UC-NRLF MES CO ex? TO THE PANAAA - PACIFIC INTERNATIONAL EXPOSITION Gullible 's Travels to the Panama-Pacific International Exposition By MOLLIE SLATER MERRILL n San Francisco, California Copyright 1915 by MOLLIE SLATER MERRILL GULLIBLE'S TRAVELS. In amaze, Lost, I gaze! Can our eyes Eeach thy size? May my lays Swell with praise! Swift. LATE I HAD NOTICED that my digni- fied title of "Captain Gullible" had been abbreviated to the more familiar one of "Cap" by many of the younger occupants of the Farallones. This, with numerous other slights, forced the conclusion upon me that while un- willing to declare myself ill-treated, I was being neglected to the point of contempt. I was born and raised on this small island group, situated not many miles from the Golden Gate, but that has nothing to do with the story of my adventures, which I am now about to relate. I had often looked longingly toward the mainland, which I saw outlined in the distance, and believing that some day it would be my good fortune to travel and see more of the world, I had closely observed the customs and manners of passengers on the boats which, in fair weather and "fowl," I had in- dustriously followed. I had also gained some knowledge of dif- ferent languages by the same close observation and the strength of my memory. My responsibilities and active duties had ceased upon the death of my little gray mate, and I felt that at last I was in a position to satisfy my desire for travel and scientific re- search. Therefore, on the morn- ing of the 19th day of February, 1915, after waiting until the other "gulls" had hurried away to "catch the first boat," I de- cided to leave the Farallones, firm in my determination not to return until I had seen "the world" and could come back covered with glory and renown. 313058 Page One The weather had been w6t and far from pleasant, but as a light breeze swept in from the sea the bright beams of the morning sun poured through the Golden Gate and lit up the prows of in-coming vessels, which, I believed, portended a bright future. I paused for an instant, lost in admiration at the wide sweep of sea, and sky, and shore. Then as I carefully threaded my way through the ships which lay at anchor, I became conscious of SOMETHING which lay before me, something golden and glorious. As I drew nearer I felt that at last my dreams were to be realized, for I beheld massed palaces and spacious courts bathed in the rich colors of Nature and the radiant adornment of art. I could form no idea of my whereabouts, and can give but a feeble account of what lay before me, but the magnificence, the splendor, so far excelled anything I had previously con- ceived that I could only liken it to the City of my dreams. The central portion of the site rose slightly above the sea, and was encircled on three sides by gently sloping ground. SECTION OF EXPOSITION YACHT HARBOR. I entered from the harbor side, and passed over immense palaces, which I immediately decided must be the abode of Royalty. Through stupendous openings in the sides of these palaces I entered great avenues lined with palms and other beautiful trees. There were also giant banks of bright flowers, and huge pools of water. From these avenues I looked into splendid courts, and my artistic eye was in no way offended by the marvelous blending of color. I saw figures and groupings of figures unlike any people I had ever beheld; they were of Page Two Page Three such 'pt odig&us si^e; theat 7 -jv'ould have been astonished had I not already passed into a stage which knew no astonishment. Too bewildered to pay attention to detail, and with eyes almost weary with the wonder of it all, I flew on. In a won- drous pool I saw mirrored large pillars and arches of most unusual coloring. "Truly this is 'classical,' " I mused, as I went on my way. I was lost in the mists of these sights and sounds, and hardly knew the nature of my own mind, but felt that solitude was extremely necessary in order to evolve the many puzzling questions with which it was filled ; most of the miniature lakes and lagoons which I had seen were already inhabited by various tribes of birds whose only taste in common with mine was water; but I now saw before me a Lake whose beauty filled me with rapture. It was unoccupied, save by a woman of most unusual size ; her nationality was unknown to me, but I heard some one in passing call her a "mermaid." By refer- ence to my pocket dictionary, I found her to be a "sea-woman." Believing we would be congenial, I took up my abode in the Lagoon at the east end of what I heard called "The Great South Garden." I looked about and must confess to never having seen a more beautiful sight. The country looked like enclosed fields of a continuous garden. Flowers were intermingled with trees of a great height, the whole compassed by a bright green hedge fully twenty-five feet high. From my knowledge of botany I drew the inference that it must have been growing for a great, great many years. I turned and beheld a huge Tower, the upper part of which seemed to take the form of terraces that led up to groups of figures, the whole surmounted by a miniature world. This Tower was set with jewels which glit- tered like diamonds. There were also domes and turrets, and from one of these the King had descend- ed and was advancing toward me mounted on an immense steed. I hurried away, as it was grow- ing late, and being exceedingly fatigued, resolved to postpone fur- ther explorations until the fol- lowing day. The next morning I rose early, took a dip in the excellent bathtub furnished by the "Hotel de Lagoona" (as I termed my Page Four stopping place), glanced into the Lake, which also served me as a mirror, and as I drew back perfectly satisfied with my appearance, I was almost positive I caught a glance of admira- tion in the eye of the mermaid. When following the boats I had often heard learned men discuss the problem of, "What Is Life?" Strange! I had only been away from home twenty-four hours, yet had found the solution of one deep question, for surely THIS is Life, I thought, as I strolled back and forth along the "Sea Wall." As yet I did not know the name of this enchanting spot. I now heard some one say, "Jewel City." Right well named, I answered, for every column, spire, and turret seemed to flash a tale of the countless wealth which I believed must live in this favored City. "Oh! Looka degul! looka degul!" a boy beneath me cried, as I was taking a "bird's-eye" view of the many won- ders. He shouted very loud, and pointed a finger directly at me, so I reasoned that he must be a page, and was making a proclamation to the King of my presence. Immediately the news of my arrival seemed to spread throughout the Kingdom. A confused sound greeted my ears. OPENING DAY CEREMONIES. and prodigous numbers of people crowded in to see me. For hours they poured through enormous gates. I believed that all the villages in the country must have been emptied, and I began to worry for fear business and household duties were being neglected. It was afterwards reckoned that over a Page Five quarter of a million people visited me the first day after my arrival. All night and during the early morning hours I had heard a knocking like that of people at work, and I now saw a huge stage capable of seating many people erected in front of the wonderful Tower set with jewels which I heard was 480 feet in height. There was now a general shout, followed by frequent repe- titions of a word which sounded like, "Hurrah, hurrah!" Then a number of people who seemed to be persons of quality mounted the stage and made me long speeches. Clearly they were welcoming me to their "Jewel City." All at once the multitude gave a great shout between pleasure and surprise, the sun burst forth from behind clouds nearly dazzling their eyes, and at the same time a terrific noise was heard like the bursting of a bomb. This was followed by others. I was so badly frightened that I did not see all that occurred, but at the risk of having my veracity questioned, I do solemnly assert, that from all parts of that enchanted garden beautiful streams of water poured forth, many straight in the air fountains, I heard them called, but to me it looked as if the inhabitants of the various lakes and lagoons were indulging in a most refreshing shower-bath. There was a great deal of music, much finer than any I had ever heard on the boats; flags were flying, and every one in that vast throng seemed glad and happy that I was there. Soon after noon, while taking a short flight, I noticed thousands of faces turned upward apparently watching me. "Wonderful! wonderful!" they murmured as one person. "Such graceful sweeps, and dips, and lines." Some remark was made about a "flapping-wing," so I was positive they were .alking about me; and I couldn't but wonder what my com- panions on the islands would think could they know of my importance, and the royal welcome I had received in a city which I l r new could have no equal. Glancing across the sky I saw a strange object. It closely resembled a bird, but was much larger than anything I had ever seen in the air. Clearly it was trying to imitate as well as draw attention from me. I must admit its imitations were clever, but to my surprise I found as I drew nearer, that wood, wire, and canvas were used in its construction, rather than bone, muscle, and feathers. I wondered how the public could be so "gulled" as to believe this object a bird. "Flying machine!" "Aeroplane!" I heard them call. "One of the greatest inventions of the age." I turned my head to Page- Six conceal a smile; what would my ancestors, who had "hatched out" flying machines generations ago, have thought could they have heard this statement? During the day I heard many expressions among the crowd, which, without manifesting curiosity or astonishment, I secretly wondered about. One that I recall as having heard very frequently, and spoken in many different tongues, was : "It seems to have sprung up over night, doesn't it?" I fully agreed, for as I glanced around it seemed that necromancy MUST be responsible for this mysterious city. "Only think that three years ago this was all marsh and tide-water, without a tree or plant upon it," was another phrase with which I became most familiar. I was puzzled, for as I looked over this great mass of vegetation, it showed that its growth had been tended with fostering care. I saw the work of a man with a well-balanced mind, and high intellect, rather than the wand of a magician. I believed that TIME, too, had played an important part in bringing about this state of per- fection, for I had watched the slow growth of trees and plants on the islands for a great many years. Each opening bud, each unfolding blossom, spoke of the skillful gardener, yet magic MUST also have been employed, if three years ago these vast acres were nothing but marsh and tide-water. "Oh, what a pity it can't last." I saw no reason why I should load the minds of these curious people from the store of my own knowledge, but I could scarce refrain from answer- ing in as melancholy a tone as their own, that it WOULD last, for it was my intention to spend weeks and even months of profitable time here. Many people also said: "Doesn't it seem a pity that those beautiful buildings have to be torn down?" I repressed a groan at their ignorance as I turned my head and wondered who could have a mind to destroy such buildings as I saw on all sides of me. I felt regretful as night fell, that darkness must shut out this splendid panorama. Then without warning an aston- Seven ishing thing happened: One by one the palaces, towers and domes flashed upon my view; jewels sparkled more brilliantly than they had under the sun's bright rays. I rubbed my eyes to see if perchance I had fallen asleep, or was under some enchantment, for I could see no logical cause for this wondrous light. I am ashamed to confess to such a weakness, but I was really frightened. Then what appeared to be a terrific storm broke. There were tremendous crashes, and bright lights streaked the sky. Imagination can figure nothing so grand, so surprising, and so astonishing. Ten thousand flashes of lightning seemed to be darting at the same time from every quarter of the heavens. I now looked toward the Harbor, and saw silvery shafts of light which seemed to come from a central point, and radiated like the spokes of a wheel, the lower beams seeming to parallel the horizon. There were many of these livid beams, and as they grew wider they came together like a solid sheet, and the great Celestial Dome was completely hidden by this radiant panoply. I now saw huge jets of steam and smoke rising high in the heavens, and feared there was a fire; then came glowing ruby lights, changing to green, purple and orange; every conceiv- able color and shade floated out in broad streamers over the city. I wondered if these foreign lights came from a deep hole in the ground wherein some weird mysterious colored sub- stance was burning, or, perchance, I had traveled a greater distance than I knew, and had come within range of the Northern Lights the "Aurora Borealis" of which I had heard Captains speak. I was awed and sought a dark spot in which to hide; it was no use, the whole city was radiant. Finally I saw a clump of trees on a small island where I believed I would be secure from observation. No sooner had I hidden in their shadow, however, than a near-by voice called out: That must be the "Illustrious Obscure." Evidently my fame had preceded me. Just then a bright shaft of light struck me full in the face. Some one called it a "Search-light," and I knew the King must be looking for me. Reassured by the cries of delight of the assembled multitude I came forth and stayed out much later than my accustomed bed-time. "How many jewels are there in the Tower?" I heard this question asked many times, and decided that it must be one of the leading questions of the day. Suddenly I thought of a way in which I might be of eminent service, for I felt bound by the law of gratitude to in some way repay these people who had Page Eight treated me with so much munificence and expense. I believed this Tower to be one of the seven wonders of the world, and resolved to count, and deliver to the King, the exact number of jewels in it, for I saw no other way for him to obtain this information, and I would at the same time cover myself with honor and glory. TO THE ILLUSTRIOUS OBSCURE ASPIRATION That living stream flowing as from Spirit Immortal by the Joy of Labor and the clouds. Sympathy with Nature as by Winds Renewing and glorifying the ages. and Waters sunward bourne. Page Nine At sunrise the next morning I began my task. The city was visited each day by vast throngs of people, but I am sure none of them had the least knowledge of my intention. But when they saw me circling round and round the globe on the very top of that great Tower, they were at first confounded with astonishment; then as they saw my design, the whole assemblage would at times set up wild bursts of applause. After I had for some time entertained them, to their infinite satisfaction and surprise, I began to feel weary ; accordingly I removed my spectacles, lighted on the space between the second and third terraces and rested for an hour. I found some of these spaces peopled by a strange race. However, my Page Ten duties were not to chronicle their peculiar manners and cus- toms, though will mention that both ladies and courtiers were richly clad, so presumed they were persons of importance and possessed of great wealth. As night came on I found I had hardly begun, but so earnest was my desire to finish my task that I decided to con- tinue far into the night if need be ; but those gorgeous lights so blinded me that I couldn't distinguish an emerald from a diamond ; sapphires and topaz all looked alike. I swayed and swirled, fluttered down toward the earth, then struggled back. I heard the cries of many hundreds of people, and as I flew toward the bay I found that the King and his entire Court stood on the shore, evidently waiting the issue of my great undertaking. I informed them in a loud voice that the many colored lights greatly interfered with my work, but that I would resume in the morning. On the morning of the fourth day I was greatly pained at my appearance as I glanced into my mirror; I also detected a glance of sympathy in the eye of the mermaid. At this moment two very sweet little girls passed my hotel. "I'll wager that you don't know how many jewels there are in that Tower," one of them said. "Oh, yes I do; there are 125,000." I was confounded. "How in the world do you suppose they found out?" I said, turning to the mermaid. "I was not half through and have confided in no one." Receiving merely a stony stare for a reply, I added, "What's the use, if our greatest services are of so little importance?" I am sure I must have had some hidden enemies, who, by their expressions, reflected upon my usefulness, for neither the King nor a single member of his Court ever said a word to me on this important subject. Being dispirited from toil, and somewhat overcome by failure and mortification, also feeling that malicious accusa- tions had been devised by enemies to prejudice the mind of the King against me, I had about decided to leave the Jewel City, continue my travels and possibly add to my discoveries; but hearing a loud voice I turned to my right and perceived a courtier speaking in a voice many degrees louder than a speaking trumpet. I soon understood that some further enter- tainment had been provided for me. I judged that my mild- ness and long suffering had impressed the King, and I took every conceivable method to cultivate this favorable im- pression. Page Eloven It appeared that the King desired to entertain me with some of his country's shows, which were said to surpass those of all other nations. I was diverted with none so much as some races in queer sorts of chariots, such as I had never seen, for while driven by men I do truthfully maintain they were drawn neither by horses or any other beast, yet went at a terrific speed. I believed this sport must be practiced only by people who had been trained in this art from their youth, and were candidates for high favor at Court. To show to what an extent my comfort was considered, I frequently heard people shout, "Rest-a!" "Rest-a!" I an- swered politely that I was not at all tired and kept on the wing. The King also ordered that part of his army with quarters in and about his metropolis to entertain me, which was done most pleasantly, and I witnessed the best military discipline I had ever imagined. In "Overlooking the City" I found it to be crescent shaped and situated on the shores of a large bay. The palaces were interspersed with great open courts, the three largest, and which I deemed the most important, ran north and south through the central group. The streets, courts, and palaces were so crowded that I thought I had never dreamed of so populous a city. I flew with much circumspection through a stupendous BIRD'S-EYE VIEW OF THE NORTHERN ENTRANCE TO THE COURT OF THE UNIVERSE. arcade at the base of the "Tower of Jewels," and passed very gently from the South Garden into the Court of the Universe. In the center of the Court was a beautiful sunken garden sur- Page Twelve rounded by benches so that a goodly number of people could sit and enjoy the beauties of this, the largest and most im- posing of the courts. There were groupings of strange looking figures, fauns, satyrs, and nymphs, I heard them called, and resolved to look up their nationality when I could do so with- out exposing my ignorance. To the West I went through an immense arch into the "Court of the Four Seasons." In each of the four corners of this Court niches were cut into the encircling palaces, where there were paintings and figures representing Spring, Summer, Autumn, and Winter. In the center of the Court was a group of figures ; one of these was a lady called "Ceres." I looked up her history and found she was the "Goddess of Agriculture," engaged in dispensing the bounties of nature. One night I passed to the East from the "Court of the Universe" into the "Court of Abundance." Immediately I felt myself to be under a mystic spell. There were large urns filled with a boiling, steaming mass of color, which I believed must be tended by creatures other than of this earth. While flying one day on the Harbor side of the city, I had a very bad scare. I looked up just in time, for there stood a man with a bow, the arrow ready to discharge, aimed straight at my left eye. "Don't shoot; don't shoot!" I cried; "don't you know it's a penal offense?" I suppose I may be blamed for a rambling disposition, but my desire for seeing the world was whetted by glimpses of "The States" I had obtained in my numerous flights. There- Page Thirteen fore one morning about a fortnight after my ar- rival I determined to extend my travels and leave further description of the Jewel City until my return. At the risk of being considered vain I cannot but record the attention and admiration I received as I slowly and majestically rose to take my de- parture. I spread my wings, then hovered, neither advancing nor receding. I dropped to the ground, then rose again ; I manipulated my "wing- warping" so well that my balance was perfect, and the multitude below looked on in rapt admira- tion as I hung suspended with "no visible means of support." I drifted back, then glided ahead. Having thus prepared, and all things being well, I "set sail" for the West. I shall not trouble to relate the particulars of this voyage, for they were insignificant, though being of a serious turn of mind they served to enlarge my thoughts and imagination. "The States" were more "United" than I thought. I was somewhat surprised that they covered so small an area. I had provided myself with a map, but must admit I found it very puzzling, as it in no way corresponded with the location of "The States" as I found them. I could not but conclude that the geographers were in error and ought to correct their maps, wherein I should be very glad to lend them my assistance. I determined to see as much of this section of the world as possible, for two reasons : first, I had fully determined to visit the foreign countries, and believed I should become acquainted with my own first; second, I did not want the in- habitants to have reason to complain that I had done them an injustice by a false and inadequate representation. I passed very conveniently from one State to another, many of which were divided only by narrow lanes and alleys, while others were separated by wide streets. The people had evidently received notice of my coming, for many of the win- dows were left open purposely. Looking through these I beheld the most splendid apartments I had ever seen. I saw Governors, and others in high authority, in their several lodgings, with their chief attendants about them, many of whom smiled pleasantly upon me. Massachusetts stood in the center of a street where two others met; from here I determined to go to California, and CALDER'S COLUMN OF PROGRESS. Page Fourteen Page Fifteen from there direct to Japan. My insatiable desire to see foreign countries would not suffer me to remain long in this State. By consulting my map, I concluded that geographers were in great error in supposing there was nothing but water be- tween California and Japan. I was more perplexed than ever by the situation of the foreign countries, for again they did not in the least resemble my map of the world. At last a great light broke upon me ; I had heard that a number of the mighty powers of Europe had been engaged in a most obstinate war, and I had also heard it declared that there would have to be "A new map of Europe" after the cessation of the internecine disturbance. I now argued from the amiable,' even joyous, attitude of these countries that the war was over, and immediately a new thought seized me, which, in my humble opinion, was a very great one, and which should justly fill the whole world with admiration. I resolved to set about and complete a new map of Europe before my return to my own country. The scene of this whole voyage made so strong an impres- sion on my mind, and is so deeply fixed in my memory, that I hate to omit a single occurrence, but must do so for fear of being censured as tedious. But there is one incident which, without any affectation of learning or style, and chiefly because of its truth, I must relate ! I was flying over some beautiful and highly colored houses in China, when a very richly and gayly attired native observed me. I think he must have been the Emperor, but before I could extend him any salutation whatever, he called out very loudly, "Ho-le-ma?" I had an imperfect knowledge of his language, but remembered a phrase I had learned from passen- gers on the boats, and answered in a polite style suitable for Page Sixteen CALIFORNIA MASSACHUSETTS JAPAN Page Seventeen Court, and not otherwise defective than by a foreign accent, "Fa-ti-ma?" When he heard my voice and knew what I said to be regular and rational, the Emperor, though he seemed as learned as any person in his Dominion, could not conceal his astonish- ment. For fear he would not be satisfied with my account of how I came to be in his Kingdom, I flew on. I was deeply impressed by the beauties of all the foreign countries, and should like to give a minute description of them, but for fear of being unjustly criticized and accused of en- larging, as many travelers are charged with, I shall run to the other extreme and say nothing, other than that I could have lived happily in this foreign country had not the lure of the "Jewel City" been so strong. I had been exposed to several ridiculous and mortifying experiences. I remember one day when I made an allusion to some very small trees growing in a garden in Japan. I merely wanted to impart to the gardeners some of MY knowledge of Horticulture, and instruct them in the cultivation of trees, whereby they might attain the height of those in the Jewel City. I saw nothing humorous in this, but some of the resi- dents seemed to consider it very funny, and apparently wished me to understand that they considered their knowledge super- ior to mine inasmuch as they knew how to keep their trees small. Knowing of the friendly relations existing between Japan and California, I directed my return course straight for that State. My journey was without adventure or accident worth relating. From California I at once continued on my way, for I felt it would be no disagreeable amusement to be once more in the "Jewel City." Again notice must have been given of my return, for a concert was being held at Court, and I am confident that all the drums and trumpets of a royal army were beating and sounding together as I flew straight on to the Lagoon at the east end of the Great South Garden. I was sure I caught a joyous look in the eye of the dignified mermaid. Being of an active and restless disposition, after a few days rest I again felt an overpowering desire to travel. I heard a great many people talking about the "Zone." Fearing they did not understand the real importance of the subject, I was tempted to tell them that the "Zone" was a strip of territory which the United States had purchased from Panama, also that a great ditch, or canal, had been dug across Page Eighteen the Isthmus of Panama as a repository for water in order that ships might pass from one ocean to the other. However, not wishing to be considered pedantic, and being averse to an accusation of affectation, I, with a great amount of tact and delicacy, maintained a discreet silence. I found the Zone well inhabited. I conjectured that these people were not all "workers" on the "Big Ditch," for hun- LOOKIXG EAST OX THE "ZONE." dreds of every color and nationality, some in holiday attire, others fantastically garbed, were leisurely strolling up and down the main thoroughfare, which was a broad street on each side of which were cities, walled towns and villages. Here again I found Historians and Geographers to be in error, for instead of the Zone being ten miles wide and fifty miles long, as I had repeatedly heard that it was, I found it by actual measurement to be just 3,000 feet long, and its entire area I found comprised sixty-five acres. I visited many historical and well-known places, and was surprised at the proximity of the "Grand Canyon of Arizona" and "Yellowstone Park" to the "Panama Canal." I had heard that many years ago other projectors had planned this Canal, but after employing a great many men for a long period the work miscarried. I am a great admirer of projects, and have a most enterprising spirit, therefore I spent a considerable time noting the details of the Panama Canal. After due consideration. I arrived at the conclusion, from its Page Nineteen harmonious workings, that the Canal was completed, and, for the benefit of my people who had no means of ascertaining this fact, I jotted the same down in my note book. On all sides of the Zone I saw sights which I hardly dare hope will obtain belief. However, they can be attested by millions. I saw animals whose behavior was so orderly, so rational and so ingenious, that it seemed to me that a people who could so far civilize dumb creatures, must needs excel in wisdom all other nations of the world. I had reached a scientific solution of many strange phe- nomena which I had observed on the Zone, but jealousy is so common everywhere that I was never asked for the result of my researches. I had also escaped from many perilous situa- tions, which inspired me with a strong impulse to return to my native country. My "tour of the world" was completed. Somewhere I had heard the phrase, "The world is not so big after all." I had always believed to the contrary, this belief being strengthened, no doubt, by the natural propensity of many persons to exaggerate. I must now speak frankly and confess, that while my desire for travel and discovery was not ap- peased, I feared there was nothing more for me to see. I shall never forget my sensation when I looked up and saw "Toy Land." Here was a new country, and I believed myself to be the discoverer, for the entrance was guarded by two soldiers of such an immense height and severe demeanor, that I was sure they had never given access to their Dominion to people from any other country. What I supposed to be the King's palace was not a reg- ular structure, but a heap of buildings, which my knowledge of mathematics enabled me to see were very ill-built. Many of the walls were not perpendicular. This defect must have arisen from the lack of knowledge of the inhabitants of prac- tical geometry, so that the instructions they gave to their workmen caused endless mistakes. Imagination, fancy, and Page Twenty invention seemed to have run riot here, rather than practical actions and conduct in life. I think I must have behaved strangely, for I almost felt that I had lost my wits. I had never dreamed of a race, human and animal, so singular both in shape and countenance. Many had their heads reclined either to the right or left, some had their eyes turned inward, others directly up to the heavens. Their outward garments were of the brightest hues, many of them cleverly interwoven with spoons, fiddles, and other articles hitherto unknown to me. I concluded that the minds of these people must be taken up with intense speculations, for they neither spoke, nor attended to the discourse of others. However, their behavior was so reasonable and methodical that I concluded they must be magicians who had some purpose in thus transforming themselves, or perhaps, they were merely amazed at the sight of me. I felt that I could not do justice to the strange animals, plants and trees which I saw on all sides, and to my mind it was evident that nature in the production of such extraordinary shapes and bulk, had confined herself wholly to this queer coun- try. The reason of which I leave to be determined by Philos- ophers other than myself. I now felt that I had rendered myself invaluable, and had performed services so eminent, and adorned with such honor and integrity, that I might justly be ranked with such dis- coverers as Columbus. Balboa, and Doctor Cook. In keeping a faithful record of the sights I had seen, the customs and manners of the people in the many countries I had visited, I had conceived that my own people who had not enjoyed the privilege of travel would be anxious to have an account of mine. It was my determination to employ my thoughts for the improvement of my race, and give to them through the medium of our home paper, "The Beak-on Light," the result of my travels and wonderful discovery. I went back to the "Hotel-de-Lagoona," liquidated my bill, and as I bade the mermaid adieu, I distinctly saw great tears falling from her eyes and splashing into the Lake below. About eleven o'clock while I was still maturing my plans for home-going I observed a wild rush toward a place called the "49 Camp." I was not sure whether a register of my birth had been preserved, and without it could form no definite idea of my age, but as I saw many who I was sure were either older or younger than myself. I concluded that a certificate of birth was not necessary to gain admittance to the "49 Camp." Page Twenty-one As I entered, I found everyone gesticulating, and talking about GOLD. I immediately arrived at the conclusion that I had discovered a gold mine, about which I had frequently heard. Many people were paying for pans, and sifting sand in search of gold. Having long practiced frugality, I went directly to work scratching in the sand, believing that I was "locating my claim." Very soon I saw something glistening in the sunlight. Unaccustomed to the sight of gold. I was not sure it was not a kernel of corn, but as I had not breakfasted, I greedily swallowed it. Then a queer thing happened; immediately I was seized with an illness the like of which I had never experi- enced; my memory deserted me, I forgot all the things I had cared most about, I lost all desire for learning, science, philosophy, and renown. I was trembling with excitement, and my body was consumed as with an inward fire. All at once I realized my state! I had heard that there was danger of contagion in crowds, and I knew I had caught the "gold fever." All ennui was gone; feverishly I scratched, resolved for once to "get my fill of gold." Again envy and jealousy were directed toward me, for some one called out, angrily, "Drive that gull out of here, he's getting all the gold." Evidently I had not substantiated my "claim" and I tried to rise, but found it hard. As I redoubled my efforts, I heard some one in passing say, "There'll be heavy crops this year, owing to the rain." It must be the rain, I thought. My strug- gles caused a great deal of merriment; two men standing near were laughing uproariously. "Guess he never heard Mark Twain's story of the 'jumping frog.'" one of them said. My eyes filled with tears of anger and mortification. I was no "croaker" and did not care to be likened to a frog, and could see no reason for a "jumping" one being considered so ludi- crous. I had heard of people who had "more gold than they knew what to do with," and I now found myself in that pre- dicament. Good fortune came to my rescue, for as in answer to my thoughts came the query : "What are you going to do with your gold?" "Oh, I guess I'll take it to the mint," came a laughing reply. This was beyond my wildest hopes for I knew of an excellent bed of mint on the islands, and I could now return with wealth, added to glory and renown. Due to an uncomfortable heaviness in my breast, I was "flying low," when I observed a number of what looked to be my own tribe on a large green sward at no consider- able distance from the "Jewel City." As I drew near I Page Twenty-two observed something familiar about the flock, but was never- theless surprised when a number called out in unison, and with amazing familiarity: "Hello, Cap, so you've concluded to 'come down' and be one of us, have you?" I drew myself up with dignity, but had the curiosity to inquire in a particular manner how such great numbers hap- pened to be "over." Thinking possibly the report that I had arrived might have reached them, and that they had come out of curiosity to see me, I said as much. "Oh. no," they answered with a degree of flippancy entirely uncalled for, "we come over to the Exposition every day; Great Show, hey Cap?" Page Twentv-three "I don't quite understand you," I said, with a smile of pity at their ignorance. "I am now a traveller, I have seen ALL THE WORLD, I have also discovered a new Land, and have located a gold mine, since I saw you." As they seemed to have no curiosity, I modestly continued, and told them of the pleas- ure I had experienced in seeing the various States and Empires. I enlarged upon many other topics with the natural desire to be entertaining. When I paused there was a good deal of chatter among them as well as some laughter, which I felt to be at my expense. After a silence of a few seconds one of them told me that his friends and mine, as I believed them to be, were very much pleased with my remarks and were desirous of hearing more of my travels. I answered that it was easy to be eloquent on so copious a subject, and I freely own that it gave me inexpressible delight to give this account, also I could not forbear falling into ex- pressions, perhaps a little too extravagant, as I described the ancient cities and obscure villages I had visited. I also men- tioned the fact of having gone "by land" from California to Japan. This speech produced loud laughter and they seemed to consider that I was there merely to furnish them with some ridiculous story. At this, a young gull, who, as he appeared anxious to right my wrongs, I shall call Redressal, proved himself my true friend, and commanded the noisy tribe to subside. He bade me continue and listened with great attention, frequently taking notes of what I said, as well as memoranda of ques- tions he intended asking me. I told him that I estimated the people who had visited me to be among the millions. I did not omit the splendid enter- tainment I had received at the hands of the King and his court on the first day after my arrival at the Jewel City. "What day was that?" a young gull asked, with a certain amount of pertness. I felt that I had descended upon a court of justice, being thus subjected to queries, doubts, and objections, but answered with my usual dignity and precision that it was the 20th day of February, 1915. "The day the big Exposition opened," the noisy crowd shouted, but they were immediately curbed by Redressal, who, after consulting his notes, said that he desired to set me right in a few mistakes I had made, and which I had evidently fallen Page Twenty-four into through the common fault of our race, and upon that con- sideration, was less answerable for them. In reply to my query as to what I was supposed to deduce from this remarkable statement, I was reminded of the fact that I was a GULL. Redressal then desired me to know that what I had re- garded as "The whole world," was in reality a "Fair" an "Exposition." My leniency toward his lack of wisdom forbade my doing more than to shake my head, "for," I said, "I have frequently heard wise and learned men say, that 'the whole world is here.' " VIEW OF EXHIBIT PALACES FROM TOWER OF JEWELS. 1 Machinery. 2 Varied Industries. 3 Mines and Metallurgy. 4 Manufactures. 5 Transportation. 6 Court of Abundance. "That is true," he said, "for this is the greatest Exposition ever known, and the whole world comes to see it." I assured him how desirous I was to be set right on every point, and asked if it were possible for him to explain the object and uses of the many palaces I had seen, if, as he intimated, they were NOT the abode of Royalty. He said he would briefly give me a summary of the most material points of this great Exposition. He discoursed upon trade and manufactures, on art and science; but I shall only set down the substance of what passed between us. He called my wondrous palaces "Exhibit palaces," and gave to each a name as follows: Mines and Metallurgy. Transportation, Agriculture, Food Products, Education and Social Economy, Page Twenty-five EASTERN ENTRANCE, PALACE OF VARIED INDUSTRIES. Liberal Arts, Manufactures, and Varied Industries. The joined walls of these palaces formed a parallelogram, which, he said, was flanked on one side by the massive semi-circular Palace of Fine Arts, and on the other by Machinery Palace. I now had a greater respect than ever for Redressal, for he had shown that he had a good understanding of mathe- matics, and in order to prove that I was not opinionated, and as truth always forces its way into rational minds, I shall so far do justice to this youth as to acknowledge that ALL of his views did not appear to be visionary, and I was convinced of the veracity of at least a part of his explanation. The inquiry lasted several hours, and I was rallied upon my "Tour of the World." Redressal told me that "The States." and foreign countries were merely representative of courtesies and relations and were here to participate in an International and Universal Exposition in celebration of the great physical performance of building the Panama Canal. "Oh, yes, I forgot to tell you that the Canal is completed. I have visited the Zone and found the Canal in perfect working order." I said this simply, and without any affectation of style, or language, for while firmly convinced that at least THIS part of my story would carry weight, I did not want to appear bombastic. Nevertheless there was a great deal of hissing and hooting among this disrespectful tribe, which even the respect due Redressal could not make them repress. I smothered my resentment, and Redressal with a great amount of patience explained that the Canal I had seen was a "model" and the Zone a vast amusement concession. The flock could no longer be kept within bounds, for, they said, "We can't stay away from the Exposition any longer, Page Twentv-six Cap ; and you had better quit trying to be a 'higher up,' let the Fair alone, and go back to the Farallones." I paid no attention, but flew over to the "Marina," a broad esplanade which parallels the bay for a great distance. Flying slowly back and forth, I thought long and carefully over what I had heard, as I reflected how ineffectual it is for a person to attempt to do himself honor among those who are out of all degree of comparison with him. And far away on the horizon a Sea Gull was heard repeat- ing to himself: "Exposition" "Exposition" "The Greatest Exposition Ever Known!" Page Twenty-seven UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA LIBRARY BERKELEY Return to desk from which borrowed. This book is DUE on the last date stamped below. 21-100i-9,'47(A5702sl6)476 29Apr'62JW fcEC'D LD APR 30 1962 RECEIVED MAY I 5 1996 CIRCULATION DEPT. AU3 1 1960 I 6 1982 .GL JUL22U SENT ON ILL JAN 7 1995 U. C. BERKELEY NOV 2 6 1999 OCT 08 2001 u - C.