UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA 
 AT LOS ANGELES 
 
 Gift of 
 Walter Rubs amen
 
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 C. CHURCHILL. 
 
 
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 WORK 
 
 O F 
 
 C. CHURCHILL. 
 
 IN FOUR. VOLUMES. 
 
 V O L. II. 
 
 THE FIFTH EDITION. 
 
 LONDON: 
 
 Printed for JOHN CHURCHILL (Executor to the late 
 C.CHURCHILL); and W.FLEXNEV, HOLBORN. 
 
 MDCC 
 
 /e,
 
 
 -PR 
 334* 
 
 THE 
 
 BOOK III. 
 
 G H O S T/ 
 
 TT WAS THE HOUR, when Hufiuifi 
 
 -*- With P^r/ and Linen hangs each thorn ; 
 
 When happy Bards, who can regale 
 Their Mufe with country air and a!e, 
 Ramble afield, to Brooks and Bow'rs, 
 To pick up Sentiments and Flowers ; 
 When Dogs and Squires from ker.nel fly, 
 And Hogs and Farmers quit their fry ; 
 
 VOL, II. B When 
 
 40
 
 THE GHOST. 
 
 When my Lord rifes to the Chace, 
 And brawney Chaplain takes his place. 
 
 Thefe Images, or bad or good, 
 If they are rightly underflood, 
 Sagacious Readers muft allow, 
 Proclaim us in the -Country now. 
 For Obfervations moftly rife 
 From Obje&s juft before our eyes, 
 And ev'ry Lord in Critic Wit, 
 Can tell you where the piece was writ, ' 
 Can point out, as he goes along, 
 (And who (hall dare to fay he's wrong ?) 
 Whether the Warmth (for Bards we know 
 At prefent, never more than glow) 
 Was in the Town or Country caught, 
 By the peculiar turn of thought. 
 
 IT WAS THE HOUR tho' Critics frown, 
 We now declare ourfelves in Town, 
 Nor' will a moment's paufe allow 
 For rinding when we came, or how. 
 The Man, who deals in humble Profe, 
 Tied down by rule and method, goes j
 
 T H E G H O S T, 2 
 
 But they who court the vig'rous Mufe, 
 Their carriage have a right to chufe. 
 Free as the Air, and unconfm'd, 
 Swift as the motions of the Mind, 
 The POET darts from place to place, 
 And inftant bounds o'er Time and Space, 
 Nature (whilft blended fire and (kill 
 Inflame our paflions to his will) 
 Smiles at her viohted Laws, 
 And crowns his daring with applaufe. 
 
 Should there be fti!! fome rigid few, 
 Who keep propriety in view, 
 Whofe heads turn round, and cannot bear 
 This whirling pafiage thro' the Air, 
 Free leave have fuch at home to fit, 
 And write a Regimen for Wit ; 
 To clip our pinions let them try, 
 Not having heart themfelves to fly. 
 
 IT WAS THE HOUR, when Devotees 
 Breathe pious curfes on their knees, 
 When they with pray'rs the d'y begin 
 To funftify a Night of Sin j 
 
 B 2 When
 
 THE GHOST. 
 
 When Rogues of Modefty, who roam 
 Under the veil of Night, fneak home, 
 That free from all reftraint and awe, 
 Juft to the windward of the Law, 
 Lefs mode.l Rogues their tricks may play, 
 And plunder in, the face of day. 
 
 But hold whilft thus we play the fool, 
 In bold contempt of ev'ry rule, 
 Things of no confequence exprefling, 
 Defcribing now, and now dlgreffmg^ 
 To the difcredit of our (kill, 
 The main concern is (landing ftill, 
 
 In Plays indeed, when ftorms of rags 
 Tempeftuous in the Soul engage, 
 Or when the Spirits weak and low, 
 Are funk in deep diftrefs and woe, 
 With ftricl Propriety we hear 
 DESCRIPTION flealing on the ear, 
 And put off feeling half an hour 
 To thatch a cot, or paint a fioiu'r ; 
 But in thefeferious works, defign'd 
 To mend the morals of Mankind,
 
 THEGHOST. 5 
 
 We rnuft for ever be difgrac'd 
 With all the nicer fons of Tafte, 
 If once, the Shadow to purfue, 
 We let the Subftance out of view. 
 Our me:ns muft uniformly tend 
 In due proportion to their end, 
 And ev'iy paflage aptly join 
 To bring about the one defign. 
 Our Friends themfelves cannot admit 
 This rambling, wild digrefiive Wit, 
 No not thofe very Friends, who found 
 Their Credit on the felf-fame ground. 
 
 Peace, my good grumbling Sir for once, 
 Sunk in the folemn, formal Dunce, 
 This Coxcomb mall your fears beguile- 
 We will be dull that you may fmile. 
 
 Come METHOD, come in all thy pride, 
 DULLNESS and WHITEHEAD by thy fide, 
 DULLNESS and METHOD ftill are one, 
 And WHITEHEAD is their darling Son. 
 Not He whofe pen, above controul, 
 Struck terror to the guilty Soul, 
 
 B 3 Made
 
 ',6 THE GHOST. 
 
 Made Folly tremble thro' her ftate, 
 And Villains blufti at being Great, 
 Whilft he himfelf, with fteady face, 
 Difdaining Modefty and Grace, 
 Could blunder on thro' thick and thin, 
 Thro' ev'ry mean and fervile fin, 
 , Yet fwear by PHILIP and by PAUL, 
 He nobly fcorn'd to blufh at all ; 
 But HE, who in the Laureat Chair, 
 By Grace, not Merit planted there, 
 In aukward pomp is feen to fit, 
 And by his Patent proves his Wit ; 
 For favours of the Great, we know, 
 Can Wit as well as rank beftow, 
 And they who, without one pretenfion, 
 Can get for Fools a place or penfion, 
 Muft able be fuppos'd of courfe 
 (If reafon is allow'd due force) 
 To give fuch qualities and grace, 
 As may equip them for the place. 
 
 But HE who meafures as he goes, 
 A mongrel kind of tinkling profe, 
 
 And
 
 THE GHOST. 
 
 And is too frugal to difpenfe, 
 At once both Poetry and Senfe, 
 Who, from amidil: \\\s JlumV ring guards, 
 Deals out a Charge to Suhjeft Ba d>, 
 Where Couplets after Couplets creep 
 Propitious to the reign of deep, 
 Yet ev'ry word imprints an awe, 
 And all his dictates pafs for law 
 With BEAUX, who fimper all around, 
 And BELLES, who die in ev'ry found. 
 For in all things of this relation, 
 Men moftly judge from Jit uat ion y 
 Nor in a thoufand find we cne, 
 Who really weighs what's faid or done. 
 They deal out Cenfure, or give C-edit, 
 Merely from, him who did or faid it. 
 
 But HE who, happily ferene, 
 Means nothing, yet would feem to mean j 
 Who rules and cautions can difpenfe 
 With all that humble infolence, 
 Which Impudence in vain would teach, 
 And none but modefl men can reach j 
 
 B 4 Who
 
 THE GHQST, 
 
 Who adds to SENTIMENTS the grace 
 Of always being put of place, 
 And drawls out MORAL? with an air 
 A Gentleman would blufh to wear ; 
 Who, on the chaflfj}^ fimpleft plan, 
 As Chafle t zsfimple as the Man, 
 Without or Character^ or Plot, 
 NATURE unknown, and ART forgot, 
 Can, with much racking of the brains, 
 And ye >rs confum'd in letter'd pains, 
 A heap of words together lay, 
 And, fmirking, call the thing a Play ; 
 W^ho Champion fworn in Virtue's caufe, 
 'Gainft Vice his tiny bodkin draws, 
 But to no part of Prudence ftranger, 
 Firft blunts the point for fear of danger. 
 So Nurfes fage, as Caution works, 
 When Children firft ufe knives and forks, 
 For fear of mifcjiief, it is known, 
 To others fingers, or their own, 
 To take the edge off wifely chufe, 
 Tho' the fame ftroke takes off the ufe.
 
 THE GHOST. 
 
 Thee, WHITEHEAD, Thee I now invoke, 
 Sworn foe to Satyr's gen'rous ftroke, 
 Which makes unwilling Conference feel, 
 And wounds, but only wounds to heal. 
 Good-natur'd, eafy Creature, mild, 
 And gentle as a new-born Child, 
 Thy heart would never once admit 
 E'en wholefome rigour to thy Wit ; 
 Thy htad, if Confcience mould comply, 
 Its kind afiiftance would deny, 
 And lend thee neither force, nor art, 
 To drive it onward to the heart. 
 O may thy facred pow'r controul 
 Each fiercer working of my foul, 
 Damp every fpark of genuine fire, 
 And languors, like thine own, infpire ; 
 Trite be each Thought, and ev'ry Line 
 AS Moral) and as Duh as THINE, 
 
 Pois'd in mid-air (it matters not 
 
 To afcertain the very fpot, 
 Nor yet to give you a relation, 
 flow it eluded Gravitation ) 
 
 Hum
 
 10 THEGHQST. 
 
 Hung a Watch-Tow" r -by VULCAN plann'd 
 With fuch rare ikill, by JOVE'S Command, 
 That ev'r.y word, which whifper'd here 
 Scarce vibrates to the neighbour ear, 
 On the ftill bofom of the Air 
 Is borne, and heard diftindly there, 
 The Palace of an ancient Dame, 
 Whom Men a$ well as Gods call FAME. 
 
 A prattling G^JJlp, on whofe tongue 
 Proof of perpetual motion hung, 
 Whofe lungs in ftrength all lungs furpafs, 
 Like her own Trumpet made of brafs, 
 Who with an hundred pair of eyes 
 The vain attacks of fleep defies ; 
 Who with an hundred pair of wings 
 News from the fartheft quarters brings, 
 Sees, hears, and tells, untold before, 
 All that me knows, and ten times more. 
 
 Not all the Virtues which we find 
 Concenter'd in a HUNTER'S mind, 
 Can make her fpare the ranc'rous tale, 
 If in one point (he chance to fail ; 
 
 Or
 
 T H E G H O S T. 11 
 
 Or if, once in a thoufand years, 
 A perfect Character appears, 
 Such as of late with joy and pride 
 My Soul pofle.Vd, ere ARROW died ; 
 Or fuch as, Envy muft allow, 
 
 The World enjoys in H now ; 
 
 This Hag, who aims at all alike, 
 At Virtues e'en like theirs will ftrike, 
 And make faults, in the way of trade, 
 When (he can't "find them ready made. 
 
 All things (he takes in, fmall end great, 
 Talks of a Tcy-Jhop and a State, 
 Of IVits and Fools, of Saints and Kings, 
 Of Garters, Stars, and Leading-Strings, 
 Of Old Lords fumbling for a Clap, 
 And young 'Ones full of Pray'r and Pap, 
 Of Courts, of Morals, and Tye-Wigs, 
 Of Bears, and Serjeants dancing jigs, 
 Of Grave Profe/ors at the Bar 
 Learning to thrum on the Guittar, 
 Whilft Laws are Jlubberd o'er in hafte, 
 And Judgment facrific'd to TASTE ; 
 
 Cf
 
 TH GHOST. 
 
 Of Wkited Sepulchres, Lavjn Sleeves, 
 And GOD'S boufe made a den of thieves ; 
 Of Fun' ral pomps, where Clamours hung, 
 And fix'd difgrace on ev'ry tongue, 
 Whilft SENSE and ORDER bJufh'd to fee 
 Nobles without HUMANITY ; 
 Of Coronations, where each heart, 
 With honeft raptures, bore a part ; 
 Of City Feajls, where ELEGANCE 
 Was proud her Colours to advance, 
 And GLUTTONY, uncommon cafe, 
 Could only get the feccnd place ; 
 Of New rais'd Pillars in the State, 
 Who muft be good as being great ; 
 Of Shoulders, on which HONOURS fit 
 Almoft as clumfily as IVit \ 
 Of doughty Knights, whom titles pleafe, 
 But not the payment of the Fees j 
 Of Leflures, whither ev'ry Fool 
 In fecond childhood ^goes to fchool ; 
 Of Grey Beards deaf to Reafon's call, 
 From Inn of Court, or City Hall, 
 Whom youthful Appetites enflave, 
 With one Foot fairly in the grave. 
 
 By
 
 T H E G H O S T. 13 
 
 By help of Crutch, a needful Brother, 
 
 Learning of HART to dance with t'other ; 
 
 Of Doff or s regularly bred 
 
 To fill the manfions of the dead ; 
 
 Of Quacks (for Quacks they muft be ftill 
 
 Who fave when FORMS require to kill) 
 
 Who life, and health, and vigour give 
 
 To HIM, not one would wifh to live j 
 
 Of Artijls who, with nobleft view, 
 
 Difinterefted plans purfue, 
 
 For trembling worth the ladder raife, 
 
 And mark out the afccnt to praife ; 
 
 Of Arts and Sciences, where meet 
 
 Sublime, Profound^ and all compleaf^ 
 
 A SET (whom at forne fitter time 
 
 The MUSE fhall confecrate in Rime) 
 
 Who humble ARTISTS to out-do 
 
 A far more lib'rvl plan purfue, 
 
 And let fheir well-judgd PREMIUMS fall 
 
 On thofe who have no worth at all ; 
 
 Of Sign Poft Exhibitions, rais'd 
 
 For laughter more than to be prais'd 
 
 (Tho' by the way we cannot fee 
 
 Why Praife and Laugher mayn't agree) 
 
 Who*
 
 T H 5 G H O S T. 
 
 Where genuine HUMOUR runs to wafte, 
 And juftly chides our want of Tafte, 
 Cenfur'd, like other things, tho' good, 
 Becaufe they are not underftood. 
 
 To higher fubjects now SHE foars, 
 And talks of Politic and Whores 
 (If to your nice and chafter ears 
 That Term indelicate appears, 
 SCRIPTURE politely mall refine, 
 And melt It into Concubine) 
 In the fame breath fpread BOURBON'S league 
 And pub'li(hes the Grand Intrigue^ 
 In BRUSSELS or our own GAZETTE, 
 Makes armies fight which never met, 
 And circulates the Pox or Plague 
 To LONDON, by the way of HAGUE, 
 For all the lies which there appear, 
 Stamp'd with Authority come here ; 
 Borrows as freely from the gabble 
 Of fome rude leader of a rabble, 
 Or from the quaint harangues of thofe 
 Who lead a Nation by the Nofe, 
 
 As
 
 T H E G H S T. 
 
 As from thofe Jtorms , which, void of Art, 
 Burft from our boneft PATRIOT'S heart, 
 When ELOQUENCE and VIRTUE (late 
 Remark'd to live in mutual liate) 
 Fond of each other's Friendship grown, 
 Claim ev'ry fentence for their own, 
 And with an equal joy recites 
 Parade Amours^ and half-pay -Fl^bts^ 
 Perform'd by Heroes of fair Weather , 
 Merely by dint of Lace and Feather , 
 As thofe rare a&s which HONOUR taught 
 Our daring Sons where GRANBY fought, 
 Or thofe which, with fuperior Hull, 
 - atchiev'd \syfomdingjlill. 
 
 This HAG (the curious if they pleafe 
 May fearch from earlieft Times to thefe, 
 And POETS they'will always fee, 
 With Gods and Goddejfis make free, 
 Treating them all, except the MUSE, 
 As fcarcely fit to wipe their fhoes) 
 Who had beheld, from firft to laft 
 How our TRIUMVIRATE had pafc'd 
 
 Night's
 
 j6 THEGHOST. 
 
 Night's dreadful interval, and heard. 
 With ftrict attention, ev'ry word, 
 Soon as file faw return of light, 
 On founding pinions took her flight. 
 
 Swift thro' the regions of the fky, 
 Above the reach of human eye, 
 Onward (he drove the furious blaft, 
 And rapid as a whirlwind paft 
 O'er Countries , once the feats of Tajle^ 
 By Time and Ignorance laid wafte ; 
 O'er lands, where former ages faw 
 Reafon and Truth the only Law, 
 Where Arts and Arms> and Public Love 
 In gen'rous emulation ftrove, 
 Where Kings were proud of legal fway, 
 And Subjects happy to obey, 
 Tho' now in flav'ry funk, and broke 
 To SuperJIitions galling yoke, 
 Of Art!) of jfrmr, no more they tell, 
 Or Freedom, which with Science fell. 
 By Tyrants aw'd, who never find 
 The paflage to their people's mind,
 
 THE GHOST. 17 
 
 To whom the joy was never known 
 Of planting in the heart their throne, 
 Far from all profpecl of relief, 
 Their hours in fruitlefs pray'rs and grief, 
 For lofs of bleffings they employ, 
 Which WE ttntbankfeUy enjoy. 
 
 Now is the time (had we the will) 
 T' amaze the Reader with our fkill, 
 To pour out fuch a flood of knowledge 
 As might fuffice for a whole College, 
 Whilft with a true Poetic force 
 We trac'd the Goddefs in her courfe, 
 Sweetly defcribing, in our flight, 
 Each Common and Uncommon Sight, 
 Making our journal gay and pleafant, 
 With things long part, and things now prefent 
 
 Rivers once NYMPHS (a Transformation 
 Is mighty pretty in Relation) 
 From great Authorities vre know 
 Will snatter for a Tale beftow. 
 To make the Obfervation clear 
 We give our Friends an inftance here. 
 
 II. G Th
 
 i8 THE GHOST. 
 
 The DAY (that never is fdrgot) 
 Was very fine , but very bit ; 
 The NYMPH (another gen'ral rule) 
 Enflain'd with heat, laid down to cool ; 
 Her Hair (we no exceptions find) . 
 Wav'el carelefs floating in the wind ; 
 Her heaving brca/ls^ like Summer feas^ 
 Seem d anfrous of the playful breeze ; 
 Should /<,77<r/ DESCRIPTION tune our lays 
 In choice/I accents to her praife, 
 DESCRIPTION we at laft fhould find, 
 Baffled and weak, would halt behind. 
 NATURE had form'd her to infpire 
 In ev'ry bofom foft defire, 
 PaJJions to raife fa could not feel, 
 If^ounds to iiiflifl Jhe would not keal. 
 A GOD (his name is no great matter, 
 Perhaps a JOVE, perhaps a SATYR) 
 'Raging with Zr//?, a GODLIKE flame, 
 By chance, as ufual, thither came : 
 With gloting eyes the Fair one view'd, 
 Defir'd her firft, and then purfu'd j 
 She (for what other can (he do ?) 
 Muft fly or. how can He purfae ?
 
 THE GHOST. 19 
 
 The Mufe (fo Cuftom hath decreed) 
 
 Now proves her Spirit by her fpeed, 
 
 Nor muft one limping line dilgrace 
 
 The life and vigour of the Race. 
 
 SHE RUNS, AND HE RUNS, 'till at length, 
 
 Quite deftitute of Breath and ftrength, 
 
 To Heaven (for there we all apply 
 
 For help, when there's no other nigh) 
 
 She offers up her Virgin Pray'r, 
 
 (Can Virgins pray unpitied there ?) 
 
 And when the God thinks He has caught her* 
 
 Slips thro' his hands, and runs to water, 
 
 Becomes a Stream^ in which the POET, 
 
 If he has any Wit, may fhew it. 
 
 A City once for Pow'r renown'd, 
 Now levell'd even to the ground, 
 Beyond all doubt is a direction 
 To introduce fomefne reflection. 
 
 Ah) U'oeful tne! Ah^ woeful Man! 
 Ah ! woeful All, do all we can ! 
 Who can on earthly things depend 
 From one to t'other moment's end ? 
 
 C 2 HONOUR,
 
 20 THE GHOST. 
 
 HONOUR, WIT, GENIUS, WEALTH, and GLCRY, 
 
 Good lack! good lack! are tranfitory, 
 
 Nothing is fare and ftahle found, 
 
 The very Earth itfelf turns round. 
 
 Monarchs, nay MINISTERS muft die, 
 
 MufVntf, mufty?/W Ah, me! ah, why? 
 
 Cities themfelves in Time decay, 
 
 If Cities thus Ah> well-a-day! 
 
 If Brick and Mortar have an end, 
 
 On what can Flejh and Blood depend I 
 
 Ah woeful me ! Ah woeful Man! 
 
 Ah woeful All, do All we can! 
 
 ENGLAND (for that's at laft the Scene, 
 Tho' Worlds en Worlds mould rile between, 
 Whither we muft our courfe purfue) 
 ENGLAND mould call into review 
 Times long fince paft indeed, but not 
 By ENGLISHMEN to be forgot, 
 Tho' ENGLAND, once fo dear to Fame, 
 Sinks in GREAT BRITAIN'S dearer name. 
 
 Here could we mention Chiefs of cld v 
 In plain and rugged honour bold a 
 
 To
 
 T H E G H O S T. 21 
 
 To Virtue kind, to Vice fevere, 
 
 Strangers to Bribery and Fear, 
 
 Who kept no wretched Clans in awe, 
 
 Who .never broke or warp'd the Law ; 
 
 Patriots, whom, in her better days, 
 
 Old Rome might have been proud to raife. 
 
 Who fteady to their Country's claim, 
 
 Boldly flood up in Freedoms name, 
 
 E'en to the teeth of Tyrant Pride, 
 
 And, when they could no more, THEY DIED. 
 
 There (Jlrikmg contra/1) might we place 
 A fervile, mean, degen'rate race, 
 Hirelings, who valued nought but gold, 
 By the belt Bidder bought and fold, 
 Truants from Honour's facred Laws, 
 Betrayers of their Country's caufe, 
 The Dupes of Party, Tools of Pow'r, 
 Slaves to the Minion of an Hour, 
 Lacquies, who watch'd a Favourite's nod, 
 And took a Puppet for their God. 
 
 Sincere and honeft in our Rimes, 
 How might we praife thefe happier times ! 
 
 C 3 How
 
 22 THE GHOST. 
 
 How might the Mufe exalt her lays, 
 And wanton in a Monarch's praife ! 
 Tell of a Prince in ENGLAND born, 
 Whcfe Virtues ENGLAND'S crown adorn, 
 In Youth a pattern- unto age, 
 So Chafte, fo Pious, and fo Sage, 
 Who true to all thofe facred bands, 
 Which private happinefs demands, 
 Yet never lets them rife above 
 The Wronger ties of Public Love. 
 
 With confcious Pride fee ENGLAND 
 Our hcly Charter in her hand, 
 She waves it round, and o'er the Me 
 See Liberty and Courage fmile. 
 No more me mourns her treafures hurl'd 
 In Subfidies to all the world ; 
 No more by foreign threats difmay'd, 
 No more deceiv'd with foreign aid, 
 jShe deals out Sums to petty States,- 
 Whom Honour fcorns, and Reafon hates, 
 But, wifer by Experience grown, 
 fjnds fafety in herfelf alona. 
 
 Whilft
 
 THE GHOST. 
 
 Whilft thus, fhe cries, my children, ftan<3, 
 An honeft, valiant, native band, 
 A train'd MILITIA, brave and free, 
 True to their KING, and true to ME, 
 No foreign Hirelings mall be known, 
 Nor need we Hirelings of our own. 
 Under a juft and pious reign 
 The Statef.nan's fophiftry is vain, 
 Vain is each vile corrupt pretence, 
 Thefe are my natural defence, 
 Their Faith I know, and they (hall prove 
 The Bulwark of the KING they Lov. 
 
 Thefe, and a thoufand things befide, 
 Did we confult a Poet's Pride, 
 Some gay, fome ferious, might be faid, 
 But ten to one they'd not be read, 
 Or were they by fome curious few, 
 Not even thofe would think them true. 
 For, from the time that JUBAL rail 
 Sweet ditties to the harp rehears'd, 
 Poets have always been fufpe&ed 
 Of having Tru:h in Rime neglecled,
 
 24 THE GHOST. 
 
 That Bard except, who, from his Youth 
 Equally fam'd for Faith and Trutb y 
 By Prudence taught, in courtly chime 
 To Courtly ears, brought Truth in Rime. 
 
 But tho' to Poets we allow, 
 No matter when acquir'd or how, 
 From Truth unbounded deviation, 
 "Which cuftom calls Imagination^ 
 Yet can't they be fuppos'd to lye 
 One half fo fad as FAME can fly. 
 Therefore (to folve this Gordian knot, 
 A point we almoft had forgot) 
 To courteous Readers be it known, 
 That fond of verfe and falfhood grown, . 
 Whilft we in fweet digreffcon fung, 
 FAME check'd her flight, and held her tongue, 
 And now purfues with double force, 
 And double fpeed her deftin'd courfe, 
 Nor flops, till me the place arrives 
 Where GENIUS ftarves, and DULLNESS thrives, 
 Where Riches Virtue are efteem'd, 
 And craft is trueft Wifdom deem'd, 
 
 Where
 
 THE GHOST. 25 
 
 Where COMMERCE proudly rears her throne 
 
 In State to other Lands unknown, 
 
 Where to be cheated, and to cheat, 
 
 Strangers from ev'ry quarter meet, 
 
 Where CHRISTIANS, JEWS, and TURKS (hake hands, 
 
 United in Commercial bands, 
 
 All of one Faith ^ and that, to own 
 
 No God but INTEREST alone. 
 
 When Gods and Goddefles come down 
 To look about them here in Town, 
 (For Change of Air is underflood, 
 By Sons of Phyfic to be good, 
 In due proportions now and then 
 For thefe fame Gods as well as Men) 
 By Cuftom rul'd, and not a Poet 
 So very dull, but he muft know it, 
 In order to remain incog, 
 They always travel in a fog. 
 For if we Majefty expofe 
 To vulgar eyes, too cheap it grows, 
 The force is loft, and free from awe, 
 We Ipy and cenfure eve'ry flaw. 
 
 But
 
 2 6 THE GHOST. 
 
 But well preferv'd from public view, 
 It always breaks forth frefli and new, 
 Fierce as the Sun in all his pride, 
 It mines, and not a fpot's defcried. 
 
 Was JOVE to lay his thunder by, 
 And with his brethren of the fky 
 Defcend to earth, and frifk about, 
 Like chatt'ring N***, from rout to rout, 
 He would be found, with all his hoft, 
 A nine days Wonder at the moft. 
 Would we in trim our Honours wear, 
 We muft preferve them from the air, 
 What is familiar, Men neglecl, 
 However worthy of refpedl. 
 Did they not find a certain friend 
 In Novelty to recommend, 
 ( Such we by fad experience find 
 The wretched folly of mankind) 
 Venus might unattractive mine, 
 And H*** fix no eyes but mine. 
 
 But FAME, who never car'd a jot 
 Whether fhe was admir'd or nut, 
 
 And
 
 THEGHOST. ?7 
 
 And never blufh'd to (hew her face 
 
 At any time in any place, 
 
 In her own fhape, without difguife, 
 
 And vifible to mortal eyes, 
 
 On CHANGE, exact at feven o'clock, 
 
 Alighted on the Weather-Cock , 
 
 Which, planted there time out of mind, 
 
 To note the changes of the wind, 
 
 Might no improper emblem be 
 
 Of her own mutability. 
 
 Thrice did She found her TRUMP (the fame 
 Which from the firfl belong'd to FAME, 
 An old ill-favour' d Instrument 
 With which the Goddefs was content, 
 Tho' under a politer race 
 Sag-pipes might well fupply its place) 
 And thrice awaken'd by the found, 
 A gen'ral din prevailed around, 
 CONFUSION thro' the City paft, 
 And FEAR beftrode the dreadful blaft. 
 
 Thofe fragrant Currents^ which we meet 
 Piftilling foft thro' ev'ry ftrcet, 
 
 Affrighted
 
 28 THE GHOST. 
 
 Affrighted from the ufual courfe, 
 Ran mum* ring upwards to their fourcej 
 Statues wept tears of blood, as faft 
 As when a CJESAR breath'd his laft ; 
 Korles, which always us'd to go, 
 Afoot-pace in my Lord Mayor s Show 9 
 Impetuous from their Stable broke, 
 And ALDERMEN and OXEN fpoke. 
 
 Halls felt the force, Tvufrs fiiook around, 
 And Steeples nodded to the ground, 
 ST. PAUL himfelf (ftrange fight !) was feen 
 To bow as humbly as the Dean. 
 The Manfion-Houfe^ for ever plac'd 
 A monument of City Tafte, 
 Trembl'd, and feem'd aloud to groan 
 Thro' all that hideous weight of ftone. 
 
 To ftill the found, or flop her ears, 
 Remove the caufe or fenfe of fears, 
 PHYSIC, in College feated high, 
 Would any thing but MecCcine try. 
 No more in PEWT'RERS-HALL was heard 
 The proper force of ev'ry word, 
 
 Thofc
 
 THEGHOST. 
 
 Thofe feats were defolate become, 
 A haplefs ELOCUTION dumb. 
 FORM, City-born, and City-bred^ 
 By ftridt Decorum ever led, 
 Who threefcore years had known the grace 
 Of one, dullj Jliff, unvaried pace ; 
 TERROR prevailing over PRIDE, 
 Was feen to take a larger ftride j 
 Worn to the bone, and cloath'd in rags, 
 See AV'RICE clofer hug his bags ; 
 With her own weight unwieldy grown, 
 See CREDIT totter on her Throne; 
 VIRTUE alone, had She been there, 
 The mighty found, unmov'd, could bear. 
 
 Up from the gorgeous bed, where Fate 
 Dooms annual Fools to ileep in date, 
 To fleep To found that not one gleam 
 Of Fancy can provoke a dream, 
 Great DULLMAN ftarted at the found, 
 Gap'd, rubb'd his eyes, and ftar'd around. 
 Much did he wi/h to know, much fear 
 Whence founds fo horrid ftruck his ear,
 
 30 THE GHOST. 
 
 So much unlike thofe peaceful notes, 
 That equal harmony which floats 
 On the dull wing of City air, 
 Grave prelude to a feaft or fair j 
 Much did he inly ruminate 
 Concerning the decrees of Fate, 
 Revolving, tho* to little end, - 
 What this fame trumpet might portend* 
 
 Could the FRENCH no that could not be 
 Under BUTE'S active miniftry, 
 Too watchful to be fo deceiv'd, 
 Have ftolen hither unperceiv'd ? 
 To NEWFOUNDLAND indeed we know, 
 Fleets of war unobferv'd may go, 
 Or, if obferv'd, may be fuppos'd, 
 At intervals when Reafon doz'd, 
 No other point in view to bear 
 But Pleafure, Health, and Change of Air. 
 But Reafon ne'er could fleep fo found 
 To let an enemy be found 
 In our Land's heart, ere it was known 
 They had departed from their own. 
 
 Or
 
 T H E G H O S T. 31 
 
 -N,- 
 
 Or could his Succeffor (Ambition 
 Is ever haunted with fufpicion) 
 His daring Succeffor elel^ 
 All Cuftoms, rules, and forms reje ;>, 
 And aim, regardlefs of the crime, 
 To feize the chair before his time ; 
 
 Or (deeming this the lucky hour, 
 Seeing his Countrymen in pow'r, 
 Thofe Countrymen^ who, from the firft, 
 In tumults and Rebellion nurs'd, 
 Howe'er they wear the mafk of art, 
 Still love a STUART in their heart) 
 Could SCOTTISH CHARLES 
 
 Conjeflure thus, 
 
 That mental IGNIS FATUUS, 
 
 Led his poor brains a weary dance 
 
 From FRANCE to ENGLAND, hence to FRANCE, 
 
 'Till INFORMATION (in the fhrspe 
 
 Of Chaplain learned, good SIR CRAPE, 
 
 A lazy, lounging, pamper'd Prieft, 
 
 Well known at ev'ry City fer.it, 
 
 For
 
 32 THEGHQST. 
 
 For he was feen much oft'ner there 
 
 Than in the Houfe of God at Pray'r ; 
 
 Who always ready in his place, 
 
 Ne'er let God's creatures wait for grace, 
 
 Tho', as the beft Hiftorians write, 
 
 Lefs fam'd for Faith than Appetite, 
 
 His difpofition to reveal, 
 
 The Grace was fhort, and long the meal ; 
 
 Who always would excefs admit, 
 
 If Haunch or Turtle came with it, 
 
 And ne'er engag'd in the defence 
 
 Of felf-denying Abftinence, 
 
 When he could fortunately meet 
 
 With any thing he lik'd to eat ; 
 
 Who knew that Wine, on Scripture plan, 
 
 Was made to chear the heart of Man, 
 
 Knew too, by long experience taught, 
 
 That Chearfulnefs was kill'd by thought, 
 
 And from thole premifes collected, 
 
 (Which few perhaps would have fufpe&ed) 
 
 That none, who with due {hare of fenfe 
 
 Obferv'd the ways of Providence, 
 
 Could with fafe Confcience leave off drinking, 
 
 'Till they had loft the pow'r of thinking ; 
 
 With
 
 T H E G H O S T. 3.3 
 
 With eyes half-clos'd came waddling in, 
 And, having ftrok'd his double chin^ 
 (That Chin, whofe credit to mainta'n 
 Againft the Scoffs of the profane, 
 Had coft him more than ever State 
 Paid for a poor Elefforate^ 
 Which after all the coft and rout 
 It had been better much without) 
 Briefly (for Brcakfaft^ you muft know, 
 Was waiting all the while below) 
 Related, bowing to the ground, 
 The caufe of that uncommon found, 
 Related too, that at the door, 
 POMPOSO, PLAUSIBLE, and M E, 
 Begg'd that FAME might not be allow'd, 
 Their mame to publifh to the crowd ; 
 That fome new laws he would provide, 
 (If Old could not be mifapplied, > 
 
 With as much eafe and fafety there, 
 As they are mifapplied elfewhere) 
 Sy ivbich it might be conftrued treafon 
 In Man to exercife his reafon, 
 Which might ingenicujly devife 
 One punifhment for Truth and Lies, 
 VOL, II, D And
 
 THE GHOST. 
 
 And fairly prove, when they had done, 
 That Truth and Falfhood were but one ; 
 Which JURIES muft indeed retain, 
 But their effect fliould render vain, 
 Making all real pow'r to reft 
 In one corrupted rotten breafl^ 
 By whofe fatfe gfyft, the very BIBLE 
 Might be interpreted a Libel. 
 
 M****, (who, his Reverence to fave, 
 Pleaded the Fool to fcreen the Knave, 
 Tho' all, who witnefs'd on his part, 
 Swore for his bead againft his heart) 
 Had taken down, from firft to laft, 
 A juft account of all that pall ; 
 But, imce the gracious will of Fate^ 
 Who mark'd the child for wealth and ftate 
 E'en in the Cradle, had decreed 
 The mighty DuLLMAN ne'er fliould read, 
 That office of dif grace to bear 
 The fnu*tl r lip* d PLAUSIBLE was there. 
 From H***** e'en to CLERKENWELL 
 Who knowb \\Q\. jnmtl-Hp* d PLAUSIBLE ?
 
 T H E G H O S T. 35 
 
 A Preacher deem'd of greate:"!: note, 
 For Preaching that which others wrote. 
 
 Had DULL MAN now (and Fools we fee 
 Seldom want Curiofiry) 
 Confented (but the mourning jhade, 
 Of GASCOYNE haft'ned to his aid, 
 And in his hand, what could he more ? ; 
 Triumphant CANNING'S Picture bore) 
 That our three Heroes mould advance 
 And read their Comical Romance^ 
 How rich a feaft, what royal fare 
 We for our Readers might prepare \ 
 So rich, and yet fo fafe a feaft, 
 That no one foreign blatant beaft, 
 Within tine purlieus of the Law y 
 Should dare thereon to lay his paw, 
 And, growling, cry, with furly tone, 
 Keep off this ftaji is all my own* 
 
 Bending to earth the downcaft eye, 
 Or planting it againft the fty, 
 As One immers'd in deepeft Thought, 
 Or with fome holy Vifion caught, 
 
 D 2 His
 
 THE GHOST. 
 
 His Hands, to aid the traitor's art, 
 
 Devoutly folded o'er his heart. 
 
 Here M****, in fraud well fkill'd, fliould go 
 
 Jill Saint, with folemn ftep and flow. 
 
 O that RELIGION'S facred name,. 
 
 Meant to infpire the pureft flame,, 
 
 A Proftitute (hould ever be 
 
 To that Archfiend. HYPOCRISY, 
 
 Where we find ev'ry other vice 
 
 Crown'd with damn* d fneaking Cowardice / 
 
 Bold Sin reclaim'd is often feen ; 
 
 Paft hope that Man, who flares be mean. 
 
 There, full of fiejh, and full of Grace, 
 With thztfae round unmeaning face, 
 Which NATURE gives to fons of earth, 
 Whom (he defigns for eafe and mirth, 
 Should the prim PLAUSIBLE be fee^ 
 Obferve his ftiff affecled mien j 
 'Gainft NATURE, arm'd by GRAVITY, 
 His Features too in buckle fee ; 
 See with what Sanctity he reads, 
 With what Devotion tells his beads.! 
 
 Now
 
 T H E G H O S T. 37 
 
 Now Prophet, mew me, by thine art, 
 What's the Religion of his heart ; 
 Shew there, if Truth thou can'ft unfold, 
 Religion center'd all in Gold, 
 Shew Him, nor fear Correction's rod, 
 As falfe to Friend/hip, as to GOD. 
 
 Horrid, unweildy, without Form, 
 Savage, as OCEAN in a Storm, 
 Of fize prodigious, in the rear, 
 That Pojl of Honour, mould appear 
 POMPOSO ; Fame around mould tell 
 How he a flave to int'reft fell, 
 How, for Integrity renown'd, 
 Which Bookfellers have often found, 
 He for Subfcribers baits his hook, 
 And takes their cafh but where's the Book r 
 No matter where Wife Fear, we know, 
 Forbids the robbing of a Foe ; 
 But what, to ferve our private ends, 
 Forbids the cheating of our friends ? 
 No Man alive, who would not fwear 
 .All's faff, and therefore boneji there. 
 
 D 3 For
 
 3 8 T H E G H O S T. 
 
 For, fpite of all the learned fay., 
 If we to Truth attention pay, 
 The word Dijhanefty is meant 
 For nothing elfe but Puni foment, 
 fame too mould tell, nor heed the threat 
 Of Rogues, who Brother Rogues abet, 
 Nor tremble at the terrors hung 
 Aloft, to make her hold her tongue^ 
 How to all Principles untrue, 
 Not fix'd to old Friends, nor to New y 
 He damns the Penfion which he takes, 
 And loves the STUART he forfakes. 
 NATURE (who juftly regular 
 Is very feldom known to err, 
 But now and then mfporthe msod, 
 As fome rude wits have underftood, 
 Or through much ivork required in hflfte^ 
 Is with a random ftroke difgrac'd) 
 POMPOSO form'd on doubtful plan, 
 Not quite a Beoj}, nor quite a Man^ 
 Like God knoivs ivhzt for never yet 
 Could the moft fubtle human Wit 
 Find out a Monfter, which might be 
 The Shadow of a Simile. 
 
 THESE
 
 THE GHOST. 39 
 
 THESE THREE, THESE GREAT, THESE MIGHTY 
 Nor can the Poet's Truth agree, [THREE, 
 
 Howe'er Report hath done him wrong, 
 And warp'd the purpofe of his fong, 
 Amongft the refufe of their Race, 
 The Sons of Infamy to place, 
 That open, gen'rous, manly mind, 
 Which we with joy in ALDRICH rind. 
 THESE THREE, who now yet faintly fhewn, 
 *JuJl Jketclfd) and fcarcely to be knoWxi, 
 If DULLMAN their Requeft had heard, 
 In ftronger Colours had appear 'd, 
 And Friends, tho' partial, at firft'view, 
 ShudcTHng) had own'd the picture true. 
 
 But had their Journal been difplay'd, 
 
 And the whole procefs open laid, 
 
 What a van: unexhaufted field 
 
 For Mirth, muft fuch a Journal yield ! 
 
 In her own anger ftrongly charm'd, 
 
 'Gainft hope, 'gainft Fear by Confcience arm'd, 
 
 Then had bold SATIRE made her way, 
 
 Knights, Lords, and Dukes, her deftin'd prey. 
 
 D A But
 
 40 T fJ E G H Q S T. 
 
 But Prudence, ever facred name 
 To thofe who feel not VIRTUE'S flame, 
 Or only feel it at the beft 
 As the dull dupe of Intereft, 
 Whifper'd aloud (for this we find 
 A Cuftjm current with Mankind, 
 So loud to Whifper, that each word 
 May all around be plainly heard, 
 And Prudence fure would never mifs 
 A Cuftom fo contriv'd as this 
 Her Candour to fecure ; yet aim, 
 Sure Death againft another's fame) 
 Knights* Lords, and Dukes mad wretch, forbear, 
 Dangers unthought of ambum there ; 
 Confine thy rage to weaker flaves, 
 Laugh z\.fmall Fools, and \zft\fmall Knaves, 
 But never, helplefs, mean, and poor, 
 Rum on, where Laws cannot fecure, 
 Nor think thyfelf, miftaken Youth, 
 Secure in Principles of Truth ; 
 Truth! why, fhall ev'ry wretch of Letters 
 Dare to fpeak Truth againft his Betters ! 
 Let ragged VIRTUE flanci aloof, 
 Nor mutter accents of reproof > 
 
 Let
 
 THE GHOST. 4 r 
 
 Let ragged WIT a Mute become, 
 
 When Wealth and Pow'r would have her dumb. 
 
 For who the Devil doth not know, 
 
 That Titles and Eftates bellow 
 
 An ample ftock, where'er they fall, 
 
 Of Graces which we mental call ? 
 
 Beggars, in ev'ry age and nation, 
 
 Are R'ogues and Fools by Situation ; 
 
 The .Rich and Great are underftood 
 
 To be of Courfe both wife and good. 
 
 Confult then Int'refc more than Pride, 
 
 Difcreetly take the ftronger fide, 
 
 Defert in Time the fimple few, 
 
 Who Virtues barren path purfue, 
 
 Adopt my maxims follow Me 
 
 To BAAL bow the prudent knee ; 
 Deny thy God, betray thy Friend, 
 At BAAL'S altars hourly bend, 
 So (halt Thou rich and great be fccn ; 
 To be Great now, You mull be mean. 
 
 Hence, Tempter, to forne weaker Soul, 
 Which Fear and Intereit controul j 
 
 Vainly
 
 42 THE GHOST. 
 
 Vainly thy precepts are addrefs'd, 
 Where VIRTUE fteels the fieady breaft. 
 Thro' Meannefs wade to boafted pow'r, 
 Through Guilt repeated ev'ry hour ; 
 ' What is thy Gain, when all is done, 
 What, mighty laurels haft Thou won ? 
 Dull Crowds, to whom the heart's unknown, 
 Praife Thee for Virtues not thy own ; 
 But will, at once Man's fcourge and friend, 
 Impartial CONSCIENCE too commend? 
 From her Reproaches can'ft thou fly ? 
 Can'ft Thou with worlds her filence buy ? 
 Believe h not her ftings fliall find 
 A PafTage to thy Coward Mind. 
 There (hall (he fix her (harped dart, 
 There (hew Thee truly, as Tfiou art y 
 Unknown to thofe, by whom Thourt priz'ft; 
 Known to thyfelf to be defyis'd. 
 
 The Man, who weds the facred MUSK, 
 Difdains all mercenary views, 
 And He, who VIRTUE'S throne would rear. 
 Laughs at the Phantoms rais'd by Fear. 
 
 Tho'
 
 THEGHOST. 43 
 
 Tho' Folly ) rob'd in Purple, mines, 
 Tho' Vice exhaufts Peruvian mines, 
 Yet mall they tremble, and turn pale, 
 When SATIRE wields her mighty Flail ; 
 Or mould They, of rebuke afraid, 
 With MELCOMBE feek Hell's deepefi made, 
 SATIRE, ftill mindful of her aim, 
 Shall bring the Cowards back to Shame. 
 
 Hated by many, lov'd by few, 
 Above each little private view, 
 Honed, tho' poor, (and who mall dare 
 To difappoint my boafting there ?) 
 Hardy and refolute, tho' weak, 
 The dictates of my heart to fpeak, 
 Willing I bend at SATIRE'S Throne ; 
 What Pow'r I have, be all her own. 
 
 Nor mall yon Lawyer's fpecious art, 
 Confcious of a corrupted heart, 
 Create imaginary Fear 
 To damp us in our bold Career. 
 Why fhou.ld we Fear ; and what ? the Laws ? 
 They all arc arm'd in VIRTUE'S caufe. 
 
 And
 
 44 THE GHOST. 
 
 And aiming at the felf-fame end, 
 SATIRE is always VIRTUE'S Friend, 
 Nor (hall that Mufe, whofe honed rage, 
 In a corrupt degen'rate age, 
 (When, dead to ev'ry nicer fenfe, 
 Deep funk in Vice and Indolence, 
 The SPIRIT of old ROME was broke 
 Beneath the Tyrant Filler's yoke) 
 Banifh'd the Rofe from Nero's cheek ; 
 Under a BRUNSWICK fear to fpeak. 
 
 Drawn by Conceit from REASON'S plan, 
 How vain is that poor Creature, MAN ! 
 How pleas'd is ev ? ry paultry elf 
 To prate about that thing himfelf ! 
 After my Promife made in Rime, 
 And meant in earneft at that time, 
 To jog, according to the Mode, 
 In one dull pace, in one dull road, 
 What but that Curfe of Heart and Head 
 To this digreffion could have led, x 
 Where plung'd, in vain I look about, 
 And can't ftay in, nor well get out. 
 
 Could
 
 THEGHOST. 45 
 
 Could I, whilft Humour held the Quill, 
 Could I digrefs with half that fkili, 
 Could I with half that fkill return, 
 Which we fo much admire in STERNE, 
 Where each DigreJJion^ feeming vain, 
 And only fit to entertain, 
 Is found, on better recollection, 
 To have a juft and nice Connection, 
 To help the whole with wond'rous art, 
 Whence it feems idly to depart ; 
 Then mould our readers ne'er accule 
 Thefe wild excurfions of the Mirfe, 
 Ne'er backward turn dull Pages o'er 
 To recollect what went before ; 
 Deeply imprefs'd, and ever new, 
 Each Image paft mould ftart to view, 
 And We to DULLMAN now come in, 
 As if we ne'er had abfent been. 
 
 Have you not feen, when danger's near, 
 The coward cheek turn white with fear ? 
 Have you not feen, when danger's fled,. 
 The felf-fame cheek with joy turn red? 
 
 Thefe
 
 46 THEGHOST. 
 
 Thefe are low fymptoms which we find 
 
 Fit only for a vulgar mind, 
 
 Where honeft features, void of art, 
 
 Betray the feelings of the heart ; 
 
 Our DULLMAN with a face was blefs'd 
 
 Where no one pafllon was exprefs'd, 
 
 His eye, in a fineflupor caught, 
 
 Imply'd a plenteous lack of thought : 
 
 Nor was one line that whole face feen in, 
 
 Which could be juftly charg'd with meaning. 
 
 To AVARICE by lirtb ally'd, 
 Debauch'd by Marriage into Pride, 
 In age grown fond of youthful fports, 
 Of Pomps, of Vanities, and Courts, 
 And by fuccefs too mighty made, 
 To love his Country or his Trade, 
 Stiff in opinion (no rare cafe 
 With Blockheads in, or out of Place) 
 Too weak, and iniblent of Soul, 
 To fuffer Reafon's juft controul, 
 But bending, of his own accord, 
 To that trim tranjient toy^ MY LORD ; 
 
 The
 
 T H E G H O S T. 47 
 
 The dupe of SCOTS (a fatal race, 
 
 Whom GOD in ivratb contriv'd to place, 
 
 To fcourge our crimes, and gall our pride, 
 
 A conftant thorn in ENGLAND'S fide, 
 
 Whom firft, our greatnefs to oppofe, 
 
 Fie in his vengeance mark'd for foes ; 
 
 Then, mpre to ferve his wrathful ends, 
 
 And more to curfe us, mark'd for Friends) 
 
 Deep in the ftate, if we give' credit 
 
 To HIM, for no one elfe e'er laid it, 
 
 Sworn friend of great Ones not a few, 
 
 Tho' he their Titles only knew, 
 
 And thofe (which envious of his breeding 
 
 Bsok-wprms have charg'd to want of reading) 
 
 Merely to mew himfelf polite 
 
 He never would pronounce aright ;. 
 
 An Orator with whom a hoft 
 
 Of thofe which ROME and ATHENS bc'riir, 
 
 In all their Pride might riot contend, 
 
 Who, with no Pow'rs to recommend, 
 
 Whilil JACKEY HUME, and BILLY WHITSHBAJJ, 
 
 And DICKEY GLOVER fat delighted, 
 
 Could fpeak whole days in Nature's fpite, 
 
 Jufc as thofe able Verfe-men write, 
 
 Great
 
 48 THEGHOST. 
 
 Great DULL MAN from his bed arofe 
 Thrice did he fpit thrice wip'd his nofe 
 Thrice ftrove to fmile thrice ftrove to frown 
 And thrice look'd up and thrice look'd down 
 Then Silence broke CRAPE, who am I ? 
 CRAPE bow'd, and fmil'd an arch reply, 
 Am I not CRAPE ? I am, you know, 
 < Above all thofe who are below. 
 
 Have I not knowledge ? and for 7^7/, 
 
 Money will always purchafe it, 
 
 Nor, if it needful mould be found, 
 
 Will I grudge ten, or twenty Pound, 
 
 For which the whole ftock may be bought 
 
 Of fcoundrel wits not worth a Groat. 
 
 But left I fliould proceed too far, 
 
 I'll feel my Friend the Minijler^ 
 
 (Great Men, CRAPE, muft not be neglected) 
 
 How he in this point is affe&ed, 
 
 For, as I ftand a magiftrate, 
 
 To ferve him firft, and next the State, 
 
 Perhaps he may not think it fit 
 
 To let his snagiftrates have wit. 
 
 Boaft
 
 THE- GHOST. 49 
 
 Boaft I not, at this very hour, 
 Thofe large effects which troop with pow'r ? 
 Am I not mighty in the land ? 
 Do not I fit, whilft others ftand ? 
 Am I not with rich garments grac'd, 
 In feat of honour always plac'd ? 
 And do not Cits of chief degree, 
 Tho' proud to others, bend to me ? 
 
 Have I not, as a JUSTICE ought, 
 The laws fuch wholefome rigour taught, 
 That Fornication, in difgrace, 
 Is now afraid to mew her face, 
 And not one Whore thefe walls approaches 
 Unlefs they ride in our own coaches ? 
 And mall this FAME, an old poor Strumpet, 
 Without our Licence found her Trumpet, 
 And, envious of our City's quiet, 
 In broad Day-light blow up a Riot ? 
 If infolence like this we bear, 
 Where is our State? our office where? 
 Farewell all honours of our reign, 
 Farewell the Neck ennobling CHAIN, 
 
 VOL. II. E Freedom's
 
 J0 T H E G H O'S T. 
 
 Freedom's known badge o'er all the globe, 
 Farewell fix folemn-fpreading ROBE, 
 Farewell the SWORD, -farewell the MACE, 
 Farewell & TITLE, POMP, and PLACE. 
 Remov'd from Men of high degree, 
 (A iofs to them, CRAPE, not to Me) 
 Banim'd to CHJPPENHAM, or to FROME, 
 DULLMAN once more (hall ply the Loom. 
 
 CRAPE, lifting up his hands and eyes, 
 DULLMAN the Loom** CHIPPENHAM crie^ 
 If there be Pow'rs wliich greatnefs love, 
 Which rule below^ but dwell above, 
 Thofe Pow'rs united all (hall join 
 To contradict the ram defign. 
 
 Sooner (hall ftubborn WILL lay down 
 His oppofition with his Gown, 
 Sooner (hall TEMPLE leave the road 
 Which leads to VIRTUE'S mean abode, 
 Sooner (hall SCOTS this Country quit, 
 And ENGLAND'S Foes be Friends to PITT, 
 Than DULLMAN, from his grandeur thrown, 
 Shall wander out-caft, and unknown. 
 
 Sure
 
 THE GHOST. 51 
 
 Sure as that Cane (a Cane there flood 
 Near to a Table, made of Wood, 
 Of dry fine Wood a table made, 
 By fome rare artift in the trade, 
 Who had enjoy'd immortal praife 
 If he had liv'd in HOMER'S days.) 
 Sure as that Cane, which once was feen 
 In pride of life all frefli and green, 
 The banks of INDUS to adorn j 
 Then, of its leafy honours (horn, 
 According to exacleft rule, 
 Was famion'd by the workman's tool. 
 And which at prefent we behold 
 Curioujly polim'd, crown'd with gold, 
 With gold well-wrought ; fure as that Cant, 
 Shall never on its native plain 
 Strike root afrefli, mail never more 
 Flourifh in Tawny INDIA'S more, 
 So fure mall DULLMAN and his race 
 To lateft times this ftation grace, 
 
 DULLMAN, who all this while had kept 
 His eye-lids clos'd as if He flept, 
 
 E 2 Now
 
 52 T H E G H O S T. 
 
 Now looking 1 fteadfaftly on CRAPE, 
 As at fome God in human ihape 
 CRAPE, I proteft, you feem to me 
 To have difcharg'd a Prophecy ; 
 ' Tes from the fipft it doth appear 
 
 Planted by FATE, the DULL MANS berr 
 Have always held a quiet reign, 
 And here mall ta the laft remain. 
 
 CRAPE, they're all wrong about this G/5>5/? * 
 Quite' on the wrong fide of the Poft 
 Blockheads to take it in their head 
 To be a meflage from the dead,. 
 For that by MlJJion they defign, 
 A word not half fo good as mine. 
 CRAPE here it is flart not one doubt 
 A Plot a Plot I've found it out, 
 
 O God! cries CRAPE, how bleft the nation-, 
 Where one Son boafts fuch penetration ! 
 
 CRAPE, I've not time to tell you now 
 When I difcover'd. this, or bow j 
 
 To
 
 THE GHOST. 53 
 
 To STENTOR go if he's not there, 
 His place let Bully NORTON bear 
 Our Citizens to Council to call 
 Let All meet 'tis the caufe of All. 
 Let the three Witnefles attend 
 With Allegations to befriend, 
 To fvvear juft fo much, and no more, 
 As We inftrucl: them in before. 
 
 Stay CRAPE come back what, don't you fee 
 Th' effec"ls of this .difcovery ? 
 DuLLMANall care and toil endures 
 The Profit, CRAPE, will all be Yours. 
 A Mitre (for, this arduous tafk 
 Perform'd, they'll grant whate'er I afk) 
 A Mitre (and -perhaps the bcft) 
 Shall thro' my Intereft make thee bleft. 
 And at this time, when gracious FATE 
 Dooms to the Scot the reigns of State, 
 Who is more fit (and for your ufe 
 We could fome inftances produce) 
 Of ENGLAND'S Church to be the Head^ 
 Than You, a Pre/bytenan bred ? 
 
 E 3 But
 
 54 THE GHOST. 
 
 But when thus mighty you are made, 
 Unlike the Brethren of thy trade, 
 Be grateful, CRAPE, and let Me not, 
 Like Old NEWCASTLE, be forgot. 
 
 But an Affair, CRAPE, of this fize 
 Will afk from Conduft vaft fupplies j 
 It muft not, as the Vulgar fay, 
 Be done in Hugger Mugger way. 
 Traitors indeed (and that's difcreet) 
 Who hatch the Plot, in private meet j 
 They fliould in Public go, no doubt, 
 Whofe bufinefs is to find it out. 
 
 To-morrow if the day appear 
 Likely to turn out fair and clear 
 Proclaim a Grand Proceffionade 
 Be all the City Pomp difplay'd, 
 Let the Train-bands CRAPE fhook his head 
 They heard the Trumpet and were fled 
 Well cries the Knight if that's the cafe, 
 My Servants (hall fupply their place 
 My Servants mine alone no more 
 Than what my Servants did before 
 
 Doft
 
 THE GHOST. 55 
 
 Doft not remember, CRAPE, that day, 
 When, DULLMAN'S grandeur to difplay, 
 As all too fimple, and too low, 
 Our City Friends were thruft below, 
 Whilft, as more worthy of our Love, 
 Courtiers were entertain'd above ? 
 Tell me, who waited then ? and how ? 
 My Servants mine and why not now ? 
 In hafte then, CRAPE, to STENTOR go 
 But fend up HART who waits below, 
 With him, 'till You return again 
 (Reach me my Spectacles and Cane) 
 I'll make a proof how I advance in 
 My new accompli fhment of dancing. 
 
 Not quite fo faft: as Lightning flies, 
 Wing'd with red anger, thro' the fkies j 
 Not quite fo faft as, fent by JOVE, 
 IRIS defcends on wings of Love ; 
 Not quite fo faft as TERROR rides 
 When He the charing winds beftrides ; 
 CRAPE Hobbled but his mind was good 
 Cou'd he go fafter than He cou'd ? 
 
 E 4 Near
 
 5 6 THE GHOST. 
 
 Near to that 70ti/V, which, as we're told, 
 The mighty JULIUS rais'd of old, 
 Where to the block by Juftice led, 
 The Rebel SCOT hath often bled, 
 Where Anns are kept fo clean, fo bright, 
 'Twere Sin they fliould be foil'd in fight, 
 Where Brutes of foreign race are (hewn 
 Ey Brutes much greater of our own, 
 Faft by the crouded Thames, is found 
 An ample fquare of facred ground, 
 Where artlefs Eloquence prefides, 
 And Nature ev'ry fentence guides. 
 
 Here Female Parliaments debate 
 About Religion, Trade, and State, 
 Here ev'ry NAIAD'S Patriot foul, 
 Difdaining Foreign bafe controul, 
 Defpifmg French^ defpifmg Erfe, 
 Pours forth the plain Old Engl'ijh Curfe, 
 And bears aloft, with terrors hung, 
 The Honours of the Vulgar Tongue. 
 
 Here STENTOR, always heard with awe, 
 In thund'ring accents deals out Law. 
 
 Twelve
 
 THE GHOST. 57 
 
 Twelve Furlongs off each dreadful word 
 Was plainly and diftin&ly heard, 
 And ev'ry neighbour hill around 
 Return'd and fwell'd the mighty found. 
 The loudeft Virgin of the ftream, 
 Compar'd with him, would filent feem ; 
 THAMES (who, enrag'd to find his courfc 
 Oppos'd, rolls down with double force, 
 Againft the Bridge indignant roars, 
 And lafhes the refounding (Lores) 
 Compar'd with bim^ at lowed Tide, 
 In fofteft whifpers feems to glide. 
 
 Hither directed by the noife, 
 S well'd with the hope of future joys, 
 Thro' too much zeal and hafle made lame, 
 The Rev 'rend flave of DULLMAN came. 
 
 STENTOR with fuch a ferious air, 
 With fuch a face of folemn care, 
 As might import him to contain 
 A Nation's welfare in his brain 
 STENTOR cries CRAPE I'm hither fent 
 On bufinefs of mofl high intent, 
 
 Great
 
 5 8 THE GHOST. 
 
 Great DULLMAN'S orders to convey j 
 DULLMAN commands, and I obey. 
 Big with thofe throes which Patriots feel, 
 And lab'ring for the common weal, 
 Some fecret which forbids him reft, 
 Tumbles and Tvffe s in his bread, 
 Tumb.es and Tojfes to get free ; 
 And thus the Chief commands by Me. 
 
 To-morrow if the Day appear 
 Likely to turn out fair and clear. 
 Proclaim a Grand ProceJJlonade 
 Be all the City Pomp difplay'd 
 Our Citizens to Council call 
 Let All meet 'tis the Caufe of All 
 
 EtfD OF THE THIRD BOOK.
 
 THE 
 
 GHOST. 
 
 BOOK IV. 
 
 COXCOMBS, who vainly make pretence 
 
 To fomething of exalted fenfe 
 J J3ove other men, and, gravely wife,, 
 AffecT: thofe pleafures to defpife, 
 Which, merely to the eye conrin'd, 
 Bring no improvement to the mind, 
 Rail at all pomp ; They would not go 
 For millions to a Puppet-Show^ 
 
 Nor
 
 60 THE GHOST. 
 
 Nor can forgive the mighty crime 
 Of countenancing Pantomime j 
 No, not at COVENT-GARDEN, where, 
 Without a head for play or play'r, 
 Or, could a head be found tnoft fit, 
 Without one play'r to fecond it, 
 They muft, obeying Pollys call, 
 Thrive by mere mew, or not at all. 
 
 With \hzkgrave Fops, who (blefs their brains, 
 Moft cruel to themfelves, take pains 
 For wretchednefs, and would be thought 
 Much wifer than a wife man ought 
 For his own happinefs to be, 
 Who, what they hear, and what they fee, 
 And what they fmell, and tafte, and feel, 
 Diftruft, till REASON fets her feal, 
 And, by long trains of confequences 
 Enfur'd, gives Sanction to the Senfes ; 
 Who would not, Heav'n forbid it ! waftc 
 One hour in what the World calls Tafte, 
 Nor fondly deign to laugh or cry 
 Unlefs they know fome reafon why ; 
 
 With
 
 T H E G H O S T. 6r 
 
 With thefe grave Fops, whofe fyftem feems 
 
 To give up Certainty for dreams, 
 
 The Eye of Man is underftood 
 
 As for no other purpofe good 
 
 Than as a door, thro' which of courfe 
 
 Their palTage crouding obje&s force, 
 
 A downright Ufher, to admit 
 
 New-Comers to the Court of Wit. . 
 
 (Good GRAVITY, forbear thy fpleen 
 
 When I fay Wit, I Wfdam mean.) 
 
 Where (fuch the practice of the Court, 
 
 Which legal Precedents fupport) 
 
 Not one Idea is allow'd 
 
 To pafs unqueftion'd in the crowd, 
 
 But e're It can obtain the grace 
 
 Of holding in the brain a place, 
 
 Before the Chief in Congregation 
 
 Muft (land iftritt Examination, 
 
 Not fuch as 77;0/, who PHYSIC twirl, 
 Full fraught with death, from ev'ry curl, 
 Who prove, with all becoming State, 
 Their voice to be the voice of Fate, 
 
 Prepar'd
 
 62 THE GHOST. 
 
 Prepar'd with EJJence^ Drop, and Pill, 
 
 To be another WARD, or HILL, 
 
 Before they can obtain their Ends, 
 
 To fign Death-warrants for their Friends, 
 
 And talents vaft as their's employ, 
 
 Secundem Artem to deftroy, 
 
 Muft pafs (or Laws their rage reftrain) 
 
 Before the Chiefs of Warwick-Lane. 
 
 Thrice happy Lane, where uncontroul'd, 
 
 In Pow"r and Lethargy grown old, 
 
 Moft fit to take, in this bieft Land, 
 
 The reins which fell from WYNDHAM'S hand, 
 
 Her lawful throne great DULLNESS rears, 
 
 Still more herfelf as more in Years ; 
 
 Where She (and who (hall dare deny 
 
 Her right, when REEVES and CHAUNCY'S by) 
 
 Calling to mind, in ancient time, 
 
 One GARTH who err'd in Wit and Rime, 
 
 Ordains from henceforth to admit 
 
 None of the rebel Sons of Wit, 
 
 And makes it her peculiar care 
 
 That SCHOMBERG never (hall be there, 
 
 Nog
 
 THE GHOST. 
 
 Not fuch as Thofe, whom FOLLY trains 
 To Letters, tho' unblefs'd with brains, 
 Who deftitute of pow'r and will 
 To learn, are kept to learning ftill ; 
 Whofe heads, when other methods fail, 
 Receive inftruclion from the tail, 
 Becaufe their Sires, a common cafe 
 Which brings the Children to difgrace, 
 Imagine it a certain rule, 
 They never could beget a Tool, 
 Muft pafs, or muft compound for , e're 
 The Chaplain full of beef and pray'r, 
 Will give his reverend Permit, 
 Announcing them for Orders fit, 
 So that the Prelate (what's a Name ? 
 All Prelates now are much the fame) 
 May with a confcience fafe and quiet, 
 With holy hands lay on that Fiat, 
 Which doth all faculties difpenfe, 
 MSanflity, all Faith, all Senfe, 
 Makes MADAN quite a Saint appear, 
 And makes an Oracle of CHE ERE. 
 
 Not
 
 64 T H E G H O S T. 
 
 Not fuch as in that folemn feat, 
 Where the nine Ladies hold retreat, 
 The Ladies nine, who, as we're told, 
 Scorning thofe haunts they lov'd of old, 
 The banks of Isis now prefer, 
 Nor will one hour from OXFORD ftir, 
 Are held for form ; which BALAAM'S Afs 
 As well as BALAAM'S felf might pafs, 
 And with his Mafter take degrees, 
 Could he contrive to pay the Fees. 
 
 Men of found parts, who, deeply read, 
 O'erload the Storehoufe of the head 
 With furniture they ne'er can ufe, 
 Cannot forgive our rambling Mufe 
 This wild excursion ; cannot fee 
 Why Phyfic and Divinity, 
 To the furprize of all beholders, 
 Are lugg'd in by the head and moulders ; 
 Or how, in any point of view, 
 OXFORD hath any thing to do ; 
 But Men of nice and fubtle Learning, 
 Remarkable for quick difcerning, 
 
 Thro'
 
 THE GHOST. 65 
 
 Thro' Spectacles of critic mould, 
 Without inftruclion, will behold 
 That We a Method here have got, 
 To fliew What is, by What is not, 
 And that our drift (Parenthefa 
 For once apart) is briefly this. 
 
 Within the brain's moft fecret cells, 
 A certain Lord Chief Jujiice dwells 
 Of fov'reign pow'r$ whom One and All, 
 With common Voice, We REASON call j 
 Tho', for the purpofes of Satire, 
 A name in Truth is no great Matter, 
 JEFFERIES or MANSFIELD, which You will, 
 It means a Lord Chief Jit/lice ftill. 
 Here, fo our great Projectors fay, 
 The Senfes all muft homage pay, 
 Hither They all muft tribute bring, 
 And proftrate fall before their King. 
 Whatever unto them is brought, 
 Is carry'd on the wings of Thought 
 Before his throne, where, in fuil ftate, 
 He on their merits ho'cls debate, 
 
 VOL. II. F Examines,
 
 66 T H E G H O S T. 
 
 Examines, Crofs-examines, Weighs 
 Their right to cenfure or to praife ; 
 Nor doth his equal voice depend 
 On narrow Views of foe and friend, 
 Nor can or flattery or force 
 Divert him from his fteady courfe j 
 The Channel of Enquiry's clear, 
 Nojkam Examinations here. 
 
 He, upright Jufticer, no doubt, 
 Ad libitum puts in and out, 
 Adjufts and fettles in a trice 
 What Virtue is, and What is Vice^ 
 What is Perfection, what Defeft, 
 What we muft chufe, and what rejedlj 
 He takes upon him to explain 
 What Pleafure is, and what is Pain, 
 Whilft We, obedient to the Whim, 
 And refting all our faith on him, 
 True Members of the Stoic weal, 
 Muft learn to think, and ceafe to feel. 
 
 This glorious Syftem form'd, for Man 
 To pradife when and how he can, 
 
 If
 
 THE GHOST. 67 
 
 If the five Senfes in alliance 
 
 To Reafon hurl a proud defiance, 
 
 And, tho' oft conquer 'd, yet unbroke, 
 
 Endeavour to throw off that yoke, 
 
 Which they a greater flav'ry hold, 
 
 Than Jewim Bondage was of old ; 
 
 Or if They, fomething touch'd with fliame, 
 
 Allow him to retain the name 
 
 Of Royalty, and, as in Sportj 
 
 To hold a mimic formal Court ; 
 
 Permitted, no uncommon thing, 
 
 To be a kind of Puppet King, 
 
 And fuffer'd by the way of toy, 
 
 To hold a globe, but not employ ; 
 
 Our Syjtem-mongers, ftruck with fear, 
 
 Prognofticate ciefrru&ion near ; 
 
 All things to Anarchy muft run ; 
 
 The little World of Man's undone. 
 
 Nay fliould the Eye, that niceft Senfe, 
 Negle& to fend intelligence 
 Unto the Brain, diftincl: and clear, 
 Of all that pafles in her fphere, 
 
 F 2 Should
 
 68 THE GHOST. 
 
 Should She prefumptuous joy receive, 
 Without the Underftandirig's leave, 
 They deem it rank and daring Treafon 
 Againft the Monarchy of REASON, 
 Not thinking, tho' they're wondrous wife, 
 That few have Reafon^ moft have Eyes ; 
 So that the Pleafures of the Mind 
 To a fmall circle are confin'd, 
 Whilft thofe which to the Senfes fall, 
 Become the- Property of All. 
 Befides (and this is fure a Cafe 
 Not much at prefent out of place) 
 Where NATURE Reafon doth deny, 
 No Art can that defecl fupply, 
 But if (for it is our intent 
 Fairly to ftate the argument) 
 A Man (hould want an eye or two, 
 The Remedy is fure, tho' new ; 
 The Cure's at hand no need of Fear 
 For proof behold the CHEVALIER 
 As well prepar'd, beyond all doubt, 
 To put Eyes in, as put them out. 
 
 But,
 
 T H E G H O S T. 69 
 
 But, Argument apart, which tends 
 T' embitter foes and fep'rate friends, 
 (Nor, turn'd apoftate for the Nine, 
 Would I, tho' bred up a Divine, 
 And foe of courfe to Reafon's weal, 
 Widen that breach I cannot heal) 
 By his own Senfe and Feelings taught, 
 In fpeech as lib'ral as in thought, 
 Let ev'ry Man enjoy his whim ; 
 What's He to Me, or I to him ? 
 Might I, tho' never rob'd in Ermine, 
 A matter of this weight determine, 
 No Penalties mould fettled be 
 To force men to Hypocrify, 
 To make them ape an aukward zeal, 
 And, feeling not, pretend to feel. 
 I would not have, might fentence reft 
 Finally fix'd within my breaft, 
 E'en AN NET cenfur'd and confin'd, 
 Becaufe we're of a diff'rent mind. 
 > ' 
 
 NATURE, who in her act moft free, 
 Herfelf delights in Liberty, 
 
 F 3 Profule
 
 7 o THE GHOST. 
 
 Profufe in Love, and, without bound, 
 Pours joy on ev'ry creature round ; 
 Whom yet, was ev'ry bounty (bed 
 In double Portions on our head, 
 We could not truly bounteous call, 
 If FREEDOM did not crown them all. 
 
 By Providence forbid to ftray, 
 Brutes never can miftake their way, 
 Determin'd ftill, they plod along 
 By InftincT:, neither right nor wrong ; 
 But Man, had he the heart to ufe 
 His Freedom, hath a right to chufe, 
 Whether he acls or well, or ill, 
 Depends entirely on his will j 
 To her laft work, her fav'rite Man, 
 Is giv'n on NATURE'S better plan 
 A Privilege in pow'r to err, 
 Nor let this phrafe refentment ftir 
 Amongft the grave ones, fmce indeed, 
 The little merit Man can plead 
 In doing well, dependeth ftill 
 Upon his pow'r of doing ill. 
 
 Opinions
 
 THE GHOST. 71 
 
 Opinions fhould be free as air ; 
 No man, whate'er his rank, whate'er 
 His Qualities, a claim can found 
 That my Opinion muft be bound, 
 And fquare with his j fuch llavifh chains 
 From foes the lib'ral foul difdains, 
 Nor can, tho' true to friendfhip, bend 
 To wear them even from a friend. 
 Let Thofe, who rigid Judgment own, 
 Submiflive bow at Judgment's throne, 
 And if They of no value hold 
 Pleafure, till Pleafure is grown cold, 
 Pall'd and infipid, forc'-d to wait 
 For Judgment's regular debate, 
 To give it warrant, let them find 
 Dull Subjects fuited to their mind ; 
 Their's be flow Wifidom ; Be my plan 
 To live as merry as I can, 
 Regardlefs as the fafhions go, 
 Whether there's Reafon for't, or no ; 
 Be my employment here on earth 
 To give a lib'ral fcope to mirth, 
 Life's barren vale with flow'rs t' adorn, 
 And pluck a rofe from ev'ry thorn. 
 
 F 4 But
 
 7 2 , T H E GHOST. 
 
 But if, by Error led aftray, 
 I cliance to wander from my way, 
 Let no blind guide obferve, in fpite, 
 I'm wrong, who cannot fet me right. 
 That Do&or could I ne'er endure, 
 Who found difeafe, and not a cure, 
 Nor can I hold that man a friend, 
 Whofe zeal a helping hand (hall lend 
 To open happy Folly's eyes, 
 And, making wretched, make me wife ; 
 For next, a Truth which can't admit 
 Reproof from Wifdom or from Wit, 
 To being happy here below, 
 Is to believe that we are fo. 
 
 Some few in knowledge find relief, 
 I place my comfort in belief. 
 Some for Reality may call, 
 FANCY to me is All in All. 
 Imagination^ thro' the trick 
 Of Dodors, often makes, us fick, 
 And why, let any Sophift tell, 
 May it not likewife make us well ? 
 
 This
 
 T H E G H O S T. 73 
 
 This am I fure, whate'er our view, 
 Whatever fhadows we purfue, 
 For our purfuits, be what they will, 
 Are little more than fliadows ftijl, 
 Too fwift they fly, too fwift and ftrong, 
 For man to catch, or hold them long. 
 But Joys which in the FANCY live, 
 Each moment to each man may give. 
 True to hirafelf, and true to eafe, 
 He foftens Fate's fevere decrees, 
 And (can a Mortal wifti for more ?) 
 Creates, and makes himfelf new o'er, 
 Mocks boafled vain Reality, 
 And /r, whate'er he wants to Be. 
 
 Hail, FANCY to thy pow'r I owe 
 Deliv'rance from the gripe of Woe, 
 To Thee I owe a mighty debt, 
 Which Gratitude (hall ne'er forget, 
 Whilft Mem'ry can her force employ, 
 A large encreafe of ev'ry joy. 
 When at my doors, too ftrongly barr'd, 
 Authority had plac'd a guard,
 
 74 THE GHOS.T. 
 
 A knavijh guard, ordain'd by Law 
 
 To keep poor Honejry in awe ; 
 
 Authority, fevere and Hern, 
 
 To intercept my wifh'd return ; 
 
 When Foes grew proud, and Friends grew cool, 
 
 And Laughter feiz'd each fober fool ; 
 
 When Candour ftarted in amaze, 
 
 And, meaning cenfure, hinted praife ; 
 
 When Prudence, lifting up her eyes 
 
 And hands, thank'd Heav'n, that (he was wife ; 
 
 When All around Me, with an air 
 
 Of hopelefs Sorrow, look'd Defpair, 
 
 When They or faid, or feem'd to fay, 
 
 There is but one, one only way 
 
 Better, and be advis'd by us, 
 
 Not be at all, than to be thus j 
 
 When Virtue munn'd the (hock, and Pride 
 
 Difabled, lay by Virtue's fide, 
 
 Too weak my ruffled foul to chear, 
 
 Which could not hope, yet would not fear ; 
 
 Health in her motion, the wild grace 
 
 Of Pleafure fpeaking in her face, 
 
 Dull Regularity thrown by, 
 
 And Comfort beaming from her eye, 
 
 FANCY,
 
 THE GHOST. 75 
 
 FANCY, in richeft robes array'd, 
 Came fmiling forth, and brought me aid, 
 Came finiling o'er that dreadful time, 
 And, more to blefs me, came in Rime. 
 
 Nor is her Pow'r to Me confin'd, 
 It fpreads, It comprehends Mankind. 
 
 When (to the Spirit-ftirring found 
 Of Trumpets breathing Courage round, 
 And Fifes, well mingled to reftrain, 
 And bring that Courage down again, 
 Or to the melancholy knell 
 Of the dull, deep, and doleful bell, 
 Such as of late the good Saint Bride 
 Muffled, to mortify the pride 
 Of thofe, who, ENGLAND quite forgot. 
 Paid their vile homage to the SCOT, 
 Where ASGILL held the foremoft place, 
 Whilft my Lord figur'd at a race) 
 ProceJJions ('tis not worth debate 
 Whether They are of Stage or State) 
 Move on, fb very very flow, 
 'Tis doubtful if they move or no ; 
 
 When
 
 THE GHOST. 
 
 When the Performers all the while 
 
 Mechanically frown or fmile, 
 
 Or, with a dull and ftupid flare, 
 
 A vacancy of Senfe declare, 
 
 Or, with down-bending eye, feem wrought 
 
 Into a Labyrinth of Thought, 
 
 Where Reafon wanders ftill in doubt, 
 
 And, once got in, cannot get out ; 
 
 What caufe fufficient can we find 
 
 To fatisfy a thinking mind, 
 
 Why, dup'd by fuch vain farces, Man 
 
 Defcends to acl on fuch a plan ? 
 
 Why They, who hold themfelves divine, 
 
 Can in fuch wretched follies join, 
 
 Strutting like Peacocks, or like Crows, 
 
 Tfjemfe/ves and Nature to expofe ? 
 
 What Caufe, but that (you'll underftand 
 
 We have our Remedy at hand, 
 
 That if perchance we ftart a doubt, 
 
 Ere it is fix'd, we wipe it out, 
 
 As Surgeons, when they lop a limb, 
 
 Whether for Profit, Fame, or Whim, 
 
 Or mere experiment to try, 
 
 Muft always have a Styptic by) 
 
 FANCY
 
 THE GHOST. 77 
 
 FANCY fteps in, and ftamps that rea!, 
 Which, ipfofaffo^ is Ideal. 
 
 Can none remember, yes, I know, 
 All muft remember that rare (how, 
 When to the Country SENSE went down, 
 And Fools came flocking up to Town, 
 When Knights (a work which all admit 
 To be for Knighthood much unfit) 
 Built booths for hire ; when Parfons play'd, 
 In robes Canonical array'd, 
 And, Fiddling, join'd the Smithfield dance, 
 The price of Tickets to advance ; 
 Or, unto Tapfters turn'd, dealt out, 
 Running from Booth to Booth about, 
 To ev'ry Scoundrel, by retail, 
 True pennyworths of Beef and Ale, 
 Then firft prepar'd, by bringing beer in, 
 For prefent grand Electioneering ; 
 When Heralds^ running all about 
 To bring in Order, turn'd it Out ; 
 When, by the prudent Marjbal's care, 
 Left the rude populace (hould flare, 
 
 And
 
 7 8 THE GHOST. 
 
 And with unhallow'd eyes profane 
 Gay Puppets of Patrician ftrain, 
 The whole Proceflion, as in fpite, 
 Unheard, unfeen, dole off by Night ; 
 When our Lov'd Monarch, nothing loth, 
 Solemnly took that facred oath, 
 Whence mutual firm agreements fpring 
 Betwixt the Subjeft and the King, 
 By which, in ufual manner crown'd, 
 ' His Head, his Heart, his Hands he bound, 
 Againft himfelf, mould Paflion ftir 
 The leaft Propenfity to err, 
 Againft all Slaves, who might prepare 
 Or open force, or hidden fnare, 
 That glorious CHARTER to maintain, 
 By which We ferve, and He mujl reign ; 
 Then FANCY, with unbounded fway, 
 RevelPd fole Miftrefs of the day, 
 And wrought fuch wonders, as might make 
 Egyptian Sorcerers forfake 
 Their baffled mockeries, and own 
 The Palm of Magic Her's alone.
 
 THE GHOST. 79 
 
 A KNIGHT (who in the filk.cn hp 
 Of lazy Peace, had liv'd on Pap, 
 Who never yet had dar'd to roam 
 'Bove ten or twenty miles from home, 
 Nor even that, unlefs a Guide 
 Was plac'd to amble by his fide, 
 And troops of Slaves were fpread around 
 To keep his Honour fafe and found, 
 Who could not fuffer for his life 
 A Point to fword, or Edge to knife, 
 And always fainted at the fight 
 Of Blood, tho' 'twas not (lied in fight, 
 Who difinherited one Son 
 For firing off an Elder Gun, 
 And whipt another, fix years old, 
 Becaufe the Boy, prefumptuous, bold 
 To Madnefs, likely to become 
 A very Swifs, had beat a drum, 
 Tho' it appear'd an inftrument 
 Moll peaceable and innocent, 
 Having from firft been in the hands 
 And fervice of the City Bands) 
 Grac'd with thofe enfigns, which were meant 
 To further Honour's dread intent, 
 
 The
 
 go THEGHOST. 
 
 The Minds of Warriors to inflame, 
 
 And fpur them on 'to deeds of Fame, 
 
 With little Sword, large Spurs, high Feather, 
 
 Fearful of ev'ry thing but Weather, 
 
 (And all muft own, who pay regard 
 
 To Charity, it had been hard 
 
 That in his very firft Campaign 
 
 His Honours fhould be foil'd with rain) 
 
 A Hero all at once became, 
 
 And (feeing others much the fame 
 
 In point of Valour as himfelf, 
 
 Who leave their Courage on a flielf 
 
 From Year to Year, till fome fuch rout 
 
 In proper feafon calls it out) 
 
 Strutted, look'd big, and fwagger'd more 
 
 Than ever Hero did before, 
 
 Look'd up, Look'd down, Look'd all around, 
 
 Like MAVORS, grimly fmil'd and frown'd, 
 
 Seem'd Heav'n, and Earth, and Hell to call 
 
 To fight, that he might rout them all, 
 
 And perfonated Valour's ftile 
 
 So long, Spectators to beguile, 
 
 That pafllng ftrange, and wondrous true, 
 
 Himfelf at laft believ'd it too, 
 
 Nor
 
 THE GHOST. 81 
 
 Nor for a time could he difcern, 
 Till Truth and Darknefs toofc their turn, 
 So well did FANCY play her part, 
 That Coward (till was at the heart. 
 
 WHIFFLE (who knows not WHIFFLE'S name, 
 By the impartial voice of fame 
 Recorded firft, thro' all this land, 
 In Vanity's illuftrious band ? ) 
 Who, by all bounteous Nature meant 
 For offices of hardiment, 
 A modern HERCULES at leaft, 
 To rid the world of each wild beaft, 
 Of each wild beaft which came in view, 
 Whether on four legs or on two, 
 Degenerate, delights to prove 
 His force on the Parade of Love, 
 Difclaims the joys which camps afford, 
 And for the Diftaff quits the fvvord ; 
 Who fond of women would appear 
 To public eye, and public ear, 
 But, when in private, let's them know 
 How little they can truft to (how ; 
 
 VOL. II. G Who
 
 82 THE GHOST. 
 
 Who fports a Woman, as of courfe, 
 
 Juft as a Jockey (hews a horfe, 
 
 And then returns her to the ftable, 
 
 Or vainly plants her at his table, 
 
 Where he would rather VENUS find, 
 
 (So palPd, and fo deprav'd his mind) 
 
 Than, by fome great occafion led, 
 
 To feize Her panting in her bed, 
 
 Burning with more than mortal fires, 
 
 And melting in her own defires j 
 
 Who, ripe in years, is yet a child, 
 
 Thro' fafhion, not thro' feeling wild ; 
 
 Whate'er in others, who proceed 
 
 As Senfe and Nature have decreed, 
 
 From real paflion flows, in him 
 
 Is mere effect of mode and whim ; 
 
 Who Laughs, a very common way, 
 
 Becaufe he nothing has to fay, 
 
 As your choice SPIRITS oaths difpenfe 
 
 To fill up vacancies of Senfe j 
 
 Who, having fome fmall Senfe, defies* t, 
 
 Or, ufing, always mifapplies it ; 
 
 Who now and then brings fomething forth, 
 
 Which feems indeed of Sterling Worth, 
 
 Something,
 
 THE GHOST. 
 
 Something, by fudcen Start and Fit, 
 Which at a diftance looks like wit, 
 But, on Examination near, 
 To his confufion will appear 
 By Truth's fair glafs, to be at beft 
 A Threadbare Jefter's threadbare jeft ; 
 Who frifks and dances thro' the ftreet, 
 Sings without voice, rides without feat, 
 Plays o'er his tricks, like ^SOP'S Afs, 
 A gratis fool to all who pafs ; 
 Who riots, tho' he loves not wafte, 
 Whores without luft, drinks without tafte, 
 Acts without fenfe, talks without thought, 
 Does everything but what he ought; 
 Who, led by forms, without the pow'r 
 Of Vice, is .Vicious; who one hour, 
 Proud without Pride, the next will be 
 Humble without Humility ; 
 Whofe Vanity we all difcern, 
 The Spring on which his actions turn ; 
 Whofe aim in erring, is to err, 
 So that he may be fingular, 
 And all his utmoft wifhes mean, 
 Is, tho' he's laugh'd at, to be feen ? 
 G 2
 
 $4 T H E G H O S T. 
 
 Such (for when FLATT'RY'S foothing ftrain 
 Had robb'd the Mufe of her difdain, 
 And found a method to perfuade 
 Her art, to foften ev'ry (hade, 
 JUSTICE enrag'd, the pencil fnateh'd 
 v From her degen'rate hand, and fcratch'd 
 Out ev'ry trace ; then, quick as thought, 
 From life this ftrikihg likenefs caught) 
 In Mind, in Manners, and in Mien, 
 Such WHIFFLE came, and fuch was feen 
 In the World's eye, but (ftrange to tell!) 
 Mifled by FANCY'S magic fpell, 
 Deceiv'd, not dreaming of deceit, 
 Cheated, but happy in the cheat, 
 Was more than human in his own. 
 O bow, bow All at FANCY'S throne, 
 
 Whofe Pow'r could make fo vile an Elf, 
 
 
 With Patience bear that thing, himfelf. 
 
 But, Miftrefs of each art to pleafe, 
 Creative FANCY, what are thefe, 
 Thefe Pageants of a trifler's Pen, 
 To what thy Pow'r effected then ? 
 
 Familiar
 
 THE GHOST. 85 
 
 Familiar with the human mind, 
 As fwift and fubtle as the wind, 
 Which we all feel, yet no one knows 
 Or whence it comes, or where it goes, 
 FANCY at once in ev'ry part 
 Poffefs'd the Eye, the Head, the Heart, 
 And in a thoufand forms array'd, 
 A thoufand various gambols play'd. 
 
 Here, in a Face which well might afk 
 The Privilege to wear a mafk 
 In fpite of Law, and Juftice teach 
 For public good t' excufe the breach, 
 Within the furrow of a wrinkle 
 'Twixt Eyes, which could not fhine but twinkle, 
 Like Centinels i' th' ftarry way, 
 Who wait for 1 the return of day, 
 Almoft burnt out, and feem to keep 
 Their watch, like Soldiers, in their fleep, 
 Or like thofe lamps which, by the pow'r 
 Of Law, muft burn from hour to hour, 
 (Elfe they, without redemption, fall 
 Under the terrors of that Hall, 
 
 G 3 Which,
 
 T H E G H O S T. 
 
 Which, once notorious for a hop y 
 Is now become a JuJlice-Jhop) 
 Which are fo manag'd, to go out 
 Juft when the time comes round about, 
 Which yet thro' emulation ftrive 
 To keep their dying light alive, 
 And (not uncommon, as we find, 
 Amongft the children of mankind) 
 As they grow weaker, would feem ftronger, 
 And burn a little, little longer ; 
 FANCY, betwixt fuch eyes enfhrin'd, 
 No brufti to daub, no mill to grind, 
 Thrice wav'd her wand around, whofe force 
 Chang'd in an inftant Nature's courfe, 
 .And, hardly credible in Rime, 
 Not only ftopp'd, but call'd back Time. 
 The Face of ev'ry wrinkle clear'd, 
 Smooth as the floating ftream appear'd, 
 Down the Neck ringlets fpread their flame, 
 The Neck admiring whence they came j 
 On the Arch'd Brow the Graces play'd ; 
 On the full Bofom Cupid laid ; 
 Suns, from their proper orbits fent, 
 Became for Eyes a fupplement ; 
 
 Teeth,
 
 THE GHOST. $7 
 
 Teeth, white as ever Teeth were feen, 
 Deliver'd from the hand of GREEN, 
 Started, in regular array, 
 Like Train-Bands on a grand Field-day, 
 Into the Gums, which would have fled, 
 But, wond'ring, turn'd from white to red, 
 Quite alter'd was the whole machine, 
 And Lady was fifteen. 
 
 Here She made lordly temples rife 
 Before the pious DASHWOOD'S eyes, 
 Temples which built aloft in air, 
 May ferve for (how, if not for pray'r , 
 In folemn form Herfelf, before, 
 Array'd like Faith, the Bible bore. 
 Therf^ over MELCOMB'S feather'd head, 
 Who, quite a man of Gingerbread, 
 Savour'd in talk, in drefs, and phyz, 
 More of another World than this, 
 To a dwarf Mufe a Giant Page, 
 The laft grave Fop of the laft Age, 
 In a fuperb and feather'd hearfe, 
 Befcutcbeon'd and betaggd with Verfe, 
 
 G 4 Which,
 
 88 THE GHOST. 
 
 Which, to Beholders from afar, 
 Appear'd like a triumphal Car, 
 She rode, in a caft Rainbow clad ; 
 There ^ throwing off the hallow' d plaid, 
 Naked, as when (in thofe drear Cells 
 - Where, Self-bleffd, Self-curs' d MADNESS dwells) 
 PLEASURE, on whom, in Laughter's fhape, 
 FRENZY had perfected a rape, 
 Firft brought her forth, before her time, 
 Wild Witnefs of her fhame and crime, 
 Driving before an Idol band 
 Of driv'ling STUARTS, hand in hand, 
 Some, who to curfe Mankind, had Wore 
 A Crown they ne'er -muft think of more, 
 Others, whofe baby brows were grac'd 
 With Paper Crowns, and Toys of Pafte, 
 She Jigg'd, and playing on the Flute 
 Spread raptures o'er the foul of BUTE. 
 
 Big with vaft hopes, fome mighty plan, 
 Which wrought the bufy foul of man 
 To her full bent, the CIVIL LAW, 
 Fk Code to keep a world in awe, 
 
 Bound
 
 THE GHOST. 89 
 
 Bound o'er his brows, fair to behold, 
 
 As Jewijh Frontlets were of old, 
 
 The famous CHAPTER of our land, 
 
 Defac'd, and mangled in his hand ; 
 
 As one whom deepeft thoughts employ, 
 
 But deepeft thoughts of trueft joy, 
 
 Serious and flow he flrode, he ftalk'd, 
 
 Before him troops of Heroes walk'd, 
 
 Whom beft He lov'd, of Heroes crown'd, 
 
 By TORIES guarded all around, 
 
 Dull folemn pleafure in his face, 
 
 He faw the honours of his race, 
 
 He faw their lineal glories rife, 
 
 And touch'd, or feem'd to touch the fldes. 
 
 Not the moft diftant mark of fear, 
 
 No fign of axe, or fcaffold near, 
 
 Not one curs'd thought, to crofs his will, 
 
 Of fuch a place as Tower Hill. 
 
 Curfe on this Mufe^ a flippant Jade, 
 A^ Shrew, like ev'ry other Maid 
 Who turns the corner of nineteen, 
 Devour'd with peevifhnefs and fplccn. 
 
 Her
 
 9 o T H E G H O S T. 
 
 Her Tongue (for as, when bound for life, 
 
 The Huiband furors for the Wife, 
 
 So if in any works of rime 
 
 Perchance there blunders out a crime, 
 
 Poor Culprit Bards muft always rue it, 
 
 Altho' 'tis plain the Mufes do it) 
 
 Sooner or later cannot fail 
 
 To fend me headlong to a jail. 
 
 Whate'er my theme (our themes we chufe 
 
 In modern days without a Mufe 9 
 
 Juft as a Father will provide 
 
 To join a Bridegroom and a Bride, 
 
 As if, tho' they muft be the Phy'rs, 
 
 The game was wholly bis, not theirs) 
 
 Whate'er my theme, the Mufe, who ftil! 
 
 Owns no direfuon but her will, 
 
 Flies off, and, ere I could expel, 
 
 By ways oblique and indirect, 
 
 At once quite over head and e.^rs, 
 
 In fatal Politics appears. 
 
 Time was, and, if I ought difcern 
 
 Of fate, that Time fhall loon return, 
 
 When deceit and demure at lead, 
 
 As grave and dull as any Prieft, 
 
 I could
 
 T H E G H O S T. 9 i 
 
 I could fee Vice in robes array 'd, 
 Could fee the game of Folly play'd 
 Succefsfully in Fortune's fchool, 
 Without exclaiming rogue or fool ; 
 Time was, when nothing loth or proud, 
 I lacquied, with the fawning crowd, 
 Scoundrels in Office, and would bow 
 To Cyphers great in place -, but now 
 Upright I ftand, as if wife Fate, 
 To compliment a flvatter'd ftate, 
 Had me, like ATLAS, hither fent 
 To moulder up the firmament, 
 And if I ftoop'd, with gen'ral crack 
 The Heavens would tumble from my back ; 
 Time was, when rank and fituation 
 Secur'd the great Ones of the Nation 
 From all controul ; Satire and- Law 
 Kept only little Knaves in awe, 
 But now, Decorum loft, I (land 
 Bcmus"d^ a Pencil in my hand, 
 And, dead to ev'ry fenfe of fhamc, 
 Carelefs of Safety and of Fame, 
 The names of Scoundrels minute down, 
 And Libel more than half the Town. 
 
 How
 
 THE GHOST. 
 
 Kow can a Statefman be fecure 
 In all his Villainies, if poor 
 And dirty Authors thus (hall dare 
 To lay his rotten bofom bare ? 
 Mufes mould pafs away their time, 
 In drefling out the Poet's rime 
 With Bills and Ribbands, and array 
 Each Hue in harmlefs tafte, tho' gay. 
 When the hot burning Fit is on, 
 They mould regale their reftlefs Son 
 With fomething to allay his rage, 
 Some cool Caftalian Beverage, 
 Or fome fuch draught (tho' They, 'tis plain, 
 Taking the Mufes name in vain, 
 Know nothing of their real court, 
 And only fable from report) 
 As makes a WHITEHEAD'S Ode go down, 
 Or flakes the Feverette of Brown : 
 Eut who would in his Senfes think 
 Of Mufes giving gall to drink, 
 Or .that their folly mould afford 
 To raving Poets Gun or Sword ? 
 Poets were ne'er defign'd by fate 
 To meddle with affairs of State, 
 
 Nor
 
 T H E G H O S T. 95 
 
 Nor mould (if we may fpeak our thought 
 
 Truely as men of Honour ought) 
 
 Sound Policy their rage admit, 
 
 To Launch the thunderbolts of Wit 
 
 About thofe heads, which, when they're mot, 
 
 Can't tell if 'twas by Wit, or not. 
 
 Thefe things well known, what Devil in fpite 
 Can have feduc'd me thus to write 
 Out of that road, which muft have led 
 To riches, -without heart or head, 
 Into that road, which, had I more 
 Than ever Poet had before, 
 Of Wit and Virtue, in difgrace 
 Would keep me dill, and out of place, 
 Which, if fome Judge (You'll underftand 
 One famous, famous thro' the land 
 For making Law) mould ftand my friend, 
 At laft may in a PilFry end, 
 And all this, I my felf admit, 
 Without one caufe to lead to it.- 
 
 For inftance now this book the GHOST 
 Methinks I hear fome Critic Poft 
 
 Remark
 
 . T H E G H O S T. 
 
 Remark mod gravely " The firft word 
 . Which we about the Ghoft have heard/" 
 Peace, my good Sir not quite fo faft ~ 
 What is the firft, may be the lad, 
 Which is a point, all muft agree, 
 Cannot depend on You or Me. 
 FANNY, no Ghoft of common mould, 
 Is not by forms to be controul'd, 
 To keep her ftate, and fhew her (kill, 
 She never comes but when (lie will. 
 I wrote and wrote (perhaps you doubt, 
 And mrewdly, what I wrote about, 
 Believe me, much to my difgrace, 
 I too am in the felf-fame cafe) 
 But ftill I wrote, till FANNY came 
 Impatient, nor could any mame 
 On me with equal juftice fall, 
 If She had never come at all. 
 An Underling, I could not ftir 
 Without jhe Cue thrown out by her, 
 Nor from the fubjecl aid receive 
 Until She came, and gave me leave. 
 So that (Ye Sons of Erudition 
 Mark, this is but a fuppofition, 
 
 Nor
 
 T H E G H O S T. 95 
 
 Nor would I to fo wife a nation 
 
 Suggeft it as a Revelation] 
 
 If henceforth dully turning o'er 
 
 Page after Page, Ye read no more 
 
 Of FANNY, who, in Sea or Air, 
 
 May be departed God knows where, 
 
 Rail at jilt Fortune, but agree 
 
 No cenfure can be hid on me, 
 
 For fure (the caufe let MANSFIELD try) 
 
 FANNY is in the fault, not I. 
 
 But to return and this I hold, 
 A fecret worth its weight in gold 
 To thofe who write, as I write now, 
 Not to mind where they go, or how, 
 Thro' ditch, thro' bog, o'er hedge and ftile. 
 Make it but worth the Reader's while, 
 And keep a paiTage fair and plain 
 Always to bring him back again. 
 Thro' dirt, who fcruples to approach, 
 At pleafure's call to take a coach, 
 But we mould think the man a clown 
 Who in the dirt mould fet us down ? 
 
 B-M
 
 9 6 THE GHOST. 
 
 But to return if WIT, who ne'er 
 The fhackles of reftraint could bear, 
 In wayward humour fhould refufe 
 Her timely fuccour to the Mufe, 
 And to no rules and orders tied, 
 Roughly deny to be her guide, 
 She muft renounce Decorum's plan, 
 And" get back when, and how fhe can, 
 As Parfons^ who, without pretext, 
 As foon as mention'd, quit >heir text, 
 And, to promote Sleep's genial pow'r, 
 Grope in the dark for half an Hour, 
 Give no more Reafon (for we know 
 Reafoh is vulgar, mean, and low) 
 Why they come back (mould it befal 
 That ever they come back at all) 
 Into the road^ to end the rout, 
 Than they can give Why they went out. 
 
 But to return this Book the GHOST- 
 A mere amufement at the moft, 
 A trifle, fit to wear away 
 The horrors of a rainy day, 
 
 A flight
 
 THE 'GHOST. 97 
 
 A flight (hot filk, for fummer wear, 
 Juft as our modern State men are, 
 If rigid honefty permit 
 That I for once purloin the Wit 
 Of him, who, were we all to (leal, 
 Is much too rich the theft to feel. 
 Yet in this Book, where Eafe mould join 
 With Mirth tofugar ev'ry line, 
 Where it mould all be mere Chit Chat, 
 Lively, Good humour'd, and all that, 
 Where komjl SATIRE, in difgrace, 
 Should not fo much as mew her face, 
 The Shrew, o'erleaping all due bounds, 
 Breaks into Laughter's facred grounds, 
 And, in contempt, plays o'er her tricks 
 In Science, Trade, and Politics. 
 
 But why mould the diftemper'd Scold 
 Attempt to blacken Men enroll'd 
 In PowYs dread book, whofe mighty fkill 
 Can twirl an Empire to their will, 
 Whofe Voice is Fate, and on their tongue 
 Law, Liberty, and Life are hung, 
 
 VOL, II. H Whom
 
 9 8 THE GHOST. 
 
 Whom on enquiry, Truth fhall find, 
 
 With STUARTS Knk'd, time out of mind 
 
 Superior to their Country's Laws, 
 
 Defenders of a Tyrant's caufe, 
 
 Men, who the fame damn'd maxims hold 
 
 Darkly, which they avow'd of old, 
 
 Who, tho' by diff'rent means, purfue 
 
 The end which they had firfl in view, 
 
 And, force found vain, now play their part 
 
 With much Ids Honour, much more Art? 
 
 Why, at the Corners of the Streets, 
 
 To ev'ry Patriot drudge She meets, 
 
 Known or unknown, with furious cry 
 
 Should She wild clamours vent, or why, 
 
 The minds of Groundlings to inflame, 
 
 A DASHWOOD, BUTE, and WYNDHAM name? 
 
 Why, having not to our furprize 
 
 The fear of death before her Eyes, 
 
 Bearing, and that but now and then, 
 
 No other weapon but her pen, 
 
 Should She an argument afford, 
 
 For blood, to Men who wear a fiver d, 
 
 Men, who can nicely trim and pare 
 
 A point of HONOUR to a hair, 
 
 (HON'OVR
 
 THE GHOST. 99 
 
 (HONOUR a Word of nice import, 
 A pretty trinket in a Court, 
 Which my Lord quite in rapture feels 
 Dangling, and rattling with his Seals 
 HONOUR a Word, which all the Nine 
 Would be much puzzled to define 
 HONOUR a Word which torture mocks 
 And might confound a thoufand LOCKES 
 Which (for I leave to wifer heads, 
 Who fields of death prefer to beds 
 Of down, to find out, if they can 
 What HONOUR , on their Wild plan) 
 Is not) to take it in their Way, 
 And this we fure may dare to fay 
 Without incurring an offence, 
 Courage, Law, Honejty, or Senfe) 
 Men, who all Spirit, Life and Sou!, 
 Neat Butchers of a Button-hole, 
 Having more (kill, believe it true 
 That they muft have more courage too, 
 Men, who without a place or name, 
 Their Fortunes fpeechlefs as their fame, 
 Would by the Sword new Fortunes- carve, 
 And rather die in fight than ftarve ? 
 
 .H 2 A
 
 100 
 
 THE GHOST. 
 
 At Coronations, a vaft field 
 
 Which food of ev'ry kind might yield, 
 
 Of good found food, at once moft fit 
 
 For purpofes of health and wit, 
 
 Could not ambitious SATIRE reft, 
 
 Content with what (he might digeft ? 
 
 Could me not feaft on things of courfe, 
 
 A Champion^ or a Champion's horfe ? 
 
 A Champion's horfe no, better fay, 
 
 Tho' better figur'd on that day 
 
 A borfe, which might appear to us, 
 
 Who deal in rime, a PEGASUS, 
 
 A Rider y who, when once got on, 
 
 Might pafs for a BELLEROPHON, 
 
 Dropt on a fudden from the fkies, 
 
 To catch and fix our wond'ring eyes, 
 
 To witch, with wand inftead of whip, 
 
 The world with noble horfemanmip, 
 
 To twift and twine, both Horfe and Man, 
 
 On fuch a well-concerted plan, 
 
 That, Centaur-like, when all was done, 
 
 We fcarce could think they were not one ? 
 
 Could She not to our itching ears 
 
 Bring the new names of new-coined Peers, 
 
 Who
 
 THE GHOST. 
 
 Who Walk'd, Nobility forgot, 
 With moulders fitter for a knot, 
 Than robes of Honour, for whofe fake 
 Heralds in form were forc'd to make, 
 To make, becaufe they could not find, 
 Great Predeceflbrs to their mind ? 
 Could She not (tho' 'tis doubtful fmce 
 Whether He Plumber is, or Prince) 
 Tell of a fimple Knight's advance 
 To be a doughty Peer of France r , 
 Tell how he did a Dukedom gain, 
 And ROBINSON was AqyiTAiN, 
 Tell how her City-Chiefs difgrac'd, 
 Were at an empty table plac'd, 
 A grofs neglecl, which, whilft they live, 
 They can't forget, and won't forgive, 
 A grofs negle of all thofe rights 
 Which march with City Appetites, 
 Of all thofe Canons, which we find 
 By Gluttony, time out of mind, 
 Eftablim'd j which they ever hold, 
 Dearer than any thing but Gold ? 
 
 H 3 Thanks
 
 102 
 
 THE GHOST. 
 
 Thanks to my Stars I now fee more 
 Of Courtiers, and of Courts no more 
 Thus {tumbling on my City Friends, 
 Blind Chance my guide, my purpofe bends 
 In line direft, and mall purfue 
 The point which I had firft in view, 
 Nor more (hall with the reader fport 
 Till I have feen him fafe in port. 
 Hufh'd be each fear rno more I bear 
 Thro' the wide regions of the air 
 The Reader terrified, no more 
 Wild Ocean's horrid paths explore. 
 Be the plain track from henceforth mine 
 
 Cr of s -roads to ALLEN I refign, 
 
 ALLEN, the honour of this nation, 
 
 ALLEN, himfelf a Corporation^ 
 
 ALLEN, of late notorious grown 
 
 For writings none, or all his own, 
 
 ALLEN, the firft of letter* d men, 
 
 Since the good Bimop holds his pen, 
 
 And at his elbow takes his (land 
 
 To mend his head, and guide his hand. 
 
 But hold once more DlgreJJlon hence 
 
 Let us return to Common &/, 
 
 The
 
 T H E G H O S T. 163 
 
 The Car of PHOEBUS I difcharge; 
 
 My Carriage now a LORD-MAYOR'S Barge. 
 
 Suppofe we now we may fuppofe 
 In Verfe, what would be Sin in Profe 
 The Sky with darknefs overfpread, 
 And ev'ry Star retir'd to bed, 
 The gew-gaw robes of Pomp and Pride 
 In fome dark corner thrown afide, 
 Great Lords and Ladies giving way 
 To what they feem to fcorn by day, 
 The real feelings of the heart, 
 And Nature taking place of Art, 
 Defire triumphant thro' the Night, 
 And Beauty panting with delight, 
 Cha/?ity y Woman's faireft crown, 
 Till the return of Morn laid down, 
 Then to be worn again as bright 
 As if not fullied in the Night, 
 Dull Ceremony, bufinefs o'er, 
 Dreaming in form at COTTRELL'S door, 
 Precaution trudging all about 
 To fee the Candles fafely out, 
 
 H 4 Bearing
 
 104 T H E G H O S T. 
 
 Bearing a mighty Majler Key, 
 Habited like Qtconomy, 
 Stamping each lock with triple feals, 
 Mean AV'RICE creeping at her heels. 
 
 Suppofe we too, like (heep in Pen, 
 The Mayor and Court of Aldermen 
 Within their barge, which thro' the deep, 
 The Rowers more than half afleep, 
 Mov'd flow, as over-charg'd with State ; 
 THAMES groan'd beneath the mighty weight, 
 And felt that bawble heavier far 
 Than a whole fleet of men of war. 
 SLEEP o'er each well-known faithful head 
 With lib'ral hand his Poppies (bed, 
 Each head, by DULLNESS rend'red fit 
 SLEEP and his Empire to admit. 
 Thro' the whole paflage not a word, 
 Not one faint, weak, half found was heard ; 
 SLEEP had prevail'd to overwhelm 
 The Steerfman nodding o'er the helm j 
 The Rowers, without force or fkill, 
 Left the dull Barge to drive at will ; 
 
 The
 
 THE. GHOST. 105 
 
 The fluggifli Oars fufpended hung, 
 And even BEARDMORE held his tongue. 
 COMMERCE, regardful of a freight, 
 On which depended half her State, 
 Stepp'd to the helm, with ready hand 
 She fafely clear'd that bank of Sand, 
 Where, ftranded, our Weft-Country Fleet 
 Delay and Danger often meet ; 
 Till NEPTUNE, anxious for the trade, 
 Comes in full tides, and brings them aid j 
 Next (for the Mufes can furvey 
 Objects by Night as well as day, 
 Nothing prevents their taking aim, 
 Darknefs and Light to them the fame) 
 They paft that building, which of old 
 Queen-mothers was defign'd to hold, 
 At prefent a mere lodging-pen* 
 A Palace turn'd into a den, 
 To Barracks turn'd, and Soldiers tread 
 Where Dowagers have laid their head ; 
 Why mould we mention Surrey-Street, 
 Where ev'ry week grave Judges meet, 
 All fitted out with hum and ha, 
 In proper form to drawl out Law, 
 
 - To
 
 IC 6 T H E G H O S T. 
 
 To fee all caufes duly tried 
 
 'Twixt Knaves who drive, and Fools who ride ? 
 
 Why at the Temple fliould we ftay ? 
 
 What of the Temple dare we fay ? 
 
 A dang'rous ground we tread on there, 
 
 And words perhaps may actions bear, 
 
 Where, as the Breth'ren of the feas 
 
 or fares, the Lawyers ply for fees. 
 
 What of that Bridge, moft wifely made 
 
 To ferve the purpofes of trade, 
 
 In the great Mart of all this Nation, 
 
 By flopping up the Navigation, 
 
 And to that Sand-bank adding weight, 
 
 Which is already much too great ? 
 
 What of that Bridge, which, void of Senfe, 
 
 But well fupplied with impudence, 
 
 EngTiJhmen, knowing not the Guild, 
 
 Thought they might have a claim to build, 
 
 Till PATERSON, as white as milk, 
 
 As fmooth as oil, as foft as filk, 
 
 In folemn manner had decreed, 
 
 That, on the other fide the TWEED, 
 
 ART, born and bred, and fully grown, 
 
 Was with one MYLNE, a man unknown, 
 
 But
 
 T H E G H O S T. 107 
 
 But grace, preferment, and renown 
 Deferving, juft arriv'd in town ; 
 One MYLNE, an Artift perfect quite, 
 Both in his own, and country's right, 
 As fit to make a bridge, as He, 
 With glorious Patavitiiy, 
 To build infcriptions, worthy found 
 To lie for ever under ground. 
 
 Much more, worth obfervation too, 
 Was this a feafon to purfue 
 The theme, Our Mufe might tell in rime ; 
 The Will She hath, but not the time; 
 For, fwift as fhaft from Indian bow, 
 (And when a Goddefs comes, we know, 
 Surpaffing Nature ads prevail, 
 And boats want neither oar, nor fail) 
 The VefTel part, and reach'd the fhore 
 So quick, that Thought was fcarce before. 
 
 Suppofe we now our City-Court 
 Safely deliver'd at the port, 
 And, of their State regardlefs quite, 
 Landed, like fmuggled goods, by night j 
 
 The
 
 io8 T H E G H O S T. 
 
 The folemn Magiftrate laid down, 
 The dignity of robe and gown 
 With ev'ry other enfign gone ; 
 Suppofe the woollen Night- Cap on : 
 The Flejh-brujb us'd with decent ftate 
 To make the Spirits circulate, 
 (A form, which to the Senfes true, 
 The liq'rifh Chaplain ufes too, 
 Tho', fomething to improve the plan, 
 He takes the Maid inftead of Man) 
 Swath'd, and with flannel cover'd o'er 
 To (hew the vigour of th/eefcore, 
 The vigour cf threefcore and ten 
 Above the proof of younger men, 
 Suppofe, the mighty DULLMAN led 
 Betwixt two flaves, and put to bed ; 
 Suppofe, the moment he lies down, 
 No miracle in this great town, 
 The Drone as faft afleep, as He 
 Muft in the courfe of Nature be, 
 Who, truth for our foundation take, 
 When up, is never half awake. 
 
 There
 
 T H E G H O S T. 109 
 
 There let him fleep, whilft we furvey 
 The preparations for the day, 
 That day, on which was to be (hewn 
 Court-Pride by City Pride outdone. 
 
 The jealous Mother fends away, 
 As only fit for childifh play, 
 That Daughter, who, to gall her pride, 
 Shoots up too forward by her fide. 
 
 The Wretch, of God and man accurs'd, 
 Of all Hell's inftruments the word, 
 Draws forth his pawns, and for the day 
 Struts in fome Spendthrift's vain array ; 
 Around his aukward doxy mine 
 The treafures of GOLCONDA'S mine, 
 Each Neighbour, with a jealous glare, 
 Beholds her folly publiuYd there. 
 
 Garments^ well fav'd (an anecdote 
 Which we can prove, or would not quote) 
 Garments well-fav'd, which firft were made, 
 When Taylors, to promote their Trade, 
 
 Agamft
 
 no T H E G H O S T. 
 
 Againft the Pitls in arms arofe, 
 
 And drove them out, or made them cloaths ; 
 
 Garments^ immortal, without end, 
 
 Like Names, and. Titles, which defcend 
 
 Succeffively from Sire to Son ; 
 
 Garment^ unlefs fome work is done 
 
 Of Note, not fuffer'd to appear 
 
 'Bove once at moft in ev'ry year, 
 
 Were now, in folemn form, laid bare 
 
 To take the benefit of air, 
 
 And, ere they came to be employ 'd 
 
 On this Solemnity, to void 
 
 That fcent, which RUSSIA'S leather gave, 
 
 From vile and impious Moth to fave. 
 
 Each head was bufy, and each heart 
 In preparation bore a part. 
 Running together all about 
 The Servants put each other out. 
 Till the grave Matter had decreed, 
 The more kafte, ever the worfe fpeed ; 
 Mifs, with her little eyes half-clos'd, 
 Over a fmuggled toilet dos'd j 
 
 The
 
 T H E G H O S T. ui 
 
 The Waiting- Maid, whom Story notes 
 A very Scrub in petticoats, 
 Hir'd for one Work, but doing all, 
 In flumbers lean'd againft the wall j 
 Milliners, fummon'd from afar, 
 Arriv'd in moals at Tempk-barj 
 Stri&Iy commanded to import 
 Cart-loads of foppery from Court j 
 With labour'd vifible defign 
 ART ftrove to \iefuperbly fine, 
 NATURE, more pleafmg, tho' more wild, 
 Taught otherwife her darling child, 
 And cried, with fpirited difdain, 
 Be H elegant and plain. 
 
 Lo ! from the chambers of the Eaft, 
 A welcome prelude to the feaft, 
 In Jaffron-colour 'd robe array'd, 
 High in a Car by VULCAN made, 
 Who work'd for JOVE hirnfelf, each Steed 
 High mettled, of celeftial breed, 
 Pawing and Pacing all the way, 
 AURORA brought the wiuYd-for clay, 
 
 And
 
 112 
 
 THE GHOST. 
 
 And held her empire, till out-run 
 By that brave jolly groom the SUN. 
 
 The Trumpet hark ! It fpeaks It fwells 
 The loud full harmony, It tells 
 The time at hand, when DULLMAN, led 
 By form, his Citizens muft head, 
 And march thofe troops, which at his call 
 Were now aflembled, to Guild-Hall, 
 On matters of importance great 
 To Court and City, Church and State. 
 
 From end to end the found makes way, 
 All hear the Signal and obey, 
 But DULLMAN, who, his charge forgot, 
 By MORPHEUS fetter'd, heard it not; 
 Nor could, fo found he flept and faft, 
 Hear any Trumpet, but the lad. 
 
 CRAPE, ever true and trufty known, 
 Stole from the Maid's bed to his own, 
 Then in the Spirituals of pride, 
 Planted himfelf at DULLMAN'S fide. 
 
 TLnce
 
 THE GHOST. 113 
 
 Thrice did the ever-faithful Slave, 
 
 With voice which rhight have reach'd the grave, 
 
 And broke death's adamantine chain, 
 
 On DULLMAN call, but call'd in vain j 
 
 Thrice with an arm, which might have made 
 
 The THF.BAN Boxer curfe his trade, 
 
 The drone he (hook, who rear'd the head, 
 
 And thrice fell backward on his bed. 
 
 What could be done ? where force hath fail'd, 
 
 Policy often hath prevail'd, 
 
 And what, an inference moft plain, 
 
 Had been, CRAPE thought might be again* 
 
 Under his pillow (ftill in mind 
 The Proverb kept, faft bind, fajl find) 
 Each blefled night the keys were laid, 
 Which CRAPE to draw away aflay'd. 
 What not the pow'r of voice or arm 
 Could do, this did, and broke the charm ; 
 Quick ftarted He with irupid ftare, 
 . For all his little Soul was there. 
 
 Behold him, taken up, rubb'd down, 
 In Elbow-Chair, and Morning-Gown j 
 VOL. II. I Behold
 
 T H E G H O S T. 
 
 Behold him, in his latter bloom, 
 
 Stripp'd, wafti'd, and fprinkled with perfume ; 
 
 Behold him bending with the weight 
 
 Of Robes, and trumpery of State ; 
 
 Behold him (for the Maxim's true, 
 
 Whate'er we by another do, 
 
 We do ourfelves, and Chaplain paid, 
 
 Like flaves, in ev'ry other trade, 
 
 Had mutter'd over God knows what, 
 
 Something which he by heart had got) 
 
 Having, as ufual, faid his pray'rs, 
 
 Go titter, totter, to the flairs ; 
 
 Behold him for defcent prepare, 
 
 With one foot trembling in the air ; 
 
 Hejtarts, he paufes on the brink, 
 
 And, hard to credit, feems to think ; 
 
 Thro' his whole train (the Chaplain gave 
 
 The proper cue to ev'ry flave) 
 
 At once, as with infection caught, 
 
 Eachyforta/, paused, and almd at thought ; 
 
 He turns, and they turn ; big with care, 
 
 He waddles to his Elbow-Chair, 
 
 Squats down, and, filent for a feafon, 
 
 At laft with CRAPE begins to reafon j 
 
 But
 
 THE GHOST. 1*5 
 
 But firft of all he made a fign 
 That ev'ry foul, but the Divine, 
 Should quit the room ; in him, he knows, 
 He may all confidence repofe. 
 
 CRAPE tho' I'm yet not quite awake- 
 Before this awful ftep I take, 
 On which my future all depends, 
 I ought to know my foes and friends. 
 By foes and friends, obferve me m'll, 
 I mean not thofe who well, or ill 
 Perhaps may wi/h me, but thofe who 
 Have't in their power to do it too. 
 Now if, attentive to the State, 
 In too much hurry to be great, 
 Or thro' much zeal, a motive, CRAPE, 
 Deferving praife, into a fcrape 
 I, like a Fool, am got, no doubt, 
 I, like a Wife Man, (hould get out. 
 Not that, remark without replies, 
 I fay that to get out is wife, 
 Or, by the very felf-fame rule 
 
 That to get in was like a Fool j 
 
 '/ 
 
 I 2 Th
 
 ii6 T H E G H O S T. 
 
 The marrow of this argument 
 Muft wholly reft on the event, 
 And therefore, which is really hard, 
 Againft events too I muft guard. 
 
 Should things continue as \\\eyj}and y 
 And BUTE prevail thro' all the land 
 Without a rival, by his aid, 
 My fortunes in a trice are made ; 
 Nay, Honours on my zeal may fmile, 
 And ftamp me Earl of fome great Me j 
 But, if a matter of much doubt, 
 The prefent Minifter goes out, 
 Fain would I know on what pretext 
 I can ftand fairly with the next ? 
 For as my aim at ev'ry hour 
 Is to be well with thofe in pow'r, 
 And my material point of view, 
 Whoever's in, to be in too, 
 I fliould not, like a blockhead, chufe 
 To gain tbefe fo as tbyfe to lofe ; 
 'Tis good in ev'ry cafe, You know, 
 To have two ftrings unto our bow. 
 
 As
 
 T H E G H O S T. 117 
 
 As one in wonder loft, CRAPE view'd 
 His Lord, who thus his fpeech purfued. 
 
 This, my good CRAPE, is my grand point, 
 And, as the times are out of joint, 
 The greater caution is requir'd 
 To bring about the point defir'd. 
 What I would wifh to bring about 
 Cannot admit a moment's doubt ; 
 The matter in difpute, You know, 
 Is what we call the quomodo. 
 That be thy tafk The Rev'rend Slave, 
 Becoming in a moment grave, 
 Fixt to the ground and rooted flood, 
 Juft like a man cut out of wood, 
 Such as we fee (without the leaft 
 Reflection glancing on the Prieft) 
 One or more, planted up and down, 
 Almoft in ev'ry Church in town ; 
 He flood fome minutes, then, like one 
 Who wifh'd the matter might be done, 
 But could not do it, ihook his head, 
 And thus the man of Sorrow faid : 
 
 I 3 Hard
 
 xx8 T H E G H O S T. 
 
 Hard is this talk, too hard I fwear, 
 By much too hard for me to bear, 
 Beyond expreflion hard my part, 
 Could mighty DULLMAN fee my heart, 
 When He, alas ! makes known a will, 
 Which CRAPE'S not able to fulfil. 
 Was ever my obedience barr'd 
 By any trifling nice regard 
 To Senfe and Honour ? could I reach 
 Thy meaning without help of fpeech, 
 At the firft motion of thy eye 
 Did not thy faithful creature fly ? 
 Have I not faid, not what I ought, 
 But what by earthly Mafter taught ? 
 Did I e'er weigh, thro' duty ftrong, 
 In thy great biddings, right and wrong ? 
 Did ever Int'reft, to whom Thou 
 Can'fl not with more devotion bow, 
 Warp my found faith, or will of mine 
 la contradiction run to thine ? 
 Have I not, at thy table plac'd, 
 When bufinefs call'd aloud for hafte, 
 Torn myfelf thence, yet never heard 
 To utter one complaining word, 
 
 And
 
 T H E G H O S T. 119 
 
 And had, till thy great work was dene, 
 All appetites, as having none ? 
 Hard is it, this great plan purfu'd 
 Of Voluntary fervitude, 
 Purfued, without or fhame or fear, 
 Thro' the great circle of the Year j 
 Now to receive, in this grand hour, 
 Commands which lie beyond my pow'r ; 
 Commands which bafflle all my (kill, 
 And leave me nothing but my will : 
 Be that accepted ; let my Lord 
 Indulgence to his flave afford ; 
 This Talk, for my poor ftrength unfit, 
 Will yield to none but DULLMAN'S wit. 
 
 With fuch grofs incenfe gratified, 
 And turning up the lip of pride, 
 Poor CRAPE and ihook his empty head 
 Poor puzzled CRAVED wife DULLMAN faid, 
 Of judgment weak, of fenfe confin'd, 
 For things of lower note defign'd, 
 For things within the vulgar reach, 
 To run of errands, and to preach, 
 
 I 4 Well
 
 120 T H E G H O S T. 
 
 Well haft Thou judg'd, that heads like mine 
 Cannot want help from heads like thine ; 
 Well haft Thou judg'd thyfelf unmeet 
 Of fuch high argument to treat j 
 'Twas but to try thee that I fpoke. 
 And all I faid was but a joke. 
 
 Nor think a joke, CRAPE, a difgrace 
 Or to my Perfon, or my place ; 
 The wifeft of the Sons of Men 
 Have deign 'd to ufe them new and then. 
 The only caution, do You fee, 
 Pemanded by our dignity, 
 From common ufe and men exempt, 
 Is that they may not breed contempt. 
 Great Ufe they have, when in the hands 
 Of One, like me, who underftands, 
 Who underftands the time and place, 
 The perfons, manner, and the grace, 
 Which Fools neglecl ; fo that we find, 
 If all the requifitcs are join'd, 
 From whence a perfect joke muft fpring, 
 A joke's a very ferious thing.
 
 T H E G H O S T. 
 
 But to our bufmefs my defign, 
 Which gave fo rough a mock to thine, 
 To my Capacity is made 
 As ready as a fraud in trade, 
 Which, like Broad- Cloth, I can, with eafe, 
 Cut out in any fliape I pleafe. 
 
 Sow, in my circumftance, fome few, 
 Aye, and thofe men of Genius too, 
 Good Men, wh, without Love or Hate, 
 Whether they early rife or late, 
 With names uncrack'd, and credit found, 
 Rife worth a hundred thoufand pound, 
 By threadbare ways and means would try 
 To bear their point fo will not I. 
 New methods fhall my wifdom find 
 To fuit thefe matters to my mind, 
 So that the Infidels at Court, 
 Who make our City Wits their fport, 
 Shall hail the honours of my reign, 
 And own that DULLMAN bears a brain. 
 
 ^ in my place, to gain their ends, 
 Would give relations up, and friends ; 
 
 Would
 
 I22 T H E G H O S T. 
 
 Would lend a wife, who they might fwear 
 
 Safely, was none the worfe for wear ; 
 
 Would fee a Daughter, yet a maid, 
 
 Into a Statefman's arms betray'd, 
 
 Nay, mould the Girl prove coy, nor know 
 
 What Daughters to a Father owe, 
 
 Sooner than fchemes fo nobly plann'd 
 
 Should fail, themfelves would lend a hand ; 
 
 Would vote on one fide, whilft a brother, 
 
 Properly taught, would vote on t'other ; 
 
 Would ev'ry petty band forget ; 
 
 To public eye be with one fet, 
 
 In private with aykwwfherd, 
 And be by Proxy with a third ; 
 Would (like a ueen, of whom I read 
 The other day her name is fled- 
 In a book (where, together bound, 
 WHITTINGTON and his CAT I found, 
 A tale moft true, and. free from art, 
 Which all LORD-MAYORS mould have by heart) 
 A >ueen (O might thofe days begin 
 Afrefh when Queens would learn to fpin) 
 Who wrought, and wrought, but, for fome plot, 
 The caufe of which I've now forgot, 
 
 During
 
 T H E G H O S T. 123 
 
 During the abfence of the Sun 
 Undid what She by day had done) 
 Whilfl they a double vifage wear, 
 What's fworn by Day, by Night unfwear. 
 
 Such be their Arts, and fuch perchance 
 May happily their ends advance : 
 From a new fyftem mine (hall fpring, 
 A LOCUM-TENENS is the thing. 
 That's your true Plan to obligate 
 The prefent Minifters of State, 
 My Shadow mall our Court approach, 
 And bear my pow'r, and have my coach , 
 My fine State-Coach^ fuperb to view, 
 A fine State-Coach^ and paid for too ; 
 To curry favour, and the grace 
 Obtain, of thofe who're out of place, 
 In the mean time /that's to fay 
 / proper, 7 myfelf here flay. 
 
 But hold perhaps unto the Nation, 
 Who h^te the Scot's adminiftration, 
 To lend my Coach may feem to be 
 Declaring for the Miniftry,
 
 124 T H E G H O S T. 
 
 For where the Ci : y- Coach is, there 
 Is the true efTence of the MAYOR. 
 Therefore (for wife men are intent 
 Evils at diftance to prevent, 
 Whilft Fools the evils firft endure, 
 And then are plagu'd to feek a cure) 
 No Coach* Horfe and free from fear 
 To make our Deputy appear, 
 Faft on his back (hall he be tied, 
 With two grooms marching by his fide, 
 Then for a Horfe thro' all the land, 
 To head our folemn City-band, 
 Can any one fo fit be found, 
 As He, who in Artillery- ground^ 
 Without a Rider, noble Sight, 
 Led on our braveft troops to fight. 
 
 But firft, CRAPE, for my Honour's fake, 
 A tender point, enquiry make 
 About that Horfe, if the difpute 
 Is ended, or is ftill in fuit. 
 For whilft a caufe (obferve this plan 
 Of Juftice) whether Horfe or Man 
 
 The
 
 T H E GHOST. 
 
 The parties be, remains in doubt, 
 Till 'tis determin'd out and out, 
 That Pow'r muft tyranny appear, 
 Which fhould, Pre-judging, interfere, 
 And weak faint Judges over-awe 
 To bias the free courfe of Law. 
 
 You have my will now quickly run, 
 And take care that my will be don. 
 In public, CRAPE, You muft appear, 
 Whilft I in privacy fit here ; 
 Here (hall great DULL MAN fit alone, 
 Making this Elbow-Chair my throne, 
 And, You performing what I bid, 
 Do all, as if I nothing did. 
 
 CRAPE heard, and fpceded on his wa 
 With him to hear was to obey ; 
 Not without trouble be afTur'd, 
 A proper Proxy was procur'd 
 To ferve fuch infamous intent, 
 And fuch a Lord to reprefent, 
 Nor could one have been found at all 
 On t'other fide of Landon-tvaiL
 
 J2 6 T H E G H O S T. 
 
 The trumpet founds folemn and flow 
 Behold the grand Proceflion go, 
 All moving on ? Cat after kind, 
 As if for motion ne'er defign'd. 
 
 S) whom the Laws admit 
 To keep the Peace by breaking it j - 
 Beadles, who hold the fecond pkce 
 By virtue of a filver mace, 
 Which ev'ry Saturday is drawn, 
 For ufe of Sunday^ owt of pawn j 
 Treafurers, who with empty key 
 Secure an empty Treafury ; 
 Churchwardens, who their courfe purfne 
 In the fame ftate, as to their pew 
 Churchwardens of Saint Marg'ret go, 
 Since PEIRSON taught them pride and (how, 
 Who in fliort tranfient pomp appear, 
 Like Almanacks chang'd ev'ry year, 
 Behind whom, with unbroken locks, 
 CHARITY carries the Poor's Box, 
 Not knowing that with private keys 
 They ope and (hut it when they plcafe, 
 
 OverfeerS)
 
 T H E G H O S T. 127 
 
 Overfeers, who by frauds enfure 
 The heavy curfes of the poor ; 
 Unclean came flocking, Bulls and Bears, 
 Like Beafts into the ark, by pairs. 
 
 Portentous flaming in the van 
 Stalk'd the Profejfcr SHERIDAN ; 
 A Man of wire, a mere Pantine, 
 A downright animal Machine. 
 He knows alone in proper mode 
 How to take vengeance on an Ode, 
 And how to butcher AMMON'S Son, 
 And poor Jack Dryden both in One. 
 On all occafions next the Chair 
 He ftand for fervice of the MAYOR, 
 And to inftruct him how to ufe, 
 His y/'s and B's, and P's and ^'s. 
 O'er Letters, into tatters worn, 
 O'er Syllables, defac'd and torn, 
 O'er Words disjointed, and o'er Stnfe, 
 Left deftitute of all defence, 
 He ftrides, and all the way he goes, 
 Wades, deep in blood, o'er Crifs-Crcfs-Rows. 
 
 Before
 
 i 2 8 T H E G H O S T. 
 
 Before him ev'ry Confonant 
 In agonies is feen to pant ; 
 Behind, in forms not to be known, 
 The Ghofts of tortur'd Vowels groan. 
 
 Next HART and DUKE, well worthy grace 
 And City favour, came in place. 
 No Children can their toils engage, 
 Their toils are turn'd to Rev'rend Age, 
 When a Court-Dame, to grace his brows 
 Refolv'd, is wed to City Spoufe, 
 Their aid with Madams aid muft join 
 The aukward Dotard to refine, 
 And teach, whence trueft glory flows, 
 Grave Sixty to turn out his toes. 
 Each bore in hand a Kit, and each 
 To fhew how fit he was to teach 
 A C/Y, an Alderman^ a Mayor? 
 Led in a firing a dancing Bear. 
 
 Since the revival of Fingal, 
 Cuftom, and Cuftom's all in all, 
 Commands that we fiiould have regard, 
 On all high feafons, to the Bard. 
 
 Great
 
 THE GHOST. 129 
 
 Great a<5h like thefe, by vulgar tongue 
 Profan'd, mould not be faid, but fung. 
 This place to fill, renown 'd in fame, 
 The high and mighty LOCKMAN came, 
 And, ne'er forgot in DULLMAN'S reign, 
 With proper order to maintain 
 The Uniformity of Pride, 
 Brought Brother WHITE HE AD by his fide. 
 
 On Horfe, who proudly paw'd the ground, 
 And caft his fiery eyeballs round, 
 Snorting, and champing the rude bit, 
 As if, for warlike purpofe fit, 
 His high and gen'rous blood difdain'd 
 To be for fports and paftimes rein'd, 
 Great DYMOCK, in his glorious ftation, 
 Paraded at the Coronation. 
 Not fo our City DYMOCK came, 
 Heavy, difpirited, and tame, 
 No mark of fenfe, his eyes half-clos'd, 
 He on a mighty Dray-horfe doz'd. 
 Fate never could a horfe provide 
 So fit for fuch a man to ride, 
 
 VOL. II. K Nor
 
 , 3 o T H E G H O S T. 
 
 Nor find a Man, with ftri&eft care, 
 
 So fit for fuch a horfe to bear. 
 
 Hung round with inftruments of death, 
 
 The fight of him would ftcp the breath 
 
 Of braggart Cowardice, and make 
 
 The very Court Draivcanfir quake. 
 
 With Durhy which, in the hands of Spite, 
 
 Do their damn'd bufmefs in the Night, 
 
 From Scotland fent, but here difplay'd 
 
 Only to fill up the Parade ; 
 
 With Swords^ unflefh'd, of maiden hue, 
 
 Which Rage or Valour never drew ; 
 
 With BlunderbuJJesi taught to ricie, 
 
 Like Pocket-Pijlols, by his fide, 
 
 In girdle ftuck, he feem'd to be 
 
 A little moving Armory. 
 
 One thing much wanting to complete 
 
 7'he fight, and make a perfed treat, 
 
 Was that the Horfe (a Courtefy 
 
 I Horfes found of high degree) 
 
 Inftead of going forward on, 
 
 All the way backward mould have gone. 
 
 Horfes , unlels they breeding lack, 
 
 Some Scruple make to turn tluir back, 
 
 Tho'
 
 T H E G H O S T. 131 
 
 Tho' Riders, which plain Truth declares, 
 No fcruple make of turning theirs. 
 
 Far, far apart from all the reft, 
 Fit only for a ftanding jeft, 
 The independent (can you get 
 A better fuited Epithet ) 
 The independent AMYAND came, 
 All burning with the facred flame 
 Of Liberty, which well he knows 
 On the great ftock of flav'ry grows. 
 Like Sparrow, who, depriv'd of Mate 
 Snatch'd by the cruel hand of Fate, 
 From fpray to fpray no more will hop, 
 But fits alone on the Houfe-top, 
 Or like Himfelf, when all alone 
 At Croydon, he was heard to groan, 
 Lifting both hands in the defence 
 Of Intereft, and Common-Senfe ; 
 Both hands, for as no other man 
 Adopted and purfu'd his plan, 
 The Left-hand had been lonefome quite, 
 If He had not held up the right ^ 
 
 K 2 Apart
 
 I3 2 THE GHOST. 
 
 Apart He came, and fix'd his eyes 
 
 With rapture on a diftant prize, 
 
 On which in Letters worthy note, 
 
 There, TWENTY THOUSAND POUNDS, was wrote. 
 
 Falfe trap, for Credit fapp'd is found 
 
 By getting twenty thoufand pound ; 
 
 Nay, look not thus on Me, and ftare. 
 
 Doubting the Certainty to fwear 
 
 In fuch a cafe I mould be loth 
 
 But PERRY CUST may take his oath. 
 
 In plain and decent garb array'd, 
 With the prim Quaker, FRAUD, came TRADED 
 CONNIVANCE, to improve the plan. 
 Habited Lke a "Jury-man^ 
 Judging as Intereft prevails, 
 Came next with meafures, weights, and fcales$ 
 EXTORTION next, of hellifh race, 
 A Cub moft damn'd, to mew his face 
 Forbid by fear, but not by mame, 
 
 Turn'd to a Jew, like came j 
 
 CORRUPTION, MiDAS-like, behold 
 Turning whate'er She touch'd to gold, 
 
 IMPOTENCE
 
 THE GHOST. 133 
 
 IMPOTENCE led by LUST, and PRIDE 
 Strutting with PONTON by her fide, 
 HYPOCRISY, demure and fad, 
 In garments of the Priefthood clad, 
 So well difguis'd, that You might fwear, 
 Deceiv'd, a very Prieft was there ; 
 BANKRUPTCY, full of eafe and health, 
 And wallowing in well-fav'd wealth, 
 Came fneering thro j a ruin'd band, 
 
 And bringing B in her hand ; 
 
 VICTORY, hanging down her head, 
 Was by a highland StaHion led ; 
 PEACE, cloath'd in fables, with a face 
 Which witnefs'd fenfe of huge difgrace, 
 Which fpake a deep and rooted fliame 
 Both of Herfelf and of her Name, 
 Mourning creeps on, and bluming feels 
 WAR, grim WAR treacling on her heels ; 
 Pale CREDIT, maken by the arts 
 Of men with bad heads and worfe hearts, 
 Taking no notice of a band 
 Which near her were ordain'd to ftand, 
 Well nigh deftroy'd by fickly fit, 
 'Lock'd wiftful all around for PITT. 
 
 K 3 FREEDOM
 
 I34 T H E G H O S T. 
 
 FREEDOM at that moft hallow'd name 
 
 My Spirits mount into a flame, 
 
 Each pulfe beats high, and each nerve ftrains 
 
 E'en to the cracking ; thro' my veins 
 
 The tides of life more rapid run, 
 
 And tell me I am FREEDOM'S Son 
 
 FREEDOM came next, but fcarce was feen, 
 
 When the fky, which appear'd ferene 
 
 And gay before, was overcaft ; 
 
 Horror beftrode a foreign blaft, 
 
 And from the prifen of the North, 
 
 To FREEDOM deadly, Storms burft forth. 
 
 A Car like thofe, in which, we're told, 
 Our wild Forefathers warr'd of old, 
 Loaded with Death, fix Horfes bear 
 Thro' the blank region of the air. 
 Too fierce for time or art to tamCj 
 They pour'd forth mingled fmoke and flame 
 From their wide Noftrils ; ev'ry Steed 
 Was of that ancient favage breed 
 Which fell GERYON nurs'd ; their food 
 The fle(h of Man, their drink his blood. 
 
 On
 
 T H E G H O S T. 135 
 
 On the firft Horfes, ill-match'd pair, 
 This fat and fleek, That lean and bare, 
 Came ill-match'd Riders fide by fide, 
 And POVERTY was yok'd with PRIDE. 
 Union moft ftrange it mutt appear, 
 Till other Unions make it clear. 
 
 Next, in the gall of bitternefs, 
 With rage, which words can ill exprefs, 
 With unforgiving rage, which fprings 
 From a falfe zeal for holy things, 
 Wearing fuch robes as Prophets wear, 
 Falfe Prophets plac'd in PETER'S chair, 
 On which, in Characters of fire, 
 Shapes Antic, horrible and dire, 
 Inwoven flam'd, where, to the view, 
 In groups appear'd a rabble crew 
 Of Sainted Devils, where all round 
 Vile Reliques of vile men were found, 
 Who, worfe than Devils, from the birth 
 Perform'd the work of Hell on earth, 
 "Jugglery Inquifitors, and Popes, 
 Pointing at axes, wheels, and ropes, 
 
 K 4 And
 
 136 THE GHOST. 
 
 And Engines, fram'd on horrid plan, 
 
 Which none but the deftroyer, Man, 
 
 Could, to promote his felfifli views, 
 
 Have heads to make, or hearts to ufe, 
 
 Bearing, to confecrate her tricks, 
 
 In her left-hand a Crucifix^ 
 
 Remembrance of Our dying Lord, 
 
 And in her right a tw o-edg 'dfword j 
 
 Having her brows, in impious fport, 
 
 Adorn'd with words of high import, 
 
 On earth PEACE, amongjl men, GOOD WILL, 
 
 LOVE bearing? zn& forbearing ftill, 
 
 All wrote in the hearts-blood of thofe 
 
 Who rather Death than Falfhood chofe ; 
 
 On her breaft, (where, in days of Yore, 
 
 When God lov'd Jews, the HIGH-PRIEST wore 
 
 Thofe Grades, which were decreed 
 
 T' inftrucl: and guide the chofen feed) 
 
 Having with glory clad and ftrength, 
 
 The VIRGIN- piclur'd aty#// length^ 
 
 Whilft at her feet, iny#zfl//pourtray'd, 
 
 As fcarce worth notice, CHRIST was -laid, 
 
 Came SUPERSTITION, fierce and fell. 
 
 An Imp detefted, e'en in hell j 
 
 Her
 
 THE GHOST. 137 
 
 Her Eye inflam'd, her face all o'er 
 Foully befmear'd with human gore, 
 O'er heaps of mangled Saints She rode ; 
 Faft at her heels DEATH proudly ftrode, 
 And grimly fmil'd, well-pleas'd to fee 
 Such havock of mortality. 
 Clofe by her fide, on mifchief bent, 
 And urging on each bad intent 
 To its full bearing, Savage, Wild, 
 The Mother fit of fuch a child, 
 Striving the empire to advance 
 Of Sin and Death, came IGNORANCE. 
 
 With looks, where dread command was plac'd, 
 And Sov'reign Pow'r by Pride difgrac'd, 
 Where, loudly witnefling a mind 
 Of favage more than human kind, 
 Not chufing to be lov'd, but fear'd, 
 Mocking at right, MISRULE appear'd, 
 With Eyeballs glaring fiery red 
 Enough to ftrike beholders dead, 
 Gnaming his teeth, and in a flood 
 Pouring corruption forth and blood 
 
 From
 
 13 8 T H E G H O S -T. 
 
 From his chaf'd jaws ; without remorfe 
 Whipping, and fpurring on his horfe, 
 Whofe fides, in their own blood embay'd, 
 E'en to the bone were open laid, 
 Came TYRANNY ; difdaining awe, 
 And trampling over Senfe and Law. 
 One thing and only one He knew, 
 One object only would purfue, 
 Tho' Lefs (fo low doth paffion bring) 
 Than man, he would be more than King, 
 
 With ev'ry argument and art, 
 Which might corrupt the head and heart, 
 Soothing the frenzy of his mind, 
 Companion meet, was FLATT'RY join'd. 
 Winning his carriage, ev'ry look 
 Employ'd, whilft it conceal'd a hook; 
 When fimple moft, moft to be fear'd ; 
 Moft crafty, when no craft appear'd ; 
 His tales, no man like him could tell ; 
 His words, which melted as they fell, 
 Might e'en a Hypocrite deceive, 
 And make an infidel believe, 
 
 W T antonly
 
 T H E G H O S T. 139 
 
 Wantonly cheating o'er and o'er 
 Thofe who had cheated been before, 
 Such FLATT'RY came in evil hour, 
 Pois'ning the royal ear of pow'r, 
 And, grown by Proftitution great, 
 Would be firft Minifter of State. 
 
 Within the Chariot, all alone, 
 High feated on a kind of throne, 
 With pebbles grac'd, a Figure came, 
 Whom Juftice would, but dare not, name. 
 Hard times when Juftice, without fear, 
 Dare not bring forth to public ear 
 The names of thofe, who dare offend 
 'Gainft Juftice, and pervert her end j 
 But, if the Mufe afford me grace, 
 Defcription mail fupply the place. 
 
 In foreign garments he was clad, 
 Sage Ermine o'er the glofly Plaid, 
 Caft rev'rend honour, on his heart, 
 Wrought by the curious hand of Art, 
 In filver wrought, and brighter far 
 Than heav'nly or than earthly Star, 
 
 Shone
 
 , 4 o T H E G H O S T. 
 
 Shone a White Refe, the Emblem dear 
 
 Of him He ever muft revere, 
 
 Of that dread Lord, who, with lite hoft 
 
 Of faithful native rebels loft, 
 
 Like thofe black Spirits doom'd to hell, 
 
 At once from pow'r and virtue fell ; 
 
 Around his clouded brows was plac'd 
 
 A Bonnet, moft fuperbly grac'd 
 
 With mighty Thiftles, nor forgot 
 
 The fccred motto, Touch me not. 
 
 In the right-hand a fword He bore 
 Harder than Adamant, and more 
 Fatal than winds, which from the mouth 
 Of the rough North invade the South j 
 The reeking blade to view prefents 
 The blood of helplefs Innocents, 
 And on the hilt, as" meek become 
 As Lambs before the Shearers dumb, 
 With downcaft eye, and folemn mow, 
 Of deep unutterable woe, 
 Mourning the time when FREEDOM reign'd, 
 Faft to a rock was Juftice chain'd. 
 
 In
 
 T H E G H O S T. 141 
 
 In his left hand, in wax impreft, 
 With bells and gewgaws idly dreft, 
 An Image, caft in baby mould, 
 He held, and feem'd o'erjoy'd to hold. 
 On this he fix'd his eyes, to this 
 Bowing he gave the loyal kifs, 
 And, for Rebellion fully ripe, 
 Seem'd to defire the ANTITYPE. 
 What if to that Pretender's foes 
 His greatnefs, nay, his life he owes, 
 Shall common obligations bind, 
 And make his ccnftancy of mind ? 
 Scorning fuch weak and petty chains, 
 Faithful to JAMES he ftill remains, 
 Tho' he the friend of GEORGE appear : 
 DiJJlmulations Virtue here. 
 
 Jealous and Mean, he with a frown 
 Would awe, and keep all merit down, 
 Nor would to Truth and Juftice bend, 
 Unlefs out-lullied\yj his friend ; 
 Brave with the Coward, with the brave 
 He is himfelf a Coward (lave j 
 
 Aw'd
 
 I4 2 T H E G H O S T. 
 
 Aw'd by his fears, he has no heart 
 
 To take a great and open part ; 
 
 Mines in a fubtle train he fprings, 
 
 And, fecret, faps the ears of Kings ; 
 
 But not e'en there continues firm 
 
 'Gainft the refiftance of a worm ; 
 
 Born in a Country, where the will 
 
 Of One is Law to all, he dill 
 
 Retain'd th' infection, with full aim 
 
 To fpread it wherefoe'er he came ; 
 
 Freedom he hated, Law defied, 
 
 The Proftitute of Pow'r and Pride ; 
 
 Law he with eafe explains away, 
 
 And leads bewilder'd Senfe aftray ; 
 
 Much to the credit of his brain 
 
 Puzzles the caufe he can't maintain, 
 
 Proceeds on moft familiar grounds, 
 
 And, where he can't convince, confounds ; 
 
 Talents of rarefl ftamp and fize, 
 
 To Nature falfe, he mifapplies, 
 
 And turns to poifon what was fent 
 
 For purpofes of nourimment. 
 
 Palenefs,
 
 T H E G H O S T. 143 
 
 Paknefs, not fuch as on his wings 
 The Meffenger of Sicknefs brings, 
 But fuch as takes its coward rife 
 From confcious bafenefs, confcious vice, 
 O'erfpread his checks - t Difdaln and Pride, 
 To upftart Fortunes ever tied, 
 Scowl'd on his brow j within his eye, 
 Infidious, lurking like a fpy 
 To Caution principled by Fear, 
 Not daring open to appear, 
 Lodg'd covert Miftbuft PaJJlon hung 
 On his lip quiv'ring j on his tongue 
 Fraud dwelt at large ; within his bread 
 All that makes Villain found a neft, 
 All that, on hell's com pleated plan, 
 E'er join'd to damn the heart of man, 
 
 Soon as the Car reach 'd land, He role, 
 And with a look which might have fro/e 
 The heart's beft blood, which was enough 
 Had hearts been made of fterner ftufr" 
 In Cities than elfewhere, to make 
 The very ftouteft quail und quake, 
 
 lie
 
 , 4+ THE GHOST, 
 
 He caft his baleful eyes around ; 
 
 Fix'd without motion to the ground, 
 
 Fear waiting on fururize, All flood, 
 
 And Horror chill'd their curdled blood^ 
 
 No more they thought of Pomp> no more 
 
 (For they had feen his face before) 
 
 Of Law they thought ; the caufe forgot, 
 
 Whether it was or Ghoft, or Plot, 
 
 Which drew them there. They all flood more 
 
 Like Statues than they were before. 
 
 What could be done ? Could Art, could Force, 
 Or Both direct a proper courfe 
 To make this favage Monfter tame, 
 Or fend him back the way he came ? 
 What neither Art, nor Force, nor Both 
 Could do, a Lord of foreign growth, 
 A Lord to that bafe wretch allied 
 In Country, not in Vice and Pride, 
 Effeaed ; from the felf-fame land, 
 (Bad news for our blafpheming band 
 Of Scribblers, but deferving note) 
 The Poifon came, and Antidote. 
 
 Abafh'd
 
 T H E G H O S T. 145 
 
 'Abafh'd the Monfter hung his head ; 
 And, like an empty Vifion, fled j 
 His Train, like Virgin Snows which run, 
 Kifs'd by the burning bawdy Sun, 
 To lovefick ftreams, diflblv'd in Air ; 
 JOY, who from abfence feem'd more fair, 
 Came fmiling, freed from flavifh awe ; 
 LOYALTY, LIBERTY, and LAW, 
 Impatient of the galling chain, 
 And Yoke of pow'r, refum'd their reign j 
 And, burning with the glorious flame 
 Of Public Virtue, MANSFIELD came. 
 
 END OF THE GHOST. 
 
 VOL. II. L THE
 
 THE 
 
 CONFERENCE.
 
 THE 
 
 CONFERENCE, 
 
 GRACE faid in form, which Sceptics muft agree, 
 When they are told that Grace was faid by Me j 
 The Servants gone, to break the fcurvy jeft 
 On the proud Landlord, and his thread -bare gueft j 
 The King gone round, my Lady too withdrawn, 
 My Lord, in ulpl tafte, began to yawn, 
 And lolling backward in his elbow-chair, 
 With an infipid kind of ftupid flare, 
 
 L 3 Picking
 
 i 5 o THE CONFERENCE. 
 
 Picking his teeth, twirling his feals about 
 
 CHURCHILL, You have a Poem coming out. 
 
 You've my beft wifhes ; but I really fear 
 
 Your Mufe in general is too fevere, 
 
 Her Spirit feems her int'reft to oppofe, 
 
 And where (he makes one friend, makes twenty foes. 
 
 C) Your Lordfi sip's fears are juft, I feel their force, 
 But only feel it as a thing of courfe. 
 The man whofe hardy fpirit (hall engage 
 To lam the vices of a guilty age, 
 At his firft fetting forward ought to know, 
 That ev'ry rogue he meets muft be his foe, 
 That the rude breath of Satire will provoke 
 Many who feel, and more who fear the ftroke. 
 But (hall the partial rage of felfim men 
 From ftubborn juftice wrench the righteous pen, 
 Or mall I not my fettled courfe purfue, 
 Becaufe my foes, are foes to Virtue too ? 
 
 L. What is this boafted Virtue, taugfit in fchools, 
 And idly drawn from antiquated ruies ? 
 What is her ufe ? pbfrit out one wholefome end ? 
 Will me hurt foes, or can (he make a friend ? 
 
 When
 
 THE CONFERENCE. 
 
 When from long fafts fierce appetites arife, 
 Can this fame Virtue ftifle Nature's cries ? 
 Can me the pittance of a meal afford, 
 Or bid thee welcome to one great man's board ? 
 When northern winds the rough December arm 
 With froft and fnow, can Virtue keep thee warm ? 
 Canft thou difmifs the hard unfeeling Dun 
 Barely by faying, Thou art Virtue's Son ? 
 Or by bafe blundring Statefmen fent to jail, 
 Will MANSFIELD take this Virtue for thy bail ? 
 Believe it not, the name is in difgrace, 
 Virtue and TEMPLE now are out of place. 
 
 Quit then this meteor, whofe delufive ray 
 From wealth and honour leads thee far aftray. 
 True Virtue means, let Reafon ufe her eyes, 
 Nothing with Fools, and Int'reft with the Wife. 
 Would'ft thou be great, her patronage difclaim, 
 Nor madly triumph in fo .mean a name : 
 Let nobler wreaths thy happy brows adorn, 
 And leave to Virtue poverty and fcorn. 
 Let Prudence be thy guide ; who doth not know 
 How feldom Prudence can with Virtue go ? 
 
 L 4
 
 i 5 2 THE CONFERENCE. 
 
 To be fuccefsful try thy utmoft force, 
 And Virtue follows as a thing of courfe. 
 
 HIRCO, who knows not HIRCO, ftains the bed 
 Of that kind Mafter who firft gave him bread, 
 Scatters the feeds of difcord thro' the land, 
 Breaks ev'ry public, ev'ry private band, 
 Beholds with joy a trufting friend undone, 
 Betrays a Brother, and would cheat a Son : 
 What mortal in his fenfes can endure 
 The name of HIRCO, for the wretch is poor ! 
 " Let him hang, drown, ftarve, on a dunghill rot, 
 4< By all detefted live, and die forgot ; 
 " Let him, a poor return, in ev'ry breath 
 " Feel all death's pains, yet be whole years in death," 
 Is now the gen'ral cry we all puriue ; 
 Let FORTUNE change^ and PRUDENCE changes too, 
 Supple and pliant a new fyftem feels, 
 Throws up her Cap, and fpaniels at his heels, 
 Long live great HIRCO, cries, by int'reft taught r 
 And let his foes y tho' I prove one, be nought. 
 
 C. Peace to fuch Men, if fnch Men can have- peace, 
 Let their Pofilfiions, let their State increafe, 
 
 Let
 
 THE CONFERENCE. 153 
 
 Let their bafe fervices in Courts ftrike root, 
 . And in the feafon bring forth golden fruit, 
 1 envy not ; let thofe who have the will, 
 And, with fo little Spirit, fo much /kill, 
 With fuch vile inftruments their fortunes carve j 
 Rogues may grow fat, an honefl man dares ftarve. 
 
 L. Thefe ftale conceits thrown off, let us advance 
 For once to real life, and quit Romance. 
 Starve! pretty talking ! but I fain would view 
 That man, that honefl man, would do it too. 
 Hence to yon mountain which outbraves the fx.y t 
 And dart from pole to pole thy ftrengthen'd eye, 
 Thro' all that fpsce you (hall not view one man, 
 Not one, who dares to acl en fuch a plan. 
 Cowards in calms will fay, what in a ftorra, 
 The Brave will tremble at, and not perform. 
 Thine be the proof, and, fpite of all you've faid, 
 You'd give your Honour for a cruft of bread. 
 
 C. What Proof might do, what Hunger might effecfr, 
 What famifli'd Nature, looking with ncglecl 
 Qn all me once held dear, what Fear, at ftrife 
 With fainting Virtue for the means of life, 
 
 Might
 
 154 THE CONFERENCE. 
 
 Might make this coward flefli, in love with breath, 
 Shudd'ring at pain, and fhrinking back from death, 
 In treafon to my foul, defcend to bear, 
 Trufting to Fate, I neither know nor care. 
 
 Once, at this hour thofe wounds afrefh I feel, 
 Which nor profperity nor time can heal, 
 Thofe wounds, which Fate feverely hath decreed, 
 Mention'd or thought of, muft for ever bleed, 
 Thofe wounds, which humbled all that pride of man, 
 Which brings fuch mighty aid to Virtue's plan ; 
 Once, aw'd by Fortune's mofl oppreffive frown, 
 By legal rapine to the earth bow'd down, 
 My credit at laft gafp, my ftate undone, 
 Trembling to meet the fhock I could not {hun, 
 Virtue gave ground, and black defpair prevail'd ; 
 Sinking beneath the ftorm, my fpirits fail'd, 
 Like PETER'S Faith, 'till One, a Friend indeed, 
 May all diftrefs find fuch in time of need, 
 One kind good man, in aft, in word, in thought, 
 By Virtue guided, and by Wifdom taught, 
 Image of him whom Chriftians mould adore, 
 Stretch'd forth his hand, and brought me fafe to fhore. 
 
 Since,,
 
 THE CONFERENCE. 
 
 Since, by good fortune into notice rais'd, 
 And for fome little merit largely prais'd, 
 Indulg'd in fwcrving from prudential rules, 
 Hated by rogues, and not belov'd by fools, 
 Plac'd above want, (hall abject thirft of wealth 
 So fiercely war 'gainft my foul's deareft health, 
 That, as a boon, I fliould bafe (hackles crave, 
 And, born to freedom, make myfelf a Have ; 
 That I mould in the train of thofe appear, 
 Whom Honour cannot love, nor Manhood fear ? 
 
 That I no longer fkulk from ftreet to ftreet, 
 Afraid left Duns aflhil, and Bailiffs meet ; 
 That I from place to place this carcafe bear, 
 Walk forth at large, and wander free as air ; 
 That I no longer dread the aukward friend, 
 Whofe very obligations muft offend, 
 Nor, all too forward, with impatience burn 
 At fufPring favours which 1 can't return ; 
 That, from dependance and from pride fecure, 
 I am not plac'd 10 high ty fcorn the poor, 
 Nor yet fo low, that 1 my Lord ihould fear, 
 Or hefitate to give him fneer for fneer j
 
 J5 6 THE CONFERENCE. 
 
 That, whilft fage Prudence my purfuits confirms, 
 
 I can enjoy the world on equal terms ; 
 
 That, kind to others, to myfelf moft true, 
 
 Feeling no want, I comfort thofe who do, 
 
 And with the will have power to aid diftrefs ; 
 
 Thefe, and what other bleffings I poflefs, 
 
 From the indulgence of the PUBLIC rife ; 
 
 All private patronage my foul deiies. 
 
 By Candour more inclin'd to fave, than damn, 
 
 A gen'rous PUBLIC made me what I Am. 
 
 All that I have, They gave j juft mem'ry bears 
 
 The grateful ftamp, and what I am is Theirs. 
 
 L. To feign a red-hot zeal for Freedom's caufe, 
 To mouth| aloud for liberties and laws, 
 For public good to bellow alj abroad, 
 Serves well the purpofes of private fraud. 
 Prudence, by public good intends her own j 
 If you mean otherwife, you (land alone. 
 What do we mean by Country and by Court,. 
 What is it to Oppofe, what to Support ? 
 Mere words of courfe, and what is more abfurd 
 Than to pay homage to an empty word ! 
 
 MAJORS
 
 THE CONFERENCE. 157 
 
 MAJORS and MINORS differ but in name, 
 Patriots and Minifters are much the (lime ; 
 The only difference, after all their rout, 
 Is that the One is in, the Other out. 
 
 Explore the dark recefles of the mind, 
 In the Soul's honeft volume read mankind, 
 And own, in wife and fimple, great and fmall, 
 The fame grand leading Principle in All. 
 Whate'er we talk of wifdom to the wife, 
 Of goodnefs to the good, of public ties 
 Which to our country link, of private bands 
 Which claim moft dear attention at our hands, 
 For Parent and for Child, for Wife and Friend, 
 Our firft great Mover, and our laft great End, 
 Is One, and, by whatever name we call 
 The ruling Tyrant SELF is All in All. 
 This, which unwilling Faction, fhall admit^ 
 Guided in different ways a BUTE and PITT, 
 Made Tyrants break, made Kings obfervc the hw, 
 And gave the world a STUART and NASSAU. 
 
 Hath Nature (ftrange and wild conceit of Pride) 
 Diftinguifh'd thee from all her fons beficle ? 
 
 Doth
 
 158 THE CONFERENCE. 
 
 Doth Virtue in thy bofom brighter glow, 
 Or from a fpring more pure doth Aclion flow ? 
 Is not thy foul bound with thofe very chains 
 Which (hackle us, or is that SELF, which reigns 
 O'er Kings and Beggars, which in all we fee 
 Moft ftrong and fov'reign, only weak in Thee ? 
 Fond man, believe it not j experience tells 
 'Tis not thy Virtue, but thy Pride rebels. 
 Think (and for once lay by thy lawlefs pen) 
 Think, and confefs thyfelf like other men ; 
 Think but one hour, and, to thy Confcience led 
 By Reafon's hand, bow down and hang thy head j 
 Think on thy private life, recal thy youth, 
 View thyfelf now, and own with ftricleft truth, 
 That SELF hath drawn thee from fair Virtue's way 
 Farther than Folly would have dar'd to ftray, 
 And that the talents lib'ral Nature gave 
 To make thee free, have made thee more a Have. 
 
 Quit then, in prudence quit, that idle train 
 Of toys, which have fo long abus'd thy brain, 
 And captive led thy pow'rs j with boundlefs will 
 Let SELF maintain her ftate and empire ftill, 
 
 But
 
 THE CONFERENCE. 159 
 
 But let her, with more worthy objects caught, 
 Strain all the faculties and force of thought 
 To things of higher daring ; let her range 
 Thro' better paftures, and learn how to change j 
 Let her, no longer to weak faction tied, 
 Wifely revolt, and join our ftronger fide. 
 
 C. Ah ! what, my Lord, hath private life to do 
 With things of public nature ? why to view 
 Would you thus cruelly thofe fcenes unfold, 
 Which, without pain and horror to behold, 
 Muft fpeak me fomething more, or lefs than man ; 
 Which Friends may pardon, but I never can ? 
 Look back ! a thought which borders on defpair, 
 Which human nature muft, yet cannot bear. 
 'Tis not the babbling of a bufy world, 
 Where praife and cenfure are at random hurl'd, 
 Which can the meaneft of my thoughts controul, 
 Or (hake one fettled purpofe of my foul. 
 Free and at large might their wild curfes roam, 
 If All, if All alas ! were well at home. 
 No 'tis the tale which angry Confcience tells, 
 When (he with more than tragic horror fweils 
 
 Each
 
 160 THE CONFERENCE. 
 
 Each circumftance of guilt ; when ftern, but true, 
 
 She brings bad actions forth into review ; 
 
 And, like the dread hand-writing on the wall, 
 
 Bids late Remorfe awake at Reafon's call, 
 
 Arm'd at all points bids Scorpion Vengeance pafs, 
 
 And to the mind holds up Reflection's glafs, 
 
 The mind, which flatting, heaves the heart-felt groan, 
 
 And hates that form me knows to be her own. 
 
 Enough of this let private forrows reft 
 As to the Public I dare (land the left ; 
 Dare proudly boaft, I feel no wi(h above 
 The good of ENGLAND, and my Country's love. 
 Stranger to party-rage, by Reafon's voice, 
 Unerring guide, directed in my choice, 
 Not all the tyrant pow'rs of earth combin'd, 
 No, nor of hell, (hall make me change my mind. 
 What ! herd with men my honeft foul difdains, 
 Men who, with fervile zeal, are forging chains 
 For Freedom's neck, and lend a helping hand, 
 To fpread deftruction o'er my native land. 
 What ! (hall I not, e'en to my lateft breath, 
 In the full face of danger and of death. 
 
 Exert
 
 
 THE CONFERENCE. *6j 
 
 Exert that little ftrength which Nature gave, 
 And boldly ftem, or perilh in the wave ? 
 
 L. When I look backward for fome fifty years, 
 And fee Protejling Patriots turn'd to Peers j 
 Hear men, moft loofe, for decency declaim, 
 And talk of Character without a name j 
 See Infidels aflert the caufe of God, 
 And meek Divines wield Perfecution's rod j 
 See men transform'd to brutes, and brutes to men, 
 See WHITEHEAD take a place, Ralph change his pen, 
 I mock the zeal, and deem the men in fport, 
 Who rail at Minifters, and curfe a Court. 
 Thee, haughty as thou art, and proud in rime, 
 Shall fome Preferment, ofFer'd at a time 
 When Virtue fleeps, fome Sacrifice to Pride, 
 Or fome fair Victim, move to change thy fide. 
 Thee mail thefe eyes behold, to health reftor'd, 
 Ufing, as Prudence bids, bold Satire's fvvord, 
 Galling thy prefent friends, and praifmg thofe, 
 Whom now thy frenzy holds thy greateft foes. 
 
 C. May I, (can worfe difgrace on manhood fall ?) 
 Ee horn a WHITEHEAD, and baptiz'd a PAUL ; 
 
 VOL. II. M May
 
 *6 2 THE CONFERENCE. 
 
 May I (tho' to his fervice deeply tied 
 
 By facred oaths, 'and now by will allied) 
 
 With falfe feign'd zeal an injur'd God defend, 
 
 And ufe his name for fome bafe private end ; 
 
 May I (that thought bids double horrors roll 
 
 O'er my fick fpirits, and unmans my foul) 
 
 Ruin the Virtue 'which I held moft dear, 
 
 And ftill muft hold ; may I, thro' abject fear, 
 
 Betray my friend ; may to fucceeding times, 
 
 Engrav'd on plates of adamant, my crimes 
 
 Stand blazing forth, whilft mark'd with envious blot, 
 
 Each little act of Virtue is forgot ; 
 
 Of all thofe evils which, to ftamp men curs'd, 
 
 Hell keeps in. flore for vengeance, may the word 
 
 Light on my head, and in my day of woe, 
 
 To make the cup of bitternefs o'erflow, 
 
 May I be fcorn'd by ev'ry man of worth, 
 
 Wander, like Cain, a vagabond on earth, 
 
 Bearing about a hell in my own mind, 
 
 Or be to SCOTLAND for my life confin'd, 
 
 If I am one among the many known, 
 
 WhomSHLBURNgfled,andCALCRAFTblufli'dtoown. 
 
 L. Do
 
 THE CONFERENCE. 163 
 L. Do you reflecl: what men you make your foes ? 
 
 C. I do, and that's the reafon I-oppofe. 
 Friends I have made, whom Envy mull coinmend, 
 But not one foe, whom I would wifh a friend. 
 What if ten thoufand BUTES and HOLLANDS bawl, 
 One WILKES hath made a large amends for all. 
 
 'Tis not the Title, whether handed down 
 From age to age, or flowing from the crown 
 In copious ftreams on recent men, who came 
 From ftems unknown, and fires without a name j 
 'Tis not the Star, which our great EDWARD gave 
 To mark the virtuous, and reward the brave, 
 Blazing without, whilft a bafe heart within 
 Is rotten to the core with filth and fin ; 
 'Tis not the tinfel grandeur, taught to wait, 
 At cuflom's call, to- mark a fool of State 
 From fools of lefler note, that Soul can awe 
 Whofe Pride is Reafon, whofe Defence is Law. 
 
 L. Suppofe (a thing fcarce poflible in Art, 
 Were it thy Cue to play a common Part j) 
 
 M 2 Suppofc
 
 164 THE CONFERENCE. 
 
 Suppofe thy Writings fo well fenc'd in Law, 
 
 That N cannot find, nor make a Flaw, 
 
 H^ft thou not heard, that 'mongft our ancient Tribes* 
 By Party warpt, or hill'd afleep by Bribes, 
 Or trembling at the Ruffian Hand of Force, 
 Law- hath fufpended flood, or chang'd its Courfe ? 
 Art thou aflur'd, that, for Destruction ripe, 
 Thou may'ft not fmart beneath the felf-fame Gripe I 
 What Sanction haft thou, frantic in thy Rimes,. 
 Thy Life, thy Freedom to fecure ? 
 
 C: The Times. 
 
 'Tis not on Law, a Syftem great and good, 
 By Wifdom penn'd, and bought by nobleft Blood, 
 My Faith relies : By wicked Men and vain, 
 Law, once abus'd, may be abus'd again.- 
 No, on our great Law-giver I depend, 
 Who knows and guides her to her proper End j 
 Whofe Royalty of Nature blazes out 
 So fierce, 'twere Sin to entertain a doubt 
 Did Tyrant STUARTS now the Laws difpenfej. 
 ( Bleft be the hour and hand which fent them hence) 
 For fomething, or for nothing, for a word, 
 Or thought, I might be doom'd to Death, unheard. 
 
 Life
 
 THE CONFERENCE. 165 
 
 Life we might all refign to Jawlefs Pow'r, 
 Nor think it worth the purchafe of an hour ; 
 But Envy ne'er (hall fix fo foul a ftain 
 On the fair annals of a BRUNSWICK'S reign. 
 
 If, Slave to Party, to Revenge, or Pride,, 
 If, by frail human Error drawn afide, 
 I break the Law, ftric"l rigour let her wear ; 
 'Tis her's to punifh, and 'tis mine to bear ; 
 Nor, by the voice of Juftice doom'd to death, 
 Would I afk rnercy with my lateft breath. 
 But, anxious only for my Country's good, 
 In which my King's, of courfe, is understood ; 
 Form'd on a plan with fome few Patriot friends, 
 Whilft by juft means I aim at noblefl ends, 
 My Spirits cannot fink ; tho' from the tomb 
 Stern JEFFRIES mould be plac'd in MANSFIELD'S room, 
 Tho' he mould bring, his bafe defigns to aid, 
 Some black Attorney^ for his purpofe made, 
 And (hove, whilft Decency and Law retreat, 
 The modeft NORTON from his Maiden feat, 
 Tho' both, in ill Confed'rates, fhould agree, 
 In damned league, to torture Law and me, 
 
 M 3 Whilft
 
 i66 THE CONFERENCE. 
 
 Whilft GEORGE is King, I cannot fear endure i 
 Not to be guilty, is to be fecure. 
 
 But when, in after-times, (be far remov'd 
 That day) our Monarch, glorious and belov'd, 
 Sleeps with his Fathers, fhould imperious Fate, 
 In vengeance, with frefh STUARTS curfe our ftate ; 
 Should they, o'erieaping ev'ry fence of Law, 
 Butcher the brave to keep tame fools in awej 
 Should they, by brutal and oppreffive force, 
 Divert fweet Juftice from her even courfe ; 
 Should they, of ev'ry other means bereft, 
 Make my right-hand a witnefs 'gainft my left ; 
 Should they, abroad by Inquiiltions taught, 
 Search out my Soul, and damn me for a thought, 
 Still would I keep my courfe, ftill fpeak, ftill write, 
 'Till Death had plung'd me in the (hades of Night. 
 
 Thou GOD of Truth, thou great, all-fearching Eye, 
 To whom our Thoughts, our Spirits open lie, 
 Grant me thy ftrength, and in that needful hour, 
 (Should it e'er come) when Law fubmits to Pow'r, 
 With firm refolve my fteady bofom fteel, 
 Bravely to fuffer, tho' I deeply feel. 
 
 Let
 
 THE CONFERENCE. 167 
 
 Let me, as hitherto, dill draw my breath, 
 In love with life, but not in fear of death, 
 And, if Oppreflion brings me to the grave, 
 And marks me dead, fhe ne'er mall mark a flave, 
 Let no unworthy marks of grief be heard, 
 No wild laments, not one unfeemly word j 
 Let fober Triumphs wait upon my bier, 
 I won't forgive that friend who drops one tear. 
 Whether he's ravifh'd in life's early morn, 
 Or, in old age, drops like an ear of Corn, 
 Full ripe he falls, on Nature's nobleft plan, 
 Who lives to Reafon, and who dies a Man. 
 
 THE END. 
 
 MA THE
 
 THE 
 
 AUTHOR.
 
 
 O H
 
 THE 
 
 AUTHOR 
 
 A C C U R S 'D the man, whom fate ordains in fpite, 
 **- And cruel parents teach, to Read and Write ! 
 What need of letters ? Wherefore mould we fpell ? 
 Why write our names ? A mark will do as well. 
 
 Much are the precious hours of youth mifpent, 
 In climbing Learning's rugged fieep afcent ; 
 When to the top the bold advent Yer's got, 
 He reigns, vain monarch, o'er a barren fpot, 
 
 Whilft
 
 i 7 2 T H E A U T H O R. 
 
 Whi'ft in the vale of Ignorance below, 
 FOLLY and VICE to rank luxuriance grow ; 
 Honours and wealth pour in on ev'ry fide, 
 And proud preferment rolls her golden tide, 
 
 O'er crabbed authors life's gay prime to wafte, 
 To cramp wild genius in the chains of tafle, 
 To bear the flavifh drudgery of fchools, 
 And tamely ftoop to ev'ry pedant's rules, 
 For feven long years debarr'd of lib'ral eafe, 
 To plod in college trammels to degrees, 
 Beneath the weight of folemn toys to groan, 
 Sleep over books, and leave mankind unknown, 
 To praife each fenior blockhead's thread-bare tale, 
 And laugh till reafon blufh, and fpirits fail, 
 Manhood with vile fubmiffion to difgrace, 
 And cap the fool, whofe merit is his Place ; 
 VICE CHANCELLORS, whofe knowledge is but fmall, 
 And CHANCELLORS, who nothing know at all, 
 Ill-brook'd the gen'rous Spirit in thofe days 
 When Learning was the certain road to praife, 
 When Nobles, with a love of Science blefs'd., 
 Approv'd in others what themfelves poflefs'd. 
 
 But
 
 THE AUTHOR. 173 
 
 But Now, when DULLNESS rears aloft her throne, 
 When LORDLY ValTals her wide Empire own, 
 When Wit, feduc'd by Envy, ftarts afide, 
 And bafely leagues with Ignorance and Pride, 
 What Now (hould tempt us, by falfe hopes miflcd, 
 Learning's unfafhionable paths to tread ; 
 To bear thofe labours, which our Fathers bore, 
 That Crown with-held, which they in triumph wore ? 
 
 When with much pains this boafted Learning's got, 
 *Tis an affront to thofe who have it not. 
 Jn fome it caufes hate, in others fear, 
 Inftructs our foes to rail, our friends to fneer. 
 With prudent hafte the worldly-minded fool, 
 Forgets the little which he learn'd at School ; 
 The Elder Brother, to vaft fortunes born, 
 Looks on all Science with an Eye of Scorn ; 
 Dependent Brethren the fame features wear, 
 And younger Sons are ftupid as the Heir. 
 In Senates, at the Bar, in Church and State, 
 Genius is vile, and Learning out of date. 
 
 Is this O Death to think ! is this the Land 
 Where Merjt and Reward went hand in hand, 
 
 Where
 
 , 74 THE AUTHOR, 
 
 Where Heroes, Parent-like, the Poet view'd, 
 
 By whom they faw their glorious deeds renew'd ; 
 
 Where Poets, true to Honour, tun'd their lays, 
 
 And by their Patrons fan&ify'd their praife ? 
 
 Is this the Land, where, on our SPENCER'S tongue, 
 
 Enamour'd of his voice, Defcription hung ; 
 
 Where JONS ON rigid gravity beguil'd, 
 
 Whilfl Reafon thro' her Critic fences fmil'd j 
 
 WhereNATURElift'm'ngftoodjWhilftSHAKESPEARpIay'd, 
 
 And wonder'd at the Work herfelf had made ? 
 
 Is this the Land, where, mindful of her charge 
 
 And office high, fair Freedom walk'd at large ; 
 
 Where, finding in our Laws a fure defence, 
 
 She mock'd at all reftraints, but thofe of Senfe ; 
 
 Where health and honour trooping by her fide, 
 
 She fpread her facred empire far and wide ; 
 
 Pointed the way, Affliction to beguile, 
 
 And bade the face of Sorrow wear a fmile, 
 
 Bade thofe, who dare obey the gen'rous call, 
 
 Enjoy her bleffings, which GOD meant for all ? 
 
 Is this the Land, where in fome Tyrant's reign, 
 
 When a weak, wicked, Minijlerial train, 
 
 The tools of pow'r, the (laves cf int'reft, plann'd 
 
 Their Country's ruin, and with bribes ummn'J 
 
 Thofe
 
 THE A U T H O R. i; 
 
 Thofe wretches, who, ordain'd in Freedom's caufe, 
 
 Gave up our liberties, and fold our laws ; 
 
 When Pow'r was taught by Meannefs where to go, 
 
 Nor dar'd to love the Virtue of a foe ; 
 
 When, like a lep'rous plague, from the foul head 
 
 To the foul heart her fores Corruption fpread, 
 
 Her iron arm when ftern Oppreilion rear'd, 
 
 And Virtue, from her broad bafe fhaken, fear'd 
 
 The fcourge of Vice ; when, impotent and vain, 
 
 Poor Freedom bow'd the neck to Slavery's chain j 
 
 Is this the Land, where in thofe worn of times, 
 
 The hardy Poet rais'd his honeft rimes 
 
 To dread rebuke, and bade controulment fpeak 
 
 In guilty blumes on the villain's cheek, 
 
 Bade Pow'r turn pale, kept mighty rogues in awe, 
 
 And made them fear the Mufe, who fear'd not Law ? 
 
 How do I laugh, when men of narrow foul.*, 
 Whom folly guides, and prejudice controuls ; 
 XVho, one dull drowfy track of bufinefs trcd, 
 Wormip their Mammon, and neglect their God ; 
 Who, breathing by one mufty fet of rules, 
 Dote from the birth, and are by fyftem fools ; 
 
 Who,
 
 I 7 6 THE AUTHOR. 
 
 Who, form'd to dullnefs from their very youth, 
 
 Lies of the day prefer to Gofpel truth, 
 
 Pick up their little knowledge from Reviews, 
 
 And lay out all their (lock of faith in news ; 
 
 How do I laugh, when Creatures, form'd like thefe, 
 
 Whom Reafon fcorns, and I mould blufh to pleafe, 
 
 Rail at all lib'ral arts, deem verfe a crime, 
 
 And hold not Truth, as Truth, if told in rime ? 
 
 How do I laugh, when PUBLIUS, hoary groan 
 In zeal for SCOTLAND'S welfare, and his own, 
 By flow degrees, and courfe of office, drawn 
 In mood and figure at the helm to yawn, 
 Too mean (the worft of curfes Heav'n can fend) 
 To have a foe, too proud to have a friend, 
 Erring by form, which Blockheads facred hold, 
 Ne'er making new faults, and ne'er mending old, 
 Rebukes my Spirit, bids the daring Mufe 
 Subjedls more equal to her weaknefs chufe ; 
 Bids her frequent the haunts of humble fwains, 
 Nor dare to traffick in ambitious drains j 
 Bids her, indulging the poetic whim 
 In quaint-wrought Ode, or Sonnet pertly trim, 
 
 Alor
 
 T H E A U T H O R. i 77 
 
 Along the Church- way pa:h complain with GRAY, 
 Or dance with MASON on the firft of May ? 
 " All facred is the name and pow'r of Kings, 
 " All States and Statefmen are thofe mighty Things 
 " Which, howfoe'er they out of 'Courfe may roll, 
 v< Were never made for Poets to controul." 
 
 Peace, Peace thou Dotard, nor thus vilely deem 
 Of Sacred Numbers, and their pow'r blafpheme j 
 I tell thee, Wretch, fearch all creation round, 
 In Earth, in Heav'n, no Subject can be found 
 (Our God alone except) above whofe weight 
 The Poet cannot rife, and hold his State. 
 The Hefted Saints above in numbers fpeak 
 The praife of God, tho' there all praife js weak ; 
 In Numbers here below the Bard {hall teach 
 Virtue to foar beyond the Villain's reach ; 
 Shall tear his lab'ring lungs, drain his hoarfe throat, 
 And raife his voice beyond the trumpet's note, 
 Should an afflicted Country, aw'd by men 
 Of flavifh principles, demand his pen. 
 This is a great, a glorious point of view, 
 Fit for an Englifh Poet to purfue, 
 
 VOL, II. Undaunted
 
 i 7 8 THE AUTHOR. 
 
 Undaunted to purfue, tho', in return, 
 
 His writings by the common Hangman burn, 
 
 How do I laugh, when men, by fortune plac'd 
 Above their Betters, and by rank difgrac'd, 
 Who found their pride on titles which they ftain, 
 And, mean themfelves, are of their Fathers vain, 
 Who would a bill of privilege prefer, 
 And treat a Poet like a Creditor, 
 The gen'rous ardor of the Mufe condemn, 
 And curfe the ftorm they know muft break on them. 
 " What, (hail a reptile Bard, a wretch unknown, 
 " Without one badge of merit, but his own, 
 " Great Nobles lam, and Lords, like common men, 
 " Smart from the vengeance of a Scribbler's pen ?" 
 
 What's in this name of Lord, that I mould fear 
 To bring their vices to the public ear ? 
 Plows not the honeft blood of humble fwains 
 Quick as the tide which fwells a Monarch's veins ? 
 Monarchs, who wealth and titles can beftow, 
 Cannot make Virtues in fucceffion flow. 
 Would'ft tliou, proud Man, be fafcly plac'd above 
 The ccnfure of the Mufe, deferve her love, 
 
 Act
 
 THE AUTHOR. 179 
 
 Acl as thy Birth demands, as Nobles ought ; 
 
 Look back, and by thy worthy Father taught, 
 
 Who earnd thofe Honours, thoti wert lorn to wear, 
 
 Follow his fteps, and be his Virtue's heir. 
 
 But if, regardlefs of the road to Fame, 
 
 You Mart afide, and tread the paths of Shame, 
 
 If fuch thy life, that mould thy Sire arife, 
 
 The fight of fuch a Son would blaft his eyes, 
 
 Would make him curfe the hour which gave thee birth, 
 
 Would drive him, mudd'ring, from the fice of earth 
 
 Once more, with mame and forrow, 'mongft the dead 
 
 In ehdlefs night to hide his rev'rend head ; 
 
 If fuch thy life, tho' Kings had made thee more 
 
 Than ever King a fcoundrel made before, 
 
 Na'y, to allow thy pride a deeper fpring, 
 
 Tho' God in vengeance had made thee a King, 
 
 Taking on Virtue's wing her daring flight, 
 
 The Mufe mould drag thee trembling to the light, 
 
 Probe thy foul wounds, and lay thy bofom bare 
 
 To the keen queftion of the fearching air. 
 
 Gods ! with what pride I fee the titled (lave, 
 Who fmarts beneath the ftroke which Satire gave, 
 
 N 2 Aiming
 
 i8o THE AUTHOR. 
 
 Aiming at cafe, and with diftioneft art, 
 Striving to hide the feelings of his heart ! 
 How do I laugh, when with affected air, 
 (Scarce able thro' defpite to keep his chair, 
 Whilft on his trembling lip pale anger fpeaks, 
 And the chaf'd blood flies mounting to his cheeks) 
 He talks of Confcience, which good men. fecures 
 From all thofe evil moments guilt endures, 
 And feems to laugh at thofe, who pay regard 
 To the wild ravings of a frantic bard. 
 " SATIRE, whilft: envy and ill-humour fway 
 " The mind of man, muft always make her way ; 
 " Nor to a bofom, with difcretion fraught, 
 " Is all her malice worth a (ingle thought. 
 ** The Wife have not the will, nor Fools the pow'r 
 " To flop her headflrong courfe ; within the hour, 
 ? Left to herfelf, (he dies ; oppofing Strife, 
 " Gives her frelh vigour, and prolongs her life. 
 <c All things her prey, and ev'ry man her aim, 
 * { I can no patent for exemption claim, 
 " Nor would I wifti to flop that harmlefs dart 
 " Which plays around, but cannot wound my heart; 
 " Tho' pointed at myfelf, be SATIRE free ; 
 * To her 'tis pleafure, and no pain to me." 
 
 Diflembling
 
 THE AUTHOR. 181 
 
 DifTembling Wretch ! hence to the Stoic fchool, 
 And there amongft thy breth'ren play the fool, 
 There, unrebuk'd, thefe wild, vain doclrines preach ; 
 Lives there a man, whom SATIRE cannot reach ? 
 Lives there a man, who calmly can ftand by, 
 And fee his confcience ripp'd with fteady eye ? 
 When SATIRE flies abroad on Falfhood's wing, 
 Short is her life, and impotent her m'ng ; 
 But, when to Truth allied, the wound me gives 
 Sinks deep, and to remoteft ages lives. 
 When in the tomb thy pamper'd flefli fhall rot, 
 And e'en by friends thy mem'ry be forgot, 
 Still fhalt thou live, recorded for thy crimes, 
 Live in her page, and ftink. to after-times. 
 
 Haft thou no feeling yet ? Come throw off pride, 
 And own thofe paffions which thou fhalt not hide. 
 
 S , wlio from the moment of his birth, 
 
 Made human nature a reproach on earth, 
 Who never dar'd, nor wifh'd behind to ftay, 
 When Folly, Vice, and Meannefs led the way, 
 Would blufh, mould he be told, by Truth and Wit, 
 Thofe actions, which he blufh'd not to commit ; 
 
 N 3 Men
 
 i$2 THE AUTHOR. 
 
 Men the moft 'infamous are fond of fame, 
 
 And thofe who fear not guilt, yet ftart at mame. 
 
 But whither runs my zeal, whofe rapid force, 
 Turning the brain, bears Reafon from her courfe, 
 Carries me back to times, when Poets, blefs'd 
 With courage, grac'd the ^Science they profefs'd ; 
 When they, in Honour rooted, firmly ftojd 
 The bad to punifh, and reward the good ; 
 When, to a flame by public Virtue wrought, 
 The Foes of Freedom they to juftice brought, 
 And dar'd expofe tliofe Haves who clar'd fupport 
 A Tyrant plan, and call'd themfelves a Court. 
 Ah ! What are Poets now ? .as flavilh thofe 
 Who deal in Verfe, as thofe who deal in Profe. 
 Is there an Author, fearch the Kingdom round, 
 In whom true Worth, and real Spirit's found ? 
 The Slaves of Bookfellers, or (doom'd by Fate 
 To bafcr chains) vile penfioners of State ; 
 Some, dead to fliame, and of thofe fhackles proud 
 Which Honour fcorns, for flav'ry roar aloud,. 
 Others, balf-palfied only, mutes become,. 
 And what.makes SMO.LLETT write, makesJoHNSON dumb. 
 
 Why
 
 THE AUTHOR. j' 
 
 Why turns yon villain pale ? why bends his eye 
 Inward, abafh'd, when MURPHY pafics by ? 
 Doft thou fage MURPHY for a blockhead take, 
 Who wages war with Vice for Virtue's fake ? 
 No, No like other Worldlings^ you will find 
 He mifts his fails, and catches ev'ry wind. 
 His foul the fhock of int'reft can't endure : 
 Give him a penfion then, and fin fecure. 
 
 With laurell'd wreaths the flatt'rer's brows adorn, 
 Bid Virtue crouch, bid Vice exalt her horn, 
 Bid Cowards thrive, put Honefty to flight, 
 MURPHY {hall prove, or try to prove it right. 
 Try, thou State- Juggler, cv'ry paltry art, 
 Ranfack the inmoft clofet of my heart, 
 Swear thour't my Friend ; by that bafe oath make vv.iv 
 Into my bveaft, and flatter to betray ; 
 Or, if thofe tricks are vain, if wholefome doub; 
 Detedts the fraud, and points the Villain out, 
 Bribe thofe who daily at my board are fed, 
 And make them take my life who eat my bread $ 
 On Authors for defence, for praife depend ; 
 Pay him but well, and MURFHY is thy friend.
 
 184. THE AUTHOR. 
 
 He, he fhall ready ftand with venal rimes, 
 To varnifh guilt, ami confecratc thy crimes, 
 To make Corruption in falfe colours ftiine, 
 And damn his own good name, to refeue thine. 
 
 But, if thy niggard hands their gifts whh-hoM, 
 And Vice no longer rains down fltow'rs of gold, 
 ExpecT: no mercy ; fads, well grourrded, teach, 
 MURPHY, if not rewarded, will impeach. 
 What tho' each man of nice and jufter thought, 
 Shunning his fteps, decrees, by Honour taught, 
 He ne'er can be a Friend, who ftoops fo low 
 To be the bafe betrayer of a foe ; 
 What tho', with thine together link'd, his name 
 Muft be with thine tranfmitted clown to fhame, 
 To ev'ry manly feeling callous grown, 
 Rather than not bbft thine, he'll blaft his own. 
 
 To ope the fountain, whence fedition fprings, 
 To (lander Government, and libel Kings, 
 With Freedom's name to ferve a prefmt hour, 
 Tho' born and bred to arbitrary pow'r, 
 To talk of WILLIAM with infidious art, 
 Whilfl a vile STUART'S lurking in his heart, 
 
 And,
 
 T H'E A U T H O R. 1^5- 
 
 And, whilft mean Envy rears her loathfome head, ' 
 
 Flatt'ring the living, to ahufe the dead, 
 
 Where is SHEBBEARE ? O, let not foul reproach, 
 
 Travelling thither in a City Coach, 
 
 The Pill'ry dare to name ; the whole intent 
 
 Of that Parade was Fame, not Punimment, 
 
 And that old, (launch Whig BEARDMORE (landing by 
 
 Can in full Court give that report the lye. 
 
 With rude unnat'ral jargon to fupport, 
 Half Scotch? half EngUjh^ a declining Court, 
 To make moft glaring contraries unite, 
 And prove, beyond difpute, that black is white, 
 To make firm Honour tamely league with Shame, 
 Make Vice and Virtue differ but in name, 
 To prove that Chains and Freedom are but one, 
 That to be fav'd muft mean to be undone, 
 Is there not GUTHRIE ? Who, like him, can call 
 All Oppofites to proof, and conquer all ? 
 He calls forth living waters from the rock ; 
 He calls forth children from the barren ftock ; 
 He, far beyond the fprings of Nature led, 
 Makes Women bring forth after they are dead > 
 
 He,
 
 X 86 T H E A U T HO R, 
 
 He, on a curious, new, and happy plan, 
 In Wedlock's facred bands joins Man to Man ; 
 And, to complete the whole, moft ftrange, but true, 
 By fome rare magic, makes them fruitful too, 
 Whilft from their loins, in the due courfe of years. 
 Flows the rich blood of GUTHRIE'S Englijb Peers, 
 
 Doft thou contrive fome blacker deed of mame, 
 Something which Nature fhudders but to name, 
 Something which makes the Soul of man retreat, 
 And the life-blood run backward to her feat ? 
 Doft thou contrive for forne bafe private end, 
 Some felfifh view, to hang a trufting friend, 
 To lure him on, e'en to his parting breath, 
 And promife life, to work him furer death ? 
 Grown old in villainy, and dead to grace, 
 Hell in his heart, and TYBURNE in his face ; 
 Behold, : a Parfon at thy Elbow ftands, 
 Low'ring damnation, and with open hands 
 Ripe to betray his Saviour for reward ; 
 The Atheift Chaplain of an Atheift Lord. 
 
 Bred to the. Church, and for the gown decreed, 
 'Ere it was known that I fliould learn to read j 
 
 Tho*
 
 THE AUTHOR! 187 
 
 Tho' that was nothing, for my Friends, who knew 
 
 What mighty Dullnefs of itfelf could do, 
 
 Never defign'd me for a working Pried, 
 
 But hop'4, 1 Ihould have been a DEAN at leaft:; 
 
 Condemn'd (like many more, and worthier men, 
 
 To whom I pledge the fervice of my pen), 
 
 Condemn'd (whilft proud, and pamper'd Sons of Lawn, 
 
 Cramm'd to the throat, in lazy plenty yawn) 
 
 In pomp of rev rend btggry to appear, 
 
 To pray, and ftarve on forty pounds a year ; 
 
 My Friends, who never felt the galling load, 
 
 Lament that I forfook the Packhorfe road, 
 
 Whilft Virtue to my conduct witnefs bears 
 
 In throwing off that gown, which FRANCIS wears. 
 
 What .Creature's that, fo very pert and prim ; 
 So very fpll of foppery, and whim ; 
 So gentle, yet fo brifk ; fo wond'rous fweet, 
 So fit to prattle at a Lady's feet, 
 Who looks, as he the Lord's rich vineyard trod, 
 And by his Garb appears a man of God ? 
 Truft not to looks, nor credit outward fliow j 
 The villain lurks beneath die caffo&d Beau ; 
 
 That's
 
 ,88 T H E A U T H O R. 
 
 That's an Informer ; what avails the name ? 
 Suffice it that the wretch from SODOM came. 
 
 His tongue is deadly from his prefence run, 
 Unlefs thy rage would wifh to be undone. 
 No ties can hold him, no affection bind, 
 And Fear alone reftrains his coward mind,; 
 Free him from that, no Monfter is fo fell, 
 Nor is fo fure a blood -hound found in hell. 
 His filken fmiles, his hypocritic air, 
 His meak demeanour, plaufible and fair, 
 Are only worn to pave Fraud's eafier way, 
 And make gull'd Virtue fall a furer prey. 
 Attend his Church his plan of doctrine view- 
 The Preacher is a Chriftian, dull, but true j 
 But when the hallow'd hour of preaching's o'er, 
 That plan of doctrine's never thought of more j 
 CHRIST is laid by neglected on the fhelf, 
 And the vile Prieft is Golpel to himfelf. 
 
 By CLELAND tutor'd, and with BLACOW 
 (BLACOW, whom by a brave refentment led, 
 OXFORD, if OXFORD, had not funk in fame, 
 Ere this, had damn'd to everlafting fhame) 
 
 Their
 
 T H E A U T H O R. 189 
 
 Their fteps he follows, and their crimes partakes, 
 To Virtue loft, to Vice alone he wakes, 
 Moft lufcioufly declaims 'gainft lufcious themes, 
 And, whilft he rails at blafphemy, blafphemes. 
 
 Are thefe the Arts, which Policy fupplies ? 
 Are thefe the fteps, by which grave Churchmen rile ? 
 Forbid it, Heav'n j or, mould it turn out fo> 
 Let me, and mine, continue mean and low. 
 Such be their Arts, wht>m Intereft controuls ; 
 KIDGELL and I have free and honeft fouls. 
 We fcorn Preferment which is gain'd by Sin, 
 And will, tho' poor without, have peace within. 
 
 THE
 
 
 . 

 
 THE 
 
 DUELLIST.
 
 . 
 
 c
 
 THE 
 
 DUELLIST. 
 
 BOOK I. 
 
 rT^HE Clock ftruck twelve, o'er half the globe 
 
 * Darknefs had fpread her pitchy robe ; 
 MORPHEUS, his feet with velvet fhod, 
 Treading as if in fear he trod, 
 Gentle as dews at even -tide, 
 JDiftill'd his poppies far and wide. 
 
 VOL. II. O AMBITION,
 
 I 94 THE DUELLIST. 
 
 AMBITION, who, when waking, dreams 
 Of mighty, but phantaftic, fchemes, 
 Who, when afleep, ne'er knows that reft 
 With which the humbler foul is bleft, 
 Was building caftles in the air, 
 Goodly to look upon and fair, 
 But, on a bad foundation laid, 
 Doom'd at return of morn to fade. 
 
 Pale STUDY, by the taper's light, 
 Wearing away the watch of night, 
 Safreading, but, with o'ercharg'd head, 
 Remember'd nothing that he read. 
 
 Starving 'midft plenty, with a face 
 Which might the Court of Famine grace, 
 Ragged, and filthy to behold, 
 Grey AV'RICE nodded o'er his gold. 
 
 JEALOUSY, his quick eye half-clos'd, 
 With watchings worn, reluctant doz'd, 
 And mean diftruft not quite forgot, 
 Slumber'd as if he flumber'd not. 
 
 Stretch'd
 
 THE DUELLIST. 195 
 
 Stretch'd at his length on the bare ground, 
 His hardy offspring fleeping round, 
 Snor'd reftlefi LABOUR ; by his fide 
 Lay HEALTH, a coarfe, but comely Bride. 
 
 VIR.TUE, without the Doctor's aid, 
 In the foft arms of ileep was laid, 
 Whilft VICE, within the guilty breaft, 
 Could not be phyfic'd into red:. 
 
 Thau Bloody Man! whofe ruffian knife 
 Is drawn againft thy neighbour's life, 
 And never fcruples to defcend 
 Into the bofom of a friend, 
 A firm, faft friend, by vice allied, 
 And to thy/rrrf fervice tied, 
 In whom ten Murders breed no awe, 
 If properly fecur'd from law. 
 Thou Man of Lit/i ! whom pafllon fires 
 To fouleft deeds, whofe hot defires 
 O'er honcft bars with eafe make way, 
 Whilft Idfot Beauty falls a prey, 
 And to indulge thy brutal flame, 
 A LUCRECE muft be brought to fhame, 
 
 O a Who
 
 i 9 6 THE DUELLIST. 
 
 , Who dort, a brave, bold Sinner, bear 
 Rank inceft to the open air, 
 And rapes, full-blown upon thy crown, 
 Enough to weigh a nation down. 
 TJmi Simu/ar-of Lujl ! vain man, 
 Whofe refllefs thoughts ftill form the plan 
 Of guilt, which wither'd to the root, 
 Thy lifelefs nerves can't execute, 
 Whilft in thy marrowlefs, dry bones, 
 Defire without Enjoyment groans. 
 Thou Perjur'd Wretch ! whom Falfliood cl oaths 
 E'n like a garment, who with oaths 
 Doft trifle, as with brokers, meant 
 To ferve thy ev'ry vale intent, 
 In the Day's broad and fearching eye 
 Making God witnefs to a lye, 
 Bhfpherning Heav'n and Earth for pelf, 
 And hanging/r/Wr to fave thyfelf. 
 Thau Son nf Chance ! whpfe glorious foul 
 On the four aces docm'd to roll, 
 Was never yet with Honour caught, 
 Nor on poor Virtue loft one thought, 
 Who doft thy Wife, thy Chidren fet, 
 Thy Al' t upon a finale bet, 
 
 Rifquingv
 
 THE DUELLIST. 197 
 
 Rifquing, the defp'rate {lake to try, 
 
 Here and Hereafter on a die, 
 
 Who, thy own private fortune loft, 
 
 Doft game on at thy Country's coft, 
 
 And, grown expert in Sharping rules, 
 
 Firft fool'd thyfelf, now prey 'ft on fools. 
 
 Thou Noble Gamefter, whole high place 
 
 Gives too much credit to difgrace, 
 
 Who, with the motion of a die, 
 
 Doft make a mighty liland fly, 
 
 The Sums, I mean, of good French gold 
 
 For which a mighty Ifland fold ; 
 
 Who doft betray Intelligence^ 
 
 Abufe the dearejl Confidence^ 
 
 And, private fortune to create, 
 
 Moft falfely play the game of State ; 
 
 Who doft within the Alley fport 
 
 Sums, which might beggar a whole Court, 
 
 And make us Bankrupts all, if CARE, 
 
 With good V/TALDOT, was not there. 
 
 Thou daring Infidel! whom Pride 
 
 And Sin have drawn from Reafon's fide, 
 
 Who, fearing his avengeful rod, 
 
 Doft wifh not to believe a God, 
 
 O 3 Whofc
 
 198 THE D U E L L I S TV 
 
 Whofe Hope is founded on a plan, 
 Which fhould diftracl: the foul of man, 
 And make him curfe his abject birth j 
 Whofe Hope is, once return'd to earth, 
 There to iie down, for worms a feaft, 
 To rot and perifh, like a Beaft ; 
 Who doft, of punimment afraid, 
 And by thy crimes a Coward made, 
 To ev'ry gen'rous foul a Curfe, 
 Than Hell and all her torments worfe, 
 When crawling to thy latter end, 
 Call on deftruction as a friend, 
 Chufing to crumble into duft 
 Rather than rife, tho' rife you muft. 
 Thou Hypocrite ! who doft prophane, 
 And take the Patriot's name in yain, 
 Then moft thy Country's foe, when moft 
 Of Love and Loyalty you boaft ; 
 Who for the filthy love of Gold, 
 Thy Friend, thy King, thy God haft fold, 
 And, mocking the juft claim of Hell, 
 Were bidders found, thyfelf wouldft fell. 
 Ye Villains / of whatever name, 
 Whatever rank, to whom the claim 
 
 Of
 
 THE DUELLIST. 199 
 
 Of Hell is certain, on whofe lids 
 That worm, which never dies, forbids 
 Sweet Sleep to fall, Come and Behold, 
 XVhilft Envy makes your blood run cold, 
 Behold^ by pitilefs Confcience led, 
 So JUSTICE wills, that holy bed, 
 Where PEACE her full dominion keeps, 
 And Innocence with HOLLAND fleeps. 
 
 Bid Terror, porting on the wind, 
 Affray the fpirits of mankind, 
 Bid Earthquakes, heaving for a vent, 
 Rive their concealing continent, 
 And, forcing an untimely birth 
 Thro' the vaft bowels of the earth, 
 Endeavour, in her monftrous womb, 
 At once all Nature to entomb ; 
 Bid all that's horrible and dire, 
 All that man hates and fears, confpire 
 To make night hideous, as they can ; 
 Still is thy Sleep, Thou Virtuous Man, 
 Pure as the Thoughts, which in thy breaft 
 Inhabit, and enfure thy reft j 
 
 O 4 Still
 
 200 THE DUELLIST. 
 
 Still fnall thy AYLIFF, taught, tho' lat, 
 Thy friendly juftice in his fate, 
 Turn'd to a guardian Angel, fpread 
 Sweet dreams of comfort round thy head. 
 
 Dark, was the Night, by Fate decreed 
 For the contrivance of a deed 
 More black than common, which might make 
 This land from her foundations make, 
 Might tear up Freedom from the root, 
 Deftroy a WILKES, and fix a BUTE. 
 
 Deep Horror held her wide domain j 
 The fky in fullen drops of rain 
 Forewept the morn, and thro' the air, 
 Which, op'ning, laid its bofom bare, 
 Loud Thunders roll'd, and Light'ning ftream'd j 
 The Owl at Freedom's window fcream'd, 
 The Screech-Owl, prophet dire, whofe breath 
 Brings ficknefs, and whofe note is death ; 
 The Church- Yard teem'd, and from the tomb, 
 All fad and filent, thro' the gloom, 
 The Ghofts of Men, in former times 
 Whofe Public Virtues were their crimes, 
 
 Indignant
 
 THE DUELLIST. 201 
 
 Indignant ftalk'd ; Sorrow and Rage 
 Blank'd their pale cheek ; in his own age 
 The prop of Freedom, HAMPDEN there 
 Felt after death the gen'rous care ; 
 SIDNEY by grief from Heav'n was kept, 
 And for his brother Patriot wept ; 
 All Friends of LIBERTY, when Fate 
 Prepar'd to ihorten WILKES'S date, 
 Heav'd, deeply hurt, the heart-felt groan, 
 And knew that wound to be their own. 
 
 Hail, LIBERTY ! a glorious word, 
 In other countries fcarcely heard, 
 Or heard but as a thing of courfe, 
 Without or Energy or Force ; 
 Here felt, enjoy'd, ador'd (lie fprings, 
 Far, far beyond the reach of Kings, 
 Frefh blooming from our Mother Earth ; 
 With Pride and Joy (lie owns her birth 
 Deriv'd from us, and in return 
 Bids in our breafts her Genius burn ; 
 Bids us with all thofe bleflings live 
 Which LIBERTY alone can give, 
 
 Or
 
 102 
 
 THE DUELLIST, 
 
 Or nobly with that Spirit die, 
 
 Which makes Death more than Vi&ory. 
 
 Hail thofe Old Patriots, on whofe tongue 
 Perfuafion in the Senate hung, 
 Whilft They the facred Caufe maintain'd ! 
 Hail thofe Old Chiefs, to Honour train'd, 
 Who fpread, when other methods fail'd, 
 War's bloody banner, and prevail'd ! 
 Shall Men like thefe unmention'd fteep 
 Promifcuous with the common heap, 
 And (Gratitude forbid the crime) 
 Te carried down the ftream of Time 
 In Shoals, unnotic'd and forgot, 
 On LETHE'S ftream, like flags, to rot ? 
 No they mall live, and each fair name, 
 Recorded in the book of Fame, 
 Founded on Honour's bafis, faft 
 As the round Earth to ages laft. 
 Some Virtues vanifh with our breath, 
 Virtue like this lives after death. 
 Old Time himfelf, his fcythe thrown by, 
 Himfelf loft in Eternity, 
 
 An
 
 THE DUELLIST. 203 
 
 An everlafting crown (hall twine 
 
 To make a WILKES and SIDNEY join. 
 
 But fhould fome flave-got Villain dare 
 Chains for his Country to prepare, 
 And, by his birth to flav'ry broke, 
 Make her to feel the galling yoke, 
 May he be evermore accurs'd, 
 Amongft bad men be rank'd the worft ; 
 May he be Mill himfelf, and (till 
 Go on in Vice, and perfect 111 ; 
 May his broad crimes each day increafe, 
 'Till he can't Live, nor Die in Peace ; 
 May he be plung'd fo deep in fhame 
 That Satan mayn't endure his name, 
 And hear, fcarce crawling on the earth, 
 His children curfe him for their birth ; 
 May LIBERTY, beyond the grave, 
 Ordain him to be ftill a flave, 
 Grant him what here he rr.oft requires, 
 And damn him with his own defircs ! 
 
 But fliould fome Villain, in fupport 
 And zeal for a dcfpairing Court, 
 
 Placing
 
 204 
 
 THE DUELLIST. 
 
 Placing in Craft his confidence, 
 
 And making Honour a pretence 
 
 To do a deed of dccpeft fhamc, 
 
 Whilft filthy lucre is his aim ; 
 
 Should fuch a Wretch, with fword or knife, 
 
 Contrive to practife 'gainft the life 
 
 Of One, who honour'd thro' the land, 
 
 For Freedom made a glorious ftand, 
 
 Whofe chief, perhaps his only crime, 
 
 Is (if plain Truth at fuch a time 
 
 May dare her fentiments to tell) 
 
 That He his Country loves too well ; 
 
 May He but words are all too weak 
 
 The feelings of my heart to fpeak 
 
 May He O for a noble curfe 
 
 Which might his very marrow pierce 
 
 The general contempt engage, 
 
 And be the MARTIN of his age. 
 
 END OF THE FIRST BOOK* 
 
 THE
 
 THE 
 
 DUELLIST. 
 
 BOOK IT. 
 
 lp\ E E P in the bofom of a wood* 
 * * Out of the road, a Temple flood 
 Antient, and much the woiie for wear, 
 It call'd aloud for quick repair, 
 And, tottering from fide to fide, 
 Menac'd deftraclion far and wide, 
 Nor able feem'd, unlefe made ftrcnger, 
 To hold out four or five years longer. 
 Four hundred pillars, from the ground 
 Rifin^ in order, mofl unfound,
 
 2 o6 THE DUELLIST. 
 
 Some rotten to the heart aloof 
 Seem'd to fupport the tottYing roof, 
 But to infpeclion nearer laid, 
 Inftead of giving wanted aid. 
 
 The Structure, rare and curious, made 
 By Men moft famous in their trade, 
 A work of years, admir'd by all, 
 Was fuffer'd into duft to fall, 
 Or, juft to mak it hang together^ 
 And keep off the effe&s of weather, 
 Was patch'd and patch'd from time to time 
 By wretches, whom it were a crime 
 A crime, which Art would treafon hold, 
 To mention with thofe names of old. 
 
 Builders, who had the pile furvey'd, 
 And thofe not Flitcrofts in their trade, 
 Doubted (the wife hand in a doubt 
 Merely fometimes to hand her out) 
 Whether (like Churches in a brief, 
 Taught wifely to obtain relief 
 Thro' Chancery, who gives her fees 
 To this and other Charities)
 
 THE DUELLIST. 207 
 
 It muft not, in all parts unfound, 
 Be ripp'd, and pull'd down to the ground j 
 Whether (tho' after-ages ne'er 
 Shall raife a building to compare) 
 Art, if they fhould their Art employ, 
 Meant to preferve, might not deftroy. 
 As human bodies, worn away, 
 Batter'd and hafting to decay, 
 Bidding the pow'r of Art defpair, 
 Cannot thofe very medicines bear, 
 Which, and which only can reftore, 
 And make them healthy as before. 
 
 To LIBERTY, whofe gracious fmile 
 Shed peace and plenty o'er the Ifle, 
 Our grateful Anceftors, her plain 
 But faithful Children, rais'd this fane. 
 
 Full in the Front, ftretch'd out in length, 
 Where Nature put forth all her flrength 
 In Spring eternal, lay a plain, 
 Where our brave fathers us'd to train 
 Their Sons to Arms, to teach the Art 
 Of War, and fteel the infant heart. 
 
 L ABC VS-
 
 2 68 THE D -U E L L I S T. 
 
 LABOUR, their hardy nurfe, when young, 
 Their joints had knit, their nerves had fining j 
 ABSTINENCE, foe declar'd to death, 
 Had, from the time they firft drew breath, 
 The belt of doclors, with plain food, 
 Kept pure the channel of their blood ; 
 HEALTH in their cheeks bade colour rife. 
 And GLORY fpurkled in their eyes. 
 
 The inftruments of Hufbandry, 
 As in contempt, were all thrown by, 
 And, flattering a manly pride, 
 War's keener tools their place fupplied. 
 Their arrows to the head they drew ; 
 Swift to the point their javelins flew ; 
 They grafp'd the fword, they ihook the fpear; 
 Their Fathers felt a pleafing fear, 
 And even COURAGE, landing by, 
 Scarcely beheld with fleady eye. 
 Each Stripling, leflbn'd by his Sire, 
 Knew when to clofe, when to retire, 
 When near at hand, when from afar 
 To fight, and was Him r elf a War. 
 
 Their
 
 THE -D U E L L I S T. 209 
 
 Their Wives, their Mothers all around, 
 Carelefs of order, on the ground, 
 Breath'd forth to Heav'n the pious vow s 
 And for a Son's or Huflband's brow, 
 With eager ringers Laurel wove ; 
 Laurel, which in the facred grove, 
 Planted by LIBERTY, they find, 
 The brows of Conquerors tc bind, 
 To give them Pride and Spirits, fit 
 To make a world in arms fubmit. 
 
 What raptures did the bofom fire 
 Of the young, rugged, peafant Sire, 
 When, from the toil of mimic fight, 
 Returning with return of Night, 
 He faw his babe refign the breaft, 
 And, fmiling, ftroke thofe arms in jeft, 
 With which hereafter he (hall make 
 The proudeft heart in GALLIA quake ! 
 
 Gods ! with what joy, what honeft pride, 
 Did each fond, wiming, ruftic Bride, 
 Behold her manly fwain return ! 
 How did her love-fick bofom burn, 
 VOL. II. P Tho'
 
 , THE DUELLIST. 
 
 Tho* on Parades he was not bred, 
 
 Nor wore the livery of red, 
 
 When, Pfeafure height'ning all l>er charms, 
 
 She ftrain'd her Warrior in her arms, 
 
 And begg'd, whifft Love and Glory fire, 
 
 A Son, a Son jtirt like his Sire ! 
 
 Such were the men in former times, 
 Ere Luxury had made our crimes 
 Our bitter Punimment, who bore 
 Their terrors to a foreign more ; 
 Such were the men, who free from dread, 
 By EDWARDS and by HENRIES led, 
 Spread, like a torrent fwell'd with rains, 
 O'er haughty GALLIA'S trembling plains; 
 Such were the Men, when luft of Pow'r, 
 To work him woe, in evil hour 
 Debauch'd tlie Tyrant from thofe ways, 
 On which a King mould found his praife, 
 When ftern OPPRESSION, hand in hand 
 With PRIDE, ftalk'd proudly thro" the land k 
 When weeping JUSTICE was milled 
 From her fair courie, and MERCY dead;. 
 
 Such
 
 THE DUELLIST. 21 r 
 
 Such were the Men, in Virtue ftrong, 
 Who dar'd not fee their Country's wrong, 
 Who left the mattock, and the fpade, 
 And, in the robes of War array'd, 
 In their rough arms, departing, took 
 Their helplefs babes, and with a look 
 Stern and determin'd, fwore to fee 
 Thofe babes no more, or fee them free ; 
 Such were the Men whom Tyrant PRIDE 
 Could never faften to his fide 
 By threats or bribes, who, Freemen born, 
 Chains, tho' of gold, beheld with fcorn ; 
 Who, free from ev'ry fervile awe, 
 Could never be divorc'd from Law, 
 From that broad gen'ral Law, which Senfe 
 Made for the general defence ; 
 Could never yield to partial ties 
 Which from dependant ftations rifej 
 Could never be to Slav'ry led, 
 For PROPERTY was at their head ; 
 Such were the Men in days of yore, 
 Who, call'd by LIBERTY, before 
 Her Temple on the facred green, 
 In martial paftimes oft were feen 
 
 P 2 Now
 
 212 T ftE D U E L L I S T. 
 
 Now feen no longer in their ftead, 
 To lazinefs and vermin bred, 
 A Race who, ftrangers to the caufe 
 Of Freedom, live by other laws, 
 On other motives fight, a prey 
 To intereft, and fiaves for pay. 
 VALOUR, how glorious on a plan 
 Of Honour founded, leads their Van ; 
 DISCRETION, free from taint of fear, 
 Cool, but refolv'd, brings up their rear, 
 DISCRETION, VALOUR'S better half; 
 DEPENDANCE holds the Gen'ral's Staff. 
 
 In plain and home-fpun garb array'd, 
 'Not for vain^fhew, but fervice made, 
 In a green flourishing old age, 
 Not damn'd yet with an Equipage, 
 In rules of Porterage untaught, 
 SIMPLICITY, not worth a groat, 
 For years had kept the Temple door ; 
 Full on his breaft a glafs he wore, 
 Thro' which his bofom open lay 
 To ev'ry one that pafs'd that way.
 
 THE DUEL LI S T. 213 
 
 Now turn'd adrift with humbler face, 
 But prouder heart, his vacant place 
 CORRUPTION fills, and bears the key 5 
 No entrance now without a fee. 
 
 With belly round, and full fat face, 
 Which on the houfe reflected grace, 
 Full of good fare, and honeft glee, 
 The Steward HOSPITALITY, 
 Old WELCOME fmiling by his fide, 
 A good, old Servant, often tried, 
 And faithful found, who kept in view 
 His Lady's fame and int'reft too, 
 Who made each heart with joy rebound, 
 Yet never run her State a-ground, 
 Was turn'd off, or (which word I find 
 Is more in modern ufe) refign'd. 
 
 Half-ftarv'd, half-fhrving other?, bred 
 In beggary, with carrion fed, 
 Detefted, and detefting all, 
 Made up of Avarice and Gall, 
 Boafting great thrift, yet wafting more 
 Than ever Steward did before, 
 
 ? i Succeeded
 
 214 THE DUELLIST. 
 
 Succeeded One^ who, to engage 
 The praife of an exhaufted Age, 
 Aflum'd a name of high degree, 
 And call'd himfelf OECONOMY. 
 
 Within the Temple, full in fight, 
 Where, without ceafmg, day and night, 
 The Workmen toil'd, where LABOUR bar'd 
 His brawny arm, where ART prepar'd, 
 In regular and even rows, 
 Her types, a Printing-Prefs arofe ; 
 Each Workman knew his tafk, and each 
 Was honeft and expert as LEACH. 
 
 Hence LEARNING (truck a deeper root, 
 And SCIENCE brought forth riper fruit ; 
 Hence LOYALTY receiv'd fupport, 
 Even when banifh'd from the Court ; 
 Hence GOVERNMENT gain'd flrength, and hence 
 RELIGION fought, and found defence - y 
 Hence ENGLAND'S faireft fame arofe, 
 And LIBERTY fubdu'd her foes. 
 
 On
 
 THE DUELLIST, 215 
 
 On a low, fimple, turf-made throne 
 Rais'd by Allegiance, fcarcely known 
 From her attendants, glad to be 
 Pattern of that Equality 
 She wifh'd to all, fo far as cou'd 
 Safely confift with focial good, 
 The GODDESS fat ; around her head 
 A chearful radiance GLORY fpread ; 
 COURAGE, a Youth of royal race, 
 Lovelily ftern, poflefs'd a place 
 On her left-hand, and on her right 
 Sat HONOUR, cloath'd with robes of Light j 
 Before herMAGN 7 A CHART A lay, 
 Which fome great Lawyer, of his day 
 The PRATT, was offic'd to explain, 
 And make the bafis of her reign ; 
 PEACE, crown'd with Olive, to her breaft 
 Two fmiling, twin-born infants preft j 
 At her feet couching, WAR was laid, 
 And with a brindled Lion play'd j 
 JUSTICE and MERCY, hand in hand, 
 Joint Guardians of the happy land, 
 Together held their mighty charg-, 
 And TRUTH walk'd aii about at large ; 
 
 P 4 HEALTH
 
 I 
 
 216 THE DUELLIST. 
 
 HEALTH for the royal troop the feaft 
 Prepar'd, and VIRTUE was High Prieft. 
 
 Such was the fame our- Goddefs bore, 
 Her Temple fuch, in days of yore. 
 What changes ruthlefs Time prefents ! 
 Behold her ruin'd battlements, 
 Her walls decay 'd, her nodding fpires, 
 Her altars broke, her dying fires, 
 Her name defpis'd, her Priefts deftroy'd, 
 Her friends difgrac'd, her foes employ'd, 
 Her/elf (by MinifletiatArts 
 Depriv'd e'en of the people's hearts, 
 Whilft They, to work her furer woe, 
 Feign her to Monarchy a foe) 
 Exil'd by grief^ felf-doom'd to dwell 
 With fome poor Hermit in a cell, 
 Or, that retirement tedious grown, 
 If me walks forth, fhe walks unknown, 
 Hooted, and pointed at with fcorn, 
 As One in fome ftrange Country born. 
 
 Behold a rude and ruffian race, 
 A band of fpoilers, feize her place ; 
 
 With
 
 T H E D U E L L I S T. '217 
 
 With looks, which might the heart dif-feat, 
 And make life found a quick retreat, 
 To rapine from the cradle bred, 
 A Staunch, Old Blood-bound at their head, 
 Who, free from Virtue and from Awe, 
 Knew none but the bad part of Law, 
 They rov'd at large ; each on his breaft 
 Mark'd with a Grey-hound^ flood confeft. 
 CONTROULMENT waited on their nod 
 High-weilding PERSECUTION'S rod, 
 CONFUSION follow'd at their heels, 
 And a cajl Statefman held the Seals, 
 Thofe Seals, for which he dear mall pay, 
 Whe.n awful JUSTICE takes her day, 
 
 The Printers faw they faw and fled 
 SCIENCE, declining, hung her head, 
 PROPERTY in defpair appear'd, 
 And for herfelf deltruclion fear'd ; 
 Whilft, under-foot, the rude flaves trod 
 The works of men, and word of God, 
 Whilft, clofe behind, on many a book, 
 in which he never deigns to look, 
 
 Which
 
 THE DUELLIST. 
 
 Which he did not, nay could not read, 
 A 'bold* bad man (by pow'r decreed 
 For that bad end, who in the dark 
 Scorn'd to do mifchief ) fet his mark 
 In the full day, the mark of Hell, 
 And on die Gofpel ftamp'd an L. 
 
 LIBERTY fled, her Friends withdrew, 
 Her Friends, a faithful, chofen few ; 
 HONOUR in grief threw up, and SHAME, 
 Cloathing herfelf with HONOUR'S name, 
 Ufurp'd his ftation j on the throne, 
 Which LIBERTY once call'd her own, 
 (Gods, that fuch mighty ills mould fpring, 
 Under fo great, fo good a King, 
 So Lov'd, fo Loving, thro' the arts 
 Of Statefmen, curs'd with wicked hearts \) 
 For ev'ry darker purpofe fit, 
 Behold in triumph STATE-CRAFT fit. 
 
 END OF THE SECOND BOOK. 
 
 THE
 
 THE 
 
 DUELLIST. 
 
 BOOK III. 
 
 A H me ! what mighty perils wait, 
 ** The man who meddles with a State, 
 Whether to ftrengthen, or oppofe ! 
 Falfe are his friends, and firm his foes. 
 How muft his Soul, once ventur'd in, 
 Plunge blindly en from fin to fin ! 
 What toils he fuffers, what difgrace, 
 To get, and then to keep a place ! 
 How often, whether wrong or right, 
 Muft he in jeft or earneft fight, 
 Rifquing for thofe both life and limb, 
 Who would not rifque one groat for him ! 
 
 Under
 
 -a.20 THE D U E L L 1ST. .: 
 
 -.,; ._. ..Under the Temple lay a Cave; 
 Made by fome guilty, coward flave, 
 Whofe aftions fear'd rebuke, a maze 
 Of intricate and winding ways, 
 Not to be found without a clue ; 
 One Pafla;e only, known to few. 
 
 s . ]> . , .... ; 
 
 In paths direct led to a Cell, 
 
 * * - -^ -A. V &. , Ik' mm ' V , , 4^ V.-j' . *W.^ 
 
 Where FRAUD in fecret lov'd to dwell, 
 With all her tools and Haves about her, 
 Nor fear'd left HONESTY fliould rout her. 
 
 In a dark corner, fhunning fight 
 Of Man, and ihrinking from the light, 
 One dull, dim taper thro' the Cell 
 Glimm'ring, to make more horrible 
 The face of darknefs, (lie prepares, 
 Working unfeen, all kinds of fnares > 
 With curious, but deftruclive art ; 
 Herf, thro' the eye to catch the heart, 
 Gay Stars their tinfei beams afford, 
 Neat artifice to trap a Lord - t 
 T'bere, fit for all \vhom Folly bred, 
 Wave Plurnes of Fcathsri for the h.ad j 
 
 Garters
 
 cT H E " D U E L L 1 S T. -225 
 
 Carters the Hag -contrives to make, 
 Which, as it ieeras, a babe might break, 
 But which ambitious Madmen feel 
 More firm and fare than chains of fteel ; 
 Which, flipp'd juft underneath the knee, 
 Forbid a Freeman to be free. 
 Purfes me knew (did ever curfe 
 Travel more fure than in a purfe?) 
 Which, by fome ftrange and magic bands 
 Enclave the foul, and tie the hands. 
 
 Here FLATT'RY, eldeft born of -GuiLE, 
 Weaves with rare (kill the filken fmile, 
 The courtly cringe, the fuppie bow, 
 The private fqueeze, the Levee vow, 
 With which, no ftrange or recent cafe, 
 Fools in deceive Fools -out of place, 
 
 CORRUPTION (who, in fcrmer'times, 
 Thro' fear or ftiame conceal'd her crime-., 
 And what flie did, contriv'd to do it 
 So that the Public might not view it) 
 Profumptuous grown, unfit was held 
 For their dark councils, and expeli'd, 
 
 Since
 
 222 THE DUELLIST. 
 
 Since in the day her bufmefs might 
 Be done as fafe as in the night. 
 
 Her eye down-bending to the ground, 
 Planning fome dark and deadly wound, 
 Holding a dagger, on which ftood, 
 All frefh and reeking, drops of blood, 
 Bearing a lanthorn, which of yore, 
 By TREASON borrow'd, GUY FAWKES bore, 
 By which, fince they improv'd in trade, 
 Exctfemen have their lanthorns made, 
 ASSASSINATION, her whole mind, 
 Blood-thirfting, on her arm reclin'd. 
 DEATH, grinning, at her elbow ftood, 
 And held forth inftruments of blood, 
 Vile inftruments, which cowards chufe, 
 But Men of Honour dare not ufe ; 
 Around his Lordlhip and his Grace, 
 Both qualified for fuch a place, 
 With many a FORBES, and many a DUN, 
 Each a refolv'd, and pious Son, 
 Wait her high bidding'; Each prepar'd 
 As (he around her orders fhar'd, 
 
 Proof
 
 THE DUELLIST. 223 
 
 Proof 'gainft remorfe, to run, to fly, 
 And bid the deftin'd vi&im die, 
 Porting on Villainy's black" wing, 
 Whether He Patriot is, or King. 
 
 OPPRESSION, willing to appear 
 An objecl: of our love, not fear, 
 Or at the mod a rev 'rend awe 
 To breed, ufurp'd the garb of LAW. 
 A Book me held, on which her eyes 
 Were deeply fix'd, whence feem'd to rife 
 Joy in her breaft ; a Book, of might 
 Moft wonderful, which black to white 
 Could turn, and without help of laws, 
 Could make the worfe the better caufe. 
 She read, by flatt'ring hopes deceiv'd, 
 She wUh'd, and what me wifh'd, believ'd, 
 To make that Book for ever ftand 
 The rule of wrong through all the land ; 
 On the back, fair and worthy note, 
 At large was MACNA CHARTA wrote, 
 But turn your eye within, and read, 
 A bitter leflbn, N 's CREED. 
 
 Ready,
 
 224- THE D U E. L L 1ST, 
 
 Ready, e'en with a look, to run, 
 Faft as the courfers of the Sun, 
 To worry Virtue^ at her hand 
 Two half-ftarv'd. ^Greyhounds took their (land. 
 A curious model, cut in wood, 
 Of a moft antient Caftle flood 
 Full in her view ; the. gates were barr'd, 
 And Soldiers on the watch kept guard j 
 In the front, openly, in black 
 Was wrote, The TOW'R, but on the back v 
 Mark'd with a Secretary's feal, 
 In bloody Letters, The B AS TILE. 
 . 
 
 Around a Table, fully bent 
 On mifchief of raoft black intent 
 Deeply detetmin'd, that their reign 
 Might longer laft, to work the bane 
 Of one firm Patriot, whofe .heart, tied 
 To Honpur., all their pow'r defied, 
 And brought thofe actions into light 
 They wiuY.d.to have conceal'd in Night. 
 Begot, Born, Bred to infamy, 
 A Privy-Council fat of. THREE ; 
 
 Great
 
 THE DUELLIST. 225 
 
 Great were their names, of high repute 
 And favour thro' the land of BUTE. 
 
 The FIRST (entitled to the place 
 Of Honour both by Gown and Grace, 
 Who never let occafion flip 
 To take right hand of fellowfliip, 
 And was fo proud, that fhould he meet' 
 The twelve Apoftles in the ftreet, 
 He'd turn his nofe up at them all, 
 And move his Saviour from the wall ; 
 Who was fo mean (Meannefs and Pride 
 Still go together fide by fide) 
 That he would cringe, and creep, be civil, 
 And hold a ftirrup for the Devil, 
 If in a journey to his mind, 
 He'd let him mount, and ride behind ; 
 Who bafely fawn'd thro' all his life, 
 For Patrons firft, then for a Wife. 
 Wrote Dedications which muft make 
 The heart of ev'ry Chriftian quake ; 
 Made one Man equal to, or more 
 Than God, then left him, as before 
 
 VOL. II, Q, His
 
 22 6 THE DUELLIST. 
 
 His God he left, and drawn by 'Pride, 
 
 Shifted about to t'other fide) 
 
 Was by his fire a Parfon m ide, 
 
 Merely to give the Boy a trade ; 
 
 But he himfelf was thereto drawn 
 
 By fome faint omens of the Lawn, 
 
 And on the truly Chriftian plan 
 
 To make himfelf a Gentleman, 
 
 A title, in which form array'd him, 
 
 Tho' Fate ne'er thought on't when (he made him. 
 
 The Oaths he took, 'tis very true, 
 But took them, as all wife men do, 
 With an intent, if things mould turn, 
 Rather to temporize, than burn. 
 Gofpel and Loyalty were made 
 To ferve the purpofes of trade j 
 Religion's are but paper ties, 
 Which bind the fool, but which the wife, 
 Such idle notions far above, 
 Draw on and off, juft like a glove ; 
 All Gods, all Kings (let his great aim 
 Be anfwer'd), were to him the fame.
 
 THE DUELLIST. 227 
 
 A Curate firft, he read and read, 
 And laid in, whilft he fhould have fed 
 The fouls of his neglected flock, 
 Of reading fuch a mighty flock., 
 That he o'ercharg'd the weary brain 
 With more than me could well contain, 
 More than me was with Spirits fraught 
 To turn, and methodize to Thought, 
 And which, like ill-digefkd food, 
 To humours turn'd, and not to blood. 
 Brought up to London, from the plow 
 And Pulpit, how to make a bow 
 He try'd to learn, he grew polite, 
 And was the Poet's Parafite. 
 With Wits converfing (and Wits then 
 Were to be found 'mongft Noblemen) 
 He caught, or would h:.ve caught the flame, 
 And would be nothing, or the fame ; 
 He drank with Drunkards, liv'd with Sinners, 
 Herded with Infidels for dinners, 
 With fuch an Emphaiis and Grace 
 Blafphem'd, that POTTER kept not pace ; 
 He, in the higheft reign of noon, 
 Bawl'd bawdry fongs to a Pfalm Tune, 
 
 Q 2 Liv'd
 
 228 THE DUELLIST. 
 
 Liv'd with Men infamous and vile, 
 Truck'd his falvation for a fmile, 
 To catch their humour caught their plan, 
 And laugh'd at God to laugh with Man, 
 Prais'd them, when living, in each breath, 
 And damn'd their mem'ries after death. 
 
 To prove his Faith, which all admit 
 Is at lead equal to his Wit, 
 And make himfelf a Man of note, 
 He in defence of Scripture wrote ; 
 So long he wrote, and long about it, 
 That e'en Believers 'gan to doubt it j 
 He wrote too of the Inward Light, 
 Tho' no one knew how he came by't, 
 And of that influencing Grace, 
 Which in his life ne'er found a place ; 
 He wrote too of the Holy Ghoft, 
 Of whom, no more than doth a poft 
 He knew, nor, mould an Angel mew him, 
 Would He or know, or chufe to know him. 
 
 Next (for he knew 'twixt ev'ry Science 
 There was a natural alliance) 
 
 He
 
 THE DUELLIST. 229 
 
 He wrote, t* advance his Maker's praife, 
 Comments on rimes, and notes on plays, 
 And with an all-fufficient air 
 Plac'd himfelf in the Critic's chair, 
 Ufurp'd o'er Reafon full dominion, 
 And govern'd merely by opinion. 
 At length dethron'd, and kept in awe 
 By one plain fimple Man of Law, 
 He arm'd dead Friends, to Vengeance true, 
 T" abufe the Man they never knew. 
 
 Examine ftriclly all mankind, 
 Moft Characters are mix'd we, find, 
 And Vice and Virtue take their turn 
 In the fame breajft to beat and burn. 
 Our Prieft was an exception here, 
 Nor did one fpark of Grace appear, 
 Not one dull, dim fpark in his foul ; 
 Vice, glorious Vice pofiefs'd the whole, 
 And, in her fervice truly warm, 
 He was in fin moft uniform. 
 
 Injurious Satire^ own at leaft 
 One 'fniveling Virtue in the Prkft a 
 
 One
 
 2 3 
 
 THE D U E L L I S T, 
 
 One fniveling Virtue which is plac'd, 
 They fay, in or about the waift, 
 Call'd CHASTITY ; the Prudifh Dame 
 Knows it at large by Virtue's name. 
 To this his Wife (and in thefe days 
 Wives feldom without reafon praife) 
 Bears evidence then calls her child, 
 And fwears that TOM was vafily wild. 
 
 Ripen'd by a long courfe of years, 
 He great and perfect now appears. 
 In fnape fcarce of the human kind ; 
 A Man, without a manly mind j 
 No huiband, tho' he's truly wed ; 
 Tho' on his knees a child is bred, 
 No Father ; injur'd, without end 
 A Foe ; and, tho' oblig'd, no Friend ; 
 A Heart, which Virtue ne'er difgrac'd j 
 A Head, where Learning runs to wafte ; 
 A Gentleman well-bred, if breeding 
 Refts in the article of reading ; 
 A Man of this World, for the next 
 Was ne'er included in his text ;
 
 THE DUELLIST. 231 
 
 A Judge of Genius, th/ confeft 
 With not one fpark of Genius bleft \ 
 Amongft the flrft of Critics plac'd, 
 Thp free from ev'ry taint of Tafte ; 
 A Chriftian without faith or works, 
 As he would be a Turk 'mongft Turks ; 
 A great Divine, as Lords agree, 
 Without the lead Divinity ; 
 To crown all, in declining age, 
 Enflam'd with Church and Party- rage, 
 Behold him, full and perfeft quite, 
 A falfe Saint, and true Hypocrite. 
 
 Next fat a Lawyer, often try'd 
 In perilous extremes ; when Pride 
 And Pow'r, all \vild and trembling, flood, 
 Nor dar'd to tempt the raging flood ; 
 This bold, bad Man arofe to view, 
 And ga\e his hand to help them through, 
 Steel'd 'gainft Compafuon, as they paft, 
 He faw poor Freedom breathe her laft, 
 He faw h^r ftruggle, heard her groan, 
 He faw her helplefs and alone,
 
 232 THE DUELLIST. 
 
 Whehn'd in that florm, which, fear'd and prais'd 
 By fhves lefs bold, himfelf had rais'd, 
 
 Bred to the Law, he from the firft 
 Of all bad Lawyers was the wcrft. 
 Perfe&ion (for bad men maintain 
 In ill we may perfection gain) 
 In others is a work of time, 
 And they creep on from crime to crime, 
 He, for a Prodigy defign'd 
 To fpread amazement o'er mankind, 
 Started full ripen'd all at once 
 A Perfect Knave, and Perfect Dunce. 
 
 Who will for him may boaft of Senfe, 
 His better guard is Impudence. 
 His front, with ten-fold plates of brafs 
 Secur'd, SHAME never yet could pafs, 
 Nor on the furface of his fkin, 
 Blum for that guilt which dwelt within. 
 How often, in contempt of* Laws, 
 To found the bottom of a caufe, 
 To fearch out ev'ry rotten part, 
 And worm into its very heart, 
 
 Hath
 
 THE DUELLIST. 233 
 
 Hath he ta'en briefs on falfe pretence, 
 
 And undertaken the defence 
 
 Of trufting Fools, whom in the end 
 
 He meant to ruin, not defend ? 
 
 How often, e'en in open Court, 
 
 Hath the wretch made his fhame his fport, 
 
 And laugh'd off, with a Villain's eafe, 
 
 Throwing up briefs, and keeping fees ? 
 
 Such things, as, tho' to roguery bred, 
 
 Had ftruck a little Villain dead. 
 
 Caufes, whatever their import, 
 He undertakes, to ferve a Court ; 
 For he by heart this rule had got, 
 Pow'r can effect, what Law cannot. 
 
 Fools he forgives, but rogues he fears j 
 If Genius, yok'd with Worth, appears, 
 His weak foul fickens at the fight, 
 And ftrives to plunge them down in night. 
 
 So loud he talks, fo very loud, 
 He is an Angel with the crowd, 
 Whilft he makes Juftice hang her head, 
 And Judges turn from pale to red. Bid
 
 234 THE D' U E L L I S T. 
 
 Bid all that Nature, on a plan 
 Moft intimate, makes dear to Man, 
 All that with grand and gen'ral ties 
 Binds good and bad, the Fool and Wife, 
 Knock at his Heart ; They knock in vain, 
 No entrance there fuch Suitors gain. 
 Bid kneeling Kings forfake the throne ; 
 Bid at his feet his Country groan ; 
 Bid Liberty ftretch out her hands j 
 Religion plead her ftronger bands j 
 Bid Parents, Children, Wife, and Friends ; 
 If they come thwart his private ends, 
 Unmov'd he hears the gen'ral call, 
 And bravely tramples on them all. 
 
 Who will, for him, may cant and whine, 
 And let weak Confcience with her line 
 Chalk out their ways ; fuch ftarving rules 
 Are only fit for coward fools, 
 Fellows who credit what Priefts tell, 
 And tremble at the thoughts of Hell ; 
 His Spirit dares contend with Grace, 
 And meets Damnation face to face. 
 
 Such
 
 THE DUELLIST. 235 
 
 Such was our Lawyer; by his fide 
 In all bad qualities allied, 
 In all bad Counfels, fat a Tblr^ 
 By birth a Lord ; O facred word ! 
 O word moft facred, whence Men get 
 A Priviledge to run in debt, 
 Whence They at large exemption claim 
 From Satire, and her fervant Shame ; 
 Whence They, depriv'd of all her force, 
 Forbid bold Truth to hold her courfe. 
 
 Confult his perfon, drefs, and air, 
 He feems, which Grangers well might fvvear, 
 The Mafter, or by Courtejy, 
 The Captain of a Colliery. 
 Look at his vifage, and agree 
 Half-Hang'd he feems, juft from the Tree 
 Efcap'd ; a Rope may fometimes break, 
 Or Men be cut down by miftake. 
 
 He hath not Virtue, (in the fchool 
 Of Vice bred up) to live by rule, 
 Nor hath he Senfe (which none can doubt 
 Who know the Man) to live without. 
 
 His
 
 236 THE DUELLIST. 
 
 His life is a continu'd fcene 
 
 Of all that's infamous and mean ; 
 
 He knows not change, unlefs, grown nice 
 
 And delicate, from vice to vice ; 
 
 Nature, defign'd him, in a rage, 
 
 To be the WHARTON of his age, 
 
 But, having giv'n all the Sin, 
 
 Forgot to put the Virtues in. 
 
 To run a horfe, to make a match, 
 
 To revel deep, to roar a catch, 
 
 To knock a tott'ring watchman down, 
 
 To fweat a woman of the Town, 
 
 By fits to keep the Peace, or break it, 
 
 In turn to give a Pox, or take it, 
 
 He is, in faith, moft excellent, 
 
 And in the Word's moft full intent, 
 
 A true Choice Spirit we admit ; 
 
 With Wits a Fool, with Fools a Wit ; 
 
 Hear "him but talk, and You would fwear 
 
 OBSCENITY herfelf was there; 
 
 And that PROPHANENESS had made choice, 
 
 By way of Trump, to ufe his Voice ; 
 
 That, in all mean and low things great, 
 
 He had been bred at BiHingfgate, 
 
 And
 
 THE DUELLIST. 237 
 
 And that, afcending to the earth 
 
 Before the feafon of his birth, 
 
 BLASPHEMY, making way and room, 
 
 Had mark'd him in his Mother's womb - } 
 
 Too honeft (for the worft of men 
 
 In forms are honeft now and then) 
 
 Not to have, in the ufual way, 
 
 His Bills fent in ; Too great, to pay ; 
 
 Too proud to fpeak to, if he meets, 
 
 The honeft Tradefman whom he cheats ; 
 
 Too infamous to have a friend, 
 
 Too bad for bad men to commend, 
 
 Or Good to name ; beneath whofe weight 
 
 Earth groans ; who hath been fpar'd by Fate 
 
 Only to fhew, on Mercy's plan, 
 
 How far and long God bears with Man. 
 
 Such were the THREE, who, mocking deep, 
 At Midnight fat, in Counfel deep, 
 Plotting deftruction 'gainft a head, 
 Whofe Wifdom could not be mifled ; 
 Plotting deftrudtion 'gainft a heart, 
 Which ne'er from honour would depart.
 
 2 3 S THE DUELLIST. 
 
 " Is He not rank'd amongft our foes ? 
 
 " Hath not his Spirit dar'd oppofe 
 
 " Our deareft meafures, made our name 
 
 " Stand forward on the roll of Shame ? 
 
 *' Hath he not won the vulgar tribes, 
 
 44 By fcorning menaces and bribes, 
 
 ' And proving, that his darling caufe, 
 
 44 Is of their Liberties and Laws 
 
 44 To ftand the Champion ? in a word, 
 
 44 Nor need one argument be heard 
 
 " Beyond this, to awake our zeal, 
 
 *' To quicken our refolves, and fteel 
 
 " Our fteady fouls to bloody berit, 
 
 44 (Sure ruin to each dear intent, 
 
 44 Each flatt'ring hope) He, without fear, 
 
 44 Hath dar'd to make the Truth appear." 
 
 They faid, and, by refentment taught, 
 Each on revenge employ'd his thought, 
 Each, bent on mifchief, rack'd his brain 
 To her full ft retch, but rack'd in vain ; 
 Scheme after Scheme they brought to viewj 
 All were examined, none would do. 
 
 When
 
 THE DUELLIST. 239 
 
 When FRAUD, with pleafure in her face, 
 
 Forth iffued from her hiding place, 
 
 And at the table where they meet, 
 
 Firft having bleft them, took her feat. 
 
 " No trifling caufe, my darling Boys, 
 
 tc Your prefent thoughts and cares employs ; 
 
 " No common fnare, no random blow 
 
 <c Can work the bane of fuch a Foe, 
 
 " By Nature cautious as he's brave, 
 
 " To Honour only he's a flave j 
 
 " In that weak part without defence, 
 
 " We muft to Honour make pretence j 
 
 " That Lure (hall to his ruin draw 
 
 " The Wretch, who ftands fecure in Law. 
 
 " Nor think that I have idly plann'd 
 
 " This full-ripe fcheme ; behold at hand, 
 
 *' With three months training on his head, 
 
 " An Inftrument, whom I have bred, 
 
 " Born of thefe bowels, far from fight 
 
 " Of Virtue's falfe, but glaring Light, 
 
 " My youngefl Born, my deareft Joy, 
 
 " Moft like myfelf, my darling Boy. 
 
 " He, never touch'd with vile remorfe, 
 
 4< Refolv'd and crafty in his courfe, 
 
 " Shall
 
 2 4 o THE DUELLIST* 
 
 " Shall work our ends, complete our /themes, 
 " Moft Mine^ when mofl he Honour's feems j 
 " Nor can be found, at home, abroad, 
 " So firm and full a ilave of FRAUD." 
 
 She faid, and from each envious Son 
 A difcontented murmur run 
 Around the Table j All in place 
 Thought his full praife their own difgrace, 
 Wond'ring what Stranger She had got, 
 Who had one vice that they had not. 
 When (Irak the portals open flew, 
 And, clad in armour, to their view 
 
 M , the DueUift, came forth ; 
 
 All knew, and all confeft his worth, 
 
 All juflified, with fmiles array'd, 
 
 The happy choice their Dam had made. 
 
 END OF THE DUELLIST; 
 
 AND 
 
 THE SECOND VOLUME.
 
 </<K<.*&/ Soues^&flo-t^* -c**^a
 
 UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA AT LOS ANGELES 
 
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