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 mssp^iBaiMSSiM 
 
 OF SEVERAL EMINENT 
 
 METHODIST PREACHERS. 
 
 WITH AX ACCOUNT OF 
 
 THEIR CALL TO AND SUCCESS IN THE MINISTRY. 
 
 IX A SERIES OF LETTEHS, 
 
 Written ftp €t)emjefett>e& 
 
 TO 
 
 JOHN WESLEY, A. M. 
 
 Baltimore, 
 
 PUBLISHED BY RICHARD J. MATCHETT, 
 
 N. E. Comer of Gay & Water Streets. 
 
 1821.
 
 FROM THE OLD EDITION. 
 
 THE lives of good men, when justly set forth, have 
 ever been esteemed by the truly wise, as a most valu- 
 able treasure. They, as a cloud of witnesses, bear their 
 testimony in favour of godliness, and greatly encourage 
 mankind to imitate their pious examples. Nevertheless, 
 biographers have generally been looked upon as a set of 
 writers, who are not very scrupulous respecting the truth; 
 hence they have frequently been despised by men of dis- 
 cernment, and their writing but little regarded. There 
 can, however, be no such objection brought against the 
 following Narratives: for they were written by the per- 
 sons themselves, who are men of the greatest probity, and 
 still in being. This being the case, they might easily be 
 detected, if any thing contrary to truth were found in 
 their writings. 
 
 Moreover, the facts mentioned in the accounts they 
 have given of themselves, were many of them transacted 
 in public, and there are multitudes ol persons, both 
 friends and enemies to the preachers, who can witness 
 the truth of what they declare. 
 
 But what will principally recommend them to all lo- 
 vers of pure and undefiled religion is, that they contain a 
 more rational and scriptural account of Christian Ex- 
 perience, thau any yet offered to the Fublic. 

 
 A SHOUT ACCOUNT 
 
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 TO THE REV. JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 Rev. Sir, 
 
 I was born at Thorner, near Leeds, in York- 
 shire, in the year 1737. My parents were repu • 
 table people, belonging to the church of England, 
 and, though strangers to the life and power of re- 
 - 1 ligion, would not suffer me to run headlong into 
 the vices of the age, but brought me up in the 
 ^ fear of God, and gave me, according to their abi- 
 w lity, a good education. My father being in the 
 f§ building business, brought me up in the same 
 wav; on which I entered in the fifteenth year 
 of my age. 
 3 At this time I was serious, and had no desire 
 £ to follow the multitude to do evil. I attended 
 p the service of the church constantly, and met in 
 a small sociaty of church people, belonging to the 
 2 High-church in Hull, where I lived with my bro- 
 ther-in-law. Whether these were acquainted with 
 the power of religion I know not, as I was, at 
 that time, an entire stranger to it myself; yet I 
 did not doubt but all was well with me, and 
 thought if I died I should certainly be happy with 
 God. 
 
 About the year 1755, 1 fell in company with two 
 persons who talked much concerning the people
 
 EXPERIENOK OF 
 
 called Methodists. I had then an hatred against 
 them above all others, supposing them to be a 
 weak and wicked people. I condemned them 
 altogether; and had no desire either to hear them 
 preach or to read any of their writings. But from 
 the account that one of them gave of his wife, who 
 was a Methodist, I began to have a more favorable 
 opinion of them; and thought I should be glad to 
 hear them. Accordingly, I went one evening 
 with an intention to hear; but when I came to the 
 door I was ashamed to go in, and so walked round 
 the preaching -house, and returned home. 
 
 About the year 1756, I began to follow my bu- 
 siness at Harewood-house, the seat of Edwin Las- 
 celles, Esq. Here I fell in with a company of ve- 
 ry wicked young men; and.though I was preserv- 
 ed from following them into gross sin, yet I was 
 now a greater enemy to the Methodists than ever. 
 But about the year 1758, a young women, who 
 was a Methodist, lent my father two sermons, 
 preached at the parish church in Leeds, by the rev. 
 Mr. Henry Crooks, of Hunslet. He read them, 
 and recommended them to me. In reading these, 
 I began to see that I was not in a state of salvation. 
 I saw first, that justification by faith was the doc- 
 trine ofthe church of England; and secondly, that 
 the scripture teaches it as necessary to salvation. 
 I also saw that the Methodists were the people of 
 God, and that they preached no other doctrine 
 than that which I found, even in my prayer book. 
 
 I now began to spend my leisure hours in read- 
 ing such books as treat on that subject* and was 
 astonished that I could not see these things before. 
 In the latter c\u\ of June, I went to Otly, to hear 
 a Methodist preach, when I was more surprised
 
 MR. JOHW PAW30N-. 
 
 than ever. The serious, devout behaviour of the 
 people, struck me with a kind of religious awe. 
 The singing greatly delighted me, and the ser- 
 mon was much blest to my soul. They suffered 
 me to stay in the society -meeting, for which I had 
 great cause to bless God. I returned home full 
 of good resolutions; but little thought what trials 
 were coming upon me. I thought, certainly none 
 who love me can be offended at my seeking the sal- 
 vation of my soul: but I soon found my mistake; 
 for those who had formerly been my greatest 
 friends, now became my open enemies. All my 
 relations were exceedingly offended, and threaten- 
 ed me much, if I would not leave this way. My 
 uncle in particular, who before promised to be 
 kind to me, now resolved to leave me nothing; 
 which resolution he made good. My father and 
 mother were exceedingly troubled, supposing me 
 to be totally ruined; and my brothers and sisters 
 were of the same mind; my father threatened ma- 
 ny times to turn me out of doors, and entirely to 
 disown me; but the love he had for me (I being 
 his eldest son) moved him to use every means he 
 could think of, to prevail on me to forsake this 
 despised people, whom he hated above all others: 
 he mourned to see me "run wilfully to my own 
 ruin." My mother also frequently wept much 
 on my account. 
 
 This was indeed a time of great trial to me. 
 My father's threatening to disinherit me, did not 
 trouble me at all; but the consideration of the dan- 
 ger their souls were in, distressed me exceeding- 
 ly. I therefore did not regard what I suffered, 
 so my parents might be brought out of their Egyp* 
 tian darkness. To this end, I bought the best 
 
 1*
 
 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 books I could meet with; some of which my father 
 read, but it seemed, to no good purpose. 
 
 About this time my brother was awakened, 
 and also my younger sister's husband. My el- 
 dest sister and her husband likewise began to have 
 a favourable opinion of this way. This made my 
 father more severe with me, supposing I was the 
 occasion of all this mischief. For the present he 
 prevailed on my brother to hear this preaching 
 no more. However, it was not long before he 
 set out in the way of salvation. My father, when 
 he saw he was so far from gaining ground, that he 
 was continually losing it, grew exceeding uneasy, 
 and knew not what course to take. However, he 
 now entered upon a new scheme: he began to be 
 mild and gentle, and to use soft words. He told 
 me, I might buy what books I pleased; only I 
 must not go to hear the preaching. I might 
 learn as much, if not more, by reading Mr. Wes 
 ley's writings than by hearing the lay-preachers. 
 He said the Methodists being a people so univer- 
 sally hated, it would ruin my character to go 
 among them. 
 
 I now found it hard work to withstand my fa- 
 ther's good nature. Accordingly, preaching be- 
 ing one sabbath-day near our house, I could not 
 break through. When it was over, I walked into 
 the garden, and wept bitterly. From thence I 
 went into a solitary place, where no one might see 
 me, and bemoaned myself before the Lord. Oh, 
 the anguish I then felt ! I was scarcely able to look 
 up. My father soon found me, and took me into 
 the fields to see the grass and corn. But this 
 could afford me no relief; he was greatly troubled 
 on my account, supposing that I should run dis-
 
 MR. JOHN 1'AWSON. 
 
 tracted. We returned home in time to attend 
 the service of the church: and in the evening, ac- 
 cording to our custom, we read in our own house; 
 when 1 hud done reading, my father seemed to 
 approve of what I read. I Mas glad, and began 
 to speak to him in as mild a manner as I could,- 
 but he was soon much offended, and said, "I find 
 "thou art now entirely ruined. I have used eve- 
 "ry means I can think of, but all to no purpose. 
 u I rejoiced at thy birth, and I once thought thou 
 "was as hopeful a young manasany in this town; 
 ' 'but now I shall have no more comfort in thee, so 
 "long as I live. Thy mother and I are now 
 "grown old, and thou makest our lives quite mis- 
 erable: thou wilt bring down our gray hairs 
 "with sorrow to the grave; thou- intendest to 
 "make my house a preaching-house, When once 
 "my head is laid; but I shall take care it shall 
 "never be thine. No; I will leave all I have to 
 "the poor of the parish, before the Methodists 
 "shall have any thing to do with it." 
 
 I was exceedingly affected while he spoke in 
 this manner. He then desired me to promise I 
 would hear this preaching no more. I told him 
 (when I could speak for weeping) that if I could 
 see a sufficient reason, I would make him that 
 promise; but not till then. He replied, "Well, 
 "I see thou art quite stupid: I may as well say 
 "nothing: the Methodists are the most bewitch- 
 "ing people that ever lived; for when once a per- 
 son hears them, it is impossible to persuade them 
 "to return back again. " I then left him, and went 
 to bed; but my trouble was very great. I was 
 tempted to think that I was disobedient to my 
 parents; but I clearly saw that I must obey God
 
 KXPERIENCE OF 
 
 rather than man; and that I must obey them only, 
 so far as was consistent with his will. 
 
 My brother and I now began to take sweet coun- 
 sel together: and we strove to oblige our parents 
 with all our might; taking particular care that no 
 business was neglected on account of our going 
 to hear preaching. We frequently prayed toge- 
 ther in our bed chamber, and several times my 
 mother got upon the stairs to hearken: at last she 
 desired to join in prayer with us. Afterwards my 
 father listened upon the stairs, and after some 
 time, he also desired to join with us. 
 
 The minister of the parish now began to be ap- 
 prehensive that he should lose my father, and with 
 him the whole family. In order to prevent this, 
 he carefully gathered all the false accusations he 
 could hear of against the people, and brought 
 them to my father. He laboured with all his 
 might, both in public and private, to make them 
 appear detestable; by so doing, he created me 
 much trouble. I told my father that these things 
 were entirely false: but he was so provoked, that I 
 thought he would make good his former resolution 
 of quite disowning me. However, I thought I 
 would write to him my whole mind: accordingly, 
 I began by shewing him the wretched state of my 
 soul? and the danger I apprehended to be continu* 
 allv hanging over my head. I then expostulated 
 with him, and asked, "What worse am I in any 
 "respect, since I heard the Methodists? am I diso- 
 bedient to you or my mother in any other thing? 
 "Do I neglect any part of my business? Must not 
 "every one be accountable to God for himself? 
 * t Doth our law condemn any man before it hears 
 "him and knows what he doth? Why then do you
 
 MR. JOHN PAWSON. 
 
 •'condemn the Methodist preachers whom you 
 <l have never heard? If you will hear them only 
 "three times, and then prove from the Scripture 
 "that they preach contrary thereunto, I will hear 
 "them no more." My father read this letter, ac- 
 cepted of the proposals, and accordingly went to 
 hear. He seemed to like the first tolerably well; 
 the second he did not like at all; the third he ap- 
 proved of very much, and went to hear a fourth, 
 which he liked better than all the rest: yet he was 
 not convinced. However, he now began to pray, 
 that the Lord would shew him the way of salva- 
 tion. A little after he went, on a Sabbath morn- 
 ing, into the stable, where he thought no body 
 could hear or see him, and prayed earnestly to the 
 Lord. Here it was that the light of the Holy Spi- 
 rit broke in upon him: he now had a clear sight of 
 his sinful and lost condition, and was brought in- 
 to such distress, that, like David, he roared for 
 the very disquietness of his soul. He was now 
 ashamed and confounded, and could hardly hope 
 for mercy. This was a day of glad tidings to me: 
 a day which I trust I shall thankfully remember 
 as Ions: as I live. I now had liberty to cast in mv 
 lot with the people of God, which I immediately 
 did. My father also invited the preachers to his 
 house. Accordingly, he prevented my turning 
 it into a preaching-house fas he had formerly said ) 
 by doing it himself. From this time we had 
 preaching in our own house, and all the family 
 (which were eight in number) joined the society: 
 this was about January, 1760. 
 
 For some time, though I knew myself to be 
 without God in the world, I was dull and unaffect- 
 ed and often applied these words to myself,
 
 10 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 "Still every means in vain I try, 
 
 "I seek him far and near; 
 '•Where'er I come, constraint to cry, 
 
 "My Sariour is not here. 
 
 "God is in this, in every place, 
 
 "Yet 0, how dark and void! 
 "To me 'tis one great wilderness, 
 
 "This earth without my God." 
 
 About this time the Lord began to revive his 
 work among us: my father having received the 
 preaching into his house, many of our neigh- 
 bours came to hear; our society also increased, 
 which was matter of great joy to me; but it was 
 my continual prayer, that the Lord would take 
 away my heart of stone, and give me a heart of 
 flesh. I cried day and night unto him, that he 
 would give me a broken and a contrite heart, and 
 it was not long ere he inclined his ear. I went 
 to hear the word at a neighbouring village, when, 
 in the beginning of the service, the power of God 
 came mightily) upon me and many others. All 
 on a sudden my heart was like melting wax, my 
 soul was distressed above measure. I cried aloud 
 with an exceeding bitter cry; the trouble and an- 
 guish of spirit that I laboured under, far exceed- 
 ing all description. The arrows of the Almighty 
 stuck fast in my flesh, and the poison of them 
 drank up my spirits; yet in the height of my dis- 
 tress I could bless the Lord; that he had granted 
 me that which I had so long sought for. I now 
 sought the Lord with, mij whole heart, and ne- 
 glected no opportunity of hearing his word, or of 
 waiting upon him in every means of grace ; yet 
 many times I did not hear one half of the sermon, 
 my distress being so exceeding great. I had 
 such a clear sight and deep sense of my exceed-
 
 MR. JOHN PAWSON. 11 
 
 ing sinfulness, that I was humbled in the dust. 
 I daily walked mournfully before the Lcrd. 
 The things of this world were made quite bitter 
 to me: I could take no delight in any of them, 
 my mind being so occupied with grief for my 
 past sins, and with desire to be delivered from 
 them. My business became a burden to me: I 
 was quite confused, and brought very low; so that 
 any one, who looked on me, might see in my 
 countenance the distress of my mind: for I was 
 on the very brink of despair. 
 
 One morning as I walked in the fields, be- 
 moaning myself like Ephraim of old, my heart 
 sunk within me like a stone, and I was about to 
 conclude that it was all in vain for me to expect 
 any mercy. But the Lord would not suffer the 
 Spirit to fail before him, and the soul which he 
 had made. He revived my drooping heart with 
 that comfortable word, "O tarry thou the Lord's 
 "leisure: be strong, and he shall comfort thine 
 heart. " I was now, for a season, enabled both to 
 hope and quietly to wait for the salvation of God, 
 
 About this time one of my acqaintance was 
 brought to enjoy a clear sense of the love of God, 
 when he had only heard about three sermons. 
 This utterly confounded me: I could in no wise 
 account for it. I did not consider, that one day 
 with the Lord is as a thousand years. I thought 
 he was deceived, and that it was impossible he 
 should be converted so soon; but the next morn- 
 ing the preacher gave public thanks to God on 
 his account. I was then constrained to believe 
 all was well with him. I returned home, and im- 
 mediately retired into my chamber; but here I 
 had not sufficient opportunity to give vent to my
 
 1>2 experience of 
 
 grief: I therefore walked into the barn, where I 
 thought no one could see or hear me. Here I 
 prayed, and wept, and roared aloud, my distress 
 being greater then I was well able to bear: yet I 
 was not quite without hope, but expected, vile as 
 I was, that the Lord would at last be gracious 
 unto me. But I was not so private as I supposed; 
 for I found my brother was in another part of the 
 barn, in as great distress as myself; and my father 
 and mother soon heard our cries, and came to 
 us, and in a little time my eldest sister and her 
 husband. We were now six in number, and all 
 in the same distress. I suppose, if some of the, 
 good Christians of the age had either seen or heard 
 us, they would have concluded we were all quite 
 beside ourselves. However, though the children 
 were brought to the birth, there was not strength 
 to bring forth. I continued destitute of comfort, 
 but stedfastly purposed to abide as at the door of 
 mercy. 
 
 One Saturday evening I went to a little village 
 to hear preaching; and it being a new place, abun- 
 dance of people gathered together. The power 
 of God so accompanied the word that many be- 
 gan to tremble. There was a mighty shaking 
 among the dry bones, and the power of ihe Lord 
 was not only present to wound, but to heal also; 
 for this night my father found redemption in the 
 blood of Jesus, and the preacher gave public 
 thanks on his account. — When I heard that my 
 father had obtained mercy, I was so far from be- 
 ing nble to rejoice with him that my soul sunk 
 as into the belly of hell I heard very little of the 
 sermon, but continued kneeling all the time of 
 service; and after it was ended, I still continued
 
 MH. JOHN VAWSON 13 
 
 trembling, weeping, and crying aloud for mercy. 
 I returned home as well as I was able, for my 
 bodily strength was quite exhausted. "My head 
 was as the waters, and mine eyes became as a 
 fountain of tears." 1 was truly willing to be saved 
 by grace. I was naked, and stripped of all. I 
 had nothing of my own to depend upon for life 
 and salvation. I had nothing to pay; no money or 
 price to bring with me to procure the favour of 
 God, 
 
 1 passed this night in sorrow and great heavi- 
 ness, and was glad when the day returned. It 
 was the Lord's day, and the preacher intended to 
 meet our society, in order to wrestle with God 
 in behalf of those who were in distress. I went 
 with a heart full of sorrow, panting after the Lord 
 as the hart after the water brooks. The service 
 began, and the power of God was present in a 
 wonderful manner; when prayer was made in be- 
 half of those who were in distress, I was bowed 
 upon my knees in the middle of the room, and, 
 if possible, was in greater anguish of spirit than 
 ever before. I heard one, whose voice I knew, 
 cry for mercy with all his might, as if he would 
 rend the very heavens. Quickly after, in the 
 twinkling of an eye, all my trouble was gone, my 
 guilt and condemnation were removed, Iivas filed 
 with joy unspeakable . I knew by experience, that 
 the Lord was merciful to my unrighteousness, and 
 remembered my sin no more. That lovt of God 
 was shed abroad in my heart. I loved him from 
 an experimental sense of his love tome. Ohow 
 my soul triumphed in the God of my salvation! 
 This glorious deliverance was wrought by his Holy 
 Spirit applying these words ' ' Thou art mine 1 ' some 
 2
 
 14 -. EXPERIENCE O* 
 
 time after, my brother told me the words were 
 in the prophecy of Isaiah: I rose early in the 
 morning and took my Bible, which I opened at 
 random, and they were the first words I cast my 
 eyes upon! Isaiah xliii. 1. This was a kind of 
 renewal of the promise of God to me, and I was 
 enabled to praise him the more. 
 
 The day upon which the Lord brought my soul 
 out of prison, was sabbath, the 6th of March, 
 1760, which, I trust, I shall thankfully remem- 
 ber so long as I live. The change passed upon 
 my soul was exceeding great. I was brought 
 out of darkness into marvellous light— out of mi- 
 serable bondage into glorious liberty — and out 
 of the most bitter distress into unspeakable happi- 
 ness! I had not the least doubt of my acceptance 
 with God: but was fully assured, that he was re- 
 conciled to me through the merits of his Son, who 
 was now unspeakably precious to my soul. I 
 was also fully satisfied, that I was born o/^God, 
 or renewed in the spirit of my mind, and I could 
 heartily praise the Lord that he had taken that se- 
 vere method in bringing me home to himself. 
 For by this means, my justification was so clear 
 to me that I could neither doubt nor fear: the work 
 of the spirit of God, in renewing my soul, was 
 also the more conspicuous: and this caused me to 
 prize the liberty into which I was brought, and 
 made me more afraid of being entangled again 
 with the yoke of bondage. I now walked com- 
 fortably with God, enjoying sweet communion 
 with him. I could both do and suffer his will 
 with all cheerfulness. Yet satan soon began to 
 assault me, and laboured to perplex me with evil 
 reasoning; telling me, I should not always have so
 
 MR. JOHN PAW30N. 15 
 
 great a value for God, or for spiritual things, as 
 I now had: but as I was happy for the present, 
 I did not regard all he could say, knowing that 
 I had nothing to do with hereafter. / had only 
 to lite by the faith of the Son of God, who now 
 appeared as altogether lovely. 
 
 About six weeks after, the preacher proposed 
 dividing our little society into two classes, and de- 
 sired me to meet one of them. This was a sore 
 trial to me; but when he insisted on my doing it, 
 I was obliged to take up the cross. From 
 the first or second time I met it, / continual' 
 ly walked in the light of God's countenance; no 
 creature shared my affections with God; but 1 serv- 
 ed him with an undivided heart. I had no dis- 
 tressing temptation, but had constant power over 
 all sin; so that 1 lived as upon the borders of hea- 
 ven. 
 
 About this time, my eldest sister, and my 
 younger sister's husband were brought into the 
 Christian liberty; and a little after, my mother and 
 vounger sister. This gave me fresh cause to 
 bless the Lord for his goodness. 
 
 December 28, 1 760, the Lord spoke peace to 
 my brother, while I was praying with him. Now 
 I had more cause to praise the Lord than before. 
 My brother had laboured for a whole year in sore 
 distress of mind, and was many times brought 
 to the brink of despair. I do not remember to 
 have seen any one in the like circumstances for so 
 long a time. But God broke all his bonds asun- 
 der, and caused him to walk in the light of his 
 countenance. 
 
 We now began to have a public meeting for 
 praying every sabbath evening, but had no person
 
 16 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 among us who could give a word of exhortation. 
 This troubled me much; for I was afraid the peo- 
 ple would grow weary of coming together, if we 
 continued only to sing and pray, as they were 
 obliged to stand or kneel all the time. I thought 
 it would be much better to read a sermon to them, 
 that they might sit down a little. Accordingly, 
 I got the homilies of the church, which were en 
 tirely new to the people. These I read, and, as 
 I was able, explained; in doing which, I found 
 great liberty. This proved a blessing to many. 
 But the minister of the parish (being an open en- 
 emy to all that is good) began to be offended, 
 and laboured to prejudice the people against me. 
 He seemed not to regard what he said either in 
 public or private, if by any means he could turn 
 the people aside. But they did not regard him: 
 nay, the more he said, the worse they liked him, 
 so that when he saw he could prevail nothing, he 
 determined to leave the town, which in a little 
 time he accordingly did. When I had read the 
 most profitable of the homilies, I took Mr Burk- 
 itt on the New Testament, and read many parti- 
 cular passages therein, and enlarged where I 
 thought it needful. 
 
 After this, I began to take the Bible itself, and 
 in my poor manner, expounded part of a chapter 
 from time to time: and notwithstanding my insuf- 
 ficiency, much good was done. But this expos- 
 ed me to fresh trials: the people from the neigh- 
 bouring societies began to invite me to go and 
 give them a word of exhortation; but, as I well 
 knew my own weakness, I absolutely refused. 
 But the assistant prevailed on me to go to a neigh- 
 bouring town on a Sunday evening. The peo-
 
 MR. JOHN PAWSON. 17 
 
 pie, whether I would or not, thrust me into the 
 pulpit. I trembled exceedingly.- however, I 
 spoke as well as I could, and the same evening re- 
 turned home, greatly ashamed of what I had said. 
 I was in hopes they would trouble me no more, 
 but so far was I deceived in this, that about lady- 
 day, 1762, the assistant employed me among the 
 local preachers. I now knew not what course to 
 take, yet I durst not decline the work. Howe- 
 ver, I was almost determined to remove into 
 some distant part of the country, but the love I 
 had for the society to which I belonged, would 
 not suffer me. I was, therefore, obliged to do 
 what I could, and I found God was with me. 
 
 In August following, the conference was at 
 Leeds, and the assistant desired me to attend, I 
 took up my cross and went. Several young men 
 were proposed as candidatesfor travelling preach- 
 ers, and I among the rest. When you, sir, ask- 
 ed me if I was willing to give up myself to the 
 work, I told you I was conscious of my inability, 
 but if you and the brethren thought good to make 
 trial of me, I should deliver myself up to you. 
 Accordingly, I was ordered for the York circuit. 
 When I was gone, God raised up my brother to 
 take my place, who was soon as well beloved by 
 the people as I had been. I had till now met a 
 few people in Hare wood, where I had followed 
 my business. I had suffered much in my mind 
 on their account, as I had no hope of any settled 
 preaching there. As all the town belonged to 
 one gentleman, I thought he would never suffer 
 it, and as no one could receive the preachers 
 without his consent, my labour would be in vain. 
 The few people here were also much cast down, 
 2*
 
 18 EX^EHIENGE OF 
 
 when they heard I was going to leave them. But 
 after my removal, I was invited to preach among 
 them, which I accordingly did, to a multitude 
 who came together, and from that time they have 
 had the gospel preached among them, and, to 
 the great surprise of many, without any of that 
 • opposition they so much expected. 
 
 I now entered upon my circuit Here the as- 
 sistant behaved to me with all the tenderness of a 
 parent, aud the other preachers acted, in their 
 places, in like manner: the people not only bore 
 with my weakness, but seemed glad to see me 
 wherever I came; and I often found myself un- 
 speakably blest in speaking to them. I desired 
 nothing more than to glorify God with my body 
 and spirit, which I knew he had redeemed. Yet 
 I met with many trials from various quarters. 
 And in many places the press-gangs attended our 
 preaching, and threatened what they would do; 
 but the Lord restrained them. In other places 
 we had much persecution, especially in Beverly, 
 where the magistrates absolutely refusing to do 
 us justice, we seldom could preach with any de- 
 gree of satisfaction to ourselves, or those who de- 
 sired to hear us. When we complained against 
 three young men who disturbed us much, and 
 they were brought before uhe mayor and alder 
 men, they said the information was insufficient, 
 being only signed by myself. The mayor then 
 insisted, that I had been examined upon oath be- 
 fore him, and that having sworn to men that I did 
 not know, he would indict me for perjury, and 
 send me to York Castle. When they would per- 
 mit me to speak, I told them, that I was so far 
 from having taken a false oath, that I had taken
 
 Mil. JOHN BAWSOHi 19 
 
 no oath at all; that there were now present three 
 very sufficient witnesses, who would all make 
 oath, if it was required, that neither I nor say 
 other person had taken any oath on the occasion. 
 When they heard this they began to be a little 
 more calm; but as they were determined to do us 
 no justice, we quietly withdrew. However, the 
 work of God prospered much in those parts this 
 year; many joined the society, and many found 
 redemption in the blood ol Jesus. 
 
 The next year I and three others were order- 
 ed into the Haworth circuit. We found the 
 people in those parts in a very languishing con- 
 dition. There seemed an universal mourning 
 for the loss of that eminent servant of God, Mr. 
 Grimshaw, who died the year before. Many 
 said, farewell to all prosperity in these parts; the 
 work of God will come to nothing. But, to our 
 unspeakable comfort, there was a blessed revival; 
 the society was exceedingly quickened and en- 
 larged; and it was thought there was more good 
 done in this one year, than in four years put to- 
 gether before. 
 
 In August, 1764, 1 was ordered for Norwich. 
 Fere the congregations were in general very 
 i.rge, while our society increased considerably. 
 But during the winter we had almost continual 
 mobbing. The rioters frequently broke the 
 windows, interrupted us in preaching, and abused 
 the people when service was ended- We made 
 complaint to the mayor, but he would not do us 
 justice; encouraged the rioters, and led them to 
 commit still greater outrages. 
 
 I was now removed to Colchester for a season, 
 when preaching had just began in a plane about
 
 28 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 six miles from it. Here they did not treat us in 
 a friendly manner: the mob, being encouraged 
 by the church wardens, were exceeding violent. 
 They assembled in great numbers before the 
 house, having got a drum and a large quantity of 
 horns, with which they made such a prodigious 
 noise, that the people could not hear. Meantime, 
 the constable and church wardens came into the 
 house, and asked me if I would go with them to 
 the quarter sessions the next day. I told them 
 I would. They said, then we need not shew you 
 the justice's order. I then desired our friends 
 to bring my horse. They said you had better 
 walk to the end of the town. I did so; the mob 
 gave me a free passage, but followed me, beating 
 the drum, soundingtheir horns, and shouting with 
 all their might. I walked slowly down the street 
 before them, in great peace and tranquility of 
 mind. When we came to the town, I stopped 
 till my horse came. They now encompassed me 
 on every side, yet none of them struck me, or so 
 much as cast any dirt or stones at me, although 
 1 had no man with me. But after I was gone, 
 they abused the poor people who had come from 
 Colchester with me, very much. 
 
 The next day I appeared at the sessions. The 
 principal justice was a clergyman belonging to 
 the cathedral in Canterbury, a very candid, sensi- 
 ble gentleman. He said he would not have me 
 think he had sent for me by way of persecution; 
 but as complaint had been made to him by the 
 church wardens, and others of the inhabitants of 
 Nayland, that certain strangers, who acted in the 
 capacity of preachers, had come at unseasonable 
 hours in the night, and made very great disturb-
 
 MR. JOHN PAWSOX. 21 
 
 ances in the town, he, as one of his Majesty's 
 justices of the peace, was obliged to enquire into 
 it, and therefore required me to answer 10 certain 
 questions drawn up in writing. He read the ques- 
 tions, and I answered them, so that he was quite 
 satisfied, and promised, that we should have peace 
 for the time to come; but hoped we would for- 
 give all that was past. 
 
 In a little time I returned to Norwich, where I 
 spent the remaining part of the year in great peace. 
 We were obliged to preach in the open air all that 
 summer. We had also a good prospect of a re- 
 vival of the work of God in Yarmouth, having 
 procured a convenient chapel, which had been 
 built for the Anabaptists. We had abundance 
 to hear from time to time, and much good was 
 likely to have been done: but one of our leaders 
 turning Calvinist, sowed such discord among the 
 society, that nothing but confusion followed: the 
 people scattered so effectually, that the wound 
 then given could never be healed. 
 
 From hence I went to Birstal, in Yorkshire, 
 and spent a year with much satisfaction, my own 
 soul being frequently comforted, while the work 
 of God in a good measure revived. 
 
 The two following years I spent in Lancashire. 
 The first of which was exceeding agreeable: only 
 the death of mv dear fellow labourer, Paul Green- 
 wood, exceedingly affected me. On the one hand 
 I mightily rejoiced that so dear a servant of God 
 was taken to his reward; and on the other, I 
 mourned bitterly at the loss of so dear a friend- 
 The last year I spent in these parts was a time of 
 great trial on various accounts.
 
 22 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 From Lancashire I went to Staffordshire, and 
 staid only one year. But I had the satisfaction 
 to see the work of God greatly revive; many new 
 societies were raised, and a considerable number 
 of the old ones were quickened and established. 
 
 The two following years I spent in London, 
 with some degree of satisfaction both to myself 
 and others; but cannot say much concerning the 
 success of my labours here. 
 
 From London I went to Bristol, where I con- 
 tinued three years. I have reason to bless God, 
 that my poor labours were acceptable, and, I 
 hope, in some measure, useful to the people. 
 
 The four following years I spent about Leeds 
 and Birstal, in Yorkshire. In the latter of these, 
 there was a very great revival of religion. Hun- 
 dreds of sinners were awakened, and turned from 
 the evil of their ways; and many received a com- 
 fortable assurance of the favour of God. 
 
 From Yorkshire I am again returned to Lon- 
 don. What successes, trials, or comforts I may 
 meet with, I know not; but I am still determined 
 to continue at my master's feet, that he may ful- 
 fil in me all the good pleasure of his goodness, 
 and the work of faith with power. 
 
 With regard to the Arminian controversy, al- 
 though I have frequently heard the Calvinists 
 preach, and also read many of their writings, yet 
 1 never had the least doubt of Christ's tasting 
 death for every man, or of his willingness to save 
 to the uttermost, all who come unto God through 
 
 him. 
 
 I am, Rev. Sir, Yours, &c. 
 
 JOHN PAWSON.
 
 A SHORT ACCOUNT 
 or 
 
 TO THE REV. MR. JOHN WESLEY, 
 REV. SIR, 
 
 I WAS born at Shasisbury, Dorsetshire, in 
 1710, my father followed gardening, and brought 
 me up to the same employment for several years; 
 but I did not like it, and longed for some busi- 
 ness that would allow me more liberty. In the* 
 mean time, I was very undutiful to my parents, 
 and much given to cursing, swearing, lying, and 
 sabbath-breaking. — But I was not easy in this 
 way, being often afraid, that the devil would car- 
 ry me away. 
 
 I was then placed with my uncle to learn to 
 make buttons. I liked this well at first, but was 
 soon tired of it. However, 1 staid out the year. 
 But my uncle then removing to Blandford, 1 
 was out of business. I wrought in many places, 
 but staid in none, being like a troubled sea, that 
 cannot rest. After some time, I went to my un- 
 cle at Blandford, and wrought with him about 
 a quarter of a year. But still I found no satisfac- 
 tion in any thing, neither in working, eating, 
 drinking, nor even in sleeping, though neither I 
 myself, nor any of my acquaintance could ima- 
 gine what was the matter with me. 
 
 Some time after, as I was working alone, the
 
 £4 EXPERIENCE 01 
 
 devil broke in upon me, with reasonings concern- 
 ing the being of a God till my senses were almost 
 gone. He then so strongly tempted me to blas- 
 pheme God, that I could not withstand. He 
 then told me "Thou art inevitably damned." 
 And I already believed him. For I thought, 
 though I have not cursed God outwardly, yet he 
 looketh to the heart. This consideration made 
 me sink into despair, as a stone into the mighty 
 waters. 
 
 I now began to wander about by the river side, 
 and through the woods and solitary places, many 
 times looking up to heaven with a heart ready to 
 break, thinking I had no part there. I thought 
 # every one happy but myself: the devil continual- 
 ly telling me, there was no mercy for me. Yet 
 I thought it was hard to be banished forever from 
 the presence of a merciful God, I cried to him 
 for help, but I found no relief; it seemed to be 
 all in vain. So I said like the men of Judah, 
 There is no hope; and then gave the reins to my 
 evil desires; not caring which end went foremost, 
 but giving myself up again to wicked company, 
 and all their evil ways. 
 
 If at any time I grew uneasy again, I stifled it 
 by drinking, swearing, card playing, lewdness, 
 and the like works of darkness, which I then pur- 
 sued with all greediness. And I was hastening 
 on when the great tremendous God met me as a 
 lion in the way, and his holy spirit whom I had 
 been so long grieving returned with greater force 
 than ever. I had no rest day nor night. I was 
 afraid to go to bed, lest the devil should carry me 
 away before morning. I was afraid to shut my 
 eyes, lest I should awake in helL I was terrified
 
 MR. JOHN HAIME. £J 
 
 when asleep; sometimes dreaming that many de- 
 vils were in the room, ready to take me away; 
 sometimes that the world was at an end, and I 
 was not ready to appear before the Judge of quick 
 and dead. At other times I thought I saw the 
 world on fire, and the wicked left to burn there- 
 in, with myself among them, and when I awoke 
 my senses were almost gone. 
 
 I was often on the point of destroying myself, 
 and was stopped 1 know not how. Then did I 
 weep bitterly: I moaned like a dove, I chattered 
 like a swallow. But I thought, though my an- 
 guish is very great, it is not like those who are 
 lifting up their eyes in torments. Then for a few 
 moments, I felt thankfulness to God. But still 
 the thoughts of death and judgment followed me 
 close for upwards of two years, till my bodily 
 strength was gone. Returning home one day, 
 and sitting down in a chair, my mother obser- 
 ving my pale look and low voice, asked "What is 
 Ihe matter with you?" But I durst not tell her: 
 so I turned it off. 
 
 One night, as I was going to bed, I durst not 
 lie down without pra)er. So falling upon my 
 knees I began to consider, "What can I pray 
 for? I have neither the will nor the power to do 
 any thing good." Then it darted into my mind- 
 "I will not pray; neither will I be beholden to 
 God for mercy." I arose from my knees, with 
 out prayer, and laid me down, but in no peace. 
 I never hid such a night before. I was as if my 
 very body had been in a fire, and I had a hell in 
 my conscience. I was thoroughly persuaded 
 the Devil was in the room, and I fully expected 
 every moment, that he would be let loose upon 
 
 3
 
 26- EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 me. I judged myself to be one of the worst 
 ereatures that God ever made. I thought I had 
 sinned beyond the reach of mercy: Yet all this 
 time I kept to the church, though I was often 
 afraid to go, lest the church or the tower should 
 fall upon me. 
 
 In spring, I was employed by a tanner, to go 
 with his carriage, and fetch dried bark. As I was 
 returning by myself, I was violently tempted to 
 blaspheme, yea, and hate God, till at length hav- 
 ing a stick in my hand, I threw it towards hea- 
 ven against God, with the utmost enmity.- Im- 
 mediately I saw in the clear element, a creature 
 like a swan, but much larger, part black, part 
 brown. It flew at me, and went just over my 
 head- Then it went about forty yards, lighted on 
 the ground and stood staring upon me. This 
 was in a clear day, about twelve o'clock, I strove 
 to pray, but could not. At length God opened 
 my mouth. I hastened home, praying all the 
 way, and earnestly resolving to sin no more. 
 But soon forgot my resolution, and multiplied 
 my sins, as the sands on the sea-shore. 
 
 To complete all, I enlisted myself for a soldier, 
 in the queen's regiment of dragoons. When we 
 marched for Gloucester, on Christmas day in the 
 morning, 1739 ; the thoughts of parting with all 
 my friends, my wife and children, were ready to 
 break my heart. My sins likewise came all to 
 my remembrance, and my troubles increased 
 night and day. — Nevertheless, when I became 
 acquainted with my comrades I soon returned 
 as a dog to his vomit — Yet God soon renewed 
 my good desires. I began to read, pray, and go 
 to church every day. — But frequently I was so
 
 MR. JOHN HAIME. 
 
 £7 
 
 tempted there, that it was as much as I could do, to 
 avoid blaspheming aloud. Satan suggested, "Curse hiin, 
 curse him!" perhaps an hundred times. My heart as of- 
 ten replied "No! No! No!" Then he suggested. "Thou 
 hast sinned against the Holy Ghost." But I still cried un- 
 to God though the deep waters flowed over me, and des- 
 pair closed me in on every side. 
 
 Soon after we marched to camp at Kingsclear in Hamp- 
 shire. Thence we removed to winter quarters at Far- 
 ringdon. I was still deeply miserable through sin; but 
 not concjuerer over it. This was still my language: 
 
 "Here I repent, and sin again: 
 
 "Now I revive, and now am slain! 
 
 ci Slain with the same unhappy dart, 
 
 "Tfhich Jlhi too often ivounds my heart. 
 After this I quartered at High worth in Wiltshire. 
 Among many old books which were here I found one en- 
 titled, "Grace Abounding to the Chief of Sinners." I 
 read it with the utmost attention, aand found his ca^e 
 nearly resembled my own. Having soon after orders to 
 march for Scotland, we marched the first day to Banbu- 
 ry, where I found again, in a book seller's shop. ''Grace 
 Abounding to the Chief of Sinners." I bought it, and 
 thought it the best book I ever saw: and again I felt spine 
 hope of mercy. In every town where we stayed, 1 went 
 to church. But I did not hear what I wanted, behold 
 the Lamb of God, who taketh away the sin of the world! 
 Being come to Alnwick, Satan desired to have me, that 
 he might sift me as wheat. And the hand of the Lord 
 came upon me with such weight, as made me roar for ve- 
 ry anguish of spirit. I could truly say, the arrows of the 
 Almighty are within me; the poison whereof drinketh up 
 my spirits. — Many times I stopped in the street, afraid 
 to go one step farther, lest I should step into hell. — - 
 Then I cried unto the Lord and said, "Why hast thou 
 set me as a mark? let loose thy hand and cut me oft', that 
 I sin no more against thee." I said, "Is thy mercy clean 
 gone for ever? And must I perish at the last? Save, Lord, 
 or I perish!" But there was no answer. So all hope 
 was cut off'. 
 
 1 now read, and fasted, and went to church, and pray- 
 ed seven times a day. One day as 1 walked by the 
 Tweed side I cried out aloud, being all athirst for God.
 
 28 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 a 0h that thou wouldst hear my prayer, and let my cry 
 come up before thee!" The Lord heard: he sent a gru* 
 cious answer ; he lifted me up out of the dungeon. He 
 took away all my sorrow and fear, and filled my soul 
 with peace and joy in the Holy Ghost The stream gli- 
 ded sweetly along, and all nature seemed to rejoice with 
 me. I was truly free; and had I had any to guide me, I 
 need never more have come into bondage. But I was so 
 ignorant, I thought I should know war no more. I began 
 to be at ease in Sion, and forgot to watch and pray, till 
 God laid his hand upon me again. I then again went 
 mourning all the day long: till one Sabbath, as I was go- 
 ing to church, I stood still like a condemned criminal be- 
 fore his judge, and said, '-Lord what am I going to church 
 for. I have nothing to bring or offer thee, but sin and a 
 deceitful heart." I had no sooner spoke than my heart 
 melted within me, and I cried earnestly to him for mer- 
 cy, till my strength failed me, and it was with difficulty 
 I could walk out of the room. 
 
 The next morning as I was going to water my horse, 
 just as he entered the river, in a moment I felt the love of 
 God flowing into my soul. Instantly all pain and sor- 
 row fled away. No fear of hell or the Devil was left, but 
 love to God and all mankind now filled my ravish ed soul. 
 As the people with whom I quartered had often the Bi- 
 ble and other good books in their hands, I told them what 
 God had done for my soul: but they understood me not. 
 However I doubted not, but my comrade would rejoice 
 with me, being accounted a religious man. But 1 was 
 disappointed again. His answer was, "Take care; for Sa- 
 tan can transform himself into an angel of light." Thus 
 finding none who was able to give me any instruction or 
 direction. I soon got into unprofitable reasonings, which 
 damped my fervour, so that in a little time, I was again 
 in heaviness. 
 
 Soon after I wa9 sent with the camp equipage to Lon- 
 don. The next day I marched for Leith, I had scarce set 
 out, when God was pleased to reveal himself in a most com 
 fortable manner to my soul. And my comfort increas- 
 ed all the day, so that I hardly knew how I went. We 
 waited for the ship seven days. During th'13 time I was 
 off my watch again: so that before we sailed, I was weak 
 and like another man. For two days we had pleasant
 
 MR. JOHN HAIME 29 
 
 weather, but on the third, the wind suddenly arose, at- 
 tended with furious rain.' The seas frequently covered 
 the ship, and in the midst of our distress, broke in to the 
 main hatches. I was not (as Jonah) asleep in the side9 
 of the ship, but was just at my wits' end. I prayed with 
 many tears, expecting every moment the sea to be my 
 grave. I was grieved, that I had so abused the goodness 
 of God, and troubled beyond expression. The storm 
 lasted two days and two nights: then God was pleased to 
 still the winds and seas. 
 
 At our arrival in London I was somewhat refreshed 
 in spirit, being truly thankful, that I was out of hell. 
 But I was soon in the depth of despair again, afraid of 
 dropping into hell every moment. Soon after I went to 
 hear Mr. Cennick, (then one of Mr. Whitfield's preach- 
 ers) at Deptford. Coming back I told him the distress 
 of my soul. He said, "the work of the Devil is upon 
 you," and rode away! It was of the tender mercies of 
 God, that I did not put an end to my life. I cried, "O 
 Lord, my punishment is greater than I can bear!" 
 
 Yet I thought, if 1 must be damned myself, I will do 
 what I can that others may be saved. So I began to re- 
 prove open sin, whenever I saw or heard it, and to warn 
 the ungodly, that if they did not repent, they would sure- 
 ly perish. But if I found any that were weary and hea- 
 vy laden, I told them to wait upon the Lord, and he 
 would renew their strength. Yet I found no strength 
 myself, till reading one day, in what manner God mani- 
 fested himself to Mr. Cennick, I cried out, "Lord, if there 
 be any mercy for me, reveal it to me!" I was answered 
 by so strong an impression on my heart, as left me with- 
 out a doubt, "I have loved thee with an everlasting love." 
 Immediately my soul melted within me, and I was filled 
 with joy unspeakable. 
 
 Having joined my regiment again, we marched to Col- 
 chester. Here I found much peace, and communion 
 with God, which humbled me to the dust. Our next re- 
 move was to Brentford where I had the happiness ot hear- 
 ing Mr. Charles Wesley preach. — When the service was 
 over I had a great desire of speaking to him, but knew 
 not how to be so bold. Yet taking courage, I ventured 
 to tell him my situation of mind. He gave me much en- 
 couragement, and bid me go on and not fear, neither be 
 
 3*
 
 30 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 dismayed at any temptation. His words sunk deep, 
 and were a great blessing to me, for several years after. 
 
 Soon after we had an order to march for Flanders. 
 This threw me into fresh reasoning. The thought of leav- 
 ing my country, and the danger ensuing, by sea and by 
 land, sat heavy upon my spirit. I soon lost my peace, 
 nay, and hope too. 1 knew I had tasted of the good word, 
 and of the powers of the world to come. Yet this gave 
 me no comfort; nay, it aggravated my sorrow, to think of 
 losing all that God had done for me. But the more I 
 Ktruggled, the deeper I sunk, till I was quite swallowed 
 up of sorrow. And though I called upon God, yea with 
 strong cries and tears, yet for a long time I had no com- 
 fortable answer. 
 
 For a long time I was so dejected and confused, that 
 I had no heart to keep a regular account of any thing. 
 In this state I was, when we embarked for Flanders, in 
 June, 1742, and as long as we stayed there. It was on 
 February the 18th, 174S, that we began our march from 
 Ghent to Germany. When I came to my quarters my 
 heart was ready to break, thinking I was upon the very 
 brink of hell. We halted six days, and then marched 
 again. The day following, as soon as I had mounted my 
 horse, the love of God was shed abroad in my heart. I 
 knew God, for Christ's sake, had forgiven all my sins, 
 and felt, where the spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty. 
 This I enjoyed about three weeks, but then lost it, by 
 grieving the Holy Spirit of God. 1 then walked about, 
 much cast down, and knew not what to do. But April 
 22, the Lord shewed me, that I did not live as became 
 the Gospel of Christ. I was greatly ashamed before God. 
 In the evening as 1 was walking in the fields with an hea- 
 vy heart, I prayed earnestly to God, that he would smite 
 the rock, and cause the waters to flow. He answered 
 my prayer. My head was waters, and my eyes as a 
 fountain of tears. 1 wept: 1 sung. 1 had such a sense 
 of the love of God, as surpasses all description. Well 
 might Solomon say, love is strong as death. Now 1 was, 
 1 had a right to the tree of life: and knew, if 1 then put 
 off' the body, 1 should enter into life eternal. 
 
 Feeling 1 wanted help both from God and man, 1 wrote 
 to Mr. Wesley; who sent me a speedy answer, as fol- 
 lows:
 
 MR JOHN haime; 51 
 
 "It is a great blessing whereof God has already made 
 you a partaker: but if you continue waiting upon him 
 you shall see greater things than these. — This is only 
 the beginning of the kingdom of heaven which he will 
 set up in your heart. There is yet behind, the fulness 
 of the mind that wa9 in Christ, righteousness, peace, 
 and joy in the Holy Ghost. It is but a little thing that 
 men should be against you, while you know God is on 
 your side. If he gives you any companion in the narrow 
 way, it is well; and it is well if he does not. So much 
 the more will he teach and strengthen you by himself: 
 he will instruct you in the secret of your heart. And 
 by and by, he will you raise up, as it were out of the dust 
 those who shall say. ''Come and let us magnify his name 
 together." But by all means miss no opportunity. Speak 
 and spare not: declare what God has done for your soul: 
 regard not worldly prudence. Be not ashamed of Christ; 
 or of his word, or of his work, or of his servants. Speak 
 the truth in love, even in the midst of a crooked genera- 
 tion; and all things shall work togethe* for good, until 
 the work of God is perfect in your soul." 
 
 We now marched on through a pleasant country; and 
 my soul was full of peace. 1 did speak, and not spare, 
 with little interruption, only at one time, when as 1 was 
 speaking of the goodness of God, one of our officers, (and 
 one that was accounted a very religious man!) told me, 
 "1 deserved to be cut in pieces, and to be given to the 
 Devil." But 1 was enabled (blessed be God!) to love, pi- 
 ty, and pray for him. 
 
 After a long and tiresome march, we arrived at Det- 
 tingen. Here we lay in camp for some time, \ery near 
 the French: only the river Mayne ran between us. June 
 16, 1 was ordered out on the grand guard with all expe- 
 dition. When we came to the place appointed, 1 saw 
 many of the French army marching on the other side of 
 the river: It was not long before 1 heard the report of a 
 French cannon. 1 said, "we shall have a battle to day;" 
 but my comrades did not believe me. Presently 1 heard 
 
 another, and then a third; the ball came along by us 
 
 Many of the French had crossed the river, and many 
 more were in full march toward it. We had orders to 
 return with all speed. The firing increased very fast; 
 and several were killed or wounded, some by the can-
 
 32 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 non balls, and some by the limbs of the trees which the 
 balls cut off. Meantime we marched on one side of the 
 river; part of the French army on the other. The battle 
 was soon joined with small arms, as well as cannon, on 
 both sides. It was very bloody; thousands on each side 
 were sent to their long home. 1 had no sooner joined 
 the regiment, than my left-hand man was shot dead. I 
 cried to God and said, in thee have 1 trusted, let me 
 never be confounded! My heart was filled with love, 
 peace and joy, more than tongue can express. 1 was in 
 a new world. 1 could truly say : Unto you that be- 
 lieve he is precious. I stood the fire of the enemy seven 
 hours. And when the battle was over, 1 was sent out 
 with a party of men to find the baggage wagons, but re- 
 turned without success. In the mean while the army 
 was gone, and 1 knew not which way. 1 went to the 
 field where the battle was fought; but such a scene of 
 human misery did 1 never behold! It was enough to melt 
 the most obdurate heart. 1 knew not, now, which way 
 to take, being afraid of falling into the hands of the ene- 
 my. But as it began to rain hard, 1 set out, though not 
 knowing where to go; till hearing the beat of a drum, I 
 went toward it, and soon rejoined the army. But 1 
 could not find the tent to which 1 belonged, nor persuade 
 them to take me in at any other. So being very wet, and 
 much fatigued 1 wrapt me up in my cloak, and, lay down 
 and fell asleep. And though it still rained hard upon 
 me, and the water ran under me, 1 had as sweep a night's 
 rest as ever 1 had in my life. 
 
 "We had now to return from Germany to Flanders, to 
 take up our winter quarters. In our march we were 
 some time near the river Mayne, twenty miles from the 
 field of battle. We saw the dead men lie in the river, 
 and on the bank, as dung for the earth. Many of the 
 French, attempting to pass the river, after we had bro- 
 ken down the b; idge, were drowned, and many cast upon 
 the banks, where there was none to bury them. 
 
 Being in Ghent, I went one Sabbath morning, to the 
 English church at the usual time. But neither minister 
 nor people came. As 1 was walking in the church, two 
 men belonging to the train came in, John Evans and Pit- 
 man Stag. One of them said, "The people are long in 
 coming." 1 said, "Yet they think, however they live, of
 
 MR. JOHN HAIME. S3 
 
 going to Heaven when they die. But most of them, 1 
 fear, will be sadly disappointed." They stared at me, 
 and asked what 1 meant? 1 told them, "Nothing unholy 
 can dwell with a holy God." We had a little more talk, 
 and appointed to meet in the evening. 1 found John 
 Evans a strict Pharisee, doing justly and loving mercy, 
 but knowing nothing of walking humbly with his God. — 
 But the cry of Pitman Stag was, God be merciful to me 
 a sinner! We took a room wi'hout delay, and met eve- 
 ry night, to pray and read the Holy Scriptures. In a lit- 
 tle time we were as speckled birds, as men wondered at. 
 But some began to listen under the window, and soon af- 
 ter desired to meet with us. Our meetings were soon 
 sweeter than our food: and 1 found therein such an en- 
 largement of soul, and such an increase in spiritual 
 knowledge, that 1 resolved to go, come life, come death. 
 
 We had now twelve joined together, several of whom 
 had already found peace with God; the others were ear- 
 nestly following after it; and it was not long before they 
 attained. Hereby new love and zeal were kindled in us 
 all; and although Satan assaulted us various ways, yet 
 wei-e we enabled to discern •!! his wiles, and to with- 
 stand all his power. — Several of them are now safely 
 landed on the blissful shore of glorious immortality: 
 where, as a weather be?ten bark, worn out with storms, 
 may t~at last happily arrive, and find the children whom 
 God has been graciously pleaded to give me, through the 
 word of his power! 
 
 One night, after our meeting, I told the people, we 
 should have the room full before we left the city. We 
 goon increased to about twenty members. And love in- 
 creased so, that shame and fear vanished away. Our 
 sinking was heard afar off, and we regarded not those 
 who made no account of our labours. Such was the in- 
 crease of our faith, love and joy in the Holy Ghost, that 
 we had no barren meetings. Such our love to each other, 
 that even the sight of each other filled our hearts with di- 
 vine consolation. And as love increased among us, so 
 did conviction among others; and in a little time we had 
 a society. So that now (as 1 had told them before) the 
 room was too small to hold the people. 
 
 May 1, 1744, we marched frjtn Ghent, and encamp- 
 ed near Brussels. Our camp lay on the side of a hill:
 
 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 we set up our standing on a hill just opposite. We were 
 easily heard by the soldiers in the camp, who soon began 
 to fly as a cloud, and as doves to the windows. Here 1 
 gathered together my scattered sheep and lambs. They 
 were the joy of my heart, and 1 trust to find them again, 
 among that great multitude that no man can number. — 
 O what a work did God put into my hand! And who is 
 sufficient for these things? But God had given me such 
 faith, that had 1 continued stedfast in the grace of God, 
 neither things present, nor things to come, nor any crea- 
 ture, could have hindered my growing in the knowledge 
 of Jesus Christ, unto my dying hour. 
 
 I took great delight in the eleventh chapter to the He- 
 brews. 1 read it over and over, and prayed much for 
 faith. — This was first in the day, and the last at night in 
 my mind : and 1 had no more doubt of the promises con- 
 tained therein, than if God had called to me from heaven, 
 and said, "This is my word, and it shall stand forever." 
 When 1 began preaching, 1 did not understand one text 
 in the Bible, so as to speak from it in (what is called) a 
 regular manner, yet I never wanted either matter or 
 words. So hath God in all ages, chosen the weak things 
 of the world to confound the things that are mighty. 1 
 usually had a thousand hearers officers, common soldiers, 
 and others. Was there ever so great a work before in 
 so abandoned an army ! But we can only say, there is 
 nothing too hard for God! He works what, and by whom 
 he pleaseth. 
 
 I was now put to a stand. 1 had so much duty to do, 
 the society to take care of, and to preach four or live 
 times a day, that it was more than 1 could well perform. 
 But God soon took care for this also. 1 looked for no 
 favour from man: 1 wanted nothing from men. 1 feared 
 nothing: God so increased my love and zeal. Light and 
 heat filled my soul, and it was my meat and drink to do 
 the will of my heavenly Father. 1 cried earnestly to him, 
 to clear my way, and remove all hindrances. Glory be 
 to his name, he did so: for two years after this time, 1 was 
 entirely at my liberty. 1 found means of hiring others 
 to do my duty, which proved an unspeakable advantage. 
 The work was great before; but we soon found a greater 
 increase of it than ever. If Christianity consists in love 
 and obedience to God, and love to all men, friends and 
 enemies, we had now got a Christian society; we had the
 
 MK. JOHN HAIME. 35 
 
 good land in possession. But this was not enough: still 
 there vva9 as earnest a cry in our souls, for all the mind 
 which was in Christ, as there was in David, for the wa- 
 ter of the well of Bethlehem. 
 
 Our general method was, as soon as we were settled 
 in a camp, to build a tabernacle, containing two, three, 
 or four rooms, as we saw convenient. One day three 
 officers came to see our Chapel, as they called it. They 
 asked many questions; one in particular asked me, what 
 1 preached? 1 answered, "1 preach against swearing, whor- 
 ing and drunkenness, and exhort men to repent of all their 
 sins, that they may not perish." He began swearing 
 horribly, and said.ifit was in his power he would have me 
 whipt to death. 1 told him, "Sir, you have a commis- 
 sion over men: but 1 have a commission from God, to tell 
 you, you must either repent of your sins, or perish ever- 
 lastingly." He went away, and 1 went on, being never 
 better than when 1 was preaching or at prayer. For the 
 Lord gave such a blessing to his word, that 1 thought 
 every discourse lost, under which no one was either con- 
 vinced or converted to God. 
 
 We had now three hundred in the society, and six 
 preachers, besides myself. It was therefore no wonder, 
 that many of the officers and chaplains endeavoured to 
 stop the work. But it was altogether lost labour; He that 
 sitteth in Heaven laughed them to scorn. And 1 doubt 
 not, but he would have given me strength to have suffer- 
 ed death, rather than have given them up. 
 
 It was reported by many, that 1 was utterly distract- 
 ed. Others endeavoured to incense the field-marshal 
 against me. 1 was examined several times; but, blessed 
 be God he stood by me, and encouraged me to go on, to 
 speak and not hold my peace; neither did lie suffer any 
 man to set upon me to hurt me. And so great was my 
 love and joy in believing, that it carried me above all 
 those things, which would otherwise have been grievous 
 to flesh and blood, so that all was pleasant to me. 
 "•The winter's night, and summer's day, 
 "Fled imperceptibly away." 
 
 I frequently walked between twenty and thirty miles 
 a day; and preached rive and thirty times, in the space of 
 seven days. So great was my love to God, and to the 
 souls which he hath purchased with his own blood. Ma-
 
 36 EXPERrEVCE o» 
 
 ny times 1 have forgotten to take any refreshment for 
 ten hours together. 1 had at this time three armies 
 against me; the French army, the wicked English army, 
 and an army of devils. But 1 feared them not; for my 
 life was hid with Christ in God. He supported me 
 through all: and 1 trust will be my God and my guide 
 even unto death. 
 
 While the work of God thus flourished among the Eng- 
 lish, he visited also the Hanoverian army. A few of 
 them began to meet together; and their number daily in- 
 creased But they were quickly ordered to meet bo more. 
 They were very unwilling to desist. But some of them 
 being severely punished, the rest did not dare to disobey. 
 It is clear,the Devil and the world will suffer a man to 
 be any thing, but a real Christian! 
 
 My present comrade was an extremely wicked man. 
 He came home one day, cursing and swearing, that he 
 had lost his money; he searched for it, and after some 
 time found it. He threw it <-n the table and said. " There 
 is my ducat; but no thanks to God, any more than to the 
 devil." I wrote down the word*, and complained to our 
 commanding officer. After a few day* he was tried by a 
 court martial. The officer asked, what 1 had to say 
 against him? I gave him the writing. When he had read 
 them, he asked me; if I was not ashamed to take account 
 of such matters as this? I answered, *' No Sir; if I had 
 heard such words spoken against his majesty, King 
 George, would not you have counted me a villain if! had 
 eoncealed them?" His mouth was stopped, and the man 
 cried for pardon. The captain told him he was worthy 
 of death, by the law of God and man, asked me, ••What 
 1 desired to have done?" 1 answered, I desiied only to 
 be parted from him, and I hoped he would recent. Or- 
 ders were given that we should be parted. This also was 
 matte; of gi eat thankfulness. 
 
 From camp we removed to our winter quarters at Bru- 
 ges. Here we had a lively Society; but our preaching 
 room was far too small to contain the congregation. 
 Theie was a very spacious place appointed for the pub- 
 lic worship of our army, commouly called the English 
 Church. General Sinclaii was now our commanding offi- 
 cer. I went to his house, and begged l°ave to si»eak to 
 him. He told me, if 1 had business with him i should
 
 MR JOHN HAIME. 37 
 
 have sent my captain, and not come to him myself. 1 
 told him I had the liberty of speaking to the duke of 
 Cumberland. He then asked me what I wanted? I said, 
 " Please your honour, I come to beg a great favour; that 
 I may have the use of the English church to pray in, and 
 exhort my comrades to flee from the wrath to come." 
 He was verv angry, and told me, I should not preach, or 
 pray any where but in the barracks. He asked, "But 
 how came you to preach?" I said, "The Spirit of God 
 constrains me to call my fellow sinners to repentance." 
 He said," Then you must restrain that Spirit." I told 
 him "I would die first." He said, "You are in my hand," 
 and turned away in a great rage. 
 
 I cried to the Lord for more faith, that I might never 
 deny him, whatsoever I was called to suffer; but might 
 own him before men and devils: and very soon after 
 God removed this hindrance out of the way: general 
 Sinclair was removed from Bruges, and general Ponson- 
 by took his place. I went to his house, and was without 
 difficulty admitted to his presence. Upon his asking 
 what I wanted, I said, "I come to beg your honour will 
 grant us the use of the English church, that we may meet 
 together and worship God." He asked, "what religion 
 are you of?" I answered, "of the church of England" 
 Then said he, "you shall have it." I went to the clerk 
 for the keys; but he said the, "the chaplains forbade it, 
 and I should not have them." The general then gave 
 me an order under his hand. So they were delivered. 
 I fixed up advertisements in several parts of the town, 
 "Preaching every day at two o'clock, in the English 
 church." And we had every day a numerous congrega- 
 tion, both of soldiers and townsfolk. 
 
 We had some good singers amongst us, and one in 
 particular, who was a master of music. It pleased God 
 to make this one great means of drawing many to hear 
 -his word. One sabbath the clerk gave out a psalm. It 
 was sung in a hymn tune; and sung so well, that the 
 officers and their wives were quite delighted with it. The 
 society then agreed, to go all together to church every 
 sabbath. On the next sabbath we began. And when the 
 clerk gave out the first line of the psalm, one of us set 
 the tune, and the rest followed him. It was a resemblance 
 of heaven upon earth. Such a company of Christian s«l- 
 
 4 
 
 .
 
 3S EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 diers singing together, with the spirit and the understand- 
 ing also, gave such life to the ordinance, that none but 
 the most vicious and abandoned could remain entirely 
 tin affected. 
 
 The spring following, we took the field again: and on 
 May 11, 1745, we had a full trial of our faith, at Fonte- 
 noy. Some days before, one of our brethren standing at 
 his tent door, broke out into raptures of joy, knowing his 
 departure was at hand; and when he went into the battle 
 declared, "I am going to rest in the bosom of Jesus." In - 
 deed this day God was pleased to prove our little flock, 
 and to shew them his mighty power. They shewed such 
 courage and boldness in the fight, as made the officers as 
 well as soldiers amazed. When wounded, some cried 
 out, "I am going to my beloved." — Others, "Come Loud 
 Jesus, come quickly." And many that were not wound- 
 ed earnestly desired to be dissolved, and to be with Christ. 
 When W. Clements had his arm broke by a musket ball, 
 they would have carried him out of the battle. But he 
 said," No: I have an arm left to hold my sword: I will 
 not go yet." When a second shot broke his other arm, 
 he said, " I am as happy as I can be out of paradise." 
 John Evans having both his lega taken off by a cannon- 
 ball, was laid across a cannon to die; where, as long as he 
 could speak, he was praising God and blessing him with 
 joyful lips. 
 
 For my own part, I stood the hottest fire of the enemy 
 for above seven hours. But 1 told my comrades," The 
 French have no ball made that will kill me this day." 
 After about seven hours, a cannon ball killed my horse 
 under me. An officer cried out aloud, "Haime! where 
 is vour God now?" I answered, "Sir, he is here with me; 
 and he will bring me out of this battle. " Presently a 
 cannon ball took off his head. My horse fell upon me, 
 and some cried out, "Haime is gone!" But I replied, 
 "He is not gone yet." I soon disengaged myself, and 
 walked on, praising God. I was exposed both to the ene- 
 my and to our own horse ; but that did not discourage mo 
 at all; for I knew the God of Jacob was with me. I had 
 a long way to go through all our horse, the balls flying on 
 every side. And all the way, multitudes lay bleeding, 
 o-roaning, dyirig, or just dead. Surely I was as in the 
 fiery furnace; but it did not singe a hair of my head.
 
 MR. JOHN HAIME. 39 
 
 The hotter the battle grew, the more strength was given 
 me. I was as full of joy as I could contain. As I was 
 quitting the field, I met one of our brethren, with a lit- 
 tle dish in his hand, seeking water. I did not know him 
 at first, being covered with blood. He smiled and said, 
 "brother Haime, I have got a sore wound." I asked, 
 "Have you got Christ in your heart?" He said, '-I have; 
 and have had him all this day." I have seen many good 
 and glorious days, wilh much of the power of God. But 
 I never saw more of it than this day. Glory be to God 
 for all his mercies!'' Among the dead there was great 
 plenty of watches, and of gold and silver. One asked 
 me, will not you get something? I answered, "No, I 
 have got Christ, I will have no plunder." 
 
 But the greatest loss I sustained was that of my fellow 
 labourers. William Clement* was sent to the hospital. 
 John Evans, Br. Bishop and Greenwood were killed in 
 the battle. Two others, who used to speak boldly, fell 
 into Antinomianism. So I was left alone: but I was per- 
 suaded, this also was for my good. And seeing iniquity 
 so much abound, and the love of many waxing cold, it 
 added wings to my devotion. And my faith grew daily, 
 as a tree planted by the water side. 
 
 One of those Antinomian preachers professed to be al- 
 ways happy, but was frequently drunk twice a day. 
 One Sunday, when I was five or six miles off' he took an 
 opportunity of venting his devilish opinions. One hasted 
 after me, and begged me to return. I did so; but the 
 mischief was done. He had convinced many, that we 
 have nothing to do with the law, either before or after 
 our conversion. When I came in, the people looked 
 greatly confused: I perceived there was a great rent in 
 the society, and after preaching and prayer, said, "You 
 that are for the old doctrine, which you have heard from 
 the beginning, follow me." Out of three hundred, 1 lost 
 about fifty: but the Lord soon gave me fifty more. The 
 two Antinomians set up for themselves, until lying, 
 drunkenness, and many other sins, destroyed both preach- 
 ers and people, all but a few that came back to their 
 brethren. 
 
 We had no sacrament administered in the army for a 
 long season. I was greatly troubled, and complained 
 aloud in the open camp of the neglect. The chaplains
 
 40 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 were exceedingly displeased. But the duke ot Cumber- 
 land hearing of it, ordered that it should be administered 
 every Lord's day, to one regiment or the other. 
 
 The duke hearing many complaints of me, enquired 
 who I was; if I did my duty: if I would tight: and if I 
 prayed for a blessing on the king and his arms. They 
 told his royal highness I did all this as well as any man 
 in the regiment. He asked, "Then what have you to say 
 against him?" They said, "Why he prays and preaches 
 so much that there i» no rest for him." Afterwards the 
 duke talked with me himself, and asked me many ques- 
 tions. He seemed so well satisfied with my answers, 
 that he bade me, "Go on;" and gave out a general order, 
 that I might preach any where, and no man should mo- 
 lest me. 
 
 I was preaching one day, when the duke, unknown to 
 we, came to hear me. I, that day, desired the soldiers, 
 never to come there, or to any place of public worship, 
 so as to neglect any duty. I exhorted them to be ready 
 at all calls, and to obey those who had rule over them: and 
 if called out to battle, to stand fast, yea, if needful, fight 
 up to the knees in blood, i said, "You fight for a good 
 cause, and for a good king, and in defence of your coun- 
 try. And this is no ways contrary to the tenderest con- 
 science, as many of you found at the battle of Fon- 
 tenoj, when both you and I did our duty, and yet 
 were all the time filled with love and peace; and joy in 
 the Holy Ghost," 
 
 I had now for some years endeavoured to keep a con- 
 science void of offence toward God and toward man: and 
 for near three years I had known that God for Christ's 
 sake, had forgiven all my sins, I had enjoyed the full as- 
 surance of faith, which made me rejoice in all conditions: 
 wet and weary, cold and hungry, I was happy; finding a 
 daily increase in faith and love. I had constant commu- 
 nion with the Father and the Son. It was my delight to 
 do his blessed will, to do good to them that hated me, and 
 to cal 1 all sinners to behold the Lamb of God which taketh 
 away the sin of the world. But oh! how did the mighty 
 fall, and the weapons of war perish! April 6, 1746, I 
 was off my watch, and fell by a grievous temptation. 
 It came as quick as lightning;! knew not if I was in my 
 senses; but I fell, and the spirit of God departed from me
 
 MR. JOHN HAIME. 41 
 
 It was a great mercy that I did not fall into hell! Blessed 
 be God for that word, If any man sin, we have an Advo- 
 cate with the Father, Jesus Christ the Righteous: But 
 it was twenty years before I found him to be an Advo- 
 cate for me, with the Father a<>;ain. 
 
 My fall was both gradual and instantaneous. I first 
 grew negligent in watching and prayer, and in reading 
 the Scriptures. I then indulged myself more and more, 
 laying out upon my own appetite, what 1 before gave to 
 my poor brethren. I next began to indulge the lust of 
 the eyes, to look at and covet pleasing things, till by little 
 and little 1 became shorn of my strength, having left my 
 former love. For many years I had scrupled buying or 
 selling the least thing on the Lord's day. The sixth of 
 April was on a sabbath. That day I was sent to Antwerp 
 for forage: several of my comrades desired me to buy 
 them some things, which accordingly I did. I had an in- 
 ward check, but I over-ruled it, and quickly after became 
 a prey to the enemy. Instantly my condemnation was 
 so great, that I was on the point of destroying myself: 
 God restrained me from this, but Satan was let loose, and 
 followed me by day and by night. The agony of my mind 
 weighed down my body, and threw me into a bloody flux. 
 1 was carried to an hospital, just dropping into hell. But 
 the Lord upheld me with an unseen hand, quivering over 
 the great gulph. 
 
 Before my fall, my flight was so strong, that I could 
 look steadfastly on the sun at noon day. But after it, I 
 could not look a man in the face, nor bear to be in any 
 company. Indeed I thought myself far more fit for the 
 society of devils than of men: every thing was a burden 
 to me, and grievous to be borne. The roads, the hedges, 
 the trees; every thing seemed cursed of God. Nature 
 appeared void of God, and in the possession of the Devil. 
 The fowls of the air, and the beasts of the field, all ap- 
 peared in a league against me, I had not one ray of 
 hope, but a fearful looking for a fiery indignation. Very 
 frequently Judas was represented to me as hanging just 
 before me. Had I been cut with knives from head to 
 foot, I could not have been more sore in my flesh than 
 in my spirit. — How true is it, the spirit of man may sus- 
 tain his infirmities : but a wounded spirit who can bear? 
 
 I clearly saw the unshaken faith, the peace, joy and 
 
 4 *
 
 42 EXPERIENCE Of 
 
 love, which I had cast away, and felt the return of pride, 
 anger self-will,$and every other devilish temper. And 
 I knew by melancholy experience, that my last state was 
 worse than the first. I was one day drawn out into the 
 woods, lamenting my forlorn state: and on a sudden I 
 began to weep bitterly. From weeping, I fell to howling 
 like a wild beast, so that the woods resounded. Yet 
 could I say, notwithstanding my bitter cry, my stroke 
 is heavier than my groaning. Nevertheless, I could not 
 say, "Lord have mercy upon me," if I could have pur- 
 chased heaven thereby. 
 
 So great was the displeasure of God against me, that 
 he in a great measure took away the sight of my eyes. 
 I could not see the sun for more than eight months: even 
 in the clearest summer day, it always appeared to me 
 like amass of blood: at the same time I lost the use of 
 my knees. I cannot describe what I felt. I could truly 
 say, "Thou hast sent fire into my bones." I was often 
 as hot as if I was burning to death: many times I looked, 
 to see if my clothes were not on fire. I have gone into 
 a river to cool myself: but it was all the same. For 
 what could quench the wrath of his indignation, that was 
 let loose upon me? at other times, in the midst of summer, 
 I have been so cold, that I knew not how to bear it. All 
 the clothes I could put on had no effect, but my flesh 
 shivered, and my very bones quaked. God grant, reader, 
 that thou and I may never feel, how hot or cold it is in 
 hell! 
 
 I was afraid to pray; for I thought the die was cast, and 
 my damnation sealed. So I thought, it availed not, if all 
 the saints upon earth, and all the angels in heaven should 
 intercede for me. I was angry at God, angry at myself, 
 and angry at the Devil. I thought 1 was possesed with 
 more devils than Mary Magdalen. I cannot remember, 
 that I had one comfortable hope, for seven years together. 
 Only while I was preaching to others, my distress was a 
 little abated. But some may enquire, what could move 
 me to preach, while I was in such a forlorn condition? 
 They must ask of God, for I cannot tell: "His ways here- 
 in are past my finding out." 
 
 In all my trials, I have, by the grace of God, invariably 
 kept to one point, preaching repentance towards God, 
 faith in our Lord Jesus Christ: testifying that % grace
 
 MH. JOHN HAIME. 4o 
 
 are ye saved through faith, that now is the day of sal- 
 vation; and that this salvation is for all; that Christ tast- 
 ed death for every one, I always testified, that ivithout 
 holiness no man shall see the Lord; and that if any, 
 though ever so holy, draw back, they will perish everlast- 
 ingly. I continually expected this would be my lot: 
 yet "after some years, I attempted again to pray. With 
 this, Satan was not well pleased; for one day as I was 
 walking alone, and faintly crying for mercy, suddenly 
 such a hot blast of brimstone flashed in my face, as al- 
 most took away my breath. And presently after, as I 
 walked along, an invisible power struck up my heels, and 
 threw me violently upon my face. 
 
 When we came back to Holland, I had now and then 
 a spark of hope. One Sabbath I went to church, where 
 the Lord's supper was to be administered. I had a great 
 desire to partake of it. But the enemy came in like a 
 flood to hinder me, pouring in temptations of every kind. 
 1 resisted him with my might, till through the agony of 
 my mind, the blood gushed out of my mouth and nose. 
 However, I was enabled to conquer, and to partake of 
 the blessed elements, sol still waited on God in the way 
 of his judgments, and he led me in a ivay I had not 
 known. 
 
 Whatsoever my inward distress was, I always endeav- 
 oured to appear free among the people. And it pleased 
 God to make me fruitful in the land of my affliction. He 
 gave me favour in their sight: and many children were 
 born unto the Lord. Indeed, I could speak but very lit- 
 tle Dutch, with regard to common things: but when we 
 came to talk of the things of God, I could speak a great 
 deal. And after I had been at prayer, many have told 
 me they could understand almost every word I said. — 
 But what was this to me? I was miserable still, having no 
 comfortable sense of the presence and favour of God. 
 
 I had heard of an old experienced Christian at Rotter- 
 dam. I went to see him, and found him in an upper room, 
 fur oished like that which the Shunamite prepared for 
 Elisha. He looked at me, but did not speak one word, 
 lio.vever, I told him a little of my experience. He look- 
 ed earnestly at me, and su««M*)egan to speak, and tell 
 me all his heart. He said he had lived for several years 
 in the favour and love of God, when thinking himself
 
 A 
 
 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 stronger than he was, Satan got an advantage over him. 
 The Spirit departed from him; his strength was gone; and 
 he knew not where to fly for refuge. For ten years, sin 
 held him in its iron bondage, and in inexpressible anguish 
 and despair. But one day, as he was making his com- 
 plaint to God, on a sudden light broke in: sorrow fled 
 away, and his soul was like the chariots of Amminadib. 
 The change was so great, that he was utterly lost in won- 
 der love and praise. He knew God had created a clean 
 heart, and renewed a right spirit within him. And he 
 had now lived thirty years, without one doubt of what 
 God had wrought. This gave me considerable satisfac- 
 tion: but it lasted only a short time. 
 
 When we were going for winter quarters, into a town 
 in Holland, 1 was sent thither before our troop. A gen- 
 tleman sent for me, asked, 'If 1 knew John Haimft?" 1 
 said, "1 am the man." — He said, "A gentlewoman in the 
 town wants to speak with you." 1 went to her house, and 
 she bade me welcome. After a little conversation she 
 asked me, "Do you believe that Christ died for all the 
 worldP'VUpon my answering, "1 do," she replied, "1 do 
 not believe one word of it. But as you know he died for 
 you, and 1 know he died for me, we will only talk of his 
 love to poor sinners." We were soon as well acquainted, 
 as if we had lived together many years, and her house 
 became my home. 1 asked, how many she had in family? 
 She said, seven besides herself. 1 asked, "What is to 
 become of all these, that you are so easy about them?" 
 She said, "The Lord will call them in his due time, if 
 they belong to him." 1 asked, "Shall we pray for them?" 
 She said, yes; so 1 began that evening. In a few days the 
 servant maid was cut to the heart; next one of her sons 
 was convinced of sin, and soon after converted to God. 
 And before we left the town, the whole family were 
 athirst for salvation. When the time of our marching 
 drew near, she was in great trouble. But there was no 
 help: so we took our leave ot each other, to meet no more 
 till the morning cf the resurrection. 
 
 At another time I was quartered at Meerkirk, in Hol- 
 land, at a young woman's whose father and mother were 
 lately dead. She had n* s.y cattle, some of which died 
 daily with the distemper; but she never murmured. I 
 sever before met with a woman, that was so ready in the
 
 MR. JOHN HAIME. 4j 
 
 ^cripturei; 1 could not mention any te\i, but she would 
 readily tell the meaning of it. So that it was no wonder, 
 she was thought by others, as well as by herself, to be a 
 prime Christian. 1 was almost of the same mind at first: 
 but when 1 had narrowly observed her, 1 was thoroughly 
 convinced she was deceived, and judged it my duty to 
 undeceive her. 1 told her, "You are not born of God, 
 you have no living faith. She beared me with much com- 
 posure of mind; but she did not believe me. I continued 
 for three weeks pressing it upon her, at all opportuni- 
 ties. And one evening, the Lord made a few words, 
 which I spoke, sharper than a two-edged sword. Convic- 
 tion so fastened upon her heart, that she was soon ob- 
 liged to take her bed. She lay about seven hours in deep 
 distress. She then had a comfortable hope: and this 
 strengthened her body for a few days. But then her 
 convictions returned so heavy, that she was obliged to 
 take her bed again, in great agony of mind. The town's 
 people were alarmed, and ran in crouds to enquire what 
 was the matter: " What could distress her, who had 
 enough of this world's wealth, and was so good a woman?" 
 But they gave her no satisfaction. As soon as they were 
 gone, she immediately called out, **.0 John! I shall go to 
 hell, the Devil will carry me away." 1 said, " No! You 
 shall not go to hell! The Lord died for poor sinners." — 
 She lay in this distress about ten days, and was brought 
 to the gates of death. But the good Samaritan then passed 
 by; poured wine and oil into her wounds, and healed both 
 soul and body: so that she broke out, "Jehovah is my 
 strength and my song. He is my salvation. Come all 
 that fear the Lord, and 1 will tell you what he hath done 
 for ray soul." 
 
 1 now thought it would be a blessing both to herself and 
 her neighbors, if she would pray with them. She agreed so 
 to do. I commonly prayed first and she afterwards. Some- 
 times she prayed half an hour together; and often with 
 such demonstration of the spirit, as well as such under- 
 standing, that the whole house seemed full of the pre- 
 sence of the Lord. At other times she wept like a child, 
 and said "Lord! what is this that thou hast done? Thou 
 hast sent a man from another nation, as an instrument 
 of saving me from ruin! 1 was rich before, and in- 
 cased in goods, and knew not that 1 was blind and na-
 
 46 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 ked." Many of her friends and neighbors were concern- 
 ed for he: ; but not so much as she was concerned for them, 
 as well knowing they were seeking death in the error of 
 their life. This she declared to them without reserve; 
 and the publishing (ins strangedoctrine, spread our names 
 far and near, not only through the town, but through the 
 adjacent country. This brought many from distant 
 towns to see her, who usually returned, blessing God for 
 the consolation. Some came upwards of twenty miles in 
 a morning. After breakfast, 1 used to pray first: and she 
 went on. Many of our visitants were much aft'ected, and 
 wept bitterly. A nd the impression did not soon wear off. 
 By this means we became much acquainted with many of 
 the Christians in Holland. They were a free, loving peo- 
 ple. So we found them: and so did many of the Methodist 
 soldiers; for they gave them house room and firing freely. 
 And is not the promise of our Lord sure? ''Whosoever 
 shall give unto one of these a cup of cold water only, in 
 the name of a disciple, shall in no wise lose his reward." 
 
 All this time 1 was still buffeted with sore temptation?. 
 1 thought that 1 was worse than Cain; that 1 had crucified 
 the son of God afresh, and put him to an open shame. — 
 In rough weather, it was often suggested to me, "This is 
 on your account ! See, the earth is cursed for your sake: 
 and it will be no better till you are in hell." 1 expected 
 soon to be a prey for devils, as 1 was driven from all the 
 happiness I once enjoyed. Frequently the trouble of my 
 mind made me so weak in body, that it was with the great- 
 est difficulty 1 performed my exercise. The Lord had 
 indeed given me a trembling heart and failing of eyes, 
 and sorrow of mind. And my life did hang in doubt be- 
 fore me, and 1 feared day and night, having no assurance 
 of my life. Often did 1 wish, 1 had never been converted; 
 often, that 1 had never been born. Sometimes 1 could not 
 bear the sight of a good man without pain; much less be in 
 his company. Yet 1 preached every day, and endeavour- 
 ed to appear open and free to my brethren. 1 encouraged 
 them that were tempted, "Not to fear; the Lord would 
 soon appear for himself." Meantime 1 continued to thun- 
 der out the terrors of the law against the ungodly: al- 
 though some said 1 was too positive. Too positive! What! 
 in declaring the promises and threatenings of God? Nay, 
 if 1 cannot be sure of these, 1 will say to the Bible, as the 
 Devil did to our Lord, What have 1 to do with thee?
 
 -MB. JOHN HAIME 47 
 
 At one time, 1 cannot remmember that 1 had any par- 
 ticular temptation for some weeks. Now, 1 thought, 
 God had forsaken me, and the Devil had no need to 
 trouble himself about me. He then set the case of Francis 
 Spira before me, so that 1 sunk into black despair. Eve- 
 ry thing seemed to make against me. 1 could not open 
 the Bible any where but it comdemned me. 1 was much 
 distressed with dreams and visions of the night. 1 dream- 
 ed one night, that 1 was in hell; another, that 1 was on 
 Mount Etna; that on a sudden, it shook and trembled ex- 
 ceedingly; and that at last, it split asunder in several pla- 
 ces, and sunk into the burning lake, all but that little spot 
 on which 1 stood. O how thankful was 1 for my preserva- 
 tion! And this continued for a while, even after 1 awoke: 
 but then it fled away as a dream. 
 
 1 was often violently tempted to curse, and swear, 
 and blaspheme, before and after, and even whjle 1 was 
 preaching. Sometimes when 1 was in the midst of the 
 congregation, I could hardly refrain from laughing aloud, 
 yea, from uttering all kinds of ribaldry and filthy con- 
 versation. 1 thought, there was none that loved me now, 
 none that had any concern for my soul, but that God 
 had taken away from every body the affection which 
 they once had. 1 cried out, "1 have sinned ! What shall 
 1 do unto Thee, thou preserver of men ? Why hast 
 thou set me as a mark against thee, so that 1 am a burden 
 to myselt ? 1 said, 1 am the man that hath seen affliction, 
 by the rod of his wrath."' Frequently as 1 was going to 
 preach, the devil has set -pon me as a lion, telling me, he 
 would have me just then, so that it has thrown me into a 
 cold sweat. In this agony 1 have often catched hold of 
 the Bible and read, "If any man sin, we have an Advo- 
 cate with the Father, Jesus Christ the Righteous." I 
 have said to the enemy, "This is the word of God, and 
 thou canst not deny it." Hereat he would be like a man 
 that shrunk back from the thrust of a sword. But he 
 would be at me again. 1 again met him in the same way, 
 till at last, (blessed be God!) he fled from me. And even 
 in the midst of his sharpest assaults, God i^ve i.'.ejust 
 strength enough to bear them. He fulfilled his word, my 
 grace i3 sufficient for thee: my strength is made perfect 
 in thy weakness. When he has strongly suggested, just 
 as I was going to preach, "1 will have 'thee at last," I
 
 48 exf. mevce or 
 
 have answered, (sometimes with too much anger) "1 will 
 have another out of thy hand first." And many, while 1 
 was myself in the deep, were truly convinced and con- 
 verted to God. 
 
 When 1 returned to England, and was discharged from 
 the army, 1 went to Mr. Wesley, and asked, if he would 
 permit me to labour with him, as a travelling-preacher? 
 He was willing: so I immediately went into a circuit. 
 But this was far from delivering me from that inexpressi- 
 ble burden of soul, under which 1 still laboured. Hence 
 it was, that 1 could neither be satisfied with preaching, 
 nor without; and that wherever 1 went, 1 was not able to 
 stay long in one place; but was continually wandering to 
 and fro, seeking rest, but finding none. On this account 
 many thought me very unstable, and looked very coldly 
 upon me, as they were wholly unacquainted with the 
 exercise of soul which 1 laboured under. 1 thought if 
 David or Peter had been living, they would have pitied 
 me. But many of my friends had not even tasted of 
 that bread and water of affliction, which had been my 
 meat and drink for many years. May they walk so hum- 
 bly and closely with God, that they may never taste it! 
 
 After 1 had continued some time as a travelling-preach- 
 er, Mr. Wesley took me to travel with him. He knew 
 1 was fallen from my steadfastness; but he knew likewise 
 how to bear with me. And when 1 was absent, he com- 
 forted me by his letters, which were a means, under God, 
 of saving me from utter despair. One of them was as 
 follows: 
 
 "London, June 21, 1748. 
 "My dear brother, 
 
 "Think it not strange, concerning the fiery trial which 
 God hath seen good to try you with. Indeed the chas- 
 tisement, for the present, is not joyous, but giievous; 
 ne\ertheless it will, by and by, bringforth the peaceable 
 fruits of righteousness. It is good for you to be in the 
 fiery furnace; though the flesh be weary to bear it, you 
 shall be purified therein, but not consumed. For there 
 is one with you, whose form is as the Son of God. Oh 
 look up! Take knowledge of him who spreads under- 
 neath you his Everlasting Arms! Lean upon him with 
 the whole weight of your soul; he is yours; lay hold up- 
 on him !
 
 MB. JOHN HAIMfe. 49 
 
 I 
 
 Away let grief and sighing flee, 
 Jesus hath died for thee, for thee. 
 
 li Mercy and peace shall not forsake you. Through 
 every threatening cloud look up ; and wait for happy 
 days." 
 
 In this miserable condition I went to 8haftsbury to 
 see my friends, and spent several days. When one 
 and another came and asked me, " What news ?" I 
 told them, "Good news; Christ died to save sinners." 
 But it seemed to them an idle tale; they cared fur none 
 of these things. One day being half asleep, I was, as 
 it were, thunder struck with an inward voice, saying, 
 "What dost thou here ?" I cried to the Lord for mercy, 
 and gave notice that on the Sabbath following 1 would 
 preach in a place at the end of the town, where four 
 ways met. The town and villages round were soon 
 alarmed, and at the time appointed, I believe there 
 were three or four thousand people. My inward trou- 
 ble seemed suspended. I got upon a wall about seven 
 feet high, and began with prayer. I then gave out my 
 Text. Behold the day cometh that shall burn as an oven; 
 and all the proud, yea, and all that do wickedly, shall be 
 stubble : and the day that cometh shall burn them up, 
 saith the Lord of Hosts, that it shall leave them neither 
 root nor branch, Mai. iv. 1. Surely I preached that 
 sermon with the power of the Holy Ghost sent down 
 from heaven. Twelve, if not fourteen, were convinc- 
 ed of sin, some of whom are, I trust, long ago, safely 
 lodged in Abraham's bosom. In a few weeks, fifty 
 persons were joined together in society. I now preach- 
 ed in a large room several times a week. But the peo- 
 ple were eager to build a house, and appointed a time 
 of meeting to consider of the means : but on the same 
 day I was taken up and put into prison, two men having 
 sworn flatly against me that 1 had made a riot. After 
 I had been in in prison a night and part of a day, I was 
 taken to a public house. It was soon full of people : I 
 immediately began preaching to them : and the lions 
 quickly became lambs. A messenger then came in, to 
 let me know, that I must appear before the Mayor and 
 Alderman. I did so. The town clerk told me, "They 
 would not send me to Durchester jail, if I would work 
 a miracle." I told them, "That is done already. Ma-
 
 50 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 ny swearers and drunkards are become sober, God fear- 
 ing men.*' A lawyer said, "Well, if you will take my 
 advice, you shall not go to prison." I replied, "I sup- 
 pose you mean, if I will give over preaching. But that 
 I dare not do." I was then without any more ado hur- 
 ried away to Dorchester. 
 
 My body was now in prison: but that had been a 
 thing of little consequence, had not my soul remained 
 in prison also; in the dungeon of despair. The jailor 
 soon came and fell into conversation with me; but when 
 I began to preach Jesus, as the only Saviour of sinners, 
 he quickly left me to preach to my fellow-prisoners. — 
 Many of these, having no righteousness of theit own 
 to bring to God, were willing to hear of being saved by 
 grace. So I preached to them several times while I 
 was in prison, and they seemed greatly affected. Mean- 
 time God raised up two Quakers at Shaftsbury, who be- 
 came bound for my appearance at the quarter sessions. 
 I had been in prison but eight days, when one of these 
 came to fetch me out, and brought money to pay the 
 prison-fees, and all other expences. Had 1 not been put 
 in prison, it is likely some of those prisoners would ne- 
 ver have heard the gospel. I saw therefore, that God 
 did all things well. Being come back, I began preach- 
 ing again; and God was present with the people. I 
 soon received a letter from a gentleman at London, 
 bidding me employ two counsellors and an attorney, 
 and to draw upon him for whatever money 1 wanted. I 
 carried this letter to the post-master, and asked, if he 
 was willing to let me have money upon it? He said, 
 "Yes, as much as you please." This was soon noised 
 about town: so the magistrates were glad to make up the 
 matter. And the work of God so increased, that in a 
 little time we had eighty in society. 
 
 During my great distress of mind I went twice into 
 Ireland, as a travelling preacher; and in each passage 
 over the sea. I was very near being cast away. Octo- 
 ber 27, 1751, I preached at Mountmelick. The next 
 morning, after I had travelled about two miles, sudden- 
 ly my senses failed me. I was soon insensible where I 
 was, and where I came from. I supported myself a 
 considerable time, by a gale in the road; as I did not 
 know which way to go, nor what place to ask for. At
 
 MR. JOHN HAIME. 51 
 
 length my understanding returned, and I began to weep. 
 But what I passed through I cannot express, so un- 
 speakable was my anguish, But the tender mercy of 
 God sopported me therein, that my spirit might not fail 
 before him. 
 
 In the beginning of September, 1766, I wa3 living at 
 Shaftsbury, when Mr. Wesley passing through in his 
 way to Cornwall, I asked, if it would be agreeable for 
 me to be at his house in London a few days? He said, 
 "Yes, as long as you please;" but before 1 set out, Z re- 
 ceived the following letter: 
 
 "St. Ives, Cornwall, September 16, 1766. 
 "My dear Brother, 
 
 "J think you have no need to go to London. — God 
 has, it seems, provided a place for you here. Mr. Hos- 
 kins wants a worn-out preacher to live with him, to take 
 care of his family, and to pray with them morning and 
 
 iing." 
 
 I went down. As soon as Mr. Hoskins saw me, he 
 said, "You are welcome to stay here as long as you 
 live." But no sooner did I fix there, than 1 was, if 
 possible, ten times worse than before. In vain 1 strove 
 to make myself easy: the more I strove, the more mis- 
 erable I was; not that I wanted any thing which this 
 world can affiird. But can this world satisfy a soul, 
 that was made for God? The distress of my mind soon 
 became intolerable: it was a burden too heavy for me 
 to bear, it seemed to me. that unless I got some relief, I 
 must die in despair. One day I retired into the hall, 
 fell on my face, and cried for mercy; but got no ansuer. 
 I got up, and walked up and down the room, wringing my 
 hands, and crying like to break my heart; beg^in^ A 
 God, for Christ's sake, if there was any mercy -for me, 
 to help me. And biessed be his name, all .mi a sudden, 
 I found such a change through my s»ul and body a> js 
 past, description. I was afraid I should alarm 'he whole 
 house with the expressions of my J^y. i had a full wit- 
 ness from the Spirit <>f God, that 1 should not find that 
 bondage any more. Nor have I ever found it to this 
 day. Glory be to God for all his mercy. 
 
 But notwithstanding this- wonderful change. I had not 
 the faith which I had once. But 1 found a \ery -real 
 alteration in reading the Scriptures. The Promises to
 
 52 *XPERIEKCE or 
 
 me opened more and more, and I expected to find som» 
 great thing wrought upon me all at once. But God's 
 ways are nut as our ways, nor his thoughts as our 
 thoughts. He led me by a way I had not known. He 
 greatly deepened his work in my soul, and drove out 
 his enemies by little and little till I could clearly say, 
 "Thy will be done." The lion became a lamb, and I 
 found the truth of that word by happy experience. 
 Thou wilt keep his soul in perfect peace, whose mind is 
 stayed on Thee: 
 
 I now thought I would stay with Mr. Hoskins; for he 
 was very kind to me. But I soon began to be so bound 
 in spirit, that I could hardly pray in the family: nay, I 
 could not ask a blessing on our food, without much hesi- 
 tation and Btammering. And all the comforts of life, 
 which were then in great plenty, became altogether com- 
 fortless. Mr. Story bring then in the round, I made 
 my complaint to him. He told me, he would take my 
 place for a month, if I would spend that time in the cir- 
 cuit. This I gladly undertook; and although for the 
 ■.pace of three weeks, my coat was not once dry upon 
 my back, yet I was warmer within, and far more com- 
 fortable, than in the warm parlour. 
 
 When Mr. Story was gone, I thought I would stay 
 here a few days, and then travel. But the first night [ 
 was as restless as ever; so in the morning I took my 
 leave, and in January, 1767, went into the east of 
 Cornwall. I found it was good for me to be there: my 
 faith increased daily. And blessed be God, I found love, 
 and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost, springing up in 
 my soul. I trust God will continue them to my dying 
 day, and then receive me to himself. 
 
 I had long been travelling in the Wilderness, in a land 
 of deserts and pits, a land of drought and of Jhe shadow 
 of death. This has been my lot tor twenty yer,rs, a just 
 judgment of the Almighty for my sin. Blessed be his 
 name, that he did npt wholly cast me off! But I saw 
 clearly nothing would avail, but a fiesh application of 
 the Saviour's blood to my wounded soul. I had now a 
 happy sense of this: which, with the thoughts of his for- 
 bearing me twenty years before my conversion; his fill- 
 ing me with his love for three years; his dealings with 
 me in my fallen condition, and my present deliverance
 
 MK. JOHN HAIMJi. 5i 
 
 caused my soul to overflow with wonder and praise for 
 his long-suffering goodness. I saw nothing was too 
 hard for God ! I could cast myself on the Lord Jesus ! 
 All'tlte promises in the Scriptures were full of comfort: 
 particularly that: I have known thee in the furnace of 
 affliction. The Scriptures were all precious to my soul, 
 as the rain to the thirsty-land. And when Satan assault- 
 ed me afresh, I did not stand to reason with him, but 
 fled to the Lord Jesus for refuge. Hereby the snare 
 was soon broken and I found an increase both of Faith, 
 Hope, and Love. I could now truly say, The Lord is 
 my shepherd, therefore shall I lack nothing. He maketh 
 me to lie down in green pastures; He leadeth me beside 
 the still waters. He restoreth my soul; He leadeth m* 
 in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake. 
 
 It was not my intention ever to write any account of 
 these things, had not some of my friends greatly pres- 
 sed me thereto. Nevertheless I put it off from time to 
 time, being conscious I had no talent for writing, until 
 my peace was well nigh lost: at last I was prevailed up- 
 on to begin. I had not wrote many lines, before i 
 found my soul in perfect peace. I found myself like- 
 wise greatly assisted, to recollect the manifold dealings 
 of God with me: so that I have the greatest reason to 
 believe, it is his will I should make known, even by 
 these instances of his goodness, that he is {long-suffer- 
 ing, not willing that any should perish, but that all 
 should come to repentance. May he bless the feeble at- 
 tempt to the good of many! May they learn wisdom by 
 the things that I have suffered ! And be all the glory as- 
 cribed unto him that sitteth on the throne, and unto the 
 Lamb for ever.' 
 
 SOME months ago a sketch of my life was puhliihed 
 in the Arminian Magazine. But as the nature of that 
 work would not admit of a circumstantial account, 1 was 
 5 •
 
 54 experience of 
 
 obliged te omit many particulars, which may be usefui 
 to serious readers. This consideration, together with 
 the importunity of my friends, have induced me to en- 
 large the subject. 
 
 1 was born in the parish of St. Stephen, Brenwell, in 
 the county of Cornwall, about the beginning of August, 
 1722. 1 was the second son of Richard and Eliza Mur- 
 lin. I was sent to school when very young, where 
 I was taught to read, and to say my catechism, &c. 
 And, as my father feared God, he instructed his chil- 
 dren in the principles of religion, and caused us to at- 
 tend the church on the sabbath day. 
 
 As I was their youngest child, they indulged me too 
 much. The consequence was, self-will and passion 
 discovered themselves in me very soon. Sometimes I 
 disobeyed my parents ; and frequently quarrelled with 
 my eldest brother. I also swore and told lies; though 
 not so frequently as many children did. But, notwith- 
 standing this, even at this early period, I frequently had 
 serious thoughts of God and eternity; but they soon wore 
 off for want of more spiritual instruction. 
 
 As my father was a farmer, 1 was employed in that 
 business till I was near thirteen years of age. About 
 this time he died; and I have reason to believe died in 
 peace. 
 
 I was now desirous of learning the business of a car- 
 penter, and accordingly, at Michtelmas 1735, I was 
 bound to one, for seven years. My master living ut- 
 terly without God in the world : he was much given to 
 swearing, and taking God's name in vain; and I too 
 readily followed his example. He had a little estate of 
 his own, on which I was employed a great part of my 
 time; and, as he did not well understand his business 
 himself, 1 made but little progress therein. 
 
 At Michaelmas 1742, my apprenticeship ended. I 
 then went to work with another master, 'where I con- 
 tinued several years, and made considerable progress 
 both in my business and learning: applying myself in 
 .he day time to my trade, and in the evenings to writing 
 and accounts. 
 
 But all this time I was an enemy both to God and my 
 own soul. Indeed at times I had convictions of sin, and 
 some concern about my future state : but being sur-
 
 1IR. JOHN MURLIK. 55 
 
 rounded by those who had no thought of God, and hav- 
 ing no one to direct me, I quickly stifled my convictions 
 and became wor-e than before. To cursing and swear- 
 ing, 1 soon added gaming and drunkenness. Lord ! how 
 gieat is thy mercy in sparing those who live in such re- 
 bellion against thee ! 
 
 At this time my mother, who lived about seven miles 
 oft", heard Mie Methodists, who were instrumental in the 
 hand of Ghid in bringing her to the knowledge of the 
 truth. After she had feinted the good word of God, and 
 the powers of the world to come, she wrestled with the 
 Lord on my account, who in a short time heard and an- 
 swered her in the joy of her heart. 
 
 When I left my place, I returned home, and began 
 business for mygelf. I was then delivered from my old 
 companions, and by that means freed from many snares 
 and temptations, which before I was exposed to. 
 
 February, 1749, I heard the Methodists. The word 
 was attended with the demonstration of the spirit and 
 with power. By this means I was soon brought under 
 a deep conviction. The remembrance of my sins was 
 now grievous to me; and the burden of them was in- 
 tolerable. Jfy relations were sometimes afraid I should 
 lose my reason. I fasted and prayed much and often 
 thought that a burnt crust was too good for such a wretch 
 as me. The arrows of the Almighty stuck fast in me, and 
 his hand pressed me sore. I frequently kneeled at my 
 bedside, and wrestled with God in prayer till near mid- 
 night: and sometimes I was afraid to lie down in bed lest 
 I should awake in hell. At other times I fell on the 
 ground and roared for the very disquietness of mv heart. 
 Sometimes 1 was sorely tempted that the day of grace 
 was past; and that, though I sought, I should never find 
 mercy at the hand of God. I remember, one afternoon, 
 Satan was permitted to inject blasphemous thought.-s into 
 my mind to such a degree, that they greatly affected 
 both my body and mind. I felt something of that dis- 
 tress which David mentions in the 11 6th psalm : The 
 sorrows of death encompassed me : and the pains of hell 
 gat hold upon me: I found trouble and sorrow. Then 
 called I upon the name of the Lord $ O Lord, I beseech 
 thee, deliver my soul.' At other times, when I heard 
 the preachers speak of the love of Christ, and of his
 
 56' EXPERIENCE Of 
 
 willingness to save poor lo9t sinners, it fixed my con- 
 victions the deeper, to think I should be such a rebel 
 against so loving a Saviour ! Hi\t,blesse<l be God ! though 
 my convictions were very deep, they did not continue 
 long. 
 
 In April, I heard Mr. Downs preach on part of the 
 fifteenth chapter of St. Luke. He told us how willing 
 the Lord was to receive returning prodigals : under this 
 sermon I found a great deliverance. My burden was 
 taken away. And from that day, I never found that 
 distress I had felt before. But, as yet I was not fully 
 satisfied that my sins were forgiven. 
 
 After this I had a calm serenity in my soul, and often 
 much peace and joy : but I wanted a clearer manifesta- 
 tion of the pardoning love of God. And this he was 
 pleased to give me soon after, under the preaching of 
 Mr. Richard Trathan. 1 could then indeed say, O Lord 
 I will praise thee! though thou wast angry with me, 
 thine anger is turned away, and thou comfortest me. 
 Behold, God is my salvation : I will trust and not be 
 afraid: for the Lord Jehovah is my strength and my 
 song, he also is become my salvation. And although, 
 since then, I have met with sore trials, and sometimes 
 have been brought very low ; yet 1 have never lost my 
 confidence of thefavour of God, and trust I never shall. 
 
 Some time after this, Mi. William Roberts (then the 
 travelling preacher in our circuit) told me, "you must 
 take care of the little class." I was struck with fear, 
 and went out of the room, telling him, "I connot under- 
 take it." But he insisted on it; and as the people de- 
 sired I should, I at last complied, though with great re- 
 luctance ; for I thought there were some in the class 
 whose abilities were far superior to mine. 
 
 I then bought a large Bible, with some other book9, 
 and applied myself to prayer, and to reading the holy 
 Scriptures. And it pleased God to open my under- 
 standing more and more, to see the wondrous things 
 contained in his word. 
 
 About this time I was often beset by some disputa- 
 tious Anabaptists, who endeavoured to prove uncondi- 
 tional election. I generally stopt them short, by asking, 
 *'Do you believe absolute reprobation ? Do you think that 
 the merciful God did, from all eternity, appoint the great-
 
 MR. JOHM MURLIV. 57 
 
 est part of the human race to eternal damnation, with- 
 out any possibility of being saved ? If you believe that 
 he appointed the end, do you not believe that he also 
 appointed the means to bring them to it : and if so, do 
 you not make him the author of all the sin that ever was 
 committed ?" On their confessing that they did believe 
 this, I told them I could not be of their minds for se- 
 veral reasons. 
 
 First. Because ft would be unjust to appoint them to 
 sin, and then to punish them with everlasting fire for 
 fulfilling that appointment. 
 
 Secondly. Because it would impeach God's veracity, 
 who has positively asserted, that he will have all men 
 to he saved, and come to the knowledge of the truth : 
 more especially, seeing he condescends to confirm this 
 truth with an oath, swearing, As I live, I have no plea- 
 sure in the death of the wicked, but that the wicked turn 
 from his way and live. 
 
 Thirdly. Because if God inteaded that the greatest 
 part of the human race should unavoidably suffer eternal 
 torments, he would not have given his only begotten Son 
 to die for them : according to these declarations ; God 
 so loved the world that he gave his only begotten Son, 
 that whosoever believeth on him should not perish but 
 have everlasting life. And he is the propitiation for 
 oar sins: and not for ours only, but also for the sins of 
 he ichole world. 
 
 Fourthly. Beeause if he had intended to send the 
 greatest part of his helpless creatures to hell without a 
 possibility of being saved, he would not have sent his 
 spirit to convince the world of Sin, of righteousness, 
 and nf a Judgment to come: much less would the grace 
 of God that bringeth salvation have appeared to all men; 
 teaching them, that denying ungodliness and worldly 
 lusts, they should live soberly, righteously, and Godly in 
 this present world. Looking for that blessed hope, and 
 and the glorious appearing of the great God, and our Sa- 
 viour Jesus Christ. When they found that they could 
 not prevail, they went away and gave me no further 
 trouble. 
 
 After this I met my class constantly, to whom I some- 
 times gave a word of exhortation and never found my- 
 self more happy than when among the children of God.
 
 58 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 There were at this time in the neighbourhood several 
 local preachers : bur they had more places to preach at 
 on a Sabbath-day than they could possibly supply. One 
 of them, (Thomas Randall) came to me and said, "The 
 people are starving for want of bread : and can you 
 withhold it from them ? The Lord has put it into your 
 hand; but you are not a good stewart : otherwise you 
 would dispense to a!l their portion of meat in due 
 season." His words made a deep impression on my 
 mind ; for, before this, I had a conviction that it was 
 my duty to call sinners to repentance. And though I 
 put him off for the present, yet 1 could not shake oft' a 
 continual fear, lest 1 was burying my talent in the earth; 
 and should be condemned at last, as an unprofitable 
 servant. 
 
 Sometime after preaching had been appointed at a 
 neighbouring place : and no preacher was at liberty to go. 
 Word was sent t«> me, that if I did not go, the people 
 would be disappointed. I was then in a strait, and 
 knew not what to do. I prayed for direction, and then 
 came to this resolution, "I will go this once, and see 
 whether I am enabled to speak to the people or not ; so 
 shall I be better satisfied either to speak again, or to be 
 silent." Accordingly I took my horse and set out with 
 a trembling heart. When I came to the piace there 
 were more people than the house would contain : this ob- 
 liged me to preach in the open air : wen I stood up it was 
 with much fear and trembling. However, I gave out a 
 hymn, and went to prayer, wherein I found unexpected 
 liberty. I then read Actsiii, 19. "Repent ye, therefore, 
 and be converted, that your sins may be blotted out, 
 when the times of refreshing shall come from the pre- 
 sence of the Lord." The Lord set both my heart and 
 tongue at liberty, to declare his word. The people 
 heard not only with great attention ; but showers of 
 tears ran down many cheeks The good impressions 
 then made were not only deep, but lasting : for when 
 I was in Cornwall, in July 1777, so ne well remembered 
 what they had heatd between twenty and thirty years 
 before. 
 
 After this I laboured constantly as a local preacher. 
 And though my abilities were oo' large, yet God gave 
 me favour in the eyes of the people : and it pleased him
 
 M*R. JOHN MURLI.V. 
 
 59 
 
 to make the 'plain words I spoke, a blessing to many 
 souls. 
 
 At this time the world began to smile on me. Living 
 with my mother, my board cost me nothing : I got mo- 
 ney fast at my business ■ and had a rich uncle who ap- 
 peared to have a great regard for me : I had a good 
 horse to ride wherever I pleased and was happy in the 
 midst of in v Christian fiends. I also built me a house 
 in the parish of St. Me wan, in oider to fix my Taberna- 
 cle there. 
 
 Just then I received a letter from Mr. Wesley, en- 
 quiring if I was willing to be a travelling pieacher? 
 And if I was, desiring me to go into the west of Corn- 
 wall. I wrote back my objections: 1. That my aged 
 mother desired I would not leave her: 2. That not <»nly 
 my relations, but my Christian friends were unwilling 
 to' part with me : and 3. That though I might be of some 
 use among my neighbours, yet my abilities were not 
 equal to so great a work. Mr. Wesley fully answered 
 all my objections. I saw the things of this world, were 
 not worthy to be compared with the things of God : and 
 though my mother desired my company, she was not 
 dependent on me ; neither could I find any material 
 reason why I should not travel. So after a short strug- 
 gle in my mind, I resolved to give up all for Christ: 
 and, accordingly. October 12, 1754, I took my horse, 
 and without delay, went into the west of Cornwall. 
 Here I laboured till August 1755, with much satisfac- 
 tion ; And I hupe, the word was a blessing to many." 
 
 When the preachers who were appointed for Corn- 
 wall the ensuing year came, I left the county and la- 
 boured about six weeks in Devonshire. From thence I 
 r<>de to Bristol, where I spent a few weeks very agree- 
 ably. Then 1 set off for London, where (through mer- 
 cy) I safely arrived on the 30th of October, 1755. Here 
 1 received much benefit from the serious, loving con- 
 versation of our Christian friends : I also found a great 
 blessing in dispensing the word. But my stay here 
 was very short; for, in about a fortnight, [ set off for 
 Norwich : when I came Avithin sight of the city, I wept 
 over it, and lifted up my heart to God in prayer, that 
 he might bless my labours in that place, I believe the 
 IiOrd heard, and answered my prayer; for, though we
 
 60 KXPERIEXCE Of 
 
 were much persecuted, he was pleased to bless the word 
 of his grace to many souls. 
 
 I left Norwich on the 8th of February 1756, and came 
 to London on the 13th. Here, I again found a refuge 
 from the storm. After spending three months very 
 comfortably in and near London, I set off for Canterbu- 
 ry, where I met with a few friends who were Israelites 
 indeed ! In whose conversation I found great satisfac- 
 tion. Oh what a blessing it is to be with those who are 
 truly devoted to God ! I spent about six weeks here, 
 and at Dover, Sandwich, and a few other places, with 
 great pleasure and profit to my own soul ; and I hope 
 many others were piofited by my labours. The 10th of 
 July, I returned to London again, where I stayed about 
 three weeks, and on the 2d of August set off for Ports- 
 mouth, where I arrived safe on the 3d. After spending 
 six days here, I crossed over to the Isle of Wight, where 
 I found a few disciples at Newport, who had made 
 choice of God for their portion : especially three in one 
 house ; one of whom had been confined to her bed for 
 some years, but happy in God, and waiting for her dig- 
 solution. Oh how much better is it to dwell in the cot- 
 tage of Fanny Bevas with Christ, than to dwell in the 
 palace of Alexander or Nero, without him! After spend- 
 ing two nights on the Island, I returned to Portsmouth ; 
 and on the 13th took horse early in the morning, and 
 came to London the same evening. 
 
 The 19th of July 1757, I embarked at Dublin, and 
 landed at Parkgate on the 20th. After spending a few 
 days at Chester, I set off for the conference at London. 
 From theuce, 1 set off for Whitehaven, where I arrived 
 safe on the 3lst of August: here the Lord blest me 
 greatly both in my labours and in my own soul : many 
 sinners were convinced and converted, and the society 
 was much increased. Here I met with Benjamin Bigg, 
 who travelled with me three or four years. He was a 
 favourite servent of the old Sir James Lowther, and 
 was the only person in the room when his master died. 
 Sir William, the next heir to Sir James, left my friend 
 fifty pounds a year for life, which he spent in doing 
 good. 
 
 The 20th of April 1758, I embarked with my compan- 
 ion for Liverpool ; but the captain of the vessel deceiv-
 
 MR. JOHN MUULIN. 61 
 
 edhis passengers, and carried us all to the Isle of Man, ' 
 where we stayed a week. The second evening I 
 preached in a large barn ; but on Sabbath it would not 
 * contain the congregation, so I was obliged to preach 
 abroad. The people in general behaved well and gave 
 great attention. After I left the island, some of them 
 sent to Whitehaven, desiring to have another preacher. 
 But it was some years before another was sent ; there 
 being so little probability of doing any considerable good 
 while the whole island was a nest of smugglers. The 
 duke of Athol was then king of the island, but the case 
 is now altered ; for since it has been purchased ef the 
 duke and united to the crown of England, that detest- 
 able trade is rooted out : a considerable part of the 
 island is cultivated : at one part of it, a herring fishery 
 is established : at another, a large linen manufactory. 
 And now we see the fruit of our labours there in the 
 conversion of many sinners to God. 
 
 After we had been in the island above a week, we 
 embarked again for Liverpool ; from thence we hasten- 
 ed on, and got to Bristol the 9th of August, in time for 
 the conference. 
 
 When the conference ended, I laboured in the Wilt- 
 shire circuit with great satisfaction, till January, 1759. 
 I then received a letter from Mr. Wesley, who desired 
 me to hasten to Norwich with all speed ; for he had ta- 
 ken the charge of the late Mr. Wheatley'3 tabernacle, 
 and people; and a charge it was indeed! for many of 
 Wheatly's dear lambs were little better than wolves. — 
 Some who were sincere among them joined with our so- 
 ciety ; some of them joined with William Cudworth, 
 the Antinomian ; and some met with one Elcey Good. 
 I then clearly saw the dreadful consequences, which 
 attended the doctrine of such preachers : their hearers 
 were not converted to God, and their lives were a scan- 
 dal to the gospel of Christ. What from outward perse- 
 cutions, and the irregular lives of professors, I met with 
 many trials the three months I stayed there ; yet the 
 Lord was my support, and before I left them, things ap- 
 peared to wear a brighter aspect. Many of the triflers 
 had left us, and others had joined in their stead : and 
 in general we had a serious congregation. 
 
 6
 
 62 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 I stayed at Norwich from the SOth of January till the 
 beginning of May, and on the 4th, I went to Colchester, 
 where I stayed a few months, and came back to London 
 on the Mh of November. This was like putting into ( 
 harbour after a severe storm. But alas ! 'here we have 
 no continuing city.' Oh that we may seek one to come, 
 "whose builder and maker is God !' 
 
 December 11th, I left London again, and came to 
 Canterbury on the 12th, and laboured near three months 
 in the Kent circuit, with much satisfaction. Just as I 
 was going to leave that city, a widow gentlewoman of 
 considerable fortune made her case known to Mr.Lepine, 
 and told him she would be very glad if I would call and 
 take a breakfast with her. Mr. Lepine brought the mes- 
 sage, and accordingly I called on her, and we had some 
 conversation together on a subject of a very serious na- 
 ture ; and though I intended to alter my state, if I 
 could meet with a suitable companion, yet, on mature 
 deliberation, I found she was not the person with whom 
 1 could be happy. My chief reason was, a fear that she 
 was not devoted to God. 
 
 On the 28th of February, 1760, I returned to Lon- 
 don again. I found it once more a place of rest; for 
 here 1 had only to preach night and morning, without 
 taking charge of the society. Here were also many 
 helps to bring us forward in our spiritual journey. Here 
 I could live and die : but thy will be done. 
 
 I left London in April, and on the 26th arrived at 
 Bedford. While I stayed here, I had a severe fever, 
 which I hope was a profitable school ; I could say it was 
 good for me that I was afflicted. The apothecary pour- 
 ed in his drugs; but I was almost burnt up with thirst, 
 and wanted a good draught ot water, which 1 could not 
 obtain, till one night after most of the family were in 
 bed, 1 prevailed with the servant girl to set a bottle by 
 my bedside. 1 took a hearty draught and fell into a 
 sweat, and by the next evening (through mercy) 1 was 
 able to preach. 
 
 On the 28th of may I returned to London again, and 
 through a kind providence got acquainted with Mrs. 
 Elizabeth Berrisford, whom I visited several times 
 while I stayed in town. And I hope our visits were 
 profitable: we seldom parted without prayer.
 
 MR. JOHN MURLIK. 63, 
 
 In August, Mr. Jones, Mr. Hampson, and I, set off for 
 Bristol. Having been absent from my friends above 
 five years, I had a desire to pay them a visit; so, after 
 the conference, I went with Mr. Wesley to Cornwall. 
 After I had spent a little time at home, I continued to 
 labour in the east of Cornwall with much satisfaction 
 till February, 1761. 
 
 I then received a letter from Mr. Wesley, desiring 
 me to hasten away to my old station at Norwich. So I 
 had a journey to take between three and four hundred 
 miles in the dead of winter. However, I set off, and 
 reached Norwich the 14th of march. Here I continued 
 till August, and laboured with more satisfaction, and 
 more success than I had the year before. 
 
 After our conference I went into Sussex, where I 
 met with a young clergyman whom God had called out 
 of darkness into his marvellous light. But as there is 
 no communion between light and darkness, his rector 
 soon differed with him. He then joined the Methodists, 
 and since that time has laboured as a faithful servant in 
 his master's vineyard. 
 
 November the 9th, I came back to London, and con- 
 tinued in town four months. On the 11th of February 
 1762, (after near two years acquaintance) I was mar- 
 ried to Mrs. Elizabeth Berrisford. She has proved a 
 faithful companion, and travelled with me through a great 
 part of this kingdom, and has rather been a spur than a 
 hindrance to me in the work of the ministry. Lord, 
 reward her a thousand fold in her own bosom ! 
 
 On the 10th of April we set. off in the stage tor Bed- 
 ford. When we came within a few miles of the place, 
 one of the horses dropped down and died in a few mi- 
 nutes. How uncertain is life, either in man or beast! 
 While we were in those parts, I visited Towcester, 
 Whittlebury, and some other places, and found a bles- 
 sing among those simple honest hearted people. 
 
 We returned to London again on the 3rd of May, 
 where we stayed about six weeks, and then set oft* once 
 more for Norwich, where we arrived safe on the 19th 
 of June. Here I generally preached twice, sometimes 
 thrice a day ; besides meeting the society, visiting the 
 sick, &c. But, Lord, what hast thou done to save sin- 
 ners ! What' hast thou done to save me !
 
 64 EXVERIKNCE OF 
 
 We stayed at Norwich above four months, and return- 
 ed to London on the 3d of November. The 19th we 
 set off again to visit our friends in Oxford and Buck- 
 inghamshire, and the Lord was very gracious to me in 
 this journey. On Tuesday, December the 7th, as I 
 was going from High Wicornbe to Epistone, I called at 
 a farm-house to enquire the road : the mistress who di- 
 rected me, went in and told the family there was a Me- 
 thodist preacher gone to Mrs. Clark's, The master of 
 the house, with his son and daughter, the man and maid 
 servant, in a short time set off to hear the preacher. 
 On the road the master said if the man does not speak 
 good sense, I will confound him before the people. 
 When they came into the house they could not sit toge- 
 ther for laughing. I preached on Rom. viii. 9. "Now, if 
 any man have not the spirit of Christ, he is none of his." 
 The Lord was pleased to send the word with pawer 
 to all their hearts. Their laughiDg was turned into 
 mourning, and their joy into heaviness ; so they return- 
 ed home with broken and contrite hearts. Some time 
 after, when the master was on his death bed, he sent for 
 a preacher to pray with him, and I hope he is now in par- 
 adise. Afterwards Mrs. Clark had preaching in her 
 house, and I believe it continues there to this day. Lord, 
 let them all be found at thy right hand in the great 
 day of accounts ! 
 
 On December 15th, we returned to London again, 
 where we continued till the 5th of March, 1763. 
 
 We then set off for Canterbury, I was much blest in 
 my own soul the two months 1 stayed in this circuit : 
 and 1 hope the Lord made his word a blessing to manv. 
 On the 1st of April, being Good-Friday, I preached on 
 John xix. 5. ''Behold the man !" My heart was melted 
 down with love to my Redeemer, who had suffered death 
 upon the cross for our redemption: 1 was exceedingly hap- 
 py in my own soul, and 1 believe many found a remark- 
 able blessing that evening. The next night, being Eas- 
 ter-eve, 1 dreampt I saw Christ on the cross and the 
 wound of the spear in his breast; to which wound 1 
 saw one fly for consolation. 1 then thought he came 
 down from the cross and stood on the ground, with his 
 servant Moses on his left hand. 1 then began to exa- 
 mine myself whether 1 was sincere or not, and thought 1
 
 MR. JOHN MURLfN. 65 
 
 could appeal to him, that it was my desire to do his w ill 
 Yet 1 was conscious that if he was to mark iniquity, he 
 couid find cause enough to condemn me. 1 then thought 
 1 went towards him weeping, and confessing my sins. 
 As 1 went forward begging for mercy, 1 thought his mer- 
 ciful eye overlooked them all. 
 
 The 4th of may we returned to London, where we 
 stayed two months, and then set off for Norwich again, 
 and arrived safe the 2d of July. Here 1 continued in 
 my old station till the 31st of October, and the Lord 
 blest my labours with a measure of success. On the 2d 
 of November we oame to London once more, where we 
 continued till the 7th of February, 1764. Then we set 
 off again, and on Friday, the 10th, came to Salisbury. 
 The Lord was very gracious to me in this journey. 
 On Sabbath the 12th, 1 preached in the evening from 
 Hosea ii. 16. "Thou shalt call him lshi." The Lord 
 blest the word to the good of many ; one young man in 
 particular was then justified, and ever since has been 
 an ornament to his profession. 
 
 On Wednesday, the 15th, we arrived safe at Bristol, 
 where 1 loboured with much satisfaction above five 
 months. Here the people are established in Religion, 
 and many of them much devoted to God. Our confer- 
 ence this yeir was in this city, in the beginning of Au- 
 gust : after which, Mr. Wesley had proposed to visit the 
 societies in Devonshire and Cornwall ; but having a 
 sudden call to London, he desired me to supply his 
 place. This 1 did willingly: and the more so, as my 
 wife had never seen my relations. Accordingly, I set 
 off on Monday, the 13th, and preached at Limpson that 
 night. Tuesday the 14th, 1 preached at Taunton, and 
 on Wednesday the 15th, at Collumpton. Here 1 met 
 my old friend Mr. William Roberts : what pity that a 
 man of such eminent abilities should be confined to so 
 narrow a sphere ! On Thursday the 1 6th, 1 preached at 
 Exeter. On Friday 17th, we met several of our friends 
 on the road who came from Plymoutk-Dock, expecting 
 to meet Mr. Wesley. They returned with us, and as 
 soon as 1 came to the Dock, 1 went immediately to the 
 preaching-house, which was quite full of people : and 
 though they were disappointed in the instrument, our 
 Lord did not disappoint us: for he crowned our as'sera- 
 6 *
 
 66 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 bly with his presence. 1 preached again on Saturday 
 the 18th, and twice the next day. Here 1 met with 
 John Trembath, once an eminent preacher, and an in- 
 strument for good to thousands! but now miserable in 
 his own mind, and, 1 fear, a slave to sin ! 'Oh, how are 
 the mighty fallen, and the weapons of war perished I' 
 Shall he, after preaching to others, become a cast- way 
 himself? Rather let him once more awake, and strive 
 to save his own soul, with those who have heard him ! 
 
 After morning preaching on Monday the 20th, we set 
 off, crossed Saltash passage, and went on to John Bunt's, 
 near Leskard, where we lodged that night. Tuesday 
 the 21st, we arrived safe at St. Austle, where we were 
 met by my mother and uncle , who were glad to see me 
 and their new relation. After preaching, we went 
 home with my mother, where 1 left my wife the next 
 day, and set off to supply those places where Mr. Wes- 
 ley was expected. The congregations were very large 
 in most places. 1 rejoiced to see many of my old ac- 
 quaintance still travelling in the road to Zion, and 
 found sweet communion with God in this journey. 
 
 Wednesday, September 12th, 1 returned home, and 
 after visiting a few societies in the neighbourhood, we 
 took our leave of our friends. Oh that we may all meet 
 on the mount of God, where pain and parting shall be no 
 more ! 
 
 Monday the 17th, we set off for Port-Isaac, and after 
 visiting the societies on the western-coast, we came to 
 Bristol on Thursday the 27th, where we stayed a few 
 days ; and on Monday October 1st, we set off again, and 
 arrived safe in London on Thursday, the 11th. We 
 epent about three months in town ; but this is not our 
 resting place ; Lord, bring us safe at last, where the 
 weary are at rest ! 
 
 On Tuesday, January 15, we set off for Leeds, visit- 
 ing the societies as we went along. On Thursday 24th, 
 we came to Sheffield, where Mr. Wesley desired me to 
 stay a few weeks, in order to still the mob, if it was 
 possible. 1 hope my stay here was of use, as the perse- 
 cution was much abated before 1 went away. 
 
 March 8th, we came to Leeds. I laboured in this 
 circuit with much satisfaction for five months. It being 
 a remarkable dry summer, the pastures were almost"
 
 MR. JOHN MURLIN. 67 
 
 burnt up, and the cattle ready to perish for want. 1 ap- 
 pointed Friday, August 2d, for a day of fasting and 
 prayer, by the societies of that circuit. We met at 
 five o'clock in the morning, again at eight, at one, and 
 seven in the evening. When we came out from prayer 
 at eight o'clock in the morning, our gracious Father sent 
 a few gentle diops on the earth. At one o'clock we 
 met again, and 1 expounded Deuteronomy xi. 13. and 
 the following verses. When we came out we had a 
 gentle shower. After the evening service, the heavens 
 grew black with cloudy and when we got up the next 
 morning, the earth was greatly refreshed with rain, 
 which continued to fall upon it. This proved a bles- 
 sing to many souls, when they saw such a remarkable 
 answer to prayer. Elijah sent his servant seven times 
 before the rain came ; but the Lord was pleased to an- 
 swer us on the second time. Whenever 1 think of that 
 day, my heart melts with gratitude to God, for his great 
 condescension in answering the prayers of his feeble 
 and unworthy children. 
 
 This year there was a greater fall of snow in York- 
 shire than had been known in the memory of man. It 
 began on Tuesday, February the 11th, and continued 
 till Friday the 14th. 1 was confined at Huddersfield all 
 this time ; when it ceased, 1 attempted to return to Bir- 
 stal ; but when 1 came about half way, going up Mur- 
 field Moor, 1 could not find the causeway. The snow 
 was so deep that it reached above my knees. The horse 
 could not walk; but was forced to plunge, and was rea- 
 dy to fall upon me. 1 then thought 1 should be buried 
 in the snow. Being quite spent, and seeing a few cot- 
 tages at a distance, 1 called for heip. A man opened 
 his door, and looked on me awhile, then turned in a^ain, 
 and shut his door after him, and left me in that situa- 
 tion. Not being able to go on, 1 continued to call for 
 help; at last two young men came out of another cot- 
 tage who knew wheie the causeway lay. One of them 
 led my horse, and I followed after. 1 was glad to give 
 them a shilling to (ake me to the top of the moor. 1 had 
 two or three guides after that, and at last, through a 
 kind Providence, 1 got to Gumersal, within one mile of 
 Birstal ; but the narrow lanes being filled with snow 1 
 could go no farther. At last 1 got to Mr. Rhodes's house,
 
 68 EXPEIUENCE OF 
 
 who took care both of man and beast. When 1 got up 
 the next morning 1 saw the neighbours carrying home a 
 dead person. He was a strong man and had not walk- 
 ed much above half a mile; and was but little above a 
 stone's cast from his own house. Good Lord, hitherto thou 
 hast preserved me, for which 1 desire to return thee my 
 unfeigned thanks ! 
 
 Friday, April 3, 1767, by the desire of the countess 
 of Huntingdon, 1 set off for Brightelmstone, where 1 
 continued three weeks. While 1 was here, 1 received a 
 letter which gave me an account of my mother's death, 
 who died calling upon the Lord. She had known the 
 Lord about nineteen or twenty years, and had adorned 
 the gospel from the time of her conversion. As she had 
 always been a very kind mother, but more especially so 
 ever since she had known the grace of God, 1 was con- 
 cerned for the loss of such a parent; but, on the other 
 hand, when 1 considered that she was gone to her re- 
 ward, 1 found great joy and thankfulness. May hex- 
 children continue to tread in her steps, that we may 
 rejoice together before the throne to all eternity ! 
 
 On Friday, 24th, 1 set off in the stage coach for Corn- 
 wall, to settle some temporal affairs, which 1 complete- 
 ed, and returned again to the conference. 
 
 From hence 1 went into Bristol circuit, where we had 
 a remarkable increase of the work of God ; especially 
 at Kingswood. 1 added above a hundred and sixty 
 members to that single society; most of whom found 
 peace with God. When God teacheth, there is no de- 
 lay in learning. It was astonishing to hear the poor 
 colliers in prayer ! They prayed with such simplicity 
 and fervour, as was enough to melt a heart of stone. 
 Children also were frequently heaid crying to the Lord 
 to convert their parents, that they might not go down 
 with grey hairs and sorrow to the grave ! And thirteen 
 or fourteen children at the school were enable to rejoice 
 in God their Saviour. But which of these will endure 
 to the end ? 
 
 Friday, February 10, 1769, after preaching at our 
 chapel in West street, Miss Lee (of Wolverhampton) 
 told me, that near five years ago, she had heard me 
 preach at Bristol, when the Lord was pleased to send
 
 MR. JOHN MURLIN. 
 
 69 
 
 the word wiih power to her heart. From that time she 
 never rested till she had found peace with God. She 
 said, she was then spoiled for good company, as the 
 world calls it ! Her mother and friends at first thought 
 she was going mad ; but after awhile, he mother became 
 nearly as mad as herself; for she also began to cry for 
 mercy, and to attend the preaching of the word at every 
 opportunity. May they both endure to the end, that 
 they may be saved ! 
 
 Wednesday, April 19, Mr. Charles Greenwood invi- 
 ted me to a feast, provided for the poor, the maimed, the 
 halt, and the blind. After dinner, 1 sung a hymn, gave 
 an exhortation, and went to prayer. The poor seemed 
 much affected, and were thankful for food and advice, 
 as well as for the money Mr. Greenwood gave them. 
 O ! that all who have it in their power would follow his 
 example ! that when the Redeemer shall appear on his 
 great white throne, he may say unto them also, 1 was 
 hungry and ye gave me meat ; 1 was thirsty and ye gave 
 me drink ; 1 was naked and ye clothed me : — therefore, 
 come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom pre- 
 pared for you from the foundation of the world. 
 
 Monday 27, after preaching at five o'clock in the 
 morning at Brentford, one of our friends took me in his 
 boat up the river, as far as Richmond. As I saw the 
 fishermen draw their net to shore, who after toiling all 
 night, had caught nothing, 1 cried out blessed Jesus 
 give me more success, as fisher of men ! Do thou always 
 stand on the shore, and direct me to cast the net on the 
 right side, that 1 may enclose a multitude for thyself. 
 
 The houses and gardens on each side the river, ap- 
 peared pleasantly situated, and at the top of Richmond 
 hill, we had a very fine prospect. But 1 observed here 
 and there, a hatchment hung out, as a token of mortality! 
 Oh cruel death ! cannot the rich, the mighty, the hon- 
 ourable inhabitants of these stately mansions forbid thy 
 entrance, or escape thy dart ? May 1 have a building of 
 God, a house, not made with hands, eternal in the hea- 
 
 vens ! 
 
 Wednesday, June 7, 1 read some of Dr. Richard Lu- 
 cas's sermons on death, judgment, and a future state; 
 and found it profitable to consider myself standing at 
 the bar of God, surrounded with dissolving nature ! the
 
 70 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 world flaming ! the trumpets sounding ! armies of an- 
 gels attending! rocks and mountains falling! light- 
 nings flashing; thunders rolling! devils howling ! and 
 the judge sitting on his Gre^t White Throne ! Lord! 
 create in me a clean heart, and renew a right spirit 
 within me, that 1 may be fully prepared for that great 
 day ! 
 
 Tuesday 20lh, 1 preached at the Foundry, to a large 
 congregation, many of whom appeared to be deeply af- 
 fected : the Lord also blest my own soul. 1 preached 
 again at five o'clock the next morning ; after which 1 
 was much afflicted with a pain in my breast, and spit- 
 ting of blood. 1 believe the cause was, preaching con- 
 stanly twice a day, besides meeting the societies, and 
 visiting the sick. In such cases 1 am often at a loss to 
 know the will of God. 1 would not spare myself, nei- 
 ther would 1 imprudently throw my life away. But if I 
 must err, let it be on the safe side ! 'Whatever 1 suffer, 
 the few days 1 remain on earth, let me not be numbered 
 among the slothful servants !' 
 
 Saturday, July 22, 1769, we set off for the North, and 
 lodged at Hertford that night. The next day 1 heard a 
 sermon at church ; but 1 heard not one word either of 
 God, or Christ, or death, or judgment, or heaven, or 
 hell. If this is the gospel that people hear, what won- 
 der that so many of them are without Christ, and with- 
 out hope, and without God in the world ! 
 
 After visiting the societies on the road, we came to 
 Leeds, on Saturday, the 29th. Our conference began 
 here, Tuesday, August the 1st. The Lord was with us 
 of a truth, and gave us a remarkable blessing at parting. 
 
 Saturday the 19th, as 1 was going to the preaching- 
 house in Sunderland, I saw a poor drunkard, so much 
 intoxicated that he could not walk alone : he had liter- 
 ally been wollowing like a sow in the mire. He at- 
 tempted to swear, but could not speak plain : two of his 
 companions led him to his own door, and as he was at- 
 tempting to go down a pair of stone stairs, (for he lived 
 in a cellar) he fell, and fractured his skull : he lay six 
 hours after, but never spoke another word ; and in this 
 condition went to appear before a Holy God ! 
 
 At a village called Oldham, about seven miles from 
 Manchester, (a place famous through all that country
 
 MR. JOHN MURLIN. 71 
 
 for daring and desperate wickedness) we had heavy per- 
 secution for a season. As I was going to preach in the 
 street one Sabbath-day, two constables, with a great 
 mob at their heels, took me into custody, for riotous be- 
 haviour, in singing about two verses of a hymn, as the 
 people were coming out of church. They took me to a 
 public house, and kept me all night. The constables 
 and their assistants were soon special drunk, and began 
 to quarrel with each other. From words they soon went 
 to blows. The house where we were, belonged to the 
 clerk of the parish, whose son thinking me ill used, took 
 my part. One of the constables took him by the collar, 
 on which he wrested the staff out of the drunken con- 
 stable's hand, and broke his head with it. 
 
 The next day I was taken before ajustice, and bound 
 over to the quarter sessions. But 1 traversed and had 
 it tried at the assizes ; from thence the cause was sent 
 back to the quarter sessions, where it was given against 
 me. While the jury were determining to find me guil- 
 ty, one of them, a plain simple countryman, took an op- 
 portunity to slip out of court, because (as he said after- 
 wards) he could not in conscience say, that singing a 
 hymn, with a peaceable multitude, was breeding a riot. 
 From the beginning to the end of this affair, my soul 
 was kept in peace : and as to my persecutors, 1 only 
 wished that they might be turned from darkness to 
 light, and from the power of Satan unto God, that they 
 might receive forgiveness of sins, and an inheritance 
 among them which are santified by faith that is in 
 Christ. 
 
 After 1 had left those parts, 1 was glad to hear that the 
 word of God had taken effect among the sinners of Old- 
 ham : that many of them were turned from the evil of 
 their ways; that they had found peace with God; and 
 that in a short time they built themselves a chapel, 
 where they now peaceably assemble to worship God in 
 spirit and truth. 1 also hear that there is a great re- 
 formation in other places in that neighbourhood. O 
 Lord ! thus let thy kingdom come with power, and pre- 
 vail against the kingdom of darkness in every place. 
 
 Monday, July 19th, 1773, we left Manchester. I 
 preached that evening at Macclesfield. The house was 
 quite crouded with attentive hearers ; 1 believe most of
 
 72 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 them were much affected, as they were either mourning 
 after, or rejoicing in God. 
 
 Tuesday the 20th, we came to Ashborn, in the Peak 
 of Derbyshire, and not knowing any friends in the town, 
 we called at an inn ; but 1 was soon found out, and de- 
 sired to preach in the street, which 1 immediately did, 
 on Romans viii. 13. to a very attentive congregation. 
 The landlady of the inn behaved remarkably civil : we 
 then setoff, and I preached that evening at Derby. 
 
 Wednesday the 2lst, I preached at Loughborough; 
 also on Thursday the 22d, at 5 o'clock in the morning. 
 At noon I preached at Mountsorrel, and in the evening 
 at Leicester. 1 bless God, 1 had a present reward in 
 preaching; my own soul was abundantly refreshed 
 while 1 was speaking to others. The three following 
 days 1 spent comfortably with the little society at North- 
 ampton, and on Tuesday the 27th, came to London. 
 This year 1 laboured in London with Mr. Bumstead and 
 Mr. Atlay. But though 1 was comfortably situated, in 
 many respects, 1 was not without various trials. In- 
 deed, 1 have always found that sweets and bitters, com- 
 fort* and trials, when blended together by the hand of a 
 wise and gracious God, have not only been best for me, 
 but obsolutely necessary in this world of danger. And 
 so 1 found it this year. For 1 hope 1 can say, all thing6 
 worked together for good to my own soul ; and that, so 
 far from hindering, rather promoted my usefulness 
 among the people. And thus 1 have found it ever since. 
 Therefore, O Lord, not as I will, but as thou wilt ! Thou 
 knowest what is best for me at all times and under all 
 circumstances. Make me then the object of thy con- 
 stant care, so shall I be safe from danger while on earth , 
 and praise thee to all eternity. 
 
 Sabbath, December the 18th, 1 was desired to preach a 
 funeral sermon for Mrs. Hall, late wife of Mr. John 
 Hall, of Bedminster, by whom she had several children. 
 She was a tender mother, a loving and obedient wife, 
 one who constantly attended on the means of grace, and 
 adorned her profession in her life and conversation. 
 
 As she was one day in the market, she was instantly 
 deprived of her speech and the use of her limbs. She 
 was carried into her brother's house, where she was vi- 
 sited by several of her friends. After awhile her speech
 
 MR. JOHiff MURLIK, i i» 
 
 was restored, so that she was able to declare the good- 
 ness of G<»d. She would not speak about the things of 
 this world ; but told us, she was happy in the Redeem- 
 er's Love. She lay a few days, and then returned in 
 triumph to God. 
 
 Though she was very comely in her life time, yet she 
 appeared far more so after her death. When the spirit 
 took its flight, it left the heavenly stamp on her face. 
 Her brother (Mr. William Wait) was so much affected 
 with the sight, that he could scarce look on her. She 
 brought to my mind that verse in one of our funeral 
 hymns : 
 
 Ah lovely appearance of death ! 
 
 No sight upon earth is so fair : 
 Not all the guy pageant's that breathe 
 
 Can with a dead body compare : 
 With solemn delight I survey 
 
 The corpse when the spirit is fled, 
 In love with the beautiful clay, 
 
 And longing to lie in its stead. 
 I preached her funeral sermon the next Sabbath day* 
 The house was quite crowded with attentive hearers, 
 and our Lord crowned the assembly with his presence; 
 we shared in the joy of our departed friend, and had an 
 anticipation of the celestial banquet. 
 
 Some time after this we began to preach at the lime- 
 kilns, near Bristol. We went there every Thursday 
 night. By this means, several were convinced of sin and 
 converted to God. I joined about twenty of them in so- 
 ciety in one eight. They were quite in earnest while 
 I continued in those parts, and I am informed continue 
 the same to this day. Lord, help them to endure to 
 the end, that we may all rejoice at thy right hand, when 
 thou comest in the clouds of heaven. 
 
 This year another friend of mine (Mrs. Elizabeth 
 Rose) died. She was a sensible woman, and had adorn- 
 ed the gospel for many years. 1 visited her in her last 
 illness. And as nothing had passed through her for se- 
 veral days, she felt the most excruciating pain. She was 
 never heard to murmur ; but was quite resigned to the 
 will of God. When I saw her, she brought to my mind 
 a saying of Seneca, "That a philo9pher contending 
 with, and getting above the misery of human life, was a 
 sight fit to invite the gods to be spectators." And 
 7
 
 ~4 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 may we not say, that God and angels look down with 
 great satisfaction on a christian, triumphing over pain 
 and the fear of death ? Even so died this gracious woman 
 after eight or ten days illness, and is now added to the 
 number of those who praise God and the Lamb for ever- 
 more. 
 
 This year also Abraham Peacock, of Kingswood, died. 
 And as I have reason to believe that I was instrumental 
 in his conversion, and had him under my care at the 
 time of his death ; it may not be judged improper to sub- 
 join a brief account of him in this place. 
 
 About thirty years ago, being a collier, he and several 
 others were shut up in a pit, by the water of on old mine 
 breaking in upon them. The whole country being alarm- 
 ed, abundance of men set to work and drew out the 
 water. The prisoners were confined eleven days before 
 they were delivered, in which time they eat their can- 
 dles, chewed their shoe-leather, and drank waterj which, 
 by a kind Providence, preserved their lives. But all this 
 had no good effect on Abraham, for he still continued a 
 most vile and abandoned profligate. 
 
 Sometime after this, he entered on board a ship bound 
 for Jamaica. The ship was cast away, and he and se- 
 veral of the crew escaped to a rock, where they were con- 
 fined six days. Then, through a kind Providence, an 
 English vessel came by and took them in, and brought 
 them home to England. Abraham then went to his old 
 employment ; but continued a rebel against God. About 
 seven years ago, when we had that glorious revival in 
 Kingswood, he was told how happy the people were who 
 met together to pray, and sing praises to God. " Why 
 then," said Abraham, "I will go and hear them." When 
 he came, the word reached his stubborn heart, and he 
 was brought into deep convictions. But one night, when 
 he was in bed, the Lord removed his load, and set his 
 soul at liberty. He arose and came away to the school 
 about midnight, and called Mr. Hindmarsh. He then 
 told him, "1 believe I am going to die, for the Lord has 
 forgiven all my sins." After this he had a very poor 
 state of health, and was not able to work. By this 
 means he soon became so exceeding low in his circum- 
 stances, thathehad neither bread to eat, nor abed to lie 
 upon. I mentioned his case to a few friends in Bristol.
 
 MR. JOHN MURLIN. 
 
 75 
 
 and among us we procured him a bed and other neces- 
 saries. For seven years he continued a great monument 
 both of sufferings and of patience, and then died in peace. 
 Oh the riches, both of the wisdom and goodness of G>>d! 
 How abundantly were they displayed in the case of this 
 poor man, who had spent between fifty and sixty years 
 in a regular course of daring wickedness; and that God 
 should not only preserve him amidst it all, but at last 
 convert his soul, provide for his body, and then take 
 him to himself, to behold his face in righteousness, and 
 to praise him to all eternity ! 
 
 The two years I stayed in and about Bristol, I had 
 full employment. For," besides riding often ten, twelve, 
 fifteen or twenty miles a day, through all weathers, I 
 had to preach frequently twice a day, and sometimes 
 thrice, besides meeting the societies in various ways, 
 visiting the sick, &c. which 1 found to be very weari- 
 some to flesh and blood. But when I considered what 
 a charge I had, having near fifteen hundred souls put 
 under my care, exclusive of all the thousands who heard 
 me continually ; more especially when I considered that 
 each of these souls was of more value than ten thou- 
 sand worlds : all within me cried out. who is sufficient 
 for these things ! And I could scarce refrain from saving 
 with him of old, Lord send by whom thou wilt, only 
 send not by me! And I hope I shall never lose sight of the 
 greatness of this undertaking, or the awfulness of the 
 charge committed unto me : but, rather, that I shall see 
 and feel more and more of its great and tremendous 
 importance every day of my life . that I may be more 
 serious and humble, more upright aud earnest before 
 him who hath called me to this work, and before whom 
 1 shall shortly stand to give an account of my steward- 
 ship! 
 
 Friday, July 19, 1775, we left Bristol, and spent ab out 
 a week with our friends in Bath. Here we never had 
 much, if any prospect of doing any great good till verv 
 lately. This year I added several new members, and 
 manv others found peace and joy in the Holy Ghost. 
 When we left Bath, we called on a few societies in our 
 way, and came to London on Monday the 29th. This 
 year I laboured in much peace with Mr. Hindmarsh and 
 Mr. Pilmoor. When we are free from outward trouble,
 
 • t» EXPERIENCE Of 
 
 there is danger lest we should fall into a lukewarm state, 
 If we desire to live holy and happy, we should keep 
 God and eternity always in view. 
 
 Wednesday. June 4, 1777, we left London, and went 
 into the west of England. Providence was very kind to 
 us in this journey. As we were going off Salisbury 
 Plain, I got out of the chaise to walk down a very steep 
 hill ; when we came to the bottom, as I was going in 
 again, between my wife and me we dropt the reins, 
 which hung on the horse's heels; this made him set oft' 
 in full gallop, which he continued for near a mile, with 
 both of us in the chaise. He then turned off the road 
 through a narrow gate way leading to an inn, as if guid- 
 ed in every step by an invisible hand. The inn-yard 
 was very narrow, that he could neither turn to the right 
 nor left, and the stable fronting, he was obliged to stop. 
 
 God.' surely thou didst then give thine angels charge 
 to watch over thy poor servants who put their trust in 
 thee. After we had breakfasted here, we set off again, 
 and went on through the societies to Cornwall, where I 
 spent about five weeks with great satisfaction. In many 
 places the congregations were so large that I was obliged 
 to preach abroad. I found my soul was much blest. I 
 rejoiced to see many of my old acquaintance and coun- 
 trymen walking in the way to heaven. 
 
 Friday, July 18th, we left Cornwall, and came safe to 
 Bristol, on Tuesday the 29th. After our conference 
 ended, we set off for the Chester circuit, where we ar- 
 rived safe on Monday, August the 18th. This is a try- : 
 ing circuit to flesh and blood: our journies are very long, 
 and in many places the congregations very small : yet 
 it pleased God to bless our labours, and increase out- 
 number. 
 
 Friday, January 16, 1778, I came to Whitchurch; 
 but my cough and hoarseness were such, that it was with 
 difficulty I could speak so as to be understood. I de- 
 sired Mr. Brown to supply my place a few days, while 
 
 1 rested at Mr. Sims', at Alperham. But as 1 was not 
 willing to be idle, I wrote two hymns, one for the morn- 
 ing, and another for the evening. Since that time, 1 
 have wrote about sixty more. I rind this to be both a 
 pleasing and profitable exercise : it keeps the mind quite 
 engaged on the subject, and lifted up to God in prayer 
 for assistance.
 
 MR. JOHN MURLIN. 77 
 
 Sabbath the 26th, I preached at Manchester in the 
 morning, and the Lord was present to bless us. In the 
 afternoon I preached at Oldham. But oh, what an alter 
 ation is here! The last time I was in this place I was 
 kept a prisoner in a public house, among drunkards, 
 swearers, and fighters ; but now, as soon as I entered 
 their new chapel, they sung a hymn of praise to God, on 
 mj account. , 
 
 From hence I went to Leeds, where our conference 
 began Tuesday the 4th. I laboured this year in the 
 Biadfoith circuit, with Mr. Hopper and Mr. Johnson 
 two of our old preachers, who have adorned the gospel, 
 and been useful labourers in our Lord's vineyard for 
 many years. We had some increase in our circuit this 
 year, and some found peace with God. But I find Satan 
 is very busy in every place. At Halifax he caused a 
 division in the society, about an angel with a trumpet in 
 his hand, which one party would have fixed on the top of 
 the sounding board over the pulpit, but the other would 
 not consent to it. And so warm were they on each side, 
 that the preachers could not reconcile them : so the af- 
 fair was left to the decision of Mr. Wesley. When he 
 came, he gave judgment against the angel ; and to put 
 an end to all future strife, Mr. Joseph Bradford made a 
 burnt saciafice of it on the altar of peace. Is it not 
 strange that men of common sense, and who profess an 
 uncommon degree of religion, should contend so warmly 
 about such trifles as these ? 
 
 Saturday, July 3, 1779, we left Halifax, and came to 
 Bradforth. I continued here, and in the neighbourhood 
 about a week, taking leave of our friends, in hopes to 
 meet again where pain and parting shall be no more. 
 
 We then came on through the societies to London, the 
 place of ray present destination ; where I labour in con- 
 nexion with a number of my brethren whom I highly 
 esteem. I believe we love as brethren, and that our la- 
 bour is not altogether in vain in the Lord. 
 
 Upon the whole, when I look back on the many years 
 I have now spent in testifying the grace of God, though 
 I have not made that advancement in the way which I 
 might have done, yet I can say to his glory, he has so 
 kept m6y that none can lay any thing to my charge with
 
 78 
 
 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 regard to my moral conduct, since God first spoke peace 
 to my soul in April, 1749. 
 
 I am clearly convinced that God has called me to 
 preach his everlasting gospel. And the more so, be- 
 cause it has pleased him by his Holy Spirit, to confirm 
 the word of his messenger. Indeed I am fully persua- 
 ded, that he does confirm the word of all whom he hath 
 sent, by using them in turnipg sinners from darkness to 
 light, and from the power of Satan unto God. 
 
 And I believe, that Christ is able to save unto the ut- 
 termost, all those that come unto God through him. I 
 cannot credit those who are continually telling the peo- 
 ple, that the Canaanite must dwell in the land to hum- 
 ble them : that is, Belial must be a partner with Christ 
 in this work ; as tho' Christ was not sufficient to hum- 
 ble the souls of God's children, without calling in sin 
 and Satan to his assistance* Learn of me, saith the Re- 
 deemer, for lam meek and lowly of heart ; and ye 
 shall find rest unto your souls. 
 
 I bless God, I can say to his glory, I do find constant 
 communion with him. And I pay no regard to those who 
 tell us, "you must come down from the mount: and you 
 must not mind your frames and feelings." No! If I 
 have the peace of God, do I not feel it ? If I do not feel 
 it, I have it not. And if I do not feel joy in the Holy 
 Ghost, it does not exist. And shall I not feel it more 
 and more ? I trust I shall, if I go on from faith to faith : 
 if I daily grow in grace, and in the knowledge of our 
 Lord Jesus Christ. 
 
 I bless God my heart is engaged in his work : and 
 there is nothing gives me greater satisfaction than to 
 hear of the prosperity of Zion. Yet how much longer I 
 shall be able to travel, I cannot tell, as I have a settled 
 rheumatism in my knee and thigh, and am far past the 
 meridian of life. But in all circumstances I have chosen 
 God for my portion, and the lot of my inheritance for- 
 ever. He hath been my helper hitherto ; and 1 trust, he 
 will help me to the end. O Lord ! forsake me not in 
 my old age. Lay thine everlasting arms beneath me ; 
 and give me a safe and comfortable passage through the 
 valley of the shadow of death : and then bring me to thy 
 holy hill, to praise thy name forever !
 
 MB. CHKISTOPHBE HOfPEh. £? 
 
 To conclude = I cannot better express my present 
 state and future prospect, than in the t« g following stan- 
 zas of Mr. Oliver's beautiful hymn, to the God of Abra- 
 ham. 
 
 Tho' nature's strength decay, and earth and hell withstand, 
 To Canaan's bounds I urge my way, at his command : 
 The wat'ry deep I pass, with Jesus in my view, 
 And thro' the howling wilderness, my way pursue. 
 
 The goodly land I see, with peace and plenty bless'd; 
 A land of sacred bberty, and endless rest ; 
 There milk and honey flow, and oil and wine abound^ 
 And trees of life forever grow, with mercy crowned. 
 
 THE EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 3VLH. CUBIST OPHEU HOPPED. 
 
 TO THE REV. MR. JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 Colk, Mat 20 ; 1780. 
 Reverend and dear Sir, 
 
 I NEVER had the least desire or design to trouble 
 others with my insignificant life. And I know how dif- 
 ficult it is for a man to ?peak of himself: but as you de- 
 sire it, I will do as well as I can. 
 
 1 kept a diary the first year after I set out from New- 
 castle-upon-Tyne, for Ireland. At my return I took a 
 fever at Newlands. After my recovery, I looked over 
 my journal with a view to go on ; but I saw so many 
 blunders and imperfections therein, that I immediately 
 committed it to the fire. Since that time I have no re- 
 gular account of my little labours; therefore I am under 
 a great disadvantage in giving any tolerable account of 
 them. 
 
 I have looked over my manuscripts, and have found a 
 few memorandums which have assisted me a little. — 
 Many other things I have committed to memory, which 
 never have, and I hope, never will be erased. 
 
 As I have had the pleasure of travelling with you 
 many hundred miles, ia England, Scotland, and Ireland, 
 these last five and thirty years ; I have been much help-
 
 80 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 ed by reading over your journals, to trace out my crook- 
 ed path. By these few assistances, I have endeavoured 
 to give some account of my nativity, childhood, and 
 callings; the various dealings of God with me from my 
 youth up to my conveisinn ; my call to preach the gos- 
 pel, the opposition and the success I met with when I 
 first set out. , 
 
 But I have given very little account of any of my la- 
 bours, trials, comforts, or success, these la*t eight and 
 twenty years. 1 apprehend these would swell too large 
 for your present purpose : I will therefore leave them 
 to that great day, when the righteous judge will reward 
 every man according to his works. 
 
 May the Lord succeed your labours, give you peace 
 in the way, a joyful exit, and then a crown of glory. — 
 Pray for me, who am, reverend and dear sir, your un- 
 worthy son in the gospel of Christ. 
 
 CHRISTOPHER HOPPER. 
 
 AN ACCOUNT OF 
 
 I WAS born at Low Coalbume, in the parish of Ry- 
 ton, in the county of Durham, on the 25th of December, 
 1722. Moses Hopper, my father, was a farmer : my 
 mother, whose name was Ann, was daughter to George 
 Barkiss, farmer, in the same county. They were both 
 of good repute, and much attached to the church of Eng- 
 land j but strangers to vital religion. 
 
 My mother had nine children, six sons and three 
 daughters, of whom I was the youngest. When I was 
 about five years old, I was sent to school to one Mr. Al- 
 derson, a man of piety and good understanding, who 
 taught those under his care, not only the branches of 
 learning he professed, but the fear of God, and the first 
 principles of religion. He catechised us twice every 
 week, and made us attend the church .every Lord's day, 
 and all holy days appointed for public service. After 1 
 had learned to read, write, and understand a little of the
 
 MR. CHRISTOPHER HOPPER. 81 
 
 mathematics, I lost my beloved master, who made a 
 most awful exit. He had been, as I thought, more de- 
 vout one week than common. The sabbath following, he 
 received the sacrament at Ryton church : some days af- 
 ter, a few gentlemen with fair words, persuaded him to 
 play a civil game at cards : but afterwards he fell into 
 great distress of mind, and could not properly attend his 
 school, which was often left to the care of his eldest son 
 and me. The spring following, after many sore conflicts, 
 he sunk into deep despair, and then drowned himself. 
 
 This melancholy event made my heart tremble, and 
 was a means of bringing some serious thoughts into my 
 mind about heaven, hell, death, and judgment. 1 began 
 to distinguish between vice and virtue, the godly aud 
 ungodly men. These impressions remained till I took a 
 severe illness, which continued near two vears. and re- 
 duced me to a mere skeleton. Mr. Foster, who attend- 
 ed me, pronounced me incurable. 
 
 This alarmed me, and filled my heart with slavish fear. 
 I judged it was high time to prepare for a future state; 
 and according to the light I had, began the business 
 without delay. I read my Bible with much pleasure, 
 prayer, and attention. The more I read it, the more I 
 loved it. Many verses, and some favourite chapters 
 which I understood best, made such an impression upon 
 me, that I soon had them by heart. The practice of pie- 
 ty, a form of prayers and a psalm-book, were my libra- 
 ry. I prayed and sung with fear, and some degree of 
 joy. I had very slight notions of my depraved nature, 
 and the sin of unbelief; but clear views of my actual 
 transgressions. I had been addicted to swear when I 
 was put out of humour ; and to lie when I could gain 
 any thing by it, or cover or excuse a fault. I had been 
 apt to pilfer among the children when 1 could do it with 
 a good grace. 
 
 I was very proud and prone to anger ; yea, of a cruel 
 disposition. 1 took a diabolical pleasure in hanging dogs, 
 worrying cats, and killing birds, and insects, mangling 
 and cutting them to pieces. One instance of my inhu- 
 manity I perfectly remember to this day. One evening 
 as I was returning home from school, with some of my 
 friendly associates, we found a great number of frogs 
 collected together in a marshy place : we proclaimed
 
 32 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 war against them : we armed ourselves with stones, and 
 with all the fury of littie fiends, murdered the poor, in- 
 nocent, defenceless creatures. We then left the field 
 in great triumph. But God soon requited me. That 
 night I dreampt I fell into a deep place full of frogs, and 
 they seized on me from head to foot, and began to eat 
 the flesh oft* my bones. I was in great terror, and found 
 exquisite pain until I awoke, sweating, and trembling, 
 and half dead with fear. 
 
 About this time my dear father died of a consumption: 
 I hope a true penitent. He was interred at Ryton 
 church with great solemnity, among his ancestors. I 
 was then left to the care of my indulgent mother and 
 brethren. Soon after my father's death, my eldest 
 brother married, and they divided my father's farm, and 
 the goods and chatties he left amongst them; but I was 
 neglected and overlooked like one that did not belong to 
 the family: but this did not give me the least concern. 
 My disorder still continued, with my convictions. I 
 prayed, wept, and looked towards the hill of Zion. I 
 found great comfort, and a good hope through grace. I 
 waited every day for my final dissolution, and longed to 
 be with Christ. " I loved Gud the great Redeemer, and 
 all mankind. I was happy. After some time it pleased 
 God to restore me to perfect health, beyond all human 
 expectation. After my recovery, my mind was quickly 
 drawn after the world again. 1 saw transitory objects 
 in another point of view, than I had done during the 
 time of my illness. My love to God and religion, and 
 my desires after another world, soon grew very cold. 1 
 quenched the Holy Spirit, who departed and left me 
 again to the folly of my own heart. 
 
 As I was the youngest child of the family, and had 
 nothing left me, I judged it would be proper to think of 
 some business to procure bread. And my mother and 
 brother being willing tn put me to the grammar school, 
 and give me a good education, I accepted the ofter, and 
 concluded it was the best thing I could do: but iu the 
 interim, one Mr. Armstrong, a shop keeper, wanted a 
 boy, and sent for me. I embraced the opportunity, and 
 prepared to go without delay. I thought I should 
 escape the wearisome task of study, having nothing to do 
 but improye the learning I had already, to qualify me
 
 MR. CHRISTOPHER HOPPER. 815 
 
 for a merchant's apprentice. My mother accompanied 
 me to Mr. Armstrong's, and put me in possession of my 
 new place. I went with great pleasure ; and met with a 
 kind reception. After I had been some time on trial, I 
 was to be bound by indenture for seven years. This put 
 my youthful mind into a new new chain of reasoning. I 
 thought I would neverbe bound to stand so long behind 
 a counter; therefore in spite of all persuasion, I left my 
 place and returned home. 
 
 After this a project entered into my head, that I would 
 be a musician. I told my brother. He approved of it, 
 bought me a violin, and provided me a master. I be- 
 gun with great assiduity, and concluded I had found 
 the very thing that would make me happy. I played 
 away all my convictions, lost my taste for spiritual 
 things, and banished all thoughts of a future world. I 
 now employed myself in doing some little things in the 
 house and about the farm ; and all the time I had to 
 spare, I spent in playing, singing, dancing, fishing, fowl- 
 ing, and whatever came next to my hand. I was then 
 between fifteen and sixteen years of age, and began to 
 think of some employment whereby I might have money 
 to support my foolish desires. My brother kept wa- 
 gon-horses. When the wagon-ways were first framed 
 between the new coal mines and the river Tyne, the 
 farmers were under an obligation to their landlords to 
 employ a certain number of horses for that purpose. I 
 was a strong, acti\e young man, and thought I could 
 manage a wagon very well. My brother was willing 
 I should make the trial, and gave me a proper horse for 
 that service. I soon made a great proficiency in this 
 dirty, slavish, and dangerous occupation. And I was 
 hugely pleased with my new department. Novelty 
 pleases, whether a man sits on a throne or a dunghill. 
 I frequently boasted of my strength, agility and skill, 
 in this sphere of action, and thought I was arrived at the 
 summit of my preferment: I found it a singular plea- 
 sure of whatever company I was, to talk of feeding and 
 guiding wagon-horses, of wagons and wagon-ways, 
 the nature and value of coal; and concluded I only 
 wanted a little money to make me a fitter, or a London 
 crimp. My vain mind was as much taken up with those 
 things, as the mathematicians with their abstruse sci- 

 
 84 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 ence, or the philosophers with the wonders of nature. 
 I foil" wed this business, and the various branches of 
 agriculture for about five year-. During this period of 
 my life. I was uiven up to folly. I gieedily pursued 
 according to ; .«, ability', all the pleasures of the world. 
 1 spent nights and days together in hunting, cock fight- 
 ting, card playing, norse-races, or whatever the devil 
 brought to toivn or country. And, O grief of heart ! 
 G. ntlernen, clergymen, mechanics and peasants, made 
 up the croud ! But in the enjoyment of these poor toys, 
 I had many severe checks, and sorrowful moments. 
 The universe appeared as a vault, wherein true comfort 
 was entombed; and the sun himself as a lamp, to shew 
 the gloomy horror of a guilty mind. I often said in my 
 cool intervals, hath the great God of love provided no 
 better things than these for his reasonable creatures? 
 Now at this time I was my own master, and lived with- 
 out controul ; I followed my former pleasures, but with 
 a trembling hand. I found Satan's service peifect 
 drudgery, and all earthly objects empty and vain. 
 
 In this dull, melancholy round, I dragged on for some 
 time, without any real comfert or solid satisfaction. I 
 was not happy, yet I believed there was something which 
 could make me so, but I knew not what it was, or where 
 to find it. Sometimes I reflected on what I felt in my 
 affliction, when I was a youth; but it appeared as a 
 dream. 1 was frequently in great and imminent danger. 
 Hut through the interpositions of a kind, unerring Provi- 
 dence, I escaped ten thousand snares and deaths, by night 
 and day, at home and abroad. One evening in particu- 
 lar, too of my companions and I were riding home in a wa- 
 g«.n very jovially, and as we were passing over a very 
 high battery, the horse started suddenly to one side, and 
 snatched the wagon from the planks : immediately it 
 overset, and turned over and over, to the bottom of the 
 hill. The trembling spectators who beheld this awful 
 eventj-concluded with shrieks and cries, "They are all 
 killed; their bones are broken in a thousand pieces." 
 But to their great astonishment, and our unspeakable 
 comfort, we were very little hurt. 
 
 After I had recovered my reason, and found I was 
 alive, and out of hell, my stubborn heart yielded to my 
 Almighty deliverer. I feared his great name, wept for 

 
 J51K. UBBlMUrHEK MUfriiK. 03 
 
 joy, and was overwhelmed with grief for my folly. This 
 deliverance wrought a deep conviction in my heart. 
 The true light shined on my dark soul, and God laid 
 me in the dust. I only wanted a spiritual guide to shew 
 me the way, but alas ! 1 could not find him in the country. 
 
 In May 1742, we heard a strange report of one Wes- 
 ley, a church clergyman that had been at Newcastle- 
 upon-Tyne, and had preached in Sandgate to many 
 thousands who heard him with astonishment. This new 
 thing made a huge noise. The populace entertained 
 various conjectures about him ; but few, if any, could 
 tell the motive on which he came, or the end he had in 
 view. He made a short blaze, soon disappeared, and 
 left us in a great consternation. Some time after, his 
 brother Charles came and preached at Tanfield cross. 
 I ran with the multitude to hear this strange preacher. 
 When I saw a man in a clergyman's habit, preaching at 
 a public cross to a large auditory, some gaping, some 
 laughing, and some weeping, I wondered what this 
 could mean. When he had concluded, some said, he is a 
 good man, and is sent to reform our land, others said, 
 nay, he is come to pervert and deceive us, and we ought 
 to stone him out of our coasts. I said, if he is a good 
 man, good will be done, and it is plaiu we want a refor- 
 mation ; but if he is an impostor, he can only leave us 
 as he found us, that is, without hope and without God iu 
 the world. I cannot tell what induced me to go so far, 
 but I found I was in danger of being called a Methodist, 
 and was glad to dismiss the conversation with a smile, 
 and a piece of drollery. 
 
 In November, Mr. Wesley returned to Newcastle, 
 formed the religious society, and laid the foundation of 
 the orphan -house. At the same time he visited Tan- 
 field-Leigh, Wickham, Swalwell, and Horsely. His 
 name was then well known in town and country. 
 
 All mouths were filled with Wesley and his followers : 
 some for, and many against them. I knew very little of 
 the matter, but thought it was most prudent to join the 
 general voice against this new way. 
 
 The spring following, 1743, John Brown, a plain far- 
 mer, removed from Tanfield-Leigh to the Low Spenn, 
 and invited Mr. Wesley to his house. I then heard 
 occasionally those preachers, who I thought could tell 
 8
 
 8§ EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 their story well, without stammering : but still found 
 much fault with this strange method of proceeding. At 
 this time there was a great clamour about religion 
 amongst all sects and parties, and I made a bustle 
 among the rest. I said, I will read my bible, say my 
 prayers, go to our parish church, reform my life, and be 
 good and pious, without the scandal of the cross. Alas ! 
 I did not consider, *'no cross no crown." 
 
 I hobbled on in this lame, ignorant manner, till at 
 last I became deeply serious. 1 saw there was more in 
 religion than I enjoyed or understood. I saw that God 
 had been striving with me from my infant days. I look- 
 ed back with astonishment on his loud calls, compas- 
 sionate helps, tender mercies, and great deliverances.-— 
 He had raised me from the gates of death, when all hu- 
 man help failed. He had saved me from perils and dan- 
 gers by night and by day. He had richly provided for 
 me, when I was left to myself very young. A sight of 
 these favours, raised in my cold heart some sensations 
 of gratitude to my bountiful benefactor. I said in my 
 heart, shall 1 trifle with the Almighty God of heaven and 
 earth ? Shall I fly in the face of my infinite Creator ? 
 Shall I play with eternal things ? Will God always 
 strive with the children of men r My few days are pas- 
 sing away like a shadow ; pale death is approaching ; 
 the Judge is standing at the door; eternity, eternity, is 
 come ! alas ! I am not ready. I am in my sins — unholy, 
 unhappy, and therefore not prepared to die. 
 
 I will cry to God for mercy. He willeth not the 
 death of a sinner. It is his pleasure to save me from 
 sin and the punishment due to it. He waits to be gra- 
 cious, that his great name may be exalted. He is. good 
 to all, and his mercy is over all his works. I am a mon- 
 ument of his sparing goodness, I will therefore look up 
 and hope in his word. Behold ! this is the accepted 
 time; behold! this is the day of salvation. God hath 
 sent his servants to shew poor sinners the way of life. 
 I was then determined to hear and judge for myself. — 
 God had now prepared my heart for the reception of the 
 truth. I said, I will no longer be led by the laughing 
 multitude, nor be deluded with the noise of vain tongues. 
 
 The sabbath day following, Mr. Reeves preached at 
 the Low-Spenn, at one o'clock in the afternoon. 1
 
 MR. CHRISTOFHER H0PPE.R. 
 
 87 
 
 heard him with great attention, but found a veil on mp 
 heart. I did not clearly see God's method of justifying 
 a guilty sinner, through faith in the blood of his Son. 
 
 In the evening he preached again on these words, "And 
 now abideth faith, hope, and love, these three, but the 
 greatest of these is love." In his plain pathetic manner, 
 he gave us a definition of these principal graces, with 
 their inseparable concomitants, and shewed the unspeak- 
 able happiness of all those who had a saving faith, a good 
 hope, and the love of God. The word came home to my 
 heart with energy. The veil was removed. The true 
 light shined upon me, and I said, alas, I am undone ! If 
 these things are true ; and doubtless they are, I have 
 only the faith of a devil, the hope of a hypocrite, and the- 
 love of this present evil world. My mouth was stopped. 
 I stood guilty before God. My stout heart melted like 
 wax before the fire. I trembled at the word. My strength 
 left me. God frowned ; his law condemned ; conscience 
 roared ; Satan raged ; and the pit was ready to receive 
 me. 
 
 I quietly retired from the croud into a little parlour to 
 cover my shame. I sat down on the side of a bed, and 
 reclined my guilty head on the pillow, in great distress 
 of mind. It was the cry of my heart, "God be merciful to 
 me a sinner ! Save, Lord, or I perish !" Save or I am lost, 
 for ever lost ! My all is guilt, pollution, misery, and 
 helplesness. In this wretched situation I continued 
 some time, shut up in unbelief as in a prison. I could 
 only say, Lord help me ! He then heard my cry, and sent 
 me relief. A glorious light shone into my heart, and 
 discovered to me the blessed plan of man's redemption, 
 through the blood of a crucified Saviour. I saw God had 
 fulfilled his great, original promise. He sent his son to 
 save sinners, the chief of sinners. He lived, suffered and 
 died for a lost world. "He tasted death for every man." 
 "He gave himself aransom for all." I said in my trouble, 
 the good Shepherd came from heaven to earth, to 4 ' geek 
 and save that which was lost, to bring again that which 
 was driven away, to bind up that which was broken, and 
 to strengthen that which was sick." But I am lost, lam 
 driven to the mouth of hell, ready to drop into the flames: 
 I am broken to pi«ees ; I am sick of sin, sick of myself, 
 and sick of a vain world : 1 will therefore look unto the
 
 88 
 
 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 Lord ; my God will hear me. He hath died for me. I 
 shall, yea, doubtless, 1 shall obtain mercy after all 1 have 
 done. The God of truth hath promised mercy ; the Son 
 of his love hath procured mercy; the Spirit of truth is 
 ready to reveal mercy ; and the messengers of peace are 
 come to proclaim mercy, free mercy, to every perishing 
 sinner, through the blood of the everlasting covenant ! 1 
 said, 1 can, 1 will, 1 do believe in the only true God, and 
 in Jesus Christ whom he hath sent. 1 am freely jus- 
 tified. 1 am saved through faith in the blood of the Lamb. 
 God is my God in Christ. The love of God is shed 
 abroad in my heart, by the Holy Ghost given unto me. — 
 The Spirit of bondage is gone. The Spirit of adoption 
 is come. 1 can now cry, Abba Father. The same Spirit 
 beareth witness with my spirit that 1 am a child of God. 
 No enmity — no wrath — no curse — no condemnation — 
 The ruined sinnner is saved. 1 then found a glorious, 
 and undeniable change. God, Christ angels, men, hea- 
 ven, earth, and the whole creation appeared to me in a 
 new light, and stood related to me in a manner 1 never 
 knew before. 1 found love to my God, to his yoke, to 
 his cross, and to his saints, to his friends and enemies. 
 1 said, This is bible religion, scriptural Christianity, let 
 men call it what they please : a delusion, enthusiasm, 
 Methodism, or Mahometism, that is nothing to me: hard 
 names do not change the nature of the thing. 1 then 
 went on my way rejoicing ; a wonder to my father's fa- 
 mily ; .to all that knew me: and to myself. All my idols 
 fell to the ground, before the ark of God. 1 found a per- 
 feot hatred to sin, and a complete victory over it. 
 
 The whole tenor of my life and conversation was new. 
 Free grace, infinite mercy, boundless love, made the 
 change. My heart, my tongue, my hands, were now, in 
 my little way, employed for my loving God. I was no 
 longer of the world, therefore the world began imme- 
 diately to hate me. Some said, Ah ! what think you ! 
 Christopher Hopper is converted ! Others said, he hath 
 received the Holy Ghost ! Others said, he is mad, keep 
 far from him, come not near his habitation. Some of a 
 more compassionate turn, pitied me : but all agreed 1 had 
 renounced my baptism, left the church, and was in a 
 dangerous situation.
 
 MR. CHRISTOPHER HOPPER. 
 
 89 
 
 Soon after, Mr. Wesley came to Low-Spenn, formed 
 a little society, and made me a leader, to help and watch 
 over them. 1 was but a novice, a young raw disciple, 
 unskilled in the word of righteousness : but faith in 
 Christ, and the love ot God in my heart, overcame all 
 the powers of darkness. I found unspeakable pleasure 
 in doing and suffering the will of God. I laboured dili- 
 gently with my hands : I owed no man any thing. I 
 had enough for myself, and a little to spare for others. 
 I attended four or five meetings every week : we prayed, 
 sung psalms and hymns, read the bible, and exhorted 
 one another to fear and love God. The power of the 
 Lord was present to heal : he owned his own work, and 
 gave us prosperity. Many of my old companions were 
 awakened ; also my poor old mother, one of my sisters, 
 and one of my brothers, who had been a champion in 
 the Devil's cause, but has been an ornament to religion 
 from that time to this day. The fire now kindled, and 
 the flame spread. I had one invitation after another, to 
 High-Spenn, Barlow, Woodside, Prudhoe, Newlands, 
 Blanchland, Durham, Sunderland, and many other 
 places. 
 
 As yet I had not examined my call to preach the gos- 
 pel, nor considered the consequences of such an under- 
 taking. I was sweetly carried on with a strong prevail- 
 ing influence, and a loving desire to promote the glory 
 of God. I saw the world dead in trespasses and sins, 
 void of light, holiness, and happiness. I therefore 
 thirsted after their salvation, and thought it my duty to 
 promote it. God blessed his word. Sinners were turn- 
 ed from darkness to light, and from the power of Satan 
 to God. But the Devil was highly displeased ; he saw 
 his kingdom was in danger, and immediately proclaimed 
 war against me. 
 
 I met with great persecutions, many discouragments, 
 and much opposition in every place. Men of all ranks 
 used their power and influence, to stop this blessed work 
 of God. They spoke all manner of evil against the 
 work, and the instruments employed therein. They 
 dispensed with two or three awakened clergymen, tole- 
 rably well. These were regularly ordained, men of 
 learning, gentleman and divines: but to see a ploughman, 
 
 or an honest mechanic stand up to preach the gospel, it 
 8 *
 
 W EXPERIENCE OT 
 
 was insufferable. HpII was movod from hpiipnth • a 
 council was called ; the edict came forth, and war com- 
 menced ! 
 
 Laymen and ecclesiastics joined heart and hand to 
 suppress these iiestilent fellows: not with acts* of kind- 
 ness, scripture, or reason; but with invectives and lies, 
 dirt, rotten eggs, brickbat9, stones, and cudgels ; these 
 were Satan's arguments in vindication of his own cause. 
 It was the common cry in town and country, 'Press them 
 for soldiers, send them on board^a man of war; trans- 
 port them; beat them; stone them; send them to 
 prison : or knock out their brains ; and dispatch them at 
 onee, for there i9 no law for them.* 
 
 Several of my fellow-sufferers had shared honest 
 John Nelson's fate already, and 1 expected to be the 
 next: they had their eyes on me; they daily pursued 
 me as Saul did David ; they waited for an opportunity 
 to seize on the prey, but the hand of the Lord was with 
 me, so I escaped ! He delivered me by various means, 
 at sundry times, and often in a very remarkable manner. 
 
 Once in particular, as I was preaching at Wickham, 
 to a quiet attentive congregation, the constable came 
 with his attendants to apprehend me : they guarded the 
 door, and stood with fierce impatience to seize me. 
 When I had concluded, I stepped down, went through 
 the midst of them, was conveyed through a window, and 
 "went quietly home, leaving the peace-officer, and his 
 gentlemen, to end the dispute with loud words, hard 
 blows, and bloody faces ' 
 
 When I first set out to do all the good I could, with- 
 out fee or reward, I did not foresee this violent storm. 
 I begun now to consider what latitude I was in, and 
 whether it would not be a point of wisdom to tack about, 
 and steer for some quiet harbour. 
 
 There had been many things said and vrote against 
 this new way ; especially, against those illiterate preach- 
 ers who so exceedingly disturbed the world. I found 
 some doubts concerning my call to the work, and almost 
 wished they might be well grounded, that I might, with 
 a good conscience, desist from preaching. 
 
 * This was a great mistake. There was law for us : but we 
 could not find a magistrate who had courage or honesty enough 
 ro put it in force.
 
 MR. CHRISTOPHER HOPPER. 9.1 
 
 I was, therefore, determined to examine myself, whe- 
 ther I had a right to preach: or whether I had rashly en- 
 tered into a work that did not belong to me. One even- 
 ing I went into a wood, by the side of Darwent water, 
 much dejected. Clouds and darkness surrounded me, 
 and my spirit was troubled within me : I said, my ene- 
 mies are too strong for me : there are few on the Lord's 
 side, but myriads against him : what shall I do ? Alas ! 
 "My family is poor in Manassah, and I am least in my fa- 
 ther's house." 1 am a worm and no man. O my God ! 
 let me enjoy this sweet solitude, and see my friends and 
 companions no more ! Let me live as a hermit in this 
 lonely desert, till my few days ars ended ; then shall my 
 weary spirit be at reft. 
 
 I did not want ease, wealth or honour; but to know, 
 do, and suffer the will of my Lord and Master. 1 thought 
 if 1 have made a mistake, God will forgive me, and 1 will 
 take shame to myself: 1 will desist from preaching, and 
 live and die a private Christian. But if God hath called 
 me to publish the Gospel of his dear Son, 1 must bear a 
 public testimony, and leave the event to Him. 
 
 In the midst of these reflections, it occurred to my 
 mind, What evidence is sufficient to satisfy me in this 
 weighty matter ? 1 only want a rational, scriptural evi- 
 dence. Let me then enquire, with prayer and ^fasting, 
 what reason have 1 to believe that 1 am called to preach 
 the gospel ? 
 
 1. I have heard and believed the gospel, and found it 
 to be the power of God to the salvation of my own soul : 
 Rom. i. 16. and 1 believe it to be the powerful means 
 which God hath appointed to reclaim, and save lost sin- 
 ners. 2 I believe all power is given to Jesus Christ in 
 heaven and in earth, Matth. xxvhi. 18. therefore he alone 
 hath power and authority to call, qualify, and thrust out 
 labourers into his own harvest. Heuce d l learn, that this 
 power cannot be acquired by human art or learning, or 
 purchased with gold or silver. Acts viii. 20. 3. I believe 
 those who are called and put into this work by him, shall 
 turn sinners from darkness to light, and from the power 
 of Satan to God. Acts xxvi. 18. 4. 1 have a rational 
 Gonviction that God hath committed unto me the word of 
 reconciliation: 2 Cor. v. 8. 1 have this treasure in an 
 earthen vessel, (in a feeble mortal body,) that the excel--
 
 9£ EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 lency of the power may be of God and not of man. 2 Cor 
 iv. 7. 1 find by daily experience, "We are not sufficient 
 of ourselves to think any tiling as of ourselves, but our 
 sufficiency is of God." 2 Cor. iii. 5. 5 According to this 
 conviction, 1 have preached the gospel to sinners dead in 
 sin, and they have been awaked and conve.ted to God. — 
 Children of the Devil are become children of God, and 
 heirs of eternal life. 
 
 Having considered these things, I concluded my call to 
 preach the gospel was consistent with scripture, reason, 
 and experience; I was filled with joy. I said, "Ihave now 
 the countenance of my God ; the hands of his dear Son, 
 the bishop «<f my soul, laid upon me; the approbation of 
 the three presbyters sent by him ; the prayers of his dear 
 people ; the testimony of a good conscience, and the plea- 
 sure of seeing Zion prosper. I therefore pray earnestly 
 that God may incline, persuade, and sweetly influence my 
 heart, and open my mouth by his holy spirit, to dispense 
 the word of truth to a world of perishing sinners. This 
 I desire to do continually, in season and out of season, 
 according to the ability he hath given me." My droop- 
 ing spirit now revived. The fear of men and devils de- 
 parted from me, and I set out with double courage. I 
 eould say, "Jehovah is my light and my salvation, whom 
 shall I fear ? Jehovah is the strength of my life, of whom 
 shall I be afraid ? Then the word of the Lord came un- 
 to me saying, cry aloud and spare not, lift up thy voice 
 like a trumpet, and shew my people their transgressions, 
 and the house of Jacob their sins. My heart replied, 
 for Zion's sake I will not hold my peace, and for Jeru- 
 salem's sake I will not rest, until the righteousness 
 thereof go forth as brightness, and the salvation thereof 
 as a lamp that burnetii." The Lord was with me night 
 and day : his threatenings passed over me ; his promises 
 comforted me ; and his precepts were ray delight. I 
 could say, 
 
 To me, with thy dear name, is given, 
 Pardon, and holiness, and heaven. 
 
 In the year 1744, 1 taught a school at Barlow, in the 
 parish of Ryton. My time was employed six days in 
 teaching the children under my care, the branches of 
 learning 1 professed, and the first principals ef Christi- 
 anity.
 
 MR. CHRISTOPHER HOPPER. 95 
 
 1 spent every sabbath, and all my vacant hours in 
 preaching, reading, praying, visiting the sick, and con- 
 versing with all that providence put in way. God was 
 with me, and blessed my weak labours. .Sinners were 
 converted, believers multiplied, and my soul rejoiced in 
 God my Saviour. 
 
 But Satan did not like this work : therefore he stirred 
 up the Rector of Ryton and his Curate, with those un- 
 der their influence, to prevent me. They gave me first 
 hard words, and then hard blows . 
 
 In a little time 1 was summoned to appear in the spi- 
 ritual court at Durham, to answer for my conduct. 1 
 did not know what 1 had done, but was soon informed, 
 that 1 was impeached for teaching a school without li- 
 cence ; and what was still worse, for calling sinners to 
 epentance, and warning the wicked to flee from the 
 wrath to come ; (an offence that cannot be overlooked 
 by men who know not God ! ) but God raised me up 
 friends, who stood by me, and defended my cause against 
 all my adversaries. 
 
 After this troublesome affair was ended, 1 met with a 
 trial of another kind. Before 1 was awakened, I was 
 deeply in love with one Jane Richardson, a farmer's 
 daughter, and an agreable young woman. She was my 
 first love : and had laid fast hold on my youthful heart. 
 She had every accomplishment 1 wanted, but religion. 
 Alas ! she was unacquainted with God. This was a bar 
 indeed ! 1 found a desire to break off all correspondence 
 with her ; but was afraid she could not hear it. 1 was 
 greatly troubled, and prayed for Divine direction. God 
 was pleased to hear and grant my request. She was soon 
 awakened, and found peace with God. AH objections 
 being removed, on May the 28th, 1745, we were joined 
 together in Ryton Church. She was a loving wife, a 
 faithful friend, and a very agreeable companion. She 
 made my joys and sorrows her own. We worshipped 
 God in spirit and truth ; and rejoiced in the Son of his 
 love. 
 
 The same evening 1 preached at the Low-Spenn. The 
 Lord was with us, and we praised his name together. 
 We lived a few months with my wife's friends, at the 
 Smeals, near Darwent, in a most loving, agreeable man- 
 ner. God made us of one heart and mind, and united 
 our souls together, by one spirit in humble love.
 
 94 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 In the year 1746, 1 removed from Barlow to the 
 preaching house at Sheephill, 1 received the preachers, 
 and my other religious friends, with much pleasure. My 
 heart was open, my door was open, and my little table 
 free for strangers. I gave up my soul, body, and sub- 
 stance to my adorable Saviour, and grieved 1 had no 
 more to give. 
 
 1 commonly preached, or met a class every evening, 
 after 1 had dismissed my scholars. 1 preached twice or 
 thrice, and often four times every sabbath day. When 
 1 had a day or two to spare from my present vocation, L 
 visited Newcastle, Sunderland, Durham, and many other 
 towns and villages, ten, twenty, or thirty miles round 
 Herein I met with much opposition, and was frequently 
 in great jeopardy. Indeed ldid not much regard a little 
 dirt, a few rotten eggs, the sound of a cow's horn, the 
 noise of bells, or a few snow balls in their season, but 
 sometimes I was saluted with blows, stones, brickbats 
 and bludgeons. These I did not well like > they were 
 not pleasing to flesh and blood. 
 
 Lsometimes lost a little skin, and once* a little blood, 
 which was drawn from my forehead with a sharp stone. 
 I wore a patch a few days, and was not ashamed : I glo- 
 ried in the cross. And when my small sufferings 
 abounded for the sake of Christ, my comfort abounded 
 much more. I never was more happy in my own soul, 
 or more blessed in my labours. 
 
 The latter end of July, 1747,1 had a call to visit Corn- 
 wood, and met with a kind reception. I preached sever- 
 al times among the people called Quakers ; I hope good 
 was done. 
 
 On my return I had an invitation to preach at Allen- 
 dale town. A great congregation attended, who behaved 
 well, aod heard the word giadly. The latter end of De- 
 cember, I visited Allendale again. A glorious work 
 broke out. The Lord stretched out his hand to save sin- 
 ners. Mr. Topping, minister of that place, used all his 
 art, power, and influence to stop it : but he could do no- 
 thing; his strength was perfect weakness against the 
 Lord. 
 
 * It was at Sunderland, in the midst of an outrageous mob of 
 sail9r.s:
 
 Mfc. CtfRlSTOPHBft flOfPER. 95 
 
 I went from town to town, and from house to house, 
 singing, praying, and preaching the word, and great mul- 
 titudes followed from place to place, weeping, and seek- 
 ing him that was crucified. Great numbers were awaken- 
 ed, and found peace with God, through the blood of the 
 Lamb. I have frequently seen a whole congregation 
 melted into tears, and bowed down before the Lord, as 
 the heart of one man: especially once, when I was preach- 
 ing in Mr. Lowe's eld barn, at Dod Bank, the Lord 
 manifested his great power. He wrought for the glory 
 of his own name, and I stood still, and looked on with 
 loving fear and wonder. 
 
 In the year 1748, 1 gave up my school at Sheephill, 
 and every thing that was comfortable and convenient, 
 and removed to Hindley-hill, in Allendale. 1 lodged 
 with honest James Broad wood, and wai as one ofhis fami- 
 ly. The presence of the Lord dwelt in his house, and 
 we lived in peace and unity. 1 formed a society at Hind- 
 ley-hill, another at We6tallen ; one at Alesden, and one 
 at Ninthead : the Lord was among them of a truth. 1 had 
 now work enough, and God's blessing on my labour. 
 In the latter end of this year I visited Weardale. Some 
 of the brethren attended me from Allendale. 
 
 It was in a storm of snow that we crossed the quag- 
 mires, and enormous mountains. When we came into 
 the Dales, we met with a very cold reception. The 
 enemy had barricaded the place, and made his bulwarks 
 strong. But the Lord made way for his truth. He 
 opened the heart of a poor Scotch shepherd to receive 
 us into his little thatched cabbin, where we lodged all 
 night. 
 
 The next day I preached under the walls of an old 
 castle. A few childreu, and two or three old women at- 
 tended, who looked hard at us. When I had done we 
 followed them into their houses, and talked freely to 
 them in their own language, about the kingdom of God. 
 They heard and obeyed the gospel. The next evening 
 I had a large congregation, who heard with much atten- 
 tion, and received the word gladly. Sometime after I 
 preached in private houses, ale-houses, cock-pits, or 
 wherever I could find a door opeu. The fire than spread 
 from heart to heart, and God was glorified. 
 
 This was the beginning of a good work in Weardale, 
 which has continued, and increased to this day.
 
 96 EXNtHIENCE OF 
 
 The spring following, in the year 1749, I begun teach- 
 ing a school, near Hindley-IIill. But the work of God 
 so increased in my hands, that I could not properly at- 
 tend it 5 therefore, in the latter end of the year, I gave 
 it up, with all other secular employments, and cast my- 
 self on the bounty of my Lord and master. 
 
 My little substance soon failed, and I saw nothing be- 
 fore me but beggary, and great affliction. Sometimes I 
 was carried above all earthly objects, and had a comfort- 
 able view of the heavenly country. At other times I 
 was much depressed, and could see nothing but poverty 
 and distress. 
 
 I well remember, once on the top of a cold mountain, 
 in a violent storm of snow, when congealed flakes cov- 
 ered me with a white mantle, Satan assaulted me, and 
 pushed me hard to return to my school, or some other 
 business to procure bread. I staggered through unbelief, 
 and almost yielded to the tempter. 
 
 But as the attack was sudden, so the battle was soon 
 over. The Lord sent these words to my heart like light- 
 ning. " When I sent you without purse, and scrip, and 
 shoes, lacked ye any thing? and they said, nothing, Lord." 
 Luke xxii. 35. I answered with aloud voice, " nothing, 
 Lord ; nothing, Lord." All my doubts and fears vanish- 
 ed in a moment, and I went on my way rejoicing ! 
 
 Constrain'd to cry, by love divine, 
 My God, thou art forever mine • 
 
 Since that time I have been richly supplied with all 
 good things. This day I am full. I have all, and abound j 
 praise God and the Lamb forever 1 
 
 The work now begun to spread in the Dales, Hexam- 
 shire, North-Tyne, and soon reached White-Haven. 
 
 And now God raised up many preachers : men emi- 
 nent both for gifts and grace. Some of them continue 
 local, and some are itinerant preacher to this day. The 
 latter end of the year* 1749. 1 left the Dales, and the 
 dear children, God had given me. I rode to the Smears, 
 where I parted with my dear wife and friends, with 
 melting hearts, and many tears. 
 
 * From this period, I shall oniy give a short sketch of my tra- 
 vels, and now and then mention a small incide nt,
 
 MR. CHRISTOPHER HOPPER. 9? 
 
 In those days we had no provision made for preachers' 
 wives, no funds, no stewards. He that had a staff 
 might take it, go without, or stay at home. 
 
 I then set out for Bristol. I called at Chester, Dur- 
 ham, Stockton, Thirsk and Knaresborough, and found 
 the Lord in every place. I spent a few days at Leeds. 
 Here God opened my mouth to speak his word, and I 
 hope good was done. 
 
 I preached at Birstal, on the tap of the hill before 
 the foundation of the preaching house was laid. Large 
 congregations attended, and the power of the Lord was 
 present to heal. 1 rode on to Halifax, and found their 
 little society at Skircsat-Green. God gave us a bless- 
 ing. I then rode to Rochdale, and preached in the 
 evening at the widow Whittaker's, to as many as the 
 house could contain. They were turbulent enough, but 
 we were not afraid, for God was with us. Next day I 
 rode to Manchester, and preached that evening in a 
 little garret by thp river side. The congregation mul- 
 tiplied every meeting. On the sabbath day, the old 
 place would not contain them. The multitude was im- 
 patient to hear. The old wooden house shook under 
 us. and put the congregation in confusion. Many trem- 
 bled, and some believed. The next evening they pro- 
 cured me an Anabaptist meeting house. The place 
 was crouded. They heard with attention. Many were 
 awakened, and joined themselves to seek and worship 
 Gud. They immediately bought a piece of ground, and 
 laid the foundation of their first preachi.ig house, which 
 is now their dwelling house. I rode through Cheshire, 
 and joined a society at Alpraham, and another at Pool. 
 It was an humbling time among the opulent farmers: 
 the murrain raging amongst their cattle. They buried 
 them in the open fields. Their graves were a sole no 
 scene. The hand of the Lord was on the land. I vi- 
 sited the suburbs of Chester. God begun a good work 
 then, which has increased, and continued to this day. 
 I preached at Birmingham, Evesham, Stroud, aud Kings- 
 w ood, and then rode to Bristol, where I spent a few 
 days, and I hope not in vain. 
 
 March 20. 1750. I set out with Mr. Wesley for Ire- 
 land. We crossed the New Passage into Wales, and 
 reached Cardiff before night. 
 9
 
 98 EXPERIENCE or 
 
 81. We rode to Brecknock through heavy rain; Mr. 
 Wesley's mare fell twice, and threw him over her r*ead, 
 but without any hurt to man or beast. 
 
 22. We rode to Builth. A congregation waited for 
 Howell Harris, but he did not come at the time ap- 
 pointed; so, at their request. Mr. Wesley preached. I 
 then spoke a few words. It was a time of love. The 
 Welsh brethren rejoiced in the Lord. We then rode 
 to Machynleth, and then to Dolgelly, wet and weary 
 enough. 
 
 24. We rode to Dannabull. It rained incessantly all 
 the way. Our horses were tired, and we were ready to 
 faint, but God was our strength, and we rejoiced in our 
 little toil. 
 
 Sabbath day, 26. Mr. Wesley preached at Howell 
 Thomas's, in Trefollwin parish. In the afternoon at 
 Wm. Piitchard's. The people understood no English, 
 but their looks, sighs and gestures, shewed God was 
 speaking to their hearts! 
 
 We then went to lodge with one Mr. Holiday, an 
 exciseman, who lived in a quiet solitary place, where no 
 human voice was heard but those of the family. 
 
 Wednesday, 29. We rode to Holy Head, and sent 
 back our horses with John Jane, who had travelled from 
 Bristol to the Head with three shillings, and had one 
 penny left. About eleven o'clock we went on board. 
 As soon as we-sailed, we had wind and rain enough 
 without, and a violent storm in the ship. Mr. Griffith, 
 of Carnarvonshire, a clumsy, hardfaced man, saluted us 
 with a volley of ribaldry, obscenity, and blasphemy; but 
 God stopped his mouth, and he was confounded. 
 
 Thursday, 30. We wrought our way four leagues to- 
 wards Ireland, but we were driven back in the after- 
 noon to the mouth of the harbour. The wind then 
 shifted two points, and we ventured out again; by mid- 
 night we were got half way over, but the wind turning 
 full against us, and blowing hard, soon bi ought us back 
 into the bay again. Mr. Wesley preached that evening 
 on the story of Dives and Lazarus, to a room full of 
 men daubed with gold and silver, but they were soon 
 satisfied with it, and went away murmuring. After 
 they were gone, we had a comfortable meeting with a 
 few plain Welshmen.
 
 MB. CHRISTOPHER HOPPER. 99 
 
 Saturday 31. We were determined to wait one week 
 longer, it the wind did not serve before. Mr. Wesley 
 preached in the evening. Captain Griffith, with his 
 dear gentlemen, made noise enough, but our God deli- 
 vered us. 
 
 April 1. We returned to Mr. Holiday's, called at 
 William Pritchard's, then went to Llanerell. Ymadd, 
 but the sons of belial would not suffer us to enter the 
 place. 
 
 Thursday, 5. Mr. Wesley preached near the town to 
 a few precious souls, who heard and obeyed the word. 
 
 Friday 6. The wind came fair, so we road to Holy 
 Head early in the morning, embarked with a fair wind, 
 and in the evening landed at Dublin. I spent a few 
 days in that city, and I hope not in vain. I then visited 
 Portarlington, Edendeiry, Mountmellick, Tyrrelspass, 
 Bir, and Aughrim. and found the Lord was with me in 
 every place. I had great crosses, but greater comforts. 
 I then rode to Dublin, and spent a few days there with 
 much sati-faction. 
 
 July 22. I embarked with Mr. Wesley for England. 
 We sailed about ten in the morning, and in the after- 
 noon came to an anchor. 
 
 Monday 23. We had a vehement squall of wind, 
 thunder and li-jhtnin^, between the Welsh Sands and 
 the rocky shore of Lundy. We cried to the Lord in. 
 our trouble, and he delivered us out of our distress. 
 
 Tuesday, 24. The wind was contrary. It blew a 
 storm. The seas ran mountain high. We were tossed 
 is a narrow channel, fall of shoals, rocks, and sands. 
 We praved for help; our God heard, and brought us 
 safe to Pill. 
 
 The next day I came to Bristol, where I spent a few 
 days with pleasure, and then set out for Nevvcastle-up- 
 oo Tyne. I visited the societies in my way, and they 
 refreshed me in the love of Jesus. 
 
 I spent a few weeks at and about Newcastle. My 
 dear friends were glad to see me. We rejoiced togeth- 
 er. I then set out for Whitehaven, where I had a good 
 season. The Lord crowned my weak labours with suc- 
 cess. About the latter end of the year, I left White- 
 haven, rode to Cockermouth, then to Penrith, and the 
 next day came to Hindley Hill. I took a fever in my
 
 100 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 journey, but rode on to Newlands, where I took mv 
 bed. My dear wife met me with joy and grief. She 
 soon catched the disorder, and we continued sick for 
 many weeks. 
 
 We lodged with Mr. George Hunter, a friendly man. 
 God richly provided all things for us. He blessed us 
 in our sickness, and restored us to health. Praised be 
 His dear name forever! 
 
 In the spring, 1751, I set out for Bristol. I met with 
 honest John Nelson, at Leeds. We rode on together 
 with some other preachers. We spoke freely to all that 
 Providence put in our way, and God blessed our la- 
 bours. We rode through heavy rains and rapid floods, 
 but the Lord preserved both man and beast, and brought 
 us to our journey's end in peace. 
 
 Monday, March 11. Our conference began at Bristol. 
 The more we conversed, the more our love increased to 
 God and one another. We kept to our first doctrines, 
 and were of one heart and one mind. 
 
 I then returned to Newcastle-upon-Tyne, visiting the 
 brethren in my way. I preached every evening at se- 
 ven, and every morning at five o'clock, and often at 
 noon day: the common work of a Methodist preacher. 
 
 Monday, April 22. I set out with Mr. Wesley for 
 Scotland. We rode to Alnwick. Our friends received 
 us with joy. We praised God together. 
 
 Wednesday, 23. We rode to Berwick. Mr. Wesley 
 preached at a young man's funeral who had been cut oft' 
 suddenly. It was a solemn time. Many heard for 
 Eternity. 
 
 Thursday, 24. We rode to Old Camus, through a 
 Scotch mist. We rode past Preston Field, saw the 
 place of battle, and colonel Gardiner's house. Here 
 that good man, and brave soldier, fought and died for 
 his king and country. We then rode on to Musselbo- 
 rough, where Mr. Wesley preached in a large school, to 
 a company of wise men, so called. 
 
 Friday, 25. We rode back to Berwick. I left Mr. 
 Wesley, and the week following returned to Mussel- 
 borough, where I spent a few days. I preached night 
 and morning to a large congregation, who heard with 
 great attention. This was the beginning of a good 
 work in Scotland. Some years after, I preached at
 
 MR. CHRISTOPHER HOPPER. 101 
 
 Edinburgh, Dunbar, Leith, Dundee, and Aberdeen. — 
 God blessed his word, and raised up witnesses to tes- 
 tify that he had sent us to the North Britons also. 
 
 In 1752, I set out with my wife for Whithaven, 
 where I spent a few days with pleausre and profit to 
 myself and others. We then embarked for Ireland, and 
 after a tedious voyage landed at Dublin. I spent a few 
 weeks in that city, and then rode to Cork, where 1 spent 
 the winter with joy and sorrow. We had warm work 
 in that city for a long time, but the word of the Lord 
 prevailed, and silenced the enemy. 
 
 In the spring I returned to Dublin, and met my wife 
 and friends, who had just escaped the fire of a very hot 
 persecution. This year I had many blessings and cross- 
 es, both by sea and land. 
 
 I'll praise my God with ev'ry breath, 
 
 O! let me die to see thy day! 
 Now snatch me from this life of death, 
 
 O! come my Saviour, come away! 
 
 In the year 1753, 1 left Dublin and embarked for En- 
 gland. We landed at Whithaven. I first visited the 
 Dales, then rode to Newcastle, and the Lord was with 
 us of a truth. 
 
 In the year 1754, I embarked at North Shields for 
 London. ay 22, our conference began. It was a 
 time of love. 
 
 In June I embarked for Newcastle. I had a quick 
 and pleasant passage. I preached to the ship's compa- 
 ny, who heard the word with joy. I landed at Shields, 
 and then came to the Orphan-house in Newcastle-upon- 
 Tyne, where we praised God and the Lamb, with one 
 heart and voice, for mercies we had received. 
 
 May 6, 1755. Our conference began at Leeds. The 
 first question was, "whether we ought to separate from 
 the Church of England?" After many deep and serious 
 conversations, we concluded that it was not expedient 
 for many reasons. 
 
 I then set out again for Newcastle-upon-Tyne. As I 
 was passing through Chapel-Town, I got a dreadful fall 
 from my horse. My foot was much hurt, but all my 
 bone.-, were preserved, glory be to God and the Lamb! 
 I rode with much pain to Newcastle, but enjoyed great 
 9*
 
 102 
 
 EXPERIENCE Of 
 
 peace and a calm resignation to the Divine will. This 
 I believe was a gracious dispensation, and was sent to 
 humble me, and prepare me for a greater trial. 
 
 Jtugust 15. My dear wife took a fever. She had 
 great pain and heavy affliction for about ten days, to- 
 gether with many violent temptations. But she enjoy- 
 ed perfect peace, and was fully resigned to the will of 
 her Heavenly Father. At last she triumphed over 
 death, and without a doubt, a sigh, or a groan, breathed 
 out her happy soul into the arms of her adorable Re- 
 deemer! 
 
 On the 28th, Mr. Massiot preached her funeral ser- 
 mon to a very large congregation of true mourners.-— 
 The same evening she was interred amongst her ances- 
 tors, in Ryton Church. She was an agreeable, affection- 
 ate wife, a constant friend, and a pious, humble Chris- 
 tian. She is now in Paradise, and I am left to mourn. 
 
 O may our heart and mind 
 
 Continually ascend, 
 That Haven of repose to find, 
 
 Where all our labours end; 
 Where all our grief is o'er, 
 
 Our suff'rings and our pain: 
 Who met on that Eternal Shore, 
 
 Shall never part again. 
 
 September 15. I once more embarked for Ireland, 
 with Mr. Murlin, Olivers, Gilbert, and Massiot. On 
 the 19th we were within sight of land, and being well 
 satisfied with a tedious and dangerous passage, we left 
 the ship and got into a fishing boat, and after rowing 
 very hard for some hours, landed at Robertson's Cove, 
 about twenty miles from Cork. We were poor stran- 
 gers now in a strange land, among a people of a strange 
 i',iguao;e. There was not one inn, or piivate house in 
 the little village that could give us a night's lodging. It 
 was a gloomy time. The day was gone, and we stood 
 looking one at another like a company of poor prison- 
 ers. In these circumstances, God sent us an honest far- 
 mer, who was a papist, and he took us home to his house 
 in the country, and shewed us great kindness. We 
 lodged that night in the midst of our enemies, but the 
 Lord suffered no man to hurt us. The next morning 
 cur kind host provided us horses, and sent a servant 
 to conduct us safe to Cork.
 
 MR. CHRISTOPHER HOPPER. 103 
 
 Here we met with a kind reception. Our friends re- 
 joiced with us, and praised Gud for all cur deliver- 
 ances. I lodged with old Mr Massiot, who kept a house 
 too well provided tor pilgrims. I spent a few days in 
 that city, preached night and morning, and visited the 
 brethren from house to house. I hope good was done. 
 
 I then set out for Dublin, where I spent my winter 
 with pleasure and profit. 
 
 The spring following I returned to Cork, where I 
 spent about two months. I found much satisfaction, 
 but not without temptations. I met with reproaches, 
 and many cruel mockings, but found that spirit resting 
 upon me, which gave me victory over reproach and 
 shame. 
 
 I then rode to Limerick, where I spent a few weeks. 
 I met with some severe trials in that city, but God de- 
 livered me. I then set out for Dublin. 1 found my 
 body and mind very weak, yet not without many kind 
 visits from my dear Lord. 
 
 In autumn I took a sore fever. Doctor Rutty, that 
 venerable and wise physician, attended me faithfully, 
 without fee or reward. He thought my labours under 
 the sun were ended. I bid farewell to' the world. I 
 was kept in perfect peace, patient and resigned to the 
 will of my Heavenly Father. I had comfortable and 
 clear views of Paradise, and a world of happy spirits. 
 When to all appearance, I was just on the brink of 
 eternity, I fell into a sweet rest, and dreamt I was de. A, 
 and saw all things prepared for my funeral, and that 
 my spirit was with Christ, in a state of unspeakable 
 happiness, but was sent back again to call a few more 
 sinners to repentance. 
 
 I then awoke, my fever was gone, and from that mo- 
 ment 1 began to recover. My strength of body soon 
 returned, and the Lord sent me forth with a fresh com- 
 mission. 
 
 I laboured in Ireland till July, 1758, and then em- 
 barked for England with, Mr. Johnson, Greenwood, and 
 Gilberts. We had a fine gale, and soon landed at Park- 
 gate. 1 then rode to Bristol. Our conference began 
 August 10. It was a good season. God crowned our 
 meeting with love and unauimity. 
 
 The latter end of September 1 arrived once more at 
 the Orphan-house, without Pilgrim street gate, Newcas-
 
 104 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 tle-upon-Tyne. My good old friends were glad to see 
 me, and received me as one raised from the dead. 
 
 In the latter end of this year, 1 had som? thoughts on 
 changing my life again. 1 prayed for Divine direction, 
 and took the advice of some of my dear fiends. One 
 who loved me. and wished me well, recommended to me 
 an agreeable person of a fair character, and on April 
 17, 1759, we were married at St. Andrews, Newcastle- 
 upon-Tyne. God made his face to shine upon us, and 
 blessed us, and amply rewarded me for all my days of 
 mourning. He doubly restored to me all spiritual and 
 temporal blessings. This was a day of prosperity, 
 therefore 1 thought it a day of great danger. 
 
 I was now favoured with an agreeable, loving com- 
 panion, a good house, a pleasant situation, and all things 
 to make life easy and comfortable. 1 must confess 1 found 
 a desire to settle, but not to leave my dear Master's 
 work. 1 began a little business, and had now a fair op- 
 portunity to step into the world, but my dear Lord 
 would not suffer me. He shewed me that his good work 
 would bring me far more gain in the end, than all the 
 shops in Newcastle. So 1 set out for the north, and 
 preached at Placey, orpeth, Alnwick, Berwick, Dun- 
 dee, usselborough, Leith, New and Old Aberdeen, 
 Peterhead, and then returned to Newcastle the same 
 way. 
 
 I then set out for the London conference, visited Can- 
 terbury and Dover, returned to London, and then rode 
 back to Newcastle. Id all those journeys 1 found the 
 Lord was with me, and gave his word success. 
 
 In the year 1760, 1 again visited Scotland. The work 
 of the Lord prospered in our hands. Sinners were con- 
 verted, mourners comforted, and the saints built up in 
 theii most holy faith. We had now a fair prospect of a 
 gieat harvest in North-Britain, till men of corrupt minds 
 sti> red up the spirit of vain controversy; we then spent 
 our time and strength about the meaning of words, in- 
 stead of promoting the fear and love of God. My soul 
 was troubled, and my spirit g' ieved within me, 'o see so 
 main precious souls turned out of the way of holiness 
 and happiness, by noisy disputes and foolish jangling. 
 These men will blush in the last day who have done this 
 great evil. Let me live with men of peace, who love
 
 MR. CHRISTOPHER HOPPER. ]0o 
 
 God and the brethren, and enjoy the life of religion in 
 their own souls. 
 
 April 28, 1761, Mr. Wesley came to Edinburgh, and 
 the Lord gave his word success. Sinners heard with 
 attention, and the saints rejoiced in God their Saviour. 
 
 I visited Dundee and Aberdeen, returned to Edinburgh 
 and from thence to Newcastle-upon-Tyne, where God 
 blessed his own word. 1 then set out with Mr. Wesley, 
 and several of the brethren, for Durham. Mr. Wesley 
 preached in a green field, by the river-side, to a very 
 large auditory. One poor man was favoured with a stone, 
 and lost a little biood; but in general they behaved tolera- 
 bly well. ! preached in the evening, in the same field, to 
 a large congregation. A gentleman, so called, employed 
 a base man to strip himself naked, and swim through 
 the river to disturb the hearers; but a good woman soon 
 hissed him off the stage, so he was glad to return by the 
 way he came, with much disgrace. Mr. John Greenwood 
 informed me afterwards, that the very gentleman who 
 encouraged the poor wretch above mentioned, wa9 some 
 time after found drowned in the same river. O God! 
 thy judgments are unsearchable, and thy ways past find- 
 ing out ! 
 
 In August I left Newcastle, and set out with my wife 
 for London. It was a disagreeable journey, but God 
 blessed and preserved us from all evil. September, 1, 
 our conference began. On the 22d, King George the 
 third was crowned. Royalty was conspicously display- 
 ed, and the glory of this present world set forth in all its 
 splendor. But Kings must die, and then all their glory 
 shall vanish away. 
 
 In July, 1763, I set out for London. Our conference 
 began and ended in love. I then set out tor Scotland. I 
 spent my winter in Edinburgh, Dunbar and Berwick. 
 We lived in a little dark room at Edinburgh, encompas- 
 sed round with old black walls, disagreeable enough: but 
 we had a good season, many poor sinners were convert- 
 ed to God. We saw the fruit of our labours and rejoic- 
 ed. My dear Edinburgh friends were very kind, espe- 
 cially Lady Gardiner, that good old saint, who is now 
 with Jesus in Paradise Praise God for all his mercies. 
 
 In the year 1764, I continued labouring in Scotland. 
 On June, 1, I set oat with Mr. Wesley, and my wife, for
 
 106 feXHERIENCE OF 
 
 Aberdeen. We had a pleasant and profitabe journey. 
 This summer we laid the foundation of our Octagon at 
 Aberdeen. The Lord gave me success. Many precious 
 souls were awakened, and added to the general assembly 
 ^nd church of the First born, which are enrolled in hea- 
 ven. 
 
 November 13, we set out for Edinburgh, and rode to 
 Dundee. The 15th, we rode to Kinghorn, and the next 
 morning crossed the Firth, and took the stage to Edin- 
 burgh. Our friends received us with joy, and we prais- 
 ed God together. 
 
 In the year 1765, we laid the foundation of our octagon 
 at Edinburgh. I met with much opposition, and many 
 discouragements, but the Lord was on my side, and 
 helped me. T collected all 1 could, gave all 1 could spare, 
 and borrowed above three hundred pounds to carry on 
 and complete that building. 
 
 I preached on the foundation one Sabbath day to a 
 large congregation. The power of the Lord was pre- 
 sent to heal, and many rejoiced to see that day. I 
 preached every Lord's day on the Ca'ton Hill, a large 
 Golgotha ! a place of a scull 1 By preaching so often in 
 the cold air, to very large auditories, with other diffi- 
 culties and hard labours, I laid the foundation of a very 
 dangerous disorder in my bowels, which baffled all the 
 skill of physicians, and the virtue of medicine, for more 
 than three years. Btit 1 could say. 
 
 Let sickness blast, and death devour, 
 
 If Heav'n will recompense our pains-: 
 Perish the grass, and fade the flow'r, 
 Since firm the word of God remains. 
 
 In July I set out for England. 1 spent a few days at 
 Newcastle-upon-Tyne, and then rode to Manchester. 
 Our conference began the 20th of August, and ended the 
 23d. . God refreshed us. 1 visited the brethren, and 
 then set out for the North. 
 
 In October Mr. Alexander Coats died at the Orphan- 
 House, in perfect peace. 1 saw him fall asleep in the 
 arms of our adorable Saviour, without a douht. Farewell, 
 my brother, for a season! but we shall meet again to part 
 no more. 
 
 In the year 1766, 1 laboured in Newcastle circuit, but 
 was very much indisposed, 1 was just worn out. My 
 bodily strength failed. 1 was on the verge ofeternity.
 
 MR. CHRISTOPHER HOPPER. JO? 
 
 But blessed be God, 1 enjoyed great tranquility of mind, 
 and very good spit its 
 
 Accepting- my pain, 
 
 1 no long-er complain. 
 But wait till at last I the Haven obtain. 
 
 Tiir the storms are all o'er, 
 
 And afflicted no more, 
 On a plank of the Ship I escape to the shore. 
 
 February 20. That old saint, He iry • Jackson, died 
 full of love, being ninety-nine years and five months old. 
 Let me die his death. 
 
 Au-ust 12. Our conference began at Leeds. We en- 
 joyed a solemn sense of the prepense of God. We met, 
 and parted in love. 1 then rode to Newcastle, and spent 
 a few months in that circuit. My disorder continued, 
 hut 1 could say, "When 1 am weak, then 1 am strong." 
 
 In July, 1767, I set out for London. God was with 
 
 me, and gave me will and power to preach his word 
 
 August 18, our conference began. Dear Mr. Whitefield, 
 and honest Howell Harris attended. All was love; all 
 was harmony : it was a pentecost indeed. 
 
 On Tuesday, August 1. 1769, our conference began at 
 Leeds. The Spirit of G<>d rested upon us, and made us 
 of one mind and judgment. 
 
 In the latter end of July, 1770, I rode to London.— 
 Our conference began August the 7th. The Lord pie- 
 sided over us, and madj it a time of love. I then set 
 out for Birstalj where I had laboured two years with great 
 satisfaction, and I hope with some success. 
 
 In the year 1771, the Calvinists proclaimed open war 
 against the Remonstrants. In August, several of them 
 met at our conference in Bristol : but their strength 
 failed; they could do nothing. For truth is great, and 
 will prevail. 
 
 The two following years I laboured in Newcastle cir- 
 cuit, among my dear friends and countrymen, whom I 
 love for the truth's sake. Great things hath the Lord 
 done in that part of his vineyard. 
 
 In toe year 1774, I was appointed at the Bristol con- 
 ference tor Liverpool circuit. I tjok leave of my dear 
 Newcastle friends with amch reluctancy. and set out 
 with my wife for Lancashire. September 26 we i eaihed 
 Bui ton in the Muurs, where we met with a friendly re- 
 ception. We lodged with honest George Eskrick. The
 
 10S EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 presence of the Lord dwelt with us, and we enjoyed 
 great peace. 
 
 In the year 1775, I removed to Liverpool, where I 
 spent a few months with pleasure and profit: I found 
 much love both to the place and people. They bore with 
 my bodily weakness, and refreshed me in the Lord. 
 
 In July, 1776, I left Bolton, and set out for London. 
 Our conference began the first Tuesday in August. The 
 shout of a King was in the midst of us, and we prai ed 
 God together for all that he had done. I spent a few 
 days in that great city; preached the word, visited a few 
 dear Christian friends, and then set out for Manchester. 
 
 November 7, 1 set out once more for Ireland. The 8, 
 1 reached Conway, the 9th, Holy-Head/ the 10th, 1 em- 
 barked and after a dangerous passage, landed that eve- 
 ning in Dublin. 1 preached every evening at Wood street, 
 to a large auditory. God blessed his word, and ga^e me 
 success. 1 visited a few poor backsliders, who were glad 
 to see the face ofan old friend. May God resiore them for 
 Chi i-.t's sake! Monday the 24th, I embarked for England". 
 25th, landed at the Head, and took the stage for Conway. 
 26th, 1 came to Chester, and the 28th, to Manchester ; 
 where, my wife and friends received me with great joy. 
 We praised God for trials and blessings. 
 
 In the latter end nf'July. 1777, 1 set out for Bristol. 
 1 visited the. principal societies in my way, and God gave 
 me strength of body and peace of mind. Our conference 
 began the first Tuesday in August. We had a good sea- 
 son. Love to God and man crowned our meeting. 1 
 then rode to Manchester, and spent a few days with my 
 old friends. 1 published the word of salvation in Sal- 
 ford, on the sabbath-day, to a large congregation. Some 
 of our mistaken churchmen presented the fire-engine: 
 but their strength failed they could d • nothing; This 
 vain •> tempt seemed t> be the last effort of a couquered 
 enem . . 1 then set out for Bradforth in Yorkshire, where 
 1 spent an agrecebleyear with Mr. Benson, and my dear 
 fiends. 1 hope our week labours were made a blessing 
 to many 
 
 In the year 1778, our conference began at Leeds, the 
 fii day in August. 1 was stationed another year, 
 
 with Mr. Murlinand Johnson, in Bradforth circuit. We 
 labo eh together in love. God was with us, and gave 
 us succi
 
 MR. 0HRI9T0PHER H0PPKB. 109 
 
 r 
 
 August 25, 1779, 1 took my leave of our dear friends 
 at Bradforth, and set out with my wife for Coin. I met 
 with many agreeable, and some disagreeable things. 
 The grand enemy had wounded many, who, I hope, are 
 now healed again. We have had a severe winter, 
 many crosses and trials, and many blessings. The Lord 
 hath owned our weak labours, and given us a little suc- 
 cess. The last time I visited the classes, in this circuit, 
 we added tb'irty eight to our number, twenty -three to the 
 church of the living God, who had found remission of 
 sins through the blood of our adorable Saviour. Nine 
 have died in peace, and are now with the spirits of just 
 men made perfect in the paradise of God. t 
 
 I can say but little about the controversy between the 
 Calvinian brethren and the Arminians. I believe Christ 
 tasted death for every man, but I do not love contention. 
 I am no disputant; I therfore leave polemical divinity to 
 men of learning, abilities and experience. I can only say, 
 I have been greatly humbled for my sins. I know in 
 whom I have believed. I know God is love. I know it by 
 experience. He hath loved me, and given his Son for 
 me. I have peace with God, through faith in the blood 
 of Christ. 1 am at peace with all the Saints; with all 
 who love the Lord Jesus Christ in sincerity. I desire 
 to follow after peace with all men. I hate sin, and 
 by the grace of God I overcome it. I love holiness, 
 the whole mind that was in Christ, and I pursue it. 
 By all means I follow on, if I may apprehend that, 
 for which 1 was also apprehended of Christ Jesus. I 
 aim at, wish, and pray for all that grace, glory, and im- 
 mortality promised by the Father, and procured by the 
 son of his love. This 1 call Bible religion, genuine Chris- 
 tianity, and this religion 1 call mine. 
 
 This 1 desire to recommend to all men, by preaching his 
 word in the pulpit, in the house and in the way; in season 
 and unt uf season, according t.» my ability. 
 
 Without this religion, all names, notions, and forms, 
 among all sects and parties, are but mere parade and 
 idie show. Without repentance, witheut faith in the 
 blood of Christ, without holiness of heart and life, with- 
 out love to G id and man, all is nothing. Let all men 
 consider this weii, and pray for, and seek after this one 
 thin^ needful, that they may be saved from sin in this 
 life, ami from hell in the great day of the Lord Jesus ! 
 10
 
 THE EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 mm* mum ®inr?am< 
 
 TO THE REV. MR. JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 llererend and dear Sir, 
 
 I WAS born at Stockport, in Cheshire, in the year 
 1732. My father was fond of me to excess. I went to 
 school til) I was thirteen, and there contracted such ac- 
 quaintance a9 led me into every kind of folly, dancing, 
 plays, racing, cock-fighting, and the like, which had laid 
 a foundation for all the vices incident to youth. Indeed, 
 the spirit of God was daily striving with me, but my 
 companions made all his strivings ineffectual. 
 
 My father designed to give me a liberal education, 
 and accordingly put me to the grammar school; but being 
 reduced in the world, he soon took me from school into 
 the shop, where I remained some years. 
 
 The Methodists then coming to Stockport, I was great- 
 ly prejudiced against them, and knowing one of them, 
 called upon him, and laboured much to convince him 
 they were of a bad religion, and were enemies to the 
 church. But he soon convinced me that I had no reli- 
 gion at all, so I came near him no more. But I began 
 to feel myself a sinner, and resolved to drop all my ac- 
 quaintance and diversions, and to keep close to the 
 church, and repeat the prayers and collects every day. 
 
 Accordingly I dropped them at once, notwithstanding 
 all the arguments and expostulations of my companions. 
 I read, prayed, fasted, went to church, and seemed more 
 and more resolved, till, after a few months, several young 
 men of my acquaintance came from Manchester on the 
 Lord's day, to an inn just opposite to our house, and sent 
 over for me. My father pressing me to go, I went, only 
 resolving not to stay long. But I soon forgot this, and 
 all my good resolution*. When I came home at night, 
 I was in an agony. I did not dare to pray. My con-
 
 lift. JOHN OLIVER 111 
 
 science stared me in the face, and the terror I felt was 
 inconceivable. 
 
 It was soon spread abroad that I was melancholy. A 
 neighbour, who was a hearer of the Methodists, sent me 
 word there was to be preaching that night. My father 
 declared, "If I went, he would knock my brains out, 
 though he should be hanged for it." However, I stole 
 away. The preacher was John Appleton, who invite 1 
 all that were weary and heavy laden, to come to Jesu3. 
 It was balm to my soul. I drank it in with all my heart, 
 and began to seek God as I had not done before. Till 
 now, I thought of saving myself. My cry now was, •♦Lord, 
 save or I perish." Yet I knew not how to go on, till 
 one sent me word there was a person at her house who 
 would be glad to see me. It was Miss Simpson. She 
 told me the manner of her conversation to God. She 
 sung an hymn, and went to prayer. I was all in a flame 
 to know these things for myself. As soon as I got home 
 1 went to prayer, and pleaded the merits of Christ. — 
 Suddenly I thought I heard a clear voice saying, "Son, 
 thy sins, which are many, are forgiven." 1 cried out, 
 "Lord, if this be from thy spirit, let the words be ap- 
 plied with power." Instantly I heard a second time, 
 "Son, thy sins, which are many, are forgiven thee." In 
 that instant all my load was gone, and I felt such a 
 change as cannot be expressed. [ loved God: I loved all 
 mankind. I could not tell whether I was in the body 
 or out of it. Prayer was turned into wonder, love and 
 praise. 
 
 In this happy state, I remained for several months, 
 feeling nothing in my heart but love. Yet I wanted 
 some agreeable companions, and I thought over all the 
 people I knew, 1 could not recollect any of our church 
 that were such as 1 wanted: no, nor among any of the 
 Dissenters or Quakers. The last people 1 thought of 
 were the Methodists: I found my soul united to them. 
 I took an opportunity of asking one of them, Robert An- 
 derson, "what were the terms of admission among them?" 
 he told me, "These:" putting the Rules of the Society 
 into my hands, and desiring me to read and consider 
 them. Having done this, I told him there was one rule 
 which 1 was afraid 1 could not keep: "Meeting every 
 week:" but 1 would meet as often as 1 could. So I join- 
 ed the society in the year 1748.
 
 i IS i xriniEKcr. or 
 
 I was now tried in a manner 1 had not been before. — 
 My father was a man of violent temper, and as much as 
 he loved me, his anger quickly overcame his natural af- 
 fection. He sent to all the Methodists, threatening what 
 lie would do if any of them dared to receive me into 
 their houses. Several gentlemen of the town advised 
 him to proceed to more severe methods. He did so. fre- 
 quently breaking sticks, and sometimes chairs upon me. 
 When all this did not move me, he tried another way, 
 charging me with disobedience, and telling me 1 had 
 broke his heart, and would bring down his grey hairs 
 with sorrow to the grave. 
 
 Several clergymen then called upon me, and strove 
 lo shew me the Methodists were in the wrong. One of 
 them was Mr. Dale, lately my master, who called me 
 his child, prayed for me, wept over me, and conjured 
 me, if 1 loved my own soul, not to go among those people 
 any more. My father promised, before Mr. Dale, 1 
 should go to church prayers every day, and have every 
 indulgence I could wish, "provided 1 would come no 
 more near those d — ned villians." I told him I would 
 do every thing in my power, as a child to a parent, to 
 oblige him : but this was a thing that affected my con- 
 science, which therefore I could not give up. 
 
 Our society was now much united together, and did 
 indeed love as brethren. Some of them had just began 
 to meet in band, and invited me to meet with them. 
 Here, one of them speaking of the wickedness of his 
 heart, 1 was greatly surprised ; telling them, 1 felt no 
 such things, my heart being kept in peace and love all 
 the day long. But it was not a week before 1 felt the 
 swelling of pride, and the storms of anger and self-will : 
 so when I met again, 1 could speak the same language 
 with them. We sympathised with each other, prayed 
 for each other, and believed that God was able and wil- 
 ling to purify our hearts from all sin. 
 
 Slot long after, having given way to temptation, and 
 grieved the Holy Spirit of God, all his comforts were 
 withdrawn in a moment : my soul was all over darkness : 
 I could no longer see him that is invisible : I could not 
 feel his influence on my heart: I sought him, but could 
 not find him. I endeavoured to pray, but the heavens 
 seemed like brass. At the same time, such a weight
 
 MR. JOHN OLIVKIl. 1 1 S 
 
 came upou me, as if 1 was instantly to be pressed to 
 death. I sunk into black despair, concluding that God 
 had forgotten to be gracious. My friends strove to lift 
 up my hands ; but it yielded me no relief. I found no 
 gleam of light, no trace of hope, no token of any kind 
 for good. The devil improved this hour of darkness, tel- 
 ling me, 1 was sure to be damned ; for 1 was forsaken of 
 God, and a mere dead weight upon his people, Thus I 
 passed over several days and nights. Sleep departed 
 from me : and I scarce eat any thing, till I was reduced 
 to a mere skeleton. 
 
 One day, being able to bear no longer, 1 rose very ear- 
 ly in the morning, and went to Mr. Cheetham's at Ads- 
 wood. The family were all very tender over me, and as 
 Mr. Jaco was to preach in the evening, desired me to 
 stay. They told him my case, and he strongly encour- 
 aged me to hope in the Lord. 
 
 My father missing me, and not knowing what was be- 
 come of me, was almost distracted. He sent persons 
 round about in every road, but could learn nothing till 
 Mr. Cheetham sent a messenger to Srockport, to desire 
 he would come over. He came ; but I was afraid of go- 
 ing home, till he promised he would use no severity. 
 As soon as we came home, he sent for Dr. H — t, an ut- 
 ter stranger to all religion. In proof whereof, he imme- 
 diately took a large quantity of blood from me, blistered 
 me on the head, back, and feet, and loaded me with me- 
 dicines. For near t,vo months 1 was under his care : all 
 that time none of my friends were suffered to see me. The 
 clergymen, Messrs. Richmond, Knowles, and Dale, vis- 
 ited me in their turns, and used every argument to in- 
 duce me to think of the Methodists no more. 
 
 In the mean time prayer was made for me continually 
 in the societies ; and a day was set apart for Fasting and 
 Humiliation. I believe it was in consequence of this 
 that 1 was raised up. The doctor and ministers judged 
 that 1 might go out. My design was first to visit the 
 church: but as I was going, an old acquaintance came 
 to my mind, who lived three miles off. I had a strong 
 desire to see him, and turning about went straight to his 
 house. He caught me in his arms, and said, % 'my dear 
 child, 1 am glad to see you. I always believed God 
 would deliver you. But where will you go now ?*' I 
 10 *
 
 114 EXPEDIENCE OF 
 
 saw 1 should not be peimitted to serve God at home. 
 After consulting together, we agreed, it would be best 
 for me to spend a little time at Manchester : so the next 
 day 1 went thither. As 1 was going, a gentleman met 
 me, who told my father. I was hearing Mr. Haughton 
 in the evening, when my mother having come from 
 Stockport on purpose, would not come in, but stood at 
 the door, and sent a person to tell me, one desired to 
 speak with me. When 1 came, she said, "Your father 
 is dying, and wants to see you before he dies." Being 
 exceedingly struck, 1 went with her. She took me to 
 an acquaintance, Mr. Hibbert's, in Deans-Gate. It be- 
 ing late, she said, she must stay in town all night, and 
 go off early in the morning. But they knew not what 
 to do with me ; being afraid the Methodists would come 
 and take me away. At length they shut me up in a room 
 with strong doors, and a person to guard me all night. 
 In the morning 1 was guarded home, where 1 found my 
 father as well as usual. — He did every thing he could to 
 extort a promise, that I would leave the Methodists. 
 But not prevailing, he gave the matter up, and from that 
 time 1 gained my freedom. 
 
 The week following, 1 met my brethren again. — And, 
 the thankfulness that was expressed on every side ! 1 
 found now every means was to my sou], what the river 
 Jordan was to Naaman. My strength came again, my 
 light, my life, my God ; and 1 was filled with all joy and 
 peace in believing. Indeed 1 could rot see at first, why 
 God had permitted me to pass through those deep waters. 
 But 1 now see it was, that 1 might sympathize with 
 other afflicted souls from heait-felt experience. 
 
 Soon after, it was strongly impressed on my mind, 
 that God had called me to some more public work. I 
 was then a leader, and had occasionally exhorted, but 
 with fear and trembling. For some time, 1 resided the 
 -thought, fearing it was a device of the ilevil : 1 earnestly 
 sought the Lord by fasting and prayer : 1 poured out my 
 supplication against it. But the more 1 strove and pray- 
 ed, the more the thought was pressed upon my mind. 
 
 Mr. Bennet was then in connexion with you, sir. 
 "We were intimate, and loved each other dearly. 1 told 
 him all that was in my heart. He asked, "whatoan in- 
 duce you to undertake such a work as this r" 1 answer-
 
 MR. JOHN OLIVER. 115 
 
 ed, "It can be no view of gain ; for 1 am getting money 
 every vear, and want nothing. It is not pride : 1 want 
 no priase of men It is a tender regard for my fellow- 
 creaturefti I have had much forgiven, and 1 now Jove 
 much. And if I could be an instrument of saving but 
 one soul, it would make amends for the labour of all my 
 life : and I think 1 am called of God thereto." He said, 
 "then go in God's name." 
 
 On December £6, in the year 1751, Mr. Bennet wrote 
 me a letter, wherein he desired me to meet him at Man- 
 chester, and go a round with him. 1 met him there, and 
 we rode together to Bolton, where notice had been given 
 of*hjs preaching. When the hour was come, he abso- 
 lutely refused t;» preach : but after Mr. Mitchell had gi- 
 ven an exhortation, got up on one of the forms, and said, 
 " I have no longer any connexion with Mr. Wesley. He 
 denies the perseverance of the saints, and asserts sinless 
 perfection. Now, I desire, that all of you who are of my 
 mind will follow me." They did so, for out of an hun- 
 dred and twenty-seven, only nineteen remained. 
 
 He went on till he ctme to Stockport, where, after 
 preaching, he met the society, and told them what he had 
 done at Bolton, aud added, "now you must either take 
 me or Mr. Wesley." They all joined him but one, Mol- 
 ly Williamson. He promised to preach to them every 
 fortnight; but within a year utterly forsook them, and 
 preached at Stockport no more. 
 
 A few days after, 1 called on Molly Williamson, and 
 found her exceedingly afflicted; Mr. Bennet having ta- 
 ken away her sister and her father. She asked, what 
 can we do ? 1 said, "there is a family at Adswood, that 
 has lately come to hear, and has neither joined Mr. Ben- 
 net nor Mr. Wesley: go over and propose a weekly .neet- 
 ing at their house." They willingly accepted of the 
 proposal. We exhorted them evtvy Lord's day, and 
 met as a class every Wednesday evening. The Lurd 
 owned and blessed us: We had love and peace; only 
 we wanted the preachers in connexion with you. We 
 prayed for them : soon after you came yourself, preac/.ed 
 at nuon, and promised to send us preachers. Yvu did 
 so : they come once a month, and we thought ourselves 
 highly favoured f *f the Lord. 
 1 still wanted e preachers to come to Stockport: and
 
 116 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 Mr. AUwood being in the circuit, 1 asked him, whether 
 he would preach, if 1 could procure a place ? he said he 
 would. I spoke to Robert Anderson, who kept the old 
 preaching house, and he consented to his preaching 
 there. Soon after we hired a house, and had regular 
 preaching therein : and God then revived and carried 
 on his work in spite of all opposition. 
 
 In the year 1759, James Wild came into Manchester 
 circuit. He was a blessing to many, and to me in par- 
 ticular, being exceeding tender over me; and 1 believe, 
 it was in consequence of what he spoke concerning me 
 at the conference, that soon after it, 1 received a letter 
 from you sir, wherein you told me that 1 was accepted 
 on trial, as a travelling preacher, and was appointed to 
 labour in the Sheffield circuit. The news seemed to me 
 like a death warrant. I knew not what to do. I thought 
 " My abilities are by no means sufficient for the work; 
 and if I attempt it, I shall only expose myself, and bring 
 a discredit upon the Gospel." But on the other hand, 
 1 thought, " If I do not go I shall grieve Mr. Wesley, 
 and fail in my duty." After much reasoning I came 
 to this conclusion, I will go and make a trial ; if the 
 Lord owns me, and the people receive me, so long as 
 this is the case I will stay with them. If they do not 
 receive me, or if I see no fruit of my labour, I will re- 
 turn to my business. 
 
 Having prepared all things, and settled my business 
 in such a manner that 1 could return to it with credit, 1 
 was commended by the brethren to the grace of God, 
 and set out with much fear, hardly expecting to stay 
 three months in the circuit. 
 
 I thought, certainly they will despise my youth ; but 
 it was far otherwise. They bore with all my weakness- 
 es, and 1 was kindly received and tenderly treated on 
 every side. I was particularly indebted to two faithful 
 friends, M'S. G. of Kotherham, and E. B. of Woodseats. 
 They were as nursing mothers to roe on all occasions. 
 Whenever my mind was burdened, 1 impaited to them 
 ail my trials^ and they lifted up my hands. 
 
 The circuit being b'ng, the preachers seldom 9aw 
 each other but on the quarter day. But the people lo- 
 ved us, and we loved one another; so that 1 got the 
 year through much better than 1 expected, And 1 did
 
 MR. JOHN OLIVER. 11T 
 
 sot run in vain; 1 did see in various places a little 
 fruit of of my labour. But I was not satisfied with this: 
 I wanted all the people to be converted to God. And 
 fearing I took up the place of some more useful preach- 
 er than I was, or ever should be, at the close of the year 
 1 wrote to you, sir, desiring I might go home. You wrote 
 to me, " You have set your hand to the gospel plough, 
 therefore never look back. I would have you come up 
 to London this winter. Here is every thing to make 
 the man of God perfect." I was then in the Haworth 
 circuit with good Mr. Grimshaw, who shewed me great 
 kindness. He did not let me go without much reluc- 
 tance. While I was upon the road, I found my heart 
 thoroughly engaged in the work of God, and determin- 
 ed to give up all: yet when I came within sight of Lon- 
 don, my spirit* began to sink, having been always of a 
 fearful temper, which, indeed, continues to this day. 
 And when 1 came into the great city, every thing ap- 
 peared strange to me. All the people were strangers 
 to me, and I to them: but we soon knew one another. 
 The longer I stayed, the better I liked every thing 
 round about me. I found your words true; "Here is 
 every thing to make the man of God perfect." 
 
 Soon after I received a letter from Thomas Mitchell, 
 at Norwich, earnestly pressing me to come and help 
 him. Having consulted with my brethren, I went: but 
 as soon as I came, T. Mitchell went away ; so I was 
 left alone for above two months, having care enough up- 
 on my hands, more than ever I had had before, beside, 
 the preaching sixteen or seventeen times a week. Be- 
 ing almost worn out, I wrote to you, Sir, desiring 
 you would send me some assistance. In the mean time 
 my situation wa6 made a blessing to me, causing me to 
 give myself much to prayer. 
 
 Just at this time a good providence sent to Norwich, 
 that saint of God, Jane Cooper. I have great reason 
 to praise God on her account. She was a general bles- 
 sing to the people. By her conversation and prayer, 
 many, both of the young beginners and old standers, 
 were stirred up : many sound remission of sins, and 
 many were renewed in love ; so that we had gracious 
 showers on every side. She advised me to declare the 
 whole counsel of God. "Enforce." said she, "a present
 
 118 BXFERINCE O* 
 
 and full salvation. Many will hate you for so doing, 
 but God will love you; and many believe, and feel the 
 force of his word. Therefore my brother be strong, be 
 bold !" Her name is precious to me to this day. 
 
 After her came another of like spirit, Paul Green- 
 wood; at the sight of whom my spirit revived, I think 
 as much as Jacob's did, when he saw Joseph's waggons. 
 We laboured together in much love, and not without 
 success. He was a man of a truly excellent temper, 
 and exemplary behaviour. He was constantly serious, 
 but not sad; he was always cheerful, but not light. 
 And the people drank into the same spirit, so that the 
 year passed very agreeably- 
 
 In the year 1761, my scrupulous disorder appeared, 
 and grew more and more troublesome, I applied to an 
 eminent surgeon, but was a little better. In spring 1762, 
 I went to Canterbury : here I had the happiness of con- 
 versing with Mr. Charles Perronet, a man of much pain 
 and sorrow, but dead to all things here below, and deep- 
 ly devoted to God. By him I profited much. He want- 
 ed to be all spirit : so did I. And we met once a week 
 with a few friends who were like minded. I bless God 
 that I ever saw them. 
 
 This summer there wasa great pouring out of the spir- 
 it in London, and many were athirst for the whole chris- 
 tian salvation : so was I. 1 loved the very name of it. 
 1 loved to hear it spoken of. 1 loved all the people that 
 were in pursuit of it, and was never so happy as in their 
 company and conversation. This was before those ex- 
 travagancies crept in. My soul was sweetly united to 
 them. 1 caught their spirit, and felt such zeal for preach- 
 ing a present and full salvation, that wherever 1 was, I 
 preached it to all believers in the best manner I could. 
 This soon had its use, both upon the people, and upon 
 my own soul. 1 was convinced more deeply than ever 
 of inbred sin, and of the promise of God to save me from 
 it. And never did man at a bar plead harder for life, 
 than 1 pleaded with God for this salvation. 
 
 Mr. Perk, of Lincolns Inn, then a sober rational chris- 
 tian, desi . ed me one day to call and dine with him. 1 
 there unexpectedly met with Messrs. Colley, Jay, 
 Coughlan, Bell, Owen, and some others. When din- 
 ner was over, one said, " Our Lord has promised, what-
 
 UK. JOHN OLIVES. 119 
 
 soever two or three of you si a ! ! agree to ask in my name. 
 1 will do it We agree now." An hymn wa9 sung. It 
 teemed as if the gloiy of the Lord filled the place. We 
 went to prayer. A general cry arose, but without any 
 confusion. The Lord was moved by our instant pray- 
 er, and we had the petition we asked of him. I was 
 baptised as with the Holy Ghost and with fire, and felt 
 that perfect love casteth out fear. Great was our fellow- 
 ship with the Father, the Son, and th; Holy Spirit. 
 After an hour spent in supplication and thanksgiving, 
 we sung from the ground of our hearts, 
 
 "Hang our new-born souls on thee, 
 Kept from all idolatry; 
 Nothing 1 want, beneath, above ! 
 Happy, happy in thy love." 
 
 IT ever 1 had access to the throne of grace, it was on 
 this memorable day. Our Lord was inexpressibly 
 near : it seemed we might ask and have whatever we 
 wanted. And we were exceedingly drawn out in 
 prayer for you, your sons in the gospel, and the people 
 under your care, feeling the communion of saint, both 
 on earth below, and in heaven above. But in all this 
 there was nothing wild ; but all calmness, meekness, 
 love and peace. 
 
 From this time I went forth in the power and spirit 
 of love; I felt nothing but love, and desired nothing but 
 more love. And so I continued without any intermis- 
 sion all the time 1 remained in London. 
 
 I could now understand that objection commonly made 
 against those who long to be all devoted to God, "That 
 they do not love to converse with other people, with 
 many but those of their own sort." How little spiri- 
 tual conversation is to found among other people! — 
 Among any that are not going on to perfection! Gene- 
 rally the tenor of their conversation is dry, lifeless, and 
 useless. But those who are earnestly going on, hardly 
 care to talk of any thing else. And whatever conver- 
 sation ha3 no favour of this, is dull and insipid to them. 
 
 From that day to this I have not lost my sight of, nor 
 my affection for, Christian Perfection. But I have been 
 pressed down by the exercises of every kind which I 
 have passed through since that time. I fear some of
 
 120 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 them were purposely laid in my way by those who were 
 no friends to this doctrine, and who were not greatly 
 pleased with me for enforcing it in every place. But 1 
 willingly leave this and all my affairs to the disposal of 
 a wife and gracious Providence. 
 
 The next year I was at Bristol with Mr. Oddie, and 
 was happy both with him and with the people. My heart 
 was given up; 1 was all athirst for God, and wanted 
 every thought to be holiness to the Lord. Jesus was 
 the first beauty to my soul. He reigned alone in my 
 heart. I was entirely and constantly happy in God. 
 He was my all in all. 
 
 In 17C4. 1 was again stationed in London. My dis- 
 order now increasing much, 1 was advised to apply 
 without loss of time to Mr. Morley, a gentleman of 
 Halstead, in Essex. I went down without delay. He 
 behaved like a gentleman and a Christian. He first 
 prayed that God would bless his endeavours; and after 
 enquiring minutely into my case, told me my whole 
 mass of blood was corrupted. He therefore advised me 
 to an entire milk diet; to take a quart of milk every 
 day, with some white bread, and two table spoons full 
 of clarified honey. In six months mv whole habit of 
 body was changed, nor have 1 had any thing of my dis- 
 order since. 
 
 The next year 1 spent with Mr. Oddie in the Man- 
 chester circuit. We bad some severe trials; but going 
 on hand in hand, we were more than conquerors.— 
 "Where preachers are united, nothing can hurt them; 
 where they are not, nothing can help them. 
 
 The year following, 1 was appointed for Newcastle- 
 upon-Tyne, where 1 found a most agreeable family.— 
 And 1 never met with a people who valued the preach- 
 ers like those in this circuit. Their spirit and their 
 conduct, throughout the whole, was "courteous, pitiful, 
 and kind." 
 
 Afterwards 1 spent two years in Leeds Circuit, two 
 in Brad forth, and two in Bir->tal circuit Always when I 
 go into a new round, 1 go with great heaviues ; but af- 
 ter a while, i so cleave to the people that 1 know not 
 how to leave them. 
 
 In the year 1773, I was removed to Chester circuit, 
 where 1 continued two years. In the second year 1 was
 
 MR. JOHN OLIVER. 121 
 
 invited to Wrexham. The house being (oo small for the 
 congregation, I was desired to preach abroad, which I 
 accordingly did, to about a thousand serious hearers. 
 While I was speaking, a constable came with orders from 
 a neighbouring justice to apprehend me. I desired him 
 to stay till I had done my discourse, and I would go with 
 him. He agreed so to do; but the Justice impatient of 
 delay, came himself, and seized me by the collar. I 
 said, '' Sir, here is no riot; all is peaceable; and 1 am a 
 licenced preacher." Notwithstanding, he dragged me on, 
 till he saw the constable, and then charged him to carry 
 me to Bridewell. As we were walking, I told the con- 
 stable, '• I wdl not go, unless you have a written order." 
 He went to the justice, and returned with the following 
 order, which I have by me. 
 
 (t This is to order the constables of Wrexham, and 
 Thomas Price in particular; safely to convey the body 
 of Oliver, a vagrant preacher, who hath unlaw- 
 fully assembled a concourse of people in the School -yard 
 against the peace of our sovereign lord, the king, to the 
 house of correction, in the town of Wrexham And like- 
 wise, to order the keeper of the saM house, to receive 
 
 and safely keep the body of him. the said Oliver, 
 
 for further examination, and that he may be dealt with 
 according to law. 
 
 "Given under my hand and seal; this tenth day of 
 June, 1774. 
 
 THO. BOYCOTT." 
 
 As I was walking with the constable towards Bridge- 
 well, there was such a concourse of people, that it was 
 with difficulty we got through them. The house was 
 soon filled with people of all ranks, who expressed all 
 possible kindness. One gentleman said, "'Sir, I will be 
 bound with you for 500/. Another said, "You shall 
 preach at my door, and let them disturb you that d?re." 
 I had now an oportuuity of explaining to them the reli- 
 gion which we wish to propagate in every place. 1 then 
 went to prayer, wherein 1 wa>* greatly refreshed, and most 
 of the t eopl'e were deeply affected. Maiv would lain 
 have stayed with me ail night, but 1 would not suffer it 
 11
 
 222 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 At ninein the morning I was ordered to appear before 
 the Justice, with whom I found the high sherif and an 
 attorney. He asked for my licence, which I gave him; 
 he lead it and said, it was good for nothing. I said, "Sir, 
 it was never questioned before, and the questioning the 
 validity of it now, is a reflection upon the whole bench 
 of justices, who gave it me in open court." The attor- 
 ney then beginning to interrogate me, I said, "-Sir, I am 
 under no obligation to answer impertinent questions." 
 He got up, went out, and I saw him no more. The jus- 
 tice then told me, unless I would promise to preach there 
 n" more, he would order me to be whip! out ot the town, 
 I answered, "Sir, I will make no such promise. I am an 
 Englishman. I ha\e violated none of the laws of my 
 country, and tbereforee am liable to no punishment." 
 After usinga few more contemptuous word*, he told me, I 
 might go about my business. So I took my leave of Mr. 
 Boycott, rejoicing that I was counted worthy to suffer 
 shame for my Master's sake. 
 
 The next year, 1 laboured in Sheffield circuit, where 
 was a great out-pouring of the Spirit of God. And 
 throughout the year, there appeared tobeageneral moving 
 among the people. 
 
 In the succeeding years, I was in Manchester, Liver- 
 pool, Macclesfield, and Birstal circuits. And I bless 
 God, I never was in any circuit yet, where 1 had not 
 aome seals of my mission. 
 
 God has wrought wonderfully of late in Birstal circuit. 
 He is blessing us on every side. Some hundreds have 
 within this year been added to the societies. On the 
 national fast (lav, the little society at Thong appointed 
 a prayer meeting in the evening. The spirit of $>race 
 and supplication was to poured upon them, that they con- 
 tinued till the morning. Several were in the greatest 
 agony, lving upon the ground, in cold weats, one crying 
 out "Lord, help me;" another, "Save, or 1 perish." Be- 
 fore they parted, eight were justified, and seveial renew- 
 ed in love. 
 
 I would beg leave to observe, upon the whole, that nav- 
 in» been near thirty years in the service of a good Mas- 
 ter, I have great reason to be humbled for having done so 
 Jittle for God, for my neighbour, and for myself. *G~I 
 ;might have exerted myself more in the cause of God, and
 
 Mil. ALEXANDER MATHEH. i23 
 
 have made greater improvement, both as a preacher and 
 is a Christian. {C?"God be merciful to me a sinner. 
 I am, Rev. Sir, your affectionate, 
 
 " Son in the Gospel, 
 
 JOHN OLIVER. 
 
 THE EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 TO THE REV. MR. JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 Reverend Sir, 
 
 I WAS born at Brechin, in North Britain, in Febru- 
 ary, 17S3, of reputable parents, who made it their busi- 
 ness to bring me up in the fear of God. They instruct- 
 ed me early, in the principles of religion, and took parti- 
 cular care "to keep me from evil company; so that when 
 I grew up, I was an utter stranger to the vices common 
 among men. And I took pleasure in reading good books, 
 and learning our catechims by heart. When I was at the 
 Latin school, it was the custom of our master, every 
 Lord's day, after the evening service, to hear what we 
 could remember of the sermons, and to pray with us. 
 Under one of his prayers, (when I was about ten years 
 old,) I was struck with strong convictions. And these 
 never quile left me, but I always retained a desire to be 
 a Christian. 
 
 Soon after this, out of a childish frolick, I went away 
 with a party of the rebels; but I knew not what I did. f 
 hereby exposed myself to many hardships and dangers. 
 But the Lord delivered me out of all Many mighty ones 
 fell on Cullodon Heath, and in the way to Inverness, and 
 indeed on every side; yet I was mercifully preserved. 
 Bat when I came near my father's house, there was no 
 entrance for me. And I knew not where to go, till my 
 mother resolved to take me to a relation of hers neat' 
 Perth.
 
 124 EXPERIENCE OK 
 
 We had a large river to cross, which was much swelled 
 by the late rains. We were just got into the boat, when 
 a Gentleman on horseback came and begged us to stay 
 and take him in, which we accordingly did. He seemed 
 much fatigued. My mother desired me to hold his horse 
 which I did, twisting the bridle round my hand. When 
 we were about the middle of the river, the horse took a 
 fright, and leaped out of the boat, taking me, and the 
 oars, and both the boatmen with him: so that none were 
 left in the boat but my mother and the gentleman, with- 
 out any means of helping themselve?. The horse swam 
 lo the opposite shore, dragging me with him: then turned 
 back, and swam to the shore we had left. He then jump- 
 ed out, pulling me just above the water; but I there lost 
 jny hold, and fell back into the river. It carried me down 
 rolling me over and over, till it brought me to the side of 
 the boat, which was strangly got to the same shore. They 
 catched hold of me and pulled me in. 
 
 Here I cannot but remark several providential inci- 
 dents: 1 That both the boatmen should get safe to that 
 .side of the water. 2 That when they were there, they 
 should be able to get the boat, with my mother and the 
 gentleman safe in it. 3 That the horse did not leave me 
 on the opposite side, where to all appearance, I must 
 have perished. 4 That notwithstanding the impetuosity 
 of the stream, the horse should reach the land above the 
 boat. Had it been below, I had probably been lost. I 
 admire above ail, the exact timing of every circumstance! 
 Had I been brought to the same side first, I could have 
 had no help; had the boatmen reached the opposite side 
 they in the boat could have had none. And had any o 
 us been carried but a little lower, we must inevitablj 
 have been swallowed up in a whirlpool. 
 
 After having thrown up much water, I was so far re- 
 covered as to be able to take boat again. And having 
 «-ot safe over, we travelled twelve Scotch miles, (eigh- 
 teen English) before night. But we could not travel 
 without much danger, as the country was full of parties, 
 both horse and foot, who abused all the strangers they 
 met with, and often took them prisoners. When we 
 came near a town, we enquired ot one we met, where 
 we could have a quiet lodging; she said, she could re- 
 commend us to no inn, for they would inform the sol-
 
 MR. ALEXANDER MATHER. 125 
 
 diers of us, who were very rude to all strangers, espe- 
 cially to women: but if we would put up with the house 
 of a'poor man, she knew one that she thought would re- 
 ce.Te us." So she conducted us to a little cottage, where 
 we found the man engaged in family worship. When it 
 was ended, he looked upon my mother, and said, "Good 
 wife, I have no place fit to entertain you, who appear to 
 have a good home somewhere. Neither can I protect 
 you, if the soldiers hear you are in my house. But if 
 you please to sit. by the fire, with a little straw for the 
 lad to lie on, you are welcome." They then gave us 
 something to eat and drink, which we received with 
 thankfulness to God. The good woman then laid me 
 down on the straw, and sat by my mother till the morn- 
 ing; when, having been commended to God in prayer by 
 our host, we went on our j urney. 
 
 My mother's brother was a considerable farmer, in 
 the Carse of Gowry, near Perth. Thither we got before 
 sunset, and were kindly received, till my mother told 
 him her design of leaving me there. But his wife op- 
 posed it much, fearing lest, if it was discovered, they 
 should be ruined for harbouring me. However, my un- 
 cle, seeing the distress my mother was in, over-ruled 
 her, and said, I should stay. And the next morning, he 
 sent a servant with my mother, who saw her safe home. 
 
 I stayed the Sabbath at my uncle's; but on Monday 
 morning, before sunrise, he called me, (his wife having 
 prevailed,) and told me, "You must go hence." So I set 
 off with one to guide me across the mountains. He then 
 left me to find my way as I could, to a place, and a per- 
 son £ had never heard'of before, but I had a line to the 
 man; providence brought me to the place, but the man 
 was not at home. However, he came the next day, and 
 received me kindly. Here I stayed till about midsuii ■ 
 mer, and then removed to a distant relation's, where I 
 stayed till November. It was then judged 1 might go 
 home safely: but whan I came, my father would not let 
 me come into his house. Nay, he went and made inf >r- 
 mation against metothecommandingofficer: and 1 should 
 have been sent to prison, had not a gentleman of the town 
 interfered tor me; and procured leave for me to lodge at 
 my fathei 5 s house. In the morning a file of Musqueteers 
 came, to take me into custody, and brought me to the 
 11 *
 
 126 fcXTEKlKNCE OK 
 
 officer. — At'tr asking me many questions, he told roe,, 
 '•You in a j go home.'' But when I came to the door, the 
 soldiers, not knowing his order, were a going to carry 
 ;ne to prison: till he looked out of the window, and bade 
 them let me go. However, my father would not put me 
 to school any more, but kept me to his business, that of 
 baking. 
 
 1 continued with my father till the beginning of May, 
 \T5\: when, being well acquainted with my business, I 
 determined to go abroad. I set out with another young 
 man, who was engaged in Perth. — Here a place was pro- 
 vided for me in a pious family, where I remained till af- 
 ter Christmas, Two persons then came from London; 
 with one ot whom I contracted an intimate acquaintance. 
 One Lord's dav, she asked me to go to the Kpiscopal 
 meeting. It affected me much, and from that time I at- 
 tended it whenever I could. And I cannot but say, it 
 was of great use to my soul, aud has proved so ever 
 since. 
 
 About this time I formed a purpose of going to Lon- 
 don, and having took leave of my relations, we set sail 
 from Montrose, about the middle of lune, 175:2. When 
 I came so London, I knew no one there: but the kind 
 band of God was over me. 1 found a brother of my fa- 
 ther's, who being of the same trade, took me to work with 
 him, till he procured me a place, in a serious family at 
 Billingsgate. But as I was a foreigner, my master was 
 summoned to Guildhall, and obliged to put me away. 
 In a little time I got me another place, near Whitechapel- 
 Bars. And as 1 was strong and active, my master per- 
 suaded me to engage for a year certain. Afterwards he 
 iid not use me well: till one day being in a passion, he 
 ordered me instantly to quit his house; which 1 immedi- 
 ately did. • 
 
 in the year 1753, my present wife who was born near 
 «yere 1 was, and had lived several years with my parents 
 in my infancy, heard 1 was in London, and resolved to 
 see me. We had not seen one another for many years, 
 and were both glad of the meeting: and as I was then out 
 •f p ace, we had opportunity of seeing each other frequent- 
 ly. On Feb. 14, we were married. 1 had then forgot 
 ♦he resolution* I had often made of living wholy to God, 
 whenever J should marry: but he soon brought them back.
 
 CiR. ALEXANWF.H MATHER, 1*7 
 
 to my remembrance, by laying affliction on my wife. 1 
 now began to be in good earnest for salvation: 1 bought 
 up all opportunities for. prayer. 1 resolved to break 
 through all opposition, and serve God with all my heait. 
 
 Rut still it lay heavy upon my mind, that I had not per- 
 formed my vow of praying with my wife. And my con- 
 victions increased day bv day, till my appetite wa- gone, 
 and my sleep departed from me: my bones were, filled as 
 with a sore disease, and my tears were my meat day and 
 night. 1 now broke through and prated with my wife, 
 and we never after left the practice. It was mt long af- 
 ter this, that she new God to be a pardoning God. And 
 all that summer we continued praying and striving to- 
 gether, and steadily walking in all the ordinances of 
 God. 
 
 After living; at Hamstead some time, 1 removed to a 
 place at St. Katherine's While 1 uas here, I was one 
 day going hastily along the street, and a loaded cart stood 
 in it which nearly filled it up. However 1 went on, 
 thinking I could get bv: but just as I was a going bv,it 
 moved, caught my basket, crushed me up against the 
 wall, and dragged me along till we came against a shop 
 window which gave way and released me. Every one 
 that saw it supposed that 1 should be crushed to death; or 
 at least my arms or legs would be broken. But 1 receiv- 
 ed no hurt at all, besides a little bruise on the back of 
 my hand. 
 
 In September, 1753, 1 wa9 hired to Mr. Merriot. Our 
 meeting was not expected on either side: he had been en- 
 enquiring the character of another, which he did not ap- 
 prove of: and 1 wa9 enquiring for a master when he came 
 and a9ked me if I was out of p &c D 1 answered, Y**s. He 
 asked if I would keep good hour? Which 1 pro-nis. d to 
 do. So we agreed, and I enter*. J upon h-s i-eni 
 Here I found what 1 had long desittd, a family wherpm 
 was the worship of God. This stirred me up to be more 
 tamest in seeking him: to be exact in praying by myself 
 •very morning, and with my wife eveiy afternoon. And 
 we continued seeking him with our whole heait, and 
 shu.ming wnatever wc thought offensive to him. We 
 "used likewise, every means of grace. 1 have sometimes 
 gone on my knees when 1 was going to bed, and have con- 
 tinued in that position^ till two o'clock, wheal was call- 
 ed to go to work.
 
 1&8 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 My wife nan< sometime *ince, found a decree of peaee 
 wi r V G«d. Bot I could find no peace, nor could I HI 
 wh \t hindVed, unless if were (he biking i.f pans, as they 
 called i', on the sabbath. — I wo Id gladly have refraued 
 from tlm but then 1 must have left my place, and 1 had 
 nohor/e of finding ; another place which would not ha\ ebeen 
 liable io the same inconvenience. H wever, I re>ol\ed, 
 as soon a* Christmas was o\er. to give up inv pla< e at all 
 events. Meanwhile my tie-h consumed away, like a 
 moth fretting aga<ment. And my bones were ready to 
 s'art through my skin: for I had no rest day or night. 
 The following sabbath my wife and I ventured for the 
 first time to the Holy Communion; and I found some 
 comfort; but the sense of my profaning the sabhath, soon 
 took it away. [ now resolved to delay no longer than 
 the next day. being willing to suffer lather than to sin. 
 Accordingly, on Monday morning, as soon as my mas- 
 ter came down stairs, T gave him warning: he did not then 
 speak one word: but soon after he came, into the shop, 
 and "asked me, "If I had got another place?'' I answered, 
 no. He said, "Why then would you leave this?" I an- 
 swered, "Because I dare not commit sin by breaking the 
 sabbath, as I have done." He used many arguments with 
 me, but in vain. I told him, "I must abide by the word 
 of God, whatever be the consequence: but I will not go 
 away till vou suit yourself with another man." 
 
 God now gave me much confidence, and I found much 
 power to pray, that if it is not his will we should part, he 
 would incline my master to give it up. And the same 
 day he went with a neighbouring-baker, to all of the trade 
 in Shoreditch and Bishop's-gate without: proposing that 
 they should all enter into an agreement to give it up at 
 once. All but two agreed. He then advertised for a 
 meeting of master-bakers upon the subject: but nothing 
 could be concluded. Afterwards I supposed he asked 
 the advise of our brethren at the Foundry. After he 
 had taken all these steps, more than I could reasonably 
 expect, he told me, ''I have done all I can, and now I 
 hope you will be content." I sincerely thanked him for 
 what he had done, but told him, I could n«t stay any 
 longer than till he had suited himself. But I continued 
 in piayer. And on sabbath evening, after family wor- 
 ship, he stopped jne and said, "I have done to-day
 
 MR. ALEXANDER MATHER. 1S9 
 
 what will please you: I have staved athome, and told all 
 my customers, I will bake no more on a sabbath." I told 
 him. ICT^'If you have done this out of concience toward 
 God, be assured it will end well." And so it did. That 
 very year, his trade considerably increased. And he 
 had a large augmentation of his fortune, so that he was 
 enabled to relieve many that were in want, and also to 
 lay up abundance for his children. May they herein 
 tread in their father's steps! 
 
 He then asked me, how I came to scruple baking on 
 Sundays? And I told him simply, how God had delt with 
 my soul. And I believe it was then he first felt that af- 
 fection for me, which continued to his dying day. (From 
 that time, both he and my good mistress were particular- 
 ly kind to me and mine. And when, some years after, 
 my station in London placed me in some sense over 
 them, there were none in the society that more fully sub- 
 mitted to every branch of disipline.) It was then he 
 asked me to go with him to the Foundry, which I did at 
 five the next morning. When I came back, I told my 
 wife where I had been. It grieved her much, as she be- 
 lieved all the idle reports she had heard: many of which 
 she rehearsed, and added, "Now our peace is broken for- 
 ever." This stirred me up to be more earnest in prayer, 
 but did not prevent my going every morning. On Sun- 
 day she was persuaded to go with me, though much afraid 
 of my being drawn into some wrong way. John Nelson 
 preached an alarming discourse, which 1 hoped would af- 
 fect her much. But, on the contrary, she was much dis- 
 gusted, saying, "He has shewn me the way to hell; and 
 not the way to get out of it. But I thank God, he has 
 shewn me that Jesus Christ is the way, and has brought 
 me out of it too." However she went again the next Sab- 
 bath. Mr. Charles Wesley then preached, and described 
 the whole process of the work of God in the soul. She 
 followed him step by step, till he came to the abiding wit- 
 ness of adoption, and here he left her behind. She was 
 now both pleased and profited, and we now went on 
 hand in hand, in the ways of God. But still I did not 
 find the spirit of adoption, though I sought it diligently, 
 continuing instant in prayer, and attending the word 
 every morning and evening. Indeed this was not with- 
 out difficulty: for I had no time for either, but what I
 
 130 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 took from my sleep, which should have been from six to 
 ten in the evening, and from half past four to six the in 
 morning. I now slept little a.id ate little, and the grief 
 of my soul drank up my spirits. — But yet I could not be- 
 lieve, though l continued in prayer and supplication day 
 and night, seeking God in sincerity of heart, and care- 
 fully departing from evil. 
 
 About this time my wife and I were permitted to stay 
 at the meeting of one of the classes. I was much pleas- 
 ed and refreshed: but she said, "They had all agreed 
 what to say, in order to catch us." Such is the follv of 
 prejudice! It was soon after this, that you returned from 
 the Bristol Hotwells, (being just recovered from your 
 consumption) namely, on Easter Eve, 1754. The next 
 day you preached at West-street, April the 14th: it was 
 the first time I ever saw or heard you. Under that ser- 
 mon, God get my heart at liberty, removed my sins from 
 me, as far as the East is from the West: which the very 
 change of my countenance testified, before my tongue 
 could utter it. 1 had no great transport of joy; but my 
 load was gone, and I could praise God from the ground 
 of my heait: all my sorrow, and fear, and anguish of 
 spirit being changed into a solid peace. 
 
 But on Monday, in the afternoon, as I was going along, 
 I began to think, ''You fancy your sins are forgiven 
 but you are deceived." I had but a little time given, 
 way to these thoughts, before I was quite miseiable. 
 And when 1 got home, my wife immediately asked, what 
 is the matter with you? I said, <k Matter enough: I have 
 deceived my own soul: I wish I had my sorrow again,'' 
 She strongly urged me not to reason, but believe! To look 
 unto Jesus as giving himself for me. I was encouraged. 
 I soon recovered my peace, which, by the mercy of God 
 I have not lost since. Soon after we both joined the so* 
 ciety, and met in brother Good's clas-: and this, among 
 all the means of grace, was peculaiily useful to my s^ul. 
 
 About this time my eldest brother, who u>ed the sea, 
 after being wrecked, got his passage to London. He was 
 easily convinced of sin. and soon after converted to God. 
 S • being all of one heart and one mind we rejoiced in 
 God all the day long But it was not long before 1 had 
 strong impressions upon my mind that G«kI had called 
 me to preach. I mentioned this in my band ; after I had
 
 MR. ALEXANDER MATHER. 131 
 
 often Sought God by fasting and praying. We set a part 
 seme days for the same exercises. Afterwards they ad- 
 vised me to mention it to you. You saiil, '-This is a 
 common temptation nm mg young men. Several have 
 mentioned it to me. But ihe next thing I hea <1 ol them 
 is, that they are married, or upon the point of it." 1 
 said, 'Sir I am married already." You -a d, "C-tie not 
 for it: but seek God by fasting and prayer " 1 answei ed, 
 this I have done. You strongly recommended patience 
 a (I perseverance therein^ and said', \ ou doubted not but 
 Godwould soon make the way :ain before my face 
 
 Soon after you appointed me tb;be theleadei of a band, 
 and in a little time, of a class. And God b'e^ed me in 
 both: but this did not at al! alter nv conviction that I 
 must preach; hayVitgrewstrongei aid stronger, till hav- 
 ing no rest day or night. I was constrained to come to 
 you again, and tell you just what I felt. You told me, 
 "Tube a Methodist preacher is not the way to ea-e, hon- 
 our pleasure, or profit. It is a life of much laboin and 
 reproach. — They often fare hard, often are in want. 
 They are liable to be atoned, beaten and abused in vari- 
 ous manners. Consider this, before you engage in s un- 
 comfortable a way of life." I replied, 1 had no de»ire 
 to engage therein, utiles*, it. was the call of God: and I 
 did not-egard what I suffered, i" doing the wi II of G.d." 
 You >aid, <*You may then make a trial to-morrow at 
 Snowfieids Chapel." 1 did so. The Monday following 
 you appointed me for W apping Chappel, and for the 
 Foundeiy on 'Tuesday morning. It was near ten o'clock 
 whet? I received the message. I soon went to work, but 
 was e .Mgaged in meditation and prayer all the time I was 
 making my dough — As soon as I had done, (the re t of 
 the family being in bed) I went to prayer in which I 
 found great libetty. I then read in my Bible to find a 
 text ami, continued reading and piaying till twrto'c! ek. 
 It was then time to call my fellow servant,and we we t to 
 work together, being employed, as usual, till neat f . r, 
 in preparing the bread for the oven. All this time i was 
 still in meditation and prayer, but could not fix upon a 
 text. Soon after four, he wen' to bed igain, and I went 
 to prayer, till quarter before fiw wien I went to Foundry, 
 but with much fea- and trembling: and w en i took up 
 the hymn-book, I was so faint, that 1 could not speak so
 
 132 EXPERIENCE OP 
 
 as to be understood. The people therefore could not 
 sing: and as 1 was no singer, we were at a stand. This 
 did not a iittie increase my agitati n, which was so great 
 that 1 could not keep one of my joints from shaking.— 
 However, in a while 1 went on: and after prayer, opened 
 the Bible on these words, "Ye are bought with a price; 
 therefore glorify God with your body and spirit, which 
 are God's." 1 now left the determination of this weighty 
 affair with you, desiring, that if you judged 1 was called 
 of God to preach, you would employ me, (as my business 
 would permit) just when and where you pleased. 
 
 In a little time I was more employed than my strength 
 would well allow. 1 had no time for preaching but what 
 1 took from my sleep: so that I had frequently not eight 
 hours sleep in a week. This with hard labour, constant 
 abstemiousness, and frequent fasting, brought me so low, 
 that in a little more than two years, I was hardly able to 
 follow my business. My master was otten afraid I 
 should kill myself, and perhaps his fear was not ground- 
 less. I have frequently put off my shirt as wet with 
 sweat as if they had been dipt in water. After hastening, 
 to finish my business abroad, 1 have came home all in a 
 sweat in the evening, changed my clothes, and ran to 
 preach at one or another chapel: then walked or ran 
 back, changed my clothes, and gone back to work at ten, 
 wrought hard all night and preached at five the next 
 morning, 1 ran back to diaw the bread at a quarter or 
 half an hour past six; wrought hard in the bake house till 
 eight, then hurried about with the bread till theafternoon, 
 and perhaps at night set off' again. 
 
 'Tistrue.I need not have continued so long in this way. 
 For you proposed my going to Ireland wit >oi ,a- a tra- 
 velling preacher, in the beginning of Mar ch, 1756; 1 cheer- 
 fully agreed thereto, as you promised mv wife should be 
 provided for in mv absence. This I mentioned to one of 
 my friends, who said "No doubt he intends it; but when 
 he is gone the stewards will do a» they please: adding, 
 ««H w can you labour in Ireland, while your wifeis starv- 
 ing he«e?"i thought however, 1 would talk with the stew- 
 ards myself, 1 did no, and M>. Broltsand Hobbins asked, 
 »*\Vhat will be sufficient for your wife?" 1 answered, 
 »«Fou' shillings a week." But this they were unwilling 
 to all ow - ^° * remained at my bu&iness, till another
 
 1^3 Ml!. ALKXAN!)!' :i M A. I .1 K .;> 
 
 pointed out, which I followed, till August, i;. 
 It was then agreed, tlv.it I should travel, ami tfi 
 my wile should have that fixed allowance. This 
 was t lie beginning of that settlement in* Prea'cHers' 
 wives, which (with the addition of forty shillings h 
 year) continues to this day. 
 
 I was appointed for Epworth Circuit in Lincoln- 
 shire; whifh then included Gainsborough, Grimsby, 
 and Sheffield circuits. 1 left London. August li>, 
 iTSTj to walk to Epworth, about an hundred and fif- 
 ty mi.es. M\ fellow labourers were Thomas Rati- 
 by, Trtnmas Tobias, and afterwards Thomas I. 
 It pleased (.rod, to give me much of hiw presence in 
 my own soul, arid to let me see some fruit of my la 
 hour. This supported me under the various etxoi 
 eises I met with. The first of these was at Euthei 
 bain, where John Thorpe, one of our weal preach 
 ers, had just separated from us. lie declared open 
 war against us, particularly opposing what he called 
 my perfection. Yet it pleased Gad t<* raise up ma 
 iiy witnesses of it; many that loved l^im with all 
 their hearts. Several of whom are still burning and 
 shining lights, and several remove;! into Abraham"* 
 bosom. Yea, it was observed, that some of his own 
 hearers, even while he was preaching against saha 
 lion from sin, were fully convinced of the necessity 
 of it; and indeed never rested; m:>re, till they weiv 
 haj>py witnesses of it. 
 
 In autumn 1 was desired to go to Boston. I did 
 so, and preached in a field on a Sabbath evening with 
 tolerable quietness. The next time I went, Mr. Ail 
 wood and I judged it would be best to be in the mar 
 ket-plaee* We began singing, when suddenly a 
 large mob appeared, with a drum beating be ion. 
 them: meantime a great number of squibs were 
 thrown aiming the people. Finding it was impos-i 
 bit to be heard, we purposed going to a friend's, a 
 bout a mile from the town. The moment w-e fciraeif 
 •"ir backs, the dirt and stones ilew like hail ion ev«j»j 
 j '■' On the bridge a man stoppod i«; hut«9 hv
 
 134 KXT'EUIENCE OF 
 
 from him and went on with <he mob at ours heels, 
 throwing all that came to hand. Their number eon- 
 liuuaMy increasing, we thought it would he most ad- 
 viseable to face them, and try to get hack to the town, 
 where we bad left our horses. My two companions 
 immediately leaped over a wide ditch, which divid- 
 ed the Held. But before 1 could follow them, one of 
 the mob coming behind me struck up my heels, and 
 gave me a violent fall. When I got up, my friends 
 were out of sight, and the mob surrounded me on ev- 
 iv side. I knew not which way to go. neither indeed 
 how to goat all, being exceeding weak and spent, 
 both with the fall, and the many blows I had receiv- 
 ed. Being a little recovered, 1 tried to go through 
 {hem. to a foot bridge that was* ver the ditch. They 
 forbore throwing, till 1 drew near the bridge, and 
 then all cried out, "Ditch him, diteh him." And 
 just on the side of the ditch, one truck up my heels 
 again, let he stood by me, and let me rise up, and 
 walk (juietly over the bridge. There I was in the 
 middle of the mob, and a large field to go through 
 parted from the road by high rails, which had a 
 broad diteh§on either side. When i came to the rails, 
 1 knew not how to get over, my breath being almost 
 spent. And if 1 could, I saw no likelihood of esca- 
 ping the being thrown into> the ditch. However 
 they let me crawl over without much hurt. But as 
 soon as 1 was on the road, the same person who stop- 
 ped us on the bridge collared me, to drag me to the 
 horse pond, while the rest plaisiered me over afresh 
 with dirt. But just as we came to the pond, a gen- 
 tleman called out to him that held me, ''Let the man 
 go." lie immediately let go his hold, and J passed 
 by the pond. 
 
 1 had still to walk through the whole town, my 
 horse being at the far end of it. When 1 came into 
 Ufee street, tliey got the dirt out of the kennels, jid 
 threw it in my* face. As no door was open to take 
 me in, i was obliged now and then to turn and face 
 tUcDi (otherwise they seldom looked me in the face)
 
 'BlR, ALEXANDER MATHER. 
 
 in order to get breath; Wlion I fame into the mar 
 ket place, there was a genera! shout for tke gloriou* 
 victory. Before I got to the inn, 1 was just read;, 
 to lie down, when due struck me violently, in wnler 
 to strike up my heels. But 1 kept my feet, i km» 
 not how; which I looked on as a great mercy; as 
 such a fall upon the s;ones might have done me 
 mucb hurt. At the same time one threw a stone, 
 which struck me on the temple. I then concluded, 
 I must die in their hands'. But by the mercy of God. 
 I was strangely brought through all the multitude to 
 the inn where 1 had alighted. Being sat down, my 
 first thought was, "Father! forgive them; for they 
 know not what they do." Indeed my mind (glory be 
 to God!) was kept through the whole in frerfed 
 peace. By this lime some of my friends, who had 
 followed at a distance, were come in, and were wash 
 ing my wounds when the mob came to the door, 
 threatening what they would do to the house, if th - 
 landlord did not turn me out. He came in and said, 
 *I cannot keep you here, for the mob will pull my 
 house down." 1 told him, "Sir, I am in your house; 
 but while I use it as an inn, it is mine. Turn me out 
 at your peril. If you fear your house apply to a ma- 
 gistrate for protection." He went to his lanlord. 
 who was a magistrate, and ordered him to take 
 down the names of the chief rioters. After a while 
 I mounted my horse in the yard, and then, the gate« 
 being opeued, rode through a shower of stones, awl 
 came safe to cur friend s house. But 1 waS so 
 bru ed, almost from head to foot, that when I w 
 •old I could hardly stir. And it was a full year he- 
 fore I quite recovered the hurts which 1 then re- 
 ceived. 
 
 The next day I went back with a friend to the 
 town. I soon found three of the rioters, to whom £ 
 could swear; hut the rest were absconded. Hearing 
 the justices were in the hail, we went thither with- 
 out delay: and telling the clerk, we had business 
 with the court, we were speedily introduced. The
 
 fSU EXI'EiUKAT'K OS 
 
 .liairnimi. after \\u had made our complain!, rough- 
 h said, •'¥(>!) are Hie aggre^sorj and now you Jiavc 
 lie impudence to come to us, requiring justice 
 ..gainst others*" I answered, "I am here. If I have 
 broke any Saw, inflict the ffenaity upon me. But in 
 he mean time, i require you, inhfs Majesty's name, 
 to do justice upon ijse^c rioters." After more 
 threats.) was desired local! upon one of them, at his 
 own house, tthen the court was over. I did s«>, and 
 he behaved exceeding well, sending his servant for 
 ' .wo of the rioters; one of whom brought his master 
 to speak for him; hut the justice told him plainly, 
 "Either make it up with Mr Mather, or I will send 
 vou to jail directly.*' They hot h then asked par- 
 Son, promised good behaviour for the future, paid 
 he expenses, and were dismissed. The third fled, 
 but a warrant being given, lie was apprehended; hut 
 upon the same terms he was released. 
 
 I cannot hut remark another thing which happen- 
 ed (Siis year. Nottingham hail at this time no regu- 
 lar preaching- I had a strong desire to make a trial 
 there, and cyme (hither in the afternoon. At Mat- 
 thew Bagshaw's, 1 found John Johnson, of York, 
 ■who said, J am glad you are come, lor here is a poor 
 snau, who is to die to-morrow, whose behaviour is 
 terrifying: he curves, swears, and threatens death to 
 all who June given evidence against him; the jailor 
 in particular. He will see no clergyman, but says, 
 he resolves to he a devil, that he may revenge him- 
 self. The. minister hasghen me free leave to visit 
 him. ] went this morning; but he said, "Give 
 j ourseSf no trouble about me. Bv this time io mor- 
 row, 1 shall he a devil, and then I will come and tear 
 liiat villain in pieces." TVe immediately we^t to 
 prayer and vehemently wrestled with God on his 
 behalf. Alter prayers* we went Jo him, and at first 
 !il observed an entire change in his behaviour.— 
 ' r enquired when this sudden change began? And 
 !\>u«,d ii was just while we were at prayer. Hut w r e. 
 had little opportunity of speaking to him. the mini?-
 
 MR. ALEXANDER M.VTHliU. 
 
 ter (for whom he had sent) feeing just *»me, I on! i 
 only sav, as lie passed by mc heavy ironed, "Jewis 
 Christ 'is hoth able and willing to strike off (ho 
 "heavier fetters of sin from your soul." He looked 
 earnestly, hut said nothing. We applied again to 
 the throne of Grace, before and after preaching: 
 and likewise great part of the night. We went cur- 
 ly in the morning, and he was brought to us in the 
 parlour. We talked and prayed with him some time. 
 After rising from prayer, he said to the jailor. "I 
 now forgive and love you; and I hope and pray, (hat 
 von wili forgive me."" This was quickly noised a- 
 hout the town, which filled the yard with specta- 
 tors* who erouded about the windows, which ga\e 
 us an opportunity of speaking to them. also. Sic a* to 
 aeknowedged the justice of his 'sentence, and was re- 
 signed to ii, having a strong hope of finding mercy. 
 We attended him into the yard, when his irons were 
 knocked off, amidst a vast crowd, to whom he spa^o 
 much on the occasion. Thence we accom.pu.rtk -d I 
 to the church, and afterwards to the QHrtj which 
 stood at the gate, ready to receive hi.m. fy,< : ( as he 
 desired to walk between us, the 'rihe-ritf £rttfe him 
 leave, and took much pains to keep oil' tl-^ crowd: 
 at the end of thctown, we sa-jg part of thai Hftiiri, 
 
 "C fcr a thousand torques to sing, 
 
 "\ty Great Redeemer's, praise," 
 During .the three first verses he seemed liiu-.d up: 
 liut when we came to Lhuse worths in the fourth \ei»e a 
 
 "His Blood can. make the foule6t < 
 
 "His Blaodayail'd for me!" 
 
 kerejoiced with joy unspeakable. When vfe came 
 .to the idaee of execution, the minister praye 1 m\ ! 
 vvent away. The sheriff allowed us to pVay \\ i 
 him again. And we committell his soul (a" I 
 in cheerful hope of meeting him again in 1-ibciiiia 
 bosom. 
 
 In the vear 1738, being stationed nj SfeVciistJe 
 
 B
 
 3? JE.XPEH1EN0K Or 
 
 I took my room. I was not able to come down 
 stairs for a month. My wife was quite a stranger 
 at Newcastle: but I could leave her and all things 
 to God. I spoke freely to all who came to see me, 
 not lei ting any escape out ot my hands. Mr. Blair> 
 the minister, came frequently: and his son, a phy- 
 sician, visited me several times a day. It was now I 
 discharged the clotted blood, which had lain in me 
 ever since the riot at Boston. Yet I did not recov- 
 er, till I prevailed upon my mother to give me a large 
 quantity of toast and water. The disorder was then 
 presently stopped, and in a day or two I went down 
 stairs. 
 
 The sabbath following the Sacrament was to be 
 administered. I sent a line to Mr. Blair, and desired, 
 to be admitted to it, if it would not offend any of his 
 parishioners. He immediately sent me a token, 
 saying « k I will admit you if they are all offended.'* 
 I went on sabbath, tie first day I was abroad. 
 The service lasted from nine in the morning, to five 
 an the evening; but I received no hurt. The next 
 morning I breakfasted at Mr. Blair's, with the min- 
 ister that assisted at the sacrament: They were 
 sensible, candid men. Mr. Blair desired me to give 
 iheui an account of the works of God in England. 
 But when I mentioned the greatness of the work, 
 and the fewness o the labourers, he said, "among 
 so great a number of people, there must be many 
 men of learning: why does not Mr. W. send them 
 out?" This led me -to mention the prerequisites of a 
 Methodist -preacher: namely, 1 A knowledge of God 
 as his God, as having pardoned all his sins. 2. A life 
 and convention suitable thereto. 3. A clear convic- 
 tion that he was called of God to the work; other 
 wise he could not bear the crosses attending it. 4. 
 Some fruit of his labour, in convincing and convert- 
 ing of sinners. Mr. Blair broke out "If these are 
 the prerequisites of a Methodist preacher, they must 
 not c ■••uie here for them." 1 preached twice before 1 
 left Brechin, to a vast concourse of people; and af-
 
 MH. ALEXANDfctt MATHEH. 13S 
 
 lerward at Montrose: but I kn >w not that it had any 
 lasting effect, unless the removing of prejudice. 
 
 In 1759 I was stationed in York circuit, which 
 then included Yarm. Scarborough, and Hull circuits. 
 In this year the work at Whitby began, aid tre had 
 a great out-pouring of the spirit in many places. 
 The next year 1 was in SutFordsiiir .*, where it ul eas- 
 ed God to work in a very eminent manner: at .)ar- 
 leston in particular, where there was a small, hut 
 steady society of long standi ig. Several of these 
 had borne much persecution, and took jo> fully the 
 spoiling of their goods. Ever since, their behavior 
 has been unblameable: and yet n one of them could 
 sa , -'I know that my Redeemer iivelh." Sow of 
 these coming over to the prayer meetings at W'ed- 
 nesbury, and hearing (what they thought they had 
 never heard before) that thev were to believe now: 
 that they might come to Christ now. without any 
 other qualification, than a sense of their own sinful- 
 ness and helplessness, were uUerij astonished; and 
 they began to be amazed at their slowness of heart. 
 Presently a praver meeting was set up at Darias- 
 ton. And in a little lime many soitl-s were *ei at 
 lil»erty. The oldest stood out longest, liter all 
 they haU done and suffered, they found it hard to 
 come, as having done nothing. A. id when they were 
 urged to it in a class or prayer-meeting tney were 
 ready to gnash their teeth. But whether they would 
 hear or forbear, God continued to add more and 
 more souls to his genuine Gospel. Nothing stood 
 before it— manv of the servants and children of these 
 old professors cried out "W mt must 1 do to be »av- 
 eU?" being pointed to the Lamb of God, they believ- 
 ed and rejoiced in God their Saviour, to the utter 
 astonishment of their unbelieving masters and pa- 
 rents. In one night it was common to see li>e or 
 six (and sometimes more) praising God for his par- 
 Joning mercy. And not a few in Birmingham, Dud- 
 ley, and Wolverhampton, as well as in Weduesimry 
 and Darlaston, clearly testified, that the blood of 
 Jesus Christ had cleansed them from all sin.
 
 140 Experience or 
 
 Meantime the societies increased greatly, In Dm*- 
 laston we purchased ground and built a preaching* 
 house, and in Birmingham we hired a large building. 
 Satan was alarmed at this, and stirred up outward 
 persecution, both at Birmingham and Wolverhamp- 
 ton. But it did us no hurt. Our brethren went on* 
 not counting their lives dear unto themselves. He 
 then made the minds of some of the old Methodists 
 evil affected towards their hretheren. They began to 
 speak much evil (particularly in their classes) of 
 them and of this new doctrine. And any defects in 
 these new converts (as they called them) were mag- 
 nificdj to the utmost: and then brought as an unde- 
 niable proof, that the whole matter was wrong. 
 These were earnestly supported by Mr. J. — *-* — s, 
 formerly an Itinerant, now a local preacher. To 
 htm they sent every tale that malice eould invent, 
 either against the work, or the instruments employ- 
 ed (herein, my wife in particular; whom indeed Go'l 
 had been pleased to make eminently useful. This 
 embarrassed me a little: however, we went on, and 
 the work did tint suffer much, til about the time of 
 the conference, when some of 4he preachers, going 
 through the circuit, and hearing only one side 
 (though they might have heard both, as I was pre- 
 sent) both privately encouraged the opposition; and 
 in their public discourses* dividing the people into 
 the new and old believers, used many unkind expres- 
 sions, to encourage the old, and discourage the mew 
 believers, as they called them. This went iiard with 
 one that was not an old preacher, and being bui the 
 fourth year of my preaching, and theiirst of my act- 
 ing as an assistant. However, by the grace of God, 
 far less hurt was tl one than might .reasonably have 
 been expected. 
 
 As 1 wrote to you the most minute circumstances 
 of the work, and you were there in the very height 
 of it, you judged it best to place me in tire circuit 
 auother year. But I made a false step in the begin - 
 ing of it. Longing for peaee, and preferring the 
 judgment of other men to my own. I agreed that my
 
 KH .. . :i. MA') 
 
 
 c should not hold any snore prayer-mee lings. — ► 
 Immediately the work began to decay, boll; as to its 
 swiftness anil 'Xtensivene«s» Antl though I continu- 
 ed to insist as strouglj' as ever upon the same points, 
 vei there was not the Same effect tor want of second- 
 ing by prayer meetings, the blow which was given 
 ii» pi-each i.;g. Mr. Wssiell laboured with me this 
 year. We constantly attended Stroud and Pains t 
 wiiik: at both piaees there was a large increase; as 
 also in several other parts of the circuit, which then 
 included Conventry and Shewsbury. 
 
 After haying been married near (en years, I had 
 tli is year a son. May he prove a blessing to many, 
 and a e» m fort to his parents! In May and June, you 
 desired mc to vi-il Wales and regulate the societies 
 there. They were ail tiiea supplied by Mr. Taylor, 
 who was exceeding useful among them. But the 
 people in general were difficult to get, and more so 
 to keep, in society, in many places, however, they 
 joined together, and not a few of them remain to 
 this day. 
 
 In 1763, God revived his work in the Stafford- 
 shire circuit: especially at ]>irniinghau; notwith- 
 standing the disturbance winch we had during he 
 preaching, ami tiie (Sanger of being murdercti by tiie 
 moo, when we came out of the house. i\o magis- 
 trate could quell the rioters: :>r rather I should 
 say. none would. Kor it is .-ertaiu, any magistrate 
 has power to preserve the peace if he will, lint 
 at leiigfis Mi: Wordy Birch took them in hand: he 
 iai I some of the rioters in the dungeon, and left 
 them there a n.ght or t v t cook He lined the rest 
 according to law: obliged them to pay the money 
 down, and ga\e ii to the poor. Uy this means their 
 stout spirits were humbled, and we have had peace 
 -ever since. This year a preaching house was built 
 at Stroud; and another at Wolverhampton. But 
 this was not long lived: for soo^ after the mob as- 
 sembled, and pulled it down to the ground. 
 
 They had reigned here for a long time, insomuch. 
 that it was difficult for a Methodist to pass the
 
 142 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 streets. And now* one Could hardly appear in thei;; 
 but at the hazard <>f his life. The rioters had broke 
 most of their windows, and swore they would pull 
 down their houses, and every preaching house near 
 Hearing of this a* Stroud. I rode over immediate- 
 ly and found the whole country in terror, as they ex- 
 pected every night the mob from Wolverhampton, 
 to pull down the preaching houses at Dud'ey. Oar- 
 laston, and Wedneshury, with the bouses of the Me- 
 thodists. They first came to Darlaston, a place 
 long famous for rioting, hoping to meet with good 
 encouragement. But a hog butcher, wno lived near 
 the house bearing the alarm, leaped out of bed, seiz- 
 ed his cleaver, and running out, swore death to the 
 first that meddled with it. So unexpected a recep- 
 tion quite discouraged them, and made them vim 
 away faster than they came. Here we saw the 
 goo?! effect which the late revival had upon the town 
 in general. Tlifre were few left, who would either 
 persecute themselves, or suffer others to do it. 
 
 But Wolverhampton itself was still in a flame. A 
 friend who was to accompany me to the town, and 
 procured a pair of pocket pistols and offered me one. 
 But I told him, "No: I am in God's work, and trust 
 to his protection. And you must return your pis- 
 tols, or I cannot accept of your company." He did 
 so. When I came to the end of the town, the alarm 
 was quickly spread. So that before we came into 
 the main street, we had company enough. But 
 they were restrained, so that we received little 
 abuse, further than bad language. 1 immediately 
 went to the justice, who granted a warrant: but the 
 constable gave notice of it to the rioters, so that none 
 was taken: some fled, some hid themselves: the rest 
 set the justice at defiance. This occassioned several 
 neighboring justices to fix a day for meeting in the 
 town. When they met, several of the rioters were 
 brought before thorn. Three were boua.l over to 
 appeal* at Stafford, where all the magistrates gave 
 attendance. The proof against the rioters was Euil: 
 vet the honourable jury acquitted liiem a'J!
 
 MH. ALEXANilEH MATHER. 143 
 
 This sjave them fresh spirits: so they hasted home 
 with rdibous fl\ iug, and were saluted with bells mid 
 bonfires* in one of which the^ burnt me and my 
 friend in effigy. l)ur friends now found H more 
 dangerous than ever to tome into the town, or gel 
 to their nouses. Before I left Stafford, I waited on 
 
 "Lord D -witli Mr. Hayes, Attorney, the person 
 
 who prepared the mob, and himself made the first 
 breach in the house. I told him plainly, either let 
 Mr. Hayes rebuild the house or we will Cry him I'm 
 his life. He promised it should be rebuilt in such 
 a time: and it was built accordingly. So did God 
 deliver us out of this complicated trouble. And all 
 the time his work, prospered. 
 
 But what could not be done by persecution, hav 
 been done by those who brought in a new doctrine 
 amoung us. This soon checked, and has now well 
 nigh destroyed, both the root and branch of vifal 
 religion, They who receive this new light, not 
 only despise and speak evil of those that begat them 
 to God. but even deny the reality of thatf unspeaka- 
 ble blessing, which the} then received. They say, 
 "We were then blind, and knew nothing."' — Happy 
 ignorance! which enabled them to endure reproach, 
 pain, want: vea, to carry their lives in their hands, 
 counting nothing dear, but to have a concieuce void 
 of offence, towards God and towards man. 
 
 In August 1770, 1 was stationed in Bristol cir- 
 cuit. Here I met with various exercises, But J 
 was more than conquerer, and good was done in 
 Bristol, and in several other place*. Particularly at 
 Bath, where they were obliged first to enlarge, and 
 then to gallery the preaching house. In the spring 
 1 was called to Monmouth, to open a preaching 
 house, which was duly licensed. We preached with 
 tolerable quietness till Sabbath evening. The church 
 wardens then came before me, went in, and shut the 
 doors. Meantime the street was all in an uproar 
 1 went on with Mrs. Hern and Miss Fortune (mv 
 only companions^ til! we met the mob, who ooened
 
 144 »xv ' < _ : s'cfe o .' 
 
 to the right ami left, and let us pass to the floor, ft 
 Mas shut, but hi a while 1 prevailed to have it open- 
 ed. And one of them asked, what authority 1 had 
 to preach? I asked, who he was? lie said, the church- 
 warden. "Then you have no authority to question* 
 me. I shall not shew mine, hut to a proper person, 
 Aid I desire you will either behave well, or with- 
 draw." Another said, ♦•Sir, will yoii shew it me? 
 I am the the chief constable. " 1 answered. ^Sir, I 
 will." While he was reading, the churrh-wav'U'a 
 looked over him, and said, '•<) Sir, this will not 
 do." J said, Sir, it will do for me: and I require! 
 all of you who stay, to behave in a becoming mun- 
 ner. The chief constable then withdrew: bat the 
 croud Was so great, that they could not half v ! - :t in. 
 And those without were so .'noisy* that wftlvirig" eo 
 be heard. So after a time 1 judged it best to with- 
 draw. 
 
 In the evening the mayor sent, desiring me to at 
 tend him in the morning; at the town hail. I went. 
 Soon after came the mayor, the eierk of the peace. 
 and al! the chief men of the town. The rector and 
 curate used some harsh words. The other getv- 
 tiemen behaved' civillv. But they asked so rfiahT 
 questions, and spoke so many at a time, it was im- 
 possible to answer. I said, "gentlemen, be pleased 
 to speak one at a time. But this could not be done. 
 Only they all agreed in desiring me to promise, that 
 I would come no more. I told them, "I would 
 make no such promise; no, not if my Hfe depended 
 upon it." So we parted as we met, aud the next day 
 I got safe to Bristol. 
 
 in 1773, I was stationed at Canterbury. During 
 my tay in this circuit, we had a fair prospect of do- 
 ing good at Gravesend. The congregations were 
 large, aud not a few appeared to be much -affected. 
 The society increased, and all things were in a flour- 
 ishing condition, till a poor creature, one George 
 Goal;!, appeared, who at first came as One of bur 
 • cud*. But 'io soon -V had he gamed thoaffeel-ioij**.
 
 MM, ALEXANDER MATHEK. 14» 
 
 of the people, than he pulled off the mask, and 
 preached Calvinism. And hereby such a wound 
 was given to the society, as is not healed to this day. 
 
 In the year 1777, I was appointed for the Coin 
 circuit. It was not long before, that the gallery in 
 the preaching house, being full of people, had fallen 
 flat to the ground. And though no one was killed, 
 yet some limbs were broken, and many poor people 
 bruised. This obliged me to travel through many 
 societies, in order to defray those large expences,of 
 taking care of those that were hurt, and rebuilding 
 the gallery, as well as buildiig and furnishing a 
 house For the preacher. But whatever fatigue I 
 had, was abundantly made up by the kindness and 
 liberality of our brethren. 
 
 Having prepared the materials for the preaching- 
 house at Paddiham the next year, on the first of Oc- 
 tober we laid the foundation. But a person pre- 
 tending a claim to the ground, when the wall was a- 
 bout a yard high, threw a part of it down. We bore 
 this >u rage, and proceeded in the work. This em- 
 boldened him to engage three mason*, who came in 
 the night, when the roof was on, wrested out the 
 sides o» both doors with the lintels, with a yard of 
 the wall above. They broke the sides of the two 
 large windows, near three feet on each side; they 
 then made a large hole in the pillar between the two 
 windows, intending to throw down the house. But 
 suddenly such a panic seized them, that first one aid 
 then the other stout short and ran away. These re- 
 turned no more. But their employer, with the third 
 man, resolved to finish their work. Presently he was 
 himself struck with a fear of being killed, and ran 
 away, dragging his fellow with him. 
 
 Being averse to law, we bore this also: but we set 
 a watc : on the house every night, till it was cover- 
 ed in and licened, in hopes we sho-ild then be quiet. 
 But on December the 2ist, he. brmg'it two men at 
 eieven in the forenoon, with a pickax and a crow, 
 and directed them.to begin at one of Uie doors, which 
 13
 
 146 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 was not quite repaired. The workmen stood amaz- 
 ed, but several of the townsmen quickly came to 
 the place, two of them were remarkably weak men, 
 and one of them lame besides. One laid hold of the 
 pickax, and one of the crow. They that held them 
 were stout men, the terror of the country. Many 
 took part on each side. I was in my room, and at 
 first thought to not stir out. But fearing mischief 
 .might be done, I sent for a constable, and walked 
 myself to the chapel. The young man was strug- 
 ling with him that held the pickax, to whom I spoke, 
 and he promised to be quiet. Meantime some took 
 the crow from the other man, which their employer 
 observed, struck a lad that helped them. He re- 
 turned the blow. A battle ensued, wherein the gen- 
 leman was worsted, and rolled into the dirt. 
 
 Finding there was no other way, 1 procured a war- 
 rant from serjeant Aspinwall, for the chief rioters. 
 This was served immediately. The next morning 
 we waited upon him, at his house, and he bound 
 them all over to the assizes. But I recollecting that 
 Mr. W — n had said before the serjeant, he was wil- 
 ling to refer the whole affair to him, I sent him 
 word, "I was willing too;" and desired him to 
 name the time and place. But he would do 
 neither. After preaching at Millend in the even- 
 ing, I went to bed; but my sleep departed from me. 
 However, I rose as usual; but before 1 went out of 
 my room, I heard a knocking at the door. It was 
 one from Paddiham, who mournfully cried out, "O 
 Sir, we are all ruined! Mr. W — n has got a warrant 
 for seven and twenty of us, and you are the lirst in 
 it — We must all be at the Serjeant's by noon." I 
 told him, "I would be there." As soon as 1 came 
 I saw Mr. W — n just going into the yard. I follow- 
 ed him close, to the great joy of my friends. We 
 were near forty in number. The sergeant commg 
 to the door, I asked, ♦'Why* I was summoned?" He 
 answered, "For a riot." I answered, "Sir, you can- 
 not but know that Mr. W T . has done this out of mere
 
 MR. ALEXANDER MATHER. 147" 
 
 litigiousness. But why should we trouble the whole 
 •ountry with our affairs? cannot we settle it between 
 ourselves?" To this Mr. W. agreed. So as we had 
 no bonds of arbitration ready, we both signed a 
 memorandum to the same effect. The poor people 
 then went home in peace. After some difficulties, 
 the bonds were signed, and after hearing all parties, 
 the Serjeant's sentence was, 1. That the ground 
 (part ef which we had purchased) should be equal- 
 ly divided between us and Mr. W. and 2. That he 
 should pay us five pounds for the damage he had 
 done. Thus we were at length delivered out of our 
 trouble, and peace re-established at Paddiham. 
 
 What I may meet with hereafter, I know not: I 
 can only say, I find it in my heart to spend and be 
 spent for God, in promoting his glory and the sal- 
 vation of man. To that end I am determined still 
 to preach the whole Methodist doctrine, and see that 
 the dicipline to which God has led us, be executed 
 in all its branches. I see more and more, that 
 where it is uot executed, little lasting good is done. 
 I know this is not the way of ease, nor the way to 
 popularity. But as I set out, without a view to ei- 
 ther, so 1 hope to continue by the grace of God. 
 I remain your affectionate, 
 
 And dutiful son in the gospel, 
 
 ALEXANDER MATHER. 
 
 After reading and considering the foregoing ac- 
 count, I observed to Mr. Mather, that he had whol- 
 ly omitted one considerable branch of his experi- 
 ence, touching what is properly termed the great 
 salvation. He wrote me a full and particular an- 
 swer, the substance of which I have subjoined. 
 
 JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 "I answer, 1. With regard to the time and place, 
 it was at Rotherliam, in fhe year 1757, that I enjoy- 
 ed it in a far larger degree, than 1 ever did before, 
 or do now. Although my situation the next year
 
 1-4*5 EXfERIENOE OF 
 
 laid many hindrances in the way, yet 1 both preach- 
 ed it plainly, and strongly encouraged those that 
 had before experienced it, and such as professed to 
 receive it at that time, either at Sunderland or else- 
 where. This 1 continued to do in 59 and 60;in which 
 lime many were made partakers of it, in York, at 
 and near Pocklington, in Hull, and various other pla- 
 ces. It was the enjoyment of this, which supported 
 me in the trials 1 met with at Wedneshury, in the 
 two following years. During which, many were ad- 
 ded to the witnesses of it in Birmingham, Dudley, 
 Darlaston, Wolverhampton and Wedneshury. It was 
 my own experience which emboldened me to assert 
 it, even where it was opposed by our chief members, 
 partly because of the faults of some that professed 
 it; but chiefly because of the natural enmity of 
 their hearts to God. 
 
 What I had experienced in my own soul, was an 
 instantaneous deliverance from ^11 those wrong tem- 
 pers and affections, which I had long and sensibly 
 groaned under. An entire disengagement from eve- 
 ry creature, with an entire devotedness to God; and 
 from that moment, I found an unspeakable pleasure 
 in doing the will of God in all things. I had also a 
 power to do it, and the constant approbation both of 
 my own conscience and of God. I had simplicity 
 of heart, and a single eye to God, at all times ami in 
 all places; with such a fervent zeal for tbe glory of 
 God, and the good of souls as swallowed up every 
 other care and consideration. Above all, 1 had un- 
 interrupted communion with God, whether sleeping 
 or waking. Oh! that it were with me, a.-, when the 
 candle of the Lord shone upon my head! While I 
 fall it to my mind, my soul begins to wing its way 
 toward that immediate enjoyment of God. May it 
 never be retarded, but press into the glorious liberty 
 which is equally free for all the sons of God. 
 "As to the manner in which this work was wrought, 
 1. After I was clearly justified, 1 was soon made sen- 
 sible of my want of it. For although 1 was enable
 
 MR. ALEXANDER MATHER. 149 
 
 to be very circumspect, and had a continual power 
 over outward and inward sin, yet 1 felt in me what 1 
 knew was .'contrary to the mind which was in Christ, 
 and what hindered me from enjoying and glorifying 
 him, asl saw it was (he privilege of a ehild of Gqu 
 to do. And such 1 knew myself to be, both from 
 the fruit and the witness of Lis spirit; which I felt 
 in a strong degree, supporting me in eonllicts of a 
 very close and particular nature. 2. My conviction 
 of the need of a farther change, was abundantly in- 
 creased by the searching preaching of Mr. Walsh, 
 of blessed memory. This kept my conscience very 
 tender.even to a degree of scrupulosity; and helped 
 me to be much in private prayer,andkept me watch- 
 ing thereunto. 3. When 1 saw my call to preach, the 
 difficulties attending that ofrice, shewed me more 
 and more the need of such a change, that 1 might 
 hear all thing-; and by searching the scriptures, I 
 saw the possibility of it more elearl/, and was stir- 
 red up to seek it more earnestly. 4. When I began 
 traveling,! had no end,aim, or design but to spend and 
 be spent tor God : not counting my life, or any thing 
 dear, so I might finish my course with joy : which 
 indeed 1 expected would be very short, as •• 1 dealc 
 'my life at every blow." I saw as clearly as ! do 
 now, that nothing furthers that end so much as a 
 heart and life wholly devoted to God. 
 
 " This made me neglect the advantage I had in 
 my youth of a tolerable acquaintance with latin, 
 which I could easily have recovered : (£J° hut this 
 and every other gain i counted but loss, that I might 
 win that intimacy witli God, which 1 still think to 
 be the life of preaching. Therefore 1 husbanded all 
 the time that 1 could save Irom company, eating or 
 sleeping, to lay out in wrestling with God, for my- 
 self and the hVck : so I devoted to God some part of 
 every leisure hour; oteraiul above the hour from 
 eleven to twelve in the foreuooa, and from four to 
 five in the afternoon. Herein i was sweetly drawn 
 13 *
 
 150 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 after God, and had many and large views of (hat sal- 
 vation which 1 war-ted, and which he had provided 
 in his Son. The exceeding great and precious pro- 
 mises were clearly opened tome. And having a full 
 assurance of the power and faithfulness of the pro- 
 mises, my soul often tasted of their sweetness. And 
 though unbelief prevented my immediate possession, 
 yet I had a blessed foretaste of them. This made 
 me desire the full enjoyment more and more. 1 ab- 
 horred whatever seemed to keep me from it. I 
 sought out every obstruction. I was willing to offer 
 up every Isaac, and inflamed with great ardour in 
 wrestling with God. Determined not to let him go,till 
 he emptied me of all sin, and tilled me with himself. 
 
 "This I believe he did, when I ventured upon 
 Jesus as sufficient to sa\e to the uttermost, lie 
 wrought in me what I cannot express, what 1 judge 
 it is impossible to utter. Yet 1 was not long with- 
 out reasoning : not concerning the work ; of this I 
 was absolutely sure : but whether such and such 
 things as I soon discovered in myself were consistent 
 with it. And this had its use, as it qualified me to 
 advise others, who, though saved from sin, were 
 tried in the same way. 
 
 ♦'Upon this head, 1 consulted Mr. Walsh, and his 
 advice helped me in some degree. But God helped 
 me much more in private prater; herein I was clear- 
 ly satisfied — 1. That deliverance from sin does not 
 imply deliverance from human infirmities, ti. That 
 neither is it inconsistent with feeling our natural 
 appetites, or with the regular gratification of them: 
 and 3. That salvation from sin is not inconsistent 
 with temptations of various kinds. And all this you 
 have clearly and fully declared in the ''Plain aoeouit 
 oi Christian perfection.'* 
 
 "1 have only to observe, that while my soul was 
 following hard after God, I had Frequent temptations 
 to resume my Latin, and learn the other languages: 
 especially when 1 observed some of my brethren who
 
 MR. ALEXANDER MATHER. 151 
 
 had made some progress therein, though they had 
 not the same advantages with me. Bui the comfort 
 I found in spending a!l my time as above, and the 
 thought, that however this might recommend them 
 to some hearers, yet they were not hereby more in- 
 strumental than before, either in awakening, eon- 
 verting, or building up souls, made me quite easy 
 abjut it. This I have considered as the only busU 
 ness, and peculiar glory of a Methodist preacher. — 
 Not that I think our brethren who have made this 
 progress, have not been useful in all these respects; 
 but I think they are not more useful than they were 
 when they were strangers to these things. And I 
 doubt whether they are so useful as the^ might have 
 been, had they employed the same time, the same 
 diligence, and the same intenseness of thought, in 
 the several branches of that work, for which they 
 willingly gave up all. For my own part, I want to 
 feel the same principle ever actuating me, which I 
 felt the moment I set out. 
 
 "Upon the whole, I find abundant cause to praise 
 God for the support he has given me under various 
 trials, and the vvonderfui deliverance from them. I 
 praise him for so preserving me from impatience in 
 them, that the enemy had no room to speak reproach- 
 fully. In all, he has given me free access to the 
 throne of grace; often with a strong confidence of 
 deliverance. I bless God, that the trials 1 have met 
 with, even from my brethren, have never given me 
 an inelination to decline the work; nor for any time 
 together, to be less active in any branch of it. I 
 always considered, 1 bad nothing which I had not 
 received, and tiiat the design of the giver was, that 
 ail should be used with singleness of heart, to please 
 God, ami not man. 1 praise him, that though some 
 of the affairs 1 have been engaged in, being quite 
 new to uie, -»o deeply employed my thought, as some- 
 ti.iies to divert me from that degree of communion 
 with God, in which is my only happiness, and with- 
 out which my soul can never be at rest; jet he gives
 
 152 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 me always fo sec, that the fulness of the promise is 
 every Christian's privilege, am! that this ami every 
 branch of salvation is to he received now, by faith 
 alone. An<! it can only be retained by the same 
 means, by believing every momeoti We cannot rest 
 on any thing that has been done, or that may be done 
 hereafter. Fitis would keen us from living a life uf 
 faith, which I conceive to be no other, than the now 
 deriving virtue from Jesus, by which we enjoy and 
 live to God. My soul is often on si retch for the full 
 enjoyment of I) is, without interruption; nor can I 
 discharge my conscience, without urging it upon all 
 believers, now to come unto him, %vlw is able to save 
 unto the uttermost!" 
 
 fHE EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 k BliK^ 11©S1 
 
 TO THE REV. MR. JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 April 20, 1779. 
 Reverend Sir, 
 
 I WAS born at Kexborough, a little town in the 
 West-Riding of Yorkshire, in the yeaY 174-3. My 
 father, who taught a school in the town, had the ex- 
 ternal parts of religion before he heard the Method- 
 ists: he used family and private prayer, read the 
 scriptures, and other books of devotion in hi> fami- 
 ly daily, and frequently instructed, exhorted, and 
 catechised his children. Jiy tiiis discipline we were 
 restrained' from many evils, taught the fear of the 
 Lord, and, in some measure, to seek that which is 
 arood.
 
 MR. BENJAMIN RHODES. 155 
 
 Before I Mas eleven years of age, I went with my 
 father to Birstal, to hear Mr. Whiteiield. I found 
 my soul deeply affected under the word. At first I 
 had a kind of terror; hut hefore the sermon was end- 
 ed, my heart was melted into tenderness, and sweet- 
 ly drawn after God: yet a few months after this, a 
 propensity to foolish pleasures sprang up in my 
 breast, and drew me into childish vanities. 
 
 About twelve years of age, I took a walk one even- 
 ing into a large thick wood, not far from the town. 
 I left the path, and wandered in the thickest part of 
 it, till 1 was entirely lost. Night be^an to close in 
 upon me, and I did not know which way to turn my 
 face towards home. It soon became quite dark: I 
 then gave over rambling, and intended to have re- 
 mained there till the morning, when I hoped to find 
 my way out. In this situation I found my former 
 impressions begin to return with much sweetness. 
 My soul was drawn out in prayer; I was deeply sen- 
 sible of the presence of God; my heart overflowed 
 with penitential tenderness; and under a deep sense 
 of my own unwm thiness, and of his goodness, mer- 
 cy, and love, I sung and prayed with much fervour; 
 yea, I was so thankful that the Lord had found me, 
 while lost in a wood, that I would not, for all the 
 world, have missed such an opportunity. 
 
 My parents being alarmed at my not returning at 
 the usual time, made great search for ine. At last 
 my father came to the wood side and called aloud; 
 I soon heard him, and following the sound, got out 
 about midnight, without receiving any hurt. 
 
 The impressions 1 received this night lasted for 
 some time: but youthful pleasure again prevailed, 
 and drew me into such follies, as grieved the Spirit 
 of God, and greatly damped the fervour of my own 
 spirits. 
 
 1 was chiefly at home with my father till I was 
 sixteen years of age, and mostly attended the school. 
 I had great opportunities of improvement, both in 
 learning and religion; but my volatile spirit did not
 
 154 EXPEBUEN6E OF- 
 
 love study and confinement: the love of pleasure pre- 
 vailed over my judgment, and though my vain en- 
 jo^ ments were rendered very painful, from my fa- 
 ther's displeasure, and the terrors of my eonseienee, 
 yet my attachments to them made me careless about 
 things profitable, -and prevented such an improve- 
 ment as might have been made. 
 
 About this time, my father put me out to learn 
 some branches in the wool and worsted business. — 
 His chief motive in placing me where he did, was, 
 that I might be under the means of grace: and 
 though I attended the preaching constantly, heartily 
 believed the doctrine, and often felt the power of the 
 Word; yet 1 Avas so much taken up with pleasure, 
 and those companions, who led me from seriousness 
 and religion, that at last, as with a flood, I was car- 
 ried away; not indeed into gross sins, (for I do not 
 remember that 1 ever swore an oath, or took God's 
 name into my mouth upon a light occasion) but into 
 foolish company, gaiety, and youthful vanities. But 
 in my foolish career, I was like the troubled sea: the 
 more I sought to please myself in vanity, the further 
 I was from it: and sometimes my conscience terri- 
 fied me almost to distraction, so that I have been 
 afraid to sleep, lest I should awake in endless mise- 
 ry. All tliis time my understanding was clearly in- 
 formed respecting the nature and the necessity of 
 religion, and I felt great reverence for it. None can 
 tell the struggles 1 had in my breast, between my 
 conscience and my inclinations: sometimes one, aud 
 sometimes the other, was obeyed. I knew I could 
 not be truly religious without parting with all that 
 is contrary to seriousness, and without having the 
 bent of my mind turned from vanity to God. Neir 
 therdid I make any pretentions to it, as I had not a 
 fixed determination to forsake all and follow Christ. 
 
 When 1 was about nineteen, 1 thought myself most 
 miserable. I was quite sick of vanity, and so har- 
 dened with a sense of it on my conscience, that I 
 could not Hud rest day nor night. I then began to
 
 MR. BENJAMIN RHOBES. 155 
 
 think on the mercy and goodness of God, winch had 
 been so abundantly made manifest to me in times 
 past, but my follies so reproached me, that I was 
 ashamed to look up. 1 then found a willingness to 
 be saved in God's way, and groaning in my bondage, 
 prayed, •« Turn thou me, Lord, and I shall be turn- 
 ed." The Lord heard, and turned the whole desire 
 of my heart froui every thing earthly, unto himself, 
 it was then I found such relenting* of soul, as I had 
 not done before. Nothing affected me more than a 
 • sense of God's long suffering, mercy, and goodness: 
 that after I had so often refused his calls, quenched 
 his spirit, and abused his blessings, yet I no soouer 
 cried to him, than he heard, and delivered me from 
 the servitude of sin, and encouraged me to hope in 
 his mercy. My whole heart was then given up to 
 him. Prayer was now my chief business, aud 1 of- 
 ten sung, very feelingly, 
 
 "Wealth and honour I disdain, 
 "Earthly comforts all are vain; 
 "These can never satisfy; 
 "Give me Christ, or else I die." 
 
 In this state I continued several months, desiring 
 and seeking God alone, without much interruption 
 or temptation. About this time I was invited to a 
 private meeting among the Calvinists. The minis- 
 ter spoke much of the power of imagination, and 
 what a deluded people the Methodists were, and 
 warned his flock not to come near them. I was 
 greatly bewildered and terrified at this. I began to 
 suspect that my call to religion, and the change in 
 my mind, were only delusions. I was also tempted 
 lo think., that all who professed religion, were like 
 myself. 1 was carried so far as to doubt of Chris- 
 tianity, and of the being of a God! 1 thought the 
 greatest part of the world consisted of Heathens, 
 Mahometans, and Jews; the Popish religion is al- 
 most as idolatrous as the Pagan; theVe are hut Tew 
 Protestant Christians, and hut very lew of these who 
 act consistent with the doetrinos of Christianity. —
 
 156 EXPERIENCE Or 
 
 These thoughts increased my infidelity, till T was al- 
 most distracted. Darkness and horror sat brooding 
 upon my mind, together with a gloomy 'ear of fall- 
 ing into nothing, or worse than nothing, at death.— 
 I hated life, and though templed, yet afraid to ven- 
 ture on death. I had no power to pray; I only wish- 
 ed for a dark retreat, where I might converse with 
 darkness and miser j alone. 
 
 In this "horrible pit" I groaned for deliverance, 
 yet was not sensible of •<; deliverer near. At last I 
 found power to look up, my heart hegan to melt, 
 and the spirit of prayer returned: 1 eried, and the 
 Lord heard. The darkness began to disperse: hope 
 again visited my soul,* yea, it increased, attended 
 with a degree of confidence in God, till the Son of 
 Righteousness arose with healing in his wings. I 
 beheld the Lamh of God, who taketh away the sins 
 of the world, and had such a sense of the sufficiency 
 of his atonement, as I had not had before, with a 
 conviction that 1 was interested therein. All my 
 fears and doubts disappeared; I found the peace of 
 God: his love was manifested to me, which caused 
 me to love him again. Joy and gratitude now so 
 possessed my heart, that my cup was ready to run 
 over; and my soul being freed from all its bondage, 
 said, God is become my salvation. Now my infidel 
 fears were gone, and the truths of Christianity|ap- 
 appeared to me in the clearest light. Not only my 
 understanding saw, but all my powers felt, the truth, 
 thereof. J had a deep sense of a present God, whom 
 I approached in the name of Jesus, with reverential 
 awe. confidence, gratitude, and love: and couid call 
 him, my God, and my all. 
 
 Ju this happy season, my joy frequently prevented 
 my sleep while my soul was taken up with him, 
 who is altogether lovely; and in extaeies of Joy, in 
 the si illness of ihe night, i oi'ien sung my G:eat 
 Deliverer's sise. All things eathiy appeared so 
 empt; . that i thought nothing iieie below worth a 
 tkou ht, only as it teniied to promote my eterual
 
 MR. BENJAMIN' RHODES. 157 
 
 interest: I only desired grace and glory. I then be- 
 gan to conclude, that my adversaries were quite 
 overthrown, and that I had only to march forward, 
 and take possession of the "Land of Promise." I 
 therefore pressed forward rejoicing for some months. 
 At length, through unwatchfulness, and giving way 
 to levity, my comforts gradually diminished, till, im- 
 perceptibly, I was again drawn into a wilderness- 
 state; and though I was diligent in the outward 
 means, yet 1 had lost the pleasing sensations which 
 I had formerly found therein. 
 
 About this time I was strongly beset with some 
 Calvinists, who used all the arguments in their pow- 
 er to draw me into the belief of their doctrines. I 
 was almost persuaded to believe "final persever- 
 ance," only I did not see how I could separate it 
 from reprobation. I wished to do it, but could not. 
 I thought, if these must necessarily be saved, on 
 whom God begins a good work, then the rest must 
 as necessarily be damned, on whom he does not be- 
 gin it. When 1 considered Jinal perseverance, as it 
 related to myself only, it appeared so pleasant, that 
 I hardly could resist it: but when 1 considered it as 
 a branch of the doctrines of unconditional ejection 
 and reprobation, it gave me pain, and inclined me to 
 renounce it. Reprobation appeared to me quite con- 
 trary to the whole purport of scripture — t;ie nature 
 of a holy, just, and merciful God — ihe state of man 
 as an accountable creature — and to a future judg- 
 ment, where rewards and punishments will be dis- 
 pensed to every man according to his works. How- 
 ever, my lot being east among those who held the 
 decrees, I frequently heard the chief arguments that 
 are used in support thereof. Sometimes their ar- 
 gument;- appeared so plausible, that I began to stag- 
 ger in im mind, and to lie much distressed: I then 
 made U a su »f prayer, and one night, after I 
 
 had b« wreitlittg with God, that lie would lead 
 me iu< t utii, i dreamed oi i , a passage of 
 
 sci kputte, » iticii gave me entire satisfaction. 1 oould
 
 J 58 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 not remember the passage in the morning; but on 
 opening iny bible, the first words I cast my e\es upon 
 were: "The Lord is not slack concerning his pro- 
 mises, as some men count slackness; but i* long suf- 
 fering to us ward, not willing that any should perish, 
 but that all should come to repentance." — 2 Pet. iii. 
 9. Such light and conviction attended the words, 
 as removed every doubt of God's loving all man- 
 kind, and from that day to this, my mind has been 
 established in the comfortable doctrines of general 
 redemption. 
 
 But though I was fixed as to doctrines, yet I did 
 not find, as formerly, such a sweet intercourse with 
 heaven; and foolish desires began to arise again, 
 which formerly seemed to be dead. I had also mtj 
 powerful temptations, and earthly attachments pre- 
 vailed too far upon my affections. Yet the hand of 
 the Li*rd was over me for go&h, and preserved me 
 from the dangers to which I was exposed 
 
 When I was about the age -of twenty-one, I heard 
 Mr. Jaco preach on Iieb. xii. 1. lie insisted on the 
 necessity of lading aside every weight, and the sin 
 which so easily besets us, in order to our running 
 the Christian race: 1 saw (he necessity of it, and 
 was again stirred up, and the Lord once more set 
 me at liberty from every entanglement. In a short 
 time my former comforts returned with more soli- 
 dity, and my understanding was abundantly matured 
 in the knowledge of the Christian warfare. 
 
 About this time I was desired to lead several class- 
 es. I found these meetings were both solemn and 
 profitable to myself and others. The first quarter, 
 several found a sense of forgiveness, and others were • 
 greatly stirred up. J was also desired to speak a 
 word of exportation, this also 1 complied with. I 
 now soon found work enough, as many came to hear 
 what I had got to say. Indeca J have ofteu stood 
 up to speak to a large congregation, when I would 
 rather have undergone almost any punishment. — 
 However, the Loru gave me strength according' to
 
 MR. BENJAMIN RHODES. 159 
 
 my day: for when T have begun (o speak, nay feat* 
 and trembling were quite taken away;, and J frequent- 
 ly found much freedom in sneaking: and I have rea- 
 son to believe that the Lord rendered my weak la- 
 bours useful; for some were turned from their wick- 
 edness to God, some converted, and many stirred up 
 to press forward. 
 
 On a sabbath, I usually preached at several neigh- 
 bouring towns, and sometimes visited them on the 
 week days. 
 
 As the conference drew near, Mr. Jaoo asked me 
 if 1 was willing to travel, suppose there should be a 
 want of preachers? I found much reluctancy to this, 
 arising from a sense of my insurfiei ■■ncv; and I had 
 such a love to the people where I was, that the 
 thought of leaving them gave me great pain; yet I 
 desired not to be governed by my own inclination, 
 but by the providence of God. 
 
 At the conference held at Leeds, 1766, I was de- 
 sired to take a circuit, to which I consented. I set 
 out in the twenty-third year of my age, and went 
 into the Norwich circuit, where I staid two years. 
 The Lord was pleased to own my peor labours here 
 in the conviction and conversion of several souls. 
 
 At the conference in London, 1767, I was taken 
 into fuMcouneclion. My second circuit was in Ox- 
 fordshire, where I stayed two years. In that time 
 the work of the Lord was enlarged abundantly. 
 
 My next remove was to Canterbury, where I stay- 
 ed one year. While f was here, my father died: 
 ince then I have been much in the north, to be near 
 
 y mother and sisters. 
 
 My next remove was into Lincolnshire, where I 
 stayed two years among a poor people, who received 
 the word gladly. We got into some new places, and 
 lu other respects, God gave me some fruit of my la- 
 bours. From hence 1 went to Hull and Scarbo- 
 rough, where ! staved three >ears. Here we raised 
 several new societies, and in several parts of the cir- 
 cuit the work prospered.
 
 1 60 EXPERIENCE, &C 
 
 I next went to Newcastle-upon-Tyne, where 1 
 stayed only one year. Here I'll ail many profitable 
 opportunities, and had also the pleasure of seeing 
 some fruits of my labours. From hence 1 went to 
 Alnwick aril Donbar, where 1 laboured one year. I 
 had much riding here, but being amongst a people 
 whom 1 loved, and with whom I laboured -comforta- 
 jbly, I thought little of fatigues. 
 
 I am now in Sussex and Kent. Since I came into 
 these parts, I have lost a sister and mother, who. I 
 believe, are both gone after m # v father into Abraham's 
 bosom: but I am left behind, almost the only person 
 out of a large family. But bow long or how short 
 my day may be. 1 leave to unerring wisdom: one only 
 concern ought to possess me, to employ it as I 
 ought: then at the close of it, J a*so shall sleep in 
 peace; and after a short absence, be with my dear 
 departed friends,' 
 
 "Thrice happy meeting! 
 "Nor time, nor death, shall ever part us more." 
 
 I am thankful to God that he ever called me to 
 ibis blessed work; as by this means I have gained 
 more strength to my own soul; have been of some 
 use to my fellow creatures; have had an opportunity 
 of knowing a little of the world, and of the state of 
 religion amongst the Methodists and others: all 
 which I judged to be more than a reward for what! 
 hay® done and suffered. 
 
 At present, there is nothing so precious to me as 
 religion and the cause of God, and my principal dod 
 sign is to fill up my little sphere, that when I am 
 called to give an account, I may do it with joy, and 
 not with sorrow. 
 I am, 
 
 Reverend sir, 
 
 Your affectionate son in the gospel, 
 BENJAMIN RHODES.
 
 THE EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 TO THE REV. MR. JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 July 1, 1779. 
 Reverend and dear Sir, 
 
 I WAS born in London, in the year 1741. My 
 father came from Norfolk, and my mother from 
 Cambridgeshire. 'They were very honest and well- 
 meaning persons, and constantly attended the service^ 
 of the church, but I fear, never knew the power of 
 religion. Shortly after they came to London, tbey 
 saw Mr. Whitefield preaching to a great multitude 
 in Moorfieids. As they had never seen, or heard of 
 him before, they stared with great astonishment. — 
 "What he said made some impression on them, and 
 they frequently heard him, till he left England: but 
 when he went to Georgia, they were at a loss what 
 to do, till one told theui they might hear the same 
 kind of preaching at the Foundry: my father went, 
 and heard you. Sir; but the first time he did not un- 
 derstand it, but after a while, he understood you 
 very well; and both he and my mother were truly 
 awakened. Presently after thev were admitted into 
 the society, which they counted a very great privi- 
 lege, and continued therein, serving God and his 
 people as long as they lived. 
 
 As to myself, 1 had couvictions of sin from my 
 childhood. But as 1 grew up, I endeavoured to get 
 rid of them, which was partly effected: but I could 
 not shake off the fear of death. I sometimes tried 
 to comfort myself with the thought, that death was 
 only my common lot among the rest of mankind; 
 1* *
 
 It32 EXPERIENCE Ql' 
 
 but if I apprehended it near, I was terrified beyond 
 expression. One Sabbath afternoon, when I had 
 sauntered up and down St. James's Park, I went into 
 Westminster Abbey, not for devotion, but to pass 
 away time. I had not been there long befor ' I was 
 struck with an horrible dread! my sins were set in 
 array against lue! I hastened out of the church, but 
 did not expect to get home alive. I seemed ready 
 to expire, and was, to my own apprehension, 
 
 "Condemn'd the second death to feel, 
 "Arrested by the pains of hell!" 
 
 [ cried to the Lord in an agony of fear, who heard 
 me from his holy place, and came to my deliverance. 
 My dread and horror were in a measure removed, 
 and I resolved never more to spend any part of the 
 Sabbath in merely seeking my own pleasure. 
 
 When I was about fourteen vears of age. mv fa- 
 ther put me out to a person who feared God: while 
 I was with him, I had frequent visitations from God, 
 and fell the drawings of his blessed spirit, though I 
 too of<en resisted them. However, I became more 
 serious, which was increased by two severe fits of 
 illness. Before this, I had been exceedingly fond of 
 going to plays, yet never went without a dread upon 
 my spirits. When I was there, I always seemed as 
 one treading on forbidden ground, and particularly, 
 one night, when two persons were trampled to death, 
 in crouding up the same passage which I had but 
 just before got up. 
 
 I~%lso took great delight in reading plays, for 
 which purpose I collected a number of the best I 
 could meet with, and often pleaded myself and my 
 companions with the repetition of some of the most 
 striking passages in them. But I found nothing of 
 this kind could give me any real happiness, and was 
 constrained to say, 'this also is vanity!' it will not 
 satisfy an immortal spirit; it will not ease si wound- 
 ed mind! At last, from a full conviction of this, I 
 committed all my plays to the flames, and determin- 
 ed to spend my leisure hours in reading more profi-
 
 MR. THOMAS TENNANT. 163 
 
 table books. I therefore read your "Appeal to Men 
 of Reason and Religion." with much satisfaction. 
 Yet on reading the former part of your sermon, en- 
 titled, •♦The Almost Christian," I was quite distress- 
 ed, and ready to give up all hope. 1 thought this 
 almost Christian to leave*me so far behind, that to 
 be quite a Christian seems impossible to me. flnt 
 when I had turned over the next leaf, and saw what 
 was necessary to make me a true Christian, viz: 
 '•The love of God." my heart was softened, and my 
 It opes revived. I said, "this is religion, this is Chris- 
 tianity indeed! and this, Lord, is the very thing I 
 want! O give me this love, and I shall be satisfied, 
 and all within me shall bless thy name!" 
 
 Frequently, when I have heard you preach, 1 
 thought you appeared as with a sword drawn in your 
 hand, with which you cleft me asuc ler. At such 
 times, the word was indeed quick and powerful, 
 piercing and wounding my inmost soul: it was indeed 
 a discerner of the thoughts and intents of my heart; 
 but it still left me without comfort to bewail my 
 wretched condition. Thus I went on, till my bur- 
 then grew too heavy to be borne. I mourned all the 
 day long. My distress was very great, and I wanted 
 to speak tor some experienced person; but being na- 
 turally very close and reserved, I could not break 
 through. I was glad indeed when one asked me to 
 go to a meeting of Christian friends; but when I 
 came to the door, and heard them singing, I had 
 such an idea both of their goodness, and of my own 
 unworthiness, that I durst not presume to go in: 
 therefore I walked back again with a heavy heart. 
 
 Some time after this I joined the society, but for 
 a long time durst not venture to go to the Lord's ta- 
 ble. One Sabbath I was determined to go, but when 
 I approached my heart failed me, and I went back 
 without receiving; but, through the distress of my 
 mind, my legs were scarce able to support me, and 
 being filled with fear, guilt, and shame, I trembled 
 exceedingly: however, at last, as a poor, weary, hea-
 
 164 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 ▼y laden sinner, who hud nothing to plead, but "God 
 be merciful to me for Christ's gake.* I ventured to 
 eat of that bread, and rlrin|k of that cup. Just be- 
 fo e I came up to the table, these words were deeply 
 impressed upon my mind, 
 
 "Covered with thy blood we are, 
 "Find a part that does not arm, 
 "And strike the sinner there." 
 
 This inspire?! me with such courage, that I kneel- 
 ed down with a strong hope that I should not be a 
 victim to God's justice, but a monument of his mer- 
 cy: and when Dr. J. gave me the bread and wine, I 
 was enabled to believe that Christ died for me, and 
 was filled with peace in the Holy Ghost. I rose 
 from the table with a glad heart, greatly rejoicing 
 in God my Saviour. 
 
 After this I walked in the loviqg fear of the Lord, 
 and in the comforts of the Holy Ghost. I found 
 great sweetness in the word; yea, and in all the other 
 means of grace. Indeed, some of the most delight- 
 ful moments of my whole life were spent in waiting 
 upon God in his ordinances. I enjoyed great tran- 
 quility of spirit, being delivered from my guilty, 
 tormenting fears of death and hell. When I laid my 
 body down to rest, I could repose my soul as on the 
 bosom of Jesus, and say, 
 
 "What if death my sleep invade! 
 "Shall I be of death afraid? 
 "Whilst encircled by thine arm, 
 "Death may strike, but cannot harm. 
 "What if beams of op'ning day 
 "Shine around my breathless clay, 
 "Brighter visions from on high, 
 "Shall regale my mental eye." 
 
 Meantime I found an earnest desire to live to the 
 glorj of God, together with much love to precious 
 souls. And hence 1 found a desire of preaching; on 
 mentioning which. I was desired to go with a friend, 
 who occasionally exhorted a few people at a house 
 in St. George's Fields. At itis request, I ventured
 
 MR. THOMAS TENNANT. 165 
 
 to speak a few words to (hem, and found freedom of 
 spirit. 
 
 About this time T had a great desire to (ravel with 
 yon. Sir. Whet' vnti was informed of it, jou was so 
 kind as (o consent to it: so I had the pleasure of ac- 
 companying you from March 1770, .to August fol- 
 lowing, when I was admitted on trial as a travelling 
 preacher, and appointed for the Newcastle circuit. 
 
 I helieve very few. if any, of our preachers, set 
 out with so little courage: the depression Sf spirit I 
 laboured under was nearly insupportable, and if it 
 had not been for the affection unci tenderness of my 
 good friend Mr. Jaco, who was at that time the as- 
 sistant, I must have stink under the burden. The 
 loving, sensible people I laboured among, were also 
 very kind to me. and bore with use. though 1 was 
 with them in weakness, fear, and much trembling. 
 
 The next conference I was sent into Lincolnshire, 
 where I met with many trials, having both the in- 
 ward and outward cross to bear. Afterwards f was 
 near a year among the poor loving people at Col- 
 chester, and 1 hope my labour was not in vain. 
 
 From thence I went to Brad forth in Yorkshire, 
 and the year following, to Newcastle again. I had 
 now a little mote courage than when I was there be- 
 fore; and I trust, was more useful to the people: and 
 from that time I have travelled with more satisfac- 
 tion than ever I did before. 
 
 At present I find a thankful heart for the mercies 
 of a gracious God, and desire to devote myself un- 
 reservedly to his service. Indeed it is comfortable 
 to me to reflect, that God is love; that he was in 
 Christ reconciling the world unto himself; that 
 Christ Jesus gave himself a ransom for all; that he 
 tasted death for every man; that he is the propitia- 
 tion for the sins of the whole world; and i have often 
 wondered how any man of sense, who has tasted that 
 the Lord is gracious, can use arguments in opposi- 
 tion to this. But as to the dispute concerning these 
 points, I very seldom mention it in public; never,
 
 166 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 unless my subject Jly loads to if: and eve^ 
 
 ti.en. I do it in as few, and as calm words as possi 
 ble, for J arn quite convinced, that a thousand excla 
 im riniis at.d assertions be they ever so vehemently 
 delivered:, will not amount to one argument «>n either 
 side the question. But what I wish above all things 
 is, that I may increase in the knowledge and love of 
 God, and be more holy, happy, and useful, everyday 
 of my life. Nevertheless, ! am truly thankful for, 
 and profiled by, the superior talents and labours of 
 u< y of my brethren, who are more particularly call- 
 ed to explain and defend these glorious truths which 
 1 have always believed. 
 
 Upon the whole, as far as I know myself, 1 love 
 the Lord Jesus Christ in sincerity; and if he is pleas- 
 ed to continue to use, in any degree, me, his weak, 
 unworthy creature, I shall be unfeitrnedly thankful, 
 and hope to give him all the praise in time and 
 eternity. 
 
 I am, reverend and dear Sir, as ever, 
 Your dutiful son and servant, 
 
 THOMAS TENNANT, 
 
 THE EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 TO THE REV. MR. JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 Augnat 18, 1779. 
 
 Reverend and dear Sir, 
 
 ACCORDING to your desire. I take the oppor- 
 tunity to write a little of the dealings of God with 
 me. but as 1 have not kept an account in writing, 
 many things have slipped my mind. 
 
 I was born in Northumberland, at a little village 
 near PJacey, in the >car 1728. 1 was put to school
 
 Mil. WILLIAM HUNTER. 167 
 
 early, and tnu-;*tf to trail (lie script ures from a child: 
 but d< • lighted most in < lie h>tst< '■■ i! parts of ti.ein. 
 I felt a decree of < he fear of God when vevy v. mug, 
 and sweet drawings of love Rut sqinetimes the 
 thoughts of death were very dreadful 1 *» me. so ;',..it 
 1 felt very unhappy. I otiee dreamed that Satan came 
 to me, and would have me: when I awaked, I was 
 full of fear, and prayed much that I might he deli- 
 vered (Vom him: and the impressions abode upon my 
 mind for many days: but as i had nobodj i<> teach 
 me the right way of coming to Christ, tUese good 
 impressions gradually wore off. 
 
 \Vhen I was about fourteen, my father being a far- 
 mer, I was put to learn all the branches of farming. 
 My father was very severe with me, and 1 dreaded 
 him very much: and yet I was often guilty of much 
 disobedience against him. for which I have been 
 much ashamed before the Lord. 
 
 The first time you came to Plaeey, L with seve- 
 ral of mt faiber's family, came to hear you: some 
 of my brothers Mere mush taken with you, and, I 
 trust, will have cause to hies* God for it iorever. 
 
 When I was about sixteen, I heard Mr, Hopper; 
 as soon as he began to speak, his words affected me 
 deeply, net with terror, but with love. 1 had a (aste 
 of heaven: it seemed ;>,s though 1 was created anew: 
 there was a wonderful change in my tempers and 
 conduct; l laid aside every thing that I thought was 
 contrary to the will of God, am! practised ail reli- 
 gious duties, i led preaching on all occasions? 
 Jgand felt much sweetness therein, and love to those 
 I that I believe were »:i j voted to God. 
 
 I weiU on iu this way for some time, till my com- 
 panions began to take notice of me, and eail me a 
 Methodist. Seme of them set upon toe one Sabbath, 
 and cursed aud swore bitterly at me, telling me I 
 was going to leave the church, and the religion I 
 was brought up in. This had a strange effect upon 
 me: I gave way to them: they prevailed upon me to 
 go to the ale-house: there i was overtaken in my old
 
 163 EXTEKISNCE OF 
 
 sins again. The spirit of the Lord departed from 
 me: my heart became as hard as a stone. Darkness 
 covered my mind again, and 1 was as senseless to the 
 things ol God, as though I had never known any 
 thing at all about them. 
 
 1 went on in this wretched state manv months, liv- 
 ing totally without God in the world. Through the 
 advice of a young man, I went to hear preaching 
 again. A great light was communicated to my un- 
 derstanding by the word, and it pierced my consci- 
 ence like a sword. 1 felt my inmost parts to be very 
 wickedness; all the sins of my life stared me in the 
 face, and lay as a heavy burden upon my conscience. 
 I roared for disquietness of heart, and wept and made 
 supplication. I was convinced J could not help my- 
 self; that I could not do any thing to reconcile my- 
 self to God, and I had many fears lest the day of 
 grace was past. Oh, the distress of soul I went 
 through for many months! it was as though I had 
 been forsaken of God, and hell was already begun 
 in me. But the Lord was pleased to give me power 
 over sin. J forsook every sinful way, and all my 
 sinful companions. 1 sought the Lord with all my 
 heart in all the means of grace. 1 attended preach- 
 ing on all occasions, and read the scriptures with 
 great diligence: tlieway of salvation, revealed there- 
 in through Christ, was made clear to me; and I 
 pleaded nothing but the merits of Christ for forgive- 
 ness. I olten rose in the night to read and pray, 
 and the language ol m> heart was, 
 
 "If I ne'er find the sacred road, 
 "1*11 perish crying out for God." 
 
 I felt great love to the Methodists especially to 
 the preachers, as the servants of the most high God 
 sent to teach us the vvay of salvation. The people 
 look notice of me, talked with me, and wished me 
 to east in my lot amongst them, i did so. though f 
 di>] r »(/t think my sell worthy; and t hiess God. I have 
 never felt a desire til leave 1 hem since, 1 continued 
 mourning after the Lord, and, at length, he aeard
 
 MR. WILLIAM HUNTER. 169 
 
 my <?ry« One day, as I remember, I was reading in 
 n book, where the writer was answering that objec- 
 tion, concerning the day of grace being past: the 
 Lord was pleased to send me deliverance; I found 
 springing hope, and a sense of his goodness. How 
 did I admire the love of God, and the love of Jesus 
 Christ to me ! All my thoughts were swallowed up 
 in heavenly contemplation: and I could truly say, 
 "The Lord is my life and my salvation, whom shall 
 I fear? Thine anger is turned away, and thou eoni- 
 fortest me." 
 
 I now tried what the spirit had wrought in me by 
 the marks laid down in the holy scripture, and 
 hence I found reason to believe, that I belonged to 
 Christ, and was a child of G,»d. 1 made a free-will 
 offering of all I had, to be his forever; and I thank 
 him from the ground of my heart, that I have been 
 kept in the same mind to this day: though I have 
 great cause to be ashamed that 1 have made no bet- 
 ter improvement, and often mourn aud weep on that 
 account. 
 
 When I had thus found the goodness of God to my 
 own soul. 1 could not forbear speaking of it to others; 
 and the Lord gave me wonderful light and courage 
 in his blessed work. He helped me to reprove sin 
 wherever I met with it, with humility, meekness and 
 much praver: yet without fearing the face of any 
 man, though many said I was out of my mind, yea, 
 and wished me out of the world. The Lord enabled 
 me lo set my face as a flint, and to bear a testimony 
 for him, wherever I went; and I was much blessed 
 in so doing. 
 
 There was a little town not far from ours, where 
 I sometimes wem,got a few poor people together, 
 and talked to them about their souls. I often read 
 the scriptures to ihem, and sometimes made some 
 remarks thereon. Toe Lord was .leased to bless 
 my weak endeavors among them; so that a few of 
 the Ltheredtogeihcr, and the preacher joined 
 them m a society, aud put me iu*io be the leader. 
 13
 
 lTO experience or 
 
 I met with many trials in this little way, ami was 
 often tempted to give it up; but I durst not. 
 
 I used to travel far on the Lord's day, to hear the 
 word of God. If it happened the preacher did not 
 come, I was pressed upon to give an exhortation to 
 the people. This I frequently did, but I often went 
 home distressed to the last degree, through a deep 
 sense of my own unworthiness:yet it was not always 
 so. At other times I was happy and lively, having 
 strong evidence that I was doing the will of God. 
 Meantime several of the preachers spoke to me 
 about travelling; but the importance of the work 
 made me afraid: till in the year 1769, at the London 
 conference, Mr. Rowel recommended me, and 1 was 
 taken in upon trial. I was then appointed for the 
 Barnard Castle circuit, and entered upon my work 
 with great fear; there seemed many difficulties in my 
 way: however, I gave myself up to the Lord, and he 
 was pleased to give me favor in the eyes of the 
 people. 
 
 Two years after, I was stationed in Yarm circuit. 
 I was afterwards appointed to Barnard Castle cir- 
 cuit again, artd God was pleased to bless my labors, 
 with that of the other preachers. We had such a 
 work of God in several parts of this circuit as I ne- 
 Ter saw. Hardly any thing of the kind in England 
 hath exceeded it, both with regard to its swiftness 
 and depth: the power of God bore down all before it, 
 and it seemed as if God was about to convert all the 
 world. 
 
 After I left this circuit, I was placed at Hull, then 
 at York, and afterwards in the Scarborough circuit. 
 We had a gracious increase of the work of God here; 
 and I never found more enlargement of heart. We 
 broke up much fresh ground, took in many new plai- 
 ces, and many souls were converted to God. The 
 last year you appointed me for the Thirsk circuit. 
 This has been a year of trial, but the Lord has stood 
 hy me, and 1 am strengthened. 
 
 What success I may have for time to come, lean-
 
 :-iR. WILLIAM HUNTER. 171 
 
 not tell. It is still my one desire to give myself 
 wholly to ihe Lord, and to his blessed work. I wish 
 to live to better purpose than I have yet done, to be 
 more fruitful in his house, and in the world. I am 
 conscious of many defects in myself, and feel my 
 need of Christ every moment. My soul hangs upon 
 him, and I experience salvation from day to day: 
 and I trust, he that has kept me till now, will keep 
 me to the end. 
 
 Wishing you all peace and prosperity, I remain-, 
 Rev. and dear sir, Your affectionate son, 
 in the gospel of Christ, 
 
 WILLIAM HUNTER. 
 
 POSTSCRIPT. 
 
 Richmond, August 29, 1779. 
 
 "CONCERNING the account I gave you at Lou- 
 don, as I wrote it in haste, I believe it is very imper- 
 fect; several things have occurred to my miud since, 
 which I should have put in, if I had then remember- 
 ed (hem. 
 
 As touching that great salvation, being saved 
 from inbnd sin, I shall simply relate what 1 know 
 of the dealings of God with me in this respect. 
 
 For some time after 1 knew the goodness of God 
 to my soul, I was very happy: I sung in his ways 
 for joy of heart, and Ei is consolations were not 
 small in me. I thought indeed, I should learn war 
 no more. It was then 
 
 I rode on the sky, 
 
 Freely justified I, 
 Nor envied Elijah his seat: 
 
 My soul mounted higher, 
 
 In a chariot of fire, 
 And the moon it was under my feet! 
 
 Jisos all the day long - , 
 
 Was my joy and my song', 
 O that all his salvation may see' 
 
 He hath lov'd me, I cry'd. 
 
 He hath suffer d and dy'd» 
 To redeem «»ch a rebel as me.
 
 9J3, EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 - But afterwards it pleased infinite wisdom to open 
 a new scene to me; I began to be exercised with 
 many uncommon temptations, ond felt my own heart 
 ready to comply with the same; this brought me in- 
 to great straits, and I began to call in question the 
 work of grace in my soul. O! the pain and anguish 
 I felt for weeks together! Yet all this whrle I was 
 very earnest with the Lord, my soul clave to him, 
 and I often said. «« Though he slay me, yet I will 
 trust in him.*' Under this exercise I learned several 
 things: as first, that my nature was not so much 
 changed as I thought; I found many things in me 
 which opposed the grace of God/ so that without 
 continual watching and prayer, I was capable of 
 committing the very same sins which I had been 
 guilty of before. 2. I began to be more acquainted 
 with satan's devices, and found power from God to 
 resist them. 3. 1 had very affecting views of Christ 
 as my great high priest, who was touched with a 
 feeling of all my infirmities. 4. The scriptures 
 were precious to me, and I found great comfort in 
 reading them. And lastly, I was conscious of the 
 need of a far greater change in my nature than I 
 had yet experienced: but 1 then read mostly the 
 Calvinists writings, who all write, that sin must be 
 in believers till death: yet I found my mind at times 
 deeply engaged in prayer to be saved from all sin. 
 
 Thus I went on for a long time, sometimes up and 
 sometimes down, till it pleased God to bring me to 
 hear you at Newcastle. You preached I well remem- 
 ber, from the first epistle of John, chap, i, verse 9. 
 "If we confess our sins, God is faithful and just to 
 forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all un- 
 righteousness." This was a precious time to me. — 
 While you were preaching, a divine light shone in 
 upon my heart with the word, and I was elearly 
 convinced of the doctrine of sanctifieation, and the 
 attainableness of it. I came home with full purpose 
 of heart, not to rest till 1 was made a living witness
 
 I'IR. WILLIAM HUNTER. ITS 
 
 of it. I had now a clear view, 1, Of (he holiness of 
 God, and saw that sin could not dwell with him. 
 2, F had a clear view of the purity and perfection of 
 his law, which is a transcript of the divine nature. 
 And 3, I felt my great unlikeness to hoth : and al- 
 though I felt no condemnation; yet in the view of 
 these things, I felt much pain in my spirit, and my 
 soul was humbled in the dust before him ! Oh! how 
 I longed to be made like him. to love him with all 
 my heart, soul, mind and strength. I had glorious 
 discoveries of the grand provision made in the New 
 Covenant, for the complete salvation of the soul; and 
 I went on in joyful expectation, crying to the Lord 
 to put me in possession of all he had purchased for 
 me, and promised to me: sometimes I seemed to be 
 upon the threshold, just stepping into glorious liber- 
 ty; but again fear and unbelief prevailed, and I 
 started back. This cast my mind into great per- 
 plexity, and 1 often reasoned concerning the truth 
 of the thing. 
 
 It would be tedious to relate the various exercised 
 1 went through for several years, without opening 
 my mind to any one. 1 do not remember that 1 ever 
 conversed with one upon the subject, or ever heard 
 any one discourse upon it. Only, 1 think, about 
 eighteen years ago, it pleased God that 1 heard Mr. 
 Olivers preach a sermon upon the subject. His 
 text was, "Let us go on unto perfection." His doc- 
 trine was clear, and his arguments stroug. My 
 heart consented to the whole truth, and I had clear- 
 er views of the way of attaining it, namely by faith, 
 than ever before. This added new vigor to my 
 spirit, and 1 seemed to be more on the wing than 
 ever. I prayed and wept at his foot-stool, that he 
 wouid shew me all bis salvation. And he gave me 
 to experien«e such a measure of his grace, as i 
 never knew before: a great measure of heavenly 
 light and divine power,spread through all my soul: 
 1 found unbelief taken away out of my heart : my 
 soul was tilled with siw;h faith as 1 never felt before: 
 15 *
 
 2f4 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 my love to Christ was like fire, and I had 9iieh 
 views of him. as my life, my portion, mj all, as 
 swallowed me up: and oh] how I longed to he with 
 him! A <-hange passed upon all the powers of my *oul 
 and I felt a great increase of holy and heavenly tem- 
 pers. I may say, with humility* it was as though I 
 was empt ed of all evil, and filled with heaven and 
 God. 
 
 Thus, under the influence of his power and grace, 
 i rode upon the sky. My soul fed on angel's food, 
 and 1 truly eat the hread of heaven. 1 had more 
 glorious discoveries than ever of the gospel of God 
 our Saviour, and especially in his saving the soul 
 from all sin. 1 enjoyed such an eMdence of this in 
 my own mind, as put me beyond all doubt; and yet 1 
 never had such a sense of my own littleness, help- 
 Jessness and unworthiness, as now. So true it is, 
 that only grace can humble the soul ! 
 
 From the time the Lord gave me to experience 
 this grace, 1 became an advocate for the glorious 
 doctrine of Christian perfection. According to the 
 gift he has been pleased to give me, {£T° I bear a 
 testimoy of it wherever 1 go, and I never find my 
 soul so happy as when 1 preach most upon this bless- 
 ed subject. 
 
 Thus 1 hare simply related what 1 know of the 
 work of God in my heart. 1 desire to give him all 
 the glory. But 1 have great cause to be ashamed 
 before him for my uuiaithfulness. 1 feel 1 need his 
 grace every moment: 1 stand by faith, 1 have as 
 much need of Christ as ever: 1 may truly say, "Eve- 
 rv moment, Lord, 1 want the merit of thy death." 
 Glorv be to his name 1 find mv soul uniied to 
 him, and my heart cries, none but Christ ! 1 am 
 kept b\ his power: 1 enjoy salvation: my heart is fix- 
 ed, my anchor is sure and stedfast : 1 beiieve noth- 
 ing shall separate me from the love of God, which 
 is in Christ Jesus. 
 
 I conclude with saving, though the whole of our 
 salvation is from the Lord, yet he deals with us as
 
 MR. WILLIAM HUNTER. 275 
 
 rational creatures. He gives us light and convic- 
 tion of our lost state: then the heart is kumhled, 
 and the soul bows before him. He then speaks 
 peace. This is done in a moment, and faith in the 
 soul is the instrumental root of all Christian bali- 
 ness. Thus the work of satidifieation is begun in 
 the heart, and the person is in a capacity of living 
 to God, and growing in grace. If he finds us faith- 
 ful in a little, he shwws us there is a state of greater 
 liberty provided fur us. The soul being oj.eu to the 
 divine teaching, he shews us our want of this. We 
 seek it with our whole heart, and he is pleased to 
 put us in possession of it. This too, is generally 
 given in a moment, and perfectly frees the mind 
 from all evil tempers, and enables us to love the 
 Lord with all our hearts, and our neighbors as our- 
 selves. 
 
 Being thus perfected in love, we are much more 
 qualified to grow in grace, and in the knowledge of 
 our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ, than ever. O 
 precious salvation! Let me ever be a witness of it. 
 
 THE EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 HER* »0»W &HL22T* 
 
 TO THE REV. MR. JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 September, 1779* 
 Reverend and dear Sir, 
 
 I WAS born at Chapel-in-the-Frith, Derbyshire, 
 
 in June. 1737. My parents were honest labouring 
 people, and brought up eight children, all yet living; 
 most of them convinced of sin. and some convened 
 to God. As my atiier wa9 a Churchman, and my 
 mother a Presbyterian, I went sometimes to church, 
 and sometimes to the meeting: and frequently I went 
 with iny mother to hear the Methodists, among 
 whom 1 had several relations. 1 stood iu awe of
 
 jfb' EXPERIENCE OI 
 
 these, and when I was in their company, behaved 
 more seriously than at other times. 
 
 From eight to ten years of age, I had many seri- 
 ous I ' ghts, especially when it thundered and light- 
 ened, or when 1 heard a passing bell: and I was al- 
 ways preserved from swearing, drunkenness, and 
 other scandalous sins. But I delighted much in 
 dancing, singing, and cards, and in making every om> 
 inerry wherever I was. 
 
 When I was about sixteen, I was deeply convinced 
 of sin by reading the eighth chapter of Jeremiah: 
 particularly these words, "The harvest is past, the 
 summer is ended, and we are not saved." I conclud- 
 ed that mv day of grace was past, and that there re- 
 mained for me nothing but judgment and fiery in- 
 dignation. The thought of this almost broke my 
 heart, and caused me to weep bitterly before the 
 Lord. But after a time I grew as careless as before, 
 and continued so for above five years, only with in- 
 tervals of seriousness, and many good desires, but 
 none brought to good effects. My great hindrance 
 was, the being joined with a society of singers. I 
 found I could not stay with them and be religious, so 
 1 thought 1 would give religion up for the present; 
 but at times i was of all men the most miserable. 
 
 Another affliction soon came upon me. I was 
 from a child very foud of my mother, and often 
 thought i could not bear to live after her. In March 
 1739, she died. This awakened me once more. I 
 resolved to break off at once, and to seek God with 
 all my heart. My companions thinking I had only 
 left them through grief, and would soon return, said 
 nothing to me at first: but bv and by, when they 
 heard I was turned Methodist, they set upon me in 
 earnest. But by the grace of God I withstood all, 
 and came out from among them. 
 
 At that time we had no preaching near us. I of- 
 ten went twelve miles on a Sabbath to hear a ser- 
 mon. But in September following, Mr. Crab came 
 to preach at (Jhinjey, and joined a few together in a
 
 JIU. JOHN ALLEN. 277 
 
 society: I willingly cast in my lot among them, and 
 blessed be Goii, have never repented of : f. \hout 
 Christmas I got VI r. John Oliver to preach at my 
 father's house. We bad no more nre>ehing there 
 for some time. However, three of us continued to 
 meet together, t o sing, and pray, and converse He 
 evening, when we were met, I was in sueh distress* 
 that I concluded I could live no longer, if God did 
 not pardon my sins. Presently 1 heard a voice say- 
 ing, "It is J: be not afraid." I looked about, to see 
 who it was that spoke; but could see no one. — How- 
 ever, my mind was refreshed for a season, and 1 re- 
 mained between hope and fear till we met again. 
 As I was then crying to the Lord, these words 
 came strongly to me. "The Lord is at hand! The 
 Lord is at hand!" But neither did the impression 
 made by this, continue long. Soon after I gave 
 way to trifling, and so grieved the Holy Spirit, that 
 I hardly dared to look up, or hope for mercy. But 
 while I was overwhelmed, and feebly crving out, 
 "I am oppressed! Lord, undertake for me:" these 
 words were applied, "Why art thou cast down, O my 
 soul! and why art thou disquieted within me? Put 
 thy trust in God." This comforted me much. But 
 still I could not rest, without a clear sense of my 
 being reconciled to God. I was one dav crving to 
 God for this, and wrestling with him in prayer, 
 when I felt the love of God shed abroad in my heart, 
 and was constrained to cry out, 
 
 "For sinners like me, 
 "He bled on the tree, 
 "Ah, who would not love such a Saviour as thee." 
 
 Now I could say, I know that my Redeemer liveth. 
 
 My soul was filled with peace, and I rejoiced in hope 
 
 of the glory of God. Soon after we began to have 
 
 constant preaching; and a little class was formed, of 
 
 which I was appointed leader. I loved meeting in 
 
 class; but I trembled at being the leader: nevertheless 
 
 I took up my cross. And many times it proved a 
 
 blessing both to the people and to my own soul.
 
 178 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 Before this I had many thoughts about preaching, 
 but I saw not how it could he, as I was deeplj sensi- 
 ble of my own ignorance. This I often laid before 
 the Lord, praying him to give me full proof, if it 
 was his will. Meanwhile I sometimes gave a word 
 of exhortation, which il pleased God to make use- 
 ful. This encouraged me to speak again; but it was 
 with fear and tr» udling; and I often thought, <*If I 
 get this time over. I will speak no more." — Thus I 
 went on for more than twelve months, before I at- 
 tempted to take a text. After I had exhorted and 
 preached about four years, I was, in the year 1766, 
 received on trial as a travelling preacher. And al- 
 though my heart was in the work, yet I was fre- 
 quently tempted to give it up: hut God suffered 
 me not. He again and again refreshed my soul 
 therein, and encouraged me to go on, by letting me 
 see the fruit of my labors. 
 
 Several years after, I had thoughts of altering my 
 condition. Upon this I consulted my best friends. I 
 gave* myself to prayer; and, after much deliberation? 
 married Miss Jane Westall, of which I never had 
 cause to repent it. We lived together in perfect har- 
 mony, till, on the 30th of June last, she was seized 
 with the epidemic distemper. At first we were not 
 apprehensive it was the fever: though she herself 
 judged it was, and believed it was the messenger of 
 death. As her fever increased, and her end drew 
 nearer, she was happier and happier. She said very 
 little to me about dying; because she was sensible 
 it would give me more affliction than I should be 
 well able to bear. But to others she spoke freely 
 concerning it; and, with the greatest composure, she 
 jsaid, "I shall soon be 
 
 "Far from a world of grief and sin, 
 "With God eternally shut in." 
 
 The Tuesday before her death she seemed to be 
 quite transported with joy. When I went up stairs, 
 1 found her with hearen in her look, repeating the 
 following lines:
 
 MR. JOHN ALLEN. i/f 
 
 "The world recedes; it disappears; 
 
 •'H«aven opens on my eyes! 
 "My ears with sounds seraphic ring": 
 
 ''L-nd lend your wings! 
 "I mount! I fly! 
 
 "O grave where is thy victory! 
 "O death where is thy sting? ' 
 
 On Friday she seemed iike one from above.— 
 There was in her such a* spirit of love and grati- 
 tude, as I never saw before in any creature. She 
 thanked and blessed every one that did the least 
 thing for her. She often prayed, that God would 
 reward me for all my kindness towards her, and 
 broke out, "My Lord! my God! my Father! my 
 Husband! my Friend! I long to «ee t :ee!" When 
 she could speak no longer, 1 desired, if her soul was 
 happy, to lift up her hand. This she immediately 
 did, and soon after fell asleep. 
 
 By her death I lost one of the best of wives, and 
 my two small children one of the best of mothers. 
 In many things she was a pattern to the flock of 
 Christ; particularly in plainness of dress and of 
 speech, in neatness, in every relative duty, as well 
 as in private prayer. This I never remember her 
 to have omitted three times a day. Had any told 
 me before hand, how I should be able to bear her 
 death, I could not have believed it. None but God 
 can tell what I felt. But I did not feel a murmur- 
 ing thought; nor ever, for one moment, imagined 
 that God had dealt hardly with me. I could still say, 
 
 "Thy medicine puts me to great smart! 
 "Thou wound' st me in the tenderest part! 
 "But 'tis with a design to cure: 
 "I must, I will the touch endure. 
 "All that I priz'd below is gone: 
 "Yet, Father, still thy will be done!" 
 
 I am now more convinced than ever, that reli- 
 gion does not turn us into stocks and stones; that it 
 is intended, not to root out, but to regulate our pas- 
 sions; and that there may be the most sensible feel*
 
 280 EXPERIENCE OE 
 
 ings, with full resignation to the will of God. This, 
 1 bless God is my own experienee. I have been 
 telling the people, that God would give suffering 
 grace for suffering times: and, I am now a living 
 proof of it. As I have endeavoured to waier others, 
 God hath watered me again; and not as waters iliat 
 fail, but as a fountain of water springing up with- 
 in my Soul. 
 
 Let the Lord now "do with me as seemeth him 
 
 good.' 5 
 
 "HI praise him for all that is past, 
 "And trust him lor all that's to come." 
 
 Hitherto the Lord has been my helper, and he 
 is the same forever. So far as I know my own 
 heart, 1 have no desire but to live to his glory, 
 and to promote, so far us^l am able, the interest of 
 my Kedeemer. My greatest grief is, that 1 do not 
 love God more, and that i have not more of heaven 
 i i my heart. 
 
 1 bless God, I have for twenty years been steady 
 in my principles, having never, that I know of, how- 
 ever I was tempted, wavered for one hour. 1 have 
 read many things on the other side of the question, 
 but was not in the least shaken. 1 still believe, that 
 Christ gave himself a ransom for all; and that, by 
 the grace of God he tasted death for every man, that 
 he mi^ht redeem us from all iniquity, and purify 
 unto himself a peculiar people, zealous of good 
 works. 
 
 If this imperfect account may be of use to any, it 
 will answer the end that is wished for, by 
 Reverend and dear Sir, 
 
 \our sou in the gospel, 
 
 JOHN ALLEN.
 
 THE EXPERIENCE 0F 
 
 MR. THOMAS HANSON. 
 
 Croivan, March 11, 1780. 
 
 IT is very difficult to write, where self is concern- 
 ed. But as I am requested* I slnili endeavor to give 
 a brief account of tho»e circumstances in my life, 
 which particularly discover the divine pity towards 
 me. 
 
 I was burn of honest parents, in Hnrbury, near 
 Wakefield, in the county of York, I think in May, 
 1733, the vounger of two sons at a birth* my parents 
 having had six sons, and two daughters. He that 
 was horn with me, died in his childhood. My father 
 died when I was near eleven years old. Six out of 
 the seven of us that lived, have found mercy and for- 
 giveness through Christ. My truly pious mother 
 had the happiness to see it before she died, though 
 she has been dead above twenty years. Two of my 
 elder brothers fell into sin, and turned back: but 
 one is restored. I hope, to favor and to heaven; the 
 other is not yet recovered: but oh. may he be soon! 
 
 We have always lived in love and harmony. I nev- 
 er had, to my knowledge, twenty angry words with 
 either brother or sister, in my lite I do not remem- 
 ber to have heard an oath in all the family. About 
 thirty-four jears ago, my mother and three elder 
 brothers were brought to God. i was then convin- 
 ced, and a little awakened, by hearing Mr. Francis 
 Scott. The very man, (I think) by whom m> ever 
 dear mother had been awakened and brought to God. 
 Frouj that time my good desires did not quite leave 
 me. 1 hope my mother's prayers, tears, and adviee, 
 will nevtr leave my mind and heart, i was a thought- 
 less, careless. Christ less son, before that lime, and 
 had no tear of God before my eyes. 
 16
 
 182 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 I was placed, a* ahoui thirteen years of age, in 
 llie profession which my father and hr other 9 had 
 followed, viz. a clothier. 1 now often went to hear 
 the Methodist |>rea<hers, though we liad some miles 
 to go. Many of those that are now, I doubt not, 
 singing in heaven, used to go and eome with me in 
 the evening, through the woods; often singing these 
 sweet words: 
 
 •'Break forth into singing, ye trees of the wood; 
 "For Jsscs is bringing- lost sinneis to God " 
 
 I used to pray inwardly on toy way to the preach- 
 ing; yea. and often turned aside to pray. 1 was 
 afraid to he seen or known to pra> alone: so 1 sought 
 out every private place that I con d. 
 
 Wei had much persecution then, and a great deal 
 of talk about false prophets in sheep's elotiiing. — 
 But the most common name for them was, ihe 
 damnation preachers: which I thought was l\iv from 
 sheep's clothing. So thtit did not hinder me much. 
 But I was greatly troubled with horrid suggestions, 
 and had many fears (nu doubt from the wicked one) 
 in private prayer: so luat 1 was for quite laying it 
 aside. 1 was afraid to go to it; and yet I durst not 
 give it over. 1 was in a strait on another account; 
 I was ashamed of the gospel: I did not stand firm, 
 on God's side; and yet i durst not be on the devil's 
 9idf. I was very fearful of being deceived, reason- 
 ing and doubling for several years, whether the 
 knowledge of pardon was attainable here. 1 thought, 
 God did forgive men their sins; nut that none could 
 know it for himself. But afterwards 1 was clearly 
 convinced by hearing my brother's experience, and 
 weighing the scriptures tiiat he urged fur it. And 
 I had then a comfortable hope of one day finding it; 
 hut for some years 1 was between hope and fear, 
 when 1 was about nineteen years old. in 1732, by my 
 eldest brother's advice, t went to Mr. Byrne's, at 
 the Ueighn-Hou.se, near ±\<'.'her- Thong. Here I 
 stayed for near four year, divine providence cer-
 
 MR. THOMAS HANSON. 183 
 
 tainly east me here, where I had all the advantages 
 I eould wish for, having two school-masters near at 
 hand. I wrought seven or eight hours a day, with 
 my hook before me. and spent the rest of the day, 
 and part of the night, in learning. This I did dur- 
 ing the whole time I was here. Mr. Hinstiff taught 
 me to write, and east accounts, for above a year; 
 and Mr. Wood, of Nether-Thong, the Latin-master, 
 taught me a little Latin and Greek. 1 got what I 
 eould by heart, in the day, and said it to him at 
 night. Bui as soon as I left this place, i laid these 
 studies aside, and resumed them no more to this 
 day. I have sinee had far better work, and eould 
 not see any need of these for the understanding of 
 the holy scriptures. , 
 
 We had no Methodist preachers here. I did not 
 hear ten sermons, except at church, for near four 
 years. Here I was great I y beloved by those that 
 had any seriousness, and greatly hated b\ those that 
 had none: for, I eould not hold my tongue about re* 
 ligion; my conscience would seldom let me be quiet. 
 1 told i hem, we must kn<t\v our sins fergiven or per- 
 ish forever. And frequently I wept with some of 
 them about it. Several, thereabouts, came to me 
 for advice concerning their souls; though I, poor 
 creature, was ignorant enough, and well nigh lost 
 in my book. 
 
 My conscience, during these years, often arlarm- 
 ed me. But now it would give me no rest for want 
 of Christ and pardon. So I determined, notwith- 
 standing many offered me favors in worldly things, 
 to go home to my mother and brothers. Several 
 wept and entreated me to stay: I told them I cannot 
 sa-e my soul here — I have not the means suitable 
 for it. 
 
 Home I eame, in 1756, with a full resolution to 
 seek Christ till I found him; or die in the seeking 
 of him. Then I sold, or gave away, near'y all my 
 books, and through graee began to be as diligent iu 
 the ways of God as I had been iu study.
 
 •84 EXPERIENCE GE 
 
 I now added fasting to all (he other means of 
 gra«e. Soon after (his, the tempter told rue, "Thou 
 ail good enough." But a Mormon of honest brother 
 Ash, on Gal. ii, 21, and the words of my dear mo- 
 ther, who said, "Though 1 horc you, if you do not 
 come (o Christ, strip! of all, you will never he sav- 
 ed," (ore away my selfrightcousness. God now 
 taught me (o expect Christ and pardon every hour. 
 %\y harden was too great (o he exprest; when God 
 hud. by various means (particularly hy reading (he 
 Bible, and (he extract of Ambrose on the JVerv Birth, 
 on my knees) brought me. for three weeks, to the 
 brink of despair. Just before I found pardon, I was 
 miserable beyond description. 
 
 On July the 16th, at night, 1757, under my bro- 
 ther Joseph's prayer, 1 yielded, sunk, and, as i( were, 
 died away. My heart, with a kind, sweet struggle, 
 melted into (Iip hands of God. I was, for some hours, 
 lost in wonder, by the astonishing peace, love and 
 joy, which flowed into my heart like a mighty tor- 
 rent. When I came to recollect myself, I asked, 
 what hast thou done? It was sweetly, bu( deeply 
 impressed, *»1 have made (bee mine." No tongue 
 can tell what peace, love, joy and ussurauce I then 
 felt. My willing heart and tongue replied, hast 
 thou (bus loved me? Here I am, willing to spend 
 and be spent for (bee. God now gave me to see all 
 creation, redemption, grace and glory in a new light; 
 and every thing led me to lo\4? and praise him. 
 
 From this night I could not hold my tongue from 
 speaking of (be things of God. A few days after 
 my happy conversion, I felt anger at one who per- 
 secuted us. Soon alter my peace left me. Then the 
 tempter said, "lie that is born of God sinneth not. 
 But thou hast sinned: therefore thou art not born of 
 God; lb u bast deceived thyself." 1 was then in a 
 great measure ignorant of his devices: so ga\e up 
 my shield; and was in (be depth of distress, ready to 
 choose strangling for near two hours. It then came 
 to my miud, what if I had deceived myself ? Pardon
 
 MR. THOMAS HANSON. 185 
 
 is free and given in an instant: it is ready for nee- 
 d\. lost sinners, i will go as 1 am, cast myself oa 
 the ground, and on Christ at once. My former, 
 peace, love and joy returned in a moment. "This 
 lore-trial taught me more watchfulness. After this 
 I walked in great love and peace for near two years, 
 buying up every opportunity for prayer, hearing 
 and reaiiing. I read the chief part of the Christian 
 Library, with Mr. Wesley's works, that were then 
 published, and several other books, to my great 
 help, instruction and eomfort. 
 
 Now the same spirit that witnessed my adoption, 
 cried in me, night and day, '-Spend and be spent 
 for God;" yet, never was any one more timorous ; I 
 thought the work so great, and my abilities so 
 small, I cried, I am not n't. I wept and kept it to 
 myself for months. Oh! what a struggle had [ be- 
 tween my unfitness and my love to Gud and souls! 
 Afier this, the Osset people, by earnest entreaties, 
 prevailed on me to pray in public. And it pleased 
 God to make it the means of awakening some sin- 
 ners. Then 1 was persuaded to exhort. — God bless- 
 ed this also, to the conversion of several in the 
 neighboring towns. Now began my warfare with 
 the various sects about us, who came, when 1 had 
 preached at Osset, to dispute with me often till 
 midnight. But 1 was soon heartily weaiy of dis- 
 pute; i'V it caused a decay in my peace and love. 
 
 Mv inbred corruptions now began to perplex me 
 more than ever, and to be a heavy load indeed for 
 gome lime, tin* one day, meeting with a few young 
 men (as I often did) God gave me such a deliver- 
 ance, and su< h a weight of iove as i had not hereto- 
 fore. I seeuieU too happy to live on earth, and 
 thought Go«t was going to take me home. My joy 
 allowed me lit tie *leep for weeks. I told it to none 
 but my brother; and to him only, when 1 could keep 
 it no louger from him. 
 
 Not long after this, a letter came from Mr. Thom- 
 as Olivers, (who afterwards behaved with the ten-
 
 ISO KXPEKIF.NOE OV 
 
 dcrncss and wfsdnm of a father to me) to let me 
 know thai I wa$ appointed b\ the Conference- to 
 travel in tlie then York circuit. T!»i* was done 
 wholly without tm knowledge. No one had spoken 
 to me about it. nor I to any one. I already preach- 
 ed four or five limes a week ahoul home, and loved 
 the people loo well to desire to leave (hem. In my 
 answer to Mr. Oliver-. I said. ••! have no douht of 
 mv (rail to | reach; hut have no desire lo he a travel- 
 ling preacher. I am m>t fil for il. I cannot come." 
 He replied. "If you? father was dead, and your mo- 
 ther lav a dying, von mnsl come and preach (he gos- 
 pel " I wept a fortnight ahoul it. I said lo mv hro- 
 ther, "Go you: you are more h't than 1." He said, 
 "God knows who is il;— he has called you: there- 
 fore go.'' The graeiot s spirit working in me a 
 willingness to s. end and* be spent for God: and my 
 brother persuading me, I wen! in 1760; and through 
 grace have continued unto this day. — In all tiiis 
 time, 1 call the all -seeing God and his people, to 
 bear Witness, that i have sought nothing hut his glo- 
 ry, in n.y own salvation and that of others. 
 
 1 have been in most of the circuits of the king- 
 dom: and I trust, God las heen pleased to use me, 
 and those with me. during these twenty years, to 
 unite thousands to the societies, iiut it is better to 
 leave (his to God and his people* They are our 
 epistle, written by Christ to the rejoicing of our 
 heai s May their conversion he known and read by 
 all i hat know them! 
 
 I have be< n in dangers; by snow-drifts, by land- 
 floods, by falls from m^ horse, and by persecution: 
 I have heen in sickness, cold, pain, weakness and 
 weariness often: in joyful comforts often: in daily 
 love and peace, but not enough: in grief a id heavi- 
 ness through manifold temptations often. I have 
 had abundance of trials, with my heart, with my un- 
 derstanding and judgment; with various reasonings 
 among friends and foes, with men and devils, and 
 most with myself. But in all these, God iu mercy
 
 MR. THOMAS HANSON. 18f 
 
 has hitherto so kept flae, (hat 1 believe none ean with 
 justice lay any single immoral act to my charge, 
 since the day God through Christ forgave* mv sins. 
 
 All my design in preaching has been, and is, to 
 bring sinners to ChinV: and to build up saints in (he 
 most holy faith, hope and love, to a perfect man. 
 
 To this end, the chief in tter of n»y preaching 
 has been the essentials of religion; such as the lost 
 state of man. depraved, guilty, a rid miserable by 
 nature: his justification through the alone merits of 
 Christ by faith only, together with ihe witness and 
 fruits of it, the new birth, the necessity* benefits, 
 and fruits efk, in all inward and outward holiness. 
 1 have endeavored to explain the new covenant m its 
 benefits, conditions, precepts, threats and rewards. 
 1 have shewn that 'perfect love is attainable here, 
 by those t hat press for it with their whole heart. I 
 teach piety to God, justice aud mercy to men, a.sd 
 sobriety in ourselves, endeavoring to keep a con- 
 science void of offence towards G >d and man hi ev- 
 ery station of life, and in all relations. 1 also en- 
 deavor to guard souls against the temptations from 
 the world, the flesh and the devil; against (he hurt- 
 ful opinions that surround them: and against the 
 hinderance of their repentance, faith, hope, love and 
 holiness. 1 have also shewn them the danger of de- 
 la . of refusal, or of drawing back to sin, death and 
 hell. 
 
 Jn the pulpit I have seldom meddled with the de- 
 crees, or the five points of debate. I suffered so 
 much loss by t em before I set out to travel, that I 
 determined not to meddle with them, but when my 
 brethren were in danger of being led aside or hurt 
 by them. So far as J see clear evidence for any of 
 these things. I hold and prove tliem as occasion of- 
 fer s But where I see no sufficient proof of a pro- 
 position, 1 lea>e (he discussion of it to those that 
 are wiser. Bui vet I cannot help thinking, (hat 
 many of these disputes are not much more than a 
 learned playj and if wise men would but play with
 
 J 88 EXPERIENCE OP 
 
 those in good humor, ii would not much grieve one: 
 but when they grow angry, and « all oath oilier l>y 
 vile names, beedGse they differ from them herein, 
 no doubi I he devil has a great hand in ii; he aims to 
 undo. by the non-essentials in religion, the good (hat 
 is done by insisting on the essentials. This has of- 
 ten been a cause of fear and grief to me. Hut hav- 
 ing resolved to take Christ lor my sufficient (eaeher, 
 I am now contented to know what he has revealed, 
 and lo leave the res! to another world. I have, troin 
 my beginning, thought myself the poor man's preach- 
 er; having olhing of politeness in my language, ad- 
 dress, or any thing else. Oh, thai in the day of 
 Christ's judgment I may rejoice, not only in the sin- 
 ceriiy of my labor, but in knowing thai I have not 
 preached, and labored, and suffered, without fruiyj 
 but have been the instrument of gaining souls to, 
 and of keening them with Christ! And oh, that he 
 may present the in to the father, without blame, in 
 perfect love! This is the real desire of 
 
 THOMAS HANSON. 
 
 THE EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 Reverend and dear sir, 
 
 lather removed from Barnard-Castle, in the 
 County of Durham, ro live in the city of Carlisle, 
 where he was employed by a company of gentlemen 
 to carry on a branch of the woollen manufactory. 
 Here he married my mother, who was a prison of 
 some small properly; by whom he had three chil- 
 dren elf being the youngest. I was born De- 
 cember 16, 1733.
 
 MK. THOMAS HANBY. 189 
 
 After some years, the Factory was given up, and 
 my parents fame to live at Barnard-Castle again.— 
 My mother died when I was about seven years of 
 age, and my father soon afler. He was much addict- 
 ed to drunkenness, which made him neglect the care 
 of his family; by which means he reduced his help- 
 less offspring to a variety of afflictions. I lived some 
 time with an aunt, who had been a person of consid- 
 erable Fortune, hut was reduced by thy extravagancy 
 of my uncle, my father's brother. It is true. I was 
 put to school for some years; but made no consider- 
 able progress in learning. Before I was twelve, I 
 was put out to a trade; whereby a kind providence 
 enabled me to provide for myself such things as I 
 stood in need of. 
 
 The first serious impression that I remember, was 
 when I was about six years oF age. I was in a yard 
 belonging to the house where we lived, in Barnard- 
 Castle, and lookiug up to heaven, I was struck with 
 wonder, and called aloud, "God Mmighty!" — But 
 such horror seized me, as made me run home, and 
 shut the door with all speed. My mother reproved 
 me, and said 1 had been doing some mischief; but I 
 assured her I had not. She then insisted upon know- 
 ing the cause of my uncommon haste, and of my 
 shutting the door with such violence. I told her I 
 was in the yard, and called aloud "God Almighty!" 
 and was afraid. What she thought I cannot say; 
 but she said no more to me upon the subject. A few 
 years after, I was greatly alarmed bv m\ sister talk- 
 ing of the day of judgment, which I had not heard 
 of before. But these serious impressions wore off, 
 and 1 began to be, 
 
 "Rough in my manners, and untam'd my mind " 
 
 When I was ab*»nt thirteen, hearing (he bishop 
 was coming to confirm the children in our town, I 
 began to think some kind of reformation and prepa- 
 ration was necessary. Accordingly I applied to a 
 relation, one John Robinson, a Maltster, who was
 
 190 EXPERIENCE or 
 
 a ««»neere man, and esteemed and beloved by all men. 
 He tang' i me ;-U be knew. viz. man} questions and 
 an'-MPis with a great number of prayers; instructed 
 me in the Church eaircbism. (for though I bad learn- 
 ed if when at school. I had now entirely forgotten it) 
 a>d in short, made me, I thought, a \er> good boy. 
 The sabbath came when the bishop was to confirm; 
 and I having passed my examination with the min- 
 ister, was introduced to the bishop. This was in (lie 
 forenoon, and towards evening, 1 went with some of 
 my cnmpanio s into the fields, and played at our 
 usual games; but, before I went to bed, horror of 
 conscience seized me. and I thought 1 heard a voice 
 say, ••Thv continuation is made void, tor thou hast 
 broken the sabbath." What to do now, I knew hot. 
 However, i began to make myself good, by reading 
 and repeating many prayers. 
 
 In this state I continued, till it pleased God of his 
 infinite merey, to send a poor man, one Joseph 
 Cheeleborough, a shoemaker, and a Methodist, from 
 Leeds; who having received the truth himself, was 
 willing to impart it to others: not by preaching or 
 exhortation, but by friendly discourse with his for- 
 mer acquaintance; for he was a Barnard-Castleman. 
 Joseph Garnet, one of our preachers, now with God, 
 and a few others, first received the truth. They met 
 in an upper chamber, for fear of the mob. They read 
 the scriptures, and the books you bad then publ sh- 
 ed, sung hymns and prayed. I went one evening with 
 a few of my ungodly companions, and as they were 
 disposed to mock, I joined with them. However. I 
 found something within that was far from justify- 
 ing my conduct, and a secret persuasion that those 
 despised and persecuted people were able to shew 
 me the way of salvation. I went again the next 
 night, (for they met every night) and begged I 
 might be permitted to come in among them. Ac- 
 cordingly I was admitted, and found mj self sweetly 
 drawn to seek an unknown God. From that time I 
 missed no opportunity of assembling with them. My
 
 MH. THOMAS HANBY. 191 
 
 cousin Robinson went at (he same time; but the min- 
 ister sent for him. and labored to convince dim that 
 he and the Methodists were all in an error, and to 
 prove it. he shewed him several old puritanical hooks 
 which treated on the new birth. &c. aod told him, 
 "It is a false religion, because it is an old religion." 
 My cousin, at that time, and for four years af- 
 ter, was an entire stranger to himself and his 
 need oi'a Saviour: the minister prevailed on him to 
 leave the Methodists; and my great opinion of his 
 piety made me, though contrary to my inclinations, 
 leave them aNo. The minister told my cousin, pro- 
 vided he would form a religious society, upon ration- 
 al principles, he would sometimes come himself. 
 He accordingly did, and in a little time we had a 
 larger society than the Methodists, of formal pro- 
 fessors, who could play at cards, take their plea- 
 sures, and conform to the world in almost every 
 thing. During this period, God still worked upon 
 mv lender mind, aid I was fervent in prayer read- 
 in^, a.d every other exercise of religions duty. I 
 was sometimes much tempted, but knew not that it 
 was temptation. I also found remarkable comforts, 
 bui kiew not what they meant. I thought 1 would 
 prav at the same place again; which J did, and was 
 greatly surprized not to iwet with ihe same joy. la 
 this state of ignorance 1 continued till our society 
 dwindled away, and none remained but my cousin 
 and L 1 said to him one night, I (ear we are 
 wrong in leaving the Methodists; we can meet with 
 none who can shew us the way of salvation like 
 them; come and let us go and join them again, lie 
 had some objections, but my importunity prevailed 
 with him. Accordingly we went, and it being their 
 clas 3 meeting, we were admitted. In about twelve 
 mouths he found peace, and ever after continued in 
 the way, a very serious, steady, and circumspect 
 walker, tili the Lord took him to himself. About 
 this time Mr. Whitlbi'd, ihe iirst Methodist preach- 
 er, came to iiaruard-Castie. He preached abroad
 
 192 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 to a very large but unruly congregation. I was 
 mil cli affected, especially when he repeated these 
 words. <*Oh. let not Christ's precious blood be shed 
 in vain." [Mr. Whitford left the Methodists some 
 years after, and turned Calviuist, and 1 suppose 
 would now be shocked to use the words which hud 
 such an effect upon my mind, that I never could for- 
 get them.] — Afier Mr. Whitford^ we were favored 
 with Mr. Tucker, Mr. Turnough, Mr. John Fen- 
 wick, Mr. Rowel, and others; who often preached 
 to us while the blood ran down their faces, by the 
 bl<>\vs and pointed arrows thrown at them, while 
 the.v were preaching. Soon after you. sir, paid us a 
 visit, but were interrupted by the fire engine being 
 plaved on the audience. I, and our few friends, did 
 all we could to prevent it, but were overpowered by 
 the multitude. 
 
 God continued to draw me with strong desires, 
 and 1 spent much time, praying in (he fields, woods, 
 and barns. Any place, ami every place, was now a 
 closet to my mourning soul, who longed for the day 
 star to arise in mv poor beni hted heart. And it 
 pleased infinite mercy, while I was pral isg in a dark 
 place, (greatly terrified for fear 1 should see the de- 
 vil.) to set my weary soul at liberty. The next day 
 the Lord was pleased to withdraw the extacy of joy, 
 though I had no condemnation, and 1 had well nigh 
 given u,* my confidence, thinking it was nothing but 
 a heated in agination. But the Lord met me again, 
 while I was in the fields, mv usual place of retire- 
 ment, and from that time I was enabled to keep a 
 weak bold of the precious Lord Jesus. 
 
 When I was about eighteen. I had a desire to see 
 New cast le-upon-Tvnc: thinking, if I was among 
 mote experienced Christians, 1 might be taught the 
 ways of ihe Lord more perfectly. I stayed a few 
 montos there, a*d boarded with our worthy friend, 
 Mr. Robert Can-, whose tenderness for my youth, 
 and trulv Christian behaviour, was of singular use 
 to ate: for which I shall ever love and esteem him—
 
 MR. THOMAS HANBY. 193 
 
 By attending preaching, night and morning, and 
 conversing with man) mature Christians, my under- 
 standing whs much enlightened: and I think I may 
 say, through all sufficient mercy, that 1 grew in the 
 fear and knowledge of God. 
 
 When I returned to Barnard Cattle, I stayed some 
 time there, and told my beloved friends all I could 
 remember of the many excellent sermons I had heard 
 in Newcastle, the nature of their discipline, and the 
 Christian spirit of the society in that place. 
 
 Having profited so much by my Newcastle jour- 
 ney, I thought I would take one more journey to 
 Leeds, and alter that, meant to settle at home for 
 life. Accordingly 1 went, and here providence was 
 equally kind, in casting my lot in Mr. Richard Wat- 
 kin son's fa-rnilv: where they :>ul themselves to some 
 inconvenience in hoarding and accommodating me 
 With a vi>i'\ agreenhle lodging-. I have often had a 
 tha.ikful remembrance of their kind .ess to me, and 
 1 hope ihe Lord will rewar them for it. 
 
 My business now, was that of stuff Miking, and as 
 I lived to labour hard, I was able to procure more 
 than my necessities required. My method was, as 
 formerly to be much in the fields, praying and ue- 
 ditating. 1 also attended all the means of grace, 
 and on the Sabbath 1 frequently took a walk with 
 Mr. Watkihson into the country, where he preached. 
 During th.s period, I can trul\ say, i walked in 
 the fear of the Lord, and in the comforts of the Ho- 
 ly Ghost; and mj delight was in tlte taw of the Lord, 
 and in his law I meditated day and night. 
 
 About tins time, a sudden impression was made 
 upon my mind, that i ought to pie. urn the gospel. I 
 concluded it was nothing hut a temptation, and wou.d 
 not foi a moment encourage such a thought. But 
 it came again, and wMi it »-a horror of great dark- 
 ness fell Ujjon me," like that mentioned in Gen. xv. 
 12, and I was truly mise able. I remembered the 
 wormwood and the g.vll that the preachers drank at 
 Barnard-Castle; and 1 said in my heart, 1 will not 
 17
 
 194 BXPENIENCE OP 
 
 preach. • But the terrors of the Lord made me 
 afraid, and his fear took hold upon me. I wan in 
 great bitterness of spirit because of this convictjon. 
 Sometimes I thought if was from God, at other 
 times I thought it was all from the devil. In this 
 perplexed situation I continued sometime, without 
 ever mentioning my ease to anv one. I would fre- 
 quently retire into ray closet, and express myself in 
 words like these: "Lord! of what use is mj existence 
 in this world? I am profitable neither to God nor 
 man I cannot preach, for I am a fool, ami a child. 
 Oh let me die, for it is betir for me to die than to 
 Eve." 
 
 However. I was willing to preach, provided T was 
 sure it was the will of God cone ruing me. But 
 
 "This way, and that, I turned my anxious mind" 
 "When a friend of mine, one .John Smith, told me of 
 a poor woman in the society who was supposed to he 
 dying and that she was wonderfully happy. J had 
 read in your Tracts the accounts of many happy 
 deaths, hut had never seen one. I desired my friend, 
 if he i ould. to introduce me to see her. He promis- 
 ed to • all on me the next night, lie did so, and as 
 we were goiug, I prayed to the Lord that he would 
 remove my intolerable load, and that if it was his 
 will 1 should preach, he wou d shew it to the dying 
 saint I was going to visit. I said, "Lord thou canst 
 as easily do this, as thou canst cause her to triumph 
 over death, if thou wilt but shew me a token by 
 which 1 may know thy will, then I will preach thy 
 word wherever thou shalt ; lease to send me." 
 
 We came to the house where the sick woman lay, 
 and as I was an entire stranger to her, and every 
 body besides, 1 stood at a distance. Mr. Sheut came 
 in and prayed with her; 1 followed him to tell him 
 our Barnard-Castle brethren would be glad fa visit 
 from him. After 1 bad de.ivered my message, 1 re- 
 turned to the siek woman, and was told, she bad 
 made much enquiry lor the young man who stood in 
 the corner. 1 came to the bedside, and she looked
 
 MR. THOMAS HANBY. 
 
 195 
 
 me earnestly in the face, and said, "God has called 
 you to preach the gospel; you have long rejected the 
 call; but lie will make you go; obey the call, obey 
 the call." She put such an emphasis upon "he will 
 make you go," (hat it shocked me exceedingly. 
 
 I now resolved through the grace of God, to make 
 a trial. Accordingly 1 sent word to Brantley, that 
 preaching would he I here the next Lord's day in the 
 morning. As 1 went along, my mind was perfectly 
 resigned. I did n t ttiink about what I should say, 
 but my heart said, "If he will have me to preach, 
 something will he given me to sa> (hat will be pro- 
 fitable: and if he has not sent me, it will be a less 
 cross to be confounded before the people, than to be 
 a preacher of (he gospel." 
 
 1 was rather behind the time, and the people were 
 waiting, expecting brother Waikmson, as usual.— 
 The} came to me. and asked where he was, and what 
 must be done? 1 said in my heart, "The Lord will 
 provide himself a sacrifice." I stepped to the place* 
 gave out a hymn, prayed, and took these words lor 
 my text, *?lf ye be risen with Christ. seek those 
 things whicb are above." The people trembled for 
 fear of me, and prayed heartily; God was pleased 
 to visit us; two persons received a sense of pardon. 
 I preached again at noon, and at Armley in the eve- 
 ning. This, dear sir, was my beginning, and what 
 I looked upon as my call from God. 
 
 i was now occasionally employed by Mr. She tit, 
 and the other preachers, to take part of a circuit for 
 them. 
 
 In 175i, brother Mitchel desired me to come and 
 help them in the Staffordshire circuit for a lew 
 months. Accordingly I went to Birmingham, W'ed- 
 nesbury, &e. Brother Crab was then along with 
 us, and as we were loo many for the few places about 
 Birmingham, 1 made an excursion into the wilds of 
 Derbyshire; preached at Wootton, near Weaver- 
 hill, the Ford, Snehwn, and Ashburn, where there 
 had been no such a being as a Methodist preacher.
 
 3% 
 
 EKPEUIKNCR OF 
 
 I had often found a great desire to preach in that 
 town. Imi was at n loss low lo introduce mv«elf.-— 
 However* I providentially heard of a -»eiM<».c» man, 
 "Mr Thomas Thomson, who kept the toll-gate, about 
 ball' a mile from the town. I lock Thomas White 
 with me, from Barton-Forge; we came to Mr. 
 Thomson's, and introdueed ourselves fn the best man- 
 ner wo could. He informed afew,of his neighbours, 
 that there was a*pro;uher at Lis- house. Accord mg- 
 ly. Mr. Hurd's family. Mr. Peach's, and a few 
 others, came in the evening* I suppose as many as 
 they dur*t invite. 1 talked to (hem ard expounded 
 a part of the eighth chapter of the Romans. I 
 found much liberty in my own soul, and the power 
 of God rest©! upon the people, who were deeply af- 
 fected, 1 stayed a few days, ; read ing morning and 
 evening, to as many as the house would hold. Miss 
 Beresfurd condescended to assemble with us, and 
 the Lord opened her heart, as the heart of Lvdia. 
 "When I had been preaching Christ as a fountain 
 ©pen for sin and une leanness, she cried out, "Oh! 
 precious gospel! Oh! precious gospel!" From that 
 time she continued stedtasr, growing in grace, till 
 the Lord took her in glorious triumph to himself. 
 
 1 left Ashburn for about a fortnight, to visit my 
 new friends in Snelson, Wootlon, the Ford, Bottom- 
 House, See.. and returned again. I now found I must 
 preach no more at the toll-gate house, the commis- 
 sioners of the road had forbid my friend Mr. Thomp- 
 son, to admit me. But Mr. Hurd, a gentleman farm- 
 er, by the desire of his family, whose hearts the Lord 
 Lad touched, suffered me to preach at his house, It 
 •was now that a furious mob arose while I was preach- 
 ing, & beset the house, & sprang in among us like so 
 many lions, i soon perceived that I was the object 
 of their rage. My mind was variously agitated; yet 
 I durst not but cry aloud, as long as 1 could be heard, 
 but at. last I was overpowered with noise. Some of 
 my friends, in defending me, were bleeding among 
 the mob, and, with difficulty, I escaped out of their
 
 MR. THOMAS HANBT- 197 
 
 hands. But as Mr. Thompson, Mr. Isaac Peach 
 Mr. Hind's family, Miss Beresford. and a few others 
 remained steady, f was constrained to repeat my 
 visits, till the Lord gave us peace. Mr. Thompson 
 grew in the knowledge and love of God, till the 
 Lord took him to himself. 
 
 In a few weeks, I returned again to Leek, and 
 put up at one of the principal inns, in hopes of see- 
 ing some of the society, to encourage them to suffer 
 patiently fop the sake of him who suffered death for 
 them 1 had ordered dinner; h ;t hefore it was rea- 
 dy, the mob collected together in a large hody, and. 
 beset the inn. The landlord came to me in great 
 Confusion, and entreated me to leave the place im- 
 mediately, or his house would he pulled down, and 
 I should be murdered. I was obliged to obey; I 
 mounted my horse in the yard, and rode through the 
 mob, amidst stones, dirt, 6te. whilst they were gath- 
 ering in vast numbers from every part of the town, 
 crying, "Kill him. kill him!" There was, from this 
 time, no access to Leek, till the chief men of this 
 mob died miserably; and of the rest, some went for 
 soldiers, and all of them were dispersed, except one 
 man, who was alive a few months ago, in miserable 
 circumstances. 
 
 1 had frequently passed through Burton-upon- 
 Trent. in mv way to Ashby-de-la Z.»ueii; an , found 
 a desire to preach in thai place, which appeared lo 
 me, to be fit for him who came not tocali the righte- 
 ous, but sinners, to repentance. I obtained leave to 
 preach in a large house, belonging lo a shoemaker. 
 Many attended, and J had reason lo believe some 
 were awakened. 1 gave out preaching lor another 
 day, and went accordingly. The town was alarmed, 
 and a mob, (as i understood afterwards) were hired 
 and made urunk, by the principal persons in the 
 town, effectually to prevent my preaching It was 
 in lae winter season, and a dark night. Ail was qui- 
 et till I gave out d hymn, tnen they a <pr >ached the 
 house, broke first the window shutters, aud luen 
 17 *
 
 198 EXPERIKKCE OP 
 
 dashed the windows in. The head of this mob was 
 a forge man, half an ideot, who had hound himself 
 under an oath, he would, that nii^ht. have my liver. 
 He brought the pipe of a large bellows, with which 
 he made a frightful noise, and which was to he the 
 instrument of my death. He made what wa; he 
 could towards me, btrt was rather retarded by the mul- 
 titude that was before him. I observed him with the 
 fury of a fiend; hut knew not well what to do. To 
 attempt to preach was in vain, f r 1 could not he 
 heard. I stepped off the chair, and got into a cham- 
 ber u n perceived hy my enemy. \\ hen he found I 
 was gone, he insisted upon going mo stairs, and it 
 was impossible to hinder him, and the numbers that 
 were with him. It came into my mind, ''Go down 
 stairs — escape for thy ii:"e!" I went down a id walk- 
 ed i'.fto the shoemaker's shoo, unobserved by any 
 one, though I parsed through part of the mob. Soon 
 after he gut up stairs, searched the closets, beds, 
 chests, Ate. and when he could not find me, foamed 
 at the mouth like a mad dog. Then there was a 
 cry in the street, "He's in the shop! he's In the shop!" 
 I now concluded all was over with me. and said, 
 «»Lord, give me strength to suffer as a Christian; nor 
 ma^ I count my life dear unto hiyselffor ihy sake." 
 I went under the shoemaker's cutting-hoard; mean- 
 time the mob were long in breaking open two strong 
 doors* that led into the shop. They did not see me; 
 but one of them put down his hand where I was, and 
 cried out, "He's here! — he's here!" I had now no 
 other means to use; so I committed myself into their 
 hands. 
 
 They hurried me into the house, and a very stout 
 man, out of those who had been made drunk for the 
 purpose, approached me; but his countenance fell; 
 he took hold of mv hand, aftd said. "Follow me." I 
 imagined he intended to take me and throw me into 
 the river, and I was content. J commit ted myself to 
 the disposal of a kind providence, expecting nothing 
 but death. With difficulty he got me through the
 
 M«. THOMAS HANBT. 199 
 
 mob: and as lie was one of (he best boxers in the 
 town, nobody durst oppose him. When we came lo 
 the door, he drew me short by the corner up a nar- 
 row street, put me before him, and said. "Run." I 
 made my way to the fields, & h<> kept behind, keep- 
 ing the rest off. then helping me over walls and 
 hedges, till Ave had !ost them ail. I remained in the 
 iields till midnight, and returned wish a friend into 
 town, and lodged till early in (he morning, when I 
 rode away. 
 
 After some time I went again to T.eck. stayed ten 
 days, and joined twenty-four in a society, \iawyer 
 then raised a furious mob. who beset (he house 
 where I lodged. My few friends kept them off* for 
 a considerable time. But at last they lost all pa- 
 tience; they broke in, and were determined to drag 
 me away; but it pleased the Lord that a woman, who 
 then neither feared God nor regarded mart, opened 
 a window that looked into (he yard, and desired me 
 to come into her house. Here* I slaved (ill about 
 two o'clock in the morning, and then made m\ es- 
 cape over the mouniains to the Bo! torn -House. This 
 woman is yet alive; but she is a new woman, and in 
 our society. The next day (he mob were not a little 
 chagrined tj find they had lost (heir prey; and had 
 no other way to avenge themselves, than to burn 
 me in effigy. 
 
 Soon after 1 was pressed in spirit to visit Burfon- 
 npon-Treut once more. The mob soon gathered; 
 and had it not been for a peculiar providence, in 
 turning one of (he head of (hem on my side, 1 be- 
 lieve 1 should have had (hat night the honor of mar- 
 tyrdom. 
 
 in weariness and painfulnes . in hunger and thirst, 
 in joy and sorrow, in weakness and trembling, were 
 m. ♦ days now spent. And I have frequent thought 
 if God would excuse me from (his hard task, h-w 
 gladly should j embrace the life of a sh.»e- black, or 
 of a shepherd's bov. 1 was surrounded with death, 
 fciAiicuuid seldom expect to survive another day, be-
 
 20ft EXPERIENCE 0» 
 
 cause of (he fury of the people. And yfct U was, 
 <*V\oe unto thee, if thou preach riot lire gospel," 
 
 The dimmer following, 1755, the conference was 
 he''' at Leeds, where I was admitted as a travelling 
 preaeher. The next year I Mas sent to Canterbury. 
 JI< little stock of monev was nearlv exhausted hv 
 the time 1 got to London: and. though it was rather 
 too long a journey fop a winter's day, I was under 
 a necessity to push forward. not having money enough 
 to keep me and my horse upon the road all night. 
 Tt was ahoul eight o'clock at night when I got with- 
 in sight of the lamps in the city. Two men, with 
 large pistols, then rushed out upon me from a nar- 
 row lane, and demanded mv money. They took my 
 watch, and all the money I had in the world, which 
 was two shillings ami eight pence. (Indeed, some- 
 times, if a halfpenny would have purchased the three 
 kingdoms, 1 had it not for weeks to- ether.) I be- 
 lieve this robbery was permitted for good It was 
 at the time we expected an invasion from France, 
 and the city of Canterbury was full of soldiers. They 
 were two soldiers who rohhed me. and (his excited 
 a curiosity in their comrades to heat- the preacher 
 who had been rohhed: anil it pleased God to con- 
 vince many of them. Ahoul (en were in society he- 
 fore this; and when 1 came away they were increas- 
 ed to sixty . 
 
 Several of the Following years I spent in Scotland; 
 and I ihi k, this was in ge ;eca , the happiest period 
 of m\ life. In t7o3. brother Roberts and I. came 
 to Dundee: I preached in the evening, and he the 
 next morning, when we parted. 1 came to Kdin- 
 b««rg. and he wen! to Aberdeen- Some time after, 
 I had a str-mg desire to give Dundee a fair trial. — 
 Accordingly I vveni there, and stayed three or four 
 mouths. 1 continued preaching in the open air till 
 the tenth of Sove tuber. And it was there God met 
 with many poor sinners, and truly awaKened them to 
 a sense of their misery: so that, before' 1 left the 
 place, there were near an hundred joined in our »««
 
 "SB 
 ftiH. THOMAS HANBY. 201 
 
 eiety. About this ri >«e \h; Krskine polished Mi 1 . 
 HerveV's Letters, wfth a preface equal'y Indei*. Ob. 
 the precious convictions those Lefters destroyed! 
 They made me mourn in secret places^. Vfr. «-!;Ijc 
 beingpmuch esteemed i*i the religious world, and 
 recommendim* theiri throi/adi the whole king-doni. 
 our enemies «u.:<le their* advantage ol them. These 
 made (he late lady Gardiner leave us. after expres- 
 sing a thousand times, in my hearing, the great :>ro- 
 fit site received by hearing onr preaching. Many 
 were then hi ought to the hirth; but by those Letters 
 their convictions were stifled. What a pil.\. good 
 Maeri should help to destroy the real work of God ia 
 the hearts of men! 
 
 In 1765. I was appointed to labor in the Leeds 
 eireuit. Here the Lord was pleased to try m , bv the 
 death of a most aiuiaMe wife and my only e.hiJd. 
 Oh how great a debtor to that grace whieh forbids 
 our murmuring at the dispensations of providence, 
 though it allows us to sorrow,- but not as men with- 
 out hope. 
 
 In 1766, I labored in the Bristol eireuit; in 1767, 
 in Staffordshire; in 1768, in Bedfordshire; in 1769 
 and 1770, in Newcastle: in 1771, in hdinburg and 
 Glasgow. From hence I made a short visit to my 
 old friends at f>undee: arid, notwithstanding the ma- 
 ny difficulties they had to encounter, I found many 
 of them serious and steady. In 1772 awl 1773, I 
 labored in Staffordshire again. In 1774? and 1775, 
 in Gloucestershire; in 1776 and 1777, in Maccles- 
 field. There the Lord was pleased again to afflict 
 me in a very tender part, by making a second breach 
 in my family. 
 
 "Our lives are ever in the power of death." 
 
 In 1778, 1 was appointed for Liverpool. I am now 
 going on in my second year, among a loving, kind, 
 good people for whom 1 feel the greatest affection, 
 and hope my weak labors are acceptable. 
 
 Thus, dear sir, I have given you a short account
 
 202 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 of my life, but fain I would do something for him, 
 who has loved me and given himself fop me. My 
 sentiments in religion are the same they ever were. 
 1 believe man by nature is sinful and helples*. That 
 his onlv remedy is in Jesus Christ, who tasted drain 
 for every man. That the Holy Spirit works con- 
 version in the soul, and a fitness for the kingdom »»f 
 heaven, by transforming it into the image of the 
 ever blessed God. This conformity 1 must ardent- 
 ly long for; and hope, dear sir. you will intreal the 
 Father of mercies, for your alFectionate son and ser- 
 vant in the gospel, 
 
 THOMAS 1IAKBY. 
 
 £ir<-rp0oI,.JV(OTJ.12, 1779. 
 
 THE EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 sis* vawit&a &xb% 
 
 I WAS horn in May, 1717. at a small village in 
 the parish of Kighlcy. Yorkshire. When 1 was 
 four years old my mother died, and I was removed 
 to her brother's, at Long Addiogbam. Here I was 
 carefully restrained from outward sin, yet 1 often 
 fell an inclination to it, particularly to swear, which 
 one day I did: but blessed be God, he struck me with 
 so deep a conviction, that I never swore again from 
 that day, nor had the least inclination to it. About 
 fourteen, I was bound apprentice to one of the worst- 
 ed trade, and was. by a kind providence, placed in a 
 family where I wanted nothing that was needful ei- 
 ther for body or soul. 
 
 From my early days, the Lord was at times pow- 
 erfully working upon my soul. From ten to eleven
 
 MR. THOMAS LEE. 203 
 
 years of age, T was* exceedingly distressed. I gene- 
 rail;- saw, »9 I thought, bell before me. and believed 
 it was (o be mv portion. T.'te words everlastins;. a id 
 eternity, were much upon my mini!, insomuch that 
 my life became a burden to me. For on the one 
 hand, bell appeared intolerable, and on the other I 
 found no delight in the -erviee of* God, so Jiiaf iny 
 days were consumed in trouble. Frequently did I 
 murmur against God, and often wished to be anni- 
 hilated. 
 
 In this state T continued till I was fourteen, though 
 with some intervals. I was then a litile more at 
 ease, and followed what are called recreations. But 
 from fifteen I was more inclined to reading, and for 
 some time spent all m\ vacant hours in reading tne 
 scriptures, and took much pleasure therein. Be- 
 tween sixteen and seventeen. I f >u d much delight 
 in nrayer.and bad many inward consolations, though 
 I had never then heard any one speak of the comforts 
 oft'ie ?loly Ghost. Bit having mine to speak to 
 about these things, they gradually died away. From 
 seventeen to nineteen was the most careless part of 
 m> life. I now sought pleasure in mirth and com- 
 pany: but the Lord general^ disappointed me, and 
 made it bitter to my soul. 1 could not ft. id any com- 
 panions to my mind. I sought mirth, but 1 thought 
 me) carried it to excess. And I could not near their 
 taking the name of Go \ in vain. Hence I bad much 
 sorrow at times: likewise the looking back, and see- 
 ing what seriousness 1 had fallen from, cut uie to 
 the heart. 
 
 During this time I now and then heard that bless- 
 ed man, Mr Griinshaw, and made good resolutions; 
 bu> ihev lasied not lorn*. Meanwhile 1 ha I heard 
 of a people called Methodists, bui I was liitle con- 
 cerned about them, titi 1 heard some of them preach. 
 I liked them well, a id heard them more and m. re 
 frequently. A id though I was not deeply affiled 
 .un er anj particular sermon, yet my conscience was 
 gradually enlightened by hearing and leaning, and
 
 £04 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 conversing and praying. tiM I resolved to cast in my 
 Id among litem From << -a« ( i i » > e n.v hearl was so 
 united to them, that ail at once 1 d *pned all m> for- 
 mer companions. And bi.essed be God, from that 
 hour I have never Kad one desire to turn back* 
 
 I now loved Hie bible more than ever, particularly 
 tin- New Testament. Tins was my daily compan- 
 ion, and in reading and meditating therein, I found 
 great delight. And hereby I was delivered from a 
 temptation to think, "'Huso are the faise prophets 
 we are hid to beware of." Thi* vanished away, when 
 I compared their doctrines and practice wilh my bi- 
 ble. And mj judgment was more fully and clearly 
 informed, of all the essential doctrines of Christia- 
 nity. And in the use of these means, God frequent- 
 ly met me and com tori ed my so. 'I. Indeed the doc- 
 trine of salvation l>y grace was unspeakably com- 
 fortable to me. Vel shortly after, ! sunk almost all 
 at once Into a desponding suite, which continued 
 more than a year. And though during this time I 
 was often comforted,, berth under the word and in 
 prater, yet I do not remember, as-dug four and twen- 
 ty hours together, without being some part of the 
 time i'i despair. c 
 
 In this period I was continually tempted to think 
 nnseif a h.vpoerte. Once I mentioned this Co a 
 friend, but got no Comfort at all, which shut my 
 mouth for a lone time It is imp ssible to express 
 the anguish 1 lejt. 1 longed for death, though I 
 knew l v>as not lit for it. Hut in the midst of all, I 
 constantly heard the preaching at all opportm it es, 
 and never omitted prav cr- When 1 could sav noth- 
 ing, I groaned before God: resolving, if I perished, 
 (a* 1 expected in do) it should be in the means of 
 
 grace. 
 
 Vet e\en in this period, the Lord did not leave me. 
 j^j, t vvas'one oight on inyv knees groaning beforo 
 b'?m» these wonts wt ;e powerfully applied to my 
 som ! . thou shaii bear im name i ef re much people; 
 And this imi>ressiou never after left my mind loDg
 
 mb. amauAS lee. -295 
 
 together, which of(«»n constrained me to hope that; 
 the Lord would some lime help sue. Also during 
 all liiis lime. I had favour with my master and mis- 
 iress. and ail (he family; although they did pot much 
 like the people to whom I belonged^ Toward (he 
 end of this gloomy season, one eveniog, when sit- 
 ting in ihe house, I look courage, rose ui>. and de- 
 sired we might have family praver. J kneeled down 
 (and so did all tSie fa mily,) and prayed with great 
 freedom. And I continued il. though only an ap- 
 prentice, which proved a great, blessing to my own 
 soul. For il kept ni« v watchful ail the day long, lest 
 my prayer and my life >houid contradict each olher. 
 
 Soon after \ was desired lo pray in another fami- 
 ly, which L did several times. 1 had now more hope; 
 and one day being alone great part of the day, and 
 much engaged in meditation and prayer. I found a 
 persuasion, that God was willing to receive me. I 
 left my business immediately and wen! to prayer. — 
 In a moment God hroke in upon my sou!, in so won- 
 derful a manner, tiiat I could no longer doubt of his 
 forgiving love. I cried, **.Vly Lord and my God!'* 
 And in the spirit I was then in. 1 could have praised, 
 and loved, and waited to ail eternity. 
 
 Before this. 1 had attended several meetings for 
 prayer. I was now unawares brought to conduct 
 those meeting*, and somtimes to speak a few words 
 in his flame whom I loved. When the meetings 
 were over, others asked me to come to (heir houses, 
 which 1 promised to do. IBut when I came home I 
 feared I had gone too far, and resolved (o make no 
 more such promises. One night as f was troinir to 
 a neighbor's house, one ot my master's daughters, 
 who was going with me, said, *f My father and mo- 
 ther are not pleased with your proceedings," I ask- 
 ed «» Why, what have I done?" she said, " They 
 would not have you go to such houses. But if you 
 think it is your duty to keep meetings in the neigh- 
 borhoo i, ihe\ would have you keep them at liome."- 
 
 That ui^ht my soul was greatly comforted, and f 
 IS
 
 206 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 gave notice of speaking at home on sabbath evening. 
 "We had ahundanee of people, and neither my mas- 
 ter nor mistress seemed to be at all displeased. 
 They loved me dearly, and let me go wherever I 
 would. But in the midst of all these outward bles- 
 sings, 1 had many inward trials. Sometimes I doubted 
 of my state; sometimes 1 feared I had run before I was 
 sent, and many times said, with Jeremiah, "I will 
 speak no more in this name." And thus I continu- 
 ed for several mouths, though many were blessed 
 and comforted in hearing me. Frequently I eon- 
 suited my dear friend, Mr. Grimshaw, who strong- 
 ly exhorted me, "not to he faint or weary, but to go 
 on valiantly in the work, to which God had called 
 me." 
 
 About this time I was invited to go to Harding- 
 Moor, Lingobin near Wilsdon, and Thornton above 
 Bradforth. As these were places where no one had 
 preached yet, I thought if God would ewn me here, 
 and raise up a people for himself, 1 shall know that 
 he hath sent tne. He did so: many found peace with 
 God, and a society was raised at each place. After 
 delivering these up to the travelling preachers, I 
 went to JLong-Addingham. There also God was 
 pleased to set to his seal. A society was quickly 
 raised; many sinners were convinced, and several of 
 them truly converted to God. 
 
 During all this time, I wrought exceeding hard at 
 my own business when I was at home; but the going 
 up and down to preach, frequently took up more 
 than half my time. After a while providence called 
 me toGreenough Hill, to Hartwith, and some other 
 places; at each of which it pleased God to raise up 
 a people for himself. After I had preached some 
 time at Greenough Hill, I was invited to Pateley- 
 Bridge. Here l was called to an exercise of my 
 faith, which I had not hitherto known. The first 
 
 time I was there, Mr. had prepared and 
 
 encouraged a numerous mob, who spared neither 
 j»ttd nor stones, with many strokes besides, so that
 
 MR. THOMAS LEE. 207 
 
 they themselves owned, "We have done enough to 
 make an end of him." I did indeed, reel to and fro 
 and my head was hroke with a stone. But I never 
 found my soul more happy, nor was ever more com- 
 posed in my closet. It was a glorious time; and 
 there are several who date their conversion from that 
 day. After I was a little cleaned I went to a neigh- 
 boring town, where, when my head was dressed, I 
 preached abroad to abundance of people, many of 
 whom had followed me from Pateley-Bridge. Some 
 of the mob also followed, but as the wretched rain * 
 ter was not present to ■ hesld them, and as they were 
 greatly out-numbered, they behaved peaceably. And 
 the Lord blessed us much. 
 
 Having now labored near four years, and travelled 
 generally on foot; having been often thoroughly wet, 
 and obliged to keep on my wet clothes all day; and, 
 having frequently, when at home, worked at night, 
 that 1 might not be burdensome to any: I found, I 
 was not so strong as formerly. And the number of 
 places still increasing, I was obliged, though much 
 against my will, to give up my business and buy a 
 horse. Mr. Grimshaw now sent me into his circuit 
 for a mouth, sending another preacher in my place. 
 Then 1 returned and spent a considerable time toge- 
 ther amoog the new societies. 
 
 In the year 17.5 i, and during the winter following, 
 the work of God prospered exceedingly; but perse- 
 cution raged oo every side. The malice of (he devil 
 was chieliy levelled against me, as I was the first 
 that disturbed his servants in these parts. So that 
 wherever I wen! I was in much danger, carrying as 
 it were, my life in my hand. One day as 1 was going 
 through Pateley, the captain of (he mob, who was 
 kept in constant pay, pursued me and pulled me off 
 my horse. The mob then soon collected about me; 
 and one or other struck up my heels, (I believe more 
 than twenty (imes) upon the stones. They then 
 ^ .dragged me into a house by the hair of the head; 
 tben pushed me back, with one or two upon me. and
 
 it)8 BXFE«XfcN«fc *>> 
 
 threw me with the small of my hack upon the edg* 
 «f the stone stairs. This nearly broke my back; 
 and it was not well for many 3 ears after. Theme 
 they dragged me down to the common sewer, which 
 earries Use dirt from the town to the river. They 
 lolled me in it for some time; then dragged me to 
 the bridge and threw me into the water. They had 
 me mostly on the ground, my strength being quite 
 spent. 
 
 3»1y wife, with some friends, now came np. See- 
 ing her busy about me, some asked, "WftatVare-yrVaf 
 a Methodist ? ? " gave her several blows, which made 
 her bleed at the mouth, and swore, they would put 
 her into the river. All this time I lay upon the 
 ground, the mob being undetermined what to do: 
 some cried out, "Make an end of him!" Others were 
 for sparing my life: but the dispute was cut short, 
 by their agreeing to put some others into the water. 
 So they took them away, leaving hie and my wife 
 together — she endeavored to raise me up; but having 
 no strength, I dropped down to the ground again; 
 »he got me up again, and supported me about an 
 hundred yards; then 1 was set on horse-back, and 
 made a shift to ride softly, as far as Michael Gran- 
 ger's house: here I was Stripped from head to foot, 
 and was washed. I left my wet clothes here, and 
 rode to Greetiough -Hill, where many were waiting 
 for me; and, though much bruised ami weak, preach- 
 ed a short sermon, from Psalm xxxiv, 19: ••Many 
 are the troubles of the righteous; but the Lord de- 
 livereth him out of them an." 
 
 The next morning I preached again; afterwards 
 several accompanied use a bye- way to North Pas- 
 ture. There were many serious hearers; but the 
 captain of the mob came and made some disturb- 
 ance; and then with a great stick, broke every pane 
 of glass in a large window. This made a tittle con- 
 fusion at first; but afterwards the Lord poured down 
 his blessing in an uncommon manner: Almost ail 
 were in tears, and the people took jo^ fully the spoii-
 
 MR. THOMAS L£t» $0$ 
 
 ing of their goods. Thence we rode to Hartw ith, 
 where we had peace, and the power of the Lord was 
 with us. But when the work of the day was over, 
 <J was so bruised and sore, that I was obliged to he 
 undressed hy another. 
 
 This summer, autumn and winter, were times of 
 hot persecution. Our friends frequently suffered, 
 when they went upon business, to Pateley- Bridge. 
 Their clothes were spoiled, and their persons much 
 abused. They applied for justice to the Dean of 
 Rippon, but found none. But what made amends 
 was, we loved each other dearly, and had exceeding 
 comfortable seasons together. In January I was in- 
 vited to preach about a mile from Pateley. When 
 1 came the mob was gathered. However, ivi the 
 name of the Lord I began; and, though they blas- 
 phemed horribly, and broke the windows, I was not 
 interrupted or discomposed, but prayed, preached 
 and concluded in peace. As soon as I had ended, 
 they became outrageous. I retired into a chamber, 
 and gave myself to prayer: while I was on my knees, 
 one came and informed me, the mob had forced into 
 the house, and would quickly be in the chamber. 
 But that I must get out at the window, and there 
 were some friends below, who would catch me as I> 
 fell. I did so, and went where I had left my marc. 
 Thus the Lord delivered me this time also. 
 
 In a while, being desired to preach there again. I 
 fixed it in the day litue, thinking the mob would not 
 leave their work to disturb us. But they soon ca ue 
 and surrounded the house, so that I could not preach 
 at all. After 1 had been kept prisoner for several 
 hours, I was obliged »o run for my life. About the 
 same time I was invited to Garthit-Hall, where 1? 
 p cached in the open air with 1 ii tie interruption: but 
 wh< n 1 came aga n, the Pateley mob came, though 
 the floods were out. When I began to preach, (hey 
 were more and more violent, till 1 was forced to de- 
 sist and retire, iieing resolved I should not escape 
 a^ain, twey surrouaded the iiouse lii| uear tutisel; — 
 18 *
 
 SlO *xrt.iuRNCE or 
 
 then they ran (o beat one of the people. Our friends 
 snatched the oppcnt unity and brought me a horse, 
 which I immediately mounted. The mob seeing this, 
 left him ami pursued me. But again Bod delivered 
 me out of their hands. 
 
 Bill hearing 1 was to rrcarh some miles off, on the 
 other side of the water, they immediately divided, 
 (ii being a great flood) to the different bridges — this 
 obliged us to ride many miles about. It being very 
 dark, we lost our way upon the Moors. We wan- 
 dered till v\e were thoroughly wet with snow and 
 rain; but late at night found our way to Thomas 
 Luplon's. The congregation had waited for several 
 hours, being in much trouble for fear I was killed* 
 I changed toy clothes, and though it was late 
 
 b" 
 
 5 
 
 preached to them as the Lord enabled me. It teem- 
 ed to us as little less than heaven: and though it was 
 a hard day. it was a blessed day to my soul. 
 
 I remember once, during these seasons of trouble 
 wherein my life continually hung in suspense, a 
 thought came into my mind, " 'Tis hard, to have no 
 respite, to be thus perpetually suffering." Immedi- 
 ately it was impressed upon my mind, "Did you not, 
 when you was on the borders of despair, promise 
 the Lord, that if he would give you assurance of his 
 favor* yuu would count no suffering, sorrow, or 
 affliction too great to be endured for his name's 
 sake?** This at once silenced ail murmuring, and 
 thenceforth 1 bore whatever befel me, with patience, 
 and after with joy; finding a willingness to bear if, 
 as long as he saw meet, if it were to the end of my 
 lite, 
 
 About this time, I had thirteen or fourteen places 
 where 1 preached at regularly. And I thought only 
 of spending my life among them, when Mr. Grim- 
 shasv mentiot ed me to you. You sent for me, and 
 aske« y " Whether 1 was willing to be a travelling 
 preacher?*' 1 said, "Yes, if Mr. Grimshaw would 
 supply my places:" which he promised to do. That 
 year X was most in the liri&tel and Leeds eircuiurt
 
 Mil. THOMAS LEJEv Sffl* 
 
 the. next in the Leeds circuit altogether, which then 
 comprehended Sheffield and York also, extending 
 into Derbyshire on the soulh, to Hull on the east, 
 and on the north as far as Newton under JRosebury- 
 topping. 
 
 In the >ear 17SS, T was stationed in I/meolnsliiv<». 
 The whole county, now divided into three, was theti 
 only in one circuit. So I spent two months in the 
 eastern p rt. and then two months in the western, 
 1 was in this circuit ahout sixteen months in all. — 
 And I did not labor in vain. There was a very con- 
 siderable increase in the societies, and many souls 
 were brought to the saving- knowledge of God. — And 
 though the rules were long, and the work was hard; 
 yet all was made easy and oomloriahlc. The Lord 
 was greatly with us, and »3ie people in general were, 
 loving and teachable: and 1 know trot, if f shall ever 
 love a people better, on this side eternity. 
 
 Thence I removed into Newcastle circuit, which 
 then included Fdinhurg: to which we went and ba"fe 
 again, in a fortnight, generally preaching night and 
 morning. I found many (rials in this circuit; but 
 the Lord delivered me out of all. The next year 
 I was in the Manchester round, which then contain- 
 ed Lancashire. Cheshire, part of Shropshire, and of 
 "Wales, Staffordshire, and part of Derbyshire. Our 
 tabor was hard; but we saw much fruit of it. partic- 
 ularly at Manchester and Bolton. In the latter part 
 of the year, I was generally supposed to he forgone 
 in a consumption. 1 was not careful about it, not 
 doubting but if the Lord called me, I should finish 
 my course with joy Hui it pleased God to restore 
 my health and strength. May I still glorify hint 
 with my body and my spirit. 
 
 After some years I went (accompanied with my 
 wife) to L.dinburg. Mr. Hopper labored with me. 
 It was now Dr. Krskine published and recommend- 
 ed the eleven Letters ascribed to Mr. Hervey. This 
 •ceashmed a good deal of reproach for a time, after 
 wiucli I was called away to JNeweastle, The wcatit-
 
 $18 fixtaniEKClB a* 
 
 er was verv severe. Dav after flay we had various- 
 storms, and were hardly aWe to preserve life. But 
 tJie worst was when we came to the steep descent 
 from the mountains (Va'led (he Pease) where the hill 
 had fallen into the deep road, and made it utterly 
 impassible! This obliged us to creep along a oath 
 like a sheep track, hanging over a (\ee\t vale. Mean- 
 time the snow and wind heal so furiously upon us, 
 thai we knew not if we should escape with life Af- 
 ter lodging* at old Cammus. (a m ist uncomfortable 
 inn) we went forward through sharp frost, heavy 
 snow heating upon us, and miserable roads to Aln- 
 wiek. From thence to Morpeth we had fair weath- 
 er, hut the next day was heavy rain, which attended 
 us all the way to Newcastle* And here I remained", 
 fully employed till the Manchester conference. 
 
 In 1760, I was stationed at Epworth once more. 
 This winter we were invited to Newark upon-Trent. 
 But we met with much opposition from riotous 
 mobs, encouraged hy great men. On the 24th of 
 March, they took the pulpit out of the preaching- 
 house, and hurnt it in the market place. I went 
 thither on the 7th of April, with Mr. and Mrs. Pool, 
 of North Searle. The preaching was to begin at 
 two o'clock; hut a large moh was there, hefore i be- 
 gan. I prayed, and preached a short sermon. To- 
 ward the latter end of the discourse, they threw a 
 huge quantity of eggs filled with blood and sealed 
 with pitcii, which made strange work wherever they 
 alighted. When they had discharged these they 
 grew more outrageous still. We judged it best, to 
 send to the Mayor; but. instead of coming to quell 
 the riot, he seat an order for me to appear before 
 him. In our way to the main street* there was a 
 deep, muddy drain. They attempted to push me in- 
 to it; but I caught hold of one of the mob, ami he'd 
 him so fist, that they could not push in ode without 
 the other When we came to the Mayor's, he sent 
 for the T«»wn Clerk. J shewed them the act of tol- 
 ei-alion, and the certificate of my license, observing
 
 .MR. THOMAS IKE. 21^ 
 
 f had done nothing, which was not warranted by 
 law. After ranch conversation. our friends gave 
 •videm-e against three of the rioters, who were 
 bound over to (he assizes. 
 
 Some thousands of the moh being gathered in (he 
 street, I requested (he Mayor to senil an officer to 
 guard me through them. He said he would go him- 
 self: and he did go to (he gate; hut when 1 was gone 
 *>nt, immediately went back. I was presently sur- 
 rounded: and tf»ej soon began to throw mire, clods 
 of earth and stone, in abundance. — This they con- 
 tinued «o do, alldmvn (he street, (ill we came to the 
 p] -caching house. < *ur friends, judging there would 
 be no safety there, brought my great coat into (he 
 stable, and advised me to mount and gallop through 
 the mob, which I purposed to do. Accordingly I 
 mounted, but some of them held the gate, and others 
 beat both me and my mare in so violent a manner, 
 that I thought it would be best to dismount and go 
 the back way. But here also the mob met me, 
 beat both me and the mare, and when I endeavored 
 to mount, pulled me back, and the mare got from 
 me. Then they dragged me along, sometimes on 
 my feet, and sometimes on the ground, to the side 
 of the Trent, swearing ihey would throw me in. 
 But they were not agreed in this, so they brought 
 water, and poured it upon me, from head to foot. A 
 painter then came with his pot and brush, and laid 
 it on plentifully. They still surrounded me, throw- 
 ing dirt ard beating me, till I could hardly stir. 
 Then they offered to let me go, if 1 would promise 
 never to come again. But this I could not do. Just 
 then a loan came cursing, swearing am! threatening; 
 offended, it seemed, at their proceedings: at which* 
 most of them left me and dispersed. 
 
 J rose up, and walked as well as I could down the 
 marsh, a few of (be inob quietly walking with me. 
 J f- uud my mate in a sta ding water.: 1 went in, 
 took her and roile off. Coming to a pond I alighted, 
 cashed myself a lillie, ami then weat oa to Nei'tfa*
 
 -14 EXPERIENCE Ufc 
 
 Searle: but it was hard work, as the night eame on, 
 and I was very wet and exceeding cold. When I 
 got there, I procured some dry clothes, and the 
 Lord gave me a quiet night. The next day I was 
 very sore and weak; however, I sat up most of the 
 day, and in a little time I recovered my strength, 
 and had still more cause to trust and praise God. 
 
 On July 16, was our trial at Nottingham. But 
 the grand jury, sparing the rioters all they could, 
 would noi find the hill, for disturbiug me at public 
 worship, but only for assaulting me. They were ac- 
 cordingly hound over, to be tried for the assault, at 
 the next assizes. Meantime an innumerable mob 
 was collected, both within and without the court, 
 threatening what they would do to me. I therefore 
 addressed the Recorder for a guard: He immedi- 
 ately ordered two constables to conduct me safe to 
 my lodging. The mob roared; but dnrst go no far- 
 ther. So I returned home unmolested. At the fol- 
 lowing assizes several of the rioters were indicted: 
 judges warrants were issued out and executed. lu 
 October my counsel and recorder agreed (to prevent 
 all farther trouble) what each offender should pay, 
 after making submission, and promising to otfeud 
 no more. Tbe recorder then gave them a very per- 
 tinent exhortation, and hearing the Nottingham mob 
 was collected again, sent two constables to guard me 
 to my odgin^s, and ordered them to give the people 
 notice, that if any man offered to assault me, he 
 would immediately send him to prison. Thus ended 
 the troublesome affair at Newark. Since then the 
 work of God has prospered greatly. And a conve- 
 nient preaching house has been built, in which nu- 
 merous congregations meet without anv disturbance. 
 
 Thus have I given yon a few imperfect hints of 
 the manner wherein our Lord has dealt with me. 
 My whole life, particularly since 1 have known 
 something of the saving power of religion, has been 
 ai. ended all along with manifold trials, a thousand 
 times more than I have related: yet has the Lord
 
 MR. THOMAS LEE. 215 
 
 been exceedingly gracious lo me, the most unwor- 
 thy of all his people. If I this moment saw all the 
 sufferings I have ha<l for his name's sake; if they 
 were now spread before me, I would say, ««Lord, if 
 thou wilt give me strength, I will now begin again, 
 asid thou shalt add to them lion's dens, and fiery 
 furnaces, and by thy grace I will go through them 
 all." My life, though attended with many erosses, 
 has heen a life of mercies. 
 
 For more than twenty years, I have rarely preach- 
 ed the controversy between the Caiviuisfs and Ar- 
 minians. But my judgment is h*xt: I have no doubt, 
 either of Christ's tasting death for every man. or of 
 his being able and willing to sae to the uttermost, 
 all that come unto God through him. I count it one 
 of the greatest favors, that he still allows me to do 
 a little for him, and that he, in any measure, owns 
 the little which I am able to speak in his name. 
 I beg 1 may he humble at his feet, all the days of 
 my life, and may be more and more like him whom 
 my soul lovetii, till at last I reign with him in glory! 
 I am, dear sir, 
 
 Your willing, though unworthy 
 Servant in the gospel, 
 
 THOMAS LEE, 
 
 October SO, 1 779. 
 
 <* 
 
 THE EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 I WAS born in the year 1758, at Harthill, in the 
 West Riding of Yorkshire. At tour years of age I had 
 learned the catechism, and had repeated it before the 
 minister in the church. 
 
 About that time I had a narrow escape; being near the
 
 •21 G EXPERIENCE OJT 
 
 edge of a deep pond, my foot slipped, and I plunged is. 
 but recovering my»e!f, I struggled to the side, and iavina 
 Isold on some weeds, got out, no one being near that 
 could give me any assistance. 
 
 Jn tiie sixth year, I hud read the bible through sever.il 
 times, and other books that came in oiv way; particularly 
 the history of the sufferings of the proles tan is, in the val- 
 liesj of Piedmont; which fixed in me an aversion to the 
 principles of the church ofltoniej Among the piactittd 
 treaiises in this history, was a Caveat against dancing, 
 v herein was a-scrted, that -'livery step a dancer takes, it 
 a step to hell." rids so affected me, that no inducement 
 could ev,er prevail upon me to attend the dtucing-scbool; 
 which I esteem a singular meicy, as it prevented connec- 
 tions that might have proved very pernicious. 
 
 One da} i wantonly threw a stone and killed a young 
 bird, belonging to a neighbour. Though no one saw me, 
 yet for several nights 1 had little sleep. The idea of the 
 bird's expiring in agonies, through iny wickedness, tilled 
 ir.e with inexpressible anguish. I would have given a 
 great deal to have restored the little creature to life. 
 
 Tears and prayers to God for pardon, and premises 
 to offend him no more, was the only way wherein I foujul 
 relief. 
 
 xVlv parents taught me early the fear of the Lord, as far 
 as they knew; & though their jnsti uctions were tedious & 
 irksome, yet they made an impression on my mind that 
 was never lost, but often recurred when I was alone, or 
 in places of temptation. 
 
 Our Minister was a pious, venerable man, and per- 
 formed his duty with a solemnity that often stiuck me 
 with awe vi the divine presence : particularly when he 
 was reading jt-he burial service. 1 frequently had a dis- 
 tant prospect of judgment and eternity. 1 was agreea- 
 bly affected with thunder and lightning. It filled me 
 with a sen<e of God's majesty and power: for which rea- 
 son 1 would get in the midst of it, though ever so dread- 
 ful, if 1 was not prevented, that I might enjoy the whole 
 report, ami »ee the full blaze. 
 
 In rriv seventh year, I lost all relish for learning, and 
 contracted several evil habits. The two following years, 
 tny time at school was spent to little purpose; part of this 
 I attribute to the being too early taught to read, and too
 
 MR. 6E0RGE STORTf. il7 
 
 close application to it; and part to the want of a proper 
 master, who could suit my genius and engage my curios- 
 ity for useful knowledge. But mv master dying, and be- 
 ing succeeded by one whose ability and method were 
 adapted to my capacity. 1 soon recovered my thirst for 
 learning, and made considerable improvement therein. 
 
 Before I was well able to carry a gun. I was fond of 
 •hooting; till being out one day in the fields, my gun went 
 ofTat hall cock, and was within a very little of killing my 
 brother; this filled me with such horror, that I could not 
 endure that exercise any more. 
 
 When I was about ten years of age God began to re- 
 vive his work of grace in and about Sheffield; the rumor 
 of which spread into our village, and occasioned serious 
 reflections in the minds of many. One evening as I was 
 hearkening to the conversation of my parents on that sub- 
 ject, 1 was struck with an observation they made, that 
 prayer was nothing unless the mind was stayed on God. 
 At night when I repeated my customary prayers, 1 
 watched my thoughts narrowly, and soon found that they 
 wandered from the Lord all the time. This discovery 
 deeply affected me; 1 strove with all my might to think 
 on God as being present, seeing and hearing me: and af- 
 ter repeated efforts, through grace, 1 prevailed. I now 
 began to delight in duties; to pray fervently and feeling- 
 ly, with or without a form, and many times the Lord an- 
 swered me in such a manner as clearly convinced me of 
 his omni*cience and omnipresence. I read the bible 
 with pleasure and profit; tie sufferings of Chi ist filled 
 me with wonder and gratitude, as I now understood that 
 he endured them all for my sins, and to save my soul from 
 eternal destruction. Reading in the thirty-ninth article, 
 that justification was by faith, 1 endeavoured to cast my 
 soul upon the Lord in the best manner I was able, and at 
 times was peisuaded that he had forgiven all my trespass- 
 es. Though I had never heard any of the Methodist 
 preachers, yet from that time 1 felt an esteem for them* 
 and notwithstanding they were loaded with all manner of 
 reproach, and represented in the most detectable li^ht 
 those calumnies only increased my regard for ihem.'be- 
 cause I understood that true Christians, in all f inner 
 ages, had met with the same treatment from the world. 
 
 Having acquired all the learning that was taught at a
 
 EXPF.IUF.VOE OF 
 
 country school; my friends began to think of putting me 
 to some business. G< ing one day to a booksellers shop, 
 in a neighbouring market town. I got acquaint* d w ith Mm, 
 and my friends accepting of his proposal, I soon after 
 vent with him to his place of residence. This introdu- 
 ced me into company, and exposed me to temptations I 
 never knew before: and yet the spirit of God stiove with 
 me more than ever: almost every night I wa» called t<»a 
 st ict account by that inward monitor, and reproved for 
 the faults of the day: and I could seldom sleep, till with 
 prayers and tears I hail implored mercy, and in stone de- 
 gree obtained it from the Lord: and in this manner I 
 went on tor about a year. 
 
 I had often been tempted with the doctrine of predes- 
 tination, but now the tempter drew me insensibly into it; 
 he continually suggested, that if I was tube saved, 1 cer- 
 tainly should, live as I list; b'it if I was ordained to be 
 damned, there was no remedy; God himself could not 
 save me; and therefore it was mete IVIly to give myself 
 so much concern about it. Dot although these suggestions 
 tended to stopify my conscience, and harden my heart, 
 yet I was more uneasy than ever. The Methodists at 
 that time were few and feeble; they had seldom any 
 travelling preachers: I sometimes attended their prayer 
 meetings, and often follow ed then* up and down the town* 
 hoping they would turn and speak to me; but none took 
 any notice of me. 1 was left alone to struggle with sin 
 and satan. 
 
 Ot.e day hearing a preacher was to be there, I attend- 
 ed: but he did not come. Upon this, one of the local 
 preachers, who was then a Calvinist, gave an exhtota- 
 tion: in which he fairly repeated the words that >atan 
 had so often suggested to mc, viz. that if we were to be 
 saved, we could not possibly perish; and if we w re to be 
 damned, there was no help for u<. This made a ri^p 
 impression, and confirmed all that the f'ev il had been 
 preaching to me for years. I believed the horrible doc- 
 trine, and from that time determined to give myself as 
 lirtle trouble a* • os-ible aboiit ;eligion. 
 
 Being surr unded with books. 1 1 ead the first that came 
 to hand, histoiies, novels, plays, and romances, by doz- 
 en-; but they only pleased while my eyes weie i.pon 
 them, and afterwards furnished matter for a thousand
 
 MR. GEORGE STORY. 219 
 
 vain imaginations. 1 then read the lives of the Heathen 
 philosophers, with admiration, and determined to copy 
 after them. I perfected mvself in geometry and trigo- 
 nometry; then I learned Macauley's short hand; soon 
 after, geography and astronomy, together with botany, 
 anatomy, physic, and several branches of natural philoso- 
 phy. O ce I intended studying law, and read a great 
 deal in the statute-; at targe, and other law books: but 
 the subject was t <o dry and unentertaining for one of my 
 desultory disposition^ I coutd recollect reading over 
 three hundred volumes, of one kind or another (some of 
 them were large folios) before I was sixteen years old. 
 My passio i for bjoks was insatiable. I frequently read 
 tiii ten or e'e> en o'clock at night, and be^an again at four 
 or five o'clock in the morning; nor had I paiieuce to eat 
 my meat, unless 1 had a bo >k before me. 
 
 But about this time I was weary of the shop; and en- 
 tered the printing office. This opened a new scene of 
 t; .ings, which pleased me for a season. I was determined to 
 b>- a complete master of m\ business, & in about two years 
 was able to accomplish ray day's work in six hours, so 
 that I had much time upon my hands for study and re- 
 creations. One summer I was an angler, and attend- 
 ed the rivers earlv every morning; but this, after a few 
 months trial, b 1 ought me neither pleasure nor profit. 
 The next summer I commenced florist, took a garden, 
 was passionately fond of auriculus, polyanthuses, &c. 
 Bu< this, too, soon giew insipid; happiness was not to 
 be fiund in these pursuits. In the midst of my reading 
 I met with s one deistical authors; I re^ad and reasoned, 
 till the bible grew not only dull, but, I thought full of con- 
 tradictious. I staggered first at the divinity of Chi istj 
 and at length gave up the bible altogether, and sunk into 
 fatalism and deism. 
 
 This new light promised great satisfaction. I thought 
 myself much wiser than others; but alas, it soon led into 
 a dreary labyrinth! My ideas if Sod and religion, were 
 quite confounded; I felt the wretchedness of my heart 
 but could discover no way to escape from it. 
 
 About the age of eighteen, the management of the prin 
 ting office teil to my share. I had a weekly newspaper 
 to publish, all the > anagraphs to select from the public 
 prints, the advertisements to prepare, the press to cor
 
 2SQ EXFPKIBXFB OP 
 
 rccK and the journeymen and apprentices- to superintend. 
 TM- flattered mv vanity, increased my nati\e pride, tod 
 consequently ltd me further from God. I then sought 
 happiness in caid pla\ n :;; hut utter repeated trial.*, it 
 • | [m aied such a ftilJi waste <tl time, and so oppOftlltJ to 
 common sen-e, that I « a* obliged to <;i\ e it up. Tw ice or 
 thrice I no* inf<i cnmpanv,& was intoxicated with liquor; 
 but in the midst of this f, ll\ I saw it» madness, and turn- 
 ed [rem it with abhorrence. 1 likewise saw it* ruinous 
 consequence*, in th.se I \va« daily surrounded with. — 
 However, I Imped a horse race was a more manly and 
 rational amusement: I therefore attended the races at 
 Doncaster, with the moat flattering expectation of the 
 happiness I should find that week. The first day van- 
 ished away without anv satisfaction; the second was still 
 'fcor-e: a> I passed through the compa.iv. dejected and 
 disappointed, it occurred to my mind, "wjiat is all this 
 immense multitude assembled here fori to see few horsei 
 gallop two or three times round the course, as if the dev- 
 il was both in them & their i iderslCertainl v we areall mad; 
 we are fit for Bedlam, if we imagine that the Almightj 
 made us for no other purpose but to seek happiness in such, 
 senseless amusements!"' 1 was ashamed and confounded, 
 and determined never to be seen there any more. 
 
 W hen I was twenty years old, 1 was glad of the oppor- 
 tunity of seeing London. I went up full of the most san- 
 guine expectations of finding the happinessl was in »earch 
 of, and therefore lost no time in seeing and hearing every 
 thing new & curious that I could &ain access to. But new 
 things quicklv grew old, and the repeated sight of them 
 soon proved disgustful. No happiness followed; but a great 
 anguish of spirit, whenever I attended to the sensations of 
 my own mind. Then I would gladly have travelled into 
 any part of Europe or America, hupinga continual change 
 of scenes would satisfy me. But it was war time, and I 
 could not embark for Holland without a passport from the 
 secretary of state, which I did not know how to procure. 
 
 At length I resolved t« trv if religion would afford me 
 any relief. 1 went to several places of worship, but even 
 this was in vain: there was sornethingdull and disagreea- 
 ble, wherever I turned my eyes, and I knew not that the 
 malady was in myself. A* length I found Mr. W hitfield's 
 chapel, in Tottenham court-road, and was agreeably en-
 
 AIR. GEORGE STORY. 221 
 
 tertained with his manner of preaching; his discourses 
 were so engaging, that when I retired to my lodgings, I 
 wrote down the substance of them in mv journal, and fre- 
 quently read them over with pleasure; but still nothing 
 reached my case, nor had I any light into the state of my 
 soul. Meamiue on the week nights I went to the thea- 
 tres; nor could I di«cern any difference between Mr. 
 Whitfield's preaching and seeing a good tragedy. 
 
 Being now weary of every thing, and every place being 
 equal to me, (tor I carried about with me a mind that was 
 never at rest) I embraced the invitation wf my friends, 
 and returned into the country. I was kindly received, 
 and solicited to enter into business f»r myself. But re- 
 flecting that I was young and inexperienced, I declined 
 the offer, and engaged with a person to manage his prin- 
 ting officp. I was now in an agreeable situation. I wan- 
 ted for nothing. I had more money than I knew what to 
 do with. Yet notwithstanding I was as wretched as I 
 could live, without knowing either the cause of this mise- 
 ry, or any way to escape. 
 
 I had now for some years attempted to regulate my 
 conduct accoulingto reason; but alas! I stood condemn- 
 ed in a thousand instances, even at the bar of that partial 
 judge. From my infancy I was exceeding passionate; 
 and this evil grew upon me, and caused bitter reflections 
 on various occasions, I knew that anger was a paroxysm 
 of madness, that it was contrary to reas-n in every res- 
 pect; 1 therefore guarded against it with all my might. 
 Sometimes I conquered; and those transient victories 
 greatly pleaded me; but if an unexpected temptation sud- 
 denly occurred, all my resolutions were but a* a thread 
 of flax before the fire; and my behavioui was more like 
 that of an enraged wi,d beast, than of a rational creature. 
 Sometimes, when among facetious company. I endeav- 
 oured to catch theii spirit. But in the midst of levity 
 1 iau a dread upon me. Expe ience taught me that their 
 laughter was madness. As soon as I returned to sober 
 thoughts, I found my feigned miith left a melancholy 
 up-Ti my mind. And this was succeeded eiMiei by storms 
 of |>as3ion, or an aversion even to life. L)u-ing this dark 
 nig it o! an, stao , I lost all ie nembrance of God's form- 
 er goodness. 1 wandered to different places of religious 
 worship, but found sufficient matter every where to be 
 19 *
 
 £2& EXPERIENCE Of 
 
 disgusted; at length I forsook them all, and on Sundays 
 
 confined mvself to mv room, or retired to t lie centre 
 of a neighbouring wood. Here I con<-ideicd, with (he 
 closest attention I was able, the arguments for and against 
 deism. I would gladlv liavr given credit to the christian 
 revelation, but could not. My reason leaned to the wtong 
 side, and involved me in endless perplexities. I likewise 
 endeavoured to fortify my»elf with stronger arguments 
 nnd fi.mer resolutions against mv evil tempers; for since 
 I could not be a christian, I wished however to be a good 
 moral heathen. Internal anguish frequently compelled 
 me to supplicate the divine being for mercy and truth; I 
 eelil »m gave over till my heart was melted, and 1 Felt 
 Botnething of God** presence. But I retained those gra- 
 cious impressions only for a short time. 
 
 Being employed in abridging and printing the life of 
 Eugene Arum, who was hung in chains at Knarsborough, 
 for murder, 1 observed that by intense application he at- 
 tained to a prodigious knowledge in the sciences and lan- 
 guages. 1 was so engaged with this account, that I de- 
 termined on the same acquisitions: vainly imagining that 
 a^ I had the desire, so I had the capacity to learn every 
 thing. While I was musing upon these matters, and fix- 
 ing the plan for my future proceedings, the following 
 thoughts fastened upon my mind, and bioke in pieces all 
 mv schemes. "The wisdom of this world is fooli-hness 
 With G>>d. What did this man's wisdom profit him? It 
 did not save him from being a Chief, and a murderer; no, 
 nor from attempting e\en his own life. True wisdom is 
 foolishness with men. He thai will be wise, must first be- 
 come a foul, that he may be wise!" I was like a man 
 awakened out of sleep. I was astonished. 1 felt myself 
 w ong. I was conscious I had been pursuing a vain 
 shadow; and that God only could direct me into the 
 *i<dit path. I therefore applied to him with earnest im- 
 portunity, entreating him to shew me the true way to 
 happiness; which I was determined to follow, however 
 difficult or dangeious. 
 
 Just at this time a work of grace broke out in the vil- 
 lage where I was born, through the labours of a person re- 
 markably zealous for the cause of God. My mother, in 
 particular, was deeply convinced of the truth, which she 
 soon experienced, and retained the life and power thereof 
 to her dying day. She was much concerned for me, bop-'
 
 MR. GEORGE STORY. 2SS 
 
 i'ng if I could be brought among religious persons. I should 
 likewise, soon be convinced. She therefore, by an ac- 
 quaintance, intreated me to converse with the Methodists, 
 I answered, '-If my mother desires it I will \isi( them 
 with all niv heart." The first time I entered a Metho- 
 dist', house, they went to prayer with me, and for me, a 
 considerable time. I looked upon them a* well-meaning 
 ignorant people, and thought no more about the matter. 
 In a. few days they desir.-d 1 would come and see them 
 again. Considering ir v\a» my mother's tequest, I went, 
 without hesitation. I found lour or five persons in the 
 house, with whom I disputed about religion for some hours, 
 till I had fairly wt-a; ied them. They lab ui ed to co ivince 
 me, that I wa*- a sinner, and in danger of eternal death. 
 if I did not repent and return to God. These were sub- 
 jects I had no kind of idea of; and as their arguments 
 were only supported by scriptuie, for which I had very 
 little regard, all they said made not the least impres- 
 sion. 
 
 As I was about to withdraw, not a little elevated with 
 my imaginary victory, one of the company desired to a-k 
 ine a f> w questions, the first was, '-Are you happv?" Mv 
 countenance instantly fell, and I a'.s.vered from the dic- 
 tates -if my conscience, '-No:" she then enrjuii ed, if I was 
 notdesiious of finding happiness? I replied, it had b^en 
 my pursuit ever since I could remember; that I was wii. 
 ling to obtain it on any terms', and that I had sought *or 
 it every way I could think of, but in vain. She tht-n 
 shewed me the true way of obtaining the hap. ine*, I 
 wanted, assuri-'g me if I sought the Loid with all my 
 heart I should certainly find in him that peace and plea- 
 suie which the world could not bestow. Eveiy word 
 sunk deep into my mind; and freni that moment 1 never 
 lo-t my convictions, nor my resolutions to be truly devo- 
 ted to God. 
 
 'I immediately broke off all connections with my com- 
 panions; threw my useless b oks into the fire; and sought 
 the Lord with all my might. I soon discovered the impor- 
 tance of the scrip r «re ; that there was no other revela- 
 tion of the divine wilt to mankinds; that I must credit the 
 truths contained therein, however -ppositethev appeared 
 to my own vitiated reason. I found my reason had been
 
 114 EXPRHIEN.OB otr 
 
 deceived and corrupted by the suggestions of an enemy, 
 a!<l that 1 could tru-.t it » » • » more, till it was renewed by 
 grace: that my inemmy wa«i filled with a train of 1'al-e 
 idea*, eveiy moment presenting themselves and leading 
 me from God; and that my understanding w.as totally 
 dark, till divine illumination should \isit me. 
 
 Reading Mr. Hervey'* dialogue*, this light shone upon 
 me, and 1 «a- much delighted with the discovery of the 
 divinity of Christ, and the atonement which he made for 
 sinner-. About thi- time I heard M . Pugil preach; his 
 discourse w is suited to one in mv state, and. the power of 
 mv evil reasoning 1 * was suspended wuile he de. cubed 
 the work "f grace in the soul. I **w the way of ju.stifi- 
 cation and full sanetification so clearly, ihat 1 could 
 trace the path a-, if it had been a road delineated in a map. 
 
 The next di-c rvery I had was the hardness of my 
 heart: this called ufl my attention from every thing else: 
 neithei feai s nor joys, heaven or hell made any iiopresaiftH 
 on it: I often thought that satan himself could n -t possj- 
 bl v have a more obdurate heart. 1 found it was full of pride, 
 ambition, anger, evil desire, unbelief, and every thing that 
 was vile and vain. Being invited to join the society, I 
 gUdly embraced the opportunity, and found much ei - 
 courage menl to seek the Lord, notwithstanding all the 
 wretchedness I felt in myself. 
 
 Attending to the experience of the people, I observed 
 thai almost all of them, during the time of conviction, 
 v, «ere exc.e ci-ed with horrible fears and terrors; and 
 thence I ctncluded.it wa» necessary I should have the 
 same. For at that time 1 did not know, that frequently, 
 tho^e distracting terro s were from the enemy, in e der 
 to drive the soul into despair. I therefoie u.-ed every 
 method to bring myself under dreadf 1 apprehensions; 
 hoping this would break my stubborn heart: but 1 toold 
 ne.er find that »ind of experience. After several weeks 
 struggling with thih obduracy, at last I resigned myself to 
 the Lord, when he was plea-ed to regard my distress; and 
 while W. B ammah was at prayer, the st,fening power of 
 grace descended a .d removed the stony heait. 
 
 I now found a great change in my mind, but it wa« not 
 complete; for I had no consciousness of the pardon of sin, 
 which I was convinced was the privilege of *he children 
 of God: therefoie 1 could not conclude myself justified:
 
 MR. GE0ROE STORY. 22© 
 
 however, I began to seek for that b'essing with all dili- 
 gence: many difficulties occurred in the way. The old 
 train of pernicious ideas continually presented them- 
 selves; I could not meditate a moment without linking 
 into deism: and I was equally embarrassed with the doc- 
 trine of predestination. Indeed their connection seem- 
 ed inseparable; I could not bv any means disjoin one 
 from the oth a r. And I repeatedly found, that the mo- 
 ment I suffered my mind to embrace either of them, I 
 lost sight of God, and plunged into blackness or darkness. 
 The wretchedness. I then fait was insupportable, accom- 
 panied with suggestions to blaspheme, or to embrace 
 atheism. After many sore conflicts, the Lord shewed me 
 a path by which I mi^ht escape; and that was, by stay- 
 ing my mind upon him, and ceasing from these reason- 
 ings. This [ found was a sate, though painful path: it 
 equally mortified mv proud reason, and vain imagina- 
 tions. While graciois promises occurred, and encoura- 
 ged ine t ' follow on to know the Lord. Now I began to 
 look up for the pa; don of sin; I saw that it was purchased 
 by Chri-t. and that God y;a\e it freely; that no works or 
 sufferings of mine, could in the least degree merit this 
 ble->siui;; but that it was to be received by faith. 
 
 But here again [ \va» greatly embarrassed; the scrip- 
 ture universally testified that I must believe or perish; 
 my friends were continually urging me to believe and I 
 should be saved. Upon close examination I found that I 
 did believe every truth iu the bible; yet this did not b iog 
 a sense of justification. And I durst not think that G-»d 
 was reconciled to me, when I was conscious of the con- 
 trary. But the Lord soon brought me out of t'>is dilem- 
 ma, by shewing me, that to forgive was his prerogative; 
 and 10 believe, was my duty. This believing for salva- 
 tion. 1 found was a distinct thing from believing I was sav- 
 ed; I found it implied, the lifting up of my heart to the 
 Lot d, in ferment prayer, looking to him with a single eye 
 and steady aim; without evil reasonings, or vain wander- 
 ing-; cleaving to him with all my strength; casting my 
 soul upon his mercy, and depending upon his promises. 
 
 Wliiie I persisted in this, I found I was saved from 
 many evils, and the great ble-sing I had in view was often 
 near: sometimes I could lay hold on it for a moment, and 
 found peace and joy; but I had been so long habituted te 
 
 9 "- '
 
 226 mxrrRiiNCE or 
 
 unbelief, that it often rote spontaneously and overturned 
 all my consolation. 1 had therefore t« > renew all my ef- 
 forts hourly, and to rise as speedy as possible from every 
 rail En this exercise I continued about two months. — 
 Many times I lt»t 1 1 1 v way by too scrupulously regarding 
 the experience of others, yet I bad never found anj tiling 
 like despair, unless 1 w il fully reasoned myself into it: nor 
 tould I attain to any deep terrors, uliicli were too much in- 
 sisted on, as a necessary branch of conviction. I likewise 
 formed wrong ideas ol justification: I warned some great 
 work to be wrought upon me, that I might have something 
 very remarkable to boast of. And therefore, when the 
 Lord gently drew near, and manifested his peace in a small 
 degree, I rejected u with disple. sure. 1 even contended 
 wiih the Lord, till he strongly impressed upon mv mind 
 tl ••->• words, "I will bring the blind bs a way they know 
 not; I will make darkness light before them, and crooked 
 tin; gs straight: these things will I do unto them, and not 
 foisake them " I was now convinced of the nece-sitv of 
 receiving with thankfulness, the smallest tokens of the di- 
 vine favour; and that [ must suffer, with child-like simpli- 
 city, the Lord to lead me in his own way. This was soon 
 followed by a clear manifestation of pardoning me cy, that 
 excluded all doubts, temptations, and fears, accompanied 
 with a joy, unspeakable, and full of glory. 
 
 I continued praising a reconciled God for some days. 
 The happiness 1 felt, carried me above every difficulty. — 
 1 could discern and reject the first approach of temptation. 
 I now thought, my mountain was so strong, 1 should never 
 be moved. I did not know that I should meet with war 
 any more. Indeed 1 expected to go right forward to heav- 
 en, in a short time. My mind had been so intense y en- 
 gaged in seeking pardon, that I had quite forgot there was 
 a further work of grace to be wrought in me. But the 
 Lord did not suffer me to remain long under that mistake. 
 He soon discovered the remains of the carnal mind, and 
 the necessity of its removal; I had scarce began earnestly 
 to seek after that blessing, before the tempter returned 
 with double rage. I saw an invaluable privilege betore me, 
 but the way was difficult; a thousand arguments were pre- 
 sented to discourage my pursuit. 
 
 Oiice 1 lost the peace of God, by attending to a discourse 
 which set justification exceeding high, confounding it with
 
 MR. OE0R«E STORY. 2.^7 
 
 full sanctification. Viewing myself in this false glass, and 
 not finding 1 had all the marks which the preacher said b— 
 longed to one born of God, 1 fell into the snare of satan; 
 gave up my shield, and suffered myself to be persuaded 
 that all 1 had experienced of the goodness of God, was a 
 mere delusion For some hours 1 was in as deep distress 
 as I had ever known. And 1 saw no way to escape, but 
 by returning to the Lord in faith; who then discovered and 
 broke the snare. 
 
 1 had suftered so much by evil reasonings on many oc- 
 casions; but now 1 was determined to use double vigilance 
 against them. Yet the enemy sugge>ted to use, "Thou 
 mayest now take thy time; thou art;t child of God; and if 
 once in Christ, always in Christ; as for full sanctification, 
 it will be accomplished some time or other; perhaps in the 
 article of death. Gad has begun the work, ai:d he will fin- 
 ish it; therefore take thy ease, and enjoy thy present com- 
 fort." But L saw, whether these were true or false argiH 
 merits, the conclusion was deadly. Therefore 1 rejected 
 the suggestions, with all my might, and determined to be 
 wholly devoted to God. 
 
 In the midst of great exercises of mind, through mani- 
 fold temptations, I omitted no opportunity of exhorting all 
 about me, to flee from the wrath to come. God was pleas- 
 ed to stiiile upon my vveak endeavours, and to make me in- 
 strumental in the conversion of several. Afterwards I 
 was convinced I ought to act in a more public manner; but 
 1 saw the danger of being too forward, as well as of being 
 too backward, and was enabled to keep from both ex- r 
 tremes. When an opportunity offered of giving an exhor- 
 tation in an . of the neighbouring societies, I did it with 
 much fear and trembling; but 1 durst not shun the cross. 
 Indeed I laboured under ^reat disadvantages. Though a 
 natural impediment in my speech, 1 could not easily pro- 
 nounce several words: and it was a considerable time before 
 1 could conquer, or substitute others in their place. 1 hop- 
 ed my acquaintance with authors on m.s; subjects migot 
 be of some use to me: but 1 was greatly mistaken; my 
 mind was in a situation that forbade all kind of medita- 
 tion. If I attempted any such thing,! was instantly filled 
 with m} <*ld deistieai ideas again. 1 was therefore neces- 
 sitated to >tay my thoughts upon the Lord, a^d to follow 
 his light and truth, as they shone upon me. What know-
 
 ££S BXPKRIKNOK OI 
 
 ledge 1 had acquired, while in the spirit of apnstacy from 
 God, ! w;^ obliged to throw away, as altogether uselt • -. 
 
 After some time, a scene opened which Mas bo li pain- 
 ful and profitable: we took an old chapel, in a neighbouring 
 ▼illage, the inhabitant* el which in general, differed v. ry 
 little from the savage Indiana, Here I ffrquentfy preach- 
 ed to large congregations, and met with plenty of perse- 
 cution for my pains: but it was not u > ipectea, and I was 
 determined to stand n though it should cost me raj life* 
 
 Onetime a popish gentleman hired some men to pull me 
 out of the pulpit; though 1 was ignorant uf Ibeir design, 1 
 psovidentially fixed mv eye upon them as soon as they came 
 in. They were confounded, and stayed peaceably till '.lie 
 service was over. Sometimes the mob revenged ill mselves 
 on the door and windows, throwing whatever came next 
 to hand; and then followed us through the struct wth mire 
 and dirt. Ar an a joining village, Where I was to preach, 
 aoose had engaged a mad man; and to qualify hi n inoie 
 perlectly for the work, had made him drunk, lie came 
 armed w ith a large cluo, and raging in a most furious man- 
 ner I was waiting calmly lor the event, when the man's 
 wife came, and having endeavoured in vain to persuade 
 him to go away, tell into violent fits. Seeing this, he in- 
 stantly became as quiet as a lamb, and we returned with- 
 out the least injury. 
 
 Soon alter 1 entered into the most afflicting dispensa- 
 tion 1 had ever known; which continued three mouths. I 
 gradually sunk into unaccountable anguish of mind, as if 
 the power of darkness surrounded me without intermission. 
 Sometimes such horror penetrated my whole soul, as if I 
 had committed some atrocious ciime, and was instantly to 
 stand before the great judge, to receive the sentence of 
 eternal damnation. Very often 1 expected instant death; 
 my whole frame seemed just dissolving. Jn the midst of 
 all, I found the grace of God was sufficient to support me 
 under it; my conscience was free from condemnation; and 
 I saw this distress was part natural, and part diabolical. 
 I still kept cleaving to the Lord, and stay, d my mind up- 
 on him: the cloud bioke. aim my former peace returned — 
 I found something daiy dying within me; but what it was 
 1 could not teli. When 1 was at the lowest, t began to 
 rise again, and continued increasing in tne life of God for 
 three months more. 1 was then one evening meeting my
 
 MR. GE«R»E STORY. 2£9 
 
 band, when the power of the Lord descended in an un- 
 common manner, anil I believed he had purified my heart. 
 At first I rejected it through a sense of my unworthiness; 
 but the witness again returned. I considered, "What 
 have I either done or suffered, that could induce the Lord 
 to shew me this great mercy?'' And 1 was upon the point 
 of giving up again, when it occurred to my mind, "By 
 grace ye are saved through faith, and that not of your- 
 selves, it is the gift of God; not of works, lest any man 
 should boast." I was then constrained to acquiesce, and 
 said, since it is so, I will hold fast, if I can. 
 
 The next morning I awoke in such power and peace as 
 I had never known, and the promises in the latter part of 
 the 30th chapter of Exekiel, were applied in such a man- 
 ner, as left no doubt but the Lord had wrought that great 
 change in me. Nevertheless, it was not in the manner I 
 expected. I supposed a soul saved from all sin, would be 
 a great, wise, and glorious creature; whereas I found my- 
 self infinitely little, and mean, and base: I had such a dis- 
 covery of my own nothingness, as humbled me to the dust 
 continually. I felt myself as ignorant and help'ess as an 
 infant, and knew I could not stand a moment without the 
 divine aid. Nor did I find such overflowing joys as I ex- 
 pected, but only an even permanent peace, which kept my 
 heart in the knowledge and love of God. 
 
 Meantime several scriptures were opened tome at once: 
 and 1 found a delightful relish for the whole. But still 
 I found knowledge in divine things was to be acquired 
 gradually, through patient labor; and that even this was 
 limited: God giving no more than was necessary, and at 
 such times as ne pleased. 
 
 I walked in this liberty some months, till one day I met 
 with a circumstance which grieved me. 1 attended too 
 much to the temptation, and was not inwardly watchful; 
 so before I was aware, the temptation took place in my 
 heart, and 1 found myself angry for a moment or two. 
 And I never expected to feel this evil any more; my dis- 
 tress was inconceivable for three or four hours; the enemy 
 suggesting that I was now an apostate from the pure love 
 of God, and could never be restored. I cried mightily to 
 the Lord, and he discovered the device of the enemy, and 
 healed the wound that had been made. He likewise 
 shewed me, that as I had received Christ Jesus, so I must 
 20 
 /
 
 250 KXPEUIEN'CK or 
 
 walk in him; that the same faith by which I entered into 
 rest, must be continued, in order to be established in that 
 liberty. 
 
 The conference being at Leeds in the year 176 2, I at- 
 tended with a design of edifying by the public discourse I 
 and private conversation of (he preachers. And herein 
 1 had abundant reason to bo satisfied. Mr. Wesley's SCI - 
 mons were in s peculiar manner calculated for establish- 
 ing me in what I had lately experienced. During the 
 conference, it appeared there wanted several move preach- 
 ers as itinerant*, in different circuits. My friends propo- 
 sed me as one, and asked if I had any objection. As I 
 was resigned lo an\ station providence seemed to point 
 out, I submitted to the judgment of my brethren. Being 
 admitted on trial, I returned home to settle my affairs; ana 
 in the latter end of February, 17G3, 1 went into the Dales 
 circuit. 
 
 When 1 got to Darlington, the town was in an uproar, 
 occasioned by George Bell's prophecy. — That day, a* cord- 
 ing to his prediction, the world was to be destroyed. Ma- 
 ny people were much frightened; but their fears soon gave 
 place CO resentment! and they threatened to pull down the 
 house, and burn the first preacher that came- However, 
 considering that God was all-sufficient, I told Mrs. Os- 
 wald, if she would venture the house, I would venture my- 
 self. Notice being given for preaching, the place was 
 soon filled with people, rude enough. Providentially I 
 found in the Newcastle paper, a paragraph, wherein Mr. 
 Wesley disavowed all connection with Mr. Bell, and all 
 credit to his prophecy. This 1 read to the people, which 
 instantly quieted them, and they attended patiently to the 
 end nf the meeting. A poor backslider was that night cut 
 to the heart, and roared out in a tremendous manner. 
 But shortly after he found mercy, and died in peace. 
 
 In this circuit I found several societies of sincere peo- 
 ple; but many of them were settled upon their Lees: those 
 who had obtained justification were resting in their past 
 experience, and had little expectation of being saved from 
 inward sin, till death. 1 spoke strongly of full salvation, 
 and God gave the word success. Several were stirred up 
 to seek for purity of heart, and others were convinced of 
 sin. Mr. Samuel Meggot, a zealous pious preacher, was 
 my feHow-laborer,in whom 1 found the affection of a parent.
 
 ME. GEORGE STORY. 231 
 
 Meeting me one day in the Dales, he said, "You must 
 make haste to Barnard-Castle; the people are all in con- 
 tusion; six or seven of them have found full sanctification, 
 and the rest are tearing one another to pieces about it." 
 When 1 got to the town, I found many were not a little 
 prejudiced against me, as a setter forth of strange doc- 
 trines. I attempted to preach among them, but could find 
 no liberty; 1 met the society, but it was still the same. 1 
 was just going to conclude, when, in an instant, the power 
 of God descended in a wonderful manner. The assembly 
 were all in tears; some praising God for pardoning mercy, 
 and others for purifiving grace. And even those who 
 could not yet understand this new doctrine, were con- 
 strained to say, "If we do not believe it, we will never 
 spsak against it any more." The snare of the enemy was 
 effectually broken; and from that time the work spread, 
 not only through the town, but also into the neighboring 
 societies. We seldom had any meeting, public or private, 
 but some were either convinced, justihed, or saved from 
 a>l sin. 
 
 The society in Wear-Dale consisted of thirty-six mem- 
 bers. But on sabbath, at two o'clock, the divine power 
 descended upon the assembly; six persons, one after ano- 
 ther dropped down, and as soon as they came to them- 
 selves, cried out for mercy. The work from that time re- 
 vived and spread through the different parts of the Dale. 
 and the society was soon doubled in its number, many of 
 whom stand to this day. 
 
 In other places the people were remarkably lively, and 
 many were added 'o the societies. 1 continued in this 
 circuit till July, 1764, having the satisfactory evidence 
 that I was acting in a station suitable to the design of pro- 
 vidence. This greatly supported me in the various difticu! - 
 ties that unavoidably occurred. Indeed I exerted myself 
 much above my strength, both in preaching and travelling, 
 often venturing in tempestuous weather, over those drea- 
 ry fells, when even the mountaineers themselves durst 
 not. 1 was frequently in danger of being swallowed up in 
 the bogs, or carried away by the torrents. Sometimes I 
 have rode over vallies where the snow was eight or ten feet; 
 deep, for two or three furlongs together When the danj 
 ger was most imminent, 1 not only found a calm resigna- 
 tion, but a solid rejoicing in the God of my salvation.
 
 THE EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 JO. 'JO'MZt WAS Wtf . 
 
 TO THE REV. MR. JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 «Ve/com6, n»ar Shafltbury, Aug. 31*/, 1780. 
 Key. Sir, 
 
 I AM a person who has neither ability nor inclination 
 to say much of myself; being desirous to be little and 
 unknown. 
 
 Nevertheless, if this short account of the mercy of 
 God to a sinner, may be of the least use to any, all the 
 praise shall he given to him, by whose grace I am what I 
 am: for I always desire to bear in mind that testimony of 
 St. Paul, 1. Tim. i. 15. ** This is a faithful saying, and 
 worthy of all acceptation, that Christ Je»us came into 
 the world to save sinners, ot whom I am chief." 
 
 I was born in the year of our Lord 1 732. in the parish 
 of Hamblcdon, about eight miles from Portsmouth. 
 When I was about four years old, my father died, 
 and soon after my mother. Such was the order of di- 
 vine providence, that 1 had but little knowledge or help 
 from them: but Almighty goodness provided for me. 
 
 When my mother died, I was removed to Portsmouth 
 Common, by the care of her own sister, the wife of Mr. 
 Richard Libbaid, who had lived there in good credit for 
 many years; and I was to them as their own child. 
 
 I believe my aunt lived in the fear of God, and accord- 
 ing to the light she had, endeavoured to bring me up in a 
 religious manner. 1 have great reason to be thankful to 
 God on her account. Many of her instructions I remem- 
 ber to this day, with much comfort: and 1 have not a 
 doubt, but that she is now in Abraham's bosom. 
 
 Yet notwithstanding all the care that was taken of me, 
 1 gave way to evil, and did many things contrary to the 
 Word of God; on account of which, I remember to have 
 Felt many sharp convictions before 1 was ten years of age.
 
 MH. JOHN MASON'. 233 
 
 I was often alarmed with the fear of death and judgment. 
 1 trembled at the thought of being cast into the fire of hell. 
 At those timea 1 frequently went alone, and prayed that 
 God would have mercy upon me, and save me foom my 
 sins. As 1 grew up, 1 saw more and more into the e^.l 
 ot sin. But although 1 truly hated sin, 1 was often ove - 
 co iie by it, which abundantly increased my pain and 
 sorrow. 
 
 But it was by hearing a sermon of Mr. Whitfield's, 
 and those of a pious minister, whose congregation 1 now 
 attended, that my convictions deepened. 1 began to see 
 myself as 1 never had done before, and to know 1 was a 
 fallen child of Adam. I felt the burthen with deep disjj 
 tre-9. My sleep departed from me, and 1 neglected to 
 take my necessary food. 1 cried to God night and day. 
 1 longed for his salvation. But 1 was afraid, Christ did 
 not die for me. When this persuasion prevailed, it 
 cut me off. I was as one that had no hope: 1 cannot de- 
 scribe the anguish that tortured my poor soul. Some- 
 limes I wished I had never been born; at other times, 
 that 1 had been an idi it from my birth. And many time*, 
 such was my ignorance, and the force of temptation, 1 
 complained against G -d for making me what I was. 
 
 While 1 was exercised in this gloomy dejected manner, 
 1, one evening took up the New- Testament to read, a id 
 1 hope never to forget the time O' place. As I read. I fe!f, 
 1 cannot tell how, an unusual going out after God and 
 Christ. At once my eye, and all the powers of my soul 
 were fixed on these words, Heb. ii. 9 "But we see Jesus 
 who was made little lower than the angels, for the suffer- 
 ing and death, crowned with glory and honour, that He 
 bv the grjice of G >d should taste death for every man." 
 The deep silence that rented on me ga e way, and 1 broke 
 out as in an extacy of joy, not regaiding who might hear, 
 "For me he liv'd, and for me he died." 
 
 In a moment, all my burden of pain and sorrow fled 
 away, and all my soul was tilled with peace and toy. 1 
 was all love to God and man. Truly my delight was in 
 the Almighty, and 1 began to 9ing aloud, 
 
 "O for a thousand tongues to sing, 
 
 "My dear Redeemer's praise: 
 "The glories of my God and King, 
 
 ••The triumphs of lhs grace." 
 20 *
 
 ^34 KlFKJtSSMtFS UT 
 
 Happy would it have been for me, if I hat) been careful 
 to grow in the grace of God. But I gave way to a curious 
 Spirit, and pu/.yJed myself with doubtful disputati ma. 
 And by this means. I gradually damped the grace of God, 
 and cast the Messing away ! had been entrusted witli.. 
 
 Soon after thi>, the Methodist preachers came to 
 Portsmouth. I went to hear them, and the word was 
 made profitable (a me. i felt new desiies, and was of en 
 much comforted, and 1 once more resolved to give up my 
 body and soul a saoifice to Bod. I was admitted into 
 the society, b Mr. James Odd v. I continued to meet 
 with them for some time; and many ware the blessings I 
 thereby received. — But after a time, a stumbling block 
 was laid in my wav, and I left 'he society. But it was 
 ohiefly owing to my inexperience, and want of patience* 
 1 ought to have minded one tiling, whatever others did, 
 and to have pressed on to the prize of our high calling. 
 
 After this, 1 went on for five years, in darkness, mis- 
 ery and distress, yea, many times almost in de-pair; yet 
 1 constantly attended the preaching, and sometimes was 
 permitted to stay in the meeting <«f the society: but when 
 my much esteemed friepd, Mr. Robert Roberts came in- 
 to the circuit, he was informed of me; for I believe both 
 the preachers and people had a regard for me. He gave 
 me a note of admittance again. May 1 never forget this 
 mercy ! 
 
 It was not long after, being at a prayer meeting with 
 a few friends, that 1 recoveied the peace, and love of 
 G >d. My soul was humbled in the dust: 1 became solidly 
 happy in God my Saviour. I was watchful, a>d spent 
 much time in prayer: the Word of God was my dailj 
 companion, and it was spirit and life to my soul. My 
 faith was now strengthened: my love to God* and man 
 increased abundantly. The Lord held me by the hand, 
 and fed me with the bread of life. He gave me to drink 
 ef the water of the river of life, and 1 was happy all the 
 day long. Such was the blessing 1 continually enjoyed, 
 1 lived near to God. keeping Jesus in my view, as my life, 
 mv pattern, and my ail. 
 
 When Mr. Francis Gilbert appointed me to take care 
 ©f a class, it was a great trial. But so much the more 
 d?d the Lord make it a blessing to me. For while 1 pray- 
 ed fur my brethren; and laboured to help them forv&rfL
 
 MR. /OHN MASOff. *3"5 ; 
 
 in the way to the kingdom, he gave me great consolation 
 in in y own soul; and I began to feel a stronger desire for 
 the .salvation of poor sinners. 1 reproved, advised, and 
 c 'inforted, as opportunity served: being, at the same 
 time, pa ticularly careful over my own behaviour. Mean 
 time, by the desire of my Mends, I sometimes read a 
 sermon, or s one part of the Christian libiarv. I did fhi«, 
 first in our own society, and afterwards in that of a 
 neighbouring town. Sometimes also, 1 ventured to give 
 a few woids of exhortatn-n; and the people not only b<re 
 witumy weakness, but urged me to do it more frequent- 
 ly Some time after, I felt a strong conviction, that it 
 was my duty to preach. 1 did »■» occasional v; and though 
 it was with much weakness, fear, and trembling, the Lord 
 ow:ied my feeble attempts; the people were profited, and 
 my own soul was helped forward in the grace of God. 
 1 advised with the assistant, and the other preachers, and 
 being encouraged by them, 1 went on therein, relying 
 upon God, who giveth strength to them that have no 
 might. 
 
 But 1 was not long satisfied with this. 1 found a strong- 
 er and stronger conviction, that it was my duty to give 
 myself wholly up to the Work of God, and commence an 
 itinerant preacher. But I shrunk from the thought. I 
 wept, and prayed, and strove against it with all my 
 »nit,ht, til! I had well nigh lost all the life and peace of 
 God out of my soul. Yet 1 did not comply: it \< as so con- 
 trary to the plan I had just laid down, having (as 1 sup- 
 posed) settled myself for life. It was my desire and d<- 
 sign, to live anil die. amongst my first religious acquaint- 
 ance, and then to lay my bones by the side of my dear 
 and only brother, j i<t torn from me bv the hand of death. 
 
 But not bei;i£ able to resist any longer, I laid the mat- 
 ter before Mr. Furz. and the other preacners in the cir- 
 cuit. They advised me to fight against Gad no more, but 
 prepare my-elf against the next conference. 1 did so, 
 and attended at B istol in August, 1764. 1 can truly 
 say, I had no othei end in view but toe glory of God. and 
 the good of souls. With regard to this world, 1 had all 1 
 wante.i, and to spare. A A d I had a prospect of easily 
 gaiuing much more, had 1 remained in my business, which 
 was steady, and continually increasing. But this 1 ga»e 
 tip freely, nor have 1 repented of it, one moment since.—
 
 23d KXPERIENCB Of 
 
 .And if it were to do again, 1 believe 1 should do it with 
 the same cheerfulness. For he is worthy of all my ser- 
 vice, who has bought me with his precious blood. 
 
 You sir, were pleased to appoint me to labour in the 
 York circuit with Mr. Furzand Mr. Pool. It was a year 
 of much peace and comfort: and I resolved, in the strength 
 of Curist, to continue spending, and be spent, in the bles- 
 sed work, to my life's end. 
 
 It is of little use to say in what parts of Kngland, Ire- 
 land, and the Isle of Man, 1 have laboured; or how many 
 persons have been convinced of sin, or converted to God: 
 or how many have been added to the societies, in the cir- 
 cuits wherein 1 have laboured. Let it suffice, that this, 
 and all I am, will be fully known in that great day. But 
 1 believe, 1 may be permitted to mention, in the tear of 
 God, that after sixteen years labour, 1 do not know, that 
 either my principles or practice, have given you, sir, or 
 any of my biethren, cause to repent, for a moment, that 
 you leceivedme as a fellow-labourer in the house of God. 
 And in this 1 am the same at this day, as at the fir t. 1 
 still esteem it no small privilege, to act with you,as,ason 
 in the gospel, to be directed by you, where, when, and 
 how to act. 
 
 1 bless God, 1 still daily enjoy a measure of his peace 
 and love. But 1 am ashamed, when I consider how little 
 imprnvent 1 have made. 1 long to have every thing ta- 
 ken from me, that is not agreeable to the mind that was 
 in Christ. 
 
 For many years 1 have been fully satified with regard 
 to the doctrines of the Methodists: and in them I hope to 
 live and die. But fiom the time that 1 recovered the fa- 
 vour of God, 1 have always been averse to disputing. 1 
 remember how much 1 suffered therebv, in the beginning 
 of my turning to God. And I believe it would be happy, 
 if all the children of God would s'rive to agree, as far as 
 possible, and live in love as biethren, and strive to help 
 each other in fighting the good fight of faith. This is the 
 one desire, and I hope it will be the continual labour of, 
 Uevereud si>, 
 
 Your dutiful son in the gospel, 
 
 JOHN MASON.
 
 THE EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 I WAS born in the parish of Bingley, Yorkshire, De- 
 cember 3, 1726. My parents both died in the faith. I 
 lived with them seven years, and seven years more with 
 an uncle, who was in the same parish. From five years 
 old I had strong convictions at times, and put up many 
 prayers for mercy. And though I had no one to teach me, 
 yet I had the fear of God in my heart. If I was over- 
 taken in any sin, I was much troubled, till I said my pray- 
 ers, which I thought would make all up. 
 
 At fourteen I was put apprentice to be a mason. While 
 I lived with my master, I had little concern for my soul. 
 But after six years, at the time of the rebellion, I enlisted 
 among the Yorkshire Blues. I continued with them about 
 a year. There was one man among us, who had the fear 
 of God before his eyes He gave me good advice, which 
 one time in particular, took great effect upon me and my 
 comrade. We, both of us were under deep convictions, 
 but knew not what to do to be saved: I began to fear 
 death exceedingly, knowing I was not fit to die. These 
 words followed me continually; "cursed is every one that 
 continueth not in all things, written in the book of the 
 law, to do them." I thought I must fcdfil the law, or be 
 damned, I strove all I could to fulfil it; but I thought I 
 grew worse and worse, till my load was many times heav- 
 ier than I could bear. 
 
 In the year 1746, the rebellion being over, we were dis- 
 charge's I then sought fur a people that feared God, and 
 soon joined the society. I heard John Nelson several 
 times, and began to have some hope of finding mercy: 
 some time after I went to hear Mr. Grimshaw, and was 
 convinced that we are to be saved by faith: yea, that the 
 very worst of sinners might be saved, by faith in Jesus 
 Christ. Soon after, I heard Mr. Charles Wesley preach 
 from these words, "I am determined not to know any 
 thing among you, save Jesus Christ, and him crucified."
 
 238 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 He shewed clearly, that Christ is able and willing t» save 
 the greatest sinners. 1 was much refreshed under the ser- 
 mon, and much more so in singing these words, 
 
 "Whither should a sinner go? 
 "His wounds for* me stand open wide: 
 
 'Only Jesus will I know, 
 "And Jesus crucified." 
 
 But when he told us, we might know our sins forgiven 
 in this lite; yea, this very moment, it seemed tome a new 
 doctrine, and 1 could not believe it at all. But I contin- 
 ued in prayer; and in a few days, I was convinced of it to 
 my great joy. The love of Christ broke into my soul, and 
 drove away all guilt and fear: and at the same time he 
 filled my heart with love both to God and man. I saw that 
 God was my salvation, and now could trust him, and praiae 
 him wiih joyful lips. J could sing with all my heart, 
 
 "O what shall I do my Saviour to praise! 
 "So faithful and true, plenteous in grace! 
 "So strong* to deliver, so good to redeem, 
 '•The weakest believer that hangs upon him!" 
 
 Soon after this, Mr. John Wesley came to Rradforth, 
 and preached on, "This one thing I do." He joined seve- 
 ral of us together in a class, which met about a mile 
 from the town. But all of them fell back, and left me 
 alone; yet afterwards some of them returned. Before this, 
 J thought my hill was so strong. I could never be moved. 
 But seeing so many fall into sin, I began to see danger in 
 my way. I began to feel an evil heart of unbelief, and was 
 fully convinced, that there must, be a farther change in my 
 heart, before I could be established in grace. Afterwards 
 I removed to Kighley, and had many opportunities of 
 hearing, and profiting by Mr. Grimshaw. But feeling my 
 corruptions, with strong temptations, I fell into great doubt- 
 ings. I was almost in despair, full of unbelief. I could 
 scarce pray at all. I was in this state near half a year, 
 finding no comfort in any thing. But one evening, one of 
 our friends prayed in the society, and my soul was set at 
 liberty. AH my doubts fled away, and faith and love once 
 more sprung up in my heart.' 1 afterward saw, that God 
 bad a farther end in these trials and deliverances. 
 
 Not long after this. I felt a great desire to tell others 
 What God had done for my soul. I wanted my fellow crear
 
 MR. THOMAS MITCHELL. 23? 
 
 tures to turn to the Lord, but saw myself utterly unfit to 
 speak for him. 1 saw the neigbourhood, in which 1 lived,' 
 abounding with all manner of wickedness. And no man 
 caring for his soul, or warning him to flee from the 
 wrath to come. 1 began to reprove sin wherever I was, 
 though many hated me for so doing. 1 did not regard 
 that: for God gave me an invincible courage. But still I 
 did not see clearly, whether I was called to speak i»i pub- 
 lic, or not. After many reasonings in my mind. I ventu- 
 red to give notice of a meeting. When the time came, 
 my soul was bowe*' down withrrtme: my bones shook, and 
 •ne knee smote against thy other. I hail many to hear ine: 
 3ome of them heard me with pain, and advised me to speak 
 no more in public. But one young woman was convinced 
 other lost condition, and never rested till she found re- 
 demption. 
 
 But this did not satisfy my friends. So, as they were 
 not willing to receive me. I went to those that would; and 
 God began to bless my weak endeavours. Vet 1 was not 
 satisfied myself, For several we^ks 1 had great trouble 
 in my mind. 1 thought no man's case was like mine — 
 Sometimes 1 wished 1 had never been born. Most of my 
 friends were against me. I was full of fears within, and 
 had a persecuting world without. But all this time hit 
 heart was drawn out in prayer, that God would shew me 
 the way wherein I should <ro. Being now employed at sir 
 "Walter Coverly's in the parish of Guisely. I met with a 
 few serious people at Yeadon. They were just setting 
 out in the ways of God, and desired me to give a word of 
 exhortation among them I did so a few times, and God 
 was pleased to bless it to their souls. The little society 
 increased, and they all dearly loved one another. But 
 satan was not idle. Every time we met, a riotous mob 
 gathered round the house, and disturbed us much. 
 
 One evenin.,, while William Darney was preaching, the 
 curate of Gui-»ely came at the head of a large mob, who 
 threw eggs in his face, pulled him down, dragged him out 
 ©f the house on the ground, and stamped upon him. The 
 curate himself then thought it was enough, and bade them 
 let him alone, and go their way. Some time after, Jon - 
 than Maskew came. As soon as he began to speak, the 
 same mob came, pulled him down, and dragged him out of 
 the house. They then tore oft'his clothes, and dragged him
 
 240 EXPBttiExoE or 
 
 along upon his naked back, over the gravel and pavement. 
 When they thought they had sufficiently bruised him, 
 they let him go, add went away. With much difficulty he 
 crept to a friend's house, where they dressed his wounds, 
 and got him some clothes. It was my turn to go next. — 
 No sooner wa I at the town, than the mobcan:e, like so 
 many roaring lions. My friends advised me not to preach 
 that night; and undertook to carry me out of the town. 
 But the mob followed in a great rage, and stoned me for 
 near two miles, so that it was several weeks before 1 got 
 well of the bruises I then received. 
 
 About this time a carpenter was swearing horribly, 
 whom I calmly reproved. He immediately flew into a 
 violent passion, and having an axe in his hand, lifted it ap, 
 and swore he would cleave my head in a moment. But 
 just as he was going to strike, a man that stood by, snatch- 
 ed hold of his arm, and held him till his passion cooled. 
 At first, I felt a little fear, but it soon vanished away. 
 
 While I was working at sir Walter's, some one inform* 
 ed him, that I was a Methodist. He was much displeased, 
 saying,, "1 like him for a workman, but I hate his religion." 
 Tliis was chiefly owing to his steward, whom I had often 
 reproved for swearing. He mortally hated me on that ac- 
 count. But in a little time he was taken ill. Perceiving 
 himself worse, he sent a message for me, earnestly desiring, 
 I would come and pray with him. I went and found him 
 in an agony of conviction, crying aloud for mercy. I 
 shewed him where mercy was to be found, and then went 
 to prayer with him. While I was praying, his heart seem- 
 ed broken, and he was bathed in tears. He owned he had 
 been a grievous sinner; but he cried to God with his lat- 
 est breath, and, I believe, not in vain. 
 
 I stayed some time after in these parts, and was fully 
 employed. All the day I wrought diligently at my busi- 
 ness; in the evenings I called sinners to repentance. — 
 And now the mobs were not so furious, so that we had no 
 considerable interruption. In the mean time, I waited to 
 see, whether the Lord had any thing for me to do. I 
 make it a matter of continual prayer, that he would make 
 my way plain before me. And in a little while, 1 had 
 much more of the best work upon my hands. 1 was desir- 
 ed to give an exhortation at. a village called Hartwith. 1 
 went thither several times. Several here were deeply
 
 MK. THOMAS MITCHELL. 241 
 
 convinced of sin; and two or three soon found redemption 
 in the b'ood of Jesus, the forgiveness of sins. Afterwards 
 1 was invited to Thirsk. Here 1 found a tew hungry souls. 
 But they were as sheep without a shepherd, seldom hear- 
 ing any thing like the gospel. 1 spent two nights among 
 them. The serious people were much refreshed; some 
 were awakened and saw their danger, and cried out tor 
 mercy. 
 
 After this 1 went to Stockton, where 1 found a lively 
 people, who had beee joined in society for some time. I 
 preached several times among them with great liberty of 
 soul, and freedom of speech; and to all appearance the 
 word had much eft'ect on the hearers. Here I met with 
 Mr. Larwood, who behaved very kindly to me, and told 
 me, he hoped I should be very useful if 1 kept humble. 
 He then sent me before him to York and Le; ds, where I 
 preached and gave notice of his coming. From Leeds I 
 went to Birstal. It happened to be their preaching night. 
 John Nelson was sick in bed, so the people desired me to 
 preach, or give them a word of exhortation. According- 
 ly, I preached in the best manner I could, and the people 
 seemed well satisfied. The next day I went to High 
 Town, and preached to a large congregation in the 
 evening. 1 had much liberty in speaking, and found a 
 great blessing to my own soul; and I have reason to be» 
 lieve that the people were well satisfied. 
 
 From Birstal I went to Heptonstol. Here 1 met with 
 a lively people, who received me very kindly. I gave sev- 
 eral exhortations among them, and the word went with 
 power to many hearts. I continued some time in these 
 parts, and went to several places in Lancashire. Here 
 also I found many were auakened, and several found 
 peace with God, while I was among them. I endeavour- 
 ed to form a regular circuit in these parts, and in a little 
 time gained my point. 
 
 1 continued in these parts some time, and have reason to 
 hope that 1 was useful among them. In one place I met 
 with a mob of women, who put me into a pond of water, 
 which took me nearly over my head But by the blessi.g 
 of God, I got out safe, and walked about three miles in 
 my wet clothes, but I catched no cold. I continued some 
 time in these parts, encouraged by the example and ad- 
 vice of good Mr. Giimshaw. 
 ' 21
 
 24C EXPE1UEXCE OF 
 
 One time, Paul Greenwood and I called at his house to- 
 gether, and he gave us a very warm exhortation, which 1 
 shall ni»t soon forget. He said, "If you are sent of (sod 
 to preach the gospel, all hell will be up in arms against 
 you. Prepare for the battle, and stand fast in the j^<M»d 
 ways of God. Indeed you must not expect to ^m much 
 of tiiis world's goods by preaching the gospel. JVnat you 
 get must come through <he Devil's teeti.; and he it- ill In, id 
 it as fast as he can. I count every covetous man to be 
 one of the devd's teeth. And he will let nothing go for 
 God and his cause, but what is forced from him." 
 
 In the year 1*51,1 was stationed in Lincolnshire. I 
 found a serious people and an open dooi: but there were 
 many adversaries. This \*as far the most trying year 
 which I had ever known. But in every temptation God 
 made a way to escape, that I might be able to bear it. 
 
 On Sabb.Uh, August the 7th, 1 came to Rangale. Very 
 early in the morning I preached, as usual, at five. About 
 six, two constables came, at the head of a large mob. 
 They violently broke in upon the people, seized upon me, 
 pulled me down, and took me to a public house, where 
 they k -pt me till four in the afternoon. Then one of the 
 constables seemed to relent, and said, "1 will go to the min- 
 ister, and enquire -if him whether we may not now let 
 the poor man go?" When he came back, he said. '-They 
 were not to let me go yet." So he took me out to the mob, 
 who presently hurried me away, and threw me into a 
 pool of standing water. It took me up to the neck. Sev- 
 eral times I strove *o get out. but they pitched me in a^ain. 
 They told me 1 must go through it seven times. 1 did 
 so, and then they let me come out. When I had got 
 upon dry gound, a man stood ready with a pot full of 
 white pain — He painted me all over from head to fnot; 
 and then they carried me into the public house again. 
 Here I was kept till they had put five more of our friends 
 into the water. Then they came and took me out again, 
 and carried me to a great pond, which was railed on every 
 side, bein;; ten or twelve feet deep. Here four men took 
 ^ie by my legs? and arms, and swung me backward and for- 
 ward. For a moment I felt the flesh shrink; but it was 
 quickly gone, i gave myself up to the Lord, and was 
 content his will should be done. They swung me two or 
 three times, and then threw me as far as they could in to
 
 MR. THOMAS MITCHELL, 243 
 
 the water. The fall and the water soon took away my 
 senses, so that I felt nothing more. But some of them 
 were not willing to have me drowned. So they watched 
 till I came above water, and then catching hold of my 
 clothes with a long pole, made shift to drag me out. 
 
 I lav senseless for some time. When I came to my- 
 self, I saw only two men standing by nte. One of them 
 helped me up, and desired me to go with him. He brought 
 me to a little house, where they quickly put me to bed. 
 But [ had not Iain long, before the mob came again, pulled 
 me out of bed, carried me into the street, and swore they 
 would take away one of my limbs, if 1 would not promise 
 to come there no more I told them, "I could promise no 
 such thing." But the man that had hold <>f m\ promised 
 for me, and tooK. me back into the house, and put me to 
 bed again. 
 
 Some of- the mob then went to the minister again, to 
 know what they must do with me? He told them, "Yon 
 must take him out of the parish " So they came, and took 
 me out of bed a second time. But I had no clothes to put 
 on; my own being wet, and also covered with paint. But 
 they put an old coat ab »ut me, took me about a mile, and 
 set me upon a little hill. They then shouted three times, 
 "God save the king, and the devil take the preacher," and 
 left me. 
 
 Here they left me pennyless and friendless : for no one 
 durst come near me. And my strength was nearly gone; 
 so that I had much ado to walk, or even to standi. But 
 from the beginning to the end, my mind was in perfect 
 peace. I found no anger or resentment, but could hearti- 
 ly pray for my persecutors. But I knew not what to do, 
 or where to go. Indeed one of our friends lived three or 
 four miles oft". But I was so weak and ill, that it did not 
 seem possible for me to get so far. However, I trusted in 
 God, and set out; and at length I got to the house. The 
 family did every thing for me that was in their power: they 
 got me clothes, and whatever else was needful. I rested 
 four days with them, in which time my strength was tol- 
 erably restored. Then I went into the circuit, and (bles- 
 sed be God !) saw much fruit of my labour. In the midst 
 of persecution, many were brought to the saving know- 
 ledge of God. And as the sufferings of Christ abounded, 
 so our consolations by Christ abounded also. As to the
 
 244 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 lions at Rangdale, an appeal to the court of king's bench, 
 ma<ie both them and the minister quiet as lambs. 
 
 Coding, in December, into Lancashire, I found trials 
 of quite another kind. The pocir people were in tlie ut- 
 most confusion, like a flock of frightened sheep. J hn 
 Bennet, who before loved and reverenced Mr. Wesley 
 lor his work's sake, since he got into his new opinions, 
 hated hitn most cordially, and laboured to set all the peo- 
 ple against him. He told them in the open congregation, 
 that Mr. Wesley was a pope, and that he preached nothing 
 but popery. December the 36th, 1 met him at Bolton. I 
 desired him to preach; bur he would not. So I got up and 
 spoke as well as 1 could, though with a heavy heart. Af- 
 ter 1 had done, he met the society, and said many bitter 
 things of Mr. Wesley He then spread out his hands and 
 crfeti, "popery ! popery ! 1 will not be in connection 
 with him any more."— I could not help telling him, "the 
 spirit in which you now speak is not of God. Neither 
 are you fit for the pulpit, while you are of such a spirit." 
 While I was speaking, a woman that stood by me struck 
 me in the face with all her might. Immediately all the 
 congregation was in an uproar. So I thought it best to re- 
 tire. After, I believed it was my duty to expostulate with 
 him. But it did not avail; it seemed to me that all love was 
 departed from him. — His mind was wholly set against Mr. 
 Wesley, and against the whole Methodist doctrine and dis- 
 cipline. And he had infused his own spirit into the peo- 
 ple in many places; so that I had hard work among them, 
 but the Lord kept my soul in peace and love.— Glory be 
 unto his holy name ! 
 
 In May, 1752, 1 came to Newcastle upon Tyne, where, 
 after all the storms I had gone through, I was greatlj' re- 
 freshed among a loving, peaceable people, with whom I la- 
 boured with much satisfaction. And it pleased the Lord 
 to prosper my labour in Berwick upon Tweed, Gateshead 
 Fell, and many other places, where many sinners were 
 both convinced and converted to God. 
 
 On May 8, 1753, 1 came with Mr. Wesley from New- 
 castle to York. On the 12th, he preached to a large con- 
 gregation; and the next morning, from, "Let us come 
 boldly to the throne of grace, that we may find mercy, 
 and grace to help in time of need." I never saw a con- 
 gregation so affected. Most of the people were in tears.
 
 MR. THOMAS MITCHELL. 245 
 
 some for joy, and gome from a sense of their sins. He 
 had designed to go on to Lincolnshire. . But through the 
 importunity of the people, he consented to stay a little at 
 York, and defied me to. go in his place. 
 
 From the following conference, (at which fourteen 
 preachers were present, besides Mr. Wpsley and his 
 bi other) 1 went into Wiltshire, where M-. Pearce, of 
 B<adfo<th, was a father to me. Here I formed a firm re- 
 solution of cleaving more closely to God than ever 1 had 
 done before. I longed to be wholly freed from the enemies 
 which 1 carried in my own bosom. 1 saw no other could 
 possibly hurt me, if I could but conquer myself. 1 read 
 the Bible much and prayed much, and found man) bles- 
 sings from the Lord. And 1 found in particular an entire 
 disengagement from all earthly things. Mv soul was 
 even as a weaned child. 1 was willing to be any thing 
 or n itning. 1 had n<> desire for any thing in this world, 
 but to live unto the glory of G »d. " Oh how easy does it 
 make every thing, when we c;.n give up all for Christ ! 
 
 After 1 had spent, some lime in Devonshi-e and Corn- 
 vail, I was sent for up to London. Here I had a fever 
 for some time. When 1 was piety well recovered. Mr. 
 Wesley desired me to go down to N .wich. I was not 
 well upon toe road, but was abundantly worse when I 
 came thither. But following the advice of a skilful man, 
 1 was, in a while restored to perfect health and strength. 
 Here I found much comfort among a poor but a \ery lo- 
 ving people. 1 was here (putting the first and the second 
 time together) about four years. But in the latter part 
 of this time I had many trials from J. Wheatley's people. 
 Mr. Wesley had been prevailed upon to take the taber- 
 nacle, and to , eceive his people under his are. Woe.it- 
 ley used to call tneiu "his dear lambs," but such lion like 
 la nbs did I uever see. Discipline they knew, nothing of: 
 e\eiy one would do what was right in his* own eyes! 
 And our doctrine was an abomination to then. Great 
 part of them were grounded in Antinomianism The 
 very sound of Perfection they abhorred; they could hard- 
 ly hear the word Holiness. Nothing was pleasin« to 
 the o, but "faith, 'aith;" without a word either of its in- 
 ward or outward fruits. 
 
 between the first and second time of mv being at Nor- 
 wich, 1 spent some time in Sussex. The first place that 
 21 * .
 
 £46 EXPERIENCE OP 
 
 I preached at was Rye, where no Methodist had ever 
 preached before. Yet there was no opposition, but they 
 received the word with joy and readiness of mind. And 
 many soon felt the burden of their sins, several of whom 
 quickly found peace with G* d. Mo«t of these very wil- 
 lingly joined together in a little society. Some of them 
 are lodged in \brahani's bosom; and others still remain 
 walking in the way to Zion. 
 
 Hence I went to several country places. But they 
 were not all so peaceable as Rye. At the desire of a se- 
 rious man, I went to Hawkhurst — he had requested me 
 to preach at his own house. About six in the evening I 
 began; but I had not spoke many words, before a numer- 
 ous mob broke in, pulled me down from the place where 
 1 stood, and forced me out of the house. Then they struck 
 up my heels, and dragged me upon my back about half a 
 mile, to a public house, called Highgate, where 1 found 
 many gentlemen, with the minister of the parish. They 
 asked me, by what authority do you preach? I answered, 
 by the authority of king George — and shewed them my 
 license. They spoke a little together, and said, "You 
 may go about your business." But observing the house 
 was filled with a drunken mob, I said, "gentlemen, 1 will 
 not go, unless I have a constable to guard me." They 
 immediately sent for a constable, who guarded me to the 
 house from whence I came. But as it was winter time, 
 and the road very dirty, 1 was in a poor condition; being 
 a good deal bruised, and my clothes all plastered over 
 with dirt. However, after 1 had got some dry clothes 
 and taken a little refreshment, 1 prayed with the family, 
 and then God gave me quiet and refreshing sleep. When 
 1 came to London, 1 applied to a lawyer, who sent down 
 writs for five of the ringleaders. But they quickly came 
 to an agreement. They readily paid all the char- 
 ges. And here ended our persecution in Susses. 1 found 
 a thankful heart for a good king, good law^ and liberty 
 «f conscience. And about this time 1 had much of the pre- 
 sence of the Lord: he was good to me, both a- to my body 
 and soul. 1 prayed much, and the Lord heard me, and 
 delivered me from all my fears. 
 
 In Augu>t, 1778, 1 was stationed in Staffordshire* 
 where 1 spent the year with much satisfaction. I now 
 ?oek back on the labor of three and thirty years, and 1 do
 
 irfR. THOMA3 MITCHELL, 247 
 
 uot repent of it. 1 am not grown weary either of my mas- 
 ter or the work 1 am engaged in. Though 1 am weak in 
 body, and in the decline of life, my heart is still tngaged 
 in the cause of God. 1 am nevermore happy than when 
 1 feel the love of Christ in my heart, and am declaring 
 his praise to others. There is nothing like the love of 
 Christ in the heart, to make us holy and happy. It is love 
 alone that expels all sin out of the heart. Wherever love 
 is wanting, there is hell: and where love fills the heart, 
 there is heaven. This has been a medicine to me ever 
 since 1 set out. When 1 was low, it was this that raised 
 me up. When sin and satan beset me on every side, it 
 was this that drove them all away. 
 
 "O love, how cheering is thy ray! 
 
 "All pain before thy presence flies; 
 "Care, anguish, sorrow, melt away. 
 
 "Where'er thy healing beams arise. 
 "O Jesus, nothing may I see, , 
 
 "Nothing hear, feel, or think but thee." 
 
 THE EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 I WAS born in the year 1736, in the parish of Quin- 
 ton, in the county of Gloucester. My father dying 
 while 1 was young, lef< a widow and five children. At 
 thirteen years old 1 wa> bo.md apprentice, and served 
 for eight years. 1 was never heard, during this time, to 
 swear a vain oath, nor was ever given t<> lyinjjj, gaming, 
 drunkeness, or any other presumptuous sin, but was 
 commended for my honesty and sobriety And f om my 
 childhood I had, at time-, serious thoughts on death and 
 eternity 
 
 I seived the greatest part of my apprenticeship at 
 Darlaston, in Staffordshire. Bui at the age of twenty-
 
 248 EX1T.RIF.V0E OP 
 
 one. I removed fiom thence to Wodnevburv.— More I 
 found myself in Continual dangei el loving the* little re- 
 ligion l , ..iii; .1- the family in which 1 lived had no r*-l i - 
 gion at all. Therefore I took the first opportunity that 
 offered, of removing to anothei place. And a kind provi- 
 deuce dfrected me to a family, that feared God, and 
 wrought righteousneea. 
 
 1 soon went with them to hear the Methodists, which 1 
 did with dee[i altentiou: and when the preacliei was de- 
 tcribing the tail of man, 1 thought he spoke to me in 
 particular! and spoke an il he had known e\ery thing 
 that \\a> in mv heart. When he dt-suibed the nature 
 ami fruits of faith, 1 wa* conscious I had it not; and 
 ti ougb 1 believed all the scripture tube ol God, yet I had 
 not the marks of a Christian believer, .vud I was con- 
 vinced, that if I died in the stale wheiein 1 then wa«, 1 
 should be miserable forevei. Vet I omld not conceive, 
 how I, that had lived so sober a life, c-ulii be tiie chief of 
 sinners. Hit ihis wa-. not l>»ng: h>r I no sooner discover- 
 ed the spirituality of tlie law, and the enmity that was in 
 my heart against God, dun I could heartily agree 'o it. 
 
 The thoughts of death and judgment now struck me 
 with terrible fea> . I had a keen apprehension uf the 
 wrath of God, and the fiery indignation due u> dinners; 
 so that I coual ha- e wished myself annihilated, or to be 
 the vilest creatuie, if 1 could bur. escape judgment. In 
 tlii-. «tate I was, when one told me, ■'! know G d, for 
 Cini^t's sake, has forgiven all my »uis: and his spirit vit- 
 Hesseth with my spi.it, that i am a cnild of God." This 
 gave me a good deal .it encouragement. And 1 determin- 
 ed ne\er to rest, until 1 nad a testimony in myself, that 
 my sins also were forgiven. But in the mean time, such 
 was the darkness 1 was in, such my consciousness of guilt, 
 and the just dispjeasuie of Almighty God, tnat i Co.. id 
 find no e t day or night, eiihe. for s..ul or body. So 
 th:t r life was a burden, and I became regaiditss of all 
 things under the sun. Now ah my virtue?, wnich I had 
 Some i eliance on once, appeared a-> filthy rags. And ra- 
 lly discouraging thoughts were put into my mind: as, 
 "Many a. e called; but few chosen. Han not the potter 
 powe> over his own clay, to make <>ne vessel to honour, 
 and an 'her to dishou.im?" From which it was -.ug^est- 
 ed to me, that 1 was made to dishonour, and so must in- 
 evitably perish.
 
 MR. RICHARD WHATOOAT. 249 
 
 On September S, '758, being overwhelmed with guilt 
 and fear, as 1 wns reading, it was as if one whispered to 
 me, '-Thou hads' beter read no more: for the more thou 
 read est the more thou wilt know. And be tbat knowetli 
 hi- Lord's will and doeth it not, shall b'- beaten with many 
 Stirpes." 1 paused a little, arid then resolved, let the 
 consequence be what it may, I will proceed. When 
 I came to those words, "The spirit itself beareth witnes9 
 with our spirits, that we are the child, en of God;" as I 
 fixt my eyes upon them, in a moment my darkness was 
 removed, and the spirit did bear witness with my Spirit, 
 thai I was a child of God. In the same instant fwaa fil- 
 led with un-peakable peace, and joy in believing: and all 
 fear of dentil, judgment and hell, suddenly vanished 
 away. Before this 1 was kept awake by anguish and fear, 
 so that 1 could not get an houis sound *leep in a night. 
 Now I wanted not sleep, being abundantly refreshed by 
 contemplating the rich .lisplay of God\ mercy in adopt- 
 ing so unwoithy a creature as me to be an heir of the 
 kingdom of heaven ! 
 
 This peace and joy continued about three weeks, after 
 which it was suggested to me, "Hast riot thou deceived 
 thyself? Is it not presumption, to think thou art a child 
 of God? But if thou art, thou wilt soon tall away: thou 
 wilt not endure to the end." This threw me into great 
 heaviness: but it did not continue long. For as I gave 
 myself unto prayer, and to reading and hearing the word 
 of God at all opportunities, my evidence became clearer 
 and clearer, my faith and love stronger and stronger. 
 And 1 found the accomplishment of that promise, "They 
 that wait upon the Lord, shall renew their strength." 
 
 Vet 1 soon found, that though 1 was justified freely, I 
 was not wholly sanctified. This brought me into a deep 
 concern, and confirmed my resolution, to admit of no 
 peace; no, nor truce with the evils which 1 still found in 
 my heart. I was sensible both that they hindered me at 
 present in all my holy exercises, and that 1 could not en- 
 ter into the joy of my Lord; unless they were all rooted 
 out. These considerations led me to consider more at- 
 tentively the exceeding great and precious promises, 
 whereby we may escape all the corruption that is in the 
 world, and be made partakers of the divine naiure. I 
 was much confirmed in my hope of their accomplishment,
 
 250 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 by frequently hearing Mr. Mather speak upon the sub- 
 ject. 1 saw it was the mere gift of God; and conse- 
 quently to be received by faith. And after many sharp 
 and painful conflict*, and many gracious visitations, on 
 March 28, 1761, my spirit was drawn out and engaged in 
 wrestling with God for about two hours, in a manner 1 
 never knew before. Suddenly I was stripped of all but 
 love. I was all love and prayer and prai-e. And in this 
 happy state, rejoicing eveimore, and in every thing giv- 
 ing thanks. 1 continued for some year*; wanting nothing 
 for soul or body, m re than I received from day to day. 
 
 I be»;an to Io< k round, and to observe more than ever, 
 the whole world full of sin and misery. 1 felt a strong 
 desire for others to partake of the same happiness with 
 myself. I longed t» declare unto them what I knew of 
 our Savioui. But 1 not »at down to count the cost, and 
 being then fully convinced of my duty, 1 began to exhort 
 those of the neighbouring towns, to repent and believe 
 the gospel. Thi> I did for about a year and a half; but 
 was still convinced, I might be more useful as a travel- 
 ling preacher, "i hi> I n.e. ioned to Mr. Pawso.i, a little 
 before conference, in 1"59. A little after it, he wrote 
 and let me know, that ' c hail proposed me at the confer- 
 ence, and that 1 was accepted as a probationer, and sta- 
 tioned in the Oxfordshire circuit. Having settled my 
 temporal affairs, with all the expedition I could, I went 
 into the circuit, and was received far better than I ex- 
 pected. And I found fiat affection for the people, which 
 never since wore off. Afier spending some time very 
 agreeably there, I believe to our mutual satisfaction. 1 re- 
 moved to Bedford circuit, where 1 remained till the con- 
 ference in 1774. 
 
 I was then appointed for Inniskillen clicuit, in the 
 North ot Ireland. This was a trial to me on several ac- 
 counts. I was an utter stranger to Ireland, of which I 
 had heard little spoken: 1 hat! a great aversion to sea voya- 
 ge-. And what troubled me more than all was, that my 
 mother was on her dying bed. But she knew and loved 
 the work 1 was engaged in. So she willingly gave me up 
 to the Lord, though she did not expect to see me any 
 more, till we met in eternity. In this circuit I found ma- 
 ny things that were not pleasing to flesh and blood. It 
 took us eight weeks to go through it; and in this time we
 
 MR. niCHAIlD WHATCOAT. 251 
 
 slept in near fifty places, some cold enough, some damp 
 enough; and others not -e: y ciean. Wecomnvmly preach- 
 ed two or three dnesadav besides meeting the societies 
 andvi-iting the sick: aud very frequently we had n • other 
 fo d fhati potatoes and a little salt meat. By trtis means, 
 as my c.i stitation was but weak, my strength was neat ly 
 exhausted. But it was an ample amends, to see that uie 
 work of the Lord prospered in our hands. Upward* oftwo 
 hund'ed members were thi- year added totiie »ociet»; a 
 great part of whom had found redemption through the 
 bl"od of the covenant. And I was entirely willing to 
 Aveai out my body in so blessed a « >rk. 
 
 But 1 was Mion cut short; for before I got into the next 
 circuit where 1 was stationed, namely, that of Armagh, 
 my labour was at an end; my body quite sunk under me. 
 I was taken with an entire loss of appetite, a violet t 
 bleeding at the nose, and profuse night-sweats, so that 
 my flesh was consumed from my bones, and my eyes sunk 
 in my head, my sight so failed me, s • that I could not dis- 
 tinguish my most intimate acquaintance the breadtn of a 
 room. But although my life was quite despai- ed of, yet it 
 pleased Go i to raise me up: aud aftei a confinement of 
 tweUe weeks at Sydare. I removed into Armagh circuit. 
 But going out before 1 had sufficiently recove-ed my 
 strength, the cold seized upon me, and caused such * hu- " 
 mour to >ettle in my leg> that for some time 1 could not 
 set my feet to the ground. B it my mind being set up n 
 my work, 1 little tegaided the pain of my bodv, s;> lo g 
 as 1 was able to sit tin my horse, or stand and -peak 'o Ke 
 people. S ■» So abott a fortnight I went into my circ it 
 again: but in a fortnight more 1 was again disabled the 
 humour returning so violently, that 1 was laid up for 
 eight weeks. But the-e afflictions weie not grievous: 
 they were all sweetened by the peace of God which 1 en- 
 joyed, and the exceeding kindnes-. of my friends where 
 1 was. Lord remember them fo good! 
 
 By my re-pite from preaching, while 1 travelled to 
 Dublin, and afterwards to London, and by the frequent 
 use of bathing, both in salt, and in fresh waer.l gradual- 
 ly recoveied my health. A:sd I have great reason to lile-B 
 God, who has pieseivedme during the eleven years. that 
 1 have been aa itinerant preacher, lu this time he has
 
 252 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 delivered me from many troubles, both of body and mind. 
 He has enabled me to persevere in iny labour, with a sin- 
 gle eye.— lie has kept my heart disengaged from all crea- 
 ture loves, and all desire of worldly happiness. And I 
 can still^ruly say, 
 
 "Rlcst with the scorn of finite good, 
 "My soul is lighted of her load; 
 "And seeks the things above." 
 
 With the same work, and in (he same spirit may I fill 
 up the remnant of my day*! Then may I join the choirs 
 around theone, and give blessing, and glory, and wisdom, 
 and thanks^i'iog, and honour, and p >wer, and might, 
 anto God and the Lamb for ever and ever! 
 
 THE EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 I WAS born in London, September 22, 1759. My 
 mother being pregnant with me. heard the first sermon 
 which Mr. Wesley preached at the Foundery. Soon af- 
 ter, she found peace with God, and walked worthy of the 
 gospel to the day of her death, having been a member of 
 the society upward* of thirty years. 
 
 I had the first part of my education at the Foundery 
 school, so that I was earlv instructed in the principles of 
 religion. But I was no better than if I had not been in- 
 structed at all; for God wa f not in all my thoughts. Be- 
 tween thirteen and fourteen I was put apprentice to a 
 man who had some degree of the (ear of God. For about 
 three years he was able to manage me; but afterwards I 
 neither regarded the threatening* of my mastei, nor the 
 counsels of an aflfec'iona'te mother; but ran on in my own 
 wavs. When my apprenticeship was out, I wa« for ten 
 years a faithful servant of the devii. But for the last 
 two years, I was very far from being a willing captivei
 
 5IH. WILLIAM aREEN". 253 
 
 oae hour praying against sin, the next falling into it. I 
 could truly say, "The good that I would, I do not; but the 
 evil which I would not, that 1 do." 
 
 About Julv, 1770, a person lent me one of Mr. Wes- 
 ley's journals. I read it with prayers and tear$ seeing 
 much beauty in being persecuted for righteousness 
 sake. Soon after, I read bishop Taylor's Rules tor holy- 
 living and dying: one passage struck me much: "A true 
 lover of God is more grieved on account of an impure 
 dream, than one who does not love him is, on account of 
 a gross outwaid sin." And it put me upon praying ear- 
 nestly, that God would give me his love. 
 
 In August following, Mr. Wesley coming to town, I 
 went with eagerness to hear him. His text was, "My 
 son give me thy heart." But he shot over my head; I un- 
 derstood nothing about it. However, I went in the even- 
 ing to Moorfields, and heard Mr. Murlin preach; and 
 there it pleased God to touch my heart. I went directly- 
 home, greatly affected: so that my wife, though a seriou9 
 woman, could not imagine what was the matter with me. 
 But these impressions wore oft', and I still continued a 
 slave to gaming, my besetting sin; However, I continued 
 to hear on sabbaths, arid was much pleased with what I 
 heard. And after a time, my dear mother, by much per- 
 suasion, prevailed upon me to meet in a class. From this 
 time my chains began to fall off. I think I had not met 
 above three times, before all my outward sins left me, and 
 1 shook off all my old companions. 
 
 I was now a close attendant on all the m°ans of grace. 
 I clearly saw that I was a fallen spit it; and 1 as clearly saw ? 
 that religion was to restore me to that image ofGud from 
 which 1 fell. It was now the fear of God took place in 
 my soul. But in this 1 was greatly mistaken; 1 thought 
 myself a good believer; whereas 1 was then as ignorant of 
 the nature of faith as 1 am now of Greek. Soon after 1 
 heard Mr. Wesley preach on "Believe in the LordJesu9 
 Christ, and thou shait be slaved. " I listened very atten- 
 tively; but still could not find out what faith was. 
 
 The same evening I went to Mr. Maxfield's chapel. He 
 was preaching upon the same text. He said "Faith is a 
 divine convictiou that Christ died for me." But I found 
 I could no more give myself this conviction, than 1 could 
 make a world. It was now the Holv Ghost convinced 
 22
 
 254 EXPERIENCE Of 
 
 me of sin, because 1 believed not in Jesus. 1 went home 
 in deep heaviness, and told my wife, I was an unbeliev- 
 er, and that if 1 died as 1 was, I should go to hell. 1 was 
 utterly slain by those words, '-He that believeth not, 
 shall be damned." For want of this conviction of unbe- 
 lief, how many thousands stop short of saving faith. 
 
 But though I was so fully convinced of sin, 1 was so 
 far from heiog discouraged, that 1 was all hope; knowing 
 that if all the sins of the world were upon me, the mer- 
 cies of God infinitely surpassed them all. 
 
 About Christmas I went to hear the Letters read. One 
 of which gave an account of a wonderful work among the 
 children at Kingswood, some of whom were determined 
 not to eat or sleep till they knew their sins were forgiv- 
 en. I went home full of the spirit ef mourning, and yet 
 big with earnest expectation. The next day my sorrow 
 was so great, that I could not work: till, upon praying 
 with a friend, the cloud began to disperse, and a light 
 broke into my soul. But 1 was detero'ined not to be sa- 
 tisfied with any thing short of an assurance of pardon. 
 In this situation of mind 1 went to bed — about two o'clock 
 the nest morning, December 30, 1770, I was awakened 
 by a full sense of the love of God. The skies poured 
 down righteousness into my soul, and I could Doldly say,. 
 
 "For me, I now believe he died ! 
 "He made my every crime his own.** 
 
 I was now happy in God; his spirit bearing witness 
 with my spirit, that 1 was a child of God. But about 
 three days after, 1 was sorely tempted; and a thought 
 striking my mind, that 1 was to be a prracher, this put 
 me upon many reasonings, which strenghtened the tempt- 
 ation. I believe the thought was from God: yet, for six 
 weeks 1 was greatly perplexed. However, 1 never lost, 
 for one moment, the sense of my acceptance. Yea, and 
 I knew the work of the spirit was going on, and felt the 
 blessedness of enduring temptation. 
 
 Being at Spitalfields on sabbath, 1 was greatly strength- 
 ened while those words were singing, 
 
 "Ev'n now the Lord doth pour 
 
 "His blessings from above; 
 "A kindly gracious show 'r 
 "Ot heart-reviving love: 
 "The former and the latter rain, 
 "The love of (iod and love of man.*
 
 MR. WILLIAM GREEN, 255 
 
 My faith was strengthened; my peace flowed like a riv- 
 er, and 1 had a clearer view of a crucified Saviour. About 
 this time a hymn-book of Mr. Charles Wesley's fell into 
 my hands, which speaks largely and particularly con- 
 cerning entire sanctification. I read it with attention, 
 and comparing it with the scripture, a fair prospect open- 
 ed to my view. At the same time I saw my vast distance 
 from it, in a manner I never did before. And yet 1 want- 
 ed to see it more, and could not bow my knew, but words 
 to this purpose flawed from my lips, 
 
 "Shew me, as my soul can bear, 
 
 "The depth of iobred sin; 
 "All the unbelief declare, 
 
 "The pride that lurks within." 
 
 My prayer was answered: 1 had a surprising view of 
 the total sinfulness of my heart. 1 knew this discovery 
 was from God. 1 believed it possible to be saved from 
 all sin before death. I believed it possible to be thus sav- 
 ed in a moment: and 1 believed that moment was nesr, 
 So that 1 could cheerfully sing, 
 
 "The glorious crown of righteousness 
 
 "To me reach'd out, to view; 
 "Conqueror through him, I soon shall seize 
 
 "And wear it, as my due." 
 
 In this state of mind I went to Spitalfield's chapel. 
 Mr. Wesley's text was, "Now is the day of salvation.'* 
 He addressed himself chiefly to believers. 1 found 1 was 
 ene to whom this word of salvation was sent. An inex- 
 pressible hunger and thirst after full salvation took place 
 in my soul. — And 1 thought, surely 1 shall be filled there- 
 with. But, the question is, when ? The answer was, 
 If thou canst believe, now is the day of salvation. And 
 I was clearly convinced of unbelief, as 1 was before my 
 justification. God told me his time was now. Unbelief 
 told me, it was not now. O the wickedness of a heart; 
 that is but partly renewed in the image of God! 
 
 As 1 formerly felt that I only wanted faith, in order to 
 be justified, so 1 now felt, that I only wanted faith, in 
 order to be sanctified. But 1 knew, every one that ask- 
 eth, receiveth. I therefore gave myself to prayer, nothing 
 doubting but God would answer. For two days 1 pray- 
 ed continually. I prayed in my shop: I prayed in the 
 Street: 1 prayed rising up: I prayed lying down. The 
 Lord heard and answered me. At the end of two days,
 
 25Q :.xpemekce cfc 
 
 it seemed as if my strength failed me, and! could only say 
 "Lord I will believe; help thou my unbelief!'' I was en- 
 abled to bring the words to the present moment. I felt 
 that faith which bringeth salvation, and rejoiced with 
 joy unspeakable and full of glory. In that moment I was 
 as clearly saved from sin, as ever 1 was justified. And 
 this blessing was bestowed upon me, only eight weeks 
 after the former. «. 
 
 Surely when God gives any blessing, it is his will that 
 we should keep it. But 1 did not keep this long. I fan- 
 cied, because I had much love, 1 had much knowledge, 
 and that, therefore, few could teach me. 1 forgot that I 
 had need every moment of the intercession of Christ. 
 And 1 fixt my own meaning on several texts of scrip- 
 ture, which exposed me to a flood of enthusiasm. This 
 brought on some loving opposition from my brethren, 
 which was not always received in the spirit of meekness. 
 \nd I sunk lower and lower, till I had no longer any pre- 
 tence to perfect love. Hut, notwithstanding my great 
 unfaithfulness, God did not wholly withdraw himself 
 from me. I still retained a gense of acceptance, which 
 lodged 1 have not lost an hour since 1 first received it 
 But yet I sensibly felt, that it is an evil and a bitter 
 thin^, to sin against God. My natural tempers again 
 prevailed, and i cou:a not Keep tny sen irom moi». i was 
 barely kept from outward sin. And this, 1 knew, was 
 not my own strength. 
 
 Toward the latter end of the year 1774 it pleased God 
 to stir me up anew. I was deeply convinced of my falk 
 I again felt foolish desires, the fear of man, and various 
 other evils in my heart. And 1 could truly say, 
 
 " 'Tis worse than death my God to love, 
 
 •* And not my God alone!" 
 
 'Till that memorable day, December 12, 1774; yea, on 
 the former part of that day, 1 was torn by unruly pas- 
 sions, by the love of the world, and a train of evils. Yet 
 in the midst of all 1 poured out my soul to God in much 
 prayer. In the midst of all a thought sprung up, "I will 
 go to the tabernacle." I went, being still in the spirit of 
 prayer. — Mr. Joss preached from part of the fourth chap- 
 ter to the Romans. Although 1 could not agree with him 
 that "all believers are staggerer^" yet his preaching so 
 "much below my experience, was sanctified to me. I look-
 
 MR. WILLIAM GREEN. 257 
 
 ed to God, and the spirit of supplication was poured into 
 my soul. I was athirst for God, 1 opened my mouth, 
 wide, and indeed he filled it. He spoke to my heart, "I 
 will cleanse thee from all thy filthiness and from all thine 
 idols." These words passed my mind several times, be- 
 fore 1 attended to them. At length I started and thought, 
 surely this is the voice of God to my soul. I determin- 
 ed to'hnld the promise fast, though satan endeavored to 
 tear it from me. This was about the middle of the ser- 
 mon, the latter part of which was made very useful to 
 me, the spirit of God applying it in a higher sense than 
 the preacher intended it I went home, praying all the 
 way, my whole attention being fixed upon, 
 
 "The sure prophetic word of grace, 
 
 "That glimmer'd through my nature's night." - 
 
 I then felt unspeakable happiness in my deliverance. 
 But a query came, '-How will it be to-morrow?" It was 
 answered in my heart, "To-morrow shall be as this day, 
 and much more abundant." 
 
 The next morning 1 rose to the preaching with ease, 
 which before seemed an impossibility. In tne course of a 
 day there are not wanting in a family, many little trying 
 circumstances. Some temptations also to pride, to anger, 
 and to self-will, presented themselves. Butinall things 
 I was more than conqueror. The fear of man likewise 
 was removed, so that 1 could reprove, warn, and exhort 
 ever} 1 one. Meantime the promises flowed into my heart 
 without obstruction. 1 easily perceived the change was 
 universal, and felt that 1 was cleansed from all my idols, 
 and all my filthineas. And I seemed to have light equal 
 to my love; so that in one week 1 had a clearer insight in- 
 to the life of faith, than 1 had for several years. Thus 
 Jesus saves his people from their sins. 
 
 My heart being thus set at liberty, a thought which I 
 had had years before, that it was the will of God I should 
 be a preacher, returned with greater force than ever. 
 But 1 remembered, "he that believeth shall not make 
 haste," and was thoroughly willing to wait God's time. 
 I knew it was God's 'work, and his only, to make a 
 preacher of the gospel, and that the more passive 1 was, 
 the more fit 1 should be for the master's use. In this 
 peaceful frame of mind I remained, attending to the lead- 
 ing of his spirit, and the opening of his providence, till 
 S3 *
 
 258 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 not long.after, 1 went with some of our friends (o a work- 
 house, where one of them preached. As we were com- 
 ing back, one of our brethren asked me, ''Are you will- 
 ing to give them a sermon next sabbath morning?" I 
 looked upon this to be a call of Providence, and therefore 
 durst not refuse it. So 1 went and spoke to them from 
 those words, "Ask, and it shall be given you;" and 1 had 
 a testimony within, that 1 pleased God. 
 
 Not long after, being exceeding weary in body, and 
 having much business upon my hands, my spirits sunk, 
 and I thought, "How is it possible for me to work till 
 twelve o'clock at night? Besides 1 am to preach at the 
 workhouse-house in the morning." Just then the power 
 of the Highest overshadowed me, and God spoke with 
 power, "Lo! 1 am with thee always." The words point- 
 ed me at first, to the work 1 had to do the next morning. 
 But 1 thought also, should 1 not expect power now, to 
 carry me through my business? Weariness vanished 
 away, and I went on swiftly, for the grace of God car- 
 ried mc. 
 
 In the morning 1 preached as 1 had appointed: when I 
 had done, 1 thought, 1 have made a stammering piece of 
 work. But that word was immediately applied, "The 
 tongue of the stammerer 6hall speak plainly." From 
 this time 1 constantly attended the work-house; but was 
 particularly careful to keep the life of God iu my own 
 soul. I saw religion was neither more nor less than 
 the constant union of the soul with God, and used all di- 
 ligence to shun those rocks on which 1 had split before. 1 
 labored to retain a sense of the littleness of my under- 
 standing, that 1 might always be open to instruction: and 
 I depended not on my grace of gifts, but upon the Giver, 
 living by faith in the Son of God. 
 
 As to the acting in a more public manner, 1 was entire- 
 ly passive. I thought, if ever 1 do speak in public, 1 will 
 be a preacher of God's making. In this spirit 1 continu- 
 ed, till going to the Foundery, one Saturday evening, I 
 -was informed, that Mr. Wesley had appointed me to 
 preach there, the next morning. I was surprised; but I 
 thought, huw can 1 honor my spiritual Father, unless 1 do 
 what he orders me? Sol went and preached on, "The 
 JLord whom ye seek shall suddenly come to his temple.'* 
 
 For a minute after 1 had named my text, 1 trembled and
 
 MR. WILLIAM GREEN. 259 
 
 ■could hardly utter a word. But I then found help, and 
 spoke about forty minutes without any difficulty. Af- 
 terwards I preached at Bow, on, "Without holiness no 
 man shall see the Lord." And, after a few trials, I 
 was thoroughly convinced, that, provided his soul be 
 truly alive to God, the life of a preachef of the gospel is 
 the happiest life under heaven. 
 
 I was now received into the number of local preachers. 
 But 1 was fearful of putting myself forward, lest 1 should 
 run before the spirit. I never asked to preach at this or 
 the other place, receiving the appointment of the Assist- 
 ant as a call from God. How happy would it be for the 
 preachers, if they were all to follow the guidance of the 
 Spirit, rather than their own will! Then nothing would 
 come amiss. In a few months 1 preached in all the chap, 
 els in London, and when summer came on, in Mooriields, 
 Marybone fields, and on Tower-hill: all the time blessing 
 God for being kept from that false humility which shackles 
 so many! My unfitness never stood in my way. Indeed 
 I cannot but think all who are called of God to preach, 
 are some way fitted for the work; if not, the Loid of the 
 vineyard does not know hisbusines! However, sure I am, 
 that humility of this kind, is inconsistent with perfect 
 love. I believe, genuine humility makes a man invul- 
 nerable, by the praise or dispraise of men. 
 
 From this time 1 continued to preach, and to labor dili- 
 gently with my hands, that 1 might provide things honest 
 in the sight of all men, till in August, 1777, 1 was calied 
 to suffer the will of God, being about. three months under 
 a surgeon's hands; he at last pronounced the case despe- 
 rate; of which my wife informed me with tears in her eyes. 
 In that instant, three scriptures came to my mind. '"All 
 power is given to me in heaven and in earth. The things 
 impossible with men are possible with God. — The right 
 hand of the Lord hath the pre-eminence;'* and 1 was fully 
 assured 1 should not die: mean time 1 suffered the will of 
 God willingly, cheerfully, joyfully. By this illness 1 was 
 cured of another disorder, which otherwise must have 
 been my death, and was made more capable both inward- 
 ly and outwardly, of doing the work 1 was called to. 
 
 When 1 gathered strength, 1 was advised to go into the 
 ^country; and being recommended to our friends atOark- 
 ing, I spent sixteen days with them. May God repay
 
 £00 EXPERIENCE «t 
 
 tliem for the love they shewed me! When I cauie bacn. 
 I was quite capable of my business, which 1 cheerfully 
 entered upon, being equally willing to work at my trade, 
 or to preach the gospel. But in the latter end of July, 
 1780, one asking me, whether I had no thoughts of bein^ 
 a travelling preacher? I owned 1 had: and having just 
 buried two of my children, 1 thought the time was come. 
 I wa< accordingly proposed at the Bristol conference, 
 and appointed fur the Salisbury circuit. Many of my 
 prudent f. iends blamed me much for leaving a quiet, 
 comfortable bu>iness. But I had counted the cost. So 
 on Monday, September 11, 1 set out for Salisbury. 
 When 1 left my wife and three children, 1 felt a mixture 
 of joy and grief, but with a full resignation to the will 
 of God. 1 have been about fi\e months in my circuit, 
 and am more convinced, that this is the pleasantest life 
 under heaven. Though 1 have left my wife, and chil- 
 di en, and dearest friends, and house, and business, 1 wan- 
 der about, chiefly on foot, through cold and rain, 1 find 
 my mind uninterruptedly happy; I feel a constant wit- 
 ness of the work wrought in my heart by the spirit of ho- 
 liness. I have received in this world a hundred fold: 
 "and 1 know, that when my earthly house of this taber- 
 nacle is dissolved, 1 have a building of Godj a house not 
 made with hands, eternal in the heavens." 
 
 THE EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 I WAS born, May, 1736, in the Kirktown of Fortin- 
 gale, near the river Lyon, and not far from the lovely 
 banks of the '-Soft-winding Tay, 5 ' Breadalbin, Perth- 
 shire. 
 
 I claim kindred to the Stuarts, M»Donalds,and M'Gre- 
 gors families perhaps more famed in story for martial 
 exploits, than for any extraordinary attainments in reli- 
 
 gion. 
 
 It might have been better for me to have had a hardy, 
 Highland education; but of this I was deprived by the
 
 MR. DUNCAN WRIGHT. 2<jl 
 
 removal of my parents to Edinburg, when 1 was very 
 young. Here 1 had the best education my father couid 
 give me, who was my only schoolmaster; but 1 doubt, 
 knew little of the life and power of religion. Yet he 
 prayed with us at times, made us learn the assembly's 
 shorter catechism, and took care of us to the best of his 
 knowledge. I lost him earlv. which was a loss indeed! 
 For my mother being too easy and indulgent, let us have 
 our own way, which led u* to all the follies and sins we 
 were capable of. I do not remember that any creature 
 took any pains to instruct me till 1 was near twenty 
 years of age; but old lady D. of Prestun-Field, who, at 
 times, advised me as well as she could. And yet the 
 Lord did not leave me without drawings from above: for 
 having a bookish inclination, I read, and wept very often 
 till my head ached, and hardly knew what ailed me. On- 
 ly I wanted to be a Christiau, and to be easy and happy, 
 but knew not how. Had any living Christian taken a 
 little pains to inform me I doubt not but I should have 
 embraced the offers of mercy long before I did. Indeed 
 I never felt any spirit of opposition to religion and reli- 
 gious persons. For a* I had neither the form nor the 
 power of religion inyself, 1 knew I had little reason to 
 speak an unkind word of those that had any annearancp. 
 m tuner. 
 
 I was from my infancy feeble and tender: yet having 
 many relations in the &rmy, no employment would re- 
 lish with me but a soldte .: hence my mother never 
 could prevail with me to follow any regular business, 
 and this exposed me to vain and wicked company. Yet 
 having some tenderness of conscience left, repenting and 
 sinning, resolving and breaking through ray resolutions, 
 made my life a weariness indeed. So, in order to be 
 happy, I resolved to see the world in a military life. 
 Hence I enlisted the latter end of 1T54, into the tenth 
 regiment of foot. None of my friends knew what was 
 become of me, till I wrote to my mother from Limerick, 
 in Ireland. My mother being infirm, did not survive this 
 long, she died the spring following: and I fear my diso- 
 bedience hastened her departure. An awakened con- 
 science will smait, iir»t or last, for this sin, among others, 
 stubbomne-s and disobedience to parents. So did mine: 
 for the day I enlisted, I thought, now I have done for soul
 
 C&2 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 and body; for I could form no conception how a soldier 
 could be religious. 
 
 In the summer of 1755, we encamped near the city of 
 Cashel, eight regiments of foot, and two of horse, where 
 William Coventry, a corporal in the royal Scotch, fre- 
 quently preached. I heard him once, and felt nothing 
 but a kind of wonder at his courage in preaching among 
 such a set a* we were. I little thought, that in less than 
 four years, I should be engaged in the same work, in ano- 
 ther camp. 
 
 We returned to Limerick for winter quarters, where I 
 began to consider (as the soldiers had then a great deal 
 of leisure time in the v/inter) how I should pass my 
 tedious moments; I could play at cards, and other games, 
 (then common among the soldiery, but now happily sup- 
 pi essed) but I seldom liked my company. For though 
 1 could swear sometimes, yet I could not relish so much 
 of it, as they were addidted to. I therefore bought and 
 borrowed all the plays, novels, and romances I could lay 
 my hands upon: reading late and early. And my read- 
 ing had this effect at least, that it kept me out of worse 
 diversions, and gave my mind a turn above such intem- 
 perance and lewdness, as were too common among men 
 of my rank. 
 
 At last an old soldier, in the same barrack room with 
 me, iound fault with me for spending my time, and 
 spoiling my eyes in reading such trash. I thought 
 I will shew you, I can read religious books as well as 
 others. But I had none of my own. I borrowed two 
 from one of our soldiers. One of them was the "Marrow 
 of modern Divinity," which being wrote by way of dia- 
 logue, attracted by attention; and before I read it half 
 through, I was truly, though gently convinced, thatl was 
 a lost sinner, and that Christ was all 1 wanted to make 
 me easy, satisfied, and happy. 
 
 Now it was that a deep sense of my time, youth, and 
 health, spent in sin and folly; my ingratitude to God, the 
 best of fathers; my slighting of Christ so long, and griev- 
 ing the blessed Spirit, melted my heart, and made my 
 eyes a fountain of tears. — I awoke as from a dream, and 
 saw all about me, like the men of Sodom, blind and grop- 
 ing about for happiness; or asleep, with storms of wrath 
 ready to burst upon their heads. The immediate conse-
 
 MR. BUNGAN WRIGHT. S63 
 
 quence was, a distaste to all my books and diversions, t 
 exchanged them for religious tracts: and having a pray- 
 ing heart, it soon found a praying place; for as I had no 
 place of retirement in mv room, i found a covered batte- 
 ry on the castle wall. This soon became my closet; and 
 when on guard, 1 used to cover my head with my watch 
 cloak, and stopping my ears with my fingers, spent many 
 a happy moment iu converse with God, weeping and 
 making supplication. 
 
 Although I now forsook, in a sense, all for Christ, yet 
 there was, at times, such a mixture of seriousness and 
 levity, that some might conclude 1 had no tincture of the 
 fear of Gid. But my trifling in the day, made me often 
 water my couch with tears at night. But I had none to 
 guide me; 1 did not know a man, among seven hundred 
 that had any knowledge of such a work as 1 now felt in 
 my mind. 1 
 
 There was one indeed, who I thought must have some- 
 thing in him, because he was sober, and read good buoks. 
 But when I be^an to tell a little of what 1 for, I found 
 him an entire stranger to every thing of the kind. How- 
 ever; the Lord made up the want of Christian fellowship, 
 by sending me such books, from time to time, as surpri- 
 singly suited my case, particular)* Ailein's Alarm, winch, 
 proved of wonderful service to me. Among his direc- 
 tions for conversi-m, he advises the reader to enter into 
 eovenant with God; a form of which he has there given. 
 I took the advice, set apart a day of fasting and prayer, 
 wrote the covenant and signed it, and in was not long be- 
 fore the Lord shewed me he did not despise the day of 
 small thiugs. 
 
 There was a society of Methodists in the town, but I 
 knew them not; and when I did they were such objects 
 of universal contempt, that I hardly'knew what to make 
 of them; however, the last night of this year, 1 ventured 
 to go, and heard Mr. Oddie. I likewise began the year 
 3756 with them, and from that time never missed an op- 
 portunity of hearing, morning and evening. 
 
 I think it was in April this year, that the Lord justifi- 
 ed me by his grace, i used to spend all my time iu bed, 
 while awake, in weeping and prayers, and it was in one 
 of these weeping nights, that in an instant, the Lord 
 brought me out of darkness into his marvellous light. I
 
 2G4 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 did not know then what to call it; but its effects were ma- 
 ny. I found a;\ uncommon concern for the souls of the 
 soldiers, and the sight of a Methodist used to set my 
 heart on fire with l..ve. Yet for half a year, not a soul 
 of them spoke a word to me, though 1 sometimes threw 
 myself in their way. For, much did iHong to be ac- 
 quainted with them, but iny shyness was such, that 1 could 
 nut break through to speak to them. 
 
 Mr John Wesley, and Mr. Thomas Walsh, made us a 
 visit this summer; and 0, what a heaven upon earth did 
 1 feel in Hearing them ! and yet 1 could not speak to them 
 for my life. At length, that serious man, Mr. Thomas 
 Seccombe, took notice of me, and when he was about to 
 leave Limerick, desired Sidney Hoey, (a mother in Is- 
 rael she wa?> to me and many of the soldiers) to get ac- 
 quainted with me. She brought me to her house, and the 
 same day to a class-meeting, which was a day of glad- 
 ness to me; for I had often found Solomon's words ful- 
 filled, — -Woe to him that is alone when he falleth " For 
 when I fell into perplexities and temptations, I had no 
 one to help me; but now I found the real benefit of hav- 
 ing fellowship with a loving people. 
 
 Fart of 1757 and "58. I spent at Dublin, and found 
 their fellowship there also of very great service. The 
 preachers were lively, and faithful lovers of discipline. 
 The society retained much of their simplicity and teach- 
 ableness, and were in a good degree prepared for the 
 blessed revival which followed some time after, under 
 Mr. John Manners. 
 
 It was of uncommon advantage to me to be among the 
 Methodists, at a time, when both the preacher and peo- 
 ple loved all our discipline, and practised it. I saw the 
 blessed consequences; fur few cared to/ stay among us, 
 but such as retained their fervour for the whole of reli- 
 gion. False bretin en, especially, were soon tiied, and 
 went to the Independents, Anapabtists, or Moravians. 
 But with gre<tt simplicity we used to crowd to the Sa- 
 crament, at St. Patrick's, in Dublin, or the Cathedral at 
 Limei icK, gcT* Every Sabbath. These were happy times 
 to me; for although I was b' ed a Presbyterian, (if I was 
 bred any thing) yet the love of God threw down the 
 wails of partition, and made me love to be there, where 
 I found most of the people of God. 1 soon saw our
 
 MK. BUNOAN WRIGHT. 265 
 
 plan to be more noble than any poor narrow dissenting 
 scheme whatever, as intending the good of thousands and 
 tens of thousand*, in the great bodies of the established 
 churches; and 1 am still convinced, that our present sit- 
 uation is infinitely better calculated for general good 
 than the best planned separation that can be conceived. 
 What occasioned my commencing a preacher, was as 
 follows. In September, 1758, we returned to Limerick; 
 and as goverment resolved to shoot a deserter in every 
 city, in terrorem, the lot fell on a young man in our re- 
 giment to die in Limerick. — His name was Joseph New- 
 ton; he was a Derbyshire man, twenty-two years of age. 
 I longed to talk with him; but as he was kept in a public 
 guard -house, with no place of retirement, 1 could not 
 tell how to <peak to or pray with him, among so many 
 people. But when I found the adjutant had been to in- 
 form him that he must die on Monday, (this was on the 
 Tuesday before) I saw 1 had no time to lose. 1 went in, 
 and fund him weeping, as if his heart would break, and 
 reading the Whole Duty of Man with all his might: like 
 a drowning man catching at any thing to save him. I 
 spoke a few words to him then, and again in the evening, 
 though with uncommon reluctance, there being many 
 soldiers round us. I prayed with him, and found very 
 great freedom to speak to him and to all that were pre- 
 sent. He had no plea, but saw himself an undone sin- 
 ner without help, and almost without hope. Some of us 
 visited him twice or thrice a day, and on Thursday his 
 soul was set at liberty. From that time he witnessed a 
 good confession to all that spoke to him. Every one that 
 saw him go the place where he was shot, could not but 
 admire the serene joy that appeared in his countenance. 
 He said but little, but his calm, happy death made a deep 
 impiession on many of out soldiers; for they could not 
 but discern the difference between him and one they saw 
 die awhile before at Dublin, who shewed the greatest re- 
 luctance, the field officer of the day being obliged to ride 
 up to him seveial times to tell him he must die: while 
 Joseph Newton was not above ten minutes on his knees 
 before he dropt the signal, and went to Paradi>e. 
 
 1 thought, now was the time to try what could be done 
 among the soldieis. I therefore told several, that as ma- 
 ny as had a mind, might come to my room every night
 
 366 SXPER1FMCE OF 
 
 after roll calling, and I would sing, read, and pray with 
 them as well an I could. They came and crowded my 
 room, and in a little while I had a class of them. But 
 about the beginning of the year 1759, I was ordered for 
 Scotland on the recruiting service. I found this not to 
 be easy work for a Christian, yet, through mercy, i was 
 kept from outward sin. 
 
 After an absence of four months, the French being ex- 
 pected to invade Ireland, we were ordered to join the 
 regiment, which lay encamped near Kilkenny, and found 
 Bny little flock, having had no one to look after them, 
 were all scattered. The first morning we met (in a field 
 adjoining) there were but three of us. But our number in- 
 creased every time we met; and before our camp broke 
 up, I had a little society gathered again. And here it 
 was that I got the name of a preacher: for it being fre- 
 quently late in the evening before we could meet, be- 
 fore I had sung and prayed, our light was gone out, so 
 that I could not see to read, but was obliged to say some- 
 thing to them, without a book, or send them away empty. 
 
 It was well 1 did not begin to preach among very know- 
 ing men, for they might soon have silenced me, as a little 
 thing would have done it: but here there was none to hin- 
 der me but the commanding officer, and he did not choose 
 to do it. Though he did not like the Methodists, yet he 
 wanted us all to be very good, as we did not know how 
 soon our valour might be tried by the French. There- 
 fore we had very strict orders against swearing, d.un- 
 kenneas, &c. but those orders did not effect any great re- 
 formation. 
 
 When we left the camp, as we still expected an inva- 
 sion, we were scattered abroad in cantonments all over 
 the south of Ireland. This hurt such of us as were 
 weak in the faith, very much. None can tell, but such 
 as have tried, how hard it is for a soldier to stand his 
 ground among so many unreasonable, a? well as ungodly 
 men; for such were most of the officers as well as soldiers: 
 men whose tender mercies were cruel. 
 
 I had myself suffered much loss in my mind for a year, 
 and consequently had little inclination for preaching. 
 Hence when we got the route for (ialway. I was not at 
 all sorry that there was no society to solicit me to preach 
 among them. Even my friends among the officer* were
 
 MR. DUHOAW WRIGHT. 267 
 
 much concerned for me, a9 many sergeants were prefer- 
 red to commissions, they said they doubted they could 
 do nothing for me, a- 1 made myself so ridiculous. In- 
 deed this did not move me. But my unhappiness of 
 mind was the great hindrance to my preaching. Yet in 
 Gal way it was that 1 had the most clear and undoubted 
 seals to my mission, in the conviction and conversion of 
 souls who'never had heard any other Methodist preacher. 
 Some of them are a comfort to me to this day; and some 
 are fallen asleep in Jesus. 
 
 In 1761, we marched for Dublin again, and the follow- 
 in» year back to Galway. All this time, from 1758 to 
 1763, I walked in darkness, and had no light. 1 fell into 
 it by degrees: but by what particular thing, I am at a loss 
 to know. But this 1 know, my case was truly deplora- 
 ble; and yet 1 did not give way to any known sin; neither 
 did I miss any means of grace. Nay 1 often went to the 
 Lord's table, when, to all sense and feeling, 1 was as dead 
 as a stone. My gracious tears were all dried up. My 
 atony heart could not melt. And yet 1 heard the great- 
 est preachers, read the best books 1 knew, and conversed 
 or corresponded with the most gracious Christians 1 could 
 hear of. Nay, 1 frequently exhorted or preached the 
 whole time; yea, and in that season had apparent suc- 
 cess to my labours. 1 remark this, to refute an idle con- 
 ceit, that none are fit to teach others, but such as are hap- 
 py themselves. 1 know, that many times, though 1 for- 
 got it while preaching. I was as miserable as a devil, 
 both before and after. And it was often suggested to me, 
 "Judas may cast out devils, and notwithstanding all this, 
 be only an outcast." I often saw myself like one enclo- 
 sed ail around with hewn stone, my strength and my 
 hope perished from the Lord. As I knew very little of 
 myself when the Lord justified me, he saw good to shew 
 me now my utter helplessness, by leading me into the 
 painful school of self knowledge. And a dull scholar I 
 proved, being five years in learning what others have 
 learned in less than five months. 
 
 Yet notwithstanding my wretchedness, our little soci- 
 ety at Galway was wonderfully blest. As there was 
 about this time a glorious revival in many parts of the 
 three kingdoms, I communicated to them, from time to 
 time, the intelligence I received of the work, and the
 
 S68 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 fire soon kindled among them also. All were happy, or 
 in earnest but me, and I durst tell very few my sad case, 
 for fear of hurting them. This was often the language 
 of my heart, 
 
 "My soul in sin so rooted stands, 
 
 "No common miracle can move, 
 "I know my Spirit's cure demands 
 
 Thy whole Omnipotence of love. 
 
 "But whether thou hast ever heal'd 
 
 "A Spirit so desperate as mine, 
 "It lies, alas, from me conceal'd, 
 
 "In lowest depths of love divine." 
 
 If it be asked, what could induce me to continue in the 
 means of grace? I answer, 1 never doubted my former 
 experience of the truth and reality of religion; and (be- 
 sides an unseen hand that upheld me) ! retained a full 
 conviction, that in the favour of God alone there was life 
 and happiness. So 1 was determined to be happy in the 
 favour of God, or refuse every other comfort. 
 
 It was when 1 was thus in darkness, and in the deep, 
 that the Lord, in a moment, restored to me the joy of 
 his salvation. This was like a plenteous shower, upon a 
 parched and dry land, that soon made my soul like a wa- 
 tered garden. The Lord now led me into green pas- 
 tures, beside the still waters." — What a change was this! 
 The soul that was before, all tumult and confusion, was 
 now all joy and peace through believing. This was about 
 June, 1763. 
 
 And yet I soon found 1 had not attained what J. Dillon 
 and S. Hoey. informed me they had attained, viz. "A 
 mind constantly staid upon God, and kept in perfect 
 peace." 
 
 Being about this time confined to my room, by a vio- 
 lent inflammation in my cheek, my pain made me pray 
 the more earnestly, that the peace of God might keep my 
 heart and mind also. The Lord heard, and gave me a 
 glorious answer. I felt such a sudden, and such a change, 
 as I never before conceived possible. My joy was indeed, 
 unspeakable; my hope full of immortality; and, my peace 
 flowed like a river. I then understo »d those words as I 
 never did before, We all, with open face, beholding as in
 
 MR. DUNCAN WRIGHT. 
 
 269 
 
 a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same 
 image, tiom glory to glory, even as by the spirit ot the 
 Lord. 
 
 Just then we were ordered to the north of Ireland, to 
 quell a set of rioters, called Hearts ofOak. Being some- 
 thing better, 1 marched on till we came to Carrick on 
 Shannon, when our surgeon told me I must go no farther, 
 at the peril of my life. My excessive pain, aud the be- 
 ing left behind, would at some other time, have tried me 
 sufficiently: but now, 
 
 "All was calm, and joy, and peace " 
 
 And here it was that I fiist understood, how the bless- 
 ed martyrs could clap their hands in the flames; for al- 
 though for some nights my pain was excruciating, yet all 
 was tranquility within. 
 
 The little society here, and the M'Neily's family in 
 particular, took remarkable care of roe. The Lord grant 
 they may find mercy of him in that day. This state 
 continued several months; but having none to direct me, 
 and not being sufficiently aware of the need there was for 
 constant watchfulness and prayer, 1 fell, by degrees, from 
 that heaven of love. 
 
 In the beginning of 1764, 1 was called to suffer a little 
 for the testimony of Jesus. And, indeed, but a little; for 
 what were a few threatenings, a little reproach and 
 shame, a few stones, or rotten eggs, to what many of the 
 dear servants of God have suffered, even in this age? 
 
 Our lieutenant«c>donel did not care what a soldier's 
 religion was, provided he did his duty; but our major, a 
 warm blunderer, to whom the command of the regiment 
 was left for a time, thought it a disgrace to have a ser- 
 geant a preacher among them. He therefore resolved 
 to drive me out of preaching if possible. I shall not en- 
 ter upon a detail of the several means he u«ed for this 
 purpose, as I believe he was ashamed of them himself 
 before I left him. He found me so much the soldier, 
 however, as not to be frightened out of what 1 thought 
 was my duty. Yet I found it no easy matter to walk 
 the streets of Newry, a gazing stock to both old and 
 young. At last, as he found he could not prevent my 
 preaching, he hit upon a method to get quit of me: name- 
 ly, to put me into the tenth company, which was soon to 
 be reduced. And thus it was that the Lord ^hrustme 
 23 *
 
 270 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 out into the harvest: for I was determined not to leave 
 the army, till some clear providence set me free. Before 
 the time came for the reduction of the companv, some 
 of the friendly officers wanted me to stay, and said they 
 Mould get the major to put some old sergeant in my 
 place. I begged thej would not, and they acquiesced. 
 S .me of them, indeed, wished I could persuade all tlieir 
 men to be religious, for they had no trouble with the 
 Methodist soldiers, but enough with the others. Yet tliey 
 told me. they feared what our enthusiasm would turn to: 
 and mentioned Cromwell, who could preach and pray 
 one part of the day, and kill and plunder the other. 
 
 Never were words more applicable to these fearful 
 men than the following: 
 
 "The same in your esteem, 
 
 "Falsehood and truth ye join; 
 "The wild pretender's dream, 
 
 "And real work divine: 
 "Between the substance and the show, 
 
 "No difference you can find; 
 "For colours all, full well we know, 
 
 "Are equal to the blind." 
 
 Were the chaplains men of real piety and courage, 
 much good might be done in the army; but the chaplain- 
 cy is geneially a kind of sinecure, and the care of souls 
 is left to any woithless wretch, that will do it at an ear-y 
 rate. When we lay in one city, the care of four or five 
 regiments was left to an unhappy man, who was an ob- 
 ject of common ridicule among the soldiers, for his per- 
 petual drunkenness. 
 
 But although my commanding officer could not hinder 
 me from preaching, and God gave me to see the fruit of 
 my labours, yet I was not thoroughly satisfied in my 
 own mind that it was my duty to preach; but this spring, 
 at Waterford, God revived his work wonderfully among 
 that society, and set my mind free from every scruple; 
 so that when Mr. Wesley wrote me word, that if I left 
 the army, he had immediate work for me; 1 had no objec- 
 tion but the precarious state of my health: for by preach- 
 ing loud, and long, aid by reading at all hours, I had 
 brought myself so low, that our surgeon sometimes 
 thought me in a consumption. Mr. Wesley told me in 
 answer to my objection, "that our Master had all power
 
 MR. DUNCAN WUIGHT. 271 
 
 in heaven, and in earth, and that as my day, so should my 
 strength be." And in the latter end of 1764, I found 
 myself at liberty to go where providence directed. 
 
 I was how entering upon a new scene of life, and 
 though I was twenty eight years of age, I was an utter 
 stranger to mankind: hence I imagined that blunt honesty, 
 with innocency, would bear me through any thing; but I 
 have since learned, that we need the wisdom of the ser- 
 pent, as well as the innocence of the dove, in our deal- 
 ings with men. even aboat their souls. I mention this 
 as an apology for some parts of my conduct, which had 
 not always a due mixture of calm wisdom; my native 
 impetuosity often hurrying me beyond the bounds of mo- 
 deration; a thing too common with well-meaning, zealous 
 young men. 
 
 I would observe farther, that I was kept in such watch- 
 fulness and tenderness of conscience; nine years after, 
 I knew something of religion among the soldiery, as to 
 my grief and shame I have not always retained since 
 that period. I was then continually among the open en- 
 emies of religion, which partly obliged me to vigilance, 
 but being since then chiefly among the professed friends 
 of religion, how often have I been oit' my watch! O 
 where are we safe, beyond the power of sinning, but in 
 paradise! 
 
 When I came to Dublin, our society and preachers re- 
 ceived me in the kindest manner, and a comfortable time 
 I spent with them that winter. 
 
 One of our captains, without my knowledge, now re- 
 commended me to a late nobleman, who, he told me, had 
 an easy place for me, and desired my answer in two or 
 three days. I thanked him, and told him I had chosen 
 another employment. 
 
 Heie I was acquainted with Dr. Davis, whose case is 
 worth relating. He was formerly lemarkable for a pe- 
 culiar lively turn of wit on all occasions, and happy was 
 the company that could get him to spend the evening 
 with them. But being persuaded by a friend to hear 
 John Carr, one of our local preachers; his companions, 
 alas, lo.-t their meny andtew. He told me that he went 
 to see the preacher, merely to take him off", as he express- 
 ed it: "but," said he, -'while 1 uas leaning on my cane, 
 looking at him through my fingers, during his first pray-
 
 272 EXPEUIENCE OF 
 
 cr, an arrow went to my heart, which* sent me home 
 bruised and wounded." Me then sought the true physi- 
 cian, who soon brought him to a healthful mind. 
 
 The regiment of dragoons, of which he was surgeon, 
 marched into Dublin while I was there. One day, being 
 at the soldier's infirmary, a serious man, the porter of 
 the house, one Francis May, said to him, "Sir, we want 
 prayer, and a woid of exhortation very much in this 
 house: would you pray with two or three, Sir, if I get 
 them together?" "Really Frank," said the doctor, "I 
 ne\er prayed in my life, but with tv\o nr three serious 
 people, and I know not how to begin with any other." 
 "Sir," said Frank, "it is high time you should begin: be- 
 gin to-day, Sir, begin now!" The doctor was prevailed 
 on. Awav went F<ank, and Informed them through all 
 the house, that Dr. Davis was going to preach to them. 
 Down came every soul that could crawl; the sick, the 
 the lame, and the lazy, to the long room, where the chap- 
 lains used to read prayers. Away came Frank to the 
 doctor. "Now, Sir," said he, '•! have got a few of them." 
 "When the doctor came to the room door, and saw the 
 place full, he was for going back. "Nay, Sir," said Frank, 
 "You cannot go back for your life! There they are, the 
 Lord has delivered them into your hands, and will you 
 start from his work?" In short, the doctor went in, stood 
 on a form, sung and prayed; and having his pocket bible 
 with him, he read a portion to them, discoursed an hour 
 and a half, and from that time preached to the soldiers 
 wherever he could. As 1 knew his dangerous situation, 
 1 was a little afi aid for him. But God took care of him; 
 for going to visit some prisoners in Newgate, who had a 
 malignant fever, he caught the infection, and finished his 
 course, rejoicing in God his Saviour. 
 
 We had several remarkable conversions while 1 was in 
 Ireland. One or two more may be mentioned. We often 
 think it lost labour, to talk to a man abott his soul while 
 drunk; but 1 know to the contrary. I knew one in the 
 North of Ireland, who, going home one summei evening, 
 much in liquor, saw a crowd of people on a green at some 
 distance, and imagining it to he a cock-fight, he would see 
 it before he went home. The preacher being in the ap- 
 plication of his discourse, said, "Are there any drunk- 
 ards here?" &c. The poor fellow looking up, said "Yes,
 
 MR. DUNCAN WIUGHT. 273 
 
 I am one." At that instant he was seized with such con- 
 cern for his soul, as never left him till he became a new 
 man. 
 
 1 add another remarkable case. We had a little soci- 
 ety in the county of Wexford, who used to be much pes- 
 tered with a Popish m >b. They met in a long barn, wi'h 
 the door near one end. The rabble wanted to know what 
 they did at their private meetings; but'as the barn be- 
 longed to one that was no Methodist, they durst not 
 break open the door. At length they contrived that one 
 of them should get into the barn before the people came, 
 and let his companions in at a proper time. To con- 
 ceal himself the better, he got into a sack, and lay 
 down behind the door. When the Society were all in, 
 they fastened the door as usual. Soon after came the 
 mob, hollowing and shouting to their friend to let them 
 in; but God found other work for him; for being charm- 
 ed »'jtH ■■the first hymn, he thought it a thousand pities 
 (as he afterwards said) to disturb them while singing it. 
 And when the prayer began, the power of God did so 
 confound him, that he roared out with might and main. 
 And not having power to get out'of the sack, lay bawl- 
 ing and screaming. At last one ventured to see what was 
 the matter, and helping him out, brought him up confess- 
 ing his sins and crying for mercy: which was the begin- 
 ning of a lasting work in his soul. 
 
 In the spring, there being no preacher in the Waterford 
 circuit, I went thither, and spent some time very agree- 
 ably among my former acquaintances. — And now it was 
 that I saw what spirit many of the Irish papists were of. 
 While I carried a sword by my side, few of them cared 
 to speak their minds; but now, that restraint being re- 
 moved, several of them told me to my face, that they 
 thought it would be doing both God and the church ser- 
 vice, to burn all such as me in one fire! The infatu- 
 ation of many of them, owing to the ignorance they 
 are kept in, cannot be described; for, upon the least 
 pretence, and often without any, they rise in large 
 parties, well armed, to destroy the lives and property 
 of their neighbors, oppose the magistracy, and even 
 insult the army. 
 
 About this time, a party of the light horse, being on 
 foot, were conveying one of the Whiteboys to Kilken-
 
 274 EXPERIENCE OP 
 
 dj jail. In going thiough a village, the Papists crog- 
 eed the way with a mock funeral. When they had got 
 the soldiers in the midst, they threw down their cof- 
 fin full of st mes, and fell on, old and young, with 
 the greatest fury. The soldiers defended themselves, 
 till the sergeant and three or four more were killed, 
 and several desperately wounded. For this, five of 
 them were hanged at Kilkenny — They all died "inno- 
 cent (they said) as the child unborn!" So did five 
 more, who were executed a little while before, for burn- 
 ing a mill, and burying the miller up to the neck. I 
 could not understand at first, how mo»t of the Papists 
 that die fine, by the hands of the executioner, die 
 declaring their innocency, till I found out the secret: 
 having confessed all their crimes to the priest, and 
 received his absolution, they believed themselves guilt- 
 less, and weie forbidden to make confession to the he- 
 retics. However, we had the comfort to see several 
 of them to the experience of real Chri-tianity. And 
 there is no doubt but if there were a few preachers 
 of Mr. Walsh's spirit, we should see many more. 
 
 Mr.- W r esley having signified to me, some time be- 
 fore, that I might travel with him if 1 had a mind, I 
 glaiily embraced the opportunity, and met him at Lim- 
 erick, in June, 1765. This and the next year. I had 
 an opportunity of seeing most of our large societies in 
 the three kingdoms; and had my health, capacity, and 
 industry kept pace with my opportunities, it might 
 have been a time of extraordinary improvement. Be- 
 sides all other advantages, I had constantly before me 
 such an example of redeeming time, as I hope will be 
 of service to me while I live. But, however, profita- 
 ble my travelling with Mr. Wesley might be, as the 
 exercise was too much, I was obliged to give it up. 
 
 It was also of service to me to spend some time in 
 London, among some of our old, happy Methodists; who 
 bore with my weakness, and by their prayers and exam- 
 ple, confirmed me more and more in the truth as it is in 
 Jesus. 
 
 What the Lord has been doing by me in Kent, Essex, 
 Norwich, Manchester, Macclesfield, in the Yarm and 
 Thirsk circuits, and in Scotland, is known to him. I 
 bless God that 1 have seen the work prosper and increase
 
 MR. DVWOAW WRIGHT. ITS 
 
 m roost of the circuits I have been in, not indeed in con- 
 sequence of my preaching, so much as by some regard to 
 our discipline, and the labour of my colleagues. I have 
 been happy, in having those in general with me who were 
 not di'ones but hearty in the work of God. Aid their 
 love to discipline has uot been labour in vain; to God 
 alone be all the glory! 
 
 Before I conclude, I must not forget lo mention one 
 circumstance in order to encourage others, and to justi- 
 fy the observation, '-That we hardly know, what we are 
 capable of, till we are put to the trial " 
 
 When 1 was in Scotland, I remarked that many of the 
 clergy were men of sense and piety, and took real pains 
 in their work. And yet there was in many places, a 
 want of care and zeal for the spiritual welfa e of the poor 
 Highlanders. Many of the^e coming for employment to 
 the larger towns, were destitute of all help for their souls: 
 as they did not understand English. In Edinburgh and 
 Glasgow there have been places of worship bait for them, 
 within these few years, and well supplied; but in Aber- 
 deen, Perth, and Greenock, still they had none to help. 
 When Mr. M'Nab went to Scotland, in 1769, he began to 
 preach to them as well as he could, and wanted me to 
 come to his help. Mr. Wesley accordingly appointed me 
 for Scotland at the ensuing conference, and desired me 
 to try to recover my Erse: but of this 1 had no hope; as I 
 could not read a verse of it, and never spoke two min- 
 utes in it on religious subjects in my life. 
 
 However, when I came to Perth, and saw their for- 
 lorn condition, several motives induced me to make a 
 trial. 1 therefore bought a New-Testament in the mo- 
 dern Galic, and got one of the society who could read it, 
 to give me some instructions. By Christmas I had made 
 such a progress, that my teacher was positive I could 
 preach in it, and would needs invite the Highlanders to 
 come and hear me. But I knew my deficiency better 
 than he did; however, I was prevailed upon to let him 
 invite them. He gave out the Psalm and sung it for me. 
 When I began to pray in Erse, 1 should have been set 
 fast, had I not learned the Lord's prayer before hand. 
 When [ began to speak, I was often obliged to break off, 
 and address the people in English. But by the grace of 
 God, in less than four years, 1 could officiate in that lan- 
 guage two hours together, without a word of English.
 
 276 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 While we were thus employed, the ministers in Perth, 
 and in se\eial other places, wished us good luck in the 
 name of the Lord. 
 
 Thi 1 - was by far the most delightful work I ever had. 
 But it was often hard enough, as I commonly preached at 
 Greenock, in English, at seven in the morning: then spent 
 two hours, fiom ten to twelve, with the High andcs: 
 walked to Port-Glasgow, and preached in the streets at 
 foui; then walked back to Gieenock, and preached at six 
 o'clock, and then met the society. Although by this 
 means I had many an aching head, and pained breast, 
 yet it was delightful to see hundreds attending to my 
 blundering preaching, with streaming eye, and attention 
 still as night: or to hear them, in their simple waj, sing- 
 ing the praises of God in their own tongue. If evei God 
 said to my heart, "Go, and I will be with thee," it was 
 then, when with much trembling, and deep sighs. I have 
 gone to preach toJhem, hardly knowing what to say. I 
 extol the name ofmy adorable Master, that my labours 
 were not in vain. How gladly wruld I have . spent my 
 life with these dear s>uls! But my health would not per- 
 mit it; so 1 was obliged to leave them. 
 
 To conclude: How graciously did my heavenly Father 
 strive with me by his spit it, even from my infant days! 
 and when I wa> an outcast, and lost as to any thing in 
 religon, he reclaimed the wanderer, and brought me to 
 hisTold;lhen led me into the wilderness to shew me my 
 heart! Healed my backslidings, comforted and fortified 
 me for suffeiings; and knowing my feebleness, led me 
 giadually on to preach to those who most needed my as- 
 sistance! 
 
 And, when he saw a little affliction needful, he sent it. 
 And a profitable time it puved to me; all thanks to the 
 sender! 1 have since seen such beauty in holiness, and in 
 the imitation of Christ, and have had such discoveries of 
 the boundless love of God, as I never had before. fur 
 an eternity to praise him in! 
 
 If ever man could say the following lines, surely I may: 
 
 "Pardon'd for all that I have done, 
 
 "M} mouth as in the dust 1 hide, 
 •'And glory give to God alone, 
 
 ''My God forever pacified."
 
 THE EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 BEFORE hearing the gospel, which is the power of 
 God unto salvation, I was often terrified in dreams and 
 visions of the night. Sometimes 1 thought I was falling 
 down steep precipices; at others, that tfie devil was stand- 
 ing over me to take me away immediately. 
 
 At such times, I have often awakened, shrieking in 
 such a manner as terrified all who heard me. Afterwards 
 I heard the gospel for a season, at Rookhope, in the 
 county of Durham; but the people not receiving the joy- 
 ful sound, the servants of God forsook the place. I was 
 left with much uneasiness on my mind; what I formerly 
 delighted in, was now hateful to me. I could play no 
 more on the violin, or at cards, nor sing vain songs; nei- 
 ther had I a desire to speak any more than I was forced 
 to. The people saw my distress, but not knowing God, 
 eould not point out a cure. 
 
 In this condition I continued for some weeks. I be- 
 gan to read religious books, and likewise to bow my 
 knees before God in secret; sometimes I could weep 
 much, but having no one to direct me, after a time 1 got 
 back into folly, and pursued my evil practices with more 
 eagerness than before. About four years after, I was 
 called to live in Weardale-chapel. I then heard the 
 Methodists very frequently. I was often softened under 
 the word. I never found a desire to mock the people, as 
 many do; but rather stood in awe of them. But all this 
 while I continued in my sins. The first ,Sabbath in Lent, 
 1767, 1 heard, as u*ual, a Methodist preacher in the af- 
 ternoon. I did not then find that the word made any 
 impression upon me. But at night, on my bed, the Lord 
 cut me to the heart, and I could not help roaring for the 
 disquietnesS of my s<>ul. I then felt I must pedsh eter 
 nally, unless some way to escape were found which I 
 knew not of. Immediately I wiahed for the Methodists 
 24
 
 -i*8 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 to pray with me; but in particular for a young man, Ste- 
 phen VVatson, who is now in glory. (From the time he 
 knew Jesus, he was a pattern to all the society. And after 
 having walked four years in the light of God's counte- 
 nance, he departed in the full assurance of faith; having 
 testified for many months before his death, that the 
 blood of Jesus had cleansed him from all sin. His last 
 words were, "Glory be to God for ever and ever! Amen 
 and Amen !") 
 
 One morning I fell down on my knees to ask forgive- 
 ness for my many offences, and continued to cry night 
 and day. My burden increased, and temptations were 
 very strong. I then began to compare my»elf with the 
 most sinful of my companions, and with other notorious 
 sinners I had heard of; but 1 could find no equal. I said, 
 from the ground of my heart, of all the sinners under 
 heaven, 1 am the chief. The enemy then suggested, 
 that I was guilty of a sin which God never would pardon. 
 
 Tongue cannot express the distress I then felt. — The 
 heart knoweth its own bitterness. I thought, never man 
 suffered what I did. That saying, "A dreadful sound in 
 his ears," continually followed me. I found the enemy 
 ready day and night to devour me. When in private 
 prayer, I thought he had hold of my clothes. For many 
 nights he suggested, if 1 prayed, he would appear and 
 tear me in pieces. Yet I durst not but pray, though my 
 prayers were mostly made up of sighs and groans. One 
 day, drawing towards evening, the enemy came in as a 
 flood, and the temptation was, to put an end to a wretch- 
 ed life. I resisted, but it continued to come as quick as 
 lightning, and 1 was afraid that the tempter would pre- 
 vail, so that I durst not carry a penknife about me. 
 This was the only time I was banished from private 
 prayer, because 1 durst not stay alone. That night we 
 met our class; I then cried out to one of my brethren, 
 who was waiting for me to go with him to the meeting, O 
 Cuthbert! I am driven to distraction ! He spake to me 
 as comfortably as he could; but as we walked together, 
 I found as if one was hanging on the skirts of my 
 clothes. After the first prayer was over, it was with 
 difficulty 1 rose fr< m my knees. When the leader asked 
 how 1 found the state of my soul. I answered. I am left 
 without one spark of hope that Godwill ever have mercy
 
 MR. ROBERT WILKINSON. 279 
 
 on me. No, said he, you are not; for if you were; you 
 would not now be using the means of grace. 
 
 He encouraged me to follow on; but I still found no 
 comfort. All the time of my convictions 1 had but very 
 little ease, and when I had, I had a fear almost equal to 
 my pain, lest I should fallback into sin, or speak peace 
 when God did not. O how 1 longed for deliverance from 
 sin! I often cried, Lord, if 1 am forever banished from 
 thy presence, let me not sin again! 
 
 Not Ion? after, that text in the 51st Psalm followed 
 me, "Then will I teach transgressors thy ways, and sin- 
 ners shall be converted unto thee." I thought if God did 
 pardon me, he could refuse none; but the foulest on this 
 side hell might come and welcome. But this was the 
 sting, I thought he would not. However, 1 kept using the 
 means, and went frequently among the Methodists, to 
 get them to pray with me. And I would have been glad, 
 if they had asked rne to stay all night, but shame would 
 not let me tell them so. I often thought I never could 
 get oyer another night. My neighbours said 1 was be- 
 side myself, for 1 could not rest in my bed. I often rose 
 and wandered in the fields, weeping and bewailing my 
 desperate state. But, blessed be God, he that wounds 
 can heal. 
 
 In the beginning of July, Stephen Watson and I 
 were sitting together, he had a volume of the Christian 
 Library in his hand, out of which he read one of Mr. 
 Rutherford's letters. When he had done, Stephen, said 
 I, I find as it were a melting warmness in my breast. — 
 So do I too said he. He then asked, cannot you believe 
 that God has pardoned your sins? No, said Ij 1 dare 
 not: on which I immediately lost my comfort. 
 
 Sabbath, the 12th of July, Joseph Watson preached in 
 the Chapel in Weardale. He gave out that hymn, 
 
 All ye that pass by, 
 
 To Jesus draw nigh, 
 To you is it nothing- that Jesus should die? 
 
 Your ransom and peace, 
 
 Your surety he is, 
 Come, see if there ever was sorrow like his. 
 
 For you and for me 
 He prayed on the tree, 
 The prayer is accepted, the sinner is free:—
 
 $80 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 Then, all within me cried out, 
 
 The sinner am I, 
 "Who on Jesus rely, 
 And come for the pardon God cannot deny. 
 
 I then believed that God, for Christ's sake, had forgiv- 
 en all my sins, and found that peace which arises from 
 a sense of reconciliation. The people of God who knew 
 my distress, perceived by my countenance that the Lord 
 was gracious to me, before 1 had the opportunity to tell 
 them. I then went rejoicing home, and could not help 
 telling what God had done for my soul. 
 
 It was not long before my faith was tried. One of our 
 brethren, a Calvinist, lent mc a book. As I read, I 
 thought Mr. Wesley was quite in the wrong; and I 
 found something in me that rose against him; yet one 
 rhing I remember I could not swallow, which was. The 
 author asserted that a sense of inbred sin would reconcile 
 us to death. No, said Mr. Wesley, nothing but perfect 
 love. Indeed I could not persuade myself that the sting 
 of death could reconcile us to death itself. However, I 
 read and reasoned myself miserable. Yet the Lord gave 
 me grace to wrestle with him in prayer; and every day 
 I found more or less the witness of my sonship. I was 
 then afraid, if I sought holiness, I should rob Christ of 
 his glory. Some of our people hearing that I read that 
 book, and conversed with the man who lent it, took it for 
 granted that I was prejudiced against the "doctrine of 
 perfection," and those that preached it. They told this 
 to my band leader. I went one Sabbath morning as 
 usual, at seven o'clock, to meet my band, and found my- 
 self in a peaceable frame of mind. No sooner did the 
 leader begin to pray, than he cried, * k Lord, never suffer 
 us to be prejudiced against thy servants, seeing that thy 
 will is our sanctification!" I found as it were, something 
 in me saying, he means me. When he spoke his expe- 
 rience, he expressed the same thing; on which 1 said, it 
 is me you mean. He au*>wered, "What 1 have said, I 
 have said." 1 then found violent prejudice against him. 
 My peace was gone. My soul was torn in pieces within 
 me. 1 told one of our people as we went home, how my 
 leader had behaved towards me. 1 did not regard break- 
 ing the band rules, because 1 was determined never to
 
 UK ROBERT WILKINSON. 28 1 
 
 meet in a band any more. I had no rest: though I could 
 not give up my confidence in God, nevertheless my cor- 
 ruption* boiled so within me, that I could have fought 
 with a feather. 
 
 On Friday night we had preaching. I went to it like 
 one posse^ssd with a legion of devils. Afterwards the 
 bands met, and the preacher earnestly exhorted all pre- 
 sent to look for the second blessing, and insisted that it 
 might be received. Now, thought I, if there is such a 
 thing, none can stand in more need of it than I do. But 
 the e-semy suggested: "There are those that have known 
 God several years, and have not attained; and shalt thou 
 be delivered who had been justified only a few months?" 
 Immediately I found power to resist the temptation, and 
 said within myself, God is not tied to time. No sooner 
 did that thought pass through my heart than the power of 
 God seized me. I found I could not resist, and therefore 
 turned myself over upon the seat: I cannot express how 
 I was. I found such a travail in my soul as if it would 
 burst from the body. I continued so, till I was motion- 
 less and insensible for a season. But as I was coming to 
 myself I found such an emptying, and then such a heav- 
 en of love springing up in my soul, as 1 had never felt be- 
 fore: with an application of these blessed words, "He 
 that believeth on me, as the scripture hath said, out of 
 his belly shall flow rivers of living water." If possible, 
 I could have put my band leader into my heart. The 
 book 1 mentioned before had pleased me so well that I 
 had given orders to him that lent it me, to buy me one of 
 them. But no sooner did God work thi- change in my 
 soul, than I found an utter aversion to it, and told the 
 man, you must not buy it, for I shall never read it more. 
 
 In the year 1768, I was sent to call sinners to repent- 
 ance, in and about the city of Carlisle. Hererl was much 
 persecuted; but, blessed be God, he delivered me out of 
 the hands of all my enemies, and gave me several seals 
 to my ministry. 
 
 {Thus far Mr. Wilkinson lived to write himself. One 
 of his fellow labourers added what follows.^ 
 
 My acquaintance with Mr. Wilkinson was very short. 
 The first time I ever saw him was a little above three 
 24 *
 
 28£ EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 years ago. The next time was after last Bristol confer- 
 ence. He was there appointed to labour with me in and 
 about Grimsby. 
 
 When we met in the circuit, we were both in health; 
 but the day before our quarterly meeting, I was taken 
 very ill of a fever; however the next morning I ventured 
 to set out for the meeting; but having fifteen miles to 
 ride, it was with much difficulty I got safe thither. And 
 then I was unable to attend either the love-feast or the 
 watch-night. 
 
 But I shall never forget the prayer Mr. Wilkinson put 
 up for me at tlie close of the love feast, " That the Lord 
 would spare me a little longer, and raise me up again to 
 labour in his vineyard." His prayer pierced the heav- 
 ens, the power of God came d -wn upon the people like a 
 torrent of rain. They were so affected that they wept 
 and rejoiced abundantly. Immediately I shared with 
 them, although I was notjn the same room, the divine 
 presence broke my heart to pieces. My soul overflowed 
 with love, and my eyes with tears. I know not that I 
 was ever so powerfully and suddenly affected under any 
 person's prayer, except on the day 1 was converted to 
 G >d. Immediately I had faith to believe the Lord would 
 raise me up again, and for several minutes it appeared to 
 we as if I was perfectly well. The next day I went 
 along with him to Louth; and in that time we had a good 
 deal of conversation together, which chiefly turned upon 
 these two points, viz. Predestination and Christian Per- 
 fection. 
 
 He told me with sorrow of heart, how often he had 
 been grieved for the immense hurt that he had seen done 
 by the preaching of unconditional predestination, as it 
 blocked up the way of repentence; weakened the foun- 
 dation of diligence; damped the fervour of believers af- 
 ter holiness; and had a tendency to destroy it root and 
 branch. Ht likewi-e very warmly expressed his love tor 
 Bibb- holiness, sa. ing, it was the delight of his soul to 
 press after it himself, and to enforce it upon others; and 
 that while he was doing this, the L<»rd blessed him most 
 in his labours, and shone clearest upon the work he had 
 wrought in his own soul. He signified to me that the 
 Lotd had circumcised his heart to love the Lord his God 
 with all his heart, with all his soul, and with all his
 
 MK. KOBKKT WILKINSON. 283 
 
 strength: and I believe, at that time, lie was full of faith 
 and the Holy Ghost. 
 
 He was truly meek, and lowly of heart: and little, and 
 mean, and \ile in his own eyes. I found my mind 
 amazingly united to him. for the time we were together, 
 like the soul of I) ivid and his beloved Jonathan. I lo- 
 ved him much for the mind of Christ I saw in him, and 
 for his zeal for the Lord <>( hosts. We parted at Louth, 
 and I endeavoured, with the fever upon me, to creep 
 along to Ted ford to preach: but it was with much trou- 
 ble I went through my discourse. That night the fever 
 seized upon me more violently, and never left me for 
 near a month. About a week after, Mr. Wilkinson came 
 to Tedford to see me. We sj'ent about three hours to- 
 gether veiy profitably. We then both of us prayed, and 
 commended each other to God. 
 
 A few days after we patted, he was taken ill of the 
 fever, and could not rest until he came to his wife at 
 Grimsby; where he lay ill for four or five weeks. He 
 then appeared to be recovering fast, and walked about a 
 little; but he suddenly relapsed, and was carried off in 
 about a week. 
 
 He bore all his afflictions with great patience, fre- 
 quently lifting up his heart to Cud, and repeating these 
 words: '*But he knoweth the way that I take: when he 
 hath tried me, I shall come forth as gold. My foot hath 
 held his «teps, his way have I kept, and not declined. 
 Neither have I gone back from the commandment of his 
 lips; I have esteemed the words of his mouth more than 
 my nece.vary food." Job xxiii. When he perceived 
 that he should die, he exhorted his wife to cast all her 
 care upon the Lord: and encouraged her to believe that 
 his grace was sufficient for her. 
 
 He then prayed for her and his two children; earnestlv 
 intreaung the Lord to protect them in this troublesome 
 world, and to supply all their wants. 
 
 He next prayed fervently for Mr. Wesley, that the 
 pre-euce of the Lord might continue with him all his 
 days, and crown him at last with eternal glory. 
 
 He then remembered his three fellow-labourers in the 
 circuit, praying that the Redeemer would assist us in the 
 great work: that he would go forth with, and bless the 
 labours of all the preachers, and that the kingdom of the
 
 284 KXPKRIRN8B »F 
 
 Redeemer might spread unto the ends of the earth, and 
 preserve them until they join the church triumphant. 
 
 In 'he night season, he had a severe conflict with Sa- 
 tan, and his spirit wrestled with God in pra\er. Yea. he 
 was in an agony, as he said afterward?. At last the 
 tempter fled, and he seemed as if he was admit'ed into 
 heaven, to converse with God, with angels and saints. 
 
 He suddenly waked his wife, (who was in the .-aine 
 room) and said, "Thou hast been sleeping, but I have 
 been in heaven, f) what has the Lord discovered to mc 
 this night! O the glory of God! the glory of God and 
 heaven! the celestial city! the New Jerusalem! O the 
 lovely beauty! the happiness of paradise! God is ail love; 
 he is nothing but love! O help me to praise him! O help 
 me to praise him! I shall praise him forever! I shall praise 
 him forevei" So Robert Wilkinson departed this life in 
 peace, on Friday, December 8th, about eleven o'clock, 
 1780. 
 
 It seemed a great providence that he died on the mar- 
 ket day, when a number of friends out of the country 
 were present, who quickly published in their little villa- 
 ges, that a funeral sermon would be preached on Sab- 
 bath. The house was well filled, and the Lord made it 
 a solemn time. I believe there was scarce a dry eye in 
 the congregation. 
 
 I have often taken notice, how the Lord makes the 
 triumphant death of good men a peculiar blessing to his 
 children, who are left behind; sw it was at this time. The 
 people of God were remarkably ble>t in hearing the dying 
 testimony of our dear friend. The wordly people and 
 he back-sliders also were cut to the heart. 
 
 At the conclusion of the sermon I dropt these words- 
 earth has lost, and heaven has gained a child of God — 
 Let. us pray the Lord to add another to the church mili- 
 tant. We did so; and the Lord answered our p;ayer, 
 by setting a young man's soul at liberty, so that he went 
 rom the solemn place, as the shepherds from the heaven- 
 ly vision, blesMiij:, praising, and glorifying God. 
 
 The minister of the parish behaved exceeding kind: 
 he came to the preaching house, stayed awhile, and then 
 walkeii slowly before the corpse; whilst the people sung 
 a hymn of praise. When we aimed at the church, one 
 «f our friends asked him if we might sing a hymn. He
 
 MR. WILLIAM FERGUSON*. 285 
 
 answered, "I have no objection: T am against nothing that 
 is good." So we sung those awful words, 
 
 Thee we adore, eternal name, 
 
 "And humbly own to thee, 
 "How feeble is our mortal frame, 
 
 "What dying worms we be!" 
 
 The people sang lustily and with a solemn spirit; for the 
 divine presence was with us all the way through; and in 
 such a manner as I never knew before at any funeral. 
 
 When the minister tead these words, "Not to be sorry 
 a? men without hope," Mrs. Wilkinson (who hung upon 
 my arm with her two little Dabes) was so overwhelmed 
 with the presence of God, that she could not refrain from 
 crying out, "sorry! no! glory be to God! glory be to 
 God! glory, and praise, and blessing, be ascribed unto 
 God, forever and ever!" Her spirit seemed as if it was 
 ready to launch into the eternal world, to be with Jesus 
 and her happy husband. A remarkable power fell on all 
 that could hear her; so that the people were melted into 
 tears; some of sorrow, others ofjo^. 
 
 From this time the work of God began to revive at 
 Grimsby, and the country people caught the fire, and 
 carried it along with them into their little societies. 
 
 Robert Wilkinson was, as you have described him, 
 "an Israelite indeed; a man of faith and prayer: who 
 having been a pattern of all good works, died in the full 
 triumph of faith." O what a blessing to live and die a 
 Christian! May I also be a follower of those who through 
 faith and patience inherit the promises! In my life, and 
 at my death may I be like him! 
 
 THE EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 MY father and mother lived at Kelso, in Scotland, 
 where they had five children. But when my mother was 
 big of the sixth, she could not be delivered, the child being 
 dead within her. In a desperate case a desperate nieth-
 
 286 EXPERIENCE OT 
 
 od was used; incision was made, and the child taken out 
 of her side. And vet, by the blessing of God she sur- 
 vived, and recovered her health and strength. But the 
 physician assured her. if she had another child it could 
 not be born, but she must infallibly die. H>wever she 
 was with child again: as the time of her delivery ap- 
 proached, expecting nothing but death, she cried to God 
 day and night. But to the amazement of all she was 
 delivered with more ease, than she had ever been of any 
 child before. 
 
 I was the child then born, on the 25th of March, 17SJ. 
 I was brought up a Presbyterian, and had very early im- 
 pressions on my soul. When I was about six years old, 
 I used to wonder I could not weep under sermons, as 
 others did. I left off play, and going into the fields, used 
 to think of God, of the devil, of heaven and hell. I 
 thought God loved me, and was willing to bring me to 
 heaven. But I thought if the devil should get me to hell, 
 I shall never get out. Yet I tho> ght, Christ suffered for 
 my sins, and thereby made a full atonement foi them. — 
 But although I knew these great truths, yet my heart 
 was unchanged: and I constantly went on in the follies of 
 childhood, according to the devices of my own heart. 
 
 When I was ten years old, my parents removed to 
 Eysmouth, eight miles north of Berwick: here 1 grew 
 thoughtful again, and began to pray much, wherein 1 
 found so great pleasure, that 1 persuaded four boys 1 was 
 acquainted with, to go with me, morning and evening, 
 into a secret place in a timberyard, between two stacks 
 of deals, where we prayed one after the other. This we 
 constantly did for two months: but a young gentleman 
 lodged just by, whose window looked into the yard: ob- 
 serving us to go thither constantly, he wanted to know 
 the reason. And meeting me one day alone, after giving 
 me many good words, asked me, why we met together 
 between the stack?? I told him, but begged him not to 
 tell any one: which he faithfully promised. But not- 
 withstanding he went immediately and told the children 
 themselves, and their parents, and the people of the 
 town: many of whom cried out, **that it was blasphemy 
 for such young children to pretend to pray." Ti e chil- 
 dren were soon laughed out of their religion, and never 
 rested till they made me like themselves: nay till they 

 
 MR. WILLIAM FERGUSON. 287 
 
 taught me to get drunk, which we did in that very place 
 where we used to pray together. 
 
 Two years after my parents removed to Holy Island, 
 nine miles south of Berwick. The people of this place 
 were mostly smugglers, and the childien, remarkably 
 wicked. Of these 1 soon learnt to curse and swear and 
 to glory in my shame. I learned to tell lies for sport, to 
 play at cards, to dance, to work the greatest part of the 
 Sabbath day, and to make a mock at all religious people, 
 saying, they were all hypocrites. And in this deplorable 
 condition 1 remained till I was near twenty years old. 
 
 During this time 1 was twice in great danger of being 
 drowned, going to Holy Island in very dark nights. It 
 was also a flowing tide; I had lost my way: and the sea 
 came in fast upon me. But both times I was brought safe 
 to land. I was serious for awhile after. But 1 then got 
 into laughing trifling company: and my seriousnesss soon 
 wore oft*. Another time being with a gang of smugglers, 
 a king's officer clapt a pistol to my breast, and swore bit- 
 terly, if 1 lifted a hand, he would shoot me through the 
 heart. The thought of instant death shocked me much. 
 But this too 1 stifled by drinking and dancing. 
 
 So 1 continued fast asleep in the devil's arms, till one 
 day as 1 was working in the shop with my father, my mind 
 ran upon a match of drinking and dancing, in which I 
 was engaged to join in the evening. Suddenly I heard 
 a voice from heaven, saying, "What if thou shouldst 
 drop down dead in the midst of the dance! wouldst thou 
 go to heaven?" I said, <'No, 1 am not fit for heaven." 
 Immediately 1 felt, 1 had past sentence upon myself; and 
 that if 1 went not to heaven, hell was my portion; light 
 broke in: 1 was filled with horror; 1 saw myself hanging 
 over the mouth of hell, by the brittle thread of life. 
 
 My father looked me in the face, and asked, * ; what is 
 the matter?" But 1 made no answer. — He said, certainly 
 something is the matter. For you are sometimes red as 
 scarlet, and in a moment white as chalk. But still 1 
 spoke not one word: my mouth was stopt: 1 was guilty 
 before God. Yet I was thankful that 1 was alive, and 
 thought, "O that God would let me live one day longer! 
 In how different a manner would I spend my time! Sure- 
 ly not in the ways -f sin." Soon after, I sat down to 
 dinner: but 1 could not swallow a morsel. My mother
 
 288 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 observing this, was very angry with my father, thinking 
 I was grieved at something he had said. But finding that 
 was not the case, she was quite struck, and turning to 
 me, said, "my dear, why do not you cat your dinner?" I 
 made no answer. Indeed I could not, for my heart was 
 fit to break. 
 
 In the eveuing my company came in, to carry me to 
 the dancing, To their great surprise they found me 
 reading the Bible. They asked my father and mother, 
 "Are not you willing he should go with us?" They said, 
 "yes; but we think he is not well." They said, '-Come, 
 we shall soon cure him, lay hold. We will carry him." 
 "Do, says another, and 1 will carry his fiddle." I look- 
 ed at them and said very mildly, "If you do carry me 
 I shall be of no use to you. . For a dance I will not dance 
 this night: and a tune I will not play." They stared, 
 and left me. 
 When our family went to rest, I durst not go to bed, for 
 ear 1 should awake in hell. 1 tried to pray, but could not. 
 I stayed for some, time with my heart as hard as a stone. 
 At last I fell upon my knees; and with a flood of tears 
 cried out, "Lord be merciful tome; for 1 am a great sin- 
 ner.'' I found my mind a little eased, and went to bed 
 and slept comfortably. But in the morning my trouble 
 was as great as ever. When 1 went out about my busi- 
 ness, many mocked me for my gravity: others said, "It 
 is a great pity so fine a young man should lose the use of 
 his reason." But what grieved me more, was to see all 
 the people, as I had been myself fast asleep in the devil's 
 arms. 
 
 On Sabbath morning 1 rose early, and the tide being 
 out, walked to Lonwick on the main land, and went to a 
 Presbyterian meeting. The ministers text was, "I will 
 arise and go to my father." It was a word spoke in 
 season. I thought he looked at me all the time. Peo- 
 ple did indeed look at me; many of them knowing me 
 well, and wondering, how 1 came there. When 1 came 
 home, my mother begged me with tears, to reveal what 
 was upon my mind. She said, "What is it you have 
 done? Have you murdered any body?"' I said, "no mo- 
 ther; I have murdered no budy; but 1 have almost mur- 
 dered my puoi soul."
 
 MR. WILLIAM FERGUSON. 289 
 
 As soon as the inhabitants of the island found that 1 
 would not drink, swear, or work on the Lord's day, they 
 ■were violently angry, so that I could hardly walk the 
 street for the mob setting upon me. And my father and 
 mother insisted on my working at my business on the 
 Lord's day. But 1 told them, "No, never more; 1 will 
 sooner have the flesh tore off' my bones." My prayer now 
 was, to get out of this ungodly place; and a fortnight af- 
 ter, my parents consented: so 1 left them, not knowing 
 whither I was going, but designed to follow my father's 
 trade, provided 1 could get any master, who would not 
 require me to work on the Lord's day. 
 
 When 1 came to Newcastle-upon-Tyne, as 1 was going 
 down Pilgrim street, 1 saw abundance of people going 
 along, who seemed remarkably seri >us. 1 asked a man, 
 "Pray, who are all these?" He answered, "These are all 
 Wesleyite*; they are coming from the preaching." This 
 was the first time I saw or heard of them. The next day 
 1 went on to Sunderland, where 1 found out my father's 
 brother, and enquired if he knew any barber who did not 
 work on the Sabbath? "^es," said he, "there is Tommy 
 Parker," So to him 1 went without delay. 
 
 To my great surprise, the sailors that came into our 
 shop, did not curse or swear at all. But several of them, 
 took my master by the hand and said, "How do you do, 
 brother?" 1 asked, pray, sir, are all these your broth- 
 ers?" He said, "We are all brethren in Christ."— 
 When Sabbath came, I got one to shew me to the preach- 
 ing house, where 1 saw my master in the pulpit! His 
 text was, "He shall bring forth the top stone with shout- 
 ing, crying grace, grace, unto it. 1 then told him the 
 distress of my mind. He advised me to go to London, 
 telling me, 1 should there have all the means of grace in 
 the greatest abundance. 1 went to London, where my 
 cousin, Thomas Fryer, soon got me into a shop: and not 
 long after, on my telling him 1 wanted to meet in a class 
 carried me to he tabernacle. 1 went into the vestry and 
 told two gentlemen 1 found there, "I should be glad to 
 meet in a class, that I may speak my experience, and tell 
 of the woik of God which 1 have found upon my heart." 
 One of them said, "What class shall we put him into?" 
 The other answered, "indeed 1 cannot ?e 1. Mr. Wes- 
 ley's classes are far more strictly looked after than ours." * 
 25
 
 S90 
 
 JbZCKUIEHOE OF 
 
 If you please then said 1, I will go and meet in one of 
 his classes. He looked at me, and said, "really young 
 man, 1 cannot blame you." 1 went immediately to iMr. 
 Wesley, who after a little conversation, gave me a not« 
 of admittance. 
 
 As 1 now prayed much, and heard many sermons, and 
 abstained from all known sin, I began to be very easv, 
 supposing myself to be a very good Christian. And one 
 day in a house in Radclitf highway, 1 began talking as if 
 ! had gone a great way in religion. Tins, an old gentle- 
 woman observing, came and taking me bv the hand, said, 
 "D > you know your sins are pardoned r" 1 answered, 
 *4 hope so." She said, 'd fear not: fo>- if they were, you 
 would have the witness in yourself. Satan cares not 
 how far we go in religion, if we will but st »p short of 
 this. 1 advice you, when yoq go home, pray earnestly to 
 the Lord, to show you whether your sins are pardoned. 
 If they are, to give you the witness of it: if tliey are not, 
 never to let you rest with -ut it." 
 
 1 was quite speechless, finding 1 had stopped short of 
 the prize. 1 hastened home, praying all the way. 1 
 watched, I prayed, I waited in all the means of grace, 
 longing for Christ to come into my heait. I could ii«id- 
 1v eat any food, till Sabbath came, wlien I went to the 
 Seven-diais, to hear .Mr. Wesley. I was much biest un- 
 der the word, expecting every moment to receive the 
 witness. On Monday, as 1 <atat work, I was thinking 
 the sermon over again, when on a sudden my mind was 
 whirled away, and fi'itd with vain imaginations. After 
 a time I cried out, "'Lord, whit a wicked wretch am 1! 
 Wilt thou pardon this, with all my other sins?" In a 
 moment the Lord said to my heart, ,k My blood hath 
 atoned not only for this, but f >r all the sins which thou 
 hast ever committed. Thou art no more thy own. Thou 
 art bought with a price; and 1 will give the power to glo- 
 rify me, with thy body, and spirit, which are mine." 
 
 In that moment my hell w;;s turned into heaven: joyful 
 day, that ascertained the kingdom mine; just two years 
 after the Lord had awakened me out of the sleep of 
 death. 1 seemed now to be in another world: every thing 
 was new. Every thing about me was comfortable; for the 
 Lord smiled upon my soul. For two days and two nights, 
 every breath 1 drew was praise and prayer having sweet
 
 ilR. WILLIAM ?ER«US»U. 
 
 291 
 
 intercourse opened between God and my soul. When 
 Satan tempted, I said, "go to my Lord!"' and the 
 temptation died away. Whatever I wanted, 1 could make 
 my request known to my reconciled father for it, in the 
 name of his well beloved son, and he granted my petition. 
 1 asked of him two temporal blessings, the one that he 
 would give me a lawful calling, wherein I might not be so 
 continually teazed to wink on the Sabbath day; the other, 
 that he would <iive me a help mate. He answered me in 
 both. He inclined the heart of a watchmaker to teach 
 me his trade; who afterwards gave me his grand-daughter 
 to wife. And from that time we have sweetly gone on 
 hand in hand, towards our Father's kingdom. 
 # Some time after, having a great desire to see my pa. 
 rents once more, 1 went with my wife to Holy Island 
 But now I was exposed to a danger 1 had not foreseen. 
 1 was employed in my trade by some ot the first people 
 in the country, and frequently invited to their house; 
 whereby pride and other unholy tempers began to revive 
 in my soul. However, by the grace of G-nl, I continued 
 fighting again-t them, thougo sometimes conquering, 
 sometimes yielding. Indeed 1 seemed like a door upun 
 th«hinges, turning backwards and forwards. This filled 
 me with unspeakable grief and though I still knew God 
 was reconciled, yet I went mourning all the day long, be- 
 cause of inbred siri. 
 
 But ab.tut fourteen years ago, as 1 was one night sitting 
 in my house at Alnwick, in Northumberland, my family 
 being all in bed, I began to read one of Mr. Walsh's ser- 
 mons. When 1 came to those words. ''Salvation is two 
 fold, emptying us of evil, and filling us with good ! My 
 heart was melted down, aud 1 cried out, "Lord, give me 
 at least the former part of thy salvation. Empty me of 
 evil !" hi a moment I felt such a change as no tongue 
 can express. 1 felt every kind and degree ot anger and 
 resentment quite taken out of my heart. My pride also 
 was gone, and I was thoroughly content to be despised of 
 ail men. 1 was cru,citied to the world; to all its honou-s 
 and profit-.; all its "comforts and pleasures. The fear of 
 man was quite gone: and so was all conformity to the 
 woi Id. I regarded neither the smiles nor the fiow.is of 
 great men; being quite set at liberty, and finding nothing
 
 292 EXPERIENCE OF 
 
 in my heart but pure love. Love free from dissimula- 
 tion, abhorring that which is evil, and cleaving to that 
 which is g »od. 
 
 1 cried out, "What shall 1 render unto the Lord, for all 
 the benefits he hath done unto me?" The Lord said, il Go 
 work in my vineyard. As thou liast been a faithful ad- 
 vocate for the devil, be now a faithful laborer for me." 
 I shivered at the thought, knowing the littleness of my 
 talents, and feaiiny; I should dishonour hi* cause: \et be- 
 lieving it was his will, 1 promised to go, though with my 
 life in my hand. 
 
 Whe:i I declared what a blessing 1 had received, there 
 was nobody that would believe it. And when I said, 1 be- 
 lieved God had called me to preach, many were ready to» 
 swallow me up. I desired they would give me a fair tri- 
 al. But it could not he. 8o 1 went to a little country- 
 town, where no Methodist had ever preached. I spoke 
 to a serious, attentive congregation; in consequence of 
 which, 1 was invited to four country-towns near Alnwick. 
 But the more 1 laboured, the more offended >ome of my 
 brethren were, till the providence of God calltd me to 
 London. 
 
 1 came to London on Friday, nine years ago. The 
 next day the men were hung in chains on Bow-common. 
 On Sabbath thousands of people came to gaze at them: 
 to whom 1 preached on, ''What is a 'man profited, if he 
 shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soulr" 
 Quickly after 1 was seized with a violent fever. But the 
 consolations of God were not small with me; and made 
 me large amends for all the pain 1 suffered. After the 
 Lord had raised me up from my>ick-bed, it pleased him 
 to try me with poverty. We were brought so low, as to 
 have neither food to eat, nor raiment to put on. This 
 was our case, while 1 served a severe master, for very 
 small wages; who nevertheless, was continually blaming 
 me, and threatening to turn me off. 
 
 At length, the Lord put it into the heart of my dear 
 wife, to advise me to try what 1 could do in Holland. 1 
 left England in the latter end of August. After a pas- 
 sage often davs, 1 lauded at Amsterdam, from whence 
 1 went to the Hague. It was at first very distressing to 
 me that 1 did not understand the language. But the 
 Lord moved the minds of the people wherever 1 was, t©
 
 MR. WILLIAM FERGUSON. 298 
 
 help me all they could. He raised me up real friends 
 who >ent me fr mi town to town, and recommended me 
 from (me to .mother: even to the first persons of the laud 
 And after having; disposed at my woods I was br.m t 
 home again in safety, after an absence of six months and 
 three lays. 
 
 1 ti>Vw thought my work abroad was done, and that 1 
 might >peud the rest of my life in my own country — 
 But to my surprise, 1 received abundance of letters, ear- 
 nestly pressing me to come back. Believing it was the 
 call of God, on the Eleventh of April, 1778. I embarked 
 at Helvoef-duvs, and crossed over to the H igue, where 
 my friends with the utmost kindness, introduced me to 
 ihe prince of Orange in particular. He a»ked me many 
 questions concerning b >th my country and religion. 1 
 answered him with all simplicity, and he appeared well 
 satisfied. Soon after, 1 was made bn'gher of the town* 
 From thence I went to Leyden, Uelf, Rotterdam, D rt, 
 Haerlem, Amsterdam, Utrecht, and most of the other 
 chief cities in the United Provinces. In my journies 1 
 met with many persons, whom I believed to be the true 
 children of God. B>lif was a g ievnus cross, that we 
 could only speak a very fe v words to each other. Hav- 
 ing done my bu-iness, 1 returned by Helvoetsluys to 
 Harwich, and so to London. 
 
 On April 15. 1779, 1 embarked again for Holland, and 
 went thro' the same places 1 did the last year. And now 
 1 could converse a little in the dutch language. The fi-st 
 children of God that 1 found, were in the city of Haer- 
 lem. They came to my shop, and told me, the goods 
 were pretty: but 1 must take care, not to set my heart 
 upon them. 1 told them, my heart was in heaven, and 
 that these pretty things were under my feet. One of 
 them then invited me to his house, where 1 found a com- 
 pany assembled together. They received me with the 
 utmost courtesy, and asked, what religion I was of? I 
 answered, "Of that described in the 13th of the Corinth- 
 ians, from the fourth to the seventh verse," having read 
 the words, they said, "this is our religion too: we receive 
 yau as a brother." Tnev recommended me as such to all 
 their acquaintance, so that I was kindly received wher- 
 ever 1 came. And 1 found just thesims liberty of spirit 
 with these, as with my brethren in England. From this
 
 £94 KirnRiENeB or 
 
 time, 1 found all over the country, persons that knew anil 
 loved the gospel: and alter spending six month» coin- 
 fortublv among them, I cheei fully returnee) to my family. 
 
 1 went again the next spring, and was received with 
 the same kindness as before. And having more of the 
 language, I found out more and more of the chil- 
 dren of God. 1 rejoiced to find among the>e some of the 
 rich and great, v\ ho appeared to be a> humble as the 
 least of them. They were glad to hear, that there was a 
 peo tie in England that loved and served (J id. And 
 some of them iiad a great de-ire to settle a conespon- 
 deivce with their English biethren: which was noon after 
 effected, and has continued ever since, to the no small 
 comfort of Loth. 
 
 When I entered upon this trade, 1 had many discour- 
 agements. Mo-t of mv acquaintance either mocked or 
 pitied me, saying, I was the most improper person in the 
 wo! Id to be concerned in such a business*. And besides 
 1 had no money. 1 had indeed veiy little. Hut 1 believ- 
 ed God would bles- that little. And he sent me help in 
 time of need, so that money came just when it was want- 
 ed. One time I was shipping oil* a chest of goods, but 
 had not money to pay the duty. 1 told my wife, ''God 
 will provide." Presently a gentleman 1 never saw 
 before knocked at the door, and when he came in, told 
 me, lie wanted a parcel of goods, and would pay part of 
 the money then. He did so, and it was as much as 1 want- 
 ed to pay the duty on my chest. 
 
 It is now aoout fourteen years since 1 began, according 
 to my ability, to call sinners to lepentance. And I bless 
 God though I have had many discouragements, I am not 
 yet weary. 1 have not laboured in vain. God has given 
 me to see a little fruit of my labours. Blessed be his 
 name, he has washed me from my sins; and I know he is 
 able to keep me from falling, and to enable me to grow 
 in grace till ho receives me into his glory. 
 
 THE END.
 
 CONTENTS. 
 
 Mr. John Paws on, - § 
 
 Mr. John Haime, 23 
 
 Mr. John Murlin, .-...„_ 53 
 
 Mr. Christopher Hopper, - - - 79 
 
 Mr. John Oliver, 110 
 
 Mr. Alexander Mather, - - - - 123 
 Mr. Benjamin Rhodes, - - - - 152 
 Mr. Thomas Tennant, - - - - 161 
 
 Mr- William Hunter, 166 
 
 Mr. John Allen, --->.. 175 
 
 Mr. Thomas Hanson, 181 
 
 Mr. Thomas Hanby, 183 
 
 Mr. Thomas Lee, 2 2 
 
 Mr. George Story, 2 ; 5 
 
 3Ir. John Mason, 232 
 
 Mr. Thomas Mitchell, - - - - 237 
 Mr. Richard Whatcoat, - - - . 247 
 
 Mr. William Green, 252 
 
 Mr. Duncan Wright, 260 
 
 Mr Robert Wilkinson, - * - - 277 
 Mr. William Ferguson, - - . . 2b5 
 
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