A HAND-BOOK OF GOLF 
 FOR B C A R S 
 
 BT FRANK VER BECK 
 
 VITH NOTES BT HAYDEN CARRinii.MrE 
 
LIBRARY OF CONGRESS. 
 
 Chap. Copyiiglit No. 
 
 Shelf. 
 
 UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. 
 
A HAND-BOOK OF GOLF 
 FOR BEARS 
 
A Hand-book of Golf 
 for Bears 
 
 BY 
 
 FRANK VERBECK 
 
 VERSES BY 
 
 HAYDEN CARRUTH 
 
 NEW YORK 
 
 R. H. RUSSELL, Publisher 
 
 1900 
 
44391 
 
 
 "\W'J C.DftEb KtCtiKED 
 
 SEP 7 1900 
 
 Cepjright wtry 
 
 StCONn COPY. 
 
 .£)c"ve!ixt ts 
 
 0«Otrt DIVISION, 
 
 L_0G1_18_I900 
 Copyright, 1900, by 
 
 ROBERT HOWARD RUSSELL 
 
LrfC. 
 
;; 
 
 is the Artist, 
 
 Who golf never 
 
 played ; 
 Ditto the Author- 
 
 But neither's afraid. 
 
n 
 
 is the Bear, 
 Who calls caddy 
 
 a ninny, 
 And remarks that this golf 
 Is just old-fashioned 
 
 shinny. 
 
2 
 
 is the Caddy, 
 
 Who says, "If of 
 
 yore 
 
 This was shinny, you bet 
 
 I don't want any more ! 
 
 '^-'^^^ 
 
is the Drive, 
 
 That is driven so 
 
 high, 
 And surprises them all 
 As it sails through the 
 
 ^;**N»,-^fc^^ 
 
/; 
 
 3 
 
 is the Enemy, 
 Lurking quite 
 
 nigh, 
 Who gobbles the drive 
 
 That is driven so high. 
 
2 
 
 is the Fellow 
 
 Who drops in to 
 
 call, 
 And thinks that the game 
 Is played just like base- 
 
2 
 
 is the Grandma 
 
 Who also comes 
 
 by, 
 
 And knocks the ball flying 
 The very first shy. 
 
•;; 
 
 is the Hayseed, 
 Who says " I've 
 
 heerd tell 
 
 Of your golf, I'll just try 
 
 My old cotton umbrell. 
 
 99 
 
's the Intruder, 
 Who raises old Ned, 
 
 'Cause a hard-driven ball. 
 Makes a bump on his 
 
 head. 
 
J 
 
is the Joke, 
 
 As you readily 
 
 see. 
 
 When he strikes up the ball 
 To a hole in the tree. 
 
 ^ 
 
/; 
 
 is the Kick, 
 
 Which soon fol- 
 
 lows the same. 
 
 Says Caddy, "this thing 
 
 Is a regular shame. 
 
 »» 
 
is the Lightning, 
 Which hayseed 
 
 thinks hits him 
 As down on the ground 
 He quite suddenly sits 
 
/; 
 
 is for Muscle, 
 Of which fatty 
 
 has piles, 
 Says he, "I'll just knock it, 
 A couple o' miles." 
 
 .2^,. 
 
 li^ 
 
i^ 
 
 3 
 
 stands for Nothing, 
 Which tells the 
 whole story 
 Of fatty's attempt 
 
 To achieve golfing 
 
/; 
 
 's an Outsider, 
 
 Who wasn't ex 
 
 pected, 
 But now that he's here 
 
 He isn't neglected. 
 
^ 
 
 »? 
 
 2 
 
 f^ 's his amazing 
 
 Jackassical Play. 
 And the ball? Why it 
 didn't 
 Come down till next 
 
rp} 
 
 is the Quarrel, 
 Which we greatly 
 deplore, 
 But they'll happen some- 
 times 
 When discussing the 
 
2 
 
 is the Rasping 
 And Riddling 
 
 Rub, 
 The damaging, dreadful 
 And dastardly drub. 
 
is the Stream 
 
 Where the ball 
 
 disappears, 
 Which instantly raises 
 
 The players' worst fears. 
 
T 
 
 is the Turtle 
 
 Who passes it 
 
 out, 
 
 While Caddy lets ofF 
 A hilarious shout. 
 
/; 
 
 is the Urchin, 
 
 Run off for the 
 
 day, 
 
 Who asks forty questions, 
 And gets in the way. 
 
is the Valor, 
 
 Displayed by them 
 all, 
 
 When the silly old goose 
 
 Tries to hatch out the 
 
 ^ 
 
/; 
 
 is the Weasel, 
 Who comes 
 
 from the ground 
 And says, "Bet a cent 
 There are fat geese 
 around." 
 
 >Liy 
 
the X-citement, 
 
 As the wild 
 
 bear they see; 
 Poor wild bear, he knows 
 
 Not a hole from a tree. 
 
 
 f^^^^f^ 
 
is the Yowl 
 Of the wildcat 
 
 so shrill. 
 Says Caddy, "I wish those 
 Wild beasts would keep 
 still ! " 
 
2 
 
 is the Zigzag, 
 Which serves 
 well to scare 'em 
 
 When sporty bear comes 
 And attempts a wild 
 
r;j 
 
 Here came the 
 bulldog, 
 
 Of mighty low breed, 
 He growled and he howled 
 And these golfers he 
 treed. 
 
 i^4^ 
 
^fiiJ.A" ijv.v;;^;; 
 
 
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 iiiii iVii^iii, '-"'EGRESS 
 
 020 237 329 A