y) 1 8 1 ^=g .TOF'T -"OTCOT rp-u- --- T, TOUR ^^i' FACiL/TY This book is DUE on the last date stamped below UjNIVERSITY of CALIFORInFIA AT LOS ANGELES LIBRARY r1 » THE OYAL TOUR AND WEYiMOUTH AMUSExMENTS ; A SOLEMN AND REPRIMANDING EPISTLE TO THE LAUREAT. PITT'S FLIGHT to WIMBLEDON; an ODE. An ode to the FRENCH. ODE TO THE CHARITY MILL in WINDSOR-PAPJC A HINT TO A POOR DEMOCRAT. ODE TO THE QUEEN'S ELEPHANT. The SORROWS of SUNDAY; an ELEGY. Y PETE^ PINDAR, Escu y^m'e CiESARis Invidl res dlcere. HoRACE« Shame on th^e, Pye 1 to C^sar tune the firing ; Berhyme his route, and Weymouth wonders fing : Saddle thy Pegasus at once — ride pofi : Lo, ere thou flart'ft, a thoufand things are loji I A NEW EDITION. LONDON: PRINTED FOR J. WALKER, PATERNOSTER-ROW j J.BELL, OXFORD-STREET J J. LADLEY, MOUNT-STREET, BERKELEY-SQUARE; AND E. JEFFREY, FALL-MALL, t/L Dcc. xcr, 92325 To J. PYE, Esq. Sir,' I Allow you virtues, I allow you literary talents; but I will not fubfcribe to your indolence : one little folitary annual Ode is not fufficient for a Great King. Whatever thincrs are done, whatever things SLVcJaidy nay, whatever things are conceived by mighty Potentates, is treafure for the page of History. Blufh, my friend, that a volunteer Bard fliould run off with the merit of recording the wonderful adlions and fapient fayings of Royalty ! As fooa as the Mill of Charity was ereded in Windsor Park, Lo ! at the deed, the Muse caught fire, And fweird, with praife, the facred Lyre, Sweet Lass ! (he could not for her foul fit ftilL Imagination, on the watch, Gp'd, for the fwelling flood, the hatch ; And, lo ! to work, alertly, went her milh A As ( vl ) As foon as the Royal Journey to Weymouth was an- nounced, the fame Loyal Muse Turn'd her brain's pockets infide out. For poetry, to pralfe the rout. No fooner was the noble Elephant from Arcot prefented to onjr beloved Queen, and moft economically and moll: et no man fay I hate our Kings and Queens, Princes and Drawing-Rooms, and Levee-Scenes ; Defpife the bows and curtfies, whifper'd talk ? I love the mummry from my very foul : Daily I fpread its fame from pole to pole — What glorious quarry for the Muse's hawki Afk if the Man whofe heart the chafe adores, Wiflies annihilation to wild boars, Or ( viii ) Or wolves fo hungry. — '' No," the Sport s^f an cries— -^ ^^ Long live wild boars and wolves ! God blefs their eyes!'*' May Kings cxijl — and Trifle pig with Kings ! The Muse defireth not more precious things — Such fweet 7nock-gra7ideur ! — fo fuUimely garijlo / Let's have no Washingtons : dixdifuch appear, The Muse and I had ev'ry thing to fear — Soon forc'd to afk a pittance of the pariflio Such want no praife — in native virtue ftrong o- ^Tisfolly^ folly y feeds the Poet's fong*-- THE ROYAL TOUR^ O R, WE r M U T H AMUSEMENTS, PROEMIUM. VTreat Is of Hair-powder the fale — DuNDAs and Pitt have both turn'd pale ; Yet Courtiers cry aloud its want of merit. Courtiers have try'd with all their fpite To fink it in Oblivion's night — ^ My Friend, the Public, keeps it up with (piritr Hair-powder the/ale}. My ingenious Poem fo called ; not Mr. Pitt's iftge^ nious Tax on that fubjed, which, we are well informed, fuccecds as miferably in produce, as reputation, B How ( 2 ) How often we have feen a bullying Cloud Attack the Sun, and quarrel too aloud ^ Spit, thunder, lighten, frighten the two poles, Blocking up ev'ry avenue for peeping ; ra On this fide now, and now on that lide creeping 5, A fort of dirty malkin flopping holes ! Sometimes the worried glorious God of Day hiftfis upon a view, and (hows an eye ; Tuft as a Manager, when fome fad Play ^^ Is taken ill, and very like to die, Kens through the curtain on the Critic Nation, All hifling, clatt'ring, howling out damnation^ Thus Envy, the vile hag, attacks my rhymes, Swearing they ihall not peep on diftant Times ; 2c 5 But ( 3 ) But violent indeed will be the tuffel : I deem myfelf, indeed, a tuneful whale : She fwears I'm not upon fo large a fcale ; Rather a wrinkle, limpet, paltr)^ muffel, Clinging to heavy rocks, or wooden things, 25 Meaning my loyalty, perchance^ to Kings. The Public feems to like my Brats, Begot, indeed, with little pain — Whether it turbot gives, or fprats, Behold another to maintain ! - 30 Thus, then, I caft it on that Sea the Town : If true^ ix.fwims ; iifpuriouSy let it drown,^ ROYAL ( 4 ) ROYAL TOUR, Oee ! CiESAR*s off! the duft around him hovers. And, gathering, lo, the King of Glory covers ! The royal hubbub fills both eye and ear, 35 And vvide-mouth'd Wonder marks the wild career. How like his golden Brother of the (ky, When Nature thunders, and the ftorm is high ; Now in, now out of clouds, behind, before, He rolls amid the elemental roar. 40 Heav'ns ! with what ardour through the lanes he drives. The country trembling for its tenants lives ! Squat on his fpcckled haunches gapes the toad, And frogs affrighted hop along the road ; The ( 5 ) The hares a{lohifli*d to their terrors yield, 45 Cock their long ears, and feud from field to field ; The owl, loud hooting, from his ivy ruflies ; And fparrows, chatt'ring, flutter from the buflies : Old women, (calFd *' a pack of blinking b s,") Dafh'd by the thundering Light horse into ditches^ 50 Scrambling and howling, with pofl:™rs pointed. Sad pidure ! plump againft the Lord's Anointed* Dogs bark, pigs grunt, the flying turkeys gobble 5 Fowls cackle; fcreaming geefe, with ftretch'd wing, hobble; Dire death his horftrs hoofs to ducklings deal, 5 5 And goflings gafp beneath the burning wheel. Thus the great iEoL, when he rufles forth, With ail his winds, East, West, and South, and North; Flutter the leaves of trees, with woeful fright, Shook by his rage, and bullied by his might ; 60 C Straws ( 6 ) Straws from the lanes difpersM, and whirl'd in air, The bluftering wonders of his mouth declare. Heav'd from their deep foundations, with dread found, Barns and old houfes thunder to the ground, And bowing oaks, in ages rooted ftrong, 65 Roar through their branches as he fweeps along. He breakfafts on the road, gulps tea, bolts toafl: ; Jokes with the waiter, witty with the hofi: ; Runs to the garden, with his morning dues ; Makes mouths at Cloacina's; reads the news. yo Now mad for fruit, he fcours the garden round ; Knocks every apple that he fpies, to ground ; Loads evVy royal pocket, feeks his chaife ; Plumps in, and fills the village with amaze. He's off again — he fmokes along the road ! 75 Purfue him, Pye — purfue him with an ode : And ( 7 ) And yet a pajloral might better pleafe ; That talks of flieep, and hay, and beans and peas ; Of trees cut down, that Richmond's lawn adorn, To gain the pittance of a peck of corn. 80 He reaches Weymouth — treads the Efplanade — Hark, hark, the jingling bells ! the cannonade! Drums beat, the hurdigurdies grind the air ; Dogs, cats, old women, all upon the ftare : All Weymouth gapes with wonder — hark ! huzzas ! 85 The roaring welcome of a thoufand jaws ! O Pye, fhalt Thotiy Apollo's fav'rite fon, In loyalty by Peter be outdone ? How oft I bear thy mafter on my back, Without one thimblefuU of cheering fack ; go Verre79. Of trees cut down .'^ Great has been the maflacre among the fturdy oaksy to make room for the courtier-like pliability of the corn Jialk, that brings TCioxt grijl to the Royal Mill. While ( s ) While /y5^//, (not drunk, I hope) O Bard divine, Oft wett'ft thy whiftle with the Muse's wine. O hade where proftrate Courtiers Monarchs greet, Like cats that feek t\\QfunJhi7te of the ftreet ; Where Chesterfield the lively fpaniel fprings, 95 P.uns, leaps, and makes rare merriment for Kings ; Where fharp Macmanus, and fly Jealous, tread, To guard from Treach'ry's blow the Royal Head ; Where Nunn and Barber, filent as the moufe. Steal, nightly, certain goods to Glo'fter Houfe. lOO Verfe 98. To guard from Treach^rt^s blow the Royal Head.'] Be it recol- le61:cd with horror that aftonewas flung at our beloved Sovereign in St. James's Park, endangering his life ; yet an impudent Rhymer thought ctherwife -, who, on the occafion, had the audacity to write the following Epigram : Talk, no m re of the lucky efcape of the heady From a flint fo unwittingly thrown : I think very diflr''ient — vith thoufands indeed, 'Twas a lucky efcape for xhcftone, Verfe 99. IVhereNum and Barber^. Two tradefmen who repair conftantly from London to Weymouth, when Royalty deigns to vifit the fpot. Ofay. ( 9 ) O fay, fliall Cesar in rare prefents thrive; Buy cheaper, too, than any man alive ; Go cheaper in excurfions on the water, And Laureat Pye know nothing of the matter ? Adls that fhould bid his Poet's bofom flame, lo^ And make his fpend thrift fubjeds blufh with fliame. What though Tom Warton laugh'd at Kings and Queens, And, grinning, ey'd them juft as StaU Machines ; Much better pleas'd (fo flck of royal life) To celebrate 'Squire Punch and Punch's wife? t lo I grant thee deep in Attic, Latian lore ; Yet learn the province of the Muse of yore : The Bards of ancient times (fo Hist'ry flngs) Eat, drank, and danc'd, and flept with mighty Kings, Who courted, reverenc'd, lov'd the tuneful throng, 115 And deem'd their deeds ennobled by a fong. D Lo, ( 10 ) Lo, Pitt arrives ! alas, with lantern face ! '' What, hxy Pitt, hx — what, Pitt, hx, more difgr ace ?'* '^ Ah, Sire, bad news ! a fecond dire defeat ! «' Vendee undone, and all the Chouans beat !" 120 " Hxy hx — what, what? — beat, beat? — what, beat agen ? " Well, well, more money — raife more men, more men. " But mind, Pitt, h^ — mind, huddle up the news ; '' Com fomething, and the growling land amufe : *' Make all the Sa7zs- culottes to Paris caper, 12^ '' And Rose (hall print the vid'ry in his Paper. *« Let's hear no more, no more of Cornifli tales — " I {ban t refund a guinea, Pitt, to Wales: " I can't afford it, no — I can't afford : " Wales coil a deal in pocket-cafli and board. 130 u Pitt, Pitt, there's Frost, my bailiff Frost — fee, fee! *^ Well, Pitt, go back, go back again — b'ye, b'ye: 5 " Keep ( ir ) *^ Keep Loi^DON ftill — no matter how they carp — " Well, well, go back, and bid Dundas look iliarp. " Muft not lofe France — no, France muft wear a crown : " If France won't fwallow, ram a monarch down, 136 " Some crowns are fcarce V70v\h. fixpences — hae, Pitt ? — '* The Premier fmird, and left the Royal Wit. Now Frost approaches — " Well, Frost, well, Frost, pray, ** How, how went fheep a fcore ? — -how corn and hay ?" " An't pleafe your Majefty, a charming price i 141 *' Corn very foon will be as dear as fpice," '• Thank God ! but fay, fay, do the poor complain ? " H«, h«, will wheat be fixpence. Frost, a grain ?" " I hope noty Sire ; for great were then my fears, 145 " That Windsor would be pulFd about our ears." *' Frost, ( IE ) *' Frost, Frost, no politics — no, no, Frost, no: " You, you talk politics ! oho, oho ! *' Windsor come down about our ears ! what, what? '' D'ye think, has, hae, that Tm afraid of that ? 15c '' What, what are foldiers good for, but obey? '' Macmanus, Townsend, Jealous, has, h«, h« ? *' Pull Windsor down? hxy what? — a pretty job ! '' Windsor be pull'd to pieces by the mob ! ^^ Talk, talk of farming — that's yom fort ^ d'ye fee; 155 '^ And mind, mind, politics belong to me, " Go back, go back, and watch the Windfor chaps ; " Count all the poultry; fet, fet well the traps." *' See, fee! fee! Stacie — here, here, Stacie, here — ^' Going to, market, Stacie ?— dear, dear, dear 1 160 Verfe 159. See SrjciE,'] The honed Mailer of the Royal Hotel. " I get ( n ) *^ I get all my provifion by the mail — *' Hxy money plenty, Stacie ? don't fear jail. ^^ Rooms, rooms all full ? ha^, h^ ? no beds to fpare ? " What, what ! give travelers, hae, good fare, good fare? . *' Good lign, good fign, to have no empty beds ! 165 '' Shows, {hows that people like to fee Crown'd Heads.'* The Mail' arrives ! hark ! hark ! the cheerful horn, To Majesty announcing oil and corn ; Turnips and cabbages, and foap and candles ; And lo, each article Great Cesar handles ! 170 Bread, cheefe, fait, catchup, vinegar, and muftard, Small beer, and bacon, apple-pye, and cuftard : All, all, from Windsor greets his frugal Grace, For Weymouth is a d-mn'd expenfive place. E Sal'sb*ry ( H ) Sal'sb'rv appears, the Lord of ftars and firings ; 17^ Prefents his poem to the bejl of Kings. Great C.^sar reads it — feels a laughing fit, And wonders Sal'sb'ry fhould become a wit. A batch of bullocks ! fee Great Cjesar run : He flops the Drover — bargain is begun. 180 He feels their ribs and rumps — he fhakes his head — ^' Poor, Drover, poor — poor, very poor indeed.'* C^sAR and Drover haggle — difference fplit — How much ? — a fliilling ! what a royal hit ! A load of hay in fight ! Great C^sar flies — 185 Smells— {hakes his head — " Bad hay — four hay" — he buys. Verfe 176. Prefents his poem.] This high Lord is really a high Poet. His Journey to Weymouth, which I was horribly afraid would have foreflallcd mine with the Public, v/ill make its appearance foon, and, I am informed, it is to be enriched with royal annotation. '' Smell, ( IS ) *' Smell, CouRTOWN— fmell — good bargain — lucky load — ^^ Smell, CouRTowN — fvveeter hay was never mowM." A herd of fvvine goes by I — " Whofe hogs are thefe ? ^' Has, Farmer, hs ?" — '^ Yours, Meafler, if yow pleaze.'* ^* Poor, Farmer, poor — lean, loufy, very poor — 191 <' Sell, fell, h^, fell?"— Ifs, Meafter, to be zure : *' My pigs were made for zale, but what o'that ? *' Yow caall mun ka^ ; now, Zur, I caall mun vai — ^' Meafter, I baant a ftarling — can't be cort; 195 " Yow think, agofh, to ha the pigs vor nort^'* Lo ! C^sAR buys the pigs — he flily winks — *^ Hae, GwiNN, the fellow i^ not caught^ he thinks— *' Fool, not to know the bargain I have got ! *^ Hje, GwiNN — nice bargain — lucky, lucky loti'^ 2C0 Enter ( i6 ) Enter tlie dancing dogs ! they take their ftations ^ ' They bow, they curtfy to the Lord of Nations. They dance, they flcip, they charm the K— of Fun, While Courtiers fee themfelves almofi: outdofia^ Lord Paulet enters on his hands and knees, 205 Joining the hunts of hares with hunts of fleas»- Enter Sir Joseph ! gladd'ning royal eyes ! What holds his hand ? a box of butterflies,, Grubs, nefts, and eggs of humming-birds, to pleafe;. Noots, tadpolesy brains of beetles, flings of bees. 210- The noble Prefldent without a bib on,- To fport the glories of his blufhing ribbon.!. Verfe 206. Joining the hunts of haresivith hunts of fleas.'] The Earl has won the Royal fmile, and is made a Lord of the Jied-chamber j but as ca- pricious inconftancy is a prominent featurt in the Erunfwick family, a royal frown may be at no great diflance. 4 The ( '7 ) The Fifhermeii ! the Fifhermen behold ! A fhoal of fidi ! the men their nets unfold ; Surround the fcaly fry — they drag to land : 215 CiESAR and Co. rufh down upon the fand ; The fifhes leap about — Gods ! what a clatter ! CiESAR, delighted, jumps into the water — He marvels at the fifh with fins and fcales — He plunges at them — feizes heads and tails ; 220 Enjoys the draught — he capers — laughs aloud, And fhows his captives to the gaping crowd. He orders them to Glo'fter Lodge — they go : But are the Fifhermen rewarded ? — NO ! ! ! Ci^sAR fpies Lady Cathcart with a book; 225 He flies to know what 'tis — he longs to look. " What's in your hand, my Lady ? let me know." <• A book, an't pleafe your M y." " Oho ! F <' Book's ( i8 ) *' Book's a good thing— good thing — I like a book. " Very good thing, my Lady— let me look — 230 " War of America ! my Lady, hx ? *' Bad thing, my Lady !— fling, fling that away." A Sailor pops upon the Royal Pair, On crutches borne— an objed of Defpair : His fqualid beard, pale cheek, and haggard eye, 235 Though /^«/, pour for help a piercing cry. <« Who, who 2iTeyou ? what, what ? hae, what are you ?'* " A many my Liege, whom Kindness never knew. '< A failor ! failor, hae ? you've loft a leg." " I know It, Sir — which forces me to beg. 240 " I've nine poor children, Sir, befides a wife— " God blefs them! the fole comforts of my life." 5 « Wife ( 19 ) * Wife and nine children, has ? — all, all alive ? ^ No, no, no wonder that you cannot thrive. * Shame, fliame, to fill your hut with fuch a train ! 245 * Shame to get brats for others to maintain ! * Get, get a wooden leg, or one of cork : * Wood's cheapeft — yes, get wood, and go to work. ' But mind, mind, Sailor — hae, haj, hae — hear, hear — ' Don't go to Windfor, mind, and cut one there : 250 * That's dangerous, dangerous — there I place my traps — ' Fine things, fine things, for legs of thieving chaps: ' Beft trapsj my traps— take care— they bite, they bite, * And fometimes catch a dozen legs a night." ' Oh! had 1 money, Sir, to buy a leg!" 255 * No money, hae ? nor I — go beg— go beg."— How Verfe 246. For others to maintain,'] Is not this farcafm as applicable to hronti as hovds^ ( 20 ) How fweetly kind to bid the cripple mwnp^ And cut from other' people s trees a ftiimp ! How vaftly like our kind Archbishop M-re, Who loves not beggar tribes at Lambeth door; 260 Of meaner Parfons bids them afk relief- There, carry their coarfe jugs for broth and beef! " Mine Gote ! your Mafhcfty 1— don't hear fu(h fluff: " De Workhoufe always geefs de poor enough. '' Why make bout dirty leg fufh wond'rous fufs ? — 265 *' And den, what impudence for beg of Us 1 *' In Strelitz, O mine Gote ! de beggars fkip : *' Dere, for a fharity, we geefs a whip, ** Money Verfe 259* Archhijhop M—e.'] Our tender Metropolitan, as well as the de licate fenfibility of Mrs. M — e, arc really tired with the number of poor creatures who, three times a week, have, from time immemorial, claimed the charitable donation of broth and meat from Lambeth Palace. It is pretty •well known that a ftrong application has been made for the removal of this nuijancei tut hitherto without fuccefs. ( 21 ) " Money make fubje<5ls impudent, I'm fure— ^' Refped be always where de peepePs poor^ 270 ^^ How, Sailor, did you lofe your leg ?— hae, hae ?'' " I loft it, pleafe your Majefty, at lea, ^' Hard fighting for my country and my King." " H^, what P^that's common, very common thing. *' H^ ! lucky fellow, that you were not drilVd^ 275 " Some lofe their heads, and many men are kill'd. *^ Your parifli? where's your parifh? h^.— where, where?" « I ferv'd my 'prenticefhip in Manchefter.'* " Fine town, fine town — full, full of trade and riches— *' H«, Sailor, h^, can you make leather breeches ? 280 «' Thefe come from Manchefter — there, there I got 'em !" On which Great Caesar claps his buckfkin bottom. n " Muft { 22 } '' Muft not encourage vagrants — no, no, no — •^^ Muft not make laws, my lad, and break *cm too. *' Where, vvhere's your parifh, h^e ? and where's your pafs ? '• Well, make hafte home — Fve got, I've got no brafs." Now to the Esplanade a feat is borne, , To eafe the Q^— 's fweet bottom and her corn ;, For corns are apt e'en Maj'ejiy to bite. As well as on poor toes to vent their fpite* 290 Around the gracious Q^ — of England, lo. Dames of the Bedchamber, a goodly row ! Mob pafling by, of Majesty fo fond, Dipping, like ducks, their noddles in a pond. How would this fight of Strelitz charm the foul? 295 A ^//)/ land, although a fpider hole ! ^ Avaunt, ( 23 ) Avaunt, all Frail-ones, from the Q^ — 's chafte view \ Pollution taints the air with fuch a crewi Dare ye approach ? full foon ye meet refiftance ; Imhoff's pure wife fhall {hove you at a diftance : 300 The East's proud Empress, who, with di'mond wand,^. Can vifit the firfl Lady of the Lani>; Nay, more, the chronicles of truth aver, Can make the Land's first Lady vifit f)er / She comes ! the Majesty of this fair Ifle 305 Greets Mistress Imhoff with an ell-wide fmile; Bids her partake the radiance of a Crown, And, on the feaf of Innocence, fit dowru Lo ! down fhe fits ! the mob, all envying, views, As Mistress Imhoff whifpers Indian news. 310 The ( 24 ) The Stadtholder ! he joins Queen Charlotte — hump Falls on the feat of Royalty, his rump ! Peace to his fpirit ! he begins to doze ! He fnorcs ! heav'ns blefs the trumpet of his nofe ! So great is folly, that the world mayhap 315 Shall, grinning, point at Hoogen Moogen's nap. Princes of Europe, pray exclaim not " fhame!'' Go, for Mankind's repofe, and do the fame. My Lady H e appears ! how large ! Deep-laden, like a camel, or a barge. 320 what's all beneath her petticoats ? — Shawls, chintz — Why fhould the Mufe, indeed, the matter mince ? Muflins the richeft, of the fertile Eaft. Lo, back {he moves again, to be undreft ! At Glo'fter-Lodge, upon the bed fhe fquats, 325 To drop the lumber, fhawls, and broider'd brats ; Where ( 25 ) Where England's happy her fteps purfues> Attends the labour, and turns accoucheufe. Hark ! Cesar and the little children talk ; Together laugh, together too they walk : 330 The mob around admire their pleafant things, And marie that children talk as well as Kings. And now to Delamot's the M h fpeeds : He catches up a fcore of books, and reads — Learns nothing — fudden quits the book-abode— 335 Orders his horfe, and fcours the Dorfet road. He's in again ! he boards the barge — fets fail-— Jokes with the failors, and enjoys the gale : Defcants on winds and waves — -the land regains, And gives the Tars juft nothing for their fains / 340 For, what a bore that Kings their Jlaves fhould pay ! Sufficient is the ho?iour of the day ! H Now ( 20 ) Now fprings the'Sov'REiGN wildly to the feas — Rufhcs intrepid in — along to knees ! — Old Neptune, jealous of his world, looks big— 345 And bluft'ring Boreas blows away his wig. O Pye ! amidft fuch doings canft t\io\iJleep ^ Such wonders whelping on the land and deep ! So nobly form'd to deck th' hiftoric page, Aftonifh man, and fwell the Muse's rage ! 350 Thus, thus I fing of Royalty, unpaid y. In Courts obferve, and follow to the Ihade ^ And mean, God willing, fince thou wilt not write, To give each word and adion to the light ; With daily deeds my voice fublimely raife, 355, And found wife fpeeches into diftant days^ In ( 27 ) In fpite of low Democracy, the Brute, Kings fliall at length regain their hfi repute. The poor funk Falcon, robb'd of ev'ry plume, That fnaps the ground, and mourns his humble doom, 360 With powerful pinion foon from earth fhall rife. Mix with the folar blaze, and fweep the fkics. Such fhall be done, if pow'r the Bard can boaft. Who deems the breed too precious to be loft. And fince Augustus deign'd with Bards to dine, 365 And, bleft with Bards, Mec^enas drank his wine ; O let us hope that mighty modern Kings May ceafe to clafs the Bards with vulgar things^ And of the tuneful Tribe ^\v!L Jo^newhat higher^ Than Nenvgate's Bellman^ or a Country Ciyer I 370 Should Verfe 370. ^ban Newgate's Bellmatti or a Country Cryer.'\ Never were the AoiJ'oj, alias Poets, in more difefleem than at the Court of the Brunswicks. Homer, finging of fuch as were the greateft favourites of ancient Monarchs, 5 mentions ( 28 ) Should this rare sera rife, and Brunswick's Grace Revive the drooping glory of his race ; How happy at Saint James's, my friend Pye, At Buckingham and Windsor, T'hou and /, To fee fair Genius re-afllime her reign ; 375 Dullness and Avarice expell'd the fcene \ The fat'ning Bards their laurell'd fronts difplay. And proudly triumph over Hogs and Hay ! Once more then let me beg thee, lazy Pye, To follow Monarchs wherefoe'er they fly: 380 When from the lofty pinnacle of thrones, They (ink, to tread, with vulgar folks, the ftones ; mentions ItjTTipa Kaxwv, T?x7oy« A»pwv, and M«vtii;, i. e, a Doctor, a House- Carpenter, and a Conjuror. Thefe our beloved S n, foi'ovving this clafTical example of antiquity, \\2iS noticed diVid recommended : Doctor Willis, to Parliannent ; Sir William Chambers, to the Comptrollerfhipc/ the Board of Works } and Signor Pinetti, to the Patronage of all the wife of the Metropolis. To ( 29 ) To Weymouth waves, and fands, and fliops repair ; Dafh country Joans with dread, and Bumpkins fcare : For ever trifling, and for ever bleft, 385 In laugh, and hop, and fkip, and jump, and jeft — How like the ruftic boy, the Ample Thing, Who only wifh'd to be a mighty King ; (So meanly modeft was his pray'r to Fate) To eat fat porky and ride upon a gate I 350 Mr. «!SS9 Mr. P I T T' % FLIGHT TO WIMBLEDON. Just as I prophefy'd ! — the ftorm begins ! And thou art ofF — for Wimbledon, I ween, To hide thee there for all thy courtly fins, So complaifant indeed to King and Queen ! Loud was thy window's crafli — a fhow'r of ftones 395 Pour'd in thick voUies from the anger'd Mob. How the rude pebbles fought thy vanifh'd bones ! And cry' d aloud, " Where is the fellow's knob?'' But difappointed, on the carpet fpread, They griev'd they could not rattle round thy head. 40 o 5 DuNDAs's ( 31 ) DuNDAs's hay-loft foon, I guefs, In fecrecy wilt thou poffefs ; Or elfe another fecret namelefs place — A fweet afylum from the rage Of fuch as defp'rate battle wage 405 With men who plunge the Nation in difgracc. This was a terrible affair ! Undoubtedly it made thee ftare \ Indeed I think that thou wert right, To afk the friendfhip of a flight. 410 Alas ! when Danger his flern form reveals, There's really wifdom in a pair of heels ! Since not a foul dares ope his jaws To plead, O Pitt, thy awkward caufe, ru ( 32 ) I'll be thy Counsel, Man, to bring thee off: 4.15 Not fave thy reputation — no — That's an herculean work, I trow ; Thy name muft bear, indeed, th' eternal feoff. Come from thy hay-loft then, or thy retreat. Where Cloacina keeps her filent feat, 420 And let me lead thee to the People's eye. Kneel down before them— own thy heavy guilt, For meannefs and King-flatt'ry — treafure fpilt. And other fins too glaring to deny* This then be thy confeffion, Pitt : — 4^5 " Alas I by mad Ambition bit, " And grinding hunger, too, 1 needs muft fay ; " Where fickle Fortune loves to fport, ^* I fought ( 33 ) ^' I fought the region of the Court ; '' But Confcience damns, alas ! the idle day. 430 '' I bawl'd Reform with Richmond's Lord, " But never meant to keep my word. ^' Our bawlings frighten'd the Great Man and Woman ; '' With patriot threats we forc'd our way ; " And, while 'twas funfliine, made our hay, * 435 "A trick with Statefmen by no means uncommon. '' Ye gave me credit for my cries, " And, gull'd, with pleafure faw me rife ; " Though foon, too foon, ye mock'd the royal choice ; '' Too foon I read in ev'ry face 440 " The hift'ry of a fad difgrace, ** Heard execration load the gen'ral voice. K " The ( 3-f ) *' The breeze of popularity foon dy'd — " Soon ebb'd of Fame, alas ! th' inconftant tide : '' Yet held I places, in the people's fpite ^ 445 '' Agreed, arnongfl: my other fms, ^' For cur fed Hanoverian fkins ; '^ Agreed for Gallic Defpotiiln to fight : *« Agreed to pay th' Apothecary's bill, '« And load, with your good grift, the Royal mill. 450 " Whifper'd the Nation's purfe was all their own ; '' That fubjeds were rank rafcals to complain ; " Who, filent, ought to bear their galling chain ^ '' And fwore rebellion lurk'd in ev'ry groan. " I own the Royal barns are full of corn y 455 " The fineft, fatteft beeves the land adorn , r '' The ( 35 ) " The faireft flieep in Windfor fields are feen : *' Increafe on evVy acre fmiles, *' The richefl 'mid the Queen of Ifles : — " All thefe belonging to our K. and Q^ 460 ^' But what can I ? — I dare not fpeak — •■' I dare not fay the People fqueak, *' And fuUen look, and threat, and fwear, and cry ; '^ 'Tis a vile fhame the realm fhould ftarve : '' Why fhould not they have fowls to carve ? 465 *' Although he is, forfooth, fo wond'rous high^ '* V/e put him there — we gave him all his money — '' 'Tis hard the bees fhould want a little honey. *' R D fliall out, the man of leathern guns, " Whom Brav'ry fcoms, and beauteous Science Jhuns ; « Whom ( 36 ) '' Whom feeming idiotifm and madnefs rules ; *' The verieft laughing-flock of verieft fools. ** H Y no more fhall drain the hedic State, *' And fuck, the leach, the Empire to her fate. *' Lo, from the feat of Justice will I fweep 475 '' The FUR-CLAD Rogue, renown'd for ftealing fheep. '^ I bluili to tliink I helped the wars of Kings, ^' And, meanly crouching, made a royal pother. '' I now think Princes very fo-/o things ; '' The one half cheats, and arrant foois the other. 480 '' E'en to the tune (he choofes, let her dance : ^' I'll cram no defpots down the throat of France. " I own Verfe 476. Renozvn'd for Jlealing fieep.'] Whether lh\s notorious and lofry Limb of the Law will be lianged or nor, even the prophetic powers of the Mufe c:innoi foretell ; bur that a fcore of ftolen (hecp, which the owners fwore to, were in this fellow's pens, exhibited for fale lately at a country fair, is a fa(5l that admits of no contradidion. Many bets are pending; and the odds, as well as the hopes of tliC country, are on the rope. ( 37 ) ^' I own myfelf, alas ! an arrant fool, *' Not to fufpedt, and look that P ruffian through : " Yet to Hypocrisy I went to fchool ; 485 *' But, hang the fellow, ' he was Yorkshire too." When out of place, then " right is State reform — *' Oh ! venal Parliaments are curfed thino-s :'' But, when in place — *' Don't, don't provoke the ftorm ; *' Why alter, why difpleafe the beji of Kings ?" 490 Such is the creed of all the Courtier train ; Rocks of our hopes — the Imps that we maintain. /■'^ As fharks and whales pick daily a good difh ^' From all the dainty under- world of filTi, ** So Tyrants, at a moft ungodly rate, 495 *' For human difhes daily, hourly, prowl ; L ^* And »,) And wafh it down, fo dainty, with a dram ! How ( 45 ) How fimple ! like to many an ancient King, That roafted royal dinners by a firing, 40 And turn'd the royal rapier to a fpit : Though full of magnanimity, could ftoop To boil, in their grand helmets, beef and foup. And eat from thence, fo great their faving wit ! When good Prince — — deign d vijtt our fmall Ifle, 45 Grand foul ! he came in very humble ftyle — Cut no huge figure — made no mighty flafh : Two {hirts belong'd unto the princely lad \ '^Twas all the linen treafure that he had^ Which poor old Mother Davie s us'd to wafli \ 50 Goody of Richmond I Mother to the Man Who ftrikes with rev'rent awe the Eton Clan. Verfe 45. When good Prince ■}. The name of this young Strelitz man or Prince is abfolutely forgotten i but he is, or was, full brother to our mod graciotts Queen. Verfe 51. Mother to th4 Man.] Dr. Davies, the prefent Provoft of Eton College, N '' Dear ( 46 ) *^« Dear Prince,'' quoth Mother Davies, *' many a time «' The lad in linen was fo wond'rous fhort, '^ I've made *n wait until I clean d the grime, 55 *« To make 'n, like a Chrijlian^ go -to Court- «' Yes, on my thorn there, many and many an eye " Hath feen his Honour s linen put to dry ; <' But foon, indeed, t' increafe his little ftore, ^^ His Sister, Madam, made a couple more." 60 But to return — folks thought ftrange things of yore, When no abfurdity Belief could fhock ; When Gossip Prejudice put in her oar. To fcuU the fimple mind on Error's rock. What thoufands thought that Kings and Queens era goldf That beef and mutton was too coarfe a fare ; 4 And ( 47 ) And that their bodies were fo ^.n^ly fouFdy They breath' d a fluid beyond vulgar air, -Could not conceive that air fo grofs and comfnon^ Entering a dog's, and cat's, and monkey's nofe, ' 70 Inflated a ^uee?i\ lungs, fo great a womanly Or Kingly whom fuch rare par fides compofc. Yes ! 'tis confefs'd that Folly rul'd Mankind — "Twas once the fame with me^ the Bard, I find. ,1 grant that I, in Hfe's more early day, 75 D.eem'd Ylv^g^ you7ig God-ah?iighties — form'd for Sway ; The Universe, fee Jimpk — all their own : Though now I think the People claim a right To fomewhat rather larger than a mite ; Nay, that we fliould e'en halve it with the Throne, 80 I cry'd ( 48 > I cry'd, " Nought's little which great Kings approve : " Kings turn, like Midas, all they touch to gold — " Witnefs Lord Hawk sb'ry, turnd^ by Royal Love^. '' From ye7iki7ifon^ a clod of meaneft mould.'* What is there in 2ifog? '^.Lord ! nought!" ye cry. 85 To me a fog was 07ice important — why ? C^SAR with glory cloth'd the fog, I trow — Ah ! how ? — Read, read the ffory, and ye '11 know. CiESAR AND THE FO G, C.£SAR, upon a fummer's golden day,. Got early from his bed to fmell his hay, 90 And fee if all his fowls were fafe and found ; And likewife fee what traps had legs and feet Belonging unto men who wifh'd to treat Their chaps with chicken, on forbidden ground. Enter ( 49 ) Enter a General (Carpenter) low bowing, 95 •Scraping, and, mandarin-like, nodding, ploughing, With nofe of rev'rence fweet, the humble grafs.- — ^^ Hge, Gen'ral, hae? what news, what news in town ?*' " None, Sire.*' — " None, Gen'ral ? — Gen ral, has, none^ ^* Nothing, indeed, O King, is come to pafs.** roo ^' Strange ! ftrange !— what, what— fee nothing on the way? " Hse, hse ?" cry'd C^sar, all for news agog. ^* Nothing, my Liege — no, nothing, I may fay^ ^' Excepting upon Hounllow, Sir, ^ fog^ *' Fog upon Hounflow, Gen ral ? — large fog, hae, 105 ^^ Ox fmall iogy Gen'ral?" — *' Large^ an't pleafe you^ Sire." << Strange, vaftly ftrange ! — what, large fog, large fog, pray? *' Yes, yes, yes — large fog, that I much admire." O C^SAR CiESAR and Carpenter nov/ talked of wars, Of cannon, bullets, fwords, and wounds, and fears : no When, in the middle of the fight, the King Sudden exclaim'd — '^ Fog upon Hounflow, hae ? '^ Large fog too, Gen'ral ? — well, go on, on, pray — " Strange ! very ftrange ! — extr'ordinary thing !'* Now dwelt the Gen'ral on the battle's rage, 1 1 r Where mufkets, mufkets — guns, great guns engage, Red'ning with blood the field, and ftream, and bog ; When, rufhing from the murd'rous fcene of glory, The Monarch fudden marr'd the Gen'ral's ftory — ** Fog upon Hounflow, Gen'ral — large, large fog?" 120 " Yes, Sir," faid Carpenter unto the King. — " Strange ! very ftrange ! — extr'ordinary thing !" At ( 5' ) At length the Gen'ral jinijh'd — lucky elf! — With much politenefsj and much fweat and pain. " Thank God !" the General whifper'd to himfelf — 125 " Curfe mcj if ever I find fogs again !" Thus, then, I rev'renc'd fogs in former days, Becaufe I worfliipp'd Kings ; and though I ceafe King-adoration, Kings fhall fhare my praife, Although the gape of Wonder may decreafe. 130 I ftar'd on Kings as Comets, with amaze i But now a deal diminifh'd is the blaze : Kings are mere tallow- candles, nine in ten, Wanting a little fnuffing now and then ; Harb'ring a Thief that plays a dangerous game ; 135 5 . Which { 52 ) Which if we did not watch, and ftrait purfue, The fat is in the fire ! and then adieu That greafe fo rich, the parent of the flame. Nay, worfe event from this fame Thief appears I The houfe^ at times, is burnt about our ears. 140 Yet pray, Sirs, take a King from Mister Pitt, And calmly to the Sov'reign's will fubmit ; And not, as ye have done, on madnefs border : Nay, lift to me, for oracles I tell— Kings for the People will do very well, 145 Like candles and their thieves^ when kept in order. ODE TO THE MILL, EreBed i7t Windsor Park, for grinding Corn at a cheap Rate, for the Poor. J. iaid^ his M y was very good I Ready to facrifice his royal blood — Yes, for the Poor, each precious drop to fpill : And now behold the Corn is grinding down ; Such is the glorious bounty of the Crown ! 5 And, lo, in Windfor Park a ftately Mill ! Blow, blow, ye breezes — fafter, gentle gales ! Oh, for the Poor of Windsor, fill the fails ! P Eg HAM ( 54 ) * Egham and Staines — not Brentfordy that vile place Whofe wicked imps, in Royalty's defpite, lO RufliM to the Royal Gardens at deep night, And foully murdcr'd half the Dryad race. Blow, gentle gales ; ye breezes, harder blow ; Or foon the charity will ceafe to flow : Ships to Old Thaaies are pouring in with corn, 15 While Madam Ceres whets her fey the and hook ; I hear the clanking found in every nook ; The reaper's fong already cheers the morn. I /aid his Majefty was good and great ; And that the famifh'd Poor would have a treat: 20 And now, behold, they fatten on the flour ! Vile Chronicle, I know what thou wilt fay — ** Why do not Monarchs give the flour away ? " Why not a part oi hoarded millio7is pour ?" 4 Grind, ( 55 ) Grind, gentle Mill, and bring down all the bran ; 25 The blacker 'tis, the wholefomer for man. I know that fancy Englifhmen will fay : *' Why will not Monarchs ^/z;^ their beef away, ^' While Famine's face ftares forth from ev'ry door ? ** How, with an eafy heart, can Monarchs keep 30 *' Such droves of cattle, and fuch flocks of fneep, '' While Hunger gnaws the vitals of the Poor ?"' Grind, gentle Mill, w^ith fpeed, the corn away ; Nor heed what envious, jealous, people fay. *' Why," cries the Mob, '' bejewell'd fliines the Q^ — , 35 " While Poverty appears with fallow mien ? '' All know the millions — 'twas from tis they came : " To flhine, while thus we fuffer, is a fliame." Worms t ( 5^ ) Worms ! know ye not that Hanover is poor. The fav'rite fpot of our moft gracious K~- ? 40 And fliall no guineas^ O ye fools, go o'er, Where all our Princes drank at Wisdom's fpring ? Grind, gentle Mill — ^nor let one grain be loft : W^U knows the Monarch what a bufhel coft. Is not poor Strelitz very' poor indeed, 45 That gave this Nation a moft gracious Q3 — ? And, O ye Rogues, in Hift'ry fhall we read. That guineas never were in Strelitz feen ? Inform me, fools, what jewels can go there^ . To match the goodly Jewel fent us here P 50 Fools ! was not Hesse as poor as a church moufe, Till good Amelia fent her thoufands o'er ? At { SI ) At once lank Poverty foriook the houfe, And, 'ftead oijlrawy a ca?'pet graced the floor. In thee what femblance unto K — s I find, 55 Not Britijhy but to Foreign K — s, I truft ; Who of the fimple Poor the faces grind, Juft as thou grindefl ev'ry grain to dufl. Grind, gentle Mill, with all thy kind endeavour ! O grind away ! — for better late than never ^ 60 Verfe 60. Better late than never.'] This meji afionijhing Charity foon expired. The children of Famine poured in tooplentifu.ly upon t c R(jyal munificence; which very ioon muft have reduced Majefty to the fame moll pitiable fitu^ ation ! INSTRUC- HINT TO A POOR DEMOCRAT. Say not unto a K , " Thou fool !" — For why ? 'Tis unpolite— though poffibly no lie : The fpeech too blights Preferment's opening bud. Make Monarchs and Dame Wisdom near relations, And all the Virtues too — fuch kin-creations 5 May work thy temporalities much good. Laud to each word, however weak, be giv*n, And let each earthy adion fcent of heavn. To ( 59 ) To cry ^' Thou fool !" were foolifli, let me fay ; Becaufe Kings have fo much to give away, — lO Steps to Preferment are compos'd oifiattWies : So eafily ye fcale her lofty walls, Juft as ye mount the fummit of St. Paul's— But truths ! — aye, what are truths ? — oh ! fatal batt'ries ! Or if we change the figure, fatal ropesy 1 5 That of Ambition hang the lofty hopes. Truths fliould be only fpoken of the Devil 5 Though that's ungrateful too y and eke uncivil. " But haft not Thou (exclaims the man of fpleen) ** Taken ftrange liberties with K and Q^ — ? 20* " Laugh'd at Idolatry who hugs a throne ?" Well ! grant my want of rev'rence for a Crown ; 5 Equal ( 6o ) Equal to him is Fortune's foile and frown, Whofc modeft teeth can deign to pick a hone^ My paffio?2s are the children (eafy creatures) 25 Of Moderation ! boaft the Mother's features,. And Mother's chafte limplicityj the dove; Can flecp upon the humble fod, and fwill. With great good glee, the valley's lucid rill. And batten on the berries of the grove. 30 Look at yon groupe of fucking pigs — how bleft ! What makes them fo ? — clean ftraw to form a neft I ^ojlight a thing their happinefs compofes ! What dialogue ! how arch they fquint about ! Now bury their fweet heads — now pull them outy 35 And tofs the wifps fo white upon their nofes. Thefe ( ^o Thefe pigs are juft my paffions, that can draw Mirth and contentment from a iGimple flraw. ■ Thy paffions are of lofty wing perchance^ Pant for the ortclan and wines of France ; Unblefl:, if ve?tfen turn not on thy fpit ; 40- Unbleft, if turtle fmoke not on thy board. Go then, and flatter Britain's mighty Lord, Kneel to Dundas, and proftrate fall to Pitt,. R ODE ODE TO THE ELEPHANT, yujl arrived from Bengal, as a Prefent from the Nabob of Arcot to Her Majesty. X ooR fellow ! thou art come, but come In vain ; And mayft as well, methinks, go back again ! Thy meat and paffage give our Court the fpleen : Dear, very dear, is now all fort of meat ; And all fuch lucklefs prefents as can eat ij Have found no favour yet with K — or Q^. Now hadft thou been a diamond (no bad fize), Or pearl, or ruby, how the royal eyes 4 Had ( h ) Had idolized thee ! gloried to behold ! Rather too bulky for a broche^ I fear, lO Or pin.^ or pretty pejtdajtt for the ear — But then thou wouldfl have been cut up and fold. Yes ! thou hadft then been v/elcome — but alas 1 Smce nought h\xtflejh and blood! then munching grafs. And what is moft infufferable, corn \ i j Such fad expences never can be borne* Of Windsor, Richmond, Kew, the helplefs Poor, Whofe plaints have made the Royal eyes run o'er, Live on their gracious bounty ev'ry day : For them their Graces ope their golden bags ; 20 To good warm broad-cloth change their dirty rags, And round their hovel caft a royal ray. ■Seek ( 64 ) Seek then thy glooms again, and dufky loves — The Great Mogul perhaps of Eaftern groves. A cryhig fm, O Elephant, is thine— 25' Thyy?^;//^^/6-form'd on fuch a nionftrous fcale ! E'en Strelitz peopJey who in eating fhine. Not quite Uke tke with heavy loads regals. Yet not to Strelitz be deny'd applaufe : Wide are their mouths, and fack-like are their maws. 3d Yet if refolv'd to live with Queens and Kings ; While meat and drink are fuch expenfive things ; - Pull out thy ftomach, cut away thy fnout, And try, poor fellow, try to live without. The The sorrows of SUNDAY: An elegy. The intended Annihilation of Sunday s harmlefs Amufements, by three or Jour moft outrageoujly-zealous Members of Parliament, gave birth to the following Elegy, The Hint is borrowed from a fmall Compofition, entitled ** The Tears ^Old May-Day.** iLD was the breath of Mom : the blufhing iky Received the lufty Youth with golden hair. Rejoicing in his race, to run, to fly ; As Scripture fays, '^ a Bridegroom debonnaire ;" When, full of fears, the decent Sunday rofe, r And wander'd fad on Kenfington's fair green : S Down ( 66 ) Down in a chair (he funk with all her woes. And touch'd, with tendereft fympathy, the fcene^. '' O hard Sir Richard Hill !" exclaim'd the Dame ; " Sir V/illiam Dolben, cruel man !" quoth {he ; lo " And Mister WiLBERFORCE, for fhame ! for fhame ! '' To fpoil my little weekly jubilee. ^' Ah ! pleas'd am I the humble Folk to view ; " Enjoying harmlefs talk, and fport, and jeft ; ^' Amid thefe walks their footfteps to purfue, 15 ** To fee them fmiling, and fo trimly dreft. '* Since the Lord refted on xh^feventh day^ " Which {howeth that Omnipotence was tird\ '' As Moses in old times, was pleas'd to fay. iC (And Moses was moft certainly infpird) ;. 20 S " Why ( 67 ) « Why (Kould n,ot Man too reft ?" ^' No !" cries Sir Dick : " At Brothsr Rowland's let him knock his knees, '' Pray, fweat, and groan ; of this damn'd world be fick ; " Of mangy morals crack the lice and fleas ; " Break Sin's vile bones — pull Satan by the nofe; 25 " Scrub, with the foap and fand of Grace, the foul j " Give Unbelief, the wrcich, a rats-bane dofe ; <' And ftop, with malkins of rich Faith, each hole : " Spit in foul Drunkenness's beaftly mug;.. " Kill, with fharp prayers, each oJspiing of the Devil ; ** Give, to black Blasphemy, a Corniin hug ; 31 <' And box, with bats of Grace, the ears of Evil." Susan, the conftant flave to mop and broom ; And Marian, to the fpit's and kettle's art ; Ah I ( 68 ) Ah ! lliall not ihey^ defert the houfe's gloom, 35 Breathe the frefli air one moment, and look fmart ? Meet, in fome rural fcene, a Colin's fmile ; With love's foft ftories, wing the happy hour 5 Drop in his dear embraces from the ftyle. And fhare his kiffes in the fhady bow'r ? 40 " No !" roars the Huntingtonian Priest — " No, no ! " Lovers are liars — Love's a damned trade ; '' Kifling is damnable — to hell they go — " The Devil's claws await the Rogue and Jade. " My chapel is the purifying place : 45 '' There let them go to wafh their lins away : " There^ from my hand, to pick the crumbs of Grace, '' Smite their poor linful craws, and howl, and pray." — How ( ^9 ) How hard, the laboring hands no reft (hould know, But toAfix days beneath the galling load^ ro Poor fouls ! and then, t\\Qfeve7tth be forc'd to go And box the Devil, in Blackfriar's Road ! Heav'n glorieth not in phizzes of difmay ; Heav'n takes no pleafure in perpetual fobbing ; Confenting freely, that my fav'rite day 55 May have her tea and roUsj^ and hob and nobbing. In fboth, the Lord is pleased, when Man is bleft ; And wifheth not his bliffes to blockade : 'Gainft tea and coffee ne'er did he proteft,. Enjoy 'd, in gardens, by the men of trade. 60 Sweet is White-Conduit House, and Bagnigge-Wells; Chalk. Farm, where Primrose Hill puts forth her fmile ', T And Vcrfe 52. Blackfriar's Road.'] The place of Mr. Rowland IliU's Chapel, ( 70 ) And Don Saltero's, where mucli wonder dwells, Expelling Work-day's matrimonial bile. Life with the down of cygnets may be clad ! 65 Ah ! why not make her path a pleafant track ? *' No 1" cries the Pulpit Terrorist, (how mad !) '^ No ! let the world be one huge hedgehog's back." Vice (did his rigid mummery ilicceed) Too foon would fmile amid \X\Qf acred walls ; 70 Venus, in tabernacles, make her bed; And Paphos find herfelf amid Saint Paul's. Avaunt Hypocrisy, the folemn jade; *- Who, wilful, into ditches leads the blind : Makes, of her -canting art, a thriving trade, J5 And fattens on the follies of mankind ! 4 Look ( 71 ) Look at Archbishops, Bishops, on a Faft, Denying hackney-coachmen e'en their beer ; Yet, lo ! their Butchers knock, withy?^ refajiy With turbots^ lo ! the FisHxMongers appear ! 80 The Potboys howl with porter for their bellies ; The Bakers knock, with cuftards, tarts, and pies \ Confectioners, with rare ice creams and jellies ; The Fruiterer, lo, wdth richefl pine fupplies ! Infecret^ thus, they eat, and booze, and nod; 85 In public^ call indulgence a d-mn d evil ; Order their fimple flocks to "icWi with God^ And ride the^njelves an airing with the Devil, THE END. AN ENTIRE NEW WORK. '^lift pubUfhed, Price ip, 6d.. 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