TEPS lEo rRAINING Digitized by tine Internet Archive in 2008 witin funding from IVIicrosoft Corporation http://www.archive.org/details/firststepsincliilOOoshericli The Parent's Library Nine Volumes, Uniformly Bound. 12 mo. Cloth. Per Volume, $1.50 First Steps in Child Training By PROFESSOR M. V. O'SHEA The Trend of the Teens By PROFESSOR M. V. O'SHEA The Faults of Childhood and Youth By PROFESSOR M. V. O'SHEA Everyday Problems in Child Training By PROFESSOR M. V. O'SHEA Putting Young America in Tune How to Teach the Child Appreciation of Music By HENRIETTE WEBER The Home Guide to Good Reading With Notes By PROFESSOR DAVID HARRISON STEVENS Tlie Proper Feeding of Infants By W. H. GALLAND, M. D. Diseases of Infancy and Childhood By W. H. GALLAND, M. D. Maternity and Infant Care jives of Mothers and CI How We Can Save Them By W. H. GALLAND, M. D. The Lives of Mothers and Children, How W^e Can Save Them THE CHILD IS THE HOPE OF THE RACE. tTbc parent's Xibrar? First Steps in Child Training BY M. V. O'SHEA Professor of Education, The University of Wisconsin and Educational Director, Mother's Magazine and Home Life '••»<• • < CHICAGO FREDERICK J. DRAKE & CO. PUBLISHERS ^ (JCqM^ClCU^^i^^ /ti>^ * bO^ b (o^ Copyright, 1920 By Frederick J. Drake & Co. Clilcago All Rights Reserved TLbc parent's Xibrar? A series of practical books relating to the care and culture of the young, published under the editorial supervision of Professor M. V. O'Shea of the University of Wisconsin, Edu- cational Director, and Mr. Paul E. Watson, Editorial Direc- tor, of Mother's Magazine and Home Life, in cooperation with which magazine this Library has been prepared. '?'61551 FOREWORD The author of this volume has served for many years as educational director of Mother's Magazine and Home Life and also as chairman of the department of education of the National Congress of Mothers and Parent-Teacher Asso- ciations. During these years he has discussed a large number of problems of child training with parents and teachers whom he has addressed and who have taken advantage of the opportunity of- fered by the Personal Service Bureau of M other ^s Magazine and Home Life to seek counsel and assistance in the rearing of their children. They have freely sought the author ^s advice and they have given him their experiences in employ- ing various methods in the instruction and dis- cipline of their children. It has been his custom to select the more fundamental and important questions asked by parents and teachers and sub- mit them for investigation to groups of advanced students engaged in the study of child nature and education. It has generally turned out that the author has made practical suggestions to those who have consulted him and they have in most 7 8 FOREWORD cases made a trial of these suggestions and have reported the results to the author. In this way a great many concrete instances illustrating char- acteristic traits of childhood and youth have been accumulated, and the outcome of different meth- ods of dealing with them has been accurately recorded. In the preparation of this volume the author has chosen for discussion the more vital of the problems which have been treated in the manner indicated, and he has suggested how these may best be solved under the conditions existing in different types of homes, schools and com- munities. The author has kept constantly in mind that most parents and teachers are neither familiar with nor interested in technical psychology, biol- ogy or hygiene. They are concerned with the immediate and pressing problems of gniding chil- dren in their intellectual, physical, ethical, and temperamental development. They wish to un- derstand why children act in certain ways and how they can most effectively divert them from wrong action. Parents and teachers are so en- grossed with the concrete activities of childhood and youth that they have little time to consider academic questions pertaining either to the na- ture of children or to their training; and conse- quently the author has avoided practically all merely theoretical exposition in this volume. He has confined the discussion throughout to typical FOREWORD 9 situations which confront most parents continually in the upbringing of their children. He has used terms which can be understood by those who have had little or no study of psychology, physiology and related sciences, though the suggestions for child training given herein are based upon data derived from these sciences. The author has not allowed himself to forget at any time that this book is designed for prac- titioners who are every hour face to face with childhood and youth in the concrete and who are training their children in some way whether right or wrong. He has undertaken the difficult task of applying science to practice without leading the practitioner over the technical ground upon which the practice is based. It would have been a sim- pler matter to have dwelt principally in the realm of theory and only occasionally to have made prac- tical application of scientific principles. This is one of a series of four volumes pre- pared for the Parent's Library. These volumes supplement one another, and are published simul- taneously. The title of each indicates that it deals with particular phases of the training of child- hood and youth but it has been written with rela- tion to the others in the series. The titles of the four volumes are: ^^ First Steps in Child Train- ing,'* '^Faults of Childhood and Youth,'' ^*The Trend of the Teens," '^Every-day Problems in Child Training." 10 FOREWORD The reader should bear in mind that the aim throughout each and all of these books has been to make the discussion intelligible and practical by presenting typical traits of childhood, as ex- hibited in the ordinary situations of daily life, and then endeavoring to explain these traits and to indicate how they should be dealt with when they are not in accord with the requirements of life in the home, in the school, and in the community. M. V. O'Shea. The University of Wisconsin. TABLE OF CONTENTS CHAPTER PAGE I First Steps in Intellectual Training. ... 1^ II First Steps in Health Training 36 III First Steps in Ethical Training 77 IV First Steps in Social Training 120 V First Steps in Language Training 155 VI First Steps in Training Disposition 186 VII The First Toys and Playthings 215 VIII First Steps in Home Instruction 235 IX Books on Child Training 268 Index 275 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING CHAPTER I FIRST STEPS IN INTELLECTUAL TRAINING The First Signs of Intelligence. — When can one notice the first signs of intelligence in a child? Usually not before the third month. Up until then nature gives her attention mainly to build- ing the body. The infant eats, sleeps and grows. He makes a little progress mentally during this interval, however, for his senses begin to awaken. He comes into life practically blind and deaf, and unable to discriminate tastes or odors except in the most rudimentary way. For the first two or three weeks, all his senses lie dormant. Then he begins to distinguish between light and dark. Loud noises awaken him from his sleep. But he is not much interested in the outside world, and he gives practically no attention to the reports that come in through any of the senses. The mother, watching her child's features during these weeks, is often disheartened because he does 13 14 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING not respond to her expressions. He simply stares. AA^en she speaks to him he does not ^^pay attention," as she would like to have him do. But note the change which occurs at about the ninth or Tenth week. Now the features become more expressive. The original stare gives way gradually to controlled, purposeful looking. And what is of far greater importance, the child begins to deal with the things around him. Dur- ing the first few weeks he does not try to seize or even touch anything, so he can not make much advance mentally, for progress can occur only when he takes an active attitude toward objects. But once he gets started in the use of his hands, he goes forward by leaps and bounds. Every day now one can see his intelligence strengthening. He begins to appreciate objects, which means that he discovers their qualities and finds out whether he can gain agreeable experience from them, or whether they will give him pain. A Child Is Sense Hungry. — A normal five- months-old child seems to be sense hungry. Na- ture commands him to see and hear everything he can, to try to put every object he handles into his mouth, and particularly to touch every new thing, and note whether it is hard or soft and how it is constituted. A child who is not acting in this way at six months of age is not develop- ing as nature intended he should do. If he con- INTELLECTUAL TRAINING 15 tinues to lie in liis cradle unconcerned about the world around him, simply eating, staring, and sleeping, there is something wrong with him. By the time he is a year old he should have made connections between the sight, sound, taste, smell, feeling, and constitution of most of the objects with which he has come in contact. Of course, the senses of a year-old child cannot make fine discriminations in objects, but still he can tell whether they will give him pleasure or pain. The development of his intelligence after the first year consists mainly in his discovering the qualities of objects through the different senses, organizing his data into ideas, and learning to what uses he can put the things about him. The Test of Intelligence. — Suppose a child could not make connections between the appear- ance of his bottle, as an example, and the pleas- ure to be derived from it. Well, then, he could not learn; his mind would be arrested in its de- velopment. If a child could not establish associa- tions between his experiences beyond his early years he would be an idiot. In institutions for defectives one can sometimes see persons who may be twenty years old in body but who may not be more than two years old in mind. Some misfortune overtook them when they were very young, so that they could not make further con- nections among their experiences ; and while their bodies went on growing, their intelligence stopped 16 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING right there. So a child's intelligence may stop developing at the third or fourth or fifth or fifteenth year while the body may go on growing. The more perfectly one can adapt himself to the world around him the more completely is his intelligence developed. Of course, this matter of adaptation is almost infinitely complex. Try to imagine all the details the child must learn about the objects around him in order to under- stand them. Take such a simple object as an apple, for instance. Consider all the details of form and color and quality which a cbild must be able to associate together in order to learn how he should deal with different varieties of apples in different stages of ripening or decay! Degree of Intelligence at Different Ages. — What degree of intelligence should a normal child exhibit at different stages of development? A six-months-old baby should extend his hands for his bottle when it is brought near him. He should respond to his mother's greeting when she smiles into his face, or gurgles or coos to arouse his expressions. If he is hungry and his bottle is brought and he makes no effort to grasp it; or if he does not respond to his mother's expressions, then he is not advancing as rapidly as he should do. In other words, he is not making the associations which are normal for a child of this age. He ought by this time to have learned the traits of a few familiar objects INTELLECTUAL TRAINING 17 SO that he will not act in the same way toward all of them. Suppose, for instance, you should have in your right hand a piece of wood, and in your left hand the child ^s bottle. If he is hungry, he should grasp for his bottle instead of the wood. If he does not gTasp for the latter but grasps for the former instead and attempts to satisfy his hunger mth it, he is retarded in his mental development. One can make a number of tests like this on a ten- or twelve-months-old child. If he responds in the same way to a book that he does to his mother's face, he is not de- veloping properly. A child developing normally will reveal a con- stantly enlarging range of objects and situations to which he can adjust himself so as to gain pleas- ure from them and avoid pain. If his range of adaptation does not increase at any age, then his mental development is arrested at that point. If he falls down stairs when he is a year old, and if he does the same thing when he is two years old and three years old, he is not making progress mentally. If an eighteen-months-old child touches a stove and is burned five times, and if he pro- ceeds to touch it the sixth time, he is not devel- oping as he should ; his brain is not establishing connections among his experiences. At eighteen months of age associations of the type mentioned are established very quickly in the normal child's brain. 18 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING Instinct vs. Intelligence. — There are other kinds of associations, however, which are estab- lished much more slowly, mainly because of strong instincts which lead in a contrary direc- tion. For instance, an eighteen-month s- old child may grab for sugar at the table, and his mother may punish him, but he may do the same thing- to-morrow and the next day and the next day. He may be normal in his development; he may actually have made the connections between grabbing and the pain that results; but this in- stinct is so compelling that he may give way to it and later regret it. One may see a child of this age who is learning not to grab; he may reach out to grab, and then the memory of the penalty will rush forward, and he will draw back his hand before he has actually touched the sugar. There are numerous actions of this sort which may be observed in a typical eighteen-months-old child every day. They also may be observed later, but in more complex situations. Even in the university period one may occasionally see a student who starts to cheat in an examination, but who restrains himself before he has yielded fully to the temptation, because what he has learned relating to this matter comes to his rescue before his impulse gets the better of him. The development of intelligence, then, means in some part the building up of barriers against impulses, and establishing right attitudes toward INTELLECTUAL TRAINING 19 the things and the people in the world. He has learned best who has established the most asso- ciations between his impulses and the outcomes of indulging them. An intelligent adult has all his impulses under control so that he can regulate them according as his experiences have shown that they should be repressed or modified or given free rein. If such an individual should become drunk he would be thrown back to the condition of infancy and his impulses would get the better of him. II The Child's Memory. — A special word should be said regarding memory. The typical parent says to his young child perhaps twenty-five times a day, **Why didn't you do what I told you to doT' and the child responds, ^*I forgof The parent says, **How many times must I tell you before you remember T' and the child persists in trying to convince the parent that he meant to obey, but he could not remember to do so. You who are reading these lines, do you ever forget? If you are asked to mail a letter on the way to your work, do you always do it? If you are like most persons you frequently forget re- quests of this sort unless they are right in the line of your main interests. You may never forget a matter which bears directly upon your business or your profession or your social rela- tions, but whatever lies outside of what is really 20 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING important and vital in your life, as you view the subject, you frequently let slip. Nature intends you should do this; she has planned it so that a normal person will forget what does not seem to play a role in determining his welfare in one way or another. If people remembered everything that was said to them, and every experience, their minds would be cluttered with debris. Nature intends that much that comes in through one ear should go out through the other. That only will stick which can be used in one's business, so to speak. A physician may remember everything he has seen or heard which relates to the dis- eases he treats, but he may forget everything he has heard relating to legal matters, or teaching, or theology, or mechanics, or politics, or the weather. Every capable person, whether he be lawyer, or teacher, or engineer, or minister, or housekeeper does the same thing in principle. What a ChUd Rem^emhers, — Now take the young child. His memory will retain whatever relates to his dominant interests at any stage in his development. If his father promises him in the morning that he can go to a moving picture show in the afternoon he will not forget it. In psychological terms, this remains right in the focus of his consciousness all the time, because it is so vital to him; it is exactly the same in prin- ciple as when anything relating to disease keeps itself in the forefront of a physician's attention INTELLECTUAL TRAINING 21 SO that he cannot forget it. But if the feither asks his child to do an errand and he meets a playmate on the street, he may forget the errand completely. Why! Because to play with his companion is more directly related to his interests than to do the errand. Instantly he sees his com- panion, his consciousness becomes filled with ideas relating to play. Everything else is driven into the background. Anyone who understands child nature would be able to predict that this would happen in nine out of ten cases with nor- mal children. Take another example. A mother says to her five-year-old boy: ^^You may play on the lawn this forenoon while I am at the Club, but I do not want you to go across the street and play with Sammy Jones. Now be sure and do what I tell you. ^ ' What are the chances that the boy will remember? If Sammy Jones is a good com- panion, and if he calls across the street saying that he has something to show him, it is a safe guess that the boy will go. Even if in the past the mother has whipped him for leaving his lawn he will forget about it when Sammy Jones invites him to come over. Some parents whip their chil- dren every day for going to the neighbors. Such children may begin to cry when they are on their way home, because then they remember what is likely to happen to them, but when the impulse is on them to go over to the neighbors to gratify 22 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING their curiosity or to play with a companion everything else is crowded into the background. Still another case. A kindergartener says to her five-year-old children, '^You must not whis- per to anyone until I give you permission. Every child must pay attention to what he is doing, and not look at anyone else.'' How long can five- year-old children remember instruction of this sort? Not much longer than it takes to give it. As soon as the sound of the teacher's voice has died away, and the children are not looking at her, and unless they are busily engaged on an interesting task, their desire to communicate will surge into the focus of consciousness, and in a few minutes most of them will be practically cer- tain to whisper to their companions. A wise kindergartener would rarely make a request of this kind unless she could hold the attention of her children during the period when she wished them not to look at others or whisper to them. Those w^ho have charge of young children should remember that the impulse to look at companions and communicate with them is very profound, and it will assert itself whenever children are not deeply interested in their own individual enterprises. Wht/ Adults Misunderstand Children. — We adults usually think children should remember instruction which we could keep in mind our- selves. If an adult were asked not to communi- INTELLECTUAL TRAINING 23 cate with a companion lie could keep the matter in his attention for a considerable period, be- cause all his experience has made him appreciate the importance of remembering such instructions. And then, the impulse to communicate is not so strong in an adult as it is in a child, so that it is not likely to gain the upper hand in his conscious- ness. But a parent will often forget experiences which his child will remember, such as places visited, jingles learned, and so on. If the child should turn 'round and criticise the parent be- cause he forgot, the latter would think he was dealt with unjustly. He would say, *^It is not important that I should retain these things. I am not interested in them. I do not want to re- member them.'' He would be justilSed in taking this attitude, but it is not so easy for him to see that the child is sometimes justified in not re- membering commands which the parent issues. Practical Suggestions. — Grown people ought not to issue so many instructions to children as they ordinarily do. But when it is necessary to give a command the parent and the teacher should see to it that the child thoroughly ap- preciates it and associates it with some event which will enable him to remember it. Often he is so busy with his enterprises that he does not hear what is said to him. Suppose he is playing a vigorous game with a companion, and the mother calls out to him, ^*I want you to come in 24 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING in five minutes/' The chances are that he does not really hear what is said, or at least it does not take a firm hold on his attention, even though he replies, *^Yes, I will come/' His answer is mechanical. It is practically certain he will not remember to go in in five minutes. A young child cannot judge the flight of time anyway, even when he is not otherwise engaged ; but when he is absorbed in play, time does not exist for him, — it is annihilated under such conditions. The parent mentioned above made a mistake in not having the boy stop his play long enough so that what was said to him could get into the focus of his attention. Then she should have helped him to measure the flight of time by say- ing, for instance, — *^As soon as you knock the ball once more you run in,'' or, **Just as soon as you tag Sammy Jones remember to come in." A parent must make a clear and impressive con- nection between a command of this sort and a given act. It is of particular importance to keep in mind that when commands are thrown out into the air at a child who is busy in any enter- prise, there is very little likelihood that they will be carried out, because they really do not get into his consciousness. Impressing Commands. — Suppose a child has been told not to pull coals from the grate onto the carpet. One of the deepest impulses of children is to jjlay with fire, and they are likely INTELLECTUAL TRAINING 25 to forget instructions to let it alone. Can they be made to remember not to pull out the coals? The first step is to impress them with the danger involved. A parent might pull out coals and let them begin to burn on an old piece of carpet which can be used for this purpose. It Avould be desirable to have a blaze actually start up and frighten the child. The parent could then say, **Our house will burn down if you ever pull out coals.'' An experience of this sort would prob- ably deeply affect a child three years of age, and if he should start to pull out coals at any time the sight of burning carpet would flash into his mind and restrain him. There are other ways in which a parent could make the connection be- tween coals and danger if he would take the time for it. One such lesson might permanently re- strain a child from playing in a dangerous way with fire. But simply to say to a child, **I don't want you to play with fire," will probably be useless in most cases. Whipping him if he touches the fire may work successfully occasionally, but it will fail in many instances. A burned child will fear the fire, but a whipped child may not think about it. The Treatment of a Bad M&niory. — Will pun- ishment help a child to remember! Take the case of a child who is constantly bringing mud into the house on his shoes. If he is whipped will he 26 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING remember to rub off the mud before he comes in? Take a hundred children chosen at random, and some of them will make the connection between the whipping and bringing mud into the house. Probably the majority of them will not be great- ly helped by the whipping. Doubtless some of the readers of these lines can bear evidence to this fact. In some homes children are whipped or slapped several times every day because they bring in mud on their shoes. A better way would be to require a child to sweep out the mud when- ever he brings it in; to have him suffer the nat- ural consequences of thoughtlessness will be more effective than whipping him, as a rule. A better way still would be to place a shoe scraper in front of the steps so prominent that when the child steps on it he can hardly help but think what it is for. Many domestic tragedies would be avoided if parents would think of devices which would automatically suggest the acts they wish their children to perform. The fact is we all tend to rely upon mere commands, and these com- mands relate to actions which are of importance to us, and which we can remember, but which are not of importance to the child, and so he is likely to forget them. Ill Touch is the Primary Sense. — In the develop- ment of intelligence the senses play the leading INTELLECTUAL TRAINING 27 role in the early years. The sense of touch is the mother of all the senses. There was a time in the evolution of mind when there was no sense but that of touch. Sight has been built out of and dependent upon the sense of touch, and the same is true of hearing, taste, and smell, f If the sense of touch should be destroyed in an infant, it is doubtful if the other senses would develop, and it is practically certain that his intelligence would remain rudimentary. In this connection, it should be said that the muscular sense — the sense that gives impressions of weight and the constitution of things, what their resistance is, and what they can do to an individual — this sense is directly associated with the sense of touch as found in the hand. Those who teach the feeble- minded appeal primarily to the sense of touch and the muscular sense, for in no other way can a backward intelligence be effectively stimulated. Let any reader who has not done so put this question to himself: ^'What does it mean to under stcmd a thing!" He will discover that it means possessing knowledge of what uses a thing- can be put to, or how it will affect one. Really, what one needs to know about the world and all the things therein is how they can serve him, and how they will respond when he acts this way or that. Nature practically compels the normal child to experiment with things in order to answer these questions — ^^How are they consti- 28 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING tutedf What can I do with them? What will they do to me?" The greater the number of cor- rect answers an individual can give to these ques- tions regarding the objects in the world, the more intelligent he is. Further, the more efficient a parent or teacher is in assisting a child to gain vital answers to these questions, the better in- structor he is. Nature says to the normal child, ^* Experiment with every new thing you can find. Look at it. Make what sounds you can with it. Put it in your mouth, and see whether you can find out anything about it in this way. But whatever else you do with it, don't fail to handle it. Try whether it will bound or roll, or whether it can be toppled over. Don't leave anything new^ until you have experimented with it in all these ways, and until you have tested it in other ways if you can think of any.'' So when a twelve- or fifteen-months-old child begins to go about the house on his own initia- tive, he proceeds to obey nature's command, and he tests everything he can find anywhere. Sup- pose, now, that the mother restrains him so that he will not get into trouble or disarrange the household. Suppose she does not provide him with objects with which he can experiment. The more she limits her child, the more she handicaps him in his struggle to learn the world -in which he must live. One thin^' is certain: he cannot INTELLECTUAL TRAINING 29 learn it by looking at it simply or listening to words that adnlts may use to describe it. ■ It is difficult for many adults to appreciate this fact. They can understand things and get pleas- ure from them without handling them. Moreover, they can acquire knowledge about objects when others describe them, or when they read about them. But such people forget that they first had to have real, first-hand experience before they could ever understand or enjoy anything or use words regarding it. They forget also that they often have serious deficiencies in their own knowl- edge because they were handicapped in early childhood in dealing with the world around them. How the City Interferes with Development, — This is particularly true of people brought up in the city where there are limitations of every kind. It is believed to-day by those who study such things that the child who spends his whole time in the city is likely to suffer from defects in in- telligence in mature years, unless parents and teachers make special efforts to counteract the retarding influence of the environment. Unfor- tunately, the typical city house is furnished to meet the pride and convenience of adults, and there is almost nothing in it which can be han- dled or used by the young. Madame Montessori appreciated the situation in the modern city, and she devised her simple apparatus with a view to training the child's senses and providing him 30 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING with facilities for constructive activities. The praise which has been given the Montessori sys- tem has come from persons who have felt the limitations of the home, and who have observed the effect upon the child's intelligence and also upon his disposition of having something to do, as provided for by the Montessori system. A civil engineer who employs a large number, of college boys each year to go with him into the mountainous regions of the West, said recently that hereafter he would take only boys who had received their early training on the farm, or at least in the country, because he has found that boys who have been born and bred in the city are, with rare exceptions, not as resourceful as those brought up in the country. City boys seem not to be able to deal with original situations as well as farm boys. The former are more or less help- less whenever they have a new problem to solve, while the latter apply themselves to it, and usually find some solution for it. Why should there be this difference? Principally because city life to-day tends to deprive children of the opportunity and the necessity of doing things for themselves. City life is organized without refer- ence to the need of making children self-helpful. There is little for them to do that demands appli- cation or originality. In the majority of homes there is nothing of any sort for children to do on their own initiative. The home is conducted so INTELLECTUAL TRAINING 31 that most of its activities are looked after by hired help; in many cases, children do not have to dress themselves even. Training of this sort during the early years must result in mental and perhaps physical flabbiness. IV Training for Self -Help fulness. — This principle applies all the way along in the child's training. When he begins to read, write, spell and cipher, whether he starts in the home or in the school, his advancement will depend almost entirely upon the skill of the mother or teacher in leading him to take every step for himself. Suppose, for in- stance, the child is writing a sentence, and he wants to use the word ^'hand.'' It seems un- familiar to him, and he calls out to his mother, ''How do you spell 'hand'!" What will the mother do if she is a competent teacher of her child! Will she dictate the spelling? She will not. The easiest way, of course, is to tell the child outright; but it is the worst way so far as the development of self-helpfulness and intelli- gence are concerned. A competent mother will guide the child to spell the word largely by his own effort, if it is at all possible for him to do so. She will have him sound the word, so that each element in it will stand out in his attention. Then she will lead him to connect the proper letters with the sounds he has analyzed. She will simply 32 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING question and stimulate him but not tell him. She will not question him either more than is neces- sary to have him solve his problem. It might be enough for her simply to ask him to sound the word slowly, and he may then discover how it is to be spelled. There are several hundred opportunities every day in the typical home for the parent or older brother or sister to stimulate the child to be original and self-helpful. Take a five-year-old who asks his mother why pieces of paper dropped over the register fly upward. The mother may respond, ** Because hot air rises,'' and let it go at that. This would be bad teaching. What should the mother do I If she cannot stop to have her child make a little experiment in which he will see that when he lights a match or a candle or builds a fire the smoke goes upward, then she will ask him to hold his hand over the register, and feel the air beating up against it. She will have him ascertain where this air comes from. She will ask him to go down into the cellar, and discover the pipe that furnishes the air, and find out where it leads to, and see from where it starts. If she could take one minute for the task, she could make him see the connection between the fresh-air intake and the hot air which he feels. He could put some fragrant thing in the current of air at the fresh-air intake, and then run up- stairs and catch it as it comes out of the register. INTELLECTUAL TRAINING 33 He would then have traced the air from the be- ginning and would have made the connection between the phenomenon that interested him and its cause, and thus he would gain a real under- standing of it. The typical child from two to five or six prob- ably does not comprehend more than one out of every hundred answers which are made to the questions he asks, because the answers are abstract and unintelligible. The Role of Play. — It is fortunate for the de- velopment of the child's intellect, as well as for his physical development, that he is endowed with uncontrollable impulses to play. What would be- come of a child brought up in a modem city, in a home in which all the activities are looked after by servants, who had no desire to play? He would doubtless be feeble-minded, because there would be no incentive for his mind to unfold. I The more active a child is in his play, the greater are the possibilities for his mental devel- opment. Of course, he must have opportunities for varied play activities; and the range of his play must be increased as Jie develops. A child who could never play anything but wood tag, for in- stance, would be handicapped in his development as compared with a child who could play twenty- five different games with diiferent groups and numbers of players. Further, the child who is provided with a sandpile, and especiallj^ with \ 34 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING tools with which to make objects, even thougii very crude, who has dolls to dress, etc., has a tremendous advantage over a child who has nothing of this sort. A child who has oppor- tunities to climb trees, to make kites and fly them, to shoot with a bow and arrow, to throw stones with a sling, and so on, is certain to develop better than a child who can play now^here except on a city street, or who is confined to his house and can play only card games, say, with adults. Training in ConcenU^ation.^- Intelligence de- velops by gaining impressions of objects, organ- izing them together into ideas, and using these to interpret new situations and to help the indi- vidual to adjust himself thereto. The highest success in this activity requires concentration. Take two children three years of age. One is distracted by everything that happens around him. He flits from one thing to another inces- santly during waking life, so that he does not stay with any one thing long enough to have the impressions concerning it become definitely estab- lished and organized. Then take the other child. He holds himself to anything that interests him or that he is doing until it really settles into his system, as it were. Under such conditions, the impressions will persist, and they will fuse to- gether in a natural way. The latter child will learn rapidly; he will make constant progress in intelligence, while the former will progress very INTELLECTUAL TRAINING 85 slowly. The difference between them is due primarily to a difference in concentration. Un- fortunately modern city life tends constantly toward distraction. So much is happening around children that many of them cannot hold themselves to their tasks long enough for ideas and responses to become established. Here is indicated one of the vital problems of the home — to protect its children against the incessant appeal of the world outside. There ought to be effective community co-operation so that in every home there would be hours in which the children would be applying themselves to tasks of some sort. If American homes can- not build barriers against these distractions, we will be unable to develop those habits of concen- tration and application in the young which are absolutely essential for sound intellectual develop- ment. CHAPTER II FIRST STEPS IN HEALTH TRAINING A large proportion of children never reach school age. Most of them die of diseases that could be easily prevented. Many of the discom- forts of the early years of childhood are due to aches and pains which are caused by wrong habits of life. The first concern then of any parent should be so to train his children that they may become able to resist the physical ailments which handicap them in their development, and make life a burden to themselves and to those who care for them. ' Dietetic Habits of Chief Importan<^e. — Nature intends that during the first three months a child should do little else than eat and sleep. If he feeds at his mother's breast the problem of food is not likely to be a serious one. When he is limited to this bill-of-fare he will rarely over- eat, but he will get enough food if the mother can provide it. Sometimes a mother's milk does not contain the proper elements ,of food in the 36 HEALTH TRAINING ♦ 37 right proportion, and tlie child will reveal this by failing to gain in weight, and he may cry a good deal, thus showing that his food is not being digested and assimilated, whatever the cause may be. The chief trouble is likely to be the familiar colic. This difficulty is not always due to lack of balance in the elements of food, or to an excess or deficiency of food. It may be due to the body becoming chilled in bathing or in the cradle, or to heavy, close wrapping which prevents escape of heat and moisture. A new-born child is easily chilled because the skin has not been trained to resist changes in temperature, and then digestive difficulties are certain to follow. Also, if the body be kept wrapped so that the surplus heat and moisture cannot escape, reflex nervous disturb- ances will result, and the digestion and assimila- tion of food are the first processes to be affected. When a child is continually crying with colic, then, the cause should be sought not only in the food, but also in the manner of bathing and in the clothing. Different Uses of Food. — ■ The purpose of food is to supply materials for building up the body, to furnish heat for warming it, and to give energy to support mental and muscular action. The body is built from minerals that are required for the bony structures, and albumin or protein which is required for flesh. The minerals are derived from milk, grains, meat, eggs, potatoes, and such 38 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING vegetables as spinach. The albumin is derived in large measure from eggs, meat, peas, beans, milk and cheese. It is found in just about the right proportion in all the grains — wheat, corn, oats, rye. The proportion differs a little in the differ- ent grains, but the difference is not very great. The heat required to warm the body and the energy needed for action of any kind are derived mainly from fats, starch, and sugar, though in case of necessity even the albumin or protein may furnish heat and energy. Different Foods for Different Ages. — It is im- portant for a parent to try to work out a bill- of-fare for a child which will be best adapted to his needs at different periods in his development. It will not be possible in this chapter to go into details; any parent can secure from the Depart- ment of Agriculture at Washington free bulletins, particularly one written by Caroline F. Hunt, which will be found helpful in choosing and pre- paring food for young children. But there are certain general rules which can be given here. Milk should be the main food of a child up until the appearance of the teeth, of course. It should be the most important element of his food up to the age of four or five, at any rate. The chief requirement is to see that the milk has the right proportion of butter fat, and is free from disease germs. Every community should help parents to secure good milk by requiring dairymen to deliver HEALTH TRAINING 39 milk up to standard in butter fat and free from tuberculosis, typhoid and other disease germs. Most progressive communities have laws govern- ing these requirements. It may be mentioned that skimmed milk has nourishment, but it is lacking in fat. If a parent cannot secure milk containing the required amount of cream, then the deficiency in fat must be made up by the use of butter, or olive oil, or butterine. Cream is the best fat for a young child, because it can be most easily digested and because it contains an abundant sup- ply of vitamines which are essential for nutrition. Butter must be worked back into something like cream — that is to say, it must be emulsified — ^be- fore it can be assimilated, and the same is true of olive oil and the like. The Bill-of-Fare When the Teeth Appear. — While milk must constitute the basis of the young child's dietary, it would not do to have children live upon it entirely after the teeth come. Upon the appearance of the teeth nature intends that they shall be used in grinding foods that require chewing. When the teeth develop, changes occur in the alimentary system which make it possible for the child to digest meats, grains, and vegetables. Before the teeth appear the system cannot manufacture the juice necessary to digest these foods. When the teeth are cut a child ought every day to have some hard, rough food with his milk. Children who are fed on soft 40 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING foods which require no chewing are at a disad- vantage in various ways. The teeth will decay the more readily because Nature will not main- tain the vigor of organs unless they are put to their proper uses. Further, mushes and other soft grain foods contain starch which cannot be well taken care of if it passes to the stomach as starch. It ought to be acted upon first by juices developed in the mouth in chewing. These juices convert the starch into dextrin and this can be acted upon effectively by the juices in the stomach and farther along. So as early as possible chil- dren should eat crusts of bread, zwieback, or bread toasted until it is hard. There are a number of varieties of cereal foods on the market that re- quire vigorous chewing before they can be swal- lowed. Certain of these foods contain the whole grain, either corn or wheat, and so they make good food for children. A child ought every day to have some cereal food with bran in it, because this element is needed as a mechanical stimulant in the digestive tract. Children who are fed on soft starchy foods without bran are apt to suffer from in- activity of the intestines, and then all sorts of trouble are likely to follow. The wastes and poisons which ought to be regularly eliminated may be retained in the system. Some children are in what physicians call a toxic condition most of the time. That is to say, wastes that should HEALTH TRAINING 41 be got rid of through the eliminative organs are retained and absorbed, and they cause headaches, skin eruptions, colds, and many of the other every-day afflictions of the young. It is safe to say that no child can keep well who does not eliminate these wastes regularly; this is the first law of health. Nature would take care of the matter properly if the child's bill-of-fare con- sisted in some part of hard foods containing bran and requiring vigorous chewing. Vegetables in which there is a considerable amount of cellulose matter will give bulk to the contents of the intes- tines, and this is highly desirable. Also stewed com containing the husk is valuable as a food and as a mechanical stimulant to the eliminative organs. Ripe fruits supply acids which are very essential for proper digestion and elimination. A child ought every day to have an apple, an orange, or some other ripe fruit. Apples and oranges are better for most children than any other fruit. Nature appears to lead the typical child to consume the whole of an apple, including skin and core, and his instinct is a wise guide. Sugar Shovld he Used Sparingly. — One of the chief difficulties with children's diet is the excess use of sugar. Sugar taken on an empty stomach is an irritant to the digestive system and often to the nervous system. In modem life children con- sume an excess of sugar in their foods and espe- cially in the form of candies. With right train- 42 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING ing from the beginning very little sugar will be needed in foods. All cereal foods develop sweet- ness when properly chewed. It is better for health to make foods tasty by masticating them than by sweetening them artificially. If a child from the beginning does not eat candy between meals and but little of it at any time, he will not develop a craving for it. He will be satisfied with the amount of sugar used in the ordinary cooking of food. The free use of ripe, sweet fruits will satisfy the passion for sweets to a large extent. Young children who get into the habit of eat- ing a lot of sugar on cereals or in puddings, and so on, or who are given much candy, are likely to develop finicky habits in regard to food. They are quite apt not to masticate food thoroughly in order to make it agreeable to the taste; they come to rely upon artificial flavoring rather than upon thorough mastication. One sees children of this kind who will eat only the soft part of bread, who will not eat any cereals unless they are cov- ered with sugar, who must have maple syrup or honey or some other sweetening upon cakes and waffles, who live largely on cake and cookies. They will not eat any fruits unless they are highly sweetened. They often turn up their noses at eggs, potatoes, and all vegetables which are not sweetened. No Condiments in a Child's Food. — The case HEALTH TRAINING 43 is aggravated when condiments are used, snch as salt, pepper, and the like. Appetite should never be thus artificially stimulated in a child. If he will not eat potatoes or meat or vegetables without the use of condiments, it is evidence that he is not living a healthy life. When appetite fails a child it is Nature's sign that either the food is not adapted to his needs, or he is not exercising enough to acquire a taste for whole- some food, or he is not eliminating poisons. A healthy child whose taste is unspoiled will thor- oughly enjoy bread which is not highly flavored or sweetened. He will like potatoes without pepper. It will not be necessary to put sauces of any kind on his meats. In short, the less flavoring the better in a child's foods. When they are highly seasoned he is likely to over-eat. There is an artificial stimulation which leads the child beyond reasonable bounds in his eating. A healthy child, living an active life, has a vigor- ous appetite anyway, and it should not be excited by any article the purpose of which is principally to stimulate. Over-eating. — Some children habitually over- eat, even when the food is not artificially sea- soned. A child in the country who is out-of-doors and muscularly active most of his waking life is not very apt to over-eat. People in the country, children especially, do not eat as much ordinarily as children in towns and cities, for the reason 44 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING that there is not so much and so great a variety of food and it is not made so tempting. Over- eating is a potent source of digestive disorders and ^^ colds'' in young children in the city. A child who is over-fed is in a good condition to take any disease which may be in the air at the time. Parents often force food on their children under the illusion that the more a child eats the better it will be for him. One often sees city children who have but little muscular activity, and Nature reduces their appetite as a protec- tion. They may often not wish any breakfast, or they will leave the table at luncheon or dinner before all the courses have been completed. Then their parents begin to worry about them, and urge them to take more food than they care for. This is all wrong. Nature is a much better guide in this matter than the typical parent, who fre- quently has himself formed habits of taking too much food, so that he may eat clear through a four- or five-course dinner when a very moderate indulgence in only two courses would be much better for him. Normally a young child will eat breakfast and be ready to take food at every meal. But if occasionally he says he is not hungry the parent ought on no account to urge him to eat more than he wishes. There is slight danger that a healthy child will be injured by abstinence when he has an opportunity to secure food. The danger HEALTH TRAINING 45 is generally on the other side in modem life, at least in the town and the city. This is especially the case when children are allowed to eat between meals, and to be nibbling most of the time. Making Children Too Fastidious. — ^When parents fuss over a child because he does not eat enough, he may sometimes develop the habit of not taking as much as he needs. This is due to a peculiar trait which psychologists call ** con- trary suggestion.'' If one should suggest to a certain type of child that he should go for a walk he would insist upon remaining at home, whereas if he should be asked to remain at home he would insist on taking a walk. He usually wants to do the opposite of what is suggested to him. Under certain conditions, every child will resist the domination of parents or governesses or teachers or even playmates. So when a parent keeps at a child because he does not eat potatoes, say, when he declares he does not like them, and when this takes place at every meal day after day, the child is apt to acquire a fixed idea against eating potatoes. If this continues long enough it may become almost abnormal so that the child develops a positive aversion to potatoes. Life-long antipathies to certain foods are ac- quired by this kind of training. A wiser course would be for a parent to make all the wholesome foods reasonably attractive, and then not to urge them on his child. If the 46 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING parent is afraid the child is not eating enough the proper way is to change his habits of living, to reduce his allowance of sugar and candy, to have him out-of-doors more than he is accus- tomed to be, working with his hands and playing vigorous games. Under such conditions Nature will create an appetite which will make all whole- some foods agreeable and even delicious. No one can make a child like an article by commanding him to eat it. On the contrary, the very fact that it is urged on him tends to make him feel that there is something about it which is disagree- able. This is true not only of food by of prac- tically all experiences. What one is compelled to do is likely to be looked upon as distasteful, and hostility to it may be engendered. Meat Not the Best Food for Children. — Parents often urge meat on their children thinking it is of especial value. There is a popular belief that meat is a strengthening food, and the more that is eaten of it the better. This is a serious error, particularly as it relates to young chil- dren. It would be better for children to have no meat at all than to have too much. And how much is too much? It is enough for a child under five or six years to have a moderate allowance of meat once every other day. Probably the best meat for young children is chicken or lamb, though there is not much choice between the meats found on the tables in American homes. HEALTH TRAINING, 47 Occasionally one finds a child who cannot readily digest duck or goose. But even with these chil- dren a moderate amount of either variety at in- frequent intervals is not likely to cause trouble. The principal thing to be guarded against is an excessive amount of flesh food. Meat is stimulat- ing to many children; when it is indulged in freely they are apt to be restless, sleepless, and easily irritated. A parent who is giving her four- oF five-year-old child meat three times a day, and who is complaining about his irritability, his bad temper, and his restlessness at night, ought to cut down his allowance to one quarter of what he has been accustomed to. In place of the meat the child should have an egg and an additional allowance of milk, both of which articles furnish albumin in a better form for young children than does meat. The white of egg is very rich in albimain, and the yolk is rich in fat. When both the yolk and the white are cooked to the consistency of jelly, but are not cooked hard, they can be readily digested by practically all children. Every mother should know how to cook eggs in a variety of ways, so that they will be palatable and digest- ible, and she should also know how to use them in puddings and the like; and when they are thus freely used in a child's dietary meat can be reduced to a minimum. Also in place of meat nuts should be used 48 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING freely. Salted peanuts, well chewed, can be readily digested by practically all children after they have cnt their teeth. Any of the familiar nuts, when roasted, can usually be easily digested and they are ordinarily greatly relished. They contain the essential elements of food in con- densed form. By a liberal use of eggs, milk, nuts, and the whole of wheat and corn in cereals and breads, meat can be dispensed with almost altogether. A child will be amply nourished without getting the waste material contained in meat. Stimulating Beverages. — It seems incredible, but sometimes parents give young children tea, coffee, cocoa, and coca cola. It is safe to say that no young child can develop healthfully who habit- ually drinks any of these. Many people think cocoa is a good food; but it contains an alkaloid stimulant, though in much less degree than any of the others mentioned. If cocoa be highly diluted with milk it can be used sparingly by a young child, but it would be better to take it in the middle of the day than at night. Children may be kept awake by drinking cocoa a,t bed-time, and then the parent wonders what is the matter with them. It sometimes happens, too, that even young children acquire the chocolate habit, and they eat an excessive amount and are restless, sleepless and irritable. The safer course for a parent would be to eliminate tea, coffee, and HEALTH TRAINING iO cocoa completely from a young- child 's dietary, and use milk instead. Investigations made upon school pupils who drink these beverages show that they are gen- erally deficient in their studies, and they are more difficult to manage. In a certain sense they are poisoned all the time. Some children can endure them better than others, but no child can endure them without some loss. A child does not need any of them. If a parent wishes to vary a child's beverage let her give him fruit juices — orange juice, sweet apple juice, weak lemonade, and the like. Fruit juices, if not taken in too concentrated a form, will be of ad- vantage in digestion, besides being palatable and refreshing. The digestion of food is a chemical process, and some of the fruit acids can be utilized in this process. In addition, fruit acids are stimulating to the eliminative organs, and so they assist the body to get rid of its wastes. II Hardening the Body, — An infant's skin is accustomed to a temperature of about 98 3/5 de- grees./ It must be kept at about this temperature for some time, so the bath should be 98 3/5 de- grees. ? The clothing should be warm enough to prevent chilling, but it should be porous. Loosely woven garments best protect the body from 50 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING chilling, and they permit of the escape of un- necessary heat and moisture. A parent should keep in mind that the body of a child is a sort of furnace, constantly generating heat for the pur- pose of keeping the body up to a temperature of 98 3/5 degrees. The skin is a regulator to pre- vent the loss of heat when needed, but also to allow for its radiation when it is not required. Ordinarily the body will demand more food when it is not well protected, so that it must generate a large amount of heat. Also it will reject food when it is over-protected so that food is not needed for the maintenance of heat. Through proper attention the body can gradually be trained so that it will adjust itself effectively to the conditions under which it must live. But the skin of the new-born child is not able to make adjustments to widely varying conditions, espe- cially in the matter of temperature, and so it must be specially protected. By the time the child is six months old, however, the temperature of the bath can be reduced one degree at a time ; and the hardening of the body should be begiin as early as this. It is best to have the bath always at a neutral temperature of 98 3/5 degrees when the child is first put into it, but to intro- duce a little cold water before he is taken out. By the time he is two years of age it should be possible for him to endure a temperature as low as 85 desrrees before he leaves his bath. A HEALTH TRAINING 51 healthy child should react beneficially to cold water gradually introduced. The mother should watch his reactions, and so long as they are all right the temperature should be reduced. By the time he is ^ve years of age he should be able to react to a temperature of 70 degrees before he leaves the bath. It is highly desirable to train the skin so that it will acquire the power of reacting to sudden changes in temperature; the chief reason many children have colds con- stantly is because their skin is not so trained. A child should not be kept in a room heated above 70 degrees after the first six or seven months. The body can be trained gradually to endure a lower temperature, until 65 degrees is reached. The mother can train the child ^s skin to react to an even lower temperature by giving him an air bath as well as a water bath every day. Whenever the child is being dressed or undressed the body can be exposed for a brief period, and vigorously rubbed with the hands in a temperature of 65 degrees or even a little lower. Following the water bath is a good time for training the skin to react to cool air. After the second year the child should rub his own body during the air bath. Of course, he should not be exposed until he becomes chilled; and he should not be suddenly exposed to a low temperature under any circumstances. There is no universal rule about this. Some 52 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING children can react more vigorously than others, and they will be benefited by a considerable period of exposure with vigorous rubbing. All children after the first year, unless they are sick, can profit by skin training so that sudden changes in temperature will not produce conges- tions and *^ colds.'' A further word about the bath: a vigorous five-year-old child should be able to take a moderately cold spray every morning. This is the best way to develop resistance to chills. Warm water, between 100 and 105 degrees should be poured or sprayed on the body first, and then the cold should be gradually intro- duced, until at the close of the bath the water should be between 60 and 65 degrees. A mother should carefully observe the reaction of her child to this vigorous treatment. If he comes out of the spray feeling well, if the skin reddens, if he shows that he has enjoyed the experience, then it is a most excellent tonic and skin disci- pline for him. But if he comes out shivering, if he does not seem happy, if the skin does not quickly redden, it is evidence that a less rigor- ous program must be followed. But an effort should be made to reduce the temperature grad- ually until it reaches 50 degrees. If the child cannot react to this temperature when the water comes through a spray then he may be able to do it when he is rubbed with a cold towel or HEALTH TRAINING , 53 wash cloth. This does not give as vigorous training as a spray; but a child who can react to this can be gradually built up so that he can endure the most vigorous form of bath. As early as practicable the child should himself manage the spray so that he will be active while he is taking it. The In-door Habit. — It is necessary in present- day American city life to train children spe- cially so they can react to varying conditions. Formerly most of the children lived in the country. To-day most of them live in towns and cities. They are in-doors much of the time now, whereas formerly they were out-of-doors. So Nature says to-day, **If a child is going to live in-doors there is no need of developing a vigorous skin and nervous mechanism that can resist sudden changes in temperature.^' The in-doors child then becomes adapted only to quite uniform temperature. If he grows up in this way to the age of five or six his skin, nerv- ous system, and vital organs will acquire the in-door habit, which is not easy to overcome. But the chances are that after the age of five the child will frequently expose himself to sud- den changes of temperature, and every time he has such an experience he will ^* catch a cold.'' He will be kept in the house until he recovers, when he will again expose himself, and back he will go to his bed again. Many American chil- 54 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING dren to-day catch something or other every time they are exposed because they have not been hardened by proper training. The time to begin this training is during the early years. The Out-door Habit. — The hardening of the body can be promoted by keeping the child out in the open much of the time, and without being too heavily clothed. A vigorous child after the age of three or four, who has had some skin training in the manner indicated above, might very well run out-doors on a crisp day without hat or coat, provided that while he is out he is constantly active, and provided also that he is not perspiring when he goes out. Many parents do not allow their children to go out-of-doors at any time without being wrapped up, and so they do not develop any hardihood. Of course, the matter must be determined on the basis of the child's ability to resist sudden changes in temperature. It is certain that a fragile child who has been accustomed only to warm rooms, and who has had no hardening, ought not to take the chance of running out without being well protected. But such a child will be heavily handicapped in later life. Nature will not de- velop vigorous vital processes and adaptability to changes when there is no need for this sort of thing. She never develops a power unless it is needed. If she does develop it, and it is not utilized, she will get rid of it. If one HEALTH TRAINING 55 should tie up his arm for six months his muscles would atrophy. Nature would say, **What is the use of keeping muscles that are not usedf In the same way Nature will not develop a body that can react to rigorous conditions if during the early years the child is prevented from hav- ing any vigorous experience. Some of the ancient people understood this, and they put their children through hardening processes. Undoubtedly their training was rather too heroic in some instances, with the result that the weaker children were eliminated. We think we ought to save all children to-day, and by proper training we can develop most of them so they can survive the experiences of present-day American life, and live in reasonable comfort and freedom from disease. Ill Children Are Edsily Over -excited^- — Young- children are usually very sensitive to sounds or movements of any kind. Most mothers realize that when their babes are asleep they must be careful not to make a noise near them. The child's nervous system seems to be constructed on the hair-trigger plan. Observe a group of grown people and children together. If there is any excitement it will be noted that it has a more marked effect upon the children than upon 56 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING the adults. The latter can ignore many of the noises and movements occurring about them, but it is otherwise with the young child. One fre- quently sees babes, especially in cities, who are constantly over-excited. They show in their irritability, in the readiness with which they cry, in the tense expression of their faces, in their inability to sleep restfully, and often in disturbances of nutrition, that the nervous sys- tem is overwrought. If this continues through- out childhood it is certain to lead to serious con- sequences. Not only will such a child tend to become neurotic and so suffer from every kind of ill in maturity, but he will be likely not to get his full growth. Anything which will disturb nutrition will interfere with growth. City Life Is Likely to Over-excite Children. — City life is exciting for persons of all ages, but particularly so for young people. The city is full of noises and movement. The advent of the automobile has contributed to the restlessness of the city. Children can hardly fail to be aroused too much by the constant swift move- ment and the noise made by the automobile, as well as by other exciting and over-stimulating agencies. Medical examiners in cities find a considerable proportion of children suffering from marked nervous disturbances. They are in such a tense state that they feel ill-at-ease when they go to the country or any quiet place. HEALTH TRAINING 57 This is found to be the case in large cities throughout the world. In some of the cities in the Old World as many as a third of the chil- dren early show nervous irregularities such as St. Vitus' Dance and the like. We are not quite so bad in this country yet, but there is no reason wliy we should not become so unless we can protect children from the nerve racking experi- ences of the city. Reducing Nervous Strain in the City. — One way to reduce the nervous strain and stress of the city is to provide public playgrounds away from the excitement of the street. If every home could have a playground of its own, where young children might spend much of their time, it w^ould help to protect them fi'om nervous over- strain. A big sandpile in a back yard is a vastly better place for a child than a city street; in the latter place he has constantly to be on the alert lest he be run down by a street car or an automobile or a horse. If to the sandpile could be added a swing, a trapeze, and a climbing lad- der, a child would rarely want to go on the street. Better still, if there could be space enough for three or four children to play ball, or tag, or racing games there would not be much danger that they would become over- stimulated. A parent, who has the welfare of his children chiefly in view, might better have a small house with a playground in the rear, than 58 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING a big house set on a busy street with no quiet place for his children to play. In some homes children are, over-stimulated by the older members of the family, and by the neighbors who come in to visit. It some- times happens also that a young child has a brother who likes to tease. The baby may be kept in a constant state of excitement and irrita- tion because of the brother's annoying atten- tions. Not infrequently one comes across a home in which there is a dog that barks a good deal. This is likely to excite young children too greatly, so that at night they will be irritable, restless, and sleepless. When this goes on day after day, nervous strain will be almost sure to follow. Again, there are homes in which chil- dren are kept keyed up nervously by friends who insist upon paying them too much atten- tion. A parent ought to arrange it so that visitors will leave their young children alone, not even speaking to them as a rule. The more completely visitors leave children to their own devices the better it will be for them — not only for their nervous and physical well-being, it may be said, but also for their social training. ^ Sleep as a Restorer of Nervous Health. — A child cannot develop in a healthful way nerv- ously unless he forms regular habits with re- spect to sleep. A healthy infant sleeps most of the time. A child a year old ought to sleep HEALTH TRAINING 59 eighteen or twenty hours out of the twenty-four. A five-year-old child should sleep sixteen hours every day. The more exciting the environment in which the child lives the greater is the need for sleep to counteract over-strain and restore nervous vigor. Unfortunately the conditions which over-excite children make it difficult for them to secure restful sleep. 'Noise is always a disturbing factor. Experiments show that even when a person, a child especially, is accustomed to a noise he still shows some disturbance when it is made while he is sleeping. He may not be- come fully awake, but he will be partly aroused, and so he will not gain full benefit from his sleep. This requires that a parent should do everything reasonable to preserve quiet while his children are sleeping. Sleeping rooms should be away from noisy streets. They should be removed as far as possible from living rooms and all sources of noise or excitement of any kind. ^ Conditions That Disturb Sleep.-^ Quite fre- quently young children are unable to sleep soundly even in a quiet environment because the breathing passages are obstructed by adenoid tissue or enlarged tonsils, and it seems that the proportion of children who suffer from these difficulties is constantly increasing. If a child breathes through the mouth in sleeping it is stron^: evidence of adenoids: if the mouth is 60 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING kept open during the waking hours it is con- clusive evidence. Usually a child so afflicted cannot sleep restfully. He will struggle during the night to get his breath. When he falls asleep the nervous system relaxes and the adenoid tissue obstructs the breathing passages. This is disastrous to health, particularly to the de- velopment of nervous vigor. Enlarged tonsils may have much the same effect as adenoids, and they are also apt to become foci for the develop- ment of toxins. A child suffering from either of these troubles ought to have them remedied as early as possible. A child may also be kept in an irritable, sleep- less condition because of pressure of developing teeth upon nerves. When a child is cutting teeth there is likely to be some disturbances of this kind. When the parent can arrange for it he should have an X-ray picture taken of his children's jaws when the teeth are coming through. This picture will sometimes show con- ditions in the development of the teeth which are certain to produce nervous disturbances. When the source of the irritation is discovered it is generally poss^ible to remove it, but with- out the X-ray picture it is often difficult to locate it. Every up-to-date dentist should be equipped with facilities for making X-ray pic- tures of the teeth, for in no other way can some of the most serious difficulties be discovered. HEALTH TRAINING 61 IV Neglect of an Important Health Factor. — There has recently been much discussion of the hygienic care of the eye, the ear, the throat, the lungs, and the nervous and digestive systems, but not much attention has been given to the hygiene of the locomotive apparatus, and espe- cially the foot. As these lines are being written, however, the newspapers are reporting that several organizations working for the improve- ment of the health of our people are starting a campaign to reforai our customs in dressing the feet. They are aiming especially to have the young, as well as older persons, see the neces- sity of wearing shoes which do not prevent the feet from performing one important func- tion — the protection of the body against shock in walking or running. Again, it is just beginning to be appreciated that health depends in considerable measure upon posture. Much attention has been aroused by Alexander's recent book, ^^ Man's Supreme Inheritrnce, ' ' in which he ascribes health and the control of animal habits very largely to posture. He maintains that man can free him- self from his animal inheritance only as he de- velops conscious control of his muscles and as- sumes a posture which will stimulate and sus- tain the higher emotions. It has long been /^ 62 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING known that the posture one assumes has an in- fluence upon his ethical and moral attitudes. If one habitually assumes a slouchy attitude he will develop a slouchy disposition. If he as- sumes an attitude of fear he will develop a timid, shrinking disposition. On the contrary, if he. takes the attitude of courage, his courage- ous emotions will gain control over his fears. And so on throughout the whole range of one's feelings and ethical attitudes. Posture Affected by the Development of the Foot, — The development of the foot plays an important part in posture. A flat foot, a broken arch, a contracted foot base, all play an im- portant role in leading one to assume an un- heal thful posture. If any one doubts this, let him experiment with himself in the matter of the height of the heel of his shoes. If he has been accustomed to wear shoes with low heels and then if he changes to high heels he will notice a marked effect upon the whole postural system; and the effect will be marked, though different, if he changes from high to low heels. In the same way if he could make a sudden change from an arched to a flat foot he would be impressed with the relation of the arch to posture. Nature has so constructed the foot that it will support the body on the heel and the ball when the body is held in a plumb line, and it HEALTH TRAINING 63 will serve as a shock absorber in walking or running. In designing the instep Nature used seven rounded bones; and she used five slender bones for the ball of the foot and fourteen bones for the toes. There is a good deal of play in these bones, more in the foot of a baby than in the foot of the adult; but in a foot that has not been mistreated there should be plasticity to the end of life. And plasticity is necessary in order that the nervous system and vital organs may be protected from harmful shock in walking. Life in the City Gives Rise to a New Prob- lem. — This latter point should be more fully appreciated by practically all parents than it seems to be. Most persons do all their walking on cement or hard surfaces. But when the human organism was developed there were no hard surfaces. Men walked on the soft earth. Even so, nature built the foot so that the shock of walking would be broken by the arches. But now when we all walk on very hard surfaces, it is of special importance that the natural con- struction and plasticity of the foot should be preserved. If the arch is broken or if a shoe is worn which prevents it from playing its role as a shock absorber, the entire organism will suffer to a greater or less degree. If the readers of these lines who have an experimental turn of mind will observe people walking on cement sidewalks or even on floors 64 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING in houses, they will discover that in some cases every mobile part of the body shakes. Suppose this occurs for four or five hours during the day. What condition will the walker be in at night? The chances are that he will be nervous, irritable, and he may suffer actual distress in organs that have been enduring shocks through- out the day. There are two arches in a baby's foot; one at the instep with which every parent is familiar and a less conspicuous one in the ball of the foot. As the baby develops the arch at the instep becomes more marked. As intimated above, the baby's foot is very pliable; the toes can be managed almost as well as the fingers, though the big toe cannot be coordinated with the other toes as the thumb can be with the fingers. Now, the arches and the pliability of the foot can be preserved only by wearing shoes built on the natural lines of the foot. This re- quires that the heels must be low, and the shank must be straight so that if you put the two shoes together they Avill touch throughout the inner line. The toe of the shoe must be broad so as not to compress the toes of the foot. Care should be taken to protect the child's foot from bunions or calluses, which are really deformi- ties, and which are often a source of pain. Bunions and calluses are evidence that ill-fitting shoes have been worn. They have rubbed the Through games and plays children learn to adapt themselves to one anothor. Thoy g-ain thpir most valuable social lessons In this way. Children are boi-n actors. Thoy learn the world in which they live larg-ely by imitation, and they should have opportunities for dramatization. HEALTH TRAINING 65 skin at prominent points and nature has sought to develop a protection by thickening the skin at these points. Girls Are the Chief Sufferers. — Unfortun- ately, girls have suffered more from unhygienic shoes than have boys. The physical examinations of young women upon entering high school and college has shown that a large proportion of them have mis-shapen feet due to the wearing of high heels, pointed toes, and very tight shoes throughout. We have condemned the Chinese because they deliberately deform their girls' feet, but we do something of the same sort of thing in our country, though we do not go to such extremes as the Chinese do. One often hears girls say that if they did not w^ear high-heeled, stiff-shanked shoes the arches of their feet would break. This may be true with persons who have long worn such shoes. The muscles of the arches are strong enough to protect the arch from collapsing provided the muscles are exercised properly from childhood through youth and into adult life; but when the muscles are not used, then, of course, they de- teriorate. If one should not use the muscles of his arm for a year they would atrophy. If one should lie in bed for six months he could not stand at the end of that time. In the same way the muscles of the feet will become weak if they are not used. It is absurd, though, for one to 66 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING say that the support of hig-h-heelecl, stiff- shanked shoes is needed for an arch that has not been misused throughout childhood and youth. One can heartily commend the growing prac- tice of wearing resilient rubber on the heels and even on the soles of shoes. No matter how low the heel of a shoe may be, it is impossible to eliminate all shock in walking on cement and hardwood surfaces unless the heel is made of yielding material. In purchasing shoes parents should give preference to those that promise to protect the wearer most effectively from shock, while at the same time protecting him from the cold and wet. These hygienic qualities can be found in shoes that are trim and artistic. Habits That Weaken Resistance. — The fol- lowing letter from a New York woman presents a problem which is troubling a large proportion of the people in this country: **In my family there is something wrong. In my father's family there were eleven who lived to a good age; in my husband's father's family there were seven; in his mother's family there were eight, all strong and vigorous. Their parents evidently got along well with their work, while I am often overtaxed in caring for HEALTH TRAINING 67 three children, none of whom are any too strong. I see the same condition of affairs around me, even though families are growing smaller. Cannot someone find the trouble and the remedy? The doctors say ^get more fresh air, sleep with open windows, eat simple foods.' At the same time we may look around and see foreigners with as large families as ours used to be, crowded into small, poorly ventilated shacks, eating the poorest of unhygienic food. For in- stance, an Italian babe may be quieted with an ear of green corn that would give ours the colic, and yet they are strong and vigorous.^' Nature is economical. She husbands her energies carefully in constructing a human being as in all her other undertakings. She will not develop or maintain large muscles, far instance, when an individual does not need to use them. She will not keep the teeth in repair if they are not required to grind hard, coarse food. She will not maintain a system of vigor- ous internal organs if one in his work can get along without them. If one could live upon tablets containing all the elements of nutrition, but which would not require digestion, nature would in time subordinate the digestive mechan- ism. If one should bandage his eye, he would gradually lose his vision simply because nature would not preserve the veiy delicate structures required for sight. 68 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING Nature always aims to construct and maintain organs so that they will be best adapted to the special work they have to do. One can see this illustrated in the case of animals. Take, for instance, a horse which must live out-of-doors in winter. Nature will develop a thick fur and a relatively insensitive skin as a protection against wind and weather. Now put this same horse in a warm stable. Cover him over with a blanket every time he goes out-doors. Feed him on oats and prepared food instead of on straw. Nature will then say: **This horse does not need a heavy fur. The skin does not need to be coarsened or toughened. Therefore I will develop a thin fur, and will leave the skin sensitive. I will not make the digestive organs so vigorous, and will not turn so much of the horse's energy in that direction." One never sees a horse-trainer who knows his business who will leave a high-bred horse out-of-doors feeding at a straw stack all winter. He knows that in order to develop the greatest speed of his horses, he must protect them from the weather and must not use up energy in the digestion of innutritions food. But when a trainer protects his horses in this way, he re- duces their power of resistance to cold and hard usage. Take a highly developed horse which has been kept in a warm stable for a part of the winter and fed on prepared food, and then HEALTH TRAINING 69 turn him out to the straw stack without any protection. He will perish. Nature has equipped him with reference to life in a warm stable and special food and she cannot change her program over night. A Natural Law; Disuse Leads to Decay — See how this law of nature applies to human life. Our remote ancestors were better endowed muscularly than we are to-day. They had greater biceps and leg and jaw muscles. They needed them in their business. They were in competi- tion with the beasts of the forest; and in a life of this kind muscle is the chief requirement. The mien of to-day have in a sense degenerated muscularly. And why? Because nature has concluded that tremendous biceps and leg and jaw muscles would be a handicap rather than a help to most men to-day since intelligence has come to take the place of muscle. Men who have worked hard up to fifty, say, and then retire go to pieces rapidly as a rule. Nature says: ''What is the use of keeping up these muscles and internal organs and mental faculties now that the man has no need of them I" And so she proceeds to get rid of them; which means that the man degenerates. And the most serious aspect of this is that nature always attaches penalties to decay. What she has built up she does not like to have de- stroyed. If she has developed big biceps, for 70 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING instance, and a man does not use tliem and they begin to deteriorate, they will be a constant source of aches and pains; and the same is true of every muscle and every organ. Nature is seen here in a double role; she destroys or weakens organs that are not needed in the indi- vidual's life, and at the same time she heaps severe penalties upon the individual who per- mits his organs to decay. This is the reason why most men who live an intellectual life have to take physical exercise of some sort, even though they may detest it. In any large univer- sity there are literally hundreds of men who would like to spend every moment of waking life at their intellectual tasks, but they have to take an hour or two every day merely to use their muscles and stimulate their internal organs so as to keep them from degenerating. The Intellectual vs. the Physical. — Nature has apparently not yet been able to develop the body so that one can lead a purely intellectual life. But is she seeking to do just this! Civili- zation is a result of the ascendancy of the in- tellectual over the physical. Nature is striving all the time to reduce the physical and exalt the mental. She is using parents, teachers, min- isters, legislators, and others to accomplish her purpose. They are all exalting the mental in modern life to the subjugation of the physical. Parents desire their children to be educated so HEALTH TRAINING 71 that they may win a livelihood by their intelli- gence rather than by their muscles. Teachers are working in the same direction. Ministers exhort people to live an ethical, moral, and re- ligious life, which necessitates the denial of physical desires largely. Our remote ancestors indulged their physical impulses without re- straint, but we will not tolerate such a regime today. Everywhere there is strain and stress to subdue the physical, and to get rid of muscu- lar effort through the exercise of intelligence. A person could spend his life in a small room to-day in any part of the civilized world, and still be in contact with the whole world. He could accumulate wealth without ever leaving his room. He could direct the operation of armies of men without ever seeing them. As a matter of fact, some of the men who have achieved fabulous fortunes, and have been of inestimable service, as we think, to mankind, have lived a life of seclusion. The reason for this is that we are living in an intellectual age when intelligence dominates muscle. The man who can issue his commands and mate his inquiries by telephone or telegraph will push ahead of the man who has to go on his own legs to communicate with persons and do his errands. The man who gets to the top to- day is the one who can make his head do the work formerly done by arms and legs. 72 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING The Law Works Both Ways. — Suppose one could bring a pioneer of the woods or the plains into one of our modem cities, and require him to live the kind of life that town and city or even country people do. He would soon be eliminated. He would die of consumption or hardening of the arteries or rheumatism or some other degenerative disease. Nature would have developed his body and mind for the out- of-doors, for dealing with crude physical con- ditions, and she could not make the change de- manded for adjustment to city life per saltum. In the same way, take a person who is well adjusted to the requirements of a city life and put him on the frontier, and Nature would speedily eliminate him. Now, take the story told by the New York woman. She declares that her own and her husband's family for generations were healthier than her own children are. She says she ob- serves families in her neighborhood in which no attention is given to the children, and they are ruggeder than her own. And she concludes that there must be something going wrong in her family. The Physical Results of " Refined' ' Living. — • There is nothing the matter with her family which is not the matter with the majority of families in present-day American life. This woman is bringing her children up in a **re- HEALTH TRAINING 73 fined'' manner. She would not let them live in the rough way in which the children in the poorer families live. She protects them for two reasons. In the first place, she wants them to be more delicate, to be better dressed, to look better cared for, and to be more polite in their actions than her neighbor's children are. In the second place, she thinks they will be better off if they are protected than if they are left to eat coarse food, and be ill-clad and dirty. But when she makes her children ** refined," she robs them of their power to combat disease. It is exactly the same in principle with a child as it is with a highly-bred race horse. One gets refinement at the expense of endurance of crude, harsh experience. There is no escape from it. It is safe to say that this mother prepares her children's food carefully. Her dietary prob- ably includes soft, delicate, *^ refined'* foods mainly. She probably has no hard bread, raw vegetables, or tough meat on her table. But these are just the articles of food that are eaten by the poorer children which this woman says are healthier than her own. Why shouldn't it be so? One reason this woman's children catch colds and coughs is because while she tries to protect them whenever they run out-of-doors, she can- not always oversee them, and they expose them- selves, and they are not trained to resist ex- 74 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING posure. They go to school, and they play along the way as the other children do, most of whom are more hardened than they are, and they suffer for it. If a child could always be protected from exposure there would be no great advantage in hardening him from the beginning. It is an exploded theory that you can harden a child in the first year, and that he will keep the re- sistance he develops into maturity without fur- ther hardening. Men who have been brought up in the country accustomed to all kinds of ex- posure soon lose their ability to resist disease if they come into the city to live indoors all the time. The Other Side of the Problem. — There is another side to this problem as every investi- gator to-day knows. The child of poverty, ill fed and exposed to the elements, often does not acquire endurance, but instead is destroyed. The abnormally high death-rate among children left to care for themselves is a menace in Amer- ican life. If we were still living under primitive conditions, the neglected child might survive. But as a matter of fact, no child in a town or city to-day can become innured to a life of great exposure, because he must walk on cement sidewalks, breathe devitalized indoor air, and have his senses bombarded by the over-stimu- lating sights and sounds of modern life. He HEALTH TRAINING 75 cannot adjust himself on the one side to the highly exciting, restrictive, and refining life of civilization, and on the other side to crude, primitive conditions. He is not doing it, as a matter of fact, as the statistics of child mortalit.y indicate. So children must be protected to some degree while at the same time being hardened so they can endure the sort of exposure that is practically inevitable in modern life. The Solution of the Problem. — What then is the solution of our problem? First, there must be improvement in community hygiene. For- tunately, we are making progress in this regard. A child of civilization cannot resist most con- tagious diseases as well as a primitive child can; but we are compensating for the loss of immunity by preventing the spread or con- tagious diseases so that children shall not be exposed to them. Children in the city cannot endure unhygienic conditions in the school- room as well as country children can; but we are making good this loss by constantly improv- ing these conditions. In the pioneer days a child could survive in a schoolroom heated with an un jacketed stove so that if he sat near it he might be 80 degrees on one side and from 20 to 40 degrees lower on the opposite side. Present-day city children would perish under such variations of temperature. But one rarely finds a schoolroom heated like that now, even 76 FlKyi STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING in the country, and so we are more than off- setting the disadvantages of refinement by the advantages of a hygienic regimen. Again, the pioneer child could sit in a seat ill-adapted to him in respect to every measure- ment of his body. The present-day child woiild contract spinal curvature and other serious de- fects under these conditions. In order to meet the changing conditions, we are equipping schoolrooms with seats which can be adjusted perfectly to the measurements of the individuals who use them. And so in regard to every detail of life, we are striving to improve the hygienic conditions under which children live, so that as civilization and refinement proceed they will not be subjected to experiences which will overtax their endurance and resistance. The problem of children's health in our day then is largely a community problem. But it is also a problem of the individual home. When parents refine their children faster than the hygienic conditions in the community are im- proved, they will weaken them, and they will pay for their lack of adjustment in pains and aches and disease. A parent might better take the chance of going too far in hardening a child by getting him accustomed from the beginning to wind and weather and deprivation and fatigue than of going too far in the opposite direction. CHAPTER III FIRST STEPS IN ETHICAL TRAINING I Nature's Command to the Child. — Nature sends the child into life with the command, **Get everything you wish without regard to the in- terests or desires of others. Look out for your- self first, last and all the time.^' One who will observe a child during his first year in his re- lations with his father, mother, brothers, and sisters, and others with whom he may come in contact, cannot doubt that he endeavors to carry out nature ^s command. He does not show at this early age that he feels any regret whatso- ever on account of the trouble he causes the people around him to provide for his comfort, protection and welfare. Of course, he is not aware that he is causing anyone any discomfort; so far as he is concerned he is the only one who could suffer from cold or hunger or loneli- ness or inactivity or anything else. Also he is the only one who could gain any pleasure from play, or sweets, or a good meal and the like. He does not reflect on these matters; he merely acts with a view to relieving his own distress 77 78 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING and gratifying his own desires witliout the slightest consciousness that others are like him- self, that they suffer as he does and gain pleas- ure from the things that give him pleasure. One sometimes hears parents scolding a year- old child because he is selfish, or unreasonable in the demands he makes upon the people around him, or is grossly lacking in gratitude for the service rendered him. But it is foolish to censure a child of this age for his faults. He does not know they are faults. He is without any ethical standards whatsoever. They must be developed in him by proper training. The fundamental fact to keep in mind in the child ^s ethical training is that by nature he is wholly self-centered. In the earliest months he does not and cannot take the point of view of any one but himself. He will not share his food because he does not realize that others may be hungry. He will strike a person who interferes with his pleasures because he does not appreciate that the one who is struck may suffer pain. He will make demands on his mother for service when she is utterly fatigued, because he does not know what fatigue means. He will squall until he irritates every one around him, because he does not know what irritation means. So every act he performs, no matter what it may be or what its consequences to others are, is done with- out any consciousness of its effects upon others ETHICAL TRAINING 79 except as tliey \\dll lead them to serve him in some way. An idiot cannot learn that others are con- stituted like himself, so that they can suffer as he does and can gain pleasure from the things that give him pleasure. He cannot be made to appreciate that he must repress his desires in order not to bring pain upon others, and he must share his pleasures wdth them in order to make them happy in the same way and for the same reason that he is happy. The First Requirement in Ethical Training. — In the ethical training of the normal child he must first be led to appreciate that others have feelings like his own. For illustration — a two- year-old child may strike his mother in the face when he does not secure what he wishes. If he is an untaught child he will not appreciate that he has caused his mother any pain. If she should cry when he strikes her he might be softened a little, but he would not be deterred from strik- ing her again when he could not secure what he wished. But he would have an awakening if the mother should do to him just what he did to her, and say to him, *^ That's the way mamma feels when you strike her? Do you like to have mamma strike you! Then you must not strike mamma because it hurts''; and if this experi- ence should be repeated a number of times the child would catch the idea that striking always 80 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING hurts because it hurts him, and he would gradu- ally learn to restrain himself whenever he was tempted to strike his mother. He learns this lesson when he touches a hot stove a number of times. He grows cautious when he falls down stairs several times, and so on. Every day, if he is a normal child, he makes progress in re- straining actions which will cause pain, pro- vided he sees that they really do cause pain. In time he will restrain himself from striking his mother even if she does not retaliate, because the pain he causes her, which is reflected in her countenance, will cause him similar pain. A six- months-old child is utterly unconscious of ex- pressions of pain in the people around him, but a five-year-old child may be quite sensitive. He suffers much as he sees others suffering, and this plays a part in preventing him from causing others pain. There are ways in which the mother could restrain the child from slapping mthout re- taliating in kind. She could go away from him and leave him alone, for instance. If the mother would, without variation, leave the babe when- ever he slaps her and not return to him no matter how strong an appeal he makes, she could establish in his mind a connection between her distress and his slapping and the conse- quence to him. In due time he would bring the act of slapping under control. Again, suppose ETHICAL TRAINING 81 an eighteen-montlis-old child is taken to the table and he grabs for sugar. It is entirely normal for him to do this. He has no con- ception whatever that there is any reason why he should refrain from securing sugar any way he can whenever he wants it; but if his hand were slapped every time he grabbed he would make the connection in time between grabbing and painful experience, and he would restrain him- self, provided there was never any omission in the penalty for grabbing. If there should be variation so that some days he would be slapped and others not, he would take his chances and he would probably never learn definitely to re- strain the act. One sees adults who have not learned to restrain wrong actions because in their early years they did not suffer penalties invariably for these actions. Instead of slapping the child's hand the mother could impress upon him by other more effective means that grabbing is not to be toler- ated. When he grabs she might not give him his food, or she might push him away or take him away from the table. In time he would connect grabbing with the class of actions that must not be performed because they are selfish or *^ pig- gish. ' ' At eighteen months he cannot see that if every one at the table grabbed for food it would be bad for all, but he can be made to appreciate this at the age of ten and very much more fully 82 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING at the age of twenty. His ethical growth, in re- spect to matters of this sort, requires practi- cally the whole period of development to com- plete. Ethical Lessons Must Be Concrete cmd Con- sistent. — The child's ethical lessons must be very concrete and very specific. Also, they must be absolutely uniform and unvarying. The chief difficulty in the ethical training of children in most homes is that they are treated one way to- day and another way tomorrow. At one time they are censured or even punished for an act that is overlooked at another time. Such train- ing as this is sure to lead to ethical chaos. It would be better for the child's ultimate ethical life that he should be indulged in his selfishness and domineering ways rather than that he should be restrained one day and indulged the next. Whenever the parent sets out to give the child a lesson in restraint of an action he must repeat that lesson until it is fully learned. He must never let a slump occur in the observance of the lesson. One reason many parents are unable to carry the lessons through to completion is that they make so many demands and rules that they can- not possibly have them all observed regularly and unvaryingly. It would be better for a child to learn one lesson until it is fixed than to have fifty lessons running at the same time and not ETHICAL TRAINING 83 have any of them made permanent. One con- stantly meets adults who show the results of a method of training in which it was never made clear to them that when an act was forbidden it must not be performed under any conditions. Also, when a command was given it must be observed at any cost. The lawless individuals one sees in daily life are the product of a vascillating method of ethical training; and they are neither happy themselves nor do they con- tribute to the happiness of others, simply be- cause they have not acquired the habit of con- forming to reasonable rules and regulations. Such persons have no stability of character, be- cause they do not know for sure what they can do and what they cannot do in their rela- tions with their associates. Regularity in Training. — Parents frequently complain of their inability to train their chil- dren to conform to the necessary rules of the household. They say that their children do not come to meals on time, that they are often late at school, and so on. We parents are often re- sponsible for these irregularities in our chil- dren's behavior. Here is a case to illustrate the principle: There are three boys in a family and they all attend a school which opens at 8:30 o'clock in the morning. The boys must go about three-fourths of a mile to reach the school. They ought to be out of bed at 6 :30 in order that 84 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING they may not be tardy at school. The rule is that they must be up at this hour, but all sorts of happenings are allowed to interfere with the rule. To-night, say, there may be a visitor at the home and he keeps the boys up beyond their usual bedtime. Then tomorrow morning they will not want to get up when called, and the mother will let them sleep a little later ** be- cause boys must have their full amount of sleep anyway.'' Every Friday night they go to a party of some kind, and while the other mem- bers of the household are up at the usual time on Saturday morning the mother dislikes to '^drag the boys out,'' and so they stick to their beds for an hour or more beyond the schedule time. They are always late in rising on Sunday morning, so late that they are frequently tardy at church. It is just as hard, the mother says, to get them up at half-past eight on Sunday as at half -past six on Monday. No matter when the invitation comes to get up, whether late or early, they decline it and resist exhortation so long as they think it is wise to do so. In military schools the reveille somids at 6 o'clock. Ten minutes after that time eveiy boy must be properly dressed and lined up ready for military drill, or for physical exercise, or for a cold spray. There never is any question about whether or not they may sleep longer. Boys under such discipline find it much easier to get ETHICAL TRAINING 85 up on time than when they must always debate the question as to when it is necessarj^ that they should leave their beds. ^Hien an act must be performed and there can be no exceptions or excuses made, it can be done comparatively easily. But when there is indecision and doubt, there is always a mental struggle which in- creases the discomfort of performing any action. Really, most of the distress connected with such matters as rising in the morning, being at meals on time, being prompt at school, and so on, is the result of mental conflict due to the lack of certainty as to whether these things have to be done or whether some liberty can be taken with them. II The Treatment of Backward Children. — Quite frequently parents who have the problem of training backward children are in doubt as to whether it is right to require such children to observe the rules and reg-ulations which are ob- served by normal children. Usually parents say, in substance: *^We have a child who is not developing as rapidly as he should do. He does not learn readily to control his appetite or his temper. We feel that we ought not to punish him for his shortcomings because he does not have understanding as other children do. It does not seem right to penalize a child who is 86 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING backward when be does not restrain himself at the table, or leave things that do not belong to him alone, or control his temper when he does not get what he wishes/^ The view generally taken by those who are lenient with a backward child is that he cannot learn to control his impulses. It is tme that such a child does not acquire self-restraint as rapidly or as fully as do normal children. This is one reason why he is backward. The instinct-3 of all young children are stronger than their sense of what is right and proper in their relations with others; but as normal children develop they rapidly gain control of their instincts, while backward children gain control of them more slowly. It has been shown that it is possible to gain control even of reflex action. The secretion of saliva and gastric juice can be controlled in some measure in a creature as low as a dog. Every time the dog is fed for several weeks a bell is rung. Then the bell is rung without feeding him, and saliva and gastric juice will be secreted just as when he was fed. Through association with feeding the ringing of the bell has acquired the power to produce responses which originally were produced only by the food. Of course, everyone knows that a dog can be taught so he will control some of his impulses, ETHICAL TRAINING 87 such as barking, stealing food from the table, chasing the cat, and the like. Horses also can be taught self-restraint to some extent. Even an imbecile is higher in the scale of mental and nervous development than a dog or a horse and he can acquire self-restraint in a higher degree than they can. This means that backward and even feeble-minded children can be trained to control their angry passions, to conform to reasonable rules and regulations governing their actions at table, and the like. A backward child requires a larger number of repetitions of a penalty in order to learn to control an impulse than does a normal child; but nevertheless he can make the connection between penalty and misdeed. It is of supreme importance that he should do this early for his own welfare and for the welfare of all with whom he has relations. In the development of a normal child new interests constantly appear, and these operate to absorb the child's attention and energies so that the original impulses become subdued for lack of support. A boy in the teens does not run or yell as much as he did when he was seven or eight years of age, because new interests have developed which claim his attention and use his energy and he has no desire to run and yell as he formerly did. But in backward or feeble- minded children new interests do not develop as rapidly and do not become as strong as they 88 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING do in normal children. This is one reason why backward children require the use of more force in their training than do normal children. The typical child might grow np into well-controlled adulthood without any special training in self- restraint; imitation of others, the development of new interests, lessons gained from reading and so on would act as subduing and restraining influences upon his impulsive conduct. But this is not the case with a backward child. He tends to live more on the plane of his impulses, so that what he sees others do, what he reads, and so on, all of which ought to restrain his impulses, does not have much effect upon him as com- pared with the normal child. For this reason he must have a stronger hand over him than is necessary in the training of a normal child. Sentimentality in dealing with him can result only in disadvantage to himself and to those who must live with him. Because he is back- ward is the very reason why he must be taught that definite penalties are connected with spe- cific acts of misbehavior, and when he learns this lesson he will conduct himself so as to avoid pains and penalties. Ill The Treatment of Anger. — All children be- come angry easily as compared with adults, but this is particularly true of backward children. ETHICAL TRAINING 89 The following concrete case will illustrate the principle : ''My daughter has adopted a boy, who is now seven years of age. She adopted him when he was a baby. He has always lost his temper easily, and my daughter has lost hers just as easily. When he becomes angry and cries lustily or throws himself on the floor, she whips him, but this only seems to make him worse. She will often tie a handkerchief around his mouth when he is yelling, but this angers him all the more. Sometimes the nerves are so swollen in his neck and head when he is crying I am afraid some very serious thing will happen to him. He does not seem to be getting any better, but my daughter thinks the best way to cure him is to whip him harder. Will he outgrow thisf One often sees a child who is entirely over- come with anger. He will throw himself on the floor and be utterly unconscious of what is hap- pening to him, or probably of what he himself is doing. The more that is said to him when he is in such a condition, the more violent he becomes. He is, for all practical purposes, insane; that is to say, he has lost the power of control. When anger becomes established in this way in the organism, it dominates every- thing — heart, lungs, every vital process. The more a child is stimulated under such a condi- tion, whether he be scolded, or threatened, or 90 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING whipped, or pleaded with, the more completely the anger will get control of him. One cannot reason with him because reason is dethroned for the time being. He is even unconscious of pain, so completely does the emotion of anger dominate his feelings. It is absurd to whip a child who is dominated by anger. It is just as bad to tie a handker- chief around his mouth. The best thing t-o do is to let him alone, and let his passion wear itself out. If he could be taken before the anger gains the upper hand, he might be controlled. A parent who can tell when her child is likely to get into a tantrum can sometimes stop it by dashing cold water in his face, or by suddenly taking him in her arms and holding him securely, without talking to him. This latter plan will work in some cases, and in other cases it will simply be the means of hastening the tempest. Ordinarily the best way to treat an abnormal conditions like this is to let it alone. What the parent should do is to study the things which will arouse the child's anger and then avoid these things. It is the height of folly for a parent to excite anger in a child, and then tiy to control it by punishment. It is worse than folly; it is binital, and is likely to ruin the child. Nipping a Tantrwn vn the Bud. — A certain physician is the father of two boys, aged three ETHICAL TRAINING 91 and five. He is an unusually gentle and clever man and he has a good time with his boys. He is their best playmate, and they have rollicking games together. But, like all boys of this age, they occasionally have to be disciplined. When one of them has offended in any way, the father taps him on the hand and tells him to leave the table or the room in which he is playing and to wait until he comes to talk with him. Recently the elder boy grabbed some lumps of sugar at the dinner table. This was a forbidden act. The father tapped him on his hand and told him to go away. The boy began to howl. He started off, but threw himself on all fours and yelled at the top of his voice. The father directed one vigorous slap on the most conspicu- ous part of the boy's anatomy. Instantly he jumped to his feet, stopped his yelling, actually smiled back at his father, and ran off to await the father's coming. When the father went to see him he was in a compliant mood and eager to make amends. He came back in a good spirit and all went well for the rest of the meal and has gone well for the succeeding meals up to the time when this story is being written. The physician in discussing the matter said: **0n several occasions previously Jack got into a fit of angry, rebellious crying when he had to be punished, and he kept up howling until he wore 92 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING out everybody within reach of his voice. He would almost get into hysterics. That slap was the first corporal punishment I ever used on the boy, but it was the most salutary thing he has received. It was given right at the critical moment. If the fit had gone any farther, it would have taken entire possession of him.'' Of course, a child who is slapped or dowsed with cold water or chastised in any other way frequently will become callous to the punish- ment, and it will not divert his attention when a tantrum is coming on. A parent who is always doing something to his children often complains because they ignore what he says or his methods. It will work out this way in nine cases out of ten. IV Avoid the Direct Command. — Usually a crisis in dealing with children can be avoided by avoiding a direct command. A concrete instance will illustrate an effective method of securing responses from children without arousing anger. There are two boys, aged five and seven, in a certain household. One evening recently, when bed time had arrived, the father said to the boys: ^^You must go to bed now." Both boys begged to be allowed to play a little longer. The father waited ten minutes and then he said: ETHICAL TRAINING 93 **Now, boys, you have had quite a good deal of play. You must go to bed/' Again tbey begged for a few minutes grace, saying that they were not quite through with their play ; and they really were not through with it. The father urged, but finally relented and allowed them a few minutes longer for play. But when the time was up the boys were still engrossed with their play and were not ready to go to bed. The father grew impatient and threatened the boys with punishment if they did not stop their play at once and go up stairs. But still they pleaded for a few minutes more to complete their play. It was evident they would either have to be whipped and sent up stairs or they would have to be dragged up by the father. Just then the mother appeared on the scene. She sensed the situation immediately and she said to the boys: **I have a new harness for each of my ponies. I want to hitch them up to my carriage and show the neighbors what a fine turn-out I have.'* Both boys stopped their play and were all atten- tion and ready for the drive. The mother took a simple measuring tape, put it around the boys' necks and said, ^^Here is my fine new harness.'' She took a broom and put between them and said, ^'Here's the brand new carriage." She took a yard measure in her hand and said, '^Here is my new whip that I use to make my ponies behave." She then gave 94 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING each one a smart tap on his bare leg and the team started off. They went around through the rooms three or four times. "All along the streets the ^^ neighbors '* were gazing at the new turn out. Every chair was a house. Going through the doors was turning into a new street. Finally they came to the boulevard, which was the stairs, and up the ponies went with great spirit, and on they sped to the bedroom, which was their stable. When they got in they were unharnessed and very willingly they permitted their clothes to be taken off, because horses must have their harness removed after the day's driving. Also fine ponies have to be rubbed down, face and hands and even body being thor- oughly gone over. Then they had to have a drink after their long drive because they were thirsty, and finally they were ready for their night ^s rest. Throughout this game the boys were greatly interested and did not offer the slightest objec- tion to anything mother suggested; and they finally jumped into bed in a cheerful frame of mind. This little drama was enacted many nights in succession, and the boys came to look forward to being hitched up and driven around the city, and finally rubbed down and put into their stalls. Another mother followed the same principle in inducing her children to go to bed, but she / ETHICAL TRAINING 95 had them personify birds instead of horses. They would fly around through the rooms calling in bird notes to one another, and finally they would fly to the topmost branches of the trees for the night so that night prowlers — cats especially — could not get them. The children were always ready to fly up the stairs when the mother would say, ^^Now, we must get out of reach of the cats.'' Make Use of the Dramatic Instmct. — A child will readily play the part of any bird or animal ; and he will endure almost any hardship in order to carry through a game. He will even play the role of a pig and be put in his pen for the night. Most pleasantly of all he will transform himself into an Indian and perform any task bravely as an Indian always does. He can even be influenced in regard to his dietetic habits by assuming a role. A concrete instance will illus- trate how far his dramatic interest will carry him. There were two children, aged four and six, in a certain home. Across the street was a family with two children, and there was con- siderable rivalry between the two families. The children in one family would brag about what they could do to the children in the other family. The children in the first home referred to were finicky about their food. They would only eat sweet foods; particularly they would 96 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING not eat cereals. Finally, one morning when the boys pushed away their cereal the mother said: ''Did I tell you I put Jimmie in one of those dishes and Jack in the other! If yon want to you can eat 'em up." Instantly both boys pulled their dishes over and eagerly ate every morsel of the cereal. For a number of days thereafter the mother used this device. She employed it successfully indeed until the boys acquired a taste for cereal food. Some mothers will think such a device as this is of doubtful value; but it illustrates what can be done by appealing to a child's dramatic interest. Make Use of Emulation. — Here is another illustration. A boy of five would not eat crusts of bread or any hard food. In fact he would push any food away from him which was not soft and mushy. His mother awakened his in- terest in hard bread by saying to him: *'Do you know how Billy (one of his playmates and rivals) is getting to be so strong? In a few days he will be able to throw you and run faster than you. He asks his mother to give him crusts of bread and hard flakes so that he can get to be strong. He wants to be stronger than any boy on this street. He wants to have better wind, too, so that he can outrun any boy on the street. He knows that if he will eat crusts and the hard flakes he will have good wind and his legs and arms will be strong. '^ ETHICAL TRAINING 97 Xo one had to say very much thereafter to that boy about eating the crusts of his bread and the hard cereal food. "ViHienever he showed a tendency to avoid the hard foods his mother would only have to remark: ^'I wonder whether Billy is going to be stronger than any other boy on the street. He looks to me as though he would be because he eats hard foods w^hich will make his muscles strong and give him good wind. ^ ' Resourceful parents can take advantage of' this interest to induce their children to perform willingly and even cheerfully distasteful actions such as taking castor oil, or washing behind the ears, or having their hair cut, and the like. So far as possible the direct command should be avoided when it arouses a rebellious attitude. In due course children will perform actions in response to commands because they respect the authority of the parent and the teacher; and besides, they will appreciate the necessity of performing actions relating to the care of their health, or observance of the rules of the house- hold, or helping to lighten the burdens of the home and so on. But in the earliest years they cannot understand the reason for many of the things that are required of them, and the best plan to follow with them is to have these things done with the least resistance and irrita- tion. 98 • FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING V One Cause of ''Obstinacy/' — Much of the apparent obstinacy of children is due to their misunderstanding of commands. For instance: A father brought a friend home one evening. When the four-year-old boy in the house came to greet the friend the father said, *^Show Mr. B. that you can shake hands with your right hand.^' The father extended his own right hand as a suggestion to the boy, whereupon the boy gave his left hand to the friend. The father said, **0h, no, I said the 7%ght hand — just as I do, you see,'' and he extended his right hand to the boy again, but the boy extended his left hand as before. The father was impatient and after the friend had gone he gave the boy a little lecture, telling him he should do as he was told to do. The father blamed him because he was not obedient. To an adult it seems impossible that a four- year-old boy should not be able to distinguish his right from his left hand, and when such a boy is asked to give his right hand and extends his left instead, it appears that he is either in- different or disobedient. But as a matter of fact it is a slow process for a child to associate definitely the words ** right hand'' with the proper hand so that he can always make the right connection at once. Any psychologist under- ETHICAL TRAINING 99 stands the reason why it requires a long period with a great deal of experience for a child to learn to distinguish between members on the right half of the body and those on the left. The child does not think of his body in halves or sides. The right eye is not different from the left eye, the right leg from the left leg. When one says ^* right ear'' to a young child, either ear is meant so far as he is concerned. There really is no reason why he should dis- tinguish right from left in the early years, since he has no vital experiences which teach him that there is any essential difference. In due time a child will discover that he uses one side of the body more than the other. He writes, draws, throws stones, whittles, and so on with his right hand and never uses his left. If the parent will say to him: ^^Show me your throwing hand" he will make no mistake. If the father had said to the boy: ^* Shake hands with Mr. B. with your throwing hand,'' he would have been able to execute the command correctly. The father mentioned above not only failed to take account of his boy's difficulty in dis- criminating the right from the left hand, but he deliberately confused him. He stood before him extending his own right hand. He should have appreciated that the boy would extend the hand on the side of the body nearest to the father's right hand. The boy did not think of himself as 100 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING facing his father and so he should extend the opposite hand from that extended by the father. This is a rather difficult process of orientation, which even adults cannot always perform. One may see a physical culture teacher facing a group of adults and setting a copy in cales- thenics with the right hand. Most of the adults will imitate with the left hand. Often a physical culture teacher scolds his pupils, the older as well as the younger ones, because they make such mistakes, when a little reflection would have convinced the instructor that he was un- wittingly confusing his pupils. A capable physical culture teacher, facing his pupils, always uses his left hand when he desires his pupils to use the right, and in this way he avoids confusing them. A parent cannot take too great pains to see that a child correctly understands every com- mand given him. Ninety-nine out of a hundred parents will have constantly to resist the ten- dency to assume that what they themselves un- derstand will be intelligible to their children. They have so completely forgotten the details of their own learning that they cannot or at least they do not take the point of view of the novice. Deferred Commands. — Here is another method of giving commands which is the cause of much trouble. A father says to his son: ETHICAL TRAINING 101 '^ Jack, I would like to have you feed Billy (the horse) at half -past five because I in.uf^t:us^ him as soon as I get home from the office at supper, time.'' The boy runs off, assuring tlis 'fathei that he will not forget. What are the chances that he will remember the command? Suppose the boy had said to the father as the latter was leaving for his office: ^^ Daddy, I would like to have you call me on the telephone at half -past five and remind me that I am to take my medicine at that time.'' What are the chances that the father would remember! They are very slight. Some readers may ask: ^^Why should the father carry that matter in his mind all the afternoon when he had so many more important things to look after! It would be unfair to expect him to remember it and he should not have been asked to do so." All of which is quite true and reasonable. But the situation with respect to Jack is pre- cisely the same as it would have been with the father if he had been asked to remember Jack's request. Jack's afternoons are filled with very important activities, so far as he is concerned. He cannot keep thinking about feeding the horse and watching the clock so that the hour of five- thirty will not pass without his executing the father's command. The matter is dislodged from the boy's thoughts as soon as he leaves his house for school. He falls in with com- 102 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING panions anci they have most interesting experi- ences to tell him and great plans for after-school activities to lay before him. When he reaches school he has an important task to perform which absorbs his attention. When school closes at four there are exciting entei*prises to be carried through. All of these matters claim the boy's full attention, and no room is left for keeping in mind the command given him when he left the house at noon. Of course, he forgets to perform the task. It could have been predicted that he would forget it. The command should not have been given in the way in which it was given. Taking the Child's Point of View. — We parents bring unending trouble upon ourselves because we naively assume that our own duties are always important while our children's activ- ities are of no consequence. But as a matter of fact, a boy of twelve is more completely absorbed in his undertakings than we are in most of ours, no matter how important they may be. If one could look into the brain of a twelve-year-old boy while he is playing with companions or working at his lessons in the classroom or read- ing stories, ^ay, it would be found that the thing in hand was monopolizing his consciousness and excluding everything else; but if, on the other hand, one could look into the brain of a typical adult whik he is engaged in any of his usual ETHICAL TRAINING 103 activities it would be found that there would be other activities on the outskirts of attention which were receiving a partial or marginal hear- ing. This means that the typical adult may not be entirely forgetful of activities which should be performed, even though they are not vitally related to the one in hand or to his chief inter- ests. The adult can carry deferred commands in mind better than the child can simply because he has a more fully developed brain which can hold series of more or less unrelated activities and ideas; one activity or idea in a series will be dominant, but some of the others may be suf- ficiently potent so that they will not be com- pletely eliminated from attention. How should the parent have given the com- mand to the boy so that at half -past ^ve he would have thought of the horse! He should have associated the idea of feeding the horse with some activity which the boy would be perform- ing at about half-past five; or he should have connected it with some happening which would attract the boy's attention, such as the blow- ing of the whistles in the city, or the men pass- ing from their work, or any similar event. If feeding the horse were strongly enough tied up with any of these events, then when they oc- curred they would automatically remind the boy of his duty and he would perform it. What is required for success in having chil- 104 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING dren remember deferred commands is to con- nect them with happenings which will call them into mind at the appropriate time. They can be kept in mind by some children, but not by all, if they will be rewarded when they do not for- get. But even rewards and punishments fre- quently fail to cause a child to remember to per- form duties at some distant time if he has no reminder when the time to perform them arrives. The parent and the teacher should provide such reminders, for otherwise most of their commands designed to be executed in the future will be neglected. Children will be ac- cused of carelessness and disobedience, when as a matter of fact they may not be guilty of either. One is indifferent or disobedient only when he knows an act should be performed, but he delib- erately chooses not to perform it either because he does not care about it or because he wishes to show his opposition to authority. Nagging. — We parents often make another mistake in regard to giving deferred commands. We may give a command to a child in the morn- ing to be performed at night, but we suspect he will forget it, so every time we see him during the day we say: *^ Don't forget what I told you.'' What is the result of this method of training? In the first place it is likely to be irritating to a child and may arouse opposition in him; but more serious still he is apt to gain the impres- ETHICAL TRAINING 105 sion that when a command is given it will in- cessantly be repeated and he does not need to make any effort to remember it on his own account; so he may grow into the habit of let- ting commands come in one ear and escape out of the other. One can see children who have grown utterly indifferent to repeated reminders of duties to be performed. It is as though the mind was made callous by the wearing effect of constantly repeated commands. When one first hears Niagara Falls it claims all his attention, but after he has lived within the sound of it for a year he grows indifferent to it until in the end he may not hear it at all. The same is true of the sights and sounds in a city. What is often repeated comes to be largely ignored as a rule. This should be a warning to any parent; he should avoid treating his chil- dren so that they ignore his command^ or his exhortations because they become so accustomed to them. The rule should be: Give commands rarely but when they are given make them so explicit and clear and impressive that they will stay near the focus of consciousness, as the psychologist says, and then they will be likely to be executed, especially if they be connected with automatic reminders. Long-range Commands, — There is still an- other method of issuing commands which rarely if ever secures erood results. It is illustrated in 106 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING the following instance: A father writes that he has difficulty in getting either of his two boys to do anything he asks them to do. He says they are not **bad boys/' they are not ^ ^ obstinate/ ' they do not intend to *' resist his authority;'' they simply forget his commands. He then goes into some detail in describing concrete instances of their indifference. It is plain to see that he follows the usuax method of giving commands at long distance, as it were, and at inappropriate times. He will come into the house and say casually to one of the boys, *^You should fill the wood box before you go to school this noon." The boy replies: *^A11 right; I'll do it." But he is reading an interesting story. He keeps at the story until it is time to rush off to school. Then the father upbraids him at night because he forgot his task. It is practically certain that commands given in this way will fail to be obeyed in seven or eight out of ten cases. Why? Because they do not take effect in the consciousness of the per- son who is commanded; they go in one ear and out the other because the mind is fully occu- pied, as it should be, with what he is doing at the moment. The father mentioned above should have got the boy's complete attention and held it until the command found lodgment. Then the boy would have filled the box. ETHICAL TRAINING 107 In many schools and homes commands are shot out into space constantly, and not one-tenth of them land any place. They cannot take effect unless the attention of the one to whom they are directed is secured and held long enough for the command to make an impression. The habit of standing aloof and telling children while they are engaged in reading or visiting to do this and do that, and then complaining when they forget is an irritating and fruitless method- It very rarely secures desired results, and the chances are that the atmosphere of issuing com- mands and finding fault will permeate the home and the school. When Parents Disagree. — The problems of training are greatly increased when the parents do not agree in regard to the method of pro- cedure. The following is a case in point: A mother in Michigan has a five-year-old boy who is noisy in his play. He likes to climb on the furniture and on the railing around the porch of the house. His father says he will break his neck unless he is repressed. The mother wishes to give the boy considerable freedom to in- dulge his interests, but the father thinks he should be dealt with strictly, and should be made to keep quiet when he is in the house. The father strikes the boy when he is noisy, and he insists that the mother should abandon her foolish notions about allowing the boy to play 108 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING freely and run and climb and yell in the house. This is not the only household in the country in which the father and the mother do not agree in regard to the training of the children. As a rule, the father in such homes never reads any- thing relating to child nature, and so he is densely ignorant of all that has been accom- plished these last few years in the study of child life. Such a man is usually selfish as well as ignorant, and so he demands that his children keep still when he is around so that they will not annoy him. What is a mother to do when the man of the house is ignorant and selfish in his relations with his children. First of all, she should send the children to a kindergarten or a Montessori school, if there is one in the community, at as early an age as they will be accepted, even as early as four. They will be better off in a kindergarten or a Montessori school than they will be in a home in which they are rigorously repressed or in which there is discord between the father and mother in respect to methods of training. When the children come from school they should play out-of-doors if the weather will permit. For at least half the year, as well in the northern as in the southern part of the coun- try, children can be out-of-doors practically all the time they are not in school, or asleep, or eat- ing their meals, or preparing their lessons. It ETHICAL TRAINING 100 is true they may have to associate with rough playmates sometimes; but it would be better to take some chances with their playing with such companions than to keep them in the house when the father is harsh and intolerant. Not infrequently men dislike to have children around them at all; in such cases the less the children see of their fathers the better off they will be. Correcting Faults hy Substitution. — Most mothers do not tell or read stories to their noisy children as much as they should do. There is scarcely a town or city in the country in which there is not a public library or a loan library. In some states there are traveling libraries, and books suitable for children of all ages can be secured regularly even in rural districts. In a home in which there is an irritable father, the mother should aim to have a book of stories always at hand. If the children are likely to be unduly noisy after supper the mother should promise them that she will read to them if they will help her do up the dishes. They will usually be glad to make such a bargain. Of course, when they have learned to read easily, all the mother will need to do will be to provide books for them and they will entertain themselves. Under such conditions there will be no further trouble about their being noisy in the house. Young children find pleasure in using brush and paints. A mother who will provide paints, no FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING brush and paper for children after the age of four or five will avoid many an unpleasant scene in a house in which there are persons who are easily disturbed by children's boisterous play. A mother should visit the kindergartener in her coromunity and learn how to secure mate- rials for painting, as well as other materials to keep her children occupied during their free periods. In an article on ** Kindergarten Meth- ods in the Home'' in the Mother's Magazine for July, 1919, numerous suggestions were made relating to ways and means of providing whole- some occupation for young children in the home. Of course, children love to look at pictures. Every public library in America should have a room-full of picture books for children. A mother of a boy who is apt to upset the house- hold after supper because of his rough play should have a picture book ready for him and in this way she can keep him quiet without scold- ing him. VI Learning to Serve. — In the ethical training of the young it is imperative that they learn to serve as well as to be served. They cannot be taught this lesson simply by commanding them to help others; they must be led to feel a desire to relieve distress in others and to provide for their comfort. Often they can receive valuable ETHICAL TRAINING 111 training by having pets of their own to care for, though this is not always the case as the fol- lowing instance illustrates: Helen always has several pets — ^birds, kittens, a dog, a pony. The family are in good circum- stances and can afford everything the child de- sires. There are two older children who also have pets, but not so many as Helen. There are servants in the family and Helen has turned over the care of her pets to them. She rarely feeds the pets; she does not serve them in any way that is necessary for their welfare. She simply uses them for her own pleasure. She will decorate her kitten and play with it, but she will not prepare its food or attend to its bed; she requests the servants to look after such matters for her. Helen may gain some ethical advantage from her pets, but she would receive much more bene- fit if she would attend to their needs as well as use them for her pleasure. She really is not sensitive to their needs, although she will protect them from being teased by her brother, and she will defend them against harm from anyone. They furnish her opportunities for play, and they undoubtedly are in this way of value in her intellectual development. But she is selfish in her possession of them. As a rule she will not let others play with them or enjoy them. She maintains that they are her very 112 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING own and everyone else must *4et them alone.'' So her pets appear to make her more rather than less selfish. There is the danger that children who grow up in the city and do not have to care for chil- dren or animals or plants will not develop thoughtfulness for the welfare of others. If there were no living things that we felt could suffer from our neglect, none of us would ac- quire self-restraint, and we would not learn to serve others as we would be served. Every ethical and moral principle finds its justifica- tion in the fact that persons, and animals also, have needs and can suffer pain and so they have rights that must be respected. Now, take a child who is always served by others and who does not feel that anyone depends on his service or his self-denial and it will be difficult for him to acquire ethical and moral ideas and ideals. Training Character in the Schoolroom. — Teachers often assign work in the schoolroom for the purpose of training character. It is sometimes said that a child who has to solve mathematical or granunatical problems or mas- ter a spelling lesson will learn to be diligent, to exert himself, and to conform to necessary rules and regulations. There is undoubtedly some ethical value in such work, but still a pupil always realizes that if he does not perform his task no one will really suffer thereby. The task ETHICAL TRAINING 113 is a more or less arbitrary one, and the child appreciates that it is assigned solely for his training, and he is willing to take chances on his coming out all right in maturity without per- forming the task. If he is inaccurate, negligent, forgetful, careless, greedy, no one suffers actual inconvenience or pain so far as he can see. But if he exhibits these characteristics when he has to care for a dog or a cow or a colt or a bird he discovers very readily that he must adopt a dif- ferent course or trouble will result. His rela- tion to his pony or kitten or puppy, if they de- pend on him for care and well being, is not an arbitrary one. If he does not restrain himself in his selfish tendencies and become thoughtful of their needs he has very concrete and emphatic evidence of his misconduct. He can be made to see that it is misconduct too, and he will appre- ciate that punishment therefor is reasonable. But it is not so apparent to him that penalties for failure to solve his algebra problems, say, are justifiable. Pets for the Boy and the Girl. — In this con- nection mention may be made of the value of special pets, as the horse, the dog, and the kit- ten, in the development of the boy and the girl. A great educator, who has given particular at- tention to the care and culture of boys, has said that a boy could not develop properly unless he could have a horse to ride and to train and to 114 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING care for. This experience will teach a boy as hardly anything else can do to control his actions so that he can manage his horse and teach him to do what is desired of him. Of course, a boy who has a horse should be respon- sible for his well-being — for feeding him, keep- ing him clean, exercising him, and so on. The next best pet for a boy is a dog, espe- cially a collie dog, which will be very responsive to the boy's expressions. A young girl will also be benefited by having a collie dog for a pet. Watch children playing with a dog, and note how lively they are in their mental and bodily activi- ties. They must make quick and accurate per- ceptions, and react readily and definitely. Often a boy will prefer a collie dog to a brother or sister as a playmate, especially when the latter will not play fair in games. Sometimes a brother or sister will domineer over a younger member of the family, and will not enter into give-and- take relations with him; so the latter will prefer his dog, with which he has a chance to play the leading role in all games. A child will gladly take his turn in playing a part in which he must follow the commands of others; but he will not always do this. For instance, a five-year-old, will play horse say, when his playmate is the master. He will even stand being whipped, and hitched to a post for long periods at a time in order that the game may go on; but he will not ETHICAL TRAINING 115 endure this always. He will wish to take his turn at being the master himself; and if his playmate will not agree to this, then he will go to his horse and dog, both of which will permit him to gratify his passion to be master. A boy should have pets which will give him an opportunity to express his interest in vigor- ous physical activities, as in wrestling and com- peting in other sorts of muscular contests. The girl, on the other hand, will be more interested in and benefited by pets which will lend them- selves to decoration, caressing and such-like gentle attentions. The reason a young girl is usually delighted with a kitten or a canary is because it will endure to have ribbons tied about its neck and to be caressed and cared for as though it were a young babe. A pet like a kitten serves about the same purpose in mental devel- opment as a doll, except that it requires more ingenuity on the part of the girl to manage it. VII Children's Rights in the City. — ^It is not easy to provide pets and other facilities for city children, but it is imperative that the needs of city children be considered more carefully than they 'are in many places. We are hearing a good deal in these times about the rights of various groups of adults — women's rights, em- 116 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING ployers' rights, workers' rights, and so on, but we rarely hear anything said about children's rights. Do they have any rights? This is be- ing very heatedly discussed just now in a mid- dle-western city. Many of the children in this city have roller skates. Nearly every one of them has an express wagon or Flying Dutchman or Irish Mail. They indulge in roller skating and they operate their wagons on the sidewalks at all hours during the day. It need hardly be said that they make a lot of noise. Eoller skating is a noisy pastime and riding in a cart which does not have rubber tires is even noisier. A num- ber of citizens in this city have written to the newspapers complaining about the frightful racket which the children make. They say it has become so annoying that it is impossible to secure an hour's quiet anywhere in the city. Nervous people declare that they are made ill by these incessant irritating noises. The police have been asked to put an end to the nuisance, but they are unwilling to proceed against the children be- cause they say there are no laws which make it an offense for children to skate or run carts on the sidewalks. Some of the parents have come to the defense of their children. They maintain that since the children have had no voice respecting their hav- ing been brought into the city, they must be per- mitted to live their life in a child's way. At the ETHICAL TRAINING 117 present writing the roller-skating and express- carting are in full tide in all sections of the city, and it has not yet been decided whether or not the city officials will take any action against the children. How the Problem Can he Solved. — This is a typical problem which has to be solved sooner or later by every city of any size, no matter whether it is located in America or in any other country. Children who play on the streets of a crowded city are always a disturbing factor. They not only make noise but they get in the way of pedestrians and commerce. In some cities rigorous laws are put on the statute books compelling children to keep off the streets. If there are no public playgrounds, then they are required to play in their own homes. Of course, they often take a chance and try to play on the streets, but they are always being chased by the police and frequently penalties are inflicted upon them or upon their parents for violating the laws. No city has ever yet solved this problem satis- factorily which has not proceeded on the prin- ciple that children as well as adults have rights which must be respected. These rights are just as important and vital as are the rights of adults. Adults are stronger, of course, and they have control of the resources of the city and can suppress the children if they wish to 118 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING do SO, but SO far as justice is concerned tliey should not suppress tliem. Does this mean that children should be al- lowed to roller-skate whenever and wherever they choose, and also operate their express carts and throw snowballs and roll hoops and run over the lawns whenever and wherever they choose? It means nothing of the kind. When a large proportion of the adults in a city claim that they are irritated by the noise which the children make the latter must be restrained to some extent. Either they must indulge in their noise-making activities on certain streets set aside for them, or if this is not feasible, then they must play their noisy games at certain times during the day and not at other times. An adult who is irritated by roller skates, carts and the like might be able to work out his pro- gram so that for two hours each day, say, the children could engage in these pastimes, if during the rest of the day the adult could be sure that he would not be disturbed. But he should not be expected to submit to a regimen which will make it impossible for him to have any hour during the day when he can be free from an irritating, disturbing racket. Of course, the best way to solve this problem would be for a community to maintain a play- ground in ever}^ ward in which there should be facilities for roller-skating and other activities THICAL TRAINING 119 which will gratify the normal passion of the young to be active and to make noise. Communi- ties provide places for adults to indulge their interests, and children have as good claim on the resources of the community as have the adults. CHAPTER IV FIRST STEPS IN SOCIAL TRAINING Man Is THE Social Animal. — A three-montlis- old child should begin to distinguish people, at least his father and mother, the latter especially, and perhaps his brothers and sisters, from all other things with which he comes in contact From the moment he makes a start in recogniz- ing people as distinct from inanimate objects and animals his social desires develop with great rapidity. His social hunger increases in intensity until he reaches the teens at any rate. Nature so planned it in order that the individual might be- come a member of human society. If he did not like people better than dogs, or cats, or birds, or the trees in the forest, or any other natural objects, he would not wish to be with his kind and he would not sympathize and cooperate with his fellows. Cats never develop a social organiza- tion because their social instincts are of a very low order. The typical cat would rather be alone than to be a member of an organized group of cats. The same is true in considerable measure 120 SOCIAL TRAINING 121 of all animals, though dogs, monkeys and the like show some social feeling and desire. But man is above all other living things a social animal; his nature is social more than it is anything else. Since nature has made man a social animal she has obligated him to develop his social nature to the highest degree. She heavily punishes one who is not social. The keenest distress any one can feel arises from his failure to sympathize with people and to receive their sympathy in return. If one will study the life of an unhappy adult he will probably find he is unhappy because he does not know how, or does not have the will to live harmoniously with his fellows. He is mean, or selfish, or suspicious, or dishonest, or revengeful, or unsympathetic; or in some way he does not dwell in peace and good will with the people around him, and they show him that they distrust him and dislike him or abhor him so that they Avill have nothing to do with him. No normal individual can endure treatment like this without extreme distress. Any normal person would rather be afflicted with toothache than to be condemned or shunned by his fellows. People who have physical ills are often cheerful and optimistic and they get much pleasure out of life, but those who have no friends and who are avoided or censured by their associates are never optimistic, and they act as though life were not worth living. 122 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING Solitary Confinement. — The most acute pain which a normal person can suffer arises when he is completely separated from his fellows. The tyrannical rulers of the world understand this, for they build dungeons into which they put those who will not serve them or who threaten their autocratic rule. Dungeons are always con- structed so that any one who is imprisoned in them can have no intercourse with other human beings, not even see the face of the jailers. Those who have had this experience and have survived it have testified that it was only by a supreme effort that they could save themselves from mad- ness. Apparently nature destroys a human mind that cannot have contact with any other human mind, as in the case of lonely herders in the mountains or isolated lighthouse keepers, and the like. Of course, her design in this is to compel the individual to seek his fellows and to try to gain their good will by cooperating with them and conforming to the regulations necessary for the welfare of all. There is probably no force in human life of such driving power as the desire for social intercourse. The Child Must Be Made Socially Efficient. — It follows that it is of supreme importance for any child to be trained so that he will be socially efficient, in the sense that he will have an under- standing of human nature, that he will be eager to cooperate with his fellows, that he will SOCIAL TRAINING 123 sympathize with them, and that he will gain pleasure from association with them. A child who acquires anti-social traits so that he will irri- tate people or arouse their animosity because of his greed or indifference to their interests, or w^ho will not try to contribute to the pleasure of others is certain to have an unhappy life ; and not only will he be unhappy himself, but he will cause unhappiness among those with whom he comes in contact. One meets such persons fre- quently. They show in the expression of their countenances and in their bearing that they are not solving the problems of life. They are under strain and stress much of the time because they are conscious of an unceasing struggle to main- tain themselves in the face of condemnation by their associates. People often break down under this strain. Social isolation is the cause not only of extreme mental distress, but it is the inciting cause of physical disorders. One cannot be physically at his best if he is not in happy rela- tions with his fellows. One who is conscious of being the object of criticism, or distrust, or censure, or neglect cannot avoid depression, and this will slow down all the vital processes. In time the individual will fall a victim to some physical disease simply because he does not have vitality enough to resist the invasion of disease germs, which are ready to establish themselves in any organism when the \dtalities are low. 124 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING Social Traimng Should Begin Early. — The social training of the child should commence the moment he begins to feel the difference between persons and objects, as when he smiles in re- sponse to the salutation of his father, mother, brother, or sister. Thereafter he will con- stantly strive to be with people. He mil cry to have his mother stay with him or take him with her wherever she goes.' A four or five- months-old child will not stay alone if he can induce father, mother, brother, or sister to stay with him by squalling when they leave him. In his instinctive way he tries to win them by smil- ing at them and entertaining them with vocal play. A normal year-old child shows beyond any doubt that he derives his chief pleasure from social relations and activities. It is true that he will gain some pleasure from his blocks, his ball, his rattle, his pet dog or kitten, and what not, but the pleasure derived from these sources is slight compared with that which he experiences when he is with his mother, father, brother, or sister. As he develops, his social interest and his social need enlarge and in due time he will crave intercourse with others besides members of his own family. He will particularly wish to be with children of about his own age because they have interests like his own. They wish to do what he wishes to do so there is no conflict between thorn. SOCIAL TRAINING 125 If his mother, father, brother, or sister can and will do what he likes to do then he will choose to be with them rather than with those of his own age because they can help him to do more things that he wishes to do than can any- one of his own age. Not infrequently one sees a two- or three- or four-year-old child who prefers to play with an adult, — it may be father, mother, aunt or uncle, or even a neighbor, rather than with one of his own age, because this adult can be as a child in his spontaneity and playful inter- est and at the same time be as a groA\Ti-up person in resourcefulness. The ideal playmate for a child is one who while genuinely spontaneous and playful is at the same time capable of doing many things which the child himself cannot do. II The Chief Need of the Child. — The chief need of the child is to play freely because through play he develops body and mind. He does not know he is developing himself when he plays, but Nature understands the matter very well, and she has taken pains to implant in the child such a passion for play that nothing will stop it, not even the most unsympathetic and harsh parent. If persons will not play Avith him then he will play with pets if he can find them. If there is no living thing which will cooperate with him in his 126 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING play then he will endow inanimate objects with life and he will carry on his play with them. Play he must, no matter what kind of environment he is in; but it will be fortunate for him if he is surrounded by persons who can take his point of view and help him to indulge his passion for play. It was said above that play is essential to the development of mind and body ; but it also affords opportunity for the child to strengthen his social tendencies and to enlarge the range of his social understanding and social interests. In his play he will leam that all people have needs and desires like his own. They, too, wish to play and there must be give-and-take. One cannot do as he wishes unless others can do as they wish. One must help others to realize their desires if he is to receive their help in the attain- ment of his own desires. The year-old child can begin to leam the lesson of give-and-take in social relationships. His parents and his brothers and sisters will play his little games with him, and they will impress upon him that each must take his turn and no one will be allowed to have the best of everything always. He will be very slow in connecting the lack of restraint and his thoughtlessness with the pain which they create in others and the penalty he suffers by forfeiting his association with them, or possibly even by being punished by them; but if the lesson is SOCIAL TRAINING 127 continued every day without varying or relapse he will learn it in due time. This is the greatest social lesson he can learn and it is the para- mount duty of those who are charged with his care and culture to teach it to him. He will never learn it, however, unless he begins his learning almost as soon as he shows that he likes to be with people. Tlie First Fault to Be Avoided. — There are three chief faults which parents, brothers and sisters, aunts and uncles, and all who come in contact with a young child should be on their guard to avoid. First of all, there is danger that the child in present-day life will not learn that in the measure that he gives so will he receive. Parents, brothers and sisters and relatives have more leisure now than they had formerly to serve the child, and they have a tendency to do this without exacting any service from him. One frequently sees children five, six, seven years of age or older who apparently think that it is the business of every one around them to help them to have a good time. They have no consciousness that they should help others to find enjoyment. They constantly make demands upon all the members of their family to serve them while they give nothing in return. Children brought up under servants are peculiarly liable to acquire this attitude toward people about them. But one sees children who are socially spoiled in 128 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING homes where there are no servants. The parents fail to teach the children early that they must serve as well as be served; that they must think of others as well as have others think of them. Nature has wisely filled a mother's heart with affection for her children, so that she will sacri- fice all things for their welfare. This over- powering affection leads her to forgive her chil- dren for their shortcomings and to overlook their selfishness. It is fortunate that the child makes such a profound appeal to the mother, for other- wise he would have a hard time of it indeed dur- ing his first months. But while nature has thus wisely endowed the mother with all-embrac- ing love for her children, it would have been better if nature had equipped the mother so that she could control her affection by her reason when her children need social training. The mother who can keep in view the future social activities of her children will see that during the early years it is necessary at times to have them suifer the consequences of selfish action in order that they may learn how to restrain their selfishness. Harshness vs. Indulgence in Social Training. — In an older day parents were too harsh with their young children. They repressed their spontaneity. The children always had to defer to the parents. Under such conditions there could not be ardent friendship between the parents and their children. The children might SOCIAL TRAINING 129 obey the parents while they were in the home but they could not love them. They were not much influenced in their desires by them. They did not like to be with them when they could be with any one else, so they would run away to the neighbors ; and when they reached the teens they would sometimes run away from home altogether. Parents used to be disciplinarians rather than friends with their children. But friendliness between children and parents has been constantly growing. In some cases it has gone so far that parents fail to restrain the children or have them suffer the results of their selfishness and thoughtlessness. It is probably just as harmful to the child's social develop- ment to have the parents overlook his mean and selfish and domineering action as to suppress his spontaneity and keep him in a constant attitude of fear. The wise course lies somewhere between these extremes ; the parent should at all hazards retain the friendship and good will of his chil- dren, but he should try at the same time to have them learn the lesson of fair play in their social relations. Ill The Second Fault to Be Avoided, — The second fault to be avoided in social training is the fail- ure of -parents to be sympathetic with and re- sponsive to the child in his spontaneous expres- 130 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING sion. In mature life the individual who is spon- taneous and responsive and who can play the social game fair is the one who gets the most out of his social relations because he gives the greatest pleasure to the people with whom he is associated. Now, it is a fine problem to keep a child spontaneous and responsive and at the same time have him form habits of restraining his selfish and domineering impulses. No one can train a child in this way who is not himself spon- taneous and responsive and fair in his social relations ; and a trainer must have the welfare of the child and not his own ease at heart. He must not suppress a child who is spontaneous just because he himself likes ease. On the other hand, he must not indulge a child in actions which later on will arouse the antagonism of people just because he cannot endure to have the child denied any pleasure which he craves. A parent who will always keep the future welfare of the child in mind will not be likely to go far astray in his training, providing, of course, that he remembers that the young child is impulsive and tends to rush headlong in the direction in which he wishes to go without regard to consequences. The Third Fault to Be Avoided. — One who has an opportunity to study a large body of young people in their social relations can hardly fail to become impressed with the fact that those who have had too much '^ party'' activity in the SOCIAL TRAINING 131 early years are apt later on to lose their interest in people, except in a small exclusive group. They become socially blase. They will not attend social functions of a democratic character. They pooh- pooh at church sociables and all general social gatherings. They do not speak well of human beings as such. In listening to their talk about people, one would get the impression that the typical man or woman is no more interesting than a dog or a horse. Here is a concrete instance. A boy, now twenty years of age, was brought up in a home in which there was an excess of social activity. People were constantly coming into the house for parties, and the boy had always to partici- pate in these social functions. His parents liked to show him off. He would often be the topic of conversation whenever guests were present. He did not much enjoy this sort of thing, but his parents thought he needed the training, and they insisted upon his being present on every social occasion, and making himself agreeable to guests. As a matter of fact, he was not very agreeable, but the parents apparently thought this was the reason why he should be compelled to participate in all their social life. They thought he would grow up boorish and unsocial if left to follow his own choice in this matter. The parents gave a number of children's parties -each year for this boy. AVlien he was 132 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING eleven he began to have dancing parties, and he attended dances given by the parents of the chil- dren in his ^^set.'' There were other kinds of parties, too ; and when people were not coming to his house, he was generally going to somebody else's house. By the time he reached the teens he frequently would rebel against going to some of the parties, but the mother felt he needed the experience, and so she always made him go when- ever he had an invitation. But now when he is away from his parents* influence he scoffs at every kind of democratic social function. He belongs to a small fraternity of young fellows who do not enjoy general social activities. They must have something very stimulating socially in order to awaken their interest at all. Most people are too tame and commonplace for them. They ripened up socially too early, and they have already gone to seed. Hunger for Social Contact. — On the other hand, one who can study large groups of young men and women will have plenty of opportunity to see that, allowing for exceptions, those who did not get their till of social life in the early years continue to have a desire for it now. They are, as a rule, hungry for social intercourse. People are interesting to them, and they make themselves agreeable to others. They are not in the least blase socially, and they probably never will be. This is the sort of person who. SOCIAL TRAINING 133 when mature, is a good friend, wlio is interested in the welfare of the people around him, and who gives pleasure to others as well as getting pleas- ure out of life for himself. Of course, a child ought to have enough social activity so that he will acquire ease when he is in the presence of others. If he is kept too much from people of his own age, as w^ell as those older than himself, he may be self-conscious and embarrassed in contact with people when he comes to maturity. One does see young men and women of this sort. They are afraid of people. They do not know how to express them- selves when they are in company, and so they are usually silent. In consequence of this they do not add much to the pleasure of the people around them, and they are usually more or less unhappy themselves, because they realize they are socially incapable. This is perhaps as un- fortunate for a young person as to be blase in regard to social matters. IV ^^ Brotherly Love/' — Turning now to the social training which brothers and sisters give each other it may be noted first that there are two profound impulses which conflict with one another in every family. One leads individual members of the family to look out first for them- 134 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING selves and to secure whatever they wish without much regard to the interests or needs of others. This is the cause of much rivalry and conflict even in families in which there is an abundance of the things that all desire. Acting on this impulse, brothers and sisters tend to criticise one another without much restraint. This is the case particularly when there are two or three boys in a family who have substantially^ the same circle of friends, or go to the same school, or participate in the same games. The typical boy up to the age of nineteen or twenty will be more critical of his brother than he will be of an outsider; he will often condemn his brother soundly for holding views or performing acts which he will entirely overlook in a boy in another family who is his companion. This biological impulse urges members of a family to go off along their own independent routes quite early. Nature seems to have de- signed it so that there should be intermingling of families rather than that the members of one family should stick together in an isolated, ex- clusive way. Out of this tendency has grown human society as we know it. There could not be anything like social unity on a large scale if the members of a family did not form strong attach- ments outside of the family. This seems to be a comprehensive law in the animal world. At some point in the course of their development all SOCIAL TRAINING 135 young animals are seized with a passion to get away from tlie nest, or the lair, or the den, and strike out into the world. The second impulse operating in every family, in conflict with the first impulse but developed later than it, is the fraternal one. This leads the members of the family to cooperate, to be friends instead of rivals. The chief effort of most parents is to develop good will and brotherly love among their children, for it is distressing to them to observe rivalry and antag- onism between the members of their flock. Usu- ally a parent cannot understand why brothers and sisters should ever be indifferent or harsh toward one another. What the parent may often overlook in a child, a brother or sister will seize upon and make the most of so as to annoy or hector him. Also what a parent enjoys in a child as a naive or clever expression may often be ridiculed by a brother or sister. Further, what a parent may admire in a child in the way of self-expression and independence of judgment may be to the brothers and sisters much like a red rag in a poultry yard. At the same time, brothers who are in conflict a considerable part of the time when they are kept together within their home are likely to hold together when they get out in the world and meet antagonists. A boy may quarrel incessantly with his brother when there are no enemies to be faced, but when 136 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING the enemy does come he will join with his brother and defend him. Rivalry in a Family. — Many parents do not like to have their children separated from one another or go their several ways independ- ently. They wish them always to go to the same places together and engage in the same activities. Parents will keep two brothers together in the same school, for instance, and in the same classes, in the belief that they will help each other and become more firmly attached to each other. But the brothers may become critical of actions and impressions in one another which they would not notice in their friends. It would be better as a rule if the brothers were in different classes and even in different schools. The best way to de- velop and preserve brotherly love in a family is to arrange it so that when the various mem- bers come together each can contribute something fresh and original which will awaken the interest and win the admiration of the others. The period for most active rivalry among boys in a family extends from the age of three or four into the teens. During the latter part of the teens the appreciation of community inter- ests in a family develops. A\^en this time arrives brothers are likely to be the best of friends, espe- cially if they are not kept constantly together in school and out, confined to the same interests and companions during the early teens. SOCIAL TRAINING 137 Parents should take a biological view of the situation, and when they do they will not be much disturbed by the rivalry and conflict among their children. Parents should further consider that their children will in maturity have to form connections with people in the world, and they had better begin doing this reasonably early. Even if a parent could bring up a child so that he would have no interest in persons outside of the home, but would be wholly content with the companionship of his brothers and sisters, it would be wrong to train him this way. It would unfit him for the real life he must live. A Boy Will Not Endure Being '^ Bossed^' by a Brother. — There is another aspect of this matter of brotherly love. It is suggested by the complaint of a certain mother who says her son, four years of age, prefers his collie dog to his brother and sister, eleven and seven years of age, respectively. She would like to have the children play together in a fraternal way, but the four-year-old will go out with his collie and have a good time whenever he gets the chance. The mother thinks this is a rather serious fault in the boy. Inquiry has shown that the older boy does not treat his brother very well. He domineers over him. He will not play the games which the younger boy likes particularly. He will play only the games in which he can use or exploit 138 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING the younger boy. He will play horse with him, for instance, and use the whip pretty freely so long as the horse will stand it. The younger boy will endure this for a reasonable length of time, but then he will rebel. In the house the older boy insists upon having his own way about games or he will go off and read by himself. As for the sister, she is ^* touchy." She does not want anyone to ^^fool with her things." So she snaps a good deal at the younger boy when he is around her. The parents rather side with her in any contest, partly because she is a girl, but mainly because she is the youngest in the family. Quite naturally, then, the younger boy will much of the time prefer his collie dog to his brother and sister. The collie will play with him whenever he wishes. The dog will not domineer over the boy or bully him. He can have a good time with his dog because he can express himself freely. He is not continually exploited on the one hand or scolded on the other. This is why he chooses his dog as a playmate over his brother and sister. No normal human being, young or old, will gladly endure continuous repression or exploita- tion. Everyone tries to choose his companions according as they will give him freedom and opportunity to express himself. No person will voluntarily select as a companion anyone who SOCIAL TRAINING 139 habitnally bullies him or will not play the game with him in a give-and-take manner, but who in- sists upon gratifying his own desires on every occasion. Unless a mother can devise games, plays, and occupations in which all children can take a part, and in which each will have a fair chance to express his individuality and his desires, then she cannot make them good friends one of another. Considering the special case mentioned at the outset, it would be better for the mother to let the four-year-old play with his collie than to force him to play with either his brother or his sister. When Parents Hector One Another, — In some families the father and mother are constantly correcting one another in respect to unimportant details and this has a bad influence on the social training of the children. If the father says inci- dentally that the snow is six inches deep, for instance, the mother may say, ^^Oh, no! It is not more than five and a half inches.'' If the mother says that the hardest wind of the season blew last night, the father may say that it was not as hard as the wind that blew a week ago, and so on. Hardly any statement can be made by one that is not questioned or modified by the other. People sometimes get into a habit of hectoring one another in this way, which develops irritable relations in a family. 140 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING It is instinctive in many persons to humiliate other people by pointing- out their shortcomings, whether intellectual, physical, social, ethical, or temperamental. This instinct comes from afar, from our remote ancestors, in fact. Among primitive people hectoring is a prominent sport; hector or be hectored is the law of life among them. The one who can bully others most effectively will have an advantage. If he can irritate them he can get the better of them physically. If he can humiliate them he can rise above them socially. We have reached the time now, though, when this sort of thing is extremely irritating, but still many husbands and wives keep it up. They would not humiliate strangers or exhibit their carping traits at a dinner party, but they will do so constantly in their own family. When this practice gets established in a family it sets one member against another. People who hector each other cannot be good fellows and chums together. One can never find a cooper- ative or harmonious life in such families. One member will be constantly tripping up the others in any statement that is made. No matter what the subject of conversation may be, let one mem- ber take one position and another will uphold the opposite view. Independence vs, Captiousness, — While this captious and disputatious attitude should be SOCIAL TRAINING 141 frowned upon in a family, still parents ought to encourage originality and independence in the discussion of matters of vital importance. If a child should make the statement, for instance, that our country ought to require every person between the ages of eighteen and thirty-five to have military training, and another child should take exception to this, it will be of advantage to all members of the family to have the subject discussed in a fair-minded way. If parents begin early enough, they can help their children to cultivate an independent but at the same time fair attitude in the discussion of any question that may arise. Parents should sit in judg- ment upon the method of discussion of their children. If one mem^ber of the family is inclined to be merely contentious, but not to present his views in a fair way, then he ought to be decided * against, and the judgment of the whole family should be secured against him. It is a good train- ing for a child to receive the hostile sentiments of the members of the family if in his talk he seeks to humiliate or to take unfair advantage of his contestant. Sometimes a boy in a family will seek to cast ridicule upon a brother or sister by the tone of the voice, or expression of the face, or calling names, and so on. The more soundly he is condemned for this by the entire family the better it will be for him and for all who have to associate with him. 142 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING Choosing Companions. — An infant shows but slight inclination to discriminate between his associates; but before the close of the second year he manifests a desire to be with certain of the persons about him rather than with others. The year-old child is apt to show clearly that he would rather be with his father than with his mother, or vice versa. He is likely to choose his sister rather than his brother, or the other way ^round. As he develops, this discrimination be- tween persons becomes ever more marked. The five-year-old boy is very decided in his choice of associates, and the one quality more than any other which he demands in a companion is that he should be resourceful in ^^ doing things,'* in leading in new games or tricks, or in undertaking new adventures. Among boys from four or five years up to eighteen or twenty, intellectual superiority as measured by school work is not rated high as a quality in the choice of a companion. The boy who has the highest marks in school is generally not a favorite on the playground, unless at the same time he has courage, skill, and ingenuity in the games he plays. For a boy to be excellent in books is no recommendation to his fellows for comradeship. Nor does the typical group of boys regard moral excellence in one of their number SOCIAL TRAINING 143 as a quality of much consequence. The boy who stands first in the school or in deportment is often marked lowest in good-fellowship by his ^'set," because he is likely to be static — a ^^ sissy *' — without ability as a leader. Ordinarily the qualities which count for the most in many a home and schoolroom count for the least in the rather rough, dramatic, and dynamic life of the playground or of the street. It is not much different with young girls. They, too, wish as companions those who can **do things. '^ But of course, they are not as rough and muscular in their interests as boys, so that they can the more readily appreciate charac- teristics which lead to excellence in studies and in conduct. A boy rather scorns a ** well-be- haved'' fellow of his own age; but this is not usually the case with a girl. Often in groups of girls from nine or ten years on, the one who stands highest in the school is the leader of her ^^set,'' but very rarely is this the case with boys. Neither Wealth Nor Social Station Is Consid- ered in Choosing Companions. — Wealth does not count for much in determining companionship among young boys. Dress plays little if any part in the companionship of boys until they are past the teens. The social status of parents is not considered. As a matter of fact, boys would obliterate all class distinctions if they could have their way, and they would establish a social sys- 144 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING tern based on superiority in muscular and heroic qualities. The indifference of the typical boy up to seventeen or eighteen to the ordinary social stratifications in his community is shown in his readiness to choose a colored boy as a com- panion, if the latter excels in athletics or in some other concrete and interesting activity. If he be clever at making interesting things, as a boat, for instance, or in playing the guitar, or in sing- ing familiar songs, he is likely to become a favor- ite with the boys. But when girls come to the teens, the social lines drawn by their parents begin to make cleavages among them. The conventions of society press down upon the girl much more than they do upon the boy. Early in the teens dress becomes an important factor in determining her comradeships. The boy igTiores all outward evi- dences of social status, but society forces these things upon the girPs attention. One can see groupings of girls in the eighth grade, say, or in the high school, formed on the basis of the social caste of their parents, when no such groupings could exist among the boys of the same families. Adults as Companions of the Young. — When it comes to the child's choice of associates among adults, what he wants is a companion, not an adviser. Companionship means give-and-take relations. Companionship is impossible between two people when one individual feels himself SOCIAL TRAINING 145 above or beneath the other, so that he must be either austere and autocratic, or humble and sub- servient. When the child is overawed by an adult he cannot find pleasure in his presence, and so he will not choose him as a companion. The parent or teacher who wins the good will of children must enter into their games and play his part like any other member of the group, so that all may feel perfectly free to express themselves according to their interests and their capacities. But when a parent or teacher comes into a group and sets up inhibitions and restraints in its mem- bers, he cannot be regarded as a favorite. On the contrary, he will be avoided by the group whenever possible. The natural leader of the young is the one who can do many things in such a way as to interest children, and so to set models for them to imitate. It is hardly necessary to say that the great scholar or great moralist is never a favorite with children, on the basis simply of his intellect or his conduct. Ordinarily a minister is not a favorite with the young of any age, because he is apt to suggest too great restraint, which is always displeasing to the young. Sometimes an adult tries to make himself agreeable to children, but they may instantly recognize that he is doing it for a purpose, and is not genuine in it. The result is that he is not acceptable as an associate no matter how much he may wdsh to be. 146 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING He tends to break up the group solidarity, and so is regarded as an *^ outsider.'' The one essential for a parent, if he wishes to be a leader among his children in their spon- taneous life, is that he shall cultivate qualities which will not make him appear to be an ^'out- sider." No person who is not felt to be a real member of a group, at least for the time being, and to have a genuine interest in its activities, and some ability to take part in them, can win the confidence of the group, or have much influ- ence with it. VI The Child 's Passion to Win. — It will be impos- sible for any one to train a child in his social relations who does not understand that the pas- sion to win in all contests is' planted very deep in human nature. A concrete instance will illus- trate this trait: Two old men, both of whom passed the three- score-and-ten mark over a decade ago, spend some time every day playing checkers and back- gammon together. They always begin their games in a friendly spirit but they usually break up in bad feeling, saying sharp things to each other, and accusing each other of having taken an unfair advantage. To one looking on it seems very foolish for these two octogenarians to quarrel about their games. But they take the SOCIAL TRAINING 147 matter seriously. They are as eager to win a game of checkers or back-gammon now as they were eager to win their wrestling and running and climbing and swimming and other contests seventy years ago. This incident is typical of what may be ob- served in the relations of people at every age, almost from the cradle to the grave. These two old men who have lost most of their other impulses have retained the passion to win in their contests. The passion appears very early in life and it outlasts most other interests. It has been implanted very deep in human nature. It is the spur to most of the effort which anyone puts forth in life, and it is the cause of practically all the competitive struggles and most of the conflict and unhappiness in life. The passion to win in any and every kind of competitive experiences reaches its height by the third or fourth year and continues unabated practically to the end of life. A normal four^ year-old child is rarely if every willing to be defeated if he can prevent it in any contest with his fellows. He will exert himself to the limit to get ahead in his races, to be it in ball games, to climb trees faster and higher than any of his fellows, to yell louder, to throw farther and straighter, to jump higher and so on than any of his rivals. It is this impulse which spurs him on to develop his talents. It stimulates him in 148 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING school to reach the head of the class. If he does not feel this driving force he will be likely to be found at the foot of his class all the time. In high school and college the wish to be first in any activity leads to the development of superior ability in debating, in music, in literary work, in class work and the like. If this impulse should be left out of an individuaPs life he would be a useless piece of luggage. The Passion to Win in Arguments. — The pas- sion to win is manifested as vigorously and tena- ciously in arguments as in any games or plays. Observe two persons of any age from the fourth year on to the grave arguing on some topic. It will soon become apparent that the debaters are not seeking to find out the truth in respect to the matter concerning which they disagree. Each is trying to win over his adversary. Each exerts himself to talk faster or louder or to use phrases or illustrations which will overcome his antag- onist. Frequently one has to sit by while a father or mother argues a question with a child. The parents think they are engaged in a worthy undertaking in striving to lead the child into the light, but the chances are that they are more eager to succeed in the contest than they are to dispel error from the child's mind. It is certain that the child is chiefly concerned about winning. His instincts urge him to resist being overcome even by his parents. Nature seems to say, ^'De- SOCIAL TRAINING 149 fend yourself. Don't give way in an argument any more than you would give way in a wrestling match or in a fistic encounter with a rival. Assert yourself; no matter whether you are right or wrong, stand up for whatever you have said or done.*' Contest Betiveen Parents and Children. — Parents are often unwise in continuing an argu- ment with a child when it is apparent that it has degenerated into a mere struggle to see who can win. Parents do not make a mistake in this regard, though, any more frequently than teachers do. Recently the writer listened to an argument between a teacher and a pupil. ^ The teacher was probably in the right, but it was impossible to convince the pupil, who was in such a frame of mind that his intellect had ceased to work effectively upon the problem under consid- eration. His whole being was concentrated on one thing, and that to defend himself, to come out ahead of the teacher in the argument so that he might be superior in the eyes of his fellows. It was not now a question of reasonableness; it was a matter of succeeding by any means. Is not this instance typical of much that is occurring in daily life not only in the attitude of children toward one another, but in the relations of adults with children and with one another? Argument of this sort usually reaches a point where the reasonableness plays practically no part in it. 150 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING The situation ceases to be one in which the con- testants are searching for trnth. They are simply competing as in a game of tag. The wise teacher will not keep up an argument with a pupil when he sees that the point has been reached where reason cannot prevail. The moment that the com- petitive instinct begins to dominate he will stop his argument and will say to himself, ^*We will look at this tomorrow when the instinct is perhaps allayed; when there is no incitement for the pupils to resist seeing things as they are.'' Turning the Passion to Good Use. — It was inti- mated above that the impulse to win serves a useful purpose; it stimulates a child to develop his talents to their fullest capability. It can be put to excellent use in encouraging a child to compete with himself. Many schools are now adopting the plan of stimulating pupils by com- peting with themselves so that they will try to improve their records in their studies and reci- tations. Suppose a pupil has made a record of *^fair'* in his arithmetic. That is a mark for him to excel. He becomes his own competitor in a sensie. Instead of trying to beat the record of some one else he endeavors to beat his own record. He frequently does this spontaneously in his physical activities, for instance, in throwing at a mark, or jumping over a bar, or performing on a trapeze. The older the child grows the more effectively he can be stimulated in competing SOCIAL TRAINING 151 with himself in establishing better records in every activity in which he is interested. One can observe older boys and men playing on a golf links day after day trying to beat their previous score. This trait should be encouraged in the home and in the school. Clear, definite records should be kept of a child's accomplishment in any sub- ject or in any activity whatsoever, and the scores made from week . to week or month to month should be compared. A normal child will be greatly stimulated to do his best if in looking over his record he finds that he is slipping back- ward. A large proportion of persons will be equally stimulated if they can see that they are gaining; it is a source of inspiration for anyone to observe that he is making improvement in any activity which he is scoring. The Passion to Be a Leader. — The passion to win is closely allied to another passion which is very profound in childhood ; the passion to be the chief or most active or most resourceful member of a group. A concrete instance will bring the matter before us: Five children ranging from three to eight years of age are examining a complex object, the con- struction and use of which they do not under- stand. The object was given by an electrician to a boy seven years of age. He has brought it into the group and has begun to examine it with a 152 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING view to determining how it is put together and how it works. He is intensely interested in his task, and he keeps saying, ^^This is the way it works. Now I see how it is made. I am sure I can take it apart," etc., etc. Meanwhile the other children are giving concentrated attention to what the boy is doing. Each child is telling him what he should do. They are as excited over the mystery as he is himself. Their advice annoys him and he keeps calling to them to **keep still,'' to ^^let me alone." He can solve the puzzle, he thinks, if they will simply look at him and not instruct him; but his remonstrances have practi- cally no effect upon the other children. They keep reaching for the object and saying, **Let me take it"; **I see what to do with it"; *^I can show you how to handle it," and so on. Finally the oldest child does get it away from its orig- inal possessor but not with the latter 's consent. He protests, saying that if they will ^*keep their hands off" he will soon have the mystery un- raveled. But they cannot restrain themselves, though they do not intend to be disagreeable. They are all the best of friends, cooperating with one another in their enterprises, but now they are so dominated by the passion to take a hand in solving this problem that they are not aware that they are rude. Considerations of propriety, respect, ownership and everything of the kind are temporarily held in abeyance. SOCIAL TRAINING 153 The one thing that fills consciousness is the determination to solve that mystery. The most aggressive member of the group plays the principal role in manipulating the object, but every member is eager to get the thing into his own hands, believing that he can do what the others are unable to do. This scene is typical of situations that are aris- ing constantly among normal children and prob- ably even among adults, though the latter have, of course, acquired greater power of self-control, which means that particular ideas or interests cannot gain complete mastery of them. In the normal adult consideration of propriety, etc., will restrain an impulse to grab an interesting object away from another individual; but it is different with the child. One can see children who ordi- narily have the most delightful relations toward their parents but who are wholly unrestrained when they are interested in some object or some undertaking. They are practically hypnotized by anything which appeals to them strongly, and so it gains control of all the avenues of their thought and their action. Nature evidently implanted this impulse to master difficulties for a useful end. If a child were content to sit by while others took the initi- ative in solving problems what would he gain therefrom I It is a simple principle of psychology that an individual can understand and appreci- 154 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAININC- ate only what he does for himself. Mere looking on while others do things will not yield under- standing. In the group described above, every child when he was acting as an onlooker was sure he knew how to solve the problem; but when he tried to solve it he discovered that he had not perceived accurately. Error can be de- tected only by putting it to the test. So, while this great passion of the child to be self-active in solving the mysteries about him often brings him into conflict with people, nevertheless it is his only safeguard against feeble-mindedness. One who appreciates the profound character of this passion and sees its significance in mental devel- opment will seek only to guide never to repress or prohibit its manifestations. CHAPTER V FIRST STEPS IN LANGUAGE TRAINING Voice Play and Learning to Speak. — The young of all creatures, human and animal, play for a longer or shorter period in their develop- ment. The longer the period the higher point they reach when they become mature. The play period is a learning and practice period. The kitten chasing a spool or a tassel on the floor is learning and practicing the activities required for the capture of prey. The same is true in prin- ciple of the puppy that is engaged in make- believe combat with the mother or with another puppy. So nature commands the child to re- hearse in his play the activities he will need to perform when he enters into the game of life. As it happens, he practices some activities which he will not need to perform in mature life; but nature takes no chances. She says, **Play at everything that people around you do, or that your ancestors have done, because you may have to do these things when you are grown. ' ' Voice play is one aspect of the general activity 155 156 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING of play. The typical nine-months-old child ought to he engaged in voice play a good part of his waking hours. If you will listen to this play you will note that he is spontaneously trying many of the sounds and intonations he will use in speech later on. In this way he develops his vocal powers for the very complicated work to be per- formed a few years later. The child who does not pass through this period of voice play mil not acquire speech except in a very rudimentary and imperfect way. It is a bad sign when a young child does not indulge in voice play. The Easier Sounds Are First Made. — Children usually do not make an articulate word until the tenth month. Before this they indulge in voice play freely, but the sounds they make are not organized words, they are mainly variations and combinations of a, e, e and o. These vowels are made without the use of tongue, lips, or palate, and so are the easiest sounds to produce. The first articulate word, Comprising consonantal and vowel sounds, used by children is something like md-md. It happens in this way: The pre- dominant note in the early months resembles close- ly a. Now, when the child is taking his food he is likely to be a-ing constantly, and as he closes and opens his mouth the stream of a sound be- comes deflected and modified so that it appears to be something like ma. An infant cannot make a clear-cut m sound as the pcirent can, but he LANGUAGE TRAINING 157 makec a sound resembling it, and the parent interprets it to be the m sound, and thinks the child is saying md-md. The next consonantal sound to appear resembles p. The child is lying in his cradle engaged in voice play, and he blows out against his lips, at the same time uttering the d sound. When the lips open the result is an explosion resembling pd-pd, though in the begin- ning the child cannot make a clear-cut p sound. In much the same way the h sound becomes at- tached to the d sound, which results in hd-hd, ''Bahtj Talk.''— This is the way the child takes his first steps in making articulate words; but once started he pushes on rapidly until at four, sometimes earlier, he is capable of making all the sounds in their ordinary combinations in his native speech. Of course, there are children who do not master the more difficult combinations until they are six or even seven years old. Feeble- minded children never make them. During the early period of learning it is impossible for the child to make such sounds as k when final, as in milk, or ng in morning, so he v*dll omit them in all the words he uses. For instance, he will say mi for '^milk,'' leaving off both the I and the k sounds. He may not execute all the sounds in ^^milk" in their right order until he is three-and- a-half or four years of age. Most children of eighteen months will omit g on the ends of all words ending in "ing.'' They will substitute 158 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING other sounds for th, fl, sp, and so on, or omit them altogether. Thus **that'' will be made ''dat''; ^^spof' will be ''pot''; ^^flowers'' will be ''fowers''; ^^run'' may be ''glun'' or simply ''un''; '^drink'' may be ''ding'' or "dinJc"; * ^ Christmas ' ' is likely to be "ismas^^ or ^'Chlis- mas^^ or ''hismas^^; ^^hold'* may be "ho"; "\qV^ may be "et"; ^^come*' may be simply "cu," In the early months the child mutilates practi- cally every word containing any relatively hard vocal combinations. But if he develops normally he will gain more precise control over his vocal organs so that he can produce even the most intricate combinations. Idiots use only rudi- mentary words containing mainly vowels, prob- ably because the nervous mechanisms necessary to manipulate the organs of speech in a highly coordinated way do not develop. An old person whose nervous system is declining usually falls back to the condition of infancy, so that he can- not execute the difficult combinations in words. The very old man may say mi for ^^milk/' as he did when he first tried it at ten months of age, perhaps. He will leave off all the ng's on words, and may say puddin' for ^ Spudding,*' for ex- ample. One never hears the ng final sound in the speech of a person who is drunk; all words of any difficulty are mutilated because the nervous centers that control vocal coordinations are dis- turbed, either temporarily or permanently. LANGUAGE TRAINING 159 ^^Baby Talk'' and Speech Defects. — By the time the child has reached his third birthday, all these mutilations should have disappeared, if he develops normally. If he still retains his ^^baby talk'^ it is an indication that he is not gaining mastery of speech in quite the right way, and he should be given some special attention. The first thing to da is to avoid using "baby talk'^ in speaking to him; a parent should always pre- vent people from using mutilated words in talk- ing to his child. The next thing to do is to look into the child's physical condition. Does he have adenoids! Is he tongue-tied? Does he have enlarged tonsils or enlarged glands? Is his palate properly formed? Are the nasal passages open, or are they obstructed by congested condi- tions or misplaced bony structures! In some cases the tongue is so thick that the child seems to be unable to use it to make the more difficult consonant sounds. But the chief difficulty is likely to be found in the nasal passages where there may be obstruc- tion by adenoids, or a deflected septum, or some- thing of the kind. Any condition of this sort ought to be remedied, alike for the correction of speech difficulties and for the improvement of the general health. The chances are that a child who is normal physically will grow through the period of speech mutilation, and will reproduce correctly 160 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING all the sounds in the language without special instruction. But occasionally a child is found who is normal physically and mentally, but who persists in using mutilated words. With such children, special instruction is desirable. These children must be taught how to place the vocal apparatus in making the sounds which give trouble. Take the th sound, for instance. A parent can help a normal three-year-old child by showing it how the vocal organs are placed in sounding th in ^^ through,'' for example, or in *^this" or ^^that.'' A one-year-old child cannot imitate the position of the vocal apparatus in making particular sounds, but a typical three- year-old child can make this imitation, at least to some extent. Easy and Difficult Sounds. — The sounds that are made in the front of the mouth, so to speak, so that the child can see the position of the tongue, teeth and lips, can be more easily imi- tated than sounds that are made in the back of the mouth; but even these latter sounds, as, for instance, g in ^ Spudding'' can be taught to a normal three-year-old child who habitually omits them. These sounds cannot be effectively taught simply by pronouncing them to a child. He must see the vocal organs in position and in action. If necessary, he must feel them with his fingers so that he will have something definite to imi- tate. A child cannot imitate the mere sound of Boys who have opportunities for occupation of this sort do not g-et into mischief. Children should have a thorough physical examin< twice each year. :ion at least LANGUAGE TRAINING 161 a word as readily as the movement of the vocal apparatus which he can see or feel. This principle is recognized to-day in teaching adults a foreign language. Every good teacher now gives phonic lessons at the beginning of the study of a foreign language. The student ac- quires the sounds of the language largely by imitating the movements of the vocal apparatus of his teacher. He may never get the more subtle sounds of the foreign language if the teacher simply pronounces words and depends upon his scholar to imitate them through hearing alone. If the readers of these lines, who have not thought of these matters, will try themselves to imitate the speech of a foreigner whose language they do not speak, they will quickly realize that it is practically impossible to reproduce strange words that are simply heard. In the language of psychology, one cannot form a clear auditory image of words with which he is unfamiliar. Not until he has had experience in speaking such words will the ear give distinct images of them. Correcting Errors in Speech. — Sometimes normal children fail to acquire the correct pro- nunciation of a word even when they hear it cor- rectly pronounced. A parent ought to watch for this and try to prevent the child from settling down on a mutilated form. To illustrate : suppose a five-year-old says mornun for ^^ morn- ing." The sooner the parent can lead him to 162 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING sound the ing correctly the better; the longer he says mornun the greater difficulty there will be in establishing the correct pronunciation. And how can it be done! The child probably does not notice a difference between the ending of the word as he speaks it and as other people speak it. It is a psychological law that people, young or old, tend to hear words spoken as they speak them; a man with a brogue thinks he speaks as his associates do. The parent may help the child to correct his fault by showing him how the vocal organs are placed in executing ing. A typical five-year-old child will be interested in trying to see what he can do in making difficult vocal combinations.' As soon as he catches the cue of how to place his organs of speech, he will be interested in the undertaking as a sort of game. When he masters the ing combination then the mother can lead him to use it in pro- nouncing ^'morning,'' say, and other words in w^hich it occurs. It will be necessary to encourage the child for some time to induce him to abandon the old pronunciation, but it can be done if the parent will have patience. One can never help a child much merely by pronouncing for him a word which he mutilates, because he will not hear precisely what he should hear in order to correct his fault. He will hear the word as a whole, and will miss the crucial part; and then when he pronounces it he will LANGUAGE TRAINING 163 fall back into his old liabit. The chief defect in the teaching of most parents is that they do not bring out the precise points which they want their children to learn. They do not isolate just the part or factor or element that needs correct- ing, and hold the learner ^s attention to it. The principle applies to the learning of words as well as to all the other things which children must learn. II Learning the Meanings of Words. — How does a child learn what the words used by the people around him denote ? Every time one sees a child accomplish this feat completely he cannot but marvel at it ; it is hardly less than a miracle that a child should learn the meanings of all the words commonly used by people in daily life. The most intelligent animal can learn the mean- ings of only a very few w^ords at best and these must be concrete, and relate to objects they see or actions they perform constantly. The highest animal cannot learn the meaning of a sentence of any degree of complexity. A normal child begins to attach some meaning to words at about the fifth month. By the time he has reached the eighth month he should know the meaning of ** mamma,'' *^papa,'' ^*baby," *' bottle,'' ** rattle," and a half-dozen other words that relate to objects with which he is in con- 164 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING stant contact. Of course, at this age he cannot grasp all that any word, no matter how simple, denotes to an adult, but he can and does learn what a word like *^ mamma" means in terms of the pleasure he gains from his mother. The mean- ings that he ascribes to words at the outset all relate very definitely and specifically to his most impressive experiences. If his brother always teases him or slaps him, then the word *^ brother" will mean a disagreeable, pain-giving object and nothing more. If his father always tosses him in the air when he is with him then ^^papa" to an eight-months-old child will mean simply an object that will toss him and so give him pleas- ure. It is the same with every word he learns for many months. He will develop no meaning at all for words that denote objects or actions or qualities that do not have immediate bearing upon his comfort or discomfort. It is inconceiv- able, for instance, that a child eight-months or even eighteen-months old should understand the meaning of ^^ goodness." He may, if he is taught properly, begin to get a glimpse of the meaning of ^^good" as it relates to his action in very con- crete instances, as when he does not grab for food when he comes to the table. He may also begin to associate the word with his bread and milk or some other article of food; but at best he can gain only a glimpse of the meaning. It will be many years before he can be said really LANGUAGE TRAINING 165 to understand the full meaning of *'good" and especially of ** goodness.'* Learning the Meanings of Words of Supreme Importance. — It should be pointed out here that the most important task for the child in his in- tellectual development is to acquire accurately the meanings of the words and sentences in the oral and written form used by the people among whom he lives. No one can develop mentally much farther than he can learn the meanings of words and sentences. To illustrate: a child who could not learn more than fifty words by the time he is three years of age would be arrested in his mental development. It would be evidence that his brain was developing too slowly or that there was an impediment which prevented his connect- ing words with the objects or actions or qualities which they denote. Again, if a child could not learn the meanings of words which do not denote specific concrete ob- jects, actions or qualities, as say *^ gentle *' or ^^ugly*' or *^ helpful" he could not attain a high degree of mental development. In order to learn words which are not directly connected with con- crete things it is required that the individual should be able to construct generalizations of his experiences and think in terms of these general- izations. A large part of the thinking of an intelligent adult is carried on in terms of general- izations of his concrete experiences. To con- 166 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING struct these generalizations requires a liigli type of intellectual activity. No animal, even the most intelligent, can do it. An idiot cannot do it. Morons — children who never go beyond the eighth or ninth year in intelligence — cannot form gen- eralizations except those of a very low degree of complexity. They cannot use words like ^^ help- ful,'' ^* goodness" or ''compassion" intelligently; and though they should live to be a hundred years old physically they could never make such gener- alizations or think in terms of them. The reader should bear in mind that most of the experiences of our ancestors in solving the problems of life are recorded in language; those for which they could find no words or sentences have not been perserved. As words have come down through the generations their meanings as well as their forms have changed according as the experiences of people have shown that modi- fications were desirable. The word ''virtue" does not have precisely the meaning to-day that it had when it was coined, but it has some of the meaning which those who first used it ascribed to it, but its meaning has been much extended and modified as it has been used by succeeding gener- ations; and a child of to-day who can master a large vocabulary in all its detailed meanings will have a great advantage over the child who can master only a limited vocabulary. For this rea- son it is of supreme importance that parents LANGUAGE TRAINING 167 should do every reasonable thing to help their children to learn the meanings of words ac- curately as fast as possible. Helping the Child to Learn Meanings. — How can the child be helped to learn meanings ! There is a simple psychological law upon which all lan- guage learning depends; when two things are in an individual's mind at the same time they tend to become associated; and if the association is repeated they become definitely connected to- gether so that when one of them comes into the mind the other will appear automatically. The child must leam all his words according to this principle. In learning what *^ bottle'' means, for instance, he must hear the word when he is look- ing at the object and feeling it and securing his food from it. The mother will pronounce the word when the child is attending to the bottle or eager to get it. She will not say — **Here is the bottle," or **Do you want your bottle?" She will simply say ^'bottle." If she speaks the sentence it will as a whole come to denote the object ^^ bottle," and later the child will experience difficulty be- cause he will continue to regard ^^Do you want your bottle!" as a single word. The same prin- ciple holds in his learning the meaning of all words denoting concrete objects or actions or qualities. Words Must he Used, Not Simply Heard. — The child cannot learn the meanings of words much 168 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING if any more rapidly than he can use the words accurately. It is a law of the mind that under- standing and use go together. Nature never in- tended that a child should lie in his cradle and learn the world. He learns it only as he deals with it. In the same way, he will learn words just in the measure that he can use them. Nature has made a very direct connection between hear- ing a word and speaking it. If the center in the brain which controls speech should be destroyed one could not hear words distinctly. Hearing with understanding is in part vocalization, or some form of expression. If there is no expres- sion there will at best be only very hazy under- standing. The parent should keep this principle constantly in mind in all teaching, and especially in the teaching of words. The child must speak the words when he hears them, in direct con- nection with the things which they denote. Young Children Get Their Cues from Facial Expression. — Parents often think their children understand words very much more fully than they can speak them. A mother recently said that her three-months-old child understood such sentences as '^Here comes papa'^ and ^^Do you want to go outdoors^* and ^^ Would you like to have your bottle T* It is veiy unlikely that a three-or four-or five-or six-months-old child could grasp the meaning of sentences like those given; but the mother declared that her three-months- LANGUAGE TRAINING ISO old child showed in his responses that he knew what the sentences meant. It is more probable that he understood the meaning of her facial expression, her gesture, and her intonation rather than the sentences she used. Whenever a mother says ^' Would you like to go out-doors T' she looks in the direction of out-doors, she prob- ably has the child ^s coat in her hand, and the expression of her countenance indicates some pleasurable experience for the child; and taking all these things together he responds enthusias- tically, showing that he wants something from the mother. He can tell from the mother's facial expression alone that she has some agree- able plan in her mind for him, and he wants her to go through with it. That's as far as his under- standing goes. He would respond in the same way if she should say with exactly the same facial expression, intonation, and other expres- sional accompaniments, ** Would you like to have a good thrashing r' The special words used would have no meaning for the child; he would rely upon the expressional accompaniments of the words. Animals do this very largely. A dog takes his cue from the expression of his master's countenance or his intonation or gesture when he does not understand the meaning of a single word used by the master. This is much the same prin- ciple as that used by deaf persons in watching the lip movement and the expression of a speaker. 170 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING III Young Children Use Single-Word Sentences. — Parents who wish to teach their children lan- guage often speak to them in as complex sen- tences as they nse in speaking to adnlts. It is a w^onder that a child learns at all when he is sub- jected to such treatment. The only thing that saves him is that accidentally he discovers that certain words are connected with particular ob- jects. But some one may ask, ^* Since a child must learn sentences sooner or later, would it not be best for him to hear sentences at the outset?" No, it would not. He cannot understand sen- tences any more rapidly than he acquires power to use them, and he never employs sentences until after he has nsed single words for some time. During the first year-and-a-half or so he thinks of objects, actions and qualities as a whole and single words are adequate to express the content of his thinking. He does not say, when his pet dog comes running toward him, **Here comes doggy." He says simply, ^^ Doggy." He does not say, ' ' I wish I had my bottle ; " he says, ** Bottle." And so with all his linguistic expres- sion during most of the first two years. Just as he gains his cues respecting the atti- tude and intentions of the people around him from their facial expression, intonation, gesture, etc., rather than from the words they use, so he LANGUAGE TRAINING 171 conveys his attitude and intentions to others prin- cipally by gesture, intonation, facial expression and bodily movements. An experienced mother can easily tell whether her six-months-old child wants to have her take him in her arms, even though he cannot utter a sound which has the slightest resemblance to the sentence, ''Please take me up.'' In the same way the mother knows when he is hungry or afraid, or when he wants to play, and the like, from his physical expression and not from his linguistic expression. Nature has wisely arranged it so that the child is an adept in gesture, intonation and facial expression. By means of these expressional accompaniments he can make the people around him understand how he feels and what he wishes when he could not do so by the use of language alone. Hoiv Sentences Are Built Up. — It should be stressed that the child's sentences are at the out- set always single words. Sometimes parents try to induce their nine- or ten-months-old children to use complete sentences. This is absurd and it may be injurious. It is certain that the child of this age will not and cannot use complete sen- tences and it will only irritate him and confuse him to urge him to do so. By the time he is two-years-old he will use a few two-word sen- tences as, ''Doggy jumps." If the dog jumps over the chair the child will designate the act by gesture. He may simply use the one word 172 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING ** doggy." If he has completed his second year and he persists in the use of his single-word sen- tences, amplifying them by physical expression, the parent can help him to move forward in the mastery of the sentence by adding action words, teaching them exactly as object words should be taught. Thus, the mother will have the dog jump over the chair and use *^ jumps" when the child has the action in his mind. Then she will speak the sentence *^ Doggy jumps;" and with the nor- mal child it will not be long before he will inte- grate the word * ^ jumps ' * with the word ^ ^ doggy, * ^ and use the sentence ** doggy jumps." If he is arrested in his development he will make this integration very slowly. If he should not grow beyond the eighteenth month in his intelligence he may never use a sentence of even such sim- plicity as *^ Doggy jumps," because his mind will not be so constituted that it can combine into a unity an object and its acts or qualities. The typical parent forgets that the whole busi- ness of mastering a language is before the child, and it is a tremendous task for him to connect two words together properly in a sentence. His task should not be made all the more difficult by the parent when he is in the one- or two-word sentence stage. Of course, parents may use com- plex sentences in their conversation with one another, but this will not be confusing to the child when he is not trying to learn. Confusion LANGUAGE TRAINING 173 arises only when Ms attention is turned to the use of language, and then the parent employs com- plex sentences in speaking to him and urges him to repeat these sentences. The Use of Gesture^ etc., Should he Con- tinued. — The free use of gesture and intonation should be continued throughout the period of childhood and youth. There is evidently a very close connection between facility in the use of language and facility in gesture, intonation, and facial expression. A child who does not use any of the latter expressional aids will develop facil- ity in language very slowly. Sometimes when children begin school they become self-conscious and unduly restrained in the employment of ges- ture, facial expression and intonation, and they are always handicapped in the acquisition of language. Sometimes primary schools repress expressional aids and when this is the case young pupils will be hindered in the development of language facility. On the other hand, a child who continues to rely principally upon gesture, facial expression, and intonation will be handi- capped in the learning of language. Unless he feels the need of language for the expression of his experiences he will not acquire it. It would not be wise, then, for the parent to permit a three- or four-year-old child to depend almost wholly in his expression upon gesture, intonation, and facial expression. He should be urged to express 174 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING himself in language in order to secure what he desires. Children Can Learn to Speak Only hy Speak- ing. — One often sees parents who hinder their children in learning language because they will not let them work through their difficulties. When a young child attempts to say, *^May I go out to playf the mother may take the words out of his mouth and say them for him, so that all he is required to do is to nod his head, or say **yes." Some parents cannot bear to hear their children struggling to express themselves, nor are they patient enough to let them straighten out sen- tences when they try to use them. It is deadly in the development of language facility for parents to do the talking for their children, or express impatience when the children hesitate and stumble in the use of sentences. It is certain that most children cannot learn to use sentences with- out a good deal of strain and stress. They will get tangled up whenever they attempt to use a new sentence or one more complicated than they have been using. What the parent should do is at the right moment to suggest how the sentence can be straightened out, but the child should never be permitted to abandon it without using it prop- erly. He cannot learn to speak except by speak- ing, and this is peculiarly true in respect to the use of sentences. One j5nds pupils in schools and even in colleges who can hardly use a complex LANGUAGE TRAINING 175 sentence. They avoid difficulties, abridging sen- tences and adopting shortcuts whenever possible. One reason they lack ease and facility in the use of language suited to their needs is because in their earlier years sentences were taken out of their mouths when they were trying to construct them IV If Is an Exceedingly Difficult Task to Master Languages. — Any one will appreciate the prob- lems which the child must solve in mastering our language if he will observe him struggling even to pronounce a single word, let alone construct an entire sentence. Take a child of eighteen months trying to use a word like ** beef-steak'' for in- stance. In order to accomplish the task he must be able to recall the word when he sees the ob- ject, or if he does not see the object before him he must be able to image it in fancy and then ta recall the word denoting it, and finally to execute the vocal movements required to speak it. Now, this is a very complicated process, though it may seem simple to one who has completely mastered it. If a dog should do a thing like this we would marvel at it and justly so, but we take it as a matter of course that a child should be able to do it. It is not surprising that he has to struggle with it until he has accomplished it several hun- dred times. "V^^ile he is learning he may have 176 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING to cease his other activities when he tries to make the connection between the object, the word and its vocal expression. A child will often stop in his tracks when he is endeavoring to recall the name of an object or to pronounce it if he has a dim idea of it. Frequently he will not succeed in his efforts to give the name of an object even though at other times he may be able to do it. This means that the paths of connection in the brain between an object and the word that de- notes it are not well enough established so they can always be followed. Under certain conditions even an adult cannot think of words or sentences to express his ideas. Some readers of these lines may have the experi- ence that when they are much fatigued they can- not find words to express themselves and they get tangled up in their sentences. Also, when they are overtaxed they cannot interpret what they read so that words and sentences may ap- pear blank to them. In such cases the connec- tions between words or sentences and ideas have become temporarily disturbed. If a person should be nervously prostrated and remain in that con- dition he might permanently lose his ability to use appropriate words and sentences for the ex- pression of ideas. At the onset of old age when the vitality of the brain begins to decline, words and sentences may be forgotten and it may be impossible to interpret langiiage seen or heard. LANGUAGE TRAINING 177 In the end, the individual may be brought back to the condition of infancy in which there is no con- nection between ideas and the words and sen- tences which denote them. Whiskey and other alcoholic drinks will dis- turb the connections between ideas and words and sentences so that when a man is drunk he cannot express himself as readily or as accu- rately as when he is sober. Other drugs that act directly upon the nervous system disturb the connections that have been built up through years of association of ideas and language. The Child Meets His Chief Difficulties in Gram- matical Relations. — The difficulties of construct- ing sentences are greatly increased by the lack of uniformity in the methods of construction. There are almost as many exceptions to any rule of grammatical relation in English as there are. instances conforming to the rule. Young chil- dren use expressions like the following: I seed. I runned. I are. I is. My feels bad. My wants this. Here comes the boys. Three oxes. Four mouses. Two knifes. I have a lot of chicken poxes. Us is going out-doors. I have been teached. I speaked to him. I deaded him (killed a fly). I failed down stairs. I gaved it to him. I sided it. I growed last night. Neither I nor Jim ivere there. Look at the lady parasolling (waving her parasol in the air). I wish I could go horsehacking. My apple is gooder than yours. 178 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING That dog is awfuller than the other one. Me fall down stairs — no. I drinked ont of jar — yes. And so on ad libitum. In all these cases the child follows some plan he has followed generally in his speech. He is accustomed to use forms like **I spanked/' *'I laughed/' ^^1 cried/' etc., and then he constructs all his verbs on this plan, as *^I runned/' ^^1 seed/' '^1 huyed/' etc. He is confused by the variety of pronouns, 7, my, me, tve, our, us^ and so on. In a logically constructed language there would not be so many forms. There would be one form in the singular and one in the plural for each of the persons. The child endeavors to follow some such a plan in his speech, but in English there are so many irregularities that no logical plan can be fol- lowed. The more logical-minded a child is the harder time he may have with the irregularities of English. This is true not only in respect to grammar but it is equally true in respect to pro- nunciation and spelling. The child learns, for instance, that t-h-o-u-g-h is pronounced tho. Then when he comes to t-Ji-r-o-u-g-h he tries to make it thro, and s-l-o-u-g-h, slo, r-o-u-g-h, ro, and so on. There are innumerable difficulties of this sort in English, which is one reason why a child makes so many blunders in grammar, in pronunciation, and in spelling. There is no way the child can correct most of his grammatical errors except by imitating cor- LANGUAGE TRAINING 179 rect forms which he hears used around him. He cannot be taught in grammatical terms why he should say ^'I ran'' instead of ^^I runned/' When he uses the wrong form the parent must simply give him the right form without comment, or merely say, ^^ People speak in this way," and have him repeat it. When he reaches the sixth or seventh grade in school he will learn why one form should be used instead of another, but it will only confuse him to talk about reasons when he is three or four or five years of age. The same is true of his pronunciation and his spelling. Certainly every parent should appreciate the necessity of being patient with the child in cor- recting his linguistic errors. It should also be appreciated that there is no way by which the child can learn correct forms except by ceaseless repetition of them until they become automatic. So far as possible, wrong forms should not be used because if they become established it will be difficult to eliminate them. One sees adults who have formed bad habits of speech in respect to grammar and pronunciation, and though they may know better they gannot do any better. Their old habits persist in the face of knowledge to the contrary. It cannot be too much emphasized that pronunciation and grammatical usage are very largely matters of imitation. They cannot be learned by rule, in the early years at any rate. So the parent must strive to have the child hear 180 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING correct models. If lie does, he need not worry- about the child ^s learning to speak correctly. Individual Differences in Learning Language. — Finally, it should be mentioned that children differ in the ease and facility with which they learn language in all its aspects. Speaking gen- erally, the child who masters language most rapidly is the most intelligent; the child who progresses most slowly in language is the least intelligent. Occasionally one sees exceptions to this rule, for there are individuals who are never proficient in language but they are excellent in mathematical or scientific lines. In colleges and universities one sees students who have great trouble in their classes in English or in foreign language, but who are superior in physics, mathe- matics, chemistry or any science. This is not the rule, by any means, but cases are occasionally found. A concrete instance vfill illustrate the principle. Leo is fourteen years of age. He is backward in some of his school work, especially in gram- mar, spelling, history, and composition. He is always deficient in learning rules in any study. He is able to solve actual problems in arithmetic very well; but he fails right along in learning the rules so that he can recite them according to I LANGUAGE TRAINING 181 the book. He lias great difficulty in learning words, though he can learn things and can deal with them effectively. Modern studies in human nature have given us principles which help to explain this type. There are distinct parts of the brain which are concerned with retaining impressions of words. There are four of these *^ areas" or *' centers." One area is concerned with retaining words that are seen.^ If a person should receive an injury in this part of the brain, he would lose the power to read, though his eyes might be in perfect condition; he might hear words when spoken to him, and he might be able to write them. Another area is concerned with retaining words which are heard. If a disease or accident should destroy this area, one would be mentally deaf, even though the ear might be in a sound condition. Again, there is a particular area that has to do with words that are written. Some people have the disease known as ^^ agraphia," inability to write words, though they may have perfect control of their hands and fingers in other ways, and they may be able to read and to understand words that they hear. Finally, there is an area which is concerned with speech. When this area is destroyed, a person has ** aphasia," though the vocal apparatus may be unimpaired. Now, some individuals appear to be so consti- tuted that these language areas develop less rap- 182 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING idly and completely than is the case with other individuals. Leo acquired speech very slowly. He could not speak plainly when he was five years of age. He is left-handed, and it appears to be the rule that left-handed persons acquire language, at least speech, more slowly than right-handed individuals. The brain area controlling speech adjoins the area controlling the right hand, and when the right hand is used especially, it seems to exert a beneficial influence upon the speech area. Leo cannot pronounce words as accurately and readily as his brother. And what is more serious, he has difficulty in remembering them once he has learned them. He cannot find words readily to describe his experiences. When he is discussing a lively subject with a group of boys, Leo^s voice will be heard less frequently than the others, simply because the talk moves too swiftly for him. You can hear him often call out to the group: ^'Listen, listen,'' so that he can have a chance to get started, whereas his younger brother, who may be in the group, can strike in the instant there is an opening. The latter always has his words at his tongue's end, while Leo has to hunt around in his consciousness for his words, and it takes him longer to construct a sentence than it does most of his associates. Leo will not be distinguished in any situation in which the ready and accurate use of words LANGUAGE TRAINING 183 is the essential thing. To illustrate : He may go with his father on a trip to a near-by city. When he comes back, he tells the family what he has done and what he has observed. But he has to appeal to his father frequently for the terms to describe new objects and experiences. He will frequently say, ^^that thing that we saw, you remember," or **that place over there we visited," or ^^that store, I forgot the name, in which we made pur- chases," and so on. His younger brother, on the other hand, does not employ these general, indefinite terms. He uses the exact terms neces- sary to name the objects he has observed, the stores he has visited, and the happenings that have occurred. One can see why Leo has such a hard time in much of the work of the school, and why his younger brother is pushing ahead of him. Both the boys have this year taken up the study of a foreign language, — French. The younger one learns his lessons in a few minutes, and he seems to enjoy this subject. He fre- quently uses French in sentences around the house. The older boy spends twice as much time over his lessons as the younger one, and even then he does not master them thorosughly. He rarely uses a French phrase outside of the classroom. He is timid about attempting anything in French. He lacks self-confidence. He also lacks interest in trying to master and espe- 184 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING cially to use the new language. The thing does not appeal to him, partly because he knows he can never become proficient in it. But while Leo is behind his brother in language, he is ahead of him in music. He can play one musical instrument very well, and he never has to be urged to apply himself to his practice. Playing an instrument gives him some- thing to dOy and he is the doing type, while his brother is the learning type. Unless Leo can devote himself largely to concrete studies involv- ing doing of some kind he will never reach col- lege. If he should be required to continue his French throughout the high school and in addi- tion take up Latin and history and literature he would be very apt to fail. On the other hand, if he should elect manual arts, science, especially if it should be outdoor science, — agriculture or engineering, — ^he would probably make good, espe- cially if his teachers would allow him to phrase principles and rules in his own way. But if they should compel him to recite the rules exactly as they are given in his books, he would have trouble all the way through. It should be noted that Leo is not deficient in memory of every kind. He can remember better than most boys of his age people whom he has met, or any machinery he has handled, or any game he has ever played. His mother can send him into the city to do errands and he will LANGUAGE TRAINING 185 not forget a single detail. His parents say he never forgets to pick up his belongings in his room when he is leaving it. He never forgets to change his clothes on wash-day and deliver the soiled garments to the laundress. His younger brother, however, has an ^^ atrocious memory'* for these things, according to his mother. He leaves every article of clothing where it happens to drop in his room. His mother always has to remind him to change his clothes on wash-day. Leo has a much better memory than his brother for every-day matters, though it is the other way 'round for the things of the schoolroom. CHAPTEE VI FIRST STEPS IN TRAINING DISPOSITION When Temperament Is Formed. — By the time a child completes his third year he has learned his cues relating to the attitudes he should assume toward people about him. He has made up his mind, such mind as he has, whether he will rule those about him or whether he must conform to regulations made by others, — his parents, his brothers and sisters, and his neigh- bors. Of course, he has not reflected on the matter of domination or obedience; he is not aware that he is either seeking to bend people to his wishes or that he is adapting himself to their programs. Nevertheless he has established social attitudes by his third birthday which are likely to last him without fundamental modification throughout childhood and often into youth, and possibly even until the end of his days. If his early habits are eradicated after his third birth- day it will be only with much strain and stress and discomfort for himself and for those who train him. 186 TRAINING DISPOSITION 187 Nervous Stability. — The chief thing a baby- should acquire and maintain during his first three years is nervous stability. An erratic disposition is due more to nervous overstrain and irregu- larity than to any other one factor. Take a child who during the first three years is tossed around by Tom, Dick, and Harry ; who is treated as a toy by his parents, his brothers and sisters, and the neighbors; who is constantly stimulated through eye, ear, and skin, and what are the chances that he will have an amiable disposition throughout the period of childhood and youth? The chances are slight. With a hundred children chosen at random who are treated in the manner described, the probabilities are that from seventy- five to eighty-five of them will be irritable, will be subject to fits of intense anger, will not sleep sweetly and soundly, will be finicky about food, and will move heaven and earth to gain their own way. There is apt to be too much excitement for children in modern town and city life anyway, even when parents try to protect them from undue stimulation. There is so much noise and movement and rush ever^^vhere that it is not easy to keep the young from being affected by it. The child's nervous system was not planned for such incessant bombardment as it often is subjected to through eye, ear and skin. Com- pared with us, our remote ancestors lived quietly 188 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING in the forest, or in the cave, or by the seashore. The child is to a greater or less extent reminis- cent of the earlier times and we should bring him by slow degrees into contact with the full tide of life in these days. The Manner of Holding an Infant. — The man- ner of holding an infant exerts some influence upon his nervous stability. A four-months-old child can often distinguish in the dark between the arms of his mother and the arms of a stranger. He is very sensitive to the position and feel of the supporting arms when he is being- carried about. It would be fortunate if every child could be held in a strong, calm, quiet man- ner. An excitable, nervous parent, or brother, or sister, or aunt, or uncle, or grandmother, or neigh- bor should not be permitted to hold a child. Some reader may ask, ^*Who will hold him then, since in some households there are no other sorts of persons!'' In such a case it would be best to leave the child in his cradle most of the time until he reaches the stage when he can begin to wiggle along the floor. It is, of course, too much to expect that nervous, high-strung, ill-poised persons will not take young children in their arms; but if they do hold them they can at least avoid dancing them up and down and throwing them hither and thither in order to amuse them or subdue them when they squall. It makes one sick at heart to TRAINING DISPOSITION 180 obser\^e excitable persons nervously shaking children in order to quiet them when they are restless. If some children were not well put together they would be jarred to pieces by fidgety care-takers. The principle upon which such persons proceed seems to be that if they can stir up a child's insides sufficiently they can distract his attention from the troubles that make him cry; but they forget that the time will come, and speedily, too, when these troubles will be augmented on account of the disturbances occasioned by violent bodily agitation. Why is it that caretakers so rarely try to discover the cause of a child's restlessness and peevishness, and then seek to remove the cause? It would be as sensible to give a person suffering from toothache an anesthetic so that he would not be conscious of the pain, and not try to remedy the cause of it as to agitate a crying child in order to subdue him. This does not mean that a discontented child should not be comforted by swinging in one's arms or in the cradle or by song. An infant who has become irritated can often regain his composure if he be gently held or rocked in strong arms. A quiet, sympathetic voice expressed in song will soothe a restless child. What is needed is quiet and not nervous, exciting, and stimulating treatment. Strangers Should Let Children Alone. — A wise parent will not permit strangers to pick up 190 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING a child when they come into the house. Strangers should let children alone. Ninety out of a hun- dred children are timid and suffer a nervous shock when strangers approach them and take them up. In time they will grow out of this native dread of strangers, but while they are in this period they must be protected. They must not even be talked to by strangers. Those who come into the house must talk to the parents and the older children and let the younger ones look on and listen or go their own way. In time a child will appreciate that he will suffer no harm if he fraternizes with strangers; but he will reach this stage most quickly and satisfactorily if he and not the stranger makes the advances. It should be an irrevocable law in every house- hold in which there is a very young child that visitors must not touch him unless the child solicits attention. Of course, the best arrange- ment would be for the infant to be in a room of his own when visitors are at the house ; but if he must be present with them, he must be ignored by them. The common failing of a parent in showing off a baby to all the visitors who come into the house is one good way to spoil his disposition, mainly through over-stimulating him and developing nervous irregularity and in- stability. Rhythm in Habits. — During the first three years, and longer for that matter, a child should TRAINING DISPOSITION 191 be regular in his habits. Nature has apparently designed that a child's mind and body should operate on a rhythmical program. He should have his food at regular hours, go to sleep at regular times, awaken at regular times, aed spend certain hours regularly in the open air and in play. If regularity be observed during the first three years the child will almost automatically observe this regularity in succeeding years unless the conditions in the household prevent it. A well-trained child of four or five will awaken at a certain hour every morning and he will follow the day's program without much protest. When a child's nervous system develops such regu- larity he is not likely to fly off the handle on slight pretext, though of course all young chil- dren are easily upset and go to extremes in their expression of resentment and anger. But regu- larity in habits will subdue these excesses while irregularity w^ill tend to accentuate and perpetu- ate them. The Treatment of Crying. — Lack of self-con- trol is manifested principally during the early years in immoderate crying. Nature equips the child with a crying apparatus which is set going on very slight provocation. If a mother is too sensitive to a child's crying and is too eager to help him when he squalls or to suppress him, she will be likely to spoil him. Some at least of a typical child's crying must be ignored. The 192 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING reader should not hasten to the conclusion that caretakers should be indifferent to all of a child's complaints; this is not the case. A practiced ear can tell whether a child is suffering pain when he is crying, whether he is afraid, or whether he is simply trying to coerce the people around him into serving him. If he is suffering pain or is afraid he must be relieved if possible. But if he is angry because those about him mil not toady to him, then he must be ignored. If it is time for him to take his nap and he pro- tests, his protestations must fall upon deaf ears. He will not long continue to resist or lament when he discovers that there is a certain invari- able order in the day's program which he cannot change by complaining. It has never yet been recorded that anyone has been able to prevent all crying by a normal child. Aristotle said long ago that even if we could prevent it we should not do so because the child's lungs are developed in part through the exercise they receive when he cries. Later writers on childhood have called attention to what appears to be a fact, — that a moderate amount of crying facilitates circulation and is of some advantage in physical development. These views are mentioned in passing in the hope that they may help a mother or other care- taker, who is inclined to be easily upset by a child's crying,to retain self-possession and a phil- TRAINING DISPOSITION 193 osopliic attitude when lie squalls ^\nthout any reason for it so far as can be observed. Neighbors Should Not Interfere. — Often neigh- bors make it difficult for a mother to train her child so that he will not attempt to bully her into gratifying his whims. Of course, they are not whims to him, but this is what they would amount to if they should be indulged always, be- cause they would develop habits which would keep him in hot water much of the time in later years. Neighbors do not like to hear children ciy. If a mother puts her child out on the porch in his carriage for his nap and he lets it be known that he would rather be wheeled or car- ried around, some of the neighbors are likely to make it plain to the mother that they would rather she should take him in the house or quiet him in some manner. In cases like this a mother must consider whether she would rather spoil her child and keep the regard of the neighbors or the other way around, provided the neighbors are unreasonable in their attitude toward the training of children. Usually a mother can make a distressed neighbor appreciate that it will not take long far a child to learn that when he is put out on the porch to take a nap he must go through with the business and i.t will not do the least bit of good for him to yell about it. He must be a very inconsiderate neighbor indeed who would not help a mother to train her child 194 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING in this manner. It can be represented to the neighbor that if he remains in the immediate vicinity he will have to live with the child in later years, and he had better stand a little cry- ing now than a lot of it together with other disagreeable traits later on. II Habits Cannot Be Broken Suddenly, — Suppose a child has been indulged during his first eighteen months and then the mother decides that he must be trained. She has always run to him when he cried and tossed him about to subdue him, but she reads this chapter and she makes up her mind that she will change her methods instantly and will let her child '^cry it out^^ hereafter. Sudden changes in methods of training never work out well. One cannot break a child's habits in an hour or a day. If a child has come to expect that when he is put in his carriage to take a nap he will be taken up and fussed with if he cries, then a mother must go slow in devel- oping a different sort of expectation in him. She will have to work out her new program very gradually. A child who has developed certain habits is likely to be injured if an attempt is made to break them at one stroke. The usual method of those who treat children in an ill-poised, nervous way in trying to subdue TRAINING DISPOSITION 195 them is to slap them. This is a simple and handy way of expressing one's irritation. But no better means than this could be devised to increase the' child's nervous instability and his irrascibility. Slapping is a nervous excitant and irritant. It may distract a child's attention momentarily and inhibit his yelling, but there will be a day of reckoning when the nervous shock produced by the slapping will lead to greater excesses either in crying or in some other form of irregularity or misdemeanor. If a child must be punished, some stronger and calmer and more impressive method should be found than slapping him. Gentle Measures in Training Disposition. — About iive hundred men and women represent- ing all sections of the country have recently given testimony regarding the extent to which force is being employed to-day in the training of the young in their respective localities. The results of this inquiry indicate clearly that physical punishment in every form is being abandoned. In some communities boards of education have established rules prohibiting teachers from using corporal punishment for any effence whatsoever. In other communities in which no such laws have been enacted, public opinion is nevertheless so strong against the use of physical force that it is rarely if ever employed. The testimony of one superintendent ,of schools in a city of about fifty thousand people 196 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING is similar in main features to that given by others. He says: ^'I have been in this city for twenty years. When I began my work here teachers used to punish pupils freely by whipping them or paddling the hands. Often they would cuff them or perhaps pull their ears. All that is past. There has not been a teacher in this city who has struck a child with a whip or a ferrule or with his hands for at least three years. I do not know what would happen if a teacher should whip a child now. The board of education has made no definite rule against it, but I think a teacher who would use corporal punishment on a child would be removed from her position." There are a number of towns and cities in the country in which whipping is still practiced, but even in these places the school people say there is not as much punishing as there w^as ten years ago. They predict that in a short time all cor- poral punishment will be abandoned, and children will be disciplined in some other way. Physical force persists in rural schools in some states more largely than it does in town and city schools. One state superintendent says that a considerable proportion of his teachers still whip children occasionally; but in these states young women are replacing men in the rural schools, and they tend to rely upon other means than force in the management of their pupils. TRAINING DISPOSITION 197' The Abolition of Corporal Punishment. — What is the effect upon the conduct of children of the abolition of corporal punishment! Opinions differ in respect to this matter. Some educa- tional men think pupils, boys especially, are not as well-behaved now as they were twenty years ago, and are not as respectful toward their teachers, or as industrious and earnest in their work. The view still prevails, among these men [that if the rod be spared in the schoolroom the pupils will be spoiled. But the majority of superintendents, prin- cipals, and teachers maintain rthat pupils conduct themselves better when corporal punishment is not practiced upon them than when they are whipped. One principal claims that when a pupil is whipped the whole school is likely to assume a rebellious attitude toward the teachers. He says he knows schools in which the boys par- ticularly have dared one another to see what pranks they could play on the teacher who punished them, and he thinks the use of force simply arouses the evil and combative impulses of pupils. Classical Writers Advise Against the Use of the Rod. — The classical writers on education have for the most part advised against the use^f physical coercion in the training of the young. John Locke, one of the wisest of the educational leaders of an earlier day, advised that the rod 198 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING be used upon children only when they were ob- stinate or disobedient; he would overlook most of their faults and shortcomings because, as he said, time would cure them. Rousseau said parents and teachers should not whip children for any cause whatsoever. He maintained that children should learn to do right by suffering the natural consequences of their misdeeds. Herbert Spencer held that whipping and all methods based on force are artificial and inef- fective. To Froebel whipping children was abhorrent, for he said it brutalized them and suppressed the divinity within them. Pestalozzi like Froebel advised gentleness in all discipline. Dr. Montessori says it is never necessary to coerce children; she claims that they will always do what is right if they be treated rationally. These are only a few of many great teachers who have urged parents and teachers to throw away the rod and guide children along the right path by gentle means. Physical Force Forbidden in France.— In France teachers are forbidden to use physical force in the discipline of pupils. In French schoolrooms one may see placards against the use of the rod. These placards state what a teacher may do to mischievous pupils. He may assign them additional tasks as a penalty, or deprive them of their intermissions, or detain them after school, or send them home, or report TRAINING DISPOSITION 190 them to the Prefect of the Seine, or may suspend them from school for a time. The writer has asked French schoolmasters whether they approve of the law prohibiting all corporal punishment, and without exception they have said: **We teach our children better now than we used to do. They look upon us as big brothers or fathers, and they do what we wish now better than they did when we used to whip them every day. We would not go back to the old regime when the rod was used so freely.'' It is undoubtedly true that in some schools conditions have greatly improved without the use of force, and in others it is equally true that the abandonment of force has led to evil results ; but the explanation is easy to find in each case. When force has been abandoned successfully, the teachers are able to gain the attention of pupils by other means. The teachers have more com- manding personalities than was the case for- merly. They win the good will and respect of pupils more easily. They teach studies in a more interesting way than they were taught two or three decades ago. It is true that the seductions of the world are constantly increasing; children are subjected to distractions which were unknown fifteen or twenty years ago ; the school is in com- petition with the street, the nickelodeon, the dance hall, and the vaudeville for the attention of pupils. But by ineans of more skillful methods 200 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING of teaching and making the life of the school more attractive than the life outside, teachers are competing successfully with these distrac- tions, and much better results are obtained with- out the evils attending the use of force as employed in an older day. In any community, however, in which all force is abandoned without improving methods of instruction and making the school an attractive place, there will probably be disorder sooner or later. This is the case in some communities which the writer has visited. Pupils do not do any serious work. They tantalize the teachers without intending to be mean. They think a good deal more about ^^ cutting up'' than they do about learning their lessons. When such a school is taught by a weak teacher there is apt to be little efficient work done. Even w^orse, pupils are likely to fall into bad habits of loaiing in the schoolroom or playing tricks on the teacher or on their fellows. Many of the pupils who fail in college have good native ability, but in the elementary and high school they got into the way of wasting their time and thinking it more clever to play tricks than to master their studies, and they cannot now overcome these habits. The first requisite in any community in which corporal punishment has declined or is prohibited is to secure a teacher who is a leader and who is a teacher-artist, l^orce will not be required \ TRAINING DISPOSITION 201 to-clay in most schoolrooms presided over by strong, capable, well-trained teachers, who are also natural leaders. This type of teacher is needed in American schools now much more than ten or fifteen years ago when the military plan of conducting a school was quite generally in operation. Ill Physical Force in the Home. — What may be .-said now about the use of physical force in train- 7^g children in the home! By way of furnishing a practical illustration of the wholesome effect which corporal punishment may sometimes pro- duce, the following testimony from a conscien- tious, painstaking mother may be given. ''I am glad of the opportunity to tell my own experience as a mother of two healthy, active, mischievous children. It was years be- fore our first baby came that my husband and I began planning and studying child life. Among other things we decided so to train our offspring that it would never have to be our painful duty to whip them. When our little girl came she ruled the house, being healthy and very active. She was petted and spoiled and at the age of three months she showed a good deal of temper. As she grew older she would scream and kick until she got what she w^anted. I was at a loss to know how to handle the situation. I realized 202 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING something must be done to impress on lier mind that she could not have her own way by scream- ing when she could not have what she wanted. We tried to amuse her and give her things to occupy her mind, but all in vain. One day guests were coming for dinner, and all was in readiness except washing and dressing the baby, who was playing on the floor. I picked her up and imme- diately she began to scream and kick. I tried coaxing her and petting her and even attempted to make play out of it; but baby had a will of her own and I could do nothing with her. Finally I decided I must put an end to her stubborn- ness. I talked sternly to her; she opened her eyes but yelled all the louder. Then I turned her over my knee and gently spanked her, hardly enough to hurt her. I finished dressing her and put her on the bed. Then she went through another spasm. I again turned her over my knee, but this time I spanked her hard, put her back on the bed and very sternly told her to stop crying. In a minute she was quiet and was very good for the rest of the day. **A-s she grew older we tried all kinds of ways to punish her, but even to-day nothing but a spanking has any effect on her. For a long time she had not been punished, but last week I learned she had run away from school, written her own excuses, signed her report cards, and so on. I took her up to my room, closed the door TRAINING DISPOSITION 203 and talked kindly to her, hoping to make her ashamed of her action; but she grew ugly, and I could not get any information from her. At last, in desperation, I said to her, ^I did not think I would ever have to spank you again; you are old enough to know how to behave,' and to my surprise, she answered, ^I'm not afraid of your spankings.' The emphasis on the word 'your' astounded me. 'Very well,' I said; 'we'll see.' I told her to go to bed and I would be up to see her in five minutes. For the first time I realized my punishments had never been severe enough, not having used any instrument but my hands. I searched the house for something besides the well-worn hairbrush, and all that could be found was the wooden top which had come on a grape basket. Splitting it to a three-inch width, easy to handle heavy enough in weight to give a good sting, I proceeded upstairs with misgivings, wondering if I was pursuing the best course. I found Betty only partly undressed, defiant, and taking her time. Immediately I took off the rest of her clothing except her shoes and stockings, laid her across the bed, and spanked her as I had never done before. Since then she has been a model child in every way. "My boy has an entirely different disposition. When we talk and reason with him for any wrong act he very quickly repents; and while w^ punish him it is seldom that we resort to 204 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING whipping. Not long since, however, he disobeyed his father and took a tool which liis father valued highly, and used it too roughly, breaking the handle. His father told him he could not go to a club which he was very fond of nor was he to be allowed to go on a hike with the Boy Scouts. We were puzzled to note the effect this punish- ment had on the boy, for it did not seem to trouble him in the least. He stayed home and seemed perfectly happy. In a couple of days we noticed he seemed to be in deep thought, and one night he could hardly wait for his father's return from business. When his father returned the boy informed him that staying home wasn't a punishment because there had been some boys going to both places that he did not like and he had intended to stay home anyway. He wound up by saying, *Dad, why don't you lick me like the other fellows get licked? When the fellows asked what you did when I started the kids laughing in school and I told them *Just lec- tured,' ^Gee!' they hollered and said that was sissy.' His father did as the boy requested and he now seems to take pride in the fact that he has been kicked' like the rest of the boys. The next day I heard him tell one of his playmates with a good deal of pride about the smarting sensations he got when 'Dad gave me a regular bare-back spanking.' He seems to have more respect for his father since, strange as it may TRAINING DISPOSITION 205 appear, and both father and son seem to have a mutual understanding. ''I do not favor whipping unless it is the last resort; or as I have found it in the case of my own girl, nothing else has such good effect. But parents must study each child. My little girl inherits this strain, for as a child my parents could not force obedience from me except with the help of the strap. ' ' IV The Danger of Too Much Repression and Punishment, — A mother and grandmother were accompanying a boy four years old and a girl six years old on the train from Minneapolis to Chi- cago. They were typical children in their desire to be incessantly active in a motor way. The mother and grandmother had brought nothing along to occupy the children so the latter under- took to find occupation for themselves. The trip lasted from seven o'clock in the morning until nearly ten at night. From the beginning to the end of the trip there was almost constant con- flict between the children and their mother and grandmother. The children wished to run up and down the aisle of the car, to ^^fooP' with the curtains on the windows, to crawl over the back of their own seat into the next one, to run to the door whenever the train stopped in order to 206 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING see what was happening, to wrestle with one another and laugh and shout at the top of their voices — and so on through a long list of *^ mis- chievous^' actions. The mother and grand- mother did not approve of anything the children wanted to do spontaneously. They were chiding them and threatening them all day long. Ruining a Child's Disposition. — As a sample of the mother's methods with results, the follow- ing may be mentioned. The boy had found the mother's purse and was opening it. The mother said: ^^Keep your hands off that purse." The boy continued turning it about and trying to open it. The mother said again: ^^If you don't let that alone and put it down I'll slap you." Still the boy kept on, and the mother exclaimed : *^ Don't you hear me? Put that purse down and behave yourself. How many times must I tell you to do a thing before you will do as you are told?" Finally she slapped him severely on his cheek, and said: ^^You deserve it and you'll get more if you do not mind when I speak to you. ' ' The boy put down the purse and sat sullenly in his seat for a minute or two. Then he began pushing the window curtain up and down. The mother commanded him to let the curtain alone and behave himself. She went through about the same program with the curtain that she did with the purse, and at last slapped the boy. As TRAINING DISPOSITION 207 before, lie sat down sullenly in his seat, but it was not long until he was on his feet trying to get in the aisle so that he could run up and down. The mother did not approve of this and she ordered him to sit down and not be a nuisance in the car. After continued commands which were ignored she finally grabbed him by the shoulder and thrust him into his seat and slapped him sharply twice. This treatment quelled him momentarily. Meanwhile the girl was active. She had got into the lunch-basket and was helping herself to the provisions. She received a slap on the cheek which smarted and made her cry. The grand- mother supported the mother in her methods. She could be heard to say: ^^You are the worst children I have ever seen. You'll never be on a train with us again,'' and so on ad nauseam. There w^ere a few brief intervals of peace dur- ing the day when the children were smarting from their slaps or were fatigued; but when the pain ceased they would get into action again and then the struggle with their elders would be re- sumed. Several times the girl cried hard when she had been slapped. And while she was weep- ing the mother or grandmother would chide her in a most irritating way, telling her that she was a nuisance and a mischief-maker and had all the faults that anyone of her size could possess. , A fellow passenger on the train, being unable 208 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING to endure the irritation any longer, finally asked the mother and grandmother why they did not give the children a little freedom to do what they wished since they were harming no one ; and this was the mother's response: **They have been making life miserable for us ever since they got on this train. They need somebody to keep them down. It does not help them or us any to have a stranger *butt in.' If they did not have a strong hand over them it would be impossible to live with them at all.'' ^^ Thorns in the Flesh/ ^ — The mother and grandmother were both worn and nervous. So far as could be observed they did not smile once during the entire trip. They were not heard to say a gentle or companionable word to their children. When the children would burst out in spontaneous laughter the response of the mother and grandmother was a scowl. It was evident that they looked upon the children as * thorns in the flesh." They found no pleasure in them. This was undoubtedly the reason why they were so irritated by the spontaneous activities of the children. As a consequence they were fatigued and neurotic. They probably never take any pleasure in their children. They regard every- thing they do as mischievous and annoying. These women think they have constantly to chide, suppress and punish the children in order to make them sit still and ^'behave" themselves. TRAINING Disposition 209 The children are already callous to the com- mands that are given them by the mother and grandmother. Nature makes a child callous to continual censure in order to protect himself. If those children were very sensitive to all that was said and done to them it would kill them. The only way they can survive is to be indiffer- ent. If the mother and grandmother continue their present methods of training it will not be long until the children mil openly defy them. They will have no respect for authority. They will develop a belligerent attitude because they are constantly picked on and they will give as good as they receive. No better way could be thought of to ruin a child's disposition and make him a lawless member of society. The Banger of Over-indulgence. — The follow- ing instance illustrates a method of spoiling a child's disposition which one sees practiced very frequently and which is contrasted to the method described above. A mother and her six-year-old boy were traveling on an overland train. To provide against a time of need, the mother had brought along a box of candy. For a half hour after the train started the child's attention was occupied with the novelty of the situation, but when his curiosity in the new sights and sounds 210 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING began to wane he remembered the box of candy. The mother gave him a liberal allowance, more than she said was good for him, but the child teased for it and the mother yielded under pres- sure. Finally she said to him: ^'Now you must not ask for another bit of candy until after your dinner.'' The boy became interested in some pictures in a magazine, but his interest soon flagged, and again he thought of the box of candy. He began teasing his mother for some of it. It was less than an hour since he had had a generous supply, but his appetite for candy was apparently un- bounded, and he declared that he ^* just must have some more." The mother said to him: **I told you you could not have any more till after your dinner. You have had too much now. It is not good for you. You will be sick if you eat so much of it;" and more of the same kind. But after every sentence the boy would say: **But I want some more candy." He continued his teasing in a whining and irritating voice. The mother threatened him with punishment if he did not behave himself, all of which the boy ignored, and kept on with his whining. Finally the mother relented and under compulsion gave the boy a few more pieces of the candy, assuring him at the same time that under no conditions could he have any more until after dinner. He was promised a whipping if he asked for any more. TRAINING DISPOSITION 211 In less than an hour the boy began again to bully his mother into giving him candy. The mother resisted just as she did the first time and the boy made use of the same whining, irri- tating methods with the same results. At least ^ve times during the day the mother gave the boy candy, though she promised him each time that he could not have any more. But it was apparent that he had found from previous ex- perience that if he kept at his teasing long enough he could get what he wanted. The Spoiled Child. — One can easily predict what sort of a disposition this child will have later on. He has already acquired indifference to commands. He has gained the notion that if he persists in his whining he can secure anything he wishes. He has not learned that when a promise is made to him, it will be observed. In- stinctively all children resist authority at first, but a well-trained child discovers sooner or later that when a parent or anyone in authority makes a statement it is final, and teasing will not change it. And when a command is given it must be observed. Every normal child soon learns that if he pounds his finger with a ham- mer he will be hurt, and he will not keep pound- ing his finger.. He learns, too, that if he falls down stairs he will suffer, and he does not argue the matter with the stairs nor with the hammer; he simply accepts the situation and governs him- 212 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING self accordingly. So during the first two or three years of his life he learns that there are several hundred acts he cannot perform without getting hurt, and it does not take him a great while to avoid performing those acts. But in his relations to the people about him he often finds that by teasing and argument and whining he can secure what he wishes and do what he wants to do without suffering any ill- consequences. If he should discover that by teas- ing he could put his finger in the flame of a candle and not get hurt, he would tease to be permitted to do so, just as he teases to get candy ; but when he sees that teasing is of no account he mil abandon it. In the same way a well-brought-up child learns that teasing will not bring him any- thing from his parents or teachers, and he does not practice it. Anyone could tell that the boy on the train had not been well-brought-up. The mother had relented in the past and the child knew she would relent in the present if he persisted in his bully- ing. She held out long enough to make it un- pleasant for herself and the boy and everyone around her, and then she yielded. Every time she yields it will be the more difficult to teach her boy proper regard for authority. He does not go to bed at night as early as his mother wishes him to do ; he will not let any object in the house alone if he wishes to ^^fool'^ with if; and so on through TRAINING DISPOSITION 213 a long list of irregularities, all of whicli could have been avoided if he had from the outset learned that when a statement is made or a com- mand given it will do no good for him to try to avoid it or change it by teasing or whining. Ruining Disposition by Too Much Attention. — Children are frequently spoiled by giving them too much attention, as the following case illus- trates. Frances is three years old, very pretty and winsome. There are in the family two older sisters and a brother, besides the father and mother and an aunt. All the members of the family have been much interested in the baby since her birth and they have given her a good deal of attention. They are a social family and many friends call upon them and they go fre- quently to visit their friends. Whoever comes to the house must say something to Frances and show how much they think of her by talking to her, taking her in their arms, offering to do this or that for her, and so on. The members of the family like to have people notice her because she in such an attractive ^^ little thing. ^^ But she is causing some apprehension now because when- ever anyone speaks to her she says, *^No, no,^' in a petulant voice. Ask her any question or make any advances toward her and her one re- sponse will be ^^No, no." The parents think she is developing a bad habit and should have some training to get her out of it. 214 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING Oue way to prevent Frances from forming an annoying habit and acquiring an irritable dis- position would be for the members of her family and all others to keep hands off more than they now do. She should be taken only very rarely to neighbors and friends for visits. When friends come to the house she should be kept out of sight for the most part, — in her sand-pile or playing with her blocks or dolls alone. The brother and sisters should leave her to her own devices more than they do. She must grow from within quietly. It will take some time for the family to learn that they should not make a play-thing of Frances. They have not done this purposely, of course; they think they have been doing the right thing by Frances in showing her off and making her the center of attention. There are a great many children like Frances in American families who cause their parents trouble because of their irritability and lack of appreciation of what is done for them. They would be more appreciative if they received less attention than they do receive, and if they were left to themselves much of the time without inter- ference, even by members of the- family and cer- tainly by friends and neighbors. CHAPTER VII THE FIRST TOYS AND PLAYTHINGS Primary Mental Hungers. — One cannot under- stand the meaning or value of toys unless he appreciates that all normal children are born with profound mental as well as physical hungers. A child who did not crave mental experience would be feeble-minded. If he should lack any of the primary mental hungers he would be men- tally defective in these respects. In idiots physi- cal hungers are dominant throughout life, and this is one reason why they do not develop men- tally. These hungers are not all felt at the same time. Some appear in infancy, while others are not manifested until the teens. Still others do not appear until the approach of full maturity. Psychologists speak of nascent or growing periods in human life, by which they mean that the various mental traits, interests, and abilities make their appearance and become dominant at different stages of development. Most persons regard toys as suitable merely for a child's occupation and entertainment. But 215 216 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING while they should serve this purpose, they should at the same time meet a more important need. Every toy should minister in some degree to one or more of the primary mental hungers. A fortunate child would, in the course of his development, have toys which would gratify each hunger when it was at its height. It is too much to expect that the majority of children will be so situated that they can have just the toys and all the toys which will be best adapted to their needs at each stage of infancy, childhood and youth. But it should be possible in every home, however humble, to provide a few toys with which the children may exercise mental and muscular functions according to their needs. It is not a question primarily of expense, for the reason that the most valuable toys are not costly. A father who is handy with a few tools and a mother who can use a needle and scissors deftly can easily make most of the toys which a baby will require in order to be happily and profitably occupied during his waking hours. The elaborately con- structed toys which leave little or nothing for the baby himself to do are not best adapted either to promote his mental development or to gratify his interests. What are the primary hungers that should determine the baby's toys! First of all come the touch and muscular hungers. Nature designs that every normal child after about the fourth FIRST TOYS AND PLAYTHINGS 217 month should handle everything he can get hold of. And Nature says to him: **Do not be satis- fied simply with touching and manipulating ob- jects with your hands. Put everything you can manage into your mouth.'' The Mouth Is the Goal of All Activities in the Early Months. — During the first year, the mouth is the goal of every object the child can lay his hands on. After the first year the hands play an increasingly important part in touching and exploring objects ; but one rarely sees a five- months-old child feeling of things with his fin- gers. His hands are simply carriers with which to convey objects to his mouth. During the early months the sense of touch is apparently keener in the lips and tongue than it is in the fingers ; and the muscular, or as the psychologists say, the kinaesthetic, sense is apparently more dependable in the jaws than in the hands and arms. And these facts greatly complicate the problem of choosing suitable toys for the baby. The mother may be assured that anything the baby can manipulate will go to his mouth. For this reason he cannot be allowed to use toys that will easily collect dirt or that are covered with paint or dye that will come off when moistened by the saliva. One often sees a baby playing with a ball of colored yarn. The dye runs and he gets some of the threads in his mouth, and he makes a bad mess of the whole thin^-. Sometimes a mother 218 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING covers the baby's rattle with soft, colored yarn so that he will not '4iurt himself' with it. This is a mistake. Even if the baby bumps his nose or his forehead with the uncovered rattle and howls a little, he might better bear these ills than to suffer greater ones such as those that follow from sucking dyes tuffs. The toys used during the first eighteen months should be of material which can be thoroughly cleansed frequently, preferably by boiling. Some of a baby's troubles along the alimentary tract are due to the swallowing of germs that collect on his playthings. If a baby must play with his toys on the floor, it will save him some digestive trouble if a clean sheet is spread over the rugs or carpet or bare floor. Without these precau- tions, his toys, moist with saliva, will collect the dirt in his vicinity and eventually this dirt will find lodgment in his digestive system. Happily, not all the germs that are collected and swallowed in this way create trouble, but some of them are likely to do so. The most eminent students of germ diseases, such as Pasteur and Metchnikoff, maintain that all dirt, wherever found, contains harmful germs and ought never to be swallowed. When one sees babies playing with their toys on dirty rugs or bare floor, he wonders how any of them ever survive the experience. Of course, a considerable proportion of babies do not live out their first year. We could reduce this propor- FIRST TOYS AND PLAYTHINGS 219 tion if we kept the baby's playthings clean in a hygienic sense — that is, free from germs. Mention has been made of touch and muscular hunger. There are other hungers that are mani- fested as early as the fifth or sixth month and that last until the teens, at any rate. There is the hunger for sounds, the hunger to be the cause of happenings, and the hunger to do what those about one are doing, that is, imitation. Then there is the passion to throw, to climb, to tear, to pound, to cut, to slide, and so on. These are the great hungers or passions, all of which ap- pear during the first three years, which parents should strive to gratify by appropriate toys and playthings. II The First Toy — the Rattle, — As far back as we have any record of babies, their first toy has usually been the rattle, and it will undoubtedly continue to be the first toy so long as babies are in fashion. The baby's interest in the rattle lies partly in the agreeable sounds he can produce with it, but there is an additional interest in that by shaking it he can gratify his hunger for mus- cular activity. One may note in observing a baby with a rattle that his whole muscular apparatus ---arms, legs, body muscles, vocal muscles — is brought into action when he is playing with it. The passion for the rattle is at its height between 220 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING the third and the eighth or ninth month; there- after a normal child will be more interested in objects which have more marked and diversified characteristics, and which he can put to a greater variety of uses than he can the rattle. If one will observe the child playing with the rattle, he will note that it is not an objective or intellectual activity to any extent. He gives himself up com- pletely to the simple experience of shaking the rattle. He does not investigate it to see of what it is made or what can be done with it except to shake it and get noise from it. But an eight- or nine-months-old child is normally intensely inter- ested in the objects about him and he manipulates them unceasingly, and the rattle will no longer attract him more strongly than other objects. The Drum and Bells. — But for many months and even for years the baby w^ill be interested in toys or playthings from which he can get sounds of varying quality and intensity. From time immemorial children have been interested in the drum, partly for the sound it yields and partly because it indulges the passion to pound. Any child would be unfortunate who could not have a drum or something corresponding to it as early as the third year. There is one objection to this toy since in modern life, when we are all shut up in houses, it may be irritating to the nerves of adults, and it may be over-stimulating to the baby himself. But the drum can be muffled. The HOME INSTRUCTION 221 baby will gain the muscular pleasure of beating it and he will be satisfied with the subdued sound unless he has become accustomed to the blare of the unmuffled drum. In addition to the drum as a sound-making toy, a three-year-old child should have a string of tuned bells upon which he can run an octave at least. If these are put in a living-room where there are adults and older children, they will probably be disturbing, but if the baby has a room to himself, he will gain vast pleasure out of the bells and they will be of some ' educative value to him besides, in helping him to take the first steps in discriminating pitch and tone. Of course, a three-year-old will be more inter- ested in beating the bells and in producing noise rather than in delicacy or harmony of sound; but there is no way to circumvent this instinct to pound. Nature has evidently ordained that a normal child from the eighth month on to the teens, at any rate, should be passionately fond of pounding. If baby can pound on sound-producing objects, the fascination of the exercise will be all the greater. But even if the noise made is a minor factor, he will still be interested in the mere muscular exercise. Up to the second year he will take no interest in directing his pounding in any definite way. If he uses a hammer, he will merely * ^hammer,'' but after his second year .he will begin to make his pounding more purpose- 222 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING ful. A tliree-year-olcl child would rather drive a nail with a hammer than merely pound on a board or the floor. This is the time to introduce hammer and nails, and from this point on, almost to maturity, the typical boy will be fascinated with driving nails. At first his interest will be simply in driving them without any ulterior end or aim, merely for the exercise; but as he goes on he will lose his interest in merely pounding nails, and he will drive them for some purpose — that is to say, he will try to construct objects. Ill The Ball. — Undoubtedly a ball will give a baby as much pleasure as any other one object. The sensations derived from the feeling of the ball are most agreeable. And then the uses to which the ball can be put are varied. The six-months-old baby will be interested mainly in the rolling of the ball, and this interest will continue for many months. When he becomes fairly secure on his feet, by the time he is two years old at least, new interests in the ball will arise — that is, in throw- ing it and bounding it. There is no keener pleas- ure* for a child than to throw his ball against the side of a house, say, and have it come back to him. Then in time comes the delight of catching the ball, when he bounces it himself or when it is thrown to him. Interest in these activities with FIRST TOYS AND PLAYTHINGS 223 the ball is supreme through all the years up into and often beyond the teens. Many adults like to play with balls of some sort — base balls, hand balls, tennis balls, golf balls, billiard balls and bowling balls. The value of these ball activities in the development of the child's co-ordination and self-control can hardly be over-estimated. So every baby should have his ball. Like all his other toys it should at first be made of a sub- stance which can be easily cleansed — either cel- luloid or rubber. After the second year the child will not ordinarily put his ball in his mouth, and boiling it is not so important; but during the early months it would be well if the ball could be boiled frequently in order to free it from harm- ful germs. It is certain that it will be covered with saliva every time the child uses it, and saliva, as intimated above, is a good medium for attracting and holding dust and germs. IV Breaking^ T earing ^ Throwing Activities. — The baby's curiosity to find out everything that can be discovered about the objects he handles is at the bottom of some of the traits that cause trou- ble in the household — tearing, breaking, smash- ing, throwing objects, and so on. It is as natural for a baby to smash a china dish as it is for him to handle it to see how it feels. A wise 224 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING parent will count upon it that, do what he may, the baby will purposely break some of the break- able objects he handles unless this passion is indulged by giving him playthings designed to be smashed. A baby must have experience in breaking objects, if not in his first or second or third year, then later on; it is a hunger which will be gratified some time and in some way. Therefore wise parents will provide cheap glass and china toys with the expectation that they will be broken. The baby's dishes at the table should be of inexpensive material, or else of material which cannot be broken. It is a very exceptional baby who will not sometimes throw his plate on the floor to see what will happen to it. If nothing happens, he will soon abandon the sport. But if it makes an extraordinary sound and flies to pieces, he will be greatly tempted to repeat the experience frequently during his first two years. Eemember, he is an experimentalist, and he is trying to see what he can do with everything. He has exactly the same interest fundamentally that the scientist has who constantly is seeing what he can do with the new objects he finds, only the child's experimentation is not so interesting to an adult and it is more expensive without any appreciable returns. The adult often looks upon the baby's passion to tear as a destructive impulse ; but viewed from the psychological standpoint it is simply one FIRST TOYS AND PLAYTHINGS 225 form of experimentation. A wise parent will provide his baby with material for indulging this passion. If the child has a supply of paper which he can tear at pleasure, his hunger will be- come satiated in time and he will not tear the books which he ought to preserve; though, as in the case of breaking objects, there is probably no way by which a parent can avoid some disaster to books. The only safegTiard is to keep valu- able books away from the child during his first two years, at any rate, and to let him tear value- less papers or books as frequently as he chooses. In due time the parent can make him aware of the difference between tearing a newspaper or an old magazine and tearing books that belong to father and mother and brothers and sisters. A three-year-old child can learn that when books as well as other objects are in certain places they are not to be touched. He cannot appreciate that these objects have value and so should not be injured, but he can learn to keep his hands off of them when they are in certain places, and if he has opportunity to gratify his passion in his own room, his attention can be diverted from objects of value. The child's desire to throw is closely associated in many parents ' minds mth his passion to break and smash objects. Certain it is that this passion is so profound that it mil be gratified at all hazards. Unhappy will be the child who must 226 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING make his own opportunities to indulge this pas- sion, because he will be in trouble all the time. If his parents do not provide a place for him to throw and give him soft balls to throw in the house, then he will throw whatever he can lay hands on that is throwable whenever he gets a chance, no matter whether he is inside the house or outside. The throwing impulse can be in- dulged with the pea-shooter and the sling-shot, as well as with the unaided arm, and a three-year- old child should have a pea-shooter and shoot at a target. There are throwing games that can be played in the house, as in throwing bean-bags, and the like, and one or more of these should be included among a child's toys. A Sand-pile or Sand-table, — Most persons do not think of sand as a toy; but in a very real sense it is a toy of immense value for the child. There never is a normal child who does not enjoy the feeling of sand on his skin, and especially who does not take great delight in burrowing in it and making all kinds of forms and designs with it. This passion lasts throughout life for many persons; even in old age some men and women like to play in the sand on the seashore, to cover themselves with it, and to construct figures and forms in it. But the passion is at its height be- tween the first and the ninth or tenth years. A child who does not have a sand-pile is to be pitied ; and he needs a box of it in the house dur- FIRST TOYS AND PLAYTHINGS 227 ing the winter, too. Some of the irritation and discontent of many children in winter is due to the fact that they cannot play with and in sand and soil. This difficulty can be partly overcome by using a sand-box in the nursery. If it could be made big enough so that the baby could sit in it and manipulate the sand, it would be especially serviceable. The Imitative Impulse. — As the baby grows older and the imitative impulse takes possession of him, he will use his sand-table or sand-pile for the purpose of reproducing what he sees being made around him. He will make sand-pies in imitation of his mother *s pies, for instance. He will hoe and spade in imitation of his father's hoeing and spading. In due course he will lay out streets and make caves and forts in imita- tion of what he sees or reads, and so on ad libitum. President Stanley Hall, who has told his own sand-pile experiences in his ^^The Story of a Sand-pile," has shown how the entire life of the community may be worked out by a child in his sand-pile. Plasticene is an excellent material for use in reproducing some of the objects which interest the child. The initial supply will last for years, and .afford the child unending pleasure. By means of it he can reproduce the forms of the 228 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING objects lie sees about him. He can make men and women and children and animals of every kind. He can model dishes and hats and houses, and in fact almost any object. As he grows older he can work out elaborate and dramatic situations with this material; he can have armies engaged in battle, people in parades, men riding horses, dogs chasing foxes, and so on at any length. Building Blocks . — In gratification of the child ^s hunger to reproduce the forms and activities he observes around him, building blocks will be found useful. The year-old baby will be inter- ested simply in handling the blocks, feeling of them, and throwing them around. By the second year he will use his blocks for crude construc- tions of designs that he sees or that are sug- gested to him. He will like first to build houses and barns and steeples, though an observer would not recognize them as such. He will lay out farms and roads and streets if he be given a little direction. He will also construct forms more or less aimlessly, just to see what he can make. This is one of the primary traits of the human mind, to experiment merely to see what may happen. In this experimentation the child will accidentally hit on designs that please him, and then he will try to produce these designs again. So, in reality, he becomes an inventor in his way. Some of the most useful inventions throughout the liistory of mankind have been dis- FIRST TOYS AND PLAYTHINGS 229 covered accidentally, while men were simply ex- perimenting to see what would happen. So this impulse of the child should be given free scope. He should be provided with a big box of large blocks of different forms and sizes. Tiny blocks should never be given a baby, for one reason be- cause they demand too fine, precise manipulation. In a certain sense, the larger the blocks the better they will serve the needs of the young child. They must not be so large, of course, that he can- not manage them easily. Materials for Representation. — The child's hunger to reproduce forms and to make new de- signs requires that he be supplied early with colored crayons and rough paper. By the time he is three years of age, he should have soft lead- pencils and plenty of rough paper. He should also have a blackboard, which can easily be made for any home. There are cloth blackboards on the market now which can be hung on the wall and rolled up when they are not used. They cost very little and will answer the purpose quite well. A child will gain much pleasure from these three toys and he will derive value from his exer- cise. Of course, up to the age of three and a half or four, he will simply scribble; but in his scrib- ling he has useful experience in making forms that resemble script letters. His eye will begin to discriminate between different script forms and this will be a help to him when at the age of six or 230 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING seven he comes to learn words in either printed or script form. If he uses a pencil, care should be taken that it does not overtax his nerves and muscles. This will happen if the lead is hard, or if he labors over the task of making marks. He is more likely to be free and use the whole arm movement in his scribbling if he uses chalk on a blackboard or crayon on large sheets of coarse paper. YI Riding, Sliding, Skating. — Anyone who knows young children understands that they are pas^ sionately fond of riding, sliding and skating. There is a fascination about gliding through the air which is exhibited by the sixth month. Even at this early age they are delighted to be tossed into the air. A child who learns that no harm can come to him when he is thrown up to the ceiling and caught in his father's arms wants to have the experience repeated indefinitely. He likes to swing at this age, too, if he be assured that he will not fall. This pleasure is at the bot- tom of the interest in riding bicycles, sliding down banisters, roller-skating, and the like. A parent should make as generous provision for the gratification of this hunger as can be done in the circumstances. Certainly as early as the first year, children should have roller-skates if they have any opportunity to use them. If they FIRST TOYS AND PLAYTHINGS 231 have a room to themselves there will be no harm in their roller-skating in it; but, of course, it would be better if they could be out-of-doors on a sidewalk or on the street if they would not be in danger from traffic. In the country parents who live by the side of improved . roads should permit their children to roller-skate on them; a macadam or asphalt road is fine for skating. A tricycle is a source of unending pleasure to a young child and is valuable for physical and mental development. As in skating so in riding, the child develops coordination and control. Even if he gained no valuable experience of this sort, he would at least be exhilarated by the experi- ence of riding, and exhilaration of this sort is always beneficial, physically and mentally. The Value of Mechanical Toys. — What is the value of mechanical toys like engines and trains? There are some students of childhood who have said that such toys have no value, but they probably go too far in condemning them ut- terly. These toys will have value just to the extent that they stimulate the child to exercise his ingenuity. If his cars must always be run on a fixed track and there is nothing for him to do but start them and watch them, they will have very little value for him. They will, however, occupy his attention for brief periods at a time, and so they may help him past a discontented half-hour now and again. But they will not 232 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING afford him opportunity for self-activity to such an extent as most of the other toys that have been mentioned. Mechanical animals come in the same class as engines and cars. They are diverting and they may distract the attention of children who are becoming peevish because they have nothing to do. But these automatic animals are of very little importance in the child's mental or physical development. Parents who can afford them should provide them simply to fill occasional moments when the child is tired of other activi- ties. If he gains amusement from the actions of automatic animals, this of course will be of value. Any experience which will cause a child to laugh heartily and naturally will be of benefit to him. VII The Boll. — There has been left to the last the most important of all toys — the doll. This is the girl's most highly-prized and mentally valu- able toy. There is no very marked difference in the interests of boys and girls in their toys be- fore the fourth year, say, except in respect to the doll, although the boy is more pleased with toys that permit of vigorous muscular action, while the girl is attracted more by toys that permit of fondling and care and service. These differences are much more marked after the fifth year than they are before it ; but there is a striking differ- ence in regard to doll play from the beginning. FIRST TOYS AND PLAYTHINGS 233 Psychologists have made elaborate studies of doll play. Any one who has not reflected upon it would be surprised to read the results of the in- vestigations that have been made on the almost infinite variety of activities which center about the care of and companionship with dolls. Every sort of experience which a mother could have with her flesh-and-blood baby the young girl may have in imagination with her doll. There has been much discussion of what kind and variety of dolls are most appropriate for a baby. The answer always is: The child should have dolls which will give the best opportunity for imitat- ing the activities and relations which a real mother has with a real child. Elaborately made- up dolls which are to be looked at but not cared for are of much less interest and value than simpler dolls which have to be dressed and washed and fed and nursed and caressed and put to sleep and taught manners, and so on. This requires that the child should have for her doll a make-believe laundry outfit, a cooking outfit, a medicine outfit, and whatever else will give op- portunity for her to imitate all that is done for a normal baby. Even one rag doll will be a source of mental value and a great delight if a child has these outfits so that she can reproduce what she observes her mother doing in the care of herself or others in the family. Tin Soldiers for the Boy. — The profound in- 234 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING terest which makes the doll such a delightful toy for the girl makes the tin soldier of interest to the boy; but soldiers do not afford anything like the opportunity for imitative activities that the doll affords. If possible the boy should be pro- vided with other types besides soldiers — ^ball- players, policemen, fire companies, and so on. In this way he can reproduce in his imitative play much of what he observes around him, and play of this sort will be of value for him. By means of it he will the more readily and fully learn the characteristics of the various types of persons in his world. As a final word, it may be said that any child should be pitied rather than envied who has a superfluity of toys so that he is distracted by them and so that he does not develop the pos- sibilities of any one toy. As was said at the out- set, toys will have interest and value to the ex- tent that they give opportunity for the child to be self-active in gratifying his mental and motor- hungers. Any toy which does not stimulate the child's initiative cannot be of much if any educa- tive value. It may make a momentary appeal, as in the case of a complex mechanical toy, but unless it can be used as a medium for carrying on his dy- namic and imitative activities, the interest in it will soon flag. Therefore, the simpler the toys are the more valuable they will be, provided they af- ford opportunity for original, creative activities. CHAPTER VIII FIRST STEPS IN HOME INSTRUCTION Taking the Child's Pomt of Vieiu. — Here is an account of the way one mother gave her young daughter a lesson on the piano. The child was trying to execute a very simple piece — a lullaby. The mother stood at her side counting in order to help her keep the time. The child made a mistake, holding a certain note too long, and the mother said: *^ Can't you see that you should have made that a quarter-note and you made it a half -note? Don't you remember yesterday I told you about that? Now watch closely, and don't make that mistake again. Start at the beginning, and try it over." The child did the whole piece over again, and made the same mistake. The mother was sharp with her, and said: ^^If you would only keep your attention on it, you would not do this way. Why don't you try? You must do it over until you get it." It seemed so simple to the mother that she was impatient, and she charged the child with carelessness, indifference and even 235 236 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING stupidity. But each time the child tried it she made the same blunder over this particular note. Finally the mother left the piano, saying: ^'I haven't any time to spend on a child who can't learn anything." Yesterday the child had somewhat the same experience, and she came to her task to-day afraid that she would make a mistake, and her mother would find fault with her. Of course, she would be apt to make a mistake under such con- ditions. When one is apprehensive of trouble of this kind, the trouble is likely to occur. If a grown man is afraid of cutting himself with his razor, the chances are he will do it. If a woman is afraid she will fall off from a plank crossing a stream, and she keeps her mind on the danger, she will probably never get across it. Tight- rope walkers say that if they lose their confi- dence and get it fixed in mind that they are likely to fall, the are quite apt to do so. The chief difficulty in teaching children arises out of the fact that those who have mastered acts until they have become automatic and seem ex- ceedingly simple do not know how to discover the difficulties of a novice. This mother had completely forgotten her own struggles to master the problem of time in music. It did not seem a problem to her now, and she could not put her- self in the place of the one she was trying to teach. Result: Waste, irritation, failure. HOME INSTRUCTION 237 The Mistake of Talking Too Mvrch.— The mother exhibited another common fault in teach- ing children; she tried to correct her child's error by talking to her and scolding her. It seems to be natural for most of us to think that when the young make mistakes the trouble is due to their carelessness or wilfulness, and we think the proper method of procedure is to chide them or chastise them in some way so as to make them careful. But practically every word the mother spoke to her child confused her. In a situation like this, words from a teacher are a barrier to clear thinking and proper execution; they dis- tract the attention and muddle the brain and the hand. Men who perform tricks of legerdemain always talk a good deal to their audiences. And for what purpose! Because they know that if they can attract the attention to what they are say- ing, they can prevent people from seeing all that is going on. The more they talk, the less likely they are to be caught in their tricks. A person cannot think keenly while listening to a stream of language, especially if this language is sar- castic and fault-finding in character. The mother ruined her lesson by her talk. If she had simply shown the child what to do and had adopted some device to prevent the repetition of the error, she would have saved the day. But she only scolded, and the child could not translate criticism given 238 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING in this way into understariding or proper execu- tion. The fact that the child continued to make the same error should have indicated to the mother that her methods of correcting it were ineffectual. She should have realized that the child's difficulty was more or less permanent. The time in this lesson at the crucial point was different from what the child was accustomed to, and she could not take the new step simply because the old habit was so strong that she could not break away from it. Adults Make the Same Errors as Childrcfk— Adults make exactly the same errors in principle that the child made. In the university, mature men and women, who have been superintendents and principals of schools, make errors in pro- nouncing German and French which some of the instructors think are inexcusable. The instruc- tors charge them with negligence, indifference, and even stupidity — the same sort of charges that the mother brought against her child. These men and women pronounce a foreign word ac- cording to the nearest English pronunciation. We all tend to do now as we have previously done — in speech, in conduct, in musical execu- tion, and so on, and teachers cannot correct our habits merely by condemning us, and likening us to dummies or idiots. Another Example of Bad Teaching. — Here is HOME INSTRUCTION 239 another example of a mother's teaching. A child, eleven years of age, was taking her first steps in musical execution with both hands. She was try- ing a piece which required new finger movements. She had had her first lessons with a music teacher, but her mother was now trying to carry her forAvard. The mother did not have much time for these lessons, and she was easily an- noyed at her child's mistakes. The last lesson I observed, I heard her say: ^^Why don't you use your thumb when you play that? You get all tangled up because ' you don 't use the right fingering. If you would just put your mind on it, you could do that. You made the same mistake yesterday, and I talked to you about it. Now try again. ' ' To talk much to a child who makes mistakes in finger movement is apt to be worse than use- less. If you who are reading these lines have never reflected on this matter, suppose you make an experiment on yourself. Take a lesson or two in some game you do not play — golf, tennis, billiards, or anything of the kind. Suppose you are taking your first lesson in golf. You look at the instructor grasp his club, secure his stance, go through his swing, and strike the ball. It looks easy to you, and you take the club — and do nothing just the way the instructor did it, though you thought you could do everything precisely the same way. Why can you not do exactly 240 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING what lie did? In the first place, you do not see exactly what he does — how he grasps his clnb, how he swings it, and what he does when the club strikes the ball. You see these acts in only a very general way. You miss all the really essential points. Sufficient evidence of this is found in what happens when you try to strike the ball. Now let your instructor scold you for your carelessness, indifference and stupidity. Then try it again. You will do worse than you did the first time, if this be possible. Suppose your in- structor stands off and says: **Take the club in the right way, keep your body in the right posi- tion,^' and so on. Will you know what he is talking about? You will not. Furthermore, you will become confused, irritated and discouraged. You will collapse under the criticism and no good will come from it. The situation is the same in principle as when you try to teach your child fingering on the piano, and you talk about it and complain when it is not done right. Suppose your golf instructor, instead of talk- ing to you, should take your hands and place them on your club properly, and without any comments whatever. You would then catch your cue. You could learn in this way how to place your hands better in one minute than you could in a w^hole day's mere talk from the instructor. Then suppose he actually assists you to make the HOME INSTRUCTION 241 swing SO that you get the feel of it; and then when you get the feel of it, he permits you to do it yourself. Again you catch the cue easily. He probably never could assist you much by simply talking to you. You could not translate Avhat he was saying into action. You would keep on blundering, and the more he talked and scolded, the worse off you would be. Children Will Often Correct Their Oivn Errors. — A novice often realizes that he makes errors in what he is learning, and he would correct them himself if his teacher would quietly give him the right suggestion, or would let him alone alto- gether. This is especially true in I'espect to errors in musical execution. If the parent would simply lift a finger, say, when the child makes an error he would go over the difficult part again and try to correct it. Even when a novice un- derstands what to do, the chances are that he will make an error in execution. If he could do it right with certainty, he would not be a novice at all. He would be an expert then, and he would not need a teacher. There is a vast amount of waste of time, energy, and temper in the teaching of music. Think of what it means to require a child to practice year after year for five or six years and in the end to be unable to execute any music of importance. One reason for this is that those who teach cannot take the point of view of the 242 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING novice. They cannot diagnose the learner's diffi- culties and assist him over them in the most economical way. Even experienced music teach- ers are often impatient, even irritable, and criti- cise children so that they come away from a lesson crying. This is about the best way to defeat the purpose of instruction. DonH Get Angry. — Consider this: If your child is afraid of you; if he breaks down while he is taking his lesson; if he says to you at the beginning of the lesson, ^* Please don't get angry if i don't do it right. I will do the best I can," then you are seriously at fault. If you are set- ting out to teach a child, it is your problem to lead him without irritation and without waste of time or energy to master what you are to teach him. If he does not progress as rapidly as you think he ought to, it is your problem to locate the difficulty and overcome it. It does not cut any ice for you to blame him. If you were beginning the study of Chinese, and some one who under- stood it simply flung at you, and then blamed you because you could not master it, you would think he was very crude and inefficient. Isn't it the same situation precisely when you are trying to teach a novice a thing which you know and he does not, and you spend your time criticising him? Put yourself in his place and you will be likely to be more considerate of his difficulties when you are teaching him. HOME INSTRUCTION 243 II Teaching Etiquette at Table. — What has been said in regard to the teaching of music applies to the teaching of everything. Recently a mother was observed instructing her five-year-old boy how to hold his knife and fork at table. He had become accustomed to grasp them in the way in which he could manage them best, but his mother wanted him to hold them in a more refined way. He was at one end of the table, and she sat at the other. She said: **I would like to have you take them this way'' (showing him how she took them herself). ^'This is the way that nice peo- ple hold them.^' He looked at her and made an attempt to imitate her but blundered. She said again: ^'Do as I do. Just take them in this way'' (showing again). ^^ Can't you see how I do it?" He looked but he could not ^'see," and he did not do as she did. The mother was dis- turbed and somewhat critical because she thought that what she wanted her child to do was very simple. It was for her; but it was just as diffi- cult for her boy as it would be for her to pitch a curved ball simply by looking at a man who did it. Suppose a baseball expert should have said to her: ^'Now look at me and pitch this ball just as I do, and it will curve just as you see mine doing." She would not have thought her- self stupid if she could not have done it. Isn't 244 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING it rather remarkable that we are apt to think any one is stupid who cannot do the simple things we can do, but we never think we are dull our- selves when we cannot do what other people think is simple! If the mother had gone to the child, taken his hand and put the knife and fork in the proper position, saying never a word, she would have been able to teach him without loss of time, energy, or patience. But unfortunately the ten- dency of all of us in a situation like this is to use words, words, words. Every parent and teacher should make a conscious effort to control this trait of human nature. Ill Kindergarten Methods in the Home. — There are millions of homes in this country that are not within reach of any public or private kinder- garten. The children in these homes usually have to get along as best they can in a haphazard way until they enter a primary or district school at the age of six. Unfortunately the majority of homes are not equipped so they can provide for all the mental requirements of a child during his first four or five years, and a considerable part of his time is wasted. Children who attend a well- conducted kindergarten have a great advantage over those who have no facilities except such as HO:\rE INSTRUCTION 245 are afforded by the typical home which has not taken special pains to meet the needs of young children. But it is possible to introduce some of the features of the kindergarten into any home so that young children may have the benefit of kindergarten training even if they cannot attend a kindergarten school. Only rarely can a home be a complete substitute for a good kindergarten, however, for the reason that a young child will receive valuable training from cooperating with children of his own age, and this cannot be done in his home unless children from outside are brought in. But when he cannot be sent to a kindergarten, then the next best thing is to make use so far as possible of kindergarten methods in the home. The First Requirement in Kindergarten Meth- ods. — The first requirement in employing kinder- garten methods in the home is for the mother to appreciate the importance of the spontaneous activities of the child. The kindergarten aims primarily to direct the child ^s play and to fur- nish him opportunities to express his natural in- terests more fully than he could otherwise do. The kindergarten provides for the children vari- ous kinds of materials, or as they are sometimes still called — ^* gifts,'' but they are in reality ob- jects designed to enable the child to indulge his play impulses in agreeable and educative ways. A mother who can secure all these materials for 246 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING her home will always have at hand suitable means to gratify the child's passion to have something to do. The kindergarten materials, supplemented by the equipment of the home and the playground, provide for a variety of activities, and so with occasional suggestions a child can throughout each day be kept occupied in interesting and wholesome and profitable ways. If the mother cannot purchase the kindergarten materials she can make fairly good substitutes. Sand and modelling clay occupy an important place in a good modern kindergarten. A three- year-old child mil be delighted simply in shovel- ing it into a pail and emptying it, or merely dig- ging in it, or pawing it, or lying down in it and covering his toes with it, and so on. But as he develops he will become interested in construct- ing rough designs in the sand — it may be a cave or a tunnel or a road or some other similar thing. In the same way a child of three will fiind much pleasure in handling the modelling clay for the feel of it. He will not be interested in model- ling any definite objects, but by the time he reaches his fifth birthday he will be much inter- ested in modelling objects in imitation of what he sees around him. The Ball. — In every kindergarten the ball plays an important part. Froebel assigned high intellectual value to the use of the sphere or the ball because he thought that many of the forms HOME INSTRUCTION 247 of nature were based on the pattern of the sphere. We think to-day that he over-emphasized the symbolic value of the sphere, but we attach greater importance to the use of the ball in play than he did. From the cradle to the grave almost the ball in some form ministers to the needs of childhood, youth, and adulthood. The three-year- old will take delight in rolling the ball, tossing it here and there, and especially in bounding it. The ''Gifts/'— The ''gifts'' in the kindergar- ten comprise blocks of different shapes and sizes. It should be an easy task for any home to secure a big box of blocks. They can be made by any- one who can use a saw and can secure a piece of timber, which should be at least four inches wide and two inches thick and long enough to make eight or ten blocks two inches long, and the same number six inches long, and eight inches long. The timber should be planed smooth so that the blocks can be handled by children without danger of getting splinters in the skin. With these blocks children will be kept occupied in an inter- esting way for hours every day. The three-year- old children will pile them up and tumble them over repeatedly until they begin to be fatigued. Then they can turn to their sand or their ball or other materials and use them in imitation of what they see about them. The greater the variety of shapes and sizes of blocks which they have, the greater will be the possibility of constructing 248 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING various kinds of buildings. They will keep up their building activity long after the age of ^ve provided they have a sufficient variety of blocks to indulge their developing interests. In any good kindergarten one will find wooden beads for stringing. These beads may be of dif- ferent sizes and shapes and colors. They must be large enough so that they can be strung without nervous strain. Formerly children were com- pelled to string small beads and thread needles with small eyes, but that kind of work has been completely abandoned in kindergartens and it should never be required in the home. It should be an easy matter for a mother who can not pur- chase these beads to have square ones made. A saw, a piece of wood, and a bit and brace are all that are required. Another piece of apparatus found in the kindergarten is a board containing a hundred holes into which pegs may be fitted. Various de- signs can be worked out on the board by arrang- ing the pegs in different ways. The pegs may be plain or colored. Any mother can appreciate what fascination such a board would have for a child four or five years of age, and how educa- tional it could be made. All that will be re- quired in order to make it of value will be for the mother to give the child a few suggestions from time to time for new designs that can be worked out on the board. HOME INSTRUCTION 249 Of course every well-conducted kindergarten has toys such as rubber dogs, horses and the like, and these are used for dramatizing stories. For girls there are always simple dolls with which children can do many things that every mother well understands.' Constructive Activities. — The kindergarten gives a large place to constructive activities, such as making doll houses out of paper, for instance. Also, the children have sticks which they lay in various forms so as to build barns and fences and construct trees and furniture and imple- ments. They have crayons and paints with which they make pictures and color them, and they make designs in forms and in colors. They have scis- sors and cut out paper to illustrate stories, as '^The Three Bears'' and *'Eed Hiding Hood,'' and so on. They cut fruit forms out of paper. In a good kindergarten children learn how to tear paper, too, so as to make various forms. In this way, they can make trees, houses, sail- boats, and so on. A resourceful mother could have all these mate- rials in her home. They are inexpensive and with a little direction she could help her children to do most of the things that are done in a kindergarten — probably not as well as they are done in a good kindergarten, but still they could be done well enough to keep the children inter- ested and to give them helpful experience in con- 250 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING stnicting objects and dramatizing every-day ac- tivities. From what has been said it will be seen that the fundamental purpose of the kindergarten is to provide opportunities for the child to be self- active in beneficial ways. This is the chief point which the parent needs to appreciate. It will help any mother who has not had training in a kindergarten to read a good book on kindergarten materials and methods such as Smith's ^^The Home-made Kindergarten ' ' and Atwood's ** Theory and Practice of the Kindergarten.'' It is not necessary that a mother, as some seem to think, should study the Froebelian philosophy deeply in order to appreciate the principles un- derlying the kindergarten and to apply them with some success in her home. IV The Kindergarten for Nervous Children, — Mothers are constantly asking whether the kindergarten is a good place for children who are inclined to be nervous. Usually kindergartners are well poised and they have a soothing influence on children. This is not always the case ; but the typical kindergartner is apt to be more restful than the typical mother. Moreover, when a highly-organized child is in school with other children who are not nervous, he is likely to be- HOME INSTRUCTION 251 come less nervous himself. Nervousness is a matter of suggestion and imitation to a consider- able extent. Take a home in which there are two or three children, one of them inclined to be nervous. Let the mother have various duties, some of which relate to maintaining the social status of the household in the community. The chances are she will be easily irritated, and will become over- solicitous about the nervous child. This will magnify his nervousness, and it will go from bad to worse. Take such a child out of the home, and put him in a kindergarten with other chil- dren who do not get over-excited, and with a teacher who has herself well under control, and it will be of positive benefit to him from the standpoint of allaying nervousness. Then when a child is occupied in an interesting way, his nerves will gain poise and stability. Many children are made nervous because they have nothing interesting to do, and they are con- tinually irritated. They get discontented and peevish, and they are apt to irritate the mother, and this will increase the child's nervousness, and so one gets what the physicians call a vicious circuit. In a well-conducted kindergarten children are not over-stimulated; they are not frightened or irritated ; they do not sit a long time in one posi- tion; the spirit in the room is wholesome and all 252 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING the experiences of the children are normal and healthful. Of course, these ideal conditions are not found in every kindergarten, but it is safe to say that they are found as frequently in the kindergarten as they are in the home. Nervous Children Need Companionship. — Many children who are kept away from others develop self-centeredness which is likely to pro- duce an irritable, nervous disposition. Further, unless they have association with other children, they are apt to be self-conscious when they are put into school. The kindergarten is a more natural introduction to school life than is the typical primary school. On the other hand, in a kindergarten in which the children show no respect for the kindergartner, and where they fall into the habit of treating school work as a joke, harm will be done. Sometimes a child who is in a kindergarten gains the notion that he need never apply himself in school, and especially he need not do anything which is not play for him. It would not be wise to send a child to such a kindergarten. But where there is one kinder- garten like this in the public schools to-day there are fifty of a different character. Often one hears the complaint that the kinder- garten tends to rob a child of his individuality. But the first thing in this life for a child to learn is to adapt himself to others. Where one child is spoiled by being made too much like others, HOME INSTRUCTION 253 twenty-five are left unfitted for life because they cannot adjust themselves to others. A child must be much more responsive to the people around him to-day than was necessary fifty years ago because there are more people to deal with. If every person did as he pleased and developed his idiosyncrasies in modern life, we would have a race of cranks, and social life would be impos- sible. The First Steps in Writing. — Ask a child of four to perform a finely coordinated task, as writ- ing with a sharp-pointed pen, and he will try to execute it by mere force. When he undertakes a precise task like threading a needle, for exam- ple, he says in effect, ' ^ This is very hard. I must make a great effort to do it. I must use all the power I have.'' When the adult undertakes a task like this he says : ' ' This requires exact control of the fingers without much use of the muscles so that there is no need to expend force on it." When a well- developed adult is writing you cannot observe muscular tensions in his face, or hands, or even in the fingers which are controlling the pen. There is little muscular effort expended; there is simply precise coordination. But now observe a beginner, and you will often notice strain not only in the fingers that are being used, but also in 254 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING those that are not used in the writing, and even in the muscles in his feet and legs and elsewhere in his body. We should try to prevent young pupils from writing in a cramped way in the beginning. Here is a device for accomplishing this. A child four years of age had been having short lessons in writing for a few wrecks. She wrote in the strained, over-done manner mentioned above. She had learned to write several words like ''hen," ''wig," and "pig." When she was asked to write one of these she would grasp her pencil tightly and bend over her paper ; her body would become rigid, her head would go around with her fingers ; and she would write slowly and with great muscular effort. She thought ejfort or force instead of coordination and delicate manipu- lation was what was required. In her writing up to this time she had used a pencil of small diameter and hard lead, which aggravated the tendency to squeeze it and "bear on." For the small pencil one of large diameter with soft lead was substituted. Then the child was asked to hold the pencil lightly in the fingers. Taking her hand, I helped her to swing it around easily on the word "hen." Her attention was called to the light looking line she had just made compared with the line she had been making, and said to her that we wanted to make as light a line as we could. After we had together written HOME INSTRUCTION 255 the word rapidly and lightly, she was asked to try it herself. When she felt the full responsibility of the task she was impelled to squeeze the pencil and apply force. But by taking her hand again and impressing the idea of tvriting rapidly and making a light line it was not long before she caught the notion of rapidity and lightness, though, of course, she would easily slip back into her original tendency to write slowly and labori- ously and ^'bear on." We kept at our task for several minutes each day for a few weeks, and at the end of the experiment the child could write more lightly and rapidly and with much less muscular strain. It is best for a pupil to write at the outset with crayon or with pencil of large diameter and soft lead. The smaller the pencil, the more difficult it is for a novice to make a light line with it, and the greater will be his tendency to press in his writing. Big Tools for Small Hands. — Some parents secure very small, fragile toys and tools for their youngest children. For the older ones they pro- vide comparatively large blocks, dolls and so on. They act on the theory that the small hand of the young child is suited to manage only small, delicate objects, while the larger hand of the youth is adapted to the manipulation of big things. The young child can manage his biceps better 256 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING than he can the tips of his fingers. The part of his brain that controls the biceps is better devel- oped in a very small child than the part that con- trols the adjustment of the thmnb and fingers to and with each other. The infant cannot coor- dinate his thumb with his fingers so as to per- form a fine task. This is why we say that an infant's fingers are all thumbs. Observe the hand of the infant, and see how crude an instru- ment it is when he attempts to perform a precise task with it. The large, coarse, brawny hand of the man is much more delicate and coordinated than the hand of the year-old child when consid- ered with regard to the execution of precise tasks, such as threading a needle. Observe a six-months-old child trying to pick up a pin or ravelling on the floor. The thumb and fingers will be managed in a crude, awkward way so that most children of this age cannot pick up any small object. The two-year-old can do this better than the six-months '-old child. If the child develops normally, he can at the age of six so control the fingers in relation to the thumb that he can thread a needle, say, though if it has a small eye, he will have difficulty with it. The typical two-year-old child cannot easily perform this task because his nervous system is not devel- oped so that such highly coordinated actions can be executed. The Child Does Not Lack Strength. — One HOME INSTRUCTION 257 sometimes hears a mother say : ^ ^ My three-year- old child cannot sew because he hasn't strength enough." He has strength and plenty of it, but he cannot use it properly in the performance of fine, precise tasks. He cannot articulate difficult vocal combinations, but he has a superabundance of crude vocal power. He can make plenty of noise, as any parent will testify. A wise mother will always surround an infant at table with an area of rubber cloth, because she will realize that he cannot carry a spoonful of milk, say, to his mouth without spilling it. He has enough strength to do this, but he cannot control its use so as to perform so delicate a task. No mother would let a two-year-old handle a sharp razor. He may realize that he should be careful or he wdll cut himself, but he lacks the fine control or coordination necessary to use edged tools with precision. Numberless illustra- tions of this principle might be cited. Conditions That Prevent Coordination. — Feeble-minded persons never develop a high de- gree of coordination. A man may be thirty years of age physically, but he may have a hand that is crude, uncoordinated, and incapable of execut- ing any precise task. He may be as strong as an ox in his biceps, but as uncoordinated and non- precise as an infant in his actions. Control of the hand so that a great variety of delicate ad- justments may be made is impossible without 258 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING full development of the nervous system and of the intelligence. It is significant to note that when a mam be- comes drunk he loses the coordination of his fin- gers and his tongue. Alcohol attacks the highest nervous centers first, those that control the most coordinated or accessory muscular activities. The drunken man may have his biceps and fist under control so that he can fight as well as ever, but he may not be able to hold a pen in his fingers so that he can write. As he is getting drunk he spills his whiskey, because he cannot coordinate his fingers so that he can hold his glass securely. He falls back speedily to the uncoordinated con- dition of infancy. The Child Should Not Be Pushed in the De- velopment of Coordination. — In order that the child may develop coordination properly he should not be crowded too fast in the manipula- tion of small tools of any sort — those demanding precise adjustments. A child of three or even four or five or six years who is required to thread a needle frequently will probably be over-taxed by it. Observe him and you will notice undue strain and tension in his face and body. There is evidence to show that children who are made to sew at the age of four or five are injured in their nervous development. It will be better for a young child to be using a hammer or saw or plane or to be running, jumping, throwing, and the HOME INSTRUCTION 259 like, than to be sewing, or weaving with raffia, or anything of the kind. When children begin school at the age of five, teachers sometimes require them to write with pens or hard pencils. This is likely to injure them. If nothing worse, it will waste their nerv- ous energy, because they always overdo a task of this kind. Young children can write without strain with chalk in large, free movements from five to ten times as long as they can write with a pen or a hard lead pencil. Often parents provide penholders with small metal grips for their children. Observe a young child using such a pen, and you will see that he can manage it only with strain and tension. He will soon become fatigued because the task de- mands too great coordination. It would be bet- ter for him if he did not write with a pen until his seventh or eighth year, and even then he should use one with a large cork grip and a blunt point. Children who are required to read books with very fine print are apt to waste nervous energy, and they may develop eye strain. The use of a microscope for hours each day by high-school pupils is likely to overtax the muscles of accom- modation. The principle is universal in its ap- plication to all the work of pupils in the elemen- tary or the high school, — that whatever work requires the child or the youth to coordinate 260 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING beyond liis stage of development frequently and for long periods mil probably injure him. The moral is — a young child should have large tools and toys and perform only general and relatively uncoordinated actions. As he develops let his tools and his activities become smaller and more precise until by the time he reaches matur- ity, he should be able to use accurately imple- ments requiring a high degree of coordination and precise adjustments. ' VI In the World of Make Believe. — A group of children about five years of age were observed playing in a nursery this morning. One of the children was a ^'kindergartener" and the others were pupils. There was no kindergarten mate- rial, no desks, no piano, no flowers; in short, there was no kindergarten equipment in the nursery. But those children did about every- thing that is ordinarily done in a kindergarten. The first event on the program was a march. One girl went over to the window-sill and began drumming on it with her fingers. The *' kinder- gartener" said, ''Now listen to the piano, and before you begin to march get in step." Then she used her hand as a baton, and said, "You can all hear the music, can't you! This is the best music we have had. Miss H — is a fine player." HOME INSTRUCTION 261 So the children marched around in step to the *^ music." They were entirely in earnest; so were the ''pianist" and the ''kindergartener." After they had marched a while the "kinder- gartener" called out, "Miss H— , you may stop playing." Then she said, "Children, you may all take your seats at the table and you may make any animals you wish with your plasticine." The children squatted doAvn on the floor and be- gan making movements as though they were actu- ally modelling plasticine, though they did not have any material whatever. After a little time spent in "modelling" one child held up her hand and said, "Look at what a big rabbit I have made." She had put her fingers in a position that she thought suggested a rabbit. In a moment another child held up her hand and said, "Look at my squirrel." So it went on until every child had "modelled" some animal. The children were all serious and the "kindergartener" praised or criticised the animals shown her. After about ten minutes the "piano" was sounded again. The children got up and went through another "march." Then they passed to the "tables" and began making designs with their "splints." First one child and then an- other would ask the "kindergartener" to look at the design that had been made, tracing on the floor with the fingers to attract attention to it. They went on this way for an hour or more, 262 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING dramatizing the kindergarten. They appeared to be about as well satisfied as if they had all the furnishings and equipment found in a well- arranged kindergarten. The Child Dramatizes the Life Around Him, — The incident is typical of a normal child ^s life up to the tenth or even the twelfth year. Always he is dramatizing the life about him; always he is playing a part. The whole world is a stage and he is the chief player on it. Everything is or may become something else to him. Any reader who needs to have his memory refreshed regarding the make-believe of the child and espe- cially his passion for what the psychologists call '^symbolism'' — which is the process of men- tally transforming an object into something en- tirely different from what it actually is and assuming an attitude toward it and using it as though it were the thing it is imagined to be — should read Robert Louis Stevenson's ^^A Child's Garden of Verses,'' or Eugene Field's or James Whitcomb Riley's poems and stories of child- hood. The Love of Symbolism. — The child's love of symbolism is at the bottom of a trait which often disturbs parents. When he comes in from the street and tells his mother that he saw a bear run past the house and he persists in his **fib," the mother may feel that he is telling a lie. The fact is he may have seen a cat or a dog run past HOME INSTRUCTION 263 the house and his fancy transformed it into a bear. Bears were in his mind. He may have heard a bear story in the morning and he may have played he was a bear during the day; con- sequently his consciousness was filled with bears, so almost anything he saw could be easily inter- preted to be a bear. A child often can hardly discriminate between what he imagines and what he actually sees or hears in the world about him. It is undoubtedly the case that frequently a child ^s fancies are stronger than his observa- tions and he sees what is in his mind and not what is presented from without. The reality of vivid dreams in adult life re- sembles the phenomenon of vivid fancies in child- hood. An adult may awaken from a dream and be unable to tell whether he has had an actual experience or only an imaginary one. Even grown people often awaken in night terror and imagine that they see terrible creatures about them; but the creatures exist only in their dis- ordered fancy. As a child grows older he should normally bring the pictures of his fancy under control, so that he can distinguish between what comes in through his senses on the one side and what arises in his imagination on the other. The ten-year-old child may and usually does live in a make-believe world to a greater or less extent, but he should be able to tell the difference be- 264 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING tween make-believe situations and real ones, thougli it is too much to expect that he will be entirely accurate in reporting his experiences or the objects he sees. Indeed, most adults can- not report what they see or what happens to them with absolute accuracy, provided that they are in any way personally interested in or affected by the objects or the events which they attempt to describe. Training in Accurate Reporting. — A parent who has a four- or five- or six-year-old child who lives in a make-believe world most of the time need not be apprehensive that he will never be able to see and report things as they are and events as they occur. At the same time, it is desirable when a child reaches the age of five or six, and increasingly as he grows older, that he should be helped to give an accurate report con- cerning some of the objects he sees and what happens about him. When he starts to school and has lessons in arithmetic and nature study and geography and manual activities he should be required then carefully to distinguish between what he fancies and what he actually sees or ex- periences. There will be little danger if he has good instruction that he will go up into the teens thinking that imaginary objects and happenings are real and report them as such; if he does do this his case is a special one and he should be given special attention. HOME INSTRUCTION 265 VII Dramatics for Children. — Every normal child is an imitator before he becomes original in any waking life dramatizing what he has observed in waking life dramatizing what he has observed in the people or the animals around him. This is the way he learns. If he did not imitate in this manner, he would be an imbecile. When he imi- tates his mother making pies, he learns how to do the thing, and so he understands it. When he copies the actions of a bear — lapping up his food and growling at the people who speak to him — he is learning the beards characteristics. When he gets the bear's personality thoroughly in his system he will take up a new imitation — a horse, a dog, a teacher, a preacher, or some other object. The more of these objects he copies, the more rapidly he will learn the world around him, and also the better he will learn it. A parent who would prevent his children from dramatizing practically everything that goes on around them would interfere with their develop- ment. Instead of preventing them he should encourage them to enlarge the scope of their dramatizations. There ought to be opportunities to have dramatics in the home and in the school. It should be the object in these dramatics to give children a large variety of models to emulate and characters to personate. 266 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING A group of children spent several months dramatizing some of the Greek stories in which the characters were gods and goddesses. These children know more to-day about the character- istics of the Greek mythological characters than do their fathers and mothers, and they will not forget them. Once a child has played the part of Jupiter, say, he will remember the character as long as he lives. In all up-to-date schools chil- dren have an opportunity to take part in dram- atics ; and much of what is studied in history and literature is dramatized. Take the story of Columbus, for instance, before the court of Spain, crossing the Atlantic, dealing with the natives in the new country, and so on. These situations can all be represented by children with readiness; and when they act out one of these scenes, they gain a clear impression of the facts they should learn. They are usually very much interested in this activity, and they carefully study their char- acters and the customs of the time in order that they may play their parts well. What a child acquires in this manner is apt to abide with him to the end of his days. There is another point of importance. An adult who has never had any experience in play- ing a part is likely to be stiff, embarrassed and self-conscious if he personates any one else. He is afraid to abandon his own narrow personality. Such a person is inclined to be exceedingly re- HOME INSTRUCTION 267 stricted in his activities. He does not get as much out of life or give as much to others as do people whose personalities are more plastic and pliable. For this reason, if for no other, children should have opportunities to take an active part in dramatization. If an opportunity be presented early it will not be necessary to urge the normal child to take an interest in such work because it is his nature to do so. If he has no chance to do any of it until he has entered his teens, however, he may be so self-conscious that he will not enjoy it and he may not gain much value from it. CHAPTER IX BOOKS ON CHILD TRAINING The following books are designed for persons who are responsible for the care and culture of the young. They have been selected from a large amount of literature dealing with child nature and education primarily because of their modern view-point, even though a few of them were writ- ten long ago, and also because of their concrete, simple, and attractive method of discussing the topics which they treat. Most of them can be read with profit and pleasure by teachers and parents who have not pursued courses in psychol- ogy and related sciences, and these are designated by stars. The books have been grouped accord- ing to the phases of child nature and education to which they severally give special attention; but this grouping is only approximately accurate, since, while the majority of the books treat one phase of child life and education in particular, they nevertheless give some attention to other phases. 268 BOOKS ON CHILD TRAINING 269 A GENERAL VIEW OP CHILD NATURE AND EDUCATION *Abbott *Birney *Fisher *Forbush *Gillman *Groszmann *Gruenberg *Gruenberg *Hallam ♦Harrison Jacoby *Key Kirkpatrick *Loti *Marenholtz- Biilow *Winterbum On tbe Training of Par- ents The Child in Home, School and State Mothers and Children The Coming Generation Concerning Children The Career of the Child Sons and Daughters Your Child To-day and To-morrow Studies in Child De- velopment A Study of Child Nature from the Kindergar- ten Standpoint Child Training as an Exact Science The Centurj' of the Child The Individual in the Making The Story of a Child The Child and Child Na- ture From the Child's Stand- point B Houghton Miflin Co. National Congress of Mothers Henry Holt & Co. D. Appleton & Co. Small, Maynard & Co. Badger Henry Holt & Co. J. B. Lippincott Co. Row, Peterson & Co. Chicago Kindegarten College Funk and Wagnalls G. P. Putnam Sons Houghton Miflin Co. C. C. Berchard & Co. Swan, Sonnenschein Co. Baker & Taylor PHYSICAL DEVELOPMENT AND WELFARE Ginn & Company Houghton Miflin Co. Doubleday, Page & Co. W. B. Saunders Co. J. B. Lippincott Co. D. Appleton & Co. Ginn & Co. Longmans, Green & Co. The Macmillan Co. W. B. Saunders Co. D. Appleton Co. Doubleday, Page & Co. *Allen Civics and Health ♦Allen Home, School and Va- cation Ayres Open-Air Schools Bandler The Expectant Mother *Bryant School Feeding Burks Health and the School Curtis Play and Recreation Campbell Practical Motherhood ♦Dennett The Healthy Baby Griffith Care of the Baby *Holt Care and Feeding of Children ♦Hutchinson We and Our Children 270 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING *Lee Offner *Oppenlieim *0'Shea & Kellogg *0'Sliea & Kellogg *0'Sliea & Kellogg ♦Patrick *Peabody *Rapeer *Read Rowe Sadler Play in Education The Macmillan Co. Mental Fatigue Warwick & York Care of the Child in The Macmillan Co, Health Health Habits The Macmillan Co. Health and Cleanliness The Macmillan Co. The Body in Health The Macmillan Co. Psychology of Relaxa- Houghton Miflin Co. tion Education in the Home, Swan, Sonnenschein the Kindergarten and Co. the Primary School Educational Hygiene Chas. Scribner's Sons Mothercraft Manual Little, Brown & Co. The Physical Nature of The Macmillan Co. the Child and How to Study it Physiology of Faith and A. C. McClurg & Co. Fear Stearns cfal. Types of Schools for Bobbs-Merrill Co. Boys Terman The Hygiene of the Houghton Miflin Co. School Child *TyIer Growth and Education Houghton Miflin Co. INTELLECTUAL DEVELOPMENT AND WELFARE *Burbank Colvin & Bagley *Gesell *James *Kirkpatrick Major O'Shea *Shinn *Stoner *Swift *Terman The Training of the The Century Co. Human Plant Human Behavior The Normal Child and Primary Education Talks to Teachers, etc. Fundamentals of Child Study First Steps in Mental Growth Linguistic Development and Education The Biography of a Baby Natural Education Learning by Doing The Measurement of In- telligence The Macmillan Co. Ginn & Company Henry Holt & Co. The Macmillan Co. The Macmillan Co. The Macmillan Co. Houghton Miflin Co. Bobbs-Merrill Co. Bobbs-Merrill Co. Houghton Miflin Co. BOOKS ON CHILD TRAINING 271 EMOTIONAL DEVELOPMENT AND WELFARE *0'Shea Sadler Seashore *Sully Social Development and Houghton Miflin Co. Education Worry and Nervousness Psychology in Daily Life Studies of Childhood A. C. McClurg & Co. D. Appleton & Co. D. Appleton & Co. E MORAL DEVELOPMENT AND TRAINING Abbott Adler Bagley *Bimey *Cabot Forbush George Griggs *Healy Holmes Morehouse *Mumford *Puffer Rousseau Rugh *Schoft Sisson *Sneath & Hodges *Spencer *Weimar On the Training of Par- ents Moral Instruction of Children School Discipline Childhood Ethics for Children The Coming Generation The Junior Republic Moral Education Honesty The Principles of Char- acter Making The Discipline of the School The Dawn of Character The Boy and His Gang £mile Moral Training in the Public School The Wayward Child Essentials of Character Moral Training in the School and the Home Education (Chap, on Moral Instruction) The Way to the Heart of the Pupil Houghton Miflin Co. D. Appleton & Co. The Macmillan Co. F. A. Stokes Co. Houghton Miflin Co. D. Appleton & Co. D. Appleton & Co. B. W. Huebsch Bobbs-Merrlll Co. J. B. Lippincott Co. D. C. Heath Longmans Green & Co. Houghton Miflin Co. D. Appleton & Co. Ginn & Company Bobbs-Merrill Co. The Macmillan Co. The Macmillan Co. Hurst & Co. The Macmillan Co. SOCIAL DEVELOPMENT AND TRAINING Cooley Human Nature and the Chas. Scribner's Sons Social Order *Elsom & Social Games and Group J. B. Lippincott Co. Trilling Dances 272 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING *Pisher Self-Reliance Groos The Play of Man Mangold Child Problems O'Shea Social Development and Education *Scott Social Education White Book of Children's Par- ties Bobbs-Merrill Co. D. Appleton & Co. The Macmillan Co. Houghton Miflin Co. Ginn & Company The Century Co. SCHOOL AND HOME EDUCATION ♦Andrews The Girl of To-morrow in "The School of To- morrow" Bancroft Games for the Play- ground, Home, School and Gymnasium *Berle The School in the Home Cook & The Child and His O'Shea Spelling *Dean The Boy of To-morrow in "The School of To- morrow" Dewey The School and Society *Dewey The Schools of To-mor- row Fisher A Montessorl Mother *Hodge Nature Study and Life *Holmes Backward Children Johnson Education by Plays and Games Locke Some Thoughts Con- cerning Education ♦Montessorl The Montessorl Method ♦O'Shea Every-day Problems in Teaching O'Shea (Editor) The World Book; Organized Knowledge in Story and Picture (contains 120 articles on teach- ing), 10 vols. ♦O'Shea Dynamic Factors in Education Parsons Children's Gardens for Pleasure, Health and Education Doubleday, Page & Co. The Macmillan Co. Moffat, Yard & Co. Bobbs-Merrill Co. Doubleday, Page & Co. Univ. of Chicago Press The Macmillan Co. Henry Holt & Co. Ginn & Company Bobbs-Merrill Co. Ginn & Company Cambridge University Press F. A. Stokes Co. Bobbs-Merrill Co. Hanson Bellows Co. The Macmillan Co. Sturgis & Walton BOOKS ON CHILD TRAINING 273 *Smith The Homemade Kinder- garten *Spencer Education *Stoner Natural Education Weeks The Education of To- morrow Weeks The People's School ^Wilson Motivation of School Work H Houghton Miflin Co. Hurst & Co. Bobbs-Merrill Co. Sturgis & Walton Houghton Miflin Co. Houghton Miflin Co. RELIGIOUS EDUCATION Bushnell Christian Nurture Chas. Scribner's Sons Coe Education in Religion Fleming H. Revell Co. and Morals *Hodges Training of Children in D. Appleton & Co. Religion *MoxIey Girlhood and Character Abingdon Press *St. John Stories and Story Tell- The Pilgrim Press ing I CHILD LIFE AND EDUCATION UNDER VARYING CONDITIONS Bigelow Sex Education The Macmillan Co. ♦Breckinridge The Delinquent Child Survey Associates, Inc. & Abbott and the Home * Carney Country Life and the Row, Peterson & Co. Country School Hall & Betts Better Rural Schools Bobbs-Merrill Co. Hutton A Boy I Knew, and Four Harper & Bros. Dogs *Johnston Home Occupations for G. W. Jacobs & Co. Boys and Girls Scripture Stuttering and Lisping The Macmillan Co. Thorndike Individuality Houghton Miflin Co. GENERAL TRAITS AND NEEDS OF CHILDHOOD Ayres Laggards in our Schools Survey Associates, Inc. Bates & Orr Pageants and Pageantry Ginn & Company *Bryant How to Tell Stories to Houghton Miflin Co. Children *Gulick The Healthful Art of Doubleday, Page & Co. Dancing 274 FIRST STEPS IN CHILD TRAINING Hartt The People at Play *Holmes The Conservation of the Child *Herts The Children's Educa- tional Theatre *HaiTison Misunderstood Children Needham Folk Festivals Shields The Making and Unmak- ing of a Dullard Simons & Orr Dramatization *Welsh Stories Children Love *Wyche Some Great Stories and How to Tell Them Houghton Miflin & Co. J. B. Lippincott Co. Harper & Bros. The Century Co. B. W. Huehsch Catholic Educational Press Scott, Forsman & Co. Dodge Publishing Co. Newson & Co. INDEX Accurate Reporting, training in 264-265 Adults, subject to same errors as children 233 Alexander, views on importance of posture 61-52 Anger, treatment of 88-90 nipping a tantrum in the bud 90-92 in teaching 242 Argumentation, passion to win in 148-149 Aristotle, on the benefits derived by children from crying 192 "Baby Talk" 157-159 and speech defects 159-160 Backward Children, treatment of 85-88 Ball, as child's plaything 222-223 as used in the kindergarten 246-247 Beads, as used in the kindergarten 248 Bells, as playthings for child 220-222 Big Tools, for small hands 255-256 Bill-of-Fare, when the teeth appear 39-41 Books, on child training 268-274 "Bossing," among members of a family 137-139 Breaking Objects, in childhood 223-224 "Brotherly Love," as revealed in the relations of brothers and sisters 133-136 rivalry in a family 136-137 a boy will not be "bossed" by a brother 137-138 Building Blocks, as ministering to the child's needs in play 228-229 Callousness, development of in ethical training 92 "Carelessness," one cause of • 103 Child, must be made socially efficient 122-123 Children's Errors, often corrected by themselves if let alone , 241-242 Children's Rights, in the city 115-119 adjustment of interests of child and adult 117-119 Child's Point of View, in ethical training 102-104 to be taken account of in teaching 235-236 City, handicaps sense development of child 29-30 275 276 INDEX City Life, likely to over-excite children 56-57 reducing nervous strain in 57-58 in relation to hygiene of the foot 63-65 in relation to the development of endurance 75-76 Classical Writers, advise against use of rod 197-198 Columbus, story of, dramatized by children 266 Commands, nature's commands to the child 77-78 avoid direct 92-95 deferred 100-102 long-range 105-107 Community Hygiene, in preserving the child's health.. 75-76 Companions, choosing 142-143 neither wealth nor social station is considered 143-144 adults as companions of the young 144-146 Companionship, needed by nervous children 252-253 Condiments, in a child's diet 42-43 Concentration, training of 34-35 Concreteness, in ethical teaching 82-83 Consistency, in ethical teaching 82-83 Constructive Activities, in the kindergarten 249-250 kindergarten for nervous children 250-252 nervous children need companionship 252-253 Contention, between parents and children 149-150 Coordination, conditions that prevent 257-258 child should not be pushed in 258-259 Corporal Punishment, abolition of 197-201 classical writers advise against use of rod 197-198 forbidden in France 198-199 in the home 201-205 Crying, treatment of 191-193 neighbors do not interfere 193-194 Cues, from facial expression in gaining meanings 168-169 Decay, as induced by disuse 69-70 Deferred Commands, as source of trouble in ethical training 100-102 Dietetic Habits (see Health Training). Different Ages, different foods for 38-39 Disagreement, between parents in ethical training 107-109 "Disobedience," one cause of 104 Disuse, leads to decay 69-70 Doll, in a child's play 232-233 elaborately made up dolls 233 Dramatic Instinct, in ethical training 95-96 Dramatics, for children 265-267 Dramatization, child's love of 262 Drum, as child's plaything 220-222 INDEX 277 Emulation, in ethical training 96-97 Errors in Speech, correcting 161-163 Ethical Lessons, concrete and consistent 82-83 Ethical Training, first steps in 77-119 nature's commands to the child 77-79 the first requirement in ethical training 79-82 ethical lessons must be concrete and consistent. . . . 82-83 regularity in training 83-85 the treatment of backward children 85-88 the treatment of anger 88-90 nipping a tantrum in the bud 90-92 avoid the direct command 92-95 make use of the dramatic instinct 95-97 one cause of obstinacy 98-100 deferred commands 100-102 taking the child's point of view 102-104 nagging 104-105 long-range commands 105-107 when parents disagree 107-109 correcting faults by substitution 109-110 learning to serve 110-112 training character in the schoolroom 112-113 pets for the boy and the girl 113-115 children's rights in the city 115-117 how the problem can be solved 117-119 Etiquette, teaching at table 243-244 Exposure, evil results of 74-75 Family, rivalry in 136-137 Fastidious, making children too 45-46 Faults, to be avoided in social training 127-128 First Requirement, in ethical training 79-82 First Steps, in intellectual training 13-35 in health training 36-76 in ethical training 77-119 in social training 120-154 in language training 155-186 in training disposition 186-214 in home instruction 235-267 Foot, as affecting posture 62-63 hygiene of walking on hard surfaces 63-65 girls as chief sufferers from neglect of foot hygiene. 65-66 France, corporal punishment forbidden in 198-199 Free Play, essential in social education 125-127 Gentle Measures, in training disposition 195-196 Gesture, in mastering speech 172-173 "Gifts," as used in the kindergarten 247-248 278 INDEX Girls, as chief sufferers from neglect of foot hygiene. . . 65-66 Give-and-Take, in learning ethical lessons 79-82 in social training 127-128 Grammatical Errors, common in child speech 177-179 Grammatical Relations, the child's diflBcultv in master- ing 177-180 Greek Stories, dramatized by children 266 Habits, dietetic 36-37 indoor 53-54 outdoor 54-55 that weaken resistance 66-69 rhythm in 190-191 cannot be broken suddenly 194-195 Hardening the Body, by use of cold water 49-52 conditions to be observed in giving the bath 52 Harshness, versus indulgence in social training 128-129 Health Training, first steps in 36-76 dietetic habits of chief importance 36-37 different uses of food 37-38 different foods for different ages 38-39 the bill-of-fare when the teeth appear 39-41 sugar should be used sparingly 41-42 no condiments in a child's food 42-43 over-eating 43-45 making children too fastidious 45-46 meat not the best food for children 46-48 stimulating beverages 48-49 hardening the body 49-53 the indoor habit 53-54 the outdoor habit 54-55 children are easily over-excited 55-56 city life likely to over-excite children 56-57 reducing nervous strain in the city 57-58 sleep as a restorer of nervous health 58-59 conditions that disturb sleep 59-60 neglect of an important health factor 61-62 posture affected by the development of the foot 62-63 life in the city gives rise to new problems 63-65 girls are the chief sufferers 65-66 habits that weaken resistance 66-69 a natural law, — disuse leads to decay 69-70 the intellectual vs. the physical 70-71 the law works both ways 72 physical results of "refined" living 72-74 the solution of the problem 75-76 Holding an Infant, different modes of 188-189 Home Instruction, first steps in 235-267 taking the child's point of view 235-236 INDEX 279 the mistake of talking too much 237-238 adults make the same errors as children 238 example of bad teaching 238-241 children will often correct their own errors 241-242 anger 242 teaching etiquette 243-244 kindergarten methods in the home 244-245 the first requirement in kindergarten methods 245-246 the ball 246-247 the "gifts," 247-249 constructive activities 249-250 the kindergarten for nervous children 250-252 nervous children need companionship 252-253 first steps in writing 253-255 big tools for small hands 255-256 the child does not lack strength 256-257 conditions that prevent coordination 257-258 the child should not be pushed in the development of coordination 258-260 in the world of make believe 260-262 the child dramatizes the life around him 262 the love of symbolism 262-264 training in accurate reporting 264 dramatics for children 265 Hunger, for social contact 132-133 primary mental hungers 215-220 Independence, vs. captiousness 140-141 Individual Differences, in learning language 180-185 Indoor Habit 53-54 Indulgence, vs. harshness in social training 128-129 Infant, effect on of different modes of holding 188-189 should be let alone by strangers 189-190 Instinct, vs. intelligence 18-19 Intellectual Training, first steps in 13-35 , first signs of intelligence 13-14 sense hunger 14-15 test of intelligence 15-16 degree of intelligence at different ages 16-17 instinct vs. intelligence 18-19 the child's memory 19-20 what a child remembers 20-22 why adults misunderstand children 22-23 practical suggestions 23-24 impressing commands 24-25 treatment of a bad memory 25-26 the primary sense 26-29 how the city interferes with development 29-31 . 280 INDEX self-helpfulness 31-33 the role of play 33-34 training in concentration 34-35 Intelligence, first signs of 13-14 degree of at different ages 16-17 vs. instinct 18-19 Imitation, in the child's play activities 227-228 Kindergarten Methods, in the home 244-245 first requirement 245-246 the ball as used in the kindergarten 246-247 "gifts" 247-248 peg-board 248-249 Language Training, first steps in 155-186 voice play and learning to speak 155-156 the easier sounds are first made 156-157 "baby talk" 157-158 "baby talk" and speech defects 159-160 easy and difficult sounds 160-161 correcting errors in speech 161-163 learning the meanings of words 163-165 of supreme importance 165-167 helping the child to learn meanings 167-168 young children get their cues from facial expression. 168-169 single-word sentences 170-171 how sentences are built up 171-173 the use of gesture, etc 173-174 children can learn to speak only by speaking 174-175 difficult task to master languages 175-177 the child meets his chief difficulties in grammatical relations 177-180 individual differences in learning language 180-185 Leader, passion to be 151-154 Learning Language, individual differences in 180-185 Learning to Speak, and voice play 155-157 only by speaking 174-175 an exceedingly difficult task 175-180 difficulties in mastering grammatical relations 177-180 Long-range Commands 105-107 Make Believe, in the world of 260-264 child dramatizes life around him 262 the child's love of symbolism 262-264 Man, as the social animal 120-121 Meaning of Words, learning the 163-165 of supreme importance 165-166 helping the child 167 INDEX 281 Meat, in children's diet 46-47 Mechanical Toys, the value of 231-232 Memory, the child's 19-20 what a child remembers 20-22 misunderstanding children in regard to memory . . . 22-23 impressing commands so they will persist in memory 24-25 treatment of a defective memory 25-26 Military Schools, daily program in 84-85 Nagging, in ethical training 104-105 Neighbors, should not interfere when parents are train- ing their children 193-194 Nervous Children, helped in the kindergarten 250-252 need companionship 252-253 Nervous Strain, in the city 57 "Obstinacy," one cause of 98-100 Outdoor Habit 54-55 Over-eating 43-44 Over-excitement, children are subject to 55-56 city life over-excites children 56-57 reducing nervous strain in the city \ . 57-58 sleep as a restorer of nervous health ." 58-59 conditions that disturb sleep 59-60 Over-indulgence, the danger of 209-211 Parents, effect of disagreement between in ethical train- ing 107-109 who hector one another 139-140 "Parties," in social training 130-132 Passion, to win in contests 146-148 to win in argumentation 148-149 making good use of passion to win 150-151 to be a leader 151-154 Peg Board, as used in the kindergarten 248 Pets, value of in ethical training 113-115 Physical, vs. intellectual 70-71 Pioneer Life, in relation to the development of endur- ance 75-76 Play, the role of in development 33-34 Play Things (See Toys and Playthings). • Posture, as affected by development of the foot 62-63 Punishment, danger of too much 205-206 "Refined" Living, in relation to development of resist- ance 72-74 results of neglect or too great exposure 74-75 Regularity, in ethical training 83-85 Representation, materials needed for in child's play ... 229-230 282 INDEX Resistance, weakening by bad habits 66-69 Rhythm, in habits in relation to training disposition .. 190-191 Riding, the love of in childhood 230-231 Rivalry, in a family 136-137 Rod, classical writers advise against use of 197-198 Sand-pile, as source of enjoyment to the child 226-227 Sand-table (See Sand-pile). Schoolroom, training character in 112-113 Self-helpfulness, training for 31-33 play as favoring the development of 33-34 Sense Development, as handicapped in city life 29-31 Sense Hunger, in a child 14-15 Sentences, how built up 171-173 Serve, learning to, in ethical training 110-112 Single- word Sentences, first used by young children 170-171 Skating, the love of in childhood 230-231 Sleep, as a restorer of nervous health 58-59 conditions that disturb 59-60 Sliding, the love of In childhood 230-231 Social Animal, man as distinguished from other animals.120-121 Social Contact, hunger for, in the child's development. .132-133 Social Efficiency, the child must be trained in 122-123 Social Station, as a consideration in choosing com- panions 143-144 Social Training, first steps in 120-154 man as the social animal 120-121 solitary confinement 122 the child must be made socially efficient 122-123 social training should begin early 124-125 the chief need of the child 125-127 first fault to be avoided 127-128 harshness vs. indulgence in social training 128-129 second fault to be avoided 129-130 third fault to be avoided 130-132 hunger for social contact 132-133 "brotherly love" 133-136 rivalry in a family 136-137 a boy will not endure being "bossed" by a brother. .137-139 when parents hector one another 139-140 independence vs. captiousness 140-141 choosing companions 142-143 neither wealth nor social station is considered in choosing companions 143-144 adults as companions of the young 144-146 the child's passion to win in arguments 148-149 contest between parents and children 149-150 turning the passion to good use 150-151 the passion to be a leader 151-154 INDEX 283 Solitary Confinement, as the most acute form of punish- ment 122 Sounds, easy, first made in learning to speak 156-157 difficult 160-161 Speech, correcting errors in 161-163 Spoiled Child 211-213 Stimulating Beverages, in child's diet 48-49 Strangers, should let young children alone 189-190 Substitution, as a method of correcting faults 109-110 Sugar, in a child's diet 41-42 Symbolism, child's love of 262-264 Sympathy, in the child's social training 129-130 Talking, as a handicap in teaching when excessive 237-238 Tantrum, nipping In the bud 90-92 Teaching, example of defective 238-240 Tearing, in childhood 224-225 Teeth, bill-of-fare when teeth appear 39-41 Temperament, when formed 186-188 The Foot, importance in relation to health 61-62 Throwing, In childhood 225-226 "Tin Soldiers," in a boy's play 233-234 Touch, as the primary sense 26-28 Toys and Playthings 215-234 primary mental hungers 215-220 the drum and bells 220-222 the ball 222-223 breaking, tearing, throwing activities 223-226 a sand-pile or sand-table 226-227 the imitative impulse 227-228 building blocks 228-229 materials for representation 229-230 riding, sliding, skating 230-231 the value of mechanical tovs 231-232 the doll 232-233 tin soldiers for the boy 233-234 Training, intellectual 13-35 for self-helpfulness 31-33 in concentration 34-35 health 36-76 ethical 77-119 regularity In 183-185 in the schoolroom 112-113 social 120-154 language 155-156 disposition 186-214 Training Character, in schoolroom 112-113 284 INDEX Training Disposition, first steps in 186-214 when temperament is formed 186-188 the manner of holding an infant 188-189 strangers should let children alone. . . ." 189-190 rhythm in habits 190-191 the treatment of crying 191-193 neighbors should not interfere 193-194 habits cannot be broken suddenly 194-195 gentle measures in training disposition 195-196 abolition of corporal punishment 197 classical writers against use of rod 197-198 physical force in the home 201-205 danger of too much repression and punishment 205-206 ruining a child's disposition 206-208 "thorns in the flesh," 208-209 danger of over-indulgence 209-211 spoiled child 211-213 ruining disposition by too much attention 213-214 Voice Play, and learning to speak 155-157 Wealth, as a consideration in choosing companions 143-144 Win, child's passion to 146-148 in argumentation . : 148-149 contest between parents and children 149-150 turning the passion to good use 150-151 Words, must be used, not simply Ueard in learning the meaning of 167-168 gaining meaning from facial expression 168-169 Writing 253-260 big tools for small hands 255-256 conditions that prevent coordination 257-258 child should not be pushed in use of coordination. .258-260 RETURt TO—N LOAN F HOIV ALLB( 1y- SEP nE& Ui CIRCUL RETURN TO the circulation desk of any University of California Library or to the NORTHERN REGIONAL LIBRARY FACILITY BIdg. 400, Richmond Field Station University of California Richmond, CA 94804-4698 ALL BOOKS MAY BE RECALLED AFTER 7 DAYS ^-month loans may be renewed by callina (510)642-6753 ^TNRLr "^^^ ^^ recharged by bringing books Renewals and recharges may be made 4 days prior to due date ^ DUE AS STAMPED BELOW ^UG 1 8 2003 JANJ)91996 FORAA" 20,000 (4/94) GENERAL LIBRARY - U.C. 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