WBW&M ■ ■ ■mil mwrMiti i iH i im ROBERT BROWNING AND ELIZABETH BARRETT BARRETT Volume I. Digitized by the Internet Archive in 2012 with funding from University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill http://archive.org/details/lettersofrobertb01brow Publish '. THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING AND ELIZABETH BARRETT BARRETT 1845-1846 WITH PORTRAITS AND FACSIMILES IN TWO VOLUMES Vol. I. ) . HARPER & BROTHERS, PUBLISHERS NEW YORK AND LONDON Copyright, 1898, by Harper & Brothers. All right! reitrvid. NOTE In considering the question of publishing these letters, which are all that ever passed between my father and mother, for after their marriage they were never separated, it seemed to me that my only alternatives were to allow them to be published or to destroy them. I might, indeed, have left the matter to the de- cision of others after my death, but that would be evading a re- sponsibility which I feel that I ought to accept. Ever since my mother's death these letters were kept by my father in a certain inlaid box, into which they exactly fitted, and where they have always rested, letter beside letter, each in its con- secutive order and numbered on the envelope by his own hand. My father destroyed all the rest of his correspondence, and not long before his death he said, referring to these letters : ' There they are, do with them as you please when I am dead and gone !' A few of the letters are of little or no interest, but their omis- sion would have saved only a few pages, and I think it well that the correspondence should be given in its entirety. I wish to express my gratitude to my father's friend and mine, Mrs. Miller Morison, for her unfailing sympathy and assistance in deciphering some words which had become scarcely legible owing to faded ink. R. B. B. 1898. 536630 ■ o ADVEKTISEMENT The correspondence contained in these volumes is printed exactly as it appears in the original letters, without alteration, except in respect of obvious slips of the pen. Even the punctuation, with its characteristic dots and dashes, has for the most part been preserved. The notes in square brackets [ ] have been added mainly in order to translate the Greek phrases, and to give the references to Greek- poets. For these thanks are due to Mr. F. G. Kenyon, who has revised the proofs with the assistance of Mr. Roger Ingpen / the latter being responsible for the index. ILLUSTRATIONS PORTRAIT OF ROBERT BROWNING Frontispiece After the picture by Gordigiani FACSIMILE OF LETTER OF ROBERT BROWNING . . To face p. 572 THE LETTEES OF ROBERT BROWNING AND ELIZABETH BARRETT BARRETT B. B. to E. B. B. New Cross, Hatcham, Surrey. [Post -mark, January 10, 1845.] I love your verses with all my heart, dear Miss Barrett, ^and this is no off-hand complimentary letter that I shall write, — whatever else, no prompt matter-of-course recogni- tion of your genius, and there a graceful and natural end of the thing. Since the day last week when I first read your poems, I quite laugh to remember how I have been turning and turning again in my mind what I should be able to tell you of their effect upon me, for in the first flush of delight I thought I would this once get out of my habit of purely passive enjoyment, when I do really enjoy, and thoroughly justify my admiration — perhaps even, as a loyal fellow-craftsman should, try and find fault and do you some little good to be proud of hereafter ! — but nothing comes of it all — so into me has it gone, and part of me has it be- come, this great living poetry of yours, not a flower of which but took root and grew — Oh, how different that is from lying to be dried and pressed flat, and prized highly, and put in a book with a proper account at top and bot- tom, and shut up and put away . . . and the book called a ' Flora, ' besides ! After all, I need not give up the thought of doing that, too, in time; because even now, Vol. I.— 1 2 THE LETTERS OE ROBERT BROWNING [Jan. 10 talking with whoever is worthy, I can give a reason for my faith in one and another excellence, the fresh strange music, the affluent language, the exquisite pathos and true new brave thought; but in this addressing myself to you — your own self, and for the first time, my feeling rises altogether. I do, as I say, love these books with all my heart — and I love you too. Do you know I was once not very far from seeing — really seeing you? Mr. Kenyon said to me one morning ' Would you like to see Miss Barrett? ' then he went to announce me, — then he returned . . you were too unwell, and now it is years ago, and I feel as at some un- toward passage in my travels, as if I had been close, so close, to some world' s-wonder in chapel or crypt, only a screen to push and I might have entered, but there was some slight, so it now seems, slight and just sufficient bar to admission, and the half-opened door shut, and I went home my thousands of miles, and the sight was never to be? Well, these Poems were to be, and this true thankful joy and pride with which I feel myself, Yours ever faithfully, Robert Browning. Miss Barrett, • * 50 Wimpole St. R. Browning. E. B. B. to R. B. 50 Wimpole Street: Jan. 11, 1845. I thank you, dear Mr. Browning, from the bottom of my heart. You meant to give me pleasure by your letter — and even if the object had not been answered, I ought still to thank you. But it is thoroughly answered. Such a letter from such a hand ! Sympathy is dear — very dear to me : but the sympathy of a poet, and of such a poet, is the 1 [With this and the following letter the addresses on the envelopes are given ; for all subsequent letters the addresses are the same. The correspondence passed through the post.] 1845] AND ELIZABETH BAEEETT 3 quintessence of sympathy to me ! Will you take back my gratitude for it? — agreeing, too, that of all the commerce done in the world, from Tyre to Carthage, the exchange of sympathy for gratitude is the most princely thing ! For the rest you draw me on with your kindness. It is difficult to get rid of people when you once have given them too much pleasure — that is a fact, and we will not stop for the moral of it. What I was going to say- — after a little natural hesitation — is, that if ever you emerge without in- convenient effort from your 'passive state,' and will tell me of such faults as rise to the surface and strike you as im- portant in my poems, (for of course, I do not think of troubling you with criticism in detail) you will confer a lasting obligation on me, and one which I shall value so much, that I covet it at a distance. I do not pretend to any extraordinary meekness under criticism and it is pos- sible enough that I might not be altogether obedient to yours. But with my high respect for your power in your Art and for your experience as an artist, it would be quite impossible for me to hear a general observation of yours on what appear to you my master-faults, without being the better for it hereafter in some way. I ask for only a sentence or two of general observation — and I do not ask even for that, so as to tease you — but in the humble, low voice, which is so excellent a thing in women — particularly when they go a-begging ! The most frequent general criti- cism I receive, is, I think, upon the style, ' if I would but change my style ' ! But that is an objection (isn't it?) to the writer bodily? Buff on says, and every sincere writer must feel, that 'Le style c'est Vhommef a fact, however, scarcely calculated to lessen the objection with certain critics. Is it indeed true that I was so near to the pleasure and honour of making your acquaintance? and can it be true that you look back upon the lost opportunity with any regret? But — you know — if you had entered the 'crypt,' you might have caught cold, or been tired to death, and 4 THE LETTEES OF ROBERT BROWNING [Jan. n wished yourself c a thousand miles off;' which would have been worse than travelling them. It is not my interest, however, to put such thoughts in your head about its being 'all for the best;' and I would rather hope (as I do) that what I lost by one chance I may recover by some future one. Winters shut me up as they do dormouse's eyes; in the spring, toe shall see : and I am so much better that I seem turning round to the outward world again. And in the meantime I have learnt to know your voice, not merely from the poetry but from the kindness in it. Mr. Kenyon often speaks of you — dear Mr. Kenyon! — who most un- speakably, or only speakably with tears in my eyes, — has been my friend and helper, and my book's friend and helper ! critic and sympathiser, true friend of all hours ! You know him well enough, I think, to understand that I must be grateful to him. I am writing too much, — and notwithstanding that I am writing too much, I will write of one thing more. I will say that I am your debtor, not only for this cordial letter and for all the pleasure which came with it, but in other ways, and those the highest : and . I will say that while I live to follow this divine art of poetry, in proportion to my love for it and my devotion to it, I must be a devout ad- mirer and student of your works. This is in my heart to say to you — and I say it. And, for the rest, I am proud to remain Your obliged and faithful Elizabeth B. Barrett. Robert Browning, Esq. New Cross, Hatcham, Surrey. R. B. to E. B. B. New Cross, Hatcham, Surrey. Jan. 13, 1845. Dear Miss Barrett, — I just shall say, in as few words as I can, that you make me very happy, and that, now the beginning is over, I dare say I shall do better, because 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 5 my poor praise, number one, was nearly as felicitously brought out, as a certain tribute to no less a personage than Tasso, which I was amused with at Eome some weeks ago, in a neat pencilling on the plaister-wall by his tomb at Sant' Onofrio — 'Alia cara memoria — di — (please fancy solemn interspaces and grave capital letters at the new lines) di — Torquato Tasso — il Dottore Bernardini— offriva — il seguente Carme — tu ' — and no more, the good man, it should seem, breaking down with the overload of love here ! But my ' O tu ' — was breathed out most sincerely, and now you have taken it in gracious part, the rest will come after. Only, — and which is why I write now — it looks as if I have introduced some phrase or other about ' your faults ' so cleverly as to give exactly the opposite meaning to what I meant, which was, that in my first ardour I had thought to tell you of everything which impressed me in your verses, down, even, to whatever ' faults ' I could find— a good ear- nest, when I had got to them, that I had left out not much between — as if some Mr. Fellows were to say, in the over- flow of his first enthusiasm of rewarded adventure : ' I will describe you all the outer life and ways of these Lycians, down to their very sandal -thongs,' whereto the be-corre- sponded one rejoins — ' Shall I get next week, then, your dissertation on sandal-thongs ' ? Yes, and a little about the ' Olympian Horses, ' and God-charioteers as well ! What ' struck me as faults ', were not matters on the re- moval of which, one was to have — poetry, or high poetry, — but the very highest poetry, so I thought, and that, to universal recognition. For myself, or any artist, in many of the cases there would be a positive loss of time, peculiar artist's pleasure — for an instructed eye loves to see where the brush has dipped twice in a lustrous colour, has lain insistingly along a favourite outline, dwelt lovingly in a grand shadow; for these ' too muches ' for the everybody's picture are so many helps to the making out the real painter's picture as he had it in his brain. And all of the Titian's Naples Magdalen must have once been golden in 6 THE LETTERS OE ROBERT BROWNING [Jan. 13 its degree to justify that lieap of hair in her hands — the only gold effected now ! But about this soon — for night is drawing on and I go out, yet cannot, quiet at conscience, till I repeat (to myself, for I never said it to you, I think) that y our poetry must be, cannot but be, infinitely more to me than mine to you ■ — for you do what I always wanted, hoped to do, and only seem now likely to do for the first time. You speak out, you, — I only make men and women speak — give you truth broken into prismatic hues, and fear the pure white light, even if it is in me, but I am going to try ; so it will be no small comfort to have your company just now, seeing that when you have your men and women aforesaid, you are busied with them, whereas it seems bleak, melancholy work, this talking to the wind (for I have begun) — yet I don't think I shall let you hear, after all, the savage things about Popes and imaginative religions that I must say. See how I go on and on to you, I who, whenever now and then pulled, by the head and hair, into letter-writing, get sorrowfully on for a line or two, as the cognate creature urged on by stick and string, and then come down ' flop ' upon the sweet haven of page one, line last, as serene as the sleep of the virtuous ! You will never more, I hope, talk of ' the honour of my acquaintance, ' but I will joyfully wait for the delight of your friendship, and the spring, and my Chapel-sight after all ! Ever yours most faithfulty, K. Browning. For Mr. Kenyon — I have a convenient theory about him, and his otherwise quite unaccountable kindness to me ; but 'tis quite night now, and they call me. E. B. B. to R. B. 50 Wimpole Street: Jan. 15, 1845. Dear Mr. Browning, — The fault was clearly with me and not with you. 1845] AND ELIZABETH BABRETT 7 When I had an Italian master, years ago, he told me that there was an unpronounceable English word which abso- lutely expressed me, and which he would say in his own tongue, as he could not in mine — 'testa lunga.' Of course, the signor meant headlong ! — and now I have had enough to tame me, and might be expected to stand still in my stall. But you see I do not. Headlong I was at first, and head- long I continue — precipitously rushing forward through all manner of nettles and briars instead of keeping the path ; guessing at the meaning of unknown words instead of looking into the dictionary — tearing open letters, and never untying a string, — and expecting everything to be done in a minute, and the thunder to be as quick as the lightning. And so, at your half word I flew at the whole one, with all its possible consequences, and wrote what you read. Our common friend, as I think he is, Mr. Home, is often forced to entreat me into patience and cool- ness of purpose, though his only intercourse with me has been by letter. And, by the way, you will be sorry to hear that during his stay in Germany he has been ' head- long ' (out of a metaphor) twice ; once, in falling from the Drachenfels, when he only just saved himself by catching at a vine ; and once quite lately, at Christmas, in a fall on the ice of the Elbe in skating, when he dislocated his left shoulder in a very painful manner. He is doing quite well, I believe, but it was sad to have such a shadow from the German Christmas tree, and he a stranger. In art, however, I understand that it does not do to be headlong, but patient and laborious — and there is a love strong enough, even in me, to overcome nature. I appre- hend what you mean in the criticism you just intimate, and shall turn it over and over in my mind until I get practical good from it. What no mere critic sees, but what you, an artist, know, is the difference between the thing desired and the thing attained, between the idea in the writer's mind and the etdmXov cast off in his work. All the effort — the quick 'ning of the breath and beating of the heart in 8 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [Jan. 15 pursuit, which is ruffling and injurious to the general effect of a composition ; all which you call 'insistency,' and which many would call superfluity, and which is superfluous in a sense— you can pardon, because you un- derstand. The great chasm between the thing I say, and the thing I would say, would be quite dispiriting to me, in spite even of such kindnesses as yours, if the desire did not master the despondency. ' Oh for a horse with wings ! ' It is wrong of me to write so of myself — only you put your finger on the root of a fault, which has, to my fancy, been a little misapprehended. I do not say everything I think (as has been said of me by master-critics) but I take every means to say what 1 think, which is different ! — -or 1 fancy so ! In one thing, however, you are wrong. Why should you deny the full measure of my delight and benefit from your writings? I could tell you why you should not. You have in your vision two worlds, or to use the language of the schools of the day, you are both subjective and ob- jective in the habits of your mind. You can deal both with abstract thought and with human passion in the most pas- sionate sense. Thus, you have an immense grasp in Art; and no one at all accustomed to consider the usual forms of it, could help regarding with reverence and gladness the gradual expansion of your powers. Then you are ■ mascu- line ' to the height — and I, as a woman, have studied some of your gestures of language and intonation wistfully, as a thing beyond me far ! and the more admirable for being beyond. Of your new work I hear with delight. How good of you to tell me. And it is not dramatic in the strict sense, I am to understand — (am I right in understanding so?) and you speak, in your own person ' to the winds ' ? no — but to the thousand living sympathies which will awake to hear you. A great dramatic power may develope itself other- wise than in the formal drama ; and I have been guilty of wishing, before this hour (for reasons which I will not thrust upon you after all my tedious writing), that you 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 9 would give the public a poem' unassociated directly or in- directly with the stage, for a trial on the popular heart. I reverence the drama, but — But I break in on myself out of consideration for you. I might have done it, you will think, before. I vex your ' se- rene sleep of the virtuous ' like a nightmare. Do not say " No. ' I am sure I do ! As to the vain parlance of the world, I did not talk of the ' honour of your acquaintance ' without a true sense of honour, indeed ; but I shall willingly exchange it all (and now, if you please, at this moment, for fear of worldly mutabilities) for the 4 delight of your friendship.' Believe me, therefore, dear Mr. Browning, Faithfully yours, and gratefully, Elizabeth B. Baeeett. For Mr. Kenyon's kindness, as 1 see it, no theory will account. I class it with mesmerism for that reason. B. B. to E. B. B. New Cross, Hatcham, Monday night. [Post-mark, January 28, 1845. J Dear Miss Barrett, — Your books lie on my table here, at arm's length from me, in this old room where I sit all day : and when my head aches or wanders or strikes work, as it now or then will, I take my chance for either green-covered volume, as if it were so much fresh trefoil to feel in one's hands this winter- time, — and round I turn, and, putting a decisive elbow on three or four half-done-with ' Bells ' of mine, read, read, read, and just as I have shut up the book and walked to the window, I recollect that you wanted me to find faults there, and that, in an unwise hour, I engaged to do so. Meantime, the days go by (the whitethroat is come and sings now) and as I would not have you c look down on me from your white heights ' as promise breaker, evader, or forgetter, if I could help : and as, if I am very candid and contrite, you may find it in your heart to write to me 10 THE LETTEKS OE EOBEET BBOWNING [Jan. 28 again — who knows? — I shall say at once that the said faults cannot be lost, must be somewhere, and shall be faith- fully brought you back whenever they turn up,— as people tell one of missing matters. I am rather exacting, myself, with my own gentle audience, and get to say spiteful things about them when they are backward in their dues of appreciation — but really, really — could I be quite sure that anybody as good as — I must go on, I suppose, and say — as myself, even, were honestly to feel towards me as I do, towards the writer of ' Bertha, ' and the ' Drama, ' and the ' Duchess, ' and the ' Page ' and — the whole two vol- umes, I should be paid after a fashion, I know. One thing I can do— pencil, if you like, and annotate, and dissertate upon that I love most and least — I think I can do it, that is. Here an odd memory comes — of a friend who, — volun- teering such a service to a sonnet-writing somebody, gave him a taste of his quality in a side-column of short criti- cisms on sonnet the First, and starting off the beginning three lines with, of course, ' bad, worse, worst ' — made by a generous mintage of words to meet the sudden run of his epithets, ' worser, worserer, worserest ' pay off the second terzet in full — no ' badder, badderer, badderest ' fell to the Second's allowance, and 'worser' &c. answered the demands of the Third ; ' worster, worsterer, worsterest ' supplied the emergency of the Fourth ; and, bestowing his last ' worser- estest and worstestest ' on lines 13 and 14, my friend (slap- ping his forehead like an emptied strong-box) frankly de- clared himself bankrupt, and honourably incompetent, to satisfy the reasonable expectations of the rest of the series. What an illustration of the law by which opposite ideas suggest opposite, and contrary images come together ! See now, how, of that ' Friendship ' you offer me (and here Juliet's word rises to my lips) — I feel sure once and for ever. I have got already, I see, into this little pet- handwriting of mine (not anyone else's) which scratches on as if theatrical copyists (ah me !) and Bradbury and Evans' 1845] AND ELIZABETH BABRETT 11 Eeader were not! But you shall get something better than this nonsense one day, if you will have patience with me — hardly better, though, because this does me real good, gives real relief, to write. After all, you know nothing, next to nothing of me, and that stops me. Spring is to come, however! If you hate writing to me as I hate writing to nearly everybody, I pray you never write — if you do, as you say, care for anything I have done. I will simply assure you, that meaning to begin work in deep earnest, begin without affectation, God knows- — I do not know what will help me more than hearing from you, — and therefore, if you do not so very much hate it, I know I shall hear from you — and very little more about your ' tiring me. ' Ever yours faithfully, Bobert Browning. K B. B. to B. B. 50 Walpole Street : Feb. 3, 1845. Why how could I hate to write to you, dear Mr. Brown- ing? Could you believe in such a thing? If nobody likes writing to everybody (except such professional letter writers as you and I are not), yet everybody likes writing to some- body, and it would be strange and contradictory if I were not always delighted both to hear from you and to write to you, this talking upon paper being as good a social pleasure as another, when our means are somewhat straitened. As for me, I have done most of my talking by post of late years — as people shut up in dungeons take up with scrawl- ing mottoes on the walls. Not that I write to many in the way of regular correspondence, as our friend Mr. Home predicates of me in his romances (which is mere romanc- ing !), but that there are a few who will write and be writ- ten to by me without a sense of injury. Dear Miss Mit- ford, for instance. You do not know her, I think, personally, although she was the first to tell me (when I was very ill 12 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [Feb. 3 and insensible to all the glories of the world except poetry) of the grand scene in ' Pippa Passes.' She has filled a large drawer in this room with delightful letters, heart- warm and soul-warm, . . drifting3 of nature (if sunshine could drift like snow) , and which, if they should ever fall the way of all writiug, into print, would assume the folio shape as a matter of course, and take rank on the lowest shelf of libraries, with Benedictine editions of the Fathers, /..r.X. I write this to you to show how I can have pleas- ure in letters, and never think them too long, nor too fre- quent, nor too illegible from being written in little ' pet hands.' I can read any MS. except the writing on the pyramids. And if you will only promise to treat me en bon camarade, without reference to the conventionalities of 'ladies and gentlemen, ' taking no thought for your sen- tences (nor for mine), nor for your blots (nor for mine), nor for your blunt speaking (nor for mine), nor for your badd speling (nor for mine), and if you agree to send me a blotted thought whenever you are in the mind for it, and with as little ceremony and less legibility than you would think it necessary to employ towards your printer — why, then, I am ready to sign and seal the contract, and to rejoice in being ' articled' as your correspondent. Only don't let us have any constraint, any ceremony! Don't be civil to me when you feel rude, — nor loquacious when you incline to silence, — nor yielding in the manners when you are perverse in the mind. See how out of the world I am ! Suffer me to profit by it in almost the only profitable cir- cumstance, and let us rest from the bowing and the courte- sy ing, you and I, on each side. You will find me an honest man on the whole, if rather hasty and prejudging, which is a different thing from prejudice at the worst. And we have great sympathies in common, and I am inclined to look up to you in many things, and to learn as much of every- thing as you will teach me. On the other hand you must pre- pare yourself to forbear and to forgive — will you? While I throw off the ceremony, I hold the faster to the kindness. 1845] • AND ELIZABETH BABBETT. 13 Is it true, as you say, that J c know so "little" ' of you? And is it true, as others say, that the productions of an artist do not partake of his real nature, . . that in the minor sense, man is not made in the image of God? It is not true, to my mind— and therefore it is not true that I know little of you, except in as far as it is true (which I believe) that your greatest works are to come. Need I assure you that I shall always hear with the deepest interest every word you will say to me of what you are doing or about to do? I hear of the ' old room ' and the ' " Bells" lying about, ' with an interest which you may guess at, perhaps. And when you tell me besides, of my poems being there, and of your caring for them so much beyond the tide-mark of my hopes, the pleasure rounds itself into a charm, and prevents its own expression. Overjoyed I am with this cordial sympathy — but it is better, I feel, to try to justify it by future work than to thank you for it now. I think — if I may dare to name myself with you in the poetic relation — that we both have high views of the Art we follow, and stedfast purpose in the pursuit of it, and that we should not, either of us, be likely to be thrown from the course, by the casting of any Atalanta-ball of speedy popularity. But I do not know, I cannot guess, whether you are liable to be pained deeply by hard criti- cism and cold neglect, such as original writers like your- self are too often exposed to — or whether the love of Art is enough for you, and the exercise of Art the filling joy of your life. Not that praise must not always, of necessity, be delightful to the artist, but that it may be redundant to his content. Do you think so? or not? It appears to me that poets who, like Keats, are highly susceptible to criti- cism, must be jealous, in their own persons, of the future honour of their works. Because, if a work is worthy, honour must follow it, though the worker should not live to see that following overtaking. Now, is it not enough that the work be honoured — enough I mean, for the worker? And is it not enough to keep down a poet's ordinary wearing 14 THE LETTEES OF ROBERT BROWNING [Feb. 3 anxieties, to think, that if his work be worthy it will have honour, and, if not, that ' Sparta must have nobler sons than he ' ? I am writing nothing applicable, I see, to anything in question, but when one falls into a favourite train of thought, one indulges oneself in thinking on. I began in thinking and wondering what sort of artistic constitution you had, being determined, as you may observe (with a sarcastic smile at the impertinence), to set about knowing as much as possible of you immediately. Then you spoke of your ' gentle audience ' (you began), and I, who know that you have not one but many enthusiastic admirers, the ' fit and few ' in the intense meaning, yet not the diffused fame which will come to you presently, wrote on, down the margin of the subject, till I parted from it altogether. But, after all, we are on the proper matter of sympathy. And after all, and after all that has been said and mused upon the 'natural ills,' the anxiety, and wearing out ex- perienced by the true artist, — is not the good immeasurably, greater than the evil? It it not great good, and great joy? For my part, I wonder sometimes — I surprise myself won- dering — how without such an object and purpose of life, people find it worth while to live at all. . And, for happi- ness — why, my only idea of happiness, as far as my per- sonal enjoyment is concerned, (but I have been straight- ened in some respects and in comparison with the majority of livers !) lies deep in poetry and its associations. And then, the escape from pangs of heart and bodily weakness — when you throw off yourself — what you feel to be your- self — into another atmosphere and into other relations, where your life may spread its wings out new, and gather on every separate plume a brightness from the sun of the sun ! Is it possible that imaginative writers should be so fond of depreciating and lamenting over their own destiny ? Possible, certainly — but reasonable, not at all — and grate- ful, less than anything ! My faults, my faults — Shall I help you? Ah — you see them too well, I fear. And do you know that 1 also have 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT. 15 something of your feeling about ' being about to begin,' or I should dare to praise you for having it. But in you, it is different — it is, in you, a virtue. When Prometheus had recounted a long list of sorrows to be endured by Io, and declared at last that he was fiydiitat lv npooi/jitoi?, 1 poor Io burst out crying. And when the author of ' Paracelsus ' and the ' Bells and Pomegranates ' says that he is only ' go- ing to begin ' we may well (to take ' the opposite idea, ' as you write) rejoice and clap our hands. Yet I believe that, whatever you may have done, you will do what is greater. It is my faith for you.. And how I should like to know what poets have been your sponsors, c to promise and vow ' for you, — and whether you have held true to early tastes, or leapt violently from them, and what books you read, and what hours you write in. How curious I could prove myself ! — (if it isn't proved already) . But this is too much indeed, past all bearing, I suspect. Well, but if I ever write to you again — I mean, if you wish it — it may be in the other extreme of shortness. So do not take me for a born heroine of Richardson, or think that I sin always to this length, else, — you might indeed repent your quotation from Juliet — which I guessed at once — and of course — I have no joy in this contract to-day! It is too unadvised, too rash and sudden. Ever faithfully yours, Elizabeth B. Baebett. B. B. to K B. B. Hatcham, Tuesday. [Post-mark, February 11, 1845.] Dear Miss Barrett, — People would hardly ever tell false- hoods about a matter, if they had been let tell truth in the beginning, for it is hard to prophane one's very self, and 1 ' Not yet reached the prelude ' ( Aesch. Prom. 741) 16 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [Feb. 11 nobody who has, for instance, used certain words and ways to a mother or a father could, even if by the devil's help he loould, reproduce or mimic them with any effect to any- body else that was to be won over — and so, if • I love you ' were always outspoken when it might be, there would, I suppose, be no fear of its desecration at any after time. But lo ! only last night, I had to write, on the part of Mr. Carlyle, to a certain ungainly, foolish gentleman who keeps back from him, with all the fussy impotence of stupidity (not bad feeling, alas ! for that we could deal with) a cer- tain MS. letter of Cromwell's which completes the collec- tion now going to press ; and this long-ears had to be c dear Sir'd and obedient servanted ' till I said (to use a mild word) ' commend me to the sincerities of this kind of thing.' ! When I spoke of you knowing little of me, one of the senses in which I meant so was this — that I would not well vowel-point my common-place letters and syllables with a masoretic other sound and sense, make my ' dear ' something intenser than ' dears ' in ordinary, and ' yours ever ' a thought more significant than the run of its like. And all this came of your talking of ' tiring me, ' ' being too envious,' &c. &c, which I should never have heard of had the plain truth looked out of my letter with its unmistak- able eyes. Now, what you say of the ' bowing,' and con- vention that is to be, and tant def aeons that are not to be, helps me once and for ever— for have I not a right to say simply that, for reasons I know, for other reasons I don't exactly know, but might if I chose to think a little, and for still other reasons, which, most likely, all the choosing and thinking in the world would not make me know, I had rather hear from you than see anybody else. Never you care, dear noble Carlyle, nor you, my own friend Alfred over the sea, nor a troop of true lovers ! — Are not their fates written? there! Don't you answer this, please, but, mind it is on record, and now then, with a lighter con- science I shall begin replying to your questions. But then — what I have printed gives vo knowledge of me — it 1845] AND ELIZABETH BABKETT 17 evidences abilities of various kinds, if you will — and a dra- matic sympathy with certain modifications of passion . . . that I think — But I never have begun, even, what I hope I was born to begin and end — ■' ft. B. a poem ' — and next, if I speak (and, God knows, feel) as if what you have read were sadly imperfect demonstrations of even mere ability, it is from no absurd vanity, though it might seem so — these scenes and song-scraps are such mere and very escapes of my inner power, which lives in me like the light in those crazy Mediterranean phares I have watched at sea, where- in the light is ever revolving in a dark gallery, bright and alive, and only after a weary interval leaps out, for a mo- ment, from the one narrow chink, and then goes on with the blind wall between it and you; and, no doubt, then, precisely, does the poor drudge that carries the cresset set himself most busily to trim the wick — for don't think I want to say I have not worked hard — (this head of mine knows better) — but the work has been inside, and not when at stated times I held up my light to you — and, that there is no self-delusion here, I would prove to you (and nobody else) , even by opening this desk I write on, and showing what stuff, in the way of wood, I could make a great bon- fire with, if I might only knock the whole clumsy top off my tower ! Of course, every writing body says the same, so I gain nothing by the avowal ; but when I remember how I have done what was published, and half done what may never be, I say with some right, you can know but little of me. Still, I hope sometimes, though phrenolo- gists will have it that I cannot, and am doing better with this darling ' Luria ' — so safe in my head, and a tiny slip of paper I cover with my thumb ! Then you inquire about my c sensitiveness to criticism, ' and I shall be glad to tell you exactly, because I have, more than once, taken a course you might else not under- stand. I shall live always — that is for me — I am living here this 1845, that is for London. I write from a thorough conviction that it is the duty of me, and with the belief Vol. I.— 2 18 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [Feb. 11 that, after every drawback and shortcoming, I do my best, all things considered— that is for me, and, so being, the not being listened to by one human creature would, I hope, in nowise affect me. But of course I must, if for merely scientific purposes, know all about this 1845, its ways and doings, and something I do know, as that for a dozen cab- bages, if I pleased to grow them in the garden here, I might demand, say, a dozen pence at Covent Garden Mar- ket, — and that for a dozen scenes, of the average goodness, I may challenge as many plaudits at the theatre close by ; and a dozen pages of verse, brought to the Rialto where verse-merchants most do congregate, ought to bring me a fair proportion of the Eeviewers' gold currency, seeing the other traders pouch their winnings, as I do see. Well, when they won't pay me for my cabbages, nor praise me for my poems, I may, if I please, say ' more's the shame,' and bid both parties ' decamp to the crows, ' in Greek phrase, and yet go very lighthearted back to a garden-full of rose-trees, and a soul-full of comforts. If they had bought my greens I should have been able to buy the last number of Punch, and go through the toll-gate of Waterloo Bridge, and give the blind clarionet-player a trifle, and all without changing my gold. If they had taken to my books, my father and mother would have been proud of this and the other ' favourable critique, ' and — at least so folks hold — I should have to pay Mr. Moxon less by a few pounds, whereas — but you see ! Indeed, I force myself to say ever and anon, in the interest of the market- gardeners regular, and Keatses proper, 'It's nothing to you, critics, hucksters, all of you, if I have this garden and this conscience — I might go die at Rome, or take to gin and the newspaper, for what you would care ! ' So I don't quite lay open my resources to everybody. But it does so happen, that I have met with much more than I could have expected in this matter of kindly and prompt recog- nition. I never wanted a real set of good hearty praisers — and no bad reviewers — I am quite content with my 1845] AND ELIZABETH BABRETT 19 share. No — what I laughed at in my ' gentle audience ' is a sad trick the real admirers have of admiring at the wrong place — enough to make an apostle swear. That does make me savage — never the other kind of people; why, think now — take your own ' Drama of Exile ' and let me send it to the first twenty men and women that shall knock at your door to-day and after — of whom the first five are the Post- man, the seller of cheap sealing-wax, Mr. Hawkins Junr, the Butcher for orders, and the Tax gatherer — will you let me, by Cornelius Agrippa's assistance, force these five and these fellows to read, and report on, this ' Drama '■ — and, when I have put these faithful reports into fair English, do you believe they would be better than, if as good, as, the general run of Periodical criticisms? Not they, I will ven- ture to affirm. But then — once again, I get these people together and give them your book, and persuade them, moreover, that by praising it, the Postman will be helping its author to divide Long Acre into two beats, one of which she will take with half the salary and all the red collar, — that a sealing-wax vendor will see red wafers brought into vogue, and so on with the rest— and won't you just wish for your Spectators and Observers and Newcastle- upon-Tyne — Hebdomadal Mercuries back again! You see the inference — I do sincerely esteem it a perfectly provi- dential and miraculous thing that they are so well-behaved in ordinary, these critics ; and for Keats and Tennyson to ' go softly all their days ' for a gruff word or two is quite inexplicable to me, and always has been. Tennyson reads the Quarterly and does as they bid him, with the most sol- emn face in the world — out goes this, in goes that, all is changed and ranged. Oh me ! Out comes the sun, in comes the Times and eleven strikes (it does) already, and I have to go to Town, and I have no alternative but that this story of the Critic and Poet, ' the Bear and the Fiddle, ' should ' begin but break off in the middle ;' yet I doubt — nor will you henceforth, I know, say, ' I vex you, I am sure, by this lengthy writing.' Mind 20 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [Feb. it that spring is coming, for all this snow ; and know me for yours ever faithfully, K. Browning. I don't dare — yet I will — ask can you read this? Be- cause I could write a little better, but not so fast. Do you keep writing just as you do now 1 E. B. B. to B. B. 50 Wimpole Street, February 17, 1845. Dear Mr. Browning, — To begin with the end (which is only characteristic of the perverse like myself), I assure you I read your handwriting as currently as I could read the clearest type from font. If I had practised the art of reading your letters all my life, I couldn't do it better. And then I approve of small MS. upon principle. Think of what an immense quantity of physical energy must go to the making of those immense sweeping handwritings achieved by some persons. . . Mr. Landor, for instance, who writes as if he had the sky for a copybook and dotted his *'s in proportion. People who do such things should wear gauntlets; yes, and have none to wear; or they wouldn't waste their time so. People who write — by pro- fession — shall I say? — never should do it, or what will be- come of them when most of their strength retires into their head and heart, (as is the case with some of us and may be the case with all) and when they have to write a poem twelve times over, as Mr. Kenyon says I should do if I were virtuous? Not that I do it. Does anybody do it, I wonder? Do you, ever? From what you tell me of the trimming of the light, I imagine not. And besides, one may be laborious as a writer, without copying twelve times over. I believe there are people who will tell you in a moment what three times six is, without ' doing it ' on their fingers; and in the same way one may work one's verses in one's head quite as laboriously as on paper — I maintain it. 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 21 I consider myself a very patient, laborious writer — though dear Mr. Kenyon laughs me to scorn when I say so. And just see how it could be otherwise. If I were netting a purse I might be thinking of something else and drop my stitches ; or even if I were writing verses to please a popu- lar taste, I might be careless in it. But the pursuit of an Ideal acknowledged by the mind, will draw and concentrate the powers of the mind — and Art, you know, is a jealous god and demands the whole man — or woman. I cannot conceive of a sincere artist who is also a careless one — though one may have a quicker hand than another, in gen- eral, — and though all are liable to vicissitudes in the de- gree of facility — and to entanglements in the machinery, notwithstanding every degree of facility. You may write twenty lines one day — or even three like Euripides in three days — and a hundred lines in one more day — and yet on the hundred, may have been expended as much good work, as on the twenty and the three. And also, as you say, the lamp is trimmed behind the wall — and the act of utterance is the evidence of foregone study still more than it is the occasion to study. The deep interest with which I read all that you had the kindness to write to me of yourself, you must trust me for, as I rind it hard to ex- press it. It is sympathy in one way, and interest every way ! And now, see ! Although you proved to me with admirable logic that, for reasons which you know and rea- sons which you don't know, I couldn't possibly know any- thing about you; though that is all true — and proven (which is better than true) — I really did understand of you before I was told, exactly what you told me. Yes, I did indeed. I felt sure that as a poet you fronted the future — and that your chief works, in your own apprehension, were to come. Oh — I take no credit of sagacity for it ; as I did not long ago to my sisters and brothers, when I pro- fessed to have knowledge of all their friends whom I never saw in my life, by the image coming with the name ; and threw them into shouts of laughter by giving out all the 22 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [Feb. It blue eyes and black eyes and hazel eyes and noses Roman and Gothic ticketed aright for the Mr. Smiths and Misa Hawkinses — and hit the bull's eye and the true features of the case, ten times out of twelve ! But you are different. You are to be made out by the comparative anatomy sys- tem. You have thrown out fragments of os . . sublime . . indicative of soul-mammothism — and you live to develop your nature, — if you live. That is easy and plain. You have taken a great range — from those high faint notes of the mystics which are beyond personality . . to dra- matic impersonations, gruff with nature, ' gr-r-r- you swine ' ; and when these are thrown into harmony, as in a manner they are in ' Pippa Passes ' (which I could find in my heart to covet the authorship of, more than any of your works — ), the combinations of effect must always be striking and noble — and you must feel yourself drawn on to such combinations more and more. But I do not, you say, know yourself — you. I only know abilities and facul- ties. Well, then, teach me yourself — you. I will not in- sist on the knowledge — and, in fact, you have not written the B. B. poem yet — your rays fall obliquely rather than directly straight. I see you only in your moon. Do tell me all of yourself that you can and will . . before the R. B. poem comes out. And what is ' Luria ' ? A poem and not a drama? I mean, a poem not in the dramatic form? Well ! I have wondered at you sometimes, not for daring, but for bearing to trust your noble works into the great mill of the ' rank, popular ' playhouse, to be ground to pieces between the teeth of vulgar actors and actresses. I, for one, would as soon have ' my soul among lions. ' ' There is a fascination in it,' says Miss Mitford, and I am sure there must be, to account for it. Publics in the mass are bad enough ; but to distil the dregs of the public and bap- tise oneself in that acrid moisture, where can be the temp- tation? I could swear by Shakespeare, as was once sworn ' by those dead at Marathon, ' that I do not see where. I love the drama too. I look to our old dramatists as to om 1845J AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 23 Kings and princes in poetry. I love them through all the deeps of their abominations. But the theatre in those days was a better medium between the people and the poet; and the press in those days was a less sufficient medium than now. Still, the poet suffered by the theatre even then ; and the reasons are very obvious. How true — how true . . is all you say about critics. My convictions follow you in every word. And I delight- ed to read your views of the poet's right aspect towards criticism — I read them with the most complete apprecia- tion and sympathy. I have sometimes thought that it would be a curious and instructive process, as illustrative of the wisdom and apprehensiveness of critics, if anyone would collect the critical soliloquies of every age touching its own literature, (as far as such may be extant) and con- fer them with the literary product of the said ages. Pro- fessor Wilson has begun something of the kind apparently, in his initiatory paper of the last Blackwood number on critics, beginning with Dryden — but he seems to have no design in his notice — it is a mere critique on the critic. And then, he should have begun earlier than Dryden — earlier even than Sir Philip Sydney, who in the noble * Discourse on Poetry, ' gives such singular evidence of being stone-critic-blind to the gods who moved around him. As far as I can remember, he saw even Shakespeare but indifferently. Oh, it was in his eyes quite an unil- lumed age, that period of Elizabeth which we see full of suns ! and few can see what is close to the eyes though they run their heads against it; the denial of contempo- rary genius is the rule rather than the exception. No one counts the eagles in the nest, till there is a rush of wings ; and lo! they are flown. And here we speak of under- standing men, such as the Sydneys and the Drydens. Of the great body of critics you observe rightly, that they are better than might be expected of their badness, only the fact of their influence is no less undeniable than the reason why they should not be influential, The brazen kettles 24 THE LETTERS OF EOBERT BROWNING [Feb. 17 will be taken for oracles all the world over. But the influ- ence is for to-day, for this hour — not for to-morrow and the day after — unless indeed, as you say, the poet do him- self perpetuate the influence by submitting to it. Do you know Tennyson? — that is, with a face to face knowledge? I have great admiration for him. In execution, he is ex- quisite, — and, in music, a most subtle weigher out to the ear of fine airs. That such a poet should submit blindly to the suggestions of his critics, (I do not say that sugges- tions from without may not be accepted with discrimina- tion sometimes, to the benefit of the acceptor), blindly and implicitly to the suggestions of his critics, is much as if Babbage were to take my opinion and undo his calculating machine by it. Napoleon called poetry science creuse — which, although he was not scientific in poetry himself, is true enough. But anybody is qualified, according to everybody, for giving opinions upon poetry. It is not so in chymistry and mathematics. Nor is it so, I believe, in whist and the polka. But then these are more serious things. Yes — and it does delight me to hear of your garden full of roses and soul full of comforts ! You have the right to both — you have the key to both. You have written enough to live by, though only beginning to write, as you say of yourself. And this reminds me to remind you that when I talked of coveting most of the authorship of your ' Pip- pa,' I did not mean to call it your finest work (you might reproach me for that), but just to express a per- sonal feeling. Do you know what it is to covet your neighbour's poetry? — not his fame, but his poetry? — I dare say not. You are too generous. And, in fact, beauty is beauty, and, whether it comes by our own hand or another's, blessed be the coming of it! /, be- sides, feel that. And yet — and yet, I have been aware of a feeling within me which has spoken two or three times to the effect of a wish, that I had been visited with the vision of ' Pippa', before you — and conjitear tibi — 1845] AND ELIZABETH BAKEETT 25 I confess the baseness of it. The conception is, to my mind, most exquisite and altogether original — and the contrast in the working out of the plan, singularly expres- sive of various faculty. Is the poem under your thumb, emerging from it? and in what metre? May I ask such questions? And does Mr. Carlyle tell you that he has forbidden all ' singing ' to this perverse and froward generation, which should work and not sing? And have you told Mr. Car- lyle that song is work, and also the condition of work? I am a devout sitter at his feet — and it is an effort to me to think him wrong in anything — and once when he told me to write prose and not verse, I fancied that his opinion was I had mistaken my calling, — a fancy which in infinite kindness and gentleness he stooped immediately to correct. I never shall forget the grace of that kindness — but then ! For him to have thought ill of me, would not have been strange — I often think ill of myself, as God knows. But for Carlyle to think of putting away, even for a season, the poetry of the world, was wonderful, and has left me ruffled in my thoughts ever since. I do not know him personally at all. But as his disciple I ventured (by an exceptional motive) to send him my poems, and I heard from him as a consequence. ' Dear and noble ' he is indeed — and a poet unaware of himself; all but the sense of music. You feel it so — do you not? And the ' dear sir ' has let him have the ' letter of Cromwell,' I hope; and satisfied 'the obedient servant.' The curious thing in this world is not the stupidity, but the upper-handism of the stupidity. The geese are in the Capitol, and the Romans in the farm- yard — and it seems all quite natural that it should be so, both to geese and Romans ! But there are things you say, which seem to me super- natural, for reasons which I know and for reasons which I don't know. You will let me be grateful to you, — will you not? You must, if you will or not. And also — I would not wait for more leave — if I could but see your desk — as 26 THE LETTEES OF ROBERT BROWNING [Feb. 17 I do your death's heads and the spider-webs appertain- ing ; but the soul of Cornelius Agrippa fades from me. Ever faithfully yours, Elizabeth B. Babrett. B. B. to E. B. B. Wednesday morning— Spring ! [Post-mark, February 26, 1845.] Real warm Spring, dear Miss Barrett, and the birds know it; and in Spring I shall see you, surely see you — for when did I once fail to get whatever I had set my heart upon? As I ask myself sometimes, with a strange fear. I took up this paper to write a great deal — now, I don't think I shall write much — ' I shall see you, ' I say ! That ' Luria ' you enquire about, shall be my last play — for it is but a play, woe's me ! I have one done here, 'A Soul's Tragedy,' as it is properly enough called, but that would not do to end with (end I will), and Luria is a Moor, of Othello's country, and devotes himself to some- thing he thinks Florence, and the old fortune follows — all in my brain, yet, but the bright weather helps and I will soon loosen my Braccio and Puccio (a pale discontented man), and Tiburzio (the Pisan, good true fellow, this one), and Domizia the Lady — loosen all these on dear foolish (rav- ishing must his folly be) , golden-hearted Luria, all these with their worldly-wisdom and Tuscan shrewd ways ; and, for me, the misfortune is, I sympathise just as much with these as with him, — so there can no good come of keeping this wild company any longer, and ' Luria ' and the other sadder ruin of one Chiappino — these got rid of, I will do as you bid me, and — say first I have some Romances and Lyrics, all dramatic, to dispatch, and then, I shall stoop of a sudden under and out of this dancing ring of men and women hand in hand, and stand still awhile, should my eyes dazzle, and when that's over, they will be gone and you will be there, pas vrai ? For, as I think I told you, 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 27 I always stiver involuntarily when I look — no, glance — at this First Poem of mine to be. 'JSloiv,' I call it, what, upon my soul, — for a solemn matter it is, — what is to be done 7ioio, believed noiv, so far as it has been revealed to me — solemn words, truly — and to find myself writing them to any one else ! Enough now. I know Tennyson ' face to face,' — no more than that. I know Carlyle and love him — know him so well, that I would have told you he had shaken that grand head of his at ' singing, ' so thoroughly does he love and live by it. When I last saw him, a fortnight ago, he turned, from I don't know what other talk, quite abruptly on me with, ' Did you never try to write a. Song? Of all things in the world, that I should be proudest to do. ' Then came his definition of a song — then, with an appealing look to Mrs. C, ' I always say that some day in spite of nature and my stars, I shall burst into a song ' (he is not mechanically ' musical,' he meant, and the music is the poetry, he holds, and should enwrap the thought as Donne says ' an amber- drop enwraps a bee '), and then he began to recite an old Scotch song, stopping at the first rude couplet, ' The be- ginning words are merely to set the tune, they tell me' — and then again at the couplet about — or, to the effect that — c give me ' (but in broad Scotch) ' give me but my lass, I care not for my cogie.' 'He says/ quoth Carlyle magis- terially, ' that if you allow him the love of his lass, you may take away all else, even his cogie, his cup or can, and he cares not,' just as a professor expounds Lycophron. And just before I left England, six months ago, did not I hear him croon, if not certainty sing, ' Charlie is my dar- ling ' (' my darling ' with an adoring emphasis), and then he stood back, as it were, from the song, to look at it better, and said ' How must that notion of ideal wondrous perfec- tion have impressed itself in this old Jacobite's "young Cavalier" — ("They go to save their land, and the young Cavalier ! /") — when I who care nothing about such a rag of a man, cannot but feel as he felt, in speaking his words 28 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [Feb. 26 after him ! ' After saying which, he would be sure to coun- sel everybody to get their heads clear of all singing ! Don't let me forget to clap hands, we got the letter, dearly bought as it was by the ' Dear Sirs,' &c, and insignificant scrap as it proved, but still it is got, to my encouragement in diplo- macy. Who told you of my sculls and spider webs — Home? Last year I petted extraordinarily a fine fellow, (a garden spider — there was the singularity, — the thin clever-even-for a spider-sort, and they are so ' spirited and sly, ' all of them — this kind makes a long cone of web, with a square chamber of vantage at the end, and there he sits loosely and looks about) , a great fellow that housed himself, with real gusto, in the jaws of a great scull, whence he watched me as I wrote, and I remember speaking to Home about his good points. Phrenologists look gravely at that great scull, by the way, and hope, in their grim manner, that its owner made a good end. He looks quietly, now, out at the green little hill behind. I have no little insight to the feelings of furniture, and treat books and prints with a rea- sonable consideration. How some people use their pictures, for instance, is a mystery to me; very revolting all the same — portraits obliged to face each other for ever, — prints put together in portfolios. My Polidoro's perfect Andro- meda along with ' Boors Carousing,' by Ostade, — where I found her, — my own father's doing, or I would say more. And when I have said I like ' Pippa ' better than any- thing else I have done yet, I shall have answered all you bade me. And now may J begin questioning? No, — for it is all a pure delight to me, so that you do but write. I never was without good, kind, generous friends and lovers, so they say — so they were and are — perhaps they came at the wrong time— I never wanted them — though that makes no difference in my gratitude, I trust — but I know myself ■ — surely — and always have done so, for is there not some- where the little book I first printed when a boy, with John Mill, the metaphysical head, his marginal note that ' the 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 29 writer possesses a deeper self-consciousness than I ever knew in a sane human being. ' So I never deceived myself much, nor called ^ my feelings for people other than they were. And who has a right to say, if I have not, that I had, but I said that, supernatural or no. Pray tell me, too, of your present doings and projects, and never write yourself ' grateful ' to me, who am grateful, very grateful to you, — for none of your words but I take in earnest — and tell me if Spring be not coming, come, and I will take to writing the gravest of letters, because this beginning is for gladness' sake, like Carlyle's song couplet. My head aches a little to-day too, and, as poor dear Kirke White said to the moon, from his heap of mathematical papers, ' I throw aside the learned sheet ; 'I cannot choose but gaze, she looks so— mildly sweet. ' Out on the foolish phrase, but there's hard rhyming with- out it. Ever yours faithfully, Robert Browning. K B. B. to B. B. 50 Wimpole Street : Feb. 27, 1845. Yes, but, dear Mr. Browning, I want the spring accord- ing to the new ' style ' (mine), and not the old one of you and the rest of the poets. To me unhappily, the snowdrop is much the same as the snow — it feels as cold underfoot — and I have grown sceptical about ' the voice of the turtle, ' the east winds blow so loud. April is a Parthian with a dart, and May (at least the early part of it) a spy in the camp. That is my idea of what you call spring ; mine, in the new style ! A little later comes my spring ; and indeed after such severe weather, from which I have just escaped with my life, I may thank it for coming at all. How happy you are, to be able to listen to the ' birds ' without the com- mentary of the east wind, which, like other commentaries, spoils the music. And how happy I am to listen to you, when you write such kind open-hearted letters to me ! I 30 THE LETTEES OF ROBERT BROWNING [Feb. 27 am delighted to hear all you say to me of yourself, and ' Luria,' and the spider, and to do him no dishonour in the association, of the great teacher of the age, Carlyle, who is also yours and mine. He fills the office of a poet — does he not? — by analysing humanity back into its elements, to the destruction of the conventions of the hour. That is — strictly speaking — the office of the poet, is it not? — and he discharges it fully, and with a wider intelligibility per- haps as far as the contemporary period is concerned, than if he did forthwith ' burst into a song. ' But how I do wander ! — I meant to say, and I will call myself back to say, that spring will really come some day I hope and believe, and the warm settled weather with it, and that then I shall be probably fitter for certain pleas- ures than I can appear even to myself how. And, in the meantime, I seem to see ' Luria ' instead of you ; I have visions and dream dreams. And the ' Soul's Tragedy, ' which sounds to me like the step of a ghost of an old Drama ! and you are not to think that I blaspheme the Drama, dear Mr. Browning ; or that I ever thought of exhorting you to give up the ' solemn robes ' and tread of the buskin. It is the theatre which vulgarises these things; the modern theatre in which we see no altar ! where the thymele is replaced by the caprice of a popular actor. And also, I have a fancy that your great dramatic power would work more clearly and audibly in the less definite mould — but you ride your own faculty as Oceanus did his sea-horse, ' directing it by your will ; ' and woe to the im- pertinence, which would dare to say ' turn this way ' or ' turn from that way ' — it should not be my impertinence. Do not think I blaspheme the Drama. I have gone through ' all such reading as should never be read ' (that is, by women!), through my love of it on the contrary. And the dramatic faculty is strong in you — and therefore, as ' I speak unto a wise man, judge what I say.' For myself and my own doings, you shall hear directly what I have been doing, and what I am about to do. Some 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 31 years ago, as perhaps you may have heard, (but I hope not, for the fewer who hear of it the better) — some years ago, I translated or rather undid into English, the ' Prome- theus ' of iEschylus. To speak of this production mode- rately (not modestly), it is the most miserable of all miser- able versions of the class. It was completed (in the first place) in thirteen days — the iambics thrown into blank verse, the lyrics into rhymed octosyllabics and the like — and the whole together as cold as Caucasus, and as flat as the nearest plain. To account for this, the haste may be something; but if my mind had been properly awakened at the time, I might have made still more haste and done it better. Well, — the comfort is, that the little book was unadvertised and unknown, and that most of the copies (through my entreaty of my father) are shut up in the wardrobe of his bedroom. If ever I get well I shall show m y j°y by making a bonfire of them. In the meantime, the recollection of this sin of mine has been my nightmare and daymare too, and the sin has been the ' Blot on my escutcheon.' I could look in nobody's face, with a ' Thou canst not say I did it ' — I know, I did it. And so I re- solved to wash away the transgression, and translate the tragedy over again. It was an honest straightforward proof of repentance — was it not? and I have completed it, except the transcription and last polishing. If iEschylus stands at the foot of my bed now, I shall have a little breath to front him. I have done m} r duty by him, not indeed ac- cording to his claims, but in proportion to my faculty. Whether I shall ever publish or not (remember) remains to be considered — that is a different side of the subject. If I do, it may be in a magazine — or — but this is another ground. And then, I have in my head to associate with the version a monodrama of my own — not a long poem, but a monologue of iEschylus as he sate a blind exile on the flats of Sicily and recounted the past to his own soul, just before the eagle cracked his great massy skull with a stone. 32 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [Feb. 27 But my chief intention just now is the writing of a sort of novel-poem — a poem as completely modern as ' Geral- dine's Courtship, ' running into the midst of our conven- tions, and rushing into drawing-rooms and the like ' where angels fear to tread;' and so, meeting face to face and without mask the Humanitj 7, of the age, and speaking the truth as I conceive of it out plainly. That is my inten- tion. It is not mature enough yet to be called a plan. I am waiting for a story, and I won't take one, because I want to make one, and I like to make my own stories, because then I can take liberties with them in the treat- merit. Who told me of your skulls and spiders? Why, couldn't I know it without being told? Did Cornelius Agrippa know nothing without being told? Mr. Home never spoke it to my ears — (I never saw him face to face in my life, al- though we have corresponded for long and long), and he never wrote it to my eyes. Perhaps he does not know that I know it. Well, then ! if I were to say that i" heard it from you yourself, how would you answer? And it was so. Why, are you not aware that these are the days of mes- merism and clairvoyance? Are you an infidel? I have believed in your skulls for the last year, for my part. And I have some sympathy in your habit of feeling for chairs and tables. I remember, when I was a child and wrote poems in little clasped books, I used to kiss the books and put them away tenderly because I had been happy near them, and take them out by turns when I was going from home, to cheer them by the change of air and the pleasure of the new place. This, not for the sake of the verses written in them, and not for the sake of writing more verses in them, but from pure gratitude. Other books I used to treat in a like manner — and to talk to the trees and the flowers, was a natural inclination — but be- tween me and that time, the cypresses grow thick and dark. Is it true that your wishes fulfil themselves? And when 1845] AND ELIZABETH BAEEETT 33 they do, are they not bitter to your taste — do you not wish them imfulfilled? Oh, this life, this life! There is com- fort in it, they say, and I almost believe — but the brightest place in the house, is the leaning out of the window — at least, for me. Of course you are self-conscious — How could you be a poet otherwise? Tell me. Ever faithfully yours, E. B. B. And was the little book written with Mr. Mill pure meta- physics, or what? R. B. to E. B. B. Saturday Night, March 1 [1845] . Dear Miss Barrett, — I seem to find of a sudden — surely I knew before — anyhow, I do find now, that with the oc- taves on octaves of quite new golden strings you enlarged the compass of my life's harp with, there is added, too, such a tragic chord, that which you touched, so geutly, in the beginning of your letter I got this morning, ' just es- caping ' &c. But if my truest heart's wishes avail, as they have hitherto done, you shall laugh at East winds yet, as I do ! See now, this sad feeling is so strange to me, that I must write it out, must, and you might give me great, the greatest pleasure for years and yet find me as passive as a stone used to wine libations, and as ready in expressing my sense of them, but when I am pained, I find the old theory of the uselessness of communicating the circum- stances of it, singularly untenable. I have been ' spoiled ' in this world — to such an extent, indeed, that I often reason out — make clear to myself — that I might very properly, so far as myself am concerned, take any step that would peril the whole of my future happiness — because the past is gained, secure, and on record; and, though not another of the old days should dawn on me. I shall not have lost my Vol. I.— 3 34 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [Mar. 1 life, no ! Out of all which you are — please — to make a sort of sense, if you can, so as to express that I have been deeply struck to find a new real unmistakable sorrow along with these as real but not so new joys you have given me. How strangely this connects itself in my mind with an- other subject in your note ! I looked at that translation for a minute, not longer, years ago, knowing nothing about it or you, and I only looked to see what rendering a pas- sage had received that was often in my thoughts.' I forget your version (it was not yours, my ' yours ' then ; I mean I had no extraordinary interest about it), but the original makes Prometheus (telling over his bestowments towards human happiness) say, as something nepacripu) rav^-, that he stopped mortals py icpodipxeaOai fidpov — to xotov eupwv, asks the Chorus, r-^ads yd.pp.axuv uocou? Whereto he replies, roTzuu l coming from the own mind of the Titan, if you will, and all the while he shall be pro- ceeding steadily in the alleviation of the sufferings of mor- tals whom, vvjnious ovzag rd -Kpiv, evvous xa\ ^>iXrj/ia* to be a 1 [lb. 11 : ' Leave off his old trick of loving man. '] 8 [lb. 443, 444 : ' Being fools before, I made them wise and true in aim of soul.'] 8 [lb. 250 : ' Blind hopes. '] * [lb. 251 : 'A great benefit. '] 40 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [Mar. 12 deep great truth ; if there were no life beyond this, I think the hope in one would be an incalculable blessing for this life, which is melancholy for one like iEschylus to feel, if he could only hope, because the argument as to the ulterior good of those hopes is cut clean away, and what had he left? I do not find it take away from my feeling of the magna- nimity of Prometheus that he should, in truth, complain (as he does from beginning to end) of what he finds him- self suffering. He could have prevented all, and can stop it now — of that he never thinks for a moment. That was the old Greek way — they never let an antagonistic passion neutralise the other which was to influence the man to his praise or blame. A Greek hero fears exceedingly and bat- tles it out, cries out when he is wounded and fights on, does not say his love or hate makes him see no danger or feel no pain. iEschylus from first word to last QSeaOi /jz, o\a Ttdcyu) 1 to £ose iEschylus to have done — in your poem you shall make Prometheus our way. And now enough of Greek, which I am fast forgetting (for I never look at books I loved once) — it was your men- tion of the translation that brought out the old fast fading outlines of the Poem in my brain — the Greek poem, that is. You think — for I must get to you — that I ' uncon- sciously exaggerate what you are to me.' Now, you don't know what that is, nor can I very well tell you, because the language with which I talk to myself of these matters is spiritual Attic, and 'loves contractions,' as grammarians say ; but I read it myself, and well know what it means, that's why I told you I was self-conscious— I meant that I never yet mistook my own feelings, one for another — there ! 1 [lb. 92 : ' Behold what I suffer. *] 2 [lb. 1093 ; 'Dost see how I suffer this wrong? '] 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 41 Of what use is talking? Only do you stay here with me in the ' House ' these few short years. Do you think I shall see you in two months, three months? I may travel, per- haps. So you have got to like society, and would enjoy it, you think? For me, I always hated it — have put up with it these six or seven years past, lest by foregoing it I should let some unknown good escape me, in the true time of it, and only discover my fault when too late ; and now that I have done most of what is to be done, any lodge in a garden of cucumbers for me ! I don't even care about reading now — the world, and pictures of it, rather than writings about the world ! But you must read books in order to get words and forms for ' the public ' if you write, and that you needs must do, if you fear God. I have no pleasure in writing myself — none, in the mere act — though all pleasure in the sense of fulfilling a duty, whence, if I have done my real best, judge how heart-breaking a matter must it be to be pronounced a poor creature by critic this and acquaintance the other. But I think you like the ope- ration of writing as I should like that of painting or making music, do you not? After all, there is a great delight in the heart of the thing ; and use and forethought have made me ready at all times to set to work — but — I don't know why— my heart sinks whenever I open this desk, and rises when I shut it. Yet but for what I have written you would never have heard of me — and through what you have writ- ten, not properly for it, I love and wish you well! Now, will you remember what I began my letter by saying — how you have promised to let me know if my wishing takes effect, and if you still continue better? And not even . . (since we are learned in magnanimity) don't even tell me that or anything else, if it teases you, — but wait your own good time, and know me for . . if these words were but my own, and fresh-minted for this moment's use ! . . Yours ever faithfully, K. Browning. 42 THE LETTERS OE ROBERT BROWNING [Mar. 20 E. B. B. to R. B. 50 Wimpole Street : March 20, 1845. Whenever I delay to write to you, dear Mr. Browning, it is not, be sure, that I take my ' own good time, ' but sub- mit to my own bad time. It was kind of you to wish to know how I was, and not unkind of me to suspend my answer to your question — for indeed I have not been very well, nor have had much heart for saying so. This implacable weather! this east wind that seems to blow through the sun and moon ! who can be well in such a wind? Yet for me, I should not grumble. There has been nothing very bad the matter with me, as there used to be — I only grow weaker than usual, and learn my lesson of be- ing mortal, in a corner — and then all this must end ! April is coming. There will be both a May and a June if we live to see such things, and perhaps, after all, we may. And as to seeing you besides, I observe that you distrust me, and that perhaps you penetrate my morbidity and guess how when the moment comes to see a living human face to which I am not accustomed, I shrink and grow pale in the spirit. Do you? You are learned in human nature, and you know the consequences of leading such a secluded life as mine — notwithstanding all my fine philosophy about social duties and the like — well — if you have such knowl- edge or if you have it not, I cannot say, but I do say that I will indeed see you when the warm weather has revived me a little, and put the earth ' to rights ' again so as to make pleasures of the sort possible. For if you think that I shall not like to see you, you are wrong, for all your learning. But I shall be afraid of you at first — though I am not, in writing thus. You are Paracelsus, and I am a recluse, with nerves that have been all broken on the rack, and now hang loosely — quivering at a step and breath. And what you say of society draws me on to many com- parative thoughts of your life and mine. You seem to have 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 43 drunken of the cup of life full, with the sun shining on it. I have lived only inwardly ; or with sorrow, for a strong emotion. Before this seclusion of rny illness, I was se- cluded still, and there are few of the youngest women in the world who have not seen more, heard more, known more, of society, than I, who am scarcely to be called young now. I grew up in the country — had no social op- portunities, had my heart in books and poetry, and my experience in reveries. My sympathies drooped towards the ground like an untrained honeysuckle — and but for one, in my own house — but of this I cannot speak. It was a lonely life, growing green like the grass around it. Books and dreams were what I lived in — and domestic life only seemed to buzz gently around, like the bees about the grass. And so time passed, and passed — and afterwards, when my illness came and I seemed to stand at the edge of the world with all done, and no prospect (as appeared at one time) of ever passing the threshold of one room again; why then, I turned to thinking with some bitterness (after the greatest sorrow of my life had given me room and time to breathe) that I had stood blind in this temple I was about to leave — that I had seen no Human nature, that my brothers and sisters of the earth were names to me, that I had beheld no great mountain or river, nothing in fact. I was as a man dying who had not read Shakespeare, and it was too late ! do you understand? And do you also know what a disadvantage this ignorance is to my art? Why, if I live on and yet do not escape from this seclusion, do you not perceive that I labour under signal disadvantages — that I am, in a manner, as a blind poet? Certainly, there is a compensation to a degree. I have had much of the inner life, and from the habit of self-consciousness and self- analysis, I make great guesses at Human nature in the main. But how willingly I would as a poet exchange some of this lumbering, ponderous, helpless knowledge of books, for some experience of life and man, for some . . . But all grumbling is a vile thing. We should all thank 44 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [Mar. 20 God for our measures of life, and think them enough for each of us. I write so, that you may not mistake what I wrote before in relation to society, although you do not see from my point of view; and that you may understand what I mean fully when I say, that I have lived all my chief joys, and indeed nearly all emotions that go warmly by that name and relate to myself personally, in poetry and in poetry alone. Like to write? Of course, of course I do. I seem to live while I write — it is life, for me. Why, what is to live? Not to eat and drink and breathe, — but to feel the life in you down all the fibres of being, passionately and joyfully. And thus, one lives in composition surely — not always — but when the wheel goes round and the pro- cession is uninterrupted. Is it not so with you? oh — it must be so. For the rest, there will be necessarily a re- action ; and, in my own particular case, whenever I see a poem of mine in print, or even smoothly transcribed, the reaction is most painful. The pleasure, the sense of power, without which I could not write a line, is gone in a mo- ment; and nothing remains but disappointment and humil- iation. I never wrote a poem which you could not per- suade me to tear to pieces if you took me at the right moment ! I have a seasonable humility, I do assure you. How delightful to talk about oneself; but as you ' tempted me and I did eat, ' I entreat your longsuffering of rny sin, and ah! if you would but sin back so in turn! You and I seem to meet in a mild contrarious harmony . . as in the ' si no, si no ' of an Italian duet. I want to see more of men, and you have seen too much, you say. I am in ignorance, and you, in satiety. ' You don't even care about reading now.' Is it possible? And I am as ' fresh ' about reading, as ever I was — as long as I keep out of the shadow of the dictionaries and of theological controversies, and the like. Shall I whisper it to you under the memory of the last rose of last summer? / am very fond of ro- mances; yes! and I read them not only as some wise peo- ple are known to do, for the sake of the eloquence here and 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 45 the sentiment there, and the graphic intermixtures here and there, but for the story ! just as little children would, sitting on their papa's knee. My childish love of a story never wore out with my love of plum cake, and now there is not a hole in it. I make it a rule, for the most part, to read all the romances that other people are kind enough to write — and woe to the miserable wight who tells me how the third volume endeth. Have you in you any surviving innocence of this sort? or do you call it idiocy? If you do, I will forgive you, only smiling to myself — I give you notice — with a smile of superior pleasure! Mr. Choiiey made me quite laugh the other day by recommending Mary Howitt's ' Improvisatore, ' with a sort of deprecating refer- ence to the descriptions in the book, just as if I never read a novel — 1 1 I wrote a confession back to him which made him shake his head perhaps, and now I confess to you, unprovoked. I am one who could have forgotten the plague, listening to Boccaccio's stories; and I am not ashamed of it. I do not even ' see the better part, ' I am so silly. Ah ! you tempt me with a grand vision of Prometheus ! i, who have just escaped with my life, after treading Mil- ton's ground, you would send me to JEschylus's. No, i" do not dare. And besides ... I am inclined to think that we want new forms, as well as thoughts. The old gods are dethroned. Why should we go back to the antique moulds, classical moulds, as they are so improperly called? If it is a necessity of Art to do so, why then those critics are right who hold that Art is exhausted and the world too worn out for poetry. I do not, for my part, believe this : and I believe the so-called necessity of Art to be the mere feebleness of the artist. Let us all aspire rather to Life, and let the dead bur}'- their dead. If we have but courage to face these conventions, to touch this low ground, we shall take strength from it instead of losing it ; and of that, I am intimately persuaded. For there is poetry every- where ; the ' treasure ' (see the old fable) lies all over the 46 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [Mar. 20 field. And then Christianity is a worthy myth, and poeti- cally acceptable. I had much to say to you, or at least something, of the ' blind hopes ' &c, but am ashamed to take a step into a new sheet. If you mean c to travel, ' why, I shall have to miss you. Do you really mean it? How is the play going on? and the poem? May God bless you ! Ever and truly yours, E. B. B. B. B. to E. B. B. Monday Morning [Post-mark, March 31, 1845.] When you read Don Quixote, my dear romance-reader, do you ever notice that flower of an incident of good fel- lowship where the friendly Squire of Him of the Moon, or the Looking glasses, (I forget which) passes to Sancho's dry lips, (all under a cork-tree one morning) — a plump wine-skin, — and do you admire dear brave Miguel's knowl- edge of thirsty nature when he tells you that the Drinker, having seriously considered for a space the pleiads, or place where they should be, fell, as he slowly returned the shrivelled bottle to its donor, into a deep musing of an hour's length, or thereabouts, and then . . mark . . only then, fetching a profound sigh, broke silence with . . such a piece of praise as turns pale the labours in that way of Rabelais and the Teian (if he wasn't a Byzantine monk, alas !) and our Mr. Kenyon's stately self — (since my own especial poet a moi, that can do all with anybody, only ' sips like a fly,' she says, and so cares not to compete with these behemoths that drink up Jordan) — Well, then . . (oh, I must get quick to the sentence's end, and be brief as an oracle-explainer !) — the giver is you and the taker is I, and the letter is the wine, and the star-gazing is the read- ing the same, and the brown study is — how shall I deserve and be grateful enough to this new strange frieud of my 1845] AND ELIZABETH BAKRETT 4? own, that has taken away my reproach among men, that have each and all their friend, so they say ( . . not that I believe all they say — they boast too soon sometimes, no doubt, — I once was shown a letter wherein the truth stum- bled out after this fashion 'Dere Smith, — I calls you " dere" . . because you are so in your shop!') — and the great sigh is, — there is no deserving nor being grateful at all, — and the breaking silence is, and the praise is . . ah, there, enough of it ! This sunny morning is as if I wished it for you — 10 strikes by the clock now — tell me if at 10 this morning you feel any good from my heart's wishes for you — I would give you all you want out of my own life and glad- ness and yet keep twice the stock that should by right have sufficed the thin white face that is laughing at me in the glass yonder at the fancy of its making anyone afraid . . and now, with another kind of laugh, at the thought that when its owner ' travels ' next, he will leave off Miss Barrett along with port- wine — Dii meliora pits, and, among them to Yours every where, and at all times yours E. Browning. I have all to say yet — next letter. R. B. B. B. to E. B. B. Tuesday Night. [Post-mark, April 16, 1845.] I heard of you, dear Miss Barrett, between a Polka and a Cellarius the other evening, of Mr. Kenyon — how this wind must hurt you ! And yesterday I had occasion to go your way — past, that is, Wimpole Street, the end of it, — ■ and, do you know, I did not seem to have leave from you to go down it yet, much less count number after number till I came to yours, — much least than less, look up when I did come there. So I went on to a viperine she-friend of mine who, I think, rather loves me she does so hate me, and we talked over the chances of certain other friends who 48 THE LETTEES OF ROBERT BROWNING [April 16 were to be balloted for at the 'Athenaeum ' last night, — one of whom, it seems, was in a fright about it — ' to such little purpose ' said my friend — ' for he is so inoffensive — now, if one were to style you that — ' ' Or you ' — I said — and so we hugged ourselves in our grimness like tiger-cats. Then there is a deal in the papers to-day about Maynooth, and a meeting presided over by Lord Mayor Gibbs, and the Reverend Mr. Somebody's speech. And Mrs. Norton has gone and book-made at a great rate about the Prince of Wales, pleasantly putting off till his time all that used of old to be put off till his mother's time; altogether, I should dearly like to hear from you, but not till the wind goes, and sun comes — because I shall see Mr. Kenyon next week and get him to tell me some more. By the way, do you suppose anybody else looks like him? If you do, the first room full of real London people you go among you will fancy to be lighted up by a saucer of burning salt and spirits of wine in the back ground. Monday — last night when I could do nothing else I be- gan to write to you, such writing as you have seen — strange ! The proper time and season for good sound sen- sible and profitable forms of speech — when ought it to have occurred, and how did I evade it in these letters of mine? For people begin with a graceful skittish levity, lest you should be struck all of a heap with what is to come, and that is sure to be the stuff and staple of the man, full of wisdom and sorrow, — and then again comes the fringe of reeds and pink little stones on the other side, that you may put foot on land, and draw breath, and think what a deep pond you have swum across, But you are the real deep wonder of a creature, — and I sail these paper-boats on you rather impudently. But I always mean to be very grave one day, — when I am in better spirits and can go fuori di me. And one thing I want to persuade you of, which is, that all you gain by travel is the discovery that you have gained nothing, and have done rightly in trusting to your innate 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 49 ideas — or not rightly in distrusting them, as the case may be. You get, too, a little . . perhaps a considerable, good, in finding the world's accepted moulds every where, into which you may run and fix your own fused metal, — but not a grain Troy-weight do you get of new gold, silver or brass. After this, you go boldly on your own resources, and are justified to yourself, that's all. Three scratches with a pen, 1 even with this pen, — and you have the green little Syrenusa where I have sate and heard the quails sing. One of these days I shall describe a country I have seen in my soul only, fruits, flowers, birds and all. Ever yours, dear Miss Barrett, E. Browning. E. B. B. to B. B. Thursday Morning. [Post-mark, April 18, 1845.] If you did but know dear Mr. Browning how often I have written . . not this letter I am about to write, but another better letter to you, . . in the midst of my silence, . . you would not think for a moment that the east wind, with all the harm it does to me, is able to do the great harm of putting out the light of the thought of you to my mind; for this, indeed, it has no power to do. I had the pen in my hand once to write ; and why it fell out, I can- not tell you. And you see, . . all your writing will not change the wind ! You wished all manner of good to me one day as the clock struck ten; yes, and I assure you I was better that day — and I must not forget to tell you so though it is so long since. And therefore, I was logically bound to believe that you had never thought of me since . . unless you thought east winds of me! That was quite clear; was it not? or would have been; if it had not been for the supernatural conviction, I had above all, of your kindness, which was too large to be taken in the hinge of 1 [A rough sketch follows in the original.] Vol. I.— 4 50 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [April 18 a syllogism. In fact I have long left off thinking that logic proves anything — it doesn't, you know. But your Lamia has taught you some subtle ' viperine ' reasoning and motiving, for the turning down one street in- stead of another. It was conclusive. Ah — but you will never persuade me that I am the bet- ter, or as well, for the thing that I have not. We look from different points of view, and yours is the point of at- tainment. Not that you do not truly say that, when all is done, we must come home to place our engines, and act by our own strength. I do not want material as material ; no one does — but every life requires a full experience, a va- rious experience — and I have a profound conviction that where a poet has been shut from most of the outward as- pects of life, he is at a lamentable disadvantage. Can you, speaking for yourself, separate the results in you from the external influences at work around you, that you say so boldly that you get nothing from the world? Tou do not directly, I know — but you do indirectly and by a rebound. Whatever acts upon you, becomes you — and whatever you love or hate, whatever charms you or is scorned by you, acts on you and becomes you. Have you read the ' Impro- visatore '? or will you? The writer seems to feel, just as I do, the good of the outward life ; and he is a poet in his soul. It is a book full of beauty and had a great charm to me. As to the Polkas and Cellariuses I do not covet them of course . . but what a strange world you seem to have, to me at a distance — what a strange husk of a world ! How it looks to me like mandarin-life or something as remote; nay, not mandarin-life but mandarin manners, . . life, even the outer life, meaning something deeper, in my ac- count of it. As to dear Mr. Kenyon I do not make the mistake of fancying that many can look like him or talk like him or be like him. I know enough to know other- wise. When he spoke of me he should have said that I was better notwithstanding the east wind. It is really true 1845] AND ELIZABETH BAERETT 51 — I am getting slowly up from the prostration of the severe cold, and feel stronger in myself. But Mrs. Norton discourses excellent music — and for the rest, there are fruits in the world so over-ripe, that they will fall, . . without being gathered. Let Maynooth wit- ness to it ! if you think it worth ivhile ! Ever yours, Elizabeth B. Bakeett. And is it nothing to be ' justified to one's self in one's resources? ' ' That's all, ' indeed ! For the ' soul's country ' we will have it also — and I know how well the birds sing in it. How glad I was by the way to see your letter ! B. B. to K B. B. Wednesday Morning. [Post-mark, April 30, 1845.] If you did but know, dear Miss Barrett, how the ' full stop ' after ' Morning ' just above, has turned out the fullest of stops, — and how for about a quarter of an hour since the ink dried I have been reasoning out the why and wherefore of the stopping, the wisdom of it, and the folly of it . . . By this time you see what you have got in me — You ask me questions, ' if I like novels, ' ' if the ' Improvisatore ' is not good,' 'if travel and sightseeing do not effect this and that for one, ' and ' what I am devising — play or poem, ' —and I shall not say I could not answer at all manner of lengths— but, let me only begin some good piece of writing of the kind, and . . no, you shall have it, have what I was going to tell you stops such judicious beginnings, — in a parallel case, out of which your ingenuity shall, please, pick the meaning — There is a story of D'Israeli's, an old one, with an episode of strange interest, or so I found it years ago, — well, you go breathlessly on with the people of it, page after page, till at last the end must come, you feel — and the tangled threads draw to one, and an out-of- 52 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [April30 door feast in the woods helps you . . that is, helps them, the people, wonderfully on, — and, lo, dinner is done, and Vivian Grey is here, and Violet Fane there, — and a detach- ment of the party is drafted off to go catch butterflies, and only two or three stop behind. At this moment, Mr. Somebody, a good man and rather the lady's uncle, ' in answer to a question from Violet, drew from his pocket a small neatly written manuscript, and, seating himself on an inverted wine-cooler, proceeded to read the following brief remarks upon the characteristics of the Mceso-gothic literature ' — this ends the page, — which you don't turn at once ! But when you do, in bitterness of soul, turn it, you read — ' On consideration, I ' (Ben, himself ) ' shall keep them for Mr. Colburn's New Magazine ' — and deeply you draw thankful breath ! (Note this 'parallel case' of mine is pretty sure to meet the usual fortune of my writings — • you will ask what it means — and this it means, or should mean, all of it, instance and reasoning and all, — that I am naturally earnest, in earnest about whatever thing I do, and little able to write about one thing while I think of another) — I think I will really write verse to you some day — this day, it is quite clear I had better give up trying. No, spite of all the lines in the world, I will make an end of it, as Ophelia with her swan's-song, — for it grows too absurd. But remember that I write letters to nobody but you, and that I want method and much more. That book you like so, the Danish novel, must be full of truth and beauty, to judge from the few extracts I have seen in Reviews. That a Dane should write so, confirms me in an old belief — that Italy is stuff for the use of the North, and no more — pure Poetry there is none, nearly as possi- ble none, in Dante even — material for Poetry in the pitiful- lest romancist of their thousands, on the contrary — strange that those great wide black eyes should stare nothing out of the earth that lies before them ! Alfieri, with even grey eyes, and a life of travel, writes you some fifteen tragedies 1845] AND ELIZABETH BAKKETT 53 as colourless as salad grown under a garden glass with matting over it — as free, that is, from local colouring, touches of the soil they are said to spring from, — think of 1 Saulle, ' and his Greek attempts ! I expected to see Mr. Kenyon, at a place where I was last week, but he kept away. Here is the bad wind back again, and the black sky. I am sure I never knew till now whether the East or West or South were the quarter to pray for — But surely the weather was a little better last week, and you, were you not better? And do you know — but it's all self -flattery I believe, — still I cannot help fan- cying the East wind does my head harm too ! Ever yours faithfully, E. Browning. E. u. JB. to R. B. Thursday. [Post-mark, May 2, 1845.] People say of you and of me, dear Mr. Browning, that we love the darkness and use a sphinxine idiom in our talk ; and really you do talk a little like a sphinx in your argu- ment drawn from ' Yivian Grey.' Once I sate up all night to read ' Vivian Grey ' ; but I never drew such an argument from him. Not that I give it up (nor you up) for a mere mystery. Nor that I can 'see what you Imve got in you,' from a mere guess. But just observe ! If I ask questions about novels, is it not because I want to know how much elbow-room there may be for our sympathies . . and whether there is room for my loose sleeves, and the lace lappets, as well as for my elbows ; and because I want to see you by the refracted lights as well as by the direct ones ; and because I am willing for you to know me from the beginning, with all my weaknesses and foolishnesses, . . as they are accounted by people who say to me s no one would ever think, without knowing you, that you were so and so. ' Now if I send all my idle questions to Colburrfs Magazine, with other Gothic literature, and take to standing up in a 54 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [May 2 perpendicular personality like the angel on the school- man's needle, in my letters to come, without further lean- ing to the left or the right — why the end would be that you would take to ' running after the butterflies, ' for change of air and exercise. And then . . oh . . then, my ' small neatly written manuscripts ' might fall back into my desk ... 1 {Not a /full stop'!.) Indeed . . I do assure you . . I never for a moment thought of ' making conversation ' about the ' Improvisa* tore ' or novels in general, when I wrote what I did to you. I might, to other persons . . perhaps. Certainly not to you. I was not dealing round from one pack of cards to you and to others. That's what you meant to reproach me for, you know — and of that, I am not guilty at all. I never could think of ' making conversation ' in a letter to you — never. Women are said to partake of the nature of chil- dren — and my brothers call me ' absurdly childish ' some- times : and I am capable of being childishly ' in earnest ' about novels, and straws, and such ' puppydogs' tails ' as my Flush's ! Also I write more letters than you do, . . I write in fact almost as you pay visits, . . and one has to 'make conversation' in turn, of course. But — give me something to vow by — whatever you meant in the ' Vivian Grey ' argument, you were wrong in it! and you never can be much more wrong — which is a comfortable reflection. Yet you leap very high at Dante's crown — or you do not leap, . . you simply extend your hand to it, and make a rustling among the laurel leaves, which is somewhat pro- phane. Dante's poetry only materials for the northern rhymers ! I must think of that . . if you please . . be- fore I agree with you. Dante's poetry seems to coma down in hail, rather than in rain — but count me the drops congealed in one hailstone ! Oh ! the ' Flight of the Duch- ess *■ — do let us hear more of her ! Are you (I wonder) . . . not a ' self-flatterer, ' . . but . . a flatterer. Ever yours, E. B. B. 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 55 B. B. to E. B. B. Saturday Morning. [Post-mark, May 3, 1845.] Now shall you see what you shall see — here shall be 'sound speech not to be reproved,' — for this morning you are to know that the soul of me has it all her own way, dear Miss Barrett, this green cool nine-in-the-morning time for my chestnut tree over there, and for me who only coaxed my good-natured — (really) — body up, after its three-hours night-rest on condition it should lounge, or creep about, incognito and without consequences — and so it shall, all but my right-hand which is half-spirit and 'cuts ' its poor relation, and passes itself off for somebody (that is, some soul) and is doubly active and ready on such occasions — Now I shall tell you all about it, first what last letter meant, and then more. You are to know, then, that for some reason, that looked like an instinct, I thought I ought not to send shaft on shaft, letter-plague on letter, with such an uninterrupted clanging . . that I ought to wait, say a week at least having killed all your mules for you, before I shot down your dogs — but not being exactly Phoibos Apollon, you are to know further that when I did think I might go modestly on, . . a>(j.<>t, let me get out of this slough of a simile, never mind with what dislocation of ancles ! Plainly, from waiting and turning my eyes away (not from you, but from you in your special capacity of being ivritten-to, not spoken-to) when I turned again you had grown formidable somehow — though that's not the word, — nor are you the person, either, — it was my fortune, my privilege of being your friend this one way, that it seemed a shame for me to make no better use of than tak- ing it up with talk about books and I don't know what. Write what I will, you would read for once, I think — well, then, — what I shall write shall be— something on this book, and the other book, and my own books, and Mary Howitt's books, and at the end of it — good bye, and I hope 56 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [May 3 here is a quarter of an hour rationally spent. So the thought of what I should find in my heart to say, and the contrast with what I suppose I ought to say . . all these things are against me. But this is very foolish, all the same, I need not be told — and is part and parcel of an older — indeed primitive body of mine, which I shall never wholly get rid of, of desiring to do nothing when I cannot do all; seeing nothing, getting, enjoying nothing, where there is no seeing and getting and enjoying wholly — and in this case, moreover, you are you, and know something about me, if not much, and have read Bos on the art of supplying Ellipses, and (after, particularly, I have con- fessed all this, why and how it has been) you will subaudire when I pull out my Mediseval-Gothic-Architectural-Manu- script (so it was, I remember now) and instruct you about corbeils and ogives . . though, after all, it was none of Vivian's doing, that, — all the uncle kind of man's, which I never professed to be. Now you see how I came to say some nonsense (I very vaguely think ivhat) about Dante — some desperate splash I know I made for the beginning of my picture, as when a painter at his wits' end and hunger's beginning says 'Here shall the figure's hand be' — and spots that down, meaning to reach it naturally from the other end of his canvas, — and leaving off tired, there you see the spectral disjoined thing, and nothing between it and rationality. I intended to shade down and soften off and put in and leave out, and, before I had done, bring Italian Poets round to their old place again in my heart, giving new praise if I took old, — anyhow Dante is out of it all, as who knows but I, with all of him in my head and heart? But they do fret one, those tantalizing creatures, of fine passionate class, with such capabilities, and such a facility of being made pure mind of. And the special in- stance that vexed me, was that a man of sands and dog- roses and white rock and green sea-water just under, should come to Italy where my heart lives, and discover the sights and sounds . . certainly discover them. And so do all 1845] AND ELIZABETH BAEEETT 57 ' Northern writers ; for take up handf uls of sonetti, rime, poemetti, doings of those who never did anything else, — and try and make out, for yourself, what . . say, what flowers they tread on, or trees they walk under, — as you might bid them, those tree and flower loving creatures, pick out of our North poetry a notion of what our daisies and harebells and furze bushes and brambles are — ' Odorosi fioretti, rose porporine, bianchissimi gigli. ' And which of you eternal triflers was it called yourself ' Shelley ' and so told me years ago that in the mountains it was a feast When one should find those globes of deep red gold — Which in the woods the strawberry-tree doth bear, Suspended in their emerald atmosphere. so that when my Uncle walked into a sorb-tree, not to tum- ble sheer over Monte Calvano, and I felt the fruit against my face, the little ragged bare-legged guide fairly laughed at my knowing them so well — ' Niursi — sorbi ! ' No, no, — does not all Naples-bay and half Sicily, shore and inland, come flocking once a year to the Piedigrotta fete only to see the blessed King's Yolanti, or livery servants all in their best; as though heaven opened; and would not I en- gage to bring the whole of the Piano (of Sorrento) in like- ness to a red velvet dressing gown properly spangled over, before the priest that held it out on a pole had even begun his story of how Noah's son Shem, the founder of Sorrento, threw it off to swim thither, as the world knows he did? Oh, it makes one's soul angry, so enough of it. But never enough of telling you — bring all your sympathies, come with loosest sleeves and longest lace-lappets, and you and yours shall find 'elbow room,' oh, shall you not! For never did man, woman or child, Greek, Hebrew, or as Danish as our friend, like a thing, not to say love it, but I liked and loved it, one liking neutralizing the rebellious stir of its fellow, so that I don't go about now wanting the fixed stars before my time ; this world has not escaped me, thank God; and — what other people say is the best of it, 58 THE LETTEKS OF EOBEET BBOWNING [May 3 may not escape me after all, though until so very lately I made up my mind to do without it ; — perhaps, on that ac- count, and to make fair amends to other people, who, I have no right to say, complain without cause. I have been surprised, rather, with something not unlike illness of late ■ — I have had a constant pain in the head for these two months, which only very rough exercise gets rid of, and which stops my ' Luria ' and much besides. I thought I never could be unwell. Just now all of it is gone, thanks to polking all night and walking home by broad daylight to the surprise of the thrushes in the bush here. And do you know I said ' this must go, cannot mean to stay, so I will not tell Miss Barrett why this and this is not done,' — but I mean to tell you all, or more of the truth, because you call me ' flatterer, ' so that my eyes widened again ! I, and in what? And of whom, pray? not of you, at all events, — of whom then? Do tell me, because I want to stand with you— and am quite in earnest there. And ' The Flight of the Duchess, ' to leave nothing out, is only the beginning of a story written some time ago, and given to poor Hood in his emergency at a day's notice, — the true stuff and story is all to come, the ' Flight, ' and what you allude to is the mere introduction — but the Magazine has passed into other hands and I must put the rest in some ' Bell ' or other — it is one of my Dramatic Romances. So is a certain ' Saul ' I should like to show you one day — an ominous liking — for nobody ever sees what I do till it is printed. But as you do know the printed little part of me, I should not be sorry if, in justice, you knew all I have really done, — written in the portfolio there, — though that would be far enough from tJds me, that wishes to you now. I should like to write something in concert with you, how I would try ! I have read your letter through again. Does this clear up all the difficulty, and do you see that I never dreamed of ' reproaching you for dealing out one sort of cards to me and everybody else ' — but that . . why, 'that ' which I have, 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 59 I hope, said, so need not resay. I will tell you — Sydney Smith laughs somewhere at some Methodist or other whose wont was, on meeting an acquaintance in the street, to open at once on him with some enquiry after the state of his soul — Sydney knows better now, and sees that one might quite as wisely ask such questions as the price of Illinois stock or condition of glebe-laud, — and I could say such — 'could,' — the plague of it! So no more at present from your loving . . Or, let me tell you I am going to see Mr. Kenyon on the 12th inst. — that you do not tell me how you are, and that yet if you do not continue to improve in health . . I shall not see you — not — not — not — what • knots ' to untie ! Surely the wind that sets my chestnut- tree dancing, all its baby-cone-blossoms, green now, rocking like fairy castles on a hill in an earthquake, — that is South West, surely! God bless you, and me in that — and do write to me soon, and tell me who was the ' flatterer, ' and how he never was Tours It. B. E. B. B. to R. B. Monday — and Tuesday. [Post-mark, May 6, 1845.] So when wise people happen to be ill, they sit up till six o'clock in the morning and get up again at nine? Do tell me how Lurias can ever be made out of such ungodly imprudences. If the wind blows east or west, where can any remedy be, while such evil deeds are being committed? And what is to be the end of it? And what is the reasona- bleness of it in the meantime, when we all know that think- ing, dreaming, creating people like yourself, have two lives to bear instead of one, and therefore ought to sleep more than others, . . throwing over and buckling in that fold of death, to stroke the life-purple smoother. Tou have to live your own personal life, and also Luria's life — and therefore you should sleep for both. It is logical indeed — 60 THE LETTEES OF ROBERT BROWNING [May 6 and rational, . . which logic is not always . . and if I had ' the tongue of men and of angels, ' I would use it to persuade you. Polka, for the rest, may be good; but sleep is better. I think better of sleep than I ever did, now that she will not easily come near me except in a red hood of poppies. And besides, . . praise your 'good- natured body ' as you like, . . it is only a seeming good- nature ! Bodies bear malice in a terrible way, be very sure ! — appear mild and smiling for a few short years, and then . . out with a cold steel; and the soul has it, ' with a ven- geance, ' . . according to the phrase ! You will not persist, (will you?) in this experimental homicide. Or tell me if you will, that I may do some more tearing. It really, really is wrong. Exercise is one sort of rest and you feel relieved by it — 'and sleep is another : one being as neces- sary as the other. This is the first thing I have to say. The next is a question. What do you mean about your manuscripts . . about 'Saul' and the portfolio ? for I am afraid of hazard- ously supplying ellipses — and your ' Bos ' comes to /Sows £xl yX(haa-Q. y I get half bribed to silence by the very pleasure of fancying. But if it could be possible that you should mean to say you would show me . . . Can it be? or am I reading this 'Attic contraction ' quite the wrong way? You see I am afraid of the difference between flattering myself and being flattered; the fatal difference. And now will you understand that I should be too overjoyed to have revelations from the ' Portfolio, ' . . however incarnated with blots and pen-scratches, . . to be able to ask impu- dently of them now? Is that plain? It must be, . . at any rate, . . that if you would like to ' write something together ' with me, I should like it still better. I should like it for some ineffable reasons. And I should not like it a bit the less for the grand supply of jests it would administer to the critical Board of Trade, 1 [Aeschylus, Agamemnon 36 : ' An ox hath trodden on ray tongue' Greek proverb implying silence. ] 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 61 about visible darkness, multiplied by two, mounting into palpable obscure. We should not mind . . should we? you would not mind, if you bad got over certain other con- siderations deconsiderating to your coadjutor. Yes — but I dare not do it, . . I mean, think of it, . . just now, if ever : and I will tell you why in a Mediaeval-Gothic-archi- tectural manuscript. The only poet by profession (if I may say so) except yourself, with whom I ever had much intercourse even on paper, (if this is near to ' much ') has been Mr. Home. We approached each other on the point of one of Miss Mit- ford's annual editorships ; and ever since, he has had the habit of writing to me occasionally ; and when I was too ill to write at all, in my dreary Devonshire days, I was his debtor for various little kindnesses, . for which I continue his debtor. In my opinion he is a truehearted and gener- ous man. Do you not think so? Well — long and long ago, he asked me to write a drama with him on the Greek model ; that is, for me to write the choruses, and for him to do the dialogue. Just then it was quite doubtful in my own mind, and worse than doubtful, whether I ever should write again ; and the very doubtfulness made me speak my ' yes ' more readily. Then I was desired to make a subject, . . to conceive a plan ; and my plan was of a man, haunted by his own soul, . . (making her a separate personal Psyche, a dreadful, beautiful Psyche) — the man being haunted and terrified through all the turns of life by her. Did you ever feel afraid of your own soul, as I have doner I think it is a true wonder of our humanity — and fit subject enough for a wild lyrical drama. I should like to write it by myself at least, well enough. But with him I will not now. It was delayed . . delayed. He cut the plan up into scenes . . I mean into a list of scenes . . a sort of ground- map to work on — and there it lies. Nothing more was done. It all lies in one sheet — and I have offered to give up my copyright of idea in it — if he likes to use it alone — or I should not object to work it out alone on my own side, 62 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [May 6 since it comes from me : only I will not consent now to a double work in it. There are objections — none, be it well understood, in Mr. Home's disfavour — for I think of him as well at this moment, and the same in all essential points, as I ever did. He is a man of fine imagination, and is be- sides good and generous. In the course of our acquain- tance (on paper — for I never saw him) I never was angry with him except once; and then, /was quite wrong and had to confess it. But this is being too ' mediaeval. ' Only you will see from it that I am a little entangled on the sub- ject of compound works, and must look where I tread . . and you will understand (if you ever hear from Mr. Ken- yon or elsewhere that I am going to write a compound- poem with Mr. Home) how it ivas true, and isn't true any more. Yes — you are going to Mr. Kenyon's on the 12th — and yes — my brother and sister are going to meet you and your sister there one day to dinner. Shall I have courage to see you soon, I wonder ! If you ask me, I must ask myself. But oh, this make-believe May — it can't be May after all ! If a south-west wind sate in your chestnut tree, it was but for a few hours — the east wind ' came up this way ' by the earliest opportunity of succession. As the old ' mysteries ' showed ' Beelzebub with a bearde, ' even so has the east wind had a ' bearde ' of late, in a full growth of bristling exagger- ations — the English spring-winds have excelled themselves in evil this year; and I have not been down stairs yet. — But I am certainly stronger and better than I was — that is undeniable — and I shall be better still. You are not going away soon — are you? In the meantime you do not know what it is to be .. a little afraid of Paracelsus. So right about the Italians ! and the ' rose porporine ' which made me smile. How is the head? Ever yours, E. B. B. Is the ' Flight of the Duchess' in the portfolio? Of course you must ring the Bell. That poem has a strong 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARKETT 63 heart in it, to begin so strongly. Poor Hood! And all those thoughts fall mixed together. May God bless you. E. B. B. to B. B. Sunday — in the last hour of it. [Post-mark, May 12, 1845. J May I ask how the head is? just under the bag? Mr. Kenyon was here to-day and told me such bad news that I cannot sleep to-night (although I did think once of doing it) without asking such a question as this, dear Mr. Browning. Let me hear how you are — Will you? and let me hear (if I can) that it was prudence or some unchristian virtue of the sort, and not a dreary necessity, which made you put aside the engagement for Tuesday — for Monday. I had been thinking so of seeing you on Tuesday . . with my sister's eyes — for the first sight. And now if you have done killing the mules and the dogs, let me have a straight quick arrow for myself, if you please. Just a word, to say how you are. I ask for no more than a word, lest the writing should be hurtful to you. May God bless you always. Your friend, E. x>. -B. It. B. to E. B. B. Monday. [Post-mark, May 12, 1845.] My dear, own friend, I am quite well now, or next to it — but this is how it was, — I have gone out a great deal of late, and my head took to ringing such a literal alarum that I wondered what was to come of it ; and at last, a few evenings ago, as I was dressing for a dinner somewhere, I got really bad of a sudden, and kept at home to my friend's heartrending disappointment — Next morning I was no bet- ter — and it struck me that I should be really disappointing 64 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [May 12 dear kind Mr. Kenyon, and wasting his time, if that engage- ment, too, were broken with as little warning, — so I thought it best to forego all hopes of seeing him, at such a risk. And that done, I got rid of every other promise to pay visits for next week and next, and told everybody, with considerable dignity, that my London season was over for this year, as it assuredly is — and I shall be worried no more, and let walk in the garden, and go to bed at ten o'clock, and get done with what is most expedient to do, and my ' flesh shall come again like a little child's,' and one day, oh the day, I shall see you with my own, own eyes . . for, how little you understand me ; or rather, your self, — if you think I would dare see you, without your leave, that way ! Do you suppose that your power of giv- ing and refusing ends when you have shut your room- door? Did I not tell you I turned down another street, even, the other day, and why not down your's? And often as I see Mr. Kenyon, have I ever dreamed of asking any but the merest conventional questions about you; your health, and no more? I will answer your letter, the last one, to-morrow — I have said nothing of what I want to say. Ever yours Pi. 13. R, B, to E. B. B, Tuesday Morning. [Post-mark, May 13, 1845.] Did I thank you with any effect in the lines I sent yes- terday, dear Miss Barrett? I know I felt most thankful, and, of course, began reasoning myself into the impropriety of allowing a ' more ' or a * most ' in feelings of that sort towards you. I am thankful for you, all about you — as, do you not know? Thank you, from my soul. Now, let me never pass occasion of speaking well of Home, who deserves your opinion of him, — it is my own, too. — He has unmistakeable genius, and is a fine, honest, 1845] AND ELIZABETH BAKEETT 65 enthusiastic chivalrous fellow — it is the fashion to affect to sneer at him, of late, I think — the people he has praised fancying that they ' pose ' themselves sculpturesquely in playing the Greatly Indifferent, and the other kind shak- ing each other's hands in hysterical congratulations at having escaped such a dishonour : 1 feel grateful to him, I know, for his generous criticism, and glad and proud of in any way approaching such a man's standard of poetical height. And he might be a disappointed man too, — for the players trifled with and teased out his very nature, which has a strange aspiration for the horrible tin-and-lac- quer * crown ' they give one from their clouds (of smooth shaven deal done over blue) — and he don't give up the bad business yet, but thinks a ' small ' theatre would somehow not be a theatre, and an actor not quite an actor . . I for- get in what way, but the upshot is, he bates not a jot in that rouged, wigged, padded, empty headed, heartless tribe of grimacers that came and canted me ; not I, them ; a thing he cannot understand — so, I am not the one he would have picked out to praise, had he not been loyal. I know he admires your poetry properly. God help him, and send some great artist from the country, (who can read and write beside comprehending Shakspeare, and who s exasperates his H's ' when the feat is to be done) — to un- dertake the part of Cosmo, or Gregory, or what shall most soothe his spirit ! The subject of your play is tempting indeed — and reminds one of that wild Drama of Calderon's which frightened Shelley just before his death — also, of Fuseli's theory with reference to his own Picture of Mac- beth in the witches' cave . . wherein the apparition of the armed head from the cauldron is Macbeth' s own. ' If you ask me, I must ask myself ' — that is, when I am to see you — I will never ask you ! You do not know what I shall estimate that permission at, — nor do I, quite — but you do — do not you? know so much of me as to make my ' asking ' worse than a form — I do not * ask ' you to write to me — not directly ask, at least. Vol. I.— 5 66 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [May 18 I will tell you — I ask you not to see me so long as you are unwell, or mistrustful of — No, no, that is being too grand ! Do see me when you can, and let me not be only writing myself Yours It. 13. A kind, so kind, note from Mr. Kenyon came. We, I and my sister, are to go in June instead . . I shall go no- where till then ; I am nearly well — all save one little wheel Sostenuto in my head that keeps on its fa): \ That you are better I am most thankful. ' Next letter ' to say how you must help me with all my new Bomances and Lyrics, and Lays and Plays, and read them and heed them and end them and mend them ! E. B. B. to It. B. Thursday. [Post-mark, May 16, 1845.] But how 'mistrustfulness' ? And how ' that way ? ' What have I said or done, I, who am not apt to be mistrustful of anybody and should be a miraculous monster if I began with you ! What can I have said, I say to myself again and again. One thing, at any rate, I have done, ' that way ' or this way ! I have made what is vulgarly called a ' piece of work ' about little ; or seemed to make it. Forgive me. I am shy by nature : — and by position and experience, . . by having had my nerves shaken to excess, and by leading a life of such seclusion, . . by these things together and by others besides, I have appeared shy and ungrateful to you. Only not mistrustful. You could not mean to judge me so. Mistrustful people do not write as I write, surely ! for wasn't it a Richelieu or Mazarin (or who?) who said that with five lines from anyone's hand, he could take off his head for a corollary ? I think so. 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 67 Well ! — but this is to prove that I am not mistrustful, and to say, that if you care to come to see me you can come ; and that it is my gain (as I feel it to be) and not yours, whenever you do come. You will not talk of hav- ing come afterwards I know, because although I am ' fast bound ' to see one or two persons this summer (besides yourself, whom I receive of choice and willingly) I cannot admit visitors in a general way — and putting the question of health quite aside, it would be unbecoming to lie here on the sofa and make a company-show of an infirmity, and hold a beggar's hat for sympathy. I should blame it in another woman — and the sense of it has had its weight with me sometimes. For the rest, . . when you write ' that 7" do not know how you would value, &c. nor yourself quite, ' you touch very accurately on the truth, . . and so accurately in the last clause, that to read it, made me smile ' tant bien que mal.' Certainly you cannot 'quite kriow,' or know at all, whether the least straw of pleasure can go to you from knowing me otherwise than on this paper — and I, for my part, ' quite know ' my own honest impression, dear Mr. Browning, that none is likely to go to you. There is noth- ing to see in me ; nor to hear in me — I never learnt to talk as you do in London ; although I can admire that bright- ness of carved speech in Mr. Kenyon and others. If my poetry is worth anything to any eye, it is the flower of me. I have lived most and been most happy in it, and so it has all my colours ; the rest of me is nothing but a root, fit for the ground and the dark. And if I write all this egotism, . . it is for shame ; and because I feel ashamed of having made a fuss about what is not worth it ; and because you are extravagant in caring so for a permission, which will be nothing to you afterwards. Not that I am not touched by your caring so at all ! I am deeply touched now ; and presently, . . I shall understand. Come then. There will be truth and simplicity for you in any case; and a friend. And do not answer this — I do not write it as a fly 68 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [May 16 trap for compliments. Your spider would scorn me for it too much. Also, . . as to the how and when. You are not well now, and it cannot be good for you to do anything but be quiet and keep away that dreadful musical note in the head. I entreat you not to think of coming until that is all put to silence satisfactorily. When it is done, . . you must choose whether you would like best to come with Mr. Kenyon or to come alone — and if you would come alone, you must just tell me on what day, and I will see you on any day unless there should be an unforeseen obstacle, . . any day after two, or before six. And my sister will bring you up stairs to me ; and we will talk ; or you will talk ; and you will try to be indulgent, and like me as well as you can. If, on the other hand, you would rather come with Mr. Kenyon, you must wait, I imagine, till June, — because he goes away on Monday and is not likely imme- diately to return — no, on Saturday, tomorrow. In the meantime, why I should be 'thanked,' is an abso- lute mystery to me — but I leave it ! You are generous and impetuous ; that, I can see and feel ; and so far from being of an inclination to mistrust you or distrust you, I do profess to have as much faith in your full, pure loyalty, as if I had known you personally as many years as I have appreciated your genius. Believe this of me — for it is spoken truly. In the matter of Shakespeare's 'poor players ' you are severe — and yet I was glad to hear you severe — it is a happy excess, I think. When men of intense reality, as all great poets must be, give their hearts to be trodden on and tied up with ribbons in turn, by men of masks, there will be torture if there is not desecration. Not that 1 know much of such things — but I have heard. Heard from Mr. Kenyon ; heard from Miss Mitf ord ; who however is pas- sionately fond of the theatre as a writer's medium — not at all, from Mr. Home himself, . . except what he has printed on the subject. 1845] AND ELIZABETH BAEEETT 69 Yes — he has been infamously used on the point of the 1 New Spirit ' — only he should have been prepared for the infamy — it was leaping into a gulph, . . not to ' save the republic, ' but 'pour rire ' : it was not merely putting one's foot into a hornet's nest, but taking off a shoe and stocking to do it. And to think of Dickens being dissatisfied ! To think of Tennyson's friends grumbling ! — he himself did not, I hope and trust. For you, you certainly were not adequately treated — and above all, you were not placed with your peers in that chapter — but that there was an intention to do you justice, and that there is a righteous apprecia- tion of you in the writer, I know and am sure, — and that you should be sensible to this, is only what I should know and be sure of you. Mr. Home is quite above the narrow, vicious, hateful jealousy of contemporaries, which we hear reproached, too justly sometimes, on men of letters. I go on writing as if I were not going to see you — soon perhaps. Remember that the how and the when rest with you — except that it cannot be before next week at the soon- est. You are to decide. Always your friend, E. 13. J3. R B. to E. B. B. Friday Night. [Post-mark, May 17, 1845.] My friend is not c mistrustful ' of me, no, because she don't fear I shall make mainprize of the stray cloaks and umbrellas down-stairs, or turn an article for ' Colburn's ' on her sayings and doings up stairs, — but spite of that, she does mistrust . . so mistrust my common sense, — nay, uncommon and dramatic-poet's sense, if I am put on as- serting it ! — all which pieces of mistrust I could detect, and catch struggling, and pin to death in a moment, and put a label in, with name, genus and species, just like a horrible entomologist; only I won't, because the first visit of the Northwind will carry the whole tribe into the Red Sea* — 70 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [May 17 and those horns and tails and scalewings are best forgotten altogether. And now will I say a cutting thing and have done. Have I trusted my friend so, — or said even to my- self, much less to her, she is even as — ' Mr. Simpson ' who desire th the honour of the acquaintance of Mr. B. whose admirable works have long been his, Simpson's, especial solace in private — and who accordingly is led to that per- sonage by a mutual friend — Simpson blushing as only ador- able ingenuousness can, and twisting the brim of his hat like a sailor giving evidence. Whereupon Mr. B. begin- neth by remarking that the rooms are growing hot — or that he supposes Mr. S. has not heard if there will be another adjournment of the House to-night — whereupon Mr. S. looketh up all at once, brusheth the brim smooth again with his sleeve, and takes to his assurance once more, in some- thing of a huff, and after staying his five minutes out for decency's sake, noddeth familiarly an adieu, and spinning round on his heel ejaculateth mentally — ' Well, I did expect to see something different from that little yellow common- place man . . and, now I come to think, there ivas some precious trash in that book of his ' — Have i" said ' so will Miss Barrett ejaculate? ' Dear Miss Barrett, I thank you for the leave you give me, and for the infinite kindness of the way of giving it. I will call at 2 on Tuesday — not sooner, that you may have time to write should any adverse circumstances happen . . not that they need inconvenience you, because . . what I want particularly to tell you for now and hereafter — do not mind my coming in the least, but — should you be unwell, for instance, — just send or leave word, and I will come again, and again, and again — my time is of no importance, and I have acquaintances thick in the vicinity. Now if I do not seem grateful enough to you, am I so much to blame? You see it is high time you saiv me, for I have clearly written myself out ! Ever yours, R. B. 1845] AND ELIZABETH BAKEETT 71 K B. B. to R. B. Saturday. [Post-mark, May 17, 1845.] I shall be ready on Tuesday I hope, but I hate and pro- test against your horrible 'entomology.' Beginning to explain, would thrust me lower and lower down the circles of some sort of an ' Inferno ; ' only with my dying breath I would maintain that I never could, consciously or uncon- sciously, mean to distrust you ; or, the least in the world, to Simpsonize you. What I said, ... it was you that put it into my head to say it — for certainly, in my usual disinclination to receive visitors, such a feeling does not enter. There, now ! There, I am a whole ' giro ' lower ! Now, you will say perhaps that I distrust you, and nobody else ! So it is best to be silent, and bear all the 'cutting things ' with resignation ! that is certain. Still I must really say, under this dreadful incubus- charge of Simpsonism, . . that you, who know everything, or at least make awful guesses at everything in one's feel- ings and motives, and profess to be able to pin them down in a book of classified inscriptions, . . should have been able to understand better, or misunderstand less, in a mat- ter like this — Yes ! I think so. I think you should have made out the case in some such way as it was in nature — viz. that you had lashed yourself up to an exorbitant wish- ing to see me, . . (you who could see, any day, people who are a hundredfold and to all social purposes, my superiors !) because I was unfortunate enough to be shut up in a room and silly enough to make a fuss about opening the door ; and that I grew suddenly abashed by the consciousness of this. How different from a distrust of you ! how different ! Ah — if, after this day, you ever see any interpretable sign of distrustfulness in me, you may be 'cutting ' again, and I will not cry out. In the meantime here is a fact for your 'entomology.' I have not so much distrust, as will make a doubt, as will make a curiosity for next Tuesday. Not the simplest modification of curiosity enters into the state of 72 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [May 17 feeling with which I wait for Tuesday : — and if you are angry to hear me say so, . . why, you are more unjust than ever. (Let it be three instead of two — if the hour be as conve- nient to yourself. ) Before you come, try to forgive me for my c infinite kindness ' in the manner of consenting to see you. Is it ' the cruellest cut of all ' when you talk of infinite kind- ness, yet attribute such villainy to me? Well! but we are friends till Tuesday — and after perhaps. Ever yours, E. B. B. If on Tuesday you should be not well, pray do not come — Now, that is my request to your kindness. 1 B. B. to E. B. B. Tuesday Evening. [Post-mark, May 21, 1845.] I trust to you for a true account of how you are — if tired, if not tired, if I did wrong in any thing, — or, if you please, right in any thing — (only, not one more word about my ' kindness, ' which, to get done with, I will grant is ex- ceptive) — but, let us so arrange matters if possible, — and why should it not be — that my great happiness, such as it will be if I see you, as this morning, from time to time, may be obtained at the cost of as little inconvenience to you as we can contrive. For an instance — just what strikes me — they all say here I speak very loud — (a trick caught from having often to talk with a deaf relative of mine) . And did I stay too long? I will tell you unhesitatingly of such 'corrigenda' — nay, I will again say, do not humiliate me — do not again, — by calling me ' kind ' in that way. I am proud and happy in your friendship — now and ever. May God bless you ! XV. B. 1 [Envelope endorsed by Robert Browning : — Tuesday, May 20, 1845, 3-4* p.m.] 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 73 E. B. B. to R. B. Wednesday Morning. [Post-mark, May 22, 1845. J Indeed there was nothing wrong — how could there be? And there was everything right — as how should there not be? And as for the ' load speaking,' I did not hear any — and, instead of being worse, I ought to be better for what was certainly (to speak it, or be silent of it,) happiness and honour to me yesterday. Which reminds me to observe that you are so restrict- ing our vocabulary, as to be ominous of silence in a full sense, presently. First, one word is not to be spoken — and then, another is not. And why? Why deny me the use of such words as have natural feelings belonging to them — and how can the use of such be ' humiliating ' to you ? If my heart were open to you, you could see noth- ing offensive to you in any thought there or trace of thought that has been there — but it is hard for you to un- derstand, with all your psychology (and to be reminded of it I have just been looking at the preface of some poems by some Mr. Gurney where he speaks of ' the reflective wisdom of a Wordsworth and the profound psychological utterances of a Browning ') it is hard for you to understand what my mental position is after the peculiar experience I have suffered, and what re' £p.ot v.aX mi 1 a sort of feeling is irrepressible from me to you, when, from the height of your brilliant happy sphere, you ask, as you did ask, for personal intercourse with me. What words but ' kindness ' . . but ' gratitude ' — but I will not in any case be tmkind and ungrateful, and do what is displeasing to you. And let us both leave the subject with the words — because we perceive in it from different points of view ; we stand on the black and white sides of the shield ; and there is no coming to a conclusion. But you will come really on Tuesday — and again, when 1 [' What have I to do with thee? '] 74 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [May 22 you like and can together — and it will not be more ' incon- venient ' to me to be pleased, I suppose, than it is to peo- ple in general — will it, do you think? Ah — how you mis- judge ! Why it must obviously and naturally be delightful to me to receive you here when you like to come, and it cannot be necessary for me to say so in set words — believe it of Tour friend, E. B. B. [Mr. Browning's letter, to which the following is in answer, was destroyed, see page 267 of the present volume.] K B. B. to R. B. Friday Evening. [Post-mark, May 24, 1845.] I intended to write to you last night and this morning, and could not, — you do not know what pain you give me in speaking so wildly. And if I disobey you, my dear friend, in speaking, (I for my part) of your wild speaking, I do it, not to displease you, but to be in my own eyes, and before God, a little more worthy, or less unworthy, of a generos- ity from which I recoil by instinct and at the first glance, yet conclusively; and because my silence would be the most disloyal of all means of expression, in reference to it. Listen to me then in this. You have said some intem- perate things . . . fancies, — which you will not say over again, nor unsay, but forget at once, and for ever, having said at all ; and which (so) will die out between you and one alone, like a misprint between you and the printer. And this you will do for my sake who am your friend (and you have none truer) — and this I ask, because it is a condition necessary to our future liberty of intercourse. You re- member — surely you do — that I am in the most exceptional of positions ; and that, just because of it, I am able to re- ceive you as I did on Tuesday; and that, for me to listen to ' unconscious exaggerations, ' is as unbecoming to the 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 75 humilities of my position, as unpropitious (which is of more consequence) to the prosperities of yours. Now, if there should be one word of answer attempted to this ; or of reference; I must not . . livillnotsee you again — and you will justify me later in your heart. So for my sake you will not say it — I think you will not — and spare me the sadness of having to break through an intercourse just as it is promising pleasure to me; to me who have so many sadnesses and so few pleasures. You will ! — and I need not be uneasy — and I shall owe you that tranquillity, as one gift of many. For, that I have much to receive from you in all the free gifts of thinking, teaching, master- spirits, . . that, I know ! — it is my own praise that I ap- preciate you, as none can more. Your influence and help in poetry will be full of good and gladness to me — for with many to love me in this house, there is no one to judge me . . noiv. Your friendship and sympathy will be dear and precious to me all my life, if you indeed leave them with me so long or so little. Your mistakes in me . . which 1 cannot mistake ( — and which have humbled me by too much honouring — ) I put away gently, and with grateful tears in my eyes ; because all that hail will beat down and spoil crowns, as well as ' blossoms. ' If I put off next Tuesday to the week after — I mean your visit, — shall you care much? For the relations I named to you, are to be in London next week ; and I am to see one of my aunts whom I love, and have not met since my great affliction — and it will all seem to come over again, and I shall be out of spirits and nerves. On Tues- day week you can bring a tomahawk and do the criticism, and I shall try to have my courage ready for it — Oh, you will do me so much good — and Mr. Kenyon calls me ' docile ' sometimes I assure you ; when he wants to flatter me out of being obstinate — and in good earnest, I believe I shall do everything you tell me. The ' Prometheus ' is done — but the monodrama is where it was — and the novel, not at all. But I think of some half promises half given, about 76 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [May 24 something I read for ' Saul ' — and the ' Flight of the Duch- ess ' — where is she? You are not displeased with me? no, that would be hail and lightning together — I do not write as I might, of some words of yours — but you know that I am not a stone, even if silent like one. And if in the wnsilence, I have said one word to vex you, pity me for having had to say it — and for the rest, may God bless you far beyond the reach of vexa- tion from my words or my deeds ! Your friend in grateful regard, E. B. 33. B. B. to E. B. B. Saturday Morning. [Post-mark, May 24, 1845.] Don't you remember I told you, once on a time, that you ' knew nothing of me' ? whereat you demurred — but I meant what I said, and knew it was so. To be grand in a simile, for every poor speck of a Vesuvius or a Stromboli in my microcosm there are huge layers of ice and pits of black cold water — and I make the most of my two or three fire-eyes, because I know by experience, alas, how these tend to extinction — and the ice grows and grows — still this last is true part of me, most characteristic part, test part perhaps, and I disown nothing — only, — when you talked of 'knoiving me ' ! Still, I am utterly unused, of these late years particularly, to dream of communicating anything about that to another person (all my writings are purely dramatic as I am always anxious to say) that when I make never so little an attempt, no wonder if I bungle notably — ' language, ' too, is an organ that never studded this heavy heavy head of mine. Will you not think me very brutal if I tell you I could almost smile at your misapprehension of what I meant to write? — Yet I wiU tell you, because it will undo the bad effect of my thoughtlessness, and at the same time exemplify the point I have all along been honestly earnest to set you right upon . . my real inferiority to 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 77 you ; just that and no more. I wrote to you, in an unwise moment, on the spur of being again ' thanked, ' and, un- wisely writing just as if thinking to myself, said what must have looked absurd enough as seen apart from the horrible counterbalancing never-to-be-written rest of me — by the side of which, could it be written and put before you, my note would sink to its proper and relative place, and become a mere ' thank you' for your good opinion — which I assure you is far too generous — for I really be- lieve you to be my superior in many respects, and feel un- comfortable till you see that, too — since I hope for your sympathy and assistance, and frankness is everything in such a case. ' I do assure you, that had you read my note, only having ' known ' so much of me as is implied in having inspected, for instance, the contents, merely, of that fatal and often-referred-to 'portfolio' there (Dii meliora piis /), you would see in it, (the note not the portfolio) the bland- est utterance ever mild gentleman gave birth to. But I for- got that one may make too much noise in a silent place by playing the few notes on the ■ ear-piercing fife ' which in Othello's regimental band might have been thumped into decent subordination by his 'spirit-stirring drum' — to say nothing of gong and ophicleide. Will you forgive me, on promise to remember for the future, and be more consider- ate? Not that you must too much despise me, neither; nor, of all things, apprehend I am attitudinizing a la By- ron, and giving you to understand unutterable somethings, longings for Lethe and all that — far from it ! I never com- mited murders, and sleep the soundest of sleeps — but ' the heart is desperately wicked,' that is true, and though I dare not say ' I know ' mine, yet I have had signal oppor- tunities, I who began life from the beginning, and can for- get nothing (but names, and the date of the battle of Water- loo), and have known good and wicked men and women, gentle and simple, shaking hands with Edmund Kean and Father Mathew, you and — Ottima ! Then, I had a certain faculty of self-consciousness, years and years ago, at which 78 THE LETTEES OF EOBEBT BEOWNING [May 24 • John Mill wondered, and which ought to be improved by this time, if constant use helps at all — and, meaning, on the whole, to be a Poet, if not the Poet . . for I am vain and ambitious some nights, — I do myself justice, and dare call things by their names to myself, and say boldly, this I love, this I hate, this I would do, this I would not do, under all kinds of circumstances, — and talking (thinking) in this style to myself, and beginning, however tremblingly, in spite of conviction, to write in this style for myself — on the top of the desk which contains my ' Songs of the Poets — no. 1 M.P.', I wrote, — what you now forgive, I know! Because I am, from my heart, sorry that by a foolish fit of inconsideration I should have given pain for a minute to you, towards whom, on every account, I would rather soften and ' sleeken every word as to a bird ' . . (and, not such a bird as my black self that go screeching about the world for ' dead horse ' — corvus (picus) — mirandola !) I, too, who have been at such pains to acquire the reputation I enjoy in the world, — (ask Mr. Kenyon,) and who dine, and wine, and dance and enhance the company's pleasure till they make me ill and I keep house, as of late : Mr. Kenyon, (for I only quote where you may verify if you please) he says my common sense strikes him, and its contrast with my muddy metaphysical poetry ! And so it shall strike you — for though I am glad that, since you did misunderstand me, you said so, and have given me an opportunity of doing by another way what I wished to do in that, — yet, if you had 7iot alluded to my writing, as I meant you should not, you would have certainly understood something of its drift when you found me next Tuesday precisely the same quiet (no, for I feel I speak too loudly, in spite of your kind dis- claimer, but — ) the same mild man-about-town you were gracious to, the other morning — for, indeed, my own way of worldly life is marked out long ago, as precisely as yours can be, and I am set going with a hand, winker-wise, on each side of my head,- and a directing finger before my eyes, to say nothing of an instinctive dread I have that a 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 79 certain whip-lash is vibrating somewhere in the neighbour- hood in playful readiness ! So ' I hope here be proofs, ' Dogberry's satisfaction that, first, I am but a very poor creature compared to you and entitled by my wants to look up to you, — all I meant to say from the first of the first — and that, next, I shall be too much punished if, for this piece of mere inconsideration, you deprive me, more or less, or sooner or later, of the pleasure of seeing you, — a little over boisterous gratitude for which, perhaps, caused all the mischief ! The reasons you give for deferring my visits next week are too cogent for me to dispute — that is too true — and, being now and henceforward ' on my good behaviour,' I will at once cheerfully submit to them, if needs must — but should your mere kindness and fore- thought, as I half suspect, have induced you to take such a step, you will now smile with me, at this new and very unnecessary addition to the ' fears of me ' I have got so triumphantly over in your case ! Wise man, was I not, to clench my first favourable impression so adroitly . . like a recent Cambridge worthy, my sister heard of; who, being on his theological (or rather, scripture-historical) exami- nation, was asked by the Tutor, who wished to let him off easily, 'who was the first King of Israel?' — 'Saul,' an- swered the trembling youth. ' Good ! ' nodded approvingly the Tutor. ' Otherwise called Paul, ' subjoined the youth in his elation ! Now I have begged pardon, and blushingly assured you that was only a slip of the tongue, and that I did really mean all the while, (Paul or no Paul), the veri- table son of Kish, he that owned the asses, and found lis- tening to the harp the best of all things for an evil spirit ! Pray write me a line to say, ' Oh . . if that's all ! ' and re- member me for good (which is very compatible with a mo- ment's stupidity) and let me not for one fault, (and that the only one that shall be) , lose any pleasure . . for your friendship I am sure I have not lost — God bless you, my dear friend! R. Browning. 80 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [May 24 And by the way, will it not be better, as co-operating with you more effectually in your kind promise to forget the ' printer's error ' in my blotted proof, to send me back that same 'proof,' if you have not inflicted proper and summary justice on it? When Mephistopheles last came to see us in this world outside here, he counselled sundry of us ' never to write a letter, — and never to burn one ' — do you know that? But I never mind what I am told! Se- riously, I am ashamed . . I shall next ask a servant for my paste in the - high fantastical ' style of my own ' Luria.' E. B. B. to B. B. Sunday [May 25, 1845.] I owe you the most humble of apologies dear Mr. Browning, for having spent so much solemnity on so sim- ple a matter, and I hasten to pay it; confessing at the same time (as why should I not?) that I am quite as much ashamed of myself as I ought to be, which is not a little. You will find it difficult to believe me perhaps when I as- sure you that I never made such a mistake (I mean of over- seriousness to indefinite compliments), no, never in my life before — indeed my sisters have often jested with me (in matters of which they were cognizant) on my supernatural indifference to the superlative degree in general, as if it meant nothing in grammar. I usually know well that ' boots ' may be called for in this world of ours, just as you called for your's; and that to bring 'Bootes,' were the vilest of mal-a-pro-pos-ities. Also, I should have understood ' boots ' where you wrote it, in the letter in question ; if it had not been for the relation of two things in it — and now I perfectly seem to see howl mistook that relation; {'seem to see ; ' because I have not looked into the letter again since your last night's commentary, and will not — ) inasmuch as I have observed before in my own mind, that a good deal of what is called obscurity in you, arises from a habit of 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 81 very subtle association; so subtle, that you are probably unconscious of it, . . and the effect of which is to throw together on the same level and in the same light, things of likeness and unlikeness — till the reader grows confused as I did, and takes one for another. I may say however, in a poor justice to myself, that I wrote what I wrote so un- fortunately, through reverence for you, and not at all from vanity on my own account . . although I do feel palpably while I write these words here and now, that I might as well leave them unwritten; for that no man of the world who ever lived in the world (not even you) could be expected to believe them, though said, sung, and sworn. For the rest, it is scarcely an apposite moment for you to talk, even ' dramatically, ' of my ' superiority ' to you, . . unless you mean, which perhaps you do mean, my superi- ority in simplicity — and, verily, to some of the ' adorable ingenuousness, ' sacred to the shade of Simpson, I may put in a modest claim, . . 'and have my claim allowed.' 'Pray do not mock me ' I quote again from your Shakespeare to you who are a dramatic poet; . and I will admit anything that you like, (being humble just now) — even that I did not Imoiv you. I was certainly innocent of the knowledge of the ' ice and cold water ' you introduce me to, and am only just shaking my head, as Flush would, after a first wholesome plunge. Well — if I do not know you, I shall learn, I suppose, in time. I am ready to try humbly to learn — and I may perhaps — if you are not done in San- scrit, which is too hard for me, . . . notwithstanding that I had the pleasure yesterday to hear, from America, of my profound skill in *' various languages less known than He- brew ' ! — a liberal paraphrase on Mr. Home's large fancies on the like subject, and a satisfactory reputation in itself — as long as it is not necessary to deserve it. So I here enclose to you your letter back again, as you wisely desire ; although you never could doubt, I hope, for a moment, of its safety with me in the completest of senses : and then, from the heights of my superior . . stultity, and other Vol. I. —6 82 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [May 25 qualities of the like order, . . I venture to advise you . . however (to speak of the letter critically, and as the dra- matic composition it is) it is to be admitted to be very beau- tiful, and well worthy of the rest of its kin in the portfolio, . . ' Lays of the Poets, ' or otherwise, ... I venture to advise you to burn it at once. And then, my dear friend, I ask you (having some claim) to burn at the same time the letter I was fortunate enough to write to you on Friday, and this present one — don't send them back to me; I hate to have letters sent back — but burn them for me and never mind Mephistopheles. After which friendly turn, you will do me the one last kindness of forgetting all this exquisite nonsense, and of refraining from mentioning it, by breath or pen, to me or another. Now I trust you so far : — you will put it with the date of the battle of Waterloo — and I, with every date in chronology ; seeing that I can remember none of them. And we will shuffle the cards, and take patience, and begin the game again, if you please— and I shall bear in mind that you are a dramatic poet, which is not the same thing, by any means, with us of the primitive sim- plicities, who don't tread on cothurns nor shift the mask in the scene. And I will reverence you both as ' a poet ' and as ' the poet ' ; because it is no false ' ambition, ' but a right you have — and one which those who live longest, will see justified to the uttermost. . In the meantime I need not ask Mr. Kenyon if you have any sense, because I have no doubt that you have quite sense enough — and even if I had a doubt, I shall prefer judging for myself without interpo- sition ; which I can do, you know, as long as you like to come and see me. And you can come this week if you do like it — because our relations don't come till the end of it, it appears— not that I made a pretence 'out of kindness ' — pray don't judge me so outrageously — but if you like to come . . not on Tuesday . . but on Wednesday at three o'clock, I shall be very glad to see you; and I, for one, shall have forgotten everj^thing by that time ; being quick at forgetting my own faults usually. If Wednesday does 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 83 not suit you, I am not sure that I can see you this week — but it depends on circumstances. Only don't think your- self obliged to come on Wednesday. You know I began by entreating you to be open and sincere with me — and no more — I require no ' sleekening of every word. ' I love the truth and can bear it — -whether in word or deed — and those who have known me longest would tell you so fullest. Well! — May God bless you. We shall know each other some day perhaps — and I am Always and faithfully your friend, E. B. B. R. B. to E. B. B. [Post-mark, May 26, 1845.] Nay — I must have last word — as all people in the wrong desire to have — and then, no more of the subject. You said I had given you great pain — so long as I stop that, think anything of me you choose or can ! But before your former letter came, I saw the pre-ordained uselessness of mine. Speaking is to some end, (apart from foolish self- relief, which, after all, I can do without) — and where there is no end — you see ! or, to finish characteristically — since the offering to cut off one's right-hand to save anybody a headache, is in vile taste, even for our melodramas, seeing that it was never yet believed in on the stage or off it, — ■ how much worse to really make the ugly chop, and after- wards come sheepishly in, one's arm in a black sling, and find that the delectable gift had changed aching to nausea ! There ! And now, ' exit, prompt-side, nearest door, Luria ' — and enter B.B. — next Wednesday, — as boldly as he sus- pects most people do just after they have been soundly frightened ! I shall be most happy to see you on the day and at the hour you mention. God bless you, my dear friend, R. B. 84 THE LETTEKS OF KOBEKT BKOWNING [May 2? K B. B. to R. B. Monday Morning. [Post-mark, May 27, 1845.] You will think me the most changeable of all the changeable; but indeed it is not my fault that I cannot, as I wished, receive you on Wednesday. There was a letter this morning ; and our friends not only come to London but come to this house on Tuesday (to-morrow) to pass two or three days, until they settle in an hotel for the rest of the season. Therefore you see, it is doubtful whether the two days may not be three, and the three days four; but if they go away in time, and if Saturday should suit you, I will let you know by a word; and you can answer by a yea or nay. While they are in the house, I must give them what time I can — and indeed, it is something to dread altogether. Tuesday. I send you the note I had begun before receiving yours of last night, and also a fragment 1 from Mrs. Hedley's herein enclosed, a full and complete certificate, . . that you may know . . quite knoiv, . . what the real and only reason of the obstacle to Wednesday is. On Saturday per- haps, or on Monday more certainly, there is likely to be no opposition, . . at least not on the ' cote gauche ' (my side !) to our meeting — but I will let you know more. For the rest, we have both been a little unlucky, there's no denying, in overcoming the embarrassments of a first acquaintance — but suffer me to say as one other last word, (and quite, quite the last this time!) in case there should have been anything approaching, however remotely, to a distrustful or unkind tone in what I wrote on Sunday, (and I have a sort of consciousness that in the process of my 1 [ . . . me on Tuesday, or Wednesday? if on Tuesday, I shall come by the three o'clock train ; if on Wednesday, early in the morning, as I shall be anxious to secure rooms . . so that your Uncle and Arabel may come up on Thursday], 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 85 self-scorning I was not in the most sabbatical of moods perhaps — ) that I do recall and abjure it, and from my heart entreat your pardon for it, and profess, notwith- standing it, neither to ' choose ' nor ' to be able ' to think otherwise of you than I have done, . . as of one most gen- erous and most loyal; for that if I chose, I could not; and that if I could, I should not choose. Ever and gratefully your friend, E. B. B. — And now we shall hear of ' Luria,' shall we not? and much besides. And Miss Mitford has sent me the most high comical of letters to read, addressed to her by ' B. B. Haydon historical painter ' which has made me quite laugh ; and would make you ; expressing his righteous in- dignation at the 'great fact ' and gross impropriety of any man who has ' thoughts too deep for tears ' agreeing to wear a ' bag wig ' . . the case of poor Wordsworth's going to court, you know. — Mr. Ha} 7 don being infinitely serious all the time, and yet holding the doctrine of the divine right of princes in his left hand. How is your head? may I be hoping the pest for it? May God bless you. M. B. to E. B. B. [Post-mark, May 28, 1845.] Saturday, Monday, as you shall appoint — no need to say that, or my thanks — but this note troubles you, out of my bounden duty to help you, or Miss Mitford, to make the Painter run violently down a steep place into the sea, if that will amuse you, by further informing him, what I know on the best authority, that Wordsworth's ' bag- wig,' or at least, the more important of his court-habiliments, were considerately furnished for the nonce by Mr. Rogers from his own wardrobe, to the manifest advantage of the Laureate's pocket, but more problematic improvement of his person, when one thinks on the astounding difference 86 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [May 28 of ' build ' in the two Poets : — the fact should be put on record, if only as serving to render less chimerical a prom- ise sometimes figuring in the columns of provincial news- papers — that the two apprentices, some grocer or other ad- vertises for, will be ' boarded and clothed like one of the family.' May not your unfinished (really good) head of the great man have been happily kept waiting for the body which can now be added on, with all this picturesqueness of circumstances. Precept on precept . . but then, line upon line, is allowed by as good authority, and may I not draw my confirming black line after yours, yet not break pledge? I am most grateful to you for doing me justice — doing yourself your own judgment, justice, since even the play-wright of Theseus and the Amazon found it one of his hardest devices to ' write me a speech, lest the lady be frightened, wherein it shall be said that I, Pyramus, am not Pyramus, but &c. . B. K B. B. to B. B. Friday Morning. [Post-mark, June 7, 1845.] When I see all you have done for me in this ' Prome- theus, ' I feel more than half ashamed both of it and of me for using your time so, and forced to say in my own de- fence (not to you but myself) that I never thought of meaning to inflict such work on you who might be doing so much better things in the meantime both for me and for others — because, you see, it is not the mere reading of the MS. , but the ' comparing ' of the text, and the melancholy comparisons between the English and the Greek, . . . quite enough to turn you from your 7zou zpoizoo, 1 that I brought upon you ; and indeed I did not mean so much, nor so soon ! Yet as you have done it for me — for me who expected a few jottings down with a pencil and a general opinion; it is of course of the greatest value, besides the pleasure and pride which come of it ; and I must say of the translation, (before putting it aside for the nonce), that the circumstance of your paying it so much attention and seeing any good in it, is quite enough reward for the writer and quite enough motive for self-gratulation, if it were all 1 [Aeschylus, Prometheus 11. : 'trick of loving men,' see note 1, on p. 89 above] . 88 THE LETTERS OE ROBERT BROWNING [June 7 torn to fragments at this moment — which is a foolish thing to say because it is so obvious, and because you would know it if I said it or not. And while you were doing this for me, you thought it unkind of me not to write to you; yes, and you think me at this moment the very princess of apologies and excuses and depreciations and all the rest of the small family of distrust — or of hypocrisy . . who knows? Well! but you are wrong . . wrong . . to think so ; and you will let me say one word to show where you are wrong — not for you to controvert, . . . because it must relate to myself espe- cially, and lies beyond your cognizance, and is something which I must knoiv best after all. And it is, . . that you persist in putting me into a false position, with respect to Jlxing days and the like, and in making me feel somewhat as I did when I was a child, and Papa used to put me up on the chimney-piece and exhort me to stand up straight like a hero, which I did, straighter and straighter, and then suddenly ' was 'ware ' (as we say in the ballads) of the walls' growing alive behind me and extending two stony hands to push me down that frightful precipice to the rug, where the dog lay . . . dear old Havannah, . . and where he and I were likely to be dashed to pieces together and mix our uncanonised bones. Now my present false posi- tion . . which is not the chimney-piece's, . . is the neces- sity you provide for me in the shape of my having to name this day, or that day, . . and of your coming because I name it, and of my having to think and remember that you come because I name it. Through a weakness, perhaps, or morbidness, or one knows not how to define it, I cannot help being uncomfortable in having to do this, — it is im- possible. Not that I distrust you — you are the last in the world I could distrust : and then (although you may be sceptical) I am naturally given to trust . . to a fault . . as some say, or to a sin, as some reproach me:— and then again, if I were ever such a distruster, it could not be of you. But if you knew me — ! I will tell you ! if one of my 1845] AND ELIZABETH BABBETT 89 brothers omits coming to this room for two days, . . I never ask why it happened ! if my own father omits coming up stairs to say ' good night, ' I never say a word ; and not from indifference. Do try to make out these readings of me as a dixit Casaubonus ; and don't throw me down as a corrupt text, nor convict me for an infidel which I am not. On the contrary I am grateful and happy to believe that you like to come here; and even if you came here as a pure act of charity and pity to me, as long as you cJwse to come I should not be too proud to be grateful and happy still. I could not be proud to yon, and I hope you will not fancy such a possibility, which is the remotest of all. Tes, and I am anxious to ask you to be wholly generous and leave off such an interpreting philosophy as you made use of yesterday, and forgive me when I beg you to fix your own days for coming for the future. Will you? It is the same thing in one way. If you like to come really every week, there is no hindrance to it — you can do it — and the privilege and obligation remain equally mine : — and if you name a day for coming on any week, where there is an obstacle on my side, you will learn it from me in a mo- ment. Why I might as well charge you with distrusting me, because you persist in making me choose the days. And it is not for me to do it, but for you — I must feel that — and I cannot help chafing myself against the thought that for me to begin to fix days in this way, just because you have quick impulses (like all imaginative persons), and wish me to do it now, may bring me to the catastrophe of asking you to come when you would rather not, . . which, as you say truly, would not be an important vexa- tion to you ; but to me would be worse than vexation ; to me — and therefore I shrink from the very imagination of the possibility of such a thing, and ask you to bear with me and let it be as I prefer . . left to your own choice of the moment. And bear with me above all — because this shows no want of faith in you . . none . . but comes from a simple fact (with its ramifications) . . that you know 90 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [June 7 little of me personally yet, and that you guess, even, but very little of the influence of a peculiar experience over me and out of me ; and if I wanted a proof of this, we need not seek further than the very point of discussion, and the hard worldly thoughts you thought I was thinking of you yes- terday, — I, who thought not one of them! But I am so used to discern the correcting and ministering angels by the same footsteps on the ground, that it is not wonderful I should look down there at any approach of a fitia rasi? whatever to this personal me. Have I not been ground down to browns and blacks? and is it my fault if I am not green? Not that it is my complaint — I should not be justi- fied in complaining; I believe, as I told you, that there is more gladness than sadness in the world — that is, gener- ally : and if some natures have to be refined by the sun, and some by the furnace (the less genial ones) both means are to be recognised as good, . . however different in pleasurableness and painfulness, and though furnace-fire leaves scorched streaks upon the fruit. I assured you there was nothing I had any power of teaching you : and there is nothing, except grief ! — which I would not teach you, you know, if I had the occasion granted. It is a multitude of words about nothing at all, . . this — but I am like Mariana in the moated grange and sit lis- tening too often to the mouse in the wainscot. Be as for- bearing as you can — and believe how profoundly it touches me that you should care to come here at all, much more, so often ! and try to understand that if I did not write as you half asked, it was just because I failed at the moment to get up enough pomp and circumstance to write on pur- pose to certify the important fact of my being a little stronger or a little weaker on one particular morning. That I am always ready and rejoiced to write to you, you know perfectly well, and I have proved, by ' superfluity of naughtiness ' and prolixity through some twenty posts : — and this, and therefore, you will agree altogether to attrib- ute no more to me on these counts, and determine to read 1845] AND ELIZABETH BAERETT 91 me no more backwards with your Hebrew, putting in your own vowel points without my leave ! Shall it be so? Here is a letter grown from a note which it meant to be — and I have been interrupted in the midst of it, or it should have gone to you earlier. Let what I have said in it of myself pass unquestioned and unnoticed, because it is of me and not of you, . . and, if in any wise lunatical, all the talking and writing in the world will not put the implied moon into another quarter. Only be patient with me a little, . . and let us have a smooth ground for the poems which I am foreseeing the sight of with such pride and delight — Such pride and delight ! And one thing . . which is chief, though it seems to come last! . . you will have advice (will you not?) if that pain does not grow much better directly? It cannot be prudent or even safe to let a pain in the head go on so long, and no remedy be attempted for it, . . and you can- not be sure that it is a merely nervous pain and that it may not have consequences ; and this, quite apart from the con- sideration of suffering. So you will see some one with an opinion to give, and take it? Do, I beseech you. You will not say ' no ' ? Also . . if on Wednesday you should be less well than usual, you will come on Thursday instead, I hope, . . seeing that it must be right for you to be quiet and silent when you suffer so, and a journey into London can let you be neither. Otherwise, I hold to my day, . . Wednesday. And may God bless you my dear friend. Ever yours, E. B. B. You are right I see, nearly everywhere, if not quite everywhere in the criticisms — but of course I have not looked very closely — that is, I have read your papers but not in connection with a my side of the argument — but I shall lose the post after all. 92 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [June 7 H. B. to E. £. B. Saturday Morning, [Post-mark, June 7, 1845.] I ventured to hope this morning might bring me news of you — First East-winds on you, then myself, then those criticisms ! — I do assure you I am properly apprehensive. How are you? May I go on Wednesday without too much avOadia. Pray remember what I said and wrote, to the effect that my exceptions were, in almost every case, to the 'read- ing ' — not to your version of it : but I have not specified the particular ones — not written down the Greek, of my sug- gested translations — have I? And if you do not find them in the margin of your copy, how you must wonder ! Thus, in the last speech but one, of Hermes, I prefer Porson and Blomfield's si (tyS 1 aruyjbv n yaka iiaviwv • — to the old com- binations that include euTi>%y — though there is no MS. authority for emendation, it seems. But in what respect does Prometheus ' fare well, ' or ' better ' even, since the be- ginning? And is it not the old argument over again, that when a man fails he should repent of his ways? — And while thinking of Hermes, let me say that ' prj8( poi dmAa? roductive ground ; for, you see, . . ' quandje m' 'efface il iiy a pas grand maV And I am to be made to work very hard, am I? But you should remember that if I did as much writing as last summer, I should not be able to do much else, . . I mean, to go out and walk about . . for really I think I could manage to read your poems and write as I am writing now, with ever so much head-work of my own going on at the same time. But the bodily exercise is different, and I do confess that the novelty of living more in the outer life for the last few months than I have done for years before, make me idle and inclined to be idle — and everybody is idle sometimes — even you perhaps — are you not? For me, you know, I do carpet-work — ask Mrs. Jameson — and I never pretend to be in a perpetual motion of mental industry. Still it may not be quite as bad as you think: I have done some work since ' Prometheus ' — only it is nothing worth speaking of and not a part of the romance- poem which is to be some day if I live for it — lyrics for the most part, which lie written illegibly in pure Egyptian — oh, there is time enough, and too much perhaps ! and so let me be idle a little now, and enjoy your poems while I can. It is pure enjoyment and must be — but you do not know how much, or you would not talk as you do some- times . . so wide of any possible application. And do not talk again of what you would ' sacrifice ' for me. If you affect me by it, which is true, you cast me from you farther than ever in the next thought. TJiat is true. The poems . . yours . . which you left with me, — are full of various power and beauty and character, and you must let me have my own gladness from them in my own way. 1845] AND ELIZABETH BAEEETT 151 Now I must end this letter. Did you go to Chelsea and hear the divine philosophy? Tell me the truth ahvays . . will you? I mean such truths as may be painful to me though truths . . May God bless you, ever dear friend. E. B. B. B. B. to E. B. B. Friday Afternoon . [Post-mark, August 8, 1845.] Then there is one more thing 'off my mind ' : I thought it might be with you as with me — not remembering how different are the causes that operate against us ; different in kind as in degree: — so much reading hurts me, for instance, — whether the reading be light or heavy, fiction or fact, and so much writing, whether my own, such as you have seen, or the merest compliment-returning to the weary tribe that exact it of one. But your health — that before all ! . . as assuring all eventually . . and on the other ac- counts you must know ! Never, pray, pray, never lose one sunny day or propitious hour to ' go out or walk about. ' But do not surprise me, one of these mornings, by ' walk- ing ' up to me when I am introduced . . or I shall infal- libly, in spite of all the after repentance and begging par- don — I shall [words effaced]. So here you learn the first ' painful truth ' I have it in my power to tell you ! I sent you the last of our poor roses this morning — con- sidering that I fairly owed that kindness to them. Yes, I went to Chelsea and found dear Carlyle alone — his wife is in the country where he will join her as soon as his book's last sheet returns corrected and fit for press — which will be at the month's end about. He was all kind- ness and talked like his own self while he made me tea — and, afterward, brought chairs into the little yard, rather than garden, and smoked his pipe with apparent relish; at night he would walk as far as Vauxhall Bridge on my way home. 152 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [August 8 If I used the word ' sacrifice, ' you do well to object — I can imagine nothing ever to be done by me worthy such a name. God bless you, dearest friend — shall I hear from you before Tuesday ? Ever your own R. B. E. B. B. to R. B. Friday. [Post-mark, August 8, 1845.] It is very kind to send these flowers — too kind — why are they sent? and without one single word . . which is not too kind certainly. I looked down into the heart of the roses and turned the carnations over and over to the peril of their leaves, and in vain! Not a word do I deserve to-day, I suppose ! And yet if I don't, I don't deserve the flowers either. There should have been an equal justice done to my demerits, O Zeus with the scales ! After all I do thank you for these flowers — and they are beautiful— and they came just in a right current of time, just when I wanted them, or something like them — so I con- fess that humbly, and do thank^you, at last, rather as I ought to do. Only you ought not to give away all the flowers of your garden to me ; and your sister thinks so, be sure — if as silently as you sent them. Now I shall not write any more, not having been written to. What with the Wednesday's flowers and these, you may think how I in this room, look down on the gardens of Damascus, let your Jew ' say what he pleases of them — and the Wednes- day's flowers are as fresh and beautiful, I must explain, as the new ones. They were quite supererogatory . . the new ones . . in the sense of being flowers. Now, the sense of 1 [' R. Benjamin of Tudela ' added in Robert Browning's hand- writing.] 1845] AND ELIZABETH BAKRETT 153 what I am writing seems questionable, does it not? — at least, more so, than the nonsense of it. Not a word, even under the little blue flowers ! ! ! — E. B. B. B. B. to E. B. B. Sunday Afternoon. [Post-mark, August 11, 1845.] How good you are to the smallest thing I try and do — (to show I would please you for an instant if I could, rather than from any hope such poor efforts as I am restricted to, can please you or ought.) And that you should care for the note that was not there ! — But I was surprised by the summons to seal and deliver, since time and the carrier were peremptory — and so, I dared divine, almost, I should hear from you by our mid-day post — which happened — and the answer to that, you received on Friday night, did you not? I had to go to Holborn, of all places, — not to pluck strawberries in the Bishop's Garden like Richard Crouchback, but to get a book — and there I carried my note, thinking to expedite its delivery : this notelet of yours, quite as little in its kind as my blue flowers, — this came last evening — and here are my thanks, dear E. B. B. — dear friend. In the former note there is a phrase I must not forget to call on you to account for — that where it confesses to having done ' some work — only nothing worth speaking of. ' Just see, — will you be first and only compact-breaker? Nor misunderstand me here, please, . . as I said, I am quite rejoiced that you go out now, ' walk about ' now, and put off the writing that will follow thrice as abun- dantly, all because of the stopping to gather strength . . so I want no new word, not to say poem, not to say the romance-poem — let the ' finches in the shrubberies grow restless in the dark ' — I am inside with the lights and music : but what is done, is done, pas vrai ? And ' worth ' is, dear my friend, pardon me, not in your arbitration quite. 154 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [August 11 Let me tell you an odd thing that happened at Chor- ley's the other night. I must have mentioned to you that I forget my own verses so surely after they are once on paper, that I ought, without affectation, to mend them in- finitely better, able as I am to bring fresh eyes to bear on them — (when I say ' once on paper' that is just what I mean and no more, for after the sad revising begins they do leave their mark, distinctly or less so according to cir- cumstances). Well, Miss Cushman, the new American actress (clever and truthful-looking) was talking of a new novel by the Dane Andersen, he of the ' Improvisatore, ' which will reach us, it should seem, in translation, vid America — she had looked over two or three proofs of the work in the press, and Chorley was anxious to know some- thing about its character. The title, she said, was capital — ' Only a Fiddler ! ' — and she enlarged on that word, ' Only, ' and its significance, so put : and I quite agreed with her for several minutes, till first one reminiscence flitted to me, then another and at last I was obliged to stop my praises and say ' but, now I think of it, / seem to have written something with a similar title — nay, a play, I be- lieve — yes, and in five acts — c Only an Actress ' — and from that time, some two years or more ago to this, I have been every way relieved of it ' ! — And when I got home, next morning; I made a dark pocket in my russet horror of a portfolio give up its dead, and there fronted me ' Only a Player-girl ' (the real title) and the sayings and doings of her, and the others — such others ! So I made haste and just tore out one sample-page, being Scene the First, and sent it to our friend as earnest and proof I had not been purely dreaming, as might seem to be the case. And what makes me recall it now is, that it was Russian, and about a fair on the Neva, and booths and droshkies and fish-pies and so forth, with the Palaces in the back ground. And in Chorley's Athenceumoi yesterday you may read a paper of very simple moony stuff about the death of Alexander, and that Sir James Wylie I have seen at St. Petersburg 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 155 (where lie chose to mistake me for an Italian — ' M. l'ltalien ' he said another time, looking up from his cards) . . So I think to tell you. Now I may leave off — I shall see you start, on Tues- day — hear perhaps something definite about your travel- ling. Do you know, ' Consuelo ' wearies me — oh, wearies— and the fourth volume I have all but stopped at — there lie the three following, but who cares about Consuelo after that horrible evening with the Venetian scamp, (where he bullies her, and it does answer, after all she says) as we say ? And Albert wearies too — it seems all false, all writing — not the first part, though. And what easy work these nov- elists have of it ! a Dramatic poet has to make you love or admire his men and women, — they must do and say all that you are to see and hear — really do it in your face, say it in your ears, and it is wholly for you, in your power, to name, characterize and so praise or blame, what is so said and done . . if you don't perceive of yourself, there is no standing by, for the Author, and telling you. But with these novelists, a scrape of the pen — out blurting of a phrase, and the miracle is achieved — ' Consuelo possessed to perfection this and the other gift ' — what would you more? Or, to leave dear George Sand, pray think of Bul- wer's beginning a ' character ' by informing you that lone, or somebody in ' Pompeii, ' ' was endowed with perfect genius ' — £ genius ' ! What though the obliging informer might write his fingers off before he gave the pitifullest proof that the poorest spark of that same, that genius, had ever visited him ? lone has it ' perfectly ' — perfectly — and that is enough! Zeus with the scales? with the false weights ! And now — till Tuesday good bye, and be willing to get well as (letting me send porter instead of flowers — and beefsteaks too !) soon as may be ! and may God bless you, ever dear friend. R. B. 156 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [August 11 E. B. J5. to R. R. [Post-mark, August 11, 1845.] But if it l hurts ' you to read and write ever so little, why should I be asked to write . . for instance . . ' be- fore Tuesday? ' And I did mean to say before to-day, that I wish you never would write to me when you are not quite well, as once or twice you have done if not much of tener ; because there is not a necessity, . . and I do not choose that there should ever be, or seem a necessity, . . do you understand? And as a matter of personal preference, it is natural for me to like the silence that does not hurt you, better than the speech that does. And so, remember. And talking of what may ' hurt ' you and me, you would smile, as I have often done in the midst of my vexation, if you knew the persecution I have been subjected to by the people who call themselves (lucus a non lucendo) ' the fac- ulty,' and set themselves against the exercise of other peo- ple's faculties, as a sure way to death and destruction. The modesty and simplicity with which one's physicians tell one not to think or feel, just as they would tell one not to walk out in the dew, would be quite amusing, if it were not too tryingly stupid sometimes. I had a doctor once who thought he had done everything because he had car- ried the inkstand out of the room — ' now,' he said, ' you will have such a pulse to-morrow.' He gravely thought poetry a sort of disease — a sort of fungus of the brain — and held as a serious opinion, that nobody could be prop- erly well who exercised it as an art — which was true (he maintained) even of men — he had studied the physiology of poets, ' quotha ' — but that for women, it was a mortal malady and incompatible with any common show of health under any circumstances. And then came the damnatory clause in his experience . . that he had never known ' a system ' approaching mine in ' excitability ' . . except Miss Garrow's . . a young lady who wrote verses for Lady 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 157 Blessington's annuals . . and who was the only other fe- male rhymer he had had the misfortune of attending. And she was to die in two years, though she was dancing quad- rilles then (and has lived to do the same by the polka), and 1, of course, much sooner, if I did not ponder these things, and amend my ways, and take to reading ' a course of his- tory ' ! ! Indeed I do not exaggerate. And just so, for a long while I was persecuted and pestered . . vexed thor- oughly sometimes . . my own family, instructed to sing the burden out all day long — until the time when the sub- ject was suddenly changed by my heart being broken by that great stone that fell out of Heaven. Afterwards I was let do anything I could best . . which was very little, until last year — and the working, last year, did much for me in giving me stronger roots down into life, . . much. But think of that absurd reasoning that went before! — the niaiserie of it ! For, granting all the premises all round, it is not the utterance of a thought that can hurt anybody ; while only the utterance is dependent on the will ; and so, what can the taking away of an inkstand do? Those phy- sicians are such metaphysicians ! It's curious to listen to them. And it's wise to leave off listening: though I have met with excessive kindness among them, . . and do not refer to Dr. Chambers in any of this, of course. I am very glad you went to Chelsea — and it seemed finer afterwards, on purpose to make room for the divine philosophy. Which reminds me (the going to Chelsea) that my brother Henry confessed to me yesterday, with shame and confusion of face, to having mistaken and taken your umbrella for another belonging to a cousin of ours then in the house. He saw you . . without conjecturing, just at the moment, who you were. Do you conjecture sometimes that I live all alone here like Mariana in the moated Grange? It is not quite so — : but where there are many, as with us, every one is apt to follow his own de- vices — and my father is out all day and my brothers and sisters are in and out, and with too large a public of noisy 158 THE LETTERS OE ROBERT BROWNING [August 11 friends for me to bear, . . and I see them only at certain hours, . . except, of course, my sisters. And then as you have ' a reputation ' and are opined to talk generally in blank verse, it is not likely that there should be much irreverent rushing into this room when you are known to be in it. The flowers are ... so beautiful ! Indeed it was wrong, though, to send me the last. It was not just to the lawful possessors and enjoy ers of them. That it was kind to me I do not forget. You are too teachable a pupil in the art of obliterating — and omne ignotum pro terrifico . . and therefore I wont frighten you by walking to meet you for fear of being frightened myself. So goodbye until Tuesday. I ought not to make you read all this, I know, whether you like to read it or not: and I ought not to have written it, having no better reason than because I like to write on and on. You have better reasons for thinking me very weak — and I, too good ones for not being able to reproach you for that natural and necessary opinion. May God bless you my dearest friend. E. B. B. R. B. to E. B. B. Tuesday Evening. [Post-mark, August 13, 1845.] What can I say, or hope to say to you when I see what you do for me? This — for myself, (nothing for you /) — this, that I think the great, great good I get by your kindness strikes me less than that kindness. All is right, too — Come, I will have my fault-finding at last ! So you can decypher my utterest hieroglyphic? Now droop the eyes while I triumph: the plains cower, cower beneath the mountains their masters — and the Priests stomp over 1845] AND ELIZABETH BAKftETT 159 the clay ridges, (a palpable plagiarism from two lines of a legend that delighted my infancy, and now instruct my maturer years in pretty nearly all they boast of the semi-mythologic era referred to — ' In London town, when reigned King Lud, His lords went stomping thro' the mud ' — would all historic records were half as picturesque !) But you know, yes, you know you are too indulgent by far — and treat these roughnesses as if they were advanced to many a stage ! Meantime the pure gain is mine, and better, the kind generous spirit is mine, (mine to profit by) — and best — best — best, the dearest friend is mine, So be happy B. B. E. B. B. to R. B. [Post-mark, August 13, 1845.] Tes, I admit that it was stupid to read that word so wrong. I thought there was a mistake somewhere, but that it was yours, who had written one word, meaning to write another. ' Cower ' puts it all right of course. But is there an English word of a significance different from ■ stamp,' in ' stomp? ' Does not the old word King Lud's men stomped withal, claim identity with our 'stamping.' The a and o used to ' change about, ' you know, in the old English writers — see Chaucer for it. Still the ' stomp ' with the peculiar significance, is better of course than the ' stamp ' even with a rhyme ready for it, and I dare say you are justified in daring to put this old wine into the new bottle ; and we will drink to the health of the poem in it. It is ' Italy in England ' — isn't it? But I under- stand and understood perfectly, through it all, that it is unfinished, and in a rough state round the edges. I could not help seeing that, even if I were still blinder than when I read ' Lower ' for ' Cower. ' But do not, I ask of you, speak of my ' kindness ' . . my kindness ! — mine ! It is ' wasteful and ridiculous ex- 160 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWN [KG [August 13 cess ' and mis-application to use such words of me. And therefore, talking of ' compacts ' and the ' fas ' and ' nefas ' of them, I entreat you to know for the future that whatever I write of your poetry, if it isn't to be called ' imperti- nence,' isn't to be called ' kindness,' any more, . . a for- tiori, as people say when they are sure of an argument. Now, will you try to understand? And talking still of compacts, how and where did I break any compact? I do not see. It was very curious, the phenomenon about your ' Only a Player-Girl. ' What an un-godlike indifference to your creatures though — your worlds, breathed away from you like soap bubbles, and dropping and breaking into russet portfolios unobserved ! Only a god for the Epicurean, at best, can you be? That Miss Cushman went to Three Mile Cross the other day, and visited Miss Mitford, and pleased her a good deal, I fancied from what she said, . .- and with reason, from what you say. And ' Only a Fid- dler, ' as I forgot to tell you yesterday, is announced, you may see in any newspaper, as about to issue from the Eng- lish press by Mary Howitt's editorship. So we need not go to America for it. But if you complain of George Sand for want of art, how could you bear Andersen, who can see a thing under his eyes and place it under yours, and take a thought separately into his soul and express it insularly, but has no sort of instinct towards wholeness and unity ; and writes a book by putting so many pages together, . . just so ! — For the rest, there can be no disagreeing with you about the comparative difficulty of novel-writing and drama-writing. I disagree a little, lower down in your letter, because I could, not deny (in my own convictions) a certain proportion of genius to the author of ' Ernest Maltravers,' and ' Alice ' (did you ever read those books?), even if he had more impotently tried (supposing it to be possible) for the dramatic laurel. • In fact his poetry, dra- matic or otherwise, is ' nought ' ; but for the prose ro- mances, and for - Ernest Maltravers ' above all, I must lift 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 161 up my voice and cry. And I read the Athenceum about your Sir James Wylie who took you for an Italian . . Poi vi dird Signor, che ne f u causa Ch' avio fatto al scriver debita pausa. ' — Ever your E. B. B. R. S. to E. B. JB. Friday Morning. [Post-mark, August 15, 1845.] Do you know, dear friend, it is no good policy to stop up all the vents of my feeling, nor leave one for safety's sake, as you will do, let me caution you never so repeated- ly. I know, quite well enough, that your ' kindness ' is not so apparent, even, in this instance of correcting my verses, as in many other points — but on such points, you lift a finger to me and I am dumb. . . Am I not to be allowed a word here neither? I remember, in the first season of German Opera here, when • Fidelio's ' effects were going, going up to the gal- lery in order to get the best of the last chorus — get its oneness which you do- — and, while perched there an inch under the ceiling, I was amused with the enormous enthu- siasm of an elderly German (we thought, — I and a cousin of mine) — whose whole body broke out in billow, heaved and swayed in the perfection of his delight, hands, head, feet, all tossing and striving to utter what possessed him. Well — next week, we went again to the Opera, and again mounted at the proper time, but the crowd was greater, and our mild great faced white haired red cheeked German was not to be seen, not at first — for as the glory was at its full, my cousin twisted me round and made me see an arm, only an arm, all the body of its owner being amalgamated with a dense crowd on each side, before, and — not behind, because they, the crowd, occupied the last benches, over which we looked — and this arm waved and exulted as if ' for the dignity of the whole body,' — relieved it of its dangerous Vol. I.— 11 162 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [August 15 accumulation of repressed excitability. When the crowd broke up all the rest of the man disengaged itself by siow endeavours, and there stood our friend confessed — as we were sure ! — Now, you would have bade him keep his arm quiet? ' Lady Geraldine, you ivould ! ' I have read those novels — but I must keep that word of words, 'genius ' — for something different — ' talent ' will do here surely. There lies ' Consuelo ' — done with! I shall tell you frankly that it strikes me as precisely what in conventional language with the customary silliness is styled a woman's book, in its merits and defects, — and supremely timid in all the points where one wants, and has a right to expect, some fruit of all the pretence and George Sand^'swi. These are occasions when one does say, in the phrase of her school, ' que la Femme parle ! ' or what is better, let her act ! and how does Consuelo comfort herself on such an emergency? Why, she bravely lets the uninspired people throw down one by one their dearest prejudices at her feet, and then, like a very actress, picks them up, like so many flowers, returning them to the breast of the owners with a smile and a courtesy and trips off the stage with a glance at the Pit. Count Christian, Baron Frederic, Baroness — what is her name — all open their arms, and Consuelo will not consent to entail disgrace &c. &c. No, you say — she leaves them in order to solve the problem of her true feeling, whether she can really love Albert ; but remember that this is done, (that is, so much of it as ever is done, and as determines her to accept his hand at the very last) — this is solved sometime about the next morning — or earlier — I forget — and in the meantime, Albert gets that ' benefit of the doubt ' of which chapter the last informs you. As for the hesitation and self- examination on the matter of that Anzoleto — the writer is turning over the leaves of a wrong dictionary, seeking help from Psychology, and pretending to forget there is such a 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 163 thing as Physiology. Then, that horrible Porpora!— if George Sand gives him to a Consuelo for an absolute mas- ter, in consideration of his services specified, and is of opinion that they warrant his conduct, or at least, oblige submission to it, — then, I find her objections to the father- ly rule of Frederic perfectly impertinent — he having a few claims upon the gratitude of Prussia also, in his way, I believe ! If the strong ones will make the weak ones lead them — then, for Heaven's sake, let this dear old all-abused world keep on its course without these outcries and tear- ings of hair, and don't be for ever goading the Karls and other trodden-down creatures till they get their carbines in order (very rationally) to abate the nuisance — when you make the man a long speech against some enormity he is about to commit, and adjure and beseech and so forth, till he throws down the aforesaid carbine, falls on his knees, and lets the Frederic go quietly on his way to keep on kill- ing his thousands after the fashion that moved your pre- vious indignation. Now is that right, consequential — that is, inferential ; logically deduced, going straight to the end — manly ? The accessories are not the Principal, the adjuncts — the essence, nor the ornamental incidents the book's self, so what matters it if the portraits are admirable, the descrip- tions eloquent, (eloquent, there it is — that is her charac- teristic — what she has to speak, she speaks out, speaks volubly forth, too well, inasmuch as you say, advancing a step or two, ' And now speak as completely here ' — and she says nothing) — but all that, another could do, as others have done — but ' la femme qui parle ' — Ah, that, is this all? So I am not George Sand's — she teaches me nothing — I look to her for nothing. I am ever yours, dearest friend. How I write to you — page on page ! But Tuesday — who could wait till then ! Shall I not hear from you? God bless you ever R. B. 164 THE LETTEES OF EOBERT BROWNING [August 16 E. B. B. to R. B. Saturday. [Post-mark, August 16, 1845.] But what likeness is there between opposites ; and what has ' M. l'ltalien ' to do with the said ' elderly German ? ' See how little ! For to bring your case into point, some- body should have been playing on a Jew's harp for the whole of the orchestra; and the elderly German should have quoted something about ' Harp of Judah ' to the Ve- netian behind him! And there, you would have proved your analogy! — Because you see, my dear friend, it was not the expression, but the thing expressed, I cried out against — the exaggeration in your mind. I am sorry when I write what you do not like — but I have instincts and im- pulses too strong for me when you say things which put me into such a miserably false position in respect to you — as for instance, when in this very last letter (oh, I must tell you!) you talk of my 'correcting your verses ' ! My correcting your verses ! ! ! — Now is that a thing for you to say? — And do you really imagine that if I kept that hap- pily imagined phrase in my thoughts, I should be able to tell you one word of my impressions from your poetry, ever, ever again? Do you not see at once what a disquali- fying and paralysing phrase it must be, of simple necessity ? So it is 1 who have reason to complain, . . it appears to me, . . and by no means you — and in your ' second consi- deration ' you become aware of it, I do not at all doubt. As to ' Consuelo ' I agree with nearly all that you say of it — though George Sand, we are to remember, is greater than ' Consuelo, ' and not to be depreciated according to the defects of that book, nor classified as ' femme qui parle ' . . she who is man and woman together, . . judg- ing her by the standard of even that book in the nobler portions of it. For the inconsequency of much in the book, I admit it of course — and you will admit that it is the rarest of phenomena when men . . men of logic . . 1845] AND ELIZABETH BAERETT 165 follow their own opinions into their obvious results — no- body, you know, ever thinks of doing such a thing : to pur- sue one's own inferences is to rush in where angels . . per- haps . . do not fear to tread, . . but where there will not be much other company. So the want of practical logic shall be a human fault rather than a womanly one, if you please : and you must please also to remember that ■ Con- suelo ' is only ' half the orange; ' and that when you com- plain of its not being a whole one, you overlook that hand which is holding to you the ' Comtesse de Eudolstadt ' in three volumes ! Not that I, who have read the whole, pro- fess a full satisfaction about Albert and the rest — and Con- suelo is made to be happy by a mere clap-trap at last : and Mme. Dudevant has her specialities, — in which, other wom- en, I fancy, have neither part nor lot, . . even/iere/ — Alto- gether, the book is a sort of rambling ' Odyssey, ' a female ' Odyssey,' if you like, but full of beauty and nobleness, let the faults be where they may. And then, I like those long, long books, one can live away into . . leaving the world and above all oneself, quite at the end of the avenue of palms — quite out of sight and out of hearing ! — Oh, I have felt something like that so often — so often ! and you never felt it, and never will, I hope. But if Bulwer had written nothing but the ' Ernest Maltravers ' books, you would think perhaps more highly of him. Do you not think it possible now? It is his most impotent struggling into poetry, which sets about proving a negative of genius on him — that, which the Athenaeum praises as ' respectable attainment in various walks of lit- erature ' — ! like the Athenceum, isn't it? and worthy praise, to be administered by professed judges of art? What is to be expected of the public, when the teachers of the pub- lic teach so ? — When you come on Tuesday, do not forget the MS. if any is done — only don't let it be done so as to tire and hurt you — mind ! And goodbye until Tuesday, from E. B. B. 1.66 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROW2OTG [August 18 K B. B. to B. B. Sunday. [Post-mark, August 18, 1845.] I am going to propose to you to give up Tuesday, and to take your choice of two or three other days, say Friday, or Saturday, or to-morrow . . Monday. Mr. Kenyon was here to-day and talked of leaving London on Friday, and of visiting me again on ' Tuesday ' . . he said, . . but that is an uncertainty, and it may be Tuesday or Wednes- day or Thursday. So I thought (wrong or right) that out of the three remaining days you would not mind choosing one. And if you do choose the Monday, there will be no need to write — nor time indeed — ; but if the Friday or Saturday, I shall hear from you, perhaps. Above all things remember, my dear friend, that I shall not expect you to-morrow, except as by a bare possibility. In great haste, signed and sealed this Sunday evening by L. 13. Tj. B. B. to K B. B. Monday, 7 p.m. [Post-mark, August 19, 1845.] I this moment get your note — having been out since the early morning — and I must write just to catch the post. You are pure kindness and considerateness, no thanks to you! — (since you will have it so — ). I choose Friday, then, — but I shall hear from you before Thursday, I dare hope? I have all but passed your house to-day — with an Italian friend, from Eome, whom I must go about with a little on weariful sight seeing, so I shall earn Friday. Bless you H. B. 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT. 167 E. B. B. to R. B. Tuesday. [Post-mark, August 20, 1845.] I fancied it was just so — as I did not hear and did not see you on Monday. Not that you were expected particu- larly — but that you would have written your own negative, it appeared to me, by some post in the day, if you had re- ceived my note in time. It happened well too, altogether, as you have a friend with you, though Mr. Kenyon does not come, and will not come, I dare say ; for he spoke like a doubter at the moment ; and as this Tuesday wears on, I am not likely to have any visitors on it after all, and may as well, if the rain quite ceases, go and spend my solitude on the park a little. Flush wags his tail at that proposi- tion when I speak it loud out. And I am to write to you before Friday, and so, am writing, you see . . which I should not, should not have done if I had not been told ; because it is not my turn to write, . . did you think it was? Not a word of Malta! except from Mr. Kenyon who talked homilies of it last Sub day and wanted to speak them to Papa — but it would not do in any way — now especially — and in a little time there will be a decision for or against ; and I am afraid of both . . which is a happy state of prep- aration. Did I not tell you that early in the summer I did some translations for Miss Thomson's ' Classical Album,' from Bion and Theocritus, and Nonnus the author of that large (not great) poem in some forty books of the ' Diony- siaca ' . . and the paraphrases from Apuleius ? Well — I had a letter from her the other day, full of compunction and ejaculation, and declaring the fact that Mr. Burges had been correcting all the proofs of the poems; leaving out and emending generally, according to his own particular idea of the pattern in the mount — is it not amusing? I have been wicked enough to write in reply that it is happy for her and all readers . . sua si bona norint . . if during some half hour which otherwise might have been dedicated 168 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [August 20 by Mr. Burges to putting out the lights of Sophocles and his peers, he was satisfied with the humbler devastation of E. B. B. upon Nonnus. You know it is impossible to help being amused. This correcting is a mania with that man ! And then I, who wrote what I did from the ' Diony- siaca, ' with no respect for ' my author, ' and an arbitrary will to ' put the case ' of Bacchus and Ariadne as well as I could, for the sake of the art-illustrations, . . those sub- jects Miss Thomson sent me, . . and did it all with full liberty and persuasion of soul that nobody would think it worth while to compare English with Greek and refer me back to Nonnus and detect my wanderings from the text ! ! But the critic was not to be cheated so ! And I do not doubt that he has set me all ' to rights ' from beginning to end; and combed Ariadne's hair close to her cheeks for me. Have you known Nonnus, . . you who forget noth- ing? and have known everything, I think? For it is quite startling, I must tell you, quite startling and humiliating, to observe how you combine such large tracts of experi- ence of outer and inner life, of books and men, of the world and the arts of it; curious knowledge as well as general knowledge . . and deep thinking as well as wide acquisi- tion, . . and you, looking none the older for it all ! — yes, and being besides a man of genius and working your fac- ulty and not wasting yourself over a surface or away from an end. Dugald Stewart said that genius made naturally a lop-sided mind — did he not? He ought to have known you. And / who do . . a little . . (for I grow more loth than I was to assume the knowledge of you, my dear friend) — / do not mean to use that word ' humiliation ' in the sense of having felt the thing myself in any -painful way, . . because I never for a moment did, or could, you know, — never could . . never did . . except indeed when you have over praised me, which forced another personal feeling in. Otherwise it has always been quite pleasant to me to be ' startled and humiliated ' — and more so per- haps than to be startled and exalted, if I might choose. 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT. 169 Only I did not mean to write all this, though you told me to write to you. But the rain which keeps one in, gives one an example of pouring on . . and you must endure as you can or will. Also . . as you have a friend with you ' from Italy ' . . ' from Rome, ' and commended me for my ' kindness and considerateness ' in changing Tuesday to Friday . . (wasn't it? . . ) shall I still be more consider- ate and put off the visit-day to next week? mind, you let it be as you like it best to be — I mean, as is most conve- nient ' for the nonce ' to you and your friend — because all days are equal, as to that matter of convenience, to your other friend of this ilk, E. B. B. R. B. to E. B. B. Wednesday Morning. [Post-mark, August 20, 1845.] Mauvaise, mauvaise, mauvaise, you know as I know, just as much, that your ' kindness and considerateness ' consisted, not in putting off Tuesday for another day, but in caring for my coming at all; for my coming and being told at the door that you were engaged, and I might call another time ! And you are not, not my ' other friend, ' any more than this head of mine is my other head, seeing that I have got a violin which has a head too ! All which, beware lest you get fully told in the letter I will write this evening, when I have done with my Romans — who are, it so happens, here at this minute; that is, have left the house for a few minutes with my sister — but are not ' with me,' as you seem to understand it, — in the house to stay. They were kind to me in Rome, (husband and wife), and I am bound to be of what use I may during their short stay. Let me lose no time in begging and praying you to cry ' hands off ' to that dreadful Burgess ; have not I got a . . but I will tell you to-night — or on Friday which is my day, please — Friday. Till when, pray believe me, with respect and esteem, 170 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [August 20 Your most obliged and disobliged at these blank end- ings — what have I done? God bless you ever dearest friend. R. B. to E. B. B. Thursday, 7 o'clock. [Post-mark, August 21, 1845.] I feel at home, this blue early morning, now that I sit down to write (or, speak, as I try and fancy) to you, after a whole day with those ' other friends ' — dear good souls, whom I should be so glad to serve, and to whom service must go by way of last will and testament, if a few more hours of ' social joy,' ' kindly intercourse,' &c, fall to my portion. My friend the Countess began proceedings (when I first saw her, not yesterday) by asking ' if I had got as much money as I expected by any works published of late? ' — to which I answered, of course, ' exactly as much ' — 6 grazioso ! (All the same, if you were to ask her, or the like of her, ' how much the stone-work of the Coliseum would fetch, properly burned down to lime? ' — she would shudder from head to foot and call you ' barbaro ' with good Trojan heart.) Now you suppose — (watch my rhe- torical figure here) — you suppose I am going to congratu- late myself on being so much for the better, en pays de connaissance, with my ' other friend,' E. B. B., number 2 — or 200, why not? — whereas I mean to ' fulmine over Greece,' since thunder frightens you, for all the laurels, — and to have reason for your taking my own part and lot to yourself — I do, will, must, and will, again, wonder at you and admire you, and so on to the climax. It is a fixed, immovable thing : so fixed that I can well forego talking about it. But if to talk you once begin, ' the King shall enjoy (or receive quietly) his own again ' — I wear no bright weapon out of that Panoply . . or Panoplite, as I think you call Nonnus, nor ever, like Leigh Hunt's 'Johnny, ever blythe and bonny, went singing Nonny, nonny ' and see to-morrow, what a vengeance I will take for your ' mere 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARKETT 171 suspicion in that kind ' ! But to the serious matter . . nay, I said yesterday, I believe — keep off that Burgess — he is stark staring mad — mad, do you know? The last time I met him he told me he had recovered I forget how many of the lost books of Thucydides — found them im- bedded in Suidas (I think) , and had disengaged them from his Greek, without loss of a letter, ' by an instinct he, Bur- gess, had' — (I spell his name wrongly to help the proper hiss at the end) . Then, once on a time, he found in the ' Christus Patiens, ' an odd dozen of lines, clearly dropped out of the ' Prometheus, ' and proving that iEschylus was aware of the invention of gunpowder. He wanted to help Dr. Leonhard Schmitz in his ' Museum ' — and scared him, as Schmitz told me. What business has he, Burges, with English verse — and what on earth, or under it, has Miss Thomson to do with him. If she must displease one of two, why is Mr. B. not to be thanked and ' sent to feed,' as the French say prettily? At all events, do pray see what he has presumed to alter . . you can alter at sufficient warrant, profit by suggestion, I should think ! But it is all Miss Thomson's shame and fault : because she is quite in her propriety, saying to such intermeddlers, gently for the sake of their poor weak heads, ' very good, I dare say, very desirable emendations, only the work is not mine, you know, but my friend's, and you must no more alter it with- out her leave, than alter this sketch, this illustration, be- cause you think you could mend Ariadne's face or figure, — Fecit Tizianus, scripsit E. B. B.' Dear friend, you will tell Miss Thomson to stop further proceedings, will you not? There! only, do mind what I say? And now — till to-morrow ! It seems an age since I saw you. I want to catch our first post . . (this phrase I ought to get stereotyped — I need it so constantly). The day is fine . . you will profit by it, I trust. ' Flush, wag your tail and grow restless and scratch at the door ! ' God bless you, — my one friend, without an ' other ' — bless you ever— R. B, 172 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [August 25 K B. B. to R. B. Wednesday. [Post-mark, August 25, 1845.] But what have / done that you should ask what have you done? I have not brought any accusation, have I . . no, nor thought any, I am sure— and it was only the ' kind- ness and considerateness ' — argument that was irresistible as a thing to be retorted, when your thanks came so natu- rally and just at the corner of an application. And then, you know, it is gravely true, seriously true, sadly true, that I am always expecting to hear or to see how tired you are at last of me ! — sooner or later, you know ! — But I did not mean any seriousness in that letter. No, nor did I mean . . (to pass to another question . .) to provoke you to the Mister Hayley . . so are you . . reply complimentary. All I observed concerning yourself, was the combination — which not an idiom in chivalry could treat grammatically as a thing common to me and you, in- asmuch as everyone who has known me for half a day, may know that, if there is anything peculiar in me, it lies for the most part in an extraordinary deficiency in this and this and this, . . there is no need to describe what. Only nuns of the strictest sect of the nunneries are rather wiser in some points, and have led less restricted lives than I have in others. And if it had not been for my ' carpet- work ' Well — and do you know that I have, for the last few years, taken quite to despise book-knowledge and its effect on the mind — I mean when people live by it as most read- ers by profession do, . . cloistering their souls under these roofs made with heads, when they might be under the sky. Such people grow dark and narrow and low, with all their pains. Friday. — I was writing you see before you came — and 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 173 now I go on in haste to speak l off my mind ' some things which are on it. First . . of yourself ; how can it be that you are unwell again, . . and that you should talk (now did you not? — did I not hear you say so?) of being ' weary in your soul ' . . you ? What should make you, dearest friend, weary in your soul ; or out of spirits in any way ? ^Do . . tell me . . I was going to write without a pause — and almost I might, perhaps, . . even as one of the two hundred of your friends, . . almost I might say out that ' Do tell me.' Or is it (which I am inclined to think most probable) that you are tired of a same life and want change? It may happen to anyone sometimes, and is independent of your will and choice, you know — and I know, and the whole world knows : and would it not therefore be wise of you, in that case, to fold your life new again and go abroad at once? What can make you weary in your soul, is a problem to me. You are the last from whom I should have expected such a word. And you did say so, I think. I think that it was not a mistake of mine. And you, . . with a full liberty, and the world in your hand for every pur- pose and pleasure of it ! — Or is it that, being unwell, your spirits are affected by that? But then you might be more unwell than you like to admit — . And I am teasing you with talking of it . . am I not? — and being disagreeable is only one third of the way towards being useful, it is good to remember in time. And then the next thing to write off my mind is . . that you must not, you must not, make an unjust opinion out of what I said to-day. I have been uncomfortable since, lest you should — and perhaps it would have been better if I had not said it apart from all context in that way; only that you could not long be a friend of mine without knowing and seeing what so lies on the surface. But then, . . as far as I am concerned, . . no one cares less for a ' will ' than I do (and this though I never had one, . . in clear opposition to your theory which holds generally nevertheless) for a will in the common things of 174 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [August 25 life. Every now and then there must of course be a cross- ing and vexation — but in one's mere pleasures and fantasies, one would rather be crossed and vexed a little than vex a person one loves . . and it is possible to get used to the harness and run easily in it at last; and there is a side- world to hide one's thoughts in, and ' carpet-work ' to be immoral on in spite of Mrs. Jameson, . . and the word ' literature ' has, with me, covered a good deal of liberty as you must see . . real liberty which is never enquired into — and it has happened throughout my life by an acci- dent (as far as anything is accident) that my own sense of right and happiness on any important point of overt action, has never run contrariwise to the way of obedience required of me . . while in things not exactly overt, I and all of us are apt to act sometimes up to the limit of our means of acting, with shut doors and windows, and no waiting for cognisance or permission. Ah — and that last is the worst of it all perhaps ! to be forced into conceal- ments from the heart naturally nearest to us ; and forced away from the natural source of counsel and strength ! — and then, the disingenuousness — the cowardice — the ' vices of slaves ' ! — and everyone you see . . all my brothers, . . constrained bodily into submission . . apparent submis- sion at least . . by that worst and most dishonouring of necessities, the necessity of living, everyone of them all, except myself, being dependent in money-matters on the inflexible will . . do you see? But what you do not see, what you cannot see, is the deep tender affection behind and below all those patriarchal ideas of governing grown up children ' in the way they must go ! ' and there never was (under the strata) a truer affection in a father's heart . . no, nor a worthier heart in itself . . a heart loyaller and purer, and more compelling to gratitude and reverence, than his, as I see it ! The evil is in the system — and he simply takes it to be his duty to rule, and to make happy according to his own views of the propriety of happiness — he takes it to be his duty to rule like the Kings of Chris- 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 175 tendom, by divine right. But he loves us through and through it — and I, for one, love Mm I and when, five years ago, I lost what I loved best in the world beyond compari- son and rivalship . . far better than himself as he knew 7 . . for everyone who knew me could not choose but know what was my first and chiefest affection . . when I lost that, . . I felt that he stood the nearest to me on the closed grave . . or by the unclosing sea . . I do not know which nor could ask. And I will tell you that not only he has been kind and patient and forbearing to me through the tedious trial of this illness (far more trying to standers by than you have an idea of perhaps) but that he was generous and for- bearing in that hour of bitter trial, and never reproached me as he might have done and as my own soul has not spared — never once said to me then or since, that if it had not been for me, the crown of his house would not have fallen. He never did . . and he might have said it, and more — and I could have answered nothing. Nothing, except that I had paid my own price — and that the price I paid was greater than his loss . . his ! ! For see how it was ; and how, ' not with my hand but heart, ' I was the cause or oc- casion of that misery — and though not with the intention of my heart but with its weakness, yet the occasion, any way ! They sent me down you know to Torquay — Dr. Cham- bers saying that I could not live a winter in London. The worst — what people call the worst — was apprehended for me at that time. So I was sent down with my sister to my aunt there — and he, my brother whom I loved so, was sent too, to take us there and return. And when the time came for him to leave me, /, to whom he was the dearest of friends and brothers in one . . the only one of my family who . . well, but I cannot write of these things; and it is enough to tell you that he was above us all, better than us all, and kindest and noblest and dearest to me, beyond comparison, any comparison, as I said — and when the time came for him to leave me J, weakened by illness, could not master my spirits or drive back my tears — and my aunt kissed them 176 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [August 25 away instead of reproving me as she should have done ; and said that she would take care that I should not be grieved . . she ! . . and so she sate down and wrote a let- ter to Papa to tell him that he would ' break my heart ' if he persisted in calling away my brother — As if hearts were broken so! I have thought bitterly since that my heart did not break for a good deal more than that ! And Papa's answer was — burnt into me, as with fire, it is — that ' under such circumstances he did not refuse to suspend his pur- pose, but that he considered it to be very wrong in me to exact such a thing. ' So there was no separation then : and month after month passed — and sometimes I was better and sometimes worse — and the medical men continued to say that they would not answer for my life . . they ! if I were agitated — and so there was no more talk of a separa- tion. And once he held my hand, . . how I remember ! and said that he ' loved me better than them all and that he would not leave me . . till I was well, ' he said ! how I remember that! And ten days from that day the boat had left the shore which never returned ; never — and he had left me ! gone ! For three days we waited — and I hoped while I could — oh — that awful agony of three days ! And the sun shone as it shines to-day, and there was no more wind than now; and the sea under the windows was like this paper for smoothness — and my sisters drew the cur- tains back that I might see for myself how smooth the sea was, and how it could hurt nobody — and other boats came back one by one. .Remember how you wrote in your ' Gismond ' What says the body when they spring Some monstrous torture-engine's whole Strength on it? No more says the soul. and you never wrote anything which lived with me more than that. It is such a dreadful truth. But you knew it for truth, I hope, by your genius, and not by such proof as mine — I, who could not speak or shed a tear, but lay for weeks and months half conscious, half unconscious, 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 177 with a wandering mind, and too near to God under the crushing of His hand, to pray at all. I expiated all my weak tears before, by not being able to shed then one tear — and yet they were forbearing — and no voice said ' You have done this. ' Do not notice what I have written to you, my dearest friend. I have never said so much to a living being — I never could speak or write of it. I asked no question from the moment when my last hope went : and since then, it has been impossible for me to speak what was in me. I have borne to do it to-day and to you, but perhaps if you were to write — so do not let this be noticed between us again — do not ! And besides there is no need ! I do not reproach myself with such acrid thoughts as I had once — I know that I would have died ten times over for him, and that therefore though it was wrong of me to be weak, and I have suffered for it and shall learn by it I hope ; remorse is not precisely the word for me — not at least in its full sense. Still you will comprehend from what I have told you how the spring of life must have seemed to break within me then; and how natural it has been for me to loathe the living on — and to lose faith (even without the loathing), to lose faith in myself . . which I have done on some points utterly. It is not from the cause of illness — no. And you will comprehend too that I have strong rea- sons for being grateful to the forbearance. . . It would have been cruel, you think, to reproach me. Perhaps so! yet the kindness and patience of the desisting from reproach, are positive things all the same. Shall I be too late for the post, I wonder? Wilson tells me that you were followed upstairs yesterday (I write on Saturday this latter part) by somebody whom you prob- ably took for my father. Which is Wilson's idea — and I hope not yours. No — it was neither father nor other rela- tive of mine, but an old friend in rather an ill temper. And so goodbye until Tuesday. Perhaps I shall . . Vol. I.— 12 178 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNlKG L August 25 not . . hear from you to-night. Don't let the tragedy or aught else do you harm — will you? and try not to be ' weary in your soul ' any more — and forgive me this gloomy letter I half shrink from sending you, yet will send. May God bless you. 1j. L>. B. B. B. to E. B. B. Wednesday Morning. [Post-mark, August 27, 1845.] On the subject of your letter — quite irrespective of the injunction in it — I would not have dared speak ; now, at least. But I may permit myself, perhaps, to say I am most grateful, most grateful, dearest friend, for this admis- sion to participate, in my degree, in these feelings. There is a better thing than being happy in your happiness ; I feel, now that you teach me, it is so. I will write no more now; though that sentence of 'what you are expecting, — that I shall be tired of you &c.,' — though I could blot that out of your mind for ever by a very few words now, — for you would believe me at this moment, close on the other subject :— but I will take no such advantage — I will wait. I have many things (indifferent things, after those) to say ; will you write, if but a few lines, to change the asso- ciations for that purpose? Then I will write too. — May God bless you, — in what is past and to come! I pray that from my heart, being yours It. B. E. B. B. to R. B. Wednesday Morning. [Post-mark, August 27, 1845.] But your ' Saul ' is unobjectionable as far as I can see, my dear friend. He was tormented by an evil spirit — but how, we are not told . . and the consolation is not obliged 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 179 to be definite, . . is it? A singer was sent for as a singer — and all that you are called upon to be true to, are the general characteristics of David the chosen, standing be- tween his sheep and his dawning hereafter, between inno- cence and holiness, and with what you speak of as the f gracious gold locks ' besides the chrism of the prophet, on his own head — and surely you have been happy in the tone and spirit of these lyrics . . broken as you have left them. Where is the wrong in all this? For the right and beauty, they are more obvious — and I cannot tell you how the poem holds me and will not let me go until it blesses me . . and so, where are the ' sixty lines ' thrown away? I do beseech you . . you who forget nothing, . . to re- member them directly, and to go on with the rest . . as directly (be it understood) as is not injurious to your health. The whole conception of the poem, I like . . and the execution is exquisite up to this point — and the sight of Saul in the tent, just struck out of the dark by that sun- beam, ' a thing to see,' . . not to say that afterwards when he is visibly ' caught in his fangs ' like the king serpent, . . the sight is grander still. How could you doubt about this poem. . . At the moment of writing which, I receive your note. Do you receive my assurances from the deepest of my heart that I never did otherwise than ' believe ' you . . never did nor shall do . . and that you completely misinterpreted my words if you drew another meaning from them. Be- lieve me in this — will you? I could not believe you any more for anything you could say, now or hereafter — and so do not avenge yourself on my unwary sentences by re- membering them against me for evil. I did not mean to vex you . . still less to suspect you — indeed I did not ! and moreover it was quite your fault that I did not blot it out after it was written, whatever the meaning was. So you forgive me (altogether) for your own sins : you must: — For my part, though I have been sorry since to have written you such a gloomy letter, the sorrow unmakes 180 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [August 27 itself in hearing you speak so kindly. Your sympathy is precious to me, I may say. May God bless you. Write and tell me among the ' indifferent things ' something not indifferent, how you are yourself, I mean . . for I fear you are not well and thought you were not looking so yesterday. Dearest friend, I remain yours, E. B. B K B. B. to R. B. Friday Evening. [Post-mark, August 30, 1845. ] I do not hear; and come to you to ask the alms of just one line, having taken it into my head that something is the matter. It is not so much exactingness on my part, as that you spoke of meaning to write as soon as you received a note of mine . . which went to you five minutes after- wards . . which is three days ago, or will be when you read this. Are you not well — or what? Though I have tried and wished to remember having written in the last note something very or even a little offensive to you, I failed in it and go back to the worse fear. For you could not be vexed with me for talking of what was ' your fault ' . . ' your own fault, ' viz. in having to read sentences which, but for your commands, would have been blotted out. You could not very well take that for serious blame ! from me too, who have so much reason and provocation for blaming the archangel Gabriel. — No — you could not misinterpret so, — and if you could not, and if you are not displeased with me, you must be unwell, I think. I took for granted yesterday that you had gone out as before — but to-night it is different — and so I come to ask you to be kind enough to write one word for me by some post to-morrow. Now remember . . I am not asking for a letter — but for a word . . or line strictly speaking. Ever yours, dear friend, E. B. B. 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 181 R. B. to E. B. B. [Post-mark, August 30, 1845.] This sweet Autumn Evening, Friday, comes all golden into the room and makes me write to you — not think of you — yet what shall I write? It must be for another time . . after Monday, when I am to see you, you know, and hear if the headache be gone, since your note would not round to the perfection of kind- ness and comfort, and tell me so. God bless my dearest friend. KB. I am much better — well, indeed — thank you. R. B. to E. B. B. [Post-mark, August 30, 1845.] Can you understand me so, dearest friend, after all? Do you see me — when I am away, or with you — ' taking offence ' at words, ' being vexed ' at words, or deeds of yours, even if I could not immediately trace them to their source of entire, pure kindness ; as I have hitherto done in every smallest instance? I believe in you absolutely, utterly — I believe that when you bade me, that time, be silent — that such was your bid- ding, and I was silent — dare I say I think you did not know at that time the power I have over myself, that I could sit and speak and listen as I have done since? Let me say now — this only once — that I loved you from my soul, and gave you my life, so much of it as you would take, — and all that is done, not to be altered now: it was, in the nature of the proceeding, wholly independent of any return on your part. I will not think on extremes you might have resorted to; as it is, the assurance of your friendship, the intimacy to which you admit me, now, make the truest, deepest joy of my life — a joy I can never thinly 182 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [August 30 fugitive while we are in life, because I know, as to me, I could not willingly displease you, — while, as to you, your goodness and understanding will always see to the bottom of involuntary or ignorant faults — always help me to cor- rect them. I have done now. If I thought you were like other women I have known, I should say so much ! — but — (my first and last word — I believe in you !) — what you could and would give me, of your affection, you would give nobly and simply and as a giver — you would not need that I tell you — (tell you!) — what would be supreme happiness to me in the event — however distant — I repeat . . I call on your justice to remember, on your intelligence to believe . . that this is merely a more pre- cise stating the first subject; to put an end to any possible misunderstanding — to prevent your henceforth believing that because I do not write, from thinking too deeply of you, I am offended, vexed &c. &c. I will never recur to this, nor shall you see the least difference in my manner next Monday : it is indeed, always before me . . how I know nothing of you and yours. But I think I ought to have spoken when I did — and to speak clearly . . or more clearly what I do, as it is my pride and duty to fall back, now, on the feeling with which I have been in the mean- time — Yours — God bless you — II. J3. Let me write a few words to lead into Monday — and say, you have probably received my note. I am much better — with a little headache, which is all, and fast going this morning. Of yours you say nothing — I trust you see your . . dare I say your duty in the Pisa affair, as all else must see it — shall I hear on Monday? And my 'Saul' that you are so lenient to. Bless you ever — 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 183 K B. B. to B. B. Sunday. [August 31, 1845.] I did not think you were angry — I never said so. But you might reasonably have been wounded a little, if you had suspected rue of blaming you for any bearing of yours towards myself; and this was the amount of my fear— or rather hope . . since I conjectured most that you were not well. And after all you did think . . do think . . that in some way or for some moment I blamed you, disbelieved you, distrusted you — or why this letter? How have I pro- voked this letter? Can I forgive m3 r self for having even seemed to have provoked it? and will you believe me that if for the past's sake you sent it, it was unnecessary, and if for the future's, irrelevant? Which I say from no want of sensibility to the words of it — your words always make themselves felt — but in fulness of purpose not to suffer you to hold to words because they have been said, nor to say them as if to be holden by them. Why, if a thousand more such words were said by you to me, how could they operate upon the future or present, supposing me to choose to keep the possible modification of your feelings, as a probability, in my sight and yours? Can you help my sitting with the doors all open if I think it right? I do attest to you — while I trust you, as you must see, in word and act, and while I am confident that no human being ever stood higher or purer in the eyes of another, than you do in mine, — that you would still stand high and remain unalterably my friend, if the probability in question became a fact, as now at this moment. And this I must say, since you have said other things : and this alone, which 1 have said, concerns the future, I remind you earnestly. My dearest friend — you have followed the most gener- ous of impulses in your whole bearing to me — and I have recognised and called by its name, in my heart, each one 184 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [August 31 of them. Yet I cannot help adding that, of us two, yours has not been quite the hardest part . . I mean, to a gener- ous nature like your own, to which every sort of noble- ness comes easily. Mine has been more difficult — and I have sunk under it again and again : and the sinking and the effort to recover the duty of a lost position, may have given me an appearance of vacillation and lightness, un- worthy at least of you, and perhaps of both of us. Not- withstanding which appearance, it was right and just (only just) of you, to believe in me — in my truth — because I have never failed to you in it, nor been capable of such failure : the thing I have said, I have meant . . always : and in things I have not said, the silence has had a reason some- where different perhaps from where you looked for it. And this brings me to complaining that you, who profess to believe in me, do yet obviously believe that it was only merely silence, which I required of you on one occasion — ■ and that if I had 'known your power over yourself,' I should not have minded . . no ! In other words you be- lieve of me that I was thinkiug just of my own (what shall I call it for a motive base and small enough?) my own scrupulousness . . freedom from embarrassment! of my- self in the least of me; in the tying of my shoestrings, say!— so much and no more! Now this is so wrong, as to make me impatient sometimes in feeling it to be your impression : I asked for silence — but also and chiefly for the putting away of . . you know very well what I asked for. And this was sincerely done, I attest to you. You wrote once to me . . oh, long before May and the day we met: that you 'had been so happy, you should be now justified to yourself in taking any step most hazardous to the happiness of your life ' — but if you were justified, could 1 be therefore justified in abetting such a step, — the step of wasting, in a sense, your best feelings . . of emptying your water gourds into the sand? What I thought then I think now — just what any third person, knowing you, would think, I think and feel. I thought too, at first, that 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 185 the feeling on your part was a mere generous impulse, likely to expend itself in a week perhaps. It affects me and has affected me, very deeply, more than I dare attempt to say, that you should persist so — and if sometimes I have felt, by a sort of instinct, that after all you would not go on to persist, and that (being a man, you know) you might mistake, a little unconsciously, the strength of your own feeling ; you ought not to be surprised ; when I felt it was more advantageous and happier for you that it should be so. In any case, I shall never regret my own share in the events of this summer, and your friendship will be dear to me to the last. You know I told you so — not long since. And as to what you say otherwise, you are right in think- ing that I would not hold by unworthy motives in avoiding to speak what you had any claim to hear. But what could I speak that would not be unjust to you? Your life ! if you gave it to me and I put my whole heart into it ; what should I put but anxiety, and more sadness than you were born to? What could I give you, which it would not be ungenerous to give? Therefore we must leave this sub- ject — and I must trust you to leave it without one word more ; (too many have been said already — but I could not let your letter pass quite silently . . as if I had nothing to do but to receive all as matter of course so ! ) while you may well trust me to remember to my life's end, as the grateful remember ; and to feel, as those do who have felt sorrow (for where these pits are dug, the water will stand), the full price of your regard. May God bless you, my dearest friend. I shall send this letter after I have seen you, and hope you may not have expected to hear sooner. Ever yours, E. B. B. Monday. 6. p.m. I send in disobedience to your com- mands, Mrs. Shelley's book — but when books accumulate and when besides, I want to let you have the American edition of my poems . , famous for all manner of blun- 186 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [August 31 ders, you know ; what is to be done but have recourse to the parcel-medium ? You were in jest about being at Pisa before or as soon as we were ? — oh no — that must not be in- deed — we must wait a little ! — even if you determine to go at all, which is a question of doubtful expediency. Do take more exercise, this week, and make war against those dreadful sensations in the head — now, will you? B. B. to E. B. B. Tuesday Evening. [Post-mark, September 3, 1845.] I rather hoped . . with no right at all . . to hear from you this morning or afternoon — to know how you are — that, ' how are you,' there is no use disguising, is, — vary it how one may — my own life's question. — I had better write no more, now. Will you not tell me something about you — the head; and that too, too warm hand . . or was it my fancy? Surely the report of Dr. Chambers is most satisfactory, — all seems to rest with yourself : you know, in justice to me, you do know that 1 know the all but mockery, the absurdity of anyone's coun- sel ' to be composed,' &c. &c. But try, dearest friend! God bless you — I am yours It. B. M. B. to E. B. B. Tuesday Night. [Post-mark, September 3, 1845.] Before you leave London, I will answer your letter — all my attempts end in nothing now — Dearest friend — I am yours ever E. B. But meantime, you will tell me about yourself, will yon not? The parcel came a few minutes after my note left — 1845] AND ELIZABETH BARRETT 187 Well, I can thank you for that; for the Poems, — though I cannot wear them round my neck — and for the too great trouble. My heart's friend ! Bless you — E. x>. .D. to R. JB. [Post-mark, September 4, 1845.] Indeed my headaches are not worth enquiring about — I mean, they are not of the slightest consequence, and sel- dom survive the remedy of a cup of coffee. I only wish it were the same with everybody — I mean, with every head! Also there is nothing the matter otherwise — and I am going to prove my right to a ' clean bill of health ' by going into the park in ten minutes. Twice round the inner enclosure is what I can compass now — which is equal to once round the world — is it not? I had just time to be afraid that the parcel had not reached you. The reason wh\ r I sent you the poems was that I had a few copies to give to my personal friends, and so, wished you to have one ; and it was quite to please my- self and not to please you that I made you have it; and if you put it into the ' x^lum-tree ' to hide the errata, I shall be pleased still, if not rather more. Only let me remem- ber to tell you this time in relation to those books and the question asked of yourself by your noble Romans, that just as I was enclosing my sixty-pounds debt to Mr. Mox- on, I did actually and miraculously receive a remittance of fourteen pounds from the selfsame bookseller of New York who agreed last year to print my poems at his own risk and give me ' ten per cent on the profit. ' Not that I ever asked for such a thing! They were the terms offered. And I always considered the * per centage ' as quite vision- ary . . put in for the sake of effect, to make the agree- ment look better! But no— you see! One's poetry has a real 'commercial value,' if you do but take it far away enough from the ' civilization of Europe.' When you get near the backwoods and the red Indians, it turns out to be 188 THE LETTERS OF ROBERT BROWNING [Sept. 4 nearly as good for something as ' cabbages, ' after all ! Do you remember what you said to me of cabbages versus poems, in one of the first letters you ever wrote to me? — of selling cabbages and buying Punches ? People complain of Dr. Chambers and call him rough and unfeeling — neither of which I ever found him for a moment — and I like him for his truthfulness, which is the nature of the man, though it is essential to medical moral- ity never to let a patient think himself mortal while it is possible to prevent it, and even Dr. Chambers may incline to this on occasion. Still he need not have said all the good he said to me on Saturday — he used not to say any of it ; and he must have thought some of it : and, any way, the Pisa-case is strengthened all round by his opinion and injunction, so that all my horror and terror at the thoughts of his visit, (and it's really true that I would rather suffer to a certain extent than be cured by means of those doc- tors !) had some compensation. How are you? do not for- get to say ! I found among some papers to-day, a note of yours which I asked Mr. Kenyon to give me for an auto- graph, two years ago. May God bless you, dearest friend. And I have a dis- pensation from ' beef and porter ' &k robs alcbvas. ' On no account ' was the answer ! H. B. to E. B. B. Friday Afternoon. [Post-mark, September 5, 1845.] What you tell me of Dr. Chambers', ' all the good of you ' he said, and all I venture to infer ; this makes me most happy and thankful. Do you use to attach our old ru