J50S X)42.A8 m* tK. b ••W'ai € i fopvrighf}^'' ' ^7 i q COPMRIGIIT DEPOSITS ALTAR FIRES ALTAR FI RES BY RUTH BASSETT EDDY THE CORNHILL COMPANY BOSTON .^"'^ Copyright, 1919, by The Cornhill Company ©CI,A53 5D08 NOV 23 I9i9 ^ IN LOVING THOUGHT OF MY MOTHER CONTENTS Page For Love of You i Last Hours 3 Companionship 4 My Honey 5 Unrest 7 I Love You So 8 Au Desespoir 9 Love's Spring 10 Tell Me To-Night 11 Love's Appraisement ........ 12 Separation 13 Give Me a Kiss, Beloved 14 To A Friend 15 The Past 16 Why Is It So? 17 Fm Tired, That's All 18 Ora E Sempre 19 Love's Moments 20 [vii] CONTENTS Page Our Hour 22 Presentiment 23 My Father 25 And Yet 26 Unconfessed 27 Appreciation 28 His Mother 29 I Told You So 30 Unreconciled 32 My Rose 33 The Traitor . . .34 Phantoms . 36 The Cross 37 My Birthday 38 Our Boys 39 Her Passport 40 He Kissed Her Hands 41 Long Beach 43 Without You 44 Adrift 45 So Dear He Is . 47 [viii] CONTENTS Page The Debutante 48 Night 49 The Optimist 50 The Home- Land 51 The Lost Note 52 Unblessed 54 Broken Friendship 55 I Need Thee 57 Our Game ........... 58 When I Was a Child 60 A Prayer 61 Virginia ........... 63 The Summer Girl 64 Look Down Into My Eyes 66 Night Whispers . 67 Earth-Bound 68 I Shall Not Pass This Way Again .... 69 The Young Wife ......... 70 Contrariness 72 Two Loves 73 To 74 [ix] CONTENTS Page Forsake Him Not 75 Thru the Rain 76 My Heart Is a Like a Harp "jy Give Me the West 78 The Call of You 79 Give Me the Glass 80 Forget You, Dear? 81 Her Reward 82 Doubts 84 The Price 85 The Test of Sacrifice 86 Surrender 87 Uneasy Hours 88 Farewell 89 Their Faith In Me 90 To 91 You Gave Me Violets 92 My Mother 96 [x] ALTAR FIRES FOR LOVE OF YOU For love of you, sweetheart, the sky smiles down Upon a world so wonderful and fair ; Its heart is warm beneath its winter gown — Warm as the sun that through the crystal air Tossing its rays like some exultant king, Laughs in its joy from out God's dazzling blue, Kissing my eyes lest they be sorrowing For love of you, sweetheart, for love of you. For love of you, sweetheart, the stars at night Shake out their gleams above like golden maize. The tender message of the still moonlight Is fraught with stirring thoughts of other days. The world seems waiting — waiting for your voice To send a thrill of life its great soul through; All nature tunes itself unto my choice For love of you, sweetheart, for love of you. For love of you, sweetheart, life's darkest side Has still a ray of hope to light the way ; The birds their secrets to the breeze confide That spring but slumbers and awaits their lay [I] ALTAR FIRES To free the restless earth by ice entombed, And with the vital kiss of early dew To rouse it, like a glorious maid, full-bloomed, — For love of you, sweetheart, for love of you. For love of you, sweetheart, pain sheathes its sting Within the velvet of your faith in me : Above to-day's sharp thorns the roses cling — To-morrow's blooms, from every fetter free. The hours of grim discouragement I bear, For God must give me strength to live them through And I am brave enough to call life fair — For love of you, sweetheart, for love of you. [2] ALTAR FIRES LAST HOURS Stay near to me, my own, I fear the gloom And dread the long, deep shadows of the night ; I fear the coming of the pallid dawn, Its miseries and heartaches yet unborn. I want you near me in the darkened room, And with your lips upon my lips close pressed To say good night — and lay me down to rest. Stay near to me, O love, I need you so To help me keep unbroken that poor trust That feels sore shaken at the battle's cry ! I am too weary now to still defy The bitter promptings of the heart's dire woe. God gave me trust in Him — I've kept it bright All thro' life's struggle — but I fear to-night. Stay near, O dearest of my heart, stay near! Take these two helpless hands within your own And let my tired head lie on your breast; Your arms' dear haven quiets my unrest. So, in this hour, my trust in God I keep And say good-bye — and lay me down to sleep. [3] ALTAR FIRES COMPANIONSHIP If thou wouldst leave the world that men call fair, And delve into its sadder mystery, Go not alone — uncertainty is there, But take thou me. If thou forget thyself and long to go Away from Fortune's smile, which shines on thee- Thro' every grief that 'tis thy fate to know, Oh, take thou me ! And in the sacrifice, if thou shouldst gain A deeper knowledge of the things to be. The saddest lesson in the keenest pain. Oh, teach to me. And if thy mission blessings for thee reap, I ask no share of gifts held dear by thee, If, through the years, e'er sacred thou wilt keep Thy love for me. [4] ALTAR FIRES MY HONEY The heart of me is wanting you, is wanting you, my honey, The soul of me looks to the God you cry to in your prayers To care for you through lonely hours and keep your dear heart sunny, And free from sins that linger near to catch you in their snares. The heart of me is starving for the ripple of your laughter, The light within your happy eyes that makes day's great orb dim. Your wooing voice that prattles on about God's glad hereafter. As if we all were pure as you and blessed alike by Him. The heart of me is yearning for the pressure of your fingers, Like tender doves warm nestling there within this palm of mine; And when you draw your hand away the magic thrill still lingers, And trembles through my warm, young blood and stirs as it were wine. [5] ALTAR FIRES Oh, honey, must these longing arms but empty air be clasping? Or is your dear head weary for a pillow on my breast ? I'd hold the precious burden while a question I'd be asking. And seeking for in eyes that feared their own love to attest. I know your rosy mouth will have to give me brimming measure Of kisses when I bend my head, your shy consent to prove. The heart of me is wanting you, to cherish and to treasure — The soul of me is drooping for the sunshine of your love ! [6] ALTAR FIRES UNREST Where the winds blow soft with a perfume rare, And the wild flowers droop in their rapt delight, Where the hazy stars with a lazy stare Shine down on the vastness of the night — Out with the voice of God's minstrelsy, Tis there I'd be— 'tis there I'd be ! Out of the mad, exultant game With a heart at stake and a love run wild, With passionate eyes and mouth aflame. Into a land that is undefiled; By love unstirred — like a placid sea, 'Tis there I'd be— 'tis there I'd be ! Light as a bird in the fragrant blue Sailing at peace with fleet wings outspread, Joyously trilling the whole day through. Pointing its course where sweet fancy led. Where the world is my own and is God's and is free, — 'T is there I'd be— 't is there I'd be ! [7] ALTAR FIRES I LOVE YOU SO I only want to love you, life at best Is fraught with pain and longing and unrest; But in its love for you my spirit lifts Into joy's rarest ether all life's gifts. You lead the way and I will gladly go And e'er be quite content — I love you so. When you are near, the world bursts from its gloom, And flowers are glad to live and glad to bloom. As placid sea reflects the star-gemmed sky Above its mirror-surface, so do I Reflect within my heart each joy, each woe That comes into your life — I love you so. I live to love while you, but love to live — . You well may take for I — I want to give. The golden sun shines bright on every flower And gives each tree and shrub its golden dower ; Be like the sun — and none will ever know One little flower you shine on loves you so ! [8] ALTAR FIRES AU DESESPOIR There's a place in my heart that I've tried all day To patch and mend with the tools at hand — Pleasure and music have had their way But the wound is there. Do you understand Just the need I have to look in your eyes And feel your lips on my lips to-night? When the warmth of your hand on my own hand lies In my soul there is peace, in my heart there is light. I need your love in my life to stay, And your word's low tone in my longing ear. There's a place in my heart I must mend to-day, For the wound is there and the night is near. Do you feel me close with my empty hands? Can your eyes in mine see the mist of pain? 'Tis the sound of your voice that my heart demands, And the crush of your arms and your lips again ! [9] ALTAR FIRES LOVE'S SPRING The lilt of spring is in the air, The ice-bound brook runs free, The sky, as maiden eyes, is fair, The birds sing happily. The sun its warmth and glory showers Alike on thee and me: The winds call to the sleeping flowers — My heart is calling thee. The joy of life is brief as spring, The sorrow dread and long; Oh, why should my heart be hungering For thee with the robin's song? We have our youth, we have our love. And the world is wide and free — I give my soul to Him above. But I give my heart to thee ! [10] ALTAR FIRES TELL ME TO-NIGHT Tell me to-night whate'er your heart would say, While love is bright. Wait not the dawn of yet another day ! Pleasure and wealth and gain — why, what are they? Only a passing gleam — and then away Into the night. Tell me to-night if aught your heart would say ; For I must know. Hope, like the sun, shines on us but a day. Then follows night — forever and for aye. Dearest of all, so lonely is the way. Wanting you so ! [II] ALTAR FIRES LOVE'S APPRAISEMENT What matters it, dear one, that shadows lie Behind the Ught that sanctifies our day? We cannot always find the smoother way, Or always smile, no matter how we try. The storms and passions in the world's great heart But tend to glorify the after part. So let us live within this blessed hour Since youth is sweet ; for with old age the chance To love and laugh, care-free, is gone ; the power No longer ours to weave youth's bright romance. So now, dear heart, naught in the world is true Except the golden sunlight, God and YOU ! [12] ALTAR FIRES SEPARATION Tell me to-night all that your heart would say, I want to know. Wait not the dawn of yet another day, Shadows of doubt behind the moonbeams play — Gladden my life by loving while you may Now, e'er you go ! Empty my hands — your own are warm and strong, Make mine secure. Kiss me to-night, the morrow may be long, Let your dear thoughts into my being throng ; Make the amen that follows love's sweet song Sacred and pure. What if the morrow never dawn for me? We may not know. Then must to-night be all a life should be — Kisses enough for all eternity, Love deep as ocean binding you and me Ere one must go ! Lift up your face where shines the moon above, Radiant its light ! So must your heart enfold me in its love, So must its light ne'er from my being move, Making our parting in this hour to prove Only good-night. [13] ALTAR FIRES GIVE ME A KISS BELOVED Give me a kiss, beloved, A kiss just for friendship's sake; For the story must be ended. The old-time link must break. To me the friend is dearer Than all the world below — Give me a kiss, beloved, Before I let you go. Give me a kiss, beloved, For my heart is sad to-night; I need your faith to keep me. Your hand to lead me right. I love you. Oh, I love you ! But you will never know ; Give me a kiss, beloved, Before I let you go. [14] ALTAR FIRES TO A FRIEND So you've nothing to say to me, have you? You have said all there is to say! And your thoughts are abstracted and weary- It is I who must smile and be gay. And I've counted the hours till I saw you — Have wished every minute away; But you've nothing to say to me, have you? You have said all there is to say ! There is much that my lips long to tell you, But your eyes take the impulse away; Have you nothing but old commonplaces To brighten the hour-burdened day? And what would you think if I told you The thoughts that within me sway ? But you've nothing to say to me, have you? HAVE you said all there is to say ? I have been so content in your friendship, So warmed by the touch of your hand ; And now in this hour of our parting I grieve that you don't understand ; For friendship 'twixt man and a woman Exacts many tears for its pay — So you've nothing to say to me, have you ? You have said all there is to say ! [15] ALTAR FIRES THE PAST They tell me not to grieve, but to rejoice In the blazing sunlight of to-day; Nor e'er look back to trace the shadowed way Dim thro' the years, dream-haunted by your voice. And I must mourn your dead — forgotten quite ; Cremated in the heat of passion's fire; And every throb of yearning or desire Must die like day before the pall of night. But you, in all your strong and wayward power. Taught me to love you and the world despise. Now in this hour I feel my heart arise And make your teachings balance for your dower. So 't is good-by, for nothing now remains Of all our joy but lees of keen regret; The warm, red sun of yesterday has set, To-day is here — and I must meet its claims. [i6] ALTAR FIRES WHY IS IT SO? Why is it so? I wonder if you know, You, with a man's strange soul that shuts within The strangest blending of romance and woe — That leans toward pleasure but falls into sin. You overstep the line with cool contempt Of virtue's dictates — or a woman's heart. From all that must be reaped are you exempt? Or does the joy of sowing ease the smart? What if I cared? What if a foolish pain Cut deep into my pride because you fell Where you should stand, or lost where you should gain? A woman's love tastes of both heaven and hell ! While I can crush the bitter clutch of grief With youth's gay mask to hide pain in my eyes. You may go free to seek a man's relief From loving bondage that a woman ties. But when the time shall come without our youth. And face to face we question of our love. Then you will feel the shiver of the truth And know the test my heart was made to prove. Yes, you will need me then, when you are old. There'll be no fret of loving bondage then : — Why wait until time tarnishes the gold Of youth's pure confidence in God and men? [17] ALTAR FIRES TM TIRED, THAT'S ALL Don't ask me to smile, my darling, I'm weary, so weary to-night; So tell me some pleasant story, And my spirits will soon be bright. But why is the room so darkened? And why do your tear-drops fall? I want to see everyone happy — I'm tired, that's all. Your hands cling to mine, oh, so fondly. Their warmth gives me courage and life; Your eyes look so pained and so troubled I wonder if danger is rife. Say it over again that you love me. So sweet and sincere your words fall — And life is so dear to me, sweetheart ! I'm tired, that's all. So tired am I now and so sleepy; I wonder if heaven is like this — 'T were surely no fairer, my darling. Bereft of your voice and your kiss ! And would you forever forget me. Were I now to answer God's call? O, stay with me, sweetheart, nor sorrow, I'm tired, that's all ! [i8] ALTAR FIRES OR A E SEMPRE May the hands he has kissed never fold but to bless him, And may fervent the prayer for his happiness be ; May the lips he has kissed e'er be glad to caress him Whate'er holds the future for him or for me. For trials must come e'en in wealth's rare possession, And illness o'ershadow the happiest way; But the eyes he has kissed in love's holy confession Will smile in Ufe's night-time as well as life's day. May the love in my heart like a rose-bud in June time Unfold to the sun of the mellowing years. As lovely at eve as it was at love's noon-time, Perfected by pain and the dew of our tears. For suffering chastens the passion of loving As fire tempers steel in the heart of its blaze. The lilt of that love by my life I am proving, With Faith at the helm o'er the perilous ways. Our eyes will not always be bright with youth's spring- time, For winter must follow the beauty of spring; But the hands he has kissed in love's glorious ringtime, Will point him to God, Who made sacred the ring. [19] ALTAR FIRES LOVE'S MOMENTS We've only a little while to stay And the bright spots are so few; Let us snatch their sunshine while we may, An hour of life — and then away Forever and aye from you. Forever and aye from love, sweetheart, From hope and from joy Til be — For the claims of life hold us apart. And the only bright spot is your heart And the love you offer me. The nectar of life in the golden glass Shows not the dregs below : Shall we take it and drink it or let it pass ? If we drink we must drink to the lees: alas! 'T is better to let it go. rd have no bitter regrets to mar The memory of hours with you — For though you are near me or though you are far, I will love you and trust you wherever you are, So we'll break the glass in two. The red wine flows from the shattered gold Like the blood of my love so rare ; Between us it streams like a barrier cold. Our happiness ever to cling to and hold, [20] ALTAR FIRES And our hands are left empty and bare. For the last faint ray of our hope is dead, But my hands in yours find home — Ah, dear one, give me your lips instead. Let them tell of the love that can ne'er be said In the dreary years to come. [21] ALTAR FIRES OUR HOUR Kiss me once ! I would remember YOU, in all this hallowed hour, When our country's voice is calling. And the women's tears are falling. Let your dear lips, warm and tender, To my own lips give the power And the strength to smile. Remember Hearts are breaking in this hour. Kiss me once ! The years hereafter May be full of joy and laughter, But this hour of death's close breathing Must forever leave its chill. Look into my eyes and see there All the love I know to be there ; Let me smile as you are leaving That you may think of me so — There's the bugle . . . Hear it calling? See, the women's tears are falling — Kiss me ! Kiss me once — and GO. [22] ALTAR FIRES PRESENTIMENT The beauty of the Orient country holds No charm to me, my own, beside your face; The depth of passion in your dear gray eyes Tortures reserve until, worn out, it dies And leaves me free love's offering to place Upon the altar which your heart enfolds. To-day the first faint chill of sombre clouds Must augur of a future desolate: I know no joy that round you does not cling, And with you near my every care takes wing. I love you, is it just that we should wait? I love you, should we wrap our souls in shrouds ? If loving you is crime, then may I know No virtue in this world. So dear you've grown The skies become effulgent in your joy. The day is drear when ills your life annoy ; If we could look ahead when years have flown, Would we regret the seeds of love we sow? Would you and I regret the past and prove That our blind love had darkened present days ? What tho' the years shall shut the sun away? They cannot take the light of yesterday : And in our very sorrow I give praise To that kind fate that taught us how to love. [23] ALTAR FIRES And so, dear love, while yet the twilight stays. Take me within the shelter of your arms. Again to lay my head on your dear breast, Within this hour of parting there to rest: And kiss me, dear, to still the dread alarms That hang like clouds o'er all our future days ! [24] ALTAR FIRES MY FATHER He was so ever gracious to mankind — The little child, the beggar at his door, And e'en the miser, pouring o'er his gold. Received alike his faith from day to day. And now that he is gone, I even find My harsher judgment checked to ponder o'er The greater wisdom that his trust foretold; For all men mourned him when he passed away. [25] ALTAR FIRES AND YET The time has come when we must say good-bye ; Our dream of love is o'er, and you and I Think now it will be easy to forget ; We can dismiss the past, I know, and yet — Long since I've felt the parting of the ways; Your smiling lips dissembling in their praise Of little things we loved. I've no regret — I am not sad, — I do not care, and yet — Please look not at me with pain's chilling mask Upon your face. I shall not call to task The passion long since stilled, nor beg, nor fret; My heart is dead to love, to you, and yet — The grass is wet beneath my feet, the dew Is faUing fast. I turn my eyes on you And tho* the burning tears my lashes wet I am not sad,— 't is weakness, perhaps, and yet — We meet to-night as strangers, you and I Who once knew love in all its potency. But go your way, I soon can you forget — Love lies quite dead, 't is well for us to part, and yet — [26] ALTAR FIRES UNCONFESSED I have listened to all nature's voices of song, The soft, laughing brook and the full-throated bird; I've listened and waited the weary day long. But in all of the musical raptures I've heard Not one strain has power or has passion to move you Like the simple confession — I love you, I love you. O, you who are over the great ocean wild, Are your gray eyes still brooding o'er memories of old? When our cold hands clasped tensely — our traitor lips smiled, And we parted, both leaving our story untold? By the dear land you tread, by the blest stars above you, I would you could know how I love you — I love you! [27] ALTAR FIRES APPRECIATION Truth's light is in your eyes, Steadfast and clear, Full of love's mysteries. Making them dear. And in your grave respect No thought is derelict ; Judgment so slow and wise Must be sincere. Harsh tho* you sometimes are In candor's cause, Never, lest trust you mar. Rings false applause. So, when your dear lips press Mine with a long caress, Love seems, with outspread wings, O'er us to pause. [28] ALTAR FIRES HIS MOTHER I let him go with Youth still in his eyes — I let him go Where lovely women laugh and men are wise. Into the hard old grind I turned his feet That life might fit him its demands to meet ; I loved him so. When he came back I saw the Man-look there- And felt no joy. To question this tall man I did not dare. So, for a breath, we stood a length apart — Then, eagerly, I caught him to my heart ; He was my Boy ! [29] ALTAR FIRES I TOLD YOU SO I told you so ! And now, when pain demands its bitter part, Why bow your head and take it thus to heart? Before your grief I warned you to beware, But you — you seemed too confident to care. Now why lose faith and let your courage go? Remember, long since this, I told you so. I told you so ! I whispered of the eyes whose subtle gleam Filled all your life and made home perfect seem; I spoke of lips too red and full to crave For one man's kiss. Such beauty could not save Its charm for you — too brilliant was its glow. Why did you not beUeve ? I told you so ! I told you so ! My friendship for you prompted me to see Her restless life which made its strange decree Of secret joy. You looked so calmly on, So good, so sure, the all-forgiving one, My words sprang forth in all their bitter flow: So blame ME if you must, I told you so. I told you so ! But now, since she has gone and left you free. With swift belief you turn anon to me, [30] ALTAR FIRES So broken and so pale beneath your smile My heart turns cold, in just this little while You feel the truth and rally from the blow. I would have saved you this — I told you so. I told you so ! And in your pain you look to me and ask The way to turn, and such a grievous task Must fall on one who knows, thro' love of you. Just how to tell the false part and the true. And in the years to come much joy you'll know- I love you — tho' I should not tell you so. [31] ALTAR FIRES UNRECONCILED Speak not of yesterday, the buried past Must ever quiet lie, and still and cold; The tears I shed, the longings and regret. Seemed far too bitter and too sharp to last. Such poignant grief must loose its iron hold; I cannot smile — since I cannot forget. Speak not of yesterday, its gloom and chill Creep o'er my life and snatch away my sun. I struggle to be brave — hope must not die, — But memories of the past their claims instill; Its loving, radiant day had but begun ! And on its grave my youth and courage lie. 132J ALTAR FIRES MY ROSE My Rose, sweet Rose. Gracefully tripping away she goes, Light is her laughter, but lighter her toes ; Sweet and inviting the glance that she throws Over her shoulder at me, dear Rose — Dear Rose ! My Rose, shy Rose. Fain would I to you my love propose, Only your saucy smile too plainly shows How such a love would be brought to a close- Deep tho' its passion and faithful, my Rose, My Rose ! But Rose, Oh, Rose, When soft around you the moonlight flows And in your heart its serenity throws. Think then of me as a love-token blows From unseen lips to you, my Rose — My Rose! [33] . ALTAR FIRES THE TRAITOR Cupid came to me in the long ago And asked me to play in the game of love. He seemed such a wee little sprite, you know, That I could not refuse him and let him go. So I joined in the game my own skill to prove. We began with laughter and jests and fun, And we matched our wits with keen delight. We stopped not to reckon who lost and who won ; In the barter of heart-throbs the truth we could shun While we waged such a glorious fight. But I soon caught the power of the challenge he sent And my soul was the stake in this Love-game of chance. Every parry and thrust in our tournament Stirred my blood to fire, for I knew he rent With a master hand in each slow advance. So I cautioned Cupid to play me fair, But he smiled with eyes that knew Love's game thro' To the bitter end and he did not care Now the game was won, so he left me there And was off for another maid to woo. On my knees I begged for the soul I'd lost ; Every other trophy he well might hold, — [34] ALTAR FIRES But his young eyes laughed : I could count the cost Thro' the years to come. Then to me he tossed Just an empty heart — and the tale was told. Oft since he has passed with his arching bow, But beyond the reach of my longing cry. Still I feel the sting of his arrows go To the smarting wound of the long ago, — And I bow my head till he passes by. [35] ALTAR FIRES PHANTOMS I do not know just what it could have been That spoke of you out of the dormant past — A strain of music, perhaps, — a breath of flowers That brought you back with all the hallowed hours. And storming o'er the present came at last The old, old longing for your touch again. O, I can smile and meet each budding day With courage to go through until the night; While those around me, in their happiness. Make darker, far, the way in my distress. But when the shadows come, it is my right To seek the solitude — to grieve — and pray. And know you, where you are, each hour is rife With memories of you while there is life. And when death comes — But no. See, I can smile And sing and dance . . But wanting you the while ! [36] ALTAR FIRES THE CROSS 'T is better so, perhaps, 't is better so, That I should bear this cross while I am young. To learn to look into men's eyes and know The tragedy that lies behind their smile. Yet must I feel that every song that's sung Has tears behind its sweetness all the while? Like Saint Helena, bearing up her cross So patiently, maybe I, too, shall know The beauty of unburdening the dross Of life's late offering in this, my youth, And have, from out the pain, rich blessings grow. And know through years to come the eye of truth. And so, 't is better, perhaps, my cross to bear While I am young — but happy were the years When laughing lips ne'er offered up a prayer. And laughing eyes knew not the smart of tears. [37] ALTAR FIRES MY BIRTHDAY My birthday! Time, go back a little space! Must all the pretty toys of yesterday Be sadly stored within the sacred place Where all the dreams of happy childhood play? The dear old dolls of cloth and wax and wood Accuse the hands that drop them, one by one, Within the casket of my babyhood. The lid must close before the coming sun Of that maturity that does this day Forbid the frolics of the long ago. Or was it long ago? Or just a way Adown the hours a little while or so? [38] ALTAR FIRES OUR BOYS They put on pride with their uniforms, They took up grit with their guns ; From the calm of peace in the homeland, To the throb of war with the Huns. From the light and warmth of their favorite club. To the line of the rank and file; From the kiss of love with a trembling lip. To the kiss of death — with a smile. They took their youth as a bond to give In reply to their country's call ; The shine of their names will forever live. To be honored and loved by all. Those who came back to heart and home We know will understand The grief and love for those who sleep Within a foreign land. [39] ALTAR FIRES HER PASSPORT It was so strange a thing that she could smile : So many griefs were tugging at her heart And begging for a place. Each little while She cautioned them in whispers to depart, Lest lips and eyes should falter at their task And fail to do their bidding at the last. But even in the whispering, her voice Lost nothing of its cheerful, sweet control. She would not lay down arms. It was her choice They had left empty chambers in her soul. Since she had set him free to go his way Why linger in a stormy yesterday? So wonderful a thing her smile could be — With tears behind its glory. Like the sun Caught laughing o'er the troubled waves at sea. O, she had loved him fondly ! That was done And blotted with the past. Alone was she. But where she went the world gave her a place Because she wore a smile upon her face. [40] ALTAR FIRES HE KISSED HER HANDS He kissed her hands ! There, in the dim-ht hall, where other men Had kissed her lips, He paused as if to say a last good-night, So boyish and sincere. Before she knew quite his intent, she felt The pressure of his fingers round her own And then He kissed her hands. She'd had no thought of him before but in A casual way. His voice, perhaps, was softer than the rest, His smile A bit more sweet. But never after he had gone away Did aught within her being cry for him. She just forgot until, perchance, he came — All but that night He kissed her hands. But when the little silence fluttered down Between them as they stood, And she looked up to find his eyes on hers- She caught her breath [41] ALTAR FIRES To find her heart was really beating so. And when he bent That sleek, young head of his above her hands And his warm lips touched softly on her palms- Another feeling, sweetly new, awoke To sway her with the passion of its call. She felt she loved him when He kissed her hands. [42] ALTAR FIRES LONG BEACH A stretch of sandy beach lies smooth Beneath the darkening, evening sky. A growing moon peeps through the clouds And shrouds itself in mystery. The night-birds cry along the shore, The giant waves roll slowly in And break with hissing, whitening spray, Receding noisily again. The sombre clouds, grey-flecked and chill, Drift toward the moon and catch its light To throw the pallid, ghostly gleam Across the darkness of the night. As here upon the beach we stand And dream our dreams 'neath nature's spell, No warning comes to tell our hearts That we are saying our farewell. But let the ocean sing its song — In years to come we shall forget We ever stood and listened here To all its sighings of regret. [43] ALTAR FIRES WITHOUT YOU So glorious the days — yet sad my heart. I call your name and echos mock my cry. I cannot think of you from home apart — The little home we worked for, you and I. It was so short a time to take from life Full measure of its joy. We could not hear In happiness like ours the threat of strife; Nor could we feel the parting that was near. For had we known it, every little thing Would have been treasured since it was the last; Each smile, each word — so worth remembering. Each kiss a sacrament for kisses past. Now morning dawns without you. All the day I want you so in each remembered place. I work the lonely, dragging hours away With constant longing just to see your face. When twilight comes — its shadows deep and black Without your voice to help me find the light — O, dearest, dearest, would you but come back To hold me close and kiss me once good-night ! [44] ALTAR FIRES ADRIFT I went away from home without a heart. The heart of me was torn in Httle bits And buried in the graves of those I loved. And so I wandered from the fold alone And looked at men with speculative eyes. No wealth of purse was mine to arm my soul With lovely hopes against the want of love. No kindred put their tenderness on me Like holy drops. Yet deep within my eyes There burned the beacon for a human love. And as I wandered out into the world, Men turned and looked with warmest of sympathy, While women, love-wrapped, hurried on their way And left me starved — I, who had always known The solace of affection and a home. So, as I gazed ahead toward life's gray road, The flood-gates opened over my restraint; Men, seeing, looked at once with keener zest Than warmth of sympathy within their glance. Their look had all the eager call for mate. [45] ALTAR FIRES And elemental urge of youth and sex Made me return their glance, but barring still The yield of all that pride and birth had taught. But lonely is the way, and dark — and long . . . I hesitate — with speculative eyes. [46] ALTAR FIRES SO DEAR HE IS Father in heaven, so dear he is to me, So very dear! Helpless am I to lead him unto Thee, Laggard his feet in path of right would be; Speak in his heart through nature's minstrelsy ; Make him sincere! Father of all, stretch out Thy rod of love Over his head. Teach him Thy way — its beauty to him prove. Life's petty sins set Thou his thoughts above, Judgment suspend — Thy blessing from me move To him instead. Weak is Thy child temptation to defy; Help him to go Over rough ways when danger lurks near-by. If we be judged by weakness there on high, Give me his cross — for weaker far am I, Loving him so! [47] ALTAR FIRES THE DEBUTANTE The pale wine bubbles in the glass Like amber shot with fire ; So clink with me and drink with me To what we most desire. May all the gifts be yours, my lass, Of all the gods above, For I'm in love with you, — alas ! But you're in love with Love. The wine of hope is all astir Within my veins to-night. So smile with me and wile with me The hours that yet are bright. By every cross I bear for you Devotion will I prove : Oh, I'll love you my whole life through- Though you're in love with Love. Your lips are sweeter than the wine, Your eyes are far more bright : But for one kiss I'd give the bliss Of countless years to-night. The soul of me through love of you Is close to God above. Child, to your innocence be true While you're in love with Love! [48] ALTAR FIRES NIGHT It creeps upon us unaware, Mysterious with sleep : We feel its potency of rest As trees soft good night speak. Each firefly lights its little torch And on its mission goes, To see that every flower's head Is bent in sweet repose. A drowsy dark enfolds us close; The ocean's distant roar Is singing strange, wild luUabys Unto the wave-washed shore. We lay aside the fret of day — Our troubles we dismiss; And sleep drops down on silent wings To bless us with her kiss. [49] ALTAR FIRES THE OPTIMIST Laugh with me, quaff with me, make merry chaff with me, Fill up your glasses and raise them with mine. Drink to the nearest one, aye, and the dearest one, I give you Pleasure, and pledge it with wine. Think not of sorrow, nor yet of to-morrow. Bask in the sun of the Present's bright smile ; Woes will come, foes will come, what, no one knows will come, Laugh while you may and make merry the while. What is ahead of us, who will instead of us Revel to-morrow, light-hearted and free? Warm life is calling us, beauty enthralling us. Now is the time, lads, for you and for me. We've time without measure, let's give it to pleasure ; My secret's are yours and your secrets are mine ; Up with your glasses, lads, drink to the lasses, lads, I give you Love, and I pledge it with wine. [50] ALTAR FIRES THE HOME-LAND Skies are sunny clear above me, Birds are merry in their lay, Tender hearts are near to love me On the rough, uncertain way; But the path is long and dreary For my laggard feet to roam ; Of the garish day I'm weary — Father, Father, take me home. I can hear the ceaseless laughter Of the world so gay and light; Pleasure — with no grim hereafter, Day — without an endless night; And the babble of the living Mocks those in their silent tomb; While my heart is yet forgiving. Father, Father, take me home. Lips are selfish of their kisses If I hunger for their touch; Loving words my sad heart misses If I want them over-much; Like a child grown tired of playing, For Thy solace overcome. Lest my feet from Thee be straying. Father, Father, take me home. [SI] ALTAR FIRES THE LOST NOTE I listened to the thrilling of a flute Mid cornet's notes and trombone's solemn bass; The shrilling fifes led on the dancing race Of skipping measure as I listened, mute. I heard the drums — their constant rumble wrote Upon my heart a vague and dull unrest; For in the crash of blended music's zest I felt in some vague way, a missing note. The passion of its call was gay and flaunting, Behind the grandest chords I felt the strain Of sympathy suspended, like the wanting Of that low cry that warns the heart of pain. As in a boyish choir one hears the sweetness But sung as children sing — above the heart; It's tuneful, like the birds, but so apart From human love, that goes to make completeness. I looked into your eyes, your eyes of brightness, I sought your soul — but in your steadfast gaze I caught but admiration and the praise Of witty lips, that injured by their lightness. I touched your hand, your quiet fingers proving A swift response unto my mute appeal; And yet I wondered if you, too, could feel The broken bond, — the missing note of loving. [52] ALTAR FIRES But now the music's crash dies down to quiet, And one low strain from vioHn comes streaming In sobbing breath with love and pity gleaming, And all my youth's swift blood is running riot. You bend your head — I feel your warm breath near, The violin sings on in saddened sweetness; And with the music's passionate completeness Your lips touch mine, — the missing note is here. [S3] ALTAR FIRES UNBLESSED Oh, God, here on my knees, I pray to Thee! My heart is sore beset, my empty hands Are reaching heavenward in their earnest plea. In that rare power of Thine that understands The fret and worry of the long, dark way, Forgive Thy child an erring yesterday. But point the way. Oh, Father, and my feet Will blindly go — and leave the rest to Thee. My starving soul within is incomplete Without Thy blessing, long denied to me. A stranger oft to prayer, dear God above, Make me to-morrow holy by Thy love! [54] ALTAR FIRES BROKEN FRIENDSHIP Last night! and yet it seems so long ago I wonder if I ever called you friend, And shared with you life's pleasures and life's woe. Our friendship was so deep, so kind, so true — In light or shade I always turned to you And found relief and comfort in your smile: And yet, in just this bitter little while Distrust and doubt our faith and love transcend. Why could we not o'erlook the few defects Which nature gives, nor spares their glaring shame? A friend who's true another's faults ejects. Our confidence exchanged was far from wise, For failings grow when brought before the eyes And bear ill fruits for both one's self and friend ; A man will e'er his own mistakes defend. And in that same defence will blindly flame. The rose is fair, as was our trust's belief; But if that perfect flower we rudely rend Because we see a stain upon its leaf, Where is the flower we erstwhile called so fair? Scattered and dead, in all its beauty rare: And thus it is with too exacting friends ; Regret for what is done ne'er makes amends — A friend can't stand in judgment o'er a friend. [55] ALTAR FIRES Far better were it if this after part Were pain and storm and tears as follow love, And not this dull unrest within the heart. One little explanation left unsaid, And yet we stood there stern and mute instead. I would I'd never shared your friendship's trust And learned its worth to see it burn to dust. Misunderstood in what it failed to prove. [56] ALTAR FIRES I NEED THEE Take Thou my hand, my Father, take my hand, Lead me away in safer paths to tread; Danger is here, in subtle beauty flowing, Warmly alive, with all enticements glowing; Teach me belief in all that Thou hast said, Help me Thy ways of right to understand. I am alone and longing for Thy blessing, Make me to feel all confidence in prayer; Life is not sweet with savor in the living, Loving or loved, forgiven or forgiving. In every joy I feel a want is there — Is that want Thou, and is the joy confessing? [57] ALTAR FIRES OUR GAME We are playing a game of loving, How long is the game to last? We have matched our skill and had our fill, And the charm of the sport is past ; Is there aught that's amiss in the pastime, Now the gamut of pleasure is run? Was either one playing in earnest, Or were both of us playing for fun? Do you wish the game forgotten. With the lilt of its laughter and fears? Let us give and take — just for friendship's sake, A kiss, to forget the tears. And let us return the tokens. You say it is easily done; Ah, but one was contending in earnest, Tho' the other was playing for fun. You ask if the game is over — Why, to me it was but begun; I thought that you would be sorry, too, Tho' the sport was just for fun. All we cared was to fill the moments. But we've wasted the whole day long: Had we known one was playing in earnest. Would the game have been free from wrong? [58] ALTAR FIRES We are both of us mute at parting, — It is hard to say good-by. As you take my hand, do you understand Which is victor, you or I? But your lips have been schooled to laughter. No matter how luck did run : But which played the love-game in earnest. And which of us played it for fun? [59] ALTAR FIRES WHEN I WAS A CHILD When I was a child I thought the Hps Were made but to smile in life's happy sun : And laid them by in my youthful bliss : And I counted my blessings, every one, I knew not, I knew not that lips could kiss Till the passion and gladness of life were gone- When I was a child. When I was a child I thought the eyes Were to see the world in its splendid years Of arrogant bud that lifts and cheers Every soul to wish to be good and kind. I knew not, I knew not eyes could go blind With the sting of pain and the smart of tears — When I was a child. When I was a child I thought my heart Was for praising God in His home above; I bent the knee every night to prove That my soul rejoiced in its youthful trust ; I knew not, I knew not that woman must Heed the call of a heart in its first great love — When I was a child. [60] ALTAR FIRES A PRAYER Dear God, at night I do not kneel Beside my bed to pray — I ask not that Thy blessing rest Upon me thro' the day. I make no claim upon Thy grace That it may shelter me — And yet when earthly comforts fail, I always turn to Thee. The church that's sacred to Thy word — I am a stranger there ; Tho 'all Thy handiwork I love, I voice it not in prayer. But let life's troubles come to me. No matter how or when. My soul cries out alone to Theej I feel I need Thee then. I know no framing for the words My heart cries out to say, For all my life Thy heavenly grace Has seemed so far away. But wilt Thou hear the stranger voice That bares my soul to Thee? And wilt Thou send from out Thy heart A gift of love for me? [6i] ALTAR FIRES My petty griefs I've borne alone, Nor to Thee dared to bring ; But in my keener anguish, Lord, Unto Thy cross I cling. And may its sacred arms uplift My erring soul to Thee, Transformed in blessed purity Throughout eternity. [62] ALTAR FIRES VIRGINIA Virgin in soul and white in mind, Child of the God of all mankind, May your sacred lips and your baby eyes Teach my weary heart where grief's solace lies. Worry and care with their haunting cry In my tired brain as each day goes by Turn to joy and peace as I watch you play, And your happy laugh steals the heart away. Oh, I pray thro' my boundless love for you That the God above will keep you true To the call of life that knows no pain In the harvest's sweep of the year's rich gain. And God's sacrament in your gentle touch On my life that is restless over-much, Makes me cry to Him to keep you good In the beautiful strength of your babyhood. [63] ALTAR FIRES THE SUMMER GIRL She is only a summer girl, I thought, As I called her fair and pressed her hand; Too pretty and young to understand All the pain of life — love is yet untaught; Sweet and content and as flawless as pearl — Just a gay little, stray little summer girl. We walked by the sea when the moon was bright While the night was warm and the winds were still ; And I felt in my veins a tender thrill So I took her hand with a lover's right. But the scorn of her mirth with impetuous whirl Made me laugh at and chaff at the summer girl. In the sunshine where gold in her hair I could trace She would stand by my side in her fresh, laughing youth ; And the heart in me hungered to tell her the truth. As I held her dear hands and looked down on her face. But she, with a smile and a toss of a curl Was a shy little, spry little summer girl. But there came a time when the cold winds blew, And summer was going — alas ! too soon ; I had learned to love zephyrs and gentle moon — [64] ALTAR FIRES I had found many things fair and sweet that I knew. I had learned to love, with her beauty and twirl My coy little, toy little summer girl. I told her I'd miss her and begged her to say We need never part in the long years to come : But with lips on my Hps yet she bade me to roam And leave it to chance if we crossed in our way. And I know — now I know that hope did not unfurl In my queer little, dear little summer girl. Years passed. One day in a city street A dreary procession passed solemnly by; I sorrowed for those who were sad, nor knew why. But I followed the mourners with slow, aimless feet. As I gazed through the throng toward the altar's bright gleam, The face of my summer girl rose like a dream. And ere the sweet vision could pass from my mind I found myself gazing upon her — once gay, Now white and so still in her casket she lay. And others were sobbing whom she'd left behind. Mid the turbulent sorrow of life's dreary whirl God had given his peace to my dead summer girl. [65] ALTAR FIRES LOOK DOWN INTO MY EYES Look down into my eyes to-night — deep down, So that my soul to your dear soul shall speak. Let but this silent message pass between Ere lips from lips the parting kiss must seek. This is no time, my own, to grieve and cry That fate has cheated us of our just due; It is enough that I can hold your hand Before you go away — and comfort you. For parting-time is older than the sun; And lover's grief is part of life's great plan. So smile, my love, and tell me we have won. Look long into my eyes — and be a man! [66] ALTAR FIRES NIGHT WHISPERS The night is warm — she feels the fragrant air And draws a breath that thrills deep thro' her veins, So full it is of all of life that's fair; And all the depth her woman's soul contains Breathes out its glow in soft, sweet cadence there. Her heart is free as is the gentle wind That murmurs in the tree-tops o'er her head; Relentless fate is often over-kind — And to her ne'er a warning word has said That love full-blown means love to-morrow dead. [67] ALTAR FIRES EARTH-BOUND Oh, my Father, do Thou spare Thy child Yet a Httle while to live the day To the evening's close. The morning wild Full of youth's vain dreams has passed away; And the noon, in all its lurid glow, Taught its bitter lessons long ago. Standing here, upon the brink of eve, Let me live to trust Thee — and believe. Let me live to place upon Thy throne That bright star of love Thy children give — For I wandered from the fold alone. Till I find the Homeland, let me live! Father, I am now so near the night. Give me strength to battle for the right : Let my tired feet no longer roam — Father, bless me, ere Thou call me Home. [68] ALTAR FIRES I SHALL NOT PASS THIS WAY AGAIN Let the wine be red, let the wine be old, I shall not pass this way again; Youth's but a day when all is told. Old age is long and slow and cold; Now my blood is warm and my step is bold, So my glass of wine to the lees I'll drain, — For I shall not pass this way again. Let your eyes meet mine with a glance that's kind, I shall not pass this way again ; And all of the years I leave behind I shall count as lost if they did not bind Both our lives with a joy that is hard to find, Joy made secure by Love's golden chain; For I shall not pass this way again. Let your song be light, let your song be gay, I shall not pass this way again ; Sing the cares and the heartaches all away. Let us live in the NOW, not the yesterday, For to-morrow's dawn may be chill and gray. Give me measure of love for each measure of pain,- For I shall not pass this way again. [69] ALTAR FIRES THE YOUNG WIFE Dear little girl with the sad young eyes, Why grieve in your youth that an idol raised On your girlhood pedestal shattered lies, By your woman's wit justly now appraised? An idol can love and then hasten away — But the love of a husband lasts more than a day. Did you think the lover would last for aye, With the soft caress in his ardent eyes? Has the husband now laid the cloak away, And shown you the man in a different guise? He is young and sincere. O, I pray, let him be ! Don't encourage deceit and a feigned gallantry. Maybe, who knows, in his big, boyish heart. He misses the playmate of love-making days ! The solemn young wife is of mystery part. With her great wistful eyes and her strange little ways. He's been petted, like you, by a mother's fond smile : Take him just as he is and be patient awhile. Little girl, little wife, while it's Spring in your life. Be content with the BOY, for he loves you in truth. There is time, ample time, when a measure of strife Will bring tenderness forth — at the cost of his youth. [70] ALTAR FIRES But life teaches these lessons thro' heartaches and tears ; Learn to laugh in the Spring ere Life's Winter ap- pears . Time will come, little girl, when grave sorrows will trace Troubled lines round his mouth and his cheerful blue eyes : And the look of the MAN in your husband's dear face Will arise o'er the grave where his dead boyhood lies. In the heart of the woman God gave him to hold ! [71] ALTAR FIRES CONTRARINESS My eyes admire all beauteous things in life Without reserve or stint of spoken praise ; My courage shuns no battle or no strife When you stand not at parting of the ways. But with you near my eyes grow selfish, shy Of admiration voiced — so weak am I. I often bend and touch the silver stream With eager lips to feel its cool repose; Among fair blooms I sit full oft and dream With cheek close pressed to clematis or rose ; But your dear mouth, with all its power to sway, I fear to kiss — and give my heart away. I love the sunshine with its happy gleams Of glad, warm gold o'erspreading earth and sky ; I love the moonlight with its softer dreams That fold me round with holy mystery; My heart to you alone of all the rest Withholds confession — and I love you best. [72] ALTAR FIRES TWO LOVES You and I — just you and I ; Love like ours ne'er reasons why, While youth's sunshine drowns the cry Of death and pain and misery. You or I — which, you or I? It is time that one must try To fling aside the sullied tie That makes our love a mockery. You, not I — 't is you, not I Who laughs to scorn the woman's cry For love uplifted, lest it die And breaks her heart in her good-bye. [73] ALTAR FIRES TO Dearie, dearie, life has grown so cold, So empty for the constant want of you : Lonely hours and haggard days and old — My heart, across death's claim, to you is true, It reaches out for all you meant to me In love's short hour of life's eternity. Dearie, dearie, can you ever know. All the pain, the mockery of life, Since you went away, so long ago? All the battle with myself, the strife To feel God knew 't were best for you and me To call you first in death's grim tragedy? Life around me, every little place. Breathes of you and holds me with your power; Haunted, dreamlike, by your voice, your face. Death I fear not, since I feel your right To guide me through the darkness to the light. [74] ALTAR FIRES FORSAKE HIM NOT He is Thy child, O, God, — Thy child to-day As in the years long gone when Thou didst breathe Thy hallowed life within his baby frame, And give him power to live and power to pray — And power to suffer, too, and power to grieve In days to come, as now. So, since his heart Is hardened by the stab of Fortune's hand, Into his soul Thy peace and love impart. Guide Thou his thoughts — and make him understand. Bitter he stands on life's uncertain way — God of my fathers, teach him how to pray ! [75] ALTAR FIRES THRU THE RAIN I love you so, I love you so to-night ! The steady rain is slashing on the pane — The winds, let loose, are howling in their might; I am alone — and wanting you again. The glitter of these luxuries of mine Offend my eyes since you have gone away : The little wooded spot I've made my shrine Where you and I declared our love one day. Why was I not content with love and you? Why did I reach for what my heart denied? Life offers nothing — nothing that is true Your arms dear fold, your tender kiss beside. I want the fleck of moonlight on the sea — I want your lips — your eyes' impassioned light. Beloved, thru the rain, come back to me, I love you so — and want you so to-night! [76] ALTAR FIRES MY HEART IS LIKE A HARP My heart is like a golden harp attuned And waiting for your hand to sweep its strings To wake the wild, glad music of its love. Arion's lyric song, Apollo's lyre Could bring forth strains with less of magic fraught Than could your fingers, sweeping o'er the chord Of love's desires half sleeping, unfulfilled. My heart is like a harp, and in its keep There slumbers passion, sympathy and grief, With love's eternal constancy of joy. So when your fingers, love-tipped, touch its strings, The soul of music will give forth its song And kiss the lips of harmony — and you. l77] ALTAR FIRES GIVE ME THE WEST Give me the West with the lurid glow Of flagrant sun and the restful blow Of sweeping grass o'er the boundless fields Where good mother earth such rich harvest yields. Give me the West where the broncos dance To the cut of a spur in a bold advance, And the gUmmer of steel in a practiced hand Makes man bow to a law he can understand. Give me the West where the heart is light As the silver stars in an azure night ; And the soul is as free as the birds that fly — What a place to live! What a place to die! [78] ALTAR FIRES THE CALL OF YOU The red of my lips and the shine of my eyes Are just for you. The depth of my soul where love's secret lies Is just for you. The beat of my heart and its passion's flame Are aroused by your lips as you speak my name, For no other call can be just the same As the call of you. [79] ALTAR FIRES GIVE ME THE GLASS Give me the glass till I fill it with laughter Deeply imprisoned in amber-hued wine; Fling off the cloak of gloom! Let the hereafter Look to itself, for the present is mine. Mine are the hours of this night's happy musing — Mine to be gay with the youth that is mine ; Each of our lives is of each of our choosing — Give me the glass till I fill it with wine ! [80] ALTAR FIRES FORGET YOU, DEAR? Forget you, dear? Well, yes, when sky and sea Forget to meet and kiss before the day; When life is woe and death is happiness. When every vital part of me is still And lies there, unresponsive, *neath your kiss. Then, should you go from out my heart's recess, I should forget to grieve with you away, As if the world had given a boon to me In leaving me alone. And only this Can soothe the pain — when there's your place to fill. [8i] ALTAR FIRES HER REWARD All day she went about her drugging work; No smile was on her lips tho' baby hands Were fretting at her skirts and asking alms Of pats and kisses which she could not shirk. She did not sing — the clatter of the pans Too jarring was to blend with music's charms. So toiled she in the heat. And all day long Within her heart, grown numb with too much pain, She loved the man who married for a home. Romance forgotten was — 'Twas she alone Who sought its thrill to woo back youth again; The man ne'er made a move to right the wrong. At night he came to taste the luscious meal Her worn hands had prepared, and round him shied The sweet, clean children, lending home their peace. But ate he hungrily, with scarce a word: And opposite, his wife's low voice he heard But dimly, for his thoughts had sought release In pipe and paper. And the woman sighed. She watched him later on their flower-decked porch Absorbed in thought — and so she stole away To put the babes to bed. Then by the light She took the mending and with tired eyes [82] ALTAR FIRES Spied out the holes, as one who vainly tried To fill a gap that e'er yawned empty quite. One word would be enough — one little word Of praise for tasty food or dainty cloth; Some hold to cling to underneath the froth That life has offered her these weary years. Such dull routine found no relief in tears — Joy seemed now at an end — not just deferred. And all she asked of life was one short hour At twilight's glow to sit beside the man Her heart had chosen in youth's first sweet call : To hear his voice give gratefully its dower Of worthy praise for work that left her wan. To hear him say 'T love you!" — that was all. [83] ALTAR FIRES DOUBTS So much I've bourne. God willed that I should meet The thorns of life before I plucked the rose. Rough was the way where trod my baby feet, Stern the demands my youth's first strength to greet. Oh, since I've struggled for the night's repose, Let it come now — before I face defeat ! So much I've hoped. When darkest shadows lay Over my path and shut away my sun, I've tried to smile, e'en thru my tears, and pray Grieving, their balm would drive the hurt away; Trusting that battles lost, instead of won, Would, at the last, a blessing for me say. And I have wept. Is there, in that white pain Aught of a joy surrendered, unfulfilled? Is there a peace beyond this world to gain After the heart has ceased its fitful strain? What is the price, when passion's fires are stilled That we can hope for, that our 30uls can claim? So much I've prayed. So hard has been the blight Of every wish that crashed to earth. Alone, Groping my way, I've tried to see the light In that dim future which we claim as right — We who have fought and lost — instead of won. [84] ALTAR FIRES THE PRICE I never dreamed I could be so alone And feel your presence near. War's toss of dice Has taken toll of each and every one — And you, dear one, have paid your bitter price. It would be better far had you gone blind Than left to wander, groping out your way With seeing eyes, yet lost to home and kind; Your mind deaf to my call — to what I say. I cannot bear to have you look at me With those dear eyes that cannot sense my smile; To have you here within my arms, to be Yet muttering of other things the while. If you've forgotten home and me, and years Bring nothing back, — may God then set you free. Better by far on your dead face my tears, Than have you live and not remember me ! .8S1 ALTAR FIRES THE TEST OF SACRIFICE You stand beside me now, my love — my love ! So silent, tho' it is our parting-time, When proof of every vow should beg for speech. Fm waiting here within your arms' slow reach. Why do you pause before that kiss sublime? That last, long kiss that shall our union prove. What I have given to you I can't regret. For love like mine no sacrifice is great Before the storm- tossed sea of your desire. Yet something holy stays mid passion's fire, To chasten and subdue me as I wait To hear you say you never can forget. You stand so silent now. Our souls are bare Before each other's eyes — and you must go And leave me here to pay a woman's price, The debt life claims for loving sacrifice; The shackles of a bondage man can't know. And woman meets it smiling — tho' unfair. Why stand you so? Is there no word to say Of all the things we dreamed of, you and I? No vow to make? No promises to prove Your whispered words to me thro' nights of love? And is this parting-time a real good-bye? God bless you, then — and speed you on your way! [86] ALTAR FIRES SURRENDER 'Twas when I saw you first. Across the grass Your cool gray eyes took up the fire of mine. It came to pass As miracles oft come on drab day's heels, Glowing, sublime. The haughty world within my singing heart A crumbled mass became before your voice; Ambitions, dreams, — the whole creative art Of gray-dim years Died down before that love. A moment's choice From out the joys of life — from out its tears. [87] ALTAR FIRES UNEASY HOURS Oh, heart of mine — Oh, woman's heart of mine, Why do you crave to leave upon men's Hves The flash of you? Be but content to shine Unselfishly. The power you have that strives To rouse swift passion's flame must die with youth. Far better touch with tenderness men's lives — Love's lasting truth. Your restless moods — so fitfully they sleep A touch, a glance, a word will set them free. And for the sunset years no store you keep. From out this youth's wild madness save for me A saner vision when my eyes shall know No lure. I want ahead to see Where safe to go. [88] ALTAR FIRES FAREWELL Over our love and our joy and our pain; Farewell. You've loved me and kissed me — but never again. Farewell. The days of our madness and nights of our bliss — How little we thought they would bring us to this! But I've looked into Heaven with every kiss — And Hell. Back to the grind and the fret and demand; Farewell. So we bob up and down as Fate holds out her hand. Farewell. But we've danced on the way to the scaffold of MUST And we've bathed in sincerity, passion and trust, As we picked love's best flowers ere all wearied by dust They fell. And, perhaps, after all such a parting is kind; Who can tell ? But with sobs I am mute — and with tears I am blind At farewell! [89] ALTAR FIRES THEIR FAITH IN ME They had such faith in me, my dear ones did : IVe stood and watched them going, one by one, Into the Land that seems so far away. I've Hngered by them, helpless, while they slid Gently away — forever to be gone — And all my yearning could not make them stay. Their faith in me was such a blessed thing! To think I should fall short in that last hour And stand by, tortured, while they looked to me To use the knowledge born of love to bring Their ebbing life-tide back to all its power. Oh, why was not God's wisdom given to me To meet that trust within those dying eyes And ease them sweetly down in their last sleep ? I, too, with them have known Gethsemane — To hold a loved one close, while death defies The warmth my arms would in that dear form keep ! So, after all, when that last hour shall come, And dear ones stand at parting of the ways — A greater Presence has the master hand. For with the kiss of death all pain is gone. And for the grieving of the one who stays The balm of time will make him understand. [90] ALTAR FIRES TO You have gone — and I've tasted the wormwood that Ues In each cup of our pleasure thru Hfe; You have gone— and the sunshine has died from the skies Like our courage in battle with strife. Oh, it's not quite the poor, lonely heart that you leave Where the pain is the hardest to bear; If you'd not gone away with a smile while I grieve: It's the thinking how little you care ! You have gone and the tears creep up hot in my eyes ; Eyes longing to look on your face. You have gone — and the future so desolate lies. Where you have no thought and no place. I have crushed back my sobs while I waved you farewell ; I have tried to be brave and be fair. But I love you ! I love you ! My lips long to tell. You would smile — it's how little you care! [91] ALTAR FIRES YOU GAVE ME VIOLETS You gave me violets and now, whene'er their perfume steals Soft o'er my sense with sweet recall of long- forgotten rest, I think of one moon-silvered eve, a night for love in quest. When you and I stood hand in hand and pledged love's sacred seals. You gave me violets, and in that moon-enchanted hour. They nestled close against my heart and breathed their scented life Upon us like an incense — ah, we knew not then of strife — But looked upon the future's scroll and trusted to its dower. We stood content upon the sands, where lapped the small, bright waves, And deep within your dear, gray eyes I saw the love- light glow ; I wondered why such perfect joy was given me to know When in so many other lives lay green and hungry graves. I held the blossoms to my face and you, in swift delight, Pressed your warm cheek against my own and in your man's quick way [92] ALTAR FIRES You drew my soul to meet your lips where love's con- fession lay, And sanctified that lover's kiss you gave and took that night. So while the silver water breathed its passion to the moon, We pledged our troth — a sacred vow that we would e'er be true; You kissed the drooping little flower that I had given to you And said our perfect, rosy love would never lose its bloom. And now, to-night, I think how keen was all that first delight ; The shadows that around me creep are grim with memories dense, A contrast to that sunny past with all its love intense, As lightning differs from the snow — or wrong is far from right. There is a mist of tears to-night between the moon and me ; The future's dower has been but pain that seared an empty life ; And I, who once had smiled in faith above a world of strife, Now look with dim and longing eyes across a lonely sea. [93] ALTAR FIRES I feel as if the laughing world had closed its fickle doors And shut within its callous heart all sunshine and all love. While I, alone, stand cold without beneath the stars above That must see you, a wanderer, on distant, foreign shores. Alone I stand upon the shore and in my trembling hands I clasp a bunch of violets, all sweet with fragrant dew; Their scented breath recalls the past and makes me think of you — And how we stood and pledged our vows one eve on these same sands. Oh, you were full of youth and fire, perhaps you did not know The lure that lay beyond our love, beyond our lips' first kiss. And maybe now you've learned it well and know the truth of this — That men must fight to hold their own wherever they may go. And women must e'er pay the price in heart-ache and in tears! Oh, lovely flowers, the scent of you sweeps all the years away [94] ALTAR FIRES And makes me feel again your arms and hear your deep voice say : "I love you, dear. I love you, dear." Ah, how the memory sears! I hold the violets to my breast and crush them to my face — The purple blooms, so dewy soft, so full of long ago. I wonder if in some far land you'd greet our pledge- flower so — And would it on your heart, as mine, its stirring memory trace. But then that other grief steals in and kills the prompt- ings sweet; That other lesson you have taught and written out in pain. And in this hour that I had hoped to see joy smile again I stand and battle with the life you made me think complete ! You gave me violets, and now of all the flowers I know, I shun their fragrance and their bloom so freighted with the past. Why was it that I did not know such joy could never last? Why was it, in the first, sweet youth, I learned to love you so? [95] ALTAR FIRES MY MOTHER Kind she always was. She understood All my young life held of dark and light; Took she nothing — gave she only good, That my youth might blossom without blight. Tender was she always. Oft I knew As the years rolled by, the sterner way : Life's intenser shadows round me drew Doubts all new that threatened Hope's bright ray Held out by her hand. She felt my pain Just as keen as I — thru love of me. Loss to her meant joy if 't were my gain; Sacrificed she all — and cheerfully. In maturer years, when deeper ties Welded us together by their woe — Grief grown homely, sharper tragedies. Reaped unkindly where I did not sow — Then that mother-instinct, always true, Felt with me the keenness of my pain: Idols fallen, ne'er to build anew, Castles shattered, reared too soon in Spain. Felt with me, yet pointed out the way Toward the sunshine and life's saner view. Knowing when to kiss and what to say That each thought might broaden as it grew. 196] ALTAR FIRES When the faith within my heart lay still, Stunned by Life's hard lesson driven home, And the struggle up the doubt-strewn hill Seemed too endless to attempt alone. Then I turned to her whose mother-heart Felt the turnstile of my woman's soul Keener, perhaps, than L And with the art Of her blessed wisdom, knew the goal Where to point my feet. And in that hour When Love came forth to claim me as the price. Bravely did she smile and give as dower Both her blessing and her sacrifice. [97] I LIBRARY OF CONGRESS 015 905 354 4