UNIVERSITY OF MICHIGAN
SI. QUÆRIS-PENINSULAM-AMENAM.
CIRCUMSPICE
3
1837
SCIENTIA
ARTES
UNTUMUNUNIANINMITTENULUI
1
VERITAS
LIBRARY
OF THE
1
PLURIBUS UNUMI
MO
7
TLEBOR
원
​$
1
8
.
-
WOUUOOUU.
GIFT OF
REGENT LL HUBBARD
$
i
IIIIII
3
2
Hubbard
Imag. Voy.
,
GULLIVER
REVIVED;
OR THE SINGULAR
TRAVELS, CAMPAIGNS, VOYAGES,
and ADVENTURES
BARON MUNIKHOUSON,
COMMONLY CALLED
M U NCH AUSEN:
THE THIRD EDITION, confiderably enlarged,
and ornamented with a number of Views:
engraved from the Original Deſigns.
OXFORD:
Printed for the EDITOR and Sold by G. KEARSLEY
at No. 46.in FLEET-STEET, 1786:
[ ]
P R E F A C E
TO THE
FIRST EDITION.
B
ARON MUNIKHOU-
D SON, or MUNCHAU-
SON, of Bodenweder, near
Hameln on the Weſer, belongs
to the noble family of that
name,
ſü ]
name, which gave to the king's
German dominions the late
prime miniſter, and ſeveral
other public characters equally
illuſtrious. He is a man of
great original humour ; and
having found that prejudic-
ed minds cannot be seaſon-
ed into common ſenſe, and
that bold affertors are very apt
to bully their audience out
of it; he never argues with
either of them, but adroitly
turns the converſation upon
indifferent topics and then
tells
(iii)
tells a ſtory of his travels, cam-
paigns, and adventures, in
a manner peculiar to himn-
ſelf, and well calculated to
awaken and put
to ſhame
the practice of lying, or, as
it is politely called, drawing
the long Bow.
As this method has been
often attended with good ſuc-
ceſs, we beg leave to lay ſome
of his ſtories before the Public,
and requeſt thoſe who fall into
the company of notorious
bouncers
[ iv )
bouncers to exerciſe the ſame
upon every proper occaſion,
i. e. where people ſeriouſly
advance the moſt notorious
fallhoods under an appearance
of truth, by which they in-
jure themſelves and deceive
others.
ADVER
[ v ]
ADVERTISEMENT
TO THE
SECOND EDITION.
THE rapid demand for
HE
7
the firſt edition of this
little pamphlet is a proof that
the Public have ſeen it's moral
tendency in a proper light :
perhaps
[ vi
}
perhaps it ſhould have been
called with more propriety
The LYAR's MONITOR,
no vice is more contempti-
ble than a habit of abuſing
the ears of our friends with
falfhoods.
The Baron is himſelf a man
of great honor, and takes de-
light in expoſing thoſe who
are addicted to deceptions of
every kind, which he does
with
I vii )
with great pleaſantry by re-
lating the ſtories in large com-
panies now preſented to the
Public in this little collection,
which is conſiderably enriched
by his Naval or Sea Adven.
tures, and alſo embelliſhed with
plates.
London April 20, 1786.
The Second impreſſion was diſpoſed
of with ſuch rapidity that a THIRD
EDITION become neceſſary within
three weeks of the appearance of
the former.
The additions are ſe conſiderable,
both with reſpect to the Narrative
and
( viji ]
j
and the Plates that it may fairly
be conſidered as a new Work.
In the preface to Gulliver's Travels,
which is a fine piece of irony, me find
the following paſſage.
" There is an air of truth apparent
- through the whole of theſe travels
66 and indeed the author was ſo dif
tinguiſhed for the veracity that it
“ became a ſort of proverb among
“ his neighours when any one affirmed
“ a thing it was as true as if Mr.
« Gulliver had ſpoke it.'
The Editor of theſe adventures
humbly hopes, they will alſo be received
with the ſame marks of reſpect, and
the exclamation of THAT'S A MUN-
CHAUSEN given hereafter to every
article of authentic intelligence.
May 18th, 1786.
THE
( 5 )
TH E
SINGULAR TRAVELS, &c. *.
I ne
SET off from home on my jour-
ney to Ruſſia, in the midſt of
winter, from a juſt notion that
froſt and ſnow muſt of courſe mend
the roads, which every traveller
had deſcribed, as uncommonly bad
* The Baron is fuppoſed to relate theſe ex-
traordinary adventures over his bottle, when fur-
rounded by his friends.
B
through
3
( 6 )
but lightly
through the northern parts of Ger-
many, Poland, Courland, and Li-
vonia. I went on horſeback, which,
provided mare and rider are in order,
is the moſt convenient manner of
travelling. I I was
cloathed, of this, I felt the incon-
venience, the more I advanced
north-eaſt. What muſt not a poor
old man have ſuffered in that ſevere
weather and climate, whom I ſaw
on a bleak common, in Poland,
lying on the road, helpleſs, ſhiver-
ing, and hardly having wherewith-
all to cover his nakedneſs.
I pitied the poor ſoul. Though
I felt exceedingly cold myſelf, I
threw
(7)
threw
my
mantle over hins and im-
mediately I heard a voice from the
heavens, bleſſing me for that piece
of charity, ſaying,
“ You will be rewarded, my ſon,
“ for this in time"
I went on : night and darkneſs
overtook me. No village was to
be ſeen. The country was covered
with ſnow, and I was unacquaint-
ed with the roads.
Tired, I alighted at laſt, and faft.
ened my horſe to ſomething of a
pointed ſtump of a tree, which ap-
peared above the ſnow. For the
fake of ſafety I placed my piſtols un-
B 2
der
( 8 )
der my arm, and lay down in the
ſnow, not far off, where I ſlept to
foundly, that I did not open my
eyes till it was full day light.
Great was my aſtoniſhment now, to
find myſelf in the midſt of a village,
lying in the church-yard. Nor was
my horſe to be ſeen, but I heard
him foon after neigh, fomewhere
above me. On looking upwards, I
beheld him tied and hanging to the
weather cock of the ſteeple. Mat-
ters were now very plain to me:
the village had been covered with
ſnow that night; a ſudden change
of weather had taken place; I liad
funk down to the church-yard
whilft aſleep, gently, and in the
ſame
lirirl.
Pa. 40.
Pa 21.
Path
SIA THAILAREN FARAL AT BAKALAU TAKAITALAUTOR
m! UiTTIILIT ITTIN
141
LL LLL
MALE
innehausuri
prinsil
.
Tingular. Idrentures related in the Travels of Baron Mumchanin
Hhheishil as the Aet directe for lihvarsley e mild at 45.40, inilul Alirol, i April 2012.1786.
(9)
fame proportion as the ſnow had
melted away, and what in the dark
I had taken to be a ſtump of a little
tree appearing above the ſnow, to
which I had tied my horſe, proved
to have been the croſs or weather-
cock of the ſteeple.
Without long conſideration I took
one of my piſtols, shot off the halter,
brought down the horſe and pro .
ceeded on my journey.
He carried me well-yet advanc-
ing into Ruſſia, where travelling on
horſeback his rather unfaſhionable
in winter; I ſubmitted, as I always
do, to the cuſtom of the country,
took
B3
( 10 )
took a ſingle horfe Nedge, and drove
briſkly on towards St. Peterſburgh.
I do not exactly recollect whether
it was in Eſthland or Jugemanland,
but I remember that in the midſt of
a dreary foreſt, ſomewhere there-
abouts, I ſpied a terrible wolf
making after me, with all the ſpeed
of ravenous winter hunger. He
foon overtook me. There was no
poſſibility of eſcape. Mechanically
I laid myſelf down flat in the fledge.
and let my horſe run for our ſafety.
What I apprehended, but hardly
hoped or expected, happened imme-
diately after. The woif did not
mind me in the leaſt, but took a
leap over me, and falling furioully
on
(11)
on the horſe, began inſtantly to
tear and devour the hind part of the
poor animal, which ran the faſter
for his pain and terror.
Thus un-
noticed and ſafe myſelf, I lifted my
head ſlily up, and with horror I
beheld that the wolf had atė
his way into the horſe's body. It
was not long before he had fairly
forced himſelf into it; then I took
my advantage, fell upon him with
the but-end of my whip. This un-
expected attack in his rear, frighten-
ed him ſo much; he leaped forward
with all his might; the horſe's car-
cafe dropt on the ground; but in his
place the wolf was in the harneſs,
and I, on my part, whipping him
continually
( 12 )
continually, we both arrived, in
full career, ſafe at St. Peterſburgh,
contrary to our reſpective expecta-
tions, and very much to the aſto-
niſhment of the beholders.
I ſhall not tire you, gentlemen,
with the politics, arts, ſciences,
and hiſtory of this magnificent me-
tropolis of Ruſſia; nor trouble
you
with the various intrigues, and
pleaſing adventures I had in the
politer circles of that country:
where the lady of the houſe always
receives the viſitor with a dram
and à ſalute. I ſhall confine my-
ſelf rather to the greater and nobler
objects
( 13 )
objects of your attention, to horſe
and dogs, of which I have always
been fond, alſo to foxes, wolves and
bears, of which, and other games
Ruffia abounds more than any other
part of the world, and to ſuch ſport
manly exerciſes, and feats of gal-
lantry and activity as ſhow the
Gentleman, better than muſty Greek
or Latin, or all the perfume, finery
and capers of French wits or hair-
dreffers.
It was ſometime before I could
obtain a commiſſion in the army,
and for ſeveral months I was pers
fectly at liberty to ſport away my
time and money in the moſt Gen-
tleman
( 14 )
You may
tleman like manner.
eaſily imagine, that I ſpent much
of both, out of town, with ſuch
gallant fellows, as knew how to
make the moſt of an open unincloſed
It is a pleaſing
remembrance, both for the variety
of ſport it afforded, and for the
remarkable ſucceſs I met with in
purſuit of the fame.
foreſt country.
One morning I ſaw through the
windows of my bed room, that a
large pond, not far off, was, as it
were, covered with wild ducks. In
an inſtant I took my gun from the
corner, ran down ſtairs, and out of
the houſe in ſuch a hurry, that im-
prudently
(.15 )
prudently I ſtruck my face againſt the
door poſt. Fire, light, and ſparks,
flew out of my eyes, but it did not
prevent my intention. I ſoon came
within ſhot, when levelling my
piece, I obſerved to my ſorrow,
that even the flint had ſprung from
the cock, by the violence of the
ſhock I had juſt received. There
was no time to be loſt. I preſent-
ly remembered the effect it had
upon my eyes, therefore opened the
pan, levelled my piece againſt the
wild fowls, and my fiſt againſt
one of my eyes. A hearty blow
drew ſparks again, the ſhot went
off, and I had fifty brace of ducks,
twenty widgeons, and three couple of
teäls
( 16 )
teals. Preſence of mind is the ſoul.
of manly exerciſes. If ſoldiers and
ſailors owe to it many of their lucky
eſcapes, hunters and ſportſman are
not leſs beholden to it for many of
their ſucceſſes. In a noble foreſt
party in Ruſſia, I met a fine black
fox, whoſe valuable ſkin it would
have been a pity to tear by ball or
ſhot. Reynard ſtood cloſe to a tree.
In a twinkling I took out my ball,
and placed a good ſpike nail in its
room, fired and hit him ſo cleverly,
that I nailed his bruſh faſt to the
I now went up to him, tock
out my hanger, gave him a croſs
cut over the face, laid hold of my
whip
tree.
(17)
whip and fairly flogged him out of
his fine ſkin!
Chance and good luck often cor-
rect our miſtakes : of this I had a
ſingular inſtance foon after, when
in the depth of a foreft I ſaw a
wild pig and fow running cloſe
behind each other. My ball had
miſſed them, yet the foremoſe pig
only run away, and the fow ſtood
motionleſs as fixed to the ground.
On examining into the matter I
found the latter one to be an old
ſow, blind with age, which ha
taken hold of her pig's, tail, in order
to be led along by filial duty... My
ball having paſſed between the two,
С
had
( 18 )
had cut his leading ſtring, which
the old ſow continued to hold in
her mouth, and as her former guide
did not draw her on any longer, the
had ſtopt of courſe; I therefore
laid hold of the remaining end of
the pig's tail, and led the old beaſt
home without any farther trouble
on my part, and without any re-
luctance or apprehenſion on the part
of the helpleſs old animal.
Terrible as theſe wild ſows are,
yet more fierce and dangerous are
the boars, one of which I had once
the misfortune to meet in a foreſt
unprepared for attack or defence. .
I retired behind an oak tree, juſt
when
( 19 )
you now
when the furious animal levelled a
fide cut at me, with ſuch force,
that his tuſks pierced through the
tree, by which means he could nei-
ther repeat the blow nor retire.--
Ho! ho! thought I, I ſhall ſoon
have now — and immediately I
laid hold of aſtone, wherewith I
hammered and bent his tulks in ſuch
a manner that he could not retreat
by any means, and muſt wait my
return from the next village, whither
I went for ropes and a cart, to fe-
cure him properly, and to carry
him
off ſafe and alive, which perfectly
fucceeded.
C2
You
( 20 )
You have heard, I dare ſay, of
the hunter's and ſportſman's ſaint
and protector, Saint Hubert; and
of the noble ſtag, which appeared
to him in the foreſt, with the holy
croſs between his antlers. I have
paid my homages to that ſaint every
year in good fellowſhip, and
ſeen this ſtag a thouſand times,
either painted in churches or em-
broidered in the
the ſtars of his
knights ; ſo that upon the honour
and conſcience of a good ſportſman,
I hardly know whether there may
not have been formerly, or whether
there are not ſuch croffed ſtags, even
at this preſent day. But let me ra-
ther tell what I have ſeen iyſelf.
Having
( 21 )
Having one day ſpent all my ſhot
I found myſelf unexpectedly in pre-
fence of a ſtately ſtag, looking at
me as unconcernedly, as if he had
known of my empty pouches. I
charged immediately with powder
and upon it a good handful of
cherry-ſtones, for I had fuck-
ed the fruit as far as the hurry would
permit. Thus I let fly at him, and
hit hin juſt on the middle of the
forehead, between his antlers. Lt
ftunned him-he ſtaggered—yet he
made off. A year or two after, I
being with a party in the ſame foreſt
I beheld a noble ſtag with
a fine full-grown cherry-tree above
ten feet high between his ant-
C3
lers
( 22 )
upon him
ز
lers. I immediately recollected my
former adventure, looked
as my property, and brought him to
the ground by one ſhot, which at
once gave me the haunch and cher-
ryſauce ; for the tree was covered
with the richeſt fruit, the like I
never had taſted before. Who
knows but ſome paſſionate holy
ſportſman or ſporting abbot or bi-
ſhip, may have ſhot, planted and
fixed the croſs between the antlers
of Saint Hubert's ſtag in a manner
ſimilar to this : they always have
been and ſtill are famous for plan-
tations of croſſes and antlers ; and
in a caſe of diſtreſs or dilemma,
which too often happens to keen
ſportſmen
( 23 )
ſportſmen, one is apt to graſp at any
thing for ſafety, and to try any
expedient rather than miſs the fa-
vourable opportunity. I have
times found myſelf in that trying
ſituation.
I have many
What do you ſay of this for ex-
ample ? Daylight and powder were
ſpent one day in a Poliſh foreſt.
When I was going home, a terrible
bear made up to me in great ſpeed
with open mouth, ready to fall upon
me all
my pockets were ſearched
in an inſtant for powder and ball,
but in vain-I found nothing but
two ſpare flints; one I flung with
all
my might into the monſter's
open
jaws,
;
( 24 )
It gave
jaws, down his throat.
him pain, and made him turn about
ſo that I could level the ſecond at
his back-door, which, indeed I
did with wonderful ſucceſs, for it
flew in, met the firſt fint in the
ſtomach, ſtruck fire, and blew up
the bear with a terrible exploſion.
Though I came fafe off that time;
yet I ſhould not wiſh to try it again
or venture againit Bears with no
other defence.
There is a kind of fatality in it.
The fierceſt and moſt dangerous
animals, generally came upon me
when defenceleſs, as if they had a
notion or foreſight of it by way of
inſtinct.
( 25 )
inſtinct. Thus a frightful wolf
ruſhed upon me ſo ſuddenly, and ſo
cloſe that I could do nothing but
follow mechanical inſtinct, and
thruſt my fiſt into his open mouth.
For ſafety's fake I puſhed on and on,
till my arm was fairly in, up to the
Thoulder. How ſhould I diſengage
myſelf; I was not much pleaſed
with my aukward ſituation-with
a wolf face to face-our ogling was
not of the moſt pleaſant kind. If
I withdrew my arm, then the ani-
mal would fly the more furiouly
upon me; that, I ſaw in his flaming
eyes. In ſhort, I laid hold of his
entrails, turned him inſide out, like a
glove,
( 26 )
glove, and Aung him'to the ground,
where I left him:
The ſame expedient would not
have anſwered againſt a mad dog,
which foon after came running a-
gainſt me in a narrow ſtreet at St.
Peterſburgh. Run who can, I
thought; and the better to run I
threw off my fur cloak, and was
fafe within doors in an inſtant. I
ſent my ſervant for the cloak, and
he
put it in the wardrobe with my
other cloaths. The day after I was
amazed and frightened by Jack's
bawling : « for God's ſake, Sir,
your fur cloak is mad !” I haſtened
up to bim, and found almoſt all
my
6
( 27 )
my cloaths toſſed about and torn to
pieces. The fellow was perfectly
right in his apprehenſions about the
fur cloak's madneſs. I ſaw him
myſelf juſt then falling upon a fine
full-dreſs ſuit, which he ſhook and
toffed in an unmerciful manner.
All theſe narrow and lucky ef-
capes Gentlemen, were chances
turned to advantage, by preſence of
mind and vigorous exertions; which
taken together, as every body knows,
makes the forrunate ſportſman, fai-
lor and ſoldier ; but he would be
a very blameable and imprudent
ſportſman, admiral, or genǝral, who
would always depend upon chance
and
( 28 )
and his ſtars, without troubling
himſelf about thoſe arts which are
their particular purſuits, and with-
out providing the very beſt imple-
nents, which inſure ſucceſs. I was
hot blameable either way; for I
have always been as remarkable for
he excellency of my horſes, dogs,
guns and ſwords, as for the proper
manner of uſing and managing
them, ſo that upon the whole I may
hope to be remembered in the foreſt,
upon the turf, and in the field. I
ſhall not enter here into any detail
of my ſtables, kennel; or
armcury
but a favourite dog' of mine I cannot
help mentioning to you. It was a
greyhound. I never had or faw.a
better
( 29 )
better one. He grew old in my
fer
vice, and was not remarkable for his
ſize, but rather for his uncom-
mon ſwiftneſs. I always courſed with
him. Had you feen him, you muſt
have admired him, and would not
have wondered at my predilection,
and at my courſing him ſo much. He
run ſo faſt, ſo much, and fo long in
my ſervice, that he actually run off
his legs, ſo that in the latter part of
his life, I was under the neceſſity of
working and uſing him only as a
terrier, in which quality he ftill
ſerved me many years.
Whilſta greyhound he changed his
ſex! yes gentlemen, this he, became à
D
the
(305)
with pups,
fh3! a bitch ! ſhe courſed one day'a
hare, which appeared to me un-
commonly big. I pitied my poor
bitch, the was big with
yet fhe would courſe as faſt as ever.
I could follow her on horſeback
only at a great diſtance. At once
I heard a ery as it were of a pack of
hounds--být ſo weak and faint,
that I hardly knew what to make
of it. Coming up at laſt I was
greatly ſurpriſed. The hare had
áttered in running; the ſame had
happened to my bitch in courſing--
and there were juſt as many leverets
as pups. By inſtinct the former
run, the latter courſed, and thus, I
found myſelf in poffeffion at once
of ſix hares, and as many dogs, at
tha
( 31.)
the end of a courſe, which had
only began with one.
I reinember this, my wonderful
bitch; with the faine pleaſure and
tenderneſs, as a ſuperb Lithunian
horfe, which no money could have
bought. He became mine by an ac-
cident, which gave me an opportu-
nity of ſhewing my horſemanſhip
to a great advantage. I was at Count
Przobofsky's noble country feat in
Lithuania, and remained with the
ladies at tea, in the drawing-room,
while the gentlemen were down in
the yard, to ſee a young horſe of
blood, which was juſt arrived from
the Aud. We ſuddenly heard a noiſe
D 2
of
( 32 )
of diſtreſs. I haftened down ſtairs,
and found the horſe ſo unruly that
nobody durſt approach or mount
him. The moſt reſoluté horſemen
ſtood diſinayed and aghaſt : deſpon-
dency was expreſſed in every coun-
tenance, when in one leap I was
on his back, frightened him by
ſurprize, and worked him quite into
gentleneſs and obedience, with the
beſt diſplay of horſemanſhip I was
master of. Fully to thew this to
the ladies, and fave them unneceſſary
frouble, I forced him to leap in at
one of the open windows of the tea
room, walked round ſeveral times,
pace, trot, and gallop; and at lait
made him mount the tea-table, there
6
to
Page 32
TZ
Publiſhed according to Act of Parliament, May 26,1786,
by G Kearſley Fleet Street, London.
Page 33
مت
Trebliſhed according W „Ict of Parliament willqv 20,1780. év v:hcarjlev, H'leet Strel London
( 33 )
cer.
to repeat his leſſons, in a pretty
ſtyle of miniature, which was ex-
ceedingly pleaſing to the ladies, for
he perforined them amazingly well,
and did not break either cup or fau-
It placed me ſo high in the
opinion of the ladies, and ſo well in
that of the noble lord, that with
his uſual politeneſs he begged I
would accept of thip young horfe,
and ride him full carder to conqueſt
and honour, in the campaign againſt
the Turks, which was foon fo be
opened, under the command of
Count Munich.
I could not indeed have received
& more agreeable preſent;' ñor a 'nore
ominous
D 3
( 34 )
ominous one at the opening of that
campaign, in which I made
my
apprenticeſhip as a ſoldier. A horſe
fo gentle, lo ſpirited, and ſo fierce
at once a lamb and a Bucephalus,
put me always in mind of the fol-
dier's and the gentleman's duty, of
young Alexander, and of the aſto-
niſhing things he performed in the
field.
We took the field, among feve-
ral other reaſons it ſeems, with an
intention to retrieve the character
of the Ruffian arms, which had
been blemiſhed a little by Czar
Peter's laſt campaign on the Pruth:
and this we fully accompliſhed by.
ſeveral
( 35 )
ſeveral very fatiguing and glorious
campaigns under the command of
that great general I mentioned be-
fore.
Modeſty forbids individuals to ar“.
rogate to themſelves great ſuccef-
ſes or victories, the glory of which
is generally engroſſed by the com-
mander, nay, which is rather awk-
ward, by kings and queens, who
never ſmelt gun-powder, but at the
field days and reviews of their
troops: never ſaw a field of battle
or an enemy in battle
array.
:
Nor do I claim any particular
faare of glory in the great engage-
ments
( 36 )
ments with the enemy. We all
did our duty, which, in the patriot’s,
ſoldier's, and gentleman's language,
is a very comprehenfive word of
great honour, meaning and import,
and of which the generality of idle
quidnuncs and coffee-houſe poli-
ticians, can any hardly form any but
a very mean and contemptible idea.
However, having had the command
of a body of huzzars, I went upon
ſeveral expeditions, with diſcreti-
onary powers; and the ſucceſs I then
met with, is, I think, fairly, and
only to be put to my account, and
to that of the brave fellows whom
I led to 'conqueſt and to victory,
We had very hot work once in the
ز
van
( 37 )
van of the army, when we drove
the Turks into Oczackow. My
ſpirited Lithuanian had almoit
brought me into a ſcrape. I had
an advanced forepoſt, and ſaw the
enemy coming againſt me in a cloud
of duſt, which left me rather un-
certain about their actual numbers
and real intentions. To wrap my-
ſelf up in a ſimilar cloud of duſt
was common prudence, but would
not have much advanced my know-
ledge, or anſwered the end for
which I had been ſent out. There-
fore I let nsy flankers on both wings
ſpread to the right and left, and
make what duft they could, and I
myſelf led on ſtraight upon the ene-
my,
( 38 )
my, to have a nearer fight of thern;
in this I was gratificd for they
ſtood and fought, till for fear of
my flankers they began to move off
rather diſorderly. "I his was the
moment to fall upon them with ſpi-
rit-We broke them entirely, made
à terrible havock amonſt them
and drove them not only back to a
walled town in their rear, but even
through it, contrary to our moſt fan-
guine expectation.
By reaſon of the ſwiftneſs of my
Lithuanian I had been foremoſt in
the purſuit, ånd ſeeing the enemy
fairly Aying through the oppoſite
gate, I thought it would be prudent
to
( 39 )
to ſtop in the market-place to order,
the trumpet to rendezvous. I ſtopt,
gentlemen, butjudge of my aſtoniſh-
ment, when in this market-place
I ſaw neither trumpet nor any living
body of my huzzars about me. Are
they ſcouring this other ſtreets ? or
what is became of them? they could
not be far off, and muſt, at all
events, foon join me.
In that ex-
pection I walked my panting Li-
thuanian to a ſpring in this market-
place, and let him drink. He drank
uncommonly—with an eagerneſs
not to be ſatisfied, but natural
enough, for when I looked round
for my men, what ſhould I fee, gen-
tleman ? the hind part of the poor
creature,
( 40 )
creature, croup and legs were miſ-
ſing, as if he had been cut in two,
and the water run out as it came in,
without either refreſhing him or
doing him any good. How it could
have happened was quite a myſtery
to me, till I returned with him to
the town gate. There I ſaw that
when I ruſhed in pell-mell with
the flying enemy, they had dropt the
port-cullis*, unperceived by me,
which had totally cut off his hind
part, that lay ſtill quivering on the
outſide of the gate. It would have
been an irreparable loſs. had not
• A heavy falling door with ſharp ſpikes at the
bottom, ler down ſuddenly to prevent the entrance
of an enemy into a fortificd town,
our
( 41 )
our farrier contrived to bring both
parts together while hot. He fewed
them up with ſprigs and young
ſhoots of laurels that were juſt at
hand--the wound healed, and what
could not have happened but to fe
glorious a horſe, the ſprigs took
root in his body, grew up, and
formed a bower over me, ſo that
afterwards I could go upon many
other expeditions in the ſhade of my
own and my horſe's laurels.
But, gentlemen, for all that I
was not always ſucceſsful. I had
the misfortune to be overpowered
by numbers, to be made priſoner
of war; and what is worfe, but ale
E
way
( 42 )
ways uſual among the Turks *, to be
fold for a llave. In that ſtate of
humilitation, my daily taſk was not
Very hard and laborious, but ra-
ther fingular and irkſome. It was to
drive the ſultan's bees every morn-
ing to their paſture grounds, to at-
tend them all the day long, and
againſt night to drive them back to
their hives. One evening I miſſed
a bee, and ſoon obſerved that two
bears had fallen upon her, to tear
her to pieces for the honey ſhe car-
ried. I had nothing like an offen-
five weapon in my hands, but the
ſilver hatchet, which is the badge
* The Baron was afterwards in great favour
with the Grand Seignior, as will appear hereafter.
of
( 43 )
of the ſultan's gardeners aød far-
mers. I threw it at the robbers
with an intention to frighten them
away, and let the poor bee at liberty ;
but by an unlucky turn of my arm,
it flew upwards and continued rifing
till it reached the moon. How
ſhould I recover it ? How fetch it
down again? I recollected that Tur-
key beans.grew very quick, and run
up to an aſtoniſhing height. I
planted one immediately, it grew
and actually faſtened itſelf to one
of the moon's horns. I had no
more to do now, but to climb up
by it into the moon where I ſafely
arrived, I had a troubleſome piece
of work of it, before I could find
E 2
my
( 44 )
my ſilver hatchet in a place where
every thing has the brightneſs of
ſilver, at laſt, however, I found it
in a heap of chaff and chopped ſtraw.
I was now for returning, but alas,
the heat of the ſun had dried up my
Bean; it was totally uſeleſs for my
deſcent; fo I fell to work and
twiſted me a rope of that chopped
itraw, as long and as well as I could
make it. : This I faſtened to one of
the moon's horns, and ſlid down
to the end of it. Here I held
my-
ſelf faſt: with the left hand, and
with the hatchet in my right, I cut
the long, row uſeleſs end of the
upper part, which then tied to
the lower end brought me a good
deal
( 45 )
deal lower. This repeated ſp licin
and tying of the ropes did not improve
its quality nor bring me down to the
Sultan's farms. I was four or five
miles from the earth at leaſt when it
broke ; I fell to the ground with
ſuch amazing violence that I found
myſelf ſtunned, and in a hole nine
fathoms deep at leaſt, made by the
weight of my body falling from ſo
great a heigth; I recovered but knew
not how to get out again. However, I
dug ſlopes, or ſteps with my nails, (the
Barons nails were then of forty years
growth) and eaſily accompliſhed it.
Peace was ſoon after concluded
with: the Turks, and gaining
my liberty, left St. Peterſburgh,
at the time of that ſingular revolu-
tion
E 3
( 46 )
tion when the emperor in his cradle,
his mother, the duke of Brunſwick,
her father, field marſhal Munich, and
many others were ſent to Siberia.
The winter was then ſo uncommon-
ly ſevere all over Europe, that ever
ſince the ſun ſeems to be froſt-bitten.
At
my return to this place, I felt on
the road greater inconveniences than
thoſe I had experienced on my ſetting
out.
I travelint poſt, and finding myſelf
in a narrow lane, bid the poftillion
give a fignal with his horn, that
other travellers might not meet us
in the narrow paſſage. He blew
with all his might, but his en-
deavours were in vain. He could
not
Page 47
: ૬
A
1m
Publijnal according to Act of Parliament.Jlav 26,1786,
by GKearpley, Fleet Street, London,
( 47 )
not make the horn ſpeak, which,
was unaccountable and rather unfor-
tunate, for foon after we found our-
ſelves in the preſence of another
coach coming the other way,
there
was no proceeding; however, I got
out of my carriage, and being pretty
ſtrong, placed it, wheels and all up-
on my head, I then jumped (over a
hedge about nine feet high, which,
conſidering the weight of the coach,
was rather difficult) into a field, and
came out again, by another jump
into the road beyond the other car-
riage : I then went back for the
horſes, and placing one upon my
head and the other under my left
arm, I by the ſame means, that is,
jumping
( 48 )
jumping over the hedge
the hedge twice,
brought them to my coach, put too,
and proceeded to an Inn at the end
of our ſtage. I ſhould have told you
that the horſe under my arm was
very ſpirited, and not above four
years old; in making my ſecond
ſpring over the hedge, he expreſſed
great diſlike to that violent kind
of motion, by kicking and ſnort-
ing, however, I confined his hind
legs, by putting them into my coat-
pocket. After we arrived at the Inn
my poſtiliion and I refreſhed ourſelves,
he hung his horn on a peg near the
kitchen fue. I ſat down on the
other ſide.
Suddenly
( 49 )
us for
Suddenly we heard a Tereng ! tereng,
teng, teng! We looked round, and now
found the reaſon why the poſtillion
had not been able to found his horn.
His tunes were frozen up in the
horn, and come out now by thaw-
ing, plain enough, and much to
the credit of the driver, ſo that the
honeſt fellow entertained
ſome time with a variety of tunes
without putting his mouth to the
horn. The king of Pruſſia's march
Over the hill and over the dale
An evening hymn, and many other
favourite tanes came out and the
thawing entertainment concluded,
as I ſhall this ſhort account of
my
Ruflian travels.
Some
( 50')
Some travellers are apt to ad
vance more than is perhaps ſtrictly
true, if any of the company entertain
a doubt of my veracity, I ſhall only
ſay
to ſuch unbelievers, I pity their want
of faith, and muſt requeſt, they will
take their leave before I begint the
ſecond part of my adventures, wbicb
are as frictly founded in fa£t as thofe
I have already related.
THE
THE SECOND PART
OF
BARON MUNCHAUSEN's
A D V E N T v R'E S.
N the Year 1766, I embarked at
Portſmouth, in a firſt rate Eng-
liſh man of war, of one hundred
guns and fourteen hundred men,
for North America ; nothing worth
relating happened till we arrived
within three hundred leagues of the
river St. Laurence, when the thip
ſtruck.
( 52 )
ſtruck with amazing force againſt (as
we ſuppoſed) a rock; however, upon
heaving the lead we could find no
bottom, even with three * hundred
fathom. What made this circum-
ſtance the more wonderful, and in-
deed beyond all comprehenſion, was
that the violence of the ſhock was
fuch that we loſt our rudder, broke
our bowſprit in the middle, and ſplit
all our maſts from top to bottom,
two of which went by the board; a
poor fellow, who was aloft furling the
main (ſheet, was Aung at leaſt three
* We apprehend this muſt be a miſtake as 150
fathom is as great a depth as can be plummed:
leagues
( 53 )
i
leagues from the ſhip before he fell
into the ſea, but he fortunately ſaved
his life by laying hold of the tail of
a large ſea-gull then flying in the
air, which eaſed his fall into the
water, and afterwards ſwam with
him on his back, or rather betiveen
his neck and his wings, till he was
taken on board again : another
proof of the violence of the ſhock
was the force with which the people
between decks were driven againſt
the floors above them, my head par-
ticularly was preſſed into my ſtomach
where it continued ſome months be-
fore it recovered it's natural ſituation.
Whilſt we were all in a ſtate of aſto-
niſhment at the general and unac-
countableconfuſion in which we were
F
involved,
( 54 )
involved, the whole was ſuddenly
explained by the appearance of
of a
large whale, who had been baſking
alleep within fixteen feet of the ſur-
face of the water. This animal was
ſo much diſpleaſed with the diſturb-
ance which our ſhip had given him,
that he beat in all the gallery and part
of the quarter-deck with his tail, and
almoſt at the ſame inſtant took the
main ſheet anchor, which was ſuf-
pended, as it uſually is, from the
head, between his teeth, and ran
away with the ſhip at leaſt fixty
leagues, at the rate of twelve leagues
an hour, when fortunately the cable
broke, and we loſt both the whale
and the anchor ; however, upon our
return to Europe ſome months after,
we
( 55 )
we found the fame whale within a
few leagues of the ſame ſpot floating
dead upon the water ; it meaſurer
above half a mile in length. As we
could take but a ſmall quantity of
fuch a monſtrous animal on board,
we got our boats out, and with much
difficulty cut off its head, where to
our great joy we found the anchor,
and above forty fathom of the cable
concealed on the left ſide of his
mouth, juſt under his tongue. * This
was the only extraordinary circum-
ſtance that happened on this voyage.
One part of our diſtreſs I had like to
have forgot, while the whale was run-
* Pernaps this was the cauſe of his death, as-
thar fidc of his mouth.was much ſwelled..
ning.
( 56 )
ning away with the ſhip, the ſprung a
leak, and the water poured in fo faſt
that our pumps could not have kept
us from ſinking; it was my good for-
tune to diſcover it firſt; it was a large
hole about a foot diameter, I ſaved
this noble veſſel by a moſt. fortunate
thought! In ſhort I compleatly fill-
ed it with my
without
my
y ſmall cloaths, and
could have diſpenſed with it had it
been larger ; nor will you be ſurpriſed
when I inform you I am deſcended
from Dutch * parents.
taking off
The Baron's anceſtors have but lately ſettled
there; in anuther part of his adventures, he boafts
of loyal Blocd, See page 85.
My
( 57 )
My fituation while I ſat there was
rather cool, but the carpenter's art
foon relieved me.
I was once in great danger of
being loſt in a moft ſingular manner
in the Mediterranean; as I was ba-
thing in that pleaſant fea, near
Marſeilles, one ſummer's afternoon
when I diſcovered a very large fiſh,
with his jaws quite extended, ap-
proaching me with the greateſt ve-
locity; there was no time to be loft,
nor could I poſſibly avoid him. I
immediately reduced myſelf to as
ſmall a fize as poſſible, by clofing my
feet, and placing my hands alſo near
my fides, in which poſition I paſſed
directly between his jaws, and into
his
F 3
( 58 )
his. ftomach ; where I remained fome
time in total darkneſs, and comfort-
ably warm, as you may imagine; at
laſt it occured to me, that by giving
him pain, he would be glad to get
rid of me : as I had plenty of room
I played many pranks, ſuch as tumb-
ling, hop, ſtep, and jump,&c. but no-
thing ſeemed to diſturb him ſo much
as the quick motion of my feet in at-
tempting to dance a hornpipe : he
roared horridly, and ſtood up, al-
moſt perpendicular in the water,
with half his body expoſed, by which
he was diſcovered by the people on
board an Italian trader then ſailingby,
who harpooned him in a few minutes;
as ſoon as he was brought on board,
I heard
}
Page 59
Publijhad according to Act of Parliament. Mav 26,1786.67 Kearner.Fleet Street, London.
( 59 )
I heard the crew conſulting how they
ſhould cut him up, ſo as to preſerve
the greateſt quantity of oil; as I un-
derſtood Italian, I was in moſt
dreadful apprehenſions, leſt their
weapons employed in this buſineſs
fhould deſtroy me alſo; therefore
I ſtood as near the centre as pof-
fible, for there was room enough for
a dozen men in this creature's ſtomach,
and I naturally imagined they would
begin with the extremeties : how-
ever, my fears were ſoon diſperſed;
for they began by opening the
bottom of the belly. As ſoon as I
preceived a glimmering of light, I
called out luftily to be releaſed from
a ſituation in which I was now al.
moſt
( 60
moſt ſtifled. It is impoffible for me
to do juſtice to the degree and kind of
aftoniſhment which fat upon every
countenance at hearing a human
voice iſſue from a fiſh, but more fo
at feeing a naked man walk upright
out of his body ; in thort, gentlemen,
I told them the whole ftory, as I have
done you, whilſt amazement ſtruck
them dumb.
After taking ſome refreſhment,
and jumping into the ſea to cleanſe
myſelf Ffwam to my cloaths, which
lay, where I had left them, on
the ſhore. As near as I can caleu-
late, I was near four hours and a
half confined in the ſtomach of this
animal.
When
(61
)
When I was in the fervice of the
Turks, I frequently amuſed myſelf
in a pleaſure barge on the Marmo-
ra, which commands a view of
the whole city of Conſtantinople,
including the Grand Seignior's fe-
raglio. One morning, as I was
admiring the beauty and ſerenity of
the ſky, I obſerved a globular fub-
ftance in the air, which appeared to
be about the ſize of a twelve-inch
globe, with fomething ſuſpended
from it. I immediately took up
my largeſt and longeſt barrel
fowling-piece, which I never travel
or make even an excurſion without
if I can help it; I charged it with
ball, and fired it at the globe, but
to
( 62 )
to no parpofe ; the object was at toe
great a diſtance ; I then put in a
double quantity of powder, and five
or fix balls, this fecond attempt
fucceeded, all the balls took effect,
and tore one ſide open and brought
it down. Judge my ſurprize when
& moft elegant gilt car, with a
man in it, and past of a theep.
which ſeemed
to have
been
roaſted, fell within two yards of
when my aftaniſhment had.
in ſome degree fubfided, I ordered
my people to row cloſe to this
ſtrange aerial traveller.
.
I took him on board my barge, (he
was a native of France) he was much
indit-
( 63 )
indiſpoſed from his ſudden fall into
the ſea, and incapable of ſpeaking;
after ſome time, however he recover-
ed, and
gave the following account
of himſelf, viz. " About ſeven or
eight days fince, I cannot tell
which, for I have loſt my reck-
oning, having been moſt of the
“ time where the ſun never fets, f
46 aſcended from the land's end in
** Cornwall in the iſland of GREAT
“ BRITAIN, in the car from which I
“ have been juſt taken ſuſpended
* from a very large balloon, and
“ took a ſheep with me to try at-
moſpheric experiments upon; on-
" fortunately, the wind changed
“ within ten minutes after my 'al-
cent, and inſtead of driving to.
wards
( 64 )
“ wards Exeter, where I intended to
land, I was driven towards the ſea,
“over which I ſuppoſe I have con-
“ tinued ever ſince, but much too
high to make obſervations.
“ The calls of hunger were fo
preſſing, that the intended experi-
“ ments upon heat and reſpiration,
gave way to them. I was obliged
“ on the third day to kill the ſheep
“ for food, and being at that
« time infinitely above the moon,
“ and for upwards of fixteen hours
" after, ſo very near the ſun that
" jt ſcorched my eye. brows, I
placed the carcaſe, taking care
“ to ſkin it firſt, in that
part
of the
“ car where the ſun had ſufficient
power
( 65 )
power, or, in other words, where
<< the balloon did not fhade it from
“ the ſun, by which method it'was
"s well roaſted in about two hours :
“
<s. this has been my food ever fince.”
Here he pauſed, and ſeemed loft
in viewing the objects about him.
When I told him the buildings juſt
before us were the Grand Seignior's
ſeraglio 'at Conftantinople, he ſeemed
exceedingly affected, as he had ſup-
poſed himſelf in a very different
ſituation, « The cauſe, added he,
" of my long flight was owing to the
“ failure of a ſtring which was fixed
« to a valve in the balloon intended
" to let out the inflammable air, and
« if it had not been fired at, and rent
G
ri ini
( 66 )
The car
6 in the manner before mentioned, he
might, like Mahomet, have been
ſuſpended between heaven and
“ earth till doomſday."
he generouſly gave to my barge-
maſter who was in the ſteerage; the
mutton he chrew into the fea; as to
the balloon, it was 'rent to pieces in
its rapid fall, in conſequence of the
damage I had done it.
I will relate a very ſtrange cir-
cumſtance that happened to me a
few months before my laſt return
to Europe,
The-
( 67 )
The Grand Seignior, to whom
was introduced by the Imperial,
Ruſſian, and French Ambaſſadors,
employed me to negociate a matter
of great importance at Grand Cairo,
and which was of ſuch a nature, that
it muſt ever remain a ſecret.
I went there in great ſtate by land,
where having compleated the buſi-
neſs, diſmiſſed almoſt all my attend-
ants, and returned like a private gen-
tleman; the weather was delightful,
and that famous river the Nile was
beautiful beyond all deſcription; in
ſhort, I was tempted to hire a barge,
to deſcend by water to Alexandria.
On the third day of my voyage
the
G2
( 68 )
the river began to riſe moſt amazingly
(you have all heard, I preſume of the
annual overflowing of the Nile), and
on the next day it ſpread the whole
country for many leagues on each
fide! On the fifth, at ſun-riſe, my
barge became entangled with what
I at firſt took for ſhrubs, but as the
light became ſtronger, I found my-
ſelf ſurrounded by almonds, which
were perfectly ripe, and in the
higheſt perfection ; upon plumbing
with a line my people found we were
at leaſt fixty feet from the ground,
and unable to advance or retreat ;.
about eight or nine o'clock, as neari
as I could judge by the altitude of
the ſun, the wind roſe ſuddenly, and
canted
Page 68
12
SUB!
MG
ng
Publiſhed according to let of Parliament,
Mor 26,1786,
br ch'earjler. Fleet Street, London.
:
( 69 )
canted our barge on one ſide; here
ſhe filled, and I ſaw no more of her
for ſome time, as you will hear; for-
tunately we all ſaved ourſelves (fix
men and two boys) by clinging to
the trees, the boughs of which were
equal to our weight, though not to
that of the barge: in this ſituation
we continued fix weeks and three
days, living upon the almonds! I
need not inform you we had plenty
of water. On the forty-ſecond
day of our diſtreſs the water fell as
rapidly as it had riſen, and on the
forty-ſixth we were able to venture
down upon terra firma. Our barge
was the firſt pleaſing object we ſaw,
about two hundred yards from the
ſpot
G 3
( 70 )
ſpot where the funk. After drying
every thing that was uſeful by the
heat of the ſun, and loading ourſelves
with neceſſaries from the ſtores on
board, we ſet out to recover our loſt
ground, and found by the neareſt
calculation we had been carried over
garden walls, and variety of inclo-
ſures, above 150 miles. In ſeven
days we reached the river, which was
now confined to its banks, related
our adventures to a Bey, who kindly
accommodated all our wants, and
fent us forward in a barge of his
own. In fix days more we arrived at
Alexandria, where we took ſhipping
for Conſtantinople. I was received
kindly by the Grand Seignior, had
the
( 71 )
the honour of ſeeing the ſeraglio, to
which his highneſs introduced me
himſelf, and preſented me with as
many ladies, his wives not excepted,
as I thought proper to ſelect for my
own amuſement, and half a dozen
friends alſo.
During the late siege of GIBRAL-
TAR I went with a proviſion fleet
under LORD RODNEY's command to
fee
my
old friend GENERAL ELIOTT,
who has, by his diſtinguiſhed defence
of that place, acquired laurels that
can never fade. After the uſual joy
which generally attends the meeting
of old friends had fubfided, I went
to examine the ſtate of the garriſon,
and
( 72 )
and view the operations of the ene-
my, for which purpoſe the General
accompanied me.
I had brought a
moſt excellent refracting teleſcope
with me from London, purchaſed of
Donaldſon, by the help of which I
found the enemy were going to diſ-
charge a thirty-fix pounder at the
ſpot where we ſtood : I told the Ge-
neral what they were about; he
looked through the glaſs alſo, and
found my conjectures right. I im-
mediately, by his permiſſion, ordered
a forty-eight pounder to be brought
from a neighbouring battery, which
I placed with ſo much exactneſs
(having long ſtudied the art of
gun-
nery) that I was ſure of my mark.
I con-
[ 73 )
I continued watching the enemy till
I ſaw the match placed at the touch-
hole of their piece; at that very in-
ftant I gave the ſignal for our gun to
be fired alſo. About midway between
the two pieces of cannon, the balls
Atruck each other with amazing force,
and the effect was aſtoniſhing! The
enemy's ball recoiled back with ſuch
violence as to kill the man who had
diſcharged it, by carrying his head fairly
off, with fixteen others which it met
with, in it's progreſs to the BARBARY
Coast, where it's force, after paſſing
through three maſts of veſſels that then
lay in a line behind each other in the
harbour, was ſo much ſpent that it only
broke it's way through the roof of a
poor
[ 74 ]
poor labourer's hut, about two hundred
yards inland, and deſtroyed the few
teeth an old woman had left, who lay
aſleep upon her back with her mouthi
open; the ball lodged in her throat:
dier huſband ſoon after came home, and
endeavoured to extract it, but finding
that impracticable, by the aſſiſtance
of a ranımer, he forced it into her fto-
mach, from whence it was diſcharged
downwards in a natural way. Our bail
did excellent ſervice, for it not only
repelled the other in the manner juſt
deſcribed, but proceeding as I intend-
ed it ſhould, it diſmounted the very
piece of cannon that had been juſt
employed again!t us, and forced it
inio the hold of the ship, where it fell
with
( 75 )
with ſo much force as to break it's
way through the bottom. The ſhip
immediately filled and funk, with
above a thouſand Spaniſh ſailors on
board, beſides a conſiderable number
of ſoldiers. This, to be ſure, was a
moſt extraordinary exploit : I will
not, however, take the whole merit
to myſelf; my judgment was the
principal engine, but chance aſſiſted
me a little ; for I afterwards found,
that the man who charged our forty-
eighit pounder put:in, by miſtake, a
double quantity of powder, elſe we
could never have ſucceeded ſo much
beyond all expectation, eſpecially in
repelling the enemy's ball.
General
( 76 )
General Eliott would have given
me a.commiſſion for this ſingular
piece of ſervice, but I declined every
thing, except his thanks, which I re-
ceived at a crowded table of officers
ſupper on the evening of that very
day.
As I am very partial to the Engliſh,
who are beyond all doubt a brave
people, I determined not to take
my
leave of the garriſon till I had ren-
dered them another piece of ſervice;
and in about three weeks an oppor-
tunity preſented itſelf: I dreſſed my-
felf in the habit of a Popiſh Prieſt,
and about one o'clock in the morning
ſtole out of the garriſon, paſſed the
enemy's
( 77 )
enemy's lines, and arrived in the
middle of their camp, where I en-
tered the tent in which the Prince
D'Artois was, with the commander
in chief, and ſeveral other officers,
in deep council, concerting a plan to
ſtorm the garriſon next morning;
my diſguiſe was my protection, they
ſuffered me to continue there, hear-
ing every thing that paſſed, till they
went to their ſeveral beds; when I
found the whole camp, and even
the centinels, were wrapped up in
the arms of Morpheus, I began my
work, which was that of diſmount-
ing all their cannon (above three
hundred pieces) from forty-eight to
twenty-four pounders, and throwing
H
them
(178)
them three leagues into the ſea.
Having.no affiſtance, I found this the
hardeſt taſk I ever undertook, except
fwimming to the oppoſite ſhore with
the famous Turkiſh piece of orda
nance, deſcribed by Baron Tort in
his memoirs, which I ſhall hereafter
mention. I then piled all the car-
riages together in the centre of the
camp, which, to prevent the noiſe of
the wheels being heard, I carried in
pairs under my arms; and a noble
appearance they made, as high at leaſt
as the rock of Gibraltar. I then
lighted a match, by ſtriking a fint
ſtone, situated twenty feet from the
ground, (in an old wall, built by the
Moors when they invaded Spain),
with
( 79 )
with the britch of an eight and forty
iron pounder, and ſo ſet fire to the
whole pile. I forgot to inform you
that I threw all their ammunition
waggons upon
the
top.
Before I applied the lighted match
I had laid the combuſtibles at
the bottom ſo judiciouſly that the
whole was in a blaze in a moment.
To prevent ſuſpicion, I was one
of the firſt to expreſs my fur-
prize. The whole camp was, as
you may imagine, petrified with
aſtoniſhment; the general conclu-
fion was, that their centinels had been
bribed, and that ſeven or eight regi-
ments of the garriſon had been em-
ployed
H2
( 80 )
ployed in this horrid deſtruction of
their artillery. Mr. Drinkwater, in
his account of this famous fjege,
mentions the enemy ſuſtaining a
great loſs by a fire which happened in
their camp, but never knew the cauſe:
how ſhould he? as I never divulged
it before (though I alone ſaved Gib-
raltar by this night's buſineſs) not
even to General Eliott. The count
D' Artois and all his attendants ran
away in their fright, and never
ſtopped on the road till they reached
Paris, which they did in about a
fortnight ; this dreadful conflagration
had ſuch an effe&t upon them, that
they. were incapable of taking the
leaſt refreſhment for three months
after,
( 81 )
after, but, cameleon like, lived upon:
the air. If any gentleman in com-
pany will ſay he doubts the truth of
this ſtory, I will fine him a gallon
of brandy, and make him drink it at
one draught, and ſwallow the bottle
or bowl he drinks it out of likewiſe.
About two months after I had done
the beſieged this ſervice, one morn-
ing as I ſat at breakfaſt with Gene-
ral Eliott, a ſhell (for I had not time
to deſtroy their mortars as well as their
cannon) entered the apartment we
were ſitting in ; it lodged upon our
table; the general, as moſt men would
do, quitted the room directly, but I
took it up before it burſt, and carried
H 3
it
( 82 )
it to the top of the rock, when look-
ing overq the enemy's camp on an
eminence near the ſea-coaſt, I ob-
ferved a conſiderable number of peo-
ple, but could not, with
my naked
eye, diſcover how they were em-
ployed. I had recourſe again to my
teleſcope, when I found that two of
our officers, one a general, the other
a colonel, with whom I had ſpent the
preceding evening, and who went out
into the enemy's camp about mid-
night as ſpies, were taken, and then
were actually going to be executed
on a gibbet. I found the diſtance
too great to throw the ſhell with
my
hand, but moſt fortunately recollect-
ing that I had the very lling in my
pocket
( 83 )
pocket which affifted David in Nay-
ing Goliah, I placed the ſhell in it,
and immediately threw it in the midſt
of them; it burſt as it fell, and de-
ſtroyed all preſent, except the two
culprits, who were ſaved by being
luſpended ſo high, for they were juſt
turned off: however, one of the pieces
of the ſhell flew with ſuch force
againſt the foot of the gibbet, that it
immediately brought it down. Our
two friends no ſooner felt terra firma
than they looked about for the cauſe,
and finding their guards, executioner
and all, had taken it in their heads
to die firſt, they directly extricated
each other from their diſgracefulcords,
and then ran down to the fea fhore,
ſeized
( 84 )
ſeized a Spaniſh boat with two men
in it, and made them row to one of
our ſhips, which they did with great
ſafety, and in a few minutes after,
when I was relating to General Eliott
how I had acted, they both took us
by the hand, and after mutual congra-
tulations, we retired to ſpend the day
with feſtivity.
.
Some ſhells, after they are dif-
charged from the mortars, burft al-
moft as ſoon as they arrive at the
place they are intended for ; others
are a conſiderable time before they
fly to pieces, and ſpread deftruction
round. Of this latter fort, fortunately,
was the ſhell with which I deſtroyed
fo
( 85 )
ſo many of the enemy, and ſaved the
lives of my friends.
As to the SLING, I have bequeath-
ed it as a relick of ineſtimable value,
to be hung up in Liberty-Hall,
and hereafter uſed, as often as neceſ.
fary, in the deſtruction of all Ty-
RANTS, and thoſe who are baſe
enough to act under them.
!
You wiſh (I can ſee by your coun-
tenances), I would inform you how I
became poſſeſſed of ſuch a treaſure.
Thus then it was: I am a deſcendant
of the wife of Uriah, whom we all
know David was intimate with
the had ſeveral children by his
majeſty;
;
( 86 )
majeſty; they quarrelled once upon
a matter of the firſt conſequence, viz.
the ſpot where Noah's ark was built,
and where it refted after the flood !
A ſeparation conſequently enſued. She
had often heard him ſpeak of this
fling as his moſt valuable treaſure :
this the ſtole the night they parted ;
it was miffed before ſhe got out of
his dominions, and ſhe was purſued
by no leſs than ſix of the king's body
guards : however, by uſing it herſelf,
ſhe hit the firſt of them (for one was
more active in the purſuit than the
reſt) where David did Goliah, and
killed him on the ſpot: his companions
were ſo alarmed at his fall that they
retired, and left Uriah's wife to pur-
ſue
( ( 87 )
fue her journey; ſhe took with her,
I ſhould have informed you before,
her favourite ſon by this connection,
to whom ſhe bequeathed the ſling;
and thus it has, without interruption,
deſcended from father to ſon till it
came into my poffeffion. One of its
poffeffors, my great great great grand-
father, who lived about two hundred
and fifty years ago, was upon a viſit
in England, and became intimate
with a poet, who was a great deer-
ftealer; I think his name was Shake-
fpear: he frequently borrowed this
fling, and killed ſo much of the king's
veniſon, that he narrowly eſcaped the
fate of my two friends at Gibraltar.
Poor Shakeſpear was impriſoned, and
my
( 88 )
my anceſtor obtained his freedom in
a very ſingular manner. Queen Eli-
zabeth was then on the throne, but
grown ſo indolent, that every trifling
matter was become a trouble to her;
dreſſing, undreſſing, eating, drinking,
and ſome other offices, which ſhall be
nameleſs, made life a burthen to her:
all thefe things he enabled her to do
without! and what do you
think
was the only return the could pre-
vail upon him to accept for ſuch
eminent ſervices ? ſetting Shakeſpear
at liberty. Such was his friendſhip
for chat famous writer, that he would
have ſhortened his own days to add
to the number of his.
I do
( 89 )
I do not hear that any of the queen's
ſubjects, particularly the beef-eaters,
however they might be ſtruck with
it at the time, much approved of her
living totally without food, for the
did not ſurvive the practice herſelf
above three years and a half.
If any extraordinary feats have
been done by the different pofſefſors
of this ſling ſince the above period, I
am ignorant of them.
My father, who was the immediate
poffeffor before me, told me the fol-
lowing anecdote, viz, he dreamt one
morning, about an hour before he
roſe, that he was walking by the
I
ſea.
(90)
fea-fhore at Harwich, and dropping
this ſling into the ſea, it immedi-
ately roſe up in the graceful form
of Thetis, daughter of Neptune;
who took him in her arms, and
gave him full poſſeſſion of her per-
ſon. The dream was ſo remarkable
that he got up as ſoon as he awoke,
put this fling in his pocket, and
walked by the ſea ſide : before his
paces had covered a mile, he was
attacked by a fierce animal called
a ſeahorſe, open mouthed, who ran
at him with great fury; he heſitated
a moment, then took out his fling,
retreated back about five hundred
yards, ſtooped for a couple of peb-
bles, of which there were plenty
under
( )
9 91
under his feet, and ſung them both
fo dextrouſly at the animal that
each put out an eye, and lodged in
the cavities which their removal
had occaſioned. My father now
ſtept on one ſide, got upon his back,
and drove him into the ſea ; the
fling was placed as a bridle in his
mouth, and having no fight, he was
guided with the greateſt facility.
acroſs the ocean, and in leſs than
three hours they both arrived on
the oppoſite ſhore, about thirty
leagues on the coaſt of Holland.
The maſter of the Three Cups, at
Helvoetſluys, purchaſed this marine
horſe to make an exhibition of, for ſeven
hundred ducats, which was upwards
of
I 2
( 92 )
of three hundred pounds, and the
next day my father paid his paſſage
back in the packet to Harwich.
Before I conclude, I muſt inform
you that this fling poffefſes a moſt
aſtoniſhing virtue, i. e. as nothing
can be related of it which it is not
capable of performing, every perſon
conceives himſelf bound to give full
credit to what he hears.
THE
( 93 )
THE FROLIC.
This famous fling, which I have
ſo often mentioned to you, like
Fortunatus's wiſhing-cap, not only
puts you in poſſeſſion of what you
wiſh for, but makes you equal to any
taſk you are deſirous of performing.
I made a balloon of ſuch exten-
five dimenſions, that an account of
the filk it contained would exceed all
credibility, every mercer's ſhop and
weaver's ſtock in London, Weſt-
minſter, and Spittle-Fields, contri-
buted to it; with this and my fling
I played many tricks, ſuch as taking
one houſe from it's ſtation and placing
I 3
another
( 94 )
another in it's ſtead, without diſturb-
ing the inhabitants, who were gene-
rally aſleep, or too much employed
to obſerve the peregrinations of their
habitations,
On the zoth of September, when the
college of phyſicianschuſetheir annual
officers, and dine ſumptuouſly toge-
ther, I filled my balloon, brought it over
the dome of their building, clapped
the fling round the golden ball at the
top, faſtning the other end of it to
the balloon, and immediately aſcend-
ed with the whole college to an im-
menſe height, where I kept them
upwards of three months: you will
naturally enquire what they did for
food
Page 120 to 127
Harwich
Halvor
kom
W
mot
3
These
Pullijheid w the Art director, no 10** 1796 67 61. K'earyle, Fleet Street, London
College of
Publijhed
azt N40, Fleet Street, Londore.
as the Act director hy 6. Kearly,
BI
Physicians
Elen
..
*WW
Page 129.
will
Calmas
Dover
TTTT
2
W
Fighting
2
the ci rrets. by 6. keayii in: .
tantsiset" wit
cre i redora
( 95 )
food ſuch a length of time to this
I anſwer, had I kept them ſuſpended
twice the time they would have ex-
perienced no want on that account,
ſo amply or rather extravagantly had
they ſpread their table for that day's
feaſting.
Though this was meant as an inno-
cent frolic, it was productive of much
miſchief to ſeveral reſpectable cha-
racters, eſpecially amongſt the Clergy,
Undertakers, Sextons, and Grave-
diggers, they were, it muſt be ac-
knowledged, ſufferers, for it's a
well-known fact, that during the
three months the college was ſuf-
pended in the air, and therefore in-
capable of attending their patients,
there
( 96 )
there were no deaths happened, ex-
cept a few who fell before the ſcythe
of Father Time, and ſome obſcure
melancholy objects who, perhaps
to avoid ſome trifling inconvenience
here, laid the hands of violence
upon
themſelves, and plunged into eternity
without a moment's confideration !
If the Apothecaries had not
been very active during the above
time, half the Undertakers in all pro-
bability would have been bankrupts.
A TRIP TO THE NORTH.
There is not, I am perſuaded, a
gentleman in company who does not
remember Lord Mulgrave (then Cap-
tain Phipps's) laſt voyage of diſcovery
to
( 97 )
to the North. I accompanied the
captain, not as an officer but a private
friend. When we arrived in a high
northern latitude, I was viewing the
objects around me with the teleſcope,
which I introduced to your notice in
my Gibralter adventures. I thought
I ſaw two large white bears in violent
action upon a body of ice, conſidera-
bly above the maſts, and about half
a league diſtance: I immediately
took my carbine, ſlung it acroſs my
ſhoulder, and aſcended the ice;
when I arrived at the top the un-
evenneſs of the ſurface made my ap-
proach to thoſe animals troubleſome
and hazardous beyond expreſſion ;
ſometimes hideous cavities oppoſed
me,
(98)
me, which I was obliged to ſpring
over ; in other parts the ſurface was
as ſmooth as a mirror, and I was
continually falling; as I approached
near enough to reach them, I found
they were only at play. I immedi-
ately began to calculate the value of
their ſkins, for they were each as
large as a well fed ox; unfortunately
at the very inſtant I was preſenting
my carbine, my right foot flipt, I
fell upon my back, and the violence
of the blow deprived me totally of
my ſenſes for near half an hour;
however, when I recovered, judge of
my ſurprize at finding one of thoſe
large animals I have been juſt de-
fcribing, had turned me upon my
face,
( 99 )
face, and was juſt laying hold of the
waiſtband of my breeches, which
were then new and made of leather ;
he was certainly going to carry me
feet foremoſt, God knows where,
when I took this knife (ſhewing a
large claſp knife) out of my ſide
pocket, made a chop at one of his
hind feet, and cut off three of his
toes; he immediately let me drop, and
roared moſt horridly; I took up my
carbine and fired at him as he ran off,
he fell directly; the noiſe of the
piece rouſed ſeveral thouſands of
thefe white bears, who were aſleep
upon
the ice within half a mile of me;
they came immediately to the ſpot,
there was no.time to be lost; a mast.
fortunate
( 100 )
fortunate thought arrived in my peri-
cranium juſt at that inſtant. I took
off the ſkin and head of the dead bear
in half the time that ſome people
would be in ſkinning a rabbit, and
wrapped myſelf in it, placing my
own head directly under bruins;
the whole herd came round me im-
mediately, and my apprehenſions
threw me in a moſt piteous ſituation
to, be ſure: however, my ſcheme
turned out a moſt admirable one,
for my own ſafety. They all came
ſmelling, and evidently took me
for a brother bruin ; I wanted no-
thing but bulk to make an ex-
cellent counterfeit : however, I ſaw
ſeveral cubs amongſt them not much
larger
(
IÓl)
larger than myſelf. After they had
all (melt me, and the body of their
deceaſed companion, whoſe ſkin was
now become my protector, we ſeemed
very ſociable, and I found I could
mimic all their actions tolerably well,
but at growling, roaring, or hugging
they were quite my maſters. I be-
gan now to think how I might tura
the general confidence which I had
ereated amongſt theſe animals to my
advantage.
I had heard an old army ſurgeon
fay, a wound in the ſpine. was in
ftant death. I now determined to
try the experiment, and had again
recourſe to my knife, with which !
K.
ſtuck
{ (röź )
fuck the largeſt in the back of the
neck, near the ſhoulders, and I did
this under great apprehenſions, not
doubting but the creature would, if
he ſurvived the ftab, tear me to
pieces. However, in this I was re-
markably fortunate; for he fell dead
at my feet, without making the leaſt
noiſe. I was now reſolved to demo-
lith ihem every one in the ſame
manner, which I accompliſhed with-
out the leaſt difficulty ; for though
they ſaw their companions fall, they
had no ſuſpicion of either the cauſe
or the effect. When they all lay
dead before me, I felt myſelf a fe-
cond Sampſon, having flain my
thouſands.
То
( 103 )
To make ſhort of the ſtory, I went
back to the ſhip, and borrowed three
parts of the crew, to aſſiſt me in
ſkinning them, and carrying the hams
on board, which we did in a few
hours, and loaded the Chip with
them. As to the other parts of the
animals, they were thrown into the
ſea, though I doubt not but the
whole would eat as well as the legs,
were they properly cured.
As ſoon as we returned I ſent ſome
of the hams, in the Captain's
name, to the Lords of the Admiralty ;
others to the Lords of the Treaſury;
fome to the Lord-Mayor and Corpo-
ration of London ; a few to each of
the
K 2
}
( 104 )
the trading Companies; and the re-
mainder to my particular friends,
from all of whom I received warm
thanks, but from the City I was ho-
noured with ſubſtantial notice, viz. an
invitation to dine at Guildhall annu-
ally on Lord-Mayor's-Day.
The bear fkins I ſent to the
E-ſs of R-a, to clothe her my
and her court in the winter, for
which ſhe wrote me a letter of thanks.
with her own hand, and fent it by an
ambaſſador extraordinary, inviting me
to ſhare the honours of her bed and
crown ; but, as I never was ambiti-
ous of royal dignity, I declined her
m-g's favour in the politeſt terms.
The
( 105 )
The ſame ambaſſador had orders to
wait, and bring my anſwer to her
mấy perſonally, upon which buſi-
neſs he was abſent about three
months ; her mmy's reply. con-
vinced me of the ſtrength of her af-
fection, and the dignity of her mind;
her late indiſpoſition was entirely
owing (as ſhe, kind creature! was
pleaſed to expreſs herſelf in a late
converſation with the Prince Dolga-
toucki) to my cruelty : what the ſex
ſee in me I cannot conceive, but the
E-ſs is not the only female fove-
reign who has offered me her hand.
Some people have very illiberally
reported, that Captain P-ps did
K3
not
( 106 )
not proceed as far as he might have
done
upon
that expedition. Here it
becomes my duty to acquit him; our
Thip was in very proper trim, till I
loaded it with ſuch an immenſe quan-
tity cf bear ſkins and hams, after
which it would have been madneſs
to have attempted to proceed further,
as we were now ſcarcely able to com-
bat à briſk gale, much leſs thoſe
mountains of ice which lay in the
higher latitudes.
The Captain has fince often
expreffed a diffatisfaction that he had
no ſhare in the honours of that day,
which he emphatically called the
bear ſkin day. He has alſo been very
de Grous
( 107 )
deſirous of knowing by what art I
deſtroyed ſo many thouſands without
fatigue or danger to myſelf; indeed
he is ſo ambitious of dividing the
glory with me, that we have actually
quarrelled about it, and we are not
now upon ſpeaking terms. He boldly
afferts I had no merit in deceiving
the bears, becauſe I was covered with
one of their ſkins; nay, he declares
there is not in his opinion in Europe
fo compleat a b-r naturally as him-
felf among the human ſpecies.
He is now a noble peer, and
I am too well acquainted with good
manners to difpute fo delicate a paint
with his lordſhip.
As
( 108 )
As ſoon as the Baron had rem
lated the laſt ſtory he retired, and
left the company much diverted and
in good ſpirits. After each man had
expreſſed himſelf as he thought pro-
per upon the extraordinary entertain-
ment he had given them, one of the
company, a near relation, who at-
tended him on his laſt journey to
Turkey, obſerved, that near Con-
ftantinople they have an amazing
piece of ordnance, of which Baron
Tott in his Memoirs, lately publiſhed,
takes particular notice. What he
ſays of it, as near as my memory will
ſerve me, is this : " The Turks bad
placed below the cáſle, and near the
city, on the banks of tbe Simois, a
« celebrated
( 109 )
«i celebrated river, an enormous piece
« of ordnance, caſt in braſs, which
« would carry a marble ball of ELEVEN
“ HUNDRED POUNDS weight. I was
inclined, ſays Tott, to fire it, but I
was willing firſt to judge of it's ef-
feet; the crowd about me trembled at
ự this propoſal, as they aſſerted it would
" overthrow not only the caſtle, but the
city alſo: at length their fears in
part ſubſided, and I was permitted to
diſcharge it. It requirnd not leffs
« than THREE HUNDRED AND THIR-
" TY POUNDS WEIGHT OF POWDER,
«. and the ball weigbed, as before men-
« tioned; ELEVEN HUNDRED WEIGHT.
• When the engineer brought the prim-
ing, the crowds- who were about me
« retreated
( HO)
« retreated back as faſt as they could';
“nay, it was with the utmoſt difficulty
“ I perſuaded the PACHA, who came
“ on purpoſe, there was no danger :
“ even the engineer, who was to diſ-
charge it by my direction, was con-
fiderably alarmed. I took my ſtand
" on ſome ſtone-work þebind the cannon,
gave the hignal, and felt a ſhock like
“ that of an EARTHQUAKE ! at the
“ diſtance of three bundred fathom,
“ the ball burſt into three pieces, the
fragments croſſed the Strait, re-
bounded on the oppoſite · mountain,
" and left the ſurface of the water all
“ in a foam, through tbe whole breadth
of the Channel.”.
This,
Page 47
2
Published attending to Act of
by & Kearly, F1
Page ti
+
(E.
it
M
އަޒާ
7
Publiſhed according to det of Parliament, 1/2 26,1780 Ør ci-Kiieriler , livet Shrut. London.
L
*****
ly
**Rentono ----
2
Hoteller
Page 52 & 53
III stop
Publijhed according to Act o;* Parliament, Vay 26,1786,
br Ghearſley, Fleet Street, London.
('un)
This, gentlemen, is, as near as I
can recollect, BARON Tott's account
of the largeſt cannon in the known
world. Now when Baron Mun-
chauſen and I were there not long
ſince, the anecdote of Tott's firing
this tremendous piece was mentioned
as a proof of that gentleman's extra-
ordinary courage.
My friend MUNCHAUSEN, who
was determined not to be-out-done
by a Frenchman, took this very piece
upon hisſhoulder, and, after balancing
it properly, jumped into the ſea with
it, and ſwam to the oppoſite ſhore,
from whence ke unfortunately at-
tempted to throw it back into it's for-
mer
( 112 )
mer place : I ſay unfortunately, for
it flipt a little in his hand, juſt as he
was going to diſcharge it, and in con-
ſequence of that, it fell into the middle
of the channel, where it now lies,
without a proſpect of ever recovering
it, and, notwithſtanding the high
favour he was in with the Grand
Seignior, as mentioned in his laſt
ſtory, this cruel Turk, as ſoon as he
heard of the loſs of his famous piece
of ordnance, iſſued an order to cut
off the Baron's head. He was im-
mediately informed of it by one of
the Sultanas, with whom he was be-
come a great favourite, and the
fecreted him in her apartment while
the officer charged with his execution
was,
( 113 )
was, with his aſſiſtants, in ſearch of
him.
That very night we both made our
eſcape on board a veffel bound to Ve-
nice, which was then weighing an-
chor to proceed on her voyage.
This ſtory, gentlemen, the Baron
is not fond of mentioning, as he mif-
carried in his attempt, and was very
near loſing his life into the bargain;
however, as it contains no impeach-
ment of his honour, I frequently re-
late it in his abſence.
Now, gentlemen, you all know
the Baron, and can have no doubt of
L
his
( 114 )
his veracity; leaſt any
of
you
ſhould
entertain any ſcruples about mine,
a circumſtance which I can ſcarcely
fuppoſe, I will let you know who I
am. I have already informed you
that I am related to the Baron.
My reputed father was a native of
Berne, in Switzerland, his profeſfion
was that of a ſurveyor of the ſtreets,
lanes, and alleys, vulgarly called a
fcavenger. My mother was a native
of the mountains of Savoy, and had
a moſt beautiful large wen on her
neck, common to both ſexes who
are natives of that part of the world;
the left her parents when young, and
fought
( 115 )
fought her fortune in the ſame city
which gave my father birth; The
maintained herſelf while ſingle by acts
of kindneſs to our ſex, far ſhe never
was known to refuſe them any favour
they aſked, provided they did but
pay her ſome compliment before
hand. This lovely couple met by
accident in the ſtreet, in conſequence
of their being both intoxicated, for
by reeling to one centre, they threw
each other down; they conſequently
were abuſive, and they were both
carried to the watch-houſe, and
afterwards to the houſe of corrections
they ſoon ſaw the folly of quarrel
ling, made it up, became fond of
each other and married : but my
L2
mother
( 116 )
mother returning to her old tricks,
my father, who had high notions of
honour, ſoon ſeparated himſelf from
her, and gave her a baſket as a ſet-
tlemeat ;- the then joined a family
who ſtrolled about with a puppet-
fhew. In time ſhe arrived at Rome,
where ſhe kept an oyſter ſtand. You
have all heard no doubt of Pope
GANGANELLI, commonly called
Clement XIV. he was remarkably
fond of oyſters ; one Good-Friday
as he was paſſing through the city
in ſtate, to afgift at high maſs' at St.
Peter's church, he ſaw
my
mother's
oyſters (which were remarkably fine
and freſh, as ſhe informed me) he
could not proceed without taſting
them;
Page 117
#!!
Publyphed urrunding der Porliamw- V1.nl
i pri poro vihen li 4. trad hindas
(189
them; there were above five thou-
ſand people in his train, he ordered
them all to ſtop, and fent word to
the church he could not attend maſs
till next day; then alighting from
his horſe (for the Pope always rides
on horſeback upon theſe occaſions)
he went into my mother's ſtall, and
eat every oyſter ſhe had there, and
afterwards retired into the cellar,
where ſhe had a few more. This
ſubterraneous apartment was my mo-
ther's kitchen, parlour, and bed-
chamber. He liked his ſituation ſo
much that he diſcharged all his at-
tendants, and, to make ſhort of the
ftory, Hi$ HOLINESS paſſed the whole
night with her! before they parted,
L 3
he
( 118 )
he gave her full abſolution, not only
for every ſin the had, but all the
might hereafter commit.
Now, gentlemen, I have my mo-
ther's word for it, (and ber bonour can-
not be doubted) that I am the fruit of
that amour.
SUPPLEMENT..
SUPPLEMEN T.
GENTLEMEN,
The Baron omitted a very material
part of his father's journey acroſs the
Engliſh Channel to Holland, which,
that it may not be totally loft, I
ſhall faithfully relate in his own
words, as I heard him repeat it to
his fon.
On
( 120 )
« On my arrival at Helvoetſluys I
"I was obſerved to breathe with ſome
difficulty; upon the inhabitants
" enquiring into the cauſe, I informed
" them that the animal upon whoſe
« back I rode from Harwich acroſs
« to their ſhore did not ſwim ! ſuch
“is their peculiar form and diſpoſi-
« tion that they cannot float or
“ move upon the water; but he
with incredible ſwiftneſs
upon
the fands from ſhore to
“ fhore, driving fiſh in millions be-
s fore him,. many of which were
quite different from any I had yet
“ ſeen, carrying their heads at the
“ extremity of their tails. I croſſed,
« continued he, one prodigious range
* of rocks, equal in height to the
Alps,
ran
!
( 121 )
Alps *, on the ſides of which there
were a great variety of tall, noble
trees, loaded with marine fruit;
« ſuch as lobſters, crabs, oyſters,
ſcollops, muſſels, cockles, &c. &c.
" ſome of which were a cart-load
ſingly! and none leſs than a por-
se ter's! all thoſe which are brought
« on ſhore, and ſold in our markets,
" are of an inferior dwarf kind, or
properly waterfals, i. e. fruit ſhook
« off the branches of the tree it
grows
upon by the motion of the water,
“ as thoſe in our gardens are by that
" of the wind! the lobſter - trees
* The tops or highet parts of theſe marine
mountains are ſaid to be upwards of one hundred
fathom below the ſurface of the ſea.
appeared
( 122 )
" appeared the richeſt, but the crab
“ and oyſters were the talleſt. The
perrywinkle is a kind of ſhrub, it
grows at the foot of the oyſter tree,
" and twines round it as the ivy does
" the oak. I obſerved the effects of
“ ſeveral accidents by ſhipwreck, &c.
“ particularly a ſhip that had been
o wrecked by ſtriking againſt another
“ mountain or rock, the top of which
" lay within three fathom of the ſur-
o face. As the ſunk, ſhe fell upon
« her fide, and forced a very large
" lobſter-tree out of it's place. It
" was in the ſpring, when the lobé
" fters were very young, and many
“ of them being ſeparated by the
s violence of the lhock, they fell
upon
( 123 )
upon a crab-tree which was grow-
“ ing below them; they have, like
“ the farina of plants, united, and
produced a fiſh reſembling both.
“ I endeavoured to bring one with
“ me, but it was too cumberſome,
" and my falt-water Pegaſus ſeemed
" much diſpleaſed at every attempt
" to ſtop his career, whilft I conti-
“ nued upon his back ; beſides, I
“ was then, though gallopping over
“ a mountain of rocks that lay about
midway the paſſage, at leaſt five
« hundred fathom below the ſurface
“ of the ſea, and began to find the
"want of air inconvenient, therefore
“ I had no inclination to prolong the
« time; add to this my ftuation was
s in
( 124 )
« in other reſpects very unpleaſant ;
“ I met many large fiſh who were,
« if I could judge by their open
« mouths, not only able, but really
wiſhed to devour us; now, as my
" Rofinante was blind, I had theſe
hungry gentlemen's attempts to
guard againſt, in addition to my
" other difficulties.
CS
“ As 'we drew near the Dutch
« fhore, and the body of water over
" our heads did not exceed twenty
“ fathom, I thought I ſaw a human
figure in a female dreſs then lying
“ upon the ſand before me with ſome
figns of life ; when I came quite
« clofe, I perceived her hand move ;
I
( 125 )
" I took it into mine, and brought
o her on ſhore as a corpſe. Ani
apothecary, who had juſt been
" inſtructed by Dr. Hawes * of
"
London, treated her properly,
" and the recovered. She was the
ribof a man who commanded
“ a veſſel belonging to Helvoer-
fluys; he was juſt going out of
« on a voyage, when ſhe, hearing he
s had got a miſtreſs with him, fol-
« lowed him in an open boat; as
• foon as the had got on the quarter-
• deck the flew at her huſband, and
4:attempted to ſtrike him with ſuch
port
A
The Baron's father muft have lived very
lately if Dr. Hawes was his preceptor...
M impetuofity,
( 126 )
impetuofity, that he thought it
si moſt prudent to flip on one ſide,
« and let her, make the impreſſion of
“ her fingers, upon the waves rather
" than his face; he was not much out
os in his ideas of the conſequence;
“ for meeting no oppaſition, . Ihre
« went directly overboard, and it
" was my unfortunate lot to lay the
«foundation for bringing this happy
“pair together again.
« 1 çan, ſays he, eaſily.conceive
what execrations the huſband load
ved me with, when, upon his return,
“ he found this gentle creature wait-
"sing his arrival, and learned the
" means by which ſhe came into the
« world
( 147 )
« world again. However, great as
" the injury is which I have done
« this poor devil, I hope he will die
« in charity with me, as my motive
“ was good, though the conſequences
" to him are, it muſt be confeſſed,
" horrible.
« I preſume, added he, you will
" think it extraordinary that I could
< breathe for ſo long a period in the
« dominions of Neptune. I confeſs I
" [hould never have been able to have
** performed the journeyi if this :
Watry God had not ſent to my
" affiſtance that lovely creature his
daughter Thetis, whoſe
appear-
ance to me in a dream, as before
" related,
M.2
( 128 )
« related, was the cauſe of this ada
(t venture.
2
When the Baron left us this even-
ing he forgot, ſaid his relation, an
adventure that does him great credit,
as a friend to the Engliſh.
On his return from Gibralter be
travelled by way of France to Eog.
lands being a foreigner, this was
not attended with any inconvenience:
to him. He found in the harbour.
of Calais a ſhip juſt arrived, with a
number of Engliſh ſailors as priſoners
of war. He immediately conceived
an idea of giving theſe brave fellows
their liberty, which he accompliſhed
as
( 129 )
A
as follows: After forming a pair of
large wings, each of them forty
yards long and fourteen wide, and
annexing them to himſelf, he
mounted at break of day, when
every creature, even the watch upon
deck, were faſt alleep; as he hover-
ed over the ſhip, he faſtened three
grapling irons to the tops of the
three maſts with his ling, and fairly
lifted her ſeveral yards out of the
water, and then proceeded acroſs
to Dover, where he arrived in half
an hour ! having no further occaſion
for theſe wings, he made them a
preſent to the governor of Dover
Caſtle, where they are now exhibited
to the curious.
M3
As
( 130 )
As to the priſoners, and the
Frenchmen who guarded them, they
did not wake till they had been near
two hours in Dover Pier. The mo-
ment the Engliſhmen underſtood
their ſituation, they changed places
with their guard, and took back
what they had been plundered of,
but no more, for they were too ge-
nerous to retaliate, and plunder them
in return.
HEADS
H E A D S
OF THE ESTABLISHED
F A A C T S
Contained in this VOLUME.
Page
PREFACE to the firft edition
Preface to the ſecond edition
Preface to the third edition, with reference to
the veracity of the author
ibid
The Baron fets off for Ruffia
6
- fufpends his horſe by miſtake to the
fpire of a ſteeple
7
Shoots the bridle, and brings him down again 8
Attacked by a wolf
Whips him into his horſe
Kills fifty brace of ducks beſide other birds at
15
Flogs
10
Il
one thot
( 132 )
19
21
25
Page
Flogs a fox out of his ſkin
16
Separates two ſows by a thot
18
Catches and carries home a wild boar
Shoots a ſtag in the head with cherry-ſtones,
from whence ſprang a tree
Blows up a boar by two flints meeting 24
Turns a wolf inſide out
A fur cloak infected with madneſs
26
The Baron’s greyhound runs off his legs 29
His dog litters whilft purſuing a hare
30
A hare litters whilſt purſued by his dog ibid
The Baron makes his horſe jump in at a one
pair of ſtairs window, and dance upon a
tea board without breaking cup or faucer
33.
His horſe divided and put together again 39
Sprigs of laurel grow up from the horſes hind
quarters, and form a bower for the Baron
as he rides
41
The Baron fold for a llave
42
Two bears hunt a bee
ibid
The Baron follows his hatchet to the moon and
returns
43
Falls two miles to the earth
45
Digs
( 133 )
46.
Page
Digs himſelf out of a hole upwards of fifty feet
deep with his nails
ibid
Paſſes a carriage in a narrow lane in a manner
not eaſily conceived
The extraordinary productions of a French-
horn
49
In danger of being ſhip-wrecked by a whale 52
A failor moſt wonderfully ſaved by a gall 53
The Baron's head thrown into his ftomach ibid
The whale runs away with the ſhip
54
Loſe their beft anchor and find it again
55
Springs a leak, which the Baron ſtops with the
gifts of nature
The Baron gets a new birth in the Mediterra-
56
nean
58
1
Saves his life by dancing a hornpipe ibid
The Baron diſcovers a balloon in the air at
Conſtantinople
бо
Particulars relative to the perfon ſuſpended
from it
61 to 66
The Baron goes on an embaffy to Grand Cairo 67
Returns by the Nile, which cafts him and his
barge on the top of an almond tree 69
Recovers his barge, and arrives at Conftanti.
nople
70
The
( 134 )
72
Page
The Grand Seignior introduces all his wives
and other women to the Baron
71
The Bároń arrives at Gibralter in Lord Rod-
ney's fleet
Makes an old woma'n by chance fwallow a
forty-eight pounder, which paſſes in a na-
tural way, but not pleaſantly
74
He finks a firſt-rate Spaniſh ſhip
75
Throws three hundred of the enemy's cannon
into the ſea, then burns their carriages and
and ammunition waggons, and ſaved Gib-
ralter
79
Count D'Artois's flight to Paris deſcribed 80
The Baron faves the lives of two Engliſh officers
by an effort almoſt incredible
83
Account of a ſling of peculiar virtue
85
The ſituation of Noah's ark diſputed, and by
whom
ibid
One of the Baron's anceſtors on the female fide,"
introduced, and ſome account of her 86
Shakeſpeare releaſed from priſon by the Baron's
great great grandfather, and the very fin-, .
gular means by which it was accompliſhed 88
Anecdote of Queen Elizabeth, the authenticity
of which cannot bę doubted
ibid
( 135 )
.
Page
a tale
92 and
The Baron's father dreams, and thereby hangs
89
The Baron's father attacked by a ſea-horſe go
Makes a trip to Holland upon his back
.91
Singular peculiarities appertaining to the
ſing
93
The whole college of phyſicians in London
take an airing for three months
94
The dreadful conſequences of their abſence
96
The apothecaries kindly prevent a general
bankruptcy amongſt the undertakers ibid
The Baron fails with Captain Pps, now
Lord M-gove
97
Attacks two bears upon the ice, and chops of
ſeveral of their toes
99
Shoots-one, takes off the ſkin, and puts it on
himſelf
ibid
Becomes" familiar with thouſands of them by
mimicking their actions, and afterwards
kills them all
-101
Brings their ſkins and haunches to England
Receives a general invitation, to dine with the
corporation of London
104
A certain Empreſs propoſes to marry the Baron,
but he modeſtly declines the honor ibid
He
102
( 136.)
Page
He apologizes for Captain P-ps's ſhortening
his laſt voyage, and afligns weighty reafons
for it
106
The Baron throws a large piece of braſs ord-
nance acroſs the fea, and afterwards by ac-
cident lets it fall in
The Grand Seignior iſſues an order to cut off
his head
ibid
He eſcapes by the aſſiſtance of a ſultana 113
The Baron's friend gives an account of his origin 114
The Pope ftops to eat oyſters, and paſs the
evening with his mother
117
She receives abſolution
118
II2
SUPPLEMENT.
The Baron's father mounts a fea-horſe, and
paſſes upon the bottom of the channel from
Harwich to Helvoetſluys. Deſcribes the
various objects he fees in his paſſage, parti-
cularly lobſter, oyſter, crab, and other trees.
Reſtores a ſcolding wife to life, and avoids
with great difficulty being devoured by ſea
monſters
119 to 127
The Baron releaſes a fhip full of Engliſh pri-
Soners in rather an unuſual way 128 to the end.
FINI S.
رررر
انبار
:')
C
C
T
)
1