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SHETLAND. 
 AND THE SHETLANDERS; 
 
 1) 
 
 2Ci)e Norti)etn (Itfccuit. 
 
 y 
 
 By CATHERINE SINCLAIR, 
 
 Author of "Modern Accomplishments," "Modern Society," "Ilill and 
 Valley," "Charlie Seymour," "Holiday House," &c. &c. 
 
 O Scotland! nurse of bravest men, 
 But nurse of bad men too ! 
 For thee the good attempt in vain, 
 What villains still undo ! 
 
 Robertson op Struan. 
 
 DEDICATED TO THE HIGHLAND SOCIETY. 
 
 <f 
 
 N E VV . Y O R K : 
 
 D. APPLETON & CO., 200 BROADWAY. 
 
 1840. 
 
UNIVERSITY PRESS. 
 JOHN F. TROW, PRINTER, 114 NASSAU-STREET. 
 
 
PREFACE. 
 
 The author ha\dng in a previous volume ventured 
 forward with some apprehension, she has been so 
 agreeably surprised by the success of her first shot, 
 in bringing down a large covey of readers, that she 
 feels encouraged now to discharge a second barrel, 
 trusting it may not be said that she has overshot 
 the mark. 
 
 The more deeply grateful the author feels to 
 those who have candidly, and only partially viewed 
 her present attempt to throw some additional light 
 and interest on the localities of Scotland, the more 
 solicitous she is, not to draw too largely on their 
 forbearance, or to intrude too frequently on their 
 attention ; she now therefore concludes this work, 
 hoping that the very indulgent public may long 
 continue 
 
 " To all its faults a little blind." 
 
SHETLAND 
 AND THE SHETLANDERS 
 
 DORNOCH. 
 
 TO A SCOTCH COUSIN. 
 
 I've often wished that I had clear, 
 For life six hundred pounds a-year, 
 A handsome house to lodge a friend, 
 A river at my garden's end, 
 A terrace- walk, and half a rood 
 Of land, set out to plant a wood: 
 
 Pope, 
 
 My dear Cousin, — When students are about to 
 leave Oxford, a list is given in of the books to 
 which their attention has been chiefly devoted, and 
 they are examined by a learned jury on the progress 
 and depth of their attainments. If we were all 
 obliged occasionally to render up before competent 
 examiners such an account of our time, it would be 
 amusing, in most cases, to see the miscellaneous list 
 of favourite authors presented ! Instead of Homer, 
 
b DORNOCH. 
 
 Cicero, and Herodotus, how often we should find 
 " Trollope, Dickens, and Hook," or perhaps " Byron, 
 Scott, and the Newgate Calendar," but of late your 
 more abstruse studies have been seriously impeded 
 by the incessant battledore and shuttlecock of our 
 correspondence, and the Post-office must wonder 
 what can be going on in the North, seeing so con- 
 stant a succession of letters pouring in upon you, 
 their seals strained almost to bursting, like the lock 
 of a trunk on a jom'ney. 
 
 We are credibly informed, that the Empress 
 Josephine wore thirty new bonnets in a month ; and 
 really those who travel through the wind and rain 
 of this changeable summer would require to follow 
 the example, or to wear theirs of cast-iron. Mr. 
 M'Intosh ought to receive a petition from the ladies, 
 to invent something becoming for us to wear during 
 rain, as he certainly has sacrificed the ornamental 
 to the useful in respect to gentlemen, who are much 
 to be pitied for the sort of hideous domino they all 
 wear in a shower, though they might be envied also 
 for the impunity with which they can brave the 
 
 worst now. I often think A would rather have 
 
 a torrent of rain than otherwise, to prove how im- 
 pregnable, amidst the war of elements, are his for- 
 tifications. 
 
 We had a delightful clearing-up towards eve- 
 ning for inspecting the neat little county town of 
 
DORNOCH. 7 
 
 Dornoch, where I greatly admired the magnificent 
 donation of a fine cathedral presented to the city 
 some years ago, by the Duchess-Countess of Suther- 
 land, who expended .£6000 in renewing an ancient 
 ecclesiastical edifice which stood here, dedicated to 
 St. Gilbert, a saint with whom I was not previously 
 acquainted. The former building had been burned, 
 along with a large proportion of the town, by an 
 invading army, but her Grace caused the old pro- 
 portions and very elaborate decorations to be copied 
 with almost Chinese minuteness, and now it wants 
 only a few centuries of antiquity to be quite venera- 
 ble. 
 
 After this renewal had been successfully com- 
 pleted, the Duchess only once enjoyed the gratifica- 
 tion of attending public worship in that house of 
 God, where she now lies interred beneath a wooden 
 trap-door in front of the altar. There also sleeps 
 the Duke her husband, to whom the county of Suth- 
 erland owed, and has testified, almost unbounded 
 respect and gratitude. On the summit of a neigh- 
 bouring hill, a pillar, sixty feet high, surmounted by 
 a colossal statue, may be seen for thirty miles round, 
 " known to every star and every wind that blows." 
 It was raised by the personal labour and subscrip- 
 tions of his own attached tenantry to the memory of 
 this nobleman, originally a stranger to our heath- 
 covered mountains, who became so completely a 
 
8 DORNOCH. 
 
 Scotchman by adoption, that he spent the whole 
 income of his Highland estates in improving them, 
 resided much in that remote district, associated cor- 
 dially with his tenantry, and chose his dukedom to 
 perpetuate his connection with this country and with 
 the ancient Earldom of Sutherland, the oldest title 
 in Britain. 
 
 The Duke's death was supposed to have been 
 hastened by the cold and fatigue of a steam voyage 
 to Scotland ; and the Duchess, who sm-vived him 
 five years, gave directions, on her death-bed, with 
 singular forethought, that her body should be con- 
 veyed to Dornoch by sea, but that any of her family 
 who were to be present at the funeral should avoid 
 the danger of a winter voyage, and follow by land. 
 
 Few persons have enjoyed a more remarkably 
 prosperous life than the Duchess-Countess of Suther- 
 land, gifted from her earliest youth with an eminent 
 share of beauty, talents, and fortune, which she lived 
 to enjoy, almost unimpaired, during a long course 
 of years. 
 
 It is well known that when Lord Trentham was 
 jilted by the beautiful but fickle Lady Caroline 
 Spencer, some friend reported to hiin that the young 
 heiress of Dunrobin had expressed astonishment how 
 any lady could refuse one so deserving of happiness. 
 Upon hearing this, he instantly declared that she 
 could more than compensate for his recent disap- 
 
DORNOCH. 9 
 
 pointraent, — the result of which eclaircissement was, 
 an aUiance most propitious to the best interests of 
 Scotland, 
 
 The Duchess-Countess, when about to b# snatch- 
 ed from all that this world could bestow, testified 
 astonishing composure while she contemplated the 
 immediate approach of death. When alluding to 
 the prospect of her own impending dissolution, she 
 said, " It is quite as well now as afterwards ;" and 
 when advised to postpone some important business, 
 she repUed, "There is no time for me but the 
 present." 
 
 No subject excites such deep interest in every 
 human breast, as to ascertain how that last enemy- 
 has been met by others, which must sooner or later 
 conquer ourselves ! It often seems to me, that du- 
 ring life, we are placed between two impenetrable 
 curtains, the one hiding from our sight all that is 
 past, the other all that is future ; but a death-bed 
 throws both, as it were, aside, — the door stands a-jar 
 leading into another world, — and we then see at 
 once, in solemn an'ay, all the follies of our former 
 existence, and all the terrors of a future judgment, 
 which often so fearfully awaken those agonies of 
 conscience that beset the mind of a dying sinner. 
 Sir Henry Halford, who attended the final hours of 
 many an eminent individual, has recorded his own 
 surprise how many have no reluctance to die, — some 
 
10 DORNOCH. 
 
 from impatience of suffering, others from passive in- 
 difference, but many from faith in our holy reUgion. 
 " Such men," he adds, " were not only calm and 
 support^, but cheerful, in the hour of death, and I 
 never quitted such a sick-chamber, without a hope 
 that my last end might be like theirs." It is very 
 remarkable to observe, how little our love of life is 
 proportioned to the external prosperity we enjoy in 
 it, and that whenever we fancy any individual hav- 
 ing more than a common share of happiness, he is 
 always some one of whom we know nothing, or 
 very little. You have heard of the poor bed-ridden 
 old beggar, who clasped his hands in an agony of 
 grief when told he was dying, and exclaimed, " Oh, 
 this is a pleasant world !" and you have seen others, 
 with scarcely a want unsupplied, who seemed 
 weary of their very existence, and endured it only 
 from a di'ead of futurity. Baxter said, he was all 
 his life tempted sinfully to wish that he had never 
 been born ; and those who have attained the most 
 that this world can offer, have greatest leisure to 
 look around on the barrenness of the prospect, while 
 they might be apt to exclaim, like Caesar, when he 
 gained his empire, " Is this all !" A peaceful con- 
 science, that blessing which all might enjoy, who 
 rightly seek and value it, is the only support which 
 will avail in the end, and some Christians have at- 
 tained that holy faith which encouraged them to 
 
DORNOCH. 1 1 
 
 feel a clam serene expectation, that when the veil 
 was drawn back which hides eternity from our 
 sight, they were immediately to behold the glories 
 of Heaven. Yet how carefully must we discriminate 
 between a resigned death, and a prepared death. 
 Those who are most eagerly seeking the world's 
 honours, pleasures, and applause, would scarcely be 
 ready to acknowledge the wisdom of that last wash 
 expressed by the unfortunate Princess Caroline Ma- 
 tilda, who scratched these words with a diamond on 
 the window of her prison — " Oh ! make me inno- 
 cent — be others great!" Every living person is 
 born with desires which the world, and all it con- 
 tains, never can satisfy ; and though all the gifts of 
 fortune accumulated around us, were conspiring to 
 hide our Maker from our thoughts, we could not but 
 feel that there are higher pleasures, and greater 
 gifts, than any upon earth, which we are created to 
 seek, and without which we can reach no happiness 
 that deserves the name. It is astonishing how 
 many persons never pause, in the hurry of life, to 
 ask themselves in what their enjoyments consist, 
 and to what they tend, — ^who live in mere vague 
 sensations of either pleasure or pain, without ascer- 
 taining whether they acquire all the best and rich- 
 est blessings which might be procured. If we are 
 merely receiving change for a note, what a cautious 
 examination is made whether the full amount be 
 
12 DORNOCH. 
 
 paid, and how carefully do we avoid being cheated 
 of the smallest fraction, yet how indifferent we are 
 whether the joys and hopes on which we spend our 
 lives be genuine, and whether they be such as will 
 certainly pass current in that future world to which 
 we all are hastening ! 
 
 As riches and honours, then, neither increase the 
 love of life, nor diminish the awfulness of death, 
 we can scarcely form too low an estimate of their 
 intrinsic worth. When rightly used, however, not 
 as the end, but as the means of enjoyment, they add 
 so much to the usefulness and the inJfluence of those 
 who desire to promote the glory of God, and the 
 good of mankind, that they surely become legitimate 
 objects of pursuit, though we read that Martin Lu- 
 ther, in his last will and testament, returned special 
 thanks to God that he had been born poor, and pos- 
 sessed " neither house, land, nor money to leave 
 behind." 
 
 The Cathedral of Dornoch has been built, unfor- 
 tunately, with so loud an echo inside, that part of 
 the congregation hear the sound only, but not the 
 sense, of what may be said ; and frequently, in fine 
 weather, Mr. Kennedy prefers preaching in the open 
 air. Even when talking to each other, we seemed 
 to hear double, but much might be amended by 
 hanging up curtains and draperies to deaden the re- 
 verberation. Nothing is so little understood in 
 
GOLSPIE. 13 
 
 architecture as the building of sacred edifices to suit 
 the voice ; but it would be a useful invention if 
 churches could be built so that only good sermons 
 should be audible. 
 
 The Duke and Duchess of Sutherland establish- 
 ed, round the whole of their vast domains, a line of 
 first-rate inns, each displaying for its frontispiece 
 their own crest, the cat rampant, certainly, next to 
 Whittington's, the most fortunate cat in the world. 
 It was alleged formerly to be a curious peculiarity 
 of this country, recorded by Sir Robert Gordon, that 
 " ther is not a ratt in Sutherland ; and if they doe 
 come thither in shipps from other pairts, which 
 often happeneth, they die presentlie, how soon they 
 doe smell the aire of that cuntrey ; but there is great 
 store and abundance of them in Catheynes, the verie 
 nixt adjacent province." Some of that very pecu- 
 liar " aire" should be imported to London for the 
 House of Commons. One of the best hotels in Scot- 
 land may be found at this charming village of Gol- 
 spie, situated close to a fine trouting stream, and 
 near the noble park of Dunrobin, which is liberally 
 opened for a public promenade. Mrs. Duncan, the 
 landlady here, is sister to two clergymen, and a most 
 pious, excellent person herself, moderate in her 
 charges, and so cordial in her reception of guests, 
 that it seems like visiting some kind old aunt or 
 grandmother to arrive at the door. She hurried up 
 2 
 
14 GOLSPIE. 
 
 to US immediately with a most liberal presentation 
 of wine and shortbread, that we might be " eating 
 while we ordered dinner !" Our hostess spoke with 
 tears of the late Duchess, who often stopped her 
 carriage when passing the inn, to ascertain what 
 travellers had lately been there ; and the good land- 
 lady is gifted with the faculty most useful in her 
 line, in which none but the Royal Family could ex- 
 cel her, of never forgetting any person. Mrs. Dun- 
 can had been completely perplexed by one guest, 
 however, last time I was here, who arrived at Golspie 
 in the mail, intending to pass on, but attracted by 
 the splendid scenery and excellent fare, he ordered 
 his baggage to be dismounted, and declared his in- 
 tention to remain there all night. Day after day 
 passed on, week after week elapsed, and still the 
 gentleman occupied her best parlour, and lingered 
 on, entranced by new beauties in the landscape, till 
 the summer had passed entirely away. No name 
 appeared on his portmanteau, and he neither receiv- 
 ed letters, nor cultivated acquaintances ! The whole 
 inn got into an uproar of curiosity about this inter- 
 esting incognito ! According to all the rules of ro- 
 mance, he ought to have been handsome, but conceive 
 my disappointment at seeing a middle-aged, respect- 
 able looking man, in a brown bob-wig ! Even Mrs. 
 Duncan seemed quite mortified, that he was neither 
 a disguised Prince, nor a swindler, all the silver 
 
DUNROBIN CASTLE. 15 
 
 spoons remained in their places, and at last he paid 
 his bill in quite a matter-of-fact way, put his trunk 
 on the mail again, and exit on the top of the coach ! 
 
 Mrs. Duncan's reminiscences of former guests 
 are more disinterested than those of your old land- 
 lady at Brighton, who estimated travellers by the 
 length of bill they incurred, saying, "He was an 
 excellent man, — always posted with four horses, 
 ordered his bottle of sherry for dinner, and seldom 
 went to bed without a hot supper at night !" 
 
 I never felt a sensation so like being in a bal- 
 loon as when gazing from the drawing-room win- 
 dow of Dunrobin Castle, perched like an eagle's 
 aerie on the summit of a lofty rock, and looking 
 down on the waving tops of the trees, the ocean 
 furrowed with streaks of foam, and the far distant 
 prospect of Tarbetness, with its beacon-light 
 
 "Streaming comfort o'er the troubled deep." 
 
 A long hne of points and pinnacles terminates at 
 Trouphead, and if you can look on the whole view 
 without an ecstasy of admiration, shut your eyes 
 on nature for ever after, as you are unworthy to 
 behold her. The park, though not highly dressed 
 or ornamented, has the beauty of great extent, and 
 is abundantly wooded to the edge of the wide and 
 intensely blue ocean. Every tree so exposed to the 
 wild northern blast must have a precarious existence, 
 
16 DUNROBIN CASTLE. 
 
 and those planted nearest the ocean generally perish 
 on a forlorn hope ; but no species can brave the sea- 
 breeze half so hardily as the Huntingdon willow, 
 which has outgrown all its coteraporaries at least 
 twelve feet in height, and is covered with abundant 
 foliage, though all shaped like flags, with a bare 
 pole next the sea, and the long branches fluttering 
 and streaming towards the land. 
 
 The enormously fat housekeeper, well-known at 
 Dunrobin, was absent to-day, but we found a thin- 
 ner one who answered our purpose equally well in 
 displaying the house, which is considered to be the 
 oldest inhabited residence in Britain. Do you re- 
 member a conundrum with which a friend of ours 
 once astonished the stately and dignified Duchess- 
 Countess of Sutherland, " "Why is the proprietor of 
 this place, like a thief on the gallows ? Because 
 he has Done-robbing !" The date is 1100, and the 
 name is of Gaelic derivation, signifying " the hill of 
 Robert," after Robert Earl of Sutherland, who built 
 it. In the court of this castle is one of the deepest 
 draw wells in Scotland, but we must hope that truth 
 does not lie at the bottom of it. 
 
 This remote old castle used to be filled, not many 
 years ago, with company as distinguished for rank 
 and consequence as the guests at Windsor Palace. 
 The first society in England was attracted by the 
 Duchess, who lived there like a feudal Princess, en- 
 
DUNROBIN CASTLE. 17 
 
 tertaining often thirty guests at dinner, and lodging 
 sixty servants in the house. Since her lamented 
 decease, a pall of mourning is spread over the whole 
 county, and this venerable castle seemed to me now 
 like an old friend in adversity, as I wandered through 
 its desolate halls, remembering the last time I dined 
 here, when " the free and independent electors of 
 Sutherlandshire" were entertained at table, and her 
 Grace's two pipers effectually drowned all political 
 discussions, by performing pibrochs alternately, 
 equipped, the one in the Sutherland tartan, the other 
 in that of Lord Reay's country, which her Grace 
 had recently added to her vast possessions. Even 
 many of the old ancestors are vanished from Dun- 
 robin, having gone to London to be refreshed and 
 beautified, though copies of several still decorate the 
 steward's room ; and I could not but fancy, in look- 
 ing at the Duchess-Countess's mother, and her aunt, 
 the good Lady Glenorchy, that, hanging where they 
 do, they must lend their countenance occasionally 
 to scenes and conversation rather unsuitable to their 
 dignity. My grandmother, Lady Janet Sutherland's 
 portrait appears there in the character of a little 
 smiling old-fashioned infant, certainly rather formal, 
 with a cherry in her hand, looking very imlike the 
 venerable character she afterwards became, when, 
 such was the reverence felt for her in Caithness, that 
 a clergyman hearing she was to preside at an 
 2* 
 
18 DUNROBIN CASTLE. 
 
 Edinburgh assembly, directed his letter to her as 
 " Moderator of the General Assembly, Edinburgh !" 
 Her nephew, the last Earl of Sutherland's likeness, 
 in full Highland garb, is to be seen on the staircase. 
 Judging from that, and the other portraits of him in 
 various splendid costumes, which decorate different 
 apartments, he must have had a very interesting ap- 
 pearance, and his Countess has so animated and 
 speaking an expression, that her mere picture en- 
 livens the room, and she must have been a delightful 
 companion. She and her husband having both died 
 young, within sixteen days of each other, were buried 
 in one grave at Holyrood Chapel, and the Duchess- 
 Countess raised a monument to the memory of her 
 parents in Dornoch Cathedral. It consists of two 
 marble pillars, each surmounted by an urn, and 
 crowned with a coronet. This inscription is carved 
 underneath — " They were lovely and pleasant in 
 their lives, and in their death they were not divided." 
 
 A dismal likeness is here, representing the Duke 
 of Richmond, who never laid aside his mournino- 
 after the execution of Charles I. ; and we admired 
 an interesting picture of Lady Glenorchy in her 
 childhood, teaching music to an orphan girl whom 
 she educated ; an early indication of that active be- 
 nevolent usefulness, for which, in more essential 
 things, she became afterwards so distinguished. 
 
 The Marquis of Hastings, and a gay party of 
 
DUNROBIN CASTLE. 19 
 
 visiters at Dunrobin, once secured the whole mail 
 at Golspie, and wheeled themselves round to Thurso, 
 where they hired post horses to John 0' Groat's 
 house, taking refreshments along with them — a ruin 
 is, of com'se, nothing without a sandwich — and were 
 back next night, making a circuit of 120 miles. 
 Most travellers must be grievously disappointed in 
 the far-famed John O' Groat's house, of which not 
 a fragment remains. The downs in that place, how- 
 ever, are the most vividly and intensely green you 
 ever saw, and the clear white waves break along a 
 beach composed, for many miles' extent, of shells 
 ground to powder ; 
 
 all beside is pebbly length of shote, 
 
 And far as eye can reach, it can discern no more. 
 During our progress along forty miles from Dun- 
 robin to Wick, we drove so close to the sea, that 
 but for the height of the hills, we might have kept 
 one wheel in the water all the way, and the journey 
 was like a voyage, without the discomfort or danger. 
 The distant sea gulls looked like a flight of butter- 
 flies, and the glittering foam was blown in feathers 
 along the ocean, " a moment white, then gone for 
 ever !" Many parts of this coast are bold and fine, 
 though the bleak and barren prevails elsewhere, and 
 several of the fields are so covered with large rocks, 
 some flat and others upright, that the appearance 
 was like that of a church-yard. One proprietor, to 
 
20 HELMSDALE. 
 
 consume the superfluous stones, has built little towers, 
 resembling chessmen, at the corners of several fields; 
 but if the whole had been gathered up, they would 
 make a perfect pyramid of Egypt. 
 
 The flourishing little sea-port of Helmsdale, 
 which now sends out a fleet of several hundred her- 
 ring boats, is inhabited by ci-devant cottagers from 
 the rural parts of Sutherlandshire, where foiiy miles 
 of country, once their home, looks now as if a vic- 
 torious enemy had laid it waste ; every little hamlet 
 in ruins, though the scorched and blackened walls 
 yet remain, the church where once a numerous con- 
 gregation assembled, now so nearly empty, that the 
 parish clergyman might address, his clerk as Dean 
 Swift did, " dearly beloved Roger !" and the unten- 
 anted gardens, still partly enclosed, and more bright- 
 ly green than the surrounding common, 
 
 where once the garden smiled, 
 
 And still where many a garden flower grows wild. 
 
 The villagers long resented this arbitrary sub- 
 stitution of sheep, while they were themselves driven 
 in flocks to the coast, and when any of the Suther- 
 land family appeared in that neighbourhood for some 
 time afterwards, they were followed by crowds an- 
 grily imitating the bleating of sheep ; but if the end 
 could sanctify the means, that measure has turned 
 out well, as the people, formerly steeped in poverty, 
 and sunk in the desponding indolence consequent on 
 
ORD OF CAITHNESS, 21 
 
 hopeless penury, are now become industrious, cheer- 
 ful, and prosperous. We saw the Castle of Helms- 
 dale, looking like the ruins of an old band-box. 
 Once upon a time, however, it had inhabitants, when 
 an atrocious murder was committed there by Isabella 
 Sinclair, who poisoned the Earl and Countess of 
 Sutherland, and was condemned to death for the 
 crime in Edinburgh, but made away with herself on 
 the day of her execution, cursing her cousin, George 
 Earl of Caithness, whom she accused of having in- 
 stigated the crime, that her own son might succeed 
 to the title, a promising youth, who, unfortunately 
 for himself, brought a strange retribution on his am- 
 bitious mother, as he drank the poisoned cup she 
 had prepared for Lord Sutherland's only son, and 
 immediately expired. 
 
 The Ord of Caithness was formerly pre-eminent 
 for being the most dangerous bit of road in Scot- 
 land. Mr. Telford tamed it down, however, into 
 such perfect safety and insignificance, that modern 
 travellers can scarcely credit the difficulty and haz- 
 ard with which ten years ago it was crossed, unless 
 they are shown the old track, an almost perpendi- 
 cular line of loose stones at the edge of an airy pre- 
 cipice. On first beholding this mountainous road 
 since its metamorphosis, I felt somewhat like the 
 fairy whose tent was turned into a thimble ! Du- 
 ring the last century, whenever the late Earl of 
 
22 ORD OF CAITHNESS. 
 
 Caithness, my grandmother Lady Janet Sinclair, or 
 any of the chief landed proprietors, entered that 
 county, a troop of their tenants assembled on the 
 border of Sutherland, and drew the carriage them- 
 selves over the hill, a distance of two niiles, that 
 nothing might be trusted in such a scene to the dis- 
 cretion of quadrupeds. A pretty considerably nar- 
 row, perpendicular road skirted along the very edge 
 of a precipice rising twelve hundred feet abruptly 
 out of the ocean, without the smallest hint of a para- 
 pet, and many travellers, seeing this formidable ob- 
 stacle, turned their horses' heads without proceeding 
 to scale it. The accident-maker for the Diunfries 
 Courier should settle for life here, as there is quite 
 a treasmy of untold stories to be heard in every 
 house, — how the mail was upset in one place, and 
 at another how Lord Duffus had only time to 
 spring out and save his life before his gig and horse 
 went over, and never spoke more. It appears to 
 me, that gigs all come to an untimely end. I never 
 yet saw a newspaper, without one or two having 
 run off, and if ever they are within reach of a pre- 
 cipice, they make a point of going over. The mail- 
 coach now rattles down the whole descent of the 
 Ord, scarcely deigning even to use a drag ! 
 
 It is an old estabhshed superstition, that none of 
 our clan may cross the Ord on a Monday, because 
 on that day of the week, forty Sinclairs, command- 
 
ORD OF CAITHNESS. 23 
 
 ed by the Earl of Caithness, ventured over to the 
 battle of riodden Field, and not one survived ex- 
 cept the driunmer, who was dismissed before the 
 battle began. The whole troop had dressed in 
 green,'and since then it is likewise considered fool- 
 hardy in any one bearing the name of Sinclair to 
 wear green. I question whether we are entitled 
 even to eat green peas, or to drink green tea, and 
 whenever a Sinclair loses his purse, it must of 
 course have been of the objectionable colour. 
 
 When my late father succeeded to his estate, 
 there was not a road, nor a single cart in Caithness, 
 and he introduced the first highway when only eigh- 
 teen years of age. Having been taunted with the 
 impossibility of carrying one over the hill of Ben- 
 cheilt, he went to the place in person, assembled 
 1260 labourers, assigned each a separate spot, where 
 tools and provisions had already been placed, and 
 in one single day, what had only been a rough 
 horse-track in the morning, became fit for carriages 
 before night. Soon after, he suggested the plan to 
 Lord Melville, of obtaining je50,000 as a grant by 
 Parliament, from the Scotch forfeited estates, to make 
 roads and bridges throughout the ultra-northern 
 counties, where the drivers of cattle had to swim 
 with their droves across the rivers when taking 
 them to market ; and from the same fund he ob- 
 tained j£8500 for making a harbour at Wick. 
 
24 BERRroALE. 
 
 A sixth part of Caithness belonged to ray father 
 when he came of age, and he represented the county 
 during more than thirty years. No lover ever felt 
 more anxious to decorate his mistress, than he did 
 to adorn the barren wilds of his native district. He 
 even persuaded himself it was beautiful ! As one 
 proof of his zeal, the romantic entrance to Caithness 
 is richly wooded, for he planted the hills of Berri- 
 dale to their very summits, and sold them afterwards 
 for little more than it cost to embellish them. Two 
 salmon streams unite here, and flow round the base 
 of these mountains, while the road winds circui- 
 tously down to the very bottom of a deep glen, 
 where a charmingly situated inn, built when the 
 trees were planted, lies embosomed in wood. Al- 
 most overhanging this resting place, but nearly two 
 hundred feet higher up the liill, stands Langwell, 
 now the residence of Mr. Donald Home. When 
 the late proprietor, after taking possession of his 
 recently purchased estate, first appeared at church, 
 the parish clergyman, being gratefully attached to 
 my father, looked full in the face of his new auditor, 
 and gave out for his text the fifth verse of the 
 seventy-fifth Psalm, " Lift not up your Horn on 
 high." The clergy in primitive times used to de- 
 light in selecting eccentric texts. One of Bishop 
 Bull's most interesting sermons is on that verse of 
 St. Paul's, " The cloak which I left at Troas, bring 
 
NOTTINGHAM HOUSE. 25 
 
 \vith thee, and also the books, but especially the 
 parchments." A very admirable one was preached 
 once against lukewarmness, on the text, " Ephraim 
 is a cake unturned ;" and a clergyman not long 
 since announced for his subject, " What will this 
 babbler say V 
 
 Some miles north of Berridale, stands the bluff 
 old Castle of Dunbeath, which in old times was 
 garrisoned by the Marquis of Montrose shortly before 
 his death. It juts out into the ocean, with the sea 
 blast whistling through its walls, and the bold dash- 
 ing waves roaring and sparkling at its foot. A 
 spurious attempt at trees in front, scorched with 
 cold till they are perfectly threadbare, actually made 
 me laugh. Two rows had started in a straight line 
 from the road to the house, but about half way they 
 suddenly came to an untimely end. The tall, bare, 
 skeleton trunks, and the perpendicular branches, 
 were huddled all together, with a thin canopy of 
 foliage near the top, as if they were carrying a tray 
 of leaves on their heads. The effect was more 
 comical than you can fancy. 
 
 The next place we passed was Nottingham 
 House, a large bleak lonely mansion, belonging to 
 the male representative of the Sutherland family, 
 who would have inherited that ancient earldom, 
 for which his predecessors had a law-suit, endeav- 
 ouring to prove that the Earls of Sutherland for 
 3 
 
26 WICK. 
 
 three centuries had all been usurpers, but like most 
 old Scotch titles, this was impartially settled in the 
 female line. Nottingham House used formerly to 
 be in sad disrepair, and the late proprietor was 
 overheard once, when a visiter unexpectedly arrived, 
 calling loudly to his servant, " Bring me a fork to 
 open the drawing-room door !" Many of the win- 
 dows were at that time built up, and a clergyman 
 who slept there one night previous to preaching in 
 the parish church, got up next morning and opened 
 his shutters, but seeing no light, he retired to bed, 
 wondering much what had disturbed him so early. 
 Unable to sleep, he watched impatiently for the 
 first glimpse of dawn, thinking that certainly a sleep- 
 less night was a very tedious affair, when at length 
 the clerk rushed into his room, saying that the whole 
 congregation were assembled in their pews, and had 
 waited impatiently for some time ! 
 
 Wick is a sea-port, so fragrant with fish, that 
 when we entered I thought of your brother's voyage 
 in a herring smack, when the seats were barrels of 
 herrings, and the staircase from the cabin formed by 
 piles of casks. One year, many fields in Caithness 
 were manured with herrings ; but none of the pro- 
 prietors find the perfume so oppressive as strangers 
 do, because these fisheries are the chief sources of 
 their wealth, only reaped within the last half cen- 
 tury, when my father advanced money himself, that 
 
WICK. 27 
 
 the inhabitants might try their first experunent of 
 fishing on these coasts, and now 14,000 Caithness 
 fishermen are in constant employment gathering in 
 their annual harvest of herrings. My very letter 
 will smell of fish, if I say another syllable about 
 it, but the flavour cannot be very injurious to health, 
 as I have this evening drank tea with an interesting 
 old lady who has lived here ninety-nine years. 
 During that period she has been a warm-hearted 
 friend to three generations of our family in succes- 
 sion, so you may suppose it was with no ordinary 
 feelings that I went to the house. Her first recep- 
 tion of me was in the true Highland fashion, saying, 
 with an expression of touching retrospection, " Your 
 father's daughter is welcome ;" and after ascer- 
 taining that all our family were well, she added in 
 a tone of earnest feeling, " They cannot be better 
 than I wish them." There was something almost 
 Ossianic in the tone of her language ; and it is 
 pleasing to see not only the faculties, but also the 
 affections, pei-fectly fresh and perfectly wide awake 
 at so advanced a period of life. It had all the so- 
 lemnity of a voice from the dead, when she spoke 
 of former days, and of friends long departed, whose 
 very existence seemed to me a tale of other times. 
 
 When the Romans cursed an enemy, it was in 
 these words, " May you survive all your friends 
 and relations." How often I have thought it would 
 
28 WICK. 
 
 be the saddest feeling of extreme old age, to see 
 " friend after friend depart," — the lights one by one 
 extinguished which enlivened our early days, and to 
 think that those connections on whose kindness we 
 are finally cast will seem cheerless and remote, if 
 none remain who can remember that we were ever 
 young, happy, and beloved, and who have known 
 nothing of us but the dark evening of a life so full 
 of sorrows and infirmities, that it would scarcely 
 seem a duty to weep over its close ! The three mes- 
 sengers of death are accident, sickness, and old age, 
 all unwelcome when they come, but the last is that 
 which requires most sympathy, and too often excites 
 the least, for the reverence paid in ancient times to 
 venerable years is not now universal, having given 
 place in a lamentable degree to indifference, and 
 even to ridicule, though in many instances, a satir- 
 ical feeling is excited, not without justice, against 
 those who will not grow old with a good grace, and 
 who never ask themselves, in the language of Scrip- 
 ture, " How old art thou ?" When I see aged persons 
 vainly struggling to keep up the semblance of youth, 
 that text sometimes occurs to my recollection, " Gray 
 hairs are here and there upon him, and he know^eth 
 it not." The celebrated wit, Lord Norbury, de- 
 termined to have his laugh to the last, laid a bet of 
 jGIOO with his cotemporary, the late Marquis of 
 Drogheda, which would survive. Both were taken 
 
WICK. 29 
 
 ill at once, and Lord Norbury, who lingered longest, 
 
 gained the money, but remarked, that he thought 
 
 it would have turned out " a dead heat." The 
 
 average of human existence is said to be nearly 
 
 double in Britain what it is in Naples ! Old Mrs. 
 
 Butler, whom you remember in Edinburgh walking 
 
 often more than a mile to see me, was ascertained 
 
 to be one hundred and ten when she died, but life 
 
 at such an extreme age is like a flower without 
 
 root, the fost blast lays it low : and in taking leave 
 
 of our aged and respected friend at Wick, I felt a 
 
 solemnizing consciousness that both shall pass into 
 
 another, and I trust a better world, before we meet 
 
 again. 
 
 There everlasting spring abides, 
 And never withering flow'rs ; 
 Death like a narrow sea divides 
 This heav'nly land from ours. 
 
WICK. 
 
 I like the weather when it's not loo cold, 
 That is, I like three months in all the year. 
 
 BVRON. 
 
 My dear Cousin, — We may say here, like Lord 
 Dudley, that the summer has set in with its usual se- 
 verity ! July and August have forgotten themselves 
 completely, and turned a cold shoulder to all their 
 old friends and admirers. In this country the leaves 
 have at all times a short reign, but this year they 
 were frightened to death by a frost, soon after they 
 appeared, looking scorched and lifeless now, espe- 
 cially the fir tribe, which put up with cold blasts 
 worse than many that seem less hardy. 
 
 If travellers would only condescend to forget that 
 there are such things as trees in the world, they could 
 not but admire the bold coast scenery of Caithness, 
 and we walked three miles from Wick this mornins 
 in search of two very strange and tottering old sea- 
 beaten ruins, which have bid defiance to the waves 
 for many centuries. The Castles of Sinclair and 
 Girnigo are but little known, though well worth 
 making acquaintance with, being so remote and so 
 retired from public life, that few tourists are aware 
 
CASTLE GIRNIGO. 31 
 
 of their merit. These time-worn remnants stand 
 side by side, and the oldest wears well, while the 
 other is a mere wreck, yet the entire mass is mag- 
 nificent, towering out of the broad ocean in a noble 
 and commanding style. The situation is very dig- 
 nified and impressive. A natural wall of perpen- 
 dicular rock, about sixty feet high, runs out like a 
 long pier into the ocean, surrounded on three sides 
 by a boiling foam of waves, struggling forward, and 
 lashing themselves in ceaseless fury at its base. On 
 the utmost verge of this point, and scarcely to be 
 distinguished from the natural masonry of rock, stands 
 the massy wall of Castle Girnigo, still about five 
 stories high, and looking ahuost habitable, the win- 
 dows, doors, and loop-holes, being faced with red 
 free-stone, conspicuously seen amidst the surround- 
 ing mass of sea-green walls. A curious subterra- 
 nean staircase descends far beneath the level of the 
 tide, and a narrow concealed passage under ground 
 leads to a creek w^here the waves beat in with angry 
 vehemence, and where a boat was formerly hid, in 
 wliich the family of Lord Caithness escaped when 
 the fortress was besieged and about to be taken. 
 
 A tall tottering fragment of Castle Sinclair rears 
 its venerable head on high, looking nearly as unsafe as 
 the pillars of brick built by children, which cannot 
 be balanced above five minutes, and yet not a stone 
 has fallen within the memory of the oldest man in 
 
32 WICK. 
 
 the parish. There is an "oldest man" in all par- 
 ishes, who remembers eveiy thing, and vouches for 
 all remarkable facts. 
 
 The family motto of Lord Caithness is, " Com- 
 mit thy work to God." It seems rather inappro- 
 priate to an earl of ancient times, known as " George 
 the wicked," who became chancellor of Scotland, 
 and lived a great part of his long and atrocious life 
 within the walls of Girnigo Castle, w^here we saw 
 the room in which his second son, William Sinclair, 
 was slain by his own eldest brother John, who bruised 
 him to death with his fetters during his imprison- 
 ment there, and where the earl cruelly starved to 
 death his eldest son. He himself died at Edinbingh, 
 and his- body lies interred at Roslin Chapel ; but he 
 desired that his heart — such as it was — should be 
 buried in a handsome cemetery, raised in honour of 
 his murdered son, and which still remains, forming 
 an ornament to the city of Wick, where so much 
 hospitality now prevails, that we saw little danger 
 of any one being starved in the present day. Caith- 
 ness piques itself on giving the best breakfasts in 
 Scotland, and I wish you could have accompanied 
 us to the manse this morning, where every guest 
 would require half-a-dozen appetites to achieve what 
 his knife and fork are expected to do. The lady 
 who said her appetite required to be amused, should 
 have taken her place here, surrounded by all the 
 
WICK. 33 
 
 dishes peculiar to a Highland dejeune. You would 
 be much surprised at seeing the Caithness geese, 
 which are smoked and salted like Westphalia hams, 
 and are said to sharpen the appetite amazingly, 
 though a gentleman once complained that he did 
 not find it so, having picked the bones of one, with- 
 out feeling a whit more hungry ! 
 
 In the parish of Wick may be seen the truth of 
 Dr. Chalmers's remark, that " a house-going minister 
 makes a church-going people." Nothing can ex- 
 ceed the reverence which every Christian here de- 
 lights in testifying towards the zealous, able, and 
 long-tried servant of God who officiates among them. 
 It is anxiously hoped, that one so fitted to guide 
 others, may long be spared himself; but having been 
 lately in precarious health, Mr. Phin fainted twice 
 last Sunday in the pulpit. The use of restoratives 
 revived him the first time, and he resumed the ser- 
 vice, but a few minutes afterwards he had a more 
 prolonged attack, which obliged him to desist, and 
 the congregation dispersed, many of them in tears. 
 Next morning the manse gate was besieged by par- 
 ishioners, eagerly inquiring how he had passed the 
 night, and several old women forced their way into 
 the house, with various infallible nostrums to cure 
 his disorder, but unanimous in only one point, which 
 was, in earnestly admonishing him to " take nothing 
 the doctor ordered!" Here the common people 
 
34 WICK. 
 
 have a superstitious horror of the faculty, being per- 
 fectly convinced, that, hke rat-catchers, they bring 
 the evil they profess to cure ; and three years ago, 
 an Edinburgh apothecary narrowly escaped with 
 his life, being suspected of importing the cholera to 
 Wick in his pill-box. 
 
 From the manse windows, Mr. Phin pointed out 
 to me a newly erected " Popish chapel," which he 
 looked at as if it were a mine dug under the town, 
 and ready to explode. K the rapid extension of 
 Roman Catholic influence were regarded with the 
 same salutary horror in quarters where it may yet 
 prove more dangerous, we might indeed rejoice, for 
 it is an alarming circumstance to a Protestant na- 
 tion, if anything can thoroughly alarm us, that such 
 edifices are arising in every part of Scotland, though 
 fortunately they are as yet only like traps set to 
 catch a congregation, — the casket without the 
 jewels, — not being yet, in most instances, supplied 
 with audiences. This very small chapellette at 
 Wick is only attended by a few soldiers' wives from 
 Ireland, and the funds for raising it were in no de- 
 
 Since writing the above, this exemplary minister of Christ 
 has been called into the presence of that almighty Being, in 
 a better world, whom he so faithfully served upon earth. 
 His last hours were full of hope, peace, and Christian resig- 
 nation ; and amidst the heartfelt grief of his numerous con- 
 gregation, it may still be said, " He being dead, yet speaketh." 
 
WICK. 35 
 
 gree contributed by Caithness. It has been conjec- 
 tured that the Papists wished to boast of their 
 dominion reaching to every extremity of Britain; 
 but I hope we shall never come quite to Archbishop 
 Magee's antithesis about the Irish, when he offended 
 all parties by saying, that they have " a church 
 without a religion, and a religion without a church!" 
 At the ancient house of Kilravock, which I have 
 already described, there is now to be seen a bull, 
 signed by the Pope's own hand, granting plenary 
 remission of all their sins, to Colonel Rose's family, 
 and to every branch of his house, from the date of 
 this document, to a period of which there are still 
 about forty years to run ; but I am happy to under- 
 stand that none of this family have yet taken any 
 very extraordinary advantage of their uncommon 
 privileges. 
 
 Two ladies of rank in different parts of Scotland, 
 within the last three years, have each built a chapel, 
 entirely at her own expense, as large as the parish 
 church. One of them, raised by the present Duchess 
 of Leeds, I saw, the architecture of which, like that 
 of all Popish buildings, is beautiful. It should be 
 the ambition of Protestants, to out-church, out-pray, 
 and out-preach those zealous sectarians, for we are 
 too apt to regard Roman Catholic supremacy, and 
 Roman Catholic persecutions as a tale of other 
 times, totally extinct now, like the superstitions of 
 
36 STIRKOKE. 
 
 ghosts and -svitchcraft, which I trust may be the 
 case ; but one would wish on such a subject, as 
 Shakspeare says, " to make assurance doubly sure," 
 leaving those who advocate the worse cause. 
 
 To prove their doctrine orthodox, 
 By apostolic blows and knocks. 
 
 If we had a horticultural show in Caithness, 
 every prize ought to be gained by the gardener at 
 Stirkoke, where an unusual variety of flowers has 
 been enlisted into the servdce, and the proprietor, 
 Mr. Home, wages a perpetual and successful war 
 against the northern blasts. Rhododendrons are 
 there in splendid flower, dwarf rhododendrons in a 
 blaze of blossoms, and pansies equal to any I have 
 seen elsewhere. The Russian cranberry is expected 
 some time or other to produce fruit ; the camellias 
 are doing their very best to live ; the fir-trees are 
 not yet perfectly dead ; sixty acres of hard wood 
 in eveiy variety are very thriving ; the forest trees 
 
 have grown so tall, that A- could not touch the 
 
 top of them with his mnbrella ; and a most beauti- 
 ful green-house is glowing with geraniums, fuschias, 
 passion-flowers, musk-plants, and balsams, besides 
 which, in the open air, we observed several exotics 
 from the south, such as wall-flowers, honeysuckles, 
 jessamine, &c. &c. In short, it is astonishing how 
 much embellishment may be effected by perse- 
 
STIRKOKE. 37 
 
 verance and enterprise, for the general aspect of 
 Stirkoke is quite verdant, the house not much over- 
 topping the trees, and the leaves almost as green in 
 July, as we generally see them in October. In 
 some places nearer the sea it was very different, for 
 the unhappy looking forests resembled an old broom 
 turned up, and a stranger remarked, there was not 
 a tree in Caithness on which any one who was tired 
 of life, could hang himself. 
 
 In the plantations at Stirkoke, we started a fine 
 covey of young pheasants, probably the most north- 
 ern colony of these birds in the world. A noble 
 looking red deer also was tethered in the park, 
 looking so quiet and domestic, that it seemed curious 
 to think what days of toil and sleepless nights a 
 sportsman would gladly have endured, to see the 
 mere tips of his horns, but there he stood safe from 
 every gun, though ready to be shot at the short- 
 est notice. A French cook in the Highlands some 
 years ago, sent up the most magnificent dinner, made 
 entirely of red-deer venison, and no one could have 
 found out how nearly all the various dishes were 
 connected, but the second course must have been 
 rather defective, consisting only of hartshorn jelly. 
 The flavour is rather powerful, but a Frenchman 
 can disguise any thing, or cook a white leather 
 glove into a palatable morsel, never being reduced 
 to quite such straits as the Scotch housekeeper you 
 4 
 
38 STmKOKE. 
 
 told me of, who, trusting to the impunity with 
 which her ungainly side-dishes usually escaped un- 
 tasted from the dining-room, and finding herself at 
 a loss to fill up one corner of the table, sent up a 
 finely formed shape of porridge under a white sauce. 
 Nothing makes cheerfulness flow in upon the 
 spirits more certainly than travelling, — the con- 
 stantly varying panorama of new ideas and new 
 subjects of interest, besides a fair opportunity for 
 grumbling whenever you feel in the humour, which, 
 I am convinced, is a great luxury to some travellers, 
 from the frequent use they make of it. We all 
 wish to be either envied or pitied ; and at present I 
 could make out a very good case either way, ac- 
 cording to the representation of our pleasures or 
 difficulties on the road j but I am always for view- 
 ing the bright side of every thing, and never would 
 wish to look at the sim as philosophers do, merely 
 to discover the spots. 
 
 Having now sent you three sheets of the best 
 superfine Bath post, it is time to economize my 
 stationery, and to wish you a safe journey through 
 what I have already written ; therefore, with best 
 wishes, adieu ; and, as the poet, whoever he was, 
 very sensibly remarks, 
 
 " An adieu should in utterance die, 
 
 When written should faintly appear, 
 
 Only heard in the sob of a sigh, 
 
 Or seen in the blot of a tear.'' 
 
CAITHNESS 
 
 To gain his purpose, he performed Ihe part 
 Of a good actor, and prepared to start. 
 
 My dear Cousin, — Letter-writing brings forth 
 the dormant ideas that would otherwise slumber in 
 our minds, and arranges them before us, like nine- 
 pins out of a box. Mine tumble out so miscellane- 
 ously, that they will not be very easily drilled into 
 order ; but I hope you may be sufficiently interested 
 to grope your way on with me. As Bishop Hall 
 says, " curiosity is the appetite of the mind," so we 
 shall suppose you are perfectly dying of it now, and 
 require as much mental food as our travels can pos- 
 sibly supply. 
 
 One of the best farmers in this county, my 
 brother's tenant, Mr. Gunn, is the fifteenth in regu- 
 lar descent, from father to son, who has occupied 
 the same land ! He has six sons, all skilful agri- 
 culturists, several of whom have already made them- 
 selves comfortably independent, and his mode of in- 
 structing them in business is uncommon, as well as 
 extremely judicious. The beautiful and romantic 
 little farm of Dalmore, M^hich he rents from Sir 
 
40 CAITHNESS. 
 
 George, has been sub-let to each of his sons in suc- 
 cession as they grew up, and there they serve an 
 apprenticeship in the management of this small con- 
 cern, for which their father exacts the full value. 
 He annually purchases their stock, and drives as 
 close a bargain with his sons as if they were 
 strangers, until each is thoroughly versed in all the 
 mysteries of the field and of the market-place. Two 
 of these young men made six thousand pounds last 
 year in Sutherlandshire, by the sale of sheep and 
 wool ; so farmers need scarcely emigrate to Austra- 
 lia to make fortunes in that line : and affluence may 
 still be realized at home, by those who have pru- 
 dence and industry. It was the saying, long ago, 
 of a person who knew the world better than either 
 you or I, that " many succeed by talent, many by a 
 miracle, but most people by beginning without a 
 shilling !" 
 
 Since we arrived in Caithness, the eldest of these 
 promising young men has been suddenly cut off, at 
 the early age of twenty-five, by the small-pox, which 
 occasions a deep sensation of sympathy and sorrow 
 throughout the whole county ; and many of the 
 chief proprietors assembled at his funeral, as well as 
 an immense concourse of people, to testify their res- 
 pect and regret. Fifty years since the proprietors 
 in this county scarcely improved an acre a-year, 
 but now several East Lothian farmers have found it 
 
THUKSO. 41 
 
 worth while to take land in this neighbourhood for 
 feeding young cattle ; and one of them has brought 
 a sister with him to manage his household affairs, 
 who sets an example, that I hope may be followed 
 by all the pianoforte-playing farmeresses in Scotland, 
 as she personally assists in every variety of active 
 employment suited to her station. I was told that 
 all the milk in the dairy is taken to her every morn- 
 ing, and is never seen again till she has churned it 
 into butter ; and then the profits of her poultry-yard, 
 which amount in most places to considerably less 
 than nothing, are, by her skilful management, suf- 
 ficient to pay for all the tea and groceries used in 
 her brother's house. 
 
 The drive from Wick to Thurso is about twenty 
 miles long, through a highly cultivated country, 
 where fields of the richest grain, and substantial 
 farm-houses, ornament the scene ; but the less we 
 say the better about beauty, for the road is as level 
 and as treeless as your drawing-room floor. A folio 
 page is now in existence, attested by the clergy and 
 gardeners in the county, containing an exact cata- 
 logue of all the trees growing in Caithness a hun- 
 dred years ago, in which even the currant-bushes 
 are recorded ; but since then, by the indefatigable 
 exertions of Mr. Traill, the late Earl of Caithness, 
 and my father, the woods and forests could not so 
 
 easily give a census of their population. Some of 
 4* 
 
42 THURSO. 
 
 our own, at a distance, look very like tattered ura- 
 brellas ! 
 
 The first view of Thurso from the south, in a 
 fine day, is exceedingly striking and beautiful, in- 
 cluding the gigantic headlands of Orkney. The 
 " Old rnan of Hoy" standing a thousand feet above 
 the sea ; the Pentland Frith connecting the Atlantic 
 r.nd German Oceans, and sprinkled with a multitude 
 of ships ; the tall abrupt rocks of Holbourn Head ; 
 the charming bay of Scrabster, considered the best 
 harbour on this coast ; the river sweeping through 
 the town ; the elegant bridge ; the new church, 
 larger than any north of Inverness ; the bright yel- 
 low sands ; the numerous villas and farm-houses ; 
 and though last, certainly not least, the ancient 
 towers of Thurso Castle, built by George Earl of 
 Caithness, in 1660, and belonging since 1718 to our 
 family, now represented by the county member. Sir 
 George Sinclair. 
 
 I was amused to hear that some Eno-lish travel- 
 
 o 
 
 lers inquired once at the Thurso inn, whether there 
 were many fine pictures at this castle, when the ' 
 waiter, who had never beheld any others, confi- 
 dently replied, that the collection was first-rate, 
 very old, and well worth seeing. The connoiseurs 
 hastened over accordingly, their heads filled Math 
 Corregios and Titians, when, melancholy to relate, 
 not so much as a single Sir Joshua Reynolds or 
 
THURSO CASTLE. 43 
 
 Jameson rewarded their pains, but merely eight 
 generations of very formal looking ancestors, appear- 
 ing exactly like every other person's ancestors, the 
 most remote portraits exhibiting the smallest waists 
 and largest wigs, while they all became less exag- 
 gerated towards our own time. 
 
 A recent addition has been made to Thurso 
 Castle, planned and executed by Burn, the cobbler- 
 general of worn-out houses, by whom ancient edifices 
 are mended, cleaned, dyed, and repaired, to look 
 as good as new, or even better. When A per- 
 ceived flaws in the architecture of several old castles 
 lately, he wished they were all " Burn'd" like ours. 
 Certainly the situation here is somewhat uncom- 
 mon. In former times, showers of spray from the 
 ocean used to dash up to our drawing-room window, 
 when the waves, curling and grating along the 
 shore, sometimes struck at the foundation with ani- 
 mated vehemence, and rebounded among the rocks, 
 till at length a breakwater was raised to defend the 
 wall. My grandmother Lady Janet used to describe, 
 that many years ago, when sitting by her own fire- 
 side, a vessel was wrecked off the coast, so near the 
 turrets, that she could hear the people's voices, yet 
 though evei-y effort was used on behalf of the crew, 
 " to yield them hope, w^hom help could never 
 reach," not a life was saved from the wreck ! 
 
 You might have imagined, that in such a posi- 
 
44 THURSO CASTLE. 
 
 tion as I have described, this house was near enough 
 to the sea, but my father hked the pecuUarity of 
 being so intimate with the wild winds and waves, 
 so he caused a strong pier to be raised between the 
 old castle and the water, on which Mr. Burn has 
 contrived securely to perch a terrace walk and an 
 appendix to the building. I hope it may turn out 
 as long-lived as the Irishman's railway, which was 
 to last for ever, and might afterwards be sold for 
 old iron. 
 
 Several very handsome new apartments are here, 
 from the windows of which I can at this moment 
 count a procession of twenty vessels in full sail, 
 some of which come so close, they are tacking into 
 the very room, while the stormy surge beats up so 
 near to where I sit, that it seems to undermine the 
 very floor. We had a dispute here once, whether 
 the bright blue ocean, sprinkled with white sails, 
 was not as beautiful an object, as a green park 
 dotted with trees, besides being fully more varied, 
 and I wish you were present to award us the supe- 
 riority. The roughest and strongest tide on the 
 Scotch coast is through the Pentland Frith, running 
 at the rate of nine miles an hour. It is what our 
 old housekeeper calls " a contramaceous and cantan- 
 kerous sea ;" and on the opposite coast of Holbourn 
 Head and Orkney, where the time-worn rocks stand 
 up as straight as an arrow, the waves are leaping 
 
THURSO CASTLE. 45 
 
 ten or twenty feet high, becoming so perfectly white 
 with foam, they look like apparitions starting out of 
 the water, and vanishing again, while the vessels 
 flitting silently and tracklessly along, like wreaths 
 of mist at the horizon, are now and tlien lighted up 
 by a brilliant gleam of sunshine shed upon the 
 water, as if a path of glory were stretched across, 
 which it would be a long day's journey to pass 
 over. 
 
 On the beach of Thurso may now be seen the 
 hulk of a ship wrecked under our windows last 
 winter, and many tragical accidents have occurred 
 at various times to the little herring vessels, foity of 
 which pass this way in the evening, dancing on the 
 waves so perfectly joyous and safe looking, that last 
 night I had actually the courage to wish myself on 
 board of one. Nothing can be more like the life of 
 a gambler than that of a fisherman. Sometimes 
 they make ten pounds at a single haul, and often 
 not tenpence in a day. I was particularly sorry for 
 one Caithness fisherman this year, who had caught 
 sixty crans, each equal to a barrel of herrings, at a 
 single draught, worth about jESO, but wishing to 
 complete the hundred crans, he tried another suc- 
 cessful pull, which sunk his boat, worth .£100, 
 carried away his net, and left the unfortunate specu- 
 lator with nothing but his life remaining. How 
 constantly we are reminded, that " slow^ and sure" 
 
46 THURSO CASTLE. 
 
 is the best rule in pursuing wealth, and that we 
 cmsh the butterfly by snatching at it too eagerly. 
 
 When the present Duke of Sutherland dined 
 many years ago at Thurso Castle, our fishermen were 
 eager to prove the productiveness of this coast; 
 therefore two and twenty different kinds of fish were 
 placed on table at once, including salmon, cod, 
 turbot, ling, tusk, haddock, and every thing that 
 swims, besides an odd fish, called, from its resem- 
 blance to the feline species, the cat-fish, and consid- 
 ered a great delicacy, though not a very prepossess- 
 ing one. The salmon-fishing for this river was then 
 let for j£1000 a year. It is recorded in the parish 
 books of Thurso, that in 1786, no less than 2560 
 salmon were taken out of the river at one sweep of the 
 net ! Such is the violence of the tides at sea, when 
 the billows get into a rage during stormy weather, 
 that cod and ling are, by the force of the waves, 
 frequently thrown alive upon the shores at Canisbay. 
 
 It is pleasing, in this remote country, to see so 
 universal a confidence in the safety of life and pro- 
 perty ! Not a door or a window is fastened at night, 
 nor a shutter closed, and no means of defence pro- 
 vided, not even so much as a red-hot poker. The 
 old alarm-bell is speechless, and Oliver Twist might 
 be thrust into the butler's pantry at any hour of the 
 night or day, without danger or diflficulty. No pro- 
 vision being made in Scotland for the maintenance 
 
THURSO CASTLE. 47 
 
 and confinement of insane persons, an old woman 
 used, when I was here last, to haimt this house, 
 causing great annoyance to its inhabitants, by con- 
 cealing herself under the beds, or in the closets. A 
 lady on one occasion, hearing the drawers in her 
 dressing-room opening and shutting most unaccount- 
 ably, as it appeared, of their own accord, hurried in 
 to ascertain the cause, and found this poor maniac 
 nearly undressed, and shaking out all her gowns to 
 select the one she liked best for herself. This im- 
 fortunate creature on another occasion stole up to 
 the top of a turret, where the maids were assembled, 
 locked up the whole establishment, and threw the 
 key into Thurso river, intending to keep them in 
 perpetual imprisonment ; and thus no hour of the 
 night or day was secure from her incursions, some- 
 times in anger and sometimes in jest. These two 
 states of mind border very closely on each other, in 
 cases of derangement, of which I know one very 
 curious instance. When the Duchess of — — first 
 showed symptoms of insanity, she was sitting with 
 our friend Lady at dinner tete-a-tete, appa- 
 rently in great spirits and good himiour, during which 
 she occasionally made little pellets of bread, and 
 fiUipped them across the table at her companion^ 
 who at length took up the jest, and did likewise, on 
 observing which, the Duchess instantly started up 
 with flaming eyes, seized the carving-knife, and 
 
48 THUESO CASTLE. 
 
 hurried furiously toward her companion. Lady 
 
 fled for her hfe, and she used to make her auditors 
 tremble when describing her flight through the long 
 
 narrow passages of Castle, and how she saw the 
 
 tall figure of the Duchess in a white dress, striding 
 along and brandishing the knife in her hands. For- 
 tunately Lady reached a distant door, and 
 
 locked herself up, but there she remained in a state 
 of siege for several hours before the servants came 
 to her protection. The Duchess remained ever 
 afterwards in close confinement, but no salutary 
 restraint is laid on our visiter from Thurso, who was 
 still alive on my arrival, but fortunately did not 
 hear of our being come in time to leave her card 
 for us. 
 
 In the old castle some years ago, we had an 
 aged housekeeper, who claimed the gift of second- 
 sight j and when walking one evening near the shore 
 of Thurso, she suddenly gave a startling scream, and 
 told the people near her that a boat had been upset 
 on the bar of the river ; naming three men who were 
 drowned, and one that she saw swimming to land. 
 The friends who accompanied her perceived nothing 
 of this, and laughed at her ; but next evening, about 
 the same hour, the boat she had described actually 
 was lost there, and all the three fishermen she had 
 named perished. How truly it has been remarked, 
 that " the veil which conceals futurity was woven 
 
SCRABSTER CASTLE. 49 
 
 Ly the hand of mercy." This old housekeeper 
 insisted, also, for the honour of Thurso Castle, that 
 one room was haunted, though I never could exactly 
 ascertain who had been muidered there, nor in what 
 shape the apparition might be expected. She 
 always gave an impressively superstitious shake of 
 the head when speaking of this apartment, saying, 
 that once she had attempted to pass a night in it, but 
 what took place must never be told ; only, on that 
 memorable occasion, it was well known, that, after 
 an hour or two, she hastily vacated her position, and 
 would never return there alone after dusk. A gen- 
 tleman hearing these rumours, insisted once, when 
 visiting at Thm'so Castle, on occupying this room, 
 and- came down to breakfast next morning with a 
 large black patch on his forehead, gravely protest- 
 ing to the old woman, when she waylaid him in 
 the passage, that the ghost had taken him out of bed 
 in the middle of the night, and tossed him three times 
 up to the roof of the room, till he was nearly killed, 
 adding, that he never would sleep there again, a 
 resolution very easily adhered to, as he was then 
 leaving the country for good. 
 
 This morning we walked to inspect Her Majesty's 
 Royal Castle of Scrabster. My father was the 
 hereditary high Constable there ; but it is to be 
 hoped no probability exists of a Royal visit, as the 
 accommodation would be somewhat deficient — there 
 5 
 
50 THURSO. 
 
 being excellent grazing for a single sheep in the 
 only apartment of which any remains are visible, 
 and the small fragment of wall looks as if it could 
 be thrown over with your little finger. Here, in 
 former times a Bishop of Caithness was murdered. 
 The people in those days not being allowed a veto, 
 took the law into their own hands, and, with a degree 
 of cruelty which a New Zealander would be ashamed 
 of, thrust him alive into a caldron, and boiled him 
 to death. It was perhaps in allusion to this tragical 
 story, that when your cousin dined with the Lord 
 High Commissioner, expecting to meet nobody but 
 clergymen in black, and saw, instead, only officers in 
 scarlet, he suddenly exclaimed, " You have boiled 
 all the ministers!" ' 
 
 The new church at Thurso, the chief expense 
 of building which, in a very superior style of archi- 
 tecture, was incurred by my father, is quite a little 
 cathedral, being the handsomest edifice north of 
 Inverness, partly formed of a very hard stone im- 
 ported from Morayshire. In the gallery here, the 
 congregation resembles in dress and appearance what 
 you might expect to see at any fashionable church in 
 London, with bonnets a Id Carsan, scarcely a week 
 old, from Paris or London. Women in the lower 
 orders all wear clean white caps, or " mutches,'' as 
 they are called, and large blue cloaks, like bathing- 
 dresses, which hide all deficiencies, and give to their 
 
THURSO. 51 
 
 appearance an air of grave respectability. The ex- 
 pression of their countenance exhibits more than 
 common acuteness ; and one group of men in the 
 lower classes reminded me of Raphael's cartoon, re- 
 presenting Paul preaching to the philosophers at 
 Athens, their countenances wore so criticizing an 
 aspect of dubious -approbation, apparently more in- 
 tent on discovering the preacher's fault than their 
 own. One aged female, most conspicuously atten- 
 tive, at last pulled the hood of her cloak entirely 
 over her face, and seemed wrapped in meditation ; 
 but I missed an old woman of former days, who al- 
 ways listened to the sermon on account of our 
 fa'mily rather than on her own, and frequently held 
 up her finger to our pew when any thing was said 
 on the danger of riches and prosperity, or on the evils 
 of " Greek learning and Latin philosophy," a favour- 
 ite subject of declamation with the late incumbent 
 of this parish. Opposite to his pulpit, in those days, 
 sat a learned English scholar and skilful physician, 
 Dr. Torrens, for whom my father had obtained an 
 Excise appointment here, that he might be induced 
 by the emolmnent to settle and practise in so remote 
 a district. An irresistible smile often stole over his 
 intelligent features when hearing the new views of 
 history, chronology, and the classics, then promul- 
 gated by a clergyman who had been appointed at 
 the earnest request of the parishioners. Having, on 
 
52 THURSO. 
 
 one occasion, allowed a young stranger to preach 
 for him, our parish minister was observed to be 
 restless and uneasy till the sermon was concluded, 
 and stopped the congregation, when about to dis- 
 perse, by standing up in his own pew, and saying, 
 " My friends ! you have this morning heard enough 
 about the law, let me give you a little of the 
 gospel 1" 
 
 On another occasion he argued at great length 
 with an antagonist, as learned in divinity, and more 
 skilful in argument than himself, but after retiring 
 apparently confuted, he gave out, on the following 
 Sunday, a text suitable to the previous discussion, 
 and then supposed a dialogue between a Pharisee 
 and a Christian, wherein his opponent's reasoning 
 appeared to considerable disadvantage, while his 
 own replies were of course finally successful. 
 
 My late father, who valued what he possessed 
 only in proportion as it might benefit others, trans- 
 ferred the patronage of this parish, when it became 
 vacant, a second time to the inhabitants of Thurso, 
 allowing them again the free choice of their own 
 pastor, and in the present instance they have been 
 extremely fortunate. The first candidate who ap- 
 peared, Mr. Taylor, after delivering one very elo- 
 quent sermon, was elected almost by acclamation ! 
 I accompanied my father out of church on that Sun- 
 day, when we were surrounded by a crowd in 
 
THURSO. 53 
 
 perfect transports with what had been preached, 
 and their unanimous presentation was instantly 
 cordially acceded to. My father felt delighted to 
 be so well out of " the scrape," as he considered it, 
 having been apprehensive of serious differences ; 
 but next morning a deputation of the parishioners 
 called at Thurso Castle to say, that upon further 
 consideration, they began to fear the election had 
 been rashly made, and it was thought desirable to 
 hear more candidates. Foreseeing the anarchy and 
 confusion this would occasion, my father replied that 
 the congregation must abide by their original deci- 
 sion. They accordingly did so, which the fifteen 
 hundred patrons at Thurso have never since had any 
 reasonable cause to regret. 
 
 Mr. Burn, the dissenting clergyman here, has 
 adopted an excellent plan to discourage backbiting 
 among his congregation. The moment any indivi- 
 dual begins gossiping out a story to the disparage- 
 ment of another, he gravely produces pen, ink, and 
 paper, desiring his visiter to write down all the parti- 
 culars, as they must be brought before the session. 
 Having repeatedly insinuated this threat, a panic has 
 been spread among informers and scandal-mongers, 
 so that no one ventures to say a word of his neigh- 
 bour which might not be printed. Besides the advan- 
 tage of checking ill-nature, this expedient will in- 
 crease his own efficiency, by proving his unwilling- 
 
54 THURSO. 
 
 ness to take up any evil report against members of 
 the congregation ; moreover it seems a most judi- 
 cious remark of Mrs. Fry's, that in addressing sinners, 
 it is always best to remain ignorant of their peculiar 
 failings, or the admonitions of a preacher become 
 inevitably too personal. Rowland Hill used to say, 
 that every sermon should have three R's in it. 
 Ruin by the fall, — ^Redemption by Christ, — Regene- 
 ration by the Holy Spirit, — and if to these be added 
 an earnest and affectionate application of gospel 
 truth, to the hearts and minds of a congregation, no 
 personal animadversions could improve the effect ; 
 yet I have known more than one preacher make 
 very marked allusion to individuals when present, 
 and an instance was pointed out to me once in Eng- 
 land, where a nobleman of perfectly unimpeachable 
 moral character had been literally preached out of 
 his own pew. Those who are ambassadors should 
 surely be careful that no private feelings of their 
 own interfere with the due delivery of their message, 
 but remember that they represent a Lawgiver, who 
 summons all, without exception, to come and hear 
 the words of eternal life ; that the very presence of 
 any individual in church indicates a certain degree 
 of obedience, which ought to be encouraged, and 
 that those who are not against us are for us. Unless, 
 therefore, an open breach be committed of any 
 known commandment, or an obvious desecration of 
 
THURSO. 55 
 
 the Sabbath, all should assemble in church on the 
 same common ground of being sinners in need of 
 salvation, but the pulpit was never intended as a 
 place for inquisitorial commentaries on the details of 
 private life. 
 
 A stranger who preached last month at Thurso, 
 having heard that a charity ball had taken place 
 there, fulminated a vehement censure on all those 
 who attended. The sacrament being about to take 
 place, he said, among other remarks, that " those 
 who had gone to the tap-room were unfit for the 
 Lord's table," and this being considered in the light 
 of a prohibition, several residents who had attended 
 the ordinance unremittingly for thirty years were 
 thus hindered from appearing. 
 
 In respect to amusements for the young, I can- 
 not but advocate the temperate use of those that 
 seem innocent, rather than total abstinence, though 
 the frantic excess to which they are carried in some 
 houses, might make any Christian hesitate in doing 
 so, as we are bound solemnly to remember, that 
 those things which may be lawful when kept in due 
 subordination, are nevertheless not always expedient. 
 It has generally appeared to me, that the entire dis- 
 use of those relaxations natural to youth, too fre- 
 quently leads either to vice, or tO slothful indolence, 
 or to hypochondriacal fancies about health. It is 
 the excess of all earthly things that is to be avoided. 
 
56 THURSO. 
 
 and the highest exercise of Christian principle is, 
 to enjoy, without abusing, the gifts of Providence. 
 Men occasionally drown themselves in water, but 
 water is not on that account to be abjured ; and the 
 exercise of dancing seems to have no more intrinsic 
 evil in it, than running or leaping, if kept in strict 
 moderation, and allowed to interfere with no essen- 
 tial duty. If we could get over what Lord Dudley 
 called the "national insanity" of late hours, so that 
 balls were to begin earlier, and end sooner, one of 
 the greatest objections to that amusement would be 
 obviated. A dance beginning at six, and ending at 
 eleven, instead of beginning at eleven, and ending 
 at six, might be equally agreeable, and could lead 
 to no such dissipation of mind, as is now to be 
 lamented in those who enter on the amusements of 
 life to an extreme which obliges all rationally dis- 
 posed persons to withdraw from them entirely. The 
 ball at Thurso led to no excess either in hours or 
 expense, but some political estrangement having 
 previously taken place between near neighbours and 
 old friends, it was thought desirable that they should 
 meet on neutral ground, and associate once more on 
 terms of cordiality; therefore about forty persons 
 assembled, and danced off any feehngs of irritability 
 which had existed, believing that in doing so, no 
 violation of duty was committed, while a restora- 
 tion had thus been made to sociabilit}^ and good 
 
THURSO. 57 
 
 neighbourhood, which it is so desirable always to 
 preserve inviolate among Christians, 
 
 If the world had been partitioned into cells, like 
 a honey-comb, and each individual's own sphere of 
 action limited "wdthin a separate enclosure, none of 
 those admonitions respecting our conduct in society, 
 so lavishly scattered over the sacred pages, would 
 have been recorded ; but the miser who hoards his 
 time without spending it well, goes to one extreme, 
 while the spendthrift who wastes it on vain and 
 heartless amusement, falls into an opposite excess. 
 The true medium is foimd in Holy Scripture, where 
 social intercourse among Christians is continually 
 alluded to, though always in subservience to higher 
 and holier duties, with the incessant observance of 
 which, neither the pleasures, nor even the affections 
 of this life, must ever be allowed to interfere. 
 
 There were two county newspapers published 
 till lately in Caithness ; and in the far north, the 
 Court circular and the fashions are most assiduously 
 studied, for whether her Majesty be pleased to ride 
 in Windsor Park, or to drive towards Kew Gardens, 
 is fully as much discussed here as in the more im- 
 mediate orbit of her royal presence. In Ross-shire, 
 I was amused to hear of a book club, where one of 
 the farmers ordered the novel called "Almack's," 
 being anxious, he said, to ascertain what the quality 
 were about ; and throughout the Highlands, every 
 
58 BARROGILL CASTLE. 
 
 on dit respecting Buckingham Palace travels as 
 safely and expeditiously northwards as the last new 
 bonnet, being only a little enlarged, and a very little 
 more trimmed and embellished, during its progress, 
 though still in some degree resembling the original 
 pattern. 
 
 Connoiseurs in comfort would find it a perfect 
 study to see Barrogill Castle, belonging to the Earl 
 of Caithness, Lord Lieutenant of this county.. It is, 
 as auctioneers often say, " every way suitable for a 
 nobleman of rank," with all the internal elegance 
 of a house in London, and all the exterior dignity 
 of an ancient Highland residence. Some admirable 
 improvements have been recently made by Burn ; 
 and the staircase, wliich was formerly outside, as 
 high as the drawing-room floor, is now thrown into 
 the house, while several windows have been thrown 
 out, which were greatly wanted. In those peaceful 
 times, when there is no longer any necessity for a 
 castle to be fortified, it is pleasing to see the gloomy 
 strength of former days exchanged for a more smil- 
 ing aspect ; and here we found some first-rate pic- 
 tures by the best masters, a haunted apartment, 
 abundance of interesting family portraits, and a 
 forest of the very best trees that Caitlmess can 
 produce. 
 
 apropos of trees, when we went in a gig yes- 
 terday to see Castle Hill, belonging to Mr. Traill, 
 
BARROGILL CASTLE. 59 
 
 the most persevering improver now in the North, I 
 was very nearly killed in consequence of our Caith- 
 ness horse taking fright at a tree ! He was evi- 
 dently imused to the chequered shadow of leaves on 
 the ground ; so he started in the well-planted 
 approach, pricked his ears, backed, and, when a 
 gentle breeze at length caused the branches to flicker 
 about, he fairly set off in a panic. If we had en- 
 covmtered so terrifying and unusual an object as 
 another tree, almost twenty feet high, in any more 
 dangerous part of our drive, the consequences would 
 probably have been fatal ; but no successor having 
 appeared within ten miles, our Caithness quadruped 
 had time to compose his nerves, after witnessing so 
 extraordinary a phenomenon. 
 
 A celebrated tide runs near Barrogill Castle, 
 called "The merry men of Mey," very noisy and 
 obstreperous indeed, but no subject of merriment to 
 vessels, as they have to go off their track many 
 leagues sometimes to avoid the vortex, and, when 
 caught, are swept back on a stream, like the rapids 
 of a rapid river. This is said to have been the scene 
 of Grey's " Fatal Sisters," translated from the Norse 
 tongue. 
 
 Now the storm begins to lower, 
 (Haste, the loom of Hell prepare.) 
 Iron sleet of arrowy shower, 
 Hurtles in the darken'd air. 
 
60 BARROGILL CASTLE. 
 
 When about to leave Caithness, we discovered 
 that the only post-chaise in this county had been 
 already bespoke to act in the capacity of hearse at 
 a funeral, which seemed to me like one of Harle- 
 quin's transformations. That this useful vehicle 
 might have time to be altered and dressed for the 
 melancholy occasion, and that the one only pair of 
 post-horses might have leisure to rest, we hastened 
 our journey, and with difficulty obtained leave to 
 hire it ; so I have at last been actually reduced to 
 travel, like Miss Pratt, in a hearse ! How multifa- 
 rious are the duties of this old chaise ! — the four 
 wheels must be all running off sometimes in differ- 
 ent directions ! All the happy pairs in the county 
 probably make their wedding excursion in it, if 
 they make one at all, — it takes the Doctor to his 
 patients, the boys to their school, sportsmen to the 
 moors, guests out to dinner, and the dead to their 
 last resting-place ! The horses, too, once probably, 
 grandees in a well-groomed stable, giving some old 
 dowager her daily airing, or sharing the labour of 
 a dozen other hunters, are now reduced to be ser- 
 vants of all work, summoned at every hour of the 
 night or day, on every occasion of business, pleasure, 
 profit, or loss, and bound to be always, like soldiers 
 when they enlist, " free, able, and willing." 
 
 One of the most amusing stories of smuggling 
 I know, took place at Barrogill Castle, when the 
 
BARROGILL CASTLE. 61 
 
 late Lord Dulfus resided there as guardian to the 
 late Earl of Caithness. Having clandestinely im- 
 ported sixty hogsheads of claret for his own private 
 drinking, Lord Duffus thought it might be unsafe to 
 lodge them all in the house; therefore he built 
 fifty -eight of them up under so enormous a peat- 
 stack, that it became the astonishment and admira- 
 tion of the whole neighbourhood. He then carried 
 the remaining two hogsheads into Barrogill Gastle, 
 and wrote an anonymous information against him- 
 self to the excise-officer at Thurso, who hurried 
 over immediately to investigate the case. Lord 
 DufFus received him as a friend, cordially invited 
 him to dinner, whispered confidentially that he could 
 give him a capital bottle of claret, and after dinner, 
 when the worthy man was nearly half seas over, 
 showed him the two hogsheads, and said they were 
 scarcely worth seizing, but he hoped his friend 
 would return often, as long as they lasted, and share 
 the last drop with him; after which they shook 
 hands, and exit in mutual good humour. 
 
JOURNAL 
 
 OF A 
 
 TWO DAYS' RESIDENCE IN SHETLAND, 
 
 FULL, TRUE, AND PARTICULAR ACCOUNT OF THE 
 
 HABITS, MANNERS, AND LANGUAGE OF THE 
 
 NATIVES, THEIR DRESS, APPEARANCE, 
 
 AND CUSTOMS j 
 
 NEW AND ORIGINAL DISCOVERIES RESPECTING THE GEOGRAPHY, 
 
 ASTRONOMY, NATURAL HISTORY, AND GEOLOGICAL 
 
 STRUCTURE OF THOSE ISLANDS ; 
 
 WITH A DETAILED ACCOUNT OF THEIR HISTORY, PAST, 
 PRESENT, AND TO COME. 
 
 Dedicated to the Royal Society. 
 
 "A most elaborate and deeply scientific work." — Philosophical Journal. 
 '• VVe earnestly recouuuend tins adniirahle voluiae to all readers who wish 
 
 for profound views and erudite research." — SciENTiFiC Akgus. 
 "We cannot but wish that Sir Isaac Newton and Sir Joseph Banks had 
 
 lived to see this day !" — Populak Phiiosopher. 
 
 Ask Where's the north'!— at York 'tis on the Tweed— 
 
 In Scolland, at the Orcades, — and there, 
 
 At Greenland, Zenibla, or, I can't tell where. 
 
 My DEAR Cousin, — Every new country is inter- 
 esting to visit once, though the real compHment is, 
 as you say, to go a second time. I hke to ascertain 
 with my own eyes, what is, or is not worth seeing 
 in it, — whether it be better or worse than my own — 
 
SHETLAND. 63 
 
 how people set about being happy there, and how 
 they succeed. At one time I expected quite as 
 much to visit the moon as the Shetland islands, but 
 I have lately indulged a sort of hopeless wish to 
 venture on a voyage of discovery towards the ex- 
 treme verge of her Majesty's dominions, that I 
 might pass the longest day of my hfe in that country 
 where two days are turned into one, by having no 
 intervenino; nio;ht. 
 
 Islands are troublesome articles to deal with, 
 especially as I have not the courage of a butterfly 
 by steam, therefore it was a considerable exertion 
 the first time I invited myself to go, but after talking- 
 it over with myself during some weeks, it became a 
 matter of course, that wind and weather permitting, or 
 even not permitting ! the experiment should be tried ; 
 consequently one cold stormy morning, to my own 
 great astonishment, we found ourselves on board 
 the Sovereign, a fine, large, well-grown steam-boat, 
 which touches at Wick once a week, in full boil, on 
 its route from Leith to Lerwick, and picks up all 
 those courageous passengers who may have sum- 
 moned up resolution and enterprise enough to ven- 
 ture almost within sight of the north pole. 
 
 Nearly every gentleman before whom I have 
 happened to mention Shetland during the last year 
 or two, has long intended to take a glimpse of these 
 stormy isles, but while swarms and clouds of travel- 
 
64 SHETLAND. 
 
 lers are migrating to the most unattainable foreign 
 districts, our own northern Archipelago remains un- 
 known and unnoticed, wasting its sweets, if it has 
 any, on the desert air, and scarcely upon visiting 
 terms with a single individual. Pray, bring your 
 telescope here some day, and try, as we are doing, 
 to get a distant peep of Iceland. 
 
 Travellers are not seen to much advantage in 
 steam-boat costume, and it is certainly odd that, 
 wherever a crowd is assembled in a morning, they 
 all look vulgar ; therefore we glanced round at the 
 mob of miscellaneous beings assembled on deck, all 
 shivering, in cloaks of every shape, size, and colour, 
 little hoping to meet with the very agreeable so- 
 ciety which we soon afterwards discovered on board, 
 or indeed with any thing that could be called so- 
 ciety at all. 
 
 The General Assembly of Scotland having re- 
 cently dispersed, we found a ship-load of divines re- 
 turning to their congregations in the north, some 
 apparently clever and eccentric, some extra-eccen- 
 tric, and others pious, learned, and communicative, 
 who added all that was in their power, and that 
 was a great deal, to the pleasure of our voyage, and 
 almost eveiy one of whom gave us most cordial in- 
 vitations to their fire-sides and manses in Shetland. 
 Mr. Hamilton, the very talented and agreeable in- 
 cumbent of Brassay, near Lerwick, became a per^ 
 
SHETLAND. 65 
 
 feet encyclopedia of information and entertainment 
 as long as we continued in the ultra-north, and Mr. 
 Watson of North Yell afforded us many curious de- 
 tails respecting his parish and people. He officiates 
 in two churches, divided by a broad and dangerous 
 ferry, where frequently on Sunday six rowers have 
 endeavoured in vain to carry him across, but after 
 pulling incessantly for three or four hours, and com- 
 ing in sight of his church and the assembled con- 
 gregation, he has been obliged to relinquish all 
 hope of landing, while it was about equally difficult 
 to reach the opposite shore. One of Mr. Watson's 
 elders, who had to travel eight Shetland miles, a 
 very vague measurement, besides crossing a wide 
 ferry before getting to church, was so exceedingly 
 zealous that never during many years did he once 
 miss divine service ! This venerable Christian was 
 unfortunately drowned lately while trying to save 
 the crew of another boat lost near his own house. 
 Mr. Watson says the people of Shetland, in general, 
 testify an extreme value for public ordinances, and 
 though his parish consists of only eight hundred per- 
 sons, he generally averages at the sacrament about 
 three hundred and fifty communicants. They are 
 all so indigent that the collection at church seldom 
 exceeds threepence ! 
 
 The chief or only wealth of Shetland arises from 
 the fisheries, and from the manufacture of wool, 
 6* 
 
66 SHETLAND. 
 
 which is of so very superior a quality that stockings 
 are knitted by thousands and tens of thousands in 
 these islands, at all prices, and are sometimes fine 
 enough to be sold for two guineas a pair ! I find 
 it registered in the Rev. Mr. Sands' account of his 
 own parish Tingwall, near Lerwick, that "formerly 
 the stockings of Shetland were sent to Holland, but 
 the difference of their value, since they found their 
 way to other markets, particularly the English, is 
 said to be nearly equal to the land-rent of the coun- 
 tiy, and this difference must be ascribed to the pat- 
 riotic and benevolent exertions of Sir John Sin- 
 clair." During the eighty years of my father's life, 
 he published one hundred and six volumes, and 
 three hundred and sixty-seven pamphlets, written 
 with the one all-prevailing desire to benefit his na- 
 tive country, and while he has been called from his 
 labours to that rest which remaineth for the people 
 of God, it is pleasing in every part of Scotland to 
 trace the success of so enterprising and persevering 
 a patriot. The universal diffusion of English sheep 
 over our native hills, was an era in our national 
 history, and has nearly doubled the value of many 
 Highland properties, where, owing to ignorance 
 and mismanagement, the Scottish wool had become 
 so exceedingly deteriorated and scarce, that, on an 
 average, four millions of pounds had to be annu- 
 ally imported from Spain. In consequence of some 
 
SHETLAND. ' 67 
 
 adA^antageous discoveries respecting wool, commu- 
 nicated by my father to the Highland Society, a 
 board of inquiry was instantly formed, of which he 
 became chairman, sparing neither time nor expense 
 to render it efficient, and presenting to the com- 
 mittee a hundred sheep, which he had collected from 
 the royal flocks of France, from Spain, Shetland, 
 and England, to the latter of which he gave that 
 name, now so universally known of " Cheviot 
 sheep." He travelled in person to every county 
 where the growth of wool was peculiarly successful, 
 and at an inn twelve miles from Edinburgh, he gave 
 the first sheep-shearing festival which had ever 
 taken place in Great Britain, where a multitude of 
 persons from all countries sat down to a collation, 
 each adorned with pastoral badges and emblems, 
 and where one of the amusements consisted in seeing 
 wool which had been shorn in the morning, spun, 
 dyed, wove, and formed into a coat during a single 
 day. 
 
 Nothins: in D'Israeli's Curiosities of Literature 
 can be more singular than the origin, progress, and 
 termination of my father's single-handed efforts to 
 collect the Statistical Account of Scotland, a work 
 for which no precedent existed in the world, as 
 even the veiy word " Statistics" was invented by 
 himself, a fact recorded in the old contemporaiy 
 edition of Walker's Dictionaiy, who remarks that 
 
68 SHETLAND. 
 
 no name had previously existed for a science now so 
 generally understood. To anatomize the society, 
 population, history, manufactures, and antiquities of 
 a great nation, required enterprise, perseverance, 
 and even enthusiasm ; but unintimidated by obsta- 
 cles, he addressed separate letters to one thousand 
 clergymen, suggesting his plan and requesting their 
 aid. To some of the more indolent he wrote three- 
 and-twenty times, besides applying to their patrons 
 and friends, to gain their co-operation, and the last 
 effort he made to arouse any individual's exertion 
 was by forwarding him an epistle written with red 
 ink, explaining that this was a final attempt to rouse 
 his patriotism. After receiving many thousand let- 
 ters, he employed missionaries at liis own expense 
 to collect the details of such parishes as were not 
 reported by the clergy, and wrote some himself. 
 In the course of seven years this arduous work was 
 completed, after which the author used his influence 
 to obtain for a reward, nothing personal to himself, 
 but a grant from government, to the " Society for 
 the sons of the clergy," of j£2000, and presented 
 besides to that useful institution, the copyright and 
 whole pecuniary benefit of his labours. To himself 
 and his family remained only the gratification of 
 witnessing his entire success, and the honour which 
 he deserved for so vast and patriotic an undertaking. 
 Adam Smith remarks that there are three ways of 
 
SHETLAND. 69 
 
 pursuing fame. " Those who wish to enjoy celeb- 
 rity, whether they deserve it or not, — those who 
 seek to deserve, but care not to enjoy it, — and those," 
 like my father, " who seek both to deserve and to 
 enjoy it." Few ever loved his country more, — few 
 ever laboured as perseveringly to serve it, — and few 
 ever more deeply valued its approbation. When 
 age and infirmity precluded the possibility of new 
 exertions, he often looked back on the difficulties so 
 laboriously surmounted in preparing the Statistical 
 Account of Scotland, with a pleasing consciousness 
 of having served his country so essentially. Even 
 when verging towards the grave, and turning his 
 thoughts to a better world, he heard with satisfaction, 
 though not consulted on the subject, that a second 
 edition of this great work was in progress. Before 
 long, volume after volume appeared, containing no 
 meed of praise for his exertions ! no tribute of grati- 
 tude for his liberality ! no mention even of his name ! 
 A great edifice had been raised, and the original 
 architect, who planned the whole, incurred the ex- 
 pense, engaged the artisans, obtained a reward for 
 their labours, and generously claimed no recompense 
 for himself, was now entirely overlooked, but never- 
 theless could he have foreseen the end from the be- 
 ginning, his strong impulse to do good as he had 
 opportunity, would still have prevailed. From that 
 period, my father calmly but indignantly ceased to 
 
70 SHETLAND. 
 
 mention a subject once the soui'ce of so much plea- 
 sure, and latterly we avoided any allusion to it. In 
 the volume w^hich came out immediately after my 
 father's decease, a cold, late, and business-like ac- 
 knowledgment of his name appeared, but as no 
 copy of the new edition is forwarded to his family, 
 I did not borrow one to peruse it. The heart that 
 should have been cheered, and the eye that should 
 have been brightened by that page, w^ere at rest for 
 ever, and even if ample justice had been awarded, 
 the praise that was due could have mattered little 
 then to him who was beyond its reach, or to us who 
 valued it only for his sake. 
 
 The Shetland accent is pecuharly pleasing, but 
 still retains so strong a tinge of Norse, that the 
 somewhat foreign pronunciation led me to imagine 
 several of the gentlemen who spoke to us, were 
 either Frenchmen, Danes, or even Irish, much more 
 than Scotchmen. A rumour had reached us before 
 embarking in the steam-boat, that a great man was 
 on board ! No less a personage than the Danish 
 governor of the Feroe Islands, son ofthe prime min- 
 ister of Denmark ! His father had been ambassador 
 from that Court to England, a man of great abilities 
 and intelligence, who had educated our compagnon 
 de voyage with great care, and bestowed on him 
 this very inadequate appointment, merely from a 
 desire to improve that frozen region of ice-bergs 
 and whales. 
 
SHETLAND. 71 
 
 The governor of Feroe, Mr. Ployen, had with 
 great difficulty obtained permission from his own 
 rulers to travel in Scotland, and had brought a 
 large detachment of his people to study agriculture, 
 in what region of the earth do you suppose ? In 
 Shetland ! ! There the spade husbandry, wooden 
 harrows, stone querns, and little hand-mills, are a 
 centui-y, at least, behind East Lothian, and the 
 world in general ! Miss Edgeworth's Farmer Good- 
 enough, would have seen little cause to complain 
 of modern innovations, where Captain Hay's pa- 
 tent plough has never yet been heard of, and several 
 genuine Scandinavian implements of husbandry are 
 still in fashion, but " parmi les aveugles, un borgne 
 est roi /^ and the Shetlanders may, perhaps, be 
 some steps in advance of their more northern neigh- 
 bours. 
 
 Having no small curiosity to see Mr. Ployen and 
 suite, we hastened down to dinner, more eagerly 
 desirous to satisfy our cm-iosity than our appetite, 
 and I was considerably entertained to see the Cap- 
 tain ceremoniously place his Danish guest on his 
 right hand, and treat him, during the banquet, as 
 nearly with royal honours, as the small cabin of our 
 floating palace could admit, while the governor 
 himself seemed exceedingly bored at exciting so 
 much notice. 
 
 I have seldom encountered a more entertaining. 
 
72 SHETLAND. 
 
 frank, well informed foreigner, than Mr. Ployen, a 
 tall, fair, and very dignified looking personage, who 
 spoke English as well as any native,— or better, — 
 and who seemed anxious to make the conversation 
 a means of giving and receiving as much informa- 
 tion as possible. When he sketched a lively graphic 
 description of his own desolate regions at Feroe, I 
 began to fancy it would be quite impossible ever to 
 get far enough north, as Shetland seemed a mere 
 every-day affair in comparison of the immeasurable 
 precipices now described, when he laughingly con- 
 cluded his picture by saying, that we estimated the 
 height of our shore by hundreds of feet, and he by 
 thousands ! I must some day explore a north-west 
 passage for myself, and measure the rocks of Feroe. 
 Sumburgh-head, in Shetland, rises about eight 
 hundred feet abruptly out of the ocean, and at North 
 Yell, the iron-bound coast, stretching forty miles 
 along the shore, forms a gigantic barrier of tower- 
 ing rocks, as if the angry, ceaseless billows of the 
 great Atlantic had worn down, and bent the very 
 earth by their weight. What a mere insect man 
 appears in such scenes ; but here would be a place 
 for geologists to chip down the world with their 
 hammers, and to frame half-a-dozen theories, or to 
 draw from the rocks themselves a history of their 
 origin. In some parts of Scotland, the characters 
 of estates were anciently carved in Gaelic on the 
 
SHETLAND. 73 
 
 rocks, and here would have been abundant space 
 for such dociunents. A person ignorant of the law 
 once mentioned, that a gentleman had proved his 
 claim to an estate, and on being asked in what 
 way, confidently replied, "He has carved it on 
 stone!" 
 
 While sitting at dinner in the cabin, we heard 
 many interesting anecdotes of the dangers encoun- 
 tered by fowlers in scaling the rocks of Shetland 
 and Feroe, where fatal accidents are so frequent, 
 that the people sometimes say to each other, " Your 
 grandfather fell, your father fell, and you must fol- 
 low too." Others boast over their companions, say- 
 ing, " Your father died in his bed, but mine went 
 off like a man !" 
 
 The common mode of rifling the birds' nest is, 
 for the fowlers to suspend themselves over a beet- 
 ling cliff of many hundred feet, merely by a single 
 rope forty or fifty fathoms long, which is so fretted 
 and hacked by the sharp edges of the rock, that it 
 occasionally breaks, precipitating the unfortunate 
 adventurer firom so great a height, that the body, 
 when found, sometimes retains scarcely a vestige of 
 ever having been human. From habit, they be- 
 come so reckless of danger, however, that frequently 
 more than one descends by the same rope, though I 
 scarcely know any occasion when it would seem 
 more desirable to have two strings to our bow. 
 7 
 
74 SHETLAND. 
 
 Captain Philips mentioned, that some time since, 
 a father and two sons were suspended in this way 
 over a deep chasm, when the youth who hung up- 
 permost hastily told his brother that the rope was 
 breaking, therefore it could no longer support them 
 all, desiring him to cut off the low^er end, on which 
 their father depended. The young man indignantly 
 refused thus to consign his father to death, upon 
 which his brother, without another moment's hesi- 
 tation, divided the rope below himself, precipitating 
 his father and brother both to instant destruction ! 
 We had an eager discussion, after hearing this 
 shocking story, whether it was possible to have 
 acted better than the amiable son who fell a sacri- 
 fice to duty and affection, during which Captain 
 Philips suggested, that he might have leaped off the 
 rope, and left his father to be preserved ! This was 
 a flight of generosity beyond the imagination of any 
 one else, and we received it with great approbation. 
 Indeed, w^e could scarcely have applauded him more, 
 if.the worthy Captain had actually taken the leap 
 h^oself. 
 
 A succession of similar stories ensued, all tend- 
 in ^ to prove that the Shetland rockmen are fit to be 
 rr e-dancers at Astley's ; but nothing interested me 
 mo^e than hearing a description of the cradle at 
 Noss. It was formed by a celebrated chmber from 
 the Isle of Fowlar, who heard, that off the point at 
 
SHETLAND. 75 
 
 Noss, a detached perpendicular pillar stood one 
 hundred and sixty feet high, and being perfectly 
 aloof from the shore, was considered quite inaccessi- 
 ble. Determined to do the impossible, and establish 
 his fame for pre-eminence on the rocks, besides 
 being bribed with the promise of a cow if successful, 
 he with great difficulty scrambled from a boat to the 
 summit of this lofty point, where he fixed a pulley, 
 and suspended a basket, which could be drawn 
 across to the mainland, carrying sheep or men in 
 comparative safety over a chasm sixty yards wide, 
 and four hundred feet deep. Fancy yourself per- 
 forming an excursion, in this way, between the top 
 of St Paul's and the monument : but that is not 
 half high enough ! Where shall we place you 
 then 1 Suppose yourself swinging in an arm chair 
 between the summit of Snowdon, and the peak of 
 Cader Idris ! After this curious enterprise had been 
 successfully achieved, the poor man forgetting how 
 much more difficult it is to go safely down than to 
 ascend a precipice, unfortunately did not take ad- 
 vantage of his own spider -like bridge, but in trvirig 
 to ^regain the boat, his foot slipped, and he ^ell 
 headlong down, where his body was never q^en 
 again ! a hero dying in the arms of victory. 
 
 The Governor mentioned, that lately at Fc^e, 
 a fowler descended safely by the usual conveyance 
 of a rope, but when about to be drawn up again, 
 
76 SHETLAND. 
 
 owing to some awkward entanglement, he arrived 
 at the surface with his feet upwards. His alarmed 
 friends thought his head had been cut off, and felt 
 so relieved to discover their mistake, that the whole 
 party burst into a simultaneous peal of laughter, 
 while the adventurer was very glad he had any face 
 to put on the matter at all, and laughed heartily 
 also. 
 
 The upper part of these cliffs generally over- 
 hangs the base ; therefore the rockmen, when desi- 
 rous to obtain -a footing, are obliged to swing them- 
 selves many yards out in the air, that the re-action 
 may shoot them back in contact with the precipice, 
 when they instantly cling to any little projection 
 that offers, and, after landing on it, anchor the end 
 of their rope to a stone, and proceed with a small 
 hand-net, stretched on a hoop, to spoon the eggs out 
 of their nests, depositing them carefully in a sack 
 which they carry behind ; and when the unlucky 
 bird sees her loss inevitable, by a curious instinct 
 she often pushes out the egg to save herself. An 
 enterprising fowler, standing on a projection once, 
 with a sheer precipice both above and below him 
 of several hundred feet, observed the end of his rope 
 become suddenly disengaged from its moorings, and 
 s^^^ng like a pendulum far into the distant space. If 
 it escaped entirely away, he knew that death, either 
 by a fall, or by the slower and more dreadful pro- 
 
SHETLA?«). 77 
 
 cess of starvation, must become inevitable ; there- 
 fore, perceiving that the rope, before it finally set- 
 tled, would swing once more almost within his grasp, 
 he earnestly watched the moment of its return, made 
 a desperate spiing forward in the air, clutched it in 
 his hand, and was saved. 
 
 Travellers are in a perplexing predicament when 
 relating what they see or hear, because every thing 
 is either so common-place as to be scarcely worth 
 mentioning, or so extraordinary, as to be quite be- 
 yond belief; and your credulity will take leave of 
 me altogether if I continue on my tight-rope any 
 longer. I shall merely describe one thing which 
 amused and astonished me exceedingly. Our steam- 
 boat passed near Coppensha, one of the Orkneys, 
 which presents a gigantic barricade of rocks, inhab- 
 ited by millions of birds, which we saw, though I 
 had not time to count them, sitting in rows like 
 charity children, with black heads and white tippets, 
 ranged along every crevice in the cliffs. Captain 
 Philips caused several guns to be fired, when an 
 uproarious noise ensued, which can be compared to 
 nothing but the hurraing of a whole army. It 
 seemed like a long loud roar, accompanied by the 
 echoing and re-echoing of guns, — a whole platoon 
 of cannon, till at length I fancied that the commotion 
 could scarcely have been more deafening from the 
 mob and artillery of London on the day of Her 
 
78 SHETLAND. 
 
 Majesty's coronation. Above, below, and around, 
 the sea, air, and rocks seemed all one living mass of 
 birds, screaming at the full pitch of their voices, 
 rushing through the air, careering to the very clouds, 
 flickering in circles over-head, zig-zagging all 
 round us, and then dropping like a shower into the 
 ocean. 
 
 Nothing in the way of animal life ever amazed 
 me so much ! I wonder if any one on earth can 
 imagine it ? — no ! certainly not ! seeing is believing, 
 and nothing else will help you. When I thought 
 how many fish must be necessary to feed so count- 
 less a colony of feathered mariners, the miracle 
 seemed greater still. The poor sillocks and herrings 
 must have a sad time of it ! Shetland is the metro- 
 polis of birds, and the greatest ornithologist might 
 weary himself here. In this cloud of living creatures 
 are included kitty-wakes, cormorants, sea-larks, 
 gulls, white and black scarfs, sea-parrots, maws, 
 and a species of puffin, commonly called lyres, or, 
 as the natives pronounce them, " lawyers !" It 
 would occasion rather a sensation in the Parliament 
 House to hear how coolly the Shetlanders mention 
 having shot a brace of lawyers in a morning ! We 
 could ill afford them a battu in Edinbursfh ! 
 
 Seals and otters abound on this coast, but I did 
 not observe a single mermaid, though these are the 
 bays where Sir Joseph Banks advised my father to 
 
SHETLAND. 79 
 
 catch them, using for bait, a looking-glass and 
 comb ! Many interesting and " authentic !" stories 
 are told here of mermen and merwomen, which 
 would amuse you exceedingly, therefore, pray mus- 
 ter up a considerable stock of credulity, and listen. 
 Far below the region of fishes, these merladies and 
 gentlemen, who are of supernatm-al beauty, exist in 
 an atmosphere of their own, in which they seem 
 able to live with very tolerable comfort in coral 
 palaces, and sleeping on beds of oysters. When de- 
 sirous to pay us a visit in the upper regions, they have 
 power to enter the skin of any amphibious animal, 
 and shoot through the water, but no son or daugh- 
 ter of the ocean can borrow more than one sea- 
 dress of this kind for his own particular use, there- 
 fore, if the garb should be mislaid on our shores, he 
 never can return to his submarine country and 
 friends. A Shetlander once having found an empty 
 seal skin on the shore, took it home and kept it in 
 his possession. Soon after, he met the most lovely- 
 being who ever stepped on the earth, wringing her 
 hands with distress, and loudly lamenting that hav- 
 ing lost her sea-dress, she must remain for ever on 
 the earth. The Shetlander having fallen in love at 
 first sight, said not a syllable about finding this pre- 
 cious treasure, but made his proposals, and offered to 
 take her for better or for worse, as his future wife ! 
 The merlady, though not, as we know, much a 
 
80 SHETLAND. 
 
 woman of the world, veiy prudently accepted this 
 offer ! I never heard what the settlements were, 
 but they lived very happily for some years, till one 
 day, when the green-haired bride unexpectedly dis- 
 covered her own long-lost seal skin, and instantly 
 putting it on, she took a hasty farewell of every 
 body, and ran towards the shore. Her husband flew 
 out in pursuit of her, but in vain ! She sprung from 
 point to point, and from rock to rock, till at length 
 bounding into the ocean, she disappeared for ever, 
 leaving the worthy man, her husband, perfectly 
 planet-struck and inconsolable on the shore ! 
 
 In some of those islands, the rent is paid, as it is 
 also at St. Kilda, in feathers, which are sold for 
 ninepence per pound ; and one of my father's Caith- 
 ness farms had a clause in the lease, entitling him 
 to a pepper-corn rent of 1000 sea-birds' eggs every 
 year, though he never levied the tax. 
 
 The governor of Feroe mentioned, that, during 
 their fishing-season, his coast is so surrounded by 
 shoals of bottle-nosed whales, that the seamen go 
 out in a long array of boats, and drive them, like 
 flocks of sheep, towards the shore. When this cav- 
 alcade approaches land, a dreadful scene of carnage 
 ensues, while the terrified monsters become infuri- 
 ated, and, in attempting to escape, they frequently 
 upset one or two boats. The men become nearly 
 frantic with excitement on these occasions, the 
 
KIRKWALL. 81 
 
 wounded animals bellow with pain, the ocean is 
 dyed red with blood, and troops of sea-gulls, which 
 always attend on these occasions, become so stained 
 with gore, that, before taking wing to depart, they 
 appear to be birds of scarlet plumage. 
 
 Escorted in great state by the governor of Feroe 
 
 and suite, A and I landed at Kirkwall, Captain 
 
 Philips having granted us leave of absence for an 
 hour and three quarters, but his one hour shrunk 
 into a miserably short one, and his three quarters 
 became nothing at all, as we were soon peremp- 
 torily summoned back on the shortest notice, by an 
 arbitrary little bell, rung most impatiently before 
 one-half our curiosity had been gratified. Travel- 
 lers who rashly apprentice themselves to a steam- 
 boat for a certain number of days, must expect less 
 attention to the picturesque than to the station most 
 convenient for taking in coals, or letting out pas- 
 sengers, as we experienced on this lamentable oc- 
 casion. 
 
 The very ancient and interesting cathedral of 
 Kirkwall, dedicated to St. Magnus, was begun 
 seven centuries ago, by Ronald, Earl of Orkney. 
 It is the most perfectly preserved in Scotland, and 
 looks almost as large as the whole city put together. 
 You would fancy it an arrival from Brobdignag 
 among the Liliputian buildings around, and the 
 whole structure would do honour to any Episcopal 
 
82 KIRKWALL. 
 
 diocese in England, being in truth a sort of country 
 cousin to Worcester Cathedral, as they are in a sim- 
 ilar style of architecture, though the masonry of 
 Kirkwall is coarser, and the plan scarcely so digni- 
 fied. It is wonderful that the poor inhabitants, who 
 could scarcely rear dwellings for themselves, should 
 produce so magnificent a pile for Divine worship ! 
 The roof is quite entire, but the lofty steeple was 
 most unfortunately struck down by lightning several 
 years ago, virhich causes a sad blank in the coup 
 d'oeil at first, though much architectural beauty still 
 remains. The long and solemn ranges of pillars 
 and cloisters inside have at length become so per- 
 fectly green with damp, that they appear like some 
 wonderful cave, over which the sea had broken for 
 ages. Indeed the celebrated cave at Flamborough- 
 head is not very unlike it, and certainly neither 
 more mouldy, nor more weather-stained. 
 
 We entered this hoary pile with feelings of pro- 
 found reverence and admiration, preparing our 
 minds for a solemn remembrance of the great men 
 and the eloquent divines who once frequented those 
 sacred walls, generation after generation, many of 
 whom lie side by side in the last long sleep of death. 
 The first tomb-stone which caught my attention was 
 exceedingly handsome, exhibiting a coat-of-arms 
 on one side, and bearing a long panegyrical inscrip- 
 tion on the other, While gazing at this impressive 
 
KIRKWALL. 83'" 
 
 memento with all that profound respect due to the 
 illustrious dead, our guide gravely informed us that 
 this tablet was raised in honour of the late dancing- 
 master at Kirkwall ! 
 
 Not far off, lie the venerated remains of our 
 illustrious Scottish historian, Laing, whose memory 
 is deserving of the utmost reverence and admiration 
 from all his countrymen; and a few steps distant 
 we were shown a curious tomb placed under a low 
 hea^y stone arch, like an ancient fire-place, which 
 was built in this peculiar form by special desire of 
 the person underneath, because an enemy had once 
 threatened to dance on his grave. 
 
 We discovered the tombs of Bishops Murray, 
 Stewart, and a whole conclave of reverend fathers, 
 their names, arms, and mitres carved in stone, and 
 surmounted by inscriptions, some too long to be 
 read, and others with a great deal to say which had 
 become totally illegible, though none were, I trust, 
 what Pope calls " sepulchral lies, our holy w^alls to 
 grace." The child we are told of, who saw nothing 
 in a church but laudatory inscriptions, made a most 
 natural mistake when he asked, " where all the bad 
 people were buried ?" 
 
 I was astonished at the trouble taken by our for- 
 eign friend, Mr. Ployen, to decipher every epitaph 
 in which there appeared generally more sentiment 
 than feeling ; but he seemed to have a remarkable 
 
84 KIRKWALL. 
 
 knowledge of heraldry, and being the fii'st Dane 
 who had recently invaded Scotland, he was evi- 
 dently anxious to claim for his country some credit 
 in the founding of this Cathedral. With the patri- 
 otic hope of producing evidence to prove its Danish 
 origin, he left not a crevice unexplored, so that 
 even a rat could scarcely have enjoyed its hole in 
 peace, but all in vain, — the Cathedral of Kirkwall 
 gave no sign ! 
 
 Mr. Ployen did not relish our saying, that the 
 Orkneys had been ceded to Scotland by the Danes, 
 but interrupted our discussion with a deprecating 
 bow and shrug, saying they were only mortgaged 
 for a small sum, and the money had since been ten- 
 dered by his government three times without suc- 
 cess. Rather an aw^kward transaction if true. 
 
 In the choir of this cathedral. Divine ser\ice is 
 yet performed, but the whole ancient edifice is soon 
 to be put on the retired list, and superseded by a 
 fine, vulgar, modern upstart, which is in full pro- 
 gress here. All that green baize and brass nails 
 can do is done, to look handsome, but I greatly pre- 
 fer the green mould and yellow rust of the old 
 school, and really would not grudge the good peo- 
 ple of Kirkwall a few coughs and rheumatisms 
 rather than let them desert this fine old fabric, 
 which has ornamented the world so long. 
 
 Mr. Ployen expressed much surprise on seeing 
 
KIRKWALL. 85 
 
 our square pews at church, with a table m the cen- 
 tre, saying it gave him the idea of our intending to 
 play at whist. No separation of seats was made 
 long ago in Scotland, and none is allowed now in 
 Denmark, where so strict an equality is preserved 
 in the house of God, that on one occasion a common 
 soldier found himself accidentally placed next to 
 the king. He hastily started up, but his majesty 
 stopped him, saying, " Stay, friend ! remember there 
 is no distinction here !" 
 
 The inhabitants of Kirkwall are intended never 
 to keep carriages, seeing a staircase runs across 
 their principal or only street, which is entirely 
 paved with large flags, and so narrow, that opposite 
 neighbours might almost shake hands from their 
 respective windows. Upwards of four thousand 
 women are employed in plaiting straw for bonnets 
 at Orkney, and the annual value of what they make 
 is averaged at j£30,000. Gii-ls of eight years old, 
 and even the very oldest men, can earn a Uvelihood 
 by this means ; and during the long winter even- 
 ings, little sociable parties of ten or twelve meet at 
 each other's houses, and work together, beguiling 
 the hours mth a snug gossip, and a cup of bohea. 
 
 The Castle of Orkney shelters one or two plane 
 
 trees cowering within the walls, and hanging out a 
 
 leaf or two, here and there, to prove that they are 
 
 alive, which is almost a questionable fact, even with 
 
 8 
 
86 KIRKWALL. 
 
 those few witnesses to attest it, and the country 
 round seemed clothed in sackcloth. The bishop's 
 " manse" has been very handsome in its day, though 
 now worn to rags, and the market place is neat and 
 extensive. 
 
 You may search round the world, and find 
 nothing more hopelessly ugly than the Isle of 
 Sanda, which Hes so perfectly flat and bare, that it 
 might be taken for the whale's back on which 
 Sinbad the sailor landed. The ground, from a 
 very short distance, becomes quite invisible, there- 
 fore the few houses we saw seemed floating on the 
 surface of the sea, and the people seemed all walk- 
 ing on the water. It gave me a better idea of the 
 deluge than any picture I ever saw. 
 
 An alteration was made respecting the light- 
 house here some time ago, which produced most 
 disastrous consequences. The station formerly was 
 at North Ronaldsha, more than three miles off, and 
 many foreign ships, consulting old charts, were mis- 
 led in their bearings, and totally lost, though such 
 events used not to be xmiversally deplored among 
 the Shetlanders formerly, when a stranded vessel 
 was considered quite as lawful a capture as a 
 stranded whale. One of our clerical friends men- 
 tioned, that some years ago three brothers sailed 
 from Hamburgh in different vessels on the same day, 
 and after cruising to various ports without meeting, 
 
KIRKWALL. 87 
 
 they were all wrecked on the shore of Sanda at the 
 same time, and their ships completely lost ! What 
 a melancholy rencontre they must have had on this 
 desolate and fatal coast ! 
 
 A Danish princess lies interred at our family 
 bmying-place in Caithness, who met with her death 
 under somewhat similar circumstances. She had 
 married the chief of the clan Gunn, who passed 
 himself off, at the court of Demnark, for being a 
 considerably greater man than he really was, and 
 when she became desirous at length to see the 
 splendid residence he had described himself to pos- 
 sess in Scotland, he gallantly insisted on preceding 
 her there, to make the most magnificent prepara- 
 tions, but no Caleb Balderstone being then on the 
 spot, he was put to his wit's end one evening, by 
 beholding a fine vessel in the distance, containing 
 his bride and her suite in full progress homewards. 
 In an agony of consternation, he caused false lights 
 to be hung out along the coast, the consequence of 
 which was that the ship foundered, and her body, 
 richly dressed in jewels, having been washed on 
 shore at Clythe, is buried there with all the splendid 
 decorations she wore. It was unfortunate for the 
 princess, that she did not see some such conclusive 
 reason for refusing Mr. Gunn, as Lady Penelope 
 Primrose in more modern times, who declined the 
 addresses of a gentleman belonging to that clan, 
 
88 KIRKWALL. 
 
 giving as an excuse that she could not tolerate the 
 idea of being called all her hfe " Lady Pen-Gun I" 
 Persons afflicted ^vith a name which admits of being 
 punned upon, must often wish, in desperation, that 
 some friend would leave them an estate, as an ex- 
 cuse for changing it. 
 
 Our Danish fellow-traveller was shocked beyond 
 expression at this tragical tale, and shrugged his 
 shoulders, till they nearly met over his head, on 
 hearing the catastrophe. I was amused at the un- 
 mitigated censure he bestowed on our country, for 
 allowing debtors a sanctuary within the precincts 
 of Holyrood Palace, where they enjoy unmolested 
 liberty to range through the park and hills around, 
 giving splendid entertainments, and receiving com- 
 pany, while the poor deluded creditors are in actual 
 starvation. As Paul Pry says, " I don't mean to 
 hint that there is any thing in it, only it seems odd !" 
 and we had very little to urge in defence of national 
 custom on this point. Mr. Hamilton mentioned that 
 the chief extravagance of his poor parishioners con- 
 sists in tea-drinking to the most marvellous excess, 
 and that those who are starving would rather pur- 
 chase tea than bread. You never heard of tee-total- 
 lers on so large a scale ! the indulgence amounts 
 almost to an absolute vice, and the Shetlanders must 
 positively establish a toast-and-water society im- 
 mediately. About je25j000 worth of bohea is an- 
 
KIRKWALL. 89 
 
 nually entered at the custom-house in Lerwick, be- 
 sides which, a great quantity is smuggled by Dutch 
 fishing-boats. One poor man in the parish of Bras- 
 say, who had the expensive infliction of a tea-drink- 
 ing wife, was cheated, by her secretly selling his 
 goods to obtain tea ! He was observed once to 
 purchase the same peck of meal three times over in 
 one week, being always assured that his children 
 had eaten it. A Highland laird once remarked, that 
 the Scotch peasantry were ruined by forsaking " the 
 good old porridge of their ancestors !" 
 
 Mr. Hamilton says, the kindness of all his very 
 poor people towards each other is astonishing. Like 
 the widow's cruize, their last mouthful is shared 
 with those who are more necessitous than themselves, 
 and no single individual will ever starve, unless the 
 whole population perish together. Poor and des-^ 
 titute as most of them are, he deprecated any plan 
 of assessment, because it would destroy all those 
 feelings of mutual sympathy and independence which 
 are the sole remaining comforts they possess. It 
 certainly is one of the deepest mysteries in this per^ 
 plexing world, what system is best for relieving in- 
 digence, because while our almighty Creator has 
 ordained, for wise and holy purposes, that the poor 
 shall be always on the earth, he has at the same 
 time laid a deep responsibility on the rich, to do the 
 veiy utmost which liberality and good sense can 
 8* 
 
90 KIRKWALL. 
 
 dictate, to relieve the weight of wo and painful 
 endurance laid on our suffering brethren. I beheve 
 it would be an act of mercy to sweep from the face 
 of the earth most of those large charitable institu- 
 tions which encumber it, except such as are for the 
 blind and the incurable. If a hospital were insti- 
 tuted, where every living being could receive, on 
 application, a dish of porridge, a flannel petticoat, 
 and a bed, there would probably be an end of all 
 exertion in the world. There must be, as a motive 
 to industry, the apprehension of that misery, which 
 it is nevertheless our business to relieve when it 
 comes, by encouraging and teaching lessons of pro- 
 vident economy. I know many places at present, 
 where industrious women can get no needle-work 
 at their own firesides, because they are so completely 
 under-sold by large institutions, in which the ex- 
 pense of house-rent and coals not being paid by 
 indi-vdduals, the work can be done much cheaper. 
 If a general distribution of clothes were made to the 
 poor, in three days more than half those gratis 
 wardrobes would be lodged at the pawnbroker's ; 
 and in considering the failings and defects of every 
 human scheme for the general advantage we can- 
 not but mournfully exclaim in the language of 
 Scripture, " Who will show us any good ?" The 
 two most eminent philanthropists in Scotland, Dr. 
 Chalmei"S and Dr. Alison, are completely opposed 
 
KIRKWALL. 91 
 
 in opinion respecting the most eligible plan for the 
 poor; but while we lament the difficulty of ascer- 
 taining what is best, nothing, at the same time, can 
 exonerate any Christian from anxiously studying 
 this important subject, and conscientiously expend- 
 ing time and money, according to his utmost ability, 
 and according to the best of a carefully formed 
 judgment, on the great Christian object of succour- 
 ing those whom our Divine Saviour has so solemnly 
 committed to our care, measuring the degree of our 
 devotion to Himself by our diligence in " feeding 
 the hungry, clothing the naked, and administering 
 to the sick ;" yet the great scriptural rule of letting 
 charity be so private, that the left hand shall not 
 know what the right hand is doing, would forbid 
 those great public establishments, which are in many 
 instances pernicious to the real interests of those 
 whom they are intended to benefit ; and the Bible 
 surely does not recognise or inculcate any general 
 and arbitrary assessment, which is to be deprecated, 
 for the sake of the poor, whom it would degrade and 
 demoralize, more than even for the wealthy, on 
 whom it would become every year more oppressive 
 and severe. 
 
 Mr. Hamilton mentioned, as an instance of the 
 generous feelings engendered by sympathy in dis- 
 tress, that, during the late scarcity, almost amount- 
 ing to a famine, an indigent old woman, ha^ung 
 
92 KIRKWALL. 
 
 been presented with a boll of meal, divided it 
 equally with her starving neighbours. It always 
 appears to me, that, in this world, those who have 
 real miseries bear them well, and those who have 
 none invent some petty grievance to grumble at ; 
 for some people endure the pleasures of life less 
 cheerfully than others bear its greatest calamities. 
 A very indigent girl, not long since, after suffering 
 all the saddest privations of poverty, met with an 
 unfortunate accident, which made it necessary for 
 the doctors to amputate her leg; but when they 
 cautiously imparted this frightful prospect, she 
 calmly replied, " Then I shall now have a leg the 
 less to endure cold from !" 
 
 It was grievous in many places to hear a most 
 heart-rending description of what the poor High- 
 landers suffered last season, when every thing short 
 of actual starvation was uncomplainingly undergone. 
 It lowered the value of the property so much to 
 have these circumstances known, that in some 
 places where estates were to be sold, the proprietor 
 forbid any application on behalf of his tenantry to 
 the relief Committee, in consequence of which, the 
 funds, raised by a liberal subscription, were, I fear, 
 very unequally distributed. 
 
 Another destitution, of yet greater importance, is 
 deeply deplored in Scotland, and became a subject 
 of serious discussion among the clergy as we ap- 
 
FAIR ISLE. 93 
 
 proached Fair Isle, a bright green spot, like an 
 emerald on the wide ocean. This place is quite a 
 little world in itself, covered with grass of a most 
 vivid and luxuriant verdure, but distant twenty- 
 four miles from the nearest shore, being exactly 
 half-way between Orkney and Shetland, — and there 
 four hundred of our countrymen live and die with- 
 out the instructions or consolations of any clergy- 
 man. The parish to which they belong lies in a 
 far distant island, whence Mr. Thomson, the incum- 
 bent, used to visit them once in a season, to per- 
 form all the marriages and christenings ; but now, 
 being eighty years of age, he is unable to encoun- 
 ter the fatigue of such a voy^age ; and it was men- 
 tioned, that the last time a clergyman arrived there, 
 several of the children requiring to be christened 
 were quite old and uninstructed, while one boy, 
 when the service was performed on himself, swore 
 most violently. The anxiety of these neglected 
 people for ministerial teaching is so extreme, that 
 they will laboriously row their boat any distance to 
 bring a preacher, and only ask their expenses for 
 taking him away, as it is considered ample remu- 
 neration for a voyage of fifty miles to hear a single 
 sermon ; and Mr. Watson of North Yell told us, 
 that once, when detained accidentally beyond Sun- 
 day the whole population crowded round him to 
 hear the gospel, and listened with fervent attention. 
 
94 FAIR ISLE. 
 
 Many rich people disapprove loudly of foreign 
 missions, confidently saying, " let charity begin at 
 home j" and for them here is a noble opportunity. 
 Neighbours and brethren of our own, who have lit- 
 tle to enjoy here, and no one to tell them of happi- 
 ness hereafter, suffer the most urgent want, while a 
 small subscription might supply the moderate wishes 
 of some resident clergyman, who would be wel- 
 comed with eager and grateful delight, bringing 
 them the knowledge which they seem all to be 
 thirsting for. 
 
 ' The deputations sent by charitable societies 
 travel sometimes now at a most preposterous ex- 
 pense. A lady assured me that once a barouch 
 and four arrived at her house in the Highlands, con- 
 taining four gentlemen, who requested leave to see 
 her pictures, and mentioned that they were a com- 
 mittee of clergymen firom England, collecting funds 
 for some religious object. Next day her old poul- 
 try-woman found several tracts scattered along the 
 approach, and this expedition cost several hundred 
 pounds, besides taking more than one clergyman 
 away from his own charge. This is a wide world, 
 in which there certainly is a great deal of good to 
 be done, but as none of us are like the tortoise, who 
 could carry the whole world on his own shoulders, 
 men who would really be useful must measure the 
 utmost extent of their own individual ability, and 
 
FAIR ISLE. 95 
 
 do the very most which is possible, without attempt- 
 ing more, and too many parish clergymen would 
 wander about like Wesley, who during fifty years 
 never travelled less than 4500 miles annually. It 
 was no bad jest on a certain itinerating rector of 
 this kind, who frequently transferred his own work 
 to a substitute, and preached in any parish rather 
 than his own, that he should be nicknamed " Eng- 
 land, because he expected every man to do his 
 duty." 
 
 These poor Shetlanders can afford no expensive 
 deputations, but the half of what was paid for that 
 one excursion which I have described, would place 
 them permanently under the blessed influences of 
 gospel light ; therefore I beg to move a resolution, 
 which you shall second, that our next foreign mis- 
 sion shall be established at Fair Isle. How much 
 I should like now to send round a plate for your 
 subscriptions ! In that case, a missionary need not 
 laboriously acquire any difficult language, nor has 
 he either a new religion to introduce or an old su- 
 perstition to destroy, while he would be gratefully 
 welcomed by a people, many of whom are mourn- 
 fully sensible of their unhappy religious privations, 
 and those who are not, need only the more urgently 
 to be made aware of them. We find more excite- 
 ment in sending to foreign heathens, — and they 
 require all we can do, — but there are heathens at 
 
96 FAIR ISLE. 
 
 home with a yet nearer claim to pity, though less 
 attractive to the fancy. I heard of a missionary 
 meeting lately, at which a Cherokee chief was pro- 
 duced, covered with tatooing and feathers, to pray 
 in his own unknown tongue, before a numerous 
 congregation, and to make a speech extempore, or 
 extrumpery as you say. Our poor Zetlanders would 
 have no chance in comparison, yet the time and 
 money expended by a foreign missionary on his 
 long journey, besides studying Malabar or Hindos- 
 tanee, and diving into the depths of Brahmin mytho- 
 logy, might be occupied with far more immediate 
 advantage if he set forth at once with the English 
 Bible in his hand, to teach a people nearly as igno- 
 rant as any barbarians, but far more walling to 
 learn ; and those who contributed to so desirable an 
 object, might hope to reap a harvest of immediate 
 success, and to be blessed by the prayers of many 
 whom they had assisted to rescue from darkness, 
 and to place in the marvellous light of the gospel. 
 
 In old times, the Duke of Medina Sidonia's ship, 
 the Invincible, commanding the Spanish Armada, 
 was wrecked off Fair Isle, when most of the crew, 
 amounting to two hundred men, landed in fishing- 
 boats. So numerous a swarm of guests would soon 
 have occasioned a famine, therefore the natives 
 murdered several, and hospitably entertained the 
 rest. If supernumerary guests could be lawfully 
 
FAIR ISLE. 97 
 
 disposed of in this way, what a massacre would take 
 place at some dinner parties we have seen. Both 
 hosts and visiters were rescued from approaching 
 starvation at last by the appearance of a ship from 
 Lerwick. On that occasion, the Duke appeared 
 near the shore to welcome his dehverers, in the 
 splendid costume of a Spanish nobleman, but Mal- 
 colm Sinclair, a sturdy Presbyterian, who had come 
 to entertain these foreign papists with all the rites 
 of hospitality, nevertheless remarked, on being in- 
 troduced to his distinguished guest, " I have seen 
 many prettier men hanged on the Burrow-muir !" 
 
 These long twilights are very enjoyable, and I 
 often wish that those who have more time than they 
 know how to use, could transfer a few superfluous 
 hours to those who find every day too short for half 
 what they wish to do ; but now that the stars are 
 lighting their lamps it is time for me to extinguish 
 mine. Since paper pillows are in fashion, you will 
 know how to dispose of too lengthy a letter, so I 
 must beware of being reduced to atoms, though it 
 would sound extremely civil to tell a long-winded 
 correspondent, that you never lie down without pla- 
 cing her letters under your head, — pray do not sub- 
 join that they put you to sleep. " We're a' noddin'." 
 
LERWICK. 
 
 I hope there's none offended 
 At me for telling this ; 
 For it was not intended 
 To be ta'en amiss. 
 
 Burns. 
 
 My dear Cousin, — Can this possibly be me at 
 Lerwick ! I begin to think it may not be a dream ! 
 You once said, in an extravagant moment, that any 
 letter was worth any money, so I hope you will re- 
 tain the same opinion, while I now dip the pen of 
 astonishment in the ink of veracity, that, since you 
 have never been sufficiently enterprising to travel 
 so far, you may become proud of being related to 
 any one who has, after hearing all our adventures 
 by flood and field. 
 
 "When a gentleman once mentioned having gone 
 to see the lion at Exeter 'Change, a friend satirically 
 inquired, " What did the lion think of you ?" rather 
 a perplexing question ; but I hope our lions here are 
 as much pleased with us as we are with them, see- 
 ing I am already more than rewarded for taking 
 this very long step towards the Arctic circle, and 
 planting my standard on the Castle of Lerwick. 
 
LERWICK. ' 99 
 
 A lady in Caithness, during one of our most un- 
 favourable summers, when every thing looked 
 brown, parched, and barren, became astonished to 
 hear a stranger talking in raptures about the richly 
 verdant thriving appearance of all the scenery in 
 our countiy. Of course she supposed him in jest, 
 till it turned out, on inquiry, that he was a native 
 of Shetland ! Certainly here we see little beside 
 grass and rocks, yet I admire beyond measure the 
 bold massy features of the landscape, glittering be- 
 neath a rising sun ; and there is something in it of 
 unadorned magnificence very striking to a stranger. 
 
 Lerwick is one of the oldest-looking towns I 
 ever remember to have inspected, and appears like 
 a small burlesque upon Venice, a range of houses 
 being drilled along the shore, all standing up to 
 their knees in water, while the sea washes six feet 
 deep on their foundations ; and instead of dark gon- 
 dolas, like coffins, floating about on the crystal 
 waves, we have light graceful skiffs gliding rapidly 
 along, bending their large white sails almost into 
 the siu-f 
 
 Last week sixty-three Dutch fishing-vessels 
 sailed at once out of this beautiful and commodious 
 harbour in the Sound of Brassay ; and residents 
 here all keep a boat instead of a carriage or cart, 
 being their only means of conveyance. No ^aman 
 but a Zetlander could manage these very small 
 
100 LERWICK. 
 
 canoes, like wherries from the Thames, with the 
 sails of most disproportionate magnitude ; but they 
 manoeuvre about in beautiful style, and the natives 
 seem all nearly amphibious, looking as if they sat 
 upon a dolphin, and holding the sail by a rope, 
 which is let fly the moment a blast rises, throwing 
 the sheet instantly at liberty. Accidents, however, 
 do happen only too frequently on these rough and 
 dangerous seas ; and it is a singular custom, that 
 drowned persons are always buried far from the 
 ocean, as if their spirits might still be disturbed by 
 the horrors attending their decease. Do you remem- 
 ber Lady , when she heard the sudden intelli- 
 gence that a gentleman had been accidentally 
 drowned in the river, close to her windows, instantly 
 inquired, as her very first question, " Was he hand- 
 some ?" 
 
 This is the first year that a tolerable inn has 
 been established at Lerwick, which is considered a 
 most remarkable era, and the style is about equal to 
 that on board a second-rate steam-boat, being con- 
 ducted by a most respectable landlord from East 
 Lothian. If any wealthy traveller, wishing to be 
 remarkably comfortable, had brought his own car- 
 riage and horses to Lerwick, he could not have 
 penetrated beyond the pier, and by no possible con- 
 trivance could his equipage have been available in 
 driving up to the hotel, which is in so narrow a 
 
LERWICK. 101 
 
 street, that A could easily have made a long 
 
 arm to touch the opposite house. I remember once 
 meeting an English lady going by steam to Staffa, 
 who said it was her intention immediately on land- 
 ing to order a post-chaise, and drive all round the 
 island, but neither there nor here would the plan be 
 very feasible, as not a wheel is stirring in the noise- 
 less streets. That peevish Mrs. , the morning 
 
 Vfter her arrival at Venice, complained that she had 
 been so disturbed by " the noise of carriages !" it was 
 impossible to close an eye ; but the streets at Ler- 
 wick are about equally carriageless, being a curious 
 assortment of courts, connected by lanes, and inter- 
 sected by stairs, one of which divides the High 
 Street quite across, and some of the streets are even 
 arched over at the top. 
 
 The only road in Shetland goes six miles to- 
 wards Scalloway Castle, and we were told that but 
 one gentleman ever had a carriage here, when he 
 used to drive his wife several times up and down 
 the w^hole distance, to give her an idea what a 
 journey means. It might be said of him, as your 
 old friend used to remark of her English relation, 
 with a look of great importance, " He is the rich- 
 est man in London ! he keeps his chariot !" The 
 short road to Scalloway is, like all short cuts, nearly 
 impassable, leading over a peat-bog, to be cleared 
 in a succession of leaps, but if any one -wishes to 
 9* 
 
102 LERWICK. 
 
 see a Shetland pony shine, he should mount on his 
 hack, the heavier the better, and perform a steeple 
 chase over all the chasms and vs^alls whichheinthe 
 way along the fine " corduroy road." Walking is, 
 of course, a most necessary accomplishment in this 
 country, where the shoes are made of materials so 
 very substantial, that an old gentleman used to say, 
 he wore in the morning three rows of nails on the 
 sole, but for full dress only two rows. 
 
 Some spirited proprietors projected great im- 
 provements here in road-making, and would have 
 summoned M'Adam himself from the deep ; but un- 
 luckily one landlord, a soi-disant baronet, has, with 
 short-sighted economy, put a spoke in all their 
 wheels, refusing to let a stone be broken unless 
 some very extravagant terms be conceded. This un- 
 fortunate impedhnent must be a great annoyance to 
 all the residents, and I wish they could be delivered 
 from it, " To be disposed of, — an old established 
 grievance, — going very cheap !" Nothing but an 
 act of Parliament can lay down a road here now, 
 such as had been projected, not that the ambition of 
 Shetland pointed to a mail with four horses, attended 
 by a guard blowing his horn, and flying round the 
 islands to carry tourists round Noss and Scalloway ; 
 but no one can tell what half a century may pro- 
 duce, and on my next excursion to this region, I 
 have promised to bring my chariot, while our friends 
 
LERWICK. 103 
 
 have undertaken to proAdde a suitable road. Per- 
 haps you may live to see some time a railway, like 
 a great iron hoop, surrounding Great Britain, wdth 
 the whole population cirding round at full speed, as 
 we see children at a fair, wheeling along on a " turn 
 about." 
 
 The introduction of a weekly steamboat to Shet- 
 land has begun a new era in this country. For- 
 merly all communication with other places became 
 so tedious and uncertain, that none could be safely 
 depended on. A few years since, one of the princi- 
 pal merchants here, who possessed more than twenty 
 ships of his own, became so anxious for letters, that 
 he sailed off to inquire for them personally at Edin- 
 burgh. There the postmaster objected to deliver 
 any, saying, it would be too great an advantage to 
 give him over the other mercantile houses at Ler- 
 wick, if he obtained his correspondence so prema- 
 turely, and it was not until after the greatest diffi- 
 culty, and legally proving his identity, that he could 
 obtain the packet. 
 
 The lower orders in Shetland seem rather be- 
 neath the middle size, especially when compared to 
 the tall Dutch skippers, stalking about in loose 
 tunics, high caps, and heavy wooden clogs, which 
 seem a most uncomfortable article of dress, being 
 excavated in a solid block of wood, as if the foot 
 had supernaturally forced its way in. We used to 
 
104 LERWICK. 
 
 read in the Richmond play bills, of a hornpipe to be 
 danced on the stage in wooden shoes, but here it 
 could neither be light nor fantastic, as these slippers, 
 liable to be shuffled off at every step, seem made to 
 impede walking. The Dutch sailors exchange 
 shoes with the Shetlanders for stockings, so that 
 their traffic is easily set on foot. 
 
 The sheep in these islands look like goats or 
 greyhounds, having long legs, and lank bodies, and 
 their colour is of that peculiar brown and blue 
 which the Shetland stockings usually exhibit. 
 Some are speckled of various hues, and go by the 
 name of Jacob's sheep, though not lineal descend- 
 ants of that flock. All the ladies here employ their 
 long evenings in knitting ; and even the hard-work- 
 ing women, when carrying on their backs the enor- 
 mous heavy " creels" which are used here instead 
 of carts, yet contrive to have a perpetual stocking 
 on hand. I met one cleanly dressed chatty old gos- 
 sip, the sort of looking personage who hobbles on 
 the stage at the beginning of a farce, exclaiming, 
 " How my old bones do ache !" and she assured me 
 with great exultation, that she manufactured a stock- 
 ing per day, and that every article she wore was 
 entirely of her own spinning. I liked to see her 
 honest pride, and if the gown had been French cam- 
 bric, she could scarcely have expected me to admire 
 it more. 
 
LERWICK. 105 
 
 Before inns were invented at Lerwick, the pro- 
 prietors and merchants kept open house for all 
 strangers without exception, and must often, I should 
 guess, have found occasion to look over the inven- 
 tory of their plate, when exercising such boundless 
 hospitality. A party of well-dressed, plausible 
 looking foreigners arrived here once, and having 
 previously ascertained the names and connections of 
 all the chief inhabitants, they passed muster during 
 several weeks, living at the principal house on the . 
 island. One Sunday, however, their hospitable host 
 was privately beckoned aside by a friend, who had 
 observed his companions in the pew at church, and 
 recognised them as a party of well-known black- 
 legs from Paris! He recommended their being 
 ejected from the house, in the most expeditious man- 
 ner possible, but their entertainer replied, with 
 characteristic liberality, that, *'■ though he would 
 now be on his guard against imposition, yet while 
 his guests continued to behave like gentlemen, he 
 would persevere in treating them as such." Previ- 
 ous to departing, the ungrateful visiters attempted 
 some swindling transactions, which were, of course, 
 counteracted, owing to this timely detection, and 
 they were opprobriously dismissed from Shetland ; 
 but, unfortimately, their schemes prospered better 
 in Orkney, where they afterwards cheated some 
 merchants to a large amount ; and it was a curious 
 
106 LERWICK. 
 
 termination of the whole affair, that upon leaving 
 Kirkwall, they very handsomely transmitted to the 
 parish clergyman £5 for the poor ! This was an 
 amusing sort of Robin Hood generosity, but some 
 who deem it right to refuse money collected for 
 charitable purposes, unless they approve of the 
 means by which it has been raised, would be rather 
 perplexed how to dispose of such a donation. 
 
 Among countless instances of peculiar hospi- 
 tality, it may be mentioned, that a Mr. Bruce re- 
 ceived into his house some years ago, forty Russian 
 shipwrecked sailors, maintained them during the 
 whole winter, and sent the entire crew, at his own 
 expense, back to their native country. He declined 
 receiving any recompense, but the Empress Cathe- 
 rine privately obtained an impression of his family 
 seal, sent it over land to China, and ordered a mag- 
 nificent dinner service of the finest porcelain to be 
 manufactured for him without delay. By some un- 
 fortunate oversight, the box containing this precious 
 gift was seized at the custom house, and sold to a 
 Mr. Reid, in whose possession it still remains, though 
 I cannot but grudge him every dinner he eats off it. 
 Mr. Bruce, while he lived, lighted a large fire every 
 winter night close to the shore, and had a barrel of 
 meal ready to be cooked into porridge, for distribu- 
 tion among any number of poor sailors visiting those 
 distant shores. They w^ere also allowed clean straw 
 
I.RRWICK. 107 
 
 to sleep on at night, when unable otherwise to pro- 
 cure a bed. 
 
 The gentry at Lerwick are still so •extremely- 
 kind to strangers, that oui- landlord should lock up 
 his guests, as the only chance of keeping any, or he 
 may perhaps be provoked at last to act like the inn- 
 keeper at Luss, who, finding himself nearly ruined 
 by the parish clergyman beguiling away all his 
 visiters, at last one night carried his sign to the 
 manse and nailed it over the door. 
 
 One of the most uncommon subjects for aston- 
 ishment, to a stranger, in Shetland, is, when he 
 first discovers the very near neighbourhood of every 
 gentleman's town and country house. The two are 
 generally within sight of each other ! We were 
 shown Mr. Mouat's elegant residence in Lerwick, 
 and looking full in its face, from the opposite side 
 of a narrow bay, stands^ Gardie House, his country- 
 seat ! It is a large, handsome, well-windowed 
 house, which seems to be staring about on every 
 side and wondering when the trees will come up. 
 Mr. Ogilvy has, what Robins the auctioneer would 
 call a most magnificent and desirable countiy resi- 
 dence, surrounded by gardens, terraces, and offices 
 on an extensive scale, but, by the help of a speaking- 
 trumpet, you might deliver a verbal message from 
 his drawing-room in the country to his drawing- 
 room in town ; and Mr. Hay's rural retreat is ex- 
 
108 LERWICK. 
 
 actly a ten minutes' walk from his mansion in Ler- 
 wick. All the principal families here make a 
 regular " flitting" every season, from town to 
 country, probably leaving their P P C cards for each 
 other, and, after taking a pathetic leave of the me- 
 tropolitan gayeties, set out, by easy stages, changing 
 horses as often as may be necessary, and plunging 
 into the wilderness of rural enjoyment vvdthin half a 
 mile. In London, those who have no estates often 
 close their front windows for the summer, and with- 
 draw out of sight, while etiquette forbids their being 
 visible in town, and to the Shetland gentiy the 
 change is scarcely gTeater. If a Court Circular be 
 ever established at Lerwick we shall read a list of 
 
 FASHIONABLE CHANGES. 
 
 Mr. Mouat, for the summer, from the north to 
 the south side of Lerwick Bay. Mr. Ogilvy and 
 family, half a mile west, for change of air. Mr. 
 Ployen, from Feroe, on a southern tour in Shetland 
 and Orkney ! 
 
 Fort Charlotte, at Lerwick, — an imposing old 
 fortification all bristling round with guns, — is in 
 good repair, and serves partly as a jail, where we 
 saw four youths under fourteen, one of whom was 
 a gentleman's son, confined in solitary cells, for a 
 burglary committed at Orkney, when they robbed 
 an old man of eighteenpence. They all maintained 
 
LERWICK. 109 
 
 that the money was immediately to have been re- 
 turned, as they merely intended a jest, but the law 
 does not understand such practical jokes. The 
 jailer's wife said, within hearing of the young crim- 
 inals, while tears started to her eyes, that she never 
 had seen more excellent boys, and pronounced their 
 panegyric in terms so glowing, that a gentleman 
 present thought it full time to remind her and the 
 prisoners that such unqualified praise could scarcely 
 be merited by young gentlemen placed under her 
 husband's lock and key. 
 
 A stranger, who had landed with us from the 
 steam-boat, was much entertained by a corporal 
 who accosted hun, when wandering about the fort 
 alone, and announced with great official importance, 
 that he was " the Governor !" adding the important 
 fact, that four thousand pounds of gunpowder were 
 placed under his charge, but on inquiring it came 
 out that he has no authority to fire, even if an enemy 
 appear, and that he has the command of no garrison 
 but himself. A party of mischievous boys at Ler- 
 wick, on one occasion, alarmed the whole surround- 
 ing country, by privately loading one of the super- 
 annuated cannons at Fort Charlotte and firing it off! 
 Some part of the wall was shattered, in consequence 
 of an extra charge having been thrust in, and a sen- 
 sation was occasioned by the explosion like that 
 caused to Sir Walter Scott's Antiquary when the 
 10 
 
110 LERWICK. 
 
 beacon-fire at Fairport was lighted. The whole 
 population of Lerwick flew to ascertain what en- 
 emy had landed to take possession of the island, and 
 we can scarcely wonder at some panic being ex- 
 cited, considering that the nearest naval force which 
 can be summoned to protect any part of Scotland is 
 stationed at Chatham. If Paul Jones had a suc- 
 cessor, he might land in Shetland any day, as he did 
 once in Galloway, and take the very tea-pots off the 
 breakfast-tables. 
 
 On the last birth-day which George the Fourth 
 lived to see, the flag-staff at Lerwick Castle fell 
 prostrate to the earth, which was afterwards con- 
 sidered a prophetic omen. The very same pole is 
 now so insufficiently propped up that all well- 
 %vishers of her present Majesty should subscribe to 
 raise one, which shall promise, by its firmness, to see 
 out the present century, or longer, if possible. Loyal 
 as the inhabitants of Shetland are, however, their 
 woods and forests could scarcely supply so much as 
 a pair of Dutch clogs, and still less a new flag-staff, 
 but we must suppose the trees were all cut down to 
 show the sea views, which are so very fine. The 
 tallest and grandest tree I saw during my stay on 
 the island, was a stalk of rhubarb nearly seven feet 
 high, which had run to seed, and waved its head 
 majestically in a garden below the fort, looking quite 
 shady and ornamental. It had been planted by 
 
LERWICK. Ill 
 
 some officers, and really did them great credit. The 
 Arabians have a proverb, which I wish we may all 
 live to see realized here, " Be patient, and the mul- 
 berry-leaf will become satin." 
 
 I expected to observe Shetland ponies galloping 
 in every field, but they are chiefly running wild 
 among the distant unenclosed hills, where, in most 
 instances, the fore-legs are manacled together. 
 Nothing is trusted to the honour of a Shetland 
 poney, but they are all shackled in a most uneasy 
 manner, hobbling along like rabbits, which incon- 
 venient contrivance ruins their paces afterwards. 
 When well fed from an early age, they grow nearly 
 to the height of a donkey, but some years ago, Mr. 
 Hay reared a perfectly well-formed poney, which 
 measured only twenty-six inches high. Not so tall 
 as a moderate-sized hobby-horse ! I have heard 
 sportsmen talk in praise of a horse that would can- 
 ter round a cabbage-leaf, but here was one literally 
 capable of doing so. The very largest men ride 
 these tiny little creatures at full speed, looking from 
 a distance as if they had merely hooked on a pair 
 of additional legs, being scarcely raised a foot off 
 the ground, and yet racing rapidly along. How 
 would a regiment of calvary look, mounted, or low- 
 ered rather, on these stout little chargers ! 
 
 Many very curious arctic birds stray over to 
 this country, and I have seen one most beautiful 
 
112 LERWICK. 
 
 snow-owl, which had been killed in this neighbour- 
 hood, as large as an eagle, and the colour of a swan- 
 down muff. Eider ducks are very abundant, and 
 eagles so very destructive, that five shillings a-head 
 used to be given for shooting them. Swans appear 
 in great flocks during spring. I dare say you have 
 not forgotten our friend, who said he had very near- 
 ly sent you a swan-down muff from the Highlands, 
 and when we asked an explanation of the reason 
 why so welcome a present never came, it turned 
 out that he had merely " seen a flight of wdld swans 
 over his head, and wished he had a gun !" 
 
 Of course all the birds here must live on the 
 ground, having neither hedges nor trees in which 
 to form a colony, but the plovers and other unam- 
 bitious kinds malce themselves quite at home. I am 
 told the crows build their nests of fish-bones, as a 
 substitute for sticks, which shows a great deal of 
 genius, equal to that of the Greenlanders, who form 
 their houses of whalebone. It is interesting thus to 
 observe how nearly instinct can approach to reason, 
 in adapting means to an end, but the one is born at 
 once to its utmost perfection, and the other is culti- 
 vated or destroyed by the possessor, according as he 
 employs it, and may be advanced, if used in a Chris- 
 tian spirit, to higher and higher perfection every 
 day, stretching from earth to heaven, till it reaches 
 the ceaseless progress of an eternal existence. 
 
LERWICK. 113 
 
 Nature is outlined along this coast on so mag- 
 nificent a scale, that we scarcely miss the softer 
 touches, which give grace and beauty to a land- 
 scape. All that rock and water can do, is done ; 
 and while ornamental vegetation is entirely wanting, 
 that which is useful seems abundant, especially in 
 the valley of Tingwall, where grain and vegetables 
 ripen in their utmost perfection j the pasture is so 
 excellent, it would have transported an Argyleshire 
 laird, who was asked some time since whether he 
 had been disappointed in his first view of Staifa, 
 when he replied, " Quite the contrary ! I was told 
 the island pastured only twenty sheep, and I counted 
 fourscore !" 
 
 The labour and expense to which several pro- 
 prietors have gone, in cultivating trees and gardens, 
 do prodigious honour to their perseverance, patriot- 
 ism, and taste ; but in a climate where gooseberries 
 scarcely ripen on the wall, and apples are unknown, 
 what can be done 1 We have all a tendency to 
 that respectable weakness of thinking our own 
 country the best in the world, and the enterprising 
 cultivators here, may console themselves about their 
 unproductive soil, by saying, as the Duke of Wel- 
 lington said of his army, " It is given to me to make 
 the best of !" 
 
 The youngest children in Shetland can make ^n 
 income of twenty shilUngs per annum, by catching 
 10* 
 
114 LERWICK. 
 
 the small fish named " sillocks, or pars," abomiding 
 in swarms here, which owe their value to the oil 
 extracted from them, two thousand barrels of which 
 were manufactured in one year, from those diminu- 
 tive fry, not measuring above four or five inches 
 long. Thus food and light become easily accessi- 
 ble in a country where grain is scarce, and where 
 the days are not over long. 
 
 In the churchyard at Ting wall, this inscription 
 appears on an old tomb-stone, " Here lies an honest 
 man !" It seems like an implied imputation on all 
 those buried near him. There is more truth perhaps 
 in that simple memorial, than in a panegyrical epi- 
 taph I was busy reading at a certain cathedral 
 lately, wondering how so great and good a man 
 could ever have been spared out of the world, when 
 the beadle, observing my occupation, quietly said, 
 " He was the very reverse, ma'am, of all you see 
 there !" 
 
 We had an excellent sermon at Lerwick from 
 the parish clergyman, Mr. Barclay, formerly pro- 
 fessor of elocution at Aberdeen. He gave us so 
 edifying an address, that if I could attend church in 
 Shetland without crossing the sea, it would give me 
 pleasure to go often. The innkeeper conducted us 
 to his own pew, and I had scarcely time to settle 
 myself comfortably, before the clerk, a most res- 
 pectable man in black robes, began publishing, in 
 
LERWICK. 115 
 
 an easy gossiping tone, the banns of several mar- 
 riages ! Not seeing any objection to the proposed 
 alliances, I forbade none of them, but began specu- 
 lating how it could possibly happen, that in this 
 strange place, the clerk's voice and physiognomy 
 seemed quite familiar to me. He sung particularly 
 well, being one of the best " precentors" I know, 
 and after a moment's perplexity, it flashed across 
 my recollection, that this was actually " mine host" 
 from the bar ! We almost expected to find a charge 
 for the pew in his bill, but our expenses from be- 
 ginning to end in Shetland could scarcely cover the 
 point of a pin. 
 
 Nothing could exceed the hospitality and kind- 
 ness we received from Mr. Hay, who is quite a 
 northern lord of the isles, his name being as inti- 
 mately connected wdth Shetland as Bonaparte's wdth 
 St. Helena, and his house becomes a home to every 
 stranger w^ho reaches these shores. A great dis- 
 tinction is made here between " Scotchmen and 
 Shetlanders ;" but the Scotch hospitality, for which 
 we are justly celebrated, is almost outdone by our 
 northern neighbours, many of whom were most kind- 
 ly urgent that we should measure our visit by weeks 
 rather than by hours. I have promised, if any wind 
 blows me here again, to remain as many days as 
 will enable us to see every thing thoroughly ; so, 
 considering what scarce commodities good days are, 
 
116 LERWICK. 
 
 our visit may probably extend throughout a whole 
 season. 
 
 On Monday we discussed in long and anxious 
 debate with Mr. Hay how that one only morning 
 we had for seeing all Shetland, could be most ad- 
 vantageously disposed of, and he entered into our 
 case with the same mature deliberation as if I had 
 consulted him about the investment of my whole 
 fortune. The day threatened every thing ! wind, 
 rain, mist, and cold ! nothing could look more un- 
 propitious, but still some adventure must be achieved, 
 and as we could not visit both Scalloway Castle 
 and Noss Cradle, we weighed the castle against the 
 precipice, balancing and re-balancing their merits 
 with the most careful precision, and puzzled beyond 
 measure which must kick the beam. At last it sud- 
 denly occurred to me that I can see a castle any day, 
 but such a cradle as that of Noss never, therefore 
 the scale began to preponderate greatly, when Mr. 
 Hay being summoned on business to Lerwick, com- 
 mitted us to the custody of his son, ordering ponies 
 to the door in case we preferred Scalloway, and a 
 boat if we determined to try a second childhood in 
 the cradle. 
 
 As Burns remarked, " the plans of mice and 
 men are liable to go awry." Nine hours after- 
 wards, when Mr. Hay returned, he found us still 
 seated in the drawing-room, having seen neither the 
 
LERWICK. IIT- 
 
 one place nor the other, as unfortunately a squall of 
 wind; with bitter torrents of rain, had come on, ac- 
 companied by a fog, which cut the head off every 
 precipice and hilL It was the sort of rain that never 
 stops, being dogged-looking and obstinate, proceed- 
 ing from large mountainous clouds, hanging heavily 
 down, as if Ben Lomond and Schiehallion had 
 mounted overhead, therefore we resigned ourselves 
 to a very pleasant chat in the house, with the 
 agreeable family circle of Mr. Hay, joined by Mr. 
 Hamilton, who had crossed from Brassay to meet us 
 again. As Chateaubriand desired a friend to inscribe 
 his name on the pyramids of Egypt, that posterity 
 might never guess he had actually left the country 
 without inspecting them, we must get our signatures 
 engraved on the cliffs at Noss. 
 
 It has been long remarked, that the gentry in 
 Shetland use their long winter evenings to great 
 advantage, in reading most extensively, which be- 
 comes so obviously the case in conversing with them, 
 that I began almost to regret our own days not being 
 equally short. Perhaps also the cold winds here 
 assist in sharpening people's intellects, a propos 
 to which I am about to start a perfectly new philo- 
 sophical theory on this very subject ! Warm cli- 
 mates certainly do enervate the mind, as we see that 
 the lowest scale of intellect prevails in Africa, China, 
 and the West Indies. Italy and France are greatly 
 
118 LERWICK. 
 
 inferior to England ; — Scotland excels them all, and 
 even our great magician, Sir Walter Scott, before 
 writing his Pirate, or his journal, took a sharpening 
 in Shetland. Now, this all combines to prove, on 
 undoubted premises, like Phrenology or Animal 
 Magnetism, that peculiar acuteness should be ex- 
 pected in minds oearest the pole, and if you think a 
 course of popular lectures on the subject would 
 " take," perhaps I could sketch out the prospectus. 
 Common phraseology favours my discovery, as every 
 man who makes too clever a bargain with his neigh- 
 bour, is said to be " too far north for him !" and, 
 besides, the most brilliant magazine in Scotland is 
 edited by Christopher North ! Need I say more ? 
 
 Instead of travelling over Shetland with us, Mr. 
 Charles Hay very obligingly showed me a chart of 
 it, on so large a scale, that three inches are given to 
 each mile, and not a single peat-stack seemed want- 
 ing, therefore we made a leisurely tour over the 
 wide expanse, pausing occasionally to hear elabo- 
 rate descriptions of the curiosities we ought to have 
 seen, and of the accidents we might probably have 
 met with ; all very interesting, but also rather tan- 
 talizing. 
 
 During a short promenade, we inspected one of 
 the primitive mills frequently used here to grind 
 corn, exactly similar to those of Norway, and I wish 
 the whole board of agriculture had accompanied us 
 
LERWICK. 119 
 
 to be diverted at the sight of this antediluvian ma- 
 chinery. It consisted of four very low dykes, with 
 a turf roof, beneath which, a small stream running 
 in a trough not four inches deep, turned a wheel 
 placed horizontally instead of perpendicularly, so 
 that half the force was neutralized, and there you 
 have the whote concern ! 
 
 Near the Cleik'em-in-Mill, we were shown a 
 most amusing little miniature cottage, containing 
 one window behind, one before, one in the roof, and 
 a door, but there are five apartments inside. Burn 
 or Gillespie might have been proud of laying out 
 the accommodation to so much advantage, but it 
 was all planned and executed by the proprietor, a 
 custom-house officer, on hospitable thoughts intent, 
 who wished to have spare beds for his friends. The 
 dining-room is so very small that any one sitting at 
 table, must rise and stand quite upright against the 
 wall, if the door be opened ; but this superb resi- 
 dence rejoices in a name larger than itself, being 
 called " Glenspleuchen," and the owner may always 
 keep up his dignity like the gentleman described in 
 an old ballad, — 
 
 " Stately slept he east the wa', 
 And stately slept he west." 
 
 The finest remnant of a Teutonic Castle which 
 ever enchanted the society of antiquaries may be 
 seen on the island of Mousa, twelve miles distant 
 
120 LERWICK. 
 
 from Lerwick. It stands about forty feet high, look- 
 ing externally like a small pyramid of Egypt, — or 
 some pre-Adamite conformation, — or an old glass 
 house — take any comparison you like best. It is 
 composed of two circular w^alls, one within the 
 other, like the ivory balls from China, leaving a 
 passage about five feet wide between? This inter- 
 val is said to have been used for a place of safety 
 during war, and as these retreats, from their wind- 
 ing about, were called di-agons or serpents, it has 
 been conjectured that an allusion to such ancient 
 sanctuaries may have originated the allegorical ro- 
 mances, afterwards so popular, relating to beautiful 
 Princesses who were guarded by monsters, and res- 
 cued by dragons. 
 
 There is, in most well-constituted minds, an in- 
 stinctive respect for rank, which certainly ought to 
 exist in a high degree, if, as in many cases, it only 
 adorns what is in other respects pre-eminent, and 
 acts as " the guinea stamp" on that which is already 
 gold. In a country like Shetland, without any resi- 
 dent nobility, I scarcely think, that if all the pleas- 
 ing, well-bred people we conversed with had been 
 insensibly transformed into dukes and duchesses, it 
 could have made our evenmg circle more agreeable 
 or entertaining ; but at present, the great theme of 
 conversation in every house, and the most deserv- 
 edly popular person in the far north, seems to be a 
 
LERWICK. 121 
 
 young nobleman, the first English peer who ever 
 penetrated into Shetland. It certainly is most grati- 
 fying to a part of the world, usually forsaken and 
 neglected, even by those who are its natural resi- 
 dents, that the inhabitants have been repeatedly 
 visited, on terms of cordial kindness and intimacy, 
 by one who might choose his own society in any 
 part of Great Britain, and whose estates are almost 
 equal in value to any one of the three northern 
 counties in which, for the last two years, he has 
 resided. The young men in Shetland expected 
 nothing but luxurious indolence from an " English 
 Lord" possessing unbounded wealth, whose guar- 
 dians had recently purchased an addition to his vast 
 estates to the value of ^6900,000, but they were as- 
 tonished at his arriving across these dangerous seas, 
 having performed a voyage of one hundred miles in 
 an open fishing-boat, and still more, that being an 
 accomplished scholar, and accompanied by one of 
 the most pious and learned tutors at Oxford, he 
 nevertheless excelled in all the field-sports and 
 athletic exercises to which they were accustomed. 
 
 The three predecessors of Lord Ward were each, 
 in their day, pre-eminent for something. The first 
 was so distinguished for his personal appearance, 
 that in the well-known print you have seen, repre- 
 senting Lord Chatham's death, his figure was made 
 the most prominent of all. My grand uncle, Lord 
 11 
 
 / 
 
122 LERWICK. 
 
 Dudley and Ward, who succeeded him, expended 
 so many thousands every year in building churches, 
 and in the most lavish charitable benefactions, that 
 he was justly called " the rich man's model, and the 
 poor man's friend ;" and his son, the late Earl Dud- 
 ley, Secretary of State to George the Fomlh, 
 though his great abilities were tarnished by an ex- 
 traordinary degree of eccentricity, was, nevertheless, 
 one of the most brilliant wits and accomplished 
 scholars of his time. Though an only son, yet from 
 infancy he never knew the happiness of domestic 
 life, having been, at the early age of six months, 
 placed by his rather whimsical parents in a separate 
 house and establishment, where they occasionally 
 visited him, but his education was entirely superin- 
 tended by a succession of nursery governesses and 
 tutors, and he always declared that his only experi- 
 ence of a happy home was when placed at last 
 under the roof of Professor Dugald Stewart, at 
 Edinburgh. His life of early solitude engendered 
 those peculiar habits which occasionally clouded the 
 lustre of his shining abilities, and among other 
 strange customs, he acquired so unconquerable a 
 habit of thinking aloud, that his intimate friends 
 used to say, in allusion to his two titles, that " Dud- 
 ley was speaking to Ward." The ludicrous effect 
 produced by these public meditations during his 
 Majesty's cabinet councils, became a principal cause 
 
LERWICK. 123 
 
 of his retirement from office. On one occasion, 
 when a gentleman obUgingly took him home in his 
 carriage, to avoid a shower of rain, he conversed 
 dihgently with himself during their progress, saying, 
 " I suppose he will expect me to ask him to dinner ! 
 I'm afraid it must be done." His companion being 
 fond of a jest, instantly commenced an accompani- 
 ment, muttering to himself quite audibly, " If he 
 asks me to dinner, I shall certainly not go !" Upon 
 hearing this. Lord Dudley laughed heartily, made an 
 apology, and insisted on the invitation being both 
 given and accepted, which aocordingly it was. A 
 fall from his horse, on the continent, seems to have 
 occasioned some disease of the brain, which brought 
 a melancholy cloud over his latter years, and at his 
 own express desire, all his papers were destroyed, 
 leaving no record behind worthy of his great intel- 
 lect, before it darkened into the gloom of night. 
 
 The steam-boat being about to sail from Shet- 
 land, we were now called on to decide either on 
 leaving the island immediately, or staying an entire 
 week. If we could have lingered on from day to 
 day, I might probably have enjoyed myself there 
 for a month, but it is a serious thing to accept an 
 invitation from strangers for seven long days ; and 
 though the hospitable inhabitants appeared to think 
 that those who once came there should never go 
 away, while we were surrounded by more agreeable 
 
124 LERWICK. 
 
 friends than I ever made in so short a time before, 
 each of whom we were sorry to leave, yet we ad- 
 hered firmly to om* original plan of departing, " much 
 and justly regretted." Meantime the weather had 
 become stormy, the wind cutting like a scythe, and 
 the atmosphere moreover so hazy, that I felt almost 
 tempted to settle for life in Shetland, rather than 
 encounter the very formidable voyage before us. 
 We wished it liad been possible now to summon 
 the obliging genii who carried Prince Camaralza- 
 man a thousand leagues without disturbing his slum- 
 bers ! I envied every bird that flew past, and 
 scarcely dared even to look at the sea, thinking 
 how much too intimately acquainted we should 
 soon become ; but after a P P C dinner with Mr. 
 Hay, we embarked, escorted by all the kind friends 
 we had acqmred at Lerwick, on board the steam- 
 boat, or Damp-skiff, as it is appropriately named in 
 our friend the Danish govei'nor's language. 
 
 Having been always hitherto accustomed to 
 consider Thurso Castle as the ultima thule, I could 
 not get over the oddity of receiving the good wishes 
 of our companions for a pleasant voyage south to 
 Caithness, and certainly the prospect of its being 
 safe or agreeable seemed momentarily diminishing. 
 The captain expressed great surprise at my em- 
 barking on such a night of fog and wind, while a 
 poor woman, who had brought three ponies to be 
 
LERWICK. 125 
 
 transported, said the evening was too rough for 
 them, and led her little flock ashore. I very nearly 
 determined to accompany them back, and had not 
 quite made up my mind on the subject, when sud- 
 denly the vessel started off in full career, the skiff 
 containing our convoy of friends gradually vanished 
 in the fog, the w^aving of handkerchiefs ceased, and 
 Shetland was no more. 
 
 I felt much amused at a sailor, when we came 
 
 on board, observing to A , " I thought you 
 
 would not stay long, Sir ! the climate is too cold for 
 any gentleman !" 
 
 What a night this w^as ! I dared not go below 
 at all, but turned two days into one, by remaining 
 on deck, watching the endless twilight, while our 
 tottering boat wrestled through the long sweeping 
 waves, which tilted us up as if we had been placed 
 on an enormous swing, and then away we dashed 
 into the very bosom of the ocean, casting up a sheet 
 of spray which drenched all the deck. Never were 
 mountains so easily ascended ! we sprung up the 
 side of Ben Nevis or Snowdon at a single bound, 
 and then rushed down a Montague Russe to the 
 bottom, — 
 
 While ev'ry mad wave drown'd the moon, 
 Or whistled aloft its tempest tune. 
 
 The sun set, looking dimly and coldly through dark 
 
 stripes of grey cloud, as if enclosed within a large 
 
 11* 
 
126 ~ lerwick:. 
 
 iron grate, and burned to embers, but at last it went 
 entirely out, so the world remained, with nothing 
 visible by the cold wan twilight, but the moon, the 
 stars, and myself. The whole creation seemed like 
 a dream, so solemn and indistinct, as if the world 
 were in a trance, but for the stormy wind which 
 blew with unabated vehemence. Nothing brings 
 to my mind so awful an idea of the wrath of God, 
 as that sustained exhibition of His mighty power, to 
 be traced in a hurricane. Even a thunder-storm is 
 scarcely so impressive ! 
 
 Morning was at last ushered in by the crowing 
 of a cock most vociferously, and the sun himself 
 emerged from the ocean like a globe of liquid fire, 
 blazing over sea and sky, till both were illuminated 
 with a flood of splendour. I should have liked, for 
 the moment, to be an Italian improvisatrice, and 
 apostrophized the sun, moon, stars, ocean, and all 
 the grand objects which had so recently delighted 
 me 5 but the true sublime of their existence is only 
 to be fully appreciated in connection with their 
 great originator. I could not but think, if the sun 
 were an eye visibly watching all we do or think, it 
 would cause a most solemnizing restraint over all 
 our actions. "What scenes that orb has look'd 
 upon, since first its race began !" Yet this bright 
 luminary is but one manifestation among thousands 
 gloriously testifying the perpetual presence and un- 
 
LERWICK. 127 
 
 ceasing watchfulness of that omnipotent Being who 
 created us and it, — whose eye is in every place, 
 " beholding the evil and the good." Why do we 
 not more constantly remember that great and holy 
 Being, who " compasseth our path and our lying 
 down, and is acquainted with all our ways ?" 
 
 I contrived to stand on deck, grasping hold of 
 a rope, and clinging to the gangway, while Captain 
 Philips traced the whole scene of Sir Walter Scott's 
 Pirate, and treated me to a running criticism on its 
 merits, which might have made a valuable article 
 for the Quarterly Review. He had lately compli- 
 mented the novel by a second perusal, and pointed 
 to where once stood the ruins of Jarlshof Castle, and 
 where the towering precipice of Fitful Head still 
 keeps its station, looking almost supernatural. It 
 rises four hundred feet perpendicularly out of the 
 ocean ; and, at the moment we passed it, was 
 crow^ned by fantastic wreaths of mist, blown into 
 strange unearthly peaks, the whole of which looked 
 so perfectly solid, that you might have fancied they 
 were all actual rocks. 
 
 Captain Philips is a most fearless navigator, 
 having once attempted the nearly impossible exploit 
 of sailing through " the Roost of Sumburgh," a boil- 
 ing sea, which dashes tumultuously up to the base 
 of a headland, towering bold and erect nearly one 
 thousand feet high, thus raising its head to heaven. 
 
128 LERWICK. 
 
 while storms and tempests rage unheeded at its foot. 
 There the Atlantic and German oceans meet, on not 
 very peaceful terms, and the waves break up with 
 such gigantic strength, that the spray is sometimes 
 thrown several hundred feet over the rocks, falling 
 back in a perfect Niagara of foam; and a long 
 stream of turbulent billows may be traced three 
 miles into the ocean, caused by this concussion of 
 tides. Vessels inadvertently entering its vortex 
 during a comparative calm, have been tossed, with- 
 out hope of escape, for three or four days, with the 
 waves washing almost in a stream over the deck. 
 This description reminded me of the young lady 
 who suddenly changed her mind about going to 
 India, and gave, as her reason, that she was told, 
 " every vessel, in crossing the line, remained three 
 days under water !" 
 
 On the occasion of trying his powers in the 
 Roost, Captain Philips penetrated forwards, till the 
 Sovereign was literally boring through the waves, 
 and being at length within a few buckets of be- 
 coming quite ingulfed, she with some difficulty 
 wheeled about, not quite drowned, and all but 
 swamped. Since then, no audacious paddles have 
 intruded within that very respectful distance at 
 which we kept from Sumburgh-head, which has 
 presided over some fearful shipwrecks. Many a 
 noble vessel has there sunk to rise no more, and 
 
WICK. 129 
 
 many a despairing eye has fixed its last glance on 
 those mighty cliffs ! In 1595, the Earl of Orkney 
 made a law, that if any man attempted to relieve 
 vessels in distress, he should be punished in his per- 
 son, and forthwith severely fined, at his Lordship's 
 own pleasure, a discretionary power, exercised on 
 so very extensive a scale, that he was finally exe- 
 cuted at Edinburgh for his tyrannical and rapacious 
 conduct. It was rather an awkward superstition 
 among the lower orders long ago, that whoever 
 rescued a diowning man, might depend upon re- 
 ceiving some mortal injury from his hand ; but I 
 hope the Humane Society can give a different report 
 in modern times, and return a favourable verdict of 
 "not proven." 
 
 The harbour at Wick is considered, during an 
 east wind, the most dangerous part of a voyage 
 from Shetland ! therefore, seeing the wind riotous, 
 and the waves tossing up their white curly heads 
 in the bay. Captain Philips recommended that we 
 should trust ourselves in preference to a small boat 
 in Sinclair bay, which accordingly we did, landing 
 near the ancient walls of Ackergill tower, after a 
 nineteen hours passage from Shetland ; and really, 
 considering all we had come through, I felt rather 
 astonished to see myself alive and well. When did 
 you ever hear of a voyage in which people were 
 not within an inch of their lives 1 The innkeeper 
 
130 WICK. 
 
 at Wick proved himself quite a genius in his line, 
 having actually shown so much forethought, as to 
 place a gig in waiting for us close to the surf, in 
 which we deposited our heavy baggage, and 
 walked to the town, two miles off, where, even on 
 these desolate heaths, I could have exclaimed, like 
 Gonzalo, " Now would I give a thousand furlongs 
 of sea for an acre of barren ground." I would say 
 of such a voyage, as Lord Chesterfield did of hunt- 
 ing, " Do people ever go a second time !" It cer- 
 tainly is a wonderful infatuation, and every excur- 
 sion I make is always " positively for the last time, 
 and by particular desire;" but again and again 
 some dire necessity occurs, and I become " an invol- 
 untary voluntary" once more on the sea. 
 
 If you are desirous to have a letter answered 
 immediately, write always to the busiest persons 
 you know, for they are always the most punctual, 
 of which my epistle to-day is an undeniable instance. 
 In considerable haste, and with a one-legged pen, 
 yours, &c. &c. 
 
FERRYTOWN. 
 
 Though to the west retreating, 
 Daylight may soon be fleeting; 
 Welcome ye darker hours, 
 Our sunshine is within. 
 
 JVIy dear Cousm, — If our correspondence con- 
 tinues to be kept up so diligently, we shall both soon 
 resemble the Spanish author, who wrote three times 
 as many pages as he lived days in the world ; and 
 though he was considered a wonderful man in those 
 primitive times, it is quite an everyday case now, 
 for there are many living authors who can make a 
 ream of paper " look foolish" in a month. Easy 
 writing is said to be very hard reading, but we have 
 weekly and monthly opportunities of trying the ex- 
 periment now, as many who might become stand- 
 ard authors, if they did themselves any justice, pre- 
 fer writing against time. Such w^orks come out in 
 a galloping consumption from the first, published, 
 bought, read, buried in oblivion, and succeeded by 
 a fresh progeny from the same pen, all within the 
 period of a Quarterly Review, and we are scarcely 
 ailowed time to form a more accurate estimate of 
 their value than the student who hurried through 
 
132 FERRYTOWN. 
 
 Euclid in a week, and said it was very amusing, but 
 he could make nothing of the pictures. Formerly 
 the world was said to be divided into three classes. 
 Those who live to read, — ^those who live to act, — 
 and those who live to talk, — but you will allow we 
 have a fourth class now, more numerous than all 
 the others united, — those who live to write. I re- 
 member hearing of a whimsical publisher, who used 
 at his dinner-parties to make authors take precedence 
 according to the bulk of their works. The folios 
 walked first, the quartos followed, the octavos came 
 last, and, I suppose, the duodecimos dropped in to 
 tea, but if your correspondents have rank on the 
 same scale of measurement, this letter will promote 
 me to a place of great distinction, as I mean it to be 
 perfectly endless. 
 
 An Italian proverb says, " Every road leads to 
 Rome," but here the most northern highways in 
 Scotland are like the spokes of a wheel, all center- 
 ing at Inverness. Though I would gladly sweep 
 round a hundred miles, to avoid revisiting the same 
 place, no other outlet presents itself towards the 
 south, and therefore we resigned ourselves to a 
 tiresome da capo. An Irishman got himself once 
 into the greatest perplexity while counting on his 
 fingers a party of three with whom he had dined the 
 previous day : " There were the two O'Flanagans 
 one, myself tw^o ; but who was the third 1 The 
 
FERRYTOWN. 133 
 
 two O'Flanagans one, myself two ! !" — now in the 
 same way, to save repetition, my two visits to Inver- 
 ness shall be reckoned for one, though, pre^dous to 
 our arrival, the journey of one hundred and twenty 
 miles is vp^orth describing, as we were pursued the 
 whole way by the same hurricane which escorted 
 us from Shetland. I enjoyed it now most comfort- 
 ably, however, on shore, admiring the picturesque 
 effect of ships in a storm, and feeling most thank- 
 ful not to be on board. Some travellers are in such 
 haste, they would sacrifice their lives to save half an 
 hour, and a gentleman who washed to proceed by 
 the mail yesterday from Golspie to Inverness, find- 
 ing it full, embarked in an open boat, which was 
 instantly blown out to sea, carried off the contrary 
 way, and finally dashed to pieces, but he was him- 
 self picked up almost alive, as far north as Helms- 
 dale, by a Frenchman who was passing by chance, 
 and arrived safe this morning at the point from 
 which he set out. 
 
 When we reached Ferrytown the sea was cov- 
 ered with a drifting foam, so that even the mail 
 could not think of crossing, and the ferryman's wife 
 told us that, though he usually crosses in ten min- 
 utes, her husband had been at sea six hours during 
 the morning vainly trying to get over. She was in 
 tears most of the time, expecting him every instant 
 to go down, but there he stood now perfectly safe ; 
 12 
 
134 FERRYTOWN. 
 
 and it would have made you smile to see the little 
 ordinary looking old man who had been the object 
 of interest and affection so intense. Her feelings 
 were rather more pleasingly testified than those of 
 
 Lady for her husband, when he nearly fell 
 
 overboard from a steam-boat, and she called out to 
 a sailor, " Take care of that man, for he belongs to 
 
 me ; 
 
 t" 
 
 The ferryman seemed quite ready to try an ex- 
 perimental trip across, if any of us had the least 
 curiosity to go. He wore a silver snuff-box, given 
 him for saving the lives of fifteen persons on a for- 
 mer occasion, which was some encouragement, and 
 he seemed quite anxious for another opportunity of 
 distinguishing himself. I saw the spot where a boat 
 was upset thirty years since, when ninety-nine per- 
 sons were lost, and we were shown the very wave 
 in which an English gentleman, an admirable swim- 
 mer, was drowned some years ago, so that seemed 
 quite warning enough ! I prefer, at any time, avoid- 
 ing a danger to escaping out of it, and, therefore, 
 when we heard some time afterwards that a boat 
 was actually in preparation to carry the mail across, 
 I proposed a resolution and seconded it myself, that 
 A and I should remain a day at the Ferry- 
 house, wliich question was triumphantly carried by 
 a Whig majority of one. 
 
 It was an interesting moment when we stood 
 
FERRYTOWN. 135 
 
 on the shore, accompanied by several other travel- 
 lers as prudent as ourselves, watching with strained 
 eyes the little enterprising vessel tossing and tumb- 
 ling on the angry billows as if it had been mad, but 
 the letter-bags landed in triumph at last, having 
 been blown over in nine minutes ! Those who re- 
 ceived their correspondence that day, httle knew at 
 what hazard these epistles were punctually for- 
 warded. 
 
 A boatman who conducted us to the little cot- 
 tage-inn at Ferrytown, informed me that the land- 
 lady only admitted "very particular people," but 
 our reception M'as favourable, and she even conde- 
 scended to cook some excellent hot cakes, as we 
 were quite in the humour of taking what your friend 
 calls " a big tea." This was the smallest inn I 
 ever entered, but remarkably tidy, with table-cloths, 
 sheets, and damask towels, as fine as in any gentle- 
 man's house. How unfortunate that the good old 
 spinning days of Scotland are over : aged women 
 no longer find a cheerful companion in their wheels, 
 the busy hum of which used to beguile their lonely 
 horns. Every cottage then amassed its treasures of 
 home-made linen, so that while the younger women, 
 like our landlady, added to the comfort of their 
 household and children by active industry, the aged 
 used very frequently to occupy their latter days, with 
 a melancholy satisfaction, in preparing their own 
 
136 INVERNESS. 
 
 winding-sheet, and the perfect pride and pleasure 
 with which the dying now talk of having their 
 " dead clothes" ready, would sometimes almost 
 startle you. 
 
 As one of the greatest agricultural meetings in 
 the north was taking place at Inverness, and two 
 hundred gentlemen had assembled to dine here, 
 from all parts of the country, we were quite aston- 
 ished at our own good fortune in obtaining comfort- 
 able apartments at the Caledonian Hotel, where I 
 scarcely expected to find standing room. Many 
 years ago, my father succeeded in establishing a 
 yearly wool-market at Inverness, where no one can 
 say there is " much cry and little wool." The sales 
 are so extensive, that more than 100,000 sheep 
 generally change owners here annually, besides an 
 incredible quantity of wool. • From the window of 
 our sitting-room, I can see at this moment a solid 
 mass of several hundred people belonging to every 
 rank and degree, who have stood immovable there 
 during two successive days! English cloth mer- 
 chants, Scotch proprietors, farmers, factors, and 
 shepherds, all evidently with their brains wool- 
 gathering, are so busy making bargains, that they 
 mind a shower of rain no more than the sheep do 
 they are selling, while the weather is hopelessly 
 dismal, and the sky of one universal leaden hue, as 
 if our whole world were under the canopy of a tin 
 dish-cover. 
 
INVERNESS. 137 
 
 We are amused with observing hovr much char- 
 acter may be traced in the different ways those in- 
 numerable people set about transacting their busi- 
 ness. Some are swaggering along, taking every 
 man by the button, and looking as patronizing and 
 consequential as possible, — others are sneaking about 
 as if they had picked a pocket, or intended doing 
 so, — some look so sharp and acute, that I would 
 feel sure of being overreached by them, if they so 
 much as exchanged civilities with me, — one or two 
 look as if they could cheat another, if he only tossed 
 up with him for sixpence, and others seem perfect 
 images of dulness and stupidity, remaining as still 
 as if they had been turned into lamp posts. 
 
 I expected to have passed through miles of 
 sheep on the road to Inverness, and to have encoun- 
 tered myriads in the town ; but not at all ! every 
 free and independent flock sends a representative in 
 the shape of a drover, who attends to the interests 
 of his constituents, and sells them for what he can 
 get. Several of these Highland shepherds are very 
 " primitive formations," and one I observed, from 
 our own country, so large and athletic, he might 
 have brought, without much difficulty, a sheep in 
 each pocket. This very respectable man, John 
 Paterson, who is a well known character in the 
 north, began the world as a herd-boy on my father's 
 property, and when he drove our flocks from the 
 12* 
 
13S INVERNESS. 
 
 Highlands formerly to market, always managed to 
 billet them every night on the fields of our friends 
 or relatives. Proprietors were occasionally thunder- 
 struck in a morning to behold a shower of sheep 
 scattered over their meadows, apparently quite at 
 home, while worthy John Paterson thought it a 
 perfectly sufficient apology to say they were " Sir 
 John's !" He has repeatedly been heard to mention, 
 that his own fortune originally amounted only to 
 3s. 6d., but now, by honest industry and skilful 
 management, it has multiplied into ^£25,000 ! 
 
 Several other instances were pointed out to me, 
 in which the rearing of sheep had become an equally 
 sucessful speculation, and formerly, my father used 
 to tell me, that about the year 1790, he had de- 
 clined an offer from Mrs. Mackay, the proprietor of 
 Bighouse, who wished him to give her an annuity 
 for life of .£300 a year, and to take her estate in 
 exchange, which w^as sold not many years after- 
 wards for .£50,000, owang to the success of the 
 British Wool Society, which he originated and es- 
 tablished. The value of Highland property was 
 thus so greatly enhanced, that the estate of Reay, 
 which previously produced only £1500 a-year, was 
 purchased by the late Duke of Sutherland for 
 £450,000 ! 
 
 Sheep have their merits, and they now certainly 
 fulfil the prophecy of old Thomas the Rhymer six 
 
INVERNESS. 139 
 
 hundred years ago, that " the teeth of the sheep 
 shall lay the plough on the shelf." A whole flock 
 must have changed their names to mutton for the 
 dinner to-day, as two hundred hungry gentlemen 
 drew in their chairs at six, with Mr. Donald Home 
 to preside, one of the most popular and convivial 
 presidents for such occasions in the north, and he 
 filled the chair, or perhaps I should rather say, the 
 woolsack, with great eclat, till a late hour. 
 
 It often amuses me to calculate the many years 
 of preparation which all necessarily combine to 
 produce the grand result of a perfectly well-ordered 
 dinner party. In the first place, the very servants 
 who wait at table require a long apprenticeship of 
 drilling and practice, before they acquire the sort 
 of legerdemain and discipline, absolutely essential 
 on their part, — then the cook must have been initia- 
 ted in the deepest mysteries of his art, and the very 
 guests have been taught from infancy, not to eat 
 with their knives, and how to conduct a conversa- 
 tion in which there must neither be ignorance, pe- 
 dantry, flippancy, or dulness. The four quarters of 
 the globe also send contributions to the entertain- 
 ment, and the wines perform at least one voyage to 
 India before Messrs. Cathcart and Ferguson think 
 them fit to be issued from their cellars at Leith. 
 
 We hear much discussion now, respecting a 
 railway through the vale of Strathmore to Aber- 
 
140 IISTERNESS. 
 
 deen, so the forests may be trembling on their 
 native hills, as a few strokes of the axe will soon 
 degrade them into sleepers for the railroads. The 
 Duke of Sutherland is said to have gained more 
 than .£100,000 by taking a tenth share in the rail- 
 way between Birmingham and Liverpool, which 
 cost five millions ; but where will money be found 
 sufficient to bore tunnels through the great mountains 
 of Aberdeenshire, or to raise viaducts between them ? 
 We now proceeded on our journey eastward, 
 passing Castle Stewart, a tall, narrow, square house, 
 built by the Regent Moray, and still most comforta- 
 bly habitable, having descended by inheritance to 
 the Earl of Moray, who is proprietor of so many 
 fine places, he must be at a loss sometimes to re- 
 member all their names. A group of thriving old 
 cherry-trees flourishes near the castle, transplanted 
 from Kent 150 years ago by Alexander Earl of 
 Moray. Buchanan mentions, in writing of the 
 " Good Regent," that " his house was like a holy 
 temple. After meals he caused *a chapter of the 
 Bible to be read, and asked the opinions of such 
 learned men as were present upon it, not out of 
 vain curiosity, but from a desire to learn, and re- 
 duce to practice what it contained." The fruits of 
 such a life were exhibited in the truly Christian 
 spirit of forgiveness with which he met his death, 
 on the tragical day of his murder at Linlithgow. 
 
NAIRN. 141 
 
 "When changing horses at the neat httle city of 
 Nairn, I saw, near the inn, that singularly unfortu- 
 nate being, James Mitchell, now forty-five years old, 
 the son of a clergyman, respecting whom Professor 
 Dugald Stewart read an interesting paper once be- 
 fore the Royal Society. He is quite an anomaly in 
 nature, being born without the faculties of speech, 
 sight, or hearing, yet displaying some glimmering 
 intelligence of countenance and conduct. His ex- 
 istence must be a dreary blank, a living death, 
 without ever having enjoyed any of the sights or 
 sounds of life, and scarcely having Icnown any of 
 its affections. The most persevering and generous 
 kindness has been shown him by an amiable sister, 
 who invented several ingenious devices for communi- 
 cating what she wishes, by the touch of her fingers, 
 and she has deservedly obtained considerable influ- 
 ence over his naturally passionate and wilful dispo- 
 sition. To her he is docile and obedient, but all 
 his actions being regulated by mere impulse, na 
 idea of duty or principle can be conveyed to his 
 mind, his intellect, if he has any, being buried in 
 impenetrable darkness. How strange it would be, 
 to know what are the thoughts and feelings of such 
 a being ! He is said to have an almost preternatu- 
 ral acuteness of touch and smell, and his greatest 
 delight seems to be derived from handling carriages 
 when they stop near the inn, trying the elasticity of 
 
142 NAIRN. 
 
 their springs, and stroking the horses with great 
 caution. He touches and feels whatever is near 
 him, and seems gifted with astonishing curiosity, as 
 well as some invention, one instance of which is, 
 that when he wishes to ride, he places his hand 
 under his foot like a stirrup. He kneels during 
 family prayer, and when his father died, having 
 been led forward to touch the corpse, he shrunk 
 back with obvious horror, which may lead us to 
 suppose that he has some instinctive apprehension 
 of death. From that hour he never would sleep in 
 the bed where his father's body had been laid, but 
 some time afterwards, he took a stranger into that 
 apartment, and laid his own head back on the pillow 
 for a moment, having done which, he hurried his 
 companion towards the churchyard, and patted his 
 father's grave with his hand. How gratefully we 
 should enjoy, and carefully improve the faculties 
 given to ourselves, when we contrast the blessings 
 they bring us, with the mournful state of this poor 
 outcast, consigned to perpetual darkness, solitude, 
 and silence. We are often apt to think the blind 
 more cheerful than the deaf, not considering that 
 those who have lost their sight can only be amused 
 in society, and are then seen at their best, while 
 those who are deprived of hearing, may forget their 
 affliction over a book, but are reminded of it perpet- 
 ually in company. Did you ever hear of the Irish 
 
NAIRN. 143 
 
 clergyman who preached for the Bhnd Asylum for- 
 merly, and began by gravely remarking, " If all 
 the world were blind, what a melancholy sight it 
 would be !" 
 
 After passing through Nairn, we crossed " the 
 wutches' moor !" where Macbeth had his interview 
 with the withered old hags. Their dancing days 
 are over now, and besides, we were rather too early 
 for their cantrips, or for being favoured with any 
 predications of coming greatness to ourselves. No 
 grass ever grows where a witch's foot has trod, and 
 this " blasted heath" seems bare enough to prove for 
 certain, that on the very identical spot we saw they 
 appeared, and no other. We carefully kept our 
 gravity here, as you are probably aware, that if 
 any one smiles on a witch in the Highlands, his 
 mouth remains awry for ever afterwards. 
 
 In discussing, for the hundred-thousandth time, 
 the marvellous genius of Shakspeare and other ima- 
 ginative writers, I could not but lament that many 
 sensible persons consider it essential now, in edu- 
 cating children, to exclude entirely all works of 
 fancy, even when written for sacred purposes, ad- 
 hering rigidly to matters of fact, and preserving the 
 body without the spirit of thought. All depends, 
 no doubt, on the use made of that powerful faculty, 
 which may be degraded to vicious purposes or ex- 
 alted to the highest, and it was well observed, that as 
 
144 NAIRN. 
 
 the swan sings before it dies, it would have been 
 well if some poets had died before they sung, but 
 still, the abuse of a gift in some instances or in many, 
 does not warrant its utter extinction, and there are 
 uses for the imagination, important, not only to our 
 interests in time, but in eternity. The muse of 
 poetry has been degraded often to the vilest pur- 
 poses, and is yet so consecrated by Milton, Cowper, 
 Montgomery, and others, that I could not but com- 
 pare the contrast thus afforded, to the vulture's wing 
 soaring as high as that of the eagle, but while the 
 one shuns the brightness of meridian day, and 
 keeps his grovelling eye on earthly objects, the 
 other scans the very heavens and fixes his unflinch- 
 ing gaze on the dazzling orb of Hght. Religion 
 itself is directed more to the imagination than to the 
 senses, and I have often thought, in attencUng the 
 last sufferings of a Christian's death-bed, how glori- 
 ous is the triumph of that which is unseen, over that 
 w^hich is endured, when all the agonies of dissolution 
 are superseded and nearly forgotten amidst the faith 
 and hope with which an unseen eternity has been 
 joyfully anticipated, and in the vivid conception of 
 that blessedness which " eye hath not seen, nor ear 
 heard, neither hath it entered into the heart of man 
 to conceive." 
 
 We admired beyond expression the pine-covered 
 hills, like those of Norway, and the five miles of 
 
BRODIE CASTLE. 145 
 
 forest around Darnaway Castle, where the richly 
 wooded grounds exhibit trees enough to make a 
 railroad round the world. I never now see a plan- 
 tation without thinking of the saw-mill, and it is a 
 melancholy connection of ideas, like Xerxes weeping 
 over his followers, because in fifty years they could 
 exist no longer. 
 
 The park round Brodie Castle is charmingly 
 wooded. One half of the house is old, like the 
 family pedigree, and an elegant new front-breadth 
 has been added, giving all the light and comfort 
 which very ancient houses so seldom afford, I re- 
 cognised Burn's touch at once, for architects, like 
 painters, have a style not to be mistaken. The re- 
 cent appendix is rapidly assmning an appearance of 
 antiquity, and dressing itself up in festoons of ivy, 
 which will cause it to harmonize admirably with the 
 rest, so that, before many years, they will appear a 
 very suitable match. 
 
 The ceiling of one beautiful old room here is 
 adorned by the richest dark oak carving in Scotland. 
 It would make the fortune of a dozen sideboards 
 and cabinets, being sculptured with the minuteness 
 of seal-engraving, and there are eagles, cupids, 
 unicorns, flowers, and fruit, all in full relief, the 
 whole effect being so handsome, that I am scarcely 
 surprised the fashion of ornamented roofs has been 
 13 
 
146 BRODIE CASTLE. 
 
 restored, and that people expend more on their cor- 
 nices than on their carpets. 
 
 The family portraits here possess an additional 
 interest to us, respecting ancestors from whom we 
 ourselves are descended, but the first of my progen- 
 itors to whom I was introduced, Emilia Brodie, made 
 so extraordinary a grimace at me, that I shall never 
 forget it. The painter had evidently intended a 
 bewitching smile, and hazarded a distortion of fea- 
 tures, such as might probably be the effect of eating 
 the sourest of all lemons. In another apartment ap- 
 peared the beautiful portrait of a young girl about 
 sixteen, with whom I hastened to claim kindred, 
 
 when A , in a most provokingly matter-of-fact 
 
 manner, investigated the case, and discovered that it 
 was a plain elder sister who married into our family. 
 
 A very animated, but by no means beautiful, 
 Flora Macdonald was there, looking like a clever 
 schoolmistress, but not by any means realizing my 
 previous conception of that celebrcited heroine. 
 Here also we admired the twentieth original of 
 Charles the First, by Vandyke, which I have seen, 
 and the monarch must certainly have sat vis a vis 
 to the artist all his life, to produce so interminable 
 a succession of portraits, — generally representing 
 Charles the First with his head on, and riding a 
 melancholy gray horse. It was a strange circum- 
 
BRODIE CASTLE. 147 
 
 stance, recorded by Lord Southampton, that the 
 night after his Majesty's execution, having been 
 permitted to watch beside the body, he heard at 
 midnight the heavy tread of some one coming up 
 stairs, the door then slowly opened, and a man, 
 muffled in his cloak and concealing his face, but 
 strongly resembling Oliver Cromwell in air and 
 voice, approached the bier, gazed at it for some time, 
 shook his head, sighed, and withdrew, saying, in a 
 melancholy tone, " cruel necessity !" How extraor- 
 dinary was the combination of enthusiasm and 
 hypocrisy in the Protector's character, " Forced, 
 though it grieved his soul, to reign alone !" 
 
 Our connoiseurships thought very highly of one 
 fine picture by Murillo, representing, as usual, a boy 
 laughing, so extremely natural that you would have 
 listened to hear the burst that seems coming. Some 
 children were frightened one day while looking at 
 it, and said, " that man is always laughing at us !" 
 How very early in life, the terror of being laughed 
 at commences, and, like most other instincts of 
 nature, though useful in moderation, it becomes per- 
 nicious in excess. 
 
 Rembrandt was the greatest admirer of wrinkled 
 old women who ever held a brush, but in one of his 
 pictures here, he condescended to paint a young 
 man not yet in the vale of years, and another ex- 
 ception to general rule was a portrait actually un- 
 
148 BRODIE CASTLE. 
 
 faded, by Sir Joshua Reynolds, of a beautiful lady 
 and child. 
 
 In the spacious dining-room at Brodie Castle, 
 modern portraits and landscapes are hung promis- 
 cuously, like a morsel of Somerset House arrived in 
 the Highlands, and the subject of one picture in the 
 entrance-hall, was what no other artist before or 
 since appears ever to have thought of selecting. 
 You remember the story of King John ordering a 
 Jew's teeth to be all successively drawn, till he con- 
 fessed where his treasures were concealed, and here 
 he is, in the very act of endurance, represented so 
 naturally that I almost heard him scream. If 
 Hutchins or Nasmyth had been the operators, he 
 might have kept his secret for ever, as patients have 
 declared they scarcely knew when the deed was 
 done, while some even protest it is almost a plea- 
 sure, but this painting commemorated tooth-drawing 
 in the old school, and seemed so horribly true to life, 
 I should soon have felt a toothache with looking at it. 
 
 I have often wondered how it happens that den- 
 tists are almost invariably great encouragers of 
 sculpture and painting ! We lately heard, that 
 when Cartwright, who makes one of the largest 
 professional fortunes in London, bespoke a picture 
 by Landseer, he enclosed him in payment a blank 
 order on the Bank of England, to be filled up a dis^ 
 cretion ! and the wife of a celebrated dentist, some 
 
FORRES. 149 
 
 time since, out-bid every competitor, for some beau- 
 tiful work of art, which was long and keenly con- 
 tested, but I could not help laughing when told, that 
 in the triumph of success, she exclaimed, " It will 
 be of great use to divert our patients in the opera- 
 tion room !" I scarcely think even Hogarth could 
 succeed there; but this representation of the Jew 
 would serve as very appropriate scenery and deco- 
 ration for such a torture chamber. 
 
 "How far is't call'd to Forres 1" Shakspeare, 
 hem ! The town of Forres may be recognised at 
 any distance, or in any picture, by the round, hedge- 
 hog-shaped hill of Clunie, which raises its dark 
 well-covered head immediately behind the streets, 
 surmounted by another of the many ugly monuments 
 by wliich Nelson's memory has been commemo- 
 rated. I wish people had more taste ! We toiled 
 up twice in one day to admire a splendid view from 
 the summit of this eminence, and, when the sun was 
 
 setting in brilliant style, A had the barbarity 
 
 to propose a third expedition, but there are limits to 
 what a rational being can undertake, and I sighed 
 over the hill instead of ascending it. 
 
 Not quite half a mile from Forres, stands pro- 
 bably the most ancient piece of history in Great 
 Britain. To commemorate the final retreat from 
 Scotland of the Danish king Sueno, a dark gray 
 stone was erected, measuring about twenty feet 
 13* 
 
150 FORRES. 
 
 perpendicularly above ground, and supposed to 
 penetrate almost equally far underneath. The 
 whole shaft is in one unbroken piece, and must have 
 travelled from some unknown distance, as no such 
 stone can be found in all that neighbourhood. On 
 the surface is carved a hieroglyphic representation 
 of the whole Danish army, some on foot and others 
 on horseback, some with heads, and others without, 
 the drawing and execution being nearly equal to 
 what may be seen on cakes of gingerbread at a fair. 
 The material is so very hard a granite, that those 
 who executed the devices must have possessed strong 
 hands and good chisels. Few works of man have 
 remained so long unchanged on this earth, where 
 " monuments themselves memorials need," while the 
 frail beings who raised it, could scarcely have anti- 
 cipated how many ages would roll over their for- 
 gotten graves, w^hile this only record should remain 
 of their ever having existed at all. 
 
 Being much interested in this very ancient relic, 
 I hurried to the landlady at Forres, with a multitude 
 of questions about her venerable neighbour, but she 
 civilly replied, with a look of indifference, " I've 
 often he'erd tell of that auld stane, but I never saw 
 
 it !" A wished her to start off instantly, as the 
 
 evening was fine, that not another day might be 
 added to the many she had already lost, but we 
 could not light up a single spark of interest or en- 
 
SANQUHAR HOUSE. 151 
 
 thusiasm ! A dish of whipped cream would have 
 excited her curiosity ten times more ardently, and 
 the hoary pillar of Forres may stand there as long 
 as it has stood already, before she moves a yard to 
 behold it ! Our hostess would make an exemplary 
 quaker, as one of their superstitions is never to go 
 sight-seeing, probably thinking, that after female 
 curiosity having done so much harm originally, it 
 should always now be kept in check. I once asked 
 a quaker lady, recently returned from Orkney, what 
 she thought of the fine cathedral at Kirkwall, when 
 she replied, with a cold reproving look, " I believe 
 we passed it!" The quakers have a rule also 
 against dressed dishes, and their whole dinners con- 
 sist of plain joints, apparently on the plan of your 
 friend who always ordered an additional chicken for 
 every additional visiter, till at last sixteen hungry 
 guests sat down to sixteen roasted fowls ; but this 
 would not have suited our good landlady, who is by 
 no means of the Mary Stedman school, but was 
 quite a " professed cook." She had acted the part 
 of Mrs. Couch or Pouch for many years at Brodie 
 Castle, and sent us up for dinner a complete page 
 of Mrs. Glass, or Meg Dodds, copied to the very 
 life. 
 
 Sanquhar House, near Forres, the property of 
 Mr. Fraser Tytler, is very charmingly situated, com- 
 manding a fine view of nearly a whole county, and 
 
152 DARNAWAY CASTLE. 
 
 of a rich landscape, reaching even to the Caithness 
 hills. The house itself is rather too much in the 
 gable-end school of architecture to suit my fancy, 
 but it may perhaps please other people. A former 
 proprietor of this estate became bankrupt, sold the 
 estate, and, in his old age, wandered as a beggar to 
 that very door where once he had been proprietor ! 
 Many would rather have starved. 
 
 We remained all Sunday at Forres, and next 
 morning hired horses for the day, to see how much 
 of this neighbourhood they could contrive to show 
 us. You may remember the old lady who used to 
 say that " if she killed a pair of post-horses with 
 fatigue one day, they came alive the next morning," 
 and really ours achieved wonders yesterday, though 
 I forgot to ask whether to-day they had been re- 
 suscitated or not. 
 
 When we were about to proceed, under a bril- 
 liant sunshine, towards Darnaway Castle, notice was 
 brought, that during the late hurricane, so many 
 trees had been blown down across the new approach, 
 the road was impassable. This threatened a com- 
 plete discomfiture, but fortunately we were driven 
 by an old experienced post-boy — drivers remain 
 always boys — who had plied backwards and for- 
 wards here during thirty years. He took us towards 
 a gate, flanked by a large arbitrary ticket, forbidding 
 all access for carriages in that direction, but he 
 
DARNAWAY CASTLE. 153 
 
 pointed at it contemptuously with the end of his whip, 
 saying, in a triumphant tone, " We'll get through 
 for a' that !" Accordingly our daring wheels rolled 
 on iminterruptedly, and the very difficulties added 
 to my enjoyment on finally succeeding. The park 
 scenery is here magnificent — such immeasurable ex- 
 tent, and such an unbounded profusion of trees, 
 though none are of very pre-eminent size, and is 
 framed in by a great fir forest, by the ocean, and by 
 the distant mountains of Sutherland and Caithness. 
 Lord Moray's family motto is a key to all reli- 
 gion, " Salvation through Christ the Redeemer ;" 
 and it is a remarkable circumstance, that the late 
 earl had his coffin prepared, and constantly kept in 
 his bed-room, during many years previous to his 
 death, which must certainly have acted as a per- 
 petual admonition, though one of the greatest mys- 
 teries in our nature is, the impossibility, almost, of 
 realizing that we are ourselves to die, even though 
 we make it oxir daily duty to reflect on it and to be 
 ready. It seems easily said, and frequently talked 
 of, that death is inevitable, but to feel the actual 
 consciousness that this busy world shall go on as 
 busily for ages after we are buried, as it did for the 
 ages before we were born — that our bodies shall be 
 imprisoned for centuries, perhaps, in dark and dreary 
 separation from the soul, and that our spirits, in the 
 meantime, shall awake to instant consciousness. 
 
154 DARNAWAY CASTLE. 
 
 amidst a scene unutterably wonderful, where we 
 must for ever and ever exist — all this bursts upon 
 our thoughts occasionally, with that awe and aston- 
 ishment which it is fitted to create, but amidst the 
 varied occupations of life, how often it seems as new 
 and surprising in all its solemn reality, as if we had 
 never before imagined that death could be to us in- 
 dividually, as real as it has been to others, and that 
 we are hurrying along on the irresistible tide which 
 shall plunge us into eternity. 
 
 Darnaway Castle is about thirty years of age, 
 and no great beauty in external aspect. Though 
 built of the very finest freestone, in a situation ex- 
 ceedingly magnificent, yet taking it as a house, this 
 large pile of building is more handsome than beau- 
 tiful. The front is Grecian, the ornaments over the 
 windows Gothic, and the turrets are like eau-de- 
 Cologne bottles. The point of chief interest at 
 Darnaway Castle is Randolph's Hall, built by the 
 celebrated nephew of Robert Bruce, a fine baronial 
 apartment five centuries old, in magnificent propor- 
 tion, being more than a hundred feet long. It is 
 canopied thirty feet high by an arched roof of oak, 
 like that of Westminster Hall, perfectly blackened 
 by time, and it is floored with stone flags. The in- 
 ternal appearance resembles that of a fine old parish 
 church without pews, and the only seats consist of 
 some very antique benches, with richly carved sides, 
 
DARNAWAY CASTLE. 155 
 
 and various extraordinary oak chairs, all of differ- 
 ent shapes, and carved in a variety of whimsical pat- 
 terns. These seats were assuredly used before the 
 word " comfort" had been invented. If such chairs 
 were still in universal fashion, fewer country gen- 
 tlemen would become sleepy and apoplectic after 
 dinner, as, instead of spring cushions, the very seats 
 are elaborately carved, and looked by no means 
 inviting to sit upon. 
 
 Lord Randolph's table is also in a very unso- 
 phisticated style, being nearly as it came originally 
 from the neighbouring forest, and every thing with- 
 in this primitive old hall is formed of these two ma- 
 terials, wood and stone. Most unfortunately the 
 architect who spoiled the new house, thought it ne- 
 cessary to spoil the old one also, and he has exhib- 
 ited his taste by modernizing the windows into 
 something very like those of a dissenting chapel, 
 and, dreadful to relate, the grand sweep of an arch, 
 which once formed the chimney, and where a car- 
 riage might almost have been turned round, is now 
 lowered and narrowed, so that an ox would find 
 some difficulty in being roasted whole there. Very 
 few architects are fit to be trusted in an ancient 
 house, for the new parts too often say no to the an- 
 tiquity of the old. A painter might as well have 
 attempted to touch up a Raphael, as a modern builder 
 to improve Randolph's Hall, but builders all run 
 
156 DARNAWAY CASTLE. 
 
 mad whenever they get into an old house, and either 
 knock down, mutilate, or disfigure it. 
 
 The ancestors at Darnaway Castle have a more 
 aristocratic air than in most other places, all having 
 sat, apparently, to the best artists, in the full dress 
 trappings of their rank and station, stars, ribbons, 
 robes, and garters, looking " every inch a peer." 
 Some of the ladies wore large elaborate ruffs, so 
 white and stiff, you might have fancied their heads 
 were placed on silver salvers, and one collar, in 
 particular, we noticed, which a modern milliner 
 might have despaired of imitating, while the lady's 
 face who wore it, had faded so much, that she 
 seemed sitting in a fainting fit. 
 
 The most curious portrait of all was Queen 
 Mary, disguised, by way of a frolic, in boy's clothes ! 
 She wore long scarlet stockings, black velvet coat, 
 black kilt, white sleeves, and such a ruff! Her 
 Majesty was looking as grave and serious upon 
 this extraordinary piece of jocularity, as if she had 
 been receiving the reproof she merited from John 
 Knox. 
 
 We ended our inspection of Darnaway Castle 
 as usual on the roof, which displays a perfect map 
 of Scotland, from the best authorities. I dare not 
 guess how many counties we saw at once, including 
 fifty miles of hilly coast, a world of wood extending 
 twenty miles, the sea, and a circle of snow-speckled 
 
DARNAWAY CASTLE. 157 
 
 movmtains. On an eminence like this, we ought to 
 borrow the eyes of an eagle. 
 
 A vei-y celebrated and beautiful heronry belongs 
 to Lord Moray near this, on the Findhorn, and when 
 I stood upon the towering pinnacles, two hundred 
 feet high, from which the birds may be watched to 
 most advantage, the river, rocks, and wood, seemed 
 an exact counterpart of Wyndcliff on the Wye, quite 
 magnificently romantic. A shouted and clap- 
 ped his hands, after which more than a hundred 
 herons took wing, and soared through the air at so 
 slow and dignified a rate, that they might easily 
 have been shot, though herons are so tenacious of 
 life, that they have generally to be fired at twice, or 
 even oftener. After being wounded, these birds are 
 very unsafe to deal with, because they fly at a 
 sportsman with fury, endeavouring to peck out his 
 eyes, and their strength is considerable, as a heron 
 can carry with ease to his nest, a fish, weighing up- 
 wards of a pound. Each nest seemed almost large 
 enough to hold a moderate sized man, and I counted 
 above twenty nests in one elm, which must be apt 
 to break down the branches, some of which are so 
 festooned with them, that you might fancy a fishing 
 net had been suspended over all the trees. The 
 whole colony interested me extremely, and I felt 
 
 quite sorry when A came up at last, like one 
 
 of the London police, desiring me to " move on." 
 14 
 
158 ALTYRE. 
 
 Our next step was through a scene of ahnost 
 unearthly beauty, to Altyre, the most lovely and 
 loveable place you can conceive, belonging to Sir 
 William Gumming Gordon, chief of the clan Gum- 
 ming, and representative of the old Lords of Bade- 
 noch. The house is a perfect cluster of arbours and 
 green-houses, apparently meant for the muses and 
 graces, for pleasure, gayety, and romance, but never 
 intended for the mere vulgar, ordinary purposes of 
 life. Within, without, and around, you see nothing 
 but flowers rushing in at every window, and beset- 
 tino- all the doors. This is the court of Flora her- 
 self, and you would suppose we had come for a hor- 
 ticultural show ! 
 
 The approach commences through a dark fii-- 
 wood, springing up amidst purple heath ; and grad- 
 ually, as we advanced, the grounds became enriched 
 with evergreens, varied by forest trees, and bor- 
 dered with turf round the house. The green lawn 
 is like Genoa velvet, studded with fuschias, gerani- 
 ums, carnations, every flower, in short, that has a 
 name, overshadowed by graceful walnut trees, and 
 the entrance hall emits the fragrance and atmos- 
 phere of a conservatory. Your friend, who said she 
 could not sleep for three nights after seeing a better 
 garden than her own, would never have closed an 
 eye had she visited at Altyre. What do the quakers 
 think of Nature for dressing in such gaudy colours ? 
 
ALTYRE. 159 
 
 But, as Dr. Johnson says, " a man who is unfit for 
 a better world in a blue coat, is not very likely to 
 go there in a gray." It is a perpetual miracle cer- 
 tainly, to see the dark, dingy earth, hourly produ- 
 cing those brilliant and fragrant blossoms with 
 which such a scene is decorated, like our own 
 barren minds, in which there is no good by nature, 
 and which require the seed to be sown in them, and 
 the sunshine of heaven to nourish those flow^ers of 
 excellence, and those fruits of holiness, which can 
 alone render them lovely or attractive. 
 
 In the garden of Eden, probably, the flowers 
 never would have faded, but they suffer the penalty, 
 like all creation, of our frailty and guilt. It is very 
 remarkable, that no flower is perfectly black ! they 
 are the toys and gems of nature, given as an inno- 
 cent recreation, suited to every age and every rank, 
 equally calculated for our seasons of joy or of 
 sorrow — of sickness or of health. Though the 
 moral lesson that they teach speaks of short-hved 
 prosperity, decay, and death, for truly " the loveliest 
 things on earth are those that soonest fade away ;" 
 yet these touching recollections are brought to mind 
 under an aspect of beauty and cheerfulness, calcu- 
 lated to testify with how much bounty and goodness 
 the pleasures of life are sent to alleviate its sorrows. 
 Those who find the thorns of life unembellished by 
 its flowers, may generally blame themselves for 
 
160 ALTYRE. 
 
 seeking in the artificial dissipations of the world, 
 what can be found only in those natural enjoyments 
 provided for us by our wise and beneficent Creator. 
 Moral writers have often remarked, that the gay 
 and transient flowers are scattered on the world's 
 surface, while the more precious and durable metals 
 must be laboriously dug for ; but, while the deepest 
 mines should be explored, the lovely blossoms need 
 not be neglected, and I never enjoy a flower-garden 
 like this, without feeling convinced it aflfords one of 
 the few amusements of which it would be impos- 
 sible to tire. The bee sipping its draught in every 
 flower, scarcely obeys the instinct of nature more 
 naturally than we do when inhaling their fragrance, 
 and admiring their lovely forms ; and the Bible re- 
 peatedly directs our devout attention to flowers. 
 How truly may we say, when contemplating a 
 richly decorated garden, " Solomon, in all his glory, 
 was not arrayed like one of these !" 
 
 " How happily, how happily the flowers die away ! 
 Oh ! could we but return to earth as easily as they ; 
 Just live a life of sunshine, of innocence, and bloom, 
 Then drop without decrepitude or pain into the tomb." 
 
 This busy day seemed a fortnight long, we said, 
 did, and saw so much. I pity every body who has 
 not seen Altyre, and was shocked to hear that a 
 situation has been fixed on for a new house ; but if 
 
MOY HOUSE. 161 
 
 the old one be deserted, the Queen of the Fairies 
 will certainly take possession, as it seems already- 
 fitted up on purpose for her summer residence. 
 
 We dined with the Miss Cummings at Moy 
 House, where the old garden enchanted me, being 
 ornamented with the finest "gmn," alias wild 
 cheriy, trees in Scotland, which had attained the 
 size of respectable forest trees, and were bending 
 beneath the weight of their fruit ; and here, during 
 last summer, by no means commendable for being 
 either warm or dry, peaches ripened in abundance 
 on the open, unflued wall ! The gardener at Moy 
 gained a prize this season for that curious plant, the 
 Hoya Carnosa, the large clustering flowers of which 
 resemble a ready made honeycomb, with a drop of 
 honey hanging from each petal, the whole being 
 modelled in a substance so exactly resembling wax, 
 that you might almost make it into candles. The 
 bees would give over working if they saw this 
 flower, and no plant was ever more easily propa- 
 gated, seeing that a single green leaf, carelessly 
 stuck in the ground, will take root, and become fit 
 for a horticultural show before the following year. 
 
 Moy House belonged, in the previous generation, 
 to an old humourist, who became so indignant at his 
 next heir, Mr. Grant, then of Red Castle, for calling 
 on him one day, in a carriage and four, that he 
 altered his will, bequeathing his property to a per- 
 14* 
 
162 MOY HOUSE. 
 
 fectly different Mr. Grant, who was probably satis- 
 fied with a chaise and pair. We heard of a more 
 prudent and successful heir presumptive elsewhere, 
 who always left his equipage at the neighbouring 
 inn, put on a shabby coat, and walked, stick in 
 hand, to the house, a plan much to be recommended 
 where an eccentric old gentleman is in question. 
 Wills and marriages are both generally sp very 
 whimsical and unaccountable, that I have ceased to 
 wonder at either ; and if ever wealthy old people 
 are to exhibit caprice and bad feeling, it seems 
 chiefly reserved for the last will. There must be a 
 great degree of infidelity in those w^ho leave behind 
 them a testament which they would be ashamed 
 while alive, that the world should see, not apparent- 
 ly reflecting, that when this posthumous deed is 
 read, the testator shall be already in the presence 
 of a Holy God, who condemns every angry feeling, 
 and who will make us responsible for the conscien- 
 tious disposal of all we have, and all we leave 
 behind. 
 
 A gentleman who had been whistling by the 
 fireside for an hour one day, beside a numerous cir- 
 cle of visiters, at last exclaimed, as if bringing forth 
 the result of his meditations, " I wonder nobody 
 ever left me any money !" This is a subject of 
 wonder often, I dare say, to others who say less 
 about it, but, like all earthly pleasures, even a legacy 
 
MOY HOUSE. 163 
 
 has its drawbacks, as it implies the loss of a friend 
 whose attachment was far more precious, and, there- 
 fore, even for the most mercenary this is the last 
 way in which one could desire to grow rich. When 
 a lady remarked once, what a pleasure it would he, 
 succeeding unexpectedly to some rich relation whom 
 you did not care for, another very coolly replied, 
 " Or to one you do care for ! it would be all one in 
 a month ! look at the sons and brothers who inherit 
 estates !" It certainly would be curious if, by 
 magical agency, the hue of people's dress could be- 
 come in exact accordance with the hue of their 
 spirits ! Then it would be seen that those who 
 seem gay, cheerful, and reckless, are frequently suf- 
 fering under the darkest despondency, while in the 
 case of successions it w^ould often become obvious 
 that there had been more bombazine and crape than 
 real sorrow ; but I wish the old proprietor of Moy 
 had seen us arrive in our humble chaise, and be- 
 queathed me this smiling place, so well-wooded, so 
 highly cultivated, and altogether so enjoyable. 
 Perhaps what contributed most of all to make me 
 like this house might be, the pleasant circle within 
 doors, which would make any residence dehghtful ; 
 but the cmtain has dropped over it, and the sunshine 
 of that evening must live only in my memory, where 
 it will always remain as a pleasing remembrance. 
 The motto of our family, " J'aime le mellieur," is 
 
164 MOY HOUSE. 
 
 certainly my case in respect to the society we meet, 
 and we have hitherto been very fortunate. A 
 coachmaker once, by mistake, altered, most distress- 
 ingly, the meaning of these words on our shield, by 
 substituting an inscription with which our carriage 
 drove about for several years, but I believe the poor 
 man did not really mean any jest when he painted 
 it " Jamais le mellieur !" 
 
 I remain, 
 
 For self and partner, 
 
 Yours. 
 
MORAYSHIRE 
 
 The braes ascend like lofty wa's, 
 The foamin' stream deep roaring fa's 
 O'erhung \vi' fragrant spreading shaws. 
 
 Burns. 
 
 My dear Cousin, — As there are said to be fif- 
 teen days more of summer in Morayshire, than in 
 any other part of Scotland, we seem to have ob- 
 tained a lease of them all at once ! The weather 
 has been most enchanting lately, and is altogether 
 doing the civil thing by us, being exactly such as 
 we require for perfect happiness. I remember the 
 time, when you and I used to wish the weather of 
 the whole world might be regulated so as to suit 
 our one solitary geranium in a flower-pot ; and how 
 apt I am still to think, if the fields be burned as dry 
 and brown as a slice of toast, that it matters little, 
 provided my own bonnet escape a shower, though, 
 I dare say, the farmers would vote me a new one, 
 rather than do without rain another day. It is 
 lucky we are not allowed a voice on the subject, 
 for even sunshine itself might be indulged in to 
 excess. 
 
 We have this day enjoyed, at Reluglas, the 
 
166 MORAYSHIRE. 
 
 highest perfection of glen scenery, quite an exag- 
 geration of RosUn, formerly belonging to one of our 
 leading Whig orators, and the author of several 
 very popular works. Sir Thomas Dick Lauder, but 
 recently purchased by Mr. M'Killigan, a native of 
 this neighbourhood. We were told, that from his 
 earliest years, he had almost hopelessly desired to 
 possess this exquisite place, and after realizing an 
 adequate sum, during one successful voyage to 
 China, by a happy coincidence he returned at the 
 very time it was sold, and realized his juvenile cas- 
 tle in the air. Who would not go to China to-mor- 
 row for so delightful a result 1 It is seldom men 
 gain so precisely the point they aim at, and I hope 
 the new proprietor may long continue to enjoy it 
 as he does now, and to embellish the place as taste- 
 fully as he has begun. The grounds are covered 
 with a perfect eruption of roses, besides being studded 
 over with rare plants of great value, and of most 
 uncommon aspect, imported by Mr. M'Killigan him- 
 self The Horticultural Society of London, when 
 vainly trying to naturalize the beautiful variegated 
 azalia, of which we saw several plants quite at 
 home here, expended no less than .£300, while Mr. 
 Wright, a nurseryman, paid .£100 for one speci- 
 men, and has since realized jEIOOO by propagating 
 and selling it. 
 
 The interior of this house is beautifully fitted up 
 
RELUGLAS. 167 
 
 ^vlth English comfort and Asiatic decorations, but 
 the collection of corals alone might occupy agreea- 
 bly more hours than we could spend on the entire 
 place. They resemble the minutest carvings in 
 ivory, some representing a little forest of plants, 
 while others were little circular worlds, formed by 
 a combination among myriads of living atoms, which 
 thus raise habitations for themselves, and increase 
 their nimaber, till at last they gradually expand to 
 such a bulk, that they become islands large enough 
 for man himself to exist on ! What will not perse- 
 verance do ! One coral island, examined by Cap- 
 tain Beechy, was thirty miles in diameter, and many 
 of the South Sea islands began their existence in the 
 w^orld on a scale not larger than those masses of 
 coral which we weighed in our hands. What a 
 lesson this might be on the importance of little 
 things ! drops make the ocean, moments make the 
 year, and trifles life. 
 
 At Reluglas, the small remains of an ancient 
 vitrified fort, served as a treat to antiquaries formerly, 
 but the gardener once, in a fit of ingenuity, thought 
 he could improve this old relic by building a massy 
 wall round the spot, over which he scattered a top- 
 dressing of the vitrified material, looking like frag- 
 ments of broken bottles, and now the whole is me- 
 tamorphosed into a perfect deformity. 
 
 Travellers who merely skirt along the highroads 
 
168 RELUGLAS. 
 
 of Scotland, can form no conception how much they 
 miss by not tracing up such glens as those of the 
 Findhorn and Divie, bounded by banks, hills, forests, 
 and heath-covered mountains, without one barren 
 spot to disfigure the landscape. The whole scene 
 is enlivened too, by places which are the very ro- 
 mance of Highland residences, every one fit to form, 
 the frontispiece to any poem you ever read. We 
 might imagine the house of Reluglas had wandered 
 over from Switzerland, with its overhanging roof, 
 like a slouched hat, and its deep casements, trimmetjM 
 with fliowers, while the elegant mansion of Dunphail, 
 built on a plan by Playfair, seems inside and out as 
 if it were imported ready-made from Italy. Do you 
 remember our being diverted once at a lady who 
 had spent a summer at Naples, and came home, 
 completely Italianized, saying to you at dinner, 
 soon aftei'wards, in a tone of disgust, "Fancy me 
 with my Italian appetite, set down to roast beeef !" 
 But here she might have lived in happy content- 
 ment, surrounded by books, pictures, ornaments, 
 every thing, — even the very sky, Italian. 
 
 Nothing is more surprising, in these glens, than 
 to observe the clever way in which trees contrive 
 to root themselves on stones, when they have liter- 
 ally nothing but the rifted rocks to hold by, and to 
 live upon. The fibres are at first no larger than 
 bits of thread, penetrating every crevice, and grad- 
 
DUNPHAIL. 169 
 
 ually enlarging into cables, till at length they be- 
 come strong enough to elbow the very rocks from 
 their stations. Many large blocks of stone have 
 thus been precipitated downwards, while the trees, 
 clasping and riveting their arms around the remain- 
 ing rocks, look down into the abyss beneath, and 
 cling to their places with the tenacity of a states- 
 man. 
 
 The grounds at Dunphail are of a softer and 
 more English character than those of Reluglas ; the 
 verdant hills, opening with a graceful sweep on 
 each side, and charmingly varied by a crowd of dis- 
 tant foliage, while near the house we admired 
 groups of prodigious forest trees, as round and grace- 
 ful as ostrich feathers. When the wind blew over 
 their lofty tops, and bent them towards the earth, I 
 could not but think, how apt an emblem they ex- 
 hibit of our own minds, so easily agitated, so soon 
 almost prostrated by the sweeping blast of sorrow or 
 misfortune, yet so speedily restored again to that 
 comparative rest and peace which are habitual to 
 those who can rightly apply that sacred text, " The 
 wind bloweth where it listeth, and thou hearest the 
 sound thereof, but canst not tell whence it cometh, 
 and whither it goeth : so is every one that is born 
 of the Spirit." 
 
 The river here is truly enchanting, and we saw 
 from the house of Dimphail, a beautifully situated 
 15 
 
170 DUNPHAIL. 
 
 ruinous castle, surrounded by a deep ravine, to which 
 belongs a fine old tradition, worth its weight in 
 gold. The story has been potted and preserved so 
 long, that you must try a taste of it now ; and I 
 liked beyond measure thus to read the book of his- 
 tory, in folio, by standing on the very spot where all 
 its events actually occurred, and almost beholding 
 the very individuals living, acting, and dying, as 
 they did many centuries ago. I often think, what 
 an extraordinary picture gallery it would make, if 
 a representation were supernaturally to appear on 
 the silent walls of every old building, showing the 
 strange scenes they have witnessed since the hour of 
 their being built. The very rooms we ourselves 
 daily inhabit, could testify of joys and sorrows, now 
 for ever forgotten, which once agitated the hearts 
 of many lying at rest in the tomb ; and those walls 
 which have echoed the laughter orthegrief of those 
 who are no more, and of those who yet survive, will 
 hereafter be the property of unborn generations, to 
 whom our existence will be a tale of old times. 
 
 These thoughts on our own unconsciousness of 
 what once passed within the walls around us, were 
 particularly impressed upon me some years ago, 
 when we heard that a family who had hired a coun- 
 try residence near Edinburgh, where they enjoyed 
 many cheerful hours round the fireside, having oc- 
 casion once to lift the drawing-room hearth-stone, 
 
DUNPHAIL. 171 
 
 were startled and shocked to find immediately under- 
 neath, the ghastly spectacle of a skeleton in chains ! 
 This house had belonged to Chesely of Dairy, who 
 was hanged for assassinating Lockhart of Carnwath, 
 the president of the Court of Sessions, and the crim- 
 inal's own family having stolen the body off the 
 gallows, had privately buried it there. So frightful 
 a spectacle was like some apparition from another 
 world J but nothing so terrifying appeared in the 
 old castle of Dunphail, formerly the scene of many 
 bold and daring actions. 
 
 The Cummings were among the greatest and 
 bravest of all the Highland clans ; and King Robert 
 Bruce, who wished to exterminate them, created 
 Randolph, his own nephew, Earl of Moray, and 
 being in a generous mood, granted him this estate. 
 Old Gumming of Dunphail, not seeing the eligibility 
 of that arrangement, resisted the transfer, and sus- 
 tained a long siege within this castle. Meantime 
 his son, Alister Bane, a young man of extraordinary 
 enterprise and courage, preserved the famishing 
 garrison alive, by seizing opportunities occasionally 
 to throw in sacks of oatmeal across a deep fissure in 
 the rocks which we were shown. The enemy vainly 
 endeavom-ed to detect the place of his concealment, 
 until they brought a bloodhound to the spot, which 
 tracked him through the woods. Here we traced 
 every step of the ravine ourselves, till we reached 
 
172 DUNPHML. 
 
 the fatal cave where he was overtaken, the entrance 
 being no larger than that of a dog kennel, and there 
 his enemies lighted a fire that he might he smoked 
 to death. The young hero, seeing his fate inevita- 
 ble, attempted to come forth, saying, " Let me out 
 to die like a Gumming, sword in hand !" But Lord 
 Randolph cruelly thrust him back, and replied, " No ! 
 die like a wolf as you are !" 
 
 The head of Alister Bane was cut off, and car- 
 ried to a rock opposite, where old Gumming stood, 
 expecting the arrival of his son with provisions, and 
 there the enemy threw it at his feet, calling out, in 
 an insulting tone, " Here's beef for yom^ bannocks!" 
 The wretched father recognised his son, and ex- 
 claimed, in an agony of rage and grief, " This is a 
 bone to pick that you shall rue !" Discouraged, 
 however, and subdued by so frightful a calamity, the 
 old man struggled no longer, but yielded to his 
 fate, and was put to death, with his forty faithful 
 clansmen. Their heads were stuck up in terrorem 
 at Elgin, and their mutilated bodies thrust into a 
 cairn near the spot where they fell, which was 
 shown ever afterwards as " the tomb of the headless 
 Cummings." A few years since, the parish clergy- 
 man caused the skeletons to be dug up, and carefully 
 buried in a distant church-yard, at the risk of des- 
 troying the evidence of this melancholy tale. Not 
 a single skull was found on that occasion, and I am 
 
DUNPHAIL. 173 
 
 always glad when proof can be brought, that tradi- 
 tion really has spoken the truth, though I cannot 
 but wish that the massacred clan had remonstrated 
 as successfully with their murderers, as the Baron of 
 Leys, " My head is a thing I cannot well want." 
 
 It is curious, that after a lapse of five hundred 
 years, this beautiful estate has again returned to the 
 rightful clan, while the names of both contending 
 parties are now united in the present proprietor, 
 Mr. Gumming Bruce. 
 
 The same glen at Dunphail became afterwards 
 celebrated as the refuge of a daring robber, whose 
 well selected abode, in the cleft of the rock, we in- 
 spected ; and this valley is now inhabited by a 
 couple of white fairies, who glide gracefully about 
 at night among the plantations, and the belief of 
 their existence diffused around the neighbourhood 
 is more effectual than either man-traps or springs 
 guns for keeping off poachers. 
 
 Strangers in this neighbourhood may be some- 
 times perplexed to hear how familiarly the inhabi- 
 tants talk of what happened to themselves " before 
 and after the flood !" not perhaps recollecting the 
 extraordinary inundations in Morayshire eleven 
 years ago, w^hen houses, bridges, castles, villages, 
 and inhabitants were all nearly swept from their 
 foundations, and involved in one common ruin. 
 Many people wish to be envied for their good for- 
 X5* 
 
174 DU>fPHAIL. 
 
 tune, but if that be out of the question, then the next 
 pleasure in Hfe is to excite very great pity, and for 
 that purpose a calamity like this ought to be made 
 the most of. Sir Thomas Dick Lauder's volume did 
 wonders, and really plunged me into a perfect cold 
 bath when I read it ; but he has got into consider- 
 able disgrace with one family, for having rather 
 spitefully under-stated their losses, and though he 
 nearly drowned them all, it is by no means consid- 
 ered satisfactory. 
 
 The scene at Dunphait on this occasion was de- 
 scribed to me as being like a great shipwreck. The 
 tumultuous Divie rushing like a wall of water down 
 the glen, and sweeping away in its mad career 
 bridges, mills, trees, cattle, and cottages, to the 
 value of j£5000. The very house itself was besieg- 
 ed by the raging stream, and though its foundation 
 is high and rocky, the inhabitants were advised to 
 hasten out for safety, which they all did with the 
 exception of a Highland dairy-maid, who insisted 
 with great courage on remaining, because it is con- 
 sidered " unlucky" to desert a house entirely. No 
 persuasion could induce her to move, so she was 
 forcibly ejected, and the proprietor himself remained 
 alone, to garrison the walls and to watch over the 
 fate of his beautiful residence. The water rose 
 higher and higher, the night had closed in darkness, 
 and the rock was crumbling fast away to within a 
 
BALGOWTSriE. 175 
 
 few feet of the corner wall, when suddenly a distant 
 bank broke down on an opposite side of the stream, 
 the current was thus unexpectedly drained off, and 
 the half-drowned house has now been restored by 
 the Humane Society to all its former life and love- 
 liness. At Ballindalloch, on the confluence of the 
 Avon and Spey, Sir George Macpherson Grant 
 found a carpet of gravel laid down in his dining- 
 room, and Spey salmon actually swimming about 
 alive in the kitchen ! In one village all the inhabi- 
 tants had to save themselves on rafts, and in many 
 farms the soil and crops sailed away, like floating 
 islands, to the ocean, which also received on that 
 day a valuable and unexpected cargo of hay-ricks, 
 sheep, chairs, eight-day clocks, tables, and every 
 variety of household furniture, moveables and fix- 
 tures. Nothing was half so remarkable in this ex- 
 traordinary calamity, as the courageous activity with 
 which the bold Highlanders met their misfortune, 
 testifying a heroic degree of Christian resignation 
 amidst unexpected ruin, and even in some affecting 
 instances encountering death itself. One poor man 
 risked his life to regain his spectacles, "because 
 without them he could not read his Bible !" The 
 brave old bridge of Balgownie, on the Don, five 
 hundred years old, put all younger structures to 
 shame, being almost the only one that withstood the 
 shock. It w^as built by Bishop Elphinstone, and 
 
176 BALGOWXIE. 
 
 endowed with a benefaction of <£2 per annum, 
 which has accumulated, under the trusty manage- 
 ment of the good magistrates at Aberdeen, to no 
 less a sum than <£S000. I wish they would take 
 your affairs and mine in trust also ! It is a curious 
 Highland superstition, that friends or lovers who 
 part on a bridge never meet again ! If my letter 
 were to stop on the bridge of Balgownie you would 
 probably never hear from me more, so I must add 
 one little appendix to this subject. 
 
 The former proprietor of Reluglas wishing very 
 naturally to commemorate the wonderful height to 
 which the Findhorn and Divie then rose, placed a 
 stone at the proper place, with an inscription to tes- 
 tify that there the two streams actually met, but a 
 mischievous traveller lately rooted up the stone and 
 carried it to a perfectly incredible eminence, where 
 it now stands gravely informing us that here is the 
 level to which the water rose. I make a point of 
 believing every thing, but was certainly rather as- 
 tonished how a living being had escaped ! Since 
 then, however, that difficulty has been solved on the 
 best authority, and the stone turns out to be some- 
 what of the nature of a tomb stone, which is apt to 
 exa";o^erate. 
 
 People who journalize their travels generally 
 become unsupportably dull, by attempting the sub- 
 lime, but I have rather kept to the ridiculous on 
 
BALGOWNIE. 177 
 
 this occasion, though with a more ambitious pen 
 the Morayshire floods could have been worked up 
 to a perfect Niagara. Pray consider yourself as 
 owing a visit to this neighbourhood until you have 
 paid one, which will not be your last or only de- 
 scent on a county so truly interesting, with its proud- 
 looking castles, its cottages of gentility, and all the 
 triumphs of nature and of art, with which it is 
 adorned. As the old song says, " I'll make you be 
 fain to follow me !" 
 
CASTLE GRANT. 
 
 There needs na' be sae great a phrase 
 Wi' droning dull Italian lays: 
 I wad na gi'e our ain strathspeys 
 
 For half a hundred score o' 'em. 
 
 Burns. 
 
 My dear Cousin, — ^Your life seems as uniform 
 at present as the pendulum of a clock, but from 
 your description it must be nearly as useful. In fact, 
 without meaning to be vain, I am like the minute 
 hand, making a complete circle, during the time 
 you take to revolve an inch or two, though the 
 chief interest of my movements arises from knowing 
 that you are behind the scenes to partake of them. 
 
 We this day diverged twenty miles off our road, 
 to inspect that strange old place. Castle Grant, be- 
 longing to the Earl of Seafield j a prodigious chief- 
 tain-like edifice, surrounded by grim-looking moun- 
 tains, and grim-looking fir trees, and filled with 
 grim-looking ancestors. Truly as " the dark build- 
 ing o'er the valley frown'd," it looked like the 
 stronghold of some great freebooter, which you 
 might feel terrified to approach after dark. Mrs. 
 Radcliffe would have been quite at home here, and 
 
CASTLE GRANT. 179 
 
 I could write a melo-drama myself on the spot; 
 — " Enter Rudolpko, cautiously, loith pistols — 
 
 Hark ! /" now fancy the rest, one or two 
 
 murders, an apparition, plenty of poison, and sev- 
 eral executions. 
 
 We were hurrying along the high-road to take 
 a glance at this ancient fossil of a castle, when a 
 respectable looking old man stopped us, touched 
 his bonnet with a soldier-like air, and said to 
 
 A , in a most deferential manner, " Would you 
 
 be offended, sir, if I were speaking to you ?" 
 
 We both looked extremely encouraging, so he 
 added in a still more earnest voice, " I have served 
 in the four quarters of the globe, sir ! at St. Helena, 
 St. Jago, South America, Corunna, and the West 
 Indies !" 
 
 My purse now began to quiver in my reticule, 
 thinking of course this was a case of begging, and 
 I even settled that it would be impossible to get off 
 respectably under a shilling, when he added, " I 
 was wishing to ask a small favour of you, sir ! my 
 cottage is only a step off. If you and the lady will 
 come in to take a taste of whiskey and a biscuit, 
 that would be a great honour to the like of me. No 
 offence, sir, but it is our way in the Highlands !" 
 
 We thanked him cordially, though I could not 
 resist a gentle hint against what the Highlanders 
 call " a spark of whiskey," adding a short panegy- 
 
180 CASTLE GRANT. 
 
 lie OH teetotalism, but he said in reply, " It would 
 be a disgrace to any Macintosh, ma'am, who could 
 not take a glass or two without being the worse." 
 I suppose he was like the witness in court, who 
 said he had never seen his friend the worse of drink, 
 but often the better of it. You have heard of the 
 M. P. who, some years ago, inadvertently astonished 
 the House of Conmions, by beginning his speech 
 against the flogging of soldiers for intoxication, by 
 
 saying, " Mr. Speaker ! you get drunk, I 
 
 get drunk, we all get drunk !" 
 
 The cottage pointed out by our old soldier was 
 very neat, but by no means so near as he hospitably 
 wished us to think, therefore, with a civil apology, 
 on account of being limited in our allowance of time, 
 we politely suggested that he might accompany us 
 along the approach to show the way, which he 
 very obligingly did, and moreover pointed out some 
 of the battle-fields and hills, which otherwise we 
 should not have discovered. That of Cromdale in- 
 terested us especially, where the cause of James II. 
 received its final blow in Scotland, and the old sol- 
 dier informed us, that there the bones had lately 
 been dug up of " a person of respectability." How 
 the deceased's respectability had been ascertained 
 we did not hear. 
 
 A was so much pleased by the communi- 
 cativeness and simplicity of our military volunteer, 
 
CASTLE GRANT. 181 
 
 that when taking leave he offered him a handsome 
 donation, but the old soldier drew back, and actually 
 swore a solemn oath on the spot, that nothing could 
 induce him to accept it, not being apparently of so 
 persuadable a nature on this score as the pew-opener 
 at your church, who is forbid to accept any douceur 
 from strangers, but always whispers when declining 
 it, that they may place what they please under the 
 seat, where she will find it next morning. 
 
 What prodigious entertainment travellers lose, 
 who do not converse frankly and kindly with the 
 country people ! Our old cicerone seemed as fond 
 of Castle Grant as if it had been his own, and said 
 with a look of delighted anticipation, " You'll see 
 some things to-day, ma'am, that you little expect ! 
 The armory is a grand place ! you'll be surprised ! !" 
 
 In the approach, we were stopped by a poor 
 maniac, who fancies herself owner of this property, 
 and walked with great dignity, holding up her drag- 
 gled petticoats, and calling herself" Lady Watson !" 
 After a short parley, she condescended to let us 
 proceed ; and I could not but think how fortunate 
 it is, when madness is not of a melancholy kind, for 
 this pitiable being enjoyed a sort of happiness nearly 
 allied to that of persons who habitually build castles 
 in the air, but while we are deeply responsible for 
 any such voluntary waste of intellect, Lady Watson 
 may continue blamelessly to enjoy her imaginary 
 16 
 
182 CASTLE GRANT. 
 
 consequence, and to confer her imaginary favours, 
 unless it be true, as a French author once main- 
 tained, that men are answerable even for any sin 
 they may fancy themselves committing in a dream. 
 
 An American would say, that we could not 
 easily " ditto" Castle Grant ! I have seldom seen a 
 more striking coup d'oeil than this very stern-looking 
 old place, though the ancient towers have been 
 cruelly injured by a modern addition, like a cotton 
 manufactory, the blame of which hes upon Adams. 
 The venerable antique tower, rising 118 steps from 
 the ground, looks down with solemn contempt on 
 this vulgar excrescence, and seems heartily ashamed 
 of the connection. 
 
 We laboriously ascended, to enjoy from our 
 usual station on the roof, a grand wild view of the 
 Grant country, Cairngorum studded with snow, the 
 frowning heights of Ben Nevis, challenging the very 
 clouds, and endless plantations of sombre fir-trees, 
 so close and thick, they seemed as if we might walk 
 on their tops. I have a hearty respect for those 
 primitive old forests which planted and raised them- 
 selves from nothing ! 
 
 The furniture here, which I expected to find 
 almost coeval with the forests, is, on the contrary, 
 quite gay and modern ; chairs which run so lightly 
 along the floor, they might be entered for the St. 
 Leger, and sofas in the very newest extreme of 
 
CASTLE GRANT. 183 
 
 luxury and taste. The ancestors here are worth 
 travelling any distance to visit. In this very long 
 line, it is amusing to trace a family likeness among 
 so many successive generations, all remarkably 
 handsome, vsrhile we perceived a gradual moderni- 
 zing of dress and attitude. None were so beautiful, 
 however, as the young heiress of Rossdhu, Miss 
 Colquhoun, painted by Ramsay, in a rich white 
 satin dress, and carrying a wreath of flowers. She 
 was forcibly carried off by a second son of this fa- 
 mily, who proved, when on trial for the offence, that 
 the lady sat in front on the horse, and must there- 
 fore have run off with him ! This plea being con- 
 sidered satisfactory, the gentleman was acquitted, 
 and became afterwards laird of Grant, on which his 
 second son succeeded to the beautiful and extensive 
 domain of Rossdhu on Loch Lomond. We saw 
 here a miniature portrait including the three indi- 
 ^^duals who descended from that marriage. Sir Lu- 
 dovic Grant, Sir James Colquhoun, and Colonel 
 Colquhoun, all dressed exceedingly fine, and looking 
 very much bored, as if they were listening to some 
 very prosing talker. 
 
 Here we beheld about the twentieth copy I have 
 observed in Morayshire of the same painting. At 
 Brodie, Gordon Castle, Dunphail, Altyre, Castle 
 Grant, and probably every other house I did not 
 visit, there is a picture of the Sybil, which, as you 
 
184 CASTLE GRANT. 
 
 were once in this county, you must of course recol- 
 lect, with a pen in her hand, a turban on her head, 
 and her eyes turned up to the ceiling, exactly as we 
 all do, when much at a loss for an idea. 
 
 The Seafield family attached themselves appa- 
 rently, in a most amiable degree, to every person in 
 the remotest manner connected with them, and here 
 we saw five or six portraits, in full clerical costume, 
 of the various clergymen they were accustomed to 
 hear, the family piper full-length, and even the old 
 hen-wife in a kit-kat ! Nothing, however, in the 
 way of painting, ever amused me so much, as the 
 good humoured whim of an old Laird of Grant, who 
 brought to the castle an artist named Waitt, and 
 caused about thirty portraits to be done, exhibiting 
 the formidable likeness of each gentleman belonging 
 to his clan. It was a fine, chieftain-like idea, and 
 has been most comically executed ! You never saw 
 so fierce looking a collection ! The Kings of Scot- 
 land at Holyrood are nothing to it ! ! 
 
 If any family of Grant wishes for an ancestor, 
 he has only to come here and make a choice ! 
 A took down a memorandum of all their ex- 
 traordinary designations, but I only remember Grant 
 of Ballindalloch, and Grant of Tullochjjorum, well 
 known for the reel which goes by his name, and 
 even now he looks quite ready to start from his 
 frame, and set off to the piper opposite. In the 
 
GRANTOWN. 185 
 
 centre of all, hangs the patriarch of the clan, exhi- 
 biting a most venerable aspect, and wearing a pro- 
 fusion of gray hair, like white cotton. Unluckily 
 there are no Mrs. Grants ! I should have liked 
 beyond measure to see the ladies who matched 
 such gentlemen ! the power of painting could no 
 farther go ! 
 
 An old Laird of Grant formerly despatched one 
 of his clan to the Earl of Findlater with a present 
 of chickens and venison, but the Highlander not 
 being a good linguist, delivered his message in a 
 most deferential manner as follows : — " The Laird 
 o' Grant's compliments to the Laird o' Fin-laater, 
 and sends him sickness and vengeance. If he 
 wants more he can have them !" The two 
 neighbouring families of Findlater, or Fin-de-la- 
 terre, and Grant, are now merged into one, under 
 the more modern title of the Earl of Seafield. 
 
 Grantown is the most perfectly Highland village 
 I have seen. Here the men all sport their clan tar- 
 tans and kilts, while the young women wear a 
 graceful plaid, and the snood in their hair, looking 
 all neat, clean, and cheerful, " contented wi' little, 
 and cantie wi' mair." Our old soldier spoke in 
 raptures of the chief's family, saying, " they never 
 wish to change tenants, and we never wish to change 
 landlords." Undoubtedly it might surprise a stran- 
 ger, seeing no great manufactories in the village, 
 16* 
 
186 BALVENY CASTLE. 
 
 to observe, nevertheless, an appearance of almost 
 unaccountable prosperity. The granite houses, so 
 nearly similar in age and size, they seem all to have 
 been built at once, the streets spacious, and every 
 thing denoting comfort and competence ; but when 
 "we heard how liberally and judiciously the veiy 
 poorest tenants on this estate are attended to and 
 watched over, my perplexity on this subject was 
 ended, and I could wonder no longer, that the good 
 old times are still extant here, of boundless attach- 
 ment to the " reigning family." 
 
 We ought certainly now to have danced down 
 the glen of Strathspey, for we proceeded through 
 that charming valley, passing many fine seats in the 
 Grant country, among which Ballindalloch, belong- 
 ing to Sir George Macpherson Grant, is one of the 
 most ancient and beautiful, finely situated, richly 
 wooded, and exhibiting that air of indesci'ibable 
 cheerfulness and good order, which testifies the care 
 of a resident proprietor. 
 
 Balveny Castle is a considerable ruin which be- 
 longed to a celebrated heiress, " The fair maid of 
 Galloway," who succeeded the Earls of Douglas, 
 and Dukes of Touraine, by the cruel slaughter of 
 her two young brothers, whom the Chancellor 
 Crichton, without pity for their youth, the eldest 
 being only eighteen, or any scruple on account of 
 having promised them protection, treacherously in- 
 
GLENLIVET. 187 
 
 veigled into Edinburgh Castle, and beheaded. The 
 young lady first bestowed herself and castle on the 
 Earl of Douglas, her cousin, whom King James the 
 Second stabbed in Stirling Castle, when he arrived 
 there by invitation, bringing with him a safe con- 
 duct under the great seal. The disconsolate widow 
 next married, by special dispensation, the brother 
 and successor of her husband, who was forfeited 
 soon after, and fled to England ; but not wishing 
 to share his fortunes — or misfortunes — ^she got her 
 second marriage annulled, and his Majesty gave her 
 in marriage to his own half-brother, the Earl of 
 Atholl, who probably rebuilt the Castle of Belveny, 
 as the motto which he adopted is carved in immense 
 letters over the massy iron gate. When King James 
 the Second sent Lord Atholl against Macdonald, 
 Earl of Ross, his parting benediction was given in 
 these few words, which have ever since continued 
 to be the family motto, " Forth fortune, and fill the 
 fetters !" 
 
 The estate of Balveny escaped after all, however, 
 from the descendants of this frequently married 
 heiress, and went, by some odd mischance, to her 
 husband's son by a subsequent marriage, and after 
 remaining with the Earls of Atholl during five gene- 
 rations, and meeting with various other vicissitudes, 
 now belongs to the Earl of Fife. 
 
 A few miles above Ballindalloch is the vale of 
 
188 GLENLIVET. 
 
 Glenlivet, famous in modern times for its whiskey, 
 and in ancient times for its battle, generally known 
 as the battle of Balrinnes, where the young Earl of 
 Argyll, though only in his eighteenth year, acted as 
 generalissimo for the king, commanding an army of 
 12,000 men, which was defeated by Lord Huntly at 
 the head of 300 horse. In those days, every com- 
 mander carried a witch, or a professor of second- 
 sight with him, as regularly as his ADC, and Argyll 
 had been promised that, on the day after this battle, 
 his harp should be played in Buchan, and the bag- 
 pipe at Huntly's chief seat in Strathbogie, which 
 prediction was certainly fulfilled to the ear, though 
 not exactly as Argyll expected, for the notes were 
 not those of triumph, and he was not there to enjoy 
 the sound, having retreated to a distant refuge. 
 
 A little farther up is the late Duke of Gordon's 
 delightful shooting lodge of Glenfiddich, the well 
 known head-quarters for deer-stalking. The late 
 floods have rendered it almost unapproachable for 
 the last three miles, as the road has been washed 
 away, and the river must be forded eleven or twelve 
 times to reach the spot, but it is thought that the 
 present noble proprietor prefers encountering these 
 difficulties himself, rather than throw this preserve 
 more open to idle tourists, like ourselves, who 
 " frighten the deer," as it was objected to steam- 
 boats on the Thames that they " frightened the fish." 
 
ELCHIES. 189 
 
 Between Elgin and its flourishing port Burgh- 
 head, stands the large baronial house of Gordonston, 
 well wooded, but otherwise in a featureless flat. It 
 is a plain, square, town-like pile, now beginning to 
 show symptoms of disconsolate neglect, since the 
 Gordon baronets failed, and it fell to the Gumming 
 family, who possess the far more captivating resi- 
 dence of Altyre, in the same county. Within this 
 house is a subterranean cell, in which a peeress was 
 formerly imprisoned by Sir Robert Gordon, that she 
 might be induced to surrender her patrimonial rights, 
 but the lady held out with great spirit, and was at 
 last liberated triumphantly. This family of Gordon 
 were all so clever, that they gained the reputation 
 of being, in several instances, wizards, and the prac- 
 tice of witchcraft was kept up in Morayshire longer 
 than in any other part of Scotland. Sir Robert 
 Gordon, being the premier Baronet of Scotland, was 
 very jealous on the score of precedency, and having 
 met once at dinner a neighbour recently promoted to 
 an Irish peerage, who was smilingly taking his 
 place first in the procession down stairs, the tall, 
 gaunt Sir Robert stalked hastily after his Lordship, 
 grasped his shoulder, and twirling him round, an- 
 grily exclaimed, " Na ! na ! my Lord ! ye mami 
 gang to Ireland for that !" 
 
 Near Elgin we passed the estate of Elchies, 
 from which one of our Scotch judges formerly took 
 
190 ELGIN. 
 
 his title. Nothing perplexes English strangers more 
 in Scotland, than our bishops without mitres, and 
 lords without coronets. I remember seeing a great 
 genealogist, who met one of our fifteen judges at 
 dinner, suffering agonies of perplexity on hearing a 
 frequently repeated title, the date and patent of 
 which he could not call to mind, till at last he turned 
 anxiously to Lord , who had observed his em- 
 barrassment, and said, in allusion to the number of 
 peers elected to Parliament, " Might I ask, my Lord, 
 if you are one of the sixteen ?" " No," replied his 
 Lordship with grave dignity, " I am one of the fif- 
 teen !" The strangest choice of a designation I 
 ever knew, was made by one of our judges, who 
 called himself " Lord Unthank !" 
 
 Elgin is a beautifully varied little city of eccen- 
 tric old houses, and charming new streets, built of a 
 stone which surpasses all praise, being exactly of 
 the hue that Cheltenham wishes to appear, a pale, 
 delicate, nankeen colour, and the longer it is exposed 
 the harder it becomes. This is more particularly to 
 be admired in the grand old ruinous cathedral, com- 
 monly known as " the Lantern of the North," which 
 looks so perfectly untarnished by time, that it seems 
 more like a building about to be finished, than an 
 aged veteran, whose work is done. The Bishop's 
 house, too, a few yards off, has considerable remains 
 of grandeur. I was recently amused to hear, that 
 
ELGIN. 191 
 
 the late Lord Dalhousie, not being able at once to 
 understand the difference between St. Peter's and 
 the Vatican, a friend made it plain by saying, " Why, 
 ray Lord, only recollect that St. Peter's is the kirk, 
 and the Vatican the manse." 
 
 At Elgin cathedral, the celebrated carvings have 
 edges as sharp and distinct as the day they were 
 chiselled, and nothing in sculpture can be more 
 beautiful than the arched door of entrance, with eight 
 fine pillars, surmounted by wreaths of roses in full 
 relief. The octagon chapter-house is also orna- 
 mented on the roof with a perfect garden of flowers 
 turned into stone. 
 
 The old guide here, a well known character, is 
 commonly called "The Bishop of Moray." His 
 enthusiasm respecting this noble specimen of sacred 
 architecture renders him a desirable cicerone through 
 the old walls, which are in fully better repair than 
 himself, as he can scarcely totter along. The old 
 man leaning on his oaken staff, feels an honest pride 
 in boasting of the diligence with which he has 
 cleaned and arranged the ruins, since he was ap- 
 pointed guardian, and he signalized his reign by 
 moving away 2866 carts of rubbish, which had ac- 
 cumulated in the lapse of ages, conceahng some of 
 the steps, and several prostrate fragments of beauti- 
 ful workmanship. Here " men of marble piecemeal 
 melt away," and our guide has composed a laugh- 
 
192 ELGIN CATHEDRAL. 
 
 able medley of the broken and mutilated statues, 
 which he arranged in groups according to his own 
 fancy, putting noses on wherever they were want- 
 ing, and placing heads upon bodies for which they 
 were never intended. The party which he particularly 
 piqued himself upon, consisted of a face with an ex- 
 pression of suffering, which he called Dives, a good- 
 humoured complacent-looking head near, represent- 
 ed Lazarus, and he had found a colossal dog's head, 
 which was supposed to be licking the sores. A 
 scolding physiognomy, which he discovered beneath 
 a mountain of rubbish, he has stuck up on a tower 
 opposite to another representing the celebrated Wolf 
 of Badenoch, who once did penance here, standing 
 barefoot at the great gate, and who not only robbed 
 and massacred this noble edifice, but finally set it on 
 fire. John Knox generally gets the blame wherever 
 we see a roofless church, but you must acquit him 
 on this occasion, as he can prove an alihi, not having 
 yet been born. The old guide informed me that 
 there were on this establishment formerly, two-and- 
 twenty canons, which he thought it necessary to 
 explain were not military but ecclesiastical. 
 
 Besides many fine old tombs of bishops and war- 
 riors now crumbling to dust, like those they were 
 intended to commemorate, we were shown the coffin 
 of King Duncan, but could hear no account of where 
 his bones had been placed. I am told that, when 
 
ELGIN CATHEDRAL. 193 
 
 the burying vault at Lord K 's was opened 
 
 some years ago, one of the coffins, which had been 
 evidently burst open, was empty, and a skeleton lay 
 at some distance, leading to the fearful conjecture, 
 that the unfortunate person had been interred alive. 
 At the English burial vaults in Munich, each de- 
 ceased person has a bell placed beside his body, in 
 case he should come alive again ! a most desirable 
 precaution in a sultry climate, where the funeral 
 follows so immediately after death. Our cicerone 
 showed us where the last two very popular and 
 talented Dukes of Gordon are interred, and his voice 
 faultered with emotion when he spoke, yet in any 
 less solemnizing situation, you could scarcely have 
 resisted a smile, at the free and easy tone with which 
 he mentioned them as " my people," generally com- 
 mencing his stories, of which he related many, by 
 saying, " The Duke and I were talking here one 
 
 day" ^but he did not get so far as to say, like 
 
 your friend, " I and the Duke !" How astonished 
 noblemen would sometimes feel, if they could sud- 
 denly behold a collection of all the intimate friends 
 who speak of them, in remote districts, with a de- 
 gree of familiarity highly impressive, to country 
 cousins and provincial neighbours ; for many aspi- 
 ring youths, who have dined once in company with 
 a man of rank, or even passed him on the street, 
 think it incumbent on them, ever afterwards, to 
 17 
 
194 ELGIN. 
 
 forget his title ; and if it makes them happy, why 
 not ? One remarkable phenomenon in the natural 
 history of fashionable life, which I really do pique 
 myself upon having discovered, is, that any gentle- 
 man who invariably gives an absent peer his title in 
 mixed society, may, in all probability, have the pri- 
 vilege of dispensing with it if they actually meet ; 
 but those who un-Lord a nobleman supposed to be 
 at a safe distance, are obliged, when by ill-luck he 
 unexpectedly appears — ^if on speaking terms at all, 
 which is improbable — to make such an expenditure 
 of Lordships in his presence, as might pay off, with 
 interest, all previous deficiencies. A young lady 
 from the country, some time ago, when taking a 
 romantic leave of a school companion, the daughter 
 of an Earl, exclairned in a paroxysm of affection, 
 " Do let us correspond, and may I call you Fanny ?" 
 To which the particular friend replied, " Call me 
 what you please, but spare me the letter-writing !" 
 
 I must conclude my long epistle with an amu- 
 sing story in the Scotch dialect, which, though 
 known in this neighbourhood, being related of a 
 celebrated character who resided not far off, may 
 probably be new to you ; and even at the worst, it 
 is one of the very few I could venture to tell twice, 
 therefore, try if you can understand it without a 
 glossary. 
 
 The Laird of Bonymoon was extremely hospi- 
 
ELGIN. 195 
 
 table, but so exceedingly lazy and indolent, that his 
 sisters could scarcely ever entice him from the fire- 
 side; but one morning they entreated him with 
 great anxiety to take a ride for the good of his health. 
 
 " Hoot !" said he angrily, " what should gar me 
 gang bumping on a horse, when I can sit quietly 
 here wi' my glass o' toddy !" 
 
 " But, brother," answered they, " if anything 
 should ail you, what would become of us ? Pray go 
 for our sakes." 
 
 " Weel ! ony thing for a quiet life ! I'll e'en 
 tak' this weary ride. I'm sure, I wish it was o'er ; 
 but mind ! 'gin I meet ony body coming this way, 
 I'll bring him back to his dinner ; if no', may be I'll 
 dine with some neighbour. John, saddle the horses." 
 
 Accordingly off went the laird on a jog-trot 
 awkward-looking horse, boxing the compass with 
 his head to see if any human being were coming his 
 way, as a pretext for turning ; but meeting nobody, 
 he arrived at last near the house of an intimate friend. 
 
 " Ah, Bonymoon, is this you 1 I'm very glad 
 to see you ! . What wind brought you here ?" 
 
 " Never mind that ! I'm come to dine wi' you ! 
 What ha' ye got ?" 
 
 "A bubbly jock and a grilse."* 
 
 "John, tak' the horses! Aye, neighbour, ye 
 live weel ! Is there ony body wi' ye ?" 
 
 ♦ Turkey and salmon. 
 
196 ELGIN. 
 
 " Only an English gentleman." 
 
 In they went, and the host taking his stranger 
 guest aside, whispered, " I think it necessary to in- 
 form you, that I mean to play the laird a trick. 
 He is said to have neither taste nor smell, and I 
 wish to try him with cherry brandy instead of port." 
 
 After dinner, wine being put on table, the laird 
 exclaimed, " But what's a' this ! you've sent me a 
 different bottle from your own !" 
 
 " This is claret, and you like port." 
 
 " Aye ! aye ! give me nane o' ye' re washes. Gie 
 me something that'll take a grip o' the stamach." 
 
 He then filled a bumper to the King. " Honest 
 man ! I like him weel aneuch ! Oh ! neighboui-, hae 
 ye muckle o' this wine! it's the best port I ever 
 tasted ! oh! man, it's fine !" 
 
 Bumper after bumper was tossed down with in- 
 creasing relish, till at last the bottle was emptied. 
 
 " My guid friend," said the laird, " though you hae 
 few o' thae bottles, will ye treat me to anither 1" 
 
 " Certainly, Bonymoon ! Sandy ! another bottle ! 
 be sure it is the same." 
 
 The laird became more and more captivated 
 with this new vintage of port, but after finishing 
 the second supply, he made an attempt to rise, say- 
 ing, " Weel, neighbour ! we've spent a very pleasant 
 evening thegether, and had a great deal o' sensible 
 conversation." 
 
ELGIN. 197 
 
 "You're not going already?" 
 
 " Aye ! aye ! the lasses at hame'll be wearying." 
 Saying this he made a second effort to get up, but 
 stumbled and fell back, angrily exclaiming, " Hoot ! 
 canna' ye mak' the carpet straight ! thae runkles 
 might throw down ony body." 
 
 With the help of his obliging neighbour, the 
 laird was mounted on horseback, when the English- 
 man anxiously remonstrated, saying, " Surely you 
 will not send the gentleman home in such a state ! 
 he will meet with some accident !" 
 
 " No ! no ! he is accustomed to it ! only let us 
 run up the approach, and hear him pledge the gude- 
 w^ife at my lodge in a dram." 
 
 The two listeners arrived in time to hear the 
 laird making many kind inquiries for a' the bairns, 
 and the dialogue concluded by the gate-keeper 
 saying, " It's an unco' raw night ! your honour wad 
 na' be the w^ar o' a drap whiskey !" 
 
 " Deed no, gudewife ! The laird's port sits 
 unco' cauld on my stamach. Fill it up !" 
 
 Bonymoon having thus primed himself, rode on 
 with some spirit, but soon after' in crossing a small 
 stream, the laird vainly tried to balance himself, 
 but his head proved heaviest, and he slid down into 
 the cuirent. 
 
 " John !" said he, " What's that I hear splashing 
 in the water 7" 
 
 17* 
 
198 ELGIN. 
 
 " I'm thinking it's your honour," answered John, 
 getting off his horse to assist his master, who was 
 with great ditficulty remounted, but soon after, in 
 passing over a wide moor, a sudden gust of wind 
 carried away the laird's hat and wig, which he or- 
 dered John to find immediately. 
 
 " It's impossible, your honour ! I might as weel 
 look for a needle in a haystack !" 
 
 " Never mind that, John ! I winna stir without 
 my wig !'* 
 
 John got down, grumbling loudly, and groping 
 about, until, by good luck, he found them both, 
 when the laird attempted to put his wig on, but 
 having placed the part that should have been be- 
 hind, in front, the cue hung over his nose. 
 
 " Stop, John ! this is no' my wig." 
 
 " Your honour maun just be do'ng then, for 
 there's nae w^ail o' wigs here !" replied John, coolly 
 mounting his horse, and in this plight the laird ar- 
 rived at home, where he staggered straight into the 
 drawing-room, when his sisters, not at first recog- 
 nising him, screamed aloud with alarm. 
 
 " Hoot !" said he, " what are ye bawling at ?" 
 
 " Brother ! is that you !" cried they eagerly. 
 " What in the world has happened to you ! Make 
 haste in to the fire, and change yourself. Quick ! 
 I'm sure it will be long enough before we again 
 recommend a ride for your health," 
 
SPEY BRIDGE. 
 
 My dear Cousin, — To do you justice, I scarcely 
 know any one who stands the expense of postage 
 in a more magnanimous spirit than yourself, and ac- 
 cordingly I shall now put you to the test. I often 
 think no vice carries its own punishment along with 
 it so obviously as the love of money— it interferes 
 with every thing — especially on a journey, for there 
 can be few greater annoyances than to be surrounded 
 by grumbling post-boys and discontented landladies ; 
 besides which, it impedes all sociability with our 
 friends, all liberality to the poor, poisoning every 
 meal we sit down to, embittering sickness itself on 
 account of the expense, and even diminishing the 
 pleasures of a friendly correspondence like ours ; in 
 short, it meets you at every corner. However, 
 where necessary, I admire and respect judicious 
 economy, but there can be no consolation for those 
 who practise it in excess without absolute occasion. 
 Those who have a liberal spirit and a limited income 
 know, that what they save in one thing, will be 
 added to their expenditure in something else of more 
 absolute importance, but I cannot sufficiently won- 
 der at those who make money the end of their 
 
200 SPEY BRIDGE. 
 
 being, merely for hoarding sake — merely that a 
 cipher may at last be added to their book in the 
 bank ! It seems to me the most unaccountable of 
 all infatuations ! I have come to the conclusion, 
 after long and careful observation, that the very 
 highest attainment of human good sense is, to 
 proportion your expenses, both charitable and do- 
 mestic, precisely to your income ; for when we see 
 that rich people become almost invariably avaricious, 
 and that when the poor have little, they think it 
 not worth hoarding, and become extravagant, I 
 really think a testimonial should be voted to any 
 man who can be proved to have kept the balance 
 exactly for a certain number of years, duly consid- 
 ering the claims of his children, his dependents, his 
 religion, and even his own comfort. It is a curious 
 phenomenon how many rich people wish to live as 
 if they were poor, and how many poor people con- 
 trive to live as if they were rich ! 
 
 We this day crossed Spey Bridge without acci- 
 dent or mishap, which is more than the late Duke 
 of Gordon did, who was standing on it during the 
 great flood, eleven years ago, when hearing a sudden 
 crack, he had barely time to flee, before, with the 
 rapidity of lightning and a noise like thunder, a 
 mass of water, piled "with full-grown trees and with 
 floating rubbish, swept forward in irresistible power, 
 and buried the noble bridge in a dark and boihng 
 
GORDON CASTLE. 201 
 
 torrent. His Grace, on that occasion, found his re- 
 treat cut off towards Gordon Castle, having hurriedly 
 escaped to the wrong side of the river, where he 
 was charitably fed and clothed during several days 
 at Orton, the hospitable residence of Mr. Wharton 
 Duff. A new arch of wood has been since built, a 
 single span, 200 feet wdde, which really makes a 
 tolerably long arm across the water. 
 
 We still continue at full speed, hopping from 
 castle to castle, and from mountain to mountain, at 
 a rate that would carry us very speedily round the 
 world. It certainly is a great privilege to take 
 possession of all these magnificent places for an 
 hour or two, enjoying the landscape, pictures, and 
 furniture as if they were our own, and to-day w^e 
 made a most agreeable and fatiguing house-tour in 
 Gordon Castle, till my eyes became perfectly glassy 
 with exhaustion. I w^onder that people ever survive 
 seeing the Louvre I A week at Florence would 
 kill me outright. 
 
 Though the grounds of Inverary, Blair Athol, 
 and Hopetoun House, are perhaps more exquisitely 
 lovely than those of Gordon Castle, yet, this seems 
 to be, on the whole, the finest ducal residence in 
 Scotland. I am told that the largest mansion in 
 England, Wentworth House, covers the eighth of 
 a mile, but this is also of vast extent, being five 
 hundred and sixty-eight feet long, and built of the 
 
202 GORDON CASTLE. 
 
 splendid Elgin free-stone : " A world of a house !" 
 It is cui'ious that every thing more magnificent or 
 more beautiful than common, is apt to make us 
 melancholy ! Music or poetry, or even an unusually 
 generous action, bring tears starting to the eyes, 
 and I have even known instances where the first 
 surprise of beholding a very majestic edifice has 
 produced this effect, and I could perfectly fancy it 
 arising in such a scene as this. Probably the tears 
 we shed for the moral sublimity of a fine action, 
 may partly be caused by a transient sense of what 
 our nature was originally before the fall. 
 
 The park at Gordon Castle is bounded only by 
 the horizon ; the trees are gigantic, every thing, in 
 short, appears on the grandest scale, and the great 
 antiquity of this ancient family adds interest and 
 dignity to all we admire. Every page in the history 
 of Scotland seems mingled with the names of Huntly 
 and Gordon, always brave, generous, and loyal, — 
 the first to take arms for their king and country, 
 remaining alw^ays true to the family motto, " By 
 courage not by craft." They flourished and reigned 
 here since Robert Bruce transplanted them from 
 Berwickshire, during two-and-twenty generations ; 
 but this noble estate has recently been divorced from 
 the title, and alienated from a name so long supreme 
 among those glens and hills of Strathspey. Can it 
 be possible that the long line of Huntly and Gordon 
 
GORDON CASTLE. 203 
 
 has actually vanished from the halls of their fathers ! 
 This was indeed a nice little succession for those 
 who have inherited it ! In ancient days the land 
 frequently cariied the title along with it, and, indeed, 
 the time was once when a Marquis of Huntly might 
 have unfurled his standard, rallied his clan around 
 him, and bid defiance to an English successor, but 
 perhaps in these days one could scarcely recommend 
 such an experiment. It was an old rule in Scottish 
 law, to claim all you can, and you may be certain 
 to get more than you have a right to. 
 
 One fine old tower of the ancient castle, far sur- 
 mounting the rest, has remained steadfast, like a 
 monument of past generations, through all the vicis- 
 situdes of time, and still continues, greatly excelling 
 the adjoining edifice of more recent date. "When 
 I merely say a building is old, let that be considered 
 equivalent to a panegyric, being, as you know, so 
 fond of antiquities that I would any day prefer a 
 Queen Anne's farthing to a good modern guinea. I 
 only wished this venerable tower had been roofless, 
 because we had so toilsome an ascent to the top, 
 
 where A should have sung the popular song, 
 
 " Sic a rinin' up stairs !" We were amply repaid, 
 however, at last by a view which it would take me 
 a folio volume to describe ; but never rest in peace 
 till you have stood in an ecstasy of delight where 
 
204 GORDON CASTLE. 
 
 we did to-day, and astonished the very stars with 
 your exclamations of rapture. 
 
 The entrance hall is decorated with every des- 
 cription of elegant lumber, among which we admired 
 several beautiful busts and statues copied from the 
 antique, particularly the Apollo Belvidere and the 
 Venus de Medici, the grace and expression of which 
 can scarcely be excelled, I should imagine, by their 
 great originals at Florence, which have so long con- 
 tinued to " enchant the world." 
 
 Cosmo, Duke of Gordon, received his not very 
 Highland name in compliment to Cosmo, Duke of 
 Tuscany, whose exceedingly ugly bust stands in the 
 entrance-hall, and from his foreign godfather the 
 Duke seems to have derived a truly Italian taste for 
 sculpture, as the entrance-hall would remind you of 
 a marble-cutter's show-room. The stair-carpet here 
 is of Gordon tartan, dark green and purple, which 
 looks rather sombre, but is considered one of our 
 handsomest Highland plaids. I always feel sorry 
 for the family pictures in an empty house, they .look 
 so lonely, cold, and forlorn, but here each individual 
 ancestor seems to have been handsome and distin- 
 guished-looking. In the dining-room hangs a com- 
 plete wreath round the wall, representing Earls, 
 Marquisses, and Marchionesses of Huntly, all look- 
 ing their very best, as they appeared in the olden 
 
GORDON CASTLE. 205 
 
 time ; and the worthy housekeeper seemed to think 
 every grim-looking personage on the walls must 
 have possessed the same title, as she created, with- 
 out scruple or hesitation, a long succession of Mar- 
 quisses on the spot. 
 
 The first Earl, who had three wives, looks as if 
 he had w^ept his eyes out for them all, and the first 
 Marquis is a grand aristocratic-looking personage. 
 On his first attending court, being censured for not 
 bowing when introduced, he proudly replied, " I am 
 accustomed to live in a country where every body 
 bows to me !" 
 
 George, second Marquis of Huntly, a melan- 
 choly-looking man, was beheaded for his attach- 
 ment to Charles the First. His two eldest sons 
 were considered the most amiable and distinguished 
 youths of their time, but the first was killed under 
 Montrose, and his brother died of grief for the ex- 
 ecution of Charles the First. How enthusiastic was 
 the attachment which that monarch created ! 
 
 Ladies were sometimes very strange beings long 
 ago ! only very long ago, not now, — and we looked 
 with some awe yet, at the ancient Countess of 
 Huntly, who was a most terrifying character in her 
 time. About the year 1590, during her husband's 
 absence, she received the chief of Mackintosh on an 
 embassy of peace, and angrily declared, that there 
 should be no reconciliation till his neck was on the 
 18 
 
206 GORDON CASTLES 
 
 block. The unwary visiter jocularly laid his head 
 on a table in pretended submission, seeing which 
 one of the attendants of the Countess instantly 
 grasped a carving-knife, and severed it from his 
 shoulders. This unhappy victim was nephew to the 
 Earl of Moray. His followers she afterwards im- 
 prisoned, and fed them like swine out of a trough ; 
 but for these cruelties, and many more, her title was 
 forfeilieil, tliough subsequently restored. 
 
 The son of this ferocious latly hieing condemned 
 to death, she begged his Hfe in vain, and found no 
 more mercy than she had shown. Being consid- 
 ered the handsomest man of the age, Queen Mary 
 became accused of partiality to hiin, and was forced 
 against her will to witness his execution. Nothing 
 in thie \vay of fortune-telling could be more curious 
 than that which occurred to this Countess's husband, 
 L6rd Huntly, who had been warned that he should 
 certainly die at Corraighie. The name sounded to 
 him like Creigh, a place near Aberdeen, which he 
 always afterwards carefully avoided, but when dan- 
 gerously wounded at the battle of Corraighie, he 
 anxiously inquired the name of the place, on hear- 
 ing which, he repeated it thrice before he died, 
 " Corraighie ! Corraighie ! Corraighie ! then God 
 be merciful to me !" 
 
 Two beautiful representations are extant here of 
 the celebrated Duchess of Gordon, whose witty and 
 
GORDON CASTLE. 207 
 
 eccentric sayings are the favourite theme of every 
 jest-book. Sir Joshua Reynolds had the honour of 
 having executed the very lovely one we first ob- 
 served, with the finest eyes that ever lighted up a 
 face, but the portrait was not at all characteristic, 
 being drawn with that pensive, languid, not-partic- 
 ularly-clever expression observable in most of the 
 feijial§ portraits by that artist. The other, by An- 
 gf li^a K^ufFinan, had so noble an aspect, that I 
 should feel proud only to be the nail that it was 
 hung upon. Her Grace's countenance appeared 
 radiant with all that spirit and vivacity for which 
 she was long distinguished, while you could per- 
 fectly imagine her uttering some startling and pi- 
 quant bon mot, such as those with which she fre- 
 quently enlivened the dullest society. There are 
 persons who seem formed for the situations they 
 occupy, and when I remember Jane Duchess of 
 Gordon's queen-rlike majesty of appearance and 
 commanding manner, it seems as if by nature she 
 could never have been otherwise than the leading 
 person in every circle, even without the adventitious 
 aid of her exalted rank. 
 
 Her Grace, when dying, desired to be buried at 
 her own favourite and romantic residence, Kinrara, 
 on the Spey. She ordered that for her epitaph the 
 names and titles of all her daughters should be en- 
 graved on the tombstone, where I am told they may 
 
208 GORDON CASTLE. 
 
 now be read at full length. Among the number 
 are included three Duchesses and a Marchioness. 
 Certainly no one ever played more successfully at 
 the game of" catch honours." 
 
 The Duke, her husband, lived to the age of 
 eighty-four, and is represented in every stage of ex- 
 istence, from childhood to the most advanced period 
 of life. It would have been amusing to arrange 
 the whole series close together ! He is exhibited 
 first on the staircase, when two years old, as Cupid, 
 equipped with wings and a quiver; but to these 
 customary decorations a light tartan scarf is super- 
 added, while the mischievous little sprite looks 
 highly entertained at his extraordinary transforma- 
 tion into a Highlander. 
 
 Five other portraits of his Grace hang else- 
 where ; the first painted at Rome, where he has 
 evidently returned from a capital day's sport, being 
 surrounded by tired looking dogs and dead game. 
 In another frame, he sports a fancy dress ; and this 
 likeness was said to have been painted by Raeburn 
 at the time of his marriage. His Grace next looks 
 down from the wall in his Lord Lieutenant's uniform, 
 and last, in extreme old age, with his star and rib- 
 bon, which I remember his invariably wearing in 
 the evenings, being of the now exploded opinion, 
 that such honourable decorations should occasionally 
 be seen, and need not be reserved only for a corona- 
 
GORDON CASTLE. 209 
 
 tlon. The Duke w^as an excellent performer on 
 the violin, and delighted so peculiarly in Scotch 
 music, that if every one felt as keen a national par- 
 tiality, the Italian Opera-House would soon be 
 deserted. 
 
 There are three pictures at Gordon Castle of 
 the celebrated Lord Peterborough, looking very 
 spirited and consequential, as if " a thousand hearts 
 were great within his breast ;" and certainly few 
 heroes have merited a larger leaf of laurel. As a 
 lady once impatiently remarked of her husbatid, 
 "cats have nine lives, but he seemed to have ten." 
 In one of Lord Peterborough's portraits, he wears 
 a wig waving in billows over his shoulders, which 
 five ordinary heads of hair could scarcely iaave sup- 
 plied. He would have made an excellent frontis- 
 piece for Rowland's macassar oil ; but in these days 
 a wig must have been almost as expensive as an 
 estate, when a country girl received £60 for her 
 ringlets, and an old woman's gray hair was sold 
 for .£50 ! 
 
 Lord Peterborough said, after visiting Fenelon, 
 " If I had stayed with him any longer, I should have 
 become a Christian in spite of myself!" How un- 
 fortunate for him now, that he did not ! His cour- 
 age in the field was only excelled by the firmness 
 with which he sustained the long agonies of a pain- 
 ful death, but his was the stern endurance of a 
 18* 
 
210 GORDON CASTLE. 
 
 Stoic, not the enlightened resignation of a Christian. 
 Even when folding his mantle around him to fall 
 with dignity, he was coldly sarcastic in talking of 
 Christianity, and merely said, that " he made a 
 point of being civil to all religions," a species of 
 compromise only too common now ! It is curious 
 that Lord Peterborough's daughter, the Duchess of 
 Gordon, introduced the Protestant faith into this 
 family, previously bigoted Roman Catholics, but 
 being left guardian of her son, while a minor, she 
 brought him up in her own creed, which was, for- 
 tunately, less accommodating than that of her father. 
 When we see a cold, hard, stern, disposition like 
 his, united to such great natural endowments, it re- 
 minds me of a frost-bound garden, where no flowers 
 nor fruit can flourish ; and till the good seed be 
 sown, till the dew fall, and the sun shine from 
 heaven upon the barren waste, how cheerless and 
 desolate a sight it must ever remain ! 
 
 We admired much, a very handsome portrait, in 
 full Highland garb, of the late very popular Duke, — 
 the last heir of his long hne ! The world has been 
 so accustomed for centuries to have Dukes of Gor- 
 don successively appearing, that it seems quite 
 strange now without one ! In the same room hangs 
 a picture, such as you seldom see, representing the 
 Duke of Perth, so dignified, so animated, and so very 
 intellectual looking, that the whole expression was 
 
GOREON CASTLE. 211 
 
 in character with the history of one, who was " as 
 brave as he was bonny." The dress consists of a 
 graceful plaid thrown over his Highland uniform. 
 What a misfortune to gentlemen of taste, being- 
 born in the present century, when their whole 
 genius must limit itself to a blue coat and black 
 neckcloth ! The worst portrait in this collection is 
 one of George IV., presented by his Majesty to the 
 late Duke, but it is a most unworthy representation 
 of " the fii'st gentleman in Europe," looking more 
 like some country actor performing a burlesque, and 
 exactly in the attitude of Lord Bateman's " proud 
 porter." 
 
 We were considerably entertained by a full length 
 portrait of James the Second's Queen, when in exile. 
 She is consoling herself by feeding a pet lamb, 
 while her crown is laid on the ground in a garden, 
 her dog lies a her feet, her flowers are scattered 
 about, and a book is in her hand, so she is apparently 
 resolved to find comfort in something, and her Ma- 
 jesty looks so fat and good-humoured, that the cares 
 of abdication have evidently sat very lightly on her 
 brow. She seemed by no means in the vein of ex- 
 claiming, like the celebrated John Home, when 
 vexed by some trifling disappointment, 
 
 " Let petrifaction stop this falling tear, 
 And fix my form for ever marble here !" 
 
 A very antique portrait of Queen Mary is at 
 
212 GORDON CASTLE. 
 
 Gordon Castle, said, of course, to be original, and I 
 almost believe it. The date is 1568, the last year 
 of her liberty, and it has the brilliant look of health 
 and animation, which vanished, after every gay 
 vision of power and glory had been blotted out by 
 her tears. 
 
 I have no song of youlb and hope. 
 
 That does not close in care^ 
 
 [ have no lale of woman's love 
 
 That ends not in despair ; 
 
 I only breathe the 7iame of joy 
 
 To tell how soon it dies ; 
 
 I only sing the songs that suit 
 
 Thy notes, my harp of sighs. 
 
 In the same collection is shown the portrait of 
 a young beauty, who might certainly have rivalled 
 Queen Mary herself She was the favourite friend 
 of a former Duchess, who must have been superior 
 to envy or jealousy, but the name of this lovely 
 vision is forgotten by our cicerone, so she must re- 
 main anonymous. Any young lady, with one fea- 
 ture of her face, might set up for a beauty, for they 
 are all equally perfect. The Magazine des Modes 
 would describe her dress as " a robe of rich white 
 satin, a scarf of torquoise blue, and her chesnut hair 
 simply combed back off her forehead." The lovely 
 countenance was painted so much to the life, that 
 she seemed to blush when we looked at her. 
 
 One of the ancient pictures in this collection 
 
GORDON CASTLE. 213 
 
 represents Herodias carrying the head of John the 
 Baptist in a charger; but the artist has given 
 her much too gentle and feminine an expression, 
 though, certainly, the sweetest coxmtenances do 
 sometimes conceal the sternest minds; and when 
 you see a fixed unalterable smile in any face, Avith 
 a particularly subdued manner, the probabilities are 
 ten to one that this habitual aspect has been assumed 
 as a necessary veil to hide the real temper. 
 
 The only cheerful portrait of Charles the First, 
 that I ever beheld, is here! He has undeniably 
 relaxed into a smile, and looks as if he might, occa- 
 sionally in his life, have enjoyed a happy moment. 
 
 Connoiseurs all agree in saying, that the finest 
 painting in this collection is that of St. Paul rebuking 
 St. Peter. The colouring and expression are so 
 exceedingly forcible, that I could not get far enough 
 off to catch the general effect advantageously, but 
 it looked too hard and distinct, having very much the 
 effect of a tableau vivant, without the gauze curtain. 
 
 I could not but reflect, in looking around on 
 those ancient walls and pictures, what a busy 
 interesting world this has been before we entered 
 it ! So many distinguished men ! so many beau- 
 tiful women ! so many fine painters ! so many ven- 
 erable books, in black letter, and in white letter ! 
 so many banners now idly waving over our heads, 
 and so many broad-swords rusting in their scab- 
 
^14 GORDON CASTLE. 
 
 Imds, which wginte(J only tlie heroes who wiekleti 
 ihem, to b^oiTifi as bright and as powerful as 
 pver ! Ours is a busy world still, but how different ! 
 What a sordid money^-making activity bestirs us 
 j]Ow ! Men were fornierly estiffiated according tq 
 Jheir heroism, their bodily strength, or their talents, 
 jjut i?.ow tlifi standard of every thing is wealth — not 
 dfy-en the use that is made of it, but the mere pos- 
 session ! We examined in the armory Charles Ed- 
 ward's leathern purse, with a silver clasp, which he 
 presented to the then Duke of Gordon. It is 
 scarcely n)ore empty now, than it was when he 
 owned it; but where would any one find in the 
 present day, partisans as ready on a chivalrous im- 
 pulse to forfeit their wealth and estates ! The first 
 question now, preparatory to engaging in any new 
 undertaking is, " What per cent, will it bring ?" 
 jVIen are flocking to Australia for twenty per cent, 
 or to be devoured by the cannibals of New Zea- 
 land for thirty, while even sportsmen no longer carry 
 their guns on the moors, without m eye to profit, 
 but make rrjoney by their very amusements. Many 
 become poulterers now, and sell the birds they kill, 
 or have them potted for the East Indian market ! or 
 exchange them for shot I What old lady can ever 
 hope now, to receive her annual box of grouse with 
 any body's compliments, when, as Dr. Johnson 
 wisely observes, " Few men give what they can sell?" 
 
GORDON cASTtfes 219 
 
 It has been often remarked, that the richest and 
 most extravagant Enghshmen generally turn ex- 
 tremely saving when they enter Scotland, probably 
 imagining that we are not accustomed to see much 
 expense ; but among those who contract to supply 
 dealers with game at so much per head, from our 
 Highland moors, are found the youhg heirs to some 
 of the highest honours and most extensive proper- 
 ties in the south. GroUsfe arC) hoVfever, the uncon- 
 scious benefactors of Scotland, by gathering the 
 best company round them, as, without their attrac- 
 tions, we should be almost entirely deserted. 
 
 A charmirig sheltered garden lies close behind 
 Gordon Castle, v^ry tastefully laid out, the gravel 
 walks meandering like a chain round a brilliant 
 patch-work of flow^er-beds, which are thus cut into 
 diagonal squares, with here and there a morsel of 
 smooth turf to vary the colouring. At some distance 
 may be seen a still more beautiful parterre, which 
 has been laid out in a stone quarry. The soil is, of 
 couree, all artificial, but you can imagine nothing 
 more picturesque than the strange irregularities of 
 ground. It would almost weary you to look at the 
 steep walks leading towards precipices, sloping 
 banks, and shady recesses, varied by moss-houses, 
 stone basins hewn from the quarry, jets d'eau, Egyp- 
 tian obelisks, and a miniature Parthenon carved in 
 the same rock on which it stands. At the gate are 
 
216 GORDON CASTLE. 
 
 placed some inimitable old sculptured stones from 
 the ancient parish church of Fochabers, which be- 
 stow a look of great antiquity on the entrance, and 
 the whole is enlivened by a brilliant profusion of 
 showy flowers, and by the most emerald-coloured 
 grass you can fancy. This is a small fragment of 
 fairy land, wanting only the talking bird, the golden 
 water, and the singing apple. After leaving the 
 quarry, we entered a walk, shaded by enormous 
 natural hollies, which must be magnificent when the 
 dark varnished leaves are enlivened by their scarlet 
 berries like bunches of coral. Many are more than 
 forty feet high, with stems five or six feet in circum- 
 ference, and some being grouped together in clus- 
 ters of a dozen large trunks, I almost mistook for 
 moderate sized beeches. It is a curious provision of 
 nature for the protection of hollies, that all the lower 
 leaves, Avithin reach of cattle, are furnished vdth 
 strong prickles to serve as a defensive armour, but 
 the upper branches are not. 
 
 We were misled, on many occasions to-day, by 
 the uncommon size to which several species of trees 
 have enlarged themselves. You were diverted for- 
 merly, by the little girl at her lessons, who said, 
 " How can I make a mistake now, when I am 
 four years old !" but we, at a still more advanced 
 period of life, made a few to-day, during our wan- 
 derings through the park. Two fine aspen trees 
 
GORDON CASTLE. 217 
 
 passed themselves off upon me, at a distance, for full 
 grown oaks, till I observed them in a quiver of agi- 
 tation. Their stems were fourteen feet round, and 
 before severing into branches, the solid trunk rose 
 thirteen feet high. The bark was of so imiform a 
 tint, and the arch of leaves so perfect, that they 
 looked like two pillars of Elgin Cathedral come out 
 to take the air. Sir James Hall once planted a 
 cathedral of trees at Dunglas, the long aisles rep- 
 resented by the tall white columns of the poplar 
 trees, the branches of which formed, at one end, a 
 fine Gothic window. 
 
 Near those aspens at Gordon Castle, we saw a 
 noble ash tree, living in a most critical situation. 
 The massy trunk had been split from top to bottom 
 in the late hurricane, but both halves were yet 
 standing. At every breeze they yawned asunder, 
 and closed again, creaking and groaning in a most 
 fearful manner, as if haunted by some troubled 
 spirit. The leaves were still flourishing as gay as 
 ever, unconscious of their impending fate, but this 
 hoary patriarch of the forest is evidently struggling 
 with a mortal wound, though we hurried to a gar- 
 dener with information of the catastrophe, hoping 
 that an iron bandage might, for some time longer, 
 
 preserve it alive. When Lord S n, some years 
 
 ago, intended cutting down several ancient ash 
 
 trees, a friend induced him to grant them a reprieve, 
 
 19 
 
218 GORDON CASTLE. 
 
 by saying, in a tone of remonstrance, " Surely you 
 will not d sturb the ashes of your ancestors !" 
 
 The chief ornament of this ducal park is a 
 graceful lime tree, beneath which stood the favour- 
 ite seat of Duchess Jane, when surrounded by her 
 chosen companions. We sat under the vast shadow 
 of this forest chief, surrounded by a wall of leaves 
 v/hich swept to the ground on every side, forming 
 an arbour of 200 feet circumference, and there we 
 recalled the gay spirits and joyous scenes which 
 once enlivened this solitaiy bower. The Hama- 
 dryad who presides here, must then have enjoyed a 
 merry time of it ! Her Grace might almost have 
 worn the bracelet of another equally celebrated 
 Duchess, who, rather whimsically, desired this in- 
 scription to be set on it in diamonds, " I shall never 
 lose my spirits !" How happy for those who can 
 keep such a resolution, but the power to do so re- 
 quires a more secure foundation than our own most 
 resolute intentions. 
 
 One of the lodges in this park looks so exactly 
 as if built of parliament cakes, that it has been 
 called " The Parliament House." It is an excellent 
 imitation of a Jager's house in Switzerland, and 
 produces a very striking effect here. The old 
 gamekeeper who kept it was so eager for sport, 
 that the late Duke laughingly said to him one day, 
 '' You would shoot your own grandfather, if he fell 
 
GORDON CASTLE. 219 
 
 in your way 1" It used to be amusing long ago, 
 before moors were " let furnished," to discover how 
 very little conception the English had of game being 
 ever preserved in the Highlands, as they fancied it 
 was only necessary to land at Dundee or at Aber- 
 deen, and to load their guns. A Scotch proprietor, 
 some years ago, met a large party going north, fully 
 equipped with guns and dogs, but could not precisely 
 ascertain what moors they had leave upon, till at last 
 it came out, that they were merely at random, " going 
 to shoot in the north !" The rent of a barren moor 
 is now almost equal to that of the best arable land ! 
 
 Several years since, an English stranger, who 
 had never probably seen grouse or red-deer even in 
 the zoological gardens, returned from an excellent 
 days's sport, saying he had shot eight head of deer ! 
 They all turned out to be goats ! 
 
 I was much amused to hear a narrow escape 
 made by Sheridan when he was deer-shooting once 
 in the north ; but his ingenuity was equal to every 
 emergency, and delivered him on this occasion. 
 The Duke of Atholl having furnished him with an 
 escort of Highlanders, besides a luxurious and very 
 substantial luncheon, he began the day's sport by 
 sitting down to finish the wine and refreshments, 
 during which unusual commencement of the cam- 
 paign, his companions, after consulting aside for 
 some time, came forward in a body, and sternly 
 asked whether he wei-e any relation to " that 
 
220 GOKDON CASTLE. 
 
 wicked fellow Sheridan of London, who had dared 
 to abuse Lord Melville ?" 
 
 " What do you take me for ?" answered Sheri- 
 dan, with well-feigned indignation. " Related to 
 such a fellow as that ! If I could only catch the 
 rascal, I would hang him on the spot !" 
 
 " So should we, as soon as look at hira !" re- 
 plied the trusty escort, confidentially, and poor 
 Sheridan, who frequently told the story afterwards, 
 lost no time in making a pretext to hurry home. 
 
 If Gordon Castle degenerate into a mere shoot- 
 ing box, it has at least the attraction of a splendid 
 deer-forest, which has become a more fashionable 
 scene for sportsmen now, than even the moors. We 
 were shown the horns of a red-deer, shot by Alex- 
 ander Duke of Gordon after his Grace was eighty. 
 A circle of deer's heads is placed round the room, 
 each carrying an inscription to commemorate the 
 history of his own death, how, when, where, and by 
 whom he was massacred. Thus every skull be- 
 comes in itself a monument and an epitaph ! 
 
 We ought to believe any thing on sufficient evi- 
 dence, and the very incredible fact seems now as- 
 certained, that the deer eat their own horns ! It 
 was proved to the satisfaction of a learned jury once, 
 that a man had bit off his own nose, but this achieve- 
 ment of the deer seems nearly as difficult. Game- 
 keepers, to whom the horns might be a valuable 
 perquisite, hardly ever find any stray antlers during 
 
GORDON CASTLE. 221 
 
 the season at which they are shed, and fragments 
 have been discovered occasionally in the animal's 
 throat when dissected. One red-deer was found 
 dead, having apparently committed suicide, as it was 
 choked by a bit of its own horn. People who bite 
 their nails, must have a somewhat similar propensity ! 
 
 A lady remarked lately, that she felt thankful to 
 be born in an age when worsted work was in 
 fashion, as she never knew the real happiness of life 
 till she tried it, but nothing shows more obviously 
 the tedium suffered by gentlemen at home, than to 
 observe the hardships they will gladly endure in 
 search of what is called sport. A soldier would de- 
 serve to be covered with militaiy glory for encoun- 
 tering as many privations and difficulties to defend 
 his country, as a drawing-room fine gentleman will 
 cheerfully welcome in pursuit of a single red-deer. 
 He spends nights in watching on the hills, days 
 standing up to the knees in water, springs over peat- 
 bogs, lies perdu for hours among the heather, crawls 
 along the bed of a burn, or wades across a river, 
 reckoning every thing a pleasure that promotes this 
 fascinating amusement. A gentleman, lately, ac- 
 customed to all his comforts, gravely remarked, after 
 a few days' laborious experience, "• How pleasant it 
 was, to lie all night under a plaid upon the hill-side, 
 and to hear the rain pattering around !" 
 
 We had rain " pattering" in abundance all the 
 19* 
 
222 GORDON CASTLE. 
 
 way from Gordon Castle, for now a ceaseless busy 
 drizzle began. The foliage, however, formed so 
 thick a canopy along the approach, that we scarcely 
 remembered to raise an imibrella, though on reach- 
 ing the high road, it had become, like the Nile, a 
 river of mud. 
 
 In passing, we made a leisurely survey of the 
 fruit and vegetable gardens, containing six acres 
 within the wall j and I took a turn also in the hot- 
 houses, to remind myself of what summer used to be, 
 when we had warm weather occasionally. Here 
 we saw, in the richest perfection, figs, pines, grapes, 
 peaches, nectarines, — every thing in short, except 
 people to eat them, and around us were bowers of 
 blooming plants, — cactusses drooping unnoticed, 
 heaths looking beautiful in vain, and roses of a hun- 
 dred varieties " wasting" no ! that hackneyed 
 
 quotation is, like many others, worn to rags, and 
 must positively be left oif. There ought to be a se- 
 vere fine against every person now, who " sits like 
 patience on a monument" — who " drags at each re- 
 move a leno-th'ning chain" — who " blushes unseen" 
 — who " flies from grave to gay" — or who " hints 
 a fault and hesitates dislike," — but I shall not con- 
 clude my letter, as you expect, by saying, that my 
 heart is " untravelled," for with my whole heart I 
 enjoy travelling, and regret every mile we leave 
 behind, as if I were losing an estate. 
 
FOCHABERS. 
 
 Lord Harry has written a novel — 
 
 A story of elegant life; 
 No stuff about love in a hovel, 
 
 No sketch of a clown and his wife. 
 But full of such elegant touches ! 
 
 Our lips in derision we curl, 
 Unless we are told how a Duchess 
 
 Conversed with her cousin, the Earl. 
 
 My dear Cousin, — The unfortunate man who 
 had his choice of working in the mines, or reading- 
 through a foho volume, preferred the bodily to the 
 mental labour ; but you shall herewith be con- 
 demned unheard to endure several folio pages this 
 morning, and to work out a perfect mine of infor- 
 mation, therefore, put on your spectacles of criticism, 
 and accompany me through my life and adventures 
 during a long and busy day. 
 
 At Fochabers, Murray the innkeeper, w^ho retired 
 from business this year, was originally a foundhng, 
 and never had a guess of his own history, but all his 
 life he annually receives a blank cover containing 
 ^£50. Now, there is a ready made novel for you at 
 once ! According to all the rules of romance, he 
 must some day find himself out to be, at least, a 
 
224 FOCHABERS. 
 
 peer. I wonder what titles and estates will unex- 
 pectedly prove to be his. 
 
 The inhabitants of this little hamlet should all 
 become literary characters, seeing, that besides the 
 many academies already in action, a native of Foch- 
 abers, recently bequeathed .£20,000 to establish 
 schools here j and Mr. Dick left so large a fortune 
 to increase the salaries of schoolmasters in the 
 counties of Aberdeen, Banff, and Elgin, that here the 
 alphabet might be printed in letters of gold. At the 
 little inn of Grantown, our plates displayed the 
 alphabet an inch long marked all round the margins, 
 that travellers may lose no time in exercising their 
 intellects while eating ; and I heard of lessons being 
 taught in politics lately, by having political senti- 
 ments written in pastry across the tarts for dinner ; 
 but now, even while washing and combing their 
 hair, children are taught appropriate verses ; and 
 when I hear a mob of ragged boys singing, " This 
 is the way we wash our face," it gives me pleasure 
 to know that the ceremony is ever performed at all. 
 
 Infant schools would be a most beneficial inven- 
 tion for both parents and children in the lower ranks, 
 even though it involve the Spaitan principle of a 
 separation between them, if we could only obtain a 
 concession on behalf of those very juvenile students, 
 that there shall be half the quantity of lessons ad- 
 ministered, and double the quantity of play allowed. 
 
FOCHABERS. 225 
 
 The mechanical, and ahnost regimental exercisea 
 which these baby scholars go through, under the 
 misapplied name of amusement, amount to so strict 
 a restraint on mind and body, that they should, in 
 fairness, be ranked in the class of lessons, because 
 nothing but perfect natural freedom can be a com- 
 plete relaxation to children, and so incessant a drill- 
 ing as the little creatures undergo must prove inju- 
 rious and exhaustino;. 
 
 We inspected one infant school near Fochabers, 
 where ninety-five children under eight years old 
 were improving their minds. I certainly never saw 
 a more beautiful group ! Ninety of them at least 
 were pretty, while all, without exception, looked 
 clean, well-dressed, and healthy. The day having 
 proved wet, none of them got out to play, but the 
 pains-taking schoolmistress kept up, in a close hot 
 room, a succession of singing, marching, and coun- 
 termarching, mechanically, till the whole juvenile 
 party were at last allowed to sit down, suffering 
 agonies of drowsiness. When we entered, three or 
 four had fallen back on the laps of those behind, 
 others required a rousing like Baron Trenck, several 
 were singing, the eyes rolling in their heads, a few 
 had made a desperate struggle and cried themselves 
 awake, while many approached as nearly to som- 
 nambulism as Lady Macbeth. The continual sing- 
 ing is in itself somniferous j a certain degree of 
 
226 FOCHABERS. 
 
 monotony becomes quite unavoidable in the lessons ; 
 and even the clapping of hands and beating of feet, 
 though excellent as an occasional exercise for very- 
 young pupils, cannot fairly come under the desig- 
 nation of play, which must be the dictate of sponta- 
 neous instinct and buoyant natural spirits. 
 
 It is most true, as the well known proverb says, 
 that " an idle mind is Satan's favourite workshop," 
 and poor children, when left at home are lamenta- 
 bly neglected, while they cannot but thus acquire 
 confused notions of right and wrong, being more 
 punished by their busy hard-working parents, 
 for being merely troublesome, than for the 
 worst moral offences, besides becoming hope- 
 lessly idle, ignorant, and slovenly, impeding the 
 labours of those who support them, and learning 
 neither habits nor principles in accordance with re- 
 ligion. During the few years of childhood, there- 
 fore, when, being too young for any profitable la- 
 bour, they might have time to learn the reading of 
 their Bibles, it is indeed a blessing that they have 
 the opportunity to acquire all such knowledge of 
 holy Scripture as human teaching can impart ; and 
 certainly it has been a useful discovery of modern 
 times, that when children are taught to read, they 
 can be taught also to understand what "they read, 
 therefore, much gratitude is due to those who, by 
 the institution of infant schools, rescue young fami- 
 
FOCHABERS. 227 
 
 lies from the ruin of both body and soul, which 
 must, too probably, result from the unavoidable ne- 
 glect which awaits them at home. Yet even the 
 very best things may be overdone, so that the 
 forced intellects and forced spirits of infants should 
 be allowed a very large proportion of entire, uncon- 
 strained relaxation, to recover their natural tone. 
 Before seven or eight years old, the disposition, 
 feelings, and principles, can successfully be regulated, 
 but very little knowledge can be safely instilled at 
 so feeble an age, without overstretching the facul- 
 ties, as much as if a tottering child attempted to 
 carry a burden intended for a man. The heart is 
 capable of being trained before the head, but all 
 that can be gained by unnatural stimulus in unripe 
 age, is lost to mind and body afterwards. 
 
 The four elder children at Fochabers exhibited 
 astonishing powers of memory, and a knowledge of 
 the Bible which a divinity student could scarcely 
 excel. It was perfectly amazing ! No spectator 
 could have been otherwise than delighted, as w^e 
 were, and all I would advocate while discussing the 
 system of early training among poor children, is, 
 that for every hour of lessons, they should be al- 
 lowed an hour of real undeniable romping, and be- 
 come initiated occasionally in the mysteries of hide 
 and seek, or blind man's buff. One of the most 
 learned and accomplished scholars I ever knew, 
 
228 . CULLEN HOUSE. 
 
 used to mention that he was formerly very partial 
 to chess, but finding it more a study than a game, 
 it did not afford sufficient relaxation to be consid- 
 ered a mere amusement, nor was it useful enough to 
 be followed as a pursuit, therefore, he unwillingly 
 relinquished that interesting employment of time, 
 but I saw him soon afterwards engaged with a joy- 
 ous young party of children, playing at battledore 
 and shuttlecock, which seemed thoroughly to unbend 
 for the time, a mind long and successfully exerted 
 for the best interests of man. We are all aware 
 that, as the bow requires to be often unstrung, the 
 more pliant it may be, the more absolutely necessary 
 that reaction becomes. 
 
 Apropos of very juvenile precociousness, I was 
 greatly diverted lately to read an advertisement, of 
 a new astringent application for the gums, beginning, 
 " Children cutting their teeth are respectfully in- 
 formed !" 
 
 We had a charming drive from Fochabers to 
 CuUen House, one of the most splendid places in 
 Scotland, formerly the seat of Lord Findlater's family, 
 as long as there was a Lord Findlater to inherit it, 
 but now belonging to the family of Grant, Lord 
 Seafield. It might be exercise enough during winter 
 to walk every day through all the seven drawing- 
 rooms, and to stir the seven fires ! You would be 
 quite charmed by the magnificent suite of apartments. 
 
CULLEN HOUSE. 229 
 
 and by the beautiful entrance-hall, decorated with 
 rare exotics and marble busts, — the one being the 
 most evanescent, and the other the most durable 
 ornaments with which we can adorn our abodes. 
 
 There are several battalions of pictures here, both 
 foreign and domestic, many of which are extremely 
 interesting. In the first room we saw such a con- 
 gress of kings, that one would require Hume's His- 
 tory of England to bring them all to mind. The 
 fine full-length likeness of James the Sixth, by 
 Mytens, encountered an odd adventure in its day, — 
 a riotous mob, during the revolution, tore it down 
 from the walls of Holyrood House, and were kick- 
 ing this royal portrait ignominiously along the street, 
 when Lord Findlater, then Chancellor of Scotland, 
 made a spirited attack on the angry multitude, and 
 successfully rescued his Majesty from so degrading 
 a situation. 
 
 The extinct line of Lords Findlater inherited 
 great talents, and were all considered supremely 
 handsome, particularly the Earl who flourished when 
 the Union was signed. The portrait of him at Cul- 
 len House fully justifies his reputation, being of a 
 most noble and commanding aspect, very unlike the 
 flippancy of character he displayed, when, after 
 signing the roll which put an end to the indepen- 
 dence of Scotland, he coolly tossed away his pen, 
 saying, " There is the end of an old song !" 
 20 
 
230 CULLEN HOUSE. 
 
 Six years afterwards, however, Lord Findlater's 
 dormant patriotism was awakened by beholding 
 various acts of injustice to Scotland, in consequence 
 of which, he tried to get a new edition of the old 
 song, having made a motion in the House of Lords 
 to dissolve the Union ; and he divided the votes, 
 fifty-four against fifty-four, but was ultimately de- 
 feated by four proxies. 
 
 Another Lord Findlater we saw who distinguish- 
 ed himself as an agriculturahst, and introduced tur- 
 nips in this neighbourhood, for which he will scarcely 
 be thanked by the epicures in milk and cream. A 
 poor criminal was condemned to severe punishment 
 once, for stealing a turnip, because, as the judge 
 sternly remarked, " turnips lead to legs of mutton." 
 
 One family portrait in this gallery is admirably 
 painted, and the hand has been thought so perfect 
 a chef d'oeuvre, that an artist once came from Italy 
 to study it. The countenance looks more alive 
 than many living men ! This picture represents 
 the most accomplished and highly gifted of all the 
 Findlater family, who overstrained his great intellect 
 until at length he became deranged, and died in the 
 most melancholy of all ways. His expression of 
 coimtenance looks excited, though indicating ex- 
 treme talent, and his dress appears remarkably pic- 
 turesque, but you will not easily suppose it graceful, 
 when I mention that he is equipped in a loose yel- 
 
CULLEN HOUSE. 231 
 
 low dressing-gown and a white nightcap ! By a 
 curious coincidence I mistook his portrait for one of 
 Cowper, who serves as another melancholy evidence 
 how often " great wit to madness nearly is allied." 
 The ladies in this family seem all to have been 
 less good-looking than their lords, and if a " Book 
 of Beauty" had been published in those days, would 
 scarcely have been as well entitled to fill a page. 
 The last Countess of Findlater was a foreigner, and 
 became blind during many of her latter years. The 
 portrait of her predecessor was hung up, as a mark 
 of extraordinary respect, in the county rooms of Ab- 
 erdeen, — a public testimony to female excellence 
 almost unprecedented. When this Lady Findlater 
 was told that, owing to the embarrassed condition 
 of her husband's affairs, the estate must be sold, she 
 firmly replied, " No ! not an acre !" and by extra- 
 ordinary management she saved the whole of this 
 beautiful property, besides which, she has signal- 
 ized her memory by leaving a magnificent evidence 
 of her taste and liberality. The house formerly 
 stood in an almost unapproachable position, being 
 nearly surrounded by a broad and very deep chasm, 
 the sides of which were equally difficult to ascend 
 or to descend, and almost impossible for a carriage, 
 but Lady Findlater erected, at the expense of her 
 own privy purse, a noble bridge of one splendid 
 arch, sixty feet high and eighty-two feet wide, 
 
232 CULLEN HOUSE, 
 
 which springs across the widely separated precipi- 
 ces, and forms a beautiful object from the windows, 
 as well as a most convenient access. 
 
 The trees which adorn this glen are particularly 
 fine, and the river scenery most enchanting, with an 
 abundant flow of crisp clear water, and the green 
 sloping banks charmingly wooded and gayly peo- 
 pled by a musical colony of birds. One great de- 
 light of the country arises from the intimacy we 
 form with all the animal species, which soon be- 
 come our familiar friends; cattle, horses, dogs, 
 sheep, deer, cows, and every living creature, be- 
 come a source of interest, whose habits of life, tem- 
 per, manner, and conduct, it is a perpetual amuse- 
 ment to study. Even a bee-hive is equal to any 
 rout in a city, being as crowded, hot, and noisy, 
 while each individual carries a sting which may or 
 may not be used as he pleases. I could sit for an 
 hour giving language to their busy hum, or, like 
 Gil Bias, making dialogues for the birds. 
 
 Over all the windows of this venerable pile may 
 be seen eyebrows of handsomely sculptured stone, 
 with initials, dates, coats of arms, and grotesque 
 heads, in addition to which, several moral and re- 
 ligious sentences are inscribed in very antique char- 
 acters. Two of these which I deciphered contain 
 very sound divinity, and convey a pleasing testimony 
 to the spirit of piety in which this ancient house was 
 
CULLEN HOUSE. 233 
 
 originally founded, and for which, in the existing 
 generation, it is still pre-eminent, — " Faith is the 
 ground of our hope," we find engraved beside one 
 window, and near that which adjoins it, " Hope is 
 the anchor of faith." 
 
 Our drive towards Banff led through a rich 
 granary, where, not many years ago, the whole 
 countiy was a wide wilderness of bog. Here the 
 poor can scarcely be called poor at all, they are so 
 liberally attended to by Lord Fife, the chief proprie- 
 tor in this neighbourhood, who is said to employ 
 above three hundred persons on the grounds of DufF 
 House alone, giving work to those who will work, 
 and money to those who prefer being idle. The 
 daily distribution which takes place here of gold and 
 silver coin would astonish even Dr. Alison, and out- 
 run his utmost wishes, but the system produces many 
 practical illustrations of that old German proverb, 
 " a shilling earned is worth two shillings begged." 
 It is a pleasure, at the same time, to know that all 
 who will obey the fourth commandment, which as 
 imperatively orders people to labour during six 
 days of the week, as to rest on the seventh, may 
 there find employment ; and I was much amused to 
 hear, that when children are at work on the gravel 
 walks, a shilling is frequently concealed under the 
 stones, that the first who rakes it up may receive 
 this welcome reward for diligence and activity. 
 20* 
 
234 BANFF. 
 
 What a curious contrast might be drawn be- 
 tween the munificence of Lord Fife, who is said to 
 distribute a larger income on gratuitous charity than 
 any nobleman in Scotland, and the parsimony of his 
 predecessor, Lord Braco, who picked up a farthing 
 on his own approach once, and being earnestly im- 
 portuned for it by a beggar, hurried the treasure into 
 his pocket, saying, " Fin' a farthing to yoursell, puir 
 body I" This old nobleman was so celebrated a 
 miser, that I felt much inclined to sound the pannels 
 and floors at Duff House, in search of hidden trea- 
 sure. 
 
 Several very primitive customs are still observed 
 in this part of the country. When farmers come 
 to market, they pay nothing at the inn for being 
 lodged or entertained, but some time afterwards, 
 " mine host" performs a tour of visits among all 
 those who favoured him with their company, and 
 then he graciously accepts presents, according to 
 the wealth or the gratitude of his ci-devant guests, 
 who load him with hay, cheese, butter, eggs, or 
 poultry, till, like the lady in Roman history, he is 
 almost buried beneath the weight of gifts and offer- 
 ings heaped upon him. A very convenient custom 
 is also observed by poor people, when about to 
 marry upon nothing, who have what is appropriately 
 called "a penny wedding." The happy couple 
 call on each of their neighbours to announce the 
 
BANFF. 235 
 
 propitious event, and to inquire at the same time 
 what the friends are willing to subscribe towards 
 increasing and prolonging the comfort of their 
 wedded life. At these marriages two hundred peo- 
 ple sometimes assemble, while no guests are ex- 
 pected to appear without an offering in some shape 
 or other, a loaf, a cheese, a bottle of whiskey, or 
 even, in cases of extreme poverty, half-a-dozen 
 eggs. The entertainment which ensues is kept up 
 occasionally for several days, and instead of bottle- 
 sliders, on which to pass the bottles, they are fre- 
 quently placed on blue bonnets. 
 
 Every mortal is weary of listening to accoimts 
 of the melancholy festivities which take place at 
 Highland funerals, but I could not help being 
 amused to hear, that when three Strathspey lairds 
 set out to attend the burial of the late Rothiemur- 
 chus, one of them gravely remarked, " How drunk 
 we shall all be this time to-morrow !" 
 
 At a great chieftain's house where guests used 
 formerly to be over the mast-head in claret and 
 champagne, but where modern sobriety and decorum 
 have been introduced by the present proprietor, an 
 old Highland laird was heard indignantly muttering 
 to himself as he left the table, " Oich ! if this isn't 
 the first time she ever dined at Castle Grant, and 
 was able to go up the stairs by hersell." 
 
 I was shocked to hear that an old clergyman. 
 
236 BANFF. 
 
 well known for his convivial propensities, who died 
 last year, wishing his funeral to become peculiarly 
 jovial, bequeathed a large stock of claret for his 
 friends to finish on the occasion, and his old boon 
 companions standing in a circle round the grave, 
 filled their glasses to his memory, and afterwards 
 poured a share of the contents on the earth beneath 
 which he was interred. 
 
 The neat and cheerful town of Banff is proverb- 
 ially alluded to by the Scotch as Coventry is in 
 England. If one of the common people be angry 
 at another, he exclaims in a tone of bitterness, " Go 
 to Banff!" I felt perfectly well satisfied, however, 
 to visit this very respectable town, though often ex- 
 tremely indignant formerly, at being told by our old 
 nursery-maid to go there. The streets were clean 
 and airy, though not particularly remarkable in any 
 way, but probably the inhabitants contrive to be 
 very happy here, and if not, we cannot help them. 
 
 The object of chief interest in this neighbour- 
 hood is DufF House. The park seems many miles 
 in circumference, beyond which, we admired in 
 every direction the fine fields brought into cultiva- 
 tion, and the flourishing hedges planted by Lord 
 Fife, who has resided here uninterruptedly for some 
 years past in strict seclusion, occupied in benefiting 
 the place and people around. The style of archi- 
 tecture here, is, like most of Adams's plans, quite 
 
DUFF HOUSE. 237 
 
 French, a tall, square, handsome edifice, of massy 
 proportions, ornamented with Corinthian pilasters, 
 and externally scattered over with stone vases and 
 statues, but the house is greatly in want of wings to 
 give it lightness. Within we found it perfectly 
 Louvrized with pictures, all remarkably interesting, 
 and many first rate works of art, at which criticism 
 may vainly level her eye-glass. 
 
 You never saw walls so crowded as these with 
 heroes, statesmen, authors, and beauties of former 
 days, every body, in short, who ever lived, and a 
 great many more. We might have called over a 
 muster-roll of all the celebrated names in Scotland, 
 or elsewhere, and the answer would be, "Herel" 
 It appeared like living a century in an hour, when 
 we paraded through ten or twelve large rooms, 
 glancing along the line of celebrated personages, 
 whose names had once resounded throughout the 
 world. How many stories and remembrances rushed 
 into our thoughts as we contemplated the features 
 with which they had passed through life, and tried 
 to trace an expression suited to their well-known 
 characters and adventures. It was a singular pano- 
 rama ! The great, the good, the wicked, and the 
 profligate, all side by side in a strange equality, that 
 seemed like that of the grave itself! Among other 
 odd combinations, we observed one uncongenial 
 quartette, consisting of Dr. Dodd, Dean Swift, 
 
238 DUFF HOUSE. 
 
 George Buchanan, and lastly, John Knox, of whom 
 the Regent Morton said in his funeral panegyric, 
 " There lies he who never feared the face of man." 
 He was, indeed, one who, to use the language of 
 Shakspeare, " took the buffets and rewards of for- 
 tune with equal thanks," being singly and solely 
 devoted to the cause he had embraced ; but in the 
 collision of opposite opinions, how carefully should 
 the very best of Christians guard against excess ! 
 Our venerable Scottish reformer was far from de- 
 siring that wide devastation among our churches for 
 which his own words seemed to give a license, 
 w^hen he said, " Pull down the nests, and the rooks 
 will fly," and for uttering which. Dr. Johnson said, 
 he should have been buried in the highway ; but 
 those who once rouse the multitude to violence, 
 might as well throw down the bars of a menagerie, 
 and expect still to master the powerful and danger- 
 ous inhabitants. In the one case as much as in the 
 other, the weak govern the strong by intellectual 
 superiority, but the moment mere animal force 
 comes into play, this aspect of affairs is entirely 
 reversed. 
 
 The old housekeeper here, a well-known per- 
 sonage, who has been sixty years in office, having 
 learned by rote, a hst of the pictures and artists, 
 makes most amusing havoc of the foreign names, 
 " Sir Francis Kennawlis for Knollys, and Sir God- 
 
DUFF HOUSE. 239 
 
 frey Kennawler," but she was peculiarly perplexed 
 by the approximation of names between a fat laugh- 
 ing Moliere, and a dark Spanish-looking Murillo. 
 The good woman would have a poor chance of tol- 
 eration from the gentleman who broke off his mar- 
 riage with a young lady, because she betrayed such 
 ignorance as not to know the difference between 
 Mrs. Montagu and Lady Mary Wortley Montague ! 
 
 One of the best pictures here, a miniature in oil, 
 of a philosopher contemplating a skull, was painted 
 by the celebrated blacksmith, Van Eyck — not Han- 
 del's harmonious blacksmith, but one of still greater 
 notoriety. 
 
 We admired, in one room, a conclave of bloom- 
 ing beauties, all associated together without very 
 special reference to rank or character, but each ap- 
 parently balloted for on the score of pre-eminent 
 loveliness. No eastern harem described by Lady 
 Mary Wortley Montague could produce a group of 
 Sultanas at all to be compared with Lucy Waters, 
 Lady Carlisle, Jane Shore, Lady Castlemain, the 
 Countess of Coventry, Queen Mary, the Duchess of 
 Portsmouth, or Nell Gwyn — a pretty set in every 
 sense ! What some people would call mixed soci- 
 ety — or rather unmixed, where none were quite 
 respectable. 
 
 Ah ! Shore could tell what ills from beauty spring, 
 And Sedley curs'd the charms which pleased a king. 
 
240 DUFF HOUSE, 
 
 Several of these ladies wore hoops, expanding 
 their dresses till they looked like a tent, covering 
 half an acre of carpet, but though costumes invented 
 by the caprice of fashion become, in a few years, 
 ludicrous even in the eyes of those who wore them, 
 such lovely features, moulded into beauty by nature's 
 own magical touch, are admired alike in every suc- 
 ceeding age, and in every varied rank. 
 
 One of the most curious portraits here, is a full- 
 length in black, representing the Duchess of Rich- 
 mond, by Vandyke. Her Grace looks as if she had 
 lived on nothing more solid all her life than po- 
 etry and sentiment, reading an elegy for breakfast, 
 and a sonnet for dinner. The matrimonial part of 
 her history is much more extraordinary than fiction ! 
 She married first a wealthy man of low origin, who 
 very complaisantly died soon, leaving her a rich 
 widow. Having been next engaged to Sir George 
 Rodney, he was treacherously jilted for the Earl of 
 Hertford, on which occasion her disappointed lover 
 penned a farewell letter in his own blood, and killed 
 himself Her second husband, the Earl, having in 
 due time expired, she mounted another step in the 
 ladder of preferment by marrying the Duke of Rich- 
 mond, and being once more set at liberty, her am- 
 bition aspired to a crown, and she set her widow's 
 cap at old King James the I., who actually proved 
 invulnerable, and thus cruelly stopped the career of 
 
DUFF HOUSE. 241 
 
 her promotion, when she had probably often sohlo- 
 quized, hke Lady Macbeth, " Glamis and Cawdor ! 
 the greatest is behind !" 
 
 We admired much a lovely picture of the youno- 
 Chevalier St. George when a boy, dressed in crim- 
 son and gold. The Chevalier D'Eon appeared also, 
 in full uniform, his face like the knocker on a door; 
 and not far off Colonel Gardiner, the hero of Pres- 
 tonpans, a fine military-looking figure in full capar- 
 ison for battle, wearing a pair of jack boots so 
 enormous that you wonder how he ever got into 
 them, or is ever to get out. There never died on 
 the field of battle a braver soldier or a better Chris- 
 tian, and most heroically did he realize his word, 
 that " having one life to sacrifice for the good of his 
 country, he would not spare it !" His own regi- 
 ment fled, but he cheered on another which had 
 been deprived of its colonel, and was twice severely 
 wounded before receiving the mortal blow of which 
 he died. Then having finished his earthly duties, 
 we may believe and hope, that his emancipated 
 spirit experienced the truth of that faith in which 
 he had a short time previously said, " Let me die 
 when it shall please God ! I am sure I shall go to 
 the mansions of eternal glory, and enjoy my God 
 and ray Redeemer in heaven for ever." 
 
 A portrait is here of George the Second, who 
 seems intending to be dignified, but looks as if he 
 21 
 
242 DUFF HOUSE. 
 
 were beginning a minuet ; and the first Earl and 
 Countess of Fife are represented in robes as if 
 walking at a coronation. The Admirable Crichton 
 makes a noble appearance in the crowd — that hero 
 possessing almost fabulous gifts and accomplish- 
 ments, who was treacherously assassinated at the 
 age of twenty -two, by his pupil, the Duke of Medi- 
 na's profligate son. There is a wonderful intensity 
 of expression, like life itself, in all the portraits of 
 this remarkable being, and his conversation was so 
 brilliant and captivating that people held in their 
 breath when he spoke. 
 
 The Constable of Bourbon's is an interesting 
 portrait ; and Lord Chesterfield is here, looking 
 polite even on canvass. 
 
 If I might assume the appearance of any one I 
 chose, you would see me return with the countenance 
 of Mrs. Abingdon, who is represented archly glancing 
 out from behind a curtain, with so animated an 
 expression, and such a glow of youth and loveliness, 
 that it would enliven any one to look at her. Even 
 the great moralist Dr. Johnson found this lady irre- 
 sistibly fascinating, and when rallied by a daring 
 friend for having gone to the theatre once when she 
 acted, he replied, " When the piiblic cares the 
 thousandth part for you that it does for her, I will 
 go to your benefit too !" Madame de Montespan's 
 portrait might be an imaginary houri in paradise, it 
 
DUFF HOUSE. 243 
 
 is of such unearthly beauty, but without a spark of 
 intellect, and not at all likely to have captivated 
 Lavater. 
 
 Two peeresses might dispute the palm here of 
 personal pre-eminence. The notorious Duchess of 
 Cleveland, full length, in blue velvet, and the late 
 Duchess of Gordon, wearing her robes of state, and 
 looking like majesty personified. I could write on 
 for ever about this gallery, which might comprise a 
 history of all mankind, and womankind also, but 
 you will begin to complain that my letter is all vel- 
 vet gowns and damask curtains. 
 
 " Lastly, and to conclude," as clergymen say in 
 their sermons, we observed a portrait in Raeburn's 
 best style, of Lord Fife himself, wearing his undress 
 military unifoi-m, when he commanded the Inver- 
 ness-shire militia, and so like that any old soldier 
 in passing must have saluted. But an extin- 
 guisher has fallen over my paper, and it is time to 
 cut myself short, though that is scarcely possible 
 now, after covering nearly a yard and a half of let- 
 ter paper. You have seen the sympathetic ink 
 which becomes visible only when held to the fire, 
 but I wish mine may disappear as soon as you begin 
 to think me " dull, stale, flat, or unprofitable." As 
 people say that a letter should be a sort of family 
 newspaper, you may now consider my name as re- 
 corded among the fashionable departures from Banff. 
 
FYVIE. 
 
 Now planning ttiuch, now changing what we plann'd, 
 Pleased by each trial, not by failures vexed, 
 And ever certain to succeed the next ; 
 
 Cluick to resolve, and easy to persuade . 
 
 Crabbe. 
 
 My dear Cousin, — If you ever wish to study 
 *' the greatest happiness principle," make a tour in 
 the Highlands, and be not over particular about ac- 
 commodation, for the instant travellers become too 
 anxious about comfort^ all comfort is at an end, and 
 I care little for the vicissitudes of carpets or no car- 
 pets, arm-chairs or three-legged stools, as long as 
 every thing is clean, and we get no practical illus- 
 trations in our sleeping apartments of entomology, 
 — or damp-ologj, the greatest bugbear of all on a 
 journey. 
 
 Without meaning a disrespectful thought of any 
 other county, I must say there are none superior to 
 Aberdeenshire for interest and grandeur, both natural 
 and architectural. Fyvie Castle, built in the time 
 of Robert Bruce, being considered one of the most 
 extensive, picturesque, and ancient edifices in Scot- 
 land, A resolved, coute qui coute, to take a 
 
 glimpse of it, little anticipating what the cost would 
 
FYVIE. 245 
 
 be, for it turned out an adventure of first rate annoy- 
 ance and difficulty, but " all is well that ends well." 
 A stage-coach passes daily within half a mile of 
 the little village of Fyvie, about dinner-time, so we 
 resolved to be dropped there one morning, and to 
 be picked up the next, thus allowing time to scruti- 
 nize the Castle before proceeding to Aberdeen. 
 
 After making a good start from Banff, there 
 came on such a down-pour of rain, that it was quite 
 a natural curiosity for heaviness, and continued to 
 fall with unremitting diligence till night. In short, 
 it was what Matthews described as " a dreepin' wat 
 day," and when we paused at the turnpike to alight, 
 I could not but hesitate about being drowned alto- 
 gether in attempting to gain a glimpse at Fyvie 
 Castle. The road seemed one unfathomable depth 
 of mud, and we had half a mile to wade before 
 reachino; the inn ! No rational beinq; would have 
 attempted it, but I had seen a most eccentric look- 
 ing porter's lodge, which excited my unbounded 
 curiosity, as a sample of what might be seen, and 
 several persons strongly recommended us not to be 
 easily discouraged, and made light of the distance — 
 made still hghter of the rain, and when I inquired 
 what sort of inn we were likely to find at Fyvie, a 
 factor who lived near, protested it was " clean and 
 tidy, though not very large." All this sounded ex-^ 
 ceedingly plausible, till I discovered, on ahghting, 
 21* 
 
246 FYVIE. 
 
 that this personage, who had been shivering outside, 
 wished to fill up our vacant seats within, and hurried 
 off, wishing us " a pleasant evening !" 
 
 After a most fatiguing promenade beneath a 
 perfect cascade of rain, we reached the village, 
 and looked about in vain for any sign, or signs to 
 indicate the Royal Hotel of Fyvie. No " Red Lion," 
 or " Blue Goat," or " Aberdeen Arms" could be 
 seen, but I was at last directed to a small cottage, 
 looking like the wing of an adjoining grocer's shop. 
 Here we found the landlady drinking tea, and sur- 
 rounded by a numerous family of untidy children, 
 and the whole party seemed to be struck speechless 
 with consternation at the unwonted apparition of 
 travellers. Chaucer tells us, the Queen of the 
 Fairies once positively promised, that no woman 
 should ever, on any occasion, be at a loss for an 
 answer, but her majesty was faithless on this occa- 
 sion, as none seemed to suggest itself now, when 
 we requested the worthy hostess to provide us with 
 rooms, and, indeed, the case at first wore a most un- 
 promising aspect. The only suite of apartments in 
 her house consisted of one sitting-room, containing 
 a sort of contrivance which called itself a bed, and 
 across the passage was a closet, about six feet 
 square, vidth a borrowed light, and containing a 
 small sofa-bed, into which a traveller, whatever his 
 dimensions might be, must contrive, like a soldier 
 
FYVIE. 247 
 
 forcing on regimental shoes, to fit himself, whether 
 they fit or not. 
 
 Even these apartments it would have been too 
 much happiness to find disengaged, but a stranger 
 had arrived some hours before, and secured the par- 
 lour-of-all-work, where he was now drinking tea ! 
 What an idea of unspeakable luxury and comfort it 
 gave me at this moment to hear of any one in the 
 full enjoyment of a fire and a cup of hot tea ! I 
 never knew their value before ! 
 
 You are acquainted wdth a gentleman who 
 locked his door, and pretended to be asleep one 
 night at an inn, when he saw a party of ladies 
 arrive, who could not, he was aware, be accommo- 
 dated, and for whom he had determined not to dis- 
 compose himself, but Mr. Menzies, the fortunate 
 occupant of the first and only floor at Fy\4e, was 
 quite of a different school, and having accidentally 
 heard of our arrival, he, with the most chivalrous 
 politeness, insisted on relinquishing the whole house, 
 and hurried off in the rain, saying he could depend 
 upon being welcome at the clergyman's hospitable 
 manse, where he intended now to remain. 
 
 We had scarcely time to express our thanks 
 before he vanished, leaving not a trace behind, and 
 we proceeded without loss of time, to examine into 
 the capabilities of the larder at Fyvie, where the 
 bill of fare for dinner being a total blank, we found 
 
248 FYVIE. 
 
 it would be imprudent to quarrel with our bread and 
 butter, and sat down with the best of all appetites 
 to tea. You know of one gentleman who lets an 
 inn near his moors, on condition that the landlord 
 shall make it too uncomfortable for any traveller or 
 sportsman to think of remaining there ; and I can 
 bear testimony in favour of the worthy host there, 
 that for breakfast we had tea without cream, salt 
 butter, oatcakes, and porridge, but if there be ever 
 a vacancy in the management of that concern, I 
 could recommend a very efficient successor not a 
 hundred miles from Fyvie. 
 
 We were in the act of laughing over all our 
 discomforts, when the door opened, and our good 
 genius Mr. Menzies appeared, accompanied by the 
 parish clergyman, who, the moment he heard of our 
 predicament, had " cloaked, umbrella'd," and hur- 
 ried over to us with so cordial an invitation to his 
 fireside, that before half an hour elapsed, we were 
 comfortably domesticated with our reverend friend 
 and his sister, in their pretty little sitting-room, 
 leaving to Mr. Menzies the luxurious accommoda- 
 tion of the inn. 
 
 This evening passed away most enchantingly, 
 though my happiness was rather impaired by one 
 very teasing perplexity. No imaginable device 
 could enable me to discover the name of our very 
 hospitable host ! I clandestinely examined the 
 
FYVIE. 249 
 
 title-pages of two Bibles on the table, thinking his 
 designation must be inscribed there, but the only 
 information conveyed I knew already, as the inscrip- 
 tion was, " Manse of Fyvie !" The silver forks and 
 spoons at supper were equally uncommunicative ; I 
 could not see the cover of an old letter in any quar- 
 ter to assist me I In short, my ingenuity was 
 balked on every side, till next morning, when it ac- 
 cidentally occurred to me, that I had not yet exam- 
 ined the corner of a towel, on which, to my great 
 relief, I discovered the name of our friend and ben- 
 efactor, Mr. Manson, which we shall certainly not 
 forget, connected as it is with the recollection of 
 such a deliverance, followed by so agreeable an 
 evening. 
 
 Dr. Patterson, author of " The Manse Garden," 
 might see his book reduced to practice here, where 
 the flower-beds are in brilliant order, and the vege- 
 tables fit to gain the prize at any competition. The 
 perfection of order around this " glebe," is said to 
 be quite in harmony with the good order of a whole 
 parish under similar superintendence, for in every 
 thing belonging to any individual, we generally 
 trace the same spirit of activity or of indolence, 
 and I have often observed, that as a straw tells how 
 the wind blows, even the aspect of a gentleman's 
 lodge may be considered a tolerably fair criterion 
 of how the whole estate is managed. The concerns 
 
250 FYVIE, 
 
 of others are not likely to meet with the best atten- 
 tion from any one who is lazy about his own, or 
 who must use, on mere temporal affairs, the melan- 
 choly language of Scripture, " Mine own vineyard 
 have I not kept !" but in this small district we found 
 three schools in admirable order, which were in- 
 spected by Mr. Menzies, the trustee appointed to 
 examine the three counties in which Mr. Dick's 
 legacy to schoolmasters must be distributed, and 
 who reported them all to be extremely efficient. 
 
 I crossed the village chm'chyard, through a wil- 
 derness of wet grass, and sheltered by an umbrella, 
 to visit the grave-stone, adorned with hour-glasses 
 and skulls, of Annie Smith, a miller's daughter, 
 who was heroine of that much esteemed old ballad, 
 " Tifty's Annie." This young lady, having been 
 admired by the Laird of Fyvie,who offered to marry 
 her, she unfortunately preferred the trumpeter of the 
 Castle, and perseveringly discouraged his master's 
 suit. Her brother, after vainly endeavouring to ex- 
 tinguish her disinterested preference of this long- 
 winded lover, at last became so furiously irritated, 
 that, in a paroxysm of rage, he struck her violently. 
 The fair Annie, being of very sensitive feelings, 
 never recovered the shock, but pined away and 
 died. During her last moments, she entreated to be 
 turned towards the tower of Fyvie Castle, where 
 her favoured lover was usually to be seen blowing 
 
TYXIE. 251 
 
 his trumpet; and after his decease, the generous 
 Laird of Fyvie himself erected a leaden image of 
 his more successful rival, which is now conspicu- 
 ously to be seen blowing his trumpet towards the 
 mill of Tifty, and thus commemorating that melan- 
 choly tragedy. The old ballad is extremely inter- 
 esting, and several of the verses show off the aris- 
 tocratic lover to immense advantage. 
 
 " Her father struck her wondrous sore, 
 As also did her mother ; 
 Her sisters always did her scorn ; 
 But -woe be to her brother. 
 
 Lord Fyvie he did wring his hands, 
 Said, ' Alas ! for Tiftie's Annie,' 
 The fairest flower's cut down by love, 
 That e'er sprung up in Fyvie. 
 
 woe betide Mill o' Tiftie's pride. 
 He might have let them marry ; 
 
 1 should have giv'n them both to live 
 Into the lands of Fyvie. 
 
 Ye parents grave, who children have. 
 In crushing them be canny, 
 Lest when too late you do repent, — 
 Remember Tiftie's Annie." 
 
 In the same churchyard we saw a beautifully 
 sculptmed monument to the Honourable General 
 Gordon, representing a phoenix rising out of the 
 flames, which might have been considered a fine 
 
252 FYVIE CASTLE. 
 
 Christian emlDlem, tut I was disappointed to observe 
 only an inscription from Ovid in Latin. Our sym- 
 pathy with the dead is only perpetuated when we 
 find a record of that Christian faith and hope, which 
 must ultimately bring all who really felt it, into one 
 happy and everlasting home, but a heathen poem, 
 beautiful as it may be, speaks of nothing beyond the 
 grave, and is, therefore, unsuitable on a tomb-stone, 
 that solemn memento, closing over all the earthly 
 concerns of a mortal being, and intimating, whether 
 in the language of Scripture or not, that his spirit 
 has been summoned into the awful presence of our 
 eternal Creator. 
 
 Next morning we laid siege to Fyvie Castle, 
 which looks like the Methuselah of old houses, and 
 ought to be placed in the Antiquarian Museum. 
 The gate is a perfect cluster of steeples, and the 
 same pointed towers adorn the edifice itself, each 
 surmounted on its lofty pinnacle by fantastic leaden 
 figures, placed in every variety of attitude. They 
 give it somewhat the look of a magician's enchanted 
 dwelling, where the prisoners have been turned into 
 stone, and I suppose any daring knight who can 
 blow a blast on the trumpet of Tifty's Annie's lover, 
 will see the whole crumble into powder. 
 
 Large as this magnificent old castle is, a perfect 
 romance in stone and mortar, the more ancient half 
 was taken down some years ago, having become 
 
FYVIE CASTLE. 253 
 
 ruinous, and threatening a downfall. The entrance, 
 through a wall nine feet thick, is defended by an 
 outside door, studded with massy knobs of iron, and 
 within that powerful defence stands a cross-barred 
 gate of singular construction, so complicated in 
 workmanship, that the neighbouring blacksmith con- 
 fessed he could not divine how it was manufactured. 
 We hazarded about six guesses, which were all proved 
 to be wrong ; and as no one living is in the secret, 
 I " gave it up !" In the lower part of the south- 
 western tower, there is said to be an arched room, 
 which, having neither door nor window, is totally 
 inaccessible; but under such circumstances there 
 can only be a conjectural knowledge of its exist- 
 tence at all. 
 
 What was formerly the prison at Fy vie Castle is 
 now metamorphosed into the wine cellar, where 
 people must be locked out, instead of being locked 
 in. We were not, of course, made free of the cellar, 
 but I became greatly interested in seeing the fire- 
 proof charter-room, quite an appalling dungeon, en- 
 tirely lined with iron. A second closet within was 
 exhibited, the iron door of which requires the strength 
 of two persons to open ; and when the housekeeper 
 desired me to walk in, I thought, with a shudder, of 
 " The iron shroud," and of " The mistletoe bough." 
 If ever I am afflicted with a nightmare, I shall cer- 
 tainly fancy myself shut by a spring-lock in that old 
 22 
 
254 FYVIE CASTLE. 
 
 dungeon at Fy\ie Castle ! Our cicerone observed, 
 with some humour, in allusion to a certain very re- 
 cent robbery, " This is a safer place than the bank 
 at Aberdeen !" 
 
 In all my experience of housekeepers, which has 
 not been small, I never met with one so shrewd and 
 intelhgent as the lady in waiting here. The Aber- 
 deenshire people are noted in Scotland for being 
 alarmingly clever, very much as the Yorkshiremen 
 are in England, therefore, I supposed at first, that 
 our mistress of the ceremonies might be considered, 
 perhaps at the ordinary average of Aberdeen talent ; 
 but we were afterwards told, that her case is pecu- 
 har, even in that neighbourhood. If ever we hur- 
 ried past any thing worthy of notice, she eagerly 
 summoned us back, repeatedly begged me to be 
 more at leisure, and when I admired a quantity of 
 beautiful coloured silk embroidery, adorned with 
 flowers, which actually beat nature out and out, 
 done by the Countess of Aberdeen, remarking, at the 
 same time, that ladies were scarcely so industrious 
 in the present day, she complaisantly replied, that 
 " ladies now have many better occupations." 
 
 When our visit drew towards a close, the good 
 woman insisted beyond measure, that we should ac- 
 cept a glass of wine ! A flight of fancy quite be- 
 yond the imagination of any ordinary housekeeper ; 
 and though w^e positively declined the offer, yet I 
 
FY VIE CASTLE. 255 
 
 very gladly availed myself of a pressing invitation to 
 inspect her own room. Here the walls were hung 
 round with a perfect General Assembly of clergy- 
 men, as large as life, dressed in their full canonicals, 
 and positively you have often paid your shilling for 
 seeing a worse exhibition. It was pleasing to be- 
 hold so numerous a collection of Scottish worthies, 
 though in general I admire the principle expressed 
 by a Swiss clergyman, who declined sitting for his 
 portrait, even at the earnest request of an attached 
 congregation, on the ground of that text, " We 
 preach not ourselves, but Jesus Christ the Lord." 
 Owing to the affectionate partiality of many parish- 
 ioners, we see in almost every exhibition of pictures 
 a large proportion of clergymen, — then follows the 
 advertisement of a print, price £1, Is. — and some 
 years afterwards appears a posthumous memoir and 
 frontispiece, edited by the son or nephew, who feels 
 called upon to publish a " private diary," professedly 
 intended for no eye but those of the writer and his 
 own children. It is a great pity that persons who 
 write such very confidential documents never seem 
 to hit on the only sure plan of keeping them private, 
 which can be very easily accomplished by the ap- 
 plication of a taper, or by a short cut into the fire- 
 place. Nothing should be more avoided, by those 
 who profess Christian integrity, than to record 
 thoughts and actions, under pretext that they shall 
 
256 FYVIE CASTLE. 
 
 remain unseen and unknown, when all the time a 
 consciousness is felt, that the whole world shall 
 hereafter he invited to peep over the author's shoul- 
 der, and read what has been said. The first attempt 
 we find in the line of public privacy, was made by- 
 Horace Walpole, in his entertaining letters, and 
 since his time, those who stood the very highest for 
 talent, and even for piety, have not disdained to wear 
 the same flimsy veil, avoiding the responsibility of 
 their own act, by throwing the blame upon survivors, 
 and, as Dr. Johnson said, leaving a loaded gun be- 
 hind them, which they have the inclination but not 
 the courage to fire. 
 
 The broad fine staircase at Fyvie Castle is con- 
 sidered quite unique, and might be a study for any 
 architect. It is ornamented with armorial bearings, 
 and built in a succession of lofty arches, all placed 
 at right angles, each flight of steps forming an arch 
 over the flight beneath, so that we seemed to be 
 ascending a pyramid of tunnels, caves, or bridges, 
 all carved in nearly solid stone. The effect is most 
 singular. 
 
 It has been unhandsomely alleged, that tartan 
 was first invented by the poor of Scotland, who 
 could find nothing but rags of various colours to 
 clothe themselves in ; and it has also been conjec- 
 tured, that a clan-tartan is like a coat of arms, dif- 
 ferent colours being peculiar to different families, so 
 
Fy\'IE CASTLE. 257 
 
 that those who were aUied to the Stuarts adopted 
 a stripe of red, and when they intermarried with 
 the Bruces, a stripe of black was added; but all 
 these assertions seem fabulous. Tartan is not sup- 
 posed to be a very ancient manufacture, as none is 
 to be seen on the oldest pictures. The Gordon 
 plaid is one of the handsomest, and makes admira- 
 ble furniture in some of the rooms here, enlivened 
 by the family badge of a thistle on every chair. I 
 like heraldic furniture, with as many coronets, crests, 
 and quart erings as can be reasonably introduced, and 
 quite admired the King of Wirtemberg for mount- 
 ing regal crowns on his birds' cages. 
 
 Every genuine Highland clan wears some pe- 
 culiar plant as a badge of distinction; and you 
 should always see the Macdonalds,on state occasions, 
 mount a sprig of heather, the Macgregors carrying 
 the pine, the Grahams and Gordons with a thistle, 
 the Sinclairs living upon clover, and the Buchan- 
 ans still armed with a birch rod, which they adopt- 
 ed, I suppose, in commemoration of King James' 
 tutor. 
 
 Fyvie Castle changed proprietors frequently in 
 former days. Originally the property of Sir Henry 
 Preston, one of the many lowlanders whom Robert 
 Bruce transplanted to this neighbourhood, it after- 
 wards escaped to the Meldrum family, and then 
 settled for some time in possession of the Chancel- 
 17* 
 
258 FYVIE CASTLE. 
 
 lor, Earl of Dunfermline, whose arms are sculptured 
 on the Castle in every direction, inside and out, with 
 full length inscriptions to commemorate his reign. 
 This estate w^as finally purchased by the present 
 proprietor's grandfather, Lord Aberdeen, when he 
 married for his second wife the Duke of Gordon's 
 daughter, and the property was given to her eldest 
 son. General Gordon, whose portrait we greatly 
 admired, being one of the best visible in this house, 
 or perhaps in any other. The frame is hung round 
 with the standards of his regiment festooned in loose 
 draperies, which add greatly to the effect of his 
 handsome uniform, and fine military aspect. He is 
 equipped in full Highland garb, his plaid streaming 
 in the wind, his cap raised in his hand, and his 
 broad-sword extended in the air. Nothing can be 
 more spirited and striking ! This fine picture seems 
 meant to illustrate the family motto, " Follow For- 
 tune." The General has evidently kicked down 
 the Coliseum in passing, for it lies in ruins behind 
 him, and he is rapidly ascending over broken pillars, 
 cornices, and columns, to where Fortune sits aloft, 
 ready to crown him with her choicest gifts, among 
 which we must acknowledge, that Fyvie Castle was 
 not the least I 
 
 You would be in ecstasies with the park, varied 
 by a river, a lake, a forest of noble trees, and flocks 
 of sheep, which seem to understand the picturesque, 
 
ABERDEEN. 259 
 
 they scatter themselves so judiciously over the slo- 
 ping banks, and in short, the only fault that can be 
 invented for this never-to-be-enough-admired place 
 is, its being so outrageously difficult to reach. 
 
 During our journey from Fyvie to Aberdeen, we 
 saw several stony fields, most of which have now 
 been improved into fertility, at a vast expenditure 
 of labour, while others being perfectly paved across, 
 no labour could improve. You might fancy in some 
 parts of this country, that it rained stones instead of 
 Avater ! and towards the west, where rocks abound 
 most, the superfluous stones are swallowed up in 
 what is called an " Aberdeenshire dyke," built about 
 six feet high, and twenty or thirty feet broad, fit for 
 a wagon to be driven on, and looking as if mate- 
 rials had been collected for erecting a village. 
 The operation of extracting these rocks from the 
 ground, is like drawing teeth out of their sockets, 
 but after inflicting so painful a process, the agricul- 
 turist must have more than common pleasure, in 
 seeino- the best entertainment for man and horse, 
 turnips, wheat, oats, and barley, all flourishing 
 around him. 
 
 In Aberdeenshire, the enthusiasm lasted longer 
 than in any other country for Charles Edward's 
 family. The gardener at Lord Saltoun's proved so 
 stanch to the cause, that when some officers on the 
 Protestant side were visiting his master, a bet was 
 
260 ABERDEEN. 
 
 laid that nothing could induce him to drink King 
 George's health. Accordingly he was sent for, and 
 the senior captain making him a handsome present, 
 said he had heard much of his high character, and 
 proposed that they should unite in pledging a bum- 
 per to King George's health. The sturdy Jacobite 
 raised his glass and drank it off, saying emphatically, 
 " Here's to our rightfu' and lawfu' King !" The 
 Captain started up in a rage, saying, " Why, you 
 rascal ! that's not King George !" To which the 
 other slyly replied, with a nod, " I'm vera muckle 
 o' your way o' thinking, Sir !" 
 
 Dr. Johnson remarks, " it seems like frivolous 
 ostentation to write a solemn geographical descrip- 
 tion of any city in our own island, as if we had 
 been cast on some newly discovered coast." Here 
 we are now at Aberdeen, the Oxford of Scotland, 
 where, during many centuries past, whenever stran- 
 gers pre-eminent for rank or learning arrived, the 
 magistrates called in procession, and presented them 
 with a bumper of wine in the ancient and illustrious 
 " Cup of Bon Accord," but either the custom is 
 now discontinued, or they have not yet heard of our 
 arrival ! ! This town is equally celebrated for its 
 haddocks and its professors, both being incompara- 
 bly excellent in their line, and having long enjoyed 
 great and deserved popularity. Diplomas are not 
 given so promiscuously here as formerly ; but I 
 
ABERDEEN. 261 
 
 once knew three English schoolmasters who had 
 been created doctors at Aberdeen ; and Dr. Johnson 
 said of one Scotch university, that it had got rich 
 " by Degrees." My late father, who, besides re- 
 ceiving diplomas from twenty-five foreign societies, 
 was member of almost every literary and scientific 
 institution at home, once received a humorous letter 
 from his old cotemporary, Sir Adam Fergusson, 
 directed to him as usual, and then followed 
 « A.M.— F.R.S.— TUVWXYZ." 
 
 In the college here may be seen the most ter- 
 rifying portraits of our 106 Scottish monarchs, from 
 a period cotemporary with the time of Abraham, to 
 the present day, the whole succession being painted, 
 I believe, by one artist, who should have been hung 
 instead of his pictures. 
 
 Mackray's hotel would be a perfect paragon of 
 comfort, were it not for a set of noisy travellers re- 
 cently arrived, who never tire of ringing the bells, 
 so we have a merry peal from morning till night, 
 and all night besides. Those who are least accus- 
 tomed to have servants at command, become most 
 arbitrary at an inn, and like to agitate the waiters, 
 who are flying about the house like lamplighters to- 
 night, and have burst into our quiet room several 
 times by mistake in the hurry of hearing so many 
 conflicting bells. You have not probably forgotten 
 the old housekeeper who used to tell us formerly, 
 
262 ABERDEEN. 
 
 that she had saved money all her life in order to be 
 a lady for one week, and the chief part of her pro- 
 jected dignity seemed to consist in arriving at a 
 hotel, dressed in a silk gown, and in ringing for 
 the waiters as often as she pleased ! I have never 
 since observed people particularly severe on the 
 bell-ropes, without thinking that they must have as 
 short an allowance of consequence and authority. 
 
 Being informed on Sunday, that Bishop Skinner 
 intended to preach at the Episcopal Chapel, I went 
 to hear him, but was shocked on entering, to be- 
 hold, near the door, a fine full-length monumental 
 statue in white marble, by Flaxman, bearing the 
 solemn inscription, " Sagred to the Memory of 
 Bishop Skinner!" I stood petrified with astonish- 
 ment at this very sudden catastrophe ! How could 
 it have escaped the waiters, who had all combined 
 in assuring me he was to preach ! Not many min- 
 utes afterwards, however, a clergyman, exactly re- 
 sembling the marble image, stood face to face before 
 it, gravely taking his station in the reading-desk, 
 and commenced divine service, but it was not till 
 the whole had been concluded that the mystery was 
 cleared up. I then ascertained, that the episcopal 
 dignity has continued hereditary in the same family 
 for two generations, and that the venerable father 
 of the present Bishop is commemorated by this mon- 
 ument. The surprise was as great to me, but not 
 
ABERDEEN. 263 
 
 quite so unpleasant, as that of a gentleman who 
 lately observed a beautiful macaw sitting so im- 
 moveably on a pole, that, never doubting the bird 
 was stuffed, he walked close up, to examine the 
 plumage, and only discovered his mistake, when it 
 seized him by the nose. 
 
 Aberdeen has always testified peculiar partiality 
 for the Episcopalian church, and the inhabitants 
 have recently erected a very handsome chapel, 
 which cost jGGOOO, with a painted glass window, 
 copied from Carlo Dolci's picture of our Saviour 
 blessing the sacred symbols. In the Rev. Edward 
 Ramsay's very interesting sermon on behalf of the 
 Scottish Episcopal Church Society, we find a pic- 
 ture drawn of clerical poverty and privation, not to 
 be imagined or believed without such testimony as 
 he bi'ings. One clergyman in the north derives at 
 present, from two congregations, an income of only 
 jESO, another receives only ^£20 per annum, a third 
 announces his professional income to be <£2, another 
 had a living, if it could be called a living, of ^£12, 
 and the last I shall mention was starving on £6 ! ! 
 Some of these worthy divines have congregations 
 sufficiently wealthy, but I have generally observed, 
 that the two professions to which we owe the deep- 
 est obligations are those that people feel most un- 
 willing to remunerate, the doctor and the clergyman. 
 
 In one church at Aberdeen, we heard the most 
 
264 ABERDEEN. 
 
 distorted attempt at English ever promulgated from 
 a pulpit. It was very little easier to understand 
 than if the preacher had been speaking on the plan 
 recommended by an Irishman to a Highlander who 
 addressed him in Gaelic, " Can't you turn your 
 tongue the other way, and spake English !" Not 
 a single vowel got fair play on this occasion, for 
 Scotchmen who wish to be peculiarly correct, gen- 
 erally omit them entirely ; and the prepositions, 
 which puzzle our northern grammarians more than 
 can be conceived, w^ere all on duty in the wrong 
 place. If public speakers would only deal in plain, 
 honest, broad Scotch, as the late Lord Melville used 
 to do, it becomes perfectly comprehensible even to 
 a cockney, but the distorted dialects people invent 
 for themselves to conceal a provincial accent, be- 
 come, to most listeners, quite an unknown tongue. 
 
 Several streets in the venerable town of Aber- 
 deen are exceedingly handsome, but being built of 
 granite so very hard, that iron instruments are fre- 
 quently broken in attempting to work it, the build- 
 ings are almost entirely without ornament, in what 
 architects would probably term *' a severe style." 
 No trimmings are to be seen around the window^s, 
 which look as if they were merely patched on the 
 surface of a bare wall, — no decorations or porticos 
 over the doors, but high, naked-looking piles of 
 stone arise on every side, of a cold bluish white, 
 
DUNOTTAR CASTLE. 265 
 
 which it chills one to look at. How different from 
 the rich warm tint, like oiseau de paradis, on the 
 free-stone of Elgin ; yet certainly Union Street is 
 undeniably magnificent, and the bridge of a single 
 arch stupendous. 
 
 The late M. P. for this county, Mr. Fergusson 
 of Pitfour, used to give the result of his Parlia- 
 mentary experience in these words, which would 
 astonish statesmen of the present day, who are all, 
 we hope, so very different — " I have represented 
 Aberdeenshire for half a century, during which, I 
 never was present at a debate I could avoid, nor 
 absent from a division I could get to. I have heard 
 many speeches that convinced my judgment, but 
 none that ever influenced my vote. I once, and 
 only once, voted on my own opinion, but that w^as 
 the most erroneous vote I ever gave. He who 
 would be easy in Parliament, must always support 
 administration, but never take office." 
 
 Fourteen miles south of Aberdeen may be found 
 the picturesque and extensive ruin of Dunottar Cas- 
 tle, seat of the Keiths, Earls Marischal of Scotland, 
 whose origin is so lost in antiquity, that they are 
 conjectured to have been Princes of the Catti in 
 Germany, before the Bourbon or Austrian dynasties 
 were heard of The catastrophe of 1715 caused 
 this ancient title to be forfeited ; but the last Earl 
 nobly represented his long line of ancestry, for he 
 23 
 
266 DUNOTTAR CASTLE. 
 
 became the chosen and distinguished friend of Fred- 
 erick the Great, and his brother, Marshal Keith, 
 need only be named, to recall the most chivalrous 
 recollections of bravery and generalship. The Em- 
 press of Russia presented him with a sword valued 
 at jei500, as a small testimony of her esteem, and 
 after a life of warlike achievements, he died victo- 
 riously on the field of battle. These were two of 
 the most distinguished brothers Scotland ever pro- 
 duced. The site of Dunottar Castle is in the ocean, 
 perched on a high peninsula, nearly the whole of 
 which is covered by the walls, which surround a 
 spacious court. 
 
 A gentleman once remarked of a dull visiter, 
 " what a pity he is not ill-natured, as that would be 
 an excuse for turning him out of the room ;" and 
 you may probably begin to think, if this rather dry 
 letter goes on much longer, that, spiced with a little 
 peevishness, it might be quite fit for the fire; so 
 leaving you to make the best of it, as you always 
 do of every thing, I remain — at Aberdeen, as much 
 as anywhere else — ^your affectionate cousin. 
 
CASTLE FRASER 
 
 Lady Percy. " What is it carries you away ?" 
 Hotspur. " Why! a horse, madam, a horse.'' 
 
 My dear Cousin, — It occurs to me at this mo- 
 ment, as being cm-ious,in how many different things 
 people can be identified. When present by their 
 features, when absent by their voices, and even 
 w^hen out of both sight and hearing, by their hand- 
 writing. All are so peculiar to the individual, that 
 I begin to think the collecting of autographs a per- 
 fectly respectable pursuit, as they certainly give 
 some insight into character ; therefore, next time 
 you write to me, take yom* best pen, in case of ap- 
 pearing in my album. I suppose the Duke of Wel- 
 lington and 0' Conn ell never accept an invitation to 
 dinner, or are sorry that a previous engagement 
 prevents them, without imminent danger of their 
 being afterwards carefully embalmed on a folio 
 sheet of paper, beside specimens of scribbling from 
 Grace Darling, Joseph Hume, Dr. Chalmers, Lady 
 Blessington, Lockhart, Wilson, Captain Hall, Han- 
 nah More, Wilberforce, Mrs. Couch, and the whole 
 Bench of Bishops. 
 
 I never could have guessed half the annoyance 
 
268 CASTLE FRASER. 
 
 endured in society by the race of lions, unless I had 
 happened often to see Sir Walter Scott suffering 
 under it, who would frequently have been thankful 
 to put on a domino, or to adopt invisibility, as every 
 body pricked forward their ears if he merely asked 
 what o'clock it was, and ceased to breathe when he 
 made a remaik on the weather. 
 
 After leaving Aberdeen, we proceeded, in our 
 usual touch-and-go style of travelling, through the 
 charming valley of Strathdon, to inspect a large as- 
 sortment of castles, new, old, and middle-aged, which 
 embellish the rivers Dee and Don, two rival streams, 
 the comparative merits of which are keenly disputed 
 by lovers of the picturesque ; and as I actually do 
 not claim to be a perfectly infallible judge on these 
 subjects, you shall have the impartial verdict of a 
 poet, who thinks he has settled the point by an 
 elegant couplet : 
 
 " One foot of Don's worth two of Dee, 
 Except it be for fish and tree." 
 
 Among the best remaining specimens of old 
 Scottish fortresses, we admired none more than 
 Castle Fraser, which seems in perfect preservation, 
 with a curious old French court behind, and possess- 
 ing a noble round tower, nearly a hundred feet 
 high, quite a model of ancient architecture, being 
 surrounded by handsome balustrades, and defended 
 
CASTLE FRASER. 269 
 
 by stone cannon. I had unluckily obtained false 
 information respecting this place, being assured that 
 no access could possibly be obtained to see it, and 
 an exaggerated representation was drawn, of its 
 having been fortified inaccessibly against the intru- 
 sion of idle curiosity. I merely ventured, therefore, 
 to station our carriage as a corps de reserve at the 
 
 gate, and with A for an advanced guard, stole 
 
 upon tip-toe along the approach, concealed myself 
 in an ambuscade behind a large plane tree, and from 
 thence took a hasty survey of the premises. After 
 having counted the windows, estimated the height of 
 the towers, guessed the thickness of the walls, ad- 
 mired the curious gable-headed windows, wondered 
 at the number of projecting little turrets, and ascer- 
 tained for certain, that the castle is a very great 
 deal larger at the top than at the foundation, my 
 curiosity having been rather increased than satiated, 
 I took courage, and asked a servant boy in livery, 
 who was passing towards the castle, whether we 
 could possibly see the house, but he appeared panic- 
 struck at the sight of strangers, stared as if we had 
 been apparitions, and suddenly absconded at full 
 
 speed ! A was amused beyond measure, but 
 
 this castastrophe completely intimidated me, and I 
 slowly retreated in good order, almost expecting the 
 cannons to fire upon us. 
 
 The country round this neighbourhood exhibits 
 
270 CASTLE FRASER. 
 
 infallible symptoms of resident proprietors, the fields 
 being all thoroughly drained, hedged, planted, cul- 
 tivated, and presenting a general aspect of pros- 
 perity. Our drive was delicious, till we reached the 
 splendid modern, spic-and-span-new castle recently 
 built by Mr. Gordon of Cluny. It is still quite damp 
 from the press, and will not be habitable for some 
 months. The plan is designed by a young unpro- 
 fessional artist, who, wonderful to relate, omitted 
 neither door, window, nor stair-case, and has been 
 altogether so successful, that he deserves three 
 rounds of applause. The granite is so very hard, 
 that it would almost need to be cut with a diamond, 
 but after years of laborious chiselling, a magnificent 
 front of exquisite masonry has been completed, 
 though, I dare say, to calculate the expense might 
 puzzle Cooker himself. 
 
 I must now give you a " graphic sketch," 
 painted expressly for the occasion, of this extensive 
 building. The style is very peculiar, and must be- 
 long, I should guess, to no particular order, and to 
 the class specio-cissima. A high circular tower at 
 one end, four stories high, is surmounted by a square 
 ditto three stories higher, which seems to have 
 grown out of the other, and which is curiously 
 flanked at the summit by a pointed turret, stuck on 
 apparently by accident. This lofty pile is a grand 
 exti avaganza in stone, reaching nearer the moon 
 
MONYMUSK. 271 
 
 than any modern tower I know, while the main 
 body of this edifice abounds in cheerful, airy, well- 
 proportioned rooms. The castle wants nothing now 
 but good fires, furniture, and inhabitants. 
 
 The park displays abundance of grass, and is 
 embellished with middle-aged trees, but has not a 
 drop of water to show in the whole landscape, — 
 not so much as a canal or a horse pond. Some of 
 the ground lies so flat, as almost to defy draining, 
 and after great expense incurred to improve the 
 soil, Johnston the drainer was brought to inspect it, 
 and questioned whether the ground did not now 
 look " rather parkish ?" to which he dryly answered, 
 " No ! it is rather lakish." 
 
 Next in this world of ancient feudal castles, we 
 passed the snug, tidy, quaint-looking old place of 
 Monyrausk, better situated than most of the others, 
 near the Don. Not far off, we admired the solemnly 
 pleasing shades of a fine forest, rather whimsically 
 named Paradise. The proprietor of this little for- 
 tress unfortunately took the key in his pocket, when 
 he went to the Continent, so on our inquiring 
 whether it might be seen, a maid, who was sitting 
 with closed doors, showed her profile through a 
 small crevice, and gave us warning to quit. You 
 see, therefore, the proverb is not alwuys true, 
 " Chateau qui parle, et femme qui ccoute, va se 
 rendrer 
 
272 MONYMUSK. 
 
 The little village of Monymusk is quite a model 
 of neatness, built in the form of a large square, with 
 a grass common in the middle, enclosed by a fence 
 of rough stakes, and by a luxuriant inner hedge of 
 thorn. Here many of the villagers were strolling 
 about with a look of cheerful indolent leisure, as if 
 they had worked enough for the day, and felt enti- 
 tled now to be happy. Nearly all the common 
 people in Scotland walk with their hands in their 
 pockets, — better certainly than in any other person^s 
 — but it gives them an anxious forlorn appearance, 
 as if in chase of their last shilling. 
 
 The Prioiy here has been handsome, and still 
 preserves some remains of grandeur, though six 
 hundred years old. The ancient Saxon arches at 
 each end are entire, and look as if they might last 
 six hundred years more ; or perhaps as long as the 
 earth continues spinning on her axle. 
 
 The small inn-parlour at Monymusk is decorated 
 with a little fancy print, which, though the subject 
 be melancholy, might make the gravest person 
 smile. It represents Prince Leopold and Britannia 
 mourning at the tomb of Princess Charlotte — he, 
 appropriately costumed in a flowing black tragedy- 
 cloak, the very image of a second-rate actor, and 
 she, weeping in a rose-coloured dress, yellow body, 
 and pink feathers, over an urn, very like the glass 
 globe in an apothecary's shop, or as if she were in 
 
CASTLE FORBES. 273 
 
 the last agonies of sea-sickness. The very lion at 
 her feet seems wiping his eyes with his paw, look- 
 ing more like a lion in distress than any thing I 
 ever witnessed before. 
 
 We passed Pitfichy, a ruin which belonged to 
 the family of the well known General Hurry, of 
 the Parliamentary army, and Tillyfour, which was, 
 I hope, in better repair w^hen Queen Mary inhabited 
 it for one night only, and by particular desire. Our 
 carriage wheels then turned themselves towards 
 Castle Forbes, belonging to the premier Baron of 
 Scotland. This is a finely situated modern house, 
 exhibiting, of course, a majestic round tower, which 
 is quite the newest fashion in building. The oppo- 
 site tower is square. Formal and regular plans are 
 now quite out, and every thing in the free-and-easy 
 style of architecture, with as few of the windows, 
 doors, or turrets to match as possible. We admired 
 this place exceedingly, and the Castle has a beauti- 
 ful effect in the distance, peeping out through a 
 mass of wood, about half-way up the bank, as if it 
 had stopped in ascending, to take a look of the 
 country, and remained stationary to admire it for 
 ever. No wonder! The Don flows gracefully 
 through a gay panorama of plantations, castles, 
 farms, and distant hills, a correct inventory of which 
 would fill the rest of my paper. 
 
 You must one day visit the seven tall towers of 
 
274 KILDRUMMY CASTLE. 
 
 Kildrummy Castle, formerly considered impregnable, 
 but which a sparrow now may take possession of. 
 They were built by St. Gilbert, in the twelfth cen- 
 tury, and all enterprising tourists should positively 
 make a digression off the road, to ascend the dark 
 ghosty-looking stairs, and to fight many battles over 
 again on the spot which once steeped those walls 
 in the blood of heroes. Every stone has had its ad- 
 ventures; but Kildrummy Castle was finally be- 
 trayed to the English army by a blacksmith, bribed 
 to this treachery with the promise of as much gold 
 as he could carry. In pursuance of his engagement, 
 he threw a red-hot bar into the hayloft, which set 
 the castle on fire, and during the consequent confu- 
 sion, it was taken, but the mercenary traitor suffered 
 a frightful punishment from his own recent allies, 
 who, detesting his crime, kept their promise in a. 
 literal sense, by pouring melted gold down his 
 throat ! Our old Scotch proverb truly says, " better 
 a little fire that warms, than mickle that burns." 
 
 I am now about to adopt a grand historical tone, 
 and to tell you a little more, for even if you know 
 my tale already, yet, like Sir Christopher Hutton in 
 the Critic, you will be better of hearing it all over 
 again. 
 
 Kildrummy Castle, formerly the chief seat of the 
 powerful Earls of Mar, always distinguished itself 
 greatly in Scottish history. When Robert Bruce 
 
KILDRUMMY CASTLE. 275 
 
 first asserted his claims to the crown, and met with 
 reverses, he lodged his Queen and daughter here, 
 under charge of his brother Sir Niel. Being threat- 
 ened with a siege, the ladies fled to a sanctuary, 
 where they were betrayed by the Earl of Ross ; and 
 after a brave defence for some time, they were only 
 captured through the treachery of Osborn, an Eng- 
 lishman, who blew up the powder magazine. Thus 
 the ladies had only saved themselves from Scylla, 
 and plunged into Charybdis, or, to use a vulgar 
 phrase, they were " out of the frying-pan into the 
 fire." By the way, Hume or Ahson would blot 
 such an expression out of their pages, and I wish at 
 present to be quite upon their model, so try to for- 
 get it. 
 
 Kildrummy Castle was again beleaguered in 
 1335, when the misfortunes of David Bruce had left 
 this kingdom, during three years, in the hands of 
 Edward Baliol and his partisans. It held out 
 bravely against the Earl of Athol, who being sur- 
 prised by a very inferior force, and killed, in the 
 forest of Kilblain, the tide of fortune turned, and 
 swept away the whole English party from the en- 
 tire kingdom of Scotland, which now, as on all oc- 
 casions, proved unconquerable. 
 
 A third siege in 1404 is quite romantic, when it 
 was assailed by a band of robbers, commanded by 
 Alexender Stewart, natural son of the notorious 
 
276 KILDRUMMY CASTLE. 
 
 character, infamous in our Scottish annals, "The 
 Wolf of Badenoch," whose real title was Earl of 
 Buchan, being third son of King Robert the Second. 
 Though he burned and robbed Elgin Cathedral, ill 
 treated his wife, a Countess in her own right, and 
 distinguished himself by every species of atrocity, 
 yet on his tomb-stone in Dunkeld Cathedral, we find 
 him complaisantly stated to be " of good memory !" 
 How different wall be the record kept on earth, from 
 that which shall be heard at an eternal tribunal ! 
 
 The adventurous young freebooter and his gang 
 attacked Kildruramy Castle when it was occupied 
 by the hereditary Countess of Mar in her own right, 
 then a widow. lie stormed it, gained possession, 
 made a mockery of delivering up the keys and pa- 
 pers into her own hand at the gate, and finally 
 obliged her to declare that she voluntarily took him 
 as her husband, for better or worse, — indeed he 
 could hardly be worse. The successful adventurer 
 now styled himself Earl of Mar, and became, as 
 times go, quite a respectable man ! He was ambas- 
 sador " extraordinary !" to England, fought in a 
 tournament with the Earl of Kent, commanded a 
 Scottish army against the Lord of the Isles at Har- 
 low, was generalissimo to the Duke of Burgundy in 
 support of the Bishop of Liege, and retaining the 
 Earldom, though his wife died without children, he 
 finally married Lady Duffyl an heiress in Brabant- 
 
CRAIGIEVAB CASTLE. 277 
 
 We caught, in passing, a distant glimpse of 
 Craigievar, a singular old Castle, the lower-half 
 being a plain square tower entirely without orna- 
 ment, and so narrow, you might suppose it had worn 
 a strait-waistcoat, but above it juts out on all sides, 
 in a strange, any-how-fashion, with little gable-ends, 
 little turrets, and little windows, as if a whole vil- 
 lage had scrambled up and clustered on the roof. 
 Supreme above all, waved a large showy banner, 
 which the post-boy, with an approving nod, pointed 
 out, informing me it was " A Reform flag, and had 
 never been taken down since the passing of the 
 bill !" The ancestor of this family obtained his 
 baronetage from King Charles, against whom he 
 soon afterwards took arms. In an old ballad of those 
 times, describing the death of " Bonny John Seton, 
 a baron bold," in memory of whom the family still 
 bear on their shield a heart dropping blood, we find 
 these lines, showing what mixed motives often dic- 
 tate extreme measures: 
 
 "Oh, spoil him, spoil him ! cried Craigievar, 
 Him spoiled let me see ; 
 For on my word, said Craigievar, 
 He bore no good will to me," 
 
 If you have a laudable curiosity to see Macbeth's 
 
 cairn, he was decidedly killed near this, at Lumpha- 
 
 nan, three miles beyond Kincardine O'Neil, and 
 
 though most of the monumental pile was pilfered 
 
 24 
 
278 CKAIGIEVAR. 
 
 formerly to build cow-sheds and pig styes, yet enough 
 still remains to identify the spot. 
 
 As Shakspeare says, " the property of rain is to 
 wet;" so, as we were treated in the evening to a 
 mixture of showers and wind, with a few scruples 
 of Scotch mist, we first attempted a stoppage at the 
 Bridge of Alford, but finding only a curtainless, car- 
 petless, dingy apartment, pre-occupied by sportsmen 
 for fishing, we merely snatched a chop, looked for 
 the field where the battle of Alford was fought, and 
 where Lord Huntly's eldest son was killed, and then 
 proceeded, by the beautiful banks of the Don, to this 
 little perfection of a Highland farm-inn at Kincar- 
 dine O'Neil, kept by a cordial, hearty old landlady, 
 who would have served me up three courses at tea, 
 if I had not barricadoed the table against any thing 
 more. After bringing up six kinds of tea-bread, 
 eggs, and marmalade, she made a desperate attempt 
 to force a dish of chops or chickens upon us, but I 
 would not hear of so much as a biscuit being added 
 to the liberal entertainment, having adopted the 
 opinion of an old gentleman, who remarked, that 
 supper is " an insult to dinner, and an injury to 
 breakfast." 
 
 The landlady presented me next morning with 
 a beautiful bouquet, containing all the best flowers 
 in her garden, and though none were exotics, the 
 good old native wall-flowers and thyme, with their 
 
CRAIGIEVAR. 279 
 
 fragrant perfume, come back like the familiar friends 
 of by-gone days, and revive many "thoughts too 
 deep for tears." Who does not remember the period 
 when one little enclosure, frilled round with box- 
 wood and flaunting with sun-flowers and daffodils, 
 gave him more real joy than the gardens at Kew 
 could do now if he had them ? and as the simpler 
 we can keep our tastes, the more easy they are of 
 indulgence, I would not exchange my partiality to 
 honeysuckles, violets, and roses, for all the scent- 
 less rarities that ever adorned a green-house, direct- 
 ing their attractions to the eye and not to the heart. 
 It was in honour of our good old landlady, Mrs. 
 Gordon, that these very beautiful lines were penned, 
 containing an eloquent and deserved panegyric, writ- 
 ten with so much taste and feeling, that we have 
 scarcely yet decided whether the style resembles 
 most that of Moore or Mrs. Hemans, 
 
 . Of all the hostleries so fair, 
 Built for the traveller's dwelling, 
 On Dee-side, far beyond compare, 
 
 ' Kincardine is excelling. 
 
LOCH-NA-GAR 
 
 Years have roU'd on, Loch-na-gar, since I left you ! 
 
 Years must elapse ere I tread you again, 
 Nature of verdure and flow'rs has bereft you, 
 
 Yet still are you dearer than Albion's plain. 
 
 England ! thy beauties are tame and domestic, 
 To one who has rov'd on the mountains afar ! 
 
 Oh ! for the crags that are wild and majestic, 
 The steep frowning glories of dark Loch-na-gar. 
 
 Byron. 
 
 My dear Cousin, — Here we are, in the scene of 
 Lord Byron's early days, where, before " splendour 
 had raised, but embittered his lot," he joyously ran 
 over the lofty hills, without his hat, and where, 
 again to use his own expression, he " clasp'd the 
 mountain in his mind's embrace," a stretch of imag- 
 ination certainly ! Near the snow-covered summit 
 of Morven, he imbibed a taste for those cloud-capped 
 mountains, thundering torrents, and pathless forests, 
 which owe their subsequent celebrity to his pen, 
 and you could not wonder here that Byron became 
 a poet, but would be apt rather to wonder that 
 every one is not. 
 
 We drove to-day through moors purple with 
 heather, and sprinkled with birch, the pyramids of 
 
LOCH-NA-GAR. 281 
 
 hills growing bolder as we advanced, and the beau- 
 tiful Dee dancing beside us most of the time, while 
 a magnificent confusion of mountains hemmed us in 
 on every side, rock above rock, and one precipice 
 looking over the head of another, in endless succes- 
 sion, some as bare as a turnpike road, and others 
 crowded with trees to their highest pinnacles. 
 Here we gained a momentary glimpse of Aboyne 
 Castle, covered with a sheet of white-wash, a fine 
 feudal-looking edifice, embosomed in fir-trees, and 
 rather shy of showing itself. 
 
 The inn at Ballater is charmingly situated at 
 one end of a bridge, with the swiftly flowing river 
 rushing along at the extremity of a neat little 
 flower garden. This was quite a place to spend 
 the summer at, instead of merely changing horses 
 as we did. Here the sole, engrossing business of 
 every body's life seemed to be trout-fishing, and I 
 pity every gentleman not fond of that fascinating 
 sport, which becomes often an inexhaustible re- 
 source to the half-pay world, many of whom occupy 
 their whole mornings in angling, and their evenings 
 in dressing hooks. I like to see a hat like some 
 we passed to-day, stuck over, inside and out, with 
 flies, as if a bee-hive had swarmed on it. Many 
 ladies in the Highlands wield the rod, though rather 
 perhaps out of their element on such an occasion. 
 I was amused to hear of a chieftain, accustomed 
 24* 
 
282 LOCH-NA-GAK. 
 
 only to angling, who arrived in a hunting country, 
 where a kind neighbour, finding he had never before 
 seen this sort of sport, gave him a mount on a 
 spirited steed, which, of course, ran off with him, 
 but as he flew past his friend at full career, vainly 
 trying to hold in the reins, he was heard to exclaim, 
 with a true Highland drawl, " I like fishing much 
 better !" 
 
 I receive daily lessons against indulging an ex- 
 cessive partiality to open carriages, but it seems 
 quite incurable. We discovered a most enticing 
 little britchska to be hired at Ballator, and, con- 
 gratulating myself on such a piece of good fortune, 
 I took possession, and proceeded the first three 
 miles of our beautiful journey in the most unalloyed 
 state of enjoyment, but gradually the mist hung in 
 festoons almost down to the road, and at last came 
 such a burst of rain that travellers must have been 
 drenched before they could raise an umbrella. In 
 this bold, romantic scene, it became most tantalizing 
 not to know a cloud from a hill, but they must, in- 
 deed, at all times be near neighbours on very inti- 
 mate terms. 
 
 Besides the gray precipices, hoarse waterfalls, 
 towering hills, and inconceivable profusion of birch 
 and fir trees, this noble scene displays another beauty 
 which you would scarcely anticipate, being quite 
 the kingdom of wild roses. We saw thousands by 
 
LOCH-NA-GAR. * 283 
 
 the road side, — a perfect army of red and white 
 roses drawn up in battle array, and scattered all 
 around in dazzling abundance. You perhaps fancy 
 I mean mere hedges, but there were wild unculti- 
 vated fields of them, giving so flushed and full- 
 dressed an aspect to the landscape, that the road 
 seemed ornamented for a gala, and several branches 
 had straggled so far across our path that I could 
 almost have plucked them as we drove along. If 
 you wish to know^ how a dress of green velvet and 
 roses would look, nature certainly wears one here. 
 As Bishop Home remarked of a Christian's afflic- 
 tions, " every thorn is accompanied by a flower !" 
 Sometimes while contrasting the simple delight of 
 living in a scene like this with the artificial enjoy- 
 ments of a town career, I have thought the differ- 
 ence might be aptly illustrated by comparing the 
 feelings of a wearied, haggard, and w^orn-out vota- 
 ry of dissipation, wdth faded looks and exhausted 
 spirits, hurrying home from a ball-room at the 
 dawn of day, and meeting the joyous school-boys 
 and market girls, fresh from their country homes, 
 with buoyant spirits and unimpaired health, untar- 
 nished by the heat, glare, and dust which have ac- 
 companied unnatural excitement. It is astonishing 
 how many prefer gas light to sunshine itself, which, 
 like the light of religion, cheers every moment of 
 joy, interfering with no pleasure that deserves the 
 
284 ABERGELCrE CASTLE. 
 
 name, and least of all with our interest and delight 
 in contemplating the works of creation and Provi- 
 dence. 
 
 Abergeldie Castle, which we passed, is a tall 
 white house, like a spectre among the dark moun- 
 tains, quite romantically beautiful in situation, and 
 properly furnished with bartizans and turrets com- 
 plete. Burns wrote a song on the " birks of Aber- 
 feldie," but the great original bitches were those of 
 this place, which we now admired, and the more 
 ancient ballad begins with an invitation which I 
 would recommend every one to accept who admires 
 a fascinating country, — 
 
 Bonny lassie, will ye go 
 To the birks o' Abergeldie"? 
 
 The river Dee flows, broad, deep, and silent, be- 
 neath the walls of this old building, and the inhabi- 
 tants being obliged to make a circuit of some miles 
 for a bridge, have suspended a cradle here, from 
 tree to tree, across the rapid stream, in which en- 
 terprising travellers may venture a flight on a slack 
 rope in the same way as at Noss Head. Here the 
 foundation is more secure than that of Shetland, 
 where, in default of trees, large poles are merely 
 stuck in the ground, but, nevertheless, I was truly 
 glad not to be going in that direction, because, after 
 engaging to use whatever conveyances the country 
 
BALMORRAL. 285 
 
 afforded, I should have been bound in honour to 
 suspend myself here. The last accident which oc- 
 curred on the swing-bridge was when a gamekeeper 
 and dogs were emptied into the water, and had to 
 swim for their lives ; but a more tragical catastrophe 
 took place several years ago. An excise officer 
 having fallen in, crowds assembled, eager to rescue 
 a fellow-creature in distress, but when the sufferer 
 was unluckily recognised, they left him to his fate, 
 exclaiming, "It's only the guager !" If a High- 
 land jury had been summoned to the inquest, they 
 would have been apt to return a verdict like that 
 given lately on the trial of a man for violently beat- 
 ing his wife. When the jury re-entered, after long 
 deliberation, and the judge solemnly asked for their 
 decision, it was unanimously delivered in these words, 
 " Sarved her right !" 
 
 A bride and bridegroom once, when attempting 
 to cross by this fantastic contrivance, on the day of 
 their marriage, were precipitated into the rolling 
 current, and perished. Such melancholy and unex- 
 pected catastrophes bring to my mind sometimes the 
 homely remark of a rural preacher, " Death is like 
 a cow in a daisy-field, cropping here, and there, and 
 everywhere, by turns !" 
 
 We next observed Balmorral, a beautiful place 
 of Lord Fife's, who seems fortunate in a tenant, as 
 we were told that it has been long occupied for 
 
286 INVEKCAULD. 
 
 shooting quartei's by a sportsman, who adds a new 
 wang or tower to the house ahnost every year, and 
 gathers a perfect battu of excellent shots round 
 the neighbourhood. K it be any consolation to die 
 by noble hands, the whole House of Lords seemed 
 in full progress here for the ensuing campaign, 
 when the country will be fragrant with gunpowder, 
 and resounding with shots. We saw one noble red- 
 deer standing by the road side, and staring at us 
 while we passed, as if he meant to " take down our 
 number." He seemed to have no idea of making 
 way for intruders in his native forests, and I am told 
 these animals scarcely notice a carriage at any time, 
 therefore the best way to shoot them would be to go 
 out in one. 
 
 The next place on our muster-roll of houses was 
 Invercauld, which has for many centuries belonged 
 to the ancestors of Mrs. Farquharson, the present 
 chieftainess of that clan. Here magnificent forests 
 clamber up the mountain sides, and stately old trees 
 enrich the valley, which, surrounded by a ring of 
 lofty pinnacles, can be compared to nothing but 
 Sinbad's valley of diamonds, to which birds alone 
 could find access. You would be quite perplexed 
 to imagine how a carriage ever wound its way into 
 this beautiful park, or is ever to get out again. 
 Loch-na-gar rushes up with a fine sweep towards 
 the sky, where it indents the very firmament above. 
 
INVERCAULD. 287 
 
 The Lion's face is a noble craggy precipice, and 
 another mountain opposite the house of Invercauld, 
 displays flowers at the base and snow on the sum- 
 mit. 
 
 You can dream of nothing comparable to the 
 effect by moonlight on Ben-y-bourd and Loch-na- 
 gar, looking blacker than night, as if carved in ebony 
 or jet, varied by solemn forests of fir, and the dark 
 foaming current of the Dee. It was in this romantic 
 district that a native, brought from the featureless 
 flats of Buchan, was asked what he thought of the 
 scenery, when he remarked in a tone of diverting 
 perplexity, " Oh ! it's very fine scainery, — ^but its 
 a' scainery together ! nothing but scainery ! — feint 
 a flea but scainery ! !" 
 
 We enjoyed a charming drive next morning, 
 with Mrs. Farquharson, through several miles of 
 natural forest, in which every thing appeared wild 
 and uncultivated, as if not a human being had ever 
 interfered with the course of nature. Aged fir trees 
 bristled against the sky, their furrowed gray stems 
 looking as old as the mountains they covered, while 
 clustered together for miles, their strange fantastic 
 arms were thrown out in every curious contortion 
 that can be imagined, beneath which, the whole 
 ground was embroidered with a wild profusion of 
 heather, cranberries, thyme, roses, myrtle, fox-glove, 
 and the old original blue bells of Scotland. Who 
 
288 INVERCAULD. 
 
 could attempt to describe such a scene ! it is impos- 
 sible ! the gigantic outline, and the minute finish- 
 ing, — the hills of a thousand years, and the blossoms 
 of an hour ! all that is majestic, and all that is lovely 
 in nature, glowing beneath a flood of sunshine, and 
 filling the heart with enraptured gratitude towards 
 that Great Being, who, in embellishing our world 
 with beauty, has given us one earthly pleasure, in 
 which there is no sinful excess, no disappointment, 
 and almost a foretaste of that felicity which we look 
 for in a still brighter and better world. 
 
 The road, gently undulating up and down the 
 mountain side, might have been supposed merely a 
 track formed by accident, but in other places it 
 whirled round the hills like a corkscrew. We drove 
 in a light open carriage, drawn by spirited young 
 horses, which, in any other circumstances, would 
 have engrossed my most anxious attention, but such 
 was the elevating effect of this sublime scene, that 
 I actually forgot to be frightened ! The proud 
 Lord Abercorn, used to drive his thorough-bred 
 horses over hill and dale, with no other reins than 
 blue ribbons, the trappings he delighted in for him- 
 self, but having tried the experiment once too often, 
 they ran off, when he leaped out and broke both 
 his legs. 
 
 These roads through the tangled forests were 
 made by a regiment formerly quartered in the old 
 
INA^ERCAULD. 289 
 
 Castle of Braemar, a square tower ornamenting the 
 park of Invercauld, which once belonged to the 
 Earls of Mar. Colonel Farquharson, seeing those 
 soldiers falUng into idle habits, like a second Mar- 
 shal Wade, employed them in cutting and carving 
 their way over the mountains, to so great an extent , 
 that it would occupy many days now, to drive over 
 all the highways and by\\^ays they formed. One 
 very rare species of tree was pointed out during our 
 drive, " The gallows tree," on which the chief of the 
 clan Farquharson, without thinking it necessary to 
 consult any jury, exercised the privilege of suspend- 
 ing his retainers when disobedient. We abandoned 
 tlie carriage at one impossible ascent, and scrambled 
 up to admire the stream of the Garrawalt, faUing n 
 a loud, roaring cascade, which foamed and tumbled 
 impetuously onwards. It was surmounted by a 
 singularly elegant rustic bridge of rough stakes, so 
 very light and insecure looking, that some visitei-s 
 race across on tiptoe, expecting it to snap in two. 
 The distant effect is charming. 
 
 In a tasteful and elegant moss-house, where we 
 sat down to relieve our feelings by a cannonade of 
 exclamations, while admiring the tormented river 
 tumbling passionately about on its rocky bed, and 
 then passing away, like the course of time, our at- 
 tention was called off by observing that the whole 
 roof and sides of this retreat had been grotesquely 
 25 
 
290 MAR LODGE. 
 
 disfigured by a party of strangers from Aberdeen, 
 who arrived there in the morning, and who had 
 most ungraciously occupied their time in spoihng 
 this romantic seat, by strongly fastening up with 
 wires tickets exhibiting their own insignificant 
 names, which had probably never appeared else- 
 where, except on a shop-board. 
 
 To-day I got my first glimpse of Mar Lodge. 
 Its best friends cannot call the house a beauty, being 
 rather of the cotton-mill school, but as Cinderella's 
 sisters observed of their ugly dresses, " to make up 
 for that," all around is magnificent. The situation 
 is not only superb for natural beauty, but also for 
 affording every variety of sport. The newspapers 
 resound each successive season with a list of killed 
 and wounded at Mar Lodge. Among grouse, red- 
 deer, trout, salmon, and every living creature that 
 has the misfortune to be called game, or that it is 
 any pleasure to kill, I suppose more deaths take 
 place here annually, than in any other corner of the 
 known world. Even the trees at Mar Lodge are 
 slaughtered on a great scale ! The better half of 
 this venerable forest, once the ornament of Scotland, 
 now lies prostrate in the dust. The saw-mill has 
 done its work, and a few hundreds only remain to 
 tell of the thousands that are no more. 
 
 As a colony of trouts in the Bruar once employed 
 Burns to write a poetical complaint of wanting 
 
LYNN OF DEE. 291 
 
 shade, the fish in the Dee should engage Campbell 
 or Wilson, the only living poets of Scotland now, 
 to assist them with a few verses. It is curious to 
 observe how very much poetry has gone out ; and 
 we shall soon have nothing left but the embers, 
 unless a little fresh fuel be put to the imaginations 
 of the rising generation. 
 
 At the celebrated Lynn of Dee, this capricious, 
 frolicsome stream is imprisoned within a contracted 
 chasm of rock, and rushes out like splintered light- 
 ning, dashing with an impetuous violence, the thun- 
 dering sound of which can be heard neai'ly a«mile 
 off. This need scarcely be wondered at, when we 
 see a broad river decanted through a narrow neck 
 of solid stone, which so nearly meets over the top, 
 that many fool-hardy people have leaped across. 
 When driving towards the Lynn, I had observed, 
 for about two miles, a ragged boy racing at full 
 speed after the carriage; and at this moment he 
 hastily descended towards the gorge, with an evi- 
 dent intention to exhibit before us, by taking this 
 desperate leap. We most peremptorily summoned 
 the little urchin back, at which he seemed consider- 
 ably astonished, having been accustomed to receive 
 a premium, rather than a reprimand, from tourists, 
 for risking life and limb, to afford them diversion, 
 but I would have given him double price to be sta- 
 tionary. 
 
292 LYNN OF DEE. 
 
 The first chief of the clan Farquharson was 
 drowned here ; and no one seeing the frightful pool, 
 supposed by the country people to be bottomless, 
 could fancy that a bone of his body remained un- 
 broken. A poor man last month, who succeeded in 
 springing over, missed his aim in attempting to 
 return, and fell back into the foaming caldron ! 
 Now, what do you think was the consequence 7 
 '•' Drowned of course !" No ! by a sort of miracle, 
 he was washed on to a rock perfectly unhurt, and 
 lives to tell the tale himself. 
 
 ^ast, not least, Lord Byron very nearly died 
 here in a manner worthy of his poetical taste. 
 Some heather having tripped up his lame foot, he 
 rolled helplessly down towards the precipice, but on 
 the very brink of destruction, he was preserved by 
 an attendant, who with difficulty saved his life — 
 that life, a scene of so much fiery passion and intense 
 agony, that he could scarcely afterwards rejoice at 
 its having been prolonged. The world's loud 
 plaudits could not drown the still small voice of an 
 inward monitor, the witness for God in every mortal 
 mind, reminding us that nothing on this earth can 
 suffice for happiness ; and the more intellect or sen- 
 sibility frail man may be gifted with, the more 
 empty, vain, and disappointing to his never-dying 
 spirit will appear the vanishing pleasures of time. 
 That the solemn and unspeakable importance of 
 
LYNN OF DEE. 293 
 
 Christianity was at one period impressed on the 
 mind of Lord Byron himself, may be hoped, from 
 reading the well-known lines inscribed on his own 
 Bible : 
 
 Withia this awful volume lies 
 The mystery of mysteries. 
 Happiest they of human race, 
 To whom their God has given grace, 
 To read, to fear, to hope, to pray, 
 To lift the latch, to force the way ; 
 And better had they ne'er been born, 
 Than read to doubt — or read to scorn. 
 
 25* 
 
BLAIRGOWRIE 
 
 Panting time toils after us in vain. 
 
 JOHNSOK. 
 
 My dear Cousin, — Wherever travellers are 
 going, if there be a particularly bad road, narrow 
 and hilly, without parapets, bridges, or inns, you 
 may feel certain that for some insuperable reason, 
 they ought to prefer it, and accordingly, though we 
 were recommended for comfort to proceed from 
 Invercauld by the Blairgowrie road, I exceedingly 
 washed to have gone up Glen Tilt, that we might 
 see how dreary and wild the world would have 
 been without inhabitants. There the long desolate 
 ridges of Scarsochare 35000 feet high, the hill of 
 Ben-na-muich-duidh has a name all but unpro- 
 nounceable, and the forest of Dalmore is noted as 
 producing the finest natural pine trees in Europe, 
 both in respect to their size, and the quality of the 
 timber. Some of these trees measure from eighty to" 
 ninety feet in height, without a lateral branch, their 
 diameter at the base being four feet and a half, but 
 in spite of all these attractions, and fifty more be- 
 sides, we submitted to advice, and plodded on 
 towards Blairgowrie. 
 
CRAIGHALL, 295 
 
 My miseries began with a ford across the Dee, 
 which had been for several days before impassable, 
 but the post-boy from Castleton of Braemar pro- 
 tested we might venture through, so I closed my 
 eyes to avoid being frightened, and could not but 
 remember at that moment, the not very consoling 
 advice of a servant once in similar circumstances, to 
 his master, " If it comes to the worst. Sir ! hold 
 down your head, and drown as fast as possible !" 
 
 There was once upon a time a public-spirited 
 Lord Breadalbane, who erected thirty-two stone 
 bridges, and if any one ever proposes a monument 
 to his memory, my subscription, after this day's ex- 
 perience, shall be doubled. Bridges are certainly 
 most convenient things, but those along this road 
 are so singularly narrow, that you might fancy the 
 carriage wheels had been exactly measured, so as to 
 graze the parapet on both sides. I must attend, 
 however, to the grateful old proverb, " Let every 
 one praise the bridge he goes over." 
 
 The Spittal of Glen Shea, — or rather the Hos- 
 pital, as it used to be called, was our first stage, and 
 after having driven through a wild looking desert, 
 we here found a green expanse of excellent pasture, 
 with something that called itself an inn, where a 
 covey of Irish sportsmen armually assemble for the 
 shooting season, and occupy the best rooms. It is 
 surprising that gentlemen do not oftener pitch a 
 
296 BLAIRGOWRIE. 
 
 tent upon the moors, which would be attended with 
 the most romantic degree of discomfort. A party 
 came to Scotland some years ago in this Arab fash- 
 ion, and they brought, moreover, a long narrow 
 carriage, which could be metamorphosed occasion- 
 ally into a boat. Thus they lived, according to the 
 beau-ideal of Lord Byron, " My tent on shore, my 
 galley on the sea." 
 
 Craighall showed itself for a few moments as 
 we passed, a romantic old castle, which had once 
 the honour of being besieged by an Earl of Athol, 
 who had married a daughter of the Rattray family, 
 and intended, by killing all the male representatives 
 of that house, to bring in his wife as the heiress, but 
 he had no more success than he deserved, as the 
 gentlemen proved " too many for him." 
 
 After pausing at the gay pretty town of Blair- 
 gowrie, we skirted along a complete chain of small 
 lakes — or lakelets — not very illustrious for beauty. 
 In the loch of Clunie, almost rising out of the 
 water, stands an old castle, scarcely deserving a 
 second glance, till you hear that it claims the hon- 
 our to have been the birth-place of the Admirable 
 Crichton, the wonder of his age, and of every sub- 
 sequent age besides. I sometimes wish a scale 
 could be invented for measuring the extent and 
 depth of men's attainments — not as they seem to 
 others, or are estimated by themselves, but according 
 
DUNKELD CATHEDRAL. 297 
 
 to the real weight of metal they carry. How grand 
 and unexpected the sum total would appear m some 
 cases, and how marvellously others, who fill up a 
 large space in the public eye, would shrink to an 
 atom ; but such a genius as the Admirable Crichton, 
 would then, perhaps, be found to outweigh a whole 
 college. 
 
 We drove at length through the lofty barriers 
 of the King's Pass, which forms a grand entrance to 
 Dunkeld, and arrived to dinner at Grant's very 
 beautifully situated inn, near one end of the bridge, 
 where the broad, deep, majestic Tay floats beneath 
 the windows, clear as the glass through which we 
 were gazing at it. I cannot but wonder that any 
 traveller can ever tear himself away from this en- 
 chanting neighbourhood in less than a month, he 
 must find so much to enjoy in strolling through the 
 Duke's magnificent grounds, where the thing per- 
 haps most to be admired of all, is the liberality with 
 which they are thrown open, so that any tourist 
 may feel here, as if he had suddenly succeeded to a 
 large estate of his own, and were come to enjoy it. 
 
 The old Cathedral of Dunkeld, founded by Rob-, 
 ert Bruce's protege Bishop Sinclair, five hundred 
 years ago, stands within the grounds, and is consid- 
 ered quite an architectural gem, being a curious 
 omnium gather' em of various styles, forming a beau- 
 tiful whole, though sketchers and engravers have 
 
298 DUNKELD CATHEDRAL. 
 
 made sad havoc of its graceful Saxon and Norman 
 arches. Most of the building is a mere shell, but 
 we attended Divine service in the choir, which is 
 yet in its premier jetmesse, on Sunday, and observed 
 a handsome marble tablet, raised by the congrega- 
 tion in testimony of heartfelt and unanimous regret 
 for the death of their pious and beloved clergyman, 
 Mr. Robb, drowned on board the Forfarshire steam- 
 vessel, some months ago. In reading their expres- 
 sions of deep lamentation, I could not but remember 
 that this excellent man, when presented to the 
 Church two years ago, encountered a universal veto, 
 and the very doors were barricadoed against him, 
 by the identical persons now so entirely conciliated 
 by his extraordinary zeal and ability. The patron 
 has since presented this living to Mr. Mackenzie, 
 who at once rendered himself acceptable to the 
 whole parish, and it is confidently anticipated, that 
 patronage will again be honoured in its protege. 
 
 None of the parishioners attempted a veto on 
 this occasion, with or without rendering a reason, 
 and I hope it may be long before here or elsewhere, 
 it shall become a sufficient cause for rejecting a 
 clergyman, to repeat those well-known lines, which 
 used, at one time, to be reckoned rather ridiculous j 
 
 I do not like thee, Dr. Fell, 
 The reason why 1 cannot tell ; 
 But I do not like thee, Dr. Fell. 
 
DUNKELD. 299 
 
 A very fine statue, representing the late Duke 
 of Atholl, stands in the chancel of this cathedral, 
 dressed in his robes of state, and extremely like, 
 though merely copied from a small portrait of Land- 
 seer's, by an artist who never saw his Grace. Close 
 beside it, we perceived a very handsome monument 
 to the Marquis of Atholl, emblazoned with the quar- 
 terings of his many great connections, and few fam- 
 ilies ever had more to boast of, as they were once 
 related to every crowned head in Europe, except 
 the Grand Signior. 
 
 The climate here must be tolerably healthy, as 
 there used to be at Dunkeld " an eighty-four club," 
 no member being eligible till he attained that age. 
 The late Duke used to say, that when young he 
 made walks, and when old he made rides over the 
 hills of Dunkeld, and both have now been most 
 effectually done, as the greatest pedestrian might 
 fatigue himself here, perambulating over the eighty 
 miles of gravel walks and drives ! It must require 
 a Bank of England revenue to keep the place in 
 such admirable order ! I scarcely knew how to 
 stop my peregrinations, for every turn of the way 
 disclosed some new and incomparable beauty in the 
 landscape. My feeling was like yours when inter- 
 ested in some very engrossing novel, every page 
 rendering it more impossible to leave off. Mile 
 after mile leads you on to more fascinating scenes, 
 
300 DUNKELD. 
 
 and every step discovers something not anticipated 
 before. In one day the wearied guide led us, at a 
 sort of race-horse pace, to Ossian's Hall, and we 
 climbed successively to the summit of Craig Vinian 
 and Craigybarns, yet I felt as if we had done 
 nothing ! Like Lord Chatham, we " trampled on 
 impossibilities," and after walking sixteen miles up 
 and down hill, I could have begun it all over again 
 with pleasure, if the daylight had only been pro- 
 longed. 
 
 The grounds of Dunkeld are supposed to exhibit 
 nearly the most beautiful specimen of landscape gar- 
 dening in Europe, being as well wooded and highly 
 dressed as any in England, with the advantage of a 
 broad rapid torrent like the Tay glittering among 
 the forests, and the towering rocks and mountains 
 adding grandeur and dignity to their singular beauty. 
 A curious contrast may be remarked between the 
 wild untameable magnificence of His Grace's more 
 Highland residence at Blair, and the rich verdant 
 fertility of Dunkeld. No expense was spared to 
 embellish both ; and as long as we have national 
 vanity or national taste, all Scotland must gratefully 
 remember, that those scenes were adorned, not for 
 himself alone, but for the use and enjoyment of all 
 who possessed eyes to admire them. Many a de- 
 lightful hour has been spent in the groves and gar- 
 dens of Dunkeld, by strangers of all classes, and 
 
DUNKELD. 301 
 
 of all nations, welcomed as if they had been the 
 Duke's own relatives ; and it is, indeed, a privilege 
 to ramble at large among the secluded walks, the 
 gigantic trees, the flowers, the arbours, the river's 
 banks, and though last, not least, the hills covered 
 to their summits with larch. That was well known 
 to be the Duke's favourite tree, of which he planted 
 twenty thousand acres ; and a Perthshire gentleman 
 once remarked, that though the county could not 
 boast of an Arch-Duke, they had at any rate a Larch- 
 Duke. When Wilkes came to this neighbourhood 
 he protested that " the greatest vagary of Shak- 
 speare's fancy was, to imagine a wood on Birnham 
 Hill, where there never was a shrub." Certainly 
 when the trees marched to Dunsinane they were 
 very long of returning, as that mountain used to 
 stand conspicuously bare among its wooded neigh- 
 bours, like a great hay-stack in a garden, but the 
 taste of the late Sir John Stewart of Murthly has 
 enriched the scene by covering it with thriving 
 plantations. 
 
 Last time we were here, A had the amuse- 
 ment of lionizing the present Duke of Orleans all 
 over these grounds, after which we dined in his 
 company with the Duke of Atholl, who made a 
 speech to his royal guest, saying he had formerly 
 raised five hundred men to make war on foreign 
 enemies, but he was now employing an equal num- 
 26 
 
302 DUNKELD. 
 
 ber in preparing a residence, where, if he did not 
 live to practise hospitality himself, he trusted it 
 would be done by those who came after him. He 
 finished by proposing the health and prosperity of 
 Charles the Tenth, who had visited him at Blair 
 during banishment from France, when the last 
 words he said to the royal prince at taking leave 
 were, " The kindest wish I can offer your Highness 
 is, that I may never see you here again." 
 
 The employment afforded to his tenantry by the 
 Duke of Atholl, became a source of so much opu- 
 lence and comfort to all around him, that his death 
 was felt as a family misfortune in every cottage on 
 his wide domains. Five hundred men were em- 
 ployed till the hour of his decease, in building that 
 palace of almost royal splendour, which will prob- 
 ably never now be finished. When the news 
 arrived of his Grace's demise, a mournful dispersion 
 of the work people instantly took place, and from 
 that hour not a stroke has been heard among the 
 deserted walls. A more strange and melancholy 
 spectacle than it now presents, you can scarcely 
 imagine. It is not a ruin ! it is not a house ! all 
 seems fresh, new, and magnificent, yet in the sur- 
 rounding desolation, you feel conscious that some 
 great calamity has occurred, and speak almost in 
 whispers, while pointing to the splendid arches, 
 windows, and doors, some of which have been tern- 
 
DUNKELD. 303 
 
 poraiily closed In for protection, — the half-chiselled 
 stones, the bare red bricks, and the workmen's sheds 
 surrounded by long grass and weeds, which grow 
 all untrodden in the deep solitude and silence of this 
 death-like scene. 
 
 The Duke, during his life, caused a small glass 
 pavilion, like a lantern, to be erected near the new 
 palace, in which he sat for hours every day, watch- 
 ing the growth of this noble pile ; and having 
 taken an English stranger once there, he laughed 
 at his guest's long reach of imagination, who ex- 
 claimed, on beholding what looked Idee the founda- 
 tions of a city, " This will be a noble ruin hereafter!" 
 Little did his Grace or the admiring visiter then 
 foresee how nearly that hour was at hand, when the 
 rain and the wind would beat unheeded through 
 these roofless untenanted apartments ! A few short 
 months would have completed this promising young 
 palace, now so prematurely cut off. Two floors are 
 nearly finished, as well as a gallery ninety-six feet 
 long, besides an elegant private chapel, a spacious 
 staircase, and several noble gothic windows, which 
 were to have been emblazoned with all the family 
 shields and quarterings, carved in stone. 
 
 We were shown a miniature model which cost 
 <£500, of the whole edifice. Will any future Ala- 
 din arise to accomplish the whole of this superb plan ? 
 If so, the power of stone and lime could no further go ! 
 
304 DUNKELD. 
 
 We traced real genius in the bold variety, as well 
 as in the graceful arrangement of the whole out- 
 line, and I must say, that the architect, Mr. Hopper, 
 may go proudly down to posterity, carrying, as evi- 
 dences of his taste, Penorhn Castle in one hand, and 
 Dunkeld Palace in the other ! What profession in 
 the world can compare to that of an architect for 
 leaving permanent memorials behind ! Sir Chris- 
 topher Wren will need no monument as long as St 
 Paul's keeps its place ; a marble tablet could adc! 
 little to the celebrity of Inigo Jones ; and who can 
 ever forget Sir William Adams, while the barracks 
 on Edinburgh Castle continue to be frightful ? 
 
 It is a singular coincidence in this neighbourhood, 
 that the twin-houses of Murthly and Dunkeld, which 
 were in progress at the same time, have both lost 
 their founders, and remained ever since desolate and 
 forlorn, though Murthly, with its towers crowned by 
 glittering weather-co cks, and its temporary windows 
 of painted wood, puts a much more cheerful face 
 upon the matter than this extensive young ruin. We 
 daily experienced how wise and merciful an appoint- 
 ment it is, that no one can tell the year or the hour 
 when his labours on earth shall for ever cease. All 
 exertion would-at once be paralyzed in such a case, 
 and it requires energy of mind certainly in those who 
 cannot reckon on a day, to begin what must occupy 
 years to complete. " Man proposes and God dis- 
 
KILLIECRANKIE. 305 
 
 poses ;" but we seem best to fulfil the intentions of 
 Providence, when each individual continues active 
 and diligent in his own vocation ; and few have left 
 greater memorials behind them than the late Duke 
 of Atholl, whose forests, bridges, roads, and houses, 
 while they ornamented his estate, spread industry 
 and cheerfulness, where formerly there had been 
 idleness and want, A great political economist has 
 discovered that the prosperity of a country depends 
 on every man exerting himself in the utmost degree 
 to promote his own interest, and while the Duke 
 metamorphosed his own barren heaths into fruitful 
 fields, he also changed an indolent peasantry into 
 active, diligent, and happy labourers. 
 
 The attachment his Grace inspired was such, 
 that the Highlanders would admit nothing that they 
 thought to his prejudice, and when a stranger for- 
 merly asked one of the Duke of AthoU's foresters, 
 if his master spoke Gaelic, the man, having recently 
 returned from attending his Grace in a shooting ex- 
 cursion to the hill of Keichnacaapex, confidently 
 replied, " Och, yes ! the Duke speaks Gaelic fine ! 
 'Twas only t'other day, when I was following him 
 to the hills, his Grace turned round to me, and 
 pointed with his finger, saying, ' Keichnacaapex, 
 Donald /' Och, yes ! he speaks Gaelic fine !" 
 
 The weather was as beautiful as the scenery, 
 when we drove next morning towards the noble 
 26* 
 
306 KILLIECRANKIE. 
 
 hills and castle of Blair-Athol, along miles of 
 aged ash trees, oaks, and beeches, admiring and 
 criticising a rapid succession of beautiful seats, and, 
 to sum up all, threading through the very essence 
 of Highland beaut}', the pass ofKilliecrankie, which 
 every individual should see, who has an eye in his 
 head. The landscape is so enchanting, I *could 
 scarcely believe my eyes when I looked at it. How 
 many of our countrymen once expired on this battle- 
 field ! and it might almost add a pang to death itself, 
 when the eye gazed its last on scenes so bright and 
 attractive. The rapid Garry roaring fiercely along 
 its rocky bed, the cultivated fields, the wooded hills, 
 the towering mountains, the gay little gardens, and 
 the regiment of villas, are beautiful enough to make 
 one dream for a moment, in spite of precept and ex- 
 perience, that there might be such a thing on earth 
 as perfect happiness. In the most romantic part of 
 this magnificent glen stands an old gray stone, 
 raised in memory of " The bloody Claverhouse," as 
 one party name him, and " The bold Dundee," as 
 others insist he should be called, who died here, 
 like Nelson, in the moment of victory, both con- 
 quering and conquered. It was an amusing scene 
 which took place once, when a very aged Lady 
 Elphinstone being introduced to Claverhouse, he 
 politely remarked to her, " You must have seen many 
 interesting things in your day, Madam ?" To which 
 
LUDE. 307 
 
 she drily answered, " 'Deed no, Sir, except when I 
 was young, that we had one Knox deaving us wi' 
 his davers, and now w^e have a Clavers deavinsf us 
 wi' his knocks !" 
 
 In the most romantic part of our drive, we met 
 an elegant young lady, in a riding habit, hat and 
 green veil, mounted — no ! not on horseback, but on 
 the top of the mail ! clinging to the coach-box, and 
 gazing about, evidently in so fine a frenzy of delight 
 that, could poetry possibly be inspired on the top of 
 a coach, she had certainly found a rhyme, — at least 
 if there be one in the world, — for Killiecrankie. 
 
 Among the fine plantations at Lude, an elegant 
 new house is rapidly growing up a la Burn, which 
 promises to be a very successful hit. The spacious 
 windows command a superb view of the Garry for 
 several miles, and of many rugged hills, with totally 
 unspellable names. Here Mr. M'Inroy showed us 
 the finest bowling-green I ever beheld, on which the 
 lovers of bowls and other "gymnastic exercises" 
 may amuse themselves. Games out of doore seem 
 so wholesome and exhilirating, that the old grow 
 young, and the young forget to grow old when 
 practising them. Active habits prolong the enjoy- 
 ment of boyish spirits, long after a man of mere 
 clubs and newspapers has subsided into his fire-side 
 arm-chair, as a fixture for life, and every man who 
 wishes w^ell to himself, should cultivate a taste for 
 
308 LUDE. 
 
 whatever energetic amusement takes him off the 
 hearth-rug. A clergyman in the Highlands lately 
 objected so strongly to a cricket-ground being es- 
 tablished in his parish, that the party of gentlemen 
 who had begun the plan relinquished it, but if more 
 innocent recreatious were encouraged for all classes 
 in Scotland, there would probably be fewer vices. 
 It is amazing how creditably some persons get 
 through their lives, without exertion of any kind, 
 by rising late, dozing in the evening, and lounging 
 all day, actually doing nothing ; but the very es- 
 sence of health and usefulness is found in the activity 
 M'ith which we devote a due portion of time to all 
 things that can lawfully occupy it, not allowing re- 
 laxation to interfere with business, and least of all 
 with religion, but making it consistent with the rest 
 which our minds require for entering on the duties 
 of both. 
 
 The late proprietor of Lude, General Robertson, 
 who waged incessant legal warfare against the late 
 Duke of Atholl, was particularly annoyed at his 
 Grace for claiming a right to hunt deer over all this 
 estate. When Prince Leopold visited at the Castle 
 of Blair, the Duke gave his vassal warning that he 
 intended next day to exercise his privilege for the 
 entertainment of his royal guest. Accordingly the 
 deer were driven down, and every thing promised a 
 delightful day's sport, when, under pretence of doing 
 
CASTLE BLAIR. 309 
 
 all honour to the illustrious stranger, the General 
 fired off a grand salute, which scattered the herd to 
 the farthest limit of the forest. 
 
 The massive old Castle of Blair, the ancient 
 fortalice of the Earldom of Atholl, has seen its best 
 days, having been dismantled in 1745 by order of 
 government, when the towers, pinnacles, and battle- 
 ments were thrown down, and the elevation, which 
 was seven stories high, became lowered to four, 
 having been literally beheaded. Such was the 
 thickness of these venerable walls, and the adhesive- 
 ness of the cement, that this barbarous act could only 
 be perpetrated by successive explosions of gunpow- 
 der, but every thing that makes a castle ornamental 
 was perseveringly destroyed. The first sensation of 
 tourists on beholding this once pre-eminent building, 
 must now be disappointment, but within, sufficient ac- 
 commodation remains for the exercise of princely hos- 
 pitality, and one of the apartments is embellished by 
 a peculiarly handsome ornamented ceiling. 
 
 In "the '15," the only date remembered here 
 except the " '45," the Duke of Atholl took the safe 
 side, while his heir apparent, the Marquis of Tulli- 
 bardine, zealously engaged himself with the opposite 
 party, and joined the Earl of Mar. Having been 
 attainted, he took refuge in France, and his politic 
 father got an act of parliament to disinherit him, 
 securinir the estate and title to the next brother. 
 
310 CASTLE BLAIR. 
 
 The Marquis, now rendered desperate, became so 
 eager in the cause, that four years afterwards he 
 joined the Spanish inrasion, when, being defeated 
 at Glensheil, a high price was offered for his head, 
 but he escaped. A third time, in '45, he joined in 
 that attempt which ended so calamitously for him, 
 but so happily for us protestants, long life to us ! 
 The Marquis made his escape from CuUoden, but 
 his horse failing, he surrendered in broken health 
 and spirits, was imprisoned in the Tower during 
 the rest of his unlucky days, and died in less than a 
 month. Who does not feel for so spirited and heroic 
 a nobleman, who, from a mistaken sense of duty, 
 forfeited his birthright as Duke of Atholl in Scot- 
 land, Sovereign Lord of Man, and Lord Strange in 
 England ! When the Castle of Blair became, during 
 his life, the property of his junior brother the Duke, 
 it was attacked by a still younger brother. Lord 
 George Murray, but withstood the siege successfully. 
 The fortifications were again proved invulnerable 
 during the celebrated defence of them, made with a 
 mere handful of men, by Sir Andrew Agnew ; but 
 it was at last finally, as we have seen, cashiered, 
 broke, disarmed, and dismissed His Majesty's ser- 
 vice. 
 
 The lucky Duke who had superseded his elder 
 brother, acquired also, in a somewhat questionable 
 way, the estate of his cousin Lord Nairn, who be- 
 
CASTLE BLAIR. 311 
 
 came ruined in the Stuart cause. A general under- 
 standing prevailed in those days, that when a for- 
 feited estate was put up to auction, a friend ought to 
 bid for the proprietor, and no rival should compete, 
 that it might thus be restored literally for an old 
 song. The Duke, as head of the family, stood osten- 
 sibly forward, got the property knocked down to 
 himself for a trifle, and having a good notion what 
 a bargain means, either made no previous agree- 
 ment with Lord Nairn, or did not find his cousin's 
 money forthcoming, so, one w^ay or other, Strath- 
 aird, near Perth, has remained stationary with the 
 Dukes of AthoU ever since, and is hkely to con- 
 tinue so. 
 
 Lord George Murray, whom I already men- 
 tioned, was forfeited for the Glensheil affair, but par- 
 doned, and afterwards perseveringly joined in the 
 attempt of '45, when he became Prince Charles's 
 Lieutenant-General. He was again attainted, but 
 dying before his brother the Duke, his son's claim, 
 as heir to the uncle, was ingeniously carried through 
 the House of Lords, by means of the great Lord 
 Mansfield ; and having married his uncle's only 
 daughter, "the Lady of Man and Baroness Strange," 
 their son became the late Duke, of honourable mem- 
 ory. You will think I have torn a leaf out of 
 Burke or Debrett this morning, but I do like to un- 
 ravel and wind up the long line of an ancient fam* 
 
312 CASTLE BLAIR. 
 
 ily, especially when standing on the spot which has 
 
 been commemorated by their deeds from age to age. 
 
 In case the Herald King at Arms should become 
 
 jealous of my poaching on his manor, I shall now 
 
 conclude, however by referring you to the History 
 
 of Scotland, where " for further particulars inquire 
 
 within." 
 
 The editor of a fashionable magazine having 
 
 said, when reviewing a lady's book lately, that he 
 could not help falhng asleep over it, was surprised 
 to receive, some days afterwards, an elegant night- 
 cap, with her best regards, and I might as well en- 
 close one to you now, in case of accidents, as this 
 last epistle is rather a heavy article, and may prove 
 equally somniferous. 
 
LOGIE RAIT. 
 
 I won't describe — description is my forte ; 
 
 But ev'ry fool describes in these bright days. Byron 
 
 My dear Cousin, — This letter is begun inside the 
 trunk of an ash tree at Logic Rait, measuring fifty- 
 three feet in circumference, and here I should like 
 to imprison for life all travellers who deny that 
 Scotland can produce fine timber. Another of 
 nearly equal magnitude stands on the opposite side 
 of a broad river, and A is at this moment boat- 
 ing across to do homage at its shrine, while a dis- 
 tant glimpse quite satisfies my enthusiasm. I would 
 not wish to be censorious on other countries, or 
 very partial to my own, but the ash trees at Rich- 
 mond might be placed in a flower-pot beside these ! 
 
 The road from Blair in this direction, crossing at 
 the Bridge of Pitlochry, is as up and down, as narrow, 
 and as totally without parapets, as if we were travel- 
 ling round the rim of several great mill-wheels, but 
 we had a pair of worthy old Dobbins to draw us, and 
 it became well worth the fright to see so lovely a 
 country, though, if w^e had encountered cart or carri- 
 age, w^e should have been like the Highlanders meet- 
 ing on a plank, one or the other must have gone over. 
 
 I am weary of admiring! something superla- 
 tively ugly would be almost a relief to the eye, but 
 27 
 
314 LOGIE KAIT. 
 
 that is not to be had in Perthshire. Our post-boy 
 was remarkably attentive in pointing his whip to- 
 wards every object pecuharly deserving of notice, 
 and at one place I was about to extemporize a 
 very sentimental story for an exceedingly romantic 
 and really elegant villa to which he directed our 
 notice, when he spoiled all by mentioning that it 
 had been bought as the rural retreat of a well- 
 known hotel-keeper and coach-proprietor in Edin- 
 burgh, who left this neighbourhood when a boy, 
 with only half-a-crown in his pocket, and who, by 
 persevering industry, gained enough to return here 
 as a landed proprietor. He must greatly have 
 missed the mail coaches, and did not long survive 
 this experiment of rural felicity, the estate having 
 descended, on his death, to a nephew. 
 
 Here the hedges of brilliant roses, the rocky 
 precipices, and larch-covered hills, form a combina- 
 tion of indescribable beauty, varied by a foaming 
 stream, which gives life to the whole. After pass- 
 ing Logic Rait, however, the country became more 
 English, with rich undulating meadows, massy trees, 
 corn fields, and a perfectly level road, though en- 
 closed within a double range of green hills and ditto 
 wooded. We now passed another succession of 
 small properties, too thickly studded to be extensive, 
 in consequence of which it has been humorously re- 
 marked of one place, that the house is as broad as 
 
. LOGIE RAIT. 315 
 
 the estate. These residences are all chiefly inhab- 
 ited by the royal clan of Stewart. When the pres- 
 ent Duke of Orleans overheard some Highlanders 
 once, in a steam-boat, discussing their different clans, 
 he came good-humouredly forward and said, " I am 
 of a greater clan than any of you ! I am a Stuart !" 
 The historian of the Highland regiments. General 
 Stewart, who had concentrated many branches of 
 the family in his own person, used sometimes to be 
 heard reflecting, in a truly Celtic tone, on the alarm- 
 ing diminution of the still numerous clan, saying, 
 " There's very few Stewarts in the country now ! 
 There's Stewart of Garth ! I'm Stewart of Garth ! 
 There's Stewart of Drummacharry ! I'm Stewart 
 of Drummacharry ! There's Stewart of Kynnachan ! 
 I'm Stewart of Kynnachan ! !" The letters in this 
 neighbourhood meet with so odd a reception when 
 they arrive, that I do not intend to correspond with 
 any of the inhabitants. We observed at Clochfoldie, 
 and other places, that a hollow stone, conspicuously 
 white-washed, is built into the park wall, contain- 
 ing a narrow slit, which serves as a letter-box, and 
 the post-man, running along the road, blows a blast 
 on his horn and there deposits all the news and 
 gossip of the day, in so quiet a receptacle that the 
 whole packet may lie dormant for weeks till some 
 one has leisure or curiosity to extricate it from this 
 cold imprisonment. A similar plan is still adopted 
 in the eastern parts of Yorkshire, where I saw last 
 
316 WEEM. 
 
 year something which resembled a lamp-post, sta- 
 tioned on the road-side near every farm-house, car- 
 rying a wooden box on the top to receive the family 
 despatches. Letters have lost all their rank and 
 aristocracy now, by the abolition of franks, which 
 also diminishes the importance of a seat in Parlia- 
 ment more than you or other sensible people would 
 believe. The first thing a new M. P. did formerly, 
 was to rehearse the pattern of his frank, how to 
 distort his hand-writing so that the signature might 
 be sufficiently unreadable, and whether to sign it in 
 the north-east corner of his covei*, or in the south- 
 west, or to arrange it, as a certain M. P. did, in a 
 semi-circle, like the bow of a Cupid. We never 
 used to be in company formerly with a Member of 
 Parliament at dinner, without a general whisper 
 being circulated round the room that an opportunity 
 had at last occurred for securing a frank, while he 
 had a daily opportunity of conferring favours on 
 ten eager applicants, all volubly grateful on behalf 
 of themselves and their country correspondents ; 
 but Members of Parliament need scarcely learn to 
 write now unless they please. 
 
 The \dllage of Weem has become a model of 
 cheerfulness and comfort under the active and be- 
 nevolent care of Sir Neil Menzies, the proprietor. 
 Instead of pursuing those sudden and violent schemes 
 of improvement which, even when successful, occa- 
 sion much intermediate distress, he has gradually, 
 
WE EM. 317 
 
 but with admirable effect, encouraged industry, and 
 rebuilt by degrees, as the old tenants died or removed, 
 every cottage on the estate, now almost unrivalled, 
 for its thriving well-ordered aspect, throughout a 
 circuit of many miles. We were told that Sir Neil 
 enables his tenantry to manufacture the w^hole pro- 
 duce of their farms in the neighbourhood, which en- 
 sures them a certain market. For this purpose he 
 has established two distilleries to consume the grain, 
 and besides, to dispose of the wool, a most success- 
 fid carpet manufactory, which might put Kidder- 
 minster out of countenance. I admired particularly 
 one carpet made here, which displayed the colours 
 of the Menzies' tartan, the pattern being branches 
 of scarlet geranium on a white ground. 
 
 Not a drain or an enclosure seems wanting on this 
 vast estate, where the hedges for miles around are like 
 walls of leaves, and the cattle appeared of such first- 
 rate excellence, that I heard without surprise of their 
 having gained the highest prizes in succession at the 
 cattle shows of Stirhng, Aberdeen, and Inverness. 
 
 The extreme attachment of the people here to 
 their chief, is quite of the old school, and founded 
 not merely on ancient associations, but on the daily 
 and hourly experience of almost parental liberahty 
 and kindness in promoting the interests, and even 
 the amusements of old and young, which are en- 
 couraged and patronized with unceasing attention 
 27* 
 
318 CASTLE MENZIES. 
 
 to their happiness. Here, too, the sick are person- 
 ally visited and assisted with such unsparing zeal, 
 that none seem neglected in the wide circuit of this 
 very extensive estate. I was particularly interested 
 in seeing an old man of ninety-eight, a pensioner 
 of the family, who walks daily from the village to 
 the castle for work, and seems to think the world 
 could scarcely get on without him, and least of all 
 the chief's family ; an agreeable delusion in which 
 he is allowed to continue, though often there is great 
 difficulty in inventing any employment suited to his 
 very limited powers. 
 
 Near the venerable old house of Castle Menzies 
 grow the finest sycamore trees in Scotland, over- 
 shadowing the beautiful park, which is barricadoed 
 round with wooded hills and lofty mountains. Close 
 behind the castle rises a singularly tall abrupt hill, 
 almost a sheer precipice from top to bottom, and 
 charmingly varied by trees, which have grappled 
 hold of the rocks, and manage, in a way of their 
 own, to keep their stations, but you and I would be 
 very sorry for ourselves, if we seemed as precariously 
 situated as many of them are. 
 
 Near the door of Castle Menzies may be seen 
 " The Chieftain's Stone," a large round block of 
 granite, weighing more than I venture to guess, 
 which the next heir, on succeeding to the supremacy 
 of this clan, Avas always expected to carry in his 
 
CASTLE MENZIES. 319 
 
 arms up stairs to the dining-room, where his health 
 was drank. It would be almost as easy to lift the 
 house, or to run away with Schihallion at once ; 
 but if this achievement would have puzzled Hercu- 
 les, there is a Bacchanalian's cup in the Macleod 
 family, almost equally defying ordinary power, 
 formed to contain a bottle and a half of claret, which 
 each successive chief is expected to drain at a 
 draught. I think such an achievement would have 
 made Bacchus himself become mortal. 
 
 Castle Menzies is one of the few veij large old 
 houses in Perthshire, — " Long has it stood — still 
 honour'd let it stand." The walls are ten feet thick, 
 being proof against the assault of a foe, but always 
 open to a friend, as the scenery around is not more 
 truly Highland than the welcome within. Some 
 centuries ago, the yet more ancient family residence 
 stood on a different site, but the clan Menzies hav- 
 ing peacefully assembled once in great numbers for 
 a christening festivity, the ancestor of Stewart of 
 Garth marched down with a host of retainers, be- 
 sieged the old fortifications, barricadoed the doors, 
 and set fire to the house, on which occasion a hun- 
 dred Menzies perished ! Murder was committed in 
 those days, both wholesale and retail, particularly 
 by smoking, but in many Highland cottages now, 
 the inhabitants appear so thoroughly seasoned with 
 peat and tobacco, that it would be no easy matter 
 
320 CASTLE MENZIES. 
 
 to put them out of their usual atmosphere. Many 
 old women we saw during our tour, who looked 
 themselves like cigars ready to be lighted. 
 
 The new Castle, if it can be called new, was 
 built in 1573, by the same architect who reared one 
 at Taymouth, since razed to the ground, and it is 
 said that these two edifices occupied eleven years in 
 building. An elegant modern addition, uniform with 
 the old edifice, is now in progress under the eye of 
 Burn, who has all the quarries in Scotland at work. 
 The windows here exhibit very handsome gabled 
 ornaments on the exterior, and within we saw closets 
 cut in the thickness of the wall, quite a la Mrs. 
 Radcliffe. After the family papers had narrowly 
 escaped the fire and ravages consequent on Garth's 
 attack, they were deposited here in a safe, like that 
 of a bank, or more like a square stone wall, entered 
 by a trap door from above, and inaccessible to fire, 
 air, earth, or water — as secure, in short, as the man- 
 uscripts of Pompeii. 
 
 In the sitting-room here, the embrasures of the 
 windows are so deep, that with a curtain let down, 
 they form a comfortable and commodious apartment, 
 so cheerful and bright sometimes, I could fancy my- 
 self living in the sun itself, though, perhaps, the 
 cheerful society within adds a beam or two of viva- 
 city to those venerable walls. It is astonishing in 
 so antique a Highland residence to hear nothing of 
 
GLENLYON. 321 
 
 a ghost ; Mr. Burn should certainly be requested to 
 
 supply the deficiency by building a haunted room, 
 
 Where the curtains will shake of their own accord, 
 And the raven croak at the window board. 
 
 Near one extremity of the park at Castle Men- 
 zies, the Tay and the Lyon meet in a scene of such 
 marvellous beauty, that I sat down for half-an hour 
 to be in ecstasies, and to pity at my leisure all those 
 who live elsewhere. Through a long range of richly 
 cultivated meadows, these two broad rivers rush 
 violently into each other's arms, and the mountains 
 are all gathered round to witness the scene. One 
 tall peak of Schihallion had caught a side glimpse 
 of sunshine, which lighted up its usually frowning 
 aspect, and the waving forests on every neighbour- 
 ing hill were tipped with golden light. 
 
 We drove seven miles through the narrow 
 mountainous vale of Glenlyon, an exqiusite specimen 
 of Highland beauty, being enlivened by the sparkling 
 river, and hemmed in by hills glowing with heather. 
 It might have made a schoolboy tremble to see how 
 the birches were waving over our heads ; and here 
 the mountains are so lofty that villages lying at their 
 base are three or four months every year without 
 seeing the sun. The river Lyon, which now looked 
 like a flood of light, once ran red with the blood of 
 the slaughtered Macgregors, when, after a fierce con- 
 flict, the conquerors washed their swords in the stream. 
 
 Not a feature in this landscape could be altered 
 
322 GLENLYOX. 
 
 without injury, and a painter might advantageously 
 spend his whole life in taking views, every one of 
 which would appear completely different. In some 
 places you seem to have discovered an unknown 
 world, never trod by human footstep, then comes an 
 old ruin, hiding its decay in wreaths of ivy and roses, 
 next appears a smiling village, afterwards a long 
 colonnade of superb plane or ash trees, then a thriv- 
 ing farm, here and there a church; and the old 
 burying-ground at Fortingal, is particularly interest- 
 ing. Go where you will, " we cannot leave the 
 footsteps of the dead," and I often think how strange 
 it is to consider, that for several thousand years, hun- 
 dreds of men have died every day, and hundreds are 
 as regularly born to succeed them. It has been a 
 long and ceaseless procession for centuries, from the 
 cradle to the grave, in which year after year new 
 actors appear and vanish ; but our turn to walk for 
 a time along the busy scenes of life has now come, 
 and then, like the millions who have preceded us, 
 we shall plunge into the gulf of eternity, making 
 way for those in rapid succession who follow. 
 None can stay his own progress — none can choose 
 when he shall be summoned upon the stage of life, 
 or torn away from its fleeting scenes ; but the Chris- 
 tian need fear no evil, as there is prepared for us a 
 holy garment to wear during our progress, the robe 
 of our Saviour's righteousness, sheltered in which we 
 may safely and peacefully pass from the vicissitudes 
 
GLENLYON. 323 
 
 of time, into the glorious mansions of eternity. His 
 followers and disciples may confidently go forward 
 to join the many who have preceded them into the 
 regions of glory, and there wait for the many who 
 shall yet be called to join the heavenly host in their 
 songs of everlasting joy and praise. 
 
 In this church-yard many ancient graves were 
 overshadowed once by the largest yew tree ever 
 known, which could have furnished bows for her 
 Majesty's whole body-guard of archers. It measured 
 fifty-six feet round, and, until lately, carriages at- 
 tending a funeral used to drive through the hollow 
 trunk. There only remains now one little monu- 
 ment of its existence, in the shape of a small stunted 
 fragment, not larger than a tombstone. Seeing this 
 forlorn leafless relic, one might be apt to forget that 
 it ever was young and flourishing, as children who 
 behold the aged survivors of a past generation, 
 look upon them often with a sort of contemptuous 
 pity, and fancy they are made only for decay and 
 death. There are three distinct stages which we 
 must expect to experience in the attachment of those 
 around us. The fond and partial affection of our 
 parents in childhood, is exchanged in after life for 
 the companionship and confidence of cotemporaries, 
 but when these early associates are swept into the 
 grave, if we live to see that painful hour when the 
 closest and dearest ties of an earthly existence are 
 
324 GLENLYON. 
 
 severed by the tomb, then comes the tune when we 
 must be satisfied with the compassionate sympathy 
 of a subsequent generation. When memory, instead 
 of hope, becomes our only hnk to the world, an 
 aged Christian must fervently long for that hour 
 when " the weary springs of life stand still at last," 
 and when he shall be born into a new and better 
 world, there to regain the long lost friends, forgot- 
 ten perhaps by all but himself, whom once he loved 
 and knew. In such a case, who would not envy 
 the weary pilgrim, when closing his eyes on the 
 sorrows and infirmities of a present life, in the be- 
 lieving hope that his sufferings are over, and the 
 victory won for him by a once crucified and now 
 glorified Redeemer ? 
 
 " Oh, mourn not for them, their grief is o'er ; 
 Oh, weep not for them, they weep no more ; 
 For deep is their sleep, though cold and hard 
 Their pillow may be in the old kirk-yard." 
 
 Along this glen, we passed the scene of a tragi- 
 cal event, in which there certainly seems to have 
 been almost an instance of second sight. A most 
 promising and intelligent young man, Mr. Campbell, 
 factor to Sir Neil Menzies, was most unfortunately 
 killed here five years ago, by his horse taking fright, 
 and leaping over the parapet of a bridge, when 
 both the animal and his rider were dashed to pieces. 
 On examining his papers, it was found that, in the 
 
GLENLYON. 325 
 
 morning of that fatal day, he had risen particularly 
 early, and made his will, leaving eveiy article he 
 possessed to different friends. Even his wardrobe 
 and pocket-handkerchiefs were specified, and not a 
 single thing omitted, except the clothes he rode 
 out in. 
 
 We must not claim second-sight, however, for 
 the well-known General Stewart of Garth, whose 
 residence, Drummacharry, being in the glen, he 
 gave a farewell-dinner here to all his neighboui-s, 
 on the occasion of his departing to take a command 
 in the West Indies, and made a speech, inviting the 
 whole party to reassemble at the same table that 
 day three years j but, alas ! before as many months 
 had elapsed, that brave and talented officer fell a 
 victim to the climate. His estate has been sold to 
 Sir Archibald Campbell of Burmese celebrity, but I 
 did not hear whether he fulfilled his predecessor's 
 promise, of a dinner on the day specified. It is cu- 
 rious that no hospitable bon-vivant ever thought of 
 instituting an annual dinner, with ices, turkeys, and 
 champaign, in commemoration of his own memory, 
 to be continued as long as any one survived who 
 had personally known him. It would be some- 
 thing new, and might ensure his not being forgotten 
 under a certain number of years, which is by no 
 means a very easy object for any one to accomplish 
 in these busy stirring times. 
 28 
 
TAYMOUTH, 
 
 He saw apartments where appear'd to rise 
 What seem'd as men, and fix'd on him their eyes — 
 Pictures that spoke ; and there were mirrors tall, 
 Doubling each wonder b)' reflecting all. 
 
 Crabbe. 
 
 My dear Cousin, — It is not always true, as 
 writing masters persist in telling their pupils, that 
 " Familiarity breeds contempt." On the con- 
 trary, every day, as it increases my intimacy with 
 the Highlands, increases also my respect and admi- 
 ration for them, so that I wish to learn by heart 
 every nook and cranny throughout their wide extent, 
 and feel convinced that life is too short for studying 
 thoroughly, and enjoying sufficiently, their inex- 
 haustible beauties. 
 
 We this morning treated our eyes to a sight of 
 Taymouth, anciently Balloch, one of the chief 
 glories of Scotland, belonging for many centuries 
 past to the ancestors of Lord Breadalbane, the 
 present proprietor, whose family motto has this pe- 
 culiarity, that such of the Campbells as are branches 
 of the same stem, all carry a sentence which replies 
 to their leader. The Marquis says, " Follow me ;" 
 to which one family answers, " I follow j" another. 
 
TAYMOUTH CASTLE. 327 
 
 " Thus far ;" a third, " I bide my time;" a fourth, 
 " Victory follows the brave ;" and a fifth, " I follow 
 what is right ;" a most judicious limitation to their 
 allegiance. The late Peer somewhat perplexed the 
 ignorant Highlanders, who had been accustomed 
 from time immemorial to call their noble landlords, 
 " Breada-a-albane," by insisting on the more mod- 
 ern appellation of " My Lo-o-ord," to which they 
 are now becoming somewhat accustomed, though it 
 still seems to them a great diminution of dignity. 
 
 The Emperor of Russia once declared that if he 
 were not Alexander he would be a British country 
 gentleman, but I go far beyond him, being convinced 
 that Taymouth Castle would be incomparably pre- 
 ferable to the Imperial palace at Petersburgh, and 
 you will think the same as soon as you have seen 
 both, which, by the way, I have not yet done 
 myself. 
 
 The rushing Tay devolves from its parent lake 
 at the west end of the park, which is varied by fine 
 specimens of forest trees in every variety, and situ- 
 ated between two ranges of mountains, wooded to 
 their summits, and torn asunder to make way for 
 the broad expanse of pleasure grounds between. 
 
 With a few architectural faults, this house is a 
 noble baronial pile, which has few rivals in the 
 Highlands, but the nearer any thing approaches to 
 being a ne plus ultra, the more inclined people are to 
 
328 TAYMOUTH CASTLE. 
 
 exhibit that most universal of all talents, a taste for 
 fault-finding, of which I must now give you a speci- 
 men. Those who are so fastidious that they cannot 
 exist without perfection, should leave this world as 
 soon as possible ; but while the objections of critics 
 are often frivolous and vexatious, I like to hear the 
 opinions of judges, who keep all their eyes open for 
 beauty, and only look askance at defects ; accord- 
 ingly, I agree with those who object to a wing of 
 the old house having been allowed to survive, which 
 is obviously incongruous with the modern castle, 
 and breaks the line in a plan decidedly meant to be 
 formal. This excrescence, which has baffled the 
 united taste of the present proprietor and of the 
 modern architect, was retained by the late Mar- 
 quis as his home while he reared this elegant castle, 
 and he became so attached to it that the addition 
 would at last have been thrown down by him rather 
 than the original. The new edifice forms a large 
 solid square, flanked by handsome round towers at 
 each corner. One wing on the right contains an 
 elegant private chapel, embellished with a highly 
 ornamented tower, and the corresponding wing, — 
 which does not, however, correspond at all, — is a 
 long gothic edifice containing the stables and offices. 
 If any description could do half-quarter justice 
 to this unsurpassable place, you would say my sketch 
 must be "phis belle que la vcrite.^^ Only fancy its 
 
TAYMOUTH CASTLE. 329 
 
 terrace winding by the river side, its three miles of 
 beeches, its lime trees, — forming a gothic arch of 
 nearly a mile long, — the forest glades, the flowery 
 meadows, the rocks, and wooded hills ! If a fairy 
 oifered to add whatever we might propose to em- 
 bellish the scene, what could you ask for more 1 
 The gardens are delicious, and nothing enchanted 
 me more than a fancy dairy, built some years ago, 
 of transparent spar, like rough blocks of ice, pro- 
 jecting so as to catch every sun-beam, and to reflect 
 back all the prismatic colours of the rainbow. It 
 looks as if an ice-berg had been stranded here and 
 excavated for the occasion, or as if the Empress 
 Catherine had sent over a specimen of her celebrated 
 frozen-palace to astonish the Highlands. 
 
 Under a grove of trees, I suddenly observed a 
 noble herd of red-deer, and it would have driven 
 any sportsman crazy with delight to see these grace- 
 ful creatures all starting up at our approach. They 
 stared for some time, then trotted away in a line, 
 tossing their branching horns with inexpressible 
 dignity, and after performing a sort of military 
 movement round the park, they formed in a half 
 circle, wheeled rapidly past us, and took up a com- 
 manding position on a high bank very near where 
 we stood, appearing there to the utmost advantage. 
 
 At this moment I began to have a glimmering 
 recollection that this was the very spot where, two 
 28* 
 
330 TAYMOUTH CASTLE. 
 
 years ago, one of these very animals attacked. Mr. 
 Fox Maule's carriage-horses, and killed one, besides 
 severely wounding the other. This caused me some 
 little panic on beholding the regiment of antlers 
 bristling in formidable array so very near, and on 
 turning a sharp corner we found ourselves close to 
 one tall stately-looking hart. He seemed perfectly 
 tame, and allowed me to pat him, becoming gradu- 
 ally so propitiated by our friendly attentions, that 
 he turned to join the party, and actually walked at 
 least a mile in our company, evidently much pleased 
 with his new associates, and looking so intelligent 
 that he seemed to understand all we said. The red- 
 deer are very dangerous, however, in this half-tame 
 state, and one transported lately to Ireland, became so 
 furious that after killing one man and attacking a 
 second, he had to be shot. During our progress, 
 therefore, I wished it had been possible civilly to get 
 rid of our new companion, as I did not particularly 
 enjoy walking in this way, arm and arm with so 
 formidable a stranger, but he behaved extremely 
 well, and seemed really sorry to leave us, when 
 
 A slammed the gate in his face, on our quitting 
 
 the park. 
 
 Several bisons from South America were like- 
 wise grazing near the house at Taymouth, so we 
 were in a perfect zoological garden, without the ad- 
 vantage of cages, which are, on the whole, rather 
 
TAYMOUTH CASTLE. 331 
 
 desirable under such circumstances. I was after- 
 wards informed that these far-travelled foreigners 
 are, even in their own country, exceedingly fierce, 
 but in the rich pastures of Perthshire the bisons be- 
 come still more irritable. They did not, however, 
 take the trouble of tossing us ! 
 
 The Baron's hall, at Taymouth Castle, with its 
 cathedral-like door, is a splendid room, the wain- 
 scot of richly carved oak, the windows of painted 
 glass, emblazoned with the family arms, and the 
 oak floor so extremely slippery that only a skilful 
 skaiter should venture across. 
 
 In the drawing-room hang two portraits alleg- 
 ed to be Vandyke's best. That artist's great patron, 
 with whom he frequently resided, was Rich, Earl of 
 Holland, one of the handsomest men of the age ; 
 and ample justice has been done here to the chival- 
 ric appearance of that nobleman, so admired at court 
 that Charles the First became jealous, and caused 
 him to be imprisoned within his own house. The 
 Earl's politics, like the Vicar of Bray's, were most 
 accommodating, but nevertheless, he died on the 
 scaffold at last, for making one final effort in behalf 
 of his royal master. That melancholy end is what I 
 always expect to hear of, when admiring any fine 
 chevalier-looking portrait of a distinguished man in 
 those turbulent days. The costume of this picture 
 is too splendid for almost any court in the present 
 
332 TAYMOUTH CASTLE. 
 
 time. What would Louis Philippe's mud-bespattered 
 courtiers say to Lord Holland's white boots trimmed 
 with point, a dress of white and gold, and a scarlet 
 cloak flowing down behind, while his magnificent 
 armour, which seems to have been that moment put 
 off, is glittering beside him 1 
 
 The other Vandyke represents Lord Holland's 
 elder brother, the Earl of Warwick, High Admiral 
 of England, and a steady supporter of Cromwell's. 
 In those days he kept open house for the clergy, 
 saying, "I make merry with them and at them." 
 This picture is very animated, the dress beautiful, 
 and the silken hose so exceedingly pink that they 
 would put a rose to the blush, but in those days 
 silk stockings were borrowed even by a crowned 
 monarch, and few noblemen beings rich enoufjh to 
 have any, the painter has shown them due attention. 
 
 Here also we observed several pictures by 
 Jameson, the Scottish Vandyke, whose prices would 
 be an excellent example to modern artists, for we 
 might all sit, if portraits of first-rate merit cost only 
 £1, 3s. 4d. per head ! Most of the Tay mouth an- 
 cestors are now in London, getting themselves re- 
 freshed, re-gilt, and re-varnished, but we saw the 
 first Lord Breadalbane, one of the cleverest men in 
 his day, who married the daughter of Lord Holland, 
 and, when she died, he gained large estates in Caith- 
 ness, by espousing a widow, heiress to the ancient 
 
GLAMMIS CASTLE. 333 
 
 Earls of Caithness. Having occasion to conquer 
 his newly acquired territory, he caused a ship, laden 
 with whiskey, to be purposely stranded off the coast, 
 and when the people assembled to plunder it, he 
 surprised them in a state of intoxication, and de- 
 feated the revellers with great slaughter. 
 
 In the new addition to Taymouth Castle, some 
 of the sitting-rooms appear only to be accessible by 
 passing through the chapel ; and the ceiling of the 
 libraiy has already cost j£300. It is most elaborately 
 decorated in the antique style, with deep cornices, 
 and a profusion of curious devices ; but in order fully 
 to examine and appreciate all the ornaments, a 
 visiter would require to prostrate himself for some 
 hours on the floor. 
 
 About twelve miles beyond Cupar, in the rich 
 valley of Strathmore, stands the beautiful castle of 
 Glammis, a tall building nearly one hundred feet 
 high, with a world of spires, towers, turrets, and 
 battlements ; but its greatest peculiarity is the shape, 
 having four wings projecting like spokes of a wheel, 
 towards different points of the compass. It has for 
 ages past belonged to the Earls of Strathmore, who 
 must have been, if painters did not flatter in former 
 days, as they sometimes do now, a singularly hand- 
 some race. The most interesting event in this fam- 
 ily w'as the tragical fate of the young, innocent, and 
 beautiful Lady Glammis, publicly and ignominiously 
 
334 GLAMMIS CASTLE. 
 
 burned to death for witchcraft on the Castlehill of 
 Edinburgh. She was sister to the Earl of Angus, 
 whom James the Fifth, his step-son, hated, and his 
 royal detestation against the house of Douglas, led 
 him to accuse this amiable lady of " spelling away 
 his life." His Majesty certainly contrived to shorten 
 hers I Lady Glammis's son, a mere child, was for- 
 feited, imprisoned, and condemned to be executed, 
 but after the king's death he was restored. His 
 eldest son, the chancellor, was slain by accident, 
 in consequence of a feud with the Earl of Craw- 
 ford ; and his second son was the gruff Master of 
 Glammis, who kept the door against King James 
 during the famous raid of Ruthven ; and when the 
 young monarch burst into tears, he dryly remarked, 
 " Better that children weep than bearded men," a 
 view of the subject which his Majesty never forgot. 
 
 In later times there were six brothers in this 
 family, who, each in succession, became Earl of 
 Strathmore, and the last died a very amiable death 
 when endeavouring to pacify some angry combat- 
 ants in a brawl. 
 
 As we are homeward-bound now, I expect soon 
 to exchange writing for speaking, and nanrative 
 for dialogue, which will be a most welcome improve- 
 ment in our intercourse, and I hope our two minds 
 will often strike a hght between them. I have 
 sometimes thought how curious it would be, if a 
 
GLAMMIS CASTLE. 335 
 
 volume were supernaturally to appear at the end of 
 men's lives, containing all they have ever spoken. 
 Some would be seen to have scarcely uttered so 
 many words altogether as would fill a small duode- 
 cimo, while others have rattled out more in a day 
 than most people in a year ; but, as Pope says, the 
 tongue is a race-horse, that runs the faster the less 
 it carries. We shall both of course hit exactly the 
 happy medium between taciturnity and volubility ; 
 meantime wishing yoii joy of having so voluminous 
 a correspondent, I bid you once more, a very short 
 adieu. 
 
 Lost in earth, in air, or main, 
 Kindred atoms meet again ! 
 
BLAIR-ATHOL. 
 
 Give ear unto my song, 
 
 And if you find it wondrous short, 
 
 It cannot hold you long. Goldsmith. 
 
 My dear Cousin, — This is the only letter I have 
 yet felt any regret in sitting down to write, being 
 my P.P.C. It is always unpleasant to do any thing 
 for the last time, — even when finally stepping out 
 of an old hack-chaise. I could almost muster up 
 some fine feelings for the occasion. Conceive then 
 my emotion, on parting with this veteran pen, split 
 up to the hilt, and on giving it a final dip into ink 
 as thick as a pudding ; but one great secret of writing 
 is, to know the proper time for stopping, and I 
 agree with a very sensible French writer who 
 remarks, " C'est le role d'un sot d'etre invportun. 
 L'homme sage, scait disparoifre le moment qui pre- 
 cede celui ou il seroit de trop.^' 
 
 A gay annual meeting takes place in Perthshire 
 at this season, for the practice and exhibition of all 
 those athletic games and exercises for which the 
 Highlanders used formerly to be so pre-eminent, and 
 as it is held this year close to Blair-Athol, at the 
 bridge of Tilt, we thought our best compensation 
 for not seeing Lord Eglinton's Tilting would be, to 
 
BLAIR-ATHOL. 337 
 
 join this rendezvous at the Tilt meetmg, especially, 
 as we were invited to accompany a party with whom 
 it would have been a pleasure to go anywhere, and 
 accordingly we proceeded to what an English 
 stranger called by mistake " the kilt meeting." 
 
 Here, as well as at the Ayrshire tournament, the 
 spectators would all have required the Humane So- 
 ciety's apparatus to recover drowned persons, for the 
 rain fell in such torrents, it really was a natural cu- 
 riosity worth coming all the distance to see. Though 
 wind and weather did not permit, however, crowds 
 remained many hours on the ground, and in full stare, 
 and certainly a more curious exhibition can scarcely 
 be fancied than those Olympic games of the North. 
 
 On a grassy plain, like a magnified bowling- 
 green, surrounded by a ring of wild and wooded 
 mountains, we saw a brilliant circle of carriages, 
 filled with ladies — all young and beautiful, of course 
 — wearing arches of feathers over their heads, and 
 gardens of flowers underneath their bonnets. Within 
 this wreath of beauty and fashion, was collected a 
 multitude of tall, fine-looking Highlanders, showily 
 dressed in the gay tartans of their various clans. 
 Here kilts, philabegs, plaids, dirks. Highland bon- 
 nets, and eagles' feathers w^ere all mingled in one 
 dazzling medley, varied by the animated counte- 
 nances of those who wore them, all glowing with 
 health, excitement, and good humour. The scene 
 29 
 
338 BLAIR-ATHOL. 
 
 was greatly enlivened by the warlike bagpipes, dec- 
 orated with magnificent banners, and long streamers 
 which floated like rainbows in the air ; and without 
 doubt the most dignified looking human being who 
 steps upon the earth, is a Highland piper in full cos- 
 tume, his feathers waving like cedar trees in his bon- 
 net, while he blows through his pipe till he almost 
 blows his head off, and struts about, as if he were 
 leading all his clansmen to victory. We have 
 never been distinctly told what was " the tune the 
 cow died of," but I am convinced it could only be a 
 Highland pibroch. 
 
 The chieftains, noblemen, and gentlemen in gen- 
 eral, wore the undress tartan livery of their clans, 
 exactly similar to that of their tenants, servants, or 
 dependents, and we were expected to distinguish the 
 aristocracy from the democracy, not by any advan- 
 tages of dress and ornament, but by a native superi- 
 ority of air, manner, and appearance. In some cases 
 this was very easily done, for we could trace a dig- 
 nity of exterior in those accustomed to authority and 
 distinction, carrying " pride in their port, and defi- 
 ance in their eye," which announced at once a man 
 of birth and rank, but, on the other hand, there were 
 many illustrious individuals, who relied on our pen- 
 etration rather too implicitly. Among so many fine 
 soldier-like men, practised in fencing, dancing, and 
 other manly exercises, it required something very 
 
BLAIR-ATHOL. 339 
 
 nearly superhuman to cause an instinctive recogni- 
 tion of any person's real rank and consequence. If 
 the officers in a regiment were all equipped exactly 
 like the men, and indiscriminately mingled together, 
 it might puzzle even a Field Marshal, or a Lord in 
 Waiting to discriminate the difference ; and even a 
 Highland chief, in coarse tartan plaid, and blue bon- 
 net, looks sometimes, to an ordinary eye, not very 
 unlike a Highland drover. 
 
 I have heard of such a contradiction in terms as 
 " an aristocratic democrat," which may do in poli- 
 tics perhaps, but can scarcely be hit off in dress ; 
 and it is such voluntary levelling of their own exter- 
 nal distinctions in the higher classes, which produces 
 Radicalism and discontent among the lower orders. 
 If noblemen and landed proprietors, instead of 
 " hiding behind the veil of insignificancy," would 
 take the trouble — for a trouble it certainly must be — 
 to appear on all public occasions in a degree of state 
 suitable to their dignity, we should hear less about 
 the feelings of equality and insubordination, which 
 are now so rapidly increasing among those who, 
 being unable to estimate moral and intellectual pre- 
 eminence, know nothing -of great men but their out- 
 ward aspect, and who observe little in that respect 
 very obviously superior to themselves. You have 
 often seen the sun, when shorn of his beams, look 
 very like the moon, and I could fancy how conve- 
 
340 BLAIR-ATHOL. 
 
 nient it would be to a peacock, if he could go about 
 occasionally quite incog without his tail, but then 
 he must not be surprised if other birds think them- 
 selves as good as he. The old proverb is really 
 mistaken in saying, that " pride feels no pain," be- 
 cause it is often put to a great deal of inconvenience 
 by the external trappings of magnificence, which 
 nevertheless it is unfair towards all ranks of society, 
 entirely to lay aside. 
 
 A tall grand looking Highlander in full costume 
 was pointed out to me at the Tilt meeting, who held 
 himself particularly erect, and walked with a free 
 and graceful step. My companion whispered that 
 
 he was the eldest son of Lord S n, and I never 
 
 guessed, of course, that there could be any mistake, 
 till several minutes afterwards, when he appeared 
 in the ring as a competitor, instead of a judge, and 
 he turned out to be an innkeeper, celebrated for his 
 prowess and activity. It must be difficult for men 
 making so astonishing a display of agility and power, 
 which they probably occupy years in acquiring, to 
 remember always the admonition of the Holy Scrip- 
 ture, not to " glory in their strength." 
 
 Each performer successively carried the well- 
 grown trunk of a larch tree, nearly twenty feet 
 long, quite erect in his hands, and after running a 
 few steps, threw it violently forward with so strong 
 an impetus, that the top struck the ground, and it 
 
BLAIR-ATHOL. 341 
 
 wheeled completely over, describing a half-circle in 
 the air. As one competitor after another attempted 
 this Herculean feat, a pause of intense interest took 
 place, but the greatest success«did not elicit a sowp- 
 gon of applause. If the audience had been com- 
 posed of Madame Tassaud's wax-work figures, they 
 could scarcely have remained more passive. Except 
 a glance of surprise exchanged between those who 
 stood nearest each other, no external symptom of 
 approbation appeared ! It is so commonly the case 
 in Scotland, that orators, musicians, and other pub- 
 lic performers, become discouraged and abashed by 
 the solemn silence which follows their most bril- 
 liant efforts, that I mean to invent a machine, and 
 take out a patent for it, which shall make a sound 
 like the clapping of several hundred hands, when- 
 ever any single individual touches the spring, 
 which will thus fill up the pauses of orators, while 
 searching for an idea, and afford the encouragement 
 necessary for carrying on every display of ability 
 with proper spirit. The only speech I have heard 
 of lately which excited sufficient enthusiasm, was 
 that of a political candidate to a Radical mob, when 
 he began by saying, " Gentlemen !" and not one of 
 the audience having ever been thus addressed before, 
 the burst of applause became so deafening, that not 
 another word of his speech was audible. 
 
 Highland dancing displays incomparable execu- 
 29* 
 
342 BLAIR-ATHOL. 
 
 tion, and requires a rapidity of movement which the 
 eye can scarcely follow. One of the performances 
 would have amused you much, on account of the ex- 
 treme precision and neatness which it required, being 
 quite in the hair-breadth style. Two walking sticks 
 are laid on the ground in a horizontal cross, within 
 the four angles of which a dancer undertakes to per- 
 form with matchless rapidity a series of the most 
 intricate steps, but the instant his foot accidentally 
 touches one of the sticks, he is obliged to stop. For- 
 merly two sharp swords supplied the place of those 
 inoffensive poles, and they so effectually disabled a 
 performer, after the slightest yatM; 'pas, from contin- 
 uing to exhibit, that he might as well have executed 
 his hornpipe among red-hot ploughshares. The 
 dance gets quicker and quicker, the music more 
 rapid, and the steps more intricate every instant, 
 while the competitor passes with ceaseless activity 
 over the prostrate sticks, springing so lightly across, 
 that his feet seem only pointing at the ground, with- 
 out ever resting on it. All that feet can do, these 
 Highlanders did, and more than I ever saw any feet 
 attempt before, but we all looked on in solemn 
 silence, as if witnessing an execution. 
 
 Nothing ever looked more like insanity than the 
 reels at last ! Four stout Highlanders, in full dress, 
 raised on a wet slippery wooden platform, and 
 dancing in the open air, under a torrent of rain, 
 
BLAIR -ATHOL. 343 
 
 cracking their fingers to imitate castenets, shuffling, 
 capeiing, cutting, whirhng round, and uttering a 
 sort of sudden yell, customary here, during a very 
 animated dance, to encourage the piper. In tolera- 
 ble weather this would have been all very enlivening, 
 but I felt grieved for the beautiful tartans, which 
 grew dim as we looked at them, and such joyous 
 merriment, under a canopy of mist, rain, and east 
 wind, seemed quite delirious. 
 
 The wives, sisters, and daughters of the perfor- 
 mers were all anxiously looking on from beneath 
 their cotton umbrellas with sensations of interest 
 and excitement, such as the greatest gambler on a 
 race-course might have envied, and my chief diver- 
 sion arose from watching their eager countenances, 
 while frequently, in a burst of uncontrollable excite- 
 ment, they broke through the lines, and advanced 
 within a few paces of the competitors. At one 
 moment, when the rain poured down with peculiar 
 vehemence, a crowd of dripping-wet clansmen, to 
 save their gay tartans, put up a multitude of umbrel- 
 las, and cowered so near our carriage for shelter, 
 that we saw nothing of the dancing. My teasing 
 dilemma being observed by one of the judges who 
 happened to pass, he obligingly resolved to befriend 
 me, and called out to the men in a tone of indignant 
 astonishment, " Put down these umbrellas ! ! Who 
 ever heard before of A Highlander WITH AN umbrella!" 
 
344 BLAIR-ATHOL. 
 
 Down dropped every umbrella on the spot, and 
 the poor men looked like convicted criminals, quite 
 humbled at the very idea of being considered effemi- 
 nate, while I really sympathized in their mortifica- 
 tion, aware that, to a Celt, no accusation could have 
 been more unwelcome. 
 
 As a learned philosopher once judiciously ob- 
 served, " every thing that has a limit must come to 
 an end ;" and now having introduced you to the 
 scenery, machinery, and decorations of the High- 
 lands, while the whole dramatis persona are col- 
 lected on the stage in a state of perfect happiness, I 
 must remember that, under such circumstances, it is 
 customary for either a comedy or tragedy to con- 
 clude, after which the manager makes his final 
 speech, filled with humility on account of his own 
 deficiencies, and of gratitude for favours received. 
 According, therefore, to established prescription, I 
 shall finish now, in the appropriate words of Shak- 
 speare : 
 
 Thus on your patience evermore attending, 
 New joy wait on you ! Here our play has ending. 
 
 Flourish of trumpets, drums and bagpipes, — 
 enter a procession of Highlanders. They form a 
 group, and the curtain gradually drops, amidst 
 thunders of applause. [Exeunt. 
 
 THE END. 
 
INDEX. 
 
 
 Aberdeen, .... 
 
 Page 
 . 259 
 
 College of, . . 
 
 261 
 
 Episcopal, Qhurch at, . 
 Abergeldie Castle, . . . . 
 
 . 263 
 
 284 
 
 Allyre, approach to, ? 
 
 Atholl, Duke of, . . . . 
 
 . 309 
 309 
 
 Barrogill Castle, . . . . 
 
 .58 
 
 Berridale, . . . . . 
 
 24 
 
 Brodie Castle, .... 
 
 . 145 
 
 Portraits at, ... 
 
 146 
 
 Balgownie, .... 
 BalVeny Castle, . . . • . 
 Ballindalloch, .... 
 
 . 175 
 
 186 
 
 . 186 
 
 Banff, ...... 
 
 234 
 
 Balmorrall, .... 
 
 . 285 
 
 Blairgowrie, ..... 
 
 294 
 
 Blair-Athol, .... 
 
 . 336 
 
 Tilt-meeting at, . 
 Caithness, .... 
 
 337 
 . 39 
 
 Ordof, . . . . 
 Fishermen of, . 
 
 21 
 
 27 
 
 Castle Grant, ..... 
 
 178 
 
 Portraits at, . 
 
 . 183 
 
 CuUen House, ..... 
 
 228 
 
 Portraits at, 
 
 . 229 
 
 Castle Fraser, . . , , , 
 
 267 
 
 Castle Forbes, .... 
 
 . 273 
 
 Craigievar, ..... 
 Castle, 
 
 278 
 
 . 277 
 
346 
 
 INDEX. 
 
 Craighall, 
 
 Castle Blair, .... 
 
 Castle Menzies, . 
 
 Dornoch, .... 
 
 Cathedral at, 
 Duke and Duchess of Sutherland, . 
 Dunrobin Castle, 
 
 Portraits at, 
 Dunbeath, Castle of, 
 Darnaway Castle, s- 
 
 Portraits at, ... 
 Dunphail, .... 
 
 Cummingof, 
 
 Great flood at, 
 Duff House, 
 
 Portraits at, . 
 Dunottar Castle, . 
 Dee, River, .... 
 Dunkeld, .... 
 
 Cathedral, . 
 
 Grounds of, 
 Elchies, .... 
 
 Elgin, .... 
 
 Cathedral at, 
 Fowling, Anecdotes of, . 
 Pair Isle, .... 
 
 Singular Religious destitution of, 
 
 Recommended as a Missionary Station, 
 
 Treatment of a shipwrecked crew at. 
 Fort Charlotte, .... 
 
 Ferrytown, 
 Forres, .... 
 
 Ancient Monument near, 
 Fochabers, .... 
 
 Infant Schools at, 
 
INDEX. 
 
 Fyvie, 
 
 Castle, 
 
 Park of, 
 
 Portraits at, . 
 Golspie, . 
 Girnigo Castle, 
 Grantown, . . 
 
 Glenfiddich, . 
 Gordon Castle, ; 
 
 Portraits at, , 
 Glenlivet, . 
 Glenlyon, 
 
 Large yew-tree at, 
 Gordon, Duke of, 
 
 Duchess of, 
 Glammis Castle, 
 Helmsdale, . 
 
 Castle of, 
 Huntly, Countess of, 
 Inverness, 
 
 Wool market at, 
 Invercauld, 
 
 John O'Groat's House, . 
 Kirkwall, 
 
 Cathedral of, 
 Kildrummy Castle, . 
 
 History of, 
 Killiecrankie, 
 Lerwick, . 
 
 Hospitality at. 
 Laird of Bonymoon, 
 Lynn of Dee, 
 Lude, 
 Logie Rait, 
 Lady Glammis, tragical fate of, 
 
348 
 
 INDEX. 
 
 Mitchell, James, 
 Moy House, 
 Morayshire, . 
 Monymusk, 
 Macbeih's Cairn, 
 Mar Lodge, 
 Nottingham House, 
 Nairn, 
 Pitfichy, 
 Reluglas, . 
 Sinclair Castle, 
 Stircoke, . 
 Second Sight, 
 Scrabster Castle, . 
 Shetland, 
 
 Road in. 
 
 Manufactures of, 
 
 First Steam-boat to, 
 
 Sheep of, 
 
 Ponies of, 
 
 Birds of. 
 Sir John Sinclair, 
 Sumburgh-head, 
 Sanda, Isle of, 
 Sanquhar House, 
 Spey Bridge, 
 Sir Neil Menzies, 
 Thurso, . 
 
 Castle of, 
 Taymouth, 
 
 Castle, 
 
 Portraits at, 
 Wick, , 
 
 Popish Chapel at, 
 Weem, . . 
 
 
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