Price, 25 Cents 
 
 Christmas Spealdn' 
 Skaggs's Skule 
 
 MARIE IRISH 
 
 PAINE PUBLISHING COMPANY 
 
 DAYTON, OHIO 
 
MUSICAL ENTERTAINMENTS 
 
 These emigs can be nsed In all manner of entertainments. The 
 mQisic is e^sy and both mnsic and words are especially catchy. CUDdren 
 like them. Everybody likes tbem* Sheet mnEAc. Price, SS cent» each. 
 
 HERE'S TO THE LAND OF THE STARS AND THE STRIFES. 
 
 (Bugbee-Worrell.) A patriotic song w.hich every child should know and' 
 love. The sentiment is elevating. The music is martial and inspiring. 
 May be effectively sung by the entire school. Suitable for any occasion 
 and may be sung by children or grown-ups. Be the first to use this 
 song in your community. 
 
 I'Lt NEVER PLAY WITH TOU AGAIN. (Guptill -Weaver.) A 
 quarrel between a small boy and girl. The words are defiant and pert. , 
 The boy and his dog have been in mischief, and the small maiden pout- 
 ingly declares that she will never play with him again, but changes her 
 mind in the last verse. A taking little duet for any occasion, with full 
 directions for motions. 
 
 JOLLY FARMER LADS AND LASSIES. (Irlsh-Lyman.) A de- 
 cidedly humorous a/ctlon song prepared especially for district schools. 
 It will make a hit wherever produced. 
 
 JOLLY PICKANINNIES. (Worrell.) Introduce this coon song 
 into your next entertainment. If you use the directions for the mo- 
 tions which accompany the music, the pickaninnies will bring down the 
 house. Their black faces and shining eyea will guarantee a "hit," The 
 words are great and the music just right, 
 
 LULLABY LANE. (Worrell.) This song is one which the chil- 
 dren, once having learned, will never forget. The words have the charm 
 of the verses written by Robert Louis Stevenson. The music is equally 
 sweet and is perfectly suited to the beautiful words. It may be sung 
 as a solo by a little girl with a chorus of other little girls with dolls, or 
 as a closing song by the whole school. 
 
 MY OWN AMERICA, I LOVE BUT THEE. (Worrell.) Here 
 is a song that will, arouse patriotism in the heart of every one who 
 hears it. The music is so catchy that the children and grown-ups, too, 
 just can't resist it. It makes a capital marching song. 
 
 NOW, AREN'T YOU GLAD YOU CAME? (Guptill -Weaver.) 
 This is a closing song which is quite out of the ordinary. There is 
 humor in every line. The music is lively. Your audience will not 
 soon forget this spicy song for it will get many an unexpected laugh. 
 The motions which accompany this song make it doubly effective. For 
 any occasion and for any number of children. 
 
 WE ARE CREEPY LITTLE SCARECROWS. (Guptill-Weaver.) 
 A weird, fascinating action song. You can't go wrong with this song. 
 There are four verses and chorus. Complete directions accompany this 
 song so that it may be featured as a song and drill, if desired. For any 
 occasion and for any number of children. 
 
 WE'VE JUST ARRIVED FROM BASHFUL TOWN. (Worrell.) 
 "^his song will bring memories to the listeners of their own bashful 
 school days. They will recall just how "scared" they were when asked 
 to sing or play or speak. The words are unusually clever. The music 
 is decidedly melodious. It naakes a capital welcome song or it may be 
 sung at any time on any program with assured success. 
 
 WE HOPE YOU'VE BROUGHT YOUR SMILES ALONG. (Wor- 
 rell.) A welcome song that will at once put the audience in a joyous 
 frame of mind and create a happy impression that will mean half the 
 success of your entire program. Words, bright and inspiring. Music, 
 catchy. A sure hit for your entertainment. 
 
 WE'LL NOW HAVE TO SAY GOOD-BYE. (Worrell.) This 
 beautiful song has snap and go that will appeal alike to visitors and 
 singers. It is just the song to send your audience home with happy 
 memories of the occasion. 
 
 Paine Publislutig Company Dasrton, Ohio 
 
• -? 
 
 Christmas Speakin 
 at Skaggs's Skule 
 
 By 
 
 MARIE IRISH 
 
 PAINE PUBLISHING COMPANY 
 
 DAYTON, OHIO 
 
\ 
 
 ^^^!<u'i^'^ 
 
 Visitors. 
 
 CHARACTERS 
 Miss Emmeline Elkins — Teacher. 
 JosiAii JuDD — Clerk of Skule Board 
 
 Mrs. Skaggs 
 Mrs. Hil-l 
 
 Billy Skaggs — Very Bashful. 
 
 Ole Swan son — A Swede. 
 
 Florildy 
 Matildy 
 
 Rastus — A Negro Boy. 
 
 Sam Shaw — Who Stutters. 
 
 Virgil Va^e — Very Studious. 
 
 Tiny Tilly — Small for Age. 
 
 CoRABELL — Her Fat Sister. 
 
 Sarah Jane — Who's Not Scared. 
 
 Time of Playing — Thirty Minutes 
 Scene, An Old-time District School room 
 
 ^^; 
 
 The Twins. 
 
 TMP9C-006495 
 
 Copyright, 
 
 1921, by Paine Publishing Company 
 
 2 
 
 
 DEC 16 1921 
 
 
 
 ©CI.D 5 9. '5 8 6 
 
 
 
 *wc 
 
 1 
 
COSTUMES 
 
 Miss Elkins, Old-maid costume, much fussed up with 
 bright colors; spectacles, hair in corkscrew curls each side 
 of face. 
 
 JosiAH JuDD, Chin whiskers, colored shirt, bright tie, suit 
 that is too large, boots, large red bandanna handkerchief. 
 
 Mrs. Skaggs and Mrs. Hill, Hair done up old style, old- 
 fashioned wool dresses, small old-time bonnets that tie under 
 chin, shawls. 
 
 Billy Skaggs, good-sized boy with clothes too small 
 waist with large ruffled collar, bright bow tie, short trousers, 
 bright stockings. 
 
 Ole Swanson, colored shirt, overalls, colored handker- 
 chief tied around neck. 
 
 Matildy and Elqrildy, Old-fashioned wool dresses, 
 much too long, hair flowing, ribbon tied around head with 
 bow at the top. 
 
 Rastus, Bright calico waist, trousers that do not fit, 
 patched with bright color, face blackened. 
 
 Virgil Vane, hair parted in middle, spectacles, coat much 
 too small, long trousers, stand-up collar. 
 
 Sam Shaw, Short trousers, a coat much too large and 
 long. 
 
 Tilly, A small slender giri with rather long, tight-fittino 
 dress, hair hanging in two braids. 
 
CoRABELL, Good-sized girl, well padded to be fat, very 
 short skirt, hair with big bow at each side of face. 
 
 Sarah Jane, Rather small size, dressed much too old 
 for age, hair crimped, old-style gown. 
 
 Stage arrangement — Pupils sit on benches along back 
 of stage ; small table for teacher at one side with books, bell 
 and long ruler. Stand with water pail and dipper, dinner 
 pails hanging on wall, also children's wraps; some decora- 
 tions of evergreen and Merry Christmas pinned on wall in 
 leters of various sizes and colors. Visitors sit iil chairs at 
 sides of room. 
 
Christmas Speakin' at Skaggs's Skule 
 
 Teacher (tapping bell loudly) — Now, children dear, T 
 hope you will all be very, very good and very, very quiet 
 while we have our entertainment. What kind of an enter- 
 tainment is it to be, children? (a pause) W'y, children, 
 don't you know what kind of an entertainment it is going 
 to be? 
 
 Virgil — Wal, I think it'll be a fust-rate good 'un if none 
 of 'em don't fergit their pieces. 
 
 Sam — W-w-w-w-w-wal, I w-w-w-w-w-won't f-f-f-f-fer- 
 git mine if I d-d-d-d-don't git b-b-b-b-b-bashful. 
 
 Sarah Jane — Huh, you bet you I won't git skeered — I 
 haint fraid o' nothin'. I wouldn't be skeered to speak if 
 they was a grizzly bear here. 
 
 Tilly — Oh, teacher, she would, too, wouldn't she, 
 teacher ? 
 
 Sarah Jane — I wouldn't neither, so there! 
 
 Teacher (tapping bell)— Children, be still. That is not 
 a nice way to act on entertainment day. I meant what 
 kind of an entertainment are we going to have accord- 
 ing to the season (a pause). W'y, can't you tell, children? 
 
 CoRABELL — Teacher, what's season? 
 
 5 
 
CHRISTMAS SFEAKIN' AT SKAGGS'S SKULE. 
 
 Matildy — Huh, don't you know that? W'y, it's salt an 
 pepper an' spice an' stuff they put in things to season 'em. 
 
 Virgil — Aw, that haint what it means — it's spring an' 
 fall an' winter — that's what season means, haint it, teacher? 
 
 Teacher {tapping hell) — Children, be still. I mean what 
 kind of pieces are we going to have in our entertainment? 
 
 All (loudly) — Chris'mus pieces. 
 
 Teacher — Yes, children, that is right — Christmas pieces, 
 children. Why are we going to have Christmas pieces, 
 children? (pause). 
 
 Rastus — I reckon so's we-all'll git a Chris'mus present 
 ef we does our pieces good. Mammy says as how she's 
 gwine gimme a mighty nice present ef I does my part good. 
 
 Sam — I t-t-t-t-think we're s-s-s-s-s-sayin' K-k-k-k-k-k-k- 
 kris'mus pieces k-k-k-k-k-kawase K-k-k-k-k-k-kris'mus is the 
 time to s-s-s-s-s-say K-k-k-k-k-k-k-kris'mus pieces. 
 
 Teacher — Yes, children, we're going to have a nice 
 Christmas entertainment because Christmas day is coming 
 and we all love Christmas day, don't we, children? 
 
 All — Yes, ma'am. 
 
 Teacher — And so, children, I hope we shall have a nice 
 entertainment, an' that you will be very, very good an' 
 speak up nice an' loud an' do your parts the very, very best 
 you can (children, nudge each other and point off stage as if 
 looking out of window). 
 
 1 
 
CHRISTMAS SPEAKIN' AT SKAGGS'S SKULE. 
 
 Florildy (zuaving hand) — Teacher, somebody's comin' 
 (knock is heard). 
 
 Teacher — S-s-sh ! Be quiet, children (goes over and 
 admits Mrs. Hill). 
 
 Enter Mrs. Hill 
 
 Mrs. Hill — Good afternoon, teacher. 'I heard as how 
 you're goin' to have Chris'mus speakin' here this afternoon 
 an' I says to Jeremiah, 1 says, I'm jes' goin' over to the 
 skule house an' hear that speakin' 'cause as I says to 'im, 
 says I, I do jes' love to hear the childrun speak their 
 pieces. An' so here I be, teacher, an' I hope I haint late. 
 
 Teacher — No, indeed, you're not late. Mis' Hill, an' 
 we're very, very glad you came. Have this chair {she scats 
 Mrs. Hill). 
 
 Mrs. Hill — My, my, well I remember the time, teacher, 
 that I've spoke a piece at Chris'mus time. They did say, 
 as I says to Jeremiah, says I, they used to say that I was 
 an awful good hand at speakin'. Mebbe I'll speak a piece 
 here today (smiles at children). 
 
 Teacher — That will be very, very nice. You'd like to 
 have Mis' Hill speak, wouldn't you, children? 
 
 All — Yes, ma'am (they nudge and point off stage again). 
 
 Sarah Jane — Oh, teacher, Billy Skaggs's mother, she's 
 comin'. (a knock is heard. Teacher goes over and admits 
 Mrs. Skaggs). 
 
 Enter Mrs. Skaggs 
 
 7 
 
CHRISTMAS SPEAKIN' AT SKAGGS'S SKULE. 
 
 Mrs. Skaggs — How-de-do, teacher. I hope you're feehn' 
 real well. I've come over to the Chris'mus speakin', teacher. 
 I've got an awful lot o' work to do to home, bein' as we're 
 goin' to have comp'ny on Chris'mus, an' I'm tryin' to make 
 some Chris'mus presents, an' bake an' clean up an' all, but 
 Billy he was so set on my comin' that I jes' come an' here 
 I be (she shakes hands with the teacher and Mrs. Hill). 
 
 Teacher — We are very, very glad you came. I should 
 have been very, very dissappointed if no one came to visit 
 (she seats Mrs. Skaggs by Mrs. Hill). 
 
 Mrs. Skaggs — I hope you haint had none the speakin' 
 yet. I'd hate dreadful bad to miss any of it. As I was 
 sayin' to Hen — that's my husban' — I says, Hen, there aint a 
 single thing I like to hear better'n children speakin' pieces. 
 I think it's dreadful nice, even when they make mistakes. 
 As I says to Hen, we can't expect 'em to do too^good. 
 
 Ole (pointing off stage) — Oh, teacher, yust look who's 
 ban comin' ! 
 
 Teacher (tapping bell) — Be quiet, children (knock is 
 heard. She goes over and admits Josiah Judd) . 
 Enter Josiah Judd 
 
 Mr. Judd — How-de-do, teacher, how-de-do? I came over 
 to be present at — that is, to attend, and injoy — that is, to 
 participate in the Chris'mus entertainment (shakes hands 
 azvkwardly zvith teacher amd the tzuo znsitors). As a mem- 
 ber of the skule board I feel that I should incourage the 
 childern of the deestrict with my presence here an' see how 
 
 8 
 
 II 
 
CHRISTMAS SPEAKIN' AT SKAGGS'S SKULE. 
 
 they're gittin' on. Be they doin' purty good, teacher? (looks 
 children over). 
 
 Teacher — We're very, very glad you came, Mr. Judd. 
 Yes, they're doin' real well (she seats him). Now, children 
 dear, we will begin to commence our Christmas entertain- 
 ment (Billy sobs softly). 
 
 Sarah Jane (zvuving hand) — Teacher, teacher, Billy's 
 bawlin'. 
 
 Teacher — W'y, Billy, what is the matter? (goes to him). 
 
 Billy (sobbing) — I — I — I — 
 
 Mrs. Skaggs — Lan' sakes, teacher, what's the matter with 
 'im? Billy, is your stummick botherin' you? 
 
 Billy — I — I want to set longside o' maw. 
 
 Mrs. Skaggs — Now, Billy, you set right where you be 
 an' stop your fussin'. 
 
 Billy (boo-hooing out loud) — I — want — ^to set — ^by — 
 maw. 
 
 Mrs. Skaggs — Wal, lan' sakes, teacher, I spose he'll cry 
 himself sick ef he can't set by me. Can he come set here? 
 He's an awful hand fer his maw, Billy is (the children 
 
 Teacher (faking Billy by hand and leading him) — ^Yc-, 
 he may sit up here (she fixes a chair beside his mother for 
 Billy). Now, children dear, we will sing our nice welcome 
 song (she beats time with long ruler, Mr. Judd beats time 
 with his hand and keeps time with his head; the two visitors 
 
 
 
CHRISTMAS SPEAKIN' AT SKAGGS'S SKULE. 
 
 heat time zmth foot. The children sing with a great deal of 
 spirit). 
 
 Tune: Just Before the Battle, Mother 
 
 Welcome, welcome, Merry Christmas, 
 Joyfully we welcome you ; 
 Welcome, welcome. Merry Christmas, 
 With a welcome glad and true; 
 Welcome, welcome. Merry Christmas, 
 Welcome to your Christmas toys ; 
 Welcome, welcome. Merry Christmas, 
 With your welcome Christmas joys. 
 Welcome, welcome. Merry Christmas, 
 With a welcome loud and clear 
 Welcome, welcome, Merry Christmas, 
 Welcome, best day of the year. 
 
 Mrs. Hill— That was real fine. 
 
 Mrs. Skaggs — They done jes' splendid, teacher. 
 
 Mr. Judd — Very good, very good! 
 
 Teacher — Now we will have an essay on Christmas by 
 Virgil Vale. Virgil wrote this all by himself out of his own 
 head an' it is very, very good {Virgil walks to the front 
 with long strides, smoothes his hair, fixes his collar, straight- 
 ens his coat, hlozvs his nose, then takes a paper from his 
 pocket and reads; high tone and sing-song) . 
 
 Virgil — Christmas is a very nice day. Tt comes on the 
 25th day of December. Christmas is v/hen Santa Claus 
 
 10 
 
CHRISTMAS SPEAKIN' AT SKAGGS'S SKULE. 
 
 comes with presents. Christmas is when we hang up our 
 stockings to get presents. Christmas is when we have 
 Christmas trees with presents on. Christmas is when folks 
 has company or goes visit^in'. On Christmas day folks say 
 Merry Christmas to each other. Christmas day don't last 
 long but it is a long time gettin' here. It is more blessed 
 to give Christmas than to receive it. Christmas is a merry 
 day {bows low and takes seat). 
 
 Teacher — That was fine, Virgil. 
 
 Mr. Judd (nodding head) — Very good, very good! 
 
 Mrs. Hill — I couldn't a wrote a better one myself. 
 
 Teacher — Now we will have a piece by Ole Swanson. 
 
 O'LE (much scared) — Teacher, I aint ban feel very gude — 
 I don't gass I ban speakin' my piece today. I — I skall got 
 awfully yumpin' tooths aching, teacher. 
 
 Teacher — Oh, now, Ole, you can speak. Your tooth 
 doesn't ache. 
 
 Ole — Teacher, please, I ban gotting such a headache 1 
 aint skall ban feelings gude, teacher. I no skall ban able 
 to speakings, teacher. 
 
 Teacher — Then T shall tell your mother not to give you 
 any Christmas present. 
 
 Ole — Then by yimminy, I skall ban speakings, yust the 
 same like I aint ban sick (marches rapidly to front and 
 speaks) : 
 
 11 
 
CHRISTMAS SPEAKIN' AT SKAGGS'S SKULE. 
 
 One time there ban one little boy, 
 
 Who sometimes yust ban bad an' rude ; 
 
 He makes a face to his mamma (makes face) 
 
 An' aint behaves not very gude. 
 
 He don't ban studies very hard 
 To learn his lessons gude to skule; 
 An' sometimes whispers with the girls, 
 Which skall ban 'gainst the teacher's rule. 
 
 This little boy he ban so bad 
 That when gude Mister Santy come, 
 All he skall puts into his stocking 
 Ban yust one piece of shewing gum. 
 
 (Makes quick how and hurries to seat.) 
 
 Rastus — Done served dat-dare boy jes' right, aint it, 
 teacher ? 
 
 Teacher — Yes, indeed. You spoke very well, Ole. Next 
 we shall have a song by the twins, Matildy and Florildy. 
 
 Matildy — Oh, I don't want to sing— I'm scart. 
 
 Florildy — You come on, now. You know what maw 
 told you — that she'd spank you if you didn't .sing nice after 
 teacher had learned us so good. 
 
 Mrs. Hill — Come on, Maltildy. I know that song's 
 goin' to be jes' splendid (the tzvins go to the front and are 
 about to sing when Matildy begins to giggle. Florildy looks 
 ct her then she too giggles). 
 
 12 
 
CHRISTMAS SPEAKIN' AT SKAGGS'S SKULE. 
 
 Teacher — Girls, that is very, very wrong. Sing your 
 song like nice girls. (Matildy straightens out, then as they 
 are about to sing she has another spell of giggling in zvhich 
 Florildy finally joins. They at last sing) : 
 
 Matildy and Florildy. 
 
 Tune: Blue Bells of Scotland 
 
 Oh we are the twins, (Matildy alone) and Matildy is my 
 name, 
 
 (Florildy alone) And mine is Florildy, which is almost the 
 same ; 
 
 (Both) Matildy and Florildy, the merry twins are we, 
 And it's just before Christmas 
 We're good as good can be. 
 
 (Florildy looks very solemn and good, Matildy giggles.) 
 
 2. 
 (Matildy alone) When Santa Claus cometh T want a pretty 
 ring, 
 
 (Florildy alone) And since we are twins T am wanting the 
 same thing; 
 
 (Matildy alone) I want a Christmas doll with fair hair and 
 eyes of blue, 
 
 (Both) And because we are twins, 'course Florildy want? 
 one too. 
 
CHRISTMAS SPEAKIN' AT SKAGGS'S SKULE. 
 
 3. 
 
 Oh, we are the twins (Florildy pointing to Matildy) And 
 Matildy is her name; 
 
 {Maltildy, pointing to Florildy) And hers is Florildy which 
 is almost the same. 
 
 {Both) Matildy and Florildy, the merr}^ twins are we, 
 
 And it's just before Christmas 
 
 We're good as good can be {pass to seats). 
 
 Mrs. Skaggs — Now, I think they done that real fine. 
 
 Mr. Judd — Very good, very good ! 
 
 Teacher — The next will be a piece by Rastus. 
 
 Rastus — Say, teacher, I don't wan' ter speak no piece, 
 I shooly don' wan' ter, teacher. 
 
 Teacher — Oh, yes, you do, Rastus. 
 
 Rastus — No, hones', re'lly, I shooly cross mah heart an' 
 hope ter die, I don' wan' ter speak mah piece, teacher. 
 
 Teacher — Why not? 
 
 Rastus — I's 'fraid Til disrecomember it, teacher an' 
 mammy said as how if I disrecomembered mah piece Fd 
 git skun alive when I gits home. I don' wan' ter get skun, 
 shuah's youse born I don' wan' ter, teacher. 
 
 Teacher — Now, Rastus, you won't forget. I know you 
 won't, so come speak like a nice boy. 
 
 Rastus {rubbing eyes) — ^I — I — don' wan' ter — be — 
 
 SKUN! 
 
 14 
 
CHRISTMAS SPEAKIN' AT SKAGGS'S SKULE. 
 
 Mrs. Hill — Poor little fellow {wipes her eyes). 
 
 Sarah Jane — Teacher, if she- skuns 'im will he die? 
 
 Rastus {loudly) — Boo-hoo, I don' wan' ter DIE! 
 
 Mr. Judd — Now, Rastus, you speak your piece and I'll 
 see that your mother doesn't touch you and I'll give you 
 some candy. 
 
 Rastus — All right {comes forward grinning widely, bows 
 and speaks: 
 
 Some boys dey wants a drum er gun, 
 An' some dey t'inks a sled is fun ; 
 But fer mah Chris'mus I's a tellin' 
 I wants a great, big watermelon. 
 
 {Measures large size with arms.) 
 
 A tickin' watch would suit some boys, 
 An' some dey's fond ob books an' toys ; 
 But, OH, 'twould set mah heart a swellin' 
 On Chris'mus ter git a watermelon. 
 
 {Measures large size as before.) 
 
 Candy an' nuts dey jes' suits some, 
 
 But as fer me — oh, yum — yum — YUM ! (smacks lips) 
 
 Fer joy I'd shooly feel like yellin' 
 
 Ef Santy'd brang me a watermelon. 
 
 {Measures as before, bows lozu and takes seat.) 
 
 TiLLiE — Teacher, he won't git skun, will he 
 
 15 
 
CHRISTMAS SPEAKIN' AT SKAGGS'S SKULE. 
 
 Mr. Judd — No, indeed he won't. That was very good, 
 very good, {he gives Rastus bright stick of candy). 
 
 R.ASTUS (eating candy) — Teacher, I jes' as liefs to speak 
 mah piece ovah agin. 
 
 Teacher — No, once is enough. 
 
 Billy — Boo-hoo, boo-hoo, boo-hoo! 
 
 Mrs. Skaggs — ^Lan' sakes, Billy, what's the matter now? 
 
 Billy — Boo-hoo, boo-hoo, boo-hoo ! 
 
 Mrs. Skaggs — Now, Billy, tell maw what's the matter 
 Be your stummick a hurtin' you agin, Billy? 
 
 Billy — I want some candy like he's got (points to 
 Rastus). 
 
 Mrs. Skaggs — Wal, jes' as soon's we git home you can 
 have some. 
 
 Billy (kicking floor luith both feet) — Don't wan' ter 
 wait. Boo-hoo- boo-hoo ! 
 
 Sam — I s-s-s-s-s-s-say, he b-b-b-b-b-b-better have a 
 g-g-g-g'-g'oo<^ 1-1-1-1-l-l-lickin'. (Mr. Judd slips over quietly 
 and puts a stick of candy into Billy's hand). 
 
 Billy — I won't — (sees candy and stares at it, laughs and 
 puts it in his mouth). Oh, Maw, I got some, too (laughs). 
 
 Teacher — Now we will have — 
 Corabell (softly) — Boo-hoo, boo-hoo, boo-hoo! 
 
 16 
 
CHRISTMAS SPEAKIN' AT SKAGGS'S SKULE. 
 
 Tilly — Oh, teacher, my little sister's cryin' ! (puts arm 
 around Corabcll). What's the matter, little sister? Are 
 you sick ? 
 
 CoRABELL — No! (louder) . Boo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo ! 
 
 Teacher {goes over) — Do you want to go home? 
 
 CoRABELL — NO! (louder) Boo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! 
 
 Tilly — Please, dearie, tell sister what's the matter. 
 
 CoRABELL — I want — some — too — boo-hoo-hoo ! 
 
 Mr. Judd — Pshaw, now ! I guess I got myself in trouble 
 (he slips over and puts candy in Corahell's hand). 
 
 Tilly — Oh, see, little sister, what the nice man gave you 
 (Corabcll laughs and puts candy in mouth). 
 
 Teacher — We will now have a piece by Sarah Jane (she 
 sits fussing in her seat). Come, Sarah Jane, speak your 
 piece. 
 
 Sam — Huh, she's f-f-f-f-f-f-fraid to s-s-s-s-s-say it. 
 
 Sarah Jane — 'I haint neither — I haint scart o' nuthin'. 
 Fm — Pm a fixin' up my stockin' (fusses, then goes to front 
 and stands there, twisting her dress and looking domn at 
 floor). 
 
 Teacher — Speak up, nice, Sarah Jane. 
 
 Virgil — Say, I bet she's so skeert she can't say nothin'. 
 
 Sarah Jane — I haint neither. 
 
 Virgil — Oh, you be, too. 
 
 17 
 
CHRISTMAS SPEAKIN' AT SKAGGS'S SKULE. 
 
 Sarah Jane — I haint scart o' nothin'. 
 
 Teacher — Why don't you speak, Sarah Jane? 
 
 Sarah Jane — I'm thinkin'. 
 
 Teacher — What are you thinking about? 
 
 Sarah Jane — How my piece starts (twists dress, looks 
 dozun at floor, moves lips. Tlien speaks, loud and fast). 
 
 The air was cold as cold could be, 
 The wind was blowing dis-ma-lee, 
 The night was dark as a black cat 
 And Santy Claus' heart went pit-y-pat. 
 
 (Stops, moves lips, etc., as before. Then speaks the four 
 lines over again and adds) : 
 
 'Cause 'twas so dark he feared he'd make, 
 Scootin' down chimbleys a bad mistake, 
 An' leave a doll with curly hair 
 For the big boy a livin' there. 
 
 (Bozvs low and takes seat.) 
 
 Mrs. Hill — That was real fine, Sarah Jane. 
 
 Mr. Judd — Very good, very good! 
 
 Teacher — Next Sam Shaw will speak. 
 
 Sam — T-t-t-t-t-teacher, I g-g-g-g-g-g-got a s-s-s-s-s-short 
 piece, k-k-k-k-k-kawse it takes me so 1-1-1-1-l-long to s-s-s-s 
 s-say it, k-k-k-k-k-kawse I st-st-st-st-st-stutter. 
 
 Teacher — Very well (Sam ptdls coat and contorts body 
 trying to speak) : 
 
 18 
 
CHRISTMAS SPEAKIN' AT SKAGGS'S SKULE. 
 
 A 1-1-1-1-l-little b-b-b-b-b-bird sat on a t-t-t-t-tree, 
 S_s_s-s-s-singin' loud an' k-k-k-k-klear, 
 Oh, 1-1-1-1-l-let us all b-b-b-b-b-be h-h-h-h-h-happy, 
 K-k-k-k-k-kawse K-k-k-k-k-k-kris'mus time is here. 
 
 (Bozus and takes seat.) 
 
 Mrs. Skaggs — I think he done that real fine. 
 
 Mr. Judd — Very good, very good ! 
 
 Teacher— Now, Billy will speak his piece (Billy shakes 
 head). 
 
 Mrs. Skaggs— Now Billy, you go speak like a good boy. 
 
 Billy— I— don't wan'— to {hangs to his mother's skirt). 
 
 Mrs. Skaggs— Now, don't you be naughty. You go 
 speak your piece so Santy Claus will bring you a nice present. 
 
 Billy— No, no, NO ! 
 
 Mrs. Skaggs— Come now, maw will take you over {she 
 takes him by the hand, pulls him to the front to speak, fixes 
 his tie, smoothes his hair and goes back to her seat). Now 
 speak, Billy. 
 
 Billy— No, no, NO! (he rims back and sits by his 
 mother). 
 
 Mrs; Skaggs— Now, Billy, don't act so— what would 
 paw say? {she pulls him back to front, fixes him again and 
 turns to go to her seat. Billy grabs her skirt and follozvs her, 
 crying). Wal, teacher, I don't guess he'll speak, he's so 
 bashful. He gits it from his paw an' I spose he can't help it. 
 Teacher— Then Tilly will speak her piece. 
 
 19 
 
CHRISTMAS SPEAKIN' AT SKAGGS'S SKULE. 
 
 Tilly {in high, piping voice, very dramatic gestures). 
 Upon the mountains high, (up to right with right hand) 
 Or in the valleys low, (down at left with left hand) 
 Or in the arching heavens, [up with both hands) 
 Where stars in silence glow [same as above). 
 In the North and South land (point to the front, then back) 
 East and West the breezes say, (to right, then left) 
 "Let ev'ry one be merry (to the front zvith both hands) 
 On Christmas Day" (same as above). 
 
 (Very sweeping bow, then takes seat.) 
 
 Mrs. Hill — My, my, her motions was jes' grand ! 
 
 Mr. Judd (nodding) — Very good, very good! 
 
 Tilly — Teacher, my litle sister has a piece to say. 
 
 Teacher — Then she may speak now. 
 
 Tilly — Come on, Corabell, don't be 'fraid. I'll take you 
 up to speak {she leads Corabell to the front and fixes her 
 hair, ribbons, dress, etc). Now speak your piece, little 
 sister (Corabell should be fat and larger than Tilly). 
 
 Corabell (lisping) — 
 
 I am a very little girl, 
 An' has'nt much to thay, 
 But I'll throw you a sweet kiss, 
 An' then I'll run away. 
 
 (Throzvs a kiss then stands grinning.) 
 Tilly — Come on, Corabell, run to your seat. 
 Corabell — I don't want to (stands grinning), 
 Tilly— Why not? 
 
 20 
 
CHRISTMAS SPEAKIN' AT SKAGGS'S SKULE. 
 
 CoRABELL. — ^I want you to come fetch me to my seat. 
 Tilly — All right (she goes and fakes Corahell to seat). 
 Mrs. Hill — My, my, aint she the cute little thing? 
 Mrs. Skaggs — Aint she though? Billy, can't you speak 
 like that little girl? 
 
 Billy — No, no (clings to his mother), 
 Virgil — Teacher, can't Mis'Hill speak her piece now? 
 The Others — Oh, yes, ma'am, yes, ma'am! 
 Mrs. Hill — My, my, me I It's so long sence I've spoke 
 I guess I've forgot how. Wal, I'll try, but don't you laugh at 
 me (goes to front, makes sweeping gesture zmth both hands 
 and hows lozv) . 
 
 Some folks there be, but they aint like me, 
 
 That whines an' almost has a lit, 
 An' pouts if Santy don't bring jes' what 
 They was wishin' fer to git. 
 
 (Pouts and stands looking very ugly.) 
 
 But some folks there be, an' they're like me, 
 
 That smiles an' says "Ho, ho, ho", 
 No matter what Santy brings 'em, 
 They're jolly an' laugh jes' like so. 
 (Hands on hips and laughs, ha-ha-ha, ho-ho-ho, then makes 
 another lozu boiv and takes seat.) 
 
 Teacher — That was splendid, wasn't it children ? ( Virgil 
 goes off). 
 
 Chilren (heartily) — Yes, ma'am. 
 Mr. Judd — Very good, very good! 
 
 21 
 
CHRISTMAS SPEAKIN' AT SKAGGS'S SKULE. 
 
 Teacher — Now, children, we are very, very glad to 
 have our esteemed an' highly respected clerk of the Skule 
 board here with us today. It was very, very nice for him 
 to take so much interest in you an' come to hear your pieces. 
 Now we shall be very, very glad to have him make us a 
 speech, won't we, children? 
 
 Children — Yes, ma'am. 
 
 Mr. Judd {going to front and rubbing hands together as 
 he talks) — Wal, teacher and children and visiters, I can say 
 with great truth an' much joy that I be glad to been here 
 today. Yes, childern, I alius like fer to hear the childern 
 speak pieces an' I can said that I been proud of the way 
 you speaked an' sung. Yes, childern, I can say with 
 truth an' not a tellin' nuthin' that haint so, that you all 
 done good, very good, in your speakin'. Your nice teacher 
 has been a learnin' you fine an' as I said, you done good." 
 Yes, childern. An' you mus' all been proper behaved in 
 skule, childern, fer nobody can't larn good when they been 
 a cuttin' up, an' misbehavin' an' not a mindin' the nice teach- 
 er's rule. Yes, childern. So I want fer to tell you as how 
 you mus' study hard an' behave good. Now^, childern, do you 
 know what I be? (pause). 
 
 Florildy — I guess mebbe you're teacher's beau (children 
 
 Teacher (smiling) — W'y, w'y, w'y, Florildy, dear, how 
 can you SAY such a thing? 
 
 Mr. Judd (wiping face vigorously zuith bandanna) — Yes, 
 yes, that is, I mean to said, I, yes, wal, (tzmsts bandanna 
 nervously) I wanted fer to have you said I were CLERK 
 
 22 
 
CHRISTMAS SPEAKIN' AT SKAGGS'S SKULE. 
 
 of the SKULE BOARD, childern, yes, CLERK of 
 SKAGGS'S SKULE, childern, an' I was goin' fer to say as 
 how if you study hard an' been good mebbe some day — 
 yes, who knows, childern, mebbe some o' you'll git to been 
 clerk. Wouldn't that be grand, childern? Yes. So you 
 mus' study hard an' been good behaved. Now I can truth- 
 ful say I been glad to been here today with you an' your 
 nice teacher, an' I hope you can all said the same. An' 1 
 wish you all a merry Chris'mus, childern, very merry. Yes 
 (sits, mops face zmth bandanna) . 
 
 Teacher (beaming) — Now, wasn't that a splendid 
 speech? An' we thank Mr. Judd very, very much, don't 
 we, children? 
 
 Children — Yes, ma'am. 
 
 Teacher — An' now, children, we will sing our Santy 
 Claus song, an' who knows, children, mebbe Santy Claus 
 will come right here an' serprise us all (beats time zvith 
 ruler). 
 
 Tune: Wonderful Words of Life 
 
 All Sing — There's a man who lives far away, 
 His name is Santy Claus, 
 He comes with his reindeer an' sleigh, 
 
 His name is Santy Claus; ^ 
 With his bells a ringin', 
 He comes presents bringin', 
 
 Listen, you'll hear (bells ring off stage) 
 Here comes old Santy Claus! 
 Enter Virgil f dressed as Santy Claus) 
 23 
 
CHRISTMAS SPEAKIN' AT SKAGGS'S SKULE. 
 
 Virgil {gruff voice) — Wal, wal, childern, didn't expec* 
 ter see me here today, did ye? Wal, here I be an' I hope 
 yer al glad to see Santy. Now fust thing, I want ter know 
 HAVE YE BEEN GOOD CHILDERN? Have ye? 
 (pause) Have ye been good? 
 
 Tilly (faintly) — Yes, ma'am. 
 
 Billy — Oh, boo-hoo-hoo, boo-hoo-hoo, boo-hoo-hoo! 
 
 Mrs. Skaggs — W'y, Billy, what's the matter? 
 
 Billy — Boo-hoo-hoo, boo-hoo-hoo! Em 'fraid of Santy 
 Claus. 
 
 Mrs. Skaggs — Now, Billy, Santy won't hurt you none. 
 
 Billy (bawling) — ^^I want to gO' home. I want to go 
 home (cries louder and falls dozvn on floor). 
 
 Mrs. Skaggs — Oh, I'm 'fraid he'll have a fit he's so 
 skeered. (to teacher) Tell 'im to take ofif his face so's Billy 
 can see 'im (teacher runs and talks to Virgil who pulls off 
 his false face) . 
 
 Teacher — See, Billy, it's only Virgil. 
 
 Virgil (crossly) — Nice way to spoil our fun (Billy stops 
 crying, looks at Virgil and begins to laugh). 
 
 Teacher — Now, children, we will have a treat and Mr. 
 Judd will help Santy pass it to you ( Virgil and Mr. J. give 
 each one a sack of pop corn and candy as curtain falls). 
 
 curtain 
 
 24 
 
PLAYS, MONOLOGS, Etc. 
 
 AS OrR WASHWOMAN SEES IT. (Edna I, MacKenile.) Tlm«, 10 
 minutes. Nora is seen at the washboard at the home of Mrs. McNeal, 
 where, amidst her work, she engages in a line of gossip concerning 
 her patrons, that will make a hit with any audience. 25 cents. 
 
 ASK OUl.IA. (Edna I. MacKenzie.) Time, 8 minutes. A present- 
 day girl illustrates to her friends the wonders of the Ouija board. Her 
 comments on the mysteries of this present-day fad as she consults 
 Ouija will delight any audience. 26 cents. 
 
 COONTOWN TROUBLES. (Bugbee-Berg.) A lively black-face 
 song given by Josephua Johnslng, Uncle Rastus and other Coon- 
 town folks. 35 cents. 
 
 THE GREAT CHICKEN STEALING CASE OF EBENEZER 
 COl'NTY. (Walter Richardson.) A negro mock trial for 9 males. 2 
 females and jurors. Time, 35 minutes. Any ordinary room easily ar- 
 ranged. From start to finish this trial is ludicrous to the extreme 
 and will bring roars of laughter from the audience. 2S cents. 
 
 THE GREAT WHISKEY-STEALING CASE OF RUMBOLD TS. 
 RYEBOLD. (Walter Richardson.) A mock trial for 11 males and 
 jury. The fun increases as the trial proceeds, and reaches a climax 
 when the jury decides who stole the whiskey. 25 cents. 
 
 HERE'S TO THE LAND OF THE STARS AND THE STRIPES. 
 (Bugbee- Worrell.) Open your minstrel with this rousing patriotic 
 song. Sheet music. 36 cents. 
 
 THE KINK IN KIZZIE'S WEDDING. (Mary Bonham.) Time. 20 
 minutes. For 7 males and 5 females. A colored wedding that will 
 convulse any audience with laughter. Said to be the fuuniest mock 
 wedding ever produced. 25 cents. 
 
 SHE SAYS SHE STUDIES. A monologue. (Edna 1. MacKen«le.) 
 A 'sentimental high-school girl seated with her books preparing the 
 next day's lessons, in a highly original and entertaining manner, ex- 
 presses her views on the merits of her various studies and her un- 
 biased opinion of her teachers, as she proceeds from book to book in 
 the order of her recitation; but when she has finished, you will agree 
 that she is very much more of an entertainer than a student. 
 26 cents. 
 
 SUSAN GETS READY FOR CHURCH. (Edna I. MacKenzie.) 
 Time. 10 minutes. It is time for church and Susan, at her toilet, is 
 excitedly calling for missing articles and her rapid line of gossip about 
 her friends and of certain church activities will bring many a laugh. 
 26 cents. 
 
 THAT AWFUT^ LETTER. A comedy of unusual merit, In one act. 
 (Edna I. MacKenzie.) For five ^:irls. Time, 30 minutes. Recom- 
 mended for high schools, societies and churches. Elizabeth Norton, an 
 accomplished college girl from the country, has been reluctantly and 
 rudely invited to visit a city cousin. Margaret Neilson, whom she has 
 never seen. Finding she is expected to be gawky and uneducated, 
 Elizabeth acts the part perfectly. Developments follow thick and 
 fast amid flashes of wit, humor and satire from Elizabeth., who at 
 last reveals her real self. Margaret's humiliation is complete and 
 there is a happy ending. All the charat2ter« are good. The country 
 cousin is a star. 26 cents. 
 
 THE UNEXPECTED GUEST. A one-act comedy. (Edna I. Mac- 
 Kenzie.) Six females. Time. 45 minutes. The unexpected arrival of 
 an eccentric aunt throws, a family into a state of excitement and 
 dismay, but before the play is over the unwelcome aunt has en- 
 deared herself to her riatives In quite an unexpected manner. Funny 
 situations throughout. 26 cents. 
 
 Paine Publishing Company Dasrton, Ohio 
 
LIBRARY OF CONGRESS 
 
 CHRISTMAS ENTE 
 
 CHBISTMAS AT PUNKIN HOLl ft «ic inio ==:;■■;: 
 
 One of the most popular Christmas p ^ VIO IWo 557 9 ^^ 
 
 clean, wholesome fun from beginning to ena. at ut:i/i^i.a v-« 
 
 of the teacher of an old-faahioned "deestric school" in conducting the 
 last rehearsal for the Christmas EJntertalnment. Children and grown- 
 ups will be delighted with CHRISTMAS AT PUNKIN HOLLER. 25c. 
 
 CHRISTMAS AT MCCARTHY'S. (Elizabeth P. GupUU.) A Christ- 
 mas play for young folks and children that is brimful of fun from 
 start to close and is interspersed with the gentlest pathos. All the 
 characters are good. Easy to produce. No special scenery or cos- 
 tumes. No Santa Claus. Can be played in any schoolroom. 26c. 
 
 CHRISTMAS SPEAKEN' AT SKAGOS'S 8KULE. (Marie Irish.) 
 Just published. Humorous entertainment for six boys and eight girls, 
 including Ole, the Swede; Rastus, the negro; bashful Bill; Jeremiah 
 Judklns, the skule clerk; Mis' Skaggs and Mis' Hill, the mothers who 
 "help out;" fat little sister; Matildy and Florildy, the twins; Sam 
 who st-t-tut-ters; Tiny, and Miss Emmeline Elkins, the teacher. The 
 speech by the skule clerk and the fake Santy Claus are features. 25c. 
 
 CHRISTMAS DIALOGUES. (Cecil J. Richmond.) Every dialogue 
 In this book is decidedly to the point and easy to prepare. They will 
 delight both young and old. The book contains the following: Is 
 There a Santa Clause? (2 small children, Santa Claus and choru8> ; 
 Herbert's Discovery (2 boys); The Christmas Dinner (2 little girlu. 
 1 larger girl, and 2 boys); Playing Santa Claus (1 small and 2 larger 
 boys); A Double Christmas Gift (2 small girls, 2 larger girls, and 3 
 boys). Many customers have told us that the last named dialogue is 
 worth the price of the book. 25 cents. 
 
 EVERGREEN AND HOLtT— SONG AND DRILL. (Elizabeth F. 
 Guptill. A drill for any even number of boys and girls, or all girls. The 
 girls carry garlands of evergreen while the boys carry wreaths of the 
 same. After a spectacular drill and fancy march they all sing a beau- 
 tiful Christmaji song, which accompanies the drilL Easy to produce and 
 decidedly novel. 25 cents. 
 
 GOOD-BYE, CHRISTMAS GROUCHES. (Irish -Lyman. ) A jolly 
 Christmas song for any number of boys and girls. It abounds with 
 Christmas cheer and many pleasant surprises. Full of action. Sheet 
 music. This popular song will put "pep" in your Christmas enter- 
 tainment and will furnish your audience a rare treat. 35 cents. 
 
 POINSETTIA DRILL. (Marie Irish.) A drill for 12 or more 
 girls carrying poinsettias. Given to the music of a lively march, 
 interspersed with verses to the tune of the song. "Comin' Through 
 the Rye." Several diagrams make clear the following of the direc- 
 tions. One of the most beautiful Christmas drills published, 26 cents. 
 
 SANTA CLAUS IS COMING. (Irlsh-Garster.) Song for Uttle 
 folks. Easy words and simple action. A pleasing little song that the 
 children will enjoy giving and others will enjoy hearing, because of 
 its merry humor. Sheet music. 35 cents. 
 
 STARS OF BETHLEHEM. (Irlsh-Leyman.) A beautiful song of 
 the Christ Child for either teolo or chorus. The music is sweet and 
 perfectly suited to the beautiful worda A delightful number for 
 children or adults. Sheet music, 35 cents. 
 
 SNOWBOUND FOB CHRISTMAS. (Edna 1. MacKenxie.) For 4 
 boys and 4 girls. Time, 25 minutes. The roads being blocked by a recent 
 snowstorm, the Simpson family has not been able to get to town to 
 do their Christmas shopping. After considerable lamenting by the 
 children over their disappointment, Ma Simpson, Pa Simpson, and 
 the older children determine upon home-made presents, which results 
 in a most pleasant surprise. 25 cents. 
 
 TOPSY TURVY CHBISTMAS, A. (Elizabeth F. Guptill.) A de- 
 cidedly humorous Christmas play for any number of children from six 
 to twelve years old. The children are tired of "minding" and of 
 everything being "just so," so they start to find a place where things 
 will be different. There is a pleasing surprise for the audience at every 
 turn of the play. 26 cents. 
 
 Paine Publishing Company 
 
 Dajrtonf Ohio 
 
■BiBli 
 
 016 103 557 9 
 
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