kptain Kidd, Jr. :DA JOHNSON YOUNG FRENDft STANDARD ilifornia lonal ility SAMUEL FRENCH, 25 West 45th SU New York OP THE KITCHEN ,\ (farming comedy in 3 aets. Adapted by A. 1: of the same name by Alice Duer Miller. 6 males, 5 females. 3 interior scenes. Costumes, modern. Plays 2^/2 hours. The story of "Come Out of the Kitchen" is written nround a Virginia family of the old aristocracy, by the name of Dainger- field, who, finding themselves temporarily embarrassed, decide to rent their magnificent home to a rich Yanken. One of the con- ditions of the lease by the well-to-do New Englander stipulates :j,etej;t stuff of white servants should be engaged for journ at tio stately home. This servant question pr< Hies, and one of the daughtera of the family conceives the mad-cap idea that she, her sister and their two brothers shall act as the domestic staff for the v Yankee. Olivia Daingerfield, who is the ringleader in the : : -.', adopts the cognomen of Jane Allen, and elects to p tiie kitchen. Her sister, Elizabeth, i Uler brother, Paul, is the butler, and a group, is appointed to the position of oy. When Barton Crane arrives from the North, accom- hor daughter, and Crane's attorney, Tuckc > servants to possess so many methods cf behavior out of the ordinary that amusing complications begin to arl Olivia's charm and beauty impress Crane I the merry story continues through a i'ghtf::! incidents until the real identity of the heroine i'ut not until Crane has professed his love k, and the play ends with th> ; for those two young people, "f'orne Oat Ruth Chatterton in the leading iccess on its production by Henry Miller at ;e, New York. It was also a great success at the Strnnd : re, London. A most ingenious and entertaining comedy, and we strongly recommend it for amateur production. (Royalty, twenty-five dollars.) Price, 75 Cents. GOING SOME Play in 4 acts. By Paul Armstrong and Res Beach. 12 males, 4 females. 2 exteriors, 1 interior. Costumes, modern and cowboy. Plays a full evening. Described by the authors as the "chronicle of a certain lot of "allege men and girls, with a tragic strain of phonograph and cowboys." A rollicking good story, full of action, atmosphere, ;1 .y and drama, redolent of the adventurous spirit of youth. (Royalty, twenty-fiv-3 dollars.) Price, 75 Cents SAirrTEX, FEBKCH, 2S West 45th Street, New York City Captain Kidd, Jr. A FARCICAL ADVENTURE IN THREE ACTS BY RIDA JOHNSON YOUNG COPYRIGHT, 1916, BY Rn>A J. YOUNG COPYRIGHT, 1920, EV SAMUEL FRENCH All Rights Reserved CAUTION: Professionals and amateurs are hereby warned that "CAPTAIN KIDD, JR.," being fully protected under the copy- right laws of the United States of America, the British Empire, and all the other countries of the Copyright Union, is subject to a royalty and anyone presenting the play without the con- sent of the owners or their authorized agents will be liable to the penalties by law provided. Applications for the acting rights unuM be made to Samuel French. 25 West 45th Street. New York, N- Y. NEW YOK LONDON SAMUEL FRENCH | SAMUEL FRENCH. LTD PUBLISHES j 26 SOUTHAMPTON STREET 3fl WEST 45TH STBDT j STRAND, W.CS 'CAPTAIN KIDD, JR." All Rights Reserved Especial notice should be taken that the possession of this book without a valid contract for production first having been obtained from the publisher confers no right or license to professionals or amateurs to produce the play publicly or in private for gain or charity. In its present form this play is dedicated to the reacting public only, and no performance, representation, production, recitation, public reading or radio broadcasting may be given except by special arrangement with Samuel French, 25 West 45th Street, New York. This play may be presented by amateurs upon payment of a royalty of Twenty-five Dollars for each performance, pay- able to Samuel French, 25 West 45th Street, New York, one week before the date when the play is given. Whenever the play is produced the following notice must appear on all programs, printing and advertising for the play: "Produced by special arrangement with Samuel French of New York." Attention is called to the penalty provided by law for any infringement of the author's rights, as follows: "SECTION 4966: Any person publicly performing or repre- senting any dramatic or musical composition for which copy- right has been obtained, without the consent of the proprietor of said dramatic or musical composition, or his heirs and assigns, shall be liable for damages thereof, such damages in all cases to be assessed at such sum, not less than one hun- dred dollars for the first and fifty dollars for every subse- quent performance, as to the court shall appear to be just If the unlawful performance and representation be wilful and for profit, such person or persons shall be guilty of a mis- demeanor, and upon conviction shall be imprisoned for & period not exceeding one year." U. S. Revised Statute*: Tftle 60, Chap. 3. following Is a copy of the playbill of the flrmt rf onnance of "CAPTAIN KIDD. Jr." at the Cohan * Hariri* Theatre. New York City November 13. 1910. MESSRS. COHAN & HARRIS PRESENT Captain Kidd, Jr. A FARCICAL ADVENTURE IN THREE ACTS BY RIDA JOHNSON YOUNG Staged under the Direction of Sam Forrest THE CAST OF CHARACTERS (In the order of their first appearanlce) Andrew MacTavish Ernest Stallard An Expressman Westcott B. Clarke Mary MacTavish Edith Taliaferro Jim Anderson Otto Kruger George Brent .Lincoln Plumer Marian Fenton Adele Rolland William Carleton Charles Brown Lemuel Bush Edward Snader Luella Bush Zelda Sears Samuel Dickens Charles Dow Clark Greyson Elmer Grandin Green Surveyors 1 Alf De Corsey Brown \ . , . .Olney Morgan Solomon Shears George Flint ..., -4 . .....Danby Dillon SYNOPSIS ACT L MACTAVISH & COMPANY, The Book Shop (Wait Eight Minutes) ACT H. CAPE COD. A few days later. (Wait Ten Minutes) ACT m. SAME AS ACT I. A few days later. TIME. The present PLACE. New York and Cape Cod Captain Kidd, Jr. SCENE*. An old book shop on 4/A Avenue, down town, New York. When the door is opened one can see the stone steps leading tip to the street. The door x. of c. DISCOVERED : At rise of curtain ANDREW MAC- TAVISH is discovered reading at table L. R. of it. The door opens R. c. and an EXPRESSMAH enters, carrying a large wooden box. MAC, absorbed in his book, does not look up. EXPRESSMAN. (Upstairs c. at door IL c.) Hey, where'll I put this ? MACTAVISII. (Looks up} Eh? EXPRESSMAN. Where do you want the box ? MACTAVISH. What is it, man? EXPRESSMAN. Ain't you MacTavish and Com- pany? MAC-TAVISH. Aye, I'm MacTavish. The *- 5 6 CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. pany is out. EXPRESSMAN. (Dumps the box on chest down JL) Well, here's the box of books you bought at the Carleton auction. $5.25 collect. MACTAVISH. Dearie, me, dearie me, the boy's been at it again ! (Crosses to cash drawer in desk on counter u. c.) EXPRESSMAN. Seventy-five cents's fer haulin' it MACTAVISH. Whatever will Mary say to this! (Finds the drawer locked) I'm sorry, but my part- ner is out and has the keys to the cash drawer. Will ye stop by later? EXPRESSMAN. I can't do that; there's only one delivery a day. MACTAVISH. Well, I'm thinkin' you'll have to be taicin' the box back, then. EXPRESSMAN. Take it back! Whereto? Auc- tions don't take nothing back. MACTAVISH. (Comes down L. c.) Well, I'm sure I don't know what to say. MARY. (Enters c.) Hello, Grand-daddy! (Turns to EXPRESSMAN as MAC motions toward him) What is it, Grand-daddy? MACTAVISH. (To the EXPRESSMAN) This i* the Company. EXPRESSMAN. (To MAPY) Oh, is that so? Well, then you can pay me five-twenty-five. MARY. Five dollars and twenty-five cents! MACTAVISH. It's a big box of books,. Mary. MARY. Books? But we've bought no books. EXPRESSMAN. You ain't! (Opens order book) Well, what's this then? (Reads) "Box o' mis'llane- ous books and pamphlets unopened. Bought by MacTavish and Company, per J. A." $5.25 collect MACTAVISH. I fear me Jim's been at it again Mary. It's from the Carleton auction. CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. 7 I! MARY. (Goes R. and looks at books) Well, 111 not accept it. ' EXPRESSMAN. (Goes to c.) Now see here, Miss, you can't go sending people to auctions and then rtsnig on it. 1 MARY. But we sent no one. : EXPRESSMAN. Well, then who's this 'Ter J. AL?" MARY. He has no authority to act for us. He's supposed to be a friend of my grandfather's. You can take them right back. MACTAVISH. (As the EXPRESSMAN looks at Him) He's my adopted son, like. MARY. (Indignantly, as she moves to H. of MAC) Your adopted son ! He's nothing of the sort. I'm surprised at you, Grand-daddy ! EXPRESSMAN. Now wait a minute! You folks will have to settle your family history among your- selves; this is my busy day. MARY. Well, don't let me detain you. MACTAVISH. Ye'd better pay him, Mary; it's best to be rid of him. MARY. (As she crosses to back of counter) It's an outrage, but I suppose we'll have to do it. MACTAVISH. (R. Corner) It'll be the last time, Mary. I'll give Jim a good talkin' to. MARY. You needn't bother, I'll attend to that. (To EXPRESSMAN) How much did you say it was? EXPRESSMAN. (Going up to counter) Five dollars and twenty-five cents. (Looking at his order book) MARY. Here's your money. EXPRESSMAN. Not mine, lady; far be it from such! Sign here, please. (Counts the money as MARY signs order book) Five twenty-five. (MARY hands him the book) Say, don't I git no thin' fer luggin' that all the way down town? MARY. Yes, you got exercise. S CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. EXPRESSMAN. (As he goes up R. c.) Rah, rak, rah! Votes fer women! ((Exits c.) 4l . MACTAVISH. (Goes R.) Oh, Mary, ye should na be bandyin' words wi' him. MARY. (Crossing to L. front of counter) I know I shouldn't, but I coudn't resist it. Aijd I shouldn't be short with you either, old dear, about Jim. But that useless box of trash was just aboul the last straw this morning. (Go es to L. c.) MACTAVISH. What's the matter, Mary ? (Go*.\ to R. of her both L. c.) , MARY, I've been to see the landlord. MAC. It's true, then ? Larrabee's going to raise the rent? ,; MARY. Yes, almost double. They're going to level the sidewalks and he's going to put tine new fronts on all the shops. MAC (Crosses and sits R. of table) Dear, dear, whatever will we do now? MARY. (Over to back of him) Now, Grand- daddy, remember what you make us say when filings go wrong! (Recites) "The inner side of every cloud Is bright and shining, I, therefore turn the clouds about And always wear them inside out To show the lining." (Laughs and goes c.) Grand-daddy, with the side- walks leveled and the shop practically on the ground floor, if you'd let me put in some new fiction and some foreign works and advertise a little MAC. Now, Mary, I'm glad to gi' ye a free hand wi' the business, but there's one thing I'm firm about I'll no' let ye spend one penny of thjt two thousand dollars your mother left ye except for a wedding outfit. MARY. Well, it'll stay in the bank forever then. CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. 9 because I'm going to be an old maid. (Takes of her hat and savagely digs the hatpin into it) . , MAC. (Rises and goes to L. c.,) A little old maid, eh? What's come between you and our Jim, lass ? MARY. Our Jim, indeed . l Your Jim. He's noth- ing to me. Besides, what has he to do with my being an old maid? ,,,,, MAC. He has nothin' to do wi' it, but I'm thinkin' he'll have something to say against it. You know, before you went away to school yoji and Jim were verra thick. MARY. That was only childish nonsense, Grand- daddy. (Moves over R.) MAC. The lad still wears the little ring ye gal* him on his watch-chain. MARY. Well, Jim was all right a few years ago, but when I came back from college he'd grown so He was a man ! He had a moustache. MAC. Well, lass, he could hardly help growin* and he took off the moustache when he found ye didna like it. MARY. He expected me to kiss him the first day I came back before he'd found out if I evep cared. Fresh ! So sure of himself and of me! He didn't seem to realize that I was a young ladf and that I might have something to say. No, he thought all he had to do was to whistle and J'4 come running. (JiM is heard whistling off-stage) MAC. There's Jim's whistle now. Bless the boy! MARY. He's always whistling. Well, he can't whistle for me! (Tosses her head and exits i*fy room L.) JIM. (Comes running down the steps and into the shop to c. Leave door open) Hi. MacTavis^ it's a fine day! How's your soul? 10 CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. MAC. (Looking toward room L.) 'Ssh! JIM. What's the matter? MAC. The company's no' pleased wi' ye, lad. JIM. That's nothing new. What have I done now? (As MAC points to box of books, JIM goes over R.) Oh, the books! They've come. Let** open the box and see what the prize package con- tains. (Begins to tear the paper from the box) MAC. You shouldna' have bought the books, Jim. You know Mary objects to auctions, especi- ally sight-unseen packages. JIM. The trouble with Mary is she has no imagination. There's no telling what we may find here. (Over to MAC) Don't you remember the time we found a I7th Century edition of Shake- speare in a bunch of old junk that nobody else would look at? MAC. Yes, bat that was only once. And remem- ber the money we wasted on book auctions before Mary came into the business. (Crosses to c.) JIM. (Crossing to R.) Well, didn't we have our fun out of it? The gamble is what makes life in- teresting. Why, it's as thrilling as a grab-bag at a strawberry festival. There's no telling what we may draw out of here. (MARY enters from L.) Old documents, lost wills, rare editions. MARY. It would be a good idea if you could draw some of Grand-daddy's lost money out of it. 'JiM. Oh, hello, Company! How's your soul this beautiful day? Mine's bubblin'! (Removes his cup and puts it in his pocket) MARY. (MAC gets to L. goes to c.) Jim Ander- son, I want to remind you for the last time that you have no connection with this business. JIM. (Goes to c. to MARY) Well, I'm glad if* York than Jersey City. (Both laugh) But some day I'm going to strike it rich (Crosses and pwts his arm affectionately about MAC) and then I guess we'll see the world, eh, Mac ? MAC. (Throws his arm around Jim's shoulder) Of course! You'll get there, lad, ye have a rare talent. JIM. Rare! That's the word unbaked as yet. (Goes up stage to e. door) MAC. How about your novel, Jim? Have ye heard from Scribner's? JIM. Oh> Gee! Have I heard! (Down to R. of MAC) It's back from Scribner's a week ago and on its travels again. That book has been going back and forth like that for months. I tell you, Mac; the United States Post-office is being sup- ported by that book of mine. (Both laugh) MAC. Don't lose your courage, Jim, it's a great work. JIM. Oh, they can't down me. Somebody's going to take it some day. It's being improved by travel. (Both laugh. JIM starts for door, MAC up to counter then comes down to L. door, opens it and Mttgs) Farewell, Annie Laurie. Think over that Ook book proposition. MARY. ( Off stage L. ) Mind yoar own businese, Anderson! JIM. Sure, it's a sharp tongue, But a god Hart; has Mary. See you later, Mac. (Exits p j$r ftairs and off R. taking book with him) itf AC crosses to R. of desk, picks vp * book wl jrf*r reading as BRENT enters* MAC rises * Ar kcars the door open.) CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. 17 BRENT. (Enters c.) Good afternoon. MAC. Good afternoon. BRENT. Is this MacTavish and Company? MAC. Aye, I'm MacTavish. The Company is in the room beyond. BRENT. You bought a box of books at the Carle- ton auction yesterday. MAC. Eh? BRENT. Didn't you buy a box of books at the Carleton auction yesterday? MAC. Yes, but BRENT. Where is it? MAC. (Points to box R.) Why, that's the box, but BRENT. (Crossing to box R.) Fine! That's great ! Well, I want to buy it back. MAC. Eh? BRENT. I want to buy it back. How much do you want for it? MAC. Well, I'll have to consult the Company, sir. BRENT. Please hurry, I haven't any time to waste. MAC. One moment, sir. (Goes to door L. and calls) Mary ! Mary ! MARY. ( Off stage L. ) Yes, Granddaddy ? MAC. Here's a gentleman wants to talk to you afeput the books from the Carleton auction. MARY. (Enters L.) What? MAC. (As MARY crosses to R. of him) A gen- D, JR. JIM. You will, eh? (Kisses her) MARY. I'll never speak to you again as long as I live! JIM. You won't, eh?- (Takes her in his arms and kisses her again. She turns from him, cry- ing) Aw, can't you take a joke? MARY. Joke? Joke! (Goes to MAC and buries her head on his shoulder} MAC. There, there, child, he was only f oolin'. MARY. I'll never speak to him again as long as I'live! (JiM laughs) I won't! I won't! (Crosses and sits L. of desk) JIM. Not speak to me ! You couldn't resist it ! I'll bet you don't stick it out a day. MARY. Is that so! Well, we'll see! JIM. You're speaking to me now! MARY. I'm not! Granddaddy, make him stop! (Both quarrel ad lib until CARLETON enters. As JIM turns to MARY he bumfs into CARLETON. He looks at him a moment, then goes over R.) CARLETON. (Enters and comes down R. c.) Dear me, dear me ! (Sprays his handkerchief with an atomiser) What an unsanitary place! Books from all sorts of out-of-the way places! Whew! Full of germs and dust ! MARY. (Crosses to L. of CARLETON) I don't think you'll find much dust here, sir. I go over the books twice a week. CARLETON. You should sterilize them. MARY. Well, if youVe come to see about selling some, sir, I'll be very careful about those. CARLETON. Oh, I haven't come to sell. (Takes a fiowder from wallet in his pocket) Would you mind if I burned one of these fumigating powders? MARY. I most certainly should. CARLETON. (As MARY wipes her eyes) Pardon me, but are you in grief ? ' CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. 33 MARY. (As JIM laughs) No. I have a cold. CARLETON. It is well known that old books are active agents in spreading contagion. MARY. Have you any business with us? *** CARLETON. Well, yes, I have. My name is Carfe^ ton, William Carteton. My grandfather this is MacTavish and Company, isn't it? MAC. (R. c.) Aye, I'm MacTavish. (Indicates MARY) This is the Company. MARY. (As CARLETON looks at her) Yes. CARLETON. Dear me! Well, they tell me that you bought a box of books at the auction of my grandfather's affects yesterday. It was a box of books that were stored in the attic. Now, attics are terrible breeding places for germs of all kinds horrible, poisonous creatures. It has been proven by statistics that MAC. Yes, but how about the books, sir? JIM. Yes, what about the books? MARY. Let me get this straight. You found a letter of instructions from your grandfather tell- tng you not to dispose of any of the books, parti- cularly those that were stored in the attic, didn't you? CARLETON. Why, how could you know that? MARY. Your cousin, or uncle, or whatever he was, was just here with the same story. CARLETON. But I have no relatives. I am the ole surviving member of the Carleton family ! i JIM. Oh, I sect CARLETON. You see, my grandfather left me enferything he possessed with the sole provision that I obey the instructions contained in a letter which was to be opened after his death, and the particular instructions were that I was not to sell any of his books. < JIM. What was the idea? CARLETON. Well, I think he knew that I'd dis- #| CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. pose of that box of books in the attic. Why, i would no more have breathed the accumulated store of dust in that attic than I would have jumped from the Times Building, and I wouldn't jump from the .Times Building for well, I wouldn't jump from the Times Building for well, I wouldn't jump from the Times Building. MAC. Yes, yes, but what about the books ? CARLETON. Well, among the books there was one, partly manuscript, about buried treasure. I'd like to get that book back. ", JIM. (Crossing to L. of MARY) Mary, this is the .genuine heir, I feel it. MARY. (Turns L. to MAC) Granddaddy, will you please tell the gentleman on my right that if he has anything to say he will communicate it through you? CARLETON. I beg your pardon! : . JIM. (To CARLETON.) That's all right, ,she itaeans me. (Goes R.) MAC. (Over to R. of CARLETON) Yo you really :believe there is anything in this story of buried treasure ? GARLETON. Oh, there must be something in it fit's been understood in the family that my grand- father possessed some such secret. ; 'JiM. r Do you know what's happened? She sold the books just half an hour ago. CARLETON. (To MARY) You sold them? - MARY. Yes. -. ' CARLETON. Dear me, that's too bad \ Well, well ! (Starts upstage c.) .' -JiM. (Brings CARLETON downstage) You're 'hot going to give up like that, are you? Say, you ought to follow that crook up. . CARLETON. How can I f olldw him up ? I haven't any idea who he is. CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. 3$ MARY. Well, you know the girl, don't you? He said she was old Mr. Carleton's secretary. ...:,'j (Ftesh.) CARLETON. What, Miss Fenton ! Was she small, pretty and dark and very beautiful? MARY. No! JIM. Yes! MARY. No ! JIM. Yes. What about her? CARLETON. Why, I can't believe that Miss Fen- ton would MAC. Did the young lady know about the trea- sure book ? CARLETON. Why, yes. It was she and I who found the letter about it this morning when we were clearing out my grandfather's desk. < JIM. Well, she slipped one over on you. >< CARLETON. Oh, yes, she was very much at* tached to me. In fact, we were provisionally en- gaged to be married. MARY. Mr. Carleton, I'm afraid those people with that man and they've got the book. CARLETON. In a taxi ! With a man ! Dear me I What was he like ? JIM. A great big fellow, heavy set, smooth face. (Ready lights.) CARLETON. Why, that sounds like a man who called at the house this morning enquiring about thy grandfather's books. He had a long talk with 4tiss Fenton and she seemed much disturbed. ;: JIM. They've cooked up a scheme together t get that treasure book away from you. CARLETON. Dear me, dear me! Well, well! That's too bad. (Stars up c.) JIM. (Brings CARLETON downstage c. ayah) Say, wait a minute! You're not to give up like that, are you ? CARLETON. What would you do about it? JIM. I'd follow them up and get the book back CARLETON. But you see I er have no money to speak of. If I don't hold on to the book and spend at least a year looking for the treasure I'm to lose all the rest of my grandfather's for tune. JIM. Oh, so that's the joker! MARY. Wait a minute. I have an idea! Mr Carleton, your grandfather was a man of brains T * he said there was buried treasure on Cape Cod, I believe him. JIM. So do I. MARY. (To CARLETON) Now then; if we fin anced you to follow up these people and go after the treasure, would you share with us? (Warning.) CARLETON. Do you mean that you'll go with me and help me find the treasure? MARY. Yes, we'll all of us go. CARLETON. And you'll finance the expedition - 1 MARY. Yes. CARLETON. By Jove, I'll do it ! MARY. Fine ! > JIM. That's the stuff! MAC. But where'll we get the money from? MARY. Granddaddy, we've got one hundred dol lars in the bank and seventy dollars in the cash drawer from the man who bought the books. JIM. That'll get us up there. ' MAC. But how about the business? MARY. We'll retire from it temporarily. .- CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. # JIM. (Crosses to MARY and grasps htr hands) Mary, that's a great scheme ! (He holds her hands until she speaks) MARY. (Crosses to MAC) Granddaddy, there's a certain person who said I had no imagination. We'll show him whether I have or not. We've got a month in which to move. This shop closes to- night. We'll give two weeks to the search for this buried treasure, and if we don't find it we'll come back with nothing lost but a hundred and seventy dollars and two weeks' business. CARLETON. Splendid ! JIM. Oh, Mac, we can't do it. They've got tbe manuscript and chart. MARY. And did you think I believed that man's story? (To CARLETON) They may have the book, hut I had the good sense to take out the manuscript and the chart! JIM. Oh, Mac, she's a little Scotch wonder! CARLETON. A thousand thanks. What shall we do first? (Shades. Lights down.) JIM. 'Ssh< Wait a minute! Mary, light that candle. (MARY lights the candle and places it on chest) Carleton, pull over that trunk. (CARLE- TON drags the chest to c.) Mac, draw down that shade. (He pulls down the shade over the door, while MAC draws down other shade. The stage is in darkness except for the light cf the candle. JIM puts the chart on -the chest and all l&seel around it) Nobody must see this chart but our- selves. MARY. (Tracing words on chart) First it say* you "go to Swampset." JIM. And then we go to the Bush farm. MAC. Then you come to an apple orchard 38 CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. CARLETON. And then a big rock. MARY. That must be the rock. CARLETON. "Where T. is buried." JIM. "T'V That means treasure. " Where two sailors were killed defending T." ALL. (In a loud whisper) " Where two sailors were killed defending T." Curtain. ACT TWO. SCENE: The scene is laid at the back of an old farmhouse on Cape Cod in the midst of an old apple orchard. This orchard is dug up as far back as one can see: At L. of the house is the stage. R. u. is an old weather beaten shanty. Below the shanty is a rain barrel. A path goe$ across stage from R. u. to L. u. DISCOVERED: As the Curtain rises JIM is vigor- ously wielding a pick at hole c., MARY is digging 'at. a hole up R., MACTAVISH is dig- ging up L. and CARLETON is working at a hole downstage L. CARLETON. (Picks up a handful of soil and ex- arAinef it) This is very rich soil. ALL! 'Sssh! JIM. For the love of Mike, Carleton, dig! CARLETON., (Resentfully) I only stopped for a moment. T' think after you've driven me for two days with . my extremities doubled up in the earth I'm entitled to straighten up and get the kinks out of my back. JIM. , It's all. your fault that we have to dig like this, isn't it? We've dug tip the whole place CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. 39 except that one little patch out there, and it's all your fault. If you hadn't lost that chart MAC. (Up L.) Now, now, Jim, don't begin on that again. You know Mr. Carleton didna' lose the chart purposely. CARLETON. I didn't lose the chart. I tell you my wallet must have been taken from my pocket at the barber's. And I had a dozen of those fumi- gating powders in it, too. JIM. To hell with your fumigating powders ! MARY. (Comes down R. c.) Ji Granddaddy. Will you speak to Mr. Anderson? JIM. I beg your pardon, but it gets my goat. Here he's lost something worth ten millions of dol- lars and all he thinks pf is his damn - MARY. Granddaddy > ' " woW JIM. His fumigating powders! (To MARY) You shouldn't have left him in charge of it in fhe first place. MARY. (Crosses downstage to CARLETON) Mr. Carleton, the chart was yours. I though it only right that you should have it. (Goes upstage R.) CARLETON. Well, I can't see that the loss is ir- reparable. We've found the place. All we've got to ! do is to keep excavating. : JIM. We found it ! I hope you don't take any Credit to yourself for that. ' CARLETON. Do you know I don't believe this orchard is the original one. Statistics show that owing to the action of parasitical fungi r * jfiM. Oh, hire a hall, Carleton, we've got to work ! . CARLETON. It's all very well for.ypu, Anderson', Vbu, can work with enthusiasm^ You haven't hahe won't give in. (Ad lib between the two') MAC. Children, children, your verses. (Recto* the fir'st two lines, then MARY and JIM finish) " The inner side of every cloud Is bright and shining So let us turn our clouds about And always wear them inside out To show the lining." (MARY and MAC go back to their former places) JIM. You know darn well she hasn't spoken to me, and it's a rotten shame. (To CARLKTOK) What are you looking at? Go on and dig! (Throws a 'shovelful of earth at CARLETON) We're getting slack, terribly slack. MARY. Slack! I'll leave it to you, Granddaddy, if we don't do most of the digging while Ji f mean, Mr. Anderson, does all the talking. : JIM. Well, I have to. There's got to be a leader here, and I tell you right now that if you don't follow my instructions our landlady is going to get wise to what we're digging for. We can fool dbe old man, but she's nobody's innocent lamb. CAPTAIN KIDD, JR 41 MAC. It's late in life for me to learn to be a. play actor, Jim. JIM. Oh, I don't mean you, Mac, it's Mary and Carleton. They don't put any ginger into this g*eo- logy business. CARLETON. Why, it was I who suggested the subterfuge. JIM. Yes, and then you let it flop. Look at the words I've coined trying to convince them I'm a scientist. Why, I've almost convinced myself. MARY. (Comes down to R. of JIM) You know, I don't think our landlady is (Catches herself and crosses to R. of CARLETON) I don't think our land- lady is the worst we have to fear. There's that nosey constable always hanging around watching us. CARLETON. That's what I say. What is he watch ing us for? MARY. Then there are those men we saw stir veying. What are they doing here? JIM. I've got a hunch they've found the chart MAC. (Comes down L.) Do you think so ? JIM. Sure, Mac. MARY. Granddaddy, I think we ought to boy this place and warn everybody off. MAC. But we have no money to buy anything, child. You know MacTavish and Company spent its last dollar financing this wild expedition. JIM. You won't say that when you get the treas ure, Mac. MARY. I have the two thousand dollars toy mother left me. CARLETON. Yes, but they want twenty-five hun- dred for the place. . MARY. (To CARLETON) I think I could get it lor two thousand cash. MAC. Now, Mary, I've let you children hate your way about comin* here, and a wild expedition 4* CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. ft is, but I'll no' stand by and see you spend the last penny ye have in the world on such worthless Deposition as this farm. 'MARY. It's my own money. My mother left it to. me to do exactly what I like with it. LUELLA. (Inside the hou'se) For the land's sake, Lem, go on outside. I don't want you hang- ing onto my apron strings all day. LEM. (Inside house) All right, Luelly! JIM. Ssh! Geologize! (He jumps into hole, picks up a handful of earth and pretends to be ex- amining it) MARY. (Runs upstage R,, jumps into hole and picks up handful of earth) Granddaddy! Geolo- gize! MAC. (Has gone upstage L.) Eh? MARY. Geologize! MAC. Oh, yes ! (All pick up handfuls of earth and stand examining them as LEM enters L. ) LEM. . (Enters from house and stands on porch) Seems to me geologizin's mighty wearin' business. Glad I wasn't eddicated to it. (Comes down to L. o^JiM) Found any val'able specimens yet ? (MAC crosses upstage and down R. to corn crib and sits) JIM. Good morning, my good man ! Well, we've found a little stratified cosmoditious and a few uni- form pefciflages, but otherwise we haven't made much progress here. We are thinking of pursuing our investigations in the next amphibious section. (CARLETON laughs. JIM looks angrily at him, then gathers up a few stones as if to throw them at him) LEM. My, my ! Funny how a feller kin live in a place all his life and not know what he's a step- ping' on. (Goes upstage R. u. to shanty for his scythe) I don't see why you folks always stop diggin' when I come 'round. You pay good for the privileges and it don't hurt me none to see you "<'" ' v work. CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. 4J LUELLA. (Enters from house and stands on the porch with a glass of wine and a napkin in her hand) No, that's the last thing ever hurts you, Lem Bush, settin' round and watchin' other folks work. You been busy at it ever since we was married. LEM. What you want to do, Luelly, make a show of me ? LUELLA. A show of you! Wisht I could. I'd set you up on a platform and label you the laziest man on earth. Maybe that way you'd bring in some money. (Comes down from the porch and crosses to MAC R. CARLETON crosses over to MARY up R.) Here, Mr. MacTavish, I brought you out this glass of elderberry wine. I can't abide to see you work so hard in this heat. . MAC. That's verra kind, Mrs. Bush, thank you. It is warm. LUELLA. Yes, it is humid. Here, I'll take your dirt? MAC. Oh yes, thank you. (Hands her the earth and takes the glass of wine. . LUELLA crosses to L.) JIM. Ah, MacTavish, it's a talkin' way ye have wi' the ladies. Nobody ever brings me coolin' drink. LUELLA. Well, young man, I guess the way yqu work your tongue keeps your mouth from gettin* dry. (MARY laughs and comes downstage R. LEM sits at grindstone) . MAC. (Crosses to LUELLA and hands her .tfa wine-glass) Thank you, : Mrs. Bush, that was vena refreshin'. (Starts up L.) LUELLA. Don't mention it. Here's your dirt. MAC. Eh? :. LUELLA. Your dirt your geology specimen, {Hands him the earth. Then wipes glass with nap- kin) Old Mr. Henry used to like that wine,, too, 44 CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. Mr. MacTavish. You do remind me so of him. MAC. Who was this old Mr. Henry ye speak of so often? I've been much interested in the books he left there in the shanty. LUELLA. Oh, he was just an old gentleman who used to come up here to board every summer. He put up that little shanty for himself. Had some queer notion of sleepin' with his windows wide op- en, so of course we couldn't have him in the house. (LEM goes into corn crib with scythe) JIM. Of course not ! LUELLA. He used to go diggin' around jest like you people. ALL. (Rushing over to LUELLA) What! Dig- ging around ! What do you mean ? LUELLA. (Jumps nervously) Mercy! What do you mean, hatchin' me up like that! You folks has got awful startlin' ways. JIM. This fellow, this old man you say he was a geologist too? LUELLA. I don't know nothin' about that, but I do know that many a night I seen old Mr. Henry out with a lantern diggin' around. (LEM enters from corn crib) CARLETON. Mr. Henry? LEM. Henry was his first name. (All rush over to LEM) He give it us when he first come and jest stuck to it. LUELLA. Lem, he told you not to tell that. LEM. Oh, what's the difference ; poor old feller's dead now. He was a writin' man and was up here tor peace and quiet. (To CARLETON) I was goin' to ask you before if he was any relation of yours. Has the same name as you Carleton, it was, Henry C. Carleton. MAC. What, Henry C. Carleton! These must be his books. Well, well ! (Goes into shanty. Gets mbook and sits in the chair reading) CAPTAIN KIDD, Jk. 4* CAKLETON. Why, it must have been my grand- father. He never v/ou!d tell us where he went in the summer. MARY and JIM. 'Sh ! LUELLA. (To CARLETON) My land, your GRANDFATHER! YOU, Mr. Henry's grand- son. (CARLETON grins) And him so good lookin' and sensible! (LEM sits on sack down R.) MARY. (Crossing over to LUELLA) You say he used to dig in this place, what for? (JiM and CARLETON follow MARY over L.) LUELLA. Well, of course he didn't dig so ener- getic as you folks do. Jest used to patter around m his favorite spots. JIM. {Pushing MARY aside) Where? How? What do you mean, favorite spots? LUELLA. Oh, jest here and there. LEM. His up and dyin' was an awful disap- pointment to us. He was goin' to buy this farm. ALL. Buy it! LUELLA. (Jumps nervously} My land, you got me so nervous I'm all of a twitter ! Yes, buy it! He writ us last year to have the deed drawned tap and we done it. Lem and me signed the papers, and there they are now a layin' in my sideboard drawer awaitin' the hand that is gone and the roice that is stilled. (Sniffs and wipes her nose with the napkin) CARLETON. (c.) Well, if my grandfather wanted to buy this place, that confirms MARY and JIM. 'Sh! LUELLA. (Startled) My God, don't do that! What's the matter with you folks! JIM. Nothing, Mrs. Bush. Did you say/ he wanted to buy this farm? LUELLA. Ain't no doubt he did want to buy it but I reckon that was too good luck to happen to me. I guess Til have to go drudgin' along 46 CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. '(Gives LEM a sour look) Draggin' Lem after tree till I drop in my tracks. (Starts for house) . LEM. Oh, women is always lookin' for trouble LUELLA. (As she goes up the steps) Ha! I didn't have to look for no trouble. I found mine when I married you. (Exits into house L.) JIM. (Rushes over to LEM, MARY and CARLE TON following) See here, Mr. Bush, we can make it worth your while if you can show us where old Carleton used to dig. LEM. He done his diggin' mostly at night when I was asleep, and when I sleep I pay attention to it. (MARY and JIM go upstage looking for holes) Come to think of it, you are some like the old gentle man. He drunk and washed in rain water, he did, 'fraid of ketchin' things from our well just like you. We had to put up that rain barrel for him (Points to barrel up R.) CARLETON. Indeed ! JIM. Mac! Mary, come here ! Carleton! (Alt gather about JIM, down L.) Listen! Old Mr Carleton used to dig around here (They put their heads together and talk in undertones) SAM. (Enters thru gate c. from L. and comes tp up c.) Mornin', city folks. (All jump at the sound of his voice, and return to tfyeir former digging places. Business of SAM following them, LEM rises as SAM enters) LEM. (Up R. c.) My time, Constable, you here again! (SAM dears his throat, signalling LEM ,ty keep quiet) JIM. Good morning, Mr. Constable. So we're going to have the pleasure of your society again today? (Pretend to be examining something he picks out of hole) SAM. (L.) Oh, I dunno. Thought I'd jest have a look in LEM. Well, my land, three times you been 6\jf CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. tf here, this week and never a visit from you all winter before. SAM. Hm! (Signals frantically to LEM to keep quiet, then comes down to L. of JIM) What kind of a jigger have you got there? JIM. That isn't a jigger, my friend. That's a gazibiator. SAM. What's a gazibiator? JIM. Family of gazosas. (Rises, taking his pick with him) Now, if you kind people will ex- cuse us we'll retire to the next strata and endeavor to find the ding fiddle de hoot nanny that retaliates on his animal. Come, Carleton, come, Mary ! (Ex- its R. SAM stands eyeing CARLETON suspiciously as the latter sneaks off R. and off) MARY. Come, granddaddy! MAC. Eh? MARY. We'll need your advice on this, Grand- daddy. (Exits R.) MAC. (Looks vaguely around at LEM and SAM, then picks up a handful of earth and starts R.) Oh, yes! (Exits R.) LEM. (To SAM as he comes down R. c.) I wisht you'd tell me what you're a watchin' 'em for? SAM. Ain't heard the news, hev you? LEM. What news? SAM. They's been a burglary over at the Swamp- set Savings Bank. LEM. No ! SAM. Yep. LEM. Why ain't you on the job? SAM. The authorities ain't askin' their own con- . stable what's what. Sent to Bostin' for detectives, they hev. LEM. Well, Sam, I wouldn't stand for it^Tain't fair; special after you jailin' them chicken thieves last spring. 48 CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. : SAM. Yes, an' two drunks and disorderlies thifc winter. But I ain't saying nothing. I guess I'll give them Boston detectives a surprise. (Sneaks upc.) LEM. (Crosses to L.) What you gonner do? SAM. (Back to LEM) Lem, I hate to gin you a shock, but the burglars of the Swampset Say- ings Bank is a playin': round in your back yard this very minute. LEM. What, them geologizers! SAM. Geologizers nothin ! Lem, if my suspicions is kerrect an' they generally be them people ain't only thieves, they's murderers and worse. (Ready horn.) LEM. Look here, Sam, look here! You ain't goin' to arrest them on my premises. SAM. There's two thousand dollars reward in this, and if you help me you get ha ha a third. Now there's nothin' for you to get nervous about. Fll attend to the arrestin' when it comes. All I want you to do is to keep your eyes open, 'cause I gotter have proof. , LEM. Oh, you ain't got no proof. SAM. I got circumstantial evidence, but that don't hold in law. What I want is proof, ironbound proof, I don't want to make no mistakes. (Sneaks up R. looks off, then comes back to LEM) LEM. What do y~u mean you got circumstan- tial evidence? , SAM. These here people comes to Swampset three days ago and afore they come to you they put up at the Grand Hotel. LEM. Yes ? SAM. Well, the gal and the old man set on the porch of the hotel all day, but the young feller and Carleton jes' hung around the Post Office and the barber shop askin' fool questions about the property hereabouts and pretendin' to look up title deeds in the Court House, but what they was really doin', Lem, was lookin' fer a hidin' place. LEM. My time! SAM. Now here comes the worst! Long about noon the first day Anderson goes up to the bank bold as brass and asked to be shown a safe deposit vault and the biggest box they had. He talked good so Meecham took him down and showed him. the whole place, and all Anderson did was to say that "mebbe he'd be wantin' a couple of boxes in a day or two.'' LEM. Did he calkerlate to hide the loot from the bank in their own vaults? SAM. Can't ye see through it? He didn't want no box he only wanted to git a look around. LEM. I see! SAM. I had a reason independent of their queer doin's for thinkin' them folks was up to something criminal. I was waitin' for it and it come. Last night the burglary was did. (Sneaks up R., looks off, then comes back to LEM) LEM. By Caesar! (SAM falls into c. hole) An- derson did go to town last night. SAM. Don't tell me, I seen him. LEM. He said they lost something in the barber shop and he was goin' to inquire if it had been found. SAM. I should say he did lost something in the barber shop, and I found it. An' what I found is my original reason for suspicionin' 'em! (Goes uf L. looks around, then comes back to LEM) LEM. What were it ? SAM. This. (Takes CARLETON'S wallet from his pocket) That there Carleton's wallet. & CAPTAIN KIBD, JR. LEM. My time, Sam, you didn't steal it off of him! SAM. I had a right. I been readin' in the New Ytork papers about Mr. Burns tappin' the tele- phone wires to get evidence, an' they was actin' suspicious and I had a right to collect evidence. His coat was a hangin' over my head in the barber shop air' this was a-stickin' out so that a little jiggle brought it down. (Opens the wallet and shows the fumigating powders) What do you make of this ? Lots of little powders done up in papers and marked as plain as day, " Poison " ! LEM. Poison ! SAM. Wait, there's worse to come. (Takes out the chart) Here's a map, or something, and be hanged if they haven't had the impidence to keep count of where they buried their victims. LEM. Victims! SAM. 'Sh! Look a here. (Reads from the chart) "Where two sailors was killed defending T." (Looks cautiously off a.) And here. "Where T. is buried." LEM. T. My time, do you suppose it could be Thompson what disappeared last spring? SAM. I don't know who it means, but they've buried a feller and killed a couple of sailors, that's enough to hang 'em for life. Now, Lem, they're going to bury that money out there alongside their victims and I got to see them doin' it. LEM. (Runs up L.) Luelly! SAM. (Runs up R. with horn) 'Sh ! Don't say a word to Luelly or she'll let out a screech an' then we'll all be murdered. (Starts R.) I'm going to do a little snoopin' around. (Exits R. Auto horn) LEM. (Starts for house L., then as auto horn is heard off L. he runs up to gate, looks off, then turns s. and calls) Sam ! Sam ! Come back here. Sam. SAM. (Enters R.) What's that? CAPTAIN KJDD, JR. $1 LEM. It's a ottymobile. They's a stranger get- tin' out. Well, he ain't goin' to git in here. {Starts for the house L..) SAM. Be keerful what you say. Mebbe he's one of them detectives fellers. Better let_me do the talkin'. BRENT. (Entrs thru gate c. Grip) Good morn ing, gentlemen. SAM. Good morning. BRENT. (Looks around at the holes) Ah, ha! (Comes down L. then cross to R., and finally goes to c. hole and looks in. SAM moves to L.) Well! SAM. (To LEM) Think it's a well. (Crosses to R. c.) BRENT. (To LEM) I was told that I could get board here. (SAM signals to LEM not to answer, then drops down R. BRENT moves down to i~ of SAM) You take boarders, don't you? SAM. Well, Luelly Bush takes boarders some, but I reckon her house is full. BRENT. Full ? ( Grip with B on it BRENT) SAM. (Goes upstage R. and speaks to LEM who is on the porch) Go on in, Lem, and see if Luelly will take him. (Pantomimes to LEM to keep his mouth shut, then comes down to L. of BRENT,. LEM exits into the house) Now look here young feller. Let's get down to business. BRENT. Business? . SAM. (Jumps in front of BRENT to R. of Mm) You're from Bostin, ain't you? BRENT. No, I'm from New York. SAM. Oh, I see! New York, eh? Well' youVe a follerin' three fellers and a gal, ain't you? BRENT. How did you know that? Well, I dpn!t mind admitting that I am. SAM. I knew it. BRENT. See here, if I can't get board here i can make it worth your while to keep an eye on 52 CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. these people. SAM. Who, me? I'm on the ground first. Mis- ter, and I'm working for myself. BRENT. Working for yourself? They haven't told you say, what do you know about it ? SAM. Nobody has to tell me nothin'. I got rea- sons, I hev, an' I know who you are, too. I grit las' picture. Shaved off your moustache, ain't you? Sunday's papers every livin' week, and I seen your You can't fool me! And I seen the B on your valise, too. I wasn't born yistiddy. BRENT. Say, who do you think I am ? SAM. I know who you be! Your Detective Burns. BRENT. Burns ! Ha, ha, ha ! SAM. Yes, an' I know why you're here, too. Guess you was born yistiddy. Yer ain't heard nothin' about the bank burglary, hev you? BRENT. No, what burglary? LUELLA. (Enters from house, followed by LEM, -who stays on porch. LUELLA comes downstairs L.) Oh, how do you do. (Sees SAM) My land. Sam, you out here again! SAM. Yes, Luelly I (Puts his finger's to his lips warning ly) BRENT. (To LUELLA) Is that Mrs. Bush? LUELLA. Yes, Mrs. Bush. BRENT. I was told at the Grand Hotel that you took boarders. LUELLA. Usually; but I guess my house is full just now. BRENT. (Lays grip R. of him)' Well, couldn't you accommodate me for a little while? (Turns and see SAM pantomiming to LUELLA) Say, you keep put of .this. (Picks up his bag and crosses to LUELLA)" I want to get a room here. (LEM comes' down from porch and goes upstage L.) ' ss LUELLA. (Crossing to SAM, R.) I'd like to know what you got to say about it, Sam Dicken. If Tan,- ney's Corners is goin' to be a fashionable resort, I ain't got nothin' against it. (To BRENT) I only got a little attic room left. BRENT. I'll look at it, if I may t r LuELLA. Certainly. Step right in. BRENT. What's the idea of all this excavating? LUELLA. That's my other boarders. They're Ipinda scientific in their tastes. They're gfeoloerizers. BRENT. Geologizers! (Laughs) That's good! Geologizers! (Laughs and exits into the house. LufcLLA follows him up to the steps) , LEM. (Comes down stage L. laughing) Well, I don't blame him for laughing. It's the darndest fool thing I ever heard of. LUELLA. (On porch) Lem, you let them hens out and feed 'em. ; LEM. But I ain't had my dinner yet. 1 LUELLA. Neither has the hens, an' they lay eggs to earn theirs. LEM. (Coming down L. c.) Sufferin' Moses! Expectin' me to lay eggs with all my other work ! . SAM. (Crosses to R. of LEM) Look here. Lem, we're up against it . That feller is a detective, a New York detective. I got to git back to town for a body warrant and some fellers to help HMJ. Now, you got to be my depety in case they try to get away while I'm gone. Here, I'll leave you hare the loan of my badge. (Takes off his badge and fins it on LEM'S vest) I got to swear you in. Hold up your right hand. (LEM holds up his hand) Take off your hat. (LEM takes off his hat) You solemnly swear to protect the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, so help you God? . , LEM. I do. ,' SAM. So be it. Now, that detective feller ain't & CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. gtlt no more proof than me. He's come here to watch 'em that you g6tter do, Lem, is to watch Kim, an* if he dasts lay a hand on any one of 'en\ yoia put in a prior claim, see? LEM. I see. If he tries to take 'em, I'll take 'em first. SAM. You're some deputy! Now. for God's sake, don't lose the badge. And remember, if you jest sit tight and wait till I git back you git one fourth of the reward. (Exits thru gate and off L. LEM sneaks off R. u.) (JiM and MARY sneak on from R. Carrying pick and spade.) JIM. It's all right, Mary, they've gone. We can get back to work. Let's dig. Remember what she Said about old Mr. Carleton digging around here in the night with a lantern ? I'll bet you this is the spot. Let's get busy. (Comes to c. MARY /o R. c.) Where's Mac and Carleton? (MARY points off R.) Oh ! You were right about that Constable watching us. (No reply from MARY) I say you were right about the Constable he is watching us. Say, Mary, a 1 re you going to keep this up all the time? (MARY nods) Aren't you ever going to speak to me again ? (MARY shakes her head) Not even if I apologize? (MARY shakes her head) Listen! I'm sorry I kissed you that day in the shop. I'll take it right back now. (MARY throws a shovelful of earth in the air and gets some of it in her eyes) What's the matter, got something in your eye? Serves you right for not speaking to me. (MARY gives him a 'tiny handkerchief. He looks at it, laughs, gives f !' back to her, takes out a large bandanna handker- chief from his own pocket and starts to remove the fat from her eye. MARY turns her face up as if 'waiting to be kissed. JIM is so confused at her CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. 3fr nearness, that he covers her mouth with a corner of his handkerchief, she proceeds to get the speck o*t of her eye} Now listen, Mary, you've got to talk to me some dav. Some day I'll say, "Will you marry me ?" and you'll have to say "I will" (MARY stamps her foot) Well, you will. And, by the way, when we're married you're not the one who's going to wear those. (Points to her knickers) That's MY job. Oh, I didn't mean that. Aren't you ever going to speak to me again? Well, will you learn this stuff if I teach it to you ? (Deaf and dumb al- phabet) Just think of it, Mary! Here we are- rich at last ten millions under our feet and how are we going to enjoy it unless we speak to each other? You know, Mary, there's lots of things I want to say to you, but I can't because I'm afraid of getting serious. You know what I mean ? When I think of having my novel taken and making money or ever getting ahead, it's only for one rea- son. (Business. He tries to kiss her. She shakes her head and points off L. and tries to make him look. He finally understands. Looks off L. and see's GREYSON) Oh, the surveyors! I'll bet they've got our chart. Let's watch them. Go in that house. Sh! (They both tiptoe into house up R.) GREYSON. (Enters c. from L. looks at hole c., then goes to gate and calls) Come on, boys-! (Comes downstage followed by 2 surveyors. One stays up L. the other comes down L.) Look here, they're digging up the whole place. What the devil are they after? Well, what do you know about that, eh ? Now get through here as quickly as you can. I don't want them to see us if we can help jt. Remember, muni's the word. BROWN. They certainly have been tearing things up around here. Look at the size of that hole. (Looks into hole down L.) GREYSON. Well, if you see anybody don't ..ask 56 CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. any questions and don't answer any. Remember, we've got to pull this thing off quietly. (MARY and JiM enter from house R. u. They stand and motion to CARLETON and MAC off R. LEM enters from down R. CARLETON and MAC enter from R. and noork over to their former digging place's) BROWN. What'll we say if these people want to know what we're surveying for? GREYSON. You leave that to_me. That's the reason I came along; I can jolly them. JIM. (Is now down R. c. with MARY) Hello! GREYSON. (Turns) Hello! JIM. What are you fellows surveying for ? GREYSON. (L. c.) Oh, just exercise. JIM. I suppose you think you're the comic col- umn of this town, don't you? LEM. ( Down R.) Hello, Mr. Greyson! GREYSON. Hello, Bush. MARY. (Over to LEM) Mr. Bush, you've got to tell these men to get off this place. LEM. Mr, Greyson, what are you doin' here? MAC. (Has crossed to GREEN, who is upstage near L. hole) Pardon me, my man, but I'm work- in' here. This is my hole. (CARLETON comts down L. to BROWN, who turns and stares at him. Then txits R. with tripod t followed by GREEN. BROWH re-enters and stands over R.) JIM. (To LEM) You've got to put these fel- lows off. We've paid for the privilege of digging here. LEM. This is Mr. Greyson. He's a mighty im- portant man round here. JIM. I don't care who he is, he's got to get off, if they won't go peacefully we'll throw them off. (BRENT enters and stands on porch.) MARY. Yes, and I'll help. CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. S7 CARLETON. Dear me, a scuffle! No, Anderson! MAC. (Comes downstage c.) Now, now, Jim, one moment! (To GREYSON) Would you mind telling us, Mr. Greyson, what you're surveying for ? GREYSON. Well, my friend, you don't own the place, do you? MAC. No, but we've sort o' rented it for a time. GREYSON. Hm! Is that right, Bush? : LEM. Yep, they rented it. JIM. And we've got a right to know what you're doing here. MARY. Indeed we have! GREYSON. What are you people digging the whole place up for? JIM. That's our affair. MARY. Yes, that's our affair. GREYSON. Everyone is entitled to his own little secret, eh ? Well, what we're doing is our affair. BRENT. (On porch) And what you're all do- ing I'm going to make my affair. JIM. YOU! MARY. That man again! GREYSON. Who the devil are you? MAC. It's the man who bought the books. CARLETON. (Moves toward porch) What hare you done with Miss Fenton? JIM. You can't stay on this place. BRENT. I don't see how you'll prevent me, Cap- tain Kidd. I've just secured a room here. MARY. Mrs. Bush rented all her rooms to us. GREYSON. Say, what have you got here, a lot of lunatics ? J*M. You'll soon find out whether we're a bunch of lunatics or not. I'm on to you and your pre- tbded surveying. You've found our chart. 58, CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. MARY. That's what I think. . ,. . . \ (MAC goes up c. ) BRENT. Well, you stole the chart from me in the first place. JIM. You're another! I bought it. GREYSON. What the devil are you talking about } JIM. You'll find out what we're talking about (Looks in GREYSON'S pocket for the chart) and if you keep lost property you're no better than a thief. MARY. Yes, that's right, you're a thief MAC. Children, childern, you'll be sent up for libel. GREYSON. (To JIM) See here, nobody can call me a thief and get away with it JIM. All right, come, come on; I'm iust aching to lick some one. (Goes for GREYSON. MAC and CARLETON drag him over L.) MARY. Yes, and he can do it, too. (Pummels GREYSON and shoves him over R. BROWN grabs GREYSON and pulls him away from MARY. Ad lib quarrel until MARIAN enters') MARIAN. (Rushes on thru gate and comes down G. from L.) Wait! Wait! (Points to BRENT) Has that man bought this place ? Has he bought it ? CARLETON. (Goes to L. of MARIAN) Miss- Fen- ton! MARIAN. (Over to BRENT) You thought you'd given me the slip, didn't you? (Turns to CARLE- TON) William, this man is going to buy this place and put you off. He told me so. :: , BRENT. (Down L.) So you've been working for him and pretending to be my friend. ; MARIAN. William, you remember the man, who came to inquire about the books that day Well, CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. <& that is the man. I saw at once what he was after. MARY, (c.) Oh, so that's why you carafe to the shop for the books? MARIAN. Yes. (To CARLETON) I couldn't wait for you, William, and I've followed him ever since. I've had an awful time. BRENT. No worse than I have. She stuck like a burr. CARLETON. (To MARIAN) You went off on a journey with a stranger! MARIAN. But, William, you don't understand. ('Both go upstage c.) MARY. (To BRENT) I'm going to see Mrs. Bush. She's got to put you off this place. Grand- daddy, don't you let anybody touch anything till I get back. I'll settle this. (Runs into house) GREYSON. (Crosses to R. of BRENT) Look here, it seems that we've butted into some sort of a family row. I don't mean to be curious, but I would like to know if the young lady is right when she says you intend buying this place. BRENT. I don't know that this is your affair. GRAYSON. Well, it is my affair, Boys. (Ad lib until SAM enters) SAM. (Enters from c. followed by two men, who stay up R. SAM comes running down R. c.) See here, what's going on here! JIM. (L. c. ) You're going on ! We've had enough of your spying around. BRENT. ( Crossing to c.) Look here, Anderson, I want you SAM. No, you don't want him, neither. I got first call. Here's my badge (Flips his coat open, finds the badge gone, then turns and throws LEM'S vest open) No, here it is. (Holds up a warrant) And here's my warrant. Mr. Anderson, I arrest you on suspicion of burglarizin' the Swampset Sav- 60 CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. ings Bank. ALL. WHAT! . : ; BRENT. Now, see here! SAM. (To BRENT) And I don't keer if you arc Burns, you ain't goin' to git no reward. Hands off ! (Blows a police whistle, the two men come down TL) He's my prisoner. Fellers, seize him. (The two men grab JIM) MAC. (Comes down L. c.) You canna arrest our Jim. SAM. You keep out of this. JIM. Here, wait a minute, let's have some rea- son in that. What do you mean by calling that man Burns? SAM. I mean what I say. He's detective Burns and he's come to apprehend you as a thief, but I got ahead of him. CARLETON. (L. c.) He's no more Burns than I am. SAM. Be keerful what you say, young fellow, it'll be took down and manufactured as evidence against you. (Crosses to CARLETON and pulls out the wallet) Ever see this before? CARLETON. Why, that's my wallet? Where did you SAM. You got brass to own it well, you kin came along, too. (Grabs CARLETON) Poisonin' and murder's jest as much in my line as a bank robbery. CARLETON. Poison! Murder! What do you mean? SAM. Never mind what I mean, you come along CARLETON. Where ? SAM. To jail, that's where. CARLETON. Who, me? I! In a dirty filthy jail SAM. (Grabs CARLETON by the collar) My but you're getting fussy, ain't you Well yu kin come along with this feller. CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. & MAC. If ye take our Jim you've got to take me, too. SAM. I don't believ you're in it, you're too old MAC. Whatever he's in, I'm in. SAM. What, murders and all ? ALL. Murders ! SAM. Yes, murders. I got it all down here in black and white. (Takes out chart and reads) "Where T. is buried. Where two sailors was kill- ed defendin' T." CARLETON. Why, that's our chart! JIM and MARY. 'Sh! SAM. Chart? CARLETON. Yes ; showing where the buried trea- sure lies. ALL. Buried treasure! ,. JIM. Shut up, Carleton! CARLETON. (Crossing to c.) If you think I'm going to be quiet and go to any dirty, filthy jail, you're much mistaken. There's ten millions of dol- lars here on Tanneys Corners and that chart tells you where to dig for it. (All spring for the chart, which SAM holds, and in the struggle each one gets a piece of the paper) ALL. (Reading from their pieces) "Apple or- chard three paces to right count ten steps-r- where T. is buried turn to right !" JIM. Here, here, you people, that's our chart. (All scramble around for picks, talking ad lib) SAM. Here stop it, stop it! Am I constable or am I not? (The hub bub ceases) Are you all gone crazy ! I'll arrest the whole lot of vou in a minute ! Stop it, I say! (Pauses, with his hand to his fore- head) Wait a minute, I got to think. There used to be talk of pirates landin' on this coast. LEM. Sure they did. I'm a goin' to dig. ALL. So am I. (All scramble around stage CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. f or P^ces to dig) SAM. Stop it, stop it! Look here, I'm going to give you people a chance to prove you're treasure seekers, and if we find anything we share equal. JIM. (L. c.) Share nothing ! Not on your life ! CARLETON. (L.) I'll agree. I'm not going to lail ; GREYSON. I think you're all crazy, but if there's anything to this, I'm in it. SAM. Have you got a piece of the chart? GREYSON. Sure thing ! SAM. Then you're in it. There's ten millions here. JIM. Yes, ten millions. I'll tell you what I'll do. I'll agree to Jthare, in. A- ding you let me piece the chart togethc- and do the dividing. SAM. All right, we kin watch you. Surrender up your pieces, fellers. {All bring their pieces to SAM) Now, Lern, get something to lay 'em on. LEM. I got : ! Old Mr Henry's nin barrell, that'll do. (All rush up R. BROWN rum to barrel, and rolls it up c. back of grindstone) JIM. (As he rushes upstage he falls into half up R.) Hey, what's this hole! Gee, there's some- thing hard in there ! I feel it ! Wait, I swear there's something there. (The men take picks and start digging) SAM. We share even. JIM. (As the men dig) That's the stuff, dig! There's something there. A rope! Get hold of it! Come on, everybody! (Two men get hold of rope and pull) Now lift! Again! It's coming! We've got it. (The box is drawn up and brought downstage. All fall on the box, talking excitedly) For heaven's sake, get up ! Nobody's going to be left out ! There's ten millions in there and there'-: CAPTAIN KIDD, JH. $3 enough for everybody ! Everyone will get his share. i L.SM,. (Sprawling ov*f tke box) Is the treasure all in money? JIM. No, jeweled cups and flagons I Barrels and Chests of gold,! There, must be other boxes, dozens of them 1 (All jump} Wait, let's open this one firsj MARY. (Appears on porch, leveling *, 9* ot people on stage) Now then, everybody but Mac Tavish and Company clear off! I've just bought this place. (LvELLA follows MARY on and stands 4 Of her) ALL. WHAT! MARY. Everybody but MacTavish and Company clear off ! LUELLA. Yes, here's the agreement. JIM.. It's too late, Mary, we've agreed to share and share alike. MARY. Share what ? JIM. The treasure. Look, we've found it/We've found the treasure. (MARY throws the rifle on the ground and jumps down to L. of him. LUELLA comes downstage L. GRAYSON grabs a pick. /IM gets it. from him, after a tussle) Wait a minute ! Stand back ! We're all here, nobody's going to be left out I'm going to open this box and I'm going to take out what's in it, so stand back ! (BREAKS the lock on the box. Two men pry the cover loose and it folk backward toward the audience) Au.. Oh! JIM. Stand back ! (Takes a letter from the bvx) It's a letter ! LEM. I'll bet it's a check for ten millions Q dol- large. LUELLA. (To MARY) An4 I sold you the farm for two thousand dollars ! JIM. (Reading inscription on envelope) 64 CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. Mr. William Carleton." Why, Carleton, it's for you.' ' ' : ;/;:: >*':>'" 'CARLETON. (Crosses And takes the envelope) It's my grandfather's handwriting. JIM: Open it and read it GARLETON. (Opens letter and reads) f< Deaf William: The Carleton family has been a great family from the time its progenitors landed arid settled here on Cape Cod LEM. MY, was you Cape Codders ? ALL. Go on and read it. ^CARLETON. "On Cape Cod to the present time, when you, as the last of the family, should inherit the estate now concentrated in New York, and also the treasure which you will find buried here." : ALL. Yes, yes, go on ! : CARLETON. "Now, you, my dear grandson, have been a dreadful disappointment to me, but I hope to renew in you some strain of the Carleton blood. If you have followed the instructions I am sure you have dug this farm from end to end." ALL. Yes, yes ! CARLETON. " I trust that you will now be better fitted to enjoy the treasure which you have found here good health, fresh air, honest work which is all the treasure that lies buried in these neglected fields." (All stand dumbfounded) MARY. (Takes the letter and reads) "Good health, fresh air, honest work, which is all the trea- sure that lies buried in these neglected fields." JIM. Oh, Mac, it's all my fault! I've made you lose everything! MAC. Dinna lose your courage, children. Re- member your verses* (Recites) "The inner side of every cloud Is bright and shining." JIM and MARY. (With their hands .pressed Mjainst MAC, his arms about their shoulders) ...: CAPf Alfa lfc, JR. "I therefore turn the clouds about And always wear them inside out ' To show die lining." : : Curtain, , .... . ... i ..., v ... ACT III. IJEGHTS: Down up at rise. SCENE: The old bookstore; a week later. Music at rise The shop is closed and dark. The tables of books are covered with dust sheets. A hurdy gurdy is playing "Home, Sweet Home" oft , stage as the curtain rises. , A moment after the Curtain rises one heafs a key in the front door. The door opens t let- ting in a brilliant flood of light, and disclosing MAC, MARY and JIM, travel-worn and di- spirited, and loaded down with luggage. They come in silently. One feels the contrast be- tween their "down-and-out" feelings and 'the gay music outside. (Enter JIM, MARY and MAC.) MAC goes wearily to R. of L. desk and drops into a chair. JIM leaves his suitcase by c. door. MARY picks up MAC'S suitcase and exits into room L. She re-enters a few moments later without her coat and hat. JIM. (Runs up the shades and is looking at- a of milk bottles on the coping outside the win- $6 CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. dow) You forgot to stop the milk. There's a whole row on the coping. (Goes outside and brings m two bottles. To MARY who inters from room L.) You forgot to stop the milk. (MARY takes the bottles from JIM, puts them on L. desk and begins to pull the coverings from table up L. JIM stands uncomfortably for a moment, then picks up his suitcase and starts for door c.) Well, I guess I'd better be getting along. MARY. I'll have some coffee ready in a moment, Granddaddy. MAC. She means for you to stay, lad. JIM. (Goes c. to MARY and helps her fold one y/ the sheets) I know, Mac, it's all my fault. MAC. No, no, lad! (MARY comes down to MAC. Takes off his hat and helps him on with his house jacket.') JIM. (Still holding the sheet awkwardly in his hands) If I'd listened to Mary I'd never have bought the books in the first place. . (MARY picks up the two bottles of milk and exits yf auctions, lad. JIM. That's right, Mac, always blame yourself. I suppose there's no use cryin' about it, but Gee! It makes me feel rotten, Mac ! (MARY enters from L. with tobacco jar and pipe. She puts the jar on the desk and hands MAC the pipe) MAC. What, smoke in the shop, Mary! I thought ye didna like it. MARY. There'll be no one in the shop so early, Granddaddy. (Then crosses and takes the cover from JIM and exits L.) MAC. See if there's anything in the mail box. CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. 6; Jim. JiW. (Goes outside, takes a letter and postal card from the mail box, re-enters and brings them down to MAC) A letter and a postal card. (Crosses to R. as MARY enters from L. As MAC sits staring, I'll be back in.a : jiffy. Oh, Mary \~~(Ma fans hereto door c. .feeling around in his pockets-, in a low tone to MARY, as she goes to him) Mary, got -a nickel? (Down fo MAC) .Now, Mac* don't you be down in the mouth., " Everything will turn out all right. I'll stop at my place arid get my rnaii jMfaybe I've sold my novel or somebody may have left me .a million. You never can tell what'^ going $o happen. (Goes up to c. door) -MAC. A million! ... JIM. Remember, Mac, every silver lining has a~r (Stalls, shakes his head sadly and exits c. toward *) ,. MAC. (Rises and goes up to door) He's a gocxj lad. (Closes the door and comes down L. c.) V.MARY, Yes, he is; and you're good, too. (Cpmts down to R. of him} You never reproached me for buying that old farm. MAC. She wouldn't take it back? v MARY< No. You are fond of me, aren't you. l^ran^daddy? - H MAC. Fond? Ah, that's no' the word, lass.: ,.< 'MARY. I'm ; af raid I've always been a little .too self-willed. : !:-.uii ! ; . [vaw MAC. It was your money, lass. Ye"had a v rig^it ,t<> spen4 it, (Puts his, arm about her lovingly) Afl' if ye've found any little faults, in your charactejr joaaybe ye haven't missed the treasure alter all. . . MARY. You know, Granddaddy. I ; .wouldn't haye sluolc, it ; : out^-about no.t speaking to Jim-j^bui I just couldn't give in. I'm not really stubborn, b^t I like to rhave my own way.. , , , ; . .; MAC. . : jThat. makes most of: the trouble Jin /the world, lass, folks wantin' their own way. . ,. ..; -MARY. .... , (4fter a fause, she, throws ker rr afms about his neck, trying to cheer him up. He.')iiss.es_ CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. 69 heron both cheeks') Don't you mind, Granddaddy. everything will turn oiit.aU right. Why don't you ciqad your other . letter, Granddaddy ? (Turns* R. takes cloth from chest t puts it up R. and then conies down to R. of MAC.) .,-;. , v MAC. Oh, yes ! Perhaps it's something that will cheer -up us. (Opens the letter and reads it silently) : ; MARY. What is it? (MAC hands her the letter); From Larrabee> (Reads) "MacTavish and .Com- pany, Dear Sirs: This is to notify you that .as 1 have an applicant for the; shop, I must know by return mail if you wish to renew the lease; at the increased, rent. I took the liberty of showing ^he shop while you were away." (Pause) Granddaddy* that man had no right to come here. He gave us a month in which to decide. ;u MAC. Well, lass, you know we told him ,we couldna pay the increased rent. I think he had ,the right to show the old place. (Moves upstage -iL.) MARY. Just think, Granddaddy, with the. money I wasted buying that worthless farm we could naye lived here forever. . r .'; JIM. (Enters, c. and .comes downstage 'R.\.C a package containing chops in one hand, and his notffll in the other; he closes .the. door and comes ciown c.) Chops. (Hands the. chops to. MARY) '. : MAC, (Comes down L. ,9.) What's the ter now, Jim? : . - - . .~ . JiM. The landlady's given my roam body else and all my stuff, is dumped out; in MAC. WeH, send your things here, lad. welcome -to your old room^ isn't, he, Mar^? .MARY. Remember, Oranddaddy, we've get out Qf here, ^(^ran^ JIM LARRABEE'S JIM. And here's my novel back asrauTi.. take the novel /row him,,and { .plac.es \-it ..P% CAPTAIJN &I>t>, Dont mind, Jim, some of the best nbvtfs in the World have been rejected time And time again. JIM. And that's not the worst! I've lofet my Jdfe MARY. Oh! MAC. What? JiSi. Here's a prize packet I drew out ttf the mail. (Hands a letter to MAC awrf fwrw.s R.) Can't even keep a job as a penny-a-liner, syndicate's sud- denly decided that my stuff is too highbrow for them. Highbrow! Hofbrau, I eall it. {Sinks dejectedly on chest R.) MAC. ( Over to R. ) Well, anyway, they appreci- ate that you do fine writin', lad. JIM. Oh, yes, letting me down easy! I wouldn't care, but even with that work, measly as it was, I cotild have helped you and Mary out, but now when you needing (Drops his head in his hands) MAC. {Consolingly) It's lucky you're at liberty. I Always said you should never have left us. Why, you're a grand salesman. You can talk anybody into anything. JIM. Yes, 1 talked you into that treasure hunt, didn't I? MARY. See here, Granddaddy. ($iar. ;j ; ^(CAaLjETpN^ (.Enters c. dosses the door and twnu t$ JIM ) Good rooming, James. vojli^f Hello! ; Where did you drop from? \*. ,v CARLE^ON. , ;I ; tpok the next train. ;!jiM.i ,I,kne\v you wouldn't stay up there alone CARLETON. Oh, indeed, positively I intend doing 150^ but; one slight difficulty has arisen. I had no -money^ so I, came down here to try to negotiate a loan. -, '>.;, .;;; . ,. ,a JiM.f And you came straight to us. That's a ' . . CARLETON. I didn't mean that. I'll explain^ if .you have a : mQnient (5"*^ on chest L. ) .,:' JIM. What are your symptoms? (Drops dow* .. GARI^ETON. Well, I have wired my grandfathers .lawyers that, iish^ill obey the spirit of the comniuni- . cation :ancl stay , up : there a year doing manual labor. i. JiH; And: then, you took the next train back! A&its .;*, of \ L. : desk) .-/.. :GARLETON. Qnly f or the day, I have come to try to 'persuade -those; lawyers to give me an advance on the mpney I shall inherit next year. !; .!jiM-Here? iWhy?- -"i ..... . , ..,-, '-,.-:.,. CARLEXOW, v-Well, it has troubled me excessively :that:it was; thriough /me : Miss Mary spent all .tier money for that farm, and if I'm to live up ther^ if or a year I think I should pay her r 5ome slight rent. , :j JIM,! {Jumps, up and goes R.) Fine ! . ^ great! Do you think you could do that? p w help a lot ifiypuiwpuld,! . (Starts for CAPTAIN CARIJETQN. ,. ; One moment!; There is another matter on wtiich .1, would like to consult; you, pfif vately. ^., . :/Jl . -, ; , , _ . t ... , ...;; ,.. .., JIM, All right , v ". ., ; 1 ;. : ; ; CARLETON. Did Miss Fenton say anything abom me o>m,ing bac;k PA the train? j ". . . j JIM. No, we didn't talk much. . o CARLETON. No. I suppose not, being depressed. You see, Anderson, if I've got to stay up therfe a year I think don't you think that a farmer should be a sort of a married person? , , : : ; JIM. A f arraer on Cape Cod ? He's entitled to a harem. . . x ;.,; ' ^ I couldn't .help it, the scjieme ran away with itself. I was stumped whe^ I lountf 'Mr. Carleton had sold the books, so J hurried here 1 ip'&& them back to him. I didn't dream the ' V^hbfe ^lot of you would make such a quick getaway to Cape &&. MARY. ( Over to MAC) Well, what do yoti tttirik of -'that, Granddaddy! , . : . ' _;' ; MAC. I don't know, I'm sure. MARY. (To BRENT) And you mean to say yoii never intended buying that farm? BRENT. Why, no. I only told that to' Mis ; s Fen- ton so she'd tell Carleton. : , MARY. (Crosses to CARLETON) Why, Mr. ; iCaifl!^ tbrii ; ; -f- , CARLETON. Miss Mary, pardon trie. (Cro-sses'ib BRENT) Look here, sir, look here! Don't you see what you've done? They've spent all their money. They've bought that farm. BRENT. Well, that's very unfortunate, but I told you the scheme ran away with itself. CARLETON. Miss Mary, I shall never for^iv'je myself for being the unwitting author of your mis r fortune. SAM. (Enters and conies down c.) Well, J guess you didn't expect to see me, did jrou? BRENT. My friend, the Constable. . . .,' SAM. ( To BRENT) The fake detective ! ' JIM. How on earth did you find us? MARY. Where did you come from? SAM. Got into the big depot at 12:13 just an hour ago, and I just shot down in the under-ground. Never saw nothin' like it! Tried to ask the con- ductor for Des-des-brosses street, an' 'fore I covdjci get the word out Pst! we was there. MAC. And did you come all the way to see us ! ? SAM. Well, sorter kinda to see you and sx>ftet kinda on business. CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. MAC. Get the officer a chair, Mary, he took* prn out. (MARY starts to hand chair to SAM) CARLETON. Pardon me, Miss Mary. (Gets chair *f/> L. and places it up c. for SAM) SAM. (As he sits) Well, I am a little blowed. Always wanted to see the Flatiron Building. Walk- ed there before I took the underground. {Laughs) *Twas worth it! There was a high wind blowin'. ,{11 laugh. JIM sits R.) BRENT. I suppose you came in pursuit of those famous burglars? SAM. Wa'nt no burglars. President of the bank skipped to Canady yistiddy with all the rest of the cash. 'Course I suspicioned him all along, but nobody 'd believe me. (MAC sits L.) JIM. (On chest R.) You didn't get him, then? SAM. I arrested him jist as he started in his uutymobile, so I thought it would be kinda slick tp take him to the lock-up in his own car. He knew how to run it and I didn't. He got in first and asked me to crank it but it was a self starter. (All laugh) CARLETON. Were you hurt? SAM. Well, it didn't do me a durn bit of good, MARY. Oh, Mr. Sam ! And you thought we did it all the time. I was only playin' around with you folks. Oh, no, you were not! SAM'. That's one reason I come here to see you 1 know I give you folks an awful scare up there, so I thought I'd do you a favor to make up for it. t know, you don't want that old farm of Luelly's, so maybe I'll take it offen your hands. MARY. WHAT! CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. 79 JIM. (Rises, and crosses to SAM) Do you want to buy it ! (BRENT crosses to, R.) SAM, Yes, I got a pretty good proposition to make to you folks. Lemme see I'll gin you 111 $ia you (Thinks) Nope, that's too much. I'll gin you twenty-five hundred- One hundred dollars down and ten dollars a month, for twenty years, till it's paid for. ALL. Twenty years! SAM,. I don't mind tellin' you that I'm thinkin' of gettin' spliced and I got to have some place to keep her in. GREYSOIS,. (Enter's, c. stairs and comes down. R. c.) Well, good morning, folks. ALL. Good morning. GREYSON. How do you do, Mr. MacTavish (Raises his hat to MARY) Miss! (Sees SAM) You beat me to it, eh ? YPAJ got here before me. JJM. Is all of Swampset coming to New York? MAC. Well, well, it's Mr. Greyson the surveyor MARY. ( To GREYSON) What do you want here ? Do you wish to buy some books ? GREYSON. No, that's a little out of my line this mooring. I've come here on a different kind of business. $AM. I should say he has! GREYSON. (To SAM) Trying to put one QVCI on me, eh? SAM. I got a right. GREYSON. Nothing of the kind. SAM.. Hev too ; it's a free country. GREYSON. (R. c.) Now, look here, Dicken, if you, try to spoil anything for me here I'll make you pay for it. $AM> Take keer t Take keer I You're threaten- in' a officer of the law I GREYSON. Officer o,f the law! That foolish stuff ! (A4 W> quarrel ivith. SAM) 8o CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. ? \ JIM. What's the idea? GREYSON. That's all right, young fellow, don't get excited. (To MAC) I beg your pardon. I didn't meant to start a row in your place, but seeing this rube here rather upset me. SAM. Who's a rube? MARY. Why shouldn't Mr. Sam be here? He came on business. GREYSON. Just as I thought. I suppose he's made you an offer for the Bush Farm ? MARY. Yes, he has. CARLETON. (Comes down L. c.) But I want to rent it. GREYSON. What do you want it for? CARLETON. To live on. GREYSON. Well, I had a proposition to make re- garding that property which I unfortunately men- tioned to our friend here, old Sleuth, and I suppose he thought he'd get here first and sting me. SAM. Well, business is business. MAC. (Crossing to GREYSON) Do you want to buy the place? GREYSON. I might, if you don't put the price too high. MARY. Oh, do sit down, won't you? (They push SAM out of the way, over R. and seat GREY- SON) GREYSON. (Laughing at their eagerness) Thanks ! JIM. (R. of GREYSON) Have a cigar? (Feels in his pocket) I haven't any. Have a cigarette? (BRENT works across to above GREYSON.) GREYSON. Thanks, I don't smoke. (Ad lib bus- iness of trying to get his hat, and general fussing wer him) Well, I judge from this cordial recep- tion that you folks are not averse to selling that CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. 81 , farm. MARY. Oh, if we only could. JIM. What do you want the place for ? GREYSON. Is it necessary to state that? SAM. (Mysteriously) I ain't say in' nothin', but I know what he wants it for. GRAYSON. Dickens, you keep out of this. BRENT. I suppose you haven't any lingering hope that there might be treasure up there? GREYSON. (Laughs) Do I look like that kind of a fellow? Now, folks, I'll tell you what I'll do. I'll give you three thousand cash for that farm right now. MAC. Well, that's verra MARY. Granddaddy ! SAM. Don't you take it. GREYSON. (To SAM) Shut up! (To the others) Well, what do you say, folks ? JIM. Wei 1 , if property values are increasing up there like that, I think we should hold on to it. GREYSON. It isn't worth a continental to you, and I just happen to want it right now. MARY. Well, Mr. Greyson, we might consider (SAM signals to her; spreading out his five fingers, indicating five) five thousand dollars. GREYSON. All right, I'll go you. CARLETON. One moment. Miss Mary, I'll give you six thr usand. SAM. Happy New Year! CARLETON. And I'll pay you in a year's time. GREYSON. Seven thousand dollars cash. CARLETON. Eight thousand. GREYSON. (Angrily) Nine. CARLETON. Ten thousand. MAC. No, no, Mr. Carleton, we can't let you do it. MARY. Granddaddy, please ! 82 CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. JIM. (Jumps over GREYSON'S legs and rtww *' MAC) Mac, Carleton will be a millionaire in a year and he won't lose anything by it. Can't you see it's valuable? SAM. It's valuabler than you think. (BRENT starts R.) GREYSON. (Rises') Look here, folks, this yap is giving you people a wrong idea. I give you my word of honor that place, as it stands, is of no value at all. SAM. (Rises and crosses to R. of GREYSON) Yes, as it stands. And I ain't no yap. BRENT. Mr. Carleton, one moment. (Draws CARLETON. aside R. They talk in pantomime. MARY J|M and MAC are talking excitedly down L.) SAM. (To GREYSON, in an aside) Do I git a commission if I keep quiet? GREYSON. Go to the devil ! BRENT. (To CARLETON) You don't have to live on that particular farm in order to comply with the will, and I think you're foolish. GREYSON. Of course, he's foolish. Why, they're giving property away up there. People won't pay taxes on it. CARLETON. (Sits R.) Dear me! JIM. (Crosses to L. of GREYSON. Well, look here, that's not consistent. In one breath you bid up the place and in the next you say it's of no value. (MARY goes to R. of GREYSON) GREYSON. It is of value to me and I'll be frank with you and tell you why. JIM. (L. c.) That's a good idea. GREYSON. You know that factory five miles west of the Bush Place? JIM. The fish cannery? CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. fcj GBEYSON. Yes. I own that place and I intend building a narrow gauge road to run from then to the shore. SAI*. Now the fat's in the fire! MARY. (To GREYSON) Oh, and you have to go through our place? GREYSON. Not necessarily. There are three other possible ways, but thru your place it's a little more direct SAM. Hm! Saves seven miles all marsh. ALL. OH! CARLETON. (On chest R.) Well, my offer of ten thousand still holds good. GREYSON. You've got to wait a year for his off- er. I'll give you eleven thousand cash right now. CARLETON. Twelve thousand. GREYSON. (Crosses toward CARLETON) See here, young man, you're off your head. (MARY moves over L, ) I tell you this place is of no value at all. JIM. Yes, but think how the railroad will im- prove things. GREYSON. It's a private road to be used for freight only. Now, look here. (To MAC) Are you the head of MacTavish and Company? MAC. I'm supposed to be. GREYSON. Supposed to be! MAG. I'm MacTavish. (Points to MARY) This ts the Company. GREYSON. Well, who will I do business with? MARY. You may transact your business with me. JIM. That's right, Mary, go ahead and talk to him. . GREYSOTT You keep out of this, young fellow. MARY. Now, look here, Mr. Greyson, I don't want to seem grasping. I don't care about the , it's the principle of the thing. Now, if 84 CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. you save seven miles of swamp, that property should be worth at least (Sees BRENT signalling her, showing the figure on a calendar hanging on * wall) Eighteen thousand dollars to you. MAC. But, Mary !(SAM laughs') GREYSON. (Turns to SAM) Now see what you've done! (JiM crosses to MAC) SAM. Well, what did you call me a yap for? GREYSON. (To MARY) The price is perfectly ridiculous. Do you mean to say that's the lowest figure you'll take? (JiM jumps up on L. desk and signals -frantically to MARY to accept) MARY. Well yes. (Business) Sit down there, Mr. Greyson. GREYSON. Well, I'll go you. (Takes out check book) Eighteen thousand for a stretch of marsh and stone ! (Sits R. of desk and starts to make out a check) CARLETON. (As BRENT nudges him) Nineteen thousand. GREYSON. What! (Rises and crosses to CAKLB- TON) Young man, let me tell you something. Ill guarantee to buy you a hundred acres up there for less than half that price if you keep out of this deal CARLETON. You don't say so! GREYSON. (Goes L.) Now, see here, folks, there's no use in pretending to you that I'm not anxious to have that place, because I am, but there's a limit to all things and you've reached it I'm going to make you one more offer. It's posi- tively my last word and I'm not bluffing. Ill give you twenty (Turns and looks at CARLETON, then back to others) twenty-five thousand dollars in cash for that farm, and not a penny more. (BRENT signals to CARLETON not to bid any higher) JIM. Carleton? (CARLETON shakes his head Jni signals to MARY to accept the offer ) CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. 85 MARY. Well we'll take it. GREYSON. Done! I have an agreement of sale all drawn up ready for you to sign. (BRENT crosses to above L. desk) And I'll give you my check right now. (Sits R. of desk and makes out a check. MARY and MAC go to L. of desk; MARY sits and looks over the agreement GREYSON hands her) BRENT. (To MARY) May I have a look at that? MARY. (As she hands him the agreement) Certainly, Mr. Brent. (BRENT takes it and exam- ines it) SAM. (To MARY) How about me? Don't I get a commission for puttin' you wise? MARY. You certainly deserve it, MR. SAM. BRENT. (Hands the agreement to MARY) That's all right. MacTavish and Company will have to sign it. MARY. Where do we sign, Mr. Brent ? BRENT. Right here; lower line. (MARY and MAC sign the paper.) SAM. (c.) Ten per cent of twenty-five thousand is (Tries to compute the amount on his fingers) Well, whatever it is, it'll be welcome. GREYSON. (Hands the check to MARY) There's your check. MARY. And here's your agreement. (Hands it to him) GREYSON. (Rises) Well, you people have stung me, all right. You can mail me the deed, Mr. Brent. (Goes upstage c.) I've got to catch the 2 :io train back. Good-bye, folks. ALL. Good-bye. MARY. I hope you are perfectly satisfied with your bargain, 'Mr. Greyson, 86 CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. GREYSON. Perfectly satisfied. IVe paid a good price, but I don't mind telling you that it's worth twice that much to me. Good-bye. {Exits up the ALL, Good-bye! (General hub-bub) MARY. Oh, Granddaddy, think of it! Twenty- five thousand dollars ! Isn't it wonderful ! (Throws her toriH about MAC, starts to embrace JIM, catches herself, runs for CARLETON and bumps into SAM) SAM. Hey, just a minute ! How about my com- mission? MAC. Yes, Mary, I think the officer is entitled to a -commission. MARY. Certainly, Granddaddy. We'll send it to you, Mr. Sam. SAM. I hope there'll be no delay. Not such a bad day's business. Well, I got to get the 2:10 too, or pay for a night's lodging. (Goes up c.) Anyway, I seen NCAV York. So long, folks. (Exit c. All laugh) BRENT. (Crosses to CARLETON) Come on, Carleton, the firm wants to congratulate you. CARLETON. Well I'm expecting a lady. BRENT. Miss Fenton? CARLETON. Yes. BRENT. If she's coming I'm going to make a getaway. Goodbye, MacTavish (Turns to MARY) Atid Company. I haven't forgotten that you trimmed me out of seventy dollars. (To JIM, as he goes up c.) Good-bye, boy. (Standing in door- way) Are we friends? MARY. Of course we are. BRENT. Good-bye, everybody. God bless yoti ! (Exits c.) MARY. (Runs to CARLETON) It's too bad, Mr. ALL. Good-bye ! TTM. Twenty-five thousand dollars ! CAPTAIN KTDD, JR. * Carteton, if you wanted the place. CAJLLETON. Oh, I didn't want it. I'm going to buy the adjoining property. ALL WHATf CASLETON. Yes, I saw that he had to have the place, so I thought I'd boost the price. MARY. Oh, you angel! (Throws her arm about kts neck and kisses him) MARIAN. (Enters c) Well! CAJULETON. (Rises, quickly and goes up to MAR LAN) Oh, Marian, she wasn't I I didn't kiss hefi MARIAN. Don't agitate yourself, William. I know only too well you'd never have the courage to kisfe a girl. CASLETON. Oh, wouldn't I! There! (jilt stamps his foot. As MARIAN turns, CA^LETON kisses her) MARIAN. Oh, William! GARLETON. How long will it take you to pack your bag? MARIAN. Why? CARLETON. (Looks at his watch) Because in thirty-five minutes you will be My wife. MARIAN. But, William ! CARLETON. William, hell ! Call me Bill! Come on! (Grabs her arm and drags her Up the stairs and off R. All laugh as they exit. JIM picks up his suitcase and stands as if ready id go) MASY. (Comes down to L. desk, waving the rhetk IB the air) Twenty-five thousand dollars! We can stay here ! We can advertise ! If we three fan't make this place go with capital ! JIM. Wait a minute! I know what you're go- ing to say. I'm just as happy as you people over this, btit I haven't any capital and I'm not going to ttOt here and live on you And Mac. 38 CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. MARY. (Comes to R. of desk) Nonsense! Mac Tavish and Company couldn't get on without y$tt. JIM. Are you talking to me? MARY. I am. ( Warning. ) JIM. (Drops his bag and goes to her) Do you mind saying it again? MARY. MacTavish and Company couldn't get on without you. JIM. Mary, you're only sorry for me. I couldn't come here and be a drone to you and Mac. MAC. You're no drone, lad. (Comes downstage and starts L.) Talk to him, Mary. Go on talking to him. (Exits L. on tiptoe) MARY. Now, look here, Jim JIM. Now, look here, Mary, there's nothing to talk over. I don't want to sell books. I want to write them. And I will, too, I'm going to write and I'm going to succeed if I starve doing it. M MARY. Of course you'll succeed. > JIM. I'm going away and I'll not come back' till I make good. And the very first thing I have ac cepted I'll come to you and I'll tell you then what I can't tell you now. MARY. But, Jim \\(Turns lightly from him) JIM; And I'll make you listen to me then. You know, Mary, all this has given me a great idea for a novel. (Goes to desk and gets manuscript of novel) This is no good anyhow ; I'm going to btirn it. MARY. (Takes the manuscript from him) Jim, you shan't do it. Granddaddy and I have gone Over every word of it and it's' beautiful. ' : JIM. Yes, beautiful (Takes letter from him) but it always comes back with these "Regretful!* CAPTAIN KIDD, JR. 89 declined.'' I'm so used to these things that I (Sees the check} Mary! Do you s e what I see! MARY. (Takes the check while JIM reads the letter) It's a check ! JIM. They've taken it! MARY. Oh, how splendid! But, Jim, why did they send it back? JIM. (Looking over the letter) "Slight change in the last chapter great promise new style (Draws himself up and speaks in a commanding tone) Come here ! MARY. (Surprised at his tone) What? JIM. Come here! (MARY goes to him) Come here! (Sl:e moves closer to him) Kiss me! (She turns slighily from him) Kiss me! I'm waiting? MARY. Oh, Jim ! (She puts her arms about his neck. Kiss, embrace, Curtain. END OF THE PLAY. KICK IN Plaj in 4 acts. By Willard Mack. 7 males, 5 females. * interiors. Modern costumes. Plays 2% hours. "Kick In" is the latest of tfco very few available mystery plays. Like "Within the Law," "Seven Keys to Baldpate," '"ttie Thirteenth Chair," and "In the Next Room," it is one of those thrillers which are accurately described as "not having dull moment in it from beginning to end." It is a play with il the ingredients of popularity, not at all difficult to set or to aet; the plot carries it along, and the situations are built with that skill and knowledge of the theatre for which Willard Mack ;* known. An ideal mystery melodrama, for high schools and (Royalty, twenty-five dollars.) Price, 75 Cent*. TILLY OF BLOOMSBURY ("Happy-Go-Lucky.") A comedy in 3 acts. By lata Hay. 9 males, 7 females. 2 interior scenes. Modern iiresS. Plays a full evening. Into an aristocratic family comes Tilly, lovable and youthful, with ideas and manners which greatly upset the circle. Tilly it so frankly honest that she makes no secret of her tre- mendous affection for the young son of the family; *his brings her mto many difficulties. But her troubles have a joyous end in charmingly blended scenes of sentiment and humor. This comedy presents an opportunity for fine acting, handsome stage setting*, ad beautiful costuming. (Royalty, twenty-five dollars.) Price, 75 Cents. BILLY Farce-comedy in 3 acts. By George Cameron. 10 males, 5 females. (A few minor male parts can be doubled, mak- ing the east 7 males, 5 females.) 1 exterior. Costumes, modern. Plays 2% hours. The action of the play takes place on the 8. 8. "Florida," hound for Havana. The story has to do with the disappearance of *t of false teeth, which creates endless complications among paosengers and crew, and furnishes two and a quarter hours of the heartiest laughter. One of the funniest comedies produced in UM last dozen years on the American stage is "Billy" (some- times called "Billy's Tombstones"), in which the late Sidney Brew achieved a hit in New York and later toured the country times. (Royalty, twenty-five dollars.) Price, 75 Cent*. &UCUBI, FRENCH, 35 West 45tb Street, Wew York City Comedy in a Prologue, 3 acts, and Epilogue. By Artlw Hiehman. 5 males, 7 fcmaJcs. 2 interiors, 1 Tostumee, 1876. Plays a full evening. Arthur Richtnan has constructed his play around tko legcud. Tin.- playwright Las shown great wisdom in his choio'. of material, for he has cleverly crossed the Cinderella them's vfith n strain of Romeo and Juliet. Mr. Hichmaa places .his yopu.if loves-K in the picturesque Naw York of forty year a ago This titae Cii.ii.rl: is u BeuicsireKS ia the home of a social limber, wh< ir.riy have been the first of her kind, though w* doubt it. She is interested sentimentally ia the son of thi hoaae Her father, learning of her infatuation for the young man without learning ulso that it in imu^uary on the you.ng girl's part, starts oat to discover his intentions. Pa id * poor inventor. Tha mother of the youth, ambitious chiefly for her children, shad tier* at the thought of marriage fr her son with a sewing-gift. But the Prince ecntrive* ous comedy a newspaper reporter, Jack Wright. Wright ovea his cmplpyer money, and he a(fr<" < 5 to *nrn ia one of the most Konr-ution.'il scoops the pnper hi:s ever uuown. His idea is to comlnct a lottery, with himself as the prize. The lottery is an no-juitd. Thousands of old maids buy coupons. Meantime Weigh': falls in love with a charming girl. Naturally he fears that te Bi^jt Ue -won Ly somooue LIT AnJ. starts to get as many ticket-* a his limited uif-uns will per:ait. Finally the last day is an- Bounced. The wiuniug nuiuhtr li 133:., and i.^ held bj[ Lizzie, an old maid, in the household of the newspaper owner. Lizzie refuses to give up. It is discovonvl, however, that she h4 gtolea the ticket. With this clue, the reporter threatens her with j^nvo;. Of coarse the coupon is surrendev-ed and Wright gets thq girl of his i-hoice. Produced at the Bijou Theater, New York, success. (Royalty, twenty-ova dollars.) Pried, 7Jj SAMIT2L FKENCH, 25 West 45th Street, New York NOTHING BUT THE TRUTH Comedy in 3 acts. By James Montgomery. 5 males, f females. Modern costumes. 2 interiors. Plays 2% hours. IB it possible to tell the absolute truth even for twenty-four hours? It is at least Bob Bennett, the hero of "Nothing but the Truth," accomplished the feat. The bet he made with his partners, his friends, and his fiancee these are the incidents in William Collier's tremendous comedy hit. "Nothing: but the Troth" can be whole-heartedly recommended as one of the most uprightly, amusing and popular comedies of which this country *, boast. (Royalty, twenty-five dollars.) Price. 75 Cents. SEVENTEEN A comedy of youth, in 4 acts. By Booth Tarkington. 9 males, 6 females. 1 exterior, 2 interior scenes. Costumes, modern. Plays 2% hours. It is the tragedy of William Sylvanus Baxter that he has ceased to be sixteen and is not yet eighteen. Baby, child, boy, youth nd grown-up are definite phenomena. The world knows them and has learned to put up with them. Seventeen is not an age, it is disease. In its turbulent bosom the leavings of a boy are at war with the beginnings of a man. In his heart, William Sylvanus Baxter knows all the tortures' and delights of love ; he is capable of any of the heroisms of his keroic sex. But he is still sent on the most humiliating errands by his mother, and depends upon his father for the last nickel f spending money. Billy Bill fell in love with Lolo, the Baby-Talk Lady, a vapid if amiable little flirt. To woo her in a manner worthy of himself (and incidentally of her) he stole his father's evening clothes. When his wooings became a nuisance to the neighborhood, his mother stole the clothes back, and had them altered to fit the middle-aged form of her husband, thereby keeping William at home in the evening. But when it came to the Baby-Talk Lady's good-bye dance, not to be present was unendurable. How William Sylvanus again got the dress suit, and how as he was wearing it at the party the negro servant, Genesis, disclosed the fact that the proud garment was in reality his father's, are some of the elements in this charming comedy of youth. "Seventeen" is a story of youth, love and summer time. It is a work of exquisite human sympathy and delicious humor. Pro- duced by Stuart Walker at the Booth Theatre, New York, it en- joyed a run of four years in New York and on the road. Strongly vecommended for High School production. (Royalty, twenty-five dollars.) Price, 75 Cents. SAMUEL FRENCH, 25 West 45th Street, Hew York City DADDY LONG-LEGS A charming comedy in 4 acts. By Jean Webster. The *oBl east calls for 6 males, 7 females and 6 orphans, but fee play, by the easy doubling of some of the characters, may be played by 4 males, 4 females and 3 orphans. The orphans appear only in the first act and may be played by small girls of any age. Four easy interior scenes. Oostnmes modern. Plays 2% hours. ICany readers of current fiction will recall Jean Webster's "Daddy Long- Legs." Miss Webster dramatized her story and it was presented at the Gaiety Theatre in New York, under Henry Miller's direction, with Ruth Chatterton in the principal rdle. "Daddy Long-Legs" tells the story of Judy, a pretty little drudge in a bleak New England orphanage. One day, a visiting trustee becomes interested in Judy and decides to give her a hanee. She does not know the name of her benefactor, bat simply calls him Daddy Long-Legs, and writes him letters brim- ming over with fun and affection. From the Foundling's Home ithe goes to a fashionable college for girls and there develops the romance that constitutes much of the play's charm. The New Tork Times reviewer, on the morning after the Broadway pro- Auction, wrote the following: "If you will take your pencil and write down, one below the other, the words delightful, charming, sweet, beautiful and entertaining, and then draw a line and add them up, the answer will be 'Daddy Long-Legs.* To that result you might even add brilliant, pathetic and humorous, but the answer even then would be just what it was before the play which Miss Jean Webster has made from her book, 'Daddy Long- Legs,' and which was presented at the Gaiety last night. To attempt to describe the simplicity and beauty of 'Daddy Long- liegs* would be like attempting to describe the first breath of Spring after an exceedingly tiresome and hard Winter." "Daddy Ixrag-Legs" enjoyed a two-years' run in New Tork, and was then toured for over three years. It is now published in play form for th first time. (Royalty, twenty-five dollars.) Price, 75 Cent*. THE FAMOUS MRS. FAIR A comedy in 4 acts. By James Forbes. 3 males, 10 females. 2 interiors. Modern costumes. Plays a full evening. An absorbing play of modern American family life. "The famous Mrs. Fair" is concerned with a strenuous lady who returns from overseas to lecture, and consequently neglects her daughter, who is just saved in time from disaster. Acted with great success by Blanche Bated and Henry Miller. (Royalty, twenty-five dollars.) Price, 75 Cents. SAMUEL FRENCH, 25 West 45th Street, Hew Tork City UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA LIBRARY Los Angeles This book is DUE on the last date stamped below. :r:n JUL J UC SOUTHERN REGIONAL LIBRARY FAC By Leo Ditriehstein. 7 males, f fe- males, i hours. 1 interior. "Are Yo ; one of tliose delightful farces like "Charley's Aunt" that r ; A mother and a daugh of the New Yo; ' "had hus- bands who account for absences from the joint household on nt evenings, falsely pretending to be Masons. The men do not know each otlu-r'b duplicity, and ench tells his wife of : advanced to leadership in his lodge. The older \ II pleased with her husband's supposed distinction in the order : fin promise to put up the name of a rship. Further perplexity over the rond daughter's hand < i. ... To tell the story of the play ro volumes, its complications are so numerous. It is One card wrongly placed and the whole thing But it stands, an example of remarkable in- ;i:e end of the first act how tho fun fh a slender foundation. But it continues and grows to the last curtain." One of the most hilariously ng farces ever written, especially suited to schools and Masonic Lodges. (Royalty, twenty-five dollars.) Price, 75 Cents. KEMPY A delightful comedy in 3 acts. By J. C. Nugent and Elliott Nugent. 4 males, 4 females. 1 interior throughout, Costumes, modern. Plays 2 1 ^ hours. "ernpy" has been such a tremendous hit in New York, Chicago wherever it has played. It snaps with wit and humor of the most delightful kind. It's electric. It's small- ly pictured. Full of types of varied sorts, each o a turn and served with zestful sauce. An ideal entertainment for amusement purposes. The story is about a high- falutin' daughter who in a fit of pique marries the young plumber- architect, who comes to fix the water pi; ise he "un< ! : read her book and having sworn to in that story lies all the humor that kept the a d of every act. Of course there are lots of ran:i: ; >h of which bears its own brand of laughter-making }>>. lio plot and the story are not the main tl. :-.<:e, the work of the family mixup is lively and rs.) Price, 75 Cent?, SAMUEL FRENCH, zr> West 45th Street, New York City FRENCH'S Standard Library Edition George M. Cohan Winchell Smith Booth Tarkingtun William Gillette Frank Craven Owen Davis Austin Strong A. A. Milne Harriet Ford Paul Green James Montgomery Arthur Richman Philip Barry George Middleton Channing Pollock George Kaufman Martin Flavin Victor Mapes Kate Douglas Wiggln Rida Johnson Young Margaret Mayo Roi Cooper Megrae Jean Webster George Broadhurst George Hobart Frederick S. Ishara Fred Ballard Percy MacKaye Willard Mack Jerome K. Jerome R. C. Carton William Cary Duncan Sir Arthur Conan Doyle Includes Play.*, Augustus lltumas Rachel Crutlier.s W. W. Jacobs Ernest Denny Kenyon Nii-hoisu:i Aaron H. V. EsaionJ Edgar Seiwyn Laurence Housnvm Israel Zangwill Walter Hackett A. E. Thomas Edna Ferber John Henry Aiears Mark Swan John B. Stapleton Frederick Lonsdale Bryou Ongley Rex Beach Paul Armstrong H. A. Du Souchet Ai!e J. Hartley Manners Barry Conner* Edith i:il,i Harold Brighouse Harvey J. O'Higgins Clare Kumtncr James Forbes William C. DeMi!!e '1 hoinp.?on Buchanan C. Haddon Chamfers Richard Harding Davis Louis N. Parker Ai.thony Hope Lewis Beach Rose .-lly ling itch Derr Biggcr:i .irst Cha: . miss Martha M.rton Robei t iiousum Carlu '.stein s Smith ottS ; nan Clavtuii Hi.i: Uiony Julie Lippman Paul Dickey frank Bacon a Paulton .\delaide AUittl: A. li. W. Catherine Chisholm Cushing J. C. and Elliott Edward Childs Carpenter Justin Huntiey McCar Madeline Lucette Ryley hine Prcat. French's International Copyrighted Edition contains ph _ and farces of international reputation; also recent profession. by famous American and English Authors. Our New Descriptive Catalogue Sent Free on Request Universi South( Libra Oldest Play Publisher in the World 35 West 45* Street, NEW YORK