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 iviuEAL PICTURE 
 
 PHILADELPHIA. 
 
 THE VIRTUES AND FRAUDS AND FOLLIES 
 OF THE CITY DELINEATED, 
 
 BY LOED E— , 
 
 FORMERLY OF ENGLAND, NOW A NATURALIZED CITIZEN 
 AND RESIDENT OF PHILADELPHIA. ' 
 
 ..^^a^' 
 
 COPYRIGHT SECURED. 
 
 
 PHILADELPHIA : 
 PRINTED FOR THE AUTHOR. 
 
 ■ ' '-- 1845. 
 
DEDICATION. 
 
 This small work is respectfully dedicated to the people of Philadel- 
 phia. The author has had a pleasant home in your midst the last eight 
 years, and has received much kindness from many of you. Your free 
 institutions and rising greatness drew me from afar. I have rejoiced 
 in the success and prosperity of the United States. Though horn in a 
 foreign land, I have ever deemed myself a Republican in principle. It 
 was chiefly my preference for republicanism that brought me hither 
 from beyond the Atlantic. Whilst I commend you for much, I hope 
 you will excuse me wliile I point out some of your faults. Ma^iy, 
 indeed, among you deserve no censure. I point out errors that they 
 may be removed, and tell of frauds and impositions, that the innocent 
 and confiding may be on their guard. When I speak of faults, it is 
 more in sorrow than in anger. My heart and soul are with America. 
 Your star of liberty has guided me hither. I have renounced the titles 
 that I bore among the proudest sons of England, and have sworn alle- 
 giance to your government. This work is devoted chiefly to Philadel- 
 phia; I love your fair city, and have spent many thousands for its 
 improvement. Here I have been happy, though living in comparative 
 obscurity. At some future period I may write a work of a more 
 general character. Your most obedient servant, 
 
 THE AUTHOR. 
 
• ^ A MORAL PICTURE, &c. 
 
 MERCHANTS AND DEALERS GENERALLY. 
 
 In no country are there greater stimulants to industry 
 and enterprise than in America. In no country does a 
 man's success in making a fortune. depend more on his 
 own efforts. This is owing, in a good measure, to the 
 liberal system of government. Here man is left free to 
 act for himself, and the genius of enterprise untrammeled 
 calls forth its giant energies. The commerce and trade 
 of Philadelphia have progressed rapidly ever since the 
 city was founded by William Penn. 
 
 The merchants and traders of this city should study 
 more political economy. But few of them are much ac- 
 quainted with this useful science. If they would study 
 more the nature of currency, they would be less under 
 the influence of banks, and would not rise and fall at 
 their nod, and by their expansions and contractions. 
 They should study more respecting what constitutes the 
 real wealth of the nation, and more respecting the great 
 variety of causes that may affect the supply and demand, 
 and consequently the prices of their articles of trade. 
 
 The dealers in this city are probably as honest as those 
 of any other city in the world. But still there is an 
 abundance of tricks among them. The inexperienced 
 storekeeper, who comes from the interior of the State, 
 or from one of the Western or Southern States, to this 
 city, to buy goods, is very apt to be badly bitten. Such 
 instances as the following are not rare. An inexpe- 
 rienced storekeeper arrives at one of our city hotels. A 
 polite and foppish gentleman introduces himself to him. 
 He treats him to a glass, escorts him to some of the lions 
 of the city, gives him a ticket, and attends him to the 
 theatre. He finally introduces him to one or several 
 
wholesale dealers. The stranger buys his goods from 
 these dealers, not knowing that his new and polite ac- 
 quaintance receives three or four per cent, on all the 
 goods sold him. The first goods shown to a stranger 
 are often offered to him at an exceedingly low rate, 
 merely as a bait to allure him. He is sometimes told 
 that such goods are fashionable and saleable, when they 
 are entirely out of date. A retail dealer often advertises, 
 sometimes by a paper affixed to his window, that he is 
 selling off at cost, or below cost, or that his goods are 
 the cheapest in the city. These notices are most gene- 
 rally deceptive. It is a bad symptom when the dealer 
 sells the same articles at different prices. This is often 
 done even by those who boast of having one price stores. 
 Occasionally merchants sell some articles below cost, 
 merely to draw custom. This is often done by men who 
 have newly opened. This is bad policy, and is rather 
 ungenerous towards others who sell the same articles. 
 In buying a whole piece of calico or other goods, the pur- 
 chaser should see that it has the manufacturer's stamp, 
 with the number of yards. If this be torn off and another 
 card affixed, he has generally to pay for one or two more 
 yards than the manufacturer intended. 
 
 It is a hard lesson for man to learn, that honesty is 
 not only his duty, but that it is also productive of his 
 interest. I have a high moral respect for the upright 
 man of business. It is easier to be generous than to be 
 strictly honest. Generosity is a low quality, a mere im- 
 pulse, compared with the lofty virtue I speak of. It is 
 indeed easier to be a martyr than a man of lofty moral 
 uprightness. From my deepest soul I honor the man 
 who stands amidst all the temptations and interests of 
 trade, firm, disinterested and upright ; him, whose mind 
 his own advantage does not blind or cloud for an in- 
 stant ; who could sit a judge on a question between him- 
 self and his neighbor, just as safely as the purest magis- 
 trate on the bench of justice. Rigid honesty is grand 
 and majestic. 
 
A gentleman wishing to purchase a piano for his wife 
 or daughter, goes to a teacher of music to select one for 
 him. He pays the teacher five dollars for his trouble. 
 The teacher selects one, telling him that it is finely tuned 
 and an excellent instrument. He plays and sings a tune 
 with much feeling and in a charming manner. The 
 gentleman purchases the instrument for four or five hun- 
 dred dollars. He does not know that the teacher re- 
 ceives from the dealer twenty-five or thirty dollars for 
 his recommendation. The piano is probably worth but 
 about one third of the price paid. This species of 
 swindling is conducted in a genteel and musical style. 
 No man should buy goods at auction, unless he is well 
 acquainted with the worth of what he purchases. There 
 are various ways in which advantage is taken in this 
 mode of sale. The auctioneer himself, or one employed 
 for the purpose, frequently bids against the purchaser. 
 When an article is bid up to a certain price, it is not a 
 sure evidence that any one is willing to pay that for it. 
 
 Often do gentlemen and ladies suppose themselves be- 
 decked with rings and chains of gold, when their highly 
 prized ornaments are made out of brass or some baser 
 metal. The genteel wine toper often imagines that he is 
 drinking the champagne of other lands, when he is only 
 gulping down the juice of Jersey apples ; or that he is 
 sipping imported brandy, when he is swallowing trans- 
 muted rye whiskey. Our jewellers and chemists have 
 made many improvements in their arts. Occasionally 
 miserable paintings, mere daubs, are sold at high prices, 
 because they are supposed to be the production of some 
 famous artist, or because they bear sor|te marks of a 
 venerable antiquity. 
 
 Frequently a man engaged in some unprofitable and 
 dishonored business, sells out the "good will" for a 
 handsome sum. His health, he says, requires him to 
 travel southward, and no other inducement would lead 
 him to decline business. As well mig-lit one of the ca- 
 nine species give a good bone of beef to be called mad 
 
6 
 
 dog, as for a man to purchase a " good will," such as he 
 daily sees advertised. As a body, our merchants and 
 traders have a respectable standing, and some of them 
 are truly intelligent, enterprising and upright men. 
 
 LITERATURE AND PERIODICALS. 
 
 We import too much literature from abroad. Much 
 of it is anti-republican and aristocratic in its character 
 and tendency. It is a strange fact that Americans, and 
 even those who cry out most boisterously against foreign 
 influence, generally prefer foreign publications to those 
 of their own land. I would tell the American people, 
 that the foreign publications that circulate among them, 
 are more dangerous to their liberties and morals than all 
 the oppressed men of other soils, that seek protection 
 under the shadow of their eaofle's winsfs. We have indeed 
 received many useful lessons on law and government from 
 other lands ; even their very errors have taught us wis- 
 dom. Much of our knowledge of science and the arts 
 has been imported. It is, indeed, because we are all of 
 foreign origin that we are wiser than the wild Indians of 
 the forest. It is, however, now time for us to strike out 
 a new path for ourselves. We should seek to establish 
 an American national literature, deeply imbued with the 
 spirit of genuine republicanism. Even the novels and 
 other works of fiction brought from beyond the Atlantic, 
 are 'calculated to inculcate anti-democratic principles. 
 Such works, too, as are brought here, are often immoral 
 in their bearing. An international copy-right law would 
 at least tend to check the circulation of these works 
 among us. Few works from abroad, except those on 
 the physical sciences and arts, are suited to benefit Ame- 
 ricans. More encouragement should be given to Ameri- 
 can talent and genius. 
 
 The periodicals published in the United States com- 
 prise a large portion of our literature. Philadelphia does 
 her full share in publishing and sending abroad periodi- 
 
cals. A considerable portion of these are worse than 
 useless to the community. The Saturday Courier, Sa- 
 turday Post, Graham's Magazine, Godey's Lady's Book, 
 et id omne genus, are but little adapted to improve the 
 minds of the people. The two latter are neatly ^o^ up, 
 and their pictures display some skill and taste, and at 
 least may do well to amuse children. But shame on the 
 extolled literature of such papers as those mentioned. 
 Their contents are chiefly miserable imaginative trash. 
 It is remarkable, that many of the trifling and sickly 
 tales of these papers, even when written by Americans, 
 have their scenes laid in Europe, and the hero at last 
 generally stands forth in great dignity, a count, earl, 
 duke, or king. This is surely not democratic or truly 
 American. When the scene is laid in America, the hero 
 generally turns out to be a man of wealth, or a military 
 or civil officer. Such tales do not become a people pro- 
 fessing political equality. These tales seldom inculcate 
 any great moral truth, and have often a pride-engender- 
 ing and debasing tendency. The deep thinkers and 
 really learned men of our country, regard such periodi- 
 cals with something like contempt. Even the editors of 
 other papers, when they write commendatory notices of 
 these periodicals' in their papers, do it with a sly grin of 
 derision. There is little in these periodicals to awaken 
 the deep powers of intellect and to elevate man. 
 
 The partisan political papers of our city are less se- 
 vere and violent in their denunciations of opponents, 
 than political papers generally through the United 
 States. They present to their readers many able articles 
 on law and government. With all their errors, they are 
 of essential service to the welfare of the country. Among 
 the political editors in this city, are men of fine talents 
 and scholarship. Their papers would compare advan- 
 tageously, intellectually considered, with any political 
 papers published in the world. The political sentiments 
 of even the most objectionable of them, are far superior 
 to any published in the old world. There are indeed 
 
s 
 
 many evils resulting from a party spirit. But should 
 party spirit entirely die away, our Republic would fall. 
 Party spirit constitutes a portion of the life and soul of 
 our Republic. 
 
 Neither a book nor a paper of high scientific and lite- 
 rary character, can obtain an extensive circulation among 
 us. It is pleasing, however, to see that a higher literary 
 and scientific taste is gradually progressing among the 
 people. Indeed, I believe that the people now would 
 Avillingly accept of much of a better and deeper cast, than 
 many of our publishers seem to suppose, I think that 
 both our publishers and authors somwhat undervalue 
 the capacities of the reading community. It should be 
 stated to their credit, that the religious papers of our city 
 take a tolerably high stand, not only in morals, but also 
 in science and literature. This is an evidence that re- 
 ligion is the true friend of science and literature. 
 
 It is truly melancholy to behold the vast amount of 
 the husks and poison of literature, that is greedily de- 
 voured in our city. Bishop Onderdonk's trial sells ra- 
 pidly. It admirably gratifies the idle curiosity and 
 impure taste of thousands. The scenes of immodesty 
 and indelicacy depicted in that work give to it its chief 
 attraction and charm. 
 
 EDUCATION IN PHILADELPHIA. 
 
 There is much interest taken by the people of Phila- 
 delphia in the subject of education. The views of the 
 people generally, however, are quite too narrow and 
 hmited on the subject. Education should be regarded 
 as a system of means for developing all the intellectual, 
 moral and physical faculties. In educating youth, our 
 object should be a high and noble one ; to form not 
 merely laborers, or artisans, or storekeepers, but men — ■ 
 full grown men, qualified to discharge aright the duties 
 which they owe to themselves, their neighbors, their 
 country, and their God. 
 
That is a very contracted view of education, which 
 regards it merely as a system of training to quahfy an 
 individual for making money. If all were to become 
 thus grovelhng in their views of education, what an 
 aspect of dull insipidity would society speedily assume ! 
 It would soon relapse into that state of darkness and bar- 
 barism from which it was emancipated about four hun- 
 dred years ago, by the study of higher subjects than 
 those that qualify merely to make money. 
 
 That education is most useful to a man which is most 
 conducive to his happiness. Yet people generally mean 
 by a useful education, such an one as tends to get 
 money ; as if making money were the great end of man's 
 being. That training which fits a man for his trade or 
 profession is deemed useful. The time spent in general 
 education, especially if it interferes with that which ena- 
 bles a man to get his livelihood and make money, is 
 often regarded as thrown away. Yet men' may be very 
 excellent in their trades and professions, and at the same 
 time may be very ignorant, degraded and unhappy. Men 
 should be enabled to spend their time well when with 
 their families, their neighbors, and more particularly 
 when with themselves. General education is required 
 for this purpose. It requires considerable education for 
 a man to enjoy his own company. 
 
 One great object in establishing our public schools, 
 was to prepare the rising generation for becoming intel- 
 ligent citizens of our Republic. Every man in our State 
 entitled to a vote is a legislator. From the people is de- 
 rived all power to make laws. Yet even in our high 
 schools, scarcely any thing is taught of the principles of 
 law and legislation, and of the structure of our own 
 government. Political economy, too, a knowledge of 
 which is essential to form an enlightened citizen, is much 
 neglected. I know well from my own observation, that 
 even the graduates of our high schools would stand but 
 a poor examination on these topics, so important to an 
 American citizen. 
 
 r 
 
10 
 
 Without the least hesitation, the system and mode of 
 education pursued in our public schools may be pro- 
 nounced very defective. The pupils are treated too 
 much as mere machines. They are not thrown suffi- 
 ciently on their own resources, and taught to think and 
 reason for themselves. The plan is too methodical. 
 Knowledge is imparted to the mind, as water is sent 
 into a cistern through a pipe. The worst features in 
 the system have been brought from abroad. It was 
 truly a foolish step to send agents to Europe to obtain 
 information on the subject of instruction. Must we go 
 to despotic governments for light to aid us in guiding 
 aright the children of a republic? I know well that 
 men of distinction have passed high encomiums on the 
 plan of education pursued in Philadelphia; but distin- 
 guished men often err egregiously, and are apt to take 
 pleasure in passing compliments. 
 
 Philadelphia is not more learned or moral than it was 
 twenty years ago. Few of the great men in Philadelphia 
 have been educated in the city. This is no encomium 
 on our schools. There are many temptations in the city 
 to divert the minds of youth from study. One great cause, 
 however, why any of our schools have produced so few 
 good fruits, may be found in the conduct of parents. 
 They do not properly instruct their children at home, 
 nor keep them under due restraint. Wealthy parents, 
 and some too in but moderate circumstances, seem anx- 
 ious to make idle gentlemen^of their sons. They remove 
 the stimulants to industry and enterprise from them. 
 Behold that young man, finely dressed, sporting a cane, 
 extremely polite to all his acquaintances — especially the 
 ladies ! He is quite independent. His father wishes 
 him to be a gentleman. The son uses uncourteous lan- 
 guage to his superiors ; he reads daily an hour or two 
 in some lawyer's or physician's office ; he looks with 
 contempt on the honest apprentice, whose generous soul 
 would outweigh a thousand as light as his own. The 
 companions he chooses are like himself, puffed up with 
 
11 
 
 vanity and swelling with importance. He rides, sails, 
 and attends parties of pleasure. It is plain that such a 
 3^outh must turn out a low, despised and miserable tool. 
 If he escape the penitentiary or gallows, it will be to 
 hang like an incubus on his friends and society. You 
 may meet such young men at every corner in our streets, 
 and at public resorts. To be prosperous as a people, 
 each one must do his part. Parents, rich or not, should 
 not permit their great lubberl)'" boys to hang on them for 
 support. Make them work, either with mind or body. 
 You do them mucli wrong while you dandle them in 
 folly and mature them in extravagance. Let them see 
 that they must depend on themselves, as you have done 
 before them. If your great boys will not work, you 
 should not support them. We want not a nation of idlers 
 and paupers. Drive them away, if they are lazy, and it 
 will be for their good and 5^our honor in the end. Idle- 
 ness and extravagance invariably produce vice and 
 poverty. No matter how many thousands you may be- 
 queath to the indulged idler, be assured he will, in all 
 probability, be a miserable wretch. 
 
 The education in our schools is very superficial. 
 Vearious branches are professedly taught ; but the learner 
 gains but a very imperfect knowledge of any of them. 
 We are too partial to compends and abridgments of 
 science. There is a disposition to learn, as it were, by 
 steam. Not one, out of fifty that pretend to study the 
 French and Italian languages, becomes even tolerably 
 acquainted with those languages. The labor and ex- 
 pense are lost. We need more thorough work in edu- 
 cation. 
 
 Our young ladies finish their education at too early 
 an age, and, by the by, their mothers allow them to 
 marry quite too young. They learn to play one or two 
 tunes on the piano, to sing one or two songs, to produce 
 a ^Qw specimens of painting and drawing, and prattle a 
 few sentences in French, and are counted quite accom- 
 plished ; and at the same time are often quite ignorant. 
 
12 
 
 Their knowledge is no less superficial on the solid 
 branches of education than in the accomplishments. 
 There are but few truly educated and accomplished la- 
 dies among us. Our daughters fly aloft too soon ; their 
 wings tire, and their efforts to waft themselves onward 
 are relaxed. Their education should be deeper, broader, 
 higher, and continued longer. If parents do not educate 
 with reference to making money, it is too apt to be with 
 reference to making a show. 
 
 Philadelphia abounds with many literary societies, 
 with respectable libraries attached. These societies exert 
 but little influence compared with what they should. 
 Proper lectures and other public performances should be 
 more encouraged. There has been a decline in the 
 effective usefulness of these institutions. The theatres 
 and circuses have now greatly the ascendancy. The 
 books in the libraries of the societies are much in want 
 of readers. The literary halls are in a great measure 
 deserted. 
 
 Boyhood and girlhood seem to be extinct in our city. 
 The Philadelphians are all either babies or men and 
 women. The boy resigns the nipple of his mother's 
 breast, that he may put a cigar in his mouth. We see 
 no longer boys at innocent pastimes, but see them as 
 miniature men, dressed up in frock coats, with gloves 
 and canes. Their faces are grave and thoughtful ; the 
 boy struts the man. When a boy apes the man at an 
 early age, he is apt to remain but a boy all his life. The 
 irirls are not allowed to a'ive forth the sensitive and 
 generous impulses of their natures. They are little wo- 
 men ; and their very dolls wear bustles. They are deep 
 in the mysteries of the toilet; they assume a demure 
 air ; they smile and sing methodically. It is wrong and 
 cruel to check the buoyancy and joyous outbreak of 
 these young creatures. Scarcely are they out of their 
 nurses' arms, before their mothers talk to them gravely 
 of husbands. The happy and cheerful days of boyhood 
 and girlhood seem to have fled. When infants begin to 
 
13 
 
 walk, they at once bounce up into manhood and woman- 
 hood. 
 
 We need moderation. The progress of mind is too 
 rapid for human happiness. Parents, treat your boys and 
 girls as such! Keep your eyes upon them! Watch 
 when they go out, and where they go. Keep your boys 
 from the street corners, particularly on the Sabbath. 
 Remember that there is no school of education like the 
 school of home ; and no teacher so powerful, for good 
 or evil, as a parent. It is at home that the better and 
 nobler feelings of the heart are called forth. It is there 
 that patriotism begins. It is there that the energies of 
 the mind are awakened. There is laid the foundation 
 of worth and distinction. No public system of education 
 will avail much in elevating our youth, and producing 
 ornaments to our country, unless parents do their duty. 
 
 I would say to parents, keep your daughters from dis- 
 tant boarding schools, if it is at all convenient for you to 
 have them educated under your own eyes. 
 
 SOCIETY IN HIGH LIFE. 
 
 The doctrine of equality is by no means practically 
 recognized in our city. Distinctions are formed here 
 from the most discreditable reasons. Undoubtedly men 
 will prefer, as their common associates, those with whom 
 they most sympathize. But there is a splitting of society 
 into ranks or castes, by the power of money. Wealth is 
 more effective in elevating a man in society, than virtue 
 or intelligence. To be prosperous is not to be superior, 
 and should form no barrier between men. The only 
 distinctions which should be recognized are those of the 
 soul, of strong principle, of cultivated intellect, of useful- 
 ness. A man, in proportion as he has these claims, should 
 be honored and welcomed every where, A man is worth 
 infinitely more than costume, saloons, equipage, and the 
 show of the universe. He was made to tread all these 
 beneath his feet. The present deference to dress and 
 
14 
 
 upholstery is an insult to humanity ; as if silk-worms 
 and looms, scissors and needles, could produce some- 
 thing nobler than a man. This is a contemptible species 
 of pride, and in no country beneath the sun is it more 
 unbecomin<? than in this land. Shall we break the tie 
 of conmion humanity, and alienate man from his brother, 
 by the force of money? Shall we found a caste on out- 
 ward prosperity, and thus exalt the outward above the 
 inward, the material above the spiritual ? 
 
 A man of wealth, however ignorant, vulgar and pro- 
 fligate he may be, can here mingle witli what is deemed 
 the most genteel society. The influence of wealth 
 reaches the courts of justice. A wealthy man can 
 scarcely be even imprisoned for any crime. He may 
 commit the most foul and deliberate murder, and there 
 is not the most remote probability that he will be hung. 
 In application to the rich, capital punishment is fully 
 abolished. Rarely will a father, however virtuous and 
 religious he may be, refuse the hand of a daughter in 
 marriage to an unprincipled and licentious man, if lie 
 be a man of property. An intelligent and virtuous lady 
 will often marry a vile and abandoned man, for no other 
 cause, it v/ould seem, than his wealth. O gold ! thou 
 dost always triumph, even in a republic ! Who can 
 withstand thee ? Thou leadest the feet of beauty ! The 
 man of business bows obsequiously to thee ! The man 
 of fashion falls before thee, and the miser clutches thy 
 garment as though it were the curtain of Heaven ! 
 
 A work is now published in New York city, which is 
 devoted to the great work of giving information to the 
 public respecting the amount of men's wealth. Such a 
 work would no doubt be well patronized in our city, as 
 the momentous question, Jioio rich is he ? is often anx- 
 iously asked. 
 
 The ladies of Philadelphia, as it regards dress, are 
 under foreign influence. The materials of their dress 
 are chiefly foreign, and also the cut and make. They 
 yield obedience to the law of dress first promulgated in 
 
15 
 
 France by some worthless milliner. They should have 
 spirit and independence enough to establish their own 
 modes of dress. They copy too much after foreigners, 
 and are too much the creatures of mere imitation, to be 
 the daughters of a free and independent republic. They 
 will even deform themselves, that they may follow a 
 foreign rule of foshion. We laugh at the savages, who 
 pull down their ears with weights, who flatten their 
 heads, and wear drum-sticks and human scalps in their 
 noses. But how is their folly greater than that of a well 
 formed lady, who pinches her feet out of all due propor- 
 tions, and presses her well-shaped waist into a waspish 
 and uncouth figure, to oblige an unprincipled French 
 milliner ? They often sacrifice health, and even life, at 
 the shrine of fashion. Fashion, to some extent, regulates 
 their modesty and their blushes. There are exceptions ; 
 but our lovely ladies should all turn aloof from the 
 fashions of a foreign and licentious people. Many of the 
 fashions copied here originate from the personal defor- 
 mities and immodest demeanor of ladies in high but 
 ignoble life in Paris. Think of an American lady 
 making apparently a crooked, humpbacked person of 
 herself, by means of a bustle, simply because a worthless 
 though rich woman in Paris wore a bustle to hide a 
 deformity resulting from disease ! Our ladies should 
 instruct conductors of periodicals to omit the publication 
 of foreign fashions. If our ladies were left to their own 
 judgment and taste, they would exhibit more simplicity 
 and a truer elegance of dress. 
 
 Our fops, who ape after foreign fashions, and wear 
 mustaches and imperials, and long hair hanging down 
 the face and shoulder, cut so absurd and ridiculous a 
 figure, that there is little danger of such fiishions becom- 
 ing general. It is at any rate sometimes useful that pro- 
 minent tokens should indicate wlio are the fools of so- 
 ciety. Tufts of hair above and under the snout answer 
 admirably as badges of this kind of distinction. It is not 
 
16 
 
 now necessary to hire men to act as buflbons, as a suffi- 
 cient number serve gratuitously; 
 
 To uphold the great doctrine of equality, the constitu- 
 tion of the United States forbids a citizen to hold any 
 title of nobility. This seems to be a hard command to 
 the people, as they have fabricated a great variety of 
 honorary names, and make much use of military titles. 
 It is surprising to witness the great attention and de- 
 ference they pay to the titled nobleman of Europe who 
 lands on our shore. The writer speaks from his own 
 personal experience. After he first arrived in this coun- 
 try, he travelled considerably through the United States, 
 and for awhile he retained the title which he bore in 
 the old country. Much deference and even obsequious- 
 ness were manifested towards him. He was pained and 
 astonished. He had thought that the belief in men's 
 equality had taken a deep hold of the minds of Ameri- 
 cans. After he dropped his title and was plain Mr. — , 
 no longer was any high respect paid him. This is an 
 evil that should be corrected. Let the titled nobility of 
 Europe be treated only as common men ; let them see 
 that we are democrats indeed. It is the fashionable up- 
 starts that are quickest in paying such deference. Na- 
 ture's true noblemen never bow low to the titled any 
 where. 
 
 A GLANCE AT CRIMES AND IMPOSITIONS. 
 
 I am not going to write a legal dissertation on crimes ; 
 there is abundance of such writing in our law books. I 
 only wish to throw out a few useful hints on the sub- 
 ject, applicable to Philadelphians. The law guards our 
 property, and is a shield against the assassin's dagger 
 and the midnight incendiary. The mother smiles more 
 confidingly on her infant, when she reflects that a na- 
 tion's arm is pledged for its security. It is the duty of 
 every citizen, not only to obey the law, but to support 
 
17 
 
 and defend it, A man who unites with a mob to destroy 
 property or life, or to commit any outrage, is guilty of 
 one of the most serious crimes, whatever may be the 
 provoking cause. Such a man is more dangerous to the 
 peace and welfare of society than an incarnate devil let 
 loose on earth. I detest the man who would even sym- 
 pathize with a mob under any circumstances. It is the 
 duty of every American citizen sacredly to sustain law. 
 Earth has never seen a despot who rode on a more fiery 
 steed, or swayed a more bloody sceptre, or who trampled 
 upon human rights with a more callous heart than 
 anarchy. No matter what the public excitement — no 
 matter how intense the irritation — that man is indeed 
 suicidal who would let loose the blood-hounds of anarchy 
 for retribution. When these furies sweep the street like 
 the midnight's howling storm, they are variable in the 
 objects of their desolation. Now the brothel is torn to 
 pieces, and now the refined dwelling of piety is sacked 
 and burned. The grog shop blazes to-day — the tem- 
 perance hall to-morrow. The Catholic clergyman is 
 hunted by the mob this week — the Protestant clergyman 
 the next. A Catholic church is wrapped in flames this 
 year — a Protestant church the next. Philadelphia has 
 had frightful and deplorable scenes of mob law. The 
 whole city trembled and stood aghast at the fiendish and 
 bloody doings. There was stern resistance to the au- 
 thorities of the land. Thousands, deemed good citizens 
 before, seemed to say to the furious mob, go on ! Let 
 now the sentiment be as immovable as the eternal gra- 
 nite of the Kocky Mountains, that law must and shall be 
 maintained. Let every true patriot hold himself a vo- 
 lunteer, a minute-man, to defend law, and for her de- 
 fence let him pledge life, fortune, and sacred honor. Let 
 every man who encourages a mob be frowned upon as a 
 traitor to his country. Hereafter let every editor in our 
 city speak out bravely and resolutely, whenever danger 
 threatens, or the storm rages, and not wait till the tem- 
 pest is gone by. 1 know well, from the elements at work, 
 
18 
 
 that men will again try to form mobs in our city, for the 
 purpose of death and devastation. Let us be prepared 
 for them. 
 
 Every man should know that a criminal is punished 
 by our laws for the prevention of crime, and not to gra- 
 tify vindictive feelings. 
 
 It is surprising with what cunning hundreds in our 
 city violate some of our wisest laws, and yet escape de- 
 tection and punishment. We have a severe penalty 
 against selling lottery tickets, yet many are daily sold in 
 our city. Numbers are beggared by the traffic. A se- 
 vere penalty is denounced against gambling ; yet in 
 various houses, and in some in the very vicinity of our 
 halls of justice, money passes from hand to hand through 
 the magic of cards and dice. Men will try their luck at 
 all hazards. Gambling is an absorbing passion, and some 
 men would play on a wife's or a father's grave, or on a 
 dying bed. They will ruin themselves and their fami- 
 lies in spite of the law that would save them. We have 
 a severe law against selling liquor without license ; yet 
 how often is this law violated ? Some^ of our reading- 
 rooms encourage intemperance in a genteel and attractive 
 style. " What will you take V' is there politely said by him 
 who treats. In these rooms, literature and art are made 
 to pay homage to the god Bacchus, the presiding deity. 
 
 Prostitutes and their paramours parade our most fash- 
 ionable streets in pompous array, seeming to take pride 
 in making their true character known. They make their 
 guilty assignments before the eyes and within the hear- 
 ing of the modest wives and daughters of our good citi- 
 zens. The girls of the pave are so numerous, that a vir- 
 tuous female dare scarcely walk our streets alone at 
 night, through fears of being taken for one of the guilty 
 ones, and insulted. 
 
 The crime of seduction is frequently committed in 
 our city without punishment. Ladies, too, of the best 
 standing, smile graciously on the well known seducer. 
 The female who is the victim and the betrayed by perfi- 
 
19 
 
 dy, is ot once forsaken by her sex. They seem to wish 
 to make her destruction sure and complete. Yet the 
 betrayer, the more gniUy one, often receives the cordial 
 smiles of those who frown upon his victim. Shame on 
 them ! When will this cease ? 
 
 Thousands in our city have acted the villain, and in- 
 flicted serious wrongs, through the means of membership 
 in incorporated bodies ; being thus enabled to escape 
 the law, and avoid individual obloquy and disgrace. 
 
 There are various intelligence offices in our city, that 
 take money daily from the poor, and by false directions, 
 send them tramping through the city, sometimes for 
 days, in vain efforts to procure situations. This is a 
 cruel imposition, and worse than direct theft. The con- 
 ductors of our papers should avoid the imputation of 
 aiding and abetting in this crime, by refusing to publish 
 the advertisements of these offices. Persons from the 
 country are often allured by these advertisements. 
 
 Poor woman ! Men drink toasts to her and call her 
 an angel ; but they withhold from her her just rights. 
 Our laws are very unjust towards woman, particularly 
 in married life. The torch of Hymen kindles the fune- 
 ral pile of all a woman's legal rights. With her name 
 her very legal existence is merged in that of her hus- 
 band. The husband becomes master of her person and 
 property. If a man without a dollar marry a lady of 
 personal estate, however large, it is all his at once abso- 
 lutely ; he can squander it all immediately, or run off 
 with it. The wife has no remedy. If the property is not 
 all gone, all she can claim is a bare support. A wife 
 may labor for the support of a drunken husband and her 
 family, yet she cannot even collect her earnings if her 
 husband forbid it. She cannot sue. The husband can 
 take her all according to law. A lady may bring a large 
 personal and real estate to her husband ; if the husband 
 die, the law allows the widow one half of the personal 
 estate, and one third of the real estate ; the remainder, if 
 there are no children, would go to the husband's most 
 
20 
 
 distant relatives rather than to his widow. If the wife 
 die, the husband keeps all, both of the personal and real 
 estate. And this is equal and exact justice to all ! This 
 is elevating woman to an equal condition with man ! — 
 Bah ! Truly man is a tyrant when he has the power; 
 truly man makes the law, and not woman. This law in 
 regard to woman is a disgrace to Pennsylvania. It has 
 been derived from the common law of England, and ori- 
 ginated in a dark and barbarous age, when woman was 
 regarded as the slave of man. I pronounce this law a 
 base imposition. 
 
 Suicide is a crime that seems to be increasing in Phila- 
 delphia, and indeed in all parts of the United States. 
 One man kills himself because he is in pecuniary em- 
 barrassment ; like a base coward, he sneaks out of the 
 w<5rld, and leaves his family in want to buifet against 
 the world without his aid. Another has been jilted and 
 rejected by a young lady, and instead of bidding her a 
 polite good-bye, and trying his luck with another, he kills 
 himself This crime produces disagreeable sensations 
 among relations. It is at best criminal, cowardly, and 
 contemptible for a man to murder himself There is 
 often very bad taste displayed in self-murder. Think of 
 a well dressed gentleman heaving himself from one of 
 the wharves into the Delaware, thereby disfiguring his 
 dress and coming into contact widi filthy objects. It 
 does well enough to drown superfluous puppies and 
 kittens ; but it is very undignified for a man to drown 
 himself To every Philadelphian I would say, whatever 
 you do, do not murder yourself It is well that no man 
 can look on and face the world after committing such a 
 deed. 
 
 FALSE PRETENDERS, IGNORANCE AND CRE- 
 DULITY. 
 
 The clouds of the dark ages still cast a portion of their 
 shadows over our enlightened city. A man may make 
 
21 
 
 the most absurd and ridiculous claims, and yet some in 
 our midst will believe him. Many from our city have 
 become Mormons. Hundreds during the last year, like 
 people in the tenth century, believed that the world was 
 to end. A crowd of genteel men and women fled from 
 our city, thinking it doomed to destruction like Sodom 
 of old, and encamped on the neighboring hills, awaiting 
 old earth's destruction, with robes prepared in which to 
 take their flight. We have several fortune-tellers in our 
 city, and one astrologer, who make a livelihood by our 
 people's credulity. A gentleman in our city, who has 
 done a business to the amount of several hundred thou- 
 sands, one of the all powerful wealthy, had a clock 
 stolen. He went to a fortune-teller, and paid her fifty 
 cents. She told him that at a certain old barn in the 
 vicinity of the city, the thief with the clock might be 
 seen about midnight. He wrapped his cloak around 
 him, and taking a musket in his hand, repaired to the 
 designated barn, and tarried there watching till after the 
 midnight hour, but saw neither thief nor clock. Few 
 have an idea of the number in our city that visit fortune- 
 tellers, and the learned astrologer, Thomas Hague. Some 
 pretend to laugh, and say they go for mere diversion, but 
 they have some faith. Few of our money-loving people 
 would give fifty cents or a dollar to one that lifts the veil 
 of futurity, had they no faith. 
 
 Hundreds in our city, even among the most intelligent, 
 have gaped and stared like simpletons, and have actually 
 believed that a person in a magnetic sleep could exer- 
 cise the attribute of the All-seeing One, and really see 
 objects in far distant rooms. I speak of clairvoyance, 
 a most egregious folly. This foolish pretension has, 
 night after night, drawn crowds. As to the magnetic 
 sleep, there is nothing particularly mysterious about it, 
 nor is it new. 
 
 Numbers of quack physicians, with their wonderful 
 medicines, flourish in our midst. We have purgative 
 medicines, such as Brandreth's and Wright's, that will 
 
22 
 
 cure any disease that originates from an impurity of the 
 blood, and, according to tliem, all diseases originate from 
 this cause. Both these gentlemen should be well dosed 
 with their own pills ; this might purify their consciences. 
 We have Jayne's Scarpa's Oil for all kinds of deafness. 
 What nonsense ! We have various infallible remedies 
 for the consumption. Then we have doctors in mesme- 
 rism, who can see clearly through the whole human 
 system, and tell precisely what may afflict any one. It 
 is a pity that they cannot take a peep into their own 
 brains, and see their own deficiency. We have cold 
 water doctors, who can soak and splash any disease 
 whatever out of a man. We have steam or Thompso- 
 nian doctors, who can heat, sweat, and boil any sick man 
 into health. Then we have a great variety who can 
 cure " certain diseases" in a rapid and genteel manner. 
 The advertisements of these latter speak but poorly for 
 the morals of the community. Are there so many cases 
 of these " certain diseases," that eight or ten physicians 
 can make a living, by devoting their whole attention to 
 them? 
 
 We have men who can make hair grow plentifully on 
 the bald head of an aged man, and can remove all 
 wrinkles from his brow and cheeks ; who can, in short, 
 make the old man young again. 
 
 We live in a wonderful age. What science has burst 
 upon us in the nineteenth century ! The success of igno- 
 rant physicians in our midst, and the extensive sales of 
 their medicines, present evidence to prove that there is 
 much ignorance and credulity in our city. The ad- 
 vertisements of these physicians and their medicines, are 
 highly profitable to publishers. No doubt hundreds in 
 our city are yearly sent to an untimely grave by ignorant 
 physicians and puffed medicines. We have many learn- 
 ed and skillful physicians in our city, to whom we should 
 apply in case of sickness. They seldom advertise. 
 
23 
 
 THEATRES. 
 
 Our city supports four or five theatres. Their influ- 
 ence is very pernicious, and they cost our people yearly 
 many thousands. It has been said, that the theatre 
 might be made a school of morals, but it never has been, 
 and never will be. The immorality and immodesty of 
 the theatre constitute its chief charm. Were sfood morals 
 inculcated on the stage, there would be no attendance. 
 Young ladies hear language on the stage, without blush- 
 ing, which if uttered in presence of their parents, or in a 
 private circle, would dye their cheeks with crimson. 
 They have become accustomed to it, and the example of 
 other ladies leads them to endure such language. They 
 often, too, behold personal exposures on the stage, with- 
 out a blush, which, if exhibited in their family circles, 
 would drive them from the room. Theatres are most 
 undoubtedly of a debasing and corrupt tendency. Let 
 no father who loves good morals, whether he be a Chris- 
 tian or not, ever take a beloved daughter to a theatre. 
 There is less intellectuality now displayed in plays and 
 performers than there was in years past. Very little in- 
 tellectual improvement can be gained at our theatres, to 
 . compensate in any degree for the moral poison imbibed. 
 Seldom have more low buffoonery and outlandish 
 scenes been tolerated on any stage, than are at present 
 in our city. The actors and actresses, with but few ex- 
 ceptions, are immoral and profligate. Their occupation 
 has a tendency to destroy all good principles. The the- 
 atres are the great doorways to the worst dens of ini- 
 quity in our city, and they are well adapted to be such. 
 If our honorable mobs had burnt down our theatres 
 instead of Catholic Churches, they would have done less 
 evil to the city. 
 
 It is dishonorable to our city, and dishonorable to the 
 age, that a prostitute woman, by mere art in dancing 
 and a shameful exposure of person, should there make 
 500 or 1000 dollars in an eveningf, whilst hundreds of 
 
24 
 
 virtuous, intelligent and industrious females in our 
 midst can scarcely, with the greatest efforts of honest 
 labor, earn a livelihood. 
 
 But why do our intelligent and dignified editors so 
 puff and applaud our theatres ? Chiefly, I presume, to 
 make money. Many of their patrons are pleased to read 
 of the theatre, its plays, its actors and its actresses. The 
 managers of theatres, too, advertise extensively in our 
 papers, and give to publishers much job printing. They 
 Are good customers to printing offices ; and then they 
 bestow free tickets, and perhaps other favors. It is no 
 wonder that our papers puff and applaud the theatres. 
 
 
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