C0PYfll6HT.l6e9, BY MAROLD ROOHBACM) 3&0Orbac|^'S full DPSrcipttbcCataloQUr of Dramas, Comedies, Comediettas, Farces, Tableaux-vivants, Guide-books, Novel Entertainments for Church, School and Parlor Exhibitions, etc., containing complete and explicit information, will be sent to any address on receipt of a stamp for return postage. Address as above. ROORBACK'S AMERICAN EDITION. PRICE, 15 CENTS EACH. This scries embraces the liest of plays, suited to the present time. The reprints have been rigidly compared with the original acting copies, so that absolute purity of text and stage business is w.irrantcii. Each play is furnished with an introduction of the greatest valull^p the stage manager, containing the argument or synopsis of incidents, complete lists of properties and costumes, diagrams of the stage settings and practicable scene-plots, with the fullest stage directions. They are hand- somely pfated from new electrotype plates, in readable type, on fine paper. Their coniplete introductions, textual accuracy, and mechanical excellence render these books far superior in every respect to all editions of acting plays hitherto publisheJ. 1. ALL THAT GLITTERS IS NOT GOLD. A comic drama in two acts. Six male, three female characters. Time, two hours. 2. A SCRAP OF PAPER. A comic drama in three acts. Six male, six female ■:liaracte;s. Time, two hours. :;, MY LORD*IN LIVERY. A farce in one act. Five male, three female charac- ters. 1 I me, fifty minutes. 4 CABMAN No. 93. A farce in one act. Two male, two female characters. lime, forty minutes. 5. MILKY WHITE. A domestic drama in two acts. Four male, two female char acters. Tinie, one hour and three quarters. 6. PARTNERS FOR LIFE. A comedy in three acts. Seven male, four female characters. Time, two hours. 7. WOODCOCK'S LITTLE GAME. A comedy-faice in two acts. Four male, f jiir female charicters. Time, one hour. 8. HOW^ TO TAME YOUR MOTHER-IN-LAW. A farce in one act. Four male, two female characters. Time, thirty-five minutes, g. LADY AUDLEY'S SECRET. A drama in two acts. Four m.ile, three female ch.Tr.icters. rime, one hour and a quarter. 10. NOT SO^AD AFTER ALL. A comedy in three acts. Six male, five female charactersi^Time, one hour and forty minutes. 11. WHICH IS WHICH ? A comedietta in one act. Three male, three female characters. Time, fifty minutes. 12. ICI ON PARLE FRAN^AIS. A farce in one act. Three male, four female cliaracters. Time, forty-five minutes. 13. DAISY FARM. A drama in four acts. Ten male, four female characters. Time, two hours and twenty minutes. 14. MARRIED LIFE. A comedy in three acts. Five male, five female characters. Time, two hoitrs. 15. A PRETTY PIECE OF BUSINESS. A comedietta in one act. Two tnale, three female characters. Time, fifty minutes. l5. LEND ME FIVE SHILLINGS. A farce in one act. Five male, two female characters. Time, o,ne hour. 17. UNCLE TOM'S CABIN.— Original Version. A drama in six acts. Fifteen male, seven female characters. Time, three hours. iS. UNCLE TOM'S CABIN.— New Version. A drama in five acts. Seven male, five female characters. Time, two hours and a quarter. 19. LONDON ASSURANCE. A comedy in five acts. Ten male, three female characters. Time, two hours and three quarters. 20. ATCHI ! ■ A comedietta in one act. Three male, two female characters. Time, forty minutes. 21. WHO IS WHO? A farce in- one act. Three male, two female characters. Time, forty minutes. 22. THE WOVEN WEB. A drama in four acts. Seven male, three female char- acters. Time, two hours and twenty minutes. \.}iy o/tlie above will be sent by mail, J>osi-J>aid, to any address, en reccift 0/ till- J>>-ice. ' HAROLD ROORBACH, Publisher, 9 Murray St., New York. HOW TO TAME YOUR MOTHER-IN-LAW A FARCE IN ONE ACT BY HENRY J. BYRON New American Edition, Correctly Reprinted from the Ori- ginal Authorized Acting Edition, with the Original Cast of the Characters, Synopsis of Incidents, Time of Representation, Description of the Costumes. Scene and Property Plots, Dia- gram OF the Stage Setting, Sides of Entrance and Exit, Relative Posi- tions OF THE Performers, Expla- nation of the Stage Direc- tions, ETC., AND ALL OF THE Stage Business. Copyright, 1889, by Harold Roorbach. V^'NGTON. NEW YORK HAROLD ROORBACH PUBLISHER How to Tame Your Mother-in-law. CAST OF CHARACTERS. First performed at the Strand Theatre, London, under the management of Mrs. Swanborough, on Monday, May joth, 1864. Samson Whiffles (a tea dealer) Mr. H T Turner Mr. Timothy Spangle V« ^^^V M; * ? Th„inl' Mrs. Whiffles [Samson^s better-half] l]] V ' " Miss E Tohn^Ze' Mrs. Incubus (Samson^s mother-in-law).. . ' ■[ M * -'S"'^°"!' Time of Representation— Thirty-five Minutes. SYNOPSIS OP INCIDENTS. ""F'^V ^''^'^S retired, and shawl on a chair. Durfne heribsil If^^^v'^^^'"^ ^^^ *^°""et find her lord absent nresur.blv.n?'-^^''f; Whiffles returns to bonnet and Shaw SoXeso^?toVrZ^^ ^"^' discovering the Incubus then corerback, dtgus^Tthe "a[nfJ^'"rJ'r •■'^^^'^- ^'^^• the house, and is extremely dilcontrtiX^S'raiiLtof HOW TO TAME YOUR MOTHER-IN-LAW. 3 time disguised as a costermonger. Whiffles is then brought in deplor- ably drunk, and realizing that his condition is not comme il/aict, conceals hniiself in the preserve closet just as his mother-in-law re-enters ready to shake the dust of the premises from her feet. But in the act of departure, she is met by Spangle, now got up as a policeman, charged with a breach of the revenue laws, and directed to retire to her room while he fetches a cab in which to convey her to prison. While pretending to call the cab, the policeman is met 'by the irate Mr. Hunx, in anxious search of Spangle and his money. The "pohceman " now tells Hunx that the absconding debtor is at that very moment in the next room, disguised as a woman in order to effect his escape, and advises Hunx to collar his victim at once, promising to be at hand in case of need Im- mediately on Mrs. Incubus' reappearance, she is seized by Hunx, but rescued by Mrs. Whiffles, who comes in opportunely. In the course of the uproar, Whiffles, smeared with preserves, emerges from his place of concealment, declares his independence of petticoat government, and asserts his domestic authority. Spangle then comes forward and is in- stantly recognized by Hunx, but silences the latter by referring to his conduct at a ball on the previous night. Mrs. Incubus is now thoroughly subdued, and Spangle, though he declines to enter into any explana- tions, offers to set forth in a practical manner, as frequently as required, the whole art of "How to Tame Your Mother-in-Law." COSTUMES. Samson. — Business suit; hat. Tompkins. — Ordinary waistcoat and trousers ; calico shirt, without collar; apron. Mr. Hunx. — Business suit; hat. Spangle. — ist dress; business suit, hat and cane. 2d dress ; burlesque smuggler's disguise, jd dress; costermonger's costume. 4th dress ; policeman's uniform, shield and club. Mrs. Whiffles | r^ ,. „ • , , , , . Mrs. Incubus f — '-'™i"^ry walking dresses, bonnets and shawls. STAGE SETTING. £tt*rioT Sadking . w».^ ' I t^uar III ^ I Door 2ioer I Chair Scene. — Plain chamber in 3 o., backed with interior backing in 4 o. Doors R., L., and c. Closet r. c. in flat. Sofa up L. Chairs r. c. and L. c. 4 HOW TO TAME YOUR MOTHER-IN-LAW. PROPERTIES. Labels and boxes. Bell behind stage. Candles, bar of soap, and pre- serves in closet. R. c. Letter in brown envelope for Tompkins. Money, watch and flask for Whiffles. Two handkerchiefs (one very ragged), short pipe, bottle, and parcel for SpANGLE. Money and flask in satchel for Mrs. Incubus. • STAGE DIRECTIONS. The player is supposed to face the audience. R, means right ; L. , left; C, center; R. c, right of center; L. c, left of center; i e., first entrance; 2 E., second entrance; i, 2 or 3 G., first, second or third grooves. UP STAGE, toward the back; down stage, toward the footlights. R. R. C. C. L. C. L. Note. — The text of this play is correctly reprinted from the original authorized acting edition, without change. The introductory matter has been carefully prepared by an expert, and is the only part of this book protected by copyright. How to Tame Your Mother-in-Law. SCENE. — Parlor behind a little grocer's shop — Doors, R., L., R. C. and into shop, c. Tompkins /«j/z«^ labels on boxes. Tom. "Mrs. Whiffles, passenger to Frumpington." That's all right : and so missus is going out of town : she says it's for the benefit of her health. I'm sure it will be for the benefit of my health, and master's too — poor fellow. I never knew such a tartar as missis, never ! Talk of Timour, the Tartar, as I see last boxing night ! He is a regular lamb in armor, compared to Mrs. Whiffles. I hope she won't hurry back on our account ; master an' me can do without her, 'specially me. Here she comes, so as music 'ath power to sooth the savage breast, why {ar- ranges boxes — sings) "I'm afloat, I'm afioat " Enter Mrs. Whiffles, 'R.^paces the stage. Mrs. W. You're afloat indeed — you're a fool. Tom. Thankee, mum. Mrs. W. Don't answer — I hate boys that answer. Tom. I don't answer, mum, at least master said so after he'd tried me a week. Mrs. W. Hold your tongue, sir, and leave the drawing-room. Tom. {aside) He, he, he ! calls the little parlor behind the shop, a droring-room ! I'm a going, mum. (exit door, c.) Mrs. W. Yes, Mr. Sampson Whiffles your patient wife can bear a great deal, but there are bounds, which even the most trusting woman — but what's the use of complaining ? What are wives but beasts of burden — camels ? But the last straw breaks the camel's back, and I have had the last straw. My dear old darling of a mamma, the kindest, gentlest, best of mothers and mothers-in-law, proposes to come and stay on a visit, and Mr. Whiffles objects, positively grumbles ! But I'll be even with my 6 HOW TO TAME YOUR MOTHER-IN-LAW. eentleman-rU go and see her, and not come back till he sends for me which hf'll be too glad to do. in a couple of days. When I'm away, he'll soon find what a treasure I am. Enter WHIFFLES, C door from shop. Whif. My dear, have you any idea TVTrs W No, I haven't ! , , ,. Whif Hem ! {aside) Weather-glass points to stormy, {aloud) Do vou know, my dear, if we are out ot soap Tvrra W Oh drop the shop. I m sick ot it . Whif Tf 1 drop the shop, my dear, the shop will very soon dr^me That's my reason for Hving on the ground floor in- stead ^f upstairs ; I didn't want to be above my business-dye see ? That's not so bad. Mrs W W^ell, as you don't wish to have ma here—— Whif But when mothers-in-law come to live with their daugh- ter^ they've a knack of-of-of-not going away again ; however, '^MrV"w'"oh;no,sir, mymamma is too proud to force her presence upon any one-however, I am go^ng to see her ; I hav-e So doubt vou will survive my absence. Plenty of your lad> cus- tomers to^whom you are so polite, will be ready to sympathize wiThy^u in your [onely concfition-I don't suppose )-« U^miss "" Whif. (aside) Weather, glass points to much rain. My dear, I hope you'll enjoy yourself, and bring back Mrs. W. Mamma ? "Whif No : a better temper. ^ Mrs W i a better temper ? Why, you good-for-nothing, ugly, unkind little tyrant-I've the best temper in the world Whif Very hkely ; but you're a perfect mistress i^/he art of disguising it ! Well. Tompkins shall letch a cab. {calls) Tomp- kins ' Enter TOMPKINS, C. Tompkins ! Tom. Yes sir. ■Whif. Go and fetch a cab. ^:„ior Tom I've got one, sir ! Sich a hoss— a gray mare— nglar racer— rattle vou down to the station m no time, mum. Mrs. W. {aside) I do believe they're glad to get nd of me. (aloud) Carry my boxes to the cab. ■Hoor;,v ToJ. Yes^, with the ve,y grea.es, P'"-- ^(^ ;f >, «°°'^^':i hooray, missis is a going ! le^" "'^ ' Mrs. W And now, good morning ! ■ ,^ Whif. Good morning, my dear. What, am t you agoing to- e(\'i [indicating a desire to be saluted) Mrs. W. (^/e/^r^/j) Sampson Whiffles, if/^« had fifty mothers. I/O IV TO TAME YOUR MOTHER-IN-LAW. 7 and they wanted to come and stay with you, I should smile upon you and say " bring 'em." Whif. I don't know where you'd put 'em though. One salute. Mrs. W. No, sir ! When I return, may you be more alive to the treasure you possess. Oh, what did I ever marry you for ! (exit, C.) "Whif. Sampson Whiffles, when you led to the hymeneal altar the lovely and accomplished Angelica Incubus, you considered yourself the happiest fellow in world. Six weeks after that aus- picious event, you came to the conclusion that there wasn't a more miserable devil breathing. Here have I been married a year and a half, and 1 can hardly believe it to be less than twenty years. 1 don't believe that I'm thirty-two ; I'm firmly convinced I'm at least sixty. I'm prematurely old ; I feel it — my hair's turning gray — I'm getting weak in the knees — in fact, I'm wretch- ed, and yet my wife is a charming woman. Ah, there's no mistake about that ; everybody said so before we were married, and of course it must be so ; but all I know is, if I get a chance of being married again, I shall fix my affections on anything but a charming woman — I shall select a regular sour piece of goods, and with the less teeth the better ; but no more of your charm- ing women for Sampson Whiffles. Enter TOMPKINS, C, with letter in brown envelope. Tom. Letter, sir. Whif. Is there ? Tom. Yes, sir, and there's some'at else. Whif. What ? Tom. There's twopence to pay for it. Whif. {gives money) What impudence ! (Tompkins goes off, door, C.) Who's this from ? I should like to know — the post mark says Fru Oh, lord ! It's a letter from my mother-in- law — Angelica's ma. Ha, ha ! {opens letter) Charming old lady, she is. The late Mr. Incubus died in a lunatic asylum — don't wonder at it — I think his daughter is making out Jiiy ticket for Hanwell ; but she don't do it. No, I'll die sane if I go mad in the attempt ! {reads — gets excited— falls into chair) Tomp- kins ! Tompkins ! {jumping up) Tompkins ! Enter Tompkins, c.,^ — Whiffles seizes him. Whif. Mistaken infant — infinitesimal — homoeopathic dose of humanity, why were you ever born ? Tom. Lord, master, have you got the hydro-for-beer ? Whif. Why — why did you bring me this letter ? Instrument of torture, speak ! Had you annihilated-me — crunched— smashed — squashed me ! Oh, misery ! {falls into a chair) 8 HOW TO TAME YOUR MOTHER-IN-LAW. Tom. What's the matter, sir ? Has a customer bolted ? He's got delirium tremendous. Whif. So this dreadful woman is coming on a visit, is she .'' She's coming to fasten herself like a remorseless leech upon her son and daughter, eh ? To make my life more miserable — my Angelica more suspicious — my home more like a wasp's nest than it ever was, is she ? What am I to do ? I haven't a soul to help me, — not one— not one ! Exit Tompkins, c. Span, (itt shop — sittgs) "When the heart of a man is oppressed." Whif. Ha, that voice, that toone — 'tis he ! Enter Spangle, c, — melodramatic start. Span. What, my Whiffles — companion of childhood — friend of my boyhood — confidant of my riper years ; ha, ha ! embrace me. {cmlyrace) "Whif. What on earth brings you to town ? I thought you were engaged for six months at the Theatre Royal, Little Snod- grass. Span. Whiffles, the T. R. Little Snodgrass is a swindle — the company invisible — the manager a myth, and the audiences — such audiences, Whiffles — three old women and a baby in the pit two orders in the boxes, and a butcher boy and woman, with nuts, inthegallery — that's a crowded house. Who could spout Shake- speare to such a select few .? not Timothy Spangle. No, I con- tented myself with spouting my chronometer, and with a heavy sigh and a light carpet bag, I bade adieu to Little Snodgrass and the Little Snodgrassians. Whif. No doubt leaving them inconsolable at your departure. Span. Only one person regretted that, I believe. Whif. Who was that ? Span. My landlord ; the confiding individual, after swindling me m every way he could for six weeks, suddenly grew nervous for the rent and seized my wardrobe. Whif. Your wardrobe ? Span. Yes, a pair of old tights, two dilapidated russet boots and a shoe horn. I saw the old rascal at a fancy ball last night, dancing away with a debardeur at the " Thistle and Broomstick." But I say, old fellow, you don't look altogether lively— what's the matter ? Don't married life agree with you ? Whif. Oh, yes, I'm lively — very lively. Span. Are you ? Well, p'raps you are ; but your liveliness is exactly like my misery. Come, unbosom yourself — what's the matter, business shaky .'' Whif. Firm as ever — increasing. Span. Lungs sound ? Whif. Listen. {^prepares to shout) HO IV TO TAME YOUR MOTHER-IN-LAW. g' Span. Thankee, don't exert yourself. Ah, I see I Mrs. Whif- fles and you don't altogether hit it ; or rather you do hit it and have a fight now and then. Whif. No jokes on such a subject. Span. No, it's no laughing matter. Ah, my boy, you were happy when we used to play Macbeth together in the loft, don't you remember ? " Lay on Macduff and damn'd be he who first cries ' hold, enough ! ' " [crosses to R.) Thrilling, wasn't it .-' Whif. I beg to say I've had quite enough, I'm out of Span. What — candles ? Said so ; been paying your taxes — found the price of brooms risen, eh .-' Chicory dearer ? Rise in sand, eh ? You look as if you'd got a man in possession. Whif. I shall have a woman in possession soon. The fact is, I've got a sword hanging over my head. Span, {looking up) Where ? Whif. Bother ! Have you never heard of Damocles ? Span. D n Damocles ! go on ! Whif. Timothy, did you ever have a mother-in-law ? Span. No ; but I've got a cousin-german. Whif, Of course not ; you're a bachelor. Well, my wife you know, is a charming person ! Span. Ah ! a splendid woman — expansive — plenty of her ! Whif. But, unfortunately, she's a leetle — ^just a leetle warm- tempered — breaks all the furniture twice a week, likes to have her own way, you know, and, I'm sadly afraid that by the time she's sixty Span She'll be a regular tommyhawk — a downright old she bear — gray, but grizzly. Whif. She's gone on a visit. Span. Hooray ! then, my boy, we'll have a regular holiday- time of it. I've nothing to do — I'll stop with you till she returns. I'll do anything to make myself useful ; crush the lump, pick the flies out of the treacle — anything ! Whif. Thankee ; but, unfortunately, her dear mamma, her dear mamma, I say Span. Yes, she'll be dear to you, I dare say ; you wouldn't mind her being lost to sight — to memory dear. "Whif. This awful old woman intends quartering herself- Span. Yes, her elderly and snuffy self Whif. Exactly ; on me. Now, when once she enters these doors, adieu comfort, authority, self-respect, peaceful hours Span. British brandy ! Whif. Everything an Englishman prizes. She'll put my wife up to all sorts of rebellious tricks, and as soon as she arrives, she'll drive me to a wat'ry grave. Span. Then as soon as she arrives, I should drive her to the Waterloo Station, and pack her home again. What, Sampson lo HOW TO TAME YOUR MOTHER-IN-LAW, Whiffles, do you intend to give up your home to a disagreeable, sponging old woman, who can afford to keep away, but who, once admitted, will be like blackbeetles — impossible to get rid of— don't say you do, for I don't believe you. I know that beneath those Nankeen trousers — I mean under that elaborately spotted waistcoat — beats a lieart as brave as Ccesar's, and as undaunted as Coriolanus's. Forget not, my boyhood's friend and pitcher, that the blood of all the Whiffleses darts through my Sampson's veins ; that a long and noble line of ancestry looks down upon you, exclaiming with universal voice, " Sampson WhifHes, remember your family, pack off your mother-in-law ; or give in. succumb, immolate youi'self beneath Mrs. Juggernaut Incubus, deliver up your prerogative, surrender your house and authority, and dwindle gradually into a miserable henpeck'd, mother-in-law- mangled, trick'd, trodden down, trampled on, little tea-dealer, with a heart the size of a penn'orth of blue, and no more spirit than a short si.x." {crosses L.) Wliif. What you say's all very true, Tim ; but, somehow, since I've been married, I've lost all my courage — I've grown, as nervous as a kitten. I haven't the pluck to order off mother-in- law ; I Span. You haven't ! Who said you had ? Of course not, I'll do the thing for you, you shan't appear at all in the business ; I alone, with bended bow and "quiver full of arrows" — no, I mean my carpet-bag full of properties — will undertake to erad- icate this domestic plague, and send her back to her souchong and scandal at Frumpington quicker than ever she came away. Whif. No violence, Tim. Span. Violence ! The man who would raise a finger against a defenceless woman — — Whif. Just so, that'll do, but how mmU you manage ? Span. In my carpet bag I managed to conceal from the wary eyes of my landlord, Mr. Hunx, a few things, wigs, etc. ; with the aid of these, . I'll amuse Mrs. Inkybus during your absence. You'll have pressing business out, of course, and — ha, ha, ha ! — glorious ! by the time you return, put me down as pantomime super if Mrs. I. isn't cured forever of her son-in-law's oppres- sive tendencies. Whif. If she is. Spangle, you shall have Span. What ? Whif. My blessing. Span. Oh ! thank'ee. Enter TOMPKINS, C.,from shop. Tom. Please, sir, 'ere's a old lady inquiring for you. "Whif. Oh, lor ! {falls into Spangle's arms. Tom. The cabman's a follerin' of her, and a blackguarding of her, and a callin* of her names. HOW TO TAME YOUR MOTHER-IN-LAW. n V7hif. Oh, lor ! Span. Don't be a fool, man, summon up the courage of a tea- dealer and a gentleman, and meet your dear mamma-in-law like a man. Mrs. I. [without) I tell you I won't give you a farthing more, so be off, you impertinent fellow ! "Whif. You won't desert me, Spangle .-' Span. Desert you .-' hear me swear .'' {kneels on pocket-hand- kerchief) Whif. No, no, don't swear, it agitates me. Do I look pallid } Span. Rubicund as pickle cabbage, my boy. Whif. Go along then. Span. Sustain your stamina, put a bold face on it, rely on the companion of your childhood. My carpet bag's contents must gain the day, My soul's in arms and eager for the fray. Ha, ha, ha ! Exit, melo-drantatically, R. Tom. {imitates him) Ha, ha, ha ! {goes off, shop door) Whif. Now ! Sampson Whiffles, be a man, be a man. Now for the detestable old fiend in female form. Enter MRS. Incubus, C. {affectionately) My darling mother-in-law, delighted to see you. {embrace) bless me, how well you look. Why you don't look a day over five-and-thirty, I declare. How are you ? Mrs. I. I'm in an ill temper. Whif. How extraordinary ! Mrs. I. I've been imposed upon, Sampson. Whif. {aside) She's heard all. Mrs. I. By that cabman — the ruffian ! but you're all alike, you men, you all deceive and cheat us poor, confiding, weak women. Ah ! I wish my poor husband was alive. Whif. (aside) Lucky man. Mrs. I. What did you say ? Whif. I said you were unlucky, ma'am. Mrs. I. Of course I am ; don't want any jackanapes to tell me that. But where's Angelliky .'' "Whif. Who, mother-in-law ? Mrs. I. Angelliky ! Whif. Ah ! Angelica ! Mrs. I. Of course — are you deaf, or drunk ? why isn't she here to receive her ma ? I'm afraid she's as bad as you are, Samp- son, and has almost forgotten her affectionate mother. {'whi7n- pers) Whif. {aside) I never did commit murder, but — {aloud) the fact is, mother-in-law dear Mrs. I. Ha ! all children are alike now-a-days — well, well, I 12 HOW TO TAME YOUk MOTHER-IN-LAW. shan't trouble you much longer. QNkiftl^s pantomimes thanks) I'm a martyr to lumbager, Sampson — I 'as it in my 'ed, and in my harms, and in my back especial — nothing- won't cure it, but a wee drop of sherry, took medicinal, purely medicinal. "Wliif. Ah ! of course — I'm very sorry that Angelica took the keys with her. Mrs. I. Don't trouble yourself. I 'as the attack so often, that I find it convenient to carry a little bottle with me. (pulls out pint black bottle and imbibes) "Whif. {writhing in agony) Oh, bless me ! oh dear ! Mrs. I. What's the matter ^ ■WMf. Oh ! the lumbago ! oh my back, oh ! oh ! Mrs. I. Never knew it was catching. Whif. Oh, yes, it's dreadful ! give me some of your physic, I don't like it, but it'll do me good, (seizes bottle and drinks) I'm much better now. Mrs. I. Oh, it's a wonderful remedy, took medicinal. "Whif. Oh ! I've got it again ! [takes bottle again — pulls out watch) Good gracious ! Mrs. I. What's the matter ? "Whif. Lord bless us ! ten o clock, I must be off. Mrs. I. Off ! "Whif. Yes, didn't I tell you ? Why, mother-in-law, I'm sorry to say that I'm obliged to go to Westminster — I'm on a jury and must go. Mrs, I. You shan't ! Whif. Public justice Mrs. I. What's public justice to your mother-in-law, come all the way from Frumpington, to see her dear children ? Whif. I'm really sorry — but really I must go — perhaps — I say perhaps, you wouldn't object to mind the shop during my ab- sence — my boy's young and prigs the currants. Mrs. I. Mind the shop ? a mother-in-law mind the shop ! Why ain't there an earthquake ? Whif. So good-bye ! good-bye ! [going — aside) I'll go and have a consoler at the " Pig and Whistle," in the court. He, he, he ! I wouldn't be in mother-in-law's shoes for a trifle, (aloud) Oh ! mother-in-law if the water rate calls, tell him I'm out, and shan't be home for a month, (going) Good-bye, mother-in-law. [returns) Oh, if Mrs. Haggle comes for three-and-eight-penny tea, give her two-and-nine — she never pays till she is made. Exit C. door, Mrs. I. (sits) Oh, deary me ! why did I come on this unlucky journey — all to see a ungrateful darter as is out, and avagabone of a son-in-law as goes out, when I might a stayed at home and been as comfortable as it's possible for a lumbagerfied creetur' to be. I was differently treated, when my good man was alive. HOW TO TAME YOUR MOTHER-IN-LAW. 13 I misses him continually ; it's true I was always wishing him to go, but somehow, when he goed, I felt as though I was the lonest and flornest and forsakenest woman in Christendom. Weil, never mind, as my poor husband used to say— it's a walley of tears— and so it is— a world of lonelines and lumbager. Enter Spangle R., as a melodramatic smuggler— burlesque melodrama— noiselessly, and claps MRS. INCUBUS on shoulder — she shrieks. Span. Ha ! ha ! ha ! Mrs. I. Murder ! Span. Another word, and your brains bespatter that wall- one ejaculation, be it but " Oh, lawks ! " and that Kidderminster carpet soaks up your best heart's blood— the slightest movement, even the uncontrollable wink of an eye, seals your dreadtul doom ! Ha, ha ! ,,^, , ^ Mrs. I. {aside) Ah, the garrotting ruffian ! Where s the police. Span. What's that ? Police ! Name agam the wretched myr- midons of a despotic and tyrannous government, and these walls resound to your closing squeals ! Mrs. I. Oh, lor ! Span. But I waste time— I am a fool. Madam, pardon me, you see before you a nobleman. Mrs. I. Do I ? — where ? Span. Here— in this wasted form, this sodden eye, these quiv- ering limbs. I, madam, I am a nobleman— the Lord Mountap- pleblossom. Mrs. I. The Lord Mount Span. Hush ! would you see me a gibbeted traitor on the fatal tree, or a wriggling corse at your feet ? That dreadful name, even whispered, is sufficient to raise a troop of harpies round their victim. Pity me ! 'tis years since I have tasted food. Madam, pity me— I — I am starving. Mrs. I. What am I to do ? Oh, dear ! Span. Why was I ever born, madam .? Madam, I am of an- cient lineage— noble family— tip-top birth. But a ruffianly steward sent me away when young, and now enjoys the title and estates, which of right belong to this shrunken shadow. What wonder then that, like a maniac, I roam the wide and wretched world, an outcast, and earning a bare subsistence by selling winkles, {calls hoarsely) Winkles ! here ye are ! wmk, wink, wink ! n • I 1 Mrs. I. Poor young man ! {aside) A nobleman sell winkles— 'orrible ! Span. But I'm not selling winkles now, lady— no, no, I have done with them, and forever ; but their wretched shells are ever 14 HOW TO TAME YOUR MOTHER-IN-LAW. before me, their worm-like form forever haunts me, and their odor, when too long kept, still hangs around me. JNow, madam, I am — I am Mrs. I. What— what ? Span. Hush ! a smuggler. Shriek not, for your life ! without you'd condemn me for life to a solitary cell and spiders, beneath the lofty walls of frowning Newgate. Here, {unfolds parcel) here I have — start not — a silk dress — smuggled, smuggled {aside) from Spitalfields— for ten shillings — hush ! its value is eight guineas ; but hunger knows not haggling — for half that noble coin yeclept a sov., 'tis yours. Mrs. I. Ten shilling for that splendid silk t cheap as dirt. Span. Lucre is filthy, but it gets us grub. Mrs. I. Oh ! Mr. Smuggler— I mean Mr. no, Lord Winkle — no, I mean, — here's the ten shillings and Span, {kneeling) Bright seraph ! Mrs. I. Go along, I am't a syrup. Span. Beauteous being — my thanks, my heartfelt thanks, ac- cept 'em ; this kindness overpowers me ; {pulls out ragged handkerchief) but no, I will not weep, no ! 'tis unmanly. Oh ! lady — beauteous lady, I'm in love. Mrs I. Poor young man ! Span, 'Tis years since the unhappy Mountappleblossom has heard soft words of pity, {iti tears) they overpower him ; but a truce with woman's tears — yes, lady, and she I love spurns me, she knows not my real condition — she despises the ragged out- cast, and I have but one consolation. Mrs. I. What's that ? Span. Look here — brandy ! beautiful brandy ; brandy that has not paid one farthing duty to Government ! No, no ! See lady, 'tis yours ; and when you have a touch of rheumatism, take first a glass of this, and think at the same time of the poor heart-broken smuggler, who, crushed — despised — ^trampled on — trodden under foot — lives but for revenge ! revenge ! Exit melodrajnafically, R. Mrs. I. Misfortune's turned that young man's brain. How- ever, the silk's cheap ; and as to its being smuggled. Govern- ment won't feel it, I dare say. I'll go and have a look at what's in the larder. Exit L., leaves bonnet and cloak on chair. Enter Mrs. Whiffles, /rtf;« shop. Mrs. W. So, so, no one about — Tompkins master of the shop, and Mr. Whiffles out enjoying himself, I've no doubt. The monster, to think of eating and drinking in the absence of his wife ; but he little thinks that I've returned, and am hovering around the enemy like the fellow in the play ; he thinks I'm at Frumpington by this time, the heartless wretch ! {sits on bon- HOW TO TAME YOUR MOTHER- IN- LA IV. 15 net) What's this ? am I awake ? a woman's bonnet and shawl and not mine ! Oh ! what's to become of me ? — And he really is false to me ; 1, who have been such a fond, patient, gentle wife to him ; but I'll not submit tamely as I always have done. No ! I'll show him I'm not the foolish, weak creature he thinks me • I'll be divorced from the wretch ! You can get one for a triHe.' No, I won't ; I'll go to my ma, I'll pour my griefs into her ear.' Ah ! the wicked, wicked wretch ! Exit, sobbing, r! Enter Mrs. Incubus, l. Mrs. I. There's nothing at all in the larder, but some mint sauce, and a bit ot beel suet ; Tompkins and I can't make a dinner off that. Enter ToMPKINS/r^;« shop. What's your name ? Tom. My name is Tompkins, "on the Grapplin 'ills." Mrs. I. None of your low poetry, I 'ate it ; Tompkins, I want you to get me a chop. Tom. A chop ? [shop bell) Shop ! Exit C. qtiick Mrs. I. Ugh ! The 'orrid creature ! Enter SPANGLE, as a cosiermojtger, with short pipe, black eye. Span. Well ! this here's a werry pooty conducted sort of a 'stablishment, this is ! A werry pooty sort of a house to call after a great battle. Hinkermann 'ouse — Hinkermann 'ouse indeed ! It's a Hinkermann bad shop at all events. " 'Arf a bounce of bird's hi," ses I. " Haltogether hout o'bird's hi," ses he. " 'Arf a bounce o' hanythink you 'as," ses I. " Haltogether hout o' heverythink," ses he. " You're the proprietor of the shop 1" ses I. " You're hout," ses he. "Where his the proprietor.''" ses I. " He's hout," ses he. " Where's the proprietress ? " ses I. " She's hout as well," ses he. "Well if they're hall hout," ses I, "just step into the parlor and give us a light to this pipe by the fire." " The fire's hout too," ses he. "Well," ses I, " ifhevery- think's hout, what d'ye call this Hinkermann 'ouse for ? " What do you say, old gal ? Mrs. I. What a 'orrid wretch. Oh ! I wish I was back home. — catch me visiting my darter again in a hurry ! Span. Heverybody knows me — I don't hide my 'ed under no bushel, I don't put my beak into no sand like the pellikian of the deserts ! Heverybody knows my sentiments. I'm for wote by ballad — universal sufferings— the dooty off heverythink — no hin- come tax and no hincomes. As for the five p'ints of the charter — I'm good for a gallon any day. Wot I ses is — " A fair day's wages for a fair day's work," I ses, so 1 never does nothink. Mrs. I. I'll stand this no longer. I'll go to my room, put the things back in the box, go home at once, and never come and ,6 HOW TO TAME YOUR MOTHER-IN-LAW. bumper house on the occasion of my last beneht. Let me see, how does it go ? SONG. — '' Poor Susian.'' 'Twas near the Boro' Market that there dwelt a fine young man ; He fe Hn love with a damsiel, which her name was Susian ; ?hey always were a making love, just like ^ Pj;- ^^ 1?°°"^^^^,, Hall the mornings, hall the heven-ings, and hall the afternoons. Well, matters had been going on like that a yf^^^'}^""'^^ When Susian remarked one day " My age is thirty -tour, T fppl as T am pettins? on. I am not a young gal, • , .. And I should v'ery much like to know^f your views is mat-n-mo-ni-al. Says he, " What is your property ? Though lucre I d'^spis^e But we cannot live on nothink, which to try would not be wise , We're both on us got appetites, which satisfied must be, And we can't have proper dinners if we ain't got proper-tea. Says she, "Oh, James, you've called me oft, 'My beautiful, my hown,' And said as how you did adore mc for myself alone ; I give thee all -I can no more— as says one of the songs, ^^ I've got six pounds, a silvier watch, and a pair of sugiar tongs. Says he, " 'Taint much considering how much purvission's riz, But we'll be married next Sunday three weeks as ever is ; The sweets of matrimony will improve life's bitter cup, ^^ Some folks would put dimjl'fied in the stdge-setting as to be easily represented by dramatic clubs and travelling companies with limited scenery. Uncle Tom's Cabin is a play that never grows old ; being pure and faultless, it commands the praise of the pulpit and sup- port of the press, while it enlists the favor of all Christians and heads of familits. It will draw hundreds where other plays draw dozens, and therefore is sure to fill any hal . Synopsis of Incidents: Act I. — Scene I.—'X\\e. Shelby plantation in Kentucky. — George and Eliza. — The curse of Slavery. — The resolve. — Off for Canada. — " I won't be taken — I'll die first." — Shelby f nd Haley. — Uncle Tom and Harry must be sold. — The poor mother. — " Sell my boy ! " — The faithful slave. Scene II. — Gumption Cute. — " By Gum !" — Marks, the lawyer. — A mad Yankee. — George in di.sguise. — A friend in need. — The human bloodhounds. — The escape. — " Hooray fer old Var- mount ! " Act II. — St. Clare's elegant home. — The fretful wife. — The arrival. — Little Eva. — Aunt Ophelia and Topsy. — " O, Golly! I'se so wicked!" — St. Clare's opinion. — " Benighted innocence." — The stolen gloves. — Topsy in her glory. Act III. — The angel child. — Tom and St. Clare. — Topsy's mischief. — Eva's re- quest. — The promise. — pathetic scene. — Death of Eva. — St. Clare's grief. — " For thou art gone forever." Act IV. — The lonely house. — Tom and St. Clare. — Topsy's keepsake. — Deacon Perry and Aunt Ophelia. — Cute on deck. — A distant relative. — The hungry visitor. — Chuck full of emptiness." — Cute and the Deacon. — A row. — A fight. — Topsy to the rescue. — St. Clare wounded. — Death of St. Clare. — " Eva — Eva — ^I am coming " Act V. — Legree's plantation on the Red River. — Home again. — Uncle Tom's noble heart. — " My soul ain't yours, Mas'r." — Legree's cruel work. — Legree and Cassy. — The white slave. — A frightened brute. — Legree's fear.— A life of sin. — Marks and Cute. — A new scheme. — The dreadful whipping of Uncle Tom. — Legree punished at last. — Death of Uncle Tom. — Eva in Heaven. THE WOVEN WEB. A DRAMA IN FOUR ACTS, BY CHAS. TOWNSEND. PRICE, 15 CENTS. Seven male, three female characters, viz. : leading and second juvenile men, so- ciety villain, walking gentleman, eccentric comedian, old man, low comedian, leading juvenile lady, soubretie and old woman. Time of playing, aj^ hours. The Woven Weu is a flawless drama, pure in thought and action, with excellent characters, and pre- senting no difficulties in costumes or scenery. The story is captivating, with a plot of the most intense and unflagging interest, rising to a natural climax of wonderful power. The wit is bright and sparkling, the action terse, sharp and rapid. In touch- ing the great chord of human sympathy, the author has expended that rare skill which has given life to every great play known to the stage. This play has been produced under the author's management with marked success, and will prove an unquestionable attraction wherever presented. Synopsis of Incidents: Act I.- Parkhurst & Manning's law office. New York. — Tim's opinion. — The young lawyer. — " Majah Billy Toby, sah ! " — Love and law. — Bright prospects. — Bertha's misfortune. — A false friend. — The will destroyed. — A cunning plot. — Weaving the web. — The unseen witness. — The letter. — Accu.sed. — Dishonared. Act II. — Winter quarters. — Colonel Hastings and Sergeant Tim. — Moseg. — A message. — Tim on his dignity. — The arrival. — Playing soldier. — The secret.— The promise. — Harry in danger. — Love and duty. — The promise kept. — " Saved, at the loss of my own honor ! " Act III. — Drawing-room at Falconer's. — Reading the news. — " Apply to Judy ! " — Louise's romance. — Important news. — Bertha's fears. — Leamington s arrival. — Drawing the web. — Threatened.— Plotting. — Harry and Bertha. — A fiendish lie. — Face to face.—" Do you know him ? " — Denounced. — " Your life shall be the penalty ! " — Startling tableau. Act IV. — At Uncle Toby's. — A wonderful climate. — An impudent rascal. — A bit of history. — Woman's wit. — Toby Indignant. — A quarrel. — Uncle Toby's evidence. — Leamington's last trump. — Good news. — Checkmated. — The telegram. — Breaking the web. — Sunshine at last. \iW Copits mailed, postpaid, to any address, oh receipt o/ the annexed prices. gr% SAVED FROM THE WRECK. A DRAMA IN THREE ACTS, BY THOMAS K. SERRANO. PRICE, 15 CENTS. Eight male, three female characters: Leading comedy, juvenile man, genteel villain, rough villain, lij^ht comedy, escaped convict, deteciive, utility, juvenile lady, leading comedy lady ;ind old woman. Tv^-o interior and one landscape scenes. Modern costumes. Time of playing, two hours and a half. The scene of the action is laid on the New Jersey coast. The plot is of absorbing interest, the "business" effective, and the ingenious contrasts of comic and serious situations present a con- tinuous series of surprises for the spectators, whose interest is increasingly maintained up to the final tableau. SYNOPSIS OF INCIDENTS. Act I. The Home of the Light-house Keeper. — An autumn afternoon. — The insult. — True to herself. — A fearless hejrt. —The unwelcome guest. — Only a foundling. — An abuse of confidence. — The new partner. — 1 he compact. — The dead brought to life. — Saved from the wreck. — Legal advice. — Matried for money.— A E'lden chance. — The intercepted letter. — A vision of wealth. — The forgery. — Within ail inch of his life. — The rescue. — Tableau. Act II. Scene as before; time, night. — Dark clouds gathering. — Changing the jackets. — Father and son. — On duty. — A struggle for fortune. — Loved for himself. — The divided greenbacks. — The agreement. — An unhappy life. — The detective's mis- take. — Arrested. — Mistaken identity. — The likeness again. — On the right track — The accident. — -"Will she be saved ? " — Latour's bravery. — A noble sacrifice. — The secret meeting. — Another case of mistaken identity. — The murder. — " Who did it ? " — The torn cuff. — " There stands the murderer!" — " 'Tis false!" — The wrong man mur- dered. — Who was the victim ? — Tableau. Act III. Two Days Later. — Plot and counterplot.— Gentleman and convict. — The price of her life. — Some new documents. — The divided banknotes. — Sunshine through the clouds. — Prepared for a watery grave — Deadly peril. — Fatherand daugh- ter. — The rising tide. — A life for a signature. — True unto death. — Saved. — The mys- tery solved. — Denouement. —Tableau. BETWEEN TWO FIRES. A COMEDY-DRAMA IN THREE ACTS, BY THOMAS K. SERRANO. PRICE, 15 CENTS. Eight male, three female, and utility characters: Leading juvenile man, first and second walking gentleman, two light comedians (lawyer and foreign adventurer), Dutch and Irish character comedians, villain, soldiers ; leading juvenile lady, walk- ing lady and comedienne. '1 hree interior scenes ; modern and military costumes. Time of playing, two hours and a half. Apart from unusual interest of plot and skill of construction, the play affords an opportunity of representing the progress of a real battle in the distance (though this is not necessary to the action). The comedy business is delicious, if well worked up, and a startling phase of the slavery question is sprung upon the audience in the last act. SYNOPSIS OF INCIDENTS. Act I. At Fort Lee, on the Hudson. — News from the war. — The meeting. — The colonel's strange romance. — Departing for the war. — The intrusted packet. — An honest man. — A last request. — Bitter hatred. — The dawn of love. — A northerner's sympathy for the South. — Is he a traitor ? — Held in trust. — La Creole mine for sale. — Financial agents. — A brother's wrong. — An order to cross the enemy's lines. — For- tune's fool. — Love's penalty. — Man's independence. — Strange disclosures. — A sha- dowed life. — Beggareci in pocket, and bankrupt in love. — His last chance. — The re- fusal. — Turned from home. — Alone, without a name — Off to the war. — Tableau. Act II. On the Battlefield. — An Irishman's philosophy. — Unconscious of danger. — Spies in the camp. — The insult. — Risen from the ranks. — The colonel's prej- udice. — Letters from home. — The plot to ruin. — A token of love. — True to him. — The plotters at work. — Breaking the seals. — The meeting of husband and wife. — A forlorn hope. — Doomed as a spy. — A struggle for lost honor. — A soldier's death. — Tableau. Act III. Before Richmond. — The home of Mrs. De Mori. — The two docu- ments. — A little misunderstanding. — A deserted wife. — The truth revealed. — Brought to light. — Mother and child. — Rowena's sacrifice. — The American Eagle spreads his wings. — The spider's web. — True to himself. — The reconciliation. — A long divided home reunited. — The close of the war. — Tableau. ^^WCoJiies mailed^ postpaid^ to any address.^ on receipt of the annexed prices. , ^ bS BY FORCE OF IMPULSE. A DRAMA II< KIVE ACT3, BY H. V. VOGT. Pric e, 15 C ents. Nine male, three female characters, vi..: Leading and Second Juvenile Men, Vld Man. S.n eel Villain. Walking Gentleman. First and Second L.ght Comed.ans Heavy Chamcter, Low Comedian, Leading and Second Juvenxle Lad.es and Comic Old Maid. Time of playing. Two hours and a half. SYNOPSIS OF EVENTS. Act I. Love vs. Impulse.— DoUer- clutch's office.— A fruitless journey, a heap of accumulated business and a chapter of unparalleled impudence.— News from the front.— A poor girl s trouble and a lawyer's big heart.— tlil- da'9 sad story.-" I '11 see this thing through if It costs me a fortune I —A sudden departure in search ot a clue — Themeetingof friends.— Oneof nature s noblemen.-Maitland betra:^ his secret by a slip of the tongue.— The ball at Beachwood.— Two spooneys.fresh from coUeee.lose their heads and their hearts. ^"Squashed, by Jupiter! -—Trusting innocence and poHshed villainy.— 1 he interrupted trvst. — An honest mans avowal.— A picture of charming simpli- eity.— Murdell and Hilda meet face to ■lace.— "I dare you to make another victim !"— A scoundrel's discomfiture.— Tableau. _, .. ., ActIL The Separation.— The Mait- fand homestead.— Anastasia's doubts.— A warm welcome and its icy reception. ^Forebodings and doubts.— Father and son.— Searching questions.- A doniestic storm and a parent's command.— A foiled villain's wrath.— Enlisting for the war— The collapse of the cowards.- " It 's no use, 'Dolphy. the jig 's up ! — Hilda's sympathy and Adrienne s silent despair.— The result of impulse.— 1 lie father pleads for his son.— Anastasia and DoUerclutch.— Coriolanus comes to Erief.— Good and bad news.— Husband and wife.— Reginald demands an ex- planation.— A hand without a heart,— The separation.— A new recruit— loo late; the roll is signed.- Tableau. Act III. Duty vs. Impulse.— Four Years later.— A camp in the army.— Longings. — "Only six miles ^rom home !'*^The skeleton in the closet.— A father's yearning for his child.— A woman-hater in love.— Dojlerclutch s dream.— A picture of camp life and fun. —Coriolanus has his revenge.— News from home.— Bollerclutch makes a big find. " Eureka ! "—Proofs of Hild.-i s parentage and marriage.— A happy old ^ a.A« mailed, post-paid, to any address on receipt of the advertised price. lawyer.— "I 'U take them to Hilda! — Detailed for duty.— A soldier's tempta- lion.— The sentinel deserts his post.— The snake in the grass.— "At last, I can humble his pride !" Act IV. The Reconciliation and Sequel.— At Reginald's home.— News from the army.—" Grant is not the man to acknowledge defeat !"— Adrienne and Hilda.— False pride is broken.- 1 he re- conciliation.— " Will Reginald forgive n,e?"_Dollerclutch brings loy to Hil- da's heart.— "You are the daughter ot Morris Maitland !"— The stolen docu- ments and the snake in the grass.— "Hang me if I don't see this thing through !"— A letter to the absent one.— Face to face.— The barrier of pride swept down.— "Reginald. I love you; come back !"-The happy reunion. -An ominous cloud.— "I have deserted my post ; the penalty is death. I must re- turn ere my absence is discovered 1 — The wolf in the sheepfold.— A wily tempter foiled. — A villain's rage. — "Those words have sealed your doom ! — The murder and the escape.— DoUerclutch arrives too late.— The pur- suit. _ Act V. Divine Impulse.— in canip. — Maitland on duty.— The charge of de- sertion and the examination.— "I knew not what I did !"— The colonel s lenity.— Disgrace.- News of Adrienne's murder is brought to camp.— Circumstantial evidence fastens the murder upon Reg- inald.— The court-martial.— Convicted and sentenced to be shot.— Preparations for the execution.— • God knows I am innocent ! "—DoUerclutch arrives in the nick of time.— "If you shoot that man you commit murder 1"— The beginning of the end.— "Adrienne hves! —A -.u- lain's terror.— Adrienne appears on the scene.— "There is the attempted assas- sin !"— Divine impulse.- The reward of innocence and the punishment of vil- lainy.— Good news.—" Hurrah, the wa' is over; Lee has surrendered to Grant! The happy denouement andjinale.- • Tableau. HAROLD ROORBACH, Publistier, <» MURRAY ST., NEW YORK. NEW ENTERTAINMENTS. THE JAPANESE WEDDING. A C'^^tume pantomime repre^ciitalion of the Wedding Ceremony in Japanese high life. I'he company consists of the bride and groom, their parents, six bridesmaids, and the officiating personage appropriately called the " Go-between." There are various lormalities, including salaams, lea-drinking, eating rice-cakes, and giving presents. No words are spoken. The ceremony (which occupies about 50 minutes), with the "tea-room," fills out an evening well, though music and other attractions m.Ty be added. Can be represented by young ladie^ alone, if preferred. Price, 2j Cents. AN EVENING WITH PICKWICK. A Literary and Dramatic Dickens Entertainment. — Introduces the Pickwick Club, the Wardles of Dingley Dell, the Fat l!oy, Alfred Jingle, Mrs. Leo Hunter, Lord Mutanhed and Count .Smorltork, Arabe'la Allen and I!ob Allen, Hob Sawyer, Mrs. and Master Hardell, Mrs. Chippins. Mrs. U'eller, Stiggins, Tony WelL-r, Sam AVeller, and the Lady Traveller. Price, 25 cents. AN EVENING WITH COPPERFIELD. A Literary and Dramatic Dickens Entertainment. — Litroduces Mrs. Copperfield, Davie, the Peggotys, the Murdstones, Mrs. Gummidge, Little Eni'ly, Barkis, l!etsey Trotwood, Mr. Dick and his kite, Steerforth, the Creakles, Traddles, Rosa Dartle, Miss Mowcher, Uriah Heep and his Mother, the Micawbers, Dora and Gyp, and the woiden-legged Gatekeeper. Price, 25 cents. These " Evenings with Dickens " can be represented in whole or in part, require but little memorizing, do not demand experienced actors, are not troublesome to pre- pare, and are suitable for performance either on the platform or in the drawing room. THE GYPSIES' FESTIVAL. A Musical Entertainment for Voung People. Litroduces the Gypsy Queen, Fortune Teller, Yankee Peddler, and a Chorus of Gypsies, of any desired number. The scene is supposed to be a Gypsy Camp. The costumes are very pretty, but simple ; the dialogue bright ; the music easy and tuneful ; and the drill movements and calisthenics are graceful. Few properties and no set scenery required, so that the entertainment can be represented on any platform. Price, 25 cents. THE COURT OF KING CHRISTMAS. A CHRISTMAS ENTERTAINMENT. The action takes place in Santa Clans land on Christmas eve, and represents the bustling preparations of St. Nick and his attendant worthies for the gratification of all children the next day. The cast may include as many as 36 characters, though fewer will answer, and the enter- tainment represented on a platform, without troublesome properties. The co.s- tumes are simple, the incidental music and drill movements graceful and easily managed, the dialogue uncommonly good, and the Avhole thing (jnite above the average. A representation of this entertainment will cause the young folks, from six to sixty, fairly to turn themselves inside out with delight, and, at the same time, enforce the important moral of Peace and Good \\'ill. Price, 25 cents. RECEyTLV PUBLISHED. ILLUSTRATED TABLEAUX FOR AMATEURS. A new scries of TabUaux / '/r'a>/i'j, by M.'VRTHA C. W ELD. In this series each description is accompanied with a full-page illustration of the scene to be represented. PART I.— MISCELLANEOUS TABLEAUX.— Contains Gener.al Introduction, 12 Tableaux and 14 Illustrations. Price, 25 Cents. PART IL— MISCELLANEOUS TABLEAU.X;.— Contains Introduction, 12 Ta- bleaux and 12 illustrations. Price, 25 Cents. SAVED FROM THE WRECK. A drama in three acts. Eight male, three female characters. Time, two hours and a half. Price, 15 Cents. BETWEEN TWO FIRES. A comedy-drama in three acts. Eight male, three female characters. Time, two hours and a half. Price, 15 Cents. BY FORCE OF IMPULSE. A drama in five acts. Nine male, three female characters. Time, two hours and a half. Price, 15 Cents. A LESSON IN ELEGANCE. A comedy in one act. Four female characters. Time, thirty minutes. Price, 15 Cents. WANTED, A CONFIDENTIAL CLERK. A farce in one act. Six male characters. Time, thirty minutes. Price, 15 Cents. SECOND SIGHT. A farcical comedy in one act. Four male, one female charac- ter. Time, one hour. Price, 15 Cents. THE TRIPLE WEDDING. A drama in three acts. Four male, four female characters. Time, one hour and a quarter. Price, 15 cents. t^ A Hy 0/ the above ivill be sent by mail., postpaid., to any addressy on receipt f/ the annexed prices, ,^^^ HAROLD RO.ORBACH, Publisher, 9 Murray St„ New York. LIBRARY OF CONGRESS H ELMER ACTOR'S MAKE-l ' A rra-ctUrJ .xn.i rysiematic CiiiJe to iht Art """'■""g'^'^' ^igg 57g g PRICE, 25 CENTS. With exhaustive treatment on the Use of Theatrical Wrr.s AND Beards, The Make-up and its requisite materials, the diffkrent features and their management. Typical Character Masks, etc. With Special Hints to Ladies. Designed for the use of Actors and Amateurs, and for both Ladies and Gentle- men. Copiously Illustrated. CONTENTS. \. Theatrical Wigs. — The Style and Form of Theatrical Wigs and Beards. The Color and Shading of Theatrical Wigs and Beards. Directions for Measuring the Head. To put on a Wig properly. n. Theatrical Beards. — How to fashion a Beard out of crep6 hair. How to make Beards of Wool. The growth of Beard simu- lated. \\\. The Make-up — A successful Character Mask, and how to make it. Perspiration during performance, how removed. IV. The Make-up Box.— Grease Paints. Grease paintc in sticks ; Flesh Cream ; Face Powder; How to use face powder as a liquid cream ; The various shades of face powder. Water Cos- jndtique. Nose Putty. Court Plaster. Cocoa Butter. Crgp6 Hair and Prepared Wool. Grenadine. Dorin's Rouge. "Old Man's" Rouge. "Juvenile" Rouge, Spirit Gum. Email Noir. Bear's Grease. Eyebrow Pencils. Artist's Stomps. Powder Puffs. Hares* Teet. Camels'-hair Brushes. V. The Features and their Treatment. — The Eyes : blind- ness. The Eyelids. The Eyebrows : How to paint out an eyebrow or moustache ; II ow to paste on eyebrows ; How to regulate bushy eye- brows. The Eyelashes : To alter the appearance of the eyes. The Ears. The Nose : A Roman nose ; How to use the nose putty ; A pug nose ; An African nose ; a large nose apparentlyreduced in size. The Mouth and Lips : a juvenile mouth ; an old mouth ; a sensuous mouth ; a satirical mouth ; a one-sided mouth ; a merry mouth ; A sullen mouth. The Teeth. The Neck, Arms, Hands and Finger- nails : Fingernails lengthened. Wrinkles: Friendliness and Sullen- ness indicated by wrinkles. Shading. A Starving character, A Cut in the Face. A Thin Face Made Fleshy. VI. Typical Character Masks. — The Make-up for Youth : Dimpled cheeks. Manhood. Middle Age. Making up as a Drunk- ard : One method ; another method. Old Age. Negroes. Moors. Chinese. King Lear, Shylock. Macbeth. Richelieu. Statuary. Clowns. VII. Special Hints to Ladies. — The Make-up. Theatrical Wigs and Hair Goods. Sent hy mail, postpaid, to any address, on 7-cccipt ofthepruc. HAROLD ROORBACH, Publisher, 9 Murray Street, Kew York.