rnia 
 ,1

 
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 THE HELM, 
 
 THE SWORD, AND THE CROSS: 
 
 A LIFE I^ARKATIVE. 
 
 BY ALFRED M. LORRAIN, 
 
 '/ 
 
 OP THE CINCINNATI CONFERENCE. 
 
 CINCINNATI: 
 
 PUBLISHED BY POE & HITCHCOCK; 
 
 CORNER OF MAIN AND EIGHTH STREETS. 
 
 E. P. THOMPSON, PRINTER. 
 1862.
 
 Entered, according to Act of Congress, in the year 1862, 
 BY POE & HITCHCOCK, 
 
 In the Clerk's Office of the District Court of the United States for tho 
 Southern District of Ohio.
 
 OOI^TEI^TS 
 
 PAGE. 
 
 INTRODUCTION 7 
 
 I. 
 PARENTAGE 11 
 
 II. 
 CHILDHOOD 25 
 
 III. 
 
 SEA-LIFE 50 
 
 IV. 
 
 VOYAGE UP THE NORTH SEA 69 
 
 V. 
 
 STORMS AND SHORT ALLOWANCE 80 
 
 VI. 
 SECOND MATE PRIVATEERING 89 
 
 VII. 
 SOLDIER-LIFE 98 
 
 VIII. 
 
 SIEGE OF FORT MEIGS 116 
 
 3
 
 4 CONTENTS. 
 
 IX. 
 
 PAGE. 
 
 THE SEQUEL AT FORT MEIGS 138 
 
 X. 
 
 ENEMY PURSUED DISCHARGED HOME 149 
 
 XI. 
 
 THE CAPTURED BUGLE 165 
 
 XII. 
 
 RELIGIOUS EXPERIENCE LORENZO DOW 170 
 
 XIII. 
 
 CAMP MEETING DAWNING OF LIGHT 180 
 
 XIV. 
 
 NEW ORLEANS FIRST SERMON 188 
 
 XV. 
 
 LAND-OFFICE RECEIVER DIVERS LABORS 197 
 
 XVI. 
 
 LICENSED TO PREACH LIFE IN NEW ORLEANS 207 
 
 XVII. 
 
 LEAVE NEW ORLEANS SCHOOL-TEACHING CAMP 
 MEETING 220 
 
 XVIII. 
 
 SETTLE IN XENIA THE MINISTRY 234 
 
 XIX. 
 
 ITINERANT LIFE COLUMBUS CIRCUIT.... ... 244
 
 CONTENTS. 5 
 
 * 
 
 XX. 
 
 PAGE. 
 
 FIRST CONFERENCE BRUSH CREEK CIRCUIT 264 
 
 XXI. 
 
 
 
 MIAMI AND MAD RIVER CIRCUITS 283 
 
 XXII. 
 
 ZANESVILLE CIRCUIT 299 
 
 XXIII. 
 
 DELAWARE CIRCUIT 305 
 
 XXIV. 
 
 MOUNT VERNON CIRCUIT 319 
 
 XXV. 
 
 UNION AND MADISONVILLE CIRCUITS 329 
 
 XXVI. 
 
 WEST UNION CIRCUIT 340 
 
 XXVII. 
 
 FRANKLINTON AND CIRCLEVILLE CIRCUITS 353 
 
 XXVIII. 
 URBANA STATION 364 
 
 XXIX. 
 
 HAMILTON STATION MONROE CIRCUIT 371 
 
 XXX. 
 
 PUTNAM STATION 380 
 
 XXXI. 
 
 ASBURY CIRCUIT HARMAR STATION.... ... 387
 
 6 CONTENTS. 
 
 t 
 
 XXXII. 
 
 PAOI. 
 
 FULTON STATION GENERAL CONFERENCE 395 
 
 XXXIII. 
 
 BETHEL CAUSE .*. 408 
 
 XXXIV. 
 
 COLLEGE AGENCY MILFORD AND B ATA VI A CIRCUITS... 423 
 
 XXXV. 
 
 MISCELLANEOUS WORK.... ... 441
 
 II^TEODTJOTIOlSr. 
 
 I HAVE frequently been requested by ministerial 
 brethren to write my life; but I felt so unworthy, 
 in the midst of so many pious and useful men 
 around me, that I was contented with my name to 
 be left written on the sandy shore of time, where a 
 few succeeding waves might soon wash it away 
 from the view of mortals. It is comparatively 
 easy to write the life of another. And some 
 authors will, unconscious of wrong, clothe their 
 subjects in almost angelic vestments, so that the 
 youthful reader almost despairs of a faint imita- 
 tion of the character. Perhaps there are few of 
 the illustrious dead who would be willing to 
 indorse their biographies. But for one to write 
 his own life is the tug. Several times, even to 
 the close of my manuscript, I have been tempted 
 
 to throw the whole batch into the fire. Certain it 
 
 7
 
 O INTRODUCTION. 
 
 is, that nothing less than the request of my Con- 
 ference could have induced me to undertake it. 
 
 There is another matter of which we would ad- 
 vise our readers; and that is, our labors were not 
 laid in the pioneer strata amid Indian onslaughts 
 and huntsmen's adventures. Some of our oldest 
 preachers, who have written their autobiographies, 
 have been able to mingle very exciting matters 
 "part of which they saw, and part of which they 
 were." We belong to a class a little subsequent. 
 True, we have labored where thrilling traditions are 
 cherished and recited. But they are traditions; 
 and if they are not infected with accumulation, 
 in descending to the third generation, they have 
 been remarkably preserved from a great family 
 disease. We do not wish to propagate any thing 
 but what we know to be truth. 
 
 We have looked, at the beginning, at the 
 many circuits and stations we have occupied, and 
 we saw that we could not do any thing like 
 justice in giving the Church history of each, with 
 all the thrilling incidents, and private, extraordi- 
 nary conversions; so we were led to take only a 
 general view of each and soon found we had to 
 be more and more sparing in our remarks. And
 
 INTEODUCTION. 9 
 
 this abiding fear of swelling our work beyond all 
 reasonable bounds has restrained our pen through- 
 out. A close-written history of our fields of labor 
 would form of itself a very large volume. 
 
 We have also excluded chapters, with all unnec- 
 essary head-dressing, which can answer, as far as 
 we can see, no end but to make a large volume 
 out of a little matter. Our difficulty is too much 
 matter; and we have, perhaps, lessened the inter- 
 est of the work by withdrawing much of the orig- 
 inal matter from the manuscript. The time has 
 come for our people to distinguish the comparative 
 value of a large book with much waste paper, and 
 a smaller book with one-third more matter. For 
 the same reason we have avoided giving a list of 
 all the appointments on a circuit appointments 
 which have long since been altered or deranged, 
 so that the mere record of their names will leave 
 but little satisfaction to any one. And, although 
 we recollect with lively gratitude many noble men 
 and women who have laid us under lasting obli- 
 gations, which we will remember, world without 
 end yet in a Christian Church, where we have 
 met with so many of this stamp, it would swell 
 our book beyond measure only to pay them a
 
 10 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 passing compliment. It is also true that, among 
 so many and how can it be otherwise? we have 
 met with some of the meanest of the mean. 
 
 We heard brother Finley advise the rowdies at 
 a camp meeting not to meddle with the Meth- 
 odists, on the score of their being non-resistant. 
 "Because," said he, "they have been converted 
 from all classes; and, if the devil should happen 
 to get out of you into them, they will backslide, 
 and half kill you. There is no greater visible 
 devil on earth than a backslidden Methodist." 
 But we have left all these to their own master 
 sincerely praying, the Lord have mercy upon 
 them! Some of these, like pet bears, may be 
 recovered out of the snare of the devil, and stand 
 among God's elect. And the Lord forbid that we 
 should be found reviling them, as we also are but 
 flesh and blood, and need greatly the mercy of 
 the Lord.
 
 THE HELM, THE SWORD, AM) THE CEOSS. 
 
 PAR ENT AOE. 
 
 BIOGEAPHIES generally and we think properly 
 begin with the homestead. My honored father was 
 a descendant of a pious family of the Huguenots, 
 who were so fortunate as to escape from their 
 father-land to England at the revocation of the 
 edict of Nantes. Family tradition runs the geneal- 
 ogy to an honorable length beyond; but we are 
 satisfied in stopping in an atmosphere decidedly 
 pure. Like God's people of old, "they chose 
 rather to suffer affliction with the children of the 
 Lord, than to enjoy the pleasures of sin for a sea- 
 son." In my very childhood I was awed by the 
 solemn and earnest manner in which my father con- 
 ducted family worship. Headers will, no doubt, 
 smile at his son saying he was a man of singular 
 morality, chastity, and integrity. Many years after 
 his death, and when we had removed to Ohio, a 
 Quaker, in passing the home of my mother, caught
 
 12 THE HELM. 
 
 a sight of my father's portrait, and, stopping, he 
 placed his hands on both sides of the door, gazed 
 a few moments on the picture, and excjaimed: 
 " Surely, it is my old friend, Thomas Lorrain ! Is 
 thee his widow?" "I am." "Well, I did all my 
 trading at his store for years; and if there ever 
 was a man of pure uprightness and honesty, thy 
 husband was the man." 
 
 My mother, on the maternal side, was of a 
 Roman Catholic family. Her father adhered to 
 the Church of England. When a child she some- 
 times attended church with her father, and some- 
 times with her mother. So she had the benefit of 
 two ecclesiastical teats; but, according to her own 
 account, found dry nursing at both. She was, 
 however, baptized in the Roman Church. Its 
 splendid ornaments, romantic tales of saints and 
 miracles, and the apparent austerity of its priests, 
 gave her the impression that it was the better Church 
 of the two. Indeed, such was the religious condi- 
 tion of Maryland in that day, it was hard to tell 
 where the ark of God rested. When she was about 
 seven years old, her faith in Roman legends and 
 relics was shaken to its foundation by the following 
 circumstance : She had two maiden aunts who were 
 extremely devout, in their way. They wore, sus- 
 pended from their necks, amulets, which, they told 
 her, contained pieces of the coat which the Savior 
 had worn previous to his crucifixion. She felt a 
 dread veneration for those precious relics, and
 
 PAEENTAGE. 13 
 
 longed for a closer inspection. Her aunts, being 
 invited to a party on a certain occasion, carelessly 
 left their religious charms on their toilet. My 
 mother, seizing on this as her only opportunity, 
 conveyed them up into a garret, and, ripping open 
 one, found a piece of fine broadcloth, apparently 
 new, and of modern texture. But her curiosity 
 stopped not here. She opened the other cushion, 
 and found a piece of like quality, but of a very dif- 
 ferent color. She had relied too confidently on her 
 skill with the needle, and the culprit was arraigned. 
 She acknowledged the outrage, but made a severe 
 attack on their blind superstition and credulity, 
 and the ladies looked at each other as if con- 
 founded. 
 
 "When she was about nine years of age, she road 
 in her Testament, "Ye shall be hated of all men 
 for my sake;" and, "Blessed are ye when men shall 
 revile you, and speak all manner of evil of you," 
 etc. These words were addressed to Christ's disci- 
 ples; and the question here arose, Has he any 
 disciples now in the world? Surely not in Mary- 
 land. The Eoman Catholics are generally rich, and 
 highly honored by their dependents and the poor 
 around; and the Church of England is not less 
 honored. Her conclusion was, if there were any 
 true Christians about, she had not seen or heard 
 of them. But by and by an alarm was sounded 
 through the land that the Methodist preachers 
 were coming, spreading most blasphemous doc-
 
 14 THE HELM. 
 
 trines, dividing families, corrupting the young and 
 ignorant, and, under great pretended sanctity, 
 indulging in secret and licentious meetings. The 
 Roman Catholics said they were Antichrist as 
 glad to get rid of the suspicion that had been 
 thrown on their own escutcheon, as John Gilpin's 
 wife's horses were to "miss the lumbering of the 
 wheels." The Quakers were charitable enough to 
 say, "But we hear that they have turned many 
 notorious sinners into good citizens. Who knows 
 but that they may be to us as the Gibeonites were 
 to Israel hewers of wood and drawers of water? 
 And they may draw out of the quarry many rough 
 stones, that may receive a polish that will fit them 
 for the interior and spiritual temple." They are 
 "solves in sheep clothing," said the Churchmen 
 "Lo Here's and Lo There's who will, if possible, 
 deceive God's own elect." But what was their con- 
 sternation when a bomb was dropped in their midst, 
 by the announcement that a Methodist minister 
 would preach to them on a certain day God will- 
 ing ! This was the invariable form of an appoint- 
 ment in those days so that there might ' be no 
 after-claps in case of uncontrollable disappointment; 
 and they learned it of St. James. On the day 
 appointed, my grandmother sallied out alone, as the 
 scout for the whole family. When she returned all 
 were anxious to hear the decision. "Well," said 
 she, in a very pleasant mood, "he was zealous and 
 earnest, and I had no fault to find of him, except
 
 PARENTAGE. 15 
 
 
 
 he ran down all innocent amusements such as 
 dancing, card-playing, etc." My mother could hold 
 in no longer. "The very people of whom the Savior 
 said, 'They should speak all manner of evil 
 falsely!'" My mother was permitted to attend the 
 next appointment. A plain and solemn man stood 
 up, and took for his text "The day of the Lord is 
 near, it is near, and hasteth greatly, even the 
 voice of the day of the Lord; the mighty man shall 
 cry there bitterly," etc. Every word, look, and mo- 
 tion of the minister deeply impressed her. She said 
 within herself, "This talk is more like the language 
 of the New Testament than any I have ever heard." 
 She was deeply convicted. 
 
 As she returned home, across the field, she heard 
 a voice behind her "Miss Betsey!" It was the 
 voice of a colored man, who lived in the town. 
 "Miss Betsey, did you ever hear a man talk like 
 that man? He used some high words, and I may 
 not have understood him, and I thought you might 
 explain his discourse. I understood him that we 
 must be born over, get new hearts, and that we 
 might know our sins to be forgiven." Here my 
 mother took up the text, and recapitulated the whole 
 sermon, while big tears rolled down the negro's face. 
 Another arrow was driven home the exhortation 
 of our Savior fulfilled "Let him that heareth say 
 come." The carrying out this was a great auxiliary 
 to the ministry in that day. Preachers were few, 
 and could not half supply the country. People
 
 16 THE HELM. 
 
 
 
 would come to town or market, hear a Methodist 
 preach, get under great concern, and when they 
 returned home, as soon as it was known that they 
 had heard a real Methodist, many would come and 
 say, "Do tell us about their doctrine." "Their doc- 
 trine is the doctrine of the Bible. The man said 
 we were all sinners; that we might often promise 
 to do better in our own strength; but all our prom- 
 ises and solemn vows were like ropes of sand no 
 sooner made than broken." "That is certainly true. 
 No man of common-sense will say that he is not a 
 sinner. Well, what then?" 
 
 "He said that 'the soul that sinneth, it shall die. 
 If we die in our sins, hell will be our portion for- 
 ever and ever.' He was no ways mealy-mouthed." 
 "That seems reasonable; but how can we help it?" 
 " He added God had compassion on us, and gave 
 up his Son to die for us, and to lay a broad platform 
 of mercy on which he may be just, honor his law, 
 and pardon penitent sinners, who believe. If we be- 
 lieve heartily and sincerely God will forgive us our 
 sins, and give us an evidence of our acceptance. And 
 this, by the grace of God, is what I am seeking for." 
 "But how do you intend to seek for this faith?" 
 "The preacher said, in the use of the means of 
 grace reading the Word of God, occasional fasting, 
 watching over our hearts, and against our spiritual 
 enemies, earnest prayer; then as God gives us grace, 
 ceasing to do evil, and learning to do well." 
 
 "The Lord knows it is high time for us all to be
 
 PAHENTAGE. 17 
 
 doing better. Will you not hold prayer meetings in 
 your house, and take some lead in this matter?" 
 
 "Yes, if there are any among you who fear God, 
 and are determined to flee the wrath to come, and 
 will join me in prayer, we will have meetings, and 
 if the Lord bless us, we will try to get a preacher 
 to help us." This was the way that the work 
 enlarged. Those who heard said, "Come." And 
 great was the number of believers that was raised 
 up in Maryland. My mother did not join the 
 Church at that time, but she had gained much. 
 The Eoman errors which had been so deeply im- 
 pressed on her tender childhood were obliterated. 
 She learned that the kingdom of God was not meat 
 or drink, but righteousness, peace, and joy in the 
 Holy Ghost; and that God had still a people on 
 earth. She studied the Word of God, attended the 
 means of grace, and prayed much; and for two or 
 three years endured almost continuous conviction. 
 
 Before she had passed her teens she yielded, and 
 joined the Church, with a fixed purpose to use all 
 her ordained and prudential means of grace in seek- 
 ing full salvation. She retired to an upper room, 
 and spent nearly two days in transforming her fash- 
 ionable wardrobe, and in prayer. In this she was 
 opposed by those whom she loved most tenderly. But 
 her heart was fixed. We have often heard her say 
 since, that without calling into question the religion 
 of others, this with her was a necessity. The Spirit 
 
 of God so clearly wrote this duty on her truly- 
 
 2
 
 18 THE HELM. 
 
 awakened heart that non-compliance would have 
 been nothing else but obstinate rebellion. The 
 magnitude of the cross which she lifted can scarcely 
 be conceived of by the young members of the 
 Church in this day. It was an irreligious day. 
 Her relatives and associates moved in the highest 
 circle of Annapolis. Dancing, card-playing, and 
 fashionable parties were all considered very innocent 
 amusements. Extravagance of dress had no moral 
 boundaries. On the other hand, the Methodist 
 usages, in regard to external bearing, might have 
 been like the negro's tree so perpendicular that it 
 leaned a "leetle the other way" with this advant- 
 age, it was on virtue's side. Behold her, then, pass- 
 ing through their shining ranks arrayed in what 
 we now call Quaker plainness, and instead of a high 
 head-dress, and powdered hair, over an enormous 
 cushion, a simple cap, unruffled and unadorned. 
 Jewelry was out of the question. While playing 
 the last game at cards which she ever played, a 
 splendid finger-ring, without any known natural 
 cause, snapped and flew on the table. Yet old men 
 have told us that this novel plainness had peculiar 
 attractions; and that a great trouble with the 
 Church was to prevent irreligious young men run- 
 ning off their girls into unequal matrimony. It is 
 an underground sentiment in the bosom of every 
 sensible man, that 
 
 " Loveliness 
 
 Needs not the foreign aid of ornament, 
 But is when unadorned adorned the most."
 
 PARENTAGE. 19 
 
 Otherwise I could not have claimed a father of un- 
 usual intelligence and classical polish. 
 
 My mother was particularly opposed by her step- 
 father. More than once he threatened to close his 
 door upon her if she attended the Methodist meet- 
 ings. But undismayed she attended to every duty. 
 After her marriage, when lying upon his death-bed 
 full of penitence and contrition, he desired prayer. 
 When asked who should be sent for, he answered, 
 "Send for Betsey and her husband. If God has 
 any true children on earth, they are. They are 
 tried, faithful, and chosen." And she had the holy 
 triumph of seeing her greatest opposer buried in 
 hope of eternal life. All her oppositions would have 
 been lighter if she had only enjoyed an evidence of 
 her acceptance. This she earnestly sought; and one 
 day, while much engaged in her retirement, she 
 received an overwhelming manifestation of the 
 power of Grod, and entered into the enjoyment of a 
 spiritual life. We have been thus particular in 
 merely extracting from her written experience, 
 because her case was similar to hundreds of the 
 children of the ancient Catholic families of Mary- 
 land, who found a rest in the Methodist Church 
 that blessed asylum for all who are oppressed of the 
 devil. My converted mother was the little leaven 
 that leavened nearly the whole family. 
 
 This pious young lady was subsequently my 
 mother. She raised four enterprising sons, and four 
 lovely daughters. In the last years of her widow-
 
 20 THE HELM, 
 
 hood she was with me in my itinerant movements, 
 and counseled me, and prayed for me. She died in 
 great peace in the parsonage on Madison ville circuit. 
 When near her end I endeavored to console her 
 with the idea of her speedy reunion with her 
 mother, whom she had loved with deathless affec- 
 tion. She looked up with great astonishment, and 
 said, "Why, my son, what straitened views you 
 have of the coming glory! True, I shall see my 
 mother and all my pious friends deceased; but 0, I 
 shall see much more than this I shall see my 
 beloved Savior, who died upon the cross for me. 
 Alfred, my son, Alfred, 
 
 'Preach HIM to all, and cry in death, 
 Behold, behold the Lamb !' " 
 
 I have never heard that line read or sung since 
 without a peculiar touch. And the idea of Jesus 
 being the all-absorbing view of the dying saint has 
 ever since been deeply sunken in my theology. 
 Brother Barrett, of precious memory, once gave me 
 a beautiful illustration of this doctrine in the rela- 
 tion of a dream which he once had. 
 
 "Brother," said he^ "if you can have patience to 
 hear the recital, I will relate a dream which I had 
 many years since^ Indeed, I have always been at 
 a loss what to call it whether a dream, vision, or 
 trance for it was certainly distinct from all my 
 mental exercises, before or since, sleeping or awake. 
 In the morning of my ministry, my mind was
 
 PARENTAGE. 21 
 
 greatly harassed in regard to the Divine call, as 
 is quite common, you know, with preachers. Hav- 
 ing gone through with a string of discouraging ap- 
 pointments, without perceiving any immediate fruit, 
 and being greatly depressed with the most hum- 
 bling views of my own inefficiency, I concluded to 
 wind up my traveling career, at least, and retire. 
 I had, however, an evening appointment at a pri- 
 vate house, where I had not yet been, and concluded 
 it should be my last. I was late in reaching the 
 place, and commenced the services immediately. 
 When the congregation had retired, I felt so ex- 
 hausted in body and afflicted in mind, that I wished 
 to sleep. The brother pointed me to the room which 
 was prepared for me, and I retired without a candle. 
 As soon as my tired head was laid upon the pillow, 
 it seemed as if the heavy hand of Death was sud- 
 denly laid upon me. I never expect in the final sep- 
 aration of my soul and body by whatever means 
 to experience more physical anguish than was en- 
 dured on that occasion. The whole body of vitality 
 and consciousness appeared to be rapidly withdraw- 
 ing from all my extremities and members, and con- 
 centrating their forces in my breast. Thence they 
 ascended into my throat. One more agonizing 
 spasm and gasp, and my unharnessed spirit was 
 calmly gazing on the pale body which it had left. 
 There seemed to be nothing peculiar in the light 
 that was about me, but matter and things wero 
 as clear and indisputable in my perception as or-
 
 22 THEHELM. 
 
 dinary noonday scenery. The next thing that ar- 
 rested my attention for a moment were certain odd- 
 ities which were peculiar to the room in which 
 I had lodged, and which I had not seen in the 
 evening because of the darkness. Particularly did 
 I notice some grotesque figures which had been 
 drawn on the wall by children, or those who were 
 as inexperienced in the fine arts as they. In the 
 next moment the room with all its furniture watf 
 no more, and my whole mind was riveted on a per- 
 son who held a milk-white horse, and who com- 
 manded me to mount and follow. As we started, 
 I looked back, and saw the farm-house with all its 
 appurtenances, nothing altered in any respect, but 
 every thing wore the appearance and impress of re- 
 ality. For several miles we passed through a coun- 
 try of commonplace scenery such as I had been 
 familiar with for several days. 
 
 "The roads were sometimes good, sometimes mid- 
 dling, sometimes very bad; but in their general 
 aspect they got better and better as we advanced. 
 By and by the air became more balmy the land- 
 scape more serenely sweet. Extraordinary prospects 
 were scattered here and there; groves and shrub- 
 bery of unearthly beauty and texture would occa- 
 sionally appear, till at last we seemed to be rang- 
 ing a very paradise on earth. As we ascended a 
 gentle rise, my guide bade me turn to the right. 
 I turned, and beheld a stupendous wall of rich, 
 transparent, and precious stones, indescribably va-
 
 PARENTAGE. 23 
 
 riegated by colors, lights, and shades. And while 
 I gazed, its wide and pearly portals slowly swung 
 with a noiseless welcome, and we entered in. Now 
 the consciousness overwhelmed me that this was not 
 an earthly but a heavenly paradise. I can no more 
 describe the celestial scenery than I can the unut- 
 terable ecstasy that at once possessed my soul. I 
 must give you, brother, the naked narrative. The 
 embellishments lie on the other side of the river. 
 We traveled on a celestial highway, walled with 
 vines, flowers, and deathless verdure, such as I 
 thought Eden never knew, till we came to the 
 head of a spacious, and apparently endless avenue. 
 Far in the distance stood the dazzling throne. 
 Well might a prophetic sojourner on earth say, 
 'high and lifted up, 1 And then the train the 
 millions of holy, happy ones, who flowered all the 
 plain ! The aromatic air, the sweet and mellow 
 music and alleluiahs wafted through all the bright 
 regions on high, I may only mention; conceive you 
 the glory if you can. My soul for once drank it 
 in, in rich and generous draughts. In all this blaze 
 of light my mind particularized some things. The 
 throne seemed to be sustained by seven pedestals 
 of transcendent beauty, receding as they rose one 
 above another, so as to present spacious platforms. 
 These, with the exception of a space in the center, 
 were filled with happy spirits. When nearing this 
 glory, my guide commanded me to dismount and 
 walk. As I put my foot on the first step looking
 
 24 THE HELM. 
 
 to the right, I saw a younger brother who had 
 lately died in the hope of eternal life. As soon 
 as our eyes met, we were locked in each other's 
 arms; and he exclaimed, 'My brother, 0, my 
 brother! and so soon!' Relations and Christian 
 brethren crowded around, and I thought I had 
 scaled the summit-level of all glory, and was ready 
 to ask, 'Can heaven give me more?' but just then 
 I glanced my eyes upward, and saw JESUS ! Brother, 
 relations, all heaven were dropped like so many 
 playthings, and on the upper platform I was pros- 
 trated before my Savior, and Christ was all, and in 
 all." We pursue not the dream beyond its illus- 
 tration, although it gave to the ministry of our 
 brother a new tone. "I believe," said he, "the 
 highest joy of heaven is Jesus Christ." We indorse 
 this, especially as it was the doctrine of the in- 
 spired apostles. St. Paul says, "To be dissolved 
 and to be with Christ is far better" better than 
 all on earth, all in heaven. When St. Stephen was 
 yielding up, he called not father or mother, brother 
 or sister, but "Lord Jesus, receive my spirit!" And 
 I enjoy the continuous hope that my mother is 
 with Christ in paradise. If Christ is the brightest 
 bliss of heaven, how necessary it is that we should 
 be conformed to his likeness here, that we may see 
 him as he is, and love the appearing of the Lord. 
 May the Lord conform me the sinner me to his 
 likeness, that I may enjoy the highest bliss of 
 heaven !
 
 CHILDHOOD. 25 
 
 II. 
 
 CHILDHOOD. 
 
 ONE can not lightly pass over the period of 
 childhood in reviewing his life. An inconsiderable 
 impediment near the fountain may give direction to 
 the sweeping river. Early childhood! Some say 
 this is the happiest part of human life. This, we 
 think, is questionable. There are some things 
 vastly pleasant to our memory in overhauling the 
 events and circumstances of childhood the tender 
 care of our parents, the social circle of the family, 
 the absence of anxious care in regard to our pro- 
 vision and defense, and a thousand nameless com- 
 forts with that state inseparable that will be 
 sacredly imbedded in our memory forever. But 
 we easily dismiss from our minds the trials and 
 afflictions, mental, spiritual, and physical, that fol- 
 lowed us almost from the cradle; the disappointed 
 hopes, and rudely-crushed toys, which gave us 
 keener anguish at the time than the loss of a ship 
 would give a merchant. "We have forgotten the 
 impatience of wholesome restraint, the incessant 
 longing for manhood and liberty, which appeared 
 to be ages distant and, not the least, the drudgery 
 
 of the schools, and study, of which we could not 
 
 3
 
 26 THE HELM. 
 
 comprehend the end "creeping like snails unwill- 
 ingly to school." Still the state of childhood is 
 interesting. The Lord has made it so. It is a 
 doctrine full of grace and comfort to Christian 
 parents, that infancy is a state of justification; and, 
 if death interposes, the child is assuredly taken 
 from the evil to come; for no one can arrive at 
 maturity without being constrained to exclaim, 
 
 " Crosses, in number, measure, weight, 
 Were written, Lord, for me." 
 
 But such is the amazing love with which parental 
 affection twines around the stricken one, that the 
 first outgushings of sorrow overtop all these divine 
 cordials which God administers to us. Indeed, we 
 dare not say that they were intended for applica- 
 tion till the first showers of parental sorrow have 
 sanctified the graves of the little ones. Our Lord 
 is a sympathizing power; and the Gospel does not 
 harden, but abundantly refines, the higher instincts 
 of our nature. It seems to us like a mighty frigate 
 standing down the stream of time, with a weeping 
 world in convoy. When the tide has slackened, and 
 the proper eddy is gained, she throws out her sig- 
 nal to tack, and stem the stream, and through the 
 silver trumpet is heard, "Weep not for your dead 
 as those who have no hope; for if we believe that 
 Jesus died and rose again, even so them also which 
 sleep in Jesus will God bring with him." 
 
 A lady, an intimate acquaintance of my mother, 
 had a little daughter that she almost idolized. She
 
 CHILDHOOD. 27 
 
 was suddenly taken away, and the mother became 
 inconsolable. She refused all nourishment, and com- 
 fort, and her friends feared she would be destroyed 
 with overmuch sorrow. One night she fell asleep, 
 and thought an angelic messenger came to her, and, 
 with a benign smile, said, "Would you see your 
 Martha?" The mother quickly replied, "O, above 
 all things!" He said, "Then follow me." She fol- 
 lowed him through a long passage, till he stopped 
 and touched a spring: a large door flew open the 
 voice of merriment, revelry, and dancing broke 
 upon her ear the room was studded with lamps, 
 chandeliers, and reflectors. The conductor pointing 
 to a tall, fashionable young lady, with a face flushed 
 with dissipation, and who seemed to be the idol 
 and leader of the giddy throng, he said, "Behold 
 thy Martha!" "0, no!" cried out the impassioned 
 mother, " she never could have been that tawdry, 
 sporting thing. I was bringing her up in the fear 
 of the Lord, and training her up for heaven." "So 
 you thought," said the mysterious stranger; "but 
 every day she was gaining on your fondness, and 
 you would have got blinder and blinder to her true 
 interests, and you would have denied her nothing; 
 and that would have been the result. But follow 
 me." Presently he touched another spring, and 
 wide and massive doors flew open, and all heaven 
 was exposed to the enraptured mother. She heard 
 the voice of harpers harping with their harps; she 
 saw the white- vested elders around the throne; and
 
 28 THE HELM. 
 
 far within the interior glory stood a blithe and 
 agile form, crowned with glory, and with a harp in 
 hand, joining in the new song. The conductor said, 
 " Behold thy Martha as she is !" The mother 
 echoed back the celestial shout the joy was more 
 than earth could bear the bed shook, the curtains 
 trembled the saint awoke in midnight darkness, 
 exclaiming, "Thy will be done, God, on earth as 
 in heaven! Yes," said she, "'taken from the evil 
 to come.' " This she had often read. This had 
 lately been breathed into her ears by sympathizing 
 friends. But now she realized God's truth, and the 
 truth set her free. When faith lays hold on the 
 Lord's promise, it is a tower of strength. She 
 arose next morning, washed her face, combed her 
 hair, and went forth, with a smiling countenance, 
 to help to fill up the measure of Christ's sufferings 
 left behind. 
 
 One of the heaviest blows my mother received 
 was the death of her little daughter, Caroline. 
 Indeed, the whole family staggered under the 
 shock. She was a lovely child. The neighbors 
 around held her to be a perfect sample of human 
 beauty. She was very young, and I can not believe 
 she had passed the line of infant justification yet 
 her end seemed to be a triumph. The disease was 
 too rapid to reduce her; her eyes assumed an unu- 
 sual luster, the fever tinged her cheek with a higher 
 flush and a little before her death she awoke out 
 of a sleep, and said to her mother with a happy
 
 CHILDHOOD. 29 
 
 smile, and her peculiar dimples fluttering as she 
 spoke, "0, ma! I have seen such pretty things 
 prettier than I have ever seen ! 0, how fine ! It 
 made me feel so good!" "Well, my daughter, tell 
 your mother about those pretty things." "No, no, 
 ma, you must not know them; they would make 
 you so sorry." "Why, child, how can any thing 
 that is so pretty, and makes you so happy, make 
 your mother sorry?" "Yes, you would cry you 
 would cry yourself almost to death." All the elo- 
 quence of my mother and that was not small 
 could not draw the secret from her; and she would 
 still advert to it, with smiles, till her happy spirit 
 passed away. All were under the impression that 
 the things which made her so happy were closely 
 connected with her death, and she knew that would 
 almost break her mother's heart. 
 
 Perhaps one may say, "What childish things to 
 go into an autobiography !" True, they are child- 
 ish; but remember, reader, that one-tenth of a 
 man's life is childhood. And then remember that 
 they can not find a place in a mere biography, 
 because the author knows them not, And then 
 only have patience, and we will begin to grow 
 some. We were writing of infant justification. 
 But those who live have to doff those bandages of 
 Divine mercy, and enter into the world. 
 
 We have thought that personal sin, or conscious- 
 ness of guilt, arises out of a collision of Divine light 
 and human depravity. The child is a sinner by
 
 30 THE HELM. 
 
 nature, indulges in passions and tempers that arc 
 sinful, but he is unconscious of the wrong. When 
 light shines into the soul, so as to distinguish good 
 from evil, the individual detects himself in evil 
 practices flowing from his depraved nature; his 
 heart condemns him, and God, who is greater than 
 his heart, also condemns him. He is a sinner in an 
 incipient degree at least. 
 
 At what period this change of relation takes 
 place, who can tell ? Sooner in some, perhaps, than 
 in others; and sooner in all than men are willing, 
 in general, to admit. We so judge, governed by 
 our own experience. As far as my memory extends 
 back, I recognized myself as a sinner. I can just 
 remember that, when a disease was raging through 
 the country, sweeping off scores of children, it 
 struck me with great violence. Great were my 
 convictions. My mother had carried me much to 
 meetings. The ministers in that day were very 
 plain in describing the morning of the resurrection, 
 and the judgment-day; and I was conscious of my 
 sins. I feared God, feared the grave, feared what 
 would follow. Ardent desires rose from my heart 
 call them prayers. All at once a sacred calm, a 
 sweet tranquillity pervaded my mind. The fears of 
 death, hell, and the grave vanished. I could think 
 with calmness on the closing scene. I believe, if I 
 had died then, I should have gone to heaven not 
 in virtue of infant justification, but as a sinner 
 saved by grace. While I was lying in this condi-
 
 CHILDHOOD. 31 
 
 tion, my parents were preparing to move to a resi- 
 dence in the suburbs. That day they had taken a 
 hasty dinner in the room where I lay. Having 
 been forbidden strong food for some time, the flavor 
 of fried ham came flowing delightfully on my sense, 
 and when they withdrew from the room I cau- 
 tiously tottered to the table, and, seizing the largest 
 slice in the dish, retreated to my bed, pulled the 
 cover over my head, and feasted at my leisure. 
 While eating, I felt the glow of returning health 
 shooting to the very ends of my toes and fingers. 
 Then I thought I would live, and not die. That 
 evening I was carried to our new home. When I 
 awoke in the morning the bright sun was shining, 
 a multitude of birds singing in the trees around, 
 and the brightness of my own mind was in unison 
 with the loveliness of the scenery without. This 
 happy frame I did not long retain. 
 
 Although ever wandering, yet there was a large 
 development of veneration within me. The elder 
 children brother and sister seemed to recognize 
 this, and were willing to clothe me with ministerial 
 honor. They would sometimes put to me very 
 knotty questions in theology. At one time they 
 said, "We have been talking religion, and we have 
 been in a puzzle. You know God made man out 
 of the dust of the earth; but we want to find out 
 who made the Lord. What do you think, Alfred?" 
 Drawing myself up to my utmost dignity : " Yes, 
 God made man out of the dust; and you may easily
 
 32 THE HELM. 
 
 see that, before he did that, he lay down, and rolled 
 in the same dust, and made hisself." This brought 
 out a screaming laugh, which offended me, for I 
 could see no point to their merriment. This theory 
 was as clear to my mind as my own creation. At 
 another time they got into the habit of holding 
 meetings. And, as the congregation was small, 
 they determined to take a pet cat into the society; 
 but, in order to do this, they must needs have her 
 baptized. Again I was invested with power. "We 
 marched down to the branch, they teaching me a 
 short formula. With all solemnity I took puss by 
 the neck, and held her over the water, and said, "I 
 baptize thee " But the cat had other views; a 
 dangerous scuffle ensued, and it is hardly necessary 
 to say she gained the victory, threw up her bristles, 
 straightened her tail, and rushed away as if horri- 
 fied at our profane proceedings. This might have 
 been locked up in the cabinet of childhood-secrecy, 
 but a young man who attended in the store, unseen 
 by us, had witnessed the whole ceremony; and we 
 had to bear the expense for years following. 
 
 On one occasion I thought I would take a step or 
 two beyond the narrow line which had been pre- 
 scribed. There was living in our town a young law- 
 yer, who, notwithstanding he was so crippled that 
 he had to walk with crutches, was a great repro- 
 bate most profane and vulgar. His wickedness 
 was spoken of in all companies, and therefore I 
 hated him. One day I was standing in our back
 
 CHILDHOOD. 33 
 
 porch and saw him hobbling up the steps of the ad- 
 joining tenement. I looked down upon him and 
 cursed him as a wicked cripple. In the same 
 moment I felt myself clasped as in a vise. It was 
 my father, who, unknown to me, was standing 
 behind. He took me into the counting-room, and 
 drawing out a fresh cowhide, it seemed to me that 
 he would not stop till he had cut my legs off. It 
 might seem incredible to some, while I add, that 
 although a wicked sailor for several years, and 
 afterward a wild soldier for twelve months, I have 
 never cursed or swore, except lawfully, since that 
 eventful day. I thought what an awful sin it must 
 be to compel my father to punish me so. I never 
 knew him to strike a servant with a cowhide; but 
 he loved his son better than his servants. If my 
 father had smiled at my smartness, and told it to 
 every visitor, I would have, doubtless, gone on for 
 quantity. He was as serious as the grave. I would 
 not put him past smiling, when he made the report 
 to my mother, if it was only at the crankness of my 
 anathema. I believe in Solomon's blisters for chil- 
 dren, in cases of necessity. On every Sabbath my 
 mother gathered all the young ones together white, 
 yellow, and black and catechised them thoroughly. 
 We did not enjoy the advantages of the Sabbath 
 school in that day. In the course of my ministry 
 I have cherished that institution with peculiar care. 
 But here let me say, if our Sunday school is to cost 
 the abandonment of parental instruction, our loss
 
 34 THE HELM. 
 
 will be incalculable. The sweet seasons of maternal 
 ministration have followed me through every turn 
 of life. 
 
 It must not be supposed we were destitute of daily 
 schools. We attended one of the best grammar 
 schools, as they were called, where we gradually were 
 led up through the rudiments of the Latin language. 
 The doctrine was, we might be prepared for college, 
 or if not, it would give us a better understanding 
 of the English. The idea in that day and section 
 was, that there was no arranged system of English 
 grammar above the outlines that were given in some 
 of our spelling-books, and that in letters almost 
 microscopic. In process of time there came a 
 Yankee, who published that he would teach the 
 English in all its branches, and the English gram- 
 mar thoroughly. This attracted many to his school. 
 Our schoolmaster was a Scotch minister, and he 
 taught school, and administered to the Episcopal 
 Church for many years in that place. My boyish 
 view of him was, that he was the most dignified 
 and awful personage in the world. He was strict 
 in morality; but it was not considered inconsistent 
 by the majority of the people for him to attend the 
 balls, and occasionally the theaters. He had a black 
 man named Moses, whose highest ambition was to 
 be a fac-simile of his master. As he had all his 
 cast-off suits, it was not very difficult to toe the 
 line. The parson was a bachelor, and as he did 
 not wish to get up in the morning before the fire
 
 CHILDHOOD. 35 
 
 was made, he let Moses lock him up every night, 
 and take the key to the kitchen, which was in 
 range of the front of the house, and about a 
 hundred yards off. Sometimes Moses indulged in a 
 morning nap. The parson would hoist his window, 
 and put his head out and cry, "Marses! Marses! 
 The devil's in him. God forgive me!" Whenever 
 he got out of temper, or spoke as he thought unad- 
 visedly, he would wind up with the amend, "God 
 forgive me!" He used to keep his head pomatumed 
 and powdered, and the locks on his forehead and 
 temples rolled up in yellow paper all the week. 
 He removed the paper on the Sabbath, and a hand- 
 some roll of hair half surrounded his face. Although 
 he had considerable Scotch brogue, he was the best 
 reader I ever heard. In after years he married. 
 Once when very ill he sent . a written request for 
 the Methodist Church to" pray for him, when some 
 leading members of the Presbyterian Church won- 
 dered why. he had not sent a similar request to 
 them; he said he did not intend to hurt their feel- 
 ings, but the Methodists were nearer of kin, and he 
 had great confidence in their prayers. Under the 
 superintendence of the pious Bishop Moore he be- 
 came more and more pious; lived till he was over 
 ninety years of age; and we trust he is now in 
 heaven. My father, being a classical man himself, 
 intended to give a polished education to his children. 
 My oldest brother was transferred from this school 
 to Washington College, where, in due time, he hon-
 
 36 THE HELM. 
 
 orably graduated. We were following suit, when, 
 as we will presently show, the sun of our family 
 prosperity went down. 
 
 My father moved his family from Maryland while 
 I was an infant, and settled in Petersburg, in Vir- 
 ginia. I loved Petersburg in childhood I love it 
 still. Sweet in my memory are my morning walks 
 on the banks of the meandering Appomattox. I 
 loved to sit on the rocky cliffs, where honeysuckles 
 creep and woodbines flaunt, listening to the mur- 
 murings of the falls music that might lull to sleep, 
 even the head that wears a crown. I have traveled 
 far and near, on field and flood, but never saw any 
 population so beautiful male and female as the 
 natives of that town, as then impressed on my 
 heart. About the breaking out of the Southern 
 rebellion I read in a paper, that a professed minis- 
 ter of God undertook to rail against the Union in a 
 congregation in that town, when some of the elders 
 retired; this made him more furious, when the con- 
 gregation began to move, and as some passed out, 
 they paused on the threshold, and looking indignantly 
 back, said, "Treason! treason!" I laid the paper 
 down and wept, and thought, " 0, Petersburg ! patri- 
 otic Petersburg, surely it will take an iron cable to 
 drag thee from the Union !" My father was among 
 the first merchants who opened stores wholesale 
 and retail in that town, and many of the country 
 merchants of North Carolina were his customers; 
 his business was fair and flourishing, and we were
 
 CHILDHOOD. 37 
 
 a happy family. We learned by tradition that 
 Petersburg had been a wicked place, but was 
 getting better. 
 
 In my remembrance it had several special attrac- 
 tions. 1. The Spring and Fall races. All respect- 
 able ladies, who were not religious, attended in 
 their chariots, often making a procession about a 
 mile in length; and they engaged in all the jockey- 
 talk and excitement of the turf betting on the 
 black gelding or Wilkin's gray. 2. Periodical balls 
 through the Winter were occasions of great social 
 glee, and considered indispensable to health, al- 
 though some of the old doctors occasionally whis- 
 pered that they cost annually two or three human 
 sacrifices. 3. Gander-pulling and cock-fighting were 
 precious amusements of the gentlemen between 
 meals. 4. Feasting on maple biscuit and wine at 
 funerals. This was a custom that could not be dis- 
 pensed with without drawing down heavy reflections 
 on the mourners. 
 
 The Methodist preacher came along, and he 
 doubtless felt as Paul did when he first came i to 
 Athens. He began with the funerals. After wind- 
 ing up their feelings to extreme tension, he would 
 turn his eyes to the sideboard, and begin to descant 
 on the decanter and cake, showing how inappropri- 
 ate they were to the house of mourning, and he 
 would beg them, if they saw fit to honor him with 
 the solemn duty of preaching over their friends, 
 that they would abandon the revolting practice.
 
 38 THE HELM. 
 
 This sore was soon healed. He was a doctor of the 
 healing, and not of the dissecting practice. 
 
 As for the ball, the race, and other iniquitous 
 frolics, the Methodist preacher, in succession, con- 
 sidered them as anvils on which the drumsticks 
 ecclesiastical might play perpetually. The attend- 
 ance on the races declined annually, till a decent 
 woman could not be found on the ground. The 
 ladies anchored their attractions at home, and their 
 lords were kept to their moorings, and they found 
 it profitable for this life at least. The balls became 
 few and far between, and the gander-pulling sunk 
 into oblivion with a hiss; as for the cock-fighting, 
 it fell into the hands of the negroes. It was not 
 unusual to see a darkey, on Sabbath morn, passing 
 with hasty strides through the streets, with some- 
 thing wrapped up in a striped cotton handkerchief, 
 under his arm. On drawing nigh might be seen 
 two little bright eyes, under a splendid comb, stick- 
 ing out at one end, and shining spurs at the other; 
 and Sambo's face would be illuminated with an 
 arch smile, as much as to say, "You all know it is 
 a rooster, and white folks may come if they will 
 behave." This reformation was accorded to evan- 
 gelical preaching in the pulpit, and right-living in 
 the Church, imperceptibly and gradually affecting 
 public opinion. 
 
 We can hardly hope that that community, during 
 the last forty years, have gone on to perfection. 
 Though our ministers preach the system of salva-
 
 CHILDHOOD. 39 
 
 tion in this day as clear as it was dispensed in the 
 apostolic age, as we suppose, yet they do not keep 
 up an unremitting fire on the devil and all his 
 works, as they once did; nor is the discipline 
 administered as scrupulously. We are not croak- 
 ing. We know that circumstances have materially 
 changed. The enemy's batteries are closer masked, 
 and his bullets are sugar-coated. In the progress 
 of things fairs have been gotten up with the pro- 
 fessed, and may be sincere, purpose of improving 
 agriculture, etc. Many good men have attended 
 them for laudable purposes. Before they get back 
 they see what they did not go to see- races as 
 genuine as those which once cost professors their 
 membership. They hear African ditties and conju- 
 mingoes sung by feigned and not very much 
 feigned negroes ; and sometimes they witness a stag- 
 dance, and make their bow to the big woman of 
 Ohio. But many are falling off by the force of com- 
 mon-sense. They find, as it regards the inventions 
 and machinery exhibited at the fair, their intrinsic 
 merit is their highest premium, because it will in- 
 troduce them to the factory or farm, where we may 
 see their applications in all their practical excel- 
 lency. As for the trained horses and fat cattle, it 
 has been well discovered that the farms if they 
 have any of those who have carried the prizes, 
 present a dreary prospect at home as dreary as 
 the vision of Pharaoh, only reversed. In his dream 
 the seven lean kine devoured the seven fat ones; in
 
 40 THE HELM. 
 
 the last case one fat calf eats up the whole planta- 
 tion, and the owner is something leaner, notwith- 
 standing the premium. The forced vegetables are 
 almost poisonous, and a horse, who possesses more 
 sense than we do the discernment of invisibili- 
 ties would snort over them. So the inhabitants 
 of a great city drank delicious draughts at their 
 hydrants, and smacked their lips, for years; but 
 when they overhauled their reservoir, they found it 
 full of corruption and dead men's bones. 
 
 It is necessary to this work that its readers 
 should see my early surroundings. My home was 
 in the heart of slavery; and this, I suppose, has 
 given me a tender feeling for the African race; 
 and this feeling abides with those in the free States 
 who have been raised in the South. The African 
 knows this, and when he comes among us to raise 
 money to buy a wife or child, he knows where to 
 go. This can not be otherwise. Parents in the 
 South can not lay their fences so high as to sep- 
 arate entirely the children of the two classes. We 
 went chincapin hunting together, fishing together, 
 in some branch which was dry for one-half of the 
 year, and if we got three or four nibbles, we would 
 fish till sundown. When we got tired at noon, we 
 would lie down on the bank, packed away like a 
 layer of herrings. It is no wonder we caught their 
 brogue. In after years, while I was preaching a 
 funeral discourse, a strange minister who had been 
 raised in Kentucky, came to the door, and on ac-
 
 C.HILDHOOD. 41 
 
 count of the press, stood without where he could 
 not see me. He told me afterward that he had 
 heard only a few sentences, when he said in him- 
 self, "That fellow has cracked many a corn-dodger." 
 But now let me say, that there was very little said 
 about the institution, especially before children; yet, 
 whether it was by intuition, or inspiration, or what 
 not, I was, while a white-haired boy, bitterly op- 
 posed to slavery. In the large towns, their condi- 
 tion is comparatively comfortable. The slaves 
 wear, in their turn, the clothes of their owners, and 
 sometimes scarcely soiled. This is often econom- 
 ical, and the masters escape the charge of their 
 garments being motheaten. In a common family, 
 there could be little saved by putting servants under 
 a different regimen; so they eat the same food, 
 tastefully culled, of course, but with this advant- 
 age "The nearer the bone, the sweeter the meat." 
 Dainties are excepted. In some kitchens they oc- 
 casionally live better than they do in the great 
 house, because they sometimes add a 'possum, or 
 fresh fish, or other rarities, that are overlooked by 
 white folks. We used sometimes to have high life 
 below stairs. It was there that I first realized how 
 a drunkard felt, by getting quite boosy on egg- 
 nog, scalding hot. Still, as Sterne says, "Disguise 
 thyself as thou wilt, slavery, still thou art a bit- 
 ter draught!" Even in our town, we had occa- 
 sional exhibitions of its ugliness. While a little 
 
 boy, in passing by a lot that was highly fenced 
 
 4
 
 42 THE HELM. 
 
 with boards, I heard an unusual groaning within. 
 My curiosity led me to hunt a hole, that I might 
 see what was going on within. I saw a negro 
 hoisted up, so that his feet swung clear of the 
 ground, by a rope fastened to his wrists, and pass- 
 ing over a kind of gallows. This was held by a 
 fellow-servant, while a white man was peeling his 
 back with a cowhide. The skin would sometimes 
 be stripped off like ribbons. The tyrant would 
 threaten to lay on in proportion to the noise he 
 made, and continued the cruel chastisement till en- 
 tirely exhausted. He then took down his victim, 
 and by the forced assistance of the other slave, 
 stretched him on the tail of a dray, with his face 
 down, and brought from the kitchen a' tin-cup of 
 melted tallow and poured it on his wounds. This 
 seemed to be the most excruciating part of the 
 whole process. My young bosom was filled with 
 indignation and wrath, supreme. In after years, 
 while reading about Moses, when he saw an Egyp- 
 tian smiting an Israelite, and where it is said, "And 
 he looked this way and that way, and when he saw 
 that there was no man, he slew the Egyptian, and 
 hid him in the sand," I thought I understood how 
 Moses felt. When I saw this act of cruelty, I felt 
 if I could secretly dispose of that scoundrel without 
 exposing myself to the law, I would be doing God 
 an acceptable service. 
 
 But I might mention a case that came much 
 nearer home than this. My father, for about fif-
 
 CHILDHOOD. 43 
 
 teen or twenty years, hired almost a whole family 
 of slaves. They were of sterling integrity, and 
 some of them religious. Aunt Milly, the matron 
 of this colored family, was a dark mulatto, and a 
 very pious Baptist. She had two sons besides her 
 children in our family, who were blacksmiths. One 
 of them came in one day apparently in great an- 
 guish, and told his mother that his wife's master 
 had sold her and the children to a Georgia negro- 
 buyer, and that they would pass in the afternoon 
 by our big gate, which was on the Carolina road. 
 When I heard this I became deeply moved, and re- 
 solved in my mind to be there. When I arrived, 
 I found Aunt Milly and her son already there. 
 They looked with painful suspense for some time 
 down the road. Presently the sorrowful band was 
 seen advancing with unwilling tread. Several men 
 were handcuffed two and two. The women and 
 children were -not bound. As they came up, Will 
 and his wife rushed into the last sad embrace. The 
 little children grasped his pantaloons. The grand- 
 mother's eyes flashed like diamonds, from earth to 
 heaven, from heaven to earth. Only two or three 
 ox drops ran down her cheeks it was agony beyond 
 tears. I alone was allowed this luxury, and I al- 
 most doubled myself down to the earth, and wept 
 as if my little heart would burst. Many of our 
 white acquaintances who knew the worth and sensi- 
 bility of that colored family, sympathized with them. 
 The negro-trader checked his horse awhile, and
 
 44 THE HELM. 
 
 seemed to respect this scene of hopeless sorrow, 
 but after a while drove them on. The wife and 
 children cast many a longing look behind. The 
 husband stood like a marble monument of woe, till 
 a turn in the road separated husband and wife, 
 parent and children forever. Many of our citizens 
 used to feel deeply on such occasions, but they 
 seemed to consider them as necessary outrages con- 
 nected with an institution that appeared to be as 
 firmly settled as the pillars of heaven. 
 
 We never felt a sense of comfortable security 
 while living in that beautiful town. Sometimes re- 
 ports of intended insurrections would send a thrill 
 of fear through every family. One time a boy came 
 up where we were playing near the school, with 
 dismayed visage, and said, "Boys, as I was coming 
 to school, a negro looked at me and said, 'Ah, my 
 lad, you look white and rosy now, but in a few 
 days your face will be as black as my hand.' " 
 Then we gathered up our playthings, and entering 
 into serious squads, began to rehearse all the latest 
 symptoms of an outbreak that we could drum up 
 in our memory. When the school broke the intel- 
 ligence was carried to every home. 
 
 Sometimes reports would be spread which would 
 be found utterly false. Still they would create un- 
 easiness for the time being. The most formidable 
 disturbance which we ever had was the meditated 
 insurrection of Gabriel General Gabriel, as some 
 called him by way of derision. The plan was to
 
 CHILDHOOD. 46 
 
 commence at Richmond, in the most sleepy watch 
 of the night; but there was to be a general uprising 
 through the country. They were to station two 
 men at the door of every house, fire the city in two 
 places, and then raise the all-exciting cry "fire! 
 fire!" As the citizens would rush out with their 
 fire-buckets, as they usually did in such alarms, 
 they were to cut them down. Richmond taken, 
 and being supplied with more effective arms, they 
 were to spread their devastations throughout the 
 State. It was said that they intended to destroy 
 'also the colored women, and to supply their place 
 with white ladies. The leaders, in order to forestall 
 any subsequent misunderstanding, had agreed on 
 their future partners, chosen from among the most 
 celebrated beauties of the land. Scythe-blades and 
 reap-hooks were secretly converted into war instru- 
 ments, and the blacksmiths in the country, who 
 generally worked late in the night, had made a 
 considerable number of pikes, which could in a few 
 moments be attached to staffs. 
 
 The secret was faithfully kept till the very eve 
 of its intended accomplishment. There was a gen- 
 tleman in the country, residing alone on his planta- 
 tion. He had a boy who had been raised as a pet 
 negro. This boy came into his chamber, and roused 
 him up from his sleep. "Master! master!" said he, 
 "I have brought your horse out, and fastened him 
 to the gate. Arise and fly for your life!" 
 
 "Why? what's the matter?"
 
 46 THE HELM. 
 
 "The negroes have been meeting several nights 
 at their quarters. I have hung around, listening 
 till I have found out that they intend this night to 
 march to Richmond, and kill all the white people. 
 Fly for your life, master!" 
 
 He soon sprang on his horse, and fled. About 
 this time a dismal cloud covered the heavens, send- 
 ing forth almost incessant lightning. As he rode 
 down the lane, by the bright flashes above he could 
 see the negroes, in almost every field, converging 
 toward the quarters. He arrived at the city, 
 aroused up the authorities, and immediately the 
 military were turned out, and the city under arms. 
 The insurgents had not yet congregated, for they 
 were waiting forces from the country; but squads 
 of insurrectionists were arrested, and the pro- 
 gramme fully exposed. In the mean time, the storm 
 that had been threatening so long fell with awful 
 devastation on the earth. Instead of raining it 
 poured in mighty floods. In Petersburg, twenty- 
 five miles off, the storm leveled or broke off nearly 
 all the shade-trees; an arch which ran under Bol- 
 ingbrooke-street, which was high enough for a man 
 to stand under, was insufficient to carry off the 
 flood, and it burst across the street. We supposed 
 every family was up, for every house was lighted. 
 I remember my father said, "Betsey, God is in 
 this storm, as horrible as it is it is supernatural. 
 Mark me! this storm is salvation." So it was, and 
 so I have ever believed. God had mercy on white
 
 CHILDHOOD. 47 
 
 and black. If the insurrection had commenced 
 there might have been a great slaughter of the 
 whites, but it would have resulted in an awful 
 destruction of the blacks; for the other States would 
 have sent their desolating forces upon them. The 
 country negroes were bending their way to the city 
 when the storm broke loose, but they found every 
 branch with their bottoms overflowed. Here some 
 said, "You can see plainly the hand of God is 
 against us." Others charged them with cowardice, 
 and after having a general "knock down and drag 
 out," it was every man to his cabin. For several 
 days the gallows in Richmond was in constant serv- 
 ice, till the most humane said it is enough stay 
 your hands. Solomon, the brother of Gabriel, while 
 standing under the gallows, looked around on the 
 multitude, and defiantly said, " Well, you may hang 
 Solomon, but let me tell you there are more Solo- 
 mons in Old ' Firginia.'" 
 
 Gabriel could not be found; but a high reward 
 was offered for him. It seems he had boarded one 
 of the river crafts commanded by a colored man, 
 and fled to Norfolk, with an intention to put to sea 
 as soon as arrangements could be made. The vessel 
 lay at the wharf. After being confined some days 
 to his contracted berth, he thought he would, in 
 the twilight hour, put his head up the companion- 
 way, and breathe for a while a purer air. A little 
 black boy, who had been acquainted with him in 
 Richmond, in the innocence of his heart exclaimed:
 
 48 T H E H E L M . 
 
 "How-dy, Uncle Gabriel? when did you leave Rich- 
 mond?" Fatal salutation! Some white men, who 
 were standing by, rushed on board and seized him. 
 His baggage was overhauled. He had a fine suit 
 of uniform, splendid epaulets, and a costly sword. 
 He was carried to Richmond, and thrown into 
 prison. Some gentlemen, moved by curiosity, be- 
 gan to catechise him, but drawing himself up with 
 a magisterial air, he said, "I will answer no imper- 
 tinent questions, but will answer at the bar of my 
 country." Every thing that might be made harm- 
 ful was taken from his cell, but he found a large, 
 rusty, crooked nail. This he swallowed with an 
 intention of avoiding the gallows, but it became 
 immovably fixed in his throat, and in this condition 
 he was hanged. Years after this I heard an old 
 negro playing on a bandore a lengthy song descrip- 
 tive of the raid of General Gabriel. On a slight 
 hearing, it seemed to be a burlesque on the defeat; 
 but there were some sentiments in pensive air that 
 drew tears from the African eye. No foot of power 
 can crush national songs even if they are African. 
 Many a time, while a boy, I have stopped to hear 
 the darkies, while working on the roads, sing 
 
 " Billy Gilliam kill a nigger ; 
 
 0, boys ! ye 'most done ? 
 He knock him down, and den he stomp him ; 
 
 0, boys! ye 'most done? 
 He drag him down to Sandy Bottom ; 
 
 0, boys! ye 'most done? 
 And den he swear he never toch him ; 
 
 0, boya ! ye 'most done ?"
 
 CHILDHOOD. 49 
 
 The relations of Billy Gilliam often had to drive 
 their chariots under such serenading, and look as 
 pleasant as they could. 
 
 5
 
 50 THEHELM. 
 
 III. 
 
 SEA-LIFE. 
 
 MY father, having dissolved partnership with a 
 firm in Philadelphia, was advised by some of his 
 best friends to form a connection with two French 
 gentlemen, who were in a large grocery business. 
 These gentlemen were brothers, and were as dis- 
 tinct in their characters as any two men could be. 
 Alexander, the elder, was very plain, and of an 
 unusually-serious cast. He had emigrated with his 
 father to the western wilds ; and one morning, when 
 he was seated at the breakfast-table, an Indian 
 chief stepped behind his father, and drove a toma- 
 hawk into his skull. Alexander fled, and with 
 much difficulty made his escape; but it was said 
 he never smiled again. Francis had been brought 
 up in the fashions and amusements of France. He 
 was light and frivolous, a dandy who ran into the 
 most ridiculous extreme of fashion. The business 
 of the house was very promising. They sent a 
 valuable cargo to France, and were looking for 
 a rich return of merchandise. Francis was sent 
 out as supercargo, and was charged to insure the 
 goods. This he did not do giving, afterward, the 
 simple apology, that, as he was coming back in the
 
 SEA-LIFE. 51 
 
 ship, he thought if the ship was lost he would be 
 lost, and all would go together. This, however, 
 was not the case. The ship Neptune, returning, as 
 it was said, with the richest cargo which had left 
 that season, sprung a bad leak. With all hands 
 employed at the pumps it still gained on them. 
 When all hope had nearly fled, a sail hove in sight, 
 but cruelly passed, and left her with all her signals 
 of distress flying. Now they sank down in despair; 
 the Protestants broke out in prayer, the Roman 
 Catholic ladies began to count their beads, kiss 
 their crosses, and to call on the blessed Mary. 
 There were many passengers. Just then another 
 sail appeared; hope revived; the pumps were again 
 manned. Those who came to the rescue had barely 
 time to transfer the crew and passengers, without 
 baggage, when the old Neptune went down. I well 
 remember the announcement of this misfortune to 
 my mother. Late one afternoon, Aunt Milly, whom 
 we have already introduced as the matron of the 
 kitchen, stood in the door, with shawl and bonnet 
 on, and said: 
 
 "Mistiss, I thought I would step in and ask you 
 if you had heard any thing about this bad news." 
 
 "What bad news, Milly? 0, do tell me! speak 
 quick ! Is my husband dead?" 
 
 "0 no, mistiss!" 
 
 "What then is my son Edwin?" 
 
 He was from home. 
 
 " no, mistiss, it is nothing like that. I
 
 52 THEHELM. 
 
 thought I would tell you how, as I was coming up 
 from town, I met Mr. Tucker's boy, and he asked 
 me if I had heard of master's bad luck " 
 
 "0, Milly, is he dangerously hurt?" 
 
 "No, ma'am. But he said the ship that was 
 fetching all his goods across the sea is gone to the 
 bottom and it 's printed in the papers." 
 
 "0, Milly! is that all is that all? 0, I am so 
 relieved! I have my husband and my children 
 yet, thank God! Is that all?" 
 
 "Indeed, ma'am, I thought that was enough; 
 the ship and all dem fine goods gone to de bot- 
 tom!" 
 
 In the evening my father approached the house 
 with slow and measured steps. My mother was 
 watching at the door, and with a smiling face said, 
 " Come on ; I have heard all. We are all here. 
 We have resources within ourselves, and God will 
 help us." And she so cheered him up, that he 
 could give a deliberate account of the shipwreck, 
 and all that had transpired. But this was only the 
 beginning of the calamity. The brothers agreed to 
 turn over to him the stock on hand, and an interest 
 which they could command in Norfolk, to the 
 amount of several thousand dollars, if he would 
 take upon him the outstanding credits and debts. 
 He felt he could at least weather the point on such 
 terms. The elder brother left at once the country 
 where he had drank so deeply of sorrow. Francis 
 went down to Norfolk to carry out the contract,
 
 SEA-LIFE. 53 
 
 but was heard of no more. My father buffeted the 
 adverse tide awhile, but finally broke honorably 
 broke giving up all, without mental or pecuniary 
 reservation. Many who were his friends in pros- 
 perity stood by the family to the last. My oldest 
 brother completed his study of the law, under Mr. 
 Wirt; and my decision was the sea, with an inten- 
 tion to become a sea-captain. This was common in 
 that section of the country. There were few fami- 
 lies who had not a representative on the seas. I 
 laid by all other studies, and betook myself to the 
 acquisition of navigation. I soon possessed a good 
 understanding of it theoretically. The gentleman 
 under whom I agreed to sail did not require indent- 
 ures, but said he did not wish to retain me a mo- 
 ment after I might become dissatisfied. It was my 
 intention not to make use of names in this work, 
 unless absolutely necessary. I think it is wrong 
 in an autobiography. Although many with whom 
 my early history is connected are no more, yet they 
 may have relations and connections still living, and 
 they might not wish to see their names bandied 
 about. Capt. C., or rather ex-Capt. C. was my tem- 
 porary master. He had made a fortune on the seas, 
 and now owned the beautiful ship " Sheffield." He 
 had for years ceased to command, and always em- 
 ployed a captain proper to take charge. He would 
 go as supercargo when there was a cargo, and when 
 there was none, a gentleman at large. He was 
 a great beau on land and on sea when ladies
 
 54 THE HELM. 
 
 were about though he was a confirmed bachelor, 
 and tidy but genteel in his dress. The front and 
 top of his head was bald, and slick as a peeled 
 onion. His hair, behind, was made up in a cue 
 about as big as a pig's tail, with an abundance of 
 pomatum and powder, which was daily dressed by 
 black Tom the steward. When I would follow him 
 to the naval store for some article, he*would run 
 me breathless; but when ladies were promenading 
 on either side of the street, I would then gain on 
 him; for he would stop and make a bow an old- 
 time bow. He would take his hat off his head, 
 swing it down by his side, and give a lordly bend 
 for every lady in the group, while his head would 
 shine in the sun like a looking-glass; and then he 
 would go on his way, talking to himself, but never 
 distinctly enough for me to get into his secrets. It 
 was to this man, whom I have described in advance, 
 that I became a nominal apprentice. 
 
 Having rigged myself off, with jacket and trow- 
 sers, I proceeded down to the ship, about twelve 
 miles distant, accompanied by a servant who was 
 to bring the horses back. Arriving at the brink 
 of a high hill overlooking the shipping, I suddenly 
 stopped in amazement. I had never seen such a 
 wide-spread sheet of water as the James Kiver pre- 
 sented at that point. It was a sprinkling and windy 
 day, and the water was considerably ruffled. Here 
 I felt my faith giving way; but then I thought, if 
 you falter at this, what will you do in the swellings
 
 SEA-LIFE. 55 
 
 of the ocean? Ambition came to my aid, and I 
 went on board. The men were glad that a boy 
 had dropped among them, because he would do 
 many small jobs that they were glad to get rid of; 
 so I became a great favorite. 
 
 After we had passed the Capes, I can not de- 
 scribe with what extreme anxiety I watched the 
 dim continent, till the last streak of land disap- 
 peared. The sheep and pigs that had been placed 
 under my province were stowed away in the long- 
 boat, amidships, with the pinnace capsized over 
 them for a shelter, and all strongly lashed. I saw 
 the sheep putting out their heads between the boats, 
 and ranging with their eyes the horizon, as though 
 to catch the sight of one more verdant hill, or 
 flowery valley; and then they would bleat most 
 piteously. My whole mind was at once in partner- 
 ship and sympathy with their sorrow, and I said 
 within myself, "What a strange and unnatural per- 
 version of things!" But I had not much leisure to 
 philosophize, for the sea began to swell more freely, 
 and all at once a strange class of feelings over- 
 whelmed me. A deadly sickness which had no pro- 
 totype aside of blue water, unless it 'be excessive 
 drunkenness, struck me, and I became the merrily 
 observed of all observers. The whole world became 
 topsy-turvy, and an utter carelessness of life and 
 death possessed me. A perpetual retching, with- 
 out a possibility of discharging my stomach, was 
 my enduring torment. An alien from all human
 
 56 THE HELM. 
 
 sympathy, for the whole crew rejoiced, I had to 
 endure as best I could, 
 
 " When my sorrows they saw, and smiled at the tears which I shed !" 
 
 Indeed, they labored to augment my affliction. I 
 saw an old salt peeping round the foremast, and 
 beckoning to me. I hastened to stagger toward 
 him, for it was the only phiz that bore marks of 
 commiseration. "My dear boy," said he, "you need 
 not endure this nasty complaint for five minutes. 
 I know a sovereign remedy." 
 
 "0, tell me what it is, do!" 
 
 "Well, if you will swallow this fat gob of pork, 
 which is tied to this string, I will jerk it right up 
 again, and you will be cured in a moment." The 
 very idea of this operation increased my distress, 
 and multiplied my gagging. When I had suffered 
 a few days, the steward brought up from the cabin 
 a keg which had contained cherry-bounce, and 
 wished me to get the cherries out of the bung- 
 hole, and give them to the pigs. The cherries 
 looked pretty, and I thought I would taste them 
 and see if they were fit for pigs. The first one 
 brought back a little animation to my pallet, and 
 I went on for quantity, till I was fearful of addling 
 the remnant of brains that seemed to be left. Sud- 
 denly my stomach took a free somerset, and I had 
 a profuse liberation. In a few days I was good for 
 full allowance of fat pork and ship biscuit. The 
 captain would not let me be sent aloft during my
 
 SEA-LIFE. 57 
 
 seasickness, and said, "Wait till he gets his sea- 
 legs aboard." But now I was sent up into the 
 maintop. To those who are unacquainted with ships, 
 we will say that the top is a platform of wood 
 which surrounds the head of the mast. The lower 
 shrouds extend from the sides of the vessel, inclin- 
 ing into the head of the lower mast, and with rat- 
 lins like a ladder. When you get there you come 
 to the puttock-shrouds, their lower ends connecting 
 with the lower shrouds close into the mast; they 
 are fastened by their upper ends to the side of the 
 rim of the top, where they are in connection with 
 the topmast shrouds, giving you another slant to 
 the head of the topmast. The intermediate shrouds 
 slant over your head about forty-five degrees, till 
 you surmount the edge of the top and get hold of 
 the topmast shrouds; while climbing them, your 
 whole body hangs nearly horizontal with the deck. 
 When I saw men going up, with their whole body 
 hanging over the deck, I could not conceive how 
 they could keep their feet on the ratlins; and I 
 had many forebodings about my time to come. My 
 time had now come, and I ran up the lower shrouds 
 sailor-like, for I had been celebrated at home for 
 my agility. But when I looked overhead and saw 
 that I would now have to climb the other way for 
 a piece, with my head from the mast, and body 
 hanging over the deck, I trembled. But I saw 
 there was a short cut through the center of the 
 top, where the rigging came down, so wheeled
 
 58 T H E H E L M . 
 
 quickly, and was sliding through the friendly open- 
 ing, when a simultaneous shouting arose from the 
 deck fore and aft, "Ah! you lubber, you lubber, 
 you soldier you! you are gliding through lubber's 
 hole, are you?" I thought I would stop that music 
 forever, if it were at the expense of my life; so I 
 withdrew and ascended up the old way. And hav- 
 ing passed the Rubicon, in a little while could run 
 over the rigging like a squirrel. 
 
 But I had to learn the bend of the sailors as well 
 as the rigging; for I was too trusty and confiding. 
 The captain called me in the cabin to bottle off 
 some Holland gin; and when I was done he pre- 
 sented me with a bottle of the stuff. I was so 
 proud of it that I did not even cover it with my 
 handkerchief, as the worst of drunkards do, but 
 carried it, all sparkling as it was, to the forecastle, 
 winking at the men as I passed, and deposited it in 
 my chest, which I thought was impregnable when 
 it was locked; not understanding at that time 
 that all chest-keys were alike. My calculations 
 about my bottle were very benevolent. I intended, 
 at a proper season, to give a taste to every man 
 before the mast. One chilly night I told the watch 
 on deck, to which I belonged, that I would get out 
 my bottle and treat them all. As I was going for- 
 ward I heard a little tittering behind, but it might 
 be in anticipation of a swig. 
 
 When I brought my bottle up I took a consider- 
 able pull at it myself when, lo, I swallowed a
 
 SEA-LIFE. 59 
 
 draught of salt water! Yes, it was salt, but truth 
 compels me to record it was something more than 
 salt. Here followed an uproarious laugh on deck, 
 and then came back a mighty echo from below; and 
 I felt as if I did not care about owning another 
 bottle of gin while I might live. The scamps had 
 made a general conspiracy against my bottle. 
 
 We have not as great a variety in the scenery at 
 sea as we have in traveling on the land no tow- 
 ering mountains or wide-spread flowery valleys. 
 Incidents are few and far between still we have 
 not a dull uniformity. The scene is considerably 
 varied by the light winds that gently ruffle the 
 glassy surface to the driving tempest which dashes 
 the swelling billows to the skies, till all seems to be 
 mingled in lawless but sublime confusion. Inci- 
 dents seldom occur, but in proportion to their scarc- 
 ity is their all-absorbing interest. When the cry of 
 "Sail, ho!" is heard through the ship, all on board 
 are aroused. When first seen, the stranger appears 
 like a dark speck in the distant horizon presently 
 we raise her lower sails, then her hull; as we near 
 her she comes pitching and rolling, and exposing 
 half of her bottom by fits and starts, like some liv- 
 ing monster of the great deep; and if the breeze is 
 tolerably fresh we hardly have time to exchange the 
 usual compliments "whence came ye? whither are 
 you bound?" when she is gone, and we rush on to 
 our destiny to meet no more. 
 
 The captain seemed much pleased when he found
 
 60 THE HELM. 
 
 I had studied navigation; and as he had a spare 
 quadrant on board, he made me take the sun every 
 day and keep a journal. I would sometimes be 
 greatly annoyed by an antic sailor, who would stand 
 partly concealed by the foremast so that the officers 
 could not see him, while he could be seen by myself; 
 and he would raise the jaw-bone of a hog to his 
 eye, and twist himself about with the motions of 
 the ship, and carry on his mockery, while I would 
 be operating. The sailors did not seem to like it so 
 well when they found I was getting qualified for the 
 cabin. One, who was generally called growler, said, 
 "I expect he will be a bully captain some of these 
 days, and kick and cuff the poor sailors about." 
 And then, instead of looking on me and weeping, as 
 the prophet did before Hazael, he talked himself 
 into a fury, grit his teeth, and clinched his fist, and 
 cursed and swore what he would do with me if he 
 ever fell under my jurisdiction. And so he battled 
 against his man of straw. But I laughed and said, 
 "No, Bill, you are wrong; I am going to be a very 
 good captain to the sailors; I mean to give them 
 their allowance of grog every day, besides splicing 
 the main brace after every storm, and watch and 
 watch, blow high or blow low." And thus I would 
 talk till I got him into a good humor again. 
 
 The generality of landsmen, when they look at the 
 rough exterior of a sea captain, and consider well 
 his defiant carriage, conclude that he has very little 
 of the milk of human kindness in him. So I thought
 
 SEA-LIFE. 61 
 
 at first in regard to mycaptain, because he sometimes 
 made me shin up to the royal mast-head a long, 
 slender pole, beyond all rigging, and well slashed 
 withal to rig pendant halliards. But I made a 
 sudden discovery one day, and found that although 
 his tear-box was shallow, and his benevolence was 
 stowed away deep, and was not to be wasted on 
 every occasion, yet he was kind and feeling. One 
 day I was sent up to send down the top-gallant sail 
 yard. We had topped the yard, and I was standing 
 in the topmast shrouds, directing the yard in its 
 descent, when the ship brought a tremendous lee- 
 lurch and weather-roll, and the yard got loose from 
 me, and, returning with a powerful swing, knocked 
 me out of the shrouds. I caught with one hand on 
 a dubious ratlin, and- my whole body swung to 
 leeward, suspended by the ratlin over the angry 
 billows. The captain on deck turned pale, wrung 
 his hands, and exclaimed in a shrill feminine voice, 
 which he always assumed when in distress, "0, my 
 boy, my boy! my boy is lost, lost!" He was un- 
 usually kind to me for some time after this. He 
 never knew how that outburst of concern riveted 
 me to him forever. My master was an out-and-out 
 epicure. Much of his time was taken up in consid- 
 ering what he would eat and what he would drink. 
 About one o'clock he would be about the caboose 
 inspecting and tasting the dishes. If they pleased 
 him he would smack his lips, and say to the old 
 negro cook, "David, David! I say, David, that's
 
 62 THE HELM. 
 
 nice, David David, you deserve a dram for this, 
 David!" This was David's only dish. I never saw 
 him eat a meal in my life. He seemed to live on 
 the flavor and steam of the caboose; but it was ex- 
 hilarating to see him toss off a dram. The dinner 
 was deferred till two o'clock, that the after-gang 
 might become as ravenous as Polar bears. The 
 captain would then sit for two hours, drinking wine 
 with the passengers, and engaged in sundry talk. 
 He would come upon deck about five o'clock, with 
 a face as round and red as a full moon, take a 
 round or two on the quarter-deck, and then slyly 
 approach the bulwarks, and generously discharge 
 his variegated cargo to the sharks. 
 
 When we made the white cliffs of Old England I 
 was entranced. It was on a clear, sunshining 
 morning; but every thing had to me a diminutive 
 appearance. The farms seemed to be gardens with 
 large beds, the shrub-fences walks. Seeing a 
 house near the shore, it appeared of the size of our 
 dog-house on board. Here I first learned the rela- 
 tion of sight to distance. I said to an old sailor, 
 "What are they doing with so many dog-houses 
 ashore? Look at that little white dog-house on the 
 beach!" 
 
 "Dog-house, indeed! I am acquainted with this 
 part of the coast. That is one of the largest tav- 
 erns on this part of England. How far do you 
 think you are from land?" 
 
 "About a mile or a mile and a half."
 
 SEA-LIFE. 63 
 
 "You barber's clerk, you! we are about eight 
 miles off." 
 
 As soon as I understood the distance every thing 
 appeared right. We are not going to afflict our 
 readers with a regular log-book, but intend to take 
 a running and general view of our sea-life. We 
 made three voyages to London, and became better 
 acquainted with the points and reaches of the 
 Thames than with those of our own James River. 
 
 There is no small perplexity and fun in ascending 
 the last five miles. Here the comers and goers be- 
 came so thick often, that we had to drift up by the 
 force of the tide, with very little sail, and sometimes 
 get locked in with a raft of vessels of all sizes and 
 nations. In that day American ships were highly 
 ornamented- and neat in their rigging. Our ship 
 had a handsome figure-head, and a group of images 
 as large as life reclining around her stern. There 
 was a class of vessels called colliers, commanded by 
 rough North-of-England men, with crews more un- 
 couth and outlandish than themselves. It was one 
 of their peculiar delights to smash a Yankee. They 
 would rush into an American vessel, crying out in 
 their rude brogue, "Take care of your gingerbread 
 works there!" and away would fly an arm or leg 
 from our stern-figures. Onward we would move 
 amid . thumping sides and snapping spars. The 
 crews would sometimes get exasperated, and billets 
 of wood and belaying pins would fly through the 
 air. In the general row, if a negro should put his
 
 64 THE HELM. 
 
 head up a scuttle, a general cry would rise, "Who 
 dat? who dat?" This would be followed by a uni- 
 versal laugh, and the poor darkey would have to 
 dodge back. We labored hard, but without success, 
 to learn the origin of this. One thing is certain, it 
 was not because they had any prejudice against 
 Africans. Their currency in England is undis- 
 puted. It is no uncommon thing, in the atmos- 
 phere of shipping, to see fair ladies locked arm 
 with the Africans, going to church, and their beaux 
 carrying their Morocco prayer-books. Some of our 
 officers got acquainted with a rich tobacconist. 
 When the ship returned to London the young men 
 of the family invited the mates to come and take 
 tea with them, observing that their sister had got 
 married, during their absence, to a Virginia gentle- 
 man. When the officers arrived they were invited 
 into a splendid parlor, and introduced to the brother- 
 in-law a tall, double-jointed negro. 
 
 Sometimes our white men would get into a fight, 
 on shore, with some of the colored cooks and stew- 
 ards. Then the Cockneys would crowd around 
 "Give it to him, my African! Let him have it! 
 You are not in America now. You are in the land 
 of freedom the land of liberty, my boy; plank it 
 into him!" 
 
 One Sabbath I thought I would make the tour 
 of London. I began by hunting a Methodist meet- 
 ing-house,* which could not be found ; but as St. 
 Paul's was looming up over all, thither my steps
 
 SEA-LIFE. 65 
 
 were bent. When close to it I was utterly disap- 
 pointed. True, it was an enormous structure, and 
 of its architecture I was not capable of judging; 
 but standing, as it had done for generations, in the 
 coal-smoke and moisture of London, many parts of 
 it were as black as the back of a chimney. Hav- 
 ing entered under the dome, I was astonished at 
 the magnitude of the work, and the distance trav- 
 eled in examining its monuments. Passing along 
 the gangway that bordered the central space, the 
 strokes of an organ struck my ear. I was bold 
 enough to open, gently, a door, and found myself in 
 an audience, and, from the splendor of their costume, 
 I began to conclude that I had intruded into the 
 nobility, if not into the royal family. I was afraid 
 my sailor-dress would involve me in a dismissal, 
 but they seemed to be so taken up with each other 
 that I was hardly noticed. I observed that as often 
 as the preacher or reader mentioned any of the 
 Divine titles the organ struck. 
 
 Being dismissed from the ecclesiastical glory of 
 England, we you see we have found company 
 continued our explorations toward the court-end of 
 the city, and in two hours got lost as we believed, 
 irrecoverably, lost. If any one gets lost in London, 
 let him ask the first genteel-looking person the 
 way. He will stop, and, looking very wise, will 
 say, "Find it out by your learning, as I did." 
 Then turn next to a plain working-man, whose 
 
 tanned skin appears impervious to mischief, and ask 
 
 6
 
 66 THE HELM. 
 
 him the direction to London bridge; he will say, 
 "With pleasure, sir. Take that street, and go one 
 mile, you will come to an open square, turn to the 
 right and that will lead you right down to the 
 bridge" This will put you two miles more out of 
 the way. The Cockneys take sovereign pleasure in 
 putting strangers out of the way, and laying a 
 stumbling-block in the way of the blind. Happy 
 are the lost if they meet an American sailor, even 
 if he is two sheets in the wind, and the third shiv- 
 ering, he will put you in the right road, if he is 
 half-lost himself. The Londoners speak barbarous 
 English. Well may their literati hail with trans- 
 ports Webster's unabridged. Indeed, their orators 
 ought to finish their English studies in Philadelphia. 
 They the common people are, moreover, very 
 superstitious full of fearful traditions, which they 
 hold next to Scripture. We might give one example : 
 "The time is coming when a blind man shall hold 
 the horses of three kings at the foot of London 
 bridge, while England shall be lost and won three 
 times in one day." Every one is disappointed in 
 London at first sight. Its principal prestige is its 
 overgrown qualities. The houses are generally 
 made of brick, which are the color of ours before 
 they are burned. This dingy hue, noways improved 
 by smoke and the almost continual moisture of the 
 atmosphere, has any thing but a pleasant appear- 
 ance. The city is disgusting in comparison with 
 New York, Baltimore, or Boston. In all our trad-
 
 SEA-LIFE. by 
 
 ing with London, embracing all seasons, we never 
 saw three bright, sunshiny days. It is not my 
 purpose to dwell on this city. Travelers have, 
 again and again, described its lions I thought I 
 would only turn up some of its substratum. I 
 would hardly do justice, though, in passing by the 
 Battle of the Bee-hive, which happened while we 
 were there. There was a beer-house, not far from 
 the Tower, called the "Bee-hive," which had been 
 so long patronized by the Yankees, that the Amer- 
 ican flag waved over it perpetually. At that time 
 there was an unusual number of Portuguese in 
 port, and they came suddenly and unexpectedly 
 upon the Americans, drove them out, and pulled 
 down the flag. The next week the Americans mus- 
 tered a considerable army, and undertook to dis- 
 lodge the enemy. The battle was severe. In the 
 midst of the fray, the Irish got to hear of it in 
 their quarters, and they came pouring down like a 
 hurricane. Some one hailed the leader, and asked 
 him where he was rushing: 
 
 " There 's a fight on hand, me darling ! and we 
 mean to have a finger in the pie." 
 
 "Which side will you take?" 
 
 "American, sure; for they say there is a little 
 Ireland in America." 
 
 And they pitched in, knocking down, and dragging 
 out. The fight became so serious that they had to 
 order troops from the Tower to quell it ; and several 
 loads of the wounded were carried to the hospital.
 
 68 THEHELM. 
 
 The Bee-hive, however, was retaken, and the 
 American flag, for aught we know, may be flying 
 there to the present day. 
 
 According to our best observations, England is 
 the most intemperate nation on earth. Often have 
 we seen the lower class of females, with flushed 
 cheeks, staggering along the city, taking both 
 sides of the walk. Those in better circumstances 
 drink their coffee laced, as they call it, with French 
 brandy, or West India rum. But let us put out 
 into blue water again.
 
 VOYAGE UP THE NORTH SEA. 69 
 
 
 VOYAQE UP THE NORTH SEA. 
 
 ONE of the most interesting voyages I ever made 
 was up the North Sea. As it was in the days of 
 the " Rambouillet decree," our ship joined a fleet 
 of merchantmen of about seventy sail, under the 
 convoy of a large English sloop-of-war, and a gov- 
 ernment vessel of inferior metal. When the weather 
 is fine, with a tolerable breeze and smooth sea, there 
 can be no scene more pleasant than a fleet under 
 convoy. It always brings to the mind the idea of 
 a hen with her numerous brood. The fleet was 
 made up of vessels of different nations, order, and 
 speed. Ships, brigs, schooners, sloops, and galliots 
 composed the motley mixture. So various were 
 they in respect to speed especially, that,, while 
 some were leisurely careering along under close- 
 reefed top- sails, and sometimes one of them aback, 
 others were groaning under a crowd of sail, top- 
 gallant sails, studding sails, and all the canvas that 
 they could show. Sometimes they seemed to lie 
 almost gunwales under, and yet appeared to be sta- 
 tionary on the waves. Ours was a first-rate Yir- 
 ginia merchantman, and her speed had tried many 
 a British frigate in the time of the Chesapeake
 
 70 THE HELM. 
 
 commotion. Consequently, we walked among them 
 at our pleasure ; and, backing and filing through 
 the fleet, we enjoyed the luxury of conversing freely 
 with persons from almost every part of the world. 
 This was vastly ^ffeasant. We had heretofore made 
 long and lonesome voyages across the Atlantic, and 
 we enjoyed but seldom the felicity of speaking a 
 ship at sea. Under such circumstances, the cheer- 
 ing cry of "Sail ho! sail ho!" springs a flash of joy 
 in every bosom, from the captain to the cabin-boy. 
 The strange sail appears at first like a dark speck 
 in the distant horizon. Presently we see her hov- 
 ering like a dark bird in our wake. We look 
 again, and she is gone. We rush on to our respect- 
 ive destinies; but with renewed impressions of the 
 shortness of the voyage of life, and the rapid flight 
 of time. The Bible student almost involuntarily 
 exclaims, with Job, " They pass away like the fast- 
 sailing ships." But on the North Sea we found our- 
 selves in the midst of a floating, fugitive city, and 
 the solitude of ocean seemed to be driven away. 
 One night we were suddenly alarmed by a torrent 
 of blue flame, pouring over the stern of a distant 
 bark. This was the signal of an enemy close 
 aboard. It was at this particular time that the 
 analogy between the fleet and a brood of chickens 
 
 O*/ 
 
 struck most forcibly. Immediately the man-of-war 
 made signal lights for us to consolidate. The ves- 
 sels in advance hove to, or shortened sail; while 
 those which were laboring astern, and had been
 
 VOYAGE UP THE NOETH SEA. 71 
 
 straining a perpetual race from the beginning, 
 crowded more. We soon huddled together like 
 frightened chickens, while the sloop-of-war, wheel- 
 ing round as an angry hen would do to face the 
 hawk, left us in charge of her consort, and crowded 
 all sail in chase of the privateer. 
 
 And, while we are thus hove to, permit me to 
 tell a story about an American merchantman that 
 was taken at this time. The enemy proved to be a 
 Danish privateer. She hastily threw a prize-master 
 and crew on board, and ordered them into the first 
 port. The Americans were not confined, and, as 
 they had open intercourse .with each other, the cap- 
 tain formed a plan to retake the vessel. He told 
 his men to be always ready; that he would em- 
 brace the most favorable opportunity; and that the 
 signal or watchword should be, "The ship's our 
 own." Hours after hours rolled by, and no good 
 opportunity seemed to present itself. At last the 
 destined port hove in view. The ship was rapidly 
 nearing the harbor. Orders were given to over- 
 haul the cable and clear the anchor. The American 
 ensign was hoisted under their national flag. The 
 captive captain bit his lips. He cast a feverish 
 glance around. He saw his hearts of oak at their 
 stations, and their indignant sky-lights fastened 
 upon him. He could stand no more, but bellowed 
 out, in a voice that echoed from stem to tafferel, 
 " THE SHIP 's OUR OWN." Some of the Danes, hav- 
 ing an imperfect knowledge of the English, under-
 
 72 THEHELM. 
 
 stood him to say, " The ship 's aground," and they 
 reiterated in their own tongue, "The ship 's 
 aground the ship's aground." These were luck- 
 less words; for every Dane ran to look over the 
 sides, to see if the ship's way was stopped. The 
 Americans had meditated a bloody rescue, and had 
 stationed a hand at the carpenter's chest, below, to 
 supply them with deadly tools. Not that they had 
 any particular spite against their foreign ship- 
 mates; but they were harrowed up by the thoughts 
 of a Danish prison. But when they saw them 
 standing so convenient to the blue water, they con- 
 cluded to give them the most honorable quietus 
 that a conquered sailor could ask for; so they 
 tipped them over the sides, and gave them a 
 launch, as they expressed it, into " Davy Jones's 
 locker." A strong and active American brought 
 the man at the helm a kind of lee-lurch and 
 weather-roll, and sent him sprawling into the scup- 
 pers, dryly observing that, as the ship had changed 
 her papers, and it was necessary to relieve the 
 helm, he believed he would take the first trick at 
 the wheel. As he said this, he cocked his eye up 
 to the mizzen-peak, where the national flags were 
 taking a somersault extraordinary. Meantime the 
 captain spread himself as large as life on the quar- 
 ter-deck, and once more cried out with an untram- 
 meled tongue, "Sard a-lee, there I Foresheet, fore- 
 top-bowline, jib and staysail sheets, let go /" The 
 saucy Eliza sprung at once into the wind's eye;
 
 VOYAGE UP THE NOETH SEA. 73 
 
 and in the next moment was heard, "Maintop-sail 
 haul! Board tacks, and gather aft!" And, as 
 they slewed their spanker to the shore, the aston- 
 ished natives, who had crowded the wharf to see 
 the prize enter, beheld the bright Stars and Stripes 
 of the American Republic floating over the hum- 
 bled bunting of Denmark. You may well suppose 
 that the crew was not slow in obeying the command 
 to muster aft and give three cheers, and then to 
 break loose, in their hearty manner, and sing: 
 
 " Stretch her off, my brave boys ! 
 
 For it never shall be said 
 That the sons of America 
 
 Were ever yet afraid. 
 Stretch her off, my brave boys!" 
 
 The best of all is, we have no list of the killed 
 and wounded, for this singular maneuver took place 
 almost in the mouth of the harbor, and it was un- 
 doubtedly a bloodless victory. The discharged 
 crew, of course, took to their flippers; and their 
 active countrymen on shore would hardly let them 
 perish. But the Eliza left them diving and floun- 
 dering about like a Dutch galliot in the Bay of 
 Biscay. 
 
 In returning to the fleet, we would observe, how 
 often do we realize through life the folly of trust- 
 ing in chariots or horses, or even in ships, however 
 strong they may be! While we on board the Shef- 
 field were felicitating ourselves on 'our advantages, 
 both in regard to labor and safety because the 
 easy sail we carried was not too much for an ordi-
 
 74 THE HELM. 
 
 nary gale, and while others were continually making 
 or taking in sail, we had but little to do a storm 
 came on, when we discovered that an unforeseen evil 
 was preparing to devour us. The ballast which we 
 had taken in, and which seemed sufficiently solid, 
 proved to be a species of quicksand. The pumps 
 became choked, and the bilge water, diffusing itself 
 through the ballast, liquefied the whole mass, and 
 the shifting boards" were not sufficient for this 
 exigency. The ship could stand on neither tack 
 without capsizing. The hatches could not be safely 
 moved with the heavy sea that was going. The 
 scene, as viewed from the between-decks by the 
 light of our candles, was truly appalling. The bal- 
 last rolled in terrific waves fore and aft, and we 
 had in the hold a fearful miniature of the storm 
 that was raging without. Our captain was entirely 
 unmanned he wept like a child ; and as I- stooped 
 down by his side to hold the lamp, more than once 
 or twice I heard the half-smothered prayer, "Lord, 
 have mercy upon us!" We hoisted a signal of dis- 
 tress, when our noble convoy bore down, and threw 
 several boat-loads of hardy sailors on board. "With 
 much labor we succeeded in establishing shifting- 
 boards, and securing the ballast, so as to go on 
 with some degree of safety. However, this gale 
 dissolved all our social compacts, and the fleet was 
 scattered to congregate no more. 
 
 In a few days we were standing in for Norway. 
 The prospect on approaching this coast was most
 
 VOYAGE UP THE NORTH SEA. 75 
 
 sublime. We do not say it was the most pleasing 
 ever witnessed. The most enchanting scene we 
 ever beheld of the kind was on a previous voyage, 
 while making the coast of Holland. Hearing on 
 that occasion the cheering cry of "Land ho!" I 
 sprung from below, and looking over the weather 
 bow, saw numerous stacks of chimneys, steeples, 
 and spires rising apparently out of the sea, while 
 the morning sun was playing upon them with his 
 dazzling beams. All on board seemed to be per- 
 fectly entranced. It appeared to exceed all of 
 witchcraft lore or fairy scenery that had ever been 
 told. "What have we here?" exclaimed I. "A 
 Dutch village," said one. "But where is the 
 land?" "In the watch below; and never a needle- 
 full will you see for an hour to come." And so it 
 was. Presently we raised the roofs of the houses, 
 then the windows, and, last of all, a dark pencil 
 line, as it were, disclosing the bank or levee which 
 protects the coast from the sea, and the whole 
 country from inundation. On entering the river, 
 we found that it was protected by a similar levee. 
 All the meadows and pastures were separated by 
 verdant banks of like construction; and to one aloft 
 the whole face of the country wore the appearance 
 of a vast honeycomb. The contrast between this 
 and the coast of Norway was very striking. Here 
 Nature presented herself in her most rugged sublim- 
 ity. Lofty mountains, frightful cliffs, and flinty 
 promontories stretched along the coast. We had a
 
 76 THE HELM. 
 
 good pilot on board but to be standing full on this 
 iron-bound country, with all sail set, and not a bay, 
 inlet, sandbank, or river's mouth, to indicate a har- 
 bor at hand, was truly terrific. Still she sailed on, 
 and sailed on; and every knot she ran seemed to 
 render the prospect more and more horrible. At last 
 a narrow passage around a needle, that stood out of 
 the sea, began to discover itself. We entered in, 
 but it appeared to terminate against a perpendicu- 
 lar cliff, not far ahead, where it seemed we must of 
 necessity come to the end of our rope. But just 
 before we reached the frightful point, another pas- 
 sage presented, and another; and so we glided, as it 
 were, among the enormous fragments of a ruined 
 coast, till at last we shot into a tranquil basin, 
 entirely shut in from the sea. The water here was 
 smooth as a mirror, and clear and blue as the 
 waves of the midway ocean. Even our very royal 
 masts were protected from the storms that idly 
 raged without; and in front of our anchorage stood 
 the beautiful and romantic village of Christiansand. 
 Were we writing the history of our travels in full, 
 we would love to dwell on this Norwegian scenery ; 
 but we have brought our readers into this part 
 merely to relate a circumstance which overshad- 
 owed our whole crew with mourning. 
 
 After the ship had taken in a cargo of lumber, 
 and was prepared to depart on the next morning, it 
 was the turn of one part of the crew to have a 
 night's liberty on shore. When the evening came,
 
 VOYAGE UP THE NORTH SEA. 77 
 
 the forecastle was lighted up; and there was a gen- 
 eral overhauling of chests, in search of some favor- 
 ite articles of dress, long togs, etc. An unusual glee 
 pervaded the ship's company. There was a man on 
 board named Charles. He was a Polander by birth. 
 He was a man of more dignified bearing than gen- 
 erally falls to the lot of sailors, and, according to his 
 own account, had held some important office in the 
 army. He spoke English badly, but was so full of 
 hilarity and good-humor, that he was a universal 
 favorite. He was, moreover, the handsomest man 
 on board; which, by the by, he might have been 
 without being a prodigy, for we were a hard- 
 favored collection of weather dogs. This last-men- 
 tioned quality was no let or hinderance to his 
 popularity on board, as sailors think that beauty 
 may do for soldiers or barbers' clerks. Charles had 
 worn an uncommonly-gloomy appearance all this 
 afternoon; and while the joke, the laugh, the repar- 
 tee were going their usual rounds in the fore peak, 
 a settled cloud rested on his brow. I have wished 
 often since that I had taken him aside, and asked 
 him seriously what was resting on his mind; for I 
 have a curiosity to the present day to know whether 
 some awful presentiment was gnawing on his spirits, 
 or whether he was meditating some dark deed, un- 
 worthy of his general character. At last he made 
 a powerful effort to shake off his reverie, and began 
 to prepare for the shore. All things being adjusted, 
 the company lightly tripped over the main deck,
 
 78 THE HELM. 
 
 and, passing out at the starboard gangway, entered 
 into a flat, which had been used in bringing off our 
 stores. There were no oars kept in her, as one good 
 shove would generally send her to the wharf. 
 Charles was the last who entered in. Some one 
 cried out, "Give her a good headway, Charley." 
 He took a very heavy set. The scow shot like an 
 arrow; but poor Charley, being either unable or 
 unwilling God knows which to recover himself, 
 fell with a tremendous plunge. The men in the flat 
 were receding from him, and having no means of 
 coming to his rescue, could only cry out with might 
 and main, "Man overboard!" The alarming cry 
 rang from ship to ship, from shore to shore, in all 
 the babbling languages of the harbor. "Man over- 
 board! man overboard!" This, with the darkness 
 of the night, the plunging into boats, the rattling 
 of oars, the bursting forth of lights upon the water 
 and the land, formed a scene awfully terrific. At 
 the onset of alarm, those of us who were on board 
 searched diligently all around the ship for the pin- 
 nace, but no boat could we see; yet when he had 
 sunk to rise uo more alive, we found the boat fast- 
 ened to the larboard gangway, with all her oars in. 
 Our general belief in that day was, that "our eyes 
 were blinded that we could not perceive." And 
 many a fearful talk about that pinnace did we 
 have at sea, under the lee of the long-boat. Nearly 
 all night was spent in raking for the body, but to 
 no purpose. A deep gloom fell on the crew. The
 
 VOYAGE UP tfHE NORTH SEA. 79 
 
 next morning, with heavy hearts, we manned the 
 windlass and got under way. After we arrived in 
 England, we received a friendly letter, stating that 
 the body of poor Charles was found on the day we 
 sailed, and that he was buried with all the nautical 
 honors that the port could afford.
 
 80 THEHELM. 
 
 V. 
 STORMS AND SHORT ALLOWANCE. 
 
 WE have been sometimes asked if we were ever 
 shipwrecked. We never were, but we have en- 
 countered many dangerous and stripping storms. 
 Once on the midway ocean we encountered a gale 
 that continued for several days with increasing vio- 
 lence. It came on gradually, so that we could 
 shorten sail as it increased. This we did continu- 
 ally, till we were under bare poles, hoping that this 
 would suffice. But still the gale increased, so that 
 we had to send down our top-sail yards, and even 
 house the topmasts. But it raged on till we had 
 to lower down our lower yards, and then it became 
 a perfect hurricane. The seas broke over our decks, 
 sweeping fore and aft, and we were apprehensive 
 we would have to cut away our lower masts. The 
 heavy thumps of conflicting surges so opened her 
 seams as to cause profuse leaking, and we were 
 under constant apprehension of the ship swamping 
 under us. For several days we had no regular 
 meals, and when we did eat it was raw provision; 
 for it was impossible to cook. As tenacious as the 
 captain was of his fine cabin, he had to take his
 
 STORMS AND SHORT ALLOWANCE. 81 
 
 crew into it, for the forecastle was necessarily bat- 
 tened down. Such was the laboring and pitching 
 of the ship, that the men could not keep their feet 
 while eating a morsel. One man had to sit on the 
 floor with his feet pressed against the locker; 
 another would get behind him, and press his feet 
 against the back of the first, and so on till they 
 formed a line across the cabin. Then a piece of 
 fat raw pork was handed from one to another, and 
 every man would out with his knife and cut off a 
 hunk. The bread-bag was passed in the same way, 
 and so we took our meals. When the gale subsided, 
 it was like rigging a new ship, to get her in order 
 to pursue her course. But we were once in a more 
 dangerous position than this, as we thought. We 
 were bound for Spain, and. making for Cadiz the 
 land in view. After a beautiful morning the at- 
 mosphere became hazy. We were under a press of 
 canvas, when we were suddenly struck by a le- 
 vanter. I was at the helm at the time. The square 
 mainsail flew from its bolt-ropes like a handkerchief. 
 In clapping the helm aweather, it seemed to me as 
 if my ribs were crushed. The captain called -two 
 men to the helm, and as soon a^the ship was got- 
 ten under proper sail, we began to beat off; but it 
 was a vain effort. We were partly land-locked, 
 and in consequence of the reduction of sail, we 
 made much leeway. It blew furiously. The le- 
 vanter is supposed by some to be the euroclydon, 
 which shipwrecked the apostle Paul. In the midst
 
 82 T H E II E L M . 
 
 of all our trouble, night dark, moonless, starless 
 night came on. When we tacked toward the shore, 
 we would stand on till the surf could be dimly dis- 
 cerned like an enormous drift of snow, while its 
 thunder would rise superior to all the howlings of 
 the tempest. It was evident that with all our effort 
 we were gradually nearing the shore. Although 
 our topsails were close-reefed, the canvas new, and 
 our spars strong, yet it seemed a miracle to all on 
 board that she could carry any sail in such a driv- 
 ing tornado. The captain at last spoke out, "The 
 gale is increasing, the sails and spars can not stand 
 this much longer. If we take in any more sail it 
 will only hasten our fate. Carpenter, get your ax; 
 if a yard breaks, or a sail splits, we will have to 
 cut away the masts and let her go perhaps on an 
 iron-bound coast, where all will be lost." A silent 
 agony seemed to reign over the crew. The voice 
 of cursing and swearing had long since been hushed. 
 The boasting sailor stood as quiet as a lamb. When 
 a spar would give an unusual creak, the sailors 
 would squat almost to the deck, as though to re- 
 ceive with humble submission the final blow. 0, 
 what prayers silently ascended! What promises 
 were made! The bitterness of death was almost 
 passed, when it pleased God in his infinite mercy 
 to haul the wind round six or seven points, so that, 
 though the storm blew with greater violence, we 
 were enabled to stand out to sea. 
 
 We are aware that some who are accustomed to
 
 STORMS AND SHORT ALLOWANCE. 83 
 
 sea matters will regard this as incredible incredible 
 that the ship should beat off as long as she did, 
 with such close sail incredible that she could carry 
 sail at all. But we can add some things which will 
 give testimony to the violence of the blow. When 
 the weather moderated, we stood into the harbor, 
 and found that the vessels that outrode the storm 
 had housed their masts, and were pitching and 
 heaving, as if they would tear themselves away 
 from their moorings. Seventeen vessels in the har- 
 bor, mostly American, dragged anchors, during the 
 gale, and stranded on the side of the bay where 
 the French army was then encamped, and were 
 burned. A large Spanish prison ship, full of French 
 soldiers, was driven ashore, and saved by their own 
 countrymen. The inhabitants said there had not 
 been such a storm on that coast for twenty years. 
 The people saw us struggling without before night 
 came on, and they said, "That poor crew will be 
 rolling among the rocks before morning." When 
 we give these cases of narrow escape, we do not 
 mean that they were the only blows we had to en- 
 counter. We have had storms upon storms, and have 
 been frightened ways without number. But there 
 are other things we had to grapple with besides 
 storms. One of the evils incident to a sea-faring 
 life, is that of being put on short allowance. 
 
 True, it is not of frequent occurrence. We never 
 realized it but once. The captain had determined 
 to run down the trades on his return voyage, and
 
 84 THE HELM. 
 
 we soon got into a mild climate, where we had 
 almost uninterrupted clear weather overhead 
 weather very similar to our Indian Summer of the 
 West; but the great botheration was, we had no 
 wind. "Week after week, with an occasional paren- 
 thesis, our fine ship lay entirely becalmed. Some 
 who have never been on the seas, regard a calm as 
 being a season of desirable rest, notwithstanding it 
 may be accompanied with the slight drawback of 
 homesickness. But nothing is more annoying on 
 the seas. Although at such a time the surface of 
 the water is as smooth as a mirror, yet the long 
 and heavy swells continue; and as there is not air 
 enough to fill the sails, so as to steady the ship, 
 there is a continual and irregular rolling and tum- 
 bling. The blocks and ropes are perpetually slam- 
 ming against the standing rigging, and the sails 
 flapping on the masts, and every thing above and 
 below, fore and aft, jerking and surging, in spite of 
 all the elects and lashings that human ingenuity 
 can devise. It seems as if all inanimate appurten- 
 ances on board have risen up in wild rebellion, as 
 though to avenge themselves for all the straining 
 and hauling they have endured from time to time. 
 It is a perfect jubilee of misrule with blocks and 
 tackles, and all their allies. The sailor-boy on the 
 yard-arm, jerked and twisted as he is, sees the sail 
 stealthily falling back toward him; he thinks he 
 may control its gravity by a slight slue; but it 
 gives a sudden rasp across his knuckles, the tears
 
 STORMS AND SHORT ALLOWANCE. 85 
 
 spring from his eyes, he grinds his teeth, and while 
 he is in the act of shaping a ripsneezer half curse, 
 half prayer the leech sweeps back like lightning, 
 raking unmercifully the whole vertebral column, 
 and tossing his tarpaulin sportively on the blue 
 waves, with the cheers and laughter of the whole 
 crew, who are hungry for the slightest incident that 
 might break upon the monotony of the incessant 
 clattering; while poor Jack, clapping his hand to 
 his maintop, is right glad to find that his scalp is 
 left behind. Sometimes, from the mast-head, we 
 would see a beautiful stripe of wind, far away to 
 the larboard or starboard, and some happy vessel 
 booming along with all sail set; but notwithstand- 
 ing all our whistling, and all our wooing, not a 
 solitary puff would kiss our sails. A sickening 
 ennui pervaded the crew, and all, from the captain 
 to the cook, unnaturally longed for a driving 
 tempest. 
 
 After we had been out more than a month, the 
 discontent of the crew was increased by their to- 
 bacco falling short. Those of liberal build, who 
 had not been accustomed to chew their morsel 
 alone, first began to feel the pressure. The foreign 
 sailors, whose standing-rule was to take care of 
 No. 1, held out longer, and speculated some on the 
 necessities of their shipmates; but as the prospect 
 became more dreary, they closed up their stocks 
 against love or money, When we were called to 
 dinner, some would hide their quids in the most
 
 86 THE HELM. 
 
 secret places they could find; but one peculiar 
 quality of starvation is the sharpening of sight, and 
 others would find these "old soldiers," as they 
 called them, and transfer them to a warmer berth. 
 At last all was gone, and the crew, generally, sub- 
 stituted oakum, or rope-yarn, for the precious weed. 
 
 But after a while our provisions began to fail, 
 and short allowance was proclaimed. Our water 
 was not so much reduced; but as it was uncertain 
 how long we might be detained, we were allowed a 
 quart per day. This we thought would do; but we 
 had not taken into consideration that a day was 
 twenty- four hours, and that we would require as 
 much drink in our long watches on deck at night 
 as in the day-time. Well, as for our water, we 
 would generally drink it all off before sunset, and 
 then be tormented with a burning thirst till the 
 next day at noon, when our rations would be dis- 
 tributed. 
 
 Our meat allowance was still more spare. At 
 dinner-time the meat was taken into the forecastle. 
 Some just salt was appointed to cut it up into 
 twelve equal pieces. This was spread out on a 
 board. One of the apprentices was sent upon deck, 
 the lid of the scuttle was drawn over, and the 
 carver putting his knife on a piece, would say, 
 "Who shall have this?" The boy above would 
 answer, "Long Jack." 
 
 "And who shall have this?" 
 
 Tom hog-face Tom."
 
 STORMS AND SHORT ALLOWANCE. 87 
 
 And so they would go on to the end of the mess ; 
 and happy was he who got the fattest gob; for the 
 share of one man, for twenty-four hours, was not 
 larger than his thumb. 
 
 After being out three months from the Land's 
 End of England, we made the coast of America off 
 Savannah. As soon as the rope was thrown to the 
 pilot-boat, the crew, as with the voice of one man, 
 said, "Have you any tobacco?" "Plenty plenty," 
 said the pilot, and he soon handed up about a 
 pound of nigger-heads, as they were called in those 
 days. Then the pump was put into the water-cask, 
 the kid well filled, the bread-bag replenished, and 
 the songs and laughter of merry-hearted men were 
 heard in the fore peak. So, we may imagine, felt 
 the poor prodigal, after he had abandoned the hog- 
 trough, and found himself seated with his parents 
 and sisters around the fatted calf, while the old 
 homestead shook with music and gladness. And 
 happier yea, almost infinitely feels the poor sin- 
 ner, when, redeemed from the husks and vanities of 
 the world, he first tastes the celestial riches of re- 
 deeming grace and dying love. 
 
 Thank God, there is no need of short allowance 
 in the old Ship of Zion; for she is laden with the 
 bread and water of life, and the great Captain says, 
 "Eat, my friends, and drink abundantly, my 
 beloved! In my presence is fullness of joy, and at 
 my right hand there are pleasures forever more." 
 Yes, her breezes are gales of love, and her calms
 
 88 THEHELM. 
 
 are calms indeed. Her spirit-rations are of the 
 wine of the kingdom; and well may the poet say 
 of that 
 
 " New life it sheds through dying hearts, 
 
 And cheers the drooping mind, 
 Vigor and joy its juice imparts, 
 Without a sting behind." 
 
 Come on board, fellow-sinners, and eat, that you 
 may live forever; and drink, that you may thirst 
 no more. It is true, that while we are in this dis- 
 ordered world, we may suffer, physically, starvation, 
 or even shipwreck; but our souls may feed and 
 feast upon the promises of God; and as it regards 
 our bodily sufferings, we may say 
 
 " Lord ! what are all our sufferings here, 
 
 If thou but count us meet 
 With that enraptured host to appear, 
 And worship at thy feet ?"
 
 SECOND MATE PRIVATEERING. 89 
 
 VI. 
 
 SECOND MATE PRIVATEERINQ. 
 
 HAVING spent several years in acquiring a knowl- 
 edge of seamanship, under promising circumstances 
 I went out second mate of a brig owned in Boston. 
 The captain and. the crew, with the exception of 
 myself, were all New England men. I soon saw a 
 great difference between them and Southern sailors. 
 The sailors employed in the South are generally 
 citizens of the world, with few local attachments 
 their home, if they have any, upon the sea. The 
 Yankee crew is often an association of neighbors, 
 having abiding habitations on the land, and sympa- 
 thies clinging around institutions on shore ; and their 
 voyages are more like speculative enterprises than 
 an unconditional lifetime business. They will talk 
 about deacons and sextons, and never forget thanks- 
 giving day, but distinguish it by large batches of 
 sweetcake, and plenty of codfish. Each man must 
 have a suit of long clothes to go ashore in. The 
 Southern sailor glories in his sea-rigging. There is 
 more familiarity between the officers and men on 
 board our Northern ships than would be tolerated 
 
 South. The captain of our brig was an elderly 
 
 8
 
 90 THEHELM. 
 
 man, and had seen much service in the "West India 
 trade and coastwise, and was a good sailor; but he 
 was very deficient in education. He could scarcely 
 write so as to be understood, and I soon saw he was 
 very bungling in making his daily calculations. I 
 continued to keep my journal indeed, it was now 
 my official duty to do so. When we were pretty 
 well on in our voyage, he said one evening, "Mr. 
 L., you have been looking over your reckoning. 
 How near do you suppose we are to land, and 
 what point would we reach standing on our present 
 course?" I answered, according to my reckoning, 
 we are near land, and keeping the course we are 
 now on, we ought to make Silly about twelve o'clock 
 to-night. At this he started up, and said contempt- 
 uously, "Silly! you must be a great navigator, 
 indeed, and you are out in your distance by two 
 hundred miles; and then on this course she would 
 run pretty well up the British channel." This was 
 said before the man at the helm, and I considered 
 it insulting, but there was no redress. 
 
 He retired into the cabin, and having the watch 
 on deck, I kept a bright look-out. Being a young 
 man, I did not expect to be very correct in my 
 reckoning; and I knew that some old captains were 
 sometimes as much as two hundred miles out in 
 their distance. While studying on these matters, a 
 bright light flashed up ahead, and in a moment it 
 vanished returned vanished. It was with tumult- 
 uous delight I stepped into the cabin and roused up
 
 SECOND MATE PRIVATEERING. 91 
 
 the captain. " What 's the matter, Mr. L. ?" " Silly 
 light, sir." "Why will you persist in that, Mr. L. ? 
 How do you know it is Silly light, sir?" " Because 
 it is a revolving light." 
 
 "What do you mean by a revolving light?" 
 "It revolves or turns, so as to appear and dis- 
 appear alternately." 
 
 He bustled up on deck just as the light was in 
 all its brilliancy; but when it disappeared he 
 laughed and said, " Where is your Silly now ? It 's 
 the light of a ship bobbing up and down in the 
 seas." He had hardly said this before it flashed up 
 again. 
 
 "Mr. L., have you ever seen this light before?" 
 "Yes, twice. There is no light like it on all the 
 English coast. Look at the chart, and you will 
 have to give it a wider berth, or be a wreck before 
 morning." This awakened him. I have always be- 
 lieved if he had been alone in navigation the brig 
 would have been laid a wreck. On his return he 
 claimed to be the best sailor, but said, "Mr. L. is 
 the best navigator." 
 
 As preparatory to the return-passage, the captain 
 had all his empty beef-barrels filled with fresh water, 
 as he supposed he was deficient in water-casks. We 
 did not blame him for doing so, in case of emerg- 
 ency. But in open disregard of the old sailor- 
 proverb, "Use the best first, and you will always 
 have the best," he ordered that the beef-barrels 
 should be broached first; and as the voyage was
 
 92 THE HELM. 
 
 short we used no other water. The consequence 
 was, the whole ship's company was afflicted with a 
 violent diarrhea. It fastened on me, without inter- 
 mission, for three years. On our return the captain 
 was sick, and heavy duties rested on me. On making 
 the coast we had to beat and knock about in almost 
 constant snow-storms, till in a great measure ex- 
 hausted. "When we arrived I received the first sum 
 of money, of much account, which I had ever 
 earned. 
 
 When we returned, we found that our Govern- 
 ment had passed the non-intercourse law, interdict- 
 ing commerce with both England and France. 
 Still some of our merchantmen would clear out, and 
 manage by spurious papers to evade the law. One 
 of our merchants sent for me, and proposed my 
 taking the command of one of his vessels. I told 
 him plainly that I would undertake nothing that 
 involved perjury, let consequences be what they 
 might. Immediately the war followed. There I 
 was like a fish out of water. I can not convey to 
 the reader, unless he has experienced it, the sick- 
 ening ennui that takes possession of the sailor after 
 he has been a few weeks on shore. It is this which 
 principally continues the supply and unbroken suc- 
 cession. After dreadful disasters at sea, it is amus- 
 ing to hear the unalterable resolves of the forecastle. 
 One will say, "Bloody end to me, if I am ever 
 caught on sea again, if ever I put my foot on land. 
 Why should I be knocked about all my days, living
 
 SECOND MATE PKI VATEE RING. 93 
 
 a dog's life, and no thanks for it? Why, look at 
 the farmer! if it storms, he can get under shelter 
 with his wife and cubs, and can look out of his 
 cabin and laugh at old Boreas 'blustering railer !' 
 What a happy life !" 
 
 "Farmer!" says another, "he's a gentleman, I 
 can tell you ; and it 's because we are his lackeys 
 to carry his produce at the expense of life and 
 limb. I would rather be his servant, and carry 
 guts to a bear, than to live this dog-life." 
 
 And thus they will growl on, and resolve and 
 re-resolve the whole crew, going home to dip 
 their feet in salt water no more. But, after they 
 have been ashore four weeks, the prettiest farm in 
 the country could not hold them, as a general 
 thing. "Come, boys who's for blue water?" 
 
 I felt this longing for the sea again. Life 
 seemed stripped of all its charms. I could not, 
 just then, get a place in the navy that could meet 
 my aspirations, or do justice to the feelings of my 
 family connections. Then came in the well-timed 
 temptation, to seek a prize-master's berth in a 
 privateer. I saw plainly with my religious edu- 
 cation it could not be otherwise that it was, mor- 
 ally speaking, a dirty business; and I shall ever 
 adore a merciful Providence that so strangely and 
 mercifully opened up for me a way of escape. 
 While waiting in a seaport, expecting a very suc- 
 cessful privateer to come in from her cruise, with 
 the prospect of getting a prize-master's office, I
 
 94 THE HELM. 
 
 received a letter from home, stating that all my 
 young friends were forming a volunteer company, 
 and were urgent for me to join them. This touched 
 a nobler chord in my heart; so I stuck a cockade 
 in my hat, and returned home. 
 
 Have not Christian nations, at least, arrived at 
 that point of moral science and international hon- 
 esty, that should induce them to abandon the prac- 
 tice of authorizing the shameful enterprise of pri- 
 vateering during war a mode of reprisal that 
 brings neither profit nor glory to any government; 
 but affliction, and ofttimes ruin, to thousands of 
 private citizens, who have no more share in the 
 injuries perpetrated by their nation than the birds 
 that fly over their heads. 
 
 Privateering is robbery. No government can issue 
 any kind of letters or parchments that can divest 
 it of this character in the view of high Heaven. 
 
 When a privateer takes a prize, the captives, 
 generally, are exposed to as much insult and out- 
 rage as is generally inflicted by a pirate; with the 
 lone exception of being made to walk the plank 
 a thing which no civilized people would tolerate. 
 
 The victors generally strip their prisoners of their 
 personal baggage, their change, their watches, their 
 clothes, down to their shirts and pantaloons, and 
 even if these strike their fancy, they will take 
 them in exchange for some of their cast-off duds, 
 if that may be called "exchange" where one party 
 is bound to submission without any alternative.
 
 SECOND MATE PRIVATEERING-. 95 
 
 It may be said, what can you expect of such un- 
 principled buccaneers as commonly man a privateer ? 
 But the whole responsibility does not rest with 
 them. "With all their natural and acquired taste 
 for plunder and carnage, they would be compara- 
 tively harmless, but for the impulse of those who 
 have fitted them out, and who claim the heft of 
 the plunder. And who are they? Most frequently 
 merchants, who embrace this opportunity of meanly 
 robbing on the high seas, those with whom they 
 formerly stood in friendly and commercial relations, 
 with whom they have for a series of years carried 
 on an honest and lucrative trade. They make no 
 other apologies for their infamous robberies than 
 that the Government has legalized them, and then 
 they laugh heartily at the fogy fanatics who mum- 
 ble about a higher law. 
 
 While privateering inflicts much suffering on the 
 unoffending citizens of the enemy, it has a very 
 disastrous reaction on the nation that institutes 
 and supports it. 
 
 It lessens the dignity of a government. What 
 civilized nation in this day would tolerate the prac- 
 tice of its army prosecuting the indiscriminate 
 plunder of the citizens of a country through which 
 they might be marching in triumph? When Gen- 
 eral Harrison landed on the shores of Canada, he 
 issued general orders forbidding his soldiers to 
 touch or destroy the property of the inhabitants. 
 The battalion of volunteers to which we belonged,
 
 96 THEHELM. 
 
 although they had been nearly twelve months in a 
 wilderness, under great privations, marched every 
 now and then under trees bending down with 
 the most delicious peaches. As these would rattle 
 against our helmets, we endured temptation; but 
 a proud national glory swelled our bosoms, under 
 the magnificence of the scene. But what right have 
 we to plunder on the seas, more than on the land? 
 
 Patriotism is the most diminutive motive lurking 
 in the bosom of a privateersman. He fights for 
 himself, and not for his country. Indeed, he chooses 
 not to fight at all, provided that unarmed and de- 
 fenseless game can be found; and it is only when 
 by fog or mishap he falls in with an armed enemy, 
 that he is compelled to show his teeth, and then 
 no longer than he can devise a way of escape. 
 
 "We were acquainted with a captain, who in the 
 war of 1812 commanded a privateer, which met 
 with singular success. He was at one time unin- 
 tentionally involved in a dreadful conflict, and ob- 
 tained a bloody victory. After the heat of battle 
 was over, and when he passed along the decks and 
 saw them strewed with the dead and wounded, deep 
 remorse seized his spirit. When he reflected that 
 all this murder and waste of life was for the avowed 
 purpose of accumulating spoil, he was filled with 
 compunction, then repentance; and, happily for him, 
 a repentance not to be repented of. He scudded 
 for his native shores, abandoned the privateer, and 
 became a humble follower of Christ.
 
 SECOND MATE BE. I V A T E E E I N G-. 97 
 
 While lie had nothing to do but to rob the un- 
 armed and unresisting, his eyes were closed to 
 the enormity of the crime; but this profusion of 
 blood and screaming agony awoke him to the guilt 
 and madness of his warfare. 
 
 The privateer is a school of robbery, a sink of 
 pollution to poison subjects and to scatter fire- 
 brands, incendiaries, and rottenness, through a whole 
 nation. It cost the United States more money to 
 sweep the Gulf Stream of pirates, in time of peace, 
 than all her privateers had taken during the war. 
 
 And when we see a government authorizing its 
 citizens to take, sink, burn, or destroy on the high 
 seas, we think of the advice given to the Philip- 
 pian jailer "Do thyself no harm." 
 
 It would certainly be to the interest and glory 
 of all nations to unite in putting away this detest- 
 able practice. 
 
 9
 
 98 THE ifWORD. 
 
 VII. 
 
 SOLDIER-LIFE. 
 
 WHEN the news of Hull's surrender reached the 
 patriotic town of Petersburg, in Virginia, it over- 
 whelmed the whole population with indignation and 
 sorrow. Some of the most popular young men, 
 with martial music, and the American ensign, 
 paraded the streets, and with impassioned appeals 
 called on their youthful associates to march to the 
 rescue. The scene that followed was soul-thrilling 
 to the patriot. Promising young men sprung their 
 counters, and fell into the ranks. Students of med- 
 icine and law shoved aside their volumes, suffi- 
 ciently uninteresting before, but now made abso- 
 lutely irksome by the ceaseless din of war, and 
 rushed to the standard. The mechanic threw the 
 uplifted hammer from his hand to swell the train. 
 The placid farmer rode to town to behold the mad- 
 ness of the people, but took the epidemic, and fell 
 in. And in a few days a company of one hundred 
 and four, richly uniformed, offered themselves to 
 the Government to serve twelve months under the 
 banner of the brave Harrison. No married man 
 was admitted into their ranks. There is no inci-
 
 SOLDIER-LIFE. 99 
 
 dent of merely a terrene nature that ever so 
 swelled our bosom, as did our departure from that 
 lovely town the bright scene of all our juvenile 
 
 joy 8 - 
 
 At an early hour in the day the company marched 
 to "Center Hill," which overlooked the town. 
 There they were met by a procession of women; 
 while two elect ladies, bearing a stand of colors, 
 richly and tastefully ornamented, presented them to 
 the company, with an appropriate address. Being 
 now all ready, with our knapsacks on our backs, 
 and all accoutered for the perilous campaign, we 
 marched down through the town, to the plaintive 
 tune of 
 
 " The girls we 've left behind us." 
 
 The doors, windows, and side-walks were crowded 
 with our friends, our parents, and our weeping sis- 
 ters. But the severest cut of all was as we wheeled 
 down into Bolingbrooke. At that corner the princi- 
 pal body of the inhabitants had assembled for the 
 purpose, as it seemed, of giving us a few parting 
 cheers. But they had not counted the conflict. It 
 is true, they simultaneously lifted their hats; but 
 their trembling lips grew pale, their arms fell pow- 
 erless to their sides, and a silent shower of tears 
 betrayed the true position of their souls. This was 
 a season of deep sorrow; but there was a magna- 
 nimity in the affliction that seemed to bear us up. 
 Many of our friends followed us several miles, in 
 carriages, on horseback, and on foot; but it only
 
 100 THE SWORD. 
 
 served to spring our tears afresh by a second and 
 more personal farewell. 
 
 The first night we encamped in a beautiful grove 
 near Ware-Bottom Church. On the next day we 
 made our entry into Richmond. As we drew nigh 
 the city, all the troops turned out to escort us in. 
 And, surrounded with prancing cavalry, the min- 
 gling music of conflicting bands, drums, and trum- 
 pets, covered with clouds of dust, and, as our simple 
 hearts thought, with glory too, we entered the cap- 
 ital. We were soon marched to a neighboring grove, 
 where we sat down, in military order, to the festive 
 board. Among the first visitors at our quarters 
 was the pious Jesse Lee, who, in almost every sol- 
 dier, recognized the son of some highly-esteemed 
 friend. He was solicited to give us a sermon. To 
 this he readily agreed. On the appointed day we 
 marched unarmed to the church, which was well 
 filled with citizens and soldiers. After the prelim- 
 inary services, he took for his text, "Shall your 
 brethren go to war, and shall ye sit here?" To 
 show how even religious minds are tinged with the 
 prevailing contagion, in times of special excitement, 
 we will slightly advert to his course. In the intro- 
 duction he solemnly protested against the spirit of 
 war offensive war such wars as were undertaken 
 to aggrandize a throne, to acquire territory, or to 
 satiate the thirst for military glory. But, first, he 
 proved of course very easily to us that the pres- 
 ent war was a rare exception. England had more
 
 SOLDIER-LIFE. 101 
 
 than once smitten us on the right cheek, and we 
 had as often turned unto her the left. Our Gov- 
 ernment had shown a singular example of Christian 
 forbearance, till forbearance had ceased to be a 
 virtue. The wellbeing, the very existence of our 
 nation depended on honorable resistance. Every 
 citizen was an integral part of the social confeder- 
 acy he was a partaker of all the immunities and 
 blessings of civil government he was protected in 
 his person, property, and character, and is relig- 
 iously bound to afford his quota of support. The 
 powers that be are ordained of God, yea, they are 
 his ministers, appointed for this very thing, and 
 bear not the sword in vain. Therefore, "render 
 unto Caesar the things that are Caesar's." Secondly, 
 he showed the spirit in which war should be waged. 
 Here he descended to all the minutiae of the sol- 
 dier's duty and conduct; and he gave the boys 
 abundance of godly advice, and showed very clearly 
 that, as handsomely equipped as we were, we were 
 lacking in a very important article of defense 
 " the armor of righteousness, on the right hand 
 and on the left." The application of his subject he 
 poured with scorching severity on the Eichmond 
 youth. With all the sarcastic and biting expression 
 of which he was master and he commanded a 
 legion of that matter he turned upon them and 
 said, "Will ye sit here and see your brethren go to 
 war?" And he preached not as one that beateth 
 the air on that occasion ; for they forthwith organ-
 
 102 THE SWORD. 
 
 ized a volunteer company according to the same 
 pattern. 
 
 We took up our line of march and pressed on. 
 The rumor of our coming, and the knowledge of 
 our daily progress, enabled the people to spread 
 their hospitalities in our way; so that, as far as 
 eating was concerned, we frequently had nothing to 
 do but march up to the rural board and partake of 
 the smoking barbecue. Thus we "sat down to eat, 
 and rose up to play." The report of our history, 
 as it rolled on before, became highly fabulous. 
 " Here comes the flower of Old Virginia ! every man 
 splendidly equipped at his own expense! They find 
 their own baggage-wagons, bear their own expense, 
 and there is n't a man among them with less than five 
 hundred dollars pin-money! Hurrah for Peters- 
 burg! Old Virginia never tire!" The people flat- 
 tered us, and cheered us, till we became as proud as 
 Lucifer. Our vanity, however, received an occa- 
 sional check. One day a wagoner had much ado to 
 hold his horses in a narrow pass till the company 
 got by. He, however, found time to give us a very 
 quizzical examination in detail; and as soon as he 
 got sufficient searoom in the rear to give us a rak- 
 ing fire, without fear of reprisal, he cried out at the 
 top of his voice, " I have heard of you before, boys. 
 They call you the flower of the land; but ye mind 
 me of the old saying, 'Fine feathers make fine 
 birds;' but if you an't as ugly a set of chaps as Old 
 Virginia ever hatched, I '11 give you my head for a
 
 SOLDIER-LIFE. 103 
 
 football." We, however, consoled ourselves with, 
 the surmise, that for this compliment we were more 
 indebted to the wrath into which his horses had 
 wrought him, than to his skill in physiognomy. 
 Indeed, the volunteers were generally handsome. 
 Petersburg was always celebrated for its beauties, 
 male and female. It is true we had some very 
 hard cases, almost enough to make the eyes of the 
 wagoner ache. Perhaps some comical lady reader, 
 who knows the author, may say, "Yes, and we will 
 plank you down with the proscribed remnant." 
 Well, be it so; but if so, we must, in justice to the 
 town in this particular, say, we were not exactly 
 born there; but those of the family who were, were 
 right good-looking. 
 
 Monticello lay in our route, or rather we made it 
 so lie, that we might have a sight of Virginia's 
 favorite sage. We drew up, in military array, at 
 the base of the hill on which the great house was 
 erected. About half way down the hill stood a 
 very homely old man, dressed in plain Virginia 
 cloth, his head uncovered, and his venerable locks 
 flowing in the wind. Some of our quizzical clique 
 at once marked him as a fit subject of fun. "I 
 wonder," said one, "what old codger that is, with 
 his hair blowing nine ways for Easter Monday." 
 "Why, of course," said another, "it is the overseer, 
 and he seems to be scared out of a year's growth. 
 I suspect he never saw gentlemen volunteers 
 before." But how were we astonished when he
 
 104 
 
 THE SWORD. 
 
 advanced to our officers and introduced himself as 
 THOMAS JEFFERSON! The officers were invited in 
 to a collation, while we were inarched off to the 
 town, where more abundant provision had been 
 made. 
 
 The most interesting prospect we had was when 
 we first came in view of the Blue Ridge. It ap- 
 peared, in the distance, like a dark wall stretched 
 along the horizon, and piled to the heavens. We 
 could not but admire the scene; yet our pleasure in 
 beholding it was considerably abated when we con- 
 templated the Herculean task of scaling it on the 
 morrow. At that distance it presented a uniform 
 surface, and seemed to forebode an almost perpendic- 
 ular ascent. Since that period we have been better 
 qualified to estimate the value of the old proverb, 
 "Do not climb the mountain till you get to it." 
 When we arrived at its base our road wound up a 
 dark ravine. True, when we would look ahead, an 
 insurmountable barrier seemed to stretch athwart 
 our way; but when arrived at the apparent diffi- 
 culty our tortuous pathway presented a gentle 
 ascent, sometimes a comfortable level, and occasion- 
 ally a little valley. And when we supposed our 
 troubles were merely beginning, we received the 
 happy announcement that we had surmounted all, 
 and were wending our way down into the valley of 
 the West. So it is in our journey through life. 
 How often does the pilgrim fret about troubles 
 ahead, which loom higher than the Blue Ridge
 
 SOLDIEE-LIFE. 
 
 mountains which he may never reach; and even if 
 he does, the Lord leads him by a way that he had 
 not known ! So the proverb is worthy of a binding 
 in the Apocrypha at least. 
 
 We had not traveled a hundred miles before the 
 whole corps were called after a new nomenclature, 
 our proper names being current only on the muster-- 
 roll. One was "Old Hickory," another "Plantation 
 Joe," another "Hog-face-Tom," "Sinbad," etc. 
 
 From our childhood, we had considered the Blue 
 Eidge to be the grand scenery of all backwoods ro- 
 mance. So it was natural for our straggling men 
 to expect a bear, or a tiger, or something else, to 
 pounce upon them from every thicket. One day we 
 came to an encampment, about a quarter of a mile 
 below a plantation. One of the boys was left con- 
 siderably in the rear. Pushing on through the 
 dusk of the evening, he saw a hideous animal 
 crouched up in the corner of the fence; and having 
 no doubt concerning its genus, he blazed away with 
 his musket, and running in full speed to the camp, 
 he cried out, "Boys, I have killed a bear! I have 
 killed a bear!" Some said, "How do you know it 
 is a bear? have you ever seen one before?" "No, 
 but; laws ! did n't I see its bristles when it was all 
 ready to spring upon me? and it was exactly like 
 the pictures you 've seen in the primers. Certainly 
 it is a bear, and we '11 go and get it as soon as it is 
 daylight." Away he went from camp-fire to camp- 
 fire, boasting of his exploit. But before he got
 
 106 9 THE SWORD. 
 
 through the lines an old farmer made his appearance 
 at head-quarters, and claimed indemnity for an old 
 black sow that one of the soldiers had shot. 
 
 Except when passing places of notoriety, the com- 
 pany proceeded in an informal march. On such 
 occasions all the blunders and improprieties of the 
 preceding day and night were canvassed in cate- 
 chetical form. One, for instance, would cry out 
 with a loud voice, "Who tried to kiss that girl last 
 night, and was shoved over into the wash-tub?" The 
 whole line would respond, "T. C." "Who shot the 
 old sow, and said it was a bear?" "Why, C. W." 
 From such popular decisions there was no appeal. 
 
 But the report, "They are coming! they are 
 coming!" climbed the mountains, and rolled on 
 before us; and the hospitality of our countrymen 
 was prodigious. Pressing on by the way of the 
 Springs, down the Kanawha, and crossing the Ohio 
 at Mt. Pleasant, we at last arrived at Chillicothe. 
 Here the Legislature, which was then in session, 
 gave us a splendid dinner, which was quickly fol- 
 lowed by one from the citizens. Here the festivals 
 of Virginia were thrown entirely in the shade; for 
 we had not only the substantials, the bacon and 
 cabbage of the Old Dominion, but fowls and turkeys, 
 pies, tarts, custards, and sweetmeats, and floating- 
 islands, and all the luxurious variety that the gen- 
 erous daughters of the Buckeye State could devise. 
 Surely, we thought, there was nothing like the 
 glory and honor of war. But, alas ! it was the lus-
 
 SOLDIER-LIFE. 107 
 
 cious finale of all our military glory! It is true, 
 we had fed, and feasted, and frolicked for a few 
 short weeks, and our march thus far had been like 
 a triumphal procession. But 0, how short our tri- 
 umph! how vulgar our happiness! 
 
 "We ate drank slept. What then? 
 We ate, and drank, and slept again." 
 
 And this was the total amount of all our joy; and 
 0, how dearly bought! 
 
 Our "Indian Summer" was now gone our "paw- 
 wah" days were over. As we left Chillicothe the 
 bleak North- Wester began to blow, the rains de- 
 scended, and the snows drove till the face of the 
 whole country was clothed with the white, cold 
 mantle of Winter. Through mud, and ice, and 
 storms, and swollen streams we forced our way to 
 Franklinton, which was then the head-quarters of 
 the army. For the twelve succeeding months our 
 tender volunteers, most of whom had not passed 
 their twentieth year, and in their fathers' houses 
 "had never waked but to a joyful morning," were 
 exposed to labors, dangers, deprivations, afflictions, 
 and deaths, of which their youthful minds had never 
 conceived. Often did they realize the prodigal 
 state the prodigal recollections, "in my father's 
 house there is bread and to spare." But it was not 
 for them, but for Uncle Sam, to say when they 
 might arise and return to the fathers and mothers, 
 and brothers and sisters. 0, these words were
 
 108 THE SWORD. 
 
 precious in those days. But we now had no abiding 
 city no May-days and holydays. We moved on 
 through the plat of Columbus, where there was, at 
 that time, only one house erected albeit, we left 
 Franklinton in its meridian glory. Through most 
 intolerable roads, and severe weather, we reached 
 the town of Delaware, which was even then a hand- 
 some village. But before reaching this desirable 
 spot, we were frequently stalled, and our baggage- 
 wagons broken down. Delaware was the ultima 
 thule of American civilization, as far as our route 
 was concerned. We passed only one cabin between 
 it and Sandusky. The plains of Crawford presented 
 nothing but a wild waste of crusted snow, through 
 which we marched with excessive labor. 
 
 When we reached the embodied host, on the bank 
 of the Sandusky, our little band seemed to mingle 
 as an atom in the long-extended line. At day-break 
 the whole force was mustered, in rank and file, on 
 the high banks of the river. The united music of 
 the army passed down the line; but truly it was 
 "music of melancholy sort." It was not the lively 
 tune of "Yankee Doodle," "The Soldier's Return," 
 or any of those rapturous airs so sweetly played at 
 the recruiting rendezvous, to lure the inebriate to 
 his doom; but it was an inexplicable breathing of 
 war and blood, which, in unison with the desolation 
 around, forced us, in one moment, to realize all that 
 we had ever read or listened to of Revolutionary 
 lore. Our feast of "marrow and fat things" had also
 
 SOLDIER-LIFE. 109 
 
 fled; and "soldier's fare" was the order of the day. 
 When our rations were first issued, while every man 
 was hearty, and our appetites keen, our allowance 
 was beggarly enough. But after a few cases of 
 sickness and spells of hypo, our stores began to ac- 
 cumulate, and we had enough provision, such as it 
 was ; but it was not the hams of Virginia, or the tur- 
 keys and tidbits of Ohio, but fresh beef and pork, and 
 that frequently without a dust of salt. The bread, 
 which was sometimes made of damaged flour, was 
 truly disgusting. This, however, was a small item 
 in the registry of our sufferings. While encamped 
 at Sandusky, it was issued in general orders that 
 the chaplain would preach on the Sabbath. Our 
 readers can scarcely imagine what interest -this 
 waked up in our ranks. Even the most irreligious 
 have a kind of property or claim in the Gospel that 
 they are not sensible of till the privilege is appar- 
 ently clean gone forever. At the appointed hour, 
 the entire army was marched into the hollow square, 
 the General and his staff in the center. The preach- 
 er took for his text, "And the Lord said unto 
 Moses, Speak unto the children of Israel that they 
 go forward." He first gave a historical account of 
 the Israelites, and held them up as a lucid example 
 of all that is martial, patriotic, and glorious. He 
 secondly made a most bombastic application of the 
 text to our militia, warmly exhorting them to cross, 
 not Jordan, but the line, and to take possession, not 
 of Canaan, but Canada: "The bones of the gal-
 
 110 THE SWORD. 
 
 lant Crawford, which lie bleaching in yonder plain, 
 cry out, move forward. The blood of the brave Mont- 
 gomery from the walls of Quebec cries out, march 
 forward." And thus he went on till his effusions 
 were found to be hateful; for whatever merit his 
 speech would have possessed, coming from a proper 
 source, and on a proper occasion, as a Gospel ser- 
 mon, it was monstrous. And this he might have 
 perceived by the simultaneous artificial coughing 
 that pervaded the whole square. The General ap- 
 peared to be mortified. "We were pleased to find, 
 in after years, that he hated all such untimely and 
 misplaced zeal. He has been heard to say that a 
 chaplain is an indispensable officer in the army; 
 but *no post, no department requires a more exem- 
 plary and evangelical minister. 
 
 It was midnight, the ground covered with snow, 
 the heavens profusely flaking down additional sup- 
 plies, and our heavy-laden tents were rocked to and 
 fro by the howling winds, when the troops were 
 suddenly aroused by a call to arms. Orders were 
 given for us to buckle on our knapsacks and blank- 
 ets, and to be ready to march at a moment's warn- 
 ing. In a few minutes we were plunged into the 
 dark and almost interminable forest, bound through 
 the Black Swamp to reenforce Harrison, who, after 
 Winchester's defeat, had fallen back on the Carry- 
 ing River. It was a dark, dark night. An expe- 
 rienced pilot led the van, and the whole detachment 
 followed in Indian-file, every man taking care to
 
 SOLDIER-LIFE. Ill 
 
 keep in feeling relation to his predecessor. We 
 plunged and floundered on through brush and brier, 
 deep creeks, and rising waters, mingled with drift 
 and ragged fragments of ice. Like Paul and his 
 shipmates, "we longed for the day;" but when 
 light broke upon us, it seemed to augment our 
 wretchedness by calling into painful exercise an ad- 
 ditional sense, and greatly enlarging the scene of 
 desolation. "We had frequently to pass through 
 what was called, in the provincialism of the front- 
 iers, "swales" standing ponds through which the 
 troops and packhors'es which had preceded us had 
 made a trail of shattered ice. Those swales were 
 often a quarter of a mile long. They were, more- 
 over, very unequal in their soundings. In common 
 they were not more than half-leg deep; but some- 
 times, at a moment when we were not expecting it, 
 we suddenly sank down to our cartridge-boxes. 
 While fording such places our feet would get so be- 
 numbed that we seemed to be walking on bundles 
 of rags; and it was really a luxury to come to a 
 parenthesis of mud and mire, for then we could feel 
 a returning glow of vitality. Occasionally a poor 
 packhorse would fall down in his track if tracks 
 there were to rise no more forever. It was heart- 
 rending to see them roll their flashing eyes indig- 
 nantly on the passing soldiers, as though to rebuke 
 the madness of the people in driving to such an 
 extremity of suffering. Droves of hogs, which had 
 been abandoned to the wilds, grim, gaunt, and hun-
 
 112 THE SWORD. 
 
 gry as the grave, were squealing through the 
 woods, and rooting up the snow; and under the 
 relentless scourge of war the whole creation seemed 
 to groan in pain. "We passed one of our subaltern 
 officers, who was trembling like an aspen, and be- 
 seeching every soldier for a dram, declaring that he 
 would perish in a few minutes if not supplied. 
 Poor fellow! he had been in the habit of keeping 
 himself always under the influence of liquor, and 
 his supply had failed him in this day of affliction. 
 By draining several canteens, he obtained enough 
 to drag him through the horrors of the day. Some 
 may think that we are exaggerating, but several of 
 our young men afterward fell victims to diseases 
 which were engendered by the march through the 
 Slack Swamp. 
 
 The reaching of Hull's road was a grand desider- 
 atum. It is true we had never heard it spoken of, 
 by those who had seen it, except in terms of unqual- 
 ified execration; but still it was a road, and there 
 was a kind of redeeming sound in the phrase that 
 struck pleasantly on the drum of our ear. At last 
 a triumphant peal in the van announced its appear- 
 ance. We were not slow in rushing to the point of 
 observation. But, ! the burst of indignation that 
 followed! Sure enough the Hull was there, and an 
 occasional patch of corduroy, and there had evi- 
 dently been an opening made through the dense 
 forest; but the road, if there ever had been any, 
 had been mostly washed away before our time.
 
 SOLDIER-LIFE. 113 
 
 
 
 The first night and day we traveled, through all 
 those disadvantages, thirty miles. At a late hour 
 we approached an arena which bore a strong resem- 
 blance to terra firma; and scraping away the snow, 
 we spread our blankets under the naked canopy of 
 heaven; for at the time of our departure from San- 
 dusky we had left our tents standing, with all our 
 camp equipage. How long we lay that night in a 
 shivering condition before we fell asleep we could 
 never ascertain; but I awoke in the morning from 
 pleasant dreams, and in a profuse perspiration, and, 
 as I thought, under a heavy press of blankets; but 
 when I threw up my arm to take an observation, 
 and to see how the land lay, an avalanche of virgin 
 snow, which had silently ministered to my comfort 
 during the night, tumbled into my bosom, and 
 quickly roused me to a recollection of my proper 
 latitude and true bearings, and I found, by calcula- 
 tion, that I was bounded north, south, east, and 
 west, by the Black Swamp. 
 
 Reader, bear with me, but I begin to feel sick 
 about my heart at the mere recollection of such 
 scenes. And besides all this I am sensible that I 
 have written enough for one chapter; but it would 
 savor of impoliteness to leave the readers of this 
 narrative so abruptly in the quagmire. Perhaps I 
 might give a more ship-shape finish by setting 
 them to read a short annual written by my brother, 
 which I received in those troublous days, and which 
 
 lightened up my own spirits while committing it to 
 
 10
 
 114 THE SWORD. 
 
 memory. It was in perfect tune with the times. 
 It runs thus: 
 
 Since now, my patrons, we have reason 
 
 T" exchange the hest salutes of the season 
 
 Since fate has granted that together 
 
 One year of wonders we should weather, 
 
 Mid comets, earthquakes, storms and all, 
 
 Along unhurt our course to roll; 
 
 And thereby hang some tales of humor, 
 
 But now, alas! put out of rumor, 
 
 By one continual din of war, 
 
 And heroes marching near and far, 
 
 To dress Montgomery's tomb ; 
 
 And brigadiers of sorry doom! 
 
 Then Harrison, in awful might, 
 
 Boldly rushing to the fight, 
 
 Bent on purpose grand and glorious, 
 
 His banners move in course victorious. 
 
 Not so was he who led the van, 
 
 A route the muse could never scan. 
 
 Through many a street and many an alley 
 
 Through many a wild, umbrageous valley, 
 
 His standard boastful threats conveyed, 
 
 And loud to arms the drumsticks played. 
 
 The sons of spunk obey the call, 
 
 And shoulder musket, one add all 
 
 To Campus Martius bend their way, 
 
 And soon are formed in proud array, 
 
 And hail the mighty battle day ! 
 
 Before the lines a curious creature, 
 
 With dappled shirt and hickory feature, 
 
 And pipe of true Moravian mold, 
 
 Thus broke in accents big and bold : 
 
 " I am ; believe me, 't is no rant 
 
 I am your noble commandant. 
 
 'T is true, I 'm not in style of war, 
 
 But that is well accounted for: 
 
 I 've lent my coat I 've lost my sash 
 
 My epaulets are in the wash 
 
 My sword I do not choose to trust 
 
 To run the hazard of a rust;
 
 SOLDIER-LIFE. 115 
 
 For bright it is, and well you know, 
 That while it 'a mine it shall be so. 
 
 These Indians look too nation red; 
 Our stomachs, too, are scarce of oread; 
 And, what is worse, we have forgot 
 To bring the powder and the shot. 
 So ground your arms, ye dirty pack ! 
 Let Dr. Eustis get you back." 
 So spite of frown, and spite of pout, 
 The word 's given, " To the sneak about!" 
 Go seek your hero at his home 
 Go seek him on the ocean foam ; 
 There British guineas can not gull, 
 And there Columbia owns her Hull.
 
 116 THE SWORD. 
 
 VIII. 
 
 SIEGE OF FORT MEIQS. 
 
 WE were writing something about Hull's road. 
 It was certainly an extraordinary structure. Here 
 and there we found a fragment of rail-road, not of 
 the modern, but Gothic order. But for the most of 
 the way the rails had been routed in disorder by 
 the swales, and scattered in every direction and 
 various forms, angular and triangular, vertical and 
 horizontal, visible and invisible, so that our ankles 
 at times appeared to be extremely loth to acknowl- 
 edge our footsteps. At other times we were scraped, 
 and snagged, and railed. And then we would get 
 our temper up and rail back again ; and it was rail- 
 ing against railing. Then old General Hull came 
 in for his share of blessings, and Winchester was 
 not forgotten. But our only hope was in progress; 
 and after a forced march, which could find no pro- 
 totype as we believed in the American Revolu- 
 tion, we joined the army on the banks of the Port- 
 age. As we marched in every man was presented 
 with a small glass of "high wine." When I drank 
 my allowance, it produced an indescribable titilla- 
 tion, reaching to the ends of my toes and fingers, 
 and appeared to spread a new world upon my vision.
 
 SIEGE OF FORT MEIGS. 117 
 
 I have for many years been a strenuous advocate 
 of the temperance cause; but whenever I hear a 
 lecturer say that spirits have never done good under 
 any circumstances, I deliberately enroll the dogma 
 with clairvoyance, witchcraft, and similar delusions. 
 It is true that strong drink has seldom done good. 
 And of all the drams that moistened my lips, before 
 I embraced religion, that alone can I remember 
 with complacency, because it was Scripturally 
 administered "to him who was ready to perish." 
 This is no argument for intemperance; for what 
 was that transient benefit in comparison with the 
 wide-spread ruin which overwhelmed many of our 
 company in after-life ? It was in the service that 
 some were initiated into, and others confirmed in 
 the habit of intemperance, which rapidly hurried 
 them on to the most deplorable destiny. And we 
 do most devoutly pray that the day may speedily 
 come, when Temperance will evaporate the last 
 intoxicating drop from earth by the brightness of 
 her shining. 
 
 It will be recollected that we had left all our 
 private stores behind, and had to commence on a 
 new issue of rations. Although the United States 
 owed us several successive back meals, yet these 
 were silently repudiated, and our allowance by no 
 means satisfied the demands of appetite. However, 
 we had ground to lie on, and rousing fires to cheer 
 us through the night. About midnight a sudden 
 volley of cries, wailings, and unearthly howlings
 
 118 THE SWORD. 
 
 broke from every quarter of the dense forest around 
 us. The raw troops, who had never experienced 
 any thing analogous, "in the void waste or in the 
 city full," took it for granted that all the northern 
 tribes were charging upon us, front, flank, and rear, 
 and they sprung to their feet. Pop ! pop ! pop ! 
 went the sentinels. "To arms! to arms!" cried the 
 officers; and in a few minutes all the brave reen- 
 forcement was found in battle array. Just then an 
 old veteran came snickering along the lines with 
 his forefinger on his nose: "Boys, did you never 
 hear the wolves howl before ?" It is wonderful how 
 those false alarms, frequently repeated, strengthen 
 the courage and improve the prudence of the sol- 
 dier! This, the first, was perhaps the greatest 
 alarm we had. It showed us how careless and how 
 unprepared we were. The scrambling and scuffling 
 in the dark, for our arms and accouterments, were 
 truly ludicrous. The interruption of rest added 
 keenness to our hunger, so that we were more than 
 prepared for our scanty allowance next morning. 
 The flour which each man received made a very 
 respectable biscuit when kneaded. The great diffi- 
 culty seemed to be as to the modus operandi of 
 cooking. Our culinary utensils were left behind, 
 and we had not as yet been let into the Indian 
 mode of twisting the dough around a stake, and 
 setting it up before the fire to roast. After a brief 
 consultation, we settled on the African method, and 
 concluded that we could get our cakes through in
 
 SIEGE OF FORT MEIGS. 119 
 
 the ash-pone style. So covering them cleverly with 
 ashes and embers, we were about to broil our pit- 
 tance of meat, when the drum suddenly beat to 
 arms. We buckled on our armor, hoping it was 
 some new-fashioned morning drill, or that some 
 general order was about to be promulged. It was 
 in vain for the subalterns to pass down the line 
 and say, "Dress dress dress by the right!" for 
 we could not keep our eyes from glancing askance 
 toward our smoking cakes, which we were fearful 
 were dressing too fast for the occasion. But what 
 was our extreme disappointment when the luckless 
 word came, and from high authority, "Bight face! 
 forward march !" Our legs, being as practiced as 
 stage-horses', began to beat time; but our eyes, 
 although carried away, still had independence 
 enough to cast " many a longing, lingering look 
 behind." Some of our boys, who seemed to be of 
 that class who have a free pass through the world, 
 "blow high, or blow low," dodged into the bush, as 
 we cleared the encampment, and returning to the 
 fires, gathered a rich harvest of ash-pone and spare- 
 ribs, and thus profited by the general calamity. 
 The majority, however, had a very afflicting march, 
 without tasting any food the whole day. The next 
 point of importance which we reached was the 
 Maumee, or the Miami of -the Lakes. Here the 
 army was halted awhile, as though to view the des- 
 olate prospect around. On the opposite bank stood 
 le ruins of the post that had lately been aban-
 
 120 THE SWORD. 
 
 doned. After a short consultation among the offi- 
 cers, we were marched down upon the frozen river, 
 in solid order, with all our heavy ordnance and 
 baggage, to proceed to the Foot of the Rapids. 
 Here we were presented with a lovely road, that 
 human ingenuity could not imitate. But we were 
 somewhat in the condition of old Bob Armstead, 
 who used to say, "When I was a young man, and 
 was poor, and had nothing to eat, I had a beautiful 
 set of teeth ; but now I am old and rolling in plenty, 
 not a tooth have I got." So when we were strong, 
 and had sufficient elasticity to march, we had no 
 roads to march on. But now, when we were 
 exhausted and starved, and could hardly drag one 
 foot after the other, we had as beautiful a turnpike 
 as Jack Frost could make. We were, however, 
 helped by the philosophy of a good man, who, when 
 he had the rheumatism, thanked the Lord it was 
 not the gout ; and when he had the gout, he was 
 thankful that it was not the gout and rheumatism 
 together. Late in the day our route lay through a 
 rich bottom, where there were about fifteen hund- 
 red bushels of corn standing. As soon as we entered 
 this inviting field the army broke in every direction, 
 like a drove of frightened cattle. Deaf to the com- 
 mands of our officers, and regardless of all military 
 order, we tore down the precious ears, and filled 
 our pockets and our bosoms till we were richly 
 laden with the spoils of the field. With the musket 
 in one hand, and an ear of corn in the other, we
 
 SIEGE OF FORT MEIGS. 121 
 
 marched on, greedily devouring the unstinted sup- 
 ply of a merciful Providence. No pound-cake ever 
 tasted half so delicious, till the wire-edge of our 
 starvation was worn off. We were amazed that we 
 had lived so long in the world, and had never dis- 
 covered before the transcendent luxury of raw corn. 
 Toward evening, we arrived at the Foot of the 
 Rapids, as it was then called. Here we were met 
 by an appalling object. Our rangers had brought 
 in the body of one who had a few days before left 
 our camp for Detroit, in company with Doctor 
 M'Heehan, under the protection of a white flag. 
 It seems they had stopped the first night on the 
 banks of the Maumee, and taken up their lodging 
 in an old cellar, which was all that remained of an 
 improvement which once occupied the site. Here 
 they were surprised by a party of Indians, the 
 Doctor taken prisoner, and his companion shot and 
 scalped. When we came up, we saw Major L., of 
 the Virginia militia, spreading himself over the 
 corpse, and with all the fervor and pathos of Mark 
 Antony, addressing his men, and calling upon them 
 to behold the cruelty of the savage foe, and to hate 
 their red-coat allies who had prompted them to the 
 revolting deed: "Drink in drink in the spirit of 
 noble revenge ! stiffen your sinews, summon up your 
 joints, and nerve your vengeful arms for deeds of 
 mighty daring!" Seeing several men turn away 
 sufficiently infuriated, I marched up to see if I 
 
 could be inspired with the same desirable ardor; 
 
 11
 
 122 THE SWOED. 
 
 for it seemed to be in horrid harmony with the 
 dreariness of the surrounding scenery. I looked 
 down upon the corpse, which wore all the freshness 
 and bloom of life, and contracted my muscles, and 
 clinched my teeth, and held my breath, and put 
 forth every device, mental and physical, in courting 
 the furies, but all to no purpose. I felt no fell 
 spirit of vengeance gnawing at my heart. Despite 
 of my late supply of provender, the sensation of 
 hunger was the dominant distress within. I saw 
 that it was sad butchery that had been perpetrated 
 by naked savages, who had been goaded and hunted 
 down themselves, like beasts of the forest. But the 
 sight neither augmented nor diminished the princi- 
 ple with which I set out the amor patrice which I 
 had drank in at my mother's breast nor did it 
 rouse me to emulate the barbarous example. And 
 this patriotism sustained us long after Major L. had 
 grounded his fury at his own peaceful fireside. 
 
 Here it was determined to take up our Winter 
 quarters. We formed a hollow square in a thick 
 grove, on the most commanding hill. We then had 
 to fell tree|, and throw a breastwork around the 
 whole army, before we were permitted to retire to 
 rest. As it regards regular meals, they were fast 
 going out of fashion; and that night supper was 
 postponed. After we were suffered to see to our- 
 selves, each mess kindled a princely fire; for what- 
 ever else might betide, we always had an enviable 
 supply of wood. We then sat down, in doleful
 
 SIEGE OF FOET MEIGS. 123 
 
 plight, to parch corn; and we comforted each other 
 by talking martially about Tapper's men, who "had 
 occupied that ground before us, and who had been 
 driven to such straits as to eat roasted hickory 
 roots. Our ambition rose no higher than parched 
 corn, till a luckless epicure exclaimed, "Boys, did 
 you ever hear of hog-meat and hominy?" "0! 
 don't mention hominy; you will make us squeal 
 right out." "Well, sirs, it is not only mentionable, 
 but it is highly feasible. Now, if you will only cast 
 in a generous contribution of corn, we '11 borrow a 
 camp-kettle, and make a royal mess of hominy." 
 Having been partly raised on hominy, we all un- 
 derstood very well how to dispose of the good dish 
 when cooked, but we had brought out no recipe 
 concerning the preparation. However, it was de- 
 cided, without a dissenting voice, that it must be 
 boiled. Moreover, we knew that we had taken the 
 first step right, according to Mrs. Glass we had 
 "caught" the corn. So at it we went. All other 
 business was suspended, and we laid as close siege 
 to the camp-kettle as ever Edward, King of En- 
 gland, did to Calais. Every hour or s<f we would 
 dip up a spoonful to try it; but it really appeared 
 that the longer we boiled it the harder it got. Wo 
 persevered till day dawned upon us, and then, to 
 our great mortification, found that we had not only 
 lost our corn, but our night's rest. 
 
 Our distressing march had closed; and for several 
 subsequent weeks we tasted the labors and fatigues
 
 124 THE SWORD. 
 
 of a soldier's life. The troops were employed daily 
 in digging trenches, felling trees, splitting logs, 
 setting up picketing, raising block-houses, and doing 
 every kind of work that was necessary to fortify 
 our post, which embraced nine acres, and which, 
 when finished, was called "Fort Meigs" This sea- 
 son of fatigue was replete with hardships, especially 
 as it was in the depth of Winter, and accompanied 
 with many privations. However, our bodies and 
 minds were actively employed, which rendered our 
 condition far preferable to that which immediately 
 followed; for having finished the public and private 
 work which was necessary to make our quarters 
 tolerable, if not comfortable, a state of indolence 
 and inactivity succeeded that was highly deleterious 
 to the army. The Winter was unusually severe, 
 even on the frontiers. One unfortunate sentinel 
 froze at his post in less than two hours. We here 
 had an opportunity of testing the mistaken policy 
 of some fond parents, who think that they have 
 accomplished a stroke of generalship, when they 
 hide their children from the contagious disorders 
 which occasionally visit their neighborhood. Num- 
 bers were swept off by the mumps, measles, hoop- 
 ing-cough, and other distempers, which came upon 
 them at this unpropitious time and place, where 
 there was little remedy and less medical skill, and 
 where the soft hand of the warm-hearted mother, 
 and the sleepless solicitude of the affectionate sister 
 could not reach them. They died daily. The
 
 SIEGE OF FORT MEIGS. 125 
 
 mournful air of "Roslin Castle" became the pre- 
 vailing music of the day, while the sharp rifle-cracks 
 of the platoon told how many were borne to their 
 long home. A deadly homesickness overwhelmed 
 our troops, and we believe a repentance of war was 
 kindled in every bosom, from the highest to the 
 lowest. 
 
 Some stirring incident would occasionally occur, 
 as a kind of ennui-breaker, and rouse us from our 
 torpor. At one time our spies brought intelligence 
 that a party of about seven hundred Indians were 
 diverting themselves with a war-dance on the ice, 
 near the mouth of the river. In the dusk of the 
 evening, General Harrison, at the head of fifteen 
 hundred troops, started for the party, although not 
 particularly invited. At a late hour in the night 
 the blazing fires of the enemy appeared on the bank 
 of the river. We were now wide awake. The day 
 of battle, about which so much had been said, was 
 now right before us. The detachment, thrown into 
 a crescent, with the artillery in the center, cau- 
 tiously approached. We found the fires burning 
 bright with recent fuel; but the Indians had fled. 
 This disappointment was probably owing to our im- 
 prudence in marching on the river. It is said that 
 an Indian, by laying his ear flat on the ice, can 
 discover the approach of a large force five miles 
 distant. 
 
 It was now announced that those who were sick 
 or exhausted might tarry by the fires till morning.
 
 126 THE SWORD. 
 
 Some were so completely worn out that they not 
 only accepted the boon, but threw themselves down 
 by the fires, and, without a sentinel to guard the 
 camp, fell into a profound sleep. For my own part, 
 I felt that my strength was almost gone; but some 
 very forcible questions presented themselves to my 
 mind; such as, how far had the wily enemy re- 
 treated? Might they not now be lurking in the 
 dark forest before us, watching all our movements? 
 Again I rubbed the crown of my head, and con- 
 cluded to value my scalp at a higher price of suffer- 
 ing than had yet been realized. It also occurred 
 that I was not made of softer clay than my fellows, 
 and that there was a point of endurance beyond 
 which none could go a point at which the officers 
 themselves must succumb. So I would not report 
 myself among either the sick, the lame, or the lazy. 
 The General, being disappointed in the matter of 
 the dance, concluded to proceed on to the River 
 Eaisin, and to bury our dead, who had been inhu- 
 manly left on the field, and were now "bleaching 
 in the northern blast." He, therefore, sent back to 
 Meigs for sleds, pickaxes, spades, etc., and the main 
 body moved on. The frozen face of the river was 
 an unbroken level. It had been put into excellent 
 order by a previous sprinkle of snow. There was 
 no impediment in our way to call for vigilance. 
 The companies marched in very compact order, 
 each man being partially sustained by his comrades. 
 These circumstances, together with the uniform and
 
 SIEGE OF FORT MEIGS. 127 
 
 monotonous tread of the troops, acting on men so 
 enervated, induced an unconquerable drowsiness. 
 Numbers slept as they marched along. Some pla- 
 toons, thus dozing, so far diverged from their course 
 as to lose their companies, and mix with strange 
 columns. I not only slept myself, but had short, 
 distinct dreams. In this way we marched all 
 night. About day-break we began to approach the 
 lake. The ice had evidently become softer. We 
 pressed on till our way became quite sloppy. We 
 persevered, however, till the wheels of our six- 
 pounder broke through the ice. The expedition 
 was then abandoned. The troops were marched to 
 a projecting point of land, where we had a short 
 intermission. About thirty minutes were spent in 
 dozing or eating, as drowsiness or hunger prevailed, 
 when we were again beat to arms, and marched 
 back to our fort, where we arrived late in the even- 
 ing, having marched sixty-four miles in twenty-two 
 consecutive hours. The detachment was so pros- 
 trated, that it was exonerated from all military 
 duty for several days. 
 
 The cheerless and wearisome- months of Winter 
 rolled heavily along. At last some faint indications 
 of Spring began to appear. One afternoon, as num- 
 bers were gathered together on the " parade," two 
 strangers, finely mounted, appeared on the western 
 bank of the river, and seemed to be taking a very 
 calm and deliberate survey of our works. It was a 
 strange thing to see travelers in that wild country,
 
 128 THE SWORD. 
 
 and we commonly held such to be enemies, till they 
 proved themselves to be friends. So one of our bat- 
 teries was cleared forthwith, and the gentlemen 
 were saluted with a shot that tore up the earth 
 about them, and put them to a hasty flight. If 
 that ball had struck its mark much bloodshed might 
 have been prevented; for we learned subsequently 
 that our illustrious visitors were Proctor and Te- 
 cumseh. The garrison was immediately employed 
 in cutting deep traverses through the fort, taking 
 down the tents, and preparing for a siege. The 
 work accomplished in a few hours, under the excits- 
 ment of the occasion, was prodigious. The grand 
 traverse being completed, each mess was ordered to 
 excavate, under the embankment, suitable lodgings, 
 as substitutes for our tents. Those rooms were shot- 
 proof, and bomb-proof, except in the event of a 
 shell falling in the traverse, and at the mouth of a 
 cave. This gave occasion, in the course of the siege, 
 for an English officer, who had been taken prisoner, 
 and returned on parole, to say to his general, "It is 
 powder and shot thrown away to fire at that fort. 
 I can compare the Americans to nothing but an 
 army of ground-hogs. As soon as a sentinel cries, 
 'Shot,' every man dodges under ground; and the 
 ball has scarcely swept over the ground before they 
 are on their feet again, inquiring into the damage." 
 This observation of our prisoner was true, as it 
 regarded that portion of our men who were not on 
 duty for the time being. But the shot did consid-
 
 SIEGE OF PORT MEIGS. 129 
 
 erable damage to those who were necessarily at 
 their posts. 
 
 The above works were scarcely completed before 
 it was discovered that the enemy, under cover of 
 night, had constructed batteries, on a commanding 
 hill, west of the river. There their artillery-men 
 were posted; but the principal part of their army 
 occupied the old English fort below. Their Indian 
 allies appeared to have a roving commission; for 
 they beset us on every side. The cannonading com- 
 menced in good earnest on both sides. It was, 
 however, more constant on the British side, because 
 they had a more extensive mark to batter. We 
 had nothing to fire at but their batteries; but they 
 were coolly and deliberately attended to; and it was 
 believed that more than one of their guns were dis- 
 mounted during the siege. One of our militia-men 
 took his station on the embankment, and gratui- 
 tously forewarned us of every shot. In this he be- 
 came so skillful that he could, in almost every case, 
 predict the destination of the ball. As soon as the 
 smoke issued from the muzzle of the gun he would 
 cry out "shot," or "bomb," as the case might be. 
 Sometimes he would exclaim, "Block-house No. 1," 
 or, "Look out, main battery;" "Now for the meat- 
 house;" "Good-by, if you will pass." In spite of 
 all the expostulations of his friends, he maintained 
 his post. One day there came a shot that seemed 
 to defy all his calculations. He stood silent mo- 
 tionless perplexed. In the same instant he was
 
 130 THE SWORD. 
 
 swept into eternity. Poor man! he should have 
 considered that when there was no obliquity in the 
 issue of the smoke, either to the right or left, above 
 or below, the fatal messenger would travel in the 
 direct line of his vision. He reminded me of the 
 peasant, in the siege of Jerusalem, who cried out, 
 "Woe to the city! woe to the temple! woe to my- 
 self!" On the most active day of the investment 
 there was as many as five hundred cannon-balls 
 and bombs thrown at our fort. Meantime, the In- 
 dians, climbing up into the trees, fired incessantly 
 upon us. Such was their distance, that many of 
 their balls barely reached us, and fell harmless to the 
 ground. Occasionally they inflicted dangerous and 
 even fatal wounds. The number killed in the fort 
 was small, considering the profusion of powder and 
 ball expended on us. About eighty were slain, 
 many wounded, and several had to sufier the ampu- 
 tation of limbs. The most dangerous duty which 
 we performed within the precincts of the fort was in 
 covering the magazine. Previous to this the powder 
 had been deposited in wagons, and these stationed 
 in the traverse. Here there was no security against 
 bombs. It was therefore thought to be prudent to 
 remove the powder into a small block-house, and 
 cover it with earth. The enemy, judging our 
 design from our movements, now directed all their 
 shot to this point. Many of their balls were red-hot. 
 Wherever they struck they raised a cloud of smoke, 
 and made a frightful hissing. An officer passing
 
 SIEGE OF FORT MEIGS. 131 
 
 our quarters, said, "Boys, who will volunteer to 
 cover the magazine?" Fool-like, away several of us 
 went. As soon as we reached the spot, there came 
 a ball and took off one man's head. The spades 
 and dirt flew faster than any of us had before wit- 
 nessed. In the midst of our job a bomb-shell fell on 
 the roof, and lodging on one of the braces, it spun 
 round for a moment. Every soldier fell prostrate 
 on his face, and with breathless horror awaited the 
 vast explosion, which we expected would crown all 
 our earthly sufferings. Only one of all the gang 
 presumed to reason on the case. He silently argued 
 that, as the shell had not bursted as quick as usual, 
 there might be something wrong in its arrangement. 
 If it bursted where it was, and the magazine ex- 
 ploded, there could be no escape: it was death any- 
 how; so he sprung to his feet, seized a boat-hook, 
 and pulling the hissing missile to the ground, and 
 jerking the smoking match from its socket, discov- 
 ered that the shell was filled with inflammable mat- 
 ter, which, if once ignited, would have wrapped the 
 whole building in a sheet of flame. This circum- 
 stance added wings to our shovels; and we were 
 right glad when the officer said, "That will do: go 
 to your lines." When retired to my cool subter- 
 ranean lodge, I called a meeting of the whole cabi- 
 net of "Mansoul;" in which, after considerable dis- 
 cussion, the following preamble and resolution were 
 unanimously adopted: 
 
 " Whereas, Volunteering is a mere work of super-
 
 132 THE SWORD. 
 
 erogation, and commonly founded on animal pas- 
 sions, and, moreover, brings no revenue of respect 
 to our judgment; therefore, 
 
 "Resolved, That this shall be the last volunteer 
 service with us, come what will." 
 
 To this I have strictly adhered, both in State and 
 Church. Indeed, in our Church, where there is 
 such stupendous locomotive power, volunteering is 
 truly ridiculous. Although I have generally gone 
 where the determinate council have sent me, yet 
 I still cherish an abiding and habitual diffidence 
 about flourishing in a "forlorn hope. 1 ' 
 
 The siege still went on with various success on 
 both sides, the enemy becoming more formidable 
 by experience and practice, till the fifth of May. 
 We will begin with that day by saying it was set 
 apart by the authorities of the State of Ohio, as a 
 day of fasting, humiliation, and prayer. The infi- 
 del may say, "Pshaw! that was only accidental." 
 But if that said infidel will take the pains to ex- 
 amine the papers and journals of the times, he 
 will find that nearly all the victories which were 
 gained in the last war, by the American arms, were 
 gained on fast-days. On the fifth of May, a ree'n- 
 forcement, under General Clay, was descending the 
 Maumee. The previous evening Harrison had sent 
 a confidential officer to meet the force, and give 
 them the plan of operation. A division of the body 
 'was to land on the western shore, and by a rapid 
 and secret march come down upon the enemy's bat-
 
 SIEGE OF FORT MEIGS. 133 
 
 teries, spike their cannons, and then retreat down 
 to the river under cover of our guns, till they could 
 be transported to the fort. The other division was 
 to make their way down the river, in their boats, 
 to the garrison. As soon as this last division came 
 in sight on the rapids, they attracted the sole atten- 
 tion of the armies on both sides of the river. Meet- 
 ing with some obstructions in the river, they were 
 obliged to land. This they did under a heavy fire 
 from the Indians on the eastern shore. A detach- 
 ment, embracing our company, was marched out of 
 the fort, to cover the Kentuckians who were coming 
 in. With little loss they entered the fort. 
 
 As soon as we had retired to the garrison, the 
 Petersburg, the Pittsburg, and Greensburg volun- 
 teers, with some companies of regulars, and Captain 
 Sebree's brave militia, numbering, in all, four hund- 
 red men, were drawn up in a deep ravine outside 
 of the picketing, preparatory to a sortie. The ob- 
 ject was to destroy a battery which had been con- 
 structed on our side of the river, which had done 
 us much harm, and which was supported by fifteen 
 hundred Indians. The sally was also to be so timed 
 as to divert the attention of the enemy from the 
 approach of Dudley's command, that was slyly steal- 
 ing upon them. The few moments immediately 
 preceding the battle are, of all others, the most 
 awful. Then the soldier is capable of reflection, 
 and the mental vessel, under the high pressure, 
 moves fast. To counteract this, our first lieuten-
 
 134 THE SWORD. 
 
 ant, who had been nicknamed "Old Sluefoot," 
 passed up and down our line, encouraging the men. 
 He was a wicked man, but had so many good traits 
 withal, that he was very popular. "Boys," said 
 he, "when they give the word, do you all rush with 
 a tremendous shout." And then he exclaimed with 
 an awful oath, that there was nothing under heaven 
 like a shout. At last the word was given the 
 charge made. As we cleared the ravine the whole 
 forest was in a blaze. The continuous roar of the 
 rifles was like the long roll of the drum no inter- 
 mission. The balls flew like hailstones pish 
 pish ^pish; now and then rap rap. In our pas- 
 sage to the woods we became exposed to the British 
 battery on the other side of the river. They were 
 not slow in playing their artillery on us; but we 
 heard it not we felt it not we saw it not. With 
 a blazing line before us, and a crowd of anxious 
 witnesses in the fort behind, we had no time for 
 way-side chitchat and lateral sallies. Those who 
 were in the fort said it was amazing to see how the 
 balls plowed up the earth about our heels, and with 
 what little effect. But while the foe were engaged 
 in this very act, Dudley's Kentuckians rushed down 
 upon their rear, took their batteries, and spiked 
 their guns. If they had then retreated to the river, 
 according to orders, happy would it have been for 
 them. But, unfortunately, the Indian yell was 
 raised in the forest. That was more than a Ken- 
 tucky ear could bear. Our victors rushed to meet
 
 SIEGE OF FORT MEIGS. 135 
 
 their mortal foe, and a general slaughter ensued. 
 After the siege, while gathering up the dead, in 
 several places were found the white and red man, 
 as they had fallen in single combat, locked in deadly 
 strife. This imprudence was not confined to raw 
 troops. There was too much of it on our side of 
 the river; for when our sortie was crowned with 
 success, the eastern battery destroyed, and thirty 
 artillery-men, with two officers, taken prisoners, 
 our soldiers continued to drive the Indians till we 
 were beguiled about three-quarters of a mile into 
 the woods, and the enemy began to outflank, and 
 get between us and our works. In this move Se- 
 bree's company became surrounded; but they fought 
 desperately at close quarters, muzzle to muzzle, and 
 hatchet to hatchet, till a regular company cut a 
 passage through. This militia company suffered 
 more than all the rest of the detachment. "We, 
 however, considered that victory was on our side; 
 for we retreated into a fort that was now compara- 
 tively safe. The enemy's guns were all silenced, 
 and if they continued the siege, their only hope 
 could be in storming, and this was most ardently 
 desired on our side. "We were afterward informed 
 by deserters that this was their intention. The 
 English general had engaged the Indians to assist 
 him in this work at the breaking of the day. 
 Some barrels of whisky, as part and parcel of the 
 contract, were issued to the savages that evening, 
 and they spent the night in drinking and torturing
 
 136 THE SWORD. 
 
 the unhappy prisoners who had fallen into their 
 hands. At the same time the company of Irishmen 
 that we carried into Meigs, were treated with 
 American hospitality, and regularly drew their ra- 
 tions, even to their whisky. They were profuse in 
 their expressions of gratitude, and their tongues 
 moved as on a pivot. Just before day-break Proctor 
 sent for the Indian chiefs, and asked them if they 
 were all ready for the storm. They answered, "All 
 ready ! S'pose you take your braves and go before, 
 and drive your nails into the big guns, as Kantuc 
 serve you; then we come Indian much strong!" 
 This the English were not disposed to do. The 
 next morning the dissatisfied Indians began to file 
 off by companies and tribes; and the English gen- 
 eral becoming alarmed, hastily raised the siege, and 
 retreated, leaving much of his baggage behind. 
 
 None of our company were left on the field. 
 About twenty-five were wounded some of them 
 dangerously who recovered; and six died of their 
 wounds. These added to the sixteen, whose deaths 
 might be traced to their exposure in the Black 
 Swamp, made our total loss twenty-two. 
 
 When I look back at all through which we 
 passed, it seems to me a mystery of God's goodness 
 that I was spared. But this mystery, reader, is 
 partially solved by the reflection, that I had a pious 
 and praying mother, who pleaded for the prodigal, 
 day and night, with strong cries and tears. When 
 the news reached P , that there had been an
 
 SIEGE OF FORT MEIGS. 137 
 
 engagement at Fort Meigs, and that many of the 
 volunteers were wounded, and some killed, my 
 mother was sorely afflicted. The sound of every 
 footstep on the threshold harrowed up her soul. 
 She could not think of stepping out for fear of evil 
 tidings. And what made it still more distressing 
 was, that it was her regular class day. From the 
 means of grace she was not to be driven by the 
 smiles of friends or frowns of enemies. To her 
 closet she fled, and while wrapped up in a conflict 
 of prayer, she said, and / believed her, that God 
 gave her a comfortable assurance that all was well. 
 She now went forth to her class meeting. As she 
 passed down the street, the postmaster, who had 
 been a schoolmate of mine, ran to the door, with 
 tears in his eyes, and said, "Mrs. L., I have just 
 heard from the army; my poor brother John is 
 killed; but, thank God! Alfred is safe." Under the 
 mingling emotions of sympathy and gratitude, she 
 burst into tears, and as soon as utterance was 
 given, answered, "Mr. S., truly I feel with you the 
 loss of your excellent brother; but the Lord had 
 before given me the most satisfactory assurances in 
 regard to my son." So she hastened on to her 
 class, and in the bosom of an affectionate and pray- 
 ing Church buried all her sorrows. And I do 
 believe that if I could live to be as old as Methusa- 
 lah, I should still be childish enough if childish it 
 
 be to say, blessed be God for a praying mother! 
 12
 
 138 THE SWORD. 
 
 IX. 
 
 
 
 THE SEQUEL AT FORT MEIGS. 
 
 OUR readers will perceive that, to the raising of 
 the siege of Fort Meigs, our campaign was nothing 
 but a scene of suffering and toil, with the exception 
 of our gala promenade to Chillicothe. "We have yet 
 to speak of the slain, the wounded, and the dying, 
 as these must be taken into the account in reckon- 
 ing the cost. After the sortie, we visited the hos- 
 pital. Reclining on a bed in one corner lay a gal- 
 lant officer, who was attached to the engineer de- 
 partment. He had rendered much service from the 
 beginning of the war, and his courage was unques- 
 tionable. But now, in consequence of the irritation 
 of his nerves by the roar of artillery, the bursting 
 of bombs, the pain of his wounds, and his feverish 
 condition, he had become as timid and as peevish as 
 a child, and was constantly apprehensive of being 
 torn to pieces by a cannon-ball. 
 
 "Lord, what is man! poor, feeble man! 
 Formed of the dust at first." 
 
 Stretched on a pallet lay Captain Jack Shore, "the 
 darling of our crew." He had formerly commanded 
 a merchantman; and although only a private in our
 
 THE SEQUEL AT FORT METGS. 139 
 
 company, and a sailor withal, he was better quali- 
 fied for a military officer than any man in our 
 corps. But he was a sailor ; and that, in the land- 
 lubber's vocabulary, implies every thing that is 
 awkward and back-handed, on horse or foot. He 
 was related to General Harrison, and had more 
 than once taken tea with his distinguished cousin, 
 "sub rosa," in the grand marquee. At the com- 
 mencement of the cannonading, he had solicited a 
 station in one of the principal batteries, and han- 
 dled the big guns to admiration. One of the guns 
 was dismounted by a shot from the cjnemy, and an 
 iron splinter pierced his leg. It was immediately 
 extracted. The wound was considered unimportant, 
 and was slightly bandaged. However, in a few 
 hours it became distressingly painful, and he retired 
 to the hospital. He was now suffering in the last 
 stage of lock-jaw. In his spasmodic agony, the 
 smoke of his torment literally rose in a mist from 
 his blanket. We gave him a hot bath, but to no 
 purpose; he sank in death, lamented by all. 
 
 In another corner lay the handsome and delicate 
 Cluff, mortally wounded. He was earnestly begging 
 a messmate to read to him. In this he was grati- 
 fied. We can not recollect the book that was used, 
 but remember well noticing at the time that it was 
 not a religious work. His comrade would read a 
 few lines, and then ask him how he liked it. With 
 a vacant stare he would shake his head, but imme- 
 diately repeat, "Bead, read." The thought struck
 
 140 THE SWORD. 
 
 me at the time that it was the Word of life which 
 he wished to hear from, in that trying hour, but 
 that he had not yet reached that point of contrition 
 which would embolden him to express the humilia- 
 ting request. And, alas! alas! I had not moral 
 courage to direct him to a source of comfort which 
 had been so shamefully neglected by myself. 
 
 In a tent, surrounded by his affectionate mess, 
 was nursed the brave, intelligent, and well-educated 
 Booker. He spoke of death, not only with com- 
 posure, but sometimes with exultation. His hope 
 was cheering; but it soon appeared, from his con- 
 versation, that it rested on the common opiate of 
 dying soldiers : he was dying for his country. Al- 
 though my stock of theological lore was very scant, 
 yet it showed me that this would not do; but I 
 durst not point him to a better foundation, lest he 
 might say, ironically, but justly, "Physician, heal 
 thyself." Precious young man ! he was, doubtless, 
 less faulty than myself. He felt that he was con- 
 summating the work which God had given him to 
 do, by sacrificing himself on the altar of his country, 
 while " I knew my duty, but I did it not." We 
 have not time to speak particularly of our fallen 
 comrades. There they lie, each in his dusty bed, 
 deep in the cold banks of the Maumee, awaiting 
 the grand reveille that will usher in the day-break 
 of immortality, " which shall their flesh restore." 
 But, in seeing all this, the impression fastened on 
 my mind, and revolving years have not erased it,
 
 THE SEQUEL AT FORT MEIGS. 141 
 
 that if there is any situation whi<!h calls loudly for 
 a pious, industrious, and self-denying minister of 
 Christ, it is the army. 
 
 We have before us a communication, lately 
 received from the Peace Society. We cordially 
 agree with it, that the spirit of Christianity is the 
 spirit of peace. We are, moreover, highly delighted 
 with the project of a grand court of arbitration, 
 governed by well-defined international laws, to set- 
 tle differences that may arise between governments. 
 We believe that the common safety and interests 
 of all nations may yet prompt them to establish 
 such a tribunal. And if the Peace Society stood 
 upon the high resolve, 1. To do all that we right- 
 eously and consistently can to prevent war; 2. To 
 do all that we possibly can to mitigate its evils, when 
 it does come, and labor by all justifiable means to 
 restore peace ; we see no cause why the whole 
 Christian community might not advocate it. But 
 we really fear, from a perusal of its documents, 
 that it leans to ultraism: 
 
 1. Because it claims too much to be the sum- 
 mum bonum the "land's-end" of all conservative 
 virtue. It boasts of controlling the press. " It has 
 waked up the pulpit." Waked up the pulpit, 
 indeed! Were it not for the pulpit, and its asso- 
 ciate means of grace, all divinely instituted, we 
 doubt whether a Peace Society would have ever 
 been mentioned on the continent of America. This 
 is the first emanation we have received from the
 
 THE SWORD. 
 
 said society, and yet our conscience bears us witness 
 that we have, according to the grace given, preached 
 peace by Jesus Christ for, lo ! these twenty years 
 and more. 
 
 2. Because its morality outstrips the Bible, and 
 even leaves its Divine Author in the dark distance. 
 The Peace Advocate holds that the time is coming 
 when no conscientious minister can officiate as a 
 chaplain in the army. Surely that will be a day 
 of high lustration! a day when mortal man will be 
 too conscientious to preach for Christ at all; for he 
 requires his ministers to preach the Gospel to every 
 creature to the civilized and the barbarian to the 
 master and the servant to the sailor and the sol- 
 dier. Did our Lord's commission embrace the sol- 
 dier? We judge so from his practice. "When a 
 centurion sent for him to minister to his family, 
 our Savior promptly answered the call. And when 
 the centurion, on second thought, feared he had 
 ventured too much, and sent a messenger to modify 
 the request, our Lord turned to his followers and 
 said, "Verily, I have not found so great faith; no, 
 not in Israel ;" not even in his own apostles. Again, 
 the first Gospel sermon that was preached to the 
 Gentiles was particularly addressed to Cornelius, a 
 centurion of the band, called the Italian band, and 
 his devout soldiers. And this by the special com- 
 mand of Heaven. In all probability it was preached 
 in the barracks. It is true, all this was before the 
 Peace Advocate had waked up the pulpit. We hope
 
 THE SEQUEL AT FORT MEIGS. 143 
 
 the time will never come when ministers of the 
 Gospel will be so tender in conscience as not to go 
 any where this side of hell to save souls from per- 
 dition. 
 
 3. Because it claims affinity, or seeks partnership 
 with every one who will in any wise promote its 
 design. The flowers of Pettit are quoted to prove 
 the inconsistency of acting as a chaplain in the 
 army. We wonder that the Peace Society could not 
 see that Mr. Pettit was more intent on degrading 
 the Christian religion than promoting peace. He 
 was trying to show what a poor, weak, pusillani- 
 mous thing Christianity is how it creates a super- 
 stitious conscience, that "makes cowards of us all." 
 This was just what we might expect infidelity to 
 throw out in her pangs of expiration. But the 
 Peace Society will not soon swell its ranks with 
 Christian men and women, if it expects them to 
 enlist at the enormous expense of underwriting the 
 Pettit parole. Christianity make cowards of sol- 
 diers ! Time and experience have each placed a 
 foot on that gross libel. Did religion make cowards 
 of the Methodist soldiers in the battle of Fontenoy ? 
 No. One of the society cried out with holy joy, as 
 he marched into the field of battle, "I am going to 
 rest in the bosom of Jesus." Others, when they 
 fell, covered with wounds, exclaimed, "I am going 
 to my beloved." Others, "Come, Lord Jesus, come 
 quickly!" When William Clements had his arm 
 broken by a musket-ball, they would have carried
 
 144 THE SWORD. 
 
 him out of the battle; but he said, "No, I have an 
 arm left yet to hold a sword; I will not go." When 
 a second shot broke his other arm, he said, "I am 
 as happy as I can be out- of paradise." John Evans, 
 having both his legs taken off by a cannon-ball, was 
 laid across a cannon to die, where, as long as he 
 could speak, he was praising God with joyful lips. 
 John Haine, of the cavalry, filled with an assurance 
 of Divine protection, cried out, "The French have 
 no~ ball molded and billeted to touch my life this 
 day." After seven hours' hard fighting, a cannon- 
 ball struck his horse from under him, and down he 
 tumbled in the dust. An officer cried at the top 
 of his voice, "Haine, where is your God now?" 
 Springing again to his feet, he replied, "Sir, he is 
 here with me, and he will bring me out of this 
 battle." Presently there came a ball and took the 
 officer's head off. 0! these simple-hearted Chris- 
 tians carried their Bibles in their knapsacks. Their 
 conscience was not shaped by lectures, and pream- 
 bles, and resolutions, all tending to canonize and 
 deify one Christian grace at the expense of all 
 others, or to exalt one Bible duty as a commutation 
 for the rest. They feared God and honored the 
 king. They rendered unto Ccesar the things that 
 are Caesar's, and unto God the things that are 
 God's. And yet, even in the army, they were a pe- 
 culiar people ; for while the soldiers were gathering 
 watches and jewels on the battle-field, and said to 
 them, " Come, will ye not fly upon the spoil ?" their 

 
 THE SEQUEL AT FORT MEIGS. 145 
 
 noble answer was, "We have Christ in our hearts; 
 we desire no plunder." They believed that, in 
 their peculiar place, it was their duty to fight for 
 their king and country; but they knew that it was 
 no duty to God or their country to plunder the dead. 
 But to resume: 
 
 After the hasty retreat of the enemy, a detach- 
 ment was sent out to scour the woods, and gather 
 up the dead. They brought in a great number, and 
 spread them out before one of the gates. They 
 had been abused and mutilated in a most shocking 
 manner. About midnight it fell to my lot to stand 
 a lonely sentinel over this ghastly, silent congrega- 
 tion. The stars shone sufficiently bright to give 
 effect to the scene. As I looked down upon them, 
 I became more astonished at myself than any other 
 part of the creation. I felt truly like an apostate 
 from human nature. A few months before I could 
 not feel comfortable in the idea of sleeping alone. 
 The sight of a corpse could once afford me subject- 
 matter of trembling for weeks to come. Even in 
 the Black Swamp I had a tear to spare to the 
 expiring pack-horse. But now, at this lonely hour, 
 while all the army were wrapped in sleep, except 
 a few widely-scattered sentinels, I could look down 
 on this ghastly, disfigured group, without even a 
 tremor stealing over my nerves. I found that my 
 heart had become wretchedly hardened by the 
 scenes, sufferings, and conflicts of war. What par- 
 ticularly afflicted me was, I thought that all the 
 
 io
 
 146 THE SWORD. 
 
 social feelings and sympathies of my soul were 
 clean gone forever; that I should no more feel 
 with those who feel, or weep with those who weep. 
 But I found subsequently that in this I was mis- 
 taken. After I returned to the pacific relations of 
 life, the kindred streams gushed back, I was re- 
 stored to the fellowship of humanity, and more 
 glory be to God ! through whose mercy the day-star 
 from on high hath visited my soul admitted to the 
 communion of saints, and the household of faith. 
 
 The next day, after laying out the dead as de- 
 cently as circumstances would admit, we committed 
 them to the earth. Then all the cannon around 
 the fort were fired in slow and solemn succession, 
 while the wild and unpeopled banks of the Maumee 
 echoed and reechoed the funeral honors to the dis- 
 tant lake. 
 
 Our army was now restrained from further opera- 
 tions by the War Department, till the contemplated 
 battle on the Lake. As Perry stood in need of 
 men, there was another beat for volunteers in the 
 fort. This matter was not without its temptations. 
 But I rigidly declined for the following reasons: 
 
 1. I remembered burying the magazine, and the 
 subsequent pledge. It was said, a bad promise is 
 better broken than kept. Yes, but there lay "the 
 rub;" I was not yet convinced that it was a bad 
 promise. 
 
 2. I rather suspected that there would be hotter 
 times on the lake than we had seen yet; and I had
 
 THE SEQUEL AT FOET MEIGS. 147 
 
 never vaunted myself on a surplus of courage. It 
 is true, I had heretofore felt a kind of fear I will 
 not call it cowardice, lest it should involve too 
 many a fear of public opinion a fear of disgrac- 
 ing myself, my family, my country, etc., which had 
 answered as an excellent substitute for courage, and 
 had borne me up in all our sufferings and dangers 
 thus far; but I had not sounded all its depth and 
 shoal; and how it would work when we came to be 
 grappled yard-arm and yard-arm, I could not tell. 
 
 3. I could not bear the idea of being recognized by 
 some old salt, perhaps some shipmate, under a sol- 
 dier's coat, as I knew the standing antipathy of a 
 sailor to my temporary profession. If they had held 
 out, on a pole, a suit of blue, jacket and trowsers, 
 with a neat tarpaulin, it is probable that all the 
 other scruples of this soldier might have fled, and 
 he might have snapped at the bait. But, avast! 
 As I had started on a land cruise, I thought it was 
 best to end iet before engaging in new enterprises. 
 
 Soon after this the fort was broken up, or reduced 
 to an inconsiderable post, and the army was con- 
 centrated at Camp Seneca. Here a poor deserter 
 was brought in. He was a young man of agreeable 
 appearance. The court-martial condemned him to 
 be shot. The sad day arrived. The whole army 
 was paraded and formed into a semi-square. The 
 executive platoon was marched out. The unhappy 
 culprit was blindfolded and seated with his back 
 against a stump. A deadly silence pervaded the
 
 148 THE SWORD. 
 
 whole host. Harrison, in full uniform, towered in 
 the midst. I was near enough to the condemned to 
 observe that he trembled like an aspen, and writhed 
 in all the bitterness of hopeless death. The thrill- 
 ing word was given, "Make ready! take aim!" 
 Here the General waved his hand to the officer, and 
 announced to the trembling deserter that his sin was 
 forgiven. He then solemnly raised his right hand 
 to heaven, and pledged himself, before the Lord of 
 hosts, and God of the armies of heaven, that the 
 next deserter who should be condemned by a court- 
 martial should die. Harrison was always beloved 
 by his men, but never did he appear more majestic 
 or more lovely than he did on that occasion. 
 The poor young man seemed for a while petrified, 
 and utterly incapable of comprehending the sum of 
 benevolence; but when restored to his quarters he 
 gave loose to the most unbounded joy. The next 
 day he was employed on fatigue, in driving an ox 
 cart. As he went, he leaped, and danced, and sung, 
 and squealed, and seemed to be seeking, in every 
 member, every faculty, every sense, for some vital 
 testimony that he was alive, and not dead.
 
 ENEMY PURSUED. 149 
 
 ENEMY PURSUED-DISCHARGED- 
 HOME. 
 
 THE news of Perry's victory set every thing in 
 motion again. The army was marched down to 
 Sandusky Bay, and thence transported by boats to 
 Put-in Bay, a beautiful harbor formed on the bosom 
 of the lake by the position of some islands. In 
 this bay lay the American squadron, with its cap- 
 tured fleet, entirely land-locked. It was distressing, 
 in the dark watches of the night, to hear the ago- 
 nizing groans of the wounded and dying on board 
 the hospital-ship, who had suffered in the late con- 
 flict. On these islands we rested a few days. While 
 here, another deserter was brought in. He was 
 condemned. The usual solemn preliminaries were 
 attended to the word given ; but there was no 
 Harrison on the field to wave the signal of mercy, 
 and the poor criminal fell. 
 
 At last the important day came, which was to 
 land us on the shores of our enemies. The army 
 embarked in the fleet and a great multitude of boats 
 which had been gathered together. The General, 
 with the Petersburg, Virginia, volunteers, sailed on 
 board the Ariel, with Commodore Perry. The
 
 150 THE SWORD. 
 
 morning was beautiful beyond description. The 
 sun shone with refulgent splendor on our polished 
 arms. The martial waving of the snow-white 
 plumes of the officers, the various uniforms of reg- 
 ulars and volunteers, the solemn silence, interrupted 
 only by the regular movement of springing oars, 
 altogether formed a scene awfully grand. But the 
 scene became still more imposing, when, arriving 
 within a few rods of the shore, every soldier ex- 
 pecting to breast the fury of an ambushed foe, all 
 at once the flapping banner of our host was unfurled 
 to the whistling wind, the concentrated music of the 
 whole army burst, in a national air, .on the ears 
 of a feeling soldiery, and the whole atmosphere 
 around us was filled with the shouts of freemen. 
 It was terrible, even to ourselves, although our 
 bosoms swelled high with the expectation of victory, 
 and every heart throbbed with national pride at 
 the sublimity of the scene. In one moment the 
 extended line of boats struck the shore, and in the 
 next the whole embattled host stood on the bank. 
 "We took up our line of march for Maiden. But 
 we soon learned that the fort had been fired, and 
 that the English had retreated. All had fled but 
 the brave Tecumseh. The citizens told us that he 
 sat on his faithful charger, at the head of the 
 street, and looked till he saw the van of our army 
 entering the suburbs below. He then turned his 
 horse with a sigh, and as the Americans entered 
 one end of the town, he slowly rode out of the
 
 ENEMY PURSUED. 151 
 
 other. He had exhausted all his eloquence in try- 
 ing to persuade the British general to leave him 
 and his braves in possession of the fort. Those 
 who had an opportunity of knowing him, said he 
 was as much superior to Proctor in humanity as he 
 was in courage. To finish his history at once, we 
 will add, that he fell in the battle that followed, in 
 the midst of his people, that were stationed in -the 
 swamp, and, as they say, pierced with many balls; 
 and was buried four miles in the rear. There we 
 suspect he remains to the present day. And the 
 razor-strops, and other precious relics, that will be 
 handed down to future generations, as samples of 
 his hide, are all, as the old chief himself would ex- 
 press it, " ee-shaw." And we believe if his resur- 
 rection should take place to-morrow, it would inter- 
 rupt nobody's shaving utensils in Kentucky or else- 
 where. 
 
 As soon as possible we went in pursuit of the en- 
 emy. It was my fortune to go by way of the lake. 
 We soon found that we had not yet passed through 
 all the shades of military starvation. Before we 
 crossed the lake, we had our rations issued for sev- 
 eral days, and were ordered to jerk our beef, to the 
 end that it might be better preserved, and made 
 more convenient to carry. And it was, indeed, 
 made much more convenient to carry, because, by 
 that process, it became so depreciated in size and 
 weight, that it did not last more than half the time 
 contemplated. And now we had to embark destitute
 
 152 THE SWORD. 
 
 of sea stores. It is true, we had the privilege, three 
 times in each day, of ranging our noses around the 
 caboose, while the jolly tars served up their allow- 
 ance in almost all the variety of culinary science. 
 This was the more aggravating to me, as among 
 their dishes I recognized many an old acquaintance, 
 which I had not tasted since I last entered Cape 
 Henry. There was the "duff," the "chowder," the 
 smoking "lobschouse," and that, too, served up in 
 the very fac-simile of my old smoked tin-pot, out 
 of which I had quaffed many a gallon of tea, and 
 other good things, in by-gone days. Meantime, the 
 sailors looked carelessly among us, as if they thought 
 gentlemen of the army lived upon the wind. I had 
 a great mind to reveal myself to them, and fall 
 upon their sympathies; but as I had taken it upon 
 myself to sustain the character of a soldier, for the 
 time being, I concluded to endure hardness as a 
 good soldier. We went on board hungry we were 
 hungry through the whole cruise, and were at last 
 landed at the mouth of the Thames as ravenous as 
 wolves. For several miles we marched through a 
 mixed population of French and Yankees, and 
 gathered up enough scraps to keep soul and body 
 together. At last we encamped in a beautiful 
 neighborhood that was settled by Scotchmen, who 
 were more loyal than the Englishmen. They would 
 neither give nor sell to His Majesty's enemies. 
 They acknowledged that we had ample power to 
 take; that was one thing; but to collude with the
 
 ENEMY PURSUED. 153 
 
 enemy was another. It was against general orders 
 to plunder, and our battalion had strictly obeyed. 
 But now we had come to our wit's end. At last 
 our commander said, "Boys, you see your case: we 
 can get nothing from these farms for love or money : 
 there is no alternative but to help yourselves." One 
 of every mess took his tomahawk, and walking 
 about the fields, brought in an abundance of pigs, 
 turkeys, geese, etc.; and there was great feasting in 
 the camp. 
 
 At last our van came up with the enemy. It is 
 unnecessary to give a particular account of the 
 battle, as it has been so often described. Indeed, 
 there is but little to be said about it. The Ken- 
 tucky mounted men rushed down upon their lines 
 like a hurricane, and swept all before them. It was 
 a momentary conflict. The whole army surrendered. 
 The Indians on the flank prolonged the fight for 
 a while, but soon fled. Our battalion, which consti- 
 tuted the rear guard, could not get up in time to 
 stop a ball; and I for one was right glad of it; for 
 our time of service was now expired, and the word 
 "home, sweet home," seemed to gather additional 
 charms every day. We returned to Detroit by the 
 lake. The weather was unusually squally. The 
 vessel that I was in carried an enormous gun amid- 
 ships. It was lashed fore and aft. The militia 
 becoming very seasick, crowded down the main 
 hatchway into the hold. We were suddenly struck 
 by a squall, when the Long Tom breaking the lash-
 
 154 THE SWORD. 
 
 ing at the muzzle, slued down to leeward, and the 
 schooner was struck down on her beam-end. The 
 water gushed into the hatchway the soldiers 
 gushed out by platoons. Those who were on deck 
 held on for their lives, and every soul expected in a 
 few minutes to be in eternity. A sailor who was 
 down in the scuppers, had the presence of mind to 
 let fly the fore-sheet, when she partially righted, 
 and the gun was secured, and the sail shortened. 
 It was, however, a very narrow escape. Though 
 alarmed, I recollect, in the midst of the danger, a 
 mortification a kind of cheapness seemed to creep 
 over me at the thought, that after I had traversed 
 over so many mountain swells, and had escaped so 
 many dangers, on the wide Atlantic, I was about to 
 be cast away in a mill-pond, comparatively. We 
 safely arrived at Detroit, where, shortly after, we 
 were discharged on the public parade, the General 
 pronouncing over us a high encomium, and declaring 
 that we had set an example of military subordina- 
 tion to the whole army. 
 
 After our discharge we were landed in Cleveland, 
 and left at perfect liberty to follow our own course. 
 The citizens of Cleveland and vicinity showed us no 
 little kindness the few days we rested among them. 
 We diverted ourselves much with one little circum- 
 stance; and that was, the citizens, from the lordly 
 dome to the log-cabin, were mostly either generals, or 
 colonels, or majors, or captains, or squires, any how. 
 We could scarce find a man without some kind of
 
 ENEMY PURSUED. 155 
 
 handle to his name. Here I stood on the shore 
 of the lake, high and dry, and said in my heart, 
 " One woe is passed ! I shall no more travel that 
 ugly, muddy road from Chillicothe to Columbus ! 
 I shall no more flounder over the snow-drifted 
 plains of Crawford ! I shall no more shiver on the 
 bleak banks of the Sandusky ! I will hie me home 
 to my own sunny Appomattox, and perhaps live 
 and die on its verdant banks." But there is a 
 book, a blessed but mystic book, which says, "It is 
 not in man to direct his steps." Little did I then 
 think that, in less than twelve years, it would be 
 my allotted duty to stand in the city of Columbus, 
 and preach to listening congregations the Gospel of 
 the Son of God. Little did I think that, in a few 
 years more, the house, the very house in Delaware 
 that sheltered the benumbed and weather-beaten 
 soldier, should be his parsonage, while he should 
 travel over the length and breadth of the plains of 
 Crawford, not an unpeopled solitude, but beautifully 
 spotted with farms and dwellings in Summer a 
 boundless prospect of undulating grass, and fragrant 
 flowers of almost every form and shade in Winter 
 a sea of crusted snow, over which the sailor might 
 glide at large in his bounding jumper, and, in his 
 high-wrought imagination, live over his Atlantic 
 rambles. Little did I think that there, even there, 
 I should mingle with the congregated saints, hear 
 the shout of heaven-born souls, and, least of all, 
 that I even even the sinner, I should rejoice in
 
 156 THE SWORD. 
 
 the sound with a joy unspeakable and full of glory. 
 But all this came to pass. While laboring in that 
 section of our work, I was strongly solicited by 
 Eussel Bigelow, the superintendent of the mission, 
 to visit the "Keserve." I did so on a quarterly 
 meeting occasion. While preaching to the Indians, 
 through an Indian interpreter, I mentioned that I 
 had once earnestly sought them before, with my 
 body clothed in hostile armor, and murder in my 
 heart; but that, in examining my soul, I found that 
 God had gotten to himself a greater victory there; 
 for now the weapons of my warfare were no longer 
 carnal, and the theme that I most delighted in was 
 peace on earth, good-will toward men. To give 
 them a clearer understanding of my position in the 
 last war, I told them that I belonged to that com- 
 pany which the Indians used to call, "The men 
 with the silver birds in their caps" As I mentioned 
 this, significant glances were thrown round the 
 assembly, and my interpreter faltered as he gave it 
 out. As soon as the service was over, he declared 
 that he was with the hostile Indians that defended 
 the British battery against the sally from Fort 
 Meigs, and that he fought against that very com- 
 pany. He said the Indians were particularly anx- 
 ious to kill our men; for they thought that the 
 silver-leaf spread eagles on our helmets were made 
 of the solid stuff. Brother Bigelow took advantage 
 of this circumstance while administering the sacra- 
 ment next morning. He laid one hand on my head,
 
 DISCHARGED. 157 
 
 and the other on the interpreter, and said, "Breth- 
 ren, these two, during the last war, were arrayed 
 in hateful strife against each other; but behold the 
 victories of the Cross! they are now kneeling, in 
 Christian fellowship and communion, at this table, 
 to show forth the death of their common Lord and 
 Savior." The effect on the white part of the con- 
 gregation was powerful; but as the interpreter gave 
 it in excited and broken accents to the nation, it 
 was overwhelming. 
 
 Our company being broke up at Cleveland, we 
 scattered in little social bands, in different routes, 
 to seek our homes. I traveled in company with 
 three of my most intimate friends. Our reception, 
 or treatment, on the way, was various, according 
 to the religious and political views of the people. 
 One of our company became lame at the commence- 
 ment of the journey, which retarded us consider- 
 ably. In this dilemma we saw a very starch-look- 
 ing Quaker overtaking us with a led horse. At 
 this sight our comrade's limping evidently in- 
 creased, and his pain became almost insupportable. 
 We each made a very low and handsome bow to 
 the stranger as he approached; but no response did 
 we receive. We, however, surrounded him, and 
 with the most moving eloquence that we could 
 command, began to intercede for our lame friend. 
 He very roughly refused us, declaring that be had 
 nothing to do with war or any who were concerned 
 in it. This exasperated our invalid, and he began
 
 158 THE SWORD. 
 
 to be abusive. I told him this was wrong. Per- 
 haps the Quaker was conscientious in this matter. 
 No doubt he thought he would be doing the devil 
 service by giving him a seat in the vacant saddle. 
 This was like throwing oil on the flame. "Con- 
 scientious, indeed ! What, too conscientious to give 
 a lift to a poor lame soldier, who has been fighting 
 the battles of his country?" "Yes, it is even so, 
 and you may just as well coil down, and take the 
 world as it is, and not as it ought to be." 0, give 
 us forever that religion 
 
 "Which hates the sin, but still the sinner loves" 
 
 which hates war, but is ever ready to mitigate the 
 evils and heal the wounds which war has made! 
 
 We sometimes met with those who were polit- 
 ically opposed to the war. They also answered us 
 roughly. At other times we had to do with real 
 patriots true blues. Among these were women, 
 not a few, who, with moistened eyes, blessed us, as 
 we passed, in the name of the Lord. When we 
 were well advanced in our journey, we fell in with 
 a company of loafers, a kind of people who, as soon 
 as they see any person or new thing, begin to cast 
 about in their minds what they can make of it. 
 They chose to look upon us as deserters, and set 
 about to arrest us. We labored with many argu- 
 ments, to prove that we were true men; but all to 
 no purpose. When we found that they were medi- 
 tating to carry us to Washington, we concluded, 
 on consultation, that such a ride, at their expense,
 
 DISCHARGED. 159 
 
 would advance us considerably toward home, and it 
 was more than probable that when Uncle Sam 
 recognized us as his old fast friends, he would lift 
 us still farther by way of indemnity. So we con- 
 cluded to be deserters, if they would have it so. 
 But when they found that we had become so well 
 reconciled to a jaunt, they began to conclude we 
 were Virginians, and possibly Virginia volunteers. 
 We now walked rapidly, sometimes as many as 
 forty-five miles in a day. Our money also went 
 rapidly, and our purse began to wrinkle with age. 
 On the evening of a beautiful day, we were enter- 
 ing the romantic town of Winchester. A gentle- 
 man rode hastily by, making a profound bow. He 
 quickly turned his horse, and inquired if we were 
 of the Virginia volunteers. Being answered in the 
 affirmative, he put whip and spurs to his horse, and 
 was soon hid from our view by the houses in the 
 suburbs. At the head of the main street, we were 
 met by several young men, who conducted us to 
 the hotel, and ordered a splendid supper. Their 
 number continually increased; and we found that 
 they were members of a volunteer company that 
 had served a tour on the sea-board, and were, there- 
 fore, tenderly alive to our sufferings. We sat up to 
 a late hour, indulging in a social interchange of our 
 adventures. One of their company was truly a 
 singular genius. He was famous for his extempo- 
 raneous effusions in the way of song. The com- 
 pany requested us to propose some topic of national
 
 160 THE SWORD. 
 
 interest. This we did twice or thrice, but he sung 
 them off in such a masterly manner, that we could 
 not help surmising that he had previously exercised 
 his pen on almost every subject of public notoriety. 
 The company then proposed that we would relate 
 some incident that had transpired in the western 
 army, which was not generally known, provided it 
 was sufficiently stirring to elicit his zeal. This we 
 did. And after clearing his throat, and attending 
 to all the preliminaries that good singers always 
 observe by note, he caroled forth a beautiful versi- 
 fication of the whole matter. When the company 
 broke they paid off the bill, including in the set- 
 tlement a warm and early breakfast for the poor 
 soldiers. Such a windfall as this would have been 
 considered only as a circumstance in our jolly debut 
 into the military life; but coming to disbanded 
 soldiers, displumed of all martial attractions, it was 
 truly grateful. 
 
 The day before we entered Fredericksburg we 
 had spent our all. And although it was a lovely 
 day overhead, yet our hearts were sad, as we 
 deliberated on our situation. "We were far from 
 home. We had not time to dig, and to beg we 
 were ashamed. When we entered into the town, 
 we naturally stepped into the first tavern, as stage- 
 horses would stop at a post-office. We had hardly 
 seated ourselves, when a schoolmate of mine en- 
 tered. He immediately recognized me; and, after 
 a few friendly remarks, requested me to step out
 
 DISCHARGED. 161 
 
 with him. He took me into a retired part of the 
 yard, and looking round, as if to see whether any 
 fowls of the air were hovering about, and as if he 
 meditated some grand outrage on fallen human 
 nature, he asked me, in a subdued tone, how I was 
 off for funds. I plainly and honestly replied that 
 the "last shot in the locker" was expended. A 
 flush of humanity suffused his benevolent brow, and 
 he put his hand in his pocket. I knew that his 
 family was of Virginia's noblest stock. And from 
 all that I had seen in our school-boy days, I be- 
 lieved that he had inherited all the nobility of his 
 house. Therefore I could not accuse my eyes of pre- 
 sumption, when I felt that they were anticipating 
 the circumference of a full "shiner" a Dei Gratia, 
 a Spanish dollar for which I would have been 
 truly thankful. But the reader may guess how my 
 soul was flooded with joy and gratitude, when he 
 presented me with a twenty-dollar note, and a 
 handsome apology, that he was on a journey, and 
 knew not how long he would be gone, otherwise he 
 would give me more. He then fled from my over- 
 flowing soul and eyes, as if he had perpetrated will- 
 ful murder. I know not whether he is still living; 
 but, dead or alive, I still pray for him, as the old 
 'negro said, "at a venture." I may be in the same 
 fix that the pious sister P., of Xenia, once was. 
 When we moved to this State, more than twenty 
 years ago, she inquired about an old Methodist 
 preacher, whom she had highly esteemed. We told
 
 162 THE SWORD. 
 
 her he had been dead about six years. "Dear, dear 
 me!" said the old lady, "why did they not send me 
 word? I have been praying for him faithfully, 
 night and day, six years, and he all the time safely 
 landed in heaven !" I went into the tavern, and 
 gave my comrades a pluck; but they seemed to be 
 fast moored. Poor fellows, they still had a faint 
 hope that some liberal loafer would offer them a 
 drink, or luncheon, or something of the kind. But 
 at last they weighed anchor, though I could hardly 
 tow them along. Every step they took seemed to 
 indicate that they looked for nothing but ruin and 
 starvation beyond the corporation of Fredericks- 
 burg. But when we had got beyond the public 
 gaze, I said, "Cheer up, boys; Providence has sent 
 me a breeze. I am now able to take the stage, and 
 reel it off at the rate of eight knots an hour, home- 
 ward bound; but for your sakes I forbear. If you 
 will be economical, leave off this tavern fare, and 
 let me be your purser, I will take you all home." 
 I then stepped into a grocery, and stored our knap- 
 sacks well with cheese and crackers, and we moved 
 on with fresh life. 
 
 At last we arrived at Richmond. Here, at the 
 commencement of our career, every door was open 
 to us. But now the returning soldier passed along 
 unheeded, unrecognized. At last a poor man I 
 believe a pious man invited us to his home, to 
 take pot-luck. And this he did, not through osten- 
 tation or vainglory, but sheer benevolence. We
 
 HOME. 163 
 
 found that girding on the armor was one thing, 
 and taking it off was another; and we were well 
 convinced that a young man of fruitful imagination 
 might reap all the honor and glory of war in the 
 domestic muster-field, without suffering any of its 
 evils. Here our little platoon scattered again. I 
 had twenty-five miles to go to reach home. This 
 distance was measured leisurely, soberly, thought- 
 fully, with an intention to make my return after 
 nightfall. In all my returns home, by land or 
 water, I loved to come in under the cover of night. 
 About dusk I crossed the Appomattox, on Pocahon- 
 tas bridge trod lightly over Sandy beach entered 
 Bolingbrooke-street. It was now dark. I was 
 closely scrutinized by every passenger, but had 
 drawn my helmet down. I can not describe my 
 feelings as the familiar scenes of my bright boyhood 
 came up in quick succession. At last I stood, with 
 almost breathless agitation, at my home's door. A 
 few faint raps raised the latch, and stood in the 
 presence of my mother. She lifted her eyes, gave 
 one shrill scream, and exclaimed, "O Alfred! 
 Alfred ! my son Alfred !" A pious lady, who lived 
 in the next tenement, and whose soul was, relig- 
 iously speaking, on the hair-spring order, and who, 
 moreover, always levied a contribution of honey, 
 more or less, on the most poisonous bitters of life, 
 as they passed, heard the exclamation. It reminded 
 her of David, "weeping as he went, and saying, 
 Absalom, Absalom, my son Absalom !" This
 
 164 THE SWORD. 
 
 sprung a class of reflections that instantaneously 
 exploded in a shout. My little sisters, and neigh- 
 bors, and acquaintances crowded round. And here 
 my pen would paint a domestic scene; but perhaps 
 my fair readers might drop a tear or two, inflame 
 their eyes, and put their lips out of "prim;" and 
 this might anger you, and ye might say, as a cer- 
 tain lady, who takes more liberties with me than 
 any other, sometimes says, "Pshaw! Mr. L., you 
 certainly are the childishest man that ever was."
 
 THE CAPTURED BUGLE. 165 
 
 XI. 
 
 THE CAPTURED BUGLE. 
 
 IT is not generally known that after the long 
 siege of Fort Meigs the enemy invested that post 
 the second time. Although this is but slightly or 
 incidentally mentioned in some accounts of the last 
 war, yet it was an expedition that was largely pre- 
 sumed on by the English. The intention was to 
 carry out a stratagem which had been conceived 
 and principally planned by the celebrated Indian 
 chieftain Tecumseh. It is spoken of to the present 
 day, by the veterans of the Rapids, as " Tecumseh's 
 sham battle." After the first repulse of the British, 
 measures of very strict precaution were adopted. 
 One improvement was the establishment of a picket 
 guard in the edge of the clearing, to prevent a sur- 
 prise. This guard was generally marched out at 
 the rising, and remanded into the fort at the setting 
 of the sun. The post was occupied at first with 
 true military vigilance. But as no enemy appeared 
 for some time, the soldiers became very careless. 
 They would sometimes stack their arms, kindle a 
 fire, and spend the whole day in telling stories, 
 playing cards, etc. One lovely morning, as the
 
 166 THE SWORD. 
 
 guard was marching out, not strictly in the order 
 of battle, and were within a few yards of their post, 
 as many as eight or ten rifles blazed away from 
 the thicket, and not more than two men made good 
 their retreat. It was soon evident that we were 
 again surrounded by an English and Indian force. 
 They lay round our fortress for several days. As 
 no batteries were constructed, and no besieging en- 
 gines or apparatus could be discovered, the general 
 belief was that they meditated a storm. Indeed, 
 constant efforts were made to deepen this impression. 
 Every morning before daylight, they marched round 
 the fort at a respectable distance, of course playing 
 on a single instrument, which poured forth the most 
 perfect and lovely music of the kind which we had 
 ever heard. Mullen, who was one of the volunteer- 
 band, and who was passionately fond of instrumental 
 music, would listen with the most profound but 
 quizzical attention, presenting either ear alternately, 
 blinking significantly, like a magpie, till the close 
 of the air, and then would exclaim, with the 
 strongest assurance imaginable, "Boys, I will never 
 see Petersburg again till I blow a blast with that 
 same sweet bugle." This always provoked a burst 
 of incredulous laughter; but as often as the music 
 came round, he would repeat his unreasonable 
 prophecy, to the no small diversion of his comrades. 
 After the enemy had made their pompous and 
 harmless promenades, till they had lost both their 
 novelty and terror, they aimed to carry into execu-
 
 THE CAPTURED BUGLE. 16? 
 
 tion the scheme of their grand ambuscade. About 
 10, A. M., on a sultry morning, a distant, continu- 
 ous roar of small arms was heard on the Sandusky 
 road, but heard very indistinctly. The sound, how- 
 ever, rapidly increased. It seemed as if a reen- 
 forcement was fighting its way to the camp. Hark ! 
 hark ! Now they rush on with an impetuosity that 
 bears down all opposition. Louder and louder 
 nigher and nigher! Well done, old Kentuck! 
 Now they will cut their way through, in spite of 
 redcoats or red skins. 
 
 But now, alas! alas! they retreat, they fly! 
 They are making back for Sandusky. The din of 
 the battle recedes toward the settlement. No, no; 
 they rally to the charge. Onward the human tem- 
 pest comes "enlarging, deepening, mingling peal 
 on peal." Now they have almost gained the clear- 
 ing columns of smoke are seen rolling up among 
 the branches of the trees the roar of rifles and 
 musketry, the shrieks of the wounded and dying, 
 the shouts of the soldiers, the brutal yells of the 
 savages are heard. All the horrors of the battle-field 
 are about to burst upon our sight. The soldiers in 
 the garrison are standing at their posts in almost 
 breathless anxiety, with their strained and aching 
 eyes fastened on the underbrush, expecting every 
 moment to see our victorious band make their 
 debut, amid the cheers and huzzas of the whole 
 fortress. But 0, sad reverse! A general flight 
 commences. The British and Indians seem to drive
 
 168 THE SWORD. 
 
 the retreating forces like sheep to the slaughter. 
 At this juncture the troops in the fort became 
 almost unmanageable. "There," said some, "see 
 how they are driving and cutting up our men, our 
 friends, our BRETHREN, who have pressed to relieve 
 us, and that right under our guns! Here we are 
 with our hands in our pockets where is the Gen- 
 eral? 0, if Harrison was only in the fort!" Some 
 could scarcely be restrained by the officers from 
 springing over the picketing, while some wept like 
 children. Messengers were dispatched through the 
 lines with the information that the commander had 
 received, the evening before, an express from Har- 
 rison, stating that he would send on no reenforce- 
 ments. While the running fight was raging in all 
 its fury, an unusually black cloud, which had been 
 gathering over our heads for some time, began to 
 discharge its magazines of forked lightning and 
 deafening thunder. In a few minutes the rain fell 
 in mighty torrents. The martial flame of ardent 
 warriors became quenched, and in one moment the 
 clamor of battle ceased. 
 
 We were told by prisoners, that several of Te- 
 cumseh's men realized, by fatal experience, that the 
 battle, so far as they were concerned, was no sham 
 at all. The Irish soldiers cherished such a mortal 
 hatred to their red allies, that they occasionally 
 dropped in a bullet, and laid some of their finest 
 braves on the ground. We were subsequently in- 
 formed that, pending the engagement, the English
 
 THE CAPTURED BUGLE. 169 
 
 cavalry were posted both above and below the fort, 
 under cover of the forest. Their orders were to 
 rush between the garrison and combatants, as soon 
 as a sortie might be made. It was also contem- 
 plated to make a sudden assault, by choice troops, 
 on the most defenseless quarter of the camp at the 
 same time. In all this our enemies were disap- 
 pointed. Being much chagrined by their entire fail- 
 ure, and believing the old proverb, that " a half of a 
 loaf is better than no loaf," they confidently filed off 
 to Fort Stevenson, to take that "for certain." But 
 here they met a very disgraceful defeat. Soon after, 
 the army at Meigs marched for Camp Seneca, to 
 await the battle that was expected on the lake. 
 There were the prisoners who had been taken at 
 Fort Stevenson, and among them the little trum- 
 peter who had so often and so untimely partly 
 charmed and partly frightened us to our quarters. 
 And Mullen yes, Mullen had the inexpressible 
 satisfaction of giving us his best nourish on the 
 captured BUGLE. But as slavery debases all sub- 
 jected to its malign touch, the sweet instrument 
 was stripped of all that interest and melody with 
 which peculiar circumstances had graced it. It no 
 longer threw its wild notes over the nocturnal soli- 
 tude of the Maumee, and told a startled enemy that 
 it was followed by "an army with banners." In- 
 deed, its legitimate owner, like the captive Israelite, 
 could no longer breathe with complacency the loyal 
 
 airs of old England "in a strange land." 
 
 15
 
 170 THE CROSS. 
 
 XII. 
 
 RELIGIOUS EXPERIENCE-LORENZO 
 DOW. 
 
 IN entering on this subject we need not go back 
 to that sweet and timely introduction which I had 
 to the power of Divine grace in early childhood, of 
 which we have written. Like many of the children 
 of our people, for several years I felt that vacilla- 
 ting conflict so closely described by an inspired 
 apostle "the flesh warring against the Spirit, and 
 the Spirit warring against the flesh" now careless 
 or reckless; now repenting and weeping. 
 
 But suddenly there was a report in our land that 
 a wild man a preacher diverse from all others was 
 making his way into Lower Virginia. He had a 
 solemn presentiment that his days were numbered, 
 and he was drawing nigh to his terminus. In after- 
 life he insisted that this decree was reversed by his 
 going to preach the Gospel in England and Ireland. 
 He slept on the floor, and was very abstemious. 
 He received no money unless it was clear to him 
 that it was to meet some pressing want such as 
 ferriage or hire of conveyance. It was reported 
 that, at times, he possessed the spirit of prophecy, 
 and occasionally the discernment of spirits. We
 
 LORENZO DOW. 171 
 
 were daily looking for his advent; but wondered 
 how it would be. One day a stranger was seen 
 walking down the street with hasty strides and 
 noiseless tread, with a wonderful train of children 
 of all colors at least, white, black, and yellow. 
 Some preceded in double-quick time, and announced 
 with great satisfaction "The wild man is coming!" 
 Indeed, he looked wild enough. He had a sailor 
 tarpaulin on his head, a green military coatee, half- 
 worn and displumed of its party-colored ornaments, 
 a pair of kneebreeches, with straps and buckles 
 dangling about, and his shins "sans every thing," 
 as Shakespeare would say. He carried a bundle of 
 handbills, which he distributed freely; they were 
 headed with large letters "HUSH! and HARK ! 
 This afternoon at three o'clock, LORENZO Dow will 
 preach under the FEDERAL OAKS." He carried 
 besides a package of tracts. These were sparingly 
 delivered. In passing one man he would suddenly 
 stop, and look as if he were searching into the 
 inner chamber of his soul, and he would hand him 
 a tract. He would then pass by several as if they 
 belonged to another planet. Sometimes he would 
 pass a store several yards, and then, as if arrested 
 by a sudden impulse, he would wheel round and 
 throw in a paper messenger. Sometimes he would 
 dart across the street to give a tract to a man the 
 whole current of little ones pouring after him as 
 though they expected every moment some grand 
 development of which they were determined to lose
 
 172 THE CROSS. 
 
 nothing. Who could blame them when all the 
 doors, windows, and. entries were crowded with 
 adult gazers as excited as themselves? Children 
 always take hold on religious novelties. In the 
 days of our Savior they followed on and cried 
 out, "Hosanna to the Son of David that cometh 
 in the name of the Lord; hosanna in the highest!" 
 The Pharisees here saw that their cause was gone, 
 and they said among themselves, "Perceive ye 
 how ye prevail nothing? Behold, the world has 
 gone after him." Yes, the rising generation has 
 caught the sound. But Jesus said, " Have ye never 
 read, Out of the mouth of babes and sucklings 
 thou hast perfected praise?" The triumph would 
 not have been perfect without those juvenile 
 praises. The Lord bless the children! as bad as 
 they are. We have been accustomed I mean my 
 chief mate and myself at every removal to say, 
 "Surely, the children of this place are the worst 
 we have ever seen;" but Christ said, "Let them 
 alone." Many that paddled after Lorenzo Dow, at 
 last rolled "right side up;" and some will, doubt- 
 less, walk the gold-paved streets of the New Jeru- 
 salem. 
 
 At the hour appointed nearly all the stores were 
 closed, and the whole population was afloat some 
 on foot, some on horse, some in their chariots, and 
 some from the country in wagons, and an immense 
 congregation was found under the wide-spread 
 branches of the Federal Oaks. Presently the
 
 LORENZO DOW. 173 
 
 preacher appears. He looked round for a con- 
 venient stand, and seeing an old-fashioned chariot, 
 almost unvarnished by the brush of time, that had 
 a large platform behind for a footman, and a small 
 window in the rear, he leaped up, and faced the 
 most of the congregation. Lorenzo was, even then, 
 eccentric, but seriously so. He had not attained to 
 that humorous and laughter-rousing vein that 
 marked his discourses after he believed that God 
 had added more than fifteen years to his probation. 
 In the course of his remarks he spoke of family diffi- 
 culties; of children who had eaten at the same table, 
 slept in the same bed, and had gone to the same 
 school, yet in after-life engaged in lawsuits with 
 each other; and of some who would even bring 
 lawsuits against their own mother who bore them. 
 He then stopped short, as by a sudden surge, and 
 stooping down, he put his mouth to the window of 
 the carriage, and said, "Ah, old mammy, you know 
 what I am talking about!" This startled the whole 
 congregation. The talk was applicable to her, and 
 her only. She was the richest matron in the town. 
 Her sons had been lawing with each other, and one 
 had been so unnatural as to sue his mother. 
 
 After he had preached, he proposed to enter into 
 a covenant with the people. The covenant was, 
 that he would pray daily for three weeks for every 
 one who would pray in like manner for themselves. 
 Their agreement to this was to be manifested by 
 their shaking hands with him while singing the
 
 174 THE CROSS. 
 
 concluding hymn. The congregation flocked around 
 him weeping and trying to sing. I felt almost as 
 if my salvation depended on entering into said cov- 
 enant. My father was standing by me, and this 
 was a great cross. But I looked up in his face, 
 and saw that he looked uncommonly mellow. I felt 
 as if my heart would burst outright. I reached up 
 my hand, but would not let the preacher catch my 
 eye, for fear he would tell all the people what a 
 bad boy I had been. As well as my memory will 
 serve me, I believe I kept my promise. Some days 
 I might have forgotten it, but then on other days 
 I would pray double; for I was a great believer in 
 the doctrine of commutation. The preacher had 
 his next appointment some miles in the country. 
 He was trudging along on foot, when one Mr. E., 
 who had heard him under the oaks, came along in 
 his chaise, and kindly gave him a lift to his ap- 
 pointment. After he had preached, Mr. E. took 
 leave of him, saying he had some business to do, 
 but he would see him again at his next appoint- 
 ment at P. Lorenzo looked at him sorrowfully, 
 and said, "No, I feel there is a blow coming; where 
 it will strike the Lord knows whether on you or 
 me but I have a strong impression we will not see 
 each other again in time." Mr. E. left, but had 
 not gone far on his way, when his horse took fright 
 and ran away; Mr. E. was flung out and killed. 
 
 Lorenzo did not seem to aim at prophesying. 
 He told some of the preachers who inquired of
 
 LOEENZO DOW. 175 
 
 him in regard to this matter, that when he first 
 started, sometimes in the midst of his discourse, an 
 idea altogether foreign to his arrangement would be 
 presented, and he would reject it. In doing so he 
 would plunge into darkness, mental and spiritual, 
 so that at last he determined to follow such impulse, 
 and then he had freedom. While we are writing 
 of him, I will say that many years after, when I 
 was living in New Orleans, I saw him again. When 
 I entered the room where he was, and before any 
 introduction, he said to me, "What do you think 
 of Bonny?" 
 
 "What Bonny?" 
 
 "Why, Bonaparte." 
 
 "He seems to be laying waste." 
 
 Here he began to unfold to me the important 
 niche that he occupied in the Apocalypse. And 
 his mind seemed to be mostly occupied with Bona- 
 parte and the prophets, and he seemed to forget the 
 vices of Napoleon in his victories. 
 
 Several years after I saw him down in Ohio, and 
 heard him preach in my own pulpit. Then he dis- 
 coursed in a funny way of courtship and matrimony, 
 to the great amusement of old and young. Wisdom 
 might be justified in all these changes, and I hope 
 his life of labor was crowned with a triumphant 
 end. Many were laid under conviction in his ear- 
 liest labors, and in many this conviction resulted in 
 bright conversions. Not so in my case. He laid 
 me under contribution for some time, but my seri-
 
 176 THE CROSS. 
 
 ousness passed away "like the early cloud." In 
 my last voyage home as mate of a brig, as already 
 observed, with a heavy charge, beating about, and 
 making and taking in sail continually, on the coast, 
 and driven by a long succession of snow-storms, I 
 again became serious, and spent much of the short 
 rest allowed me in my state-room, in prayer. On 
 this occasion I attained to the condition which our 
 Discipline accords to a mourner or seeker ; but I was 
 without the Church. In after years I have felt 
 very thankful that the Methodist Episcopal Church 
 "receiveth sinners," penitent sinners. In this she 
 is most apostolic. This shines out in the Gospel. 
 One apostle in writing to the Church, addresses 
 members in various conditions : " babes, young men, 
 old men," or sages, and this not in reference to 
 their natural ages, but to their attainment. For 
 the time is come when the child dies a hundred 
 years old, but the sinner dying a hundred years 
 old is accursed. 
 
 An inspired apostle addresses some in the Church 
 who were still carnal to a considerable extent. 
 Again there were some who had been religious, but 
 were fallen from grace. " Ye are fallen from grace." 
 Our Savior in his message to the angel of the Church 
 of Ephesus says, "Thou hast left thy first love." 
 Does he excommunicate? No, but says, "Kepent 
 and do thy first works, or else I will come unto 
 thee quickly and remove thy candlestick out of his 
 place, except thou repent." He bore " with him for
 
 RELIGIOUS EXPERIENCE. 177 
 
 a season." And why? Because if backsliders can 
 not be reclaimed in the Church, with all her means 
 of grace, they may be irrecoverably lost when cast 
 out. The whole world has no remedy for the lost. 
 We regard the Church of Christ as a divinely-in- 
 stituted hospital, a blessed asylum for all who are 
 oppressed of the devil. But while it is a hospital, 
 and strains every means for a recovery, when pa- 
 tients become incurable, she casts them out "ex- 
 cept they repent" In these gracious times of re- 
 freshing which come from the presence of the Lord, 
 -we have seen those who have been in the Church 
 seeking salvation for one, two, sometimes three 
 years, brightly converted. During their probation, 
 their membership has shielded them from outbreak- 
 ing sins, and when they see the bush all divinely 
 fired, they begin to cast their shoes from off their 
 feet, and cry in mighty anguish, "Speak, Lord, for 
 thy servant heareth." 
 
 We have seen, with pain, our ministers, in some 
 sections, insisting on unquestionable regeneration, as a 
 term of Church membership.* If this should become 
 general, it would destroy one of our distinct features 
 as a Church, and would work ruinously. Moreover, 
 it would hurt our Church only. The Calvinistic 
 Churches receive those who are evangelically con- 
 victed, and who truly repent ; because they sincerely 
 
 * It seems to us that, as a condition of full membership in the 
 Church, it is not too much to require that the candidate shall be a 
 new creature in Christ Jesus. ED.
 
 178 THE CROSS. 
 
 believe that regeneration is before repentance; and 
 that when the Holy Spirit truly convicts, He will 
 carry on the work to full redemption. They call 
 true penitents "babes in Christ," but although babes, 
 they have the promise of a full growth. We do 
 not stop to contend whether they or we are right 
 in doctrine. We are both right in receiving such 
 characters into the Church. But if we go to receive 
 only regenerated persons, according to our standard 
 of regeneration, we will turn away many who in 
 future years would be an ornament to our Church. 
 We are well persuaded, if the question could be put- 
 to our whole Church, it would be found that a 
 majority of our members experienced religion in 
 the Church. But unfortunately for myself, I did 
 not join the Church on my return; but having 
 received full wages as an officer, I strutted about in 
 a suit of "long togs," which I had purchased in 
 L.ondon, and neglected the high concerns of my 
 soul. This will appear by my seeking a place in a 
 privateer. I feel thankful to this day that I was 
 led to the war; because it was a higher principle 
 that urged me on ; and in comparison with the float- 
 ing hell from which I escaped, war itself was a 
 minister of grace. It did not, however, add one 
 cubit to my moral stature. 
 
 When I returned from the war, the whole world 
 looked gloomy and sad. I was sensible that the 
 beauties of nature were in no way impaired, and 
 that the wrong was in myself. I determined to
 
 EELIGIOUS EXPERIENCE. 179 
 
 seek a higher life. With this in view, I retired, at 
 stated periods, into a garret, and prayed and medi- 
 tated, and became very serious.
 
 180 THE CROSS. 
 
 XIII. 
 
 CAMP MEETINQ DAWNING OF LIQHT. 
 
 ONE day my mother told me that she and some 
 Methodist ladies were very anxious to go to a 
 camp meeting that was to be held soon; but they 
 could not go without some male person to assist 
 them. I had never been to a camp meeting, and 
 cheerfully consented to take the supervision of 
 things. I intended not to remit my private relig- 
 ious exercises. On the day appointed, we started in 
 the wagon, with our tent and baggage. When we 
 drew nigh to the encampment, and made a sudden 
 turn in the way, a large portion of the camp broke 
 upon our vision. The tents were made mostly of 
 the old bleached sails of sloops and schooners, and 
 sheets and coverlets, and contrasted beautifully with 
 the dark-green pine forest in which they were 
 pitched. "When this scene suddenly broke upon us, 
 this idea flashed upon my mind, "How goodly are 
 thy tents, Jacob! and thy tabernacles, Israel! 
 Let me die the death of the righteous, and let my 
 last end be like his." This almost overwhelmed me. 
 After we had established ourselves, I walked about 
 the encampment, attended on the services, and did 
 not forget my own religious arrangements.
 
 CAMP MEETING. 181 
 
 One dark, rainy night, our young stationed 
 preacher held a prayer meeting in a tent, and after 
 exhorting invited those who were seeking religion 
 to kneel at some chairs that were set out. I went 
 with the rest. Straw was strewed over the floor, 
 and although the tent did not leak much, yet the 
 water, unperceived, had run under it, so that when 
 we kneeled our knees plunged down in the straw 
 and mud, and before midnight it became somewhat 
 of an annoyance; but still I thought I gave myself 
 up, altogether, to God, for time and eternity. Still 
 the meeting broke without affording any comfort. 
 The next day brought no relief. In the afternoon, 
 while lying alone in our tent, bemoaning my state, 
 with tears in my eyes, a beautiful girl, about twelve 
 or thirteen, a daughter of one of our Methodist 
 neighbors, came in, and scornfully turning up her 
 nose, said, "Ar'n't you ashamed, seeking religion? 
 If you do n't quit this, I will never have you in the 
 world," and with indignation burning on her cheeks, 
 she left. This was the first that I knew that such 
 a thought had ever mingled with the whimseys of 
 the little innocent. This was a personification of 
 the gay world the scorn and contempt that awaited 
 me. Still I thought, if I can only have salvation, I 
 can surely afford that loss. \ 
 
 The next morning, feeling ^old and somewhat in- 
 disposed, I saw Charles, a mulatto that my father 
 had raised, and who was now a\hackman. He was 
 much attached to me, for I had taught him to read.
 
 182 THE CROSS. 
 
 He beckoned me to his hack, and said in a confiding 
 whisper, "I have brought a little spirit along with 
 me, and I think a little dram might do you some 
 good." Well, I truly believed with Charles that it 
 would do me good, physically. I had been in the 
 habit of meeting with other young men, when we 
 would go to market for our mothers, in the dram- 
 shop of a widow, where we would treat each other, 
 and we did not apprehend any danger; but I had 
 found out, before the camp meeting, that I had got 
 so as to have no appetite for my breakfast till I 
 had taken my mint sling; and I had abandoned the 
 practice. It seemed to me that it would amount to 
 a serious sin to take a dram in my present state. 
 I refused, and opened my mind freely to Charles. 
 It was not long before he got to see things in the 
 same light, and became a pious Baptist minister, 
 and finally a citizen of Liberia. I mention these 
 small things to show to what mean shifts the enemy 
 will resort, through his various agencies, to turn 
 aside one who is learning to do right. I wandered 
 about the camp, and was almost driven to infidelity. 
 The argument in my mind was, the Lord has said, 
 "Whosoever cometh unto me, I will in no wise cast 
 out." But you have come to the Lord come sin- 
 cerely, as your own heart tells you, but he has not 
 received you. Where is the promise of the Lord? 
 Then this came to my mind others have come, 
 have found mercy, and are now rejoicing; therefore, 
 there must be something wrong in your case. Be-
 
 CAMP MEETING. 183 
 
 sides, it does not become a mortal sinner, who lias 
 been so often called, and who has so often rejected 
 the calls of God, to expect him to come promptly 
 at your call. If you should call all your life long, 
 and the Lord should then save you, what a great 
 mercy it would be! This thought struck me with 
 great force, and seemed highly reasonable. Then I 
 said, I will still pray, and avoid all sin, as I have 
 been striving to do, and if mercy comes at last my 
 fortune will be made for all eternity. 
 
 In this frame we got into the wagon to return 
 home. After we had proceeded several miles, while 
 some of the sisters were singing one of the songs of 
 Zion, strange and supernatural fire seemed to glow 
 within my breast; new views, new motives, new 
 purposes arose within me. I requested the wagon- 
 er to stop his team awhile. I got down, walked 
 ahead, and sometimes felt like leaping for joy. My 
 sorrow was gone, and sweet tranquillity reigned 
 within. But still I did not take this for conver- 
 sion; I was looking for something more miraculous, 
 not considering how great a miracle it was for 
 peace to take possession of a sinner's soul. My tes- 
 timony was very fluctuating. When a religious 
 friend would meet me, and express the joy he felt 
 on hearing of my conversion, if I was in a happy 
 frame, I would say, yes, I believe I have been con- 
 verted. If another would question me, while dif- 
 ferently exercised, I would say, I feel there has 
 been some change, but I hardly know whether it is
 
 184 THE CROSS. 
 
 conversion. I have since believed it was justifica- 
 tion without a clear evidence. 
 
 It was not very long after this that I received 
 two bright manifestations of the mercy of God, as I 
 believe. The first was while I was meditating on 
 Christ as a babe in the manger. All at once I was 
 overwhelmed with a most unearthly transport 
 of joy and peace. The second was just as I had 
 prayed, laid aside my dress, and was laying my 
 head upon my pillow. It seemed as if a flock 
 of happy and invisible spirits were all around 
 me and over me. I was as sensible of their pres- 
 ence as if I had seen them with my eyes, or 
 touched them with my hands, and this was accom- 
 panied with a bliss that was all celestial. Then 
 this came to my mind with a definition and clear- 
 ness that I had never felt before, and may add, have 
 never fully realized since "A joy unspeakable and 
 full of glory" And I said, "Lord, what is this?" 
 And there came a voice to my soul bear with me, 
 reader a voice that did not traverse my auditory 
 nerve, and which my ear had nothing to do with 
 a voice as clear and as distinct to my soul as that 
 of earthly sound to my ear "The Spirit of the 
 Lord, bearing witness with your spirit, that you 
 are a child of God." Some will say, "enthusiasm!" 
 Well, if it ia found so at the last, it has ever been 
 my safeguard from disbelief in the spiritual world. 
 It has established in me the doctrine not inde- 
 pendent of the Scriptures that the soul possesses
 
 CAMP MEETING. 185 
 
 senses of itself, to which our outward senses are 
 only mediums mediums between the outward 
 world and the inner man. But God, who is a pure 
 and unmixed spirit, can operate on our inward 
 senses, independently of our bodily organs. 
 
 At this time I did not know that others had 
 been so exercised; but I soon found, by reading 
 and hearing the experience of the pious, that the 
 Lord has manifested himself to others in similar 
 ways. Some have had a representation of Christ to 
 their spiritual sight, as Colonel Gardner; some to 
 their hearing; and the Lord reveals himself to all 
 Christians through their spiritual feeling. We feel, 
 not physically, but spiritually, the Spirit of God 
 bearing witness with our spirit that we are born of 
 God. We do not believe that these extra manifest- 
 ations exalt those who receive them, in point of 
 Christian distinction, above the youngest child of 
 grace-; nor do we believe that it adds any force to 
 their justification. I believe I was as much ac- 
 cepted when I first felt the free grace of God, in 
 the camp meeting wagon, homeward bound, as I 
 was under these extra manifestations. I give them 
 as circumstances in my experience. I had united 
 myself with the Church by giving my hand to the 
 venerable John Potts, in the absence of the preacher 
 in charge. There were, now, only three young men 
 in the Church in P. Louis Lasart, Henry Tatum, 
 A. M. Lorrain. We concluded that we might gain 
 
 much by forming ourselves into a band. We met 
 
 16
 
 186 THE CROSS. 
 
 first on one Sunday morning, in the meeting-house. 
 Louis was a Frenchman, but could talk tolerable 
 English. He had been raised a Roman Catholic, 
 and understood something about confession before 
 he was converted. And he understood, from our 
 Discipline, that, to be faithful to the band, we must 
 turn our hearts wrong side out. He began to tell 
 his experience, and presently came to a place where 
 he received a backset, while courting a young lady. 
 He must needs enter upon this narrative; and he 
 did it with so much sincerity and earnestness the 
 tears streaming down his cheeks while he entered 
 into particulars, laboring on in his broken English, 
 that Tatum and myself began to shake like aspen- 
 leaves. We found this would not do; and I told 
 them I thought we would do better in the classes 
 among the old folks. Ever since this I have been 
 opposed to young men's prayer meetings, or young 
 ladies' meetings. Old Christians, when they get 
 right happy, are simple and childish enough for 
 any thing. 
 
 I now lived a life of faith. My peace was like a 
 river. I had full confidence in the Church, and 
 esteemed all the brethren better than myself. I 
 looked upon the female members as sisters in all 
 purity; I can not express the celestial chastity with 
 which I regarded them so diverse from all I had 
 experienced before. Here let me ask, has any soul 
 ever walked in the light and power of their first 
 love for forty or fifty years without wavering? I
 
 CAMP MEETING. 187 
 
 do not ask if it can be done. The Bible, to me,, is 
 clear on this point: "The path of the just is as 
 the shining light, that shineth more and more unto 
 the perfect day." This is God's provision, but who 
 realizes it? Well may we say, "What troubles 
 have we seen, what trials have we passed!" The 
 preacher, having prepared to attend Conference, 
 proposed for me to lead his class in the middle of 
 the week. From this I shrunk back dismayed. But 
 he urged it so vehemently that I got alarmed at 
 my own obstinacy, and finally consented. As the 
 day advanced, the cross loomed up heavier and 
 heavier. I made it a matter of prayer, telling the 
 Lord that he knew I was not sufficient for that 
 work, and that I hoped no one would come. At 
 the appointed time I attended, and found the sex- 
 ton brushing the benches. We waited there a long 
 time, and, although it was a beautiful day, not one 
 member came. This filled me with gratitude; for I 
 verily believed my prayer was heard and I think 
 so still. Many a colt has been spoiled by prema- 
 ture harnessing.
 
 188 THE CROSS. 
 
 XIV. 
 
 NEW ORLEANS-FIRST SERMON. 
 
 I HAD now to look around for something to do. 
 I had been in a great measure weaned from the 
 sea, and determined to abandon it. No business 
 presented itself where I was. My oldest brother, 
 who was a counselor at law, in New Orleans, invited 
 me to come there; and I concluded to go. Brother 
 Potts, who received me into the Church, told my 
 mother he was sorry I had made that decision. 
 He did not see how a young Christian could stand 
 the seductions of New Orleans. He wished I could 
 continue on the sea. He thought that the power 
 of God, as displayed on the great deep, was calcu- 
 lated to cherish religious emotions in a soul already 
 under the influence of Divine grace. His views 
 influenced me considerably; so that, while on my 
 way to Norfolk to embark for New Orleans, I be- 
 came undecided and distressed. As soon as I 
 arrived at the hotel, some of my young sea-friends 
 crowded around, and one said in a loud voice, 
 " Why, L., we have heard that you have been con- 
 verted, and have joined the Methodists; is it so?" 
 I answered in a dignified tone, but as loud, "What 
 you have heard is certainly true."
 
 NEW ORLEANS FIRST SERMON. 189 
 
 "Well, that is curious, for a sailor to join the 
 Methodists!" 
 
 This gave me an opportunity to "show cause;" 
 and in a little while they began to slip away. The 
 gentlemen around looked at me as a curiosity, 
 smiling some, as I thought, with scorn some, 
 with approbation. I was still undecided in my 
 course. I attended the Methodist Church in the 
 evening. The introductory hymn was, 
 
 "God moves in a mysterious way, 
 His wonders to perform." 
 
 As they were singing, 
 
 " Ye fearful souls, fresh courage take, 
 
 The clouds ye so much dread 
 Are big with mercy, and shall break 
 In blessings on your head," 
 
 light, joy, and comfort came down, and my pathway 
 to New Orleans shone bright. An intelligent and 
 genteel young man, who belonged to the same vol- 
 unteer company that I did during the war, took 
 passage with me. I soon made known to him my 
 views and determinations; and although we some- 
 times disputed on doctrine, yet he always treated 
 me with great respect and consideration; and, as 
 we had the cabin to ourselves, we had an agreeable 
 voyage. When we arrived at the city, and looked 
 around, it seemed to be given up, to a great extent, 
 to idolatry. The holy Sabbath was generally un- 
 heeded, or made a day of merriment; and, so far 
 from being drawn into the vortex, my soul shrunk
 
 190 THE CROSS. 
 
 back from the gulf of immorality. I first got a 
 place under my brother, who had been appointed 
 naval-officer of the port. As he still attended to 
 his law business, he made me his deputy in the 
 revenue business, and the principal weight of that 
 concern rested upon me. This at once brought me 
 into business acquaintance with the merchants 
 French and English of that city; and happily, as 
 I thought, this was mostly the principal social con- 
 nection of that people. It was often said by strang- 
 ers, that, when they would inquire of a man if his 
 partner was a married man, he could not tell. 
 After the business of the day was over, I would 
 retire to my room, where I could read, meditate, 
 and pray, and enjoy the company of a very amiable 
 family that boarded me. 
 
 About this time Clarke's Notes were published in 
 pamphlet form, and I became a subscriber. It was 
 a great advantage that it came out periodically, so 
 that I could study each number in course. But I 
 longed for the preaching of the "Word. When I 
 saw my friends buying tickets for the theater once 
 or twice in the week, I felt how glad I would be 
 to hear sermons at the same price! We were not 
 entirely destitute of preaching; there was a gentle- 
 man of learning, who had been employed by some 
 to preach on the Sabbath, or rather to read. But 
 he was not regarded as an experimental Christian. 
 One Sunday in reading the morning service he 
 came nigh tilting over two or three times. This
 
 NEW ORLEANS FIRST SERMON. 191 
 
 startled the congregation. But when he ascended 
 the pulpit and spread out his manuscript, he began 
 to read; but after a while he looked very quizzi- 
 cally at his writing, and began to talk nonsense. 
 The people, who. seemed to have some idea about 
 ministerial decorum, poured out of the house in a 
 stream. A committee was appointed to investigate 
 the affair. They reported that the parson was not 
 intoxicated, as some had supposed, but had always 
 been in the habit of taking a little opium to im- 
 prove his elocution ; but as he had a particular sub- 
 ject on hand, he had that morning taken an over- 
 dose. A sea captain who was present, exclaimed, 
 "Worse and worse! we thought he had got drunk 
 on brandy or wine, like a Christian; but it seems 
 he got drunk on opium, like a Turk !" We, how- 
 ever, attended his ministry to set an example of 
 Church-going. One evening as I was going to my 
 lodging, I heard in the upper faubourg a Methodist 
 tune. It thrilled through my soul and body. And 
 although it was raining and the roads muddy, I 
 was determined to find it out. The sound brought 
 me to an old cabin. There was hardly a whole 
 pane in the windows; it was filled with Africans, 
 and a colored man who had come down in a flat- 
 boat was telling the simple story of the Cross. His 
 congregation rolled their eyes as if a new dispensa- 
 tion had opened upon them. I stood at the window 
 in the rain; and while the preacher was happy 
 within, my soul was happy without. Surely that
 
 192 THE CROSS. 
 
 was one of the richest evenings I had in the 
 South. Brethren who smile at this, may have 
 never known what it is to feel a famine of the 
 Word of God. 
 
 I had been two or three months in Orleans, be- 
 fore I discovered a Methodist in the place. It was 
 announced one Sunday that a Baptist missionary 
 would preach in the afternoon. He seemed to be 
 a plain, pious man, but only a slender preacher. 
 After dismissal I spoke to him, and he invited me 
 to take tea with him. The gentleman with whom 
 he stopped earnestly backed the invitation, and it 
 was accepted. In the course of the evening it ap- 
 peared that this gentleman was also a Baptist. I 
 was acquainted with him in business transactions, 
 but did not know that he was a professor of religion. 
 He informed me that he knew two very worthy 
 Methodists in the city, and directed me where to 
 find them. I lost no time in hunting them up. 
 These were old brother Nabb and his wife. Brother 
 Nabb and myself had often passed and repassed 
 each other, with mutual suspicious glances, but 
 neither had courage to challenge. He was a plain 
 German, had been there fourteen years before me, 
 and had been twice put in the calaboose for exhort- 
 ing the negroes on the levee to turn from the wrath 
 to come. By the means of this couple I found out 
 another Methodist. Now we began to muster our 
 forces. There were four Methodists, three or four 
 Baptists, and a few Presbyterians. We agreed to
 
 NEW ORLEANS FIEST SERMON. 193 
 
 establish a prayer meeting on one night in the 
 week, and to labor to gather up any religious per- 
 sons who might visit the city from time to time. 
 This prayer meeting was very singular, wavering 
 with the seasons and commerce. Sometimes the 
 large room was nearly filled ; at other times we 
 were reduced to our original number. Presently 
 we had an addition to the Methodists brother 
 Hyde, of New York, and Captain Pray, of Brook- 
 lyn, and their families. We now made a class, and 
 appointed Captain Pray leader. And the brethren 
 of other Churches attended; for, in the absence of 
 all preachers, we were firmly united. 
 
 After a while brother Pray said, "Brother L., 
 I have been deeply exercised about our condition 
 here. We are in no Conference, no district, no cir- 
 cuit; indeed, we are without the jurisdiction of 
 Methodism. We have called for help, and have 
 received none. It has lately struck me that the 
 Lord has placed some recourse within ourselves. 
 There is surely some one among us who ought to 
 feed these poor sheep." 
 
 To this I readily assented, and urged him to take 
 this matter in hand, as I knew, from his manner in 
 leading the class, that he would be acceptable. 
 This, he said, was not what he was aiming at by 
 any means; but in looking over the society, he con- 
 cluded I was the man. I told him he was certainly 
 mistaken, as I was not sufficient for that thing. 
 
 He, however, renewed this kind of talk from time 
 
 17
 
 194 THE CROSS. 
 
 to time, till one Sunday morning, when the class 
 was met, and our friends of other Churches were 
 present, he took me out into the back porch, and 
 said he would decide my case on the answer of a 
 single question: "Knowing you to be a man of 
 truth, answer me before God if you have had no 
 impressions on your mind that it is your duty to 
 preach?" Here he drove me into a corner. I ac- 
 knowledged that this was the case, but argued that 
 the American population of that city was uncom- 
 monly intelligent, considering their number; and I 
 had thought, if my impression was Divine, that the 
 providence of God would open a way to some people 
 who might be benefited by my talents, poor as they 
 were. Now he became urgent for me to go into 
 the class-room, and preach a short sermon. Sup- 
 posing that, after hearing me, he would be better 
 satisfied with letting me alone, I promised on con- 
 dition of his taking it up in case of failure. So, 
 after getting my mind somewhat composed, I took 
 the Book and gave out as a text, "What I say 
 unto you, I say unto all, watch." I spoke about 
 thirty minutes, and then slunk back into my seat, 
 supposing he would stop all leaks, and clap on a 
 few backstays or bobstays; but he rose up, and 
 very coolly observed, " Next Sunday evening, 
 brother L. will preach in my large upper 
 room." I expostulated with him, after meeting, 
 but he said, "It's all right." I told him, as the 
 appointment was out, I would try to meet it, but
 
 NEW ORLEANS FIRST SERMON. 195 
 
 he really must not rush me on in that way. Our 
 people told all their acquaintances, and next Sun- 
 day evening there was a large congregation. We 
 had hardly closed before "Next Sunday evening" 
 was again heard. And so it went on till the house 
 became crowded. But now we received the joyful 
 intelligence that a Methodist missionary, for New 
 Orleans, had left Baltimore. Our little society was 
 glad, but none so glad as myself. He got there 
 late one Saturday afternoon. On Sunday even- 
 ing our usual place of worship was crowded. I 
 held back till late, and then slipped into the back 
 of the congregation, where I might hear with- 
 out let or hinderance. The missionary was at the 
 stand, frequently looking at his watch. At last he 
 stretched forward his head, and said, "Is brother 
 L. in the congregation?" "Yes," said one, "here 
 he is, back here." "I wish to see him." Sup- 
 posing he only wanted me to close the service, I 
 walked forward. 
 
 "Brother, it is high time to begin." 
 "I think it is." 
 
 "Well, you had better go at it." 
 This astonished me, and I very decidedly de- 
 clined, telling him that the whole congregation was 
 expecting to hear him; that they had been for 
 years without any regular ministry, and it would 
 be a great disappointment if he did not preach. 
 
 " Well, if you do n't intend to preach, get up and 
 tell them so, and dismiss them, or I will do it for
 
 196 . THE CROPS. 
 
 you. It is your appointment, and I assure you I 
 shall not preach this night." 
 
 I reflected a moment, and saw clearly that such 
 a course would greatly injure him at the commence- 
 ment. And I preached, but fully resolved that no 
 more such pranks should be played with me, and 
 that my sermons should be few and far between dur- 
 ing his administrations. Happy was I in the con- 
 sideration that I had no more appointments out. 
 But I knew not my man.
 
 DIVEES LABORS. 197 
 
 XV. 
 
 LAND-OFFICE RECEIVER-DIVERS 
 LABORS. 
 
 BROTHER Mark Moore was considerably advanced 
 in years. He was a classical man, deeply pious, 
 generally a good preacher, and sometimes overwhelm- 
 ing. He was, however, subject to a very troublous 
 disease the hypo. He did not at all recognize it, 
 but in all good conscience pronounced it sickness. 
 He held a theory that the earthquake, like the 
 comet, had its appointed race; that in former ages 
 it trampled furiously across our continent, as may 
 be seen by the deep dells, precipices, and scattered 
 rocks that abound in our country; that it was now 
 playing its game beyond seas, but would very soon 
 visit this part of its orbit again. Then he would 
 start, look wildly, woe-begone, and say, " Brother 
 L., do you feel that?" 
 
 "What?" 
 
 "Why, the trembling of the earth. I feel it 
 every few days, and just now distinctly. I am sur- 
 prised that you can not feel such a sensible move." 
 
 "Brother Moore, you are certainly mistaken; the 
 earth never was more solid." 
 
 "It is you who are mistaken. I have a peculiar
 
 198 THE CROSS. 
 
 discernment of earthquakes." "When he was in this 
 mood all was over with him; he was sick, and man 
 Friday had to stand up. 
 
 Our little society now began to stir. A gentle- 
 man who was friendly to our Church, and whose 
 wife was a Methodist, offered us the upper part of 
 a large tobacco warehouse, on condition of our fit- 
 ting it up, as a preaching-place, with the privilege 
 of our removing our improvements, if the property 
 had to pass from his hands. The room was 100 
 by 80. We purchased heavy cotton, and nailed 
 it to the posts that supported the rafters on both 
 sides, put up a pulpit draped in baize, and then put 
 up stairs, outside of the building, by which our con- 
 gregation might ascend. The returned captives 
 were not more pestered in putting up the temple 
 at Jerusalem than we were. Some said one thing, 
 and some said another; but the majority thought 
 it was an immense object. No respectable person 
 would attend, and what lady would climb up the 
 steep, open stairway. All we could say was, "Not 
 many great, not many noble, not many mighty are 
 called." But when worship was opened, they came 
 crowding from north, south, east, and west. The 
 ladies tripped up stairs right gracefully; for there 
 were no hoops worn in that day. Mr. M n, bless 
 you, the king merchant of New Orleans, came bust- 
 ling up with all his family, and looked right glad 
 to get a seat ; and brother Moore laid the vast con- 
 gregation under contribution of tears. I should
 
 DIVERS LABORS. 199 
 
 not have blamed him if he had felt the earth quake 
 that day. I had not been long in New Orleans, 
 when the commission of "Receiver of public mon- 
 eys for lands of the United States in the Eastern 
 District of Louisiana" was sent me by Mr. Madison. 
 I had to get security to the amount of thirty thou- 
 sand dollars. 
 
 "Now," said my brother, "where will you get 
 that?" 
 
 " I am acquainted with a Baptist gentleman who 
 is very wealthy, and professes strong friendship for 
 me." 
 
 "If that is all your dependence, I am sorry for 
 you; but go and try." 
 
 I called on my friend, and told him I was ap- 
 pointed to the Land- Office. 
 
 "0, how glad I am! you will now be perma- 
 nently fixed among us." 
 
 "Yes, but I have to give security in thirty thou- 
 sand dollars; and I have called to see if you could 
 accommodate me. It is only a nominal thing, the 
 security, as the lands in this district will not be 
 sold for many years, and we will only receive our 
 regular salary." 
 
 Here his countenance fell, and he said he could 
 not go my security in whole or in part. 
 
 " But if I do not get this security, brother, I will 
 lose this fine office." 
 
 "I shall be very sorry indeed for that, but I can 
 not accommodate you."
 
 200 THE CROSS. 
 
 When I returned, my brother laughed heartily 
 at me. "Now," said he, "I will go out and try 
 my luck. It is. certainly a very heavy security." 
 As he passed down the street, he met a very dis- 
 tinguished lawyer, who hooked arms with him, and 
 wished him to go with him. My brother told him 
 he would like to do so, but he had set out to pro- 
 cure security for his brother, who had just been 
 appointed to the Land-Office. "Why, I did not 
 know you had a brother. Come along; 1 11 go his 
 security." This afforded my brother great amuse- 
 ment, and myself some mortification. When my 
 friend asked me if I had got that security, and I 
 told him yes, a gentleman who had never yet seen 
 me kindly offered to go my security, he looked 
 comical too. 
 
 Mr. Larned, a young Presbyterian minister from 
 the East, preached a few times in the city, and was 
 employed by the Presbyterians and their adherents. 
 He was a very amiable young man, highly polished, 
 and of popular manners. He went home to prepare 
 for a permanent residence. He returned in the ship 
 on a Sabbath, and the people generally expected he 
 would occupy our tabernacle. This was not known 
 to brother Moore, and he, of course, prepared to 
 preach. Here was saddled on me, perhaps, the 
 heaviest cross I had to bear in the morning of my 
 experience. Just before brother Moore began, here 
 came in Mr. Larned and all his staff, and the house 
 was well filled. Our preacher had asked him in
 
 DIVERS LABORS. 
 
 the pulpit, and a considerable conversation passed 
 between them. Presently the preacher requested 
 that brother L. would come in the stand. I had got 
 to understand some of his facial expressions, and 
 moved up with some considerable timidity. 
 
 "Here, brother L., you will have to preach this 
 afternoon." 
 
 " 0, not at all, brother ! Here is brother Lamed. 
 All the congregation expects him to preach." 
 
 "No, brother L., I have been several weeks 
 knocking about at sea, and I have nothing in the 
 world to preach." 
 
 I could not comprehend this reason how these 
 several weeks of perfect leisure on the solitude of 
 the ocean should incapacitate him. I looked up to 
 brother Moore, and saw that his "sickness" was 
 upon him, and the prospect hopeless. In the mean 
 time, Larned seized me by the arm, and pulled me 
 up. I will not say, reader, that there was nothing 
 like natural spunk creeping over my nerves. I 
 rose up and preached; yes, through mercy, I 
 preached. There are times when men may speak 
 honestly of themselves. When our Lord said of 
 Nathaniel, and to his face, "Behold an Israel- 
 ite, indeed, in whom there is no guile," Nathaniel 
 asked with childish innocence, "How knowest thou 
 me?" He felt himself that he was without guile; 
 but the curiosity with him was how the Savior 
 knew it. So, laying aside all voluntary humility, 
 I carried the rag off from the bush that day.
 
 202 THE CROSS. 
 
 Some, who were not in the habit of going to 
 church, said, "Does the Deputy preach?" Others 
 said, "Well, if we can raise up preachers from 
 among us, where is the necessity of importation?" 
 Brother Moore was well pleased for more than one 
 reason; and he lectured me severely on my diffi- 
 dence, and finally said I was a greater preacher 
 than Mr. Larned. 
 
 "Why, what do you mean?" 
 
 "I mean that, although you are not so flowery, 
 and so well drilled in elocution, yet if each of you 
 were required to preach on a text you had never 
 thought of, you would beat him." 
 
 This made me feel cheap, under a consciousness 
 that my sermon was not the impulse of the moment. 
 I had been plowing with Adam Clarke, and had 
 learned that it was a shame for a minister to say, 
 "I am not prepared." And as I was liable to so 
 many traps, I had concluded always to have at 
 least a frame-work standing in my mind ready for 
 clapboarding and shingling; and I thought that 
 Mr. Larned could almost shake sermons out "of his 
 coat sleeve. A little while after I was speaking to 
 a lady of a beautiful sermon he had preached on 
 the Sabbath. She smiled, and said, "It was very 
 pretty, but you had the advantage of me in hearing 
 it." "Why?" "You know his office adjoins my 
 room, and I heard it preached six times last 
 week once a day as audibly as I heard it on 
 Sabbath." This labor of love did not lessen my
 
 DIVERS LABORS. 203 
 
 esteem for him, but it disabused me of the idea of 
 his preaching without labor. One Sabbath he 
 preached on the unconditional perseverance of the 
 saints. His argument was a Christian might com- 
 mit any crime in the catalogue of human vices "he 
 may steal, get drunk, yea, murder, if he will; but 
 here is our stronghold no child of God can will to 
 do such things." On going home I saw him seated 
 in the open parlor of a Presbyterian lady ; he hailed 
 me, and asked me to step in. 
 
 "How did you like my doctrine to-day?" 
 
 "You know, of course, we Methodists don't be- 
 lieve a word of it." 
 
 ""Where was it deficient?" 
 
 "You said a child of God might get drunk or 
 even murder." 
 
 "Yes, but observe 'if he will;' but it is morally 
 impossible for him to will." 
 
 "Do you not believe David was a child of God?" 
 
 "Yes." 
 
 "But David sinned" 
 
 Here the Presbyterian sister rushed out of the 
 other room, and said, "Yes, brother L., you have 
 him there; for David did actually commit adul- 
 tery with Uriah's wife." This raised a laugh and 
 blush from both of us, and lest the lady, in her 
 vehemence, should enter into particulars, I fled 
 quite pleased with handling him in this "shorter 
 way." 
 
 Mr. Larned was of a handsome exterior, and had
 
 204 THE CROSS. 
 
 he lived a few years would have been the brightest 
 shaft in the ministerial quiver of the Presbyterian 
 Church. But, alas! he finished his course in two 
 years, lamented by all. 
 
 To finish this sketch. At the General Conference 
 in Boston, being sent to assist a Presbyterian min- 
 ister, in one of the suburban villages, as we were 
 sitting in his study I saw a small picture hanging 
 over the mantle-piece; approaching closer, I ex- 
 claimed, "My friend Larned!" There he was, in 
 all the bloom and beauty of youth, though nearly 
 fifty years had intervened. 
 
 We were getting rich in preachers now. The 
 Baptist minister still labored among us. He heard 
 me preach one day, and afterward called to see 
 me no doubt with the kindest intention, for he" 
 was a good man and in a very delicate way began 
 to show me wherein I had perpetrated heresy. And 
 as our Churches were just organized, it became us 
 to watch over each other in love. 
 
 "Wherein have I erred from the truth?" 
 
 "Why, we have judged, from your sermon, that 
 you do not believe in the preexistence of Jesus 
 Christ." 
 
 " We believe firmly in his divinity." 
 
 " Yes ; but you do not believe in the eternal 
 existence of his humanity." 
 
 "Certainly not." 
 
 He labored hard to recover me; and finally, wax- 
 ing warm, he notified me that he would make known
 
 DIVERS LABORS. 205 
 
 his discovery to my minister : " He will correct it, 
 and put an end to this error." 
 
 He laid in his charge to brother Moore : " Brother 
 L. does not believe that the humanity of Christ is 
 from all eternity." 
 
 "Do you believe it?" 
 
 "Yes." 
 
 " Well, my dear brother, you are in error. And 
 if you were charged before the Baptist Church, and 
 would not recant, they would expel you." 
 
 He took considerable pains to put him right, and 
 the Baptist minister, before he left, requested to let 
 it "fall in the water," as the French say. 
 
 There were some colored people in the city who 
 used to be Methodists, and they applied to our 
 Church to give them a leader, as they were not 
 permitted to meet without a white man of char- 
 acter. No one among our white members was will- 
 ing to take up this cross. After considering the 
 thing in all its bearings, although the most public 
 man among them, I consented to lead them. This 
 class grew fast. The masters generally would give 
 them a certificate that they were willing to put 
 them under my religious instruction. They were 
 as pious a band of Africans as ever assembled 
 together. Eeligion seemed to be their all. They 
 hired an indifferent building at a very extravagant 
 rate. When the day would come to raise their 
 quarterly rent, after meeting they would march up 
 to the stand, and almost cover it with notes and
 
 206 THE CROSS. 
 
 silver money they had earned on Saturday, or by 
 privileges their owners had accorded them. Some, 
 from their appearance, needed the money them- 
 selves; but they seemed to plank it down with 
 great glee. I never saw the like among whites or 
 blacks, except in Honnold's settlement, on the 
 Zanesville circuit. When they would come up, on 
 the day appointed for the collection of quarterage, 
 and almost cover the table with their money, it 
 would always carry my mind back to my Orleans 
 Blues. It was rather a fearful work to lead this 
 class. Many would stop and eavesdrop during the 
 exercises. One day a powerful-built man seemed 
 to get very happy, and wound up in a voice that 
 might have been heard half through the square, 
 "Glory be to God] we will take New Orleans yet." 
 This made me tremble, and I peeped out of the 
 window. 
 
 One of our class was a preacher, and quite popu- 
 lar among his fellow-servants; and when he joined 
 the Baptists they were greatly aggrieved. The 
 Baptist missionary had an immense crowd to see 
 the immersion. But Hawkins shook off the muddy 
 water of the Mississippi, and returned to his own 
 company, and said he was all Methodist, only he 
 wanted to be dipped. Our colored class became 
 very large before I left the place.
 
 LICENSED TO PEEACH. 207 
 
 XVI. 
 
 LICENSED TO PREACH-LIFE IN 
 NEW ORLEANS. 
 
 HEARING that the Mississippi Conference was to 
 sit, about thirty miles beyond the lake, the society 
 delegated me to attend it, and, if possible, to per- 
 suade the Bishop to come over to our city and see 
 the society. My brother wishing to cross the lake, 
 we rigged up one of our revenue boats, and sailed 
 over. When I arrived at the house where the 
 Conference was to assemble, it was found that we 
 had mistaken the time by one week. But the 
 brother who owned the farm insisted on my stay- 
 ing. The farm was surrounded by a dense forest, 
 as far as I could see, of several miles, and seemed 
 to me a dreary solitude; but while walking down 
 the lane, in the evening hour, meditating like Isaac, 
 but not under the same expectation, Bishop M'Ken- 
 dree and his traveling companions hove in view. 
 He was much surprised at finding me in that 
 region, as the last time he saw me was in old Vir- 
 ginia, and not grown. When the Conference assem- 
 bled, there were about seventeen preachers. The 
 most of them were entertained by our farmer- 
 brother with princely kindness; and, as the session
 
 208 THE CROSS. 
 
 was held in his house, we had not far to walk. I 
 had never encountered Methodist ministers in a 
 body. As they had met me singly they appeared 
 of very solemn aspect. I was not prepared to ap- 
 preciate the high key to which their nerves were 
 strung by a joyful meeting, after twelve months of 
 excessive labor, and long good behavior, and their 
 spicy wit and jovial jokes almost gave me offense, 
 and I came very near concluding that I was about 
 the best man there except the Bishop. A number 
 of us slept in one room, and, while I was saying 
 my prayers, one raised up his head and said, 
 " Brother, if you do n't hurry on that prayer, you 
 will be left in the dark, for your candle is 'most 
 out;" and he really kept his ear up, as if he ex- 
 pected an answer. The Bishop finally concluded he 
 could not go with me to New Orleans, nor could he 
 tell when we would have a visitation. A few days 
 after our return, he, in company with brother 
 Winans, suddenly appeared among us. One day, 
 while seated in a private house among several 
 members, male and female he said, with his own 
 peculiar smile, "Brethren, I pronounce this a quar- 
 terly conference. You are in no Conference, no 
 district, no circuit. I say this is a quarterly con- 
 ference ; and, if any object, or dispute my authority, 
 show your objections." 
 
 "No objections. Well, if you have any business, 
 bring it forward." 
 
 One said, "We have not much business, but we
 
 LIFE IN NEW ORLEANS. 209 
 
 wish brother L. licensed. I immediately rose up 
 and said, "I had made no such request." "Well, 
 brother, you will not set up your judgment against 
 the Church." The vote was put, and the Bishop 
 wrote my first license. This was the way they 
 made me a preacher; but I have always contended 
 that I was a preacher before they touched me. 
 
 My eldest brother, Edwin, was residing in the 
 city before I went there. The brother next younger 
 than myself, Thomas, soon moved there, and pub- 
 lished a popular paper, which kept a strict oversight 
 of the city fathers and sanitary officers mostly 
 French who cared very little about the cleanliness 
 of the place, because they knew that what would 
 poison Americans would fatten themselves. They, 
 however, subscribed liberally to the paper, to learn 
 what was said about them; and our labor was not 
 in vain. My third and youngest brother, John, 
 who was an artist, came out last, and got a profit- 
 able place in the custom-house. My manner of liv- 
 ing was on the bachelor order, which was pretty 
 much the ruling order in .those days. We might 
 give a specimen of our fixings and rambles. 
 
 In order to secure an occasional retreat from the 
 busy scenes of life, I fitted up a small building, 
 which stood in a retired situation, behind my broth- 
 er's printing-office. It was so surrounded by loftier 
 tenements, as to throw the incessant rattling of 
 drays and noisy hum of men in the dull distance. 
 
 We have nothing romantic to record concerning the 
 
 18
 
 210 THE CROSS. 
 
 house of our pilgrimage. There was no spreading 
 beech, with "old fantastic roots" no cooling fount- 
 ains no well-dressed garden, breathing rich per- 
 fumes; but, contrariwise, Jamestown weed and dqg- 
 fennel, of luxurious growth. It was, however, a 
 place of comparative quietude; and that was all to 
 me. It was no light task to establish a closet in 
 the Crescent City ; and, moreover, to make a full con- 
 fession "my public shame my solitary pride!" 
 I made poetry in those days. A novice would say, 
 "The cloud-capped mountains, the flowery vale, the 
 embowered garden, perspiring celestial fragrance " 
 these are the scenes where the Muses love to frolic, 
 and dispense their richest favors. But sour ex- 
 perience says, Nay. The somber and unfurnished 
 room, where no "woodbines flaunt no roses shed a 
 couch" where sweat and ink ooze in close affinity 
 where, indeed, there is no production of nature or 
 art to rival, in beauty, Webster's Dictionary there 
 is the palace of song, the factory of poesy. Well, 
 here we wrought till we found that all the best 
 rhyming words were used up, and there was no 
 new jingle under the sun. This will, by and by, be 
 the case in regard to prose. The only advantage it 
 has now, is, that the rhymeless words are in the 
 majority, and, consequently, can run more changes 
 and transpositions. But as the words are finite, 
 and men and women will talk and write perpetually, 
 there must come a time when they will have to stop, 
 not only for "lack of argument," but lack of sound,
 
 LIFE IN NEW ORLEANS. 211 
 
 unless they go on, as our poets now do, not knowing 
 they are mere echoes. This is our comfort in regard 
 to the novelists. When they have made all the lies 
 that can be shaped in the English language, then 
 will their end come. 
 
 But, if this is the case, it behooves us, also, to 
 "make hay while the sun shines." So to return to 
 our narrative. A high board-fence separated my 
 homestead from a building of similar structure. 
 Who lived there whether they were English or 
 Irish whites or quadroons, were questions which 
 did not concern us. We used, then, to live strictly 
 up to the good rule, "Let not your left hand know 
 what your right hand doeth." We Southerners 
 were not busy-bodies in other men's matters. A 
 certain new-comer, in remarking on this singularity, 
 said that, in questioning a merchant closely, in 
 regard to the domestic matters of his partner, he 
 could not tell him whether he was a single or mar- 
 ried man. We suspect, however, that he would 
 not, for this simple reason it was nobody's busi- 
 ness, and the unmannerly stranger was breaking in 
 upon our order of things. This habit might seem 
 unsocial in some; but it is abundantly better than 
 the gossiping and backbiting of some folks, who 
 attend to every body's business better than they do 
 to their own. 
 
 On one occasion, however, I was compelled to pry 
 into my neighbor's matters. On Christmas eve I 
 had retired earlier than usual, and had begun to
 
 212 THE CROSS. 
 
 doze comfortably, when I was disturbed by a low, 
 murmuring sound of distress, occasionally mingled 
 with groans and sobs. The little gate was ever and 
 anon swinging on its hinges; and every new visitor 
 seemed to swell the tide of woe. This did not make 
 me unhappy; it only roused my sympathy, and 
 turned the tide of thought into a more serious and 
 mournful channel; for, in those days of youthful 
 piety, whether I wept with those who wept, or smiled 
 with those who smiled, still my God was with me, 
 and I had peace within. It is true, even then, I 
 had heard of the "hypo" with the hearing of the 
 ear; but I had placed it in the catalogue of "Old 
 Wives' Fables." I said to myself, "Can this be a 
 wake?" Stealing softly from my bed, and peeping 
 through the fence, I saw the house was brilliantly 
 lit up, the doors and windows spread wide open, 
 and there was a corpse, surrounded by relatives 
 and friends, who had come to weep with the house- 
 hold. My heart was touched; for never had I wit- 
 nessed grief more sincere more natural. Having 
 again retired, I soon fell asleep; but not so soundly 
 as to be wholly unconscious of what was passing 
 around. The weeping and the wailing mingled with 
 my dreaming fancies: the earth seemed to be float- 
 ing in a sea of tears, and charity and faith were 
 still in wild disordered exercise. 
 
 About midnight the clock began to strike. At 
 every stroke the tempest of sorrow rose higher and 
 higher. "Nine, ten, eleven, twelve!" Just then
 
 LIFE IN NEW OELEANS. 213 
 
 the afflicted crowd broke loose in one united, and, 
 as I felt, infernal laugh. They sprang to their feet, 
 and danced, and fiddled, and romped, and laughed 
 again, louder and still louder. My mind, in the. 
 mean time, took a complete somerset, and I ex- 
 claimed, "Surely the devil's abroad in the land!" 
 I felt that he was rummaging in every corner of 
 my room, rolling and tittering under my bed, try- 
 ing to scramble up into my soul, whether I would 
 or not. My flesh crawled the hair of my head 
 seemed to rise. I sprang from my bed, with my 
 eyes shut, of course, for I strangely felt that the 
 testimony of sight was all that was lacking in 
 bringing me in open and manifest contact with the 
 "wicked one" I hastily threw on my clothes, and 
 rushed into the street, slamming the door behind 
 me, and hastened to leave the unnatural merriment. 
 The cool and bracing air of midnight, so peculiar to 
 Orleans, pressed my throbbing temples with its 
 friendly breath, and seemed to whisper, "How 
 mean, how niggardly mean, that the devil could not 
 allow one poor Christian, and he 'less than the 
 least,' the small space of six feet by three, within 
 the* bounds of his nocturnal range!" The enemy 
 might have had more to do with my heart on other 
 occasions; but never before had I realized such an 
 experimental verity of his presence in proper 
 person. 
 
 I passed on to a region of quietude; for there is 
 commonly an hour or two of silence, out of twenty-
 
 214 THE CROSS. 
 
 four, even in that babbling city that conventicle 
 of every language and every faith. As I passed 
 down by the great church, the door being ajar, I 
 discovered that there was a light within. Prompt- 
 ed by curiosity, I slipped in, and beheld an unusual 
 sight. In one corner of the church had been 
 erected a manger a rough temporary shed, such as 
 we find connected with almost every cabin in new 
 settlements. About a cart-load of straw was piled 
 in the center. Two animals, of the size of a New- 
 foundland dog, in carved work, were stationed on 
 the right and left. It would have saved strangers 
 an abundance of perplexity, if the artist -had 
 printed on one, "The ox," and on the other, "The 
 ass." But, as I had some idea of the drift of it, it 
 was made out. Joseph and Mary were as large as 
 life, and dressed in royal robes, richly spangled 
 with gold and silver, and sparkling jewels, suffi- 
 ciently imposing as we thought to have secured 
 a reception at the inn, if the Roman emperor and 
 all his tetrarchs had been guests. The blessed Vir- 
 gin was placed, according to our Protestant notions, 
 in a very improper attitude, and the babe presented 
 a strange appearance. Two angels were perched 
 upon the eaves of the shed, and gazing on the 
 group below. I was soon satisfied with the poorly- 
 contrived fixment, and would have retired; but 
 thinking it was more tolerable than the loud Satanic 
 "ha! ha!" that had dispossessed me of my lodgings, 
 I concluded to sit down to see the end of the mat-
 
 LIFE IN NEW ORLEANS. 215 
 
 ter. As the day began to dawn, the entry and 
 aisles became vocal with the prattling of infantile 
 devotees groups of smiling children, bearing their 
 offerings to the consecrated manger. It was divert- 
 ing to see their buoyant and exulting joy when 
 they first saw the babe. Candies, raisins, kisses, 
 cakes, and other sacrifices, all costly, no doubt, in 
 their young imagination, were freely thrown into 
 the manger, till the straw was almost hid under 
 the profusion of "good things" that had been show- 
 ered upon it. That morning's exhibition lightened 
 my mind of one mystery which had been hanging 
 about it. At other religious festivals we had seen 
 some of our fellow-citizens, who were evidently men 
 of strong minds, liberal education, and polished 
 manners, who nevertheless succumbed to the most 
 disgusting idolatry. How they could, allowing them 
 to be sincere which of necessity we did be so 
 grossly imposed on, we could not conceive. But 
 here it was all revealed. This manifest idolatry 
 was planted in infancy. It had grown with their 
 growth, strengthened with their strength. It had 
 been entwined with all the associations of their 
 younger, brighter, and happier days. If error, 
 which has no countenance in reason or revelation, 
 by an early lodgment in the human breast, be- 
 comes so immovable, that even high attainments in 
 science can not displace it, how industrious ought 
 parents to be in fixing in the infant's mind the om- 
 nipotent truths of the everlasting Gospel! These
 
 216 THE CROSS. 
 
 juvenile exercises continued till after sunrise, when, 
 I suppose, they melted away "like the morning 
 cloud;" for I found, about noon, that the manger of 
 Bethlehem, with the ox and the ass, and all its in- 
 mates and appurtenances, had fled, and made room 
 for other idols and older worshipers. I retired to 
 my lowly domicile, found the atmosphere more pure, 
 the malign influence all gone, and spent there many 
 an hour of piety and peace "prayer being my 
 chief business all my pleasure praise." Some may 
 smile at my sore wrestling with powers and princi- 
 palities; but, hark ye, I do not say the devil was 
 actually in my hermitage. I only state my feelings 
 pending that sudden and inhuman transition from 
 what I conceived to be the most sincere and heart- 
 felt sorrow, to a revelry unparalleled, as I thought, 
 in all the fiendish orgies on mercy's side of hell. 
 Neither dare I deny that he was there. It might 
 please a class; but what should I gain thereby? 
 The boon which the dying fox would have inherited 
 by the kind interference of his friends a fresh 
 swarm of bees and flies. There are still many, who, 
 with the open Bible in their hands, would dispute 
 with me the very personality of the devil. More- 
 over, I like to anger infidelity by exercising every 
 kind of credulity that can be possibly fastened on 
 the Scriptures. 
 
 As my place in the naval office made it necessary 
 for me to sign the clearance of every vessel, the 
 secretary of the Bible Society kept me supplied
 
 LIFE IN NEW ORLEANS. 217 
 
 with a large stock of Bibles, in every modern lan- 
 guage, for gratuitous distribution to such captains 
 who were destitute. I enjoyed much in this work, 
 and also some persecution. One day I presented a 
 copy to a lake captain. His face at once flushed 
 up, and he cursed heartily, and said, 
 
 "If you would give me a volume of Shakspeare, 
 or something of that kind, I would read it." 
 
 I felt hurt, and I suppose he saw it. Before he 
 reached the city again an awful storm of intense 
 coldness swept the coast and lakes. Several of 
 the lake craft went ashore, and some crews were 
 found frozen to their posts. When my thundering 
 skipper came into the office again, after his papers 
 were signed, he stood silent with his eyes fixed on 
 my pile of Bibles. At last he said in a subdued tone, 
 
 "When I was here last, you kindly presented me 
 a Bible, and I roughly and wickedly rejected it; 
 but I have been brought to feel the need of such a 
 book on board, and if you will be so kind as to 
 make me the offer again, I would gladly accept it." 
 
 But in most cases the Bible was gratefully re- 
 ceived. A German captain, who commanded a large 
 merchantman, came to clear one day. I held out to 
 him a fine family Bible, in German, and asked him 
 if he would accept of it. He understood English 
 very imperfectly. "Why, that is the very thing I 
 have long been wanting." Seeing that he misun- 
 derstood me, and expected to pay, I told him we 
 
 charged him nothing. 
 
 19
 
 218 THE CROSS. 
 
 He jumped back, and exclaimed, "0, no, you 
 can not afford that." I explained to him that there 
 was a large society that supplied us with them to 
 give away. He pressed the book to him, and said, 
 
 " Is it possible that in a world like this, there can 
 be found so many generous men generous even to 
 foreigners that they have never seen? Pray, sir, 
 let me express my gratitude to you. I have two 
 or three cases of my costly Holland gin on board, 
 put up in highly-finished bottles. I will send a 
 case down to your office." 
 
 "0, no, captain, I am only the distributer; they 
 cost me nothing, and, besides, there are a great 
 many men in this country who never drink spirit- 
 uous liquor." 
 
 At this he stretched his eyes still wider, exclaim- 
 ing, "What a country!" 
 
 It is a matter of sincere regret that even in this 
 enlightened age of Christianity, while the Gospel of 
 Christ, the kingdom of the Babe of Bethlehem, is 
 spreading its victorious march, and waving its 
 blood-stained banner over almost every nation, there 
 should be found men professedly religious who 
 not only neglect the Sacred Volume themselves, but 
 would prevent others from receiving its saving 
 teachings. The Popes of Home, in their imaginary 
 holiness, have denounced the Bible Society as an 
 enemy who is sowing tares among wheat. When we 
 think of the awful consequences these unhappy men 
 are drawing down upon their guilty heads, our
 
 LIFE IN NEW ORLEANS. 219 
 
 souls tremble for those consequences; but when we 
 reflect how fragile and nugatory are all their at- 
 tempts to impede the progress of Divine truth, or 
 to prevent the glory of the Gospel, we are led to 
 laugh at all their fruitless efforts. Jehovah himself 
 will hold such characters in derision, and if they 
 repent not of their folly, he will laugh at their ca- 
 lamity, and mock when their fear cometh. Blessed 
 be God, the age of unsanctified profession has passed 
 away. The kingdom of God is still advancing, 
 lengthening its cord and strengthening its stake. 
 The temple of the Lord Jesus is rising upon the 
 ruins of demolished idolatry, and will rise till its 
 holy steeple will pierce the heavens, and the topstone 
 itself be brought forth with shouting, crying grace 
 unto it!
 
 220 THE CROSS. 
 
 XVII. 
 
 LEAVE NEW ORLEANS-SCHOOL-TEACH- 
 INGCAMP MEETING. 
 
 As I was so favorably situated at New Orleans, 
 both as it regarded my spiritual and temporal in- 
 terests, it might be proper to say something about 
 the circumstances that led to my removal. My 
 oldest brother, the only one of us who was married, 
 in returning from a visit to Virginia, brought a 
 sister along with him as far as Lexington, in Ken- 
 tucky, when finding the Ohio River so low that he 
 was obliged to take to a skiff, he left her there. 
 When he got home, it was determined that I should 
 go up for her, hoping that before my arrival the 
 river would be up. The steamboat on which I em- 
 barked could get no higher than the mouth of 
 the Ohio, and I was under the necessity of walking 
 up to Louisville, in order to take the stage for Lex- 
 ington. 
 
 It was a very singular Fall. The woods in Ken- 
 tucky, Virginia, and as far as we could hear from, 
 were all on fire. Although Indian Summer, the 
 sun was not seen for several weeks. In traveling 
 through the forests, we would often have fire' on 
 both sides of the road, and sometimes we had to
 
 LEAVE NEW ORLEANS. 221 
 
 wait till a tree, nearly severed by fire, had fallen. 
 At other times, after nice calculation, we would 
 venture to run past, just in time to hear the crash 
 behind. Sometimes we would get out of the fiery, 
 stifling region, but be waked up in the night by 
 the cry of "Turn out to fight the fire!" And here 
 it would be coming like a mighty army, crackling, 
 roaring, and spitting, as it were, tongues of fire, 
 far ahead. In some parts it enveloped fences, barns, 
 stacks, and even dwelling-houses. It was a hard 
 matter for several miles to get a drink of water. 
 Some had to haul it eight miles. When I arrived 
 at Louisville, the> whole atmosphere was filled with 
 smoke and dark ashes. I brought my sister from 
 Lexington, to wait the rise of the river. As we 
 came out of a Methodist prayer meeting in the 
 evening, my sister said, 
 
 "Brother, the man who closed the meeting is a 
 tailor." 
 
 "How do you know he is a tailor, Angelina?" 
 
 "Why, did you not hear him say, in giving out 
 his appointments, ' We must cut our pattern accord- 
 ing to our cloth V " 
 
 "Well," said I, "whether he is a tailor or not, 
 I '11 go and see him to-morrow, and see if he can 
 board us, for the river may not rise this Winter, 
 and I like his looks very much." 
 
 We found out his name, and set out in the morn- 
 ing to find his house. When we came to his door, 
 and saw the style of the house, we at once despaired
 
 222 THE CROSS. 
 
 of getting board, but thought he might recommend 
 us to some pious family. We rang, and brother 
 Overstreet appeared. We made known to him our 
 circumstances, and he kindly smiled, and said, 
 
 " I have never taken boarders yet, but I think I 
 will have to take you two." 
 
 We found this family to be the kindest we over 
 found away from home. 
 
 The river did not rise before Spring. Brother 
 Overstreet was a man of great sociability, and 
 would often invite young company to spend the 
 evening with the strangers. One thing that struck 
 me particularly was the size of the Kentucky girls. 
 In one large room full there was not one but what 
 was far above medium hight. They plagued my 
 little sister a great deal, by saying that Virginia 
 did not produce as large corn as Kentucky, and 
 they reckoned the reason why she did not come up 
 to the mark was, she was raised on dodgers made 
 out of nubbins. I preached but seldom here. The 
 Church at that time was ranged into two parties. 
 The females had separate prayer meetings; but 
 they would attend both the party "out" seated 
 in the rear. When the party "in" would pray, 
 "0 Lord, we have sinned, and done evil in thy 
 sight," there would be a response behind, with pro- 
 voking emphasis, "True e-nough, Lord!" When 
 the prayer was, "Forgive us, O Lord, and enable 
 us 'to live soberly, righteously, and truthfully," the 
 response was, "Amen, and amen." And yet, to
 
 LEAVE NEW ORLEANS. 223 
 
 take the parties separately, they were all as sweet 
 as sugar. 
 
 Toward the Spring of the year, as I was coming 
 out of the meeting-house, brother Bascom took me 
 aside, and asked me if I had left any brothers in 
 New Orleans. 
 
 "Yes, three." 
 
 "Because," said he, "I saw, in a paper, to-day, 
 that a gentleman of your name I have forgotten 
 his first name fell lately in a duel." 
 
 This went like a dagger to my heart. I requested 
 him to get fuller information, and, hunting up my 
 sister, we passed on rapidly to our home for it 
 seemed to me that I would drop before we could 
 reach it. As soon as we entered the door, I in- 
 formed my sister of the awful tidings, and we were 
 plunged into grief inexpressible. The extreme an- 
 guish that possessed us is, even in this day, a mys- 
 tery to me. Brother Overstreet and his kind family 
 bent over us with all the sympathy of close rela- 
 tions. Brother Bascom took a fraternal interest in 
 our sufferings. 
 
 The tide of affliction was abundantly swelled by 
 hearing that my youngest brother, John, had fallen, 
 and that my oldest brother died immediately after, 
 with a natural disease. The practice of dueling 
 had kept me uneasy all the time I was in New 
 Orleans. Public opinion there, in that day, was 
 such that no man, unless he was a member of some 
 Church, could refuse a challenge or, if manifestly
 
 224 THE CROSS. 
 
 insulted, omit to give one without ruining all his 
 temporal prospects. On this account I often con- 
 versed with my brothers on this subject, and tried 
 to inspire them with a proper abhorrence of the 
 practice. But they contended that it was easy 
 enough for me to talk, as every body knew my 
 profession bound my hands. But hardly any official 
 or political man there had escaped being called into 
 the field. The case, as far as I could learn, was 
 this: It was my oldest brother who first became 
 involved in the affair. My youngest brother in- 
 sisted on taking his place, as he had left his family 
 in Virginia for a while; and he was, moreover, the 
 principal stay of our widowed mother and her fam- 
 ily. My oldest brother would not consent to this; 
 but John so managed it as to get in between him 
 and his antagonist, and fell. My brother Thomas 
 was called out into the same field, at the same 
 time, but the seconds brought about a reconcilia- 
 tion. This brother I had saved from a duel before 
 I left New Orleans. An officer of the army, up 
 the river, called on him one day to give an account 
 for some little observation that had appeared in the 
 paper. He talked so insolently that my brother 
 struck him; a scuffle ensued, and the hands in the 
 office put him out. The next thing was a challenge. 
 I asked my brother if he was going to accept it. 
 He said, " Certainly ; he is an officer, and I must 
 of necessity accept it right off, according to general 
 opinion." I told him I only requested him to do
 
 LEAVE NEW ORLEANS. 225 
 
 one thing, as I knew he would fight, and that was, 
 to return as an answer, that, as the gentleman was 
 an entire stranger, he would hold the matter in con- 
 sideration, in order to make some inquiry. It was 
 hard work to get him to consent to this. But I 
 urged that, although the youth was in military cos- 
 tume, he might nevertheless be in disgrace. He 
 took the course that was advised, and, before the 
 time had expired, he found that the fellow had 
 been cashiered, and driven from the camp so that 
 he was pronounced by all the "honorables" to be 
 unworthy of his notice. 
 
 Now our family in Orleans was broken up, and 
 when these sad tidings reached my mother, they 
 almost killed her. We concluded to return to old 
 Virginia in the first place; and we could only do 
 so on horseback. As we were about to start, I 
 was fearful my board would nearly strap me, as 
 they say in these times; but when I asked brother 
 Overstreet for the bill, he pleasantly answered, 
 "Not a cent. I never intended to charge you from 
 the beginning." And he pressed me to move my 
 mother's family out. When we thought of the love 
 and kindness of this family, we departed in tears. 
 When we arrived home, I concluded that, after all 
 that had passed, I never could reconcile it to my 
 feelings to live again in New Orleans. I sent my 
 resignation to Washington, sold one of my horses, 
 and departed on the other for the West, with an 
 intention to seek a living in some place where I
 
 226 THE CROSS. 
 
 might move my mother's family, and live at less 
 expense. In all subsequent years occasional doubts 
 would arise in my mind of having done the best, by 
 yielding so far to my feelings, as to abandon that 
 place Orleans. My temporal prospects were very 
 fair; fields of usefulness were opening before me. 
 I preached, visited the hospitals, carrying them the 
 Holy Bible, besides distributing it to all the ends 
 of the earth, prayed with those who were dying 
 with the yellow fever, and I enjoyed a Savior's love; 
 but now I see the hand of Providence in giving me 
 a timely removal from the great evil that was com- 
 ing before my hands were stained with the institu- 
 tion, or my tongue steeped in rebellion toward God 
 and man. Our white society there had increased to 
 about thirty members, and our colored class to about 
 forty. The Church there has extended greatly, and 
 if the members possess the spirit that moved their 
 predecessors, many of them are mourning over the 
 desolation of the land. There is scarcely any part 
 of our Church for which I have cherished a more 
 lively interest than the society in New Orleans. 
 
 "What crosses have we borne, what trials have 
 we passed," since the Crescent City faded away in 
 the dim distance! 
 
 Traveling westward, with a half-formed intention 
 of making for Louisville, I came to the pleasant- 
 looking village of Wythe. Here I preached, and 
 some of the citizens beset me to stop, and open a 
 school. They said they had not had a male school
 
 SCHOOL-TEACHING. 227 
 
 for some time, and the last master would sometimes 
 get drunk, go to sleep on a bench, and the children 
 would run rampant. I consented to stay for a while, 
 and got such a crowded school that I thought it 
 best to adopt, to some extent, the Lancasterian plan. 
 We would commence in the morning by hearing the 
 first class read; then, at the signal given, all the 
 inferior classes would rise up, and the boys of the 
 first would take their places as monitors. Standing 
 in the midst of the whole, I acquired great adroit- 
 ness in detecting the smallest blunder. When this 
 was over, the monitors would all take their seats "at 
 the writing-desk, where every thing was previously 
 prepared. Then I would commence with the lower 
 classes, and hear them all myself. By this time the 
 writing would be finished, and the boys would have 
 time to look over their grammars. After the gram- 
 mar exercises were over, at the signal given, all the 
 classes would be heard by the monitors. In the 
 afternoon, arithmetic would be attended to. In this 
 way the classes of young scholars would have six 
 lessons in" the day. No time, except play-time, was 
 unoccupied. The school moved on like a factory; and 
 the large scholars were highly elated by the idea of 
 taking a game at teaching, and being themselves 
 masters some. In writing my history, my teaching 
 enterprise must not be slighted so bear with me. 
 One little girl, the daughter of a notorious infidel, 
 had been almost frightened out of all growth by the 
 despotism of the school-discipline of that day. She
 
 228 THE CROSS. 
 
 could hardly spell in one syllable; and when she 
 would make a mistake she would tremble like a 
 criminal. I saw she had something to learn before 
 she could learn to read. I sat down by her and 
 talked kindly, told her she should be my girl, and 
 that I would never whip her; then took her on my 
 knee, whenever she said her lesson. At last she had 
 all confidence in me, discarded her fears, and. pro- 
 gressed astonishingly. She soon could read well. 
 
 Her father heard that my school was opened 
 every day with prayer, and he became exceedingly 
 angry. He came down one evening to vent his 
 wrath indeed to whip me. I was boarding at the 
 house of one of the merchants, an Irish gentleman. 
 He came into the dwelling-house, swearing that if 
 I did not quit this whining and praying in school 
 that he would thrash me and break up my estab- 
 lishment. I talked calmly with him; told him 
 it was one of the rules of my school. The par- 
 ents generally had no objection, and the children 
 now looked for it; and if the President sent his 
 child to my school I would not alter the rule to 
 please him; but if it was so disagreeable to him 
 he could withdraw his child, and he would be 
 charged nothing. Here he broke out afresh with 
 his curses, and swore he would not take her 
 away, for she had learned more in one quarter 
 than she had learned in other schools in twelve 
 months. I suggested that, perhaps, the reason was 
 God had helped me because I called daily on him
 
 SCHOOL-TEACHING. 229 
 
 for help. This made him furious. He would not 
 take her away, but he would come to the court- 
 house on Sabbath, drag me out of the stand, and 
 do my business for me. 
 
 By this time my Irish landlady got her nap up, 
 and, rising majestically from her seat, said, 
 
 "Mister , if you have no other business here 
 
 but to abuse the master, I will advertise you that 
 when the carpenter built this house, he left a hole 
 in it; and you may take that advantage, and walk 
 out." 
 
 On this he cursed at her, and reminded her that 
 they had bought the house from him. 
 
 "Yes, but we bought it with that hole in it, and 
 I tell you to walk out." 
 
 On this he looked sneeringly at her, and said, 
 
 "Yes, you are at their gatherings, too, and I ex- 
 pect it will not be long before you will be talking 
 about being ' born again.' " 
 
 She bridled herself up, and said, 
 
 "I thank you, sir, I have not put off this im- 
 portant business to this late day. I was baptized 
 into Christ when I was a baby in my mother's 
 arms, and was confirmed long before I saw the likes 
 of you." / 
 
 And she put at him in good earnest, and cleared 
 her castle. It is singular that he never interrupted 
 me again, but still continued to send his daughter 
 to school; and when I wound up my business, I 
 concluded not to send my bill, because I hated strife
 
 230 THE CROSS. 
 
 and debate. But some who knew him best, said 
 that would make him desperately mad; so I called 
 on him. He politely invited me in, and said, 
 
 "Mr. L., I am sorry to hear that you are going 
 to leave us. My child has improved amazingly 
 under you. And I am sorry also that I gave you 
 that rough talk; but your religion recommends for- 
 giveness, and I hope you will extend it to me. I 
 assure you I never paid a debt more cheerfully." 
 
 While teaching here, the circuit preachers invited 
 me to come out and help them hold a two days' 
 meeting. We preached all Saturday and Sunday. 
 A Presbyterian tavern-keeper invited the preachers 
 to close the meeting at night in his tavern. They 
 concluded, if I would exhort, they would close it 
 with a prayer meeting. While exhorting, the power 
 of the Lord seemed to come down; some shouted, 
 some cried for mercy, and a revival commenced and 
 ran through the neighborhood, especially among the 
 Presbyterian children. The tavern-keeper walked 
 about the house clapping his hands and praising 
 God, because he had condescended to bless his tav- 
 ern with the shout of heaven-born souls. But his 
 daughter, who had been a vain, fashionable girl, 
 was converted, and she threw off all her jewels and 
 finery. This so exasperated the old man that he 
 declared no Methodist preacher should ever enter 
 his house again, with the exception of the young 
 man from Wythe he was a gentleman. 
 
 The Presbyterians generally forbid their children
 
 SCHOOL -TEACHING. 
 
 to unite with our Church, and were very anxious 
 to receive them into their own; but the young 
 people said they would join no Church but the 
 Methodist, and this they would do as soon as they 
 were of age. I have understood since that some of 
 them did so, and others backslid, as might be ex- 
 pected. A young man professed to get religion 
 there, who claimed me as his spiritual father. He 
 was very zealous, and could pray well from the 
 onset. In after years he became a popular minister 
 in the South, and filled some important stations. 
 A few years more, we heard he had removed to the 
 extreme South, and had backslidden and become a 
 gambler. A few years more, and he turned up in 
 Congress still an orator. One of his opponents in 
 debate threw in his face that he had been a Meth- 
 odist preacher. He replied that in the days of his 
 youth and indiscretion he had taken that chute, 
 but it was irrelevant to throw it up now. When I 
 heard this I trembled. But on a subsequent occa- 
 sion, when an infidel member of Congress was de- 
 claiming against chaplains and Christianity, he 
 stood up in his place as if the latent embers of 
 grace were stirred within and gave him a scorch- 
 ing rebuke, and made a masterly defense of Chris- 
 tianity. Then I hoped. But where he is now, 
 whether in time or eternity, we know not. If in 
 time, may he be reclaimed from his wanderings, 
 and find mercy at the hand of the Lord! Some of 
 our old members did not believe in him at the
 
 232 THE CROSS. 
 
 start, because he prayed with his eyes open; but I 
 told them not to stumble at this, as it was our duty 
 both to watch and pray. 
 
 We had a camp meeting soon after this a very 
 singular one. As I was riding to it, a gentleman 
 overtook me, and asked where I was from. 
 "Wythe." He said they had heard strange news 
 from "Wythe, that the folks had permitted a Meth- 
 odist preacher to live among them. He then went 
 on to recount some of their wicked doings in former 
 years, and how a gang of them followed a Method- 
 ist preacher who came through the place, and forced 
 him to dance to the sound of a fiddle. On subse- 
 quent inquiry this was found to be true, and my 
 old infidel friend was at the head of the gang. 
 
 We had only two or three sermons on the camp- 
 ground, when there came on a rain which precluded 
 all public exercises ,to the close of the meeting. 
 There were only eight or nine tents. Happily, 
 some of them were very large and we betook our- 
 selves to singing and praying. The fashionable 
 people, who came out on Saturday, crowded into 
 the tents to save their finery, and a wonderful time 
 followed. While the exercises were going on, they 
 would drop like shot blackbirds, tear off their ruf- 
 fles and ornaments, and cry for mercy. I would 
 look on, and ask myself who told them to do this. 
 Nothing had been said about dress; and some of 
 them had never heard the Methodist preachers be- 
 fore. It was the Spirit of God writing on their
 
 CAMP MEETING. 233 
 
 truly-awakened hearts. It was a singular scene to 
 see converted young men standing up, their wet, 
 torn ruffles flapping in the wind, while with all 
 their power they exhorted their companions to flee 
 from the wrath to come. On Monday morning the 
 white members were completely exhausted. The 
 little colored camp was marched up. They rushed 
 into the battle like a reserved corps, and the very 
 heavens resounded with prayer, praise, and the 
 shouts of regenerated men and women. The gentle- 
 man who had just been elected as their representa- 
 tive was converted. A family was justified, all but 
 one son. He was roused up from the mourners' 
 bench to go home and bring the horses. He did 
 so harnessed them up; and, returning to the tent, 
 flung himself on his knees, and never rose till he 
 stood up to praise God for his redeeming grace. It 
 was said that more than one hundred were con- 
 verted on the ground. And how many more after, 
 who can tell? As we rode home, shouting, prayer, 
 and praise seemed to ascend from almost every 
 farm-house on both sides of the road. Taking into 
 consideration the number of people assembled, the 
 paucity of the means, the apparently-unfavorable 
 weather, and other circumstances, I hold it to be 
 the greatest camp meeting I ever attended and I 
 have been at many truly great. 
 
 20
 
 234 THE CROSS. 
 
 XVIII. 
 SETTLE IN XENIA-THE MINISTRY. 
 
 I NOW concluded to move farther west, having 
 Kentucky principally in view. I procured a small 
 wagon and two horses, and, with my mother and 
 three single sisters, took up my pilgrimage. For 
 lack of experience, we were nearly a month in 
 traveling a distance we ought to have made in two 
 weeks. After we had entered Kentucky we came 
 to a fork in the road, where we stopped and held a 
 council. I told them my feelings were all for Ken- 
 tucky; but it was a slave State, and, as we would 
 have to depend on our own resources, we might be 
 subject to occasional mortifications; whereas Ohio 
 was a free State, and although it might have some 
 disadvantages, yet I believed that, in the long run, 
 it would be more suitable to us. After considerable 
 deliberation, we took the direct road to Cincinnati. 
 Although this at the outset had not been contem- 
 plated, yet it was certainly the better course. We 
 finally settled in Xenia, and found there and in its 
 vicinity many old Virginians, and a few acquaint- 
 ances. Here I opened a school, and when it in- 
 creased considerably my mother took charge of the
 
 SETTLE IN XENIA. 235 
 
 female department. She was well qualified to 
 teach, especially in arithmetic. 
 
 While in Louisiana I trembled at the intelligence 
 of the people, and longed for "a lodge in some vast 
 wilderness," where my talents, slim as they were, 
 might be more needed; and especially where I 
 might not be buried by superior ministerial lights. 
 Vain hope ! About the first man I heard preach 
 was Dr. Taylor, who was an extra minister. He 
 was profoundly doctrinal and argumentative. He 
 had, however, a considerable drawback. He had 
 an incurable devotion to all the obsolete words of 
 our dictionary, and was inclined to verbosity. On 
 one occasion he changed appointments with a preacher 
 in an obscure region. When the regular preacher 
 came back, the people told him that they hoped 
 when he sent another man in his place, he would 
 send one who could preach English, not Latin. 
 After I had entered the traveling connection, I 
 came on a bitter cold day to a large meeting-house. 
 As the door opened, a blast struck me which almost 
 capsized me. Leaving the door open, and advanc- 
 ing, I saw a large brick platform, and on it a glow- 
 ing charcoal fire, surrounded by a large congrega- 
 tion. I stopped short, and as the people had never 
 seen me before, every eye was fixed upon me. 
 Stretching forth my hand toward the glowing pile, 
 "Brethren, that is precisely the way we used to 
 kill rats on board our ship. When we had got into 
 port and discharged our cargo, we filled an old pot
 
 236 THE CROSS. 
 
 with a charcoal fire, placed it on the keelson, bat- 
 tened down all the hatches for twenty -four hours, 
 and when we would open them, every rat in the 
 ship would be lying dead about the pot. Is it 
 possible that no preacher has ever told you of the 
 danger of sitting over such a fire?" 
 
 One brother said, "Uo preacher ever said any 
 thing about our fire excepting Dr. Taylor. He 
 stood over it once, and made a speech, but none of 
 us could understand it. I only remember two 
 words of it which he often repeated, 'hydrogen and 
 nitrogen;' but you speak plain, and say it will kill 
 rats, and we '11 put it away. Our women have 
 often fainted when we had large congregations, but 
 we never blamed the fire." 
 
 Nevertheless, Dr. Taylor was an instructive 
 preacher. The next I heard was John Strange, his 
 colleague. He was universally popular, even at 
 that time. When the quarterly meeting came on, 
 the elder, James B. Finley, preached in his most suc- 
 cessful style. I had to acknowledge that the whole 
 Virginia Conference at that time had no three men 
 that could match them. 
 
 . Brother Sale lived in the neighborhood. A more 
 pleasant and upright man I never knew. He was 
 my fast friend, and I enjoyed his counsel and ex- 
 ample for many years. He was remarkably con- 
 scientious. On one occasion, he related that before 
 he embraced religion he was in company with two 
 or three wild young men, who concluded to lash
 
 SETTLE IN XENIA. 237 
 
 something to the tail of an old horse, belonging to 
 a neighbor, to stir up a little fun. He did not ap- 
 prove of the sport, and tried to prevent it. The 
 horse ran off in a terrible fright, and was killed. 
 Although he had no hand in thus depriving a poor 
 man of his horse, yet he felt somewhat guilty in 
 keeping the secret. But after he obtained mercy 
 of the Lord, in the forgiveness of his sins, he re- 
 turned to the place, and having understood of the 
 owner the full value of his horse, acknowledged the 
 part he had in the transaction, and paid his full 
 share of the assessment. When he was traveling 
 out westward as a young preacher, he was under 
 the necessity of putting up at a tavern. Every 
 thing around him appeared so irreligious, that he 
 had no encouragement to speak of prayer it was 
 only a tavern. When the landlord lighted him to 
 bed, he asked him what was the object of his jour- 
 ney. He said in a tremulous voice, "I am going 
 out to preach the Gospel." The tavern-keeper fast- 
 ened his piercing eyes upon him, and said, "Young 
 man, you will not be of much force. The preach- 
 ers out here will hold family prayer if they are in 
 the very gates of hell." He said he never neg- 
 lected it again. There was considerable controversy 
 abroad when we moved to Ohio. Some of the 
 young preachers were riding along the road and 
 telling some of the smart and pungent turns they 
 had taken in this line; brother Sale turned in his 
 saddle and said, "Boys, I want you to take one
 
 238 THE CROSS. 
 
 idea along with you you can catch more bees with 
 honey than you can with vinegar." This word 
 spoken in season was of immense importance to 
 myself. 
 
 Dr. Joshua Martin, of Xenia, proposed to me to 
 study medicine; at the same time offering me his 
 office, books, and instructions gratuitously. This 
 offer I embraced, and spent all my leisure time in 
 reading medical works, according to his arrange- 
 ment. After I was employed to teach a Methodist 
 school in Lebanon, he still supplied me with books 
 and periodical instruction. While residing in Xenia, 
 Bishop M'Kendree came along and insisted on start- 
 ing a Sabbath school there. At that time there 
 had been no Sunday school, that I knew of, in 
 Southern Ohio, outside of Cincinnati. He selected 
 me for the -superintendent. I objected on the score 
 of my preaching almost every Sabbath. He said 
 this could be done in the afternoon; and even if I 
 did not preach so often, I might, in the long run, 
 do more good with the school. We started the 
 school; and a first-rate school it was. We had 
 about one hundred and eighty scholars; many of 
 the children coming from one to three miles around. 
 Out of that original school came five or six traveling 
 ministers, several local ministers and officials; and, 
 indeed, there were very few of those scholars that 
 did not become acceptable members of the Methodist 
 Episcopal Church. Now, I do not, reader, monopo- 
 lize the praise of this work; for we had pious and
 
 SETTLE IN XENIA. 239 
 
 efficient teachers; but it is meet to show that, in 
 entering on the great work, I did " in the morning 
 sow my seed," and "my labor is with my God," 
 and if he approved it, the "record is on high." 
 
 When I had advanced considerably in the study 
 of medicine, I became uneasy about what would be 
 my best course. The first inquiry was, can a man 
 be an efficient preacher, and at the same time attend 
 to the duties of a physician, allowing that he has 
 only a tolerable practice? The answer was, no. 
 Can he be a useful doctor, and attend to the whole 
 duty of a minister? No more than a man can 
 serve two masters. And the decision was that I 
 should prefer the most important call. Another 
 thing that lay heavy on my mind was this: in re- 
 moving from New Orleans I had, of necessity, to 
 forego many special privileges regular and stated 
 periods of devotion, reading, and meditation; this, 
 with continual moving, and mixing with young 
 company, considerably impaired my enjoyments in 
 religion. Indeed, although I have not set out, after 
 the example of Rousseau, to write my confessions, 
 which would benefit no one, yet I can not, on the 
 other hand, like a simple biographer, pass by my 
 sins altogether. I felt that I was going back con- 
 siderably. Sometimes I thought it was wrong for 
 me to profess to be a Christian at all; then I would 
 be filled with bitter contrition; then peace and com- 
 fort would return, and I would feel the Lord had 
 not cast me off. I felt that I dare not give up any
 
 240 THE CROSS. 
 
 of my duties praying, preaching, and meditating. 
 It seemed to me that my own safety would be in 
 letting go the world altogether, and giving myself 
 entirely up to the work of the ministry. I was 
 recommended to the Conference and received. As 
 far as the itinerancy is concerned, it has been with 
 me a standing cross for nearly forty years. It was 
 with great trepidation that I first mounted into the 
 saddle to take a circuit. I went to sea before I had 
 learned to ride. I took for my motto, 
 
 "Some trust in chariots made for war, 
 
 And some of horses make their boast; 
 My surest expectations are 
 In Thee, the Lord, the God of hosts!" 
 
 Time would fail me to tell of the many dangers 
 and frightful hair-breadth escapes through which I 
 passed the ground and lofty tumblings that befell 
 me. But the Lord was very gracious to me; for as 
 often as my honor was laid low in the dust or mud, 
 horse and all, I always rolled "right side up." 
 Again, my leaning was for a settled ministry. My 
 experience has taught me that the longer I preach 
 to a congregation the better I know how to serve 
 them. And I never enjoy myself better than when 
 I preach two new sermons every Sabbath. It may 
 be asked, then, why I did not join some religious 
 connection where a settled ministry was the order. 
 Such a proposal was made to me, in the morning of 
 my ministry, by an authorized agent. But, 
 
 First. I saw no Church that I considered so
 
 THE MINISTEY. 241 
 
 orthodox, in doctrine and practice, as the Methodist 
 Episcopal Church. 
 
 Secondly. I believe that the itinerancy whether 
 it suited me best or not was, as a general thing, 
 the best plan for the salvation of souls. 
 
 Thirdly. And all-sufficient; it was the plan laid 
 down by our Savior. -He sent them forth, two by 
 two, into all the world. 
 
 When we speak of the itinerancy, of course we 
 mean as it is laid in the Discipline, without guile 
 and without partiality. As it regards any devi- 
 ation it rests on broader shoulders. 
 
 I went forth believing I was called to the work. 
 As the call to the ministry is regarded by some as 
 somewhat mythical, I will express my views in re- 
 gard to this matter. 
 
 We believe that the man who is called of God to 
 preach his Word, has a deep, solemn, and abiding 
 impression resting on his soul, that it is his duty to 
 hold forth the Word of life to his fallen race that 
 it is an all-absorbing impression, strongly checking 
 all his natural aspirations after wealth, honor, 
 worldly settlement, as though he were by no means 
 his own, but constantly awaiting the disposition of 
 Almighty God. It may be asked here if a man 
 may not be deceived at this very point taking the 
 fervid workings of his own fancy for a Divine call. 
 Certainly men may be deceived. We have seen 
 some who, in our opinion, were deceived in' regard 
 to their having religion. But this impression is
 
 242 THE CROSS. 
 
 not the whole call. There is in connection a provi- 
 dential call. The God of grace is the God of provi- 
 dence. It would be unreasonable to suppose the 
 Lord would call a man by his grace, and forbid 
 him by his providence. If he has called him by his 
 Spirit, he will assuredly open his way. Some have 
 insisted they are divinely called, but when the 
 matter is investigated by a godly Church, that 
 Church kindly, but firmly, dissents. A pious 
 Church is a good judge. The ox knoweth his 
 owner, and the ass his master's crib, and true 
 Christians know who is instrumental in feeding 
 them with the bread of life, and building them up. 
 It is seldom that the Church is mistaken. They 
 might be for a season, but if the individual exer- 
 cises Christian charity and patience the Lord will 
 open his way, if he is called; but in too many 
 cases they fly off, and show by their subsequent 
 conduct that their cases are doubtful. Again, one 
 who believes he is called should examine closely his 
 motives. Particularly should he search his own 
 heart in regard to being moved by pecuniary con- 
 siderations. This inquest with some is not elabo- 
 rate, for in many cases it will be found that, as far 
 as money is concerned, the step will be a sacrifice. 
 But he should inquire whether he is moved by a 
 love of fame, also; for this would be as sinful a 
 motive as filthy lucre. And when he feels that he 
 is clear in all these things, and the ruling impres- 
 sion of his mind is, "For Zion's sake I will not rest,
 
 THE MINISTRY. 243 
 
 for Jerusalem's sake I will not hold my peace, till 
 her righteousness goes forth as brightness, and her 
 salvation as a lamp that burneth;" then, we think, 
 he has a comfortable evidence that he is called to 
 the work. It was by these rules that I judged my 
 own case. I had an abiding impression that it was 
 my duty to preach.
 
 244 THE CROSS. 
 
 XIX. 
 ITINERANT LIFE-COLUMBUS CIRCUIT. 
 
 1824. IN entering on this, my first circuit, I 
 had two especial crosses to face : 
 
 1. My colleague Charles Waddle was, without 
 exception, the most popular preacher in the Confer- 
 ence. I felt no envy, and never had any, in regard 
 to any colleague; but I was afraid that the congre- 
 gations were so accustomed to such extra preaching, 
 that my efforts might not be as serviceable as they 
 might be under other circumstances. I was soon 
 relieved of this fear by the urbanity and fraternal 
 attentions of the whole Church. I suppose there 
 never was a society of Methodists, in Ohio, more 
 experienced, more pious, more forbearing than the 
 Church of Columbus in that day. 
 
 2. The Legislature was much in my way. It was 
 indeed a venerable body, and would compare favor- 
 ably with any that has occupied the State-House 
 since. I regarded them at first as the collected 
 wisdom of the State. 
 
 But I soon learned that they were mostly men 
 of circumstances that intellectual worth was sel- 
 dom the qualification of popularity. Indeed, that
 
 ITINERANT LIFE. 245 
 
 year one of our counties had sent an idiot, by way 
 of sport, to represent them. At first I preached to 
 them, with fear and trembling; but before I was 
 done I preached at them, with much assurance. I 
 was very awkward in my circuit duties, of which I 
 might give one instance : After preaching at Colum- 
 bus, I asked some member if he could tell me where 
 my next appointment was, as I had no plan. He 
 said the Monday appointment was at Dublin; that 
 I must cross over to Franklinton, and any one 
 would put me in the road. "All right," I thought, 
 as I mounted my horse " a chief city in Ireland." 
 As soon as I crossed the river, I asked a man if he 
 could tell me the way to Belfast. 
 
 " Belfast ? No, sir. I know of no such town in 
 these regions." 
 
 "Why, it is not more than seven or eight miles 
 from this place." 
 
 " Then it must be some new town." 
 
 Then I inquired of another, and another, and so 
 on. Some said it was not in that county; some 
 said they did not believe there was such a place in 
 all the country. Then I took what seemed to be 
 the most probable road, thinking that the nearer I 
 approached the place the better the people would 
 know it. Having proceeded about eight miles, I 
 again inquired. One put me on one road, and one 
 on another; but nobody knew exactly where Belfast 
 was. It was all surmise. Thus I rode all day, 
 and got into a forest, where I expected night would
 
 246 THE CROSS. 
 
 overtake me. But about dusk I came to a cabin, 
 and I asked if I could stay all night. 
 
 "You have come to preach to us to-morrow." 
 
 "Is my appointment here, to-morrow?" 
 
 "It is, I suppose." 
 
 "Well, do tell me where Belfast is. Is it the 
 appointment for to-day?" 
 
 "No. If they have not altered the plan, you 
 should have preached at Dublin to-day." 
 
 "0 yes, Dublin! Dublin! that's it!" 
 
 I did not hear the last of this for twelve months. 
 I was now like a young bear my troubles just 
 beginning. I was weighed at the penitentiary, and 
 found that in two rounds I had gained thirteen 
 pounds. My mare also took advantage of the 
 change, and began to cover her bones, and to lay 
 aside her meekness, and sometimes get into awful 
 frights. We hardly know whether it would be 
 more proper to say we rode, or walked, our first 
 circuit. When she would commence a great fright, 
 in the self-same moment I would step on the 
 ground for I yet retained my sailor agility and 
 then it would take all my strength to hold her. I 
 would then take her by the bit, and walk a mile or 
 two, till she got calm. The brute got so used to 
 this that, when she intended to take a fright, she 
 would cock one ear and look back to see if I was 
 getting down. Sometimes I would not, but would 
 pat her and talk to her, and persuade her not to 
 scare just then. This was a source of much morti-
 
 ITINERANT LIFE. 247 
 
 fication to me, for all the awkwardness that was 
 ever recorded in horse-jockey lore was fastened on 
 me; and I had sometimes to hear grave ministers 
 recounting awful mishaps in my traveling that I 
 had never heard of before. For this reason I would 
 run great risks in the saddle when in company. 
 When about to start, one day, from town, in the 
 presence of several who, I knew, were watching me, 
 I thought I would cut something extra, so as to 
 reduce my slanderers, and I undertook to spring 
 from the ground into my saddle. That I might not 
 come short, I gathered up all the force necessary 
 yea, rather more for I landed on the other side of 
 my nag, to the great amusement of my brethren. 
 For about forty years I have been seeking for a 
 perfect horse, but have never found him. In that 
 time I have owned thirty-two all of them possess- 
 ing some good qualities and many bad ones. If one 
 did not scare, he would stumble, and occasionally 
 fall, at most inauspicious times and in most incon- 
 venient places; some would scare and fall, too, 
 simultaneously. As it regarded my support, I had 
 little or no forethought about it. This was not my 
 object. The school which I taught afforded me 
 almost four hundred dollars annually. My quarter- 
 age, the first year, was from eighty to ninety; but 
 it was the most beautiful money I had ever 
 received; it looked pure and holy the wages of 
 the Lord. 
 
 But although quarterage if the term is not
 
 248 THE CROSS. 
 
 obsolete never troubled me much on my own ac- 
 count, yet it troubled me greatly in connection 
 with others. I found scores of Methodists who 
 bore without murmuring the whole pecuniary 
 weight of their circuits, paying regularly the fare 
 of hundreds toward Mount Zion. I say toward. 
 Men who would indignantly forbid their neighbors 
 to pay their fare to Cincinnati, would quietly sub- 
 mit to their paying their expenses all the way to 
 heaven. Now, the difficulty with me was to have 
 any confidence in their profession. "But could you 
 not quietly pass them by?" No, I had to meet 
 them in the classes, and to listen to their thunder 
 in rooms they had not warmed any farther than 
 the animal heat of their own bodies extended, and 
 by lamps that they had never oiled, and to exhort 
 them with words which were without money and 
 without price they had a religion which cost them 
 nothing, and, as Dr. Clarke says, was good for 
 nothing. These observations do not apply particu- 
 larly to my first circuit. I only throw them in as 
 preliminary to the long conflict. The Columbians 
 did well in that generation. On the circuit my 
 saddle-bags were stuffed with socks, gloves, and 
 other necessaries, and all these were pure demon- 
 strations of friendship, inasmuch as I was pretty 
 well rigged from the beginning. 
 
 In that day we had no protracted meetings. The 
 term was not then coined even among the Presby- 
 terians, where it originated. We made, however, a
 
 ITINERANT LIFE. 249 
 
 steady draw on sinners through the year Winter 
 and Summer. Faith came by hearing, and hearing 
 by the preaching of the Word. Persons would get 
 impressed under our ministry, and having to preach 
 again in the afternoon or next day, we would leave; 
 but the local preachers and leaders would get up 
 neighborhood meetings, and the convicted would 
 find relief in the ordinary means of grace. When 
 the preacher would come round, he would take in 
 two or three, sometimes as many as five or ten at 
 the different appointments. These coming in grad- 
 ually and understandingly, and being consigned to 
 large classes, were cared for, and they generally 
 persevered. 
 
 Having now retired from charge, I feel it to be a 
 duty, which I can not neglect, to protest solemnly 
 against the practice into which we have fallen in 
 this day. Our people, generally, do not look to the 
 ordinary means which God has established in his 
 Word. It would be wonderful now for a soul to be 
 converted in a prayer meeting. Our faith and hope 
 stretch forward to the protracted meeting. The 
 people and sometimes the minister pray mightily 
 for God to meet them at the approaching big meet- 
 ing. Speak to sinners about seeking religion, and 
 they will say, "We have been thinking about it, 
 and we have concluded to try when that big meet- 
 ing comes off." Some will say, "But we take in 
 large numbers on such occasions." True, and aside 
 from the great drought and apathy which intervenes
 
 250 THE CROSS. 
 
 through the whole year, it might seem as well to 
 take them in at one sweep as to be receiving them 
 the whole year. But what becomes of them? In 
 most cases the majority of them are laid aside in 
 twelve months. Some have been converted by the 
 Gospel, but many have been pressed into the Church 
 by exciting circumstances, youthful sympathies, and 
 novel measures unknown in apostolic times. They 
 have not embraced the truth in the love of it. The 
 meeting is run to such an extreme, that when the 
 members fall back on their ordinary services, they 
 are cold, spiritless, and surfeited; and the young 
 members begin to feel the reaction too strong for 
 them. So the neighborhood is filled with people 
 who have once been in the Church, but not long 
 enough to form an attachment to it, and it is 
 doubly difficult to catch them again. 
 
 This is not all. It is destroying our ministers. 
 This extraordinary strain, long continued, on young 
 preachers produces bronchitis and diseases in their 
 vocal organs, so that we can find very few, even 
 among those on probation, who are not as shattered 
 trumpets. In a modern protracted meeting they 
 preach and exhort day and night, and in some 
 places they have to pray, sing, and shout, and do 
 all, till the members begin to think that the meet- 
 ing has been protracted to that point that it is 
 proper for them to dash in; custom has fixed that 
 point on the third or fourth week. The reader 
 must not think that we are croaking merely against
 
 ITINERANT LIFE. 251 
 
 others. "We old men have followed suit simply be- 
 cause we know that unless we get members accord- 
 ing to this programme, we can not get them at 
 all and it must be done in the Winter, too. The 
 old preachers have this advantage and we call on 
 the whole Church to remark it by audible attention 
 to the few who are still among us they have in 
 their youth, by constant preaching, acquired a vol- 
 ume of voice, enlarging with their growth, that can 
 ring, distinct and loud, through all the phases of 
 the most protracted meeting, as far as the natural 
 infirmities of age may allow. They are generally 
 sound in their throats. 
 
 On my first circuit, in addition to those we might 
 receive on our regular rounds, we received a con- 
 siderable number at two-days' meetings. Sometimes 
 we would continue these meetings at the expense 
 of our rest days, or by procuring ministerial help. 
 These we regarded as special revivals. We had 
 two such on Columbus circuit; one on the Scioto. 
 Here the New Lights had borne sway for some 
 time; and it did seem, then, as if they would take 
 the whole community into the river. My colleague 
 preached much against their errors; and I always 
 felt I was doing the Lord's own service when 
 preaching against Arianism. Here we had a great 
 work, and we had to make two societies along the 
 banks of the Scioto. The New Light preacher's 
 daughter came to our meetings, and joined the 
 Church. One of his people went to his house to
 
 252 THE CROSS. 
 
 bear the intelligence to him. He bowed his head 
 awhile, and lifted it \\p, and raised his eyes to 
 heaven, and said, "Thy will be done!" 
 
 We had another extraordinary meeting in a vil- 
 lage at one extremity of the circuit, where there 
 was a small Baptist Church. Seeing that the grace 
 of God was with us, they requested to unite with 
 us in the work. To this we cordially assented, and 
 we had a powerful revival. As the Sabbath drew 
 nigh we proposed a love-feast; and, as the Baptists 
 knew nothing about that means of grace, we invited 
 them all to come. When we opened the meeting 
 we explained its character how that the eating of 
 bread and drinking the water was only an outward 
 expression of our Christian friendship; but the ex- 
 change of our experience and Christian communion 
 was the spiritual banquet to which we were looking. 
 We then told the Baptists to do as they would see 
 us do, one not waiting for another. As soon as the 
 Methodists had started the speaking exercises, the 
 Baptist minister arose, and gave a clear and feeling 
 account of his experience his convictions, his con- 
 flict, his bright conversion, the time when and place 
 where he received the remission of sins. The power 
 of God seemed to fall upon the assembly like a sweep- 
 ing shower. Now a Methodist would rise now a 
 Baptist; and a stranger, coming in, could not have 
 known who was a Methodist or who was a Baptist, 
 for we all felt that there was one Lord, one faith, 
 one baptism the baptism of the Holy Ghost and
 
 ITINERANT LIFE. 253 
 
 of fire. When the meeting was about to close, we 
 hardly knew how to house our sheaves, for my col- 
 league was away at General Conference, and a local 
 preacher and myself had conducted the meeting. 
 However, with the consent of the Baptist minister, 
 we stated that it was always our custom, when we 
 closed a large meeting, to open the door of our 
 Church to see who were candidates for membership ; 
 but, as we had worked together, there might be 
 some who might wish to join us, and there might 
 be some whose leanings and associations might be 
 for the Baptist Church. We only wanted those 
 if any who thought they could serve God best in 
 the Methodist Church. If there were any who 
 thought they could get more good and do more 
 good in the Baptist Church, we hoped they would 
 not, through the impulse of the moment, join us 
 because they would afterward be dissatisfied. When 
 we opened the door, nearly the whole school rushed 
 into our net. The Churches then fell back to their 
 own work the Baptists crying out, "Water! 
 water!" and the Methodists, "Fire! fire!" and all 
 the young converts, "Glory! glory!" We had, 
 also, a very good work in Columbus; and it was a 
 reviving year to the membership. 
 
 There was a blacksmith in the city who was 
 much" given to intoxication. His story was: While 
 sitting in his shop, about twilight, his attention 
 was roused by an extraordinary light springing up 
 suddenly in his shop. He raised his eyes, and saw
 
 254 THE CROSS. 
 
 a brilliant personage standing before him, with a 
 look of anger, mingled with compassion. He up- 
 braided him with his past misconduct, but concluded 
 by telling him there was room in heaven for him if 
 he would reform. He was found stretched on the 
 floor. He was dreadfully alarmed, and for some 
 time was afraid to be alone. He went further, and 
 quit using spirits for a while; he went further, and 
 came once to our church but hid behind the door. 
 We did not believe that this man had any super- 
 natural visitant; but all the people in the place 
 could not persuade him otherwise and, as it 
 regarded him, it was the same as if it had been 
 real. We only refer to it as a remarkable illustra- 
 tion of Abraham's doctrine, "Neither would they 
 be persuaded if one should arise from the dead." 
 The same blacksmith had a very amiable daughter, 
 who attended our revival, and in hearing Moses 
 and the prophets, and the holy evangelists, was 
 "persuaded" and powerfully converted. She re- 
 turned home, threw her arms around her father's 
 neck, and told him what great things the Lord had 
 done for her. He wept, and commended her step, 
 and said he hoped she would be faithful, for there 
 was no character so hateful as a backslider. He 
 went out, resumed his dissipated habits, and pressed 
 on with renewed thirst the downward way to Vuin. 
 The close of the Conference year, and departure 
 of the minister to a new field of labor, presses hard 
 upon the feelings of the preacher. Nearly forty
 
 ITINERANT LIFE. 255 
 
 years of travel and wandering has not blunted my 
 sensibility of the parting pang. It is made endur- 
 able only by the solemn promise which God has 
 given, that we shall be gathered together again. 
 We have sometimes almost envied those who have 
 administered for a long lifetime to the same con- 
 gregation and its succession, and when they t die 
 leave behind a Church that has been baptized in 
 infancy by their own hand; but when we remember 
 how many Churches we have been allied to, and 
 look forward to the day when they shall be flying 
 home from the north and from the south, from the 
 east and from the west, to take their places in the 
 kingdom of God, and while we cherish the hope that 
 the acquaintances we have made on earth shall be 
 perpetuated through a blissful immortality, we say, 
 it is enough. The children of God, in this world, 
 are necessarily a scattered people in many re- 
 spects. 
 
 1. They are scattered by the distance of time. 
 Abel, that eminent servant of God, stands at a 
 great distance, in point of time, from the saints of 
 this generation. Still there is a gracious alliance 
 of fellowship binding him to the Church now mili- 
 tant. We realize how much we love him, when we 
 regard him in comparison with that wicked one 
 who slew him. 
 
 When we come down to the history of the apos- 
 tles, the distance diminishes, and we feel a more in- 
 timate union. Again, when we descend to those
 
 256 THE CROSS. 
 
 Christians who have just preceded us, the tide of 
 Christian sympathy swells delightfully, and we run 
 after them to the very banks of the river, and 
 stretch out our hands to catch their falling mantles, 
 while we exclaim, "The chariots of Israel, and the 
 horsemen thereof!" 
 
 - "So seemed the prophet, when to mount on high, 
 His master took the chariot of the sky; 
 The fiery pomp, ascending, left his view, 
 The prophet gazed, and wished to follow too." 
 
 But we are separated. We must abide the times. 
 
 2. The saints of God are separated or scattered 
 by geographical lines. Even those who are cotempo- 
 rary with us, are not all present. We hear of 
 them, we read of them, and of their trials, their 
 labors, their success, and sometimes we may corre- 
 spond with them; and, 0, how we long, in the bow- 
 els of Christian communion, to embrace them, to 
 converse with them, to weep with them, if need be ! 
 0, ye ministers and children of our God! may we 
 not flow together, and break bread, and drink wine 
 in our common Father's house? Hush, 0, my soul, 
 and be quiet! Not now. Alas, how seldom do the 
 children of God, in any one family, gather together ! 
 I look back to the days of childhood, and see 
 myself as a little white-headed boy a smiling item 
 in a wide and joyful household. I comprehended 
 that Death would come, sometimes, like a sparrow 
 lighting on an ant-hill; but I thought his visits 
 might be far between, and that the survivors would
 
 ITINERANT LIFE. 257 
 
 close up the chasms from time to time, and that 
 even when the last fell, one social graveyard would 
 hold the band. But, years gone by, "that once fair 
 spreading family is dissolved;" the majority have 
 crossed the flood, and no two lie beneath the same 
 green sod. Never more shall we be gathered to- 
 gether in this wayward world. 
 
 3. The saints of God are sometimes scattered here 
 by Church polity. We do not all subscribe to the 
 same ecclesiastical government, to the same forms; 
 but this is nothing, provided we are not cursed 
 "with a want of love." There is variety in the -in- 
 ner as well as in the outer man. Still this separates. 
 It is a separation of convenience. Indeed, conven- 
 ience sometimes calls for the separation of members 
 of the same denomination. Can all the Methodists, 
 in a large city, meet in one house? Can all the 
 Presbyterians gather themselves together under one 
 pastor? Not now, my beloved. But of all the 
 saints of God, who sacrifice on earth, none are more 
 separated than the Bethel saints the true saints of 
 God, who are scattered abroad over the wide seas, 
 and lakes, and rivers, as well as many who are laid 
 up in dry dock, and others who are water-logged all 
 along the coast of life, scattered and peeled, and as 
 Sterne would say, ""and that to the quick." 
 
 Some of these, in their short stay on land, have 
 made their confession to Almighty God, meekly pre- 
 senting a crucified Savior, as their only sacrifice, 
 
 their only argument, their only lamb. God has 
 
 22
 
 258 THE CEOSS. 
 
 heard in heaven, answered on earth, and, as father 
 Taylor has said, "before the tears of penitence have 
 dried on their cheeks, they have weighed anchor, 
 and are again facing the chilling north-wester." 
 By and by, like a bird of passage, alighting, they 
 drop into port, hie away to the Bethel, have a song 
 and a prayer, with shipmates dear, break bread and 
 drink wine, with a floating brotherhood, shake 
 hands, and shout and sing, 
 
 " Farewell, dear friends, time rolls along, 
 We have no home, no stay with you; 
 We hoist our sails, and travel on, 
 Till we a fairer world do view." 
 
 What would the Christian sailors be, in this tem- 
 pestuous world, but as feathers driven to and fro, 
 were it not for the hope, 
 
 " The blissful hope ! 
 The hope by Jesus given; 
 The hope, when days and years are passed, 
 We all shall meet in heaven?" 
 
 But there is a day of gathering coming. We are 
 taught that a period is coming, when the God of all 
 spirits shall arise out of his holy place, and call 
 upon the heavens above, and the earth below, and 
 on all his mighty angels, saying, "Gather together 
 my saints, those who have made a covenant with 
 me, by sacrifice!" Alleluiah! At that sound all 
 the stays and stanchions, and props, and shores of 
 time will give way, the ages of earth will sink 
 into the bright eternal now, and martyred Abel
 
 ITINERANT LIFE. 259 
 
 will embrace the last elect of Adam's ruined 
 family. 
 
 " Abraham and Isaac, there, 
 And Jacob shall receive, 
 The followers of their faith and prayer, 
 Who now in bodies live." 
 
 At that sound, the earth with all its wearisome 
 miles, and deep seas, and rivers, and mighty mount- 
 ains, will shrivel as a parchment-scroll, and all the 
 saints of the Most High will come flocking home 
 from the north and the south, and -the east and 
 the west, and, 0, what a gathering of the waters! 
 What multitudes will flow together into the ever- 
 lasting kingdom of God's dear Son ! At that sound, 
 Church polity will be no more there will be one 
 fold, one shepherd, one temple; "for the Lord God 
 Almighty and the Lamb are the temple" of the New 
 Jerusalem, and the will of God will be the will of his 
 people, from thenceforth, and forever more. Come, 
 shipmate, will you set sail for this gathering ? Then 
 bring your sacrifice. Bring one that God will 
 accept. Bring the Lamb, slain, in the Divine Mind, 
 from the foundation of the world. Bring Christ, 
 for him hath God the Father sealed. And he has 
 said, "This is my beloved son, in whom / am well 
 pleased." Now present your offering. "Here, Lord, 
 am I, a poor, wretched sinner, lost, undone; but 
 here is my sacrifice, my ransom, my only plea. I 
 have sinned 0, how grievously! but Christ has 
 died, the just for the unjust, to bring us to God."
 
 260 THE CROSS. 
 
 Pray on, wrestle on, believe on, penitent soul, and 
 God will enter into an everlasting covenant with 
 you, for life and salvation, for time and for eternity. 
 
 Having passed the morning of my life on the 
 seas it is not strange that the habitudes of the sail- 
 or followed me into the ministry. This gave rise 
 to many questions, and I could not, without rude- 
 ness, avoid satisfying the social firesides by relating 
 some things which had fallen under my observation 
 in my ramblings on the sea. They seemed to be so 
 deeply interested in every thing of a nautical na- 
 ture, that I conceived the idea of explaining several 
 passages in the Bible where marine figures are very 
 happily used; and I often illustrated them by what 
 I had seen and experienced on land and flood. I 
 soon discovered that this kind of preaching was 
 effective; but it was not long before I found it was 
 peculiarly so under certain circumstances. When 
 the devotional feeling of the congregations had 
 taken a spring tide, and the soul of the preacher 
 in unison, then have we received extraordinary 
 power, and the revivals have been mightily ad- 
 vanced. We had the most satisfactory evidence of 
 the utility of this course, of which we may give 
 illustrations hereafter. 
 
 The use of technical language in discoursing on 
 religious and solemn subjects, by no means implies 
 an absence of veneration or want of piety. A pre- 
 siding elder, who is now in heaven we trust, once 
 told us he would like to hear us preach a sea-ser-
 
 ITINEKANT LIFE. 261 
 
 mon at any other time but on the Sabbath. This 
 we received, but did not resent, as an insult, be- 
 cause it implied that we would dare speak, as a min- 
 ister of God, on a week-day, what would be unsuit- 
 able to the Sabbath. The revelations of God are 
 clothed in language suited to the common profes- 
 sions in life. It is true that nautical phrases might 
 appear singular, yea, ridiculous to a novice, but to 
 the sailor they are natural, indeed oftentimes un- 
 avoidable. We felt a religious swell in our soul, a 
 few weeks since, when a gentleman from the East 
 was telling us of the death of a pious sailor. 
 
 A religious shipmate, who was solicitous of his 
 welfare, approached his berth and said, "It seems, 
 messmate, that your glass is well-nigh out; we 
 would like to know your prospects how do you 
 head?" 
 
 "0, all is well I see land just ahead." 
 Some hours after, when his eyes were almost set 
 in death, the question was repeated, when, with a 
 smile that revealed more than mortal tongue could 
 utter, he whispered, "Glory be to God! I am just 
 doubling the cape! Alleluiah!" Was there any 
 thing irreverent in this? No; it was the spontane- 
 ous and, therefore, sincere language of a sanctified 
 seaman. And if our vocabulary should extend into 
 eternity, we will doubtless hear again of the "stead- 
 fast anchor," the "blissful haven," the "sailor's 
 home," in a world of light and glory, "with God 
 eternally shut in."
 
 262 THE CROSS. 
 
 Some people think it is all right to preach on the 
 parable of the sower, and to illustrate the sermon 
 with all the technical phrases of a farmer, or to 
 preach on the Christian temple, all "fitly framed 
 together," using the square, line, and plummet, as 
 a skillful carpenter, or on the "balm of Gilead," 
 exhausting all the pharmacology of materia medica, 
 but it is awful to come down into the ship, and 
 "sit in the sea," and preach to those on the land, 
 as our Savior unquestionably did. 
 
 We are not among the number of those who con- 
 tend that sincerity will save a man. God has his 
 ordained plan of salvation. But we are willing to 
 admit that sincerity is a very necessary ingredient 
 in that peculiar frame of mind which prepares the 
 sinner to receive with meekness the ingrafted Word 
 that is able to save. 
 
 It was sincerity that nerved the arm of Saul of 
 Tarsus, when he was laying waste the Church of 
 Christ, but it was a sincerity powerless to save. 
 
 A gentleman went on board a ship to invite the 
 crew to a temperance lecture, which was to be de- 
 livered in the evening. The men with one accord 
 began to make excuses. At last they agreed if one 
 of the crew, pointing him out to the gentleman, 
 would go, they all would. This sailor was the 
 bully of the sl^ip, the ringleader in all mischief, and 
 they had no idea that he could be towed into a 
 temperance meeting. He was kindly approached, 
 and by one of those eccentric whims often found in
 
 ITINERANT LIFE. 263 
 
 man, lie declared solemnly that he would be on 
 hand. In the evening the crew refused to go, but 
 steady to his purpose he went alone. It happened 
 that a pious lady presented him a New Testament, 
 which he thankfully received. When he returned 
 on board his shipmates asked him what he had got 
 by going to the temperance meeting. 
 
 "I got that," said he, holding up his book. 
 
 "And what's that?" asked some of the crew. 
 
 "Why, it's the New Testament." 
 
 "It's all a pack of lies," said one. 
 
 "Avast heaving, and let me read a bit." 
 
 He then solemnly read a very impressive portion 
 of the book, and when he had finished, he flashed 
 his eyes around and said, 
 
 " Do ye see, if any man now says that 's ' a pack 
 of lies/ I 'm bound to thrash him." 
 
 As many as three, who were ambitious of a fuss, 
 at once exclaimed, "It's all lies." Whereupon he 
 unbuttoned his collar, and laid the whole triumvir- 
 ate on their beam ends, and suffered them not to 
 rise till they acknowledged that what they had 
 heard was truth, and nothing but the truth. 
 
 Believing himself that his book was the truth of 
 God, he continued to read it, and it was not long 
 before this violent defender of the Word of God was 
 found peaceably sitting at the feet of Jesus, and 
 clothed, and in his right mind. He was sincere in 
 fighting for the truth, but God had mercy upon 
 him, for he did it ignorantly in unbelief.
 
 264 THE CROSS. 
 
 XX. 
 
 FIRST CONFERENCE-BRUSH CREEK 
 CIRCUIT. 
 
 ZANESVILLE was the first Conference I attended 
 after my reception. In attending the camp meet- 
 ing, I was invited by the preacher in charge to 
 preach the night before the Conference met. I 
 consented, in my simplicity, not knowing the 
 preachers would come in till the morning of the 
 Conference. I now began to consider what I should 
 preach about. There was one text that I had used 
 just before I left my circuit somewhere in the 
 woods and it seemed to be unusually successful. 
 That was fixed upon. When we got into the meet- 
 ing-house we found it full, and about one-third were 
 preachers. The bishops were in the altar, and a 
 cold shiver ran over me. This was somewhat 
 allayed by my good friend, James B. Finley, taking 
 his seat in the pulpit to follow me. My text was, 
 "Therefore he said unto his servants, See, Joab's 
 field is near mine, and he hath barley there; go 
 and set it on fire. And Absalom's servants set the 
 field on fire." In the first place, we set forth the 
 narrative, paying a strong compliment to Joab, and
 
 FIEST CONFERENCE. 265 
 
 somewhat disapproving David's constant prejudice 
 against a servant so brave, so devoted. Then we 
 showed that people in modern times cultivated 
 opinions and doxies with as much care and indus- 
 try as Joab did his barley-field to instance: 
 
 1. The barley-field of Arianism. But God in 
 great mercy sent his servants to set that notion on 
 fire. And then how we did it. Then they would 
 come to God to inquire. 
 
 2. The great barley-field of Calvinism. It was 
 our duty to set that on fire. We here stated how 
 we had heard some, in our class meetings and love- 
 feasts, tell how they were once devoted to this ism, 
 and how the preachers set all their bigotry on fire, 
 and drove them to God. 
 
 3. The barley-field of Universalism. This we set 
 on fire; and, in connection with it, the field of infi- 
 delity. 
 
 4. Idolatrous barley-fields. Here we showed how 
 parents would sometimes love their children with 
 undue affection, and how God would send his angels 
 to take them away; how merchants would become 
 too much engrossed in commerce, and the Lord 
 would set their ships on fire, or sink them; how 
 strongly sinners were wedded to their sins; but in 
 all these cases God not in wrath, but in mercy 
 sent his servants to set their fields on fire, as a 
 means of their seeing the reconciled face of their 
 father, as Absalom did. We had hardly got half- 
 way through, when we felt the pulpit waving and 
 
 23
 
 266 THE CEOSS. 
 
 shaking as if we had been at the royal-masthead, 
 and, casting a glance behind, saw brother Finley 
 with his head down between his knees, and his 
 sides rising and falling like a blacksmith's bellows. 
 This damped my ardor a little; but I made out my 
 points. Still there were too many Joabs there of 
 different denominations, and too many of Absalom's 
 servants too heavy a press of black cloth. So I 
 sat down considerably mortified, and determined to 
 hang up that text, with all its appurtenances, like 
 a ham of venison to dry. When meeting was over, 
 brother Finley said, "Brother L., you have been 
 six months making that sermon." But I assured 
 him I had never preached on the text but a week 
 before. We record this as an error, hoping all 
 young preachers may take warning, and not under- 
 take singular texts, or hastily believe that they 
 were originally intended to apply to things spirit- 
 ual. Were I a bishop, I would embrace this advice 
 in every charge: "Let your text be as plain as, 
 'Eepent ye, for the kingdom of heaven is at 
 hand.'" 
 
 In that Conference I saw a man who seemed to 
 be a pillar, and who delivered several speeches. I 
 asked brother Sale who he was. He told me, and 
 said, 
 
 "He is one of our great men." 
 "Yes," said I, "but he is not religious." 
 "0, brother L., you must not talk so. What 
 evidence have you got that he is not religious?"
 
 FIRST CONFERENCE. 267 
 
 "None; only I feel that he is not sincere." 
 Here brother Sale, with pleasant smiles, gave me 
 a lecture, showing that preachers would often be 
 obliged to deal with men according to their pro- 
 fession in the Church, although their own minds 
 are not clear in their characters. Still the observ- 
 ation seemed to strike him, coming as it did from 
 one who was an entire stranger to the man; and I 
 believe he thought I had not come far short of 
 striking the nail on the head. Before two years 
 had passed, the subject of our conversation sud- 
 denly turned his back on religion, and gave ample 
 evidence of previous unsoundness. 
 
 While speaking on the subject of Conference I 
 will say, that many at this time think that the 
 young men take too much on themselves in debate. 
 This is a consequential reaction; about the time 
 my class, and, indeed, several preceding classes 
 came on the roll, the Conference was oppressed by 
 a strong seniority. Although these classes embrace 
 some of our strong preachers, yet there is not to be 
 found a Conference-speaker among them. There 
 were a number of old men in the Conference pious 
 and wise, and very able to do the business of the 
 body. When a young man as they would call 
 him, though stiffly bearded would rise up to speak, 
 some of them would roll something in his way 
 some parliamentary omission or something else. I 
 remember one saying, "Mr. President, I think it 
 becomes young men modestly to refrain from speak-
 
 268 THE CROSS. 
 
 ing on such an important subject." The preachers 
 would talk a great deal about this in the lobby. 
 One would say, "Brethren, who will know how to 
 do Conference business when our elder brethren are 
 removed? We are not permitted to learn." An- 
 other would say, "Well, they will go to heaven 
 soon, and leave you the field." This last one, 
 though a preacher, was not a prophet; for they 
 lived on till the boys became gray-headed, and 
 had by reverential silence lost the animus of con- 
 troversy. Then the later classes Young Amer- 
 ica took the floor, and some of us are glad they 
 did; because they tolerate old folks rather more 
 than old folks tolerated them. So, all can have 
 their "say." He who is now the lion of the Cin- 
 cinnati Conference floor, had -many a hard tack to 
 get the weather-gage of seniority, and he could not 
 have done it unless the Lord had laid his keel and 
 head of adamant. Our English brethren try hard 
 to guard their seniority to the present day; but, 
 now and then, an adventurous cutter runs the 
 blockade. We believe that a Conference is a place 
 where "every person may speak freely whatever is 
 in his heart." If this is heresy let us be tried by 
 the Discipline. 
 
 Some might say, "Well, the young men wanted 
 to make showy speeches, and so become popular." 
 This was not always the case. We sometimes saw 
 the very gist of the question the mystery hidden 
 from the beginning of the argument in the heat of
 
 BRUSH CHEEK. 269 
 
 debate, and could have placed it in lucid position, 
 but our "lot forbade." It would have required an 
 effort beyond the power of modest clay, even to get 
 the floor; an effort that would have knocked all the 
 wind out of our sails. 
 
 One thing more in regard to Conferences, and 
 that is the practice of making the question of ap- 
 pointments the last question, contrary to the Disci- 
 pline; or, in other words, making it the question 
 after Conference has been closed with singing and 
 prayer, and leaving some ministers ignorant of 
 their destination till read out publicly. A minister 
 who can bear this without extreme laceration of 
 feeling is unworthy to bear the vessels of the Lord. 
 It is also a very impolitic course. An appointment 
 which under some circumstances, might be almost 
 ruinous to one, might, under other circumstances, 
 be very acceptable to another. 
 
 BRUSH CREEK. 
 
 1825. The next circuit to which I was appointed 
 was Brush Creek. My colleague was William Sim- 
 mons. We were both young men, and had a very 
 agreeable year. This circuit, in some of its appoint- 
 ments, was considerably tainted with witchcraft and 
 conjuration. In working on the camp-ground, I 
 was telling a local preacher of some standing how 
 I had just lost a horse. He expressed much regret 
 that he had not heard of the hurt of the animal in 
 time, as he could have most certainly saved his life.
 
 270 THE CROSS. 
 
 He spoke so confidently that it struck me that the 
 receipt might serve me on some future emergency. 
 But I was astonished when he unfolded the course 
 of conjuration through which he would have cured 
 my horse. When he had got through I laughed. 
 This horrified him, and he denounced me on the 
 spot as an infidel. We had a very interesting trial 
 founded on witchcraft at one point of the circuit. 
 There was a very amiable widow and her daughters 
 living in the neighborhood, who were reported as 
 witches by a member of the Church. It was some 
 time before the slander reached their ears. They 
 had shown many acts of kindness toward the afflict- 
 ed member who had for a long time suspected them. 
 As he was poor and not able to work much, the 
 widow carried to. his family a large package of 
 sugar. She had hardly got out of the gate before 
 he threw the sugar on the fire, and observed to 
 some of the neighbors present, that the witch could 
 not come over him in that way. When the widow 
 heard the report she was greatly afflicted, and was 
 advised by her friends to bring the slanderer before 
 the Church. At the trial there was abundant tes- 
 timony that the slander had been widely spread 
 through the country. When the defendant under- 
 took to prove the malpractices of the lady, it 
 became a question with the committee whether 
 such an attempt might be suffered in such an age 
 of light; but one of the committee, who was a little 
 tainted with the belief of witchcraft himself, insisted
 
 BRUSH CKEEK. 271 
 
 on hearing the defense. The most of the testimony 
 was what we call "hearsay" Still the preacher, 
 like a good fisherman, slacked off the line for a 
 season, and the auditors were astounded at the 
 romance. A German doctor, somewhere in the 
 woods, had averred that the witch had several 
 times dragged him from his bed, at midnight, and 
 had sent him up among the rocky branches of the 
 hills and dales, in search of hens' nests. Another 
 had said, not having heard his cow-bell in the even- 
 ing, he had walked over all the forest seeking her; 
 but when he got back in sight of his house, there 
 was the cow, and the said woman was on her back, 
 holding the clapper of the bell. The defense was 
 going on for quantity, when the member of the com- 
 mittee, for whose sake it was allowed, looked at his 
 peers, and said, "Must we sit here listening to such 
 abominable stuff? I 'm satisfied." 
 
 He was expelled. When I came round to my 
 appointment the expelled man took me to one side, 
 and said, 
 
 "I am now put out 'of the Church, and do not 
 intend to make any fuss; but I will ask one little 
 favor which you can easily grant, that is, let that 
 sister, that has prosecuted me, come and lay her 
 hand upon my head before the congregation, and 
 say, 'God bless you.'" 
 
 "No, sir." 
 
 "Then I hope before twelve months have rolled 
 round, you yourself will become bewitched."
 
 272 THE CROSS. , 
 
 Whether his hope ever reached its fruition, I leave 
 the readers to judge. It would, however, be doing 
 nothing more than justice to them to say that, before 
 the twelve months were out, I got married to a pious 
 young lady, that I considered very bewitching, and 
 she has been my mate for many years over life's 
 rough sea, and has endured as much in the itiner- 
 ancy as any other woman. This same witchcraft, 
 under the dress of "spirit-rappings," has molested 
 some of our charges in later years. 
 
 The Minutes give us this year an increase of 
 ninety-five members. This does not seem to fill my 
 recollection of things; but my colleague held the 
 reins of discipline with "a. mild but firm hand." In 
 those days members could not stay in two or three 
 years, and not attend class, unless prevented by in- 
 firmities, or wicked parents or husbands. 
 
 I learned a good deal under brother Simmons, in 
 regard to Western Methodism and administration; and 
 if he learned any good from me, he is welcome to it. 
 
 I lacked, especially, one thing, the talent of sing- 
 ing. At first I thought I would at any moment 
 dismount, and give up my horse, saddle, and bridle, 
 for the ability to sing. Then again I have thought 
 I was so fond of music, that, if the Lord had made 
 me a singer, I would have broken down long ago. 
 I can join, in some sort, with the congregation; but 
 can lead in only one tune. If you ask, reader, what 
 tune is that, you are too hard for me. I put it 
 forth in emergencies.
 
 SCIOTO. 273 
 
 In one obscure appointment, on a new circuit, I 
 found no one to start the tune. I invited the 
 brethren, but no response. I turned an imploring 
 look to the sisters; one gave a woe-begone shake of 
 the head, as much as to say, vain hope! I fell on 
 my own resource, and the congregation joined in. 
 After the meeting was over, a smiling sister came 
 forward and said, "Brother, I must shake hands 
 with you. Thank God ! the Ohio Conference has 
 sent us a preacher at last who can sing!" I sighed 
 and thought, "Alas, siater, you know not how 
 slender my capital is-." 
 
 vioH . wi J 
 
 SCIOTO. 
 
 1826. I rode this circuit in connection with 
 brother Absalom Fox; Russel Bigelow presiding 
 elder. We had a good year, and a fine revival 
 about the Forge. Several young married people 
 were converted, and came to their leader to inquire 
 about baptism. This struck him with conviction on 
 that subject. He had been about thirty years in 
 the Church, and some years class-leader, was con- 
 vinced that he ought to be baptized, but had all 
 that time been studying about the mode. The con- 
 verts wished to be immersed. We gave out an ap- 
 pointment to baptize them. When the hour arrived, 
 no house could hold the multitude. I preached on 
 the subject, with all the candidates seated before 
 me. The view held out was the difference between 
 baptism and the different modes by which it was
 
 274 THE CROSS. 
 
 exhibited; that the mode was not baptism; it 
 was a sacrament not more holy than the Lord's 
 Supper. This was administered by the Churches in 
 different modes; but the Churches did not unship 
 each other on this account, or think that a mode 
 could vitiate the ordinance. Therefore, we as min- 
 isters were willing to perform the service in that 
 mode which would be most agreeable to the recip- 
 ients. Still, if they could patiently bear, I would 
 give my own understanding of the subject. Among 
 other good things which had been mentioned, it was 
 a sign or representation of that all-essential baptism 
 of the Holy Ghost. How was this performed? 
 The Scriptures most definitely declare by affusion. 
 The grace of God is represented as coming down as 
 the early and the latter rain, like dew on the mown 
 grass. On the day of Pentecost, all that was visible 
 in that baptism were cloven tongues of fire, falling 
 on the heads of the disciples. All that was audible 
 was a sound from heaven, like the rushing of a 
 mighty wind. Now, when the Lord commissioned 
 the apostles to put the sign of this baptism on their 
 converts, whether is it the most reasonable to sup- 
 pose that they represented it, as they had expe- 
 rienced it as coming down from heaven, and falling 
 upon their heads, or that in exhibiting it they 
 reversed the whole order of things, and immersed 
 the subjects beneath the water? With many other 
 words did we reason on this subject; but finally ob- 
 served we had fully prepared for every mode; that
 
 SCIOTO. 
 
 DO mere mode could destroy the validity of the con- 
 secration. Baptism was the sincere dedication of 
 the soul to God with water. The matter was purely 
 between them and their God; and if the Lord saw 
 they were sincere he would accept them. 
 
 I then came down, and asked each candidate sep- 
 arately, and in a whisper, What mode? To my 
 astonishment, every one but the leader said he or 
 she, as the case was would be fully satisfied with 
 affusion at the altar. We had a good time, and 
 this discharge of duty gave a fresh impulse to the 
 work. Some, though, were almost, not quite, dis- 
 appointed; for some people, who seldom go to meet- 
 ing in their own neighborhood, will walk five miles 
 to see a man or woman put under the water. I 
 said not quite. The leader rose up, and said he had 
 long studied this matter, and read the Bible, and 
 he had found that it would carry him into the water, 
 but no further. 
 
 "Philip," said he, "went down with the eunuch 
 into the water; but .that was not baptism, for it is 
 said afterward, 'and he baptized him;' after this 
 they came up ' out of the water,' but this was no 
 part of baptism. The baptism was between their 
 going into the water and their coming out of the 
 water. So I wish the preacher to go down with 
 me, knee-deep then I will kneel down, and he will 
 pour* the water upon my head, and then we '11 come 
 up out of the water." The whole congregation 
 marched down to see this new kind of baptism.
 
 276 THE CEOSS. 
 
 So I got my feet wet any how. But all the while 
 I did not believe that Philip and the eunuch did 
 more than to go to a certain water perhaps a 
 spring. Even the Baptists understand the word 
 "into" as covering no more in many places in the 
 Bible where it is not in connection with baptism 
 then it means "under" 
 
 We had a fine camp meeting toward the close of 
 the year. As it was in the neighborhood of a Pres- 
 byterian charge, and as the minister had to be ab- 
 sent that Sabbath, he recommended his congregation 
 to attend the camp meeting. Many of them came. 
 In those days, we thought we were doing a small 
 business on Sunday morning if we did not have two 
 or three sermons, one after another. Best to the 
 ashes of that habit! After the eight-o'clock and 
 noon services, the Presbyterians retired to a con- 
 venient spot to take their lunch, and a Methodist 
 heard something like the following dialogue: 
 
 A. Well, brethren, what do you think of the ser- 
 mons? 
 
 B. Why, my opinion is they were truly orthodox ; 
 but I have been trying to reconcile it with what I 
 have been taught from childhood, and that is, that 
 the Methodists preached salvation by works. Have 
 you ever heard the doctrines of grace set forth in a 
 clearer light? 
 
 C. Well, they did at first preach dead wSrks; 
 but their theology is improving. In fact, they have 
 altered their Discipline. I have been informed that
 
 SCIOTO. 277 
 
 their present Discipline is widely different from the 
 original. 
 
 D. There can be no objection to the -doctrine we 
 have heard this day; and their preaching talents, 
 on an average, are superior to those of our minis- 
 ters. We have a great man here and there, but 
 where will you find so many at one meeting? 
 
 E. "Well, the reason is, we are so stingy about 
 theological schools. It is evident to every observ- 
 ing man that all these men have been highly edu- 
 cated. We will have to be doing in the way of 
 education, or we will certainly be left behind. 
 
 This year I was married to Miss Mary Mitchell, 
 daughter of George and Ann Mitchell. My wife's 
 father was a local minister in the Methodist 
 Church. Mary is so well known, and so well be- 
 loved by all the sisterhood, where our lot has been 
 cast, that it would be out of place for me to get up 
 any eulogy. It will not soon be forgotten with 
 what zeal and promptness she gave in her testi- 
 mony in our love-feasts and classes, and with what 
 fervor and modesty she labored and prayed about 
 the mourners' bench. Her father's house was a 
 preaching-place in Kentucky for many years. Un- 
 der William Holman and Samuel West a great revi- 
 val broke out in that house, and all the family that 
 had come to years of understanding were converted, 
 with about one hundred of the neighbors. Mary 
 claims that brother West was the instrumentality 
 of her conversion. This was when she was fifteen
 
 278 THE CROSS. 
 
 years of age. The day that this revival broke out, 
 Holman said he prayed, at every step his horse 
 took, all the way to his appointment and prayed 
 especially for the family. 
 
 Brother Fox, my colleague, was an old acquaint- 
 ance. When I was teaching school in Lebanon he 
 was working on his bench. He had been authorized 
 to preach, but through diffidence and temptations 
 he had almost ceased to work when I invited him 
 to accompany me to my country appointments. Be- 
 lieving he was of the pure material, I exhorted him 
 not to become faint, but to double his diligence. 
 He soon after joined the Conference, and on this his 
 first year I enjoyed the pleasure of his partnership. 
 He became one of our most useful ministers, and 
 filled several important appointments; but he sank 
 down at noon, or rather rose to a higher orbit, as 
 we trust, to shine with brighter luster, world with- 
 out end. 0, Absalom, Absalom, my friend Absa- 
 lom! Sweet is the remembrance of thy many 
 virtues and labors. 
 
 One day, while riding my circuit near Chilli- 
 cothe, I passed a distillery. My attention was ar- 
 rested by a dog raising water with a tread-wheel. I 
 paused to watch his maneuvers. The principal came 
 to the door, and viewing me as a greenhorn, said, 
 
 "Did you ever see the like before?" 
 
 "No, sir, I never did; but I think it very appro- 
 priate. It always struck me that this business of 
 yours is extremely doggish."
 
 SCIOTO. 279 
 
 His face gathered up, like a storm off Cape Hat- 
 teras. I touched my horse, and was off. 
 
 With all our losses by removals and otherwise, 
 we had an increase of seventy-seven members. I 
 can not remember the exact number we took in, 
 but there was one singular circumstance connected. 
 At the opening of the year we ruled lines in our 
 memorandum for the record of such as might join. 
 I ruled till I thought, surely if all these lines are 
 filled we will do well; so I ceased ruling. The last 
 member I took in filled the last line. Then I 
 thought of what the dying prophet told the king 
 if he had smitten five or six times with his arrows 
 he would have consumed Syria. 
 
 The following circumstance transpired on this 
 circuit. A well-bred young man, apparently under 
 much religious concern, united himself with an ex- 
 cellent religious society. Although he had formerly 
 been rather wayward and inconstant in his life, yet 
 by his steady attendance on all the means of grace, 
 and the rapid improvement which he seemed to 
 make in his religious course, he had gained largely 
 on the affections of his classmates; and some of the 
 most pious and discerning had already begun to 
 regard him as a youth of some promise. In the 
 same neighborhood resided a comely and, in many 
 respects, a very amiable girl. Heaven had, in 
 mercy, granted her one of the greatest of all earthly 
 blessings, a pious parentage. But she was of an 
 unusually-volatile disposition, and passionately fond
 
 280 TH.E OB OSS. 
 
 of the world, its fashions and amusements. Our 
 young 'friend saw her, loved her, and finally made 
 proposals of marriage. Eliza acknowledged that 
 she was pleased with him. "But, William," said 
 she, "there is one insuperable barrier to our union. 
 You profess religion, and I have no reason to doubt 
 your sincerity. You see what a giddy, vain, and 
 heedless sinner I am. What domestic happiness do 
 you suppose will arise from our marriage? You, 
 as a man of God, would feel it to be your duty to 
 erect a family altar; I am illy qualified to partici- 
 pate in holy exercises. You would love to see 
 every thing clothed in the somber aspect of Chris- 
 tianity; I might love to shine out with my fashion- 
 able friends. Consider the great gulf that lies 
 between us. It is true, it is not impassable. But 
 I am not prepared to come over to you, at present. 
 It remains for you to consider whether you can 
 forego your religious associations to accommodate 
 me." William, with a sorrowful countenance and 
 heavy sigh, observed that he would consider the 
 matter. A few days after, in a heartless and reluct- 
 ant manner, he requested the leader to have his 
 name erased from the class-book when the preacher 
 came round. The leader, supposing he was laboring 
 under some cruel temptation of the enemy, urged 
 him to confide in his integrity, and unbosom all his 
 sorrows. The more solicitous the leader was to 
 dissuade him from his purpose, the more earnestly 
 he pressed his suit. The preacher, judging from
 
 s c i o T o . 281 
 
 the vehemency of his manner, that all was not 
 right, and that it might be more creditable to the 
 Church to let him go, granted his request. 
 
 It was not long before he stood before Eliza, and 
 renewed his suit. She observed, 
 
 "You are aware of the only difficulty that lies in 
 the way " 
 
 Before she finished the sentence, he exclaimed, 
 with a smile, 
 
 "0, that is removed my name is taken from the 
 book I am no longer a Church member." 
 
 The young lady fell back in her chair. A deadly 
 paleness overspread her face, and with quivering lips 
 she said, 
 
 "I will never consent to marry you while the 
 world stands. It is true I am wild and irreligious; 
 but the pious instructions of my parents, the relig- 
 ious opportunities which I have had, the many 
 heart-searching sermons which I have heard, have 
 for a long time disturbed my peace, and have de- 
 termined me not to choose death. In view of my 
 natural proneness to ruin, I had determined to 
 marry none but a man who would help me to save 
 my soul. I had flattered myself that you were such 
 a character, but thought it would be safe to try 
 your steadfastness. "When the proposal to leave 
 your class was first made, if you had rejected it 
 with a manly and holy indignation, you would have 
 received my hand on the spot. When you promised 
 
 to consider the matter, I saw an indecision of char- 
 
 24 

 
 282 THE CROSS. 
 
 acter that made me tremble. But even after so 
 many days' deliberation, if you had returned and said 
 that you loved Zion above your chief joy above 
 father and mother and wife and all, then I could 
 have confided my life in your hands. But the die 
 is cast. You will please never mention the subject 
 again forever. ' ' 
 
 We hope the reader will never realize the anguish 
 of the rejected suitor. The Church avoided him as 
 an insincere and dangerous character. The world, 
 more cruel,^ reserved him as a standing target of 
 ridicule. Some think that a compromising course, 
 in religious matters, is most likely to win over their 
 irreligious friends and connections. Hence they 
 have relaxed their fervor in the services of the 
 sanctuary. They have even admitted the propriety 
 of things which were doubtful, and shaped their 
 profession too much in conformity with the views of 
 the world. This, we will admit, has often warded 
 off persecution, and has sometimes restored peace in 
 families; but it is a peace that impoverishes piety, 
 enervates the soul, and is always bought at the ex- 
 pense of the Cross and kingdom of Jesus Christ. 
 We doubt whether this vacillating policy has ever 
 saved a soul. Steadfastness and decision of faith 
 have, and always will, where salvation is possible.
 
 MIAMI CIECUIT. 283 
 
 XXI. 
 
 MIAMI AND MAD RIVER CIRCUITS. 
 
 WE were appointed to Miami circuit, with An- 
 drew M'Clain in charge, and John Collins presiding 
 elder. We deem it unnecessary to give the bound- 
 aries of every circuit and the history of every 
 appointment. This would fill a volume; for every* 
 society has an interesting record, and the remem- 
 brance of events very pleasant to its own circle. 
 But, as an example of the circuits of the time, we 
 will say that this circuit had twenty-eight appoint- 
 ments, and the reader can judge of the rest days, 
 or account, if he please, for the absence of bron- 
 chitis. The circuit approached within five miles of 
 Lebanon, embracing Hamilton, Blue Bock, Cheviot, 
 neighborhood of Clevestown, through Cincinnati to 
 Fulton, Columbia, Helltown, Carthage, Madisonville, 
 Indian Hill, and Germantown, within two miles of 
 Milford, with minor intervening places. The ground 
 now comprises seven stations, and five circuits, and 
 part of two districts. This was, in that day, a very 
 religious country. People would come from all parts 
 to our quarterly or two-days' meetings; and gener- 
 ally they would not come in vain, but carry the
 
 284 THE CROSS. 
 
 hallowed fire to their homes and to their classes. 
 We had not been settled here long, before the 
 brethren sent to us a wagon-load of provisions, of 
 divers kinds, from Indian Hill, about ten miles 
 distant. 
 
 We rode this circuit again, in 1845 and 1846. 
 It was then very much curtailed in extent. I was 
 associated, these two years, with J. W. Steele, an- 
 other noble-hearted colleague not soon to be forgot- 
 ten ; and we had for our presiding elder, Zachariah 
 Connell. Again I was returned to this circuit, in 
 1858, with brother Levi White William Herr 
 presiding elder. So we have been well acquainted 
 with the most of the old members for many years, 
 and can testify that some of the excellent of the 
 earth are found among them. On my last year 
 there, we had much affliction in our family, and my 
 wife's sister died. Dr. John Cox attended us night 
 and day. I expected the bill to be high -justly 
 so and would have met it cheerfully if it had 
 taken my horse; but he generously refused any 
 compensation. I feel under everlasting obligations 
 to him. In my travel of forty years, I have found 
 the doctors uniformly kind, and have wondered 
 that the preachers do not make inore of them stew- 
 ards. They understand our frame. On one circuit, 
 where a doctor might have brought a heavy bill 
 against me, he was urged by some of the stewards 
 to do so, as it would so nicely foot the quarterage, 
 but he indignantly rejected the proposal. So it is;
 
 MAD RIVER CIRCUIT. 285 
 
 there are some stewards who do n't care how the 
 minister is paid whether in money, or pumpkins, 
 or calomel and jalap; whereas, if they were of the 
 spirit of Christ, they would pay the physician 
 inasmuch as physic is not allowed with fuel and 
 table expenses. 
 
 MAD RIVER CIRCUIT. 
 
 1828-29. This circuit was considered, at. this 
 time, as the garden of the Lord in Ohio, and 
 Urbana as the midst of the garden, where waved 
 the Tree of Life. Burroughs Westlake was the 
 preacher in charge. He was a good preacher, an 
 honest man, and guileless almost to a fault. He just 
 spoke what he thought of every man; but he spoke 
 it to him rather than to another. This, of course, 
 frequently gave offense. We often expostulated 
 with him, arguing that it was not necessary that 
 we should speak out all our mind, and that there 
 was no deceit in holding back what might raise a 
 squall. 
 
 One day, after a tiresome ride, he stopped at the 
 house of a prominent member not on the Urbana 
 circuit and the brother was not at home, but the 
 family invited him in. According to his descrip- 
 tion the house was disgustingly filthy, and the floor 
 fearfully slippery. He withdrew immediately, and 
 rode on to the next house. This cottage was as 
 clean as a iiew pin, the coverlets like driven snow. 
 Although a stranger, he was warmly solicited to
 
 THE CROSS. 
 
 stay all night. This he did, although the inmates 
 were clothed in a skin not the color of his own. 
 The brother whose house he had left had him 
 arraigned for quitting his house so abruptly and 
 lodging with a negro man. He insisted that the 
 preacher had some hidden prejudice against him, 
 and he had a right to demand what it was before 
 the quarterly conference. Westlake arose and said, 
 as the brother demanded of him the reason of his 
 conduct, he would, with Christian candor, give it. 
 He then went on to describe very closely the filthy 
 condition of the brother's house, the appearance of 
 his wife and children, the unwholesome odor of the 
 atmosphere around, and concluded by saying he 
 would not feel easy if his horse had to pass a night 
 under the brother's roof. True, he did stop with 
 an African family, but they were distinguished for 
 their Christian cleanliness. He had nothing against 
 the brother, as he was an entire stranger. The 
 brother, finding he had nothing criminal against 
 him, as he supposed, but only a matter of taste, 
 sat quietly down, and pushed the investigation no 
 further. 
 
 At one of his appointments there was a member 
 of another Church who always staid in class meet- 
 ing, and would sometimes speak disrespectfully of 
 the proceedings. After leading class one day, West- 
 lake observed him, and said, "Stranger, you are at 
 liberty to speak." The stranger arose, and was 
 eloquent in praise of the means of grace, and told
 
 MAD EIVER CIRCUIT. 287 
 
 how he enjoyed the privilege, etc., and sat down. 
 Burroughs looked on him, and said, "Brother, we 
 are willing that you should call occasionally, and 
 partake of our sweetmeats and tidbits; but mind 
 you, we do not want you to take up your lodging 
 with us, unless you become one of the family." 
 This gave everlasting offense to many of our old 
 members. 
 
 My colleague was the strongest man I ever knew 
 in a running conversational argument, and he was 
 full of the most spicy wit. Late one night, I was 
 lying in the preachers' tent, at a camp meeting, 
 awaiting sleep; but a noisy, verbose, jolly, and irre- 
 sponsible Universalist was seated in a crowd on the 
 camp-ground, and playing, as he might suppose, the 
 piano-forte on them with his silvery tongue. Pres- 
 ently I heard the voice of Westlake among them, 
 asking him some very simple questions in the tone 
 and manner of a hopeless greenhorn. I looked out; 
 there he was seated among them, so disguised that 
 his friends could not know him except by his voice. 
 The orator, at first, was very gracious in instruct- 
 ing his unknown disciple, and we felt impatient 
 with the round-about approaches of the inquirer. 
 At last the teacher began to ridicule Solomon, and 
 made many vulgar remarks about his wives and 
 concubines. Here Westlake, with great simplicity, 
 said, 
 
 "But don't you think Solomon said some wise 
 things?"
 
 THE CROSS. 
 
 "When? I want to know, when?" 
 
 "Why, he said, 'Though thou shouldst bray a 
 fool in a mortar, among wheat, with a pestle, yet 
 will not his foolishness depart from him.' " 
 
 Here the battle commenced amid repeated roars 
 of laughter. The Universalist showed considerable 
 low wit for a while, till he had exhausted the 
 meager dogmas and stereotyped arguments of his 
 profession. Then Westlake played upon him, cheered 
 by the applause of the surrounding group, which 
 every moment became larger and larger. His an- 
 tagonist at last inquired in a respectful tone, "Are 
 you not a Methodist preacher?" A horse on the 
 outskirts was heard to neigh very impressively, and 
 an eloquent voice in the crowd exclaimed, "Yes, 
 yes, I hear you, and will be there in a minute." 
 
 Westlake was eccentric, though religiously so. 
 Sometimes when preaching delightfully, if he heard 
 no Amen! it all went for little with him. One 
 time, while preaching in the evening, at Urbana, to 
 a large congregation, he suddenly stopped, and said, 
 "Can I get no Amen? I would give a fi'pennybit 
 to any one that would say Amen ! You do n't know 
 how it would help me." A drunkard, who was 
 rocking to and fro in the crowd, cried as loud as 
 he was able, "Amen, and Amen!" The preacher, 
 making no question of the author, sprung his luff, 
 and had a good time. Early the next morning one 
 of those who are accused in the Bible of rising 
 early, appeared at the parsonage, and told my
 
 MAD RIVEE CIRCUIT. 289 
 
 brother that he was the man who helped him out 
 of his scrape last night, when none of his brethren 
 would give him a lift, and he called for his fip. 
 
 "What do you want with it?" 
 
 " Why, to get a dram this morning to wash down 
 the cobwebs, to be sure." 
 
 " I can't give you money to buy drams, certainly." 
 
 "Can a minister of the Gospel break a promise 
 given before three or four hundred people?" 
 
 Westlake found himself outgeneraled, and had to 
 fork over to feed the groggery. He had reached a 
 knot that he could neither loosen nor cut. 
 
 Toward the close of the first year I strongly 
 urged my colleague to let me take up a collection 
 for the Missionary Society. This was rather a new 
 thing. There were societies, here and there, who 
 sent up contributions, and some were gathered from 
 individuals. Westlake was at first opposed to this. 
 
 "Why, brother L., this will prevent our pay. 
 We had better give a liberal donation ourselves; 
 for it will come out of us." 
 
 My argument was, that the more a Christian 
 gave the more liberal he would become. Still I 
 felt that my stand was somewhat problematical. 
 So we did not do it. At the end of the year we 
 did not get all our pay. The next year I urged 
 the matter so as to get his consent. What was the 
 result? The Urbana circuit paid Westlake and his 
 children and myself our quarterage and table ex- 
 penses, and bought a nice parsonage, and gave us 
 
 29
 
 290 THE CEOSS. 
 
 fifty dollars missionary money to carry to Confer- 
 ence. When we made the report there was silence 
 in Conference for the space of some seconds, when 
 our elder, brother J. B. Finley, arose and begged 
 us to inform the Conference how we got so much. 
 Since that day we have done what we could for the 
 Missionary Society. But many of us who set the 
 ball in motion, and have increased its impetus ever 
 since, are never detailed to present its claims at 
 Conference. It is a subject which affords a fine 
 opportunity for those who are eloquent of speech. 
 One of our brethren was once eulogizing the mis- 
 sionary enterprise and the itinerant power on the 
 Conference floor, and presently he broke out in the 
 impassioned quotation, 
 
 , "Should fate command me to the farthest verge 
 Of the green earth, to " 
 
 "Stop there, brother," said a preacher from 
 Michigan, "we want just such men as you in our 
 green 'verge.' " 
 
 This cut off the speech at once, like the negro 
 who prayed that the Lord would curtail the devil 
 "smack smoove." The brother had never straddled 
 a pair of saddle-bags, and, perhaps, never intended 
 to. Let it not be supposed that we are hinting 
 after such jobs now. The time has gone by, and if 
 we could not expatiate on this theme which our 
 soul loved in the ardor and prime of noon, we will 
 hardly dishonor it before a Conference with the 
 snuff of our eloquence.
 
 MAD RIVER CIRCUIT. 
 
 This year we attended a large camp meeting on 
 the road between Urbana and Troy. I preached on 
 the Sabbath, before a crowded congregation, a sea- 
 sermon. Toward the close a melting influence 
 descended on the congregation. Many of the 
 members were walking the aisles, shaking hands, and 
 their faces seemed to shine, while shouts and rejoic- 
 ing rolled over the ground. That was a good meet- 
 ing throughout. Some years after this, while the 
 Conference was sitting in Cincinnati, my landlady 
 told me there was a gentleman in the parlor wishing 
 to see me. When I went in I saw a very genteel 
 and intelligent person, who said, we were both 
 strangers to each other, in a certain sense, but he 
 had come some distance principally to see me. He 
 asked if I did not, some years ago, preach at a camp 
 meeting near Troy, and preach from a certain text. 
 I answered in the affirmative. "Well," said he, "I 
 was a thoughtless, irreligious young man, making a 
 tour through Ohio, and that camp meeting being 
 near my road, I thought I would stop and rest a 
 little while; so I tied up. I seated myself in the 
 crowd. Till that time I had never heard preaching; 
 that is, I never paid enough attention to a discourse 
 throughout so as to derive any benefit. Some of 
 your phraseology being singular, fixed my attention 
 till you had finished, when I pursued my journey, 
 but under convictions which have eventuated in my 
 conversion, and I have, for several years, been a 
 preacher in another Conference. I wished for a long
 
 292 THE CROSS. 
 
 time to know who the minister was that had been 
 instrumental in reaching my case. Lately I saw a 
 preacher whom I recognized as one who was at that 
 camp meeting, and asked him if he could tell me 
 who it was that preached that sermon. I got your 
 name, and thought it was my duty to report to 
 you." When he told me his name, I recollected 
 seeing it frequently in the Advocate in connection 
 with good works. 
 
 When he had left, my soul was overwhelmed with 
 gratitude to God. It is said, "he who turns a sin- 
 ner [one sinner] from the error of his way, shall 
 save a soul from death, and hide a multitude of 
 sins." Then I thought, "And if that sinner should 
 become a minister, and save others, and so on to 
 the end of time, till the enlarging circles shall 
 strike the shores of eternity, who can tell the 
 eternal consequences of a word spoken in season?" 
 Then I thought that the Savior said to his elated 
 disciples, "Rejoice not in this, that the devils are 
 subject to your power; but rejoice in that your 
 names are written in the book of life." Yes, our 
 reward is pendent on that. 
 
 "Lord, what are all my sufferings here, 
 
 If thou but count me meet 
 With that enraptured host to appear, 
 And worship at thy feet!" 
 
 May the Lord save that brother, whether North or 
 South! What is Mason and Dixon's line to Al- 
 mighty Power?
 
 MAD RIVER CIRCUIT. 293 
 
 It was on this circuit that we first received the 
 outlines of the rules of the Kadical Church, drawn 
 up and issued by the collected wisdom of that 
 organization. I do not mean all the wisdom, for we 
 had a considerable embodiment of it in the person 
 of one of their leading agitators, who held his mem- 
 bership on our circuit, and who had not attended 
 the conclave. This was brother Joseph Mitchell, 
 commonly called "Yankee Mitchell," not out of dis- 
 respect, but to distinguish him from the numerous 
 family of Mitchells then ranging our camp. He 
 was an acute, fluent minister; but not an orator in 
 the common acceptation of the word, neither did he 
 pretend to be. But all that Calvinist or Arminian 
 knew of controversy's vast art, was to this Mitchell 
 known. In his youthful days he was, doubtless, in- 
 strumental in turning hundreds, if not thousands, 
 in New England, to the doctrines of Methodism. 
 He was terrible too on baptism. When preaching 
 controversy and, what else did he preach? his 
 delivery was as rapid, as cutting, as interesting as 
 that of a smart, racy old woman when scolding. 
 Every body who held to the truth loved to hear 
 him. He was the presiding elder of Lorenzo Dow 
 at his debut. Lorenzo, every now and then, taken 
 with a sudden impression, would shoot off from his 
 circuit like a wandering star, and Mitchell would 
 have to push after him and bring him back to his 
 moorings. Lorenzo would cry and promise to do 
 better, but complained of his galling harness. Now,
 
 294 THE CEOSS. 
 
 whether the youth had caught this wandering infec- 
 tion from his elder, or the elder was overpowered 
 by the logic of his pupil, we can not say; but cer- 
 tain it is that Mitchell fell into the same cosmopo- 
 litish habits; and at the time we knew him he 
 was in the habit of making an annual tour of all 
 the States, if not the Territories also, of the Union; 
 any how, he was at home when the Eeformed Dis- 
 cipline appeared. We crowded to him to know 
 what he thought of the missive. He looked it over 
 and rubbed his eyes; he looked it over again and 
 scratched his head, and then exclaimed something 
 like this, "As the Lord liveth! I could go to sleep 
 and dream a better discipline than this." 
 
 About this time the ministers of that connection 
 were making heavy efforts on our circuit. There 
 was one place ^where we had taken in a number of 
 young people. While they were rejoicing in their 
 first love, they were told that they had taken shel- 
 ter under an unmixed despotism. As they had 
 been lately converted, and knew but little about the 
 constitution of Methodism, they became alarmed. 
 What rendered their situation more perilous was, 
 there were a few of the old members who looked 
 favorably on the innovation. Brother Westlake took 
 considerable pains to show the matter in its proper 
 light, and succeeded to some extent. Some of our 
 best men urged that it was better to say nothing 
 about it, and quietly let things take their course. 
 But there was a higher voice, saying, "Son of man,
 
 MAD RIVER CIRCUIT. 295 
 
 I have made thee a watchman unto the house of 
 Israel; therefore, hear the word at my mouth and 
 give them warning from me." When I came again 
 to that appointment I was supplied with the new 
 Discipline. I understood that notice had been given 
 that a Eeformed Methodist Church would be organ- 
 ized next Sabbath. Some of our old members feared 
 that there would be a large split. The congrega- 
 tion was large. As it was my regular time to read 
 and explain the Discipline, I preached very short; 
 then read the rules without comment; then, to 
 the surprise of many, pulled out the rules of the 
 Radical Church, showed the contrast in several im- 
 portant points not forgetting the clause that threw 
 a sanctity over all property acknowledged by the 
 laws of the States, and which Joseph Mitchell him- 
 self had denounced as a covert for slavery. I knew 
 where I was standing, and I understood their cue. 
 I exhorted them not to suppose that I was meddling 
 unnecessarily with the rules of another Church, as 
 they all knew that the last time a Radical preacher 
 was there, he had done us the kindness to preach 
 on our rules, and one good turn deserves another. 
 The day of "organization'" came, but our ranks 
 were unbroken. 
 
 Brother James B. Finley was, without exception, 
 the most useful man of our connection in the West. 
 He had not a polished education. This, we believe, 
 was his own fault. His father superintended a 
 most excellent school, in which some of the first 

 
 296 THE CROSS. 
 
 men of Kentucky received a liberal education. 
 When we say it was his own fault, we mean he 
 did not lack the opportunity of a teacher, or the 
 acuteness necessary to comprehend; but his dispo- 
 sition was adventurous and enterprising, and his 
 physical and mental energy corresponded, and it 
 was a mercy that he learned any English, with so 
 many wild deer and turkeys peeping at him in his 
 walks. 
 
 His father said John could preach, but James 
 was a tolerable exhorter. All we might draw from 
 this was that James was impatient of the old school 
 systematizing, yet he would set his congregation on 
 fire before his father would lay down his introduc- 
 tion. Still his father was an excellent specimen of 
 the Presbyterian type, and justly popular, in the 
 strength of his manhood. He excelled in sermoniz- 
 ing with his pen, and preached well extemporane- 
 ously. James, sometimes in the impetuosity of zeal, 
 might speak or act unadvisedly, but when con- 
 vinced, no man, in my knowledge, was more ready 
 to make humble confession. 
 
 In examining the character of a certain minister 
 who had been suspended, our elder, having received 
 wrong impressions of the case, left his seat to advo- 
 cate the cause of the defendant; and being wrongly 
 posted in the matter, his reasoning and conclusions 
 were all defective in the estimation of the quarterly 
 conference. Brother "Westlake, in his quaint but 
 good-natured way, said, "Brother Finley, may not
 
 MAD KIVER CIECUIT. 297 
 
 some of us sit in that chair? Our conference is 
 without a president while you are pleading." He 
 quickly resumed his seat, saying, "This conference 
 acts like a parcel of little children." We adjourned 
 awhile to return to the camp-ground and dine. 
 After dinner Westlake met the elder on the ground, 
 and said, "Brother Finley, do you think you did 
 well in saying that such a venerable body of men 
 acted like children?" He turned away, not in 
 anger, but apparently afflicted. When the confer- 
 ence reassembled, brother Finley occupied the chair 
 in silence, and seemed to be absorbed in serious re- 
 flections, till we became impatient. He then arose, 
 with tears in his eyes, and said, "Brethren, I am 
 unfitted to perform the duties of my office till I 
 make suitable amends. When I look around on 
 this assembly my eyes light on old venerable Meth- 
 odists, who were humbly serving God while I was 
 a wicked sinner, and some may have been official 
 members before I was a preacher; but before we 
 adjourned I said, 'you did business like little chil- 
 dren.' I hope you will forgive me, one and all." 
 We all fell on our knees, and, 0, what a prayer! 
 It seemed as if all the bottles of heaven were 
 opened, and were pouring on our Assembly. When 
 he came to understand the case correctly, he seemed 
 to be more than ever afflicted at his course. No 
 man ever discharged the duties of a presiding elder 
 better than he; and we could write a chapter in his 
 praise, but his life is before the world.
 
 298 THE CROSS. 
 
 About this time the disaffected members with- 
 drew from our Church, and caused considerable 
 decrease.
 
 ZANESVILLE CIRCUIT. 299 
 
 XXII. 
 ZANESVILLE CIRCUIT. 
 
 1830. THE Conference was held this year in 
 Urbana. Some of the friends from Chillicothe told 
 me I would be sent there. I did not place much 
 confidence in this till some of higher authority 
 confirmed the rumor. The last morning of the 
 Conference, the appointments were to be read out, 
 and I thought as my calling and election was sure, 
 and as I had been run down in attending on the 
 session, there was no necessity for my going to hear 
 my appointment. Then again it occurred to my 
 mind that this would be mean and selfish. I ought 
 to go, and hear, and sympathize. I felt as calm as 
 Summer evenings are, till the bishop came to Chil- 
 licothe district; he read Chillicothe, but said 
 nothing about A. M. L., and he kept silence about 
 him till he had gone through that and another dis- 
 trict or two, and I was looking out for New Vir- 
 ginia, when it came out Zanesville. Some who had 
 strongly assured me my name was down for Chilli- 
 cothe, came to apologize. They said on the last 
 evening some brother, who had found out where he 
 was appointed, had broke traces; and this caused
 
 300 THE CROSS. 
 
 several removals on the chess-board, and threw me 
 off more than one hundred miles. Here was a ship 
 to pay, and no pitch hot. But we addressed our- 
 selves to the journey. On arriving on the field of 
 labor we stopped with a pious brother. "While sit- 
 ting by his blazing fire in the evening, he said, 
 "Brother, where have you been traveling?" 
 "On the Miamis and the Mad River." 
 "0, yes, you have been down in the back parts, 
 but the Conference has highly favored you now. 
 They have sent you to the garden of Ohio." 
 
 "Which end of the State did you come in at, 
 brother?" 
 
 "Why, I came in at this end why?" 
 "Because if you had come through the Miami 
 and Mad River country, you would never have seen 
 these hills." 
 
 There was no parsonage on the circuit, no place 
 to put my goods. In this dilemma we were laid 
 under lasting obligations by Dr. E. D. Roe, now of 
 the Cincinnati Conference, and his amiable lady. 
 They took care of us till, with the assistance of some 
 of the brethren, we purchased a lot with a log- 
 house on it in the town of Norwich. It was a tol- 
 erably new building, and we thought it would 
 answer for a kitchen when the circuit had time and 
 means to improve it. 
 
 One of my successors gave me an awful tongue- 
 lashing about purchasing the property. I told him 
 if he had hung as long by the eyelids as I had, he
 
 ZANESVILLE CIRCUIT. 301 
 
 would be glad to get in a manger, and it was his 
 province to improve-it. Dr. Eoe was, at that time, 
 a merchant in very brisk business. I believe I 
 licensed him to exhort. At first he did not attend 
 much to this. When expostulated with, he said he 
 was so busy from morning till night through the 
 week, that he had but little time to study, and but 
 little heart to hold meetings. I then told him to 
 examine his case closely. If he was not clearly 
 convinced that it was his duty to preach, to give it 
 up, for he was in good business, and might get rich 
 and do much good, and serve God acceptably; but 
 if, on the other hand, he was confident in his call, 
 then he should give up his business, however prom- 
 ising it might be, and devote himself altogether to 
 his work. Soon after I left the circuit he was an- 
 nounced in the Minutes. \ : .'ft 
 This was the year of the organization of the Rad- 
 ical Church in this part of the State. In reading 
 the appointments of that Church, I was astounded 
 to find that they had embraced several of our 
 classes, and had hardly left me root or branch. In 
 making out their numbers, they had counted up 
 whole classes that had been returned to me. Still 
 I thought- 1 would go to these classes and bid them 
 "good-by." But I found them generally steadfast 
 and immovable, and glad to see their own preacher. 
 The disaffected ministers had visited them several 
 times, and because they had treated them hospita- 
 bly, and did not quarrel with them, they thought
 
 302 THE CROSS. 
 
 they might count the chickens before the eggs were 
 hatched. However, there were some individuals at 
 all these appointments who joined them subse- 
 quently. It is astonishing what frivolous excuses 
 some made for leaving in this split. The work had 
 begun before we left Urbana circuit. A very grave 
 and sour-looking old member told brother Westlake 
 before a large class, that he wished to withdraw; 
 that he had no fault to find with bishops, or gov- 
 ernment, or any such thing; but that our Disci- 
 pline forbids us to sing "songs which did not tend 
 to the knowledge or love of God." 
 
 Westlake rose up very solemnly and said, 
 
 "Well, brethren, this brother wants to withdraw 
 from us because our Church does not approve of his 
 singing 'dump de diddle' and 'congu mingo.' We 
 will have to let him go." 
 
 The old man laughed, and the class gave a sym- 
 pathizing echo. 
 
 One, after he had left us, was applied to for some 
 quarterage. 
 
 "What, do you want quarterage? This was what 
 I left the old side for money, money! I might as 
 well have staid where I was." 
 
 No doubt, many left for good reasons, as they 
 supposed ; a number left because they had lost their 
 taste for class meetings, a sure sign of their deca- 
 dence in grace. We could not see how any warm- 
 hearted Christian could object to class meetings or 
 love-feasts. We know it is said they are not Gospel
 
 ZANESVILLE CIRCUIT. 303 
 
 ordinances; neither are the Bible and missionary 
 societies. The Lord has revealed the elements of 
 salvation, but has left much for Christian ingenuity 
 to accomplish, suitable to different ages and coun- 
 tries. In regard to our physical wellbeing, the 
 Lord did not create houses and agricultural imple- 
 ments; but he gave us forests and ore, and 
 endowed man with powers of perpetual progress, 
 so that he might have something to do. Man pro- 
 gressed in invention and discovery the bamboo 
 tent, the log-cabin, the stately mansion rose up in 
 succession; the rude blade, the reap-hook, the cradle, 
 the mowing machine, corn-planter, etc.; so that the 
 time may come when the once laborious work of the 
 farmer may become a diversion of unbounded amuse- 
 ment and delight. The Lord never intended man 
 to be physically idle why should we be spiritually 
 lazy? We have a right to institute prudential 
 means that are of evident utility, and in their spirit 
 Scriptural. We then inquired, are our love-feasts 
 and class meetings Scriptural in their features and 
 ingredients? Let us analyze them. They, for they 
 are twin means, are constituted of three Scriptural 
 duties prayer, praise, communion. Can any Chris- 
 tian object to prayer? "Pray without ceasing." 
 "Ask and you shall receive." "Men ought always 
 to pray." "Pray for one another." 
 
 Can any object to praise? "Praise God sing 
 praises unto God." "Speak to one another in 
 psalms, and hymns, and spiritual songs, making
 
 304 THE CROSS. 
 
 melody in your hearts." And who will object to 
 the communion of saints? This exercise has been 
 dear to all the distinguished saints of God in all 
 ages. The Christian does not love to eat his morsel 
 alone. In sister Churches now they have their 
 "conversational meetings," "conferences," and "in- 
 quiry meetings." These meetings, under different 
 names, are constituted of the three simple ingredi- 
 ents prayer, praise, Christian communion. It 
 seems to be the prevailing opinion of the pious 
 that this communion or interchange of religious 
 sentiment will constitute a delightful exercise in 
 heaven. We can not tell what will be the way of 
 human interlocution in the new creation whether 
 by the present slow communication of speech, word 
 by word, or whether we will intuitively understand 
 the body of the communication in a flash. But it is 
 highly reasonable that the most beloved theme of 
 Christians on earth will enter deeply into their ce- 
 lestial converse. And if this sweet communion will 
 enter into the celestial enjoyments of the saints in 
 light, how jealous of ourselves we should be, if we 
 love not such gracious opportunities on earth! 
 
 As our field had been especially cultivated by the 
 Eeformers so called we suffered a .declension in 
 number quite a number left.
 
 DELAWARE CIRCUIT. 305 
 
 XXIII. 
 DELAWARE CIRCUIT. 
 
 1831-32. MY first year on this circuit was in 
 connection with, brother Samuel Shaw, a rather 
 eccentric but very upright man. It was a success- 
 ful year, and we had a good time. The next year, 
 brother David Cadwallader was my colleague on 
 the same circuit. He was, in my opinion, the most 
 simple-hearted, holy man ever connected with the 
 Ohio Conference in my day. When he first came 
 to this country from Wales, he settled down among 
 some of his own countrymen, some of whom he had 
 known on the other side of the Atlantic. He had 
 not been long among them before he heard some of 
 them shout in their meetings. He had never heard 
 the like before, and he was filled with indignation. 
 He reproved them sharply, telling them that God 
 was a God of order, and not of confusion. He was 
 afraid that the Methodism, which he loved so 
 ardently on the other side of the water, was gradu- 
 ally depreciating into fanaticism. After a while, he . 
 heard some who were of undoubted piety and sound 
 minds indulging in the same practice. This led 
 him to doubt whether he might not be wrong. He 
 
 passed through a season of deep affliction, strong 
 
 26
 
 306 THE CROSS. 
 
 cries, and tears on this very account; and he im- 
 plored the Lord, if he was wrong in opposing his 
 brethren, that he would manifest it to him in some 
 way. On one occasion a resistless gale of love 
 swept over his soul, and before he knew what he 
 was doing, he was shouting at the top of his voice. 
 This convinced him it was no sin; but, as if to 
 keep him convinced, he was made to shout on all 
 interesting religious occasions ever after. 
 
 On one occasion he had received at Conference an 
 appointment to a Welsh mission in one of the East- 
 ern States. Subsequently he fell into doubt whether 
 it was in the order of Providence. He was return- 
 ing from Conference, in company with several young 
 ministers but he was in poor company. They were 
 elated with the prospects opening before them, and 
 indulged in innocent mirth. He lagged behind, in 
 agonizing prayer, under a thick cloud. In the even- 
 ing they put up at a village tavern. The house was 
 crowded with men who were employed in cutting 
 the canal. -The preachers slept in a long, upper 
 room, which was well occupied. Under the circum- 
 stances they were very restless, and indulged some 
 in talk. Cadwallader still prayed. About midnight 
 one of the brethren drew the curtain of a window, 
 and, looking out on the bright moonlight, said, 
 "Surely, it'is day." At that moment Cadwallader 
 got supremely blessed, and he sprang on the floor, 
 and exclaimed, "Yes, glory to God, it is day! day- 
 light through all my soul !" And he shouted on,
 
 DELAWARE CIRCUIT. 307 
 
 without limitation. A man and his wife, who slept 
 in one corner, arose and gathered on their clothes, 
 and the man cried out, "Brethren, pray for us. 
 Some time ago I came to work on the canal. A 
 pious yodRg man, a member of my class, came with 
 me. When he had worked a little while, he said he 
 would go home again, because, if he staid here, he 
 would certainly lose his soul. I laughed at him, 
 and I staid and now all my religion is clean gone. 
 0, pray for us !" The brethren prayed and sung. 
 Cadwallader started down stairs, shouting. The 
 bar-room floor was covered with Irish laborers, 
 packed close like a box of smoked herrings. They 
 rose in great fright, and scattered every- where; the 
 family came pouring down, and two young ladies 
 were converted. There was no more sleeping that 
 night. Cadwallader's horse was brought out last, 
 and the young brethren pushed on. On their way, 
 they began to discuss their bills, thinking they 
 were unusually high; and they turned round, and 
 said, " Brother Cad., what did that old tavern-keeper 
 charge you?" With an innocent smile, he said, 
 " Just nothing at all. He said he would not charge 
 such a man as I was, and he invited me to call and 
 see him again." As innocent as my colleague was, 
 he would sometimes join with the brethren in re- 
 marking on my horsemanship. In the Spring of 
 the year, he came home one day in a wretched 
 plight. We inquired what was the matter. He 
 said, in coming over Crawford's plains, he saw a
 
 308 THE CROSS. 
 
 most beautiful plat of young grass not far from the 
 road; and it looked so smooth and inviting, he 
 thought he would ride over it; but his horse had 
 hardly got his length on it, before both horse and 
 rider were almost swallowed up in it; bu^he scuf- 
 fled out, with the loss of his hat. I told him he 
 had often remarked on my riding; but I had passed 
 that same beautiful oasis, and was tempted to ride 
 over it; but, seeing that the cattle grazed every- 
 where but on that strip of tender grass, I thought 
 if they were dubious I might well beware so I 
 kept the homely road. "Well, brother, I will say 
 no more about your riding. I saw the cattle, too, 
 but did not follow out the argument." Our circuit 
 took in three county seats Delaware, Marion, and 
 Bucyrus embracing the plains of Crawford, almost 
 to the Wyandott reservation. The snow covered 
 the ground for nearly three months. In my little 
 jumper I sailed over the undulating surface, and 
 almost imagined I was at sea again. We had a 
 blessed revival almost universal taking in up- 
 ward of four hundred members; so that the circuit 
 had to be divided for the next year. The revival 
 at Bucyrus was great. We could not then hold 
 what we now call protracted meetings. We would 
 have to leave the work, to fill other appointments, 
 in charge of responsible brethren, who would carry 
 on a prayer meeting till we returned. Having thus 
 left Bucyrus one Sabbath evening, a crowded con- 
 gregation came out to prayer meeting. Just before
 
 DELAWARE CIRCUIT. 309 
 
 the time to begin, a preacher came in, with a pair 
 of saddle-bags on his arm, ascended the pulpit, and 
 without invitation or license, sung, prayed, and 
 preached preached bitterly against the whole econ- 
 omy of Methodism, and took peculiar pains to warn 
 seekers of religion to keep aloof from our tyrannical 
 institution. He concluded by saying some would 
 wish to know who he was. He was an old Method- 
 ist preacher, and knew what he had stated was 
 correct, and that he had been acquainted with their 
 preacher in charge for many years. He also added 
 that he was a missionary to the Wyandott Indians, 
 whither he was going. "When we came back, we 
 found the old members indignant at the deception. 
 The young members, and those who were thinking 
 of joining, were anxious to know how far his decla- 
 rations were correct; and I had to travel over 
 ground which I had fondly hoped it would not be 
 necessary to travel over in that latitude, and at 
 that late day. I was anxious to find out who he 
 was, for he told no one his name. But, in describ- 
 ing his personality, they mentioned one physical de- 
 fect, that led me to suppose he was one of the awful 
 fathers of Radicalism. This supposition was after- 
 ward found to be correct. But we survived the blow. 
 The Church of Christ is a working Church, and 
 there are few in it who can not do some good. 
 There was, in Bucyrus, a very pious member, but 
 he had no education. As he stood at the altar, 
 looking at the members engaged in the work, he
 
 310 THE CROSS. 
 
 thought, in himself, can I do nothing in this good 
 work? He saw a young man who was rather de- 
 riding the work. He said something seemed to say, 
 "Go and talk with that young man." Then he 
 thought again, that young man knows more than I 
 do; he is learned. Still something seemed, to say, 
 "Go, go!" He approached him took his hand 
 his soul was too big for utterance he burst into 
 tears and the tall and proud young man fell pros- 
 trate among the mourners. 
 
 Brother Cadwallader has passed into the heavens. 
 I know not whether any marble covers his remains; 
 but I believe that he was, in God's sight, a great 
 man. I do not say he was the most useful man 
 among us. Some men may be very useful yes, a 
 necessity of the Church and yet not be the most 
 sanctified. Peter was one. of the most useful of 
 Christ's disciples he was bold, daring, and a real 
 business man. Yet the compliment which our Lord 
 paid to Nathaniel was the most that was said of 
 him in all the history of the Gospel, but it speaks 
 volumes: "Behold an Israelite, indeed, in whom 
 there is no guile!" 
 
 Brother Bigelow was our presiding elder, and 
 was deservedly popular. His oratory consisted 
 principally in earnestness of spirit combined with 
 physical energy. His introduction would be gener- 
 ally about thirty minutes long. It was a kind of 
 fireside talk, and sometimes tiresome, and some of 
 his hearers would begin to feel fearful forebodings
 
 DELAWARE CIRCUIT. 311 
 
 about the length of his sermon. When he had 
 fairly entered upon his subject, he became very en- 
 tertaining for about an hour. Then he would 
 rise rise rise, higher and higher, for another 
 hour, till soul and body would seem to be rapt 
 in a mighty conflict of emulation. It would be 
 useless to describe his gestures; they were of all 
 kinds, and indiscriminately applied. When the 
 tempest culminated it came down on the congrega- 
 tion with a mighty shout, leaving a shower of tears, 
 and all the congregation on their feet. They were 
 not raised to their feet altogether by the power of 
 his eloquence, as some of his friends have said; but 
 while the minds of the congregation were all deeply 
 absorbed by the preacher's eloquence, tired nature 
 Would seek relief in a change of posture, and our 
 poor bodies which had been cramped up for three 
 hours, till almost entirely benumbed, would, despite 
 all human volition, rise on their feet. 
 
 No man could imitate Eussel Bigelow for want 
 of physical endurance, and he could not have com- 
 manded this for any length of time were it not he 
 was endowed with an extraordinary appetite and 
 digestive power which seldom fall to the lot of man. 
 It would have proved fatal to any common preacher 
 to have competed with him in eating pound for 
 pound in a very little time. We do not mean 
 that he was gluttonous. His constitution and ex- 
 cessive labors imperiously called for it, and what 
 would have been intemperate eating in another,
 
 312 THE CEOSS. 
 
 was in him a necessary supply and no more. Truly 
 the young preachers on the district did whether 
 unconsciously or not imitate him in some things; 
 his voice, his provincialisms, his exuberant and in- 
 expressive gestures; but these were only the hinder 
 part of the orator. They would fag out in one 
 hour in the wake of his fervor. Brother Bigelow 
 was a humble man, considering his business tact 
 and official duties; and I believe he desired to be 
 more so, and labored to habituate himself to a lowly 
 carriage. He would frequently say to the young 
 preachers, " You see, brethren, I make free to speak 
 of your faults and advise you; but this is the com- 
 mon duty of Christians. If you see any thing 
 wrong in me, tell me of it." He once said, 
 
 "Brother L., if you see any thing wrong in me, 
 tell me of it, and I will try to mend." 
 
 "Well, brother B., there is one thing in you 
 which is wrong in my opinion, and I think it is 
 wrong in the sight of the Lord, and that is your 
 treatment of your horse. You ride him furiously 
 in all seasons, and he has always a sore on his back 
 as big as my fist; you throw a piece of rag-carpet 
 on it, and you will go as far as fifteen or twenty 
 miles as fast as the animal can move; you then de- 
 liver him over to any body when you stop. The 
 Bible says a righteous man is merciful to his beast. 
 You ride so much like Jehu, that when the young 
 preachers wish to ride fast, they will whip up their 
 horses, and say, 'Come, let us Russelit.'"
 
 DELAWARE CIRCUIT. 313 
 
 While I was delivering my lecture, I saw him 
 screw up one corner of his mouth, and when I was 
 done he smiled, and seemed to regard it as one 
 of the most trifling reproofs that had ever been 
 uttered. The business he was on preaching the 
 Gospel he thought overtopped the horse and 
 every thing else. The king's business required 
 haste. 
 
 Bigelow was scrupulously exact in regard to 
 every point of Discipline, great or small. He met 
 me once on the plains, and broke loose upon me, 
 because he had heard that I had admitted a certain 
 lady to love-feast. 
 
 "Brother B., you know that she is the wife of 
 one of our leaders, and that she is very pious, 
 although not of our Church. No woman on the 
 circuit treats the preachers better. She has been 
 particularly kind in nursing you when you were 
 sick. Would you have received her husband, and 
 driven her from the door?" 
 
 " Yes, I would have kept her out." 
 
 "I do not believe Mr. Wesley ever intended no 
 exceptions. Indeed, I read otherwise in his Journal. 
 Any how, the Methodist Discipline or any other 
 power on earth shall not compel me to act in an 
 unchristian or brutal manner." 
 
 If brother Bigelow had lived till now he would 
 be borne down by the progress of this generation, 
 for he would never yield a piece of old-fashioned 
 
 Methodism as big as his thumb nail. He held the 
 27
 
 314 THE CROSS. 
 
 most orderly camp meetings ever seen in Ohio; and 
 he possessed the courage necessary to do it. At our 
 camp meeting, a citizen of Marion took his seat 
 among the ladies. Our elder very politely observed 
 that the gentleman perhaps was not present when 
 the rules were read. He then mildly gave the 
 reasons for the rule, and said he hoped he would 
 oblige us by sitting on the other side. The man's 
 face turned red with anger, but he kept his seat. 
 The elder added he had hoped that a mild request 
 would be complied with by any gentleman, but he 
 had force sufficient to remove him, and that should 
 be attended to before proceeding to any other busi- 
 ness. Seeing he was preparing for this move, the 
 man went off very angry, declaring he would whip 
 B. if he ever saw him in Marion. When our camp 
 meeting broke, the brethren of Marion strongly 
 urged Bigelow to take a by-road; but he laughed 
 and said he had determined to go back on the usual 
 road. As he passed by the man's shop, he was. 
 hailed and invited to come in. Although he had 
 been warned that he was a notorious bully, and 
 always was equal to his threatenings, yet he an- 
 swered, "Certainly." He dismounted and went in. 
 The bully said, "You have had your time, and now 
 I have mine. I am determined to thrash you, and 
 I will do it." B. observed that he would of course 
 be manly enough to give his reasons and a chance 
 for explanation. He ran over his principal griev- 
 ance, and B. asked him if he did not have his rules
 
 DELAWARE CIECUIT. 315 
 
 to govern his family and shop, and if any one came 
 in to bear down his authority if he would be such 
 a coward as to suffer it. He said he would not; 
 and taking this as his platform, he continued to 
 talk till the lion was pacified. They shook hands, 
 and the preacher was invited to call again. In one 
 word, Bigelow was one of the most useful ministers 
 in our Western country. The people would crowd 
 from every point of our circuit, and many points on 
 the neighboring circuits, to hear him at our quarterly 
 meetings. "We traveled under him many years, and 
 he lodged with us as often as he could. 
 
 I exercised the strictest discipline upon this cir- 
 cuit, catechising the classes on the General Eules. 
 One member would be examined on one rule, and 
 one on another, and a short exhortation addressed 
 to the rest on the rules under consideration; but all 
 were examined simply and singularly on the rule 
 regarding spirituous liquor. At the onset a sister in 
 one class flew into a passion, and said she held it to 
 be her privilege to drink when she pleased, and 
 what she pleased. "Well, sister, the rules provide 
 that we must bear, for a season, with those who 
 break them. This day four weeks we will be 
 round, if the Lord permit, and in the mean time I 
 will pray for you every day. I beseech you to do 
 the same, understanding that, 'if you repent not,' 
 we will be compelled to drop you." At another class 
 we found a brother who had once been a Universal- 
 ist, and was high-spirited by nature, but was pious
 
 316 THE CROSS. 
 
 and intelligent. He rose up against the rule. We 
 gave him the same advice; but I feared he would 
 prove a hard case. At the extremity of the circuit 
 I found another Amazon inebriate or user of liquor 
 as a beverage. She flew into high opposition to the 
 rule on drinking, and also that on private prayer. 
 When I got to the capital of the circuit, I antici- 
 pated trouble. There was a venerable man who 
 was leader, exhorter, and steward, who used liquor 
 habitually, and especially in harvest and log-rolling. 
 He had told me that before he embraced religion he 
 could not drink enough to intoxicate him. He used 
 to take especial delight in getting his companions to- 
 gether and drinking with them, glass for glass, till 
 he had them all down dead drunk and then he 
 would stand over them and laugh. On one occasion, 
 after drinking his usual portion through the day, he 
 bet a man five dollars that he could drink a quart 
 of brandy, measured from the pipe, without taking 
 it from his mouth. He clapped the measure to his 
 lips and tossed it off at one draught. He said in 
 one moment he was, as it were, all on fire, inside 
 and out. Death seemed to clasp him, and hell opened 
 before him. In the next moment his stomach re- 
 volted, and he threw it all up. He would tell this 
 with tears of gratitude; for he said if it had not 
 been for this instantaneous discharge he would have 
 dropped quickly into hell. He still used spirits, 
 and it was publicly known. To deal with others, 
 and pass by him, would have been wicked partiality.
 
 DELAWARE CIRCUIT. 
 
 So I put the same question to him, and he gave an 
 unfavorable answer. 
 
 On the next round, when we met in class the 
 first delinquent, she rose up, all subdued, and said 
 she had taken the advice given her; that she found 
 herself well-nigh gone, and had requested the class 
 to appoint a day of fasting and prayer. This they 
 did. Her soul was recovered out of the snare, and 
 there was a revival in the class. When I came to 
 the member who had been a Universalist, to my sur- 
 prise, he said he had thought the matter over, and 
 found that liquor did him no good, and he had de- 
 termined to keep all our good rules. The woman, 
 who said she was opposed to my examining her 
 on family prayer and drinking, was also cured. 
 She said, after she had so misbehaved in class, 
 she went home, and set about getting dinner. Her 
 husband went to his plow. When she had set the 
 table she went out and called her husband to din- 
 ner. He turned round, and said, "My dear, you 
 gave me enough in class for breakfast, dinner, and 
 supper;" and he drove on. This reached her heart; 
 she felt she had offended her pious husband; she 
 had offended the preacher; but, what was more 
 than all, she had offended the Lord. She went to 
 her closet and to her knees, and was now as humble 
 as a lamb. Now remained my old rich friend, one 
 who had been particularly kind to me. But I de- 
 termined to know no one according to the flesh; for 
 my labor was not fruitless. I had hard work here.
 
 318 THE CROSS. 
 
 I appealed to him as a steward who was appointed 
 to see that I did my duty. I told him how other 
 members had renounced liquor, and the good that 
 followed; and assured him that I would be driven to 
 the painful necessity of bringing him to trial if he 
 did not comply. I got his consent within about 
 five minutes before the time for preaching and my 
 whole circuit was cleansed of this iniquity, and all 
 the rules observed. 
 
 In the first years of my itinerancy, I always 
 found that a strict adherence to Discipline always 
 revived the Church. No man can administer it 
 now, in all points, without being regarded as a 
 tyrant, a bloody Bishop Bonner. Then it is reported 
 he is not acceptable to the people; and then the very 
 power that has pledged him, when entering into holy 
 orders, to administer the Discipline "with a firm 
 but mild hand," has to put him where they can get 
 him. Now, if we have come to the day when all 
 the obsolete requirements of the Discipline can not 
 be administered, the General Conference ought to 
 do them away, so that the new ministers ought not 
 to be required to promise to do what the old men 
 know they can not do. If the rule on class meet- 
 ings should be enforced now, as in ancient days, it 
 would cut off one-third of our membership and dis- 
 affect another. We know that there are some ex- 
 ceptions. For this cause we have of late years 
 sought to be excused from the charge.
 
 MOUNT VERNON CIKCUIT. 319 
 
 XXIV. 
 MOUNT VERNON CIRCUIT. 
 
 1833-34. WILLIAM WESTLAKE rode with me on 
 this circuit the first year, and Charles Lovell the 
 last. When we arrived at Mount Vernon, there 
 was great excitement about the cholera, which was 
 reported to be advancing in different directions. 
 While preaching in a crowded school-house, on 
 Sunday evening, it was announced in the congrega- 
 tion, that one of the doctors, who had been out to 
 attend a case of the cholera, had returned home in 
 the last stage of the disease. This caused almost a 
 general stampede. We had no place to accommo- 
 date our congregation here till our meeting-house 
 was finished. 
 
 We had on our plan "Martinsburg;" and we 
 were a little puzzled, in seeing no society and no 
 official names in connection. I could get but little 
 information in regard to the road, and got out of 
 the way. About two o'clock I entered the town, 
 and inquired of the first man seen, if there were 
 any Methodists living in the place. After consid- 
 erable study, he said there was not one; but, point- 
 ing to a certain house, he said there was an old 
 woman living there who might lean that way. I
 
 320 THE CROSS. 
 
 entered the house, and asked if she knew of any 
 Methodists living in Martinsburg. 
 
 "Laws! no, sir. There were some here once; 
 but they have moved, died, or backslidden. There 
 is not one here now." 
 
 I sat a little while, hoping she would ask me to 
 put up my horse, and take a bite myself; but this 
 she did not think of. After a while she said, 
 
 "I can tell you one thing for your comfort; if 
 you are a Methodist preacher, as I suppose, the 
 people here, generally, love to hear a Methodist 
 minister better than any other." 
 
 "Well, madam, can you tell me of any Method- 
 ists who live within a short distance of this place?" 
 
 "Yes, I have a son who is the leader of a class 
 about three miles off." 
 
 She gave me directions, and I got to her son's in 
 the evening man and horse sufficiently tired and 
 hungry. While we were sitting around the table, 
 there came a messenger, express from town, saying, 
 if the ministers would give them regular preaching, 
 two of the merchants and a cabinet-maker would 
 pledge themselves to keep them and their horses. 
 
 "Then tell them we will begin with them to- 
 morrow evening by early candle-lighting." 
 
 When I went, I found that the Presbyterians 
 were holding a sacramental meeting. I told my 
 friends that I had no knowledge of that, and was 
 ready to postpone. They said this would make no 
 material difference, as we could get a large school-
 
 MOUNT VERNON CIRCUIT. 321 
 
 house crowded with persons who would not be likely 
 to attend the other meeting. We faced a crowded 
 congregation at night, and felt that we had struck 
 the right vein. The work of God revived, gradu- 
 ally, but gloriously; and before we left the circuit, 
 ninety persons, embracing the bone and sinew of 
 the village, embraced religion. The two merchants 
 and the cabinet-maker were converted, and that 
 brightly. At one meeting a couple of brethren 
 went to brother M'Claughlin, and asked him if he 
 would not join the mourners at the altar. He said, 
 "Friends, I would, but can not. I am unstrung in 
 all my limbs." They raised him, and brought him 
 up. At a subsequent meeting he was converted, 
 and went home shouting through the street. The 
 other merchant was a brother-in-law to the Presby- 
 terian minister. His people tried hard to keep him 
 from joining us. He told them he could not in- 
 dorse their doctrine, and expressly referred to its 
 bearing on infants. One of the elders utterly de- 
 nied that it had any such bearing, and he looked to 
 the minister for confirmation; but the preacher was 
 silent. Then the gentleman opened his library, 
 took out a volume, and read the quotation he had 
 made. The elder's look of astonishment showed 
 that his contradiction was entirely innocent. The 
 brother told them he would not be hasty. He 
 wished to examine all the ground before taking an- 
 other step. He went eastward for goods, purchased 
 a Methodist Discipline and some other works, and
 
 THE GROSS. 
 
 read them on his way home, like the Ethiopian, and 
 joined our Church. The brethren built a handsome 
 meeting-house, plastered it in the midst of Winter, 
 keeping their stoves in full blast night and day. 
 
 Before I left them they gave me one of the most 
 costly coats I ever wore, even in the days of my 
 brightest prosperity; and it was made in a finished 
 style by a tailor who was expelled from the Church. 
 Without self-flattery, this was owing to my just 
 manner of administration. I always endeavored to 
 secure to the defendant every facility in his defense, 
 and that even when I had prescience enough to 
 know he would be expelled. In doing this I have 
 had sometimes to try the patience of an indignant 
 committee. They would think certain round-about 
 statements were entirely irrelevant in the defense. 
 I thought so myself, but could always bear with a 
 dying man, and let him have a fair swing. So the 
 expelled seldom abused me. I once had to pro- 
 nounce a brother expelled, and from the excitable 
 disposition of himself and wife, I expected no mercy. 
 Still, God blessed them with an heir in a few weeks, 
 and they named him A. M. L. I always thought 
 it a most solemn thing to cut off a soul from the 
 congregation of the Lord, for if we do it justly, 
 mitid ye, it will be done in heaven. 
 
 There was an appointment a few miles from Mar- 
 tinsburg, up a rocky run. It was one of your old, 
 staid societies, in number truly apostolic. If one 
 member died or removed, another would move in
 
 MOUNT VEENON CIRCUIT. 323 
 
 and make up the round dozen. When I went there, 
 some said, 
 
 "Brother L., we have heard of revivals, and 
 sometimes not far from us, but we have never had 
 one in this society. Can you tell us what to do in 
 order to a revival?" 
 
 "Brethren, do you truly desire a revival, and 
 pray for it?" 
 
 " We always pray for it." 
 
 "Have you ever added fasting to prayer?" 
 
 "No, we never thought of that." 
 
 "Well, try it; but don't try it till you hold a 
 conference on the subject, and get the consent of 
 every member; then appoint a day, leave off all 
 work, come together, and pray for a revival." 
 
 The brethren did so, and the Lord heard on 
 earth, and answered from heaven. They had a 
 precious work. Our appointments were in the 
 evening. The house was crowded, and sometimes 
 the porch and part of the yard, although the 
 weather was disagreeable. The Campbellites in- 
 fested this region, and withstood us greatly. When 
 a member Would come out of the house they would 
 beset him in this way: 
 
 "Why are you always dunning the Lord? Sup- 
 pose you owed me a few dollars, and I should be 
 always dunning you for them, would you not de- 
 spise me? But you dun the Lord in the morning, 
 at noon, and then all night. You must know it is 
 displeasing to him."
 
 324 THE CROSS. 
 
 Methodist "I pray to God because I am needy, 
 and none but him can help me. Do you not pray 
 to God in time of need?" 
 
 Campbellite. "I allow a man may get into a 
 strait, once or twice in his life, when he may pray; 
 but what 's the use of always dunning ?" 
 
 The Campbellites had so incessantly preached im- 
 mersion, as to influence the neighborhood on that 
 point, so our converts all wished to be baptized by 
 immersion. We gave out an appointment to attend 
 to that matter. In the mean time it turned unusu- 
 ally cold, and the run was partially frozen. The 
 class-leader met me on the road, and said, 
 
 "Brother L., will you baptize our new members 
 to-day?" 
 
 "Certainly, if they wish it. Did I not set apart 
 this day to that purpose?" 
 
 "You did; but the Campbellites have been troub- 
 ling our new members, and asking them if they are 
 so simple as to suppose that a Methodist preacher 
 would put his foot into water such weather as this." 
 
 "Let them mind their own business." 
 
 When we marched down to the water, the whole 
 country crowded the banks. I first walked in alone, 
 sounding every depth and shoal with my staff. As 
 I descended into the water and ice, it seemed as if 
 my legs were cut off; but I walked about with a 
 countenance as serene as a basket of chips, stopped 
 and compared places, and splashed the water like a 
 canvas-backed duck. This was no hypocrisy. I felt
 
 MOUNT VERNON CIECUIT. 325 
 
 joyful in the prospect of putting the mark of the 
 covenant on our young converts, by whatever mode. 
 I then took the candidates in one by one, and felt 
 the bottom with every one of them, and the Camp- 
 bellites acknowledged it was done secundum artem. 
 But this was the beginning. As fast as they came 
 in they wished to be immersed. We made only one 
 blunder that was with a large African. Before 
 going in he said he wanted to be baptized like the 
 colored people in old Virginia that was to tie his 
 handkerchief around his head, so as to leave a tail 
 for the preacher to take hold of. I told him I was 
 raised in old Virginia, and had seen that operation 
 often, but he had better let me do my own way, 
 assuring him I had never failed; but he insisted on 
 his own way, and he tied his cotton handkerchief 
 around his head; but the misfortune was he had 
 little or no forehead. His head appeared to be as 
 flat as a turnip. When I undertook to lay him 
 down he threw his head back, and the handkerchief 
 slipped off. There was considerable floundering, but 
 I put him under. He seemed somewhat mortified 
 that his chosen mode did not take. 
 
 William Westlake had a sprinkle of eccentricity. 
 At a distant point of his circuit his host told him a 
 Campbellite was going to preach at night in 'the 
 school-house, and that it was a new occurrence. 
 He asked him if he would not go. Westlake said 
 he believed he would. When they got there, the 
 house was so crowded they barely got inside.
 
 THE CROSS. 
 
 The preacher, in illustrating his system, used 
 much "bargain and trade" figures. He said when 
 men got title-bonds for any thing they felt legally 
 safe, knowing that, at the time and place specified, 
 they would certainly receive the consideration. So 
 it was in salvation. Baptism was God's title-bond 
 of eternal life given to the sinner. All who would 
 receive this would be certain of salvation. This 
 was the backbone of his discourse. When he was 
 done preaching he said if there were any in the con- 
 gregation who had not understood his doctrine 
 new to the most of them he was willing to answer 
 any questions which might be asked. They pro- 
 fessed to be teachers rather than preachers. 
 
 Westlake, " I would not mind asking you a 
 question or two, sir, if I could be simply answered 
 without any controversy." 
 
 Preacher. "Controversy, indeed! We wish to 
 teach in the most simple manner, and are willing to 
 answer all objections in meekness and love." 
 
 Westlake. "If I did not misunderstand you, sir, 
 you hold that immersion is a title-bond to eternal 
 life, and he who is immersed has a right to heaven?" 
 
 Preacher. "Exactly, you understand me right; 
 and pray, what do you think of it?" 
 
 Westlake. " Why, it drummed up curious thoughts 
 in my mind. I thought that if your doctrine is true, 
 there must be many hogs in heaven." 
 
 Preacher. "What do you mean, sir?" 
 
 Westlake. " When our Lord cast a legion of devils
 
 MOUNT VERNON CIRCUIT. 327 
 
 out of one who was possessed, they went into a 
 great herd of swine, and they ran violently down a 
 steep place into the sea and were immersed. They 
 received your title-bond and a legion of devils with 
 them. Good-night, sir." 
 
 The gravest in the congregation could not restrain 
 themselves. 
 
 Preacher. "Stop, sir 0, don't go now see that, 
 he is off. I do hate a man who will not wait for 
 explanations." 
 
 Westlake. (Putting his head into the doorway.) 
 "You proposed, simply, questions and answers, 
 without controversy. Good-night." 
 
 That Campbellite sermon, in that neighborhood, 
 was solus. Six days' controversy could not have 
 effected as much. 
 
 Charles E. Lovell was in his first itinerant year. 
 He was a young man of pleasing appearance, tal- 
 ented, and popular. When I had an interview with 
 him last year, at Conference, and listened to the melt- 
 ing recital of his loss, in the death of his amiable 
 daughter and when I looked up, and saw how 
 care and anxiety had begun to sprinkle his locks 
 and when my mind went back to the day when he, 
 and I might say his bride, for they were lately 
 married, lived together with us, blithe, cheerful, 
 and religiously happy I said, in the depth of my 
 heart, 
 
 " What trials have we seen ! 
 What conflicts have we passed 1"
 
 328 THE CROSS. 
 
 May his last days be his best days, and may he 
 get safely home, bringing his sheaves with him ! 
 Brother Christie was our presiding elder, and his 
 fame spread all through that region and the country 
 round about, drawing great congregations from all 
 parts and all denominations. He always put up 
 with us when he could; and I always blacked his 
 boots not to curry favor, for I never eat post-hay 
 for any man, but because I loved him. When I 
 went to assist him with a big meeting, at his home, 
 he would clean my shoes in spite of all my scuffling. 
 He was determined the sailor should not outdo him 
 in hospitality. I was acquainted with his wife from 
 her girlhood. We may have occasion to speak of 
 Christie again; but, lest it might be forgotten, I 
 will say he was an extraordinary man. He had an 
 uncommon memory. He could read one of Watson's 
 sermons, and get up and preach it much better, as 
 I thought, than the author ever did. He was not 
 given to this, for he had an energy and power in 
 himself sufficient for all cases, elaborate or extem- 
 poraneous. He beat Bigelow on the Canadian ques- 
 tion not only confuting the arguments he had 
 brought, but continued on, in anticipation, to an- 
 swer every one that he might possibly bring, till he 
 left his opponent high and dry at flood-tide; and, 
 like the ass between two stacks of hay, we knew 
 not which to sympathize with.
 
 UNION CIRCUIT. 329 
 
 XXV. 
 
 "' .- . *"( ' ' fW*l$QS^ ''??,' TSOt!*l '-'iii 
 
 UNION AND MADISONVILLE CIRCUITS. 
 
 1835. ON the Union circuit, embracing Xenia, I 
 had with me Alexander Morrow and Stephen Hol- 
 land. Morrow was a very correct speaker, and a 
 good sermonizer, justly esteemed. Holland was 
 above mediocrity, and although not possessing the 
 advantages of a liberal education, this want could 
 seldom be detected by a stranger. He was natu- 
 rally impulsive, and graciously filled with the 
 blessed Spirit, and with power. Affectionate in his 
 intercourse, he could not be otherwise than popular. 
 This was a six- weeks' circuit and we humbly think 
 there can not be an arrangement more unfortunate. 
 The people could hardly get acquainted with their 
 preachers. When the quarterly meeting took a 
 preacher from a certain appointment, that appoint- 
 ment would not have his services for three months. 
 If the preacher should be taken from the same ap- 
 poBtment by every quarterly meeting, then he 
 would not be at that appointment the whole year. 
 But this was not suffered to happen. This arrange- 
 ment gave much trouble to the preacher in charge, 
 
 and he had to do much by delegation to his col- 
 
 28
 
 330 THE CROSS. 
 
 leagues. Nevertheless, we had some good times, 
 and quite a revival at Centerville. 
 
 There had been a general revival the two preced- 
 ing years, under Latta and Laws, and this was 
 necessarily a year of pruning and confirmation. 
 The reader will recollect that I started from Xenia. 
 It was there, while a local preacher, that I had the 
 honor of drawing up the heading of the first mis- 
 sionary subscription that was started in the West 
 and, for aught I know, in the Union that is, in 
 the Methodist Episcopal Church. It was when the 
 Wyandott mission was yet in the hands of the local 
 ministers. Subscriptions had been raised in the 
 congregations; but now the missionary friends be- 
 gan to assume the form of a society every sub- 
 scriber a member. 
 
 "We were very well situated on the Union circuit, 
 surrounded by old, tried friends friends who, when 
 they recommended me to the Conference, told the 
 elder they did not recommend to others one whom 
 they would be unwilling to receive themselves. &u 
 
 But at the last quarterly meeting a circumstance 
 occurred, which led to my voluntary removal. The 
 elder, brother Raper, told me his manner of con- 
 ducting the last quarterly meeting in the year. 
 He said, among other things, he examined the stfrw- 
 ards in regard to the performance of their duties, 
 one by one. I begged he would not do this, as I 
 had never unto that day known it to be done, and 
 as there was no doubt about our getting our quar-
 
 UNION CIRCUIT. 331 
 
 terage, it seemed unnecessary; that our stewards 
 were like the stewards on all other circuits some 
 very faithful, and some who did not concern them- 
 selves with their office at all. But if he inquired 
 about each man, as a Christian I would have to tell 
 the truth, and that, in the very nature of things, 
 would raise a smoke, as it always does. But he 
 held me to it. Some of the stewards I praised 
 highly they were worthy; but of others I had to 
 say that they never came to quarterly conference 
 only when it came to them. They never spoke of 
 financial matters even in their own classes; and 
 they never entered the parsonage to inquire whether 
 we were dead or alive. This raised a warm con- 
 versation, for it was necessarily personal. Some 
 said brother L. should have his quarterage if no 
 other man had. This cut me, as I was one whose 
 standing rule was never to utter a word about the 
 quarterage. I observed that there was no anxiety 
 about that. My motive was altogether moral. The 
 elder had pointedly asked me if such a brother per- 
 formed all the duties of a steward. The brother 
 himself knew that he had not. His colleagues 
 knew that he had riot. His own class knew that 
 he had not. The Lord knew that he had not; and 
 how could I, a professed minister, lie, and say that 
 he had? I had never been asked the question be- 
 fore, and tried to stave it off, and was obliged to 
 answer as I did. After quarterly conference I told 
 the elder he must move me. He thought there was
 
 332 THE CROSS. 
 
 no occasion. He consulted with the brethren, and 
 assured me I was not yet done over. This I be- 
 lieve, for the brethren who were most nettled were 
 afterward remarkably kind. But still I held to my 
 request, and it was granted. 
 
 We might say a great deal in praise of this cir- 
 cuit, but it is unnecessary, because it is so well 
 known by many of our ministers. Xenia always 
 seemed like my home, and while that generation 
 lasted, I never stopped there without being sur- 
 rounded and taken by storm. It was like Auburn 
 "loveliest village of the plain." 
 
 MADISONVILLE. 
 
 1836. We rode this circuit in 1836 and 1837, 
 having traveled it before while connected with the 
 Miami circuit. The first year we labored with 
 brother Cheney, and the second, with brother Par- 
 ish. They were both very pious and pleasant. We 
 had some very encouraging meetings, and the soci- 
 eties were lively. 
 
 1856. As it is my design to keep every appoint- 
 ment under one heading, I will add that I rode the 
 circuit again in 1856 and 1857. So I labored five 
 years on this charge, and from time to time re- 
 newed my acquaintance with members that I had 
 taken in long time ago. Having endured thus 
 far, we hope they will continue till eternal life. I 
 feel thankful to the brethren there that they bore 
 so long with me, and especially for the kind recep-
 
 MADISONVILLE. 333 
 
 tion they gave me on my last coming. The parson- 
 age being already occupied by my colleague, brother 
 Glasscock, who labored on the circuit the previous 
 year, I settled in Columbia, a beautiful village on 
 the bank of the Ohio. 
 
 On my second year we had an extraordinary wet 
 season in the Fall, and mud in abundance. On one 
 of the most dreary and showery evenings of that 
 season, about nightfall, the parsonage was stormed 
 at all available points by horse and foot, ladies and 
 gentlemen, who poured down upon us a profusion 
 of the necessaries and comforts of this life. Colonel 
 Holmes, on the part of the company, made a humor- 
 ous but chaste speech, observing that he hoped the 
 visit would be more grateful to me, when he assured 
 me that it was not on account of any murmuring 
 or complaining on the part of the preacher or his 
 family, for no such thing had been heard. Neither 
 was it because they had heard of any pressing want, 
 but it was simply as an expression of their good 
 feeling toward us. We might also see that it was 
 not simply a Church matter, but the citizens gen- 
 erally had joined in the visitation, and if the night 
 had been clear, the yard, instead of the house, would 
 have been full, and he had heard no one in or out 
 of the Church object. This is only an outline of his 
 speech, and before he was done I was pretty much 
 used up. I have been accustomed to make speeches 
 in and out of the pulpit, and if any one should 
 rouse my anger, I suppose I could talk some; but
 
 334 THE CROSS. 
 
 when one knocks out the bung of gratitude I'm 
 "done over." I made some kind of reply, but it 
 was very unworthy of the occasion. The doctor 
 presented Mrs. Lorrain with some coffee, under the 
 notion of a specific medicine, and began to give a 
 verbal recipe, if we might so speak, and directions 
 how to mix and prepare it. I saw this gave her 
 considerable diversion, and I said, "Doctor, you 
 need not be very precise, she can mix that medi- 
 cine better than any one in this community. 
 She is famous in that decoction throughout the 
 Conference." 
 
 I can not express my affection for the brethren 
 of this circuit, with many of whom I have taken 
 sweet counsel for so many years. The principal 
 strength of the Church in Columbia was the female 
 members. They were well qualified by gifts and 
 grace, and although duly modest in all social rela- 
 tions, yet they were 
 
 "Bold to take up, firm to sustain 
 The consecrated cross." 
 
 Brother Murphy rode with me during the last 
 year on this circuit. It pleased Grod to take away 
 the wife of his youth in the midst of the year. I 
 preached the funeral sermon, and must say that I 
 have seldom seen a congregation sympathize so 
 deeply with the bereaved. She was an extraordi- 
 nary good woman, and was fully prepared for her 
 great change. She lies in the same graveyard with
 
 MADISONVILLE. 
 
 my own mother, who died in the same parsonage 
 in 1837. 
 
 In this circuit live some of our most choice mem- 
 bers: Langdon, of Columbia, Green, of Carthage, 
 Buckingham, of Miamisville, and ; but here I must 
 stop, or give a list of worthies who live there and 
 will liv.e forever. Ever since we have had charge 
 of societies we have held firmly to the ministerial 
 right to receive into the Church on trial such as 
 give evidence of true contrition. We have held to 
 this key with an unconquerable grip. We have 
 sometimes met with opposition from the officiary on 
 this point. An instance of this kind occurred, 
 during one of our terms on this circuit. There ap- 
 peared in our community a strange female who 
 earned a bare support by washing. It was reported 
 that she had been seen intoxicated several times by 
 the wayside. Several temperance lecturers came 
 out of Cincinnati, and held a series of meetings in 
 quick succession. This woman came up, among 
 others, and took the pledge. She then began to 
 attend our religious meetings, and during a refresh- 
 ing season sought and obtained religion. She ap- 
 plied for admission into the Church. The difficulty 
 was, there was not a leader that would have her 
 name on his paper. I went privately to a young 
 leader, and told him if he would let me put her 
 name on the bottom of his class-book, I would 
 pledge myself to take it off whenever she violated 
 the rules. To this he agreed, supposing he would
 
 336 THE CROSS. 
 
 not be burdened with it long. She had heard the 
 Church was unwilling to receive her, and the first 
 time she attended class she meekly observed that 
 she was not surprised or hurt by the Church being 
 unwilling to receive her. She felt deeply that she 
 was unworthy, but if they would only suffer her to 
 come inside the door, where she could hear them 
 sing, pray, and talk of the Savior, it was all she 
 craved. 
 
 From that day she was an example of piety, 
 attending all her meetings, through all weathers, 
 and she gradually drew on the respect of all, inside 
 and outside the Church. After she had fully estab- 
 lished her character as a humble Christian, she 
 came down one day to the parsonage, with a bright 
 countenance, and gave me a full account of her 
 case, from which I gathered the following: She was 
 brought up in Kentucky, and was a happy member 
 of a pious, happy family. There was regular 
 preaching in her father's house; but when her 
 mother died her father married a woman who scat- 
 tered the family like a tigress. She came to Ohio in 
 order to get a living if possible ; but exiled from all 
 she loved, she felt lonely and abandoned. In that 
 condition she had indulged in spirits, but the tem- 
 perance lectures had fully opened her eyes to the 
 unfathomable gulf to which she was tending; and 
 having learned in her father's house where there 
 was rest for her soul, she sought and found salva- 
 tion. She then informed me she had just received
 
 MADISONVILLE. 337 
 
 a letter from her father, to whom she had written 
 after she was converted, and he informed her that 
 her step-mother was dead, all his children were 
 gone, he was old and infirm, and that she must 
 return and take care of him in his old age, and his 
 property should be hers when he died. She felt it 
 was her duty to go, but thought, as she had been a 
 stranger among us, it would be best to leave these 
 particulars with the preacher. We gave her a letter, 
 and was happy to hear, some time after, that she 
 was with her father, and growing in grace and the 
 knowledge of the Lord. Now, if I had taken the 
 advice of the officiary, had rejected this penitent, 
 and driven her back to perdition, what board of 
 leaders could have answered for the violation of my 
 commission? When any have had a trial, and 
 proved delinquent, then it is time to consult with 
 others about laying them aside. Some think it is 
 scandalous for the Church to try to save one whose 
 former life has been shameful. We think it is the 
 proper work of the Church below, and we believe 
 the Church triumphant will embrace in her happy 
 belt too many reformed prodigals, to blush at her 
 past mercy. "But the world! but the world!" 
 Well, to many of these it may still be said, the 
 publicans and harlots enter into the kingdom of 
 heaven before you. The children of this world 
 would do well to "keep their breath to cool their 
 own porridge." 
 
 We are aware that as a Church declines in apos- 
 29
 
 THE CROSS. 
 
 tolic grace, she will gradually be driven from apos- 
 tolic practice. No Church ever went down with a 
 surge. We will make no noise against lay delega- 
 tion, but when it comes we do hope that the preach- 
 ers will fence in, stronger than ever, what is purely 
 ministerial right. 
 
 We had, while under the superintendence of 
 brother Christie, the most singular meeting we ever 
 saw or heard of before or since. It was in Bates's 
 settlement. The meeting-house on Saturday night 
 was crowded. Brother Parish had sung and prayed, 
 and was just about to read his text, when a simul- 
 taneous shout from nearly all the Church men, 
 women, and children broke loose like a tornado, and 
 continued for nearly two hours by the elder's watch. 
 It was deafening. Some eight or ten sinners came 
 tumbling over the benches and fell at the altar cry- 
 ing for mercy; but several fled out of the house 
 and cursed like privateersmen, declaring it was a 
 concerted scheme of the Methodists to scare them. 
 There might be a division of this question. It was 
 no concerted plan; but that they were badly scared 
 there can be no doubt. In the midst of this human 
 storm the elder requested brother Parish, who had 
 a powerful voice, to slip down into the altar and try 
 to exhort them. This he attempted, but although 
 we were leaning over him, it was only now and then 
 that we could understand a word. He soon sunk 
 exhausted. As soon as the shouting subsided in a 
 measure we opened the door of the Church and
 
 MADISONVILLE. 
 
 received a number. Some thought this would be 
 followed by a general revival; but the whole Ohio 
 Conference would not have raised such another 
 shout, for it was a Church remarkably orderly.
 
 340 THE CROSS. 
 
 XXVI. 
 WEST UNION CIRCUIT. 
 
 1838. THIS circuit was a part of the old Brush 
 Creek circuit, and as such was an old acquaintance. 
 Brother J. W. Weakley was my appointed colleague. 
 He had preached but one sermon before he came 
 on, but he improved rapidly. There was evidently 
 a good feeling getting up in Eipley, and we built 
 much hope on our first quarterly meeting. Brother 
 Christie came on in bad health, so that he had to 
 preach sitting in a chair. We made several efforts 
 to get mourners to the altar, but not one would 
 come forward. It at last struck us to invite sin- 
 ners to join the Church. In a few moments the 
 altar was surrounded. At every succeeding meet- 
 ing we would try to prevail on them to come to the 
 mourners' bench; but all in vain. As soon as we 
 would open the door of the Church they would come 
 in. We went on working in this way till we had 
 received several scores. Although I had always 
 believed in convicted persons joining the Church, I 
 was a little alarmed at seeing so many unconverted 
 members coming in at one time. But as soon as 
 we began to hold social prayer meetings around 
 town, persons began to obtain forgiveness, and we
 
 WEST UNION CIRCUIT. 341 
 
 received something over one hundred and fifty. 
 We were considerably opposed in a private way. 
 One minister, even, went into Methodist families, 
 and tried to proselyte. A lady belonging to our 
 Church said, 
 
 "Sir, why take so much pains to turn a person 
 from one Church to another seeing, if we get to 
 heaven, there will be no Methodists, no Presby- 
 terians?" 
 
 "Indeed, madam, you are mistaken. There will 
 be Presbyterians there and we can prove it." 
 
 "I would like to know how." 
 
 "Saint John, in the Isle of Patmos, had a clear 
 view of heaven, and he saw four-and-twenty elders 
 around the Throne. Now you know the Presbyte- 
 rian Church has elders." 
 
 "Bless my soul! and has not the Methodist 
 Church got a plenty of elders and presiding elders, 
 in the bargain?" 
 
 The same minister seemed to be exceedingly un- 
 easy at the continuance of the meeting; and, while 
 we were preaching to crowded houses, he sent a 
 note to be read, that there would be a meeting of 
 the Temperance Society, at the other church, on the 
 next night. This society had been lately organized, 
 and the Methodists had taken great interest in it. 
 
 When I received this notice in the pulpit, I 
 handed it to the brother who was going to preach, 
 and requested him to read it distinctly, before he 
 took his text. While he was preaching, I remem-
 
 342 THE CROSS. 
 
 bered that some of brother William Armstrong's 
 children had requested me to preach a sailor ser- 
 mon; and then I thought, "Be ye wise as serpents." 
 Perhaps the minister who sent the notice had been 
 digesting the same command. When brother Gad- 
 dis, who was on a visit, had finished preaching to 
 the children, he caught several young folks. This 
 gave occasion to some, next day, to say, "The 
 Methodists are 'most done, they caught nothing 
 last night but minnows." Before the meeting 
 closed, we arose and observed, that some of the 
 young people had requested me to preach a sea ser- 
 mon. I concluded that I would, as in the morning 
 of my life I had followed the seas, and it was pleas- 
 ant for me to take a cruise now and then. I then 
 opened the Bible and read, as my text for the next 
 evening, "They that go down to the seas in ships, 
 and do business in the great deep," etc. The next 
 day, one would say to another, 
 
 "Where will you go, to-night?" 
 
 "0, I will go to hear about those who go down 
 into the seas." 
 
 At night our house was crowded, and the secre- 
 tary of the Temperance Society was there. Our 
 people were not indifferent about temperance; but 
 they did not like it as a cloak for bigotry; and 
 they knew, moreover, that the Temperance Society 
 was always with them, but times of refreshing were 
 transient. 
 
 We called up the mourners, after preaching, and
 
 WEST UNION CIECUIT. 343 
 
 had an amazing haul. It seemed to me that some 
 of the tallest and most bare-boned folks in the town 
 rushed forward. One Methodist rose up on a bench, 
 and, turning to the congregation, said, "See here! 
 Are these minnows ? No. We love minnows. But, 
 look here : monsters ! whales ! sea-serpents ! Glory 
 be to God!" And the work still went. on. 
 
 The next thrust at me was infamous. A country 
 minister told a large congregation, on a Sabbath, 
 that the preacher in charge of West Union circuit, 
 hearing that the trustees of the meeting-house in 
 Decatur had given leave to an abolition lecturer to 
 use the house, had violently taken the key and put 
 it in his pocket, declaring that the preachers had a 
 sovereign right to all the churches. When told of 
 this announcement, and that the story was going 
 the rounds, I had never heard that any one had 
 applied to the trustees for the house. When we in- 
 quired of the trustees, they said that they had prom- 
 ised a gentleman the use of the house; but that a 
 report had gone abroad, that the friends of the lec- 
 turer intended to carry private arms, and this re- 
 port, whether true or false, had exasperated a certain 
 class, and they were determined to attend under 
 similar circumstances. So, fearing the meeting- 
 house would become a place of slaughter, they had 
 stopped the proceedings. The trustees could be 
 qualified that this was done in my absence, and, as 
 far as they knew, I was innocent of the whole mat- 
 ter. The town preacher made a great blow about
 
 344' THE CROSS. 
 
 this matter, and I authorized a friend to give him 
 the right version. He said, "Then, why does not 
 Mr. L. appoint a time, and fully explain himself on 
 this matter, from the pulpit, and define his posi- 
 tion?" I knew he would rather hear this than the 
 Gospel, particularly if it would get us all by the 
 ears, and stop our revival. 
 
 But I requested the friend in answer to this to 
 say, that I regarded the pulpit sacred to the Gospel, 
 and the Lord had called me to preach not myself, 
 but Christ Jesus the Lord, and myself his servant 
 for Jesus' sake. And as the Lord and myself knew 
 that the report was false, they were welcome to 
 handle it as much as they pleased, provided they 
 would do themselves no harm. Still the work of God 
 went on. I felt it to be my duty, in the light of the 
 golden rule, to visit the minister who was circula- 
 ting this whole-cloth slander through the country. 
 A member of brother Meek's family was present on 
 one occasion when he entertained his congregation 
 with the interesting narrative. Still I charitably 
 hoped that he had been imposed on, and that he 
 would like to be disabused, if it was false. He had 
 invited me some time before to visit him, in virtue 
 of our former acquaintance when I was traveling 
 Brush Creek. So I went to see him, but not with- 
 out much prayer. He invited me into his study, 
 and I soon opened my business by telling him that 
 I had understood that he had used my name in 
 connection with the trustees of Decatur meeting-
 
 WEST UNION CIECUIT. 345 
 
 house, and whatever might have been the source of 
 his information, the story he had told was without 
 any foundation. I had never heard it till it came 
 to me from his pulpit. He promptly denied the 
 whole matter. I then asked him if brother Meek 
 did not stop him as he passed his house, coming 
 from that meeting, and advise him not to repeat 
 the story, as he knew that brother L. was too well 
 acquainted with the Discipline to assume such 
 authority over the trustees; and although he had 
 not mentioned it to him as yet, he knew that such 
 a procedure was entirely contrary to his whole 
 character. At the mention of Meek's name he be- 
 gan a eulogy on him, and allowed if he said so, 
 there must have been something of it. Then his 
 face grew red, and he said, 
 
 "If you did not do that, you have done worse, 
 sir, and I have no apology to make." 
 
 "Well, what have I done worse? If I have 
 stolen or murdered let me answer to my crimes; 
 but clear me of what I have not done." 
 
 "You have oppressed the African. You have no 
 mercy for him. You rivet his chains. You take 
 away his Bible. You are the man who roused up 
 the citizens to pelt me with rotten eggs, as I passed 
 through the other day. You are the man who slips 
 threatening letters under my door, saying you will 
 burn up me and my house if I do not renounce my 
 principles, or if I do not lodge money in certain 
 places, and "
 
 346 THE CROSS. 
 
 "Stop, stop, sir. I am the man who would re- 
 joice if every slave in the nation had a Bible and 
 could read it, obey it, and get to heaven. This is 
 the first intelligence I have had of your being 
 egged in passing through Decatur. I should have 
 certainly heard of such a remarkable circumstance 
 if it had happened. And take care how you talk 
 of me and secret missives." 
 
 Then he flew into a fury, and cried in a loud but 
 tremulous voice, stamping his feet, at every repe- 
 tition, "Begone! begone! begone! Leave me! leave 
 me!" I coolly retired toward the door of the room. 
 He waddled round the table, following me through 
 the passage with "Begone! leave my house." I 
 still kept my eye a little quartering, expecting a 
 poop. What I would have done if he had kicked 
 me, the Lord knows; but I reached the street in 
 safety, and he slammed the door with a noise that 
 resounded through the whole castle. It was some- 
 thing singular that although till this time I had all 
 the tranquillity that I had prayed for, yet I had 
 not walked fifty yards before I felt my fists coiling 
 up, and my feet in stays, and something seemed to 
 say, why did you not knock the lubber over? You 
 could have slapped him to the floor. Then I found 
 that prayer after meat was necessary as well as be- 
 fore. When I told my adventure to some of our 
 leading men, they wondered that I went to see him 
 at all. They said he had some sense on ordinary 
 subjects, but we have found him perfectly insane
 
 WEST UNION CIECUIT. 347 
 
 on his favorite theme. One of our stewards, a 
 plain, serious man, told me lie had carried a cow- 
 hide under his skirts during a whole day to give 
 him a thrashing wherever he might find him; but 
 when he got a little cool, he said, "Why should I 
 whip a crazy man?" His conduct to me was unac- 
 countable, as I had never interfered with his 
 "Jinny Quockisan" while on the circuit. The 
 secret "letters" I understood were written by one 
 of his own household for fun a kind of "Monsieur 
 Tonson" affair. One day a genteel-looking negro 
 approached some of us, craving help to purchase his 
 wife. He had letters from well-known citizens of 
 Maysville, and we judged from his documents and 
 his honest carriage that he was worthy. We 
 pointed to the stately mansion of our zealous minis- 
 ter, and advised him to apply there, for the owner 
 was a great friend of the African. 
 
 "0, massa, he too conscientious!" 
 
 "What do you mean?" 
 
 "Why, I done gone to see him." 
 
 "What did he say?" 
 
 "Why, he argufy that if he give me a dime to 
 buy my wife, den, y'see, he trade in human flesh 
 and blood, and dat is de thing he preaches against 
 he conscience entirely too tender, massa." 
 
 Years upon years rolled away, even unto green 
 old age, when being stationed in a town on the 
 Ohio, as I was about to cross the muddy street on 
 a narrow gangway, there appeared at the opposite
 
 348 THE CROSS. 
 
 end a stately, venerable gentleman, coming from the 
 other side. There had been a report for several 
 days that the President was coming down the river 
 on a Western tour, and as the gentleman approach- 
 ing was not of our river-eel type, I said to myself, 
 "Surely, here he is as large as life;" and I stepped 
 aside in the mud, as in duty bound rendering unto 
 Caesar the things that are Caesar's. And I was de- 
 termined to take a good look, as it was my only 
 chance. As he came up, he rolled his large eyes 
 on me, committed a smile, and said, 
 
 "Surely, this is my old friend, L. My name 
 is B." 
 
 So it was, and we entered into a pleasant conver- 
 sation; but in the most interesting part, conscience 
 stirred up in her lair, and he said, 
 
 " Look here, L. ! did n't we once have some kind 
 of a stir round he it seems almost like a dream; 
 but I came across a humorous piece in the Advo- 
 cate, written by you, and it so pleased me that I 
 forgave all so we 11 let old matters pass." 
 
 Amen! Pass on, brother B.; may we meet in 
 heaven ! 
 
 The Methodists got up a school in Indiana, and 
 solicited my colleague to take charge of it. To this 
 I was opposed. I believed it would be better for 
 him and the Church for him to continue in the itin- 
 erancy. I believe he thought so too; but by the 
 force of circumstances he was taken away. I know 
 that he has since filled his vocation with honor and
 
 WEST UNION CIKCTTIT. 349 
 
 credit; but what is it to what he might have 
 done? 
 
 Brother Oliver Williams was put in his place. 
 He was one of the most innocent and devoted young 
 ministers of that day. He rode a few years in the 
 work when alarming symptoms of derangement 
 began to appear. His friends hoping that by a 
 scientific treatment of the disease by physicians 
 practiced in such complaints, he might be restored, 
 carried him to Columbus. But vain was the help 
 of man. The Lord took him to his people's rest. 
 Some think it strange that a child of God should 
 be suffered to lose his reason. But when we reflect 
 that insanity comes by natural or accidental causes 
 that are common to all men, so that the Lord, in 
 preventing it in special cases, would have to exercise 
 miraculous power; and when we consider, moreover, 
 that he has pledged himself to his people to save 
 them in their afflictions, and not to preserve them 
 from the natural ills of this life; that although he 
 may suffer them to pass through the waters, the 
 waves shall not overwhelm them, or to pass through 
 the fire, the flame shall not destroy them, we may 
 well have hope for the pious amid all the ravings 
 of insanity. 
 
 In almost all cases where Christians have been 
 demented and subsequently restored, they awake as 
 out of an unconscious state. I read a beautiful 
 illustration of this: A young man became serious, 
 and was diligently seeking religion. He suddenly
 
 350 THE CROSS. 
 
 lost his reason. His pious parents were deeply 
 afflicted, and especially afflicted because they had no 
 evidence of his justification before this misfortune. 
 The doctor, however, told them he thought it was a 
 case arising out of malconformation of the cranium, 
 which caused a pressure on the brain; and if this 
 was the case he might be restored at the period of 
 life when the fullness of youth began to decline. 
 The parents anxiously watched him for years, and 
 when the period that the physician spoke of arrived, 
 he gradually recovered his senses. It was noticed 
 that he was of a new disposition, full of meekness 
 and love to God and all mankind. When he suffi- 
 ciently recovered his recollection he stated that the 
 last thing which he knew before the unconscious 
 parenthesis through which he 'had passed was, that 
 while struggling for mercy he was powerfully 
 blessed overwhelmed and knew no more. How 
 strangely did the Lord preserve him! Christ has 
 said, "My grace is sufficient." Sufficient for what? 
 For the most stupendous ills that sin has made. 
 We never had any uneasy thoughts about the 
 eternal state of our beloved brother Oliver. View- 
 ing the subject in the above light, we have a most 
 potent argument why every man should make his 
 peace with God, lest that awful day of darkness 
 should suddenly overtake him in his sins. 
 
 This was the only appointment, as far as I know, 
 that the devil or any of his agents procured for me. 
 In saying this we do not call in question the purity
 
 WEST UNION CIRCUIT. 351 
 
 of the bishops or my presiding elder. They made 
 the appointment in good faith, and, as we learned, 
 under the impression of a request; and I paid for 
 it in current money. Neither do we cast any re- 
 flection on the circuit. We were old friends, but I 
 objected to the fraud that an outsider played. We 
 mention the circumstance for the consideration of 
 young preachers. In the morning of my ministry I 
 received my appointments with both hands, as 
 though sliding right down from heaven. In later 
 years I allowed some appointments were only by the 
 permissive will of Heaven, and some through the 
 secret treachery of wicked men. Still, the Lord 
 will cause all things to work together for good to 
 those who are the called according to his purpose. 
 This year we received more than two hundred 
 members, according to our account; and after 
 assorting the fish for twelve months, and mending 
 the old net % the Minutes gave us an increase of one 
 hundred and fifteen. The devil sent John to the 
 Isle of Patmos, where it was supposed he could do 
 nothing; but in that dreary solitude he exposed his 
 whole programme through succeeding ages down to 
 the bottomless pit. So let us go to all our appoint- 
 ments, come whence they may; we are not ac- 
 countable for the making of them. Still, long-suf- 
 fering itself has its periods and stops, and lest the 
 devil should take an advantage of me, I determined 
 not to return. So at the last quarterly meeting I 
 raised a breeze among the trustees of the parsonage.
 
 352 THE CKOSS. 
 
 I showed Christie and the conference that they held 
 a little log-house, with one room and a garret, which 
 they called a parsonage in order to meet the letter 
 of the Discipline. If the preacher said it was a 
 miserable shanty, they said " no, it is our parsonage, 
 and if you are too proud to go into it, you can 
 rent, at your own expense, as the Discipline directs." 
 A warm debate followed, which resulted in some of 
 them acknowledging that it was a piece of barba- 
 rism that they were ashamed of; and my successors 
 got a place "where to lay their heads."
 
 FKANKLINTON CIRCUIT. 353 
 
 XXVII. 
 
 FRANKLINTON AND CIRCLEVILLE 
 CIRCUITS. 
 
 1839. THIS circuit was somewhat diverse from 
 any that I had traveled, both in its geographical 
 and social characters. It embraced a wide range 
 of barrens, and was eminently suited for cattle. 
 We would often ride along a fence two or three 
 miles in extent, and some of the graziers possessed 
 several thousand acres of land in a body. This 
 made the country extremely inconvenient for schools 
 and churches. A stranger would judge the land to 
 be poor, from the scrubby character of the oaks. 
 But this, it is said, has been produced by the an- 
 nual fires which swept over these plains before the 
 settlement. The land is good. We had no revival 
 on this appointment; and we doubt whether there 
 has ever been one of much note. The materials 
 are rather obdurate. One part the wealthy gra- 
 ziers are genteel, polite, and generous; they will 
 give largely for building meeting-houses, and sup- 
 porting the preachers; they will attend meetings 
 regularly, and behave with as much decorum in the 
 house of God as members of the Church and the 
 
 preacher thinks he will get them before the year is 
 30
 
 354 THE CROSS. 
 
 up. But he is mistaken. He will get some nice 
 hams, butter, flour, coffee, and sometimes money 
 as much as five dollars at the time as presents; 
 but their souls are their own, and they are con- 
 firmed infidels. I attended a wedding one evening, 
 at one of their houses. The old gentleman invited 
 me into his private room, and conversed freely with 
 me about the affairs of the Church. About supper- 
 time there was a considerable buzz among the large 
 company of young folks below ; but when the patri- 
 arch made his appearance they were all as still as 
 mice. And, later in the evening, when much hilar- 
 ity prevailed in the hall, when the old man ap- 
 peared, and gave the signal for prayer, all was still. 
 Every one rose and joined in singing, and every 
 one kneeled in prayer. When we retired again, I 
 looked at the gentleman. His external appearance 
 was so venerable the order of his household so 
 correct I began to think that he might be a 
 Christian, or that he might be partially sanctified 
 by his Methodist wife; but he broke my reverie by 
 saying : 
 
 "Mr. L., why does your Church make such 
 efforts to send missionary preachers to the In- 
 dians?" 
 
 "To Christianize them, sir." 
 
 "But there is no necessity for this. I was in this 
 country in Indian times, and I assure you that 
 their morals are superior even to ours. They 
 are men of truth. I could depend on their verbal
 
 FEANKLINTON CIRCUIT. 355 
 
 promise with more confidence than I can on the 
 bond of a white man; and I think their religion is 
 of a superior order." 
 
 I directed him to certain passages of the Bible 
 but I found that he did not believe in the Bible, 
 and that he was an immovable infidel. 
 
 These rich graziers are called, by way of distinc- 
 tion, "Short- Horns" The gentleman to whom I 
 refer, would attend our meeting, like others of his 
 class, and would not venture to breathe any doubt 
 of Christianity before his hands or tenants. What- 
 ever they may think of Christianity, they admit 
 that the preaching of it is calculated to keep the 
 lower class in bounds. The Short-Horns fare, like 
 the rich man, sumptuously every day for they say 
 they know not when company may come upon 
 them. They are very hospitable; but it is consid- 
 ered a miracle of miracles for one of them to get 
 converted. Some of their children, however, joined 
 us. The next class, the tenants, generally have no 
 fear of God before their eyes, and very few of them 
 are ever found at meeting. The tradesmen, and 
 owners of agricultural farms, are, many of them, in 
 the Church, and accessible to the Gospel; but all 
 are a scattered people, and it is with difficulty they 
 can attend church in bad weather.- 
 
 The population is very light-spirited, and even 
 the girls are given to horse-racing, fox-hunting, and 
 daring horsemanship, leaping fences, and swimming 
 creeks and rivers. It is true, the Methodist girls
 
 356 THE CROSS. 
 
 are easily distinguished from the mass, having sac- 
 rificed these pleasures; but when they come to the 
 quarterly meetings, you may see, by the way they 
 hold their loaded horsewhips, and give them an oc- 
 casional smack, as they pass along, that they have 
 known something of the turf. They are Christians, 
 but very blithe and buoyant Christians. 
 
 The best appointment on this circuit was on the 
 Scioto, above Franklinton, on the very ground 
 where we had that revival on the Columbus cir- 
 cuit, where Arianism once prevailed. The most of 
 the members with whom we had met, in the begin- 
 ning of our ministry, had passed into their rest. 
 A number of members from the East had settled 
 in that region, and built up a large and respectable 
 meeting-house. They were intelligent and liberal. 
 Some paid from five to ten dollars, annually, to the 
 Missionary Society, but their peculiar strength in 
 supporting the Gospel was in every one giving 
 something. The last time I preached to them, they 
 presented me a very generous bonus. Perhaps we 
 may never meet them again in this world. May 
 we all meet in heaven! 
 
 My colleague was Jeremiah Hill, a young man 
 of very promising talents, both as a preacher and a 
 writer. We had a remarkably-pleasant time in 
 working together. At one of our quarterly meet- 
 ings brother Jacob Young, in preaching on "Come, 
 let us go up to the house of the Lord, to the house 
 of the God of Jacob," became quite fanciful in
 
 FEANKLINTON CIRCUIT. 357 
 
 explaining by faith the missionary fields of futurity. 
 Yes, he saw, in his imagination, Alfred M. Lorrain 
 in Arabia, walking among the tents of the Arabi- 
 ans, with his Bible in one hand and his hymn-book 
 in the other, saying, "Come, let us go up to the 
 house of the Lord." Then he 'saw Jeremiah Hill 
 in Africa, among the krawls of the Hottentots, say- 
 ing, "Come, let us go up to the house of the Lord." 
 I looked at Jeremiah and saw his face unusually 
 red, and I found out that, although an ultra aboli- 
 tionist, he did not like at all to be stationed among 
 the Hottentots. But the elder rose higher and 
 higher at the thought, and the congregation looked 
 as though on the verge of the millennium. This 
 pious, gifted colleague of mine soon passed away to 
 brighter worlds on high. I never knew age with 
 grace to do so much for any man as they did for 
 our highly-esteemed elder, Jacob Young. He was 
 my elder when I started, and he was in the prime 
 of life. Then he was a doctrinal, argumentative, 
 and instructive minister, but as dry as a chip. In 
 his latter days his ministrations were melodiously 
 melting, and full of grace and love. I am glad he 
 lived so long. Still he was sometimes a little short. 
 While he was a widower he often stopped with us, 
 and was a great favorite in the family. On one 
 occasion several of the members called to see him, 
 and he was giving his opinion on a favorite subject. 
 After a while he made a long pause, and thinking 
 he had ended his "say," I began to take up the
 
 358 THE CROSS. 
 
 parable. He turned round, and said, "Brother L., 
 just hush stop talking is it come to this, that 
 old folks can not talk without being interrupted by 
 the young?" As this was before some of my par- 
 ishioners, I felt a blush flash over my face, and 
 gave a very polite apology, stating that I supposed 
 he had ceased speaking. I saw that his hasty 
 remark troubled him. As he rode home he went 
 several miles to see my colleague. When brother 
 Hill saw me again, he said, "What did you do to 
 our elder when he was last with you, that you are 
 placed up so high in his estimation? He came 
 several miles to see me, and staid only a little 
 while, but all his talk was a eulogy on A. M. L., 
 and he finally concluded you were the greatest 
 gentleman in the Ohio Conference." I told him the 
 good brother had hastily insulted me, and I sup- 
 pose he thought it would be too much to make 
 amends in person, and had taken that opportunity 
 to do it by proxy. He grew more and more de- 
 voted to his favorite calling, and has gone up on 
 high, like a ripe ear, to swell the garner of his 
 
 Lord. 0, may I be a partaker of that bliss ! 
 
 %. ' - f 
 
 CIRCLEVILLE CIRCUIT. 
 
 1840-1. On this circuit I was in connection with 
 brother T. A. Gr. Phillips. Although each of us 
 had our own share in the variety that marks the 
 Methodist ministry, yet we were happily yoked to- 
 gether. Soon after we commenced our labors a
 
 CIRCLEVILLE CIRCUIT. 
 
 Divine influence seemed to pervade the circuit; and 
 although we sent messengers to crave help of each 
 other, yet we both had our hands full. We, how- 
 ever, sometimes got together. My colleague had 
 been carrying on a good work in Kingston when 
 I came to his assistance. One night, supposing the 
 times favorable, I hoisted all sail and took a cruise. 
 Our meeting-house doors were each side of the pul- 
 pit, and what some called the devil's half acre was 
 abaft the congregation. As we began to make 
 land under cheering circumstances, I exhorted the 
 mourners to come on while I was yet preaching, 
 and began to portray the awful shipwreck of the 
 soul on the iron-bound shores of eternal damnation ; 
 and in the midst of the bursting of timber, the crash 
 of masts, the thunder of parting bolts and sweeping 
 breakers, the sinners made almost a general rush 
 toward us. One stream down each aisle shot 
 through the door, like thunder, and the other 
 stream dropped around the altar, and cried for 
 mercy. My colleague braced right up to the wind, 
 till he saw what was the nature of the" coming 
 hosts, and then he sprang into the altar, opening 
 an awful broadside that seemed to make the moral 
 atmosphere shake. In going round he saw a wick- 
 ed tavern-keeper down on his beam ends, and he 
 cried out, "Salvation! here's the devil's own major- 
 general down on his bends!" We made a great 
 haul before we were done. One thing is worthy of 
 remark: this work was in the midst of the most
 
 360 THE CROSS. 
 
 exciting political canvass we ever had ; and although 
 we both avoided the stump, through grace, yet 
 every man, who came through, came out on the 
 right political side. The two parties, which then 
 were, are dissolved, and it might be no offense to 
 say which was the right side; but lest we might 
 turn up some latent spark, we simply say the right 
 side; and if you, reader, were on the right side, 
 then they came out on your side. A wicked poli- 
 tician, hearing this, said, he would to God all 
 the world would get converted. 
 
 But whether we worked together or singly, the 
 Word of the Lord had free course. A society at 
 one end of the circuit requested me to give them 
 preaching for one week. I began Monday night, and 
 continued through the next Sunday without any min- 
 isterial help, excepting one sermon on the Sabbath. 
 We took in about fifty members. There was one sin- 
 gular circumstance connected with this; I did not 
 preach at all to my own satisfaction, and sometimes 
 found it hard work. When I looked at the effects I 
 was astonished. I was astonished at the work in con- 
 nection with the paucity of the means. While on this 
 subject I will add, that on a certain occasion I was 
 traveling to Cincinnati in company with a preacher ; 
 we concluded to stop at a camp meeting on the 
 road, and feed. While there they put me up to 
 preach. I felt greatly in the brush, and thought 
 my sermon entirely out of place. It was on sancti- 
 fication. About fifteen years after, I fell in com-
 
 . CIRCLEVILLE CIECUIT. 361 
 
 pany with a brother who asked if I was not at that 
 camp meeting, and if' I did not preach on such a 
 text. I told him I did, but thought it was poor 
 preaching. "Well," added he, "I wanted to tell 
 you that that sermon was salvation to me." An- 
 other singularity to offset this is, I have sometimes 
 preached when there was no sign of external good, 
 when my own soul was overwhelmed with the sub- 
 ject; when it has appeared to me as if grace and 
 peace have flowed out in a circle and returned into 
 my own bosom, in good measure, pressed down and 
 running over. Almost four hundred souls on this 
 circuit professed religion that year. Numbers of 
 them belonged to the Church, as seekers, for years, 
 but this revival brought them through. I continued 
 on the circuit another year, and our societies were 
 blessed and edified. On the last year I had two 
 very severe spells of. sickness, and it was reported 
 in some places that I had died. Dr. Brown waited 
 on me with all the tender solicitude of a brother, 
 and when I called upon him for my bill, which I 
 expected would be heavy, and justly so in view of 
 his untiring services, he smiled, and said, "Nothing 
 at all." Some of our leading members said he 
 should lose nothing, for they would promote his 
 practice as much as was in their power. A few 
 months after I left I was rejoiced to hear he had 
 embraced religion, and joined the Presbyterian 
 Church. All the doctors called to see me in my 
 
 illness, and said, if at any time Dr. Brown was 
 
 31
 
 362 THE CEOSS. 
 
 absent, it would give them pleasure to wait on me. 
 The apothecary was equally generous in his depart- 
 ment. I can never forget the tender care with 
 which I was watched over by the young brethren 
 in the Church by night and day. When my last 
 spell of sickness was arrested I could not hold a 
 pen in my fingers so firmly as to write. My mind 
 was enfeebled as much as my body, and in the 
 utter absence of all appetite, I concluded I would 
 never engage again in the useless and dirty work 
 of eating. I argued that there was substance 
 enough in water to sustain life, and thought if I 
 could be only settled down by a clear spring, I 
 would ask no more. I continued in this way till 
 my wife had serious apprehensions that I would die 
 with starvation. One day some of the brethren 
 brought a large fish they had caught in the Scioto. 
 When I saw this a kind of recollection of past 
 agreeable acquaintance induced me to taste a piece, 
 then my appetite returned at once, like a cataract. 
 Three weeks embraces the amount of time that I 
 have been detained from my work by sickness in 
 the course of forty years. I have had considerable 
 sickness, but not of such a nature as to lay me up. 
 About this time Bishop Hamline, who was then 
 editor of the Repository, solicited me to write for 
 that monthly. I was surprised that he should 
 make such a request of me, but in explanation he 
 said that none of those on whom he had principally 
 relied would come to his help, and he was almost
 
 CIRCLEVILLE CIRCUIT. 363 
 
 alone in the work. I complied with his request, 
 and contributed to that magazine for several years, 
 and till the literati came to its succor, and I found 
 the editors were furnished with more material than 
 they could manage. 
 
 The great centenary celebration came on while 
 we were on this circuit. On that day I preached 
 to an overflowing congregation, in Circleville, on 
 "The weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but 
 mighty through God to the pulling down of strong- 
 holds." And my colleague and myself raised a 
 subscription of about thirteen hundred dollars, in 
 cash, land, etc., on the circuit. The enthusiasm of 
 the Methodists on that occasion was grand; indeed, 
 the Church there was in that day called, faithful, 
 and chosen ; and we hope they have not degenerated.
 
 364 THE CROSS. 
 
 XXVIII. 
 URBANA STATION. 
 
 1842. MY next circuit was London. The first 
 part of the year the weather was open, and the 
 long roads were very muddy. I had a little horse 
 that was as active as a deer, and it would have 
 puzzled the ingenuity of man to trip him. How- 
 ever, the creature had a hard gait, and splashed 
 the mud about like a beaver, so that, often, on my 
 return home, horse and man would look as if they 
 were lathed and plastered. 
 
 About this time I was taken with an affliction in 
 my loins, which has been like a thorn in my flesh ever 
 since, and has compelled me finally to cease riding. 
 While it has been wasting me away, my external 
 appearance has been robust and healthy. 
 
 I was now so worn out that it appeared I could 
 ride no longer. In my distress I wept, and called 
 on the Lord. One cold, rainy day, as I was riding 
 home through the mud, after hard labor, I saw a 
 person riding toward me, with his head braced 
 against the storm. As he passed he handed me a 
 letter. It was from my presiding elder, and directed 
 me to remove, as soon as I could, to Urbana. This 
 I gladly received as an express call from above. I
 
 URBANA STATION. 
 
 was not glad because I was going to exchange my 
 circuit for a station merely. The London circuit at 
 that time was a good circuit for any one in perfect 
 health. The brethren had liberally supplied my 
 table, stable, and wood-yard, and it was not neces- 
 sary to lay out much money. Still, in my gloomy 
 moments, it seemed to me that the people cared but 
 little about me. They were a prudent people, and 
 were not given to flattery. It is said, in order to 
 get a good name a man should die; and I would 
 have never known the estimate that the Church in 
 London had placed on me, had not my ministerial 
 term so suddenly expired. As soon as my orders 
 were known, there was almost a general insurrection 
 against my elder. Some of the leading men said 
 they would not let me go, unless I would promise, 
 as soon as I could, to come and ride their circuit 
 again. I told them I did not choose my places, for 
 that was contrary to Methodism ; but if the bishops 
 should appoint me there again, I would cheerfully 
 come so I would. Again, I was not glad of the 
 providence that led to my removal. The health of 
 brother Christie, which had been waning for some 
 time, was about exhausted. With tottering steps 
 he would ascend the pulpit in Urbana, against the 
 expostulations of his best friends. He would begin 
 his services in a feeble voice; but, gathering inter- 
 est and animation in his subject, his eyes would 
 flash up, his nerves tighten, and he would pour 
 forth his eloquence in his wonted volume of voice,
 
 366 THE CROSS. 
 
 as in days gone by. Having the consumption, he 
 appeared to be entirely insensible of the near- 
 ness of his death. A Presbyterian brother visited 
 him in the parsonage, and spoke of his rapid de- 
 cline, and made some religious remarks on his 
 removal, very soon, to the spirit-land. When he 
 retired, Christie looked round with a smile, and 
 said, " That good brother thinks he knows all about 
 my complaint." When he determined to visit his 
 friends in Cincinnati, he was so feeble that the 
 brethren had made arrangements to send a friend 
 to drive. This he would not listen to; he felt all- 
 sufficient for the journey. He could not drive far, 
 and his wife, who had never been accustomed to 
 horses, had to take the reins, although she had a 
 young child. When told by his brother-in-law, an 
 experienced physician, that death was upon him, he 
 seemed to be surprised but in a few moments ob- 
 served that he was ready, and thanked God that he 
 had not preached an unfelt Savior. He died 
 calmly, resigned, happy. 
 
 It was something of a cross to follow immediately 
 this seraphic minister; and the people, doubtless, 
 felt the change, but they were too good to let me 
 know it; and I preached here nearly two years 
 more with improving congregations. Brother Chris- 
 tie had a most extraordinary revival, both as it re- 
 garded numbers and its singular type. We hardly 
 know whether the word revival is suitable, as the 
 work was almost altogether among the irreligious,
 
 UKBANA STATION. 367 
 
 while the Church was comparatively in a lifeless 
 state, and receiving so many converts into the 
 Church was like putting a live child into the arms 
 of a dead mother. We often heard the members 
 conversing about that work, and wondering at it. 
 When mourners were called to the altar, they would 
 come promptly and in crowds. The members would 
 stand back amazed, and the heaviest work of the 
 preacher was to persuade them to the work. Al- 
 though they had generally been a working Church, 
 yet they had to be almost compelled to come up. 
 One of the leaders about the best leader in our 
 Conference when brought up almost by compulsion, 
 told me that he could hardly find a word to say to 
 the mourners. They would frequently say to each 
 other, "When will this meeting close?" and some of 
 them expressed a wish that it might close. The 
 backsliding that followed this work was also singu- 
 lar. A great number had gone back before I came 
 to the station, and many went after. 
 
 Another difficulty that met me at my coming 
 was a division of opinion in regard to the music. 
 A preacher who preceded Christie had put a choir 
 in the gallery. When Christie came he put it down. 
 The singers thought they were too lightly esteemed, 
 and refrained from taking any part in the singing. 
 Many who were opposed to choirs could not sing. 
 There was one very pious brother who could not sing 
 much better than myself, who was our only depend- 
 ence. Some of the young men said if he did not
 
 368 THE CROSS. 
 
 quit singing "John Grimes" they would whip him. 
 And we evidently needed some improvement in this 
 department. I was waited on by persons on both 
 sides of the question, and I listened complacently to 
 their reasons and arguments, and told them that I 
 required some little time to examine the subject. 
 After examining the Discipline I waited on one of 
 our principal singers, and told him that the gallery 
 was only a question of place, and if he would assist 
 me I would revive the singing in the center of the 
 congregation. He spoke to other singers, and they 
 agreed to this. I told two of them to take their 
 stations under the main lamp the next Sunday, 
 and to invite some females to do so on their side, 
 as leaders; and to invite other good singers to 
 sit by them, and all to be in place before public 
 service. On the Sabbath v.^ arose with the Disci- 
 pline in my hand and observed, that we had liad some 
 difficulty about singing, and all would admit that 
 there was room for improvement; that it was well 
 known that a difference of opinion existed in that 
 Church on the subject, but as a minister there was 
 but one course for me. When I entered into orders 
 I promised to adminster the Discipline with a mild 
 but firm hand. Now, what says the Discipline on 
 this very subject? "If you can not sing yourself 
 choose a person or two, at each place, to pitch the 
 tune for you. Exhort every person in the congre- 
 gation to sing." This is the order of the Discipline, 
 and I am sure I am in the path of duty. I appoint
 
 URBANA STATION. 369 
 
 these two brethren to pitch the tune mentioning 
 their names. I have stationed them under the large 
 lamps, where they will, on evenings, have the great- 
 est body of light', and where their voices will reach 
 all the walls of this spacious building at once, and 
 where they will not displace the old members. Every 
 one in the house is exhorted to sing with them. We 
 struck off delightfully, and the singing increased in 
 purity and melody every Sabbath, till it was en- 
 chanting; and strangers from the eastward said 
 they had heard no better singing in the Atlantic 
 cities. 
 
 I mention this because difficulties often arise 
 about singing, and the devil is never better pleased 
 than wheQ he can turn this part of divine worship 
 into contention and strife. It has been my rule 
 never to put up a choir here there has never been 
 one, and 'not to pull down a choir where it is. In 
 either case it will raise a smoke in the wigwam. I 
 believe in improving in singing as well as in other 
 matters. The people of Urbana deserve great 
 credit. At the time we are reviewing, they had 
 spent fifteen hundred dollars in the acquisition of 
 vocal music, and they had then a most accomplished 
 teacher. During my short stay on London circuit 
 I was associated with brother John Steele, with 
 whom I renewed fellowship in travel in subsequent 
 years. Brother Zachariah Connell was our presiding 
 elder. It is doubtful whether the Ohio Conference, 
 in all its history, ever had a better. He was clad
 
 370 THE CROSS. 
 
 in pure Methodism, in doctrine, discipline, and 
 usage. He was a strong preacher, argumentative 
 and forcible; and with the professing congregation, 
 on Monday mornings, tender, melting, and experi- 
 mental. I never heard him preach without wishing 
 I could have his sermon written as it fell from his 
 lips. He only wanted the voice and delivery to 
 make him perfect in preaching. 
 
 We had a revival in Urbana. The work was not 
 so great among the irreligious we only received 
 about fifty new members but the Church was very 
 lively, and some professed to receive sanctification. 
 We suppose there is not a more pleasant station in 
 the Conference than Urbana. Many of the old 
 members have passed into their rest. May the 
 smiles of Heaven rest upon their offspring!
 
 HAMILTON STATION. 371 
 
 XXIX. 
 
 HAMILTON STATION-MONROE 
 CIRCUIT. 
 
 HAMILTON STATION. 
 
 1843. HAMILTON is one of the most pleasant 
 places in our State; and, in our day, we had flush 
 congregations. But we received the charge with a 
 great drawback; Millerism was then in its zenith 
 perhaps a little beyond. It had infected the 
 Church, not in the extremities, but it had disor- 
 dered its head by getting hold of some of the 
 officiary. We say some; the larger part of that 
 department was sound. We saw clearly that we 
 could not get round it, still we fully comprehended 
 the delicacy of laying a hand upon it, and saw the 
 propriety of the caution of the Discipline "mild 
 but firm." As it was the all-absorbing subject, we 
 so far took to the current as to give our views on 
 the subject. 
 
 We have always believed that where a charge is 
 endangered by any besetting evil, it is the duty of 
 the preacher to pay attention to that evil in a pru- 
 dent manner. Under this impression we have 
 sometimes had to make almost a new set of ser-
 
 372 THE CROSS. 
 
 mons. To preach sermons that would suit equally 
 New York, Cincinnati, or any other place, when a 
 deadly evil is eating up our charge, is nothing 
 more than stage-horse monotony. In Hamilton we 
 undertook to show that however startling the fig- 
 ures of Mr. Miller might appear to some, he was 
 wrong in their application. The end that the 
 vision of Daniel referred to was not the end of the 
 world. What did such a good man as Daniel care 
 about the end of the world? One who could sleep 
 all night with a lion for his pillow and a tiger for 
 his footboard, had no effeminate tremors about the 
 end of the world. As a captive Jew he did mourn 
 over the prostration of the Church of the living 
 God. Jerusalem was in ruins, and all the pleasant 
 things of Mount Zion laid waste. He fasted, wept, 
 and prayed, and desired to see an end to the deso- 
 lation of the Church, and he cried out "how long? 
 how long? O Lord!" The vision itself was not to 
 gratify the curiosity of an individual, but to com- 
 fort the Church for ages to come. 
 
 We endeavored also to show that the end the 
 restitution of Israel would be the birthday of the 
 kingdom of Christ, the universal reign of grace; 
 that this glorious reign would last more than three 
 hundred thousand years; that the very structure 
 of the earth seemed to favor this doctrine, inas- 
 much as we had barely lifted the crust and entered 
 on the thresholds of immense beds of minerals 
 suited to the wants of a civilized and Christianized
 
 HAMILTON STATION. 373 
 
 world for ages to come; and our earth was supplied 
 with a cargo and all necessary small stores for the 
 eventful voyage. We showed them that the vision 
 of John, in the Isle of Patmos, agreed with this 
 view, putting the millennium before the day of gen- 
 eral judgment. We argued that their doctrine was 
 wrong because it troubled the Churches. The same 
 doctrine was broached in the apostles' day, and one 
 of them wrote to the Churches "Be not troubled." 
 It troubles the Churches now. We did not at first 
 think it would. We said, Supposing it is false, if 
 Christians believe the judgment is immediately im- 
 pending, surely they will live more holy, have more 
 love for God and man. Vain thought! The errors 
 of man can not work the righteousness of God. 
 The Church is troubled now; separate prayer meet- 
 ings are established, in which old and faithful 
 members are regarded as infidels, however bright 
 their experience or holy their lives; they lack the 
 sine qua non, faith in the doctrines of Millerism. 
 The preachers are publicly denounced as blind lead- 
 ers of the blind. And does all this look like being 
 prepared for the coming of the Lord? 
 
 Again, the argument of Miller is in direct oppo- 
 sition to that of Christ. Millerism ,says, "Because 
 we know the day, we will watch and pray." Christ 
 Bays, "Because you know not the day, watch and 
 pray." Here the "knowing not the day" is the 
 argument why we should watch and pray; and the 
 argument is natural as well as evangelical. Sup-
 
 374 THE CROSS. 
 
 pose a man should receive a letter from his father, 
 that he has not seen for many years, stating that 
 he would spend a particular day say Friday at 
 his house; that man would not watch for his 
 father on any other day. If pressing business 
 should call him away on Monday, Tuesday, or 
 Wednesday, he would go. But, suppose the letter 
 should state that his father would be at his house 
 some time next week; then he would watch for him 
 all the time. If business or pleasure should call, 
 he would say, I can not go, I must watch for my 
 father, for I know not the day he will come; he 
 watches all the time. 
 
 But we had something to do besides preaching. 
 Our Church was in a bad way. At our official 
 meeting, one leader complained that his class had 
 ceased to meet him, but still he seemed to have no 
 notion of resigning. I told him I would take his 
 book, and visit the whole class immediately. The 
 class was made up mostly of females. Their testi- 
 mony was generally to this amount: "We love 
 class meeting; but our leader, of late, asks each 
 of us if we are just ready to go to judgment. 
 We answer, we can not say that we are. We love 
 God, and are trying to serve him; and we believe 
 that he will give us grace for" that day when it 
 comes. He then denounces us as in the gall of bit- 
 terness lost, and undone. Such class meetings do 
 us no good." At the next official meeting we made 
 a faithful report, without censuring the leader.
 
 HAMILTON STATION. 375 
 
 Some of the members said they believed, if their 
 class should abandon them thus, they would at once 
 resign. Such talk went round, without any reflec- 
 tions on the leader, till at last he grasped the idea, 
 and threw up. Thus one of the latter-day saints 
 was eased off without violence. 
 
 Two of our exhorters were propagating Miller's 
 doctrine, especially the annihilation of the wicked. 
 We had a calm interview with one, and, after hear- 
 ing his statement, asked him if he was well assured 
 that the doctrine was Scriptural. He said he was 
 not as well satisfied as he wished to be on the sub- 
 ject. He read many passages that seemed to favor 
 it, and then he saw some Scriptures that seemed to 
 be against it, and his own mind was not settled. 
 Then, brother, do you think it safe and right to 
 preach to others doctrines concerning which you 
 yourself are doubtful? He said it did not seem 
 right; and he would promise to desist till, after a 
 longer investigation, he might be convinced the 
 doctrine was of God. Thinking that, if he would 
 do this, we might be able to manage the case, we 
 went to see the other brother. He obstinately held 
 to his views, and was zealous to convert us. We 
 told him that many of the brethren were dissatis- 
 fied, and perhaps some of them would call for an 
 explanation at the quarterly conference, which was 
 soon to be held, and then he would have an oppor- 
 tunity of defining his position. At that conference, 
 some of the officiary stated that there were unfa-
 
 376 THE CROSS. 
 
 vorable reports concerning that brother's orthodoxy, 
 and he rose up, and gave an honest exposition of his 
 faith, and his license was withdrawn. Then the 
 first-mentioned exhorter took fire, rose to defend his 
 colleague, and in so doing committed himself, and 
 lost his license. They still continued in the Church, 
 but stripped of their power to do harm. 
 
 Another man, who had exercised considerable 
 influence in the Church, read, in the Advocate, a 
 communication under the caption of "The Setting 
 Goose." He found out, somehow, that I was the 
 author. And, although there was nothing personal 
 or local in it, but merely an exhibition of the 
 deathless "hang-on" of Millerism, it afforded an 
 opportunity, and he came to withdraw from the 
 Church. We expostulated, and showed the unrea- 
 sonableness of his forsaking God and the Church, 
 merely because a brother, in a free country, had 
 expressed an opinion contrary to his own. 0, he 
 was not going to forsake God; he was more devoted 
 than ever loved his Bible better, because he under- 
 stood it better. 
 
 "Brother, you may think so now; but let me 
 tell you, you are driving fast toward the whirlpool 
 of infidelity, and it will not be long before your 
 Bible will be covered with dust, and you will lay it 
 aside like a loathsome thing. Your family altar, 
 too, will be cast down; and when you find that the 
 Lord will not burn up our world at your beck and 
 call, you will spurn his service."
 
 HAMILTON STATION. 377 
 
 He smiled at my simplicity, and took his depart- 
 ure. Nevertheless, all these things came to pass. 
 About three weeks before the world was to be 
 burned up, the said man, supposing he saw a spec- 
 ulation, traded off his property in Rossville for a 
 place in Hamilton. "We saw another distinguished 
 disciple, about the same time, setting out fruit trees 
 not much larger than a rattan-cane. We looked 
 over his fence, and said, " Brother, how long will it 
 be before these trees will bear fruit?" He appeared 
 to be considerably nettled by the question. It is 
 astonishing how people will torment a whole Church 
 with something that they themselves can not be- 
 lieve ! 
 
 They finally brought up from Cincinnati the great 
 tabernacle. The people went to see it through the 
 week as a curiosity, and its priests expected on the 
 Sabbath to empty all the churches. But Israel 
 abode in their tents, and the vast proportions of the 
 tabernacle served to display more fully its discour- 
 aging emptiness. The people of Hamilton were 
 denounced as irreclaimable, and the tabernacle 
 returned to its rest. In answer to one of our argu- 
 ments the preacher said he frankly admitted that 
 in the Apocalypse the millennium was placed before 
 the day of judgment, but he could easily account 
 for that. The apostles wrote on separate slips, and 
 the fathers, in binding the book, had got the day of 
 judgment shuffled out of its place. This was re- 
 ceived with a broad grin of approbation. And who 
 
 32
 
 378 THE CROSS. 
 
 could withstand such intimacy with the blunders of 
 the fathers? 
 
 Through the mercy of God we got rid of this 
 pestilence, and without a single expulsion. Still, 
 those who were involved in this error had their re- 
 lations or connection in the Church; and although 
 they did not participate in their views, and some- 
 times ridiculed them in the family circle, yet they 
 were their kin, and they did not wish others to 
 touch them. So, although my congregation was as 
 large as it ever was before, and, perhaps, has been 
 since, yet I concluded that I had done a good work, 
 and laid a smooth platform for a successor; so I 
 earnestly entreated the presiding elder to procure 
 me a circuit next year. This he did, but declared 
 I should not have been removed, only on my own 
 solicitation. My brother's daughter, that we had 
 raised from a child Ellen was married and settled 
 in Hamilton. We feel very much attached to the 
 place, for we had many kind friends there. We re- 
 gard Hamilton as one of the best stations. May the 
 Lord have the people in his holy keeping ! 
 
 MONROE. 
 
 1844. This year we removed to Monroe, a small 
 but very pleasant charge, abounding with loyal 
 Methodists. Here we had the satisfaction of resid- 
 ing with brother Connell, our presiding elder; and 
 we became more and more attached to him as we 
 became better and better acquainted. On one circuit,
 
 MONEOE. 379 
 
 where I labored, the people did not like him at first 
 sight, especially when he undertook to reform their 
 order in quarterly conference, which, by the by, was 
 no order at all. But when his term expired they 
 voluntarily passed resolutions highly eulogizing his 
 character, and thanking him for the reformation he 
 had made in their councils, and for what he had 
 taught them of law, order, and Methodism. Connell 
 never suffered himself to kick back, but left all to 
 God, conscience, and time, and he always triumphed. 
 We had large congregations on this circuit, good 
 meetings, great peace, but no extra revival. Monroe 
 has lately become a station, and of the first order, 
 we are told. It is situated in a beautiful part of 
 our State. In our day they had a large Presby- 
 terian connection around.
 
 380 THE CROSS. 
 
 XXX. 
 
 PUTNAM STATION. 
 
 1848. IT was by hard traveling that I reached 
 this station on Saturday evening my goods all 
 lying topsy-turvy, and my preaching tacks not on 
 board. I*o not know but that the people thought 
 it was a slim chance. One intelligent brother said, 
 "Why, you don't look like I thought you would. 
 I have read your communications in the Eepository 
 and Advocate, and I had painted to myself a tall, 
 slim, scholastic-looking man; but, but " 
 
 An old veteran, who knew me in years gone by on 
 the Zanesville circuit, passed among them, and said, 
 "Be still! I'll go his security." 
 
 What a prestige! a thin man and a pair of green 
 spectacles ! In a few weeks the brethren began to 
 draw nigh to me, and I drew nigh to them; and in 
 process of time I became entirely too popular. Some 
 of them, supposing I was impervious to temptation, 
 would praise me to my face, and I got alarmed, and 
 pressed closer to my closet and my knees, and hoped 
 the Lord would not kill me or do me any harm, be- 
 cause the members were so imprudent. When my 
 year was out they expressed a wish for me to come
 
 PUTNAM STATION. 381 
 
 back. On this point I have always expressed my- 
 self as uncertain, and as being at the disposal of the 
 bishops. This perhaps made them suspicious of me; 
 so two of the stewards attended Conference, and 
 watched the bishops and watched me till my ap- 
 pointment was fixed. When my second year was 
 expiring, and in one of. our last official meetings, 
 one, speaking for all, said, 
 
 "Brother L., if our Discipline would admit it, we 
 would agree with the bishops to take you for five 
 years to come. You preach the Gospel jn every 
 sermon, and yet you have never preached two ser- 
 mons alike." 
 
 When I first came on this circuit the leading 
 members said they had heard I was a great disci- 
 plinarian, and they wished that I would prune their 
 Church, for there was great delinquency in regard 
 to attending class and other matters. I told them 
 this would depend in a great measure on themselves ; 
 that discipline must begin with them; charges must 
 originate with them. If members could not be per- 
 suaded by them to attend class, they must hand me 
 their names; then it would be my duty to see 
 them, and if they would not reform, I would have 
 to bring them to trial. They took me at my word, 
 and I had enough to do. We had to lay aside 
 some forty or fifty from time to time. The next 
 year I read in the Advocate of a revival there. At 
 this my heart rejoiced, and after a while we visited 
 them. I was congratulating some of the brethren
 
 382 THE CROSS. 
 
 on the work they had had. They smiled, and said, 
 "Yes, brother, we have taken in again all you cast 
 overboard, without any promise of doing better, 
 and they don't attend their classes any better than 
 they did before they were put out. This is the re- 
 vival, with the addition of a few who never belonged." 
 
 I felt in my heart, "I have labored in vain, and 
 spent my strength for naught." 
 
 The two years spent in Putnam were unusually 
 pleasant. Brother Dustin had the old charge, and 
 brother Warnock the new, in Zanesville during that 
 time; an<rwe were truly a threefold cord. We had 
 a social, happy time with our families. When the 
 Zanesville friends invited their preachers to break 
 bread, they would frequently invite us, and the 
 Putnam friends would return the compliment. The 
 upper room of Warnock's church being finished, it 
 was determined to have a dedication. One of our 
 bishops was to preach the sermon; but he sent 
 word after a while that he could not come. They 
 then tried to get a distinguished preacher from the 
 city, but he could not come; time rolling on. So I 
 supposed one of their own ministers would preach 
 it. True, they had been joking, as I thought, me 
 about it. A few days before perhaps the Friday 
 before the set time, a member from Zanesville 
 came over, and opening his hymn-book, pointed out 
 two hymns, and said, 
 
 "Brother Lorrain, the sisters have selected these 
 two hymns to be given out at the dedication."
 
 PUTNAM STATION. 383 
 
 "But stop, brother," said I, "you should carry 
 them to brother Warnock or Dustin, as the case 
 may be." 
 
 "Why? It has been given out for you to preach 
 the dedication." 
 
 I was confounded, if I know what confounded 
 means. At first I was tempted to think the preach- 
 ers, in view of an expected disappointment, had con- 
 cluded to lay the burden on Jonah, as a scape-goat. 
 But I had to say, "Down, down, busy devil, try it 
 again;" for they were too good to play this game. 
 So, at the time appointed, we gathered up our good 
 singers to add to the choir, and all our praying 
 folks followed. The music was extra, and I felt 
 something like Saul, the son of Kish, under the 
 melody of David's harp, and preached to the crowd- 
 ed congregation. We had a mellow time, and when 
 I closed, brother Brush and the trustees pitched in, 
 and before the benediction was given they wiped off 
 the whole debt as clean as a woman would wipe a 
 dish, turning it upside down. Hush ! Let me tell 
 it, for I never dedicated but three houses in all my 
 travel. 
 
 Let not the reader suppose that because we mag- 
 nify the kindness of the people of Putnam, that we 
 never were popular before or since. We only give 
 this 2$ an example of sunshine, we have sometimes 
 had our clouds and conflicts, met with oppositions 
 and inflictions from members, that would make a 
 pious Chinese blush; but we lay all our wrongs be-
 
 384 THE CROSS. 
 
 fore the throne, firmly settled in the decree, " Ven- 
 geance is mine, and I will repay." And we have 
 sometimes viewed with astonishment the cup of 
 trembling as it has passed round. 
 
 There is one circumstance connected with this 
 station which should be mentioned, as it has a bear- 
 ing on the Discipline. The Presbyterian Church in 
 Putnam had generally a pious membership. They 
 were closely allied to the Methodists by relationship 
 and marriage connections. They had been in the 
 habit, under all administrations, of communing 
 with our people. For some time they had ceased 
 to do so. Our people naturally inquired why they 
 had discontinued communing. "Because," said 
 they, "your elder has never given us the accustomed 
 invitation." At our next quarterly conference some 
 of our leading men introduced a resolution respect- 
 fully requesting the presiding elder to invite to our 
 sacrament members of other Churches. The elder 
 said he could not conscientiously do this, as the 
 Discipline expressly showed that persons of other 
 Churches could not be admitted without a token. I 
 saw that a storm was gathering, and in order to 
 allay it I rose and observed, "That as it regarded 
 the token, I had never seen one in my life, and 
 would be altogether at a loss to make one. We had 
 been told that some Churches made them out of lead ; 
 but how, or with what tools, we knew not. Still, 
 the presiding elder had the Discipline on his side, 
 and it would be wrong to require him to go against
 
 PUTNAM STATION. 385 
 
 his conscience; but if the Discipline was altered, 
 conscience would be met. Now, the General Con- 
 * ference will meet in Pittsburg before our next 
 quarterly conference, and I suggest that a committee 
 be appointed to petition it on the subject." This 
 idea gave another turn to the matter. They ap- 
 pointed a committee, and passed a resolution that 
 the elder should lay the subject before all the 
 quarterly conferences. I was chairman of the com- 
 mittee, and drew up a paper, with as much ginger 
 in it as the solemnity of the occasion could bear. 
 Presently we read, in the Pittsburg daily, that a 
 petition was received from Putnam in regard to the 
 sacrament of the Lord's Supper, and was referred to 
 a committee. Presently we read that a petition, 
 counter to the above, had been remitted by the pre- 
 siding elder. 
 
 At last we read that the clause in the Discipline 
 requiring a token, etc., had been struck out. At 
 the next quarterly conference, on Saturday night, 
 I reminded the elder that the "token" had been 
 abolished, and our people would expect him to give 
 an invitation to members of other Churches. He 
 said he would not do it. After giving out several 
 appointments, he said brother L. might give out his 
 appointments. I invited all in good standing to 
 meet us at the Lord's table on the Sabbath. They 
 came, and we had a delightful communion. Now, 
 if there is any credit due for flinging away that 
 
 obsolete, or rather never-used "token," let the 
 
 33
 
 386 THE CROSS. 
 
 Church of Putnam have her share. Did I say never 
 used? I might add, used only by some of our Bap- 
 tist brethren, when they flirt it in our face, as an 
 evidence of our close communion. And this they 
 have done often since the rule has been repealed. 
 But we can say, " Ou est le papier?"
 
 ASBURY CIRCUIT. 387 
 
 XXXI. 
 
 ASBURY CIBOUIT-HARMAR STATION. 
 
 1849. WE had been kindly stationed in Putnam 
 in order to recover our health; and there was a 
 fine prospect of restoration. But, at the next Con- 
 ference, I was thrown on one of the most difficult 
 circuits I ever rode, and my saddle disease returned 
 in all its force. In riding up one hill and down 
 another, my situation in the saddle became so pain- 
 ful that I often had to get down and walk. On 
 one occasion I walked, and led my horse, seven 
 miles through unbroken snow and mud; and, when 
 I got home, felt as if I had taken my last prome- 
 nade. But I made the best of it, and" carried out 
 a scheme which had been devised the previous year, 
 and to all my other gettings I added the French 
 language, so far as to find access to its literature. 
 Perhaps, if I could have endured another year, I 
 might have attacked the Hebrew, for my faculties 
 were stretched out to their extreme tension by the 
 things which I had suffered. 
 
 We had several revivals at different points, but 
 had to loosen our grip of many of our spoils before 
 the year was out. Indeed, in one place, we had to 
 drop nearly all. The converts were of Baptist
 
 388 THE CEOSS. 
 
 raising, and their relations appeared as if they 
 would rather see them lost than to be united to 
 the Methodists. They were most violent against 
 them, and would say, "Wait till the 'Old Horn' 
 comes." This was a nickname they had given to 
 their preacher intended as a compliment who, 
 they supposed, had all the treasures of wisdom. 
 When Old Horn came, he decided that they had 
 not begun to know any thing about true religion; 
 they had only fallen into Methodist delusion. And, 
 as he piqued himself on wit, he publicly caricatured 
 Methodism, so as to place it before them in a ridic- 
 ulous light. Through all this they could see his 
 dishonesty, because he strongly urged them all to 
 join his Church. Their high delusion would in a 
 moment form an experience sufficient to introduce 
 them into his Church. But they scorned his pro- 
 posals, though they were driven back some of 
 them, we fear, to perdition. A number of them 
 had given satisfactory evidence of a real conversion. 
 And some held fast their confidence. 
 
 When the "Old Horn" had succeeded in scatter- 
 ing the Baptist children, he said, with great exult- 
 ation, "I told you so; once in grace always in 
 grace." I love good Baptists, whether preachers or 
 members; and it has been my lot to know many 
 such. But the preachers of that part of the coun- 
 try were dram-drinkers, and they were not ashamed 
 of it. When they stopped at a house, the jug was 
 immediately seen traveling to the grocery. One of
 
 ASBURY CIRCUIT. 389 
 
 the preachers was heard to say he did like to take 
 a dram before preaching, because it took away the 
 fear of man. This same man came out to the grove 
 to hear Ebenezer Chase preach on temperance. He 
 stretched himself along a log, and prepared to hear 
 in such a way as might indicate his contempt of 
 both the preacher and the cause. Chase had occa- 
 sion to speak of ministers who were opposed to 
 temperance, and, among other things, observed, "I 
 have heard of a minister not a hundred miles 
 from here who said he liked to take a dram be- 
 fore preaching, because it took away the fear of 
 man, which is a snare." The gentleman sprang up 
 into a decent position, and his face flushed a deeper 
 red; and well it might, for the eyes of the whole 
 congregation were fastened on him. 
 
 Ebenezer Chase was a Methodist preacher of the 
 highest order. He was always successful; and lived 
 in the affections of the people of his charge. And 
 yet some of his distant friends hardly know that he 
 has, years ago, reached the haven. We are almost 
 tired of reading, for successive years, the eulogies 
 of our classical brethren who have made good marks 
 as they passed along, and are worthy of remem- 
 brance; but others, whose apostolic epistles are 
 scattered over all the land, are laid by almost in 
 silence. The reason is, those of blue ribbon and 
 green spectacles can not and ought not forget 
 their chums; and we of the saddle-bag class ought 
 to do likewise that is, when we get a chance. So,
 
 390 THE CEOSS. 
 
 Ebenezer, Ebenezer! "if departed spirits are per- 
 mitted to review this world," look down compla- 
 cently on one with whom thou hast taken sweet 
 counsel in the days of thy pilgrimage, and accept 
 this small record of thy worth. And let all who 
 read say, amen. 
 
 My colleague on this circuit was Sanford Haines, 
 a very promising young married man. He emi- 
 grated, next year, to Iowa, to enter on broad fields 
 of future usefulness. 
 
 We took in many members ; but, as a new circuit 
 was made the year previous, we can not tell how 
 many were taken from us, and consequently can 
 not find what the increase was by the Minutes. 
 
 HARMAR STATION. 
 
 1851. This was a beautiful town at the junction 
 of the Muskingum and Ohio Eivers. It was, for 
 the time being, the residence of our presiding elder, 
 who was once one of the brightest boys in our 
 Xenia Sunday school Uriah Heath. The town of 
 Marietta was on the opposite bank. The towns 
 were subject to partial overflows occasionally; but, 
 through mercy, they were exempt during our 
 sojourn. "We had a pretty little meeting-house, but 
 the ceiling was unusually low only a few feet 
 above the pulpit. 
 
 On a quarterly meeting occasion the house was 
 closely crowded one night, and it was my lot to 
 preach. The elder requested me to call up mourn-
 
 HARMAK STATION. 391 
 
 ers before I was done. As I rose up in the vitiated 
 atmosphere I felt very sensibly oppressed; I, how- 
 ever, finished my sermon, and was exhorting sin- 
 ners, when all at once a singular unconsciousness 
 in regard to what I was saying came over me. I 
 suppose I talked ten minutes or a quarter of an 
 hour, something that I could not comprehend then, 
 and which I could not remember after. The 
 thought struck me that I had been talking non- 
 sense or something irrelevant to the occasion, and I 
 sat down utterly dismayed. Mourners came up, 
 and the elder carried on the meeting; but I got 
 low in the pulpit, and felt greatly ashamed. When 
 I got home I found that I could not remember the 
 names of my near neighbors. When I learned from 
 my elder that I had said nothing out of the way, 
 and that he wondered that I staid in the pulpit, I 
 felt greatly relieved in my mind. He stated that 
 he had experienced the same thing occasionally. 
 The doctor said it was prostration by too much 
 labor and watching, and that I must rest. I was 
 not able to continue the meeting, and as the elder 
 was alone, and had to leave soon, the meeting was 
 closed. A minister preached there one night, but 
 just after he commenced he had to stop and order 
 them to open all the windows. He believed his 
 very life was in danger. 
 
 It was while here that I published my "Sea-Ser- 
 mons." Brother J. F. Wright kindly undertook 
 the supervision of the publication in Cincinnati.
 
 392 THE CKOSS. 
 
 When the manuscript was prepared and directed 
 to its destination, I took it into an upper room, 
 laid it in a chair, and kneeled down to spread it be- 
 fore the Lord with all my motives and purpose; 
 but as I bowed down a powerful influence almost 
 pressed me to the floor, and I felt that the work 
 was approved. In my travels I had clear evidences 
 of the efficacy of these sermons, viva voce, and since 
 their publication I have received from distant 
 parts, by correspondence, testimony of their utility. 
 What may be in the future is unknown, but I be- 
 lieve, in presenting them before the Lord, I had a 
 clear spiritual indication that they were accepted. 
 
 My motives as expressed to my fellow-men were 
 these: There has been of late years a great refor- 
 mation among seamen. Bethels have been estab- 
 lished and chaplains have been appointed in many 
 ports, both at home and abroad; and many cheer- 
 ing revivals have taken place. We believe that all 
 this has been by the direction of a wise and holy 
 God. When our Savior began to preach his ever- 
 lasting Gospel, he chose his ministers principally 
 from the sea. True, it was an inland sea a lake; 
 but still it was the sea of God's chosen nation. 
 And in bringing in the latter-day glory, it should 
 not be incredible that seamen should be called to 
 bear an important part. 
 
 The author of this work spent the morning of his 
 life on the sea, both before and abaft the mast. 
 His heart and his affections still twine around his
 
 HARMAR STATION. 393 
 
 shipmates. The most lifelike dreams that come 
 over him in the slumbers of the night are rigged 
 in marine scenery. Then he is on board, either as 
 a missionary or a sailor, but always under a sense 
 of religious obligations. At such times the motions 
 of the ship, the peculiar odor of the rigging, the 
 saline savor of the Atlantic atmosphere, are all 
 realized with vivid certainty; but he awakes, and 
 finds himself securely moored by domestic associa- 
 tions in the far West. He reads of the sailors' 
 happy meetings, of their bright conversions, and 
 would love to mingle in their sincere and artless 
 communion; but his lot forbids. While he rejoices 
 in the abundant ministerial provision which is made 
 for seamen while in port, he knows that their brief 
 stay on land is a kind of parenthesis in their being 
 a time of extraordinary excitement of meeting and 
 greeting of friends and connections, if not a time 
 of indulgences less innocent. Perhaps there is no 
 time when the sailor is so accessible to the Gospel 
 as when he is at home on the mountain wave. 
 Then he is removed from many powerful tempta- 
 tions, and the sober realities of life are upon him. 
 Then he has opportunity, in his watches below, to 
 read and meditate on religious truths. We can 
 hardly look forward to any time when every vessel 
 can be supplied with a living minister. These con- 
 siderations have moved the author to put out this 
 volume. It may serve as a pocket companion for 
 the sailor. The author sends forth the book hum-
 
 394 THE CKOSS. 
 
 bly imploring the God of the land and the sea to 
 follow it with his blessing, and to make it useful to 
 many, 
 
 " When his poor, lisping, stammering tongue 
 Lies silent in the grave." 
 
 Soon after we left Harmar many of the leading 
 members of the Church were removed by death in 
 the space of a few weeks.
 
 FULTON STATION. 395 
 
 XXXII. 
 
 FULTON STATION QENERAL CONFER- 
 ENCE. 
 
 1852. AT the time we labored here there was a 
 very energetic Church. The members were well 
 gifted in prayer and exhortation male and female 
 and our large house was generally well filled. I at- 
 tended always the weekly prayer meeting, and can 
 not say we ever had a lifeless prayer meeting, even 
 when the streets were almost impassable, and we 
 were reduced to two or three. The occupation of 
 the people boat-building and kindred works 
 render the community movable and vacillating; and 
 they sometimes experience sudden reverses in their 
 income, but they are always generous according to 
 their means. This is what God requires, and no 
 more. The members were scattered about two miles 
 along the river, and this made visiting very labori- 
 ous. Still this was modified through the omnibuses 
 that were constantly passing and repassing. It is 
 moreover a place of alternate mud and dust in their 
 extremes. For these reasons the preachers are not 
 content to make it their abiding place, with the ex- 
 ception of brother Joseph E-eeder, who is one of our
 
 396 >- THE CROSS. 
 
 comically good men, and who might, without irrev- 
 erence, be called "the angel of the Church at Ful- 
 ton;" and if the pattern should fall any way short, 
 his pious and devoted wife will make it up. 
 
 This year I had to attend the General Confer- 
 ence. I confess candidly I had no ambition to grat- 
 ify. Although I had been ambitious, and once 
 grasped, under our political government, two offices 
 at once, and panted after more, yet when I devoted 
 myself to the itinerancy I renounced the spirit, and 
 have ever since dodged all kinds of Church promo- 
 tion. Some may think it did not require very hard 
 dodging. It is my business to record my testimony, 
 nevertheless. Still my heart was made glad by the 
 election, because it was to me such a cheering 
 demonstration of the affection of my fellow-laborers 
 in the vineyard of the Lord. This was more than 
 honor, or silver and gold. And then, about this 
 time, I had a longing desire to revisit the sea-board, 
 and especially Boston, because it was the only sea- 
 port of consequence on our coast that I had not 
 seen. The brethren of the Ohio Conference knew 
 very well that I would not thunder in the North; 
 and it was a pure expression of their esteem. Let 
 it be understood that we do not find fault with those 
 who desire distinguished places, because they think 
 they can do more good; but we would warn them 
 that the higher they climb up in the Methodist 
 Episcopal Church the more thorns and briers they 
 will pass through. I have never envied those who
 
 GENEEAL CONFERENCE. 397 
 
 are in authority, for some must be. The love of 
 God throws down all distinction; and he who is 
 good is my brother, whether he wears the thorny 
 miter of a Methodist bishopric, or roasts his venison 
 by the wild fires of the trackless prairie. 
 
 On our way to the General Conference we left 
 Cleveland about dusk, under a lowering atmosphere, 
 with the lake sufficiently rough to induce seasick- 
 ness in those who were not accustomed to voyaging. 
 Late in the evening supper was set. As we had no 
 idea how many hundred passengers were- on board, 
 at the signal given, we entered the dining-room, 
 and saw a very long table crowded with eaters, and 
 as many more, standing back on each side, awaiting 
 their turn. Our happy forerunners ate as leisurely 
 as if it had been a thanksgiving board. When they 
 were shoveling it down I thought to myself it was 
 a useless operation, especially as it regarded the 
 ladies, some of whom appeared as if they had never 
 seen good things before; for I believed they could 
 not retain their delicious tenants having been on 
 deck taking a scientific view of the prognostications. 
 When the dishes were changed, and the second sig- 
 nal given, I thought I would take a reef in my usual 
 gentility; so made a dash, but it was not a dash in. 
 There were so many there who had been rougher 
 raised than myself. At the third course I succeeded 
 in sitting down, with about two hundred of the 
 cream of the gentility, as I thought. 
 
 After supper the gale freshened, and many were
 
 398 THE CROSS. 
 
 seeking convenient stands about the gunwale where 
 they might slyly throw away their fifty cents' worth ; 
 others were strolling about the cabin like buckeyed 
 cows. After a while gagging became so fashionable 
 that no one seemed to be ashamed sovereign fash- 
 ion! Some of our preachers made from three to 
 seven offerings to Neptune, if he deigns to range 
 through fresh-water seas. We did not, however, 
 charge them with idolatry, as their sacrifices were 
 unwilling. About midnight the chambermaids 
 made a great fuss running up and down the stairs 
 of the ladies' cabin. We asked one how matters 
 went on below. She said, " 0, sir, I wish you could 
 see! they are scattered on the carpet, and in their 
 berths, and every-where; nothing but gagging, lam- 
 entation, and woe." But I had no craving desire 
 to behold the scene. I had a hungry time in wit- 
 nessing the ingress, and could dispense with behold- 
 ing the outcome. At first I had some little appre- 
 hension of an attack, as it had been so many years 
 since I had followed the seas, and I thought there 
 would be a kind of disgrace in getting seasick on a 
 lake. But I had no nausea at all, and was good for 
 my breakfast. So I wandered about the decks, and 
 enjoyed the storm, which awakened so many remem- 
 brances in my mind that I could not sleep. As night 
 set in, something like the following conversation was 
 heard among the hands, on the between-decks : 
 
 "We may calculate on having a greasy time be- 
 fore morning."
 
 GENERAL CONFERENCE. 399 
 
 "Why so?" 
 
 "Why, because I never in my life sailed with a 
 white horse on board without smoking for it." 
 
 " You do n't say we have a white horse on this 
 boat?" 
 
 "Yes, worse still, we have two as snow-white 
 creters with us as you ever clapped your skylights 
 on." 
 
 "You don't say!" 
 
 "Well, I can give you a bit of comfort to splice 
 on to that. We have about a dozen Methodist 
 preachers above, if I rightly twig the cut of their 
 jib, going to the Gineral Conference, as they call 
 it." 
 
 "Goola! if I had known that, this child would 
 not have put his foot on board, this trip. White 
 horses, and Methodist preachers! Look out, boys, 
 for a rip-sneezer !" 
 
 We could but meditate awhile on the exactness 
 with which the traditions of superstition have been 
 handed down from generation to generation. Sail- 
 ors have been shy of ministerial passengers ever 
 since Jonah was launched overboard. This super- 
 stition has been cherished more by the erroneous 
 doctrine that the devil has peculiar privileges with 
 the wind and the sea. This they take as granted, 
 without any waste of rhetoric or logic; and as they 
 know that preachers meddle a great deal with his 
 matters, they conclude that Old Nick would not be 
 so green as to let slip a fair opportunity of making
 
 400 THE CROSS. 
 
 them feel his wrath. If sailors would study the 
 narrative of Jonah, in connection, they would see 
 that the "Lord" not Satan "sent out a great 
 wind into the sea." This is agreeable to the doc- 
 trine of the Bible: "It is He that commandeth the 
 stormy wind, that lifteth up the waves thereof." 
 Moreover, Jonah was following the counsel of the 
 wicked one, in attempting to flee from his duty, 
 and his God; and it would be more rational to sup- 
 pose that his deceiver, if he had it in his power, 
 would have afforded him every facility a fair wind 
 and smooth seas in carrying out his flight, even 
 beyond recovery. But, on the other hand, if it is 
 the Lord who holds the helm of affairs on the land, 
 and on the sea blow high, or blow low then it is 
 highly unreasonable to suppose that, as a general 
 thing, he will destroy his embassadors, whom he 
 has so impressively sent to the perishing nations of 
 the earth. Indeed, considering the multitude of 
 ministers who are passing and repassing on the seas, 
 instances of shipwreck are few and far between. 
 
 The case of the lamented Cookman stands out 
 from the general rule of Providence in bold contra- 
 distinction. He and his shipmates sank down in 
 one of the secret places of the Almighty; and the 
 attendant circumstances have not yet reached the 
 living. The sufferings of the crew and passengers, 
 in the face of death and eternity, might have been 
 sufficiently protracted to have admitted of serious 
 consideration, deep contrition, and faith unfeigned;
 
 GENERAL CONFEBENCE. 401 
 
 and, under the administrations of such an able 
 preacher, the most, if not all, of the sufferers might 
 have found their homes in heaven. If this was so, 
 who would not say that such a great salvation was 
 worthy of the sacrifice of the most unblemished of 
 our flock? Who would not say that God crowned 
 his seraphic ministry with a most triumphant close ? 
 As the disjointed steamer makes her last plunge, 
 methinks I see his released spirit bounding above 
 the foaming surface of the stormy deep, and, in its 
 homeward flight, carrying his last sheaves with him. 
 
 "Servant of God, well done!" 
 
 In the account of another steamship disaster, we 
 are told that many of the passengers were preserved 
 several days on the hurricane-deck. As the last 
 flickerings of hope began to withdraw from their 
 achipg bosoms, it was asked, in all the agony of 
 humbled nature, "Is there no Christian on board?" 
 One who had carried himself throughout the pas- 
 sage with a meek and lowly bearing, but, neverthe- 
 less, had his life hid with Christ in God, felt, 
 doubtless, something of that responsibility that our 
 Savior entertained, when the high-priest said, "I 
 adjure thee by the living God, tell us whether thou 
 be the Christ?" And he slowly rose up, and said, 
 "Friends, I am an unworthy servant of the Lord." 
 Scarcely had the last word fallen from his lips, before 
 he was surrounded by all the passengers, male and 
 female, imploring him to pray for their wretched
 
 402 THE CROSS. 
 
 souls. He fell on his knees, and the grace, the 
 unction, the fire of God's love which had been pent 
 up in his swelling bosom, like the flames of a labor- 
 ing volcano, burst forth in mighty irruptions of con- 
 fession, intercession, and praise. Mercy and light 
 came down; confidence in the providence of God 
 sprang up; a sweet serenity lighted up every coun- 
 tenance; holy purposes were formed, and the Lord, 
 in answer to prayer, soon delivered them out of all 
 their distress, and brought them to the desired 
 haven. Thus does the Lord often afford to his 
 ministers and people opportunities of working their 
 passage, by the salvation of souls, without destroy- 
 ing their bodies. 
 
 At other times the Lord displays to his preachers 
 his power and his glory, in forms in which they are 
 no where seen but in a storm at sea, that their 
 reverence may be deepened, their theology im- 
 proved, their imagination corrected, their souls 
 ballasted, and they better prepared to discourse of 
 the attributes of the Almighty and his marvelous 
 mercy to the children of men. 
 
 In the mean time, while we admit that the super- 
 stition of the sailors is fully as pious as the clair- 
 voyance, prescience, and witchcraft pretendedly con- 
 nected with animal magnetism and spiritual rap- 
 pings, still the fog must be swept away. The 
 "angels of the waters" are abroad and are at work. 
 The holy Gospel, like the mystic albatross feared 
 by the wicked, revered by the good is shedding
 
 GENERAL CONFERENCE. 403 
 
 its glorious light. And doubtless the time will 
 come when sailors will fear carrying blacklegs more 
 than carrying white horses will fear packs of cards 
 more than lots of Bibles will fear bar-keepers and 
 grog-bruisers more than Methodist preachers. Yea, 
 in the storm and in the calm, in life and in death, 
 they will know that all things shall work together 
 for good to them who love the Lord; to them who 
 are the called according to his purpose. 
 
 We pushed on toward Boston, expecting the city 
 was looking hard for us, as they had never had a 
 General Conference before; but when we put up at 
 our tavern we found no one knew, either the tav- 
 ern-keeper, lodgers, or attaches, where the Confer- 
 ence was to be held, or whether there was any such 
 thing as a General Conference. We looked sur- 
 prised at them, and they looked back, surprised at 
 our surprise. The tavern lodged, but did not feed 
 travelers. We got neat rooms, and were told that 
 whenever we felt like eating, there was a separate 
 establishment below, where we might be accommo- 
 dated. This was found to be a great advantage. 
 We were not obliged to pay for things we never 
 ate. We might breakfast at any hour from sun- 
 rise to noon; and dine any hour from noon to 
 night. If we had no appetite we might omit 
 breakfast, or dinner, or supper, or all three. We 
 might eat cheap things, or things costly, and we 
 made up the opinion, if a man only has where to 
 lay his head, he may live cheaper in Boston than he
 
 404 THE CROSS. 
 
 can any where else in town or country; but he 
 must pay as he goes no chance to swindle a week's 
 board. We, however, soon found our allotted 
 homes. It was my good providence to be placed 
 in a pious, intelligent, social family of the name of 
 Chandler. It is astonishing to myself that, in the 
 course of four or five weeks, I should have formed 
 such a tender attachment to a family I had never 
 seen before. But they have ever since had a place 
 in the catalogue of my friends and relatives. 
 
 On my first Sabbath it was in my way to prom- 
 enade the wharves. I can not express the tran- 
 quillity that pervaded my whole being, as I snuffed 
 up the most pleasant of all earth's effluvium the 
 aroma of the shipping; and as I turned a corner 
 where a large anchor best bower was planted in 
 the earth, I slapped its flukes with my hand with 
 so much affection and faith unfeigned, that it rasped 
 my whole constitution, and almost made me dance 
 Juba, as the negroes say; and tears of fond remem- 
 brance rolled down my cheeks. I preached in Bos- 
 ton and East Boston; but the happiest Sunday I 
 had was at Scituate, a place principally peopled 
 with sailors or those in connection with the sea. 
 Here, standing on a gentle hill, the whole coast 
 to my right could be seen almost to Cape Cod, 
 while before me spread out the blue sea. Vessels, 
 large and small, were coming in and going out, and 
 scenes of by-gone days swept over my mind, and 
 all the remembrances of youth beckoned me out;
 
 GENERAL CONFERENCE. 405 
 
 but my anchor was cast in the West. How strange 
 it is that the pleasurable excitements of the sea are 
 engraved on our mind, while its disasters and toils 
 have perished in the wake! This was also a day 
 of unusual religious enjoyment with myself, and I 
 believe with every body else. 
 
 The most exciting question of tKis General Con- 
 ference was the pew question. Our readers all 
 know the result. Whether it was in consequence 
 of the unusually-long railroad ride, or sedentary 
 work, or a return to our old delicious diet oysters 
 and fish I know not, I was extremely sluggish, 
 and, under commonplace debate, inclined to doze. 
 One day the brethren were debating about a bishop 
 for Africa. The great concern with them seemed 
 to be the fatality of the climate and the danger a 
 bishop would run in landing on the coast. We had 
 to listen to, what seemed to me, exaggerated ac- 
 counts of that horrid strip of earth, till I became 
 somewhat torpid and overpowered with something 
 which was part dreamy, part fanciful, and part a 
 morbid invention of the mind; and methought I 
 saw an American packet, backing and filling on the 
 coast of Africa. Then I saw a native pirogue come 
 out, and a letter sent on shore, announcing the 
 arrival of a Methodist bishop. I looked and beheld 
 a procession of colored brethren embark in a coast- 
 er, and making for the packet she laid her bowsprit 
 on the tafierel of the ship. Then I saw the candi- 
 dates shin out on the bowsprit, while the bishop
 
 406 THE CROSS. 
 
 touched their heads with the longest boat-hook on 
 board, and said, "Take thou authority," etc. Then 
 the captain cried out, "Fill away, boys! tail up for 
 Boston, the land of immortality and life, where 
 bishops never die!" I thought how many blas- 
 phemous sinners, for the mere sake of gain, had 
 explored the sickly rivers and putrefying fens of 
 Africa to steal or buy negroes, and had returned in 
 safety; and yet how doubtful we were about trust- 
 ing a bishop there for one week to do the work of 
 God! I was roused by indignation, and felt like 
 saying, if I could have slipped in a word, which I 
 could not, "Mr. President, I do not desire the 
 office of a bishop if I did, it would be no sin, as it 
 is a good work but if it could be made consistent 
 with our constitution to make me simply a nuncio 
 for six months, I will go to Africa, sit one week in 
 Conference, and ordain the preachers, and come 
 back, or Mary Lorrain shall be left a widow on the 
 banks of the Belle Riviere.' 11 
 
 The Conference being over we returned with 
 astonishing rapidity. At Buffalo I took a carriage 
 in the evening, in the midst of a thunder-storm, for 
 the steamer. A gentleman and his wife were with 
 me. I never heard a woman pray harder than she 
 did for her husband to wait till the next day. She 
 wept and declared that they were going as to the 
 slaughter. I could not blame her in view of the 
 ragged lightning and bursting thunder, that were 
 playing over our heads; but he told her that she
 
 GENERAL CONFERENCE. 407 
 
 was asking what was impossible, his trunks and 
 money were all on board. We got on board and 
 put out on the dark lake, in the hight of the storm. 
 After we had cleared the pier I went down in the 
 cabin. A preacher put his head out of a berth, 
 and said, 
 
 "0, here is brother Lorrain! I am so glad you 
 are come! Now I feel safe!" 
 
 "Brother," said I, "look here, don't pin your 
 faith on my sleeve. The Lord could drown me as 
 easy as any one on board." 
 
 "Yes," said he, "but you know how to manage 
 the thing." 
 
 I told him the boat was under the supervision of 
 the captain, and if he chose to drive her to ruin, I 
 would not rise in mutiny; but he need not be 
 alarmed, all was well. We soon resumed the cars, 
 and got to home sweet home. 
 
 I found that, in my absence, the spirit-rappers 
 had invaded my territory; but by the help of the 
 Lord, we soon laid them as far as the Church was 
 concerned. We had good times and large congre- 
 gations the whole year. The Lord bless Fulton, 
 and supply them with men of warm hearts and 
 sound minds!
 
 408 THE CROSS. 
 
 XXXIII. 
 BETHEL CAUSE. 
 
 1853-54. HAVING been solicited, for several 
 years, to take an active part in the "Western Sea- 
 men's Friend Society," I at last consented. The 
 principal work assigned me was to edit the " West- 
 ern Pilot," a paper exclusively devoted to the Soci- 
 ety. This work I attended to industriously for 
 two years, attending to all the work packing and 
 directing to upward of two thousand subscribers. 
 My Sabbath work was to assist the chaplain at the 
 floating Bethel, and to travel, preach on the subject, 
 make collections, and gather subscribers. I was 
 first solicited by brother Thomas Cooper to engage 
 in this work. He was a young minister of extra- 
 ordinary promise. 
 
 There is an opinion which is entertained by some 
 good members of the Church, which should be cor- 
 rected. It is thought that the Bethel cause is a 
 novelty one of the eccentric experiments which 
 the nineteenth century, fruitful in theories, has 
 rolled up-; and that its results are of doubtful dis- 
 putation. This view is very erroneous. Our enter- 
 prise is coexistent with Christianity itself. The 
 great High-Priest of our profession was, emphat-
 
 BETHEL CAUSE. 409 
 
 ically speaking, a Bethel minister. The ordinary 
 arena of his labor was the sea-shore. He who reads 
 the New Testament, keeping this assertion in sight, 
 will be surprised in noticing how much of our 
 Lord's ministry was about the lakes. Indeed, he 
 admitted it himself, in that solemn warning that he 
 gave to the towns and cities on their borders. He 
 made occasional excursions to Jerusalem, and else- 
 where; but we soon trace him back again to the 
 waters; and it is said, "And he began again to 
 teach by the seaside." He began again that is, he 
 returned to his accustomed field of labor. 
 
 Now, we contend that this course singular 'as it 
 was was most reasonable; and that it is no new 
 thing to preach on the sea-shore, or on the boats 
 and wharves. In all ages, the seas and the water- 
 courses have been in advance in wickedness, and 
 usually tend to corrupt more deeply the land; 
 therefore, there was both mercy and wisdom in our 
 Savior's labors to save first those who were nearest 
 to ruin. The prophet Esaias saw this beginning of 
 the Gospel, where he said, "The land of Zebulon, 
 and the land of Napthalim, by the way of the sea, 
 beyond Jordan, Galilee of the Gentiles: the people 
 that sat in darkness saw great light; and to those 
 which sat in the region and shadow of death, light 
 has sprung up." The waters still have a tendency 
 to corrupt the world, and will have till their 
 streams are purified by grace. When we send a 
 
 missionary to heathen lands, he not only preaches 
 
 35
 
 THE CROSS. 
 
 the incomparable doctrines of the Gospel, but insists 
 upon their purifying power. He shows that Chris- 
 tian faith works by love, and produces practical 
 holiness in those who believe. But presently a ship 
 comes into port bearing the flag of some Christian 
 nation. The natives now expect to see a community 
 of living saints. But when they see some of the 
 crew staggering along the beach, under the influ- 
 ence of intoxicating drink; when they see others 
 engaged in strife and bloody rows; when they see 
 others invading their family peace, corrupting the 
 youth, and spreading disgusting contagion through 
 their community; and above all, when they hear 
 the name of Christ, which the missionary has taught 
 them to venerate, blasphemed by those whom they 
 suppose to be his professed followers, their hopes 
 sink within them, and they begin to conclude that, 
 whatever may be the claims of the Gospel as a 
 theory, it is worthless in its results and they cling 
 with renewed tenacity to their old and time-hon- 
 ored superstitions. 
 
 We once heard a converted Indian telling a large 
 congregation of the dampening influence that the 
 conduct of wicked white men had on him, even 
 after he had admitted the truth of the Gospel, and 
 was earnestly seeking its consolations. But he ob- 
 served that in traveling through our settlements, he 
 had become satisfied on that point. He met with a 
 goodly number who practiced the virtues that his 
 missionary had preached; and he found that among
 
 BETHEL CAUSE. 411 
 
 both the white folks and Indians, it was only those 
 who obeyed the Gospel of Jesus Christ who felt its 
 power. But if we confine our observations to our 
 Western waters, who does not see their corrupting 
 influence? Why is it that wickedness prevails so 
 much more in our lake or river ports, than it does 
 in our rural or inland villages? Why is it that in 
 our great commercial cities the nearer you approach 
 our water streets, or wharves, the deeper you de- 
 scend among the haunts of sin? Here they have 
 their grog-shops, their screens, their brothels, and 
 unless the tide of iniquity, on the waters, is staid, 
 it will grow with the growth, and strengthen with 
 the strength of our ever-swelling population. In- 
 deed, when we look at the great marts of Europe, 
 such as London and Liverpool, we find whole streets 
 and alleys abandoned by the reputable, and given 
 up to dissipation, lasciviousness, and wantonness ; and 
 over these dreary wastes no Sabbath shines. Why 
 should we wonder that Christ began, and continued 
 during his mission, to preach on the sea-shore? 
 Why should we call this a new enterprise? 
 
 As it regards the results, they can not be of 
 doubtful cast; for our Savior was successful. The 
 people heard him gladly. They followed him up 
 and down, and around the coast, and frequently so 
 pressed upon him, that he had to enter into vessels, 
 in order to address the immense crowd that covered 
 the landing. When he entered into a house, it was 
 blockaded beyond ingress or egress. Many believed,
 
 412 THE CROSS. 
 
 and the Church of Christ was built up. He drew the 
 principal part of his apostles from the sea. When 
 the proud Pharisees said they were ignorant and 
 unlearned men, they meant no more than that they 
 were not scientific, or what we in our day would 
 call classical men. They doubtless had some educa- 
 tion, and were men of sound mind, good judgment, 
 bland disposition, and well furnished with natural 
 gifts, necessary to the ministry. They were the 
 best men, all things considered, that could be 
 selected out of the Christian Church at that time; 
 and that Church was a Bethel. Our Lord did not 
 mean to reflect on sanctified learning; for as soon 
 as the Church could afford it, he added to them 
 Saul of Tarsus, who helped them mightily. Our 
 Lord began on the sea, and we have no doubt he 
 will end there; for sailors are eminently calculated 
 to carry the Gospel to the ends of the earth. We 
 do not mean altogether as ministers proper. We 
 know that well-educated ministers are necessary to 
 head our missions; but God has reserved to himself 
 great missionary power in the membership. An 
 apostle says of them, " You are a chosen generation, 
 a royal priesthood!" Saul did, unintentionally, 
 great good while he was persecuting the saints; for 
 then the brethren were scattered every-where but 
 as they went they preached Jesus and the resurrec- 
 tion. These were laymen; for we are told that the 
 apostles stood their ground. God sent the member- 
 ship driving them before a gale of persecution.
 
 BETHEL CAUSE. 413 
 
 So God will send converted sailors to be, under 
 Christ, for salvation to the ends of the earth. He 
 will send them by the force of circumstances, by 
 love to their families, by a sense of the duty of 
 providing for their own, by an undying attachment 
 to their profession, on voyages the most distant and 
 adventurous, and wherever they touch they will 
 leave a savor of life unto life. A learned ministry 
 will have the advantage in some respects the 
 sailor-laity in others. Sailors are physically supe- 
 rior; they have passed through all kinds of calms 
 and storms, sunshine and frost, and their constitu- 
 tions have become acclimated to every latitude. 
 They will not stand before the heathen with eyes 
 almost destroyed by the midnight lamp, and each 
 with a pair of green spectacles on his nose. They 
 will not whisper with a voice rendered almost in- 
 audible by pulmonary weakness; but standing on 
 the uncovered deck, will lift up their voice like a 
 trumpet, and show the people their transgression, 
 and the idolatrous natives their sins. Again, sailors 
 are superior in experience. The learned minister is 
 needed, and so is the experienced layman. Those 
 who are educated for the ministry go into the col- 
 lege about seventeen or eighteen years of age. 
 They come out in ripened manhood. All this 
 brightest part of their lives they have been ex- 
 cluded, in a measure, from the world; and what do 
 they know of men, matters, and things? It is not 
 BO with the adventurous Christian sailor. He ha3
 
 414 THE CROSS. 
 
 been compelled to study human nature, in all its 
 eccentric windings. He has marked it in its various 
 working, in different positions, and under multiform 
 circumstances; and he is able to pencil down the 
 sinner's presumptuous cruise, with all its traverse 
 sailing, backing and filling, and to rout him out of 
 every hidden cove, and refuges of lies, till his sins 
 become hateful, and he flies from himself to a sin- 
 pardoning God. 
 
 But what do we mean by thus magnifying our 
 work? Do we mean that the voice of the Lord is 
 heard only on the waters, and that our brethren 
 of the interior should forsake their comfortable 
 tabernacles, and come down to pray with us on the 
 sea-shore? No; but we do mean to battle the idea 
 that our undertaking is a new thing. When some 
 are solicited to lend a hand, they look wondrously 
 wild, and say, "Why, brother, this is a new thing. 
 We have never heard of it before; it has not been 
 spread before our people before, and we must take 
 time to consider." What! have we never heard of 
 Christ preaching on the shores of Galilee; of his 
 being pressed by the multitudes so as to be driven 
 on board a ship, and being put to the necessity of 
 shoving off from the shore and dropping anchor, lest 
 the vessed should be swamped by the multitude 
 crowding to hear the Word of Life? Have we 
 never heard of his crossing and recrossing the lake, 
 of the sailing, and rowing, and racing of vessels and 
 boats to overtake him in his itinerant career?
 
 BETHEL CAUSE. 415 
 
 Have we never heard of his excursion to the sea- 
 coast of Tyre and Sidon? Indeed, the greater part 
 of the Gospel scenery is laid about the sea and the 
 adjoining coasts. And we claim that the Bethel 
 work is not new, as far as its essence is concerned. 
 Then we claim that no cloud of uncertainty can rest 
 upon the result. Our Lord did not labor as one 
 beating the air a great company believed. The 
 Bethel ministers do not now spend their strength 
 for naught. Where is the Church in Boston that is 
 accomplishing more than the mariners' Churches? 
 Where is the Church that is doing more permanent 
 good than the Norwegian Bethel and others in New 
 York? Here in the West much has been done on 
 the lakes, the rivers, the canals, and much more 
 will be done when the means of the Seamen Friend 
 society become more ample. But the crowning argu- 
 ment on this head that which should sweep away 
 every vestige of mist from all minds is the declara- 
 tion of the Bible. 
 
 "The abundance of the sea shall be converted 
 unto thee." Here that which is the duty of our 
 citizens is also their interest, and should, therefore, 
 be their delight the regeneration of our waters is 
 the salvation of the land. The bread that is cast 
 upon them will be found after many days. 
 
 The character of the sailor is but partially under- 
 stood by the bulk of mankind, especially that por- 
 tion of it that dwells in the interior districts. 
 When the sailor comes rolling along through the
 
 416 THE CROSS. 
 
 country, he is regarded as a rare curiosity. His 
 language, his gait, his habitudes are closely scanned ; 
 and his manner of operating, although generally 
 founded on the true philosophy of things, and con- 
 sequently strictly correct, is often a subject-matter 
 of ridicule. But Jack smiles at their botheration 
 in coiling against the sun, is diverted at their com- 
 ing down their scuttles face foremost, instead of 
 bear-fashion, laughs heartily at their granny-knots, 
 and passes on in perfect good-humor. It is, more- 
 over, thought by many that, 'bating the dangers 
 and occasional disasters to which seamen are ex- 
 posed, their vocation is One of extraordinary pleas- 
 ure and indolence. It is true that there are times 
 and seasons when the profession is pleasant and 
 even fascinating; but this state of things is liable 
 to sudden and grievous interruptions. The sailor 
 expects them, and his mind is at all times braced 
 sharp up for a sudden transition from a state of rest 
 and ease to labors the most arduous and sufferings 
 the most extreme. Indeed, there is something in 
 the unparalleled and terrific grandeur of the strip- 
 ping gale, in connection with the pride of profes- 
 sion, that makes the sailor's heart swell with bound- 
 less ambition. And when the seas and skies appear 
 to be tumbled into lawless and sublime confusion, 
 he feels glad that he is there, and is proud to 
 consider himself a necessary item in the driving 
 tempest. Then it is that he is prepared for deeds 
 of mighty daring. "We doubt, indeed, whether
 
 BETHEL CAUSE. 417 
 
 there is any thing in all the pomp of war, the 
 rattling of the martial drum, the clangor of the 
 rousing trumpet, the roaring of cannon, the moment- 
 ous vibrations of mighty empires poised in the 
 scales of battle, which can rouse the ambition of 
 mortal man, as the warring elements and rushing, 
 white-crested billows rouse the ambition of the 
 sailor. 
 
 " With such mad seas the daring Gama fought 
 For many a day, and many a dreadful night, 
 Incessant, laboring round the stormy Cape." 
 
 There are often severe hardships endured in the 
 ordinary merchant-service. We have been some- 
 times, for weeks off the coast of America, contend- 
 ing with driving gales, and adverse winds, accom- 
 panied with alternate showers of rain and snow; 
 compelled to shift our clothes till not a dry garment 
 could be found in the forecastle. In the mean time 
 the wind would fall and rise continually, so as to 
 keep the hands employed all the time in making 
 and taking in sail. Often have we retired from the 
 watch with our clothes soaking wet, tumbled, ex- 
 hausted, into the berth, and under our friendly 
 blankets, we have soon fallen into a delightful 
 hydrological sweat; but still tormented with the 
 idea that every moment we might hear the cry of 
 "all hands ahoy!" while the indisputable certainty 
 of having to bundle up at the expiration of four 
 hours, diffused its bitterness through all our dreams. 
 But what is all this in comparison with the suffer-
 
 418 THE CROSS. 
 
 ings endured in other departments of sea service 
 the exploring expeditions? True, these are few and 
 far between, and are sometimes of fatal termination ; 
 their distress, perhaps, far exceeding the fancy of 
 a British poet, although that is sufficiently doleful: 
 
 " Miserable they ! who, here entangled in the gathering ice, 
 Take their last look of the descending sun, 
 While, full of death, and fierce with tempest frost, 
 The long, long night, incumbent o'er their heads, 
 Falls horrible. Such was the Briton's fate, 
 As with first prow what have not Britons dared? 
 He for the passage sought, attempted since 
 So much in vain, and seeming to be shut 
 By jealous Nature with eternal bars, 
 In these fell regions in Arzina caught, 
 And to the stormy deep his idle ship 
 Immediate sealed, he with his hapless crew, 
 Each full exerted at his several task, 
 Froze into statues; to the cordage glued 
 The sailor, and the pilot to the helm." 
 
 Multitudes engaged in the whale-fisheries pass 
 through labors more severe, sufferings as intense. 
 We have been speaking of the enterprise and pro- 
 verbial endurance of seamen in general, without 
 regard to national distinction. The Dutch, at an 
 early period, were preeminent in naval enterprise. 
 The English, at a later day, became famous. But 
 we must say it and we likely would say it, if only 
 an emigrant of yesterday on these shores that 
 American seamen, in this day, are rather in ad- 
 vance of all others in point of enterprise and marine 
 daring. 
 
 As early as the year 1775, the Americans had
 
 BETHEL CAUSE. 419 
 
 more ships engaged in whaling than England, 
 France, and Holland combined. Four thousand 
 American sailors were then employed in this work. 
 Mr. Burke, in speaking of the colonies in that day, 
 holds this highly-complimentary language : 
 
 "Look at the manner in which the people of 
 New England have of late carried on the whale- 
 fishery. While we follow them among the trembling 
 mountains of ice, and behold them penetrating into 
 the deepest recesses of Hudson's Bay and Davis's 
 Straits, while we are looking for them beneath 
 the Arctic circle, we hear that they have pierced 
 into the opposite region of polar cold that they 
 are at the antipodes, and engaged under the frozen 
 Serpent of the South. Falkland Island, which 
 seemed too remote and romantic an object for the 
 grasp of national ambition, is but a stage and rest- 
 ing-place in the progress of their victorious indus- 
 try. Nor is the equatorial heat more discouraging 
 to them than the accumulated Winter of both the 
 poles. We know that, while some of them draw 
 the line and strike the harpoon on the coast of 
 Africa, others run the longitude, and pursue their 
 gigantic game along the coast of Brazil. No ocean 
 but what is vexed with their fisheries no climate 
 that is not witness to their toils. Neither the per- 
 severance of Holland, nor the activity of France, 
 nor the dexterous and firm sagacity of English en- 
 terprise ever carried this perilous mode of hardy 
 enterprise to the extent to which it has been pushed
 
 420 THE CEOSS. 
 
 by this recent people a people who are still, as it 
 were, in the gristle, and not yet hardened into the 
 bone of manhood." 
 
 The American sailor is also superior in naval 
 warfare. We do not mean that he is hardier or 
 more fearless than the British tar. It is enough, 
 in these particulars, that the children be as their 
 fathers. But there are circumstances *of national 
 usages and complexion that raise the American 
 above his fellows, as there are peculiarities that 
 damp the ardor of the English man-of-war's man. 
 
 First. The latter is generally in a forced service. 
 The merchantman sailor returns from the East or 
 West Indies with his well-earned shiners in his fob. 
 He hears that the press is hot, and, with all the 
 stealthy caution of a runaway slave, he attempts, 
 perhaps under cover of night, to reach his happy 
 home; but often, in sight of his own cottage lights, 
 he is seized by an unfeeling press-gang, and hurried 
 on board a tender. There are no family circum- 
 stances, however tender, that can move compassion 
 in the bosom of his captors. He is taken into serv- 
 ice; and when the day of battle comes, his sailor 
 hardihood, the severity of the service, the force be- 
 fore, the force behind equalize what of fear may re- 
 main, and he faces the dreadful music, but feels but 
 little concern as it regards the victory or the defeat. 
 
 With the American sailor it is otherwise. His 
 may be called voluntary service. True, he may 
 have taken the bounty while "half-seas-over;" but
 
 BETHEL CAUSE. 421 
 
 he lays the principal part of that indiscretion to 
 himself, and soon makes up his mind to bear up for 
 the two-year service. He goes on board with a full 
 determination to sustain the honor of his flag; and 
 in the day of trial he fights desperately. 
 
 Second. The English service is generally cruel 
 and degrading, to a proverb. The frequent music 
 of the lash brutalizes the unhappy sufferers till the 
 dignity of manhood is all gone. Their pride of 
 country is drained drop by drop, till their blood 
 refuses to redden their brow at the sight of an ap- 
 proaching frigate. How can it be otherwise ? Who 
 can be proud of a country that delights to make 
 the long furrows of slavery on his back? Indeed, 
 they can not repress the idea that their worst ene- 
 mies are those of their own ship. They stand, and 
 go through all the evolutions of a battle, of course; 
 but they care not how soon the cannons cease to 
 roar, and they are permitted to enjoy the hospital- 
 ities of prisoners of war. There is less barbarity in 
 our navy, and our men are not so deeply degraded. 
 So far as we copy the example of England in this 
 respect, it only works evil to our service. 
 
 The voluntary entrance of our seamen, the short- 
 ness of the service, the mildness of discipline, all 
 conspire to buoy them up in their place; so that 
 each man, in the tumult of battle, not only obeys 
 the orders of his officers, but, so far as may be 
 consistent with them, exercises his own personal 
 knowledge and skill in dealing his blows on the
 
 422 THE CROSS. 
 
 enemy, so that he is soon dismantled, and compelled 
 to strike. There is much in this. Officers might 
 give orders for every thing to be done, which might 
 lead to a favorable result; but, after all, the man- 
 ner of doing them is more than half the battle. 
 We know that the fear of disgrace, or the lash, 
 might make things move like clock-work on board 
 a frigate, but then the movement is servile, and not 
 intelligent an empty parade, destitute of that pa- 
 triotism that swells the freeman's breast. It would 
 be an easy matter for a slave, at the word of com- 
 mand, to point a cannon, and for another to apply 
 the match; but American sailors, at the word of 
 command, not only point the gun and apply the 
 match, but they do all as experienced engineers who 
 feel an interest in the result. 
 
 The Last War with England, although short, 
 demonstrated the superior tact of our sailors in 
 naval combat. Our Government, doubtless, glories 
 in the fact. But would it not add additional luster 
 to our stars, if it could be said that, while Ameri- 
 can* sailors excel in valor, in skill, in patriotism, 
 they excel also in civility, in morality yea, in pure 
 and undefiled religion? Many in our merchant 
 service have availed themselves of the watch below 
 in improving their original stock of knowledge. 
 Others, who were supremely ignorant, have learned 
 to read. What might be done in our navy, by way 
 of training our seamen in all that is great and glo- 
 rious !
 
 COLLEGE AGENCY. 423 
 
 XXXIV. 
 
 COLLEaE AGENCY MILFORD AND BA- 
 TAVIA CIRCUITS. 4 
 
 COLLEGE AGENCY. 
 
 1855. WE received an appointment as Agent for 
 the Hillsboro Female College. As we were entering 
 on this work some of the banks in Cincinnati broke, 
 and many of the citizens of Highland county had 
 deposited their money in them. This gave us a 
 considerable backset. The first thing that struck 
 me was, that the town people had not given the 
 enterprise as generous a heading as they ought to 
 have done. Of this the county complained, and we 
 made known their complaints. At a subsequent 
 meeting the citizens liberally enlarged their sub- 
 scriptions, and we went forth with more boldness. 
 
 I felt a very deep interest in the institution, and 
 thought that it would become the most famous of 
 all our female schools. A preacher will say, "Yes, 
 every brother thinks for the time being that his 
 own appointment is the great work; and it is well 
 that he can so think." We have, however, reasons 
 above all this. The location is perhaps unparal- 
 leled in point of health. We still hope that the
 
 424 THE CROSS. 
 
 embarrassment of the institution will be, by some 
 means, thrown off, and that it will rise up to the 
 high destiny of which it is worthy. The subscrip- 
 tion, when handed to me, amounted to about four 
 thousand, six hundred dollars. That year, by en- 
 largement of old subscriptions, and additional sub- 
 scriptions, and shares sold, it was increased to about 
 twelve thousand dollars. Although I helped at Con- 
 ference to thank a brother for raising four hundred 
 dollars for another school, by a rising vote, yet I 
 was blessed I expected nothing of this kind; and 
 I got nothing. I never could understand why a 
 Conference should thank an agent for doing the 
 work assigned him, any more than they should 
 thank a preacher for doing the work of a circuit. 
 It is not in harmony with our theological hym- 
 nology 
 
 "0 that each in the day of his coming may say, 
 
 I have fought my way through; 
 I have finished the work thou didst give me to do." 
 
 Indeed, it is hardly in keeping with our prosaic 
 faith, if we hold to Wesley, who said, "Learning is 
 good, but saving souls is better." Still the agent 
 may do this. We attended several large meetings 
 one in particular, where we made a good haul for 
 the College, and where, we humbly hoped, we helped 
 to save souls. If we did, we trust the Lord has 
 recorded it. 
 
 I pretty well explored the county, sold a number 
 of shares, and got many promises for the future;
 
 MILFOED CIRCUIT. 425 
 
 some of which I might have realized by continuing 
 in that work, but my tenacious disorder forbade. 
 So, in order to better my condition in regard to 
 laborious riding, I "jumped out of the frying-pan 
 into the fire." 
 
 . ', T,ffc.r .-.'-H? !>_' V T- 
 
 MILFOED CIECUIT. 
 
 1856. We have a warm feeling for this circuit, 
 because there are many of the members who have a 
 just regard for temperance and all Christian graces. 
 And those of them who have been unfortunately 
 involved in the still-commerce, are in other respects 
 good Methodists. They are warmly attached to our 
 doctrines and usages, and firm defenders of our gov- 
 ernment, and in no instance have they risen in op- 
 position to the Episcopacy. 
 
 They are strong against the frivolous fashions of 
 the day, and seem as if they would die in defense 
 of the customs of the fathers. Nevertheless, the 
 chief labor of their lives has been in sustaining the 
 distillery. And while they continue to do so, there 
 is a part of the community who will never embark 
 the welfare of their souls in the Methodist Church. 
 We may have, from year to year, an ingathering 
 of attaches of the distillery, or of Sunday school 
 children, who have from infancy seen the dark col- 
 umn of smoke rolling over their heads, as regularly 
 as the sun, and have never questioned its origin or 
 end. And we are glad that such are accessible. 
 
 But we will never assume that high position there 
 
 36
 
 426 THE CROSS. 
 
 which the early organization of that society de- 
 serves, till the Church washes her hands of that 
 iniquity. It has ever been a rule in our ministry 
 to preach against the special sins of that division 
 of the work to which we have been appointed. 
 What would it avail to preach on the Blue Ridge 
 against a sin of some seaport say smuggling-^-or 
 to preach in Vermont against the sin of raising 
 Indian corn for the distilleries? I can not conceive 
 of the feeling of the minister who can serve a 
 Church a whole year, and never touch on a beset- 
 ting sin in that Church. 
 
 When I came to the circuit it was a serious ques- 
 tion with me, " What must I dof" I saw clearly 
 that among a people who seemed, in many important 
 points, to love Methodism, I could shape my course 
 so as to be acceptable, if not popular. But could 
 I take this course and clear my skirts? I finally 
 concluded before the Lord to do my duty, if it 
 brought me on short allowance. Still I intended to 
 defer my battle till the people had got well ac- 
 quainted with me; for I believed I had some good 
 points as well as they. 
 
 In the mean time Thanksgiving day was ap- 
 proaching, and a brother requested me to give no- 
 tice that there would be preaching on that day. I 
 asked him who would preach. He said, "Never 
 mind; somebody will." So I gave it out, supposing 
 he was going to get some one from the city. When 
 the day arrived there were at first very few at the
 
 MILFORD CIECUIT. 427 
 
 meeting-house. I said, "Brother, you will have a 
 small congregation to preach to." 
 
 "You must preach." 
 
 "I had rather not. You never told me that it 
 was expected for me to preach; and, besides, the 
 occasion, thanksgiving, might lead me to say some- 
 thing that might hurt the good feelings of some." 
 
 "0, never fear. We are a people who can not 
 be hurt, if you preach the truth." 
 
 "God forbid we should preach any thing else!" 
 
 Presently we had a large congregation, and nearly 
 all those of the traffic. They listened with the most 
 profound attention, although I touched upon the sins 
 of the nation, and especially drunkenness; for they 
 love to see the drunkard, as a poor, singed goat, 
 bear off the iniquity. But, toward the close, I 
 called their attention to the thanksgiving. This 
 was not the sermon; indeed, in many places, no 
 sermon was preached. The thanksgiving is in the 
 devotional exercises to follow. We must acknowl- 
 edge the great mercies of God- bewail our misim- 
 provement promise for the future. I then observed 
 that I was at a great loss about framing a prayer 
 suitable to all present, for two classes are here; 
 and, after a pause, said, I believe I will make two 
 prayers. Then each member may make his choice, 
 and carry it home. The first prayer might be 
 something like this: "0 Lord, we acknowledge our 
 great obligations to thank thee for the mercies of 
 the past year a year of unusual plenty. Our pas-
 
 428 THE CROSS. 
 
 tures are green and luxurious; our bottoms are 
 bursting up with potatoes ; plenty reigns around us. 
 We see it is our duty, after providing for our own 
 household, to be generous to the poor, to sustain the 
 missions, the Bible, Sunday school, and tract socie- 
 ties, and to do all the good we can with our abundant 
 means. Amen, and amen." The other might run 
 thus: "0 Lord, it has been a year of uncommon 
 plenty. Our bottoms are crowded with corn, and 
 all the fruits of the earth are abundant. We feel 
 grateful, and mean to apply these blessings as we 
 have ever done. We will haul our wood to the 
 furnace, and our corn to the great crib, and help 
 to stir up the fires of the distillery; and we will 
 send down such a stream of blue-ruin as we have 
 never raised before. We know that, in so doing, 
 we will have a hard row to hoe; our own sons may 
 get to crooking their elbows too often. Then 
 friends, family, and fortune will all go; then will 
 come delirium tremens, insanity, death and, last 
 of all, the drunkard's hell; but we will say, with 
 Hezekiah, ' truth and peace will be in our day. ' 
 Nay-men, and nay-men." 
 
 About six months after, some said my last prayer 
 did not suit them. But I told them, whether it 
 suited them or not, they had fulfilled all that I had 
 promised the Lord for them. They had carried all 
 their corn and wood to the distillery, and, in so 
 doing, they had chosen that prayer. From that 
 time to the close of the year, I paid due attention
 
 MILFORD CIRCUIT. 429 
 
 to the northern institution. Still, brother Fitch 
 and myself took in about seventy-five new members 
 on the circuit. We presented the following report 
 on the subject of Temperance, at Conference: 
 
 Your Committee are compelled to admit, that, of 
 late, there has been an increasing declension of the 
 general temperance reformation. It is no uncommon 
 thing now to see what has seldom been seen for the 
 last twenty years the sparkling and seducing de- 
 canter, unvailed, in our wedding and social parties, 
 and ladies, yet in their teens, sipping, with shame- 
 less sang froid, what would craze a genuine teeto- 
 taler. In our national anniversaries and public 
 banquets the old, barbarous custom of toasting 
 ourselves sick, out of tender regard for the health 
 of others, is greatly reviving; and the more scien- 
 tifically liquors have been analyzed, and the more 
 nakedly their ingredients have been turned up to 
 the noonday sun, the more thirsty the intemperate 
 seem for the ruinous draught. Our post-offices 
 the purity of which ought to be dear to every 
 American citizen are thrown too often into grog- 
 geries and dens of drunkenness, where females and 
 children can not approach without being exposed to 
 blasphemies and sickening exhibitions of human de- 
 pravity. Our Church has always cooperated with 
 every institution laboring to establish national and 
 social Temperance in our land; but during the 
 whole fight we have not neglected our own con-
 
 430 THE CROSS. 
 
 cern the lodge of Methodism so that, notwith- 
 standing the increase of our membership, we have 
 at this time less to do with intoxicating spirits 
 than we ever had. 
 
 With great delight we state that the cause of 
 Temperance in the Methodist Episcopal Church has 
 been continuous, onward, onward, from our organ- 
 ization. 
 
 " Bent on purpose grand and glorious, 
 Her banners move in course victorious." 
 
 The experience of many years has confirmed us 
 in the doctrine, that the religious reformation of 
 the drunkard is the most reliable the most per- 
 manent. Lorenzo Dow used to say that there were 
 but two specifics in the case: one was to put an 
 eel in a quart of rum, and drink generously; the 
 other was the grace of God. "We never had any 
 faith in his eel-bounce; but the grace of God we 
 can label, "Tried." 
 
 We know of only one medium now in connection 
 with the Church and still-house: "That corn!" 0, 
 that corn! Some of our folks are still engaged in 
 that wicked and disreputable commerce. Our 
 brethren who may not have been thrown where 
 Satan's choice seats are may not be initiated into 
 the modus operandi. As soon as you approach 
 such a place, the black temple of Copper Nosey 
 looms up, like nothing else but the back door of 
 hell. As you advance you will encounter a toper 
 in almost every square, all in different stages of
 
 MILFOED CIRCUIT. 431 
 
 progress. One is quite good-natured, and comfort- 
 ably "how came ye so?" Another is raging and 
 declaiming as if he were the Emperor of the Moon. 
 A third is peaceably sleeping on the sidewalk, with 
 his cheek slapped up against a curb-stone 
 
 " The flies creeping in, and the flies creeping out, 
 And sporting his eyes and his nostrils about." 
 
 But here conies a team, superannuated and gaunt, 
 and behind, mounted on a pyramid of corn, high 
 and dignified, sits an exhorter, or, it may be, a local 
 preacher. Our preacher dares not pass the last- 
 mentioned case. He has a commission from the 
 Church, and reins up, and, descending from his 
 high estate, he roots the drunkard over with his 
 muddy boot, and says, "Halloo, here! are you not 
 ashamed to be lying here, dead drunk, in open day- 
 light?" 
 
 The drunkard drawls out, "Ashamed enough! 
 but you brought me to it!" 
 
 "How can you make that out?" 
 
 "Why, you carry your corn to the distillery; 
 they make the sparkling whisky; I drink, and 
 become fuddled; but you are 'the great first cause, 
 least understood.'" 
 
 The drunkard rolls back on his curb pillow; the 
 preacher drives on, lamenting the wickedness of 
 these degenerate days, but scowls defiance at every 
 Templar, Son, or Daughter he may meet. 
 
 The preacher in charge says, " I '11 have a big
 
 432 THE CROSS. 
 
 meeting; that I will." "Do so," say the pious; for, 
 as it was of old, so now there are some, even in 
 Sardis, who have not defiled their garments. The 
 meeting comes on; several are powerfully convicted; 
 the big tears course down their cheeks; but still 
 they come not. A friend says, "Try them another 
 night; try them once more only once more;" and 
 so from week to week; but they come not. When 
 you get their only reason why, it is, "We can not 
 come and be surrounded, and talked to, and prayed 
 with, by those who are living, as we believe, in 
 mortal sin." The preacher sees that there is a class 
 of people around which Methodism can never reach, 
 till she washes her hands of this iniquity. He sees 
 that he must battle the whole watch with the mon- 
 ster. Perhaps one may be ready to say, as Peter, 
 "And what shall we have, therefore?" Truly, that 
 is a question. Surely, you will have hard times, 
 and may have to eat your own horse; but we hope 
 that, in the spirit of martyrdom, you will say, " Let 
 a hundred horses be devoured; but let the Church 
 of Grod swing free." 
 
 "But," says another, "is there no one to whom 
 we can look for help in this age of reformation?" 
 You will have to gather instruction from behind 
 the reformation. A pious Catholic woman was seen^ 
 weeping on the street. A passenger inquired what 
 was the matter. "0, sir," said she, "I have lost 
 my crucifix, and now I have nothing to pray to but 
 Jesus Christ!" You must not lean on the outsiders,
 
 MILFOED CIRCUIT. 433 
 
 though temperate they be. They will look compla- 
 cently on, and be highly diverted, like the frontier 
 mother who stood in her cabin door and beheld, 
 with a smile, her husband engaged in mortal com- 
 bat with a huge bear. When the hunter had gained 
 the victory, with the skin of his teeth, he upbraided 
 his wife for not coming down to his rescue, and 
 especially for smiling at the blood and sweat he had 
 shed. She coolly replied that she had never seen a 
 fight before in which she felt so little interest, as it 
 regarded who might whip. Funds they have, but 
 they must go for ice-cream, and oyster suppers, and 
 picnics, and costly music, so that the inebriates say 
 they have only changed the complexion of intem- 
 perance, and are like unto a man who boasts highly 
 of having quit tobacco chewing, but, nevertheless, 
 smokes like a locomotive. 
 
 Brethren, the minister of God has a work to do 
 in temperance that none other will or can do. His 
 temperance is not only a human virtue, but a 
 Christian grace; not only the temperance that 
 rejects manifest poison, but "temperance in all 
 things." He admires and indorses the temperance 
 that won Cyrus an empire; but he strikes for that 
 temperance at which God has priced the crown in- 
 corruptible. Our preachers, however, have much to 
 encourage them. 
 
 1. We know some who once traded with the 
 distillery who have abandoned it as a loathsome 
 
 thing, and we believe they would suffer martyr- 
 
 37
 
 434 THE CROSS. 
 
 dom before they would be driven back to the 
 practice. 
 
 2. Others are in a transit state. When we speak 
 to them on the subject, they will smile and say, 
 "Well, in truth, I do not like the business. I have 
 thought some about quitting; but I can not see my 
 way exactly clear just now, and for the present will 
 have to do as I have done." We here bless God, 
 and take courage. It requires only a little more 
 effort to capsize a cake already half turned, and our 
 late President Taylor said, in a similar case, "A 
 little more grape, Captain Bragg!" 
 
 3. The best is, no Methodist believes in whisky- 
 growing. Those who contend for the practice never 
 advance one argument that half satisfies themselves. 
 The discerning minister always discovers in them 
 evident marks of painful conviction, and their whole 
 demeanor but forcibly declares, 
 
 " We know the right, but still the wrong pursue." 
 
 "Then," it may be asked, "why do they do it?" 
 We answer, There is a sin that underlies the whole 
 transaction a sin as fatal to the soul as drunken- 
 ness covetoiisness. All Methodist farmers would 
 prefer a clean trade, all things being equal; but the 
 offer of two cents more on the bushel, or the paltry 
 expense of toll, determines the will, and drives the 
 wagon to the still-house; and it is notorious that 
 the most wealthy among them are penurious to a 
 proverb. They stick to the poll-tax which the
 
 MILFORD CIRCUIT. 435 
 
 stewards adopt in their estimate; and they seem to 
 think that it is the duty of the preacher be he 
 rich or be he poor to bear one-half of the expenses 
 of their wealthy circuits. If they can not come out 
 of his pocket they must come out of his horse or 
 his hide ; for the doctrine is stereotyped on the cere- 
 brum and cerebellum, "The leaner the hound the 
 swifter the chase." 
 
 So we find, without elaborate search, that the 
 idolatry of covetousness is the jackal of the still- 
 house. When this calm and settled avarice is lashed 
 into a tempest by the preaching of temperance, it 
 becomes doubly distilled, and threats of starvation 
 fall thick and heavy.. True, they sometimes make 
 a benevolent effort, when they go through the proc- 
 ess of what is called, in those parts, "buying up 
 the preacher" a donation call. The preacher may 
 be entirely ignorant of the design; but, whether he 
 is or not, he will have the extreme mortification, 
 when he comes to the footing of his quarterage, to 
 find that he has been made to buy up himself, 
 besides making presents to his own wife and chil- 
 dren of some pretty toys, which smile in contrast 
 with the furniture of the parsonage, but which will 
 by no means make the pot boil. 
 
 What is the conclusion? 
 
 1. There is not a shadow of doubt resting on this 
 body in regard to the man who stands day by day 
 at his bar, dealing out poison and death to his 
 neighbors' children, destroying the peace of families,
 
 THE CROSS. 
 
 and inciting to desperate deeds, and ofttimes bloody 
 murder. He is wicked his act immoral. 
 
 2. Neither do you entertain a doubt concerning 
 the merchant who supplies him, and is accessory; 
 for if the first serves Baal a little, he serves him a 
 great deal. He is not only a co-worker with that 
 retailer, but with a hundred others, so that his 
 guilt is out at compound interest. His standing 
 partially behind the screen avails nothing. His 
 bread and butter depend on the diligence with 
 which his customers retail their drams. And in 
 the same proportion he lays up gold and silver, he 
 treasures up wrath against the day of wrath. His 
 trade is immoral. 
 
 3. We need not say you have no doubts about 
 the distiller. He has none about himself, and com- 
 monly he evinces no desire to rob any evangelical 
 Church of livery to serve the devil in. His great- 
 est claim on mercy is he is no hypocrite. Never- 
 theless, he is immoral. 
 
 4. The whisky-growing farms are the only avail- 
 able arsenals of the vast army of intemperance, and 
 the Methodist farmers who cultivate them, make it 
 their business to roll the ammunition down to the 
 nearest magazine of woe, and on the 23d or 25th 
 of November offer thanksgiving to Almighty God 
 for the abundant harvest of spiritual grape and 
 canister. Now, neither the distiller nor the vend- 
 er could carry on their work of desolation without 
 the cultivator. So he has the unenviable distinction
 
 MILFORD CIECUIT. 437 
 
 of setting this vast machinery of insanity and death 
 in motion. And if he who putteth the bottle to 
 his neighbor's mouth is bending under the curse of 
 the Almighty, what must we say of those mischiev- 
 ous commissaries who keep that bottle supplied 
 with an inexhaustible stream of anguish and ruin? 
 True, they plead their own cause; but who does 
 not? But their two main points of defense are so 
 weak that we can hardly attribute them to the in- 
 stigation of the devil. 
 
 1. They say that whisky is made for medical 
 purposes. But we answer that no conscientious 
 and intelligent physician, in view of the late analy- 
 sis of Ohio whisky, would prescribe it even for the 
 bots. It is wicked to follow a business that does 
 more harm than good to our world. 
 
 2. If every drop of it is made for medical pur- 
 poses, still the world would breathe easier in the 
 absence of a medicine which alternately saves one 
 and kills a thousand. 
 
 3. Allowing all that is claimed, that the still is 
 the sovereign specific, the fountain of health and 
 immortality the long-sought spring of Ponce de 
 Leon still this does not enter into the motives of 
 our self-deceived brethren; because there is no 
 medical benevolence in selling corn for forty cents 
 per bushel to the distillery, while people in honest 
 trade are giving only thirty-five. The same breth- 
 ren clothe the naked every day when they rise, and 
 feed the hungry every time they eat. They quote
 
 438 THE CROSS. 
 
 often this passage: "Give strong drink to him who 
 is ready to perish;" but neither will this meet their 
 case. It is no benevolence in times of scarcity to 
 give four gallons of whisky to him who is ready to 
 perish with thirst, and by so doing take away a 
 bushel of corn from him who is ready to perish 
 with hunger. And, besides, they do not give at 
 all, but sell at an advanced price. And this is 
 their crying sin, that they sell corn to those who 
 sell it in whisky, not only to the sober, but to 
 those who are truly ready to perish perhaps the 
 finishing dose. 
 
 4. They are concerned about no other medicine. 
 If whisky will not cure, the sick may go to the 
 grave. They do not grow rhubarb, poppies, nor even 
 lobelia. The other main point is necessity. What 
 shall we do with "that corn?" "How shall we 
 cultivate our land to profit?" We need not meet 
 this defense before a body of men so well acquainted 
 with our agricultural prosperity, the high price of 
 provisions, and the countless mouths to be fed in 
 this country. 
 
 Finally, we feel driven, logically and conscien- 
 tiously, to present the following resolutions for the 
 consideration of the Conference: 
 
 1. Resolved, That it is irreligious for our mem- 
 bers to hold commerce with distilleries, saving such 
 as distill exclusively for medical and mechanical 
 purposes. 
 
 2. Resolved, As a ministerial body, in our place,
 
 BATAVIA CIKCUIT. 439 
 
 we do approve of our ministers preaching against 
 the above evil it is their duty to do so. 
 
 3. Hesolved, We do most affectionately beseech 
 the members of our Church not to engage in a 
 speculation where the minute good, if any, is over- 
 powered by such stupendous evil. 
 
 BATAVIA CIRCUIT. 
 
 1860-61. This was our last circuit. The first 
 year I labored with brother James H. Herron, and 
 two-thirds of the last year with brother Thomas 
 Lee. At the close of the first year my health 
 seemed to be getting better, and in all good faith I 
 ventured on another appointment; but my com- 
 plaint increased in violence, till I saw I would have 
 to surrender. My external appearance was healthy, 
 and I kept my suffering to myself, and forced 
 myself through all kinds of weather and roads to 
 my appointments, till the third quarterly meeting 
 conference, when I made a statement of my peculiar 
 affliction, and requested the presiding elder to grant 
 me a dispensation. The brethren generally sympa- 
 thized with me, and treated me in a Christian and 
 genteel manner. I could say much good of this 
 circuit, but find my work has been swelling beyond 
 what I contemplated. At the Conference I asked for 
 a superannuated relation, and my brethren granted 
 it with all that affectionate and Christian spirit that 
 has always distinguished them. 
 
 I saw that I could not continue and do my duty
 
 440 THE CROSS. 
 
 without prematurely destroying myself; that there 
 were strong and healthy men anxious to enter the 
 field, and that it was altogether right that I should 
 superannuate. And seeing it was my duty, what else 
 remained to me but to march? And may the Lord 
 so prepare my soul by grace and judgment that 
 when I see my pathway clear, to march, even when 
 it must be to the air of Roslin Castle!
 
 MISCELLANEOUS WORK. 441 
 
 XXXV. 
 MISCELLANEOUS WORK. 
 
 As we have been in the habit of corresponding 
 with public papers and periodicals, it may be ex- 
 pected that we will say something on this subject. 
 We commenced very early in life. 'Bating our first 
 attempts, known only to ourself highly approved 
 to-day and utterly condemned to-morrow our first 
 adventure, of course in poetry, was an answer to 
 my oldest sister's address to the Petersburg volun- 
 teers before their departure. We can not remember 
 one line of that heroic effort, and we would not 
 attempt to rouse it up from its sweet and long 
 oblivion. 
 
 After moving to New Orleans I assisted my 
 brother some in a lively, and, among the American 
 population, a popular paper. After entering the 
 traveling connection, I wrote occasionally for the 
 Advocate. When the Ladies' Eepository was start- 
 ed, it seems that our great men did not give it that 
 help which might have been expected from them. 
 Bishop Hamline had a hard work on hand, but he 
 was sufficient. At no subsequent period has that 
 periodical been more in accordance with the taste
 
 442 THE CROSS. 
 
 of our membership, although some of the most ac- 
 complished of our ministry have directed it. "We 
 continued our help, such as it was, under succeed- 
 ing editors, till their correspondence has swelled 
 beyond their disposal. We have written also for 
 papers of a political cast; and the most part of the 
 Western Pilot is original professedly or not. We 
 might fill a large volume with these occasional 
 productions, but this would be foreign to our work; 
 and being closely allied to the passing events of the 
 time, their chief interest would now find no place. 
 We will, however, close with a sample of this part 
 of our labor. 
 
 THERE IS SURELY BUT ONE STEP BETWEEN 
 "EARTH AND HEAVEN. 
 
 While seated in my study, my mind adverted to 
 Mrs. Sarah Edwards, the accomplished consort of 
 President Jonathan Edwards, and the daughter of 
 James Pierpont, an eminent and useful minister 
 of New Haven. It is said, she was a young lady 
 of uncommon beauty a beauty which was rendered 
 unrivaled by that rare loveliness of expression 
 which is the result of a combination of intelligence, 
 cheerfulness, and benevolence. She possessed an 
 unusual share of natural talent, highly improved 
 by a liberal and polished education. She was gentle 
 and polite, and all her conduct and conversation 
 were under the government of Christian charity. 
 She was one of those distinguished flowers which,
 
 MISCELLANEOUS WOKE. 443 
 
 consecrated to God in the bud, prove no vain sacri- 
 fice. It is said she in a remarkable manner exhib- 
 ited the life and power of religion when only five 
 years of age. This early piety grew with her 
 growth, and strengthened with her strength. Her 
 uncommon devotion to God arrested the attention 
 of Mr. Edwards several years before their union, 
 and he recorded the following testimony of her 
 worth: "They say there is a young lady in New 
 Haven, who is beloved of the great Being who 
 made and governs the world; and that there are 
 certain seasons in which this great Being, in some 
 way or other, comes invisibly to her, and fills her 
 mind with exceeding sweet delight, and that she 
 hardly cares for any thing except to meditate on 
 him; that she expects after a little while to be 
 caught up to heaven, being assured that he loves 
 her too well to let her remain at a distance from 
 him always. There she is to dwell with him, and 
 to be ravished with his love and delight forever. 
 Therefore, if you present all the world before her, 
 with the richest of its treasures, she disregards it, 
 and is unmindful of any pain or affliction. She has 
 a strange sweetness in her mind, and singular purity 
 in her affections; is most just and conscientious in 
 all her conduct, and you could not persuade her to 
 any thing wrong or sinful if you would give her all 
 the world, lest she should offend this great Being. 
 She is of a wonderful sweetness, calmness, and uni- 
 versal benevolence of mind, especially after this
 
 444 THE CROSS. 
 
 great God has manifested himself to her mind. She 
 will sometimes go about from place to place, singing 
 sweetly, and seems to be always full of joy and 
 pleasure, and no one knows for what. She loves to 
 be alone, walking in the fields and groves, and 
 seems to have some invisible being conversing with 
 her." Perhaps there never was a more congenial 
 couple than Edwards and his guileless partner 
 such a duplicate as Thomson would have called a 
 "matchless pair," the only shadow of difference 
 this 
 
 " Hers the mild luster of the hlooming morn, 
 And his the radiance of the rising day." 
 
 Mrs. Edwards was a judicious and faithful mis- 
 tress of a family. She was not only alive to the 
 domestic duties that naturally fall into the province 
 of the female, but, as her husband was sometimes 
 pressed beyond measure in his ministerial work, she 
 relieved him much of those perplexing and outdoor 
 concerns which commonly belong to paternal super- 
 vision. This shows the superiority of her mind, for 
 she was not drilled to it by Eastern usages. She 
 also saw that, in the multitudinous business of her 
 husband, he might have to lament in the end, "I 
 have kept the vineyard of others, but my own vine- 
 yard I have not kept;" so she took, in a great 
 measure, the religious education of the children on 
 herself. She did not, like some mothers, wait till 
 her children should get more sense before she would 
 attend to their best interest. She was like that ma-
 
 MISCELLANEOUS WORK. 445 
 
 tron saint who, when she awakened her children in 
 the morning, implored God that they might, in early 
 life, "awake to righteousness, and sin not;" when 
 she washed their bodies, she prayed that God might 
 wash their souls in the laver of regeneration; when 
 she dressed them, she prayed that they might be 
 found in the wedding garment at the coming of the 
 Lord; and when she gave them the breast, she 
 called on God, with strong cries and tears, that she 
 might not nourish and raise a child for the devil. 
 But Mrs. Edwards did not stop here. She helped 
 much her husband in his ministerial work. She 
 was eminently qualified to do this. Her conversa- 
 tion was in heaven. It was not conversation about 
 religion, about its doctrines, its truths, its duties 
 her conversation was religion itself, the very heaven 
 of love. She encouraged and promoted female meet- 
 ings, and was prompt to take up her cross at every 
 call. There was no gloom in her theology. Her 
 religion was the religion of joy in the Holy Ghost. 
 It is perfectly overwhelming to read some of her 
 spiritual enjoyments left on record. On one occa- 
 sion she writes: "At the same time my heart and 
 soul all flowed out in love to Christ, so that there 
 seemed to be a constant flowing and renewing of 
 heavenly love from Christ's heart to mine, and I 
 appeared to myself to float and swim in those bright, 
 sweet beams of the love of Christ, like the motes 
 swimming in the beams of the sun, or streams of 
 light which came in at the windows. My soul re-
 
 446 THE CROSS. 
 
 mained in a kind of heavenly elysium. So far as I 
 am capable of making a comparison, I think that 
 what I felt each minute, during the continuance of 
 the whole time, was worth more than all the out- 
 ward joy and comfort which I had experienced in 
 my whole life put together." At another time, she 
 writes: "So intense were my feelings, when speak- 
 ing of these things, that I could not forbear rising 
 up, and leaping with joy and exultation. I felt, at 
 the same time, an exceeding strong and tender affec- 
 tion for the children of God, and realized, in a man- 
 ner exceedingly sweet and ravishing, the meaning 
 of Christ's prayer, 'That they all may be one, as 
 thou, Father, art in me, and I in thee, that they 
 also may be one in us.' This union seemed to me 
 an inconceivable, excellent, and sweet oneness; and, 
 at the same time, I felt that oneness in my soul 
 with the children of God. A hymn was sung, but 
 when these words were read, 
 
 1 My sighs at length are turned to songs, 
 The Comforter is come,' 
 
 so conscious was I of the joyful presence of the 
 Holy Spirit, I could scarcely refrain from leaping 
 with transports of joy." 
 
 Here my mind wandered from this pattern-mis- 
 tress of a parsonage to the sisters Fletcher and 
 Eogers, and a number of holy women on this side 
 of the sea, embraced in my own memory; and all 
 these were singularly fond of the communion of 
 saints an interchange of religious views and ex-
 
 MISCELLANEOUS WORK. 447 
 
 perience. Then it struck me, may not an exercise, 
 so dear to the saints in all ages on earth, even 
 enter into the inexplicable promise, " the joys of thy 
 Lord?" Then I exclaimed, "Surely, there is but 
 one step between earth and heaven !" 
 
 Then one of those reveries which sometimes take 
 possession of my mind came over me, and me- 
 thought my soul soared aloft beyond the bounds of 
 time and sense yea, was permitted to behold in 
 the unfading groves of paradise the blood-washed 
 throng. As the last lovely melody of celestial 
 music died away on the air, a spirit of unearthly 
 beauty arose, and in a voice far beyond the stretch 
 of mortal tune, addressed the mute and listening 
 multitudes. 
 
 NATHANAEL. "Brethren beloved, I stand before 
 this congregated election, as a peculiar case of happy 
 and facile transfer from the economy of Mount Zion, 
 into all the blessings of the new and everlasting 
 covenant. Born and raised an Israelite, I was zeal- 
 ous of the law, the sacrifices, and the traditions of 
 the fathers. They were weighty and imposing, and 
 even in the deadness of the letter were transcend- 
 ently superior to the vain and empty shows, and 
 indecent and lascivious sacrifices and offerings of 
 the idolatrous Gentiles. Moreover, I discovered, 
 from time to time, that beyond the outward exhibi- 
 tion of our mysteries and rights, there was a deep- 
 ly-hidden spirituality that I could but partially 
 apprehend. This drew my soul out in frequent and
 
 448 THE CROSS. 
 
 fervent prayer and meditation, especially as in that 
 day it was thought that the time of the promise 
 drew nigh. Sometimes I experienced what I be- 
 lieved to be signal manifestations of Divine power. 
 On a certain occasion, while deeply engaged under 
 a tree, I was suddenly overwhelmed by an unearthly 
 influence. It seemed as if celestial spirits were hov- 
 ering all around me, and as if the Divine arms were 
 underneath and round about me, and something 
 seemed to whisper, ' Hold up thy head, thy redemp- 
 tion draweth nigh.' Soon after this I met with 
 Philip of Bethsaida, and he said unto me, ' We have 
 found him of whom Moses in the law, and the 
 prophets, did write.' A bare allusion to our much- 
 loved and long looked-for Messiah, struck a cord 
 which vibrated through soul and body; but when 
 he added, 'Jesus of Nazareth,' my spirit sunk with- 
 in me, and I said rather petulantly, 'Can any good 
 thing come out of Nazareth?' His answer, though 
 short, was indicative of strong confidence, 'Come 
 and see.' It, moreover, struck with force a princi- 
 ple established within me; one that was afterward 
 so often insisted on by our beloved brother Paul 
 'Prove all things and hold fast to that which is 
 good.' How forcible are right words! And when 
 I saw the Savior, his exterior mien and Godlike 
 carriage struck me with solemn but delightful awe. 
 His first salutation was, 'Behold an Israelite, in- 
 deed, in whom there is no guile!' Here I felt 
 thrown into a very delicate difficulty. I might
 
 MISCELLANEOUS WORK* 449 
 
 have used a little voluntary humility, in denying 
 the allegation; but I could not do so without deny- 
 ing and departing from my true character; for, 
 through the mercy of the God of Abraham, and a 
 conflict of faith and prayer, I had gotten the vic- 
 tory over all guile and hypocrisy, and had often 
 sung with growing delight, 'Blessed is the man to 
 whom the Lord imputeth not iniquity ; and in whose 
 spirit there is no guile.' So I stood up in my integ- 
 rity, like Job, and answered, ' How knoweth thou 
 me ?' But when he said, ' Before Philip called thee, 
 when thou wast under the fig-tree, I saw thee,' my 
 very soul appeared to melt down into wonder, love, 
 and praise. For I knew that no mortal eye had 
 witnessed what had there transpired between God 
 and my poor soul under that shade the blessed 
 fig-tree ; and I immediately exclaimed, ' Rabbi, 
 Rabbi! thou art the Son of God; thou art the 
 King of Israel!' In that hour I began to compre- 
 hend the mystery, hid from the foundation of the 
 world. All my prejudices, and views, and senti- 
 ments which were not of God's right-hand planting 
 began to wither and die, and I sweetly and gradu- 
 ally entered into the new and heavenly Jerusalem. 
 What was commenced, through the faith in a coming 
 Messiah, was consummated in the powerful out- 
 pouring of the day of Pentecost a day to be held 
 in remembrance through the countless cycles of an 
 endless immortality. Brethren, I have had my 
 
 \\arfare, and my afflictions, which were common to 
 
 38
 
 450 THE CROSS. 
 
 the Church of the First-Born; and, 0, my last bit- 
 ter conflict! But they are all left on the other 
 side of the river. They are as though they had 
 not been while my soul swims in a sea of glory, 
 with God eternally shut in. Halleluiah to God, for 
 this heaven of love this continuity of bliss!" 
 
 Here, as this Christian patriarch ceased, a glow 
 of holy sympathy lighted up the innumerable host, 
 and the orchestra of heaven struck a peal for which 
 the laws of mortal interlocution have made no pro- 
 vision. Then one, who appeared to be as great a 
 favorite in heaven as he had been among the saints 
 on earth, rose to address the happy assemblage. 
 
 SIMON PETER. "Holy and beloved, the saluta- 
 tion of our Lord to Nathanael was the highest en- 
 comium ever conferred on man in his mortal state. 
 As it regards myself, in my unregenerated state, 
 ambition was my shrine. I gloried in being a son 
 of Abraham, and was zealous of the law. There 
 was nothing, however chivalrous or grand, that 
 was predicted of the coming Messiah as a mighty 
 conqueror and martial leader, which was too glowing 
 for my ambitious spirit. Believing in Jesus of Naza- 
 reth, I at first attached myself to his interests, in the 
 full conviction that it was he who would restore the 
 kingdom to Israel. Strange it was, that this con- 
 viction should abide after I had well marked his 
 humility of spirit, his benevolent bearing, and his 
 extreme deadness to the honors of the world and 
 the pride of life! I honestly aspired after power
 
 MISCELLANEOUS WORK. 451 
 
 and distinction under his administration. However, 
 above all these selfish breathings of my soul, there 
 arose an undying attachment to the Savior. I 
 counted not my life dear in the defense of his per- 
 son and his claims. And on that awful night, 
 when he predicted that he would be forsaken of all 
 before the morning-light, I thought this could not, 
 and should not be; and you remember with what 
 vehemence I exclaimed, 'Though all men forsake 
 you, yet will not I.' This I believed, because I 
 knew that I had animal courage enough to carry it 
 out, even unto death. And I was right glad when 
 he inquired if we had swords. From the purpose 
 of dying for him that night, if necessary, I did not 
 waver for a moment no, not even when the mob 
 approached, for then I drew my sword and made 
 my charge. But when I saw the immaculate Jesus 
 calmly extend his arm of power and close the wound 
 my blade had made; when he said, 'Put up thy 
 sword ; for he who takes the sword shall perish by 
 the sword;' when I saw that his kingdom was to 
 be established in righteousness, and not with the 
 shout of the warrior and garments stained with 
 blood ; when I saw that it was moral power and 
 suffering by which he was to conquer, my heart 
 seemed to die within me and I shamefully fled. 
 Still I could not give him up; all my interest 
 appeared to center in the mysterious sufferer. I 
 turned, and followed at a distance, and at last en- 
 tered into the judgment-hall. But 0, what unnat-
 
 452 THE CROSS. 
 
 ural tremors coursed along my nerves! and when I 
 was challenged as a follower of Christ challenged, 
 brethren, by a maid-servant I denied my best, my 
 greatest friend. And when they seemed resolved to 
 fasten the charge upon me, and I found that the 
 mild language that Jesus had taught me was likely 
 to betray me 0, shame on my guilty cowardice! 
 I cursed and swore most infamously. Just then the 
 cock's shrill clarion pierced through my soul. I 
 looked toward the bar at the silent Lamb, and his 
 eyes of reproof, swimming in tears of compassion, 
 rested on me; and well might it be said I went out 
 and wept bitterly. 0, the days of indescribable an- 
 guish almost of despair that I suffered till the 
 morning of the resurrection! Still I loved the 
 Lord, and I could not abandon the assembly of his 
 saints. Strange, that they bore with the back- 
 slider! I was permitted to mingle my tears with 
 his sorrowing disciples. The spirit had almost failed 
 before the God that made it, when, on the glorious 
 morning of the third day, certain sisters broke in upon 
 our conference, exclaiming, with unbridled joy, ' The 
 Lord has risen from the dead ! We have seen, we 
 have heard him he has spoken to us ; and we have 
 a message from the Lord to you, brethren ! He 
 sent us to say to Peter and the brethren, "Behold! 
 I go before you into Galilee.'" '0, not to me! 
 Did he say Peter?' 'Yes, Simon; he not only 
 mentioned thee, but mentioned thee first: "Go and 
 tell Peter and the brethren," were the words of our
 
 MISCELLANEOUS WORK. 453 
 
 risen Jesus.' 0, what unspeakable joy sprung up 
 in my soul ! And I said in my heart, ' Blessed be 
 the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who 
 has begotten us again unto a lively hope to an in- 
 heritance which is incorruptible, undefiled, and that 
 fadeth not away.' But my joy and peace were in- 
 creased in our interview on the sea-shore, where he 
 renewed my commission as often as I had denied 
 him on that horrible night. 'Feed my sheep.' On 
 the day of Pentecost a full consecration was sealed 
 on my soul; and, feeling that I was under greater 
 obligation to speak well of the Lord than others, 
 because in me much had been forgiven, I sprang to 
 my feet. 0, what light then shone on my soul! 
 The plan of salvation stood before me in all its un- 
 folded splendor. I saw that the Gospel was not in- 
 tended merely to free us from the Roman yoke; but 
 I saw yea, felt that it delivered us out of the 
 hands of all our enemies, that we might walk be- 
 fore God in righteousness and in holiness all the 
 days of our lives. 
 
 "Through many trials and much tribulation I 
 have reached the bright goal. And now let my pre- 
 tended successors below boast about Rome and the 
 patrimony of St. Peter ! What was my patrimony on 
 earth but a broken net, and a shattered bark, and 
 a daily death? Here is the patrimony that fadeth 
 not away; and the idea that it is not for me only, 
 but for all the blood-washed saints, enhances its 
 worth and highly sharpens my relish. Yes, .it
 
 454 THE CROSS. 
 
 fadeth not away! The roses of heaven will blush a 
 deeper red; the lilies will shed a more dazzling 
 white, while eternal ages are onward rolling 'it 
 fadeth not away !' Alleluiah!" 
 
 SAUL OF TARSUS. "I once said I was the chief 
 of sinners. Some of our more modern friends on 
 earth have since gone to extensive pains to soften 
 or whitewash that sentence. They have said that 
 Paul felt as all young converts feel, who knowing 
 the sore of their own hearts, and being ignorant of 
 the secret convictions of others, are disposed to 
 write hard things against themselves. Little do 
 they know of the divine impulse under which we 
 wrote and spoke. The storms of life all over and 
 heaven gained, I am not disposed to retract a single 
 word. Sin draws the shades of its complexion from 
 the circumstances attending its commission. There 
 might have been those in my day, who might have 
 been guilty of sins which Saul of Tarsus even 
 would have shuddered at; but they had not Saul's 
 culture, Saul's education, Saul's opportunities. I 
 was well-read in the sacred writings and the com- 
 mentaries of the most approved Rabbis; but I car- 
 ried with me all the time the most unmistakable 
 mark of the beast of hell the, spirit of persecution. 
 Bigotry congealed all the kindly streams of human 
 nature. I pursued even tender females in my 
 wrath, and I persecuted the Church of God beyond 
 measure. It is well for me that remorse can not 
 enter heaven; that tears can not stain the golden
 
 MISCELLANEOUS WORK. 455 
 
 streets of the New Jerusalem. Some men's sins 
 go before them to judgment; the sins of some 
 follow after. The day of retribution came. At 
 the gates of Lystra the cup of trembling was 
 pressed to my lips. I drank the bitterness of 
 Stephen's martyrdom, with the heavy interest of the 
 anguish of resuscitation, which Stephen never felt. 
 I, too, was persecuted, buffeted, whipped, impris- 
 oned, and shipwrecked ; but I gloried in my afflic- 
 tions, because I saw the retributive justice of God, 
 and because I knew that they would work out for 
 me a far more exceeding and eternal weight of 
 glory. Well do I remember the throes of the 
 new birth through which I passed on my way to 
 Damascus. While breathing out threatening and 
 slaughter against the disciples of the Lord, the 
 power of God arrested me. 'Saul, Saul, why 
 persecutest thou me?' And I said, 'Who art 
 thou, Lord?' I knew that I had persecuted 
 much and rather indiscriminately, and began to 
 suspect that in the heat of my zeal I had torn up 
 some wheat with the tares; and my inquiry was, in 
 what instance, in whose case I had offended the 
 Lord. But, 0! how was my whole soul dismayed 
 when I heard that hated name 'Jesus' of Naza- 
 reth! I saw my whole work condemned, and my- 
 self involved in black despair. For three days I 
 ate no pleasant bread and drank no reviving cor- 
 dial. All was midnight darkness. Then I be- 
 thought me of the means of grace, and kneeled
 
 456 THE CROSS. 
 
 before the Lord. Hope sprang into my soul, and I 
 began to look for deliverance. While sitting in 
 darkness and in the shadow of death, the door was 
 opened; Ananias, one of the persecuted, stood before 
 me. He might have said, '0, thou proud and 
 haughty persecutor of my brethren and sisters in 
 the kingdom and patience of Jesus Christ, has my 
 God humbled thee at last?' But no; he gently ap- 
 proached, laid his hand upon my head and said, 
 'Saul brother Saul, the Lord even Jesus who ap- 
 peared unto thee in the way hath sent me that 
 thou mightest receive thy sight, and be filled with 
 the Holy Ghost.' The scales fell from my eyes, and 
 blindness from my mind, I saw light in God's light, 
 and praised him from a feeling sense of his pardon- 
 ing love. And having obtained help of God, I per- 
 severed in the way enduring the cross, despising 
 the shame, and am now exalted to the kingdom on 
 high. And now the greatest boast I make in heav- 
 en's courts is this ' a sinner saved by grace!' " 
 
 Here, again, I exclaimed, "Surely, there is but 
 one step between earth and heaven!" But a voice 
 within said, "Yes; but in that step what trials 
 'in number, measure, weight,' may come! In that 
 mysterious tread, temptations, sorrows, bereave- 
 ments, sometimes shake the elect to his solid 
 foundation." 
 
 THE END.
 
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