Full of local hits and general human nature, and a sure laugh-producer in any communityc Can be recommended. Pricey 2^ cents CHARACTERS Mrs. Roberts, who wants to be Mrs. Lawson, plump, presidsrt. Mrs. Brown, anxious to get new Mrs. Henry, youngs g^^^y* church attendants, fond of novels. Mrs. Addison, very inquisitive. Mrs. Jackson, the president of Mrs. Ridgely, sensitive, the society, Mrs. Otis, on the dinner com^ Mrs. Brett, on the dinner com- mittee, mittee, Mrs, THou^soi^y decidedly clcse^ Mrs. Lewis, the minister's wife, Mrs. DreWj^^j/ married^ THE RIVAL CHOIRS An Entertainment in One Scene By Sherman F, Johnson Seven males, four females. Costumes eccentric ; scenery unimportant. Plays one hour, A novelty in musical entertainments, introducing the old choir and the new in competition. A novel setting for a concert, offering an interesting contrast between the old music and the new. Lots of incidental fun, character and human nature. Sure to please. Origi- nally produced in Meriden, Conn. Price, 55 cents A THIEF IN THE HOUSE A Comedy in One Act By R. M, Robinson Six males, one playing a female character (colored). Costumes modern scenery, an interior. Plays forty-five minutes. A first-class play formaU characters only, of strong dramatic interest with plenty of comedy. A play that can be recommended, in spite of its lack of female characters, to any mdience. Price^ 2^ cents 1 New Plays THE TIME OF HIS LIFE A Comedy in Three Acts By C, Leona Dalrympk Six males, three females. Costumes modern ; scenery, two interiors, or can be played in one. Plays two hours and a half. A side-splitting piece, full of action and a sure success if competently acted. Tom Car- ter's little joke of impersonating the colored butler has unexpected con- sequences that give him "the time of his life." Very highly reconi mended for High School performance. Price y 23 cents CHARACTERS Mr. Bob Grey. Mrs. Bob Grey. Tom Carter, Mrs, Grey^s brother, Mrs. Peter Wycombe, a " personage.*^ Mr. Peter Wycombe, a " pessimist " with a dtgestim^ Dorothy Landon, secretly engaged to Tom Carter, Mr. James Landon, Sr., Dorothy^ s father ; of a peppery dts^sifim^ Uncle Tom, an old colored butler from the South. Officer Hogan, of the Twenty- Second Street Police StatMn- EETHER OR EYTHER A Farce in One Act By Robert C. F. Meyers Four males, four females. Costumes modern ; scene, an interior. Pl»»» thirty minutes. A clever parlor play, similar in idea to the popular " Ol^ ^inate Family.** Sure to please. Price y 75" cents THE MORNING AFTER THE PLAY A Comedy in One Act By Willis Steell Two males, three females. Costumes modern; scene, an interior. Plays twenty minutes. An easy piece of strong dramatic interest, orig« inally produced in Vaudeville by Christy Clifford. Free to amateiirs;; royalty required for professional performance. Price f i^ cents OCT 19 1912 New Entertai nments TAKING THE CENSUS IN BINGVILLE An Entertainment hi One Act Bjy Jessie A. Kelly Fourteen males, eight females. Costumes, modern ; scenery, unim- portant. Plays an hour and a half. One of the always popular go-as-you- please entertainments ; just a lot of laughs strung on a very slender wire of story. Full of eccentric character bits and chances for local hits. A sure success for the laughter-loving. Recommended for church societies or intimate communities. Price, 2^ cents CHARACTERS Census Taker. Rosy Grady, a7i Irish maid. Patrick Malone, a police7?iaii who did7i t want to be exa?n- ined. Bill Watt, not so bright, but still gets ahead of the?ri all. Mr. Harder, chauffeur. Mr. Knott, aeronaut. Mr. Stone, farnur who has rheumatiz. a much m,arried Mr. Single, an editor. ]\Ir. Jepson, a grocer-postmas- ter. Mrs. Sampson, who has a large faynily. Mr. More, an undertaker. Mrs. Murphy, who is proud of her name. Miss Hartley, a teacher. Mr. Sharp, a lawyer who is looking for clients. Tony, a fruit dealer. Mr. Elwood, a 77iinister. Mrs. Stone, a far7ners wife who is afraid she has hook- W 07171. Susie Gibes, who is love-sick. Mrs. Jones, 'W077ia7l. Mr. Saloon, a barber who is "Henglish.'' Dr. Duncan, MRf TiBBETS, who tries to be young. THE DAY OF THE DUCHESS A Farce in One Act By Alice C. Tho77tpson Tvj^elve females. Costumes, modern; scenery, an easy interior. Plays thirty minutes. A clever and amusing little play for all girls, particularly suited for schools because of its number of small parts. Requires only three or four prominent people. Recommended. Price, /J 6ents AN IRISH INVASION A Comedy in One Act By Alice C. Tho7npson Eight females. Costumes, modern ; scenerj', an easy interior. Plays thirty minutes. A very pretty and touching little play with plenty of fun introducing refined Irish characters, old country and new. A most original and effective idea, and sure to please. Nothing coarse and rough about it ; tone high and well suited for schools. Price, I ^ cents B. liJ. Pinero's Plays Price, 50 Kents €acb Min TH ANNFT ^^'^^ ^° -^°^'* ^^*^- ^^-"^ males, five females. l"i*-'"V/ni\,llliEiLi Costumes, modern; scenery, three interiors. Plays two and a half hours. THE NOTORIOUS MRS. EBBSMITH 2Sf " '^^Tt males, five females. Costumes, modern; scenery, all interiors. Plays a full evening. THF PROFTTPATF Playin Four Acts. Seven males, five ***Ei r l\,v/rLiI\jr\i £i females. Scenery, three interiors, rather elaborate ; costumes, modern. Plays a full evening. THF QPHnni MIQTRFQQ Farce in Three Acts. Nine males, IO£i OV/IlV^WLilTilOilVEiiJiJ seven females. Costumes, mod- em; scenery, three interiors. Plays a full evening. THE SECOND MRS. TANQUERAY ^nrlZ^X'i females. Costumes, modern; scenery, three interiors. Plays a full evening. ^WFFT f AVFNHFR Comedyin Three Acts. Seven males, OTiLiCil LlTx Y £ilily£iA, four females. Scene, a single interior, costumes, modem. Plays a full evening. THF THTTNnFRRniT Comedy in Four Acts. Ten males, * lll-i 1 nU 11 LfHixDv/Li 1 nine females. Scenery, three interi- ors; costumes, modern. Plays a full evening. THF TTIVIF^ Comedy in Four Acts. Six males, seven females. ***Li 1 11t1£iO Scene, a single interior ; costumes, modern. Plays SI fuH evening. THF WFAITFR ^FY Cpmedyin Three Acts. Eight males. 1 ri£i TV £ti\IvCiA. OJLA eight females. Costumes, modern ; scenery, two interiors. Plays a full evening. A WIFE WITHOUT A SMILE ^^e^.iS,i'^?4S. Costumes, modern ; scene, a single interior. Plays a full evening. Sent prepaid on receipt of price by l^alter ^. ^aktv S: Companp No. S Hamilton Place, Boston, Massachusetts LIBRf)RY OF CONGRES cult, clii<^-fly interiors : Price, 50 Cents. costumes, modern. Plays a full evening. THE FRUITS OF ENUCHTENMENT THE IMPORTANCE OF BEINQ EARNEST S Comedy in Four Acts. By L.Tolstoi. Twenty- one males, eleven females. Scenery, characteristic interiors ; cos- tumes, modern. Plays a full evening. Recommended for reading clubs. Price, 25 Cents. HIS EXCELLENCY THE GOVERNOR i^^JiTKlHAtf '%?J males, three females. Costumes, modern ; scenery, one interior. Acting rights reserved. Time, a full evening. Price, 50 Cents. MinPAT HIKRANH Comedy in Four Acts. By OscAK Wildk. WLtAl^ lllJJDAlMf Ninemales, six females. Costumes, mod- ern; scenery, three interiors. Plays a full evening. Acting rights reserved. Sold for reading. Price, 50 Cents. ^arce in Three Acts. By Oscar Wilde. Five males, four females. Costumes, modern ; scenes, tAvo interiors and an exterior. Plays a full evening. Acting rights re- served. Price, 50 Cents. LADY WINDERMERE'S FAN ^r.?,^^ "slJS 1fSes,'l^i?l"te" males. Costumes, modern ; scenery, three interiors. Plays a full evening. Acting rights reserved. Price, 50 Cents. KTATHANHATP Play in Four Acts. By Clyde Fitch. Fifteen nAiliiiii uALL< males, four females. Costumes of the eighteenth century in America. Scenery, four interiors and two exteriors. Act- ing rights reserved. Plays a full evening. Price, 50 Cents. Comedy in Three Acts. ByM. B. Horke. Six males, four females. Scenery, two interiors ; costumes, modern. Professional stage rights reserved. Plays a full evening. Price, 50 Cents. Comedy in Four Acts. By C. H. Chambers. Four males, three fe- males. Scenery, an interior and an exterior ; costumes, modern. Acting rights reserved. Plays a full evening. Price, 50 Cents. A WOMAN OF NO IMPORTANCE gS^?r?JrE,^ft'^ai?i; seven females. Costumes, modern ; scenery, three interiors and an exterior. Plays a full evening. Stage rights reserved. Offered for reading only. Price, 50 Cents. Sent prepaid on receipt of price by 5^alter i^. TSafeer & Company No. 5 Hamilton Place, Boston, Massachusetts THE OTHER FELLOW THE TYRANNY OF TEARS 3^ecent popular ^^s THF AWAK'FNINfi -^^^^ "^ -^^"^ "^^*^- -^^ ^- ■^- chambers. ItlLi Att AiiLlllliU i-'our males, six females. Scenery, not diffi- S. J. PARKHILL &, CO., PRINTERS, BOSTON.