./^ rubliiU<-a.l)>-.( ' .llllio* .t amlmrsh. MISCELLANEOUS WORKS OF TOBIAS SMOLLETT; TO WHICH IS PREFIXED, MEMOIRS OF HIS LIFE AND WRITINGS. IN FIVE VOLUMES. EMBELLISHED WITH TWENTY-SIX ENGRAVINGS, By Rowlandson Sf Others^ Fblume I. containing lilFB OF THE AUTHOR, FOEMS AWD FLAYS,- AKD FERDKTAND COVNT FATHOM. EDINBURGH : P'RINTED FOR C, ELLIOT, Jiy J. Orphoot, Blackfriars W}fml. 1809. o \^- -i^- V/ JL *y:H'*'r/U-i '::-: : // iii ) ..?\% /, TO MR, HENRY DAVIS, BOOKSELLER |N LQNDON. Abergavenny^ Aug, 4. RESPECTED SIR, 1 HAVE received your efteemed favour of the 1 3th ultimo, whereby it appeareth, that you have perufed thofe fame Letters, the "which were delivered unto you by my friend the reverend Mr. Hugo Behn ; and I am pleafed to find you think they may be printed with a good profpcdl of iiiccefs ; in as much as the objecflions you mention, I humbly conceive, are. fuch as may be re-dargued, if not en- tirely removed And, firft, in the firfl place, as touching what profecutions may arife from printing the private correfpondence of perfons ftill living, give me leave, with all due fubmifhon, to obferve, that the Letters in queftion were not written and fent under the feal of fe- crecy ; that they have no tendency to the malafama^ or prejudice of any perfon b wbatfoever \ ( i' ) whatfoever ; but rather to the informa*^ tion and edification of mankind : fo that it becometh a fort of duty to promulgate them in itfum publicum, Befides, I have confulted Mr. Davy Higgins, an emi- nent attorney of this place, who, after due infpe(5lion and confideration, de- clareth, That he doth not think the faid Letters contain any matter which will be held adlionable ^n the eye of the law. Finally, if yod c id'I fhould come to a right underftanding, I do declare, in verbofacerdotisy that, in cafe of any fuch profecution, I will take the whole ujon my own fhoulders, even quoad fine and imprifonment, though, I muil confefs, I fhould not care to undergo flagellation : Tarn ad turpitudinem^ quam ad amaritudi- nem pcena fpe&ans Secondly, concerning the perfonal refentment of Mr. Juflice Lifmahago, I may fay, non Jiocci facio I would not willingly vilipend any Chrifli- an, if, peradventure, he deferveth that epithet : albeit, I am much furprifed that more care is not taken to exclude from the commifhon all fuch vagrant fo- reigners as may be juftly fufped:ed of difaffecfticn to our happy conflitution, in church and ftate God forbid that \ fliould { V ) fliould be fb uncharitable, as to affiroi politiyely, that the faid Lifmahago is no better than a Jefuit in difguife ; but this I will aflert and maintain, totis viribusy that, from the day he qualified, he has never been once feen intra templi parietes^ that is to fay, within the parifti church. Thirdly, with refpe<5l to what pafled at Mr. Kendal's table, when the faid Lifmahago was fot brutal in his repre- henlions, I muft ijaform you, my good Sir, that I was obliged to retire, not by fear ^rifing from his minatory reproach- es, which, as I laid above, I value not of a rufh ; but from the iiidden efFedl produced by a barbel's row, which I had eaten at dinner, not knowing, that the faid row is at certain feafons violently cathartic, as Galen obferveth in his chapter *^^ tx^^t- Fourthly, and laflly, with reference to the manner in which I got polfeflion of thefe Letters, it is a circumftance that concerns my own confcience only ; fufficeth it to fay, I have fully fatisfied the parties in whofe cuftody they were 5 and, by this time, I hope I have alfo fatisfied you in fuch ways, that the lafl hand may be put to our agreement, and b 2 the t ri ) the work proceed with all convenient expedition ; in which hope 1 reft, Refpedled Sir, Your very humble fervant, Jonathan Dustwich. P. S. I purpofe, Deo volente^ to have the pleafiire of feeing you in the great city, towards AU-hallow-tide, when I fhall be glad to treat with you con- cerning a parcel of MS. fermons, of a certain clergyman deceafed ; a cake of the right leaven, for the prefent tafte of the public. Verbiim fapienti^ $5ff,. J.u to THE REVEREND. MR. JONATHAN DUSTWICH, AT SIR, 1 RECEIVED yours in courfe of poft, and fhall be glad to treat with you for the MS. which I have delivered to your friend Mr. Behn ; but can by no means comply with the therms propofed. Thofe things are fo uncertain Writing is all a lot-* { ^5i ) a lottery I have been a lofer by tiae works of the greatefl: men of the age I could mention particulars, and name/ names ; but don't chufe it- -The taflt of the town is fo changeable. Then there have been fo many letters upon travels lately publilhed What between Smol- lett's, Sharp's, Derrick's, Thicknefs's, Baltimore's and Baretti's, together widli. Shandy's Sentimental Travels, the public fecms to be cloyed with that kind of en- tertainment -Neverthelefs, I will, if yom pleafe, run the rifk of printing and pii- bliflxing, and you fhall have half the profits of the impreflion You need ndt take the trouble to bring up your fer- mons on my account No body reads ier- monsbut Methodifts and DiiTenters -Be- fides, for my own part, I am quite a ftran- ger to that fort of reading ; ^nd the tw perfons, whofe judgment I depended up- on in thefe matters, are out of the way 5 one is gone abroad, carpenter of a man. of war ; and the other has been iilly enough to abfcond, in order to avoid 3l profecution for blafphemy I'm a great lofer by his going off He has left a manual of devotion half finifhed on my hands, after having received money for Vlll ) tlie whole copy He was the foundeft divine, and had the moft orthodox pen of all my people ; and I never knew his judgment fail, but in flying from his bread and butter on this occafion. By owning you was not put in bodily fear by Lifmahago, you preclude your- felf from the benefit of a good plea, over and above the advantage of binding hirii over. In the late war, I inferted in my evening paper, a paragraph that came by the pofl, reflecling upon the behavi- our of a certain regiment in battle. An 6fficer of faid regiment came to my hop, and, in the prefence of my wife and journeyman, threatened to cut off my ars -As I exhibited marks of bodily fear, more ways than one, to the con- tidlion of the bye-ftanders, I bound hini vcr ; my a(5lion lay, and I recovered. As for flagellation, you have nothing to( fear, and nothing to hope, on that head There has been but one printer flog- ged at the cart's tail thefe thirty years ; that was Charles Watfon ; and he afliired me it was no more than a flea-bite. C ^ S ^ has been threatened feveral times by the Houfe of L ; but it came to no- thing. If an information fliould be moved ( ix ) wiovcd for and granted againfl: you, as th^ editor of thefe Letters, I hope you will have honefty and wit enough to appear and take your trial If you ihould be fentenced to the pillory, your fortune is made As times go, that's a fure ftep to honour and preferment. I fhall think myfelf happy if I can lend you a lift j and am, very fincerely, Yours, / London^ Aug, lo. Henry Davis. t pieafe give my kind fervice to your neigh- bour, my coulin Madoc I have lent an Almanack and Court-kalendar, di- redled for him ^t Mr. Sutton's, book- feller in Gloucefler, carriage paid, which he will pleale to accept as a fmall token of my regard. My wife, who is very fond of toafled cheefe, prefents her ccmpliments to him, and begs to know if there's any of that kind, which he was fo good as to fend us lafl Chriftmas, to be fold in London, H. D. UFE OF t SMOLLETT, M. D ^'p'OBIAS SMOLLETT, an author whose writings will JL transmit his name with honour to posterity, was born in ^ 1720, at a small village tailed Dalquhurn, within two miles of ^ Cameron, on the banks of the Leven, in Scotland. He re- V ceived a classical education at the grammar school of Dun- ^ barton, was put apprentice to a surgeon in Glasgow, and afterwards attended the medical classes in Edinburgh } but left the university without taking a degree, -. While he pursued his medical studies at Edinburgh, he wrote, at the age of eighteen, a tragedy, founded on the story V of the assassination of James I. of Scotland, by his uncle Wal- ^^ ^er Stuart, Earl of Athol, in l^S?. In 1739 he went to . iiondon, the great field of genius and exertion $ but did not [i meet with that success which he expected would have been the oT result of the patronage of some literary friends, to whom he ^ had been strongly recommended ; so that his outset in life wa$ in the capacity of a surgeon's n^ate in the navy. ; , It is said, and probably with some truth, that the chief in- ACidents in the early part of his life were given to the public, in one of the first and best of his productions, the Novel of Rode- rick Random ; however, whether th^.t report is well founded Ni or not, certain it is, that he was at the siege of Carthagena, s ?nd, in the before-mentioned novel, he has given a faithful ac- ^ count of the management of that ill conducted expedition, which j^ he censures in the warmest terms, from circumstances which O fell under his own particular obseWation. He is supposed '^'^ to have been the editor of * A Compendium of authentic Voy- ages, digested in a Chronological Series,' 7 vol. l2mo, pub- lished in 17.56 ; amongst which is inserted a short narrative of the expedition to Carthagena, in 1741, written with great spirit, but abounding with too much acrimony. By means of his acting in this capacity in the navy, he acquired his know- ledge of sea characters, which he has drawn in so masterly a manner, and at the same time so correctly technical, as to ex- cite general admiration, and afford a finished model for future aorelists and dramatists to copy. His connection with the A Life of Dr. Smollett. sea seemt not to have had a long continuance, and it is proba- ble, that he wrote several pieces before he became known to the pubhc bv his capital productions. The first piece we know of with certainty is The Advice and Reproof a satire in two parts, printed first in the years 174^ and 1747, and since re- printed in the collection of his poL-tical pieces. About this period he wrote for Mr Rich an opera, intituled Alceste, which has neither been performed nor printed. The music to it was composed by Mr. Handel, who finding that no use was intended to be made of it, af"terwards adapted it to Dryden's lesser Ode- for St Cecilia's Day. , ' In 174'7 he presented his tragedy ^rtlie Regicide, for per- formance at Drury Lane Theatre, and experienced that treat- ment which young authors frequently meet with from theatri- cal managers and affected patrons ; for after being buoyed up aind Mattered for a considerable time, his play was finally ne- glected. In the preface to the publication of this piece, bjr subscription, in the year 1749, he bitterly exclaimed against false patrons, and the duplicity of theatrical managers. He tells us that hie * Tragedy, with some recommendations from his literary friends, was taken into the protection of one of those little fellows, who are sometimes called great men, and like other orphans, neglected accordingly.* * Stung with resentment,* he adds, at what I took for contempt, I resolved to punish this barbarous indifference, and actually discarded my patron, consoling myself with the bar- rej[v praises, of a few associates, who, in the most indefatigable manner, employed their time and influence in collecting from all ijuarters, observations on my piece; which, in consequence of ihese suggestions, put on a new appearance almost erery day until my occasions called me out of the kingdom '-The warmth *and impetuosity of his temper hurried him, on this occasion, in- to unjust reflections against the late Lord Lyttleton, and Mi*. 'David Garrick ; the character of the former he satirized in Ills novel of Pcrcgriiie Pickle, and he added a burlesque of thJe Monody written by that Nobleman, on the death of his Lady. Against Mr Garrick he made illiberal, ill founded criticisms, yiad his Novel of Roderick Random, gave a very unfair repre- sentation of his treatment of him rtspecting this tragedy. Of Xh'ii conduct he afterwards repented, and acknowledged his er- Vors, though in the subsi'quent editions of the novel, the pas- sages, which were the hasty effusions of disappointment, are not, as we think they should have beeti, omitted. Desirous, however, of ' doing justice in a work of truth, for wrongs done in a work of fiction,' (tri use his own expr-rssion) in giving Life of Dr. Smollett. ' '- a sketch of the liberal arts in his History of England, he re- marked, * the exhibitions of the .Stage were improved to the most exquisite entertainment by the talents and management of Garrick, who greatly surpassed all his predecessors of this, and perhaps every other nation, in his genius for acting, in the sweetness and variety of his tones, the irresistible magic of his eye, the fire and vivacity of his action, the e|egance of attitude, and the whole pathos of expression. , * Candidates for literary fame appeared, even in the higher sphere of life, embellished by the nervous sanse, and extensive erudition of a Corke, bjj the delicate taste,; the polislied muse, and tender feelings of a Lyttleton.' Not satisfied with this public declaration of his sentinaents he wrote in still stronger terms to Mr. Garrick. < Dear. Sir, Chels-eay Jan. 27, 1762. * I this morning received your Winter s Tale, and am agree- ably flattered by this mark of your attention. What I ha\ie said of Mr Garrick, in the History of England was, I protest, the language of my heart. I shall rejoice if he thinks I have done him barely justice. I am sure the public will think I have 'done no niot-e than justice. In giving a short sketch of the li- beral arts, I could not with any propriety, forbear mentioning a gentleman so eminently distinguished by a genius that has no rival. Besides, 1 thought it was a duty incumbent on me in particular to make a public atonement id a- work of tnith, for wrongs. done him in a work of fiction. '' ' ' . ' Among the other inconveniences arising from ill health, I deeply regret my being disabled from a personal cultivation of >your good will, and the unspeakable enjoyment I should some- times derive from your private conversation, as well as from the pubhc exertion of your talents ; but, sequestered as I am from the world of entertainmentj the consciousness of standing well in your opinion v^ill ever afford singular satisfaction to, "; Dear Sir, .' / v ,. ; rti-i . ) c-r!- w' . i; " -Your verv humble servant, :;' i . ' " ' T. SMOl-LETT* i In the year 1 748 he published his Novel of Roderick Ran- dom, a book which continues to have a most extraordinary sale and first established the Doctor's. reputation. All the first vo- lume and the beginning of the second, appear to consist of real incident and character. The Judge, his grandfather; Crab ";ajid Potion, the two apothecaries ; and "Squire Gawky, were characters well known in that part of. the. kingdom where the scene was laid. Captains Oakhum and Whiffle, Doctors Mac- i Lift oj Dr. SmoUeti. shane and Morgan, were also said to be real peifoiiagea j but tfie names we have never learned, or have now ^c gotrei:. A Tsookbiiider and barber long eagerly contended for being shad- dowed under the name of Strap ; but their names are now for- gotten ' By the publication of that work, the Doctor had acquired o great a reputation, that henceforth a certain degree of suc- cess was insured to every thing known or suspected to proceed from his hand, in the year 1751 the Adventures of Per [grim Pickle appeared; a work of great ingenuity and contrivance, in which he introduced the historj^- of the celebrated Lady Vane, the materials of which, it is said, she herself furnished. This excited much attention, and contributed greatly to its success. Lady Vane was deemed the finest minuet dancer in England; and in personal charms and accomplishments, inferior to no woman who has appeared in the eighteenth century To the fate of this lady, Dr. Johnson has a striking allusion in his f Yanity of Human Wishes ' * Yet Vane couM tell wkat illtfrom beauty fprin^, * And Scdley curPd the form' that pleaf da to a personal attack.' l4,^the year 1756 he set on foot the Critical Revttw. and ontifiVFQ ^^^ piiiicipal manager of it, till he went abroad for the first time, in the year 1763. To speak impartially, he wa perhaps, too acrimonious sometimes in the conduct of that work and at the same time too severe, and displayed too much sensu bility when any of ihf unfortunate authors, whose works he lie had, it may be, just^ly censured, attempted to retalute. Among other controversies, which his engagements in thil publication involved him, the most material in its consequto- ,)Ces was that, which wae occasioned by his remarks on a pamph. let published by Admiral Knowles. That gentleman, in de- j^eiice of his conduct, on the expedition to Rochfort, published .a vindication of himself, which, falling under the Doctor's ex- .amination, produced some very severe strictures both on the performance, as well as on the character of the writer of it. The Admiral immediately commenced a prosecution against tlie printer; declaring, at tlie same time, that he desired only to be informed who the w^riter was, that, if he proved to be t gentleman, he might obtain the satisfaction of one from him. In this affair the Doctor beliaved both with prudence and .with spirit, i Jesirous of compromising the dispute with the Admi- ral in an amicable manner, he applied to his friend Mr. Wilkes, to interpose his good offices with his opponent, in the follow- ing letter : Dear Sir, Chelsea^ March 24, 1759, * Ecce Iterum Cr'isplnus Your generosity with respect to Johnson (Mr. Wilkes, at the intercession of Dr. Smollett, had procured the liberty of Dr. Johnson's servant, Francis Barber a black man, who had been impressed,) shall be the theme of our applause and thanksgiving. I shall be very proud to find myself comprehended in your league offensive and defensive; nay, I consider myself already as a contracting party, and have recourse to the assistance of my allies. It is not, I believe, unknown to you, that Admiral Knowles has taken exception at a paragraph in the Critical Review of last May, and com- meuced a prosecution against the printer. Now, whatever ter- mination the trial may have, we shall infallibly be exposed to ,a considerable expence, and therefore I wish to see the prose- icutioa quashed. Some gentlemen, who are my friends, have -Undertaken to find out, ^d talk with those who are supposed to have influence with the said Admiral; may I beg tb^saJiie ' life of DrSmoHeH. favour of you and your friends ? The trial will come on in the^ '!')eginning of Mar, and, if the affair cannot be compromised, we intend to kick up a dust, and die hard. In a word, if that foolish Admiral has any regard to his own character, he will 'be quiet,' ra^the'f than prOYoke farther the resentment of, ;; '^-;- /''. ' Dear Sir, &c v';" ; T. SMOLLETT/ *'^ The Admi^U continued inflexible ; and just as sentence was "^^ojng to be pronounced against the printer, the Doctor came into court, avowed himself the author of the strictures, and Medared himself ready to give Mr Knowles any satisfaction he- cftoose. The Admiral immediately commenced a fresh action against the Doctor, who w;i9 found guilty, fined 100!. and cod- .demued to three months imprisonment in the King's Bench. ' "* F^om the commencement of the Review, Dr Smollett was "Always considered as the author of it: and by this means he be- "ijame frequently censured on account of articles in which he "had n'o concern. " , Many disputes arose with different writers, who considered themselves injured by the severity of the Doctor's criticisms ; indeed, it may be affirmed, that seldom a month passed with- out a complaint on that head, and' those not often couched in the miost decent terms. ' On the publication of the Rosciad, Churchill, the author, considering himselt and some of his friends, as very ir.iuriously treated in the Review of that work ; and imagining Dr Smol- lett the author of the offensi%'e article, retorted with great spirit, in his excellent poem, intitled. An Apology to the Critical ^Reviewers, in the following lines '. , ; ' Whence could arjfc this mighfy critic fpleen, The Muse a rrifler, and her theme fo mean ? Wh;^t had I drire, that angry Heaven fliouid sent! *i'he bittereft fic where ittoft 1 wilh'd a friend ? Oft liath my tongue been wanton at thy name, Ana haii'd tht honours cjf thy matchless fame. For trie ! ft ho&'y /'/f'/'m^ hire the ground, So noblrr I'irkti-. Oand supi'rbly bound. Vrom Livj ^ temple tear rh' hiftoric crowB Whick with mr.re jufticc blooms upoa thine own ' It appears, however, he vi'as mistaken in his suspicion ; for Dr Smollett hearing that Mr Colman had also accused him of having made an att:ick on his moral character in the Review, the Doctor exculpated lnmself in a letter to Mr Garriek, in which he declares, ' that he did not write one word of the article upon the i?OTf;W.' . i,... c* In the year 1757, Dr Smollett's Comedy of the Reprisals or Life of Dr Smollttt. y. The Tars of Old England, an after-piece of two acts, was per- ^ formed at Drury lane Theatre. He acknowledged Jiitnseir * highly obliged for the friendly care Mr Garrick exerted, in preparing it for the stage; and still more, for his acting the part ofLusignan, in Zara, for his benefit, on the sixth, instead of the ninth night, to which he was only entitled by the custona of the theatre.* Being informed attempts had been made to embroil him on this occasion with Mr Garrick, he wrote to that Gentleman : * Sir, Undt?rstand:ng from Mr. Derrick that some officious people have circulated reports in my name, with a view to prejudice rhe in your opinion. I, in justice to myself, take the liberty to assure you, that if any person accuses me of having spoken disrespectfully of Mr Garrick, of having hinted that he solicited for my farce, or had interested views in bring- ing it upon the stage, he does me wrong. Upon the word of a gentleman, the imputation is altogether false and malicious. Exclusive of other considerations, I could not be such an ideot to talk in that strain when my own interest so immediately re- quired a different sort of conduct. Perhaps the same insidious methods have been taken to inflame former animosities, which, on my part, are forgotten and self-condemned. I must own you have acted in the affair of the farce with that candour, openness, and cordiality, which even mortify my pride while they lay me under the most sensible obligation '. and I shall not rest satisfied until I have an opportunity to convince ^r. Garrick that my gratitude is at least as warm as any other of my passions. Meanwhile I profess myself, Sir, Your humble ervant, T.SMOLLETT.' In 1758, he published his Comjilete History of England, de duced from the Descent of Julius C/ssar to the Treat xf of jIIx la Chapelle. Though this elaborate work is said to have been composed and prepared for the press in the short space of four- teen months, to which the author might have been impelled by his necessities, it evinces astonishing powers of mind as well as most indefatigable application. Its sale, by the uncommon arts of publication used by the booksellers, was remarkably extensive ; the author is said to have cleared 20001 by it and the Continuation, in five volumes, octavo, in 1763 and 1765. He is supposed to have written, during his confinement in the King's Bench, the novel of Sir Launcelot Greaves, in which he has described some remarkable characters, then his fellow' 1 '^'fJfev/%rimottett. prisoners. This work was first printed in the British Mag*'^. xiae, which he conducted in 1760aii 1761, and afterwards in. two volumes duodecinso, 17f>2. In the year 1762, Lord Bute took the reins of goTernmet into his hands. His promotion was attended with unpopular measures; great dissatisfaction arose amongst many orders of men, and his Lordship found it necessary to employ some able writers to palli ite and defend the steps which had led to hi advancement. Amongst others Dr. Smollett was pitched u- pon, and he entered on the task appointed for him with great spirit. In defence of his patron, he immediately began x weekly pap>er, which he called The Briton. The first number made its appearance on the 29th of May 1762, and was im- mediately followed by the publication of the North Briton, which, in the end, entirely routed its antagonist, and dissolved the friendship that had long subsisted between the authors of the respective performances- The riton continued to be published until the 12th of February 1763, when it was laid down ; and very soon after, the person, in whose defence it was set on foot, fuidi.igthe stream of popular discontent too strong to be resisted, relinquished the post which had excited so much envy and clamour, and, on his resignation, it is said, entirely negkcted all the persons whom he had employed to write for him. Two months before the first number appeared, Smollett wrote the following letter to Mr Wilkes, dated Chel- sea, March 28. 1762. * "vly warmest regard, affection, and attachment, you have long ago secured. .My secrecy you may depend upon. Wheo I presume to differ from you in any point of opinion, I shall always do it with diffidence and deference. I have been ill these three months, but 'hope soon to be in a condition to pay my respects to Mr. Wilkes in person. iVi eanwhile I must beg t trouble him with another packet, which he will be so good as 'to correct at his leisure. That he may continue to enjoy his happy flow of spirits, and proceed through life with a flowing sail of prosperity, is the wish, and the hope, and the confident expectation of, &c.' Besides the Briton, Dr Smollett is sup- posed to have written other pieces in support of the cause he espoused. The neglect of his patron made a deep impression on his mind, and this, united to a sedentary life and assiduous appli- cation to study, having impaired his health, he went abroad with a view to re-establish it in the month of June 1763, and continued in France and Italy two years. He wrote an account f his travels, in a series of letters to some friends, which were aflei-wands jiiibljshdd in two Vblumea octavo, '1766; Ib" the lirsti letter : he assiglis thfe'''folkAving__jnwti^6 .:J^W i^hd^^ taking his journey to the Continent : In gniifym'g your curiosity, 1 shall find some amusement to beguile the tedious hours, which, witlwut somi& such employmenH, -would be ren- dered unsupportable by distemper and disquiet. You knew and pitied my situation, traduted by mahce, persecuted by .^action, and overwhelmed by the sense of a domestic calamity, which it was not in the power of fortune to repair.' By this domestic calamity, he means the loss of his only child.a daugh- ter, whom he loved with the tenderest affection. In the course f his trarels, he appears to have laboured under a perpetual depression of spirits, which subjected him to many and grievous bodily afflictions, i - To this cynical relation of his Travels, Mr Sterne is suppos- ed to allude, in the following passage of his Sentimental Jour- neys vol. 1. p. 80. * The learned Smelfungus travelled from Boulogne to Pan's from Paris to Rome and so on but he set out with the spleen and jauiidice, and every object he passed by was discoloured and distorted He wrote an account of theip but it was nothing but the ^(jcouiit of his.miserable feelings Met Smelfungus in the Grand Portico of the Pantheon he was just coming out of it. r" It is nothing but a huge cock- pit," said he. " I wish you had said nothing worse of tie Venus of Medicis," replied I for in passing through Flo- rence, 1 had heard he had fallen foul .uppp the Goddess, and used her worse than a common strumpet, without the least provocation in nature I popped iipon Smelfungus again at Turin, in his return home, and a sad tale of sorrowful adven- tures had he to tell, wherein he spoke of moving accidents hy flood and Jieldy and. of the cannib.als which eat each other; the Anthropophagi He had been flayed alive, and bedeviled, and worse used than St. Bartholomew, at every stage he had come at. " I'll tell itj*' cried Smelfungus, *' to the world." You had better tell it,'* said I, " to your physician." In 1769 he again embarked in political controversy, and published \ns jidventures of ao Atom, a political romance, in two volumes, duodecimo, exhibiting, under fictitious characters, the conduct and dissensions of the several political parties in Great Britain, from the commencement of the French war in 1754, to the dissolution of Lord Chatham's administration in 1768. He seems in this work to havd relaxed in his attachment to Lord Bute, as much as he did in the Continuation of his History \o Lord Chatham ; indeed he had been equally disappointed B . . 14 Life of Dr SmolUt, in his expectation of patronage from those two noblemen ; a eircumstance which has a wonderful influence on the pens of Piplitical writers. . u In 1770, finding his health still in a declining state, he went to Scotland, hoping that exercise and his native air would re- store him to his former vigour ; but in this, as in many other expectations, he was disappointed. In 1771, soon after his return from Scotland, he published The Expedition of humfihry Clinker., in three volumes, duode- cimo ; a work which met with the most favourable reception from the public ; but still finding his health continuing to de- cline,and meeting with freali mortifications and disappointments, he went back to Italy, and died near Leghorn, October the 21st, 1771. Since his death, a monument has been erected to his memory neaY Leghorn, on which is inscribed an epitaph, written in Latin by his friend Dr. Armstrong, author of The Art of Preserving Healthy and many other excellent pieces ; the following is a translation of the epitaph. Her* J Reft the remain* : of TOBIAS SMOl.LErr, A North Britain. Who, iprunjf From an ancient atid rcsjx:ctable family, Shone forth an example ^' Of the virtues of former times. f'^" Of an ingenuous countenance, And manly make. With a bread animated br the jiifte^t fpirit, He was eminently dillinjjuifhed For great bcnevo lerce of temper , /.nd a generosity even beyond his fortune. His wit had every character Of fertile inventiveness, Of true pleafanlry, Of flexibility to every ieijcct, Fioni hi< aptnc's and wonderful capacity For evety kind of learning. The eiercife of thcie talent* Produced a variety of pleading fictions, in which. With great exuberance of fancy, And true humour. He laughed at and described '' The lives and manners of men, While (Shameful to relate !) This genius, This honour to his country. Met with nothiu;' V Life o/Dr Smollett. 1.5 these abandoned, worthI<, infipid timed But what was unfavourable (o him; Except indeed Their abundance of fupply to his pen Of matter of fatire ; Timci ! In which 'iii Hardly any literary merit . iT But such at was in the moft faUe or futile taile , 'r. Received encouragement From the paltry mock Mecajnases of Britain ! '-' ' In honour to the memory > tutjj Of this moft worthy and amiable (,(^J 3 ^^6rtJ ^j ^$i'i\ Member of Society, p > r .i-,v ^ *i kJ ^Hj Sincciely rejretted by many friends, I 1 hii monument ^^^ Wa bjr his much beloved and affectionate wife, nn il^ Dutifully and deservedly . 7rt>^kX> Consecrated. -;,;, Farther to perpetuate the memory of this celebrated writer, a pillar has been erected in 1774', on the banks of the Lpven, near the spot where he was born, by his cousin James Smollett, Esq. of bonhill. It was written in Lati% ./l^he followji^g. 13^ a translation. i: -iaaiMr > ,. ij or If elegance or taue and wit, , ... ' * ' If fertility of genius, > - > g-ioJ ' '<' And an unrivalkd talent jjIi In delineating the characters of mankind, i' ;: Have ever attraAed thy admiration, Pause awhile ": On the memory of TOBIAS SMOLLETT, M.D. One more than commonly endued with those virtues Which in a man and a citizen You would praise or imitate. ^'^^ icitoaos Having fecured the applause Ofpofterity, By a variety of literary abilities, And a peculiar felieity of composition, By a rapid and cruel diflemper, ' Snatched from this world in the 5 ift year of his age- Far alas ! from his counuy, He lies interred aear Leghorn, in Italy. Id teftimony of his many and great virtues, This empty monument, The only pledge alas 1 of his affection, Is erected On the banks of the Leven, The scene of hit birth and of his latest poetry. By Jam| Smoilett, of Bonhill, His cousin ; ."WO ii<5> ! ' 1.6 , L'tj\ ofjflr. SfH(^Meti. Who Ihoifid .r4hc? have cxped;d tl.u5 lad tribute frjm hirn. . .,, ' . Gi>| and rc'i^ierober This hononr was hot given -alpivc to the memory of the Deceafed, but for the. encouragement of others : Dcferve like him, and be alike rewarded. Some time after his decease, his name was affixed to a Trans- lation of Telemachusy in tw6 Voliar^eSj duodecimo, and tb a Translation of Oil BlaS, in four voTumes, duodecimo. A Translation of Voltaire's Works, published in twenty-seven volumes, octavo, m 1763, aleo. bore his name in conjunction with that f Dr Franklin ; but it is known that he contributed very little to that elaborate work. He had' 3evottd much time in the latter part of his life, to the preparation of a new edition of the yincient und Modern Universal B'utory, and had written him- self for that great undertaking, the History cf France, Italy and Germany. In fine, he was concerned in- a mnltiplicity of liter- ary productions, to which his name was not affixed, :"''A review of the domestic life of our Author will not afford Bi'uch pleasure to a benorelent mind. He. married Miss Las- celtes,^ lady from Jamaica, by whom he had a daughter, whose preiriature death made such an irideltble iinpression on hitn; as no time nor circumstance could efface. At his death- he left' behind him a widow in embarrassed circumstances, and in a foreign countrj'. But a respect for his memory, called forth the exertions of benevolence, to relieve her from some tempora- ry distress. The Tragedy of Venice Preserved was performed at the Theatre Royal, Edinburgh, March 3d, 1 784, for her be- nefit, and the money remitted to Italy. To attract the public curiosity, and add to the receipts, Houston Stewart Nicol- son, Esq. generoflsly undertook the part of Pierre, and the following Prologue, attributed to the pen of Professor Richard- son of Glasgow, author of Poems, chiejly Rural, and other elegant productions was spoken by Mr. Woods: Though lettered i^opie, and polilh'd Greece could boatt The splendid table arjd the courteous hoft-^- Thc rites to ftrani^ers due Though poets (ing This mighty warrior, or that powerful king, The wanderer's fricud; yet ftill, whate'er is tolt! By modern poets, or br bards of old, Is rivall'd here; for here, with joy we see The heart-feJt blifi of heavenly charity ! See her with rapture sptead her willing handa, Ar.d throw her b'e>srng into foreign lands; Dry up the tear fhe never faw to flow, And ca^er catch the diilant fi^h of woe; fn vain fejs,l>vell, and mountains rife iq vain, A widow 's'groan$^ are heard acrqfs.t^.(q^n. Life of Dr Stnolleit.. 17 A widow, now: \ias! how chang'd die 4i*y I \inyjiu Once the Narcissa'of our po:t's lay; ' / '> Now, fatal change ! (ofcv'ry bliss hereft, ' Kj"** s Nor child, nor friend, nor kind protestor left "l , r Spreads on a diftant fliorc her scanty board, -'t*^- And hur\ibly taKcs what strnnjiers can afford. '.ir Yet link'd to yoa by every tender tie '> To you fbe lifts the long-dtject-d eye; , . And thus (he speaks : " Who da/ed with manly raoe, * To laBi the vices of an inipious a<:c ? f '" " Who dar'dto feizc the bold hifloric pen, ** Paint living kings, and minjfters as nien?^ ' Wh sutig fad Scotia's hapless fons forlorn, " Her broken peace, her freshed Ia)rel8 torn f u J.,, Qj, ^},o^ on oaten rccd by Leven's fide, '^1 ^-aA "^ Kuhg the fair ftream, and hailed the dimpling tide? [| ^^ 'pil: '. " Or who ? fay he, fcr fuch, I'm sure arc here, '^> " Whofe honeft bofoms never yet knew fear ; m:{ h rri " Sons of the north, who (tern cotruptioo's tide, / - -^ ;;" " Your country's honour; and your nation* pride, .^^ /ij ' *-kt Lords of the lion heart and ea^le eye, fij^i J " Who h*ed no fiorm that howls along the sky , jij. *' Say y6 Whofe lyre to ni;iiily numbers ftrung, 'f^' >' The gloriou* blifs of independence fung ? _ . ' Who felt that piovyer, and still adorn'd bis fhrine ? .\''"^' It was your; Smollett ! Oh ! he once was mice." ,, *4-- , Toers ftopp'd her utt'rancc, else she would have faid ' '^3U9j*' Like him be bold, in virtue undismay'd ; '- ,?Usrf*' Let independence all your anions guide, ;-Ji ? The character of Smollett, though with some degree of Uiat ^a^tiality which is inseparably annexed to friendship, has been drawn, and not inaccurately, in the epitaph on his monument near Leghorn, by his friend Armstrong, and also in the in- seriptioQ, on the pillar erected to his memory on the banks of the Leven. He has also introduced his gwn character in the dedication of Count Fathcm. , His manner of giving is described in Humphry Clinker ^ where young Melford is supposed t^ dine wif;h him at , his house in Chelsea. ^i * He carried me t dine with S , whom you and I baTciong kno.wn by his writings. He lives in the skirts of the to\yn, and every Sunday his house is open to all unfortunate |jrot}iers pf the quill. J, was civilly received, in a plain, yet ^jbifJi-u a: ::,(>: ii^^.'-vyj ' T A'Axiice ana Reyfobf, a Satire. tHiOau i i^-The hist'orr) ofEjt^fand. ^ :>Vi,iDii "!^')dvr -jdl^ Ode, ',. Hiourn haptens CaUdoni a, moti-r.'^ ^ tvol '.iJlid ^%Ode to Lven,Wtt.tti:^ ^ 18 Life of Dr Smollett. decent habitation, which opened into a \cxy pleasant garden, kept iu order . and indeed, I saw none of the outward signs of authorship either iu the house or the landlord, who is one of the few writera of the age that stand upon their own foundation without partrimony and above dependence. By all account S is not without weakness and caprice ; but he is cer. tainly good humoured and civilized ; nor do I find that there is any thing overbearing in his disposition' Having given the outlines of the character of our Author, as drawn^by his encomiasts on the monuments erected to his memory, and by himself in one of his novels ; we shall present our readers with an ample detail of the same, with strictures on his writings from the pen of the learned and judicious Dr An- derson, who has done the greatest justice to Smollett, and the highest honour to his own candour and liberality. In his person and manners,' (says this biographer) ' Smol- lett was fashioned to prepossess all men in his favour. His fi- gure was graceful and handsome, and in his air and manner there was a certain dignity which commanded respect, joined with a benignity that inspired affection. With the most polished manners and finest address, he possessed a loftiness and elevation of sentiment and character without pride or haughtiness. His general behaviour bore the genuine stamp of true politeness, the result of an overflowing humanity and goodness of heart. He was a man of upright principles and of great and extensive benevolence. He not only embraced, but sought and created occasions of doing good. He was the reliever of the distressed, the protector of the helpless, and the encourager of merit. His conversation was sprightly and agreeable. In the domestic relations his conduct was tender, affectionate, and exemplary. In his opinions of mankind he was candid and liberal. To those who were above hino, he allowed the due superiority. To his equals and inferiors, he behaved with ease and affability without the insolence of familiarity, or the parade of condescen- sion. With his amiable quaUties and agreeable manners he u- nited courage and independence- * In the declaration of his opinions, he was open ; in his actions he was intrepid. No danger could prevent him from saying or doing those things which he conceived in themselves to be right, and in their consequences to be useful to his friends, or to his country. He had been bred a Tory, and generally adhered to the principles of that party ; but he hud a sincere love for his country, and a diffusive benevolence for the whole human race. His experience in the world inflamed his hatred Life of Dr Smolldt. t9 against vice and corruption in proportion to his love of virtue and zeal for the public good, and he thought it no violation of charity to stigmatize vice, profligacy, and hypocrisy. But in tupport of persons and measures he sometimes only considered the persons and measures, without taking other objects and re- lations into the account. He was more frequently influenced by personal attachment, and hurried on by present impulse, ' than guided by comparative views of real advantage, examined by impartial reason. His opposition to the great, often, in its warmth, exceeded the importance of the object. He was occa- lionally misled by a heated imagination, strong resentments, and the mortification of disappointed hoj>es, into bitterness and party virulence, long kept alive by the indecent and irritating provocations of trumphant adversaries. * Under these impressions his descriptions as an historian were often distorted, and his decisions as a critic on the literary pro. ductions of some of his contemporaries, were sometimes unwar- rantably warped by narrow prejudice, and expressed in the harsh terms of coarse contempt. Whatever end he pursued, he fol- lowed it with an eagernessthat was not necessary to compass it. The defects in his temperament, natural or habitual, made him unprosperous and unhappy. His sensibility was too ardent ; his passions were too easily moved. His candour frequently became credulity ; his liberality often subjected him to decep- tion. His favors were generally bestowed on the most unde- serving of those who had recourse to his assistance ; not so much for want of discernment, as want of resolution, for he had not fortitude to resist the importunity of even the most worthless. In friendship he was ardent and steady ; but in the latter part of his life, he sometimes very feelingly bewailed the treachery and perfidy he had experienced, in consequence of the mistaken connections he had formed, and to which every man of warm attachments will be exposed.' * As he was warm in his friendship, so was he implacable in his resentment. Having been treated with repeated insults by a man, whose name was Peter Gordon, he was provoked to chastise him in such a manner, as induced him to commence a prosecution against him, in the Court of King's Bench, for an intended assassination. Of the charge he was honourably ac- quitted by the verdict of the Jury. The Honourable Hume Campbell, a barrister of the first eminence in that day, who w^as retained in behalf of the prosecutor, having treated our author with much sarcastic severity in opening the cause ; he (^rew lip th foHcfwing ' rough draught of a letter,'' demanding 30 Life of Dr Smollett. adequate reparation for ;he injurious trtatraent he had rereivcti at his hatid, which he commGnicated to a friend, with a^ oDtej signifying his intention to send it to the barrister, provided it contained nothing actionable. It is not known v/hether it ^fnf sent to that gentleman, or whether he retmcted what he said tp Smollett's prejudice. We give it however, iu this place, not only as it shews his sentimentsconcerning Mr Hume Campbell, a. celebrated counsellor and parliamentary orator of that time, but as it exhibits, in a very striking light, some of the leading features of his own character. " I have waited several dayfe in hope of receiving from you an acknowledgement, touching those harsh, unjustifiable, (and let me add) unmannerly expressions, which you annexed to my name in the Court of King's Bench, when you opened the cause between me and Peter Gordon ; and as I do not find that you have discovered the least inclination to retract what you said to my prejudice, I have taken this ftiethod to refresh your mcmory,and to demand &up:j satisfaction as, a gentleman, injured as I am, has a right to claim." . r: r; " The business of a counsellor, is, I'apprehend, to investi- gate the truth in behalf of his client ; but surely he has no pri- vilege to blacken and asperse the character of the other party, without any regard to veracity or decor.um. That you assumed this unwarrantable privilege in commenting upon your brief, J beheve you will not pretend to deny, when I remind you of those peculiar flowers of elocution which you poured forth on that notable occasion. First of all, in order to inspire the court with horror and contempt for the defendant, you gave the jury to understand, that you did not know thi? DrSmollet, and indeed his character appeared in such a light from the facts contained in your brief, that you never shonld desire to know him. I should be glad to know of what consequence it could be to the cause, whether you did or did not know the defendant, or whether you had or had not an inclination to be acquainted with him ? Sir, this was a pitiful personality, calculated to depreciate the character of a gentleman to whom you was a stranger, merely to gratify the rancour and malice of an aban- doned fellow, who had fed you to speak in his cause Did I ever seek your acquaintance or court your protection ? I had been informed indeed that you was a lawyer of some reputation, and when the suit commenced, would have retained you for that reason, had I not been anticipated by the plantiff ; but, far from coveting your acquaintance, I never dreamed ^f ex- changing a word with you on that or any other subject : you lJfi-'of-J)rJSmoJIetf. 2i inJglrL tlierefore have spared your insidious declaration^ until I had put: it into your power to mortify me with a repulse, which^ upon my hoHour, would never have been th(j case, were you a much greater man than you really are: yet this was not the on- ly expedient you Uocd to prepossess the jury against.me. You was hardy enough to r&present me as a pereon devoid of all humahity and remorse,' as a barbarous ruffian, who, in a coward- ly manner, had, with two associates as barbarous ae myself^ tailed a peaceable g'entlemaa out of his lodgings, and assaulted him in the dark with intent to murder. Such an horrid impu- tation, publicly fixed upon a person whose innocence you can hardly fail to know, is an outrage for which 1 behevcj I might find reparation from the' law itself, notwithstanding your artful manner of qualifying the expression by spying provided the facts can be proved. This low subterfuge may, for aught I know, creen you from, a prosecution at law, but can never acquit you in that court, which every man of hoHour holds in his own breast. I say you must know my innocence from the weakness of the evidence which you produced, and with which you either was orought to have been previously acquainted^ as well as from my general character, and that of my antagonist, which it was your duty to have learned. I will venture to say, you did know my character, and in your heart believed me incapable of such brutality ^s you laid to my charge, Surely I do not over-rate my own importance in affirming, that I am not so obscure in life as to have escaped the notice of Mr Hume Campbell, and I will be bold enough to challenge him and the whole world ti- prove one instance in which my integrity was called, or at least left, in the question. '" Have I not therefore reason to suppose that, in spite of your internal conviction, you undertook the cause of a wretch, whose ingratitude, villainy, and rancour, are, I firmly believe, without example in this kingdom ; that you magnified a slight correction, bestowed by his benefactor, into a dehberate and ma- licious scheme of assassination ; and endeavoured, with all the virulence of defamation, to destroy the character, and even the life, of an injured person, who, as well as yourself, is a gentle- nian by birth, education, and profession i *' After having sounded, the trumpet of obloquy in your preamble, and tortured every circumstance of the plantilPs evi- dence to my detriment and dishonour, you attempted to subject me to the ridicule of the court, by asking a question of my first witness, which had no more relation to the cause, than if you had desired to know the name of his grandmother.-r-What tjtle C ^-' Life of Dr. Smollell. had you to ask f a tradesman, if he knew me to be an author ^ What affinity had this question with the circumstance of the as- tauk I Was not this foreign to the purpose ? Was it not imper- tinent, and proposed with a vieiv to put me out of countenance, and to raise the laugh of the spectators at my expenec ? There, irrdeed, j^u was disappointed, as yoti frequently are in those }rtt!e digressire efforts by which yoU hiakc yourself remarkable. Thoujch I do not pretend to possess that superlative degree of effrontery, by which some people Trtake a figtrre at the bar, I hare a surance enough to stan^ the mention of my works with- out blushing, especially when I despise the taste, and scorn the principles of him, w1h> would turn them to disgrace. " On tlie whole, yon opened the trial with such hyperboKcal impetuosity, and conducted it with such particular bitterness and rancotM*, that every body perceived you was more than or- dinarily interested ; and I could not divine the mysterious bond of union that attached you to Peter Gordon, Esq. until you ftrmished me with a key to the whole secret, by that strong em- phasis with which you pronounced the words Ferdinand Count Fathom, 'riien I disco\-ered the source of your good-will to* ^vards me, which is no other than the history of a law-suit, in- serted in that performance, where the author takes occasion to observe, that the council behaved like men of consummate abili- ties in their profession; exerting themselves with equal industry, eloquence, and erudition, in their endeavours to perplex the truth, brow-beat the evidence, puzzle the judge, and mislead the jury. Did any part of this character come home to your own conscience ? or did you resent it as a sarcasm levelled at the whole bench without distinction I I take it for gi-anted this must have been the origin of your enmity to rae, because I can recoHrct no other circumstance in my conduct, 'by which I could incur the displeasure of a man^ whom I scarce knew by sight, and with whom I never had tlie least dispute or indeed concern. If this was the case, you pay a very scurvj' comphmeirt to your own integrity y by fathering a character which is not apphcable to any honest man, and give tlte worM a handle to believe, that our courts of justice stand greatly in need of reformation. - *' But whatever liberties of this kind aregrairted to the conustly no sort of freedom, h seems, must be allowed to the evidence, who by the bye, are of much more coirsequence to the cmise. - You win take upon you to divert tlic audience at the expence of a witt:ess, by hnpertinent allLieious to some part of his private character and affairs ; hiit ii" he pretends Xo retort the joke, you ihsiilt, bu9e, aii4brllor against him as afv iBip\nJent frflow, ^ho Ufe ofDr Sm9ilet(. 63 fails tn his respect to the court. It was in thi manner you be- haved to my first witness, whom you first provoked into a pas- sion by injurious insinuations; then you took advantage of the confusion which you had entailed upon him ; and lastly, yoii insulted him as a person who had shuffled in his evidence. This might have been an irreparable injury to the character of a tradesman, had not he been luckily known to the whole jwry. and many other persons in court, as a man of unquestioned pro- bity and credit. Sir, a witness has as good a title as you hvivt to the protection of the court, and ought to have more; becauge evidence is absolutely necessary for the investigation of truth, whereas the aim of a lawyer is often to involve it in doubt and obscurity. Is it for this purpose you so frequently deviate from the point, and endeavour to raise the mirth of the audience with flat jokes and insipid similies ? or have you really so mis- taken your own talents, as to set up for the character of a man of humour ? For my own part, were I disposed to be merrj', I ihould never desire a more pregnant subject for ridicule, than your own appearance and behaviour ; but as I am at present in a very serious mood, I shall content myself with demanding ade- quate reparation for the injurious treatment I have received at your hands ; otherwise I will in four days put this letter in the press, and you shall hear in another manner not from a ruffian and an assassin but from an injured gentleman, who is not a- shamed of subscribing himself," &c. * In the practise of physfc,, for w^nt of suppleness and perse- verence, he was never eminent. As an author, he was not so suocesful as his happy genius and acknowledged merit certainly deserved. His connections were extensive, and his friends nu- merous and respectable. He was intimately acquainted with the most eminent of his poetical and literary contemporaries. He was respected by the world as a man of superior talents, wit, ' and learning; but never acquired a patron among the great, who, by his favor or benificence relieved him from the necessity of writing for a subsistence. Booksellers may be said to have been his only patrons, and from them, he had constant employment in translating, compihng, and reviewing. No doubt he made a great deal of money by his writings ; and had he been a rigid econo- mist, and endued with the gift of retention, (to use his own ex- pression) he might have lived and died very independent. But his difficulties, whatever they were, proceeded not from ostentation or extravagance. He was hospitable, but not ostentatiously so ; and his table was plentiful, but not extravagant ; an irritable and impatient temper was his greatest failing ; but making due 24 Uje of Dr. SwolieH. allowance for a sp^t wounded by ingratitude, and irritated ; Ly the malignant shafts of envy, dullness, and profligacy, it WQuJd be difficult to name a man so respectable for the excellencies of Jiis mind, or amiable for the virtues of his heart, > _ * The predominant excellencies of bis intellect were fertiijtiy pffinvention, vigorous sense, brilliant fancy, ai^d vcrsatite, hu- mour. His understanding was quick and penetrating, his inia- gination was fertile, his memory retentive, and his humour o^-i- ginal. He shews in his writing, tha^ he was intimately ac- quainted with the Qreek and Rornan litefature, and had stadigd with success the various branches of modern learning. He wiw well versed in the history and politics of Europe, and in the constitution of his country. The principal subject of his enqui- ry was, the human character ; and in his literary career, the re- presentation of life and manners, his principal objects. Man he surveyed with the most accurate observation. His understand- ing, acute and vigorous, was well fitted for diving into the hu- man mind. His humour lively and versatile, could paint just- ly and agreeably what he saw. He possessed a rapid and clear conception, v%'ith an animated and graceful style. His observa- tions on life and manners are commonly just, stfong, and com- prehensive ; and his reasoning generally sound and conclusive. His perceptions of beauty are vivid and distinct, his feelings ar- dent, and his taste correct. Hi? humour, though lively and pungent, is not, perhaps, equal-in strength to that of Congreve, Swift, and Fielding. In chastenes^ .and delicacy it must be ad- mitted to be inferior to that of Adc|fson, but equal in purity and moral tendency to that of his contemporary' Fielding. ^ It is keen, sprightly, variegated, and founded in truth. It expo- ses successfully, folly, hypocrisy, impropriety, and such vices as are the objects of ridicule. To trace the latent sources of hu- imn action, and to develope the various incongruities of conduct arising from them, was the favourite bent of his mind ; as it was of Theop.hr astus, Bruyere, Moliercy Fiehlmg, and others : And in describing objects of this kind, whether in the way of fabulous narration, or dramatic composition, he is so pecuharly happy, that, as an humorous and pleasant painter of life and manners, he has reflected the highest honour on the place of his nativity, and must ever be considered by his country, junongst the first of persons in literary reputation. Smollett has distinguished liimself as a translator, an histo- rian, a novelist, a journalist of travels, a dramatist, and a poet, and must be acknowledged to have made a considerable addi- tion to the general stock of elegant and useful hterature. As a translator, he has been censured, and particularly with Life of Dr Smollett. -25 rt'spect to Don Quixotte ; which he seems lo haye anticipate4 from the following Adriertisetnent prefixed to the work } whej:- jn he informs us, '' that his aim in this undertaking was to main- tain that ludicrous solemnity and self-importance, by which the inimitable Cervantes has distinguished the character of Don Quixote, without raising him to the insipid rank of a dry phi- losopher, or debasing him to the melancholy cirsumstances and Unentertaining caprice of an ordinary madman ; and to preserve the native humour of Sancho Panza from degenerating into mere proverbial phlegm, or affected buffoonery ; that he has endea- voured to retain the spirit and ideas, without servilely adheiing. to the literal expressions of the original, from which, however, he has not so far deviated as to destroy the formajity of idiona so peculiar to the Spaniards, ^nd so essential to the character of the work ; that the satire and propriety of many of the al- lusions, which had been lost in the change of customs and the lapse of time, is restored in explanatory notes; and the whole conducted with that care and circumspection which ought to be exerted by every author, who, in attempting to improve upon a task already performed, subjects himself to the most invidious comparison." Smollett's translation of Don Quixotte has been put into a comparative view with the productions of Jarvis and M$tteuxy The version of Jarvis, in the opinion of some critics, is more ex- act, though less spirited and elegant. They admit, that the ge- nius of Smollett comes nearest to the great original, though it fails him in preserving the formality of the Spanish idiom. Motteux, they tTiink, excels Smollett in this respect, though in- ferior to him in genius. That the reader may form a judge- ment of the comparative merits of Motteux, Jarvis^ and Smollett, as translators of this inimitable work, we shall cite the cor^- parison of the ingenious author of a work, entitled, Jln Essay an the Principles of Translation. . ri : " Smollett," (says this writer) " inherited from nature a strong sease of ridicule, a great fund of original humour, and a happy versatility of talent, by which he could accommodate his style to almost every species of Avriting. He could adopt ^Iternate- ly^^he solemn, the lively, the sarcastic, the burlesque, and the vulgar. To these qualifications he joined an inventive genius and a vigorous imagination. As he possessed talents equal to the composition of original works of the same species with the novel of Cervante s, so it is not perhaps impossible to conceive a writer more completely qualified to give a perfect translation of that novel. 9B Life or Dr Smollett. fr- M MoUeux, with no great abilities as an original, appears to me/' (continues our essayist) " to have been endowed with a strong perception of the ridiculous in the human character ; a just discernni^nt of the weakness and follies of mankind. He seems likewise to have had a great command of the vanous styles which are accommodated to the expressions both of grave, burlesque, and of low-humour- Inferior to ^molleit in inventive genius, he seems to have equalled him in every quality essential- iy requisite to a translator of Don Quixotte. It may therefore be supposed, that the contest between them would be nearly e- qual, and the question of preference very difficult to be decided. It would have been so, had Smollett confided in his own strength, and bestowed on his task that time and labour which the lengtli and difficulty of the work required ; but Smollett too often wrote in such circumstances that dispatch was his prima- ry object. He found various English translations at hand, which he judged rrirght save him the labour of a new composi- tion. Jarvis could give him faithfully the sense of his author ; and it was necessary only to polish his asperities, and lighten his heavy and awkward phraseology. To contend with Motteux, Smollett found it necessary to assume the armour of Jar-vis, This author has purpoiely avoided, through the whole of bis work, the smallest coincidence of expression with Motteux, whom,with equal presumption and injustice, he accuses in his pre- face, of having * taken his version wholly from the French.' We find, therefore, both in the translation of Jartfis and that of Smollett, that there is a studied rejection of the phraseolo- gy of Motteux. Now Motteux, though he has frequently as- sumed too great a licence, both in adding to, and retrenching from tlie ideas of his original, has upon the whole, a very high degree of merit as a translator. In the adoption of correspond- ing idioms, he has been eminently fortunate ; and, as in these there is no great latitude, he has in general preoccupied the ap- propriated phrases, so that a succeeding translator, who pro- ceeded on tlie rule of invariably rejecting his phraseology, must have in general altered it for the worse. Such I have said, was the rule laid down by Jarvis, and by his copyiit and improver Smollett; who, by thus absurdly rejecting what his own judge- ment and taste must have approved, produced a composition de- cidedly inferior on the whole to that of Motteux." See Tytler's (Lord Woodhouselee) Essay en the Principles of Translationt p. 178 to 184-. The learned, judicious; and candid biographer to whom we are indebted for the ba-^is (;f these memoirs, observes on this Life of Dr. Smolleit. 'Hf jubject, that it ought to be remembered that Don Quix6tte i* the most difficult book in the world to translate, from the ex-* treme frequency of its idiomatic phrases : that few even of thff Spaniards of the present day, understand all its beauties^ w can explain the obscurities which the lapse of time has occasioned f and to transfuse all the spirit of Cervantes, his fine humour, and the beauty of his numerous allusions, into a foreign language, is a task which a genius equal to that of the inimitable author him- self could not perform without the same knowledge of the coun- try and of the times in which he lived ; including aho the mot extensive acquaintance with the languago, idioms, customs, hu- uiorous expressions, provincial phrases, and proverbial sayingj of the people from whom the translation is intended. Since there- fore the best translation of /) Quixotte we can look for, must be executed by a person possessed of a geniu* akin to the author, a.nd chiefly qualified by books, a better than Smollett's cannot be expected in our language.' Smollett, a* an historian, possesses great merit. Consideritig the time and circumstances in which his History of Etigiand wan written, it must be admitted to be a great effort of genius afld application. When his history appeared, Hume had not produ- ced his narrative of the earlier events of English history, and the works of Carte and Bradyy Oldmixon and Raptn, were almost consigned to oblivion. The public were desirous of having a concise, faithful, but animated. History of England, and the production of Smollett, comprising those ideas, was read with more pleasure and improvement than the tedious details of pre- ceding writers. Without enlarging on matters which convey little information or entertainment, he has concentrated all the particulars that are important or instructive. In digiiity of style, and minutene9 of philosophical disquisition, the sioperi- rity must be given to Hume; but in fehcity of sentiment, beau- ty of description, and aptitude of expression, Smollett has not been excelled. It has been remarked, with great justice, by hiA learned bio- grapher, that * in the pages of Smollett we do not fi;nd many applications of a philo^phical enquiry to the investigation ot fiaets as in those of Thuc'idydes or XeriofiJisn amongst the Grciaa historians, Salhsf or Tacitus amongst the Roman, or Hume and Gibbon amongst the British : But he has exhibited specimens of picturesque njjCTiiUveand---elgatexi^^ little inferior to the composition of Livy or Robertson.* If his Wstory is surveyed with an eye ol discrimination, it will appear t& have- been in some instances rather an indigested j^rformance, too ample for an abridgement, and too concise for '^8 Lift of Dr. Swoltetf. a histoiy. There are in it many instanced of sLroii g pic-jud ieei and glaring misrepresentations o facts, rncoinpatiblc with the principles of liberty, and repugnant to the interests of mankind; His partiality for a party is glaring throughout the work, and in stating political controversy, he is not upon the whole either caiidid or unbiassed. In his narrative of the rebellion in l74:5i he seems to have been actuated by an attachment not the most loyal, and to have attended rather to pathos in description, than truth in narration. In pourtraying charactersj which is gene- rally admitted to have been his foit, he wars more influenced by fancy than guided by truth. Upon the whole, his history, with fome imperfections, has many considerations to recommend it# and particularly the style, which is nervous, clear, boldj and florid, and happily adapted to instruct, ibyK keeping, up, tiie at'r fention of the reader, .,..?.. . i vi/ ; 1l.-jX'> In his Continuation he has been less pifrti^ and prejudiced than in his History. In his account of Parliamentary Debates, he is very copious and highly interesting. In his animadversions eo the bill for the relief of debtors, he has described the situa- tion and feeling of a man of a susceptible mind, in language so pathetic, that a compassionate reader must shed tears of sym- pathy at every lifie. Indeed he is peculiarly happy in addres* sing the passions, and his liistorical productions upon the whole do credit to his abilities ; but had they been composed with more deliberation, .they woul4 Mve j&pproach^ much nearer t perfection. -< .'} u ->fr r.'.v v . .r;- .n As a novelist Smollett claims the highest rank, and may justr ly be put in corii^etition-^ with Defoe, Richardson, and Fielding^ those great masters of poetic fiction. He has drawn the most atural pictures of life and manners, and exposed and ridiculed the vices and follies of mankind, with singular point and hu mour. His style is characterized by a remarkable appropriar tton of terms ; nilS~irQmour is sometimes broad and coarse, an4 he has exhibited scenes which might have a seductive influence with the young and inexperienced, who are not fortified against the force of bad examples. He has however marked those characters which are most injurious to society; and his writings, though objectionable in some instances, have, upon the whole, a moral tendency, and will ever conduce to entertainment and in- struction. In his Jdveniures of Roderick Random he is peculiarly happy in representing the difficulties to which a friendless orphan is ex- posed from want of his own knowledge of the world, and the eevy and selfishnass $o generally prevalent with mankind. The 'Life of Dr Smollett. 29 low scenes in which the hero of the piece is involved, are de- scribed w^ith infinite humour ; and the display of the manners and passions in their natural features, stript of the guise of af- fectation and ceremony, must have a powerful effect upon t^e sensible mind. Many of the characters, as Cawiei/, Straps Crab, Potion, Oahhtim, Whiffle, Machshans^ and Morgan, ar drawn from real life. The originals, in the author's time, wer known, pointed out, and were then, perhaps, more highly re- lished ; yet the description will never cease to please while raan- Mnd figure in life in the same characters, Mid are actuated by the same passions and motives. He seems to have enjoyed a singular pleasure in describing sea characters. His Trunion, Hatchway, and Pipes, in Peregrine Pickle, are highly finished originals j but Lieutenant Boivling in Roderick Random, equals, if not surpasses, any character drawn by the happiest genius of ancient or modern times. It has been pronounced, with great truth and justice, to be nature itself, perfectly original^ unique, and sui generis. The name has long be- come proverbial for an honest, blunt seaman, unacquainted with mankind and the ways of the world. The Adventures of Peregrine Pickle is a work of great meril and invention in the composition, and in which genuine humour and profound learning are so happily united, that it is difficult to determine which is predominant. It exhibits a well-drawn picture of human life, which the thoughtless may view with ad- vantage, and the prudent with self-complacency. It traces the> progress of headstrong passion from the wild mischievous boy, perverse and disobedient to his guardians, inciting a rebellion at school against the authority of his master, and afterwards, through th^ prevalence of unbroken pride, and unbridled appe- tite, launching into every excess of vice, folly, and dissipation, wasting his substance, injuring the woman of all others he loved, and at last pining in prison. In this wretched forlorn condition, detesting the world, abhorring himself, and loving Emilia to distraction, he protests to her brother, * that he had broke off all connections with all mankind, and that he impatiently long- ed for the hour of his dissolution, which if it should not soon arrive by the course of nature, he was resolved to hasten with his own hands, rather than be exposed to the contempt and more intolerable pity of a rascally world.' Roused at length by the voice of friendship, and again restored to affluence, he be- comes duly impressed with a sense of his culpability and vicious imprudence, and attends to the discharge of the duty he owes to society &nd love ; firmly persuaded, that after all the delu D 2,0 Life of Dr Smolktf, sions of vice and allurements of wealth, real happiness is only to be found in temperate enjoyment, domestic tranquiUity, and social virtue. In this work the feast given by the Republican Doctory after the manner of the ancients, has infinite merit in the description. It is replete with humour and satire, which, under the influence of tory principles, he directed with warmth against his whig- opponent, Akenside, In some parts of this novel, he has been censured, as low, scurrilous, and immorial ; but it should be re- membered, that in the delineation of certain characters, if tUe author adhere to nature and real life, he cannot avoid trespas- sing upon the rules of delicacy and decorum. Smollett's taste for ridicule and satire being so remarkably prevalent, he was not scrupulously nice in the choice of his characters, nor deli- cate in his delineation of them. For instance, the dialogue be- tween Pipes and the hedge nymph is too gross, but it is cer- tainly characteristic, and such language as might naturally be supposed to issue from the mouths of such people. There are other indelicacies which can only be justified upon the same principle ; yet with all its imperfections, this novel possesses great merit, far (as is well observed by a judicious critic) ex- ceeding the modern productions of frivolous fashion and sickly sentiment, which load the shelves of our libraries, and teach, nonsense and iniquity to our wives and daughters. His Adventures of Ferdinand Count Fathom and Sir Launcelot Greaves, are pleasing and interesting novels, though not so high in the estimation of the judicious as Roderick Random aad Pere^rint Pickle, There are manifest proofs of invention, cha- racter," composition, and contrivance in both these works, but many situations are described in them which are rather impro- bable, and some characters are drawn, which if not altogether unexampled, do not accord with modern manners, and therefore should not be introduced in a piece where the scenes are laid in modern times. The History of Count Fathom, if not very probable, is highly pleasing ; and if in some instances it is indelicate, it is not in any immoral. The design is evidently to detect imposture, guard the unwary against fraudulent practices, and instruct the ignorant in the knowledge of mankind ; but the leading cha- racters are delineated in so odious a light, as must be disgusting to our feelings, as well as shocking to humanity. A virtuous character indeed is opposed to relieve the mind from the con- templation of a series of profligate objects, and by affording an opportunity of viewing them in contrast, produces a good mo- Life of Dr Smollett. 5l ral effect. But, as is very justly observed by a commentator on Smollett's novels, * the advantage of introducing vicious and profligate characters into a moral production, by way of expo- sing them to shame and ridicule, may be reasonably doubted ; for a series of crimes and follies may give a mind untutored by experience, an insight into vice, which the good moral drawn from them riiay not prevent being put in practice.' But it must be confessed to the honour of our author, that in many parts of this novel he has closely imitated the style and manner of Le Sage, and worked up the scenes with wonderful skill and contrivance, so as to produce the most striking efFett. The History of Sir Launcelot Greavts, though the hint is bor- rowed from Don Quixotte, and the story is improbable, has much originality in the execution ; there are in it many charac- ters highly finished, and many strokes of genuine humour. Some actors in the scene are too frequently inti'oducedi and par- ticularly Captain Crolve, whose appearance is thereby rendered disgusting ; but the novel is U'ritten upon the whole with that spiriti jpointi and humour, which are the leading features of his productions in this branch of literature. His Adventures of an /:tom is rather &. novel in form than in substance. The circumstances are true in the main, though ex- aggerated occasionally by the flights of fancy, or obscured by the clouds of prejudice. Having pourtrayed the characters of the great men who contertded for the administration of the government of Japan (England) he states his design of giv- ing * a plain narration of historical incidents without pretending to philosophize hke Hume, or dogmatize like Smoliitt.' But pre- judice, notwithstanding this seeming profession of partiality, ne- ver appeared more glaringly than in this work, in which the whig party are treated with the most rancorous asperity, and the most dignified characters traduted in terms of the most oppro* brious obloquy. This work is written with his usual energy and felicity of expression, and displays in m.any parts of it a combifiation of profound learning and genuine humour, happily adapted to excel In ludicrous composition. Much commendation is due to his Exfiedition of Hurhjihrif Clinker, in which he has avoided the objections that have been made to Count Fathom and Launcelot Greaves. This \Vork con- sists of a series of letters by different persons, writteai in the style and manner of Richardson. The characters are natural, and the situations probable. It exhibits many useful and im- portant lessons applicable to the ordinary departments of life^ It is equal in spirit and vigour to any of his other novels, and is evidently the production of a mind stored with experimeiktal g2 Life of Dr Smollett. knowledge, as thf result of long and minute observation. It a- bounds with situations truly comic, as well as genuine humour, blends instruction with entertainment, and will therefore be a work always in request. We shall close our account of Smol- lett, as a novelist, with the following remarks of a judicious cri- tic, often quoted in the course of these memoirs. * A very obvious similitude,' (says that writer), < is obser- vable between the three heroes of Smollett's chief productions. Roderick Random^ Peregrine Pickle, and Mattheiv Br ambler are all brothers of the same family. The same satiric, cynical dis- positions ; the same generosity and benevolence, are the distin- guishing and characteristic features of all three ; but they are far from being servile copies or imitations of each other. He seems to have described his own character in the different stages and situations of life. * Roderick Random, Peregrine Pickle, and Humphry Clinker, are undoubtedly eflForts of genius and fancy, which_ rival the masterly productions of the moral, the sublime, the pathetic^ but tiresome, Richardson, with all liis profound and accurate knowledge of the various workings of the human heart ; and the ingenious, the humorous, but diffuse Fielding, with all his wit, learning, and knowledge of mankind. That Fielding fre- quently displays a thorough acquaintance with nature, aad that innumerable passages may be pointed out in Richardson, which do equal credit to the goodness of his heart, and the depth of his understanding, cannot be denied; yet after perusing the wire- drawn pages of " Pamela, Clarissa, and Crandison, or the com- mon place introductory discussion and diffusive narrative of Joseph jindreivs, Tom Jones, and Amelia ;" we never quit them with so much rcluctanca as we feel in closing the pages of Smol- lett, who with less regularity of fable, and without introducing so much of what may be called fine writing, posseses, in an emi- nent degree, the art of rousing our feelings, and. fixing the at- tention of his readers. As a Journalist of Travels, our author, it must be acknowledg- ed, has exposed the weak side of hutnan nature, in discovering much pctulancej3Jl.SeralTty, and some degree of spleen. This error or foible has been palliated by his friends, who have impu- ted his want of candour to the effects of a mind oppressed by many di<;appointments and domestic calamities. As a philosopher he should not in his writings have been affected by these impres- sions ; but as a man, and a man of feeling, he may be pardon- ed for indulging a vein of sarcasm on a world of which he de- served so much, and received so little. , ;V . i;; .: ,r :^ Notwithstanding these defects, the relation of his travels, u- Life of Dr Smollett, < 93 pon the whole is entitled to commendation. It is founded, upon experienne* and contains the obseryationS-Of a man of penetra- tion tnd.id^cerflrnsat free from partiality, exhibiting a naked iew of men, and things, as they are. The de&ign,jjL gpod, be- ing calculated to detect errjor-stflblith twrthr-^OFFec^ false no- tions, and fix the standard of right and wrong, and shew man- kind what they are and what they ought to be. I chiefly consulted,'" says Lord Gardenstone,' in his TrtteU ling Memorandums y *Keysler, Moo re, and Smollett. I wasliest pleased with my old and exoellent friend Smollett. Testy and discontented as he is, he writes with perspicuity. His observa- tions are generally sensible, and even his oddities are entertain- ing.' f KTi-.;:;' .-^ From the great knowledge of men and manners, ' a*i4 the ad-*" mirable display of the human passions our author exhibits in his other writings, it is natural to suppose he would have made a, most respectable figure in the departments of the Drama. He possessed a fertile invention and a fimd of humour. He was^ hap- py in delineatmg individual objects ; but he seems to have mis- taken his powers, when he attempted to group his characters for the business of the stage, and form a dramatic" series of events ; yet he i thought rather to have failed in his judgement than his genius. His Regicide, though censured by the critics as undramatic, in point of language, is animated, nervous, and pathetic ; but the language of itself could not procure it admis- sion on the stage, and the piece afforded scope for the satirical genius of Churchill, as appears from the following lines in his * apology to the Critical Reviewers .'' ' Whoever read the Regiddc, but swore ' The author wrote as mannc'er vcrote aefo: c; - ' Others for plots and MDdet- plots may call; ,11 Here's the right method havcoo plot at al!. ^ Who can so often in his cause ccgage, ' The tiny pathos of the Grecian flage, While horrors rife and tears tpontanceus flow, At tragic ha ! and no less tragic oh I To priife his nervous wcakncfsall agree, And then for fwcetncss, who so fweet ashe : 'I . Too big for utterance , when forrows swell, The too biij forrows flowing tears muft telf. But when thefe flowing tears muft cease to flow. ^ Why then the vcrfs nuift fp'"ak again, you know. If SmoUet did not excell as a dramatist, he gave a ptoof of great comic powers in The Reprisals, or the Tars of Old England. The characters of a Frenchman, an Irishman, % Scotphman, and 34! Life ojDr Smolteit. ' an English sailor, are as highly pourtrayed, and as finely distinii guished, as in any dramatic piece in the English language. "> As a Poety he is mentioned by a learned biographer with xhx greatest respect in the following terms. * His poetical compositions are so excellent in their kind, as to make us regret that they are not more numerous. Lively; humorous, witty, elegant, pathetic and sublime ; happy and suc- cessful in whatever the universatility of his genius prompted him to undertake ; his spirit, his sentiment, his language, are full of nature, enthusiasm, and simphcity, and while a love of poetry remains among us, must always please the reader of taste and sensibility. The poems on occasional subjects, are marked with Xhe different dispositions, which must have prevailed at different times of his life.' His poem, entitled Advice and Reproof though it evinces much political and literary prejudice, abounds with manly sentiment, poignant satire, and elegant language. His Love Elegy is elegantly plaintive, tender, and pathetic. His Tears of Scotland is entitled to praise. The Pathetic and the sublime are happily blended in this poem, and the following passage is exquisitely tender and beautiful. The pious mother dobm'd to death, Forfaken wanders o'er the heath ; The bleak wind whiftles round her head, Her helpless orphans cry for bread ; Bereft of fhelter, food, and friend, She views the fhadcs of night descend. And ftrctch'd beneath th' inclement skies. Weeps o'er her tender babes and dies. For some learned and judicious remarks on The Ode to In- dependence, see page 192, " General Observa,tion8." His Ode to Levzn Water discovers delicacy of sentiment joined to simplicity of taste ; the images are pastoral and pleasing, and the versification correct and harmonious. He celebrates his na- tive stream with all the elegant simplicity of an Arcadian shep- herd. This poem was sent as a present to a friend by an admirer of Smollett's productions, and this was the last publication our Author gave to the world. THE PLAYS AND P O E MS OS TOBIAS SMOLLET, M. D. LONDON: ^ Printed for T. KAY Strand, AND C. STUART Prince's Street Soho. i796 PREFACE. J/f/'HATEVER RehiBance I have to trouble the Public, ivith a detail of the mortijications I have fuffered, in my attempts to bring the etifuin^ performance on the Stage ; J, thini^ it a duty incumbent upon me^ to declare my rcafons for prefenting it in this extraordifiary manner ; and if the explana- tion fjall be found either tediotis or triflings I hope the candid reader will charge my impertinence upon thofe ivho drove me to the neceffity of maliiig fuch an ineffeSlual appeal. Beftdes^ I fatter myfelf that a fair reprefentation of the ufage I have met with^ will be as a beacon, to caution other inexperieiKed Authors againfl the inftnterity of managers y to which they might otherwife become egregious 'dupes ; andy cf-- ter a cajoling dream of good fortune , ivake in all the aggra- vation of difappointmcnt. Although' I claim no merit from having fnfhed a Tra- gedy at the age of eighteen ,- J cannot help thinking myfelf hl- titled to fome fhare of indulgeucey for the humility^ induflry, and patience y I have exerted during a period of ten years, in which this unfortunate production hath been eypofed to the cenfure of criticks of all degrees ; and / confequence of their feveral opinions, altered, and (I hope) amended, times with- out number. . , Had fome of thofe who were pleafed to call themfelves my friends, been at any pains to deferve the character, andtold me ingenuoifly what I had to expeB. in the capacity of an author, when 1 firfl profejfed mxflf of that venerable fraternity, I A JJmdd O . 5i PREFACE. Jlmildy in all probability y have fpdred tmfelf the incredible labour and chagrin I have Jince under gotie : buty as early ns the year I739> ffty play ivas taken into the protection of one ofthofe little feUoius ivho are fometimes called great men ; and like other orphans^ negleeled accordingly. Stung with refentmenty which I mijlookfor contempt y I re- solved to punijh this barbarous indifferencey and actually dif^ carded my patron ,- confoling myfelfivith the barren praife of a fenv ajjociatesy ivhoy in the mojl indefatigable manner y em- ployed their time and influenccy in colle^ing from all quarters cbfervations on my piece y ivhichy in confequence of thofe fug- ge/lionSyput on a new appearance almojl every dayy until my cccciftons called me out of the Kingdom. Soo7i after my returny I and my produBion were intro~ duced to a late patentee y of courteous memoryy nvhofrejl his Soul !) found means to amufe me a ivhole feafony and then de- clared it impracticable to bring it on ^till next year ; adviftng ine to make my applic.ation more early in the winter y that we might have time to concert fuch alterations y asfhould be thought neceffary for its fuccefsful appearance on the Stage. But I did notfnd my account in following this wholefome advice ; for^ to mcy he ivas al'ways lefs and lefs at leifure. Infhorty after fundry promifesy and number lefs evoftonsy in thecourfeofwhichy he praBifed upon me the whole art of procrajlinationy 1 de- manded his final anfivery with fuch obflinacy and warmthy that he could no longer refifi my importunity y and refufed my tragedy in plain terms. Not that he mentioned any material objeBions to the piece itfelf ; but feemcd to fear my interefl was not fttfficient tofupport it in the reprefentation ; afjir mingy that 110 dramatic compofttiony however perfcBy could fuccced with an Englifli audience by its own merit only ,- but niufl entirely depend upon afaBion raifed in its behalf. Incenfed at this un~ rxpeBed declaration, I reprctiched him bitterly y for having trifled PREFACE. iii irijied lu'ith me fo long ; dt Jfigiifi SCENE m. '. Dunbar, Eleonora. . Dunbar. .P, 111 it fuits A foldier's tongue, to plead the caufe of love,- In phrafe adapted to the tender theme : But truft me, beauteous wpnder ! when I fweaf Not the keen impulfe, a;nd impatient hope Of glory, glowing in the warrior's breaft, , With more awak'ned tranfport, fiU'd my foul When the fierce battle rag'd, than that I feel At thy approach ! ^My tongue has oft reveal'd The dictates of my heart ; but thou, averfei With cold difdain, haft ever chill'd my hopes, And fcorn'd my proffer'd vows ! * Eleonora. ' O youth, beware ! Let not the flow'ry fcenes of joy and peace. That faithlefs paffion to the view prefents, Enfnare thee into woe ! -Thou little know'ft What mifchiefs lurk in each deceitful charm j What griefs attend on love. - ' . Eleo- i6 The REGICIDE j Dunbar. Keen are the paftgs ' Of haplefs love, and paffion unapprov'd : But where conlenting wifhes meet, and vows, Reciprocally breath'd, confirm the tie, Joy rolls on joy, an inexhaufted ftream ! And virtue crowns the facred fcene with peace ! Eleonora. Illufibn all ! the phantoms of a mind That o'er its prefent fate repining, courts The vain refource of fancy's airy dreams. War is thy province. War be thy purfuit.-^ DundaR. ! thou wduldft tell me, I am favage all Too much eftrang'd to the foft arts of life. To warm thy breafi: ! Yes, war has been my fchool*^*** War's rough fincerity, unflcill'd in modes Of peaceful commerce foften'd not the lefs To pious truth, humanity and love. Eleonora. Yes : I were envious to refufe npplaufe. When ev'ry mouth is open'd iri thy praife. 1 were ungrateful not to yield thee more, Diftinguifh'd by thy choice ; and though my heart Denies thee love, thy virtues have ac Stuart, Eleonora* Stuart. |The mighty fchemes of empire, foar too high For your diftinilion, daughter. Simple woman Is weak in intellecSt, as well as frame. And judges often from the partial voice That foothts her wifh.es moft. {Difcover'ing himfelf, Eleonora. Ha, frantic youth ! What guilty purpofe leads thy daring fteps To this forbidden place ? Art thou not come. Beneath that facred veit, the more to brave Th' avenging hand of Heav'n ? Stuart. No that 1 tread The paths of danger, where each bofom pants With keen revenge againft me, fpeaks aloud The fervour of my love My love mifplac'd ! Elfe, would'ft thou not receive the genVous proof With anger and difdain. Eleonora. Have I not caufe To drive thfee from my heart ? Haft thou not chac'd! All faith, and truth, and loyalty from thine ? Say, haft thou not confpir'd againft thy Prince ? A prince ! who cherifh'd thee with parent zeal. With friendfhip honour'd thee, and ev'ry day With bounteous favour crown'd thy rifing wifli ! C 2 Stuart* 46 The REGICIDE: Stuart. Curfe on his arts ! ^his aim was to enflavd Th' afpiring foul, to ftifle and reprefs Th' emerging didlates of my native right. To efface the glowing images within, Awak'd by glory, and retain by fraud The fceptre he ufurps ! Eleonora. Infidious chafge As feeble as unjuft ! for, clear as day In courfe. dire Stuart. That thou feeft me here Unarm'd, alone, from Augns might obtain A fair interpretation Stuart's love Pleads not in myflic terms ; nor are my vows To Eleonora, cancell'd o> unknown r- Vows by thyfelf indulg'd, e'er envy yet. Or folly had induc'd thee, to embrace The fortunes of our foe. ^Thy foul reproach My foul retorts on thee ! and mark, proud Lord, Revenge will have its turn ! Angus. |ia ! muft I bear A beardlefs traitor's infults ? 'tis not mine To wage a.fruitlefs war of words with thee, Vain-glorious ftripling. While thine aims were juft, A TRAGEDY. 25 1 fcal'd thy title to my daughter's love ; But now, begrim'd with treafon, as thou art, By Heav'n ! not diadems and thrones fhall bribe ^y approbation ! but the King himfelf Sli^ll judge thy conduct. Guards S C E N E' VIII. Enter Ele^nora, ^vho kneels. O ! let me thus Implore compaffion, at a parent's knees, "VVho ne'er refus'd Angus, Convey him hence. [Stuart is led of, Arife - Hemember, Eleonora, from what Iburce t ' Thine origin is drawn. ^Thy mother's, foul In purity excell'd the fnowy fleece That cloaths our northern hills ! her youthful charms. Her artlefs blufh, her look feverely fweet. Her dignity of mien and fmiles of love Sui-vive in thee Let me behold thee too Her honour's heirefs - l_Exit Angus, J?CEN IX, JIleonora. Yes ! will adhere To this ill-omen'd honour ! facrifice Life's promis'd joys to its auftere decree ; And vindicate the glories of my race. At the fad price of peace ! If Athol's arms D (Which 26 The REGICIDE: (Which heav*n avert !) to treafon add fuccefs. My father's death will join his Sov'reign's fall ! And if the caufe of royalty prevail, Each languid hope with Stuart muft expire !-i- From thought to thought, perplex'd, in vain I ftray. To pining anguifh doom'd, and fell difmay ! END OF THE FIRST ACTv A TRAGEDY. af A C T II. S G E N E I. Angus, Dukbar. Dui^BAR. XJ Y Heav'n it glads me, that my fword fhall find An ample field to day. ^The King arrous'd, Chafes like a lion in the toils betra/d. Angus. I mark'd his indignation, as it rofe At Athol's proud reply, from calm concern. To anxious tumult, menacing difdain. And overboiling wrath. But fay, my friend. How move the rebels ? Are their ranks difpos'd By military fkill ? Or come they on In undiftinguilh'd crouds ? Dunbar. In concourfe rude They fwarm undifciplin'd all arm'd alike With fVvord and target. On their firft allault (Fearlefs indeed and' headlong !) all their hopes Of conqueft muft depend. If we, unbroke, Suftain their onfet ; little fkill'd in war. To wheel, to rally and renew the charge, Confufion, havock and difmay will feize Th' aftonifh'd rout.- Angus. "What number* twring th^y on ? D 2 DUK^ 28 Thf REGICIDE: ^ DUKBAR. Ten thoufand, as I guefs. Angus. Ours fcarcc amount To half the number : Yet, with thofe, we mean. To hazard an encounter. ^Thou, mean while, Shalt viflt ev'ry paflage, found th' alarm, And man the city walls. Here I attend The King and lo ! he ccSmes ^Exit Dunbar* S C E N E II. King, Angus. King. ^The commonweal Has been confulted. ^Tendemefs and zeal Became the parent. ^fhofe have nought avail'd. Now, let corredtion fpeak the King incens'd ! Angus. Not without caufe, my Liege, fhall dread rebuke Attend your royal wrath. What reign lliall 'fcape Rebellion's curfe, when your paternal fway Has hatch'd the baneful peft ? King. Let Heav'n decide Between me and my foes. ^That I would fpare The guiltlefs blood which muft our quarrel dye. No other proof requires, than my advance To reconcilement oppoilte jierhaps To my own dignity. But I will rife In A TRAGEDY. 29 In vengtance mighty ! and difpcl the clouds That have bedimm'd my ftate. Angus. The odds are gret Between the numbers : but our caufe is juft : Our foldiers regularly train'd to war, And not a breaft among us entertains A doubt of viiHiory. KlNG- O valiant Thane f Experienced oft, and ever trufty found I Thy penetrating eye, and adlive zeal Firft brought this foul confpiracy to light j ' And now thy faithful vaflals, firft appear In arms for my defence ! ^Thy recompencc My love ihall ftudy. Angus. Blotted be my name From honour's records, when I ftand aloof, Regardlefs of the danger that (urrounds The fortunes of my prince ! King. I know thee well- Mean time our care muft be, to obviate With circumfpelion and preventive Ikill, Their numbers. In unequal conflict joins Th' unweildy fpear that loads the borderer. With the broad targe and expeditious fword : "The loyal band that from the kills of Lorn, Arriv'd, Ihall in our front advance, and ftand With targe to targe, and blade to blade oppos'd j The JO The REGICIDE: The fpear^ extended fortti the fecond line. And our light archers hovef to and fro, To, gall their flanks. ^Whatever accident In battle fhall befal, thy vigilance Win iremedy. M}felf will here remain To guard the town, and with a fmall referve, Jf need requires, thine exigence fupply. Angus. "Will joy the glorious talk I undertake ^ {Epteunt, SCENE III. Dunbar^ IIamsay. K.AMSAY. Ttey halt, and occupy the narrow pafs Form'd by the river and th'impending hill ; "With purpofe (as I deem) to charge our hoft On the fmall plain that fkirts thjp town. Dunbar. 'Tis well. Thus hemmed, their lifelefs nurtiberis will involve Themfelves in tumult, to our arms fecure An eafy con quell:, and retard their flight. To Angus hie thee>fl:raight with this advice. My talk perform'd, I v.'ait the King's command In Oiis appointed place. ^ \xit Ramfay. SCENE IV. SxEoNOKA, Dunbar. Eleonora, I fought thee, youth. Ere yet this dreadful criiis fhall decide The A TRAGEDY, 31^ The public fate, let us to private woe Devote one moment ! Tell me, brave Dunbar, Wilt thou not, from the hyrry of the day, One moment fnatch to hear me, and condole The anguiih of my foul ? PUJTBAR. O Eleonora I Sooner fliall the parch'd traveller refufe The gelid fountain, than my raptur'd foul The mufic of thy tongue ! What grief profaiK? Thy fpotlefs bofom ? happy ! far above The pride of conquerors, were I to eafe Thy forrow's pangs ! t , Eleonora, Thy gen'rous heart likmei Can brook the enterprize n . - * ' i DUN3AR. O ! talk my iove; That I more fwlft than gjiles that fweep the plain. May fly to thy relief! -. ^f*l:_, > ,; ... .JU . Ej;i, to execute A deed fo fatal tp its own repofe ! Eleonora. I fought not ^intnefs ye celeftial powers ! To aggravate thy pain. My mind, perplex'd, p.evolv'd in lilent woe', nor could unload Her burden to another. Thou alone. Hail; won my fair opinion and my truft ; And to thy word indebted, honour claims Th' engagement all her own. Dunbar. Yet, with referve "Was that impawn'd : my loyalty and love "Were facred ev'n from that : nor can I loofe His chains without an injury to both ! Eleo- ^A TRAGEDY. 33 Eleonora. Cold unafpiring is the love that dwells ^ With tim'rous caution; and the breaft untouch'd By glory's godlike fervour, that retains The fcruples of difcretion. Let the winds That have difpers'd thy prorhife, fnatch thy vows 1 Dunbar. Shall I, thro' i^th enthufiafm, wed Eternal anguifli ? -Shall I burft afunder The bonds of awfiil juftice, to preferve The ferpent that has poifon'd all my peace ! No, Eleonora ! blafted be Eleonora. Take heed ! Nor by an oath precipitate, involve Thy fate beyond refource : For know, Dunbar, The love of Stuart, with his guilt abjur'd. This mom, my folemn vow to heav'ft appeai'd^ Hath fever'd us for ever. Dunbar. Then, I'm fliU ! ' Still as the gentle calm, when the hufh'd wave No longei" foams before the rapid ftorm ! Let the young traitor perilh, and his name In dark oblivion rot. Eleonora. Shall I, alas ! Supinely favage, from my ears exclude The cries of youthful woe ? of woe intaiM By tne too ! If my heart denies him love, W pity> fure, may flow ! Has he not griefs E That K The REGICIDE: That wake cv'n thy compaflion ? Say, Dunbar,- Unmov'd could'ft thoil fiirvey t^' unhappy youth' Wliom but this' morn beheld m pride of hope And pow'r magnificent ! ftretch'd on the ground Of a a damp dungeon, groaning with defpair ! With not one friend his forrows to dividey And chear his lone diftrefs ? DunbXr. Can I rdfiflt So faif a motive, and fo fweet a tongue ! When thy foft heart with kind compaflion glows,' Shall I the tender fentimeht reprefs ? - No ! let me rather hail the focial pang ; And ev'ry felfifh appetite fubdu'd, Indulge a flafne {o gen'rous and humane ! Away with each emotion that fuggefts A rival favour'd and a traitor freed -, My love unbounded reigns, and fcorns to own Reflexion's narrow limits i* Yes my fair, This hoitr he ihall be free. {Exit Dunbuj** S C E N E V. Eleonora. O wond'rous power Of lote beneficent ! O gen'rous youth ! What recompenfe, thus bankrupt as I am ! Shall fpeak my grateful foul I A poor return Gold friendihip renders to the fervid hope Of fond defire ! and my invidious fate Allows no more. But let me not bewail. With avarice of grief, my private woe , When p^e with fear, and harafs'd with alalm, A TRAGEDY. . ^ Mf royal miftrefs, flill benign to me, jrhe zealous tender of my duty claims. \Extt. SCENE VL jy'ifcovers StU41TIT pi chains, Stuart. Curfe on my headftrong paflion j I have earn'd The wages of my folly ! Is it thus My faithlefs deftiny requites my hope ! SCENE YJI. StUASLT, DujIBAit. Stuart. Ha ! com'ft thou to infult my chains ? 'Twas w^ My unpropitious Daemon gave me up To your refentment, tamely. - DUNEAR. To exuit Ev'n o'er an enemy opprefs'd, and heap Afflidlion on th' afflicted, is the mark And the mean triumph of a daftard foul.- Tis what Dunbar difdains. ^Perhaps, I come To pity, pot rejoice at Stuart's fate. Stuart. To pity 1^ ^Torture ! am I fall'n fo low I Ha ! recreant ! move thy pity 1 hell untie Thefe flavifh manacles, that I may fcourge This wretched arrogant ! E a Dunbar, 36 The REGICIDE: Dunbar. True courage fcorns To vent her prowefs in a ftorm of words : And to the valiant, actions fpeak alone : Then let my deeds approve me. I am come To give thee inftant freedom. Stuart. Mean'ft thou death I. I fliall be free then. An apt minifter Th' Ufurper has ordain'd to perpetrate His f^cret murders.- Dunbar. Why wilt thou beljre Thy own intelligence ? Thou know' ft, my fword Was ne'er accuftom'd to the bravo's ftah ; Nor the defigns of him fo falfely ftil'd Ufurper, ever fuUy'd with a ftain Of cruelty or guile. My purpofe is, ' To knock thy fetters off, conduift thee fafe Without the city-confines, and reftore thee To liberty and AlIhoL--- Stuart. Fawning coward ! Thou thou reftoi-e me ? ^thou unbind my chains K Impoffible ! ^Thy fears that I may Ucape, Like vultures gnaw thee ! Dunbar.' When the battle joins, '!^hou fhalt be anfwer'd. STUARt. A TRAGEDY*:! ^ JQr Stuart,' . When the battle joins ! Away, diflembler !-7-Sooner would'ft thou beard The lion in his rage, than fairly pieet My valour on the plain ! Dunbar. Ha ! who art thou, That I fhould dread thy tlireats ? By heaven's hig^ throne ! I'll meet thee in a defart, to thy teeth Proclaim thy treachery, and with my fword Explore thy faithlefs heart ! Meanwhile jny fteps Shall guide thee to the field. [^Stuart is unckamed^ and prefented 'with a fword. Stuart. ; No ! ^Lightning blaft mc, " If I become thy debtor, proud Dunbar i Thy naufeous benefits fliall not enflave My freeborn will. Here, captive as I am. Thy lavifh'd obligation {hall not buy i^.. ^??1(fe\=?l;v/A My friendlhip ! No ! nor ftifle my re^^enge ! Dunbar. Alike unpleafant would it be to me. To court thy love or deprecate thy hate : What I have proffer'd, other motives urg'd. The gift is Eleonora's. Stua,rt. Sacred powers ! Let me not underftand thee ! ^Thou haft rous'd . My foul's full fury ! ^In the blood that warms Xhine heart, perfidious, I will flake mine ii*e ?' 4:' ^- DuN- Y-i ;&504 38 The REGICIDE; Dunbar. In all my condul, infolent of heart ! What liaft thou mark'd fo abjedl: and fo meaij, That thy foul tongue its licence thus avows ? To boundlefs paffion fubje6l as thyfelf, "Wild tumult oft my reafon overwhelms ! Then tempt me not too far, left blindfold wrath Tranfport my foul, and headlong ruin crulh Thy pride ev'n here ! \ '. i .. - . . Stuart, In this accurfed place Let me be iliackled rivetted with bolts, 'Till the ruft gnaw my carcafc to the bone. If. my heart throbs not for the combat, here !- Ev'n here, where thou art. Lord ! Ha ! do'ft thou fhakc^ By heav'n, thy quiv'ring lip and haggard look Confefs pale terror and amaze ! r DUNBAR.- Away ' Away, lewd railer !- not thy lland'rous tliroat So fruitful of inveOiyes, fhall provoke me ' To wreak unworthy vengeance on thee, fafe In thy capitivity : But foon as war Shall clofe th' encountring hoft. 111 find thee out-^ Affert my claim to Eleonora's love. And tell thee, -whzt thou art. Stuart. I bum I rage My fell revenge confumes me I But no more Thou fhalt not 'fcape me Goaded by my wrongs, I'll hunt thee thro' the various fcenes of death 'r Thou {halt he found ! DUNB4|^ A TRACtDY. C39 DONfiAR. I triumph in that hope. , - . ..-i.;^.^^ ... .,...^.... . ., .Xfiff'vnt: scene! Vm. changes'. n: . : . 3*;-* King, Queen, aite/idediiy;,^ 'yoc^v '4.'' EiNd, Cburagious Apgtis fhall not be o'erpowr'd^ Myfelf will bring him aid. " T Queen. ^>sr5a:>,. Alas ! my Prince f -T ' (^ King.. "What means the gentle part'ner of my heart ? i)ifmifs thy fears. ^This day. will diffipate The caufe of thy difmay. Ev'n now, I gd To pKick the wreath of vi^ory, and lay Frefh laurels iti thy lap. Queen. Ah ! why let in A train of harpy forrows to my breaft !-^V_ ^ ^ij . -Ah ! why in your own precious life, expole Xour kingdom's fafety, and your confort's peace I Let me reftraih you from the field to day. There is no fame no glory to be won Froni a revolter's brow. - Kin'g. ^ The public-weal Commands to arm Difhonour i;aint my nans. When I rejedl the call } , Qt^een;, 40 The REGICIDE: Queen. i -- lU-omen'd call ! That like the raven's croak, invades my quiet ! O ! would to heaven our minutes fmoothly roll'd In humble folitude, with meek-eyc'd peace I Remote from royalty, and all the cares That brood around the throne ! King. No, let lis fcorri Unfeeling eafe, and private blifs forego. When, public mifery implores our aid. What dignity of tranfport feels the Prince, ; Who, from the fangs of fierce oppreffive power, A people refcues ? Queen. What a dreadful hofl Of dangers circle him ! King. Difeafe confers The (lamp of value upon health ; and glory . Is the fair child of peril. -Thou thyfelf My conduct wilt applaud, foon as thy mind Its native calm regains, and reafon fways Unchecked by fear. Secure till my return Remain within, and ev'ry thought indulge Foreboding my fuccefs. Queen. Adieu Adieu 1 Heav'n crown your valour with a happy wreath. lExit ^teefu King A TRAGEDY. 4; King, to an Attendant. ^wlft, hie thee to Dunbar, and bid hini lead ^^he chofen citizens i Enter Ramsay, , S C E N E 1:5^. JCi>fG, attended^ Ramsay, Ramsay. O fatal chance ! The traitor' Grime, with a felefted band, (While Angus, prefs'd on every fide, fuftains The' unequal fight) a fecret path purfii'd Around the hills, and pouring all at once, Surpriz'd the eaftern gate ! -the citizens "yVith confi:ernation finote, before his arnis In rout diforder'd fly ! King. Ha ! then the wheel Of fate, fuU circle, rolls to crufh me down ! Nor leaves one paufe for condu<5l ! Yet I'll bear My fortunes like a King Hafbe and coUedl The fcatter'd parties Let us not fubmit 'Ere yet fubdu'd ^To anus, {Drawing Ramsat. Alas my Prince \ The Convent is befet ^Hark ! while we fpeak The gates are burft Behold F Ki\(^ 42 The REGICIDE: - King. We muft prevent The pangs of Hng'ring mifery, and fall With honour, as we lived S C E N E X. ^ King, amended, Ramsay. Grime, with folloiuers hurjiing in. King. What bold contempt Of Majefty, thus rudely dares intrude Into my private; fceiies \ Grime. Ttxe hour is fled, That faw thy wonton tyranny impofe The galling yoke Yes, I am come to wreft Tlie prolHtuted fceptre from thy hand, And drag thee fetter'd to the royal throne Of Walter, whom I ferve. Kino. Outragious wretch \ Grown old in treachery ! whofe foul untam'd, No mercy foftens, and no laws reftrain ! Thy life thrice forfeited, my pity thrice Trom juftice hath redeem'd ; yet art thou found Still turbulent a rugged rebel ftill, Unaw'd, and unreclaim'd ! Grime. i ' That I yet breathe This ambient air, and tread this earth at will. A TRAGEDY; -T 4? Not to thy mercy but thy dread I owe.-** Wrong'd as I was my old poiTeffions reft By thy rapacious poAyer, my limbs enchain'd Within a loathfome dungeon, and my name Thy loud reproach thro' all the groaning land ; li^hon durft not flied my blood ! the jpurple ftream Had fweird-^a tijde of vengeance ! and o'erwhelm'd The proud oppreflbr. King. Traitor to thy Prince, And foe fierverfe to truth ! how full thy crimes^ Thy doom how juft my pardon how humane. Thy cqnfcious malice knows but_ let me not Degrade my name, and vindicate to thee The juftice of my reign. Grime. Vain were th' attempt With artifice of words, to foothe my rage, More deaf to mercy, than the famifh'd wolf That tears the bleeting kid ! My ftarv'd revenge Thy blood alone can fatiate ! Yield ye then : Dr link beneath mine arm; KlNG^ Heav'n fhall not fee , A deed fo abjeft vilify my name- While yet I wield this fword, and the warm blood Still ftreams within my veins j my courage foars Superior to a ruffian's threats.- F i GjAiHH* 44 The REGICIDE: Grime. Fall on. And hew them piece-meal. [^King, Ramfayy and Attendants drive (A Grime and his followers ; bttt ore nfter'^ it/ards overpQivtred and difarined. Grime. Wilt thou yet maintain Thy dignity of words ? ^Where are thy flaves. Thy fubje6ls, guards and thimder of thy throne, Reduc'd ufurper ? Guard thefe captives hence. [_Exeunt King, Ram/ay, ^c, guarded,- SCENE X^. Enter a Soldier to Gruvte. Soldier. A trbop of horfemch have poiiefled the gate By which we gain'd the city*- ^ Grime. Blaft them hell ! We muft retreat another way, and leave Our aim unfinifh'd ! Our viftorious fwords At leaft fliall guard tlie treafure they have won-. When the fierce parent-lion bites our chain His whelps forlorn, an eafy prey remain. END OF THE SECOND ACT' A TRAGEDY.K1 1^; w ACT III. S C E N E I. Q^EEN, ^LEONORA, CaPTAIN. ' Queen. HAT from the battlements haft thou defcr/^? Captain. Nothing diftinft, my Queen Involv'd in clouds Impervious to the view, the battle lotig Continu'd doubtful, 'midft the mingling founds Of trumpets, neighing fteeds, tumultuous fhouts Of fierce aflailants, doleful cries of death. And clatt'ring armout ; 'till at length, the noife In diftant murmurs dy'd. O'er all the plain. Now a dread ftillnefs reigns ! Queen. Then all is loft ! Why paufes rum, and fufpends the ftroke ! Is it to lengthen out affliction's term. And feed produdlive woe ! Where (hall the groarfe Of Innocence deferted find redrefs ! Shall I exclaim to heav'n ? Already heav'n Its pity and protection has withdrawn ! Earth yield me refuge then ! give me to lie "Within thy chearlefs bofom ! there, put off Th' uneafy robe of being ! there, lay down The load of my diftref^ ! 4^ The REGICIDE: Eleonora. Alas ! my Queen, What confolation can the wretched bring ! How fhall I from my own defpair, colle*^:, Afluafive balm. ? ^Within my lonely breaft: Mute forrow and defpondence loug have dwelt ! And while my Sire, perhaps, this inftant, bleeds. The dim, exhaufted fountains of my grief, Can fcarce aiSbrd a tear ! (!^EEN. A O Lilxury Of mutual ill ! ^Let us enjoy the feaft I To groan re-echo groan, in concert raifc Our lamentation j and when forrow fwells Too big for utterance , the filent ftreams Shall flow in common ! ^When the ftreams Forbear to flow, the voice again fliall wail ! O my 16ft Lord ! O fave him fave him powers I Eleonora. Is there no gentle remedy, to foothc The foul's diforder ; lull the jarring thoughts, And wifh fail- images amufe the mind ? - Come fmiling hope-^-nlivine illufion ! come In all thy pride of triumph o'er the pangs Of mifery and pain ! Queen. Low low indeed. Have our misfortunes plung'd us ; v/hen no gleam , Of wand'ring hope, how vain foe'er or falfe. Our invocation flatters ! ^When- O when Will death deliver me ! ^Shall i nof reft^ Within A tragedy; k^ Within the peaceful tomb, where I may fleep In calm oblivion, and forget the wrecks Of ftormy life I No founds difturb tlie grave, Of murder'd hufbands ! H3r the difmal fcneam Of infants perilling !^ Ha ! whither leads Imagination ! JMuft ye perifh then. Ye tender bloflbms ! Muft the lofty oak That gave you life, and {helter'd you from harm^i Yield to the traitor's axe ! O agony Of fond diftraaion 1 Eleonora. Ha ! 43ehold where comes The warlike Ton of March ! ^What, if he brings The news of victory ! Queen. My foul alarm'd, "With e^emef^ and terror waits her doom ! * ' S C E N E II. Queen, Eleonora, Dunbar. Queen. 5ay, youth, how fares the King ! p Dunbar. Fair Princeis, Kail ! To you my duty and my fpeed were bent - Your royal confort triumphs. Queen. ^ Lives he then ! Lives he, delivcr'd from the fatal fnares Which had enclos'd him ! P.UN- ^ The REGICIDE: Dunbar. To their hills repell'd, The vanquifh'd rebels curfe his conqu'ring arm- He bade me fly before him to the Queen ; With the glad tidings cheer her drooping foul i And bear his kindert wiflies to the fhrinc Himfelf will foon adore. Qu-EEN. Will he then come And wipe the tear of forrow from my cheek ! ^ Ah, no ! ^thy pity flatters me in vain ! Dunbar. Let me not dally with my Queen's diftrefs. What were it, but to lift incumbent woe. That it might fall more grievous.- By the faith Of my allegiance, hither fpeeds the King, By love attended, and by conqueft crown'd. Queen. O welcome meflenger f How fweetly founds Thy prflude ! ^Thus, the warbler of the morn, To the fick wretch who moan'd the tedious night. Brings balmy flumber, eafe and hope and health ! O wondrous deiliny ! Eleonora. Thus, on my Queen May fortune ever fmile May blifs to blifs Succeed, a tranquil fcene ! Say, noble youth. Returns my Sire in fafety from the field ? - DUNV ^A TRAGEDY. *49 Dunbar. Safe as thy fondefl: filial wilh can form.-^^-^ In war's variety, mine eyes have {een Variety of valour and of Ikill : But fuch united excellence of both Such art to baffte and amufe the foe ; Such intrepidity to execute Repeated efforts, ^never, fave in him My obfervation trac'd ! ^Our Monarch's a^ My feeble praife would fully and profane. Eleonora. Thy words like genial fhow'rs to the parch'd earth, ' Refrefh my languid foul ! Queen. The trumpet fwells ! My conquerpr approaches ! ^Let me fly With extafy of love into his arms ! He comes ! ^the viilor com,es ! SCENE III. King, Queen, Eleonora, Dun^r., King, embracing the ^ieen. jVIy better part ! My foul's chief refidence ! My love ! my Queen l^ Thou haft been tender overmuch, and moum'd Ev'n too profufely ! Queen. Celebrate this hour Ye fongs of Angels ' and ye fons of earth, ^ G . Keep 5 The REGICIDE: Keep feftival ! ^My Monarch is retum'd ? I fold him in thefe arms ! ^I hear his voice His love foft-chiding ' King. O yc powers benign f What words can fpeak the rapture of my foul ! Coine to my breaft, where, cherifh'd by my love. Thy fair idea rooted, bloflbms forth And twines around my heart ! Queen. Myfterious fate ! My wiflies are compleat 1 Yet, I muft alk A thoufand things, impertinently fond ! How did you 'fcape ? What Angel's hand, my King, Preferr'd you from defbrudtion ? King. Heav'n, indeed, Efpotis'd my caufe, and fent to my relief The fon of March, who, with a chofen few, Deliver'd me from Grime : thence to the field We fpeeded, and accomplilh'd what the fword Of Angus had well nigh atchiev'd before. Queen, to Dunbar. How fhaU acknowledgment enough reward Thy worth unparallel'd ? King. Now, by my throne I Not my own ifluc fhaU engrofs me, more Than thou, heroic youth ! ^Th* infulting foe. In fpite of frefh fupplies, witli flaughter driven To the ftcep hills that bound the pV in^ have fent An A TRAGEDY. <^i An Herald, in their turn, to fue for peace. An audience have I promis'd. Ere the hour Arrives, I will retire, and in the bath Refreih my weary'd limbs. [^Exeunt Kingi ^eeny attendants] S C E N E IV. Dunbar, Eleonora. . ^ ELeonora. Renown, to day Has lavifh'd all her honours on thy head. Dunbar. What boots it, that my fortune decks me thus With unfubftantial plume? ; when my heart groans Beneath the gay caparifon, and love With unrequited paflion wounds my foul ! Eleonora. Is unpropitious love unknown to me ? To me for ever doom'd (alas !) to nurfe The flow confuming fire. Dunbar. Heav'ns ! what are all The boafted (Charms, that with- fuch wond'rous power Attach thee to my rival ? ^Far from me Be the vain arrogance of pride, to vaunt Excelling talents ; yet I fain would learn. On what admir'd accomplilliment of Stuart, Thy preference is fixd. Eleonora. Alas i Dunbar, G2 My SZ TiiE REGICIDE: My judgment, weak zmd erring as it is, Too well difcerns on whom I Ihbuld beftow My love and my efteem : But truft me, youth. Thou little know'ft how hard it is to Avean The niind from darling habits long indulg'd ! I know that Stuart finks into reproach : Immers'd in guilt, and, rnore than once, fubdu'd By thy fuperior merit and fuccefs : Yet even this Stuart, for I would not wrong Thine expectation, flill retains a part Of my compafllon ^njy, I fear, my love ! Would'ft thou, diftinguifh'd by th' applaufc of kings, Difgrace thy qualities, and brook the prize Of a divided heart ? Dunbar. No ' ^witnefs heav'n I love not on fuch terms I ^Am I then doom'd, Unfeeling maid ! for ever, to deplore Thy unabating rigour ! ^The rude flint Yields to th' incelTant drop ; but Elebnora, Inflexibly fevere, unchang'd remains Unmov'd by my complaint ! Eleonora. My father comes ! Let me, with pious ravifliment, embrace His martial knees, and blels the guardian power That fcreen'd him in the battle ! S C E N ? r 1 ' A TRAGEDY, y| S C E N E V. Angus, Dunbar, Eleonora, Angus. Rife my child, Thou haft been always dutiful, and mild As the fort breeze that fans the fummer-cve ! Such innocence endearing, gently ftolc Into my youthful hpfom, and awak'd Loves tender languifhment, when to my view Thy' mother firft difplay'ci her virgin bloom ! J . .- . {^urnifig to Dunhat\ Come to my arms Dunbar ! 'to Ihield from death A parent, is the venerable adt Of the moft pious duty.^r Thus adopted, Henceforward be my fon ! the rebel chiefs Secure in my faferCondu S C E N E VI. Angus, Eleonora. Angus. Eleonora, Behold th' undaunted youth, -vvho ftept between The ftroke of fate and me. O'erpow'd, unhors'd, - And by the foe furrounded, I had funk, A viftim to barbarity enrag'd j # If brave Dunbar, to his own peril blind. Had not that inftant, to my refcue fprung ! Nay, when that youthful traitor by whofe arm Jleleas'd, I know not, headlong rufli'd againft me ; My 54 The REGICIDE : My vigilant deliverer, oppos'd The fierce aggreflbr, wlxofe afpiring creft Soon proftrate fell. Eleonora. Ha! fell! ^Is Stuart flain ? ! fpeak my father.- Angus. - Wherefore this alarm i Let me not find thy bofom entertain A fentiment imworthy of thy name I The gen'rous viclor gave him back his life i And cry'd aloud, " This facrifice I make ** For Elconora's love." Eleonora. O matchlcfs youth ! His virtues conquer'd my cfteem, before : But now my grateful fentiment inflames Ev'n to a fifler's zeal ! . Angus. ^ With rigid power 1 would not bridle thy reluftant thought : Yet, let me, with parental <:are, command The paffion of Dunbar. Ei.EONORA. A fairer garb His title could not wear : But when I think "VWiat rocks in fecret lie what tempefts rife On love's deceitful voyage ; my timid foid Recoils afiiighted, and wirh horror fliuns Th' inviting calm I- ANCys, A TRAGEDY. 55 Angus. Retire, my child, and weigh The difPrent claims. Here, glory, love, and truth Implore thy fmiles : there, vice with brutal rage Would force thee to his wifhes. But too long I tarry in this place. I muft attend My fov'reign in his interview with Athol. \_Exeunt. SCENE VII. Changes to another apartimnt. Athol, Grimb. Athol. What we to fortune ow'd, our arms have paid : But let us now, the changeling pow'r renounce- Unhappy thofe, who hazard their defigns On her without referve ! Grime. Our plan purfu'd A purpofe more afliir'd : ^With conqueft crown'd, Our aim indeed, a fairer wreath had worn ; But that deny'd, on terms of darker hue Our fwords fhall force fuccefs !-; Athol. Til' approaching fcenc Demands our utmoft art ! not with tame fighs To bend before his throne, and fi^pplicate His clemency, like flaves ; nor to provoke With pride of fpeech, his anger half appeas'd : But with fubmiffion mingle (as we fpeak) A confcious dignity of loul, prepar'd For all events. Grime. 5 May my fhrunk finew never more unflieath My wdl-try'd dagger ; nor my hungry hate Enjoy the fav'ry fleam of hoftile gore ' Athol. How my fir'd foul anticipates the joy ! I fee me feated in the regal chair, I'lnthron'd by Grime, the partner of my power ! But this important enterpri7c demands More fecret conference. ^llie fword of Stuart Will much avail : but his unpraclic'd youth To doubts and fcniples fubjeft, hitherto Declines our laft rcfolvc. " Grime. . It (hall be mine. To roufe his paflion to the pitch reqtrir'd. But A TRAGEDY. ;f^7 But foft ! who comes ? ^Ten, thoufand curfes loatl Th' ambitious ftripling ! Enter DuNBAR. By the King's command, I come to guide you to the throne. Athol. Tis well. lExetmt. SCENE VIII. Difcovsrs the Kmcfeatcd, Angus, Attendanisi Enter Athol, Grime, introduced by Dunbar. King. It is not well it is not well we meet On terms like thefe ! I fliould have found in Athol A trufty counfellor and fteady friend : And better would it fuit thy rev'rend age, Thy Nation, quality, and kindred blood. To hufh ill-judging clamour, and cement Divided factions to my throne, again. Than thus embroil the ftate. - Athol. My pr^fent aim Is to repair, not widen more, the breach JL hat difcord made between us : this, my liege, Not harfh reproaches, or fevere rebuke Will e'er efFe(Shiate : ^No ^let us rather. On terms which equally become us both. Our int'refts re-unite. King. Hah ! ^reunite ! By heav'n, thy proud demeanor more befits A fov'reign than a fubjecl ! Re-unite i H How 5 8 ' The REGICIDE: How durft^thou fever from thy faith, old lord ! And with an helmet load that hoary head To wage rebellious war ! Athdl. Tlic fword of Athol Was never drawn but to rediefs the \^Tong3 His country fufter'd. King. , Dar'ft thou to my face. Impeach my conduft, baffled as thou art, Ungrateful traitor ? ^Is it thus, thy guilt My clemency iinplores ? Athol. Not yet fo low- Has fate reduc'd us, that we need to crawl Beneath your footftool : In our camp remain- Ten thoufand vig'rous mountaineei-s, who long Their honours to retrieve. N KiNG; ri/J/ig ka/Ii/)\ Swift, hie thee to them, And lead thy fugitive adherents back ! Awa'y. ^Now, by the mighty foul of Bruce ! Thou fhalt be met. And if thy favage c'ans Abide us in the plain, we foon will tread Rebellion into duft. ^Why move ye not ? Conduft theitt to their camp.-^ ' Athol. Forgive, my Prince, n^i( on my own integrity of lieart Too far prefuming, I have gall'd the Vv'ound Too much ihflam'd already. Not ^vlth. you, l;ut with johr meafures' ill-^ldvis'd, Iwarr'd : Vour A TRAGEDY. y^ Your facred perfou, family and throne My purpofe ftill rever'd. EllNG. O wretclied plea. To which thy blafted guilt muft have recourfe \ Had thy defign been laudable, thy tongue With honeft freedom boldjy fhQuld have fpoke Thy difcontcnt; Ye live not in a reign Where truth, by arbitrary pov^r deprefs'd, Dpres not maintain her ftate. I charge thee, fay "What lawlefs meafures h^ my pow'r purfu'd ? Athol. I come, to' mitigate your royal >,vrath With forrow and fubmiffion j not to fum The motives which qpmpell'd me to the field. ^ King. i found your miferable ftate reduc'd To ruin and defpair : Your cities di'ench'd in mutual daughter, defolate your plains : All order banifh'd, and all arts decay'd : * No induftry, fave what with hands impure Diftrefs'd the commonwealth : No laws in force, To fcreen the poor and check the guilty great ; While fqualid famine join'd her ftfter fiend Devouring peftilence, to curfe the fcene I I came, 1 toil'd, ^retorm'd, redrefs'd the whole : And lo, my recompenle ! But I relapfe. What k your fuit ? AtHOL. We fue (my liege) for peace. King. Say, that my' lenity flionld grant your prayer-, tj % How 6et the proud tyrant yield his haughty foul : , And all his offspring Aveli the fanguine flream. Let Angus perifh too. Stuart. O wond'rcus plan Of unreflrain'd barbairity ! ^It fuits The hortors of my bofom 1 Ail ! ^'vVhat all ? In 64 The REGICIDE : In flaughter'd heaps. ^The progeny and fire ! To fluke them in th' unguarded hour of reft ! Infernal facrifice ! dire ev'n too dire For my defpair 1 ^To me what have they done To merit fuch returns ? No, my revenge Demands the blood of one, and he fhall fall. Grime. It fhall fuffice 'Dunbar fhall bleed alone.- But let us feize him on the verge of blifs ; When the fond maid's enkind'ling looks confefs The flames of bafhful love : when eager joy. And inodeft fear, by turns exalt the bluih To a more fervid glow. ^AVhen Eleonora Unfolds Elyflum to his raptur'd view. And fmiles him to her arms. Stuart. Hah ! Light'ning fcofch Thy tongue, blafphemer ! Sooner may this globe Be hurl'd to the profound abyfs of hell ! But vain are words. This is no place remember. He fliall not triumph thus ! Thou hafl bely'd him ile means it not. Nor will the fyren fmile No, Grime, fhe dares not fmile him to her arms 1 Grime. Reproach, or mute difguft, is the reward Of candid friendfhip, that difdains to hide Unpalatable truth ! I tell thee, youth, BetrotJi'd by Angus to Dunbar, {he yields Her plighted faith, this hour. But fee ! the marJ Moves hitherward alone ! ' St J ART. A TRAGEDVi ^S Stuart. Hafte, ^ieave me, Grime ! My foul is up in arms ! My vengeance boils ! Love, jealoufy, implacable defpair In tem|)efts wheel.- Grime. Thou flialt not tarry here 1 Thy frantic rage may raftily overturn Our whole deilgn ! Stuart. Let me not tirge again Thy fwift departure ! hence I come anon. lExU Grime, SCENE III. Stuart, Eleonor^. Stuart. When laft we parted^ love had rcconcil'd Our mutur.i jealoufies ; and breath'd anew The foul of harmony within our breafts. Haft thou riot, llnce that period, ehtertain'd Qne adverfe thought to conftancy and me ? EtEONOiiA. Say who intefted thfcd with pow'r fupfeme O'er Eleonora's conduft j that thou com'ft With frowhing afpeft, thus, to judge my fame ? * Haft thou not forfeited all claim to me ? Have I not fe^n thee ftray from honour's path ? And fliall my love be to the bi'eaft confin'd. Where tfeafon in her dafkeft hu preftdes 1 I No I 66 The REGICIDE: No ! let me wipe thee, blotted as thou art. From my abhorrent thoughts !--^ Stuart. Not all this pride Of mimic virtue not th' aflembled hoft Of female wiles, how exquilite foe'er, Shall fhelter thee, deceive!- !^^ What new ftain Defile*- my bofom, fince the morning faw Thy tenderncfs o'erflow; and heard thy tongue Seduce me to thy faithlefs arms, again ? Eleonora. Is this the teftmony of thy love ? This thy alTerted honour ! to revile Defencelefs innocence ? But this will aid jNTy duty, to forget thee. ^Do'ft thou aik What recent outrage" has effrang'd my heart ? There needed none. ^The meafure of thy guilt Was full enough bcfofe. Yet thou haift heap'd Offences to excefs : in battle fought Againft thy king ; and fought, with lifted arm. My father's life-^-tingrateftil as- thou art ! Know then, the honour of my name forbids Our fates to join j ami it fliall ne'er be faid. That Eleon'ora, foft to glory, took '^ A traitor to her bed ! Stuart. Perfidious witch T Thy charms fliall not avail thee ; for I come Th* atejiglVig miriifter of broken faith ! To -claim the proniis'd fruitage of my love Or, mai^ me puniih, with thy J^uilt/ blood. Thy perjury and fraud ! Eli^onori. A TRAGEDl^' .7 ..:. f lE^LEONORA. Wilt thou attempt To gain by menaces, what the foft figh Of plaintive anguiih, would implore in vain ? Here ftrike and let thy ruthlefs poignard drink The blood of Douglas, which has often flow'4 In virtue's ea^ufe ; and ev*ry foil enrich'd, From wintry Scania to t^ie facred vale Where Lebanon exalts his lofty brow. Stuart. Egregious forc'refs ! give me back my peace- Bid yefterday return, that faw my youth Adorn'd in all its fplendor, and elate With gen'rous pride and dignity of foul ! Ere yet thy fpells had difcompos'd my brain, Unftrung my arm, and laid me in the duft. Beneath a rival's feet I < Eleonora, Hear all ye powers ! He claims of me, what his own confcious guilt Hath robb'd him of. And dofl: thou look for peace In my aflii' Thi? a The REGICIDH: This is too much to bear ! thou haft dcftroy'd My laft remains of peace ! i3uNBAR. Attd Was thy peace Deposited In him ? In him who rais'd His impious hand to kill thee \- ^Is it well 'JTo mourn his fall, and thus accufe the blew That rcfcu'd thee from death f Eleonora. I blame not the, No, heav'n forbid I ^I blame not my protestor- Yet thy proteiHiion has undone me quite ! And I will mourn for ever mourn the hour Th' ill-omen'd hour, that on thy fword conferr'd Such terrible fuccefs ' H ow pale appear Thefe clay-cold cheeks where grace and vigour glow'd ! O difmal fpe<5lacle How humble now Lies that ambition which was late fo proud F Did he not call me with his lateft breath ! He would have faid ^but cruel fiite controul'd liis fault'ring tongue l^ He w6uld have faid, " For thee, " For thee falfe maid, I perifh undeplor'd !" O ! had'ft thou known how obftinately true My heart remained to thee, when thy ov.-n guilt, My duty, and thy rival's worth, conipir'd To banifh thee from thence ; thy parting foul Would have acquitted nay, perhaps, bewail'd My pcrfecuted trutli \ Dunbar. O turn thine eyes From the fad objeft-! Turn thy melting thoughts From the difaftrous theme, and look on me On me who would with qxftacy-refign This A TRAGEDY. 73 This wi-etched being, to be thus embalm'd With Eleonora's tears ! -Were I to fall, Thy pity would not thus -lament my fate ! Eleonqra- Thy death, fuch lamentation would not move, More envy'd than bemoan'd ; thy memory/ Would ftill be cherifli'd, and thy name furvive To lateft ages, in immortal bloom. Ah, 'tis not fo with him ! He leaves behind No dear remembrance of unfull/d fame ! No monument of glory, to defy The ftorms of time ! Nought but reproach and fliame 1 Nought^ but perpetual flander, brooding o'er His reputation loft !< O fearful fcene Of dire cxiftence^ that muft never clofe ! S C E N E VI. Angus eniring) Eleonora, Dunbar, attendants. Angus. '^ What found of female woe ^Ha ! Stuart flain ! Alas ! I fear thou art the fatal caufe ! [To Eleonora. Eleonora, Too well my father has divin'd the caufe Of their unhappy ftrife ! Wherefore, ye powers ! Am I to mifery (ieliver'd up ! What kindred crime (alas !) am I decreed To expiate, that misfortunes fall fo thick On my poor head ! Angus to Dunbar. How durft your lawlefs rage Profane this facred place with private brawl ! K Dunbar. 74 The. REGICIDE: Dunbar* By hcav*n ! no place how much foe'er rever'J, Shall fcreen th' aflTaflin who, like him, would aiiH The murd'rous fteel at Eleonora's bjreaft | Angus. Ha !- were his aims fo mercilefs ? ^Too juft The vengeance that o'ertook him ! But th' event With this unftable juncture ill accords ! Remove the body. ^Thou meanwhile retire, ^ Thy prefence may awake, qr aggravate The rage of Athol. [T^^^ ^'^y '^ removeJL Dunbar. Therefore I obey. And O thou lovely mourner ! who now droop'ft Like the fpread rofe beneath th' inclement fhower. When next we meet, I hope to fee thee bloom With vernal frefhnefs, and again unfold Thy beauties to the fun ! \_Exit Dunbar, 8- C E N E Vllr Angus, Eleonora. Angus. Let us, my child. Lament with fteadinefs, thofe ills that flow From our mifhap : yet therefore not afcribe To felf demerit, impotently griev'd. The guilt of accident. ^Thou haft enough Denoted thy concern. Let me not think, Thy forrow hath cfpoufed a trfUtor's canfe. Eleonora. A tRAGEDY. 75 Eleonora. Ah ! what avails to me, the hard won pahn Of fruitlcfs virtue ? Will it lull to reft Internal anguilli ! Will it yield me peace ? Angus. ' Thy indlfcreet affli(flion, fhall not plead Againft thee, with me, now. Remember this. If thou art weak enough to harbour ftill A guilty flame , to thy affiftance call ' That noble pride and dignity of fcorn, Which warms, exalts, and purifies the foul. But I will truft thee to thyfelf. ^Withdraw ; For Athol comes, and on his vifage lours A ftorm of wrath. [^Exit Eleonora. SCENE VIII. Angus, Athol. Athol. Are thefe the fair efte^a Of our fubmifllon ! ^Thefe, the promised fruits Of amity reftor'd ! To violate The laws of hofpitality ^to guide The midnight murderer's inhuman blow. And facrifice your guefts ! Angus. That Athol mounls This unforefeen feverity of fate, I marvel not.- My own paternal fenfe Is wak'd by fympathy -, and I condole His interefling lofs. But thus to tax Our blamelefs faith with traitorotis defign, K 2 Not 76 The: REGICIDE Not with our pure integrity conforms. Nor with thy duty, Thane. Athol. Ha ? ^who art thou, That I fhould bear thy cenfure and reproof ? Not proteftation, nor th' afFefted air , Of fympathy and candour, fhall amufe My ftrong conception, nor elude the cry Of juftice and revenge ! Angus, Had juftice crav'd "With rigid voice, the debt incurr'd by thee How had'ft thou far'd ? Say, what has plac'd thy deeds Abpve my cenfure ? Let this day's event Proclaim how far I merit thy dildain. That my humanity is mifconceived Not much alarms my wonder : confcious fraud Still harbours with fufpicion. Let me tell thee The fate of Stuart was fupremely juft. Th' untimely ftroke his favage heart prepar'd Againft the guiltlefs bn-eaft of Eleonora, Avenging heav'n retorted on himfelf. * Atiicl. I thought v^here all thy probity would end, Difguis'd accomplice ! But remember, Lord, Should this blood-fpotted bravo 'fcape, fecure in thy proteftion, or th' unjuft extent Of regal pow'r ; by all my wrongs ! I'll fprcad Th' feeds of vengeance o'er th' affrighted land. And blood ftiall anfwcr blood ! Angus. A TRAGEDY. 77 Angus4 How far thy threats Are to be fear'd, we know. But fee, the king ! SCENE IX. King, Angus, Athol. King. Tell me ^proud Thanes, why are ye found oppos'd In loud revillngs ? You, that fhould promote By fair example, unity and peace ! Athol. Have I not caufe to murmur and complain ? Stuart, the lateftgift and deareft pledge Of love fraternal, footh'd my bending age : Him jiath the unrelenting dagger torn From my parental arms j and left (alas I) This faplefs trunk, to ftretch its wlther'd boughs To you for juftice ! ^Juftice then I crave. King. To fend the injur'd unredrefs'd away. How great foe'er the offender, or the wrong'd Howe'er obfcure, is wicked weak and vile : Degrades, defiles and fhould dethrone a king I Say freely. Thane, who hath aggriev'd thee thus-. And were he dear as her who Ihares our tlirone^ Thou {halt have ample vengeance. Athol. Then I charge The fon of March with perfidy and murder. Angus. 78 The REGICIDI:; " "J Angus. Were I with mean indifference to hear Th' envenom'd tongue of calumny traduce Defencelels worth, I ihould but ill deferve Your rpyal confidence. ^Dunbar has flain The kinfinan of this tliane ; yet fell he not By murder, cowardice, or foul deiign. The fword of Stuart was already drawn To (acrifice my daughter, when Dunbar, , By heaVn diretfled hither, interpos'd, Redeem'd the trembling vidtim, and repell'd His rival's fury on his haplcfs head. Athoi.. Mnft I refer me to the partial voice Of an invet'rate foe ? No, I rejedl The tainted evidence, and rather claim The combat proof ^Enfeebled are my limbs With age that creeps along my nerves unftrung. Yet fhall the juflice of my caufe recal My youthful vigour, roufe my loif ring blood. Swell ev'ry fincw, ftrengthen ev'ry limb, And crown me with fuccefs Behold my gage I wait for juflice. King. Juftice fliak thou have Nor fhall an equitable claim depend On fuch precarious ifTue ? ^Who fhall guard The weak from violence, if brutal force May vindicate oppreffion. ^Truth alone Shall rule the fair deciiion, and thy wrongs. If thou art wrong'd, in my unbiafs'd fway Shall find a juft avenger. Let Dunbar ,' Ap- A TRAGEDY. 79 Appear when urg'd, and anfwer to the charge [To Angus. [Exeunt King, Angus, SCENE X Athol, Grime. Athol. Curfe on the fmooth Uiflembler ! ' W elcome Grime, My foul is wrought to the fublimeft rage Of horrible revenge ! If aught remain'd Of cautious fcruple, to the fcattr'ing winds I give the phantom. May this carcafe rot, A loathfonie banquet to the fowls of heav*n. If e'er my breaft admit one thought to boun4 The progrefs of my hate ! Grime. What means my Prinze ? ATHOt. Th' unhappy youth is ^ain ! Grime. Ha !- HeU be prab'd-- He was a peevifh ftripling, prone to change. [Afide, Vain is condolence. Let our fwords be Iwift. To fate his hov'ring fhade. I have conferr'd With trufly Cattan, Our defign explained, \^nd his full aid fecur'd ^to night, he rules The middle watch. ^The clans already move In filence o'er the plaif}. Athol, 8o The REGICIDE: Athol. Come then ye powers ' That dwell with night, and patronize revenge ! Attend our invocation, and confirm Th' exterminating blow ! My boughs are lopt, But they will fprout aguin : My vig'rous trunk Shall flouriili from the wound my foes have made. And yet again, proje^ an awful fhade. END OF THE FOURTH ACI\ A TRAGEDY. i AC TV. SCENE I. King, Queen, Dunbar. Queen. \^ ! this was more than the ill-forted train Of undetermin'd fancy ! This convey'd . No loofe imperfefl images : But all Was dreadfully diftinft ! as if the hand Of fate had wrought it. ^Profit by thofe figns Your guardian angel dilates. O my Prince ! Let not your blind fecurity difgrace The merit of your prudence. King. No, my Queen, Let us avoid the pppofite extremes Of negligence fupine, and proftrate fear.r~ Already hath our vigilance perform'd What caution juftifies : and for thy dream ; As fuch confider it.* The vain eSet Of an imagination long difturb'd. Life, with fubftantial ills, enough is curs'd : Why (hould we then, with frantic zeal, purfue Unreal care ; and with th' illulive form Which our own teeming brain produc'd, affi^ight. Our reafon from her throne ? L QUEKN. 8a The REGICIDE: Queen. In all your courfe Of youthful glory, when the guiding hand Of warlike Henry led you to the field j When my foul fuffer'd the fucceffive pangs Of fond impatience and repreffive fear : When ev'ry reeking meflenger from France, Wreath'd a new garland for Albania's Prince, And fhook my bofom with the dreadful tale That fpoke your praife ; fay, did my weak defpair Recal you from the race ? Did not my heart Efpoufe your fame, and patiently await The end of your career ? O ! by the joys I felt at yotir return, when fmiling love Secure, with rapture reign'd. O ! by thefe tears. Which feldom plead , indulge my boding foul ! Arroufe your conqu'ring troops ; let Angus guard The convent with a chofen band. ^The foul Of treafon is abroad ! King. r ' Ye ruling powers ! Let me not wield the fceptre of this realm, When my degen'rate breaft becomes the haunt Of haggard fear. O ! what a wretch is he, Whofe fev'rous life devoted to the gloom Of fuperftition, feels th' inceflant throb Of ghaftly panic ! ^n whofe ftartled ear The knell ftill deepens, and the ra^en croaks ! Queen. Vain be my terrors my prefages vain - Yet with my fond anxiety comply, And my rcpofe reftore ! Not for myfelf Not A TRAGEDY. 83 i'Jot to prolong the feafon of my life, Am I thus fuppliant. Ah no ! for you For you whofe being gladens and protects A grateful people. You, whofe parent boughs Defend your tender offspring from the blafts That foon would tear them up ! for you, the (burce Of all our happinefs and peace^ I fear ! [Kneels. King?. Arife my Queen O ! thou art all^^compos'd Of melting piety and tender love ! Thou fhalt be fatisfy'd.- Is ev'ry, guard By Angus vilited ? Dunbar. Ev'n now, my liege. With Ramfay and his tropp, he fcours the plain. King. Still watchful o'er his charge ^The lib'ral hand Of bounty will have nothing to beftow, 'Ere Angus ceafe to merit ; Say, Dunbar, Who rules the nightly watch ? .*.f.,*'i< T'^^- DUNB\jR. To Cattan's care The city guard is fubjefit. King. I have mark'd Much valour in him. ^Hie thee to him, youth^ And bid him with a chofen few, furround The cloifters of the Convent ; and remain 'Till mom full ftreaming fhall relieve Jiis watch. ^^x/V Dunbar. ^t Tre regicide : Thus fhall repofe, with glad afTurance, isa^ (^ " , Its bahny bleffing to thy troubled breaft. {Bx^nst. S C E N B XL Grime, Cattan- Grime. Thus Car, brave Cattan, fortune feems incHn'd To recompence us for the day's difgrace. Our band conceal'd within the'cloifters, wait With eagemefs and joy the aufpicious hour. To perpetrate the deed. It now remains. To regulate our conduft, and to each His fhare of this great enterprize affign. If Angus lives, in vain our arms devote The ufurper and his progeny to death : His power and principles will ftill fupply Frefh obftacles, which aU o.u^ future efForts . Can ne'er flu-mount. '*""''*' >^'J^ ','/.' Cattan. Then let our fwords prevent All further oppofition, and at once Difmifs him to the fliades. Grime. Thine be the taflc- I know with what jufl indignation burns Thy gen'rous hate, againfl the partial thane. Who, to thine age and fervices, preferred A raw unpradlis'd flripling. Cattan. Ha \-- no more. The bare remembrance tortures mc ! O Grime How A TRAGEDY. ^ How will my foul his mortal groans enjoy [ Grime. ^ While we within perform the intrepid blow^ To his apartment thou fhalt move alone : Nor wiji pretence be wanting : Say^ thou'bring'il Intelligence important, that demands His inftant ear : then fhalt thou find the foe Unarm'd and unattende. ^ Need my tongue Inflruct thee further ? Cattan. No, -4et my revenge Suggeft what follows By the pow'rs of hell ! I will be drunk with vengeance! Grime. To the guard Meanwhile repair, and wat-ch 'till he returns With Ramfay from the plain. -But fee they come, We roiift avoid them, and^ retire unfeen. \Exemt. SCENE III. An Apartment. Angus, Rjvmsay- Angus. By heav'n it much alarms me ! ^Wide o'er all The dufky plain, by the fires half extin^l. Are feen the foldiers, roU'd in heaps confus'd, The flaves of brutal appetite. Save thofe Beneath thy difcipline, fcarce one remains Eromthe conton free. * Ramsay. 16 The REGICIDE: RlMSAT. / When we retum'd Fatigued from battle, numbers brought, unalk'd, Refrefhmentsfor the wounded from the town : Thence, the temptation fpread from rank to rank, And few refifted. Angus. But that I confult Wy king's tranquillity, and would not wake Th* afirighted citizens with an alarm, An hundred trumpets fhould this inftant, raifc Their brazen throats together, and arroufe Th' extended fluggards. Go, my valiant friend. And with thy uninfected troop attend To ev'ry motion of th' uncertain night. [^Exit Ramfay. S C ^ N E IV. Angus. Now the loud tcmpeft of the toilful day SuWides into a calm.-TrAnd yet my foul Still laboiurs thro' the ftorm !-'-By day or night, In florid youth, or mellow age, fcarce fleets One hour without its care ! Not fleep itfelf Is ever balmy ; for the fliadowy dream Oft befirs fubftantial woe ! * ' S C E N E V. Angus, Cattan. Cattan. My noble Lord, Within the portal as I kept my watch, Swift A TRAGEDY. Zj Swift gliding fhadows by the glimm'ring moon, I could perceive in forms of armed men, Poflefs the fpace that borders on the porch- I queftion'd thrice ; they yielded no reply : And now the foldiers, rang'd in clofe array, Wait your coraanand. Angus. Quick, lead me to the place- Foul treafoij is at work !- ,Cattaw. It were not good To venture forth unarm'd,. Courageous thane. Receive this dagger. \Attempis to jlab Angus y who nvrejis the dagger from him^ nd kills him. Angus. Ha, perfidious flave ' What means this bafe attempt ! ^Thou fhalt not 'fcapev Cattan. Curfe on my feeble arm that fail'd to ftrike The poignard to thy heart ! How like a do I tamely fall uefpis'd ! Angus. Fell ruffian ' fay. Who fet thee on ? ^This treachery, I fear, Is but the prelude to fome di-eadful fcene ! Cattan, Jttft are thy terrors ^by the eternal gulph That opens to receive me ! I would plunge Into the abyfs with iov, could the fuccef? Of 8 The REGICIDE: Of AthoJ feaft my fenfe 1 \_A TKjife of clajhing /words andfiirieks. ^Hah ! mm the fword Of {laughter fmoaks !- Hi' exulting thane furveys Th' Imperial icene , while grimly fmiting Grime With purple honours decked. Angcts. Tremend'ous powers ! Cattan. 0*er the fall'n tyrant ftrides {Dies. Angus. Heav'n fhield us all 1 V ^ '' ' Amazing horror chills me ! Ha, Dunbar ! Then treafon trium'phs 1-*- O ! my fon ' my fon ! SCENE VI. Angus, Dunbar wounded. Dunbar. I fought thee, noble Thane, while yet my limbs Obey their lord.- I fought thee, to unfold My zealous foul, 'ere yet flie takes her flight.**^^ Stretch'd on the ground, thefe eyes beheld the king Transfix'd a lifelefs corfe ! And faw this arm Too late to fave ^too feeble to avenge him ! Angus, Weep Caledonia, weep ! ^thy peace is flain Thy father and thy king ! O ! this event. Like a vaft mountain, loads ttiy ftaggering foul. And crulhcs all her pow'rs I But fay, my friefid. If yet thy (Irength permits, how this befcl. DUNBAR.' A TRAGEDY. ip Dunbar. A band of rebels, glean'd from the defeat, By Athol, lurk'd behind the adjacent hills : Thefe, faithlefs Cattan, favour'd by the night. Admitted to the city, join'd their power With his corrupted guard, and hither led them Unmark'd, where foon they entred unoppos'd- Alarm'd, I ftrove but ftrove, alas ! in vain. To the fad fcene 'ere I could force my way. Our monarch was no more I Around him lay An heap of traitors, whom his lingle arm Had flain before he fell-- ^Th' unhappy queen, Who, to defend her confort's had oppos'd Her own defencelefs frame, expiring, pour'd Her mingling blood in copious flxeam with his ! Angus. iUuftrious viftims ! O difaft'rous fate ! Unfeeling monfters ! execrable fiends ! To wanton thus in royal blood I Dunbar. O Thane : How fhall I fpeak the iequel of my tale ! How will thy f6nd parental heart be rent With mortal anguiih, w^hcn my tongue relates The fate of Eleonora ! Angus. Ha ! my fears Anticipate thy words I O fay, Dunbar, How fares my child ! Dunbar. The fliades of endlefs night Now fettle o'er her eyes ! ^Iieroic maid ! .M She ^o Th6 REGICIDE: She to th' aflaulted threlhold bravely ran, And with her fnowy arm fupply'd arboit To bar their entrance -.-T-But the barb'rous crew Broke in impet'ous, crufhM her flender Hmb, When G/ime, his dagger brandifliing, exclaim'd. Behold the forc'refs whofe accurfed charms Betrayed tlie youth ; and whofe invet'rate fire This day revets'd our fortune in the field ! This for revenge ! -then plufig'd it in her b'reaft F ^ Angxjs. InfemSl homicide f f)UNBAli. There there I own He vanquifh'd ,me indeed ! ^What tho' I ruftfd Thro' many a wound, and in th' affaflin's heart Lubrew'd my faithful fteel. But fecy where comes By her attendants led, the bleeding fair ! SCENE VII. Angus, Dunbar, ELfiONORA tuouhded and ftipportedi Eleonora. Here fet me down vain is your kind concern- Ah ! who, with parent tendernefs, will blefs My parting foul, and clofe my beamlefs eyes ! Ah ! who defend me, and with pious care To the cold' grivc commit my pale remains I \Sivoons. Angus. O mifery I look up thy father calls {^Embracing her. Eleonora. What angel borrows that paternal voice ! kar A TRAGEDY. 91 Ha ! lives my father ! -Ye propitious powers! He folds me in his arms ^Yes, he fiirvives Tlie havock of this night ! O let me now Yield up my fervent ibul with raptur'd praife I For Angus live^ t' avenge his mur4er'd prince, To fave his country, and protract his blaze Of glory, farther llill | Angus. And is it thus. The melting parent clafps his darling child t My heart is torn with agonizing pang^ Of complicated woe ! IJUNBAR. The pubhc craves lirtmediate aid from thee But I wax weak. Our infant King furrounded in the fort, Demands thy prefent help. r ' Angu^. Yes, loyal youth I Thy glorious wounds inftrut me, what I owe To my young fov'reign, and my country's peace i But how fhall I fuftain the rav'nous tribe Of various griefs,, tli^t gnaw me all at once ? My royal mafter falls, my country groans. And cruel fate has r.ayifli'd from niy iide ' ; My deareft daughter aiid my beft loy'd friend 1 Dunbar. Thy praife fhall be thy daughter ; and thy friend - Survive unch^ng'd in ev'ry hpneft breaft. Angus. Muft we then part for ever ! -What a plan ' ' M 2 ' Of >s The REGICIDE: Of peaceful happinefs, my hope had laid In thee and her ! alas ! thou fading flower, How faft thy fweets confume ! come to my arms, That I may tafte them e're they fleet away ! [^Embracing her, O exquifite diflrefs ! # Eleonora. For me, my father. For me let not the bootlefs tear diftil. Soon fhall I be with thofe, who Teft fecure From all th' inclemencies of ftormy life. A^GUS. Adieu, my children ! never fhall I hear Thy chearing voice again ! a long farewell ! {_Exit Angus^ _ SCENE VIII. Dunbar, Eleonora. Dunbar. Soon {hall our fhort'ned race of life be run. Our day already haftens to its clofe ; And night eternal comes. -Yet, tho' I touch The land of peace, and backward view, well pleas'd, The tofling wave from which I fliall be free : No reft will greet me on the filent fhore. If Eleonora fends me heacc unblefe'd. Eleonora. Diftemper'd paflion (when we parted laft) Ufurp'd my troubled bofom, and Dunbar With horror was beheld : but reafon now With genial mildnefs beams upon my foul, And A TRAGEDY. 93 And reprefents thee juftly, as thou art^ :'^ The tend'reft lovei' and the gent'ieft friend. Dunbar. O tranfport, to i^y breaft unknown before ! Not the foft breeze, upoii its fragrant wings, , Wafts fuch refrelhing gladnefs to the heart Of panting pilgrims, as thy balmy words To my exhau(led fpirits ! -but alas ! Thy purple ftream of life forfakes, apace, Its precious channels ? on thy polilh'd cheek The blowing rofes fade j and o'er thine eyes Death ih^ds a miily langour ! Eleonoua. Let me lean Upon thy friendly arm Yet, O retire ! Thnt guilty arm I Say, did it ne'er rebel Againft my peace ? But let me not revolve Thofe forrows now. Were heay'n agkin to raifc That once Icv'd head that lies (alas) fo low ! . And from the verge of death my life recal ; What joy could vilit my forlorn eilate, ^If-doom'd to hopelefs woe ! Dunbar. Muft I Then wander A penfive fhade, along the dreary vale, And groan for ever under thy reproach ! Eleonora. Ah no ! thou faithful youth, (hall I repay Thy love and virtue with ungrateful hate ? Thefe wounds that wafte fo lavifhly thy life. Were they not all receiv'd in my defence ? ;^ay no repofe embrace me in the tomb, 4/ If Jt4 Th regicide : If my foul mourns rot thy untimely fall With fifter woe I -thy paflionhas not reap'd The fweet returns its purity deferv'd. Dunbar. A while forbear, pale Minifter of fate. Forbear a while *, and on my raviih'd ear Let the laft muiic of this dying fwan. Steal in foft blandifhment, divinely fweet ! Then ftrike th' unerring blow.? Eleonora. That thus, our hopes Which bloflcm*d num'rous a? the flow'ry fpring. Are nipp'd untimely, ere the fun of joy Matur'd them into fruit ; repine not, youth.- ''" Life hath its various feafons, as the year ; And after cluft'ring autumn but I faint Support me nearer-- in rich harveft's rear Bleak winter muft have lagg'd. Oh i now I feel The leaden hand of death lie heavy on me. Thine image fwims before my draining eye. And now it difappears.^ Speak bid adieu To the loft Eleonora. -Not a word } ^Not one farewell ! -Alas ? that difmal groan Is eloquent diftrefs ! Celeftial powers Protc^l thy father, fliow'r upon his-; Oh ' [jD/>/, Dunbar. There fled the pureft foul that ever dwelt In mortal clay r-I come my love ' I come Where now the rofy tin<^ure of thefe lips ! The fmile that grace ineffable difflis'd ' The glance that fmote the foul with fllent wonder The voice that footh'd the anguifli of difeaCe, And A TRAGEDf, ^j And held attention captive ! ^Let me kifs This pale deferted temple of my joy ! Thisj chaftity, this, thy unfpotted ihade Will not refufe. I feel the griefly king- Thro' all my veins he fhivers like the north P Eleoriora ! as my flowing blood Is mix'd with thine. ^So may our mingling fouls To blifs fupernal wing our happy Oh ! ^Diesl SCENE the Laft. An*gus, Ramsay^ Athol, l^c. Prifoners. Angus. Bright deeds 6i gloi-y hath thine ami atchiev'd. Courageous Ramfay ; and thy h^me fhall live F6r ever in the annals of renowm.- r-But fee, where lilent as the noon of night j Thefe lovei-s lie ! reft- reff ill-fatetf pair 1 " Your de^r remembrance fhall for ever dwell" Within' the b'reaft of Augus ; arid his love Oft with paternal tears bedew your tomb I Ramsay. O fatal fcene of innocence deftroy'd } Angus, io Atlxl. O bloody author of this night's mifliap ! Whofe impious hands are with the facred blood Of Majefty diftain'd ! ^^Contemplate here The havock of thy crimes \ and then bethink the^. , What vengeance craves.' Athol. 96 The REQICIDE Athol. With infolence of fpeecli How dares thy tongue Uccntious, thus infult Thy fovVeign, Angus ? Madly hath thy zeal Efpous'd a finking caufe. But thou may'ft ftill Deferve my future favour. Angus. O thou ftain Of fair nobility ! ^thou bane of faith ! Thou woman-killing coward, who haft crept To the unguarded throne, and ftabb'd thy Prince 1 What hath thy treafon, blafted as it is, To bribe the foul of Angus to thy views ? Athol. Soon fhalt thou rue th'indignity now tlirown On me thy lawful Prince.-^ Yes, talking Lord, The day will foon appear, when I fhall rife In majefty and terror to aflert My country's freedom ; and at laft, avenge My own peculiar wrongs. ^\'\''hen thou, and all Thofe grov'ling fycophants, who bow'd the knee To the ufurper's arbitrary fway, Will fawn on me. ^Ye temporizing flavcs ! Unchain your king ; and teach your humble mouths- To kifs the duit oeneath my royal feet. iTo the Guard. Angus. The day will foori appear" !* Day fhall not thi-ice Return, before thy carcafe be caft forth Unbury'd, to the dogs and bcafts of prey. Or, A TRAGEDY. 5^7 Or, high-exalted, putrify In air * The monument of treafon. > Athol. Empty threat ! Fate hath foretold that Athol fhall be crown'd. Angus. Then hell hath cheated theo. Thou /halt be crown'd An iron crown, intenfely hot, fliall gird Thy hoary temples ; while the fhouting crowd Acclaims thee King of traitors. Athol. Lakes of fire ! Ha ! faidft thou Lord ! a glowing crown Shall gird my hoary temples ! Now I feel Myielf awake to mifery and fliame ! Ye ftcptres, diadems and rolling trains Of tlatt'ring pomp, farewell ' Curfe on thofe dreams Of idle fuperllition, that enfnare Th* ambitious foul to wickednefs and woe ! Curfe on thy virtue, which hath overthrown My elevated hopes ! and my defpair Defcend In pellllence on all mankind I Angus. Thy curfe juft heav'n retorts upon thyfeif ! To fep'rate dungeons lead the Regicides. [^Exlt Guard ivith the prifotur^s. From thirft of rule what dire difafters flow ! How flames that guilt ambition taught to glow 1 Wifh gains on wi/h, dcflrefurmQunts deiire; N Hope ^ Ths REGICIM Hope fans the blaze, and eitvj feeds the fire : From crime to crime afpires the mad'ning foul ; Nor laws, nor oaths, nor fears its rage controul j 'Till heav'n at length awakes, fupremely juft, And levels all its tow'ring fchemes in duft ! The REPRISAL; OR, THE TARS OF OLD ENGLAND : . .' A COMEDY OF TWO ATS. Firft performed at the Theatre Rotal in Druky-Lake, in 1757. N i ??: PERSONS REPRESENTED. Heartly, a young gentleman of Dorfetfhire, iu love with Harriet. Brush, his fervant. Champignon, commander of a French frigate. QcLABBER, an Irifh lieutenant in the French fervice. Maclaymore, a Scotch enfign in the French fervice. Lyon, lieutenant of an Englifh man of war, Haulyard, a midlliipman. Block, a failor. Harriet, a young lady of Dorfetfiiire, betroth- ed to lleartly. Soldiers, Sailors, &c. ,f ' Scene o hard a French Jljip lying at anchor on the Coafi, of Normandy. - . - . PR O L O G U E. , AN ancient f age J ivhen death approacUd his bed, JTL Coufigiid to Pluto his devctcd head ; And that m fiend might hifs or prove imclvllf JVith v And rife th^ unrivaPd emprefs of the main. J 'Hi^ THE REPRISAL, A C T I. S C E N E L, Heartly, Brush. Brush. WELL, if this be taking diverflon on the water, God fend me fafe on Englifli ground ! and if e- ver I come in fight of the fea again, may a watry grave be my portion : Firft, to be terrified with the thoughts of drowning : Secondly, to be tofied and tumbled a- bout like a foot-ball : Thirdly, to be drench'd with fcr.- water : Fourthly, to be fi:unk to death with pitch and tar and the favouiy feent of my fellow;-fufferers : Fifth- ly, to be racked with perpetual puking till my guts are turned infide out : And fixthly and laftly, to be taken prifoner and plundered by the French. Heartly. Enough Enough Brush. Enough ! aye, and to fpare I wifh I could give part to thofe who envy my good fortune : But, hew will the good lady Bioomwell moralize when (he finds her daughter Mifs -^^arriet is -fallen into the hands of Monfirar de Cha-mBis[tion ! Hkartly. 104 The REPRISAL: Heartly. No more that reflexion alarms me !- yet I have notliing to fear -as there is no war declared, we Ihall foon be relcafed ; and, in the mean time, the French will treat us with their ufual politenefs. Brush. Pox on their politenefs ! ah mafter ! commend me to the blunt fuicerity of the true fufly Britifh maftilF: The rafcalion that took my purfe bowed fo low, and paid me fo many coiiipliments, that I ventured to argue the matter in hopes of convincing him he was in the wrong ; but he foon ftopped my mouth with a ven- geance, by clapping a cocked piftol to my ear, and tel- ling me he fhould have the honour to blow my brains out : Another of thofe polite gentlem.en begged^ leave to exchange hats with me : A third fell in love with my filver fhoe buckles : N.jy, that very individual nice- but- tock of beef, which I had juft begun to furvey with looks of dcfire, after the dimial evacuation I had under- gone, was ravifhed from my fight by two familhed French wolves, who beheld it with, equal joy and a- fioniiKment. Heartly. I muft confefs they plundered us with great dexterity and difpatch J 'and even Monfieur de Champignon, the eomir^ander^ did not keep his hands clear of the pillage : -An inftancc or rapacioufncfs I did not expecl to meet with in a gcjitVanan and an officer. ^Sure he will be- have as fuch to Ka^'riet. Brush. Faith, not to flatter you, Sir, I take him to be one of tbole fellows who owe their good fortune to nothing Icfs A COMEDY. 105 lefs tHan their good works. -He firft rifled your miftrefs, and then made love to her with great gallantry but you was in the right to call yoyrfclf her brother If he knew you were his rival, you might pafs your time very difagrecabiy. " Heartly. There are two officers on be ird who leem to difap- prove of his conduft ; they would not be concerns ' in robbing us, nor would they fuffer their foldiers to take any ihare of the prey, but condoled Harriet and me on bur misfortune with marks of real coxjcern^ ". Brush. You mean Lieutenant Oclabber and Enfign Maclay- inore , a couple of damn'd renegadoes -you lean upon a broken reed if you truft to their coitipalfion. Heartly. Oclabber I knew at Paris, when I travelled with my brother j and he then bore the charaven! MACtAYMORE.'*! 'ii4 GifFit be an elegy, it muft be wtitteri in the carmen clegiacum; or gilF it be un ode, it may be monocolos, "dicolos^ tetraflrophos or perhaps, it's loofe iambics. OcLABEER, Arra, upon my confcience, I believe it is fimple fhamr brucks, honey, ^ut if you'll hold your tongue you fhall fee ^ith your own eyes. O 2 SONG. iq8 Thd reprisal : S O N G. 1. Ye fwains of the Shannon, fair Sheelah is goncj . Ye fwains of the Shannon, fair Sheelah is gone ; Ochone my dear jcAvel, Why was you fo cruel, Amidil my companions to leave me alone ? n. Tho' Tcague ihut the cafement in Bally-clough hallj Tho' Teague fliutthe cafement in Bally-clough hall j In the dark fhe was groping, And found it wide open j Och, the dc^il hixnfelf could not ftand fuch a fall. m. In beholding your charms, I can fee them no more, in beholding your charms, I can fee them no more j If you're dead do but own it, 1 hen you'll hear me bemoan it ; For in loud lamentations your fate I'll deplore. IV. Devil curfe this occaflon with tumults and ftrifc ! f^^ Devil curfe this occaflon with tumults and ftrife ! O ! the month of November, She'll have caufe to remember, As a black letter day all the days of her life. A COMEDY. V. A 09 Witli a rope I could catch the dear creature Tve Ibft [ With a rope I could catch the dear creature I've loft ! ' But, without a difmiffion, I'd lofe my commiffion, And be harig'd with difgrace for deferting my poft. Shall I never fee you, my lovely Sheelah, thefe feven long years ? An it pleafed God to bring us withiti forty miles of each other, I would never defire to be nearer all the days of my life. Maclaymore. Hoot-fie, Captain Oclabber, whare's a' your philofo pay ? Did you never read Seneca ek confolatione /* or Volufenus, my countrypiap, de tranqinll'ttate animi 9. 4ltfk I'fe warrant we have left a bonny iafs too, in the braes of Lochaber^ My yellow-hair'd deary that wont to meet me amang the hether. Heigh, firs ! how fhc grat and cried, JVaSs my heart that zve JJjould /under. Whiiht, what's a' that rippet ! {A n:tfe of drums, Oclabber. Arra-mon-deaul ! they are beating our grenadier's march, as if the enemy was in view : but I Ihall fetch them off long enough before they begin to charge ; or, by St Patrick I'll beat their Ikulls to a pancalce. Maclaymore* (To a bag-piper crrjjing the J} age.) Whare are ye ga'ane with the moofic, Donald ? Piper. Guid fait, an pleafe your honour, the commander has fent for her to play a fpring to the fafenach damfcl j but no The REPRISAL: but her nain fel wad na budge the length of her tac with- out your honour's order and fhe'U gar a' the me^ march liefore her witl>the Britifh flag and the reft of the plunder, Maclatmore. By my faral ! he's a gowk an a gauky, to ettle at divert- ing the poor lafly with the puppet-lhew of her aiu misfor- tune but, howfomever, Donald, ye may gang and en- tertain her with a pibroch of Macreemon's compofition -, and if {i\e has ony tafte for moofic, ye'U foon gar her forget her difafter. - OCLABBER. Arrah, now fince that's the caafe, I would not be guilty of a rude thing to the lady ; and if it be done to compofe her fpirits by my flioul the di'um fhall beat till fhe's both deaf and dumb, before t tell it to leave off But we'll go and fee the prox:effion^ {^Exeunt, SCENE m, A Procession. \Fifji the bag-pipe then a ragged dirty Jhect for the French colours -a file offoldiers in tatters the EngliJJj prijoners the plunder^ in the midfl of which is an Englijh buttock ' cf beef carried on the fhoulders of four meagre Frenchmen^ The drum followed by a crenv of French Jailors^ Champignon, Harriet. Champigno'n. Madame, you fee de fortune of de war my fate be admirable capricicux you be de prifonier of my arm I be de captive of your eye ^by gar, my glorie turn to' (ny-difgrace. Harriet* A COMEDY. Ill HARRIF.fl Truly I think fo too ^for nothing can be more dif- graceful than what you have done. Champignon. . Den vat I ave done ! parbleu ! I not underftand vat you mean, madame I have de honor to carry oft one great vidloire over de Englis. Harriet. You have carried off an unarmed boat contrary t& the law of nations, and rifled the pafTengers in oppofition to the dictates of iullice and humanity I fhould be glad to know what a comrhori robber could do worfe. Champignon. , Common robber ! Madame, your ferviteur tres humble de charm of your efprit be as brilliant as dc attraits of yoiir perfonne : in one and t'oder you be par- faitement adorable foufFrez den dat I prefent> my 'art at your altar. Harriet. If you have any heart to prefent, it muft be a very ftale fncrifice for my own part, I haVe no tatle for the fittmt j fo, you had better keep it for the ladies of your wn country, Moajifur. Champignon. Ah eruelle ! A COMEDY. :x^j Maclaymore. Traiter mc nac trailer ! Mefter Champignon, or gudc faith ! you and I man ha' our kail through the reek, Chamfignon. Vere be de prifoniers ? tell a me dat -ha ! ^mort de ma vie ! -de Englis vaifleau ! de prife ! de prifo- niers ! facrebleu ! ma gloire ! mes richeffes I rendez moi les prifoniers you be de enfcigne, you be de offi- eier. ^ Maclaymore. Troth, I ken foo weel I'm an officer I wufs fom^ other people, who hand their heeds unco high, ken'd the refpe6t due to ?n officer, we Ihould na be fafh'd wi' a' this din. ' ' Champignon. Tell a me au moment, vere be Monfieur Artlie I vere be de prifoniers ? vat you beat my brains wid your fottifes .<* Maclaymore. Nay, fin ye ^eat me with fa little ceremony, I man tell you, Mefter Heartly was na committed to my charge, and fae ye may gang and leuk after him ; and as for prifoners, I ken of nae prifoners but your ain va- let, whom you ordered to be put in irons this morn- kig for fupping part of your bouillon, and if the poor fallow had na done the deed, I think he muft have flarved for want of vidhials. Champignon. Morbleu ! Monfieur Maclaimore, you difiirait me wid your babil. I demand de Englis prifoniers ^m'en- tendez V9U2_ ? Maclaymore.- i2 TtfE REPRISAL. Maglaymore. Monfieur de Champignon, je vous entens blen - there was nae Englilh prifoner here ; for I man tell you, Sir, that if ever you had read Grotius de Jure Belli ac Pacisy or Picffendoi-f de Officio Homuiis et Civis, ye wad a' feen he could na be in the predicament of a captus in helloy or an obfes pr vades rfor what ? ye'U fay- -becaufc he was na ttvik. flagrante bello-ergo he was nae prifoner of war ^now \\ hat fays the learned Puffendorf ? ; Champignon. Comment' you call me Puff-and-horf ? ventre bleu* you be one impertinent. Maclaymore. What, what I ^that's a paughty word, Sir that's nae language for a gentleman ^nae mair o' that, or guid faith we'll forget where we are. Champignon. Morbleu * yea ave forget dat I be your general your. chef. Maclaymore, By my faul, man, that's ftrange news indeed You my chief ! you chief of the Maclaymores ! Champignon. Oui, moi, ruftre ihoi qui vous park. Maclaymore. Dinna ruftre me, Sir, or deel dam my faul, but 111 wraft your head aff your fhoulders, if ye was the beft Champignon in France. S^^he^ draw andjight. SCENE A COMEDY. 1^ S C E N E DL OcLABBER, Champignon, Maclaymore* OCLABBER. Devil fire you, my lads ! what's the maining of all this difturbance ? o' my confcience ! there's no fuch thing as refting below a man would lie as quiet at the bottom of the fea- I've been abed thefe tree hours, but I could not clofe an eye, gra ; for you waked me before I fell afleep. [^Pretending to difcover ChampignonI\ Arrah now, don't I dream, honey ? what is it your own felf Monfieur de Champignon, going to attack my en- fign ? By my fhoul ! that's not fo fhivil now, aboard of your own fhip. Gentlemen, I put you both under ar- reft in the king's name you fliall fee one another locked in your cabins with your own hands ; and then, if you cut one another's troats, by the blefled vir- gin ! you fhall be brought to 3 court martial, and tried for your lives, agra. MACLATM0RE,y&m//6/g- his fivord. Weel, weel. Sir, ye're my commanding officer; tuum eji imperare hut, he and I fall meet before mouii- tains meet, that's a'. Champignon, to Oclabber. Vat ! you prefume to entrcmettre in mes affaires d'ho- neur ^you have de hardiefle to difpute wid me de command of dis vaifleau de guerre ? ^tdl a me if you know my condition, ha ? Oclabber. Indeed, indeed my dear, I believe your prefent con- dition is not very favoury ; but, if Enfign Maclaymore R had 1.^6 The REPRISAL: had made you fhorter by the head, your condition would have been ftill worfe ; and yet, upon my con- fcience ! I have feen a man command fuch a frigate as this, without any head at all. Champignon. Monfieur O-claw-bear, you mocquez de moi you not feem to know my nqblefle dat I defcend of dc bonne famille-^lat my progeniteurs ave bear de ho- norable cotte de cotte of antiquite. OCLABBER. By my fhoul ! when I knew you firft, you bore a ve- ry old coat yourfelf, my dear ; for it was thread-bare, , and out at elbows. Champignon. Ah ! la mauvaife plaifanterie. Daignez, my good lieutenant O-claw-bear, to pnderftand dat I ave dc , grands alliances du bien de rente dat I ave regale des princes in my chateau. OCLABBER. 1 Och ! I beg your chateau's pardon, grammachree ! I have had the honour to fee it on the banks of the Ga- ronne and by my fhoul ! a very venerable building it was aye, and very well bred to boot, honey ; for it flood always uncovered , and never refufed entrance to any paflenger, even though it were the wind and the rain, gra. Champignon. You prctendez to know my famille, ha ? Oci.ABBER. By Shaint Patrick, I know them as well as the fa- ther A COMEDY. 131 ther that bore them. Your nephew is a begging bro- ther of the order of Shaint Francis ; Mademoifelle, your fifter, efpoufed an eminent favatier in the -county of Bearne , and your own Ihelf, my dear, firft mounted the ftagc as a charlatan, then ferved the Count de Bar- dafch for your diverfion, and now, by the King's favour, you command a frigate df twelve guns,lying at an- chor within the province of Normandy. Champignon. Ah quelle medifance ! que vous imaginez bien, Monlieur but I vil reprefent your conduit to des mare- chaux of France ; and dey vil convince you dat Mon- fieur de Champignon is one perfonne of fome confide- ration un charlatan ! mardy ! dat be ver plaifant. Meffieurs, ferviteur I go to give de neceflaires ordres pour rattraper de Englis chaloupe jufque au revoir Charlatan ! Savatier ! Mort de ma vie. [Exit, SCENE III. OCLABBER, MaCLAYMORE. OCLABBER. Faith and troth, my dear, you'll fee the chaloupe far enough out of iight by this time. Maclaymore. By my faul ! captain, ye fent him awa' with a flea in his bonnet ^He'U no care to wrertle ^nither fa' with you in a hurry ^He had the wrang fow by the lug. OCLABBER. If he will be after playing at rubbers, he muft expedl to meet with bowls pooh ! I main, he m.uft look; to. meet with bowls, if he will be playing at rubbers arra R 2 man 132 The reprisal : man deaul I that's not the thing nmther ; but you know my maining, as the faying is. Maclaymore. Hoot aye I'fe warrant I ken how to gar your bowls row right and troth I canna help thinking but I play- ed my part pretty weel for a beginner. OCLABBER. For a beginner ! ^Devil fetch me, but you played like a man that jokes in earneft : But your joke was like to cut too keen, honey^ when I came to part you ; and yet I came as foon as you tipped me the wink with your finger. Maclaymore. Let that flee flick i' the Ava' when the dirt's dry it will rub out. But now we man take care of the poor waff lafly that's left under our protection, and defend her from the maggots of this daft Frenchman. OCLABBER. I will be after confining him to his cabin, if he of- fers to touch a hair of her beard, agra. Maclaymore. It's now break of day dinna ye fee the bonny grey- eyed mom blinking o'er yon mofly craig ? ^We'll e'en gang doun and tak a tafle of whiflcy together, and then fee what's to be done for Mifs Harriet. lExeiwt. SCENE :^-A COMEDY. fi35 SCENE IV. Harriet, Brush. Harriet. O Lord ! Fm in fuch a flutter -What was the mean- ing of all that noife ?- Brufh, are you fure your maftcr is out of all danger of being retaken ? Brush. Yes, yes, Madam, fafc enough for this bout. The two land officers performed their parts to a miracle. My mafter and our people flipped into the boat, with- out being difturbed by the Gentries, who were tutored for the purpofe , and they were almofl: out of fight, be- fore Champignon was alarmed by a fl:arved Frenchman, whofe hunger kept him awake : But now they have doubled the point of land, and in four hours, or fo, will be in fight of fweet Old England. I'm fure I fent ma- ny a wifliful look after them. Harriet. What ! you are forry then for having fl:aid 'behind with me. Brush. O ! by no manner of means. Ma'am ^to be fure you did me an infinite deal of honour. Ma'am, in defiring that I might be left, when you fpoke to my mafter through the barricado -, but yet, Ma'am, I,have fuch a regard for Mr Heartly, Ma'am, that I fliould be glad to fhare all his dangers, Ma'am ^though, after all is done and faid, I don't think it was very kind in him to leave his miftrefs and faithful fervant in fuch a dilemma. Harriet. 134 The REPRISAL : Harriet. Nay, don't accufe your mafter unjuftly. You know how unwillingly he complied with my requeft. We could not guefs what villainous fteps this fellow, Cham- pignon, might have taken to conceal his rapine, which Mr Heartly will now have an opportunity to xeprefent in its true colours. Brush. Well ^Heaven grant him fuccefs, and that fpeedily. For my own part, I have been fo long ufed to his com- pany, that I grow quite chicken-hearted in his abfence. If I had broke my leg two days ago, I Ihould not have been in this quandary. God forgive the man that firft contrived parties of pleafure on the water, Harriet. Hang fear, Brufh, and pluck up your courage. I have fome fmall Ikill in phyfiognomy, and can aiTure you it is not your fate to die by water Ha ! I fee the captain coming this way ^I muft bear the brunt of another llorm. Brush. ,^.- -sri Odfo ! Ill run down to lieutenant Oclabber, and his enfign, and give them notice, in cafe there fhould be occallpn tpinterpofe. [_Exii Bri//h, S C E N E V. Champignon, Harriet. Champignon. Madame, you pardon ray prefumpticn, dat I pay my devoirs in dHh -.bille but it be all for your icrvice Monlicur your amant ave decampe fans facon I take de A COMEDY. i35 dc alarm, and make all my efforts to procure you de plaifir of feeing him again Ah, he be de gallant homme to abandon his maitreile ! Harriet. Is there no poffibility of bringing him back ? Champignon. By gar, it be tout-a-fait impoffible -he Ileal commc ne thief into de chaloupe, and vanifh in de obfcurite. Harriet. I'm heartily glad to hear it. Champignon. For vat you be glad, my princefs, ha ? Harriet. That he's no longer in your power. Champignon. Bon !; jufte ciel ! how you make me happy to fee you glad, Madame ! la, la, la, ra, ra Ventre bleu ! he be one fugitif If we rencontre again, revanche \ la, la, la, ra, ra ^Permettez done, Madame, dat I ave de ho- neur to languifle before your feet ave pitie of me take my fword plongez dans my bofom Ah, larron ! perfide ! la, la, la, ra, ra. [HeJlngSy hieelS) and dances, by turns. Monfieur Artlie is not in my power bon ! but by gar, Madame, you know who is, hah ! Harriet. As for me, my fex protects me I am here, indeed, a prifoner and alone ; but yoa will not, you dare not, treat me with indignity. Champignon, 13^ The REPRISAL:' Champignon. Dare not ! ^Bravo -fliow to me de man vil fay I ctare not ca ^ha ^hah ! [Capers about. Harriet. You're in fuch a dancing humour, 'tis pity you lliould want mulic Shall I fing you a fong ? Champignon. Ah cruelle ! You gouveme wid foverain empire over my 'art ^you roufe me into one ftorm ^you fing me into one calm. SONG.. I. Let the nymph ftill avoid and be deaf to the fwain "Who in tranfports of paffion afife Maclaymore, Brusij, Toivj, HauLyard, ait EngHJJj Midjhipman. Champignon. Eh bien, Monfieur, que fouhait-U ? HAUI.YARD. Anan -JVIonfeer fweat-he ! Agad, I believe, if wrc come alongfide of you, we'll make you all fweat. Maclaymore. That's mair than you can tell, my lad ye may gar me fweet wi' fechting, but it's no in your breeks t gar me fweet wi' fear. QCLABBER. You may fwait me after I'm dead, honey- ^but, by the blefled virgin ! you fhall not fwait me aliveand fo you may be after delivering your meflage, gra. Paulyard. If it wa'ant for fuch as you that fhow your own coun- try the fore-top-fail, wold our enemy's cable, and man their quarters, they would never ride out the gale or dare to fhow their colours at fea But howfomever, we'll leave that bowling i' the block, as the faying is If fo be as hovtr that there Frenchman is commander of this here veflel, I have orders from my officer to demand an Englifh young woman, with all her baggage and thingiunbobs, that he took yefterday out of a pleafure- boat belonging to one Mr Heartly of Dorfetfhire, who flipped the painter this morning. ' ~ Cham-' I4J The REPRISAL; Champignon. Mardy ' de commiflion be ver percmptoirc ! Ecoute, raon ami, vat yQu call Monfieur your comman- darit? ' '\^ Haultard. I don't take in your palaver, not I and mayhap you don't know my lingo ; but, agad, we'll foon make you imdcrfland plain Englifh. - OCLABBER. Monfieur Champignon wants to know who is your commanding officer, honey. Haulyardu Who fhould it be but Lieutenant Lyon of the Triton man of war of fixty guns ? a> bold a heart as ever crack'd, bifcuit. Champignon. Bon ! fuppofe dat I refufe de command of Mon- fieur Lionne ? Haulyard. Suppofe ! if you do, he'll run you along-fide yard* arm and yard-arm, and blow you out of the water j that's all. .u,i(ir Champignon, By gar, be will find himfelf miftakcn : here is not vater for one fi^ty gun {]\\pfu4ftJe.J Heark you me, Monfieur vat is your name, tell Monfipur Lionne dat I am called Michel Sanfon Goluat de Champignon, Mar- quis de Vermifleau-^at I ave de honeur to ferve dc king; dat fear be one bagatelle of which I ave d? mepris dat I regard your ambalfade as de galimatias dat my courage fuffice to attack one whole Englis ef- efcadre and dat if Monfieur Lionne be difpofed to rendre moi un vifitc, I (hall have dc gloric to chaftifc his prefomption ;' fo I pcrn^ttc you go your way. Mac- A COMEDY. 143 Maclaymore. DiJJentio Bide you, billy^^therc's nae clerk here, I trow ^Weel, Lieutenant Oclabbcr, I talc inftruments in your haund againft the proceedings of Captain Cham- pignon, wha has incarcerate the Knglis leddy, contrair to the law of nature and nations. Now, cocky, ye may gang about your bulinefs ; when ye come b^ck, I'fe tkuk with you in another ftile. OCLABBF.R. ' , For my own part, honey, I fhall be after fhowing you , fome diverfiori in the way of my duty ; but I taake you to witnefs, that I have no hand in detaining the lady, who is pleafed to favour us with her company againft her own confeht, gra. Haulyard. Mayhap you may truft to your fhoal-water If yoii do, you're taken all aback, brother ; for Lieutenant Lyon commands a tender of twelve guns, and lifty ftout hands, that draws lefs than this here frigate by the ftreak; 'and -heti ! agad, yonder fhe comes round the point with a fiowing fail-^ b'w'ye, Morjieer Champignon ; all hands to quarters; up with your white rag; I doubt my officer and I will tafte foriie of your foiipmcagre by that time you pipe to dinner. \_E^it. S C E N E X. Champignon^ Oclabber, MaclaymorJ:, Brush. Champignon. Mbrt de ma vie ! je ne vous attendois pas fitot, i. Quelle cote faut il que je me tourne ? facrebleu ! Meffieurs^ I demand your confcil : you proteft againft . my 144 The REPRISAL : my conduite ; if you tink me ave done de injuftlcc, yon vil find me tout-3-fait raifonable ; we render Mademoi- felle to de Engl is ; for I juge it bien mal a-propos to en- gage de enemi, when de fpirit of contradiction reign a- mong ourfelves. DCLABEER. Faith and troth, my dear, the conb-ad'ction is all over ; you have nothing to do but to ftation your men ; arid as for Maclaymore and my own fhelf, the Englifh can- non may make our legs and arms play at Ibggerheads in the air, honey -, but we'll ftand by you for the glory of France, in fpite of the devil and all his works, gra. Maclaymore. Never fafh your noddle about me : GoriPcience, Ffc no be the firft to Cry barley. OCLABBER. Enfign Maclaymore, I order you to go and take pof^ feffion of the forecaftle with your divifion, honey. I Willi they may ftand fire till you're all knock'd o' the head, gra ; but Fm afraid they're no better than dunghills, for they were raifed from the CanaiHe of Paris. And now FU go and put the young lady below water, where Ihe may laugh in hef own fleeve, gra : for, if the fhip fhould be blown 'up in the engagement, fhe is no more than a pallenger you know ; and then Ihe'li be releafed without - ranfom. Brush. God blefs you. Captain Oclabber, for your generofity to my poor lady. I was ordered by my mafter to give her clofe attendance ; and though 1 have a great curio- fity to fee the battle, Mifs Harriet muft by no means be left alone. {Exeunt Oclabber^ Maclaymore , and Brujh. SCENE A COMEDY. t45 S e E N E XI. Champignon. / Ventre fakit-gris ! que ferai-je ? Je me fens tout eai- brouille ces autres Anglois font fi precipites ! que diable les etouffe. Allons ! Aux armes ! matelots mes enfans ! chardon chiffoii! ortie -fumier I'hi- bou la faim aliens ^vite, vite aux armes \ \_A crew of tatterdemallions running up and down the deck in canfufion the noife of cannon and mufquetry. Ah mon bon Dieu ! ayez pitie de moi encore qu'on m' apporte de I'eau de vie. Ah miferable pecheur I je fuis mort ! je fuis enterre I ah, voila aflez mes en- fans ceflez-wdefiftez il faut amener Monfieur, O- ' claw-bear Lieutenant 0-clayr-be mafler, this is a happy day ! {Exeunt Heartly and Brujh.^ SCENE ^ m :A m } A COMEDY. 147 SCENE XIV. OCLABBER, Ma CLAYMORE, Lieut. LyON, HaULYARD, Champignon, &c. OcLABBER, delivering hisfivord. Gentlemen, your's is the fortune of the day. You ught to be kind to us, for we have given you very lit- tle trouble. Our commander there is a very Ihivil perfon, gra ; he don't turft after the blood of his enemy. As for the foldiers, I fhall fay nothing ; but upon my fhoul, now, they're the nimbleft dead men I ever faw in the days of my life ! About two minutes ago they were lying like fo many flaughter'd fheep, and now they have all fcramper'd off about their bufinefs, , Maclaymore. As I fall anfwer, it's a black burning fhame ! and I hope the king will order them to be decimated, that is, every tenth nian to be hanged in terrorem. OcLABBER. By my falvation, if the king will take my advice, every fingle man of them Ihall be decimated. SCENE THE LAST. To them Heartly, leading in Harriet, HeARTLY, (embracing Oclahher and Maclaymore.) Gentlemen, I'm heartily glad of having an opportuni- ty to return, in fome meafure, the civilities you have dhown to this young lady. Mr I. yon, I beg you'll order their fwords to be reftored ; they were m no Ihape acr ecffary to our grievances. T % OcLABBER. t48 Thj: REPRISAL: OcLABBER, (receiving his fivord). Mr Lyon, you're extremely polite ; and I hope I fliall never die till I have an opportunity to return the com- pliment. Madam, I wifh you joy of your misfortune, with all my fhoul. Lyon. I an'f ufed to make fpeeches, Madam ; but I'm very glad it was in my power to ferve fuch a fine lady, efpeci- ally as my old fchool-fellow,Heartly, is fo much concern- ed in your delivcratice. As for this fair-weather fpark, Monfieur de Champignon, if he can't fhoW a commiflion, authorifing him to make depredations on the Englifh, I fhall order him to be hoifted up to the yard's arm by the neck as a pirate ; but if he can produce his orders, he fhall be treated as a prifoner of war, though not be- fore he has reftored what he pilfer'd from you and Mr Heartly. Harriet. At that rate I'm afraid I fhall lofe an admirer. You fee, Monfieur de Champignon, the old proverb fulfilled ; hanging and marriage go by defliny : yet I fhould be very forry to occafion even the death of a finner. Champignon. ^ladame, I implore your pitie and clemence ; Mon- fieur Artlie,- 1 am one pauvre miferable, not worth your revanche; [Etiter Block drunhy with a portmanteau on his Jhoulder-I Block. Thus and no nearer bear a hand, my hearts [Lays it downy opens it^ takes out and puts on a tanvdryfuit of Champignon^ s cloaths. By your leave, Tinfey Odds heart ! thefe braces are fo tort, I muft keep my yards fqusu-e, as the faying is. I^TON. A COMEDY. 149 >:,"' LtON. Ahsiy ! what the devil have we got here ? how now. Block ? Btocit. All's fair plund^i* between decks we haVt ItfOkc bulk, I'll aflure you ftand clear I'll foon overhaul the reft of the cargo. iPuI/s out a long leather queue with red ribbons. What's here ? the tiller of a monkey ! s'blood the fel- low has no more brains than a noddy, to leave the red ropes hanging over his ftern, whereby the enemy may board him on the poop. [T'he next thing that appears, is a very coarfe can- vasjhirt, with veryfint laced ruffles. This here is the right trim of a Frenchman all ginger- bread-work, fiourilh and compliment aloft, and all rags and rottennefs alow. \T)raws out a plume of feathers, Adzooks ! this is MoUnfeer's vane, that, like his fancy, veers with every puff to all the points of the compafs Hark'ee, Sam- the nob muft needs be damnably, liglrt that's rigg'd with fuch a deal of feather. The French are fo well fledg'd, no wonder they are fo ready to fly. \Finds a pocket-glafsy a paper of rouge and Spani/b ivooly ivith ivhich he daubs his face, 'Swing the fwivel-ey'd Ton of a whore ! he fights under falfe colours, like a pirate here's a lubberly dog, he dares not fhew his own face to the weather. Champignon. Ah ! Monfieur de Belokkc, ave compaffion Block. Don't be afraid, Frenchman ^you fee I have holfted your jacket, thof I ftruck your enfign we Engliflimen never cut throats in cold blood : the beft way of beat- ing ISO The REPRISAL. ing the French is to fpare all their Shampinions Odd's heart ! I wou'd all their commanders were of your trim, brother ; we'd foon have the French navy at Spithcad. Lyon. But, in the mean time, I fhall have you to the gang- way, you drunken fwab. Block. Swab ! I did fwab the forecaftle clear of the enemy, that I muft confefs. Lyon. None of your jaw, you lubber. Block. Lubber ! man and boy, twenty years in the fer\'icc ^lubber ! Ben Block was the man that taught thee, Tom Lyon, to hand, reef, and fteer fo much for the lervice of Old England j but, go thy ways, Ben, thy timbers are crazy, thy planks are ftaited, and thy bot- tom is foul : I have feen the day when thou would'ft have fhewn thy colours with the bcft o'un. Lyon. Peace, porpufs. Block. I am a porpufs ; for I fpout falt-watcr, d'ye fee ! I'll be Jamn'd if grief and forrow ha'n't fet my eye-pumps a going. Harriet. Come, Mr Block, I muft make you friends with lieu- tenant Lyon. As he has been your pupil, he muft be an able navigator ; and this is no time for our able fea- men to fall out among themfelves. Block, A COMEDY. r5. Block. Wliy, look ye here, miflrefs, I muft confefs as how he's as brilk a feaman as ever greas'd a marlin-fplke I'll turn 'um adrift with e'er a he that e'er reefed a fore- fail A will fetch up his leeway with a wet fail, as the faying is And as for my own part, d'ye fee, I have ftocd by him with niy blood and my heart ^and my Hver, in all weathers ^blow high ^blow low. Harriet. Well, I hope you'll live to fee and fail with him as aa Admiral. Block. I doubt I muft be hove down firft, keel out of the water, miftrefs, and be well fcrubbed, d'ye fee then a may go to fea when a wool, and hoift the Union flag. - Stand clear, John Frenchman ^the Royal So- vereign of England will ride triumphant over the waves, as the fong goes. Lyon. / And now for you, Monfieur Cliampignon. Champignon. Monileur Lionne, I ave not altogether contraditSled, but perhaps a little exceeded, my orders, which were to take one Englilh chaloupe for intelligence. Heartly. Well, I'm perfuaded Mr Lyon will not be very lev6rc in his fcrutiny ; and to fhow that we Englifhmen can forgive injuries, and fight without malice, give me your hand I can't part with my miftrefs ; but in other refpefts, I am Monfieur de Champignon's^ humble fer- vant. , Lton. i5 The REPRISAL: Lton. I was once taken by the French, who ufed me nobly. ^I'm a witnefs of their valour, and an inllance of their politenefs but there are Champignons in evij fer\ ice. While France ufes us like friends, we will re- turn their civilities j when Ihe breaks her treaties and grows infolent, vre will drub her over to lier good be- haviour ^Jack Haulyard, you have got a fong to the purpofe, that won't, I believe, be difagreeablc to the company. SONG. I. Behold, my brave Britons, the fair fprlnging gale ; Fill a bumper, and tofs off your glafles : Bufs and part with your frolicfome lafles ; Then aboard and mzfiirl the wide flowing fail. Chorus. >. While Britifh oak beneath us rolls. And Englifh courage fires oiu* fouls ; To crown our toils, the fate's decree The wealth and empire of the fea. n. Our canvr.s and cares to the winds we difplay, Lif and fortune we cheerfully venture -, And we laugh, and we quaff, and we banter ; Nor think of to-morrow while furc of to-day. Chorus. While Britifh oak, &c. ffl. A COMEDY. ^ III. The dreamers of France at a diftance appear j We rriuft mind other mufic than catches : Man our quarters and handle our matches ; Our cannon produce, and for battle prepare. Chorus. While Britifh oak, &c. IV. Engender'd in fmoke and deliver-'d in flame, / Britifh vengeance rolls loud as the thunder \ Let the vault of the fty burft afunder. So viftory follows with riches and fame. CnoRtrs, While Britifh oak, &c. Ij fPtiOGUM^ ijt4 The reprisal EPILOGUE. ^TE ' ' fhw lean ^vith pleafure look aroundy Safe as I anj, thank heavn ! on Engli/h grouni l ' ' /// a dark dufigeon to bejloiv^d anvay^ ^Mitljl roartngy thund'ringy danger y and difmay ; Exposed to fire and ivateryfivord and build Might damp t^ heart of any virgin pnlld I dread to thifik Hvhdt might have come topnfy Had not the BritiJJj Lion quelPd the Gallic Jfi * ' hy Champignon a wretched viBim led To cloijlerd celly or more detefied bedy My days in pray r and fa/ling I hddfpent ; As ftun Ot ivifiy alike a penitent^ His gallantry yfo confident and eager y Had prov'd a inafs of delicate fotip^maigre. To bootlefs longings IhadfiUlVn a martyr ; Bitty Heavn be prats' dy the Frenchnan caught a tartar i. Tetffi -.r authtr^s fate you niufi decree : ShtJl he comcfnfe topyrt or fink at fed ? fTour fentenceyfiveet or bitter, foft or fore, ,Fkats his fra\l barky or runs it butnp afijore. X^'^jii ahm^y -refhain your aitful thunder ; In hisfifl cruifey f were pity he fijOi.d founder. [To the Gall, Safe from thefijoty he fears ho(^herfoey A'.;- gulphy but that nvhich horrid yawns beloiv^ [To the Pit. The bravefi chiefs ^ e^n Hannibal and CatOy Have here been tam^dwi^h '" . p 'ppin and potatoe* Our A COMEDY. J 55 * Our bardembarh in a mare Chrlfiian cattfe : He craves not mercy ; but he claims applauje. His pen againjl the hoJl'\le French is draivn i JVho damns him, is tio Antigallican. Indulged ivith Jai} ring gales and fmilingjkiesy Hereafter he may board a richer prize. But if this welkin angry clouds deform^ [Ix)ol^ing round the Houfe. And hollow groans portend.the approachingflorm ; [To the Gall. Should the defcending fhcni^ rs of hail redouble y ^nd thefe rough billows hifsy and boil, and bubble ; [To the. ?^. ^e' II launch no mare onfiu:hfcllfec(S of trouble. P M M S. ADVICE Ai^D REPROOF^ TWO SATIRES. riKST PUBLISHED IN THE YEAR.S I746 & '1747* Sed podlce levi Ceeduntur tumidce medico ridente Marifctg.-^i-^^ ' " O Pt'octres ! cenfoVe opus eft an haru/pice nobis ? -r, JovEHidt*, ^- nom Quis <>-;< *)(> PeccandifineinpQfuttJthi?quqndorec^pit ' ^ j,y EjeBum fetnel attrita de^ronte ruhoremf"^"'"'"^ ' V" 1 D r I C Z.A Satire. P CET, Friend. , Poet. ENOUGH, enough ; all this we knw before i 'Tis infamous, I grant it, to be poor.: And who, fo much to fenfe and glory lofty "Will hug the curfe that not one joy can boaft ! From the pale hag, O ! could I once break loofe ; 5 Divorc'd, all hell fhall not retie the noofe ! J4ot with nlore care fhall H ^avoid his wife. Not Cope fiy fwifter, lafliing for his life. Than 1 to ieave the meagre fiend behind. Fhieni> 8. Not Copa fly fwifter.] A general famous for an Expeditious ritrcat, thougK aot quite fo deliberate as tliat o th^ i69 ADVICE, Friend. Exert your talents j nature, ever kin(f id Enough for h^fppinefs beftows on all ; *Tis floth or pride that finds her gifts too fmall. Why fleeps the mufe r-^-Is there no room for praife, "When fuch bright names in conftellation blaze ? "Wlien fagc Newcaftle> abftinently great, 1 5 Nfeglets his food to cater for the ftate ; ' And Grafton, tow'ring Atlas of the throne. So well rewards a genius like his own : Granville arid Bath illuftrious, need I name Toir fober dignity and fpotlefs fame ; 2 Or Pitt, th' Unlhaken Abdiel, yet unfung ; Thy candour, Cho'm'dly ! and thy truth, O Yoiinge ? , . ,PoET. Th' advice is good j the queftioti only, whether Thefe names and virtues ever dwelt together ? , But ihe ten tlioufan(J Greeks from Perfia 5 having unfortunate- ly forgot to take his army along with him. 15. When fage Newcaftle,&c.] Alluding to the philo^ fophlcal contempt which this great perfonage raanifeiled lot the fenfual delights oi the flolnach. 17, And Grafton, tow'ring Atlas of the throne, &c.J This noble peer, remarkable for fubliraity of parts, by virtue of his office, Lord Chamberlain, conferred the lau- reat on Colley Gibber, Efq. a delectable bard, whofe cha- racter has already employed, together with his own, the greateft pens of the age. 19. Granville and Bath, Sec.} Two noblemen famouis in their day for nothing more than their fortitude in bear* Jog the fcorn and reproach of their country. 21. Or Pitt, th' unfhaken Abdiel, &c.J Abdiel, ac- cordingf A SATIRE. i6s But what of that ? the more tlie bard fliall claim, 25 Who can create as well as cherifli fame. But one thing more how loud muft I repeat. To rouze th'engag'd attention of the great, Amus'd, perhaps, with C 's prolitic bum. Or wrapt amidft the tranfports of a drum ; 3 While the grim porter watches ev'ry door. Stern foe to tradefmen, poets, and the poor : Th' Hefperian dragon not more fierce and fell. Nor the gaunt growling janitor of helL Ev'n Atticus (fo wills the voice of fate) 35 Infhrines in clouded majefly his fbate ; Nor to th' adoring croud vouchfafes regard, Though priefts adore, and eVry prieft a bard. Shall I then follow with the venal tribe. And on the threfliold the bafe mongrel bribe ? 40 Bribe him to feaft my mute-imploring eye With fome proud lord, who fmiles a gracious lie ! X A cording to Milton, was tlie only ferapli that pieferved his ijitegrity in the midft of corruption Among the innumerable falfe, unmov'd, Unfhaken, unfeduc'd, unterrify'd 29. Amus'd perhaps, with C 's prolific bum.] This alludes to a phenomenon not more fti;ange than true the perfon here meant having actually laid upwards of forty eggs, as feveral phyficiahs and fellows- of the Royal Socie- ty can atteft j one of whom, we hear, has undertaken the incubation, and will, no doubt, favour the world with an account of his fuccefs. Some virtuofi affirm, that fuch producElions muft be the cfFeft of a certain intercourfe of organs not fit to be named, 30.' Tranfports of a drum.] This is a riotous affeinbly of fafhionable people, of both fexes, at a private houfe, confifting of fome hundreds, not unaptly Ililed a drum, from the noife and eraptinefs of the entertainment. I'here are alfo a drum-major, rout, tempeft, and hurricane, dif- fering only in degrees of multitude and uproar, as the fig- nificant name of each declares. i62 - ADVICE, A^ lie to captivate my heedlefs youth, Degrade my talents, and debauch my truth ; "While, fool'd with hope, revolves my joylefs day, 45^ And friends, and fame, a'ld fortune fleet away j Till fcandal, indigence, and fcorq, my lot, The dreary jail entombs me, where I rot ! Is there, ye varnifh'd ruffians of the ftate ! Not one, among the millions whom ye cheat, j* Who, while he totters on the brink of woe. Dares, ere he falls, attempt th' avenging blow ? iV fteady blow ! his languid foul to feaft And rid his country of one? curfe at leaft ! Friend. What ! turn affaffin ?. Poet. Let th' affaffin bleed*: 55 My fearlefs vcrfe fhall juftify the deed. ' 'Tis he, who lures th' unpracHs'd mind aftray. Then leaves the wretch to mifcry a prey j Perverts the race of virtue juft begun. And ftabs the public in her ruin'd fon. 6d Friend. Heav'ns, how you rail 1 the man's conftimM by fpite I If I^ckman's fate attends you, when you write. Let prudence more propitious arts infpire ; The lower ftill you crawl, you'll climb the higher. Go then, with ev'ry fupple virtue ftor'd, 65 And thrive the favoured valet of my lord. Is that denied ? a boon more humble crave, And minifter to liim who ferves a flave : , * ' Be 62. Lockman's fate. J To be little read, and lefs ap- proved. A SATIRE. 163 Be fure you faflen on promotion's fcale, Ev'n if you feize fome footman by the tail ; 70 Th' afcent 13 cafy, and the profpeft clear, From the fmirch'd fcuUion to th' embroiUer'd peer. Th' ambitious drudge preferr'd, poftillion rides, Advanc'd again, the chair benighted guides ; Here doom'd, if nature ftrung his finewy frame, 75 The flave (perhaps) of fome infatiate dame ; But if exempted from th' Herculean toil, A fairer field awaits him rich with fpoil ; There fhall he fliine, with mingling honours bright, His mafter's pathic, pimp, and parafite ; ^6 Then ftrut a captain, if his wifh be War, And grafp, in hope, a trmicheon and a ftar : Cr, if the fweets of peace his foiil allure, Bafk at his eafe in fome warm llnecure ; His fate in conful, clerk, or agent, vary, 8 j Or crofs the feas, an envoy's fecretary : Compos'd of falfehood, ignorance, and pride, A proftrate fycophant fliall rife a L d ; And won from' kennels to th' impure embracei Accomplilli'd Warren triumph o'er difgrace. po Poet. Eternal infamy his name furround. Who planted firft that vice on Britifh, ground A vied that 'fpite of fenfe and nature reigns, X 2 And 88. A proftrate fycophant (kail rife a L d.] Thi>- child of dirt (to ufe a great author's expreflion"), without any other quality thin grovelling adulation, has arrived at the power ol infulting his betters every day. 90. Accomplifh'd Warren.] Another foh of fortune, who owes his prefent affluence to the moft infamous quali- fications ; commonly called Bruih Warren, from having been a fiioe black. It vt faid tie was kept by both fexes at one time. i64 ADVICE.. And poifons genial love, and manhood ftains ! Pollio ! the pride of fcience and its (hame, p^ The mufe weeps o'er thee, while fhe brands thy name ! Abhorrent views that proftituted groom, Th' indecent grotto, and polluted dome ! There only may the fpurious paffion glow, Where not one laurel decks the caitili^'s brow, loo Obfcene with crimes avow'd, of ev'ry dye. Corruption, luft, oppreffion, perjury : Let Chardin, with a chaplet round his head, The tafte of Maro and Anacreon plead ; *' Sir, Flaccus knew to live as well as write, loj And kept like me two boys array'd in white." Worthy to feel that appetence of fame Which rivals Horace only in his fhame ! Let Ifis wail in murmiu-s, as fhe runs. Her tempting fathers and her yielding fons ; no While DuUnefs fcreens the failings of the church. Nor leaves one Aiding rabbi in the lurch : Far other raptures kt the breaft contain. Where heav'n-born tafte and emulation reign. Frienh. 103. Let Chardin, with a chaplet round his head] This genial knight wore at his banquet a garland of Howcrs in imitation of the ancients ; and kept two rofy boys rob- ed in white, for the entertainment of his guefls. icp. Let Ifis wail in murmuis as flie runs, &c.j In allufion to the unnatural orgies faid to be folemnized on the banks of this river ; particularly at one place, where a much greater fandlity of morals and t:ille might be ex- pcftcd. I IX. While duUnefs fcreens, &c.] 'Tliis is a decent and parental ofliee, in which dullnefs is employed j name- ly, to conceal the failings of her children ; and exadlly conformable to that inftancc of filial piety which we meet with in the fon of Noah, who went backward to cover the nakedncfs of his father, when l>e lay expofed , from the feoffs and infults of a malicious world. A SATiRi:^ 1t6s- Friend. Sh^U not a thoufand virtues then atone 115 in thy ftridt cenfure for the breach of one ? If Bubo keeps a catamite or whore, His bounty feeds the beggar at his door : And though no mortal credits Curio's word, A fcore of lacquies fatten at his board : 126 To chriftian meeknefs facritice thy fpleen. And llrive thy neighbour's v.xaknefles to fcreen. Poet. Scom'd be the bard, and wither'd all his fame, Who wounds a brother weeping o'er his fhame ! But if an impious wretch, with frantic pride, 125 Throws honour, truth, and decency afide. If nor by reafon aw'd, nor check'd by fears. He counts his glories from the ftains he bears j Th' indignant mufs to virtue's aid fliall rife. And fix the brand of infamy on vicfc. 1 30 Wha^ if arous'd at his imperious call, An hundred footfteps echo through his hall ; And on high columns rear'd his lofty dome Proclaims th' united art of Greece and Rom.e : What though whole hecatombs his crew regale 135; And each dej^endant flumbers o'er his alf ; While the remains through mouths unnumber'd pafb. Indulge the beggal- and the dogs at laft : Say, friend, is it benevolence of foul. Or pompous vanity, that prompts the whole ? 14C5 Thefe fons of floth, who' by profufion thrive. His pride invieglcd from the public hive : And nunibers pine in folitary woe. Who furnifh'd out this phantacy of fhow. When lilcnt milcry affail'd his eyes, 145 Did e'er his throbbing bofom fvmpathize ? Or i66 ADVICE. Or his extenfive charity pervade To thofe who languifli in the barren fliade, Where oft by want and modefty fupprefs'd The bootlefs talent warms the lonely. breaft ? I j No ! petrify'd by dulljiefs and difdain, Beyond the feeling of another's pain, The tear of pity ne'er bedew'd his eye, Nor his lewd bofom felt the fecial figh ! . ' Frienr: Alike to thee his virtue or his vice, 15^ If his hand lib'ral owns thy merit's price. Poet. Sooner in hopelefs anguifli would I mourn. Than owe my fortune to the man I fcorn ! <, What new refourtc ? .Friend. A thoufand yet remain, That bloom with honours, or that teem with gain : 1 5o Thefe arts, av{> they beneath beyond thy care ? Devote tiiy fcudies to th' aufpicious fair : Of truth .divefted, let thy tongue fupply The hinted flander, and the whifper'd lit ; All merit mock, all qualities deprefs, 16^ Save thofe that grace th' excelling patronefs j Trophies to her, on others' follies raifo, And heard with joy by defamation praife : To this colledl each faculty of face. And ev'ry feat perform of fly grimace } 1 76'. Let the grave fneer farcaftic f^^ak the fhrewd. The fmutty joke ridiculoufly lewd ; And the loud laugh through all its changes rung, Applaud th' abortive fallies of her tongue : Enroll'd a member in the fucrcd lift, 175 Soon A SATIRE. X67 Ijoon fhalt thou fharp in company, at whift ; Her midnight rites and revels regulate, Prieft of her love, and daemon of her hate. Poet. But fay, what recompenfe for all this wafte Of honour, truth, attention, time, and tafte ? 18 To Ihine confefs'd, her^any and her tool. And fall by what I rofe, low ridicule ? Again fhall Handel raife his laurel'd brow. Again fhall harmony with rapture glow ! The fpells diflblve, the combination breaks, " 185 And Punch no longer Frafi's rival fqueaks. Lo, Ruflel falls a facrifice to wliim. And ftarts amaz'd in Newgate from his dream : With trembling hands implores their promis'd aid ; V. ;) And 177. Her midnight rites &c.] Thefe are myfieries performed, like thofe of the Dea Bqtia, by females only j ponfequently it cannot be expedled that tve fhould here f xplain thetn : We have, notwithftanding found means to learn fome anecdotes concerning them, which we (hall re fsrve for another opportunity. 187. Lo, Ruflel falls, &.c.] A famous mimic and Ang- er. The perfon here meant, by the qualifications above defcribed, had infinuated himfelf into the confidence of certain ladies of quality, who engaged him to fet up a pup- pet fhew, in oppofition to the oratorios of Handel, againft whom they were unreafonably prejudiced. JBut the town not feconding the capricious undertaking, they defeated their manager, whom they had promifed to fupport, and let him fink under the expence they had entailed upon him : He was accordingly thrown into prifon, w^hcre his difappointment got the better of his reafon, and he re- mained in all the extacy of defpair j till at lall his gene- rous patroneffes. after much folicitation, were prevailed upon to collel five pounds, on the payment of which he lyas admitted into Bedlam, where he continued bereft of his undei"ftanding, and died in the utmoft mifery. i6 AD\aCE, And fees their favour like a vifion fade ! jpck Is this, ye faithlefs Syrens ! ^this the joy To which your fmiles th' unwary wretch decoy ? Naked and fhackled, on the pavement prone, His mangled flefh devouring from the bone ; ,Rage in his heart, diftraclion in his eye 1 195 Behold, inhuman hags ! your minion lie : Behold his gay career to ruin run. By you feduc'd, abandon'd and undone ! Rather in garret pent, fecure from harm. My mufe with murders fhall the town alarm ; 2oq Or plunge in politics with patriot zeal. And fnarl like Guthrie for the public weal. Than crawl an infeft, in a bedame's power. And dread the crufh of caprice ev'ry hour 1 Friend, 'Tis well ; enjoy that petulance of ftyle, 205 And, like the envious adder, lick the file : What though fuccefs will not attend on all ! Who bravely dares, mull: fometimes rifle a fall. Behold the bounteous board of Fortune fpread ; Each weaknefs, vice, and folly yields thee bread ; 210 Wouldft thou with prudent condfcenfioa ftrive; On the long fettled terms of life to thrive. Poet. What I join the crew that pilfer one another, Betray my friend and perfecute my brother : Tunv 199. Rather in garret, &c.] Thefe are the dreams and fiflions of Grub-llreet with which the good people of this metropolis are daily alarmed and entertained. 206. And, like the envious adder, lick the file.] Thi alludes to the fable of the viper and file, applicable to alt the unfuccefsful efforts of malice and envy. A SATIRE. 169 Turn ufurer, o'er cent, per cent, to brood, 215 Or quack, tp feed like fleas on human blood ? Friend. Or if thy foul can brook the gilded curfe. Some changeling heirefs ftea l Poet. "Why not a purfe I Two things I dread, my confcicnce and the law. Friend. " - '*''' - How ? dread a mumbling bear without a claw t '220 Nor this nor that is ftandard right or wrong, 'Till minted by the mercenary tongue. And what is confcience, but a fiend of ftrife, That chills the joys, and damps the fchemes of life ? The wayward child of vanity and fear, 225 The peevilh dam of poverty and care : Unnumber*d woes engender in the breaft That entertains the rude ungrateful gueft. Poet. Hail, {acred poVr I my glory and my guide \ Fair fource of mental peace, whate'er betidfe j 230 Safe in thy Ihelter, let difafter roll Eternal hurricanes around my foul ; My foul ferene amidft the ftorms fhall reign, And fmile t,o fee their fury burft in vain ! Friend. * Too coy to flatter, and too proud to ferye, 235 Thine be the joylefs dignity to ftarye. T Poet. * This, furely, occafioned Churchill's ** Too proud to flatter, too fincere to lie,'? i^o ADVICE, Poet. No ; thanks to difcord, war fhall be my friend j And mortal rage, heroic courage lend To pierce the gleaming fquadron of the foe, > And win renown by fome diftinguifh'd blow. 240 Friend. Renown ! ay, do unkennel the whole pack Of military cowards on thy back. What difference, fay, 'twixt him who bravely flood. And him who fought the bofom of the wood ? Invenom'd calunmy the firft fhall brand, 245 The lafl enjoy a ribbon and command. Poet. If fuch be life, its wretches I deplore, And long to quit th' inhofpitable fhore, REPROOF 248. What dIflFerence, fay, 'twIxt him who bravely flood, And him who fought the bofom of the wood ?] Thi^ lafl line relates to the behaviour of a general on a certain occafion, who difcovered an extreme paffion for the cool (hade during the heat of the day : the Hanoverian genCr ral, ia the battle of Dettingen. REPROOF: A S A T I R E. Poet, Friend. Poet. HOWE'ER I turn, or wherefoe'er I tread. This giddy world ftill rattles round my head f I pant for filence ev'n in this retreat Good heav'n ! what daemon thunders at the gate ? Friend. In vain you ftrive in this fequefter'd nook, 5 To fhroud ydu from an injur'd friend's rebuke. Poet. An injur'd friend ! who challenges the name ? If you, what title juftifies the claim ? Did e'er your heart o'er my aflliftion grieve. Your int'reft prop me, or your purfe relieve ? 10 Or could my wants my foul fo far fubdue. That in diftrefs fhe crawl'd for help to you ? But let us grant th' indulgence e'er fo ftrong ; Difplay without referve th' imagin'd wrong t Among your kindred have I kindled ftrife, 15 Deflow'r'd your daughter, or debauch'd your wife ; Traduc'd your credit, bubbled you at game ; Or foil'd with infamous reproach your nsraie ? Y 2 Friend. 172 REPROOF, Friend. No ; but your cynic vanity (you'll own) Expos'd my private counfel to the town. 2# PoT. Such fair advice 'twere pity fure to lofe ; I grant I printed it for public ufe. Friend. Yes, feafon'd with your own remarks between, Inflam'd with fo much virulence of fpleen. That the mild town (to give the dev'l his due) 25 . Afcrib'd the whole perfonnance to a Jew. Poet. Jews, Turks,. Pagans, hallowed be the mouth That teems with moral zeal and dauntlefs truth ! Prove that my partial ftrain adopts one lie. No penitent more mortify'd than I ; S'^ - Not ev'n the wretch in fliackles, doom'd to groan Beneath th' inhuman feoffs of WilUamfon *. TlUCND. Hold 4et us fee this bbafted felf-denial The vanquifh'd knight has triumphed in his trial f . Poet. What then ? Friend. Tour own farcaftic verfjs unfay, 35 That brands him as a tremming runaway* PoBf. * Governor of thq Tower. f Sir John Cope. A SATIRE, 173 Poet. With all my foul ! th' imputed charge rehearfe j I'll own my error and expunge the verfe. Come, come howe'er the day was loft or won, The world allows the race was fairly run: 40' But, left the truth too ilaked fhould appear, A robe of fable fhall the goddefs wear : When fheep were fubjecfl to the lion's reign. Ere man acquir'd dominion o'er the plain. Voracious wolves fierce ruihing from the rocks, 45 Devour'd without controul th' unguarded flocks : Thefuff'rers crouding round the royal cave. Their monarch's pity and protection crave. Not that they wanted valour, force, or arms, To Ihield their lambs from danger and alarms j 50 A thoufand rams the champions of the fold. In ftrength of horn, and patriot virtue bold, Engag'd in firm afibciation, ftood Their lives devoted to the public good : A warlike chieftain was their fole requeft, 55 To marfhal, guide, inftrui, and rule the reft : Their pray'r was heard, and, by confent of all, A courtier ape appointed general. He went, he led, arrang'd the battle ftood. The favage foe came pouring like a flood^ j 60 Then pug aghaft, fled fwifter than the wind. Nor deign'd, in threefcore miles, to look behind i While ev'ry band for orders bleat in vain. And fall in flaughter'd heaps upon the plain : The fcar'd baboon (to cut the matter fliort) 6^ With all his fpeed could not out-run report ; And, to appeafe the clamours of the nation, *Twas fit his cafe ftiould ftand examination. The board was named each worthy took his place j A X74 - REPROOli', All fenlor members of the horned race. 70 The wedder, goat, ram, elk, and ox were there. And a grave hoary flag pofTefs'd the chair* Th' inquiry paft, each in his turn began The culprit's conduct varioufly to fcan. At length thefage uprear'd his awful crefl, 75 And paufing, thus his fellow chiefs addrefs'd : If age, that from this head its honours ftole. Hath not impair'd the functions of my foiil, But fiicred wifdom with experience bought, While this weak frame decays, matures my thought ; 80 Th' important iflue of this grand debate May furniflx precedent for your own fate '^ Should ever fortune call you to repel The fhaggy foe, fo defperate and fell : 'Tis plain, you fay, his excellence Sir Ape 85 From the dire field accomplifh'd an efcape *, Alas ! our fellow-fubje Adorn each private feaft and public ball ; 140. Where peers attentive liften arid adore. And riot one matron fhuns the titled -rt-hbr^; At Peter's obfequies I fung no dirge ; Nor has my fatire yet fupply'd a fcourge For the vile tribes of ufurel-s and bites, t45 Who fneak at Jonathan's and fwear at White's* Each low purfuit, and flighter folly bred Withui the felfifh heart and hollow head. Thrives uncontroul'd, and bloflbms o'er the laftd, Nor feels the rigour of my chaft'ning hand : 150 While Codrus ihivers o'er his bags of gold. By famine wither'd, arid benumb'd by cold ; I mark his haggard eyes with frenzy roll. And feaft upori the terrors of his foul j The wrecks of war, the pe;rils of the deep, ^55 That curfe with hideous dreams the caitiff's fleep ; Infolvent debtors, thieves, and civil ftrife, Which daily perfecute his wretched life ; With all the hon'ors of prophetic dread. That rack his bofom while the mail is read. 160 Safe from the road, untainted by the fchoolj A judge by birth, by deftiny a fbolj ; , " - - 2 While the young lordling flruts in rfjttiVe pfiafe. His party-coloured tutor by his fide, Z : PleasM, 139. The leenng belle.] A wit of the firft water, ce- lebrated for her talent of repartee and, double entendre. 143. Peter's obfequies.] Peter Waters, Efq. whole character is too well known to need defcription. 164. His party-coloured tutor.] Whether it be for the reafon affigned in the fubfcquent lines, or the fruga- lity of the parents, who are unwilling to throw aWay mo- 178 REPROOF, Pleas'4> let me own the pious mother's care, 165 Who to the brawny fire commits her heir. Fraught with the fpirit of a Gothic monk. Let Rich, with dulnefs and devotion drunk, Enjoy the peal Co barb'rous and fo loud, While his brain fpues new monfters to the croud ; 170 I fee with joy the vaticide deplore An hell-denouncing prieft and fov'reign whore. Let ev'ry polifh'd dame, and genial lord Employ the fecial chair, and venal board ; Debauch'd from fenfe, let doubtful meanings run, 175 The vague conundrum and the prurient pun ; While the vain fop, with apifh grin, regards The ncy in making their children wifer than themfelves, I know not ; but certain it is, that many people of fafhioa commit the education of their heirs to fome trufty foot- man, with a particular command to keep mafter out of the ftable. I 170. Spues new monfters to the croud.] Monfters of abfurdity. " He look'd, and faw a fable forc'rer life, ** Swift to whofe hand a winged volume flies j *' All fudden, gorgons hifs, and dragons glare, ** And ten-horn'd fiends and giants rufti to war, *' Hell rifes, heaven defcends, and dance on earth, *' Gods, imps, and monfters, mufic, rage, and mirth, " A fire, a jig, a battle, and a ball, * Till one wide conflagration fwallows all." DUNCIAD. 174. Employ the focial chair.] This is no other than , au empty chair, carried about with great fgrmality, to perform vifits, by the help of whit h a decent correfpon- dence is often maintained among people of faftiion, many years together, without one perfonal interview j to the great honour of hofpitality and good neighbourhood. 174, Venal board.] Equally applicable to the dining and card-table, where every gueft muft pay an extrava- gant price for what he has. A SATIRE 179 Th^ gigling minx half choak'd behind her cards : Thefe, and a thoufand idle pranks, I deem llie motly fpawn of ignorance and whim. 180 Let pride conceive and folly propagate. The fafliion ftill adopts the fpurious brat : Nothing fo ftrange that fafhion cannot tame ; . By this difhonour ceafes to be fhame : This weans from blulhes lewd Tyrawley's face, 1 85 Gives Hawley praifc and Ingolfby difgrace ; From Mead to Thompfon fhifts the palm at once, A meddling, prating, blund'ring, bufy dunce ' And may (fhould tafte a little more decline) Transform the nation to an herd of fwine. 190 Friend. The fatal period haftens on apace ! Nor will thy verfe th' obfcene event difgrace ; Thy flow'rs of poetry, that fmell fo ftrong. The keeneft appetites have loath'd the fong ; Condemn'd by Clark, Banks, Barrowby, and Chitty, 195 And all the crop-ear'd critics of the city : While fagely neutral fits th> fllent friend, Alike averfe to cenfure or commend. Poet. Peace to the gentle foul that could deny His invocated voice to fill the cry ! 200 And let me ftill the fentiment difdain 186. Hawley praife.] A general fo renowned for con- duel and difcipline, that, during an aftion in which he had a confiderable command, he is faid to have been fecn tal- lying three fugitive dragoons, five miles from the field of battle. 19$. Clark, Banks, Barrowby, Chitty.] A fraternity of wits, whofe virtue, modcfty, and tafte, are xnuch of the ffcme dimccfion. i8o POEMS. Of him, who never fpeaks hot to arraign ; The fneering fon of calumny and fcom, "Whom neither arts, nor fenfe, nor foul adofn : Or his, who to maintain a critic's rank, 205 The' confcious of his own internal blank, His want of tafte, unwilling to betray, 'Twixt fenfe and nonfenfe hefitates all d^y i With brow contrailed hears each paflage read. And often hums and fhakes his empty hpa,d } '^}% Until fome oracle ador'd, pronounce The paffive bard a poet or a dunce ^ , ^ _p,^. Then in loud clamour echoes back the word, 'Tis bold ! infipid foaring or abfurd. Thefe, and th' unnumber'd fhoals of fmaller fry, 215 That nibble round, I pity and defy. THE TEARS OF SCOTLAND. lyRITT^N IN THi: TEAR 1 746, I. M^ ,OURN, haplefs Caledonia, mourn Thy banifh'd peace, thy laurels torn ! Thy fons for valour long renown'd. Lie flaughter'd on their native ground ; Thy hofpitable roofs no more. Invite the ftranger to the door ; In fmoky ruins funk they lie. The monuments of cruelty. n. The wretched owner fees afar His all become the prey of war ; Bethinks him of his babes and wife, Then fmitcs his breafl, and curfes li&. Thy POEMS, l8l Thy fwains are famifh'd on the rocks, Where once they fed their wanton flocks j Thy ravifli'd virgins ihriek in vain j Thy infants perilh on ftt^ Blai%. '.; nl Till i?:aiQri;;.'' What boots it then, in every 'clime, "* ^f-wti^'to ^iataH Through the wide fpreading wafte of timc^ '^ *^'jnr os~* Thy martial glory, crown'd with praife, '*^ -^ Still flione with undiminifh'd blaze ? . ' Thy tow'ring fpirit now is broke, Thy neck is bended to the yoke* What foreign arms could never quellv - ^ .^ .. =. - J3y cavil rage, and rancour teli. , . . The rural pipe and merry lay No more fliall cheer- the happy day : No focial fcenes of gay delight Beguile the dreary winter night : No ftrains but thofe of forrow flow. And nought be heard but fovjnds of woe, While the pale phantoms of the flain Glide nightly o'er the filent plain, - v,^ I P baneful caufe, oh ! fatal morn, J^ccurs'd to ages yet unborn ! The fons againft their fathers flood, The parent Ihed his children's blood. Yet, when the rage of battle ceas'd. The vigor's foul was not appeas'd ; The naked and forlorn muft feci Devouring flames, and murd'ring fteel ! 182 POEMS. ~ ; ; . VI. The pious mother, doom'd to death, /i Forfakcn, wanders o'er the heath, The bleak wind whiftles round her head. Her helplefs orphans cry for bread ; Bereft of ihelter, food, and friend, She views the ihades of night defcend j And ftretch'd beneath the inclement (kies, Weeps o'er her tender babes, and dies. VII. While the warm blood bedews my veins, " And unimpair'd remembrance reigns, R efentment of my country's fate, - Within my filial breaft ftiall beat ; _^ And, fpite of her inflilting foe. My fympathizing verfe fhall flow . ** Mourn, haplefs Caledonia, mourn <-^. ** Thy banifh'd pe^ce, thy laurels torn.'? '*: SONG. I. 3 O lix her 'twere a taflc as vain To count the April drops of rain. To fow in Afric's barren foil, i Or tempefta hold within a toil. II. ' I know it, friend, Ihe's light as air, Falfe as the fowler's artful fnare ; Inconftant as the paffing wind. As winter's dreary froft unkind. III. POEMS. 183 III. She's fuch a mifer too in love, Its joys fhe'U neither fhare nor prove j Though hundreds of gallants await From her victorious eyes their fate. IV. Blufhing at fuch inglorious reign, I fometimes ftrive to break her chain ; My reafon fummon to my aid, Refolv'd no more to be betray'd. V. ^ Ah ! friend, 'tis but a fhort liv'd trance, Difpell'd by one enchanting glance ; She need but look, and, I confefs, Thofe loc^s completely curfe or blefs. III. So foft, fo elegant, fo fair, / Sure fomething more than human's there ; I muft fubmit, for ftrife is vain, 'Twas deftiny that forg'd the chain. BURLESQUE ODE *. V V HERE waft thou, wktol ward, when haplefs fate From thefe weak arms mine aged grannam tore : Thefe pious arms eflay'd too late. To drive the difmal phantom from the door. * Smollet, imagining himfelf ill treated by Lord Lyt- tleton, w::ote the above burlefque on that nobleman's Mo- nody on the death of his ladv. i84 tOtUS Could not thy healing drop, illuftrlous quack, Could not thy falutary pill prolong her days ; For whom, fo oft, to Marybone, alack ! Thy forrels dragg'd thee through the \\'crft of ^vay ! Oil-dropping Twick'nham did not then detain, Thy fteps, though tended by the Cambrian maids Nor the fweet environs df Drury-lane ; Nor dufty Pimlico's embow'ring fliades. ; . Nor Whitehall, by the river's bank, Befet with rowers dank ; Nor where th' Exchange pours forth Its tawny fons ; Nor where to mix with offal, foil, and blood, Steep Snow-hill rolls the fable flood ; Nor where the Mint's contaminated kennel runs : 111 doth it now bcfeem^, - . That thou fhould'ft doze ^nd dream^ When death in mortal armour came, And flruck with ruthlefs dart the gentle dame. Her fib'ral hand and fympathing breaft. The brute creation kindly blefs'd : Where'er flie trod grimalkin purr'd around. The fqueaking pigs her bounty own'd ; Nor to the waddling duck of gabbling goofe. Did flie glad fuftenance refufe ; The ftrutting cock flie daily fed. And turky with his fnout fo red ; Of chickens careful as the pious lien. Nor did fhe overlook the tomtit or the ^v^en ; While redbrcaft hoprp'd before her in the hall. As if /he common mother were of all. Tor my diftrafled mind. What comfort can I find ; O beft of grannams tl-vou art dead and gone^ And I am left behind to weep and jnoan, To POEMS. 185 *""' ii To fing tfiy dirge in fa J funereal lay, Dh ! woe is me ! alack j and well-a-day ! ODE TO MIRTH. JL ARENT of joy ! heart-eafing Mihh ! Whether of Venus or Aurora born j Yet goddefs fure of heAvenly birth, Vifit benign a fori of grief forlorn : Thy glittering colours gay, Around him, Mirth ! difplay t And o'er his raptur'd fenfe Diftufe thy living influence : So {hall each hill in purer green array'd^ And flower adorn 'd in new-born beauty glow. The grov'j fliall fmooth the horrors of the fllade. And ftreams in murmurs ftiall forget to flow. Shin.'*, Goddefs, ihine with unremitted ray, And gild (a fecond fun) with brighter beand our day. Labour with thee forgets his pain. And aged poverty can fmile with thee. If thou be nigh, grief's hate is vain. And weak the Uplifted ,arm of tyrannyi The morning opes on high His univerfal eye j And on the world doth pOUi* His glories in a golden Ihower. Lo ! darknefs trembling 'fore the hoftile fay Shrinks to the cavern deep and wood forlorn : ' The brood obfcene, that own her gloomy fway, Troop in her rear and fly th' approach of morn. t*ale fhivering ghofts, that dread th' all-cheering lights Quick, as the lightning's flafli, glide to fcpulcHtd night* ^ut whence the gladening iDfeam That pours his purple ftream A a O'er tu roEMs: O'er the long profpe6l w Ide ? - v *Ti9 Mirth. I lee her iit In majcfty of light, With laughter at her iide. Bright-ey'd fancy hovering near Wide waVcS her glancing wing in air ; 'And young wit flings his pointed dart, That guiltlefs ftrikes the willing heart. Fear not now affiiction's poMvef, Fear not now wild paflion's ragCj Nor fear ye aught in evil hou^. Save the tardy hand of age. Now Mirth hath heard the fuppliant poet's prayer. No cloud that iverc baptized with blood ! . Antistropiie. The Saxon prince in horror fled From altars ftain'J with human gore y And liberty his rooted legions led In fafety to. the bleak Norwegian fliorc. 20 There j6. Baptiz'd with blood.] Cliarlema^e obliged four thoufand Saxon prifoners to embrace the Cbrlftian reli- gion, and immediately after they were baptized, ordered their throats to be cut. Their Prince Yitikind fled fct f!jej,ter to Gotrick, King of Denmark. POEMS. H9 There in a cave afiecp flie lav, Luircd by the hoarfe-refounding main} W'hen a bold favage paft that way, Tmpeird by deftiny, his name Difdain. Of ample front the portly chief appear'd : 35 The hunted bear fup^iy'd a ftiaggy veft ; The drifted fnow hung on his yellow beard ; And his broad fhoulderS brav'd the furious blaft. He ftopt : he gaz'd ; his bofom glow'd, And deeply fek the impreffion of her chirms : 2^ lie feiz'd the advantage fate allow'd, : ' ^Jtid ftraight cQ^iprefled her ii^ his vigorous arms. Strophe. The curlieu fcream'd, the Tritons blew Their fhells to 'celebrate the ravifli'd rite i Old time exulted as he flew ; 35 And Independence faw the light. The light he faw in Albion's happy plains, Where under cover of a flowering thorn, While Philornel renewed her warbled ftrains. The aufpicious fruit of ftol'n e^iibrace was boi-n - 40 The mountain dryads feized with joy. The fmiling infant to their charge confign'dj The Doric mufe carefs'd the favourite boy : T]ae hermit wifdom ftqr'd his opening mind. As rolling years matured his a^e, i| ! rftl JOV t)').^r^ CONTENTS Of V u I. C'HAP. t. COME fage obfervations- that naturally introduce our important hiftory, . . - Page 7 C H A P. II. A fupcrficial view of our hero's infancy, ! XI CHAP. III. He is initiated in a military life, and has the good fortune to acquire a generous patron, - . - I4 C H A P. IV. His mother's prowefs and death ; together with fome inftanceft of his * own fagaeity, - - - I7 CHAP. V. A brief detail of his Education, - - * 3* CHAP. VI. He meditates fchemes of importance, - - a8 CHAP. VII. Engages in partncrlhip with a female aCTociate, in order to put his ta- lents in adion, - - - 34 CHAP. VIII. Their firfl attempt ; with a digreffion which fome Readers may thinfc impertinent, - - - 37 CFTAP. IX. The confederates change their battery ; and atchieve a remarkable ad- venture, - - - - 4* CHAP. X. They proceed to levy contributions with greaC fuccefs, until our hero Vo. I. t ^ few ii CONTENTS or VOL. I. fets out with the young count for Vienna, where he enter* into league with another adventurer, - - P. 46 CHAP. XL .Fathom makes various efforts in the world of gallantry, 50 CHAP. XII. He efieiSs a lodgement in the houfe of a rich Jeweller, - 54 CHAP XIII. He is expofcd to a mod pefilous incident, in the courfcofhis intrigue with the daughter, -' _ . 5*) CHAP. XIV. He is reduced to a dreadful dilemma, in confcquence cf an affignatioB with the wife, ... 64 CHAP. XV. But at length fucceeds in his attempts upon both, - 681 CHAP. XVI. His fuccefs begets a blind fecurity, bf which he is once again werf nigh entrapped in his Dulcinea's apartment, - 74 CHAP. XVII. The ftep-damc's fufpicions being awakened, fhe lays a fnare for our adventurer, from which he is delivered by th interpoStion of his good geniui, - - - - 8 CHAP. XVIII. Our hero departs from Vienna, and quits the domain of Venus for the rough field of Mars, - - - 88 CHAP. XIX. He puts hiir.ftlf under the guidance of his affociatc, and Humbles up- on the Frcnth camp, where he finl/lies his military career, 9a CHAP. XX. He prepares a flratagem, but finds himfelf countermined ; proceeds on ifjotirnty, and is overtaken by a terrible tempeft, - 97 CHAP. XXI. Kc falls upon Scylla, fceiing to avoid Charybdis, - 103 CHAP. XXII. He arrives at Paiif, and is pltaftd with bis reception, - 107 CHAP. XXIII. Acquits himftif with addrcfs in a Do;;ne the reader fhall have g'anced over the fubfequenc fheets, I doubt not but he will blefs God, that the adventurei- was not his own hiftorian. This mirrour of modern chivalry was none of thofe who ow^ their dignity to the circumftances of their birth, atid are confecrated from the cradle for the purpofes of greatnefs, merely becaufe they are the accidental chil- dren of wealth. He was heir to no vifible patrimony, unlefs we reckon a robuft conftltution, a tolerable ap- pearance, and an uncommon capacity, as the advantages of inheritance : if tfee comparifon obtains in this point of confideration, he was, as muUi as any man, indebted to his parents ; and pity it wa?, that in the fequel of his fortune he never had an opportunity of manifefting his filial gratitude nd regard. From this agreeable aft of duty to his fire, and all thofe tendeniefles that are reci- procally enjoyed betv/ixt the father and the fon, he wasf unhappily excluded by a fmall circumftance ; at which, however, he was never heard to repine. In fhort, had he been brought forth in the fabulous ages of the world,- the nature of his orjgin might have turned to his ac- . count ; he might, like other heroes of antiquity, have laid claim to divine extraction, without running the rifque of being claimed by an earthly father ; not that his pa- rents had any r-cafon to difiwn or renounce their ofF- 3 fprlng,-' FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. 9 ipring, or that there was any thing preternatural in the- circumftanccs of his generation and birth ; on the con-i trary, he was, from the beginning, a child of proml- fing parts, and, in due courfe of nature, ufliered into the world aiTxidft a whole cloud of witnefles : but that he Was acknowledged by no mortal fire, folely proceeded from the uncertainty of his mother, whofe afFeftions were fo diffipated among a numiber of admirers, that fhe could never pitch upon the perfori from whofe loins our hero fprung. Over and above this important doubt, under which he^ was begotten, other particularities attended his birth, and feemed to mark him out as fomething uncommon among the fons of men. He was brought forth in a waggon,' and might be faid to be literally a native of two different countries ; for, though he firft faw the light in Holland* he was not born till after the carriage arrived in Flanders ; fo that all thefe extraordinary circumftances confidered^ the tafk of determining to what government he naturally owed allegiance, would be at leaft as difficult as that o afcertaining the fo-much-contefted birth-place of Homer. Certain it is, the Count's mother was an Englifh wq- man, who, after having been five times a widow in on* tompaign, was, in the laft year of the renowned Marlbo- rough's command, numbered among the baggage of the allied arffiy, which fhe ftill accompanied, thro' pure be- nevolence of fpirit, fupplying the ranks with the refrelh- ing fireams of choice geneva, and accommodating indivi- duals with clean linen, as the emergency of their occa- lions required : Nor was her philanthropy altogether con- fined to fuch miniftration : flie abounded with " the '* milk of human kindnefs," which flowed plentifully among her fellow-creatures ; and to every Ton of Mars who cultivated her favour, fhe liberally difpenfed her jTmiies, in order to fweeten the toils and dangers of the field. And here it will not be amifs to anticipate the remarks of the reader, who, in the chaftity and excellency of his conception may poffibl'y exclaim, " Good Heaven ! will thefe autliors never reform their imaginations, and lift their ideas frorn the obfcene objedls of low life ? Muft the Vol. I. B f public I THE ADVENTiniES 6V public be again difguftcd with the grovelling adventures' of a waggon ? Will no writer of genius draw his pen in' the vindication of tafte, and entertain us with the agree- able characters, the dignified converlation, the poignant re- partee ; infliort, the genteelcomedy of the polite world V Have a little patience, gentle, delicate, fubliuie critic ; you, I doubt not, arq one of thofe confummate connoif- feurs, who, in their purifications, let humour evaporate, while they endeavour to preferve decorum, and polifh wit, until the edge of it is quite wore off: or, perhaps, of that clafs who, in the fapience of tafte, are dif'gufted with thofe very flavours, in the productions of their own coun- try, which have yielded infinite delectation to their facul- ties, when imported from another clime ; arid damn an author in delpitc of all precedent and prefcription ; vvhcr extol the writings of Ptitronius Arbiter, read v/ith rapture the amorous fallies of Ovid's pen, and chuckle over the ftory of Lucian's afs ; yet, if a modern author prefumes to relate the progrefs of a fimple intrigue, are ihocked at the indecency and immorality of the ictne : who delight in following Guzman d' Alfarache, thro* all the mazes of fqualid beggary ; who with pleafure accompany Don Quixote and his fquire, in the lowelt paths of fortune ; who are diverted with the adventures of Scarron's ragged troop of ftroUers, and highly entertaineil with the fervile iituations of Gil Bias ; yet when a charaCter in humble life occafionally occurs in a performance of our own growtli, exclaim with an air of difguli, *' Was ever any thing fo mean ! Sure this writer mull have been very converfant with the loweft fcenes of life :"' who, when Swift or Pope reprefents a coxcomb in the act of fwearing, fcruple not to laugh at the ridiculous execrations ; but in a lefs reputed author, condemn the ufe of fiich profane expletives : who eagerly explore the jokes of Rabelais, for amufement, and even extraft humour from the dean's defcription of a lady's drefling-room : yet, in a prodmSlion oftheledays. unftampt with fuch venerable names, will ilop their nofes with all the figns of loathing and abhor- rence, at a bare mention of the china cJiamber-pot : who applaud Catullus, Juvenal, Perfius ^and Lucan, for their fpirit in lailiing the grrateft names of antiquity ; yet* when a Britifli TERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. 1 1 9. Britifh fatirift, of this generation, has courage enough to call in queftion the talents of a Pfeudo- patron in power, accufe him of infolence, rancour, and fcurrility. If fuch you be, courteous reader, I fay again, have a little patience ; for your -entertainment we are about to write. Our hero ihall, with all convenient difpatch, be gradually iublimed, into thofe fplendid connexions of which you are enamoured ; and God forbid that, in the mean time, the nature of his extraction ihould turn to his prejudice, in a land of freedom like this, where indi- viduals are every day ennobled in confcqiience of their own qualifications, without the leaft retrofpedtive regard to the rank or merit of their anceftors. Yes, relined reader, we are hntiening to that goal of perfe of making it familiar to his ear and conception^ for, even at thofe intervals, in which Ihe could find no perfon to carry on the altercation, fhe ufed to hold forth in eameft foliloquies upon the fubjecl of her own lituation, giving vent to many opprobrious inve iS. THE ADVENTURES OF been viAorious, and imputing fuch uncommon go4 fortune lO feme fupcrnatural quality inherit in her per- fon. Whether or not this confidence contributed to the for- tune of the day, by infpiriting the foldiers to an uncom- mon pitch of courage and refolution, I fhall not pretend to determine j but certain it is, the victory began from that quarter in wliich fhe had polted herfclf j and no corps in the. army behaved with fuch intrepidity as th^t, which "Was manifefted by thofe who were favoured with her ad- monitions and example j for fte not only expofed her pel Ton to the enemy's fire with the indifference and deli- beration of a veteran, but the is faici to liave atchieved a very confpicuous exploit by the prhwefs of her fingle arm : the extremity of the line to which fne iiad attached herfelf, being aifiulted in flank by a body of the ipahi'-, wheeled a- bout in order to fuftain the charge, and received them with fuch a feafpnable fire, as brcu_ht a great number of turbans to the ground ; among thcfe who fell was one of the chiefs, or aga's, who had advanced before the retf, with a view to lignslize his valour. Our Englifli Penthelilea no foonerfaw this Turkifh lead- er drop, than, flruck with the magnificence of b'S ovrn and horfe's trappings, fhe fprung forward to feize them as her prize, and found ihe aga not dead, though in a good meafure difabled by his misfortune, which was entirely cwing to the weight of his horf'e, that having been- killed by a miifkct-ball, lay upon his kg, fo that he could not difengage himfelf. Neverthekfs, p>erceiving the virago appi-oach with fell intent, he branditbcd his fcymitar, and tried to intimidate his. afiaiiant witH a mofl horrible ex- clamation j but it was not thedifmal yell of a difmounted tavalicr, tho' enforced with a hideous ferocity of countc* nance, and the menacing gefiurcs v/ith v.hich he waited her approach, that could intimidate fuch an undaunted ihe-campajgner j ihe law him wrirhing in the agonies of a fituation from which he could not move ; and, running towards hirii wich the nimblenefs and intrepidity of a Ca- jziilla, defer ibed ufemicircte in the prcgrefs of her aflault, and attav king him ort one fide, plunged her well-tried dagger in his throat : the Ihades of death encompaffcd ' - him FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. i^ ]litm,his life-blood iiTucd at the wound, he fell prone upon the earth, he bit the duft, and having thrice invoked the name of Allah ! ftraight expired. While his deftiny was thus fulfilled, his followers be- gan to reel ; they feetned difmayed at the fate of their chief, beheld their companions drop like the leaves in autumn, and fuddenly halted in the midfl of their career. The Imperialitls obferving the coiifufion of the enemy, redoubled tlicir lire ; and railing a dreadful fliout, advan- ced in order to improve the advantage they had gained : %he fpahis durft not wait the Ihock of fuch an encounter; they wheeled to the right about, and clapping fpurs to their horfes, fled in tlie utmoft diforder. Tbis was ac- tually the circumftance that turned the fcalc of battle ; the Aultrians purlued their good fortune with uncommori impetuolity, and in a few minutes left the field clear for the mothot of our hero, who was luch an adept in the art of ftrlpping, that in the twinkling of an eye, the bodies of the aga and his Arabian lay naked to the ikin. It would have been happy for her, had Ihe been contented with thefe firft-fruits reaped from the fortune of the day, and retired with her fpoils, which were not inconliderable ; butf intoxicated with the glory ihe had wonj enticed by the glittering caparifons that iay fcattered dn the plain, and, without doubt, prompted by the fecrct inflinft of hef fate, file refolved to feize opportunity by the fore-lock^ and once for all indemnify hcrfelf for the many fatigues, hazards, and forrows, Ihe had undergone. Thus determined, me reconnoitred the field, and prac- tiled her addrefs fo fuccefsfuUy, that in lels than half aii hour file was loaded with erniin and embroidery, and difpofed to retreat with her burthen, ^'!'hen her regards were folicited by a fplendid bundle, wliich file defcried at fome diftance lying on the ground. This wss no other than an unhappy ofiicer of hufir.rs ; who, after having had the good fortune to take a Turkiih fiiandard, was ^efperately wounded in the thigh, and obliged to quit his horfe : finding himifelf in luch an helpiefs condition, he Lad wrapped his acquilition round his body, that what- ever might happen, he and his glory Ihould not be part- ed J and thus Ihrouded among the dving aad the deadj C 2 he i6 t^E ADVENTURES OF he had obferved the progrcfs of our heroine, who {laTked about the field, like another Atropos, finifliing, where- ever (he came, the work of death : he did not at all doubt^ that he himfelf would be vifitcd irr the courfe of her pe- regrination*!, and therefore pro^-id'cd for her reception^ with z piftol ready cock'd in his hand, while he lay per- due, beneath his xrovert, in ali appearance bereft of life. He was not deceived in his prognoftic ; (he no fooner ^ that of the young count, when he immediately perceived the fameneis, and far from imputing it to the true caufe, upbraided him with having copied the extrcife of our adventurer, and inllfted upon chadiling him upon the fpot for his want of application. Had not the young gentleman thought his honour was concerned, he would have fui>mitted to the punilhment without murmuring ; but he inherited from his parents the pride of two fierce nations, and being overwhelmed witii reproaches, for that which, he imagined, ought to have redounded to his gloiy, he could not bruik the in-" dignity, and boldly affirmed, that he hirafelf was the original, to whom Ferdinand was beholden for his per- formance. The fchool-mafter, nettled to find himi'elf mifiaken in his judgment, i-efolved that the count ihould have no caufe to exult in the difcovery he had made, and, like a true flogger, actually whipt him for having allowed Fathom to copy his exercife. Nay, in the hope Vo;.. I. ' D t , of 26 THE ADVENTUR ES OF of vindicating his own penetration, he took an oppor-> tunlty of (.jueltioning Ferdinand in private, concerninir the circuinliances of the tranflation ; and our hero, per- ceiving his drift, gave him fuch artful and ambiguous an- iWers, as peffuadcd him that the yowng count had a^ted the part of a plagiary, and that the other had been re- strained from doing himfelf juftice, by the confideratiou of his own dependence. This profound direlor did not fail, in honour of his own difccrnment, to whifiier about themifreprefcntation, as an inftancc of the young count's infolence, and Fa- thom's humility and good lenfe. The ftorv was circula- ted among the fervants, eipecially the maids belonging lo the family, whofe favour our hero had acquired b)' his engaging behaviour ; and at length it reached the ears of Ids patron, who_ incenfed at his fon's priiumption and inhofpiLaliry, called him to a levere account, when the young gentleman abfolutely denied the truth of rhe alic- j;ation, and appealed to the evidence of Fathom himfeif. Our adventurer was accordingly lummoned by the father, and encouraged to declare the truth, with an afTurance of his confcant proteclion ; upon which Ferdinand very wifely fell upon his knees, and while the tears gufhed. from his eyes, acquitted the young count of the imputa- tion, and exprrlled his appreh^nlion, that tl.e report had been fpread by fome of his enemies, who watitcd to prejudice him in the opinion of his patron. The old geiitleman was not fatisfied of his fon'^j inte- grity, by this declaration : being naturally of a generous difpolition, highly prepoirdTed in favour of the poor or- phan, and chagrined at the unpromiiing apj>caranv;e of his heir, he fufpected that Fatiiom was overawed by the fear of giving offence, and that notwithftandin what he had iaid, the cafe really ifood as it had been reprefentcd. In this perfuaQon, he earneilly exhorted his fon to refift and combat with any impu'tfe he might f-.tl within him- feif, tending to felfiihnefs, fraud, or impolition ; to en- courage evei y fentiment of candor and benevolence, and to behave with moderation and affabihty to all his feliow- creatures. He laid upon* him flrong injunte him in the favour of this young lady ; the greennlfs of his years fe- cured him from any fufpicion of fallacious aim : fo that he was indulged in frequent opportunities of converfing "with hisyoung nuftrers,whofc parents encouraged this commu- nication, by which they hoped fhe would improve In fpcak- ing the language of her father. Such connections naiurallr produce FERDINAND GOUNT FATHOM. t^ produce intimacy and fricndlhip. Fathom's perfon was agreeable, liis talents -calculated for the mchdian of thofe parties, and his manners f"o engaging, that there would have been no jult fubje61: for wonder, had he ma'^e arj impreflion upon the tendt^r unexperienced neart of Made- rnoil'elle de Mevil, whole beauty was not o attractive a$ to extinguith his hope, in railing up a number of formi- dable rivals ; though her expeiSlanons of fortune were fuch as comuionly lend additional Juitre to perfonal merit. All thefe confiderations were fo many fteps towards the fuccefs of Ferdinand's pretenfions ; and thougii he cannot be fuppofed to have perceived them at firlt, he, in the fequcl, Teemed perfe(fkly well apprized of his advantages, and ufed them to the full extent of his faculties. Observing that ihe delighted in mulic, he betook himfelf to the ftudy of that art, and by dint of application and a tolerable ear^ learned of himfelf to accompany her with a German flute, while ihe lung and played upon the harpfichord. The count feeing his inclination, and the progrefs he had made, refolvcd that his capacity Ihould not be loft for want of cultivation ; and accordingly provided him with a mal^ ter, by whom he was inftruled in the principles of the art, and foon became a proficient in playing upon tha violin. Jn the prailice of thcfc improvements and avocations, and in attendance upon his young mafter, whom he tCK^k care never to difoblige or neglect, he attained to the age of fixteen, without feelinc, the leail abatement iii the fi iendlhip and generolity of thofe upon whom he depend^ ed ; but, on the contrary, receiving every day freili marks of their bounty and regard. He had, before this time, been fmit with the ambition of makmg a conqueft of the young lady's heart j and forefaw manifold advantages to himfelf, in becoming fon-in-law to count Melvil, who, he jaevcr doubted, would foon be reconciled to the match, if once it could be eiJeowfd upon his miftrefs ; he regaled her with all the entertaining (lories he could learn or invent, particularly fuch as he thought would juflify and recom- mend the levelling pcwer of love, that knows no diftinc- tions of fortune. He fung nothing but tender airs and pafiionate complaints, compofcd by defponding or defpair- ing fwains ; and, to render his performances of this kinfl the more pathetic, interlarded them with fom.e feafcnable fighs, while the tenrs which he had ever at command, flood collected in either eve. It FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. 31 It was iinpoflible for her to overlook fucli fiudied emo^ tlons -, (he, in a jocol'e manner, taxeJ him with having loft his heart, rallied the excels of his paffion, and in a merry ftrain undertook to be an advocate for his love. Her behaviour wasftill wide of his wi/h and expectation : he thought Ihe would, in confeqaence of her diicoveiy, have betrayed fomc interefted lymptom ; that her face would liave undergone feme favourable fulfullon ; that her tongue would have faultered, her bread heaved, and her whole deportment betokened internal agitation and dil- order -y in which cafe, he meant to profit by the happy imprcJlion, and declare himfclf before fhe could puflibly recollect the dlSlates of her pride. Baffled, however, iu his endeavours, by the ferenity of the young lady, which he ftill deemed equivocal, he had recourfe to another expe- riment, by which he believed he ihould make a difcovery of her fentiments, beyond all poilibility of doubt. One day, while he accompanied Mademolfelie in her exercifea of muiic, he pretended all of a fudden to be taken ill, and counterfeited a fwooii in her apartment. Surprifed at this accident, fhe fcreamed aloud, but far from running to his afliftance, with the tranfports and diilracllon of a lover, (he ordered her maid, who was prefent, to fupport his head, and went in perfon to call for more help : he was accordingly removed to his own chamber, where, wil- ling to be ftill more certified of lur inclinations, he pro- longed the farce, and lay groaning under the prueace of a fevere fever, ' ; The whole family was alarmed upon this occafion j for, as we have already ohferved, he was an univerfal favour- ite. He was immediately viiited by the old count and his lady, who exprefled the utmoft concern at his diftem- per, ordered him to be carefull/ attended, and fqnt for a phylician without lois of time. The young gentleman would fcarce flir from his bed-fide, where he minillered unty him with all the demonftratious of brotherly affec- tion ; and Mifs exhorted him to keep up his fpirits, with many exprefiions ofunreferved fympathy and regard; neverthelefs, he law nothing in her behaviour but what might be naturally expected from common friendlhip, and ' a com- J2 THE ADVENTURERS OF a compaflionate difpolltion, and was very much mortified 4t his difappointment Whether the mifcarriage aftually afRfted his conltitu- tion, or the doctor happened to be millaken in his diag- noilics, we ihaii not pretend to determine 5 but thfe patient was certainly treated Secundum Arte.u, and all his com-, plaints in a little time realized j for the phyiician, like a true graduate, had an eye to the apothecary in his prc- fcriptions ; and fuch was the goiicern and fcrupulous care with which our hero was attended, that the orders of the faculty were performed with the utinoft punctuality. He was blooded, vomited, purged and biiflered in the ufual forms, (for the phyhcians of Hungary are generally as well fkilled in the arts of their occupation as any other leec^.es under the fun) and fw.dlo.ved a whole difpenfary of bokifl'es, draughts, and apozeras, by which means he became fairly delirious in tliree diys, and fo untra(5table, that he could be no longer managed according to rule ; otheiwiie, in all likelihood, the world would never have enjoyed the benefit ofthefe adventures. In Ihort, his Conftitution, tho' unabte to cope with two fuch formidable antagonifts, as the doftor, and the difeafe he had conjur- ed up, was no fooner rid of the one, than it eaiily got the better of the other : and though Ferdinand, after all, found his grand aim imaccomplilhed, his malady was prmiuc- tive of a confequence, which, though he had not forefeen it, he did not fail to convert to his own ule and advan- tage. C H A P. VII. Engages in parinerjh'ip ivith a female njjhciatej in order io put his talents in aHon. WHILE he difplayed his qualifications m order ta intrap the h^art of his young miftreis, he had uji- W)ttingly enllaved the ifFeStinns of her maid. This at- tendaiit was alfo a fav l !t^; of the young lady, and though her Lnior by two or tiiico good years at leaft, unqueftio'n- I ably I'EROIbfAND COUNT FATHOM. gj aibly her fuperior in point of perfonal beauty ; fhe more- over poflefled a good ftock of cunning and difcemment, *id was furniflicd by nature with a very amorous com- plexion. Thefe clrcumflances being premifed, the reader will not be furprifed to find her fmitten by thofe uncom- mon qualifications which we have celebrated in young Fa- thom. She had, in good footh, long fighed in fecret, un- der the powerful inHuene of his charms, and pradtifed upon him all thofe little arts, by which a woman ilrives to attraft the admirjition, and enfnare the heart of a man fhe loves ; but all his faculties were employed upon the plan which he had already projefted , that was the goal of his whole attention, to which all his meafures tend- ed -, and whether or not he perceived the impreflion he had made upon Terefa, he never gave her the leaft reafon to believe he was confcious of his viftory, until he found himfelf bafrled in his defign upon the heart of his miftrefs. She therefore perfevered in her diftant attempts to allure him with the ufual coquetries of drefs and addrefs, and in the fweet hope of profiting by his fufceptibility, made fhift to fupprefs her feelings, and keep her paffion withia bounds ; until his fuppofed danger alarmed her fears, and raifed fuch a tumult within her breaft, that (he could no^ longer conceal her love, but gave a loofe to her forrow in the moft immoderate exprefllons of anguifh and afiliftion, and while his delirium lafted, behaved with all the agita- tion of a defpairing (hepherdefs. Ferdinand was, or pretended to be, the laft perfon ia the family who underftood the fituation of her thoughts j when he perceived her paffion, he entered iilto delibera- tion with himfelf, and tafked his reflection Jand forefight, in order to difcover how beft he might convert this con- queft to his own advantage. Here then, that we may neglet no opportunity of doing Juftice to our hero, it will be proper to obferve, that howfoever unapt his underftand-' ing might be to receive and retain the ufual culture of the fchools, he was naturally a genius felf-taught, in point offagacity and invention. He dived into the characters of mankind, with a penetration peculiar to himfelf, and had he been admitted a^ a pupil in anv political academy. Vol. I. E t ' he 34 . . THE ADVENTURES OF would hate certainlj become one of the ablcft ftatcfmctf in Europe.^ u' v-c ^ > i.^r Having revolved aU the probable confequences of fuchv a connelion, he cletern"\ined to profecute an amour with the lady whole afFedtion he had fubdued ; becaufe he ho- ped to intereft her as an auxiliary in his grand fcheme upon Mademoifelle, which he did not as yet think proper to lay aflde ; for he was not more ambitious in the plan, than indefatigable in the profecution of it. He knew it would be impoffible to execute his aims upon the count's daughter, under .the eyt of Testla, whofe natural difcern-- ment would be whetted with jealoufy, and who would watch his conduct, and thwart his progrefs with all the vigilance and fpite of a flighted maiden. On the other hand, he did not doubt of being able to bring her over to his intereft, by the influence he had already gained, or might afterwards acquire over her pallloris j in which cafe, fhe would effectually efpoufe his caufe, and employ her good offices with her mifirefs, in his behalf: beiides, he was indoiced by another motive, which, though fecondary, did not fail in this cafe to have an effect upon his deter- mination. He looked upon Terefa with the eyes of appe- tite, which he longed to gratify : for he was not at all dead to the inftigations of the flefh, though he had phi- lofophy enough to refift them, when he thought they in- terfered with his intereft. Here the caic was quite dif- ferent : his defire happened to be upon the fide of his ad- vantage, and therefore, refolving to indulge it, he no fooner found himfelf in a condition to manage fuch an ad- venture, than he began to make gradual advances in point of warmth and particular complacency to the love-hck maid. He, firft of all, thanked her in the moft grateful terms, for the concern fhe had manifefted at his diftemper, and the kind fervices he had received from her during the courfe of it ; he treated her, upon all occahons, with un- ufual affability and regard, aftiduoufly courted her ac- quaintance and converlation, and contracted an intimacy that, in a little time, produced a declaration of love. Al- though her heart was too much intenc'ered to hold out againft all the forms of aflault, far from yielding at dil- cretion. FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. $s :'n terms of rapture, to all his friends and dependents, and by dint of unwearied folicitation procured a very ample fubfcription for the author. But, torefume the thread of our ftory ; Terefa's prac- tices were not contined to fimple defamation ; her re- proaches were contrived fo as to imply fome intelligence in favour of the perfon Ihe reviled. In exemplifying his pertnefs and arrogance, ilie repeated his witty repartees ; on pretence of blaming his ferocity, {he recounted proofs of his Ipirit and prowefs *, and in explaining the fource of his vanity, gave her miftreft to underffcand, that a certain young lady of falbion was faid to be enamoured of his per- fon. Nor did this welUinftrudled underftrapper omit thofe other parts of her cue, which the principal judged necefiary for the furtherance of his fcherr.e. Her con- verfatioa became lefs guarded, and took a freer turn than ufiial : (lie feized all opportunities of introducing liitle amorous Tories, the greateft part of which were invented for the purpofes of warming her paffions, and lowering the price of chaftity in her efteem ; for (he reprefented all tiie young lady's co-temporaries in point of age and fitua- tion, as {o many ienfualifls^ who without fcruple indulged themi'elves in the flolen pleafures of youth. Meanwhile Ferdinand ieconded thefe endeavours witli his whoie induitry and addrefs : he redoubled, if poffible, his deference and refpeft ; whetted his afliduityto the keen- eft edge of attention ; and, in fhort, regulated his drefs, converfation, and deportment, according to the fancy, turn, and prevailing humour of his young miftrefs. He rrtore- over attempted to proiit by her curiofity, which he knevi/^ to be truly feminine, and having culled from the library of his patron certain dangerous books, calculated to de- bauch the minds of young people, left them occafionally upon the table in his apartment, after having directed Te- refa to pick them up, as if by accident, in his abfence, and carry them off fur the entertainmient of Mademoifellc : i:!ay,. this crafty projector found means to furnifh his af- fociate with fome mifchievous preparations, which were mingled iti her chocolate, tea, or coffee, as provocations to v,-.irm her conftitution : yet all thcfe machinations, in- . Vol. I. Y" [ genious 4i TH ADVENTURES OF genious Is they were, failed, not only in fulfilling their" aim, but even in Ihaking the foundations of her virtue or pride ; which ftood their aflaults, unmoved, like a ftrong tower built upon a rock, impregnable to all the tempef- tuous Walls of heaven. Not but that the conrpirators were more than once mif- taken in the etFedts of their artifices, and difpofed to ap- plaud themftrlves on the progrefs they had made. When at any time flie exprefl'ed a defire to examine thofe per- formances v/hich were laid before her as fnares to entrap her chaftity, they attributed that, which was no other than curiolity, to a loofenefs of fentiment ; and when Ihe difcoverecl no avei-fion to hear thofe anecdotes concerning the frailty of her neighbours, they imputed to abatement of chaftity, that fatisfaction which was the refult of felf- congratulation on her own fuperior \irtue. So far did the treacherous accomplice of Fathom pre- fume upon thefe mifconilructions, that flie at length di- verted her tongue of all reftraint, and behaved in fuch a manner, that the young lady, confounded and incenfed at her indecency and impudence, rebuked her with great fe- verity, and commanded lier to reform her difcourfe, on pain of being difmiired with difgrace from her iervice. CHAP. IX. J^he confederates change their battery ; cmd atchieve a remarka" ble adventure. THUNDERSTRUCK at this difappointmcnt, the con- federates held a council, in order to deliberate up^in the next meafures that (hould be taken ; and Ferdi- nand, for the prefent, defpairing of accomplifhing his grand aim, refolved to profit in another manner, by the convcniency of his lituation. He reprefented to his help- mate, that it would be prudent for them to make hay while the fun fhone, as their connection might be fooner or later difcovered, and an end pot to all thofe opportu- nities which they now fo happily enjoyed. All principlrs of morality had been already excluded from their former FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. 43 j^an ; confequently he found it an eafy talk to intereft Tcrcfa in any other fchcme tending to their mutual ad- vantage, ho\v prizlngly juft and acute, had not attained to that maturity which age and experience give : but now, his perception'? began to be more diftindl, and extended to a thoufand objefts which had never before come i^der his cogi^i- 2;ance. He had formerly Imagined, but was now fully perfuad- ed, that the fons of men preyed upon one another, apd fuch was the end and condition of their being. Among the principal figures of life, he obfcrved few or no charac- ters that did not bear a ftrong analogy to the fayage tyrants of the wood. One refemblcd a tyger in fury and rapacl- pufnefs ; a fecond prowled about like ;^n hungry wolfV feeking whom he might devour i a third aled the pa^-t of a jackall, in beating the bulh for game to his voracious employer ; and a fourth imitated the wily fox, in prac- tiling a thoufand crafty ambufcades for the deftruflion of the ignorant and unwary. This laft was the depart- ment of li/e* for whicli he found himfelf bcft qualified by nature and incUnation, and he accordingly rjsl'ol wed diat his talent fhould not ruft in his poflefllon. He was al- ready pretty well verfed in all the fciences of play ; but he had eyery day occalion to fee thefe arts carried to fuch a furprizing pitch of fineffe and dexterity, as difeourage4 him from building his fchemes on that foundation. He therefore determme^l to fafcinate the judgment, rather than the eyes of his fellow- creature, by a continu- al exercife of that gift jof deceiving, with which he knew himfelf endowed to an unrivalled degree; and to acquire unbounded influence xyith thofe who mJght be fublervi- ent to his intereli, by an affiduous application to their pre- vailing paffions. Not that play was altogether left out in the projeilion of his .oeconomy ; though he engaged himfelf very little in the executive part of gaming : He had not been long in Vienna when he entered into league. with a genius of that kind, whom he diftinguifhed among the pupils of the academy, and who indeed had taken up his habitation in that place, with a view to pillage the provincials on their firft arrival in town, before they could be armed with proper circumfpettion to prcferve Vol. I. G t 5 THE ADVExNTTURES OF tlieir money, or have time to difpofe of it in zjxy othst ihape. v^' " -'. vy.^'"^'- Similar dhaf afters naturally attral each other, and peo- ple of our hero's principles are, of all others, the moft apt to diftinguifh their own likenefs wherefoever it oc- curs ; becaule they always keep the faculty of difcerning in full exertion. It was in confequence of this mutual a- lertnefs, that Ferdinand and che ftrangcr, who was a na- tive of Tyrol, perceived themfelves refieftcd in the dif- pofitions of each other, and Immediately entered into an ofFenfive and defenlive alliance : our adventurer under- taking for the articles of intelligence, countenance, and counfel ; and his aflbciate charging himfelf with the rifquc of execution. CHAP. XL Fatham makes various efforts in the world of gallantry. THUS connefted, they began to hunt in couples 5 and Fathom, in order to profit by the alliance, mxh. a good grace, contrived a fmall fcheme that fpcceeded to his wifli. Renaldo being one night intoxicated in the courfe of a merry-making with his fellow-pupils, from which Fathom had pnrpofcly abfented himfelf, was by the Tyroleze fo artfully proypked to play, that he could not refill the temptation, but engaged at pafs-dice with that fell adverfary, who, in lefs than an hour, dripped him of a pretty round fum. Next day, when the young gen- tleman recovered the ufe of his reflection, he was fenfibly chagrin'd at the folly and precipitation of his own con- duft, an account of which he communicated in confi- dence to our hero, with demonftrations of infinite fhame and concern. Ferdinand having moralized upon the fubjeft tnth great fagacity, and fliarply inveighed againft the Tyroleze, for the unfair advantage he had taken, retired to his clo- fet and wrote the following billet, which was immediately fent to his alley : The FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. ji " The obligations I owe, and the attachments I feel to *' the count de Melvile, will not fuffer me to be an idle *< fpectator of the wrongs offered to his fon, in the di(hon- " ourable ufe, I iinderftand, you made hO: night of his un- ** guarded hours : I therefore infifl: upon your making ^' immediate reftitution of the booty which you fo unjuftly " go: i otherwife I e^pe<5l you will meet me upon the *' ramparts, near the baftion de la Purt-Neuve, to-mor- " row morning at day-break, in order to juftify witb *' your fword, the finelTe you have pralifed upon the ** friend of " pERDiNANt) de Fathom." The gamefter no foonei* received this intimation, than, According to the plan which had been preconcerted be- twixt the author and him, he went to the apartment of Renaldo, and prefenting the fuih of money which he had defrauded him of the preceding night, told him with a ftern countenance, that though it was a jiift acquifitioHj he fcorned to avail himfelf of his good fortune againft any perfon who entertained the fmalleft doubt of his ho- nour. The young count, furprifed at this addrefs, rejected his offer with difdam, and defired to know the meaning of fuch an unexpedted declaration. Upbn which the other produced Ferdinand's billet, and threatned, in very high terms, to meet the ilrippling according to his invitation, and chaftife him feverely for his prefumption. The confe- quence of this explanation is obvious. Renaldo imputing the officidufnefs of Fathom to the zeal of his friendfhip, interpofed in the quarrel, which was amicably compromi- fed, not a little to the honour of our adventurer, who thus obtained an opportunity of difplaying his courage and integrity, without the leaft hazard to his perfon ; while, at the fame time, his confederate recommended himfelf to the efteem of the young count, by his fpirited behaviour on this occafion ; lb that Renaldo, being lefs fhy of his company for the future, the Tyroleze had the fairer opportunities to profecute his deligns upon the young gentleman's purfe. It would bs almoil fuperfluous to fay that thefe were G 2 not ^z tHE ADVENTURES OF liot neglected. The foh of count Melvile was not d'efi-' cient in point of penetration: but his whole ftudy was, at that time, engroffcd by the care of his education j and he had Ibmetimes recourfe to play, as to an amufement by v/hich he fought to unbend the feverity of his atten- tion : no wonder then that he fell a prey to an artful gamefler, who had been regularly trained to the profcf- ilon, and made it the fcle lludy of his life ; efpecially as the llung-.irian was reinarkablc for a warmth of temper, v;hich a knight of tlie pofi: always knows bow to manag_e for his own advantage. In the courfe of thefe operations, Fathom was a very nfeful'correfpondent r he infkruted the Tyroleze in the 'peculiarities of Renaldo's difpofltlon, and made him ac- quainted with the proper feafons for profiting by his dexterity. Ferdinand, for example, who by the autho- rity derived to him from the injunftions of the old count, fometimes took upon himtelf the office of an advifer, cunningly chofe to counfel the fon, at thofe conjunctures, when he knew him leafl able to bear fuch expoftulation. Advice, improperly adminiftred, generally adls in dbmetri- cal oppofition to the purpofe for which it is fuppofed to be given : at leafl this Was the cafe with the young gentle- man, who, inflamed by the reproof of fuch a tutor, ufed to obey the didlatCs of his refcntment, in an immediate repetition cf that condudl which our adventurer had ta- ken the liberty to difapprove ; and the gamefter was al- ways at hand, to minifter unto his Indignation. By thefe means he was difencumbercd of divers Coniiderable re- mittances, with which liis father cheartully fupplied him, on the iuppofition that tliey were fpent with talle and li- berality, under the direftion of our adventurer. But Ferdinand's views were riot confined to the narrow field of tills alliance : he attempted divers enterprises in the world of gallantry, confcious of his own perianal qua- hfications, and never doubting that he could iniinuate himfelf into the good graces of foine married lady about ged their vow5, by the expreffive language of the eyes ; he had even declared himfelf in fome tender ejaculations which had been foftly whifpcred in her ear, when he could fnatch an opportunity of venting them, unpcrceived; nay, he had, upon divers occafions, gently fqueezed her fair hand, on pretence of tuning her harpfichord, and been favoured with returns of tlie fame cprdial preirure: fothat, inrteadof accofting her with the fearful heiitation and referve of a timid fwain, he told her, after the exer- cifc of the doux-yeux, that he was come to confer with her upon a fubje^l that nearly concerned her peace ; and afked, if fhe bad not obferved, of late, an evident abate* ment of friendfhip in her mother's behaviour to him, whom fhe had formerly treated with fuch marks of favour and refpe^t. Mademoifelle would not pay fo ill a com- pliment to her own difccrnment as to fay fhe had not perceived the alteration, which, on the contrary, fhe own- ed was extremely palpable ; nor was it difficult to divine the caufe of fuch eflranged looks- This reanark was ac- companied with an irrefillible glance, fhe fmiled inchant- ingly, the colour deepened on her cheeks, her breafts be- gan to heave, and hei' whole fi-ame underwent a mod agreeable confulloa. Ferdinand was not a man to let fuch a favourable con- junchire pafs unregarded. *' Yes, clxarming Wilhelmi- na 1 exclaimed the politician in an affected rapture, the <:aufe is as confpicuous as your attraer people ; but that thefe people de- fpifcd the infinuations of fuch people, who ought to be more circumfpcct In their own cond^ldt, left they themfclvc s flioul4 FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. e then gave him, an account of what fhe had feen, with all the exaggera- tions of her own fancy, and after having weighed the cir- cumflances of her ftory, he interpreted the apparition in- to a thief, who had found means to open the door that communicated with the itair, but having been feared by Wilhelmina's fliriek, had been obliged to retreat before he could execute his purpofe. Our hero's fpirits were fo woefully difturbed by this adventure, that for a whole week he felt no inclination to vifit his inamorata, and was not without apprehenfion that the affair had terminated in an explanation very . little to his advantage. He was, however, delivered from this difagreeablf fufpence, by an accidental meeting vvith the jeweller himfelf, who kindly chid him for his long abfence, and entertained him in the ftreet with an ac- count f the alarm which his family had fuftnined by a, thief 4 THEADVENTUIIESOF thief who broke into Wilhelmina's apartment. Glad to ' find his appreheniion miftaken, he r her own fex, in whofe -difcr^tion fhe could confi^^-'jfnd after a few affcfted fcruplcs on her fide, x^^fiThe well kn^'w hov/ to furmount, flie complie^i -fH^i his requeft, and the circumffanccs of the ajij>8rritment v/ere fettled accordingly. After this treaty, their fatisfaclion rofe to to run any rifque in behalf of his happinefs and peace. After this atfection- nate preamble, Ihe told him that her huluand was then en- gaged in a quarterly meeting of the jewellers, from whenpe he never failed to return quite overwhelmed with wine, tobacco, and the phlegm of his own conliitution ; fo that he would fall fart: afleep as foon as his head (hould touch the pillow ; and fhe be at liberty to entertain the lover without interruption, provided he could find means to deceive the jealous vigilance of Wilhelmina, and conceal himfdf in fome corner of the houfe, unfufpeited and un- perceived. Our lover, remembering his adventure with the dauglij ter, would have wiUingly difpenfed with this expedient, and began to repent of the eageruefs with which he had. preferred his felicitation : but, feeing there was now no opportunity of retra(fting with honour, he affected to en- ter heartily into the converfation, and after much can- vaffing, it was determined, while Wilhelmina was era- ployed in the kitchen, the mother lliou'd condufl our adventurer to the outward door, where he fliouid pay the compliment of parting, fo as to be overiieard by the young lady, but in the mean time glide foftly into the jeweller's bed-chamber, which was a place they imagined leaft-iiable to the effefts of a daughter's , prying difpoH- tion ; and conceal himfelf in a large prefs or wardrobe, that ftood in one corner of the apartment. The fceoe was immediatijji adted with great fuccefs, and our hero vooped up in his cage, where he waited fo long, that his deiires began to fubiiJe, and his imaginatipu to aggravate the danger of his fituation. Vol. I. 2 f I Suppofe," (t^ THE ADVENTURES OF " Suppcfe," faid he to himfelf, this urutal Gcfmaitji inftead of ^eing ftupified with wine, Ihould come home inflamed with brandy, to the ufc of which he is fome- times addiiled ; far from feeling any inclination to fleep'^ he will labour under the moft fretful anxiety of watching, every irafcible particle in ha. difpofition will be exaipe- rated : he will be offended with every objedl: that may prefent itfeif to his view, and if there is the leaft ingre- dient of jealoufy in his temper, it will manifeft itfeif in rage. What if his frenzy fhould prompt him to fearch his wife's chamber for gallants ? This would certainly be the firft place to which he would direft his inquiry ; or, granting this fuppofition chimerical, I may be feized with an irrefiftible inclination to cough, before he is oppreffed' with fleep : he may be waked by the noifc I ihall make in difengaging myfelf from this embarraffed iituation ; and^ iinally, I may find it impnwElicable to retire unfeen or unheard, after every ^ing elfe fhall have fuceeded to my wiih.'^ Thefe fuggcftions did not at all contribute to the quiet of our adventurer, who having waited three whole hours in the moft uncomfortabe fufpence, heard the jeweller brought into the room in that very condition which his fears had prognofticated. He had, it feenis, quarrelled over his cups with another tradefman, and received a fa- hitation on the forehead with a candleftick, which not only left an ignominious and painful mark upon his countenance, but even difordered his brain to a very dan-r gerous degree of delirium : fo that, inftead of allowing himfelf quietly to be undreffed and put to bed by hia wife, he anfwered all her gentle admonitions and caref- ie?, with the moft opprobrious ^nveiSlives and obftreper- ous behaviour ; and though he did not tax her with in- fidelity to his bed, he virulently accufed her of extrava- gance and want of ceconomy, obferved her expenfive way of living would bring him to a morfel of bread, and un- ibrtunately rccoll-rdting the attempt of the fuppoffd thief, ftarted up from his chair, fwearing by God's moth.er, that h^ would forthwith arm himfelf with a brace of pif- tols, and fearch every apartment of the houfe. " That prefs,'* FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. 67 frtfefs," laid he, with great vociferation, " may, for aught I know, be the receptacle of fome ruifian," So faying, he approached the ark in which Fathoni was embarked, and exclaiming, ' Come forth, Satan," applied his foot to the door of it with fuch violence a$ threw him from the centre of gravity, and laid him iprawling on his back. This addrefs made fuch an im- preffion upon our adventulrer, that he had well nigh obey- ed the funmions, and btirft from his concealment, in a defperate eflfort to efcape, withoiit being recognized by the intoxicated German : and indeed had the application been repeated, he in all likelihood would have tried the Experiment ; for, by this time, his terrors had waxed too ftrong to be much louger fuppreffed ; from this hazar- dous enterprize, he was hovvever exempted by a lucky accident that happened to his diliurber, whofe head chan- ting to pitch upon the corner of a chair in his fall, he was^imiiiediateiy lulled into a trance j during whrcii the confideirate lady guefling the diforder of her galliai't, and dreading further interruption, Very prudently releafed him from his confinement, aftei- flie had put out the light, and in the dark conveyed him to tlie door, where he was com*- forted with the promife that flie would puntually re* member the rendezvous of next day. She then invoked the affiftance of the fervants, Who be* >ng waked for the purpofe, lifted up their matter, and tumbled Iiiinl into bed, while Ferdinand hied him home in an univerfai fweat, bleHing himfetf from any future at- chievement of that fort, in an houfe where he had been twice in fuch imminent danger of life and reputation. Neverthelcfsj he did not fail to honour the affignation, and avail himfelf of the difpolition his miftrefs ihanifefted, to make him all the recompence in her power for the dii* fqppoifitment a;n^ chagrin which he had andcrgone* n% CHAP, 6 THE ADVENTURES OF C H A P. XV. But at length fiioceeds itK his attetnpts upon both*^ HAviNG thus gained a complete victory over tlie af-- fpcSlions of thei'e two ladies, he began to converr his good forjrune to tlie purpofes of tliat principle, froai' which his. view was never, no not for a moment, detach- ed. }a other words, he ufed them as minifters and pur- veyors to his a\Mrice and fr;!ud'. As for the mother-in- law, fae was of herfe'f fo liberal as to anticipate the wifli- es of any moderate adventurer, and prefented him with fundry vahiable jewels, as memorials of her efleem ; nor was the daughter backward in fuck exprelTions of regard ; ihe already confideredhis intereft as her ownj and took frequent opportunities of fecreting, for his benefit, cer- tain ftray trinkets that Ihe happened to pick up in her ex- curflons within doors ^ All thefe gratifications he received with deraonftrations of infinite conftraint and reluctance, and in the midffc of his rapacious extortion, acted fo cunningly as to impofe Iiimfelf upon both, for a miracle of difinterefted integri- ty. Yet not contented with what he thus could eam> and deipairing of being able to lleer the bark of his for- tune for any length of time, between two fuch danger- ous quickfands, he refolved to profit by the occafion while it larted, and ftrike fiime confiderable (Iroke at once. A plan was formed in confequence of this detennination, and at an appointment with the mother, in the houi'e of their female friend, our adventurer appeared with an air of de- jcclion^ which he veiled with a thin cover of forced plea- santry, that his miftrefs might fuppofe he endeavour- ed to conceal fome mcArtal cliagria that preyed upon his heart. The ftratagem fucceeded to his wifli : {lie obferved his- coiantenance between whiles ov profefs for yoar amiable perfon, is not founded on fuch in> gloriouft ^ the moft pafHonate remonftrances of love, and fell at his feet in the pofture of a forlorn fhepherdefs. What ho I'efufed to her reafon, he granted to her tears, becauft his heart was melted by her affliction, and next day con- dcfcended to accept of her money, out of pure regard to her happinefs and peace. Encouraged by the fuccefs of this atchievement, he re~ fblved to pradice the fame experiment upon Wilheimina, in hope of extradling an equal fliare of profit from her iimplicity and attachment ; and at their very next no^ur- Dal rendezvous in her chamber, re-a<^led the farce already rehcarfed j with a fmall variation, which he thought ne- cefiary to llimulate the young lady in his behalf. He rightly concluded, that fiie was by no means miftrefs of fucl\ a confiderable fum as he had already extorted froni her mother ; and therefore thought proper to reprefeh^ himfelf in the moft urgent predicament, that her appre^ henfton, en his account, might be fo alarmed, as to en* gage her in fome enterprize for his advantage, tvhichj otherwife, flie would never have dreamed of undertaking* With this view, after having defcribed his own calamitous fituation, in confequencc ofher prefling intreaties, which he affected to evade, he gave her to underftand, that there was no perfon upon earth to whom he would have recourfe in this emergency ; for which reafon, he was determined to rid himfelf of all his cares at OBce, upon the friendly point of his own faithful fword* Suh FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. 71 Such a dreadful refolution could not fail to operate open the tender paffions of his Dtiicinea , ihe was inftantly feized with an agony of fear and dillraction : her grief manifefted itfelf m a flood of tears, while fhe hung round his neck, conjuring him, in the irolt melting terms, by their mutual love, in which they hd been io happy, to lay afide that fatal determination, which would infallibly involve her in the fame fate ; for ihe took Heaven Xfi witnefs, that fhe would not owe moment furvive the knowledge of his death, He was not deljei^nt in exprefiions of reciprocal re- gard : he extolled her love and lenderrtefs with a moft extravagant eulogium ; and fcemed wrung witii mortal anguifh at the proipe^ of parting for ever fro^n his lovelj' Wilhelmina : but his honour was a (tern and rigid credi- tor, that could not be appeafed, except with his blood ; and all the boon {lie could obtain, by dint of the molt woeful fupphcation, was a promile to defer the executioil of his baleful purpofe, for the fpace of four and twent/ hours, during which fhe hoped Heaven would corapal^ flonate her fufferings, and infpire her with fome contri- vance for their mutual relief. Thus he yielded to her- fervent requcft, rather with a view to calm the prefent tranfports of her forrow, than with any expectation of feeing himlelf redeemed from his fate by her interpofif tion } fuch at leaft were his profcffions when he took hi$ leave, alTuring her, that he would not quit his being be- fore he fhould have devoted a few hours to another inn ttrview with the dear object of his love. Having thus kindled the train, he did' not doubt thai? the mine of his ci"aft WQuld take efFeear the thought of being in tlitj fmalleft confideration a Icffened FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. 73 lefTened in her efteem : nay, fo far did he carry his pre- tcnfions to pundtilio, as to proteft, that, fliould fhe refufe to quiet the fcruples of liis honour, on this fcore, her un- yielding beneficence woiild Hirvc only to haften the exe- cution of his determined purpofe, to withdraw himfelf at once from a life of vanity and misfortune. Tiie more pathetically he pleaded for her compliance, the more ftrenuoufly did Oie refifl his remonftrances. She advanced all the arguments her reafon, love, and terror could fuggefl: ; reminded him of her oath, from which ho could not fuppofe fhe would recede, whatever the confequcnce might be ; and, in concluiion, vowed to Hea- ven, with great folemnity and devotion, that fhe would n:)t furvive the news of his death. Thus, the alternative Ihe offered, was either to retain the chain and be happy in her aiicftion, or forfeit all title to her love, and did in the conviftion of having brought his innocent miftrefs to an untimely grave. His fortitude was not proof againft 'his laft: confidera- tion : *' My favage honour," faid he, " would enable me to endure the pangs of eternal feparation, in the con- hdence of being endowed with the power of ending thefe tortures by the energy of my own hand : but the profpe6t of Wilhelmina's death, and that too occaiioned by my inflexibility, difarms my foul of all her refolution, fwal- lows up the dictates of my jealous pride, and fills my bo- fom with fuch a gufh of tendernefs and forrow, as over- whelms the whole cRconomy of my purpofe ! Yes, in- chanting creature 1 1 facrifice my glory to that irrefift- ible refleftion : and rather than know myfelf the cruel inftrument of robbing the world of fuch perfeliori, con- lent to retain the fatal teftimony of your love." So faying, he pocketed the chain, with an air of in- effable mortification, and was rewarded for his compliance with the moft endearing careffes of his Dulcinea, who, amidft the tumults of his joy, ejaculated a thoufand ac- knowledgments to Heaven, for having bleffed her with the aEeclion of fuch a man, whose honour was unrivalled by Any tiling but las love. Vor. L t K CHAP, f 4 THE ADVENTURES Of CHAP. XVL Mis Juccefs begets a blind fecuritfy by ivhich he is cnce again well Tiigb entrapped in lus Dulcinea's apartment. TN this mtinncr did the crafty Fathom turn to account thofe ingratiating qualifications he inlierited from na- ture ; and maintain, with incredible afliduity and circum- fpeftion, an amorous correfpondence with two domeftic rivals, who watched the conduct of each other with the mofl: indefat' clomeftic turmoils and eternal difquiet. "While the hufband exercifed his reflelion in this man- ner, his innocent mate did not allow the powers of her imagination to reft in idlenefs and floth. Her obferva- tions touching the lofs of the chain were fuch as a fufpi- clous woman, biaffed by hatred and envy, would natu- rally make. To her it feemed highly improbable, that a thing of fuch value, fo carefully dcpofited, iiiould vanifh without the connivance of its keeper, and, without much p xpencc cf conjeand, that he might perfonally difcover the treachery of his pretended friend, ;.nd inflict upon him fuch chaf^ifement as the German's bnital difpclition fhould fugged:, when inflamed by that ipecies cf jirovoca^ion. Had this projcft been brought to bear, Ferainand, in all likelihood, would have been dif- <[Uflllfil from engaging in any future intrigue y but fate or- daiued. FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. 8]^ > ddined, tiiat the dcfign flioulcl be defeated, in order to re*', ferve him for more important occalions. Before the circumllances of the plan could be adjufted, k was his good fortune to meet his Dulcinea In tiie ftreety and in the midft of their mutual condolence on the inter- ruption they had futTered in their correfpondence, he af- fured her, that he would never give his invention- refpite, wntil he lliould have verified the protertations contained in the letter he had delivered to her difcreet agent. This allufion to a billet Ihe had never received did not fail to alarm her fears, and introduce a very mortifying explana- tion, in which he fo accurately defcribed the perfon of the mciienger, that flie forthwith comprehended the plot^ and communicated to our hero her fentiments on that fub- Though he exprefled infinite anxiety and chagrin at this misfortune, which could not fail to raife new ob- ftacles to their love, his heart was a ftranger to- the unea- iinefs he affected ; and rather pleafed with the occaiion, which would furnilh him with pretences to withdraw him- lelf gradually from an intercourfe by rhis time become equally cloying and unprofitable. Being veil acquainted? with the mother's temperament, he guefied the prefenfr lituation of her thoughts, and conclutling ihe would make the jeweller a party in her revenge, he refoh ed from that moment to difcontinue his vifits, and cautioully guard againftany future interview with the lady whom he had rendered lb implacable. It v/as well for our adventurer that his good fortune fo fealbnably interpofcd ; for that fame day, in the after-- noon, he was favoured with a billet from the jeweller's wife, couched in the fame tender ft.le fhe had formerly uled, and importing an earneft defire of feeing him next diiy, at the wonted rendezvous. Altho' his penetration was fufficient to perceive the drift of this meflage ; or at leaft, difcern the rifque he fliould run, in complying with her requeft, yet he was willing to be nsore fully certified of the truth of his fufpicion, and wrote an anfwer to the billet, in which he affured her that he would repair to the place of appointment with all the punctuality of an imp,ticut lover. Neverthelefs, inftcad of performing this^ %6- tH^ AWENTtTR'ES" CJl^ pfomife, he, in the morning, tciolc poft in a publit hdtil^" oppofite to the place of afiignation, in otder to reconnoitre ' the ground) and about noon had the ple.lfure of feeing tht German, wtapped in a tloak, enter the door of his wife's fhe- friend, though the appointment' was fi3ted at live in the evening; Fathom blelTed his good angel foir haTing; conducted himclear of this confpiracy, and kept his ilatiort with great tranquillity, .till the honr of meetings when he behdd his enragtd Thaleftris take" the lame route, aftd enjoyfed hjrr difappointment with ineffable fa- tisfaiiion. Thus favoured with a pretext, he took his leave of her in a letter, giving her to undefftand, that he was no ftranger to the barbarous ihare flie had laid for him, and ' upbraiding her v/ith having made fuch an ungrateful re- turn for all his tenderncfs and attachment. She was not backward in conveying a reply to this expoftulation, which feemed to have been di(^ated in all the diftraction of a proud woman J wlioiees her vengeance baffled, asA\rell as her love difdained. Her letter Was nothing but afuc- ccffion of reproafches, menaces, and incoherent execra- tions. She taxed him with knavery, infenfibility, and dil-' ' fimulation; imprecated a thoufand curfts upon his head, ' and threatened not Only to perfecute his life with all the arts that hell and inalice could infpirc, but alfo to wound him in the pCrfon of hvlfe would not venture to take, Icil ti^e jh^iiband, inftead pt taking he;r advice, t,ouching the y,oung lady, lliould ieek to con>proiiiirc fthe affair, by qffeiring ;her ip marriage ^0 her dettoucher ; a pr.oiFt^* :\\'il^ch, if aqcopted, would overwhelm the mother with ye,x,itio,n a^id .de^ijpHir. He therefore cliofe to truQ: to the efte ivhich he knew his talents would be properjy exercii'ed. Thefe reflexions never occurred, without leavir.g 4 ftrong iniprellion upon the mind of our adventurer, xvhich influenced tis deliberations, in fuch a manner, as at length amounted to a pcrfe^ rtfolution of withdraw- ing himfclf privately fiom a fervice that teemed with di{^ agreeable events ; and of tranfporting hinifelf into the country of his anceftors, which he confidered as the Ca- naan of all able adventurers. But previous to his ap- pearance on th^t ftage, he was deflrous of viliting the metropol's of France, in which he hoped to improve him- felf in the knowledge of men and things, and acquire fuch intelligence as would qualify him to a<^ a more im- portant part upon the Britilh fcene. After having for fome time in luiged thefe proipefls in fecret, he determine ed to accommodate himl'eif with the company and ex- perience of the lyrolefe, whom, under the fpecious title of an aflbciate, he knew he could convert into a very *fer- viceable tool, in forwarding the e^jecution of his own pro- je6ts. Accordingly, the inclination of this confederate was founded by ciiilant hints, and being founii apt, our hero made him privy to his deiign of decamping without beat pi drum i though, at the fame time, he begged his acivicq, touching the method of their departure, that he might retire with as much delicacy as the liature of liich a ftep would permit. Divers coniultations were held upon this fubject, before they adhered to the refolution of makipg their efcape from the afmy, after it Oiould have taken the field in the fpring ; becaufe, in that cafe, they would have frequent opportunities of going abroad on loraging parties, and, cluring one of thefe excuriions, Uiight retire in fuch a manner as to perfuade ttieir companions that they had fallen into the enemy's hands. Agreeable to this determination, the camp w^s no fooner formed in Alface, than our afluciates began to make preparations for their march, ad haci already tal-vCii ^1 the previous meafures for their departure, when an ac- cident 94 THE ADVENTURES OF cidcnt happened, which our hero did not fail to convert to his own advantage : this was no other than the defer- tion of Rcnaido's valer, who, in confequence of a gentle chart ifement, which he had richly merited, thought pro- per to difappear, after having plundered his mafter's port- manteau, which he had ftTced open for the purpofe. Ferdinand, who was the iirft perfon that difcovered the thtft, immediately comprehended the whole adventure, and taking it for granted that the delinquent would neVcr return, reiblved to finifh what the fugitive had imper- feftly performed, Beng favoured with the unreferved confidence of the young coimt, he inftantly had recourie to his bureau, the locks of which he found me.)ns to burfl open, and ex- amining a private drawer, contrived with great art to con- ceal Renuldo's jewels and caih, and made himfelf mafter of the contents without hefitation ; then cutting open his clcak-bag, and ftrewing the tent with his linen and clcathes, began to raife his voice, and produced fuch a cla- moiir as alarmed the whole neighbourhood, and brought a great many officers into the tent. He on this, as on all otlier occafions, performed his cue to a miracle, exprefling confuiion and concern fo na- turally, in his gefturcs and exclamation, that no man cou'd pofably fufpe6l his finccrity ; nay, to fuch a de- gree of fincife did his cunning amount, that when his friend and patron entered, in confequence of an intima- tion he foon received of his lofs, our adventurer exhibi- ted undoubted figns of difrraction and delirium, and fpringing upon Renaldo with all the frantic fury of a bed- lamite, ** Viilain," cried he, " rrfiore the effe.aper fealed up in form of a letter, direfted to his friend, s.nd fecured behind his own faddle, a pair of leathern bags in which his jewels and cam were ufually contained. !So eager was our hero to leave the Tyroleze at a coaiider- , ?.bk diftanre behind, that he rode all night at a rountf pace, witiiout halting, and next morning, found himfelf at a village diftant thirteen good leagiies from any part of the route vhich he and his companion had at firlt refol- ved to purfue. Here thinking hlmrtlf fafely delivered from the caufe of all his apprehenfion, he determined to lie incognito fov- a few days, fo as that he might run no rifque of an acci- dental meeting upon the road with the perfon whofe company he had forfaken ; and accordingly he took pof- il-ffion of an apartment, in whicli he went to reft, defiring 3 lis guide to wake him v/hendinnei- fiiould be ready. Having enjoyed a very comfortable refrefhment of fleep, with his bags under his pillow, he was fummoned accor- ding to his diredVion, and ate a very hearty meal with great tranquillity and internal fatisfaflion.. In the afternoon, he amufed himfelf with happy prefages, and ideal prof- p^&:s of his future fortune, and in the midft of thefe ima- . ginary banqwets, was feized with an inclination of reali- zing his blils, and regaling his eye-fight with the fruits of that fuccefs whicli hod hitherto attended his endeavours. Thus inflamed, he opferied the repofitory, and^ O reader ! v'hat were his refle!? jkjnd could have been purchafed for the tenth part of his trcafure, he would have left the whole fpecies in a ftatpe : the found of the other horfe's foet by degrees grew'mcre and more f.int, and at lafl: altogether died away.' FERDINAND! COUNT FATHOM. loi away. Alannc<^at this circumftance, Fathom halted in the middle of the road, and lillened with the moft fear- ful attention ; but his fenfc of hearing was fainted with nought but the difmal fighings of the trees, that feemed to foretell an approaching ftorni ; accordingly the Hea- vens contracted a more dreary alpcct, the lightning be- gan to gleam, the thunder to roil, and the tempeft raif- jng its voice to a tremendous roar, defcended in a tor- rent of rain. In this emergency, the fortitude of our hero was almoft quite overcome ; fo many concurring circumflances of danger and diftrefs might have appalled the mod un- daunted breaft ; what impreffion then m.uft they have made upon the mind of Ferdinand, who was by no means a man to fet fear at defiance! indeed he had well righ lofl: the uie of his reflexion, and was a^ually invaded to the Ikin, before he could recoiled hlmfclf fo far as to quit the road and feek for fhelrer among the thickets that furrounded him. Having rode fome furlongs into the foreft, he took his flation under a tuft of tall trees, that fcreened him from the llorm, and in that fituation called a council within himfelf, to deliberate upon his next ex- curiion. He perfuaded himfelf, that his guide had defert- ed him for the prefent, in order to give intelligence of a traveller to fome gang of robbers with whom he was connected ; and that he muft of neceffity fall a prey to thofe banditti, unlefs he Ihould have the good fortune to elude their fearch, and difentangle himielf frpm the mazes of the wood. Harrowed with thefe apprehenfions, he rtfolved to commit himfelf to the mercy of the hurricane, as of two evils the leaft, and penetrate ftraight forwards through fome devious opening, until he Ihould be delivered from the foreft. For this purpofe, he turned his horfe's head in a line, quite contrary to the direction of the high roacl which he had left, on the fuppoiltion, that the robbers would purfue that tract in quelt of him, and that they would never dream of his deferting the highway, to traverfe an unknown foreft, amidft the darknefs of fuch a boifterous night. After he had continued in this progrefs, through a luccefilon of groves, and bogs, and thorns, and brakes " ' ' by J03 ' THE ADVENTURES OF (by which, not only his deaths, but alfo his (kin fuffercd in a grievous manner, while every nerve quivered with cagernefs of dilciay, he at length reached an open plain, and purfuing his courfe, in foil hope of arriving at fomc village where his life would be fafe, he defcried a rufl^ jight at a difiance, which he looked upon as the ftar oif his good fortune, and riding towards it at full fpeed, ar- rived at the door of a lone cottage, into which he wa? admitted by an old woman, who underllanding he was a bewildered traveller, received him with great hofpita- lity. When he learned from his hoftefs that there was not another houfe within three leagues, that fhe could accom- xnodate him with a tolerable bed, and his horfe with lodg- ing and oats, he thanked Heaven for his good fortune in ftumblingupon this homely habitation, and determined to pafs the night under the protection of the old cottager, who gave him to underftand that her hufoand, who was a faggot-maker, had gone to the next town tp difpofe of his merchandize, *.nd that, in all probability, he would not return till next morning, on account of the tempef- tuous night. Ferdinand founded the bel-dame with a thoufand artful interrogations, and fhe anfwered with fuch appearance of truth and iimplicity, that he conclu- ded his perfon was quite fecure : and after having been regaled with a difh of eggs and bacon, defired (he would conduct him into the chamber where Ihe propofed he fliould take his repofe. He was accordingly ufliered up by a fort of ladder, into an apartment furnilhed with a ftanding-bed, and almoft half filled with trufles of ftraw. He feemed extremely well pleafed with his lodging, which in reality exceeded his expectation, and his kind landlady cautioning him againft letting the candle approach the combuftibles, took her leave, and locked the door on the outfidc. CHAP, tlRDiNAND COUNT FATHOAl loj! C II A P. XXI. He falls upon Scylluf feeking to avdd Charybdls. FATHOM, whofe own principles taught him to be fuf- picious, and ever upon his guard again ft the trencher j" of iiis fci low-creatures, could have diipenfed with this in- flanceof her care ia confining herguefl: to his chamber, and began to be fcized with ftrange fancies, when he obferved that there was no bolt on the inlide of the door, by which- lie mioht fecure himfelf from intrufion. In confequence of thele fuggeftions, he propofed to take an accurate fur- vey of every object in the apartment ; and in the courfc' of his inq^uiry,- \\as\ the mortification to find the dead body of a man,, liiU wcrm, who had been lately ftabbed, and concealed beneath feveral bundles of ftraw. Such a difcovery could not fail to fill tlxe breafl: of our herb with unlpeakable horror ; for he concluded, that he himfelf would undergo the fame fate before mornings without the interpolltion of a miracle in his favour. la the firft tranfports of his dread he ran to the window with a view to efcape by that outlet, and found his flight cfFedually obft-rufted by divers ftrong bars of iron. Theiif his heart began to palpitate, his hair to briftle up, and liis knees to totter ; his thoughts teemed with prefages of death and deilruction ; his confcience rofe up in judgment againft him, and he underwent a fevere paroxyfm of dif^ may and difi:rat;on. His fpirits were agitated into a flate of fermentation that produced afpecies ofrefolution a-kiu to that which is infpired by brandy or other flrong li- quors, and by an impulfe that feemed fupernatural, he was immediately huiried into iiieafures for his o\7n pre- fervation. What upon a lefs interefting occafion his imagination Jurfi: not propofe, he now executed without fcruple or remorfe : he undrelTed the corpfe that lay bleeding among the ftraw, and conveying it to the bed in his arms, de- poiited it in the attitude of a perfon who fleeps at his eafe ; then he extinguilhed the light, took polieffion of tlie place from whence the body had heen removed, and holding i#4 THE ADVENttfRtS (JF holding a piftol ready cocked in each hand, waited for tH<^ iequel with that determined purpofe which is often the immediate production of defpair. About midnight he heard the found of feet ufcending the ladder, the door was foftly opened, he faw the ihadow of two men ftalking to- \rarcls the bed, a dark lanthorn being unfiirouded, dirrc- ted tlieir aim to the fuppofed fleep^r, a;nd he that held it thruft a poignard to his heart ; the force of the b}o\V' made a compreflion on the chcft, and n fort of groan if- fued from the windpipe of the ddfund ; the ftroke waiT repeated, without producing :> repetition of the note, j!b that the afiaflins concluded the work Was etFcdtually done, and retired for tiie prefent, with a deiign to return and riile the deceafed at their ieiftire. Never had our hero fpent a moment in fuch agony as he felt during this operation ; the whole furface of his body was covered with a cold fweat, and his nerves were relaxed with an univerfal palfy : in fhort, he remained in a trance that, in all probability, contributed to his fafety 5 for had he retaitied the ufe of his fehfes, he might have been difcovered by the tranfports of his fear. The iirHi ufe he made of his retrie\^ed rsc6lleftionj was to perceivii that the aflaffins had left the doer open in their retreat ;' and he would have inftantly availed himfelf of this theii* neglect, by iallying out upon themj at the hazard of his life, had not he been rcftrained by a converfation he; over- heard in the room' beicw, importiilg that the ruffian^ were going to ftt out upon another expedition, in hopes' of finding more prey : they accordingly departed, after' having laid ftrong injunctions upon the old woman tt>' keep the door fdt locked during their abfence and Fer- dinand took his refolution wthout fafther delay. So'foori' as, by his conjecture, the robbers Were at a fufficient dif- tance from the houfc, he rofe from his lurking-place, ilioved foftly towards the bed, and rummaging the pockets of the deceafed, found a purfe well ftored with ducats, of which, together with a lilver watch and a diamond' ring, he immediately pofTefTed himfelf without fcruple ; then dcfcending with great care and circumfpeftion into the lower apartment, (tood before the old beldame, bcfdrC flie had the \c:^i\ intimation of his approach. Accuflome^* FEROmAND COUNT FATHOM. id; Accuftomed as flie was td the trade of blood, the hoary hag did not behold this apparition without giving figns of infinite terror and aftonifhment, believing it was ho othfir thin the fpirit of her fecond gneft who had been murdered ; Ihe fell upon her knees, and began to recoiti* mend lierfelf to the proteftion of the faints, croffing herfelf with as much devotion as if ilie had been en- iitled to the particular care and attention of Heaven. Nor did her anxiety abate, when fhe was undeceived in this her fiippolition, arid underftood it was Ho phantom, but the real fubftance of the ftranger, who. Without flay- ing to upraid her with the enormity of her crimes, com- manded her, on pain of immediate death, to produce his horfc; to which being conducted, he fet her upon the fadJle without delay, and mounting behind, invefted her with the management of the reins, fvVeiring, in a moft peremptory tone, that the only chance fhe had for her life, was in directing him fafely to the next town ; and that fo foon as fhe ihould give him the leaft caufe to doubt her fidelity in the performance of that tafk, he would, on the ihftant, dtfl the part of her executioner. This declaration had its effect upon the withered He* cate, who, with many fupplications for mercy and for- givenefs, promifed to guide him in fafety, to a c^rtairi village at the diftance of two leagues, where he might- lodge in fecurity, and be provided with a frefti horfe or other convenience, for purfuing his intended route. Oil thefe condition?, he told her, Ihe might deferve his cle- mency, and they accordingly took their departure to- gether, fhe being placed aft: ide upon the faddle, holding the bridle in one hand, and a fwitch in the Other ; and tour adventurer fitting on the crupper, fu per intending her tondudt, and keieping the muzzle of a piftol clofe at hef ear. In this ec^uipage, they travelled acrofs part of the fame wood, in which his guide had forfaken him *, and it is not to be fuppofed that he pafTed his time in the moft agreeable reverie, while he found himfelf involved in the lybyrinth of thofe fhadcs, which he confidered as tlie haunts of robbery and ailaffination. Common fear was a comfortable fcnfation to what he felt in this excurfion.'"' The firfl: fleps'he- had taken fot Vol. L f O his io6 THE ADVENTURES OF his prefcrvation, were the effects of meer inftinft, while his faculties were extinguifhed or fupprelVed by defpair ; but, now as his refledlion began to recur, he was haunt- ed by the moft intolerable apprehenfions. Every whif- per of the wind through the thickets, was fwelled into the hoarfe menaces of murder, the fhaking of the boughs v/as ccnftruCd into the brandilhing of poignards, and every ihadow of a tree became the apparition of a ruiHan eager for blood. In fhort, at each of thefe occurrences he felt what was infinitely more tormenting i than the ftab of a real dagger ; and at every frefla filip of his fear, he afted as remembrancer to his conduftrefs, in a new volley of imprecations, importing that her life was abfolutely con- nefted with his opinion of his own fafety. Human nature could not long fubfiCl under fuch com- plicated terror : at laft he found himfclf clear of the forcft, and was blefied with the diftant view of an inhabited place : he then began to excrcife his thoughts upon a new fubjedt. He debated with himfclf, whether he fhould make a parade of his intrepidity and public fpirit, by dif- clofing the atchievement, and furrendering his guide to the penalty of the law ; or leave the old hag and her accom- plices to the remorfe of their own confciences, and pro- ceed quietly on his journey to Paris, in undifturbed pof- fefiion of the prize he had already obtained. This lafl: Aep he determined to take, upon rccolle and feiz- ing his fword that lay upon a table, would have fevrrely punilhed the prefumption of his fervant, had not he been reftrained by the entrance of Ferdinand, who, with a peremptory corntenHnce, gave him to underftand that the valet had acted at his immediate inftigation ; and that he was come, as the Englifhman's friend, to concert with him proper meaiures for keeping the appointment they had made at their laft meeting. This melTage effcidluaily calmed the German, who was not a little mortified to find himfelf fo difagreeably dif- turbed. He could not htip curung the impatience of his antagonift, and even hinting that he would have aSted more like a gentleman and good chriitian, in expreffing ^ defire of feeing the affair accommodated, as heknewhim^ fclf to be the aggrefior, confequcntly the firft offender a- gainfl the laws of politenefs and good fellowfliip. Fa-^ thorn finding him in a fit temper of mind, took the op-^ portunity of alTcnting to the reafonabienefi of his obfer- Tation : FERDINAND COUNT FATH0M. 1 17 nation : he ventured to condemn the impetuolify of the? baronet, who, he perceived, was extren>el3r nice ^nd (crir- pulous in tlic puntiiios of honour ; and faid it was a pitjr that two gentlemen fliouki forfeit each other's friendlhip, much Ids expofc their lives for fuch a frivolous caufe. *' My dciir Count ! cried the AYeftphaiian, I am charmed to hiid your fcntiir.ents fo conformable to my own ; ifi an honourable caufe, I defpife all danger j my courage;^ thank Heaven { has been m.anifelted in many public en- gagcaien s, as well as in prirvate rencounters; but, tQ break with my friend, whofe eminent virtues I gdmire, anct even to feck his life, on fuch a fcandalous occasion, jfor a little iniigr.ificant whore, who, i fuppoft, took th<5 advantage of our intoxlcvttion, to foment the tjuarrel, by Heaven ! my conicience cannot digefl: it." Having exprr^fl'^-d himfclf to this purpofe, he waited impatiently for the reply of Ferdinand, who, after a paufb of dehberation, ofiereJ his Services in the way of media- tion j though he obferved it was a matter of great deii- *cacy, and the event altogether uncertain. " Neverthe- lefs," added our adventurer, " I will Itriye to appeafe the knight, who, I hope, will be induced by my remonitran- ces to forget the unlucky accitlent which hath fo difk- greeably interrupted your nvutual friendlhip." ['he Ger- man thanked him for this proof of his regard, which yield- ed him more fatisfadtion on account of the chcv^dief than ofhimfeif: "For, b/ the tombs of my fathers !'* cried he, " I have fo little concern for my pcrfonal fafe- ty, that if my honour A-ere interefted, I durfl; oppofe ray- fclf fingly to the whole ban of the empire ; and I am now ready, if the chevalier requires it, to give him the rendezvous in the forefl of Scnlis, either on hoifeback or on foot, where this conteft may b terminated with the life of one or both of us." Count Fathom, with a view to chaftife the Weflpha- lian for this rhodomontade, told him with a mortifying ^ir of InditTerence, that if they were both bent upon taking the field, he would fave himfelf the trouble of intcrpo- iing farther in the affair ; and deiired to know the hour 3t which it would fuit him to take the air with the baso- |it : the Other, not a little einbarralTed bv this queftion, %d z^i THE ADVENTURES OF faid with a faultering tongue, he fhould be proud to obey ^e chevalier's orders j but, at the fame time, owned he ihould be much better pleafed if our hero would execute the pacific propofal he had made. Fathom accordingly promifed to exert himfelf for that purpofe, returned to *he knight, with whom he aiTumed the merit of having -tranquillized the rage of an incenfed barbarian, who was aiow difpofed to a reconciliation upon equal terms ; the _Wronet overwhelmed him v/ith carefics and compliments tipon his friendlhip and addrefs ; the parties met that fame ^forenoon, as if by accident, in Fathom's apartment, where they embraced each other cordially, exchanged apologies, and renewed their former correfpondcnce. ' Our adventurer thought he had good reafon to congra- tulate himfelf upon the part he afted in this pacification,: iie was treated by both with fignal marks of particular affection and efteem. The count prefled him to accept, as a token of his attachment, a iword of very curious workmanfhip, which he had received in a prefent from a certain prince of the empire : the knight forced upon his iinger a very fplendid diamoml ring, as a teftimony of his ;gratitude and efteem : but there was ftill another perfon to be appe^ed, before the peace of the whole company <:ould be eftabliftied. This was no other than the abbe, from whom each of the reconciled friends received at din- jier a billet couched in thefe words j " I have the honour to lament the infinite chagrin ?nd ** mortification that compels me to addrefs myfelf in this ** manner to a perfon of your rank and eminence, whom *' I ihould do myfelf the pleafwre of waiting .upon in per- .** fon j were I not prevented by the inisfortvme of my *' nofe, which was laft night moft cruelly difarranged, by ** a violent contufion I had the honour to receive in at- ** tempting to compofe that unhappy fracas at the houfe f of madam la Maquerelle ; and what puts the finilhing ** ftroke to my milhap is, my being reudered incapable of" ** keeping three or four ailignations with ladies of fafliion, ** by whom I have the honour to be particularly efteem- ** ed. The disfiguration of my nofe, the pain I have ^ undergone, with the difcompofure of brain which it .* produced, I could bear as a philofopher ; but the di- " appointment FERDINAND' COUNt FATHOM. i tf *' appointment of the ladies, my glory will not permit' ** me to overlook : and as you know the injury was fuC-' '* tained inyourfervice,! have thepleafure to hope you wilt ^* not refufe to grant fuch reparation as will be acceptable? ** to a gentleman, who has the honour to be, with inviola- ** ble attachment, ** Sir, your mbft devoted flave, " Pepin Clbthaire Charlc Henri Louis Barnabe dc " Fumier." ThisepifVlc was fo equivocal, thatthe perfons to whom it was addrcfTed did not know whether or not they ought" to interpret the contents into a challenge ; when our hero obferved, that the anibiguity of his expreffions plainly proved there was a door left open for accommodation ; and prbpofed tliat they fhould forthwith vilit the writer' at his own apartment ; they accordingly followed his ad- vice, and found the abbe in his njorning-gown and flip- pers, with three huge night-caps on his head, and a crape hat-band tied over the middle of his face, by way of band- age to his ndfe. He received his vifitors wiih the moft ri- diculous folemnity, being ftill a ftranger to the purport of their errand; but foon as the W/ftphalian declared they were come in confequence of his billet, in order fo , alk pardon for the undeligned offence they had given, his features retrieved their natural vivacity,, and he profef^- fed himfelf perfectly fatisiied with their polite acki'ow- tedgement. Then they condoled him upon the evil plight of his iiofe, and feeing fome marks upon his fliirt^ aiked with feeming concern, if he had loft any blood in the fray. To this interrogation he replied, that he had ftill a ftifiicient quantity left for the occaftons of his friends ; and that he fhould deem it his greateft glory to expend the laft drop of it in their {ervice. Matters beirg thus amicably adjufted, they prevailed upon him to uncafe his nofe, which retained no figns o the outrage he had fuffered ; and the amufements of the day were concerted. It was in confequence of this plan that, after the comedy, they were entertained at the. count's lodgings, where quadrille was propofed by the abbe, as the moft innocent paftinie, and the propofal waa immediately 5 U THE ADVENTURES of immediately embraced by all prefcnt, and by none wittl more alarcity than by our adventurer, who without put- ting forth a moiety of his terror, went home with twenty louis clear gain : though, far from believing liimftlf greatly fuperior to the reft of the party in the artifice? of pljy, he juftly fufpe^led that they had concealed their ikili, with a view of ftrlpping him on fome other oc- cafion ; for he could not fuppof'i, that perfons of their fi- gure and character (hould be^ in reality, fuch novices as they affedteci to appear; CHAP. XXIV. Hi cvtrlooks the advances ofhis friends J and/marts feverel^ for his negleft. STeeled with this cautious maxim, he guarded himfelf from their united endeavours, in fundry fubfequent attacks, by which his firil: conjecture was confirmed, and ftill came off conqueror, by virtue of his unparalleled fi- nefle and dilcretion : till at length they feenied to defpair of making him their prey, and the count to drop feme hints, importing a defire of feeing him more clofely un- ited to the views and intereft of their triumvirate. But Ferdinand, who was altogether felfifh, and quite folitary in his profpeiits, difcouraged all thofe advances ; being refoived to trade upon his own bottom only, and to avoid all fuch connexions v^^ith any perfon or fbciety whatever ^ much more, with a fet of raw adventurers whofe talents he defpifed. With thefe fentiments, he ftill maintained the dignity and referve of his firft appearance among themj and rather inhanced than diminifhed that idea of import- ance which he had infpired at the beginning ; becaufe, befides his other qualifications, they gave him credit for the addrefs whh which he kept himfdf fuperior to theif united deflgns. While he thus enjoyed his pre-eminence, togethci* with the fruits of his fuccefs at play, which he managed fo difcreetly, as never to incur the reputation of an ad- venturer } he one day chanced to be at the ordinary then. FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. isi when the company was furprifed by the entrance of fuch a figure as had never appeared before in that place. This was no other than a perfon habited in the cxae favage monlier or maniac, and confulted their fafcty by ftarting up from table, and drawing their fwords. The Englifliman feeing fuch a martial apparar tus produced agamft him, recoiled two or three fteps, fay- ing, ** Waunds, a believe the people are all bewitched : what, do they take me for a beaft of prey ? is there no body here that knows Sir Stentor Stile, or can fpeak to me in my own lingo ?" He had no fooner pronounced thefe words, than the baronet, with marks of infinite fur- prife, ran towards him, crying, *' Good Heaven ! Sir Stentor, who expelled to meet with you in Paris ?" Upon which, the other eying him very earneftly, " Odds heart- likens, cried he. my neighbour Sir Giles Squirrel, as I ^m. a living foul !" With thefe words, he flew upon him lik? a tyger, kiffed him from ear to ear, demoliflied his peri- wig, and difordered the whole osconomy of his drefs, to the no fmall entertainment of the company. Having well nigh ftifled his countryman with embraces. Vol. I. Q^ f and 123 THE ADVENTURES OF and befmeared himfelf with pulville from head to foof,- he proceeded in this manner ; " Mercy upon thee, knighr, fhou art lb tranfmographied and bedaubed, and bedizened, that thou m^'Ught rob thy own mother without fear of information. Look ye here now, I will be truired, if ther very bitch that was brought up in thy own bolcm, knows thee again. Hey, fweetlips, here huffy, damn the tuoad, do'ftn't know thy old meafter. Ey, ey, thou may'll imell till Chriftmas. I'll be bound to be hanged, knight, if the creature's nofe an't foundered by the damned {link- ing perfumes you Iiave got, among you." Thefe compliments being paft, tlie two knights fat down by one another ; and Sir Stentor being alked by his neighbour upon what errand he had crofled the fea, gave him to underftand, that he had come to France, in confequence of a wager with fquire Snafiie, who had laid- a thoufand pounds that he. Sir Stentor, would not travel to Paris by himfelf, and, for a whole month, appear every day at a certain hour, in the public walks, Without wear-. jng any other drefs than that in which he faw him. *' The fellow has got no more ftufF in his pate, continued, this- polite ftranger, than a jack-afs, to think I could not find my way hither, thof I could not jabber your Frenclk lingo. Kcod ! the people of this country are fliarp e- nough to find out your meaning, when you want to fpend any thing among them : and as for the matter of drefs^ bodikins ! for a thoufand pounds I would engage to live inthemidft of them, andfhew myfelf without anycloaths at all. Odd's heart ! a true-born Eng'.ifhman need not be afraid to Ihew his face, nor his back- fide neither, with the beft Frenchman that ever trod the ground. Thof we Englifhmen don't beplaider our doublets with gold and filver, I believe as how we have our pockets better lined than moft of our neighbours ; and for all my bit of a fuftian frock, that coft me in all but forty Ihillings, I believe, between you and me, knight, I have more duft in my fob ti>an all thefe powdered fparks put together* But the worll of the matter is t!:is ; here is no folid belly timber in this country : one can't have a flice of a delicate firloin, or nice piece of beef, for love nor money. Apize u- pon them ! I could get no eatables upon the ruoad, but what FERrHNAND COUNT 'FATHOM. '^^ -wrhat tliey call Bully, which looks likethe fiefTi ofPharoah's lean kine ftewed into rags and tatters ; and then tlieir pea- john, pcajohn, rabbet them ! one would think every old wo- man of this kingdom hatched pit] gcons fromher own body.'* It is nor to be I'uppofed, that fuch an original fat un- obfervtd. The French and other foreigners, who had never been in England, were ftiuck dumb with amazq- ment at the knight's appearance and and demeanour. He and cur adventurer had been fellow-lodgers for fome time, and, according to the laudable cuilom of thefe days, had hitherto remained as much efl:ranged to one another, as jf they had lived on oppofite fides of the globe ; but of late, the Perfian Teemed to regard our hero with particu- lar attention : when they chanced to meet on the flair- cafe, or elfewhere, he bowed to Ferdinand with great fo- lemnity, and complimented him with the Pas : he evea proceeded, in the courfe of this communication, to open his mouth, and falute him with a good morrow, and fometimes made the common remarks upon the weather. Fathom, who was naturally complaifant, did not difcou- rage thefe advances : on the contrary, he behaved to him with marks of particular refpedt, and ouq day defired the favour of his company to breakfaft. This invitation the ftranger declined with due acknow- ledgement, on pretence of being out of order , and in the mean time, our adventurer bethought himfelf of quif- tioning the landlord csncerning his outlandilh gueft. His curiolity was rather inflamed than fatisfied with the in- formation he could obtain frqm this quarter ; for all he learned was, that the Perfian went by the name of Ali Bcker, and that he had lived in the houfe for the fpace of four months, in a moft folitary and parf^monious man- ner, without being viiited by one living foul ; that, for fome time after his arrival, he had been often heard to groan difmally in the night, and even to exclaim in an un- known language, as if he had laboured under fome grie- vous afflidfipn j and though the firft tranfports of his grief had fubfided, it was eafy to perceive, he ftill indulged a deep-rooted melancholy, for the tears were frequently Qhfcrvc^ FERDINAND COUNT FATHdM. iji tJbferved to trickle down his beard. The commiflaire of the quarter had at firit ordered this Oriental to be vratcb- ed in his out-goings, according to the maxims of the French police ; but his Hfe wa9 found fo regular and in- offeniive, that this precaution was fbon fet afide. Any man of humane fentiments, from the knowledge of thefe particulars, would hive be^^n prompted to offer his fcrvices to the forlorn itranger : but a? our hero was de- void of all thefe infirmities of human nature, it was ne- tiiflfary that other motives ihould produce the fame effe^L : his curiolity, therefore, joining witii the hopes of con- verting the confidence of Ali to his own emolument, efFo(flua!ly impfelled him towards his acquaintance ; and in a tittle time they began to relilh the converfation of each other : for, as the reader may have already obferved^ Fathom poffcired all the arts of ialinuation ; and had dil^ cernment enough to perceive an air of dignity in the Per- iian, which the humility of his circumftantes could not conceal. He was, moreover, a man of good underftand- ing, not without a tinl:ure of letters, perfectly well-bred, tho' in a ceremonious ftile ; extremely moral in his difi courfe, and fcrupuloufly nice in his notions of honour. ' Our hero conformed himfelf in all refpe^ls, to the other's opinions, and managed his difcretion fo as to pafs Upon him for a gentleman reduced by misfortunes ta the exercife of an employment which was altogether un- fuitable to his birth and quality. He made earneft and repeated tenders of his good offices to the ftranger, and prelTed him to make ufe of his purfe, with fuch cordial perfeverance, that at length All's referve was overcome, and he condefcended to borrow of him a fmall fum, xvhich, in all probability, faved his life ; for he had been driven to the utmoft extremity of want, before he wou.d accept of this affiftance. Fathom, having gradually flole into his good graces, began to take notice of many piteous lighs that elcaped him, in the moments of their intercourfe, and fecmed to denote an heart fraught with wo ; and on pretence of ad- miniftring confoiation and counfel, begged leave to know the caufe of his diftrefs j obferving that his mind would be diiburthened by fuch communicition, and perhaps his R 2 grief rys- THE ADVENTURES df grief alleviated by fome means which they might jbintiT' concert, and execute in his behalf. AH, thus folicited, would often fhake his head with marks of extreme forrow and dcfpondencc, and, while the tears gufhed from his eyes, declared that his diftrefs wasp beyond the power of any remedy but death, and that by making our hero his confidenti he fhould only extend his- 7>nhappinefstoa friend, without feeling the leaft remif- lion ot his own torture. Notwithftanding thofe repeated declarations, Ferdinand, who was well enough acquaint- ed with the mind of man, to know that fuch importuni- ty is feldom or never difagreeable, redoubled his inftan- ces, together with his expreflions si fympathy and ef- teem, until the ftr,anger was prevailed upon to gratify his cnriolity and benevolence. Having therefore fe- Gured the chamber-door, one night, whiie all the reft of" the family was aflecp, the unfortunate Hali difclofed him- i'cif in thefe v/ords. G H A P. XXVI. lie MiJIory of the mhle CaflHtatj. I Should be ungrateful, as well as unwife, did I' longer refill the deiire you exprefs to know the particulars of that deftiny which hath driven n\t to this miferable difguifc, and rendered me in all confiderations the moft- wretched of men. I have felt your fritndfhip, am con- todeiTt of your honour, and though my misfortunes are ilich as can never be repaired, becaufe 1 am utterly cut off from hope, which is the wretch's laft comfort, yet I m.ay, "by your meansj be enabled to bear them with fome dcgr^ of fortitude and refignation. Know then, my name is riot Hali, neither am 1 of Pcriian extrKfiion. I had once the honour to own my- felf a Caftjlian, and was, under the appellation of Don rfiego de Zelos, refpefted as the head of one of the moft' ancient families of that kingdom. Judge then how fe- vere that diftrefs muft be, which compels a Spaniard to renounce his coimtry, his honours, ami his namre. My, ytitk'. l^ERBINAND COUNT FATHOM. r^^' youth was not fpent in Inglorious eafe, neither did it wafte unheeded in the rolls of fame : before 1 had attained th& age of nineteen, 1 was twice wounded in battle ; I once fortunately recovered the ftandard of the regiment to which r belonged, after it had been feized by the enemy ; and- at another occalion made Ihift to hvc the life of my Colonel when he lay at the mercy of an enraged barba- rian. He that thinks I recapitulate thefe particulars out of dftentation, does wrong to the unhappy Don Diego dc ijelos, who, in having performed thefe little aSls of gaW lantry, thaiks he has done nothing, but fimply approv- ed hin>felf worthy of being called a Caftilian. I meaa' only to do juilice to my own character, and to make yoti' acquainted with one of the mod remarkable incidents of' my life. It v/as my fate, during my third campaign, to- command a troop of horfe in the regiment of Don Gon- zales OrguUo, between whom and my father a family^ feud had long been maintained with great enmity; and- that gent4eman did not leave me without reafon to belicv he rejoiced at the opportunity of ex^rciling his refentment Upon his adverfary's fon ; for he with-held from me that countenance which my fellow-officers enjoyed, and found means to fubjedl me to divers mortifications, of which X was not at liberty to complain. Thefe I bore in filence,, for fome time, as part of my probation in the charafSter of a foldier ; refolved, neverthelefs, to employ my intereft- at court, for a removal into another corps, and to take feme future opportunity of explaining my fentiments ta' Don Gonzales, upon the injuflice of his behaviour. While I animated myfelf with thefe feniiments againffe-' the difcouragements I underwent, and the hard duty to which I was daily- expofed, it was our fate to be concern- ed in the battle of Saragofla, where our regiment was fo" feverely handled by the EnglifK infentry, that it was for- ced to give ground with the lofs of one half of its officers and men. Don Gonzales, who adled as brigadier in ano- ther wing, being infornied of our fate, and dreading the difgrace cf his corps, which had never turned back to the. enemy, put fpurs to his horfe, and riding acrofs the field at full fpeedj rallied our broken fquadrons, and led uai hack back to the charge, with fuch intrepidity of behaviour,, jfe did not fail to infpire us all with uncommon courage arid alacrity : for my own part, I thought myfelf doubly in- terefted to diftinguilh my valour , not only on account of my own glory, but likewife on the fuppofitioh, that as I WAS acVing under the eye of Gonzales, my condudl would be narrowly obferved. i therefore exerted myfelf with unulual vigour, and as he began the attack with the remains of my troop, fought clofe by his fide during the reft of the engagement, I even acquired his applaufe in the very heat of battle : when his hat was fh-uck off, and his horfe fell under him, I accommodated and remounted him upon my own, and having feizcd for my otvn ufe another that belonged to a common troo[>er, attended this Hern commander as before, and fecoiided him in all his repeated efforts ; but it was itnpofllble to withftand the numbers and impetuolity of the foe, and Don Gonzales having had the mortification to fee his regiment cut in pieces, and the greateft part of the army routed, vT'as fain to yield to the fortune of the day ; yet he retii^'ed as became a man of honour and a Caftilian ; that is, he marched off with great deliberation^ in the rear of the Spanifh troops, and frequently faced about to check the purfult of the enemy. Indeed, this cxercife of his courage had well nigh coft him his life ; for, in one of thefe wheelings, he was left almofl: alortcj^ and a fmail party of the Portuguefe horfe had aluall^ cut off our communication with the retreating forces of Spain. In this dilemma, we had no other chance for faving our lives and liberty, than th:-t of opening a paffage, fword lit hand ; and this was wh^t Gonzales inftantly refolved to attempt. We accordingly recommended our fouls to God, and charging the lineabreaft of another, bore down all oppofition, and were in a fair way ofaccomphfliing our retreat, without further danger; but thegallant OrguDo, in croffing acvitch, had the misfortune to be thrown from his horfe, and was almoft the fame inftant overtaken by one of the Portuguese dragoons, whofe fword was already fufpended over his head, as he lay half ftunned with his fall; when I rode up, I difchargetl a piftoi in the ruffian's brain. FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. iji brain, and feating my colonel on his horfc, had the gOQ4 fortune to condud him to a place of fafety. Here he was provided with fuch :iccommodatior> as hif cafe required ; for he had been wounded in the battle^ and dangerpully bruifed by his fall, and when all the ncr ceflary fteps were taken towards his recovery, I defire^ to know if he had any fui'ther commands for my fervice, heing refolved to jom the a^'my without delay. I thought proper to communicate this queftign by nicfiage, becaufc he had not fpoke one word to me during our retre^ti notwithflaiiding the good office he had received at my hands ; a rt-ferve which J attributed to his pride, and rc- fented accordingly. He no fooner undcrftood my inten- tion, than he delired to fee me hi his apartment, and, ^ near as I can remember, fpoke to this eiledi: : < Were your father Don Alonzo alive, I fliould now, in conlequence of your behaviour, banifli every fuggef- tion of refentment, and folicit his friend {hip with great fincerity. Yes, Don Ditgo, your virtue hath triumphed over that enmity I bore ypur houfe, and I upbraid myfelf with the ungenerous treatment you have lutfered under nny command. But it is not enough for me to withdraw that rigour which it was unjuft to exercifc, and would be wicked to maintain : I muft likewife atone for the inju- ries you have fuliained, and make fome fuitable acknow- ledgements for that life which I have twice to-day owed to your valour and generolity. Whatever intereft I have at court, fliall be employed in your behalf ; and I have other defigns in your favour, which ihall be difclofed induefea- fon. Meanwhile, I defire you will flill add one obligation to the debt which I have already incurred, and carry this billet, in perfon, to my Ellifania, who, from the news of this fatal overthrow, mull be in defpair upon my account. So faying, he prefented a letter direifted to his lady, which I received in a tr^nfport of joy, with expreflions fuitable to the occafipn, and imm.ediately fet out for his country houfe, which happened to be about thirty leagues from the fpot. This expedition was equally glorious and interefting : for my thoughts upon the road were engrof- fed by the hope of feeing Don OrguUo's daughter and Jjeircis Antqnia, who was reporte/i to be a lady of great beauty, ,is6 THE ADVENTURES OF ;beauty, and the moft amiable accomplifhments. How.- ;ver ridiculous it may feem, for a man to conceive a paf- iion for an obietl one eye, I not only admitted into my houfe, for the improvement of my daughter, but even diftingiiillied with particular marks of confidence and favour ; little thinking he had cither inclination or capacity to debauch the fentiments of my child. ] was rejoiced beyond mea- fiirc, to k-i with what alacrity ihe received his leflbns, with what avidity ftie liftened to his difcourfe, which was always equally mora!, inftruling, and entertaining. ' Antonia fcemcd to vie with me, in expreflions of re^ fard for this'accompiilhed flranger, whom flie could not hf^lp funpofing to be a perfon ofrank and family, redu- ced to his preknt ntuation, by fome unfortunate viciffitudc of fat-'. 1 was difpofed to concur with this opinion, and actually conjured him to make me his confident, with fuch protefrations, as left hirn no room>to doubt my hon- onr and beneficence ; but he ftill perfilted in declaring h-imfelf the foil of an obfcure mechanic in Bohemia; an er'i'iin to whl.h fur^ly no man would pretend, who had the FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. 145 the leaft claim to nobility of birth. While I was thus un- deceived in my conjefture touching his birth and quality^ I was confirmed in an opinion of his integrity nd mode- ration, and looked upon him as a man of honour, in de- fpite of the lownefs of his pedigree. Neverthelefs, he was at bottom a moft perfidious wretch, and all this modefty and felf-denial were the effects of the moft villanous dif- fimulation, a cloak under which he, unfufpefted, robbed' me of my honour and my peace. Not to trouble you with particulars, the recital of which would tear my heart-ftrings with indignation and remorfe, I fiiall only bbferve, that, by the power of his in- fernal infinuation, he fafcinated the heart of Serafina, brought over Antonia herfelf to the interefts of his paf- fion, and at once detached them both from their duty and religion. Heaven and earth ! how dangerous, how irrefiftible is the power of infatuation 1 while I remained in the midft of this blind fecurity, waiting for the nup- tials of my daughter, and indulged myfelf with the vain profpe^t of her approaching felicity, Antonia found means to protradl the negociation of the marriage, by re- prefcnting that it would be pity to deprive Serafina of the opportunity ihe then had of profiting by the Germaii's inftrudlions j and upon that account I prevailed upon Don Manuel to bridle the impatience of his love. During this interval, as I one evening enjoyed the cool air in my own garden, I was accofted by an old duenna, who had been my nurfe, and lived in the family fince the time of my childhood. " My duty, faid fhe, will no lontjcr permit me to wink in filence, at the wrongs I fee you daily fufl!er. Difmifs that German from your houfc, without delay, if you refpeft the glory of your name, and the rights of our holy religion : the ftranger is an abominable heretic ; and, grant Heaven I he may not have already poifpn^ the minds of thofe you hold moft dear." I had been extremely alarmed at the begining of this addrefs, but finding the imputation limited to the ar- ticle of religion, in which, thank God, I am no bigot, I recovfred my lerenity of difpofition, tUankeJ the old wo- man for her zeal, commended her piety, and encouraged her f44 riE ADVENt'uiil^S OF her to pei'fevere in making obfervatioh on fucli tut]c(isSi fbould concern my honour and my quiet. We live in fuch a world of wickcdnefs and fraud, that a man cannot be too vigilant in his own defence : had I employed fuch fpies from the beginning, I (Kould, in alt probability, ' have been at this day in poflelHon of every comfort that renders life agreeable. The duenna, thus authorized, employed her fagacity with fuch fuccefs, that I had reafon to fufpedt the German of a defign upon the heart of Serafina ; but as the prefumptions did not amount to conviction, I contented m\ felf with exiling him from my houfe, under the pretext of having difcovered that he tras an enemy to the catholic church ; and forthwith ap- pointed a day for the celebration of my daughter's mar- riage with )on Manuel de Mendofa. I could eafily perceive a cloud of melancholy overfpread the faces of Se- rajfifia and her mother, when I declared thefe my refo- lutions ; but as they maue no objection to what I propo- fcd, I did not, at that time, enter into an explanation of (he true motives that influenced jny conduct. Both par- ties were, probably, afraid of fuch expoilulatibn. Meanwhile, preparations were made for the fpoufals of Serafina ; and, notwithftp.nding the anxiety I had un- dergone, on account of her connexion with the Gkrman, I began to think that her duty, and her glory, had triumph- ed over all fuch low-born confiderations, if ever they had been entertained ; becaufe flie, and even Antonia, feemed to expect the ceremony with refignation, though the fea- tures of both ftill retained evident marks of concern, which 1 willingly imputed to the mutual profpeeft, which hath wreck- ed my hopes. T\7o days before the appointed union of Don Manuel and Serafina, I was informed by the duemia, that while flie accompanied Antonia's waiting-maid at church, fhb had feen her receive a billet from an old woman, who,- kneeling at fccr tide, had conveyed it in fuch a myfterious manner, as wakentd the duenna's apprehenfions about: her young lady ; ihe had therefore haftencd home to com- municate this piece of inrelligfencc, that i might have an 3 oppor- FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. 14; bpportunity of examining the meflenger before fhe (hould have time to depofit her truft. I eould not help (hivering with fearful prelages upon this occafion, and even abhor- ring the perfon to whofe duty and zeal I was beholden for the intelligence, even while I endeavoured to perfuade Inyfelf, that the inquiry would end in the detection of fome paultry intrigue between the maid and her own gal- larit. I intercepted her in returning from church, and com- manding her to follow me to a convenient place, extorted from her, by dint o^ threats, the fatal letter, which I read to this effe6\ : *' The whole bufinefs of my life, O divine Serafina ! ** will be to repay that affedlion I have been fo happy as to engage. With what tranfport then (hall I obey your " fummons, in perfor ning that enterprize, which will " refcue you from the bed of a detefted rival, and put " myfelf in full poirellion of a jewel, which I value infi- '* nitely more than life. Yes, adorable creature, I have ** provided every thing for our efcape, and at midnight " will attend you in your own apartment, from whence *' you (hall be conveyed into a land of liberty and peace, " where you will unmolefted enjoy the purity of that re- " ligion you have efpoufed, and in full fecurity blefs the " arms of your ever faithful Orlando.'* Were ydu a fond parent, a tender hufband, and a noble Caftillan, I fliould not need to mention the unutterable hon'ors that took pofleffion of my bofom, when I perufcd this accurfed letter, by which I karned the apoftafy, dis- obedience, and degeneracy of my idolized Serafina, who had overthrown and deftroyed the whole plan of felicity t*hich I had erected, and blailed all the glories of my ftams ; and when the wretched meflenger, terrified by my menaces and agitation, confefled that Antonia her- felf was privy to the guilt of her daughter, whom fhe had folemnly betrothed to that vile German, in the fight of Heaven, and that by her connivance this Plebeian intend- ed, that very night, to bereave me of my child ; I was for fome moments ftupifieJ with grief and amazement, that Vol. I. T f gave 140' THE ADVENTURES OF gave way to an cxtafy of rage, which had well nigh ter". minated in defpair and diftraftion. I now tremble, and my head grows giddy with the re- jnembrance of that dreadful occalion : bcholJ how the drops trickle down my forehead ; this agony is a fierce and familiar vifitant ; I fliall banifli it anon. I fummontd my pride and my refcntment to my affiftance ; thefe are the cordials that fupport me againft all other refletSlions ; thofe were the auxiliaries that enabled me, in the day of trial, to perform that facrifice which my hctfiour demanded, in a ftrain (o loud, as to drown the cries of nature, love, and companion. Yes, they efpoufed that glory, which huma- nity would have betrayed, and my revenge was noble, though unnatural. My fchcme was foon laid, my refolution foon taken ; I privately confined the wretch who had been the indif- trious Have of this infamous confpiracy, that fhe might take no ftep to fruftrate, or interrupt the execution of my dciign. Then repairing to the houfe of an apothecary, who was devoted to my fervice, communicated tny inten- tion, which he durft not condemn, and could not reveal, without breakmg the oath of fecrecy I had impofed ; and he furnifhed me with two vials of poifon, for the difn-;al cataftrophe I had planned. Thus provided, I, on pretence of fuddcn builneis at Seville, carefuHy avoided the dear, the wretched pa r, whom I had devoted to dtath, that my heart might not relent, by means of thofe tender ider.s which the fight of them would have infallibly infpjred ; and when day-ligiit vanilhed, took my llation near that part of the houie through which the villain muft have entered on his helliih purpofe. There I fiood in a ftate of horrid expeftation, my foul ravaged with the diiFerent paillons that alTailed it, until the fatal moment arrived : when I perceived the traitor approach the window of a lower apartment, which led into that of Serafina,-and gently lifting the cafement, v/hich was purpofely left un- fecur^-d, infinuate half of his body into the houfe ; then ridhing upon him, in a tranfport of fury, I plunged my iword into his heart, crying, '* Viilala ! receive the reward of thy treachery and prefumption." The FERDINAND COUNT FATIiOM. 147 The Aeel was Co well aimed as to render a repetition of the ftroke unnectfl'ary ; he uttered one groan, and fell breathlefs at my feet. Exulting with this lirfl fuccefs of my revenge, I penetrated into the chamber, where the robber of my peace was exptdled by the unhappy Serafina and her mother, who feeing me enter with a moO: favage afpecl, and a fword reeking wi,th the vengeance I had ta- ken, feemed almoll petriiied with fear. " Behold," faid I, " the blood of that bafe plebeian, wlio made an' attempt upon the honour of my hou'fc : your confpiracy agair.it the unfortunate Don Diego de Z.los is now dif- covered ; that prefumptuous {lave, the favoured Orlando, is now no more." Scarce had I pronounced thefe word, when a loutl fcream was pronounced by both the unhappy V!Slims. *' If Orlando is flain, cried the infatuated Seraiirta, what have I to do with life ? O my dear lord ! my hufband, and my lover ! how are our promifed joys at once cut off! Here, ftrlke, my father ; compleat your barbarous fa- crifice, the fpirit of the murdered Orlando ftills houers for his wife." Thefe frantic exclamanons, in which flie was joined by Antonia, kept up the fury of my ref-^nt- ment, which by meeknefs and fubmiffion might have been weakened and rendered ineff^^ual. " Yes, hap- Jels wretches," I replied, " ye ihall enjoy your wifli : the honour of my name requires that both Ihall die ; yet I will not mangle the breaft of Antonia, on which I have fo often repofed ; I will not Ihed the blood of Zelos, nor disfigure the beauteous form ofSerafina, on which I have fo often gazed with wonder and unfpeakable delight : here is an elixir, to which I irufl: the confummation of my re- venge" So laying, I emptied the vials into feparate cups, and prefenting one in each hand, the raiferable, the fair of- fenders, inftantly received the deilined draughts, which they drank without hefitation : then praying to Heavea for the wretched Don Diego, funk upon the fame couch, and expired without a groan. O well-contrived bever- age ! O happy compofitlon, by which all the miferies of life are fo eafily cured ! Such was the fate of Antonia and Serafina ; thefe hands T 2 were I4i THE ADVENTURES OF were the inftruments that deprived them f life, theft eyes beheld th. m tnc richeft pri?e that death had ever vron. Powers fupreme ! does Don Diego Uve to make this reca^ ituiati. n ? I have done my duty ; but, ah I I am haunted by the furies of remorfe : I am tortured with the inceff-.nt ftings of remembrance and regret ; cyen now the images of my wife and daughter prefent themfelves to my imagination. AU the fcenes of bappinefs I have enjoyed as a lover, hufband, and parent ; 4II the endear- ing hopes I have cherifhed, now pafs in tev'tew before xne, embittering the circumfiances of my inexpreffiblo wo ; and I ccnlider myfelf as a folitary outcaft from all the comforts offociety. But enough of thefe unmanly complaints, the yearnings of nature are too importunate. Having compleatcd my vengeance, 1 retired into my elofet, andfurnifhing myfelf with feme ready money and jewels of coniiderable value, went into the ftable, faddled jny favourite fteed, which I inftantly moimted, and, be- fore the tumults of my breaft: fubfided, found myfelf at the town of St Lucar. There I learned from inquiry, that there was a Dutch bark in the harbour ready to fail ; upon which I addrefled myfelf to the mafter, who, for a fuitable gratification, was prevailed upon to weigh anchor that fame night ; fo that, embarking without delay, I fjon bid eternal adieu to my native country. It was not from reafon and refledlion that I took thefe meafures for my perfonal lafety ; but in cpnfequence of an involuntary in- ftinft, that fetms to operate in the animal machine, while the faculty of thinking is fufpended. To what a dreadful reckoning was I called, when rea- fon refumed her function ! you may believe me, my friend, vrhen I afTure you, that I fhould not have outlived thofq ti-agedies I ztcd, had I not been retrained from doing violence upon myfelf, by certain confi'lerations, which no tnan of honour ought to fet afide. I could not bear the thought of falling inglorioufly bythehandof anexecutioner, and intailing difgrace upon a family that knew no ilain i and I was deterred from putting an end to my own mi- fery, by the apprehenfions of pofthumous cenfure, which would have reprefented me as a defponding wretch, utter- ly dcftitutc of that patience, fortitude, and refignation, which FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. 149 jBrhich are the charatSteriftics of a true Caftilian. I was alfo influenced by religious motives, that fuggefted to me the neceffity of living to atone, br my lutfcrings and for- row, for the guilt I had incurred, in complying with a favage punclilio, which is, 1 fear, difpleafing in the light of Heaven. Thele were the reafons that oppofei my entrance into ^hat peaceful harbour which death prefented to my view j and they were loon reinforced by another principle, that fine corregidor to prevent the efcape of any native Spaniard, by fea, from any port within his diftrift ; and to ufe his utmof^ endeavours to appreiiend the perfun of Don Diego g b^ween the Spaniih and French nations, and the communicative dif- pofition for which the Perfians are renowned ; but I have found myfelf egregioufly deceived in my expectation : the officers of the Police in this city are fo inquifitive and vi- gilant, that the moft minute a<5\ion of a ftranger is fcru- -tinlzed with great f verity ; and althougli the inhabitants are very frank in difcourfing on different fuhjecls, they are at the lame time extrejnely cautious in avoiding all conver- iation that turns upon iVate x)ccurrences and maxims of <50vernment. In a word, the peculiarity of my appear- ance fubjecls me lb much to particular obfervation, that I, have hitherto thought proper to devour my griefs in 'ilience, and even to bear the want of almofl every con- venience, rather than hazard a premature difcovery, by ^offering my jewels to fale. In this emerg Tcy, I have been fo far fortunate as to be- come acquainted with you, whom I look upon as a man of honour and humanity. Indeed, I was, at firft fight, .^preprfleflcd in your favour : for, notwithfianding the mif- jtakes which men daily commit in judging from appearan- ces, there is fomething in the phyfiognomy of a ftranger, from which one cnnnot help forming an opinion of his character and dilpofition. For once, my penetration hatji zipt FERDIXA^JD COUNT FATHOM. 151' not failed mc *, your behaviour juftifics my decifion , yo have treated me with that fympathy and relpedl whictf none but the generous will pay to the unfortunate. I have trufted you accordingly : I have put my life, my honour in your power ; and I mult beg leave to depend upon your friendlhip, for obtaining that fatisfa^tion for which alone I feek to live. Your employment engages you in the gay world : you daily mingle with the focieties of men i the domcfiics of the Spanllh ambaffador will not fliun your acquaintance i you mayfrequent the coffee- houfes to which' they rcfort : and in the courfe of thefe occafions, unfuf- pe(ftcd, inform yourfelf of that myllerious charge Vtrhich lies heavy on the fame of the unfortunate Y)on Diego. I muft likewife implore your affiftance in converting ray jewels into money, that I may breathe independent of man until Heaven fhall permit me to fmifli this weary pilgrimage of life. C H A P. XXVI I. f A flagrant hijlance of FathorrCs virtue, in the manusr cf hii retreat to England. FATHOM, who had lent an attentive e.'.r to every" circumftance of this ciifaftrous llory, no fooner heard it concluded, than, with an afpeft of generous and cordial compafiion, not even unattended with tears, he condoled" the lamentable fate of Don Diego de Zelos ; deplored the untimely death of the gentle iYntonia and the fair Sera- iina, and undertook the interefts of the wretched Caftilian with luch v/armth of fympathizing zeal, as drew a flood from his eyes, while he wrung his benefactor's liand in a tranfport of gratitude. Thofe were iiter.iUy tears of joy, or at leaft: of fatisfaftion, on both fides ; as our hero wept with affeftion and attachment to the jewels that were to be committed to his care ; but, far from difcovering the true fource of his tendcrnefs, he afiedted to difTuaue the Spaniard from parting with the diamonds, which he coun- feUed him to referve for a more prefling occafion ; and, in the mean time, earneftly intrcated him to depend upon his i^t tHE ADVENTURES OF his friendftiip for prefent relief. This generous profief "ferved only to confirm Don Diego's refolution, whiclijie forthwith executed, by putting into ^he hands of Ferdi- nand jewels to the va'ue of a thoufV.nu crowns, and de- firing him to detain, for his own ufe, afty part of the fura they would raife. Our ad venturer thankei him for the good opinion he entertained of his integrity, an opinion fully manifeftcd in honouring him with fuch important confidence ; and ttflured him he would traniat his affairs with the utmoft diligence, caution and diljpHtch. The evening being by this time alraoft confumed, thefe new allies retired fepa- rately to reft ; though each palTcd the night without re- pofe, in very different refl'r^tions , the Caftilian being, as ufual, agitated with the uncealing pangs of his unalter- able roifcry, interfpcrfed with gleaming hopes of revenge : and Fathom being kept awake with revolving plans for turning his fcUow-lodgcr's credulity to his own advan- tage. From the nature of the Spaniard's fituation, h^ might have appropriated the jewtls to himfelf, and re- mained in Pans, without fear of a profecution, becaufe the injured party havl, by the above narrative, kft his life and liberty at difcretion. But he did not think himfelf rc- cure from the perfonal refentment of an enraged defperate Caftilian -, and therefore determined to withdraw himfelf privately into that country, w; ere he had all along pro- pofed to fix the ftandard of his fineffe, which fortune had now impowered him to exerciie according to his wifh. Bent upon this retreat, he went abroad in the m'orning, on pretence of a(5ling in the concerns of his friend Don D'cgo, and bavin.' hired a po(l chaife to be ready at the dawn of nt-xt day, returned to his lodgings, where he cajoled the Spaniard with a feigned report of his ncgoci- ation : then ftcurhig his rnoft valuable effects abcut his perfon, arofe with the cock, repaired to the place at which he had appointed to meet the poftilion with the carriage, and fet out for England without further delay ; leaving the urhjpi^-y Zelos to the horrors of ind gence, and the additional agony of this frcfh difappointment. Yet he .was rot the only perlbn affevhole afternoon in giving him pro* per inftruflions for the regulation of his conduft. Having fettled thefe preliminaries to his own fatisfac- tion, he and his baggage were embarked about fix o'clock in the month of September, and it wa.<; not without emo- tion that he found himlelf benighted upon the great deep, of which, before the preceding day, he had never enjoy-' cd even the moft diftant profpt't. However, he was not a man to be kfraid, where there was really no appearance of danger ; and the agreeable prefages of future fortune iupported his fpirits, amitlft the difagreeiible naufea which commonly attends landmen at fea, until he was fet alhore upon the bcich at Deal, whicli he entered in good health about feven o'clock in the morning. Like Csefar, however, he found fome diJFhculty in land- ing on account of the fwelling furf, that tumbled about with fuch violence, as had almofl: overfet the cutter that carried him on ihore; and in his cagervicfs to jump upon the ftrand, his foot flipped from the fide of the boat, lb that he was thrown forwards in an horizontal direction, and his hands were the firft parts of him that touched the Enghfh ground. Upon this occafion, hc> in imitatioi\ of iJcipio's behaviour on thecoafl: of Africa, hailed the omen, and grafping an handful of the fand, was heard to ex- claim in the ItaUan language, " Ah ha, Old England, I have thee faft.'' As he walked up to the inn, followed by Maurice load- ed with his portmanteau, he congratulated himfelf upon his happy voyage, and the peaceable poffeflion ofhisfpoil, and could not help fnufling up the Britifli air with marks of infinite relifli and fatisfaction. His firft care was to re- compence himfelf for the want of fleep he had undergone, and after he had fuflkiently recruited himfelf with fcveral hours of uninterrupted repofe, he fet out in a poft-chaife for Canterbury, where he took a place in the London ftage, which, he was told, would depart next morning, the coach being already full. On this very firft day of his arrival, he perceived between the Englifli, and the people among whom he had hitherto lived, fuch efiential difference in cuftoms, appearance, and way of living, as infpired him with high notions of that Britifh freedom, opulence, and contc- \ FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. 155 cenv^nicnce, on which he had often heard his mother ex- patiate. On the road, he feafted his eye light with the verdant hills covered with flocks of (beep, the fruitfui vales parcelled out into cultivated incloiures ; the very cattle fcemed to profit by the wealth of their mafters, being large, fturdy, and fleek, and every peafant breathed the inlblence of liberty and independence. In a word, he view- ed the wide-extended plains of Kent with a lover's eye, and his ambition becoming romantic, could not help fan- cying himlelf another conqueror of the ifle. He was not, however, long amufed by thefe ^'ain chi- meras, which foon vanifhed before ether refledlions ot* more importance and fohdity. His imagination, it rauit be owned, was at all times too chalte, to admit thofe over- weening hopes, which often miflead the mind of a pro- iedlor. He had ftudied mankind with incredible diligence, and knew perfeftiy well how far he could depend on the paffions and foibles of human nature. That he might now adt confiiient with his former fagacity, he relblved to pafs himidf upon his fellow travellers, for a French gen- tleman, equally a ftranger to the language and country of England, in order to glean from their difcourfe fuch in- tisUigence as might avail him in his future operations ; and his lacquey was tutored accordingly. CHAP. XXVIIf. SoiiA.account ofhisfellaw-iravellers. THOSE who had taken places for the coach, under- ftanding the iixth feat was engaged by a foreigner, determined to profit by his ignorance; and with that po- litenefs which is peculiar to this happy ifiand, fixed them- felves in the vehicle, in fuch a manner, before he had the leaft intimation of their defign, that he found it bare- ly practicable to infinuate himfeif fidelong between a cor- pulent quaker, and a fat Wapping landlady, in which at- titude he iluck fail, like a thin quarto between two vo- luminous dictionaries on a bookftller's ihelf ; and as if the pa^n and inconvenience of fuch compreffion, was not fuf- U 2 ' ficient 156 THE ADVENTURES OF ficient matter of chagrin, the greateft part of the com- pany entertained themfelves with laughing at his ludicrous ilatioD. The jolly dame at his left hand obferved with a loud exclamation of mirth, that Monfieur would be foon better acquainted with a buttock of Engliih beef; and faid, by that time they (hould arrive at their dining place, he might be fpitted without larding. *' Yes, verily," repli'd Obadiah, who was a wag in his way, " but the fwine's fat will be all on one fide." " So much the better for you,'' cried mine hoftefs, " for that fide is all your own." The quaker was not fo much difconcerted by the quicknefs of this repartee, but that he anfwered with great delibera- tion, " I thank thee for thy love, but will not profit by tSy lofs ; efpecially as I like not the favour of thefe out- Jandifh fowls ; they are profane birds of pafTage, relifhed Only by the children of vanity, like thee." The plump gentlewoman took umbrage at this lafl ex- preffion, which fhe'confidered as a double reproach, and repeated the words " Children of vanity !" with an em- phafis of rerentment. " I believe if the truth were known, f ' (lie, there's more vanity than midriiF, in that great belly of your's, for all your pretending to humility and re- li on. Sirrah 1 my corporation is made up of good, whole- ibme Englifh fat ; but you are puffed up with the wind of Vaai!:y and delufion; and when it begins to gripe your entrails, you pretend to have a motion, and then get up a :>'. preach nonfenfe : yet you'll take it upon you to call *r ur betters Children ; marry come up, Mr Goofecap, I jaave got children that are as good men as you or any hy- pocritical trembler in England." A perfon who fat oppofite to the quaker hearing this remonftrance, which feemed pregnant with contention, interpofed in the converfation with a ccnfcious leer, and bagged there might be no rupture between the fpirit and t le flefh. By this remonftrance, he relieved Obadiah from the fatireofthis female orator, and brought the whole vengeance of her elocution upon his own head. " Fle/h ! cried Ihe, with all the ferocity of an enraged Thaleflris, none of your names, Mr Yellow chaps. What ! I warrant you have an antipathy to flefh, becaufe yon vQurfe/f FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. i^ ,ypurfclf are nothing but Ikin and bone. I fuppofe you arc 4omc poor ftarv'd journeyman taylor come from France, where you have been learning to cabbage, and have not leen a good meal of victuals tbefe feven years ; you have teen living upon rye-bread aiid foup-maigre, and now you come over like a walking atomy, with a rat's tail at your wig, and a tinfy jackt-t j and fo forfooth, you fet up for a gentleman, and pretend to find fault with a furloin of roaft beef. 'llie gentleman heard this addrefs with admirable pa- tience, and when rhe had rung out her alarm, very cooly replied, " Any thing but your ftinking fifti, Madam, tiince when, I pray, have you travelled in itage-coaches, and left otf your old profeffion of crying oyfters in winter, and rotten mackarel in June i You was then known by the name of Kate Brawn, and in good repute among the ale-houfes in Thames ftreet, till that unlucky amour with the mafter of a corn vefiel, in which he was unfortunate- ly deteOed by his own fpoufe ; but you feem to have rifen by that fall, and I wiih you joy of your prefent plights tbiDugh confidcring your education of Bear key, you can give but a forry account of yourfelf." The amazon, though neither exhaufted nor difmayed, .was really confounded at the temper and aflurance of this antagonift, who had gathered all thefe anecdotes from the fertility of his own invention ; after a Ihort paufe, however, ihe poured forth a torrent of obloquy fulficient to overwhehn any perlon v/ho had not been ufed to take up arms againft luch feas of trouble; and a difpute enfued, whicli would have not only difgraced the bell orators oa the Thames, but even have made a figure in the celebra- tion of the Eleufinian myfleries, during which the Athe- nian matrons rallied one another from different waggonsj with that freedom of altercation fo happily preferved in this our age and country. Such a redundancy of epithets and variety of metaphors, tropes, and figures, were uttered between thefe well-mat- ched opponents, that an epic bard would have found his account in listening to the conteil, which, in all probabi- lity, wouid not, have been confined to words; had it not "ptca interrupted for the fake of a young woman of an agreeable 1^^ THE ADVENTURES OF agreeable countenance and modeft carriage ; who being fhocked at feme of their flowers of fpeech, and terrified by the menacing looks and geilures of the fiery-featured dame, began to fcream aloud, and beg leave to quit the coach. Her perturbation put an end to the high debate. The fixth palTcnger, who had not opened his mouth, en- xleavourcd to comfort her with aiTurances of protection j the quaker propofcd a ceflation of arms j the male difpu- tant acquiefced in the propofal, alluring the company he Jiad entered the lifts for their entertainment only, without Jiarbouring the leail grudge or ill will to the fat gentlewo- man whom he protefted he had never feen before that day, and who, for aught he knew, was a perfon of credit and reputation. He then held forth his hand in tolcen of a- niity, and alked pardon of the offended party, who was appeafed by his fubmiffion ; and, in telhmony of her be- nevolence, prefcnted to the other female, whom fhe had difcompoled, an Hungary-water bottle filled with cherry brandy, recommending it as a much more powerful re- medy, than the Sal volatile, which the other held to her nofe. Peace being thus re-eftabliflied, in a treaty, compre^ hending Obauiah and all prefent, it will not be improper to give tne reader forne further information touching the feveral chai'adters aflembled in this vehicle. The quaker was a London merchant, wlu3 had been at Deal, fuperin- tending tiie repairs of a fliip, w^hich had differed by a florni in the Downs. The Wapping landlady was on her return from the fame place, where Ihe had attended the payment of a man of war, with fimdry powers of attor- jicy trranted by the failors, who had lived upon credit at lier hoiilc. Her competitor in fame was a dealer in wine, a fmucgler of French lace, and a petty gamefter juft ar- rived from Paris, in the company of an Englilh barber who fat on his right hand, and the young woman was d jughter of a country -curate, in her way to London, where ihe was bound apprentice to a milliner. Hitherto Fathom had fat in filent aftonilhment at the manners of his felloif^-travellers, which fir exceeded the motions he had pre-conceived of Englifh plainnefs and rufticity : he found himfelf a n^onument of that dirregar4 FERX)INAND COUNT FATHOM. tfg and contempt, which a ftranger never fails to meet with' from the inhabitants of this ifland ; and faw, with furprife, an agreeable young creature fit as folitary and unheeded as himfelf. He was, indeed, allured by the rofes of her complexion, and the innocence of her nfpeit, and began to repent of having pretended ignorance ot the language by which he w^s reftrained from exercifing hia eloquence upon her heart ; he refolved, however, to ingratiate him- felf, ifpoffible, by the courtefy and politeneis of dumb iliew, and for that purpole put his eyes in motion* witk- out further delay. CHAP. XXIX. Another providtntinl deliverancey from the effeHs oftheftnug- gler's ingenious conje^ure^ DURING thefe deliberations, the wine-merchant, with a view to make a parade of his fuperior parts and breeding, as well as to pave the \vay for a match at back- gammon, made a tender of his fnuff box to our adventu- rer, and aflced, in bad French, how he travelled from Pa- ris ? This queftion produced a feries of interrogations,, concerning the place of Ferdinand's abode in that city, and his bufinefs in England ; fo that he was fain to prac- tice the fcience of defence, and anfwered with fuch am- biguity, as aroufed the fufpicion of the fmuggler, who began to believe our hero had fome very cogent reafon for evading his curiofity. He immediately fet his reflec- tion at work, and after various conjedlures, fixed upon Fa- thom's being the young pretender. Big with this fup- polition, he eyed him with the moll earneft attention, comparing his features with-thofe of the chevalier's por- trait, which he had feen in France, and though the faces were as unlike as any two human faces could be, found the refemblance fo liriking as to difpel all his doubts, and perfuadc him to introduce the ftranger to fome Juf- tice on the road : a ftep by which he would not only manif;.^ft his zeal for the Proteftant fucceffion, but alfo ac- quire lio ^HE ABVENTURES OF quire the fplendid reward propofed by Parliment to xa?j^ perfon who fliould apprehend that famous adventurer. Thefe ideas intoxicated the brain of this man to fuch' a pitch of enthufiafm, that he actually believed himfelf in pofleffion of the thirty thoufand pounds, and amizfed his fancy with a variety of magnificent projels to be execut- ed by means of that acquiiition ; until his reverie was io- terrupted by the halting of the coach at the inn where the paflengers ufed to eat their breakfafts. Waked as he was from the dream of happinefs, it had made fuch im- preffion upon his mind, that feeing Fatliom rife up with an intention to alight, he took it for granted his delign was to efcape, and feizing him by the collar, called aloud for aflidance, in the king's naa.c. Our hero, whofe fagacity and prefencc of mind very often fupplied the place of courage, inrtead of being ter- rified at this alTauIt, which might have difturbedthe tran- quillity of an ordinary villa'n, was fo perfectly mafter of every circuinftance of his own fituation, as to know at once, that the aggreflbr could not poiEbly have the leaft caufc of complaint againft him ; and therefore, imputing this violence either to madnefs or miflake, very deliber- ately fufFered himfelf to be made prifoner by the people of the houfc, who ran to the coach-door, in obedience to the fummons of the wine-merchant. The reft of the company were flruck dumb with furprile and confterna- tion at this fudden adventure, and the quaker dreading fome fell refiftancc on the fide of the outlandifh-man, unpinned the other coach door in the twinkling of an eye, and trundled himfelf into the mud for fafety. The others feeing the temper and refignation of the prifoner, foon recovered their recollection, and began to inquire into the caufe of his arreft : upon wloich the captor, whofe teeth chattered with terror and impatience, gave them to underftand that he was a ftate criminal, and demanded their help in -conveying him to juftice. Luckily for both parties, there happened to be at the inn a company of fquires juft returned frorii the death of a leafh of hares, which they had ordered to be dreffed fot' dinner, and among thefe gentlemen was one of the .quo- rum, to whom the accufer had immediate recourfe, 2 marchini' t-^RDINAND COUNT FATHOM. i<5r tfiarching brfose the captive, who walked very peaceably between the landlord and one of his waiters, and followed by a crowd of fpedtators, fome of whom had fecured the faithful Maurice, who, in his behaviour, clolely imitated the deliberation of his mafter. In this order did the pro- ceffion advance to the ap-.n'tment, in which the magiltrittei ^vith his fellows of the chace, fat fmoaking his morning pipe over a tankard of ftrong ale ; and the fmuggler be- ing diredted to the right pcrfun, " May i: pleale your worihip, faid he, I have brought this f e^jner before you, on a violent fufpicion of hjs being a proclaimed out- law, and I deilre, before thefe witneffes, that my title may be made good to the reward that Ihall become due upon, his conviction/' " Friend, replied the juftice, 1 know nothing of you or your titles, but this I know, if you have any informa- tion to give in, you muft come to my houfe when I am at liome, and proceed in a lawful way, that is, d'ye mind me, if you fwear as how this here perfon is an outlaw, then if fo be as he has nothing to fay to the contrary, my clerk (hall make out a mittimus; and fo to jail with him till next llze." *' But, Sir,'' anfwered the impeacher, " this is a cafe that admits of no delay, the perfon I have apprehended is a prifoner of confequence to the ftate.** *' Hov/ ! fellow," cried the magiftrate, interrupting him^ *' is there any perfon of more confequence than one of his majefty's juftices of the peace, -^who is bcfides a conlidera- ble member of the landed intereft ? d'ye know, lirrah, who you are talking to ? if you don't go about your buli- nefs I believe I ihall lay you by the heels." , The fmuggler fearing his prize would efcape through the ignorance, pride, and obftinacy of this country juftice, approached his worfliip, and in a whifper, which was over- heard by all the company,, aflured him, he had indubita- ble reafon to believe the foreigner was ho other than the pretender's eldeft fon. At mention of this formidable name, every individu- al of the audience ftarted with figns of terror and amaze- ment. The juflice dropped his pipe, recoiled upon his chair, and looking mod ridiculoufly aghaft,- exclaimed, '* Seize VoL.L X t Kim jtfr tRE ADVENrrURES OF' him in the name of God, and his majefty king George f has he got no fccret arms about him ?" Fathom being thus informed of the fufpicion under which he flood, could not help fmiling at the. eagerhefs with which the fpeifbtors flew upon him ; aud fuftered himfelf to be fearched with great compofure, well know- jug they would iind no moveables about his perfon, but fufch as, upon examination, would turn to his account ; he, therefore, very calmly prefented to the magiftrate his ],nirfe, and a fmail box that contained his jewels, and, in the French language, defired they might be preferred from the hands of the mob. Tliis requeft was interpreted' by the accuftr, who at the fame time laid claim- to the booty ; the juftice took charge of the depofit, and one of his neighbours having undertaken the office of clerk, he proceeded to the examination of the culprit, whofe papers t^ere by this time laid on the table before him. " Stran- ger, faid he, you fland charged with being fon of the pre- tender to thefe realms : what have you to fay in your own defence ?" Our hero afTured him in the French language that He \Vas falfely impeached, and demanded juftice on the accufer, who, without the leaft reafon, had made fuch u malicious attack upon the life and honour of an inno- cent gentleman. The fmugglcr, infEead of aJTfing the part of a faithful Interpreter, told his Worfhip that the prifoncr's anlVer yrzs no more th.in a limple denial, \Vhich every felon would make who had nothing elfe to plead in his own behalf ; and that this alone was a ftrong prefiimption of I\is gui't , becaufe, if he was net really the perfon they; fufpecled him to be, the thing would fpeak for itfelf ; for,, if he was not the yourtg Pretender, who then was he ?** This argument had great weight with the juftice, who, af- fuming a very important afpeft, obferved, * Very true, friend, if you are not the Pretender, in the name of God^ who are you ? one may fee with half an eye that he is V.0 better thart a promifcuous fellow." Ferdinand now began to repent of having pretended ig- norance of the Englifli language, as he found himfelf at the mercy of a rafcal, who put a falfe glofs upon all his words ; :toid- addrefTed himfelf to the audience fucccffively in Frienth) FERDINAND COUNT FATHcgun to indulge in his behalf, fhe rejefted his advances with all the marks of anger and difdain ; and he found it; necefTary to appeafe the ftorm he had raifed, by the mod refpeftful and fuhmiffive demeanour ; refolving to change his operations, and carry on his attacks, fo as to make her yield at difcretion, without alarming her religion or pride. Accordingly, when the bill was called after dinner, he took particular notice of h.er behaviour, and perceiving iicr pull out a large leathern purfe that contained her money, reconnoitred the pocket in which it was depofited, and while they fat clofe to each other in the carriage, con- veyed it with admirable dexterity into an hole in the culhion. Whether the corpulent couple, who ht oppofite to thefe lovers, had entered into an amorous engagement ;.t the inn, or were fcverally induced by other motives,- is uncertain ; but fure it is, both left the coach on that part of the road which lies neareft to Oravefend, and bad adieu to the other pair, on pretence of having urgent bu- finefs at that place. Ferdinand, not a little pleafed at their departure, re- newed his mofk pathetic expreifions of love, and fling fc- veral French fongs on that tender fubjeft, which fecmed to thrill to the foul of his beauteous Helen. While the driver halted at Dartford to water his horfes, fhe was fmit with the appearance of fome cheefecakes, which were pre- fented by the landlady of the houie, and liaving bargain- ed for two or three, put her hand in her pocket, in or- der to pay fcr her purchafej but what was her aflonifh- aient, when, after having rummaged her equipage, fhe un- a derftood FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. 169 derftood her whole fortune was loft ! Tliis milhap waa by a loud Ihriek announeetl to our hero, who affedled infl- nite amazemsnt and concern j and no (boner learned the caule of her afilition, than he prefentcd her with hia own purfe, from which he, in einphatic dumb fhew, beg- ged flie would indemnify herfelf for the damage (he had fuftained. Although this kind proffer was fome allevia- tion of her misfortune, fhe did not fail to pour forth a snoft piteous lamentation, importing that Ihe had not on- ly loft all her money, amounting to five pounds, but aHb her letter of recommendation, upon which ihe had altoge- ther relied for prefent employment. The vehicle was minutely fearched from top to bottom, by herfelf and our adventurer, afiifted by Maurice and the coachman, who finding their inquiry ineffeclual, did not fcruple to declare his fufpicion of the two fat turtles who had deferted the coach in fuch an abrupt manner. la a word, he rendered this conjecture fo plaufiWe, by wreft- ing the circumftances of their behaviour and retreat, that poor Elenor implicitely believed they wre the thieves by whom fhe had fuffered ; and was prevailed upon to accept the proffered afliftanee of the generous count, who feeing her very much difwdered by this mifchance, infifted up- nher drinking a large glafs of Canary to quiet the perturba- tion of her fpirits. This is a feafon which, of all others, is moft propitious to the attempts of an ^rtful lover j and iufiifies the metaphorical maxim of fifhing in troubled waters. There is an afiinity and fhort tranfition betwixt all the violent paflions that agitate the human mind : thejr arc all falfe pcrfpeftives, which, though they magnify, yt perplex and render indiftin would not pcjfpe- VoL. I. t Y tratc 17* THE ADVENTURES OF f trate his vitious purpofe, though flavoured by the deli- rium his villany had entailed upon this unfortunate young maiden ; becaufe his appetite demanded a more perfeft fa- crifice than that which (he could yield in her prefent de-f plorable fltuation, when her will muft have been altoge- ther unconcerned in his fuccefs. Determined, therefore, to miike a conqueft of her virtue, before he would take poflt flion of her perfon, he mimicked that compaffion and benevolence which his heart had never felt, and when the coach arrived at London, not only difciiarged what flie owed for hfr place, but likewife procured for her an apartment in the houfe to which he himfelf had been directed for lodgings, and even hired a nurfe to at- tend her d^iring a fevere fever, which was the confe- quence of her difappointment and defpondence. Indeed Ihe was fupplied with all neceflaries by the generolity of this noble count, who, for the intereft of his paflion, and the honour of his name, was refolved to extend his cha- rity to the laft farthing of her own money, \^hich he had been wife enough to fecure for this purpofe. Her youth foon got the better of her diftemper, and when (he underftood her obligations to the count, who did not fail to attend her in perfon with great tender- Tjefs, her heart, which had been before prepoflefTed in his favour, now glowed with all the warmth of gra- titude, eftcem and affedVion, She knew herfelf in a flrange place, deftitute of all refource but in his generoii- ty: fhe loved his perfon, (he was dazzled by his rank ; and he knew fo well how to improve the opportunities and advantages he derived from her unhappy fltuation, that he gradually proceeded in fapping from one degree of intimacy to another, until all the bulwarks of her chai^ tity were undermined, and (he fubmitted to his defire j not with the reluctance of a vanquKhed people, but with all the tranfports of a joyful city, that opens its gates to receive a darling prince, returned from conqueft : for, by this time, he had artfully concentred and kmdled up all the inflammable ingredients of her conflitution; and (he, now looked back upon the virtuous principles of her edu- cation, as upon a difagreeable and tedious dream, from which fhe had wake4 to the fruition of never-fading joy. CHAP. l^ERDINAND COUl^T FATHOI^. 17 % G H A P. XXXI; jyi?, by accident) encounters his oldfriend^ with ivhom he nalas a confer etice^ and renenvs a treaty. OUR Hero having thus provided himfclf with a pro- per fubjedl for his hours of dalliance, thought it was now high time to ftudy the ground which he had pitched upon for the fcene of his exploits^ and with that view made feveral excurfions to different parts of the town, where there was ought of entertainment or in- ftruftion to be found : yet he always, on thefe occaiionsi appeared in an obfcure ordinary drefs, in order to avoid, lingiilarity, and never went twice to the fame coffee-howfe, that his perfon might not be afterwards known, in cafe he (hould Ihine forth to the public in a iuperior fphere. On his return from one of thefe expeditions, while he was paffing tlirough Ludgate, his eyes were fuddenly en- countered, by the apparition of his old frichd the Tyro- leze, who perceiving himfelf fairly caught in the toil, made a virtue of neceffity, and running up to Our adventurer with an afpet of eagertiefs and joy, clafped him in his arms, as fome dear friend, whom he had cafually found after a moft tedious and difagreeable feparation. Fathom, whofe genius never failed him in fuch emer- gencies, far from receiving thefe advances with the threats and reproaches which the other had deferved at his hands^ returned the falute with equal warmth, and was really overjoyed at meeting with a perfon, who might, one way or other, make amends for the perfidy of his former con- duct. The Tyroleze, whofe name was Ratchkali| plea- fed with his reception, propofed they fhould adjourn to the next tavern, in which they had no fooner taken poffef- fion of an apartment, than he addrefled himfelf to his old companion in thefe words : '* Mr Fathom, by your frank and obliging manner of treating a man who hath done you wrong, I am more and more confirmed in my opinion of your fagacity, which I have often confidered with admiration : I will not there- fore attempt to make an apology for my condu^ at our Y 2 laft J^^ THE ADVENTURES OF laft parting ; but only aflure you, that this meeting may turn out to our mutual advantage, if vit now re-enter in- to an unreferved union, the ties of which we will foon find it our intereft and inclination to jH-eferve. For my own part, as my judgment is ripened by experience, fo are my fentiments changed fmce our laft aflbciation. I have feen many a rich harveft loft, for want of a felloW- labourer in the vineyard ; and I have more than once fallen a facrifice to a combination, which I could have refifted with the help of one able auxiliary. Indeed I might prove what I alledge by mathematical demonftra- tion \ and I believe no body will pretend to deny, that rwo heads are better than one, in all cafes that require difcernment and deliberation/* Ferdinand could not help owning the fanity of his ob- i'ervations, and fcwthwith acquiefced in his propofal of the new alliance ; defiring to know the character in which he afted on the Knglilh Itage, and the fcheme he would offer for their mutual emolument : at the fame time he refol- ved within himfelf, to keep fuch a ilri^^t eye over his future actions, as would fruftrate any dcfign he might hereafter harbour, of repeating the prank he had fo fuc- cefsfuUy played upon him in their journey from the banks of the Rhine. ** Having quitted you at Bar le due," refumed the Ty- roleze, " I travelled without ceafing, until I arrived at Franckfort upon the Maine, where I aflumed the charac- ter of a French chevalier, and (truck fome mafterly ftrokes, which you yourfelf would not have deemed unworthy of your invention j and my fuccefs was the more agreeable^ as my operations were chiefly carried on againft the ene* mies of our religion : but my profperity was not of long duration. Seeing they could not foil me at my own wea- pons, they formed a damned conl'piracy, by which I not only loft all the fruits of my induftry, but likewife ran the moft imminent hazard of my life. I had ordered fbme of thofe jewels which I had borrowed of my good friend Fa- thom, to be new fet in a fafhionable tafte, and foon after had an opportunity to fell one of thefe at a great advan- tage, to one of the fraternity, who offered an extraordi- nary price for the ftone, on purpolc to effect my ruin. hx FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. 1 73 In lefs than four and twenty hours after this bargain, I was arrefted by the officers of juftice, upon the oath of the purchafer, who undertook to prove me guilty of a fraud, in felling a Saxon pebble for a real diamond -, and this accufation was aftually true ; for the change had been artfully put upon me, by the jeweller, who was himfelf en- gaged in the confpiracy. Had my confcience been clear of any other impeach- ment, perhaps, I Ihould have reftcd my caufe upon the equity and protedlion of the law ; but I forefaw that the trial would introduce an inquiry, to which I was not at all ambitious of fubmitting, and therefore was fain to cona- promife the affair, at the price of almoft my whole for- tune. Yet this acommodation was not made fo fecretly, but that my character was blafted, and my credit over- thrown; fo that 1 was fain to relinquifh my occaCooal equipage, and hire myfelf as journeyman to a lapidary, an employment which I had exercifed in my youth. In this obfcure ftation, I laboured with great alhduity, until I made myfelf perfe^l: in the knowledge of ftones, as well as in the different methods of fetting them off to the befl advantage j and having, by dint of induftry and addrefs, got poffeffion of a fmall parcel, fet out for this kingdom, in which I happily arrived about four months ago | and furely England is the Paradife of artifls.of our pro- fcfllon. One would imagine, that nature had created the inha- bitants, for the fupport and enjoyment of adventurers like you and me. Not that thefe inlanders open the arms of hofpitality to all foreigners without diflindion : on the cojiti-ary, they inherit from tlielr fathers an unreafonable prejudice againfl all nations under the lun j and when an Englilliman happens to quarrel with a iVranger, the firft term of repraach he ufes, is the name of his antagoniil's country, chara^erized by fome opprobrious epithet ; fuch as a chattering Frenchman, an Italian ape, a German hog, and a beaftly Dutchman ; nay, their national prepoflelfion b maintained even againffc thofe people with whom they are united, under the fame laws and government ; for nothing is more common than to hear tiiem exclaim a- gainft their fellow- fubjeits, in the cxprefllons of a beggar- if 4 THE ADVENTURES OF ly Scot, and an impudent Irifh bog-trotter. Yet this veif prejudice will never fail to turn to the account of every ftranger poffeffed of ordinary talents ; for he will always find opportunities of converfing with them in CofFee- houfes, and places of public refor^t, in fpite of their pro- fefled referve, which, by the bye, is fo extraordinary, that I know fome people who have Uved twenty years in the fame houfe, without exchanging one word with their next door neighbours ; yet provided he can talk fenlibly and preferve the deportment of a fober gentleman, in thofe occafional converfations, his behaviour will be the more remarkably pleating, as it will agreeably difappoint the ex- pelation of the perfon who had entertained notions to his prejudice. When a foreigner has onie croffed this' bar, which perpetually occurs, he fails without further difficulty into the harbour of an Englilhman''s good will y for the pique is neither perfonal nor rancorous, but rather contemptuous and national j fo that while he defpifes a people in the lump, an individual of that very commu- nity may be one of his chief favourites. The Englifti are in general upright and honeft, there- fore unfufpefting and credulous : they are too much en- groffed with their own buiinefs, to pry into the conduct of their neighbours, and too indifferent, in point ofdifpo- fition, to intereft themfelves in what they conceive to be foreign to their own concerns. They are wealthy and- mercantile, of confequence liberal and adventurous, and fo well difpofed to take a man's own word for his import- ance, that they fuffer themfelves to be preyed upon by fuch a bungling fet of impoftors as would ftarve for lack of addrefs, in any other country under the fun. This being a true iketch of the Britiih charafter, fo far as I have been able to obferve and learn, you will eafily conv prehend the profits that may be extraftcd from it, by vir- tue of thofe arts by which you fo eminently excel ; the great, the unbsundfd profpe^ lies before 'me! Indeed, I look upon this opulent kingdom as a wide and fertile com- mon, on which we adventurers may range for prey, with- out let or moleftation ; for fo jealous are the natives of their liberty, that they will not bear the reftraint of ne- ceffary PtLoU, aud an able artift may enrich himfelf with their TERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. 175 their fpoils, without running any rifquc of attrafting the notice of the magiftrate, or incurring the leaft penalty of the law. In a word, this metropolis is a vaft mafquerade, in which a man of ftratagcm may wear a thoufand different difguifes, without danger of detection. There is a varie- ty of ftiapes, in which we knights of induftry, make our appearance in London. One glides into a nobleman's houfe in the capacity of a valet de chambre, and in a few months leads the whole family by the nofe. Another ex- hibits himfelf to the public, as an empiric or operator for the teeth ; and by dint of affurance and affidavits, bear- ing teltimony to wonderful cures that never were perform- ed, whirls himfelf into his chariot, and lays the town under contribution : a third profefles the compofition of mufick s we'll as the performance, and by means of a few Capri' -ciofot on tha violin, piroperly introduced, wriggles himfelr into the management of private and public concerts , and a fourth breaks forth at once in all the fplendor of a gay equipage under the title and denomination of a foreign count. Not to mention thofe inferior projectors, who affume the chara/dlers of dancers, fencing-mafters, and French ulhers, or by renouncing their religion, feek to obtain a provifipn for life. Either of thefe parts will turn to the account of an able ai:or ; and as you are equally qualified for all, you may choofe that which is mod fuitable to your own inclina- tion ; though, in my opinion, you was defjgned by nature, to fhine in the great world, which, after all, is the moft ample field for men of genius ; becaufe the game is deeper, and people of fafhion being, for the moft part, piore ignorant, indolent, vain, and capricious, than their inferiors, are of confequcnce more eafily deceived ; beiides their morals fit generally fo loofc about them that when fi gentleman of our fraternity is difcovered in the exercife of his profeffion, their contempt of Ijis Ikill is the only difgrace he incurs." Our hero was fo well pleafed with this picture, that he longed to perufe the original, and before thefe two friends parted, they fettled all the operations of the campaign, ^atchkfih, that fame evening, hired magnificent lodgings for 176 THE ADVENTURES OF for Count Fathom, in the court end ot the town, and fiir- Tiilhed his wardrobe and liveries from the fpoils of Mon- mouth-ftreet ; he Ukewife enlifled another footman and valet de chambre into his fervice, and fent to the apart- ments divers large trunks, fuppofed to be filled with the baggage of this foreign nobleman, though in reality, they contained little elfe than common lumber. Next day, our adventurer took pofleffion of his new habitation, after having left to his friend and aflbciate the talk of difmiffing the unfortunate Elenor, who was fo ihocked at the unexpected meflagc, that flie fainted a- way ; and when fhe recovered her fenfes fo well as to refleCl upon her forlorn condition, fhe was feized with the mo ft violent tranfports of grief and difmay, by which her brain was dlfordered to fuch a degree, that ihe grew furious and diftra^ted, and was, by the advice an^ aflifl* ance of the Tyroleze, conveyed into the hofpi^al of i3eth- lem ; where we (hall leave her for tke; prefent, happily bereft of her reafon. CHAP. XXXII. He appears in ihc^ ^eckt luorld nuitb wiiverfai applaufi and admiraiioa. MI'Iakwhilk, Fathom and hk engme were bufied in complcating his equipage, fo that in a few days I proturtd a very g'.iy chariot, aiiomed with paint- ing, gilding, and a co'.>t of arms, according to his own fancy and direction : the firft ufe he made of this vehicle was that of viliting the young nobleman from whom he had received fuch important civilities on the road, in confe- quence of an invitation at parting, by which he learn- ed his title and the place of his abode in London. His lordfhip vms not only plea fed, but proud to fee fuch a ftranger at his gate, and entertained him with exccfs of romplaifance and hofpitality; infomuch, that by his means our hero foon became acquainted with the whole circle of polite company, by whom he was careffed for his infinu- ating manners and agreeaWe converfation. He had 3 thought i^ERDINAND COUNT FATHO^i. t'jj khought proper to tell the nobleman at their firft inter- View in town, that his reafons for concealing his know- ledge of the Englifh tongue were now removed, and that be would no longer deny himfelf the pleafure of fpeaking a language which had been always muiic to his ear : he had alfp thanked his lordfhip for his generous interpofi- tion at the iun, which was an inftance of that gcnerofity and true pplitcneis, which arc engrcfled by the Englifh people, who leave nought to other nations but the meet" lliadow of thefe virtues. A. teflimony like this from the itiouth of fuch a noble ftranger, won the heart of the peer, who profelFed a friendflilp for him on the fpot, and undertook to fee juf- tice done to his laqiiey, who in a ihort time was gratilied with a fhare of the feiziire which had been made upoxi his information, amounting to fifty or fixty poundsi Ferdinand put not forth the whole ftrength of his ac- tomplilhments at once, but contrived to fpring a new mine of qualification every day, to the fiirprize and admi- ration of all his acquaintance; He was gifted with a fort of elocution, much mojre fpecioiis than Iblid, and fpoke \dn every fubjej^ that occurred in conVerfationi with that familiarity and eafe, which, one would think, could only be acquired by long ftudy and application. This plaufi- bility and confidence are faculties re illy inherited from nature, and effectually ferve the poli'eflbr, in lieu of that karningj which is tiot to be obtained without infinite toil and perfeverance ' the molt fuperficial tinfture of the arts and fciences ih fuch a juggler, is fufficient to dazzle the ijnderftanding of half mankind ; andi if managed with cir- cumipection, will enable him even to fpend his life among the literati, without once forfwiiing the sharafter of a coor nolfleur. Our hero was perfectly liiafter of thi^ legerdemainj \irhich he carried to fuch a pitch of alTurance, as to declare, in the midll: of a mathematical alTembly, that.he intended |o gratify the public with a full confutation of Sir Ifaac Newton's philofophvj to the nature of which he was at much a ftranger as thfe moft favage Hottentot; in Africa. His pretenfions to profound and unxverfai knowledge, 1e ? rujjported not Only by thi Jsand of prefuoiption, but. VoLi r. t * alio ijS' THE ADVENTURES d^ alfo by the felicity with which he fpoke (o many diffbrcrrf- languages, and the {hrewd remarks he had made in the courfe of his travels and oblervation. Among politicians, he fettled the balance of power up^' on a certain footing, by dint of ingenious fchemes, which- lie had contrived tor the welfare of Europe. With offi- cers, he reformed the art of war, with improvements^ which had occurred to his reftedtion, while he was engag-' ed in a military life. He fometimes held forth upon painting, like a member oT the lyUeitanti club : the the- crry of mulick was a theme upon which he feemed to ex- patiate with particular pleafure : in the provinces of love and gallantry, he Avas a perfect Oroondates : he pofleiTed a moll agreeable manner of telling entertaining ftories, of "srhich he had a large colledlion : he fung with great me- lody and tafte, and played upon the violin with furprifing- execution. To thefe qu^aUfications let us add his affabi- lity and pliant dilpofition, and then the reader will not" wonder that he was looked upon as tlie pattern of human perfeftion, and his acquaintance courted accordingly. While he thus captivated the favour and affeftion of rlie Engliili nobility, he did not neglect to take other mea- fiires in behalf of the partnerfhip to wliich he had fub- Icribcd. The adventure ^th tlie two fquires at Paris had' ^'eakened his appetite for play, which was not at all re- ftorcd by the obfervations he had made in London,' where the art of gaming is reduced into a regular fyftem,' and its profeffors fo laudably devoted to the difcharge of their functions, as to obferve the mofl: temperate regi-' ilien, left their invention fliould be impaired by the fa- rjgu'e 4>f watching cr cxercife, and their ideas diftnrbed by the fumes of indigeftion. No Indian Brachman could" live mwe abftemious than two of the pack, who hunted in couple, and kennelled in the upper apartments of the' hotel in vtfhich our adver^turer lived ; they abftained from inimal food with the abhorrence of Pythagoreans, their drink was the pure fimple demerit, they were vomited" once a week, took phytic, or a glyfter, every third day, fpent the forenoon in algebraical calculations, and flept from four o'clock till midnight, that they might then^ . tike FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. 1.79 take the field with that cool ferenity which is the effedjt of refrelhment and repofe. Thefe were terms upon which our hero would not rifqu$ his fortune ; he was too much aJdiclt^d to pleafure to forego every other enjoyment but that of amalling ; and did not fo much depend upon his dexterity in play, as upon his talent of infinuation, which by this time had fucceeded fo far beyond his expectation, that he began t(^ indulge the hope of enflaving the heart of fome rich heireis, whole fortune would at once ra'fe him above all dependence. Indeed no man ever fet out with a fairer profptiSl on fuch an expedition ; for he had found mean to render himfelf fo agreeable to the fair fex, that, like the boxes of the play-houfe, during the rcprefentation.of a new performance, his company was often hcfpake for a feries of weeks ; and no lady, whether widow, wife, or maiden, ever mentioned his name, without fome epithet of efteem or affcdtion ; fnch as t/?e dear Count ! the chcr- tn'ing Man ! the Nonpareil ! or the Angel 1 Wi'.ilc he thus fhone in the zenith of adipiratlon, it is no,t to be doubted, that he could have melted fome wealthy xlowager or opulent ward : btit being an enemy to all precir pitate engagements, he refolved to aft with great care and deliberation in an affair of fuch importance, efpecially as he did not find himfelf hurried by the importunities of want : for, fince his arrival in England, he had rather in- creafed than exhaufted his finances, by methods equally certain and fecure. In a word, he, with the afliiUnce of Ratchkali, carried on a trafllck, which yielded great profits, without fubjefting the trader to the Icaft lofs or inconvenience, pathom, for example, wore upon his fin- ger a large brilliant, which he difplayed to fuch advantage one night, at a certain nobleman's houfe, where he was prevailed upon to entertain the company with a Iblo 011 the violin, that every body prefent took notice of its un- common luftre, and it was handed about for the perufal of every individual. The water and the workmanfhip were univerfally admired ; and one among the refi, having ex- preilcd a defire of knowing the value of fuch a jewel, the count feized that opportunity of entertaining them with a Jearned difquifitlon into the nature of flones j this intror Z z ^i^cef^ j5o tHE ADVENtURES OF duccd the hiftory of the diamond in qtiefVion, xrhkh he faid bad been purchafed of an Indian trader of Fort St, George, at an under price ; fo that the prcfent proprietor could afford to fell it at a very reafonable rate ; and con- cluded with telling the company, that, for his own part, hi had been importuned to wear it by the jeweller, who imagi- ttcd it would have abetter chance for attraiing a purcha- i'er on his finger, than wjiile it remained in his own cuf- tody. This declai"a*ion was lio fooner made, than a certain lady of quality, be'poke therefufe ofthe jcwd, and deihr- ed Ferdinand to fend the owner next day to her houfe, where he accordingly waited upon her ladyfhip with tht ring, fqr which he received one hundred and fifty guineas, two thirds ofthe fum being clear gain, and equally divid- ed betwixt the affociates. Nor was this bargain fuch as reflefted difhonour upon the lady's tafte, or could be pro- duftive of ill qonfcquences to the merchant : for the me- thod of eftimating diamonds is altogether arbitrary -, and Jlatchkali, who was art exquifite lapidary, had fet it in fuch a manner as would have impofed upon any ordinary jeweller. By thefe means of introduction, the Tyroleze foon monopolized the cuftom of a great many noble fa* milies, upon which he levied large contributions, without incurring the leaft fufpicion of deceit ; he every day, out of pure cfteem and gratitude for the honour of their com- mands, entertained them with the fight of fome new trinket, which he was never permitted to carry home un- fold ; and from the profits of each job, a tax was raifed for the benefit of our adventurer. Yet his indultos were not confined to the article of jewels, which condituted only one part of his revenue i by the induflry of his underftrapper, he procured a num- ber of old crazy fiddles, which were thrown afide as lum- ber ; upon which he counterfeited the CfemOna mark, and otherwife cook'd them up with great dexterity ; fo that When he had occafion to regale the lovers of mufic, he would fend for one of thefe vamped inftrumemts, and extraft from it fuch tones as qute ravlfhed the hearers ) among whom there was always fome conceited pretender, who fpoke ill raptures of the violin, and gave our hero an FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. iSi art opporttinity of launching out in its praifc, and declar- ing it was the heft Cremona he had ever touched. This encomium never failed to inflame the delires of the au- dience, to Ibnie one of whom, he was generous enough to part with it at prime coft, that is, for twenty or thirty guineas clear profit ; for he was often able to oblige his friends in this manner, becaufe, b:ing an eminent con- noiffeuf, his countenance was folicited by all the muli- cians, who wanted to difpofe of fuch moveables. Nor did he neglet the other rcfoUrceS of a fkilful vir- tuofo. Every audtion afforded fbme picture, in which, though ir had b?en overlooked by the ignorance of the times, he recognized the ftile of a great mafter, and made a merit of recommending it to fome noble friend. This commerce he like>vife extended to medals, bronzes, bufts, intaglios, and old china, and kept divers artificers conti- nually employed in making antiques for the Englifh no- bility. Thus he went on with fuch rapidity of fucce^s in aU his endeavours, that he himfclf was aftonifhed at the infatuation he had produced. Nothing was fo wretched among the produftions of art, that he could not impofe upon the world as a capital performance ; and fo fafcna- ted were the eyes of his admirers, he could eafily have perfuaded them that a barber's bafon was an Etrurian P;- tera, and the cover of a copper pot, no other than tVe ihield of Apcus Martius. In fhort, it was become f? fa- fhionable to confult the count in every thing relating to t^fte and pohfenefs, that not a plan was drawn, not even anhoufe furnHhed without his advice and approbation ; nay, to fuch a degree did his reputation in thefe matters excel, that a particular pattern of paper-hangings was known by the name of Fathom ; and his hall was every morning crouded with upholfterers and other tradefmen, who came by order of their employers to learn his choice, and take his dire^ions. The charadler and influence he thus acquired he took tare to maintain with theutmofl afliduityandcircumfpec- tion : he never failed to appear the chief perfonage at all public diverfions and private affemblies, not only in con- tcrfatioi; and drcfs, but alfo in the article of dancing, in which |.82 THE ADVENTURES OF which he outftripped all his fellows, as far as in every other genteel accompllfiinicot. . CHAP. XXXIII. ITe attraBs the envy and ill offices of the minor knights of hit cwn ordevy over ijuham t.e obtains a cowplcat viBory. SUCH a preheminence could not be enjoyed without cxp citing the malevolence of envy and detraction, in tl;e propagation of which, none were fo induffrious as the brethren of his own order, who had, like him, made a defcent upon this ifland, and could not, without repin- ing, fee the whole harveft in the hands of one man, who vith equal art and difcretion avoided all intercourfe with their fociety. In vain they drove to difcover his life and convcrfation ; all their inquiries were baffled by the obfcurity of his origin, and that folitary fchenie which he had adopted in the beginning of his career. The whole fruit of their inveftigation amounted to no more than a certainty, that there was no family of anv confideration in Europe, known by the denomination of Fathom ; and this difcovery they did not fail to divulge for the benefit of our adventurer, who had by this time taken fuch firm root in the favour of the great, as to fet all thofe little arts at de- fiance ; and when the report reached his ear, actually made ^ his friends merry with the conjectures which had been cir- culated at his expence. His adverfaries, finding themfelvcs difappointed in this effort, held a confultation to devife other meafures agauift him, and came to a refolution of ending him by the fword, or rather of expelling him from the kingdom, by the fear of death, which they hoped he had not courage enough to refift, becaufe his deportment had been always remark- ably mild and pacific. It was upon this fuppofition, that they left, to the determination of the dice, the choice of the perfon who ihould execute their plan ; and the Iqt falling upon a Swif?, who, from the flat ion cf a foot foldier in the Dutch fervicf, out of which he had been drummed for theft, had erected hirafclf into the rank of a FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM ii4 ii felf-created chevalier i this hero fortified himfclf with a ilouble ciofe of brandy, and betook himfelf to a certairf jiotcd cofFee-houfe, with an intent to affront Count Fa- thom in public. He was lucky enough to^find our adventurer fitting at a table in converfation with fome perfbns of the firft rank* upon which he fcated himfelf in the next box, and after having introduced himfelf into their difcourfe, which li.ippened to turn upon the politics of fome German conrts ; " Count," faid he to Ferdinand, in a very ab- rupt and difagreeable manner of addrefs," I was laft night in company with fome gentlemen, among whom a difputc^ happened about " the place of your nativity ; pray, what country are you of?'* " Sir," anfwered'the other, with great po'itcnefs, " I at prefent have the honour to be of ILngiand." <' Oho!" replied the chevalier, " I afk your pardon, that is to fay, you are incog. Some people may tind it convenient to keep themfelves in that fituation." ' True,*' faid the count, " but fome people are too well known to enjoy that privilege." The Swifs being a little difconcerted at this repartee, which extracted a fmile from {he audience ; after fome paufe, obfervcd, that perfons of a certain clafs had good reafon to drop the remembrance of what they had been ; but a good citizen will not for- get his country or former condition. *' And a bad citi- zen," faith Fathom, '* cannot, if he would, provided he has met with his deferts ; a fharpcr may as well forget the ftiape of a dye, or a difcarded foldier the found of a drum.'* As the chevalier's character and ftory were not un- known, this application raifeJ an univerfal laugh at his expence, which provoked him to fuch a degree, that, ftarting up, he fwore Fathom could not have mentioned any objedt in nature that he himfeif refembled fo much ds a drum, which was exadlly typified by his emptineft and found, with this difference however, that a drum was never ncify till beaten, whereas the count would never be quiet until he fhould have undergone the fame difcipline. So faying, he laid his hand upon his fword with a mena- cing look, and walked out as if in expedlation of being followed by our adventurer, who fuftered himfelf to be detained by the company, and very calmly took notice, thai t*4 fHE ADVENTURES 6^ that his antngonlft wouUl not be ill pleafed at their inief* poiition. Perhaps he would not have comported himfelf with fuch eafe and deliberation, had not he madefuch re- marksupon thedilpofition of the chevaUer,as convinced him of his own fr.fcty. Kc liad perceived a perplexity and per- turbation in the countenance of the Swifs, when he firft en- tered the coffee-room ; his blunt and precipitate way of accofting him, feemed to denote confufion and compullion, and in the midft of his ferocity, this accurate obferver dif- cerned the trepidation of fear. By the help of thefe iign?, hk fagacity fo on comprehended the nature of his fchemes, and prepared accordingly for a formal defiance. His conjelure w^s verified next morning by a vifit from the chevalier, who taking it for granted that Fathom would not face an ai'.verfary in the fieldi becaufe he had not followed him from the cofi^ee-houfe, went tohislodg- higs with great confidence, and demanded to fee the count upon an affair that would admit of no delay. Maurice, according to his inflruftions, told him that his mafter was gone out, but defired he would have the goodnefs td repofe himfelf in a parlour, till the count's return, which he expected every moment. Ferdinand^ who had takeii poft in a proper place for obfervation, feeing his antagonift fairly admitted, took the fame road, and appearii^g be- fore him, wrapped up in a long Spanifh cloak, defired to know what had procured hira the honour of fuch an ear- ly vifit. The Swifs, raifing his voice to conceal his agita- tion, explained his errand, in demanding reparation for the injury his honour had fufi^ained the preceding day, in that odious allufion to a fcandalous report which had been raifcd by the malice of his enemies j and infifted, in a very imperious ftile, upon his attending him forthwith to the nurfery in Hyde-park. " Have a little patience, faid our adventurer with great compofure, and I will do myfelf the pleafure to vv'ait upon you in a few moments." With thefe words, he rung the bell, and calling for 3 bafon of water, laid afide his cloak, and difplayed himfelf in his fliirt, with a fword in his right hand, which was all over befmcared with recent blood, as if he had juft come from the flaughter of a foe. This phsenomenon made fuch an imprefliion upcu) the aftociibcd chevalier, x already FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. 18^ tilreadf difcompofed by the refolutc behaviour of the count, that he becams jaundiced witii terror and difmay, and while his teeth chattered in his head, told our hero he had hoped, from his known politenefs^ to have found him ready to acknowledge an injury v^hich might have been the effect of anger or mifapprehenhon, in which cafe the affair might have been compromifed to their mutual fatis- fation, without proceeding to thofe extremities^ which, among men of honour, are always accounted the laft re- fource. To thb reprefentation Ferdinand anfwered, that the affair had been of the chevalier's own feeking, Jnafmuch as he had intruded himfelf into his company, and treated him with the moft infolent and Unprovoked abufe, which plainly flowed from a premeditated deliga againft his honour and reputation ; he therefore, far from being difpofed to own himfelf in the wrong, would not even accept of a public acknowledgment from him the ag- greflbr, whom he looked upon as an infamous Iharper, and was refolvedto chaftife accordingly. Here the converfation was interrupted by the arrival of d perfon who was brought to the door in a chair, and coadufted into another apartment, from which a meflage was brought to the count, importing, that the ftranger detired to fpeak virith hirh upon bufinefs of the laft im- portance. Fathom having chid the fervant for admit- ting people without his order, deflred the Swifs to excufe him for a minute lotiger, and went into the next room ; from whence the following dialogue was overheard by this challenger. " Count," faid the ftranger^ " you are not ignorant of my pretcnfions to the heart of that young lady atwhoie houfel met you yefterday ; therefore you can- iaot be furprii'ed when I declare myfelf difpleafcd with your vilits and behavioilr to my miftrefs, and demand that you Will inii:antly promife to drop the correfpondencc.'* *' Eife what follows ?" anfvvered Ferdinand, v/ith a cool and temperate voice. ** My refentment and immediate defiance, replied the other ; for the only alternative I prapole, is. to forego your defign upon that lady, or to tieclde our prctenfions by the 1 vrord." Our htro having expreffed a regard for this vlfitanf, as th? fon of a gentleman wbooi he honoured, vns at the Vol. L a a t paijis I&6 THE ADVENTURES OF pains to reprePent the unreafonablenefs of his demartdl, ani the folly of his prefuniption ; and earnefl:ly exhorted him: to put the ifTiic of his caufe upon a more fafe and equita- ble footing. But this admonition, rnftead of appealing the wrath, feemcd to inflame the relentment of the op- 'ponent, who fwore he would not leave him until hcJ ihould have accompliflied the purport of his errand. In vain our adventurer requefted half an hour for the dif- patch of fome urgent bulinefs, in which he was engaged with a gentleman in the other parlour : this impetuous rival rejected all the terms he could vH'opofe, and even challenged him to decide the controverfy upon the fpot j ill! expedient to which the other hr.ving alTented with re- Juclance, the door was fecured, the fwords unfheathed, and an hot engagement enfued, to the inexpreffible plea- ihre of the Swifs, who did not doabt that he himfelf would be fcreened from all danger by the event of this rencounter 5 nevertliel'efs, his hoper was difappointed in the defeat of the Granger, who was quickly dii'armed, in con- fequence of a wound through the fword arm ; upon which occafion Fathom was heard to fay, that, in confr- tieration of his youth and family, he had fpared his life ; but he would not act with the fame tendtrnefs towards any other antagonift. He then bound up the limb he had diiabled, conducted the vanquifted party to his chair, re- joined the chevaKer with a ferene countenance, and afk- jng pardon for having detained him fo long, propofed they Ihould inftantly fet out in an hackney coach for the place of appointment. The ftratagem, thus condadted, had all the fiiccefs the inventor could defire. The fear of the Swifs had rifen al- inoft to an extafy before the count quitted the room; but after this iham battle, which had been preconcerted betwiixt our adventurer and his friend Ratchlcah, the che- valier's terrors were unfpeakable. He corWidered Fathom as a devil incarfiate, and went into the coach as a malefac- tor bound for Tyburn. He would have gladly compound- ed for the lofs of a leg or arm, and entertained fome tranfient gleams of hope, that he fliould efcape for half a dozen flefh wounds, which he would have willingly re^ ceivcd, as the price of his prefuinption j but thefc hopes / were FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. 187 tvcre baniflied by the remembrance of that dreadful de- claration which he had heard the count make, after ha- ving overcome his laft advcrfary ; and he continued un- der the power of the moft infupportable pannic, until the carriage halted at Hyde-park-corner, where he crawled forth in a moft piteous and lamentable condition ; fo that when they reached the fpot, he was fcarce able to Hand. Here he made an eflfort to fpeak, and propofed an ac- commodation upon a new plan, by which he promifed to leave his caufe to the arbitrement of thofe gentlemen who , were prefent at the rupture, and to aik pardon of thu count, provided he Ihould be found guilty of a trefpafs upon good manners : but this propofal would not fatisfy the implacable Ferdinand, who perceiving the agony of the Swifs, refolv.ed to make the moft of tiie adventure ; and giving him to underftand he was not a man to b? trilled with, deiired him to draw without further pream- ble. Ths compelleti, the unfortunate gamefter pulled off his coat, and putting himfelf in a pofture, to ufe the words of Nym, ' winked, and held out his cold iron." Our adventurer, far from making a gentle ufe of the advantages he pofieiTed, fiercely attacked him, while he was incapable of making refiftance, and aiming at a flelliy part, ran him through the arm and outlide of the Ihoulder at the very firft pafs : the chevalier, already ftupified with the horror of expe(5tation, no fooner felt his adverfary's point in his body, than he fell to the ground, and con- cluding he was no longer a man for this world, began to crofs himfelf witli great devotion, while Fathom walked home deliberately, and in his way lent a couple df chair- men to the alliltaace of the wounded ki\ight. This atchievement, which could not be concealed from the knowledge of the public, not only furnilhed the character of Fathom with frelh wreaths of admiration and applaufe, but like wife efFedtually fecured him from any future attempts of his enemies, to whom the Swils, for his own fake, had communicated fuch terrible ideas f his valour, as over-awed the whole community. A a 2 CHAP, tat ADVENTURES OF C fj A P. XXXIV. Heptrfirms another exploit ^ that conveys a true iqea ofhisgraz t'xtude and honour. IT was not long after this celebrated viftory that he was invited to fpcnd part of the fumnier at the houfe of a country gentleman, who lived about one hundred miles from London, pofieiTed of a very opulent fortune, the greateft part of which was expended in ae dif- fuled through all the paffions of her heart ; he congratu- lated himfelf upon the fure afcendancy he had gained over her in this particular ; and forthwith began to exe- cute the plan he had erected for her deftruftion. That he might the more efFe(Elually deceive the vigilance of her father's wife, he threw fuch a dafti of affeStation in his complaifance towards Celinda, as could not efcape the notice of that prying matron, though it was not palpable enough to difoblige the young lady herfelf, who couid not fo well dillinguifh between overftrained courtefy and real good breeding; this behaviour fci eened him from the fufpi- cion of the family, who confidered it as an effort of polite- cefs to cover his indifference and difguft for the daughter of fcisfriend, who had by thistime given Tome reafonto believe ihe looked upon him with the eyes of affection ; fo that the opportunities lie enjoyed of converiing with her in private, were Icfs liable to intrufion or inquiry. Indeed, |Vom what I have already obfervcd, touching the fenti- ments 9o THE ADVENTURES OF ments of her ftep-dame, that lady, far from taking rr.ea- fures for thwarting our hero's dclign, would have rejoi- ced at the execution of it ; and, had ihe been informed of his intpnt, might have fallen upon fome method to facili- tate the enterprit'.e ; but as he folely depended upon his own talents, he never dreamed of foiiciting fuch an auxi- liary. , Under cover of inftructing and accomplifhing her in the xercife of mufick, he could not want occafions for promo- ting his aim; when, after having foothed her fenfe of hear- ing, even to a degree of ravishment, fo as to extort from her an exclamation, importing, that he was furely fome- thing fupcrnatural I he never failed to whifper fome inii- dious compliment or tale of love, exquifitely Anted to the emotions of her foul. Thus was her heart infenlibly fubdued ; though more than half his work was ft ill un- done j for, at ail times, fhe difclofed fuch purity of fen- timent, fuch inviolable attachment to religion and virtue, and feemed fo averfe to all forts of inflammatory difcourfe, that he durft not prefume, upon the footing he had gained in her afFe6 THE ADVENTURE c? OF iient lover, and feverely reproached him for the arts he hal ufed to Ihipwreck her innocence and peace. Such expoltulations are extremely unleafonable when addrefied to a man well nigh fated with the effects of his tonqueft; they acl like ftrong blafts of wind applied to embers almoftextlnguiflied, which, inftead of reviving the ijame, fcatter and dcftroy every remaining particle of tire. Our adventurer, in tlie midft of his pecallarities, had in- eonftancy in common with the reft of his fex. More thaa half cbyed with the poiTcffion of Gelinda, he could not fail to be difgufted with her upbnidings : and had fhe not been the daughter of a gentleman whole friendlhip he did not think it his intereft to forfeit, he would liave dropt this correfpondence without reluftance or helitation : but, a.s he had meafures to keep witla a family of fuch confe- t^uencf, he conltrained his inclinationa ib far, as to coun- terfeit thofe raptures he no longer felt, and found means to appeafe thofe intervening tumults of her grief. Forefoiing, however, that it would not be always in his power to conlblc her on thefe terms ; he refolved, if pof- iible, to divide her affection, which now glowed upon him tfio intenfely -, and wkh that view, whenever flie complain- ed pf the vapt)urs or dejelion, he prefcribed, and even in- iifled upon her fwallowing certain cordials of the raofb pa- latiible compolltion, without which he never travelled j and thefe produced fuch agreeable reveries and flow of iplrjts, that fhe gradually became enamoured of intoxi- cation ; v/hile he encouraged the pernicious paffion, by exprefling the moft extravagant applaufe and admiration at the wild, irregular fallies it produced. Withoxit having' ilrfr made this divernon, he would have found it imprac- ticable to leave the hbufe in tranquillity; but when this be- witching philtre grew into an habit, her attachment to Fer- dinand was infeniibly diflblved ; (lie began to bear his neg~ lct with indificrcnce, and fcqueftring herfelf from the reft of the family, ufed to folicit this new ally for confolation. Having thus put the finifliing ftroke to tlie daughter's ruin, he took leave of the father with many acknowledge- ments and expreliions of gratitude for his hofj^tality an4 friendlhip, and riding crols the Country to Brillol, took up hb habitation near the Hot-well, where he ftaid during thtj FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. 197 the remaining part of the feafon. As for the miferable Cclinda, Ihc became more and more addicted to the vices in which flie had been initiated by his fuperlative perfidy and craft, until ihc was quite abandoned by decency and caution : her father's heart was torn with anguifh, while bis wife rejoiced in her fall : at length, her ideas were quite debaled by her infirmity j fhe grew every day more and more fenfual and degenerate, and contraer to furnifh him with the opportunity he wanted, by counterfeiting an indifpofition, for the cure of which fhe knew his advice would be implored. This was the beginning of an acquaintance, which was foon improved to his wilh , and fowell did fhe manage her attradiions, as in fome meafure to fix the inconftancy of his difpofition ; for, at the end of the feafon, his pafiion-was not fated ; and they concerted the means of continuing their com- m-rc, even after their return to London. ' This intercourfe e^ftually anfwered the purphfc of the huCband, who had been decoyed it^to matrimony, by the cunning of his fpoufe, whom he had privately kept as a concubine before marriage. Confcious of her own preca- rious fituation, Ihe had refolved to impofe upon the infir- mities of Trapwefl, and feigning herfelf pregnant, gave him to underlland Ihe could no longer conceal her condi- tion from the knowledge of her brother, v/ho was an of- ficer in the army, and of fuch violent pafiions, that fliould he once dif* over her backfliding, he would undoubtedly wipe away the ftains of his family-dilhonour with her own blood, as well as that of her keeper. The citizen, to pre- vent fuch a cataftrophe, took her to wife ; but foon after j^erceiving ihe trick which had been played upon him, fet his invention at work, and at length contrived a fcheme v^hich he thought Avould enable him, not only to retrieve his liberty, but alfo indemnify himfelf for the mortifica- tion he had undergone. Far from creating any domeftic difturl">ance, byupbraid- ing her with her finefie, he feemed perfeJ^}y well pleafed with his acquifitioa ; and as he knew her void of any prin- ciple, and extremely addlcled to pleafure, he chofe proper occafions to infinnate, t'l^t ilie might gratify her ovm in- clination, and at the fame ti-me turn her beauty to gccd account. -She ioyfnllv iiltened to thefe remonftrances. Vol. J. f ' C c and ao2 THE ADVENTURES OF and in confequence of their mutual agreement, (he reparr- ed to Briftol-fpring, on pretence of an ill ftate of healthy accompanied by her fifter-in-kw, whom they did not think proper to intruft: with the real motive of her journey. Fa- thom's perfon was agreeable, and his finances fuppofed to be in flourifhing order ; therefore, flae feleted him from the herd of gallants, as a proper facrifice to the powers which fhe adored ; and on her arrival in London, made her huf- band acquainted with the importance of her conqueft. Trapwell overwhelmed her witli carefles and praife for her difcreet and dutiful conduct, and faithfully promifed that {he fliould pocket, in her own privy purfe, one half of the fpoils that fliould be gathered from her gallant, whom Ihe therefore undertook to betray, after he had fwore, in the moft folemn manner, that his intention was not to bring the affair to a pubhc trial, which would redound to his own difgrace, but to extort a round fum of money from the Count, byway of compofition. Confiding in this protefta- tion, flie, in a few days, gave him intelligence of an affig- nation (lie had mide with our adventurer, at a certain bag- nio near Covent garden; upon which he fecured the affif- tance of a particular friend and his own journeyman, with whom, and a conftablc, he repaired to the place of ren- dezvous, where he waited in an adjoining room according to the dire:led. CHAP. XXXVII. Fr^j caufe for exerting his equatiimiiy and fortitude . THE reader may have obferved, that Fathom, with all his circumfpection, had a weak fide, which expo- fed him to fundry miichances : this was his covetoufnefs, which on iome occafions became too hard for his difcre- tion : at this period of time, it was, by the circumftan- ces of his fituation, inHamed to a degree of rapacity. He was now prevailed upon to take a hand at whift, or piquet, and even to wield the hazard-box ; though he had hither- to declared himfeif an irreconcileable enemy to all forts of play \ and fo uncommon was his fuccefs and dexterity at thefe exercifes, as to furprize his acquaintance, and a- roufe the iufpicion of fome people, who repined at his profperity. But in nothing was his condadl more inexcufeable, than in giving way to the dangerous temerity of RatchkaU, which he had been always at pains to rellrain, and per- mitting him to pradlife the fame fraud upon an Englifli nobleman, which had been executed upon himfelf at Franckfort. In other words, the Tyroleze by the canal of Ferdinand's finger and recommendation, fold a pebble for a real brilliant, and in a few days the cheat was dif- f oyered, to the ir.finite confuilon of our adventurer, whq jiever-> 2o6 THE ADVENTURES OF neverthelefs affumed the guife of innocence with fo mucii art, and exprefTed luch indignation againft the villain who had impofed upon his judgment and unfufpedting gene- rofity, that his lordfhip acquitted him cf any Ihare in the deceit and contented himfelf with the reftitution, which he infifted upon making out of his own pocket, until he Ihould be able to apprehend the rogue, who had thought proper to abfcond for his own fafety. In fpite of all this exculpation, his cbarafter did not fail to retain a fort of ftigma, which indeed the plainell: proofs of innocence are hardly able to efface ; and his connexion wiih fuch a pal- pable knave as the Tyroleze appeared to be, had an effect to his prejudice in the minds of all thofe who were privy to the occurrence. When a man's reputation is once brought in queftlon, every trifle is, by the malevolence of mankind, magnified inta a ftrong prefumption againft the culprit : a few whif- pers communicated by the envious mouth of flander, which he can have no opportunity to anfwer and refute, fliall, in the opinion of the world, convi^him of the moft horrid crimes, and for one hypocrite who is decked with the honours of virtue, there are twenty good men who fuffcr the ignominy of vice ; fo well difpofed are indivi- duals to trample upon the fame of their fellow-creatures. If the moft unblemifhed merit is not protee under no fort of reftraint ; for though we dine at one table, every individual calls and. pays for his own racfs. Our converfation, fuch as it is^ will not, I hope, be diH-greeable ; and though we have not opportunities of breathing the pure Arcadian ^ir, and can- not, " under the Ihade ot melancholy boughs, lofe and negle;d without cartains fupplied the place of a canopy, and in- itead of a crown his majefty wore a woolen night-cap* Yet, in fpite of thefe difadvantages, there was an air of dignity in his deportment, and a rjice phyfiognomifl would have perceived fomethiug majcilic in the features of his countenance. He was certainly a perfonage of a very prepofTeffing mien j his manners were engaging ; his converfation a- grceable ; and any man whoie heart was fubjeft to the meltings of humanity, would have deplored his diftrcfs, and looked upon him as a moll pathetic infiance of that mifcrable revei fe, to which all human grandeur is expof- ed. His fall was even greater than that of Belifarius, who, after having obtained many glorious vitTtories over the enemies of his country, is faid to have been reduced to fuch extremity of indigence, that in his old age, when he was deprived of his eye iight, he fat upon the high way like a common mendicant, imploring the charity of paf- fengers, in the piteous exclamation of Date obolum Belifa- rio ; that is, " Spare a farthing to your poor old foldier Belifarius." I fay, this general's difgrace was not fo re- markable as that of Theodore, becaufe he was the fer- vant of Juftinian, confequently liis fortune depended upon the nod of that emperor -, whereas the other adlually pof- iefled the throne of fovereignty by the beft of ail titles, namely, the unanimous ele<^t:on of the people over whom he reigned ; and attracted the eyes of all Europe, by the efforts he made in breaking the bands of oppreffion, and vindicating that liberty which is the birthright of man. The Englifh of former days, alike renowned for gerfer- rofity and valour, treated thofc hoftile princes whofe fate it was to wear their chains, with fuch delicacy of bcne- Tolence, as even difpelled the horrors of captivity ; but" their pofterity of this refwied age feel no compun(!^ion at feeing an tmfortunate monarch, t'ncir former friend, ally,- :: and- FERDINAND COinSTT FAtHOM. "iJ/ and partizan, languifli amidft the miferics of a loathfome gaol, for a paultry debt contra5ted in their own fcrvice. But morahzing apart, our hero had not long converfed with tliis extraordiuary debtor, who, in his prefent con- dition, affumed no other title thaia that of Baron, than he perceived in him a fpirit of Qn^ixotifm, which all his experience, together with the viciflltudes of his fortune, had not been able to overcome ; not that his ideas foared to fuch a pitch of extravagant hope as that which took poirelfion of his mefs-mates, who frequently quarrelled one with another, about the degrees of favour to which they fliould be entitled after the king's rertoration ; but he firmly believed that aflairs would fpeedily take fuch a turn in Italy, as would point out to the Englilh court the ex- pediency of employing him again ; and this perfuafiou ieemed to fupport him againil every fpecies of poverty and mortification. While they werebufy in trimming the balance of power on the other llde of the Alps, their deliberations were interrupted by the arrival of a fcullion, who came to re- ceive their orders touching the bill of fare for dinner, and his majeily found much more dijSlculty in fettling this im- portant concern, than in compromifing all the differences between the emperor and the queen of Spain. At length, however, General Macleaver undertook the office of pur- veyor for his prince ; captain Minikin inilfted upon treat- ing the count, and in a little time the table was covered with a cloth, which, for the fake of my delicate readers, I fhall not attempt to defcribe. At this period they were joined by Sir Mungo Bare- bones, who having found means to purchafe a couple of mutton chops, had cooked amefs of broth, which he now brought in a faucepan to the general rendeizvous : this was the moft remarkable objel which had hitherto pre- fented itfelf to the eyes of Fathom : being naturally of a meagre habit, he was by indigence and hard ftudy wore almoft to the bone, and fo bended towards the earth, that, in walking, his body defcribed at leafk 150 degrees of a circle. The want of {lockings and fnoes he fiip- plied with a jockey ftraight boot and an half jack. His' thighs and middle were cafed in a monflrous pair of V>L, I. F f f brown $26 THE ADVENTURES OF brown trunk breeches, which the keeper bought for his ufe, from the executor of a Dutch feaman who had lately died in the jail : his (hirt reianed no fign;- of its original colour, his body was fhrouded in an old greafy tattere4 plaid nightgown i a blue and white handkerchief fur- rounded his head, and his looks betokened that immenf load of care, which he had voluntarily incurred for the eternal falvation of finners. Yet this figure uncouth as jt was, made his complimeitts to our adventurer in terms of the moft elegant addrefs, and in the courfe of conver- fation difclofed a great fund of valuable knowledge. He ha*', appeared in the great world, and bore divers offices of uigoity and truft with univerfal applaufe : his courage was undoubted, his morals were unimpcached, and his peHon held in great veneration and efleem ; when his evil genius engaged him in the ftudy of Hebrew, and the my- ileries of the Jewifh religion, which fairly diforidered hi|. brain, and rendered him incapable of managing his tem- poral afFairs.When he ought to have been employed in the fu:ilious of his port:, he was always rapt in vilionary con- ferences with Mofes on the Mount ; rather than regulate the ceconomy of his houfehold, he chufe to exert his en- deavours in fettling the precife meaning of the word E/o- kirn ; and having difcovered that now the period was come when the Jews and Gentiles would be converted, he poft- poned every other confideration, in order to facilitate tha^ great and glorious event. By this time, Ferdinand had feen every member of the club, except the French chevalier,' who feemed to be quite neglefted by the (bciety ; for his name was not once men- tioned during this communication, and they fat down to dinner, without afking whether he was dead or alive. The king regaled himfelf with a plate of ox cheek; the major, who complained that his appetite had forfaken bim, amuf- ed himfelf with fome forty hard eggs, malaxed with fait butter ; the knight indulged upon his foup and bouillie, and the captain entertained our adventurer with a neck of veal roafted, with potatoes ; but before Fathom could make ufe of his knife and fork, he was fummoned to the door, where he found the chevalier in great agitation, his eyes fparkling like coals of fire. ' Our FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. 227 Our hero was not a little furprized at this apparition, who having alked pardon for the freedom he had ufed, obferved, that underftanding the count was a foreigner, he could not difpenfe with appealing to him concerning an outrage he had fufFered from the keeper, who, with- out any regard to his rank, or misfor<(unes, had been bafe enough to refufe him credit for a few neceflaric-s until he could have a remittance from his fteward in France ; he therefore conjured count Fathom, as a ftranger and nobleman like himfelf, to be the mefletger of a defiance, which he refolved to lend to that brutal goaler, that for the future he might learn to make proper d.ftinlions in the exercifc of his fundlion. Fathom, who had no inclination to offend this choleric Frenchman, affured him that he might depend upon his friendihip ; and in the mean time prevailed upon him to ac- cept of afmall fupply, in confcquenceof which, he procured a pound of faufages, andjoinedthereft of the company with- out delay ; making a very fiiirable addition to fuch anaflem- blage of rarities. Tho' his age did not exceed thirty years, his beard,which was of a brindled hue, flowed down, like Aaron's, to his middle ; upon his legs he wore red {lockings roiled up over the joint of the knee, his breeches were of blue drab with vellum buttonholes, and gartersof gold lace, his waiftcoat of fcarlet, his coat of rufty black cloth, his hair twiited into a ramellie, hung down to his rump, of the colour of jet, and his hat was adorned with a white feather. This original had formed many ingenious fchemes to increafe the glory and grandeur of France, but was dif- couraged by cardinal Fieury, who, in all appearance, jea- lous of his great talents, not only rejefted his projefts, but even font him to prifon, on preter.ce of being otiTr.ded at his impertinence. Perceiving that, like the prophet, he had no honour in his own country, Ke no fooner ob- tained his releafe, than he retired to England, where he was prompted by his philanthropy, to propofe an expe- dient to our miniftry, which would have faved a vaft ef- fulion of blood and treafure ; this was an agreement be- tween the queen of Hungary and the late emperor, fo de- cide thf ir prcteniions bv a fingle combat ; in whjch cafe Ff2 hff 228 THE ADVENTURES OF he oflered himfelfas the Bavarian champion; but in this endeavour he alfo proved unluccefsful : then turning his- attention to the delights of poetry, he became lb enamour- ed of tlie mufe, that he ncgleVed every other coniider- ation, jmd fhc, 9s ufual, gradually conduced him to the author's nev the French language, *'Thou art a prophane wretch, mark- ed out for the vengeance of Heaven, whofe unworthy mi- nifter I am, and here thou Ihalt fall by the fword of the Lord and of Gideon." The chevalier, untcrrificd by this dreadful falutatlon, d 'fired he would accompany him to a more convenient place ; and the world might have been deprived of one or both thefe knights-errant, had not General Macleaver, at the defirc of his majelly, interpofed, and found means to bring matters to an accommodation. In the afternoon, the focicty was vifited by the major's coufin and her daughters, who no fooner appeared, than they were recognized by our adventurer ; and his acquain- tance with them renewed in fuch a manner as alarmed the delicacy of Captain Minikin, who in the evening repaired to the count's apartment, and, with a very formal phyfi- ognomy, accofted hina in thefe words : *' Sir, I beg par- 4on for this intrufion ; but I come to confult you about an affair in which my honour is concerned ; and a foldier without honour, you l?now, is no better than a body whh- out *3 THE ADVENTURES OF out a foul. I have always admired that fpeech of Hotfpur, in the firft part of Henry the fourth : ** By Heaven, methinks it were an eafy leap, " To pluck bright honour from the pale fac'd moon ; ** Or dive into the bottom of the deep, ** Where fathom line could never touch the ground, ** And pluck up drowned honour by the locks." There is a boldncfs and eafe in the expreffion, and the Images are very pidturcfque. But, without any further preamble ; pray, Sir, give me leave to a(k how long you have been acquainted with thofe ladies who drank tea with us this aftern<-on ? You'll forgive the queftion, Sir, when I tell you that major Macleaver introduced Mrs Minikin to them as to ladies of chara6l:er ; and I don't know how. Sir, I have a f rt oiprejlntimtnt that my wife has been impofed upon. Perhaps I may be miftaken, and God grant I may. But there was Tije ne fpuai quoy in their behaviour to-day, which begins to alarm my fufpi- cion. Sir, I have nothing but my reputation to depend upon, and I hope you will exc ufe me, when I earneftly beg to know what rauk they maintam in life." Fathom, without minding the confequence, toM liim with a fimper, that he knew them to be very good na- tured ladies, who devoted tJ^emfelves ro the happinefs of tnanknd. This explar^ati'^n had no fooner efcaped fromi his lips than the captam's lace began to glow with in- dignation, his f yes leen.ed burning from their fpheres, he 1 welled to twice his natural dimenfions, and raiflng himfelf on his t ptoe?^, pronounced in a ftrain that enu- lated thunder, ** Blood, Sir ! you fcem to make very light of the matter . but it is no joke to me, I'll affure you : and Macleaver (hall fee that I am not to be affronted with impunity. Sir, I fliall take it as a lingular favour, if you will be the bearer of a billet to him, which 1 fhall write in three words : nay, Sir, you mull give me leave to iniifk upon it, as you are the only gentleman of our mefs whom 1 can intrull with an affair of this nature." I Fathom FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. 23 1 Fathom, rather that run the rifque of difobliging fuch a pun<^tilious warrior, after having hi vain attempted to dif- fuade him from his purpofe, undertook to carry the chal- lenge, which was imiuediately penned in thcie words j ** Sir, ** You have violated my honour, in impofing upon ** Mrs Minikin, your pretended coulins, as ladies of yir- tue and reputation ; 1 therefore demand fuch fatisfac- '* tipn as a foldier ought to receive, and expc^ you will ** adjuft with my friend Count Fathom the t.erms upon " which you ihall be met by the much injured ** GOLIAH MmiEXN.'* This morgeau being fealed and direfted, was forthwith (carried by our adventurer to the lodgings of the major, who had by this time retired to reft, but liearing the count's voice, he got up and opened the door in cuerpoy tQ the aftonifhment of Ferdinand, who had never before feen fuch an Herculean figure. He made an apology for receiving the count in his birth-day fuit, to which, he faid, he was reduced by the heat of his conftitution, tho* he might have affigned a more adequate caufe, by owning that his fhirt was in the hands of his walherwoman ; then ihrouding himfelf in a blanket, dellred to know what had procured him the honour of fuch an extraordinary vifit. He read the letter with great compofiire, like a man ac- cuftomed to fuch intercourfe ; then addreffing himfelf to the bearer, " 1 will be after diverting the gentleman, faid he, in any manner he Ihall think proper : but, by Jefus \ this is no place for fuch amufements ; becaufe, as you well know, my dear count, if both (liould be killed by |:he chanpe of war, neither of i|s will be able to efcape, and after the breath is out of his body, he will make but a forry excufe to his family and friends. But that is nq concern of mine, and therefore I am ready to pleafe him in his own way. Fathom approved of his remarks, which he reinforced ^ith fundry confiderations to the fame purpofe, an.1 beg- ged the afliftance of the major's advice, in finding Tome '' expedient 232 THE ADVENTURES OF expedient to termmate the affair without bloodfhed, that no troublefome confcquences might enfue either to Iiim or to his antagonift, who, in fpite of tliis over- ftrained formality, feemed to be a perfon of worth and good nature. " With all my heart, faid the generous Hibernian ; I have a great regard for the little man, and my own charaler is not to ieek at this time of day. I have fe:ved a long apprenticeflnip to lighting, as this fame carcafe can teftify, and if he compels me to run hiin through the body, by my fhoul I fhall do it in a friendly manner." So faying, he threw afide the blanket, and difplayed fears and learns innumerable upon his body, which ap- peared like an old patched leathern doublet. *' I remem- i>er, proceeded this champion, when I was a (lave at Al- giers, Murphy Macmorris and I happened to have fome difference in the bagnio ; upon which he bad me turn out. Arra, for what ? faid I ; here are no weapons that a gentleman can ufe, and you would not be fuch a negro as to box like an Englifh carman. After he had puzzled liimfelf for fome time, he propofed that we fliould retire into a corner, and funk at one another with brimftone, till one cf us fhould give out. Accordingly we crammed lialfa dozen of tobacco pipes withfulphur, and fetting foot to foot, began to fmoke, and kept a conrtant fire, until Macmorris dropped down ; then I threw away my pipe, and taking poor Murphy in my arms, * What, are you dead r" faid I, " if you are dead, fpeak." * No, by Je- fus ! cried he, I an't dead, but I'm fpeechlefs." So be owned I had obtained the victory, and we were as good friends as e^'er. Now if Mr Minikin thinks proper to put the affair upon the fame iffuc, I will fmoke a pipe of brimftone with him to-morrow morning, and if I cry put firft, I will be after alking pardon for this fuppol'ed af- fiont. Fathom could not help laughing at the propofal, to .which, however, he objected on accpunt of Minikin's deli- cate conftitution, which might fuffer more detriment from breathing in an atmofphere of fulphur, than from ihe difcharge of a piftol, or the thruft of a fmall fword- He therefore fuggefted anojher expedient in lieu of the liilphur FERDINAND COUNT FATHOM. ajj llil^i^nir, namely, the gum called Affafcstida, ^'hlch, tho* abundantly nauieous, could have no dangerous effedt up- on the infirm texture of ttie lieutenant's lungs. This hint being relilhed by the m.ijor, our advesturer returned to liis principal, and having repeated the other's arguments againft the ufe of mortal inllrWents, defcribed the fuc- cedaneum, which he had concerted with Macleaver. The cnptain at firft believed this fcheme vras calculated for iiibjecfting him to the ridicule of his fellow prifoners, and began to ftorm with great violence ; but by the aflurances and addrefs of Fathom, he was at length reconciled to the plan, and preparations were made on each fide for this duel, which was actually fmoaked next day, about noon, iu a Imall ciofet detached from the challenger's apartment, and within hearing of h s majefty and all his cert, aflera- hled as witneiTes and umpires of the conteft. The combatants being locked up together, began to ply their engines with great fury, and it was not long be- fore captain Minikin perceived he had a manifeft advan- tage over his antagonift. For his organs were fami- liarized to the effluvia of his drug, which he had fre- quently ufed in the courfe of an hypochondriac diforder ; xvhereas Macleaver, who was a ftranger to all forts of me- dicine, by his wry faces and attempts to puke, exprefled the utmolt abhorrence of the ftnell that invaded his no- ftrils. Neverthelefs, refolving to hold out to the laft ex- tremity, he continued in adtion until the ciofet was filled with fuch an intolerable vapour as difcompofed the whole economy of his intrails, and com.pelled him to difgorge his breakift in the face of his opponent, whofe nerves were fo difconcerted by this difagreeable and unforefeen dif- churge, that he fell back into his chair in a fwoon, and the major bellowed aloud for affiftance. The door being opened, he ran dire<5lly to a windov/, to inhale the frefh air, while the captain recovering from his fit, complained of Macleaver's unfair proceedings, and demanded jufticc of the arbitrators, who decided in his favour ; and the major being prevailed upon to alk pardon for having in- troduced Mrs Minikin to women of rotten reputation, the parties were reconciled to each other, and peace and con- cord re-eftablilhed in the mefs. Vol. I. G g Fathom J/OH TA^ TV io ) -^ V\^\^'i'A>'\ \sA 'yws^/.Wuo''^ ,n !i/'jJov -iM>A wnmii nt'. CONTENTS Qf V Q L. II. CHAP. XLH. AN unexpe51;ed rencounter, and an happy revolution in tlic affairs of our Adventurer, - - - Page I CHAP. XLIIF. rathom juftifics the proverb, What's bred in the bone will never come out of the flefli," - - - 6 C H A P. XLIV. ' Anecdotes of poverty, and experiments for the benefit of thofe whom it may concern , - - - IQ CHAP. XLV. Renaldo's diftrcfs deepens, and Fathom's plot thickens, - 1 7 CHAP. Xl.VI. Our adyenturer becomes abfolute in his power over the pafiions of his friends, and cffeits one half of his aim, - az CHAP. XLVir. The art of borrowing further explained, and an account of a ftrange phacomenon, - - r 34 CHAP. XLVIII. Courrt' Fathom unmalks his battery ; is repulfed ; and varies his opera- tions without effetft, - - - 41 CHAP. XLIX. Monlmia's honour is proteded by the interpoGtion of Heaven, 48 CHAP. L. ^athom fhifts the fccne, and appears in a new characftcr, - 57 Vol. [I a t CHAP. ii CONTENTS ox VOL. ll. CHAP. LI. Triumphs over a medical rival, - - - P. 6j; CHAP. LII. Repairs to the metropolis, and enrols himfelf among tiic fons of Pxan, 74 CHAP. LIIT. Acquires employment in confequence of a lucky mifcarriage, - 80 CHAP. LIV. His Eclipfc, and gradual Declination, - - 86 CHAP. LV. After divers unfuccefiful efforts, lie has rccourfc to the matrimnuial coofc, - - - 91 CHAP. LVL ^n which his fortune Is effcduaily flrangltd, - - 99 CHAP. LVII. Pathom being fafely hcufed, the reader is entertained with a retrof- pcd . - i. 104 CHAP. Lvm. Renaldo abridges the proceedings at law, and approres himielf the fon of his father, - - - 109 c n A P. LIX. He is the mclTengcr of happinefs to his fiftcr, who removes the film which had long obftru>5led his penetration, with regard to count Fatliom, - - ill CHAP. LX He'.recompcnfcs the attachment of his friend; and receives a letter that reduces iiim to the verge of death and diftradlion, iaj CHAP. LXI. RenalJo meets with a living monument ofjuftice, and cnconcters a personage of feme note in thcfe memairs, - 1 33 CHAP. LXII. Hli return to England and midnight pilgrimage to Monimia'* tomb, ... 1^,3 CHAP. CONTENTS o VOL. ll. u, CHAP. LXIII. He renews the rites of forrow, and is cntrinced, - P. 149 CHAP. LXIV. The myftery unfolded. Another recognition, which, it is to be hoped the reader could not forclee, - 158 CHAP. LXV. AtetrofpeAive link, neceffary for the concatenation of thcfe memoirs, i62 CHAP. LXVI. The Hiftory draws near a Period, - 1 76 CHAP. LXVII. The longeft, and the laft, - xSp 1*1 i :",li THE ADVENTURES O F Ferdinand Count Fathom^ CHAP. XLII. An umapeBed rencounter^ and an happy revolution in ihi affairs ef our Adventurer, AS (lie did not lodge within the preclndls of this gar- rifon, ihe was one day, after tea, condu^led to the gate by the captain and the count, and juft as they ap- proached the turnkey's lodge, our hero's eyes were ftruck: with the apparition of his old copipanion Renaldo, fon of his benefadtor and patron the count de Mclvile. What were the emotions of his foul, when he faw that young gentleman enter the prifon, and advance towards hii-n, after having fpoke to the goaler ! He never doubted that, being informed of his confinement, he was come to up- braid hifn with his villany and ingratitude, and he in vain endeavoured to recolIetSt himfelf from that terror and guilty confuiion which his appearance had infpired ; when the ftranger lifting up his eyes, ftarted back with figns of extreme amazement, and, after a confiderable paufe, ex- claimed, " Heaven and earth ! fure my eyes do not Ie- ceive me ! is not your name Fathom ? it is, it muft be my old friend and companion, the lofs of whom I have fo long regreted !*' With thefe words, he ran towards our adventurer, and while he clafped him hi his arms, with Vol, II. t A ' at a " THE ADVENTURES OF U the eag^n^s of aflcction, proteiled that this was one of the hap|)iefl: days he had ever feen. Ferduiand, v/ho from this falutation conduded him- felf ftill in poficlTion of Renaldo's good opinion, was not deficient in exprtfiions of tendernefs and joy : he return- ed his embraces with equal ardour, the tears trickled down his checks, and that perturbation which proceeded from confcious perfidy and fear, was mifiaken by the unfuf- pecling Hungarian for the fheer effecr, and occauonaUy mentioned fome anecdotes of the family in Scotland, gave him to underftand, that flic had married a merchant in Jjondon, who by repeated lofTcs in trade had been reduced to indigence, and afterwards confined in prifon, where he then lay a breathlefs corfe, having left her in the utmoft extren.ity of wretchedrefs and want, with two young children in the fmall pox, and an incurable cancer ia ozie of her own breads. Indeed tlic picture fhe drew was fo moving, and her expreflions fo fenlibly pathetic, thatnoperfon, whofe heart wasnotaltogethcr callous, could perufe it without emotion. Renaldo had font two gui- neas by the meffenger, whom fhe had reprefented as a truf- ty forvant, whore fidelity had been proof againft all the diftrefs of her miftrefs : and he was now arrived, in or- der to reinforce his lx)unty. Fathom, in the conicioufncfs of his own practices, inv- mediately comprehended the fcheme of this letter, and confidently aliured him, that no fuch perfon refided in the prifon, or in any other place ; and when his friend applied for information to the keeper, thefe afllirances Were coniirnied \ and that flcrn janitor told him, he had, been impofcd up6n by a flale trick, which was often prac- tifed upon ftrangers, by a fet of iharpcrs, who made it their bufincfs to pick up hints of intelligence relating to private faniilies, upon which they build fuch fuperftruc- turcs of fraud and impofition. Howevvas not quite fo untra