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THE PHILOSOPHY 
 
 LAUGHTER AND SMILING. 
 

 ?1 
 
INTELLIGENT, THOUGHTFUL, AND REFLECTING, 
 
 OF EVERY RANK AND STATION, 
 
 THIS LITTLE BOOK 
 
 IS RESPECTFULLY DEDICATED. 
 
PBEFACE. 
 
 Although its subject is laughter, the pre- 
 sent volume is by no means a jest-book. 
 Quite the contrary. In the following pages 
 this subject is investigated carefully and 
 elaborately, and with all the seriousness and 
 gravity becoming a scientific or philosophi- 
 cal inquiry. 
 
 The phenomenon of laughter is brought 
 into the field of vision in all its most impor- 
 tant phases — anatomical, physiological, in- 
 tellectual, and moral, by which it will be 
 perceived that the subject of laughter is 
 <c no laughing matter." 
 
viii Preface. 
 
 It must, however, be confessed that, not- 
 withstanding a considerable amount both of 
 time and labour has been expended in the 
 composition of the following essay, it is yet 
 only a rough outline of this very important 
 and interesting subject, which may, by 
 further elaboration — (if time and oppor- 
 tunity permit) — be wrought out into a 
 much more complete treatise. 
 
 I shall, nevertheless, have accomplished 
 my present object if I merely succeed in 
 drawing public attention to the facts which 
 I have brought forward, and to the great 
 probability of the inferences which I have 
 ventured to suggest, so as to induce the 
 intelligent and observing to give them a 
 due amount of consideration. 
 
 Next in importance to those who have 
 been the means of establishing truths 
 worthy of acceptance, may be ranked those 
 
Preface. ix 
 
 who discover and point out opinions worthy 
 of examination. 
 
 In making these few prefatory remarks 
 I feel forcibly prompted to deprecate that 
 particular amount of adverse criticism 
 which, under ordinary circumstances, might 
 fairly be applied to several parts of the fol- 
 lowing sketch. I allude to the many repe- 
 titions which I have thought it necessary 
 to make in illustration of my theory. 
 
 I have no doubt that this tautology will 
 be condemned in the most emphatic manner 
 by many of my readers who are blessed with 
 retentive memories, and who read carefully - y 
 but the great majority of readers do not 
 possess these important qualifications. 
 
 Moreover, I may be allowed to state that 
 my theme is so entirely novel — I may say 
 unique — and the opinions which I have 
 ventured to advance are so diametrically 
 
x Preface. 
 
 opposed to those which are universally 
 entertained on the subject, that I felt com- 
 pelled, in justice to my argument, to make 
 use of considerable reiteration. 
 
 If I need further exculpation, I can safely 
 shelter myself under the authority and 
 example of no less a dignitary than the 
 famous Archbishop Fenelon. 
 
 On one occasion this great man was 
 at a large party, in which were several 
 superficial critics, who gave utterance to 
 some rather depreciating remarks on the 
 Archbishop having repeated himself in cer- 
 tain of his literary productions. 
 
 He modestly requested to have the pas- 
 sages pointed out to which allusion had been 
 made. This was very readily done. " Ah," 
 said he, "I perceive you recollect the pas- 
 sages ; and that they might be recollected teas 
 my reason for repeating them'' 
 
Preface. xi 
 
 I respectfully request tlie reader to bear 
 this in mind. 
 
 The principal illustrations have been exe- 
 cuted by the Brothers Taylor, so well known 
 as first-rate portrait-engravers. Their excel- 
 lence requires no eulogium. 
 
 G. VASEY. 
 May, 1875. 
 
TABLE OF CONTENTS. 
 
 PAGE. 
 
 Preface vii 
 
 Introduction 17 
 
 CHAPTEE I. 
 
 First — On the pecuniary expense of laughter. 
 Second — On those who are enriched by it. 
 Third — On its imagined advantages and 
 benefits 23 
 
 CHAPTER II. 
 
 First — On the organs involved in the action of 
 laughter. Second — On the means by which 
 he habit of laughing is induced. Third — On 
 the state of feeling to which it gives rise. . 27 
 
xiv Contents. 
 
 CHAPTER III. 
 
 Further observations on the means employed to 
 produce what is termed laughter in infants, 
 and on the injurious effects which result 
 therefrom 31 
 
 CHAPTER IV. 
 
 On the distinction between voluntary actions 
 and those that are involuntary, with a refe- 
 rence to the organs which are employed 
 to produce them . . . . . .36 
 
 CHAPTER V. 
 
 Descriptive of the physical effects of laughter 
 on the organs of respiration . . . .40 
 
 CHAPTER VI. 
 
 Is it a confirmed fact (as is universally asserted) 
 that laughter is an original instinct? In 
 other words, Is man really a laughing 
 animal? 42 
 
Contents. xv 
 
 CHAPTER VII. 
 
 On the relation of laughter to wit . . .51 
 
 CHAPTER VIII. 
 
 On the logical relation of the action of laughter 
 to the ideas, objects, or actions which excite 
 laughter 55 
 
 CHAPTER IX. 
 
 On the criterion by which to distinguish natural 
 or instinctive actions and habits from those 
 which are acquired . . . . .59 
 
 CHAPTER X. 
 
 On the intellectual and moral status of the 
 ordinary incentives to laughter . . .61 
 
 CHAPTER XI. 
 
 On the moral and intellectual characteristics of 
 those who are addicted to laughing . . 65 
 
xvi Contents. 
 
 CHAPTEE XII. 
 
 Are laughter and joking, badinage and fun, 
 consistent with dignity of character ? or are 
 they conducive to the maintenance of a 
 beneficial political or social influence ? . 68 
 
 CHAPTER XIII. 
 
 The verdict of Shalispeare on the moral 
 character of laughter . . . . .73 
 
 CHAPTER XIV. 
 
 A brief comparison between gravity and levity 
 — the grave and the gay. — Have we any rule 
 to direct us in the exercise of laughter? . 77 
 
 CHAPTER XV. 
 
 On the degrading and vicious consequences of 
 the habit of laughing 79 
 
Contents. xvii 
 
 CHAPTER XYI. 
 
 On the injurious effects of nursery rhymes and 
 juvenile literature in stultifying the minds of 
 children and youths by furnishing them with 
 extravagant lies and egregious nonsense to 
 excite their wonder and induce them to laugh 83 
 
 CHAPTER XVII. 
 
 A venial digression touching the false and im- 
 perfect methods now in vogue of teaching and 
 training the young 87 
 
 CHAPTER XVIII. 
 
 Milton versus Shakspeare on the subject of 
 laughter 90 
 
 CHAPTER XIX. 
 
 A comparison between those sayings and doings 
 which are laughed at and those which are not 
 
 laughed at 94 
 
 b 
 
xviii Contents 
 
 CHAPTER XX. 
 
 The character of Laughers compared with the 
 character of those who are thoughtful and 
 serious . . . . . .97 
 
 CHAPTEE XXL 
 
 Classification of Laughs and Smiles . . 100 
 
 CHAPTEE XXII. 
 
 On the broad line of demarcation which sepa- 
 rates laughter from smiling . . . . 104 
 
 CHAPTEE XXIII. 
 
 Further illustrations of the distinction between 
 a laugh and a smile ..... 113 
 
 CHAPTEE XXIV. 
 
 Is it a fact (as is generally affirmed) that those 
 who are accustomed to laugh are good- 
 tempered, generous, and philanthropic ? And, 
 on the contrary, that those who seldom or 
 never laugh are gloomy, repulsive, and mis- 
 anthropic characters who ought to be sus- 
 pected and shunned ? 129 
 
Contents. xix 
 
 APPENDIX, 
 
 COLLATERAL AND EXPLANATORY. 
 
 SECTION I. 
 
 PAGE. 
 
 On the various species of tickling, physical, 
 intellectual, and moral . . . . .145 
 
 SECTION 11/ 
 
 Kemarks on the effects of physical tickling. — 
 Quoted from a French cyclopaedia . . 149 
 
 SECTION III. 
 
 On the extremely horrible and agonising condi- 
 tion to which a human being can be reduced 
 by systematic tickling 151 
 
 SECTION IV. 
 
 On Mr. Darwin's opinion respecting laughter . 161 
 
INTRODUCTION. 
 
 It will be freely granted by all those who 
 observe and reflect that every community of 
 human beings (more especially those which 
 consider themselves civilised) practise a 
 thousand habits, and entertain ten thousand 
 opinions, of which they can give no rational 
 account. 
 
 This, however, will cease to excite our 
 astonishment when we consider that all the 
 knowledge we receive, as well as all the 
 habits we contract, are received and con- 
 tracted with the most unreserved confidence, 
 without doubting, questioning, or even re- 
 flecting. 
 
18 Introduction. 
 
 Be it observed, moreover, that the 
 mechanical parrot - and - monkey training 
 which is now so universal is commenced 
 and incessantly persevered in, long before 
 we are at all capable of discriminating be- 
 tween that which is good and that which is 
 evil — between that which is true and that 
 which is false — and, consequently, before we 
 are able to judge or determine whether the 
 knowledge which we are receiving, and the 
 habits we are acquiring, are true and bene- 
 ficial or false and injurious. 
 
 Under these unfavourable circumstances 
 we would suggest that one of the happiest, 
 as well as one of the most important, ideas 
 which can enter the minds of those who are 
 earnestly endeavouring to acquire true know- 
 ledge (after having been instructed in the 
 ordinary routine methods) is that of review- 
 ing all their previously- acquired knowledge, 
 
Introduction. 19 
 
 of doubting and questioning whether or not 
 they have been properly taught, and of de- 
 termining boldly, but carefully, to investi- 
 gate the truth for themselves. 
 
 In this self-investigation we undoubtedly 
 labour under a very great disadvantage— 
 namely, that of being imbued and sur- 
 rounded by a host of prejudices — in other 
 words, of judgments formed without exa- 
 mination — and these it behoves us abso- 
 lutely to renounce if we sincerely desire to 
 obtain clear, distinct, and correct know- 
 ledge. 
 
 To enable us to overcome this difficulty 
 in the most effectual manner (after having 
 acquired some amount of experience and 
 judgment), we must, in the first place, care- 
 fully take stock of all our kinds and degrees 
 of knowledge, and give them a thorough 
 revision. 
 
20 Introduction. 
 
 In the second place, we must entirely 
 banish those principles and habits which we 
 discover to be false, superstitious, or preju- 
 dicial, and retain only such as we find on 
 examination to be true in principle and 
 beneficial in practice. 
 
 Moreover, we must bear in mind that our 
 social and domestic habits are invariably the 
 result of public opinion, and we must never 
 forget that public opinion is chiefly founded 
 on ignorance or very imperfect knowledge, the 
 result of which is that our daily habits are 
 frequently of the most injurious character ; 
 bear witness the misery, the vice, the folly, 
 the crime which unfortunately ramify through 
 all classes of society, the great mass of which 
 evils is the consequence of a grossly ignorant 
 public opinion. 
 
 The present essay is a humble but earnest 
 attempt to investigate the nature and ques- 
 
Introduction. 21 
 
 tion the propriety of opinions which are all 
 but universal upon the subject of a habit 
 which is extremely prevalent, and which, in 
 Christendom at least, is regarded with 
 unanimous complacence and approbation. 
 
 It must not be supposed for a moment 
 that the Author has the most distant idea of 
 effecting, by means of the following essay, 
 any intellectual or moral revolution ; but he 
 feels tolerably confident that his suggestions 
 will excite in the minds of the thoughtful a 
 persistent train of rational reflection. 
 
THE PHILOSOPHY 
 
 OF 
 
 LAUGHTER AND SMILING. 
 
 CHAPTEE I. 
 
 First — On the pecuniary expense of laughter. Second 
 — On those who are enriched by it. Third — On 
 its imagined advantages and benefits. 
 
 1. It is assuredly a great fact, which can- 
 not be gainsayed, that an immense majority 
 of the inhabitants of most civilised countries 
 hold the habit of laughing in such high esti- 
 mation, and feel such a craving for the exer- 
 cise of it, that collectively they expend vast 
 sums of money in procuring the stimulus 
 necessary to produce its action. 
 
24 The Philosophy of 
 
 2. This golden harvest finds its way into 
 the pockets of those highly-gifted indi- 
 viduals who have acquired the happy knack 
 of writing, or mouthing and spouting, those 
 facetious words, or of performing those gro- 
 tesque actions, which have the magical 
 power of contracting our cheeks into 
 wrinkles, and distending our jugular veins. 
 
 3. All our comic and farcical writers, 
 from Wycherly, Farquhar, Smollett, and 
 the like, down to Punch, Fun, and Figaro, 
 have realised princely incomes by their 
 successful efforts in stimulating the pectoral 
 muscles and shaking the diaphragms of their 
 numerous readers. 
 
 4. All our clowns and buffoons and comic 
 singers have found out a most effectual 
 method of ''raising the wind" simply by 
 " raising a laugh. 5 ' 
 
 5. The inhabitants of London alone 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 25 
 
 spend many thousands of pounds annually 
 to support in ease and elegance those dex- 
 terous and ingenious eccentrics whose only 
 business it is to make their auditors or 
 spectators laugh. 
 
 6. In former times to keep one fool to 
 provoke laughter was considered so choice a 
 luxury as only to be indulged in by a king. 
 At the present time the common people can 
 afford to keep some hundreds. 
 
 7. Whereas formerly it was regarded as a 
 rare luxury, it is now looked upon as an 
 absolute necessary of life. "Witness the 
 multiplicity of our hebdominal facetiae ; 
 witness our Alhambras, our Oxfords, and a 
 thousand other similar rendezvous of inferior 
 notoriety, the managers of which are eagerly 
 striving to rival and eclipse each other in 
 their efforts to screw the nerves of their 
 audiences up to the laughing pitch. 
 
26 The Philosophy of 
 
 8. He who excites the greatest amount of 
 laughter in a given time, either by his pen, 
 his pencil, his tongue, or his grimaces and 
 "buffoonery, is considered the reigning favou- 
 rite pro iem. ; he is greeted with the loudest 
 plaudits, and, what is of still more import- 
 ance to him, he receives the greatest pecu- 
 niary reward. 
 
 9. Indeed, laughter is generally thought 
 to be so natural, so cheerful, so convivial, so 
 exhilarating, nay, even so healthy, that the 
 monitorial proverb of " laugh and grow fat" 
 has become as " familiar in our mouths as 
 household words." 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 27 
 
 CHAPTER II. 
 
 First — On the organs involved in the action of 
 laughter. Second — On the means by which the 
 habit of laughing is induced. Third — On the 
 state of feeling to which it gives rise. 
 
 1. What is the physical mechanism by 
 which this remarkable convulsion is gene- 
 rated ? What are the organs by which the 
 phenomenon of laughter is produced ? And 
 by what stimuli or agency are they put inta 
 motion ? 
 
 2. One of the older anatomists, in a 
 Treatise, " De Bisa," gives the following 
 account of the mechanism of laughter : — 
 
 3. " No animal," says he, " except man, 
 is so capable of being tickled, which is occa- 
 
28 The Philosophy of 
 
 sioned by their not having the papillae of 
 the nerves so exposed as they are in the 
 human species, in whom these papillae lie 
 very superficially, especially about the sides 
 of the chest. As these nerves communicate 
 with the nerves which give motion to the 
 muscles of breathing, whenever they are 
 irritated by being tickled, their vibrations 
 are propagated to the communicating nerves, 
 which throws the muscles of breathing into 
 short, quick, and convulsive motions, which 
 is the action of laughter." 
 
 4. Now it cannot fail to have been ob- 
 served — and that repeatedly — by all those 
 who are not absolutely blind, or mentally 
 deficient, that the operation of tickling is 
 invariably commenced at a very early period 
 of infancy, and children are thus taught and 
 accustomed to laugh even before they have 
 begun to think. 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 29 
 
 5. Thus they learn to laugh, not because 
 they like it, or because they are pleased, but 
 solely because they are tickled; and the 
 association of tickling and laughing is so 
 intimate, and so instantaneous, that children 
 actually begin to laugh even when they 
 merely see the hand of another approaching 
 with the apparent intention of tickling them. 
 
 6. Moreover, we may remark, en passant \ 
 that there are very many habits of an evil 
 and injurious tendency to which children are 
 introduced so gradually, so imperceptibly, 
 and at so very early an age, that the means 
 by which these habits have been formed are 
 altogether overlooked or forgotten, and the 
 habits are regarded, by the superficial and 
 unreflecting, as being perfectly natural and 
 original instincts. 
 
 7. Moreover, from the circumstance of 
 their having been acquired so very early in 
 
30 The Philosophy of 
 
 life, they become, in most cases, fixed and 
 inveterate. Such is the case with the habit 
 of laughing. 
 
 8. When we arrive at a capacity of re- 
 flecting upon our sensations we perceive, in 
 the operation of laughter, a ridiculous and 
 absurd kind of feeling, which we find it 
 difficult to refer to the class of either plea- 
 sure or pain. 
 
 9. It may fairly be described as an 
 amphibious sort of sensation, a vague inde- 
 finite state of tantalising pleasure in the 
 very act of transforming itself into a state 
 of painful annoyance, and from which we 
 use our utmost endeavours to extricate our- 
 selves as quickly as possible. 
 
 10. It is very questionable that children 
 would ever begin to laugh if they were not 
 stimulated or prompted, but were let alone, 
 and treated naturally and rationally. 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 31 
 
 CHAPTEE III. 
 
 Further observations on the means employed to 
 produce what is termed laughter in infants, 
 and on the injurious effects which result there- 
 from. 
 
 1. It will be perfectly manifest to any 
 one who will patiently and carefully and 
 perseveringly make the requisite observa- 
 tions that infants never do exhibit those 
 gaspings of breath, accompanied by the com- 
 pulsory and convulsive ejaculations, which we 
 <}omplaisantly term laughter, and which we 
 fondly imagine are the voluntary expressions 
 of pleasure, except at the instigation of the 
 nurse or the parent, who jostles or jerks them 
 ^about, or squeezes them or tickles them, or 
 
32 The Philosophy of 
 
 suddenly places some glaring or striking 
 object before them, or some one jumps about, 
 making grotesque or ridiculous motions, 
 or abrupt or shrill noises, all of which 
 annoyances are incessantly inflicted upon 
 the great majority of helpless little infants. 
 
 2. These absurd and preposterous antics 
 very naturally startle and frighten the little 
 vacant-minded creatures, and excite the 
 diaphragm and pectoral muscles into spas- 
 modic action, the result of which is convul- 
 sive gaspings for breath. 
 
 3. These gaspings for breath gradually 
 become more energetic and vocal, and 
 ultimately result in those reiterated and 
 continued jerkings and heavings of the 
 chest which the parents and nurses foolishly 
 imagine to be manifestations of pleasure and 
 delight, but which, in fact, are nothing more 
 nor less than spasmodic and involuntary con- 
 
A Mother with her Child in her Arms and its Big Sister giggling at it 
 and tickling it to make it laugh. 
 
 Loquitur, Fond Mother (Scottice Daft Mither) — " When will my 
 darling ducky begin to laugh ?" Big Sister — " Oh, I'll teach him to 
 laugh — I'll tickle his little ribs for him, and then he'll soon begin to 
 laugh ! Won't you, baby dear ?" 
 

Laughter and Smiling. 33 
 
 tractions and dilatations of the pectoral 
 muscles and the lungs, excited into action 
 by those absurd ticklings and stupid 
 monkey tricks which have just been 
 enumerated. (See Engraving.) 
 
 4. These irrational pranks by mothers and 
 nurses are practised so frequently and so 
 persistently, and are so invariably and in- 
 stantaneously followed by the same spas- 
 modic action of the diaphragm and lungs, 
 that the association of these very foolish 
 and vulgar tricks with the immediate 
 agitation of the breathing apparatus ulti- 
 mately becomes a fixed and permanent 
 association, and continues to influence the 
 manners of most individuals through the 
 whole course of their lives. 
 
 5. Furthermore, these absurd and stupid 
 excitements are not only unnecessary and 
 vulgar, they are positively mischievous, pro- 
 
34 The Philosophy of 
 
 ducing effects which are invariably injurious, 
 and sometimes fatal. 
 
 6. If these fantastic and insane antics 
 were never practised upon infants, it is 
 morally certain that they would never 
 acquire that tendency to those convulsive 
 twitchings which we denominate laughter, 
 and which, doubtless, in innumerable in- 
 stances, bring on those convulsive fits which 
 children are so subject to, and which, not 
 unfrequently, end in death. 
 
 7. Those fits of laughter which are com- 
 monly called hearty (but which might more 
 appropriately be termed violent) are always 
 constrained, never spontaneous. 
 
 8. Fits of laughter never put the body 
 into a pleasant or comfortable state, and we 
 invariably endeavour to put a stop to a fit 
 of laughter as speedily as possible. 
 
 9. Coughing is a convulsion somewhat 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 35 
 
 allied to laughing ; they seem to be two 
 species of the same genus : a fit of laughing 
 frequently terminates in a fit of coughing. 
 
 10. The physiological fact is that cough- 
 ing and laughing are both performed by the 
 same important organs, and they both have 
 ■a very similar influence on the lungs and 
 brain, and that influence is always of a 
 painful and inj urious character. 
 
36 The Philosophy of 
 
 CHAPTER IV. 
 
 On the distinction between voluntary actions and 
 those that are involuntary, with a reference to 
 the organs which are employed to produce 
 them. 
 
 1. To enable us more clearly to under- 
 stand the nature and operation of the phe- 
 nomenon of laughter, let us briefly refer to 
 the well-known fact that some actions are 
 voluntary, while others are involuntary. 
 Our present investigation requires that we 
 should carefully distinguish the different 
 natures of those two species of action. 
 
 2. For example, speaking and walking 
 are voluntary actions. We can walk when 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 37 
 
 we feel inclined, and we can talk when we 
 desire to do so. 
 
 3. But sneezing is an involuntary act, as 
 also is coughing ; and so is any kind of con- 
 vulsion. Breathing is likewise an involun- 
 tary act, and this function is performed by 
 means of the pectoral muscles and the dia- 
 phragm, which are regularly stimulated by 
 the atmospheric air which passes down the 
 trachea into the lungs. 
 
 4. Now if we observe the very com- 
 mencement of those actions which are uni- 
 versally acknowledged to be natural and 
 voluntary, we find that they never require 
 any artificial or external stimulus to induce 
 or provoke their manifestations. 
 
 5. For instance, all healthy children have 
 a natural and instinctive tendency to move 
 their arms and legs, and to kick and sprawl 
 about in every possible direction, quite 
 
38 The Philosophy of 
 
 spontaneously, and without any instigation 
 or external prompting whatever. 
 
 6. In like manner, their vocal organs are 
 naturally prone to action, and thus they 
 begin to utter their first simple articulations 
 of "mamma," "babba," and other similar 
 elementary sounds, and these operations are 
 performed (as we may readily observe) quite 
 spontaneously, and without any extraneous 
 impulse. 
 
 7. Now, everybody knows that the legs 
 and arms, as well as the vocal organs, belong 
 to the voluntary system, or that system of 
 organs which is under the influence of the 
 will. 
 
 8. But the diaphragm and the pectoral 
 muscles (which, besides being the organs 
 connected with the essential function of 
 breathing, are likewise the organs which are 
 concerned in producing laughter) are not 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 39 
 
 voluntary, but only act involuntarily from 
 the natural stimulus of the atmosphere upon 
 the lungs, the result of which is respiration. 
 9. It is . extremely improbable (indeed, 
 almost impossible) that these involuntary 
 organs — namely, the pectoral muscles and 
 the diaphragm — would start into convulsion 
 (which they assuredly do in the act of 
 laughing) unless they were acted upon by 
 an unnatural and improper stimulus. 
 
40 The Philosophy of 
 
 CHAPTER V, 
 
 Descriptive of the physical effects of laughter on 
 the organs of respiration. 
 
 1. In the paroxysm of laughter the lungs 
 are dilated, and so they remain till the 
 cause ceases. But while the fit of laughter 
 continues the blood cannot be transmitted 
 freely and naturally through the lungs. 
 
 2. Hence we can readily account for the 
 redness and swelling of the neck, face, and 
 head during a fit of laughter. The blood, 
 not being allowed to pursue its course through 
 the lungs, is unnaturally and dangerously 
 retarded in the veins and arteries, and thus 
 causes the redness in the neck, face, and 
 head. 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 41 
 
 3. If the passage through the lungs be 
 impeded for more than a few seconds the 
 brain becomes congested, apoplexy ensues, 
 and in very many cases ends fatally. 
 
 4. Numerous instances are on record in 
 which violent straining and fits of coughing, 
 which have been attended with a full and 
 long- continued inspiration, have terminated 
 in the same fatal manner. 
 
42 The Philosophy of 
 
 CHAPTER VI. 
 
 Is it a confirmed fact (as is universally asserted) 
 that laughter is an original instinct ? In other 
 words, Is man really a laughing animal ? 
 
 1. Having briefly described the anatomy 
 and physiology of laughter, and its patho- 
 logical action, let us now inquire if universal 
 experience can be brought forward to prove 
 that mankind are naturally stimulated to 
 laugh. 
 
 2 . It has been affirmed ten thousand times, 
 and is, moreover, firmly and universally 
 believed, that man is naturally a laughing 
 animal, and that it is one of his original and 
 peculiar instincts to laugh. 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 43 
 
 3. Upon a mature consideration, however, 
 this assertion appears to be very doubtful. 
 
 4. It is certainly a fact that this notion 
 has always prevailed, and its truth has 
 always been taken for granted : no one has 
 even questioned it ; consequently, no evidence 
 has ever been set forth in its defence. 
 
 5. The bold assertion has gone forth that 
 man is a laughing animal, and straightway, 
 in all ages, it has received the most popular 
 sanction. 
 
 6. Nevertheless it still remains an open 
 question, and we are now in a position to 
 state that many facts and arguments are 
 ready to be marshalled in order to show 
 that the only foundations upon which this, 
 inveterate opinion has been so long supported, 
 are popular ignorance and that childish 
 credulity which is ever the handmaid of 
 ignorance. 
 
44 The Philosophy of 
 
 7. Anatomical and physiological facts 
 have already been adduced to show that 
 laughter is not the spontaneous and in- 
 stinctive function of the organs which are 
 engaged to produce it, and that they must 
 be stimulated by some influence, which, 
 obviously, is neither rational nor grateful. 
 
 8. Moreover, the following enumeration 
 of facts will, we feel confident, satisfactorily 
 prove that the habit of laughing is by no 
 means universal among mankind. It is 
 extremely important to keep this in view. 
 
 9. For if the act of laughing were truly 
 one of man's natural functions, it would be 
 universal : all the inhabitants of every coun- 
 try, whether savage or civilised, would in- 
 variably exercise the faculty. 
 
 10. We at once acknowledge the obvious 
 fact that an immense number of human 
 beings do laugh, but these are principally 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 45 
 
 restricted to those countries where what is 
 called civilisation has made considerable 
 progress — where vice and dissipation and 
 all manner of crime abound ; and, above all, 
 where levity and frivolity, and every species 
 of folly, constitute the predominant cha- 
 racteristics of the inhabitants, as in England 
 at the present day, to a very great extent, 
 and in France to a very much greater. 
 
 11. In such communities the habit of 
 laughing is very prevalent, but it is by no 
 means universal even in those countries. 
 
 12. On the other hand it ig equally true 
 that in all zmcivilised tribes, among whom 
 vice and crime are comparatively rare — 
 where levity and frivolity are never seen, 
 and where the manners of the people are 
 simple and unsophisticated — in such com- 
 munities laughter may be said to be entirely 
 unknown. 
 
46 The Philosophy of 
 
 13. The mothers among these savage 
 tribes never descend to the excessive puerility 
 of tickling or otherwise stimulating their 
 children during infancy. They have no 
 follies, or absurdities, or vices to laugh at — 
 consequently they never laugh. 
 
 14. Look at the North American In- 
 dians, especially before they were contami- 
 nated by intercourse with Europeans, and 
 when their only crime was that of war, which 
 they practised in common with the inhabi- 
 tants of all civilised and Christian nations. 
 
 15. By the united testimony of those 
 Europeans who have travelled among them 
 we learn that the North American Indians 
 never discompose their features by laughter ; 
 •and this has been corroborated by the writer's 
 personal experience. 
 
 16. They naturally preserve a stoical and 
 unvarying equanimity. They neither laugh 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 47 
 
 nor cry. They are imperturbable under every 
 vicissitude. These are the true and genuine 
 characteristics of the uncivilised North 
 American Indians. 
 
 17. In an interesting and very important 
 little book, entitled Shut Your Mouth, written 
 by Greorge Catlin, who travelled for many 
 years among those Indians, he makes the 
 following remarks : — " Civilised people, who 
 from their education are more excitable, re- 
 garding amusing or alarming scenes with 
 the mouth open, as in wonder, astonishment, 
 delight, listening, &c. ; and in laughing, 
 drawing pleasure through their teeth, by 
 which they insure pain for themselves in 
 their sober moments, and for their teeth 
 diseases of decay which no dentist can 
 <mre. 
 
 "The savage, without the change of a 
 muscle on his face, listens to the rumbling 
 
48 The Philosophy of 
 
 of the earthquake, or the thunder's crash, 
 with his hand over his mouth ; and if by 
 the extreme of any other excitement he is 
 forced to laugh, his mouth is invariably 
 hidden in the same manner. " 
 
 18. Here we must observe that what is 
 said to be an Indian's laugh is a mere 
 ejaculation, or sudden emission of breath, 
 and exhibits no similarity to the laugh of 
 the European. The Indian smiles, but he 
 never laughs, according to the meaning of 
 that term as understood among civilised 
 people. 
 
 19. Again, if we visit the Southern 
 Hemisphere, and direct our attention to the 
 New Zealanders, we find the same remarks 
 are equally applicable to those aborigines. 
 They had not, when first discovered by early 
 navigators, acquired the habit of spasmodi- 
 cally agitating the diaphragm, and thereby 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 4& 
 
 distorting the countenance with hideous 
 wrinkles. 
 
 20. Nevertheless, it cannot be denied that 
 both the North American Indians and the 
 New Zealanders are well-organised human 
 beings, and possess considerable intellectual 
 powers. 
 
 21. Among civilised nations, also, there 
 are several who have not yet entered into 
 the laughing stage of humanity. 
 
 22. The Hindoos and Arabs are highly 
 intellectual races, yet laughing is an accom- 
 plishment which has never been cultivated 
 among them. 
 
 23. The Egyptians, the Turks, and the 
 Spaniards are by no means prone to the 
 exercise of risible muscles. 
 
 24. Among the ancient Greeks and 
 Romans laughing was not regarded either 
 as dignified or graceful. 
 
50 The Philosophy of 
 
 25. The wit of their poets and satirists 
 was both acute and refined, exciting admira- 
 tion and pleasure, but very rarely had the 
 effect of throwing their respiratory apparatus 
 into convulsions. 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 51 
 
 CHAPTER VII. 
 
 On the relation of laughter to wit. 
 
 1. Gteoiige Combe (in his System, of 
 Phrenology), in describing wit, observes : — 
 
 u There may be much excellent wit with- 
 out exciting us to laugh.. Indeed, Lord 
 Chesterfield lays it down as a characteristic 
 feature of an accomplished gentleman that 
 he should never laugh. 
 
 2. It is quite certain that there may be 
 a high enjoyment of wit without laughter. 
 
 3. The following are instances in point : — 
 
 4. There is a story of a Nottingham 
 publican, whose name was Littlejohn, who 
 put up the figure of Eobin Hood for a sign 
 with the following inscription :— - 
 
52 The Philosophy of 
 
 " All ye that relish ale that's good 
 Come in and drink with Eobin Hood ; 
 If Eobin Hood is not at home, 
 Come in and drink with Little John/' 
 
 5. This is genuine wit, which even 
 Chesterfield would allow to be so ; and yet 
 it does not force us to laugh. 
 
 6. Another instance is the following : — 
 
 7. Louis the Fifteenth once heard that an 
 Englishman (Lord Stair) at his court was 
 remarkably like himself. 
 
 8. Upon his going to court, the king, 
 who was very guilty of saying rude things, 
 observed, upon seeing him — " A remarkable 
 likeness, upon my word. My Lord, was 
 your mother ever in France ?" 
 
 9. To which his lordship replied, with 
 great politeness — " No, please your majesty, 
 but my father was." 
 
 10. This was admirably witty, but it does 
 not excite laughter. 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 53 
 
 11. Again: in the following instance 
 tlie risible muscles are affected, although, in 
 fact, the real point of wit contained in it is 
 infinitely less. 
 
 12. The story of the Nottingham publi- 
 can, named Littlejohn, who set up the sign 
 of Eobin Hood, goes on to say that Mr. Little- 
 john having died, his successor thought it 
 a pity to lose so capital a sign and so much 
 good poetry, and accordingly retained them 
 both, only, erasing his predecessor's name, 
 he substituted his own instead. 
 
 13. The lines then ran thus : — 
 
 " All ye that relish ale that's good, 
 Come in and drink with Eobin Hood ; 
 If Eobin Hood is not at home, 
 Come in and drink with Samuel Johnson." 
 
 14. The whole wit is now gone, and yet 
 it irresistibly excites laughter. 
 
 15. In fact, the ideas have lost all co- 
 
54 The Philosophy of 
 
 herence, and the wit has been transmuted 
 into a limping, incongruous doggrel. It has 
 become simply ridiculous — hence a subject 
 for laughter. 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 55 
 
 CHAPTEE VIII. 
 
 On the logical relation of tlie action of laughter 
 to the ideas, objects, or actions which excite 
 laughter. 
 
 1. If laughter were instinctive, and con- 
 sequently natural, there would doubtless be 
 a natural and obvious relation between the 
 laughter and the object or action which 
 gives rise to the laugh, on the well-under- 
 stood relation which subsists between cause 
 and effect. 
 
 2. That is to say, the laugh should have 
 an appropriate and rational relation to the 
 object or action at which we laugh. 
 
 3. We ought to be able to give a good and 
 
56 The Philosophy of 
 
 proper reason why we laugh. Quid rides ? 
 should receive a rational response. 
 
 4. For instance, let us suppose a frolic- 
 some young gentleman (a regular practical 
 joker) showing off his dexterity by suddenly 
 removing a chair from behind us, just as we 
 are on the point of sitting down ; the 
 inevitable result is that we come to the floor 
 with no very pleasant sensations. 
 
 5. The silly portion of the company 
 (which is rarely less than three-fourths) 
 will think it capital fun, and will exhibit 
 their delight by a giggle or a grin. 
 
 6. Now let us ask — most respectfully — is 
 there really any consistent relation between 
 this unfeeling and dangerous joke and the 
 laugh which immediately follows ? 
 
 7. Again : it is unfortunately but too 
 well known that old age deprives many of 
 us of the natural covering of the scalp, so 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 57 
 
 that some of us deem it necessary and con- 
 venient to mount a wig. 
 
 8. Under these circumstances it some- 
 times happens, on a windy day, that the hat 
 and wig are unceremoniously dismounted, 
 and begin to perform irregular and most 
 eccentric gyrations on the pavement. 
 
 9. The owner, of course, uses his best 
 endeavours to regain his fleeting property, 
 and he is immediately saluted with the ob- 
 streperous merriment of the fools who are 
 passing along. 
 
 10. Again let us ask, what necessary 
 connection can there be discovered between 
 this annoying accident and the fool's 
 laugh ? 
 
 11. We cannot refraia from adding 
 another illustration. 
 
 12. There is a practice which is very 
 prevalent among both the ignorant and 
 
58 The Philosophy of 
 
 intelligent vulgar of retailing low and 
 indecent anecdotes, and immodest witticisms, 
 which are immediately followed by sten- 
 torian laughter. 
 
 13. We ask once more, is there any 
 natural or rational relation between an 
 obscene joke and a fit of laughter ? 
 
 14. Ought it not rather to call forth a 
 frown of indignation or the blush of shame? 
 
 15. The fact is, there is no rational or 
 natural relation (as of cause and effect) 
 between the action of laughter and the 
 action or words at which we laugh. 
 
 16. The conclusion is unavoidable, that 
 the absurd habit of laughing is entirely 
 occasioned by the unnatural and false asso- 
 ciations which have been forced upon us in 
 early life. 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 59 
 
 CHAPTEE IX. 
 
 On the criterion by which to distinguish natural or 
 instinctive actions and habits from those which 
 are acquired. 
 
 1. Hunger and thirst, eating and drink- 
 ing, talking and walking, fatigue and repose, 
 are all natural, and these actions and sensa- 
 tions are common and universal ; they are 
 essential to all healthy and properly orga- 
 nised human beings in every nation in the 
 world ; there are no deviations from this 
 natural arrangement. 
 
 2. That is to say, the actions of walking 
 and talking, eating and drinking, are invari- 
 ably performed by every healthy member of 
 the human family, in every country, savage 
 
60 The Philosophy of 
 
 or civilised ; and hunger and thirst, fatigue 
 and repose, are invariably experienced by 
 all. 
 
 3. In the performance of such actions as 
 are really natural and instinctive there are 
 no exceptions, either national or individual. 
 
 4. Whatever is inherent and natural is 
 essential to the constitution of human beings, 
 and therefore universal. 
 
 5. But most decidedly this is not the 
 case with respect to those convulsions which 
 are denominated laughter. 
 
 6. All the inhabitants of every country 
 do not involuntarily and violently heave 
 their chests and distort their countenances 
 when they witness monkey tricks and buf- 
 foonery, or when their ears are assailed by 
 vulgar tales and lewd anecdotes. 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 61 
 
 CHAPTER X. 
 
 On the intellectual and moral status of the ordinary 
 incentives to laughter* 
 
 1. The remarks in the preceding chapter 
 naturally lead us to a consideration of the 
 moral phase of our theme, which un- 
 doubtedly presents the most important view 
 of this novel and interesting question. 
 
 2. Let us briefly inquire, in the first 
 place, what are the objects, the words, and 
 the actions which excite laughter ? 
 
 3. And secondly, what are the moral and 
 intellectual characteristics of those who are 
 addicted to laughing ? 
 
 4. The answers to these two questions 
 
62 The Philosophy of 
 
 will throw considerable light upon our 
 investigation. 
 
 5. Now, if we can make it obvious that 
 the words and actions which provoke laugh- 
 ter are neither elevating, nor refining, nor 
 humanising, and that they are incapable of 
 developing or strengthening any one human 
 virtue, we thereby incontestably prove such 
 words and actions are not worthy to be 
 practised or cultivated — that they are, in 
 fact, altogether unworthy of our attention. 
 
 6. But if we can still further show that 
 the words and actions which excite laughter 
 are either immoral in their tendency or de- 
 grading and vulgarising, we thereby incon- 
 testably prove that such words and actions 
 are not only unworthy of our attention, but 
 that they ought to be studiously avoided, 
 and that we ought to struggle against them, 
 and, as far as possible, expunge them for 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 63 
 
 ever from the catalogue of human words and 
 actions. 
 
 7. In the first place, then, what are the 
 words and actions which excite laughter ? 
 
 8. Are they not the absurd, the ridicu- 
 lous, the mischievous, the wicked, the lewd, 
 the profane ? 
 
 9. Are they not words and actions which 
 give pain to others ? 
 
 10. Words and actions which injure the 
 character of others ? 
 
 11. Words and actions which cause shame 
 and confusion of face to the innocent and 
 virtuous ? 
 
 12. Smart swindling is laughed at; the 
 exploits of a clever pickpocket raise a laugh; 
 adroit or expert overreaching and cheating 
 in business are choice subjects for 
 laughter. 
 
 13. Vicious tricks, practical jokes, and 
 
64 The Philosophy of 
 
 extravagant and outrageous follies excite 
 laughter. 
 
 14. The boisterous and violent demeanour 
 of a drunkard invariably provokes laughter 
 in the superficial and unthinking, and un- 
 fortunately the superficial and unthinking 
 constitute ninety-nine in every hundred. 
 
 15. The least objectionable causes of 
 laughter are by no means worthy of our 
 imitation or applause — namely, such as are 
 excited by frivolity and nonsense — -fun, as it 
 is complaisantly called, silly conceits, incon- 
 gruities, and inconsistencies, which are alto- 
 gether beneath the self-regard of a sensible 
 man to imitate or encourage. 
 
 16. In the mildest terms that can be 
 applied to them they are simply ridiculous 
 and absurd, and certainly indicate a partial 
 suspension of intellect or judgment, an 
 emptiness of mind verging on imbecility. 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 65 
 
 CHAPTER XL 
 
 On the moral and intellectual characteristics of 
 those who are addicted to laughing. 
 
 1. Habitual laughers are invariably 
 either ignorant, vulgar, or uncultivated. 
 
 2. Silly, giddy, frivolous, superficial, 
 shallow-brained people always laugh im- 
 moderately at the merest trifles; and ex- 
 tremely empty-headed simpletons acquire 
 such an inveterate habit of laughing, that 
 they involuntarily laugh at absolutely 
 nothing. 
 
 3. What is the most striking peculiarity 
 of the mockers, the gibers, the taunters, the 
 scoffers ? 
 
6Q The Philosophy of 
 
 4. Are they not invariably the inveterate 
 laughers ? 
 
 5. Are they not, in general, the coarse, the 
 vulgar, the brutal, the unfeeling ? 
 
 6. What are the feelings of those who are 
 laughed at ? Who likes to be laughed at ? 
 
 7. Children (who, of course, are ignorant) 
 laugh considerably — that is to say, in civilised 
 countries. 
 
 8. As they grow older, and gain know- 
 ledge and good sense, their laughing pro- 
 pensity gradually becomes weaker, and the 
 habit of laughing gradually diminishes. 
 
 9. If they become studious and intelli- 
 gent (which all human beings ought to 
 become) the spasm of laughter is rarely 
 exhibited. 
 
 10. The author of the following lines 
 (which constitute the re/rain of a Bacchanalian 
 lyric) very candidly sets forth the close and 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 67 
 
 intimate relation which subsists between 
 folly and laughter : — 
 
 " Francs buveurs qui Bacclms attire 
 Dans ses retraites qu'il cherit, 
 Avec nous, venez boire et rire — 
 Plus on est defoux — plus on rit." 
 
 11. In general terms we may assert (and 
 it will, doubtless, accord with, the experience 
 of all those who observe and reflect) that 
 ignorant, frivolous fools are almost con- 
 tinually on the giggle or titter, whilst in- 
 telligent and sensible people (whose thoughts 
 are, of course, occupied with good and useful 
 ideas) seldom descend to laughter. 
 
 12. Indeed, if a man's mind be occupied 
 by good and useful ideas, how can it be 
 possible for him to laugh ? 
 
68 The Philosophy of 
 
 CHAPTER XII. 
 
 Are laughter and joking, badinage and fun, con- 
 sistent with dignity of character ? or are they 
 conducive to the maintenance of a beneficial 
 political or social influence ? 
 
 1 . The following observations, which, ap- 
 peared in the Daily Telegraph of September, 
 1868 (although written en badinage), are 
 true to the letter, and exhibit an excellent 
 illustration of the correctness of the theory 
 which we have had the hardihood to espouse 
 and defend in the preceding pages : — 
 
 2. "It is," says the writer " rather a loss 
 to Mr. Osborne (who is fighting hard for his 
 seat at Nottingham) that he* is not a dull 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 69 
 
 man. If he makes a really clever sug- 
 gestive speech., it is sure to be besprinkled 
 with jokes — so broken up by 'laughter' in 
 parenthesis, that the graver parts are apt to 
 be passed over by the many readers who 
 detest to be instructed, and who like to be 
 amused. 
 
 3. "An Osborne without his jokes would 
 be a fair statesman of the second rank, and 
 far superior to the average intellect of the 
 twelve or thirteen that go to form the rank 
 and file of a Conservative Cabinet. His 
 intellect is as clear, his ability of exposition 
 as great, his acuteness in detecting fallacies 
 as keen, as that of any speaker in either 
 House. 
 
 4. " But Englishmen are much attached 
 to grave men. 
 
 5. " The late Sir Eobert Peel had, we be- 
 lieve, a deep sense of humour in private 
 
70 The Philosophy of 
 
 society, but in public life he was pre-eminently 
 a grave man ; and be owed a great deal of 
 the reverence felt for him, even by his 
 opponents, to the solemnity of his manner 
 and the steady seriousness of his tone. 
 
 6. " The Earl of Chatham was grave, and 
 he retained his influence even when his 
 mistakes were as grave as himself 
 
 7. " Pitt was solemn. 
 
 8. " Lord Grey was always dignified, de- 
 corous, and incapable of a joke ; and in such 
 men a popular confidence is placed which is 
 seldom or never given to men of wit and 
 humour about town. 
 
 9. " Fox lost caste, because, though his 
 policies were wise, and would have saved us 
 millions of our debt, he was light-hearted 
 and gay. 
 
 10. "In his own day Canning was success- 
 fully attacked because he was a joker of 
 
I 
 
 Laughter and Smiling; 71 
 
 jokes, and spiteful antagonists denied his 
 statesmanship because he had penned witty 
 lampoons. 
 
 11. " Lord Melbourne, who really had the 
 instincts of a true statesman, was always 
 underrated; and Palmerston had to live 
 down, for forty years, the effects of his bon- 
 Jiommie and his readiness to jest. 
 
 12. "In fact, our national character is 
 mainly grave; Englishmen may laugh at 
 jokes, but they distrust the joker. 
 
 13. " Sidney Smith was one of the ablest 
 preachers whom the English Church had 
 produced for generations ; a conscientious 
 pastor and a thorough Churchman, he stood 
 in the foreground, fighting the battles of 
 liberality and religious truth when there 
 was no chance of any earthly reward ; yet 
 the Liberals passed him over, and appointed 
 to bishoprics utterly inferior men, simply 
 
72 The Philosophy of 
 
 because he was humorous and witty, and 
 they were irredeemably grave. 
 
 14. " We should therefore be inclined to 
 advise Mr. Osborne to mend his ways. 
 Let him abjure jokes. Let him never pro- 
 voke 'laughter.' Let him be bigoted, 
 solemn, and dull, and he will be made a 
 Tory minister ; or let him be statistical and 
 serious, and he may one day get an Under- 
 Secretary ship from a Liberal Ministry." 
 
 15. We consider it no exaggeration to 
 declare this article to be as clever and as 
 truthful a sketch as ever appeared in the 
 columns of the Daily Telegraph. 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 73 
 
 CHAPTER XIII. 
 
 The verdict of Shakspeare on the moral character 
 of laughter. 
 
 1. Although our Immortal Bard has not 
 founded any of his dramatic works or poems 
 expressly on the theme of laughter, he has, 
 nevertheless, expressed himself in very 
 explicit and energetic terms in favour of the 
 opinions and views which it has been the 
 object of these pages to expound. 
 
 2. In the dialogue between Biron and 
 Bosaline (in Loves Labour Lost) he has thus 
 unfolded his ideas on the subject : — 
 
 Biron to Rosaline. Impose some service on me 
 for thy love. 
 
/./ 
 
 74 The Philosophy of 
 
 Eos aline. Oft have I heard of you, my Lord 
 Biron, 
 Before I saw you, and the world's large tongue 
 Proclaims you for a man replete with mocks, 
 Full of comparisons and wounding flouts, 
 Which you on all estates will execute 
 That lie within the mercy of your wit. 
 To weed this wormwood from your fruitful brain, 
 And therewithal to win me, if you please 
 (Without the which I am not to be won), 
 Tou shall, this twelvemonth term, from day to day, 
 Visit the speechless sick, and still converse 
 With groaning wretches ; and your task shall be, 
 With all the fierce endeavour of your wit, 
 To enforce the pained impotents to smile. 
 
 Biron. To move wild laughter in the throat of 
 death ? 
 It cannot be — it is impossible. 
 
 Rosaline. Why that's the way to choke a gibing 
 spirit, 
 Whose influence is begot of that loose grace 
 Which shallow laughing hearers give to fools. 
 A jest's prosperity lies in the ear 
 Of him that hears it— never in the tongue 
 Of him that makes it. Then, if sickly ears, 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 75 
 
 Deafd with the clamour of their own dear groans, 
 
 Will hear your idle scorns — continue then, 
 
 And I will have you, and that fault withal. 
 
 But if they will not — throw away that gibing spirit, 
 
 And I shall find you empty of that fault, 
 
 Eight joyful of your reformation. 
 
 3. We most earnestly request the reader 
 to direct his particular and deliberate atten- 
 tion to this passage from Shakspeare. 
 
 4. A clearer or more convincing demon- 
 stration of the correctness of our theory 
 could not possibly be set forth than the 
 poet has presented in this exquisite episode. 
 
 5. There are many actions and incidents, 
 ideas and recitals, which are relished and 
 laughed at by the giddy, the ignorant, and 
 the unreflecting, but which, on the contrary, 
 excite the indignation and disgust of the 
 intelligent and humane. 
 
 6. The wise, the prudent, and the 
 thoughtful rarely laugh. If 
 
76 The Philosophy of 
 
 7. The more we improve ourselves, the 
 more we cultivate and refine our manners 
 and conversation, the more efforts we make 
 to be useful, and the more we strive to do 
 good, just in the same degree we cease to be 
 agitated by the convulsions and distortions 
 of laughter. 
 
 8. The natural and certain result of such 
 a course of intellectual and moral progress 
 would be, that we should live a higher life, 
 consequently experience a more perfect state 
 of happiness ; and this is, or ought to be, 
 
 " Our being's end and aim." 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 77 
 
 CHAPTEE XIV. 
 
 A brief comparison between gravity and levity — 
 The grave and the gay — Have we any rule to 
 direct us in the exercise of laughter ? 
 
 1. When we compare the moral attributes 
 of gravity with those of levity, or serious- 
 ness with frivolity, we can hardly avoid the 
 conclusion that they bear nearly the same 
 relation to each other as virtue bears to vice, 
 or wisdom to folly. 
 
 2. Gravity and seriousness always exert a 
 beneficial influence, whereas frivolity and 
 levity, on the contrary, produce a demoralis- 
 ing and vulgarising effect. 
 
 3. Gravity and decorum are the striking 
 characteristics of the wise and prudent — 
 
78 The Philosophy of 
 
 frivolity and laughter are tlie predominating 
 features of ignorance and folly. 
 
 4. Moreover, there is no consistent prin- 
 ciple or fixed standard by which a person 
 may be guided in the use of laughter. 
 
 5. Superficial fools and ignorant boors will 
 laugh vociferously at that which would only 
 excite contempt in the mind of an educated 
 man. 
 
 6. Conversely, there are many sayings and 
 doings which an intelligent man would 
 appreciate as genuine wit, but at which the 
 shallow-brained ignoramus would listen and 
 gape with a vacant stare. 
 
 7. The prevalence of folly and vice will 
 produce very different effects on the opposite 
 temperaments of the grave and the gay. 
 
 8. Heraclitus wept at the follies, frivoli- 
 ties, and vicissitudes of human existence 
 Democritus laughed at them. 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 79 
 
 CHAPTEE XV. 
 
 On the degrading and vicious consequences of the 
 habit of laughing. 
 
 1. In the present chapter we shall 
 endeavour to point out that the obstreperous 
 and meaningless habit of laughing is, if not 
 the entire cause, at least one of the principal 
 causes, of the existence and continuance of 
 the follies, frivolities, mischiefs, and lewd 
 conversations which are now so rampant in 
 every class of society, and which sink it so 
 low in the moral scale. 
 
 2. The actors of all practical jokes, the 
 authors of every species of mischief, the 
 retailers of low, vulgar, and obscene 
 
80 The Philosophy of 
 
 anecdotes, together with utterers of scandal, 
 are all instigated by the very contemptible 
 ambition of raising a laugh, a giggle, or a 
 smirk at some one's expense. 
 
 3. These miserable mongers of fonl talk, 
 and these vulgar performers of practical 
 jokes, exhibit their absurd antics, and retail 
 their obscene anecdotes, for the express 
 purpose of exciting laughter, which they 
 expect and look for as a gratification and 
 reward for their ingenuity, dexterity, or wit. 
 
 4. This being the case, we may safely 
 conclude that if follies, vulgarities, and 
 absurdities were never laughed at, but were 
 listened to in silence, and treated with the 
 contempt which they really deserve, they 
 would soon cease to be practised. 
 
 5. Who would transform themselves into 
 monkeys, or magpies, or buffoons (as thou- 
 sands are in the habit of doing), if their un- 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 81 
 
 meaning absurdities were visited with silence 
 and contempt ? 
 
 6. Who would continue to indulge in 
 gibes and mocks and ribaldry, or shameless 
 conversation, if they were received with a 
 frown or a rebuke ? 
 
 7. All these abominations and annoyances 
 are continued, and actually expand and 
 increase, precisely because they are inces- 
 santly laughed-at. 
 
 8. Not only are absurdities, and follies, 
 and mischiefs supported and perpetuated 
 by being rewarded with a vulgar laugh, but 
 very many vices and actual crimes are re- 
 garded by the volatile and unreflecting as 
 capital jokes, and are greeted with a hearty 
 burst of laughter. 
 
 9. Thomas Carlyle says that England 
 contains twenty millions of people, mostly 
 
82 The Philosophy of 
 
 fools. We cannot help fully endorsing 
 Carlyle's estimate. 
 
 10. That there are so many fools is 
 mainly to be attributed to the false and 
 absurd associations which are engrafted upon 
 the minds of human beings during the 
 pliant period of infancy and childhood, and 
 more especially to those most ridiculous 
 associations which are connected with the 
 mindless habit of laughing. 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 83 
 
 CHAPTEB XVI. 
 
 On the injurious effects of nursery rhymes and 
 juvenile literature in stultifying the minds of 
 children and youths by furnishing them with 
 extravagant lies and egregious nonsense to 
 excite their wonder and induce them to laugh. 
 
 1. With very few exceptions the books 
 composed expressly for children liave always 
 been, and still continue to be, of the most 
 trashy description, and have had a powerful 
 and marked effect in degrading the morals 
 and stultifying the intellect. 
 
 2. They are generally made up of the 
 veriest nonsense and the most monstrous 
 absurdities. 
 
 3. These burlesque productions are chiefly 
 
84 The Philosophy of 
 
 designed to amuse by arousing the wonder 
 of their vacant-minded readers, by the rela- 
 tion of the most ridiculous and outrageous 
 lies, and to excite their laughter by the 
 recital of the most grotesque actions, and 
 the grossest follies and ribaldry. 
 
 4. In order to verify the correctness of 
 this somewhat severe criticism nothing more 
 will be necessary than to enumerate a few of 
 the titles of these gems of fiction, these pure 
 efforts of the imagination — to wit : — Jack the 
 Giant-Killer, Jack hnd the Bean-Stalk, Hop 
 d my TJiumb, Seven League Boots, Old Mother 
 Hubbard, Puss in Boots, Goody Two Shoes, 
 Little Bed Biding Hood. 
 
 5. We might easily append (if it were 
 requisite) the names of a host of more modern 
 productions of an equally interesting and 
 edifying description, adorned with elaborate 
 works of art, exhibiting the skill and ingenuity 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 85 
 
 of the artist in supplementing the heathen 
 mythology by the addition of such hideous 
 monsters as had never been dreamt of in 
 the wildest dreams of the poets and sculptors 
 of remote antiquity. 
 
 6. Can we wonder at the immense number 
 of silly, frivolous, giddy, giggling, full-grown 
 fools, who, in the present reign of Queen 
 Victoria, infest all ranks of society, when 
 we reflect that their nascent minds were 
 perverted, and distorted, and shrivelled in 
 their infancy and childhood by such sur- 
 passing nonsense and trashy garbage as 
 the nursery rhymes and juvenile litera- 
 ture we have just described, and which 
 are not only permitted, but universally en- 
 couraged ? 
 
 7. These extremely stupid and vulgar 
 books have been, and still continue to be, the 
 bane and curse of the intellect of the rising 
 
86 The Philosophy of 
 
 generation, and, in a vast majority of cases, 
 the utter ruin of their morals. 
 
 8. Nor can we hope to have any improve- 
 ment in the conduct and conversation of 
 human beings until our present nursery 
 literature shall be completely swept away, 
 and replaced by books of a pure and rational 
 character. 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 87 
 
 CHAPTER XVII. 
 
 A venial digression touching the false and imperfect 
 methods now in vogue of teaching and training 
 the young. 
 
 1. It cannot be denied that our pre- 
 sent methods of training young children are 
 lamentably deficient ; many of them, indeed, 
 are altogether contrary to reason* 
 
 2. For instance, it is perfectly well known 
 that whatever we teach children which is of 
 a sensible or useful character we impose it 
 upon them as a task ; but in their leisure 
 hours they are not only allowed, but en- 
 couraged, to relax their moral principles and 
 effeminate their intellects by reading the 
 
88 The Philosophy of 
 
 most incredible romances and story-books ; 
 to amuse themselves with irrational and 
 antagonistic games, and to fill up the inter- 
 vals with rude idle talk. 
 
 3. Moreover, the generality of parents and 
 nurses are continually laughing at, and con- 
 sequently encouraging, the silly and un- 
 meaning babble and tattle and chatter of 
 their children. 
 
 4. Thus the inexperienced children very 
 naturally begin to associate the action of 
 laughter with trashy nonsense and foolish 
 talk, till it becomes, in a great majority of 
 cases, the ruling passion and a permanent 
 habit ; and thus they entirely exclude from 
 the mind the important consideration that 
 folly and laughter do not, under any circum- 
 stances, constitute a part of the duties of 
 human life. 
 
 5. Parents almost universally ignore the 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 89 
 
 serious responsibility which, their thoughtless 
 neglect involves. They entirely forget — 
 although the injunction has been repeatedly 
 laid upon them — " That for every idle word 
 that men shall speak they shall give an 
 account on the day of judgment. For by 
 thy words thou shalt be justified, and by 
 thy words thou shalt be condemned/' 
 
 6. As actions are of still more importance 
 than words, this sweeping and emphatic 
 denunciation evidently implies the guilt of 
 those who commit idle or ridiculous actions, 
 as well as those who utter idle words, for the 
 minor in this case obviously includes the 
 major. 
 
 7. Everything that we teach children, 
 every book that we put into their hands to 
 read, should have some decided relation to 
 rational ideas or virtuous principles, to some 
 rale of conduct, or to some useful action. 
 
90 The Philosophy of 
 
 CHAPTEE XVIII. 
 
 Milton versus Shakspeare on the subject of 
 laughter. 
 
 1. We have already condemned, in no 
 very measured terms, the current literature 
 provided for the young by inferior and un- 
 known authors and artists ; but the manii* 
 facturers of nursery rhymes and children's 
 story-books are not alone responsible for the 
 moral debasement produced by grossly ex- 
 citing and contaminating literature. 
 
 2. Men of the highest stamp have de- 
 graded themselves and prostituted their 
 great talents to the propagation of loose 
 principles and the encouragement of licen- 
 tious actions. 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 91 
 
 3. As a specimen of this unpardonable 
 misapplication of the most splendid endow- 
 ments take the following extract from 
 I? Allegro. 
 
 4. It is scarcely necessary to inform the 
 reader that this poem is from the pen of the 
 sublime, the divine, the immortal Milton. 
 
 5. The poet is evidently in a revelling 
 mood, and he invites one of the Graces, to- 
 gether with others of a kindred character, 
 that his orgies may reach a climax. 
 
 " Come, thou goddess, fair and free, 
 In heaven yclept Euphrosyne, 
 And, by men, heart-easing Mirth, 
 Whom lovely Venus at a birth, 
 With two sister Graces more, 
 To ivy-crowned Bacchus bore ; 
 Or whether (as some sages say) 
 The frolic wind that breathes the spring, 
 Zephyr with Aurora playing 
 There on beds of violet blue 
 And fresh-blown roses washed in dew, 
 
92 The Philosophy of 
 
 Filled lier with thee a daughter fair, 
 
 So buxom, blithe, and debonnair. 
 
 Haste thee, nymph, and bring with thee, 
 
 Jest and youthful jollity, 
 
 Quips and cranks and wanton wiles, 
 
 Nods and becks and wreathed smiles, 
 
 Such as hang on Phoebe's cheek, 
 
 And love to live in dimple sleek. 
 
 Sport that wrinkled Care derides, 
 
 And Laughter holding both his sides — 
 
 Come and trip it as you go, 
 
 On the light fantastic toe, 
 
 And in thy right hand lead with thee 
 
 The mountain nymph, sweet Liberty. 
 
 And if I give thee honour due, 
 
 Mirth, admit me of thy crew, 
 
 To live with her, and live with thee 
 
 In unreproved pleasures free." 
 
 6. Can we imagine a more attractive or 
 more seducing invocation to the indulgence 
 of the grossest, the most vitiating, the most 
 brutifying of all the sensual appetites ? 
 
 7. Verily, the moral world owes John 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 93 
 
 Milton (of Paradise Lost celebrity) a certain 
 amount of pity — not unmingled with, con- 
 tempt — for setting forth, in such euphonious 
 strains, such alluring incentives to de- 
 bauchery. 
 
94 The Philosophy of 
 
 CHAPTEE XIX. 
 
 A comparison between those sayings and doings 
 which are laughed at and those which are not 
 laughed at. 
 
 1. A brief summary of the words and 
 actions which we are in the habit of laugh- 
 ing at, compared with those which do not 
 excite laughter, will exhibit the argument 
 in a still more convincing form. 
 
 2. We laugh at folly, frequently at vice — 
 we never laugh at wisdom, or justice, or any 
 other cardinal virtues. 
 
 3. "We laugh at practical jokes and mis- 
 chievous pranks — we never laugh at grati- 
 tude, or acts of benevolence, or any species 
 of kindness. 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 95 
 
 4. We laugh, at many species of crime, 
 lewd conversation, and vulgar anecdotes — 
 we never laugh at gentlemanly or honour- 
 able conduct, or any species of virtuous or 
 edifying conversation. 
 
 5. We frequently laugh at wit, satire, 
 sarcasm. But these are all used to point 
 out or stigmatise something injurious, de- 
 grading, dishonourable, or contemptible ; 
 something ridiculous, or some incongruity; 
 or to scandalise some one, or to bring some 
 one into contempt, or to castigate some folly 
 or injustice. 
 
 6. The vices and failings we have just 
 enumerated are doubtless legitimate objects of 
 laughter and ridicule whenever or wherever 
 they exhibit themselves, if by laughter and 
 ridicule they can be gradually put down and 
 finally abolished. 
 
 7. For it must be universally acknow- 
 
96 The Philosophy of 
 
 ledged that all these evil, injurious, and de- 
 grading qualities are vices which should have 
 been eradicated in early youth, or rather 
 which should not have been allowed to take 
 root — and then the wit, satire, and sarcasm 
 would not have been required to rebuke 
 them; consequently, the stimulus which 
 they present to excite our risible muscles 
 into action would no longer exist. 
 
 8. "We laugh at ignorance, but never at 
 intelligence or useful knowledge. 
 
 9. We laugh at the caricatures and bur- 
 lesques — the vulgar witticisms and out- 
 rageous nonsense of Beaumont, Fletcher, 
 Fielding, Prior, Butler, and other similar 
 humorists — but we never laugh at the 
 sublime and virtue-inspiring precepts of 
 Pythagoras, Epictetus, Plutarch, or Seneca. 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 97 
 
 CHAPTEE XX. 
 
 The character of Laughers compared with the cha- 
 racter of those who are thoughtful and serious 
 
 1. Let us repeat the fact (which, should 
 be continually borne in mind by all those 
 who maintain that laughter is consistent 
 with propriety and decorum) — namely, that 
 habitual laughers are silly, giddy, frivolous, 
 superficial persons — that is to say, they are,, 
 in one expressive word — fools, 
 
 2. A second fact requires equally to be 
 remembered — namely, that sensible and in- 
 telligent persons, whose lives are occupied in 
 the important duties of improving their 
 minds, in being useful, and in doing good. 
 
98 The Philosophy of 
 
 and whose leisure hours are spent in rational, 
 cheerful, and humanising enjoyments — such 
 persons (male or female) are rarely tempted 
 to laugh ; and many very excellent men and 
 women never laugh under any possible cir- 
 cumstances. 
 
 3. The gentle, the most amiable, the most 
 intelligent, the most virtuous are rarely 
 prone to laughter. 
 
 4. On the other hand, the worst of cha- 
 racters, the depraved, the dissipated, the 
 criminal are generally much addicted to 
 uproarious mirth and laughter. 
 
 5. Moreover (to summarise what we 
 have already stated in detail), all the in- 
 numerable words and actions which induce 
 or compel people to laugh are invariably 
 tainted with some degree of folly, vice, or 
 crime — absurdity, stupidity, or nonsense — 
 levity, frivolity, or trifling — all of which, it 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 99 
 
 must be at once acknowledged, are decidedly 
 objectionable, and should, therefore, as soon 
 as possible, be utterly swept away. 
 
 6. An evident and most important corol- 
 lary may be deduced from the latter proposi- 
 tion — namely, that the more these vices can 
 be avoided and got rid of, the better it will 
 be for the happiness of mankind. 
 
 7. Eationality, good sense, wisdom, virtue, 
 righteousness are never laughed at; but 
 these are precisely the qualities which should 
 universally abound. 
 
 8. We may very safely conclude that the 
 universal predominance of these qualities 
 would be the total annihilation of laughter. 
 
100 The Philosophy of 
 
 CHAPTER XXI. 
 
 Classification of Laughs and Smiles. 
 
 The following list enumerates a few of 
 tlie various kinds of laughs and smiles, 
 classified in genera, species, and varieties: — 
 
 The first genus is the " Laugh/' exhibiting 
 five species, namely — 
 
 1. The gigghng laugh, excited by romp- 
 ing fun and nonsense. 
 
 2. The hearty laugh, instigated by practi- 
 cal jokes or extremely absurd antics. 
 
 3. The fall-faced laugh of the weaker 
 sex. 
 
 4. The boisterous laugh of the stronger 
 sex. 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 101 
 
 5. The Ne plus ultra laugh, which may 
 be variously denominated as the obstrepe- 
 rous laugh — the vociferous laugh — the sten- 
 torian laugh — or the horse laugh. 
 
 The second genus is the " Smile," under 
 which we have arranged four species, each 
 containing a certain number of varieties. 
 
 First species — Simulated smiles, containing 
 six varieties — namely, 
 
 1 . The condescending or patronising smile . 
 
 2. The insidious smile. 
 
 3. The sardonic sneer or furtive leer. 
 
 4. The beseeching or persuading smile. 
 
 5. The ironical or don t-you-wish-you- 
 may-get-it? smile. 
 
 6. The cajoling smirk or wheedling grin. 
 Second species — Vulgar or unintellectual 
 
 smiles, containing three varieties — namely, 
 1. The credulous simper or gullible smile. 
 
102 The Philosophy of 
 
 2. The chuckle or exulting smile. 
 
 3. The vague persistent smile, or vacant 
 simper. 
 
 Tliird species — Eefined, intellectual, and 
 amiable smiles, containing ten varieties — 
 namely, 
 
 1. The entreating smile of infancy. 
 
 2. The confiding smile of childhood. 
 
 3. The maternal sympathetic smile. 
 
 4. The infant's smile of delight. 
 
 5. The grandmother's affectionate smile. 
 
 6. The grandchild's grateful smile. 
 
 7. The joyous smile of friendly recog- 
 nition. 
 
 8. The supremely affectionate smile. 
 
 9. The pensive smile. 
 
 10. The self-conceited smile, or smile of 
 self-esteem. 
 
 Fourth species — The creature-comfort 
 smiles, containing two varieties — namely, 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 103 
 
 1. Sawney's snuff- tickling smile. 
 
 2. Jack Tar's joyful smile over "the cup 
 that cheers but not inebriates." 
 
 The species of laughter are as limited in 
 their range as those of the smile are ex- 
 tensive- 
 Each individual, when under the influence 
 of laughter, puts forth his or her peculiar 
 giggle, grin, snort, or titter, which generally 
 preserves its identical intonation and ring 
 as long in life as the laughing habit con- 
 tinues, or till old age subdues it. 
 
 It would appear that the only variation 
 of which a laugh is susceptible consists in 
 its greater or less degree of intensity. 
 
104 The Philosophy of 
 
 CHAPTEE XXII. 
 
 On the broad line of demarcation which separates 
 laughter from smiling. 
 
 1. In discoursing of "Laughter" and 
 " Smiling," we must carefully guard against 
 tlie popular fallacy of confounding these 
 very distinct modifications of the counte- 
 nance. 
 
 2. These two functions of the fibrous 
 tissue exhibit very dissimilar species of 
 action. 
 
 3. A laugh is generally regarded as a 
 smile continued and intensified and carried 
 out to a climax. 
 
 4. When, however, they are carefully 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 105 
 
 analysed they will be found to be quite 
 distinct — distinct in essence, distinct in 
 origin, distinct in action, distinct in effect; 
 producing and manifesting very dissimilar 
 states of feeling. 
 
 5. "Walker (in his Dictionary) defines the 
 verb to laugh at — to treat with contempt, 
 to ridicule, to deride, to scorn. 
 
 6. The same authority defines the verb to 
 smile — to be favourable, to be propitious, to 
 look with pleasure or kindness. 
 
 7. We will endeavour to amplify upon 
 these definitions, and to give an analysis 
 which will more distinctly exhibit the con- 
 trast. 
 
 8. A laugh distorts every feature, and 
 renders even a handsome face unpleasing and 
 ridiculous, so that a refined and intelligent 
 spectator is apt to turn away from it. 
 
 9. A smile lights up the countenance 
 
106 The Philosophy of 
 
 with all the radiance of beauty, invests it 
 with an irresistible attraction, and imparts 
 a pleasure which no language can adequately 
 describe. 
 
 10. A laugh is invariably accompanied 
 by a convulsive action of the diaphragm. 
 
 11. Sir Charles Bell, treating of the phe- 
 nomenon of Laughter in his celebrated 
 treatise on the " Anatomy of Expression/* 
 presents us with the following vivid descrip- 
 tion: — 
 
 12. " Observe the condition of a man con- 
 vulsed with laughter. He draws a full 
 breath, and throws it out in short, inter- 
 rupted, and audible cachinnations. The 
 muscles of his throat, neck, and chest are 
 agitated; the diaphragm is especially con- 
 vulsed. He holds his sides, and from the 
 violent agitation he is incapable of a volun- 
 tary act." 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 107 
 
 13. Although the irresistible convulsion 
 of the diaphragm is the principal of the 
 physical manifestations of laughter, yet there 
 are several accessories, especially the sharp 
 vocal utterances arising from the violent dis- 
 tension of the larynx, and the wrinkled and 
 distorted expression of every feature. 
 
 14. A smile is entirely free from all these 
 violent and painful emotions — no convulsions 
 — no distortions — no violent distension of 
 the vocal organs. 
 
 15. In laughter the strain upon the 
 muscles concerned in the operation deprives 
 the laugher of the power of exercising any 
 of his other faculties. He can neither think, 
 speak, nor act. As Sir Charles Bell ex- 
 presses it, " he is incapable of a voluntary 
 act." 
 
 16. How exactly the reverse are the 
 manifestations of a smile, during which all 
 
108 The Philosophy of 
 
 the faculties have full scope — the thoughts 
 are the purest, the words are the gentlest, 
 the actions are the kindest ! 
 
 17. A laugh is always accompanied by a 
 disagreeable noise, which cannot be more 
 correctly designated than as idiotic. It 
 invariably produces a silly, vulgar, unmean- 
 ing sound — whether it be a giggle or a grin 
 — a compressed he ! he ! — an expanded ha ! 
 ha ! or a downright broad horse laugh. 
 
 18. A smile never gives rise to the 
 least noise or sound of any kind ; it manifests 
 the kindliest sympathies in sweet and 
 gentle silence. 
 
 [The reader must bear in mind that we 
 are here speaking of the smile of sincerity, 
 candour, and benevolence — the most essential 
 characteristics of humanity, properly so 
 called. 
 
 The vicious, the cunning, the overreach- 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 10& 1 
 
 ing, with flexible features and apt imitative 
 faculties, can easily simulate a smile of any- 
 kind or degree. 
 
 Hamlet, after the interview with the 
 ghost of his father, takes out his tablets to 
 write a record, saying — 
 
 " Villain, villain, smiling damned villain — 
 
 Meet it is I sat it down 
 
 That one may smile and smile and be a villain."} 
 
 19. The various species of laughter are 
 all ridiculous, absurd, or impudent — vulgar 
 or idiotic — presenting ugliness to the sight* 
 and harsh and grating sounds to the ear. 
 
 20. The various species of the genuine 
 or amiable smile are all beautiful, whether 
 of benevolence or kindness — sympathy or 
 gratitude — admiration, veneration, or affec- 
 tion — they are all sweetness and beauty. 
 
 21. We suspect a laugh, we confide in a 
 smile ; contempt and ridicule lurk under a 
 
110 Philosophy of Laughter and Smiling. 
 
 laugh, love and friendship beam in a 
 smile. 
 
 22. Another very marked distinction be- 
 tween smiling and laughing is this : — Smiling 
 may be caused — and, in fact, is generally 
 caused — by witnessing the exhibition of any 
 of the virtues ; but we cannot imagine, 
 for a moment, the possibility of any sane 
 person laughing at the performance of an 
 honourable or virtuous action. 
 
A Series of Engravings 
 
 EXHIBITING A FEW SPECIMENS OF THE DIS- 
 TORTIONS WHICH LAUGHTER PRODUCES ON 
 THE " HUMAN PACE DIVINE." 
 
The Giggling Laugh, excited by Boisterous Fun and 
 Nonsense. 
 

 The Obstreperous Laugh, instigated by Practical Jokes 
 or Extreme Absurdities. 
 
The Hearty Laugh of the Gentler Sex. 
 
The Stentorian Laugli of the Stronger Sex. 
 
The Superlative Laugh, or Highest Degree of Laughter. 
 
Philosophy of Laughter and Smiling. 113 
 
 CHAPTER XXIII. 
 
 Further illustrations of the distinction between a 
 laugh and a smile. 
 
 1. The thoughtful and curious reader 
 may naturally ask — "Are there any definite 
 and precise criteria by which we can at once 
 truly distinguish a smile from a laugh ?" 
 
 2. We answer — " Most assuredly there 
 are/' and we shall now endeavour to point 
 them out. 
 
 3. Whatever may be the exciting cause 
 of laughter, the paroxysm comes on sud- 
 denly, shaking the whole bodily frame, par- 
 ticularly the lungs, the diaphragm, and pec- 
 toral muscles. 
 
114 The Philosophy of 
 
 4. It interrupts the breathing for a longer 
 or shorter period, according to the degree of 
 its intensity, and then ceases as suddenly as 
 it commenced. 
 
 5. The function of laughter can only be 
 properly compared to such functions as 
 coughing, hiccoughing, or sneezing, which 
 are all involuntary convulsions, caused by 
 disorder of the functions of the organs 
 which are implicated. 
 
 6. Smiling may be compared to any other 
 of the voluntary functions in which all the 
 organs employed act in immediate conso- 
 nance with the volition- — such as reading, 
 reciting, singing, playing on an instrument, 
 or any similar occupation — in which actions 
 all the operations are perfectly spontaneous, 
 and can be indulged in on any occasion in 
 which it may be desirable. You can modify 
 these actions as you please — you can con- 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 115 
 
 tinue them or bring them to a just termina- 
 tion, as you please. 
 
 7. But, on the other hand, with respect to 
 laughter : — You cannot by any means im- 
 provise a genuine laugh. You may imitate 
 it if you please ; but the counterfeit is a 
 mere sham, a shell, a husk. Its operation 
 is confined entirely to the vocal organs, and 
 does not in the least interfere with the 
 natural movements of the pectoral muscles, 
 the diaphragm, or the lungs ; nor does it 
 shake the bodily frame as do the convulsions 
 of real laughter. 
 
 8. Laughter is invariably accompanied by 
 noises of various degrees of depth and acute- 
 ness ; but in every case the noises are not 
 only disagreeable and ridiculous, but when 
 imitated the sounds are hideous and idiotic. 
 
 9. Smiling, on the contrary, is not accom- 
 panied by any audible sound whatever. 
 
116 The Philosophy of 
 
 10. A smile comes on gently, does not 
 agitate the breathing apparatus in the least 
 degree, and subsides as gently as it com- 
 menced. 
 
 11. Smiling causes no headache or aching 
 of the sides, nor does it give rise to any 
 pain or disturbing sensations in any of the 
 bodily organs. 
 
 12. The state of the organism in a fit of 
 laughter is a state of painful excitement and 
 agitation, and is, moreover, morally annoying 
 to any one possessing the least dignity of 
 character or thoughtful reflection. 
 
 13. The continuance of a fit of laughter, 
 even for a few minutes, would, from the in- 
 tensity of its convulsions, assuredly prove 
 fatal. 
 
 14. The physical state of the organism 
 during the manifestation of a smile is per- 
 fect tranquillity and repose. The moral 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 117 
 
 state of consciousness is pleasurable beyond 
 expression. 
 
 1 5. A smile may be continued ad libitum 
 for any possible length of time, without 
 causing any other than pleasurable sensa- 
 tions. 
 
 16. A smile, as we have already observed, 
 is quite spontaneous, whilst a true laugh is 
 invariably compulsory, and it is often excited 
 in direct opposition to our wishes. 
 
The following illustrations present a few 
 examples of the infinite variety of the smile 
 by which the different emotions or passions 
 of the human soul are made manifest on 
 the countenance. 
 
-SIMULATED SMILES. 
 
The Condescending or the Patronising Smile. 
 
The Insidious Smile. 
 
J_ 
 
 The Sardonic Sneer, or Furtive Le 
 
The Beseeching or Persuading Smile. 
 
The Cajoling Smirk, or Wheedling Grin. 
 
VULGAR OR UNINTELLECTUAL SMILES. 
 
 

The Chuckle, or Exulting Smile. 
 
The Vague Persistent Smile, or Vacant Simper. 
 
REFINED, INTELLECTUAL, AND AMIABLE 
 SMILES. 
 
The Entreating Smile. 
 
 The Confiding Smile. 
 
The Mother's Sympathetic Smile, and the Infant's 
 Smile of Delight. 
 
The Grandmother's Affectionate Smile, and the Grandchild's 
 Grateful Smile. 
 
The Pensive Smile. 
 
The Self-conceited Smile, or the Smile of Self-Esteam. 
 
CREATURE - COMFORT SMILES. 
 

The Joyful Smile over the Cup that Cheers but 
 not Inebriates. 
 
Philosophy of Laughter and Smiling. 1 29 
 
 CHAPTER XXIV. 
 
 Is it a fact (as is generally affirmed) that those who 
 are habituated to laugh are good-tempered, 
 generous, and philanthropic? And, on the 
 contrary, that those who seldom or never laugh 
 are gloomy, repulsive, and misanthropic cha- 
 racters who ought to be suspected and shunned ? 
 
 1. Notions and opinions that pass current 
 in society generally gain our belief and con- 
 fidence without our giving them the least 
 examination. 
 
 2. For example : — It has been frequently 
 asserted, with the greatest assurance, that a 
 man who never laughs is morose, unfeeling, 
 malignant, a suspicious character not to be 
 trusted. 
 
130 Tlie Philosophy of 
 
 3. Like many of our traditional notions, 
 this is purely a popular fallacy. 
 
 4. "We have only to exercise our powers 
 of observation to become aware of the 
 existence of many instances of individuals 
 who very rarely laugh, and who are, never- 
 theless, not only highly intellectual, but 
 highly amiable and benevolent. 
 
 5. On the other hand, the instances are 
 very numerous of individuals who are very 
 great proficients in the exercise of laughing 
 and giggling, who are nevertheless very 
 slightly endowed with either intellect, 
 amiability, or benevolence. 
 
 6. When we call to mind the character 
 and writings of the great and wise men of 
 antiquity, we can hardly conceive them to 
 be jesters, harlequins, or merry-andrews. 
 
 7. Imagine, for a moment, of Confucius 
 or Pythagoras reciting jokes to their pupils 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 131 
 
 to excite a laugh, as many of our orators do 
 at the present day. 
 
 8. Can we conceive of Plato wrinkling 
 his features, and distending his jugular 
 veins, in order to amuse his listeners ? 
 
 9. Did Plutarch set the table in a roar ? 
 Did Cicero's orations induce his audiences 
 to shake their sides ? 
 
 10. When we read Isaiah and the 
 Prophets do we distort our features ? Was 
 St. Paul a " man of wit and humour about 
 town ?" 
 
 11. Whatever the ancient sages may have 
 done in their ignorant and childish days, 
 we cannot resist the conclusion that when 
 they came to years of maturity they were 
 men who never laughed. 
 
 12. We read in one verse in the New 
 Testament that " Jesus wept," but there is 
 no record that He ever laughed ; nor can we 
 
132 The Philosophy of 
 
 conceive the probability or consistency of 
 such an event. 
 
 13. Thus we perceive that laughter does 
 not make a good man, and that there are 
 thousands of good men who never laugh. 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 133 
 
 CONCLUDING. 
 
 1. Hearken to the voice of the wise 
 man. (Eccles. vii. 2 — 6.) " It is better to 
 go to the house of mourning than to the 
 house of feasting. Sorrow is better than 
 laughter. 
 
 2. " The heart of the wise is in the house 
 of mourning, but the heart of fools is in the 
 house of mirth. 
 
 3. u It is better to hear the voice of the 
 wise than for a man to hear the song of 
 fools. 
 
 4. " For as the crackling of thorns under 
 & pot, so is the laughter of fools." 
 
 5. Whatever is good and true, kind and 
 
134 Philosophy of Laughter and Smiling. 
 
 "benevolent, whatever is beautiful and good, 
 excellent and useful, whatever is grand and 
 noble, magnificent or magnanimous, never 
 gives rise to the " Madness of Laughter." 
 
 6. But these are precisely the qualities 
 which produce human happiness, and there- 
 fore they are the qualities which should 
 universally abound. 
 
 7. In proportion as these qualities in- 
 crease and multiply, so will laughter 
 dwindle and diminish. When these qualities 
 become universal, laughter will expire. 
 
FOTJE MODIFICATIONS OF THE SAME 
 
 COUNTENANCE, 
 
 NAMELY, 
 
 1st. The natural and usual state of silent 
 thought or calm reflection. 
 
 2nd. A gentle smile under the influence of 
 kindly sensations. 
 
 3rd. Exhibiting the expression of moderate 
 laughter. 
 
 4th. Displaying the influence of hearty 
 laughter. 
 
 The four illustrations which follow are 
 engraved from photographs of a lady whom 
 nature and education have so favoured as to 
 place her above the average of her sex both 
 in intellect and accomplishments. 
 
First Portrait. 
 
 THE NATURAL AND USUAL STATE OF SILENT 
 THOUGHT OR CALM REFLECTION. 
 
The first portrait presents the counte- 
 nance in a state of repose, under the 
 influence of silent thought and calm 
 reflection. 
 
Second Portrait. 
 
 A GENTLE SMILE, UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF 
 KINDLY SENSATIONS. 
 
The second portrait exhibits the features 
 (under the influence of kindly sensations) 
 modified with a smile which may be appro- 
 priately termed the Ingenuous Smile, happily 
 illustrating the words of the poet — 
 
 " Her mouth, which a smile, 
 Devoid of all guile, 
 
 Half opened to view, 
 Is the bud of the rose, 
 In the morning that blows, 
 Impearled with the dew. 
 
 Old Ballad. 
 
Third Portrait. 
 
 EXHIBITING THE EXPRESSION OF MODERATE 
 LAUGHTER. 
 
The third portrait represents the face 
 during the action of moderate laughter, 
 caused by thoughts, words, or actions of 
 an incongruous, absurd, or ridiculous cha- 
 racter. This is invariably accompanied by 
 short jerking emissions of breath, giving 
 rise to a rapid succession of abrupt and 
 involuntary sounds which are neither 
 melodious nor agreeable. 
 
Fourth Portrait. 
 
 DISPLAYING THE INFLUENCE OF HEARTY 
 LAUGHTER. 
 
The fourth portrait displays the influence 
 of a hearty fit of laughter, which is inva- 
 riably caused by extravagant, outrageous, 
 and egregious nonsense. We go to see 
 the pantomime to enable us to realise this 
 extreme convulsion. 
 
APPENDIX, 
 
 COLLATERAL AND EXPLANATORY. 
 
 SECTION I. 
 
 On the various species of tickling, physical, 
 intellectual, and moral. 
 
 1. All gentle friction or rubbing of the 
 body may be classed under the generic term 
 of tickling, and may be appropriately de- 
 nominated 'physical tickling. 
 
 2. But the mind may be — and can be — * 
 and very frequently is — tickled quite as 
 effectually as is the physical organism. 
 
 3. The intellect is susceptible of being 
 tickled by ideas, and the moral faculties — in 
 
146 The Philosophy of 
 
 combination with, the intellect — can be 
 tickled on witnessing the representation of 
 certain actions, generally of a vulgar or im- 
 moral character. 
 
 4. Now it is very well known that every 
 species of physical, intellectual, or moral 
 tickling gives rise- — in a greater or less 
 degree — to those convulsive gaspings and 
 wrinkled distortions of the countenance 
 which characterise the phenomenon of 
 laughter. 
 
 5. The superficial nervous papillae are 
 tickled by physical contact of some foreign 
 substance, and then laughter is mechanically 
 induced, entirely without the concurrence or 
 accompaniment of either intellectual per- 
 ception or moral sensation. 
 
 6. The reading or oral recital of the 
 •details of any incongruous, absurd, or 
 grotesque transaction, or the recounting of 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 147 
 
 nonsensical, outrageous, or obscene incidents 
 or anecdotes, will tickle the intellect of those 
 whose intellects are effeminate, stunted, or 
 warped, or have not been properly trained ; 
 and the result will be cachinnations of a 
 more or less stentorious character, according 
 to the degree of piquancy in the description 
 or anecdote. 
 
 7. Again. The moral faculties of those 
 whose moral faculties are but slightly 
 influenced by any moral principles (and 
 these constitute all but a mere tithe of the 
 community) are stimulated by witnessing 
 the operations of any kind of practical jokes, 
 and then the vociferations of laughter are 
 loud and deep in proportion to the amount 
 of mischief, annoyance, or pain which the 
 practical joke may inflict upon the victim. 
 
 8. The intensity of the laughter at prac- 
 tical jokes generally reaches a higher obstre- 
 
148 The Philosophy of 
 
 perous pitch than the laughter occasioned 
 by any other stimulus. 
 
 9. Now let us seriously ask — what 
 amount of common sense, what amount of 
 benevolence, or of any other moral virtue, 
 can there exist in the minds of those who 
 are excited into boisterous raptures at the 
 exhibition of gratuitous mischief or reckless 
 cruelty ? 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 14.9 
 
 SECTION II. 
 
 Eemarks on the effects of physical tickling. — Quoted 
 from a French cyclopaedia. 
 
 1. Chatouillement, c'est-a-dire, tm at- 
 toucliement particulier qui porte sur la peau 
 une impression qui fait rire. 
 
 2. Mais si le chatouillement est long- 
 temps continue, l'impression augmente de 
 maniere quelle ebranle tres-disagreablement 
 les nerfs et la sensibilite. 
 
 3. La circulation et les mouvements 
 musculaires se font irregulierement — Fame 
 meme et la raison perdent leur empire. 
 
 4. Toute la machine est dans un etat 
 violent, qui est accompagne de cris de 
 
150 , The Philosophy of 
 
 douleur, de spasmes, de convulsions, de * 
 vomissements, de priapismes, d' evacuations 
 involuntaires de l'urine et de la semence ; 
 enfin, on a vu, plus d'une fois, cet etat 
 contre nature, suivi de la mort. 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 151 
 
 SECTION III. 
 
 On the extremely horrible and agonising condition 
 to which a huinan being can be reduced by 
 systematic tickling. 
 
 1. The following vivid description of the 
 exquisitely fiendish application of tickling 
 is an extract from the very interesting view 
 of modern society which is truly portrayed 
 in that remarkable production entitled 
 Valentine Vox, of which the principal and 
 most extraordinary incidents are founded on 
 facts concerning which the author (Mr. 
 Henry Cockton) made himself thoroughly 
 acquainted by personal investigation. 
 
 2. Mr. Goodman, the victim of the dia- 
 
152 The Philosophy of 
 
 bolical treatment about to be described, bad 
 been placed in a private lunatic asylum by 
 his own brother, on the altogether false 
 pretence that he was insane and incapable 
 of managing his affairs or taking care of 
 himself; the real and only object being to 
 possess his property. 
 
 3. Commissioners are legally appointed 
 to visit these private asylums to ascertain the 
 state of the inmates and to see that their 
 treatment is both judicious and humane. 
 
 4. It was on the occasion of one of these 
 visitations that the following scene oc- 
 curred : — 
 
 5. Mr. Goodman, who is aware that the 
 commissioners would shortly arrive, was 
 preparing to prove to them that he was in 
 the perfect possession of all his faculties, 
 and felt confident that he would succeed and 
 regain his liberty. 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 153 
 
 6, He had scarcely time to decide on the 
 commencement of his address before the 
 head keeper entered the yard where he was 
 Walking, and shouted to him — " Now then, 
 here, you ! This way — here — you're 
 Wanted!" 
 
 7& yfc $fc $fc 
 
 ; 7. Goodman joined him at once with the 
 utmost firmness. He felt that all depended 
 upon his tranquil bearing then, and hence 
 determined not to notice any indignity that 
 might be offered. 
 
 . 8. Instead, however, of being introduced 
 to the commissioners, who were appro- 
 priately taking wine in the drawing-room, 
 the keeper led him to the cell in which he 
 slept, and in which he found another keeper 
 loaded with an armful of chains. 
 
 " Now then !" shouted the principal ruf- 
 fian, " come, strip ! and look alive !" 
 
154 The Philosophy of 
 
 "Am I not to see the commissioners ?" 
 inquired Goodman calmly. ) 
 
 " And no mistake you are. They are 
 coming directly. So you'd better look sharp." 
 
 " Pray/' said Goodman, humbly yet 
 earnestly, " allow me to see them as. I am." 
 
 " Strip, I say, and be quick ! D'ye hear 
 me ? Come, I'm not going to stand all this 
 here dilly-dallying. Sam, here just lug off 
 his coat." And the fellow threw the chains 
 upon the ground and tore the coat off 
 accordingly. 
 
 " My good man, pray tell me your 
 m 
 
 " Silence !" interrupted the ruffian. " Hold 
 your mouth, or I'll make yer !" 
 
 The very moment the coat was off they 
 slipped on a strait- waistcoat, and then threw 
 him down upon the bed ; and while one of 
 them was fastening an iron collar round his 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 155 
 
 neck, and locking the chain attached to a 
 stanchion, the other was engaged in pulling 
 off his shoes and stockings, and chaining his 
 legs firmly to the bottom of the bed. 
 
 Goodman remained silent. " Let them 
 do what they please," thought he, " I shall 
 still have the power to speak to the commis- 
 sioners. Let them load me with chains. I 
 must not be excited." 
 
 The sleeves of the strait-waistccat were 
 now tied to the bedstead on either side ; his 
 bare feet were chained securely ; he was 
 unable to move hand or foot ; he had not 
 even the power to raise his head. 
 
 " Now," said the principal ruffian, ad- 
 dressing his assistant, " do you go down, and 
 let me know when they're a-coming." 
 
 The fellow obeyed, and the moment he 
 had done so the keeper deliberately drew a 
 feather from his breast, and having straight- 
 
156 The Philosophy of 
 
 ened it, and looked at it with an air of the 
 most intense satisfaction, knelt down at the 
 foot of the bed. 
 
 " "What, in Heavens name," thought 
 Goodman, " is about to take place ? My 
 good man/' he exclaimed, in a state of 
 alarm, "what — what are you going to do 
 with me ?" 
 
 Scarcely had the last word been uttered 
 when the miscreant began to tickle the soles 
 of his victim's feet. 
 
 "Oh! oh!" exclaimed Goodman. "Oh 
 Do not ! Pray do not ! Oh, God ! I can- 
 not endure it! Mercy! Murder! Murder! 
 Murder !" And he struggled and shrieked ; 
 and the more he shrieked and struggled the 
 more quickly was the feather applied. 
 
 The blood rushed to his head. He strained 
 horribly. The torture was exquisite. His 
 cries might have pierced the heart even of a 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 157 
 
 fiend; yet that wretch still kept on the 
 dreadful process. " My God ! my God VI 
 exclaimed Goodman. "What agony V 9 
 
 These were the last words he consciously 
 uttered ; for the veins began to swell, and 
 his face became black, and his eyes appeared 
 to be in the act of starting from their sockets. 
 The room shook with his convulsions. He 
 raved with maniacal fury. In a word, he 
 had been goaded to madness. 
 
 " They are here ! — they are here !" said 
 the assistant, rushing into the room. 
 
 " All right — I've done the trick V 9 said 
 the miscreant, concealing the feather, and 
 throwing a blanket over the feet of his 
 victim. 
 
 The commissioners entered. Goodman 
 was a maniac, laughing and raving 
 alternately — torturing his features into 
 shapes the most hideous — writhing with 
 
158 The Philosophy of 
 
 frightful energy to get loose, and screaming 
 horribly. V. 
 
 " Here is the poor -man/' observed the 
 humane proprietor with an expression of the 
 purest sympathy. " Poor gentleman! Eeally 
 it is enough to make one's heart bleed to see 
 him." 
 
 i " Dreadful !" criedone of the commissioners. 
 ' " Dreadful indeed !" exclaimed another. 
 
 " Poor fellow ! Is he often thus ?" in- 
 quired a third. 
 
 "Not very often so out-and-out bad, sir," 
 replied the brutal keeper ; " only about twice 
 a week, and he's much to be pitied. There 
 aint a patient I pities more than him." 
 And he winked at the proprietor, and the 
 proprietor winked at him, as the commis- 
 sioners drew near to the bedside, while poor 
 Goodman was shouting, " Villains ! — murder ! 
 — fiends !" He was mad — raving mad ! 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 159 
 
 The commissioners were satisfied. Accus- 
 tomed as they had been to such scenes, this 
 struck them with horror, and they pre- 
 pared to leave the room. 
 
 "It's shocking when they are so/' ob- 
 served the Christian proprietor, " truly 
 shocking. Take care of him, Johnson ; treat 
 him tenderly, poor man 1" 
 
 " I will, sir, depend on't," replied the 
 keeper ; and the commissioners quitted the 
 room much affected. 
 
 The very moment they had left the 
 miscreant burst into a loud roar of laughter, 
 and congratulated himself on the success of 
 his brutal experiment. He had tried it 
 before frequently ; and although one of his 
 victims had died under the dreadful opera- 
 tion, while another had been struck with 
 paralysis, and a third had been reduced to a 
 state of idiotcy, in which he continued till 
 
 
160 The Philosophy of 
 
 . . i - a . 
 
 death, it had occasionally so far failed as to 
 induce almost immediate exhaustion, which 
 had been found not to answer the proposed 
 end so well. 
 
 In this case, however, he had been per* 
 fectly successful, and therefore, after having 
 remained in the room until the commissioners 
 had quitted the asylum, he left his raving 
 victim with a fiend-like smile, to receive the 
 applause of his infamous master. 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 161 
 
 SECTION IV. 
 
 On Mr. Darwin's opinions respecting laughter. 
 
 1. Mb,. Darwin discusses the subject of 
 laughter at considerable length in his 
 extremely interesting volume on the 
 Expression of the Emotions. 
 
 2. He there declares (p. 119) that idiots 
 and imbecile persons afford good evidence 
 that laughter or smiling primarily expresses 
 mere happiness or joy. 
 
 3. He says — "Dr. Crichton Browne in- 
 forms me that with idiots laughter is the 
 most prevalent and frequent of all the 
 emotional expressions. 
 
 4. " Many idiots are morose, passionate, 
 restless, in a painful state of mind, or utterly 
 
162 The Philosophy of 
 
 stolid, and these never laugh. Others fre- 
 quently laugh in a quite senseless manner. 
 
 5. " There is another large class of idiots 
 who are persistently joyous and benign, and 
 who are constantly laughing or smiling. 
 Their countenances often exhibit a stereo- 
 typed smile. 
 
 6. "Their joyousness is increased, and 
 they grin, chuckle, or giggle whenever food 
 is placed before them, or when they are 
 caressed, or are shown bright colours, or hear 
 music. 
 
 7. " Some of them laugh more than usual 
 when they walk about or attempt any mus- 
 cular exertion. 
 
 8. "The joyousness of most of these idiots 
 cannot possibly be associated (as Dr. Browne 
 remarks) with any distinct ideas; they 
 simply feel pleasure, and express it by 
 laughter or smiles." 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 163 
 
 . 9. Our sincere conviction, after much 
 experience and consideration, compels us 
 to dissent from the opinion which is so 
 distinctly expressed and reiterated in the 
 above extract — namely, that laughter in 
 idiots " primarily expresses mere happiness 
 or joy;" — "they simply feel pleasure, and 
 express it by laughter." 
 
 10. On the contrary, we are rather in- 
 clined to think that, on a careful and critical 
 analysis of our various states of consciousness 
 under any circumstances, it will be found 
 that the experience of happiness, joy, or even 
 pleasure (properly so called), never does mani- 
 fest itself by bursts or fits of laughter. 
 
 In well-balanced and intelligent minds it 
 certainly never does . We leave ill-regulated, 
 ignorant, and vulgar minds altogether out 
 of the question as not being fit subjects to 
 reason upon or draw any inference from. 
 
164 The Philosophy of 
 
 11. The fact appears simply to be this — 
 that in the case of every form of idiotcy the 
 brain and nervous system are irretrievably 
 diseased or deranged; the thoughts (if 
 thoughts they may be called) are altogether 
 irrational; the feelings are perverted and 
 unnatural. 
 
 12. Under these circumstances, and in 
 such a state of affliction, what kind or degree 
 of happiness, or joy, or pleasure can possibly 
 be realised? 
 
 13. They can unquestionably feel hunger 
 and thirst, and experience painful sensations, 
 but they can scarcely be said to think ; and 
 what pleasure, may we ask, or what enter- 
 tainment can a human being enjoy who does 
 not possess the power of thought ? He can 
 barely have a consciousness of his existence, 
 if even that. 
 
 14. In the foregoing extract from Mr. 
 
Laughter and Smiling. 165 
 
 Darwin laughing is shown to be a striking 
 characteristic of idiotcy, and this exactly 
 corroborates the theory set up in the preceding 
 chapters of this treatise. 
 
 1 5. Sensible people — as may be observed 
 every day — seldom laugh ; and there are all 
 degrees of laughers, from the wise and deco- 
 rous, who rarely laugh, to the weak-minded 
 fools, who very frequently laugh. 
 
 16. The laughing propensity gradually 
 increases, in the same proportion as the 
 weakness of mind increases, until we arrive 
 at the lowest stage of mental vacuity, in 
 which the habit of laughing becomes per- 
 manent and incessant. 
 
 17. It must be borne in mind that all 
 the idiots and imbeciles who are referred 
 to in Mr. Darwin's remarks were recklessly 
 tomfooled in their infancy (in common 
 with other children) by monkey tricks, 
 
166 Philosophy of Laughter and Smiling. 
 
 buffoonery, and tickling to make them 
 laugh. 
 
 18. They thus got into the habit of laugh- 
 ing at an early age, and not possessing 
 rational minds, they could not, of course, 
 acquire any rational habits. 
 
 19. The silly, unmeaning habit of laugh- 
 ing, therefore, constitutes their only habit, 
 and being so frequently exercised, becomes 
 strengthened and inveterate, and, conse- 
 quently, persistent and incessant. 
 
 LONDON: 
 HUNTED EY JAS. WADE, TAVISTOCK STREET, COVENT GARDEN. 
 

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