MAKE-UP 13UUK-HOW TO “MAKE-UP.” A practical guide r Amateurs, with Twenty-three Colored Illustrations. CCXLVI. FRENCH'S MINOR DRAMA. 1 feting 6bition. a - ' .v ■- A A BURLETTA, IN ONE ACT. BY DION BOUCICAULT, ESQ. TO WHICH ABE ADDED A description of the Costumes—Cast of Characters—Entrances and Exits— Relative Positions of Performers on the Stage, and the whole of the Stage Business. AS NOW PERFORMED AT THE PRINCIPAL ENGLISH AND AMERICAN THEATRES. New York -SAMUEL FRENCH PUBLISHER 28-30 WEST 3STH STREET London SAMUEL FRENCH, Ltd. 26 Southampton Street, STRAND MAKE=UF BOX. Containing Rouge, Pearl Powder, Whiting, Mongolian, Ruddy Rouge, Violet Powder x and Puff, Chrome, Blue, Burnt Cork, Pencils for the eyelids, Spirit Gum, India Ink, mel Hair Brushes, Hare's Foot, Wool, Craped Hair, Cold Cream, Joining Paste, Min- jre Puffs, Scissors and Looking Glass ; packed neatly in Strong Fancy Card-board xes, $4 00 ; F.legant Tin Cases, $5.00 HE -ABOVE ARTICLES TO BE HAD SEPARATELY Fsr Prices, see Catologoa FRENCH’S STANDARD DRAMA Price 15 Cents each.—Bound Volumes $1.25. VOL. I. 1 Ion 2 Fazio 3 The Lady of Lyons 4 Richelieu 6 The Wife 6 The Honeymoon 7 The School for Scandal 8 Money VOL. II. 9 The Stranger 10 Grandfather Whitehead 11 Richard III 12 Love’s Sacrifice 13 The Gamester 14 A Cure for the Heartache 15 The Hunchback 16 Don Caesar de Bazan VOL. III. 17 The Poor Gentleman 18 Hamlet 19 Charles II 20 Venice Preserved 21 Pizarro 22 The Love Chase 23 Othello 24 Lend me Five Shillings VOL. IV. 25 Virginius 26 King of the Commons 21 London Assurance 28 The Rent Day 29 Two Gentlemen ofVerona 30 The Jealous Wife 31 The Rivals 32 Perfection VOL. V. [Debts 33 A New Way to Pay Old 84 Look Before You Leap 35 King John 86 Nervous Man 37 Damon and Pythias 38 Clandestine Marriage 39 William Tell 40 Day after the Wedding VOL. VI. 41 Speed the Plough 42 Romeo and Juliet 43 Feudal Times 44 Charles the Twelfth 45 The Bride 46 The Follies of a Night 47 Iron Chest [Fair Lady 48 Faint Heart Never Won VOL. VII. 49 Road to Ruin 50 Macbeth 51 Temper 52 Evadne 53 Bertram 54 The Duenna 55 Much Ado About Nothing 66 The Critic VOL. VIII. 57 The Apostate 58 Twelfth Night 59 Brutus 60 Simpson & Co 61 Merchant of Venice 62 Old Heads&Young Hearts 63 Mountaineers [riage 64 Three Weeks after Mar- VOL. IX. 65 Love 66 As You Like It 67 The Elder Brother 68 Werner 69 Gisippus 70 Town and Country 71 King Lear 72 Blue Devils VOL. X. 73 Henry VIII 74 Married and Single 75 Henrv IV 76 Paul Pry 77 Guy Mannering 78 Sweethearts and W ives 79 Serious Family 80 Sne Stoops to Conquer VOL. XI. 81 Julius Ca:sar 82 Vicar of Wakefield 83 Leap Year 84 The Catspaw 85 The Passing Cloud 86 Drunkard 87 Rob Roy 88 George Barnwell VOL. XII. 89 Ingomar 90 Sketches in India 91 Two Friends 9V Jane Shore 93 Corsican Brothers 94 Mind your own Business 95 Writing on the Wall 96 Heir at Law VOL. XIII. 97 Soldier’s Daughter 9 s Douglas 99 Marco Spada 100 Nature’s Nobleman 101 Sardanapalus 102 Civilization 103 The Robbers 104 Katharine and Petruchio VOL. XIV. 105 Game of Love 106 Midsummer Night’s 107 Ernestine [Dream 108 Rag Picker of Paris 109 Flying Dutchman 110 Hypocrite 111 Therese 112 La Tour de Nesle VOL. XV. 113 Ireland As It Is 114 Sea of Ice 115 Seven Clerks 116 Game of Life 117 Forty Thieves 118 Bryan Boroihme 119 Romance and Reality 120 Ugolino V_L. XVI. 121 The Tempest 122 The Pilot 123 Carpenter of Rouen 1 4 King’s Rival 125 Little Treasure 126 Dombey and Son 12" Parents and Guardians lid Jewess VOL. XVII. 129 Camille 130 Married Life 131 Wen lock of Wenlock 132 Rose of Ettrickvale 133 David Copperfield 134 Aline, or the Rose of 135 Pauline [Killarney 136 Jane Eyre VOL. XVIII. 137 Night and Morning 138 Aithiop 139 Three Guardsmen 140 Tom Cringle 141 Henriette, the Forsaken 142 Eustache Baudin 143 Ernest Maltravera 144 Bold Dragoons VOL. XIX. 145 Dred, or the Dismal [Swamp 146 Last Days of Pompeii 147 Esmeralda 148 Peter Wilkins 149 Ben the Boatswain 150 Jonathan Bradford 151 Retribution 152 Minerali VOL. XX. 153 French Spy 154 Wept of Wish-ton Wish 155 Evil Genius 156 Ben Bolt 167 Sailor of France 158 Red Mask 159 Life of an Actress 160 Wedding Day VOL. XXL 161 All’s Fair in Love 162 Hofer 163 Self 164 Cinderella 165 Phantom 166 Franklin [Moscow 167 The G unmaker of 168 The Love of a Prince VOL. XXII. 169 Son of the Night 170 Rory O’More 171 Golden Eagle ’72 Rienzi 173 Broken Sword 174 Rip Van Winkle 175 Isabelle 176 Heart of Mid Lothian VOL. XXIII. 177 Actress of Padua 178 Floating Beacon 179 Bride of Lammermoor 180 Cataract of the Ganges 181 Robber of the Rhine 182 School of Reform 183 Wandering Boys 184 Mazeppa VOL. XXIV. 185 Young New York 186 The Victims 187 Romance after Marriage 188 Brigand 189 Poor of New York 190 Ambrose Gwinett 191 Raymond and Agnes 192 Gambler’s Fate VOL. XXV. 193 Father and Son 194 Mnssauiello 195 Sixteen String Jack 196 Youthful Queen 197 Skeleton Witness 198 Innkeeper of Abbeville 199 Miller and his Men 200 Aladdin VOL. XXVI. 201 Adrienne the Actress 202 Undine 203 Jesse Brown 204 Asmodeus 205 Mormons 206 Blanche of Brandywine 207 Viola 208 Deseret Deserted VOL. XXVII. 209 Americans in Paris 210 Victorine 211 Wizard of the Wave 212 Castle Spectre 213 Horse-shoe Robinson 2K Armand, Mrs. Mowatt 21 Fashion, Mrs. Mowatt 216 Glance at New York VOL. XXVIII. 217 Inconstant 218 Uncle Tom’s Cabin 219 Guide to the Stage 220 Veteran 221 Miller of New Jersey 222 Dark Hour before Dawn 223 Midsum’rNight’sDream [Laura Keene’s Edition 224 Art and Artifice VOL. XXIX. 225 Poor Young Man 226 Ossawattomie Brown 227 Pope of Rome 228 Oliver Twist 229 Pauvrette 230 Man in the Iron Mask 231 Knight of Arva 232 Moll Pitcher VOL. XXX. 233 Black Eyed Susan 234 Satan in Paris 235 Rosina Meadows [ess 236 West End, or Irish Heir- 237 Six Degrees of Crime 238 The Lady and the Devil 239 Avenger, or Moor of Sici- 240 Masks and Faces [ly {French's Standard Drama Continued on %dpage of Cover.) VOL. XXXI. 241 Merry Wives of Wi: 242 Mary’s Birthday 243 Shandy Maguire 244 Wild Oats 245 Michael Erie 246 Idiot Witness 247 Willow Copse 248 People’s Lawyer VOL. XXXII. 249 The Boy Martyrs 250 Lucretia Borgia 251 Surgeon of Paris 252 Patrician’s Daughte 253 Shoemaker of Toul 254 Momentous Questioi 255 Love and Loyalty 256 Robber’s Wife VOL. XXXIII. 257 Dumb Girl of Genoa 2o8 Wreck Ashore 259 Clari 260 Rural Felicity 261 Wallace 262 Madelaine 263 The Fireman 264 Grist to the Mill VOL. XXXIV. 265 Two Loves and a Li 266 Annie Blake 267 Steward 268 Captain Kyd 269 Nick of the Woods 270 Marble Heart 271 Second Love 272 Dream at Sea VOL. XXXV. 273 Breach of Promise 274 Review 275 Lady of the Lake 276 Still Water Runs D< 277 The Scholar 278 Helping Hands 279 Faust and Margueril 280 Last Man VOL. XXXVT. 281 Belle’s Stratagem 282 Old and Young 283 Raffaella 284 Ruth Oakley 285 British Sir ve 2»6 A Life’s Ransom 287 Giralda 28;> Time Tries All VOL. XXXVII. 289 Ella Rosenburg 290 Warlock of the Glen 291 Zelina 292 Beatrice 293 Neighbor Jack wood 294 Wonder 295 Robert Emmet 296 Green Bushes VOL. XXXVIII. 297 Flowers of the Fores' 298 A Bachelor of Arts 299 The Midnight Banqu 300 Husband of in Hour 301 Love’s Labor Lost 302 Naiad Queen 303 Caprice 304 Cradle of Liberty VOL. XXXIX. 305 The Lost Ship 306 Country Squire 307 Fraud and its Victim 308 Putnam 309 King and Deserter 310 La F.ammina 311 A Hard Struggle 312 Gwinnette Vaughan VOL. XL. 313 The Love Knot [Jc 314 Lavater, or Not a 315 The Noble Heart 316 Coriolanus 317 The Winter’s Tale 318 Eveleen Wilson 319 Iranhoe 320 Jonathan in England SAMUEL FRENCH, 28-30 West 38th Street, New York City. New and Explicit Descriptive Catalogue Mailed Free on Request A LOVER BY PROXY. A BURLETTA, IlST ONE C T - BY / DION BOURCICAULT, Esquire, AUTHOR OF London Assurance—Victor and Hortense—Alma Mater—The Phantom—■ The Young Actress—Andy Blake—Li fe of an Actress—Blue Belle — Chamelion — Willow Copse — Old Heads and Young Hearts — Irish Heiress — Genevieve—Louis the 1 Ith—Janet Pride — The Fox Chase—The Queen of Spades — Etc. WITH ORIGINAL CASTS, COSTUMES, AND THE WHOLE OF THE STAGE BUSINESS, CORRECTLY MARKED AND ARRANGED, BY MR. J. B. WRIGHT, ASSISTANT MANAGER OF THE BOSTON THEATRE. New York SAMUEL FRENCH PUBLISHER London SAMUEL FRENCH, Ltd. 26 Southampton Street, STRAND \ m « H £* O ◄ Pi < W D Ph o GO «! o 43 o I a O * » o bo™ c3 • m r D 0 ) w « £«*S § • . . , o i- a .'tj aj O q* O id m S ^ 03 £ ■M <0 c> CQ • CO «22 c> •(<» •H „<3 z£ £ • r? •®J8 a§ * - *- ^ ? »h '- M u • £li« s oJPh >1 *■* . ea “ ca ^jj; is • * WStflOH ■ *3 V* * s* V* S'* '*'*'* *a~ . oB-=fl 45 ^2 a> 43 = O Zl CS mj ^ ^ • 03 co co .* .# «* * CO to „oo Sr*’-* Q rv §£ 03 (3 o> t- 4) U ,* S- « .go fan top a ►>.s $ ^ c c 2 s«J 5 K^OHO ^ M S * g -C • . V- £> o 32 S cM bcS 32 • ea ca K-3^03 • 00 • 01 CO CO to 02 ^ ^ ^ * >m ssss c c3 •a *e a in 42 —I *- r 3 hr •— s o 44 P3t> s-cQ O . e8 • ►-sEhOhCQ s ss I • w 0) -*-» ti • r—i £ co w . W f- r5 » -*4> +>.!: c$ r3 ■« o MS -w o e« ea S- 13 ■e2 c o e« — «H ea o (2 Ti a ea ,to ta a o u ea o ea o u «« m O ™ . «*S- x ea a ea 2 to o o ^ • 5 <32 . o ” t- ®43 *” C S ^ O * 0*5 £ 2 ^ ” eaS«.2|2J •-ioa^ co a m *3 12 H T 3 o fe ^ 03 ea a 2 ^ ^ T3 'C T o CO X w Jm lL_ O .• -«-» »rt ^ o«a"a _* 9 to O •a i-S,2 a > « s i-sp^-gts 03 a a-a g-s rA . o> SJ ? a £ £ •Tm • ^ _o 43 *^'g : _ O ^ OJ ^ 2 . «*j M •* a 92 „ rt a “2 « ^'a ^’°o§ 2 cc^ 55 co u 8=3 h 0 SS|-® 2 « - S !S rt-a o O) . . M o P *a taC^ ' ,. 5? a -*2 r^v ^ CO CV 2 o ;« a) c Tt m s u g^i «2 c h ° c -i2 =•- 92(2 ■2 | o£ cq I ^j> r *r , ti 0^0 J- H *-J hj tf 5 ? S — ►r « ao m co ^ S t? ea < J cv. r, 00 . K c/2 1 I5BCQ®55XSXK o ja a o to ^ to - ^ 9- , a 4 C ea *S u o> CO •• *- C C - 6 * aS £ §0 .p*«—* £f| ,4«C^ ► IS h, it was from excess, that choked its utterance! [Seizes her hand.] Let me thus imprint upon this lily leaf, the seal of [Aside. J—Damme, I forgot ! I’m making love on my own account here! Spare him oae word! [ She sinks into his arms.] Well, exactly; that is a better idea, and much more expressive*—that speaks a dic¬ tionary. Kite. An I too boll? Liw. Notin the least my dear. [Aside. I She is in my arms, and I am wretche l! Kite Under my apparent levity I hid the deepest sensibilities. Law. You did, I know it! Kite. You think me too affectionate? • Liw. Not a bit ; give free course to your feelings ! [Aside.] She certainly is more affectionate than what I expected. [Aloud.) May I inform the L J J Kt'e l know what you mean— yes ! [Rises. Liw. The hippy day will be- Kj.te My dear Harry !- L iw. [ Aside.] Hallo !—what will I do now ? Kite. You will always love me ? Tiw. [Aside. J Whew! the murder’s out! It’s me she’s in love with. . , Kate. You are silent. Law. l am, dear; it’s the contending sensibilities aroused. Kite. By my questions ? Law. Precisely. Kate. Do you hesitate ? { Jlw ’ hesitate ! I never hesitated in all my life—it is not in my nature. What am I to do! J Kate. Don’t you remember what you said ? Jj iw ’Pon my soul I don’t! What was it ? Kate. You said you loved me ^ate QhT Wh ° dareS ^ Say 1 d ° n,t ? Sh ° W me the man ’ and ^ A LOVER BY TROXY. 17 Law. Eh, dear! Kate. Pray let me retire and compose myself. Law. I’ll go and be composed, too. Kat$. Only for a few moments. [Aside.'] Now I'll go and have a good cry ! [Exit. R. h. 1. e. Law. How she loves me! Angelic, delightful creature ! But what will Blush say when he knows it all? He should have provided against such a contingency. She couldn’t help it, of course not! £he’s susceptible and—ahem!—discriminating ; it’s her nature ! Well, I’m I damn 'd insinuating; I can’t help that,—it’s my peculiarity ; in fact, we both can’t help it. Enter Blushington, c. d. l. h. and comes down l.’ Blu. Where is Harriet ? Law. I thought you were gone to the charity boys. Blu. No, the rector has just called, as we were about to start. Laiv. [r J Peter!—[ solemnly j—take a scat. [They sit. Blu. Well! Law. Is it ? You will think otherwise, presently. Blu. What’s to do now ? Law. Nothing—it’s all done! Blu. Who ? Law. You ! Now my dear boy, I am sure you will exonerate me from any purposed evil intentions toward you ; —I was quite unaware of the existence of feelings of this nature, for I am the last chap in the world to nourish- Blu. What mischief are you driving at ? Law. To nourish sensibilities the growth of which could only be estimated by an inverse ratio of your happiness! Blu. You are getting mathematical! Law. Wait, and you’ll be getting miserable ! I have proposed for you. Blu. The devil you have !—you have lost no time. Lazv. Yes, but you have lost your mistress! Blu. How ? Law. Oh, very easily ; —you must hedge. Blu. Hedge! Law. Carefully. She thought my advocation of your cause so ex¬ cellent, that she nonsuited Peter Blushington, the ^laintift, and the cause fell into the arms of the counsel for ditto ! Blu. How ? Law. Indiscriminately. What could I do ? You would not have me repel her adoration ? Blu. Why, yon don't mean to say- Law. Yes, I do ! Blu What! that Miss Bromley threw herself into your arms ? Law. So it struck me. Blu. What, without any provocation on your part ? Law. Tardon me !—( pulling up his collar ,)—personal appearance! Blu. And you, sir—you abetted her ? Law. No, T didn't I kissed her ! Blu. You did ? 18 A LOVER BY PROXY. Law. I did ; it’s a peculiarity I’ve got. BLu. I’m overwhelmed with wonder. Law. .Not more than 1 was, I assure you. I pleaded for you witu all my heart. You wouldn’t marry the woman that is in love with me- BLu. [Rising ) Mr. Lawless, this breach of every manly and hon¬ orable feeling, to which you plead guilty with such insensible and hardened nonchalance , can only be answered through the medium or some mutual friend, sir. Law. Fire away ! I’m the mutual friend. Blu. Fire away ! Lawless, this language is disgusting. Not con¬ tent with betraying your friend in the most tender point, you descend trout the name ot gentleman, sir, when you introduce your unfeeling levity of language to combat his direct accusations. ‘What can you expect from me after this conduct ? Law. Expect? Christian fortitude and pious resignation ! Look at me ;—see how cool I am ! Remark the placid philosophy with which I bear your misfortunes ! With the stern bent of a Brutus— the spirit of a Damon—I have determined to sacrifice myself on the altar of devoted friendship! Fay no more ; (rising.) I feel for your situation ; I’ll give up her fortune to you, whatever it is, and you shall have the other sister into the bargain. I’ll marry her for your sake !—there, send that down to your posterity for fact, and if they’re not astonished, damme ! • Bla. You shall not marry her! Law. There’s ingratitude!—there! who talks of unfeeling levity now ? Well, if that’s my thapks, I’ll packet my magnanimity after that! Blu. Do you mean this for badinage, sir? Otherwise let me assure you that 1 consider it insulting, and request, —nay, demand an apol¬ ogy. Law. (Looking at him with surprise .] Ah, poor fellow !—(crosses to l.) —I was too sudden with my information ; —distrained his attics ! Adieu, Peter ! Blu. Stay, sir ! Law. Hush ! I’ll send the servants : quiet will do you good, be¬ lieve me it will. Blu. I insist- Ljuw. Ah ! I’ll order two grains of opium, ditto Dover’s powder in some milk. Blu. Lawless !- Law. Compose yourself ; get to sleep, do, and I’ll see you in the morning. (Exit pitifully. 1. e. l. h. Blu. I scarcely know which most to reprobate ; the unfeeling rail¬ lery of that brainless idiot, or the shameless coquetry of that perfidi¬ ous girl! she knew I loved her—she must have known. I see it all; wearied by my ridiculous silence—the mauvai.s honte which T find it impossible to shake off. has laid her heart open to the insidious arts of that unfeeling wretch ! Enter Harriet, r. h. 1 . e. We are ready to go now. Peter. I>lu. Pardon me, madam ; I fear that it will be out of my power to accompany you. A LOVER BY PROXY. 19 liar. How so ? Blu. 1 am about to start for London instantly. liar. What has happened? Blu. Can you as^ me ? liar. Good gracious ! anything dreadful ? Blu. Overwhelinning to me, madam, though indifferent, it seems, to you. Har Is your bank broke ? Blu. My bank ! No, madam ! my heart has broke, after lavishing its parse of feelings on a desperate object, you— liar. What have I done? Blu. Have you uot in the most marked manner encouraged my addresses ? Har. Well ? Blu. And but now, were you not in the arms of one who is to you a comparative stranger? Do you not for him reject the heart that still adores you — which, though it breaks upon the word, now bids you farewell for ever! (Exit, c. d. l. h. liar. Blushington ! Peter ! I beseech —my brain’s bewildered ! Oh, here comes Mr. Lawless ; he perhaps, can clear away this mys¬ tery ! (Enter Lawless, with a letter, l. h. 1 e.) My dear sir, can you tell me what has happened? Law. I cannot, at present. liar. Mr. Blush— Law . Oh, you’ve seen him, then. Har. He suddenly upbraided me with I know not what, and dash¬ ed out of the room ! Law. Ah, he’s very mad—further gone than I thought he was! Har. Where is he gone, did you say?—where shall we find him? Law. You never bet, I suppose ? liar. Bet, sir ? Law. Oh, nothing ; only if \ ou did, I’d give long odds you find him at the bottom of the nearest horse pond. Har. Sir ! Law. Or ordering the largest washing-tub on the premises, for a series of hydraulic experiments ! Mar. Can it be possible ? Law. Certainly, I’ll hold you two to one 1 drown myself in a wash¬ ing basin, for you see anything which is sufficiently capacious to ex- c.ude the atmospheric air by the introduction of an acqueous fluid c luses a suspension of the animal functions ( Exit Harriet, r. h. 1 e.) i.i toto, because—hollo ! she’s off. ( Enter Nibbs. l. h. 1 e.) I say you, sir. come here, deliver this letter with all speed. (N bbs retires up) 1 begin to thaw towards Blushington. That letter to Kate will clinch the affairs in that quarter—it is to ask her to e’ope with me at once —to save time and trouble I’ll rescue the maniac. (Exit, l h. 1 e. Nib. Hollo! sir! sir! who’s the letter for?—you forgot— Squ. (coming from c. n ) Here’s a lark ! Nib. Yes. I think it is why here’s your master given me a letter to deliver with stopping to say who to. Squ. Look at the direction old greens. 20 A LOVER BY PROXY. Nib. Look yourself young brocoli. Squ. Why there aint none. Nib. What’s to be done ? Squ. Give it the first as comes, he’ll open it, see who it is for, and forward it accordingly. ( Enten- Miss Penelope Prude, r. h. 1 e.) There’s a beautiful direction. Nib. Please ma’am here’s a letter for you. Miss P. From whom ? Nib. Mr. Lawless, ma’am. Miss P. (Opens it and reads.) “My own dear love oh, give me a chair. (Staggers back , Squib catches her. Nibbs brings chair.) Squ. A chair, quick : make haste old fellow, my sitiwation aint no sinyqueer. ( seats her) She’d make fifteen stone seven kick the beam. Miss P. I was quite overcome. Squ. So was I werry near. Miss P. Leave the room. Squ. Consider it hewackivated, mum. (She puts on her spectacles — Nibbs and Squib look over her shoulders.) “ My own dear Love ,— You will be surprised at the tenor of this letter , but a late conversation with Blushington renders it imperative. He asserts that you are in love with him.” (Oh, what an infamous wretch !) “ But Ido not believe it.” (No, I should think not indeed.) “ You cannot doubt my love , my unalterable devoted attachment—may I rely on yours. 1 for¬ got to ask you how you would like our little affair to come off an elopement is effective but very expensive , and I'm quite cleaned out at present —(quite cleaned out.) Its a peculiarity I have had since the last Derby , so will you speak to the squire and beseech him to accede to the prayers of your fond ” “ Harry Lawless.” Squ. Oh ! ( whispering) She’s hewaporating off again. Nib. I shan’t stop. Squ. I shall — (aloud)— beg pardon, ma’am. Miss P. (screaming) Oh ! I thought you were gone. Squ. Did you now, ma’am? No, I was vaiting permiscusly about like. Miss P. Pm sure I didn’t see you. Squ. ’Taint natural as you should, cos your heyes isn’t in the nape of your neck, but pleasantly sitiwated in their husual occupation. Miss P. What do you want? Squ. Any answer mum? Miss P. No. Squ. Oh, any little curiosity about your person mum, jest to con- wince him as you got it. Miss. P. What shall 1 send ? Squ. I have change for a sovereign. Miss. P. Oh, 1 understand—there’s a sovereign, give me nineteer shillings and sixpence young man. Squ. I 11 procure that ere balance, (aside) There’s principles foi an old lady. Miss P. I will go ami consult my dear brother on this point, 1 ! was convinced something would turn up at last and it has. Exit , C. D. L. H A LOVER BY PROXY. 21 Squ. My guv’ner never intended this ere letter for Miss Penny- loaf Proud—here will be a shindy in two minutes, and 1 must see the fun somehow. Nib. Ah, but how ? Squ. Let’s see now. Nib. Make haste, here comes Mr. Bromley and my master. Squ. Here, you get behind the fire board. (Nibbs creeps into the fire place, 2 e. r. h.—Squib puts up the board before him—looks off—and gets under sofa , L C.) Enter Bromley and Blushington, c. d. r. h. Bro. (l. h.) But my dear sir, so sudden a departure, what is the cause ? Blu. (r. h.) Don’t ask me, Mr. Bromley. Bro. 1 must! I shall! I will! Blu. Well if I must be — you are aware that I have long been deeply attached to your eldest daughter. Bro. I have suspected as much. Blu. Well, sir, my infernal bashfulness prevented me from open¬ ly avowing my passion and addressing the lady, when Mr. Lawless undertook to— Bro. To make love for you. Blu. Precisely ; and I find that the object of my adoration has been made the victim of his insidious arts, and, in fine, is deeply in love with him. Bro. What! what, sir!—I say she shan’t be in love with him. Blu. Now are you surprised at my determination ? Bro. She shan’t have him. Bro. Excuse me, Mr. Bromley, I see Kate coming—permit me to retire. Exit , r h. 1 e. Enter Kate, l. h. 1 e. Kate. My dear father; you will be surprised at the subject I’m about to broach. Bro. Proceed. Kate. To cut a long story short, that, Mr. Lawless has proposed to me. Bro. What! the devil! he hasn’t been making love to both of my daughters. Kate. 1 love him, father, please may I have him ? Enter Miss P. Prude, c. d. l. h., with a letter. Miss P. Oh, brother, I have found you at last, read that and spare my blushes. Bro. I can’t, I won’t, I’m blind with rage, what is it about? Miss P. Mr. Lawless lays his hand and fortune at my feet. Bro. Damn me if the fellow doesn’t want to marry my whole family — I’m a magistrate, (crosses to r. and back) I’ll take him up for wilful intent at trigamy. ( Enter Lawless, l. h.) Oh. here’s the culprit_now, sir, how would you look if I was to commit you tor trial? . Law. Why, confound me, if Blushington hasn’t bitten the Old gentleman. . Bro. Look ye, sir, you did me the honor to invite yourself into 22 A LOVER BY PROXY. my house, you insult my tenants, you play the devil with my house¬ maids, and you throw the whole of my family into confusion, parti¬ cularly the female portion of it, and what apology do yon make? Law. It’s a peculiarity 1 have got. tiro. Then, sir, the sooner you and your peculiarities arc trans¬ planted to their proper soil, new Bedlam, the better for society. Miss P. (comes down , r. h.) Bedlam or Botany Bay 1 care not. his home shall be my home his couch my couch, (crosses to l. and tushes up to him ) Low. (running away) Hollo! by jove the old gentleman has bit¬ ten the old lady. Kate What can this mean? Enter Blushington and Harriet, r. h. 1 e. Ear. Mr. Lawless, pray did you ever offer me your hand, and did 1 ever accept it ? I demand a candid reply. Law. Never! Miss P. Never! of course not, that bliss is mine. Law. Is it ? Kate. No, mine, (comes down) Mr. B. There is some mistake there. Miss P. Base man, have you deceived me? (sits down on sofa, l. h.) Law. I 11 soon find it out. (calling off, l. h.1 Squib ! Squ. (from underneath the sofa) Yes, sir. (lifts up the sofa, the end resting on his shoulders—] Miss Prude screams out, and falls into Brom¬ ley s arms Squib overturns the sofa, and stands saluting — Bromley puts Aj iss Prude in an arm chair near the fire-place, R. H.) Law. How the devil did you get here? Squ. Thought you might want me — didn’t like to intrude sir here l am. Law. How did this mistake occur? Squ. Aly Nibbs, sir, delivered the letter wrong. Bhi. The Blundering rascal— where is he? Nibbs ! Nibbs * (the jin' screen tumbles down, and Nibbs appears covered with soot, r. h. 2 e Miss Prude screams) Law^ Where’s the letter I gave you for Miss Kate Bromley ? Nib. I gave it to Miss Prude. dL.s.s- P. And you did not mean to offer me your hand and fortune. Jmw. 1 never had a peculiarity that way. Mr. B. Penny, you’re a stupid old fool. Miss P. Sam, you’re a brute. B/a. (to Nibbs) Leave the room, sir. Law. (to Squib, who jumps up) Serve him as I did the horse and Squ. Shall be done, sir. (Exeunt Squib after Nibbs, l. h. 1 e.) vm* \t y° ur hand, Harry — forgive me, I have wronged y ifl B !’ omle y- are we to kneel in vain ? 1 f‘ ^ ou have loved my daughter? Blu. For three years nn^nf Take her Blushin gton—take her boy—though I am giving K y °' es awa A t° you. (Harriet and Blushington go up) Bate, (to Lawless) What stall we do ? A LOVER BY PROXY. 2 $ Law. (to Kate) Get on the blind side of him. Kate, (goes up to Bromley) Papa ! ( coaxingly ) Papa ! Law. Mr. Bromrny! Mr. B. (aside) I’ll hold out like the rock of Gibraltar! Law. You see, I love your daughter. Mr. B. Pooh, sir!—you have only known her for a few hours! Law. Oh, pardon me—for a month ! A brown satin shoe is pos¬ itively stereotyped in my imagination ! Will you give us leave to marry ? Mr. B. No ! Law. You obdurate old father ! Lend me ten pounds to run away with her. Mr. B. I’ll see you hang’d first! Law. Unreasonable old miser ! Now, this is very absurd of you, for you see we have made up our minds ! Mr. B. And so have I! Law. You refuse your consent? Mr. B. I do! Law. Once for all ?' Mr. B. Yes! Law. I’ll give you another chance. Mr. B. Everything is against you. Law. I hope not—let me see. (looks through his glass at the audience ) Have I not one friend here to second me. Bro. No, Pll answer for it. (going forward) Laio. Ahem—I’ll hold you two to one you lose. Bro. Done—ahem—gentlemen. Law. Ladies—aha! I had you there. You are all my especial peculiarities—ladies, this is an action brought by Samuel Bromley, plaintitf, against Harry Lawless, barrister-at law, defendant, to re¬ cover the heart of one Miss Kate Bromley, which aforesaid heart, with its appurtenances, &c., the defendant doth hereby claim to be seized of. Kate, I have opened the case—do you address the tribunal. Kate. Ahem. (imitating a barrister's manner) My luds.—The de¬ fendant has stated that my client has only been acquainted with Miss Kate Bromley for a few hours, surely my client must know his own feelings best. My luds. remember this is a very peculiar case : the lady at issue is my worthy client’s first brief. You have but to decide whether he has well sustained the character of the Lover by Proxy, and I sit down with the fullest confidence in your judgement, that a verdict will be returned for my client. My luds, on the bench and ladies of the jury, that is the plaintiffs case. SITUATIONS. Kate, Law. Mr. Brom. Miss Prude. (r. h ) Harriet. Mr. Blush. (L. H.) C UR T A 1 N. JUST PUBLISHED What Happened to Jones An Original Farce in Tiiree Acts By GEORGE H. BROABHURST CAST OF CHARACTERS JONES, who travel* for a hymn-book hoyse EBENEZER GOODLY, a professor of anatomy A'TONY GOODLY. D.D., Bishop of Ballarat RICHARD I f LATIIERL Y, engaged to Marjorie THOMAS HOLDER, a policeman WILLIAM BIGREE, an inmate of the Sanitarium HENRY FULLER, superintendent of the Sanitarium MRS. GOODLY, Ebenezer's wife CISSY, Ebenezer's ward MARJORIE, [ MINERVA, i Ebenezer's daughters ALVINA STARLIGHT, Mr. Goodly's sister IIELMa, a servant SYNOPSIS OF SCENES ACT 1.—Handsomely furnished room in home of Ebenezer Goodly. ACT 2.—The same. ACT 3.-The same. This is the jolliest sort of a farce, clean and sparkling all the "way through. A professor of anatomy is lured to a prize right and the police make a raid on the “mill.” The professor escapes to his Homo, followed by Jones, a traveling salesman, who sells hymn books when he can and playing cards when he cannot. The police are on the trail, so Jones disguises himself by putting on a Bishop’s garb, and a lot of funny complications ensue. The other funmakers are aided not a little by an escaped lunatic. This celebrated farce lias been a tremendous success for years on the professional stage and is now published for the first time. PRICE, 50 CENTS er-SEND FOR A NEW DESCRIPTIVE CATALOGUE. VOL. XLI. The Pirate’s Legacy The Charcoal Burner Adelgitha Senor Valiente Forest Rose Duke’s Daughter Camilla’s Husband Pure Gold VOL. XLII. Ticket of Leave Man Fool’s Revenge O’Neil the Great Handy Andy Pirate of the Isles Fanchon Little Barefoot Wild Irish Girl VOL. XLIII. Pearl of Savoy Dead Heart Ten N ights in a Bar-room Dumb Boy of Manchester Bel phegor the Moun teb’k Cricket on the Hearth Printer’s Devil Meg’s Diversion (French's Standard Drama Continued from 2d page of Cover.) VOL. L. 393 Fine Feathers 394 Prompter’s Box 395 Iron Master 396 Engaged 597 Pygmalion & Galatea 398 Leah 399 Scrap of Paper 400 Lost in London VOL. LI. 401 Octoroon 402 Confederate Spy 403 Mariner’s Return 404 Ruined by Drink 405 Dreams 406 M. P. 407 War 408 Birth VOL. LIL 409 Nightingale 410 Progress 411 Play 412 Midnight Charge 413 Confidential Clerk 414 Snowball 415 Our Regimens 416 Married for Money Hamlet in Three Acts Guttle & Gulpit VOL. XLIV. VOL. XLVII. 345 Drunkard’s Doom 369 Saratoga 346 Chimney Corner 370 Never Too Late to Mend 347 Fifteen Years of a Drunk- 371 Lily of France 348 No Thoroughfare I"ard’s 372 Led Astray 349 Peep O’ Day |_Life 373 Henry V 350 Everybody’s Friend 374 Unequal Match 351 Gen. Grant 375 May or Dolly’s Delusion 352 Kathleen Mavourneen 376 Allatoona VOL. XLV. VOL. XLVtII. 353 Nick Whiffles 377 Enoch Arden 354 Fruits of the Wine Cup 378 Under the Gas Light 355 Drunkard’s Warning 379 Daniel Rochat 356 Temperance Doctor 380 Caste 357 Aunt Dinah 381 School 358 Widow Freeheart 382 Home 359 Frou Frou 383 David Garrick 360 Long Strike 384 Ours VOL. XLVI. VOL. XLIX. 361 Larcers 385 Social Glass, 362 Lu> ille 386 Daniel Druce 363 Randall’s Thumb 387 Two Roses 364 Wicked World 388 Adrienne 365 Two Orphans 389 The Bells 366 Colleen Bawn 390 Uncle 367 ’Twixt Axe and Crown 391 Courtship 368 Lady Clancarthy 392 Not Such a Fool RENCH’S INTERNATIONAL COPYRIGHTED EDITION OF THE WORKS OF THE BEST AUTHORS. The following very successful plays have just been issued at 25 cents per copy. THE BALLOON. Farcical comedy in 8 Acts by J. H. Darni.ey and Manville Fenn. 6 male, 4 female PAIR OF SPECTACLES. Comedy in 3 Acts iy Svdnhy Grundy, author of “ Sowing the Wind,’ ic. 8 male, 3 female characters. FOOL’S PARADISE. An original play in 3 Wts by Sydney Grundy, author of “Sowing the Wind,” Ac. 5 male, 4 female characters. P E SILVER SHIELD. An original comedy in I Acts by Sydney Grundy, author of “Sowing the Wind,” Ac. 5 male, 3 female characters. HE GLASS OF FASHION. An original com- >dy in 4 Acts by Sydney Grundy, author of “Sowing ,he Wind,” Ac. 5 male. 5 female characters. characters. MISS CLEOPATRA. Farce in 3 Acts by Arthur Shirley. 7 male, 3 female characters. SIX PERSONS. Comedy Act by I. Zangwill. 1 male. 1 female character. FASHIONABLE INTELLIGENCE. Comedi¬ etta in 1 Act by Percy Fendall. 1 male, 1 female cha ,'acter. HIGHLAND LEGACY. Comedy in 1 Act by Brandon Thomas, author of “Charley’s Aunt.” 5 male, 2 female characters. Contents of Catalogue which is sent Free. nateur Drama nateur Operas tides Needed by Amateurs t of Scene Painting ker’s Reading Club ards, Whiskers, Mustaches, etc. und Sets of Plays ilwer Lytton’s Plays irlesque Dramas irnt Cork ibman’s Story irnivnl of Authors larade Plays illdren’s Plays >mic Dramas for Male Characters only istume Books ape Hair tmberiand Edition irkey Dramas ram as for Boys rawing-room Monologues ocution, Reciters and Speakers ;hvopian Dramas Evening’s Entertainment Fairy and Home Plays French’s Costumes French’s Editions French’s Italian Operas French’s Parlor Comedies French’s Standard and Minor Drama French’s Standard and Minor Drama, bound French’s Scenes for Amateurs Frobisher’s Popular Recitals Grand Army Dramas Guid j Books for Amateurs Guide to Selecting Plays Hints on Costumes Home Plays for Ladles Irish Plays Irving’s Plays Juvenile Plays Make-Up Book Make-Up Box Mock Trial Mrs. Jarley’s Wax Works New Plays New Recitation Books Nigger Jokes and Stump Speeches Parlor Magic Parlor Pantomimes Pieces of Pleasantry Poems for Recitations Plays for Mf.i- Characters only Round Games Scenery Scriptural and Historical Dramas Sensation Dramas Se'io-Comic Dramas Shadow Pantomimes Shakespeare’s Plays for Amateurs Shakespeare’s Plays Stanley’s Dwarfs Spirit Gum Tableaux Vivants Talma Actor’s Art Temperance Plays Vocal Music of Shakespeare’s Plays Webster’s Acting Edition Wigs, etc. VOL. XLT. Adventures of a Love I ost Child [Letter Court Cards Cox and Box Forte Winks Wonderful Woman Curious Case Tweedleton’s Tail Coat VOL. XLII. VOL. XLIII. 329 As Like as T wo Peas 337 Sunset 330 Presumptive Evidence 338 For Haifa Million 331 Happy Band 339 Cable Car 332 Pinafore 340 Early Bird 333 Mock Trial 34l Alumni Play 334 My Uncle’s Will 342 Show of Hands 335 Happy Pair 343 Barbara 336 My Turn Next 344 Who’s Who r.) VOL. XLIV. 345 Who’s To Win Him 346 Which i s Which 347 Cup of Tea 343 Sarah’s Young Man 349 Hearts 350 In Honor Bound [Law 351 Freezing a Mother-in- 352 My Lord in Livery I _ SAMUEL FRENCH, 28-30 West 38th Street, New York City. ggr Hew and Explicit Descriptive Catalogue Mailed Free on Request. I * * FRENCH’S STANDARD DRAMJ* Price 15 Cents each.—Bound Volumes $1.25. VOL. I. Ion Fazio The Lady oi Lyons Richelieu The Wife The Honeymoon The School for Scandal 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 oO 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 63 54 55 66 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 Money VOL. II. The Stranger Grandfather Whitehead Richard III Love’s Sacrifice The Gamester A Cure for the Heartach. The Hunchback Don Caesar de Kazan VOL. III. The Poor Gentleman Hamlet Charles II Venice Preserved Pizarro The Love Chase Othello Lend me Five Shillings VOL. IV. Virginius King of the Commons London Assurance The Rent Day Two Gentlemen ofVerona The Jealous Wife The Rivals Perfection VOL. V. [Debts A New Way to Pay Old Look Before You Leap King John Nervous Man Damon and Pythias Clandestine Marriage William Tell Day after the Wedding VOL. VI. Speed the Plough Romeo and Juliet Feudal Times Charles the Twelfth The Bride The Follies of a Night Iron Chest [Fair Lady Faint Heart Never Won VOL. VII. Road to Ruin Macbeth Temper Evadne Bertram The Duenna Much Ado About Nothing The i 'ritiei VOL. VIII. The Apostate Twelftn Night Brutus Simpson & Co Merchant of Venice Did Heads A Young Hearts Mountaineers [riage Three Weeks after Mar- VOL. IX. Love As You Like It The Elder Brother Werner Gisippus Town and Country King Lear Blue Devils VOL. X. Henry VIII Married and Single Henrv IV Paul Pry Guy Mannering Sweethearts and Wives Serious Family Sne Stoops to Conquer VOL. XI. 81 .Tulius Caisar 82 Vicar of Wakefield 83 Leap Year 84 The Catspaw 55 The Passing Cloud 86 Drunkard 87 Rob Roy 88 George Barnwell VOL. XII. 89 Ingomar 90 Skeiches in India 91 Two Friends 9^ Jane Shore 93 Corsican Brothers 54 Mind your own Business 95 Writing on the Wall 96 Heir at Law VOL. XIII. 97 Soldier’s Daughter 9 Douglas 99 Marco Spada 100 Natine’. Nobleman 101 Sardaua pal us 102 Civil'zation 103 The Robbers 104 Katharine and Petruchio VOL. XIV. 105 Game of Love 106 Midsummer Nlght ? s 107 Ernestine [Dream 108 Rag I’ieker of Paris 109 Flying Dutchman l ij Hypocrite 111 Tl’ierese 112 La Tour de Nesle VOL. XV. 113 Ireland As It Is 114 Sea of Ice 115 Seven Clerks 116 Game of Life 117 Forty Thieves 118 Bryan Boroihme 119 Romance and Reality 120 Ugolino t xvi. 121 The Tempest 122 The Pilot 123 Carpenter of Rouen 1 4 King’s Rival 125 Little Treasure 126 Dombev and Son 12" Parents and Guardians 128 Jewess VOL. XVII. 129 Camille 130 Married Life 131 Wen lock of Wenlock 132 Rose of Etirickvale 133 David Copperfield 134 Aline, or the Rose of 1 35 Pauline [Killarney 136 Jane Eyre vol. xviir. 137 Night and Morning 138 .-Ethiop 139 Three Guardsmen 140 Tom Cringle 141 Ilenriette, the Forsaken 142 Eustache Baudin !43 Ernest Malt ravers 144 Bold Dragoons VOL. XIX. 145 Dred, or the Dismal [Swamp 146 Last Day8 of Pompeii 147 Esmeralda 148 Peter Wilkins 149 Ben the Boatswain 150 Jonathan Bradford 151 Retribution 152 Minerali VOL. XX. 153 French Snv 154 V» ept of Wish-ton Wish 155 Evil Genius 156 Ben Bolt 157 Sailor of France 158 Red Mask 159 Life of an Actress 160 Wedding Day VOL. XXL 161 All’s Fair in Love 162 Ilofer 163 Self 164 Cinderella 166 Phantom 166 Franklin [Moscow 167 The Gunmaker of 168 The Love of a Priime VOL. XXII. 169 Son of the Night 170 Rory O’More 171 Golden Eagle '" , 2 Rienzi 173 Broke Sword 174 Rip Van Winkle 175 Isabelle 176 Heart of Mid Lothian VOL. XXI11. 177 Actress of Padua 178 floating Beacon 179 Bride ot Lammermoor 180 Cataract of the Ganges 181 Roll tier of the Rhine 182 School of Reform 183 Wandering Boys 184 Mazeppa VOL. XXIV. 185 Young New York 186 The Victims 187 Romance after Marriage 188 Brigand 189 Poor of New York 190 Ambrose Gwinett 191 Raymond and Agnes 192 Gambler’s Fate VOi- XXV. 193 Father and Son 194 M ssaniello 195 Sixteen String Jack 196 Youtlitul Queen 197 Skeleton Witness 198 Innkeeper of Akin ville 199 Miller and his Men 200 Aladdin VOL. XXVI. 201 Adrienne the Actress 202 Undine 203 Jesse Brown 204 Asinodeus 205 Mormons 206 Blanche of Brandywine 207 Viola 208 Deseret Deserted VOL. XXVII. 209 Americans in Paris 210 Victorine 211 Wizard of the Wave 212 Castle Spectre 213 Horse-shoe Robinson 21. Armand, Mrs. Mowatt 21 Fashion, Mrs. Mowatt 216 Glance at New York VOL. XXV1I1. 217 Inconstant 218 Uncle Toni’s Cabin 219 Guide to the Stage 220 Veteran 221 Miller of New Jersey 222 Dark Hour before Dawn 223 Midsum’rNiglit’sDream [Laura Keene’s Edition 224 Art and Artifice VOL. XXIX. 225 Poor Young Man 226 Ossawattomie Brown 227 Pope of Rome 228 Oliver Twist 299 Pauvrette 230 Man in the Iron Mask 231 Knight of Arva 232 Moll Pitcher VOL. XXX. 233 Black Eyed Susan 2"4 Satan in' Paris 235 Roslna Meadows [ess 236 West End, or Irish Heir- 237 Six Degrees of Crime 238 The Lady and the Devil 239 Avemrer, or Moor of Sici- VOT,. XXXI. 241 Merry Wives of W 242 Mary’s Birthday 243 Shandy Maguire 244 Wilil Oats 245 Michael Erie £46 Idiot Witness 247 Willow Copse 248 People's Lawyer VC! XXXII. 249 The Boy Martyrs 250 I.ucretia Borgia 251 Surgeon of Paris 252 Patrician’s Daught 253 Shoemaker of Toul 254 Momentous Questii 255 Love and Loyalty 256 Robber’s Wife VOL. XXXIII. 257 Dumb Girl of Gene 2 8 Wreck Ashore 259 (lari 260 Rural Felicity £61 Wallace 262 Madelaine 263 The Fireman 2t4 Grist to the Mill VOL. XXXIV. 265 Two Loves and a I 266 A nnie Blake 267 Steward 268 Captain Kyd 269 Nick of the Woods 270 Marble Heart 271 Second Love 272 Dream at Sea VuL. XXXV. 273 Breach of Promise 274 Review 275 Lady of the Lake 276 Still Water Runs 1 277 The Scholar 278 Helping Hands 279 Kaust and Marguer 280 Last Man VOL. XXXYI. 281 Belle’s Stratagem 282 Old and Young 283 Raffaella 284 Ruth Oakley 285 British Sir ce 2e6 A Life 8 Ransom 287 Giralda 28 Time Tries All VOL. XXXVII. 289 Ella Rosenl-urg 29n Warlock of the Gle 291 Zelina 292 Beatrice 2*3 Neighbor Jackwoot 294 Wonder £95 Robert Emmet 296 Green Bushes VOL. XXXVTT7. 297 Flowers oi the Fore 298 A Bachelor of Arts 299 The Midnight Bant 300 Husband of m Hou 301 Love’s Labor Lost 302 Naiad Queen 303 Caprice 304 Cradle of Liberty VOL. XXXIX. 305 The Lost Ship 806 Country Squire 307 Fraud and its Victi' 308 Putnam 309 King and Deserter 310 La F anunina 311 A Hard Struggle 312 Gwinnette Vaughai VOL XL. 313 The Love Knot [. ] 314 Lavater, or Not a, 315 The Noble Heart 316 Coriolantis 317 The Winter’s Tale 318 Eveleen Wilson 319 Ivanhoe 240 Masks and Faces [ly|320 Jonathan in Engla; (French' s Standard Drama Continued on id page of Cover.) SAMUEL FRENCH, 28-30 West 38th Street, New York City. New and Explicit Descriptive Catalogue Mailed Free on Request